#why does it feel like i owe the world an apology for being who i am

[zedif-y]

sometimes its like my life is just one big call for help

[blissfullyecho]

Advice for having a fresh start in life? Your advice is always spot on and I'm definitely getting your book and templates.

How to Reset Your Life & Have a Fresh Start

A fresh start doesn’t come from some “motivational” quote you read on Instagram. It doesn’t come from “clearing your mind” or waiting for the perfect time. A fresh start is for the people who realize one very simple truth: everything you want is already within your reach, you just have to stop making excuses and claim it.

Here’s the deal: You don’t need a “fresh start” in the way most people think. That’s just their way of trying to press reset because they’re too scared to be ruthless with their own potential. What you need is a transformation, and that’s something no one else can give you. If you’re looking for a fresh start, stop playing small and start living like the person you want to become today.

Rule #1:

Stop waiting for life to give you a break. No one owes you anything, and the world isn’t just going to hand you what you want. If you want a fresh start, you need to take it. You need to be so unstoppable that the world literally can’t ignore you. You want a fresh start? Create it by burning the old version of yourself to the ground. Forget the person you were last week or last year. That person doesn’t exist anymore, and you’re about to be something completely different.

Rule #2:

Cut the dead weight. People, habits, places—anything that doesn’t elevate you, cut it out. You can’t have a fresh start while carrying around the old junk that’s weighing you down. That means saying goodbye to anyone who doesn’t bring you closer to your goals. Your energy should only be spent on things and people that reflect your highest potential. If they don’t add value, they’re a distraction—and distractions don’t deserve a seat at the table.

Rule #3:

Get comfortable with discomfort. Growth doesn’t happen in your comfort zone, and if you think a fresh start is going to be all rainbows and sunshine, you’re already sabotaging yourself. It’s going to be uncomfortable, it’s going to test you, and it’s going to push you to your limits. But guess what? That’s exactly what it takes to be successful. Embrace the grind. Embrace the hustle. You want change? Work for it like your life depends on it—because it does.

Rule #4:

Never, ever apologize for your ambition. A fresh start doesn’t mean getting humble—it means owning your power. Stop being shy about what you want. Stop waiting for validation from people who will never understand your vision. You’re not here to play nice or make people feel comfortable. You’re here to dominate.

Rule #5:

Set a standard for your life that’s so high, most people will think you’re delusional. But here’s the kicker: the higher your standards, the faster you’ll get there. I didn’t get to where I am by settling for less than what I deserve. If you’re not aiming for the top, then what are you even doing? The only fresh start that matters is the one where you don’t settle, you don’t back down, and you don’t stop until the world is at your feet.

Rule #6:

Become obsessed with your vision. Most people try to balance their lives, but if you want a fresh start, you need to be all in. No more distractions. No more “maybe next time” or “I’ll try again.” You’re in this to win, and you’re going to make it happen. A fresh start is about becoming relentless in your pursuit of your goals. You don’t give up. You don’t wait. You just make it happen.

A fresh start isn’t a cute reset—it’s a complete reinvention. It’s shedding everything you thought you were and stepping into the person you were always meant to be. You don’t need permission. You don’t need a new year or a new month. You need to look in the mirror, decide you’re done with who you were, and step into your future now.

Now go out there and remind the world why you’re the one they should be watching.

[setmeatopthepyre]

fuck it friday

not tagged by anyone 'cause I'm being the change I want to see in the world etc etc etc

from pothos | pathos pt 1 | pt 2 | pt 3 | pt 4 | pt 5

-

Eddie is on his couch, aimlessly swiping through housing listings, vaguely hoping that the next generic wide-angle picture of a soulless sunny living room will suddenly give him all the answers he needs, when the doorbell rings.

He opens the door without looking. He gets as far as “I’m still all out of flour from last time--" when he realizes it’s not Buck on his doorstep at all. It takes a second because he's not used to seeing the captain of the 122 in anything other than a suit or a set of turnouts. “Deluca?” he says, surprised. “I thought poker night was next week.”

“I ain’t here to clear you out this time, Diaz,” Deluca says.

Eddie huffs. As if. The man barely has a filter and that translates fairly directly to the efficacy of his poker face.

“Are you gonna let me in, or what?”

“Sure. If you tell me to what I owe the visit.” Eddie’s already stepping aside, letting him in.

Deluca strides in like he owns the place, crossing his arms as he takes in the living room. “Is it just you?”

“Yes…?” he says slowly, following him in. He snatches his nearly-empty bottle from the table, lifts it and points from the bottle to Deluca in the universally understood gesture for you want one?

“Yeah, sure,” he says.

Deluca doesn’t offer up an explanation for his presence as Eddie cracks open two bottles of beer, hands one off to the man still standing in his living room like he’s trying to decide if he wants to be there at all, and sinks down onto the couch again for lack of anything better to do.

Deluca doesn’t sit, but he does take a long swig of his beer and narrow his eyes at Eddie. Finally he asks, “You seen Tommy?”

Eddie nods. “Couple of days ago. Why?”

“Any clue what the hell is wrong with him?”

What, this guy, too? Eddie rubs at his eyes. “How about you tell me why you’re asking?”

Deluca glares at him some more, seems to come to some decision, and sinks down on the other side of the couch with a huff. “He skipped out on my little girl’s birthday.”

Eddie blinks. He isn't sure what he’d been expecting, maybe something more akin to Buck’s vague hunches, but not… this.

He does vaguely recall the subject of Deluca’s kids coming up at poker night, though. Racks his brain for a second. “You’ve got three kids, right?”

Deluca eyes him for a second, but it’s less of a glare this time. “Yeah. Two girls and a boy. Oldest just turned ten, youngest is three.”

“Huh,” is all Eddie finds himself saying. Thinks for a moment, again, of Christopher, of the birthday party Eddie only got glimpses of over a video call. He really needs to stop procrastinating and just pick a damn house. Maybe he should just go to El Paso and see from there.

But this isn’t about him.

“And… Tommy usually goes to your kids’ birthday parties?”

“Goddamn right he does. He’s their favorite uncle.”

Uncle? “Hold on, you guys are…?”

“Jesus H. Christ, Diaz,” Deluca says with a roll of his eyes. “Do you want a copy of my family tree? No, we ain’t related, but we might as well be.”

Eddie raises a hand in surrender. The guy’s clearly passionate about this.

“The important thing is,” Deluca continues, eyes intense and jabbing a finger in Eddie’s direction, “The man has showed up to every single goddamn birthday and big event, and now he skips Sophie’s big ten? Something’s goin’ on.”

There’s a simple solution to that, if you ask Eddie. “Did you ask him about it?”

“Who the hell do you think I am? Of course I did. You know what he did?” Eddie gets the feeling he’s not actually expected to answer and Deluca proves him right. “He goddamn apologized.”

He frowns. “I don’t know man, that seems… reasonable?”

Deluca gets to his feet with a grunt of frustration, starts pacing. “Don’t be an idiot, Diaz. You have any clue what Tommy does when he knows he’s fucked up?” It’s another rhetorical question. “One of three things,” Deluca says, raises one finger. “Either he gets defensive and turns into the world’s most sarcastic asshole--” A second finger goes up. “He turns into a pathetic pile of misery and then moves heaven and earth to make things right--" Third finger. “Or he shuts down completely. What he doesn’t do is fuckin' apologize and then pleasantly ask me if Sophie had a nice day. So you better tell me now, what the hell did Buckley do to him?”

“Now hold on,” Eddie sets his bottle down, gets to his feet as well. “Buckley--- Buck didn’t do anything.”

“Yeah? Then why the hell does Tommy tell me they’ve broken up and then turn into a fucking pod person?”

Eddie sighs. He’s pretty sure he’s getting a migraine or something. “You better ask him, because he broke up with Buck, not the other way around.”

Deluca falters, mouth snapping shut from where he’d looked about ready to yell at him some more. “What?”

Eddie raises his eyebrows, shrugs.

“That goddamned idiot,” Deluca mutters.

-

tagging @sugarpenchant @beanarie @rcmclachlan @emphasisonthehomo @rimatsu @trombonechurchill @leashybebes @geddyqueer @ambernotember

tag list for those who requested tags for this fic under the cut ↓

@fiyaerrigan @bisexualbrainrots @leashybebes @louuieferrignojr @rubydaiquiri @teabroomsandbooks @crimsonwildcat-blog @sweaters-and-silly @nochance-noway @manifestingchaoticvibes @hyperfocusthusly @frogsinflannel @beanarie @rcmclachlan @sad-girl-hours23 @ambernotember @apartmentsmoke @bidisasterevankinard @agentpeggycartering @eliotwaughdeservesbetter @daughterofscotland

let me know if you wanna be added or removed!

[goldsainz]

❝ WE’D BE A BIG CONVERSATION ❞

MASTERLIST!

pairing . . . carlos sainz x leclerc!reader

◦∘｡ﾟ. request . . . “Carlos x Leclerc!reader and how the media would react?🤭 ❤️”

◦∘｡ﾟ. summary . . . even if the world can’t make up its mind about you, you’ll still be endgame.

◦∘｡ﾟ. note . . . HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO TAY TAY!!! i had to make something at least related to her… although most of my fics are based on her songs so i owe her a lot for all the variety she has on her catalogue 💙 on another note, now that i’m back i gotta keep the fics coming so i hope to put one per week (don’t hold me to that). this is also soooo longggg im sorry😭

liked by lorenzotl, carlossainz55 and 207,843 others

yourusername living my spanish villa life

view all 1,609 comments

carlosfan1 carlos in the likes!!!!!

ynfan1 she’s the love of my life

charles_leclerc Trop belle ❤️

liked by yourusername and 26,139 others

arthur_leclerc Why are you in spain?

arthur_leclerc Come back to Monaco

⤷ yourusername no

⤷ arthur_leclerc I’m telling maman

⤷ yourusername go right ahead, i’ll tell her all about those plates that suddenly disappeared

⤷ arthur_leclerc Truce…?

⤷ yourusername yayyy

ynfan2 crying at arthur being clingy😭

user1 girl it’s the middle of august aren’t you sweating your skin off?

⤷ yourusername beauty is pain ❤️

⤷ ynfan3 LMFAO

liked by landonorris, reyesvdec and 1,283,059 others

carlossainz55 Summer 💛

view all 19,245 comments

carlosfan21 trying not to freak tf out rn…

anasainzvdec Que veranillo 🙌

liked by carlossainz55, yourusername and 71,024 others

carlosfan22 WHAT IN THE ACTUAL FUCK

ynfan21 why did y/n like carlos sister’s comment🤨

⤷ carlosfan23 she did what?!?!

⤷ ynfan21 she unliked it a while after… but i screenshotted it cause it was so weird

⤷ ynfan22 this + him liking y/n’s latest post is giving soft-launch

carlosfan24 expected silly season, got love season

carlosfan25 patiently waiting for the f1 detectives to uncover who that is 😁

ynfan23 THAT IS SO Y/N

ynfan24 i’d like to issue out an apology for how annoying i’ll be if that is in fact y/n

⤷ carlosfan26 me too

⤷ pierregasly Me three

⤷ ynfan24 WHAT??? PIERRE???

⤷ francisca.cgomes pierregasly that is not your burner…

⤷ pierregasly Shiiiiit

⤷ ynfan25 there’s a lot to unpack here😭

yourusername updates their instagram stories!

francisca.cgomes responded to you story!

francisca.cgomes you’re in italy rn 🤨

yourusername i knowwww

francisca.cgomes so why aren’t you enjoying

yourusername cause charles and arthur and lorenzo are hovering over my shoulder like im gonna blow up the ferrari motorhome which mean i can’t see my mannnn😫

francisca.cgomes pierre can take care of charles, and then i’ll ask charlotte if she can distract lorenzo… maybe you can talk to carla so she’ll keep arthur busy?

yourusername I LOVE YOU! YOU’RE A LIFESAVER!

francisca.cgomes you can thank me later!!! go see carlos while you can

yourusername right okay bye bye

francisca.cgomes 😘

liked by lailahasanovic, olliebearman and 297,150 others

yourusername italy you were amazing!!!!!

view all 4,457 comments

ynfan31 HELLO???????

ynfan32 did not expect this when i opened insta

carlosfan31 oh.

arthur_leclerc Answer my calls

arthur_leclerc Don’t ignore us, Y/N

charles_leclerc ???

lorenzotl Interesting

user31 where’s the jacket from?

⤷ yourusername bershka 🩵

⤷ ynfan33 BYE NOT HER IGNORING HER BROTHERS

carlosfan32 okay but what does lorenzo know why is he so chill 🤨

ynfan34 it’s giving ferrari royalty

ynfan35 the way her eyes were glowing while watching carlos on the podium… they’re in love IN LOVE

carlosfan33 HOW DOES IT FEEL TO LIVE MY DREAMMM

yourusername updated their instagram stories!

liked by yourusername, lewishamilton and 1,783,902others

carlossainz55 Singapore you’ll forever be in my memory

view all 26,758 comments

yourusername mi amorrrr

yourusername winner of singapore and my heart

⤷ carlossainz55 Mi corazón es todo tuyo también ❤️

yourusername 🫠🫠🫠

carlosfan41 they’re so endgame coded

⤷ ynfan41 so reputation coded in general

carlosfan42 y/n is so me thirsting over carlos

carlosfan43 god i’ve seen what you’ve done for others

ynfan42 why does it feel like charles and arthur are so detached from y/n lately???

⤷ carlosfan44 OMG YES I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR SOMEONE TO SAY THIS

⤷ carlosfan45 i think since monza we’ve had no content with them… we went from silly stories to radio silence

scuderiaferrari ❤️🍾

liked by carlossainz55 and 68,035 others

ynfan43 these are my parents now

ynfan44 this is everything to me!!!!!!!

carlosfan46 singapore will forever be in my memory too 🥹

translations:

— mi amorrrr : my loveeee — Mi corazón es todo tuyo también : My heart is all yours too

-ˋˏ *.· taglist . . . @lorarri @lpab @noncannonships @lunnnix @elliegrey2803 @schumacheer @saintslewis @leoramage @toomuchdelusion @anthonykatebridgerton @enhacolor @gulabjamoon @toomuchdelusion @goldenalbon @ravisinghs-wife @nouvellevqgue @hobiismyhopeu @celestialpato @lecsainz @kkeels @darleneslane @avengersheart

[altheneum-library]

Hello! I don't use Tumblr much so I don't know if it has to be requested here. I wanted to ask Astro from Dandy's world xfem reader to have the personality of Power from chainsaw man

Sorry for the inconvenience and if this is wrong, it means I use a translator.

INCLUDES: Astro/Reader (female), unlabeled relationship

CONTAINS: limited knowledge on chainsaw man but Powers is pretty cool

ASTRO WITH A FEM!READER WITH POWERS' PERSONALITY FROM CHAINSAW MAN:

🌹 Astro dislikes you quite heavily at first, none of the toons liked you at all due to how you were. You're not like them, or him, at all. You're pretty egotistical and arrogant while also being a brat who loves violence.

🌹 heck, he even avoided you and talked more times with Shrimpo than he does you! and even Shrimpo dislikes you the most...

🌹 you were willing to hurt others just to put yourself up and Astro doesn't stand for that at all, so in turn, he never gave you dreams at all. not even a singular nightmare. you weren't worth giving dreams to.

"Why are you like this? We've never done anything wrong to you..."

🌹 despite his ire, you seem to like teasing and messing with him the most and he gets quite annoyed at you more often than most are ...but then there was one day, when you we're particularly thoughtful.

🌹 it made Astro curious...to see you not do anything in the ordinary was...well, out of the ordinary. he knows he shouldn't ask but he was too curious and asked you what you were thinking of...

"what are you thinking of. [NAME]?"

🌹 you had gotten embarrassed, your words stammered as you insulted him before storming off

🌹 for once, he found that...endearing?

🌹 not once had he seen you get so flustered and embarrassed and not once had he seen you stammer and stutter over words before storming off like you had lost a competition of wit...

🌹 since that day, he wonders if your actions we're just a facade, after all. it's not like Shrimpo wanted to feel hatred for everything and everyone 24/7 and it took him a long time to move on from that....

"are you the same too? perhaps I owe you that apology..."

[lamentingmidna]

i love meruem because of feminism

gonna yap about meruem and how his character comments on a nontraditional portrayal of masculinity.

im doing this for me after seeing these election results

because yeah, he's a shounen protagonist (yes! protagonist! but thats a different yap sesh for another day), he's big and strong and the GOAT or whatever. but consider the key values togashi writes him to have specifically in his relationship with komugi

togashi is has written lust before (leorio trick tower, hisoka...all the time...etc.) , so why doesn't he include that here in the ant arc, something already filled to the brim with a sort of psychosexual horror? i think its a fundamental exclusion to learning about women as people.

(also. how fucking lame that would it be if meruem was just horny instead of being down horrendous)

this near godlike creature is born to kill everyone who tells him no, doesnt see anyone as equals, sees human beings as objects/subjects (contradictory). QUICKLY he switches up when he meets komugi, who he values as an EQUAL because she humbles his ass.

okay, yeah. he does try to kill her. but why? because shes a woman? because shes disabled? because she told him no?

its because shes better than him and he knows it!!!!!

AND THEN all thoughts of killing her are squashed when he understands what her being in danger actually looks like and how that makes him feel. He realizes he doesnt want to live in a world where she and other people like her are not protected! When he realizes he owes her an apology he rips off his own fuckin . ARM. for her!!!!

and i am well aware it is bare minimum to say that he understands she is a person with thoughts, a personality, and feelings, but him asking her name, and Pouf was shocked he even bothered to learn it?!!!! because understanding her as someone who is just as complex as he is is the first fuckin step.

anyway

[patheticmull3rr]

Teory📔📘; When Blue Meets Yellow In The West

I have been replaying the Third Season for a few days now, and the most iconic phrase within it; "when blue and yellow meet in the west" has made me very curious.

In ST these tones are used to symbolize how couples (both in a friendly and loving context) begin to know or "find" such tones we find in scenes such as

The photos of Eleven and Max;

and on the tiles of the bathrooms where Steve and Robin were;

Just as these tones are found in different scenes used in contexts with couples that were previously presented to us. But what matters here is that this phrase is present in moments prior to which two specific characters are about to share important moments between them.

And ow this symbolizes personal growth for both people.

In the case of Eleven and Max, Max makes Eleven learn that her individual life is much more than what Hopper or Mike tell her, and that there are more better things in the world than "stupid boys."

Teaches her to be herself, and at the same time Max becomes Eleven's first best friend, which is important for both of them even later in the S4. Max provokes in Eleven a feeling of independence and empowerment.

Which she later uses to end her relationship with Mike after he lied to her (I'll talk about that specific scene in another blog).

Also!!: I would like to honor the detail that Max has the green during this specific scene that shows Eleven the Wonder Woman comics, which in simpler words symbolizes the fact that Max already has the blue and yellow in she

Moving on to the Robin and Steve scene, specifically Robin is a character that is used to be related to Steve for the same reason as Eleven and Max.

Of course, each scene is different, but if we realize, in both contexts they have a similar problem, which is love problems.

In the bathroom scene where Robin and Steve talk, Steve begins to give Robin some hints that show that he is romantically attracted to her.

She ends up rejecting him by coming out to him as a lesbian woman, but even so she does not act offended by this, but rather a friendship arises directly between them. something that Steve also needs, realizing that there is more to the world than just wanting to get a girlfriend, and that he still has a lot of internal development ahead of him.

(I will also analyze this scene in another blog)

Taking into account the scenes that we have just rescued where yellow and blue are predominant in both couples, yellow and blue are not as such couple tones, as in the case of Mike and Eleven.

Something that is even somewhat difficult to find using these shades while the two are together, not counting the covers, and also the moments like this one that I have marked.

Taking the fact that explains that in the context of "when yellow meets blue in the west" symbolizing that they are important colors that are taken for important moments and where there is an individual advancement in both people being united.

Why then does the original couple, who are supposed to have yellow and blue predominating in them, not move forward together?

The answer is simple: They do not advance in the way that is expected when being together.

Let's take for example a dialogue that was supposed to be important for both of them, the scene in which they were trying to heal Eleven's injured leg after training against the MindFlayer.

During this scene we are presented with Mike trying to talk to Eleven, as Lucas had repeatedly told him earlier in the episodes after she finished him off.

We can see that during these dialogues, Mike tries to talk to Eleven more directly about how he feels about her, the simple act of apologizing, telling her that he was an idiot for lying to her, or perhaps a simple "I love you, forgive me for not telling you the truth" but while he tries he only manages to stumble over his words and confuse Eleven, not knowing what he was referring to, not understanding Mike's hints in his words and the way in which he himself was trying to tell them.

And can even take into account that before telling him something important he is interrupted by the walkie talkie.

So why didn't Mike just try to tell Eleven directly what he had screamed moments before she got hurt?

It's simple, both had already found their yellow and blue moments before, both realized different things, which later causes their development to begin to fall behind, because they both (specially Eleven) don't need that.

and that's why in this scene, after talking to Eleven about being in contact with her, he acts so confused after she brings up what he had said earlier, and Mike just says he doesn't remember.

That is why when she kisses him and tells him that she loves him, he acts confused, his simple gestures are as if he did not expect that to happen, because he was thinking of saying something very different to Eleven during the failed dialogue they had.

But now, let's see about the yellow one that Mike found when Eleven was not with him.

In which he even had the green with him during that specific scene that I would like to discuss.

Taking into account this specific scene we can realize that it is the complete opposite of how he is expected to behave with Mike, when Eleven tells him that they broke up, Mike does nothing but get upset and go home being angry as hell. same way, but when he has this argument with Will during the pressure of the moment, he simply makes the decision to go after him, knock on his door until he gets tired and tell him that he had been a complete idiot, that he wanted to talk things over with him and without letting him to shout his name and knock on his door.

At the same time, we can take into account that both scenes are totally different, in the scene where Eleven ends up with Mike, there is a big sun, a lot of people, a relaxed atmosphere, but when Mike argues with Will, everything becomes sad, there is no sun, it's raining.

And both end up with emotions twice as strong as they were before.

We can take this as the fact that Eleven had already found her blue, and she felt complete because of it, she didn't need Mike. But in Mike's case everything got even sadder because he still didn't get his yellow, and he felt like he was losing him.

In the case of Robin and Steve, they did not have yellow and blue in their clothes, but there was in their surroundings. I would like to use it in this context to show that although we already gave a more psychological meaning to yellow and blue, the phrase, taken literally can represents a sunset.

and we not only see this in the scene we took, but also in the scene from the season before this one, "crazy together."

and in another scene later, the scene after the fourth season ended

Specifically, I use this because it is an allegory to what I am trying to communicate with this, they are both sitting together, and the sun is touching them both.

At the same time, if I remember correctly, several of the most important scenes in the context of Mike and Will have been after "yellow and blue meet."

I know what you may be wondering, if I'm using the phrase for a more friendly context when putting friendly couples, why specifically Mike and Will don't I put them there too?.

It's simple, because they have already passed that phase, and their relationship has been growing over time, in a more personal and even deeper way even if they were not together, and because the phrase is not only used for friendly couples.

and, no, yellow and blue does not represent Mike and Eleven's relationship, because we can see that after several important moments during Eleven's individual development, she stops using yellow or blue, even during season four she begins to use the blue.

They make it clear to us that Eleven does not need a yellow or a blue to be able to move forward, because if the previous development she had with Max left her.

Is that she can be her own blue and yellow, even another different tone or the one that she wants to use.

For that same reason during the scene where Mike and Will meet after fighting, Mike wears green, hoping that Will could see that he would be both shades for both of them, but, at the end of the day, they would end up completely matching each other.

That's the same reason why, in previous seasons and even episodes within that season, they both continue to use them individually, and have so many important moments together.

Thanks so much for reading. 💛💙

[stardustdiiving]

One major thing about any hypothetical Ei and Wanderer reconciliation scenario to me is the fact Wanderer refers to her as his mother many times but Ei never once is shown referring to him as her son—or any indication she sees him as family at all

I think this would make any reconciling more messy in a way I find interesting: I really feel you’d have to sit Ei down and basically explain to her why Wanderer has mommy issues. You have the fact she sort of views her “letting Kabukimono go” action as something done on his behalf/a neutral well intentioned action with no malice, but I honestly think Ei might have an easier time understanding how that could be perceived as abandonment than she would understanding it being like, specifically parental/familial abandonment

In a way I think is a consistent trait in her character I feel Ei has spent a long time struggling to really consider other people’s emotions, wants and needs + if she has any sort of responsibility for them when she makes decisions, with a lot of this coming from how she struggles to consider her own humanity and emotions. To me it’s the same sort of logic she decides it’s for the best she just leaves Kabukimono somewhere once it’s clear he can’t fulfill the purpose she made him for that drives her deciding to just let the Shogun run amok on taking people’s Visions—she has good intentions with both but doesn’t really seem to consider that other people might have emotional reactions to her actions—even post her second SQ we see her be genuinely confused why one of her citizens was scared of her and thought she would attack him for beating her in a card game

So with Wanderer…after the fact she’s clearly trying to be better about change and not closing herself off from the world post AQ, I think I can see her coming to ne sympathetic about how he may have been hurt by her actions and seen it as abandonment. But I really think the familial dynamic aspect of it would really confuse her and I think her struggle to be on the same page as Wanderer there would make it hard for him to feel really satisfied with anything. I really think you’d have to have like a third party come in and be the one to explain why Wanderer views her as a mother because i feel if Wanderer had to be the one to do this it would be unbearable for him emotionally ejjchfnfj

Which is so tragic especially if you consider Ei as someone who does care a lot about family via like, going off her relationship with Makoto. She understands it but I think has a very inhuman idea of it and I think would struggle to stomache or conceptualize creating More family after Makoto’s death for a while…it’s something she’d have to work up to. JJSNXJX. I can see Ei feeling she owes Wanderer something and trying to adhere to what she understands of Wanderer’s perception of their dynamic but Wanderer finds it really awkward and can tell she doesn’t get it and it’s honestly fine because it’s not like he really wants her as his mother at this point in his life

I just really like the idea it’s never really going to work out fully because of this gap in how they both perceive relationships and each other dynamic wise. Ei who doesn’t see Wanderer as family in a way that makes Wanderer realize she’s never really going to fully get it even if she does feel remorse and apologizes but is kind of just over it and thinks it’s more comfortable for both of them if they just don’t force their dynamic to be anything significant

[avelera]

Mostly buried this in the tags of my next OFMD meta reblog down from this post but…. I don’t think Ed is going to apologize for his Kraken era and I don’t think the narrative is going to demand that he does.

I saw a couple posts expressing eagerness for Ed’s inevitable “apology tour” after he wakes up and I just fundamentally don’t think that’s going to happen. I could easily be wrong. But at most I think we might get a few mumbled, shamefaced apologies. If you expect him to grovel before Lucius and the crew, imo, that’s just not going to happen and here’s why:

- the narrative morality of OFMD has NEVER been encouraging its characters to become “good” people. The story is about finding love and acceptance during a midlife crisis. It’s about following your bliss. The highest moral demand it makes of its characters is to be true to themselves, not to become Good People. It’s a pirate comedy. It doesn’t care about murder. It cares about being true to yourself and your desire to be a pirate. Everything goes well when people follow their bliss. It falls apart when narrative defining main characters like Stede or Ed do what they think they should do instead of what makes them happy.

- Emotional pain has always been more important, more impactful, than physical pain in the show. Ed’s bad behavior (to put it lightly) was an expression of his emotional pain. Simply put, the narrative isn’t going to ask him to apologize for his emotional pain.

- Stede, the main driver of the narrative, DOES apologize because his actions led to Ed’s emotional pain (in his mind) and again, narrative pain is weighted more than physical pain in this show. Also, life is cheap, if you’re not a main character. This is still a pirate story. Murder is not treated as a sin.

- Ed is proud. Taika is proud. Both rightfully so one would argue, they’ve accomplished a great deal. Ed’s got a bit of Taika in that, actually more than a bit. It’s clear Taika puts a lot of himself into Ed. My gut tells me that Ed/Taika is just not going to grovel an apology. That’s just not his style. Mumbled self-conscious apologies because he feels he should is one thing. But deep sincere apology tours? Not gonna happen. He won’t abase himself like that (Ed OR Taika)

- The person he arguably hurt most directly, Izzy, hurt Ed IMMENSELY at the end of S1. Arguably more than Lucius, the majority of whose pain came from what happened after he was pushed overboard. But Izzy Ed personally tortured, and he did it because Izzy threatened to murder Ed if Ed didn’t climb back into the suffocating closet of Izzy’s expectations for him. Ed is not going to apologize to Izzy. Izzy got exactly what he deserved in physical pain after the emotional pain he dealt Ed, narratively speaking.

- I’m not talking real world morals, to be clear. Or even what the various Izzy or Ed fans THINK the other deserves, where the fans think the fault truly lies and who owes what to whom.

- What I’m saying is, in the OFMD world where emotional pain matters more than physical maiming, the narrative isn’t going to ASK Ed to apologize to Izzy for maiming him after what Izzy did at the end of S1 and Izzy getting his comeuppance for it. And that’s because they hurt each other equally, emotionally. They’re even now. Izzy lashed out and emotionally destroyed Ed during a vulnerable moment. Ed took his leg. They’re done. The way forward is for them to separate and get their toxicity out of each others life or find a new way forward with new understanding of each other as they become entirely new people after their respective ordeals. But as far as the pain they’ve dealt each other, there’s no debt. They’ve both hurt each other beyond the point of apology being anything but a false display.

Again, I could be totally wrong. Joke’s on me if ep. 4 opens with Ed on his knees crying and apologizing to everyone he hurt. But I just cannot picture that happening. And I don’t think OFMD is the kind of story that will demand it.

[snowyquokka]

SECRET SECRET

K. SEUNGMIN

chapter 1

cw: swearing, fem reader, academic rivals, angst if you squint, both like each other but wont admit it

wc: 1.2k

a.n - welcome to my first full fic !! im super excited to share this and im actually really proud of it. happy reading <3

✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧

You’re sitting at your usual spot in the library on your college campus when a book is slammed down on your table, ripping a yelp from your chest as you practically jump out of your skin. You look up to see a smug grin splayed on full, pale pink lips.

Brown eyes sparkle back at you mischievously and before he even opens his mouth, you just know he’s going to say something to purposely aggravate you.

“I don’t want to know, nor do I care.” you grumble before turning back to your book.

“Where the Crawdads Sing.” Seungmin hums, “Didn’t know you had taste,” You ignore him and turn the page.

He huffs and plops down in the seat next to you, his knee brushing against yours as he does.

You snap your head up and admit defeat, placing a bookmark where you left off.

“Since you so rudely interrupted me,”

He rolls his eyes in response to your complaint, “Here we go again,”

“Don’t give me that.” you snap, “You came over here unannounced while I was clearly doing something. So tell me, what is it that you want to brag about now? Hm? Perfect score on the English essay? No wait- I know, you’ve finally succeeded in ass kissing every professor in the building.”

The entire time you were ranting, Seungmin sat with his chin in his palm, face angled towards you. His grin never faltered, which in turn only pissed you off more.

You snap your book shut and move to stand before you feel a hand tug on your sleeve, forcing you to sit.

“I didn’t come over here to brag,” Seungmin readjusts in his chair so his knees are poking the side of your bare thigh, the sudden contact sending warmth throughout you.

“I was hoping we could- I don’t know. Maybe we could be at least civil with each other?.”

Your eyebrows shoot up and your eyes widen.

“C-Civil?” you sputter while searching his face for any trace of ulterior motives.

He nods and fidgets a little. That’s when you realize that he’s nervous.

Seungmin is anything but nervous when it comes to talking to you. He’s always confident while spewing whatever insults he can think of on the spot.

“I uhm- I think I owe you an apology.”

“Excuse me?” That’s not what you meant to say.

Though, you’re fairly certain that whatever you were going to say would’ve come out ten times worse.

“Yeah.” he winces, “Fuck- you know I’m bad at this kind of stuff,” Seungmin huffs and runs a hand through his blonde hair.

“I’m sorry for being a dick,” his broad shoulders deflate and he looks like a weight was literally lifted off of him.

“You’re sorry?”

“Will you stop repeating me?” he scowls.

You can’t help but giggle a little, he couldn’t last two minutes into an apology without looking or sounding annoyed.

“‘M sorry. I just,” you bite your lip to stifle another laugh, “I didn’t think I’d live to see the day that Kim Seungmin apologized for- well, anything.”

He grumbles something incoherently and pushes his knee farther into your thigh. You swallow hard and look behind him at the now very interesting bookshelf.

Seungmin sighs and gets up without another word and leaves. You watch as he rounds the corner and slips through the door.

“What the hell just happened,” you blink and whisper to yourself.

After his sudden apology, Seungmin has avoided you for an entire week now. He won’t even spare you a glance. You’re complaining about it to your best friend, Hyunjin, who also happens to be close with Seungmin.

Small world.

“Look, I don’t know exactly what happened but, like, could you maybe talk to him about it? He’s been killing the mood lately.” Hyunjin brings his iced americano to his lips while you form a bewildered expression.

“Me? You want me to talk to him?” you scoff and lean back in your chair, “Why should I have to? He apologized, I listened. End. Of. Story.”

“Why are you always so stubborn,” Hyunjin rolls his eyes, placing his coffee on the table.

“Ridiculous. Absolutely fucking ridiculous.” you huff and pinch the bridge of your nose. Hyunjin gives you an ‘are you serious’ look.

“If I let you put his number in my phone, will you shut up about it?” He grins and holds out his hand for you to give your phone to him. “And you’re buying me another coffee.”

[You] - cheer up

[Intellectual Demon] - who is this?

[You] - jinnie said that you’ve been a real downer since apologizing to me

[Intellectual Demon] - it’s not even that bad

[You] - i can feel the frown radiating off of you rn

[You] - it’s your aura.

Seungmin smiles to himself proudly. After all, it was his idea to get Hyunjin to give you his number.

Now all he has to do is convince you to meet with him. He’s got it all mapped out; you’ll meet with him at his place, he’ll confess, you’ll reciprocate his feelings and you live happily ever after.

The guy gets the girl, like he always does. It’s a simple, foolproof plan.

Right?

“Yeah, no thanks. I’m good.”

Wrong.

Seungmin was so wrong. Immediately after you pick up the phone he’s already hit with a groan and a ‘what do you want now?’ Nonetheless, he pushed through and asked you to go to his place. You declined, which shouldn’t have surprised him, but it does. Seungmin thought that if he apologized all would be forgiven and you would be more willing to speak to him.

Though, he can only blame himself. He fell-and crashed- first, hard. Instead of admitting his feelings to you, and himself, he tried his hardest to distance himself from you, making you find him unbearable to be around. It worked, of course.

Seungmin wishes it didn’t. He wishes he would’ve just grown a pair and told you. He wishes he didn’t feel so unlovable.

You, on the other hand, have attempted to make your attraction obvious. Someone can only take so much rejection, however. You stopped flirting, stopped even looking in his direction at one point. Seungmin made it crystal clear that he wanted nothing to do with you, and now that he’s apologized you can’t help but catch those feelings all over again.

“Please, just- what do I need to do for you to come here?” Seungmin’s voice echoes through your head, bouncing off the sides as you feel yourself slowly start to give in.

You seriously should stop being a pushover.

“Send me your address, I’ll be there soon.” There’s a pause at the end of the line when Seungmin mutes himself and screams into his pillow.

tags: @godslino @skzstarnet @anakin-sweetheart

dividers: @chaeneuu

[tinytinyblogs]

Can you write something about Yandere Bang Chan?

Home

Home is supposed to be a place where you feel safe, but not when he is there with you.

⚠Yandere theme⚠

Stray kids masterlist here

💌Hi, thank you for your request. I'm sorry it took a while for me to respond. My brain hasn't been working very well lately, so I hope this story is okay. If it's not, I apologize.

Tears silently stream down your cheeks, your red face flushed from trying so hard to hold back your sobs. The cold floor beneath you and the night breeze wafting in from the nearby window seep into your body, making you shiver. "Home?" His deep voice breaks the silence, his words sending a chill down your spine. The huge room where you and Chan are trapped feels like a suffocating prison, the air thick and heavy. It's hard to breathe and move, as if you're chained in place. The clock ticks loudly in the otherwise silent room, adding to the sense of chaos and unease. Your life is in turmoil, and you feel completely out of control.

He rules everything, especially your life, and you have no choice but to submit. You've told him you hate him, you want to go home, and you don't love him like he does, but those words only serve to anger him further. Your body is covered in wounds, and his face is twisted with anger. "Don't be stupid, Y/N," he says. Is this really love? He keeps bombarding you with the word love but his love tastes like poison. To Chan, you're just too stupid to understand. He's delusional, to the point of insanity. In his own little world, you're the main character, and he's dedicated his life to you.

He believes what he wants to believe, and he believes that you will love him as much as he loves you. He thinks you're just too shy to admit the truth. How dare you want to leave him? Don't you see how hard he works to be with you, to possess you? Don't you know how many people he's eliminated, how he watches your every move? And yet you still say you hate him? No one in the world could love you as much as he does. He places his hand on your chin and lifts your face to meet his eyes, ensuring that you have no choice but to look at him. "This is your home, Y/N," he says. "Our home. You don't need to go anywhere."

You thought you were living your best life, but in a blink of an eye, everything changed. Now, all you can see is him and his sinister smile, greeting you like you're the perfect couple, even though you don't really know him at all. You cannot describe the feeling of fear that coursed through your veins at his touch. The flower path he had given you felt like a prison, and you felt like you were walking on broken glass. You knew you shouldn't give in to him, you shouldn't listen to whatever he had to say, but you had no choice.

His power was too much for you to resist, and you were forced to remain silent and listen to his every word. Chan hates the idea of hurting you, because you are his precious diamond. But he believes you need to learn the truth. He needs to show you who you need the most in the world—only him, and no one else. "You will love me," he says. Call him crazy or insane if you want, but who do you think made him this way? It was you, from the moment he first saw you. His heart screamed that he needed to be with you, no matter what. From day one, you have been his, even though you have made it difficult for him by not letting anyone else get close to you. "No," he says.

"You should love me as much as I love you." Your mind is blank, your mouth is too heavy to speak, and you are too weak to move away from him. "No one could love me as much as I do, Y/N," he says. The thought of being trapped with him for the rest of your life makes you want to scream. What kind of monster is he, and why do you have to face him? Why you? Chan sees you as different. No one else in the world is as interesting to him as you are, and you have captured his attention. He believes that you owe him something for this. "No one." You could hear the rain falling outside, its sound filling your ears.

You kept your whole attention on Chan, just as he wanted. "You don't need anybody else," he said. But how could his voice still be so clear to you, even though he didn't raise it above the sound of the rain, which was getting heavier and heavier? "No, I'll never let anyone steal you from me." Chan feels like he's on top of the world with you by his side. This moment is one he'll cherish forever. He's won the game he created, and you're the loser. He has all the power and has destroyed the wall of freedom you once had. Nothing could be better than knowing he'll have you by his side forever, to spend his life with you doing all the things lovers do.

"You're mine," he says. "Remember that." His heart pounded so loudly in his chest that he wondered if you could hear it. Your own heart raced as well, but not because of happiness. You hated this moment, and you were terrified of the man in front of you. he doesn't care what you feel right now. He touches you, he kisses you, he hugs you, whispering words of love in your ear. He doesn't care if you believe him because happiness hitting him like a truck and he flying like there is no gravity. "Got it right?" He smiled his anger melted away, replaced by a goofy smile as he thought about you and your future together, the kind of smile that made people think he was kind-hearted, sweet, and angelic. But he wasn't.

He was far from it. The real Chan was a devil in angel's clothing. "Give me a word, Y/N." Closing your eyes, you nodded your head aggressively, surrendering all that you should have had in life to him. Chan glares at your wounds, believing that they are enough to make you submit to his will. He is convinced that you will fall for him, even though you have told him that you hate him. You are on the edge of a cliff, and Chan is poised to push you off into the abyss, into his perfect life. He is determined to have you, no matter what the cost. You crawled to him, just as he had instructed. The headache pounded in your temples, but you didn't speak a word. Your nod was enough for him. He understood perfectly and was beyond satisfied with your response.

[imabeautifulbutterfly]

Congratulations Mimi on your 700 followers 🥳🥳🥳🥳!!! THAT IS AMAZING!

For your prompts, would either of these spark your fancy?

"I've always dreamed of watching a sunset like this." For Cody!

And/or

"Where will you go now that the war is over?" For Wolffe!

💙

Ahhh my lovely! Thank you so much @ulchabhangorm for submitting such awesome requests.

I apologize for the delay, my keyboard decided to die on me yesterday, so I had to wait for the delivery today. I hope you love these two stories for you. I'll be posting them separately.

I hope you love them.

Love oo,

Sunset

Warning: sand, annoyance, friendly banter, slight flirting, guilt, seeking forgiveness, rumours, slight touching, voyeur, I think that's all the warnings. If I miss any please let me know.

Main Master List   |   AO3 Link | Quote Roulette

Whether it was the heat, the sand, or maybe it was the aches from old wounds you suffered throughout your less than glorious career as a salvager, but everything in your body was screaming at you to stop and making walking that much harder. Your feet felt as though they were being dragged through sand. You stopped walking and looked down at the sand surrounding your feet. Right. You were walking through sand, it felt like you’d been walking through it for a millennia, and you’d be beyond happy if you never see another rock, bramble, or desert, beach, anything containing sand for a long long time. 

God, how could there be so much sand, you shifted your clothes, feeling the little grains in between your clothes. 

“Don’t fall behind.”

You glanced up to look at Cody, glaring at your relatively new companion, “Does it look like I’m falling behind?” You asked exhausted, annoyed, and at the end of your tether.

“Yes. Hence why I said, don’t fall behind.” He chuckled as he started walking again, shaking his head. When he went awol from the Empire, the last thing he ever expected was to be found floating adrift, in the ship he had absconded with; and regardless of how much effort he put into fixing the derelict spacecraft nothing helped. The hyperdrive was damaged beyond repair, and if it hadn’t been for you showing up, trying to salvage what you could, he would’ve been dead now. For that alone he would be eternally grateful.

A sigh escaped your lips as you kept trudging behind him, “You know the only reason I’m here is because you owe me for saving your life, and you said you needed to find your friend, and once you found your friend you’d be able to pay me back. However, in all that fancy talk, not once did you mention anything about trudging through this gods-forsaken wasteland of a planet. Which is not my idea of you paying me back.”

He let out a laugh, as he stopped and turned to look at you, “Cyar’ika, you know I’m good for it. I promise, I will pay you back, and I will even try and help you find your brother.”

You let out another sigh of resignation, “Fine, whatever. I’ll choose to believe in you.”

“There’s the spirit.”

“Who are you looking for anyway? I mean I know you said a friend, but if your friend is all the way out in the recesses of human cohabitation maybe they don’t want to be found. Ever thought of that?”

Cody just hummed. Truth was that ever since he heard the rumour that Obi-wan might be alive, all he wanted, no, all he needed was to find out if that was true. He needed to know he hadn’t killed his General, the man he looked up to, the man who … opened his eyes to a world he never expected. 

“I have cyar’ika and honestly …” he stood on the ridge of the dune, the Jundland Wastes of Tatooine laying there before him, “it scares me to know that he might not want to see me. Things … didn’t end well between us, the last time we saw each other.”

You stood beside him as you looked out at the wasteland, “What happened?”

“I tried to kill him.”

Silence filled the air between the both of you, shock and surprise radiating off you, “Oh.”

“I wasn’t in my right mind … doesn’t excuse what I did, regardless.”

“So you’re … hoping for what? Forgiveness?”

“Maybe. Or maybe I’m just hoping that we can eventually make it back to just being friends. He was like a brother to me. Clones take brotherhood very seriously, and I betrayed his trust.”

“But you said you weren’t in your right mind.”

“Doesn’t change the fact I gave the order to fire.”

Your eyes took in Cody’s countenance, he looked apprehensive, his hands were balled into fists, his shoulder was squared off, everything about him screamed he was either getting ready to fight or he was scared. You slowly reached over and held his hand, moving his fingers away from the tightened fist. 

He glanced down as he felt your fingers loosening his, he couldn’t help smile as his eyes slowly met yours. It was a simple gesture, and that meant more to him than anything he’d ever experienced before. 

“If he is as good a friend as you say he was, and he viewed you as a brother too, it might take some time, but I’m sure he’ll forgive you eventually.”

“I hope you’re right, cyar’ika.”

You couldn’t help the smile that appeared on your lips, “You will have to tell me what that means eventually.”

“No, I don’t.”

“Mmm, yeah, you do. Especially if you want to keep flying in my ship,” you laughed, your smile slowly fading. “Is that why you didn’t want to fly the ship out here, afraid he’d hear the engines and go into hiding?”

“Yeah.”

You gave a slight nod in understanding, at least you were able to leave your ship with someone you trusted. If only your speeders actually lasted for the whole trip, your legs wouldn’t have been feeling like they were about to fall off. 

“What do you think? Camp for the night here, and then make our way into the labyrinth of the Jundland Wastes? Or should we just try and see what we can find before night falls?”

“No, let’s camp …” he pulled out his binocs and searched the area, he pointed to an elevated rock face, the ridge line looked flat enough, “that should work, and provide us with an unobstructed view.”

“Alright,” you nodded, “lead on.” You adjusted your pack, pulling your hand away from his, following him to the campsite.

It wasn’t long before you both had set up your camp, you were finishing up the stew you were making for dinner, when your eyes fell on Cody, sitting on the edge of the cliff, his feet dangling over the edge. You passed him a bowl as you sat beside him, “What are you thinking?”

Cody smiled as he looked at you, he reached up and gently wiped away some dust and dirt from your hike, “I’ve always dreamed of watching a sunset like this, but I never thought it would’ve been possible.” He focused back on the twin setting suns, “It’s beautiful.”

Your eyes simply focused on his face, and the smile he had on his lips, your heart clenched in your chest, your breath quickened, as you watched him enjoy his freedom, feeling so much in that moment. “Yeah, it is.” You whispered, focusing back on your stew, as you both sat in silence eating your dinner, as your knees touched.

Obi-wan watched the two of you from a distance, his thumb and forefinger stroking his beard. A small smile on his lips as he saw his Commander, his friend, his brother-in-arms, happy and not alone.

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[dueseaworthiness]

From the book Super Black: American Pop Culture and Black Superheroes by Adilifu Nama.

Now this is something that I think would have been very powerful to see in the MCU. Like, I feel that this was the conversation Falcon and the Winter Soldier WANTED to have. . .except Steve wasn't there (thanks, Endgame!)

We have Bucky as the "White Man Proxy", which doesn't hit the same way as the above interaction would have. While Bucky may be a white man, he is not thee white man at the center of the Captain America iconography. Steve is. Having Steve be the one to grapple with the fallout of passing on the shield to Sam would have (I think) been a very compelling story.

Bucky: When Steve told me what he was planning, I don't think either of us really understood what it felt like for a black man to be handed the shield. How could we? I owe you an apology.

This is something that the above comic page actually shows us. Steve puts his foot in his mouth twice, and Sam calls him out on it both times (that first time highlighting exactly how thoughtless Steve's words were). And I don't think it villianizes Steve; it just shows the audience that he has this blind spot when it comes to understanding racial dynamics.

I think, at his best characterization, Steve isn't necessarily "color blind". It's more like race or gender (or whatever other marginalized identity someone has) is trivial to him. He truly does judge a person by the content of their character. BUT— I think that creates this situation where Steve fails to see that, for others who ARE prejudice, it IS a big deal, and that informs their worldview and their choices. So while Steve not caring if someone is black, or a woman, or some other minority frees him from holding prejudice views and he can see them for the person they truly are inside, it also blinds him to the ways those people have to deal with people who are blinded by prejudice.

This is what creates tension by giving Sam the shield in the MCU. It's what Bucky is alluding to when he says neither of them really understood what it felt like for a black man to hold the shield. And it’s why people in AND out of universe get bent out of shape about Sam carrying the shield.

Steve understands that Sam is "a good man". Him being black is secondary. But for a prejudiced world, Sam's skin color is going to come first for a lot of folks. It shouldn’t, but it does.

[jesncin]

I'm not an immigrant to my country. I'm not part of a marginalized race or religion. But even to me it makes so much sense that Clark isn't immediately going around telling anyone just by knowing how quickly people turn and act so cruel for no reason. How horrible behavior doesn't even need an excuse, just a target. How even without the violence, people can grow... strange in ways I don't want to get into.

Of course Clark approached this Lois as he did. Of course Kal told her, this reporter, his name and origins. Of course she reciprocated. A "normal" Lois might not have even if she had something to do it with, but this one has had so many different experiences growing up big and small. Things that I know people would insist can be easily ignored. The put-downs, the look-overs, the snide remarks... Told she's too smart, too "dumb", too "needy", too "pushy", too "weird", too... too... much. Any Lois is brash and unapologetic. But...

Of course Kal-El and Lois Liando are being so understanding where a more "canon" Kal-El and Lois Lane might struggle. What is canon but stories already told and shaped by other times and points of view? This isn't something you have to alter to fit the demands of a boss or publisher, so you're free to let the characters breathe and truly be themselves as they've been cast here. Different but at the heart still who they are. They're able to see and think instead of acting rashly or use words as daggers. Able to be compassionate as much as possible instead of dramatic. To be kind in a cruel world.

I'm sorry that this went on a while but I've rewritten this so many times over the course of a week and this... is as short and as clear as I'm able to get it. I hope you have a good day.

Hi! Yeah I'm glad that even people outside of the experience can understand how Clark's superhero identity is a marginalized one (especially compared to other heroes). When the concept of "foreign"-ness is brought into the equation, people can be cruel. It's why I personally find takes where "people are mad at Clark for ~lying~ about not disclosing his identity" so distasteful.

There we go!! Yeah you get it!! Lois is still a jaded reporter, it's just that her jadedness now comes from a very specific history and experience. Superman still gives her hope, but now it's because she sees herself in his story. Superman still reaches out to Lois to tell his story, but now it's because he knows Lois would do the story justice as an immigrant writer. I was concerned that people would think Superman sharing his Kryptonian name would be "too soon" to do for the Private Interview event, but I'm glad that readers like you understand why he trusts Lois Liando with it. It's common for people of similar experiences/identities to open up to each other sooner than most- because they know that the other person gets it.

:) A thing I've been saying a lot to people lately is "you don't have to work for DC comics to make DC comics". Canon itself can be pretty nebulous, so why can't fanon (where there are no editors and ideally no gatekeepers) be any different? And just because it's fanon, doesn't mean it can't give you the same (if not more) feelings as canon does. It's probably because I rendered the Private Interview comic to a horrifyingly professional degree (lmao I'm putting that comics Masters degree to use) but I've gotten a weird amount of responses that assume my comic needs to justify itself with canon. When no fanon work owes anybody that. I'm glad readers like you get it, y'know!

Oh my, don't apologize for taking the time to write such kind words (for over a week??!)! I really appreciate it, thank you dearly!

[bleeding-star-heart]

These tags on a reblog of my Anders analysis are another problem I have with DA:2's writing

#god i have so many feelings about this#cuz i romanced anders my first playthrough#and i hated that our relationship did a 180 as soon as I was like#“im not gonna let you gaslight me into doing war crimes”#was it OOC?#i don't know#I can't say#I haven't studied anders as a character or taken the time to contemplate him enough to speak on it#but i just know it was such a turn off that i started a new game entirely EDIT: I have removed the word "gaslighting" from this meta owing to the fact that technically, Anders isn't gaslighting, because gaslighting is something different. Gaslighting being trying to make someone doubt their perception of reality, among other things. What Anders ACTUALLY does falls under emotional manipulation. I would say to the OP that yes, indeed, this is VERY "out of character", so to speak. Most definitely for JUSTICE, the spirit inhabiting Anders's body. But also for Anders as well. Think about it: emotionally manipulating one's romantic partner is an inherently unjust thing to do. It is not something two people who respect and love each other do. Yet the spirit of Justice is completely silent when it happens. A being that supposedly embodies nothing but Justice simply...allows his host to guilt his lover into doing something they disagree with. He does not protest or try to stop Anders from engaging in a truly toxic form of emotional manipulation. If written properly, Justice should immediately have called Anders out on this. Which should prompt either an apology from Anders or a long, seemingly one-man argument between the two. But that doesn't happen. In fact, Justice only shows up if you, as Anders's rival, manage to turn him AGAINST blowing up the Chantry. And then, only to railroad Anders back into the role of terrorist. This, combined with Justice's general lack of reaction to any injustice or violation of rights that DOESN'T have to do with mages, causes him to become little more than a cheap plot device. Now as to why I don't believe a properly written Anders would do it, either. Anders at this point in the story is a revolutionary, yes. He is passionate about his cause. But he is also MORE than that. And part of that 'more'-and also WHY he's a revolutionary-is that he was a victim of a controlling, emotionally manipulative institution. One that bombards people like him with all kinds of unhealthy messaging. Messages like: the outside world is guaranteed to hate you, your (unchangeable) nature is inherently wrong and sinful. As well as: you can't trust yourself at all, you are one bad day from being a monster, you need to let us control you for your own good. Anders probably saw more than one person like Keili-that girl in the Mage Origin who actively believes she's evil and prays to 'not be a mage'. He probably encountered a lot of mages with varying degrees of religiously based self-loathing. He probably had some himself. And he lived in the Ferelden Circle. He's also a person who not only left a toxic institution, but actively sees and complains about how toxic the institution is. People who've suffered from toxic environments/relationships and RECOGNIZE how toxic those environments/relationships were, tend to value healthy relationships/environments. They try and work on themselves to remove any lingering psychological effects of that toxicity. It is highly likely that Anders would NOT want to repeat the kind of emotional manipulation he and others were subjected to. While he might not agree with Hawke about methods, Anders would not believe guilt to be a good tactic because guilt is one of the very tactics the Chantry used on him! Guilt about being a target for demonic possession, guilt about what the magisters did, guilt about being a mage in general.

Guilting his partner into agreeing with him, is, essentially, him doing what the Chantry did to him. And if the writers had put any thought into his character, they would have realized that too. And thus, if they were smart, or and simply give the player the option to permanently decline the quest with no negative consequences. The other option is to lean into that, and purposefully make it a character flaw, that he's too blinded by trauma to see that. But the writers did NOT have the time to be able to successfully pull that off. Thus, yeah. They make Anders, who suffered from religious based emotional manipulation...into someone who emotionally manipulates his partners. Which is yet another thing done in the name of a less-than-stellar ending and plot beat. EDIT: I have removed the word "gaslighting" from my part of this meta owing to the fact that technically, Anders isn't gaslighting Hawke, because gaslighting is something different. Gaslighting being trying to make someone doubt their perception of reality, among other things. What Anders ACTUALLY does falls under emotional manipulation. Which I still don't believe a properly written Anders OR Justice would do, for the reasons stated above.

[juniperpyre]

Do you think it was more essential for James to develop a more binary way of thinking than the others? I imagine James growing up as Voldemort is coming into power and in family that’s known for radical beliefs may have influenced him. It is probably easier to develop a simpler view as a way of coping and understanding as a child. James hating the dark arts isn’t inherently bad because he is more vulnerable than the others to Voldemort - adding to the necessity and weakness of his worldview. Yet, James not recognizing that most things are not as easily categorized as Voldemort is dangerous.

I wouldn't say it's essential for James to have black and white thinking on a human level, but on a narrative level I think it's a great character trait. black and white thinking is an ideology of purity, which james, and his son, the protagonist of the series, are both fighting against.

I think you're arguing that James' position as a wealthy pure blood man who is growing up with a genocidal war looming makes his childhood intellectual resistance to pure blood supremacy aggressively rejecting anything associated with pure blood supremacy. this includes the Dark Arts and the conservative, reactionary pure blood/wizarding world culture. since he is being invited in he will not risk accidentally being charmed by the ideology.

I think this is logical. I'm sure his parents raised him with inclusive, compassionate values, and he is clearly a loyal, helpful, loving person to those he cares about. he takes a left turn in thinking he owes none of this compassion to people he categorizes as "bad", and I doubt he spends a lot of time questioning why he considers certain people bad and certain people good until his late teens. to him it is abundantly clear, and people are stupid or stubborn when they refuse to acknowledge the universal truth that, coincidentally, aligns with his own perspective.

*cough*this adds to his fixation on lily and severus*cough*

Another element to consider in James' black & white thinking is that he is categorized as "good" by his society. this means his perspective is in alignment with the dominant culture, since obviously he sees himself as good. the dominant culture, which he opposes, enforces this core belief. this is a complicated knot for anyone to undo, much less a child.

untangling the knot would require James to inspect his core beliefs and his own goodness. is there an itch in him, somewhere, that something in his morality is wrong? um, yes. I doubt his bullying actually aligns with the values his parents taught him, but it's very easy to ignore the itch you get when a core part of your identity is challenged.

I don't even think his core beliefs are disrupted or shattered when he does start to untangle the knot, like, James is right. pure blood supremacy is bad. it is okay to use violence in your resistance. taking the fight to the bigots is brave, and he, as a wealthy pure blood, trying to fight back against discrimination is good!

I see one of James' core identity traits is him as a protector. that comes across in his care for Remus, his home being where Sirius runs, his demands for Severus to apologize to Lily, his role in the Order, and, finally, in his self-sacrifice when he uses his life as an obstacle between Voldemort and Lily & Harry. so if actions he justified as being good because they're against baby Death Eaters and therefore protecting muggle born students, are actually bad (what he did to Severus in SWM was harmful) is he even a protector?

like, yes, he still is, no one is perfect, but having to ask that question is painful for him. I discuss Lily saying he's as bad as Severus here, but tl;dr James thinks because he's not using slurs he's "good" and therefore does not need to introspect. right? he has never laid awake at night wondering if he is just as bad as Snape. he never shoves down a feeling of wrongness when he and Sirius harass a student who is obviously less skilled than they. he is good, so what he does is good.

I think jkr stumbled on great character writing with the way she portrays James' morality. it would be better if we got more time, but I believe he represents a common kind of privileged person who, for all of their good intentions, has trouble unlearning the dominant cultural values. it's a very sharp portrayal of that kind of person, who is usually displayed as ignorant and silly.

not seeing more of James weakens this (because jkr can't follow thru with the og ideas presented bc to do so would critique liberalism in a possibly radical way). nonetheless, I really like how horrible he's allowed to be as a teenager. it is developmentally appropriate for teens to be egotistical and be black & white thinkers, as long as they're growing out of it.

I do want to note a positive of this: it takes a lot of James to stop believing in someone. he trusts his friends immensely and it would take a lot for him to give up on them. Lily is the same.

haha "than the others" and I've only discussed James. yes, I think the struggles of the other character's lives put them in constant grey areas, and none of the other characters have both family and society reinforce their inherent goodness in a way they agree with. this makes it way easier for James to develop black and white thinking than the rest of them.