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xx-scene-queen-fangz-xx · 20 days

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We can live like jack and sally if we want

AN: Fine…. I made a part 2. Shout out 2 @m1k3yrr3v3ng3 ur my homie 4eva!!! (ps: if ur a swiftie who only knows Fall Out Boy from electric touch or a prep: DONT FUCKING FLAME)

Warnings: Self insert, like one sexual refrance, Brendon Urie mention

Every girl dreams of their wedding day, signifying your undying love for your partner, but god was it always blown out of proportion. All the festivities and speeches and people really got on my nerves, apparently nothing says love like a shit ton of money wasted. That plus the fact that my boyfriend is famous just sealed the deal that eloping was truly the best option.

I stood in the tiny room looking at myself in the mirror. I had on short strapless black dress that had a hot pink sash around my waist with a bow on it, pink and black striped arm warmers and knee high socks, hot pink high top convers, Kandi braclets, and a Bartskull necklace. My hair was perfect with the side swept bangs falling just right extenuating the layers and my eyeliner was the best I have ever done it.

Thoughts rushed threw my head, I was so exicited to marry the love of my life but worried that he did not want to do this. What if he never showed up, what if he he ditched me for some other prettier girl, what if he regrets it, what if….. what if.

My thoughts were soon intrupted by the ringing of my sidekick. It ended up being a five way call between Me, Gabe, William, Travie, and Brandon. They all congratulated me and Pete on our wedding, said how much they wanted to be there but could not due to time, and wished us luck. The call was short due to them wanting to have time to talk to Pete but It was really sweet of them to do that for us.

Just as soon as the clock struck twenty past nine Patrick walked into my room to check on me. “Ri are you okay you were ment to call me 10 minutes ago” he asked causing me to turn around. “Ya sorry it’s just I needed some help getting ready” I replied with a soft sigh. “Is everything okay?” Patrick asked as we sat down on the floor. “I’m just scared that Pete is going to ditch me for some prettier MySpace girl and this is all a setup.” I said holding back tears as Patrick grabed some tissues from the table. “There is no need to worry, all he talked about as he got ready was how excited he was and how much he loved you and how pretty you’re gonna look.” “Really” I said as I looked at him. “Positive”

We both got up as I felt better about the situation, I’m happy my anxiety did not get the better of me. He soon left the room and I shortly followed. As soon as I got to the door I took a deep breath and stepped out as the wedding March played from an IPod speaker. It was in a really nice square like gazebo, there were these tiny led lights twinkling around the sides of the area, the night sky was full of stars and the moon was the brightest I have ever seen it.

I walked down the aisle with each step meaning more than the last. I saw Pete standing at the end of the isle and he looked so handsome. He had on: a black button up with the top button unbutton and shirt untucked, matching black jeans, red low top convers, and a red tie. His bangs covered half his left eye and his eye liner was so good. The rest of the boys also wore casual outfits consisting of button ups and jeans, Patrick was more dressed up in a blazer and fedora due to him officiating.

As soon as I got to the end of the isle I felt Pete’s hand on mine causing me to blush right as he pulled me in to a hug, waiting for Patrick to start the ceremony. Joe and Andy waited near the side as Patrick in the middle as he cleared his voice.

“Dearly beloved, we are gathered here tonight to witness the Marriage of Pete Wentz and Ri Morrison. We should keep this brief so I won’t ramble so, I guess we will start with vows.” He stated as he gave the side eye to Pete to start his vows.

“Ri, I have no god damn idea how I ended up with a girl as perfect as you. You are the angel in my nightmares, the Light to my darkness, the Jack to my Sally. I don’t care if the world hates you, because I love you, I mean it. I vow to protect you, to heal your broken soul just like you did with mine, and love you till the world ends. Till Death do us part my Clandestine Queen.”

I looked into his handsome hazel eyes as my cheeks were painted in A hot flush. Each word spoken felt like heaven. I still not over the fact that this is really happening, not only did I find my soulmate but we’re actully getting married.

“Pete, you are my soulmate, simple and clean. We are two broken souls intertwined in a dance that when together, are healed. I always knew deep down we would be together. You’re truly the only person who truly understands me, not just seeing me as a pretty face or a stupid joke. I vow to give you all my love, to be your muse, to mend the wounds of your tortured soul like you did with mine. Through life and death, I will love you.”

I was holding back tears as he kissed my forehead softly and sweetly. It felt like a reminder of how deep and true his love is, causing my cheeks to be painted a darker shade of red.

We were handed the rings by Joe, the rings were matching with black bases. Mine was like the deluxe version of my engagement ring and it was the cutest ring I ever seen with the pink gem being shaped like a heart.

We extanged our rings, as he held my smaller hand in his hands. I heard him whisper a soft “I do” as he placed the ring on my right hand and kissed said hand. I placed the other ring on his finger and softly whispered back “I do”

“And with the power vested in me by the state of Illinois, I pronounce you husband and wife, you my know kiss the bride,” Stated Patrick. And just like that….. I officially became Ms. Ri Wentz.

Just as they thought hit my mind I felt Pete’s lips on mine. the kiss was Sweet yet passionet, like it was a flower given at a funeral. Our tounges slid together like a lock and a key. The world stoped for just a moment as the two of us inter locked out lips.

As the kiss broke we looked into eachothers eyes, his hazel ones glued to my gray ones. The warmth of our love surrounded the two of us as I nuzzled my head around his neck to rest it on his shoulders and let out light tears of joy. We stood like that for a solid few minutes as the rest of the guys clapped and got the music ready for our first dance.

“May I have this dance?” I asked shyly as Pete took my hand into his, we started slowly dancing as Blink-182’s I Miss You played on the speaker. It was truly our song, it matched us so perfectly, it was ment for us.

Hello there, The angel from my nightmare, The shadow in the background of the morgue, The unsuspecting victim, Of darkness in the valley, We can live like Jack and Sally if we want, Where you can always find me, And we'll have Halloween on Christmas, And in the night, we'll wish this never ends, We'll wish this never ends

We danced to the music as our eyes met, lights shining like never before. It was the most romantic thing I have ever expirenced in my life. He looked so perfect, his smile warm and loving.

Where are you? And I'm so sorry, I cannot sleep, I cannot dream tonight, I need somebody and always, This sick, strange darkness, Comes creeping on, so haunting every time, And as I stare, I counted, The webs from all the spiders, Catching things and eating their insides’ Like indecision to call you’ And hear your voice of treason, Will you come home and stop this pain tonight, Stop this pain tonight

The dance kept up as he started to spin me around, the lights dancing around the corners of my eyes. He whispered soft sweet nothings as we swayed to the music.

Don't waste your time on me, you're already, The voice inside my head (I miss you, I miss you) Don't waste your time on me, you're already, The voice inside my head (I miss you, I miss you) Don't waste your time on me, you're already, The voice inside my head (I miss you, I miss you) Don't waste your time on me, you're already, The voice inside my head (I miss you, I miss you)

As the song came to an end he dipped me down towards the ground as both our hands and our lips interlocked for a sweet kiss. “I love you so much” he stated softly “I love you too, handsome” I said in a cooing voices that sounded like a moan. “Is my bride getting needy, don’t worry baby, I’ll treat you so good tonight” I blushed as those words came out of his mouth.

The first dance ended as the rest of the boys were clapping. It felt as if for one moment, the world stoped. It was truly only us and our love that mattered. We looked out to the stars the back at eachother with a blush.

“Till death do us part my Clandestine Queen”

#random scene rambles #pete wentz #fall out boy #fangirling #fall out boy fanfic #fanfic #self insert fanfiction #self indulgence at its finest

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flawedamythyst · 4 years

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Old Guard Headcanon that, wow, got long.

So, the general assumption is that Joe has just been drawing Nicky for nine hundred years, right? Sketchbooks just filled with his face? Which is fair and accurate but, consider that as obsessive fanfolks we have experience with what it’s like to dedicate years to drawing/writing about the same one or two people, and what tends to happen once you’ve worked with the ‘canon’ version for long enough to want something a bit different.

Yes, that’s right. After a hundred years of whatever of just drawing Nicky as he is, Joe branched out into AUs and fantasies and excuses to draw Nicky in a range of weird and wonderful costumes. By the time Nile starts flicking through his art, it’s not something he even thinks about any more.

Joe: “Oh, that’s Nicky as a space pirate. Look at his little boots! And, look, here’s our spaceship, it’s called The Malta.”

Nile: “So you’re a space pirate too? Have you drawn yourself?”

Nicky, pointedly: “Yes, my heart, have you drawn yourself?”

Joe, with a dismissive wave: “There’s nothing interesting about drawing me.”

Nicky: *quiet sigh, because he’s spent a lot of time trying to convince Joe that he should include himself in his AUs*

Joe: “And here, look, this sketchbook is all about what Nicky would be like if he were partly cat. He likes climbing to high places but sometimes gets stuck and, look, this one is how he looks when you stroke his belly.”

Nile, staring at the art: “Oh god. You’ve drawn catboy!Nicky.”

Because they’re from before books were a thing normal people could afford and it was all oral story-telling, all the Old Guard pre-Booker have a tendency to make stories up and then tell them to each other. Joe’s always include art, and almost always have Nicky as the main character.

Joe: “This is Nicky as a djinn. He’s not tied to a lamp or a ring, though, he’s tied to a sniper rifle. Any time someone pulls the trigger, he appears and grants them three wishes.”

Nile, faintly: “His pants are see-through.”

Joe, without shame: “Of course.”

Andy, settling in with a glass of vodka for storytime: “So he’s trapped in the rifle?”

Joe: “Yes, he is a slave to the magic that ties him there, forced to grant wishes even when they are not to his liking. A lot of the people who use the rifle are not nice men, and wish for power or people to die.”

Nicky: “Oh no, Joe, I don’t like this.”

Joe, comfortingly patting his leg: “And then one day the rifle is given to a young artist who has been pressed into fighting a war against invaders, but who just wants to return to his studio.”

Nicky: “Is he handsome?”

Joe, shrugging: “He’s okay.”

Nicky: “I bet he’s the most handsome man the djinn has ever seen.”

Joe, blushing: “Well, perhaps.”

Andy, knocking back vodka: “Enough flirting, what happens next?”

Joe: “The artist uses the gun and the djinn appears and offers him three wishes. The artist is overwhelmed by the djinn’s ethereal beauty-”

Andy, with warning, because these stories have descended into poetry about Nicky’s looks before and she’s not in the mood for that tonight: “Joe.”

Joe: “-but he is in the middle of the battle and doesn’t have time to properly appreciate it. He immediately makes his first wish, for the war to end, and the djinn grants it, sending the invaders back where they came from. He takes longer to make his second wish, because the end of the war has been all he’s focused on for so long, but in the end he wishes for a home to live in, by the sea.”

Nicky: “Oh, that’s nice.”

Joe: “That is what the djinn thinks too. He has granted many wishes but he has never had the chance to create a home before. He uses his magic to build a house on a cliff, with a path down to a beach and a wide balcony where the artist can look out at the horizon, and an art studio that catches all the evening light, and a garden with a grove of ancient olive trees-”

Andy: “Are you just describing your place in Malta?”

Joe: “Perhaps. It’s a nice house. A good home.”

Nicky with heart eyes, taking his hand: “My love.”

Nile, clearing her throat: “And the third wish?”

Joe: “Ah, well, the artist finds that harder. Now he has a home, and the land has peace, he can’t think of anything else he needs. He asks the djinn to wait and the djinn is happy to, living in his house with him, taking walks on the beach, discovering all the things he has not been able to see or do while trapped inside the rifle. Days pass, and then weeks, and the artist almost forgets that he has another wish, and that the djinn isn’t just a close friend who lives with him.”

Nile: “Okay, but does the djinn get proper pants while that’s happening, or is his junk on display the whole time?”

Joe: “The artist finds him other clothes so that he could blend in with the local people, but in the evenings when they sit on the balcony together and watch the sunset, the djinn returns to the way he is most comfortable.”

Nile, muttering: “Nobody’s comfortable in see-through pants.”

Joe, ignoring her: “And then one day the artist looks at the djinn and realises that although it is a very nice house, it is only a home because the djinn is there, and that he loves him.”

Nicky lets out a happy sigh.

Joe: “And he realises that the only thing he wants to wish for his third wish is for the djinn to stay with him always. But that is not a wish you can make for another person, it must be their choice to stay, so instead the artist takes the djinn’s hand and wishes for him to be free to go wherever he wants, and to grant whatever wishes he pleases, and to not be tied to the rifle any more. Because true love is wanting someone to choose their own path to happiness.”

Nicky, tears in eyes: “Joe, let me finish the story. I know exactly how it ends. The djinn stays in the house with the artist, and dedicates the rest of his life to making him happy because he is the most beautiful, generous soul the djinn has ever met and he can’t believe how lucky he was that he was the one who took up his rifle.”

Joe, beaming back at him: “Exactly so, habibi. They melt the rifle down together and forge the metal into rings instead, and they marry each other with them.”

Nicky, overcome: “Oh.”

He pulls Joe into a kiss. It goes on for a while.

Andy: “That was okay but it needed more action. There should have been more fight scenes. Maybe some light maiming.”

Which isn’t to say that Joe lets Nile look through all his sketchbooks, of course. There’s one in particular, from when he first saw a copy of the Kama Sutra, that features a drawing of him and Nicky in every single sexual position that is even vaguely plausible. On rainy afternoons when there’s not much else going on, Nicky flicks through and picks a random page, and they try and re-enact it. It isn’t always the most successful sex they’ve ever had, but they have a lot of fun trying to get the positions to work.

Joe also has a semi-popular webcomic, which he doesn’t get to update as regularly as he wants because of missions. It’s about the adventures of Nico Mouse, who’s a mouse living on a farm, who gets caught up in a war that the fieldmice launch against the mice who live in the house. During the war, he realises that fieldmice and house mice are the same and the war is futile, and then meets a house mouse called Josef who he falls in love with. They run away to live in the barn together, and work on reconciling their two different mouse tribes.

Andy has no idea about it, which is good because she would lose her shit, but Booker found it years ago. In exile, he follows it religiously and posts anon comments on every single update (that Joe 100% knows are coming from him, because Booker is not subtle) and cries when Joe introduces a vole called Sebi, who has lost all his family but creates a new one with Nico and Josef and the other exiles who live in the barn.

#the old guard #Immortal husbands #Headcanon #well more like 5 headcanons slapped together #and what is basically a ficlet as well

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nevermindirah · 3 years

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Dorothy Freeman facts

By facts I of course mean headcanons, because Nile's mom doesn't get a first name in canon (or even confirmation that her last name is Freeman). All we know about her is the picture on Nile's phone lock screen (which is Kiki Layne's real-life mom and brother!) and a few lines that Nile tells Andy about her. I’ve been collecting my Dorothy headcanons for a while now to eventually make a post, and @mprosperossprite‘s excellent post giving non-Americans context for what it means that Nile is from the South Side of Chicago prompted me to go ahead and share this. Disclaimer that I’m white and I will absolutely make corrections if it’s pointed out that I’ve caused harm with any of this.

So here have some fun facts about the version of Mama Freeman who lives in my head rent-free:

Her family and growing up:

she was born in the mid-'60s and named after Dorothy Dandridge

I can’t decide whether she was born in Chicago or moved there later on (maybe with Nile’s dad?) and when in the waves of the Great Migration her family left the South

she came of age in the "post"-Civil Rights movement and went to college in the mid-80s when a lot of what are now the foundational classics of Black feminism were being written

she was a young adult when Anita Hill risked so much to report that a Supreme Court nominee had sexually harassed her, and as a result she HATES Joe Biden

Marriage and babies:

she met Nile's father — I can’t decide how they met and I have two competing headcanons for his name, either Gideon for the hefty Biblical masculinity vibes (Giddy for short among family, that man loved to laugh) or Carl, which started out as a shitty Carl’s Jr burger chain joke that turns out to be perfect (it means free man!), and @knoepfchen used it in the sequel to if you do take a thief where Carl is alive!! — and Dorothy was a little skeptical of his near-religious devotion to the military but he was really hot and really devoted to her and they made it work

she's a little pissed that she was right but it's unbearable if she thinks about it too often

it's going to be a long, long time before she can look back on pictures of Baby Nile stomping around the house in her dad's combat boots (this is a Gina Prince Bythewood headcanon, whyyyyyyyy can I not find a link to where she said this)

she named their second baby Indus, Indy for short (this is nearly as established fanon in Book of Nile circles as how much Booker loves eating pussy, and Indy Freeman as a young adult is portrayed by either Aldis Hodge or John Boyega I don’t make the rules)

Work:

Dorothy did some office jobs but nothing really grabbed her, and she was probably gonna have to move for her husband's career, so she decided on teaching — high school humanities

she’s been active in CTU (one of the strongest teacher’s unions in the US) her whole career and one year she was on the bargaining committee and her babies know damn well never to trust a boss, not even one who says all the right things — if she ever finds out the way Nile said "like Quynh?" when Andy promised to protect her, she will lose her mind with pride

(Nile was 18 and freshly graduated from high school in 2012 when CTU went on strike for the first time in a generation and she brought her mom snacks on the picket line)

one of her very favorite things is getting her students to laugh despite themselves at her "oh my GOD you're so EMBARRASSING" old-people jokes

she's one of those teachers who can get 30+ teenagers to go dead silent with judicious application of body language

she's known to occasionally go easy on grading subjective things like essays when she knows students are having a particularly rough time at home, but the second she gets the feeling they're taking advantage and not trying their best that shit is over and they better mind their Ps & Qs

she's the kind of person who says old-people shit like that

she gives her students assignments like "help 5 neighbors register to vote" and "write a compare/contrast table about the candidates in this local election" and "research 5 different ways you could get grant money to do X" and other practical civic-minded shit

standardized testing is her supervillain origin story, just kidding it’s Rahm Emanuel, why the fuck did Obama trust that asshole

After her husband died:

she would have lost her goddamn mind if it weren't for her church friends after her husband died, people from the church raised money so they could make ends meet while his pension paperwork was taking forever, church friends watched Indy so Nile could go out for the soccer team, etc etc

she sold her and her late husband's house and moved to a 3-bedroom co-op unit when Nile started high school, it's more affordable and it meant she didn't have to worry about household repairs in the same way, she can use a wrench if she needs to but she doesn't have time and it just makes her grief flare up (co-op housing has a long history in Chicago and other US cities (like Washington DC where I live) as a way for Black people to access decent, affordable housing in the face of entrenched discrimination)

the move meant putting a longer commute between her and church, but she didn't even bother looking for a church closer to their new home, she loaded the kids into the car on the weekends, parking is hell in their new neighborhood but it's worth giving up a hard-won parking spot to not have to wait so long for the L on Sunday mornings

Indy lived with her through college and he was gearing up to get his own place when Nile died, Dorothy was planning to move into a one-bedroom in the co-op building because she doesn't need so much space anymore, Indy took a day off from his new job (not so new anymore, her baby's so grown!) to help her sort things to donate when those dress-uniform Marines came to their door

part of her wishes she could've been home more and not had to rely on Nile so much for help with Indy, but he's turned out such a kind young man, and he's a much better cook than his sister is (was, oh God — no wait, is! she’s alive! what do you mean you’ve been alive all this time??)

some of the girls from church are encouraging her to check out this social dancing thing, nobody's pressuring her to date but there's definitely been some ribbing, and with Indy out of the house... maybe? probably not, but maybe

Her feelings and beliefs and likes and dislikes:

she's an absolute badass and also she's a soft human woman with lots of feelings

she's very, very traditional in some ways, and part of her mixed feelings about Nile following in her dad's footsteps is gender stuff, she's proud of her daughter and would never stand in the way of what Nile wants to do with her life, and if Nile came home and told her she's a lesbian she would never reject her, but if Nile came home and told her she's bisexual maybe she can just try focusing on men? “I love you sweetheart and I want you to be happy I just know how hard it is already for us in this world” type shit

she has been on team natural hair basically her entire life and one of the worst fights she and Nile ever had was over Nile wanting to straighten her hair as a pre-teen

Indy takes more after her and Nile takes more after their dad, she's so proud of both of them, but Dorothy's activism was mostly wearing her natural hair to work and daring bosses to give her shit, Indy's out there marching in the streets like her parents had and she WORRIES

she teases Indy for going to so many protests like he's using it as an excuse to meet girls, but she WORRIES

when she turns 60, she gets box braids with streaks of dark purple, subtle enough that it's still work-appropriate but it makes her smile, she may be old now but damnit she’s still pretty!

she loves Grey's Anatomy and Star Trek and she watched Bridgerton all in one day

she has a dirty-old-lady celebrity crush on Chris Hemsworth

if she's ever masturbated thinking about Donna Summer, well, that's nobody's business but her own (do non-Americans know about the queen of disco??)

If you want to read fic featuring Dorothy:

I won't have to leave alone, 1000 words, Nile has a nightmare and decides to go tell her family she's immortal

I See Your Eyes Seek a Distant Shore, 65k, Nile adjusts to immortality and does a lot of soul searching about what it means to "do what we think is right", Booker goes to grad school for trauma studies, the working title of this fic was Booker Reads Edward Said and Gloria Anzaldúa and Goes Down on Nile and the final product has an annotated bibliography in the author's notes if you’re into that kind of thing, a lot of my Dorothy Freeman headcanons were born of my process writing this

Gather round the table, we'll give you a treat, 2279 words, college AU, Nile brings her Jewish boyfriend home for Christmas

a contribution I made to Shitty Old Guard Deaths: (Booker, USA, 2025, cause of death: a mother’s righteous wrath)

#nile freeman #nile's family #dorothy freeman #tog headcanons #tog meta #mine #long post

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cantteachanoldguardnewquotes · 2 years

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Febuwhump Day 2 Failed Rescue Attempt

Warnings: missing people, talk of past deaths

A03

Andy counted the heads as they filed back into the tiny, cramped cabin. A storm was gathering outside and it halted the research until it cleared up, could be hours or it could be days. She counted the heads again, just to be sure but she was definitely missing two.

"Are there two more behind you?" She asked the last person who entered the cabin.

"I didn't see anyone else, is someone missing?" She asked alarmed.

"I did a head count and we're missing two." Andy told her.

"Who is it?"

"I haven't figured it out yet," It was hard to differentiate between all the hats, gloves and thick puffy coats. She turned to the team. "Hey, hey listen up, were missing two people and we need to figure out who it is and if anyone's seen them yet."

Everyone took stock of who was here and she realized who was missing. "Joe and Nicky. It's Joe and Nicky. Who saw them last? Did they not see us packing up and leaving? Does anyone know why they didn't make it back?"

"They were securing the equipment we couldn't carry back with us. I thought they were right behind us though." Andrew said.

"Ok, then they can't be far behind. You all stay here and I'm going to go out and look for them."

"Andy that will be far to reckless!" Molly said grabbing her arm. "Look out the window at the storm, you'll never find your way there and back!"

"I have to try." Andy said as she shrugged off her hand and put her hood up. "I'll be alright just keep the lights on."

She trudged out into the snow making sure she kept careful stock of the path she was leaving so she wouldn't lose it on her way back. The snow was blowing everywhere and she didn't even want to know what the temperature was. She also was trying to forget the hundred different ways this could go wrong. "Joe!" She called, the wind snatching her voice away. "Nicky!" She yelled their names over and over as she walked, hoping she was going the right way, wishing she had more to go off of than her internal compass. The snow made it nearly impossible to see more than a couple feet in front of her, the path was quickly disappearing, she kept going, she had to find them. They all knew from experience how bad it was dying from the cold it was slow and painful, your body shutting down just fast enough that your healing couldn't quite keep up.

She made it to the equipment and they were no where to be seen. Where could they have gone? She could feel the cold clawing it's way inside her making her feet and face hurt, and she knew hypothermia would set in fast in these conditions.

She slowly made her way over to what she hoped was the hummer they had parked nearby, maybe they had been able to hide in it. It took a while to find with the snow causing the visibility to be so limited, but she yanked open the door and called their names, climbing inside to give her face a break from the wind even for a moment.

They weren't in there. She didn't know where else they could be, there weren't any other hiding places, they weren't answering her and she knew it was practically useless to keep wandering around, she wasn't sure if she would make it back herself.

She decided to go back to the cabin and see if they had made it back yet, she hoped they had, she hoped with everything in her they wouldn't have to stay the night out in the open in this.

She made it back to the cabin, to find the rest of the team eagerly waiting for her.

"Did you find them?"

"Are you alright?"

"Any sign of them?"

They bombarded her with their questions.

She shook her head, "I'd hoped they would have made it back on their own by now."

"We'll go out looking with you." A few of them said quickly.

"Here I have flashlights, not enough for everyone, but it will help." Charlene, pressed a flashlight into Andy's hand. "We'll find them."

Andy was fairly certain in the long run Joe and Nicky would be fine, but her hopes of finding them before dawn or before this let up weren't high. She gratefully accepted the flashlight, "Alright, stay close so that you can see someone's flashlight at all times, don't do anything risky or foolish. We'll comb the area till we get to where we were then go out fifty feet in all directions." She saw everyone nodding, and hoped she wouldn't lose anyone else.

They headed out and very slowly, very carefully, searched the entire area. Andy kept tabs as best she could on how long they'd been searching so that there would be minimal risk of anyone getting frost bite.

At the thirty minute mark she knew she had to call it quits, if it was just her she wouldn't worry about continuing but she was to scared she would do irreparable damage to one of the others in the search party. "We're turning back!" She called to each side. She heard the shouts passed down, and slowly started the hike back.

Everyone made it back to the cabin safely, and she was disappointed again when Joe and Nicky weren't there waiting for them.

"All of you warm up and get dry I'm going back out." Andy announced.

"Not without me you're not." Mark said, firmly.

"I'll go to." Anne told her.

"No, I can't have any of you coming down with something."

"You've already been out twice, you'll catch you're death before any of us."

Andy chewed the inside of her cheek trying to figure out how to keep them inside without blowing her immortal cover. "I'll be fine, you just worry about yourselves."

"You can't go back out by yourself."

"I'll be fine."

"No."

She knew Joe and Nicky would never want the team to get hurt on their behalf, so she put up her hands, "Then I'll stay in and we can search again at dawn. I know Joe and Nicky have a lot of survival knowledge and they'll mostly be ok."

Everyone agreed with her and settled in for the night.

Andy hoped and wished this would clear up soon, she wished she had been paying more attention to the weather and hadn't been taken by surprise, she wished Joe and Nicky were safe.

She didn't bother trying to sleep just sat by the window with all the lights on hoping it would be a beacon that they could see. It finally cleared up around seven, the clouds let just the smallest bit of morning light through.

Movement caught her eye and she wondered what kind of animal wasn't still be hiding after all that. A moment later she realized it was two people walking slowly through the snow towards the cabin.

Andy flung open the door with only her boots on and ran outside to meet them. "Joe! Nicky! I was so worried about you are you alright?" She brought them into a fierce hug. "What happened? You guys aren't allowed to scare me like that!"

"We're sorry, Andy, truly sorry, but we're ok." Nicky said.

"We'll tell you inside, you don't even have a coat on in all this." Joe added.

"It doesn't matter, I'm just relieved to see you both."

The three walked back into the cabin and Anne quickly brought them all hot green tea and blankets. They sat close to the fire place and started explaining what happened.

"We secured the equipment, hoping it wouldn't blow away in the storm." Joe started.

"When we looked up everyone was gone." Nicky added.

"We walked for a long time in the direction we thought the cabin was, but we couldn't find it and by then we couldn't get our bearings on what direction we had been walking."

"We found shelter under a large rock that kept us a little dry and cut down on some of the wind."

"Do you need a hospital? I can't imagine you're ok after spending the night out in that." Oscar asked.

Both Nicky and Joe waved them off. "No, No, we'll be fine."

"I looked for you. We all did, I had to stop before I lost anyone else." Andy said, still feeling bad that she hadn't been able to find them.

"Thank you, Andy, really we're ok." Nicky told her, putting his arm around her and pulling her closer.

"We'll be more careful next time boss." Joe said with a grin, raising his cup to her slightly.

Andy grinned back, suddenly exhausted now that she wasn't so worried. "You'd better be."

#The Old Guard #Andy #Joe #Nicky #immortal husbands #Twi writes sometimes

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f0blove · 3 years

Text

Keep You Like An Oath (Patrick Stump)

I turn the knob, not bothering to knock, and shove the door open with my shoulder.

“You will NEVER guess what happened to-oh” I pause as I see only Andy and Joe sitting on the couch. “Hey guys. Sorry I thought Patrick would be home”

I grin at them and plop my bag down on the floor, kicking the door shut behind me. “No worries, YN” Joe says with a laugh “what’s up”

“Just a rough day at school” I say with an eye roll, glancing around the room.

“Sorry to hear that” he replies, “and Patrick is home, just grabbing something out of the bathroom I think”

“Oh perfect, thanks!” I say, perking up. I cross the room quickly, not hesitating before swinging the door of the connecting bathroom open.

“Wait not-” I hear as it opens, but it’s too late.

“Oh god!” I say, greeted with a full view of fully naked Pete, towel drying his hair. I shut the door before Pete has a chance to respond.

“Yeah not that bathroom….sorry” Joe says, him and Andy laughing behind me.

“Little late to tell me that now don’t you think” I say with a glare in his direction.

Pete comes out of the door, towel now wrapped around his waist. “We really need some boundaries in this house” he says with a mocking grin.

“My bad, thought you were Patrick” I say sheepishly.

“Oh trying to catch a naked glimpse of him instead?” pete responds, waggling his eyebrows.

“Of course not” I say, grabbing a pillow off the couch and chucking it in his direction. “Now go put some clothes on”

Pete laughs but listens, turning to walk down the hallway into his room.

“You really set me up for failure” I say, dropping down onto the couch near the boys.

“Or success… depends on how you see it,” Andy says with a grin.

“Then definitely failure” i quip back, “but anyway, what are you guys up to?” They delve into an explanation of whatever video game they had just started, and pete walks back into the room, appropriately clothed.

“Sorry to end the show, but I thought I should get dressed,” he says with a wink, sitting down on the couch across from us.

“Ugh I am never going to live this down am I?” I say in despair.

“Live what down?” Patrick says, coming down the stairs and nodding in my direction.

“Patrick finally! I have so much to tell you!” I say happily, standing up.

“Hey don’t change the subject, what embarrassing thing did you do today?” Patrick asks, grinning at me.

“ Walked in on Pete, completely naked” Joe fills in immediately.

“Still dripping from my shower, might I add” Pete chimes in.

“ Not much for boundaries today huh?” Patrick asks with a laugh, poking me in the sides playfully. I feel the heat rise in my cheeks.

“It really is not a big deal! Let’s just move on...please?” I ask.

“Aw come on, but it's so fun to tease! And double whammy- embarrassing for you and Pete” Joe laughs.

“Oh seriously, it’s not like it’s anything I haven’t seen before” I say quickly, not realizing.

“YN what the hell” Pete says immediately, glancing at Patrick.

“What does that mean?” Patrick says, confusedly looking in my direction, “have you seen Pete naked before?”

My eyes widen with realization, and I see Pete shaking his head in my direction. “Oh, you know. Just in past accidents, just like this one” i say feebly.

Patrick stares at me for a second. “You’re saying you’ve accidentally seen Pete completely naked….more than once?”

“Mm hmm” I say, glancing at the ground and trying to ignore Pete’s burning gaze.

Patrick looks between Pete and I, staring at me until I meet his eyes.

“You’re totally lying right now” He says, shock in his voice

“Am not” I say

“Definitely are too” Patrick says, walking over and staring directly at me. “What gives?”

I open my mouth, dreading everys second.

“YN don't,” Pete says in a warning tone.

Patrick turns to stare at him and confusion, before glancing at Andy and Joe who are watching, entertained, before turning back to look at me. I stare at the floor, unsure of how to get out of this situation.

“Oh my god will someone just say what’s going on” Patrick says in exasperation.

“Patrick,” I say calmly, “it’s not that big of a deal” I glance at Pete, who’s staring at me with intensity.

“Then just say it, what’s with all this secrecy?” Patrick says, throwing his hands up in the air.

“Fine, fine” I give in, “Pete and I slept together. No big deal”

“You what?” Patrick exclaims, immediately glaring at Pete.

“Trick, seriously, no big deal” Pete says, holding his hands up in surrender.

“No big deal??” Patrick says, almost yelling, crossing the room in seconds to where Pete is standing. “Are you fucking kidding me?” He jabs Pete in the chest, turning back to glare at me.

“Patrick calm down, what the hell!” I say, shocked. I can’t remember the last time I saw Patrick so angry, let alone at me.

“The one person Pete! The one fucking person!” Patrick's yelling now. “I told you to leave her alone! She’s my best friend. What happened to off limits?” he shoves Pete in the chest.

“Woah woah woah” I yell, crossing the room and inserting myself between the two boys, both glaring at each other.

“You need to calm down dude, this doesn’t need to be a thing” Pete says, anger growing in his voice.

“What don’t you understand about off limits?” Patrick says, no longer yelling, but a voice full of anger. I can practically see his eyes flashing.

“Okay okay, sit down! Both of you!” I yell this time, and both boys snap out of it, looking at me. With one more huff, Patrick backs off and sits on the couch.

“Okay, I appreciate the protectiveness and the care, Pat, I do” I say to Patrick, pissed off. “But in no way is it okay that you told them I was “Off limits” I say with finger quotes.

“I just-” Patrick starts, looking guilty.

“No, I'm yelling now!” I say, angrily. “I know you want to protect me, but you have absolutely zero right to dictate what I do with my body, and you have no right to decide for me who I interact with!”

Patrick looks down in shame, ears turning red.

“I’m a grown ass woman, and I am perfectly capable of making my own decisions, I don't need you telling me what to do. That doesn’t make you protective, it just makes you an ass”

Patrick blanches, but nods. “You’re absolutely right, I’m sorry YN”

“You should be! If i want to sleep with all of them I will, because that’s my choice, NOT yours’ I say with a pointed glare. I pause, looking around at the other guys. “To make it clear I don’t want that, just making a point” Joe and Pete chuckle.

Patrick glares at Pete quickly but looks back at me. “Im sorry YN you’re right, I just didn’t want you to get hurt”

“Well I appreciate that but i’m fine. It was a drunken fling, it happened months ago, and I’m fine. Pete’s just another guy”

“Hey!” Pete interjects. I glared at him with a this-isn't-helping stare. He looks away.

“Wait, this happened months ago?” Patrick says quietly.

“Yeah” I say, “back in the summer. After I broke up with Brian”

“So…. almost six months ago” Patrick says, hurt in his eyes. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because we thought you’d react like this!” I say exasperatedly.

“So you all knew?” Patrick says, looking around at the guys. They nod, albeit looking ashamed.

“Cool. really cool guys” Patrick says, irritated.

“I’m sorry Patrick” I say.

“I'm sorry too man, we just didn’t want you to freak out over nothing '' Pete says, putting a hand on Patrick’s shoulder.

“Over nothing?” Patrick responds angrily, staring at Pete before looking up at me, betrayal clear in his eyes. “Right”

He shrugs Pete's hand off his shoulder, standing up from the couch. He brushes past me, not even looking at me when I say his name. He marches angrily down the hallway, and I hear the back door open, and then slam.

“Well that went well” I said dryly. “ We should've just told him earlier” I cross my arms over my chest.

“That wouldn’t have helped,” Pete says. “He still would’ve been pissed”

“I don’t get what his problem is. I know he’s protective and we tell each other everything but that… what the hell was that?”

“It’s pretty obviously why he’s upset,” Pete says, looking at me and raising his eyebrows.

“What do you mean?” I ask, confused.

“You really don’t know, do you?” Pete says sympathetically. “Why he would be so upset you slept with me?”

“Know what?” I say, completely lost.

Pete gives me a half smile, shaking his head. “Just go talk to him. You guys will work it out, like you always do” The guys all give each other a glance, leaving me feeling like I'm missing out on insider knowledge.

“Okay…whatever ” I say suspiciously, heading down the hallway. I push open the door to the back porch and walk out.

Patrick is sitting on the steps, staring down at his hands and picking at a rock in his hand. I plop down next to him, playfully jostling him with my knee.

He sighs “What do you want YN”

“Pat seriously? Why are you so mad about this?” I say

“I’m not mad, I just…” he trails off. He chucks the rock into the yard.

“Is this all really because I slept with one of your friends? I really didn’t think it would be such a big deal”

“It’s not that, I’m sorry I overreacted. It’s just…” he trails off again, standing and rubbing his hands on his legs. “Nothing, let’s forget it”

I grab his hand to stop him from walking away. “Patrick, please, sit back down”

He does, looking over at me.

“What is it?”

He shakes his head.

“Come on it’s me, you know you can tell me anything. What’s bothering you?” I squeeze his arm..

He gives a heavy sigh, like a weight is lifting off his shoulders. “ You’ve just always been my best friend, on my side. Long before you met Pete”

“Yeah….”

“So I thought you were the one person that I would never have to worry about.” he says it quietly, and I still don’t follow.

“What do you mean?”

“I thought you were the one person that would never pick him over me.” he says it, and I feel my heart break in half at the sound of it.

“Patrick…” I say, trying to get him to look at me.

“Nevermind YN, it’s not a big deal. I just wish you would have told me, that’s all” he responds, slowly getting to his feet.

“No Patrick, don’t” I say, standing and grabbing his arm. “It’s not like that. I didn’t choose him over you. In fact I would never choose anyone over you”

He looks at me now, but I can tell he doesn’t believe me. “Then why wouldn’t you just tell me?”

“I don’t know… I didn’t want you to think that Pete was anything more than a friend to me, because that’s all he is. A friend.”

“If you want more than that, I won’t hold you back” he practically whispers, turning to move away.

“Patrick, stop trying to walk away from this! From me!” I say, pulling his arm back.

“It’s fine YN, you’re right, I have no right to tell you what to do. And it was wrong of me to treat you like I should have a say”

“That’s true, and I appreciate you apologizing,” I say sincerely. “But there;s something you should know”

“You didn’t sleep with my brother too did you?”

I gasp, looking up in shock, until I catch the smile on his face and the twinkle in his eye.

“Shut up I’m trying to be serious” I scold, although secretly relieved to hear humor back in his voice.

“I’m sorry. Seriously, I overreacted, let’s just move on” Patrick says, reaching out and squeezing my arm.

“But Patrick I really need you to believe me when I say this” I take a deep breath. He looks at me, but I can’t read the expression in his eyes.

“I would never choose anyone over you. You’re my best friend. My person. And I love you”

Patrick smiles at me “I know. I love you too. Come on, let’s go back inside.”

He tries to pull me along but I don’t move, and he looks at me for a moment in confusion.

“Patrick…” I say quietly.

“What is it?”

“I don’t mean I love you as a friend, I mean I do but…” I trail off for a second. I see Patrick’s eyes widen, and I know there’s no going back.

“Patrick,” I say, taking a deep breath, “ I mean, I would never choose anyone over you, because i’m in love with you”

I see Patrick’s eyes widen, and his eyebrows raise, but for a second he says nothing and I feel like the floor is falling out underneath my feet and my heart is in free fall.

Then he smiles, and his hand comes up to the side of my face. “Really?” he asks in a whisper.

I nod, smiling in return.

His face breaks out into a grin, and the hand on the side of my face slips around my neck and pulls my lips into his. His other hand wraps around my waist, bringing me in close as I slide my hand to the back of his head and kiss him like I’ve always wanted to.

#patrick stump #patrick stump x reader #fall out boy imagine #fall out boy #patrick stump fluff

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even-after-a-millennia · 3 years

Text

Ending on Canvas

Fic for @nilefreemanweek2021 and the prompt Art! Nile thinks about Jay and Dizzy while sketching. Joe helps distract her and she finally says goodbye. You can read it below or over on my ao3 account here. Gen | Rated G | 1.4k

The safehouse was quiet. Andy and Quynh had left for a hike earlier that morning and hadn’t returned yet. Nicky was reading at the dining table, occasionally flipping his page. Booker was napping in one of the bedrooms, though if Nile concentrated enough she could hear his faint snores.

She and Joe both had their sketchbooks out and were drawing separately on the couch. Some day, they would challenge each other to recreate portraits or scenes and see how their art styles differed, but today, they were both in their own worlds.

Nile hadn’t had a plan when she had sat down, but she found herself pulling out her phone and flipping through the pictures until she found the one that she wanted to recreate. Now, it was slowly coming together, the features of her former friends becoming clearer as she worked.

Finally, she finished drawing the picture of Dizzy, Jay, and her posing for the camera.

And sat there, staring at it. At them.

She didn’t realize that she had started rocking in place, trying to expel the emotions she was feeling, until she felt Joe’s hand on her shoulder and stilled.

“Nile? Are you alright?” he asked softly.

It shouldn’t be so hard to shake her head, to tell him she wasn’t, this was Joe after all, but it felt like all the muscles in her neck were rebelling against her as she forced them to move.

“What is it, little river?” he asked.

She watched as his eyes fell on her drawing. He picked it up and examined it, his eyes taking in the scene.

“Former sisters in arms?” he gently prodded.

“Yeah,” she said, her voice raspy. “That’s Jay,” she said, pointing to her. “And that’s- that’s Dizzy.”

“You look as if you were close,” he said.

She nodded.

“They were my best friends while I served,” she admitted. Every word felt like barbed wire being pulled out of her, barbs digging in as they went.

“You don’t have to tell me, if you don’t wish to,” Joe said.

Nile smiled, a sad, small thing. “I know. I think I want to though.”

Joe nodded, settling in. Out of the corner of her eye, Nile saw Nicky close his book.

She took a deep breath, then let it out. “Women in the service are always together, on base and on assignments. That can lead to some interesting dynamics. But I was lucky when I found them. Jay was a year older than me, showed me the ropes. Dizzy… Dizzy was there. My first death.”

Joe shifted closer to her, but didn’t reach out. She huffed then grabbed hold of his hand. He squeezed it, then nodded.

“We got a lead that a man who had been responsible for the deaths of soldiers as well as civilians was holed up in a village near our base. He was using women as a living shield. We were tasked to talk to the women and engage if we found him. We did,” Nile said simply.

She could still remember the moment that Jay had kicked the door in, when Nile had entered and instinctually shot the man when she saw his gun. Two taps, right to the chest. It wasn’t even until afterward that she had realized what she had done.

“I tried to save him. But he didn’t want me to. Dizzy got distracted and he- he had a knife and,” Nile broke off, holding Joe’s hand so hard it probably hurt.

“We saw,” he murmured. “We felt it.”

It was almost a relief, to not have to describe what came next out loud. That they understood.

She nodded.

“After, when I came back, Dizzy didn’t want to be around me. She had held my throat together. Probably left a lasting impression,” Nile said, making a face. “It still hurt, though. They all turned away from me.”

Her eyes fell to her drawing.

To her friends.

“Even Jay.”

“Were you two…?” Joe trailed off, leaving the question open.

Nile shrugged. “Like I said, interesting dynamics.”

“Ah.”

They sat there, still holding hands, though their grip was much looser than before.

“I have an idea,” Joe said slowly. “But I want to check that it is something that would be good for you right now.”

“Kay. What is it?” Nile asked.

He explained his plan and Nile found herself grinning despite herself.

“Hell yes,” she said. “I’ve always wanted to do that. I loved Princess Diaries.”

Joe looked momentarily confused, but rallied. “Nicolò!” he called, as if his husband wasn’t already paying attention. “We need to go to the store!”

Nicky got up without a word and came back with their car keys.

They ended up at the dollar store, throwing supplies into the cart with abandon. Nile threw in some chocolate for good measure, enough that there would be some left for Andy. She bounced on the balls of her feet at the check out and Nicky and Joe smiled at her enthusiasm.

It took a while to set up in the backyard of their safe house, but once the tarp, canvas, and balloons filled with paint were in place, Joe turned to Nicky.

“Just one thing left,” he said with a smile.

“One moment,” Nicky said, going back into the house but not before he sent a smile back.

He emerged soon after with his arms full of a box. It was only when he set it down on the grass before Nile did she realize that it was full of knives. Not kitchen knives, either.

“Oh ho ho ho, this is going to be fun,” she said, reaching in and grabbing a throwing knife.

“Need a tutorial on throwing these?” Joe asked.

Nile pinched the tip of her knife, hefted her arm beside her head with her other arm extending before her, and then pitched forward, the blade spinning through the air until it sunk into a balloon and its paint began to drip down the canvas.

“Impressive,” Nicky said, his eyes twinkling.

Nile shrugged. “Something I picked up.”

Joe gestured to the canvas. “It’s all yours.”

“Nah, I want your guys’ help with this,” she said, handing them knives of their own. “And I wanna see who is the better shot,” she said, teasing.

“You first, my love,” Nicky said.

Joe sent him a look that made him snort, then his knife was spinning through the air and blue paint exploded across the canvas.

Nile gave a little cheer.

Nicky stepped forward and threw his as well. His knife hit the balloon next to Joe’s nestling into the canvas side by side. Nile huffed at the look of unabashed love that Joe gave Nicky and the smile Nicky gave him in return. Then they focused, and took turns throwing.

They had only put purples, blues, and black in the balloons, and soon, the canvas was covered in color and they had no more balloons to pop.

Going to the canvas, Nile smeared the colors together a bit more in places, more to make sure the canvas wasn’t showing any more.

“It will be a bit of time until it dries,” Joe said, looking over her shoulder.

Nile nodded. “That’s okay. I have an idea for once it does, if you don’t mind me taking it over.”

Joe lifted his hands, acquiescing. “This was for you, Nile. Do with it what you wish.”

She smiled and didn’t even have to put effort into it. “Thanks, Joe. Both of you,” she said, looking over at Nicky.

He shook his head. “This was all Joe’s idea. But I am glad that it helped.”

“Where is everybody?” Nile heard Quynh’s voice say from inside the house.

“Out here!” she called.

Andy and Quynh emerged into the backyard and took in the artistic carnage there. Andy started laughing.

“I’m almost sorry I missed whatever the fuck this was,” she said.

Quynh entwined their hands. “Almost,” she agreed.

They cleaned up, Nile taking the canvas inside to dry.

It did take a while to dry with all the paint on it, but once it did, she sat in front of it with a paint brush and white paint.

Slowly, she turned the multitude of colors into an alive night sky, complete with stars shining.

Her final touch was to add three figures to the bottom, etched out in white against the black that had spilled there. No prominent details, but they stood there together, looking up at the sky awash with color.

It was the best ending she could give to her two friends and the woman they used to know.

#nile freeman #nileweek2021 #the old guard #fanfic #my fic #nile and joe being art bros

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hauntedfalcon · 3 years

Text

living in midnight

for day four of Nile Freeman Week: "Nile & Struggle" plus a fantasy AU in which superheroes exist, Nile isn't one of them, and she doesn't let that stop her. 1700 words, rated M for swearing. content warning for wounds and needles because it's Nile's turn for sapphic patching up, as a treat

the title is from Lianne La Havas’s “Midnight”. many thanks to @flightsofwonder for beta reading <3

read on AO3 or below

Nile opens her eyes to see an unfamiliar ceiling. There is an unfamiliar pillow under her head, and she is recumbent on an unfamiliar sofa. Above it is a window, where streetlights reflect in the sinuous trails of raindrops.

Rain. Knives. Three attackers. She fought like hell, might have broken someone’s arm, but they landed one good hit. They left her for dead in an alley. She watched her own blood run into a puddle.

She bolts upright--and hisses when a wave of agony breaks over her, starting in her abdomen and shooting everywhere.

“Please don’t move,” says a softly accented voice. “You’re safe here. I haven’t seen your face.”

Nile collapses back down to the pillow and touches her face, just to be sure. Her mask is still in place. She drops her hand and forces one eye open, blurry with pained tears, to get a look at whoever dragged her in from the alley.

A white woman. Dark shoulder-length hair. Youngish, maybe Nile’s age. Dressed all in black, much like her--not for stealth but for soft goth vibes. Cute, if she’s honest, but this isn’t the fucking singles bar, get it together Freeman.

“I staunched the bleeding,” her rescuer says, “but I was waiting until you were conscious to do the stitches.”

“Do we have to?” Nile groans before she can stop herself.

A blink-and-you’ll-miss-it smile. “I’m afraid so. Would you like some fortitude?” The amateur surgeon holds out a bottle of Everclear.

Ugh. Nile takes the cap off and drinks deep, leaving enough in the bottle to sterilize whatever needs to be sterilized. It tastes like ass and lingers at the back of her throat.

Before the alcohol can set in and obliterate her senses, she says, “Can I borrow your phone?”

The woman hesitates. Very wise of her.

“Listen,” Nile says. “We had two leads come in at the same time. Al-Tayyib took one and I took the other, and mine was a decoy, which means...” She can’t, won’t, say it aloud. She hates how feeble she sounds. “I just have to check in with him. Please.”

The woman hands her a smartphone, unlocked. Nile hits the keycode to make the call anonymous, then dials Joe’s shitty flip phone from memory. He keeps it on silent when he’s on the rounds, and he’ll only answer if he’s safe.

Pick up, she wills him, because if she has to hear his stupid cheerful voicemail greeting now of all times, she’s going to scream right in front of this poor woman who didn’t ask for any of this drama in her life. Pick up, pick up, pick--

“Pronto.”

Nile’s gut tightens (painfully, but that’s not what matters right now) at the sound of another unfamiliar voice. The assassin. Joe walked into a trap.

“Where is he?” she demands, trying to sound hard and not like she’s lying on a stranger’s couch with an open wound.

A gust in the speaker. Is he laughing at her? She strains to hear anything that would give away their location: traffic, a clock tower, machinery, anything. There’s nothing else. No hint of Joe yelling in the background, either.

“I will return him to you presently,” says the asshole. Very formal.

“What, after you shank him like your goons did to me?”

“They were instructed not to kill you,” he says in a voice that wouldn’t fog a window in January. “Did you die?”

White-hot rage flares out of her with no place to go. “Where is he, you son of a--” But he has already hung up on her.

Nile resists the urge to growl. If this was her phone she would throw it against the wall. Instead she quickly deletes the record of the outgoing call, and hands the phone back to the woman, who pockets it. “Thank you,” she says tightly.

“I’m sorry to say so,” says the woman as she holds the tip of a curved needle in a candle flame, “but you are in no condition to save anyone right now.”

She blows out a sigh in answer. When she pulls the hem of her shirt up and peels away the medical tape and bandage pad, she discovers that the woman is absolutely right. This isn’t the worst Nile has been hurt and still fought, but it is pretty bad.

And it’s one thing to trash a gang of traffickers while she’s actively bleeding. It’s something totally different to track down a guy who has been three steps ahead of them this whole time, and seems to have removed his sense of morals with an ice cream scoop.

There’s only one thing left to do: say a silent prayer. The way she learned to pray feels insufficiently casual for the circumstances; she wishes she knew more about the format of the rakat. All she remembers is, “God hears the one who praises him,” so she starts on the Lord’s Prayer because praise comes before petition.

In place of, “Give us this day our daily bread,” she substitutes, “Get Joe out of this with his head,” and then she has to hold back a giggle at the rhyme. She must have lost a lot of blood.

The woman wipes the needle down with Everclear. “You know, I met the old Guardian too.”

Nile eyes her carefully. She won’t say Andy’s name in this woman’s presence. She won’t say Joe’s name either, much less her own. She won’t slip no matter how much blood she’s lost or how strong the alcohol is or how fundamentally good and trustworthy this woman seems or how much this is going to hurt. “Not under the same conditions,” she presumes.

“Very similar,” the woman says with another fleeting smile. “I hope she’s well?”

“She’s good,” Nile hastens to reassure her. “She retired.” And she left Nile her nom de guerre and all the weight that went with it.

“I’m glad she made it that long.”

“Probably thanks to you,” Nile says, and she gets a longer smile for it.

Then the needle bites into her skin and Nile whimpers softly and throws an arm over her eyes. She’s hard. She’s tough. This is what she does.

The woman’s gloved hand pinches the wound closed as she stitches. She works quickly, professionally. “I’m really glad you found me,” Nile manages. “I can’t exactly go to a hospital.”

“I think you would be surprised,” the woman says. “You are well loved in this city. People would protect your identity.”

That’s not it. Nile can’t go to hospital because there’s a chance her mom would be on shift, and the only thing worse than keeping her alter ego secret from her mom is the idea that she would find out because Nile came in on a gurney. She can’t do that to her.

A tug, as she ties the thread off, and then a snip of the shears. Nile lifts her head and looks down at a slightly puckered, neatly stitched, no longer bleeding knife wound.

Her laugh sounds brittle, just this side of hysterical. The woman glances at her. “I have work tomorrow,” Nile says weakly.

The woman tapes a fresh bandage over the wound. “Me too.”

No rest for the righteous. “The struggle is real, huh? Sorry for keeping you up late.”

“I will call in if you do,” the woman offers.

But going into the office in the morning might be the soonest opportunity to make sure Joe is okay. Nile pulls her shirt down and zips her bomber jacket over it. “I should go.”

The woman sets one hand on Nile’s arm. “Please stay. You shouldn’t be out alone tonight.”

“They might have been watching when you brought me inside,” Nile warns.

“Then I will need your protection, won’t I?” the woman says without blinking, as if she’s not the one that just saved Nile’s whole life.

Nile cracks an incredulous smile but the woman just gazes at her solemnly.

“Okay,” she says at last. “Okay, I’ll stay. Thank you. And I’m sorry for bleeding on your couch.”

It’s not enough, but the woman just sets about cleaning up her supplies. Nile settles back against the pillow and wills her muscles to unclench.

“May I ask,” the woman asks as she washes her hands, “why you do this? You don’t have superpowers.”

No, and none of the people who do have taken this city under their protection. Flippant, lazy answers parade through Nile’s mind, because she’s not in a charitable mood. Anger issues. No one else is gonna do it. I’m a giant masochist, actually.

But when she opens her mouth, the first thing that comes out is Andy’s answer, from when Nile asked her years ago. “Because there are people worth fighting for.”

Then Joe’s answer: “People who won’t get justice any other way.”

And, finally, one that’s all hers. “I have a responsibility. This is my city”

She’s going to pass out any minute, but beneath her fatigue there’s still a live coal of the feelings that made her put this mask on in the first place. This is her damn city. She spends so much time in the guts of its shitty justice system, and the rest of the time punching assholes, that she sometimes forgets her city is full of ordinary, decent people. Good people. People who will bring someone in from the rain. People like…

“What’s your name?” Nile asks, and then catches herself. “I can’t--give you mine. Sorry. It might be safer if I don’t know yours.”

“Celeste,” says the woman.

Good people like Celeste. How comforting that is.

Her pain is down to an ache instead of a burn, and her eyes drift closed. In the morning, she’ll be out of Celeste’s hair. She’ll shower at her apartment, carefully, and she’ll go into Legal Aid, and Joe will be there, a little banged up but alive. He’ll hug her, quick and tight, and they’ll loiter by the coffee maker and speak in low voices and sort out their next play. And when the work day is over, they’ll go with Andy and Quỳnh down to Booker’s for drinks and darts, and Nile will order a bouquet of flowers sent to Celeste’s apartment in thanks. Everything, for given quantities of everything, will be fine.

Confident in her safety, secure in her purpose, Nile rests.

#The Old Guard #Nile Freeman #nileweek2021

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wickedpact · 3 years

Text

A ranking of all the TTT stories in order of how much I liked them.

(Oh god this is so long)

1 My Mother's Axe

BABY ANDYYYYYYYYYYYY. Honestly this one had the trifecta of developing a character's motivations, developing a character's backstory, & developing their personality. The story starting out with Andy teaching Nile to use the axe was so charming and fun, and you could feel that chemistry they had in Opening Fire, the way they teased and bickered with each other so naturally. I loved the wedge between them on the subject of the axe, how Nile was perhaps a little too young to understand Andy's feelings about whether or not its the 'same' axe. I also love how the axe is obviously the symbol of the franchise and hugely important, but you never get a sense of exactly how important it is to Andy until you read the story.

I love the entire Ship of Theseus theme, and how it feels so natural that for Andy she has to get attached to the idea of things rather than the things themselves because she'll always outlive the things themselves-- the axe is symbolically her mom's axe, even if physically it isn't. And I love how she clearly clings to that concept so tightly. "This is the labrys she held in her hands...." IT GETS ME.

And the fact that this sense of BELONGING, of FAMILY, of CULTURE is so important to Andy that she clings to it (figuratively and literally) with both hands. And of course it's important to her, she spent so long alone that the woman doesn't even remember her birth name. That axe (or the idea of that axe) is all she has left of her mother and that family/culture she was born into.

PLUS on that note I love how Andy doesn't remember if her mom was her actual biological mother, but it doesn't matter to her. This woman was her mother in all the ways that counted. And how her mom BETRAYED AND KILLED Andy but Andy loved her so much that she avenged her and carried her axe for thousands of years. THOUSANDS OF YEARS!!!!!!

I also loved how the story transcends the timeline of the whole franchise and seeing Andy through the years. Loved seeing her with the varying squads and with varying axes. Also baby Andy was so cute. It was cool seeing her so young. like holy fuck. Andromache The Scythian, Immortal Warrior (but smol). Love that.

Also I think this one is one of the few ttt stories that doesn't suffer from length problems.

tldr: goddammit greg you've done it again.

2 Zanzibar and Other Harbors

Zanzibar my beloved. I've said before, but it's downright comedic how little regard there was for Joe and Nicky's character designs in this story. The same person who does the colors for the regular comic did the colors for this one too, and you can tell, every panel of this story was Beautiful.

Ik there was A Lot of criticism of this one (lmao @ how the fandom had no idea what was to come) but I thought a lot of The Discourse was a bit dramatic. I did think Nicky came off as a little oblivious to Joe's feelings in this story, but I've said before, I honestly think that was a 'tone not translating' thing. It felt like Nicky was nagging Joe for [checks notes] saving innocent people, but Joe was so amused by Nicky's complaints I really do think it was supposed to come off as teasing.

Plus I know the 'Joe running off into danger and Nicky reluctantly following' dynamic wasn't popular (I'm a pretty meh on it meself) but I did love how Joe's impulsiveness (if you want to call it that) was interpreted as heroism and not hot-hotheadedness. All of the examples Nicky and Joe talked about included Joe explicitly saving people. (and it also took A Lot for the nazi to actually provoke Joe).

I also feel like their characterization here was closest to the movie canon-- the bit where they hear the woman scream and Joe goes running in to save her while Nicky swoops in on Joe's heels to comfort her while Joe and the nazi were fighting reminds me of the train car scene. Joe had suggested First that they go find Nile because she needed to be protected, and Nicky later added that Nile probably also needed emotional support. Similar reactions.

But it was So Good, the themes of queer community and the enduring nature of queer culture are Not themes you see in media that often and it was such a delight how it was done. Also it's one of the few more modern TTT stories that has a completely valid excuse for taking place when it did. Chef's kiss.

3 Passchendaele

I love the Duality between seeing baby Andy and then seeing Mama Andy in the very next issue. This story doesn't have a ton of meat to it, but the entire concept of Andy adopting a war orphan straight off the battlefield PLUCKS MY TENDER LITTLE HEARTSTRINGS, and I think it's especially poignant for comic!Andy. I think most people wouldn't think twice about movie!Andy doing something like that but comic Andy is so hardened and almost cruel sometimes, and seeing that even for her the world hasn't beaten all of the compassion from her yet is SO!!!!!!! this woman contains MULTITUDES okay, she's violent and angry and tired and Done but she's also so kind and compassionate and THE STRENGTH OF HER!!!!! Also the idea of her and Yitzhak co-raising a kid together is so damn cute. It was #mysterious pre-Yitzhak-story but now it's cute. holy fuck. It's cute.

& the headbonk panel of her and Zeus lives in my heart. anyways.

4 Many Happy Returns

I Know people weren't thrilled about Booker being in this one, but I've developed a pet-peeve about that: this story was *not* booker-centric. Booker only exists in this story to the extent required to explain the importance of the gesture Nile makes towards him. If there was a story about Booker making some grand gesture of kindness to Nile no one would be saying it was Nile-centric. bc it wouldn't be! Booker exists in this story to explore Nile's kindness, its not about him. I saw that a couple times and it bothered me. anyways.

AAAAAAAAAA I loved this one, the art was beautiful, I loved how Andy Nile and Booker were drawn (like their comic selves but.. more looking like actual people). I loved Andy and Nile's Bants, how Andy wanted to jump right in and Do Violence but Nile was basically telling her to hold her horses.

I feel like I'm just repeating the post I made on this story a few days ago, but I LOVED how Nile's plan revolves not around violence or Cool Mercenary Skills but on Nile's own life skills (as she canonly did a lot of minimum wage job-hopping before the marines in comics canon). Her plan used her skills, not the skills of an immortal warrior, and HER SKILLS were in fact more useful for the situation! lov to see Nile's resourcefulness and planning skills.

AND HOW NILE WAS PROBABLY WATCHING BOOKER??? it's so Much bc 1.) nile knew booker A SINGLE DAY and yet he made such an impression on her emotionally that she had to keep an eye on him and 2.) she said in the movie she wanted Booker to get off free with an apology. Yes she's a member of the team but that doesn't mean she's necessarily going to follow orders like a good little soldier. I also love how she convinced Andy to go along with it. her HEART, her KINDNESS, her THOUGHTFULNESS, UGH.

5 The Bear

Honestly I have like no negative things to say about this one other than a.) character design issues which is less about the story itself and is more of a 'tog comic in general' criticism and b.) too short, but it was supposed to be a tease, so.

But I loved Yitzhak, I wasn't expecting to really like him at all but like I said in my other post, he tickled me. I love characters who are Kind™, especially if they have little reason to be so given their backgrounds. Chef's kiss. Lov him.

6 Bonsai Shokunin

I know this one was a little controversial bc of the outsider POV but whenever I see people upset about that they never point out that the Outsider Guy (the samurai) existed as a reflection on Noriko. His ideas are explained in the text to develop hers. The whole story follows how she gave mercy to a scared young man and in response he murdered Noriko, repeatedly! Who gave him the right to inflict such pain and suffering on the world? In his opinion, the lack of response from the gods was his permission. And for Noriko-- over and over again she dies and suffers because she gave mercy, which lines up with her ideas in FM about how it's their fate to rule mortals and if they don't align with that plan/fate/whatever then they suffer. It shows some background to those ideas and how they developed in her mind outside of Ocean Madness™. Additionally, his idea of 'the Gods have done nothing to strike me down so it's fine if I do these things' kind of explains how Noriko may justify her own morally corrupt actions-- she's died so many times and it's never stuck. Maybe if she did die any of those times, or while she was in the water, maybe that would've been a sign she was doing something right, or at least doing something normal. But she hasn't died. Fate isn't done with Noriko yet. And maybe there's a reason for that. In her mind, it's just not a very pleasant reason, is all.

There were things I was kind of meh about tho. I did kind of wish we saw something of Noriko and the team, or smth explaining the way she was before her dip in the pool-- personality, likes dislikes, etc. but it wasn't bad or anything. It was super vague tho, I had to read it a few times before I got what it was going for. Liked the art. Liked the bonsai metaphor. And of course I Respect the decision to use the 1300s (1200s? I don't remember off the top of my head) rather than using the last 200 years.

7 Strong Medicine

Honestly looking back, this one made me kind of sad because both this one and Bonsai Shokunin explored character's ideas on Fate and The Divine and how that intersects with immortality and I totally thought that theme would be continued, especially with Love Letters. But Then It Wasn't™.

Admittedly.... I had to re-read this one to remember most of it. I liked Booker's ideas on God, 'The conductor of the symphony just may not be very good at his trade' but the plot itself was kind of forgettable. Some fuckin cowboys try to kill a doctor (their second) because he couldn't save their sickly brother. Book tries to stop them, gets killed, and then comes back and kills them all before they get the doctor. Alright. I liked the artstyle because the characters were ugly in a similar way that leandro's are, but way more bearable.

I love the Irony of Booker concluding that there is no such thing as fate or destiny and nothing has meaning, AS HE UNKNOWINGLY SAVES MERRICK'S GRANDFATHER FROM BEING KILLED. Booker getting fucked over by life/god/destiny yet again. It also kind of explains about where the fuck hell Merrick's interest in immortal mercenaries even came from.

I originally had this one a lot higher and then I thought about it and moved it down like two spots.

8 Never Gets Old

I liked seeing Booker interact with his kid. And we got a name for the kid! Philippe was a little bitch though, he was a little obnoxious. I liked how Booker was so thrilled to experience a restaurant with his kid (and since we know he was there before, it can be assumed he went with all of his kids and yet he was so charmed each time). It fits with his line to Nicky in the moon landing story about how you don't appreciate beautiful things 'unless you have someone to share them with'. It was charming to see Booker interact with his kid, and to see him so happy. Also lmao @ Booker's big fat Ye Olde Crush on Andy.

However at the same time it was like.. of all the things to write about,,, I guess? Booker's Night Out...... alright. Especially since Book had so many stories.

I don't know, it was alright. The old man killing him really came out of nowhere, (but the 'Salut, asshole!' panel was funny tho).

9 How To Make a Ghost Town

I've hit a point where talking about these stories has gotten less fun. I liked this one but I felt like Achilles getting lynched was not really necessary for a story that was already tragic (a story that already involved Achilles doing a lot of suffering at the hand of bigots). When we first got the blurb for this story I thought it would be about Andy returning to the squad and making friends with Booker after losing Achilles and them butting heads on the idea of family and when to cut off ties. So a little bit of my underwhelmedness about this one might be just my expectations being different.

Honestly I was pretty interested in Andy and Achilles' relationship and I would've liked to see more of them-- like, what was their dynamic like? What did they love about each other?

But anyways Andy leaving and Achilles getting killed anyways feels so pointlessly tragic (which I suppose is the point..... I don't like tragedies) she left to save him and yet people killed him anyway. Meh.

I did love the bits about Andy wanting to have a domestic life (Andy and her multitudes again) and the little detail about how she buried her axe near the road but he buried his guns under his bed-- he was an escaped slave, he never had the luxury of assuredness like Andy did. It was a sad story.

10 Lacus Solitudinis

'You put this one above love letters crim??? how could you???' easy, lmao.

There was stuff in this one I liked. But to talk about stuff I didn't like: (I'll keep it brief, I know ragging on this story has been done time and time again)

UH, setting aside the 6 year cold shoulder between Joe and Nicky, I thought their chosen method of conflict resolution was... bad at best. Nicky's inability to talk about his feelings was also annoying, especially since the entire point of this story is a fight Joe and Nicky had, and yet we don't get both sides to the story, which is...... important? That fact is especially annoying bc in the absence of Nicky explaining his side of the story, it's absolutely a possible (and admittedly probably unintentional) interpretation of the text that we do get that Joe routinely resolves conflict between him and Nicky by simply cutting Nicky out of his life entirely until Nicky just. caves? Even if it takes years?

WHICH i could get into that interpretation and how fucked up i find it. but im not going to. out of restraint.

I don't know, I think there are a lot of interesting ways to go about this conflict but 'Nicky wants to kill a guy and Joe refuses to acknowledge his existence until he stops because he thinks Nicky is too much of a Good Boy to get his hands dirty like that' ('I wont watch as the world turns his (...) compassion into something ugly'. ) wasn't.. how I would've done it. (I mean you know Joe doesn't give a shit about what Nicky is doing in a moral way, because Joe doesn't even care or mention that Booker is killing those cops too. Joe only cares because he doesn't like the idea of Nicky changing in a way he finds undesirable.)

admittedly I've said before, I do like the emphasis Joe's reaction puts on Nicky's kindness. Joe has a complete inability to cope with Nicky simply Not Being Kind. It speaks to the steadiness of Nicky's compassion all those years. but still that fact doesn't make it the conflict feel worth it

hm. I said I would be brief and I wasn't.

oh well. basically I thought there was interesting conflict potential there but it wasn't done the way I would've liked, and the way it was done leaves a lot of disturbing (and again probably unintended) interpretations to lie.

What I did like? Andy and Joe having that pessimist/optimist dynamic. Joe nerding out about science. Andy not being impressed by The Achievements Of Man. I loved Booker needling at Nicky about his outdated slang and also trying to give him Older Brother advice practically in the same breath. I loved Booker giving The Worst relationship advice ever and Nicky being like 'I Will Not Do That, Ever, Thanks.' the family vibes were so good. The Joenicky vibes left a lot to be desired tho.

11 Love Letters

I talked about my problems with Nicky in this story (and Lacus Solitudinis). I don't know, the story isn't bad but I do hold a little bit of a grudge towards it because its very existence begs the existence of a solo Joe story and we didn't get one. If we never got this story, then we could happily count Lacus Solitudinis and Zanzibar as The Joenicky Stories™ and move on with our lives. sigh.

I remember when we first got the blurb for this story I was really curious about why Nicky specifically + the setting, and the answer kind of feels like 'the author had an idea for a story like this and saw ttt as a good enough place to utilize that idea'. Plus I was really underwhelmed by the Romantic Sentiment in the letter. If you look at it line-by-line, the majority of the letter is actually Nicky talking about how lonely and disturbed he is, rather than actual,, yknow,,, Romantic Sentiment. I mean, compare the van speech and this letter and this letter is just kind of meh in comparison. I liked nicky calling joe wise! and I liked the brief sun/moon metaphor! and otherwise it was eh. It didn't even have cute squad banter, which is why Lacus Solitudinis is above this one.

12 An Old Soul

Nun orgy. Nun orgy?????? Nun orgy.......

The whole story felt like a setup to have a nun orgy. Why did Booker have abs? Why did they do that to Andy's nose? ?????? the art was good at least.

nun orgy.

#tales through time spoilers #obviously #long post #seriously dont open that read more unless youre committed to scrolling past all these Words

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kill-your-authors · 3 years

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I’ve been thinking about Booker again.

I know I’ve talked about my opinions on him before (and gotten hate for doing so) but I literally can’t let it go so here I am talking about it again.

I have a problem with how Booker’s character arc was handled in the movie. I whole-heartedly believe that the intention was for the audience to feel torn at the ending of the movie, after finding out that Booker betrayed them and that he was going to face a hundred years of exile and as an audience member I want to feel torn. I want to be asking myself, “But if I were in his shoes, can I honestly say I wouldn’t have done the same?” because writing that evokes that kind of emotion in the audience is exciting and it’s what fiction is for.

But we’re not torn at the end. I think everyone who watched the movie and is currently in this fandom has taken a definitive “side” when there was never supposed to be sides. People either over-sympathize with Booker and have either forgiven him or outright excused him for the harm he did, or they have vilified him and think he deserved worse, or that he ought to never be forgiven.

And as it stands, as the movie was written, I lean toward the side that believes, at the very least, he had it coming and deserves what he got.

But I wish that wasn’t the case. I wish the movie had done a better job of revealing Booker’s POV of things. Firstly, that he had no idea they were going to be captured. He believed they were going to give up some DNA, some tissue samples, and believed in doing so, that millions of sick people would either become healthy, or that their quality of life would be vastly improved and as a bonus in the process they would discover a way for him to end his life. In his eyes, that was nothing less than a win-win, and one I could easily see the youngest and least experienced and most naïve member of The Guard believing was the right thing to do.

Nile wasn’t part of his plan, Andy losing her immortality wasn’t part of his plan, Nicky and Joe being tortured wasn’t part of his plan. It wasn’t even part of Copley’s, so how could it have been part of Booker’s? Not only that, but Booker isn’t doing this just for himself. Booker gets called selfish a lot by this fandom, and gets called selfish in canon by Joe - but Booker really believed he was doing this for Andy too. He probably believed he was making the decision that Andy, the leader of their group, would never make because Andy knows she is the one the rest of them look up to to be strong and to cope with their immortality and to lead them on their righteous path of doing good and making the world a better place.

And I know I’ve made this argument before (and gotten hate for it) but I really think they fucked up when they had Booker say in the lab, “What do you know of the weight of all these years alone? You and Nicky always had each other.” I hate this line, because there is no way to interpret it other than that Booker did this because he’s lonely and not just lonely but romantically lonely which is indisputably selfish even if you consider that he’s doing it for Andy too, who had Quynh in her life for longer than Joe and Nicky have had each other, and who has had to live without her for 500 years.

I really wish that at this critical point in the plot, they had Booker bring up his kids. He is the only one (that we know of) out of the entire guard who had children and we know that his grief over losing them is what has driven him to the point of being suicidal because of his conversation with Nile by the campfire. Booker’s backstory is a tragedy. Not only did he watch all three of his children die (and presumably a wife) but they all despised him, and more importantly despised him for his immortality. They blamed him for their deaths. They are the real reason he is so desperate to “end it,” and yet they made it sound like the only reason he doesn’t want to live is because he doesn’t have a romantic partner which in comparison, is nothing and is indisputably a selfish and pathetic (as Joe points out) reason for him to expose the Guard’s immortality to outsiders.

I also think they should have done this because unlike Andy, Joe and Nicky, who all have lost people too, and had to grieve people too - Booker’s memory of his family is fresh. Their loss is still an open wound. Andy says herself that she can’t remember her mother or sisters’ faces. Andy, Joe and Nicky are full of grief too, but their wounds aren’t fresh.

(I also think this would have been good to highlight because it also explains why Nile was willing to let him off with an apology. I hate the implication that Nile wants to let him off with an apology because she hasn’t “learned” yet the way they suggest. I don’t think they’re giving Nile enough credit. Nile has just learned that she will never even speak to her mom and brother again, people she didn’t even get to say goodbye to. She has also just left all of her closest friends behind and the military, which was a vocation that was incredibly important to her due to her dad and she has just listened to Booker explain the toll this will take on her as time passes. When she suggests they let him off with an apology, it’s because she understands more than anybody else in that moment what the grief of losing your family can drive you to do. I know it is also because she is young, and has a good heart, and isn’t the type to hold a grudge, but to act as if that’s the only reason is just not giving Nile enough credit. She’s a marine who less than a week before believed that death was the end of it and here they all are now, alive and safe again, and she’s thinking, “No harm, no foul.”)

And also, Booker is like Nile. He’s “too new” still. Unlike Andy, Joe and Nicky who believe there’s at least a chance every time they die that they’re dying for real, Booker knows he’s got time. He knows he’s got centuries, maybe even millennia to endure yet. Millennia of wanting desperately to die and not being able to ahead of him. As someone who has been suicidal (and I know this makes me biased), who has believed the alternative to death was decades (not even centuries, let alone millennia!) of misery still ahead of me - I can tell you that when you’re thinking like that, death feels like such a gift, to be able to remind yourself, “at least I have the option to kill myself” when things get truly dark. Booker doesn’t have that option. He has to suffer indefinitely.

I just really wish the movie had explored this and I think it’s really unfortunate that what Booker’s going through got boiled down to being romantically lonely. I think Booker’s arc misses it’s own point and therefore the ending in which he gets exiled for 100 years defeats the purpose. We aren’t torn. We aren’t asking ourselves what we would have done in his place, and we aren’t unsure of the answer anyway. For me, this was a make-or-break missed opportunity for this movie. It’s still one of my favorite movies, and these characters are very close to my heart now, but as a writer it missed its mark.

#the old guard #sebastian le livre #joe x nicky #andromache of scythia #Booker #yes I know this meta has been beaten to death #but I'm still not over it

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ocegion · 3 years

Text

Nile is sitting on one of the couches of the safehouse, legs crossed and eyes on her screen as she lazily navigates youtube, when she hears an app notification loudly popping up a few feet away from her. She blinks a few times and looks up at its source.

Joe and Nicky are on the couch across from her, half-lying on each other as each of them reads their own book. Now, however, Nicky is grasping at his phone, slight grimace on his face as he looks at it, then exchanges a look with Joe, who sports a similar expression. A moment later they nod at each other and Nicky sweeps his thumb across the screen.

Their heads come together as they both focus on the screen, a certain degree of curious apprehension on their faces. They stay like that for a moment, then Nicky’s grimace comes back stronger than before as he tosses the phone to the edge of the couch. Joe just huffs, eyes narrowed, and his hand flies to Nicky’s head, gently massaging his scalp as he pulls the man closer.

It’s a few moments before either of them take notice of Nile’s fixed gaze. Joe looks curious, relaxing his hold on his partner a bit as he shifts his attention.

‘Is something the matter, Nile? You need anything?’

Nile now realizes she’s been staring, and quickly breaks her eyes away for a single moment before coming back, now with a teasing, somewhat incredulous grin on her lips.

‘I had gay friends back in Chicago, you know’ she comments easily. Nicky frowns in confusion.

‘You have gay friends now. We’re right here.’

‘I know, I know, not saying otherwise. Just… Some things are familiar.’ Neither of them seem to have a clue what she’s getting at, if their deepening frown is anything to go by. Nile’s amusement grows exponentially. ‘All I’m saying is, I know what a grindr notification sounds like.’

In the five months she’s been part of the team, Nile has barely ever seen Nicky show the slightest indication of nerves, let alone flustered. He’s about as impassible as a marble statue, but without the hard coldness to it. Now, however, she’s seeing with her own two eyes how a deep red quickly takes hold of his cheeks in the few seconds it takes for him to fully register what she’s said and hastily look down. He unconsciously leans towards Joe, who isn’t flustered, per se, but for once in his life seems to be not immediately sure what to say, mouth opening to start saying something, only to repeatedly decide to change his wording, then just shutting up with his lips turned a thin line.

‘What the hell is a green deer?’ Andy asks from the other corner of the room, where she’s taken off her headphones to pay attention to the current commotion. Nile brings her hand to her mouth to stifle a laugh when Nicky groans in response.

‘Nothing important’ Joe grumbles lowly. Andy’s eyebrow rises, an equally amused and bemused expression hinting on her face, but she merely shrugs and puts her headphones back on. Nile can hear the music from here, and she’s going to have to remind her again that no healing means she can, in fact, go deaf if she keeps doing that.

For the time being, though…

‘Grindr’ she repeats, a delighted tone to her voice. The word seems to be some sort of spell that makes the both of them shrink on themselves, and she supposes it’s a bit mean, but they have behaved like the dignified, nearly-mystic millenium-old warriors they are every moment Nile has shared with them. She’s not going to let the chance to see them embarrassed pass so quickly.

‘There’s no shame in it, you know’ she says, and she means it. But she’ll admit that she says it knowing it’ll make Joe groan softly as he hides his face in his hands, and Nicky petulantly crosses his arms while pointedly looking away. ‘I mean it! I’m not going to judge you for your… Pastimes.’

‘This isn’t- This is not-’ Nicky stutters, brighter red if it’s even possible, and Nile is going to commit that look to memory because who knows when it’s going to come back. He wildly gestures with his hands, as if trying to grasp the words.

‘We were just curious, is all’ Joe supplies in a low but hasty mumble, nearly pouting and looking anywhere but at her. She raises her eyebrow.

‘I’d say you two are a bit late to be curious about this sort of thing. I doubt there’s anything you’ve got left to learn about this stuff. Well, being vanilla is okay in any case, even if it’s for a thousand years. Whatever suits you.’

Nicky stares at her, and opens his mouth to say something only to stop himself at the last second. He takes a long moment and in the end he settles, calmly, for ‘We were at a bar the other day, and we heard that grindr is the new space for gay men. We just wanted to check it out, keep up with the times.’

‘It wasn’t exactly what we expected it to be’ Joe adds, dryly. Nile takes a moment to stop herself from bursting into laughter. God, right now she really wishes social media wasn’t off limits to her, this is comedy gold.

She rises to her feet and throws herself at the other couch in between them. Joe and Nicky automatically make space for her, but they stretch their arms behind the couch to hold hands. They look at her curiously and she grins while she makes a beckoning gesture to Nicky.

‘Let me see.’

‘Nile!’ he nearly shrieks, half-scandalized. Nile is reminded that despite looking like he’s on the flower of life, at the point where maturity hasn’t started chipping away at youthful vigor, he is, after all, a grandpa older than most countries he steps into. Unfazed by this, she gives him a look that has him begrudgingly handling her his phone while muttering something under his breath.

Despite their complains, they seem very interested in whatever she’s going to do, both of their heads touching hers as they look at the device in her hands. She can’t help but be endeared by Nicky’s phone: His wallpaper is a pic of Joe sleeping (she’s willing to bet her next 30 lives that the opposite is true for Joe’s phone), and beside a sudoku app, the phone is pretty much barren. Except for grindr.

‘You should expect some, uh, unsavory things in there’ Joe mutters, somewhat apprehensive. Nile gives him an unimpressed look.

‘I’m not a child, Joe, no matter how many times you all say it. I’m pretty sure I’ve seen more than you had at my age.’

However, she goes directly to their profile. It’s the only thing that holds her curiosity, really, everything else has a very low chance of being anything she hasn’t already seen in her other friends’ phones. It is adorably innocent, considering what they knew about the app. It’s got a selfie of the two of them with Joe kissing Nicky’s cheek, another selfie of Joe at the beach with that backwards cap of his and sunglasses, and then a third one of Nicky reading, which she’s pretty sure Joe took while he wasn’t aware of it.

The profile is pretty much empty otherwise. The description is a mere ‘curious couple’, which, again, is adorably innocent considering she knows who they are. Not so much to anyone else, though.

Just in that moment, just as she’s about to check the chats just to drag the experience out, the phone rings with a new message. She opens it and-

‘Wow’ she says as she drops the phone, and you know what, she had forgotten the part about just how forward some guys could be. Had repressed it, most likely.

‘I know’ Nicky wails, picking up the phone and putting it at a safe distance. ‘We’ve gotten so many of those. And people who call Joe ‘daddy’. And asking about our, huh, positions. We keep expecting something a bit more… Mild. Just friendly. But no luck.’

‘We tried to start a few conversations, with some of the more, umm, dressed guys’ Joe continues, voice conveying a deep desolation within his soul. ‘It never goes over five minutes before they ask us if we want… Well. I’m not going to repeat it.’

Nile is, once more, struggling to keep the laughter inside herself. The sulky look they both give her has the laugh finally escaping her. ‘You are two attractive, young-looking men’ she says once she’s got her air back. ‘Of course guys are going to be interested. I think at this point you’ve figured out what guys are looking for in here.’

There is a brief silence. ‘Don’t get us wrong, it’s great there’s enough freedom for this… Thing, to exist’ Nicky says, more serene than he’d been a handful minutes ago. ‘It would have been unthinkable a handful decades ago in a country like this. It’s just not what we were expecting.’

‘It used to be about romance’ Joe adds, still somewhat sulky and looking at the phone like it had personally insulted him. ‘There used to be seduction, yearning, poetry. Courtship has changed a lot since we were young, we know, but this just skips it altogether. It’s lacking in taste, is all.’

Nile could repeat what the app was for and that there were other places they might find something more suitable to their tastes, but another, far more important thought crashes into her mind. She smirks.

‘You know I’m going to have to notify Copley about this, right?’

They both look like they’ve seen a ghost. ‘You absolutely don’t’ Nicky mutters, pale.

‘I absolutely do. No social media at all, remember?’

‘We were going to delete it anyway’ Joe begs. ‘We’ll do it right now in front of you.’

Nile pretends to think about it for about five seconds. ‘But what if someone has saved those pics of you?’

The look of dispair on their faces intensifies. ‘They can do that?’

Nile has no option but to roll onto the floor as she laughs harder than she has in a whole year.

#theyre old men yelling at a cloud. bless their hearts #Nile Freeman #Yusuf al Kaysani #Nicolo di Genova #Kaysanova #joenicky #my writing #shitpost #its basically a glorified shitpost tbh

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el-gilliath · 4 years

Text

not complete without you

Yeah so I decided to venture into The Old Guard fic with a 6+k fic. This was written for a prompt by @andrea-lyn, who did not want to write it herself but knew that angst and character death is right up my alley, so here we are. A big thanks to my bellowed @winged-fool for the beta.

Though this might be character death, I still find this to be a happy ending. All you need to know is in the tags.

Also includes an immortal dog, and what might be reincarnation.

AO3

Nicky knows his time is up in the most innocent of ways, he stubs his toe against the table in one of their safehouses and it doesn’t immediately stop hurting. Instead, it hurts for hours. His suspicions are confirmed when he cuts himself in the kitchen the day after and the wound doesn’t seal the way it usually does. He hides in the kitchen, cooking for hours until it stops bleeding and he can pretend it isn’t there.

He’s careful the next few days, so very careful, not to let Joe notice that he’s no longer healing. Instead, he watches as Joe spars with Nile, watches his bruises fade into the ether. Instead, he sucks marks into his skin as they make love late at night, admiring them for the three seconds before they disappear. He holds Joe close, distracting him with the sweetest of kisses so he can have another second, minute, hour where they’ll live together for another millennia and neither of their time is up.

He breathes calmly, smiles widely, loves fiercely, the way he always has. He avoids it for three days, allows himself to picture another thousand years with Joe, with Nile, with Booker. The good times they would share and the joy they would experience together, the lives they would save that would go on to save others.

He stops avoiding the minute Joe looks at him with worry. His Joe, his Yusuf, the man he killed countless times before he recognized what was in front of him and loved him fiercely from then on. The man whose love transcends everything, the man he hasn’t needed to speak words to for centuries, couldn’t speak to in the beginning, and now they just understand what the other needs and wants.

The man whose touch still thrills him after all this time.

Nicky closes his eyes, hangs his head, and prays. Maybe there’s no God, and Andy would’ve mocked him for it were she still among them. But he still has faith. Faith gave him Joe, gave him someone so he didn’t have to spend an eternity alone, how can he not still believe.

“Nicoló?”

He can hear the fear in Joe’s voice, feels it deep in his heart as he opens his eyes and looks back at him. God, will the sight of Joe never make his heart stop beating faster, will his short curls never make him want to run his fingers through them? He hopes not, for whatever time he has left.

“Three days,” he replies. He lifts his finger towards Joe, shows him the cut that’s still healing three days later. The cut he’s worked so hard to hide. “It’s my time, Yusuf.”

He knows he should’ve anticipated the wail of grief that escapes Joe as he looks at Nicky’s finger. Knows he should’ve anticipated the complete collapse to the floor the other half of his soul does. Knows he should’ve anticipated his sleek and very quick everything to lounge for a knife from their collection of weapons and slash himself on the arm. Maybe he did anticipate all of it, just like he knows that he needs to let it happen.

He listens as the wails turn louder, watches as Joe slashes his arms again and again in the hopes that his healing won’t set in. Both of them know that it will, but Joe still tries and Nicky still lets him. Watches him try again and again with tears in his eyes and running down his face, his hands clasped tightly together with the sounds of Booker and Nile just outside, asking them what’s going on. He tries to tell them that it’s okay, that they’re good, but he can’t. His world is hurting. His world needs him more than their teammates does right now.

He moves closer when he can. He knows Joe wouldn’t hurt him, but he needs to let his grief out. Nicky’s not going to stop that, he’s had three days to grieve. It’s Joe’s turn now.

He gets close enough to touch Joe and as he stretches out his hand Joe drops the knife immediately, gathering Nicky in his arms as he buries his face in Nicky’s hair.

“Nicoló. Non voglio che mi lasci. Per favore.”

“I’m not leaving you, il mio cuore, not for a long time,” Nicky whispers, moving Joe’s face away from his hair and drying his cheeks with his thumb. “We still have time, mi amore, so much time.”

Joe shakes his head. The grief is so very visible on his face and it breaks Nicky’s heart. “But not as much as we wanted. I cannot continue without you, my heart.”

“You can do whatever you need to. But for now we have time. Anything else will wait,” Nicky replies, giving Joe a soft kiss as he buries his fingers in Joe’s hair as he always wants to. “My immortality might be gone but I’m not gone yet, my Yusuf. I’m not lost to you yet.”

“I wish you would never have to be lost to me.”

“We will deal with this too, as we have dealt with everything else in our life. I swear, I will not leave you before I have to.”

They look at each other, losing themselves in each other as they always do. Nothing will change that, hasn’t in the millennia they’ve been together and it never will. Neither will the force of their kisses, Nicky knows and experiences as he’s drawn into a forceful one. It’s as passionate as always, as loving as always. But tinged with desperation, with sorrow. With loss.

“Yusuf.” Nicky moves away, just slightly, only just enough. “I have not left you. I’m right here.”

Joe nods, the grief on his face disappearing slowly but surely. Nicky knows he’s only hiding it, but he will let him. They will deal with that another time.

“Take me to bed, il mio cuore,” he says, smiling as Joe gets a familiar gleam of heat in his eyes. “I wish to spend the night wrapped in your arms.”

“Then in my arms you shall spend it.”

The next kiss is softer, not as tinged with the despair of the future. It lights his everything on fire, stokes it in his belly the way only Joe can. The way he’s lit it for so long. He cradles Joe’s head, pulling him tighter, closer. Always closer. Joe makes him stand up, walks him backwards to their bed, laying him down slowly as they hit the edge. Their lips never separating. It’s familiar, loving, safe. But still as thrilling as all the other times Joe takes him in his arms and kisses him, still as thrilling as all the other times he undresses him slowly and makes love to him.

Spending the night in Joe’s arms is still the safest place he will ever be.

———

He wakes the next day still cradled in Joe’s arms. They’re naked, the way they prefer to be when they have a room to themselves and everything in Nicky screams to stay there. But the need to talk to Booker and Nile is bigger, though he has no doubts that Booker at least suspects what’s going on. Booker is too smart for his own good at times, as history has shown.

He extracts himself from Joe’s arms, leaning down to kiss his brow and whisper sweet nothings when he makes noises of protest in his sleep. Nicky can only smile at the put open sigh as Joe settles back down, never wanting to be parted from Nicky.

He still leaves him alone in bed, leaving their bedroom and walking downstairs to the kitchen. He knows Booker and Nile are in there before he enters, feels them in his spirit the way he’s always done. He knows they feel him too, their eyes upon him from the second he walks into the kitchen. He has not lost that, still.

“Good morning,” he says smiling. He’s happy to see them smile back. Though he knows they are suspicious, from the way Booker doesn’t completely meet his eyes, or the way Nile’s foot keeps bouncing as if she’s having trouble staying still. “Have you eaten?”

“Not yet, Nile wanted to wait for you,” Booker replies, in the open and honest way he’s been since… Then and all that happened.

“Then I will make us some bre-”

“Are you and Joe okay?”

Booker clears his throat pointedly but Nile just waves him off, obviously not concerned in the slightest by whatever plan Booker probably suggested and she said she would go along with. Nile’s quest for the truth has always been something Nicky has admired, loved, about her. It never gets boring with that around.

“We’re good, Nile. As always,” he says as he starts pulling food out of the fridge, finding a fresh loaf of bread Booker probably left to buy early in the morning, the way he always does when the four of them are near Paris. Still so very French, after all this time. Though Nicky isn’t sure he can say anything, he’s never turned less Italiano after all these years of being alive. “It was a rough night, that’s all.”

“That was not just a rough night, he was-”

“Nile.”

Nicky’s eyes find Booker’s, as he speaks up to make Nile stop her questioning. Booker’s eyes are filled with questions, so Nicky nods, just once, short and precise. He watches Booker’s eyes fill with grief, his posture sagging as he takes in the new knowledge of the world.

“What’s going on?”

Nicky smiles, a loving thing that speaks of the family that they are, Booker smiling back in the same way before they both turn to Nile. She looks worried, scared, in a way Nicky wishes she didn’t have to be. She doesn’t deserve to be, but it’s a testament of who they are and what they go through that those feelings never completely disappear. They never will.

“I’m mortal, Nile,” Nicky replies, going to her and crouching down in front of her as he takes her hand. “I stubbed my toe four days ago and it didn’t stop hurting. Then the day after I cut my finger when I was cooking and it didn’t heal.”

“Nicky!” She yells, her voice wrought with fear for him.

“Shh, it’s okay. Last night was Joe finding out. He did not take kindly to the information.”

“You’re dying!”

“No, Nile. I might be mortal but I plan on living a long life still.” He cups her face, smiling in the face of the tears pooling in her eyes. “I am not leaving anyone in this family any time soon. Besides, I could not leave you alone with only Booker, it would be a cruel fate.”

“Haha,” Booker says as he moves to take over the cooking. “You should be happy I do not speak ill of my elders.”

“Since when?” Nile asks sceptically.

“Since now. If Nicky’s mortal, it means he’s officially a priest again, and one has to follow the teachings of the Catholic Church when in the presence of a priest.”

Nicky can’t help but laugh. He hasn’t been a priest in so long and he’s not planning on becoming one again. He’s done far too many unholy things with Joe, and in his long life, for that to be the case. “I do not think the Church would accept me back, Booker, after all we’ve done.”

“That might be, but you still have faith after all this time.” Booker cracks a few eggs into the skillet. “And in your own words, everything happens for a reason. Your faith wouldn’t let you down like that.”

“I don’t think so either,” Nile says. The only one besides him to still have any sort of faith. “It’s not your time yet.”

“No,” he replies. “It is not.”

He gets to his feet, pressing a soft kiss to the crown of Nile’s head before he walks over to Booker, pulling his head down so he can press a kiss to his temple too. Booker swats him playfully, but he knows it’s just for show. Booker accepts the free affection of his family much easier now, knows he needs it to survive and fight the depression he’s always battled. It’s a sign of faith, of love and forgiveness to kiss his temple for Nicky, whenever he can get away with it. It might not be often, but he still enjoys it when he can. The simple affection and kindness come easy for Nicky and Booker deserves to be shown them.

“Why is everyone but me getting kisses from my Nicky?”

Booker snorts at the mock indignation in Joe’s voice. “He keeps giving them to me, how can I refuse.”

Joe mutters under his breath but still moves over and places his own smacking kiss on Booker’s other temple before he moves over and does the same to Nile. Nicky watches Booker’s reaction, how he freezes slightly before continuing to make (almost burn) the second round of eggs, quickly followed by bacon. Joe has shown Booker he’s completely forgiven many times, though the darkness in Booker doesn’t always believe that. Even knowing as he does that he served his penance in more ways than one and none of them hold it against him anymore. Nicky squeezes his shoulder before moving over and joining Joe and Nile at the kitchen table.

It’s an easy morning, simple and quiet, the way many of their mornings have been in the years they’ve been together, but deep down he knows something has changed. He knows his days with them are numbered, knows that he wants to eventually live out the rest of his days away from the action. And him living out his days means that Joe will leave too. Even if he tried to make Joe stay, there’s no way that he will. No way that he would be left alone without him.

“Did Copley the Fourth give us any information on our target?” Joe asks, reaching for Nicky’s hands and tangling them together as Booker brings their breakfast over to the table. Not the easiest way to eat, but Nicky will never say no when Joe wants to be close.

After James Copley there was Elaine Dawson. After Elaine there was Darren Whitaker. After Darren there’s Mustafa “Moose” King. Or Copley the Fourth as they affectionately like to call him. The Copleys are all chosen by their predecessors, happily keeping them secret and helping them stay out of the ether. Merrick taught them a lesson they never wanted to learn, but they learned it well when they had to. And their habit of trusting one person has proven valuable over the years.

Though Nicky has reservations about Nile’s relations with the current Copley. But he knows this is a tale she must discover for herself. He’s had Joe the entire time, how can he begrudge her some happiness.

“His name is Mustafa. And yes, he did. He gave us all the info we needed,” Nile replies. Joe, Booker, and Nicky all share a look, hiding their amusement from the youngest member of their team. All this time and she is still such a 1990s kid. “We still have about two weeks until we can move out, so I’ll monitor with him-”

“I’ll bet you will,” Booker murmurs under his breath, causing Nile to give him a slight smack.

“Until then there’s no harm in us staying here, right?”

“Staying right here, close to your boyfriend. Yes, no harm.” Booker laughs as Nile smacks him again, harder. “We can stay, Nile. The perimeter is secure and so is this house. I promise.”

“Okay, good. We agree then? Two weeks and then we move out.”

“Si.”

———

They spend the two weeks together, being near one another as much as they can. Nicky knows it’s because they want to savour their time with him, in case something happens on the mission they have to see through. In case he actually dies and does not come back. It’s a somber thought, and one he will not entertain for long. It is not his time yet.

He’s still restless, uncertain in ways he hasn’t been in years. Possibly never, but he doesn’t really remember anymore. The last time he felt any kind of nervous was when Andy was mortal. Though a mission was not what killed her, he does not believe that will be his end either.

———

He’s almost wrong. Feels the panic settle deep in his skull as the bullet tears through his leg. Hears Joe yell in fury, as Booker sprints, faster than Booker has ever sprinted, over to him and starts putting pressure on the wound. Sees him and Nile, even Joe, finally accept that he is indeed mortal when the wound doesn’t close.

He decides then and there that if he survives this then he will leave, unless they need a sniper. He wants to live the rest of his years with his Joe, his Yusuf. He doesn’t want to miss out on the things he never thought he would have.

“I was thinking about that time in Malta,” he whispers, hands tangled with Joe’s as Booker patches him up and Nile watches from the side. Ever vigilant, even if they are out of danger.

“Which time in Malta?”

He gives Joe a look, a slight, secretive smile on his face. The smile he knows Joe adores more than almost anything. His kiss is the only thing Joe adores more.

“Oh, that time in Malta.”

“We should go back there. And stay.”

Booker’s hands still for a second, two, before he goes back to wrapping the wound. Nile takes a deep breath, her controlled breathing loud in Nicky’s ears. Joe just looks at him, a bit of the grief he holds inside on his face. But he smiles back, loving and warm as always.

“Yes, let's go back to Malta.”

“Do you guys mind, if we leave?” He asks. He will not leave Booker and Nile alone if they do.

“Not if we can come visit,” Nile replies, her gaze sad but a smile appearing on her face. Booker nods in agreement, short and sure like Booker always is nowadays.

“Any time you like,” Joe says, looking at them both. Nicky watches him catch Booker’s eye as he says the second part of his sentence. “If we don’t see you at least once a year we will come find you, comprendre?”

“Oui. Ce sera mon honneur,” Booker says with obvious relief. “Where in Malta will you go?”

“We have a place.”

———

Nicky understands now, why people who get hurt complain about the lingering aches of time. His foot healed well, exactly the way it should but ten years from that date it still pains him on days with bad weather, when he takes the wrong step or if he sleeps slightly wrong. He’s felt every one of these ten years, from the way his body aches in ways it never has before, to the greys in his hair, to the way Joe looks at him. He’s never doubted that Joe loves him, he doubts it less now, their simple lives in their cottage a testament to that love and devotion.

Their cottage is a place of emotion and has been since Nicky acquired it in the late 1800s. It’s been ‘inherited’ down his family, all of them versions of his alias of course. But from Nicolò de Genovo to Nicky Genova it’s still his. His place to call home with Joe. Secretly at first, in the open now though Joe is still careful when he’s outside so people do not believe he hasn’t aged. A little makeup and some hair changes has always kept them safe.

Nicky doesn’t need that now, aging gracefully as he is. Some part of him has been waiting for this, but his sadness at doing this without Joe is still there. He keeps it to himself as much as he can but after so long it’s not the easiest to do. Knowing Joe feels the same makes it all better.

He knows Joe tests his healing every month. In the hopes that his has ended well. It breaks both their hearts that it hasn’t. But they do not focus on it.

Instead, they focus on the good things, how living a quiet life suits them. They focus on Joe’s endless fascination and admiration for how Nicky changed. They focus on loving one another and making the most of all their days.

They travel when they want to, rediscovering memories in good places, make better ones in bad places. It’s a simple life, but a good one. They meet up with Nile and Booker when they are able, the two of them still together and doing what they can for the world. Joe joins them at random intervals when he’s needed or wanted, Nicky as well. Though now he stays out of sight, doing his best work with his sniper rifle when it’s needed.

A simple life, a quiet one. But still filled with excitement and adrenaline, when they want. And if Nicky joins Moose in doing research often enough that Moose gets exasperated because technology is not Nicky’s strong suit, no one has to know. Though Booker laughs at him when he has the chance. So everyone knows.

His favorite days still belong to Joe. Sleeping till late, spending slow and quiet mornings in bed, soft touches and lazy kisses that turn hot and possessive in mere minutes, their skin gliding together in a symphony well practiced and lovingly done, both of them screaming for an encore the minute they finish, even if Nicky’s body doesn’t always appreciate it these days. He still loves to bury his hands in Joe’s hair, tugging the way he knows Joe adores while pressing bruising kisses into his skin as Joe takes them in hand and brings them to completion on the less than good days, or one of them coming deep inside the other on the better days.

His body might grow older, but their passion never does.

———

Twenty years down the line and he’s noticeably older, his hair longer and full of grey, his body softer and slightly less defined even if he’s still muscled and fit. His body is technically in its 50s now, even if his mind and experience have passed a millennium.

They’re still in Malta, still in their cottage, still living a peaceful life. But over the ten years they’ve been joined by a Briard dog that Nicky found on the streets one day, his tawny colored fur matted and filthy, the dog angry and scared as Nicky approached it. Thankfully he’s always been patient, he has been with Joe for a very long time and his lover does know how to push buttons, so with a bit of time and some cold cuts he managed to get the dog safely back to their place.

Booker didn’t laugh the first time he heard the dog had been named after him, but a mangy and scared Frenchman, even if the man in question had four legs, was too good to pass up. A few years later and even Booker laughs when both he and the dog react to their names at the same time. And he’s always there to doggy sit if Nicky and Joe decide to travel.

He keeps being told of the adventures of Booker and Booker when they get back from their travels, never by Booker but by the people that live close to them. He decides early on to never tell Booker that he knows, just in case the day comes when he wants to tell them himself. He hasn’t so far but Nicky has faith, always faith.

Though Booker the dog doesn’t seem to be aging, so perhaps Booker the man has finally found the companion he’s been searching for. Nicky sincerely hopes that is the case.

Joe has taken to not being around the other people in their village, after twenty years in the same place without him looking any different, even if Nicky carefully dyes silver into his hair so it seems like he’s aging. Nicky thinks the town’s people know, or at least suspect, their… Joe’s secret. But no one seems to care. Just like no one comments on how Booker and Nile have never changed, on their yearly visit (that often turns into 6 times a year). Nicky pays close attention when he’s out and about with them, especially Joe, but the people around them just smile and greet them as if nothing is out of the ordinary. He’s incredibly thankful for it, he really doesn’t want to leave their place. Especially now that Joe has taken to not going on missions at all.

Instead he stays home with Nicky, seemingly loving the way he turns older, how his flesh fills out more in a natural way of aging, how his hair is turning more and more silver, how the blue of his eyes never loses their shine or affection for the things around them. Joe never stops touching him, never stops running his hands down his body or through his hair, kissing his neck or cheek or shoulder, whichever part that is reachable at the moment. Growing old with Joe by his side is a blessing in that he never feels unwanted or unloved, never feels like his ever changing body is a source of disgust or annoyance. He’s just loved in every moment of his mortal life, as he was in every moment of his immortal one.

It’s a wonderful feeling and it never stops being wonderful, spending the days within reach of Joe and in his arms.

———

Thirty years down the line and he’s in his 60s. He’s been completely fine with his aging body, but turning sixty has been the complete opposite. Especially with Joe’s still young and gorgeous self around. He hates how things are starting to sag, he hates how he can’t keep up with Joe, or even Booker and Nile anymore, he hates how old he feels compared to them. He hates that his foot still randomly hurts.

He has moments of extreme self consciousness, where taking off any piece of clothing in front of anyone, even Joe, wrecks hell on his confidence and self-image. He’s at times afraid to touch Joe because he believes that at any moment Joe will shy away from him, give him a look of unbearable disgust that would destroy his everything. Sometimes he forgets, his mind tricking him into thinking that he’s still young and immortal and he kisses Joe without thinking about it. He’s always horrified when he remembers. But Joe always smiles and wraps his arms around him, no sign of any discomfort on his face. He’ll whisper sweet words into Nicky’s ear and crook of his neck, biting him gently and sucking bruises into his skin, lazy kisses anywhere on his skin and flicking his tongue over the lobe of his ear to rile him up. It always makes Nicky chuckle, that soft, quiet chuckle of his, which in turn makes Joe smile widely and kiss him properly, his hands running up and down Nicky’s body like he never wants to let him go. It usually leads to slow and easy love making that lasts deep into the night, Joe coaxing as much pleasure out of Nicky as he possibly can, while Nicky himself just turns into a puddle of goo who is so deeply in love with his partner that nothing else matters. It reminds him of who they used to be, though Nicky knows that they’re still those people, even if he is older.

He needs the reminder that even if he has trouble loving himself at times, aging as he is, Joe has no trouble loving him, worshipping him, being thankful for every day by his side. He needs to remember, then he won’t have trouble believing it. And perhaps he won’t feel like he has to let Joe go, to live his life away from him and Booker (who really isn’t aging) so he can live it to his full potential with Nile and Booker and not stay with a sagging old man and an undying Briard. Joe wouldn’t leave even if he tried to put it forward and he won’t ever disrespect him like that. It would only cause a fight, one that Nicky doesn’t want to have. He loves Joe too much for that.

“Nicolò, il mio cuore, are you planning on joining me in this water or are you going to stay there all day?”

Nicky looks at Joe, laughing as he splashes around in the deep cerulean water not far from their cottage.

“No, my Yusuf, I don’t want to get my hair wet,” he replies, tugging slightly on his longer, now silvery hair.

Joe snorts, a deep sound that makes Nicky smile fondly, though the smile turns to a grin as Joe walks out of the water and towards him. His body is muscular and gorgeous, tanned skin stretching beautifully over lean hands and slender legs, his shoulders wide and so gorgeously touchable, his waist narrow and tapered. He’s slightly sad he can’t see Joe’s rear, but watching his front in tight swim trunks with the beautiful thighs that he knows the exact strength of is not a bad option. He still spins his finger, laughing lightly as Joe actually turns around and flexes, showing off his ass and his delightful back that Nicky has spent many hours touching, kissing, worshipping as if it is a wonder of the world. And to him it is.

“Prego,” he says as Joe looks over his shoulder. Joe winks and wiggles his ass just because he can before he turns around again and walks over, sitting down in Nicky’s lap facing him.

“I do like your silver hair,” Joe murmurs, his hands coming up to run through Nicky’s hair. Nicky closes his eyes and just relaxes into his talented hands, soft moans dropping unwittingly from his lips as Joe gently massages his head and tangles his fingers in his hair just the way he likes it.

“Jesus Christ, Nicky, you know what those moans do to me.”

Nicky opens his eyes, watching Joe bite his lower lip as he continues his ministration. “It feels very good when you touch me, Joe, you know this.”

“You are a goddamned tease, Nicky.” Joe uses his hands and pulls him close enough to give him a deep kiss. “No wonder I married you.”

“Did you? Marry me? I do not remember this.”

Joe mock gasps, one hand leaving Nicky’s hair to land dramatically on his chest. “Why I never. And here I thought we were madly in love and had a delightful ceremony.”

“You made me speak the Rite of Marriage since Booker said I would become a priest again when my immortality ended,” Nicky says, still smiling adoringly at his beloved, moving up to stroke along his lower back.

“Yes well, we had witnesses, the words were spoken, we both said yes. We’re married.”

“Of course we are, mi amore.” Nicky pushes himself forward to put a small kiss on Joe’s cheek. “I have married you many times during our years together and I will marry you as many more as you wish of me.”

“Molto bene,” Joe whispers, kissing Nicky softly. “Can I touch you?”

The damning insecurity rears its ugly head, making Nicky freeze without meaning for a second. He shakes it off, but Joe is already looking at him with a look he always hopes he doesn’t have to see. It’s not pity, it’s not despair. It’s just a look of understanding that feels wrong, even if it isn’t.. “I’m-“

“Please do not apologize, Nicky. You never have to apologize to me.” Joe sighs, his gaze deep and imploring as he looks at Nicky. “I love you no matter what you look like or feel like. You are the love of my life, nothing changes that.”

“I know,” Nicky replies. “My insecurities about me aging and you staying the same are catching up to me. I know you love me, I know you still desire me, I know you still look at me with lust in your eyes. My mind must catch up, but I do not always find it easy.”

“As long as you know that I do. And that you know I love touching you, feeling your skin against mine.” Joe runs his hands through Nicky’s hair as he talks, moving his hands down the front of his shirt and around to his ass. “I desire your presence every hour of every day and that will never stop. You are my heart, Nicky, and I love you more than life itself.”

“Did I not call you an incurable romantic, once?” Nicky asks softly. He probably has what Nile affectionately calls heart-eyes, but he does not mind one bit.

“Mm, in an armored van on our way to be tortured. What a life we’ve lived together.”

“We still have many years, Joe.” Nicky smiles, a hint of the smug smile he also knows Joe loves. “But for now, do with me as you please.”

“Any time you wish,” Joe replies, locking their lips together. And Nicky loses himself to the man he loves, gladly, willingly. Lovingly.

———

He’s closer to eighty, now. Forty years and change since he lost his immortality. He’s become much more frail in the last ten years, his back aching and his leg never really feels good any more. He’s in slight pain more often than not, even if he’s still in somewhat good shape. He still does light training with Joe when he feels up to it, still swims whenever he can so he can still feel somewhat fit next to Joe.

But he knows it won’t matter for much longer. He can feel it in his bones, in his faith, that he’s running out of time. His mortality has been good, what he remembers of the first thirty-three years and what he knows now of his last forty-five. And all those years in between, all of them with Joe. With Andy, Quynh, Booker, Nile, and Booker the Briard, who’s still running around, currently with the two-legged Booker and Nile who never leaves their side for long.

He’s lived a good life, and a very happy one with a lot of good days. But it’s now that he’s coming up on his last days that the sadness of leaving Joe appears again. It’s always been there, at the back of his mind. Lurking like a bad dream he will never be rid of, the day he goes off to pastures unknown without Joe.

Joe still loves him like he was thirty-three, like he was forty, fifty, sixty. They still sleep the same way they always have, Joe wrapped around him, they still have lazy mornings in bed and long make out sessions that leave them both breathless and panting. Nicky laments the fact that his libido has slowly disappeared more and more over the years, but he still gets an amazing thrill at seeing Joe in the midst of ecstasy, he still adores helping him through it, be it by hand or mouth or their greater collection of toys. He still wants and needs to give Joe everything he can, just like Joe does for him.

They’re having one of those lazy mornings in bed, Nicky tenderly wrapped in Joe’s arms when he notices it. At first he thinks his mind is playing a trick on him, a cruel joke on the last of his days. He closes his eyes, takes a deep breath and reopens them. It’s still there. His heart starts beating a bit faster, his breath taking a quicker pace.

“Joe. You have a bruise on your throat.”

For a moment, a second, two, there’s quiet. Their breaths can’t be heard as they’re holding them, the sound outside the window disappears, the creaking of their cottage stills.

“Are you sure?”

He hears the trepidation in Joe’s voice, and he nods instead of answering. His finger lifts to press slightly on it, he hears Joe do a sharp inhale as he feels it. And once again his everything lunges for a knife, but instead of the slashes he did all those years ago, he does a small cut to his finger. Much like the small cut Nicky did when he first discovered his mortality.

They both watch as the blood wells. And how it doesn’t stop welling as it’s wiped away.

“We’re mortal, together.”

Joe cries, after that. Nicky holds him tightly in his arms, as silent rivulets of tears run down Joe’s cheek. The last of Nicky’s days, and they’re finally here together. The way they’ve always been since they found one another all those years ago, after a few rough starts and a mountain of bad blood to wash away between them.

Nicky can’t help but thank his Dio, the God he might not always believe in anymore but still has faith in that he doesn’t have to live in the afterlife without Joe for long. He doesn’t doubt that Joe is sending his prayers to Allah for the same thing.

They stay in bed that day, the last of Nicky’s days. He knows it now, knows that this is what he was waiting for. Waiting for his faith to give him his happy ending, with the other half of his soul. He falls asleep in Joe’s arms like he has so many times before.

He knows no more from then on.

———

A few days later Booker, Booker the Briard, and Nile enter their cottage. Booker the Briard starts whining the second he gets through the door, running to the bedroom and opening the door with his paws the way he’s done a thousand times before. He stops in front of the bed, a soft woof leaving him as he looks at the two men on the bed.

Nile follows, Booker behind her. They stop inside the door, knowing instantly that both men are dead.

“Of course they went together,” Booker says, grief welling inside of him but still he smiles as he sees their two beloved friends, their family, wrapped together on their bed. In their home for so many years.

“Do you think...”

“No, Nile, they would not take their life like that. Nicky has always had faith that when it was his time to go Joe would follow. And Joe believed the same.” He smiles at her, taking her hand. “Nicky might’ve lost his immortality first, but Joe was never going to leave him alone. There wouldn’t be the one without the other. They were soulmates, from beginning to end. That’s all.”

“We need to bury them,” Nile says, after a few minutes. She’s holding Booker’s hand tightly, tears flowing freely. Grief unites them, but they both cannot help but be happy that Joe and Nicky are still together, wherever they are. “We’ll give them to their final resting place, together.”

“Together.”

———

Years later Booker and Nile dream. Dream of two men, waking up together in immortality. Their hands holding the other, flashes of blue eyes and curly dark hair.

They wake up and smile, Booker the Briard barking around them as if excited about something. Maybe reincarnation isn’t a thing, maybe it never will be. But they still choose to believe.

They find them in a cottage in Malta.

#the old guard #the old guard fic #joe x nicky #yusuf al kaysani #nicolo di genova #sebastien le livre #nile freeman #booker the dog #nicky loses his immortality before joe #but they still go together in the end #moments of a happy life #their cottage in malta #found family

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oldguardhc · 4 years

Text

Old Guard hc #101

Summary: Part 2 of the Decennial Awards (Part 1)

“Our next category is the Weirdest Sleeping Spot! As the title suggests, this category is based on the weirdest spot one has been caught sleeping.” Joe turns on the TV behind him and starts the slideshow of them all snoozing in various spots and positions. “We require plenty of rest to remain youthful. This, unfortunately, means we have to catch our Z’s in some unconventional places.”

“When did you take all these pictures?” Booker asks, leaning forward on the couch. Joe glances back and sees a picture of Booker asleep on top of a fridge. The man wasn’t even curled up on top like one would assume. No, he was half-draped over the top, head and arms hanging on the other side, looking as close to dead one can be while still alive. He looked like a poor Halloween decoration. “I don’t even remember that.”

“That’s because you’re senile,” Joe retorts and immediately wishes he can take it back. Three unimpressed faces stare back at him from the couches and Joe knows that this is going to be counted against him. Dammit. He wants to win the best host at the end of the century. Joe plasters on a winning smile. “I apologize; that comment should have been saved for after the show. All of the pictures were taken some time in the last 10 years; anything before was disqualified. Now, our first nominee, Nicolò, fell asleep in-“

Booker stands up and turns around to look at Andy and Nicky. He gestures wildly at them, some of his drink sloshing onto the floor and all over his hand. Booker slurps up what he can on his hand before saying, “Are we not going to talk about how Joe’s been taking pictures of us sleeping? For more than a decade?”

Andy lobs a peanut at him. “Sit down!” Booker catches the peanut and pops it into his mouth. For a second, Joe hopes he chokes on it.

When it’s clear that he will not, Joe says, “No, we are not. Please take a seat, sir.”

Booker whirls around, spilling more of his drink. “This is an invasion of privacy!”

“You were in a public area.”

“Technically-“

“If you have to start with technically, you’re wrong,” Joe sighs, motioning to the couch more insistently. He feels like he has just finished 8 hours of customer support and was told by his manager to cover for the coworker they’re currently sleeping with. Andy snags the back of Booker’s pants and whatever was left in Booker’s cup is now sitting on the carpet. Wonderful. “As I was saying, Nicolò, over here, fell asleep on a crane that was on top of a 500m building. He had a couple of hours to kill until his target arrived and rather than playing on his phone like any other sane person, he decided to take a nap.” Everyone turns to look at Nicky.

“I still don’t see the issue here. I even set an alarm for an hour before the scheduled arrival,” Nicky says and Andy squints at him.

“The construction workers were using the crane. It was literally spinning the entire day,” Booker says and Joe nods. Some carousels spin less than that crane.

“You cost me 500 euros,” Andy adds with a scowl. “It was supposed to be an easy win. You puked after the teacups.”

Nicky gapes at her. “That doesn’t count! Booker made me eat 5 bananas and drink 2 cans of sprite!”

“It was a projectile. You could calculate the angle of it.” You could. It was absolutely disgusting. Joe had made sure to slip the janitor an extra hundred as he tended to his violently sick husband.

Knowing that this will lead to a full-blown argument, Joe quickly interjects, “Now Sebastien, he fell asleep in the trunk of the wrong car and ended up giving a poor old lady quite the scare. Later, I would like to discuss Sebastien’s concerning taste for younger women.”

“Yeah, she was less than half your age. That’s gross, Book,” Andy teases.

“Preying on the young and vulnerable?” Nicky tuts. “Where're your morals?”

“Fuck you guys,” Booker groans.

“I like older men,” Nicky says. “Thank you, though.”

With a smirk, Joe continues. “Next is Andromache, who fell asleep on top of a moving train and managed to stay on it the entire duration of her nap. In fact, she did not even sway an inch; not even when the train was climbing the side of a mountain.”

“Less stuffy up there,” Andy says, taking a sip of her drink.

“I believe you.”

“Plenty of space.”

“No one’s going to join you, Andy,” Booker groans, leaning back on the couch. “It’s fucking cold up there.”

Nicky tilts his head, eyebrows furrowing. “That’s-,” Joe shares a look of incredulity with his husband and slowly shakes his head. It’s probably best that they leave this one alone for a couple of centuries.

“For our last nominee, Yusuf managed to find a yak and fall asleep on its back.”

“You conveniently left out the part where it woke up startled and kicked you 20 feet away.”

Joe gives him a tight-lipped smile. “Thank you, Sebastien. As always, your contribution is entirely unwanted.” Joe pulls the second envelope out. “Now for our winner,” he opens it and snorts as he reads the card. “Sebastien! Congratulations! You won this decade’s weirdest sleeping spot.”

Booker slowly gets off the couch, like he expects Joe to say ‘Psych!’ and call out somebody else’s name. Andy decides he’s moving too slow and slaps him on the ass.

“Here you go,” Joe hands him the prize when he’s a foot away and Booker frowns.

“A sleeping mask from Delta Airlines?” It’s folded in half and barely thicker than a paper towel.

“To make your sleep more pleasurable.”

“There’s a better one in the bathroom upstairs.”

“Don’t be ungrateful, it’s rude.” Did no one teach their kids manners these days? “What do you have to say?”

Booker shrugs and rubs the back of his neck. “I’m sorry, Margaret. Both cars were extremely similar.” It’s not a bad apology. Joe has definitely heard worse.

“One was a minivan, the other was a hummer, you dumbass!” Andy heckles. Sadly, she’s not lying.

“Looks the same when you’re drunk and have your eyes 90% closed.”

“Alright, thank you, Sebastien,” Joe nudges him back to his seat. “Continuing with the weirdest theme, our next category is Weirdest Death.”

Andy and Nicky groan, Booker smirks.

“Just give it to Booker already,” Andy says. “Fucker always dies in the weirdest manners.”

“He’s won every single time since he joined us,” Nicky adds, waving a dismissive hand. “Give him his prize and let him do his speech.”

“So you guys can count me off later? No way!” Joe’s not a fool. This is their test. “Unlike our previous categories, this nominee will cover both Nicolò and Yusuf. Our dearest Nicolò and Yusuf were having a lovely picnic in the middle of the safari. They were enjoying a nice Pinot Noir with some young cantal cheese when they were rudely trampled by a stampede of elephants. ”

“Picnic,” Joe really wants to wipe that stupid smirk off of Booker’s face. Nicky, his dearest heart, reaches over to smack the bane of Joe’s existence over the back of his head. It’s a satisfying thunk too. “Ow! I only have one brain, Nicky, Jesus!”

“More like one brain cell,” Nicky responds. Joe almost bends down onto one knee right there.

No. He has a plan. He’s not going to ruin it because he’s too impatient.

Joe gestures to Andy, “Andromache, was taking a stroll in one of Colorado’s mountains when she accidentally walked into a cult’s trap. After being shot with an elephant tranquilizer, she woke up tied to a tree and was shot with a special marijuana filled bullet as a sacrifice to their Marijuana god.”

“Bullets filled with marijuana,” Booker says, impressed. “If I weren't here, that’d surely be the winner.”

“I know,” Andy grumbles, taking an angry swig of her drink.

“For our reigning titleholder, Sebastien continued to drink an excessive amount of soda, despite everyone telling him that there were not going to be any bathrooms for another hour. Our stubborn Sebastien, of course, ignored us and after drinking 64oz of Pepsi, he had to pee. So in the pouring rain, Andy pulled over. Sebastien sprinted to the treeline and as he began to relieve himself, Zeus struck our poor nominee. He died in his puddle of pee.”

Nicky shakes his head, looking at Booker with a little bit of awe. “How do these things keep on happening to you?”

“The comedic gods really like me.” Something out there really likes him, that’s for sure.

Joe pulls out the correct envelope and is completely unsurprised with what he reads. “Our winner is, of course, Sebastien! Congratulations!” Joe picks up the prize and holds it out; Booker takes it with a grin.

“A voodoo doll of myself?” The doll has a denim jacket and the same haircut Booker has been sporting for the last six years. Booker pokes the doll’s eyes and squishes its plump body. “I’m keeping this.”

“And not the other prizes?”

“This one is custom made; it gets custom treatment.” He has a point. “As for my speech, I would like to thank myself, the greatest and worst person to exist.”

Joe shares another look with his husband. Andy, on the other hand, says, “The prize should’ve been therapy.”

“Okay,” Joe says after an awkward moment of silence. “Thank you for your speech; please return to your seat so we can continue.”

#the old guard #joe x nicky #sebastien le livre #andromache the scythian #tog crack #hc #i'm thinking 3 more parts?#since there's 6 more categories

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kaydeefalls · 3 years

Note

For the writer ask meme: 3, 11, 12 for The Pride

Aw, nice, thank you! The Pride Pact, cheesy meet-cute AU of my heart.

3. Any deleted scenes that didn't make it into the fic?

Nope! I wrote this one in chronological order and 100% by the seat of my pants, just grooving with where it decided to take me. Never had anything extraneous to delete. (That's pretty normal for me, though -- it's rare that I write entire scenes and then delete them later. It definitely happens, but not often.)

11. What happens to these characters 2, 5, 10 years later?

You know, normal stuff. IDK, these are the most real-world-normal versions of the TOG characters I've ever written. Nicky and Joe definitely move in together way too quickly, probably within a couple of months. Joe switches career paths a couple of times, trying to figure out a way to make a living in the arts a little more directly. Nile bullies them into holding their wedding reception at the Guard and is genuinely surprised and thrilled when they actually follow through. She and Celeste probably shack up at some point. Lykon finishes his degree and becomes a social worker, but keeps pulling bar shifts anyway because he enjoys it and likes the excuse to hang out with Andy and Quynh. Everything is soft and occasionally stressful because that's what real life is but they all stay friends and stuff. Just nice happy things, IDK.

12. Pick a scene and give writer's commentary on your thoughts.

OH GOD HOW DO I EVEN

fine

Once in the cab, he ignores Joe as best he can, resting his head against the window. The glass feels cool against his face. Finally, Joe breaks the silence. "I'm sorry," he says. "I don't know what I said that pissed you off so much, but whatever it was, I am sorry."

"Okay," Nicky tells the window, still not looking at him.

"Nicky." When he doesn't respond, Joe reaches out to rub Nicky's shoulder. "C'mon, please. I don't think you've ever been mad at me before, and I really want to make it right. This sucks."

Nicky considers shrugging him off, but realizes he's already leaning into Joe's touch in spite of himself. "It's nothing, it's stupid. I'll probably forget about it in the morning anyway."

"I won't, though. Please, Nicky, just talk to me—"

"I just wish you would stop bringing up the damn Pride pact," Nicky says, all in a rush, knowing exactly how ridiculous he must sound. "Like—it's fine, whatever, I know you and I are never going to…" He swallows and shakes his head. "I've made my peace with it. But you don't need to keep reminding all our friends exactly how unfuckable you think I am."

Joe freezes, his grip on Nicky's shoulder tightening. "That's not—"

"I know that is not how you intend it," Nicky says quietly. "It's just a joke at this point, but that's how it feels, so. I wish you wouldn't."

So, like, it's no secret that the Pride pact is based on an actual agreement I made (at Pride) with the woman who is now my wife, because we were the only two queer women in a social group dominated by gay men. (Very little else about the fic is based on RL, but the basic premise, yes.) Anyway. The way SHE tells it, she'd tried to chat me up a few times at that point, but I was clearly not interested, so she proposed the pact as a way to prove that we could just be friends and I wouldn't have to worry about her Making It Weird. From my perspective, I legit had no idea she was interested and felt very Warned Off by the way she shot me down out of absolutely nowhere when we weren't even flirting or anything. But whatever, it's all good.

Fast forward a couple of years. We're still just friends. She still brings up the pact as a joke among our friends on the regular, and at one point I get drunk with a mutual friend and rant about it to him for like an hour because, like, I haven't had a date in ages and there are still only a bare handful of other female-identified folks in our friend group and I would really appreciate it if my ONE friend who is also inclined towards women would stop reminding all of our mutual friends exactly how unfuckable she finds me. (Unbeknownst to me, the reason she keeps mentioning it is because she is solidly crushing on me at this point and is overcompensating because she still doesn't want to make it weird.)

That conversation between Nicky and Joe? We never actually had it. Because it honestly wound up not being relevant by the time we got together in real life, and it was just that one random night I got really ticked off about it -- it's not something I was genuinely upset by, it had just been a weird night and I'd been in a shitty mood. But that's my imagining of how much more quickly we might have gotten our shit together if we'd ever actually TALKED ABOUT IT like freaking grownups. Living vicariously through fictional characters, folks!

(Other fun fact: my wife reads almost all my fic before I post it these days. When she got to that scene, she was like OH MY GOD IS THAT WHAT YOU THOUGHT THE WHOLE TIME and it was legitimately hilarious.)

#ask me anything #scriggle-scraggle #more info than you probably needed! but i think it's hilarious anyway

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petewentzisblack1312 · 3 years

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hey dils!! was listening to sunshine riptide and thought of u so i wanted to say i hope ur taking care and also ask if u have any favorite fob videos/interviews?? lately i have been obsessed w the promo video patrick did for the honda civic tour where he drove around LA and said the only reason they got the tour was because he already drove a civic ahsjdbd

first of all it is SO flattering that listening to sunshine riptide made you think of me 🥺

secondly i was molded out of clay to answer this question, 100% i have a lot that i think about like way too often

the one where petes giving a tour of his parents house where he lived at the time and was showing off his stuff and was particularly very excited about the fact that his band was turned into action figures and then half way through andy shows up and is like "were best friends forever!" and petes like "yeah andy comes over for sleepovers a lot, we hang out in my basement and make zines and stuff" and then at the end he gets all excited cuz he hears his moms car pull up and he goes out and shes coming out of the car and then patrick gets out of the car carrying groceries and petes like "here mom me and patrick can put the groceries away you finish the interview" and shes like "no- pete i just got home from work im a mess" and hes like "what? no! no mom you look great, you can finish the interview well take in the groceries" and then she did and the camera crew came back to the two of them messing around and putting groceries away.

"pete wentz is honestly the only way to describe pete wentz. hes the most complicated guy i know." [cut to] "if anyone can make a strike without touching the lane i will pay you $300" *throws bowling balls straight into the air* *runs down the lane*

ok but in all seriousness i love that interview not only for that iconic moment but because later the footage is like blaring i dont care and pete goes and grabs a stuffed giraffe out of the prize thingie and hes like "what do you mean :)? we bought this with our tickets!!" and the editors are very much trying to make it a bad boy rebel without a cause moment except if you looked the woman behind the counter had a smile on her face and was laughing and then afterwards he gave it back and said "we werent really gonna steal it" but it really seemed like she knew that already

and then at a different point a couple fans showed up and they were all shy and excited to meet him and he was just like "hey are you guys coming to the show later" and they were like "yeah" and he was like "cool! thanks for coming out :) do you want a picture?" and they took a picture and it seemed like he was still kinda excited that people were excited to meet him. marcus (their bodyguard) was like trailing behind him and smiling and laughing throughout most of these antics and i just think thats sweet.

later in this same interview once again as they were on the ride back to their hotel or whatever theyd brought back a fake moustache and patrick put it on and did a bunch of dumb impressions.

patrick: if i wasnt doing music i think id be like a music critic or music journalist or something

andy:...i thought you said youd work at walmart

theres this one srar era interview thats just joe and patrick riffing for like 15 minutes. like it looks like they just straight up forgot the interviewer was there its so funny theyre such good friends.

this one joe and pete interview where i dont even really remember what they were talking about but theres a moment where joes talking about music with this intense passion and pete just kinda looks at him with this level of brotherly pride that keeps me going

this one andy and pete interview where 1) there were waterfowl chillin behind them which was deeply fascinating to andy and 2) they took a moment to swivel their chairs and hug each other bc theyre besties

band superlatives, specifically the moment where theyre all separately like "technically marcus isnt in the band but like. its marcus." bc that was sweet, unofficial 5th member of fob. and also "whos the most talented" "patrick. patrick. its patrick, hands down." "hm. petes like a really good soccer player" like thats a moment out of a fucking sitcom

halloween asmr with pete wentz. the man cant act but god can he commit to a bit.

there was this like live text chat that they all were in with fans on some radio station website. there were a lot of very fun moments, including joe saying "this is very current technology." as a comment on how very dated the live chat was and andy being like "can we set an icon i wanna change mine to an XVX" and pete and joe being like "oh are you vegan straight edge? we had no idea." and then pete was like "actually i wanna change my icon to andy hurley" and andy was like "no pete im not gonna send you a picture of me" and he was like :( and then a minute later he changed it to andy and he was like, and i swear this is almost a direct quote "BOOM! i love my life haha" and andy was like "goddammit" like i have no idea where to find this but it was so good.

theres this one "this or that" interview with joe and andy wherein the interviewer was a woman and like she seemed pretty at ease around them and got to the last question and imo seemed kinda uncomfortable and kind of established (in a way that seemed like she didnt usually do that) that it was a gross question, which was "would you have sex with a super hot celebrity but shes just died" and both of them were like "hey. what the fuck. absolutely not." and shes like "oh thats a first" and they are both like "do people say yes to that????????" and shes like "youre literally the first people to say no haha" in a way that made it seem that she did not find it funny and i just find that to be an interesting moment and i hope shes doing well and has a better producer now.

theres this one interview w andy on a hardcore podcast where the interviewer asks andy "do you every wish fall out boy were more political?" and he said (paraphrasing) "fall out boy is political, in its own way. we may not be as explicit with our politics as my other stuff, but kids find fall out boy, and through me, with all my other bands, or through joe, since he does a lot of metal, find heavier stuff, and are introduced to this stuff and to being vegan straight edge or anarchist or just more radical politics, and i dont think that just because we arent being super political in our music we arent a political band" which was really something to me bc i had just been thinking about that as a concept i call "gateway punk"

theres this one interview i recently found of a very small chicago music news outlet where a young lady interviewed pete and asked far more interesting questions than any other interviewer id ever seen and one such question was how he felt about the legalization of marijuana in illinois and he said that it was cool that it was legal but everyone locked up for it right now should be released and i like that he got to be political

theres a moment on the badass jew podcast episode joe was on where the interviewer whomst i do not recall was espousing some veiled antiblack sentiments wrt some antisemitic comments some famous black people had made and joe just completely rebutted it immediately and pointed out that black people not only are not a monolith bht are at a greater disadvantage

and also he made a joke that i could never make and cant fully get bc im not jewish but it was very funny and i love hearing people make jokes that arent for me.

this one interview before patrick had kids where he was saying how everyone kept asking him and elisa when theyd have kids and he was like "you cant just make that happen yknow? how do you just do that?" and pete immediately grinned and leaned over and mock whispered "you have sex" and patrick punched the air and was like "i hate you so much"

that one interview about abap where pete was like "we actually got the guy who did the whistles on patience by guns n roses to do it on this" and then he looks over at patrick and patrick shakes his head and petes like "you couldnt let me have this?" and he was like "i was gonna but then you looked at me and i just couldnt."

"whats the most important thing to you right now?"

patrick: star wars

joe: my daughter.

patrick: ...my son?

the puppy interview. everyone involved including the puppies was having the time of their goddamn life.

i have to stop this is too much its been like an hour

#dils declares #theyre so stupid.

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