#with the text under the read more

[traumasurvivors]

This is a blog post I wrote on various grounding techniques. This link leads to my own personal website with other trauma articles. If you want to read the article but don't want to click an external link, it is available under the read more.

For anxiety, panic attacks, flashbacks and/or nightmares.

In those moments, it can be hard to think of what to do. Please consider writing yourself a to do list for those moments that you can go through. Whether it is things from this list I am sharing with you or your own grounding methods you have thought of. Write a step by step of how to get yourself grounded that you can have on your phone or notebook. This will make it easier when you're feeling panicked and/or stressed to navigate through calming techniques. Another tip is to try some of these things when you're calm. Don't try them for the first time when you're in a panicked state.

Physical Sensations

Put your hands in cold water (you could even hold an ice cube.)

Squeeze something soft like a blanket or stuffed animal.

Hold a favourite item like a stimming toy or something you love. If you are outside, consider picking up a leaf (or rock etc) and examining it and how it feels.

Put your hand over your heart and feel it. You are here. You are present. Inhale (through your nose) for four seconds and Exhale (through your mouth) for six seconds.

Cuddle or pet your dog/cat if you have one.

Pick up and touch items close to you. Feel the texture of them, the weight. Really focus on these traits.

Think of things you enjoy touching. I know someone who keeps bubble wrap around so they can pop it when they feel distressed.

Taste

Drink or eat something (if you can) with a strong taste. (Something really sour, maybe something spicy, or anything with a strong taste.)

Chew gum or suck on a mint or similar.

Let a chocolate or similar melt in your mouth. Really focus on the taste and the sensation.

Drink a cold or hot beverage.

Please be aware of your limits. Are you going to be able to focus on this? Is there risk of you choking if you panic and/or dissociate heavily?

Sight

What do you see now? What colours are the walls? What is the floor made of? Name five items in the room with you?

Flip through photos that you like

Read a book, article or something you enjoy reading.

Scent

Spray a scent that is non triggering like a body spray, or air freshener.

Have some essential oils to smell when you need.

Do not light a candle if there is a risk of you dissociating too much to remember it. This can be dangerous. Please only light a scented candle if you are certain it is safe to do so.

Smell your favourite foods, or candy with a strong smell.

Sound

Put on a non-triggering movie/show/youtube video

Put on some non-triggering music.

Listen to the sounds where you are and list them off. Are there bugs chirping outside? Are people doing work outside? Do you hear a heater/fan going? Etc.

Play nature sounds (there are apps that do relaxing sounds. Consider downloading one.)

Call a friend. (If this happens in the middle of the night, maybe ask a trusted friend to send you some recordings you can play of them saying calming things for you?)

Listen to an audio book or read a book you like out loud.

Other

Have an anchoring phrase/mantra like: “My name is ___. I am ___ years old. I live in ___. I am safe. ”

Have a soothing or distracting app you go to on your phone. (There are colouring apps and just nice games or activities to do.)

Try the 5-4-3-2-1 method.

Having a self-care box

Remember that even if it does not feel like it right now, you are going to be okay. You’ve gotten through this before and you can do it again. I believe in you. I hope you believe in you, too.

[aromanticduck]

🖤🩶I hope every asexual has a good day today🤍💜

💚🤍I hope every aromantic has a good day today🩶🖤

I hope anyone who comes into the notes to say something like 'why can't you just wish everyone a good day?' has a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

[laufire]

as I read green arrow '01 I've been going through mia's simultaneous cameos in other runs, and that's how I found out about this little arc in gotham central #33-36, aptly named "dead robin".

the story starts when they find the corpse of a young boy dressed in a high quality robin costume, with the tools to match, prompting the cops to wonder if he's the real robin, aka tim (who has a cameo here and there). at the end of the second issue a second dead boy appears, proving this was no accident, but that in fact they're likely facing a serial killer. a third boy (third robin) is saved just in time before the end. the man behind it turns out to be a journalist obsessed with costumed vigilantes, who wanted to be "part of their world."

what drives me insane about this is the timing. because if you look at the publication dates, this story arc started right after jason unmasks himself before bruce in batman #641, and it finishes around the time utrh picks up again (you know, after that little detour where bruce ~investigates steph's death just so he can be exonerated from it, at the cost of character-assassinating another female character).

just imagining that while jason was back in gotham doing All That, this was all happening, with bruce clearly going berserk during it (entering arkham and assaulting every immate, breaking a cop's nose, scaring the living crap out of the perpetrator... and I know it's simply about lack of synergy, but it's interesting to me to think that for all of that, he -rightly!- must've not suspected jason).

as I said. insane asñflkjdsf. I can't wait to use it in fic.

oh, and, please, behold (click for better quality):

anything to say, bruce?

[coralloid]

Some parallels I've noticed between Paris, Texas (1984) and Disco Elysium (2019)

[g0nta-g0kuhara]

The Chapter 4 Essay Part 1: Kokichi Ouma

A metapost on my thoughts on Kokichi’s overall motivations and Gonta’s actions during ch4. Split into two parts. You can find the Gonta half here: (LINK)

I think the way Kokichi acts when he’s telling the truth says something crucial about his personality. When he’s telling the genuine truth, his expression becomes carefully neutral.

(post trial, chapter 1)

To me, it feels like he’s trying very hard to keep this face of neutrality. Normally, he’s able to expertly express any emotion that he wants to. In these moments, its almost like the emotion he’s feeling is so overpowering that he’s trying to repress it in order to maintain control over the face he presents to everyone else, but isn’t quite able to do so.

Kokichi is very careful about keeping people from seeing the parts of himself that he doesn’t choose to show. His villain persona and constant lying is part of this- He wants to keep people away from him. During the events of the killing game, he uses the distance that he creates in many ways. Part of it was that not having many close alliances allowed him to go off and do whatever he wanted during daily life. This let him explore the school and investigate the truth of the killing game without interruption or much attention. Lying also gave him distance between the game and himself. Pretending that the killing game was fun might’ve been his way to cope with everything that was happening. I think Kokichi is really damn good at separating himself from his emotions, lying to himself to do what he thinks needs to be done. This line from Chapter 1 is pretty telling…

(post trial, chapter 1)

This was also something he says himself to Kaito in the exisal hanger during chapter 5.

(post trial, chapter 5)

I’m inclined to believe everything that Kokichi says to Kaito in the exisal hanger. As Kiibo says when Kaito questions it, “I think his dying words may have been the honest truth.” Knowing he was about the die, and that he absolutely needed Kaito’s help to get his plan to break the killing game to work- to achieve his genuine, true goal- I don’t see any reason for him to lie.

This emotional distance extends past just the killing game. I think it's a key part of how he interacts with others around him.

Kokichi is an ultimate leader. I think he uses his talent throughout the game in an attempt to “lead” everyone from the shadows. He wanted to stop the killing game and escape with as many people as possible. However, his methods are very ends-justify-the-means. I believe that he did genuinely care about everyone at the ultimate academy, but in the detached way a distant king might care about his subjects. On the other hand, if he had to use or sacrifice a few as pawns for the greater good, that is what had to be done. It’s not like it didn’t emotionally affect him, but I think he was deliberately trying to keep his distance so that it would not impact him as much, and so that he could continue trying to tear the killing game apart with as many tools in his arsenal as possible.

(post trial, chapter 5)

With this core motivation in mind, this brings us to Chapter 4.

In my opinion, the Killing Game Busters was never a plan that was meant to succeed. From an in-game perspective, the idea that he was originally going to follow this mercy kill plan doesn’t make sense to me. Firstly, Kokichi already had suspicions that they were being watched as early as chapter 3.

(post trial, chapter 3)

…and he later confirms that he was fully convinced of this fact when Monokuma agreed to reuse the chapter 4 motive in the virtual world.

(post trial, chapter 5)

He knew that this killing game was for somebody else’s entertainment. I’ll go a bit into the secret of the outside world in a moment, but considering this, I don’t think he ever fully believed in it. Choosing to mercy kill everyone, in the name of a “truth” that was incompatible with what he had discovered… just doesn’t make sense to me.

Not to mention, from a narrative standpoint, I think the idea that he was completely for this mercy kill plan, decided to throw out the plan mid-trial, and then start an entirely different plan to end the killing game in chapter 5, isn’t very compelling. It weakens Kokichi’s overall character by making his motivation less cohesive and making him seem less organized over all, which I think is one of his strengths as a character. A Kokichi that is this fickle with what he’s trying to do would not have been able to write the script for chapter 5.

I think he always had different goals in mind with the Killing Game Busters. The first was something that is made very clear in chapter 5, but started here in chapter 4: He wanted to stop the killing to give himself room to break the game while minimizing deaths. The second was to further villainize himself, for all the reasons I talked about above, and some more I will get into in a little bit.

Seeing the secret of the outside world was undoubtably disturbing, regardless of whether he believed it or not; there is a noticeable shift in how Kokichi acts before and after he swipes that card key. Combined with discovering that Miu, someone he’d been working with closely, was planning on murdering him, I believe that seeing the destruction of the outside world pushed him towards more drastic measures than what he had been doing in previous chapters. He decided that in order for his plan in chapter 5 to work (which he had almost certainly already been planning at this point, considering how elaborate it was), he needed to make everyone question if pursuing the truth was the right thing to do at all.

After Miu’s body discovery, nobody was really worried about losing this class trial. Everyone had seen how Shuichi had guided them all to the truth and caught the blackened three times in a row, despite the unique difficulties in each case. They had full confidence in his abilities.

(investigation, chapter 4)

Shuichi is also not really doubting his abilities as a detective anymore. One of Shuichi’s core internal conflicts is his fear of the consequences of revealing the truth. Up to this point, it seems like he’s been moving past it. Especially after catching Korekiyo “Actual Serial Killer” Shinguji, who had no regrets or grey motivation for his killings. Shuichi’s morale, and subsequently everyone else’s, was at an all time high. (Of course, he was starting to feel a lot of pressure to solve these cases and save everyone on his own… but that’s another issue. ily Shuichi)

If Kokichi could take the wind out of Shuichi’s sails, really destroy the confidence he had built up so far, he could set up his impossible trial in chapter 5 to be more likely to work as intended. Everyone will be less motivated to try and figure out what happened if they are uncertain that finding the truth would actually result in anything good.

And I do believe he was trying to knock Shuichi off balance specifically. Damaging his confidence is one thing, but he was also deliberately trying to drive a wedge between him and Kaito. He antagonizes Kaito all chapter 4 investigation, including making up a nickname for Shuichi (“Shumai”) that directly riffs off Kaito’s closeness with Maki. He insists into the trial that he and Shuichi are partners now.

(class trial, chapter 4)

(Sidenote: Kokichi’s behaviour during trial 4 is genuinely really interesting to me. On top of the direct digs like this, he says a lot more subtle things to get under Kaito’s skin during trial 4 that I think are super neat to pay attention to.)

Theoretically, pushing Kaito away from Shuichi, combined with the powerlessness he’ll feel in the wake of the truth of both trial 4 and the outside world, could make him easier to convince to join Kokichi’s “side”. He even directly asks Shuichi to team up with him before leaving the virtual world:

(daily life, Chapter 4)

This leads me to believe that Shuichi was originally the one that Kokichi intended to use to build his impossible trial. I mean, if Shuichi was the one in the exisal hanger and presumed dead instead of Kaito, the chances of everyone else solving that mystery drops Significantly. Everyone else, aside from maybe Kiibo, was 100% convinced that Kokichi was the mastermind at that point. No one except Shuichi would’ve tried to dig as deep as he did, for better or for worse. I think this idea is supported by the note that Kokichi wrote next to Shuichi’s face on the whiteboard in his room (“trustworthy?”). He was clearly considering Shuichi as a person for one reason or another, and I believe this is it.

By condemning Gonta, who everyone else perceived as a kind soul who would never hurt anybody, someone who was struggling to understand what the virtual world even was with his amnesia, would be perceived by the others as kicking someone when they were down. Gonta has an absolutely miserable time through the accusations and wholly blames himself for how things turned out in the end. That, and Gonta’s actions were even well-intentioned. The secret of the outside world was apparently so horrible, Gonta thought it would be kinder to mercy kill everyone rather than force them to face it. This result would make everyone question if the truth was really as undoubtably good as they had come to think so far; Not only did Gonta suffer because they had to find the truth, but seeking the secret of the outside world would apparently also only lead to suffering. This would make them hesitate during Kokichi’s impossible trial.

(class trial, chapter 4)

As I said before, Kokichi’s second goal for trial 4 was villainizing himself even further. He says that this was a goal himself to Kaito in chapter 5.

(post trial, chapter 5)

Part of this villainization was just adding to the persona he had already created for himself and that I already talked about his motivations for before. The other part was what he says here. He specifically wanted everyone to think that he was the mastermind. This gave him leverage in two main ways. First, making himself appear to be the mastermind with an actual mastermind as hands off as Tsumugi genuinely gave him power over everyone else. He used this in chapter 5 to put a pause to the killings and give himself more room to enact his plan to break the killing game from the inside.

(daily life, chapter 5)

Although he then says “You guys can commit suicide together or kill each other… / Or, you can change your mind and stay here! You’re welcome to do that too!”, having experienced the secret of the outside world already, I think he’s pretty confident in what they will be feeling in this moment. No one is going to kill each other, and he knows that. He wants them to take that second option for the time being while he sets up his plot.

Making himself appear like the mastermind also benefited his impossible trial plan directly. Everyone would be much more likely to vote for someone they were convinced was the mastermind rather than one of their friends. No one would suspect that it was really him that was the victim.

“Using Gonta and making him into a murderer” was a significant part of how he villainized himself, but the way he treated Gonta during this whole experience was also a major factor. Starting as early as just after Miu was killed, he begins to be really aggressively mean to Gonta. He just straight up bullies him throughout the second half of the trial.

(daily life, chapter 4)

(class trial, chapter 4)

And then, after all this, he acts remorseful and sides himself with Gonta at the very end. It isn't genuine emotion like he felt before Kaede's execution, shown by his neutral expression. To me, this uncharacteristically open expression of grief feels like it was just set up to exacerbate the impact of his cruelty after Gonta’s execution. At this point, everybody’s little faith in Kokichi has been shaken significantly. With the shock of the trial, maybe you Could start to believe they were on the same side, as a team. Then, at the reveal of the extent of Kokichi’s manipulation, that is all ripped painfully away again.

(post trial, chapter 4)

(post trial, chapter 4)

Even if these parts of trial 4 make my stomach turn, I don’t want to imply that Kokichi is completely cold-hearted and unfeeling. Actually, I think there were multiple moments in chapter 4 that show him struggling to regulate his emotions and keep face around everyone else while he enacted this plan.

1: I don’t think Kokichi initially planned to make the reveal that Gonta was the killer as dramatic (or frankly, a bit traumatic) as it ended up being. He had been carrying himself a certain way during the first half of the trial, and I think Shuichi lying to his face in front of everyone about Kokichi’s own alibi dramatically changed his attitude. I mean, Shuichi lied (as he had done almost every trial and gotten 0 flack for) and Tsumugi even called him out on it, but everyone believed him over Kokichi anyways. So when Kokichi lies, it’s completely inexcusable, even though he’s been working tirelessly on his own trying to save everyone?* But when SHUICHI lies, and gets caught in it, people go along with him? They don’t doubt their trust in him for even a second? This double standard infuriated him. It’s at this point that he completely shifts in energy. If Shuichi, no, everyone, is going to disrespect him like this, he was going to make them suffer for it.

(class trial, chapter 4)

2: Kokichi only goes full villain after Kaito says “Kokichi, If you really cared for Gonta, explain yourself to everyone” in the post trial. I think that even though he was always going to paint himself as the villain, he was legitimately affected by the things that had just happened (Gonta’s death, Miu’s attempted murder, the secret of the outside world, even if he knew it wasn’t real) and what he’d just done. Even if he was trying hard not to be. The sudden shift he has from not saying anything to cackling about how little he cared about Gonta feels to me like he was kicking himself back into gear after trying to process some genuinely difficult emotions. 3: After Kokichi punches Kaito down, and everyone completely ignores him in favour of helping Kaito up, Shuichi says these iconic words to Kokichi: “Kaito always has us by his side, see? But no one wants to be around you. / You’re alone, Kokichi. And you always will be.” Kokichi responds like this:

(Post-trial, chapter 4)

There’s something about the way he cuts himself off, pauses, and then his mask falls. I think Shuichi’s words got to him more than he wanted them to. Honestly, Kokichi’s attitude towards cooperation, keeping everyone at arm’s length, and insisting (to himself) that he (as a leader) must fix the killing game completely on his own just seems so lonely to me. Even if he is intentionally trying to alienate himself and get everyone to hate him, being so viscerally cut into like this must have hurt. Especially from someone he was trying to work to get onto his side. It’s no wonder he quickly left after this moment.

This is what I think drove Kokichi in chapter 4. He’s a leader who wants to “lead” his classmates into safety, but he isn’t afraid to use underhanded, cruel tactics if he thinks it will get him ahead in the game for the greater good. He viscerally represses his emotions in order to keep himself going and keep everyone else away from him. He tried to destroy Shuichi’s confidence and drive a wedge between him and Kaito to get him on his side for his plan. He used and made Gonta into a murderer to villainize himself and discourage everyone else from seeking the truth.

Whenever I imagine Kokichi on his own, out of the spotlight of the Audience or the eyes of his castmates, he’s never as expressive as he is in the open. I think in reality, Kokichi is a pretty depressed and lonely person. His clownish personality isn’t entirely a facade, and outside of a killing game scenario, I think he would act pretty similarly to how he does in game. But I do think that he uses it as a mask for his true emotions. While I feel like the “evil villain” persona is a genuine part of Kokichi’s personality, outside of the killing game he probably doesn’t act on it as deeply as he does in-game. I also think Kokichi struggles with letting people become close to him, even without anything on the line. The killing game just caused him to lean into these aspects of his personality hard, and in potentially the worst ways.

*I feel like here it’s important to mention that personally, I still think the collateral damage he caused in his attempts to stop the killing game matters. A lot. I don’t think he should be excused for the things he did, even if he had good intentions. This makes him a really interesting, morally grey character, and I like that about him. EDIT: I can't believe I have to add this, but please do not use this essay as ammunition for harassing people who ship ougoku… I don't agree with doing that at all. I hope I made it clear that I find Kokichi to be a complex character whose mistreatment of Gonta was never targeted, and more just an aspect how how he isolated himself and how he manipulated others to end the killing game, even if it caused suffering to them in the moment. Kokichi cares about everyone in the ultimate academy, in his own weird, detached way. He's not completely heartless nor is he an abusive monster. And even if none of that was the case, it's never an excuse to harass people for disagreeing with you. Please be cool!! Thanks <3

[yyshcul]

birthday comic about FOMO and the stress of growing up and cake. (my birthday was on the 20th btw LOL i just forgot to post this comic)

i was kinda hesitant to post this because i know people who are older than me will comment something like "oh this is nothing, just wait till you're 37! 😂😂😂". and there will also be people who will call me a spoiled baby because i don't have a full-time job nor a car nor my own place nor five children at 19. and i just wanna remind those people that you know absolutely nothing about my personal life & this comic is about MY personal, current feelings. you don't have to relate to everything you see on the internet. go complain somehwere else please

[w1f1n1ghtm4r3]

so...... april fools shuffle unit vs anyone?

welcome to the usual keep reading lore yapping section. will try to keep this fairly concise but i make no promises it did not stay concise. im sorry in advance

aoharu - park sekai vs theme: high school students in a band, but unlike leoni vs, their afterschool practices are outside of the school

miku - the "cool senpai", except shes not actually older than aoharu... in fact, shes younger than all of aoharu (if only barely younger than ichika)! shes a 1st year high schooler like ichisaki! but she is the mentor figure to them in her experience with music. - shes also not actually that "cool" once you get to know her, although shes pretty chill shes also got some rather silly interests. including collecting stickers to stick on her guitar case. - the main vocalist of the band, but shes got a bit of experience with most of the instruments that the others play. shes no expert but she knows how to play any of them. currently trying to improve her guitar skills! she brings it around with her a lot of the time for the impression it gives to others

len - alongside rin, they main guitar and keyboard. most of the time its len on guitar and rin on keyboard, but theyre both capable of filling both roles and swap occasionally. hes the one usually helping miku improve her guitar skills! unlike miku though, he doesnt carry his guitar around everywhere he goes. - playful but laidback. hell mess with his friends but hes not going around getting into trouble besides that, really - also a 1st year! in fact, the kagamines and miku are childhood friends :) theyve managed to stick together for a long time

yyj - backstage sekai vs theme: idols who have been kind of... abandoned by their management and have to take up those roles themselves

miku - cheerful, bubbly, what you'd typically expect from an idol... except shes also stressed out of her mind because yeah, the sekai isnt exactly... hospitable, to say the least. it doesnt always show and she can cool down from it, but when you live in a world of sprawling hallways and rooms that should have people in them but dont, it definitely has some Effects. - when shes not worrying about that shes quite dedicated to her practice, after all, an idol never stops! - her energy transfers into a bit of everything she does, really. fast talker, fast walker, she can be hard to keep up with if you arent ready for it.

luka - a more mature, gentle idol. she can put on plenty of energy when performing, but she takes things at an easier pace outside of practice. she enjoys her quiet free time. - a lot less tense than miku is about the whole sekai situation, not to say she doesnt feel the effects of it either. shes just better at hiding her feelings about it.

fts - alleyway sekai vs theme: street musicians, but in a darker, rougher direction than vbs

miku - is this a miku or a mikuo? no one really knows and theyre not telling. theyll answer to miku regardless. - very much a troublemaker, gets into fights a lot. can be tough to get along with because theyre pretty abrasive, but they also know their purpose as a sekai miku. getting help from them can just be frustrating sometimes - kaito has been trying to get them to cool down a bit, to mixed success

kaito - livehouse owner (i havent named his livehouse yet...), kind of a stern dad guy. cool, tough, serious, you get the idea. not a bad guy, but he will be hard on fts and the other vs when they need to be straightened out. - despite that, his livehouse is open to performers of all experience levels. just prove youre willing to give it your best shot and hell let you perform. this is a problem for fts, when theyre struggling to get things together as a unit.

hapisen - headquarters sekai vs theme: comic book/cartoon superheroes! they even live in a superhero tower!

miku - shes kinda your straightforward superhero prodigy type, extremely talented as a hero despite her young age. loud, energetic, but very kind and happy to help anyone in need. - by extension shes also got your very typical superhero powers. flight, super strength, etc. she doesnt use them that often around the base though, in fact, most of the vs dont use their powers in the base that often. better off saving them for when theyre out doing hero things!

rin - one half of a superhero pair, obviously. her powers do function on their own and shes capable of doing things without help, but shes a bit weak on her own. but when together with len, their powers amplify to something stronger than either of them separately. i think they probably have electricity powers. - shes a bit reckless in the field, but shes very enthusiastic about being a superhero! super high energy girl, always bouncing around the base getting ready for whenever shes needed next

kyushumi - woodland sekai vs theme: fae royalty, specifically with a butterfly style focus

miku - very quiet and reserved, shes a bit awkward during interactions with most people, but shes well meaning. no ones sure where she came from, even the other vs, and that might have something to do with how she acts - she will stare at you from the bushes and youll just have to get used to it. shes just curious about things, and she wants to observe kyushumi to figure out the best ways she can try to help them.

meiko - technically the fae queen? but she doesnt often act like it, she tries to be more approachable. shes still got a bit of an imposing aura, but shell act more warm and kind to those around her. she is secretive though, and despite her kindness, theres a bit of detachment from everyone. - mikus guardian, since no one really knows how miku got here, so someone has to keep an eye on her. she also considers herself kyushmis guardian, but since theyre not always within reach due to the disconnect between sekais and the real world, theres only so much she can do. she tries her best with what she can

[aro-throughyourchest]

[start id: an edited screenshot of a character!tommyinnit neg post where much of the page is scribbled out in red pencil and written over in white. the top of the post can see an icon of a previously exed out c!tommy replaced with a checkmark and a portion of the url marked out. The header is edited to read “c!tommy LOVE page,” love all caps. The rest of the text, altogether, reads,

we love c!tommy here. i will probably never use this blog except for loving ctommy and giving primes but i have a boiling love for this one awesome minecraft character that gets bitches and more more more primes that’s right i’m talking about c!tommy. he’s not precious silly and way bigger than every other c!dsmp loser.

he made better c!dream’s boring server and broke all of the idiot rules—no griefing, no fighting, no stealing and encouraged others to do the same and c!dream is a massive pussy , i say

/end id]

[spaceprincessleia]

"The magistrate is a former Imperial, but she's an industrialist. My idea was that she had a knowledge of metallurgy and obviously knew what beskar was. And she was pillaging this planet and stealing all of its resources - people who were willing to take everything from a world and give it to the Empire were valuable to the Empire. And even after the fall of the Empire, the people who built the war machine were still out there and really dangerous. They need to be tracked down because otherwise, they're going to keep doing what they're doing and find new ways to exploit people." (Dave Filoni, The Art of Star Wars - The Mandalorian S2)

MAGISTRATE VERSION 1B “It was around this time

that they wanted to make the magistrate a woman and

to maybe wear more red, the wine palette.“ Matyas

MAGISTRATE VERSION 119 “I really like graphic elements, something that has a really strong silhouette, especially for Star Wars; it‘s so important. [My concept art mentor] Dermot Power does such a good job with side profiles of characters. I think some of that, in my brain, it came out in this side view. [I was also exploring] the airbrush Blade Runner look for combat makeup and different hairstyles; if you can get the hair to work with the origami look for the clothing, heat-pressed hair that can be like very chiseled in structure.“ Matyas

MAGISTRATE VERSION 02 Matyas

MAGISTRATE VERSION 4B Matyas

MAGISTRATE VERSION 122 Matyas

“Jon was very insistent that the person playing the magistrate had to be somebody who was obviously skilled with martial arts, and we did a deep search trying to find somebody who could embody this character. Then I happened upon Diana Inosanto‘s name, and her history and her father [Dan Inosanto], who is a martial arts legend. Her family‘s connections to Bruce Lee [Dan Inosanto being his student and Diana, his goddaughter]. And that just felt right to me. Then, when we called her in, [we found out that] she‘s somebody who watches Clone Wars and Rebels with her kids. And she was just ecstatic. I said, ‘Well, you know who you‘re going to fight, right?’ She almost fell over right there.“ Filoni

MAGISTRATE VERSION 109

“I was also looking at kendo uniforms, or something that has that really graphic read [with strong shapes and silhouettes] like an origami look. They weren‘t saying ‘No,’ so I kept exploring things in that realm. Maybe her combat outfit is hidden under her formal look.“ Matyas

[skunkes]

not so easy

[oatberrytea]

Ofelia Robles is the only child of Diego and Luna Robles. Luna, always a little fragile of health, passed shortly after Ofelia's birth leaving behind an immense unfillable void in the hearts of her family; because of this, Ofelia has always felt as though she's walking around with only one shoe on.

Diego never fully recovered from Luna's death which created a feeling of longing and sorrow that hung like a cloud over Ofelia's childhood. Ofelia was a serious child, quiet and watchful, unknowing how to make her father smile but wanting to more than anything. Eventually, Diego's mother, Lucia, came to live with them and it was the first time Ofelia felt that things would be okay.

Ofelia likes stories, having heard countless from her grandmother growing up, she escapes through them as an adult through reading, but only for a short time, at night before bed, because during the day she's a hard and dedicated worker on the ranch. She loves horses but none more than her own horse, Bebita, a rescue that she's training to show at the local rodeo.

Ofelia may not have any experience with romance but not for lack of wanting it, it just took her a while to figure out what she liked. Now she wonders if she might have missed the opportunity for love and thinks perhaps she wasn't meant for it, not that kind at least.

As a grown, mature woman, Ofelia is intense, enigmatic, introverted, a self-proclaimed recluse and hard-working. She has a small circle of people she cares for and is disinterested in growing it. Despite attempts from her best friend to put herself out there Ofelia has been an immovable object…if only there were some unstoppable force that could budge her from her stagnation.

[traumasurvivors]

Here's a link to a blog post on my personal website on a topic that I think is very important.

I've also put it below the read more for people that don't like external links.

When it comes to healing from trauma, there are a lot of emotions an individual may feel. One of these emotions is anger. Anger is one of the emotions I see invalidated the most. For example, I’ve been told that being angry is “letting the person who hurt me win.” I’ve been told that I’m only hurting myself with my anger and that it’s holding me back from healing. All of these assumptions were wrong.

Anger is often viewed as a bad thing because it can drive a lot of unpleasant behaviours but it can be used for good. While anger can hurt you and others, it doesn’t have to. There is a difference between destructive anger and constructive anger. Destructive anger is often expressed in a way that causes harm to yourself or others whereas constructive anger can be used to better understand your situation and figure out your needs. Constructive anger can be a way to show respect for yourself.

For example, if you’re in a situation with a friend where they do something that makes you angry (for example: cancelling plans, forgetting an important date, etc), constructive anger may involve you stepping away from the situation to figure out the cause of your anger (for example: you feel their actions imply you’re not important to them) so that you can then sit down with your friend and communicate in a calm manner. This may allow your relationship to grow and build with a better understanding of each other. Destructive anger in this situation may involve you yelling at your friend and insulting them, which will likely damage or destroy the relationship. If the hurt your friend has caused makes you want to re-evaluate your friendship, this is valid and there are still constructive ways to end a friendship that will cause the least amount of hurt for all involved. It is also important to note that ignoring the anger and bottling up is likely to cause a bigger blow up down the line or cause “overreactions” to other circumstances.

If anger is bottled up, it can end up coming out unintentionally. You might find you’re getting much angrier at everyday annoyances and disagreements than you might think reasonable. People might push you away or respond badly to your anger, because they feel they do not deserve it - and looking back later, you might feel they don’t deserve it, either. However, because of the anger you’re holding back, you can’t see that in the moment. This is why it is important to think and consider your anger, and listen to what it’s trying to tell you. I have found asking questions of myself to analyze my anger can help, such as in an anger inventory like this one.

While many people see anger as an emotion that causes people to lash out and destroy things, anger can also help to motivate people to create new things. Marches to “Take back the night”, or for “gay pride” have much of their motivation based in anger at injustice and oppression. New laws to better protect survivors of domestic abuse or otherwise help society are often driven by people feeling a huge amount of anger. Properly harnessed, anger can help to take action to change things for the better.

On a more personal level, anger can also be a motivator to improve one’s own life. Many people have used the anger they felt at those who put them down as a motivation toward success. That success might be completing schooling, winning an international athletic competition or publishing a novel. One thing all of those have in common is that they are rarely possible to do with only a little time or a little effort. They are time-consuming tasks which usually require months if not years of work. They can be easy to give up on without motivation - and for many, anger is a big help to keeping that motivation.

It took me years to feel anger. For the first while, I felt ashamed, guilty and like I deserved the abuse I’d endured. Feeling angry at the people responsible for this was a step in my healing. I began putting the blame on those responsible and not myself. I was realizing that I did not deserve to be treated in the harmful ways that I was. This was huge to me as someone that had spent years thinking I deserved my trauma and as a result, future trauma and abuse as well.

There were instances where my anger was destructive, mostly to myself. I engaged in self-harm as a way to vent my anger and it also caused problems in my relationship at the time because I held my anger in and would get really frustrated and project my anger onto my relationship which was not fair to my partner.

Over the years, I’ve learned to cope with my anger more efficiently. What works for someone is largely dependent on them and their needs. For me, it was a literal punching bag to vent out frustrations and journaling. It was sitting down with my anger and treating it like a friend trying to protect me (because it was in a way). It was listening to it and finding the cause. My true anger came from those who hurt me, and in a way, took a part of me. My anger largely came from grief and betrayal. Understanding where it came from did not make it disappear, but it did offer me perspective and allow me to better manage it.

For some, anger is a cover up for other emotions. It becomes a defense mechanism against feeling the sadness, hurt and other emotions that a person does not want to feel. The anger is just the first layer and understanding where that anger comes from, and that the anger is a cover up is a great step in moving beyond it. Feeling the emotions beneath it will play a big part in moving beyond the anger.

Anger is a valid and understandable emotion when it comes to healing from trauma, even if your trauma does not have a specific person to blame (natural disasters and death of a loved one are examples). If the person who hurt you did not mean to or did not know better (like another child), anger is still a valid emotion. You’ve been hurt and you should not have been and it is reasonable to feel angry at this.

For a lot of us, anger plays a part in our healing. And that’s okay! You’re allowed to feel angry. Anger becomes an issue when you allow it to consume you and hurt you or others. The feeling itself is not inherently bad, and it can actually be a good thing. Your anger can be used to help you. It’s what you do with your anger that decides whether it’s helpful to you or not. When I was first told that my anger was “letting the other person win,” I believed that and felt invalidated. I have since realized that my anger has been an important part in understanding my pain and my needs. My anger is not letting someone else win, but letting me win, by helping me to heal.

[sapphire-to-the-rain]

inspired by this lovely lovely art by @immunitypotion !!!!

i LOVE fanart based off specific looks that two queens wear at the same time it is my roman empire 🤧 here is nymphia being completely enamored by kitty plane and plane not knowing what to make of it (yes ik she goes by plane but nymphia called her jane at first and got away with it which i think about all the time)

[theodysseyofhomer]

Emily Wilson is a professor of classical studies at the University of Pennsylvania. Her translation of the “Odyssey” was published in 2017, and her translation of the “Iliad” will be published in September.

June 28, 2023

In one of the most moving and memorable scenes from the “Iliad,” the great Trojan warrior Hector says farewell to his wife, Andromache, who has urged him not to risk his life by fighting on the plain. He gives their baby back to her, tells her to go home, and reiterates his decision to advance on the enemy.

Around 100 complete English translations of the “Iliad” have been published over the past 400 years. Their variety shows no clear trajectory of cultural change: Some of the more recent Homers are more archaic and less idiomatic than many earlier ones, but some are not. A wide variety of forms are used to “translate” the dactylic hexameter of the original, including prose and free verse as well as several poetic meters.

The translations reflect a wide range of possible interpretations of this short passage. Is Hector harshly scolding Andromache for offering advice about the war, despite her gender? Or is he treating her with gentle pity? Is she worried only about her husband’s death, or is she also concerned about her own imminent enslavement and their baby’s slaughter? Are her concerns valid? Does the warrior risk his life despite his love for his family, or because of it? Why must men fight? Why must women weave? How strange, or how familiar, is the society of the poem?

Each of these translations — along with dozens more — suggests a different understanding of the central themes of courage, marriage, fate and death.

The Original ‘Iliad’ 6. 482-497

The original poem is composed in beautifully musical, metrically regular dactylic hexameter, and designed to be performed out loud: It is poetry for the mouth and ear, not the page.

The scene evokes the complex emotions of three separate characters — the frightened baby, the woman, the man — and it also includes a silent fourth, the enslaved nurse.

The text provides a vivid account not only of Hector’s words, but also of his actions. At the end of the passage, he picks up again the shining helmet that he took off because its plume frightened his little son, and in so doing, he becomes again “bright-helmed Hector,” as the traditional formula of heroic poetry describes him: He again assumes his role and costume as a man who lives and will die by war.

Before this passage, Andromache has pleaded with Hector to adopt a safer strategy, rather than go to almost certain death by meeting the enemy on the open plain. As she reminds him, Hector is risking much more than his own life. His death will entail his wife’s rape and enslavement, their baby’s violent death and the sack of their city.

Hector’s response suggests a fascinatingly contradictory attitude toward his own actions. His firm tone could suggest brash confidence and/or a man steeling himself for a heartbreaking choice to prioritize his own honor over the lives and freedom of everyone he loves — a choice that becomes possible only when presented as no choice at all.

George Chapman (1611)

The first complete translation into English, by the playwright and erstwhile soldier Chapman, creates a staunch, fatalistic version of Hector, reflecting the poet’s interest in Stoicism. Chapman uses a metrical form that was already old-fashioned in his day, “fourteeners,” or rhyming heptameters; the original does not rhyme.

The translation expands on the original in ways that may be startling by modern norms — for instance, by rendering the single word for “tearfully,” dakruon, as “fresh streams of love’s salt fire.”

…This said, th’ heroic sire Gave him his mother; whose fair eyes fresh streams of love’s salt fire Billow’d on her soft cheeks, to hear the last of Hector’s speech ,In which his vows compris’d the sum of all he did beseech In her wish’d comfort. So she took into her od’rous breast Her husband’s gift; who, mov’d to see her heart so much oppress’d, He dried her tears, and thus desir’d: “Afflict me not, dear wife, With these vain griefs. He doth not live, that can disjoin my life And this firm bosom, but my fate; and fate, whose wings can fly? Noble, ignoble, fate controls. Once born, the best must die, Go home, and set thy housewif’ry on these extremes of thought; And drive war from them with thy maids; keep them from doing nought. These will be nothing; leave the cares of war to men, and me In whom, of all the Ilion race, they take their high’st degree.” On went his helm; his princess home, half cold with kindly fears; When ev’ry fear turn’d back her looks, and ev’ry look shed tears.

Alexander Pope (1715)

Pope’s translation, into elegant rhyming pentameter couplets, was a best seller in the 18th century and remains a classic. Pope adds a great many details entirely of his own invention, inserting anachronistic notions of marriage (“my soul’s far better part”), and explaining emotional responses that are unstated or ambiguous in the original: For example, Homer does not explain why Andromache is crying, but Pope clarifies that it is from “fear.” Pope invents some wonderful aphorisms that have no basis in the original but add zing to the couplet, such as “the first in danger as the first in fame.”

He spoke, and fondly gazing on her charms, Restored the pleasing burden to her arms; Soft on her fragrant breast the babe she laid, Hush’d to repose, and with a smile survey’d. The troubled pleasure soon chastised by fear, She mingled with a smile a tender tear. The soften’d chief with kind compassion view’d, And dried the falling drops, and thus pursued: ”Andromache! my soul’s far better part, Why with untimely sorrows heaves thy heart? No hostile hand can antedate my doom, Till fate condemns me to the silent tomb. Fix’d is the term to all the race of earth; And such the hard condition of our birth: No force can then resist, no flight can save, All sink alike, the fearful and the brave. No more — but hasten to thy tasks at home, There guide the spindle, and direct the loom: Me glory summons to the martial scene, The field of combat is the sphere for men. Where heroes war, the foremost place I claim, The first in danger as the first in fame.” Thus having said, the glorious chief resumes His towery helmet, black with shading plumes. His princess parts with a prophetic sigh, Unwilling parts, and oft reverts her eye That stream’d at every look; then, moving slow, Sought her own palace, and indulged her woe.

Samuel Butler (1898)

The prose version by the 19th-century novelist and satirist Butler — a lifelong bachelor — suggests a very different set of assumptions about women, metaphysics, emotions (“his heart yearned towards her” for eleēse, “pitied”) and even time management (“daily duties” for erga, “tasks”). Butler treats Homer’s repeated epithets as skippable, so that phaidimos Hector (“glorious Hector”) becomes simply “he.”

With this he laid the child again in the arms of his wife, who took him to her own soft bosom, smiling through her tears. As her husband watched her his heart yearned towards her and he caressed her fondly, saying, “My own wife, do not take these things too bitterly to heart. No one can hurry me down to Hades before my time, but if a man’s hour is come, be he brave or be he coward, there is no escape for him when he has once been born. Go, then, within the house, and busy yourself with your daily duties, your loom, your distaff, and the ordering of your servants; for war is man’s matter, and mine above all others of them that have been born in Ilion.” He took his plumed helmet from the ground, and his wife went back again to her house, weeping bitterly and often looking back towards him.

Robert Fagles (1990)

Fagles’s best-selling translation, in unmetrical free verse, uses many familiar American idioms and clichés (such as “smiling through her tears,” or “filled with pity,” a metaphor absent from the original). He softens the brusqueness of Hector’s final speech to his wife by rendering daimonie as the gentle “dear one,” and adding “trying to reassure her” and “please,” neither of which appears in the Greek.

Fagles makes Hector’s most iconic phrase, that men must be warriors, sound much chattier and wordier than the original, spreading it over two lines: “as for the fighting / men…”

… So Hector prayed and placed his son in the arms of his loving wife. Andromache pressed the child to her scented breast, smiling through her tears. Her husband noticed, and filled with pity now, Hector stroked her gently, trying to reassure her, repeating her name: “Andromache, dear one, why so desperate? Why so much grief for me? No man will hurl me down to Death, against my fate. And fate? No man alive has ever escaped it, neither brave man nor coward, I tell you — it’s born with us the day that we are born. So please go home and tend to your own tasks, the distaff and the loom, and keep the women working hard as well. As for the fighting, men will see to that, all who were born in Troy but I most of all.” Hector aflash in arms took up his horsehair-crested helmet once again. And his loving wife went home, turning, glancing back again and again and weeping live warm tears.

Emily Wilson (2023)

In my own translation of the “Iliad,” I echo the metrical regularity of the original by using unrhyming iambic pentameter. I thought long and hard about the multiple narrative perspectives suggested by the original poem, and its resonant ambiguities; in this passage, for example, I use both “beloved” and “loving” for phile — a word that could suggest either, or both — because the feelings of both the wife and the husband are at stake.

The rhetorically punchy qualities of Hector’s speech seemed essential, as well as Hector’s insistent focus on his own defining identity as a warrior. Hector is a deeply loving father and husband who makes the choice to leave his family to almost-certain enslavement and death.

As I read the Greek, we feel heartbroken for all three members of the family (or for all four, counting the silent nurse) — and all the more so because there is no hint of sentimentality in the language, no softness in Hector’s final words. The emotions are sketched with extraordinary concision: The only explicit feeling is Hector’s pity for Andromache’s tears (eleēse), but a world of other emotions is evoked through gesture.

…With these words, he gave his son to his beloved wife. She let him snuggle in her perfumed dress, and tearfully she smiled. Her husband noticed and pitied her. He took her by the hand and said to her, “Strange woman! Come on now, you must not be too sad on my account. No man can send me to the house of Hades before my time. No man can get away from destiny, first set for us at birth, however cowardly or brave he is. Go home and do the things you have to do. Work on your loom and spindle and instruct the slaves to do their household work as well. War is a task for men — for every man born here in Troy, but most especially, me.” When he had finished speaking, glorious Hector picked up his helmet with its horsehair plume. His loving wife set off for home, but kept twisting and turning back to look at him. More and more tears kept flooding down her face.

[p-ogman]

Love is Love!

[mastersoftheair]

"Masters of the Air detail: Part 2-Dave Littleton

"[...] Dave is a lifelong WWII aviation enthusiast who has worked on a lot of other films in the past. He has a passion for the B-17 that goes back to his childhood. So much so that he has built a super accurate cockpit, from scratch over 20+ years, using a lot of original parts and equipment. The rest he made by hand. He brought his cockpit to the studio, and it was wonderful for sure.

"Dave worked pre-production, hand in hand with BGI, the company that made a lot, if not most, of the B-17 props and the two full-size aircraft. He gave them the drawings, photos and answered their questions. I think he was instrumental in the success of so many aspects of MOTA.

"I was asked to come over to teach the aircrew how to look like they could pilot, navigate, drop bombs, shoot guns, radio work etc., which ended up being a lot more than that. Dave let us use his cockpit for the flight training and top turret gunner/engineer duties.

"The pilots and engineers went through initial training in Dave’s cockpit and then we would rehearse for the specific scenes.

"I thought that some of the actors might have had some sort of prior knowledge of flying from gaming or flight simulators, but this was not the case. None of them had any concept of flying which was perfectly okay. I had to sit them down in a chair and teach them the very basics of the flight controls and how they are used. Grabbing an imaginary control wheel and had their feet on imaginary rudder pedals. Making sure they used the rudders first and then aileron as you would in a heavy tail wheel aircraft.

"We then progressed into Dave’s cockpit to teach them the myriad of engine controls and their basic function. Later when we had a specific scene, we would go through the procedures whether it be takeoff, landing, engine shutdown etc. Just having them know where to look on the panel for power changes, checklist, formation flying etc. worked out well. The “kids” did a fantastic job and it shows in the episodes.

"The biggest item to try and get across to the actors was being a cohesive flight crew. Remember that the original guys had been flying together for a while and that was an important aspect of their training for the filming. There is nothing sweeter than flying with someone for a while where you get to know each other and anticipate what the other needs before he asks for it. We trained the pilot, copilot and engineer together for takeoff so the pilot would be pushing the throttles with the copilot backing him up, doing the fine tuning, and the engineer in between them doing his part too. The copilot or flight engineer reaching down for the prop controls during power changes as this would differ from one flight crew to another. Same with running the checklist as the engineer and even crew in the back are participating over the interphone. And these details made the final cut and it looked great. Okay, I may be biased…

"Dave’s cockpit was so very helpful for the training because it was on the floor and was easily accessible. The main cockpit used for filming was on a gimbal 20 feet in the air! With Dave’s cockpit, I could lean in from a side window and instruct with all three crew in place. The various directors could also come up to each side and see and direct how they wanted the scene to go. It would give them ideas on camera angles to set up.

"The other aspect of Dave’s wonderful cockpit was its authenticity and detail. He used so many original parts that it is as accurate as could possibly be. Dave wanted it used as much as possible but frankly was a bit shy about this. Not having ever been known for being shy, I really wanted it used for as many close ups as possible and pushed for this. As a result, you can see Dave’s awesome detailed handiwork in MOTA especially in the close-up scenes showing the magneto switches, electrical, primer use and so much more.

"Dave and I were basically the only two on set who had extensive knowledge of WWII aviation and B-17 information. We were constantly being asked questions and were helping lots of different departments. He and I split up the advising since there were several units filming at the same time. We were both out in the field to start mostly at Abingdon where the full size BGI aircraft were. When the volume or studio started ramping up, I stayed there training and rehearsing while Dave continued the field work. We were trying our best to keep things realistic and authentic, but we were spread really thin.

"Dave took off a lot of time from his day job to do this project, as did I, but with the production over runs, COVID etc. he had to go back to work and sadly missed the last few months of filming. We sure missed Dave, especially out in the field, although he was always available by phone and still helped out as much as he could..." - (Taigh Ramey on Facebook)