#won't let you have that life. anyway fuck the cops.

[attila-werther]

:)

[all-purpose-dish-soap]

28 / 1.7k / soap soulmate au, part 5

...

Soap stares at his name where it's inked across your skin. You should be his enemy. He's sitting across from you, your interrogator in this dimly lit weapons closet. You refuse to look at him. But his gaze bores into you anyway, intense on your eyes, your lips, the cuts and bruises on your face. He wants you. But he can only have you once you've given him the information Captain Price needs.

"Tell me where Alejandro is," he says. "That's all you need to do."

A muscle in your jaw twitches when he mentions Graves' name, but you bite your tongue. You won't let him shake your resolve like he did in Las Almas. You should've killed him on sight.

"What Graves is doing to Alejandro--you know it's wrong." Soap’s gaze is steady. You're so close. He wants you so badly it hurts. "He's not a good man.”

"You have no idea what kind of man he is," you say.

"I know exactly the kind of man he is," he growls. "I saw what he did to the people in Las Almas. He called them dirty cops and had them executed when they said they didn't know anything. Innocent people. In front of their families. Their children." Soap's hands curl into fists on the table between you. "He's not the kind of man who deserves your loyalty."

Your cuffs clink as your arms flex against the chair. "You wouldn't understand."

"You're right. I wouldn't." Soap's knuckles pop, his voice low and dark. All his life he's waited for you. Now Graves--fucking Graves, who betrayed Soap and his team and tried to murder them all--is somehow the one keeping you from him. "I don't understand what you see in that bastard."

You say nothing, eyes trained on the far wall.

Soap's shoulders tighten. "You're just a tool to him."

"I’m a soldier. I choose to follow orders. So do you.”

"You're following his orders. You think that makes you a soldier, being a weapon? No. Makes you a damn dog."

You say nothing.

Soap grips the table until it creaks. "You think he cares about you.”

"It doesn't matter if he does or not."

"It does so bloody matter. You’re no’ some pawn he can just throw away." God damn you. He wants to grab you with both hands and shake you. To hell with this interrogation--he's got half a mind to lock you down somewhere padded until you get it through your skull that you're not worthless. He scowls at you. "You're better than this. You have to be."

Cold irritation seeps through your mask. "Am I?" Soulmate or not, he doesn’t know you.

At the look on your face, Soap's scowl deepens. He's going to kill that bastard, and he's going to do it slowly. "What about Graves is more important to you than the innocent lives he took? Does that mean nothing to you?”

"Orders are orders."

Soap's voice drops to a dangerous pitch. "Look me in the eye and say that.”

You don’t. You tell yourself it’s because he has no power over you. He can’t tell you what to do.

Soap crosses his arms. "'S what I thought. You're bluffing."

"I'm not."

"Bullshit. Graves is nothing but Shepherd's lapdog. Gettin’ paid to commit goddamn war crimes.”

"Shut your mouth," you snap. "You have no idea what happened--"

You stumble on the next syllable and go silent, realizing suddenly that you're looking him in the eye.

Johnny's a man of impulse, and it takes all the self-control he has to keep himself in place the moment you lock eyes. The pull he feels to you right now is overwhelming. You're in reach. He leans forward. Those brilliant blue eyes of his see all the way down into your soul. They’re just the same as you remember--eerily vivid, pupils blown, with his jaw set hard.

"What happened to what, darlin'?"

You shift, skin prickling. You want to cross your arms over yourself and clap your hand over the soulmark on your neck. "You don't know what happened in Al Mazrah."

"You were ambushed."

You nod, remembering that night of the mission. You've seen your squadmates die before. It's a hazard of the job, part of being a mercenary. But that night--seeing so many Shadows gunned down before they could so much as draw their weapons--it still haunts you.

"Shepard didn't know. It wasn't like we-- it was supposed to be a simple transport mission."

"It was a black bag op."

"That's what Shadows do. We take missions people don't like. Someone has to step in where you military dogs won't."

"Where was Shepherd when it went tits up, hm?" Soap's lip curls. "No air support on an illegal op. He left you to be killed. And now he needs someone to blame. It's not gonna be him taking that bullet. It's gonna be you."

"Captain Graves can handle it."

Soap lets out a rough sigh. Your insistence on Graves is rubbing him raw. You could have died on that op two months ago. And then what? He'd have never met you, only found your name later in stone on some memorial somewhere. The thought makes his chest go cold and his blood run hot. It could still happen. If he can't tear you away from this bloody mercenary work, you'll never be his. Christ. He can't let that happen. He won't. You're not going back to the Shadow Company. He'll tear Graves into pieces before he lets that happen.

He fixates on your soulmark again. Why can't he focus on getting the information Price needs? All he can think about right now is the scab on your lip, the way your pupils dilate when you look at him. Your body wants his even as you're spitting venom. The fire in you matches his own, and he wants more.

"Graves isn't here," Soap tells you. "And I'm not takin’ chances. You’re not going back to Shepherd, and you’re sure as hell not going back to Graves. You're mine."

You pull on your cuffs, hating the way the possessive note in his voice makes your stomach flip. "You don't get to decide that."

"Neither do you.”

"Isn't a matter of choice. It's a matter of what you’re gonnae do about it."

You swallow and watch his gaze track down your throat. He's close. When did he lean in? Why aren't you pulling back?

No, you tell yourself, you’re not scared. You’re in control. You lean a millimeter closer. "You can't keep me here."

His eyes brighten, gaze so intense it warms your skin. "Careful, darlin'. You don't want to throw down that gauntlet."

"And you expect me to tell you whatever you want to know? Fuck my career, fuck my squadmates?"

"If you weren't so damn dense, I'd--" He mutters another string of curses in that thick Scottish accent, standing from his chair and pacing the tight room. "You don't understand what I'm offerin’. You don't need them. You have me an' mine."

He circles around to your side of the interrogation table and kneels next to you, his expression an open plea for you to listen. You stare down at him with your heart suddenly in your throat. You can't backpedal. You can't look away.

He searches your face. Even roughed up, even pissing him off, you're beautiful. Damn it, he's going to do something stupid if he doesn't control himself.

He keeps his voice low and even. "You were expendable to them. You're expendable to Graves. You're no' expendable to me." He reaches up to you, and you go still. His hand is hot on your skin. His grip is surely strong enough to break bone. But only his thumb drags along your lip. His eyes follow the motion. "Your loyalty should be for people who care about you. I'm on your side, ya wee shite. Just tell me how to get to Alejandro and I'll get you out of here. I'll make sure you're safe. That's all I need to know."

You stare down at him. Your heart beats in your ears, and his pulse hammers with yours. You can feel it through his thumb against the sensitive skin on your lower lip.

Johnny wants you so badly you almost give in. He thinks he's telling the truth--that he'll protect you. But he doesn't know any better. You're not who he wants you to be. You're not soft. You're not good. Why does he act like he can see something redeemable in you?

Being his soulmate doesn't guarantee you a goddamn thing. Promises don't afford you any more protection than you've already given yourself. You know that very well. People aren't reliable. Soulmarks don’t fix everything. They’re just ink.

Whatever he sees when he looks up at you makes something cold and sharp settle in his chest. His throat constricts. He's pushing, he knows he is, and it's the wrong move with you. He's never been this desperate for anyone.

"Darlin'. Don't do that. Don't shut me out." His voice wavers just like his resolve. He'd protect you to his last. You refuse to see that, and he can't make you.

You look away, pulling away from his hand. "I don't trust you."

Johnny's stomach drops, and he digs his fingers into the metal chair to stop himself from digging them into you.

You want him. He can see it in the set of your shoulders, how tight you hold yourself when he's close to you. You want him despite yourself, and you still refuse. It doesn't matter how rational a decision it should be to accept his help. There's something else happening in your head that's keeping your walls up, and he's starting to realize it's not just Graves. It can't be.

He watches you for a long moment. He doesn't want you to hurt, but he's not stupid enough to believe you'll soften up and come around with time. You're a soldier.

Finally, Soap stands. If you don’t tell him what he needs to know, you’ll remain a hostage, and won’t be able to have you. He won’t accept that.

"Fine," he says, pushing his way out the door. "We’ll do this the hard way."

...

part 1 / part 2 / part 3 / part 4 / [part 5] / part 6 / part 7 / part 8 / part 9 / part 10 / part 11 / part 12

more Soap / masterlist tag

[brucewaynehater101]

It really gets me so mad that in Batman: The Animated series when all Joker Junior happens they let Tim go. Just like that. WTF???

That's your boy Bruce, the one you drive in your limo, the one that gets an allowance, the one that impersonates you so good because he's your son. And the minute he goes through the worst experience of his life you just let him go.

Like, I get my boy Tim, him been there just reminds him of his trauma, and if being away helps him, then go away, no one's gonna judge you.

BUT 40 YEARS OF SILENCE

Like. Man. Wtf.

And I get the series has other problems (Bruce and Babs together- yuck )

But Tim, hurt Tim forced to go through it alone.

It hurts me so much, it haunts me.

Fuck. I need to watch that series. I was a wee bit scared cause I thought, at first, that Tim got stuck as Joker. I couldn't handle that, tbh. I heard he doesn't, though, so I'm down to try.

However, that's so fucking tragic. Just Tim handling that trauma alone when Bruce is aware of it. I've seen some cool AUs where Bruce and the others aren't aware, but somehow it's worse where Bruce just ignored Tim (or that it happened to him).

40 is fucking bonkers though.

I kind of want an AU where Tim reaches the 10 year anniversary of the JJ incident. The only person who knows is Bruce (maybe Alfred if you want to make him guilty/bad). The age Tim is can vary (from like 19-24), but it'd be hella cool to see the fallout of everyone else learning that Bruce has been a dick to Tim for that. This would be cool if Tim was RR at this point.

Counter AU:

JJ happens when Tim is Robin, and Bruce fires Tim "for his own safety" or whatever. No one else, not even Barbara, knows about this incident. All they know is that there *was* a third Robin, but now there's not.

Other people rein Bruce in until Damian comes along. Maybe Cass helps or something (for plot purposes, Steph isn't Robin. She does get vigilante-adopted by Oracle, though, and joins the Birds of Prey).

Either way, Tim is no longer Robin and basically ignored by Bruce due to Bruce's guilt/fear (not an excuse. Bruce is a huge colossal asshole for that. This is just his reasoning).

The only people who know who the third Robin was are Bruce, Babs, Dick, Alfred, Leslie, Jason, and Talia (technically Ra's too). No one but Jason and Talia know that Jason knows who the third Robin was.

Bruce, once again, is the only one who knows about JJ and why Tim stopped being Robin (maybe Alfred too, but fun drama if Alfred finds out what Bruce did to Tim).

Anyways, Jason never attacks Tim because Tim wasn't Robin by that point. Damian doesn't either. They don't have favorable opinions of Tim, but he's not really important to them in the grand scheme of things.

Dick and Babs initially kept in contact with Tim, but they slowly stopped checking up with him due to the shitshow of their lives (like Jason coming back).

Tim moves out of Gotham for a few years. He was never adopted at this point and keeps up the fake uncle thing. He's pissed at Bruce for firing him (that man can not tell Tim to stop being a vigilante. That's so fucking hypocritical and that man isn't Tim's father), but he can't do anything about it. Bruce can't stop him from being a vigilante if he isn't in Gotham, though [Tim also gets the opportunity to heal while he's not in the same shadow of Gotham].

While Tim isn't Robin, he does maintain some communication with YJ. It's more distant, but they still go on missions together (as long as word won't get back to Batman). Tim is also more of a traveling vigilante who steals money from Lex or other billionaires to fund Tim's night job (he, begrudgingly, doesn't attempt to steal from Bruce. Babs would catch him). Tim also pockets some of the cash from crimes (particularly if the cops are corrupt and the money wouldn't go towards good causes regardless). Maybe Tim remotely manages DI as well, maybe not.

Anyways, years later, the batfam is slowly starting to heal. Jason is starting to forgive Bruce. The old man is putting in the effort to heal their relationship. Damian is healing and bonding with all of the family members in his own way. Dick has a much better relationship with Bruce, and Steph feels accepted by them.

Then Bruce "dies."

Tim stumbles upon proof of Bruce through his travels. He doesn't trust the Bats (especially after at least a year of no contact with them), so he tries to tell them about his proof as a not well-known vigilante. Red Hood has worked with him when The Outlaws crossed paths with him, but they aren't at the stage where RH trusts him. Tim doesn't trust RH due to a conversation or two about the man's hatred of the third Robin.

The Bats, drowning in their grief, push Tim away and deny him.

It stings, but Tim convinces himself to just shrug. What would he expect from the Bats anyways?

Tim goes through the effort of bringing Bruce back by himself. He then tries to dip immediately afterwards. He wants nothing to do with the Bats.

The Bats become curious about why a vigilante who seems to dislike would risk and sacrifice so much to bring back Bruce. They, like the nosy shits they are, try to investigate, charm, and stalk Tim.

Tim wants nothing to do with those fuckers. He wants to be left alone, fucking hell.

This dissolves into Tim trying to stay the fuck away from the Waynes as they chase him. He also can't help the fact that he cares about them, even if they piss him off.

More secrets unravel. Tim, wanting them to just go the fuck away, admits he knew the third Robin and that's why he doesn't like them.

Tim has changed a ton (personality and looks [he's taller and changes his appearance with makeup/wings]) so they don't immediately think of him as the third Robin. Tim also maintains a spotless civilian cover.

This cues the other Bats starting to question each other and Bruce what the fuck happened to the third Robin to make someone else hold a grudge against them.

I got so distracted. Oh well. Imma have to watch that series to feel the pain you're chatting about ^^ I wanna immerse myself in it, lmao

[lostintransist]

Guys I saw a fic idea yesterday (I for the life of me cannot find it so if you know who is was please tag them) but the idea was basically that toxic!Ghost and his ex-girlfriend are still in love but she won't be with him because again TOXIC but Ghost keeps showing up to argue with her and then take her to bed.

But anyway my brain went mmmm don't like that let's make it so ex-girlfriend is truly done like calls in a friend with a shotgun to keep Ghost away kind of done.

CW: violence threatened, bad friendship interactions

He knocks like a cop, all force and meaty part of his fist pounding, rattling the door in its frame. You look at your friend. Tears have started to well in her eyes.

"Please," she whispers, "He's right there."

"Absolutely not. You asked me to come over to keep you honest, you want to be done with him. That can't change because he hate fucks like a deity." You point one stern finger at her, brows pulled tight, "You stay here."

The pounding knock comes again as you grab your salt loaded shotgun from the guest bed. Grip firm with your right hand you level the gun as you swing the door open. He had been slamming his fist into again.

Dark pits for eyes meet yours above a dark balaclava. He lifts a single brow with the slightest tilt of his head. He steps across the porch to stand at the stairs.

"Interesting."

His voice doesn't rumble the way you expect it to. It's still deep but not as deep as his frame would suggest.

"She's done. Now leave." You center the shotgun on his chest.

"I'd like to check that," he steps to the side as if to move around you.

Tracking his moment you tsk at him.

"I know you military types have issues with women and authority but I would happily spend a few nights in jail for putting some holes in you."

He takes another step forward. Forcing the barrel up and to the left you fire off a round into the night before centering on his body again. Once your gaze is locked with his you rack the next round into place.

His hands drift up from his sides. No fear is in his eyes, only cool calculation.

"I will be here all night, so don't even try it."

A moment of silence stretches like taffy between you.

"You handle that well." He is referring to the gun.

"I hunt dick, I mean deer for fun." He doesn't miss your intentional word slip.

At some point that you can't determine he decides. Standing tall he drops both hands to his pockets, turns and whistles as he walks back into the dark. You don't move from your guarding position until you hear the throaty roar of a motorcycle fade into the distance.

Stepping inside you close and lock the front door before breaking the gun open to remove the ammo. Your friend comes tearing around the corner crying.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you. I don't know what you did but thank you. I love him but I finally feel free?" She throws her arms around you in a hug you can only half return because one arm is still full.

"You need to move, like by the end of the week. I'll help you get movers scheduled."

She squeezes you hard once before stepping back to wipe her eyes.

"Want some wine while we look at options closer to work?"

"God yes. Let me put this away and I'll meet you in the kitchen."

Time passes, yada yada yada. The friendship changes so that you are hardly speaking when the wedding invitation arrives. But you're free that day and drop it in your calendar.

She hadn't invited you to the ceremony. No big deal, while you missed the friendship she wasn't a great friend after you forced her ex boyfriend to leave her alone. You almost wonder if you are associated with him now in her mind, hence the distance.

You were surprised to find her ex among the crowd at the reception. Clocking him you made a point to avoid him. He caught you though, halfway into your wine taking a breather from the air that had turned muggy under the tent.

"You look good tonight."

Closing your eyes you took a deep breath.

"I look good every night, what's the point?"

He stepped up beside you.

"I'm looking for a -"

"Let me stop you right there," you cut him off. "Micro dosing poison will still kill a person. I've heard, repeatedly, how you are. If you want to have a shot at this conversation? Go the fuck to therapy and work through your issues."

With that you turn and stride inside, dropping your wine off at the bar you make your goodbyes and slip away into the darkness.

He finds you eight months later at a coffee shop. You had been listening to music when the chair across from you slides out and a ghost from the past settles into it. He slides a business card across the table to you.

Moving on headphone you give him your best 'the hell do you want' look.

"That's the contact info for my therapist," he taps twice on the card with a finger. "She has permission to speak to you about how I'm doing."

"And why would I want to do that?" You ask archly.

"Because you're interesting, and interested."

"Am I?"

"My number is on the back," he taps the card one more time before standing and leaving you bewildered and, unfortunately, the teensiest bit interested.

Masterlist

[burningcheese-merchant]

Sooo, I have a thought from an ask i saw about yandere beasts towards the ancients...

What if the Beasts became yandere towards YOU instead?

Although, the Ancients have the same feeling too, which may lead to high tensions in the air.

What would YOU in that scenario?

-A Self-Aware/Yandere lover Anon

Wait, me? Me specifically? Merchant? The person answering this ask? That's certainly an interesting thought...

If the Beasts became yanderes towards me, then I would fucking panic lol. I don't condone this kind of behavior irl, it's fun to write fictional crazy people but nobody wants to endure ACTUAL crazy people. Stalkers are sick and dangerous and need to be put away, and it's a damn shame it's not taken seriously by law enforcement anywhere (not until it escalates to violence, anyway, unfortunately)

With that said, let's terrorize Merchant for a little bit

IF THE BEASTS ARE STILL JUST COOKIES:

Step on them immediately, they're like 3 inches tall wait, would that work? They have powers and are crazy strong. What can they actually do against humans? Would stepping on them just break my fucking foot?

Send my dog after them no wait, I don't want them to hurt my dog. I love my dog very much. I don't know what I'd do if something happened to him. I'd never forgive myself if I let him try to eat them and he just got turned into flour or something

Pour milk on them ONE OF THEM IS MADE OF MILK ALREADY GODDAMN IT

Hide the box of cookies I like to get from the store, because they probably wouldn't appreciate the fact that I love to eat cookies (they're just like this 🍪 but still)

Try to trap them in the fridge momentarily, hope they don't destroy my nice fridge

Make a deal where they are allowed to live in and explore my house provided they damage nothing and hurt no one

Give them head scratches (especially Spice, his head looks Very Scratchable)

Give them tiny little kisses if they behave themselves (however, if I give one a kiss, I have to give them ALL kisses, or else the other 4 will retaliate against me out of jealousy)

I will also allow them to sit on my shoulders if they behave themselves and don't try to yank on my hair or my ears or something

Wait, do cookies know what sex is? Are they capable of sexual feelings? If so, how do they deal with them? Do they have the... equipment for that? WHAT IF THEY TRY TO HUMP MY FINGERS OR SOMETHING OH GOD-

Contact federal authorities and hope that they believe me when I say superpowered talking cookies are in my house, so they can come take them away and perhaps experiment on them

Probably never sleep again because there's a batch of little satanic cookies in my house that all want to fuck me for some reason (I'm ugly and a normie, wtf did I do to deserve this 💀)

IF THE BEASTS ARE HUMAN:

immediate death

panic x10000000000

I hc Spice as being at least 6'5''/198cm and 200+/90+ lbs/kg so I'm cooked 7 ways to Sunday just with him

Seriously I'm just a short nerd irl. Assuming they still have their powers, my life is literally over

Do everything in my power to convince them all my loved ones are dead so they don't go harm them out of jealousy (ESPECIALLY my SO, God have mercy, I'll probably have to tell him to go hide in his home country for a while)

Try to barricade myself in a church, hope that the "demons cannot set foot on hallowed ground/in God's house" rule applies to them, beg God to save my sorry ass while they try to break in and drag me back out

Can't call the cops because A) stalking and harassment are not taken seriously by police, B) they won't believe me when I say that 5 supervillains are trying to kidnap and marry me, C) by the time they realize I'm telling the truth, they will already have been hanged/put into a coma/beheaded/turned to flour/cut up into salt cubes

I actually only like men irl so I am in deep trouble with Flour and Sugar especially

Try to flee the country (probably won't work but I'll try anyway and hope they don't get too mad about it), hide out in the Yukon or some bumfuck nowhere village in Russia, I'd rather face a polar bear than these guys

Probably still be forced to let them live in my house in exchange for peace and obedience

...I don't know if tiny head scratches and kisses would cover it this time

Hope that they're all possessive enough to only harass me one at a time, instead of... more than one at a time, because that counts as sharing and yanderes don't really like doing that

Try to pit them against each other constantly. If they're too focused on arguing about who I belong to or whatever, then they can't focus on tormenting me

Would like to try to stab or shoot them but idk if conventional weaponry works on them at all

If I HAD TO pick one to say yes to, it would be Burning Spice. He is sexy af. Then, hopefully, I can weaponize this and get him to defend me from the others

IF THE ANCIENTS LIKED ME TOO, BUT WERE NORMAL:

Yay, sanity. I'll tell them to PLEASE get the Beasts away from me. They can sort out whatever they feel towards me later, we've got a bigger problem on our hands than that

COOKIES: I will keep them safe in my house under the same conditions as the Beasts: behave and do not harm anyone or anything

HUMANS: Look, can I just... send them back? How did any of these guys get here, anyway? Can I please just shove them back through the portal or whatever they used to get here? Even if I wasn't taken, I don't think I'd have the strength or patience to put up with anyone's shit. Can we just be friends? I'd love to be friends. I need a mom friend like Hollyberry in my life

If necessary, I am picking Dark Cacao. Seriously, I love my big, strong men. Merchant is a basic bitch at heart lol

IF THE ANCIENTS WERE YANDERES TOO:

Are you fucking kidding me

Am still picking Cacao, fuck all of you

[angel-in-shibari]

older stronger abusive sadistic cellmate gf:

"if you scream, they're just gonna send you to Ad Seg for your 'protection'. so don't even bother, dumbass"

"hey dumbass, you still didn't pay me back for the coffee I gave you yesterday. you better pay up now. I don't care if your commissary account is empty. I guess you'll just hafta pay me back... another way~"

"oh yeah? what're the guards gonna do? I ain't scared of them. I can pin you against the wall and they won't give a shit"

"showering by yourself? how do you know someone won't try to shank you in the bathroom? no, you need my protection. of course I'm getting naked. we're taking a shower together, baby girl."

"nope. you don't get the top bunk. or the bottom bunk either. you sleep on the floor. I don't care if it's freezing cold concrete. bitches like you don't deserve to sleep on a bed"

"shhhhh don't yell, dumbass. I stole a guard's handcuffs. don't worry, you're fine. I just cuffed you to my bunk. awww, poor baby. don't cry. just go back to sleep. lemme play with you a bit longer"

"so you get out in a few weeks? damn. I still have 40 months left. that sucks. I bet you're gonna miss me. or... here's a thought. what if you stayed here longer? you'd want that, wouldn't you baby girl? of course you would. you'd do anything I say. right? yeah, that's what I thought. so go ahead and punch that guard over there right in her dumb face. because I told you to, that's why! don't you wanna stay with me? then do what I fucking told you to! I don't care if you think you're throwing away your life by staying here. I've seen the way you worship me. I know how obsessed you are with me. trust me, I'm way better than any one else on the outside. who would even want you anyway? an ex-con, a criminal, a dyke, a complete fucking pushover. are you seriously gonna let everyone walk all over you for the rest of your life? or are you going to do what I tell you to?"

"wow, I can't believe you actually did that! and you got 5 years added to your sentence? that's hilarious! yeah, so funny thing... I actually lied about my own sentence. I didn't have 40 months left. I actually only have four. hey, but it's okay. after I'm gone, I'm sure you'll get another cool cellmate. hopefully someone who won't try and kill you the first chance they get. what.... you love me? jeez, when did you get all sentimental all of a sudden? hey, it's not my fault! I didn't think you'd actually do it. I was just playing around. it's your own fault for believing me. haven't you learned by now, baby girl? you can't let people push you around and tell you what to do. it doesn't matter if it's cops, your boss, or even people you think you love. you're such a dumbass. and to think you were originally in here for just 14 months because of a stupid drug possession charge. you really threw away your life because you wanted to be with me? that's so fucking pathetic."

"oh stop fucking crying, dumbass. it's not the end of the world. hey, maybe when you get out in five years, we can meet up and get coffee or something? okay, that's enough. now you're just making me feel bad. I told you already, it's your own fault. okay, you know what? I know Officer Smith. I can probably bribe her to drop the charge and get your original release date back. but only if you do something for me. strip. I said 'strip', dumbass. yes, get naked, right here right now. I don't care if anyone sees us. now on your knees. aww that's just adorable. look at you. no, shut up. puppies don't talk. they bark. so bark for me puppy. I said bark! awww that's perfect. you're nothing but a dog. you're just my prison bitch, are you? awww, so pathetic. you'd do anything I tell you to. take my pants off. that's right. good girl. underwear too. nope, stop. don't use your hands. use your teeth. awww, good puppy. so good at obeying me. eat me out. you heard me. what, did you seriously think you were just gonna stare at me? you're such a fucking dumbass. if you're asking me for a favor, you need to give me something first. you've been in prison for almost 14 months. how do you not know this already? fucking dumbass. eat me out, now. oh, god.... that's so good. you've got a killer tongue, puppy. you feel so fucking good. isn't this embarrassing? just the thought that anyone could look into our cell, and see you naked and on your knees, eating me out like the pathetic little bitch you are? isn't that just so fucking hot? oh, fuck! don't stop! keep going, bitch! stop fucking struggling! I don't care if you can't breathe! you'll breathe once I cum! keep going! don't stop! don't stop! don't... fuck! holy fuck! wow... okay.... just....... wow......... good girl. good puppy. you did such a good job. get up on the bunk. come snuggle with me, puppy. you did so good. you're such a good little puppy for me. thank you. you were amazing. okay, fine... I'll talk to Officer Smith, and get her to reduce your sentence. on one condition. once you get out, you better wait for me. you hear me? I got four months left, and I don't want any other dykes tryna take you from me, ya hear? you're mine. no one else's.

wow okay this started out as a dumb meme thing but ended up becoming a whole fucking story. okay then... lmao. I might fix this up and post it as a script to GWA or something. anyway, hope you liked this lmao!

[orange-imagines]

Mud Dogs x Sick Reader

Relationship: Platonic

A/N: *blows dust off my keyboard* Uh hey guys. Fancy seeing you all here! Anyway I'm feeling blehhh and I've been thinking about the mud dogs a lot lately, so here you go have this for free <33 Also if you have mud dogs requests, send em in! Will I get to them? Who could possibly know. But reqs are open all the same

Well, they don't like seeing you miserable, that's for sure.

None of them are really used to dealing with this kind of thing. Sure, they all have experience being around people who've been sick and sometimes even helping with it depending on who the person was, but since taking up a life of crime they've gotten a bit rusty. They're way better at patching up the cuts and bruises you all get from your various missions and heists, but taking care of someone who's just caught a bug or has invisible pain going on? It's not their strong suit. But that doesn't mean they don't still try.

Danny's the best at looking after you by far. While he might make a joke here or there, he's the least likely to get on your nerves, and the most likely to make you a warm beverage and a hot meal unprompted. He looks after Len and Mick enough when they overwork themselves or go too far on a job that he has a good understanding of what you need: time, rest, and peace and quiet (the latter said while he glares at your other two friends). I take back all my generalization, actually- he's not a bad caretaker at all! He'll stop by your room/your spot on the couch and ask how you're doing and if you're feeling up for accompanying them on some task, and he'll sit with you and rub your back and let you complain about how bad you feel if you want to. He keeps as many worries as possible off your plate, and encourages you to rest as much as you can. He doesn't care if you're all actively being hounded by the cops (which you probably are), he just says "that ain't for you to worry about. Go take your meds and lay down". While he may come across as stern, he really just wants you to feel better. He doesn't like seeing anyone he cares about in pain.

Leonard is brash and can be quite loud and irritating when the others are involved, but when left alone with you he's way softer than he is on a daily basis. He won't baby you, but he's way more likely to do what you ask of him without complaint (holding things for you, getting up and getting you stuff, microwaving lunch, changing the channel to something he normally would never watch). If you want to vent about how bad you feel, he's your man. To him, your pain is something he can shit-talk with you about ("That fucking sucks. Why's your body doing this? This guy bothering you? Next time someone sneezes on you, tell me. I'll take care of them"), and he's only a little bit serious. He'll continue on with the bit if it makes you laugh- actually, there's little he won't do to try and lighten your mood, so if the two of you have any embarrassing/silly inside jokes that you want him to recreate or a funny voice you want him to do, this is the time. He'll deny you for a few minutes, but he's super easy to sway when you're sick. I hope Danny and Mick were there to see him do some cheesy shit to make you feel better. The big softie. They'll never let it go.

Mickey's just a pure wild card here, god help you. It's not like he's bad, he's just a bit chaotic because he really wants to fix whatever's going on with you, and gets impatient when he realizes there's nothing either of you can do but ride it out. He's very good about reminding you take any meds or painkillers you need though, and he comes up with a lot of other ways to ease your discomfort. Anything that usually helps you, he's down to do, no joke. He'll be your body pillow or heating pad or wrap his arms around your face if you have a headache. He cares the least about the possibility of you getting him sick and will be in your space and company as much as you want him to, though if you're feeling touch adverse you may have to shoo him away. If he's pestering you, feel free to tell him you're annoyed- he's got thick skin and knows you love him, so he won't take it to heart. He's a good sport.

Mick's also the most likely to procure mystic medicine for you, not realizing the potential negative effects that could have on a human, especially when a few of his medicines definitely came from the black market.

"Yeah I'm sure Y/N would appreciate this crazy plant I got. Funny that it's making my arm all tingly." "C'mon Mick for fuck's sake-"

I won't lie, it's not the most ideal situation you could be in. The guys' lives are chaotic and messy and often lacking in common physical comforts. But they always look out for you when you need it. Them having your back doesn't just apply to high-stakes cons and heists, they're there for you 24/7 (no matter how much beauty sleep they might lose). You're part of their messy little family, and they'll always do their best to take care of you, even if they might be lacking in a few areas.

[mids-stupid-shit]

This was mostly made for @rabid-raccoontail but whoever wants to get into Mortal Kombat, this is your lucky day. So welcome everyone to the

Idiots guide to Mortal Kombat

Also this is going to be my biggest post yet so if you like to read this is the place for you. If you can't picture the characters I name, look them up on google.

Also this contains heavy spoilers for the ENTIRE series.

So sorry for the wait, I hope you enjoy this

What is a Mortal Kombat?

To get a basic understanding of the series you got 3 canons to work with. You have the Midway games (Original Dev team), you have The NRS reboot (the canon most people are known with) and you got the The New Era ( the one that changed it all).

Classic games

The first game takes place on an Island owned by Shang Tsung, the final boss. The whole premise of why everyone is fighting on an island is because of the Mortal Kombat tournament, which happens every generation, and is a tournament mostly against Earthrealm and Outworld. Basically how it works, is if your realm wins 10 tournaments in a row, your realm gets fused with the winners (but also you can choose not to do that because fuck it). Outworld won 9 tournaments and with this one, one of the biggest villains of the franchise, Shao Kahn, fuses Earthrealm with Outworld and fucks up the entire human race. Our champions, Liu Kang a Shaolin monk, Johnny Cage the actor and Sonya Blade a Special Forces Commander, led by the thunder God Raiden won't let that shit slide. Oh also Kano is here and he's a proper Aussie, ye m8? Anyways, Liu Kang sweeps the floor with everyone, including a four armed hurdling mass of muscle named Goro, kicks Shang Tsungs ass and practically saves the Earth. Bonus fun fact, Scorpion kills Sub Zero because he thought he killed his family and clan and as revenge, he spit roasts him.

MK2 takes place some time after that with Shang looking a little sexier and asking the Earthrealmers to join a second MK tournament. If they don't oblige, they're gonna invade Earth (save that for a little later). Also Sub Zero is back, except not really the one who got killed by Scorpion was Bi-Han, and this is his younger brother, Kuai Liang. Getting back on topic we got some new characters like Jax, Sonya's partner from the Special Forces, Kuai Liang Sub Zero, Kung Lao who's the cooler Shaolin monk and also has a hat that's also a throwing weapon, Kitana, who is the main villains step daughter (sorta), Mileena, who's a test tube baby made by Shang Tsung for Shao Kahn, Reptile, who as you could guess is a lizard, and Barraka, who has Nosferatu's face (but also like, his species is tied to Mileena's creation because she's half Tarkatan. Anyways, some shit happens and Liu Kang beats the fuck out of Shao Kahn.

MK3, instead of being yet another tournament, Shao Kahn says FUCK IT and invades earth with the Outworld armies. Not only that, but the Lin Kuei (Sub Zero's clan) are being turned into cyborgs. All but one of them escaped, that one being Sub Zero. One cop survives New York, Johnny Cage gets killed by a centaur, there's a speedster with swords and fireballs coming out of his face, and boom, bang BING, we got some new characters. There's Stryker the Cop I talked about a few seconds ago, Kabal the speedster because the co-creator really wanted to make a psycho killer flash, Cyrax Sektor and Smoke who are the cyber Lin Kuei, Rain, who appears in like 5 games but only does something in 3 and isn't playable in one of the games he's in, Night Wolf who's a native American, Ermac who uses they/them and Sindel, the biggest bitch in the fucking seven seas. Oh also Bi-Han is back and he's edgy. He now goes by Noob Saibot, which if you read backwards is Tobias and Boon, the creators of Mortal Kombat. No time for that though because somehow Shao Kahn returned after being fisted, Johnny Cage gets brought back to life and Liu Kang kills Shao Kahn once more again, the end.

If that's not confusing enough, we aren't done yet because now we got

3D games

I'm not doing Mortal Kombat 4

Deadly Alliance starts with Shang Tsung and his boyfriend Quan Chi snapping Liu Kang's neck so he can't interrupt them in reawakening Onaga, the king of all scalies and one of the most powerful forces in the realms. And now Liu Kang is a zombie, Raiden kicks Shang and Quan's asses or at least tries. Also we're introduced to Kenshi Takahashi the blind swordsman with a magic sword, and sexy vampire pirate lady, Nitara, more on her later.

Deception takes place right after that, where Raiden is trying to fight the Deadly Alliance (who are literally just Shang and Quan), failing. Raiden dies, Quan Chi kills Shang Tsung which somehow awakens Onaga. Quan can't do piss and trying to fight him, somehow brings both Raiden and Shang Tsung back to life... Okay?? And then Raiden nukes himself and Onaga walks it off. Deceptions protagonist is a little shit called Shujinko, a student of Bo Rai Cho, the same man who trained Kung Lao and Liu Kang. He then gets encountered by Damashi, a glowy ball that tells him he has to help the Elder Gods by retrieving the Kamidogu (which are basically Jewelry that hold the fabric of the universe). And Shujinko, being the gullible idiot he is accepts. And from this point on, the game turns into you fixing everyone else's problems like finding Bo Rai Cho's sodding watch, getting water back from another realm, and beating the shit out of Wesley Snipes. Speaking of Blade we got other sick characters like Kira and Kobra, Black Dragon members and one of them is named after a martial art/movie, Havik who is a klerk of chaos, Hotaru the Policemun, Dairou who's an outlaw loose and runnin', and Li Mei, voiced by Kelly Hu in the latest game. After all that, you find all the Kamidogu, you defeat everyone + Scorpion is the final boss (don't ask me, I don't fuggin know why) and what's your reward? Realizing you've been deceived the whole game and not seeing a final battle between Onaga and Shujinko (even though Shujinko can definitely beat Onaga but fuck it).

Armageddon begins with this schmuck named Argus, an Edenian God who did it with a mortal woman Delia and they had two boys who had to be put in stalagmites because Argus knows the apocalypse is on its way. Thousands of years later, Daegon and Taven, the two brothers wake up. Daegon basically made the Red Dragon clan, named after Caro who's basically Taven's spirit animal and he helps bring about the apocalypse. Taven's character can be summed up to "Who are you? Who's that? Uuuuh..." But that's what I love about him. Anyways, Taven looks for his asshole brother, de-frosts a bad bitch and kicks everyone's ass. Which translates to what Armageddon really is. All the characters choose sides. We get one of the coolest fmv sequences in PS2 history and everyone dies trying to take Blaze's power. Blaze is a demigod-esque creation made by Argus to warn Taven and Daegon about the apocalypse, but also whoever kills him, gains his power and basically becomes the developer of the game. But because Taven is the main character, he has to kill everyone he encounters, a few of those people being one's he was proud to call friends. He climbs to the top, kills Daegon, destroys Blaze and saves the universe, the end.

Yeah I lied lol

Netherrealm Era

After Armageddon, Midway shut down, Warner Brothers bought Mortal Kombat and Netherrealm studios took over the franchise and this is where it all went downhill.

Mortal Kombat 9 starts with the end of the previous game. Except it doesn't, because Taven is somehow not here and Shao Kahn walked all the way back to kill him after being carried away by Onaga. Before Shao Kahn crushed him, Raiden sends a message to his past self saying only three things. "He Must Win.". We are now in the first Mortal Kombat except it's HD and Johnny is down bad for Sonya. Sonya is here just so she can find Jax who's lost on the island somewhere, Bi-Han is a bit of a prick and Shang Tsung is the only character in the game who has common sense. Liu Kang beats Shang Tsung, Jax gets his arms ripped off by Ermac, Johnny only gets to win if he has a suit and Mileena gets the most revieling outfit in fighting game history. Kitana and Liu Kang have an on and off thing, Reptile gets bullied (poor thang) and before Kuai Liang can kill Scorpion for killing his brother, he's taken away by the cyber Lin Kuei because Raiden saved Smoke from being cyberized and he says there's nothing he can do (that's bullshit but okay). Anyways, Kung Lao is doing pretty good in the tournament and then Shao Kahn snaps his neck. Feeling horrible by the death of his Shaolin brother, Liu Kang jumps in the arena and fists Shao Kahn. Sometime later, we learned that Shao Kahn survived because they put him in the Soul Chamber, a place in the Outworld arena that heals any and all wounds. He then gets the idea by Quan Chi to invade Earthrealm which completely goes against the laws of Mortal Kombat. And Shang Tsung knows and wants to stop them, but Shao Kahn doesn't fucking care and erased him from existance. they get guns from Kano, and they start blasting. Army can't do shit and somehow, a single cop (Stryker) is able to fight off A lizard man, a fire breathing cat and the only thing in Outworld that knows what pronouns are. Kabal was here too, but only for the first two fights. But he doesn't get his super speed here because he's just an average dude and maybe dating Stryker? I don't know. Anyways Kabal gets roasted by a big buff cat, taken to the Black Dragon and given a respiratory device by Kano that helps him breathe. He's basically Deadpool - the guns + super speed because the magic atmosphere of Outworld gave him that. Don't ask how anyone else got that after going to Outworld, idk🤷‍♀️. Anyways Quan Chi and Bitch-han bring back Sindel and mind control her to do their biding. Meanwhile, our heroes that consist of Johnny Cage, Sonya Blade, Jax Briggs, Night Wolf, Cyber Sub Zero, Smoke, Kitana, Stryker, Kabal, Kitana and Liu Kang sit and do nothing. The Bastard Sektor walks in and with his Cyber Lin Kuei to tire out the heroes until Sindel arrives, the worst scene in MK history plays because the purple bitch kills damn near everyone and kicks Smoke in the nads, and then Night Wolf, the most forgettable Mortal Kombat character kills Sindel by Hail Mary. Raiden looks for help of Quan Dale Dingle, but he instead of helping, brings everyone who died back as revenants, which are basically zombies but with memories of the ones who died and they are pretty strong. Raiden fights three at once, Kills Liu Kang because he fears Shao Kahn is going to kill him and with the power of the Elder Gods, Raiden goes super Saiyan and does a Kamehameha, killing Shao Kahn. Yeah all of that was one game.

Mortal Kombat X (or as dip shits would call it mk 10) starts with Johnny, Sonya and Kenshi fighting revenant Sub Zero (who's a human revenant because of MKX prequel comic nonsense don't worry about it), Smoke who isn't even playable, Sindel who's a bitch through and through and Jax, who in a minute turns back into a human because of unexplained reasons, but I guess by killing his revenant, Liu, Kitana and Lao who are some. it turns out they were going to the Jin Sei chamber (earthrealm's life force that is pure light) where Quan Chi and his boss, Shinnok exact their plan of taking over Earthrealm by putting Shinnok into the Jin Sei, corrupting it and turning him into a super Saiyan but he looks like a devil, so kind of like a ssj4 thing? Doesn't matter because Johnny learns he has God killing powers and uses them to punch Shinnok in the nuts. Raiden seals him and the rest of the game is now a 20 years time skip. And now we have the next gen of kombatants, called the Kombat Kids by the fans. You got Cassie Cage the mc, Jaqui Briggs, who's basically Jax 2.0, Kung Jin, Lao's cousing who fights with a bow and Takeda, who has whips, bombs and a fuckin lightsaber. Anyways other new characters you have are Kotal Kahn who took over the throne, Erron Black who is the Cowboy and D'vorah, a character that absolutely everyone hates because she kills Mileena, who had a civil war with Kotal for the throne. Also Scorpion, now Hanzo Hasashi kills Quan Chi after learning it was him who disguised himself as Bi-Han to kill the Shirai Ryu out of spite I guess? D'vorah betrays Kotal, Almost kills Johnny but does get wrecked by Cassie who does also have the same God killing powers as Johnny, and he uses them to punch Shinnok in the nuts. Raiden puts himself in the Jin Sei Chamber because Shinnok corrupted it. Raiden purifies the Jin Sei and everyone gets a happy ending. Except Shinnok, who gets decapitated by dark Raiden.

Mortal Kombat 11 is a flawed masterpiece, and that flaw is the multiverse bullshit. So basically, Shinnok's mom Kronika who's like the keeper of time, wants to kill the entire universe because it's not balanced (shut the fuck up, ya bitch). Anyways, we got Geras, who can never die because he's a fixed point in time but is mostly known for pounding ass in the next game, Kollector who is the IRS and I hate him, and Centrion who is Shinnok's sister. There's also he Frozen bad bitch from earlier and her name is Frost, who is like Sub Zero minus but she's cyberized like Sektor and Cyrax who are in this game but unplayable (WHY NETHERREALM!). Anyways while remaking the timeline, Kronika accidentally summoned past versions of Liu Kang, Kitana, Kung Lao, Jade (who was dead but I didn't give a shit to introduce her at the start) and also she has maybe done it with Kotal (LITTERALY oc x canon shit) ((Also Jade doesn't kill D'vorah when given the chance, the stupid bitch)), Jax and a past version of Erron Black, even though he's still alive??, and also Shao Kahn with the coolest design of all time. Also Barraka is back, because I forgot to mention the bug bitch killed him too. Anyways, now we're spending the game beating up but rarely killing beloved characters. The cyber Lin Kuei and Frost and old Jax invade their ship that they use to get to Kronika's keep. Young Liu Kang dies, but Raiden fuses with revenant Liu Kang and that turns Liu Kang into a fake Gogeta, aka Fire God Liu Kang (any of this starting to sound like fanfiction?). Anyways they make it to the island where Kronika's keep is and then, everyone but Liu Kang gets Thanos snapped. Liu kills all the leveled up revenants, Glasses Kronika and brings back Raiden to help him rewrite history.

JUST KIDDING RETCONNED FUCK YOOPUUUUU HAHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAJ FUNNEE

uuuuuuugh alright I got two more story modes to do, holy fuck it's okay I can do this shit

The MK11 expansion, Aftermath, brings back Sheeva, who is now queen of the Shokan, the same species as Goro and Kintaro (the fire breathing cat from MK9), Night Wolf, Fujin the wind God and brother of Raiden, and Shanga langa ding dong. Fujin, Night Wolf and Shang were all locked away in a place beyond time until just now somehow (just roll with it okay? Okay). The plot of this story expansion is basically, Liu Kang wants to reset the universe, but he can't because he doesn't have Kronika's crown, which is needed to do the universe reset. So our boy Liu takes the two idiots and Shang into the past. I just now realized, Raiden is the only smart person in this game, because he knows Shang Tsung is planning something devious. Liu maybe knows but plays it off. They go back to previous points in the game to get the crown, revive Sindel who says she was mind controlled but later she says she's evil from the start (holy fuck I want to kill her and then myself). They get a boatsman, Kahron, to take them to the keep. In the process, D'vorah kills the poster boy of the franchise (Dominic I will fucking end your bloodline). Sindel gets Shao Kahn, heals his eyes that were sliced out by Kitana, they kill Liu and Lao, Shang reveals that he wants to reset the timeline (Fujin you stupid) , he Soul sucks Sindel and Shao Kahn, kills Kronika, but before he can do anything with Kronika's Hourglass, Liu Kang breaks in, kicks Shang Tsungs ass and reboots the series one more fucking time, which brings us to...

MORTAL 1 KOMBAT (or Mortal Kombat 1

This game starts with Shang Tsung being a failing snake oil salesman because he can barely survive. Then someone who looks like Kronika comes in and he makes this face

Best game of all time.

Anyway, we're introduced to Kung Lao and baby boy Raiden, who are farmers but also train Martial arts under the belt of Madame Bo, this universes version of Bo Rai Cho and she runs a kitchen, what more could you want with a grandma. Later, the Lin Kuei invade and we get the return of my boy Smoke who now has a Karambit and is voiced by Spiderman. He's Joined by Kuai Liang who is now Scorpion, and Bi-Han Sub Zero, the worst he's ever been i hate him. It's like they took his personality from Mortal Kombat 11 and slapped it over a poor man's imitation. Kung Lao kicks all three of their asses but only because they were pulling their punches. They join Liu who is basically Raiden now, and look for Johnny Cage, who's having a one-sided argument with his wife, and then she leaves and doesn't come back. Then, Kenshi breaks in, wanting Sento, the sword of his family which now lays on displayed on Johnny's wall. They fight, and Johnny beats him effortlessly. Johnny ties him to a chair and interrogates him until Liu Kang, along with Scorpion and Sub Zero walk in, which leads to one of the most iconic moments in the franchise

They want to untie Kenshi, but Johnny doesn't want that and thinks this is a prank, so he tries to play along but ends up being tossed into a million dollar statue, which triggers him and Johnny starts beating the shit out of Bitch-Han. Liu intervenes before Johnny can do his second fatality on him.they all go to the Wu Shi monk academy, where they train for the Great Tournament between Earthrealm and the realm of Outworld (that's LITTERALY what they call it, I'm not joking). Raiden beats them all using the one move he has, advance Cartwheel kick. Winning, Raiden is chosen to represent Earthrealm. And for winning, Liu Kang gives him a lightning amulet, which gives him lightning powers so he can fairly combat the Outworld fighters. Entering Outworld through a portal created by Liu, they are introduced by Kitana, Mileena and the palace guard, so-called the Umgadi, featuring two returning characters, one of which does nothing and the other was just a barrier. The one's i speak of are Khameleon and Tanya, the first canon lesbian in Mortal Kombat who has a thing going on with Mileena. Li Mei is back and... She's voiced by Kelly Hu. No wonder I forget she's in this game all the time. but along Li Mei, we have Shao Kahn, who is now degraded to General Shao, and his second in command, Reiko. I forgot to mention that Sindel is in this game and for the first time in the series, I don't mind her. She's a sweet, caring mother who is actually a mother to both Kitana and Mileena. Shao is now jobbing more than ever, from losing to a farmer, to being wrecked by queen. After winning the tournament, Liu Kang sends Kung Lao, Johnny and Kenshi to look for Shang Tsung, as it's word that he's somewhere in Outworld. The tremendous trio find a colony of Tarkatans, Outworlders infected by a disease called Tarkat, which deforms and debilitates. Shang Tsung is there and plans to harvest their marrow for a cure for Mileena, who as we find out, she has Tarkat. After a few fights, Kenshi pushes Johnny out of the way, as Mileena has gone feral, took some sais of the table, and stabs Kenshi's eyes out. As this happens Shao and tiny ass Goro walk in and take them to Shang Tsung's true lab, the Flesh Pits where Reptile works for him because Shang says he has his family captive. But as it's revealed, this isn't the case, as Shang already killed them many moons ago. This makes Reptile (aka Syzoth) have anger. They toxic gas the place and we get a Test Your Might to survive. They escape, but as they walk through the Living Forrest, they encounter Ashrah, a demon from the Netherrealm killing demons and almost killing our heroes. Also she says Demons funny. Like... DEE-MUNZ!

Anyways, she joins the party and they search for Quan Chi, who used to be dead, but is now an escaped cole miner and also black. The way Ashrah knows where Quan Chi is because she has a magic sword called the Kriss, and she uses it to purge evil from her soul, by killing other demons. We then find Quan Chi and his jobber squad consisting of Havik who is horribly lame in comparison to his older version and design from Deception, Sareena, Ashrah's so-so sister, Darius, aka Wesley Snipes' Blade with a dash of A-Train from the boys on the side, and the absolute dog shit tier downgrade of all time, Nitara is back, and nothing that made her cool is here. She isn't cool, her design is mid at best, her head looks like an onion, and the one thing that everyone hates about Nitara in this game, is that she's voiced by Megan Fox. Megan, Goddamn, Fox. Her performance is so goddamn awful that people actually prefer Rhonda Rousey's Sonya Blade from MK11. Anyways enough bitching, because Ashrah, with the help of a Reptile kameo beats the jobber squad, but just too late to stop Quan Chi from making a tornado of souls, which he uses to create Ermac, and then does this "who's mans is this" lookin' pose as he says kill them.

In between this and Ashrah vs Quan Chi and Ermac, Johnny thanks Kenshi for saving his life, and gives him Sento, which he uses to assist Ashrah in the clobbering of Quan Chi. Now they return to the streets of Outworld's capital, Sun Do to look for a way back home. They disguise themselves, run into the Umgadi, get away and now it's Li Mei's turn to shine.

I forgot everything that happens in her chapter.

The Lin Kuei infiltrate a palace where Shang Tsung is, but while they are terrible at being stealthy, they aren't in beating Shang and Quan. But In the process, Bi-Han admits he let his and Kuai's father die, just so he can be the Lin Kuei's grandmaster. Smoke waits outside and does nothing till Kuai Liang escapes. And when Bi-Han comes out and leaves a scar on Kuai's face, even then, Smoke does literally nothing. All the characters who had their own parts in the storyline + Mileena (as it's her time to shine). They head to the Fortress where Ermac almost rips off Bi-Han's arms, fight Ermac, but it turns out the soul of Mileena and Kitana's father, Jerrod is inside Ermac...

That came out wrong... Or did it?

Anyways, they break in, Kitana almost fools General Shao and Shang Tsung right before Shang Bang puts on a crown, that awakens the Dragon Kings army and a a fake Sindel kills the queen, but Jerrod, who is still in control of Ermac, takes her soul before it leaves her body, storing Sindel as a part of Mac n' cheese. They head all come to discover that it wasn't Kronika at the intro, but instead was Shang Tsung from another timeline where he won in MK11,

HOW

DO

YOU

DO

FELLOW

KIDS???!!!

Anyways, 11 Shang, who we will now call Titan Shang, has a plan to rewrite Liu Kang's timeline (the one everything else I just talked about in this entry takes place) and bring absolute fucking chaos with his team of evil time lords. Liu Kang, being the reasonable person he is, summons an army of good time lords and they all fight on the same pyramid that Armageddon's ending took place. For the first time in the entire series, you get to pick your own character for the finale. And based on the character you pick, you get a different variants of characters, most commonly fusions of already existing characters. Finally, you beat Shang and Quan, you get a thanks from Liu, and sent to Madame Bo's, where the Earthrealm heroes enjoy food and tea.

*HEAVY BREATHS*

So, that's the entirety of Mortal Kombat. Any questions?

[alicerosejensen]

Okay, this is my headcanon! But I think Leon needs a REGULAR civilian girl. I have nothing against Ada (I love that woman) but with Leon you can hit me a dozen times, I can't see her. Their relationship, in my understanding, is toxic. Leon is clearly tired of playing cat and mouse with Ada.

So, my main (and favorite) headcanon is that Leon's partner is still younger than him, and is a student at the College of Arts and Culture. Perhaps she knows how to play the piano or some ancient instrument (the lute? guitars are for wimps). If she knows how to shoot or Leon himself taught her this. Of course, she does not carry a gun with her, but a gas spray must be! Leon will remind her several times to keep it in her jacket pocket.

Her gun always pulls a bit to the left. But in reality it is not, she just shoots askew. But playfully blames Leon.

Leon teaches her how to properly hold a weapon, reload it, but sincerely hopes that this will never come in handy for her. (Besides, I'm just sure that Leon will definitely praise her if she hits the target. It can be nice words or a gentle kiss on the back of the head).

Fluffy Leon. He is very gentle with her, flirts a lot, sometimes even too much. Sometimes he says various smut, only to deliberately embarrass her. But he likes it when she starts to play along, although he likes reddening cheeks from embarrassment more. And no, Leon will not tell her about his work until the last. He does not want to endanger a dear person. Relations with him are also not easy, because Leon is a very reserved person: he is ready to lend a helping hand, but hates to accept it. So it's hard to know what's on his mind. And all if you knock on his "shell" a little, I'm sure that Mr. Kennedy would allow himself to be comforted by insignificant signs of attention. In addition, it certainly relaxes him, as his beloved talks about some historical person.

“Do you know Anne Boleyn? I recently read Alison Weir, "Anne Boleyn, a king’s obsession. Henry VII is just a big pig! He wanted a son, but in the end, his daughter became the Great Queen anyway! He didn't deserve any of his wives."

Leon is unlikely to listen carefully if he has just returned from a mission. Most of the time he will disappear into the bar emptying the stocks of whiskey, but if his mental state is stable, then he is really interested, but not always...

She is literally his sunshine! Unfortunately, when Leon is drunk, he can rudely push away (not physically. Raising a hand to his beloved is beyond impossible for him). He will definitely apologize the next morning, but will feel like a bastard for having snapped at his love. Even if she forgives him.

Tries to fix a mistake. A gift or help around the house... Leon understands that it's hard with him, understands that she can find another good guy, and he will let her go without problems, considering himself not the best option for her. Yes, it will hurt him, but if it's for the best, he'll understand. True, leaving him will be accompanied by another hard drinking.

"I don’t want to leave, but I don’t understand what is happening to you! You are very dear to me, it hurts me to see that you are ruining yourself, Leon!"

The words that at least someone needs him, not as a federal agent, but as a person will break him. Leon would hug her, bury his nose in the crook of her neck, and most likely let himself cry. He's fucking tired of B.O.O, he's always dreamed of having a family and helping people as a cop! His life shouldn't be like this!

Their sex balances on the verge of tenderness and rudeness. I don't think Leon has a fetish for choking, for example. He can grab him by the neck, but he won't squeeze. Suddenly he miscalculates his strength and causes harm ... nevertheless, he still dominates, although Leon is a giver, so he will make sure that his partner gets the highest pleasure from making love to him.

The agent reacts quite calmly when his girlfriend puts her leg on his hip. True, he doesn't like it when she takes up the entire bed, trying to push Kennedy to the floor in his sleep. Sometimes she can be very active in this.

He's fought B.O.O., zombies, and more, but he doesn't always manage to stay on his bed at night. Because this woman prefers to take everything.

The couch is also comfortable.

"Why were you sleeping on the couch?

Leon will come up with some kind of go-ahead, but will not tell the truth

Nothing strange, just a man with the last name of the president lost a bed to his girlfriend.

I think because of the age difference, Leon is afraid to marry his girlfriend. To be more precise, he is afraid that she will become a target for his enemies. If something happened to her through his fault, he would never forgive himself for it. And let the D.S.O shove all the programs to protect the relatives of their agents up their ass (I hope they have such)

If an outbreak of a new virus occurs again, Leon will climb even to hell for his beloved. He's already protected Ashley from the ganado and Las Plagas, so keeping his beloved safe from the new stuff will be a priority for him. Leon is trained to deal with this, but she is not, but this does not mean that she will not hit the zombies with a tire iron or a bat in order to protect herself, but once again she will not stick out from behind Leon's back. But she may have to take a few shots, which is unlikely to kill the zombies.

"You have to shoot right in the head."

"This is my friend! You SHOT my friend! He... he... I could..."

"He's not human anymore."

"HE WAS MY FRIEND! Who gave you the right to kill people?!"

Yeap, she fired first, but...Leon realizes it's just a shock. He didn't tell her anything about where he actually works, so her fear is entirely justified. The gun she found will be in his holster, and he will carefully make his way with her through this shit to leave her in a safe place.

Hit a zombie in the head with a tire iron when he wants to attack Leon from behind? She has courage. Maybe she's not a spy like Ada; she doesn't look like Helena or Claire, but she tries her best to hold on even if she has nightmares afterwards.

Some riddles can be solved faster than Leon. Need to quote Kafka or remember an important historical date? Next to Leon is a walking encyclopedia. Play a couple of chords? Problematic, but not critical.

She is his sunlight... or the light from a flashlight. Leon's lantern broke, so...

"Please don't shine in my eyes, baby." "I'm Sorry."

Leon will have to say goodbye to his leather jacket, but it's a joke, he'll give it to her himself.

They will walk this path together. Most likely, Leon will leave her in a safe place, thinking that she does not need a relationship with him. Most importantly, he saved her life.

-Hey, Mr. John Wick, - Leon turned around in confusion at a face stained with someone else's blood, where a tired smile bloomed. - Will you teach me how to suplex when you get back?

-Better we just take a hot shower together.

- I don't think I'll be going back to college any time soon, so I'll wait for you to come back. And I'm sorry about what I said to you on campus. I probably wouldn't have survived without you. Damn, I'd be torn to pieces.

- I understand.

- We'll talk calmly when it's over, right? I probably didn't know much about you. Will this end, Leon?

- Sure.

He'll be back, really. When he finishes off another bastard who has arranged a new outbreak of the virus.

[chasefaux]

the way vi was just so full of anxiety seeing the only living loved one she has so rapidly change into the exact opposite of what she liked about her, for what she fell in love with her – this maybe naive rich girl from the piltover, but someone who was just so kind and brave and understanding, and who was just so prepared to fight for the rights of the undercity in front of the council after only two days she's spent there– she had to see this girl switch into this controlling, cold-blooded, thirsty for revenge cop who has the privilege of not having to stop. and vi couldn't even be mad at her because she understood what it's like. to lose a parent. because she's lost at least three. so she kept her mouth shut and listened to her orders and let cait send to jail and endanger everyone. because she knew people can get angry and violent and act different when dealing with the emptiness death of a loved one brings you. vi punched her little sister, no? something she swore to never do and something she will forever regret, because that's what made jinx. the jinx that killed cait's mom and the jinx their mission is to eliminate and vi just feels so completely guilty.

and then in the tunnel, after they take a break because she can't handle the "new" cait anymore, the only pillar she now has, cait assures her that it's still her and promises vi that she won't change and kisses her which is something they probably hadnt done before and it confirms to vi that yes she is loved back by cait in the same way and as much as she loves her and that they are a pair, those two vs the injustice of the world they live in, just like during those two days, and vi's shoulders literally fall from being freed of so much worry and uncertainties and she lets her gloves hit the ground the ones she called the solution to all the problems up until now just so she could embrace her. and then it all goes horribly wrong, cait doesn't give two shits if vi's okay after the whole fucking room fell on them and vi can't understand how on earth could a revenge mean more to cait than a little kids life, it feeling like such a betrayal, a wake up call to vi, someone who would do the first and last for a kid in need, and when she confronts her all she gets is. "you're just like them". 'them' like the terrorists from zaun she called animals. that are on drugs and kill a mass of mourning people on the street. and then she adds that "she kept telling herself that you're different" so she had doubts about her for much longer and that no, those two weren't a pair and she doesn't see regular zauns like People but all as dangerous and disgusting and until then just thought of vi as if she was a separate category, not to be mixed in with those. that she's tired of pretending that vi's different and when vi calls her out on her obsessive behaviour she just. fucking hits her in her stomach. and vi ends up alone again trapped in that fucking room with no one to be by her side and no real reason to fight on any side of the war that will be, not for zaun because she no longer has a sister there she needs to protect and definitely no piltover, where no one fucking wants her, so she just 'waits it out' or fucking. quits. I'm sick. my chest hurts so bad

I can't even I knew it's gonna destroy me but I binge watched it anyway and now I'm trying to collect my thoughts because it's wayy past midnight and I need to go to sleep but I cantttt

[bpdbeehive]

Some quotes that are BPD coded (not exact, it's off memory)

"everything I am is somehow because of you and believe when I say I can't bear that" Master, from Doctor Who

"And we shall stand together on the earth as it burns" Master, from Doctor Who

"Become death, become me" Master, doctor who

"I love you, I really fucking love you, Nicole, if you asked me to kill someone I would, I wouldn't tell the cops shit" Emily, class of 09

"I'll rip her heart out and serve it to you on a silver platter" Emily, class of 09

"I don't care, I won't let you win, I'd rather let the entire world get destroyed before I let that happen" Catra, she-ra

"Go on, leave, just like everybody else" Catra, she-ra

"Do it, there's no one left in the whole world who cares about me" Catra, she-ra

"a monster, were they right? Has the dark in me finally come to light? A monster full of rage, nowhere to go but on a rampage" Elsa, Frozen

"Conceal, don't feel, don't feel" Elsa, Frozen

"I don't want you to date other girls, I'll kill them" Misa, Death Note

"please make me your girlfriend, I don't care if all you do is use me" Misa, death note

"Take it" after ripping her heart out, Angelique, Dark Shadows

"Is she prettier than me?" Myranda, game of thrones

"What type of girl do you like? Long hair? Short hair? I'll shape myself into anything you want me to be" Marika, Nisekoi

“I was practically dead, but you gave me a future. Yukki is my hope in life, but if it won’t come true then I will die for Yukki, and even in death I will chase after Yukki" Yuno, future diary

“To be perfectly honest, I really hate this guy. How could you have so much time for him when you couldn’t find a single spare moment for me? Why do you like him more than me anyway?” Megumi, Shiki

"I defeated Scott Pilgrim and she still wouldn't take me back" Matthew, Scott Pilgrim

"You were afraid? Good for you, all I wanted was for you to see me" Roxie, Scott Pilgrim

[minisugakoobies]

Burning Down | MYG

Pairing: Yoongi x Reader

Genre: smut, crack, DadYoongi!AU, BadCop!AU

Rating: M (18+)

Warnings: weapons - guns, switching POVs, angst!, allusions to murder, mentions of blood, references to war, allusions to choking, Yoongi is not a good guy (ymmv)

Word Count: 1.8k

Disclaimers: NSFW, obviously I don’t own BTS - they just inspire me

Summary: You're going to finish what you started. But Yoongi won't let you take it all away.

A/N: Everyone thank Yoongi for those recent D-Day concept photos, because they inspired me to write another chapter! I think we're closing in on the end here 👀

Unbeta’d as usual. I’d love to know what you think - my inbox is always open! 💕

Part 5 💵 Bad Cop Masterlist 💵 Part 6

The house is dark when you turn into the driveway. Tall trees on either side of the gravel pathway stretch endlessly into the cloudy morning sky, their thick canopies providing the car with cover from the rain that’s just starting to fall. 

Jungkook leans pretty heavily against you as you walk him to the door, and your knock is a little clumsy while you struggle to keep your partner on his feet. A light flickers on in the window, and then the door suddenly wrenches open from the inside. A rather handsome man peers down at where you’re slumped under Jungkook’s arm. 

“Holy shit, what the fuck happened?” 

Seokjin is not an agent. Seokjin is a former combat medic. You’d met years ago on a tour in a foreign land. He’d saved your back and you’d saved his, more than once. The blood you’d shed together had formed an inseparable bond between the two of you that meant more to you than your actual family. Which is why you’re here, in the middle of the night, holding a man who is slowly bleeding out all over his doorstep. 

“For fuck’s sake, come in, I just bought that mat.” Seokjin ushers the two of you inside, glancing around. His house is fairly secluded, the copse of trees bordering the property protecting him from prying eyes, but he’s been in enough battles to know that you can never be too cautious.

He leads you and Jungkook into his living room, ordering you to help your partner onto the couch. He disappears for a moment and returns with a first aid kit - not the kind you’d find at your local pharmacy but one meant for the battlefield. You don’t ask why he has one so readily available. You know what it’s like to be haunted by war; always prepared for the day those ghosts might return.

You also don’t ask why he happens to have a small freezer in his basement where he keeps bags of blood. After he’d retired from the armed forces, Seokjin had gone into private practice. You have no idea just how “private” that means, what type of clientele he might be stitching up, accepting payment under the table instead of involving insurance. Or cops. It might be your place to ask, considering you’re a federal agent, but right now you’re not about to look a gift horse in the mouth - not when Seokjin’s busy saving Jungkook’s life. 

Afterward, as Jungkook sleeps, blood slowly being transfused back into his strong body, Seokjin makes you some tea and he sits in the kitchen as you stand and sip, staring out the window at the rain. 

“Do you want to tell me what happened?” he asks gently, rubbing a hand over the scruff on his chin. You haven’t even apologized for waking him so early. 

“No,” you reply honestly, but then you tell him, as much as you can without compromising your mission. As if it hadn’t already gone to hell anyway. You talk and talk, and soon it’s not the details of the job you’re describing, soon it’s how things between you and Yoongi started, how they progressed, how they ended - in bullets and blood. 

Seokjin is quiet once you run out of words. He drums his long fingers on his placemat, watching the spoon resting there as it bounces from the rhythm. “Well, to be honest, that’s not the worst break-up you’ve ever had,” he drawls after a few seconds. 

“Fuck off,” you snap, but your lips twitch of their own accord. He’s not wrong. “It wasn’t a real relationship. It was all part of the plan.” 

“Is that so?” Seokjin levels you with a sober look. “Then why are you here, wearing a groove into my kitchen floor with your pacing, while your partner drains my last bag of O neg? Was that part of the plan, too?” When you don’t respond, he plows on. “Because it seems to me that you went a little too deep this time. Got a little too entangled. Would you say that’s accurate?” 

“Sir, yes sir,” you chirp sarcastically, saluting him with your middle finger. Seokjin’s eyes crinkle as he laughs, and for one brief second, you’re back in the field, joking with your friend, and not sitting in his house panicking while your mission goes up in flames. But then you hear Jungkook stirring in the other room, and Seokjin’s laughter fades as he rises to check on his patient. 

Seokjin, as always, is right. You’d gone too deep this time. Let yourself believe the lie. As much as you didn’t want to admit that you could be compromised, you knew the truth. You’d fallen for Yoongi, and now you had to clean up the mess you’d made, before anyone else got hurt. 

Even if it meant breaking your own heart.

Seokjin wanders back into the kitchen. “The transfusion is almost complete, but he’s gonna need to rest for a while longer.” 

“Can he - “

“He can stay here, that’s fine.” Seokjin looks so tired. You wonder how you must look. Probably about half dead. “But what are you going to do now? Call for backup?” 

You shake your head and reach into your satchel, pulling out the box from Yoongi’s safe. Inside, as you’d expected, lies a key. 

“No. I’m gonna finish what I’ve started.” Jimin’s face flashes through your mind and your vision goes red. And then Yoongi’s, and your heart pangs, even as you make your vow. “I’m gonna bring him down.” 

Yoongi hates this. 

He hates hiding. His safe house isn’t nearly as luxurious as his other house or the vacation home he’d just bought on the bay. Most of the rooms here are nearly empty, save for a random couch or table. Except for the one room that is fully stocked with guns and ammunition, along with a small safe stashed with emergency cash. But beyond that, the house is bare. It’s not meant to be a long-term residence, he knows, but he hates it anyway. 

He also hates not having his daughter with him. He’d called Da-som’s friend’s mother at dawn and told her that he had to go out of town for work suddenly and asked if she could look after her for a few days. Not having her by his side fills him with anxious energy, makes him want to claw his skin off. He hopes this won’t take more than a day or two. 

But that. That’s the thing that he hates the most - not knowing. Not knowing where you are, or what your plan is, or how any of this will end. Makes him feel weak. Powerless. Like he used to be. 

Like when Da-som’s mother left him.

He fucking hates feeling powerless. He will not go back. 

From his perch on the table that serves as the sole furniture in this room, Jimin watches him stalk back and forth, like a tiger prowling his cage. He doesn’t say anything to Yoongi, likely not wanting him to bruise his throat again. Jimin’s developed a bit of a squeak when he laughs, and it has not amused him in the slightest. Although Yoongi thinks it’s pretty funny.

The burner phone in Jimin’s pocket buzzes and he flips it open. “Any sign?” 

Yoongi halts in his tracks, waiting.

Jimin sighs. “Fine. Just keep looking.” He tosses his phone on the mahogany surface, merely shaking his head at the older man. 

Yoongi resumes his steps. Where the fuck did you go? You couldn’t have gotten very far in Jungkook’s police cruiser. It never returned to the station, and Yoongi’s goons are sweeping the area under his orders. But even though he has everyone searching for you, you’re nowhere to be found. 

“We’ll find them,” Jimin finally speaks. “It’s just a matter of time.” 

“Time is running out,” Yoongi spits back. The longer you’re gone, the more likely it is that you’ve called in reinforcements. Set a trap in motion. He can’t just sit here and wait for the walls to close in on him. 

He needs to move. 

“Listen, I nailed the kid, so he’s undoubtedly slowing the two of them down. We’ve got guys watching the hospitals, the clinics, every medical center in a 100 mile radius - there’s no way they’ll get past us to get him some help.” Jimin smoothly slides off the table, brushing dust from the sleeves of his button-down shirt. “We just have to be patient.” 

Yoongi immediately pounces forward, pressing Jimin back into the wall behind him. He doesn’t touch the younger man, but holds him in place with the intensity of his stare. 

“No. I’ve been patient. For five fucking years now, I’ve waited to take my place at the top of the chain in this goddamn city. And now that I’m here, I’m not going to fucking hide and wait any longer. YN-” he curses silently at the slip-up, “she isn’t going to take everything from me.”

“What are you saying?” Jimin asks, wincing at Yoongi’s glare. The usual sociopathic gleam in Jimin’s eye is dimmed under the older man’s gaze. He’s terrified right now.

“There’s a key in that safe that she stole. It belongs to another box, where I have kept a very important list. Among other things.” If only he hadn’t kept that safe at his house. If only he hadn’t brought you there. If only you were who you said you were. “I’ve got to get to that list. It’s the only thing that she needs to bring this all down.”

“And you think you can get to it first?” 

“No.” Yoongi laughs, a cold, ugly sound that sends chills down Jimin’s spine. “I’m sure she’ll beat me to it. In fact, I’m counting on it.”

For the first time in hours, Jimin grins. “Okay, so an ambush, then?” 

Yoongi nods.

“You know I’m in. But… everything you just said, how you just got all this power…” Jimin pauses, considering his words very carefully, “are you prepared to lose it all just to beat her?”

“I’d rather lose it all in a blaze of glory than have that bitch steal it from me,” Yoongi retorts, ignoring the stab of pain in his chest when he snarls the word ‘bitch.’ Stop it, you pussy. Stop pretending like she means anything, he berates himself. 

“Blaze of glory? Fuck yeah, let’s go.” Jimin pulls his handgun from his holster and cocks it. 

Yoongi smirks. “Let’s burn.” 

Masterlist 💜 Find me on AO3 💜 

© 2022-23 by sunshinerainbowsbts/minisugakoobies. Crossposted to AO3. Please do not copy or repost.

[glacierclear]

Okay, so I need a whole fucking rant about Leon's trauma from you, just straight up ted-talk, please, I'm begging you, just any though about this topic that's rattling in your brain

oh good lord, anon. im taking deep breathes but why would you ask me this why would y-

im putting this under a cut because other wise it'd be annoying

need everyone to keep in mind that im still in the baby beginning stages of my resident evil obsession so finer details pertaining to lore and stuff i will not be aware of !!!!! a lot of this is probably headcannoning anyways...

leon's entire character makes me so sad but so stupidly passionate. this young, bright-eyed boy who just wanted to help people. being forced into an unending nightmare. the actor in re2r did such a good job portraying his earnest flavor of justice.

the fact that you can tell he thoroughly believes everything is his fault and even if you told him none of it was his fault he would probably just cry and pretend to accept what you're saying but none of it would reach his heart. and he's not even half-assing anything. he wouldn't forgive himself if he didn't do everything in his power to save people, to do his job, and even then, he can't forgive himself when he does...

that scene in re2r where he first meets marvin and is like "there was another cop...i tried to save him...i tried..." and you can see his lips quiver and he has to bite them to keep himself from collapsing in on himself. it KILLS ME.

and even after that nightmare he was forced into being DSO's little attack dog for the rest of his life. he probably thinks that's what he deserves. he doesn't deserve to have a proper chance at life anymore after screwing up raccoon city so bad. and he probably doesn't have anyone he can really confide in...not truly.

any relationship he manages to have outside of work is probably so loveless. i feel like he is undeniably attracted to partners who don't value him. it validates the part of him that thinks he's the reason all those people died.

maybe he intentionally lets himself get hurt on missions. he drinks until he can't stay awake, until he barfs it all up and then he drinks some more. because otherwise his brain won't stop reliving the past. he probably knows he's sexy. that he's objectively handsome. but he's utterly convinced that if anyone knew him. like actually knew him. they'd be horrified and run away. and he knows he doesn't deserve a good life partner. not really. not truly. he wouldn't be able to make them happy.......

that being said he probably loves animals so much. especially dogs. unconditional love that he can very clearly see, reciprocate, and receive. it's uncomplicated.

it's rare he gets through the night without waking up. either by nightmares or panic attacks or some form of "i feel like im gonna be killed" . he probably trains for hours and hours a week. he has to get better he has to BE better. he has to do it for the people who live and who died. he carries all that on his shoulders. and considering how many times he's been infected with bullshit viruses and parasites over the years he's probably convinced he's JUST LIKE the monsters he kills and that maybe, at any moment, he could hurt those in his life.

and to top it all off. for everything he has to go through and everything he has to fight and everything he has to kill for. he has to do all of that with fucking hair in his eyes because he refuses to get a different haircut.

[cassyapper]

i am so curious about your pucci thoughts...

I AM SO FUCKING SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG TO GET TO THIS ASK OH MY FUCKING GOD my life has been crazy lately but still i am So Sorry

okay so basically i love pucci we have to kill him. here is a list of my thoughts in no particular order

he makes me so ill like genuinely he is one of the most well written jojo characters ever and DEFINITELY the most well written villain. like holy shit. i think a lot about how weather said the evilest of people are those who think they are good and how that relates to pucci oh my GOD it makes me sick. pucci like many villains are a "ends justify the means" kinda guy like while he was cruel at many points i truly think he was jsut like, yes this is a moment of weakness but it wont matter because im going to fix it. i think aobut how he really thought he was going to save everyone. he was going to save perla. he was going to save dio. he was going to save himself. and thinking baout things from his side, like, oh my god. dio was his only friend. we the audience know that dio groomed him (not necessarily sexually but still grooming) and even though dio did seem to grow to truly care for pucci, he didnt care enough to not use him for his plan to restart the world -- but PUCCI didnt know that. im sure he had inklings and feelings like he's not NAIVE, im sure he KNEW dio was using him at SOME point, but it wouldnt change the fact dio still eventually saw him and was his friend either way. it wouldnt change the fact that he would do this one thing for his only friend, even if his only friend BECAME his friend in the first place just to make him fulfill this task. god dio and pucci's relationship is so insane i hate hate hate that people boil it down to just shipping LIKE THERE WAS RESENTMENT THERE WAS ANGER THERE WAS SO MUCH LOVE AND HALF OF IT WAS LOVE FOR WHAT THE OTHER COULD DO FOR HIM INSTEAD OF JUST HIM HIMSELF . LIKE FUCK'S SAKE im sick of ppl putting a romantic spin on everything and YES this is half me being aromatnic but also COME ON. and that's not even getting into the fact dio and pucci's relationship is supposed to parallel jolyne and jotaro's/jolyne and jonathan's. but anyway

god he loved his sister so much man it makes me sick he jsut wanted her safe man. after everything....i choose to believe his final thoughts were of perla. it's why he was begging for everything he did to have meant SOMETHING -- please let if have meant perla got a good life in whatever universe the world will end up in. i like to believe she did. he won't be there to see it. oh god he wont be there ot see it. fuck. maybe that was for the best in his mind anyway

his drama and tragedy aside he's also the funniest guy in the entire world. why the hell is a catholic priest wearing gucci. well i guess that answers the question but still. he is so fucking funny he is not even subtle about it he is LITERALLY like EOUGH DONT TOUCH MY EXPENSIVE DESIGNER PANTS and then he kicks a cop to his death for it. he's so fucking funny i love him so much. i love that whitesnake is independent enough to have its own personality and he and pucci get into spats sometimes OS FUCKING FUNNY. MFW I ARGUE WITH MY OWN SOUL.

also my disdain for shipping culture aside i cannot deny that pucci is a homophobic homosexual. he and jotaro totally banged a couple times and awkwardly called it off when pucci first sees jotaro's birthmark and he's like oh no. SO FUCKING FUNNY

ugh sorry i jsut want to go back to this point he's so smart he's so Aware of how people work and connect he's always had a fine sense for it (do you believe in gravity...) OUGH like there's no WAY HE DIDN'T KNOW DIO WAS USING HIM BUT HE STILL LOVED DIO AND I THINK BEYOND THAT. I THINK HE TRUY BELIEVED WHAT DIO WAS SAYING. I THINK HE TRULY BELIEVED OKAY EVEN IF DIO HAS HIS OWN MOTIVES HERE, THIS END IS JSUT. SO I WILL KEEP FOLLWOING ALONG. LIKE. I. i truly think he thought this would save everyone, especially perla. ohuogh my god PUCCIIIIIIIIIIIII

in short, he makes me sick we have to kill him. i like him a lot

[002yb]

Just saying

✨️Rockstar!Dick✨️ and ⚡️bodyguard!Jason⚡️

Slade having his own security company

Takes point with Dick as needed because Wayne Entertainment pays the prettiest penny (and lbr Slade is begrudingly charmed by Dick - the punkass fucker)

Scheduling conflict leaves Slade unable to partake as Dick's security detail; can't skip on current job, but won't pass on offered job, either

Reluctant and resigned to put his best underling on the job, but desperate times call for desperate measures: Jason

Specifically smaller!Jason. Who still had a rough upbringing on the streets and is a bit stunted for it.

Slade making the introduction

Dick immediately refusing

Jason bristling because fuck you

Meanwhile Dick's band/entourage/what-have-you cackles in the background because 1) Jason is petite and 2) there's no way Dick isn't going to try and fuck him

Dick is aware of this. So is Slade. Hence Slade's aforementioned reluctance and resignation. Jason is someone he trusts and has confidence in though. There are no safer hands for Dick to be in.

Meanwhile Jason is oblivious, thinking he's being refuted because of his stature.

'You will not fuck him.'

Jason startling because what the hell? Of course he won't fuck the client what even - only to realize that Slade is leveling with Dick, their client. Jason's flabbergasted. Absolutely floored because obviously Dick won't want to fuck him and -

Dick with his hands raised, smile cheeky as he laughs under his breath, shameless although he's been caught out, 'No promises.'

And Jason keeps his composure because professionalism, but he's also flustered because for fuck's sake, if only Slade or Dick knew that Jason has crushed on Dick from the start of his career; Jason would bend over for him right then and there fuuuuuuuuuck

Yeah, that's right. None of this 'never heard of you' nonsense. No 'I don't think you're all that good; prove me wrong,' plot line here. Just Jason trying to be a professional and Dick tormenting him throughout because Dick isn't a fool - he knows; he's no stranger to attraction.

They do keep it professional though hahaha. Flirting aside, it's just playful banter and fun. A slow burn where Jason plays bodyguard/caretaker/boyfriend.

Dick and the band/entourage/whatever being struck dumb when Jason lays down a threat that tries to charge Dick

Petiteness be damned, Jason is dangerous

And Dick is a client with nerves of steel, tbh. He really just watches unblinking in the face of oncoming disaster and Jason thinks it's weird af.

Dick claims it's because he's not worried; he has full confidence in Jason

Tbh though Dick can look after himself really well (has learned a lot from various people throughout his life, Slade included; thought about turning in the glitz and glam for law enforcement. Got relatively far with that, too, so. Security is more a precaution than anything; more eyes are better than just his, sometimes).

When Dick shares the above, Jason grimaces and complains that Dick has never been more unattractive, wanting to join ranks with pigs

Arguably Dick is already among pigs (music industry, entertainment as a whole)

Jason scoffs because Dick isn't wrong. WE arguably most ethical of the lot, but still lacking; he sees firsthand the workload put on Dick and it's infuriating

Anyway, bonding over Dick wanting to be a cop because why???

Dick open and honest that it's because of all the young people he encounters. Terrible life circumstances and he helps them with what he creates and being a distraction, but wants to do more than that; hates getting on stage knowing what he knows because he wants to help all these people who help him

Jason scowling because damn, there Dick goes becoming all attractive again

Jason admitting that he was actually a social worker before Slade picked him up

Which. What? Really?

Jason brushes Dick's interest off. It was a short lived career. Jason didn't even make it a quarter of a year before he was let go of for being 'too combative.'

'That's part of your charm.' Dick teases him and Jason scoffs, rolling his eyes and looking away, cheeks flushed

Caretaker!Bodyguard!Jason

This has it's own little section because just like. Jason can't do anything about Dick's schedule, obviously. It drives him up a wall how Dick is run into the ground though.

What's more infuriating is that it's partly by choice that Dick does it. Those extra things Dick tacks into his day are so wholesomely good though that Jason can't protest.

Just Dick doing make-a-wish type things; taking time to meet and greet, charity events, etc.

Depending on when Dick has ten free minutes, he'll nap

Jason's shoulder and lap become designated pillows for said naps

Jason allows it if only because he sees Dick putting in all the work

Also - Jason chasing after Dick with food and snacks because when Dick gets going he stays going and get some fucking calories in omfg drink water or Jason will funnel it down his throat so help him

Unrelated notes:

Bodyguard!Jason who also writes poetry

He keeps it in a tiny book and doesn't share because he thinks it's embarrassing

Dick adores it though

Dick writes little music notes over top of them - rough melodies

[elaine19day]

The obligatory bottom!HeTian post lol

Since the old post got lost, let me compile a new list here for fanfics where HT is the one taking it up the ass (it's a rare thing on Ao3 haha) First of all, THIS is the tag for bottom HT fics on AO3 - but then again, not every author who writes it also uses the tag. So here's a list of works that I know of which definitely contain bottom HT: (there might be more, but I haven't had time to read and verify it) • vulnerability by powerandpathos Mo and HT try out something new • Merman Kisses and Devilfish Wishes by blackmore Little Mermaid AU (contains switching) (RU version here) • Backstage Escapade by Potchans (havent read it) Band fic where Mo fucks HT backstage • Body Language by AtomicNebula13 HT comes back and tries to mend the relationship he had with Mo (contains switching) • into camouflage by minisoysquares (havent read it) Cop AU • going stupid by hetiansboi (havent read it) [no summary] • The Gift & What's in the box? by kruder HT gives Mo a special birthday present • I'm Not A Prostitute by traceytries Mo and HT become fuckbuddies (contains switching) • Stages by domini_moonbeam band AU, poly fic where everyone tops/bottoms • Blowing Up by domini_moonbeam HT returns and worms his way back into Mo's life (contains switching) • Open by domini_moonbeam poly fic where they all fuck each other (moon has also written several oneshot-spin-offs to this fic, just check her account) • the voyagers by powerandpathos (havent read it) was told this fic has implied scenes of bottom HT (non graphic) it's on my reading list anyway since it's a D&D AU ...and finally there's a bunch of stuff I had written myself over the years, which you can check out here: ♦ November Night (oneshot) Mo keeps fantasizing about having sex with HT - when it finally happens, HT leaves the decision to him which way it'll go. ♦ While you were Sleeping (oneshot) HT got drunk, Mo decides to cease the opportunity (contains somnophilia, sort of...) ♦ I won't let go 'til it bleeds (multi-part, finished) HT comes back and things are different. Though he doesn't have to try THAT hard to win Mo back over... (contains switching) ♦ Tianshan 18+ (fanart/edits compilation) not a fic, but a collection of my artsy stuff, some of it contains HT as bottom ♦ Nothing Left to Give (multi-part, unfinished) HT loses his memory after a car accident. Mo tries his best to win his heart again. (contains switching) ♦ Merry Fucking Christmas (multi-part, unfinished) She Li lurked in the shadows all these years, waiting for his revenge. Contains SL/HT and rape, torture, etc