#why do i just appear out of no where to talk about LIV AND MADDIE of all things 😭

[asleep-and-afraid]

i hate diggie

i hate him. for so many reasons.

in s2e24 champs-a-rooney, maddie is about to go out in the gym for the victory rally to celebrate her basketball team winning the state championship. shes in the locker room as the girls are individually announced to go out into the gym so that everyone can cheer for them. bc it’s a huge moment for everyone. maddie made the game winning shot and is the team captain of the team. she won mvp. liv rushes in to the locker room about two people before maddie has to go out into the gym and be celebrated and tells maddie that diggie is by the paulie statue and will not go to australia if maddie tells him to stay. maddie is shocked that diggie would do that for her and kinda wants to get back together too. liv says his PLANE leaves in 10 MINUTES!! and maddie has to go to diggie RIGHT NOW. so they do a switch-o-rooney so that maddie can go see diggie.

so with context: here’s one reason i hate diggie: this is maddie’s MOMENT!! to be celebrated by everyone because of how hard she and her team have worked for this! and yet here comes diggie- whisking her away during her big moment. i don’t CARE about love and i don’t CARE that he can’t control when his plane leaves. diggie didn’t think about how this is maddie’s moment, nooo, he thinks about himself and being with maddie. if he really cared about HER he would know that her being happy is more important than them being together. but he doesnt. this is especially clear during the whole “i choose diggie” moment near the end of the show.

throughout the series, we see this happen again and again. he puts being with maddie over maddie herself. i hate diggie!! i mean god damn that break up scene was awful. diggie was terrible. i don’t blame him for wanting to go to australia and see the world. i blame him for only thinking about how HE feels in that fight. and not even validating maddie’s feelings at all. maddie constantly has to CHOOSE diggie over things.

[axwalker]

Now and then 3: Crush

I’m participating in the Wacky Drabbles prompts. (Sorry for the delay! 😬 )

This week is prompt  #42: Let’s be honest with ourselves, we knew this was going to happen.  It will appear in bold in the text. 

I also used the prompt sent by @burnsoslow​ : High school AU - Drake x Lexie - childhood friends - 16. “my hands are really dry. sorry about that.”

Synopsis:   The story of Alexis’s and Drake’s friendship since they met when they were 10 years old until they become roommates after college. (AU)

MASTERLIST

Warning: No one under 18 should read my stories.  Mention of alcohol.

Pairing: Drake x ?, Alexis x ?

Disclaimer: All characters belong to Pixelberry

Permatag list (Drake x Mc): @mskaneko​ @pedudley​ @burnsoslow​ @ac27dj​

@twinkle-320​ @kimmiedoo5​ @marshmallowsandfire​ @loveellamae​ @lauzales​ @pug-bitch​ @debramcg1106​ @ravenpuff02​ 

Wacky Drabbles: @dcbbw​ @texaskitten30​ @bebepac​ @pedudley​ @bbrandy2002​ @katedrakeohd​ @sirbeepsalot​ @bobasheebaby​ @flutistbyday2020​ @soheila-1996​ @kingliam-rys​

2010

Fifteen years-old

Lexie took her tray and looked for her friends at the cafeteria. She spotted Drake and Liam at the end of the hall; they were eating their usual meal consisting in an extra-large hamburger with fries, an apple, a bag of Doritos and a chocolate pudding, each.

She sat next to Drake. “I don’t know how you guys do it. I love eating but that’s just disgusting.”

Liam and Drake shrugged and kept eating. After cleaning his plate, Liam leaned on his chair and asked casually, “are you coming to the Beaumonts tonight, Lexie?”

“To Max’s party? Of course,” she answered, before taking a bite of her grilled cheese sandwich.

Liam elbowed Drake, who coughed before speaking. “And that new girl, Olivia? Is she coming?”

Lexie smiled, looking at Liam. “You’re so damn obvious is actually sad, Li.” She giggled when she saw Liam turning crimson red. “Yes, she’s coming too, and I’ll be sure to slip one or two things about how amazing you are,” she added, winking.

Liam stretched his arms behind his head then clasped his hands behind his neck “Well, you don’t have to lie a lot.”

“I won’t be adding modest to the list, that’s for sure.” Lexie laughed, as she took a Dorito from Drake’s bag. She actually thought Liam would be good for Liv, he was kind and sweet and Olivia definitely needed someone like that in her life. “You’ll come too, right, Drake?”

Drake got distracted when he saw Katie coming into the cafeteria.

“Draake!” She turned her head and saw Katie sitting down and smiling at Drake. She sighed, annoyed. “Earth to Walker!”

“Yeah. I will,” he answered, distractedly.

“Cool, my mom will let me stay longer if you come. She’s such a hypocrite. She can’t shut up about feminism, but I still need a boy to go to a party.”

“Please, Lex. I beg you, spare us the feminist speech, we know it by heart,” Drake said, still exchanging looks with Katie.

Lexie stood up, exasperated. “Whatever. See you at 9:00.”

---------------------------------------------------------------

Drake was laying down in Lexie’s bed watching a football match as she tried different outfits.

“It’s already 10:00 p.m., Lex. You promised,” Drake said in a tired voice.

She poked her head out of her closet door. “I’m sorry! I’ll be ready in a sec.” Finally, she stood up in front of Drake with a black tank top, ripped jeans and her red Converse.

“Well?” Lexie asked.

“It looks comfortable,” Drake said, shrugging.

“That’s it?” Lexie asked, disappointed. She knew she was too skinny; all the other girls of her class were full of curves and she was still so fricking flat.

“Uhm, yeah? Being comfortable is important, right?” Drake didn’t understand why his best friend looked so pissed.

“Yeah, it’s what I need anyway.” Lex turned to look at Drake who was watching the match again. “I’m getting wasted tonight.”

Drake muted the TV and turned his head to her. “What do you mean?”

“I’m fifteen and I’ve never been drunk; I need to live, Drake!”

“You’re so dramatic. And, you can’t get drunk. Elena will kill me if I bring you back wasted.”

“First of all, I can come back by myself and second of all, she’ll never know.”

Drake shook his head. “Have you meet your mom? She knows everything.”

“God! You idolize her. She doesn’t know everything. Come one, Liv must be already waiting for us,” Lexie said looking at her watch.

Lexie, Drake and Liam joined Olivia who was waiting for them in front of the Beaumont’s house.

Olivia was wearing sneakers and a short green dress that highlighted her red hair. She looked angry.

“Finally, Alexis. I’ve been waiting here for ten minutes. I was about to leave”

“Lexie is always late. Next time try to arrive ten minutes after the time she told you, Liv,” Liam teased her.

Liv arched an eyebrow. “I don’t remember telling you to call me Liv. My name is Olivia, golden boy. If you don’t mind, I was talking to Alexis.”

Drake and Lexie exchanged a half-worried, half-amused look. Liam was the most popular guy at school, so, he wasn’t used to girls talking to him like that. He clearly didn’t mind because he was still smiling at the red head.

Max led them to his basement where his parents had practically installed a bar. They had music, drinks, a pool table and a foosball.

CeeLo Green’s ‘Fuck You’ was playing in Max’s Bose speakers. Alexis joined Max on the dancefloor. Drake watched them dance for a few seconds. He smiled at Lex; she was a great dancer. Suddenly, Drake saw Katie and Maddie Amaranth arriving to the party. He dried his sweaty palms on his jeans and went looking for something to drink. Liam and Olivia were still bickering, but they were dancing with each other. And Olivia seemed to be having fun.

Katie saw Drake going to the table with the drinks and followed him. “Hi, Drake.” She smiled coquettishly.

Drake blushed but smiled back. “Hi!” For a few painful seconds, he didn’t know what to add, so he said the first thing that popped into his head. “It’s a cool basement, right?” – It’s a cool basement??- He wanted to slap himself. What a fucking stupid thing to say.

Katie giggled. “You’re so funny. And you’re right, it is cool.”

Drake didn’t understand what was so funny about his comment, but he wasn’t going to question his luck.

One hour later, Lexie was dancing with Max when she saw Drake making out with Katie. “That was fast,” she said to Max nodding at the couch where they were, an unpleasant feeling in the pitch of her stomach.

“It was only a matter of time.” They witnessed Drake kiss Katie passionately. “Wow! They’re really into each other’s tonsils.” Max laughed.

Lexie grimaced. “Ugh! That’s disgusting, they should get a freaking room. Come on, Max, I want another beer.”

Around midnight, Drake looked for Alexis, she was nowhere to be seen and it was already past her curfew. Bastien wasn’t very strict, so he didn’t have one, but Elena was going to kill them both.

Finally, he saw her playing foosball with Max and Rashad.

“Drake!” She shrieked when she saw him. “I’m winning!”

Drake chuckled. “I see that you fulfilled your mission of getting drunk.”

“I’m not drunk I’m the soberestest person in this room! Howdareyou?” She sloshed beer all over them.

Drake took a paper towel and cleaned his shirt. “You’ll regret it tomorrow. You remember that day after Leo’s birthday when I spend the morning throwing up, right?”

She waved her fingers no. “But, see that direfent, I mean, different. ‘Cause you were like super drunk, and Imma like not.”

Drake laughed. “Yeah, my bad. You’re clearly the poster girl for abstinence. I think we should go, anyway, Lex. Elena will kill us.”

“You’re such a party pooper. What happened, Katie ditched you?”

Katie was behind Drake. She smiled affectedly, and answered, “no, I didn’t. Come on, Drake. Some of us are going to Maddie’s house. She has a pool.” Katie took his hand, but Drake didn’t move.

“Lex is completely wasted. I can’t leave her like this,” Drake said as he watched Lexie try to play foosball with a drunk Maxwell.

“She’s a big girl, Drake. She can take care of herself.” Katie placed her hand in his shoulder. “If you come, I promise, we’ll have fun,” Katie urged him.

-I’m going to fucking kill Lex tomorrow-. “I’m sorry, Katie, you have no idea how much. But I can’t leave Lex like this. Maybe I’ll see you tomorrow?” He asked.

Katie was a popular, pretty girl, there was no way she was going to lose Drake for Lexie O’Brien, that’d be humiliating. “No, it’s tonight or never, Drake. You have to choose, now.”

Drake shook his head, he wasn’t going to leave his best friend like that, so he answered, “Then is never. I’m sorry, Katie.”

She shoved him on her wait out and went to join Madeleine.

Lexie sat. “Drake everything is spinning. And the music is so loud,” she complained, holding her head between her hands.

He kneeled down. “I told you not to drink this much. I mean, let’s be honest with ourselves, we knew this was going to happen. You’re not used to alcohol.”

“I’m fine” She stood up and walked to the door but tripped with the stairs. Drake tried to catch her, but it was too late. She fell down.

“I twisted my ankle. Hell! It hurts,” she complained as she rubbed it.

Drake sighed deeply and turned to Max. “Can I take her to your dad’s study? Only while she sobers up.”

Maxwell nodded. “Go on, Drake. My parents are sleeping anyway. You can make some coffee in the kitchen.”

“Come on, Lex,” Drake told her. She put her arms around his shoulders and limped to the studio.

Drake helped Alexis sit. She took off her left Converse. “My ankle hurts, Drake. And this room spins too.”

He chuckled. “Yeah, I know, Lex. Everything will be spinning for a while. Let’s see if it’s not broken.” He rubbed her ankle checking for any fracture like coach Evans had taught him. “My hands are really dry. Sorry about that.”

Suddenly, Lexie was very aware that Drake was rubbing her leg. They played a lot of sports together, this wasn’t the first time he touched her, and yet this time it felt… different.

Drake shook his head. “Do you have pain in the bone or here?” He asked as he pressed in the soft part of the muscle.

“Ouch! You’re such a savage! Yes, the second time.”

“Me a savage? You could be more grateful, you know?” He asked, angrily.

“Why? Because you couldn’t leave for Maddie’s pool with Katie? She has slept with half the school, Leo Rys included. She must have like a hundred STDs. I probably saved your life”

Drake chortled. “Oh, I see; I should be thanking you.”

Lexie stayed silence for a few seconds. Then, emboldened by the alcohol she asked, “Is she a good kisser?”

Drake blushed but nodded. “Very good.”

She rubbed her head, it hurt. “I never kissed anyone like that.”

“The right guy is waiting for you, Lex. You’re too special to make out with just anyone,” Drake empathized.

She rubbed her eyes. “You say that because you’re my best friend, but we both know that if I was really too special, I would be dating someone,” she said with a small voice.

Drake looked at her with his big brown eyes. Lexie had never noticed how handsome Drake was. It was no wonder that half the girls at school wanted to date him.

Drake sat next to her. “You’re the coolest person I know. You’re smart and funny. I mean you’re also a gigantic pain in the ass.” He laughed when she playfully punched him in the arm. “but you’re amazing, Lex. You just need to be patient.” He put an arm around her, amicably. Lexie felt her heart race, as she never had before. His arm around her shoulders made her feel aflutter, and she noticed for the first time how good he smelled. She blushed.

Drake’s voice startled her. “I’ll go get you some coffee, so you can sober up.” He tousled her hair, and added smirking, “I knew you would be a sappy drunk, O’Brien.”

Lexie didn’t reply. For a few minutes, she stayed on the couch, shocked. She had a big problem, a huge crush on her best friend.

.

[msjr0119]

Cordonian Wags

Part 6 - Don’t go

In a world full of Professional footballers and their demanding wives- can their football team nicknamed the ‘Cordonian Apples’ succeed? An American female physiotherapist joins the club. Will this cause issues with the footballers wives?

*This series is based on The Royal Romance characters who belong to Pixelberry - AU Plot switch*

A shorter part- but the best is yet to come 😁😁😁

Tags: @annekebbphotography @burnsoslow @drakesensworld @ladyangel70 @kingliam2019 @bbrandy2002 @butindeed @bascmve01 @drakewalker04 @pedudley @captain-kingliamsqueen @duchessemersynwalker @insideamirage @of-course-i-went-to-hartfeld @kozabaji @texaskitten30 @ibldw-main @kimmiedoo5 @nikkis1983 @dangerouseggseagleartisan @gnatbrain @walker7519 @lodberg @cmestrella @hopefulmoonobject @addictedtodrakefanfic @angi15h @liamxs-world @rafasgirl23415 @notoriouscs @whenyourheartskipsabeat @jovialyouthmusic @nz1091 @yukinagato2012 @indiacater

******

“I need you both to take me to the airport. Please.”

Both the men shook their heads. Their eyes both filled with sorrow. They had only known her a few days and already felt like they had all failed her.

“Do you want me to stay with you at your flat? I don’t mean that in a pervy way. I am a nice person really. I know my boundaries, I just like to test the water but I know you’re out of my league.” Riley was shocked at his statement, not knowing at first if he was being sincere. The sparkle in his baby blues proved he was concerned for her. Maybe he isn’t as bad as he is perceived to be?

“Thank you, Leo. But I need to leave Cordonia for a bit. This is all my fault.”

“Why is it your fault? You only kissed Drake.” Liam said, Riley not knowing that he knew. Her face blushed.

“You kissed Walker?” Riley could see the hurt appear in his eyes. She found Leo an attractive man, but for some reason she didn’t feel anything in her heart pulling her towards him. Really she shouldn’t feel anything in her heart as all the men on the team are in relationships.

“Yeah Liv told me before she added you into the group text.. Riley don’t worry about Kiara, we can press charges. You have all of us on your side. She’s a nutcase along with Madeleine- no offence Leo.” Group text? Am I just gossip for everyone? She’s a nutcase- that’s an understatement.

“None taken! I totally agree. I wish I could divorce the bitch. But Riley don’t go.” Leo held her hands, his eyes pleading with her not to go. She felt like she needed to confess everything that happened between her and Drake before they found out from another source.

“I.... I didn’t just kiss him... so therefore I deserved what I got. But as far as Kiara is aware that’s all I did.”

“You slept with him? Man. He’s more sly than I thought.” Leo was in utter shock, he always believed that Drake was loyal.

“Enough about Drake, Kiara etc. Can you organise a taxi for me. Please. I couldn’t ask Maxwell he would persuade me to stay. Please Liam. You said if I needed anything to just ask.”

“Fine, okay.” Liam held his hands up in defeat, shaking his head they were losing this battle against the stubborn New Yorker.

“Li!”

Liam gestured Leo to ignore the matter. Riley was a mess- he didn’t want to upset her even more.

Riley was still shocked at Leo’s reactions since she met them at the stadium. He was honestly a good guy and she felt awful being a bitch towards him when she first met him.

The taxi arrived, they sat in silence. Riley every so often rubbed her ribs- due to the lingering excruciating pain, the two men noticed. Asking her if she was okay, she just responded by nodding. After a short drive they arrived at the airport. The two men hugged her, before she made her way into the airports entrance. The Rhys made her promise that she would return- Oh boys I’m not even going anywhere. She watched the taxi leave before removing her phone out of her leather jacket, noticing she had a new notification.

I’m here. I’ve landed. Where are you? X

Just arrived- meet me at the exit. I had to get someone to come with me to think that I was leaving. X

******

Savannah arrived home feeling exhausted, she was hoping that Bertrand had settled Bartie down. Walking into the lounge, she nearly jumped out of her skin seeing Drake.

“What the fuck Drake? Why are you here? Why are you sat in the dark?” Turning the light on, she didn’t want any more shocks.

“Sorry Sav. Bertrand insisted that I came back here.”

“Yes i did! You’re lying about something! You Drake Walker are not clumsy. Did she hurt you again?”

“Woah! What’s happened?”

“Drake insists that he lost his phone and fell down the stairs. Show her your bruises!”

“Drake... did Kiara do this? You’re matching your girlfriend.” Savannah softly touched her brother’s skin- he winced at every touch.

“What do you mean?” My girlfriend? I’m single. Well in my mind I am anyway.

“She beat up Riley at the champagne bar. Kiara announced that she was pregnant- please tell me it’s not yours! Then Riley and Madeleine were having an argument, maddy then exposed that you two kissed and Kiara beat her to a pulp.” Both men’s eyes widened.

“Bertrand take me to Riley please.”

“No Drake. Just let her sleep it off she was drunk, I don’t think she will want to see you anyway. She called herself a slag.” Drake held his head in his hands, feeling guilty that he had got an innocent person involved in his toxic relationship. Tears began to fall down his cheek. His heart was breaking at the thought of Riley being hurt.

“Sav please. I need to see her. I haven’t got a phone because Kiara smashed it up and then she did what she did to Riley to me. I need to know that Riley is okay.”

“She did what exactly Drake? Tell me the truth and the whole damn truth! Or I swear to god you won’t see Riley ever again- you need to tell me so I can help you.”

“It started over a year ago.. I was constantly pestering her, asking to try for a baby- I just wanted what you and Bertrand have. I loved her at that point. I kept asking her to marry me and she rejected me. Then the abuse started, emotionally - she called me names. She made me feel guilty for everything, telling me what I can and can’t do. Then it gradually turned physical. I didn’t want to tell anyone due to the stigma. I felt ashamed, at first I was in denial hoping it would get better. And who would believe me anyway?”

Drake began crying uncontrollably, feeling emotional but finally relieved that he could talk to someone about the hurt and pain he had suffered. He didn’t want to elaborate on what exactly happened, but having Savannah aware of what he went through was helping him- baby steps he thought. Savannah felt like she couldn’t breathe- both her and Bertrand began crying at Drakes confession. All this time her brother needed her and she wasn’t there for him. He concealed it that well that no one was aware, they were oblivious to the domestic abuse taking place on their doorstep.

“I felt that I had nobody to talk to. I just accepted it all. I tried to get her some counselling but it made her more angry. I let her walk all over me. I still do. I think that’s why I got injured last season because i couldn’t concentrate. I’m a Walker. I should be strong. I’m a failure.”

Sighing, he didn’t know if he could continue. Had he said to much? Had he said too little? Would Savannah want full details?

“Every time the lads asked me out, id make an excuse up because she would lecture me on my return. Every time she couldn’t attend I made excuses up for her, lied for her. I never cheated, not until Riley. She was my saviour. When I was with her I felt loved. I don’t know why? I feel weak. I feel useless. Dad would hate me for the man I’ve become.”

“Dad would never hate you Drake. He loved you. And he was so proud of us both. He would be disappointed that you was stuck in a relationship that you weren’t happy in. He would have wanted you to be happy. Would you have ever left Kiara if Riley didn’t come?”

“Honestly... I feel stuck. I don’t think I’ll ever be free of Kiara. I like Riley. I like her a lot Sav, she’s like a breath of fresh air. Her smile is hypnotising. She is beautiful. I know she’s still married, and her husband was one lucky son of a bitch to have her in his life. I want to have a future with Riley. But what would she see in me? She probably hates me now.” Lucky son of a bitch- oh Drake if only you knew... he did to Riley what Kiara has done to you.

“I saw how your eyes lit up when you spoke about Riley. I never saw that with Kiara. I wished you had come to me before Drake. I could have helped you, we could have pressed charges. I feel like such a shit sister. I just wish that you had opened up to someone. Trust me Kiara is a dead woman!” Savannah and Bertrand both hugged Drake, from now on they were going to support him and help get rid of Kiara once and for all.

*****

Liam and Leo snuck back into Liam’s house, hoping that Olivia didn’t notice them. They were both melancholy as if they were grieving. Liam poured them both a scotch, both thinking about the events of the day.

“I don’t think she’s gone you know.” Leo stood smirking, whilst pouring another scotch.

“Why? We saw her walk into the airport.”

“Li, I know she hasn’t gone. If she has feelings for Walker she wouldn’t just walk away even if his ex battered her. She has a job here. She can’t leave.”

“Where are you going?”

“I’m going to go to her flat. I’ll text Maxwell for the address. He’s that gormless he probably hasn’t noticed that she’s gone.”

*****

Riley felt an idiot wearing sunglasses inside, mainly it was to cover up the damage that Kiara had caused- but also to cover up her identity up in case someone from the team saw her. Her intention was never to leave. She just wanted space from everyone before the first match. If they had all thought that she had left, no one would consider going to her flat to check on her.

“Hey, babe.” Riley recognised the voice, and smiled for the first time that day.

“Oh good. Thank god you are here.” Riley fell into the persons embrace, and broke down crying.

“What happened to you?” Riley sighed, knowing that she was going to have to explain the situation she had got herself in.

“It’s a long story. I’m so glad you decided to come. I could use some company that I’m used to.”

“You know I love you. And I’d drop everything and anything to come and support you. You mean the world to me.”

“I love you too. Come on. Let’s get out of here.” Riley grabbed the persons hand, they entered the taxi that pulled up and headed towards Riley’s flat.

[seacafes]

disney channel is going downhill: a rant.

    Growing up in the early 2000s, I feel as though as a child, I witnessed the peak of Disney Channel entertainment. Hannah Montana, The Suite Life of Zack and Cody, and That’s So Raven were just a few of the wonderfully relatable and entertaining shows I watched as a kid.  The shows that Disney channel used to play tackled feminism, racism, body positivity, and had very diverse casts. The Disney Channel of the early 2000s sent some very positive messages to its young viewers long before we were old enough to understand how much we needed them. While a few newer kids shows may have some positive lessons or anecdotes in their episodes, the older shows seemed to more actively seek out opportunities to enlighten young audiences about what it means to be strong, well-rounded, and confident, no matter what their situation may be.

    Back then, we had “That’s So Raven”, that not only featured a black female lead who was as bold as she was hilarious, was also unafraid to tackle issues like body shaming and racism in ways that felt natural. Raven taught us that people come in all shapes, sizes, and colors, and that we’re all beautiful. This shows in Season 2 Episode 8 of the show, released in April 2004, where Raven is excited over a vision of herself modeling her own clothes for a fashion show, until the magazine that sponsors it photoshops someone else's body over hers. Her body has been altered, and she appears much thinner than she really is. She is upset that her own body was not used, and also that the head of the agency only believes that there is only one look for all models. The fashion show director didn’t want Raven to model because she thought she was “plus size.”, and that apparently wasn’t good enough. In the end Raven  stands up for herself and proves that it’s what’s on the inside that really counts, not the outside.

    The channel also had a similar episode on Season 2 Episode 34 of the show the Suite Life of Zack and Cody, released in March 2007, where London and Maddie get insulted by Francesca (one of London's rich friends) while trying on clothes for a fashion show that they would both be participating in and then, after taking what she said and looking at themselves in a mirror that distorts their images (which can be seen as a reference to body dysmorphic disorder), both London and Maddie decide that they need to handle their weight issues before participating in a fashion show. London vows to lose weight and Maddie decides she must eat more to avoid being underweight. After London starves herself to the point of dizziness, while doing continuous laps around the hotel lobby, and Maddie has eaten several fast food burgers in a single day, the two prepare for the show, though as a result of their extreme methods, they both mess up their chance on stage. Afterwards, they discover that even London’s “perfect friend” Francesca has been stuffing her bra. This causes the two girls to agree that they are perfect the way they are, because nobody's perfect, saying, ‘What were we thinking? We were starving and stuffing ourselves, and we didn’t even need to do it. We should just be happy with the way we look. Next time one of your snarky friends makes a comment, let’s remind ourselves that we are perfect just the way we are.”

    Along with tackling physical issues, Disney Channel had shows and movies with strong leading roles played by women like Kim Possible and Wendy Woo from "Wendy Woo Homecoming Warrior" that taught us that girls can be tough and powerful too. Lizzie McGuire was so feminist that "subtle" isn't even an appropriate adjective. The show regularly dealt with the pressures of gender stereotypes, while exploring exactly what it meant to be a young woman exploring her identity.. It had Alex Russo from Wizards of Waverly Place, a character full of confidence, smarts, and wit, who constantly surpassed the low expectations that society had set for her in the show. Her deep exploration of her identity could get pretty inspiring. Kim Possible taught some important feminist life lessons by teaching young women that it's totally cool to be a sassy overachiever, and you don’t have to be a man to be a hero.

    All of these shows show that even though things might not be so good right now, everything will be okay in the end. They taught us how to react in certain situations, and how to handle the really hard ones. I still think back to episodes from my childhood when I find myself in a situation similar to one that I saw in one of my beloved shows, and because of them, I know what to do to make everything okay, or at least easier.

    In the early 2000s, it felt as though disney were ahead of their time. Many people like to claim, and I agree, that 2010 was when everything began to go downhill. In Season 1 Episode 7 of the show Shake it Up released in December 2010, the two main character’s Rocky and CeCe attend a party, where they are serving food to the supermodel guests. While serving, a supermodel approaches them and says, “You are adorable! I could just eat you guys up. You know- if I ate.” And goes on to laugh with her entourage. Former Disney Star Demi Lovato, who had left her own show “Sonny With A Chance” to deal with her own struggles with an eating disorder, tweeted about the joke, “I find it really funny how a company can lose one of their actresses from the pressures of an eating disorder and yet still make joke about that very disease,” Demi noted at the time, referencing her own very public battle with the disease. She also asked, “What are we promoting here? #notfunnyATALL.” This episode was a sad thing to see, seeing as in the past, we had Raven Baxter, London Tipton, and Maddie Fitzpatrick teaching us that jokes like that were not okay. That same year, in Season 1 Episode 9 of So Random!, more eating disorder jokes were said. In one of the sketches, a girl has her boyfriend meeting her family for the first time. She tells them, “Angus only eats one full meal a week ask him why” to which Angus replies, “My agents always on me about looking my best. She says to me “Ang-y, if you eat too many carbs, you won’t get the jobs. And I said “I knooow”.” But that’s not all! In an episode of Dog with a Blog (which, yes, is about a talking dog who runs a blog), the mother says, “I've been bitten, scratched, mauled, and puked on. And only one of those was self inflicted." implying that she made herself throw up, making light of the eating disorder, bulimia. If you didn’t think it could get worse- you’re in for a surprise! In an episode of the show Jessie, a character in a Zebra costume can be seen running away from a zebra. The zebra ends up catching him, and one of the kids witnessing the attack calmly states, “dressed like that, you were asking for it.” Why was that comment needed on a children’s show, Disney? What message are you trying to portray there? That if you dress a certain way, you’re “asking for it”? I don’t think so.

    Nowadays, the shows are filled with fake jokes and contrived situations that no one can believe or relate to. The kids in the shows wear tons of makeup and layers upon layers of fancy clothes. Miley Stewart only wore lots of makeup when she was performing as Hannah Montana. Even Sharpay Evans of East High had all the glitz and glam, but she wasn't over the top with makeup and her clothes.Why are the kids in shows like "Liv and Maddie" and "Jessie" dressing like adults and acting like they have real world adult problems; it seems like they've just skipped over their innocent childhood years.

    Along with continuously being problematic and lacking real lessons for the audience to learn, current Disney Channel shows also lack substance. Every show is the same! Looking at the shows now, the actors & actresses look more materialistic and over the top. The channel now has unrealistic storylines, where as the shows in the 2000’s had real-life storylines that were more relatable to us. Even the character’s themselves now lack substance, and with most show’s you can easily point out the stereotypical “smart kid”, “dumb kid”, “popular kid”, etc.

    Luckily, Disney has attempted to redeem themselves with show’s such as Girl Meets World, a remake of the infamous Boy Meets World, which tackles similar issues to the ones seen in older Disney shows that we all know and love. That show got cancelled after only a few seasons though, unfortunately, but Disney then released the show Andi Mack, which is about a girl named Andi who on her 13th birthday discovers that her sister is actually her mother who had her when she was young.  One of the main characters also recently came out as gay, and I hope that this trend will continue on with more Disney Channel shows in the future. But, I guess we’ll have to wait and see.

    Like the great Hannah Montana once said, Everybody makes mistakes, everybody has those days, everybody knows what I’m talking about, everybody gets that way. Nobody’s perfect, and I wish Disney Channel would remember that, instead of shoving show’s about a dog who runs a blog down children’s throats. Not to mention how they let a horribly problematic YouTuber influencing the youth of today with his wildly inappropriate content on to one of their shows, but that’s a whole other rant for another day.

[zhenyakatava]

[last goodbye]

hello and welcome to the Most Extra Request Ever™. welcome. pls strap in! this request is for a cohort of people that (mostly) graduated from magnolia high in the class of 2011, and who are all interconnected through recently-deceased sam friar. as it often goes in small towns, kids who spent their whole lives being around each other tend to part ways at graduation and never see each other again. in this group’s case, they have no choice but to come back together for better or worse, and it’s done a great job at pointing out any cracks that still remain from years ago.

if you want to look at the chart above, pink = romantic / green = friendly / red = antagonistic / purple = familial. each character has a p...retty extensive blurb with lots of connections so we can try and ensure connections and interaction, but i think it’s rly important that everyone knows that these were relationships in high school (for the most part) and definitely don’t have to represent current relationships unless specified (like people who dated in high school don’t have to be dating now, people could have gone away even if it doesn’t specify, etc etc). also!! there will obviously be more connections made, i just could only put so much into graphic and writing before it got to be Too Much!

if you’re interested in a spot pls reply to this or message me or send me a lil msg on discord (morg#3278). xoxo bless

G1 - loren friar, 23, kat mcnamara (played by morgan)

G2 - graziella zavala, rafa constentino (played by betty)

G3 - heidi hope, 24, danielle campbell (played by maddie)

G4 - teddy townsend, 24, zoey deutch (played by suki)

B1 - noah foster, 24, quenten a (played by nicole)

B2 - first last, age, charlie rowe (played by liv)

B3 - micah friar, 24, carter jenkins (played by nick)

B4 - first last, age, face (played by emily)

samson friar (deceased): brilliant but lazy

sam grew up as the kid who acted out, who threw fits in class and got into fights on the playground. not many people really knew how hard sam had it, with strict evangelical parents who took all their frustrations out on him. at the end of the day, after using most of his time and energy being the protective big brother for twin boy 3 and little sister girl 1, he didn’t have much left for school. even though he’d always been smart, brimming with potential, he fought forces both external and internal - including only later-diagnosed borderline personality disorder - on his short-lived path to success. as he got older, the bad boy persona he’d acquired by acting out stuck hard and he rolled with it. he had his siblings and best friends since childhood, boy 4 and girl 3, to fall back on. their ragtag bunch got a pretty gnarly name for themselves, skipping class to smoke and throwing parties in abandoned houses. no one ever expected sam to start dating girl 4, universally known to be an uptight prude bitch. something clicked between them, and even though girl 3’s longstanding crush stood in the way of their relationship, it flourished regardless. for a while, she influenced him for the better. he shaped up, got his grades up, even made plans for college. that phase of their relationship was clearly a manic one, since those dreams died quickly. the romance was intensely passionate but also toxic, and despite the animosity she held for him for convincing her to stay local for school to be together and the personal struggles he faced, they refused to break up. in fact, they even decided to get married. about six months before his death, on the heels of the discovery that girl 4 had fallen pregnant, they got engaged. despite the romantic gesture, it couldn’t save their relationship or stop fate from intervening. when girl 4 miscarried, sam went off the rails. a minor drug habit that was once recreational became much more, and not long ago he ended up overdosing, leaving the carnage of family, friends, and lovers behind.

girl 1 (22-24): baby bookworm

sam and boy 3’s little sister, girl 1 was always tagging along with them. she never really fit in with people her age, never really fit in with people her brothers’ ages, so she was often left feeling isolated from everyone. this meant she often retreated into herself, not pursuing academics because of passion but instead because it was all she really had, one constant she could point to that would always be there. she hadn’t realized that perhaps some of the turmoil she felt came from her repressed sexuality until one night, after a party her brothers had begrudgingly let her go to, girl 2 kissed her. she’d never felt a crush like that before and never thought it would be with another girl. when boy 1 moved to magnolia, the two outcasts got along very quickly, becoming best friends and hanging out every single day. understandably, girl 1 was crushed when she found out that girl 2 had taken a liking to him and, apparently, the feelings were reciprocated. caught between her friendship and the protection of an almost-relationship she couldn’t even admit to, she decided to cut off the friendship with boy 1. just before her brother’s death, she finally gave in to boy 4, her brother’s best friend’s long-standing crush, and it’s not that she doesn’t like him, or that she doesn’t like boys, but that she still sees girl 2 at the grocery store and wonders whether it meant as much to girl 2 as it did to her. there’s also the strange fact that, when she looks at boy 4, she gets subtle reminders of her brother that make his loss easier, and isn’t it close enough to love that they’ve gotten each other through this?

girl 2 (24-25): prom queen

never the smartest in the bunch, girl 2 had to rely on street smarts, common sense and good looks to get along. clever in her own way, she was always particularly attuned to people - how to make them tick, how to get what she wanted, how to make connections like no other. maybe that’s why she was always flitting from guy to guy - though girl 1 would certainly say otherwise. she went from one bad relationship to another in high school, trying to find something in a guy that she couldn’t find on her own. after an ugly breakup with her long-term boyfriend, boy 2, that ended in absolute chaos, she was surprised to find herself interested in the unassuming new boy, boy 1. her friends, including part-time friend and part-time enemy girl 4, were surprised that she’d go for a nice guy - but she knew she needed a change of pace. getting girl 1 to leave her alone in the process was just an added perk - i mean, she was never gay or anything, just curious, and was that so wrong?

suggested faces: nicola peltz, cierra ramirez, camila mendes, madelaine petsch, taylor hill, halston sage, sofia carson, natalie alen lind, virginia gardner

girl 3 (24-25): bad genes

girl 3 was hardly given a fighting chance by the Powers That Be. her drug-addicted parents abandoned her early, leaving her with her not-much-better relatives, a revolving door of grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins and the like. it was no wonder she started hanging out with fellow garbage kids, boy 4 and sam. it was a surprise to her, though, that she found herself head over heels in love with sam. the feeling was never returned, really, outside of a few awkward kisses or fondling when he was off with girl 4. everyone was always asking why she didn’t just date boy 3, but the girl was perpetually oblivious to his advances because she was always focused intently on sam. at least she thought she was - but his death proved otherwise. she had actually thought things were looking up, and had been given renewed hope for her repressed love after they slept together one night. when he overdosed despite everything she’d done and everything she felt, girl 3 blamed herself more than anyone. the only thing keeping her from going off the rails (just like her one-time true love) is boy 3, and she’s starting to see what everyone was always talking about when they insisted she choose him instead.

girl 4 (24-25): academic alpha bitch

how do you not crack under the pressure when the weight of the world is on your shoulders? girl 4 was always so good at that, not without the help of anti-anxiety meds and meticulous journaling, always keeping up appearances to be the good, smart, promising girl everyone expected her to be. sam was her break from that, something that shocked absolutely everyone. she was too good, too smart, and had too much potential to be with someone like that. really, though, he was the only thing that made her feel anything but anxiety or anger. she made enemies everywhere she went, seeing everyone as a competitor, from her so-called best friend girl 2 to sam’s best friend girl 3 to her class president opponent, boy 2. sam was always her ally, no matter what, even if they fought. everyone blamed it on him, but she made mistakes too - namely, sleeping with boy 2 after a particularly bad fight. in truth, she wasn’t even sure whose baby it was, but either way she was relieved in a way when she miscarried. sam… not so much. she watched his downward spiral but didn’t have the tools to stop it as he froze her out and distanced himself further and further away from her - and, as she saw it, toward girl 3. girl 4 was the one to find him, and it’s a memory she could never forget, something that makes her regret the relief she felt not to be inextricably linked to him. grief-stricken as she is, how can she not see this as a fresh start?

suggested faces: willa fitzgerald, haley lu richardson, naomi scott, jessica sula, saoirse ronan, olivia cooke, zoey deutch, alycia debnam carey, camila mendes, halston sage, daisy ridley, logan browning

boy 1 (23-24): foreign exchange student

texas was nothing like where boy 1 came from. when he transferred to magnolia high, he didn’t know up from down or this from that. he was helpless - and girl 1 helped him. he developed a crush on her quickly, warming to her southern drawl and the way she talked when she got excited about something she was telling him about. at the same time, he started getting closer and closer to his mentor, the girl who was assigned to help him get acclimated to his new home and his new school: girl 2. it was strange to him that, when he became friends with girl 2, girl 1 stopped sitting next to him in economics, stopped eating with him at lunch, stopped answering his texts or calls. he didn’t see the correlation until later, when girl 2 made tasteless a joke about girl 1 being a lesbian. he had to adapt, either sink or swim in the high school environment he found himself in, and being with girl 2 meant swimming - and anyway, girl 1 clearly wasn’t interested anyway. 

suggested faces: timothee chalamet, tom holland, john boyega, noah centineo, xavier serrano, avan jogia, keiynan lonsdale, nick robinson, tye sheridan

boy 2 (24-25): big man on campus

boy 2 had everything he needed to succeed in life. his family had money in oil, he was exceedingly smart, he was good at sports and great with the ladies. he had everything going for him - well, almost everything. the only thing standing between him and success was a little temper that found him getting into fights on the football field or getting into screaming matches with his ex-girlfriend girl 2 in the middle of the hallway at school. he just needed something to channel all that energy into, so he signed up to run for class president, a good old fashioned competition that he could put some positive energy into. he never expected it to be such a tough battle, and much less expected to get into it with girl 4. perpetual rivals in school, their rivalry came to a head during the presidential election. she won, but he developed a fascination with her and a hatred for her garbage boyfriend, sam. he went off for college, but she never really left his mind. he came back recently after losing his job (he says he resigned, but that’s twisted the whole truth a little) and met girl 4 in a bar, and he thought their getting together would be a good thing for them - he could give her everything sam couldn’t, everything she needed and deserved. turns out he was just a distraction, and he told himself he’d draw a line. the line has been drawn even further since sam’s death, since boy 2 definitely doesn’t want to get involved with a dead guy’s fiancee. still, he can’t help but wish she’d reach out…

suggested faces: keith powers, dacre montgomery, ansel elgort, jacob elordi, matt noszka, carter jenkins, thomas doherty, gregg sulkin, logan shroyer

boy 3 (24-25): the unassuming one

boy 3 always felt positively boring, not good or bad but somewhere plainly in the middle. his twin brother sam was always getting the attention - mostly negative, but boy 3 quickly became a firm believer in life that all attention is good attention. he was always grateful for the protection he got, for himself and for little sister girl 1, but at the same time was resentful of his brother for his notoriety. they shared everything, like best friend boy 4, and everything else went automatically to sam. sam never respected what he wanted to do or who he wanted to see, including girl 3. sam always knew that he liked her, and yet sam used her crush on him to his advantage at any possible time. as close as they always had been, the resentment was too much for boy 3 to handle and, when he got the chance, he decided to go off and backpack across europe to find himself before going to college across the country. he’s back now for the funeral, and while he know better who he is now, he can’t help but hate himself a little for driving a wedge between himself and his other half. he’s falling into old habits now, trying to reconnect with the person he used to be in any way he can - like how he’s fallen back in with girl 3. now, he can’t tell whether this is growth, or if he’s just regressing back to his lesser self.

suggested faces: logan lerman, joe keery, nat wolff, cole sprouse, carter jenkins

boy 4 (24-25): class clown

no one ever took boy 4 seriously. he was always sort of dumb, this caricature of a class clown that had nothing else to offer. after a while, he sort of saw himself as that, too. he moved in a pack with boy 3 and sam, cracking jokes whenever he could and coasting along until high school would finally end. he spent so much of his young life hanging out with the twins that he became well acquainted with girl 1, their little sister. the boys had their own things, girlfriends and schoolwork and everything, and as they got older and boy 4 found himself devoid of any real passion, he spent a lot of idle time with her, learning from her and maybe, secretly, falling in love with her. he always knew how protective sam was of her, though, and as fiercely loyal as he was, he would never sacrifice their friendship for anyone - not even someone as amazing as her. sam dying was the worst pain he’s ever felt in his life, and if being around girl 1 is mutually beneficial, wouldn’t sam be okay with that? he has to tell himself yes, otherwise the guilt would overtake him and he can’t deal with that on top of everything. 

[thetimelordbatgirl]

I was wondering, how did them adding Dove's real boyfriend ruin the character Maddie for a bit? I haven't Liv & Maddie in a while, so I don't know that much (though I don't mind spoilers) and I didn't even know that the man who played (Doug?) was her real life boyfriend til just now. So, I'm sorry for the possibly silly question.

Tbh, Maddie and Diggie was fine- I honestly don’t know when Dove and Ryan started dating- I just know apparently they were around the time the whole love triangle of Maddie/Josh/Diggie happened in the show- as prior to season 3, Maddie and Diggie decided to go separate ways as a result of a long going argument/fall out over Maddie and Diggies break up- and that leads to season 3 where later on, Liv’s co-star Josh and Maddie started dating (please note, this was set up by Liv in some sense as well)- which was fine, they were more cute and really, I kinda liked how we at least got Maddie prior to dating him, unlike instantly introducing the love interest in the first episode….then again which show of D.C hasn’t done that in modern DC….

But the problem comes in the episode when Diggie comes back- we not only in this ep see Liv and Holden break up, but also Diggie return- and both are tied here, as the reason Holden and Liv broke up was because a news reporter took a picture of Maddie and Josh while the pair were on a date, believing Maddie to be Liv as Maddie had no glasses on at the time and I think her hair was down?

But Liv soon has to pick- help her sister protect her secret dating life from Diggie (they were separated at this point, meaning its not cheating, its just kinda…Maddie being afraid) until Maddie can clear it up with Diggie or clear it up with the news that it was Maddie, not Liv, with Josh for Holden- this leads to Liv choosing Maddie and in the process, Holden feeling like Liv has no room for him and in the end, breaking up.

Now Maddie in the end decides to cheer up Liv by taking her to a restraunt- while Liv is getting a table though, Diggie suddenly turns up (was it ever explained how Diggie KNEW she was there? like, it never was….was he stalking her or something?) and Diggie admits he came to get Maddie back as he saw the picture and is upset Maddie has moved on- much to Maddies shock, and Liv doesn’t help when she presses onto Maddie, that Maddie has to choose- end episode.

Next Ep….lord, what happened to Maddies character was horrible- she lost her independence in this episode! She wasn’t allowed a choice in the love triangle! Like, at the beginning its revealed she told Diggie she needs space…only for Diggie to disrespect that space and come in on it acting like Maddies a prize just cause she moved on and was clearly happy- but this train wreck continues when just when we get happy Maddie at the wedding of Gemma and Johnny Nimbus…Joey reveals Diggie was his plus 1, and Diggie reveals to us, the viewers, he wants to give Miggie one last chance and essentially seems to be caring more about his feelings then Maddies, who not only has a boyfriend then but is also very clear shes happy with Josh- meaning Diggie��came off as terrible really.

When the wedding happens- cue trainwreck, as Maddie has a…more of a BRTOP moment tbh, with Diggie where he and she throw bread rolls into hats of people- but Liv…somehow sees it as romance and claims she somehow knows Maddies romance better then Maddie herself does….which Maddie weakly protests too but never stops Liv from talking to Artie and then both acting like Maddies a prize for Diggie to win, yes, this is right- EVEN LIV IS DOING THIS, HER OWN TWIN FOR THAT MATTER- And lets be clear: Liv helped Maddie get with Josh….shes basically being the worst friend and sister there in one shot.

Maddie, throughout this, is not shown- but then of course, the emotional manipulation of Diggie happens when Liv has Diggie play at the wedding instead of Liv and….Maddies choice is made- not by Maddie though, by JOSH- yes, the independent character who told Liv that if Liv meddled in Maddies love life, Maddie would hurt her, just….listened to someones suggestion and went along with it, easily falling for Diggies emotional manipulation in the process and therefore, just…ruining the idea that Maddies independent and makes her own choices, because when it came to love triangles…Maddie got them, not Liv.

And next ep, Diggie doesn’t appear- is mentioned by Maddie simply as Maddie claims shes seeing him over spending time outside with her brother- like….I never got why this trainwreck HAD to happen.

In some sense- I feel like this was Doves relationship that came in- cause DC seems willing to do anything for their new princess, and cause the pair were…engaged, I think at least, at the time- meaning we had to see Maddie ruined in favour of Doves character and Ryans character being together- AND THERE WAS NO POINT? He didn’t appear in season 4 until last episode!

Sorry if I rambled, I just….kinda dislike LAM nowadays after rewatching it…..

[bloodlinesbabe93]

Scared ~ Part 19

my anxiety levels have been extremely high since we arrived at our hotel last night. i was barely able to sleep. we were officially in Cincinnati, my hometown. where my brother and father lived.

I had snuck out of the hotel room this morning. I wanted to go see my mom's grave site. and Ethan, Allie and their unborn child's graves as well. I didn't want Adam or the others following me. I needed some kind of closure. I needed to see them.

I walked to the cemetery, which was only about 5 minutes from our hotel.  I walked down the familiar paths, until I reached the area where my family members were buried. I already felt the tears beginning to come. I hadn't been here alone in almost a year. Last time I had Adam and Maddie by my side, and all kinds of family and friends as we buried my brother, and his wife.

"I knew you'd come big sister" I turned around and saw Patrick. with the most evil smirk on his face.

"what the hell are you doing here?"

"taking what's rightfully mine" he says grabbing my by my hair and throwing me to the ground. "now with Ethan out of the way, I can treat you like the slut you really are"

he repeatedly hit my head against the ground. trying to knock me out. I tried to free myself but he was far too strong. I knew he was going to take what he wanted, then probably drag me back to my father, so he could have his turn. I was scared for my life.

"admit it, Olivia. You've missed my touch"

"no I haven't. the last few months without you have been the best of my life"

"shut up slut" he punched me in the face. within seconds I could feel the blood trickling down my nose.

I laid there scared. I couldn't fight back. I just had to lay there and take it as he raped me again. I had never been so afraid. It felt like hours I was in his grasp.  I never thought it was going to end. round after round, I felt my body tensing up more and more from the pain. not only from my head hitting the ground, but the pain of being raped.

"stop crying you little slut. it's not that bad. you know you love it"

I never thought it was going to end. until he eventually pulled out. fixed his clothes, and kicked me as he walked by without saying a word. I don't know what was worse. that fact that he hurt me again. or the fact that he did it right in front of our mom's grave, and Ethan's grave.

I could barely stand as I tried to get up, I was weak, and afraid. if Patrick was around. I knew my dad was around somewhere. and he'd be coming for his.  I walked as fast as I could back toward the direction of the hotel. thankful I was now on a main road. so there were a few people around. I looked down as I walked. not wanting people to see my face and how bad I was hurt.

I walked into the hotel, and into my shared room with Adam, finding him gone.  I was thankful. I just wanted to be alone. I didn't want him to see me like this. I had decided to take a bath. I wanted the feeling of his touch off of my skin.

I pulled my knees to my chest and just began to cry. I couldn't believe what had happened. after probably 25 minutes.  I heard a knock on the bathroom door "babe" Adam says gently as he opens the door. I quickly pulled back the shower curtain so he couldn't see me.

"we're leaving for the venue soon. I just thought you might want to eat breakfast before we leave" he says

"no thanks i'm not hungry" I say trying to make my voice sound as normal as possible.

"you sure? i'll go down and make you a plate and bring it up to you, so you can finish relaxing"

"yeah i'm sure"

he moved the shower curtain and sat on the edge of the tub. but from the moment he saw me, his face dropped

"Liv, what happened" he asks

I cried harder as I felt his arms wrap around me. lifting me out of the bathtub, and carrying me to our bed. he gently touched all the markings and bruises as he tried to make sense of what happened.

"you guys almost ready we need to head out" I hear Roddy say through the door. Adam walked over to the door letting them in as I wrapped a blanket around myself. I didn't want them to see anything. I still had tears in my eyes as they came into the room.

"what the hell did you do this time?" Bobby asks Adam. looking like he was ready to swing.

"I found her like this a few minutes ago. she has bruises and marks all over her body." Adam says still worried

"what happened Liv, you can tell us anything" Roddy says.

my eyes started becoming tear filled again, and I shook my head.

"come on Liv, you have to tell us what happened. we can't make it better if you don't talk to us" Bobby says

"he.. he raped me" I managed to choke out.

their faces fell at what I just told them.  

"who did this to you Olivia?" Adam asks. now having tears in his own eyes.

"Patrick"

"oh my god" Adam says pulling me into his arms

Each one of them hugged me tightly. I could tell they were extremely worried about what had happened but I didn't want to tell them the whole story.

"you need to go to the hospital and get checked out" Bobby says

I shook my head and cuddled closer to Adam

"he's right babe. i'll be right there with you. you look like you've been beaten up pretty bad. you might even have a broken nose"

"what about my match tonight? i can't just not show up for work"

"you're in no shape to wrestle tonight" Bobby says

"go get checked out and you can come over to the arena. we'll tell them you're going to be late" Roddy says

"just please don't tell them why. I don't want people knowing and spreading rumors"

"nobody would do that" Kyle says gently

"we need to get to the arena. but we'll see you soon alright?" Bobby asks kissing my forehead

"here, we'll get a ride with someone else. just make sure she gets taken care of" Kyle says handing Adam the keys to the rental car. Adam smiles as the guys leave our room

Adam helps me slowly get dressed, my body hurt so bad from being thrown to the ground, kicked, hit. it hurt far more than I was used to. no match in the ring could produce this amount of pain.

"I got you babe. you're safe" he says trying to reassure me

from the moment we walked into the hospital I instantly regretted agreeing to go. I was put through so many scans, and tests making sure I wasn't bleeding internally. that I didn't have any broken bones, or a concussion from my head hitting the ground.

"everything's going to be fine" he says holding my hand as I sat in the hospital bed. waiting for answers. hoping.. praying even that nothing was seriously wrong

"Olivia" I hear a gentle knock on the door before the doctor walked in. "i'm Dr. Courtney, we've reviewed the CT Scan, and X-Rays. there are no signs of internal bleeding, but you do have a broken arm, and nose. you also have a grade 1 concussion" she says

"i'm just glad its nothing severe" Adam says

"we'll get a cast on your arm, reset your nose and you'll be discharged soon" she says

"thank you" I say

she smiles as she exits the room. Adam kisses my cheek and holds my hand tightly as they fix my nose.

"fuck" I scream as they reset it back into place

"good as new" one of the nurses says

"time for the cast what color do you want?" someone asks

"I guess purple" she smiles and they start applying the cast

"isn't this the second time you've broke you arm?" Adam asks

"yeah, well this time wasn't my fault though"

"I know, I just remember you telling me how you broke it the first time"

"yeah, i broke both of them the same way. falling off the swing set."

"but you were little. so it wasn't like you really knew better" he says

"well the second time I was 8. so I should have known. but I didn't." he laughs and shakes his head

"alright you're ready to be discharged" one of the nurses says happily

"thank you for fixing her up" Adam says

"no problem. be careful okay?" she says before giving me a hug

"I will, thanks"

"alright babe, let's head to the venue" he says

he took my hand that wasn't in the sling, and slowly walked with me to the car. opening my door for me allowing me to get in. I was pretty pitiful and couldn't even buckle my seatbelt by myself. this damn sling they had my arm in  was already annoying.

"thank you Adam" I say giving him a sweet kiss

"you don't need to thank me love, i'll always be here to help you"

I was glad I had him even though i was still in a lot of pain. he somehow made it a little bit better.

"you want anything for lunch? you're probably starving by now" Adam asks

"no i'm okay" I say quietly

"you sure?" he asks sounding worried

"yeah, i'm good"

it was a short 10 minute drive to the venue. I knew I was dreading telling Triple H and Mr. Regal what happened. and that I would be out for a while. Adam grabbed his bags out of the car, and held my hand as we walked inside

"oh my God are you okay?" Bobby asks as soon as he sees me

"nothing too serious, broken arm, broken nose and a mild concussion. I got lucky. it could have been much worse" they each hugged me again.

"i'm so sorry Liv. i'm glad you're okay" Roddy says

"its okay. i'm glad its nothing serious. and I should be able to get back in the ring in a few months"

"i'm going to kill him" Bobby says

"I don't even know where he is or i'd let you"

"if you see that piece of shit let me know. i'll beat him into next year" Bobby says again

"I second that" Kyle says

"I doubt they'll make an appearance." I say

"alright babe, we need to go talk with Triple H and Mr. Regal. let them know what happened and how long you'll be out for" Adam says

"I got it. let me talk to them alone okay? i'll meet you guys back in the locker room" I say before walking down the long hallway to Triple H's office. I knocked on the door before slowly entering

"There you are Olivia. Bobby said you were in the hospital this morning. is everything okay?" Mr. Regal asks

"well. long story short no. I ran into my younger brother who is very abusive. and he hurt me pretty bad. he raped me multiple times, broke my arm, my nose and gave me a concussion"

they both remained silent for a moment. not knowing what to say

"i'll be fine in a couple of months. but obviously I can't wrestle with my injuries. I just wanted to let you know the extent of everything."

"i'm so sorry Olivia. if you need anything please let me know." Triple H says

"I will thank you"

"Are you going to continue to travel on this tour?" Mr. Regal asks

"yeah. I want to be with my boyfriend. and i want my niece to be able to see the country"

"that's fine. just make sure you're taking care of yourself. our doors are always open if you need us" Mr. Regal says again.

"thank you guys" I say before exiting the office. I walked back to the locker room I shared with the guys. I was relieved to finally be able to relax and spend time with my boyfriend

"how did it go?" he asks kissing my cheek

"fine. i'm going to travel on the tour with you, I need to be with you. I don't want to be alone"

"good. I wasn't going to let you go without a fight. not after everything that happened this morning" he says wrapping his arm around me

"what exactly happened this morning?" Bobby asks

I looked at the floor and gently started to speak. "I went to visit my mom's grave and my brothers grave. I didn't expect him to be there but he was. he pulled my by my hair and threw me to the ground. slamming my head against the concrete multiple times. punched me, raped me multiple times. and kicked me as he walked by to leave. I don't know what's worse. the fact that it happened or the face that he did it right in front of my mom's grave and Ethan's grave" I felt tears coming to my eyes again. each of them surrounding me in a hug.

"that's fucked up" Kyle says

"i'm so sorry Liv" Roddy says

"i'm going to fucking kill him" Bobby says slamming his fist down

"there's nothing you can do now. its too late"

"oh there is something I can do. i'm going to show that piece of shit why you don't mess with my daughter"

"it's okay Bobby. we're leaving after the show anyway"

"it's not okay Olivia. he's hurt you too many times before. and i'm not going to let it happen again" he says

"please just stop" I say trying to fight back more tears

"you're okay babe. I got you" Adam says

"sorry Liv. I just don't want to see you get hurt" Bobby says gently

"it's okay guys. I know you just want to help. but after tonight hopefully i'll never see him again"

"we need to get ready for our match" Adam says sadly

"that's okay love. i'll be here waiting for you when you get back"

"you sure you don't want to hang out with Candice and the girls?" Adam asks. I shook my head

"i just want to rest. i'm still pretty sore"

"i'm sorry love. anything I can do?" he asks

"no I'll be okay"

"you want me to go get Maddie and bring her in here to keep you company?" he asks

"if you want to. I've missed her"

she had been spending the morning with Candice and Johnny. they had agreed to take her at dinner last night. she absolutely loved them.

"i'll go get her" Bobby says as the others got dressed. Bobby was still out with his knee injury. so atleast I had someone else to hang out with. just incase something happened.

"Aunt Liv" Maddie says happily running to me

"hi baby. did you have fun?" she nods

"what happened?" she asks

"somebody did some bad stuff to her. but don't worry she's okay" Adam says

"I like your pretty purple cast" she says hugging me

"thanks sweetheart"

"can we watch Uncle Kyle, Adam and Roddy?" she asks

"yeah we can watch from backstage"

"yay" she says happily

"you sure you want to go? i'll take her so you can relax" Bobby says

"I don't mind. I want to watch Adam kick butt"

he shakes his head and laughs. "alright lets go then" he says

I watched as they made their entrance. each of them had a cocky smirk on their face and I loved it. the crowd was very much behind them. I loved looking out into the crowd and seeing their reactions.

my face dropped when I saw two familiar faces in the front row. My dad and Patrick.

"you okay?" Bobby asks

"they're here"

"whose here" he asks

"my brother and my dad"

"where?" he asks

I pointed them out. and I could see anger on his face

"I don't know what to do" I say now very afraid.

"i'll handle it" he says walking back toward the locker rooms. I was scared to see what he actually planned on doing. but once I saw security escort them out I felt a lot better

"don't worry. you won't see them for a while" Triple H says

"what do you mean"

"they're getting sent to jail." Bobby says

"thank you" I say hugging him

"anything to make you safe."

I heard the bell ring and Adam's hand being raised in victory as he and the other two quickly walked to the back.

"how did you like the match?" Adam asks

"well I got a bit distracted during it"

"let me guess staring at lover boy" Kyle teases

"nope. I saw my dad and Patrick in the crowd"

"where are they?" Roddy asks sounding mad

"did you see the two get taken out by security? those two. they're going to jail. hopefully for the rest of their lives"

"I saw that and wondered what that was about. i'm glad you're safe. had you not see them who knows what they would have tried" Kyle says

"if they had laid a finger on you or Maddie I would have killed them" Adam says

"don't worry about it love. i'm safe and so is she. but I vote we get the hell out of here and fast. I want to get as far away from this city as possible"

"let us get ready and we'll leave. we have a 4 hour drive ahead of us anyway." Adam says

"we'll stop for dinner about half way through. you need to eat. Adam told us you haven't eaten today" Bobby says

"Adam has a big mouth"

"i'm glad he told us. now we can be there to encourage you just like he did your second night with us. you have to eat Liv. I know its been a rough day but you have to eat" Roddy says

"fine. i'll eat something small if it will shut you up"

"everything's going to be okay babe. I promise"

"I know. I trust you guys. but please hurry up and get ready. I want to get out of here as fast as possible. i'm scared"

"i'll stay with her while you guys get ready" Bobby says

"I need to get her bag from the girls locker room, and make sure she's ready to go" I say taking Maddie's hand and walking with her toward the girls locker room.  Bobby followed behind us. and stood outside as we walked in.

"Liv what happened?" Candice asks noticing the sling and cast on my arm

"my abusive brother happened. he hurt me pretty good and raped me"

"oh my god" she says in horror, gently hugging me

"I just wanted to get her stuff. we're going to be heading out once the guys are ready"

"I don't blame you. you've had a rough day" she says

"I know. but i'll be okay."

"thank you for spending the morning with her. I know she loves you guys"

"we love her too. she's almost like a daughter to us" she says happily

I quickly packed up her bag of toys and coloring books. I was glad Maddie was willing to help me. she could see how bad I was hurting.

"alright Mads, let's go to the bathroom before we leave. we don't want to stop until dinner" she smiles and nods, running into the bathroom. I slowly followed behind her.

I was glad she was taking things so well. especially everything that had happened over the last few months. she was trying her best to listen and do as she was told. I tried to lift her up to the sink so she could wash her hands but I couldn't I was too weak.

"let's go find Uncle Adam. he can pick you up" I say making her giggle

"there you two are. ready?" Adam asks as we walked out of the bathroom.

"can you help her was her hands? I tried picking her up but I can't"

"of course love. you shouldn't have tried in the first place. I don't want you hurting yourself" he says

"I'm fine love" I say giving him a kiss

"the guys are in the locker room waiting, we'll be there in a minute okay?" he says

I nod and start walking toward our shared locker room.

"there she is" Kyle says as I opened the door and walked in.

"where's Adam and Maddie?" Bobby asks

"bathroom. i'm not strong enough to pick her up to wash her hands. especially not with this thing" I hated this damn sling. It was going to be the death of me.

"alright lets head out" Adam says walking into the room carrying Maddie

"can I sit with Uncle Bobby? he makes a better pillow" Maddie says making me laugh

"of course you can" Bobby says

"looks like you've been replaced" I say to Adam

"that just means I get to sit next to you and snuggle up to my gorgeous girlfriend"

it was a struggle for me to climb into the backseat. once again I couldn't buckle my seatbelt. and it was really annoying. I hated having to have someone help me with the simplest tasks.

"i got it love" Adam says helping me again

"i hate this thing. I can't do anything"

"you can take it off in a few days. but until then you better get used to me helping you" he says giving me a sweet kiss.

I had leaned my head on his shoulder and managed to get comfortable. he had wrapped his arm around me so I felt a little more protected. I was so glad I had him with me.

"you tired?" he asks. I nodded

"take a nap love. we have a long drive ahead of us"

I shivered as I cuddled closer to him

"here" he says taking off his sweatshirt and wrapping it around me

"aren't you going to get cold" I asj

"its worth it if it means you're warm"

"I have an extra blanket of Maddie's in the back if you want to dig it out"

"I don't think a Cinderella blanket is my look babe" he says making me laugh

"i'll take it and you can take your hoodie back"

"i'm fine love. now go to sleep. you need to rest"

I felt my eyes starting to get heavy. eventually falling asleep. snuggled up next to the love of my life. for one of the first times of the day I felt safe and protected. something I'd never take for granted again.

@thebutterflygirl16

[mind-set-to-blog-mode]

Top 5 Woman-Crush-Wednesday's

Anyone remember my blog post on the Top 5 Man Crush Monday's? Remember how I said I would write a post in the next couple of days? Well a year has past and still haven't done it, so what the heck. Better late that never.

Moving from 2016 to 2017, I'm still the same Joe. The s*** with money, power ranger obsessed Joe. But with a touch more sass. Well I think so anyway. And recently I have been admiring a few female stars with what they've achieved and their talent. Which is why not so long ago I created the slogan GGL. GGL stands for Gay Girl Love. This is for when a gay man (such as myself) really likes a female person for multiple reasons such as their hair, voice, stuff they appeared or worked for etc. Multiple traits that you really admire about one person. For example, Nicole Scherzinger. I think her voice is brilliant, her hair is always flawless, her song Poison is amazing and she was killing it in the music video. I love her for all that. More than just saying 'OMG I love her' but not in the way of really loving/ fancying her. So then I would say I have GGLs for Nicole. If that makes sense. So going back to the trend of WCW. WCW stands for Woman Crush Wednesday. This is exactly the same as Man Crush Monday but with Woman and on a Wednesday. I am obviously not the kind of guy who would use this hashtag to post pics on their social media of bikini models wearing only swimsuits showing off their boobs and butts (for an obvious reason which I've said 2/3 times already). But it doesn't mean I would ignore the hashtag. Just because I'm not attracted to women doesn't mean I think women are only good for showing off their body and absolutely nothing else. Women can do what men can do and vice versa. Equality, plain and simple. There are so many great people who have done some amazing things who are female. And despite not being attracted to them, I would use the WCW hashtag to show how incredible they are in what they've achieved. So this post is a list of my Top 5 most likely Woman Crush Wednesday's. I think these people are amazing and you'll find out why.

5. Poppy

https://youtu.be/xqH3KaW25AA

The person in the photo above (who's hair is amazing btw) is Poppy. She's Poppy. She's Poppy. She's Poppy. She's Poppy. She's Poppy. She's Poppy. She's Poppy. She's Poppy. She's Poppy.  She's Poppy. She's Poppy. She's Poppy. She's Poppy. She's Poppy. She's Poppy. She's Poppy. She's Poppy. She's Poppy. She's Poppy. She's Poppy. She's Poppy. She's Poppy. She's Poppy. She's Poppy. She's Poppy. She's Poppy. She's Poppy. Okay. That's enough. You are most likely to have skip read all of that but if you somehow decided to read all the sentences, how long did it take you? It took me 25 seconds which felt long enough to read 2 words. But imagine having two words said on and on for over 10 minutes, weird right. That didn't stop Poppy. Oh hell no! Poppy (also known as That Poppy) is an artist who has been known to make YouTube videos which weird the s*** out of everyone. One of her most popular videos is where she repeats herself saying "I'm Poppy" for over 10 minutes. And that's just one video. From interviewing a plant, to teaching you how to play the 'P' chord, to giving you a virtual hug and to loading a gun. There's a huge variety of weird. And I like that. Not your typical YouTuber, it's a fresh change. Especially since nobody knows much about her. Whether if this is all an act, what she is really like, if this is her actual personality, her age, interests. No one knows. But that doesn't stop a video of hers making you think. And you don't know what to think, you just do. From anything to everything. However, her videos are not why she made it in this list. The music she has released is incredible. Despite the videos being weird and probably full of hidden messages, the actual songs are simply beautiful. Examples include Lowlife, Money & I'm Poppy. Have a little listen for yourself and you'll see why she made the list.

4. Naomi Scott

http://www.lionsgatepublicity.com/theatrical/powerrangers/

There's obviously gonna be a Power Ranger in this list. It is me after all. Naomi Scott (who was also in the Disney Channel Original Movie 'Lemonade Mouth') plays Kimberly Heart, the Pink Ranger in the Power Rangers 2017 Reboot Movie. Based of the original 1993 character, Naomi does a brilliant job of bringing the character to life again with so much more depth. Not going into too much detail which could spoil the movie, her character has a brilliant way of teaching people that you can learn from the mistakes you make and just because you do a bad thing, it won't automatically make you a bad person. An important message, shown perfectly well. Not only just that, Naomi's character gives you so many moments that get you pumped in this movie too. There's scenes which makes you laugh, get excited, be shocked, and feel worried etc. There's even a scene where she walks down a staircase (pictured) and you can't help but think 'Yassss Queen, Slay That Staircase'. Or at least just me anyway. Simply said, the way she portrayed the character was on point, you can't help but love the new Mighty Morphin Pink Ranger.

3. Dove Cameron

http://www.game-ost.com/albums/87630/one_second_chance_from_%22liv_and_maddie_cali_style%22_-_single/

There maybe two in the picture but trust me, there is only one Dove!

Dove Cameron is a current Disney Channel Queen. Now don't get me wrong. I loved growing up with Disney Channel. My childhood dream was to be in front of a white backdrop holding a glow stick saying "I'm Joe Smith and you're watching Disney Channel" whilst drawing Mickey Mouse ears (if you don't know what I'm on about, watch this). High School Musical, Hannah Montana & That's So Raven. Those were the classics. I lost count how many times people who know me personally asked me if I knew about the Raven sequel series that's been announced. Of course I did. It's me. But it's safe to say that most things made after Season 2 of Shake It Up were pretty awful. To some, I'm even being generous by saying the first season of SIU was decent. I feel like I can safely say shows like Dog With A Blog and Ant Farm lost a generation of viewers. They lost comedy and Disney Channel spark. To me, the Disney Channel I knew was dead. But a couple of years later, the return of Cory and Topenga from Boy Meets Worlds sequel series Girl Meets World, brought me back to the channel. The show is special and brought back some magic of enjoyment like my younger self had from my DC days. I didn't even watch Boy Meets World but I could feel so much nostalgia and happy feelings from it as well. Because of this, I could watch other shows every now and then from around that time (such as I Didn't Do It, K.C. Undercover, Best Friends Whenever) and despite not enjoying them as much as the old shows (mainly because I'm [apparently] an adult and these are made for teens), they wouldn't be an unpleasant viewing. But not so long ago, I subscribed to Disney Life to binge watch the old shows as often as I wanted to. But there was one show I couldn't help but take a little look at. And that was Liv And Maddie. A few episodes passed and that was it. Turns out despite the immature comedy and easy to figure out plots sometimes, there's something about the show I really like. I don't know what it is but I really do enjoy watching Liv And Maddie. Liv And Maddie stars Dove Cameron as both Liv Rooney & Maddie Rooney. Identical twin sisters who are reunited and living together after Liv comes back home after filming her own TV show for quite a long time. Remember earlier how I said women are more than just here to look pretty and nothing else? Well Liv And Maddie deals with this topic really well. They bring up topics from guys ranking the girls from 0-10 just on their appearance, schools putting more money & care to boy sports teams than girl teams and female actors getting more questioned about what they wear than their time on making the show. Liv And Maddie just screams girl power, and it's done perfectly well. The show ran for three seasons and a fourth with the updated title Liv And Maddie: Cali Style (pictured above). The show has something unique about it (joining the small list of DC shows that got the 4th season renewal such as That's So Raven, Hannah Montana & Good Luck Charlie) and Dove does a brilliant job of bringing such big personalities to life in two characters with the way the show is made. But it's not just this show that makes Dove a Disney Channel Queen. She also is a Disney Villain... Kinda...

http://gattaracinefila.blogspot.co.uk/2016/10/recensioni-di-descedants-i-guardiani.html

Dove also stars as Mal, Maleficent's daughter in the Disney Channel Original Movie Descendants. Not going into too much detail because I've talked about Dove a lot but this film is pretty decent. A story about the kids of Disney heroes & villains is gonna catch my interest. Kenny Ortega who directed High School Musical did this as well so I can use that as an alibi to prove it isn't awful. And soon there is going to be a sequel and I am really excited to see it. I haven't been excited to see a DCOM since Camp Rock 2. So that is why Dove is in the list. Mirror Mirror, on the wall, who's the baddest of them all? I'm not genuinely asking, it a quote from the movie. I felt like I needed to put it there.

2. Becky G

http://www.lionsgatepublicity.com/theatrical/powerrangers/

That's the longest I've ever gone not talking about Power Rangers. How did I mange that?! But carrying on with the list. Becky G is Number 2 on this list. She is a Pop Princess in the United States. Not that popular in the UK (yet), you may remember her collaboration with Cher Lloyd. But it's not just her music that puts her on this list. Like Naomi, Becky G plays Trini Kwan, the Yellow Ranger in the Power Rangers 2017 Reboot Movie. But Becky brings a change to her original 1993 character in such a great way and is a ranger you can really like. One of the things about her character is that she's gay. She admits this is in the movie and she talks about how she struggles moving home all the time and living with parents who want her to be perfect and how they believe in all these types of labels. And Becky's character deals with this topic in a small but brilliant way. Trini is the first openly gay Ranger in the whole PR universe and that's an amazing step forward. Power Rangers has been around for a long time and always been diverse with their many different cast members. The movies cast is also diverse and the fact that it's not just dealing with race but now sexuality as well, it's a brilliant thing. The cast and the way their characters are portrayed are done perfectly well. That's what makes Power Rangers a great movie. And Becky G plays a huge part in this, which is why I admire her.

1. Ariana Grande

http://gazettereview.com/2017/03/ariana-grande-net-worth/

Another Pop Princess makes the list and takes the crown as Number 1. Ariana Grande needs no introduction and if you don't know who she is, you've been living under a rock. Even though I'm not her biggest fan, I still have serious GGL's for Ariana. I loved watching her play the role of Cat Valentine in the Nickelodeon series Victorious. The not so smart but still so talented character was portrayed by Ariana really well. Watching the series during its original run even made me want to meet Cat so much, I wanted her to be a real person. Her character was brilliant and brought so much laughter to me when watching the series. But it's not just the role of Cat that makes me love Ariana. Her voice is incredible! From listening to some amazing songs like The Way, Bang Bang, Problem & Break Free, it just proves how amazing her voice is. Have a little listen for yourself and you are most likely to agree with me.

Just before Christmas 2016, Ariana took the role of Penny Pingleton in NBC's Hairspray Live! and like any acting job she takes, Ariana plays it perfectly well. Her verse in You Can't Stop The Beat is really enjoyable and you can't help but admire her collaboration with Dove Cameron (who is also in this TV Special) and Maddie Baillio for the song Mama, I'm A Big Girl Now. When watching the special, it's easy to see how much Ariana enjoyed playing the role of Penny and I much prefer her take on the character than the 2006 movie Penny. I can't help but love Ariana. So that concludes my Top 5 WCW. I'll do my best to post more on this blog since I do enjoy it but for now, thank you so much for spending time reading this and I hope you enjoyed it.

@josephsmithy101