#wish your mother in law looked as good as mine
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be-ready-when-i-say-go · 2 years ago
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Re: those pictures of momma Joy from the latest 5sos shows—I’m so glad my mother in law looks happy to see her boy 🥰
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baby-xemnas · 11 months ago
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bepo "i have to grieve over my brother but my husband is back from his personal little war and I'm way too happy about that so i'm crying out of happiness instead" of the mink tribe
when something happens but you are already entirely occupied with a much bigger thing - and its crazy that law going off on his "i may not return, sorry" mission alone - WAS more important to bepo in the moment than learning about the death of his brother...
because realistically he kinda lost his brother when zepo left when bepo was 8. he just vaguely held onto hope of possibly seeing him again. learning that big mom killed him took away that possibility and that's all that bepo lost
meanwhile law is bepo's whole life....he lived with law for his conscious years as a teen and adult, and even in simple numbers he lived with law for longer that he lived on zou
i'm absolutely reading too much into the bad writing and shoddy development of bepo& zepo's story, filling the giant gap all by myself but i like that it being underwritten aids to lawbepo. and i love the simple brutality of it
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disneyprincemuke · 10 months ago
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of drunk regrets * fem!driver
the morning after vegas
what does one do when you have no recollection of getting married?
pairings: sebastian vettel x fem!driver, logan sargeant x fem!driver, max verstappen x fem!driver, oscar piastri x fem!driver, mick schumacher x fem!driver
notes: hi late update and that’s because i was crocheting the entire day lol
(series masterlist)
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she hums turning around, her arm landing on something solid instead of a soft pillow. she opens an eye, flinching back when her eyes land on someone’s clothed back, then groans when nausea slowly hits her.
“who the fuck is this?”
the person next to her hums. they left their head before dropping it back into the pillow. “mm.”
she looks around to the best of her ability, snorting when she realises that amidst all her drunken antics from the night before, they didn’t even end up on the bed. they’re sleeping on the carpeted floor of her hotel room.
she lifts her head, ignoring the nausea hitting her all at once. the bed is empty.
a hand comes up to nurse her head, looking down at the body lying next to her with the blanket draped over their shoulder loosely. she brought somebody back to her hotel room with her? now that’s just a tabloid rumour waiting to blow up in her face when she opens up her phone.
she leans forward, wobbling slightly, as she tries to get a glimpse of their face. her eyes widen, landing a smack on their shoulder with some force. "what the hell are you doing here?"
"don't hit me, i'm trying to sleep."
"mick! you're in my hotel room!"
"what?" blue eyes are exposed to the dim lights of the room, disappearing once more when mick shuts his eyes. "what am i doing here?"
"how would i know?" she sighs, slowly lying back down on the ground. "i don't remember anything."
"we didn't do anything... did we?"
she looks down at herself, surprisingly dressed in her pyjamas without any recollection of even making it back into her hotel room in the first place. "i hope not."
"you hope?" mick cries, shaking his head in dismay. "this is not good."
"give me a second. i need to think," she sighs, pressing the back of her hand to her forehead. "start thinking. do you remember anything from last night?"
mick also sighs, simply shaking his head. he pulls the blanket over his body and snuggles back into his pillow. "no, but wake me up when you've figured it out. i'm really hungover right now, mate."
"really? you don't think i am?"
"i'm sure you are, but– what the hell is this on my finger? when did i get a mood ring?"
"you have a mood ring?" there's a momentary pause. "oh, look. i've got one too. when did i–"
they both sit up hurriedly, hissing in pain as they point at each other with a loud gasp. "no! are you serious? did we really do that? when did we even have the time to do that?"
mick cries. "my mother is going to kill me."
"mine will kill me – i'm barely 21, mick!"
"i'm going to american jail! you're not even legal here!" he rubs his eyes. “i don’t wanna go to jail here!”
she scrambles around for her phone, eyes widening at her notifications.
SUPERMAX you and mick???
RATSELL what's ur ig post about m8?
LOWGAN when u wake up, there's a cup of water and an advil on the bedside for u also, check ur instagram
PASTRY you did the funniest thing last night.
LILLIES thanks for the free pizza wish i could've been there for the actual ceremony though? it's ok, maybe at your next wedding
ALBONO please tell me you didn't
LAW SON i think u may have sent logan over the edge cuz wtf is bro doing in my hotel room ranting to charlotte and i at 5am
MICKEY ur asleep rn i can't sleep when do u think we should renew our vows??? oh no we got married!??!??!
BLYTHE mate u got married without me in attendance??? not saying i'm offended but like seriously?
THE BETTER SARGEANT who u married to? if it's logan istg omg is it mick? i saw ur instagram
LANCE
congrats!!!
if i’d known sooner, i’d have bought you a wedding gift before landing in vegas
i’ll get one before the last race i promise
SEBASTIAN ur very funny, do u know that? text me when ur up, we should talk
MUMMY wowww let me know what wedding gift to get you you grow up so fast, my love
PAPA what is all this ruckus i'm hearing between mum and blythe about you getting married? call me.
KRISTEN (PR) team meeting asap. bring the schumacher.
she glances at mick. "my dad's going to kill you."
mick turns to her, shoulders slumped with his eyes widened in panic. "i really really hope my mother gets to me first." he shakes his head and pats around the ground for his phone. "you know what? i'll just tell her myself."
“don’t bother,” she scoffs, lying back down in the pillow sprawled on the floor. “i vividly remember you calling gina when we were getting pizza that you married me in vegas.”
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kristen chews on the inside of her cheek, scanning the group around her. "what is this? i only told you to bring mick."
the girl takes off the sunglasses on her face and sighs. "you think i didn't try telling them off? is this your first time meeting these losers? i– listen, i'm too hungover to tell them off, kristen."
"please let us stay?" max smiles, batting his eyelashes at the older woman. "i promise we'll be quiet. i'm just curious over the events of last night."
"so am i," kristen points out in a soft voice, moving her eyes over the pair seated on the couch on the other side of her table. at that point, they are the least of her concerns. "do you know the pr nightmare you just caused over a couple of drinks? do you have any idea the reckless thing you just did?"
"please don't shout," she says softly, eyes closing. "it was stupid, we know. in my defense–"
"they shouldn't have even let us in the chapel in the first place in that state," mick sighs, shaking his head disapprovingly. “so technically, whose fault is it, really?”
“both of yours for even coming up with the stupid idea in the first place!” logan screams, pointing at them in frustration. “you made a bad decision!”
kristen glances at logan, shooting him a side eye for disrupting her meeting. when logan shrugs, she simply looks back at the married pair her seats. “you’re not even 21! you did this in america too! god!”
“and they shouldn’t have permitted it knowing that i wasn’t 21!” the young girl shrieks, immediately defending herself. this is a hill she is willing to die on. “let’s focus more on the fact that they let two drunk idiots get married instead of the fact that i thought of it.”
“you came up with that idea?” max throws his head back, hissing softly as he shook his head. “why am i not surprised?”
“right? you have to tell her how stupid she is for this,” logan rambles in frustration. “seriously! you couldn’t go one year without making a stupid decision?
she rolls her eyes, glancing at mick from the side of her eyes. he flashes her an apologetic grin and she shrugs with another eye roll in response.
“i mean, you’re an adult. you can do whatever you want, but do you know how legally exhausting the entire process will be from here on out?” max continues, throwing his arms in the air. “knowing you, you won’t like it! there’s a lot of papers to sign!”
“and paper work to read!” logan adds on. “seriously!”
“god, (y/n), how could you be so stu–“
“i came up with the idea,” mick speaks out, turning to max and logan with a small smile. “it’s not her fault, you guys. come on. lay off her a little bit.”
she shoots him a questioning stare. “no, wait–“
mick laughs. “the deal at the pizza place just looked so good. i’m not excusing it because we were drunk, but cut us some slack.”
sebastian, sitting quietly in the corner of the room, finally stands up. he folds his arms over his chest. “it doesn’t matter who came up with the crazy idea to get married in vegas.”
“you’re still not mad?” logan raises an eyebrow. “there’s got to be some part of you that is.”
“how about let me conduct my meeting with my driver in peace? unless you want to take over my job of being her pr officer…” kristen speaks out, looking around the room to shut down any more forms of interruption. she looks back at her. “let me see the marriage certificate.”
“the what?”
“you signed one, didn’t you?“
she scrunches her nose and looks at mick. “did we sign one? i really can’t remember.”
“i don’t,” mick cuts himself off, looking just as clueless, “i literally blacked out last night. i don’t remember anything.”
sebastian beams, standing a little straighter. “i have it right here! look at it, kristen.”
he puts down a piece of paper on the table. the entire room watches the woman read over the paper, lips pressed together.
a small laugh bubbles from her, grabbing the certificate into her hands and bringing it closer to her face. her laugh gets a little louder, sebastian eventually joining her with a hand over his mouth.
“what is so funny?” she sighs, rolling her eyes. “all i can think about is the shopping spree i can’t have this month over the lawyer fees.”
“and the fact that i could end up in american jail for marrying a 20-year-old!”
kristen grins, slamming the certificate down onto the table. “it’s illegitimate.”
“what?”
“oh?”
“surprising turn of events!”
“illegitimate?”
a hand slams into the table, the youngest in the room jumping to her feet. “illegitimate? what about my free pizza? how is that illegitimate? i’m not a schumacher anymore?”
“you changed your name?” oscar pipes up, roaring in laughter, covering his face. this entire ordeal has been very amusing to him.
she turns around sheepishly with a small smile. “i was planning to. how cool would it be to be a schumacher?”
“what the fuck?” logan says to her, bewildered at the thought process. “you’re not married and you’re telling me that’s the only thing you’re concerned about? not being a schumacher in the eye of the law?”
mick giggles, looking up at her with an impressed expression. “schumacher does go along well with your name.”
“i know. should we get married for realsies after this weekend and legally change my name?”
“have you learned nothing from this?” kristen throws her hands into the air. she leans back into her seat, letting out the heaviest sigh of relief as she no longer has to engage with any legal teams. pr wise, it would be easy.
she shrugs, sitting back down into the cushioned seat. “don’t get drunk with mick in vegas.”
“first and last time i’m drinking that much with you,” mick adds on with a snort. though, there’s a small smile playing on his face as he looks at her.
they both know that won’t be the last time they’ll be sending their pr officers into a frenzy. they’re truly a force to be reckoned with.
and, it could have been worse.
“i paid for all the pizzas you ate and threw up last night,” sebastian sighs, shaking his head. “you owe me like $100.”
she nods. “okay, i’ll pay you. still no shopping spree for me this month, i guess.”
mick clicks his tongue, giving her a thumbs up. “i’ll pay him. consider it my wedding gift to you, wife.”
“she’s not your wife,” logan points out with an eye roll. “didn’t even get married in the first place, remember? illegitimate. not even a real certificate. never happened. literally no record of it.”
“i’m curious,” max furrows his eyebrows and lips pouted out. “how did you pull this off to make it seem real, seb?”
“i arrived to their ‘wedding’–“
“not real!”
“logan, cut it out.”
“–before them. i spoke to the receptionist before they arrived; they don’t let drunk people get married. i convinced her to give them the slot anyway just to teach these two a lesson.”
“impressive?” kristen smiles. “you just saved me a lot of paper work.”
“and mick the beating he’d get from her dad if it actually ever happened to go through.”
she smiles, leaning over the arm rest to whisper at mick. she taps him on the shoulder. “we should celebrate with ice cream.”
— bonus
they flood out of the office collectively, the young girl looking down at the mood ring around her ring finger. “we should keep the rings, shouldn’t we, mick? keepsake.”
“to remind you of your bad decision making?” logan questions.
“no, to piss you off.” she turns around and shoves him back gently. “of course, just to keep memory of the one time i was almost a schumacher!”
sebastian tilts his head. “you know you’ll still be you, right? even if you’re legally considered a schumacher? you won’t get his blue eyes.”
“i could,” she hums with a smile. “so, husband. watching the race from my garage tonight like a factory manufactured wag?”
“can’t, wife,” mick sighs. “i work for mercedes.”
“i could get you the second seat if you wanted.”
“you have the power to do that?” she nods. “that’s hot.”
“cut it out, you guys are making max uncomfortable!” oscar grunts, pushing the pair apart.
beside them, max has his fingers plugged into his ears and is humming softly to himself. “it’s not real, it’s not real. they’re not actually married,” he whispers to himself. “and it will never happen.”
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fallstaticexit · 1 month ago
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Prev / Next / Beginning / Pillowfort
AN: Just so no one is confused, I turned Summer Holiday into an official Landgraab. I needed another legendary blonde to play as Nancy’s yapping bougie cousin (her father’s niece) and she was casted immediately.
Transcript under the cut
Malcolm: [wails]
Geoffrey: [grumbles] I got ‘em.
Nancy: [yawns] I’ll get him. Need to feed him.
Geoffrey: [murmurs] Won’t fight you for it, dear.
Nancy: [snorts] Oh, I bet.
Nancy Narrates: [Malcolm was the polar opposite of Jonathan in every way. He cried relentlessly through the night. He could never keep anything down. His tiny body always wound so tightly]
Nancy: Ok, Malcolm. What would it take to for you to allow me one full night of sleep? That’s all I ask.
Malcolm: [grunts, hiccups]
Nancy: [softly] Oh, come on. What could possibly be so bad that you must cry like this?
Nancy Narrates: [Most nights, I cried with him, fearing he inherited my melancholy]
Malcolm: [whimpers softly]
Nancy: [sniffs] There. See? Calm. Easy. I know that’s asking alot, coming from me. We’ll get through this, together-
Jonathan: Mommy wahhh!
Malcolm: [cries]
Nancy: [sighs]
Nancy Narrates: [There was no time for tears, when they needed me to be stronger than that]
-
Malcolm: [babbles]
Nancy: [gasps] Are you happy? Are you smiling at me?
Malcolm: [coos]
Nancy Narrates: [As I learned more about Malcolm, I began to notice just how alike we were. The same curious and thoughtful nature that was in his eyes was in mine too ]
Nancy: You’re so beautiful. Geoffrey, look! Malcolm is smiling!
Geoffrey: Of course he is! He loves looking at you. See, Nance? Things just take time. You’re doing great.
-
Nancy Narrates: [And as I learned more about my sons, I was beginning to feel like I could be a mother they deserved]
Malcolm: [coos]
Jonathan: Hi Mommy!
-
Summer: It’s so good to see you, cousin! You’ve been such a shut-in lately! And wow, you look amazing for having had two kids. Although... If you ever want a referral to my guy down in Del Sol Valley, he does wonders. You’d never believe I had a cesarean.
Nancy: Thank you, but I want to avoid going under the knife. I know that’s all the rave now.
Summer: Good for you, hon! Wow, he sure has a set of lungs on him!
Nancy: [sheepishly] He prefers me to hold him, it’s why I haven’t hired a nanny for the boys yet.
Summer: Not many women in your position take such attentive care of their children as you do, cuz. It’s admirable. I think you’re doing a wonderful job.
Nancy: You really think so?
Summer: Oh, of course! Look at me, for example. I’m the definition of a great mother. I raise my boys to be model citizens while my husband runs his own law firm.
Summer: If there was anyone that understands the sacrifices of being a mother, it’s me, Nancy. Landgraab women are built for it, believe it or not.
Nancy: I suppose that’s hard to believe at times considering my mother-
Summer: Oh. Well, Aunt Queenie isn’t a true Landgraab now, is she? She probably wishes she were you, Nancy.
Nancy: What?
Summer: You can’t compare a common woman who married into wealth to born royalty, cuz. Just saying.
Collin: Mom! Taylor pushed me in the mud!!
Taylor: I did not! He FELL!
Collin: No, you pushed me, dickhead!
Taylor: You’re the dickhead, loser!
Collin: SHUT THE HELL UP!
Summer: Ugh! The both of you, zip it! Maria! Maria!! The twins, por favor!
Summer: Summer: My god, I have to do everything! Nance, trust me, motherhood is a thankless job. It really is. My boys would be lost without me, you hear me? Yours are so lucky to have you. Nancy?
Nancy: [inhales sharply]
Nancy Narrates: [Don’t. Please don’t. I’ve worked so hard-]
Summer: [snaps fingers] Hello? Please clean this filthy child, Maria! Rápido! Anyway, what were we talking about?
-
[giggling]
Geoffrey: Then, the big dinosaur came and gobbled up all the little dinosaurs with his big, nasty dinosaurs teeth! Chomp chomp chomp!
Malcolm: [squeals]
Jonathan: He eat all of them, daddy?!
Geoffrey: Every. Single. Last. One!
Geoffrey: But then, the even bigger dinosaur came and ate him!
Malcolm: [gasps]
Jonathan: And then I eat him, Malcolm!
Malcolm: [giggles] Me too!
Geoffrey: Hey, save some dinosaurs for daddy!
Malcolm: Mama! Mama!
Jonathan: Hi Mommy! [whispers] Mommy can eat dinosaurs too, right? Even though she’s a girl?
Geoffrey: Everyone can eat them, especially mommies. [laughs] Hey, Nance. Rough night, huh? Come to bed. I’ll read another story.
Jonathan & Malcolm: YAY!
Nancy: What will you read us?
Geoffrey: How about I tell the story of the handsome king and his beautiful queen and their two silly, little princes?
Nancy: Does this story have a happy ending?
Geoffrey: [grins] It sure does.
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silassinclair · 8 months ago
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Yandere Wild West Outlaw x Reader
CW// Possession, Obsession, Yandere Behavior, Jealousy, Suggestive Content, Gaslighting, Maddox has a housewife fetish (16+)
Masterlist
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When Maddox first saw you hiding in your wardrobe after having killed your Father he was shocked to see such a pretty woman inside. He knew your Father had a daughter but he didn't know she'd be a fierce and beautiful young woman.
Maddox knew he had to have you. No way was he going to leave you in this bumfuck town in the middle of no where. You're too valuable.
He ties you up and takes you away from your hometown. You're his now so he's taking you with him wherever he goes. Having a pretty little accessory like you will give him bragging rights after all.
He takes you to saloons while he plays cards with his buddies. Has you sit still and look pretty on his lap while he drinks and plays. His friends say dirty things about you. Commenting on how submissive you are for Maddox. Maddox eats their comments up like a full course meal.
"You boys wish you had this fine piece of ass. But she's mine."
When you're at his temporary house he has you play housewife. You cook his food, clean his laundry, and most importantly you take him like a good girl and let him use you to pleasure himself.
"You like that yeah? You don't? Then shut your pretty little mouth n' take it anyway. Don't make me mad now."
But over the course of a few months and after spending more time with you he sees you less as an object to brag about and more as a companion. He sees you everyday so of course he develops feelings. Feelings he denies of course.
"You think cus' I'm being nice lately you can just skip doin' laundry? Well you've been a good girl this week so I'll let it slide... But you're doin' it tomorrow! No excuses!"
Maddox takes you to the saloon with him again as usual. This time the sexual comments his friends say make him see red. He draws his gun and shoots them all dead where they sit.
"I should have never let em' say that vulgar shit bout' you. Shoulda never let you in that shithole in the first fuckin' place. C'mon, we're goin' home."
Fucks you gently this time and prioritizes your pleasure over his. You're so cute mewling beneath him. Praises you instead of degrades you.
"You can take it princess, c'mon! Don't tell me to slowdown when I can feel how good you feel on me. Yeah that’s it, good girl. Doin’ so good for me… Ya’ feel divine~"
He slowly starts bringing you into town less often. When you ask why you can't come with him he simply says that you're safer at home.
A month goes by and you're tired of being holed up in his house. So you take the risk and leave while he's taking his afternoon nap.
Bad Choice….
"You thought you could leave me?! Baby I love ya', I really do but sometimes you're real fuckin' stupid."
Locks the doors, windows, and always has his eye on you. When he has to go out he keeps you tied to the bed by the ankle.
Every night he holds you close to him. He's a light sleeper, he'll feel if you move and try to escape him. If that happens he'll embrace you in a nearly bone crushing hug.
He’ll wrestle with you if you try and fight him, but he’ll never strike you. He’d never do that after seeing the abuse his Mother endured from her customers at the brothel.
Comes home one day with two golden rings. He wears one and forces the other onto your ring finger. It's a perfect fit.
"You're my wife now and I'm your husband. You'll address me as such, got it?"
No wedding, no priest, no judge, no documentation. He says you're his wife now and that's that.
"There's names engraved inside the rings.? That's just the name of the jeweler I got it from... Don't worry your pretty little head about it."
You two never get to settle down. You hop from one abandoned home to the other. After all he needs to always be on the run from the law. It's a stressful but exhilarating lifestyle. Danger lurks at every corner.
Loves calling you by his last name. Though your last name is still legally L/n; Maddox says that since you’re his wife you have his last name. After all you two are wearing the rings to prove it!
"Thank you for the meal Mrs. Graves, God you're perfect. Where have you been all my life?"
He adores your body. Doesn't matter what body type you have. Chub? He's kneading it with his hands while he praises you like the goddess you are. Insecure about how the outline of your ribcage is visible? He traces his fingers down to your tummy and then goes even lower... He can't keep his hands off.
Favorite thing to do is hug you from behind and just press your backside against him while you do chores. It feels so domestic and it makes him feel like he isn’t a wanted criminal for a moment.
Kisses? He loves to kiss you! His favorite spots are your ankles, tummy, and forehead. And your lips ofc!
Whenever you have to slip your stockings on he swats your hands away and does it. He’ll pull them up sensually and slowly, trailing kisses from your ankle up to your thigh as he does so.
“Your skin’s so soft princess, just wanna take a bite. You’ll let me right?”
He loves animals. His horse Jasper is his best friend. Jasper won't let anyone ride him except for you and Maddox. Anyone else gets thrown off and stomped on.
Since this is the 1800’s people don’t really bathe as often. But Maddox is different. He can’t stand having grime on him for too long after you called him stinky once. So now he bathes more often than most. And you bathe with him too. You have no choice in the matter.
“Mmm love it when you wash my hair sweetheart… Ya’ fingers feel like heaven..”
Maddox is a tough guy. He's taken bullets, stabs, you name it. He even survived a hanging once. If anything happens to you he'll fight God himself just to keep you safe. Even if it costs him his life.
"GET YA' MEATHOOKS OFF MY WIFE YOU FUCKIN' ANIMALS!"
Tells you he loves you everyday. And if you don't say it back? Well he'll just bug you until you say it. After your "marriage" he doesn't really punish you anymore. You’re his partner for life, you deserve the world.
Respects women. His Mother worked in a brothel so he witnessed how men mistreated women. He could never do that to you... Even though he did early in your relationship. But he'll never admit that! Bring it up and he'll call you crazy.
"Sweetheart I never harmed a hair on your head, quit talkin' nonsense."
Teaches you how to fire a gun just in case. Hopefully you'll never have to use the skill though.
Spoils you whenever he can. Maddox has a decent amount of money but it's still pretty tight. Buying you things isn't an option because being on the run means you need to have minimal baggage. So he treats you to dinners and cute little dates.
Overtime you get used to this life. You forget he ever even killed your old man.
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Anyone is free to request anything! Don't be shy! I'm hyperfixiating on this oc so I'll happily write anything for him. As long as it isn't blatant NSFW :-)
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thehighpriestess1 · 1 year ago
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Be Mine : The meeting
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Summary : After finally waiting for 20 years Gojo Satoru finally met the woman he has been in love with. But love is not easy to conquer even for the strongest.
Pairing : Yandere King Gojo x Knight reader
Warning: Yandere themes. Mentions of violence and death. Minors do not interact!
Master list : Ask Box
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It was not unusual for a woman to be a knight or a soldier. Although it was a bit unfair to those of your kind. In this kingdom were two kinds of people, one who had power, the sorcerers, not the kind of power that comes with a position but the kind you are born with. Power that is used to protect the others against the army of curses that have plagued the world for centuries. No one knows where these curses come from. No one knows how to eradicate them forever. But as goes the law of balance, there are people that are born with the power to kill these curses and the most powerful of them all, the man who is said to possess the kind of power that comes once in a century, the king, Gojo Satoru. 
The second kinds, your kind, people who are born without power. Even if they are born into the wealthiest of families they are bound to live in the shadows of sorcerers. You were neither born into a noble clan nor did you have any power. All you had was your strength and grit. 
You joined the forces to fight against the curses. What use were you to the kingdom without power? They always needed people like you to do the menial tasks during the war and use your sword to the best of your abilities. That you did very well. In a span of four years you climbed through the ranks fighting against the sexism and the casual disdain against you. It has changed you, hardened you. Now you were a rebel amongst legends and infamous amongst the infantry. 
But unbeknownst to you, there was someone who was watching your every move. Before the time you joined the ranks to the day of your knighthood. You were good. Fearless. Kind. But you were too far. Too far for his liking.The only way to fix that was to bring you closer to him. He wished he could reach out to you when he saw you on the battlefield. While he did protect you on the field with his powers, he wished desperately to be able to mend your wounds and kiss the pain away. But it was not ideal for the king to run across the battlefield and cradle a foot soldier. He wished he could lay next to you and wipe your tears but he could only watch from his ivory tower. It was the best use of his six eyes. When he was presented with the list of names to be considered for King’s knight he didn’t even look at it and presented his own recommendation. Who dared reject the king’s recommendation?
Gojo lay on the silk bed sheets as the moonlight filtered through the curtains. He stared at the ceiling with a smile on his face. Tomorrow he will finally have you close to him. He still remembered the first time he met you, 20 years ago. He was out in the kingdom with his father and had run off from the procession and snuck into a back alley of a bakery. There instead of sweet delicacies he ran into the sweetest girl he had ever seen. She sat at the steps of the bakery in a red dress with two pigtails with a white ribbon tied at the end. Gojo was dumbfounded and simply stared at her. Was she the fairies his mother told him about?
“ The bakery is closed! Come after 2 PM”. She said as she took a bite of her cupcake.
“What’s your name?”. He asked as he stepped towards her.
“My grandma told me not to talk to strangers”.
Gojo was dumbfounded. He stared at her blankly.
The girl rolled her eyes, “What do you want?”.
Gojo snapped out of his thoughts. “I…I want to buy…I want…I want what you are having”. 
She got off the steps and stood in front of him. She extended the half eaten cupcake and shrugged. “This is the last one and the bakery is closed”. 
Gojo stared at the cupcake, he had never eaten a half eaten cake. Heck he had never had to share anything in his life. But he stretched his arm forward to grab the cupcake and right before he could grab hold of the sweet delicacy the girl withdrew her arm and shoved the entire cupcake in her mouth. She grinned with lips littered with crumbs and mouth full of cupcakes. To his surprise instead of anger or contempt his heart was filled with this foreign feeling. It made him feel warm and he smiled at her.She was the embodiment of light, her toothy smile made his heart race and time stop. Before he could ask her name or give her his’ the guards surrounded him and led him back to his father. Before they could drag him away he stretched out his arm and grab hold of one of the silk ribbons.That’s all he had of hers now. For years Gojo tied that ribbon on his wrist. When it got too small for his wrist he tied it to his bedpost. The Kingdom grew and wars were won but he remembered the bakery and he remembered her. She never left his mind and once he was old enough to command power he had her details in front of her. Y/n L/n. 
-X-
Gojo stared at his reflection in the mirror. After two hours of going through an array of clothes, he finally decided on the staple navy blue with velvet red cape. He looked at the watch and realized there were still hours before the ceremony. It was getting harder for him to wait any longer, he had to see you once so he took the cape and the medals off and wore a long black trench coat and snuck out of his room.
He knew where all the to-be-guards would be waiting. He stood behind the curtains at the entrance and scanned the room for you but he didn’t see you. Did you refuse the position last minute? Did something happen to you on the way? He frowned and turned around to walk back to his room but stopped in his tracks when he saw you walking next to another man. Your hair was toed back neatly and your smile…it made time stop.But rage filled his nerves as she saw you laugh and punch the other man on the shoulder. Why were you touching him? Why was he making you laugh? Your silver batch, indicating your knighthood, shone brightly as you walked past him without sparing him another glance. His heart broke. You had forgotten him. He spent every day of the last 20 years thinking about you and you didn’t even remember him! Your scent lingered in the air as he stood there basking in it. Was he that forgettable? What was he going to do now? With anger in his eyes and sadness in his veins he was about to walk away.
“Oi!”. Someone called out from behind but Gojo was so lost in his thoughts he ignored it. 
“Oi white hair!”. 
Gojo frowned and clenched his jaw. Who dared speak to him like that. He turned around ready to order his men to behead the imbecile but his anger evaporated when he saw you standing behind him with a smirk on your face. You were talking to him. You were talking to him!
“Ye…Yes?”. He asked hesitantly. Unsure of whether you knew who he was or not.
“I owe you this''. You extended your hand forward and held a cupcake in your hand. 
Gojo stared dumbfounded at the cupcake. His heart raced faster than the best horses in the kingdom. You remembered him. All those years of planning to get you here was not a waste. You remembered him. He looked at you and let out a shuddered breath at how beautiful you looked. Your hair was in a neat ponytail above your head, even the metal armor you wore looked so delicate. Your eyes held the same hope and your smile, Gojo was ready to wage wars for that smile.
“You…you..remember me?”.
You chuckled, “Of course I do! Do you want this one or should I shove it in my mouth?”. 
Gojo chuckled and took the cupcake from your hand. “Thanks”. You looked different up close. Better. Prettier. You carried the same light within you as you did 20 years ago. 
“Are you here for the ceremony as well?”. You chirped.
“Yes…kind of”. 
You nodded your head and looked at him. He was just the same. Shy. Timid. “You have really pretty eyes''. You said absentmindedly. You didn’t know how the words fell out of your mouth but god were they true. 
Gojo’s eyes widened. You just complimented him? This was the first time you had complimented him! 
“Ummm yeah..thank..thank you”. He said, too shy to meet your eyes. He didn’t know what was happening to him. He wanted to be confident and strong for you and yet he was stuttering like a child.”What are you doing here?”. He feigned ignorance.
“I am about to be knighted to be the King’s personal guard”.
“Congratulations”. He smiled politely. 
“Thank you. What about you? I haven’t seen you in the ranks so…I guess you are not a knight”.
Gojo cursed himself mentally. “Umm yeah. I work in ….administration”. Not a lie, Gojo thought to himself.
“Nice.By the way, have you ever met the king? I’ve heard some pretty interesting things about him”. 
“No…I haven’t met the king..”. Gojo said, confused. Who was spreading rumors about him to you? Before he could ask any further about the baseless rumors another man came from behind him and wrapped his arms around you. 
“Niko! My man! So good to see you!”. You said as you returned the hug. 
Gojo watched you exchange formalities with Niko. When Niko had taken his leave you turned towards Gojo once again. “You were saying something?”.
“Is that guy your….man?”. 
You frowned and looked at Niko, “oh him? No. I mean not like that. We have been in the ranks together since the beginning and he has saved my ass so many times!”. 
Gojo smiled and looked down at his feet. If only you knew how many times he saved you from getting killed. “I see…what were you saying about the king?”. 
“Oh right! I have heard that he thinks only those with curse techniques deserve to occupy the ranks! Can you even believe him?! What a jerk! If that was true then people like me would always be treated like shit and would never get a chance to fight those curses!”. 
Gojo hummed. Though it was true that he believed that, you were here weren’t you? Though he believed it would never be acted on because he understood the importance of balance. “But..If that were true then…you wouldn’t be here”. 
“You see that’s where you’re wrong. It’s not about what he does. That fact that he says those things gives sorcerers even more reasons to..to bully us. Because now their ideology aligns with that of the king and the so called sorcerer king can never be wrong. What a joke!”. 
Gojo chuckled nervously. That stung Gojo. But you were right. It’s not only actions but also his words that have a ripple effect and eventually hurt the one he loves.
“But..wait…how do you know that I am not a sorcerer?”.
“I can tell”. Gojo added immediately, cursing himself. “Why did you join ranks?”. He asked immediately, hoping to change the conversation. Though he had a faint idea about it.
You smiled sadly,”You remember the bakery? It was owned by my grandmother. When the war began, the curses destroyed the town and ..killed her. So I decided that I will fight them until I am satisfied that I have avenged her”.
Gojo sighed. He remembered that war. Many died and many went missing. He was about 20 that time. The war had lasted for over a week and after a week he was able to create a shield around the kingdom to prevent any curses from getting in. He felt guilty now, if only he would have been strong enough back then he would have been able to save the bakery and you wouldn’t be risking your life everyday. “I’m sorry to hear that”. 
You sighed and shrugged. “That’s alright. Anyway we should go before the so-called ‘strongest’ arrives”. 
“I have something to take care of, you should go. I’ll see you soon”. 
“Okaaaay. What’s your name though? Or would you rather I call you snow white?”. 
Gojo smiled fondly and took a bite off the cupcake. “You can call me whatever you want”. He winked and turned around and walked aways. 
“Who was that?”. Niko asked you when you finally joined him and the others. 
“Just some nobel guy I met years ago”. 
“Ooooh you are fishing already?”. Niko smirked.
“Oh! Fuck off! I am just happy to make friends”.
“He seems weird”.
“Maybe, he was just nervous. It is a pretty important day”.
Amante, another woman in your ranks joined in, “I think he was quite handsome”. She smiled sweetly. But that was Amante, she was too sweet and too polite to be in this line of work.
Niko shrugged, “You know what they say about these noble guys right? They don’t last long in bed! His handsomeness alone is not enough”. 
You rolled your eyes at his comments. “Don’t listen to him, Amante. If you want I will happily introduce you to him and you are right, he is quite handsome”.
“Do you really think so?”. Niko asked, sipping from his chalice. He stood tall next to you, his brown hair neatly combed back and his sharp jawline freshly shaved. But from this angle you could tell the places he nicked himself. His brown eyes looked like honey in this light and though you would never admit it, you were jealous of his eyelashes.
“Yeah. I think he was quite good looking”. 
“Better than me?”. Niko smirked. 
You shook your head and ignored his comment. He was just being..Niko.
-X- 
It was a closed ceremony, only those to be knighted to be king’s guards were allowed to be there. The other ranks were commemorated by the chief of troops while you waited at the back and watched with pride as your friends got their lapel decorated. You wondered when it would be your turn and would you get to meet the king today? It came as a surprise that you were the only one appointed as the King’s guard, a non sorcerer vowing to protect the sorcerer king. Suddenly it didn’t feel right.
“Ma’am, he’s waiting for you”. 
You turned and looked at the older man bowing next to you. “Who is waiting for me?”. 
“His highness the King”. 
You blinked blankly and looked at your friends in the other end of the room. You nodded your head and got up to follow the man. 
You walked two steps behind the man wondering why was your coronation held separately and why couldn’t the king take some time off to know the people who swore to protect him a few rooms down the hall. 
“What’s your name?”. You asked, looking around and admiring the heavy velvet curtains.
“Ijichi”. The man replied in a tired tone. 
“How do I address you?”. 
“You may call me Ijichi”.
You hummed. “May I ask you a question Ijichi-san?”.
“Yes”.
“What is the king like?”.
“He is the strongest sorcerer”. 
You chuckled. That's what everyone says anyway. “I mean���as a person”.
Ijichi let out a tired sigh that made you wonder whether he didn’t like the king or he didn’t like you. “He is ..Eccentric”.
“Eccentric?”. You corked a brow.
“Yes. You will find out soon”. 
You didn’t want to trouble him anymore so continued to follow him quietly. 
Soon you found yourself outside a large wooden door with gold handles. Ijichi turned towards you and smiled, “His highness is waiting inside. If you need anything, you may call me anytime”.
“Thank you, Ijichi-san”.
“-and…The King is a good person. So don’t be hasty in making your judgment”. Ijichi smiled.
It was probably the first time you heard a little life in his voice. You smiled and nodded your head. “I’ll keep that in mind”. 
Ijichci took his leave and you stood outside the door staring at the gold inlay, wondering why would the strongest sorcerer appoint a non-sorcerer as the King’s guard?. Your heart was beating loudly and fear crept into your heart. You fought curses with just your sword and yet you were questioning yourself, it didn’t make any sense. 
“I can sense you standing outside”. The voice echoed from inside making you jolt backwards. He knew you were here. There was no going back now.So you took a deep breath and pushed the door open. 
“Snowwhite?”. You chuckled as you saw the back of the head of your old friend but when he turned around your smile dropped and eyes widened. You saw the medals on his lapel and the seal on his collar. Your eyes drifted to the crown kept on a stand nearby and your throat ran dry. You immediately kneeled on one knee and brought your fist to your heart and bowed in greeting to the king. “Your Highness”.
“Stand up, y/n”.
You got up but refused to look him in the eye. You could sense that he was walking towards you and suddenly the rose on the carpet was covered by a pair of black boots. 
Gojo placed his index finger below your chin and tilted it up, to look closely at the face he has been dreaming about. “Hello, y/n”.
You took a step back and stomped your feet. “It’s an honor to meet you, your highness”.
Gojo sighed, “Drop it already, will you?”.
You looked up at him, confused. “I..don’t understand you-”.
“Drop the formalities. We are friends. You can call me Satoru”.
You bit the inside of your cheeks. “I..I am sorry your highness…for..what I said”.
“Why? You were right”.
“I..meant the terms I used to describe you..”
Gojo laughed. “That’s alright. You are my friend so that’s okay”.
“I am supposed to be your guard, your highness”. You said sternly.
Gojo realized it will take time for you to open up to him, he had waited years now, he could wait a little more.
“Alright, do what feels right for you. If you have any questions then do not hesitate to ask me”. Gojo smiled as he clasped his hands behind his back.
“I do have one…question”. 
“Go ahead”.
“Why did you choose me to be your guard? I am not a sorcerer and you are the strongest sorcerer”.
Gojo smiled to himself. He had expected this question which is why he prompted you to ask in the first place. “Because you are capable. You are more capable than some of the sorcerers. It is not the curses I need the protection from, it is non-sorcerers”.
His response left a bittersweet feeling in your heart. “I don’t have any more questions, your highness”.
“Are you sure?”. Gojo corked a brow.
“Yes, Your Highness”.
“So you don’t want to know what I was doing at the bakery that day and why do I remember you?”.
You were taken by surprise. You had heard of his powers but many were still hidden, was mind reading one of his powers?. Regardless, you were determined to keep things professional between the two of you, you had already offended him enough. “Your Highness is kind enough to remember me”.
Gojo’s jaw clenched in irritation. This was not his kindness. This was his love. You were his love. But of course how could you know that? For you, you had met him after two decades. Unlike him you were not aware of his life. “It’s more than kindness y/n. You were the second person ever to treat me like an equal. I consider you my friend and friends , protect each other”.
You smiled politely, “Yes, Your Highness”.
Gojo smiled and straightened up. “Let’s get to business shall we?”.
“Yes, Your Highness”.
“First things first, I do not place much value on the old rituals of reading out your duties and having you take the oath. You are an honorable woman and I trust you that you will do your duty diligently”.
You stomped your right foot and pressed your fist to your heart, “Yes, Your highness. I promise you I will put my life on the line for-”.
“Everything except that”. Gojo cut you off. “I don’t want you to put your life on the line for me. Do not even think about sacrificing your life for me. Just stay by my side and…that’s it”.
You gulped nervously. “Ye..Yes, Your Highness”.
“Now, where were we?...right! You don’t need to wear that heavy armor anymore. I have asked the atelier to take your measurement and have your uniform ready. Ijichi will show you your room after your fitting, you can rest today and explore the palace grounds, in the evening we will meet at the stable where you will get to pick your horse, then you will join me for dinner. Is that clear?”.
“Yes, You-”.
“Just a yes will do”.
“Ye..yes. Clear”.
Gojo smiled. “Good. Tomorrow you will show up at my office at 7:00 AM and accompany me throughout the day”.
“Yes”.
-X-
You walked towards his office in your newly fitted uniform. It was eerily similar to his’. Navy trousers paired with a white shirt and a heavy navy blue overcoat. Your Knight’s badge shone on the left lapel and your cufflinks were just like his’. You wondered if it was on his demand or was just a norm. But your favorite part of the uniform were the stitched white roses on the inside of the overcoat. Absolutely hidden from the outside world, they were your own personal ornament. Your horse too was the same as his. A beautiful white beast with flowing silver hair. When standing side by side it was hard to differentiate between the two horses. When you asked Ijichi, he informed you that the other horse, the female counterpart, was bred and trained to be a companion to the male counterpart and Gojo had forbidden everyone from riding it. A part of you thought that he was saving her for you but that can’t be true right? How was he to know that you would meet after all these years. It was a surprise that he even remembered you.
Even your old sword was replaced with a newer one. To fight the curse, every non-sorcerer needed a special blade which needed to be pierced in the head of the curse to eradicate it. As the soldier moved up the ranks the sword was replaced by a more powerful one. As a King’s personal guard you were sure this was the most powerful blade to exist. But fighting alone was not enough. To protect yourself from the attack, you had a shield embedded in your amulet. All you needed to do was unclasp the lock on your inner wrist and a tiny amulet was turned into a full sized shield. Your new amulet was made out of white gold and had roses carved into them. It made a pretty shield. 
Your room was thrice the size of your old house. It was too spacious and you couldn’t believe that it was all yours. Everything from the carpet to curtains was made out of finest quality material. Your bed was soft as a cloud and your wardrobe was filled with your uniforms for different occasions. Your tattered leather bag seemed out of place in this opulence. You walked to the window and to your surprise you could see right on the King’s balcony. Maybe it was a security measure. You thought about him, how he treated you like an old friend even after all the things you said about him. He was not how others, especially Niko, had painted him out to be. He wasn’t aggressive, or crazy. He was gentle, Kind, and considerate. You didn’t realize you were staring at his balcony until he walked out and you immediately stepped back, hoping he didn’t notice you.
After a long sleepless night of thinking you decided that it would be best to stick to your rules rather than obey  his’. He might be kind and considerate but he was still a King, a sorcerer king, and a sorcerer and non-sorcerer can never be friends. You had never hated sorcerers. Not until the war. When you saw your grandmother lying unconscious on the floor you developed a deep seeded hatred for sorcerers. If only this was a world without sorcerers and curses then your grandma would still be alive. You joined the ranks because the only thing you hated more than sorcerers was curses.
You knocked on the door sternly, “Your Highness, may I enter?”. You asked. You could almost hear him sigh on the other end before granting you the permission to enter.
“I told you not to call me that”. He chuckled and shook his head. He sat behind the oak desk resting his chin on his knuckles.
“That’s the appropriate way to address-”.
“”I decide what is appropriate”. Gojo cut you off. 
“As you say, your highness”. You smiled and took your place next to him. You stood with your hands pressed to your sides and your gaze fixed on the door in front. 
“Are you going to stand all day?”.
“Yes”.
“What if I ask you to sit?”. He looked up at you.
“I can best react to a threat in this position”.
Gojo bit the inside of his cheeks, “Threat? What threat is there now?”.
“A threat does not extend an invitation…not even to the king”.
Gojo clenched his jaw. Who turned you against him? Everything was fine yesterday, whom did you meet? What did they say?. He frowned and cleared his throat. “I don’t need you to protect me”.
“I see”. You hummed. “So I am just an accessory here”. 
Gojo stood up immediately and turned you towards him. By protocol, you refused to meet his eyes. He placed an index finger below your jaw and tildted your head up, ��Look at me”. He whispered.
You slowly lifted your gaze up and looked into his deep blue ones. “I apologize for my rudeness ,your highness”.
“Did someone say something to you?”.
“No, your highness”.
“Y/n… I want you to remember that no one, in this entire kingdom holds any power over you. No one can remove you from my side, not without my permission…and that I would never grant. So tell me now, what happened?”.
“Nothing happened, your highness”. You said, it was hard to avert your gaze from his eyes. They were hypnotic, like they held the secrets buried deep beneath the oceans. If you looked long enough, you were sure you could count each speckle. They changed color when he moved his head, you had never seen anything of such beauty. You had heard about the secrets of six eyes, the power they held. But now you wondered, maybe their biggest power is their beauty. Anyone who looks deep enough would find themselves trapped in the infinite void. 
“Y/n,?”. Gojo called out to you, snapping you out of your thoughts.
You jolted and stepped back immediately, “I apologize, your highness!”.
“What were you thinking?”. Gojo asked, sitting on the edge of the table.
“Nothing, your highness!”.
“I order you to tell me the truth”. Gojo smiled. If you were going to abide by the protocol then so would he.
“I..I just..You have beautiful eyes, your highness!”. You declared like you were rallying a message instead of speaking your mind.
Gojo smiled to himself. It was the second time you had complimented his eyes.. “You have told me that already but thank you. Now I order you to speak freely to me. Tell me every thought that crosses your mind, is that clear?”.
“Yes..your highness!”. 
Gojo raised a brow and tilted his head, indicating you to speak up.
“Firstly, I am sorry for what I said to you yesterday outside the hall. Clearly I did not know whom I was talking to. Secondly….”. You bit the inside of your cheeks. Your rebel attitude might have gotten you far in troops but this is the King you are talking to. He can blow a hole through your body.
“Secondly?”. Gojo asked.
Aahh well fuck it. If you die then you die speaking the truth. “It was your fault!”. 
“My fault?”. Gojo asked, confused. 
“Yes! What were you doing there? Why were you sneaking around in your own palace? Are you that bored? Why didn’t you tell me that you were the king? Or were you spying on me? Did you have fun teasing me?”. You blurted out in one breath, prepared to take your last any minute now. 
Gojo chuckled. Then he laughed. “Wow…okay. You’re right. It was my fault. I apologize”. 
Your breath hitched and you looked around hesitantly. Did he just… Did the king just apologize? To you?
“What else is bothering you?”. He asked.
You scoffed, “I didn’t realize this was a therapy session”. 
Gojo chuckled. “This is…get to know my guard session”. 
“Speaking of guards…I know why I am here. By your side”. 
Gojo’s heart skipped a beat. Did you really…
“Why is that?”.
You took a deep breath, “I heard the counsel talking … while I was going back to my room. I didn’t mean to snitch! And I am not complaining either!”.
“What..what did they say?”. Gojo asked irritatedly. He hated the counsel, always breathing down his neck, interfering with his work, demanding answers, but above all he hated them because of their mindset. Now he had another reason on his list.
“Well…They said that the only reason you chose me was because if you had chosen someone more powerful..a sorcerer then it would have become easier for them to keep you in line. So to keep them at bay you chose me because of my reputation but also because I am of absolute no use to you..”. You looked down at your hands clasped in front. “…or anyone actually”. 
Gojo gritted his teeth. Those rotten old raisins dared make you feel this way. He was going to avenge you. It was only fair. He sent a signal, invisible to your eyes and sat back in his chair. “Take your position, we are going to punish them”. Gojo winked.
“But you don’t even know who they were. I don’t even know they were”.
“Only two people will have the audacity to say something like that”. 
Soon two men walked in with their heads bowed down. “Your highness”. 
You watched them keenly. It was definitely them. But you wondered what Gojo would do. 
“Hizashi-san! I have good news for you!”.
The taller one out of the two straightened up. “Your highness you have honored me enough”. The old man smiled politely. He looked at you sideways and Gojo wanted to gouge his eyes out.
“Clearly not enough, Hizashi-san”. Gojo added. “Would Hizashi-san and Kyoshi-san appreciate the opportunity to help  advance our understanding of curse techniques?”. 
The other man stood up and looked at Gojo wide eyed. The last time Gojo had presented this opportunity to someone, That man was sent on a tour around the world and became a millionaire overnight. No one would dare refuse this opportunity.
The two men exchanged glances. Having been partners in crime for over two decades the two of them had the same vision in mind, leave the conservative kingdom and their annoying families behind and travel the world to meet exotic women! All they had to do in return was write a small thesis which they could fake because who was going to verify it anyway. They agreed right away and after discussing other small matters with him they left with a satisfied smile on their faces.
“I didn’t think you would reward them”. You commented with a sour taste in your mouth.
Gojo chuckled. “No. I did not reward them. Tonight when my soldiers will go to pick them up, they will be expecting to be led to the royal ship and begin their world travel. I am sure they would soon spread the news and before lunch everyone would know about it. But my soldiers will not lead them to the royal ship”.
You bit the inside of your lip, “Where will they be going then?”.
“They will be led to a dungeon outside the palace walls, where they will be thrown in with curses”.
“But they are sorcerers, experienced sorcerers?”.
“I am sure you are aware that even sorcerers have grades, the curses they will come across will be far beyond their imagination. I can assure you they won’t survive the torture till morning”.
“Torture?!”. You gasped.
Gojo smiled. Your innocence was sweeter than any honey head tasted. “Not every curse wants to ..kill. Some just want revenge from humans that created them. Death is too easy of a punishment for such…people”.
-X-
You lay awake at night in your bed. Thinking about how Gojo just condemned two people to death by torture only because they insulted you. You couldn’t sleep, thinking about the two men, who would now be on their way to death, blissfully unaware, excited by the prospects ahead of them. It dawned on you that the curses were not the that would torture them, it was Gojo. You groaned in your pillow. You needed a drink. 
The communal kitchen was open at all hours of the day. It was mostly used by guards looking for a late night snack after the night shift or sleepless guards who needed a drink to wash away the events of the day. You remained quiet as you poured the wine from a wooden flask into a glass. It was strictly against the rules to take away any eatables and wine back to the room but you were oh so tempted to take the entire flask back to your room. So you did. The rules be damned. 
If you had the ability to sense curse energies then the surprise awaiting you would have been spoiled and maybe you could have saved the flask of wine. But as soon as you opened the door, you saw the white haired sorcerer standing near your window with his hands behind his back, and the flask slipped from your hand, spilling the wine between the two of you, creating a small puddle of red. “Your Highness! I..I didn’t get your summon!”.
Gojo shifted his gaze from the puddle of wine to you. “Tough night?”. He smiled.
“I’m sorry. I know it is against the rules but I..needed something strong. I was going to return the flask! I swear!”. 
Gojo chuckled. “I understand. But now I feel guilty for ruining your plans”. He smiled.
“Oh no. I..I can clean it up in no time”. You rubbed the back of your neck. “Did you need anything, Your Highness?”.
Gojo suddenly realized that he did need a reason to see you. He couldn’t tell you that it was getting tough for him to sleep without you.”Oh! Right! I uh..I could not sleep either …..so..I..do you want to drink together?”.
“Now?”. You asked, wide eyed. There were no rules about drinking with the king so maybe it was allowed..
“Yes. I can get someone to clean up your room”.
You bit your lip nervously as you considered the offer. “I don’t know…I have to work tomorrow and…”.
“I am sure I can convince your boss to let you arrive a little late”. Gojo smiled his victory smile which left a fluttering feeling in your stomach. In moments like this it didn’t feel like he was the king. He felt like a friend. You liked that feeling.
-X-
You sat on the floor with Gojo, your head resting against the couch, giggling like long lost friends. One empty bottle of wine and one half filled bottle stood tall between the two of you.
“Tell me more about your life”. Gojo prompted.
“It is quite boring”. You added and took a sip from the crystal glass.
“Not to me”.
"Are you that bored of your life?”. You raised a brow.
“Not bored of my life, just interested in yours”.
“Well then, what would you like to know?”.
Gojo hummed and thought for a second, “Have you ever been married?”. Gojo asked. He knew the answer to that but he couldn’t ask directly if you had a boyfriend.
Your smile dropped for a second and Gojo’s heart sank. “I didn’t mean to-”.
“It’s fine”. You cut him off with a smile. “It was quite long ago so it doesn’t matter anymore”. You shrugged and took a sip. 
“So you were….married?”. 
“Engaged. Well..almost engaged”. 
Gojo’s heart was now beating loudly against his chest. How did he miss this?. “Why not, completely engaged?”. He asked, trying to keep his anger out of his words.
“Well because the guy…he cheated on me”.
“What?!”. Gojo frowned. How could he miss such an important detail? Who was this vermin who caused you so much pain?
“Yeah. We were together for quite some time but we managed to keep it hidden from everyone around us. When I decided to join the ranks he…didn’t like it. We had plans, you see. We wanted to work together to save enough money and re-build the bakery, get married, and all the other rosy-dosy stuff. I wanted to join the ranks because building the bakery was not enough for me. I wanted to avenge my grandma. Anyway, One day I returned from my training and found him with one of my friends..and I knew I couldn’t stay there anymore”. You took a deep breath and sniffled. “So I left the place and stayed with the troops and here I am”. 
Gojo remained silent. He knew you were currently in a legal battle with a man over the bakery but he did not know that this was the back story. He could have the bakery renovated and signed over to you before the sun rises but that would only drive you away. He wanted you to share these things with him so he could freely help you and gain your trust. “What happened to the bakery?”.
You swallowed painfully. “He took it from me. When I left, he forged the papers and took the bakery from me. He comes from a strong clan and I couldn’t do anything. I filed a case two years ago and there have hardly been four hearings”. You gave a defeated shrug, “It is highly unlikely it will go in my favor”.
Gojo hummed. Now he could make his move. 
“Enough about me, If I may be bold enough to ask, have you ever been in love, your-highness?”.
Gojo smiled to himself, “Yes. I have. In fact I am still in love with her”.
For some reason, the last part left a bitter feeling in your heart. You felt sad. But you shook it off to too much wine. “And..will we be getting a queen soon?”.
Gojo chuckled. “It is not going to be easy. I am not sure whether she feels the same”. 
“Who can reject you?”. You spoke almost too immediately, making Gojo laugh. 
“You think so?”. 
“Yes! I mean.. You seem like a good person and you are…good looking and of course you are the king”.
“The problem is that I am the king”.
You straightened up immediately and looked at him wide-eyed. “Is she a commoner? Or from a different kingdom?”.
“She is not from a different kingdom”. Gojo added.
“Wow!..you are in love with a commoner”.
“She is not a commoner either”. Gojo chuckled. He was having too much fun teasing you.
You frowned and looked confused. “So..if she is a noble-woman then what’s the problem? You can just go up to her and tell her that you love her”.
“Can I really do that?”. Gojo took a sip and looked at you from behind the rim of the glass. 
Even though you were slightly drunk, you were sure you felt the atmosphere shift. His voice turned an octave lower and the way he looked at you left your nerves tingling.
“I mean..yeah..Only a fool would reject such an offer”. You stuttered. 
“I want her to love me but not because I am the king”.
“Wow..you are really something. Respect!”.
Gojo threw his head back and laughed. 
“Wait! Is that why you appointed me? So you could ask me for tips to impress a woman? Oh my god your-highness!”. You laughed and shook your head. “Such a terrible decision!”. You shook your head and continued to laugh.
Gojo looked at you, it had been years since he last laughed like this. Since he was this happy. He watched your curly dance in the air as you shook your head, how your lips were tainted wine red and he was sure they would taste heavenly, the blush on your cheeks had his head spinning. He couldn’t believe that this was finally happening. He had waited twenty years for this moment and he was glad he did. 
“Alright, Your highness, I should leave now. Can’t be drunk and sleep deprived on duty”. You began to stand up and Gojo followed. Blood rushed to your head and dark spots lined your vision and you tripped backwards but instead of falling back you balanced yourself in the last second, leaving Gojo’s arm hanging behind you. “Woopsie! Sorry about that”. You chuckled and kept your glass on the side table. 
Gojo smiled and shook his head. Sometimes he forgot that this is all new for you. He had to be cautious and earn your trust the right way. One wrong move can push you away and he could not afford that. “Goodnight, y/n”.
“Goodnight, your-highness”.
Gojo stood on his balcony, leaning against the marble railing and sipping the last of wine but from your glass. Somehow it tasted sweeter. He watched your window keenly, waiting for you to reach. When the lights flicked on, he smiled to himself. He waited until the lights turned off and walked back in with a smile on his face.
-X-
The sun shone bright in the sky as you and Gojo sat under the shade of the tent and watched other soldiers spar. It was part of the regular training and it was his duty as the King to be present and motivate the soldiers. You sat next to him in a less ornamented chair and watched keenly. Few years ago you had been one of them, though you doubted if Gojo ever came to see you fight. But regardless, two hunks sparing was a sight to behold. Yes you were on duty but you could indulge in some eye candy. The soldiers fought in only loose trousers hanging low on the hip, you watched as their muscles flexed and relaxed under the sun.
“Y/n..”. Gojo called out to you but you seem distracted. “..y/n!”. He called out again and you snapped your head in his direction. 
“Yes! Your-highness!”.
“Enjoying the show?”. Gojo asked, frowning at the slight blush on your cheeks.
“Who wouldn’t?”. You retorted. 
Gojo bit the inside of his cheek and nodded. He turned his head towards the soldiers and cursed himself for bringing you here. What was he thinking, letting you watch half-naked soldiers brawl with each other?  He stood up and started unbuttoning his coat. 
You stood up behind him, “Your-highness, what are you doing?”.
“I think it would be really motivating for the troops to see me fight, don’t you agree?”. Gojo smirked as he handed you the coat and began unbuttoning his shirt. 
“I don’t think that’s a good idea”.
“Why not?”. Gojo asked, struggling with one particular button.
“It can be dangerous”.
Goojo paused and stared at the ground. It was a massive hit on his ego. You thought him to be weak. “What did you say?”.
You sucked in a sharp breath and clutched his coat in your hand. “I..I mean that, you are a sorcerer and these men are not. It wouldn’t be a fair fight”.
“Who said that I was going to use any curse techniques?” He frowned. 
You could sense that you had offended him to some degree but there was no going back. He had an innate ability to sense lies and you did not want to risk lying on top of insulting him. “These men have relied only on their capabilities and strength to survive on battlefields. That’s all they know”.
Gojo hummed. “Pick one”.
“Pick one..what?”.
Gojo turned towards you with his shirt half buttoned and you had to fight every instinct to not avert your gaze. “Pick the strongest soldier”. 
“I don’t think that’s a good-”.
“y/n…Pick one.Now”. Gojo spoke sternly.
You remained silent, your quick tongue had gotten you into this place. You stared at him blankly, hoping that he would give up his pursuit soon. “You are the strong-”.
“Y/n!”. Gojo yelled, you flinched, everyone stopped and stared.
You let out a shuddered breath and looked at the row of soldiers, standing tall with their hands behind their back. Each of them seemed capable, yet your eyes landed on the one at the very end. He was almost as tall as Gojo and twice his size.You were unsure if you should really pick him or go for someone slightly weaker. But, Gojo had caught your gaze, he looked at the man and smiled like a devil. “Him? You think he is the strongest?”.
“Ye–yes, your-highness”. You admitted.
Gojo hummed and gestured for the man to step forward. He removed his shirt over his head in one quick motion and threw it on the chair. When you saw just how physically fit he was, it felt like someone punched all the air out of you. Who, in a million, years would have guessed that this existed beneath all those layers of clothes. Sure he was tall and broad but who could have guessed that he was this fit? You had spent years in camps with some of the strongest men in the kingdom but you knew now that they didn’t call him the strongest for his curse techniques alone. When Gojo stood opposite to the other soldier, you suddenly felt bad for the poor man. Gojo not only, towered over the man but also there was hardly any difference in their physical form.
They shook hands and bowed curtly and began. You were erect in your place, like a statue of a shell-shocked woman. As you watched Gojo deflect and attack in the same breath you wondered if it was even possible to do so.It was a move you had tried many times but failed to perfect and Gojo did it like it was as easy as breathing .The dust from the ground now clung to his skin and when the two men locked hands you knew it was over for the other guy. You realized…witnessed the difference between size and strength. Though you were no sorcerer, it was evident that Gojo was not using any curse techniques. Everything was raw and real. You could see the other soldier struggling to retain balance as Gojo landed one attack after another, hardly letting the other man catch his breath. The soldier was getting angry too, you could tell it was a matter of self respect for him as well and he was really giving it his all.You looked at Gojo and swallowed painfully, He was angry .A gust of wind had you covering your eye with the back of your hand to shield it from the dust, when the wind settled and you brought your hand down, you heard cheering and clapping. Amidst the cloud of dust you saw Gojo walking towards you, he had no expression on his face. He wasn’t happy that he won. People were cheering for him and yet it didn’t faze him. He refused to look at you and took the coat from your hand and walked away.
“Your-highness!”. You yelled as you chased after him. He didn’t even bother to look back as you ran through the corridors after him. “Your-highness!”. You huffed as you caught up to him but he refused to stop and kept walking. You tried your best to keep up with his long strides but it wasn’t easy. He had never walked this fast. “I..I apologize for my-“. 
Before you could finish that sentence, with one flick of his finger Gojo shut the door on your face. You stepped back and stared at the door. He was mad at you. “Fuck”. You muttered under your breath and took your place outside the door. 
Gojo rested his head against the rim of the marble tub and closed his eyes. His anger was slowly fading away with the ache in his muscle. He had to do it, he thought to himself, he had to show you that he wasn’t physically weak only because he had cursed techniques. It hurt him that you undermined him. It hurt him that you thought he needed protection when it was his job to protect you. He remembered the glint in your eyes as you saw the men fight, it was only natural for a fellow soldier to admire and respect the strength of others but it hurt him. Only he deserved to be admired by you. It hurt him to not see you the entire day, but he couldn’t. He couldn’t bear the look of admiration for another man in your eye. 
Gojo stepped on the balcony in his velvet robe and looked at your window, the lights were off. It was well past dinner time and usually this was the time you would be in your room, reading a book. Then why are your lights off? Why weren’t you in your room? Were you out with someone else? Your friend, Niko? Or one of the men you met today? His blood boiled and he stormed out of his room and walked down the hallway connecting his bedroom and office through a back door. He was hoping to find you in the office, waiting for him with a bottle of wine but he found the office just as dark and empty as your bedroom. He sighed and ran his hands through his hair.His mistakes finally caught up to him and now he couldn’t shake off the look on your face when he yelled at you. He closed his eyes shut and cursed himself, he treated you badly. He realized that now. He had to apologize to you, He had to correct his mistakes.He was about to send a signal to locate you when he heard a faint noise coming from the other side of the door.
Gojo walked slowly towards the door, immediately turning on his infinity. He pressed his palm flatly against the wood, trying to catch a hint of curse energy but found nothing. He frowned and slowly opened the door. 
“Your-highness!”. You straightened up immediately when you saw Gojo through the crack in the door.
“Y/n?”.Gojo frowned. “Yes, your-highness!”.
Gojo opened the door completely and looked either way but found no one. “What..what are you doing here?”.
You bit your lip nervously as you tried to keep your eyes away from his partially exposed chest. Now that you had seen him, it was hard to not imagine what lies underneath the robe. “You haven’t dismissed me yet, your-highness?”.
Gojo opened his mouth to say something but shook his head, “You..you have been here all day..because I didn’t dismiss you for the day?”.
“Yes,your-highness!”.
Gojo’s heart sank to his stomach. He looked at you, even in the dim lights, he could tell you were tired. “You are dismissed for the day”. Gojo added. He could see your posture relax as you indeed and gave a curt bow. 
“Goodnight, your-highness”. You turned around to walk away but Gojo was quick to grab your wrist.
“Stay”. He said. 
You turned around, and glared at him,”Why?”.
Gojo let go of your wrist and took a deep breath. “Have dinner with me”. 
“Is that an order?”. 
Gojo sighed, “No. It’s a..request”.
You raised a brow, “It didn’t sound like one”.
“Will you…please…have dinner with me?”. Gojo asked, hesitantly. This was probably the fourth time in his life he had to request something. 
“Are you still mad at me?”. Gojo asked, as he watched you finish your second bowl of rice”.
“Yes”. You replied, not looking at him and leaning over to grab the bowl of soup. 
“Why?”. Gojo whined and slid the soup bowl towards you.
“You yelled at me!”. You said, slamming the bowl on the table
“You undermined me in front of everyone”. Gojo added.
“I didn’t undermine you. I was just protecting you. That’s my job!”. You replied, while struggling to open the bottle of wine.
“No! You..you thought that I was not strong enough!”. Gojo grabbed the bottle from you and opened it in one go.
“And you proved me wrong so congratulations you won!”. You huffed, pouring the wine in two goblets.
“Then why are you still mad at me?!”.
“Because…you slammed the door in my face, refused to listen to me, and made me stand out there all day!”.
Uncomfortable silence lingered in the air. Gojo could see how hurt you were and it pained him. He didn’t touch his food because he was convinced that he didn’t deserve to eat.
“I..I’m sorry.. I should not have done that”. Gojo said.
“It’s not like it matters anyway”. You bit your lip and looked away from him.
“It does. It hurts me that I have hurt you. So please forgive me y/n. Tell me how do I make it up to you?”.
You looked at him with a frown on your face and then it hit you. Your frown turned into amusement and you stood up slamming your palm on the table, “Train with me!”. 
“What?”. Gojo chuckled.
“If you want to make it up to me then train with me”. You shrugged.
Gojo threw his head back and laughed.Were you really asking him to physically brawl with him? Like he could even bring his body to attack you. .“That’s not possible”. He added, shaking his head.
“Why not?”. You leaned forward, slamming your fist on the table. “If you can spar with those men then why not with me?”.
“Because..you are..you!”.
You poked your cheek with your tongue and nodded your head as you sat back down. “I see. Is it because you are the King?”.
Gojo looked at you, he wished he could tell you that it was because he cannot bring himself to hurt you even if it was for practice. “Yes..”.
You hummed in response. Obviously a King could not just train with you. It didn’t make any sense and you felt silly for even asking, “I guess then I will have to ask one of those men to train with me. I can’t-”.
“But I will make an exception for you!”. Gojo cut you off. The moment you said that his mind went into a frenzy. Another man sparring with you? Touching you? Throwing you on the ground? No. No. No. This was the perfect chance for him to get close to you.
“Seriously? Would you really?”. You asked, wide-eyed and excited.
“Yes. If it means that you forgive me”.
You smiled widely, “forgive you for what? You didn’t do anything wrong! You are the best King ever!”. You squealed with excitement.
Gojo laughed at how adorable you were. He rested his chin on his hand and watched you excitedly drink wine.  “So you agree that I am strong?”.
“Oh! Don’t even get me started on that! I don’t usually enjoy being proven wrong but I was pleasantly surprised!”.
Gojo watched with a satisfied smile as you went on to describe every move he made animatedly and how you wished you could do that instead. He didn’t even need to touch his wine to get drunk. Your words, your eyes, your smile was more intoxicating than all the wine of of the Kingdom combined.
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justmymindandstuff · 4 days ago
Text
Desire - Robb Stark X WifeReader
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summary: Your life is perfect. You are happily married to your husband Robb Stark and gave birth to your first son a few moons ago. But since then things have changed between you. You miss your husbands touches but after you told him about your worries he shows you how wrong you are.
words: 6.132
warnings: self-doubt, discomfort, smut (oral f receving, fingering, p in v sex), pregnancy Kink (kind of/ mention), Porn with Plot ,fluff, 18 +,MDNI
as always english is not my first language, no beta reader so all mistakes are mine //No use of Y/N // Hope you have fun with this // AO3
requests are open // main-masterlist // GoT-masterlist
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You sigh and look back in the mirror in front of you, you turn to the side a few times to look at yourself from as many angles as possible. Then another sigh. Your son babbles in his cradle next to you. You give him a smile. He would soon see his fourth moon. You can't imagine what life was like before him, or maybe you don't want to. The last years have been marked with war, loss, mourning, fear and suffering. First the Lions, then the Others. But you've been through all this, you and your husband, Robb Stark, King of the North. You wipe your black hair out off your face.
The minute it was clear that you are a girl, your father, King Robert, engaged you to the heir of his best friend. You knew all your life that you were going to be Robb's wife, and at age seven, you were sent to Winterfell to live here as Neds ward. You were supposed to become Lady Stark of Winterfell, but then your father died, the truth about your (half)siblings came out, and for Robb and you all this brought the crown of the North. You were dragged into this terrible game of thrones, had to forge alliances, foresee the intrigues of your enemies, and were faced with so many impossible choices. Who do you trust? Who can help you? Who will betray you? You remember with an unpleasant feeling the cold night in the harbour, the wind blowing outside the windows and in a few hours you would sail off to Dragonstone. "Do you want the throne my love?" Robb had whisperd into the night. You lay naked and tightly wrapped around eachother in the uncomfortable bed, his seed was still sticking to your thighs, and when he asked, everything in you was drawn together. You are the only living, legitimate child of your father, his throne, the Iron Throne, is actually yours. "No. Give it to the Dragon Queen, for her help and the independence of the North." The Dragon Queen accepted your offer, and when all the armies of the North and the Riverlands, the Unsullied, the Droharki and three Dragons stood before King's landing, it was over. The city had already opened the gates and ringed the bells. Tywin Lannister could do nothing but lose his head. Then you have turned your armies to the north, just in time to defeat the Night king.
A knock at the door trear you away from your thoughts of the past. "Come in." the door opens and Catelyn enters.
"Hello, Dear," she says in a warm voice, smiling at you. "How are you?"
"Good," you answer, and it's not even a lie. You have a perfect husband, a healthy son and a great family. What more could you wish for? Your mother-in-law is smiling at you.
"Robb is back soon the banners are already on the horizon," she tells you.
You can feel your heart beating faster when you think of your husband. After all these years, mentioning his name is enough, and you feel like a love-sick teenager again. Robb had been in Karhold to attend Lady Karstark's wedding. The journey would have been too long for your son, and you didn't want to be separated from him for so long. So Robb left with a heavy heart without you.
"Finally," you say, and then you take Catelyn's hand. "Thank you again for helping me so much over the last few weeks. I know I have neglected my duties as a queen."
"You're now a mother Dear." her gaze goes to the crib and a sparkling enters her eyes as she looks at her first grandson. "Of course, there are shifts in priorities. That's normal."
You nod, even if you're feeling bad anyway. During Robb's absence, it would have been your job to take care of the North and Winterfell, but your thoughts are always with your little son.
"If you want I can take little Ed for a few hours?" your mother in law asks. "You and Robb were separated for a long time."
Your ears are getting red because you know exactly what she means. "That's not necessary." you say and smile. It's not like you don't trust Catelyn with Eddard but it's really not necessary.
Catelyn smiles. "I was once young and in love too." she says. You try to smile, but instead you sight. Catelyn shrinks her eyebrows. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing."
"I can see in your face that something is wrong."
Your gaze goes back to the mirror. Your marriage to Robb is perfect, he's like one of the heroes from the songs, one the best men in the Westeros, trusting, loving, honest. Everything you can wish for in a husband. God, you love this man with all your heart and you know he loves you too. Nevertheless, your heart is getting heavy. During your pregnancy you have gain weight and have not lost the soft pads on your hips, even though you had a wet nurse, your breasts are not quite as tight as before, besides that you have stretch marks over your abdomen and breasts. You look backt at Catelyn suddenly tears come into your eyes. She overcomes the distance between you in a few steps and pulls you into her arms.
"What's going on?"
It's uncomfortable for you to share these thoughts with her. But why? It was Catelyn who told you all about moon bleeding, marriage, the marriage night and birth. Your mother came to your wedding, but you were so alienated by then that you asked Lady Stark for advice. She was always like a mother to you. You get out of her hug to look at her.
"I think..." you start and swallow hard bevor you speak again. "He doesn't want me anymore," you answer. "Not since Edds birth, even in the time before. He doesn't desire me anymore."
You don't want to think about these thoughts at all, and most importantly, you do not want to keep thinking. If Robb doesn't share the bed with you anymore, who does he do it with? Only the thought that he is lying with someone else causes nausea to rise in you. But he'd never do that, you know, he would never shame you like that, never hurt you that much. Even if you're so sure, there's a voice from the corner of your mind screaming: every man has needs and you obviously can't satisfy his anymore. Everyone would let him in her bed, he always has women around him who want to seduce him. Younger than you, more beautiful than you. Virgins, whores, everybody. He's the king.
"Nonsense!" you're surprised at the sharpness of Catelyn voice, but she keeps talking. "Have you seen how he looks at you, sweetheart? That's not the way men look at women they don´t desire. He's crazy for you. He loves you."
"I didn't say he doesn't love me. I know he does. He just doesn't want me anymore, that's something else."
"Why do you think that?"
"Well, we have." you interrupt yourself, but then you throw all the shame overboard, it doesn´t help. Catelyn held your hand during the birth of your son, shame is absolutely unnecessary in this place. "We haven't shared the bed with each other since Eddard's birth. He didn't make me feel like he wanted that."
You think of the time after your wedding, sometimes you didn't even get to your cambers, he was too eager to take you. Even during the war, it was hard for him to stay away from you for more than two days. Only the memory of the gazes that he has cast on you over the battle plans in the war council, makes your cheeks glow. But since the last third of your pregnancy, he's begun to retreat from you. Not emotionally, but physically. No more hot kisses in dark corridors, no more hands wandering over your body, no longer whispers of dirty thoughts as he passes by in the corridors.
Now Catelyn sigh too. "I can only give you one advice I've learned in 16 years of marriage," she says, and you look at her curiously. "Speak with him."
You grimace, that's exactly what you didn't want. You don't want him to think he's a bad husband or that you miss something. But if you're honest, you miss it, your miss your husbands touches.
Catelyn looks at you determinedly and smiles. "I'll take Edd tonight, I want to spend more time with my grandson anyway and you talk to your husband." her voice does not allow contradiction, and even if you would want to contradict, a horn rings loudly through the hallway and over the courtyards of the castle. Robb's finally home. When you think of seeing him again, your heart beats faster, you missed him so much. You take Eddard carefully out of his bed. Fortunately, he won't wake up. You're just taking him with you because you know that Robb had a hard time being separated from his son for so long and that he really wants to see him.
In the evening, you sit on your bed and open your braids , so that your hair falls open over your shoulders. You've already dismissed your maids for the evening. The crip is now empty and you already have the need to run through Winterfell to your son. You always thought you couldn't love anyone as much as Robb, but then you held your son in your arms for the first time and your heart almost broke from love. You don't love Robb less now, it's just more love. The room door opens and Robb enters the room. When you see him, a smile comes to your face.
"My Lady Wife." he says joyfully and closes the door behind him. He comes over to you, puts a kiss on your lips and sits on the bed next to you. Then he looks at the crip "Where is Eddard?" he asks.
"With your mother, she wanted to take care of him tonight. So we may have a little rest." you answer him. He looks back at you, his gaze becomes troubled.
"Was it too exhausting to have Edd alone? Shouldn't I have left? Do you need more maids?" he asks and takes your hand in his.
"No. No, with Eddard, everything was perfect, he's perfect. The perfect little prince." you calm him down quickly. "Your mother helped me a lot with government affairs." Robb breathes out relieved.
"Good." then he stands up again and starts getting undressed. As he pulls his shirt over his head, you observe the play of his back muscles and you feel a flattening inyour abdomen. You're watching Robb change his clothes, you can't turn your eyes away from him. Then he comes back to bed, he smiles at you from above and caress you cheek, you lean into his palm and close your eyes. Then he squates down in front of you to be on an eye level with you. Your legs lie to the left and right side of his body while your bare toes slightly brush over the soft carpet on the floor.
"I missed you." you say and kiss his palm.
"I also missed you. I wanted to turn around the first day and come back to you."
You laugh quietly and start playing wit the curls in his neck. He closes his eyes and groan quietly. The familiarity you two have grown over the years fills your heart with warmth. You grew up together, were best friends for years, and you never feared marrying him. You slightly pull at the curls in his neck to get him to put his head in the neck. He opens his eyes again and looks right into your eyes, you bow down and put your lips on his. You lean into the kiss, bury your hands in his hair, but before you can intensify the kiss further, Robb pulls away.
You can't help but sigh. You could just turn around now and crawl under the soft blankets and fur, but then your worries would still be the same tomorrow. Catelyn is right, the only solution is to talk to him. You're searching for the right words, but you don't really know what to say. Robb's eyes hang on your face, he's pulling his eyebrows together.
"What's going on?" he asks.
You still don't know what to say, you can't find the right words. So you just decide to speak out. "Why don't you desire me anymore?"
Robb looks shocked at you. "What do you mean?"
You take a deep breath. "Since I was pregnant, since we had Edd, you don´t desire me anymore."
"No, that's not true," he said, shaking his head. Is he just saying that to not hurt your feelings? You know it's true, you feel it, you noticed the change in his behavior.
"Is it because I'm not as thin as I was before? Or the scars on my stomach? Because I'm a mother now? I can understand that you withdrew from our marriage bed during pregnancy, but Eddard is now four moons old, the maester said weeks ago that I´m healed, Nevertheless, you don't even touch me anymore! I can be happy if you kiss me." the words just sprinkle out of your mouth.
Robb's just looking at you for a few moments. "What are you talking about?" he asks in a quiet voice. "You think I don´t want you? You think I would not longing after you every second oft the day?"
There's something flashing in his eyes and he's moving so fast that you can't even react. Suddenly you lie with your back on the bed, Robb over you. You can feel his body on yours, but you know that he holds most of his weight on his knee between your legs. On his face appears the trace of a smile.
"My queen," he whispers in your ear and then places a kiss right below your earlobes. You shiver slightly and bite your lips so you not let out desperate moan. Gods, you missed his touches. Your hands lie around his body, caress the muscles of his shoulders. "I let you down, made you feel like you weren't desirable. I'm sorry, wife, forgive me." his words are followed by a series of kisses, over your neck, your cheek and finally your lips. When his tongue slips into your mouth, you can't help but cry out. Your body bends toward him and you can feel the pleasant poaching between your legs.
He separates himself from you, rests on his elbows and looks into your eyes. You bend up to feel his lips on yours again, the familiar feeling of his lips allowing heat to flow through your whole body. But again Robb doesn´t let you intensify the kiss an pulls away.
"Wifey," he says in a dark voice with a hint of his northern accent. "I'm sorry, I didn't want you to feel like I woun´t desire you." his lips goes back to your neck, first he places light kisses and then he begins to suck. A whimper comes over your lips. Robb's hands wander over your body, you wish your thin nightgrown wasn't between you. He lets go of your neck again, and you know you're gonna have his mark tomorrow. But you doesn´t care. Your hands wander over his shoulders forward to his chest and you draw on the fabric of his shirt. You want to feel his skin under your hands, but Robb grabs your hands and pushes them with one hand on your wrists over your head into the mattress.
"I forgive you." you say, you can hardly forme a clear thought, it's all about Robb and your desire for him. "Please, Robb." you don't know exactly what you're asking him for, you just want the burning desire in your body to be fed. A deep groaning comes out of his throat, but he won't let go of your hands. You push your hips against his, you feel his body and his hard member on you. Robb and you both moan at the little friction. He caress with one hand over your body, circles around your chest and lets his thumb run over your nipples. You try to suppress a moan, you don't want to look as desperate as you are. Gods, you missed your husband's touches.
"Did you want to know the truth? Why I have withdrawn from you?" he says, bowing down slightly to kiss you, your tongues are playing with each other. Robb finally releases your wrists, you immediately bury your hands in his curls, while Robb puts his hand on your cheek. The gentle stroking of his hand doesn't quite match the hot intensity with which he claims your mouth as hi. You keep pressing on to him. You want to feel every inch of his body against yours. You know you're incredibly wet, almost embarrassed how little it took.
Robb's hands wander over your body, he gently pushes your nightgown up above your hips, finally his warm hand touches your thigh.
"I could hardly be near you without going completely mad." he starts kissing your neck again, going slowly over your collarbone. You slightly pull his hair to get him to kiss your lips again, but he only bites swiftly, then kiss the place again. His hand goes higher and higher under your nightgown until it finally reaches exactly where you want it to be. In the next moment, he pushes a finger into you and moves it slowly. You inhale sharply, bend your hips towards him.
"I had to keep thinking about the fact that you were carrying my child in you. Gods, you thought I don´t want you anymore because you were pregnant? On the contrary, I wanted you every second. I would rather have you locked up in this room. Every second I could only think of pushing you against the next wall and taking you right there."
His lips find yours again, you spread your legs further for him, make room for him and bow toward him. Your hands wander over his neck, his shoulders, to his muscular upper arms. You need something to hold on to. Robb squeezes his thumb into slight circles over your clitoris and your legs start to tremble.
"Fuck. I could no longer have a clear thought, could not concentrate, could hardly be a king, because my thoughts were constantly circling around you. I had to stay away so that I could function at all, so I would not fall over you." he adds another finger. A wet sound fills the room as you are still trying to understand his words. He starts kissing your collarbone again. His lips wander deeper and he starts kissing your breasts over your nightgrown. The movement of his fingers becomes faster, he curves them slightly and increases the pressure on your clit a little. Then he'll start sucking on your nipple.
"Robb," you cry out. The feeling of his lips, his fingers, of him is strange, but simultaneously so familiar. Your whole body is trembling. His teeth brush against the fabric of your nightgown as he intensifies the movement of his fingers and the stimulation of your clit. Your fingers scratch over his skin as you come around his finger with a moan.
Robb waits until you have calmed down again and then gently removes his fingers from you, in the light of the flames you can recognize the glitter of moisture on his fingertips. Robb takes them into his mouth and the sight alone almost makes you moan again. Your breathing is still a little fast, Robb gently kisses your cheeks and smiles at you.
"You taste as sweet as I remember, even better," he whispers in your ear before his lips find yours again.
You bit him slightly in the lower lip, causing him to shudder. You want him. You have to have him. You want to feel him. You push your hips forward, make them slide against the center of his body. You feel his hardness. Robb groans in your mouth, then place his hand at your hips and he pushes you back onto the soft mattress.
"Not so impatient, my queen." he says, and a slight smile appears on his face. He's driving you crazy. His lips wander over your neck, your breasts. Your nightgown is in his way. "Are you hanging on this night grown?" he asks you quietly with a rough voice.
"No." you say confused about his question, and at the next moment he tears your nightgown of your body.
"Robb, I liked it despite that." when the cold air hits your body, your nipples arise, and the next moment his lips surround your nipple, while his hand embraces your other breast, he rubs his thumb over your nippel. Your protest immediately disappears from your lips and is replaced by a moan. You throw your head back into the soft pillows. Your body burns from craving and you give yourself to it. "Robb, please. I want you." you beg him, you want to finally feel him inside you again.
"Let me take care of you first. " he says, his eyes sparkling in the light of the candle, his gaze is full of desire but he holds back. On face appears a smiling, more wolf than man. His lips find yours again, for a fast and hot kiss. Robb's hands wander across your body, his touches are tender, you get goosebumps all over your body. His hands seem to be everywhere on you, sliding down your arms, cupping your breasts, trickling along your waist. His lips followed them down. He kisses ever centimeter of your body. Quiet praises falling from his lips.
"My beautiful wife. My queen. You're perfect. Never think anything else."
And you believe him. With every word, every kiss, the self-doubt disappears. Your body stretches toward him and you feel like the blood in your veins is replaced by fire. Robb's lips slowly wander over your belly, his beard slightly tickles on your skin, his hands move along your sides, laying on your hips.
Feather-light kisses wander over the stretch marks on your belly. "You're so beautiful. I didn't deserve you." Robbs hands slip over your hips down to your thighs, and he slightly pushes them apart. You gladly give in and open your legs for him.Robb makes himself comfortable between your legs, kisses the inside of your thigh, you wimper as his beard strikes over the skin. Anticipation runs through your entire body and you feel yourself clenching around nothing.
"Robb, please."
"Gods, since when have you been so impatient Love?" you can hear the laughter in his voice.
"I have waited months for..." your sentence ends in a cry as his tongue slides through your folds up to your clit. He moans as he tastes you an the vibration sends sparkling through your whole body. Your hand is buried in his curls, your nails scratch slightly over his scalp. You're pressing your hips against his mouth, wimpering desperate. His tongue rotates over your clit. He alternates between sucking and licking. You groan. His beard lightly scratches the skin of your thighs. His tongue slides from your clit through your folds. Robb moans as his tongue presses into you. Your legs are starting to shake again. He rolls his tongue slightly. Hot pleasure runs through you. You twitch against his mouth. Your body shudders and the familiar knot forms in your abdomen. Robb eats you out like a starving man. He licks up every drop of your wetness. His tongue skilled switches back and forth. He feast on your cunt, licks over your folds and your clit. Then he sucks lightly, making you scream. For a moment you're worried that the guards in the hallway will hear you, but when Robb drives back inside you and rolls his tongue every thought flies out of your mind and all you can do is moan for him. Your fingernails scrape across his scalp. He groans and this sound is enough to make you clench again. Your hips rise towards him. Robb laughs darkly and pushes you back onto the bed with one hand. He is enjoying himself a little to much. His tongue doesn't stop for a second.
"Robb I." you start but can't finish your sentence. The pleasure he gives you makes your whole body tremble. You notice sweat forming on your forehead. You shift back and forth in his grip. Can't decide if it's too much or if you want more.
"I got you my beautiful wife." his voice sends vibrations through your core and you flinch away slightly. But Robbs immediately pulls you back onto his mouth. "Come for me." his tongue slaps against your clit. You moan and your orgasm washes over you. You squeeze your eyes shut as you writhe back and forth on the sheets. Your body pulsates pleasantly as your pleasure takes over you. Robb carefully kisses your middle, your thighs, tastes your wetness on his tongue. Robbs fingers caress your legs.
You're slowly coming back to reality. Your skin burns under his fingers. Your breathing is heavy and you have to blink a few times before your vision becomes clear again. You lean slightly on your elbows and look down at Robb. His eyes are on you, he is watching you. There is a satisfied grin on his lips.
"Your are a sight for sore eyes Wifey." his voice is now heavy with his northern accent. His eyes dark with lust and pure desire in his gaze. The hunger in his eyes makes you blush like a maiden and at the same time sends hot shivers through you.
With a smile on your lips your roll your eyes. Your heart is full of love for Robb. He places another kiss on your center. You twitch away from the overstimulation. You whimper softly. Robb sits up again. His hand wipes your wetness from his beard before letting his lips wander over your body again. He knows well that you can´t stand the cold feeling of his wet beard on your skin. He, on the other hand, loves it when the evidence of your desire for him runs down his chin.
Your lips meet for a kiss, you taste yourself on his tongue. You moan and lean into his touch. Your hands wander down his body impatiently,your hands paint over his hardness, his hips bend forward and he groans in your kiss. Suddenly your hands are pushed away and in the next moment Robb pushes his pants from his hips. His cock is hard and stretches toward you, the tip red and dripping with precum.
"I know I have a lot to make up for but I can't wait." you giggle softly at his words and open your legs for him again. His gaze lingers briefly on his wet middle and he takes a deep, shaky breath. “Fuck you look like a goddess."
"Stop with the compliments and finally take me." you say impatiently. New desire burns within you. You can hardly wait to finally feel him inside you again.
Robb positions itself at your entrance, your lips meet again for a passionate kiss. Your husband pushes himself inside you with one quick thrust. Your scream is swallowed by your kiss. Robb pauses, pressing his forehead to yours. His body is shaking. Sweat forms on his bare chest. You raise your hands and scratch lightly over your muscles. But you also need a moment too to get used to the feeling of fullness. Gods did you miss this. You push your hips towards him as a sign that he should move. Slowly he pulls back just to let himself sink back into you, making you feel every inch of its length. You throw your head back on the pillow and moan. Your legs spread further, allowing him to go a little deeper inside you. Pleasure runs through your entire body. You wrap your legs around his wais,push yourself towards him. Robb moans in your ear before he curses quietly. He's so deep inside of you, his body heavy and warm on yours, right now there's nothing for you but him. The sky could fall down and you wouldn´t notice.
"Fuck. I missed you so much." you moan. Enjoying his thrusts and the pleasant pulsation in your center.
"I missed you too. I´m so sorry Love. Don't ever doubt me again. I will never let you doubt again how much I desire you. I promise." he kisses your lips, you open your lips a little and his tongue slips back into your mouth.He doesn´t stop his thrusts for a second. Each of his movemens is precise and lets you see stars. Robb takes you slowly, enjoying every second.
The knot in your stomach is starting to build up again as he rolls his hips, grinding over your clit. Your hands wander over his muscular body as your hips meet each of his movements. Your legs start shaking again.
"Fuck Robb."
His hand is on your cheek, and he gently caress you. His lips never leave yours for a second, your tongues dance around each other. He bites your lip. You moan in response. You lean your head back a little, gasping for air. Robbs lips immediately attack your neck again, he sucks dark marks on your skin.
The knot in your body becomes more intense gets stronger with each of its shocks, you can feel how you pulse around his cock "Please don't stop."
"I could never my sweet love." he whispers, hot breath on the skin of your neck. "Don't worry. I'll take care of you."
Your bodies melt into each other. Robb takes your hand, intertwines your fingers with each other. All our thoughts are just Robb, his body on yours, his cock inside you, his sent around you, the feeling of his warm skin on yours. You clench again around him, make him shiver.
"It feels so good." you moan.
Robb smiles, catches your lips in a kiss. "I know Love. If you ever doubt again that you are not the most beautiful woman on earth to me, say a word and I will fuck that nonsense out of your pretty head." You whimper at his words. His thrusts become harder as he gets closer to his own orgasm. Rapid breathing mixes with your moans. "Have you understand me?"
You nod and Robb stops in the middle of his movement. His cock slips almost out of you. You want to scream in frustration.
"Words. You know that."
"Yes, I understand." you say breathlessly.
He rams himself back with one thrust. "How about I keep you full of me. I'll give you another child. So everyone can see how much I love you. This time, I'm doing it right. I will not depart from you, I will tell you every day how beautiful you are."
Your pleasures pass through you like a storm. Heat runs through your veins as your legs start to tremble again. You interlock your ankles behind his lower back and press him closer into you.
"Please." you whisper and you barely recognize your own voice. You pull his head on his hair from your neck back to your lips and kiss him passionately. Robb's moans in your mouth. A dark, animalistic tone that causes a shiver all over your body.
"God, you're gonna look so good, full with my child." Robbs voice trembles. He is lost in his lust and in you.
"Yes, please give me another child Robb." you want a second child, and a third and a fourth. "A whole bunch of wolfpuppies."
Robb laughs quietly, you stretch to kiss his cheek. His beard picks slightly on your cheek as your lips wander over his cheekbone to his neck to spread kisses there. His laughter becomes a moan, his grip on your hands become stronger, as his strokes become faster. Again, you can't suppress a moan, your free hand goes over his arm and you sink your nails into his shoulder, you need something to hold on to. Hot waves of desire pass through your body and you feel your next orgasm approach. You are not sure if you can come again. It´s to much and at the same time not enough.
"I'll share every thought with you, I'll whisper to you in the council meeting that I'd rather would like to bend you right over the table. And when they're all gone, that's exactly what I'm going to do. I don't care if anyone can hear us. Let them. Let everyone hear how much I love you. How much I long for you. You'll get sick of me."
You shiver at his words, your whole body cramps and in the next moment your orgasm breaks over you. You can feel your nails crawling into the skin of his shoulder, and Robb moans when you clench around him. Uncontrollable and overwhelming, your pleasure drowns you and makes your vison blurr. Robb's name falls from your lips like a prayer. Robb is slowing down his strokes again as he leads you through your orgasm. As the first waves weaken, you feel Robb's thrust get faster again, you throw your head back as you cry out loudly.
"You're doing so well. Milking me so good. Gods I would die for just one second longer in your sweet cunt Love." he praises you, thrusting harder into you. Only now do you realize how much he has holding himself back all this time. You whimper and tremble under him. You can't do anything else but take it. Enjoying the feeling of him losing himself inside you while chasing his own orgasm.
Robb's hand goes between your bodys and starts rubbing fast circles over your clit. In the same second he bites your collarbone, as he sinks even deep inside you. With a groan he comes inside you. The combination of his twitching cock inside you, the skillfull circles around your clit and the slight pain at your collarbone pull you over the cliff again and you scream out your lust. Tears flow out of your eyes and your whole body trembles around him.
He moves carefully for a few more moments before stopping. You're both gasping for air. You have to blink before your vision clears again. Your gaze finds his. His eyes are full of love for you. For a moment you're just looking at each other. An exhausted smile spreads on your faces. You whipe a sweaty strand of hair off his forehead and kiss his lips. Then you put your arms around his neck and pull him down to you. Robb lets his weight fall on you, you can feel every inch of his body on your heated skin, but it's not uncomfortable, it makes you feel safe. You feel warm, loved and happy. Everything is as it should be. Not a single thought of self-doubt is in your head. Robb spreads light kisses on your the skind of your neck. You're scratching his neck wraping his damp curls around your fingers. He sight and close his eyes and buries his nose in the crook of your neck. You stay for a few minutes just lying like this, enjoying each other.
Robb kisses your forehead, then gently rolls down from you. As he slips out of you, you immediately miss the feeling of him inside you.
"Are you all right?" he whispers.
"Yes." you answer in the same volume. "You?"
"Of course." smiling, he turns to his side, pulls you in his arms and kisses your cheek. "I mean what I said. There's no one else for me. I love you. With every fiber of my body, I love and desire you. Always. Please don't forget that. I'm sorry you doubted me. That's never gonna happen again. I swear. I love you so much."
You slide closer to him and paint small circles over his chest. "I love you." you kiss his naked chest and caress over his arm. Then you shigh satisfied and cuddel closer to your husband.
"Don't make yourself too comfortable, I'm not done with you jet." he whispers in your ear with a rough, deep voice, and you have to bite your lips to suppress a whimper. Gods, how could you ever doubt him?
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libraryoffandomsuniverse · 5 months ago
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Trust
Series masterlist
YNN: your nickname
My first time writing something steamy (ish). Hopefully it's not too clunky.
Sometimes romance is a date to a restaurant. Sometimes it's plotting murder together. 😉
~~~
"I want him dead."
Although she spoke quietly, Rhaenyra's voice seemed to echo around the room.
You twisted your head to look at her in disbelief. You had just finished making love after hours. You'd coaxed her to pleasure several times using your hands, mouth and cock. How could your darling wife be thinking about murder when you were still barely capable of stringing words together?
"I need you to repeat that," you said slowly, "because it almost sounds like I haven't made you come enough if you're thinking about murder. It's not mine, is it?"
She giggled and moved closer, resting her head on your shoulder. Your arms instantly wrapped around her, an echo of the countless times you'd held each other like this before.
"Of course it's not you," she rubbed your chest in reassurance. "I'm talking about Otto Hightower."
At the mention of the Hand, your good mood plummeted.
Ever since Lord Strong's resignation, you had been cursed with Ser Otto's presence. The fact that he became the Hand again was beyond a joke, given that his ambitions to make his grandson Aegon King was a secret only to Viserys.
The sight of Queen Alicent strutting around the Red Keep with her supporters flaunting their green robes made you seethe. Coupled with the divide between both camps of supporters and it made for an increasingly poisonous atmosphere in court.
You and Rhaenyra had not been idle. The return of your father as Master of Ships, along with your promotion to Master of Laws had caused quite a bit of grief to Ser Otto's plans. The sight of the vein throbbing on his forehead whenever you managed to persuade the King to agree with you was a beautiful one, and it took everything you had not to smirk or snigger like a child or Daemon.
The thought of your goodbrother reminded you of his and Laena's recent return from Pentos. If anyone knew of a way to remove the Hand, it would be them.
"He will die," you whispered. "I'll make certain of it. Laena will know of something that may help."
"Not Daemon?" Rhaenyra tilted her head to face yours.
You snorted. "Daemon's solution would probably involve a dagger and a catspaw. We need to be subtle and leave nothing for the Queen to accuse us of murder. Laena will know; she was always interested in plants."
"If she finds a way, who will replace Otto? Your mother? Daemon? Tyland Lannister?"
"Actually," you began. "I thought it could be you." She lifted her head and looked at you with shock. "Let me finish," you continued. "You became cupbearer at eight, you've had a seat on the Small Council for almost ten years. You've seen how it works, you know about the issues the other Masters face. When Lord Lyonel was Hand, you regularly met with him to discuss solutions."
Your voice had risen as you'd argued your point, but your hands remained gentle as they cupped her face.
"Think of it as extra training for when you become Queen," you said.
Rhaenyra's face was uncertain. "You are so sure of yourself. How do you know it will happen?"
"I'll make it happen, my love," you promised before reaching up to kiss her.
"I do not feel ready, YNN," she confessed. "Every time I sit at that table, I feel like a pretender, like a girl again."
"Rhae," her name rolled on your tongue. "I don't think anyone is ever really ready to wear the crown. But there have been good kings, bad kings and kings that were middling. There have also been excellent and terrible Hands. You becoming Hand will not cause the Seven Kingdoms to collapse. I would always be happy to advise you if you wished, but you're more knowledgeable than you think you are. If you can't believe in yourself, believe in me and the fact that I trust in you."
The kiss she gave you was hungry, full of teeth and passion. You pulled her up so that she lay on top of you. Her hands made their way to your hair, while yours slowly crept down her back.
When she finally pulled away, her lips were red and bruised. Her cheeks were flushed while her white hair fell loosely around you both, creating a veil that hid you both from the outside world.
"When my wife makes a request, what loyal husband wouldn't strive to see it done?" your lips brushed against hers. "I'll fly to Driftmark tomorrow to ask Laena."
"I want Otto Hightower dead," she ordered.
Like a Queen.
Your wife's reply was not in words.
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stilljuststardust · 4 months ago
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Heyyy! It’s parrot again! And today I have two related questiones!
Both have to do with the information that all one needs to do to manifest is desire and live in the imagination/daydream.
1: if kids often truly believe the things they are playing or imagining to be real how come they don’t accidentally manifest them?
2: i daydream pretty much constantly and have been affirming out the wazoo and i am going to continue persisting and believing and all that jazz, but i have yet to see the results in the 3D(i am confident they will come; im just getting a lil impatient lol)
Thanksssss! Have a nice day :3
Hi parrot!
1:
Children can manifest, sometimes they do (I did). However, they don't usually manifest their play pretend because on some level they do know its just that, pretend. I remember having tons of crazy beliefs as a kid but my mindset was almost always "if I wish really hard maybe it will be true" instead of actually assuming so. So, unfortunately, I didn't get a pokemon on my birthday.
Children aren't stupid and I do believe that they know they're playing pretend.
However, there were times I did apply the law as a child.
This story is humiliating but whatever, I was a child.
When I was a kid I was really into lip sync battles (now an source of intense shame lmao) and every damn day I practiced because I was CONVINCED it was going to happen at some point for me.
When we were leaving town to meet my grandparents in a more populated area I was like, welp this is it, clearly I'm going to do it now. My mother was like, why do you keep talking about that I promise you there aren't any where we're going.
I didn't listen because I knew she was wrong. We arrive and immediately go out for dinner to a random restaurant, we walk in and in big neon letters a sign says "lip sync battle next door".
My mom literally thought I was crazy the entire week leading up because she had no idea why I was so adamant that when we got there I would be in one.
Why did this manifest and my pokemon didn't? Because when I was practicing for it I did it as if it was real. I knew it was going to happen and I didn't even stop to think about when or how all I knew was I should have a song ready.
I didn't budge because I knew I had it. I knew it was going to happen no matter what.
I wasn't day dreaming, I was practicing. I wasn't hoping, I was commanding.
2:
I know many people refer to the 4D as "imagination" but this doesn't mean play pretend or day dreaming, what they mean is your internal world.
Yes as a child I was imagining it happened but I did so from the assumption that what I was imagining HAD to happen. I didn't consider it play pretend I considered it practice.
People literally thought I was dumb but I didn't stop to consider there opinion because I knew it was mine.
When you imagine the image of what you want don't think "I hope I'll get this" think "I already have this"
I think we often unconsciously undermine ourselves because we're still thinking as if it isn't here.
Asking where it is or telling yourself it's not here yet are still affirming against it.
Affirmations are just thoughts you repeat, if you're ALSO repetitively thinking against what you want then you are ALSO affirming against it.
Think as if you have already manifested it, as if having it is cold hard fact. Yes it may feel unnatural at first but that doesn't matter.
In my story from before, I didn't ever stop to wonder why I hadn't been in one yet because I knew that it was happening no matter what so timing was irrelevant to me.
Think about who you'd be if you had it, how you'd see the world, what you would think, then think as that version of you.
Personally I like to ground before I do anything because it helps me to think of it as real.
Take a look at these, i think they'll help you:
Mental diets aren't just getting rid of negative thoughts
This one's really good
Loa checklist
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countrymusiclover · 5 months ago
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9 - Secretly Vaella Lannister
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Part 10
The Lion Knight and Dragon Princess
Tags- just send an ask to be added @cdragons @kmc1989 @starkleila @noirrose21-blog @lover-of-books-and-tea
Lyanna Stark, a person I had never met until the day she wed my brother in secret. 
Jaime and Rhaegar were speaking with sept that my brother had gotten his marriage to his other wife anelled from.  Leaving me and Lyanna together to get changed into our gowns and not be in our sea travel clothes. “I suppose we shall be sisters after this you and I.” Lyanna first spoke to me tying her riding boots instead of wearing heels. 
“Yes, I suppose you’re right.  I must warn you though my brother does snore in his sleep.” 
She chuckled with a smile. “That I can handle.  He already knows I don’t shy away from a challenge.” 
“Apparently neither do I.  For Jaime could have kept his vow entirely and told me I was just dreaming like a foolish princess and that I should be focusing my sights on finding a man fit for my title.” I shake my head playfully smiling back at her.  
She came around the corner twirling in her light blue and white wedding gown with some of her hair styled into a flower crown. “What do you think, Vaella?” 
“You look beautiful.  My brother shall surely think so too.” I hung my mouth open seeing somewhat of the appeal he had towards the Northern Stark daughter. 
Lyanna grinned at me. “Ser Jaime and you shall have beautiful children if that’s ever something you talk about.” 
“Maybe someday we shall have children. But for now let’s both go get married.” Offering her my hand we walked outside together through the grassy area of trees in Dorne.  I was wearing a simple red dress and my black horse riding boots.  Leaving my silver hair not styled and allowing it to just flow naturally. 
"You may now cloak the bride and bring her under your protection." The sept wrapped a white ribbon around their intertwined hands. "In the sight of the seven. I hereby seal these two souls. Binding them as one for eternity. Look upon each other and say the words."
"Father, Smith, Warrior, Mother, Maiden, Crown, Stranger. I am hers ( his )  and she ( he ) is mine from this day until the end of my days." My brother and his secret lover said back to the other before they faced one another and sealed their love with a tender kiss. 
Rhaegar came over to me looping his arm through mine walking me back to the end of the small tree line that we had claimed as ye aisle. “Father may not be here to walk you down the aisle.  So I’ll gladly fill in his place.” 
“Thank you, brother.  I hope you approve of him.  I’d hate to see you two have to duel.” I squeezed his hand in my own, sending him a genuine smile. 
Rhaegar smiled with a shake of his head. “Gods you know how I hate fighting.” 
“I’m fully aware. You’d rather be born a minstrel and move your way through the streets singing to the King's people rather than be the King yourself.” 
He nudges me in the arm with us getting closer to the Septon and Jaime. “And you’d rather be a - I’m not entirely sure what you want.  But you’re surely not one to enjoy being in the spotlight as a princess.” 
“So um - what do you think of him?” I asked him a second time, wishing to know his feelings before we became husband and wife. 
Rhaegar clicked his tongue eyeing the boy with bright blonde hair. “From what I can he makes you happy. Like Lyanna makes me and so that’s all that really matters….Take good care of my little sister Jaime.” He slipped my hand in Jaime’s left. 
“I will, my prince.” Jaime went to bow but Rhaegar still held out his hand. 
“Just Rhaegar. You’re my brother in law now.” 
“I will take care of her, Rhaegar.” Jaime put his right hand shaking it firmly before my brother stepped out of the way when the Sept walked forward to stand in front of us. 
"You may now cloak the bride and bring her under your protection." The sept spoke softly, wrapped the same ribbon around mine and Jaime’s hand.  "In the sight of the seven. I hereby seal these two souls. Binding them as one for eternity. Look upon each other and say the words."
Glancing over my shoulder at my brother who had his arm secured around his new wife’s waist sent me a grin along with a head nod before I heard Jaime ask. “Are you ready, Vaella?” 
“Yes.” I uttered out pouring my eyes into his green orbs looking down on me. 
"Father, Smith, Warrior, Mother, Maiden, Crown, Stranger. I am hers ( his )  and she ( he ) is mine from this day until the end of my days." Jaime and I never took our eyes off of the other. 
The sept took a few steps back once untying the ribbon from our hands allowing me to fling my arms around Jaime’s neck crashing my lips up onto mine deeply.  “I’m officially yours and now always, my golden knight.” I muttered in between deep kisses until he broke it. 
“Lady Vaella Lannister does sound rather good to me. But you’ll always be a princess to me.” Jaime grinned holding me in his and against his chest as much as he physically could without hurting me too badly. 
Rolling my eyes I wonder when the day would come that he would stop using that nickname. “Please enough of that.  That’s my one request as your wife.” 
“Well I’m sorry but I cannot fill that request.  Because I love the look on your face when I do it.” He smirked proudly down at me, looking over to Rhaegar and Lyanna smiling back at us.  For that one and only day we were all happy and together.  Not aware that would be the last time we saw them and it was the last time they’d see us. 
I heard the lock of my chamber door rustling around with someone trying to open it causing me to wake in the middle of the night.  Slowly reaching underneath my bedside I drew a sword out from under it climbing out of my bed. Moving towards the door I raised the sword over my shoulder with both hands clutching the handle of the sword seeing the chamber door creak open very slowly. "Show yourself you twat. I'm ready and armed!" I raised my voice outward holding back tears knowing it was better to show no fear.
Yet my entire conscious state was completely rattled when I heard someone call my name that was impossible for me to not recognize in a heartbeat. "Vae...Vaella ....Jaime...please don't....it's me...it's Jaime." 
"J...Jaime. Is it...is it really you?" I croaked through heavy tears struggling to keep my grip on the blade handle on the off chance it wasn't and the gods were just playing tricks on my mind. Yet sure enough the door creaked open all the way revealing a sight that nearly broke me in two and shattered my heart. 
My gaze focused on his figure when he slowly stepped out of the darkness of the door and into the light being provided by burning candles. He didn't meet my gaze while I scanned over my husband's face.  “Yes, my princess.” 
I wanted to slap him across the face for using the nickname but all I cared about was that Jaime, my Jaime, was finally home to me. 
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officialstrawhat · 1 year ago
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Hello! This is my first One Piece Fanfiction, But I hope you like it! I'm currently about to start the Zou Arc so if I get something wrong sorry :P
Gif is not mine.
Trafalgar D. Law x Fem!Reader
Chapter List
Summary:
After King Riku is dethroned, Doflamingo takes you under his wing and asks you to follow only one strict rule, "do not leave the palace alone". However, your sense of adventure is too great.
Law had only one thing in mind... Revenge. And you seemed like the best way to do that.
Warnings: Dark themes, manipulation, death, murder, creepy doffy
Word Count: 1.2K
The Rose of Dressrosa
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Chapter 1
The sun shone brightly on the kingdom of Dressrosa. In the Market Square, flamenco dancers and musicians entertained the crowd as children weaved and played between shoppers and vendors. There on the furthest corner suite was flower shop. It hadn't been there long and at first glance one could mistake it as one of the many flower boutiques on the island. But the word around town was that it sold the best bouquets on the island. 
“Would you happen to have any red carnations?” An old woman asked the owner of the shop. 
The florist smiled kindly, “Of course one moment ma'am”. She moved to the doorway pushing away a satin curtain that covered the entryway to see a young girl no older than ten sitting on the counter reading a book. Tales of Grand Adventures the title read. Next to her rests a long trough planter full of rich soil. 
“Y/N” the woman called, causing the girl to look up from the pages of her book.
“Yes Mama?” you say politely.
“A nice lady wants some of those pretty red flowers you like. Can you make me a bouquet sweet girl?”
“Yes mama” you nod excitedly, knowing exactly what to do. You raise your arms up, placing them in front of your chest palms facing outward. “Grow,” You say, eyes closed.
In the pot something began to grow. In a matter of no time red carnations in full bloom sprouted in the container.
“Good work my love,” Your Mother says proudly as she begins to snip the stems out of the soil and prepares it for the customer.
When your mother is done she makes her way back to the front and you naturally follow. 
“Thank you, we’re all so lucky to have you,” the old lady says, “You do such good work, your flowers are always the freshest in town.”
“You're welcome,” your mother says, taking the berry being held out for her.
“Come again,” You say as the customer leaves the shop.
You watch your mother place the money into the box underneath the store counter. 
“We’re just a few months away from getting our own home.” she smiled and grabbed your hands, “All thanks to you my sweet girl.”
You smile at the amazing woman in front of you. Things got hard after your father left, not that you remember, but your mother went hungry most nights to make sure you were fed. And there were some nights when you both did… 
So hungry in fact that when you found a strange-looking fruit you couldn't help but eat it. It was the miracle you both needed. It had granted you the power to grow any type of plant you wanted. As long as there was soil you could grow anything. Your mother dragged herself out of the mud and started to sell the pretty flowers that would sprout around you. Once she had enough berry she managed to buy passage to the prosperous island of Dressrosa. Here she rented a corner store with a tiny one-bedroom apartment upstairs.
“A home with a garden?” You ask excitedly. 
Smiling, your mother embraced you, “A home with whatever you want.”
In her arms you hugged her back tightly. It was a hug you would later wish had lasted much longer.
---
Night fell and you slept soundly in your mother's arms until screams in the streets could be heard outside. 
“Mama,” you shook the woman awake.
“What's wrong?” she said groggily, but her question was answered when a sudden crashing sound could be heard. “Wait here my darling.” 
Quickly she put her slippers and robe on and rushed to the staircase
“But-” you tried to follow.
“Please darling, it’ll be okay, mama just has to see what's wrong.”And with that, she left you…
The screams however did not stop, in fact, they seemed to be growing louder. After what seemed like forever you had had enough. You found your slippers and robe and ventured downstairs to go outside. From the shop windows what you saw was much worse than anything you could have possibly imagined. 
Fire, there was an actual fire that danced on rooftops, people who you recognize were laying in the street unmoving in puddles that were the color of your favorite flowers. Men in uniform wielding dangerous weapons caused chaos and struck down anyone in their path mercilessly. 
“NO! PLEASE! I have a child!” you heard, causing your head to spin to the left.
The Royal Guard's face looked torn but that didn't stop his blade from swinging down on the poor defenseless woman. 
It happened in slow motion for you. Her scream seemed so far away. The way she fell… it wasnt real it couldn't be real. 
"MAMA!" You shriek, tears fill your eyes, and blur your surroundings.   
“Get out of the way girl or you’ll be next,” she heard the slayer warn frantically. 
At his words anger to the likes of which you never felt before filled your body, your vision turned red. The guard swung his sword but the blade never made it to you, in fact, everyone within a thousand feet dropped to the ground unconscious. Allowing you to run to your mother's body to sob into her bloodied robe. 
Up on the rooftop of the flower shop Donquixote Doflamingo watched you, this little speck of a thing, had managed to knock out at least thirty of his puppets. This girl's Haki was strong. Just his luck to come across someone in this stupid kingdom who with some training actually had the potential to be of use. 
He smiled and jumped off the roof in front of you and the corpse of your mother. 
As if it was a reflex you place your palms away from your chest and create a shield of thick spiked plants to barricade yourself and your mother from the unknown threat. The Young Master’s smile widened, you were a devil fruit user as well. And not just any fruit, this was the Grow-Grow Fruit. Now this was definitely a rarity. And in theory, if brought to its full potential…
The thought made him smirk.
“I saw what happened, child. No need to fear me,” he said in a soothing voice. 
Upon hearing this you debated on dropping the barricade but before you could decide the voice spoke again, “Please let me help you and your mother.” 
At this you let a few branches of cacti deteriorate making slits in your barrier allowing you to see the man who spoke. He looked strange, you had never seen anyone like him before. He was large, with spiky blond hair, and donned a pink feather coat.
“You poor girl, allow me to take you and your mother to a safe place.” he could see the distrust in your eyes, then added, “Before more of the king's guard shows up.”
This made your heart clench. He was right, chaos still reigned around them. Your eyes flitted over to the storefront to see the stucco from your former home catching fire. Looking back at the strange man your mind was made up. The prickly plants browned and decayed around you until they were flat on the ground. 
Doflamingo was proud of himself for being able to conceal his smirk, as he bent down to carry the pathetic dead woman in his arms. “Follow me girl, I’ll take you to a safe place where we can lay your mother to rest. 
You wiped away a few tears and did as you were told. Walking away from everything you once knew.
Next Chapter
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97-liners · 2 years ago
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ok wait before i change my url back to 97-liners, a scoups childhood friends to lovers to exes to strangers to comical misunderstandings to lovers again au….
in which you burn out of your corporate job and end your long-term relationship and move back to your hometown. you’re miserable and directionless and staying with your parents while you look for a new job, and your mother finally has it with you and makes you babysit your baby niece while your sister goes back to work, just so you have something to do other than mope around all day.
one day while pushing your niece in a stroller through the park, wallowing in self-pity, you hear someone calling, “miss! you dropped this!” and you turn around, only to be met with two eyefuls of a sweaty choi seungcheol in the middle of a run, holding up one of your niece’s shoes. this is all fine and great, because you have a handsome beefy man jogging up to you, except: you broke up with seungcheol four years ago. you were at one point childhood sweethearts turned lovers, but he didn’t want to leave your hometown while you were dead set on moving to the city to pursue your career.
so now as you stare at seungcheol and he stares at you, and then at your niece, then back at you, something inside you, that resentful part that wishes seungcheol had followed you to seoul, decides to lie and blurts out, “yeah, she’s mine. i got divorced and moved back in with my mom.”
and seungcheol’s eyes widen a bit and unfortunately, it’s clear that he believes you. (it doesn’t help that your sister’s genetics are insane and you look just like your sister, so of course your niece looks like a mini you.)
“oh, um,” seungcheol stands there, searching for words. you feel some sort of weird satisfaction from seeing him squirm. “i hope you’re settling in okay. uh, you still have my number, right? feel free to give me a call if you need anything at all.”
you smile awkwardly and nod. what is this feeling? indigestion? guilt?
“i have two nephews and my sister in law is a kindergarten teacher,” he continues, “so if you need any help looking for a good daycare or support programs, just let me know, alright?”
you nod again. you’re really starting to feel bad now.
“i’m glad to see you around, yn,” seungcheol smiles at you. it’s the same bright gummy smile that you remember, and your heart sinks. “i wish it was under better circumstances, but nonetheless, i’m glad to see you.”
“me too, seungcheol,” you tell him. there’s a pit in your stomach as the realization grows. what did you just do?
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kelpiemomma · 5 months ago
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So at the end of last year, and I mean the very end after Christmas, I had this. Terrible anxiety. Just wretched. I woke up anxious and I went to sleep anxious. My mind kept telling me "someone you love will die this year". And I kept telling myself, it's just anxiety. It's not real, you're working yourself up, you do this every year.
On the 27th of December my grandma's sister in law died. Only a couple days past the new year her brother, my great uncle, died. Two people I was friends with at work died the first week of January. And then on the fifth of May my mother's second mother passed away.
I hadn't seen my grandma in years. I'd spoken to her over the phone, but adult life- it takes away from you. It takes your time. It takes your concentration. My mom went in and got to see her when they thought she was brain dead, but she woke up and for a minute we had hope. We knew there was a good chance she'd go downhill quick but we hoped. But in the end she went to hospice and passed. And I'll never speak to her again. She'll never send us cookies for Christmas again. I'll never hear my mom call her over the phone and sound so bright and happy.
She was family, so we helped set up her service. My brother and I were comic relief, cracking jokes and poking fun at each other. It was a somber day and we tried to not let it get the best of us all. I kept a smile on my face because it was what was needed.
But now I'm home and I hate this part about getting older. I hate knowing that people pass. I hate looking at my grandparents and parents and brother and knowing one day I will be attending their services, or they'll be attending mine. It doesn't quite terrify me but it does something similar.
I'm just. I'm sad. I'm scared. But I have to put on a brave face so I will. I just miss her. I wish I could talk to her and hug her one more time.
So just. Please.
If you haven't spoken to a loved one recently, call them. If they're close, go and give them a hug. For me. Because they deserve it, and so do you.
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ndbookstudy · 1 year ago
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i am that, nisargardatta maharaj, ch. 61.
Questioner: I was lucky to have holy company all my life. Is it enough for self-realisation?
Maharaj: It depends what you make of it.
Q: I was told that the liberating action of satsang is automatic. Just like a river carries one to the estuary, so the subtle and silent influence of good people will take me to reality.
M: It will take you to the river, but the crossing is your own. Freedom cannot be gained nor kept without will-to-freedom. You must strive for liberation; the least you can do is uncover and remove the obstacles diligently. If you want peace you must strive for it. You will not get peace just by keeping quiet.
Q: A child just grows. He does not make plans for growth, nor has he a pattern; nor does he grow by fragments, a hand here a leg there; he grows integrally and unconsciously.
M: Because he is free of imagination. You can also grow like this, but you must not indulge in forecasts and plans, born of memory and anticipation. It is one of the peculiarities of a jnani that he is not concerned with the future. Your concern with future is due to fear of pain and desire for pleasure, to the jnani all is bliss: he is happy with whatever comes.
Q: Surely, there are many things that would make even a jnani miserable
M: A jnani may meet with difficulties, but they do not make him suffer. Bringing up a child from birth to maturity may seem a hard task, but to a mother the memories of hardships are a joy. There is nothing wrong with the world. What is wrong is in the way you look at it. It is your own imagination that misleads you. Without imagination there is no world. Your conviction that you are conscious of a world is the world. The world you perceive is made of consciousness; what you call matter is consciousness Itself. You are the space (akash) in which it moves, the time in which it lasts, the love that gives it life. Cut off imagination and attachment and what remains?
Q: The world remains. I remain.
M: Yes. But how different it is when you can see it as it is, not through the screen of desire and fear.
Q: What for are all these distinctions -- reality and illusion, wisdom and ignorance, saint and sinner? Everyone is in search of happiness, everyone strives desperately; everyone is a Yogi and his life a school of wisdom. Each learns his own way the lessons he needs. Society approves of some, disapproves of others; there are no rules that apply everywhere and for all time.
M: In my world love is the only law. I do not ask for love, I give it. Such is my nature.
Q: I see you living your life according to a pattern. You run a meditation class in the morning, lecture and have discussions regularly; twice daily there is worship (puja) and religious singing (bhajan) in the evening. You seem to adhere to the routine scrupulously.
M: The worship and the singing are as I found them and I saw no reason to interfere. The general routine is according to the wishes of the people with whom I happen to live or who come to listen. They are working people, with many obligations and the timings are for their convenience. Some repetitive routine is inevitable. Even animals and plants have their time-tables.
Q: Yes, we see a regular sequence in all life. Who maintains the order? Is there an inner ruler, who lays down laws and enforces order?
M: Everything moves according to its nature. Where is the need of a policeman? Every action creates a reaction, which balances and neutralises the action. Everything happens, but there is a continuous cancelling out, and in the end it is as if nothing happened.
Q: Do not console me with final harmonies. The accounts tally, but the loss is mine.
M: Wait and see. You may end up with a profit good enough to justify the outlays.
Q: There is a long life behind me and I often wonder whether its many events took place by accident, or there was a plan. Was there a pattern laid down before I was born by which I had to live my life? If yes, who made the plans and who enforced them? Could there be deviations and mistakes? Some say destiny is immutable and every second of life is predetermined; others say that pure accident decides everything.
M: You can have it as you like. You can distinguish in your life a pattern or see merely a chain of accidents. Explanations are meant to please the mind. They need not be true. Reality is indefinable and indescribable.
Q: Sir, you are escaping my question! I want to know how you look at it. Wherever we look we find structure of unbelievable intelligence and beauty. How can I believe that the universe is formless and chaotic? Your world, the world in which you live, may be formless, but it need not be chaotic.
M: The objective universe has structure, is orderly and beautiful. Nobody can deny it. But structure and pattern, imply constraint and compulsion. My world is absolutely free; everything in it is self- determined. Therefore I keep on saying that all happens by itself. There is order in my world too, but it is not Imposed from outside. It comes spontaneously and immediately, because of its timelessness. Perfection is not in the future. It is now.
Q: Does your world affect mine?
M: At one point only -- at the point of the now. It gives it momentary being, a fleeting sense of reality. In full awareness the contact is established. It needs effortless, un-self-conscious attention.
Q: Is not attention an attitude of mind?
M: Yes, when the mind is eager for reality, it gives attention. There is nothing wrong with your world, it is your thinking yourself to be separate from it that creates disorder. Selfishness is the source of all evil.
Q: I am coming back to my question. Before I was born, did my inner self decide the details of my life, or was it entirely accidental and at the mercy of heredity and circumstances?
M: Those who claim to have selected their father and mother and decided how they are going to live their next life may know for themselves. I know for myself. I was never born.
Q: I see you sitting in front of me and replying my questions.
M: You see the body only which, of course, was born and will die.
Q: It is the life-story of thus body-mind that I am interested in. Was it laid down by you or somebody else, or did it happen accidentally?
M: There is a catch in your very question. I make no distinction between the body and the universe. Each is the cause of the other; each is the other, in truth. But I am out of it all. When I am telling you that I was never born, why go on asking me what were my preparations for the next birth? The moment you allow your imagination to spin, it at once spins out a universe. It is not at all as you imagine and I am not bound by your imaginings.
Q: It requires intelligence and energy to build and maintain a living body. Where do they come from?
M: There is only imagination. The intelligence and power are all used up in your imagination. It has absorbed you so completely that you just cannot grasp how far from reality you have wandered. No doubt imagination is richly creative. Universe within universe are built on it. Yet they are all in space and time, past and future, which just do not exist.
Q: I have read recently a report about a little girl who was very cruelly handled in her early childhood. She was badly mutilated and disfigured and grew up in an orphanage, completely estranged from its surroundings. This little girl was quiet and obedient, but completely indifferent. One of the nuns who were looking after the children, was convinced that the girl was not mentally retarded, but merely withdrawn, irresponsive. A psychoanalyst was asked to take up the case and for full two years he would see the child once a week and try to break the wall of isolation. She was docile and well-behaved, but would give no attention to her doctor. He brought her a toy house, with rooms and movable furniture and dolls representing father, mother and their children. It brought out a response, the girl got interested. One day the old hurts revived and came to the surface. Gradually she recovered, a number of operations brought back her face and body to normal and she grew into an efficient and attractive young woman. It took the doctor more than five years, but the work was done. He was a real Guru! He did not put down conditions nor talk about readiness and eligibility. Without faith, without hope, out of love only he tried and tried again.
M: Yes, that is the nature of a Guru. He will never give up. But, to succeed, he must not be met with too much resistance. Doubt and disobedience necessarily delay. Given confidence and pliability, he can bring about a radical change in the disciple speedily. Deep insight in the Guru and earnestness in the disciple, both are needed. Whatever was her condition, the girl in your story suffered for lack of earnestness in people. The most difficult are the intellectuals. They talk a lot, but are not serious. What you call realisation is a natural thing. When you are ready, your Guru will be waiting. Sadhana is effortless. When the relationship with your teacher is right you grow. Above all, trust him. He cannot mislead you.
Q: Even when he asks me to do something patently wrong?
M: Do it. A Sanyasi had been asked by his Guru to marry. He obeyed and suffered bitterly. But his four children were all saints and seers, the greatest in Maharashtra. Be happy with whatever comes from your Guru and you will grow to perfection without striving.
Q: Sir, have you any wants or wishes. Can I do anything for you?
M: What can you give me that I do not have? Material things are needed for contentment. But I am contented with myself. What else do I need?
Q: Surely, when you are hungry you need food and when sick you need medicine.
M: Hunger brings the food and illness brings the medicine. It is all nature's work.
Q: lf I bring something I believe you need, will you accept it?
M: The love that made you offer will make me accept.
Q: If somebody offers to build you a beautiful Ashram?
M: Let him, by all means. Let him spend a fortune, employ hundreds, feed thousands.
Q: Is it not a desire?
M: Not at all. I am only asking him to do it properly, not stingily, half-heartedly. He is fulfilling his own desire, not mine. Let him do it well and be famous among men and gods.
Q: But do you want it?
M: I do not want it.
Q: Will you accept it?
M: I don't need it.
Q: Will you stay in it?
M: If I am compelled.
Q: What can compel you?
M: Love of those who are in search of light.
Q: Yes, I see your point. Now, how am I to go into samadhi?
M: If you are in the right state, whatever you see will put you into samadhi. After all, samadhi is nothing unusual. When the mind is intensely interested, it becomes one with the object of interest -- the seer and the seen become one in seeing, the hearer and the heard become one in hearing, the lover and the loved become one in loving. Every experience can be the ground for samadhi.
Q: Are you always in a state of samadhi?
M: Of course not Samadhi is a state of mind, after all. I am beyond all experience, even of samadhi. I am the great devourer and destroyer: whatever I touch dissolves into void (akash).
Q: I need samadhis for self-realisation.
M: You have all the self-realisation you need, but you do not trust it. Have courage, trust yourself, go, talk, act; give it a chance to prove itself. With some, realisation comes imperceptibly, but somehow they need convincing. They have changed, but they do not notice it. Such non-spectacular cases are often the most reliable.
Q: Can one believe himself to be realised and be mistaken?
M: Of course. The very idea 'I am self-realised' is a mistake. There is no 'I am this'. 'I am that' in the Natural State.
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orii-blogs-stuff · 9 months ago
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“Where is Charlotte?” Willfried asked, “I thought you said we will be introduced for the first time?”
Florencia sipped on her tea, as if nothing was wrong. Currently, Sylvester was here to tell Wilfried about Charlotte’s adoption into another Duchy, using this convenient excuse, she held a tea party so she could see her eldest son once - how long has it been since she last saw him? One month? Two months? The days blurred together, even more so after Charlotte had left.
Sylvester looked like he had aged by ten years, ‘ Good. ’ Florencia thought to herself, ‘ He deserves to feel a portion of the despair I had felt ever since he took my children away from me. ’
“I was not.” Sylvester said, “I sent a message for a tea party so we could talk about Charlotte.”
“Why should we even care about that girl?” Florencia’s grip around her cup tightened as she heard that voice, “She will not become Aub! My adorable little Grandson would~!”
Florencia kept a calm face, it was becoming much harder to do so these past few weeks, her lips twitched downwards for a moment when she saw Wilfried smile at the woman, “Yes grandmother~!”
Florencia had trouble staying present in the room, not in the physical sense, however, she did find herself drifting off into her own mind, thinking fantastical scenarios. Why had Sylvester given her children away? Why could he not stand up to his mother? Why did he have to be so weak? He was the Aub was he not? He should have been able to come up with a plan so she would have been allowed to keep her children close to her- 
“My Lady?” Florencia was snapped out of her trance, “Are you alright?” Leberecht asked, “Shall I get you a cup of tea?”
Florenica could not remember the meeting nor what had been discussed, that was not to say she did not remember glimpses and flashes of what had occurred - she could only remember the way Wilfried looked at Veronica, how Veronica looked at her . Her vicious, victorious smile, almost as if she was saying, ‘ I won, your son is mine while you only have Sylvester’s lip service, you should try talking to Wilfried, although, I doubt he would recognise you as his mother. ’
“My Lady?”
“I am feeling well… Leberecht.” Florencia said with a smile, “I was… Simply thinking about some things.” She… She wanted that horrible woman gone , not for the first time in her life, Florencia wished she did not marry Sylvester, she wished Sylvester had not been an out-of-season Ewigeliebe so she could have gotten more marriage proposals, whilst she did love him - in the beginning at the very least - she wished her husband was stronger so she would not have to feel the pain of being separated from not one, but two of her children, she wished she had the strength and could have shed the last bits of pride she had as an Archduke candidate from a higher ranked duchy to ask her brother for refuge for herself and her children. ‘ I wish I wish I wish ’, “I wish her dead.” 
“Is that an order?” Leberecht asked.
For perhaps the twentieth time today, Florencia was broken out of her trance, “Excuse me?”
Leberecht bowed and crossed his arms, “My Lady, I am your humble retainer, it is my duty to make sure you are comfortable and it is my duty to make your aspirations come true, I have and always will do whatever you wish of me. When you ask me to jump, my only question could be ‘how high?’. Therefore, My Lady, as your faithful scholar I ask you. Shall I deal with the problem?”
“Give the child to me!” Her Feybeast-in-law said once upon a time, “I shall raise him!”
“Sylvester please!” She begged, still weak from the pregnancy so she could not walk out nor run to her hidden room with Wilfried in her arms.
“Mother I-”
“I raised THREE Archduke candidates! One of them is the Wife of the Greater Duchy of Ahrensbach and the other is you! Aub Ehrenfest! Do you actually believe the second daughter of a third wife is as capable as I am to raise the next heir of Ehrenfest?”
“My Lady?” Leberecht asked.
“Sylvester…” Florencia said, “Please…”
“Promise me.” Florencia said, “Promise me you will not get caught.” She could not bear to lose another person close to her so soon.
“I am sorry…” Sylvester took her baby from her arms and gave him to the Goddess of Chaos incarnate, “Please Mother, take good care of him…”
The Feybeast smiled, “I will.”
Her thoughtful retainer smiled, “I will.”
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wessexroyalfamily · 10 months ago
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{Location: Red Drawing Room, Fogmorre Castle}
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Alberta, The Duchess of Chelsea: Margaret, so good to see you.
Crown Princess Margaret of Wessex: You look amazing for a mama whose just had twins.
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Albie: Well don’t look to closely (chuckles) I’ve had to squeeze every inch of me to fit inside.
Margaret: I felt the same way after Richie. I was an utter walking zombie. Congrats on the Insider article, by the way.
Albie: Ugh, those magazines are always exaggerating things. Only you and your husband know the truth about your marriage. Besides, the only thing they got right in my article was the part about the coffee addiction.
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Margaret: (sighs) I know, I know. I'm fine really. Just not sure if I'm ready to put on a fake smile during dinner. I've been mentally preparing myself all day.
Albie: It's okay not to be okay, Margaret. If you need a break during dinner, just give me a signal. We can escape to the kitchen for a "snack break."
Margaret: (smirking) You're a lifesaver.
Albie: Did Anne talk to you about it?
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Margaret: Of course not. I mean we had tea earlier.
Albie: And she didn't saying anything then?
Margaret: Well not anything helpful. She just encouraged me to talk to him. And I try, but he makes it so impossible.
Albie: George can be the same way sometimes. But seriously, we'll get through this dinner, and then we can have our own version of a spa night later, deal?
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Albie: Your Majesty…Your Royal Highness.
Queen Anne II of Wessex: Girls you both are looking lovely.
The Prince Christian, The Earl of Gloucester: And no need for such formalities tonight, it’s just family.
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Albie: Hopefully we’re not too late.
Christian: Nonsense, frankly you too are the only ones who could have a proper excuse for being late.
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Christian: Sorry I missed you for tea this afternoon dear. How is that grandson of mine?
Margaret: Sadly a bit nicked that his favorite Papa hasn’t seen him yet? But don’t worry I’m sure it’s nothing a bit of candy from you after dinner can’t fix.
Christian: Oh good it’s fixable (laughs) wouldn’t want to be on the bad side of a toddler.
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Christian: By the way, if you were looking for your husband he’s over there talking to cousin Arthur.
Margaret: Has he said anything to you?
Christian: Not anything more than you have.
Margaret: So nothing.
Christian: (disappointed) Though I wish one of you would.
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Anne II: What was that?
Christian: What was what?
Anne II: I thought we agreed that you weren’t going to meddle.
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Christian: I don’t think that’s meddling, just…merely stating facts of who’s in the room and who’s not.
Anne II: Yes we’ll, you’d do very good to keep your observations to yourself for the rest of the evening.
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Albie: Stop stalling and just go over there.
Margaret: I can’t now he’s talking to people.
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Albie: He’s only talking to cousin Arthur, and you know what a bore he can be. Probably babbling on about the old days of empire.
Margaret: Even so I just can’t…
Albie: As your sister-in-law, I’ll polite suggest that you sack up and go talk to your husband.
Margaret: *sighs*
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Prince Arthur, The Earl of Falmouth: I’m excited to be joining you on the upcoming Devon tour.
Crown Prince William of Wessex: I didn’t realize that you were coming?
Arthur: I was a last minute addition, so to speak. Extra support for your mother.
William: Yeah, the palace has already bumped up my list of engagements.
Arthur: The government advised the Queen to have you both out and seen more before the election. It seems the Republican National Party has a real shot of winning this year.
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David Worcester-Scott: Would that be so bad? If they won I mean.
Arthur: The Duchy of Devon is Wessex’s greatest crown dependency. As Duke it is the Queen’s job, and by extension William’s, ensure that our relationship with the Devonians remain intact as it has since the reign of Richard I.
David: But surely you agree that the Devonians deserve some greater form of free rule.
Arthur: Surely I do not.
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William: David just means he thinks the national council in Devon should have greater autonomy.
Arthur: A Wessex sovereign has been the nominal Duke for the last 12 monarchs. Give the Devonians more autonomy and mark my words, you my boy, won’t be the 13th.
David: And that’s another thing I never understood, why do they call The Queen, Duke there and not Duchess.
Arthur: (sarcastically) I suppose you wouldn’t. Clearly tradition and history is something that is lost on the minds of the youth.
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Margaret: Hope I’m not interrupting.
Arthur: Margaret me dear you’re looking beautiful than ever this evening.
Margaret: Arthur, so good to see you, Happy All Saints.
(William and David having inaudible conversation in the background)
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Margaret: William could I speak to you in private for a moment.
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Margaret: I figured I’d save you from cousin Arthur.
William: Yeah, save me but abandon cousin Arthur to more of David’s republicanism (awkward laugh)
Margaret: I also figured we could talk…about us.
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William: Oh come on Margaret not here. Honestly, we should have this conversation in private later on.
Margaret: Will we have it? You haven’t even been to see me or Richie yet.
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William: This is why I’ve been avoiding coming to see you, I knew you’d want to start fight.
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