#withcruelty

[agnoia]

❛  you look so pretty when you're taking my cock.  ❜

her breath hitched at his words, a tingle running through aching body as she felt him push into her. there was never anything quite like it- the moment their bodies joined. it wasn’t a rare occasion at all, not for the two of them. but she couldn’t ever get over the way his touch lit a fire beneath her skin. his lips dragging over her neck eliciting the sweetest moan as she fumbled for his hand. soon his fingers were in her mouth, every atom in her body screaming for him to just take her. to do it over, and over, and over again. every centimeter of her body belonged to him. he knew the map of her skin better than anyone to have ever lived. every tattoo, ever freckle had been tasted by his lips. no piece of her had been unexplored by his roaming hands, his sharp eyes noting every curve and dimple.

one hand stayed around his wrist, the other moved to grip sheets as slender legs wrapped around his waist. faint whimpers could be heard around long digits, tongue dancing over each finger with the metal of rings cool in comparison to the warmth of his skin. fuck, did he know exactly what to say. the effect of his words could be felt in her body as sweet blue eyes begged for more, staring intently into green. where words would surely fail her, her body language would surely tell him that it was craved. that praise, that attention. dirty talk like that was one way to make her head spin, and all logic would be quickly thrown out the window.

" d-doriano- " one word. the only one that her tongue could form as his fingers moved from her tongue to her lips. it was all she could say, all she could think as his hips rocked into hers. @withcruelty knew every single tactic to make her into a whining, sobbing, begging disaster. it was his talent.. it didn’t matter how many times they had sex, it always had a tendency to outdo the previous time..

" more.. please. "

[hidefire]

" sit down before you fall down. "

@withcruelty ... an old prompt.

she doesn't want to listen, but she does. ultimately, rain knows that he's right. she had pushed herself a little bit too far, and it doesn't help that she's been sleeping even worse than usual, somehow. maybe passing out would be a good thing, even! would it count as taking a nap?

"i'm fine." she'll push, even if there's no point in even trying anymore. once she's sitting, she does feel significantly better. the world stops spinning so much. "once i like. sit for a minute. i'll be fine."

[agnoia-moved]

🕯️ .

send 🕯️ for my muses inner thoughts about yours

you’re so stupid. i love you more than anything. i’m glad i met you, i can’t think of my life without you in it. i can’t believe you’re real. how could you love someone like me? i’m so fucked. how did we do all of this? do you know how much you mean to me? i’d do anything you asked. i love the feeling of your hands against my skin. i love your lips on mine. can you kiss me? should i kiss you? i look so dumb with the smile you paint on my face. i still can’t believe we’re here, that we actually did something so absolutely insane just to stay together.

i love you. i love your stupid smile. i love your stupid laugh. if you look at me right now i’d melt into a puddle. the temptation to tease you right now is insane.

please, g-d.. don’t take him away from me. take anything you want from me, just not him.

@withcruelty

[agnoia]

" why do you think i was in foster care? i got my asshole of a father sent to prison. does that count? "

"daddy issues? just traumatize your dad back."

[agnoia]

what if we did? a question she didn’t actually know the answer to. the idea had felt like a far fetched dream, rather than a possibility. an impulse rather than a full fledged plan. in her mind she felt stuck, falling somewhere in between what she wanted, and what was expected of her. she had this self imposed pressure, an intense feeling that she had to take a certain path in life. this whole situation- this relationship with doriano- had started to make her question if where she is… if that’s where she actually wants to be. a lab, crime scene photos burned into eyelids.. gunshots and sobbing families, interviews with few happy endings.

curled up on the bed, wrapped in his sheets.. this was the closest she’d ever felt to actually belonging somewhere. when she was with him— she didn’t feel the weight of the world that constantly pressed down on her. she didn’t feel like she had to hide as much of herself. his mask had been dropping over the past couple months.. and hers had too.

those moments of silence felt to her like an eternity. each breath that filled the quiet sending another burning thought into her head, and for a moment his initial statement sent a wave of panic through her chest. she knew the feeling— maybe that’s why she wanted so badly to escape. the fear of never being able to find it made her want to run even more.

with you.

the words hung in the air for a moment, and yet a warm wave was washing over her. hearing that, having him express it.. it gave her a glimmer of something that she hadn’t felt in a long time..

hope.

" anywhere’s a pretty big place.. " she said, leaning forward as blue met green in the comforting way they always had. eyes that saw her wholly, in all her flaws and cracks.

" but i want to explore it.. all of it. as long as you’re by my side. i want to get away.. far away.. where i don’t have to remember anything. " she wanted a new start. a new story, with a happy ending. and she wanted him in it.

" do you.. do you think we could do that? eventually, i mean.. "

@withcruelty

[agnoia]

receiver finds sender stood over a body. (he's not doing anything i promise) - @withcruelty

" do you uh… do you need me to leave..? "

[agnoia]

"There's something about the way you say my name..."

" should i say it again? and again, and again, and again? " she hummed, looking up at @withcruelty with a playful smile. " do-ri-an-o. " the name left her lips in a singsong fashion, her hands finding their place on his chest.

[agnoia]

" the fuckers deserved it. "

she can’t say that the announcement hadn’t brought her some semblance of relief.. the death of the two men who had kidnapped her.. who had tortured her and forced her to fit their sick fantasy.. it felt like a weight had been taken off her shoulders, the worry of retaliation, of their return— it was gone.

" i know they did. " she said softly, leaning on the wall beside her, eyes cast down for a few moments before flicking back up. she was allowed a visit, but it was meant to be kept short. it had taken some convincing to even let her this close. if alyssa found out she’d flip.

" why’d you do it..? " her voice cracked, her hands gripping at her arms. she wasn’t saying they didn’t deserve it, because they certainly did. the suffering the two caused would leave its mark on her forever. but she couldn’t help but ask. however there was no judgement in her voice, no anger, no fear, none of that. she just.. wanted to know. it was a risk for him, a longer sentence possible. he could have let them live, could have just as easily stayed away. " are you okay..? " a worry filled her tone, flooding into the cracks. they didn’t tell her much over the phone.

she wanted to hug him. to have his arms around her again. for him to tell her that she was going to be okay, that she could feel safe again. he’d made the world safe for her again, at least a little bit. he’d done what others couldn’t- make the people who hurt her hurt too..

the words thank you felt wrong, considering the fact that two men were now dead. but she hoped that her eyes would convey that fact, the way her body didn’t seem as tense as it had for the past month and a half.. her mind wasn’t as messy, her fear was less now that the men that haunted her nightmares could no longer hunt her in her waking hours.

slim hand slipped between the bars, though guards were on high alert as she did so. she wasn’t allowed to bring anything in, they’d checked her over multiple times before getting to this point.. no- they were afraid that @withcruelty might do something.

[agnoia-moved]

" i’ll make sure i get their numbers, just to make sure everything goes okay. they probably won’t give them to.. but i know garcia is willing to help me out, keep an eye on things so i don’t annoy the fuck out of her. but you remember my number, right? so you can call me once you’re settled and get the chance.. "

" nah.. i wouldn’t sell your stuff. there’s no need to. but i can go through it, put some of the stuff into boxes, organize a little. " part of her just didn’t feel right selling anything of his, even if he said she could. she knows he’s not necessarily the sentimental type- but fuck, she was. everything had a story, and she hadn’t heard them all yet. " honestly, i might for a bit. my apartment windows are broken- they won’t open anymore. and a studio, having everything in one room? man, it sucks. but i hate to tell you, the food’s probably bad by now. at least in the fridge and on the counter. pantry might be alright, but you know how much i suck at cooking. "

i’m fine. i’ll be fine. unlikely, but she’d let it go for now.. it wasn’t something to push. it was prison, it was going to suck.. nikki knew it, and so did he. but saying it wouldn’t make a difference. he was stuck there.. might as well try to fake it for the moment.

" it sure as hell isn’t memory foam, huh? " a soft laugh of her own left her lips at hearing his. " i’ve heard people say that they preferred sleeping on the sidewalk… kinda crazy. "

" i’m… " fine rested on the tip of her tongue, her default.. the go-to when she obviously wasn’t. the fact that he’d even asked meant that she definitely didn’t sound it. " i’m hangin’ in there. besides, we both know i hardly sleep. i run on pure caffeine and spite at this point. " she hoped to make a joke of it, mask her struggles with humor. but she hadn’t slept well in weeks at this point. again a combination of the bunker and this whole mess.

" they’re chaotic as ever.. said they missed me like crazy. even asked about you. wonderin’ how you were. you left quite the impression when you came out with me. they all seemed to miss the tall guy with the pretty eyes. " a soft smile made its way onto her face, and even creeped into her voice. that fondness, that happiness.. " we went to all my old spots.. even showed the guys some of the pictures i’d been taking out here on the coast. they really liked the ones we took on the beach last month. " though to be fair they had really enjoyed the fact that nikki was smiling, even if the situation was rough at the moment.. the memories were enough to bring a smile to her face- and her friends were happy to see that again.

" i took a little vacation.. boss figured it would be good for me to go back to a familiar place far away from.. ya know- " a wave of her hand, even if he can’t see it. " i just got back sunday night. i’m supposed to take my time and all that crap.. but i hate being idle.. " she had a lot of anxious energy she wanted to get rid of. drown herself in distractions for the time being, until she felt safe enough to finally rest. the only time her head seemed to be clear was when she was with people she trusted.. and that list was getting shorter and shorter by the day.. she felt safest with him- at his house, in his arms. especially after what had happened.

" you know me, i’d butcher the name if i tried to say it. " nikki laughed, leaning against the wall as she stared up at the ceiling. " i can barely say that one, and the only reason i can is because you said it first. french is a language i just can’t seem to get a grasp on. too many unnecessary letters. you can say a whole sentence and every word’ll sound the exact same. "

there was a pause for a moment, a breath as she held her phone just a little tighter. the urge to tap her bracelet, only to remember that it wouldn’t reach its audience.

" i miss you, doriano.. "

it was his own damn fault. the night he attacked alyssa was difficult to figure out on his part. it certainly wasn’t lust. desire for revenge and humiliation, certainly - and that loved to intertwine itself with his own problems. but it lacked the substance that the murders had. he would’ve loved to put his hands around her neck. his own testimonies, the damn eyebrow scar he sustained - and her without much injury, even trying to manipulate the call she had going, against her.. just didn’t go the way he wanted. a longtime FBI agent was certainly more trustworthy to the judge. the transfer to where he was actually going was to happen in a day or two. “i’m supposed to be transferred out sometime tomorrow morning, i don’t know really - but you should probably make sure to get their information in case you want to call them.”

“nah, no.” he shook his head as if she was there. he hated the watchful officer. being surveiled all the time just pissed him off. he knew he was there. these fucking calls are recorded too. “if there’s anything you feel the need to sell, go for it.” he paused, sucking on his teeth. surviving was the best he could do. he’s already gone through some of the worst of his life, what’s another experience tacked on? “i meannn… that house is paid off entirely so i guess you could stay there if you want? probably should check on and eat the food there.”

“i’m fine, and i’ll be fine.” he wanted to be honest, for once. it just wouldn’t force itself out of his mouth. a couple years in prison; this wasn’t his first experience in a prison. the first one for about a century, but even then… an assault charge, even against a federal officer, was the least of his worries about this entire situation. it was the charges alyssa kept trying to tack onto him; he did commit them, but lack of dna, evidence and remains left it still very circumstantial, and that saved his ass. still - it was now forever tacked onto his name, and reputation.

“sleeping about as well as i can. feels like a military cot.” he gave a dry laugh. it was a relief to hear her voice again, she sounded exhausted, though. “you? how are you doing? are you sleeping?” the most tender question he’s asked in a while.

“oh, yeah. i remember them a bit.” a crowd he would’ve loved to fall in with earlier in his life. when nikki had introduced them, they just clicked.

“how’d that go? you able to get some time off from work?” his voice perked up. interest was easy to come by now - something other than the fucking temporary cell he’s held in, the fucking case. his damn psychology. “does the bottle say where it’s from? i know there’s a lot of nice vineyards in bordeaux.”

[agnoia-moved]

@withcruelty made these and if you ever are curious about nikki’s state of mind when it comes to her boyfriend

[agnoia]

fun fact: nikki becomes immortal in her canon. not even kidding. does it sound insane? absolutely. the story itself is even crazier. her asking her adopted father figure, an archangel, for help. then g-d ends up talking to her, asking her if it’s what she truly wants. and she says yes. it’s canon, it’s been plotted with @withcruelty. :) it’s wild

[melioro]

the team had all been rotating on check ins at this point. each member taking their turn to check in on the youngest of their team. nikki had been placed on a mandatory leave after black jack, the concern being her mental state and recovery after the events that had transpired. between court appearances and investigation, everyone had noticed that agent finch’s mental health had been hanging on by a thread. she hadn’t quite been cleared by the psychiatrist to come back to work, and she had seemed hesitant.

alyssa had tried to convince the younger to stay back in dc. she’d offered a room at the reid house, so she would have support and a stable place to stay.. but there was a little more to it than that. the doctor couldn’t stand the fact that a government agent was staying under the roof of, in her opinion, one of the worst men alive. from the first day she knew that something was off about doriano niculusi. and that same suspicion was still at the forefront of her mind as she stood in front of his door. she can’t help but wonder what the younger woman saw in him, why she was so intent on staying in this house, with this man.

but checking in wasn’t the only reason she was here, though it was her main one. the new cluster of murders that had popped up gave her fresh evidence for her case that had brought all of them out to north carolina in the first place. and with the events of blackjack? she was fairly certain that it was proof of a de-evolution. this level of chaos certainly could cause a certain escalation of violence. so it wasn’t just nikki she was checking on— but doriano as well.

" i just need to make sure she’s alright. i just need to ask the usual questions, check around to make sure the environment is still safe. " she wanted to get right down to it, passing him to go into the house as he stepped out. good- she hated his presence.. and it gave her a chance to do her job.

she passed the threshold, her stomach twisting at the thought of being in the house again. it was darker than she’d like. a light switch was flicked on as she made her way down the hall, eyes scanning her surroundings. technically speaking she wasn’t able to search anything.. but the in plain view rules would apply. if she could just find something, anything that felt out of place-

Since they got Nicole out of Black Jack, his paranoia had skyrocketed. Emotions sought destruction in his mind when he tried to sleep, and they always threatened to spill from his mouth in conversation. He could barely even help one of the three people he gave a shit about. And it’s her fucking fault. A weird experience for a man whose emotions were often so blunted. The toll was painted on his face, though it wasn’t unusual for him to be awake during the evening through the midmorning. His work just required it.

There’s someone here.

Blood boiling at the sight of Alyssa — so many myriads of reasons for it — he quietly opened the door and gave a small smile in greeting. Meeting her on the set of steps up to the doorway, Doriano pointed his head towards the door he exited. It wasn’t locked, she could just go in. “Nikki’s asleep if you want to head in. Don’t know how much she’ll respond. Been out for about an hour at this point.” In a non-creepy way, he liked watching her sleep. Seeing her so peaceful, especially lately, was a rarity. A shame it was @melioro checking in, tonight; he was hoping for less hostile company. Doriano didn’t want to talk to the agent for any more than he needed to. Getting any sort of reaction with the meds they’ve supplied Nikki with was difficult, he’s sure it’s on par with a horse tranq.

Another small, but close-together cluster of murders was probably the explanation for Alyssa of all people being here. The one to work on the original case(s), she knew the area well enough at this point. He considered following the agent in, just to see what her process was; to make sure Nikki was safe. He knew she wouldn’t like it. Instead deciding to lean against the porch fence, the Sicilian watched the car Alyssa arrived in and let his mind wander; he kept another spare key in his pocket — if she locked the door, he could get in. He knew she wouldn’t, she had no reason to. But..

You can’t trust people. She’s been probably wanting to shove that gun down his throat and fire since they met. Who knows what she’s doing, in his house?

A couple of steps over to grab the cigarettes and matches he kept on the table. He didn’t like his house smelling like smoke. Back to the fence, Doriano looked out to the Atlantic. Trying to keep himself here, his thumb struck down, and he lit his cigarette with the match. Every second passing was a reminders of the insult she inflicted - he didn’t think of himself as a very proud person; he portrayed it, yes, but genuinely? No.

[agnoia-moved]

ᾰ̓́γνοιᾰ • (ágnoia): the state of not knowing or perceiving. ignorance, unawareness.

an independent, highly selective, mutuals only blog for NICOLE “NIKKI” FINCH. tortured by aspen.

a study in: the weight of something. i don’t really care i cried to god. monologue about a damaged child. living for someone else. finding light in darkness. escapism. did it all for love.

heavily affiliated and shipped with @withcruelty

also affiliated with: @bauresurrected & @razedhell

carrd. memes. headcanons. opens.

[agnoia]

ᾰ̓́γνοιᾰ • (ágnoia): the state of not knowing or perceiving. ignorance, unawareness.

take courage, my heart: you have been through worse than this. be strong, sanity my heart; i am a soldier; i have seen worse sights than this.

an independent, highly selective, mutuals only blog for NICOLE “NIKKI” FINCH. tortured by aspen.

a study in: i don’t really care i cried to god. when does a candle become a blaze? ruthlessness is mercy upon ourselves. i'll become the monster. we must do what it takes to survive. i know we’ll be fine. haven’t i suffered enough?

heavily affiliated and shipped with: @withcruelty

also affiliated with: @bauresurrected & @humanchewtoy & @murkyhazed

carrd. memes. headcanons. opens.

⚠️ this blog contains dark themes and triggering topics. read carrd before following.

au’s: bg3, until dawn, phasmophobia