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internalsealpanic · 4 years ago

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Love Through the Ages (Jason Todd)

Summary: Love like baggage needs to be declared.

a/n: This is part three of a series that is a fic rec list disguised as a fic. For these fics, most of the characters will be speaking different languages, so unless specified otherwise assume that the characters are speaking in the first language I mention. They’re all vampires with centuries under their belt. Why wouldn’t I make them all polyglots. Also, thank you to the proof reading gang for putting up with my shenanigans. I will have links to the fics I recommend in the fic itself. ALSO, y'all can thank @littleredwing89 for the poem that comes up.

Warnings: Everyone is dramatic.

Masterlist

Series Masterlist.

You tap at your phone screen, planting seeds in a satisfyingly hypnotic rhythm, the sounds of the train vacillating in and out of your periphery. It was soothing having your own compartment, a little world you can isolate yourself in while you anxiously await for the inevitable.

It wasn’t a secret that you found Gotham stressful. It was about as much a secret as Tony Stark’s civilian identity. You pulled your knees up to your chest at the thought. Big cities were stressful but Gotham was a different beast entirely. It was a writhing monster of steel and smoke. You wrinkle your nose deciding to sweep the thought away.

Instead, you concentrate on your plants and your farm. You wince looking at your journal. It looks like you’d forgotten another quest. Pursing your lips, you decide to turn your phone off for a bit and pretend the NPCs can sort it out on their own as you look out the window.

You lean against the wall, pressing your cheek to the cool window. You can’t help but smile to yourself thinking of a sea of black curly hair interrupted by a shock of white, sea green eye perpetually alight with mischief or intelligence (9 times out of 10, you really couldn’t tell which it was.), freckles like star map, and a mouth permanently set in a cocky grin. It’s hard not to smile like an idiot when thinking of Jason Todd.

Your skirt flutters in the wind as you dance your way through the crowd, bobbing up and down on your tiptoes over the sea of humans. Sometimes the smell of them still makes your mouth water but not now, not when the smell of Gotham is so pungent in the air.

You see a gloved hand wave at you on the other side of the crowd. You pin your sunhat against your head as you rush through the crowd, your luggage dragging behind you.

Jason waves a two fingered salute at you in front of a motorcycle, his foot clearly stomping a cigarette. You toss your hat to him. It flutters over the crowd. Jason catches it easily, putting it on his own head.

"Hey Princess, welcome back." Jason greets, the syllables of your native French gliding off of his tongue so easily. Fighting down a blush, you swallow your own greeting. Jason would have been a great ambassador in a different life were he not inclined to murder someone with a desert spoon for being a jackass.

He offers his hat back to you, but you shake your head. "You might freckle too much in Gotham's sunny weather." He gives you a hearty chuckle keeping the hat on.

"Missed you too, princess."

You roll your eyes. Pinching your nose, you look around. "You forgot to tell me to bring a gas mask."

"Every city smells like this."

"Darling, you've been in Gotham for too long."

"And you've been in your French villa for too long." Jason says, putting his sunglasses on you. You glare at him through them.

"First of all, it's a cottage."

Jason snorts, "As if that makes a difference. It's still in the idyllic French countryside, isn't it?"

"I-"

"I rest my case."

You cross your arms. "You're welcome to visit, you know?" It was a hopeful suggestion at best.

"We both know the quiet will drive me crazy."

"I said visit," you say, "besides, I think the train ride alone would drive you up the wall." You remember how Jason is with tight spaces.

"Not with you there." Jason winks.

Your heart presses a bruise into your throat and you hate Jason Peter Todd all over again.

"Ah yes, you plan on driving me mad. Evil. Truly evil of you." You say, grinning back at him.

"Here's a wild idea, how bout we just not listen to Roy? How does that sound?" Jason gently suggests, handing you your offensively pink cup of caffeinated goop. Jason can smell the sickening amount of sweeteners added. He might gag.

"Nope," you say, smiling at him as you slurp your ooze. Jason's stomach rolls. Alfred would have an aneurysm. "He was even nice enough to get us both tickets." You hand him one, fingers brushing against his. They felt calloused as they always did. Jason suppresses any oncoming reaction.

He instead turns his attention to the ticket in his hands. Love Through the Ages: Gotham Museum Exhibition on expressions of love. Jason runs through the numbers. "These are $59 each."

"So sweet of him, isn't it?" You chirp adorably.

Jason makes a mental note to kill both of you. "You're only going along with this cus you want to watch me suffer." Jason says, slumping his chair. His foot kicks out to tap your foot.

"I'm doing it affectionately," you say, tapping his foot with yours. "Besides, it's a universal pass time at this point." You swirl your drink and grin at him. It was your real grin, all bright and eager and stupidly sweet. Something in Jason's chest twists. It's always hard to breathe when you smile at him but really Jason would rather all the oxygen in the atmosphere be burned up than see your smile disappear.

He sounds dramatic and he knows that but still he knows it's true.

"C'mon Jay, it'll be fun."

Shoulders slouched, Jason smiles at you indulgently. "Fun for who?"

"Mainly me but you can have fun too."

"You are so lucky you're adorable when you're being evil."

Your smile brightens and with a tap of his foot against yours, he thinks he'll survive whatever Roy has in store for him.

You and Jason have been walking around the museum for quite a bit with Jason's arm wrapped tightly around your shoulders and homicide radiating off of him every time someone even looks at you funny. He'd said that the arm slung around your shoulder was so that you wouldn't get lost. As for the homicide, he elected to ignore the question entirely.

You flush as Jason quotes another line from 'Master Valentine' back to you. You definitely regret letting him house sit. You regret even more not hiding your books. You squirm as Jason whispers the quote in your ear in a husky drawl. The erotica in the book is amazing and you're normally comfortable with talking to Jason about everything, but this- this was just cruel and unusual punishment. It's what you get for trying to make him suffer.

All the pet names he murmured in your ear crawled up your spine. You shove his face away hiding your own in your sleeve. He laughs into your hand enjoying your sudden bout of shyness.

Jason mumbles a half-hearted apology into your hand, pressing a soft kiss into your palm. You lower your head. You're still clearly avoiding his gaze but you let him press you to his side. Jason Todd is an asshole.

You point to a pair of ice skates so well worn and well loved that you almost miss the little penguins stitched on the side. "Love on the ice? That's so cute!"

Jason glances at them with mild interest. "Sounds like hypothermia." He says, shrugging.

Swatting at his chest, you pout at him. He rolls his eyes nudging your shoulder with his. You scowl at him and stick your tongue out. Jason leans down, unable to stop the urge to press a kiss to your brow. You scowl even harder.

"Admit it, doll. The whole exhibition is just Dickie's favorite fanfiction tropes."

"Professor Todd, be a dear and enlighten my troglodyte ass."

He snorts, "Princess, if I was a professor we both know I'd have the highest attendance rate."

"And the highest failure rate." You say cocking a brow.

"Probably."

"You're terribly humble today."

"I just know I look good."

No, you don't, you think. You shake your head. "That explains the leather jacket."

"You love my leather jacket."

"Well, Biscuit certainly loved your previous one."

Jason wrinkled his nose thinking of the yellow disaster. "That dog was a menace."

"She is the sweetest creature on earth."

"She destroyed my jacket and ate my wallet AND phone."

"I never said she was smart... wait, we're getting off topic."

Jason narrows his eyes at you then points to a crown. It was an intricate lattice of silvers and golds with diamonds that glittered like starlight. "Royal AU," he says simply, "go on read the description."

"A prince and a princess from rival nations are bound by a marriage of convenience. Through a series of missteps. They fell for each other.... that one was pretty easy. Do it again."

He points to a blue feather. "Mythology AU."

You arch a brow at him. He waves at it, urging you to read. "A god descended to earth to be with his mortal lover only for him to lose his memories of her." The feather's glow is incandescent. You can feel the power radiating off of it, a sure sign of divinity.

Once, you would have brushed it off as mere story. You've spent more than twice your lifetime now dipped into the world of myths. You glance at Jason. Simple divinity no longer fazes you.

"See?"

"I- Nope."

"You're just being stubborn."

"Would you have been my friend if I wasn't?" Would you have saved me if I wasn't?

You think Jason hears your unspoken question when he frowns. Instead, he turns on his heel to face the other direction. He points to a bouquet of wilted roses tied together by a green ribbon. They still smell of blood and something you couldn't identify. Your eyes drift down curious. Your eyes trace over the words feeling your stomach tumble.

"Gruesome." Jason vocalizes inanely. He hooks his head on the crown of your head, neatly slotting your body under his. You're safe, surrounded by walls of muscle. The crease in your brow softens. You would think that Jason would be less protective after you'd turned but now that you were a vampire, he was somehow even more protective. Roy always joked you only got Biscuit and your other dogs as lap dogs because you already had Jason. He may not have been too off on his guess.

"This should be in a horror exhibit," you say leaning into Jason's chest, "kind of reminds me of you though." You tilt your head up grinning at him.

"If you make a joke about me being jack the ripper again, I swear I'll-"

"-Bury me alive 6 feet under concrete with a recording of Roy singing Auld Lang Syne in a terrible British accent. Got it. What I meant was... you're just as protective as the man in the story." You say, smiling at him.

For good reason, Jason thinks.

Jason buries half of his face in your hair, hiding his answering smile. You smell like sugar and cinnamon. It's a familiar combination of smells that puts him at ease despite the atrocious amount of people in the museum.

You point to another artifact, afraid that you'd accidentally picked at an old wound.

"Star-crossed lovers." He mumbles into your hair.

"Bullshit!"

"Read it and weep, doll."

You read the plaque and the words 'meet' and 'different world' assault your eyes. You scowl at him. "Fuck you."

The grin on Jason's face is genuine. It makes something in your veins sing knowing how much fun he's having.

Your face softens. "You really love this romance stuff, huh?"

Jason narrows his eyes at you.

"You were the one bawling your eyes out when we binged Spaces Between Us. Who the hell cries during erotica?"

"IT'S TRUE LOVE AND YOU KNOW IT IN YOUR SOUL," you protest, pounding your fist against his chest,"besides, you're the one who was crying nonstop when we watched the IDHY duology."

"I was crying because they were accurate book adaptations."

You blink at him confused. "There's a book?"

"Yes, you illiterate heathen."

"You sound like a conquistador."

“....”

"At least they got their happy ending." You say, changing the subject.

"That's true."

"Still better than Titanic."

He furrows his brow at you. "What's wrong with the Titanic?"

"First of all," You pitch your shoulders like you're about to give him a lecture, "That was 3 hours of my life wasted on a shitty movie. It wasn't even that accurate."

"Princess, not everyone can survive the Arctic."

"And second, the most romantic scene in that romantic movie was the old couple staying together as they sank."

Jason laughs, a deep rumbling sound. It scrambles your brain, almost dissolving your annoyance until he opens his mouth again. "You sound like Damian."

"Jason Peter Todd, take that back." You screech, swiping at him.

He jumps back, his laughter still echoing. "Stop sounding like the demon brat first."

You run after him, telegraphing your murderous intent. Jason walks away faster, sticking his tongue out at you. Your growl and claw at the air. You screech obscenities as Jason continues to evade you. He is having way too much fun with this.

You chase Jason around the exhibition for a solid half hour before you come to a skittering halt.

Your eyes land on a vermillion book, leather bound and carefully crafted by skilled hands. You step closer to admire the swirling, arabesque patterns lining the leather. No title is embossed on the front. It's thick. You would wager it was at least 400 pages.

Your eyes drift down even further, finding a familiar scrawl. Below the book were photocopies of some of the pages. Pablo Neruda's 'If You Forget me', Beethoven's 'Immortal beloved', Ibn Hazm's 'My Heart', and a bunch of other poets you didn't know but recognized as ...

"Jason these are your favorites."

"What?" He says, walking over to you cautiously.

You look back down at the pages and your eyes catch on the one in the middle. From the numbering, it was the last.

Love is such a hard thing to define,

I don’t know if I could ever find,

The words to truly express the complexity of such an emotion.

It is an emotion felt in the heart,

Long before it makes sense to the mind,

illusive and uncertain until suddenly it just clicks.

Like so many things in this world,

we tend to know it when we see it in others,

even if we can’t be sure of it ourselves.

I think I’ve always known how much I love you,

When I look at you,

I see everything I’ve ever wanted.

When I look at you,

I see nothing else but your perfect beauty.

Inside and out.

I'm not a poet, (Y/n), but I will tell you anyway I can how much I love you.

-Jason Peter Todd

Jason is a stone next to you.

His mouth is filled with sand as he looks at the far too familiar handwriting. He knew. He knew the moment he saw the red book what it was. Hell, the moment you told Jason it was Roy who told you to go to the museum, he knew what it was. God, why can't he just turn to ash.

Jason can't make himself turn to you. He can't bear to see what ever disgusted expression you make. He just can't.

He feels a tug on his sleeve. He doesn't move. He feels another tug, this time harder. When he doesn't respond the second time, you lace your fingers in his and spin him around.

You squish his cheeks in your hands. "Jason, you actual sap." You say. You look like you're glowing. You beam at him, all toothy and scrunched faced. Jason's lungs stop working again. His mind can't process what you're saying. All Jason knows is that something warm is crowding his chest, pushing everything else out.

"Wha?"

"Jason, you absolute dork!" You repeat, unfazed by his temporary bout of insanity.

Jason is blushing, looking like a strawberry with his freckles. Jason is more adorable than anyone has any right to be. But that's ok. That's perfectly ok cus he's yours.

In a moment of uncontained affection, you pull Jason to you, pressing a kiss against his lips. It's soft and earnest and exciting. It was a kiss Jason spent lifetimes dreaming about. It was you and completely you.

"Jay, they're beautiful." You say in a breathless laugh.

Jason looked down at his feet. "I-" was never planning on giving it to you, he thinks. Because, why would you ever love someone like Jason? Especially, after what he'd done to you.

As if reading his mind, you press your forehead against his. "I love you too, Jay, and you can't argue me out of it. Sorry bud, you're stuck with me."

Jason can't help the smile as it curls on his lips.

He's happy. He's so stupidly happy and he blames you.

"Plus, I already knew."

"Why didn't you say it first?" He asks, his fingers brushing against his tingling lips.

"Cus," you say, pirouetting away from him, "you wouldn't believe me if I did."

"How-"

You put your hand up. "Trust me, Jay. I've tried before." You tilt your head back looking up at the sky light. The curtain of light fell on you like a spotlight highlighting everything ethereal about you. "Remember in Milan? When I told you I cared about you and you told me I didn't."

Jason remembered that. He was angrier back then. He snarled that to you like some wild animal and threatened to throw you out on your ass if you ever so much as spoke a word of that nonsense again. It was the first time he'd seen you look hurt. You face was wide open with shock. Jason felt something in his chest tear at that look. He stormed off, leaving you in that room.

When he came back, you offered him warm tea and a smile. You were quiet, inconsolably quiet.

It didn't…

He didn't…

It didn't occur to him that look in your eyes was heartbreak.

Jason curses under his breath.

You chortle at him, the mirth in your eyes incandescent.

"Yeah. Exactly." You say, clasping your hands behind your back. Jason would like to be buried six feet under with the only words carved into his gravestone 'I am so sorry (Y/n)'.

You snick seeing the look in his eyes. "Or that time in Paris. The one in the little patisserie when I told you in perfect Catalan that you meant more to me than anything else and do you remember what you told me?"

"I told you you were possessed." Jason's shoulders slump. "Please tell me you don't have a third example."

You smile at him pityingly. "I don't-"

"OH THANK FU-"

"I have 50. Well, 51 but the last one didn't count since I was joking that time."

In Jason's mind, his jaw hits the obsidian floor with an audible 'plop'. It would be loud enough that the entire museum would hear it were it real. He blinks at you. "You tried more than 10 times?"

"I was encouraged." You say shrugging.

"Of course, you were," he grumbles and you laugh. Jason's heart skips a beat but he pushes past the feeling in favor of pleading with you. "Please don't list them."

"Oh, I'm not." You hum.

Jason sighs with relief.

"I'm gonna leave that to Roy."

"Son of a- He knows?"

You look over your shoulder. "Yeah. Who do you think I complain to?"

"Who else knows?" He asks, trailing behind you as you walk to .... Jason doesn't know at this point and he doubts you do too.

"Oh just your family."

"I'm surprised they haven't given me shit about it."

"Oh I bullied them into not doing it."

"Impressive." He whistles and you preen.

"Always," you say smugly. You begin to walk a bit faster, craning your neck. "Now, let's go find out if Dickie installed that bakery I asked for."

"That's what you're after?" Jason laughs.

"It's a noble goal." You protest.

"You don't even need to feed."

"I need to feed my inner sweets monster. She's very fussy and is demanding crepes specifically."

Jason smiles softly at you, amused that of all the human traits you could have retained after being turned was a sweet tooth.

"Sorry to tell you doll face, Dickie still hasn't done it."

You look aghast like he'd slapped you in the face with a large baguette.

"What?!"

"He hasn't put in your suggestion from 10 years ago."

"Where am I supposed to get my fix?"

"Are we still talking about sweets or have you moved on to cocaine?"

"Dunno, have you tried snorting sugar?"

"No. Why- Have you?"

"...my lawyer advised against answering this question."

Jason cackles. "How am I the stupid one?"

"I-" Your scowl turns sickeningly sweet. "Yanno, the third time I tried was when-"

"OK. Stop." Jason's face lights up again. "I give."

"Pfff." You smile, looking far too pleased with yourself.

Jason straightens up, something sly passing through his eyes. You stop. The look in his eyes makes you nervous.

"I think I know where you can get something sweet."

You swallow nervously.

Jason leans in. He’s so close to you. You can feel his breath brush against your lips. Nothing else around you seems to exist at the moment.

You lean in to kiss him but you freeze when you register his voice.

“I’m taking you downtown. There’s a new bakery there and I heard the crepes were to die for.” He chuckles, turning to walk towards the exit.

“What the hell?!” You call out falling into step with him.

He grins down at you, arms folded behind his head. “Something wrong, princess?”

Heat rises in your cheeks and elbow him in the side.

“I want to take you on a proper date and I sure as hell am not starting here.” He says, rubbing his side and conspicuously not looking at you. There’s a dust of peach on his face. Your anger fades away. It gives way to a fluttering in your chest.

“Where?”

He looks at you then, brow furrowed.

“Why don’t I take you to the fair, princess? There’s plenty of sweet treats there that’ll tickle your fancy.”

Your mouth waters when you think about all the cotton candy they have.

“I heard there’s a kissing booth too, so if you’re lucky,” Jason continues, winking at you. Predictably, you blanch at him. You knock your knuckles against his chest. Jason chuckles, rubbing his chest. “Sorry princess, I mean if I’m lucky enough to get a kiss from you.”

The temerity.

The gall.

“As long as you get me something sweet.” You huff, exiting the building.

Jason stops on the steps, turning to you with a sly smile. Crossing your arms, you pause bracing for whatever trick is up his sleeve. Jason tilts his head. He says something but the little noises of the city make the words hard to discern. You lean closer to hear him better. Jason steps closer to close the distance, his lips warm against yours. You’re stunned. Your entire body divided on how to react, some parts stiffen while others turn to jelly.

He pulls away, wolfish grin unwavering. "That sweet enough for you sweetheart?"

@batarella, @anothertimdrakestan, @lucy-roo, @multifandomgirl-us, @bungunz, @birdy-bat-writes, @boosyboo9206, @americasmarauders , @l-inkage, @arestorationofbalance , @cloudie-skay, @wunderstell @hyp-oh-critical @glorified-red

#Jason Todd #jason todd x reader #jason todd imagine #vampire au #food

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elliewritessometimes · 4 years ago

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hello. have you seen this post by @notsomightymightytiger?? that’s my friend!!! and this is completely and utterly inspired by that and completely and utterly written for her. love you stabby friend <3

also known as: the tigers go to disneyland, kateva like to kiss, chess, reese and mattie have an understated bromance and cheerwives can actually be fluffy for once

tw: swearing, theme park kind of things??? aka rollercoasters and fireworks and all that. as always, let me know if i’ve missed anything

(sidenote idk if you can tell but i have never in my life been to disneyland don’t come for me if i wrote it all wrong i tried my best)

---

"We're going to Disneyland."

There was silence in the gym for a solid thirty seconds before all hell broke loose.

"WhAT???"

"Wait, really?!?"

"Oh my God, Riley, you're the best, oh my gOd!"

"Why the fuck did you think that taking us to fucking Disneyland was a good idea??" Kate looked less than pleased at the proposition, a stark contrast to the delighted faces of Reese and Mattie.

Riley smiled brightly. "Team bonding!!"

Kate rolled her eyes. "Right. Of course." Their voice rose in pitch, sarcasm delicately lacing their words. "For the best of the team-"

Chess cut them off, not so subtly stamping on her foot. "Katherine, please."

Farrah had been wobbling on her tiptoes, peering over Annleigh's shoulder. She gave a long-suffering groan. "Annleigh, Clark's not a Tiger, he can't come."

"But-"

"No. It's unfair."

Annleigh ignored her sister and switched her attention to Riley, making her best puppy eyes at the captain. Riley only widened her smile. It probably hurt her face a little bit. "You know what? Fine. Clark can come. It's gonna be fun, right?!"

Annleigh giggled at the answer, sticking her tongue out at a fuming Farrah. Kate was in a similar predicament, being held back by a smirking Chess with an arm around their shoulder. They pulled out their phone as well, already dialling a number, “If Annleigh’s boyfriend gets to come, then my girlfriend should be allowed as well. Otherwise that’s nepotism.”

“Fine.” Riley was steadily regretting her decision to hold a cheer trip. On her left, Cairo squeezed her hand, pressing a kiss to her shoulder. Kate gagged in their direction. “You better not, Kate, or I’m banning your girlfriend from Disneyland.”

“Fuck you.”

“Wait,” Reese spoke up, “If Kate and Annleigh can have Eva and Clark, and Cairo and Riley have each other, can I bring my boyfriend?”

“No more significant others!” Riley clapped her hands, ignoring Reese’s pout. “If you can’t get Eva and Clark here in the next eight minutes, we will be leaving them behind! I paid so much money for these tickets and we will not be late.”

The team headed towards the door, being greeted by Eva and Clark already standing beside Cairo’s minivan. They split the rides evenly between the van and Chess’ car (Kate was more than pissed to find that their best friend had been in on the plan all along).

At one point, Mattie took Reese’s hand. “Hey, even if you can’t bring your boyfriend, you’ve got me, right? Ultimate bromance and all that?”

Reese grinned and squeezed the freshman’s hand. “Hell yeah.”

“I want that pin.”

“No, you don’t.” Reese hugged the Belle pin closer.

Chess held out a hand. “Yeah, but I do though.”

Reese shook her head.

“Look, I’ll give you my Tinkerbell diamond one.” They held out the rare pin in their other hand.

“No! Belle is my favourite!”

“She’s my favourite as well though!”

Cairo sighed. “We’ve been here literally ten minutes.”

Reese linked arms with Mattie, turning on her heel to walk off, “I’m going now and you’re not getting my Belle pin!!!!”

“HEY!” Chess chased after the two, trying so hard to keep up their grumpy demeanour and failing when a smile crept onto their face.

Turning to an anxious-looking Riley, Cairo sighed again. By now, she’d sighed more than she’d spoken today. “Chess does know that they could just... buy their own Belle pin if they really wanted, right???”

“It’s the fun of it, Cai.” Riley looked around, craning her neck. “Where on Earth have the other five members of our team gone?”

“Holy shit.” At this rate, Cairo must have been running out of oxygen from the intense sighing. “It has been. Ten. Minutes.”

Farrah wouldn't call herself a Disneyland regular, but she's been a few times before. She remembered a time before her mother had left, when she was still just a little kid, coming to the park for the first time. It had been the kind of magical that only a child can experience, filled with glitter and laughter and something that might have been called family. Her mother bought bubblegum flavoured cotton candy, handing the stick to a seven-year-old Farrah with a smile and a wink. They agreed that it was the first thing that you had to do when going to Disneyland - buy cotton candy. Every time since, Farrah bought the same bubblegum pink sugar from the same tacky stand and ate it with the same wonder as she did the very first time.

Now, Farrah had a new family. In, perhaps, more ways than one. Here, away from home, she's still with her family, maybe a slightly dysfunctional one made up of teenage cheerleaders (and Clark), but still, they are her family in one way or another.

Annleigh returned as Farrah was mulling over all this, a stick of worryingly neon pink cotton candy in her hand. "Figured you'd want to start the day off with your usual sugar rush."

Farrah took the treat with a smile, wondering if Annleigh is only so glad to buy such unhealthy food because at least it's not alcohol. "Thanks."

"Come on, ladies! We've got a whole park to explore!" Clark had apparently already visited a store, a pair of Mickey ears stretched over his head. Farrah rolled her eyes, but followed her sister and brother-in-law (nearly) further down the street because, after all, they are her family.

“I can’t believe you’ve never been to fucking Disneyland before,” Eva looked mildly horrified, “Has Chess never taken you?”

“I didn’t really want to go.”

Eva narrowed her eyes. “Why the fuck-”

“Reasons.” Kate’s voice was sharp and Eva backed off, only kissing the top of their head. Kate squeezed her hand in response. “Anyway, come on, show me everything. Mountain rides challenge, right?”

“Ugh, Katie, the queues with be forever...”

“Lucky for you, I’ll be there to while away the time with you.” She winked, laughing when Eva blushed. “Let’s go.”

Of all the things to happen at Disneyland, Reese was not expecting to get sneak attacked by a literal cuddly pig. She yelped, reaching a hand to smack it away, nearing the point of ‘this might as well happen’, when a small head poked out from behind the toy. Mattie grinned, “Boo!”

“Jesus Christ, you scared the life out of me.”

The younger girl giggled brightly. “Look what I got!”

“...Is that the pig from Moana?”

“Obviously.” Mattie rolled her eyes. “You should know by now that Moana is the best Disney movie of all time.”

Reese rummaged in her backpack for a second before pulling out yet another pin. “Look! Moana pin. Girl, I would give it to you, but me and Chess are tryna see who can get the most pins by the end of the day. Speaking of, was Chess in the store?”

“Yeah, actually.” She hesitated. “Dude, I hate to tell you this, but they had a Belle pin.”

“Shit.”

Perhaps queuing had been a mistake. It had probably been hours. Kate would have known more accurately if they’d worn a watch like Chess always told them to. She was stubborn though, and hadn’t. “Aves...”

“Yeah?”

“How long have we been waiting?”

“Twenty-five minutes.”

“Oh.” They craned their neck to see over the heads in front of them, realising that they were only a few people from the front. “Oh.”

Eva laughed and took her partner’s hand again, “Told you the queues were long.”

However, in only a matter of minutes, they were seated in an uncomfortable car, the seatbelts just a little too tight to be comfortable and a little too loose to feel actually safe. To say Kate was uncomfortable would be an understatement. She was also maybe a tiny bit scared.

Eva squinted at them. “You look like you’re gonna throw up.”

“I’m fine.”

And so the ride began.

Around halfway through, they began the steady climb to the highest peak. Kate turned to Eva, yelling over the shouts of other passengers. “Hey, babe? Remember when I said I didn’t come here with Chess because of reasons? Now might be a good time to tell you that those reasons are that I’m scared of heights.”

“You fucking idiot.” Eva turned carefully to them, holding their hands tighter, worry and amusement shining in her eyes. The car reached the peak of the ride. “Look at me and don’t fucking think about looking down. It’s okay.” She cupped her cheek. They fell suddenly and Kate's heart jumped into her throat. Eva laughed a little at their surprise. “You know what they say, babe, you gotta confront your fears straight on.”

“I can’t do anything straightly.”

And that was how they found themselves kissing on a rollercoaster, hair slightly in their faces, just as the camera shutter went off.

The team somehow reconvened for lunch, stopping on a bench somewhere as Clark unpacked a multitude of sandwiches and juice boxes. Of course, only Clark, Annleigh and Riley ended up eating the home-brought food, everyone else opting to buy their own trashy, mostly-sugar lunch.

“How the fuck did you know to bring all this if we only organised the trip this morning?” Kate sounded suspicious, eyeing Clark like he was the imposter.

Clark looked mildly sheepish. “Oh... We all knew already.”

“WHAT?”

“Yeah, sorry Kitkat.” Chess stifled a snort of laughter. “We organised this weeks ago. We had a group chat and everything.”

Kate spluttered for a second. “Alright, traitors, who else was left out of this?”

Mattie, Farrah and Reese all raised a hand.

“This makes no sense. Cairo, I trust you to tell the truth, why the fuck didn’t you tell us?!”

Cairo smirked. “We didn’t tell Mattie and Farrah because they’re children-”

“Rude!” Mattie smacked Cairo on the arm. “I am possibly more responsible than half of the rest of you.”

Riley cut in. “Don’t be silly, Cai. We didn’t tell Reese, Mattie or Farrah because they like Disney the most and we wanted it to be a surprise treat for them.”

The rest of the group made noises of appreciation or fondness. Kate, however, was less than pleased, “What about me?!”

“Oh, we just wanted to see your face when we announced it.” Cairo didn't hold back.

“Fuck you all.” But they were holding back a smile, already moving on to the next thing. “Hey, Farrah, you okay? Why aren’t you eating?”

The sophomore groaned. “I feel sick.”

Annleigh hugged her sister to her side, rubbing her back gently. ‘It’s because you ate all that cotton candy earlier.”

“It was so good, though.” Farrah frowned, regretting her past-self and her need for sugar.

Clark reached into his backpack, pulling out a pair of Minnie ears, before plonking them awkwardly on Farrah’s head. He grinned. “That’ll make you feel better!”

“Dude, I don’t know, but thanks for the effort.” She fought a smile, reaching up to arrange the ears around her plaits.

Riley had been anxious about the trip ever since it had been first suggested. She’d pored over the plans for hours on end, triple checking each detail with Cairo and Chess. Now that they were here, it was all going well enough. Sure, maybe they had gotten lost a couple of times, and sure, maybe they hadn’t stayed as much of a team as she’d planned, but yeah, it was going fine. Everyone else was having fun.

“Hey, Rye, you doing okay?”

She nodded with a smile, clutching Cairo’s hand. “Yup! All good!”

Cairo did not look convinced. “Look, you've been stressing about everyone else all day, how about we leave them be and go visit some princesses, huh?”

“Cai... Cai, that would be honestly amazing.” Hesitating, she watched the retreating backs of the rest of the team. “You’re sure they’ll be okay?”

“They’ll be fine, I promise. Besides, they’ve got Clark and Chess and Eva in case anything goes wrong.” The taller girl didn’t hesitate from naming who she perceived as the ‘responsible ones’.

“Okay.” Riley opened her mouth to suggest a destination, when they were approached by the one and only Peter Pan.

“Hey!”

“OhmygodCai.” She clung to her girlfriend’s arm. “It’s Peter Pan.”

Cairo snorted, nudging Riley to spark her reply. She watched as the two had what was possibly the purest and most wholesome conversation she had ever heard, sneakily taking photos that she would treasure because of Riley’s true delight. Riley skipped towards her after a couple of minutes, grinning properly from ear to ear. “That was so cool!”

“Amazing, Rye. Who shall we visit next?”

“Oh my God, we have to see Tangled!”

“....Rapunzel.”

Riley paused from where she was dragging Cairo into another set of rooms. “What?”

Cairo laughed, “She’s not called Tangled, babe, her name’s Rapunzel.”

“Oh. Yeah, right, of course, forgot.”

The other girl only laughed harder. “You're so stupid, Jesus Christ, I love you.”

Riley blushed. “Love you too.”

“So you did the mountain rides challenge.”

“Yes. Obviously.”

“And somehow, just magically, you two found yourselves making out in every single ride photo.” Chess crossed their arms, grinning at the couple in front of them.

“I- It was noT making out!!” Kate spluttered a reply, hiding her face in Eva’s shoulder. Chess only laughed harder.

Eva hummed as if she was making a difficult decision. “I don’t know, babe, you got pretty into it at one point.”

The senior cackled, high-fiving Eva over Kate's head. Kate continued to hide in their girlfriend's shoulder, only lifting a middle finger in Chess’ direction as a reply. Chess took the offending finger in their hand, pulling Kate up so she could walk between the other two. “Damn, Kitkat.”

“I’m not ever replying to that name again. I have been too attacked to allow it.”

Eva kissed the top of their head, “You came here to have a good time and you’re just feeling so attacked right now.”

“Exactly!” Kate nudged their head up into Eva’s chin, “This is why I’m dating you, meme girl.”

“Ew, gross.” Chess tugged Kate, who tugged Eva, who finally got them walking again. “Come on, lovebirds, it’s firework time.”

By the time the fireworks began, they’d been at the park for hours. Farrah still had her Minnie ears on, ones which Clark occasionally tried to steal due to his own ears being lost on one ride or another. Annleigh would only bat his hand away, laughing when he pressed kisses to her palm.

Kate kissed Eva again when the first firework exploded above them, being caught by yet another camera, this time in the hands of Riley. The photo found its way onto the Tigers group chat by morning, greeted by a pouting Kate begging them to take it down against the protests of the rest of the team (“But you’re just so cute!”). Somehow, she didn’t complain when it even later worked its way onto Eva's Instagram feed.

Chess and Reese jumped at the first fireworks, too absorbed in counting pins to pay attention to the rest of the world. Mattie wormed her way between them, sneakily stealing both Reese’s Moana pin and Chess’ newly-bought Belle pin. They were too distracted by the light show to notice and Mattie celebrated her little victory by also stealing some of the cotton candy that Farrah had bought herself again, despite her earlier regrets. She supposed some people never learnt.

Cairo stood quietly at the back of the group, showing a still-bouncing Riley the pictures taken with the various characters they’d encountered. Riley kissed her for the final firework, a silent ‘thank you’ for today.

With the lights of Disneyland glimmering maybe slightly tackily behind the group, Riley took one last picture. It was them, the team, the Tigers, silhouetted in the lights but, if you zoomed in and maybe turned the brightness up a bit, you could still see them smiling. That made its way onto the group chat as well and maybe it still hangs in more than one of their rooms. It was certainly a day that qualified for the scrapbooks.

41 notes · View notes

ryoskuna · 4 years ago

Text

⭑ teacher’s pet | prelude

pairing: sukuna x fem!reader/original character, platonic!yuji x reader.

genre: older itadori brother/tattoo artist!sukuna au. baby/kindergartener! yuji. parenting!au, some domestic fluff (later on), other things will be added as they come up.

warnings: possible grammar errors, drama, mentions of insecurity, mentions of death (via yuji, and extension, sukuna’s grandfather), tattoos, mentions of food, mentions of abandonment, motorcycles, parenting, additional stuff will be tagged as it comes up, sukuna’s sometimes a bit ooc (i guess??? feel free to tell me if he is).

additional notes: sukuna looks like a mixture of his original form, and has the extended height from his original form in this (so he is a large, muscular man/a damn beefcake) and yuji as a teen with the naturally pink hair and brown sides. if i could draw him, i would. also, our main character, miss freya is a black woman.

word count: 3.1k

But, here is the reader-insert version... because I love y’all.

⭑

summary: sukuna is yuji itadori’s older brother, and a tattoo artist. but nothing takes more priority than his baby brother, even if he isn’t good at showing it. when yuji falls head over heels for his kindergarten teacher, sukuna soon learns exactly why the six year old likes her.

⭑

additional aesthetics/materials to go with:

spotify playlists: ( x, thank you @gillinanarts ) and this is like a soundtrack ( x ). sukuna specific playlist ( x ), reader/freya specific playlist ( x ).

“Tch,” Sukuna scratched at the nape of his neck as he went to tug at the door. “I got it, old man!” His lips were pulling into a sneer at the thought of some kid playing ding-dong-ditch. However, if it weren’t for the muffled noise of a small animal, he wouldn’t have looked down at the car seat at his feet. He was tempted to nudge it with the toe of his left foot but then decided against it. Maybe that wasn’t an animal. After all, usually… humans were in car seats, right? He squats down towards the carrier, and pinches the blanket between his index finger and thumb, only to see a chubby, red-faced baby, his fists chunky and rubbing at his face. It takes two blinks and a skip of his heartbeat to finally make sense of the note attached on the top of the carrier before Sukuna ever moves to wipe a tear from the baby’s face. “Yuji, huh?” He murmured as the baby made a noise before proceeding to try and grab one of Sukuna’s oversized fingers. Yuji mutters something in baby garble, even sort of glares at it — if a baby could glare, that is — and tugs on it.

“You got a good grip there, brat,” Sukuna chuckled as Yuji grips his finger and tries to pull it into his mouth, only for the older brother to curl his finger down, stretching back to pick the carrier up and bring it inside, nudging the door closed with his foot. He may be eighteen, but he’s not stupid. He hadn’t seen his mother or father in thirteen years, but they still had the nerve to leave their second kid on the doorstep — as if they were telling his grandfather, “You did so well with the first one, here, raise our second one too!”

Another snort left him as he rolled his eyes. His grandfather had done his best — but it didn’t stop the two trips to juvie, and all the countless times he had gotten detention, or a letter was written to his grandfather about his behavior that he had either forged a signature on or tossed in the trash. Sukuna’s pride and the subsequent need to handle everything himself were among his many weapons of choice. Much like his hands, or his knuckles, or his boots.

Sukuna sits the carrier on the dining table, unbuckles the baby, and picks him up into his arms, holding him against his chest. Yuji makes an “mmph” noise and shoves his whole hand in his mouth, chewing on his fist. His other fist takes an opportunity to quickly curl itself into Sukuna’s black t-shirt, holding for dear life. “Did mom and dad leave you?” Sukuna asks, watching Yuji look up at him and open his mouth before going back to suck on his fist. “Wait till the old man sees you,” he adds, his lips curling in a little smile. Yuji twists his lips into a toothless smile, but Sukuna can’t help but think it’s more so at the small fart he’s let out instead of listening to his older brother’s words. The older brother can’t resist the smile that forms on his lips. Yuji is all of a few months old, and he’s a little shit. But something in his heart is warm and full at watching him look around in Sukuna’s arms, occasionally moving to slap his wet, spit covered hand on either Sukuna’s face or over his mouth.

Sukuna barely notices he’s pulled at the cord that twists open the blinds. He can hear the hum from the lights in his grandfather’s room, glances to the older man in the bed and then back to the bushes outside, and how someone neatly takes the time to blow cut leaves into a pile, as if it matters. He stopped paying attention to the deafening silence between his grandfather after the first time the man has said, “Make sure you take care of Yuji.”

As if Sukuna would do anything else when it came to his younger brother. Taking care of Yuji is all he’s ever done, at least for the past six years. When it came to Yuji, it was like the heavens had given him a second chance, another attempt to make something decent of himself instead of picking locks and picking fights.

It’s not like he had a choice when a baby shows up on his doorstep (well, his grandfather’s doorstep), with a note attached reading: His name is Yuji Itadori. He’s Sukuna’s brother. Look after him. It didn’t take a genius to know that considering his grandfather didn’t have any secret love children — that the baby belonged to one, if not both, his parents (indeed his father). And was another grandson, another mouth to feed and be left in the care of Wasuke Itadori. But now, Wasuke Itadori was dying — and his second grandson, Yuji, would be left in the care of his eldest, Sukuna.

It was either that or the foster system, and if Wasuke hadn’t thrown Sukuna into the foster system, especially with all the hell he raised, Sukuna wouldn’t do the same to his innocent younger brother. Plus, it was one of the man’s dying wishes to his grandson, so that the least Sukuna could do was try and follow through. “Not like I can do anything else.”

His broad shoulders fill the window space, and he glances over his shoulder to see the old man fast asleep, so he reaches for his jacket on the back of the chair and tugs it on, picking up his helmet and gently sliding the door shut behind him. He stops his grandfather’s usual nurse, murmurs that he’ll be back later in the afternoon, and thanks her for taking care of the grumpy elderly man. He picks up on a nurse laughing at a joke coming from a child’s voice, and he sees Yuji, ever the charmer, leaning on his tiptoes to talk to a nurse who is leaning over the counter and conning his way for another lollipop at the same time.

The nurses surrounding the station look up at the man walking towards the station, his vermillion eyes fixated on his younger brother, framed by dark lashes and a stature that resembles a god. Blessed with height and good-looks to shame even the highest-ranking model, and oh. The tattoos. The tattoos that frame his neck from his back tease on his shoulders, and the few times, the nurses caught his shirt raise; they end towards his hipbones. It’s easy to drink him in like hot coffee, especially when he raises a hand to ruffle Yuji’s hair. “Alright, Casanova,” Sukuna chuckles as he gestures to the child’s helmet in a nearby plastic chair. “Grab your helmet. We’ve got to get going.” Yuji furrows his eyebrows to ask who is casanova, but with the unwavering gesture from Sukuna, he trots off to grab his helmet and pull on his jacket.

“Thanks for looking out for him,” Sukuna thanks the nurse — a blonde girl, no older than about 21. She has a training sticker on her badge and her hair pulled into two buns on the side of her head. He watches as her cheeks turn pink. His hand dips into the mug filled with lollipops on the counter and puts it into his pocket for later.

“Of course,” She replies, and he can’t help but think of the irony of her name — Candace (but for the weeks they’ve been coming to the hospital, she insists on being called Candy)— as he looks back at Yuji, who grabs up at his hand, and holds it.

“We’ll see you later, Candy.” Sukuna winks, a sly smile pulling at the corners of his lips. “Stay sweet, yeah?” He grins to himself when he spots the bright red on her face. That was the reaction he had wanted all along — the crimson on her flushed cheeks. His boots echo down the hall with Yuji at his side before looking down at the six-year-old.

“We’ll be back this afternoon to see granddad,” Sukuna informs him as he gives a click of his tongue for Yuji not to unwrap the candy in his fist. “You haven’t had breakfast yet.”

Yuji sighs and gives a small huff before asking the question he’s been thinking of all morning. “Kuna?”

“Yeah, what is it?”

“Is Granddad going to die?”

“Tch,” Sukuna starts, his tongue going against his cheek before he then raises his shoulder. He’s not the grim reaper, so he can’t give an exact answer, but Sukuna isn’t one to lie to Yuji, and there’s no point in sugarcoating it either. “Maybe. I don’t know.” Sukuna watches how Yuji’s head looks down at his light-up sneakers — which in any case, the boy would have taken delight in —and picks him up onto his hip. “But if it happens, don’t worry. I’ll take care of you, and we’ll be fine. Think of good shit, okay? Like the flowers, we’ll bring the nurses. Or… what you want for breakfast.”

“Pancakes!” Yuji yells, wrapping his arm around Sukuna’s neck. Sukuna lets a small smile form on his lips. That’s better, he thinks to himself. He’s too young to be that aware. He can’t say that, knowing he was the same way. He was too aware, too knowing, but maybe not having his parents around always wondering why they did that to him. It’s too late to be tortured by what-ifs; he’s got better things to think about, like where he’s going to find pancakes from and driving a motorcycle safely with a small child in a car seat behind him.

“Alright,” Sukuna agrees. “Pancakes it is.”

. . .

The smell of ink wraps around the lingering scent of cleaner — bleach, wet wipes, the like as Freya follows her friend inside. Brown eyes look over the panels of designs lining the walls, only stopping when Rachel sets the deposit for the both of them. There’s a clean black motorcycle outside, shiny as if it was freshly washed. The only thing strange about it is the child’s car seat on the back, which sticks out like a sore thumb. Just like that car seat, she feels out of place in a pair of bell-bottom jeans with little bows on the back and a sheer pink shirt covered in strawberries. Her fingers dig a little into the sides of her denim jacket, but otherwise, there’s nowhere to hide.

The guitar chords of Come as You Are by Nirvana play on the speaker overhead. It’s loud enough to be heard but not too loud to block out the television for the child who sits in a bean bag chair, munching on what looks like pancakes in a to-go container. Freya can’t help but notice his pink hair, almost rose gold under the fluorescent light. Her eyes soften as she watches him laugh at Tom, getting whacked in the head by Jerry, again for the umpteenth time. Her necklace dances among her collarbones, her fingers reaching up and tug gently. She only turns when she hears the pop of someone’s gum — the secretary, handling the front desk as she settles a hand on her hip. “Can I help you?” She asks, with dark red hair, blonde tips at the bottom. Her gum pops again, this time blowing into a bubble before popping over her onyx colored lipstick.

Rachel nods and gestures to the paperwork they’ve signed on the counter. “We’ve got an appointment. Both of us.” Freya walks over to the counter, and she can hear the soft squeak of a chair and the slam of a trash can lid before a door shuts.

“ Do you remember who?” Rachel nods before pointing a finger.

“I got her an appointment with Sukuna since he’s good at everything — and I’ve got one with Naomi.”

The redhead sighs, scratching the back of her neck. “Gimme a second,” she sighs before hopping over the side of the l-shaped desk. She walks into the room that’s off the lobby side and gives a tap on the wall. “Sukuna, Naomi, you ready?” She asked, furrowing her eyebrows. Sukuna rolls up his sleeves as he sits back in his chair and then waved a hand. However, Naomi has someone in her chair, tattooing something on someone’s back — a dragon, maybe?

“Send ‘em this way, Lila,” he leans back in his chair, pins up his sleeves, and his feet cross in front of him. He’s got these black combat boots on, his jeans neatly tucked into them, and Rachel gives Freya a little nudge forward.

“Go ahead. Good luck,” She smiles. “If you cry, I’ll come running, but remember! You said you wanted to start checking off your bucket list.” she teased before Freya gives a roll of her eyes. Her fingers tug a little onto her curls in her hair before pulling them up with a satin ribbon. Her dark curls still frame her face, with dark lashes to match. No going back. She has to do this for herself. She wanted to start on her bucket list, and this was the first item. Going back isn’t an option, not now.

When she walks into the room, Sukuna leans up in his chair, and his eyes give her a once over. There’s a little twinkle in his eyes, but she can’t determine what it means. So, she decides she shouldn’t read into it. She’s surprised to see that he has similar hair to the younger boy on the couch. It is the same shade of pink, with brown undercuts — except his eyes are a startling shade of vermillion. Under the lights, they’re almost a bright red, like a fire just starting to burn. His arms and chest fill out a compressed charcoal gray shirt tucked into his light-colored denim jeans, and his fingernails pick at his cuticles as he leans back into his chair, tilting his head to look up at her.

Freya can’t help but be warm from it as she walks over, and he gives a tilt of his head to gesture for her to sit, holding his hand out. “Let me see your paper,” he demands, but his voice isn’t inherently harsh. A bit gruff, deep, and his fingers feel warm but calloused. They go over her palm before returning closer to their owner, and he adds, “Take off your jacket.” He’s beautiful. Godly, even. She watches how he breathes — just like her— but his chest expands, inches a little smaller once he exhales, and repeats all over again. The tattoos that curl towards his neck’s nape are made of dark ink, as black as a void. She can see the curl of his canine towards his lip as he gently sinks his teeth in, like a bee pressing into a flower. His shoulders are broad enough to fill the chair itself; in fact, he’s almost too big, and she can’t help but think of what’s like just to be closer to him.

Sukuna reads over the paper, looks at the location. Shoulder cap. “Is this your first time?” He raises an eyebrow, but he doesn’t meet her gaze. There’s also what she doesn’t want, and he everything she put, he couldn’t see her with anyways. No skulls, nothing he would consider masculine or edgy first. Freya nods, still a bit hesitant to say anything. “Yes,” she clarifies, reminding herself to nod. If she was going to ask her students to use her words, she should hold herself to the same standard, right?

“You know that’s not an easy spot, right?”

“I know. I can take it.” Sukuna chuckles, gives a murmur of I don’t doubt that, and then stands to his feet. His eyes are soft before he glances at the paper again and gestures. The sunlight hits him just right from the wide window near his station, and there’s a clearing filled with a mixture of unidentifiable wildflowers. They’re beautiful, and every one looks different to her eyes… she wonders if he chose it for the view.

“You… sure you want to give me free rein on your tattoo?”

“Ehrm, yeah,” Freya swallowed. “I heard you were the best, and I don’t want a tattoo that’s like anyone else’s… so I figured I would trust your creativity.” However, Sukuna smiles and raises an eyebrow. The comment strokes his pride, amused at his legacy that undoubtedly gets passed from client to client. His eyes give her another look over as he picks up a tablet and takes her in. And is she easy to take in… so much so, he has to remind himself to slow down, lest he absorbs her somehow, and she disappear entirely from his sight. He looks at the deep v of her blouse, and the somewhat innocence in glitter strawberries, and the puff sleeves that remind him so much of the clouds Yuji likes to draw. When he inhales again, he’s taking in her skin color as it absorbs the light. It’s like the sun has kissed her, even given her a halo. She’s a canvas of his creation. The strawberries. The sun halo.

And he picks up his pen and starts to draw. The first muse he’s had since… well, he couldn’t remember the last time he had a muse. But he would relish it while he could, before the reality set back in. “You can sit — what’s your name?” His fingers work fast with her appearance burned into his memory as he hears the soft squeak of his tattooing chair she sits in.

“Freya.”

Sukuna mouths her name to himself as he sketches a mass of flowers, a halo with rays behind them— he even works in a strawberry, as a reminder of what she was wearing, and at the bottom of the bouquet is the ivy that wraps all the flowers together. “Take a look,” he starts, “Tell me if you don’t like it. Be honest, because these are permanent.” There’s some part of Freya that’s tempted to give a brief I know, but there’s a lack of maliciousness in his tone that makes her bite her tongue. She leans over into his space, and he gets the slightest whiff of her shampoo — something sweet mixed with the scent of mint, making him release a soft hum.

“It’s beautiful,” Freya admits, nodding. “Perfect.”

A pleased smile edges it way onto Sukuna’s lips, before he nods. “Then let’s get started. Lemme wash my hands and grab some gloves, and we’ll be ready to go. Go ahead and get your shoulder out, and I’ll grab a towel to keep from getting your clothes dirty.”

“Thank you.”

“Mhm,” Sukuna nods, looking over his shoulder. “No problem, Frey.”

99 notes · View notes

soc-characters-as-songs · 3 years ago

Note

individual lines from folklore?

alrighty, I’m shaking things up for this one!! I’m going through all 17 songs, and just listing lyrics that remind of characters, meaning some may get multiple lyrics! why? because I can.

ivy:

“you know the greatest films of all time were never made”

“we gather here, we line up weeping in a sunlit room”

“I’ll show you ever version of yourself tonight”

“you’re a flashback on a film reel on the one screen in my town”

meredith:

“I knew you/leaving like a father/running like water”

“and if I’m dead to you why are you at the wake”

“and I’m still a believer, but I don’t know why/I’ve never been a natural, all I do is try try try”

“and it’s hard to be at a party when I feel like an open wound”

diana:

“and the town said how did a middle class divorcee do it”

“even on my worst day, did I deserve babe/all the hell you gave me”

“make sure nobody sees you leave/hood over your head keep your eyes down”

“do you see my face in your neighbors lawn?/does she smile?/or does she mouth fuck you forever?”

dahlia:

“when you are young they assume you know nothing”

“when no one is around my dear/you’ll find me on my tallest tiptoes/spinning in my highest heels”

“hell was the journey but it brought me heaven”

“don’t want no other shade of blue, but you/no other sadness in the world would do”

alassie:

“there goes the most shameless woman this town has ever seen/she had a marvelous time ruining everything”

“and they called off the circus, burned the disco down”

“and my words shoot to kill when I’m mad/I have a lot of regrets about that”

“does a scorpion sting when fighting back?/they strike to kill, and you know I will”

ramona:

“but we were something don’t you think so?”

“and I can see us twisted in bedsheets/august sipped away like a bottle of wine/cause you were never mine”

“take the words for what they are/a dwindling mercurial high”

“I was nowhere to be found/I hate the crowds, you know that/plus I saw you dance with him”

rhea:

“the smell of smoke would hang around this long/cause I knew everything when I was young”

“pouring out my heart to a stranger/but I didn’t pour the whiskey”

“cold was the steel of my axe to grind”

“every time you say I seem angry/I get more angry”

cornelia:

“in my defense I have none/for never leaving well enough alone”

“rosé flowing with your chosen family”

“time, mystical time/cutting me open then healing me fine”

“and there’s nothing like a mad woman/what a shame she want mad/and no one likes a mad woman/you made her like that”

kaden:

“I didn’t have it in myself to go with grace/because when I’d fight you used to tell me I was brave”

“sweet tea in the summer/cross my heart won’t tell no other/and though I can’t recall your face/I’ve still got love for you”

“and you want to scream don’t call me kid, don’t call me baby”

“standing in your cardigan/kissing in my car again/stopped under a streetlight/you know I miss you”

andreia:

“they say she was seen on occasion, pacing the rocks, staring out at the midnight sea”

“I think I’ve seen this film before/and I didn’t like the ending”

“you turned into your worst fears/and you’re tossing out blame drunk on this pain/crossing out the good years”

“I’ve been having a hard time adjusting/had the shiniest wheels now they’re rusting”

arely:

“but I knew you/dancing in your Levi’s/drunk under a street light”

“you are not like the regulars/masquerade revelers/drunk as they watch my shattered edges glisten”

“but if I showed up at your party/would you have me? would you want me?/would you tell me to go fuck myself/or lead me to the garden?”

“I never had the courage of my convictions/as long as danger is near”

suzy:

“second third and hundredth chances/balancing on breaking branches”

“please picture me in the weeds/before I learned civility/I used to scream ferociously/anytime I wanted”

“and you know damn well/for you I’d ruin myself/a million little times”

“our coming of age has come and gone/suddenly this summer it’s clear”

samuel:

“but I knew you/playing hide and seek and/giving me your weekends”

“and I’ve been meaning to tell you/I think your house is haunted/your dad is always mad and that must be why”

“keep your helmet, keep your life son/just a flesh wound, here’s your rifle”

“with you I serve, with you I fall down”

bianca:

“I hit the ground running each night”

“teal was the color of your shirt/when you were sixteen at the yogurt shop/you used to work at to make a little money”

“you heard the rumors from Inez/you can’t believe a word she says/most times, but this time it was true”

“the devils in the details, but you’ve got a friend in me”

archibald:

“I have this dream you’re doing cool shit/having adventures on your own”

“I knew you’d miss me once the thrill expired”

“I’m still on that tightrope/still trying everything to get you laughing at me”

“and isn’t it just so pretty to think/all along there was/some invisible string/tying you to me”

raphael:

“and I still talk to you (when I’m screaming at the sky)”

“and when I break its in a million pieces”

“they told me all of my cages were mental/so I got wasted like all my potential”

“they say move on but you know I won’t”

#the selected #host characters

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ddudumemes · 4 years ago

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FOLKLORE SENTENCE STARTERS : PART ONE

(( collection of ONE HUNDRED AND TWENTY EIGHT sentence starters taken from TRACKS ONE - EIGHT of TAYLOR SWIFT’S eighth studio album ‘ FOLKLORE ’ . ))

001. THE 1 . ‘ i’m doing good , i’m on some new shit . ’ ‘ i’ve been saying “ yes ” instead of “ no ” . ’ ‘ i thought i saw you at the bus stop ... i didn’t though . ’ ‘ you know the greatest films of all time were never made . ’ ‘ if you wanted me , you really should have showed . ’ ‘ if you never bleed , you’re never gonna grow . ’ ‘ it’s alright now . ’ ‘ we were something , don’t you think so ? ’ ‘ if my wishes came true , it would’ve been you . ’ ‘ in my defence , i have none for never leaving well enough alone . ’ ‘ it would have been fun if you would’ve been the one . ’ ‘ you meet some woman on the internet and take her home . ’ ‘ we never painted by the numbers , but we were making it count . ’ ‘ you know the greatest loves of all time are over now . ’ ‘ it’s another day waking up alone . ’ ‘ if one thing had been different , would everything be different today ? ’ ‘ it would’ve been sweet , if it could’ve been me . ’ ‘ in my defence , i have none for digging up the grave another time . ’ 002. CARDIGAN . ‘ when you are young they assume you know nothing . ’ ‘ i knew you . ’ ‘ baby , kiss it better . ’ ‘ and when i felt like i was an old cardigan under someone's bed you put me on and said i was your favorite . ’ ‘ a friend to all is a friend to none . ’ ‘ to kiss in cars and downtown bars was all we needed . ’ ‘ you drew stars around my scars but now i’m bleeding . ’ ‘ i knew you’d linger like a tattooed kiss . ’ ‘ i knew you’d haunt all of my what ifs . ’ ‘ i knew i’d curse you for the longest time . ’ ‘ i knew you’d miss me when the thrill expired . ’ ‘ i knew you’d come back to me . ’ 003. THE LAST GREAT AMERICAN DYNASTY . ‘ the wedding was charming , if a little gauche . ’ ‘ there’s only so far new money goes . ’ ‘ it must’ve been her fault his heart gave out . ’ ‘ who knows , if she never showed up , what could’ve been . ’ ‘ there goes the maddest woman this town has ever seen . ’ ‘ she had a marvelous time ruining everything . ’ ‘ there goes the most shameless woman this town has ever seen . ’ ‘ she stole his dog . ’ ‘ who knows , if i never showed up , what could have been . ’ ‘ there goes the loudest woman this town has ever seen . ’ ‘ i had a marvelous time ruining everything . ’ ‘ i had a marvelous time . ’ 004. EXILE . ‘ i can see you standing , honey , with his arms around your body . ’ ‘ it took you five whole minutes to pack us up and leave me with it . ’ ‘ i think i’ve seen this film before ... and i didn’t like the ending . ’ ‘ you’re not my homeland anymore ... so what am i defending now ? ’ ‘ you were my town , now i’m in exile seeing you out . ’ ‘ i can see you staring , honey , like he’s just your understudy . ’ ‘ you’d get your knuckles bloody for me . ’ ‘ those eyes add insult to injury . ’ ‘ i’m not your problem anymore . ’ ‘ who am i offending now ? ’ ‘ you were my crown , now i’m in exile seeing you out . ’ ‘ i’m leaving out the side door . ’ ‘ there is no amount of crying i can do for you . ’ ‘ we always walked a very thin line . ’ ‘ you didn’t even hear me out . ’ ‘ you never gave a warning sign . ’ ‘ i gave so many signs . ’ ‘ i never learned to read your mind . ’ ‘ you never learned to read my mind . ’ ‘ i couldn’t turn things around . ’ ‘ you never turned things around . ’ ‘ you didn’t even see the signs . ’ ‘ i gave so many signs , so many times . ’ ‘ you never gave a warning sign . ’ 005. MY TEARS RICOCHET . ‘ if i’m on fire , you’ll be made of ashes too . ’ ‘ even on my worst day , did i deserve all the hell you gave me ? ’ ‘ i loved you . ’ ‘ i swear i loved you ‘til my dying day . ’ ‘ i didn’t have it in myself to go with grace . ’ ‘ you’re the hero flying around saving face . ’ ‘ and if i’m dead to you , why are you at the wake ? ’ ‘ look at how my tears ricochet . ’ ‘ you know i didn’t want to have to haunt you . ’ ‘ what a ghostly scene . ’ ‘ you wear the same jewels that i gave you as you bury me . ’ ‘ i can go anywhere i want . ’ ‘ i can go anywhere i want , just not home . ’ ‘ you can aim for my heart , go for blood . ’ ‘ you would still miss me in your bones . ’ ‘ i still talk to you ... when i’m screaming at the sky . ’ ‘ when you can’t sleep at night , you’ll hear my stolen lullabies . ’ ‘ you had to kill me , but it killed you just the same . ’ ‘ you turned into your worst fears . ’ ‘ you’re tossing out blame , drunk on this pain , crossing out the good years . ’ 006. MIRRORBALL . ‘ i’m a mirrorball . ’ ‘ i’ll show you every version of yourself tonight . ’ ‘ when i break it’s in a million pieces . ’ ‘ when no one is around , my dear , you’ll find me on my tallest tiptoes , spinning in my highest heels , love , shining just for you . ’ ‘ i know they said the end is near . ’ ‘ i can change everything about me to fit in . ’ ‘ you are not like the regulars . ’ ‘ i’m still trying everything to get you laughing at me . ’ ‘ i’m still a believer , but i don’t know why . ’ ‘ i’ve never been a natural , all i do is try , try , try . ’ ‘ i’m still trying everything to keep you looking at me . ’ 007. SEVEN . ‘ please picture me in the trees , i hit my peak at seven feet . ’ ‘ i was too scared to jump in . ’ ‘ are there still beautiful things ? ’ ‘ cross your heart , won’t tell no other . ’ ‘ though i can’t recall your face , i still got love for you . ’ ‘ love you to the moon and to saturn . ’ ‘ i’ve been meaning to tell you , i think your house is haunted . ’ ‘ i’ve been meaning to tell you , i think your house is haunted , your dad is always mad and that must be why . ’ ‘ i think you should come live with me . ’ ‘ you won’t have to cry . ’ ‘ just like a folk song , our love with be passed on . ’ ‘ please picture me in the weeds before i learned civility . ’ ‘ i used to scream ferociously any time i wanted . ’ ‘ our love lasts so long . ’ 008. AUGUST . ‘ i never needed anything more . ’ ‘ are you sure ? ’ ‘ never have i ever before - ’ ‘ i can see us lost in a memory . ’ ‘ august slipped away into a moment in time . ’ ‘ it was never mine . ’ ‘ i can see us twisted in bed sheets . ’ ‘ you were never mine . ’ ‘ will you call when you’re back at school ? ’ ‘ i remember thinking i had you ... ’ ‘ back when we were still changing for the better .. ’ ‘ wanting was enough . ’ ‘ for me it was enough to live for the hope of it all . ’ ‘ so much for summer love . ’ ‘ you weren’t mine to lose . ’ ‘ do you remember ? ’ ‘ back when i was living for the hope of it all . ’

#lyric starters #lyric meme #taylor swift meme #ask meme #taylor swift ask meme #sentence starters #rp starters #music starters

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coffeeshpth0ughts · 4 years ago

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How at least 10 songs from Taylor’s Folklore tell the story about the Teenage Love Triangle

(First things first: FOLKLORE IS A LYRICAL MASTERPIECE! EVERYTHING IS PERFECT- THE MELODY, THE MUSIC, THE PRODUCTION. IT’S MY FAVORITE TAYLOR ALBUM AND IF IT DOESN’T WIN AOTY I’M GOING TO GIVE TAYLOR MY PERSONAL AWARD!)

Okay so in the YouTube Chat taylor has explained that folklore has three songs she refers to as the teenage love triangle. A lot of swifties identified cardigan, august and betty as these three songs. I’m going to try to list all hints and lyrics to “decode” the story.

The characters are Betty/Rebekah, James und an unnamed third girl. Betty and James are/were in a relationship. However James cheated on Betty with another girl.

Having said that, let’s start with the unnamed girl’s POV (to make it more understandble I’m going to name her Liz)

1. August

The song starts with the beginning of Liz’ and James’ affair:

“Whispers of ‘Are you sure?’ ‘Never have I ever before’”.

Liz was in love with James. However, after they broke up she had to accept that their relationship was nothing more then a summer affair:

“August slipped away into a moment in time/ Cause it was never mine”

2. Mirrorball

In Mirrorball Liz describes their relationship more intimately:

“I’ll show you every version of yourself tonight”

“When no one is around, my dear/ you’ll find me in my tallest tiptoes/ spinning in my highest heels, love/ shining just for you”.

However, Mirrorball already foreshadows that James wasn’t as love-struck and interested as Liz was. Therefore Liz tried so hard to just get James to notice her:

“I can change everything about me to fit in”

“I’m still trying everything to get you laughing at me”

3. Illicit affairs

Illicit affairs describes Liz’ struggles in her relationship with James. As said before, Liz was in love with James, obviously she felt the urge to tell everyone about her feelings. However, James didn’t want to make their relationship public and treated her just like a secret diary you hide in the dusty back corner of your drawer:

“Tell your friends you’re out for a run”

“Take the road less traveled by”

“So you leave no trace behind/ like you don’t even exist”

This hiding game did not only hurt Liz but also the passion in their relationship:

“And that’s the thing about illicit affairs [...]/ it’s born from just single glance/ but it dies and it dies and it dies/ a million little times”

Liz realizes that the passion and love in their relationship is pretty much one-sided. However, it doesn’t affect her love and attachment to James:

“You taught me a secret language I can’t speak with anyone else/ and you know damn well/ for you I would ruin myself”

4. Betty

In Betty we get James’ pov on his relationship with Liz and that her assumptions were correct. James wasn’t really interested in Liz:

“those days turned into nights/ slept next to her, but/ I dreamt of you all summer long”

James understands Betty’s anger and disappointment. He wants to apologize, because he knows that his real love is betty:

“The worst thing I ever did was what I did to you”

“The only thing I wanna do/ is make it up to you”

“You know I miss you”

5. Cardigan

Cardigan is Betty’s response to James’ attempts to apologize. She states that she cannot just forgive him:

“Chase two girls, lose then one”

“I knew you’d try to change the ending/ Peter losing Wendy”

Cardigan even explicitly links to James apologizing to her. Betty says that she always knew that James will come back to her, even when he left:

“I knew you’d miss me once the thrill expired/ And you’d be standing in my front porch light/ And you’d come back to me”

6. This is me trying

In cardigan, it seemed like Betty wasn’t going to accept James’ apology. Therefore in this is me trying James is desperately trying to win Betty back, but he knows that his words from “Betty” weren’t enough:

“I didn’t know if you’d care if I came back/ I have a lot of regrets about that”

“And maybe I don’t quiete know what to say/ But I’m here in your doorway”

He tells her that he doesn’t know what else he can do, because he already is pouring out his heart:

“I just wanted you to know/ that this is me trying/ Maybe I don’t quite know what to say”

It is also revealed that James doesn’t just want Betty back, he needs her back:

“I’ve been having a hard time adjusting”

7. the 1

(Un)fortunately, James didn’t succeed. Betty knows that she cannot get back together with James and she realizes that moving on was the right decision, because it helped her to grow as a person:

“I’m doing good, I’m on some new shit/ Been saying yes instead of no”

She further explains that she didn’t feel like James put enough effort into his apology:

“And if you wanted me, you really should’ve showed/ And if you never bleed, you’re never gonna grow”

However, she does admit that she values and cherishes her time with James, and that they could’ve been together for a longer time if he didn’t cheated on her:

“But we were something, don’t you think so?/ Roaring twenties, tossing pennies in the pool/ And if my wishes came true/ It would’ve been you”

8. the Aftermaths

I’ve seen different theories about what happened after. One theory that seemed pretty convincing to me was that James moved on and went to the War. However during the war he died (epiphany). My tears ricochet tells the story of James’ funeral, which Betty also attended. It kinda gives off some “I told you”-vibes, because James makes clear that he knows he will always be a part of Betty’s life:

“And if I’m dead to you why are you at the wake?/ Cursing my name/ Wishing I’d stayed”

“When I’m screaming at the sky/ and when you can’t sleep at night/ You hear my stolen lullabies”

“You had to kill me, but it killed you just the same”

9. Hoax- the end

this might seem a bit extreme, but I believe that hoax is about Betty realizing that she cannot live without James:

“Stood on the cliff-side screaming/ give me a reason

“Your faithless love’s the only hoax I believe in/ Don’t want no other shade of blue but you”

It tells us that James and Betty had more then just a teenage romance:

“I am ash from your fire”

However, she also underlines that the wounds James left due to cheating with Liz never really healed:

“You know it still hurts underneath my scars/ from when they pulled me apart/ but what you did was just as dark”

--------------

Thank you for reading! Feel free to share your own interpretation!

@taylorswift @taylornation

(P.S: Taylor, we already know who william bowery is:) )

#folklore #taylor swift #taylor #taylorlurking #teenage love #triangle #rebekah #betty #exile #illicit affairs #cardigan #ts8 #lover #taylor theories #taylor please notice me #thankyou #jack antonoff #william bowery #joe alywn

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mooosicaldreamz · 4 years ago

Note

Have you listened to folklore yet?? Can you do commentary on all the songs??

it’s time.

THE 1

This song has a funny vibe in comparison with “I Forgot that You Existed” - it really sets a tone of calm, quiet vibes in comparison to the more bombastic stuff on Lover. Also this song is kind of a banger. It has a very gentle rhythm, like I’m in the sun in the woods and I’m in my hammock. I have a hammock now and I’m considering moving into it. “It would’ve been fun / if you would’ve been the one.” Also I love the “I had this dream you’re doing cool shit” - so fun, so sweet. Taylor said a curse word.

CARDIGAN

This song is proof to me that this album was produced by a Dessner because it has the same repetitive piano that I would say is a hallmark of National songs - it sounds a lot like “Light Years” to me. That song is, by the way, an absolute banger. This song? Fun! It’s an interesting metaphor, and an interesting way of saying the point of the song. And I think it’s much more grounded than some more old school Taylor metaphors of like fairytale stuff. “Tried to change ending / Peter losing Wendy.”

THE LAST GREAT AMERICAN DYNASTY

As we ALL KNOW, this song is about Taylor’s wonderful little house wherein the great Fourth of July celebration took place all over Instagram in the Red era. I googled it and it’s semi-biographical! I think it’s clear that Taylor is making commentary on her life on the Cape just as much as she is telling the story of this person, Rebekah Harkness. It’s an interesting piece of self-awareness to compare herself to an oil heiress who caused quite the stir in a segment of the world that is full of big stirrers (ie the Kennedys who I’m pretty sure she was neighbors with somewhere down the beach). I’m intrigued. She is having fun.

EXILE (FEAT BON IVER)

This will sound like absurd hyperbole but between Bon Iver and Taylor Swift, I’d be hard pressed to name two artists who have fucked up my life more. Getting to hear his beautiful baritone without layers of distress like he’s been rolling with lately is a gift. Thank you to Taylor Swift. “I can see you staring, honey / like he’s just your understudy / like you’d get your knuckles bloody / for me.” VIBEZ???? ARE WE VIBING????? I AM VIBGIN!!!!!! “Those eyes add insult to injury????”” BANGER!!! IT’S A BANGER. THAT BREAKDOWNN!!!! LET’S ROLL!!!! LET’S GET FUCKED UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’m PUTTING THIS ON SO MANY PLAYLISTS!!!!!!!!!!

MY TEARS RICOCHET

LET’S GET EMO !!!!!!!! You know, just recently I was discussing with Lynne (or myself? I talk to myself about Taylor a lot) about how she’s gonna go on her like farewell tour when she’s 50-60 or whatever and it’s gonna be all these low-down sexy baller mixes, like when Cyndi Lauper did her greatest hits cover release (it’s a banger!). This album is just an excuse for her to sing in her low register. God, I’d die for her. I love how sad this is. I have too many favorite lines. “I didn’t have it in myself to go with grace / ‘cause when I’d fight, you used to tell me I was brave / And if I’m dead to you why are you at the wake?” ALSO “And you can aim for my heart, go for blood / But you would still miss me in your bones.” OKAY HONEY!!!!!!! This is a clear Supercorp song. Since I know this is why you are asking. Start here for fic titles.

MIRRORBALL

Oh, okay, Taylor went to the woods and listened to Ryan Adams, Bon Iver, and just fucked around and made shoe gaze pop? What kind of talent!!!! Her last album was premium pop. Why is she like this. This song is very interesting. It’s very sweet. The phrasing on “tallest tiptoes / highest heels” oh my God. I love this song. I might cry.

SEVEN

Another absolute National-style production, God, we are living in my dream world on this album. “I’ve been meaning to tell you / I think your house is haunted / Your dad is always mad and that must be why / And I think you should come live with me / and we can be pirates.” WHAT A JOKE. WHAT A JOKE!!!!!!! What a beautiful portrait of childhood. There’s a scene in Spring Awakening (the musical, I can only assume now that Taylor is a big fan), where they talk about playing pirates when they were younger and now everything is tragic. “Are there still beautiful things?” It shouldn’t be that easy bro.

AUGUST

This, like “Seven” is an Antonoff production, which is just vibes. The dreaminess. We are vibing. As much as I am inclined to hate the line, “August slipped away like a bottle of wine” it is phrased so well and delicately that it comes across more dreamy than wine mom memey. I also just want to say that I bought the OG vinyl and the “meet me behind the mall” vinyl and after hearing the song that it comes from it’s a vibe. This is obviously a teenage romp song, which is really great because obviously Taylor wrote about being a teenager in love when she was a teenager and wrote about like, the classic world-ending Romeo and Juliet style fairytale. But this is….”meet me behind the mall.” Which is such an adult perspective on what being a teenager is. It’s so wonderful to see that artistic depth in an artist we’ve literally watched grow.

THIS IS ME TRYING

I feel like this is the depression song that should have been on Reputation but was so out of step with the rest of the album between it’s thunderous anger / thunderous oh-shit-I’m-into-this-dude that they couldn’t work it in. And it doesn’t quite vibe with Lover either…this whole song is GREAT. It’s very depression 101. It makes me cry also. “They told me all of my cages were mental / so I got wasted like all my potential / and my words shoot to kill when I’m mad / I have a lot of regrets about that.” I LOVE the way she sings “I have a lot of regrets about that.” Also “and it’s hard to be at a party / when I feel like an open wound.” Absolute banger.

ILLICIT AFFAIRS

I feel we should give this song the true banger status because Taylor wrote a song about a girl who is the other woman and it’s empathetic. God, we love progress. This song also does a good job of being about the other woman, but also has a little more universal appeal. I know when I heard this I was like, “oof, okay, I don’t miss being 16.” The word mercurial is used in this song.

INVISIBLE STRING

Not to get too emo about it, but this song is adorable and it’s messed up that she wrote it. The idea behind it that I think must be fairly common for people who are in love, that their lives have unique crossover moments, and there’s this hope/want to believe that you were always going to end up in this place because of all those connections? That’s kind of a complex thing (imo) to express. And she WROTE IT!!!! God. If I were Joe Alwyn I would cry every day.

MAD WOMAN

The fact that Taylor would ever attempt to make me believe this is not about Scooter Braun is insane. I love this song. Proof of concept that you don’t need to yell to show how mad you are.

EPIPHANY

This song is sad. But very interesting. I don’t think I’ve ever heard her write anything like this. I think the back half of this album is a little more experimental.

BETTY

I’m not sure what I’m expected to say here. I know that this song is not actually gay. But I don’t care. It’s country twang from a boy’s perspective and you know what? We’re taking it. We are taking it for ourselves. But also, I love that she chose to write this weird “teenage love triangle” set of songs and that she chose to write none of them from like, her perspective? Right? “August” is James cheating on Betty, “Illicit Affairs” is the other woman, and this is James…when Taylor was 17 she would have written this song from Betty’s perspective. And that’s what we would have got. There’s real growth in storytelling here, and a real interest in expanding the canon of what she’s writing about. It’s really great to see an artist do that. Also the way she sings “The worst thing that I ever did / was what / I did to you.” This whole song is a masterpiece. I hate her.

PEACE

I just learned that Joe Alwyn is a Pisces. I am A PISCES. TAYLOR!!!! WE COULD BE TOGETHER.

I love the “I talk shit with my friends / It’s like I’m wasting your honor.” This song is so adult. She’s in like. Real love bro. BRO. I AM HAPPY FOR HER. BRO!!!!!!

HOAX

I am interested in why this is the last song on the non-deluxe version of the album. I don’t have a lot to say about this but that it reminds me of Wuthering Heights. Also if you wanted to get emo this is probably a good SC song.

#tsweezy #tswizzle #at some point i fucked up her tags

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fleeting-sanity · 4 years ago

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OC Talk #9

My OCs as 2020 songs.

There’s a LOT of releases this year but this is all I’ve listened to so far? Post is long as always.

PS: LOL I struggled to find suitable songs for some OCs that 2020 ended ahhaha I’m slow as always-

Aryuni

Rina Sawayama - Comme Des Garçons (Like the Boys)

Yeah, oh, girl, it's okay You should never be ashamed to have it all Yeah, yeah it's gonna be okay Yeah, you've come a long way

Don’t fuck with me hoe Take you down like Judo Elevate your vision when you put me on the cover

Hot like a fever Make you a believer Write my name up in the sky From Paris to Shibuya

Lady Gaga - 911

Holding on so tight to this status It's not real but I'll try to grab it Keep myself in beautiful places Paradise is in my hands

My biggest enemy is me Pop a 911

Taylor Swift - mad woman

What did you think I'd say to that? Does a scorpion sting when fighting back? They strike to kill and you know I will You know I will

Every time you call me crazy I get more crazy What about that? And when you say I seem angry, I get more angry And there's nothing like a mad woman What a shame she went mad No one likes a mad woman You made her like that

Ariana Grande - shut up

My presence sweet and my aura bright Diamonds good for my appetite Guess it fuckin' just clicked one night All them demons helped me see shit differently So don't be sad for me

I vibrate high and my circle lit We ain't really with drugs and shit Love the game so I never miss Keep opinions muted for the hell of it 'Cause I like my shit

Harry Styles - Adore You (From Arcann)

Your wonder under summer skies Brown skin and lemon over ice Would you believe it?

You don't have to say you love me You don't have to say nothing You don't have to say you're mine

Oh, honey I'd walk through fire for you Just let me adore you

Taylor Swift - mirrorball (To Avery, Avelyn, Saxan)

I want you to know I'm a mirrorball I'll show you every version of yourself tonight I'll get you out on the floor Shimmering beautiful And when I break it's in a million pieces

Hush When no one is around, my dear You'll find me on my tallest tiptoes Spinning in my highest heels, love Shining just for you

Chloe x Halle - Tipsy (To Arcann)

I've been crucified, darling Ghost haunt me like New Orleans I've been charged with murder 'Cause some wanna push me further I'll hit you where it hurts, yeah If you don't put me first, yeah And I don't give no apologies If you lose a life that's not on me, yeah

I might be a little tipsy on your love Makes me a little crazy but so what You're strumming on my heart strings, don't be dumb If you love your little life then don't fuck up

Avery

Dua Lipa - Future Nostalgia

I know you're dying trying to figure me out My name's on the tip of your tongue, keep running your mouth You want the recipe but can’t handle my sound

No matter what you do, I'm gonna get it without ya I know you ain't used to a female alpha

Katy Perry - What Makes A Woman

Is it the way I talk sweet? The way my skin is soft? Or how I can be a bitch? Make you keep your fingers crossed?

Is it the way I cut my hair And put no makeup on? I feel most beautiful Doing what the fuck I want

Rina Sawayama - Dynasty

I'm a dynasty The pain in my vein is hereditary Dynasty Running in my bloodstream, my bloodstream Dynasty And if that's all that I'm gonna be Won't you break the chain with me

I'm gonna take the throne this time All the words all mine, all mine It's been way too long, too far Too gone, to carry on You can't hide it in the walls Sweep it under marble floors It's been living in our lives Best told damn family lie

Chloe x Halle - Overwhelmed

Holding my breath till my face turns blue Head underwater Breathe deeply they said I need a weekend again Looking for bright sides Low on the high types Running so fast, I done worn my shoes Head on the pavement I'm just trying to win Pushed in the river, I swim Nothing can blind side Me like the high tide I don't do well under pressure I don't know at all I wish I had all the answers Fix it all myself (Oh) I feel overwhelmed

Avelyn

Selena Gomez - Dance Again

Happiness Ain't something you sit back and you wait for Vulnerable Ain't easy, believe me, but I do it

Feels so, feels so, feels so good to dance again With my emotions, I just start going in With everything To dance again

Katy Perry - Resilient

'Cause I am resilient A full flower moment Won't let the concrete hold me back Oh no I am resilient Born to be brilliant You'll see me grow right through the cracks Yeah, 'cause you're gonna watch this flower grow right through the cracks

Childish Gambino - 19.10

I remember back when I was six years old Daddy said "the world's so cold" "There is something that you should know", "You're so gorgeous", (thank you daddy) "Nothing's really worth your time" "But someday soon you just might find" "The truth about the world's design", oh

“To be beautiful is to be hunted I can't change the truth, I can't get you used to this”

Ariana Grande - my hair (To Ezekiel)

It’s got body and it’s smooth to touch The same way as my skin Don’t you be scared

To run your hands through my hair Baby, ‘cause that’s why it’s there Come run your hands through my hair Ooh baby, so don’t you be scared So come run your hands through my hair

It’s been way long overdue Just like these inches down my back Usually don’t let people touch it But tonight you get a pass

Enzaran

Miley Cyrus - Midnight Sky

I was born to run, I don't belong to anyone, oh no I don't need to be loved by you See my lips on her mouth, everybody's talking now, baby Ooh, you know it's true See his hands 'round my waist, thought you'd never be replaced, baby Ooh, you know it's true, yeah

You should know right now that I never stay put in one place Forever and ever, no more

Dorian Electra - Gentleman

I'm a gentleman Take my gentle hand Off to a gentle land I'm a gentleman

I pick you up I put you down I say the perfect thing then I make you spin around Yeah I'm lighting you up Throw you around This is a conquest a war is going down

Thundercat - King of The Hill

A king in his castle A king of the hill Wasting his time Chasing cheap thrills He knows it's gonna cost him God knows how much

Jurbiend

Billie Eilish - Therefore I Am

Stop, what the hell are you talking about? Ha Get my pretty name outta your mouth We are not the same with or without Don't talk 'bout me like how you might know how I feel Top of the world, but your world isn't real Your world's an ideal

I don't want press to put your name next to mine We're on different lines, so I Wanna be nice enough, they don't call my bluff 'Cause I hate to find Articles, articles, articles

Childish Gambino - 32.22

I'm a funky motherfucker, man Don't fucking call me I been the man, don't fire me Things ain't all bad

We are the, we are the warlords We are, are you ready? Firelight, got it, warlords Pick it up, no, pick it up Firelight gonna clean it up Firelight's goin' way up Red light's on fire

Riornivo

Harry Styles - Treat People With Kindness

Maybe we can find a place to feel good And we can treat people with kindness Find a place to feel good

Givin' second chances I don't need all the answers Feelin' good in my skin I just keep on dancin'

Childish Gambino - Time (ft. Ariana Grande)

Seven billion people Tryna free themselves Said a billion prayers Tryna save myself I can see it coming But it's moving fast

Maybe all the stars in the night are really dreams Maybe this whole world ain't exactly what it seems Maybe the sky will fall down on tomorrow But one thing's for certain, baby We're running out of time

Running after something But I don't know what Am I running to? Too afraid to stop Hundred miles an hour With no seatbelt on Time is everlasting I can't wait that long

Selena Gomez - Let Me Get Me

Like a prayer surrounding us, moving effortlessly Every word is relief No self-sabotage, no letting my thoughts run Me and this spiral are done Burn this camouflage I’ve been wearing for months Tryna let a little happy in for once

Don’t get me down, I won’t let me get me I’m good right now, I won’t let me get me Take that tired heart and go and turn it inside (out)

Diving in ferociously, dancing intimately I’m so connected to me In the dark I’m letting go, so anonymously I guess this is what it feels like to be free

Troye Sivan - Take Yourself Home (To Rionnic)

Talk to me There's nothing that can't be fixed with some honesty And how it got this dark is just beyond to me If anyone can hear me switch the lights

Who you really tryna be when they see your face? Is it worth it trying to win in a losing game? Well it's all waiting for you And, boy, I know you're eager But it just might destroy you Destroy you

Arca - Calor (From Arcann)

Rio, me tienes Rio, me tienes

Eres el premio que más deseaba Eres el sueño que no me atrevía a tener Eres el premio que más deseaba Eres el dueño de todo mi ser

Lady Gaga - Stupid Love (From Vaylin)

You're the one that I've been waiting for Gotta quit this cryin' Nobody's gonna heal me if I don't open the door Kinda hard to believe, gotta have faith in me

Now it's time to free me from the chain I gotta find that peace Is it too late or could this love protect me from the pain? I would battle for you, even if I break in two

Look at me now 'Cause all I ever wanted was love I don’t need a reason Not sorry I want your stupid love

Taylor Swift - marjorie (To Vianiel)

“Never be so kind, you forget to be clever” “Never be so clever, you forget to be kind”

“Never be so polite, you forget your power” “Never wield such power, you forget to be polite”

And if I didn't know better I'd think you were talking to me now If I didn't know better I'd think you were still around What died didn't stay dead You're alive, you're alive in my head

Rionnic

Lady Gaga - Sine from Above (ft. Elton John)

When I was young, I prayed for lightning My mother said it would come and find me I found myself without a prayer I lost my love and no one cared When I was young, I prayed for lightning

When I was young, I felt immortal And not a day went by without a struggle I lived my days just for the nights I lost myself under the lights When I was young, I felt immortal

Thundercat - It Is What It Is

When the gold becomes dough And the magic starts to fade When it all comes to an end When there's nothing left to say It is what it is I tried to make it work My best just wasn't enough It couldn't be helped, the end The things I would do for you

After all is said and done And I'm all alone When I sit back and reflect From a broken heart Sometimes there's regret It is what it is

Taylor Swift - peace (From Jaesa)

Our coming of age has come and gone Suddenly this summer it's clear I never had the courage of my convictions As long as danger is near And it's just around the corner, darlin' 'Cause it lives in me No, I could never give you peace

And you know that I'd Swing with you for the fences Sit with you in the trenches Give you my wild, give you a child Give you the silence that only comes when two people understand each other Family that I chose now that I see your brother as my brother Is it enough?

Rina Sawayama - Chosen Family (From Vette, Katei)

We don't need to be related to relate We don't need to share genes or a surname You are, you are My chosen, chosen family So what if we don't look the same? We been going through the same thing Yeah, you are, you are My chosen, chosen family

Saxan

Dorian Electra - Edgelord (ft. Rebecca Black)

We live in a society That's always lashing out at guys like me They pushed me to the edge, you see Never, never, never gonna come down One question, why so serious? Did I offend you? I'm so curious Ha, my identity's mysterious Never, never, never gonna come down

Taylor Swift - this is me trying

I've been having a hard time adjusting I had the shiniest wheels, now they're rusting I didn't know if you'd care if I came back I have a lot of regrets about that

They told me all of my cages were mental So I got wasted like all my potential And my words shoot to kill when I'm mad I have a lot of regrets about that

The Weeknd - Save Your Tears (To Linnea)

You could've asked me why I broke your heart You could've told me that you fell apart But you walked past me like I wasn't there And just pretended like you didn't care

I don't know why I run away I make you cry when I run away

I made you think that I would always stay I said some things that I should never say Yeah, I broke your heart like someone did to mine And now you won't love me for a second time

Taylor Swift - gold rush (From Linnea)

I don't like a gold rush, gold rush I don't like anticipating my face in a red flush I don't like that anyone would die to feel your touch Everybody wants you But I don’t like a gold rush

What must it be like To grow up that beautiful? With your hair falling into place like dominos My mind turns your life into folklore I can't dare to dream about you anymore At dinner parties I won't call you out on your contrarian shit

Vianiel

Katy Perry - Daisies

They told me I was out there Tried to knock me down Took those sticks and stones Showed 'em I could build a house They tell me that I'm crazy But I'll never let 'em change me 'Til they cover me in daisies Daisies, daisies

Billie Eilish - everything i wanted

I tried to scream But my head was underwater They called me weak Like I'm not just somebody's daughter

Coulda been a nightmare But it felt like they were right there And it feels like yesterday was a year ago But I don't wanna let anybody know 'Cause everybody wants something from me now And I don't wanna let 'em down

Selena Gomez - She

'Cause she was a girl with good intentions Yeah, she made some bad decisions And she learned a couple lessons Wish I could tell her

She didn't know all of the hurt she could take Her world was crumbling and so was her faith Wish I could talk to her, 'cause what I would say "Oh baby, you're enough to get you out of this place"

Taylor Swift - tolerate it (To Jurbiend)

I greet you with a battle hero's welcome I take your indiscretions all in good fun I sit and listen, I polish plates until they gleam and glisten You're so much older and wiser and I

I wait by the door like I'm just a kid Use my best colors for your portrait Lay the table with the fancy shit And watch you tolerate it If it's all in my head tell me now Tell me I've got it wrong somehow I know my love should be celebrated But you tolerate it

Vyria

Rina Sawayama - Paradisin’

Paradisin' Living my best life, drivin' Drivin' you crazy Paradisin' Living my best life thrivin' You say I'm misbehaving But I'm just a kid, so save it Let me have an unforgettable time of my life

Lady Gaga - Free Woman

I'm not nothing without a steady hand I'm not nothing unless I know I can I'm still something if I don't got a man I'm a free woman

#swtor OC #FS'OC #just stuff for myself #potato mom #potato empress

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staryutae · 4 years ago

Text

folklore lyrics that speak to my soul:

cardigan:

but i knew you

dancin' in your levi's

drunk under a streetlight

but i knew you'd linger like a tattoo kiss

i knew you'd haunt all of my what-ifs

the smell of smoke would hang around this long

'cause i knew everything when i was young

i knew i'd curse you for the longest time

chasing shadows in the grocery line

i knew you'd miss me once the thrill expired

and you'd be standin' in my front porch light

and i knew you'd come back to me

the 1:

hey, yeah-yeah

persist and resist the temptation to ask you

if one thing had been different

would everything be different today?

the lakes:

take me to the lakes, where all the poets went to die

i don't belong, and my beloved, neither do you

those windermere peaks look like a perfect place to cry

i'm settin' off, but not without my muse

a red rose grew up out of ice frozen ground

with no one around to tweet it

while i bathe in cliffside pools with my calamitous love

and insurmountable grief

exile:

you're not my homeland anymore

so what am i defendin' now?

like you'd get your knuckles bloody for me

second, third, and hundredth chances

balancin' on breaking branches

those eyes add insult to injury

i'm not your problem anymore

so who am i offending now?

invisible string:

time, mystical time

cuttin' me open, then healin' me fine

were there clues i didn't see?

peace:

and you know that i'd

swing with you for the fences

sit with you in the trenches

my tears ricochet:

i didn't have it in myself to go with grace

'cause when i'd fight, you used to tell me i was brave

and if i'm dead to you why are you at the wake?

this is me trying:

i had the shiniest wheels, now they're rusting

i didn't know if you'd care if i came back

i have a lot of regrets about that

they told me all of my cages were mental

so i got wasted like all my potential

and my words shoot to kill when I'm mad

i have a lot of regrets about that

i was so ahead of the curve,

the curve became a sphere

fell behind all my classmates and i ended up here

pourin' out my heart to a stranger

and it's hard to be at a party

when i feel like an open wound

it's hard to be anywhere these days

when all i want is you

hoax:

stood on the cliffside

screaming, "give me a reason"

your faithless love's the only hoax

i believe in

betty:

i was walking home on broken cobblestones

just thinking of you when she pulled up

like a figment of my worst intentions

she said "james, get in, let's drive"

those days turned into nights

slept next to her but

i dreamt of you all summer long

epiphany:

crawling up the beaches now

sir, i think he's bleedin' out

and some things you just can't speak about

something med school did not cover

someone's daughter

someone's mother

holds your hand through plastic now

doc, i think she's crashin' out

and some things you just can't speak about

mad woman:

every time you call me crazy

i get more crazy

what about that?

and when you say i seem angry,

i get more angry

illicit affairs:

take the words for what they are

a dwindling, mercurial high

a drug that only worked

the first few hundred times

and you wanna scream

don't call me kid

don't call me baby

look at this godforsaken mess that you made me

you showed me colors you know

i can't see with anyone else

don't call me kid

don't call me baby

look at this idiotic fool that you made me

you taught me a secret language

i can't speak with anyone else

august:

but i can see us

lost in the memory

august slipped away into a moment in time

'cause it was never mine

and i can see us twisted in bedsheets

august sipped away

like a bottle of wine

'cause you were never mine, mine

seven:

and i've been meaning to tell you

i think your house is haunted

your dad is always mad and that must be why

and i think you should come live with

me and we can be pirates

then you won't have to cry

or hide in the closet

and just like a folk song

our love will be passed on

mirrorball:

hush

when no one is around, my dear

you'll find me on my tallest tiptoes

spinning in my highest heels, love

shining just for you

and they called off the circus

burned the disco down

when they sent home the horses

and the rodeo clowns

i'm still on that tightrope

i'm still trying everything to get you laughing at me

the last great american dynasty:

fifty years is a long time

holiday house sat quietly on that beach

free of women with madness

their men and bad habits,

and then it was bought by me

(i know they're not in order i'm sorry)

#taylor swift #folklore #cardigan #this is me trying #exile #my tears richochet #the last great american dynasty #mad woman #the lakes #betty song #ilicit affairs #august

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starlessmemes · 4 years ago

Text

❈ ✼ ❈ TAYLOR SWIFT’S “FOLKLORE” (2020) STARTERS

the 1

‘ i’m doing good, i’m on some new shit. ’

‘ been saying ‘yes’ instead of ‘no’. ’

‘ i thought i saw you at the bus stop... i didn't though. ’

‘ i hit the ground running each night. ’

‘ you know the greatest films of all time were never made. ’

‘ i guess you never know. ’

‘ if you wanted me, you really should have showed. ’

‘ if you never bleed, you're never gonna grow. ’

‘ it’s alright now. ’

‘ we were something, don't you think so? ’

‘ if my wishes came true, it would have been you. ’

‘ in my defense, i have none. ’

‘ never leaving well enough alone. ’

‘ it would’ve been fun if you would’ve been the one. ’

‘ i have this dream you're doing cool shit, having adventures on your own. ’

‘ we were making it count. ’

‘ you know the greatest loves of all time are over now. ’

‘ it's another day waking up alone. ’

‘ i persist and resist the temptation to ask you. ’

‘ if one thing had been different, would everything be different today? ’

cardigan

‘ high heels on cobblestones. ’

‘ when you are young they assume you know nothing. ’

‘ but i knew you. ’

‘ i knew you. ’

‘ baby, kiss it better. ’

‘ when i felt like i was an old cardigan under someone's bed, you put me on and said i was your favorite. ’

‘ a friend to all is a friend to none. ’

‘ chase two girls, lose the one. ’

‘ playing hide-and-seek and giving me your weekends. ’

‘ once in twenty lifetimes. ’

‘ to kiss in cars and downtown bars was all we needed. ’

‘ you drew stars around my scars. ’

‘ now i’m bleeding. ’

‘ marked me like a bloodstain. ’

‘ i knew you tried to change the ending. ’

‘ i knew you'd linger like a tattoo kiss. ’

‘ i knew you'd haunt all of my what-ifs. ’

‘ i knew everything when i was young. ’

‘ i knew I'd curse you for the longest time. ’

‘ chasing shadows in the grocery lines. ’

‘ i knew you’d miss me once the thrill expired. ’

‘ i knew you’d come back to me. ’

‘ you put me on and said I was your favorite. ’

the last great american dynasty

‘ the wedding was charming, if a little gauche. ’

‘ there’s only so far new money goes. ’

‘ the party was tasteful, if a little loud. ’

‘ it must have been her fault his heart gave out. ’

‘ there goes the last great american dynasty. ’

‘ who knows, if she never showed up what could have been? ’

‘ there foes the maddest woman this town has ever seen. ’

‘ she had a marvelous time ruining everything. ’

‘ filled the pool with champagne and swam with the big names. ’

‘ blew through the money on the boys and the ballet. ’

‘ there goes the most shameless woman this town has ever seen. ’

‘ they say she was seen on occasion pacing the rocks, staring out at the midnight sea. ’

‘ in a feud with her neighbor, she stole his dog and dyed it key lime green. ’

‘ fifty years is a long time. ’

‘ free of women with madness, their men and bad habits. ’

‘ who knows, if i never showed up what could have been? ’

‘ i had a marvelous time ruining everything. ’

‘ i had a marvelous time... ’

exile

‘ I can see you standing, honey, with his arms around your body. ’

‘ laughing, but the joke’s not funny at all. ’

‘ it took you five whole minutes to pack us up and leave me with it. ’

‘ i think i’ve seen this film before, and i didn’t like the ending. ’

‘ you’re not my homeland anymore. ’

‘ what am i defending? ’

‘ you were my town, now i’m in exile. ’

‘ i can see you staring, honey. ’

‘ like you'd get your knuckles bloody for me. ’

‘ those eyes add insult to injury. ’

‘ i'm not your problem anymore. ’

‘ so who am I offending now? ’

‘ you were my crown, now I'm in exile. ’

‘ i’m leaving out the side door. ’

‘ there is no amount of crying i can do for you. ’

‘ you didn’t even hear me out. ’

‘ i never learned to read your mind. ’

‘ i couldn’t turn things around. ’

‘ you didn’t even see the signs. ’

‘ you never gave a warning sign. ’

my tears ricochet

‘ we gather here, we line up, weepin' in a sunlit room. ’

‘ if i’m on fire, you’ll be made of ashes too. ’

‘ even on my worst day, did I deserve all the hell you gave me? ’

‘ cause i loved you. ’

‘ i swear i loved you ‘til my dying day. ’

‘ we gather here, we line up, weepin' in a sunlit room. ’

‘ if I'm dead to you, why are you at the wake? ’

‘ look at how my tears ricochet. ’

‘ you know i didn't want to have to haunt you... but what a ghostly scene. ’

‘ when i'd fight, you used to tell me i was brave. ’

‘ cursing my name, wishing i stayed. ’

‘ i can go anywhere i want, just not home. ’

‘ you can aim for my heart, go for blood. ’

‘ you would still miss me in your bones. ’

‘ i still talk to you when i'm screaming at the sky. ’

‘ when you can't sleep at night, you hear my stolen lullabies. ’

‘ you had to kill me, but it killed you just the same.’

‘ you turned into your worst fears. ’

‘ you're tossing out blame, drunk on this pain. ’

mirrorball

‘ i want you to know. ’

‘ i’ll show you every version of yourself tonight. ’

‘ i’ll get you out on the floor. ’

‘ when i break, it’s in a million pieces. ’

‘ when no one is around, my dear, you'll find me on my tallest tiptoes, spinning in my highest heels, love, shining just for you. ’

‘ i know they said the end was near. ’

‘ i can change everything about me to fit in. ’

‘ you are not like the regulars. ’

‘ the masquerade revelers, drunk as they watch my shattered edges glisten. ’

‘ they called off the circus, burned the disco down. ’

‘ i’m still on that tightrope. ’

‘ i’m still trying everything to get you laughing at me. ’

‘ i’m still a believer, but i don’t know why. ’

‘ i’ve never been natural, all i do is try. ’

‘ i’m still trying everything to keep you looking at me. ’

‘ i’m a mirrorball. ’

seven

‘ please picture me in the trees. i hit my peak at seven. ’

‘ i was high in the sky. ’

‘ are there still beautiful things? ’

‘ though I can’t recall your face, i still got love for you. ’

‘ love you to the moon and to saturn. ’

‘ i've been meaning to tell you, i think your house is haunted. ’

‘ i think you should come live with me. ’

‘ then you won’t have to cry. ’

‘ just like a folk song, our love will be passed on. ’

‘ i used to scream ferociously any time i wanted. ’

‘ cross my heart, won’t tell no other. ’

‘ our love lasts so long. ’

august

‘ i never needed anything more. ’

‘ are you sure? ’

‘ never have i ever before. ’

‘ i can see us lost in the memory. ’

‘ cause it was never mine. ’

‘ i can see us twisted in bedsheets. ’

‘ cause you were never mine. ’

‘ will you call when you're back at school? ’

‘ i remember thinking i had you. ’

‘ august slipped away into a moment in time. ’

‘ back when we were still changin' for the better, wanting was enough. ’

‘ for me, it was enough to live for the hope of it all. ’

‘ canceled plans just in case you'd call. ’

‘ so much for summer love and saying "us"

‘ cause you weren’t mine to lose. ’

‘ august sipped away like a bottle of wine. ’

this is me trying

‘ cross my heart, won’t tell no other. ’

‘ i didn't know if you'd care if i came back. ’

‘ i have a lot of regrets about that. ’

‘ could've followed my fears all the way down. ’

‘ maybe i don’t quite know what to say. ’

‘ i’m here in your doorway. ’

‘ i just wanted you to know that this is me trying. ’

‘ they told me all of my cages were mental. ’

‘ i got wasted like all my potential. ’

‘ my words shoot to kill when I'm mad. ’

‘ i was so ahead of the curve, the curve became a sphere. ’

‘ i ended up here, pouring out my heart to a stranger. ’

‘ it’s hard to be at a party when i feel like an open wound. ’

‘ it’s hard to be anywhere these days. ’

‘ all i want is you. ’

‘ at least i’m trying. ’

illicit affairs

‘ make sure nobody sees you leave. ’

‘ keep your eyes down. ’

‘ take the road less traveled by. ’

‘ tell yourself you can always stop. ’

‘ what started in beautiful rooms ends with meetings in parking lots. ’

‘ that’s the thing about illicit affairs, clandestine meetings and longing stares. ’

‘ it’s born from just one single glance. ’

‘ it dies and it dies and it dies a million little times. ’

‘ leave the perfume on the shelf. ’

‘ so you leave no trace behind, like you don’t even exist. ’

‘ take the words for what they are --- a dwindling, mercurial high. ’

‘ they show their truth one single time, but they lie and they lie and they lie a billion little times. ’

‘ don't call me "kid," don't call me "baby". ’

‘ look at this godforsaken mess that you made me. ’

‘ you showed me colors you know i can't see with anyone else. ’

‘ look at this idiotic fool that you made me. ’

‘ you taught me a secret language i can't speak with anyone else. ’

‘ you know damn well. ’

‘ for you, i would ruin myself a million little times. ’

invisible string

‘ i used to think i would meet somebody there. ’

‘ time, curious time, gave me no compasses, gave me no signs. ’

‘ were there clues i didn’t see? ’

‘ isn’t it just so pretty to think: all along, there was some invisible string tying you to me? ’

‘ you ate at my favorite spot for dinner. ’

‘ she said i looked like an american singer. ’

‘ time, mystical time, cutting me open, then healing me fine. ’

‘ something wrapped all of my past mistakes in barbed wire. ’

‘ one single thread of gold tied me to you. ’

‘ cold was the steel of my axe to grind for the boys who broke my heart. ’

‘ now i send their babies presents. ’

‘ hell was the journey but it brought me heaven. ’

‘ time, wondrous time, gave me the blues and then purple-pink skies. ’

‘ it’s cool, baby, with me. ’

‘ all along, there was some invisible string tying you to me. ’

mad woman

‘ what did you think i’d say to that? ’

‘ does a scorpion sting when fighting back? ’

‘ you know i will. ’

‘ what do you sing on your drive home? ’

‘ does she smile? or does she mouth, "fuck you forever"? ’

‘ every time you call me crazy, I get more crazy. ’

‘ when you say I seem angry, I get more angry. ’

‘ what a shame she went mad. ’

‘ no one likes a mad woman. ’

‘ you made her like that. ’

‘ you'll poke that bear 'til her claws come out. ’

‘ and you find something to wrap your noose around. ’

‘ there’s nothing like a mad woman. ’

‘ i breathe flames each time i talk. ’

‘ they say "move on," but you know i won't. ’

‘ women like hunting witches too. ’

‘ it's obvious that wanting me dead has really brought you two together. ’

‘ there’s nothing like a mad woman. ’

‘ i’m taking my time. ’

‘ you took everything from me. ’

‘ good wives always know. ’

‘ she should be mad, should be scathing like me. ’

epiphany

‘ keep your helmet, keep your life, son. ’

‘ just a flesh wound, here’s your rifle. ’

‘ sir, i think he’s bleeding out! ’

‘ some things you just can't speak about. ’

‘ with you I serve, with you I fall down. ’

‘ watch you breathe in, watch you breathing out. ’

‘ someone's daughter, someone's mother. ’

‘ doc, i think she’s crashing out! ’

‘ you dream of some epiphany. ’

‘ just one single glimpse of relief to make some sense of what you've seen. ’

‘ i fall down. ’

betty

‘ i won’t make assumptions... but i think it’s cause of me. ’

‘ when i passed your house, it was like i couldn’t breathe. ’

‘ you can’t believe a word she says. ’

‘ this time it was true. ’

‘ the worst thing i ever did was what i did to you. ’

‘ would you have me? would you want me? ’

‘ would you tell me to go fuck myself? ’

‘ i don’t know anything... but i know i miss you. ’

‘ i know where it all went wrong. ’

‘ i hate the crowds, you know that. ’

‘ i saw you dance with him. ’

‘ i was walking home on broken cobblestones, just thinking of you. ’

‘ those days turned into nights. ’

‘ i dreamt of you all summer long. ’

‘ i’m here on your doorstep. ’

‘ right now is the last time i can dream about what happens when you see my face again. ’

‘ the only thing i wanna do is make it up to you. ’

‘ will you have me? will you love me? ’

‘ if you kiss me, will it be just like i dreamed it? ’

‘ will it patch your broken wings? ’

‘ you know i miss you. ’

peace

‘ our coming-of-age has come and gone. ’

‘ i never had the courage of my convictions. ’

‘ it’s just around the corner, darling. ’

‘ no, i could never give you peace. ’

‘ i'm a fire and i'll keep your brittle heart warm. ’

‘ all these people think love’s for show. ’

‘ i would die for you in secret. ’

‘ the devil's in the details, but you got a friend in me. ’

‘ would it be enough if i could never give you peace? ’

‘ your integrity makes me seem small. ’

‘ it's like I'm wasting your honor. ’

‘ i’d give you my wild, give you a child. ’

‘ i’d give you the silence that only comes when two people understand each other. ’

‘ there’s robbers to the east, clowns to the west. ’

‘ i’d give you my sunshine, give you my best. ’

‘ the rain is always gonna come if you’re standing with me. ’

‘ is it enough? ’

hoax

‘ this had broken me down. ’

‘ this has frozen my ground. ’

‘ give me a reason! ’

‘ your faithless love’s the only hoax i believe in. ’

‘ don’t want no other shade of blue but you. ’

‘ no other sadness in the world would do. ’

‘ i am ash from your fire. ’

‘ you know i left a part of me back in ______ ’

‘ you know it still hurts underneath my scars. ’

‘ you knew the password so i let you in the door. ’

‘ you knew you won, so what’s the point of keeping score? ’

‘ from when they pulled me apart. ’

‘ but what you did was just as dark. ’

‘ darling, this was just as hard. ’

‘ you have beaten my heart. ’

#rp memes #memes #rp starters #sentence starters #rpc

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randomestfandoms-ocs · 4 years ago

Note

Drop the lyric by lyric breakdown for Evie + Mirrorball & This Is Me Trying

wellll if you insist lmao! Putting this below the cut because like... no one deserves to have to scroll past the entire thing if they don’t want to lmao

I’m going to start with Mirrorball bc it’s more the overall vibes and some lyrics whreas This Is My Trying is like, every other lyric oof!

I want you to know I'm a mirrorball I'll show you every version of yourself tonight

okay so like right off the bat, the idea of the mirrorball as a concept is very fitting to Evie — she exists in other people’s light and reflects everyone around her, especially early on. We see this a lot with Blair, where Evie finds comfort in just existing in Blair’s world and mirroring her (but being nicer lmao) because as long as she’s a reflection of Blair, she isn’t Evie, and that protects her in a lot of ways. She’s so terrified of not being enough and being hated and being judged that she finds comfort in that mask because if people don’t like her then it’s the mask that they don’t like, not Evie herself. This is very much tied into her mental health issues and part of her recovery process is letting people see who she is without the mask

I'll get you out on the floor Shimmering beautiful And when I break it's in a million pieces

as I’m sure you know, “when I break, it’s in a million pieces” could basically sum up her entire story. Evie manages to hold it together through a lot of really awful, traumatizing shit, but when she reaches her breaking point, she absolutely shatters. Part of why most of the people who know she’s been in the Ostroff Centre are so surprised is because basically no one realized that she’s actually been breaking for a long time.

Hush When no one is around, my dear You'll find me on my tallest tiptoes Spinning in my highest heels, love Shining just for you Hush I know they said the end is near But I'm still on my tallest tiptoes Spinning in my highest heels, love Shining just for you

Okay so this obviously makes me think of my boy Theo bc he’s an angel, but it fits the two of them really well because Theo has always seen past Evie’s mask. They’ve been best friends for their entire lives, and he’s really one of the few people that Evie trusts enough to be herself around! No matter what happens, when it’s just the two of them (or with Eric lmao, we love our codependent children) she can really just let down all of her walls and be Evie, and “evie who feels safe enough to just be evie” is exactly who Theo fell in love with

I want you to know I'm a mirrorball I can change everything about me to fit in

Oof the way this fits her just hurts me tbh! This goes back to what I was saying at the beginning, but Evie is an actress. Prior to her breakdown, she had always intended to become an actress. If there is one thing Evie can do, it’s pretend to be someone — anyone — else. Whether it’s to fit in, or to protect herself, or just because she doesn’t know how to be herself, changing herself based on her surroundings is something that has become so natural to her that she doesn’t even realize she does it.

You are not like the regulars The masquerade revelers Drunk as they watch my shattered edges glisten

We’re going back to Theo with this, but frankly this also very much fits with Eric, Blair, and Chuck, even Nate, and tbh even Serena. This is the Upper East Side; this is gossip girl. Watching people falling or being torn apart is everyone’s favourite form of entertainment, and the more public, the better. But Evie has this small group of people, her family, who don’t enjoy it. Ivy Week, as you know, is the perfect example of how even the fights between the NJBC get put on hold for the sake of protecting the younger siblings. Serena’s horror during the dinner with Georgina, Blair not sending the texts between Eric and Asher until Eric gives her the go-ahead, Chuck dropping everything whenever Evie is in trouble, Nate making a deal with Catherine to protect Theo, like... They’re all generally self-serving people who don’t hesitate to screw each other over, but all four of them will put aside any of their own issues and any fights they may be having in order to protect the babies — especially when it comes to protecting them from the rest of the UES society who would be all too happy to watch the golden children be torn apart

(already broke this one down lmao)

And they called off the circus Burned the disco down When they sent home the horses And the rodeo clowns

This one is more the overall vibe than the specific lyrics but you know how I feel about Evie in the housewarming party episode and honestly this just makes me think of how it ends with Serena still pissed at Lily and Bart and now also pissed at Evie for “giving in” and trying to act like a family (as Evie would say, “Chuck and Eric are my family, it’s the three of you who need to step up to the plate”), and she storms out which leads to a very abrupt end to the party, with Evie still sitting on the couch just kind of frozen because she was trying so fucking hard to hold everyone together and to make this work and it still feels like it wasn’t enough, like she wasn’t enough

I'm still on that tightrope I'm still trying everything to get you laughing at me

This takes on a bit of a double meaning for Evie because it fits really well with Evie wanting to be an actress and even during and after her breakdown, when she’s no longer sure if that’s what she wants, she still keeps going through the motions to work towards that goal because she really doesn’t know how else to be

But it also fits really well with Evie in her legal family (her bio family, the Van Der Basses, and the Van Der Humphreys) — Evie is always the one trying to put her own issues aside for the sake of her family. She keeps quiet about things that hurt or upset her because she doesn’t want to cause problems, she’s the one who just quietly accepts Lily’s relationships no matter how much she hates them because she knows that at the end of the day, Lily will always put her boyfriends first. Hell, when Lily and Rufus get closer, Evie tries to put her issues with Jenny behind her to make things easier for everyone else. Even in S3 when Jenny is tormenting her at school (Evie is the queen and everyone knows it, and she’s managed to put a stop to a lot of the drama, but Jenny is still trying to overthrow her and bring back all the shitty politics so that she can be on top), Evie just quietly takes it and refuses to tell anyone or retaliate until Jenny goes after Eric.

I'm still a believer but I don't know why I've never been a natural All I do is try, try, try

oof this is just... so Evie. For people like the NJBC, all the politics and scheming and everything comes naturally, but so does the effortlessly flawless illusion they put up. They turn seeming perfect into an art form, and the only time it takes any work is when they’re also trying to destroy each other. Evie has never felt like she has that. She doesn’t turn heads and part crowds just by walking into a room, she doesn’t have Serena’s magnetism or Blair’s ability to always get the last word, or Chuck’s “do not fuck with me” vibe, or Nate’s ability to convince people that he’s fine. She tries so hard and always feels like she comes up short, but she just keeps trying.

“I’m still a believer but I don’t know why” also fits really well with both the fact that Evie always tries to see the best in people, even when they’ve hurt her, and the fact that no matter how many horrible, traumatizing things have happened to her, Evie tries so desperately to hold onto the hope that it’ll eventually be okay

I'm still on that trapeze I'm still trying everything To keep you looking at me

I mean, this one honestly might be the most obvious? Her eating disorder. Going back to my last point, Evie doesn’t feel like she has the same natural magnetism or charisma as Serena and Blair. She doesn’t have the ability to make everyone fall in love with her with a smile (at least in her mind; Theo would beg to differ). She looks at her two older sisters who are just so stunning, at the way Blair always looks perfectly put together, at the way Serena can make being a mess look deliberate and desirable, and she feels like she always falls short in comparison, and she goes to dangerous lengths to try to achieve it.

Because I'm a mirrorball I'm a mirrorball I'll show you every version of yourself Tonight

And woo okay then onto This Is Me Trying, be prepared for some Evie angst!

I've been having a hard time adjusting I had the shiniest wheels, now they're rusting

Okay so this sort of goes back to the last point I was making in Mirrorball, with how hard Evie tries to feel like she belongs in the UES, and more importantly how hard she tries to look like she belongs, and that while Evie was always the dreamer and the optimist, she’s starting to lose that as she gets older.

But quite frankly, this relates even more to Serena leaving. Before that, Evie was always the hopeful one — no matter how flakey Serena got, no matter how often she bailed on her siblings for Georgina and a party, Evie always held onto the hope that Serena still loved them and would still be their sister again, eventually. But then Serena left, without so much as a goodbye, and that dream shatters for Evie, and she gives up on that hope — and as you know, that plays a big role in her pre-canon breakdown, as does her inability to adjust to not having her sister around, however unreliable she might have been.

I didn't know if you'd care if I came back I have a lot of regrets about that

Keeping with that last point, this is actually more Serena’s POV about Evie — with how she left things with them, especially with Evie (who she fought with just before meeting Georgina the night of the wedding), she really isn’t sure if Evie would actually want her to come back, and she really does regret the way everything happens (especially as she realizes that she really doesn’t fit into Evie’s family anymore)

Pulled the car off the road to the lookout Could've followed my fears all the way down And maybe I don't quite know what to say But I'm here in your doorway

This is another bit that’s more about the vibes and images that it gives me than the specific vibe, but the first two lines here always give me the strong vibe of someone standing at the edge of a cliff or rooftop, trying to decide whether or not to jump, and that fits painfully well with Evie and how desperately she tried to hold on through everything that happened pre-canon, no matter how tempting it was to just give in and get away from it all.

I just wanted you to know That this is me trying I just wanted you to know That this is me trying

Going back to Mirrorball, part of the tragedy of Evie Van Der Woodsen is just how hard she tries, at everything. She tries to fit in, she tries to be perfect, she tries to be okay, she tries to just keep pushing through every single bad thing that’s happened to her, even as she’s falling apart behind her mask.

They told me all of my cages were mental So I got wasted like all my potential

Again, there are really two meanings to this when it comes to Evie. First is just... Evie has a hell of a lot of issues, clearly, but people tend to be very dismissive of them. Once upon a time, Evie used to actually reach out for help, only to get met with “poor little rich girl” and being brushed off because her life seemed so perfect, what could she have to be upset about it? Eventually Evie starts to believe it too, and her own belief that she has no ‘real’ reason to be upset becomes a big part in her reaching her breaking point.

But also... There was a point when Evie tried to talk to Lily. She tried to tell her about how not okay she was, and tried to ask Lily for help, but Lily just dismissed her because she wasn’t willing to take responsibility for her own role in Evie’s issues. It became so consistent for a short period that eventually Evie found herself wondering if maybe she really was overreacting, which in turn led to her not asking anyone else for help or telling anyone else what was wrong — and unfortunately for Evie, this was such a pervasive element of her ongoing breakdown that ultimately no one would be able to help her with the rest of it without first helping her with this, and no one could help because she never told anyone else because she became convinced that she really was just being overly dramatic and sensitive

And my words shoot to kill when I'm mad I have a lot of regrets about that

I know I was just telling you about this (hence, I assume, this ask lmao) but like, this is very Evie. Evie is the nice one. Evie chooses to be the nice one. She could easily destroy basically anyone with a text or two to Gossip Girl, but she actively chooses not to, because she doesn’t want to hurt anyone else the way she’s been hurt. But when Evie does snap, she’s merciless. She throws Serena leaving them back in her face when Serena starts talking about how Lily would leave without saying goodbye, she tells Lily that she’s even worse at being a mother than she is at being a wife, she tells Bart that if he wants them to act like a family then he should learn to act like a father, she tells Dan that his complaints about the UES would hold more weight if he were’t so desperate for the advantages that come with it... hell, she gets Chuck off the ledge of the roof by going straight for the kill and reminding him that he promised he wouldn’t leave her — and then by throwing in a “but then again, I’m used to people breaking their promises.” And afterwards, she always regrets the things she says. She feels like just because they’re hurting her doesn’t mean she needs to hurt them back.

But the best example I have of this is with Jenny. In general, Evie does tend to lash out more at Jenny than at most other people, because Jenny hurts her more than most, but more specifically this goes back to what I was saying in Mirrorball about season 3. Evie holds her tongue as Jenny torments her, because she doesn’t want to cause problems between everyone else. But then Jenny goes after Eric and Jonathan, and Evie reaches that breaking point — and, well, Evie did learn from the best. She’s well aware of Eric’s plan to steal her cotillion date, and she helps with that, but more importantly she stops Nate from stepping in. She waits until the announcer has been informed that Nate will be escorting her and then asks Nate to talk and tells him what’s been going on with Jenny — Nate is furious on her behalf but also doesn’t want to leave Jenny without an escort, at which point Evie pulls out her phone to show him that Eric had just given her an all-clear, that Jenny’s turn had already gone. Later Evie feels bad for humiliating Jenny like that, but as much as she regrets it, her bigger regret is that she knows that if she had a second chance, she would do the exact same thing.

I was so ahead of the curve, the curve became a sphere Fell behind all my classmates and I ended up here

Evie has always been the exception. No freshmen at the masquerade — except Evie. Ivy Week is for juniors — and Evie. Cotillion is for juniors — and Evie. So on, so forth. Because of their connections to the NJBC, and their parents, the twins and Theo have always been able to be ahead of the rest of their classmates. And most of the time Evie doesn’t mind it, she’d rather do all these things when she has Blair to help her. But then you get to things like the s3 cotillion and, even though her own was absolutely perfect, watching all of her classmates go through the preparation without her leaves her feeling hollow and disconnected.

(tbh, as far as I’ve been able to tell — though I might be wrong — you can be presented at more than one cotillion, so Evie might end up persuading Lily to let her register again, despite having done it two years ago, more for the connection to her peers than for the actual cotillion aspect)

Pourin' out my heart to a stranger But I didn't pour the whiskey

I mean this one feels like it might seem a bit obvious with regards to pouring her heart out to her therapist, but in all honesty, she never really did. What it really makes me think of is the scene in Poison Ivy, when Eric, Jenny, Theo, and Evie all talk, and Eric and Evie tell Jenny about the Ostroff Centre and everything. At this point, Jenny is still basically a stranger to them, but for some reason they both end up opening up to her all the same

And as for “but I didn’t pour the whiskey”, it’s actually a very important part of Evie’s story! Evie doesn’t drink anything harder than champagne — she’s seen Serena, she knows that Serena’s drinking is more of an addiction that she would ever admit, and she’s terrified of ending up like that, so she just doesn’t drink. Right up until Chuck disappears after Bart’s funeral — and when Eric is trying to explain to Chuck that they’re still his family and they still want/need him in their lives, the first thing he says to try to drive home his point is to tell Chuck that Evie has started drinking.

I just wanted you to know That this is me trying I just wanted you to know That this is me trying At least I'm trying

(already talked about this!)

And it's hard to be at a party When I feel like an open wound

This is honestly just an overall vibe for Evie! I don’t have a specific party in mind or anything (or I do but there are several — namely Jenny’s party, the opera, the housewarming, the masquerade, every thanksgiving, and like many more but I’ll leave it here for now) but Evie has a very hard time with being expected to go to these parties and be totally put together and play the perfect daughter even when she feels like she’s completely falling apart and just wants to curl up in bed for days

It's hard to be anywhere these days When all I want is you

This also applies to a few different situations, both romantic and platonic! The first scene it made me think of was Jenny’s party, when Evie is still heartbroken over the breakup and then Jenny outs her and it’s just rough. But it also makes me think of the White Party and how Evie is feeling guilty over her crush on Theo because like, ex boyfriends are off limits, and feeling weird and uncomfortable with Eric having brought Jenny despite the fact that things between Evie and Jenny haven’t gotten better since Jenny outed her. Honestly though it also really makes me think of the opera in s2 but in a platonic sense, because Chuck is there and all Evie wants is to be able to talk to Chuck and really have her brother back, but Chuck is still holding her at arm’s length because of how guilty he’s feeling at this point for everything that’s happened since Bart’s funeral

You're a flashback in a film reel On the one screen in my town

This one gave me more White Party vibes, specifically with the moment that Evie sees Jenny and then Jenny saying hi, which is the first thing she’s actually said to her since the Outing Incident, and how hard it is for Evie because god she’s still so hurt and Jenny’s never even tried to apologize but then at the same time with Jenny there and Theo and Eric also there it’s too easy for her to feel like it was the beginning of Freshman year, when all four of them were the best of friends and almost a functional version of the NJBC and as much as Evie is still hurt and pissed she also just really misses the way things used to be, back even before any dating started within the group.

And I just wanted you to know That this is me trying (Maybe I don't quite know what to say) I just wanted you to know That this is me trying At least I'm trying

(already talked about this!)

And anyways, there are my lyric breakdowns for Evie Van Der Woodsen, now I’m feeling all sad about her again

#lizziesxltzmxn #ask #answered #evie van der woodsen #about evie

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tswiftslover · 4 years ago

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I spent too many hours listening to folklore and then falling for these lines, here you have my favourite lines on each song. Bare with me because this is a long post!

the 1:

- you know the greatest films of all time were never made

- but it would've been fun, if you would've been the one

- you know the greatest loves of all time are over now

cardigan:

- when you are young, they assume you know nothing

- once in twenty lifetimes

- you drew stars around my scars

- i knew you tried to change the ending;peter losing wendy

- but i knew you'd linger like a tattoo kiss, i knew you'd haunt all of my what-ifs

the last great american dynasty:

- "how did a middle-class divorcée do it?"

- their parties were tasteful, if a little loud

- it must have been her fault his heart gave out

- free of women with madness

- i had a marvelous time ruining everything

exile:

- with his arms around your body. laughin', but the joke's not funny at all

- like you'd get your knuckles bloody for me

- i think i've seen this film before, and i didn't like the ending

- i'm not your problem anymore, so who am i offending now?

- there is no amount of crying i can do for you

- we always walked a very thin line

- you didn't even see the signs

my tears ricochet:

- and if i'm on fire, you'll be made of ashes, too

- if i'm dead to you, why are you at the wake? cursing my name, wishing i stayed

- what a ghostly scene

- you hear my stolen lullabies

- you had to kill me, but it killed you just the same

mirrorball:

- i'm a mirrorball, i'll show you every version of yourself tonight

- and when i break, it's in a million pieces

- you'll find me on my tallest tiptoes, spinning in my highest heels, love

- i can change everything about me to fit in

- i'm still a believer, but i don't know why. i've never been a natural, all i do is try, try, try

seven:

- please picture me in the trees

- love you to the moon and to saturn

- please picture me in the weeds, before i learned civility; i used to scream ferociously any time i wanted

- cross my heart, won’t tell no other and though i can't recall your face i still got love for you

august:

- your back beneath the sun, wishin' i could write my name on it

- and i can see us twisted in bedsheets, august sipped away like a bottle of wine, 'cause you were never mine

- so much for summer love and saying "us", 'cause you weren't mine to lose

- but do you remember? remember when i pulled up and said "get in the car"

this is me trying:

- could've followed my fears all the way down

- they told me all of my cages were mental, so i got wasted like all my potential

- you're a flashback in a film reel on the one screen in my town

illicit affairs:

- what started in beautiful rooms, ends with meetings in parking lots

- a drug that only worked, the first few hundred times

- don't call me "kid," don't call me "baby". look at this godforsaken mess that you made me, you showed me colors you know i can't see with anyone else

invisible string:

- i used to think i would meet somebody there

- and isn't it just so pretty to think, all along there was some invisible string tying you to me?

- a string that pulled me out of all the wrong arms, right into that dive bar

- one single thread of gold tied me to you

- hell was the journey but it brought me heaven

- time, wondrous time gave me the blues and then purple-pink skies

mad woman:

- what do you sing on your drive home?

- does she mouth, "fuck you forever"?

- every time you call me crazy, i get more crazy

- there's nothing like a mad woman

- now i breathe flames each time i talk

- what a shame she went mad, you made her like that

epiphany:

- with you i serve, with you i fall down, watch you breathe in, watch you breathing out

- something med school did not cover someone's daughter, someone's mother

- only twenty minutes to sleep but you dream of some epiphany

- just one single glimpse of relief to make some sense of what you've seen

betty:

- you can't believe a word she says most times, but this time it was true

- but if i just showed up at your party, would you have me? would you want me?

- i dreamt of you all summer long

- will it patch your broken wings?

- standing in your cardigan kissin' in my car again

peace:

- no, i could never give you peace

- but i would die for you in secret the devil's in the details, but you got a friend in me

- i'd give you my sunshine, give you my best but the rain is always gonna come if you're standin' with me

hoax:

- my only one, my smoking gun, my eclipsed sun

- your faithless love's the only hoax i believe in

- i am ash from your fire

- you knew the hero died so what's the movie for?

- you knew it still hurts underneath my scars

- my kingdom come undone, my broken drum, you have beaten my heart

So yeah, thank you again @taylorswift for giving me another album to be the soundtrack of my nonexistent love life and just being around for so many years🤍✨ keep shining and being the lovely human you are. I love you.

@taylornation

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