#woegasm

[achromatophoric]

Wenclair Week - Day 3: Cursed Lover

In the Addams family armory, a confession is made as two girls gear up.

Enid: *lacing boots* Babe, I already know all about it. One love, all-encompassing, madness or death if not returned—it’s totes fine!

Wednesday: *checking knives* This unfortunately does not concern my family curse.

Enid: *looks up sharply* You have a different curse?

Wednesday: *adjusts bandolier* Quite so. There was an incident with a fairy godmother of the morally corrupt variety. I required her hair.

Enid: *gasps* You did not!

Wednesday: I certainly did. Needless to say, she was less than pleased. Gloves?

Enid: *passes a pair of gloves* So what does this curse even do?

Wednesday: To be concise, it breeds suffering and misfortune whenever I experience a state of venereal rapture.

Enid: *scrunches nose* Venereal? Uh—ew! Next time, please just say orga— Ohmygosh.

Enid: *stifles sudden giggle*

Wednesday: *peers at Enid while adjusting gloves* What is it?

Enid: *blurts out* Wednesday Friday Addams, are you telling me you have WOEGASMS?!

Wednesday: *goes deathly still*

Enid: *triumphant wiggle*

Wednesday:

Wednesday:

Wednesday: *through gritted teeth* Yes, I suppose I am.

Enid: That is SO you, babe! *giggles delightedly*

Wednesday: *sighs*

Enid: *grabs a spear* Okay! I am totes ready to take on today’s horde of giant toad demons.

Wednesday: *flourishes dual machetes* As am I. Let’s go.

The two head for the mansion exit, bristling with weapons and sheathed in protective gear. When they reach the doors, Enid shoots her fiancé a curious look.

Enid: Hey babe, I was wondering. Why did you bring up the curse?

Wednesday: Ah. Well, do you happen to recall when our toad problem first arose?

Enid: Wasn’t it the day after the Wicked-themed Rave’N, senior year?

Wednesday: *subtle smile* Correct. You made for a most ravishing Glinda.

Enid: Thanks to that amazing wig you got me. And your Elphaba? Sexy AF! That dress of yours was absolute fire.

Wednesday: And yet you preferred that dress on our floor, along with yours, my hat, our undergarments…

Enid: *smirks* Yeah, we spent the rest of the night defying gravity, didn’t we?

Wednesday: *fondly* Our very first time. One of my most treasured memories.

Enid: *warm smile* Same.

The tender moment lingers as the two stare lovingly into each other’s eyes, until it is interrupted by a distant croaking noise.

Enid: *blinks*

Enid: But what does that have to do with the toads?

In answer, Wednesday throws open the front doors to reveal the encroaching knot of cow-sized demonic toads and their peculiar cries of—

Tormentoads: Woebbit! Woebbit woebbit! Woebbit Woebbit! Woeb—

Enid: 😧

Enid: *aghast* You’re not seriously telling me…

Wednesday: *steps outside* Indeed. One summoned for every single woegasm you disgorge from my wretched depths.

Enid: 😧

Wednesday: Fret not, mi lobita insaciable. Be proud as you gaze upon the undeniable proof of your carnal talents—

Wednesday: *lips curl in a mad smile*

Wednesday: —and know, with the same immutable certainty of death and taxes, that last night… *glances back at her mate*

Enid: 🫢

Wednesday: Last night you, as you are oft to say, rocked my fucking world.

Still smiling, the twice-cursed seer turns and charges into battle with the reckless abandon and boundless enthusiasm of someone who has recently had their back properly blown out.

Enid: 🤭

🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸 🗡️ 😈 🔪💨