#why does the Clara part has many kisses ??

[thetorturedlovergirl]

What would you do if I pull up in this beauty? 😍

[lanawinterscigarettes]

Hiding Away (Clara Oswald x reader)

Summary: when you distance yourself due to insecurities over your body, Clara does her best to make you feel better

Warnings: hurt/comfort, some angst, reader has body image issues but it's not specified why

A/N: I've been feeling pretty down lately due to dysphoria so I decided to be self indulgent and write this to help comfort me. I kept the reasoning behind the reader's body image issues vague so anyone who has troubles or insecurities about how they look can read this. just know that I love and cherish each and every one of you that have difficulties with how you look, regardless of the reason. it's okay if you have trouble accepting your physical body as a part of who you are. you're not broken or any less of a person for it ❤

Clara hadn't seen you all day. In fact, she'd barely seen you the entire week, and while that wasn't entirely uncommon after a disasterous trip with the Doctor (you'd been attacked by the Daleks yet again) it was troubling to her just how little she saw of you.

That's how she ended up standing in front of the bedroom you had on the TARDIS. She really didn't want to pry, but she was starting to get concerned. Plus, she missed you.

Bringing her hand up to the door, she lightly tapped her knuckles against the wood before calling out softly. "Are you in there? It's been awhile since I've seen you and I'm a little worried."

She heard you call out a muffled "I'm fine" through the door. Clara waited in hopes that perhaps you'd elaborate, sighing to herself when you didn't.

"I'm going to come in, if that's alright with you?" She could've said it more as a command, but she posed her words as a question instead, so you'd feel a tad bit more comfortable with her sudden intrusion.

When she still got no answer, she turned the knob and slowly pushed open the door. The lights were out, but from what she could tell you were curled up in a ball on your bed, surrounded by a mountain of blankets.

Clara frowned at the sight, knowing it must be something truly bad to have you acting like this. "Sweetheart?" She called out tentatively as she walked over.

You let out a muffled grunt in response, peeking part of your face out a bit so she could see you. "Hi," you mumbled softly.

She gave you a gentle smile as she took as seat down on the edge of your bed. "Hello, darling. Are you alright?" She carefully asked, bringing her hand up to rest on what she assumed was your back, hoping to comfort you.

"Mm." You closed your eyes and muttered out a soft reply. "I haven't been feeling well recently. Been having problems with my body and how I look."

At your admission of what was really going on, Clara felt her heart break. So that was why you'd been hiding away. "Oh, sweetheart..." She whispered in a sorrowful tone as she knew exactly what you were talking about, even if you didn't say it in so many words. "Darling, I'm so sorry. May I touch you?"

She was careful in asking for your permission to touch you first, knowing how you'd sometimes rather to be comforted from a distance, but much to her delight you nodded your head before letting out a soft "Okay".

She nodded her head in turn before getting down on the bed next to you. As she pulled you close, she was careful not to shift or move your blanket off of you in any way, not wanting to raise your discomfort levels, even by accident.

You allowed her to cradle you close to her chest, nestling against her almost as if you were a small woodland creature who was trying to stay warm for the winter. "Thank you for being here. I really appreciate it," you spoke to her in a quiet voice. "I'm sorry for being so distant lately."

"It's alright, sweetheart. I understand completely, there's no need for you to apologize." Clara leaned her face down and pressed a loving kiss to where she thought your head might be. "I'll be here for as long as you may need me."

You felt as her hand moved up and down your back in a soothing nature while she added, "And just so you know, there's nothing 'wrong' with how you look. I know that might be difficult for you to believe right now, darling, but it's true."

Tears filled your eyes as you felt yourself become emotional. "Thank you..." You choked out while pressing your face into her chest. "Thank you, Clara.... I love you..."

The brunette felt her heart soar when you told her you loved her, even though you'd said it before numerous times. "And I love you," she reply before kissing your head again. "And I'll always be here for you if you need me. Okay?"

You didn't say anything else, but she knew you heard her from the way you grabbed her hand and held it close. The two of you stayed there like that for a good, long while, and even though it didn't diminish your awful feelings completely it did feel nice to have someone there to help take your mind off it, at least for a little while.

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[faulix]

hi felix ! if i can ask, at what point does faux fall in love with u ? (idk anything abt his media so id also love to hear context if youd want to share!!) (@dmclr)

oh my god. clara buckle up i'm about to hit you with some faulix lore

so. faux doesn't realize he's fallen in love with me at first. he's just in this state of pining and yearning and just "why am i always thinking about you and being close to you" and he doesn't know what to do about it and he's certainly not going to act on it. it's after we have the big 3 of a trio that he has more of this abundance of feelings, but honestly part of it was love at first sight. he had heard rumors of me and thought i was a cool writer. i think he was surprised when he learned i'm really just. honestly kind of a nerd who just likes art and graffiti and skating. but maybe that's what led him to falling for me harder. he had more of a human behind his desires rather than the image of what he thought was amazing.

and something key to remember here, as to why he wouldn't realize his own feelings, is that he has his own demons he's hiding. he's been hiding his deepest desires of becoming all city to the point of entitlement, him using his cop father to cover his tracks, and he's not going to let anyone in that could discover that. well too bad! i also like him and i get to kiss him and throw all of that out of the window! he ends up walking this delicate line but god does it feel good just to have my affection to him. he'll push his own demons aside just for longer of it

(and this is all before like. the key points of the game. before the betrayal. and the decapitation. and the body swapping)

we go through a lot ok 😔 like there's a level in which i'm still not sure how HE gets his head back on his body but the second i saw him, i still wanted him (again despite the decapitation) (i can explain on this. brc is one Hell of a Game) i think there's a level in which he fell twice. because he realized i was going to show him a sense of love he was deprived of that the first time around wasn't going to fix. we're like two magnets you can't separate, we have glue stuck between us. it's never been perfect but i think we find ways to surpass so many of our own and shared struggles to fall in love with one another over and over again

[dailywhistledown]

Dearest reader,

The festivities were certainly as delightful as the company, for this writer was fantasied by the chaos and scandals that laid in their midst. Who knew that one night could pose so many opportunities for my comments? It were almost as if you made it too easy for me to fixate on the wrongdoings of our latest social elites.

It was difficult to miss the proximity of a Miss Kate Sharma and Viscount Bridgerton -- though, this did not last for long, as it appears the two had a disagreement, and thus parted ways with anguish in the air. Who knows what is truly in store for these love birds, but one things for certain -- if love is in the air, then he will not like the intentions of Simon Basset and Colby Ledger who made sure to indulge in Miss Sharma's company whilst the Viscount was 'pre-occupied'. However, was such company bait for Viscount Bridgerton to see what he was missing? It is evident that we have not heard the last of this feud.

As per Bridgerton nature, a Mr Colin Bridgerton appears to have gotten himself into quite the predicament. Our 'wallflower' Penelope Featherington appears to have caught his eye. This writer has her reservations, after all, why would it take him this long to notice his close friend, of whom he had been writing to over his travels? We all know writing to anyone other than family is forbidden, and Mr Bridgerton is no less familiar with this rule. Hidden in the shadows Colin stole a kiss, though it did not last long before Miss Featherington was seen fleeing the scene. Do we feel he has perhaps broken her heart, so soon? It was lucky to see a certain Montague was there to look after dear Penelope -- be careful Colin, you may be too late for this wallflower.

Did anyone notice the frown that remained on a certain Daphne Bridgerton's face this evening? It is certain that this diamond was left high and dry by someone who has caught her eye. Prince Luis -- who appears to have caught a fair share of ladies eyes this evening, for right, or wrong reasons. Sadly, Luis seems pre-occupied preparing to court a Phoebe Pendlebury. This writer is certain this is of new knowledge, a rather fast paced engagement, don't you agree? This writer awaits the reaction of Phoebe's brothers, Arthur and Graham, whom were not consulted prior to such arrangements -- let the chaos commence.

Keeping with the Pendlebury's, it appears they are all having troubles with love. Graham, his wife no where in sight, and flirting with no other than Lady Eleanor. Scandalous -- just the way this writer likes it. Though careful Eleanor, we wouldn't want you to taint your own name, with a married man, no less. Arthur, reunited with former love Amelie, fighting against all in which they believed to be true, turns out to be a lie. Will these lovers reunite? or will there be problems to arise when she realises Arthur hasn't simply waited for her? This writer saw Defne speaking with the lord, perhaps it's her turn in love?

Marquis Hector Darrington, and his wife appear to have returned to London. This reader is happy on such occasions, especially with Sophia's prior history with the Viscount. I do wonder what his reaction may be to her premature return, in the midst of him having trouble in love. Though, the couple do appear to be having their own troubles -- I do wonder if this is because of jealousy, or something more? With Sophia's past, we are sure to expect scandal.

This writer does not miss a thing -- such as the kiss between a certain Sebastian and Clara. A rather sweet display, though will her brother Kerem agree to such indecencies? Though a certain Kerem, his fiancee not in sight, so perhaps he has his own problems to fight?

A certain Edwina Sharma was seen speaking with Prince Friedrich, though, it appears she was none-the-wiser of his heritage. For one night only, Friedrich got to live a 'normal' life, but this writer has sadly, burst that bubble. Rather sweet sights seen between the both of them. Though, naïve as Miss Edwina may be, had not noticed how fond a certain Miss Agnes is of her.

The evening brought many people together, including old flames Owen and Delilah, and newer potentials such as Andrew and Florence.

This reader is keen to see how the above cope with scandals being revealed, for we know , it'll be as scandalous as the night prevailed.

For I am sure scandals will follow suit, and for what is it worth -- i'll be watching.

Yours truly,

Lady Whistledown.

[sonntam]

Replying to @clenchinggjjgv here, since it's not so easy to talk in replies.

You know, this is exactly why it's hard to talk about Clara's route in particular. There are several layers here and I am not certain if I understand Clara's route in its entirety. Especially with the meta part I fail to see how it adds anything to the narrative... but feel free to convince me otherwise.

Game as Reality layer: on this layer you mentioned Clara kissing the forehead of the Bound, letting them become sacrifices. I really like this part of the game, as it's compelling and interesting... but there is very, very little in that which is not conservative. Seven scape goats saves the town! This is very much business as usual. Few sinners save the many. Is this utopia?

Polyhedron is a dream. It's boundless imagination, possibility not to be restrained by the body and by mortality and other pesky things... it's a miracle.

And still I am strongly questioning how a plotline about saving both the Polyhedron AND the town is not conservative. You try to change everything... except by not changing anything at the core. Somehow humans will just start shedding their larva body and become more than human.

We know that Dankovsky and Burakh don't have all the answers. I also don't think that Clara has quite gotten there either.

(I mean, what about that wonderful convo Clara has with General Block, saying that she will follow his army and with her saintly protection his army will become invincible? Heck yeah, military & religious marriage FTW!)

It does make for an interesting story. Part of what makes it compelling is that it gives the player what it essentially works: a way to save both the Town and the Polyhedron. Please change, but no change.

Do you see a path to progress or to meaningful change here? I myself don't. Maybe I am too cynical here, but how does desperately holding on to things create progress? It is very much utopical thinking. Just daydream a little harder, just overcome the body (and smear it with a few willing sacrifices) and it will all work out!

Sure, we are playing Pathologic, the Utopia game, but this is what I mean by saccharine conservative fantasy. Change will just happen, like magic.

2. Game as a Game layer (Power That Be layer): It's a game kids play to explore certain concepts.

How do you see this layer? I myself don't care about it that much, but I don't see how exactly it is all that progressive or conservative. It is a lot to declare a children's game either one or the other I think, it falls out of the dichotomy altogether.

This is why I am ignoring it for the most part. If you have anything that you want to elaborate on here, let me know.

What is most Russian about Pathologic is the saccharine desire to find utopia in the past.

The kids are a reflection of their parents... a good mother has a good daughter, like Capella. A "bad" mother begets Maria.

The character of Burakhs gets passed on from father to son... while the mother is a mere reflection of the town which dissolves the Kin heritage which Burakh and Isidor try to hold on to.

The hope is that the children will be like their parents, only, a little bit better. Still the same in all the ways that matter. A leader only sires leaders. And biggest failure a mother can have is to be barren and purposeless...

The classic conservative leanings are so, so strong.

God forbid anything meaningfully changes, ever. Stretch the mind, but find comfort in the old unchanging structures.

[hauntedbythefanficsofmypast]

Blacklisted

"Blacklisted…" Marinette whispered her face blank as she stared at Chloe's worried face. "Adrien and Lila had Gabriel blacklist me." Tears gathered in the corners of her eyes as she choked back sobs, she covered her face with her hands. Chloe moved quickly pulling her shaking friend into her arms. "What am I going to do Chloe? Fashion was my future-and-and they ruined it for me. Four years of college all for nothing." Marinette sobbed into Chloe's shoulder as both girls sank to the ground.

"I don't know Marinette, I really don't know." Chloe said quietly she pulled back and pulled a handkerchief out of her bag. She brushed it across Marinette's cheeks wiping away the tears. "My mother confronted him and he refused to unblacklist you. It ended in a screaming match and mother declaring that Bourgeois would never associate with them again. Mother has been trying to counter the blacklist but Agreste has gotten too far already Mari." Marinette sniffled nodding as Tikki and Pollen flew over to their holders tentatively, the other Kwami remained near Pollen's little mansion.

"There is nothing that can be done? There has to be something!" Tikki said with anger clear in her voice. Marinette gave her a sad smile holding out her hand for Tikki to sit in it. Pollen landed in Chloe's open hand curling her arms around Chloe's thumb.

"No Tikki there is nothing we can do. We just have to move on." Marinette said they could all hear the anguish in her voice. She took a deep breath stopping herself from crying. "Plagg," she called softly , causing the Kwami to fly over. "normally I wouldn't allow this, but I think Gabriel has a streak of bad luck coming don't you?" Plagg was silent before her let out a loud cackle flying around Marinette's head.

"Oh kid, you're my favorite Ladybug for sure! What do you say Tikki, want to take away his creativity?" Tikki frowned part of her wanted to join in, but part of her pointed out that she should be the better person. "Come on Sugar Cube, I know you want to get payback for your chosen." Plagg said softly, smirking more when Tikki sighed and nodded. 

"But only once." She said looking at him with her own glare.

"It's funny," Audrey commented during dinner, she looked up with a smirk. "ever since Gabriel made the mistake of blacklisting you six months ago his designs have really dropped." She let out a laugh before taking a sip of her wine. "On top of that he has not only lost workers, but I heard there is a scandal going on with his son and the model of his!" Chloe snorted at that shaking her head, she took a bite of her steak. She glanced over at Marinette sending her a gentle smile, Marinette returned it before turning back to Audrey. "Mari dear, have you decided on what you want to do? I told you once I have absolutely no problem with you remaining here. On top of that I am more than willing to help you sell your designs under the acronym MDC like you've been doing with Jagged." Marinette glanced down at her food before looking up with a small smile.

"I am going to keep designing for Jagged and Clara. However I will not for others

, no, I have other plans now. Audrey you like my food, pastries, and weird drinks, yes?" Audrey glanced at Chloe in confusion before nodding.

"Yes I find it pretty amazing that you can make pastries from all over the world. Your apple pie is my favorite, although it is the reason that I have to work out so much." The comment caused the two young women to burst into soft laughter. "What does this have to do with anything?" Marinette smiled and placed her elbows on the table resting her chin on one hand. She smirked slightly thinking over her plan. 

"You see they derailed my dream just a bit, yes, but I have two loyal customers so I'm not completely stuck. I am not a one trick pony, I have a lot of talents." The mother and daughter were silent both confused, causing Marinette to laugh softly. "I was raised in a bakery, and my Great Uncle is a world renowned chef. I think a restaurant is in my future." Audrey smirked as she held her wine glass up.

"You see Mari, this is why you're one of my favorites, you never let anything keep you down. You'll have my backing and my husband's as well. With Chloe's help we are going to make your restaurant a hit." She shared a smile with her daughter knowing that Marinette's restaurant would be a hit when it opened. "Just one question Mari, what is the theme?" Marinette smirked looking over at Chloe with a twinkle in her eye.

"It's going to be subtlety themed around Paris's heros. Ladybug, Lynx(Felix), Viperion, Ryuko, Queen Bee and current Honeywell. Each hero will have their own signature dish. That is their personal favorite, Ladybug's is macaroons with her famous spotted design. Lynx's is Soupe à l'oignon, and so on. Desserts will be specially designed after their hero., While meals will be served on dishes resembling their costumes." 

“Well, you know you’ll have my full backing. Once you pick the perfect location I will have construction workers on the site, and once they’re done interior decorators to listen to your every input! On top of that I will make sure to talk up your restaurant to every business partner I have.” Audrey declared gently dabbing around her mouth with a napkin. She placed the napkin down before standing up; she made her way to Chloe grabbing her daughter's face and kissing her forehead gently, before doing the same to Marinette. “Now it is time for me to retire to bed. Don’t stay up too late girls!” She waved walking to the door nodding when Butler Jean opened the door for her. “Much appreciate Jean.” She gave him a rare smile, one which he returned with his own. Chloe and Marinette shared a look giggling softly together as Jean closed the door behind Audrey.

“Well, Dupain-Cheng, shall we retire as well?” Chloe said mimicking her mother’s voice. Marinette snorted covering her face with her napkins as Butler Jean gave Chloe a stern look struggling to hide his own smile.

“It’s beautiful.” Audrey said in awe taking in her once protegees restaurant. The outside of the store was simple yet elegant. Cream bricks with black accents, the two large windows were slightly tinted and had the name written in elegant cursive. ‘Miraculous’ The outside sitting area was gated off with a station for the host that provided shade on particularly hot days. It was divided into different sections, for certain Parisian heroes. Ladybug, Lynx, Viperion, Ryuko, and Honeywell. Each section was styled after their hero, Marinette and the interior designers had managed to make it so the colors didn’t clash. Instead they gave off a look of abstract beauty. In the middle of the outside area sat one table that had a sign stating it was permanently reserved for the original Queen Bee. The table made Chloe shine with happiness that only doubled once she realized that there was also a table inside reserved just for her. The inside was much the same except in the middle of the restaurant their was another table for Chloe. There was a window that took up much of the back wall, displaying the kitchen where ten chefs were divided in two, each learning their heroes menu together. There were two hallways on either side, the right had the bathrooms and the left had five private rooms. Each styled after their hero. "I must say, I was unsure that you'd be able to fit their colors together. However, you and the interior designers pulled it off flawlessly. May I see the menus?" Marinette smirked a twinkle in her eye as she held up five menus.

"Five menus for each hero. Which one would you like to see? The waiters and waitresses are instructed to request what hero's menu they would like to eat from. Each has eight different meals, five deserts, one specialty drink, and specialty salad, the only thing they have in common is drinks. side salads and soups. Two waiters and two chefs for each hero, more will be added if needed. The chefs have their own spaces together in the kitchen."  Marinette surveyed the restaurant, a smile taking over her face as she took in her finished product. Butler Jean walked up placing a hand on her shoulder, his gentle smile already present.

"If I may break character for just a second, I must say and I'm sure Mistress Bourgeois and Mistress Chloe agree, I am quite proud of you Miss Marinette. You've truly outdone yourself." Chloe nodded and came up hugging Marinette's arm smiling at her as Marinette started to tear up. The tears didn't fall until Audrey placed her hand on the back of Marinette's head, a rare smile on her face.

"Thank you for everything." She whispered softly, smiling brightly at them.

"Don't bemused, it's just the news! Nadja Chamack back again! Good afternoon Paris! New in Paris today, I'm sure you have all heard of the hit restaurant Miraculous that only opened a week ago! Well Paris, I have the inside scoop for you today! I was invited by the owner of the restaurant just last night! Now I am sure you are all wondering! Nadja, how did you get a direct invitation?! I was shocked too! Only to discover the owner of the restaurant was my goddaughter Marinette Dupain-Cheng! Marinette is twenty-three years old and now owns one of the most popular restaurants in Paris! Let me tell you! The restaurant is absolutely beautiful and styled after our heroes, you all know Ladybug is my personal favorite. So Marinette set up a private room for my daughter and me. She has five private rooms, all designated with a specific hero, so obviously my room was Ladybug's! I must say the restaurant is truly one of a kind! Marinette has out done herself, and its not just me saying that. Jagged Stone, Audrey Bourgeois, Clara Nightingale, and even some famous actors and musicians have all gone to Miraculous this past week. Each one had raving reviews, so much so that many celebrities and even some heroes are coming to Paris just to eat there. Pictures on Jagged's and Clara's Instagrams show them posing with a bright eyed Marinette, in one of the private rooms together! I think Paris agrees with me when I say this, congratulations Marinette, and I must say this to my goddaughter, I'm so proud of you Marinette. Now it’s time for sports-" Lila paused the tv glaring at is as she stared at the picture of Marinette between Jagged and Clara. She screamed throwing the remote at the wall, causing Adrien to tense up in their share kitchen. He sighed glaring down at his coffee only sparing a glance at the tv as he stirred. 

'When will she stop causing problems, I seriously thought she was more mature than this. But no she just has to keep thrusting herself into the spotlight knowing it'll piss Lila off.' He shook his head turning to watch his fiance finish her tantrum, as a smirk covered her face, a plan clearly forming. Only briefly did he wonder what the new lie was going to be this time. 'I am surprised she didn't just give up when we ruin her dream. Lila and father thought for sure that would break her.' He glanced down at his right hand where the ring use to rest anger growing in his chest. 'She deserves it, if she had just kept her mouth shut things would be different. No, she had to tell Ladybug everything when she discovered my identity. If it wasn't for her I'd still be Chat Noir, things would be different. I'd be with the love of my life and out of my father's control. This is all her fault, she deserves to be ruined.' Lila turned to him with a predatory smirk, her eyes glinting in the light as she walked up to him. She wrapped her arms around his neck leaning against him standing on her toes as she lifted one leg into the air. She bit her lip before kissing him and pulling back their lips barely touching as they stared into each others eyes. 

" We're going to get reservations at her crappy little restaurant, and we are going to destroy it and her name for good." Adrien smiled and placed his mug down wrapping his arms around her waist. He pulled her closer kissing her deeply before pulling back

"I'll have Nathalie set them up for us under my name. Now go get dressed, we have a photoshoot at 5." He let Lila go picking up his phone and texting Nathalie as Lila went to the shared room in their penthouse. He picked his coffee back up and starred at the picture of Marinette on the tv a smirk crossing his face. 

Two days later however they were all furious when the reservations were denied under all their names. They were only given reservations after using a fake name. When the day came they were dressed to impress and arrived in a limo. Lila smirked before letting her mask fall into place, as paparazzi turned to them and started taking pictures. She wrapped her arms around Adrien's arm giggling and waving at them until they reached the door only to be stopped by two guards and a hostess who was looking down at her book. "Name?"

"We are under Anthony Stewart." Adrien said smiling charmingly. The host ran her finger down the book till she came to the name. She nodded and looked up glancing at them before turning to the guards only to turn back surprised.

"I apologize we do have a Anthony Stewart down for reservations but you are not him." Adrien smiled nodding to her glancing at Lila. 

"Yes, you see my assistant set up the reservation for us under his name." The hostess gave them a tight smile before nodding politely. 

"Yes we do allow that to be done here. Unfortunately I am still not allowed to let you in." She said holding back a smirk at their shocked faces as the cameras began to take even more pictures.

"What do you mean you're not allowing us in?!" Lila said anger displayed clearly on her face.

"I'm truly sorry, here Maya let me take over while you take care of our other guests." Marinette said as she stepped out of the restaurant. She hair was pulled into an elegant up do, still wearing her signature black earrings. However she had a simple pairing of silver glasses on and was wearing a pink pencil skirt a white ruffled top and a black blazer. Her nails were a soft pink matching her toes as she wore black open toed heels. Both Adrien and Lila saw the glint in her eye even though she was smiling politely at them. "I really hoped you would all take the hint when reservations under your name were all rejected. You see I refuse to allow petty drama cause problems for my restaurant, and I'm afraid that you two bring drama with you where ever you go. However I can see my hint was not noticed so I'll tell you myself. Lila Rossi, Adrien Agreste, you two and your families are banned from setting foot into my restaurant. So sorry, but after you two repeatedly bullied me, spread lies about me and tried to ruin my future, I simply couldn't find it in myself to allow you in. Now please leave, your blocking other customers." Marinette turned and began to walk back into the restaurant until Adrien grabbed her arm dragging her back roughly.

"Now listen here Marinette!" He started until Marinette turned to him no fear in her eyes as she drew her free arm back and decked him. Adrien released her arm falling backwards holding his nose in pain, Marinette falling to the ground holding her arm gingerly.

"How dare you!?!" Lila snapped dropping down and wrapping her arms around Adrien's shoulders protectively, glaring at Marinette attempting to play the victims. "Thats it! We are sueing you for everything you have, I can't believe you just assaulted Adrien!" She smirked as she watched an officer get out of her car and advance on them. "Officer! Officer please arrest her! She just assaulted my fiance!" Lila cried out as tears began to fall. 

"I'm afraid I'll be taking Mr. Agreste into custody instead Miss Rossi. I was here the entire time and I watched him grab Miss Dupain-Cheng roughly. He assaulted her and she defended herself." Sabrina said staring down at the two as Lila looked up at her in shock. Another officer pulled up with his lights on and stepped out of the car. "Raincomprix, an ambulance is on the way to fix his nose before I take him in. Please make sure to get the photographers names, emails and numbers so that we can get pictures and possibly videos. Then take Miss Dupain-Cheng statement along with pictures of her and her arm, I'll take his pictures. After that get witness statements." Sabrina nodded before pulling out her notebook and walking over to the paparazzi. A few minutes later an ambulance pulled up and took care of Adrien before he was escorted to the back of the police car. Lila stood watching in shock, her mind running a mile a minute, she was quick to flee the scene once she realized pictures were still being taken.

The next day they were all over the news and everyone was on Marinette's side. Videos and pictures were all over social media and Gabriel's lawyers told him that there was no way they could save Adrien from being guilty unless they took a plea bargain. Adrien would admit his guilt and instead of jail time he had to pay Marinette a settlement and was given a restraining order to not come within fifty feet of her for five years. Gabriel's brand took a great hit and for a while Lila and Adrien couldn't step outside with out receiving glares or being refused business. Their reputations were dearly hurt and it didn't look like they'd ever be fixed. While Marinette was higher than ever everyone viewing her as a strong and amazing person after she didn't let his attack hold her back. This drove them crazy but they knew they couldn't do anything, Lila however decided that Hawkmoth just needed to target Marinette. Unluckily for them, it was that targeting that gave away Gabriel's identity to Ladybug and the Miraculous team.

A few months later it was breaking news when the Miraculous team brought in Gabriel, Natalie, and Lila and exposed them as Hawkmoth and Mayura, and that Lila was working with them. Adrien was spared after Ladybug revealed that he was Chat Noir. Everyone was ecstatic, parties were thrown and statues of the heros were placed in different parts of the city. It was shortly after that it was revealed that Gabriel blacklisted many people and allowed his designers to steal work in the hopes that they'd get others akumatized. Marinette was ecstatic that her name in fashion was cleared but she told the press she wasn't planning on going back into fashion. That only a few people would receive her designs, and they would only be those that Clara or Jagged recommended. It was a few months later that Gordon Ramsey visited her restaurant everyone was expecting Ramsey to find something to tear apart and were extremely surprised when he made a tweet praising Marinette's meals and her chefs talents. It actually spurred a friendship between the two and soon Gordon was added to the list of people that received her designs. After this everyone was going to Marinette's restaurant, they had reservations book 6 months out. Every day there is new pictures of celebrities at the restaurant Marinette was the new name in restaurants and cooking. She even agreed to star on some cooking shows. Her favorite guest spot was on Nailed it. The show was themed after heroes Jacques Torres made cupcakes specialized after America's heros, while Marinette made a five tier cake, each tier representing a different Parisian hero. Marinette lost it when she saw the cupcakes for Batman and Robin she couldn't stop laughing and immediately took pictures. Marinette and Jacques held multiple conversations in French, both struggling not to laugh as Nicole made faces at them. When Marinette pulled out the money gun she flicked her head done and a pair of Eiffel Tower shaped glasses covered her face. She looked at Nicole seriously and nodded before saying she was ready to complete the mission. This cause Nicole to burst into laughter.  After the winner was announced Marinette made another announcement, all three contestants and their family had an all expenses paid trip to Paris and a free meal at her restaurant Miraculous. It was shortly after that, that Marinette began to open more restaurants starting in each heroes city. Twenty-five percent of their earnings went to either the heros in question or a charity that they picked. Marinette's restaurants got popular quickly and soon she was named the youngest billionaire and only twenty-five years old. Everyone was shocked when majority of her money was put towards charity and thar she began different foundations to help others. She even began programs to pay for peoples schooling in university and colleges. Soon she was invited to charity events all over the world, from the Maria Stark Foundation to the Martha Wayne charity Gala. When she is twenty-six Marinette moves out of Audrey's penthouse and travels between different homes until settling down into a penthouse in New York. Audrey and Chloe both follow her over Audrey simply returning and establishing New York as her base of operations once again.

[goji-pilled]

MK-S: Anthony is surprised that whenever he argues with his sister, she more often than not tends to be the one that ends up with a cooler head…but what actually happens is that whenever she gets too frustrated Klarissa stops time so she can vent and yell, and basically get everything out of her system and she calms down after prolonged one sided conversations. (Regular sibling arguments and temper tantrums, not full on Witch Tantrums.)

(As a side note, Homura has started to always carry a paperback book in her pocket so that she has something to do when she hears her daughter venting in stopped time, and if she determines that the best action at the time is to let Klarissa work out the problem on her own.)

MK-S: I like to imagine that there are times where Phil doesn’t help Klarissa; before you judge, let me explain. In order to grow, we must overcome our own struggles. Phil, even as a cosmic horror (and/or as influence of the Clara Doll part of him used to be), does not want to become a crutch for Klarissa, nor some “get out of all my problems cause I have Cthulhu on speed dial” card. As such, anything relative small like childhood bullying is something he wouldn’t attempt to stop (as dumb kids don’t deserve to be reduced to their base molecules for being dumb). Besides, it knows Klarissa is able to handle herself, and it will not let her grow up thinking she needs it to solve all her problems. (That said, there are some exceptions; namely the time a magical girl was about to kill Klarissa, about to shatter her grief seed…The punishment is…something I’m still working on, I’ve got the details, but I want to make a story for the event.)

As another side-note, I’ve got this funny visual in my head: Kindergartner Klarissa being picked on by some kids, an arm emerging from Klarissa’s hat, then Anthony putting a hand on its wrist saying “I got this.” And then proceeding to make the bullies apologize to his baby sister.

MK-S: I don’t recall, have we seen Hitomi’s reaction to Klarissa looking like her? (Or have they even met?) I think it’d be funny if, when Klarissa is tall enough, the two have a sort of secret handshake where they mirror each other’s movements for a bit before happily clapping hands. Maybe even make little random street performances out of it.

MK-S: On Halloween, Klarissa uses her hat as a trick-or-treat bag…it actually doesn’t really help as much as you’d think, because she’s still only going to so many houses.

Phil messes with a bit of the chocolate she gets, making it emerge as a detailed chocolate statue of the entire Quintet family. Kyoko and Mami are disturbed at the fact that Phil knows what they look like (down to the costumes they’re wearing at that moment), Nagisa is just happy Anthony, Yuma, and herself were included, and Yuma silently wonders why a chocolate Bebe is depicted on chocolate Nagisa’s shoulder, since no other witch forms are part of the statue…

MK-S: I think it’s be neat if the reason why Homura sometimes pulls Klarissa’s nerf guns, but child Klarissa never pulls Homura’s real guns, is because Phil keeps them away from Klarissa’s hat…As for why he doesn’t do the same for Homura, no one really knows; and Phil’s not exactly the type to “respond coherently” to questions…

All of these are *chefs kiss* you never fail to deliver bangers

[t-lostinworlds]

for the youtube thing can u plese do the mouth to mouth challenge, i really want u to write it cause u r like the best writer ever , way better then me

TH’s YouTube Extras: Mouth to Mouth Challenge

a/n: you are too sweet gosh asdfghjkl thank you angel. i hope you enjoy this lovely! ❤ oh and it’s suggestive in some parts but not much hehe.

☰ youtube channel | recent video

-:-:-:-:-

"Right, mouth to mouth challenge here we go!" Tom rubbed his hands together enthusiastically, gaze set on the camera as a wide grin played on his lips. "We each have to take the opposite sides of the food in our mouths and the first one to do as much as look away, loses the round. The overall loser gets to do a forfeit which will be decided by the boys."

You and Tom were both sitting side by side on the couch and much like before, the camera right in front. Harry was right behind it and this time he was joined by Tuwaine. Harrison was MIA given that he had errands to attend to.

"You seem a bit too excited," you teased.

Tom shrugged, turning to you with that charming grin. "I get to be so close to you and stare into those lovely, beautiful eyes, of course I'm excited."

"As if you don't already do that on a daily," you pointed out, amusement laced in your tone as you shook your head at your man.

"Yeah, I do. But I can never get enough of those gorgeous eyes, darling," he gushed, brown orbs glowing with adoration when it locked with yours, Tom flashing you that bright smile of his you always adore.

You beamed at him with a soft giggle, shaking your head before turning to the camera to shoot it a sympathetic smile. "He's just a walking ball of cheese guys, I apologise," you joked.

"As if she doesn't love it," Tom scoffed with a playful roll of his eyes, giving the camera a look before turning back to you. "Let's get into it shall we?"

"Let's."

Tom held his hand out. "First up," he paused, catching the candy—not so smoothly—that Tuwaine threw and then presenting it towards the camera. "Kit Kat."

"Break it like a sane person, Holland," you warned, Tom's laugh booming soon after your comment.

He knows how to eat a Kit Kat obviously, he does have brain cells. But other times when he feels like being an extra little shit, he breaks the bar the opposite direction on how you're supposed to, leaving you with uneven Kit Kat pieces. It honestly drives you up the wall all the damn time, Tom saying how he finds it so cute how you get riled up by a candy bar, hence why he does it whenever he can. It's one of the many ways he uses to press your buttons, all from love and affection of course.

Placing the tip of Kit Kat between his teeth, Tom leaned back on the couch, arm resting behind you as he shot you a nod. You moved closer, hand rested on his thigh as you took the opposite side. You two moved closer in fits of giggles as you ate the candy little by little, eyes locked securely that it was hard to determine on who would give up first. That until Tom decided to play dirty, literally.

He started groaning and moaning in a hush manner, pretending to enjoy the chocolate a bit too much. But you know what he was trying to do and given the proximity that you two are in, you can hear the sounds he was making very clearly and it was very distracting. It was when he shot you a wink that you pulled away, shaking your head to rid of the heat that coated your face.

Tom ate the rest of the chocolate with a hearty laugh. "I'd win this on a streak," he said smugly.

"Stop making those sounds Thomas," you complained in a whisper, Tom turning his head to look at you, acting all oblivious even though he knows what you meant.

"What sounds?"

You rolled your eyes.

A thought crossed your mind once you saw the next candy that Tuwaine tossed. You hummed to yourself with a nod. If Tom was going to play dirty then, might as well give him a taste of his own medicine.

"Sour belt this time," Tom said, showing the camera the candy over his palm like it's a make-up product. He did the same as before and placed the end of the strip between his lips.

Hand still firmly on his thigh, you started at the bottom since the candy was hanging down Tom's chin, keeping your gaze locked with his. Tom's eyes followed your form as you lowered yourself, orbs looking up at him with that all too familiar gloss. You darted your tongue out to take the candy between your lips before they started to move in a way that made Tom's insides churn. You looked at him through your lashes as you ate the candy inch by inch, giving his thigh a pointed squeeze. Tom choked in a breath at the sight, dropping the belt as he looked away with a low growl before things start to escalate in his head, knowing he can't hide it in his sweatpants.

A cheer erupted out of you as you sat straighter and turned to the camera, candy in mouth with both your hands thrown up in the air. "Point for me!" you laughed once you've eaten all of it.

Tom shook his head, gaze trained on the ground since his cheeks were now coated with a deep shade of red. "Not fair," he grumbled, the hand he had behind you picking at the material of the couch to distract his mind.

"What? I wasn't doing anything wrong," you hummed, tilting your head to the side as you looked at him with a pout.

It was Tom's turn to roll his eyes.

"Okay, last one," Tom said, catching the box of Jaffa cakes easily. He took one out and placed it between his teeth. This time, you had to move even closer to reach him since the length of the cake was much shorter than the previous candies.

As you started to lean in to take the other end, Tom dropped the Jaffa cake at the last minute to give you a loud—and very surprising—peck on your lips. The smack echoed around the room as you stared at him wide-eyed before your brain finally registered what had happened.

"Tom," you whined, dropping your head on his shoulder to hide the embarrassment on your face. Tom lets out a hearty laugh, wrapping his arms around your shoulders with a kiss landing on top of your head.

"She always gets shy whenever I give her random affections in public, or in this case, showing it online," he said towards the camera. "It's so freakin' adorable."

"Such a huge cheeseball," you grumbled before sitting up to meet his eyes. "You dropped the cake so I won. That makes it 2 for 1 so ha! You're doing the forfeit." You stuck your tongue out at him before turning to the camera with a proud glow on your face.

Tom shook his head with an adoring smile as he ogled at you fondly. He loves seeing you win, it's honestly the most endearing thing no matter how little the achievement and it makes him feel like he won himself.

"Totally worth it," Tom chuckled with a shrug.

"Until you see the forfeit," Harry quipped, Tuwaine coming over and handing Tom a glass of a very odd looking liquid.

"Oh no, what's in this?" Tom asked, a sharp grimace coating his face as he took the glass. He gave it a waft, gagging soon after with a look of downright disgust. "Mate, what the fuck is this? You guys trying to kill me or something?"

"It's everything you just ate blended together with a few secret ingredients," Tuwaine laughed.

"Bottoms up, babe," you giggled.

Tom looked at you with a deadpan expression as if to say, "Really?" You only shot him a bright smile, Tom sighing before his gaze landed back on the concoction.

"Can't believe I'm doing this," he muttered, hand coming up to pinch his nose before he threw his head back and took a big gulp. "It's actually not that bad when you get the smell out of the way," he hummed, smacking his lips as he eyed the drink in his hand.

"You are a weirdo," you laughed with a scrunch of your nose.

"I'm your weirdo," he retorted with a smug grin.

"Can we put a cheese counter in the corner of this video?" you joked.

Tom laughed with a shake of his head. "Well, that was very anti-climatic," he paused, showing the camera a peace sign and adding, "See you on the next one guys!"

Harry threw a thumbs-up to signal cut.

Tearing your gaze away from the camera, you turned to your boyfriend just in the nick of time. "Hey!" You snatched the drink away from Tom when he started to bring it up to his lips again. "What on earth are you doing?"

"It's not that bad, love," Tom chuckled.

"Yeah, until you complain about stomach aches and frequent visits to the toilet," you scoffed with a roll of your eyes. Standing up from your seat, you jabbed a finger at Tom. "Brush your teeth. No kisses for you until you do so." You raised a knowing brow at him before making your way to the kitchen to get rid of whatever this liquid is.

"Love you!" Tom called out lovingly, your voice echoing from the kitchen soon after.

"Love you too!"

"Ugh, so much cheese in this house it's starting to smell."

"Harry, you've never sounded more single."

"Fuck off, Tom."

-:-:-:-:-

like, reblog & leave a comment if you enjoyed & lemme know your thoughts! <3

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[the-darklings]

“ you’re my person. you’ll always be the one i go to. ” Jean + Clara/V 🥺

prompt: “you’re my person. you’ll always be the one i go to.”

pairing: jean x v (coa verse)

wc: 2.3k+ (aka I don't have an off button when it's them regardless of setting/verse)

notes: so while I'm obsessed with jeara in npfh verse, something about exploring them in coa where jean is almost a rogue figure in v's life and is near entirely removed from the overall dramas of her life is just so... (makes a vague, distressed sound). guess i'm just a sucker for "no matter what, life keeps drawing us back together" energy, also I just love their antagonistic, sexually charged banter : )

It’s the soft cocking of a gun behind you that alerts you to someone’s presence at your back.

It’s a split second, a whirlwind of gripping your own weapon, but it’s all too slow. Far too slow, John and Cassian and the Elder would have reprimanded you. Disappointing after years of work and training you’ve done. Sloppy at best, life-threatening at worst.

For priding yourself on speed as your greatest physical weapon, you simply react too slow. It’s not because your instincts are dull anymore — no, if anything, after the dessert you’re an even sharper version of yourself.

But there’s is a singular hole in your instinctive wall. One person who — unfailingly, and irritatingly — seems to slip behind every single one of your guards. More of a snake than you are. More deadly, more deceptively charming and coy.

"Well, well — look who the cat dragged in."

Jean’s voice is still silk. With the gentle roll of his accent, the ice in his eyes shifts and morphs — cracking at the sight of you; always, a match and a fuse — when you level your pistol on his face. Unflinching. A slight, indulgent twitch of his mouth greets your clinical action. He appears so infuriatingly unconcerned to have a fully loaded weapon trailed on him you have to bite back a snarl. Arrogant bastard.

But you’ve seen what his mouth is capable of. He would no doubt make an innuendo if you brought up the said mouth but he’s stopped entire gunfights with his wit and tongue alone in the past. Has stood beside you plenty of times, trying to weasel you both out of serious trouble.

You have a habit of running into each other every time the other needs backup the most. Neither of you would ever admit to needing one another but you’ve served each other’s self-interests plenty of times.

"What are you doing here?" you demand.

The Frenchman doesn’t move, dragging his stare over your body with curious, probing intensity. It’s near lazy, bordering on sexual perusal and instinctively your skin warms under the examination. Prick.

"Lovely to see you too, chérie,” he greets, his voice honey yet always just tantalisingly teasing the idea of more. He’s learned to present himself as the devil’s biggest temptation long ago; a temptation very few resist. His arm finally lowers with those words, followed by a click of safety coming back on but you’re not so quick to follow his lead. “You look positively alive," he adds, a touch sardonic.

Your lips twitch. "Sorry to disappoint."

Last time he saw a mess, not an assassin.

His broad frame is clad in a stitch-to-stitch perfect tailored suit. Dark and sleek. Not dark enough to be outright black but an odd, shimmering material that indeed reminds you of a devil in disguise. Prowling around and passing around favours and information but at a price — always a price, and never one you want to pay in the long run.

"Hm, yes,” he hums thoughtfully, a melody of rumbling deepness that is his voice settling in your gut as he draws closer. Strolling forward without a care in the world, as if you don’t have your pistol still raised. Still aimed at him. Your finger on the trigger. As if there isn’t a pinch to your features; a warning, venomous gleam in your eyes. “While you disappearing is no novelty. You disappearing for seven months to a point even I can't locate you certainly is."

With the sheer vastness of his web of information, you can only imagine how profoundly irritating he found it. Jean doesn’t like losing. Doesn’t like not being in control, in the know. Never has. Others dance to his tune. Losing is a language he doesn’t speak. If there is no way to get his way, he makes one. He cares little for the collateral damage left behind. His ruthlessness alone has always put you at odds though he’s always been quick to point out how hypocritical you are for your wry comments. How every enemy of yours has oftentimes been left spluttering on their own blood, robbed of life or a future.

You burn everything, chérie, he told you once, years ago now, to destroy so thoroughly is a curious talent for one so invested in life and greenery to have.

"I'm touched by the concern," you say eventually, your expression still sour and your mouth curved downwards.

Jean’s face creases at that, an eyebrow quirking, and lips stretching further back. That stupid little dimple in his left cheek appears again, and it’s a rare sight — one to always makes you wonder if this is genuine amusement or just another mask he wears.

"Actually I needed you to kill someone for me, vipère,” he rebukes, dismissive of your notations of sentimentality. A small sound whistles past his teeth, his eyes narrowing down on you when he halts in front of you, his chest bumping into the muzzle of the gun. The pearly white of his dress shirt cuts for a bleak contrast to your sleek, black pistol. “Your sneaky ways have proven to be... most useful."

His voice lowers, dripping towards a lulling, beguiling thing. He slants his head lower, near blending into the shadows of the room where you were searching for more information about your current mark just moments prior.

"Yeah, right," you huff, unimpressed.

"Does it surprise you?” he wonders curiously, his cologne tickling your nose when he slants even closer, still towering over you. And you know his cologne — so damn well, you know it in your marrow — know how it smells when it’s faded and muted. When you nudge your nose against the juncture of his throat, burying yourself in him. Greedy or not, you always stole his warmth. And for some reason he always permitted it. Perhaps he found some begrudging amusement in moments of lingering contact and intimacy between you. For a man who might as well be carved from ice, he knows exactly how to make you burn. “The idea that I think you're my person? A trustworthy contact? You'll always be the one I go to."

Your arm lowers at long last, making you peer up at him from under your lashes. Consider him. Jean’s mouth rests slightly agape, his breaths slowing, slowing, slowing — matching yours, you realise suddenly, ignoring the pinprick of desire at the base of your neck. His proximity chips at your guard and you lean closer too. Alone in this dark room, alone in this world, two solitary figures occasionally passing by each other. In these rare instances of proximity, it’s easy to forget your loneliness. Easy to pretend you’re one and the same.

Your fingers slither up his chest and towards his neck. To kiss him you would have to stretch your limbs and muscles. This you know intimately. If only because you know exactly how his body fits against yours. And what an odd thought it is — to know that where there is fear and unease with others, there’s only need to be closer with him. Every cell in your body seems to hum at the mental image; eager to agree, eager to indulge. The idea of sampling more of him, tangling yourself further in the spider’s web is too tempting. Too enticing. Jean inclines into you. Your escape, hideaway, so dissimilar to how the dessert felt. Like a gilded cage. A makebelieve. With him though it feels…

Your breaths mingle, intertwining, neither of you breaking the eye contact first. He doesn’t allow you a single inhale without devouring every micro quiver of your lips.

"Nice try,” you exhale knowingly before your mouths can touch, leaning back with a saccharine grin. Your fingertips tease over the heated skin of his neck despite the broken spell. It thrills you, the tension of strong tendons you feel there, pulled tauter by your prodding. “Now why are you really here?"

For a single instance, you think Jean will continue his pretence, his unending fictitious act. Mock you further with yet another agreeable mask he shows everyone else. But a flicker, and then his charm melts into something more cunning, crueller, yet somehow — impossibly — even hungrier and darker than before. He’s still too close, too physically there; next to you, in you, like a splinter you can’t get out. Or want to.

Unravelling of a facade packaged in a span of a second, a heartbeat.

"I need him alive, V."

His voice drips from honey to dark velvet. Teasing, seductive promise. Jean’s fingers drag against the curve of your jaw as he speaks, his touch inveigling but you’ve danced this dance before. He should know better than to expect easy prey by now.

"And I need him dead,” you snip back, cupping his cheek in return, scraping your fingers against the dark stubble against his jaw with an innocent tilt of your head. Sometimes you hate it — the way he’s able to rip out something darker in you, more chillingly untamed. Jean is a paradox, a tempest blowing against the ruleset. So often being beside him makes you recklessly want to do the same. “So if you're after something, I suggest you work quicker, Jean."

There’s a split second in which you think he might flip on you the way he’s done on so many others. A warm, inviting smile — all charisma and magnetism, toothy and wide — seconds before he plants a bullet in your body. You’ve seen him do it so many times in the past your head spins. In part from wondering if he will give you one last kiss before he pulls the trigger, or if he really believes you will not take him down with you if he attempts it.

"If I get the information I need by sunrise, have dinner with me tomorrow."

His thumb nudges against the curve of your bottom lip. Rough yet gentle, sensuous yet treacherous. He’s so used to getting his way you want to refuse him out of principle alone if nothing else. It’s rather enjoyable — in a dark, cruel way — to deny him, to see how many masks he can flip through until only his own face remains. You've yet to see such a day.

"There's a distinct lack of a question mark in that statement," you note coolly.

The tension between you sits like a physical weight. Overbearing and thick; you glimpse all the things he’s doing to you inside his mind already. His fingers digging into your hips, hoisting you into his strong arms. A hiss of searing breath against your ear, teeth against your neck, animalistic, skin against skin. Sweat and filth and passion. You’ve healed during your stay at the dessert. He can see it in you. A part of you has transformed, shed your old, torn skin — he’s certainly coaxed and encouraged this change in you prior. It had become a particular interest of his once John departed.

Bury your past, vipère, it doesn’t serve you anymore.

Glaciers of his gaze thaw and spark into a sapphire flame the longer you gaze at one another, hungry and wanting. Jean’s angular, virile features tighten with restraint but he doesn’t crack, a faint grin still lingering in place.

"I'm not going to grovel at your feet, vipère,” he says, his words ringing deeper and sultry, near gravelly. A knife’s edge, really, razor-sharp against your fragile pulse. His fingers trace the contours of your parted mouth, and you sense his breath when he nudges close. The scent of tobacco and red wine still lingers on his own lips muddying your honed senses. “It's not in my nature to do so. If I want something, I go for it."

And for some reason it’s him — him you lean into, him you don’t shun or snarl at when he touches you. So intimately. Painting you with his hands anew — bloody hands of a murderous man, a liar and a cheat.

Your lashes flutter. "And here I thought you liked games."

"Only the ones I win,” he breathes hotly, his teeth gleaming, a wolf’s jaws open for devouring. His large palm slips to cup your face, bracing against your cheek, steadying you. Your mouths are almost touching, almost kissing, almost biting. “And you... are... most certainly a game I'm happy to play every time, ma vipère.”

The last part — wanton and just a touch possessive, throaty with a heavier accent — scrapes against the shell of your ear. Hot, wet exhales of oxygen skitter against the curve of your neck and it leaves you shuddering against him. Jean grins into your skin at the small victory, his mouth flitting over your beating pulse in reward. Once, twice. He’s not touching you further, and you grind your jaw to prevent yourself from touching him in return.

Always the game of who will give in first.

When he realises you’re not about to hand him his victory as he no doubt hoped you would, he pulls back, a flash of teeth visible in the darkness. Lights from the street outside illuminate his handsome features when he moves back. His eyes drink in your form, from head to toe, his thumb swiping over his own mouth slowly. It coils your stomach when you realise it’s the same hand he touched your mouth with.

An indirect kiss to taste you. Despite your controlled expression, you feel that distant kiss as if he were smearing your mouth with his until your edges blurred with his.

“Dinner will be at 8 pm sharp. Don't be late,” he instructs, low and smooth, his voice still scratchy with hunger. He pivots to go but pauses midturn, glancing at you over his shoulder while his hand slips into his slacks. “Oh, and do wear red. You always look so fetching in that colour. And it looks ever-so pretty on my bedroom floor."

[julemmaes]

Thoughts on Thomas and Alastair reading red white and Royal blue together in modern AU.

uhm yES PLEASE

This contains spoilers for Red, White and Royal Blue. Enjoy!

Imagine them in bed right after dinner cause they're one of those couples who ditch their friends to read

Thomas coming back home with this book Matthew and Cordelia have been ranting about for the past weeks

And Alastair is weirded out by the fact that he has two copies, "Why would you buy two?"

Thomas just shrugs, "I didn't. Cordelia gave me hers, cause she told me you'd spoil anything the second you read it."

They settle in bed and Alastair waits until Thomas is ten pages in to start his, cause Cordelia wasn't wrong about him spoiling everything

Thomas is a calm reader, only crying when you're supposed to cry and reading a book without having to talk about it for the rest of your life

Alastair is the complete opposite

He frowns and screams at the books and always goes to Thomas to make him read single sentences before starting to rant about what fucked up shit the characters are doing

Thomas usually doesn't understand anything of what he says, but he also stops doing whatever he's doing, focusing all his attention on Alastair until he just storms out of the room to continue reading the book

Alastair is also a ugly crier when it comes to books

And a thrower

He once hit Thomas by mistake and it was because of a character's death. Imagine his guilt just adding to his grief and picture a very distraught Alastair while he's being coddled by his boyfriend

Alastair has laughed and chuckled way too many times in Thomas' opinion, but hasn't commented on anything yet

Until, "Oh my sweet jesus, bOY YOUR GAY IS SHOWING."

Thomas has to laugh at that and turns towards him, "What happened?"

Alastair is shaking his head in disbelief, "Alex is hating Henry with every fiber of his body one page and then he's brushing his posters the next? He's dumb."

"He reminds me of someone." he mutters

Alastair ignores him

"I'm living for Henry calling Alex out on his shit behaviour." Alastair whispers at some point, with a large smile on his face

Something hits Thomas on the leg and when he looks up he notices Alastair with his eyes and mouth wide, "The cAKE!"

"Homoerotic frat bro mishap - gotta love this woman."

"Tom," he calls him, "have you ever hate-read my wikipedia page?"

"You don't have a wik-"

"But, honestly, who does he think he's fooling? This boy is dumb dumb." He laughs, "Mad stupid."

From time to time Thomas just hears "Stan Zahra." or "Stan Ellen." and he just smiles

At some point Alastair just screams-laughs and goes "I'm going to thROW UP ON YOU, I'M DYING." before falling silent again without any trace of amusement seconds later

Thomas is startled when Alastair screech, "BABYY!"

"What?"

"ALEX IS SAYING HENRY'S SKIN IS SOFT."

Thomas is enjoying the book just as much, but he can't wait for the moment when they both realise they like each other, so he just keeps reading

"Alex was fAST starting to see Henry as a human being and not some kind of monster."

"Oh my god, why is Alex being such a dickhead-"

After a few minutes of silence, Alastair gasps, bringing his book higher and buring his face between the pages before screeching again.

"WHAT'S GOING OOON?"

Thomas snorts with wide eyes

"HE'S CHECKING FOR HENRY'S TEXTS!!!"

After a while, Alastair turns to Thomas, brushing his arm, "Are you liking it?"

He nods, "I like the fact that Henry uses capitals at the beginning of his texts while Alex doesn't, it's the little things."

During The Turkey Scene™️ Alastair just loses it and Thomas has to stop reading to calm him down

"Oh god Tom fucking finally-" he turns to Thomas, "Henry looks fucking rested for once."

Thomas nods again, "And Alex noticed."

That makes a wide grin spread over Alastair's face

Thomas understands he's reached the New Year's Eve when all he can hear from Alastair are gasps and curses

"NO. NONONO. NOO!" Alastair hits Thomas on the arm, "Alex just kissed Nora and Henry ran away."

Thomas smirks, "Just keep reading."

"THEY'RE KISSING. GOD YES. THEY'RE KISSING."

"NOOOOO!" Alastairs screams, "WHY DID HE LEAVE WTF?!?!"

"Thomas I'm breaking up with you if you don't tell me now this is gonna be fixed somehow in the next three pages."

Thomas just clicks his tongue, shaking his head

"Wha-" Alastair just huffs a laugh. He turns to Thomas, pointing to the book, "Baby have you read this? Alex is- He thinks he's what now?" He's straight up laughing now, "Straight?!"

"He did what with Liam?"

"This is literally the gayest shit I've ever read in my life."

"Nah ha, I don't believe it."

"How can he think he's straight?"

"Oh god they watched porn together- HE JERKED HIM OFF."

Alastair just hits his head against the headboard, "I didn't think I'd have to go through the who the fuck am I in this book. I THOUGHT IT WAS PRETTY CLEAR JUST BY THE FACT THAT HE FUCKING CARESSED HENRY'S POSTERS."

"AND THEN THIS NEVERENDING LIST OF GAY THINGS."

Alastair panicked for a short time when Henry was seen with that blonde but started screeching again after a moment

Thomas bursts into laughter when he heard Alastair mutters God save the Queen

"'I want you on the bed.' OH JESUS CHRIST THOMAS IT'S US."

"Tom?"

Thomas turns when he hears the hesitancy in his boyfriend's voice. Alastair's face is red and he's biting his lower lip

"You okay? What part are you reading?"

"No, uhm," Alastair scratches his head, "can we -" he clears his voice, "Can we make out?"

Thomas blinks a couple of times, "Sure."

A heavy make out session ensues before they both can start reading again

"We need to buy cupcakes tomorrow." Alastair mutters at some point, chewing on his lip

"Thomas this fucking book is the best thing I've ever read. I'm loving it so much."

Alastair closes the book around midnight, but Thomas knows he's not finished. He doesn't look his way thinking he's just gonna go to the bathroom

When Thomas senses him move around on the sheets and lay his head on hip lap, he closes the book too and look down at his boyfriend

"What's going on? We just made out."

Alastair grunts in his legs and looks up at him, "You're my match."

Thomas doesn't understand, but he smiles and leans down to kiss him

He resumes reading and realises Alastair had read more than him when he reaches Alex's and Ellen's conversation about matches. Thomas looks at Alastair once again and pesters him with kisses

It's around 3am when Alastair starts yawning

"Alas, you should go to bed."

He shakes his head, "No, I'm not tired, I wanna finish the book."

"The book will be here tomorrow."

"I don't care."

He drops the fight, knowing perfectly fine that he'll never win this

Alastair can be quite impressive when he finds something he likes - especially when it's books

"Fucking homophobes."

"I'm gonna riot if somebody doesn't let Alex call Henry right the fuck now."

"HENRY ASKED ALEX IF HE IS OKAY? BABY WE'RE WORRIED ABOUT YOU."

The end of the book is read so fast that Thomas can't keep up with him and is now more than 20 pages back

Alastair is a crying and screaming mess by the end of it and Thomas has never seen him so upset in their time together

He's just spoiled the whole book for him, but he doesn't care. He doesn't care that it's now 5am and they have work in a couple of hours, cause Alastair just looks his way with wide eyes and his mouth open as if he's just realized something shocking

"Oh my god, did Pez, June and Nora had a threesome in that hotel room?"

tsc tag list (if you wanna be added or removed just send me an ask or dm me)

bold tags don’t work

@storysaremyreality @clara-sm @zoyalinas-nazyalensky @harryscameron @jamescordelias @grxceblqckthxrn @stitchkiss @ahiretsinging @allofmywonders @tremendousheadachecollector @tlh-tea @taco-taco-belle @city-of-fae @ifeelfreewithoutmyshoes @fclklcres @ghostlivvy @matthewwfairchildd  @abigneignenn @imherongraystairstrash @rednailpolishqueen @herondamnn @parababitch-herondale @silent-nerd @fairherondale @starryherondales @ireallyshouldsleeprn @sleeping-and-books @claralady @anne-reads @darkshadowqueensrule

[tsukkisbean]

haikyuu nsfw alphabet series | tendō satori

please block #claras steamys if you don’t want to see this type of content!!

warnings: sexual themes, mentions of (unprotected) sex, voyuerism, bondage, edging,  fem!reader

a/n:  based on post time skip!! okay i don’t talk a lot about tendō so it was super fun to analyze him and bring my headcanons to life bc he’s definitely a hard hard dom!! this is also unedited pls excuse any unfinished sentences or mistakes

return to nsfw alphabet series masterlist

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

i think tendō would be surprisingly big on aftercare. given how he acts in the bedroom (detailed later) he makes sure that you are well taken care of after a long session together. like he’ll grab some water and a towel and help you get cleaned up and comfortable. maybe in the morning he’ll have a super simple breakfast ready like a toast and coffee or tea or maybe even some chocolate depending on the time of day

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

his favourite body part of his is 100000% his fingers. his hands are large, fingers long and skinny and he absolutely loves the way they look shoved down into your pretty mouth, around your throat, or fingering your wet cunt.

he absolutely loves your mouth (detailed more below!!)

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

so based on the above tendō loves when you’re sitting on your knees, waiting for him to cum in your mouth. there’s just something about the way you look with his cum painted all over your tongue. and it drives him especially crazy when you lick your lips to clean up the drops that are spilling down the corner of your mouth because you don’t want to waste a single drop

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

honestly? i don’t think he has any, mainly because he’s not afraid to be open with you. he strikes me as the type with absolutely no filter and so he’s going to tell you everything and anything on his mind whether it’s a random dirty thought or something new that he wants to try with you

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

i’m a little on the fence about this mainly because tendō has a personality that people need time to get used to and understand. so that being said, i don’t think he has a lot of experience, BUT he knows what he’s doing (from watching a lot of porn probably)

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

you’re on your back, legs spread out wide, his hands wrapped around your ankles, holding your legs in the air while he fucks you

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

not goofy, but i wanna say he’s more playful. he likes to talk dirty, and say things he knows will make you embarrassed. loves the expression when you’re lost for words but also clearly turned on!!

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

not groomed whatsoever like i cannot see him giving a crap about what he looks like down there

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

honestly i think he gets so into the whole sex aspect that he completely forgets about being romantic for the most part. he’ll do things like praise you, and maybe a kiss or two here or there but most of it will just be him focusing on fucking you and help you reach your high

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

he knows that you know and you know that he knows, yet you don’t move from your spot hiding spot. you didn’t intend for this to happen; all you wanted was to surprise tendō by finally coming home early for once. you peer through the crack in the door, reveling at the way your boyfriend looked with his eyes shut, head thrown back, and those beautiful fingers wrapped around the base of his cock. it feels weird to be spying on your boyfriend, someone you were regularly intimate with, yet you can’t seem to tear your eyes away.  you don’t realize, but your mouth hangs open, drool dribbling down your chin.

the hairs on the back of your neck stand on end as your boyfriend’s voice cuts through the silence in the air, “are you going to just sit there like a dirty slut and me jack off or are you going to come suck my dick?”

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

tendō enjoyed seeing the look of defeat on his opponents faces when he played volleyball and i think that translates into the bedroom. he’s the type that loves to see his partner struggle (i would say he’s pretty much a sadist) and so i can think of A LOT of things he’d be into but i’m going to just keep it to top 3. 

1. bondage: loves to tie you up, your hands completely bound, eyes covered with a blindfold so you can’t move in any way. the power he feels just seeing you struggle, the way your face contorts in frustration because your arms are bound and your vision is temporarily taken away is immense

2. exhibitionism: absolutely LOVES the thrill of the two you possibly getting caught will having sex; the expression of the unsuspecting person.he gets especially excited at the way you clench around him because you’re nervous someone will spot you even though you’re okay with the exhibitionism

3. edging: favourite way to do this is first by eating you out. as soon as he feels your thighs about to quiver, he’ll pull away. next, he’ll pump his fingers in and out of your drenched cunt, fingers curling every so often. when he he feels you clench around his fingers, he’ll stop again. to top it off, he’ll fuck into you, slamming his hips against yours but at a painstakingly slow pace. loves the way you beg and cry for him to let you cum.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

the balcony of your apartment!! checks off all his boxes. it’s accessible and there’s the possibility of getting caught

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

dirty talk!!! if you want to get him all riled, tell him all the things you want him to do. better yet, tell him all the things you want to do him and you guys will be in the bedroom in no time

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

i can’t think of a single thing. i think tendō is one of the most open to experimenting when it comes to sex and he won’t really know he doesn’t like it until he actually tries it

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

this might come as a surprise to some, but i think he prefers to oral. the man is skilled with his tongue. he loves the way you squirm in his grasp, needy for more, but refuses to give it to you just because it’s fun to him

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

fast and rough; he likes to build up the momentum and right when you’re about to cum he’ll stop. continues that pattern until you’re reduced to a blabbering mess

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

not a fan because he prefers to draw out each time with you as long as he can. will only do it if he’s super desperate and he knows you guys can’t wait for the right moment

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

this man is down to do everything and anything that you want. he probably has a long list of things he wants to try with you and it grow every single day.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

can accomplish anything he puts his mind to so i would say his stamina is pretty high. he could probably go for at least 3 rounds, each lasting around 30-45 minutes (including foreplay)

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

lots of different toys for the both of you to use on each other!!

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

given his kinks tendō is the biggest tease but he’s not cruel; over time he’s learned your limits and will push you just until you’re a quivering, crying mess  because he knows you can take it

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

not super loud, but he’s extremely vocal in the sense that he likes whispering dirty things and praises in your ear (with the occasional grunt or moan in-between) cause he knows it makes your skin crawl.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

at a time when the entire city should be asleep, there you stand on the balcony of your shared apartment with your boyfriend. one hand grasps the railing in front of you, the other presses firmly against your mouth. the feeling of your boyfriend’s lips merely ghosting against the nape of your neck is enough to send electric currents up your spine, “kitten, why are you so shy today?” 

in one swift movement, both your arms are pinned against your back, your chest meeting the frosty glass of the balcony. his thrusts are long and deep, and with each one it becomes harder and harder to hold back your pathetic cries.

at a time when the entire city should be asleep, there you stand with your boyfriend for anyone to watch as they please.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

longer than average, average girth and a slight curve to the right

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

h i g h. mainly cause he randomly thinks of something new that he wants to try with you and can’t calm down until it happens

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

honestly he probably falls asleep while cuddling you almost instantly after you guys are done

[captain-barnes-writes]

Someone Like You [5/6]

Summary: In which Sebastian tries to win you back a year and a half after your relationship’s rupture, but only because there’s a new man in your life. [Part 5]

(Mini-series)

Pairing: Sebastian Stan x Latina

Warning: Angst (LOTS) , language, 18+. 

NOT PROOFREAD so watch out for lots of errors.

Word count: 4.5k

You’d avoided thinking of Sebastian for a good portion of the morning, but he was creeping back into your head forbidding you from forgetting what had happened just last night. Upon arriving at your hotel room the night before, you had turned into a weeping mess while still clad in your beautiful satin dress, a huge contrast to the ugly emotions that were seeping out of you. Sobs had wracked through your body to the point it had become hard to breathe.

The strong smell of him lingered on your body as if taunting you that he still owned every part of your being. Despite everything, despite the many months apart and despite the very reason why things had not worked out he still had an effect on you. Even after you’d jumped into the shower to wash the night away, especially to rid of his scent and the smell of sex that had followed you, you could still feel his lingering hands on you, the wet trail his lips would leave on your skin. As if taunting you, his scent was still present even in your room. You couldn’t escape him.

He still managed to pull at your every heartstring. It was the silky locks, the azure eyes with the crinkles on each end and that toothy grin of his. It was the way a single glance your way and you were a puddle at his feet, melting for him. But whatever happened last night had been a mistake, he was a part of your past and had to stay there. Yet you still found yourself pondering over how after so much time he could hold such a part of you, tight and permanent. The fluttering sensation in your belly, and pressure on your chest weighing heavy and electric that he induced with just one glance let you know that he was still very much a part of you. And when he looked at you, kissed you, let alone put his hands anywhere on you? It was a magnetic force so strong it left you breathless.

With a heavy chest and an even heavier heart, you thought of how you’d become pathetic and submissive all over again with just a mere touch of his. So puddy in his hands, holding onto every word that fell from his lips. His hands had been so greedy, wanting to hold you and kiss you all at once. He’d been everywhere, placed his large hands on every single part of your body. And you couldn’t lie to yourself, couldn’t deny the deep attraction that was clearly still present.

The magnetic pull, the sexual tension and desperation that had surrounded both your glistening bodies the night before was an engraved image in your head; pinned to your mind not letting you forget how he’d felt inside you. How he took you with such force, kissed you as if your lips were his only mean of survival.  It was memorable what you’d both shared. Raw and emotional and in its wake left a gaping hole in your heart.

Despite how good it had felt while it happened, once it ended everything felt as if it had come crashing down. Like shattering glass around you, falling, breaking and so very loud, your mind had woken you from the bliss that had been shared in that stuffy closet. Like an alarm that rang and rang and the only way of shutting it off was the very act of leaving. Again. And so you did, you ran off once again from the man who’d held your heart almost two years ago and had refused to care for it. Refused to hold only you and you alone. He’d been valiant enough to corner you and take you again with such confidence, then you were valiant enough of walking away too.

But this time it felt different. Horribly different because there was pain growing inside, building up and tormenting you. You had been unfaithful. It didn’t matter that the relationship with Romeo was not yet serious or that he was away in a different country at the moment, none of that mattered because your desire for Sebastian shouldn’t have clouded what reality was in the first place. Nothing should have made you forget your morals and had you commit such a sinful act. It felt as if the guilt was diminishing you if you didn’t come clean or at least put pause on the budding relationship.

As if he had an extra sense, your phone rang next to you breaking you from the torturous thoughts that had been clawing at you. Romeo’s name appeared on the screen, his contact picture blank. Swallowing loudly with tears already brimming your eyes, you took a hold of your phone with shaky hands. God, what the hell were you going to say?

“Hi.” Was all you managed to choke out when you finally answered. Voice low and dull, nothing compared to the usual silkiness and cheerfulness that laced it.

“What is going on, Y/N?” Romeo’s boomed through the phone. The background noise was distracting, loud chattering in Spanish could be heard.

“What?” You felt slightly shaken at the tone of his voice, he didn’t sound like the sweet Romeo you’d grown used to hearing. He sounded different and, dare say, impolite without even a simple greeting to start the conversation off.

“I’m not a fool, Y/N. What the fuck happened yesterday? What are all these pictures of you and that damn actor from those Marvel movies?” He paused, the sound of heavy footsteps could be heard and the background noise was slowly disappearing. “They’re circulating everywhere to the point that people keep tagging me on that shit.”

You shouldn’t have, but a wave of relief washed through you. He was referring to Chris and at the mention of him you wanted to laugh. Even he thought the same as the media and besides the relief, you also felt upset.

“Oh, that...I got really anxious during the red carpet and he was nice enough to help me out. Walked me inside the venue and all. After the awards, we were just chatting.”

“You’re making me look like a fool. My whole team thinks so too.” It was apparent that he was only concerned about his image and the way people perceived him. It was disappointing to hear the roughness of his voice, accusatory and unkind. Though deep inside you were telling yourself that you deserved this type of treatment. You deserved it because even though he was upset about something that had not even happened, there was still something to be upset about. He just didn’t know what.

“I can’t befriend people because it makes you look bad? That makes no sense.” The words had flown past your lips before you could even think. You wanted to take the accusations, forgive them because you’d done something awful, but you weren’t that type of person anymore. You didn’t let men walk all over you.

“That looked more than friendly to me.”

“Yes, to you. My line of job has me meeting people constantly, as does yours, so either you get used to it or you don’t.” You had no filter. The words were just coming out without much thought. You wanted to be calm and let him continue accusing you using the harsh edge in his voice because you deserved it. You felt like he had every right to treat you this way, to denounce your behavior because he was right it had been more than friendly. It had become more than friendly just not with Chris, but with a different man he didn’t even know about.

“¿Qué estás diciendo? Se clara conmigo.” What are you saying? Be clear with me.

“You heard me. I’m not going to sit here and let you accuse me of anything. ” You responded, voice somewhat shaky. You were pleading with yourself to let you be firm and to keep an even voice, but your eyes were already welling up with tears for the second time in less than a day.

“Don’t embarrass me anymore,  that’s all I’m asking.” He couldn’t be serious, you thought. The world didn’t revolve around him.

“Vete a la verga.” Go to hell.

And you hung up the phone. You didn’t know what had come over you. You wanted so badly to take the treatment and the accusations because you were worthy of them. Despite Romeo’s true colors that were coming to light, you had still done him wrong. You’d slept with another man and now you had probably just ended a relationship not even over that, but because of another man whom you had nothing to do with. You were an awful person.

Although you were an emotional mess and felt like one too your mind drifted to what Romeo had said about being tagged in certain pictures. You became curious and despite the state of being you were in, curiosity always overrode anything.

Grabbing your phone again you did the one thing you were advised to never do, google yourself. Upon typing your name in the search bar and hitting the search button, instead of it being about you it was about none other than Chris Evans. High quality pictures had surfaced the web the moment your anxiety fiasco happened last evening and it had become an even bigger deal today.

Y/N flirts with Chris Evans.

Romeo who? Y/N cuddles up to Chris Evans.

You pressed your face back into the pillow and groaned loudly. The sound echoed in the empty room as the city of Angels boomed below you. You were upset that even the sweet interaction such as yours and Chris could be taken so out of context. The man was no doubt an Adonis, you weren’t blind and you’d be a liar if you said your heart hadn’t beat faster at the sight of him yesterday. But it had all been so innocent and his gentlemanly actions had been genuine and with no underlying intentions. It was nothing but friendly.  He’d been gallant, extending his arm so you could hook yours through it to get you out of the dramatic disaster that had been your red carpet experience. That was it. People were insatiable with their yearning for new information on people’s personal lives, wanting every little detail.

You’d taken pictures with other people at the after party and those pictures were out there too, but the media had clawed at those images that included Chris and ran with them. Of course, he was single and any woman who crossed his path was apparently dating him. You hated that now you were rumored to be one of them.

You were now a fuse of different emotions. Sadness because your relationship had just ended through a phone call, guilt because you’d been unfaithful and a flare of anger because you couldn’t believe your interaction with Chris had been taken as otherwise.

You saved one of the images to your camera roll. You were upset because many things in your life had come tumbling down in a matter of hours, but you knew that only you could discredit rumors that had no foundation. You didn’t want to become a victim of the media and knew just how to fix this.

Just letting y’all know that @ChrisEvans noticed me become extremely anxious in the middle of the red carpet & was kind enough to walk me the rest of the way. That is all. Please don’t believe these dating rumors, men and women CAN be friends🙄

You typed on twitter and attached a picture of him being the perfect gentleman, your arm hooked to his, bearded face smiling while he led you down the carpet. The real fixture of the picture was the clearly agitated face expression you wore. Lips formed into a nervous smile, anxious with knitted brows, forehead creased.

Pleased with the words and image, you pressed send to your tweet and dropped your phone back onto the bed. It bounced on the very edge of the very edge of the bed, any sudden movements and it would fall to the floor but you didn’t care.

Your cheeks were still wet with tears. Eyes dull, saddened and you felt exhausted. Chest so heavy it felt as if a weight was on top of it. Crawling under the covers you decided that the only way to forget about everything at least for a few hours was to doze off into a deep sleep.

-------

When you arrived back in New York a few days later after having concluded with a packed schedule, the weather had significantly dropped. You noticed the way the trees were still continuing to change in colors and drop their foliage on the wet floor. The holiday season was commencing and the vibrant colors of lights and many christmas decorations were already up throughout the city. It was such a divine sight and provided a serene feeling throughout your body. It felt like such a contrast from the way life had been playing out for you the last few days. Everything had changed in such a short time.

Your apartment was exactly as you’d left it and because the temperature had dropped even being in the comfort of it you felt as if you were freezing so you’d turned on the heater. You’d spent the last few hours trying to forget what the reality of your personal life was by taking the christmas decorations from storage and beginning the process of decorating that you loved so much. The holiday season was one of your favorites and despite the emotional state you were in, bits of happiness had oozed into your aura.

Frank Sinatra’s Fly Me to the Moon was rudely interrupted by the ringing of the doorbell. You hadn’t contacted anybody in the last few days so nobody knew you were back in New York so you felt a little puzzled as to who it could be. You looked down at yourself in a haste noting that you were decent enough with your cozy oversized clothing. With a huff, you opened the door.

“Sebastian.” You sputtered out at the sight of the disheveled man. Like you, he was clad in comfortable clothing. Black sweats and a large jacket. With a shocked expression you noted how he looked so tired with dark undereye circles and he looked awfully cold standing in the hallway of your apartment complex.

“Hey.” Was all he said. His hands in his pockets.

“What are you doing here?”

He remained quiet for a few seconds, his teeth biting the plushiness of his bottom lip. Sebastian was just standing there looking at you as if you were the one standing in his apartment. As if you’d been the one to show up to his place unannounced.

“I know you probably don’t want to see me, Y/N. But I really have to talk to you. Can I please come inside?” His azure eyes were almost pleading, gazing at you. Even in the situation you found yourself in you couldn’t help but take notice of how blue his eyes were in the light, gleaming and so pretty. It was inappropriate to even be thinking of him this way when he’d just asked you a question and you seemed to be stalling.

“Uh. I don’t know, Sebastian.” You were unsure if to let him in. You’d been so weak for him at a venue filled with hundreds of people that you didn’t trust yourself to be alone with him in your apartment.

“I just really have to talk to you. Please.” He was begging and looked so desperate for you to say yes. He looked so cold just standing there in the freezing hallway that his lips seemed chapped too. You were pitying him despite everything and thought how this was the exact reason why sometimes you were taken advantage of. You were too kind.

Regardless of how much internal battle was taking place within you, you nodded and pushed the door ajar to let him in. He walked into your living room, taking a seat on the love seat opposite you when you did too.  The atmosphere felt a little awkward.

“I can’t stop thinking about that night, Y/N. I know I shouldn’t have initiated it, but it felt so right at the time. And even now, it still feels right.” Sebastian started.

“That night wasn’t supposed to happen, Sebastian. I did something awful to someone I was in a relationship with by being unfaithful. And guess what?” You paused, slightly chucking at yourself and the way life seemed to be playing with you. “Not even a day after I cheated and we broke up. Not even because of us, by the way, but because of something completely unrelated. And now here you are in my living room almost a week after we had sex and I’m...lost.”

Sebastian’s gaze was glued on you, he looked desperate. But you didn’t know what he was desperate for. You were confused as to why he was in your apartment in the first place.

“I’m sorry about your relationship.”

“No you’re not.” Was your response. He wasn’t sorry at all, why would he be?

“My relationship just recently ended too. But this was a little bit before the awards show.” God, what did he want from you. You wanted to know why he was at your apartment but he was beating around the bush.

“Oh. Well, I’m sorry about that.” You unconsciously took your lip in between your teeth while looking down at your clasped hands. Your apartment was warmer now with the heater having been on for a few hours and you made a mental note to turn it off soon.

“I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you. And this has been going on for a long time, Y/N. It’s not a recent thing. I think what triggered it even more was when I saw those music videos of you and...Well I felt extremely jealous. And I felt so angry with myself at having let you go and not treated you the way you deserved.” Sebastian stopped himself as he broke his gaze from you to look down at his hands. “And God, he just couldn’t even keep his hands off you...fuck, it was like you were a piece of meat to him and you just let him touch you like that.” His blue eyes were wide, mouth slightly ajar while he ran his hands through his hair in frustration. He had no right to be telling you off like this, especially not when you were witness to his many escapades with other women after you called it quits with him. No matter how hard you tried to avoid any news on him, it always came up somehow. It had been a nightmare.

“Who do you think you are, Sebastian?” You retorted, loud enough to alert him but not loud enough for your neighbors to hear. You didn’t let him answer as you continued spewing your rage. “So what’s it to you now? It seems like you suddenly want me again only because you saw me with another man. Was it because it wasn’t you?” You spat, doe eyes furious. Even with the gushing hot anger pulsing through you, this whole scenario was somewhat satisfying to you. After so long, he was the one in a jealous fit.

“Because that should be me. I feel like it’ll always be me.” His face had perked up at your questions, face still red with anger but slightly softening his hardened expression. He’d gotten to his feet, rounded the coffee table and started walking to you in a slow manner, careful not to push you away. You were on your feet then too, watching his movements and not at all knowing what to expect next from him.

“I don’t belong to you, Sebastian.” He hated the way his name seethed out of your mouth because you used to call him adoring names or whenever his name flew past your lips it wasn’t out of anger.

“Did you think I was going to sit around and wait for you? You refused to commit to me. I mean we weren’t even in a relationship according to you. You didn’t have time for one, didn’t have the type of commitment it took to be in one. Even the thought of being in that type of situation again makes me sick now.” Your voice was wavering, but your newfound confidence had not. He was going to hear what you had to say and he was going to hear it loud and clear. “You never did much for me. We were always holed up in my apartment because it seemed as if you didn’t want to be seen with me.”

“No, that was not it at all. Don’t think I was ashamed of you because that’s not it.” Sebastian was grabbing at his hair again, and this time he was pacing your living room back and forth. He couldn’t believe you thought he’d been ashamed of you.

“I was stupid. I was a fucking idiot who didn’t appreciate you and had commitment issues. That’s it, but I was never ashamed of you. I don’t want you to think that.” He exclaimed, eyes meeting your teary ones. He didn’t want to make you cry, and the sight of your pretty face with fresh tears falling down your cheeks was eating him alive.

“What the fuck do you want from me?” You cried out, hands wailing in the air in exasperation.

“To be with you.” Sebastian choked out. He was coming to terms with his feelings again, he’d pushed them aside for too long.

“Fuck, that’s all I want baby. To be with you. A chance to make it right by you and treat you the way I should have done before. I’m sorry for not appreciating you before and for taking you for granted. I’m sorry for being a blind asshole. I’m sorry for everything. You deserve the whole world and I’m willing to do anything to give you just that.” He was walking closer to you, hands stretched in front of him to grab hold of your arms. Your heart was beating erratically and eyes searched your living room, looking everywhere but him.

“Look me at me, doll.” He whispered as he stood in front of you now. He was so close. Too close that you could feel his breath fanning down at your face. He was taller than you and your eyes peered up at him through long dark lashes .

“I can’t, Seb…” Your voice was wavering, the confidence it oozed earlier was diminishing. You were internally screaming at the fact that he still had an effect on you. A heavy deep seated effect that pulled waves of electricity through you as his hand traveled up to caress your tense jaw.

“Fuck, yes you can. We can. Don’t you feel this?” He was inching ever closer if it was possible. His body plush against yours.

“No. ” You said, eyes breaking contact with his and hands pushing at his chest to move him away. He slightly stumbled backwards, not expecting the harsh refusal from your part.

“And you need to leave right now.” You pointed at the door. His shoulders had dropped at the sound of your words and he felt so dejected at your refusal to be with him now. He knew exactly how he had made you feel now because he felt devastated. Chest tight and his breathing uneven. You were tearing him apart.

“Is that really what you want?” His voice was low, eyes downcast as his hand slipped from your arm.

“Yes.” You whispered, your eyes looking forward trying so hard to focus on the tan lamp at the far end of the room. Even though it tore him apart, he walked his way back to the front door. He turned again just to take a quick glance at you as if expecting you to change your mind. When you didn’t even budge, didn’t even offer a single look at him, his demeanor faltered and he sauntered past the door managing to shut it behind him.

A sudden pang of excessive emotion allocated itself in your chest. So heavy it almost had you gasping. Cheeks wet with fresh tears and lips quivering, you were in such disarray not even a minute after he’d walked out the door. Even after so long, this is what you’d wanted. Him finally confessing how he felt about you, showing you the very emotions you so deeply felt for him.

You were unable to move as if glued to the spot near the sofa staring into space as cries wracked through your body. The man you thought you had stopped loving and had seemingly forgotten had just left and instead of feeling relief or a gust of calmness, you felt desolate. You were being forced to face the very reality that you didn’t just desire Sebastian, you were undoubtedly still in love with him. It didn’t matter that you’d been apart for so long, none of that mattered because what you felt for him was otherworldly.

And maybe you were the most ludicrous person in the world and maybe you deserved to get your heart broken many times again, but your feet dashed to the front door. You swiftly pulled it open, expecting to find the hallway empty. But Sebastian was still cemented there, back against the wall of the narrow hallway, with teary eyes. He pushed himself off the wall as your figure planted itself in front of him.

“Y/N.” He gently whispered your name. Frantic eyes meeting, both swollen and red, and his hands had moved to touch you in a desperate manner but they moved back as if scared you’d stalk back inside your apartment and leave him.

“When you walked out, I felt—I felt everything was closing in on me and this sudden rush of sadness washed over me. I don’t know why I feel this way about you, Sebastian. You know, maybe I’ll never be able to understand why after everything that’s happened between us we still have this strong connection. And I’m probably stupid for even contemplating this…”

Sebastian was holding onto every word you were uttering. Waiting for you to say the words he wanted to hear the most. He watched you pause, trying to gather your thoughts with your lip between your teeth.

“You get one chance, Sebastian. One chance and you better not fuck it up.”  You finally finished. Sebastian’s mouth had fallen agape first before a large smile began to form on his handsome face. He immediately moved his body to reach out to yours, but you backed away.

“Not so fast. We’re going to do things differently this time.” You pursed your lips. He was still beaming at you and you tried so hard to fight off the same expression from your face.

“I’m going to take you on a date. That’s the first thing I’m going to do.”

“What?”

“I’m going to do things differently this time, Y/N.” Sebastian was looking at you with gleaming eyes as if they were reserved just for you. His smile hadn’t faded away. 

“Tomorrow we’re going on our first date.”

----------

Good god this took me so long to write lol I feel like this is a horrible chapter! Next chapter will be the final one. Lee Bodecker is next on my list🥴

Thanks for reading y’all ♥️ 

@jeremyrennerfanxxxx123

[melancholydreadfuldream]

Hell-bound with you

Fandom: Doctor Who

 Pairing: Doctor x Reader

 Summary: You are the unwilling companion of the Doctor.

 Warning: ooc, plot holes as usual, dark!doctor, insanity, etc. You have been warned.

   A/N: I hope this post show up in search result  just fine. The part four of my other fic I posted at the end of last month just won’t show up in any search result, tags not working. I hope this one work okay.

     I watched in amusement from my spot as Jack tried to summon the Doctor but failed instead, he kept getting her companion. I couldn't help but laughed at the old man expression when Jack kissed him in the mouth. 

  I was surprised when the old man, Graham, revealed that the Doctor is now a woman. Jack is giddy with excitement as he wanted to see the Doctor so much. But he kept pulling in the companion instead. Yaz and Ryan. 

  Eventually Jack realized that the judoon technology is the reason why he can't pull the Doctor to him. Personally, I was grateful that the Doctor is not here. I wouldn't want to catch his - i suppose now - her attention. I admit I am a bit curious about how she looks like. The Doctor's first time as a woman, I wonder how she will act.

  My attention snapped back at Jack as he warned the companion about the lone cyberman. It was all very cryptic. 

  Turned out the companion has never encountered a cyberman before so they understandably are confused.

 Both Jack and I had suffered together in the short time since we met and you know what they said about forming a close bond during a life and death situation. It makes us comrade.

  Jack knew some stuff about me that I would never tell anyone. I am so grateful that I met him while stranded in this alternate universe. 

  Of course, it just my bad luck to have landed in a time period where cybermen overrun the world. I was lucky I met Jack. It would take me forever to sort thing out otherwise. I shuddered at the thought of being taken by cybermen for conversion.

  I didn't know what to think of the companion because I didn't know of them. I didn't know of the newest incarnation of the Doctor being female either. There were rumor floating around about it but I missed her first season on the account of finding myself suddenly existed within the impossible DW universe.

  I hated it. It wasn't fun. And I ended up ruining the Doctor's timeline. I had to run from him when he changed into that monster. Oh, I know he would come looking for me sooner or later. He would never let me go just like that. Misery loves company and all of that. Some part of him did blame me for changing him, I just know it.

  But running away and found myself stranded in another DW universe isn’t exactly how I planned my escape. The upside of being here is that I’m finally free of that person.

  I heard an amused chuckle within my mind and I frowned. Right, I guess technically I am still haunted by that person. I glared at the bow-tied figure that only I can see, a proof of my insanity. I tried to ignore him and his unwanted commentary on whatever it is Jack and I did.

  This particular universe thankfully still follow the canon, I think. I don't know if it will be a blessing or a curse my escape being here, knowing my luck it will ended up as another curse. I do know one thing, this time I have to avoid the Doctor at all cost. It will be hard, I'm sure, as I felt it so many times before back then, someone pulling the string and play on me like a puppet. Of course, no one believe me, not even that person.

  I didn't know the future of the Thirteenth Doctor but I will still be a threat to her should she realized what I am. That's what happened with that person. He insisted that I stay with him and everything has gone wrong ever since. 

  I tried not to think about that person and his now-never-happened future courtesy of me, of my presence, in his life.

  "(Name)?"

  I snapped out of my trance as Jack called out to me in concern.

  "Is it him?"

  I blinked when I realized I must have been talking out loud and thus gaining Jack and the companion’s attention. "I'm fine."

  Jack gave me a look that said he didn't believe my bullshit. 

  I ignored him. I noticed the companion are staring at me as if I was insane. I held back a frustrated laugh. Well, I am insane, somewhat.

  Jack introduced me to them. “This is (Name). She is with me.”

  "Is she a friend of the Doctor too?" Graham asked Jack.

  "Well..."

  "No." I firmly said as I glared at him in warning. "Oh, just shut up." I glared at an empty space on my left.

  The companion stared at me warily.

  “err, did she just talk to an empty space?” Ryan asked.

  “Yeah, she does that.” Jack replied, not taking his eyes off me.

  I tried to focus on Jack and the companion. I rubbed my forehead, feeling a headache forming.

  Jack's frowned as he observed me. "She's...complicated." He suddenly yelled in pain as the nano-genes started to attack him. He complained very loudly.

  I was worried for him. "It’s time. We should leave here, Jack." I said as I grabbed him. “You already did your part, warning them.”

  "You are right but there is...” Jack groaned. “...one more thing, (Name), you are not coming with me."

  "What?! What the hell are you talking about?" I punched his arms in annoyance.

  Jack rubbed his arms and give me a look. "You should go with them and stay with the Doctor."

  I was pissed. I thought he understand. "No. You..."

  "I know what you think of her but I still think you would be safer with her than with me. Also, maybe she could help you with him." Jack replied, turning to glance at the space I have been staring at before despite not being able to see what I see.

  "Like hell, I'm not going! And you can't make me!" I yelled petulantly.

  The companion stood there looking confused at our argument.

  Jack let out a sad smile. "I'm sorry, (Name)." He took my hand that is on his arm and let it go.

  I blinked in confusion and annoyance. I was momentarily distracted and Jack took that opportunity to activate the vortex manipulator on my person and I suddenly blip out of the ship and found myself on Earth instead.

  7777

  I almost lost my balance as I landed harshly. I cursed loudly.

  I saw the Doctor's companion materialized not too far from me.

  "Son of a..." I growled. "That damn head jar!!" I cursed Jack. "Shut it!" I snapped on the empty space near me.

  The companion stared at me warily.

  I groaned in annoyance.

  "We should go find the Doctor." Yaz suggested.

  "Yeah, you guys go ahead. I'm out of here." I said.

  "But I thought that Jack fellow said that you should stay with the Doctor?" Ryan asked.

  "Ignore that cheeky bastard's words!" I said and then stopped myself. "Except about the cyberman. That was true. Alright, I'm leaving." I waved at them and left despite their protests.

  Screw Jack. He is not the boss of me. 

  7777

  I walked without a purpose as I ponder over what I have to do next now that Jack has abandoned me. Like hell, I’m sticking around to see the Doctor no matter how curious I am of the female Doctor.

  “He’s right, you know, you would be safer if you stay with the other Me.” He said.

  I glared at him. “And what? Risking of her turning out like you because of me?”

  “I think you give yourself too much credit. I was always going to turn out this way sooner or later. Valeyard, remember?”

  “But you are not the Valeyard.”

  “Yet.”

  “And that’s what make it worse. I did this to you. I turned you...”

  “Victorious. That’s what I am, thanks to you. It wasn’t that bad.” He said with a shrug.

  “You burned down planets!”

  “I did that once in a while. You know this." He is referring to Gallifrey. "Besides, you know they deserves it.” He said as a dark expression crossed his features.

  “We lost Clara. I wouldn’t call that victorious!!”

  “And we avenged her.”

  I was ashamed that it was the truth. I did help him to avenge Clara’s death. In fact, I was the one who urged him to do it because I couldn’t accept her death. They haven’t even done Trenzalore yet. And now they never will. Because of me, Bow-tie won’t even get a new set of regeneration. But considering how he turned out, am I doing the world a favor by limiting his life to his eleventh self? Now he will not get the chance to regenerate into Eyebrow. Or did I just make it worse? Like he implied, he is very well on his way into becoming the Valeyard.

  “I am curious about the Doctor of this universe.” Victorious pondered. “I have never regenerated into a woman before. I was on my last regeneration right now."

  I tensed at that. I kept reminding myself that the person in front of me is not quite real so even if he did figures out the truth, there is nothing he can do about it. No Clara, no new regeneration. Unless he made me fill her shoes, play her role so to speak on Trenzalore. I hope not. Well, I had escaped him, somewhat. 

  The real Victorious probably was too busy right now to ponder about the calling of Trenzalore. And knowing him now, he might actually let Trenzalore burns.

  I think I bought enough time for myself so it might take him a while to locate me especially since I have a bio-damper ring on my person to hide the void stuff that apparently covered me when I first arrived in DW universe. With the ring, he won't be able to track me down easy. It also help hid my presence from the Doctor of this universe too.

  I sighed as I stared at my 'companion', the one only I can see, an accidental result after some weird mind meld with the Doctor. 

  When I first took a glimpse of him the first time I was stranded in this alternate universe, I thought he was somehow in my head, then I beginning to question my sanity, creating a shadow figure of the Doctor in my headspace. Seemed like I could never be free of the Doctor. Part of me believed I deserved it, to be haunted by the Doctor that I ruined.

  Sometimes I really thought he is the Doctor when he suddenly said things that sounded like something the Doctor will says. And then he is being all sarcastic with his unwanted commentary on everything I do and...meh I thought of him as a figment of my imagination designed as my personal demon to torture myself. But, weirdly he does know information that I could not possibly know, things that the Doctor or some other screaming genius might know but not little stupid, ordinary Me. There is no way if he is a hallucination created by me for him to know those complicated stuff. Anyway, thanks to that, Jack trusted me, I did save his life, both our life actually, by following the advice of the shadow Doctor. 

  Jack believe me albeit a bit reluctantly at first and eventually did trust me enough to watch each other back through hell and back. It was all very dramatic but also rewarding as we formed a friendship. Unfortunately, he's loyal to the Doctor hence he disbelieved me when I said I am bad for the Doctor, he still somewhat believe the Doctor is the answer to fix everything that could go wrong, even though he should know better. 

  I groaned as I ponder on what to do now. I understand the truth in Jack's words that I might need the Doctor of this universe help should Victorious able to track me down to this universe. But I am also right about my presence around the Doctor never bode well. So you see my dilemma?

  Thankfully the Doctor and her companion never look for me. I guess she is not curious enough with me.

  Back then as I watched the first two episode of season 6, I found it weird that bow-ties who supposedly adores children, didn't bother to look harder for little Melody Pond after she escaped the astronaut suit. Maybe there is some additional information about it from DW book or the audio-book but I never got my hands on them.

  Anyway this is good. It would be troublesome if she did decided to track me down.

  7777

  I thought I covered my track very well but the time bounty hunters somehow able to track me down at some black market in some random planet. It was weird but it seemed the Tardis translation circuit still work on me even if I am not anywhere near the Tardis. Or maybe it is thanks to that annoying 'companion' of mine?

  I'm following the advice of the shadow Doctor to find an equipment to, as he said he will indulge me for now, hide me better. I used my vortex manipulator given by River a long time ago at the Library. She taught me how to use it so that I won't accidentally kill myself while using it.

  Anyway after I purchase the said equipment and before I could use it per the shadow Doctor's instruction, the hunters found me.

  Honestly I hope the self defense lesson I got from River and then Jack would be enough to at least help me escape my pursuers. I thought I did good but they still found me.

  That's when the shadow Doctor 'helpfully' told me that I had a tracking chip somewhere inside my body courtesy of the real him. That bastard. Putting a tracking chip without my knowledge or permission like I am some freaking pets.

  I glared at him angrily.

  He grinned in amusement. "Hey, technically it wasn't me who did it."

  "Close enough..." I muttered.

  He told me the equipment I purchase earlier should destroy the chip into dust inside me without harming me in the process. Removing the chip would be better but without the correct equipment and a professional medical knowledge, it would be too dangerous.

  But before I could use it, they found me again. I was at some random abandoned building. One of them broke my wrist as I fought him. I screamed in pain.

  "Hey, don't hurt her! He won't be pleased!"

  "She won't stop struggling! She bites me!"

  I groaned in pain as they pushed my whole body on the wet floor.

  "She is not to be harmed in any way." Someone said. "The client is very specific about that one. He need her for something. He is willing to pay so much for her."

  My eyes widened in fear as I realized they are not planning to take me back to Victorious. That would be even worst. Are their client some enemies of the Doctor who is trying to take me as hostage? Or do they after the knowledge I have of the Doctor? But there is no way someone could know. I was sure Victorious remove all threat on me.

  I catches the glimpse of dark expression crossing the shadow Doctor's feature as he too listen to what the men had said.

  "Who even is she? Why do they willing to pay so much for her?"

  "Don't you know? She's the consort of that guy, the Doctor."

  I rolled my eyes in disdain at that misinformation but made no move to correct them. There is no point.

  "For real? But she is running from him? Why?"

  "Have you been living under a rock? That man has gone insane. Who would in their right mind stay with him?"

  "I heard the stories about him."

  "Not stories."

  "So, is it wise to betray him like this?"

  "You assumed we got the job from him but we didn't. By the time we hand her over to the client and got our money, with this technology to cross over universe..." He glanced at the elaborate vortex manipulator on their wrists which you assumed they got from the said client. "we can make a new life in some other universe. He won't be able to find us."

  The shadow Doctor chuckled coldly. "Whoever that client of their is, I know they are not stupid. To go after what is mine, they would have to take care loose end in order to remain undetected from me." He said as he observed the men. "That vortex manipulator probably has an expired date on it and more..."

  He turned to look at me, kneeling before me with almost a bored look. "I did warned you that you would have been safer if you stay with the other me."

  I glared at him. "Quit talking, do something." I hissed at him.

  He smirked. "You didn't say please."

  "Who is she talking with?" One of the men asked.

  They hauled me up to face them.

  "You are not very smart, are you?" I said with a smirk. "He is already here. The Doctor. Or should I say Victorious?"

  They looked around nervously.

  I pulled my sonic screwdriver, the one I stole from Victorious, and set out sonic sound, as instructed by him, that momentarily hurt everyone's ears but also caused some old hanging lamp to either explode or fell to the ground, causing chaos. 

  I ran immediately out of the building. Ignoring the growing pain in my wrist, I yelled at him to tell me how to use the equipment to destroy the chip. I moved the equipment to some spot of my neck and pulled the trigger.

  I clamped my mouth as burst of hot fire pain filled me. I gasped as I fell to the ground. Tears filled my eyes. I felt so dizzy.

  I distinctly heard him telling me to stay awake and ran. So I did albeit really slow.

  Like I said before, someone or something seemed to be pulling the string on me because as I made my weak escape, I found myself face to face with the companion I met with Jack weeks ago and there is a woman with rainbow stripes on her clothing with them. The Doctor, my mind supplied.

  Shit.

  "It's you." Ryan whispered, seemingly surprised to see me.

  "Doctor, she is the one we told you before. she was with Jack." Yaz explained.

  The woman glanced at me in guarded curiosity. She walked toward me and opened her mouth to say something but I fainted right into her arms.

  7777

  I woke up inside the Tardis in the medical bay. How did I know that? He told me.

  The Doctor, the female one, entered the room and smiled upon seeing that I already wake up.

  I no longer feel any pain, not on my broken wrist and on my neck. I assumed she fixed that. And someone changed my wet dirty clothes with something comfortable.

  I heard her yapping about the danger I put myself using the equipment she found with me. I didn't listen, still a bit too dizzy.

  "Who are you?"

  "(name)." I replied.

  "Ok, (name), I'm the Doctor. My fam said you were with Jack and that he instructed you to stay with me?"

  "He was wrong." I said bluntly. I forced myself to get up and stand up despite her protest. "I should leave."

  "You can't. We are in the vortex. Also you were hurt. Who hurt you? Also who put a tracking chip inside you? You destroyed the chip using that equipment. Are you running from a prison? Did Jack broke you out of prison?"

  I groaned and chuckled harshly. "You talk too much." I said as I clutched my pounding headache. "Prison, huh? I guess you could say that. Oh, shut up." I snapped at my right.

  "Who are you talking with?" She observed me curiously. "The fam told me that..."

 "I am a bit insane? That would be correct. Better stay away from me, doc." I said in derisive.

  She glanced at me.

  "Stop looking at me like that!"

  "Like what?"

  "Like I am some animal in a zoo."

  "I am so sorry."

  "For what?" I asked in confusion.

  "For whoever hurt you like that." She whispered. "Yaz changed your clothes. She said you have scars on your arms, consistent with someone being restrained and being injected and also..."

  "Stop." I glared at her menacingly. "That was private. None of your business."

  She, thankfully, stopped talking about that topic. But she suddenly pulled my sonic screwdriver. "How did you get this?"

  I took a deep breathe trying to calm myself over the fact that she and Yaz invaded my privacy. "It's mine."

  "Not possible." She said firmly.

  "Uh-oh, someone in trouble..." I heard him said in a teasing sing-song voice. I glared at him before turning to face her. 

  "Someone gave it to me." I lied. "Now give that back and let me leave." I demanded.

  She shook her head as she took a step back. "Did you steal this?"

  "Ding dong, she got it!" The shadow Doctor answered cheerfully much to my annoyance.

  Fine, I'm going to give her some shock value. "River gave it to me, satisfied?"

  The Doctor look shocked, her mouth dropped open. "You know River? River Song?"

  "That was a low blow, (name)." The shadow Doctor whispered at me in disappointment.

   "She was my friend." I spat. That wasn't a lie, technically. River was my friend but in the other universe, not in this one. "I'm sure you wouldn't know me, Doctor. She wouldn't talk about her friends with you. Mostly because you would not be interested." 

  The Doctor observed me, trying to spot the lie. She seemed satisfied to find none. But she is still suspicious though. "Why would she give you this?"

  "For my protection. I will only know how to use it whenever I was in danger." That one is not a lie since the shadow Doctor only tell me how to use it whenever I need to escape danger.

  She hummed at that, probably wondering if I ever misuse it. She didn't seem to keen of returning it though. At least she didn't confiscate the vortex manipulator.

  "Jack vouched for me. Do you think he would send someone not trustworthy to you?" I said. The answer is yes, by the way, because that traitor Jack ignored my warning how I am not good for the Doctor's timeline. If I am to stay with her, predictably things will not be canon again and it will definitely be hell-bound.

  The shadow Doctor chuckled at what I said.

  The Doctor didn't say anything.

  I raised an eyebrow. "I guess you don't trust Jack or do you only trust him when he is useful to you?" I asked in vicious tone. "Fine, keep the damn sonic screwdriver."

  "Oh now you have done it. She is not going to let you leave now." The shadow Doctor helpfully informed. "That is my 'i-don't-trust-this-person-i-need-to-solve-what-she-is-hiding' look." He grinned gleefully.

  I almost want to slap the jerk if not for the fact he is not really there so it is kinda pointless.

  Resigned to the fact that I am stuck with the new Doctor, I am determined not to let her in my head. A mistake I made with bow-ties which in turn caused him to become Time Lord Victorious.

  But I have no idea what the future hold for this version of Doctor and her companion. One thing for sure, the canon is about to go to hell, especially since I have no idea what to do and what to avoid doing.

  "I think you should stay with me. I can help you with whoever after you. But I need you to trust me."

  What a hypocrite. She doesn't even trust me. Why should I trust her? 

  "I don't want to intrude. Just dropped me back on earth at 2020." I said.

  "Oh, bad year." The shadow Doctor supplied. 

  "I insist you stay here for a while. After all, isn't that what Jack want me to do? Welcome to the Tardis. It is..."

  "I know what it is. River and Jack told me."

  "Well then...if they trust you, I am willing to give you the benefit of the doubt..." She smiled brightly. "Welcome aboard, (name). We are going to have adventure of the lifetimes."

  If she think I would rejoice, she is sadly mistaken as I stared at her flatly, not impressed.

  He chuckled at my expense.

  The Doctor glanced at my unimpressed look, sighed. "Well, you are a tough one."

  7777

  And so I ended up becoming the Doctor's unwilling companion...again.

  She re-introduced me with her fam and officially give me a room in the Tardis.

  Yaz is wary of me but Ryan and Graham are nice and friendly.

  And just like that I got pulled into their adventure. I tried to refused saying I'm feeling ill most of the time, preferring to stay behind but unfortunately the Doctor doesn't trust to leave me inside the Tardis.

  Does she think I could drive the Tardis or something? Seriously...

  7777

  I was stuck in a nightmare. I was back with Victorious and he punishes me for escaping. He trapped me in a special room designed to punish me mentally. He always did know I am weak mentally. He was surprised that I could survive this long by luck alone.

  I saw the laughing figure of a trickster, saying the joke is on me and...

  I woke up to the concerned face of the Doctor, the female one.

  I remembered now. I fell under the clutch of some wannabe gods from ancient Syria. They fed from people's nightmare.

  The woman, Rakaya, glanced at me wickedly, saying I have some delicious nightmare.

  The Doctor saves the day and able to trick the wannabe gods into eternal imprisonment.

  At the end, as I sat with a blank expression on my face on the stairs at the console room, Yaz and Ryan approached me and asked if I want to talk about my nightmare.

  I just said that I dreamed of being back in the room. They didn't push me for more. Yaz, being a police officer, probably suspected based on my scars, that the room was where I was imprisoned before.

  7777

  Darn it.

  Despite my determination not to get attached with the Doctor and the fam, I failed. Damn adventures and dangers and excitements, it does bound us closer with each other. I saved them, they saved me.

  "Admit it, you miss this, didn't you? The adventures, dangers, excitements?" The shadow Doctor teased me. "You got used to it already."

  "what about you?" I asked him. "Do you miss being the Doctor? Saving people and planets instead of destroying them on a whim?"

  He was silent. For once, he left me alone. I think I hurt his feeling despite him being a hallucination.

  7777

  Once I was almost taken by another bounty hunters, the Doctor rescued me and declared that I am under her protection and anyone who want to take me, will have to go through her first.

  The oncoming storm expression on her face is enough to make them back off and I was left in peace.

  The Doctor is not pleased that I still won't tell her the reason.

  "You have your own secrets and I have mine. Respect that!"

  "I can't protect you if you don't tell me the truth." The Doctor had said.

  "Fine, let me leave. I can take care of myself!"

  Both the Doctor and the shadow one snorted at me much to my anger.

  The fam has to interfered with our arguments. 

  "Cool off, the both of you!" Yaz demanded.

  Reluctant to leave for the next adventure but having no choice, I went with them. Another life-threatening incident passed with me rescuing Ryan, softened the Doctor and she apologies to me, sort of. 

  7777

  It finally happened. As Jack warned, the lone cyberman has come.

  The Doctor asked me the thing that the cyberman after so I told him about the cyberium. Jack did told me about it in passing. He was part of the alliance, after all. I guess he told me about it because he always planned to dump me at the Doctor. I admitted I hold a grudge against Jack for this still.

  The Doctor took me with her but instructed the fam and the rest to stay put. She asked me more about cyberium. I honestly don't know anymore but she kept pressing me, taking her frustration at me.

  To be honest, she frighten me at that moment, reminding me of Victorious.

  From the way the Doctor reacted when she explained about cyberman to the other, the shadow Doctor concluded that she must have lost someone to the cyberman.

  Bill Potts, my mind supplied. I knew she was supposed to be the Doctor's companion after Clara. Since Bill is not here anymore, I can only assume she is the one the Doctor lost.

  The Doctor raced against time competing with the cyberman called Ashad to get the cyberium before him.

  She eventually figured out the cyberium is possessing one of the residents in the house. She managed to trick the cyberium into leaving its current host.

  The cyberium is attracted to the Doctor for a host much to my horror as she started to blurt out something the Time Lord Victorious would say.

  I saw the shadow Doctor glanced at the other Doctor in amusement and curiosity. His eyes darkened with the lust for power. At that moment, he look so much like the real Victorious I have to believe he is truly him, not a pale imitation of him.

  He turned to look at me as he finally notice the look of dread on my face. "You see? The Doctor has always headed to this..." He said with a chilling smile. "It wasn't you who turned me, dearest (name)."

  "Get away..." I whispered in fear. I snapped out of it and yelled at the other Doctor, "Doctor, don't!" at the same time as Yaz.

  Thankfully, the Doctor snapped out of it too.

  The lone cyberman threaten to destroy the planet right that second if the Doctor refused him the cyberium.

  Having no choice, the Doctor give its back to him. I have failed Jack. I know she has no choice but this meant Jack and the alliance would be in danger again.

  As we returned to the Tardis, the Doctor made a plan to go after that asshat, I mean, Ashad. 

  She prepared some machinery in order to fight against the cybermen armies. At least she is confidence she could win this. 

  I planned to go with her to help and rescue Jack and then I am going to slap the hell out of him.

  7777

  Of course, things just don't worked as well as the Doctor planned. We are in the far future where the last of the human race located. I couldn't find Jack or the alliance.

  We are overpowered by the cybermen and got separated from each other. I ended up with Yaz and Graham while the Doctor is with Ryan.

  Somehow we ended up in cybership with the cybermen armies in the middle of waking up.

  We are trapped. Everyone is panicking. I heard Yaz tried to talk to the other Doctor via an unreliable communication device.

  I turned toward the shadow Doctor. "Do something!"

  He turned to me with a chilling smile. "I have taught you before, right?"

  I swallowed down my fear. "Please..."

  He sighed as if what I am asking him is too troublesome.

  I jumped when the steel door started to shake some more under the constant attack from the cybermen.

  "You remembered when you were taken from me by the Division?" He suddenly asked.

  I remembered it. I was taken, my mind half lobotomized in order to gain access on what I know of the Doctor. I woke up to everyone in the building died. I assumed Victorious did it.

  "I could activated the physic bomb I planted inside you."

  "What?!" This is the first time I heard this. "What the hell is that? Why do you insist of putting things in me?" I lost it at him. I am furious, wouldn't you be?

  "(name)!" Yaz called out to me in concern but I ignored her and the rest who thought I finally lost my marble.

  "Oh chill out, it won't kill you, well, only temporally." He said as he played with his nails.

  "Bastard!"

  "If I activated the psychic bomb, you and everyone in this ship will died, well not you obviously, and the cybermen but they will lost all function for roughly an hour or more. Enough time for you to escape, well, once you are resurrected that is." He said.

  "What about them?"

  "What about them?" He parroted. He shrugged. "Not my concern."

  "The hell with that! Save them too!" I demanded.

  "I warned you not to get attached..." He sounded bored now.

  "Find another way!"

  "Why should I?"

  "Please. You are the Doctor."

  "I'm not the Doctor anymore, remember?"

  "Fine, you are victorious! So prove it!! Save them and be victorious over the cybermen!!" I screamed at him, tears of desperation filled my eyes.

  He took a look at me and relents. "Fine."

  I let out a shaky relieved breath at his answer.

  He instructed me to tell the mechanic of the bunch with me to remove some electrical thingies to support enough for teleportation for all of us to escape.

  "It is not enough!" The mechanic said. "Only enough for four and there are seven of us!"

  "If only someone has a sonic screwdriver..." The shadow Doctor said mockingly. "Guess you have some decision to make, little (name), which four gets to escape with their life."

  I cursed the other Doctor for taking the sonic from me. To my surprise, Yaz pulled a sonic screwdriver from her bag.

  "She told me to give it back to you." Yaz explained.

  My mouth dropped open in shock. I laughed in near hysterical and turned to the shadow Doctor with a grin. "Tell me."

  He sighed in exasperation. "Fine."

  I used the sonic as instructed, giving the teleportation enough power to transport all seven. "Go!" I instructed Yaz and Graham and the rest to go first.

  "What about you?" Yaz demanded.

  "I have one last thing to do." I turned to the shadow Doctor as everyone left the ship. "Do it."

  He glanced at me with a look and smiled. "Being a martyr?"

  "Buying them some time. They are far enough not to get affected by the psychic bomb, correct?"

  "Correct."

  "And you are the one who said I will survived it so not a martyr."

  He hummed. "You sure?"

  "Do it."

  "As you wish."

  Just as the door crashed open, I screamed as he filled my head with so much pain it triggered the bomb creating a pulse of energy that sweep the cybermen off their feet.

  I clutched my heart as it was rudely stopped.

  The last thing I saw is the shadow Doctor hovering over me, muttering something I couldn't hear.

  "I only ask because triggering the bomb would send a signal directly to him..." He said. "He is coming, (name). I am coming."

  7777

  I slowly opened my eyes, found myself on the ground. "Oww..."

  The Doctor and the fam are there, surprised to see me alive.

  The Doctor scanned me with her sonic. "But...this is impossible." She blurted out. "You are only human, how can you...? You are immortal? Like Jack?"

  "Ugh stop talking. Can I get some water please?" I pleaded.

  Everyone stared at me weirdly but an old man thankfully gave me some water.

  The Doctor still couldn't get over the fact that I survived and demanded to know what I have been hiding from him.

  "Take it easy, doc, she did save our life." Graham said.

  The Doctor relented.

  "The cybermen..."

  "Out of commission for now. How did you do that?" The Doctor asked.

  "Tell you later."

  She glanced at me. "You better." She said firmly before turned to Ko Sharmus who showed us to the Boundary and there a portal opened.

  Both the Doctor and the shadow one blanched in horror when they recognized the ruins of Gallifrey.

  And then some random guy leaped out of the portal.

  "Master." I heard the Doctor spatted in disgust.

  "What?" I accidentally yelled. Last time, to my knowledge, the Master is Missy, though? What happened to her?

  "Like a pest...he just keep coming back, huh?" I heard the shadow Doctor said with a chuckle.

  The Master demanded the Doctor to go with him. She refused at first. But when he threaten to kill the rest of us, she relented.

  Reluctantly, she goes with the Master through the portal, instructing the rest of us to stay behind.

  "Follow them." The shadow Doctor demanded. 

  I stared at him as if he has lost his mind.

  "Do it!" The force of his words gave me headache.

  "Oh, alright! Geez!" I glared at him in annoyance but did as I told and the pounding headache lessened just a bit.

  Yaz and the other tried to stop me but I told them not to follow me.

  The Doctor is enraged when she saw me. "What the hell? (name), get back out there!"

  The Master is not pleased to see me either. "Control your pet, Doctor, or I will be forced to kill her."

  I glared at the shadow Doctor at my predicament of having two very angry Time Lord. "I have no choice, okay!" I said to them.

  The shadow Doctor chuckled and told me to say something for him intended for the Master.

  "Like hell, I'm gonna say that. He is going to kill me." I refused as I glared at the empty space beside me much to the confusion of two still very angry Time Lord. He wanted me to call him by his name 'Koschei'. I clutched my head. "Oh, fine!!"

  "You always have such a sort fuse, Koschei." I repeated word for word.

  Both the Doctor and the Master flinched and glared at me suspiciously.

  Great. Nice going. Is he planning to get myself killed?

  "How do you know that name?" The Master demanded.

  "He told me." I gesture to the empty space beside me.

  The Master stared at the empty space before chuckled darkly. "Your pet has gone insane, Doctor?"

  I stared at him flatly, trying to cover my fear. "The Doctor told me." which is the truth. "just not the Doctor you know." also truth since the Master technically never met bow-ties.

  The Doctor stared at me in confusion.

  "Yeah, don't care." The Master shrugged and pointed his gun at me as I raised my hand in surrender but the Doctor stood firmly in front of me, shielding me from him.

  "Don't you dare." The Doctor hissed at him.

  "You don't want to do that. Unless you want me stop both of your hearts." I said, more like repeating the shadow Doctor said.

  "Are you threatening me?" The Master look pissed.

  "(name), who are you talking with?" The Doctor turned around and grabbed both of my arms, demanding an answer out of me.

  "I..." Is this it? Do I have to tell her the truth? I turned to look at the shadow Doctor. I swallowed down hard as I look at the Doctor and then at the Master. "To answer your question, yes, that was a threat. How do you think I made the cybermen lost his function, Doctor? I have a psychic bomb inside me, killing me would trigger it, would kill myself and stopped both of your hearts. So unless you want an early death, I suggest you temper yourself." I said as flat as possible.

  Both Time Lords stared at me in shock.

  "Psychic bomb? Who did that to you?" The Doctor demanded in concern and slight fear.

  "The Doctor did." I said softly.

  She released me as if stunned.

  The Master curiously looked at me and the Doctor. "Oh fuck this, you ruined my moments, ape!"

  "(name)..." The Doctor stared at me as if I grow two head suddenly.

  "Come on you two, we need to be somewhere else right now!" The Master demanded.

  The Doctor grabbed my hand and took me with her as the Master led us the ruin of the citadel.

  As we entered the hall of matrix chamber, the Master suddenly hit me over the head, causing to collapse on the floor, losing my consciousness.

  Both Doctor and the shadow Doctor are enraged at my behalf. The Master claimed he need her attention on him, not on her stupid pet.

  7777

  I woke up to huge commotion. The Master is yelling something at a hologram of Ashad and his armies, asking them what happened. We could heard explosion. He turned to the Doctor asking her what has she done but the Doctor claimed it wasn't her.

  They were shouting at each other. Until a signal caught on his communication device.

  "A signal. The four taps of two hearts." The Master suddenly said in confusion.

  I glanced at those two as they started to bicker again. They are the last two Time Lords, so who was it that send him a signal?

  My heart suddenly beats faster as dread filled me.

  "The signal is getting close but something seemed to prevented it to come through..." the Doctor said as she pulled her sonic at the device that now emitting some sort of pulse. A portal suddenly appeared in the middle of the room.

  I turned toward the shadow Doctor who look at me fondly. I couldn't decipher the meaning of it for a time. He suddenly started to fade away and my eyes widened as I suddenly have a realization.

  "No!!" I shouted at both the Doctor and the Master trying to make them stop just as a pulse of energy exploded knocking all of us off our feet and I lost my consciousness once more.

  7777

  The portal opened. A man in bow-ties and dark purple suit stepped out of it.

  The Doctor and the Master groaned on the floor. They looked up to see the newcomer.

  The Doctor froze in shock when she saw her past-self. Her mouth dropped open.

  He fixed his bow-ties with a grin. "Finally..." He turned and glanced at the other two Time Lords. "Hello there."

  "Who the hell are you?" The Master asked.

  "Victorious, at your service." He said, bowing mockingly at them.

  The Doctor's face paled at the name. "But you can't be..."

  "Oh? Why not?" He asked.

  "You were me. And I never, he never..."

  "You are the Doctor. Interesting." He said, eyes gleaming in excitement.

  "You...are not me." The Doctor finally realized.

  Victorious turned toward the unconscious human at the floor. His eyes softened considerably as he walked and squatted before the human, one hand gently removed the strand of hairs covering the face. "I guess even here, you couldn't escape a Me after all, huh?" he said. He sighed as he cradled the human into his arms. His forehead touches the human gently. "Seemed like you still keep some secret from me too..." He glanced at the Time Lady before him with a chilling smile before turning to look at his human again. "You bad, bad girl, what is to be done with this?"

    A/N: I don’t know if there will be more. Maybe if inspiration hit, I will. Bear in mind, if I do write more, I might just add it in the same post instead of making another one so stay tunes? But for now, TTFN.

[all-the-love-harold]

She

This and ...Golden are a part of something that will one day be a best friend Harry series, but for now here’s some teasers until I have the time to write the whole thing. 

"She's just so…." Harry paused, searching for the right word to describe the girl he's falling in love with while he absentmindedly stirred his coffee. 

 Bitchy. Clara thought. She's only met Shelly once but she didn't have a good thing to say about her and she couldn't for the life of her understand what Harry saw in this woman besides her blonde hair and supermodel body. 

 "Magic" Harry finally finished his sentence, "she's fucken magic Ra" 

 "I'm glad you're happy H" she said solemnly, staring off into the distance. 

 “I’ve just never met anyone like her before” he said dreamily, he wasn’t even sure if he was talking to Clara or if he was just thinking out loud  “I’m not really convinced she’s real”

 “She’s real, H.” Clara wanted nothing else but to start talking about something else, anything, she’d talk about the weather if she had to.

 “I'm going to Marry her, Ra” He had never sounded so sure of anything else before. 

 “And I’ll be your best man, but are you sure? You’ve only known her for a few weeks and what have you really done together besides spend hours having sex?” 

 A sly smile emerged on his face and he shrugged “It’s good sex, the kind of mind blowing sex that I want to have for the rest of my life” 

 “You can’t base a marriage on sex Harry and you know it” Clara’s tone was becoming more and more irate. 

 "What's that tone for?" He said taking a sip of his coffee, a serious look on his face. It wasn’t often that Clara spoke her mind like this. 

 "I just don't think I know her well enough to see what you do, that's all" Clara said “and I don’t have sex with her so I’m not sure I ever will” 

 "There’s more to her than that" he said, starting to sound a little offended "we're going out tonight, why don't you join us?" 

 "I'm sure Shelly doesn't want me there," Clara said, infact she knew that Shelly didn’t want her there. How could she jump Harry’s bones with his sad lonely best friend interrupting her every move.

 Harry shrugged “She won’t mind, and I’d love it if you got to know her better” 

 “Fine” Clara sighed, “But I’m only coming out for dinner, I’ve got work tomorrow morning” 

 “Can’t argue with that” Harry smiled “And it’s my shout”

 “Good” Clara laughed 

 “And while we’re on the topic of life changing sex” Harry whispered so that Clara really had to listen  “You should think about getting yourself some” 

 “I had it, and he left, so I’m good for now” Clara said, gulping down her coffee. 

“I heard that sex” Harry smirked “That was not life changing sex” 

 “Whatever” Clara laughed “I’m not ready to move on yet” 

 Harry nodded “I know, he was your first everything, you’re actually coping with it very well” 

 “I know” Clara smiled “Now I’ve got stuff to do today, what time’s dinner” 

 “Bookings at 8” 

 “See you at 8 then” She got up and kissed him on the forehead before she left the living room. 

 *** 

 That evening rolled around and Clara still didn’t really want to go out to dinner, but she knew it meant a lot to Harry and that was the only thing that could convince her to dress up nicely and put makeup on on a sunday night when all she wanted to do was put on a face mask and watch a rom com. Come to think of it, that’s probably exactly what Harry had wanted to do too. Nonetheless, she put on her red dress that made her ass look fantastic and did a simple, natural makeup look and by the time she was ready to leave the house she was feeling pretty good about herself. 

 The restaurant was quiet when she walked in and she spotted Harry and shelly straight away, sitting in the back corner for a little privacy. 

 “Hi” she said as she walked up to them, placing a kiss onto Harry’s forehead as she sat down, like she always did. 

 Shelly scoffed “You’re late” she said “we already ordered” 

 “Oh, sorry H, I thought you said 8” 

 “I did” he smiled “We just got here a little early, that’s all. I ordered you the pasta” 

 Clara smiled “You know me too well” 

 “You’ve been a pasta fiend since you were 2 Ra, I’ve never seen you order anything else” 

 “Ugh” Shelly scoffed again “That’s so many carbs Clara, you better watch that, it will catch up to you one day” 

 Clara took a sip of her wine and smiled at Shelly “I’m sure I’ll be ok” 

 Harry could sense some tension between the two of them and decided to change to subject. 

 “So Ra, Shelly was just telling me that she had a friend that studied law at London Uni, graduated when you did too” 

 “What was their name? I might know them” Clara tried so hard to smile. She couldn’t imagine falling for someone that couldn’t get along with Harry, so she was going to try her hardest to get along with shelly. 

 “Will, Thompson, I think” Shelly said, “He’s just signed a contract with my family’s law firm” 

 “Oh I know Will,” she smiled fondly “He was the first person I met when I moved to London” 

 Harry and Clara shared a knowing look. Will was not only the first person that she’d met when she moved to London, but the first and only person she’s ever seriously dated. They only broke up a few months ago and there was no way that Clara was over it yet. 

 “We’re not very fond of him so far, he doesn’t seem to know what he’s doing a lot of the time”

 Clara wanted to scream, she wanted to stand up, throw her drink in Shelley's face and leave the restaurant without the tiniest bit of regret. But she also knew that someone saying bad things about Will shouldn’t upset her this much anymore. 

 “He’ll be good once he’s in the swing of things” 

 “I mean honestly, he spent six years at law school and he can’t even file a lawsuit properly” 

 Clara bit her tongue, “What does your family do?” she asked, trying to find some common ground. 

“My father owns a high end real estate agent” 

 “Oh” Clara Laughed “I’m sure he needs a good lawyer then” 

 “That’s how we met actually” Harry chimed in, trying to keep the conversation light. “Shelly’s dad was showing me flats a few weeks ago, Shelly was in the office when I went in and we hit off straight away didn’t we babe?” 

 “Stole my heart from the first glance” Shelly smiled at Harry

 Clara felt her heart skip a beat. “I didn’t know you were buying a new flat?” she asked 

 “I was thinking about it” he said “Nothing has caught my eye yet though”

 “How about you Clara, what do you do with yourself - I mean you’re obviously a Lawyer if went to school with that idiot” 

 Clara nodded “I work in copyright law, it’s not at all exciting” 

 “Yes” Shelly nodded “You do seem a little dull” 

 Clara let out a breathy laugh but stopped herself from saying anything to retaliate. Harry froze too, he’s never seen shelly act like this before, he’s never even heard her swear, let alone say nasty things like that. Silence ensued as their meals arrived and Clara couldn’t help but feel awkward, and all this talk about Will had her wishing he was right here beside her to tell shelly where to go. But that wasn’t the case and with each mouthful and moment of silence she felt more and more out of place. 

 Clara took her napkin and wiped her mouth, “you know what, I think I’m going to go” she stood up and took her hand bag off the chair, “I’ll call you tomorrow H” she kissed his forehead and away swiftly without another word.

[idreamtofmanderleyagain]

Ace-spectrum discussion to follow. If you aren’t ace it’s ok if you want to discuss, just keep in mind where this convo is coming from.

This is basically just a stream of conciousness post about something that has been in the back of my mind. Interested to see how other aro/aces/demis/greys feel.

Sometimes posts go around saying something along the lines of this:

“Platonic/familial love is just as deep and important as romantic love, it’s frustrating that allo people put so much intense emphasis on romantic relaitonships, and I wish as an aro/ace person that people would stop trying to force everything to be romantic and shippy just because the characters care about each other!!!”

In a recent one, responders said things along the lines of “yeah I wish people stopped arguing that characters who are deeply devoted to each other is automatically romantic evidence in canon,” etc.

I’ve kind of always had a wierd relationship with this issue because I’m demi, I LOVE romantic storytelling, and several of the fictional romantic relationships that I’ve clocked as romantic are things that allosexual people have tried to argue are an should always only be Purely Platonic (tm) or any other kind of dynamic but romantic, usually with some particular bias or agenda behind why they would argue that.

And when I say argue, I mean sometimes shame other people for shipping or even “deluding themselves” into seeing canonic subtext.

Just as a fairly well-known example, I’ve always viewed Clara Oswald an the Twelfth Doctor as a romantic relationship, which is romantic within the canonical subtext but a surface “friendship” in the sense that they were hiding their feelings for the entirety of the on screen relationship. And when I emphasize canonical, I mean it. I believe they were canonically in romantic love and I think this was a very obvious aspect of the subtext. I believe that this bothered some people because there was a visible age difference, some people hated Clara, an for others this directly interfered with their ship preferences in canon, among other things. But I still believe it was there.

Now, if you’re ace and you feel represented by that relationship, there’s nothing wrong with personally viewing it at platonic. I think it has a lot of room in it to be many things for different people.

That said, a big part of the problem seemed to be personal bias combined with the fact that the romantic angle was handled with more subtlety. There wasn’t obvious sexualized antics (like with River) or YA-level romantic flirting and tropes (like with Rose). The relationship was much more focused on a deeper, complex and intense emotional connection. Like what appeals to me as a demisexual. And in fact I view the Doctor as a demisexual personally, which really is part of why the way their relationship played out on screen made so much sense to me as a romantic connection. This was what it looked like for a demisexual in love.

So all of that said, I’ve often felt underrepresented both by this particular conversation sometimes, and allosexuals forcing every romantic relationship to look one particular way, i.e. heavy sexual tension, flirting, kissing, literal dating, etc. from the point of the characters meeting.

Like, I’ve heard allo people force “why does it have to be romantic,” or “just because you thought they were gonna get together in the end doesn’t make it canon lol” or “intense emotions/devotion isn’t proof of romantic feelings!!!” frameworks onto the things that I’ve gotten invested in, or even interjected over the meta that I and others have generated for those things. So those phrases automatically kind of frustrate me, because while from aro/ace people I can understand feeling frustrated for their own reasons, those are often the same phrases used to shut me down, basically.

Furthermore, A lot of the characters who’ve I’ve found appealing in a “I’d like to see them in a romance” context are characters that a lot of allo people don’t view in a sexual/romantic context at all. Which is not a problem per se, but it’s an aspect of my experience as a demi person in fandom.

I want to make it clear that I don’t think aro/ace people are responsible for this problem. I think this is primarily allo people co-opting certain phrases to justify themselves for reasons that have nothing to do with aro/acre rep.

That said, I there’s something about these conversations that always makes me feel a little left out, or even erased. As a demisexual, my romantic/sexual feelings manifest from friendships and emotional connection on a platonic level. So sometimes intense onscreen friendships or other emotional connections are potential for romantic experiences in fiction that represent my own experience the most out of everything, and a lot of people (particularly allos) seem to get negative, mocking, or even hostile when I and others in my ship groups frame those relationships as romantic.

I’ve never connected this to my demi experience before this moment, because so many of my favorite ships have other aspects that people plant their flag in for argumentative justification. I like a lot of villain/heroine for example. But this framework is something that pops up a lot, and contributes to that feeling of un-acceptance and negativity from a whole different angle. And it’s making me aware that maybe my negative experiences shipping in fandom are connected to the demi experience in a very sublte way.

I don’t think my experience is any worse than somebody further on the other side of the aro/ace spectrum of course, it’s just something I’ve been feeling about this conversation that I haven’t known how to voice.

It’s wierd, because it’s the small stuff like this that makes me feel less connected as part of the aro/ace community, and it’s kind of why I don’t know where I even belong.

[honesthammie]

4th prompt part 2

The silence was appreciated as your mind wrapped up today's event. You had met your soulmate in a goddess of a woman. Everything you had discovered so far was perfect. You watched as she pulled a metal disk and metal stick from her pockets. The metal stick made a strange buzzing sound and glowed a faint orange at the tip as she hovered over the disk.

"What are you doing?" You asked after watching her in curiosity for a few moments. You would've let her continue as her face was quite the sight. Her eyes were sparkling with intent and her nose had the most adorable scrunch.

She stopped for a moment as you spoke as if thinking on what to say before continuing. "I'm scanning for any spider eggs in the building so we can take them with the other spiders to a planet of their own. A planet without civilisation but full to the brim with creatures they can eat. I think, the fam got them all. No, fam still doesn't seem right. The team does sound better!"

"A planet? What, are you some kind of alien?"

"Yes. Would that be a problem?" She asked. From the way her eyes sparkled, I believed her. Great, no wonder why she seemed so ethereal! So when I say, she's out of this world, it'd be a fact and not a flirtatious comment! For fuck sake, that's one of my best lines as well! Maybe I could use it when the time is right?

"Nope. After the discoveries of my life recently, that's actually the most believable thing. Please don't ask yet. However, those spider babies trust me. You aren't going to get them to listen without me. I spent at least a full 5 hours with them, they trust me more than you. Come on little Miss Sunshine, hop to it, the spiders won't wait forever." I spoke with confidence. I knew she knew, she needed me. That's why she followed me. "I'm (y/n) by the way"

"Great name! Love that name, was always one of my favourites. I've always fancied myself as a (y/n) but the faces never seem to fit it. I'm normally a John but I can't be now I'm a woman. Why don't you give me an alias for when I'm undercover?"

"Hmmm. I quite liked the name Alice and you certainly suit that name. Is there a name people call you when you aren't undercover. What do family call you?"

"Alice. I love that! I'm keeping Smith. Alice Smith. Perfect! Knew you'd be the one to help me. People tend to call me the Doctor. So do I for some reason. Wish I knew why."

This cute blonde alien was more mysterious the more we talked. She told me of how her ship goes in time as well as in space. She told me of the time of when she met Robin Hood with an older face and a companion named Clara. All this talk and I wasn't bothered once by it. I could listen and watch her all day as she talks about adventures she's been on. She puts all the theatrics on and waves her arms about with so much passion and her eyes show her emotions so clearly. But I also saw age. If she's older than she looks, just how old is she? Not that it bothers me, it's just, if she's like hundreds of years old, she's probably had other lovers and I don't know if plain old me can compete with that.

Sooner than we realised, we came towards a blue Police box. She clicked her fingers and waltzed right in. This must be her TARDIS. I walked inside with awe. The ship was beautiful inside. Like a gem hidden as an ore. The golden and blue lights perfectly reflected her personality.

"It's fucking massive Sunshine! Ya didn't warn me about walking into a football field! No wonder why thousands of spiders seemed no problem! Fucking hell!" I stated as my eyes scanned the room in front of me. Then I felt a little tug on my right trouser leg. I looked down and saw a little spider wanting my attention. I bent down and picked him up. He seemed happy to be held like that so I kept him in that position as I wondered towards the Doctor.

I had so many questions I wanted to know and I'm sure she has too. But now was not the time for that. We needed to get these spiders to their new home. I continued to watch the Doctor as she danced around something she called a console. She was pressing buttons and pulling levers and many more things until the ship made a strange wheezing noise and I was thrown off my feet. Thankfully I was caught by someone. I looked up and saw an oldish man.

"Hello Love! I can tell this your first time here. We all fell down when she first did that with us. You learn to find something to grab onto. I'm Graham by the way." Graham spoke gently but loudly over the noise of the ship. I couldn't help but giggle, my grandad used to call me Love too.

Then as quick as the ship started, it came to a gentle stop. I looked around and notice the same 2 people from earlier. The girl was smiling and laughing to something the boy mentioned. They must be old friends. I then noticed the Doctor walk towards the doors and open them just enough for her to check outside.

"Right (n/n). I'm calling you that as we are friends now. Go on, it's your first new planet and you care about these spiders more than we do so I think it's best if you check everything it perfect for them!" The Doctor spoke with excitement. She even clapped her hands for a moment, obviously not being able to control the surge of energy running through her.

I held the spider in my arms and the doors opened in front of me. I closed my eyes for a moment as the light blinded me temporarily. I could feel the warmth of a sun and the cool breeze the gently whipped past your face giving you the perfect cooling needed. The planet smelled sweet yet sour like Toxic waste sweets. I could hear many creatures making strange noises, some were doing a high pitched growl and some others were doing deep scream. Then there were nicer sounds like birds tweeting but in a lower key and something sounded like a piano, specifically an old ragtime piano.

I slowly opened my eyes and noticed the silver sky and its 4 suns in each direction. I noticed that the high pitched growl was from a small flying frog like creature and the deep scream was from a big rabbit- horse like creature that was just chewing the purple leaves off the metal looking trees. The bird like sound belonged to a small Robin like creature, but instead of a red chest it was a beautiful blue hue and it had silver eyes that sparkled just right. The Ragtime piano sound belonged to a dog-raccoon like creature that scampered away with its mouth full of the fallen berries that the rabbit-horse dropped from the leaves. The grass beneath was as black as ink and the pond to the right of me was a strange red colour.

"Well what do ya think? I personally think it's perfect but you seem to know these arachnids better than me so, I could be wrong, although, I'm not often" The Doctor spoke with eagerness. I noticed her looking at me as I took in the world around me. Why does this feel all too familiar to me? Why do I like the escapism of Earth? Why is this so, freeing?

I took a deep breath in. "Its perfect Doc. The spiders will love it here! They'll adapt pretty quickly I believe. The creatures are big enough to satisfy them. Although the sounds are a little off putting." I put the spider in my arms in the oddly cotton soft grass and watched as the thousands of others followed in its footsteps. Some carried the baby spiders and others carried the eggs. They had already found a cave to lay the eggs and started weaving some webs within 10 minutes.

Once I was happy with everything, I said my goodbyes and entered the strange ship once more. I could feel fresh tears sting my eyes like tiny hot needles. I get so attached so quickly and I noticed the string warm up and I checked on my soulmate, she was looking at me with an all too familiar look, the look of complete adoration. So the string tells me when her love for me evolves until we kiss? I mean, that's when it disappears for everyone else.

"This was great Sunshine! I had a ride of a lifetime, I really did. So I guess, you can drop me off home, I'm probably not wanted and I don't wanna ruin your team dynamic here."

"Why on Earth would you think that? I was actually wondering if you'd like to join us. Those spiders trusted you and having someone like you would really make the adventures more thrilling. Besides, I really like you and there's something special about you and I can't place my finger on it. I don't like not knowing things. If I drop these off home for a bit, would you mind if I ran some tests on you?"

"Really? Sure. I don't mind. I actually wanna know aswell. You see, I know what's special but I don't want to tell you in front of the others, its a bit embarrassing." I asked whilst blushing. She nodded her head and set the TARDIS coordinates to Sheffield. The Doctor promised she'd be back in a week and set the TARDIS to float in our solar system whilst she got to work on me.

We walked into what I can assume is some sort of med Bay. The walk had conversations about the last planet and how we thought the spiders would adjust. Eventually she sat me down on a white bed.

"So, you said you knew why you were special. I don't like cliffhangers so I'll give you a custard cream if you tell me." She said as she got a paper document and waited for me to speak.

"I don't know how or why but have you ever heard of the red string of fate story?" I asked, wondering how to word this without sounding weird. She nodded her head in understanding. "Well, when I turned 16, I could see everyone's red strings. The world was covered in red. I was confused at first until I read that story."

"Hmm. That is interesting because all stories have some truth to them. Some are exaggerated and some are exactly as said. Well that story is a good example of that. Thousands of years ago, there were 2 species of human, homo sapiens and homo spectrians. Spectrians were low on numbers in population as they'd spend almost all their life playing match maker. You'd know Spectrians as Cupids. However when battles and wars happened, Cupids were out of a job as everyone had to focus on the country and not themselves. This is where arranged marriages started happening and Cupids were becoming depressed. Eventually the Cupids decided to blend in with the humans and became virtually extinct. You might be the only Cupid left in the universe, other than Valentine himself." She explained it so well.

"Can Cupids see their own string?" I asked. She paused for a moment. Her eyes flickered between heartbroken and hopeful. I felt the string flicker between cold and toasty warm just like her eyes.

"No. Cupids weren't supposed to have soulmates. But I guess you are technically half human so maybe that makes sense. Do you know who your soulmate is?"

"She's amazing. She's like a Goddess. When I first saw her I immediately thought, She's too fucking perfect for someone like me. She incredibly smart too but, can be oblivious. I mean, I only met her a few hours ago and I'm fucking smitten with her. She reminds me of sunshines and rainbows. I'm just waiting for her to make a move." I told her. She looked at me for a moment, processing this new information. She smirked for a moment once she figured it out.

"Well my soulmate had me wrapped around her finger the second she jumped in front of a spider to save her life. A bold move like that normally makes me mad but, she did it so well. I haven't known her long but I can see me being by her side forever, travelling the stars. She reminds me of those stars actually. The way she sparkles in the light. I love you (y/n) with both of my hearts." She spoke softly as we slowly leaned in. When she finished, she planted her soft lips on mine and the red string was gone. Not that I noticed until an hour later when we picked the team up and held hands to announce our relationship.

Maybe dating a sunshine is exactly who I needed.