#whyididntreport

[whyididntreportit]

I know there is another blog like this one, but it doesn’t seem to be updated, so excuse me.

Hi, i was sexually assaulted on my birthday when i was very very drunk and very high. I didn’t report it because he was also drunk and high, all though not at all like me. I still can’t remember what happened, and all though i have my boyfriend and family support, i still feel like it was my fault, like i’m dirty. Maybe i flirted with him? maybe i said yes? maybe i never said no? maybe i didn’t fight?

[phoenix-positivity]

want ik weet wat jij deed met mij

en toch loop jij nog steeds vrij

in een andere wereld, in een ander universum, in een ander bestaan

werd jij nu opgesloten en gestraft

of liep je misschien al weer vrij

na je straf te hebben uitgezeten

maar in deze wereld, in dit universum, in mijn eigen bestaan

loop jij al jaren vrijuit

jij mag doen en laten wat jij wil

ik heb dat voor jou gedaan

want ik hield mijn mond

ik ben niet naar de politie gegaan

want ik wilde niet

dat jou pijn zou worden gedaan

ik beschermde jou

zoals je mij nooit beschermde

de bescherming die ik aan jou geboden heb

heb je mij zelf nooit gegund

-

english translation / version:

because I know what you did to me

and yet you still walk free

in another world, in another universe, in another existence

you would be locked up and punished

Or maybe you would already walk free again

after serving your sentence

but in this world, in this universe, in my own existence

you've been walking free for years

you can do whatever you want

I did that for you

because I kept my mouth shut

I didn't go to the police

because I didn't want you getting hurt

I protected you

like you never protected me

the protection I offered you

you never offered me yourself

[thegirlwhokeepsranting]

[pinkfeathergurl]

Bullying is not Okay!

Bullying should be strongly be discouraged and banned in school, educational institutions, and workplaces. It must not be tolerated in any form;

Verbal • Teasing • Inappropriate sexual comments • Name-calling • Threatening physical harm

Physical • Harassment • Physical confrontation • Degrading another person • Can at times be sexual in nature

Social • Spreading rumors • Purposely leaving someone out of an activity or group • Publicly embarrassing a person • Encouraging others to avoid a certain person or group

More about parenting and guidance: https://bit.ly/3VanHFA

[odinsblog]

[just-survivee]

To the highschool football player I worked with when I was 16,

I didn't like it. I left everyday we worked together with bruises on parts of my body there should never be bruises. It hurt, immensely. I didn't have a choice. You held me so tight I couldn't breathe most times.

When we crossed paths in the hall you ignored my existence, yet when you had me to yourself in 'private' you forced yourself onto my entire existence.

But don't worry, being called a whore by my peers took my mind off of the pain you caused me.

[indymoonchild]

WHY I DIDN'T REPORT

1st: I was 13, he 14, he was my first boyfriend. I wasn't ready to tongue kiss or all the other stuff and made this very clear, he still did it and afterwards said "see this isn't so bad". I didn't want to go against it since he said he was depressed and would jump in front of a train. I didn't report because I didn't want to ruin his life anymore since I saw his parents were very hard on him, and I was supposed to like it.

2nd: I was 14 he was 17, he lived in a village next to mine, when I broke up with him for cheating with my best friend at that time he begged me to stay and talk about it, so I did but he stayed quiet. when I wanted to bike away he grabbed my bike so I couldn't get away. He held me tight and grabbed my breast as tight as possible and pinched me really hard I screamed. He kissed me and grabbed my butt whispered dirty things in my ear. I told him I didn't want this but he said that he wouldnt let go of me unless I took him back and got to see him tomorrow. So I agreed to those things for the sake of letting me go. When I got home I deleted and blocked him on everything.

3nd: I was 15 he was 17, our first date was at a local zoo where he unexpectedly put his hand down my pants in the middle of the zoo. I put his hand away, but he put it back and grabbed thighter every time. Later when we wanted to go, he tried pulling me into a bush near the zoo, my dad came right on time because I didn't wanna go with the guy. The relationship lasted 4 months, and I ended it because he became posessive, and he talked behind my back to his frienda and had a lot to say about my appearence. I didn't report because I didn't see this as rape or abuse at that time, I thought is was what I deserved, so he said.

4th: I was 15 he 18, he lived in the same village. Most of the time I didn't want sex because of my exes. He didn't really listen. I most of the time pretended I liked having sex or pretended I was asleep, because he was very intimidating and threatened me a couple times, and also gave me bruises.

5th: same guy, but I was now 16 and he 19. I came back to him because I thought it was the only love I deserved, and the only person who'd ever love me. The threats got worse and when I broke uo with him I got severe anxiety and panic attacks because he threatened me that he would kill me or let somebody else kill me when he saw me again. I didn't report because of fear.

I still haven't reported any of these guys, and I don't kmow if I should. I don't want to bring it all up again in detail.

[missmurderr-blog]

I wasn’t brave enough to post this on any of my personal accounts, but I had to get this off my chest. So here it is:

So when I was 15, my then boyfriend (we’ll call him Aaron) sexually assaulted me. To make a long story short, Aaron restrained me and put a hand down my pants despite me fighting to free myself. Aaron recently retweeted this:

“Sometimes you don’t even realize you were sexually assaulted until months or years later.”

I liked the tweet.

Because I agree with the statement and because I wanted to remind Aaron that just because it happened ten years ago doesn’t mean it didn’t happen. And I don’t know if that means Aaron was assaulted too, but it will never make it okay.

When I confronted Aaron about it months after the assault and said in no uncertain terms that I didn’t want that - that it was against my will - Aaron said, “How was I supposed to know?”

I wish that I’d known back then what I know now. That I wouldn’t have been too shocked to answer. I know that this is 10 years too late, but here’s it is:

You were supposed to know when I fought you (PHYSICALLY FOUGHT YOU) multiple times in the week before you assaulted me to get your hand away from my crotch. You should have known the day before you assaulted me, when I worked up the courage and I sat you down and explained to you that we’d only been dating for 2 months. That I wasn’t ready and I wasn’t comfortable with you touching me there. You should have known when I clawed at you and tried to push you off of me. You should have known when I cried. You should have known from the blank look in my eyes as you and your brother drove me home afterwards because I had no other ride. You should have known the next day when I called you to break up with you because I was too afraid to be alone with you ever again. You should have known weeks later, when seeing your hands made me shake in fear. You should have known months later when I confronted you about it and asked why you did that to me.

And when you told all your friends what you did to me, you should have known when I was crushed and asked you why you would tell everyone when you knew I didn’t want it.

You said, “if you didn’t want people to find out, then you shouldn’t have let it happen” like it was my fault.

You’re a rapist and a liar and I wish I would have been brave enough at 15 to realize it and speak my truth.

P.S: I haven’t been in a Hollister since 2010 because the smell reminded me of your cologne and made me physically ill.

[mollystearsricochet]

it would mean a lot to me if you could sign this!

[yovremytype]

TW: I saw “why I didn’t report” trending on twitter earlier. I’m not at a place to write about my experiences somewhere where I have so many people I know irl following me, but I do want to share my story in case there’s anyone out there who needs to hear it. So here I go... #WhyIDidntReport I was drunk and in his car. I didn’t know who he was. I blamed myself and felt like no one would believe me.

[pinkfeathergurl]

Stop bullying on the Spot! ✊🏽✊🏻✊🏾✊🏼✊🏿

Bullying occurs everywhere, even in the highest-performing educational institution. Learn to identify bullying and stand up to Condemn it! 🛑

Respond quickly and Consistently to Bullying Behavior. We as a community can help our children and teach them the right way to behave. Parents, Teachers, school staff, administration, and other educational adults can come forward and help kids prevent bullying by talking about it.

Together we can stop it from happening. Teaching your child compassion and respect for others from an early age prevents bullying behavior.

More about parenting and guidance: https://bit.ly/3VanHFA

[odinsblog]

I believe Juanita Broderick and I believe Lucy Flores too. I believe all the survivors who stepped forward to warn us about sexual predators like Donald Trump, Harvey Weinstein, Bill Cosby, Louis CK, Bill Clinton, R. Kelly, Jeffrey Epstein, Russell Simmons, Kevin Spacey, Matt Lauer, Charlie Rose, Brett Kavanaugh, Roman Polanski, Woody Allen, and so many more. I believe them. I believe the survivors. Call it a purity test if you want to, but I cannot re-adjust my morals and values just because a “good guy” sexual predator is supposedly on “my team.”

[saddtears]

why I didn’t report sign up in New York

[glittercatmomma]

RAPE CULTURE RANT

Back in the day, I was sexually assaulted in a college dorm room while I was completely unconscious. I woke up, not even knowing that I was sexually assaulted and I did not find out until about two months later because I miscarried a child that I didn’t know I had since I thought I DID NOT HAVE SEX DURING THOSE TWO MONTHS.

I confronted him because I knew it was sexual assault, but he was so manipulative that he lead to me to believe that it was completely consensual and that we loved each other.

I did not have the chance to report the incident because I knew it wouldn’t have gone anywhere because I found out two months too late so there was no proof, and I continued to date him for another month because I was completely brainwashed.

During health class shortly after, we had a BIG lesson on sexual assault and they taught us the three main rules of consent which were voluntary, verbal, and sober. It finally hit me that you might be in love with the person, but that doesn’t matter if they RAPED you. They did not have “drunk sex” with your unconscious body. They RAPED your unconscious body.

The other night, I was with a boy I have been seeing for about a month now and he knows that I have been sexually assaulted before. Since I’m a legal studies major, I like to talk about politics a lot, and Kavanaugh is the talk of the town right now. I thought this wouldn’t be a bad topic because he knows what I’ve been though... APPARENTLY HE DIDN’T CARE.

He proceeded to say that “the woman who came forward had no right to do so since it has been so long, and if it was such a problem, she should’ve reported it then instead of ruining his life later on. Someone should not be held to their mistakes forever”.

I burst into tears damn near immediately since he knew DAMN GOOD AND WELL I didn’t report my incident. But if the boy who RAPED me was about to be in a position of power on the SUPREME FUCKING COURT OF THE UNITED STATES, you bet your ass I would be telling people right then and there! I also believe that rape is not a mistake. It is a conscious act that you make. You can absolutely regret raping someone for the rest of you life like you would any other mistake, but you should pay for the actions of sexual assault. Just because you got away with it while you were fifteen, doesn’t mean that you can avoid it for the rest of your life. You broke the person you assaulted mentally, physically, and emotionally while NOTHING happens to you. What about the victims? What about US?

We go through PTSD and clinical depression after. We can’t trust anyone for a while after and sex is not the same for a long time. I still cry in the middle of sex for no reason sometimes and it has been THREE YEARS. How come I am stuck with all these new found psychological issues while my attacker is not affected in the slightest? How is it fair that his life is fine and my life fell apart?

Kavanaugh potentially being on the Supreme Court is not easy to watch for people who have been sexually assaulted. Trump being elected president hasn’t been easy to watch for people who have been sexually assaulted. By electing this man and confirming the other, everyone is basically saying a big “fuck you” to the victims of sexual assault. We are sitting here blaming ourselves for what happened and watching our attackers live their lives like nothing happened.

The woman who was sexually grabbed by Trump? She had to watch him become president. Or how about Paula Jones? The woman who rejected Clinton’s unwanted sexual advances toward her and almost lost her job over it? She also had to watch him stay in his position of power as president. The WOMEN who have stepped forward about Kavanaugh? Might have to watch him sit on the Supreme Court. My attacker? Now has a family and a baby.

What is currently happening in politics at this moment is hard for ANYONE who has ever been sexually assaulted, both men and women. IT IS EXCRUCIATING AND MENTALLY DRAINING. My depression and anxiety has gotten worse just from seeing the Kavanaugh confirmation continue to happen.

Yes, the Kavanaugh nomination has nothing to do with me, but at the same time is has EVERYTHING to do with me. It has EVERYTHING to do with ANYONE who has ever been victimized.

Long story short, I am no longer seeing the person I’ve been dating for a month because I don’t need a man who thinks that someone doesn’t deserve to be punished for sexually assaulting someone just because they didn’t get caught.

[just-survivee]

You have a wife and kid now.

Does she know what you did to me? Does she know that you told me I wasn't aloud to be "done"? Does she know you told me "if you make a sound ill let my friend have a turn"? Does she know you forced me to lose my virginity that night?

Of course she doesn't, but I hope she will.

[maarcelahh]