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southernswampmamma · 9 months ago

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Magic Man: Intermission Stories 1,2

Original! Male Character x Original! Black Female Character

Chapter Warnings: None

Summary: Yolana Humphry spent her entire life stuck in Tapioca, Alabama, under the thumb of her controlling Aunt Freda. That is, until a stranger comes along and swoops her off her feet. A charming man, that everyone but herself seems to know; who easily bypasses her fragile walls and embeds himself in her heart. Escape, however, doesn’t seem to be the end of Yolana’s journey. With her newfound freedom, she now has the opportunity to pursue something she never thought she could obtain.

Please Enjoy!

Short Story 1

Mrs. Henderson vs Ms. Robin

Jaunita Henderson waited until the motorcycle was well down the street before she moved from her spot at the window, straightening her blinds before moving to her kitchen. There was deep sadness that Juanita couldn’t say goodbye to her friend before she pulled off, but Juanita will be sure to contact Yolana later when she was settled. She sashayed over to her pristine white counters and got ahold of the freshly baked fig loaf wrapped in pretty lemon decorated wax paper. Juanita hadn’t baked a loaf in years, but found that this occasion was worth taking her family’s old cast iron loaf pan out of storage. She tucked the soft loaf in her arms like a sleeping baby and shuffled her shoes on by the door. After shutting and locking her door, the nearly 80-year-old woman strolled her way over to her next-door neighbor. With all the calmness and confidence in the world, Juanita solidly knocked on the red door in front of her. She noticed a blue flash in the corner of her right eye and brought her attention to it. It was a little camera that winked back at her every second and she guessed it was the door camera. She leaned over to it, giving it a Colgate smile and a blithe wave before facing the door once again.

She waited for a few more seconds before the door slowly opened to a gray and thick-haired woman with a mistrusting hazel eye on the other side. She was holding an electronic tablet to her large bosom, wrapped in a leather, cross bearing, case. The woman obviously wasn’t expecting any visitors. Though she was dressed for the day, her clothes were wrinkled and her gray strands were topped very topsy-turvy atop her round head. A rather large orange sweater that did not match in the slightest sat on her shoulders, well, one side on her shoulders. These were a few things that Juanita noticed before the woman decided to open her mouth. Her voice came out small but high pitched, normal for her. It was very childlike and innocent, unlike its owner, light and airy, also unlike its owner. For Robin was a heavy-set older woman who would much rather live at her son’s house, overstaying her welcome, than minding her own home and beeswax. Juanita didn’t know what was worse: a loud, nosy neighbor who works out in the open, or a quiet one who works in the shadows.

After Robin inquired about Juanita’s visit, Juanita presented the fig loaf from her arms to the other woman. She reminded Robin of her long absence from the neighborhood and was happy about her return. Robin cut her eyes from Juanita to the fig loaf, then back to Juanita. Juanita didn’t doubt for one minute that the other woman wouldn’t reject the loaf. She couldn’t resist a free dessert, as well, who would she be to turn down a gift from a neighbor? Definitely not Christian. Robin put on her most realistic faux smile, the one she liked to give to the rainbow haired fellow at the Piggy Wiggy. She thanks Juanita for her act of kindness and explains that it is so hard being a grandmother, especially when the wife your son chose is completely inept. It was a tale spun from a liars mouth, Juanita thought. She knew that Robin couldn’t leave her son alone, and the fact that he was letting her intrude in his separate life meant trouble for him in the future. After Robin’s self pat on the back, she brought her hand out for the loaf. Juanita, with a better faux smile, handed it to her lovingly. Juanita wished her well, Robin thanked her again, and both ladies’ content returned to their homes.

It wasn’t until 8pm that evening when Juanita got a call on her house phone. Knowing every number by heart, she excitedly answered the phone before wrapping her little body back inside her plush throw blanket. She answered the phone sweetly. She heard heavy breathing on the other side. Juanita wasn’t sure if Robin was breathing so hard from lack of enough oxygen or anger. It wouldn’t bother Juanita either way.

“What did you do?” a very distressed high pitched voice aired from the other end. Juanita slid a malicious grin on her face.

“What’s wrong Robin?” she didn’t even try to pretend anymore. The jig, though barely a jig, was up.

“I have been back and forth to the bathroom ever since this morning!”

“Oh, no.”

“Now I ain’t ate much today, but I have a feeling that my stomach troubles have a lot to do with that loaf you brought me today?”

“Well, Robin, did you eat the whole thing? What am I saying? Of course you did! You can’t help yourself.” Juanita sipped out of a large wine glass.

“What did you do to it?” Robin’s tone heightened. Juanita compared it to a squealing pig,

“Well, Robin, all I did was go by the recipe. An old family recipe, it was, though I had to make some adjustments.” Juanita didn’t wait for Robin to ask. “The birds ate all the fresh ones, so I had to use old ones. Also, since I’m not too good at reaching up, I had to pick them off the ground.”

“Are you serious Juanita! I ate all of that cursed loaf. What made you think that it was a good idea to feed someone rotten figs?” Robin inhaled a hard breath. “I’ve been on the toilet all day!”

“Oh, no that must burn, but I’m sure you’re used to a little burn considering you have the Devil’s hot rod up there on a daily basis.” And that stinger was courtesy of her late husband.

Robin was too shocked to speak. The only thing heard was brief spurts of shocked inhales.

“Why would you do something like this? I did nothing to you,” she said after a while. If she didn’t really know the lady on the other end of the phone, Juanita would probably feel bad from the pathetic tone.

Jaunita sat up from her soft and cushy couch. “Well, sometimes we do bad things to people who do absolutely nothing to us beforehand. Like how that sweet girl didn’t do a damn thing to you and you had to stick your nose in things and mess them up. Just like you’re sticking your nose in your son’s life; probably going to fuck that up, too.” The old black woman crossed her legs. “So, have fun shitting the night away.”

“I- I- I am going to report you!”

“Ha! With what evidence? You ate it all!” Jaunita hung up the phone

Short Story 2

Belvin Returns

Even after all the time it took him to reverse out of that godforsaken man-made trail, bounding back through that shotty road, and hobbling through the streets of his former neighborhood, Belvin still didn’t know what to say to Freda. Well, he knew what to say; the truth, it would have been easier, but he still didn’t want to deal with her unhappiness. His car mirrored his heart in its constant creak and ache as it rolled through the neighborhood. What he did was right. He knew that for a fact, but it still hurt. And it will hurt still to tell Freda the news. He thought.

As his car shook throughout the neighborhood, he breathed a sigh of reprieve seeing his old home in his sights. He missed the neighborhood, not because of time apart, since he was constantly there doing random things around the place, but because of the missed comfort. His current home didn’t feel the same. It never will. There, Belvin saw a frantic-looking Freda walking up and down the driveway with her phone pressed firmly to her face. Her head was moving all over the place to show she was talking, and she was talking loudly. Her heels were cast to the side in the grass while her bare feet walked across the concrete. Belvin couldn’t see her face, but he knew she was upset, but when she turned in his direction, and he saw her, he mentally stopped and physically stopped the car. Her mouth wasn’t weighed down with fear, it was snarled with bitterness. Her brows weren’t pinched with worry, they were sewn together with anger. He stared at her while she yelled and spit, not knowing what she was saying, but not liking it all the same. He’d seen that too often, but the hurt he felt in that moment and the tears shed and unshed flushed his vision to what was truly in front of him.

Freda noticed him. She waved him over, looking at him, wondering why he was just sitting there unmoving. Belvin slowly drove up to the driveway, parking on the street. He watched as Freda padded down to his car before snatching the phone from her face. She threw her hands around before speaking.

“Where is Yolana?” she ducked her head to the side to look in the back seat to see if Yolana might be there. Belvin took a long time to answer her, but he answered her. “What? What do you mean? You were supposed to go get her!” Freda yelled.

Belvin looked at her. The more he looked at her angry face, the less hurt he felt, and the more it was replaced by his own anger. Freda put the phone back to her face after placing a finger up to Belvin for him to wait. Whoever was on the other end was obviously getting chewed out, for Freda let them know loud and clear that she was not done with them and the conversation will be picked up later. When she was done, she leaned herself into the passenger side to get real close to Belvin while she waited for him to explain.

“Yolana left with Nathan.”

“He took her.”

Belvin shook his head. “Yolana was on the back of Nathan’s motorcycle by her own choice. So, I let her go.”

“YOU LET HER GO?”

“SHE WANTED TO GO!”

It’s rare for Belvin to yell at Freda, but Freda being Freda, she didn’t let that faze her. She did let his words sink in, however.

“She, she wanted to go?” she slowly stood. “That ungrateful, disrespectful little girl! After all I said to her, after all I’ve done for her, she thinks she can just get up and leave with a stranger? A white man. OLDER THAN HER, BY THE WAY!” Freda locked eyes with Belvin again. “And you let her? You knew how I felt about that boy, and you let her go with him. What kind of uncle does something like that?” Freda takes a breath, throwing one strong finger in Belvins’ direction. “You know who Yolana is. She’s not equipped to just leave the house. She doesn’t know how to do anything; I have to do everything for her. What is she supposed to do out there with that strange man? How is she supposed to protect herself? What, is she going to draw herself a map out of danger? She’s a crybaby. She can’t cry her way out of things like she does with you.”

“She can’t run to her uncle Belvin, shed a few tears, and be saved from whatever that behemoth decides to do with her. For all you know, you led her straight into her grave, Belvin! If not, then I’m sure she will catch hell there and I aint even mad at it. Because she should have listened to me, she should have stayed her butt home, she should have ... God told me this from the moment I found out she shaved her legs when she was 13 that she was going to be fast like her mother. I tried so hard to stop it from happening, but now look what you’ve done. It’s all your fault Belvin, I told you to bring her back to me-”

“SHUT YOUR MOUTH!” Belvin yelled.

“DON’T YOU TELL ME-”

“SHUT YOUR LYING MOUTH FREDA!” Belvin roared. He was outside his car and face to face with her before she could retaliate. Having him so close to her took her off guard and for a moment, a rare moment, Freda couldn’t grasp words to say.

Belvin was shaking; nose flared and eyes bulged. He hadn’t been so angry in a long time. Matter of fact, he was far from angry, pass livid and looking at irate in his rearview mirror.

“I let Yolana go because I knew deep down that there was nothing for her here. No friends, no home, and barely any family. I knew that she was better off; more safe with Nathan than anyone else here. With all the stuff you said just now and all the blame you put on Yolana and me, it’s clear you aint got no idea who’s truly at fault. Do I need to find a mirror for you, Freda, or can you understand what I’m saying to you?” Belvin stepped closer. “You are at fault here. Yolana is running from you and this life you gave her no choice but to live. She can’t do nothing without you because you fixed it that way. You scared her enough to believe that foolishness herself. All these years she ran to me because I was the only person she could cry to.”

“Now, you can yell at me all you want, but I’m getting tired of you blaming Yolana. Calling her names and saying she’s things that she aint ever was. All because you can’t let go of the past? I’m ashamed of myself for letting it get this far. I am ashamed it wasn’t me saving her from all of this.” A frustrated tear rolled out of one of his eyes and mingled with the sweat that was forming under his chin. He was still shaking. “I’m so, so ashamed that I hadn’t seen the devil in you until now.”

Belvin finally relaxed. He was still shaking, but not from anger, but from the energy it was taking to not break down. Maybe it was time for him to open his eyes even more and focus them on himself. He had spent a good part of his life bending backwards for his ex-wife. So much so that he hadn’t seen what was truly going on. Well, that was a lie. Belvin saw it all, but he didn’t think it was as serious as it really was. Maybe he thought it would fix itself or that he could fix it with his constant intrusions into the matter. However, at that moment, with Yolana gone and Freda hysterical, maybe there was no fixing it. As the man, he should have stepped up, but all he did was lay down to be walked on. He needed to work on that.

Freda wasn’t saying anything. Indeed, she wasn’t doing anything. She wasn’t moving; she wasn’t breathing; she wasn’t even blinking. Freda was just standing there with her fists clinched, eyes wide, and chin quivering. It was taking a long time for her to process all that Belvin said and that seemed to have shut her up temporarily. Belvin looked at her, expecting her to burst at any moment and start up again, but she didn’t; she didn’t move. So Belvin did.

“I’m going to church.” It was all he said before turning away. He didn’t even know if church was still in progression, but he was going anyway. Just because he needed to.

He left Freda standing there, stationary, only her eyes following him as he drove away from her.

#magic man #original fiction #original male character #original female character #black female lead #black female character #black reader #magic man intermission #southernswampmamma

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is0gild · 4 years ago

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Ice Cream and Fire Oven Pizza - Bonus Chapter 6

Pairing: Elsa x Lea/Axel || Side Pairing: Riku x OC

Summary: Modern AU. She's an introvert ball of nerves who works at Ice Palace, a mall food court ice cream shop. He's the outgoing, sassy goofball who works at the Pizza Planet across the way. Hilarity, snark, and fluffy romcom hijinks ensue.

Word Count: 9,761

FIRST CHAPTER || PREVIOUS CHAPTER || NEXT CHAPTER

Credit for super friggin’ cute and super friggin’ amazing cover art goes to the super friggin’ talented ky-jane here on tumblr!

Ice chips.

A whole paper cup full of them.

This was my current mission. My purpose. My whole reason for existence in this one very specific moment in time.

For if every wholesome, family-friendly sitcom from the 90s were to be believed, ice chips were like crack to women in labor - they just couldn't get enough of the stuff.

Why? No one knows, least of all me… okay, maybe doctors knew but if they did, not a single one had yet to clear up that little mystery for me.

The why didn't really matter anyway. All that mattered is that Rayne wanted them. And what Rayne wanted, Rayne got.

Especially when she was about to shove a brand new tiny person through her body and out into the world any second now.

...at least, in theory anyway.

I thanked the attendant at the nurse station and turned with the freshly secured cup of ice chips in hand, heading down the hospital wing back in the direction of Rayne's room in the delivery ward. As I hurried along, I anxiously ran my free hand down my frazzled braid, grimacing at all the little wisps coming loose before shifting to smooth my fingers along my rumpled dress that I'd been wearing since yesterday. Turning one last corner, my eyes immediately went to Rayne's door-

-only to be brought up short by the sight of fluffy, squishy, huggable reindeer plushie nearly twice my size already waiting politely outside it.

Well there was something you don't see every day.

It only took me a second to spot the shoes poking out underneath that had to belong to whoever was holding the thing from behind where I couldn't see them. I squinted.

I knew those shoes.

With a tiny, tired smile, I put one foot forward once more and approached the giant stuffed caribou with a lightly teasing, "If you're looking for the North Pole, you're off by about a couple thousand miles, Prancer. Or is it Blitzen?"

"Har, har. You're an absolute riot," came a voice from the other side of the massive doll. Though I couldn't see the eye roll, I could distinctly hear it in his tone.

Shaking my head with a soft snort, I dug my phone out of my pocket to check the time. "...1 p.m. already? Can't believe she's been in labor for nearly twenty-one hours." Twenty-one extremely long, extremely sleepless hours for the mother-to-be, not to mention all her loved ones here to support her. Tucking the phone away once more, I told him, "Thanks again for covering my early shift, I really appreciate it. Hope it wasn't too hectic of a morning over at the Ice Palace."

"Hey, don't mention it," Kristoff poked his blonde head up just over the plushie's shoulder. "If it's a choice between the two of us, it's no contest: Rayne'd much rather have you here with her than me." He paused, eyeing the closed door leading into her hospital room with a tiny frown. "...so, still no baby, huh?"

"Still no baby," I sighed, then tipped my head to one side. "Care to explain the reindeer? I didn't even know we made Svens in this size."

"We don't," he shifted his hold on the thing for a better grip. "We got a small batch to try and sell as a test run last year, but no one was really buying 'em. Still had a couple stowed away in back just gathering dust, so got the okay from Frozone to steal one for welcoming the new little Hewley into the world."

A grin pulled at my lips, "How sweet. I'm sure Rayne will love it." I then quirked an eyebrow at him. "...why were you just standing outside with it anyway? You know you could have just walked on in, right?"

His gaze darted to the door once again, then back to me. "...is the yelling still happening?" he whispered with a nervous little wince.

Now it was my turn to roll my eyes as I deadpanned, "It's the beautiful blessed miracle of life, Kristoff. Rayne's allowed to yell as much as she wants. Now come on, there's already one baby on the way, we don't need you being a big old second one." With that, I reached for the door knob, pushed it open and made my way inside.

And straight into the madhouse that was Rayne's hospital room.

"You did this to me, you bastard! I'm gonna KILL you for this, you smug son of a bitch!"

Ah, and there was Rayne now, shrieking her head off.

To be fair, if you'd been in labor for nearly a full day now, you'd probably be shrieking your head off too.

"Yes, hon."

And that'd be Riku, the absolute picture of patience and composure as he smiled lovingly through the abuse, both verbal and physical as Rayne's death grip just had to be murder on his hand right now. But he was soldiering through it like a champ.

Huffing and puffing, Rayne spat, "Don't you 'yes hon' me with that stupid, sexy, annoying, beautiful, infuriatingly perfect little grin of yours, pal! When I'm through with you, you won't have anything to grin about!"

"Yes, hon," he chuckled softly, gently sweeping a few of her messy bangs out of her face before pressing a light kiss to her sweaty temple.

"Oh-ho, no! None of that!" she snarled, narrowing her eyes at him. "It's stuff like that that started this whole damn mess, jerkface!"

"Yes, hon."

We were all handling being included in this special moment in Rayne's life a bit differently, each doing what we could to keep her happy and distracted from the contractions. As could be seen, Riku was doing his part by being a flawless model husband/punching bag combo. Sora-

"What does every moogle need in the morning?"

Sora was trying to make her laugh.

"A kup-o coffee!"

...and was doing a rather poor job of it.

As Rayne stared blankly up at him, Sora gave a tiny sheepish laugh from where he stood at the foot of her hospital bed as he scratched the back of his head. "That one was a dud, huh? Okay, okay, how about this one? What do moogles use when they go shopping? ...Kupons!"

More crickets from Rayne. This time accompanied with an unamused little eye squint.

Undeterred, Sora smiled brightly and held up his hands, "Wait, wait, I gotta million of these! What did one cactuar say to the other? ...looking sharp! What does a cactuar wear to a business meeting? ...A cac-tie!" Why did the chocobo cross the road? ...he was going for a wark!"

His new rapid fire approach did not seem to be helping matters.

"Alright, no, hang on, I'm gonna get you with this one for sure! You ready? Okay… Knock knock."

Rayne's eye twitched. Patting her hand, Riku obliged his cousin with a sigh, "Who's there?"

Barely able to contain his glee now, Sora replied, "Interrupting chocobo."

"Interrupting ch-"

"BWARK!" Sora crowed in delight.

The expecting mother-to-be looked just about ready to hurl the beeping heart monitor at him.

"Look, Ray, look!" Kairi suddenly chimed in, swiftly coming to her boyfriend's rescue as she shoved her phone in Rayne's face. For her contribution in keeping Rayne's mind off the pain, Kairi had elected to sit in the bed with her to provide cuddles and hundreds upon hundreds of pictures of adorable baby animals. "Aren't these little piggy-wiggies the freaking cutest?"

Frowning at the screen, Rayne said flatly, "...they'd look even cuter in the form of crispy bacon on a bun slathered in barbecue."

Kairi gasped in horror, snatching her phone back to hug protectively to her chest, "Not the piggy-wiggies!"

"Sorry, Kai, but I'm starving and they won't let me eat a damn thing until this little bundle of joy gets the hell out of me," she grumbled back.

She pursed her lips to one side, swiping her thumb across the screen several times now, "Guess I'll skip these pics of baby cows and chicks and- you know what? No farm animals at all, how about that?"

Sora was now sidling up along one side of the bed opposite to Riku, both hands covering his face as he went.

Oh dear.

One could only assume this was leading up to his latest attempt to get a laugh out of her and I was almost dreading how the next couple seconds would unfold.

"No frowning. No sad face. Okay?" he muffled out from between fingers as he blindly inched closer to Rayne. "This birth runs on happy faces, so ya gotta look funny… like me!" He suddenly threw his hands out wide to reveal he was wearing a pair of gag glasses, complete with a comically large plastic nose and mustache. "I-"

Rayne yelped in surprise and socked him in the stomach.

Yup. That'd gone about as well as I'd expected.

And correction… it seemed the role of punching bag would now be played by Sora.

Quite literally.

Eyes growing round as she clasped both hands over her mouth, Rayne said, "Oh god, Sora, you okay? I'm so sorry, but you scared the everliving crap out of me!"

"No, no, it's fine," he wheezed out a chuckle, doubling over and clutching at his gut while Kairi shot him a sympathetic pout as she rubbed his shoulder. "You're bringing a new little life into the world, so you get a free pass!"

Smothering his snickers behind a hand, Riku shook his head at him, "Where did those ridiculous things even come from?"

"These?" Sora held up the gaudy spectacles. "Saw 'em in the hospital gift shop and thought everyone might get a kick outta them."

"Or at least a punch," Kairi teased, sticking her tongue out.

Kristoff and I hadn't been spotted yet. Sensing an opening as the rest of them devolved into light laughter, I was just about to insert myself into the conversation when-

"Beep beep, coming through! Move it or lose it!"

Jolting, I just barely jumped out of the way in time to narrowly avoid getting steamrolled by Anna as she suddenly came charging into the room. Her arms were stacked so high with hospital pillows that she couldn't really see past them, so I suspected she had no clue that she'd just beeped-beeped her own sister.

Yesterday when we'd been racing our way back to Twilight Town, I'd called Anna to make sure she'd heard the news that Rayne had gone into labor. Since we still had had several hours left on the road to go yet before we'd be back and I'd been worried about missing the birth, I'd wanted to make sure that Anna could at least be there in my stead. However I discovered I needn't have even asked, for my sister had already been burning rubber out of Arendelle to get to Twilight Town herself even before I'd called. Thankfully we'd arrived with time to spare - plenty of it, as it was turning out. And bonus, I'd been getting to personally witness Anna's own unique brand of pitching in... that is, by doing anything and everything in her power to make sure Rayne was as comfortable as humanly possible.

Which to Anna apparently meant stealing every last pillow in this medical institution to offer up as tribute to Rayne.

"Ta-da!" she chirped as she dumped the tiny mountain of cushions onto Rayne's bed with a big, delighted grin. "I'm back with a whole friggin' variety this time, so pick your poison! I got soft ones, firm ones, big ones, small ones, some as big as your- you know what? Do you wanna go with all of them? Let's go with all of them! Sound good? Good!" With that, she began gently but eagerly stuffing them one by one behind Rayne's head.

"Anna, sweetie… do you think we're maybe approaching the point of too many pillows here?" Rayne delicately asked, shifting her back slightly against the already substantial collection behind her that Anna had managed to amass in the past several hours.

She wrinkled her nose with a snerk, "What? Nonsense, there's no such thing as too many pillows! And I think you'll be singing a different tune once you get a load of this puppy here," she proudly held up and fluffed a particularly plush looking pillow. "This right here is the Holy Grail of hospital pillows! I earned this bad boy too! Had to throw down with some greedy, wrinkly old fart who was trying to horde all the good bedding for himself!"

"Let me get this straight… you beat up an elderly old man and stole his pillow?" Riku gave her a dull look.

"I didn't beat him up! Just… got in a bit of a tussle, that's all," she brushed off with a tiny shrug. At all the blank stares she received, she huffed, "What, he was crotchety and mean and fought dirty, kept whacking me with his cane! The old coot friggin' deserved it!" She turned her head away with a razz of her tongue before her face lit up once more. "Besides, nothing but the best for the soon-to-be mommy, isn't that right, Ray-Ray?" she cooed as she fondly tucked "the Holy Grail" of hospital pillows (which was the last of her latest haul from all her ransacking and pillaging) behind Rayne. Then she clapped her hands together, "Now! Be right back with more in a jiff!"

Before Anna could dash off again however, Rayne snagged her wrist with a hasty, "No!" As my sister glanced back at her, Rayne winced and lowly hissed her way through what looked to be another contraction before blowing out a relieved puff and exhaustedly chuckling, "The thought's appreciated, sweetpea, really, but try as you might, I just don't think we can quite cram the hospital's entire supply of pillows in this one teeny room."

"But-"

"Ah-ah!" she interrupted her protest, holding up a finger. "Trust me, I'm good. 'Sides, if you keep going at this rate, soon there'll be no room left on the bed for me."

The corners of Anna's lips turned down in a tiny sulk. "I suppose you're right," she hung her head as her hands smoothed over Rayne's bedsheets, flattening any wrinkles. Then she froze mid-gesture, face brightening once again as she looked up with a delighted little intake of breath. "I can get you more blankets! So many blankets! All the blankets!"

"What?! Anna, no, I'm not even-"

But my sister had already blurred out of the room with nothing more than a quick, "Hi, Sis! Bye, Sis!" to me. She didn't even acknowledge Kristoff. Don't think she saw him behind the caribou.

"...cold," Rayne finished with a defeated sigh. Then she seemed to notice me for the first time. More specifically, what I was holding. She immediately perked up, "Ah, there she is! C'mere, oh Great Bringer of Ice! My Ice Babe, my Ice Queen, my Ice Goddess!" She stretched out her arms towards me, making grabby hands. "Gimme!"

Ah, my role in keeping Rayne happy.

Which if it hadn't been obvious already, that greeting should have just made it abundantly clear.

This was actually my first time being present for the birth of somebody's child. And if I was being totally honest here, I had to admit that the experience did make me a bit awkward and anxious. Gussy it up however you like, but the "miracle of childbirth" was some animal kingdom nonsense that I'd normally rather take no part in. It was all just so... er… messy. But this was an important day for Rayne and I wanted to be there for her. Which meant I just had to do what I did for all important things that made me awkward and anxious.

I let it go and did them anyway.

Taking in a breath to quell my jittery nerves, I braved a smile as I approached her bedside and held out the cup which she greedily snatched up. "Got it back here as quick as I could, hopefully it didn't have a chance to melt too much."

Popping a few frozen chips into her mouth, she closed her eyes with a contented hum. "Ahhhh, that's the stuff! You always treat me right, boo! Keep the good shit coming."

"D'aw," I grinned softly, reaching out to lightly pat her cheek, "you make me feel like I'm your drug dealer."

"Don't act like you don't like it," she crunched down on the ice with a cheeky little wink before digging a few more out of the cup to slip between her lips. Then she looked past me and went stock still. She blinked once. Then twice. Then, "...um?"

I glanced back to realize she just now seemed to be noticing the comically large, dopey reindeer in the room. How she hadn't spotted it sooner was beyond me. In any case, I cleared my throat and stage whispered, "Pssst… Kristoff!"

"Right." Taking that as his cue, he started jauntily bouncing forward with the thing, making it do a floppy little jig in the process. Remaining hidden behind the colossal doll the whole time, he adopted a deep, goofy voice to speak for the plushie, "Hello, my name is Sven and I'm gonna be your new lil gal's bestest friend! I'll make sure to give her all the snuggles and huggles and wub she'll ever need!"

For a second, Rayne's expression was unreadable as she just continued to stare at the thing's big, silly face. Then she burst into tears.

Fudge, was this a good crying or a bad crying?

With all the drastic mood swings she'd been experiencing since labor started, it could really go either way at this point.

Everyone began to scramble. Riku was murmuring softly to her as he caressed her cheek, Kairi was frantically trying to pull up what she was claiming to be an absolutely adorable picture of a dog and duck that were besties, and Sora was desperately shooting off lame, punny jokes so fast now that the punchlines were getting all jumbled and mashed together into pure gibberish. However it all turned out to be unnecessary as Rayne suddenly wailed, "Oh my god, I love him!"

Whew, okay, this was a good crying.

False alarm, people, stand down.

"Really?" Kristoff stuck his head up from behind the deer, flashing a lopsided smile.

She nodded her head vigorously, sniffling. "He's perfect for our baby girl! And good news! You've officially just been hired as our full-time nanny!"

He gave a bashful chuckle as he found a corner to deposit Sven in, "Shucks, you don't hafta-" But then he stiffened as her words really sunk in. "Wait, what?"

"Yup! Don't worry, I'll talk to the Ice Palace for you so they'll work your shifts around it. Ah, we're gonna have the happiest kid in the whole wide universe now that she's going to have her own talking, dancing, prancing reindeer to play with every day!" she clapped in glee.

"Every-" Kristoff spluttered and paled. "Now hang on, I never agreed to any of-"

"Da-dun da-dun! Candygram!" a new voice loudly sang out. We all turned to discover Lea now standing in the doorway, grinning like a madman with his arms loaded down with junk food. Way, way too much junk food.

"Good lord, where on earth did all that come from?" was the only greeting he got from me as both eyebrows shot up my forehead.

He shrugged, grin somehow defying all odds to stretch even wider. "Raided the nearest couple o' vending machines and picked the things clean. Hope all you boys and gals are famished cuz tonight we feast like Candyland kings! And you get a chocolate bar!" he tossed one to me, which I fumbled to catch before sensing Rayne's gaze narrowing on me and I hastily hid it behind my back. "And you get a chocolate bar!" This one went to Kristoff. "And you and you and you!" Sora, Kairi, Riku. "Annnnnd…" Lea stopped mid-throw to Rayne, smirking as he retracted his hand. "...not you cuz the Doc said that was a big fat no-no for you, Missy! Guess that just means more for me," he smugly singsonged as he made his way further into the room now.

Nostrils flaring, Rayne growled, "You are such an asshole, Red."

"One," he struck up a finger as he unceremoniously plopped down into a chair against the wall opposite of her, letting all the sweets pile up in his lap, "that's just part o' my roguish charm and you know it. Two, you said a naughty word." He tsked with a shake of his head as he began to peel the wrapper off a Snickers. "Now is that any way for a young lady who any second now is gonna be responsible for molding a young, impressionable mind of our future generation should be talking?"

"Fuck off," she spat out.

"That's more like it!" he laughed, toasting her with the candy bar before heartily taking a bite.

And this, my friends, is how Lea was doing his part to help distract her from the pain.

By being a royal pain in the butt himself.

Fighting fire with fire, as it were.

"Mm-mm-mm!" Lea hummed, putting on a show of enjoying his snack a little too much. "The way that chocolate just melts in your mouth and mingles with all that sweet caramel and peanuty goodness… golly, would I hate to be anyone who's not allowed to eat right now," he slyly broke off another piece between his teeth as he eyed Rayne.

She mutedly worked her jaw for a moment. Then in a dangerously low voice, she said, "Sorry, Elsa, but I'm sending your boyfriend to an early grave."

"Please don't. I'm actually rather fond of the little troublemaker," I snorted as I made my way over to him, quick to smother his mouth with my hand even as he opened it to spout off something else that would surely only tighten the proverbial noose even further around his neck.

I anticipated the little kiss he pressed to the inside of his palm. What I didn't anticipate, however, was him simply taking hold of my wrist and yanking my down into his lap (a rather awkward seat, mind you, considering I was sharing the space with all that candy) where he hugged me tightly, pinning my arms to my sides in the process so I could no longer silence him. Nuzzling his nose to my cheek, he then turned his head to regard Rayne once more as he chirped, "Just consider it incentive! Think about it: the sooner ya squeeze that kiddo out, the sooner ya get to throttle me! Now lessee here, where was I…"

Releasing his hold on me, he retrieved another bar from the heap, tore it open and chomped down. "Mmm… Almond Joy? More like Almond Nirvana! Seriously, this is too good. Raindrop, wanna bite?" he held it out towards her, giving it a little wiggle with an impish gleam to his eyes.

Pretty sure I could see a vein bulging on her forehead for a split second. Then she tried to lunge straight for him and it was only thanks to the combined efforts of Riku, Kairi, and Sora holding her back that she stayed put in her bed.

It seemed Lea was playing his part a little too well.

"Lemme at him, I'm going to murder him!" she snarled as she fought against all the hands restraining her.

"Ah-ah," Lea waggled a finger at her - a finger I hastily grabbed and forced him to lower in a futile attempt to keep him from antagonizing her further. "What did I just tell ya? Baby first, then murder."

Rayne's lips parted, a particularly nasty retort surely on the tip of her tongue, but then she sucked in a sharp breath through her teeth as it appeared another contraction wracked her body and she bellowed out wordlessly instead.

As if her howl was a summons, a new person suddenly came bustling into the room with a chipper yet soothing, "Hello, I am Baymax, your personal healthcare companion."

Mind you, I was using the term "person" in the loosest sense of the word. Baymax here was actually a robot of some kind, though a rather odd one at that - I usually didn't picture robots as big, round, soft and inflatable. Then again, this was the first robot I'd ever met, so what did I know? It seemed it (he?) was some sort of prototype on loan to the hospital, making rounds in the role of a nurse as a sort of a test run to see how viable mass producing more like it (him?) might be.

The future is now, apparently.

"Yes, yes, so you keep saying every. Damn. Time that you come in here," Rayne panted out in reply to the bot, her grip firmly squeezing Riku's hand once more.

"On a scale of one to ten, how would you rate your pain?" Baymax asked amiably as he began to lift her blankets to check how far along she was while the rest of us discreetly averted our eyes.

She huffed out a bitter noise that may have been some crude approximation of a laugh. "Trust me, we left ten in the dust hours ago."

"Good news" Baymax announced, still in that mellow yet upbeat tone he seemed to be programmed to never deviate from as he settled her bedsheets back into place. "You are dilated enough now to begin the birthing process. I'll page Dr Finkelstein so we can get started right away."

"Oh thank fucking god!" Rayne cried out.

Baymax turned to address the rest of us, "If everyone besides the father-to-be could please vacate the room and give us privacy, it would be most appreciated. Thank you and have a nice day."

As the rest of us quickly filed out of the room into the hall, I could spot Anna turning a corner down the way, her arms bursting with blankets now as she sprinted at full speed. Her gaze widened slightly when it landed on us and as she skidded to a halt, she asked, "What's going on? What happened?"

"I did it!" Lea chuckled triumphantly as he handed her a Butterfingers, which she bemusedly accepted. "I shit you not, I actually did it! I managed to annoy that baby outta her!"

"Huh. We really would make a cute lil anklebiter, wouldn't we?"

I blinked, taking my eyes off my phone screen to glance down at Lea instead. "...pardon?"

The two of us had laid claim to a row of chairs in the waiting room that were sans armrests and pushed together to form a makeshift bench of sorts. I was currently seated in one on the end with Lea sprawled out across the rest of them, using my lap to pillow his head. Looking up from his own phone, he showed me his screen. "Got curious and put our photos in one o' those 'what'll our baby look like' websites. Just lookit this adorable lil fucker."

I was greeted with the sight of a computer-generated yet still rather life-like picture of a little boy. He had short hair that was platinum blonde like mine, as well as my blue eyes, but favored Lea's more sharp angular facial features, especially in the nose. "He is rather cute," I grinned, one hand pocketing my mobile while the other gently stroked his wild hair. Nibbling on my bottom lip, I hesitated for a heartbeat. Then, "...what brought this up?"

Retracting his arm and turning his phone back towards himself so he could stare at the picture once more, he shrugged. "I dunno… Raindrop and Riku's lil squirt's gonna be here any minute… Mom made that comment 'bout the two of us making a kid…" He paused and shrugged again. "Hard not to get curious what with all that baby fever going round right now, I s'pose."

"You think about that kind of stuff?" I tipped my head to one side, my finger idly singling out one of his crimson spikes to fiddle with in particular. "You want children?"

"Well yeah," he laughed, tucking his phone away as he sat up, now only occupying the seat beside me. Grinning sheepishly as he rubbed at the nape of his neck, he added, "Not anytime soon, of course. But one day somewhere down the road with the right person? Definitely."

The corners of my eyes crinkled. There was absolutely zero doubt in my mind that Lea would make an amazing father some day. His words did sort of beg a certain kind of question however. One that I wasn't really sure I was ready to hear the answer to one way or another. Still, as I lowered my gaze to where my hands were fidgeting together in my lap, my face warmed as I couldn't seem to help but ask, "And do you… see me as the right person?"

Lea reached over, engulfing one of my hands in his and weaving our fingers together, rubbing his thumb over my knuckles. I lifted my gaze to meet his and he smiled softly, "Maybe… yeah, I'd really… really like to think you could be." He used his free hand to tentatively sweep some of my bangs behind my ear, his palm lingering against my cheek. "...is that okay, El?" he murmured.

He was worried his answer might freak me out, make me feel pressured. And to be fair, it was the type of thing that probably normally would have. However, it wasn't a cold panic I felt seeping into my chest now, but rather a pleasant tingle, tiny but warm. I leaned into his hand, covering his fingers with my own as one corner of my lips turned up and I gave a small nod, maybe surprising us both a little bit as I whispered back, "Yeah, that's okay."

His grin stretched to the point of threatening to split his face in two. Then he leaned down to kiss me soundly, resting his forehead against mine after he drew back.

Personally, I'd never before really pictured children in my future. Not that I had seen myself not having any, but I hadn't particularly seen myself having them either. It just hadn't really been something I'd thought much about, to be honest. And it didn't help that like I said, the whole process of childbirth made me a bit squeamish. But now… thinking about the prospect of maybe one day having them with Lea…

...sounded like it might be nice.

But that was still years and years and years away, trust me.

Still… it was a pleasant possible future to think about.

A deep yawn suddenly overtook Lea and he gave a massive stretch before slouching further down into his seat, slinging an arm around my shoulders and tugging me into his side. "Yeesh, it's been almost two hours now, what is taking that kid so damn long? I've heard of showing up fashionably late, but baby girl is really pushing it."

His yawn was contagious for I found myself doing the same as I reached for his hand. Absently toying with his fingers, I hummed a tiny laugh, "Maybe she stopped to pick up a latte on her way here."

"Well then, that kiddo better come outta Raindrop with a cardboard to-go tray bearing enough coffee for everyone."

I smiled drowsily, but made no response. Seated across from us, I could see my sister cozied up with Kristoff in another pair of seats, quietly chatting and giggling. As for Sora and Kairi, they were off grabbing a bite in the cafeteria. We'd decided to go in shifts so that there would always be someone in the waiting room in case news came at long last. Lea and I had been the first pair to go, with Kairi and Sora being the last.

As the hospital speakers paged a Dr Sweet to report to surgery, Lea piped up again, "Ya know, a lil caffeine infusion might not be a bad idea. The hospital coffee here is shit, may as well be piss for all the good it does. Once the kid's made her grand debut at long last and we can finally split, I was originally thinking we'd head back to my place to catch some Z's. But how 'bout instead we swing by Lucky Cat for some quality bean juice so we can get a jumpstart on moving your stuff over?"

"Move my stuff?" My brow furrowed and I turned my head to look up at him. "...where's it going?"

Lea blinked owlishly at me. I blinked owlishly right back. "Didn't we…?" he began slowly, then groaned, rubbing his eyes with his thumb and forefinger. "Shit, I haven't actually brought that up to you yet, have I? Maybe I really do need that nap." His hand shifted down to scratch at his cheek now, "But c'mon now, El, think… the kid's almost here."

"Uh-huh," I nodded.

"And she's gonna need a place to sleep," he went on.

"Of course." Obviously. I wasn't exactly sure where he was going with this.

He looked at me pointedly. "...in a nursery."

I quirked an eyebrow. "Right." Still lost here.

His eyelids drooped. "Babe... your room's the nursery."

I just stared back at him blankly, not saying anything at first as my brain took a minute to churn over his words.

A rather long minute.

Give me a break, I'd been awake for close to thirty-four hours straight now.

But finally it clicked.

I gasped, "I need to move out!"

"There it is," he snorted, his hand rubbing my back.

"Crud, in all this flurry of baby chaos, that part completely slipped my mind." I was on my feet in an instant, hands wringing my braid as I began pacing back and forth. "Fudge, I'm entirely unprepared for this! What am I going to do? Where am I going to go?" I stopped momentarily, looking at Lea. He opened his mouth to respond, but I was already furiously pacing once more, muttering, "Well, not entirely unprepared. I of course knew this was coming, already had some of my things packed, been on the hunt for a new apartment, I have, I really have! You know I have!" Again I paused. Again his lips parted. Again, I resumed my patrolling without giving him a chance to speak, "But there's nothing lined up yet! Gah, the baby wasn't supposed to be due for weeks, I was supposed to have more time! But now there is no more time and… and…" I came to a halt once again, face hardening and shoulders squaring as I tapped the side of my fist into my palm with a firm nod. "Time to revisit the whole living in a box idea!"

Did I mention the whole thirty-four hours without sleep thing?

"Woah now, hang on! No one's gonna be living in a box," Lea hopped up with a chuckle, hands going to my shoulders and giving them a squeeze. "Doubt the new happy family would kick ya out just like that and make you homeless, they'd work something out for ya while you looked for a new home." Now his eyes darted to the left as he softly cleared his throat, "There's... another option though that, ya know... I'd like to think is slightly more appealing to all parties involved…"

I cocked my head. "There is?"

"Yeah." He took both my hands in his, holding them to his chest as he beamed, "Move in with me!"

"Move in with…" I echoed slowly, trailing off as I stared up at him.

Processing… processing…

I gasped again, "Oh no! No, we shouldn't- That's isn't- I couldn't possibly do that!"

"Aw, why not?" he pouted.

"Moving in together is a big step, Lea! A huge decision! One we definitely shouldn't be making spur of the moment like this, not to mention when we're both delirious from lack of sleep! There's so much to consider, so much to think about!"

He used the hold he still had on my hands to pull me to him and wrap my arms around his waist, freeing up his own arms to hug me instead. "What's there to think about? You're already practically living with me anyhow, you stay over almost every night as it is. I'd love to have you there, Bruni and Marshmallow would love to have you there… it's three against one, El, you're outvoted."

I drooped my eyelids up at him. "The dog and salamander don't get votes."

"You'll hafta take that up with them once you're all moved in and settled," he pressed a quick peck to my forehead before flashing a cheeky grin. My expression remained unamused and he snerked, "C'mon, is it really such a big deal? We were just talking 'bout having kids. Compared to that, the idea of shacking up together seems like small potatoes!"

"Yes, theoretical kids in a theoretical future. Me moving in with you is very real and very right now. We haven't even been dating for five months yet, that's way too soon to be living together."

Lea shrugged, "And you were with your ex for five years before almost tying the knot with him and we all know how that ended. Who's to say what's too soon and what isn't? All we can do is what feels right, and this feels right… doesn't it?"

...it actually kind of did.

Damn him, it did.

It didn't help that those beautiful green puppy eyes of his were murder on my resolve.

But my stubbornness flared and I hastily looked away. I wasn't ready to relent just yet and I weakly scrambled to maintain my defense, "But… it's just too soon, Lea. It hasn't even been a year yet, we haven't even… celebrated all the big holidays yet!"

Even as I blurted it out, it sounded lame even to me.

But it was the best I could come up with, dammit!

His eyebrows reached for his hairline and he fought a tiny smile. "...so just to be clear here, it's important to you that we observe all the major holidays in a calendar year together before making any further life-changing decisions."

I hitched my chin with a lofty little sniff. "Yes. Yes it is."

This was the hill was I choosing to die on, apparently.

"Duly noted," he glanced towards the ceiling with a tiny shake of his head before settling his gaze on me once more, eyes crinkling. "Fine, let's not call it moving in together then, call it… a temporary solution."

"...temporary?" I turned my head slightly, giving him some dubious side-eye.

"Mm-hm! Face it, babydoll, even though we both know Raindrop and Riku will be more than happy to accommodate ya, it's still gonna be a tight squeeze with all four of you in that tiny ass apartment while you're searching for a place. Wouldn't it just be more convenient for everyone if temporarily," he reiterated for emphasis, "you stayed with me instead just until you've found your new home? You know there's more than enough space for you and your things at my digs."

I tucked in my bottom lip. Maybe it was the sleep deprivation talking, but darn it, he actually seemed to be making a lot of sense. Still, I hesitated. "...I don't know what to say."

His eyes lit up. Great. Now the big dork knew he was winning. Hugging me more tightly to him, he grinned, "That's simple: say yes."

I squinted up to him, pursing my lips to the left. Then to the right. Then, just as I was slowly opening my mouth to speak-

-a throat suddenly cleared nearby.

Like, really nearby.

Both Lea and I tensed before turning our heads to discover none other than Saïx standing not two inches away from us looking quite perturbed.

To be fair, Saïx usually looked perturbed. It just seemed to be his face's default setting. But this was more perturbed than usual.

Lea quirked an eyebrow at him, but grinned, "Hey, big guy! Ya mind? Kinda in the middle of something here."

"And I do so hate to interrupt, truly," he said flatly, his cold unblinking gaze locked on his brother, "but I fear we have a rather pressing matter to discuss that cannot wait."

His eyebrows knit together. "...which would be?"

Saïx's hard stare was unyielding. "Do you think there is quite possibly something you may have forgot back at our mother's house?"

Cocking his head, Lea seemed even more genuinely confused now. Clearly racking his brain for a couple seconds, he then shrugged with a small shake of his head, "Like what?"

"ME, you DOLT!" Saïx snarled, slugging Lea in the shoulder hard enough to force a pained grunt out of him.

I inhaled sharply through my nose, eyes widening.

There was no way we'd actually-

We couldn't have honestly-

We didn't-

...did we really?

I thought back to yesterday, though it was a struggle to remember a clear picture through the fog of grogginess. Had Saïx been in the car with us on the trip back? Had he not? Try as I might, I just simply could not remember one way or another. But I suppose it could be (and in fact was) completely possible, especially considering Lea had had Saïx's car keys and I had had his code to start the engine.

In our state of panic and rush to get out of there, had we really just totally spaced on the fact that we didn't have him with us?

"Oh gosh, Saïx, I'm so sorry we left you behind!" I bemoaned in horror.

Lea laughed, "Relax, El, don'tcha know that with me as your boyfriend, that makes everything my fault? You're off the hook, I'm the only one he's mad at."

"He's right, I don't blame you at all." Although Saïx was talking to me, his irked gaze never left Lea. "You're not the one who forgot your own brother."

No, I just simply forgot a whole person. For a whole car ride. In his own friggin' car.

Elsa, Queen of Memory Lapse.

"Bah, I didn't forget ya, I just… thought you were in the backseat the entire time being really quiet!"

That earned Lea another punch to the arm.

Giving an annoyed huff as he rubbed his knuckles, Saïx asked with a bit less bite to his tone now, "I presume since I find you all still here at the hospital, the child has yet to be born?" At our silent nods, he moved to the nearest set of empty chairs and sat down with a soft huff, crossing his arms.

Huh. Guess he was going to join us for sharing Rayne's and Riku's joy in this blessed event.

I gingerly took a seat next to him, Lea plopping down in the chair on my other side. As his arm wrapped around my shoulders, he piped up with a huge smile, "Got some good news that I think'll clear up that black rain cloud hanging over your head there, Mr Grumps McSourpuss: El's moving in with us!"

My back stiffened and I whipped my head around to narrow my eyes up at him, "I haven't said yes yet."

Saïx was eyeing me oddly from the corner of his peripheral. "...you mean you weren't already living with us?"

"There ya have it! Saïx's official stamp of approval! Now ya gotta say yes," Lea beamed, smoothing his hand up and down my arm.

My eyelids drooped. "...one, in what universe was that even remotely a stamp of approval? And two, no, I don't 'gotta' do anything, least of all say yes."

"But you will," he winked at me, pressing a kiss to my cheek. Then he was looking past me towards Saïx once more, a thoughtful frown twisting his lips. "Hey… since we jacked your wheels, how'd you even get back here?"

Saïx fixed him with a dull stare. Then he shifted his crossed arms more tightly against his chest, closed his eyes and hitched his chin. "...wouldn't you like to know."

Lea snerked. "I would in fact, thus why I asked."

"What's that inanely childish saying you do so love to spout of? ...that's for me to know and you to find out?"

"C'mon, man," he groaned out. "This is gonna bug the crap outta me now until ya tell me."

One corner of his lips cruelly curled up. "I know."

Apparently, Saïx was swift to enact his vengeance when the need arose.

A tiny scowl emerged on my boyfriend's face, but before he could shoot off whatever acerbic retort he undoubtedly already had locked and loaded, I stopped him with a touch to his arm as I said, "Lea." He glanced down at me and I nodded towards the far corner of the waiting room. "Look."

He followed my gaze to a familiar woman with silver hair pulled back into a ponytail made of several tiny braids and the same green eyes as Lea. Aranea apparently was not aware that we had just noticed her, for she was too busy inspecting the selection available over at the hospital's coffee station with her nose wrinkled.

"Ah," Lea breathed, gracing his brother with a mildly sour look. "That's how ya got back. Ya bummed a ride outta our old lady."

Saïx said nothing, just continued to stare stoically straight ahead.

Blowing out a breath that made his lips flap, Lea turned his eyes towards his mother once more. A heartbeat of hesitation. Then making a sound that was half growl, half sigh, Lea muttered. "Be right back. Ma and I have some unfinished business." I smiled softly as he planted a smooch to my temple and I gave his hand a quick squeeze before releasing it as he stood up.

I watched Aranea perk up as she spotted Lea approaching. They exchanged a few words that I was too far away to hear, her grinning the whole time, him ruffling his fingers through his hair as he shifted his weight from one foot to the other. Then it seemed they decided to find somewhere else to have their talk for they then walked out of the waiting room.

Off to a good start at least, it seemed. Letting go a tiny exhale of relief, I glanced over at the chairs across from us once more to where Anna sat as I considered possibly shifting over to a seat near her. But seeing as she was currently otherwise, er… occupied with, hrm… inspecting Kristoff's tonsils with her tongue, I decided against it.

Ugh, gross, I did not need to see that.

Instead, I turned my attention to Saïx. My lips parted and I took in a breath to say something, but then I hesitated and clamped my mouth shut, staring down at where I was fiddling with my fingers in my lap. Then I cleared my throat, looked over at him once more and tried again, "Would it... really be okay with you if… if I decided to move in?"

His eyes flicked over to me briefly without turning his head. Then releasing a nearly inaudible sigh through his nose, he stared straight forward once again. "I consider you among a small, select handful of people I can tolerate and would even go so far as to say enjoy the company of. If my asinine fool of a brother has against all odds actually managed to persuade you somehow into agreeing to move in with him, then by all means, your presence on a more permanent basis could only be a considerable improvement on our day-to-day lives around the apartment." He paused and for a second it seemed that was all he had to say on the subject. Then then added a bit more quietly, "Besides, you make my brother happy. Far be it from me to stand in the way of that, even if I wanted to."

A small smile tugged at my lips. "...he makes me happy too."

Saïx gave a low hmph at that, closing his eyes. "I would hope so. Otherwise, what would be the point?"

On that note, the conversation ended. As he seemed more than content to remain in a companionable silence, I reached over the seat Lea had vacated and towards the little table on the other side, plucking up one of the outdated magazines provided by the hospital from it and slowly began flipping through its pages.

A short while later, I heard a door opening and I glanced up to see that Lea and Aranea were walking back into the waiting room. Neither one looked like they wanted to murder each other, so I took that as a good sign. In fact, they almost, almost seemed somewhat chummy.

I set the periodical aside and both Saïx and I rose as they approached, which prompted a chuckle from Aranea, "No need to get up, I'm not staying. Just wanted to give my other knucklehead kid one last hug before hitting the road," she embraced Saïx, which he accepted as stony-faced as ever. Then she turned to me with a sly little smirk, "Plus I hear congrats are in order."

My eyes blinked. "...they are?"

"Course! You two lil lovebirds are gonna be living together soon, after all!"

I twitched, then shot Lea a flat look. "I haven't said yes yet."

He grinned, stepping closer to take my hand and bring it up to his lips. "Key word there: yet."

Oh-ho, he thought he was being cute. Even as I opened my mouth to prove just how wrong he was however, Aranea suddenly snagged me into a bone-crushing bear hug as she chirped, "Take care, shortcake!" She gave me one final squeeze before releasing me to rest a hand on my shoulder, "And if either of my boys give you any trouble, you gimme a call, I'll be only too happy to knock some sense into 'em!"

Smiling, I nodded, "Thanks, I'll be sure to do that. Have a safe trip back."

Lea received a hug from her as well and though he returned it stiffly, it was remarkably warmer than the one they'd shared yesterday in the foyer of her home. With that, she made her way towards the exit, waving goodbye to us over her shoulder before disappearing through the door.

"I take it you two are getting along now," I said to Lea as I settled into my chair once again.

He took a seat too, stretching his arm out along the backrest behind my head. As his fingers began to idly toy with my braid, he pursed his lips to one side in thought. Then, "Ya know how you and your folks 'get along' now?" he brought up his other hand to form air quotes. At my nod, he said, "Well, it's kinda like that. We're… gonna work on it."

I reached for his hands, lacing our fingers together as I told him gently, "I'm glad you decided to give her a chance."

"I think I am too," he admitted, albeit somewhat begrudgingly.

Just then, the same door Aranea had left through opened once more, Sora and Kairi being the ones to step through this time, laughing over something they'd been talking about. It seemed their timing was impeccable, for that was also when the double doors on the other side of the room parted and in walked a very familiar white, inflatable robot. All of us immediately zeroed in on him and were on our feet in an flash as he greeted us with, "Hello, I am Baymax, your personal healthc-"

"Yeah, yeah, we know all that already, get to the good part, you giant balloon!" Anna hastily cut him off, rolling her eyes. "Do you actually have anything new to tell us? How's Ray-Ray doing?"

"The delivery was a success," Baymax announced, managing to sound almost pleased somehow despite there being no actual change in the mechanical tone of his voice. "Everyone is happy and healthy. The new family is ready to accept visitors and have welcomed you all back to their room."

There was a mixture of whoops and relieved sighs all around before all of us, Saïx included, followed the robot as he led the way past those doors and towards the maternity ward. Not a minute later found us all crowding back into their hospital room. I spotted Riku first at his wife's bedside, facing her so his back was to us. As for Rayne, she looked absolutely exhausted and like she'd been to hell and back twice, but she positively radiated pure joy and love for the little bundle I could now see her holding in her arms. As she looked up at our entrance, she proudly beamed and said, "Everyone… I'd like you to meet Aria."

"...and Cayde," Riku added, smirking as he turned around to reveal he was cradling a second baby.

"TWO?!" Lea gaped, wide-eyed gaze darting back and forth between them while the rest of us were too stunned to even speak.

"That's right! Two!" Rayne chirped in delight.

Sora was the next one to find his voice, only to blurt out, "Twins?!"

"No, we liked the first one so much, we decided to randomly steal a second one from one of the other cribs when no one was looking," Riku deadpanned before snorting with a shake of his head. "Of course they're twins, doofus."

"But you never said anything about twins," Anna was already adopting a baby voice as she approached Riku, wasting no time making funny faces at Cayde.

Gently rocking little Aria as Rayne watched her fondly, she said, "We didn't know. No one did, not until Cayde shocked us all by showing up hot on the heels of his big sis. Guess the doctors missed him during all those check-ups and sonograms somehow."

"How do they miss a whole other baby inside of you for months?!" Kristoff shook his head in disbelief.

"Who knows, but it's not unheard of. We're not the first couple this has ever happened to." Glancing over to Cayde, Rayne grinned as she reached out a fingertip to tickle the underside of one of his tiny feet. "...he was a surprise, that's for sure, but a happy one."

"I'll say!" Kairi giggled, stepping forward to gently squish Aria's cheeks as she cooed, "This just gives Auntie Kairi and Unkie Sora twice the niblings to wub, doesn't it? Doesn't it? Yes it does!"

"Speaking of which… Kristoff." The man in question stood up straighter as Rayne suddenly locked eyes with him and told him in no uncertain terms, "We're gonna need a second reindeer."

He dragged a hand down the side of his face and sighed. "...I'll talk to Frozone."

Rayne crinkled her nose as she hummed a soft laugh, then her eyes landed on me as I approached her bedside. "Oh, Elsa, there was something I… we," she amended, exchanging a glance and a tiny nod with her husband, "wanted to talk to you about… we'd absolutely love it if you'd be the twins' godmother."

The finger I was waggling at Aria froze as my gaze widened and snapped up to meet hers. "Who, me? Really?" By the look in both the new parents' eyes, they were serious. Dead serious. "Oh! Why, uh… yes. Yes of course! I'd be very honored," I smiled.

"And Sora," Riku chimed in now, causing his cousin to pause mid-sticking his tongue out and crossing his eyes at Cayde. "We were hoping you'd be their godfather."

Sora blinded us all with his signature huge, thousand-watt grin. "Absolutely! I'm gonna make the best godfather ever, you'll see! I- wait…" His brow furrowed and he gasped, whipping his head around towards me now with a slight look of panic. "Does… does that make us... god-married?"

"Yes. It does."

And who was it, one might wonder, to deliver that answer in full earnest and with a completely straight face?

Saïx.

That's right. Saïx.

Which is probably why Sora took him at his word and didn't even think to question it. Nostrils flaring and with a steely look of determination now, he informed Lea, "I promise to take good care of her."

Not missing a beat, Lea nodded firmly, "You better, lil man, otherwise I will end you."

I elbowed my boyfriend in the gut, forcing a wheeze out of him. As everyone else sniggered around us, I sighed, "No, Sora, that doesn't make us god-married, it doesn't make us god-anything."

"Oh good! Whew!"

At that point, conversation for the most part subsided in favor of everyone trying to squeeze in to fawn over the new babies. After a minute of this, I decided to take the opportunity to snag Lea (dragging him away from playing with Aria's "widdle toesy-wosies" - his words, not mine) and pull him off to one side of the room away from the others. They hardly even noticed us stepping away, so enamored were they all with the little ones.

I faced him, holding both his hands in mine as I took in a deep breath and released it before uttering a single word. "Yes."

His face immediately lit up, but he quickly schooled his expression and cleared his throat, asking casually, "Yes? Yes what?"

Ugh, he knew very damn well what, he just wanted to hear me say it. Rolling my eyes but unable to fight a small grin, I said, "Yes, I'll move in with you. It just makes sense, after all, now that they have twins, there's even less room for me in their apartment and-"

I didn't get to finish that sentence as he smiled fiercely and grabbed my face, planting a firm kiss to my lips before laughing as he hugged me, picked me up and spun me around.

"Temporarily," I insisted, arms instinctively latching around his neck to steady myself.

"Yeah, yeah, of course, temporarily," he agreed, putting me down while still grinning like an idiot.

I poked his chest a couple times, "I mean it. I'm going to keep looking for my own place and the second I find something, I'm moving right back out."

"Whatever ya say, babydoll!"

Funny thing is though…

...I never did end up actually moving out.

Author's Note: MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY HOLIDAYS! Hope you all enjoyed the millions of teeny references I sprinkled in - my aesthetic, as I'm sure you're all aware at this point xP (My fave was something Lea said towards the very end, did you guys catch that it was a reference? I hope so :3) Regarding Sora's lil stand-up comedy act, I unfortunately cannot take credit for any of his material - I just googled a bunch of Final Fantasy jokes xD I can't even take credit for the cactuar jokes for even tho I couldn't find any ACTUAL cactuar jokes out there on the internet, I just googled cactus jokes instead xD And yes, there are IN FACT cactus jokes out there, and a LOT of them lawl! And woo, Lea and his mom made up… sort of! xD Sorry that happened off screen, part of it was I thought it wasn't a conversation that Elsa would really be present for, part of it was I didn't want to take focus off the main points of this chapter, and part of it was I was just too lazy to write it at this time xD Maybe I'll go back at a later date and write a Lea POV chapter for this lil chat with his mum, we'll see! But for now, at least we got a lil closure on that front! And aaaaahhhhh, our ice and fire bbies are taking a big step and moving in together, yaaaaaay! :3 I knew that was definitely a relationship milestone I wanted to cover in one of these bonus chapters and this just seemed like a fun way to bring it about xD

The next one-shot is set during Christmas time! Which I know, lil late, should have posted it today xD But I'd kinda locked myself into the baby chapter with the way the last chapter ended and the babies are born in September, so couldn't combine them into one chapter xD So consider next week's update just a bit of a belated Christmas present! And I'll say this about the next bonus chapter: It's gonna be pure crack xD Trust me, there will be no substance whatsoever, it's just mindless silliness and slightly scandalous and mildly salacious (but still 100% family friendly… ish... haha!). Basically, if PG horny hijinx doesn't interest you, you might wanna skip the next chapter xD You've been warned!

Thanks for reading, I super duper appreciate it! And an extra BIG thank you to those of you who’ve liked, reblogged, and followed so far, seeing those lil notifications always brings the biggest, goofiest smile to my face!

FIRST CHAPTER || PREVIOUS CHAPTER || NEXT CHAPTER

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art-of-androgyny · 3 years ago

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If you get this, answer with 3 random facts about yourself and send it to the last 7 blogs (no pressure!!) in your notifications, anonymously or not! Let’s get to know the person behind the blog!

ok let’s seeee

1 - i have this really bad mosquito bite gods it’s so itchy and it hurts on my leg and it’s swelled up to the size of my thumb

2 - (*thinks hard* i’m not all that interesting guys) i have a seal stuffed animal named lord wiggy the 28th of the seven seals

3 - i have a vast collection of purses to hold my epi pen whenever i go out

#^u^#eldritch friend #aerik tries to give a satisfactory answer #mutual tag

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frisky-firestarter · 4 years ago

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if you're taking drabble suggestions, willowfrid with Willow getting happily reminded who's in charge?

Ngl I was supposed to write this yesterday and then I totally forgot.

“Stupid Wilson, stupid napsack, stupid ‘oh if it works you’ll only be out for a minute tops’—Well, Mr. Science Man! Be your own Guinean pig next time! Make yourself late to go see your girlfriend.” It’s not like cancelling plans was so easy when you couldn’t send a telegram or carrier pigeon or whatever people who were social enough to have friends at home did to take a rain check.

So she was in the dark with her lighter, trudging her way to Wigfrid’s and trying to rub the remaining sleep from her eyes.

“Shoot...Was it east from...No.” Willow wrangled with her nap while she tried to keep her lighter on. “This isn’t nearly so fun a trip in the dark. I’m going to trip on a rock and die before I ever see my girlfriend, and Wilson is going to be responsible for resurrecting me. I’m gonna—“

She was silenced by the strong hands, not immediately recognizable as Wigfrid’s. Willow was shocked quiet for a solid second.

“I have caught thee, sweet, little rabbit.”

She was scooped up in her arms bridal-style with a squeak. “Don’t call me a rabbit. Rabbits are just tasty vermin.”

“Well, you’re one of those things~”

“Wigfrid! No, I wanna be...a catcoon. I’m a sweet, little catcoon.”

“Oh, but dear thing, I’m supposed to be the hunter here.” She carried her into the sturdy, stone walls of her camp. It’s hadn’t been far, thank goodness, a good twenty feet away. So Willow didn’t have to scold her for running off into the dark just to catch her by surprise. The campfire roared in the center, and Willow’s eyes stuck to it before she was hauled off to her tent.

“No buts! I wanna be a kitty.”

“Fine, the I shall be the hellish spawn of Fenrir! A hound that has tracked thee down for my own nefarious purposes. How lucky you are that I let you be a cat when you’ve done me the horrid injustice of being late.” Wigfrid laid her out over the plentiful furs and pelts she had collected during her time on the Constant.

“Sorry, I got held up helping Wilson out, and you know he can get—“

“Hush, a mere apology will not offer the reparations I seek this dark night.” Willow gasped as her hands slid up her blouse to unhook the corset. “I think you need to be reminded that you’re mine. Not Wilson’s.” Hooks undone, Wigfrid reached where the fabric parted to drag her nails over her spine.

“Yes ma’am,” she giggled. If Willow had the wherewithal to walk tomorrow, she knew she’d have to wear something around her neck. She did not mind.

“Little cat, caught under my paw, I will make you regret the poor decisions that have led you to my terrible jaws.”

“Oh cruel fate!” Willow half squealed. Wigfrid pulled her hair hard to the side to gain more access to her neck and shoulder. Her blouse was gone before she even knew it, leaving her helpless against the ensuing assault of kissing and biting along her bare skin. “To be stuck here, devoured by some mean, old hound.”

“Old!” Wigfrid returned to her flesh to leave a mark that would certainly stick with her for days. “What am I, two...three years older than you?”

“Yeah. Old.”

“Oh, a sweet kitty with an apparent deathwish.” Wigfrid scooted back between her legs, wiggled her leggings down, tilted her body to the side. Then she smacked her haunch. Willow’s back arched away with a sharp gasp. “You’ll take it back, won’t you?” Smack. “I promise…” Smack. “You’ll see no relief until I get an apology.”

Each blow was just hard enough to leave a fat, red handprint. Willow took it as long as she was physically able, until the sting burned her read too much to stand. “A-alright! I’m sorry! I take it back!”

“Aw, my darling kitten is ‘sorry’. Perhaps I can ease up on your torment, if only slightly.” Wigfrid affectionately rubbed circles around the sore spot, then she hauled her legs up to drape over her shoulders. “I won’t torture thee with the wait anymore. No, I’ll cut to the chase and devour you whole right now!”

That arousing pain had left her red in the face and panting. “Whatever will I do! Oh no! Oh...yes…”

She had pushed aside the crotch of her briefs to thumb over Willow’s soaking folds. “By Freya, you are far too easy to work up. Not that I mind.”

“Hush! It’s not my fault you’re so good with me. Hurry up...I’m gonna lose it at this rate.”

“Well, now I’m going to take all night just to spite you.”

“Wiggy! I thought you wanted to devour me now!”

“Such a brat!” She gently pulled back the hood over her clit, leaving the sensitive, little button exposed to the open air. “You are right, though. I may be a hungry beast, but I could never leave you waiting…”

#don’t thirst #asks

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uwigs · 4 years ago

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Beginners Tips To Make Lace Wigs Like Real Hair!

Hi there, we are UWigs. Today, we will tell you the truth about lace wig customization and how to get your lace wig to look like it's growing from your scalp in this blog!

1.Plucking

The first thing that we can do to make the hairline look natural is to pluck it. It ruins the lace wig because it can cause a little bit more shedding. However, it gives a natural hairline. We all know that plucking any hair out of the lace wig is a sure way to cause shedding and also ruin the lace wig. Nonetheless, it is a great thing to do, because we want the lace wig to look very realistic, we don't want it to look bulky and thick, just like a wig, we want it to look like our natural hair, so we need to tweeze out some hairs from the lace wig to make it look realistic.

The goal of plucking wig is to create a natural look, so not tweezing too long in one section, and make sure that taking small sections of hair at a time. Of course, we're going to lose some hair, which is expected. One rule of thumb is that when it comes to plucking, how much we pull with tweezers depends on the density of the lace wigs. So please pay attention to the densities, make sure that not over-plucking, because we don't want to mess it up, if we do it right, we will lose some hair, but we will get a lace wig with a very natural look at the end.

Conclusion: pluck takes away bulky density to reveal a natural look, but it will increase shed hair.

2.Heat

As we all know, when it comes to curly hair and heat, it will damage our hair. Whereas, when it comes to the lace wigs, we can afford to take a little bit of damage. Like Hot combs, it will help us make the lace wigs flat and give a more natural appearance.

While the hot comb can apply some heat damage, but to be honest, unless it's extremely hot and it burns some hair out, but this is the temp of heat that we want to use on the lace wigs because it's going to lay that area that we're parting or the hairline down and make it look less wiggy.

It is an important step that you do not want to miss out. If you want your wig to look realistic now, of course, you only use the hot comb at the roots of the hair, but you never want to take it throughout the whole hair. And keep that in mind and make sure you are using some types of wax stick or hairspray to at least give the hair a little bit of protection.

Conclusion: heat help will help to lay the lace wigs flat and give a more natural appearance but can cause heat damage over time.

3.Makeup

Adding foundation to the inside of the cap does stain the lace, but it will make your wig lace look like the scalp. So whether you're applying foundation, or the perfect line Swiss, or even a fake scalp insert, you're doing a little bit of damage to the lace wigs, but once you have done all of them, it's time to see how realistic your wig looks.

Conclusion: lace tint helps make the lace color and melt and match the skin tone but can cause lace quality to worn and strained over time.

If you need a lace wig, UWigs will be your best choice! We are a professional wig site for human hair wigs. UWigs not only provides hair products but also shares the knowledge of human hair wigs. If you want to know more about human hair wigs, please remember uwigs.com!

#uwigs #human hair wigs #lace wigs #lace front wigs #beginner #wig install

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watusichris · 7 years ago

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Replacements, 1st Time Around

In 1983, the Replacements hit Los Angeles for the first time. I followed them around for a week or two. This story, from the Dec. 2, 1983 issue of the Los Angeles Reader, is being posted in acknowledgement of the band’s splendid live album “For Sale,” which is being released on Friday by Rhino and is utterly tremendous. ********** During a Midwestern winter, when the seasonal temperatures gravitate toward the arctic, a rock ‘n’ roll band has to play hard just to stay warm. Judging from the rather limp records that emanate from the region, there are a lot of frozen butts in the heart of the nation. Midwestern rock hasn’t had much to offer since the garage-band heyday of Chicago’s Shadows of Knight and Minneapolis’ Litter, besides the pre-punk spasms of the MC5 and the Stooges.

Last week, though, a Minneapolis band pulled through L.A. and proved that there’s no energy crisis in their particular basement. The Replacements knocked out four superior sets of go-for-the-throat rock ‘n’ roll in the local clubs. I’ll borrow one of their song-title catch phrases: Color me impressed.

The Replacements have been together since 1979. They’ve released three records’ worth of original material (two albums and an EP) that could blow Violent Femme Gordon Gano’s precious little gonads from here to Maine. After hearing them on vinyl and in concert, there’s no doubt as to who the true Kings of the Great White North are.

The records, all on the Twin Cities-based Twin/Tone label, are all raw, unmanicured productions that opt for scurvy power rather than flat professionalism. Sorry Ma, Forgot to Take Out the Trash, the debut album released in 1981, is a sort of song cycle of 18 tunes about cruising, partying, romance, dope, drunkenness, and the other senseless pursuits of adolescent Midwesterners. Its 1982 follow-up, The Replacements Stink, is a harder, louder eight-song EP that refines the first record’s sound into a murderous ball-peen screech. The latest LP, Hootenanny, is a lovably sloppy, diversely programmed collection incorporating blues, country, and folk elements hitherto unheard on the group’s recordings.

The great virtue of the Replacements’ records is a charming insouciance about polish, cleanliness, subtlety, taste, and other non-rock ‘n’ roll concerns. The band comes on like a disarming juvenile trash compacting of the pre-’66 Rolling Stones, the New York Dolls, the Stooges, the Sex Pistols, and the Ramones. Crudity, humor (much of it self-deprecating), velocity, and high volume are the hallmarks of the Replacements’ style. The Dolls are their most obvious role model: The ear-scraping abandon of Bob Stinson’s guitar recalls Johnny Thunders at his most frenetic, and vocalist Paul Westerberg’s drunken, hoarse warbling is comparable to the caterwauling of the pre-solo David Johansen.

Westerberg writes the lion’s share of the band’s material, and it is largely terrific stuff. He’s at his best when confronting the trials of Everykid, whether goofing off at the bus stop (“Hangin’ Downtown”), lusting after the girl who works at the corner store (“Customer’), lamenting the necessities of lower education (“Fuck School”), or confronting the idiocies of average teenage social behavior (“I Bought a Headache” and “Color Me Impressed”).

Though many of the numbers are smash ‘n’ snarl thrashers, there’s enough variety in the Replacements’ sound to keep them out of sticky-floored identipunk corners. Many of Westerberg’s most effective and affecting compositions are ballads – “Johnny’s Gonna Die” (a premature elegy for the graveyard-bound Johnny Thunders, on Sorry Ma), “Go” (on Stink), and “Willpower” (on Hootenanny). The group also shows an increasing affinity for inebriated blues and boogie; the standard mode of Midwestern barroom bashing is utilized to ironic effect in “White and Lazy” (which sounds remarkably like the Dolls’ boozy remake of Bo Diddley’s “Pills”) and “Take Me Down to the Hospital.” Westerberg is also reportedly a prolific writer of folkish solo material: This side of his style is reflected on record in the non-LP B side “If Only You were Lonely” and the caustic, basement-tapey self lampoon “Treatment Bound,” which concludes Hootenanny: “We’re getting’ noplace as fast as we can/We get a nose full from our so-called friends.”

This daffy catalog of styles, as well as some wonderfully blatant cops (everything from the Dragnet theme to “Frere Jacques,” “Oh Darling,” and “The Twist”), combines with Westerberg’s nose-thumbing take on dumb youth angst and the band’s flat-out, heated performance methodology to make for rock ‘n’ roll that is alert, aware, pointed, and funny. On their records (and I wouldn’t part with any one of them), the Replacments are unbeatable. Onstage, even when approaching the boundary line of chaos, they’re among the most special of live bands.

I don’t know where you suckers were last week, but the Replacements shows in L.A. were without exception under-attended. Well, you blew it, chumps, and don’t let it happen next time. This is a band that can knock you out of your Nikes even on the slowest and worst of nights, and they shouldn’t be missed.

Visually, they’re an unprepossessing lot. Paul Westerberg is an emaciated rail who looks like he rolled out of bed just before the gig; his sole concession to onstage fashion is some poorly applied eye makeup, which just emphasizes the beatness of his wardrobe (faded flannels and T-shirts and well-worn jeans) and the comatosity of his appearance. His face is perpetually creased by a knowing smirk; like Popeye, he speaks and sings out of the corner of his mouth.

Guitarist Bob Stinson is the group’s fashion plate: He usually plays in a polka-dotted skirt, or in his jockey shorts. The pocket of his blue denim jacket holds his toothbrush. His brother Tommy, the group’s bassist, and drummer Chris Mars are little babyfaces (the junior Stinson joined the group when he was 12). For all his youthful appearance, Mars possess a deadpan wit: Shortly after Kristine McKenna pegged him as a Yale student in the Times, Mars showed up on the Music Machine stage wearing a T-shirt hand-lettered in Magic Marker with “YAIL UNIVERSITY.”

“Loose” is a term that can be used to describe a typical Replacements set. Some songs do not so much end as break down in a clatter of drums and a squawk of feedback. Westerberg and the young Stinson are often to be found in conversation during a guitar solo. Blown key changes occur with regularity. The band is frankly casual about its performance demeanor. At the Music Machine last Wednesday, Tommy Stinson leaned over in midtune to grab a beer, and his bass immediately came both unplugged and unstrapped; he unhurriedly refitted himself, in time to pluck the last two notes of the song.

This is definitely a group who hold to their professed sub-professional standing (“The label wants a hit/But we don’t give a shit,” they sing in “Treatment Bound”), but their carelessness and blithe disregard for even the basics of showmanship never interfere with the impact of the show.

They heave their way through a set at eardrum-crushing volume, with Westerberg, his vocal cords ready to snap at any moment, screaming to be heard over the din. Bob Stinson’s Fender spits out withering clusters of spike-toned notes, underpinned by Westerberg’s brutishly loud rhythm guitar. And Tommy Stinson and Mars provide a relentless backup. As wiggy as the band can get, its musicianship is generally of the highest caliber.

They provide more than a few laughs, too. They’ll switch instruments to play the title track from Hootenanny. They’ll rock out on “The Marine Corps Hymn,” essay Hank Williams’ “Hey Good Lookin’” or T. Rex’s “Twentieth Century Boy,” or perform a country-and-western version of their “God Damn Job” (lyric: “I need a god damn job/I need a god damn job/God damn it/God damn it/God damn/ I need a god damn job”).

I got hooked on the Replacements’ energy and sharp-incisored humor at Club Lingerie two weeks ago, where, looking a bit singed from the road, they wowed some of the assembled waxworks with a ragged but involving set. I wound up following the group around town during the next few days. They did a sizzling marathon hour-and-a-quarter show at the Cathay de Grande on Monday night, and a tough, nutty, erratic one at the Music Machine on Wednesday.

Musically, they were at low ebb at their return Cathay engagement on Thanksgiving, but that set may have been the most revealing of all. The house was filled with Mohawked dolts panting for Social Distortion. The Replacements, who could easily have mowed their audience down with a show comprising their short, fierce, hardcore-styled tunes, instead opted for the opposite tack. They began the show with the blues shuffle “White and Lazy” and made their alienating way through every ballad, country tune, and slow number in their repertoire. The leftover turkeys in the crowd were gobbling as the set oozed its way to a conclusion, but it was the Replacements who were having the last laugh on the fashion-conscious ex-surfers in leather. As Tommy Stinson said in mock admiration, “Wow, punk rockers.”

Remember when punk rockers gave their audiences the raspberry (or worse), disassembled rigid expectations, and guffawed at the status quo? At the Cathay on Turkey Day, the Replacements proved something besides the fact that they are a great rock ‘n’ roll band. They proved that they may just be the last real punk band in America. Come back soon, guys – there are some other folks in this sleepy town who could use some waking- and wising-up.

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vannidajoaneblog · 7 years ago

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Aurora Province 2017

Off to Baler for the weekend :) My dad’s hometown. I never really grew up there, but every time I come for vacation, no doubt it feels like home. The last time I was there, it was during its quadricentennial celebration. I was with my grandfather who came home from the US. He was popularly known as “Ka Feliz” by a lot of people.

#Circa2009

It’s been awhile since the last time I’ve been to Aurora. It has fast become a tourist attraction - known as one of those surfing destinations in Luzon. Not to mention, the province also has its own enchanting natural wonders, historic spots and others. Despite all, it still remains quaint and pristine - the thing that I like most. It's a great rehab from the hustle and bustle of the concrete city.

GOING THERE

Genesis Transport Service schedules regular bus rides going to Baler. With only P600+, you can always take the regular. Or, if you want a more comfortable option to travel - slouch on a lazy boy with NO STOPOVERS - you can take the “Joybus,” a new line for a fare of P700+. It also has an onboard comfort room, free snacks served by a bus stewardess, free wifi, blanket & pillow and a good morning kit. Not bad for a 4-6 hour ride right? :) Me and my travel tribe-mate sister ate Iza took the 12:30 MN schedule. I easily fell asleep and next thing I knew, we were already at Ma. Aurora in just 4 and ½ hours. Just in time for the magnificent break of dawn.

BALER SUNRISE

Upon arriving at the bus station, there’s a queue of tricycle waiting. So it was very easy to find our way to the hotel, just simply had to tell the driver. We hurriedly took one because we didn’t want to miss the break of dawn at Sabang beach. Baler sunrise is very beautiful. Facing the Pacific ocean, it is a must to catch a glimpse of it. It is the best welcome to Baler after our touchdown :)

BAY-LER VIEW

Ate Iza Sanchez is writing for Bayler-View Hotel for this trip - you can check out her blogs for some travel tips & travelogues at www.takethetravel.com. One of the perks that we had is the free accommodation.

They have a very nice crew (being Tagalog.) Made sure we are happy all the time :) If you plan to choose this hotel, it is a thumbs-up because it’s just a few steps from the shore. You can just simply grab a surfboard (another free perk) and hit the waves - anytime. After getting settled, we did not waste time and immediately started our itinerary.

TRICYCLE

In Aurora, one thing that you will notice is that there are NO JEEPNEYS. No room for those belchers and the steam that comes out of it in Aurora :) It either tricycle or 4WD’s. For just P800 (or less than that if you are good at haggling,) you can go around visiting the different tourists spots that this province has to offer - Baler Church, Dona Aurora House, Museo de Baler, Ermita Hill, Diguisit Falls, Aniao Islet on Diguisit Beach, Hanging Bridge, Millennium Tree, and Mother Falls to name a few. Friendly tricycle drivers also serves as tour guides.

Looking at the very tall trees, and smelling the fresh green fields overlooking the mountains while in a back -ride of a tricycle is a must to do in Aurora ;)

BIG BALETE TREE

The first thing that we visited is this 600-years old massive century old Balete tree that had become an icon of Baler - the “Millennium Tree” in the town of Maria Aurora. It is said to be the largest tree of its kind in Asia. This tree towers more than five stories high. Through the years, the trees roots have grown above ground and in various sections of the trunk and it can fit a handful of people inside.

And if you are into climbing trees, you will love this gigantic one. “For a minimal fee, local guides can assist you on climbing it, holding only to roots and branches. It’s an extraordinary experience. You will definitely be surprised on how the tree seems to look like a different world up above with its unique trail that leads to a seemingly new dimension” as they say.

I am glad to have a picture by it. Photo credits to ate Iza for taking a panoramic shot while I was chilling on another branch around it. I know, I grew up in Manila but this pic is a simple reminder of where I root from :) #Roots

DITUMABO FALLS

Taking a cool dip by the waterfalls in San Luis is our next stop. It is called the Ditumabo Falls or, as they call it - the Mother Falls, simply because it is the grandest of all waterfalls in Aurora.

To get to the falls, you have to trek. So get on with your best flip flops because it is generally rocky. And, I would suggest be in your swimming outfit already ;) There’s a big pipeline (the Mother Falls serves as a source geothermal energy for San Luis) with numbers at around 100 to 1. Just follow that pipeline and it will lead you to the Mother Falls. They say that it is a rough trek but, you will not mind it after being engulfed with trees as you get deeper in the forest. You can stop to rest on big rocks and dip your feet into the clear water that goes running up and down big and small rocks.

At end of the pipeline, you just need to walk a little further and you will get to see - towering at around 140 feet and with the cold water from the highland of Sierra Madre Mountain Range, the Ditumabo Falls freely cascading water drops into a wide rocky basin forming a natural pool.

Taking a dip here is really a refreshing experience. It is cold but for some reason, you will not feel the chill when you get up from the water.

HANGING BRIDGE

In the middle of the trip, I said to manong driver I had to go pee. And of course, he knows one place and he drove us there next. “Not too far from the town center and along Zabali Road, is the Baler Hanging Bridge. Manong driver said, the CR is on the other side.

Hehe, manong driver has got sense of humor. But I didn’t mind crossing the wiggy-jiggy long bridge :) This bridge is a rickety one, patched together from rusty wire, weathered planks of wood and fragile bamboo railings over the moss-green waters of the Tibag-Sabang River. You’ll have a grand view of the river mouth while crossing the bridge.”

The river underneath is really not that deep because you will see a lot of local kids taking an afternoon swim and it is just above the knee high. Aside from taking pictures, you can also interact with these little locals. They will tease you to throw coins and they will for dive for it. So, make sure that you have pennies with you and bring out your “Tagalog” prowess also, you’re in for some convo with local kids on a bridge with a pretty nice view of the other Aurora province from this point.

ERMITA HILLS

Next stop is the Ermita Hills. It is situated in Mt. Dibudalan at Sitio Dicaloyungan, also in Barangay Zabali. Coming up to the top of this hill, you can get a bird’s eye view of the whole Baler Bay as well as the Dima-Dimalangat and Aniao Islets.

But it is not just the view that Ermita Hills is known for. This is a historical spot and the natives will tell you the story by heart. 269 years ago on the 27th of December 1735, a catastrophic event occurred in the town of Baler. It was in the early morning around 2:30 that the town was engulfed by tsunami with tremendous proportion without warning, and within an hour the town was gone.

This is a statue of one family who survived that calamity because they were able to climb up Ermita Hills.

It also serves as a relocation area that keeps the locals safe whenever there is strong typhoon hitting the province. But during regular days, it is a tourist spot. It is like a mini park where you can have a picnic overlooking the whole of Baler as well as the other towns of Aurora.

DAGUISIT FALLS & BEACH

There are also small waterfalls that is a must see (and feel) in Aurora. One of them is the Daguisit falls. If you want a massage and you want natural waterfalls to do it, this is the best place to go. This small waterfalls are easily accessible along the main road going to Dicasalarin Cove. You have to trek a little bit if you want a nice view from the top. Just be careful because the rocks are quite slippery. These waterfalls are made up of three small cascades that drop to rocks and boulders. Its pretty nice to just go sit on one of these rocks and feel the pressure of the water on your body as you overlook the scenic view of the Daguisit beach on the opposite road.

If you want a scenic view on the other hand, try the Daguisit beach. From here, you can sit on top of some rock formations and see the small islets of the other nearby beaches such as the Aniao.

ANIAO ISLETS

Off to the next beach that will take your breath away. My favorite part of the tour - the seeing the Aniao Islets.

You think that it is just one of them beaches here in Aurora but when you are in the zone, it feels like you were morphed into paradise. I just simply love the elements of this beach surrounding the Islets - the sand, the rocks, the sky and the crystal clear water. It was almost sunset when we got there, the sky was filled with thick rich clouds when we arrived. The sun was illuminating the rich creamy sand and the dark rock formations underneath the crystal clear water. You can just simply chill on these boulders as the waves crash in on you. Not so distantly are the islets that sprang a few distance from the shore. You can surely hide underneath these rocks if you don’t feel like getting toasted by the sun. I went on a frenzy taking lots of pictures of this place. This is just simply one of my favorite spots in Aurora.

BALER FISHPORT

Nearby the Aniao Islets is the Baler Fishport. It is not really a part of our itinerary but manong driver suggested for us to check it out. It was something to check out indeed because, the first thing you will notice is the nearby mountains’ scenic view.

As for the port itself, it was not that busy during that time. It was almost sunset and all the fishermen and their boats went home. There were only a handful of people with their fishing rods trying to catch a fish, perhaps for dinner. Also, there’s a couple of jet ski’s by the water. You can tell that some of the people fishing must have arrived in style :)

It is a nice way to spend the afternoon here. Try to catch a fish and experience the sunset overlooking the mountains. For sure, even if you did not catch any fish, you will still be happy.

QUEZON MEMORIAL PARK

Back to the town proper. In this place, you can relive the old Baler times with its heritage structures, ancestral houses and other establishments that will remind us of the past. You’ll see lots of historic places of interest around Baler including the Baler Church, the Quezon Memorial Park (the birthplace of the late president Manuel L. Quezon), and the Dona Aurora Aragon Quezon House, a house rebuilt in honor of the wife of the late Commonwealth president or just walk around the old streets of Baler and feel the beautiful vibe that the quaint town exudes.

For tourists, you can simply buy your pasalubongs here. Baler is known for their purple suman and tupig. Also, the other Tagalog souvenirs like “pangkamot ng likod” :) There’s also lots of surfing shirts and other surfing stuff like keychains and magnets now here.

BALER CHURCH

As always, whenever I travel, I always drop by the church. We have one here in Baler - The Baler Catholic Church. It lies south of the Quezon Memorial Park, near the town museum, Museo de Baler, and the Mount Carmel College. The church of Baler was originally built in 1611. A Franciscan friar named Francisco de San Antonio supervised the construction of the wooden church, which was thatched with nipa. Dedicated to San Luis Obispo de Tolosa (St. Louis, Bishop of Toulouse.) By 1939, the first Lady Aurora Quezon led a move to renovate the church. The new stone and brick church has a painted exterior while the interior of the church has largely been preserved.

Near the plaza in front of the church is a marker in the spot where American military personnel stood when they came to negotiate with the Spaniards who were besieged in the church in 1899. There is indeed a rich history in this place. It is known as known as the site of the Siege of Baler, which took place from 1898-1899 shortly following the end of the Spanish colonization of the Philippines. The current church was built in 1939 but authentic original details may be seen inside, including the old bell, La Campana de Baler. There are markers that indicate the locations where events connected with the Siege of Baler took place. The film Baler (film), presented during the 2008 Metro Manila Film Festival, was based on this historic event.

Historical background:

“On June 27, 1898, 50 Spanish soldiers and 4 officers took refuge inside the stone church, fearing that the Philippine insurgent army was too large for them to overpower. In reality, the Filipinos actually made their army seem more intimidating by burning wood to mimic the sounds of gunfire. Despite the fact that Philippine independence from Spanish domination had just been declared 15 days before they fortified themselves in the church, the Spanish contingent remained there for close to a year.

Under the command of Capt. Enrique de las Morenas, the troops stayed in the church with rations that would last them for 6 months. However, the soldiers began to suffer from malnutrition within 2 months of the siege, contracting scurvy and dysentery. Morenas himself died from disease and was replaced by Lt. Saturnino Martin Cerezo, who proved to be a tough and rigid commander. Under his command, the troops continued to hold out against the Filipino troops as Cerezo refused to believe reports in the newspapers sent by the Filipinos to the garrison which cited that the Spanish government in Manila had already surrendered to America.

The Filipinos attempted to break down the morale of the troops with the use of some unorthodox methods such as holding a fiesta in front of a church. There have also been reports that women were also used to tempt the soldiers to come out but these are unconfirmed. On April 11, 1899, Lieutenant James C. Gillmore landed in Baler and attempted to rescue the Spanish soldiers against the wishes of Major Nemecio Bartolome, an officer in the Philippine army. The Philippine army captured Gillmore and his troop of 14 soldiers, marching them all the way to the Ilocos region and abandoning them there. The American party was later rescued on December 28, 1899.

The Spanish troops finally surrendered on June 2, 1899. A month before, Cerezo was already considering surrender due to the army’s extreme privation. Hewas finally convinced that the war was over by a newspaper left by Lt. Col. Cristobal Aguilar, which reported the surrender of Spain. The remaining 33 soldiers left the church in June to the sound of their trumpet of surrender and to the cries of “Amigos! Amigos!” from the Filipinos who had besieged them. The Spanish soldiers were officially commended by President Emilio Aguinaldo for their courage, given safe conduct passes, and permitted to go directly back to Spain.”

So, that’s our day tour :) After having a hearty buffet dinner. We went back to our hotel room and got ready for the next day.

SUNDAY SURFING

Of course, your trip to Baler will never be complete if you do not go surfing on Sabang Beach. “With its long stretch of sandy shoreline and soft and shallow ocean bed, Sabang Beach in Baler is an ideal place for those who want to learn to surf. There are lots of surf shops now along the beach including surfing instructors and surf board rentals. As for us, the surf boards are for free. Thanks again to Bayler View Hotel :)

Ever wonder how surfing came to Baler? The 1979 war film “Apocalypse Now” directed by Francis Ford Coppola and starring Marlon Brando, Robert Duvali and Martin Sheen, was filmed in Baler and at Baler Bay. When filming finished, some crew members left their surfboards behind, and locals learned to ride the waves. The film gave birth to the surfing culture in Baler.

While the waves are best during peak surfing season from September to February (yes it can go over the sea wall), you can still catch some baby waves right near the shore all year around. Good enough for us trying surfing for the first time. I really had a fun time surfing :)

So there, that wraps up my weekend getaway in my hometown Baler. Even if it was just for two days, it was still well spent. I was able to rehabilitate my senses seeing the lush mountains, cool waterfalls, tall trees, smell of the grass, hear beautiful Tagalog words, step on crystal clear waters, creamy beaches, get smooched by the sun, moonlight during the night, riding the waves, see the perfect Pacific sunrise… Everything is all natural there, all organic. Would love to be back for sure :)

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