#why do i have a knack for writing full novels in a single post?

[crowdvscritic]

round up // AUGUST 23

Well, it’s been a month. In August, I…

Quit a job

Started a new job

Went to the emergency room for two unplanned surgeries to remove my gallbladder

Celebrated a birthday

Yeesh, I’m exhausted just thinking about it, though not nearly as exhausted as I was just after surgery. My recovery has been steady, but it’s also been slow, which means little victories have included eating solid food and going a full day without napping. With that energy level, you can bet how I spent my short waking hours: watching a lot of movies! (I also read two books—I had some time!) My viewing in the two weeks at the hospital and recovering at home was a combo of Turner Classic Movies’ annual Summer Under the Stars celebration (with 24 hours of programming dedicated to classic movie stars like Stella Stevens, Jackie Cooper, and Greer Garson) and of comfort food faves (including ‘90s action flicks, ’00s rom-coms, and…Mary Kate and Ashley movies). You can see everything I watched in those two weeks on Letterboxd because between the sleepiness and pain meds, I needed a way to remember what was going on. I’m not sure what it says about me, but the idea of staying overnight in the hospital for the first time became a lot easier once I realized their cable packaged included TCM…

It’s also been four years. Yes, August marks both my birthday and the birthday of these Round Ups. In the last four years, I’ve rounded up…

6 stage shows

10 museums

14 concerts and events

15 series of Saturday Night Live sketches

20 podcasts

21 books

46 musical selections

49 TV shows

52 collections of articles, social media fun, and new movie trailers

421 movies 

Yes, I’m excited just thinking about all those Crowd and Critic selections, though my pace going forward will slow some. Going through so many life events in just a few weeks makes you take stock of how you’re spending your time and energy, and my motto is becoming, “If it ain’t easy, it better be worth it.” If I hate cooking, why do I make myself do it every week? And if writing a Round Up with 20 picks is challenging to squeeze in every month, then it’s time to make adjustments. Author Ingrid Fetell Lee summarized this philosophy well (and provided some practical suggestions) in her blog post “12 Ways to Be Gentle With Yourself” this month. In that spirit, Round Ups are becoming more exclusive as two Top Fives. Keep reading to see which movies, concert, book, album, and articles earned coveted this month's coveted spots...

August Crowd-Pleasers

1. Meg 2: The Trench (2023)

I could summarize the plot of this big dumb shark movie, but Bill Hader said it best on SNL: 

Since the trailer surprisingly didn’t give most of the best moments away, I’ll remain coy and just say I spent a lot of Jason Statham’s newest charisma-fest laughing out loud. Crowd: 9/10 // Critic: 6.5/10

2. Jonas Brothers: The Tour

68 songs! 5 albums! 1 night! As I have recommended Jonas content no fewer than four times in the last 4 years of these Round Ups, you should not be surprised to see this here. Like in 2019, I turned into an embarrassing fangirl freak at this show, singing along with every single song (though finding I really need to beef up on few Happiness Begins tracks) and shaking my sister with excitement every 15 minutes. (I think she was vibrating at the same energy? It's also possible she's just learned it's better to smile and nod when I'm like this.) The boys’ showmanship and knack for shelling out bops do not disappoint.

3. Romantic Comedy by Curtis Sittenfeld (2023)

A jaded comedy writer (basically Tina Fey) for a late night sketch show (basically Saturday Night Live) discovers a spark with a singer-songwriter rock star hosting an episode (basically John Mayer). So yes…this is an extreme overlap of my interests. Like SNL, this novel does at times lean into saucier and cruder content than I prefer, but the descriptions of the TV show’s behind-the-scenes process and of the relationship between a celebrity and a normie felt so authentic I had to Google Sittenfeld to see if these were based on her own experiences. The best part? A third of the book is a series of email exchanges in the style of You’ve Got Mail. Again, I told you it’s an extreme Venn diagram of my interests!

4. You Are So Not Invited to My Bat Mitzvah (2023) 

I mostly avoided Adam Sandler until 2020—somehow I’d only seen Happy Gilmore and Bedtime Stories before the pandemic. But since May of that year, I’ve watched 17 of them, and it’s time I finally just admit I’m an unironic fan of his, and now of his daughters, too! Bat Mitzvah is the update to Sixteen Candles we didn’t know we needed, and one of its pleasant surprises is Sandler is happy to stand back and watch his daughters shine (as Taylor Swift would say). His supporting role is the perfect choice for a comedy designed to launch his daughters’ Sunny and Sadie’s careers as leads, and Alison Peck’s sincere, funny script describes the pre-teen girl experience honestly. While there’s plenty of overlap with Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret., it’s not a rehash, which makes the pair a perfect double feature. Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 7/10

5. The Rocketeer (1991)

This action-adventure lives in the world we only imagine 1940s Hollywood to be, one where you could date an Errol Flynn-esque movie star (Timothy Dalton) after he notices you on set, one where you could accidentally find a rocket designed by Howard Hughes, and one where Bonnie and Clyde-style drive-by shoot-outs are everyday occurrences. With Billy Campbell, Jennifer Connelly, Alan Arkin, and a dash of the spirit of Indiana Jones, my only regret is I didn’t watch this years ago. Crowd: 10/10 // Critic: 8/10

More August Crowd-Pleasers: Elvis goes gaga in Hawaii for Girls! Girls! Girls! (1962), a musical comedy both corny and winning; Arnold Schwarzenegger goes ham on militants who kidnap his daughter in Commando (1985), an action flick both corny and thrilling; Michael J. Fox is a former child star who discovers a future child star in the comedy Life With Mikey (1993), the kind of family movie we don’t get enough of today; Sally Hawkins tells the true story of an amateur historian who discovered the remains of The Lost King (2022) Richard III in a drama with a fantastical twist; Paramount+ continues to abuse my nostalgia, but I continue to let them because Carly and Freddie are finally together in the third (and best) season of the iCarly reboot; like every Muny production, Sister Act was a blast on stage

August Critic Picks

1. Carole-thon!

Fun fact: Every Carole Lombard movie I’ve watched since starting this Round Up has become a monthly recommendation—why stop now? Lombard was TCM’s star of the day on August 18th, and it only took one viewing to realize I wanted to marathon everything on my DVR. Most of these titles are short and sweet screwball rom-coms, which means you can knock out quite a few of these in just an afternoon:

No Man of Her Own (1932) - Lombard falls for a con man (real-life future husband Clark Gable)—could she be the one to set him straight?

The Gay Bride (1934) - Lombard marries a gangster for his money, but her true love might be his second-in-command

Lady by Choice (1934) - Burlesque dancer Lombard “adopts” a mother for some positive PR, but she ends up getting more than she bargained for

Hands Across the Table (1935) - Lombard is a manicurist seeking a rich husband, but Manic Pixie Dream Boy Fred MacMurray throws a wrench in that plan 

The Princess Comes Across (1936) - Lombard is a con woman pretending to be a princess on an ocean liner, but her plans get tangled with another person's secrets (MacMurray)

True Confession (1937) - Lombard is a compulsive liar married to a compulsive truth-telling lawyer (MacMurray again) defending her for a murder she didn’t commit

Swing High, Swing Low (1937) - Lombard and MacMurry (for the last time) are musicians caught in a romantic, bi-continental melodrama

Fools for Scandal (1938) - The cutest little rom-com about a hotheaded American actress falling in love with an affable European fellow this side of Notting Hill!

In Name Only (1939) - Lombard and Cary Grant fight for their relationship even though his bitter wife won’t allow for a divorce

2. Executive Suite (1954)

1950s Glengarry Glen Ross! William Holden, Barbara Stanwyck, June Allyson, Fredric March, Walter Pidgeon, and Shelley Winters vie for the seat at the head of the executive table when the president suddenly dies, and together they create a summum bonum of character dramas. Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 9/10

3. No Secrets by Carly Simon (1972)

I know I’m the actual last person on Earth to realize the greatness of this album from a career that, among many accomplishments, paved the way for songwriters like Taylor Swift and Olivia Rodrigo. “You’re So Vain” is a banger with no less bite than 50 years ago, and the record is filled with gems start-to-finish.

4. Edge of Darkness (1943)

TCM’s August 5th star Errol Flynn and their August 28th star Ann Sheridan are fighting for their small fishing village, their families, and their love against brutal Nazi occupiers. I couldn't find comprehensive resources to clarify how much of this action-thriller is historically accurate (the novel it’s based on doesn’t even have a Wikipedia page!), but this gritty story of Norwegian resistance captures a similar spirit to some of the best World War II films, equal parts Indiana Jones and Casablanca. Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 9/10

5. Good Reads

#BillionGirlSummer: 

"It's #BillionGirlSummer: Taylor, Beyoncé and Barbie Made for One Epic Trifecta,” NPR.com (2023)

“Talking With ‘Swiftie Dads’ at a Taylor Swift Concert,” GQ.com (2023)

“Nearly 1 Out of 4 of ‘Barbie’ Viewers Hadn’t Gone to the Movies Since COVID,” IndieWire.com (2023)

Hollywood appears to be meeting a long-overdue reckoning: 

“The Binge Purge,” vulture.com (2023)

"Anonymous Strike Diary: ‘Our Souls Were Cracking … but Then the AMPTP F***ed Up,’” HollywoodReporter.com (2023)

“Orange Is the New Black Signalled the Rot Inside the Streaming Economy,” NewYorker.com (2023)

“Mandy Moore Says She Once Got a Check for a Penny for This Is Us Streaming Residuals,” HollywoodReporter.com (2023)

“David Zaslav, Hollywood Antihero,” NewYorker.com (2023)

Film history and criticism: 

“The 100 Best Movies of the Past 10 Decades,” TIME.com (2023)

“The Fate of the Critic in the Clickbait Age,” NewYorker.com (2017)

“The Instrumentalist,” NYBooks.com (2022)

“The Bradley Cooper “Jewface” Controversy Isn’t Really About That Nose,” slate.com (2023)

And a grab bag of worthwhile thoughts, interviews, and news: 

“Reese Witherspoon Is Starting a New Chapter,” HarpersBazaar.com (2023)

“To Help Cool a Hot Planet, the Whitest of White Coats,” NYTimes.com (2023)

“Beyoncé, Tumblr, and ‘Harlem Shake’: Revisiting Pop’s Most Pivotal Year,” TheDailyBeast.com (2023)

“Elon Musk’s Shadow Rule,” NewYorker.com (2023)

“Why You Rarely Believe Celebrity Apologies on Social Media,” BBC.com (2023)

More August Critic Picks: The kid-and-his-dog dramedy about one of the goodest doggos who ever did live, Tough Guy (1936), hits you right in the heart; Errol Flynn thrills again in a search for sunken treasure that might claim his soul in Mara Maru (1952)

Also in August…

The world’s slowest Best Picture Project continues with 1942’s Mrs. Miniver, a genuinely moving piece of war propaganda. Read my Crowd and Critic reviews.

Until September wraps, you can follow what I’m watching creating lists for on Letterboxd. In August, I updated my rankings of 2023 product movie rankings and Christopher Nolan films by Dead Wife Energy, and I also found some weird overlaps between the August releases Blue Beetle and Meg 2 (warning: spoilers!).

Photo credits: Jonas Brothers, Romantic Comedy, Carly Simon, Good Reads. All others IMDb.com.

[nice-kill-tanaka]

🌄Hikaru + Tease Crush🌌

Summary: Aaaa idk tsundere hikaru brain go brrrrrr,.

A/N: Lowkey, I’m not too sure about this one. But, how good it is comes down to how well it’s received by you guys. It’s in your hands now tumblr!!

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🌗Hikaru Hitachiin🌗

You, a new second year at Ouran Middle School, happened to meet Hikaru and Kaoru in a once in a blue moon situation

✨Separately✨

You and your parents were commoners from another region of Japan. But, due to trying times, you were sent to live with your impossibly wealthy grandparents to finish your education while your parents got back on their feet

So, you clearly had no idea how to navigate what felt like the world’s biggest campus

Taking initiative, you decided to take a free period to mentally map out at least the middle school campus. You were not about to be late to every single class again, lest you start getting detention

You were somewhere near the courtyard when you heard soft, delicate sobs from around the corner, followed by fast footsteps leading away from you

You quickened your pace to at least see what was going on, and the scene you walked in on told you everything you needed to know

The sobs were coming from a girl in your year, who seemed eager to get away from the courtyard. And leaning on the pillar on the bend, was a tall redhead who looked far too satisfied with himself. At least if your assumptions were correct

You decided not to go off on the boy right away, so you wouldn’t embarrass yourself

“Ah...Did I intrude on something?”

The boy apparently hadn’t noticed you until you said something, but quickly regained his composure

“Nah, you had good timing. We were just finishing up.”

“...We?”

Hikaru suddenly remembered

You were new to Ouran. And at this point, you probably haven’t memorized faces yet. Even if they were identical

That, and the fact that Kaoru was still behind a bush watching everything play out, was enough for Hikaru to try something new

“Me and that girl you saw, I mean.”

“Yeah, alright. What’s your deal with her, by the way? She didn’t sound too happy.”

Hikaru shrugged, “Dishonesty, disloyalty, stuff like that. I just gave her a piece of my mind and she couldn’t handle it.”

“Hm, I figured she couldn’t. She’s crying pretty hard.”

“Then she shouldn’t have been trying to sneak around with other guys.”

Alright...you halfway understood the guy. If you were in his shoes, you’d at least want to do something similar. But, going out of your way to emotionally decimate someone that clearly isn’t worth your time? Seems a little excessive

‘But, hey,’ you thought. ‘To each their own.’

You kept your composure around the boy, shrugging and turning to walk away. “I get that. What did you say your name was?”

“Mm? Hikaru.”

“Hikaru. If that girl’s really as horrible as you say she is, I think it’s hilarious that you’d give her pathetic ass the time of day.”

That jab technically wasn’t aimed at Hikaru, but the way you said it. The way you turned back slightly to flash a shit-eating grin at him. It was clear your comment was meant to say more about Hikaru than the girl he told off

In short, Hikaru ended up not liking you

Meeting Kaoru went a bit more smoothly

Since you were in Class B at the time (you were to transfer to Class A next semester), you didn’t actually gather that the asshole you met the other day had a whole brother. So, that case of whiplash was particularly strong

During a lunch period within the same year, you decided to sit alone. Nothing personal really, but being around twenty-four other kids your age with such a high amount of tunnel vision gets suffocating at a certain point

Not too far away, Hikaru had gotten up to use the bathroom, leaving Kaoru to his own devices for a bit

It wasn’t long before he found a familiar face in you, sitting alone and looking rather bored

Of course, Kaoru hadn’t personally talked to you yet. The only things he heard about you were from Hikaru, which still wasn’t much, considering that his brother seemed too embarrassed and pissed to say anything beyond: “They’re an asshole. They’re not worth talking to.”

But, regardless of Hikaru’s first impression of you, Kaoru thought it would be fun to mess with you for a bit

I’m fully convinced you have the eagle eye, because you noticed Kaoru before he even said anything

“If you’re still pressed about what I said the other day, Hikaru, trust me, I was just messing with you.”

Damn at least let him speak 💀

Kaoru noticed that even though you thought he was Hikaru, your posture and tone held no animosity. You seemed relaxed, even sending a half smile Kaoru’s way

Your aura felt overall likable, so what could you have said to Hikaru to tick him off so much??

“Oh, don’t worry about it. I actually almost forgot about that.”

Immediately, something didn’t click with you

“You sound different today, man. Everything okay?”

...What??

Kaoru wasn’t sure how you figured it out, but no one was usually able to tell the difference between his and Hikaru’s voices and speech patterns, period. Let alone upon hearing both twins once separately

“What do you mean...? I’ve always sounded like this?”

“Hm, must be a bad case of laryngitis then. How’s your twin doing, by the way?”

Kaoru’s expression didn’t betray much, but your knowing and lighthearted smile sure did

He originally wasn’t going to tell you the whole truth. But, you seemed like you’d be too much fun (given some time) to pass up getting on your good side!

It almost felt strange, inviting someone else into his and Hikaru’s little world. But, even if you were just a toy for now, you were someone Kaoru wanted to keep around 

Kaoru introduced himself with his real name while he explained his relationship with Hikaru, and your face was priceless

Sure, you knew that the boy in front of you wasn’t acting like the Hikaru you met a few days back. But, the twin brother thing was a complete shot in the dark!!

But, Kaoru laughed and dragged you and your lunch to his and Hikaru’s table

Ooh, when I say Hikaru was NOT thrilled??

He was seething when you gave him that same look as before

“Hey there, Heartbreaker. Nice to see you again.” 😊😊🙃🙃

Hikaru flushed as Kaoru tried to hide his giggles behind his hand

Yeah, that kind of sums up your dynamic 😂

From then on, whenever you were around the twins, you drove a clear wedge in their “identical” personalities. Just by the fact that you treated them both differently

Kaoru was your partner in crime, playing along with your jokes and often taking more agency in making decisions than usual. You were both mature, yet mischievous, so you were often on the same page

We stan compatible friends 👏😌

Hikaru...was kind of your sentient punching bag

From your first conversation with him to now, you gathered that Hikaru had a weirdly prominent petty streak, with some emotional constipation on the side. All of this, manifesting in a semi-childish, stubborn mess with a hair-trigger temper (At least, when it comes to you and Kaoru poking at him)

You weren’t exactly intent on improving those flaws (Since it’s technically not your job to fix the vices of others), but you most certainly let Hikaru know that those qualities weren’t something to be proud of. Especially when he let them get the better of him

And you did just that by teasing the hell out of him

“Aww, is little Hikaru upset that Italian isn’t being served at lunch today??”

“Ooh, don’t get too angry! You might pop a vein.”

“Y’know, you’d think a normal human being wouldn’t blush as much as you do. Are you really that bothered by me?”

Yes! He was!

He felt bothered and threatened because you dragged out every single flaw that no one (not even Kaoru) dared to call out until now. Not that he could give a name to that feeling an the moment

You were surprisingly clairvoyant for someone that strategically abused that fact. You always had an upper hand, and that wasn’t something Hikaru was used to

But, after a while, his frequent showcases of embarrassment began happening for a different reason

In between all of the teasing, you were never downright mean to Hikaru. You were just as nice to him as you were to Kaoru

Hikaru often enjoyed the bentos you made the twins on random days (Though, he failed to admit it on a regular basis)

When the teacher was going a little too fast, you’d always let Hikaru copy off of your notes

And man, you sure did look good at the beginning of the day...when the morning sun lights up your eyes, and-

Oh...

Oh no.

So, that’s why every time you’d get on Hikaru’s case, he would get flustered and look away. He liked you??

Hikaru can’t let anyone know about this. Especially you.

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[🌌Take this for your travels, bud. Don’t worry about paying me or anything, everything’s on the house! Though 🍁likes🍁 and ☘️reblogs☘️ are appreciated!🌄] — Reagan

[devoverest]

Getting to know me: a novel

@ignisgalaxia @imaginationdrift @bizships @lodessa and @streepmulgrew  have all tagged me for this, and I just can't take the peer pressure any longer. However, I'm so long-winded everyone will surely be very sorry that you five ever asked me. I will try very hard to put most of this below a "read more" link, but my mobile app doesn't play nicely with that feature any longer, so I truly deeply and sincerely apologize if yours doesn't either and you get a callus scrolling past all of what follows on your way to the gifsets you're on Tumblr to enjoy.

1. Relationship status: married -- legally and everything. It was the mid-'90s. I was considering having a religious ceremony but forgoing the state-recognized marriage license part, in solidarity with same-sex couples who at the time and for many years afterward were denied that privilege. However, my father absolutely put his foot down (something he almost never did with me, especially in my young adulthood) and insisted on the marriage license. He supported marriage equality, but he was thinking of my economic security in case our marriage didn't last. He was right to do, as I ended up taking many years out of the paid workforce to raise children, which I hadn't planned on doing when I decided to marry.

In case Tumblr is stupid, right here is where I’ve inserted a “read more” link as I’m writing this post. I tried. 

2. Lipstick or chapstick: Usually neither. Actually, never literal Chapstick because that stuff is made out of petroleum and isn't good for your skin. I learned that when I was playing a lot of flute in high school and college and had to take extra special care of my lips to play well. If the weather gets really cold and dry, which it rarely does where I live, and if I can hang on to any of the half-dozen tubes I buy every year but which invariably get swiped and then lost by family members, I use a Burt's Bees lip balm. I seem to have a knack for finding them barely-used in the bottom of my purse during the warm months and then never having one at hand when I actually need it. I think I own one lip pencil currently and I'll sometimes use that to outline my lips when I'm doing some sort of special-event public speaking kinda gig but I don't wear any make-up normally. My husband claims that I knew full well it was a date the first time we got together socially because I wore make-up. I have never admitted to him that he is correct, but he is.

3. Three favorite foods: Too many to narrow down to just three. I enjoy and appreciate a wide range of foods. Things I enjoy and appreciate perhaps a tad more frequently than I ought to in the strictest interests of nutrition are chocolate in almost any form, ice cream (especially that of the chocolate persuasion and most especially any form of peanut-butter/chocolate), and Starburst brand jellybeans, which my son and I share somewhat ritualistically most evenings after dinner (which is somehow not the same thing as for dessert.) Why yes, I do have a sweet tooth -- why do you ask?

4. Song stuck in your head: Currently "You Ain't Seen Nothing Yet" by Bachman-Turner Overdrive (I had to google that.) I don't know why but suspect it was on TV this evening, which makes me fear that it may be the campaign song for some politician I would never vote for. Which reminds me -- US citizens, please double-check that you are registered to vote and make a plan for voting in the upcoming midterms! This will probably the most important election of your entire lifetime, past or future, no matter what your age, and in many races in many states, voter turnout will be the single deciding factor in who controls the future of our country for a very long time to come. Please vote!

5. Last movie you watched: "Crazy Rich Asians," with my husband, unwisely just two days after I had minor (but surprisingly butt-kicking) surgery. We went to the first matinee showing on a Saturday and actually arrived at the theater before it even opened, a sure sign of mature middle age if I've ever heard of one. We both loved the film -- it was glitzy, funny, extremely well-written and -acted, got all the Chinese cultural details right, offered caricatures but no stereotypes, was very female-centric and multi-generational, and of course starred the exquisite and inimitable Michelle Yeoh who also plays Philippa Georgiou on Star Trek: Discovery. Laughed until my belly hurt (literally, sadly) and then went home and slept the rest of the day.

6. Top three shows: This will sound really strange for someone who is on Tumblr because of TV show fandom, but I don't watch TV. I grew up with Star Trek TOS reruns and movies, then TNG in college & grad school, then Voyager until extended stays abroad made it impossible to keep up with (back in the days before streaming and VPNs.) I reconnected with Star Trek in summer 2017 when I was home alone for six weeks and binged all of Voyager and then started digging up fanfic for all the reasons all the Voyager fans turn to fic -- to fix what the show's writers mutilated -- and now here I am, but I don't watch TV, and when I do it's the nightly news or whatever sports my husband is watching and then it's just because I feel like sitting in the same room with my husband at that particular time. The one exception to this fact about me is that I did watch Star Trek: Discovery as it was being released last year, and even got my teenager into it. (He is a Netflix addict but never watched any Star Trek anything before that. I don't know where I went wrong with this child.)

7. Books I'm currently reading: Eternal Tide by Kirsten Beyer because @voyager-book-club; Ancillary Justice by Ann Leckie (audiobook but I'm counting it); Five Ways to Forgiveness by Ursula K. LeGuin, Soul at Work: Spiritual Leadership in Organizations by Margaret Benefiel; Pachinko by Min Jin Lee; and Selecting and Using Breastfeeding Tools: Improving Care and Outcomes by Catherine Watson Genna. Except that the last three books on the list are ones I have at hand and keep wanting to read but haven't so much as opened yet. But including them gives you a more complete sense of my interests.

8. Last thing I googled: "you ain't seen nothing yet lyrics" because #4 above. Before that, "instant pot beef stew recipe." No need to look further back in my search history (she said during a break from writing smut.) *whistles innocently*

9. Time: 10:30pm as I write this. No idea when I'll post it or when you'll read it. This seems like a silly question to include for a post of this nature.

10. Dream trip: India. But I've also never crossed the equator and really feel I should someday, so who knows, maybe I'll find a way to drop in on all the Australian friends I've made in Voyager fandom. Now wouldn't that be lovely?

11. Anything you want: Anyone who knows me in real life (and anyone hanging around the Voyager Book Club discord server) knows I never shut up about breastfeeding support and advocacy. But I always try to make it clear that I'm not preaching at parents about how they should feed their babies; rather, I'm working to help parents who want to breastfeed overcome any challenges they encounter. I save my preaching for the folks involved with policy and institutional barriers to breastfeeding, and when it comes to the unethical and demonstrably harmful advertising practices of the infant formula industry, my preaching leans hard toward the hellfire and damnation variety because that is some truly evil shit, folks -- the advertising practices, not the formula milk itself; let's be very, very clear about that.

Rules: Tag 15 people you want to get to know better.

Here I shall echo @imaginationdrift: "(Really?! That sounds like a number chosen by an extroverted maven.) / Ok, here goes. / FEEL FREE TO: never complete this. I won’t be disappointed, promise." Also, apologies to those who have already responded -- feel even freer to ignore. 

@garrulus  @rikerssexblouse  @klugtiger  @ussjellyfish  @kate-coleman-writes  @lameraextranjera  @armitagetrekkie  @warp6  @admiralkatcornwellfan @zjofierose  @writtenndust @trekkiefeminist @quirkette100 @nerdfishgirl @hoidn

[weirdness-on-the-roof]

critical role episode 48 campaign 2 notes and funny lines post break edit:this has detailed notes on all the stuff that happened later in the episode including physical descriptions near the end. enjoy ya nerds

don’t steal the books from a high powered mage; don’t kill the dude; beau turning into cad; look at beau planning for the future

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is marisha flirting with matt via matt playing yasha and beau flirting with yasha?

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‘tea the international language’ but no earl grey

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wensworth the goblin

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coming from Cad ‘im a fine tea maker’ is kinda a threat tbh

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elf that isn’t white/European??? yay! also really old elves are cool

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beau and cad tag teaming a political chat with a mage this can’t end poorly

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Nott: :beau ruins every situation shes in and is very abrasive

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send the freaking cat!!! why not?? caleb my dude

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god i miss allura and gilmore currently

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fucking fuck don’t lie to the mage beau plz stop this is painful ‘you’re not wrong’ sure blame the ancient sea god

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‘on the verge of returning’ yea no duh you let him out 2/3 of the way so fjord could get a spell

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‘we found a thing’ so smooth and eloquent beau ‘it was presented to us as the happy fun time ball’

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‘butter fingers with magical items’

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beau getting a geography lesson from a very old powerful elven mage

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‘magical geometric orb that has the ability to bend time and space and fate’ which is kept in a hot pink magic bag that happened to ‘fall into [their] lap’

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‘if youre down im down is what im saying... i have a few slots open in my loyalty bank if you’re willing to pay rent’ says the 20 some human who punches things to the centuries old wizard ‘

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liam stress eating

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cad’s hope in the group is heartwarming

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tower metaphors and a conversation!!!

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caleb reading shitty romance novel and nott eating a fish outside a mage’s tower in the morning sunlight in a major city

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caleb takes the rear

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first name drop and a while

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holy shit 200 years of magic using

-------

cad explaining materialistic nature of the rest of the party to elf dude is hilarious

-------

teleportation circles?????? in return for access to the sphere!! oh shit thats good

-------

or candy

-------

crap. no one has insight checked this dude and they gave him the happy fun ball and made a deal kinda.

-------

‘how do we prove our loyalty?’ ‘by not fucking me over’ sounds like a good plan

-------

is this guy just caleb’s patron now on the low idk this is how my head works and he said learn

-------

“you have a geometric shape that makes babies?” “yea they talked about that”

-------

fjord just kills the dude

-------

‘i got banishment on hold just in case’ *cackling laughter*

-------

i agree with elf dude, him not knowing anything about the dodecha is more concerning than him knowing about it

-------

ALL THE CITIES FROM CR1 MENTIONED FOR THE FIRST TIME!!! I STILL MISS ALLURA AND GILMORE

-------

good to know the pink bag protects from divination on this plane but just this one

-------

jester and the traveler figurine

-------

cad included the Traveler in the ‘chaotic forces’ i still think the traveler is some kinda arch fey evil things idk its real late here and this is incoherent

-------

‘well, thats been my morning tea‘ 

-------

caleb getting additional tour

-------

good aesthetic for the room tbh

-------

letting weird people in for morning tea is entertainment is a mood and something i strive to be able to do without getting murdered one day

-------

so yasha and caleb both have gotten the ‘stay with friends’ chat from a powerful being which is nice. but also the ‘use who you need to’ going to caleb is vaguely concerning

-------

personalized biscuits [bourbon, cinnamon, lobster, fish and three unknowns]

-------

‘caleb, what happened in there?’

-------

cad not believing caleb’s bullshit and opening doors for caleb warms my heart

-------

‘if this isn’t the death of us, and if not hes a good ally. somethings gonna be the death of us so [yolo]’

-------

‘you can’t bullshit everyone in this world’

-------

cad talking about beau telling the truth: ‘you’re not very good at it but you tried

-------

jester looking out for nott and her home town

-------

caleb and beau being cute while also giving each other shit is the most sibling like thing

-------

omg going back to allfield that was so long ago for fucks sake BRYCE my person thank god

-------

jester had a boy band phase its cannon and i think the girls had a sleepover in jester’s old room. also marion never leaves the hotel. THE RUBY NECKLACE MY HEART AND THE HONEY AWWWWW

‘the army of men and women and inbetween that will do as i want them to’ god i adore her being protective of jester

-------

also the fact matt makes such a good mom why is he like this

-------

travel time!!!! ‘roll for initiative’-tal

-------

how does matt keep these notes so organized and remember all the npc names

-------

the ranger/beast master in Laura is coming out with nugget

-------

caleb is a devout cat person and jester is the definition of a dog person

-------

nott refining oil on a magical moving cart, while jester reads a romance novel and trains a dog,

-------

Dyren- Beau’s roommate at colbot souls; ‘taught beau lots of really cool things’ got sent to a warfront. shaved head, dark clothes, buff b/c ‘been workin out’, ‘do you love her?’ they had ‘good times’, then literal booty call, and dropping locations, Dyren was in Bladegarden. ‘fierce eyebrows, pointed nose’

                    OH MY GOD THEY WERE ROOMMATES

-------

Vandren info drop to Fjord ‘he was making amends’

-------

Dyren responded and was hurt in Bladegarden but is safe. Beau looked immediately worried and happy about jester’s imput [’sounded way into you’]

-------

empire kids chat and caleb admitting insecurities about powerful people and being scared about the consequences of his actions and the group’s actions. caleb is scared about being forced to leave for safety and being ‘flayed alive’. my thoughts are he would leave if he became a threat to the others by being there or vise versa. trent would extort that b/c hes a dick

“caleb, unfortunately, you don’t get to choose who cares for you” you’re fucking correct Beau

“the problem with friends is that you have to care for them”

walks away “wow cool caleb! see- jester thinks you’re cool because shes your fucking friend!”

me too Tal “everything i like about those two characters in one conversation”

-------

5 years since Caleb left Trent and crew ie had a nervous breakdown

-------

gustav left town after being freed and trostenwald now has a WV accent that is too familiar

-------

100 extra soldiers in allfield. bryce is still up and kicking and wonderful. stuff ‘got this far east [quickly]’. the attacks came from underground apparently so fuck. the fields were burned, building destroyed a bit then they [Xhorhasians] left

“good thing is they’ve already been attacked so lightning doesn’t strike twice” oof thanks bryce

-------

beau just dead ass asking for illegal writing statements

-------

fjord having a thank u jesus bryce moment

-------

jester giving cad a pretty present is ‘so exciting’ and precious

-------

Cad not knowing cookbooks were a thing!!! and not being utterly literate enough to understand it

-------

wtf happened to liam’s voice in the ‘main export is oysters’ thing

-------

FELDERWEN!!!!!

-------

a dozen squads of 50 ppl each patrolling felderwen area so rippppp

-------

Nott knows where the halfing’s house is.... interesting... and is heavily drinking

-------

BLUE FLASH

elven woman in fine clothes of green and black ----lady vest durogna the arch mage of antiquity serboros assembly

a male figure in deep blue robes, older pale elf, fine clothes, the flash came from him----- martinette luden’th de____ arch mage of domestic protection

CALEB KNOWS THEM BOTH FROM THE ACADEMY AHHHHHH

he just lays flat and hides in the cart internally: ‘nopenopenopenope’

-------

several burned buildings, a warehouse, an inn, apothecary and several houses

-------

ohhhh shit the halfling was the owner of the apothecary and nott was looking for the shit she had been sending back this whole adventure....... im sad now that was confirmed

havent found a body of yeza

luke is yeza’s son at old edith’s house

            halflings only produce halflings according to something i read at some point but forget where sooooooooo

shattered vials and materials and house stuff

CHILDREN'S TOYS

locked basement which nott knows of?? Nott is anxious and impatient when the door doesn’t open. jester fails, yasha rages and at a 19 and doesn’t break the door. ‘it wasn’t [trapped]’ but dispel magic worked to open it.

a 15′x15′ room, tossed ‘not like you remember’ to nott, a 2x3 iron chest. a single chair in the center of the room. definitely a struggle with heavy impacts and blade scratched on wall

             nott was the torturer from the goblin tribe

chair was placed in the spot after the struggle

this was where he [yeza] kept chemicals according to nott

poisoned iron locked box (dull black glass)  inside a retractable silver tripod to hold something atop it, 3 empty vials 1 full one with a liquid/gas fog like dull colored thing, a pile of destroyed notes [two pieces of still legible paper which have props]

            dunamous field, causes ppl slow to be slower or faster, ‘captured crin operatives’ dunaments and dunamacy, origon gliffs, exist outside established schools of magic, theory in deeply rooted in arcana taken for granted, rooted in _____ town, 12-16 months to refine, word has found me that trent’s kiddos have knacks for this things, dreams are thrilling

well shittttt

            crin on battle fields, ‘breaking fields of fate, fuck the raven queen

SHIIIIIT

a piece of dunemous

dodecha goes in tripod according to beau

chair facing chest

-------

cricks did this apparently

a little under 100 crowns guard killed, 4 civilians burned

soldiers just ‘slowed down’ 

left via tunnels and collapsed them behind them

-------

nott dont be a bitch and don’t get mad at caleb and call them ‘his people’

-------

cad picks up caleb and ‘youre not at fault here, youre the solution here. don’t let her anger... its not about you’

my HEART

-------

the chest is too big for the haver sack but fits in lorenzo’s bag of holding

-------

people have entered and exited since the attack and left the chair and stuff

-------

lots ‘o chairs

-------

nott needs to see ledith and uke (?) and not flip the fuck out

‘humble hobble’

nott looked like halfling plump face, braids, tan skin

edith- human older, grey hair, beady eyes, ever present smile like face

          LUKE IS HER SON!!!!!!!!!!!!!! CANNON

         *edit- rewatching this and seeing ever one’s faces “wheres my son?!” particularly laura/liam/travis just hurt. liam just looked up after a second and travis did his face he does and laura just stiffened and eyes and hand to face. caleb/liam who knows just hugs himself the rest of the convo. marisha is note taking and fuck the video off now

about 5 yrs old, blue eyes, tan/light brown skin, halfling

gave him the doll of the king

IM GONNA CRY NOW BYE

‘HES PROABLY DEAD NOW TOO LIKE I THOUGHT YOU WER’

yenza locks him away when ‘the mean lady comes by’

mean lady has pointy ears and comes often, luke was kept in room, luke was pushed out of the house and told to go somewhere safe so he ran to edith’s house and ‘everything was on fire’

‘im not strong enough to come back yet but know that [im stll thinking of you and i send things] and i hope dad sends them to you.“ fuck my heart

“in my heart i think he is” “well don’t die”

-------

the elves are gong to the ruins of yenza’s house

-------

marisha looked so betrayed

tal ‘i was waiting for the riegel shoe to drop’

WOW

HEY CALEB- WOOOW

-------

we’ll pick up hiiiere

fuck you sam and matt and everything abou this my heart is just FUCKKK

ummm so enjoy the frantic poorly taken notes <3

[yaaahbaekhyun]

WRITER’S BLOCK (1)

Genre: Fluff / Angst / Smut 

Pairing: BaekhyunxOC

Summary: You were an aspiring writer looking for new ideas for your first ever novel. It wasn’t easy as you thought it would be considering the writer’s block you always seem to have. Just when you were on the brink of giving up an inspiration came out of nowhere. An inspiration that goes by the name of “Byun Baekhyun”

A/N: Okay! I know, I still have another Baek story to finish but I just wanted to post this one since it had been in my drafts for a long time lmao I hope y'all support this one as well! And also!!! It’s my first time writing smut so please tell what y’all think hehe 

I REVISED THE SMUT I HOPE Y’ALL LIKE IT! ENJOY!!!

You gulped down your coffee to the last drop. It was your second cup for the night. You were currently seated in front of your study table, fingers lingering on the keys of the laptop. The blank page of the untitled word document glaring at you, mocking you.

You heaved a sigh.

You got out of college 8 months ago. No, you are not a graduate. You decided to drop out 2 months into the school year out of impulse. It wasn’t because you were stupid or anything, it was just because you lack any kind of motivation for studying and plus, you didn’t think you’d need any of what they offer in school for your dream job. You aspire to be a best-selling novelist.

Your parents weren’t against it, but they weren’t really supportive of the idea either. They just let you do what you want since it’s your life. They would sometimes try offering you financial support or ask you to come back home so you would have less expenses but you were a strong independent woman who doesn’t need to live off of her parents money (and truth be told, you were kinda embarrassed and you wanted to prove something to them).

“Ahhhhhh fuck me,” You cursed under your breath. You just wanted to write but this writer’s block always seem to have kept you company. Every time you tried starting on a story, you’d end up clueless on where the storyline was heading so you were always back to square one: and that is struggling to find a solid plot until the wee hours of the night. Who would’ve known your dream would be this hard to attain?

Looking at the clock, you realized that it was already 4 in the morning. You aren’t going to be able to write anything again, you deduced. You needed to rest since tomorrow was Friday. It was your last working day and your shift starts at 9 am. You couldn’t wait for the weekend to roll so you could focus more on your writing (or more like staring at your laptop and and having a mental breakdown).

You recently found work in a coffee shop near your apartment building. It was also near a university which was why it was always flocking with students. The pay was good, it was enough to keep you fed and off the streets. But you weren’t going to settle down with that kind of job. You were going to put Stephen King, J.K Rowling, and John Green to shame! You were gonna go places! But as of now, the only place you can afford is the small gloomy apartment you’re living in.

Taking off your glasses, you stood up from your chair. You almost fell because your legs were numb, like thousands of tiny ants were biting them. This was probably because you spent hours in the same sitting position.

You sighed again.

As you laid down on your bed, thoughts about your life choices entered your mind. You were really contemplating now whether it was a right choice to pursue a writing career. You were just so so close on giving up.

You didn’t get any sleep that night.

“Hey there buttercup, why the long face?” Sehun said when he joined you behind the counter while putting on his apron.

Sehun was your coworker. You take turns on managing the counter and serving customers. You also help each other on kitchen duty. You’ve only known him for 2 months but it felt like you’ve known him for years. When you two met, you just instantly clicked.

Unlike you though, Sehun was only working part time. He was studying Visual Arts in the university near the coffee shop. Sehun didn’t need to work for money, that much you’ve learnt. When you asked why he was working, he told you the sole purpose was to “hone his interpersonal skills”.

He was a really good-looking man, you actually had a crush on him on your first day of work but when you overheard him calling someone “baby” on the phone, you knew he was off limits. He even showed you a picture of his girlfriend. Son Eunbi. Cute petite girl. Short brown hair that falls midway on her long beautiful neckline. She probably has a great personality too, you thought. Sehun even said he’d let you meet her. Next time, you would say.

“I just didn’t get much sleep is all.” You replied, leaving out the part where you couldn’t type in a single sentence on your laptop 5 hours ago.

“How’s writing?” He asked voice sounding genuinely curious.

“Ugh. Don’t even ask.”

“Writer’s block still won’t let up?”

You nodded tiredly and he gave you an apologetic smile.

“Maybe this writing thing isn’t for me.” You said while you continued brewing coffee.

“Maybe I was meant to be a coffee expert. Or a coffee police. Hands in the air! You are selling bad coffee! .....Or something like that.” You jested but half meant it. If it was the you months ago, giving up wouldn’t be an option. But considering your current state, it looks like giving up is the only option.

“Hey don’t say that, sugarplum.” You rolled your eyes playfully at his endearment. He had a knack of calling you these weird nicknames because he finds it amusing.

“I think you just need a little break.” He added, appearing at your side, leaning against the counter.

“Tell you what, there’s going to be a party tomorrow at my friend’s house. He throws the most turnt up parties ever like seriously! The unlimited booze, horny fuckers grinding up against each other, deafening music, and all the made up games just to have an excuse to drink and make out….” He smiled at you.

“And you’re coming with me.”

He didn’t even ask you if you’d want to come, he already decided for you. You chuckled. Typical Sehun.

“Well, I have been so uptight lately.” He nodded in agreement.

“And I do need some kind of relief….” 

“Yeah and this would be a really great way to loosen up. Maybe you’d even find something to write about in the party- Oh! Eunbi will be there too! You’ll finally get to meet her!” He exclaimed looking so excited.

“Alright. This better be a hella turnt up party, Oh Sehun.”

“Don’t worry, hotdog. Jongdae never disappoints.” He winked.

The bells chime as a customer walks in, signaling the start of your busy day.

Saturday came faster than you thought. You finished dolling up and you were just waiting for Sehun to come and get you. You insisted that you’d just arrive on the venue by yourself but being the stubborn Sehun he is, he insisted on going together.

You were checking yourself out in the mirror when your eyes suddenly drifted to your study table, laptop untouched.

You shook your head. No, you were not going to think about that right now. Today is going to be consist of full blown make out sessions with strangers and going home with them, pissed drunk.

“Fuck writing! I’m getting dick tonight!” You said to yourself with new found determination. Just then, there was a knock on your door.

You opened it and was greeted by a very stunning man.

“Wow, you look like someone who’d get laid.” Sehun whistled lowly while he eyed you, a lopsided smirk playing on his lips. “Because that’s what I intend to do, get laid. Now shut up and bring me where the party at, lover boy!” You marched towards the lift.

“Eager, aren’t we?” He chuckled and followed suit.

Sehun’s girlfriend came in to view as you approached his car. She smiled at you and you smiled back with the same warmth she was emitting.

“Hi, you must be Y/N. I heard a lot about you from Sehun.” She said holding out a hand to you.

“And you must be the famous Son Eunbi. I can say the reverse is true, too.” You grinned and shook her hand.

You three chatted for the whole ride. You were already liking Eunbi and it was apparent that she was also growing comfortable with you too.

When you arrived at the house party, everyone was already under the influence of alcohol and blasting music. Everywhere you look, there would be people grinding up against each other, grabbing asses and are just practically fucking in front of your very eyes.

It looked wilder than any party you have been to.

Sehun appeared next to you and put his arm around your shoulder. He took in a deep breath and spoke, “Ahhhhhhh nothing but the smell of drunken regrets……so, what’ya think boobear?” 

“This is going to be so fucking lit.”

You move your way to the kitchen to refill your cup. You have been dancing and making out with almost every boy at the party. Everyone seemed to want to get their hands on you, probably because you’re fresh meat in their eyes.

As you reached the kitchen, Sehun was mixing bright color liquids in his cup. He turned his head towards you and he had a sheepish smile on his face. It was evident that he’s drunk since he was a little red and you knew he wouldn’t drink that if he was in his right state of mind. That drink in his hand screamed “Death”

“Where’s Eunbi?” You asked when you reached him.

“Just chatting with some of her friends.” He shrugged and you nod in understanding.

“How are you feeling?” 

“Never been better! This is a really good way of loosening up. I feel so great!” You beamed at him which caused him to laugh. You were more bouncy and animated than usual, all the alcohol you drank making its way through your system.

As you were filling your cup with who-knows-what, your eyes scanned the living room to look for a new victim.

Your eyes landed on the boy on the couch with a girl sitting on his lap, casually conversing with another boy beside him.

The girl was rubbing circles on his chest sensually and sometimes would even kiss the base of his neck but he didn’t seem to be fazed by it because the conversation they were having didn’t stop.

“Who’s the guy?” You asked Sehun. He followed your line of vision and smirked slyly when he saw who you were looking at.

“Ahhhh that my dear, is the Byun Baekhyun. He’s an art major like me. He’s in some of my classes but I never really talked to the guy, he doesn’t look like someone who’d want casual talk. He’s really famous in school for his art works and his cocky personality. Though I must warn you before you plan on doing anything stupid, Baek’s a huge playboy. Rumor’s had it he even had an orgy with the most popular girls in our school and he was the only boy there.” Sehun chuckled at that and raised his cup. “Salute.”

You digested everything Sehun was saying while you took in Baekhyun’s appearance. His raven black hair was messed perfectly, bed hair but it looked like all the strands stuck out to the right places the moment he got out of bed. He was wearing a silk navy blue button up that was impractically unbuttoned halfway, revealing his smooth chest. He looked like a fucking man whore but he made it look fashion. 

“Typical artistic playboy.” You murmured, taking a swig from your cup.

“I wouldn’t say typical….there’s really more than meets the eye with that guy.” And just as Sehun said the word eye, Baekhyun shifted his gaze in your direction, making eye contact. Your heart skipped a beat but not in the way you want it to.

He was from across the room and the way he was looking left your mouth slightly agape. He had a smug look on his face while he raised his cup to your direction. Coming back to your senses, you did the same. He then returned his attention to the guy he was talking to.

Byun Baekhyun has definitely piqued your interest.

He looked fine as hell and all you wanted in that moment was to be that girl on his lap. You’ve made up your mind. Byun Baekhyun was your next target.

“Hey Sehun! Aren’t you going to introduce me to your cute friend over here?” A guy called out to the tall man sitting beside you. You recognize him as the guy Baekhyun was talking to earlier. You were currently on the couch where they were sitting a while ago. When they left, you and Sehun headed there and Eunbi joined soon after.

“Oh hey! This is Y/N, Y/N this is Jongdae, the one who’s throwing the party.” Sehun said. Jongdae smiled at you cheekily and held out a hand. You took it and he kissed the back of it. You giggled at that which made Sehun gag. 

“Well before I throw up at you guys, I’m gonna dance with my girlfriend now so if you may excuse us.” Sehun said while he stood up, pulling an obviously wasted Eunbi to the dance floor.

“How about you? Wanna dance?” Jongdae offered with a glint of mischief in his eyes. This boy seriously looks like he is always up to no good. You agreed nonetheless, the alcohol in your system deciding for you.

You ended up on the center of the dance floor, your chest pressed up against Jongdae’s considering how a lot of people were dancing as well. You were swaying your body when someone from behind you snaked an arm to your waist which made you turn your head to the side. You would’ve regretted it if you were sober since now your face was so close to Baekhyun’s neck but you were pissed drunk so you were unfazed. You could smell his musky scent that was just luring you to bite him. Looking up you saw that he was staring intently at you. He had eyeliner on which only helped accentuate his fierce gaze. You ended up resting your head on his shoulder shamelessly. He smirked.

“I think I’ll take it from here, Jongdae.” Baekhyun said while he rubbed the side of your waist sensually. You didn’t see the exchange of knowing glances and the silent agreement between the two boys but before Jongdae left, he kissed you on the cheek. “Stay safe, kids!” He shouted over the music and he was gone.

“Baekhyun.” The man who had a hand on your hips introduced.

“I know who you are.” You said and started swaying to the music. He raised a questioning brow but went behind you and started moving in sync with you.

“How so?” He asked half curious and half teasing.

“I might have asked about you a while ago.” You shrugged. You felt his hot breath brush your ear as he leaned forward.

“Well at least now I’m sure I’m not the only one interested.” He chuckled huskily and you pressed your ass a little bit more to his crotch. He held onto your hips firmly as you both grind against one another. “Fuck, Y/N….”  The way your name rolled off his tongue made you shiver. “How do you know my name?”

“I might have asked about you, too.”

It was you who smirked this time as you took your sweet time moving your body in tantalizing waves making Baekhyun more intoxicated than he already was. “How about we take this somewhere more private?”  

“Aren’t you being too forward, Mr. Byun?” You asked breathlessly because damn, Baekhyun sure knew how to work his charm. With the way his body moved with yours and the way his voice lowered an octave was doing magic to you.

“I’m doing us both a favor here, sweetheart. I think we can both agree we want the same thing from each other…so how about we cut the small talk short and get straight to the action?” He growled and bit your earlobe. It was the only encouragement needed when you quickly took his hand and made your way across sweaty bodies to go outside. Everything was happening so fast but the alcohol was making you act without thinking. 

You both gripped onto each other as you stumbled inside your apartment, your sloppy kisses unceasing. He helped you remove your coat and you shrugged it off sighing in content when you felt the cool air hit your skin. 

He helped you with the rest of your clothes until you're only left in your undergarments. "Black lace, huh? Looks like someone really planned on getting laid tonight..." He was eyeing you up and down drinking in your visuals. As an art major and a guy who had slept with tons of women, Baekhyun could say your body was truly a masterpiece. His gaze on you darkened immensely as he imagined ramming himself hard and deep in your tight cunt. The fervor made his imagination run wild as you were both back on each other, making your way to the bed.

Of course, not wanting to be the only one vulnerable, you ripped his button up shirt hastily causing one or two buttons to fly somewhere in the room. He bit your bottom lip harshly which made you hiss. He pushed you a little, "What the fuck? You better fucking pay for this. This is designer." 

You ignored him and continued your assault as you unbuckled his belt, surprisingly enough you skillfully removed it and had his pants off him in no time. He was left as bare as you and you licked your lips when you saw the undeniably big tent straining in his boxer shorts. He raises an eyebrow and looked smugly at you. "Like what you see?" You rolled your eyes. 

"I just hope you fuck fast as much as your smart mouth moves." You retorted. He chuckled as he snaked his arms around your waist. His hot breath fanning your swollen awaiting lips as he whispered, "Oh wouldn't you want to know." 

The kisses you shared were nothing passionate and sweet and you weren't complaining. It was full of tongue action and leaving purplish bruises to remind you the next day of the one night stand you had. You weren't looking for someone who'd make love to you and care for you when you went to the party. You were looking for someone who'd fuck you senselessly until you cum so hard and forget all the thoughts that troubled you. And Baekhyun was more than willing to be that someone. 

He trailed wet kisses down to your cleavage and you arched your back for him to expertly unclasp your bra. He took one nipple in his mouth and skillfully swirled it with his tongue while he played the other with his fingers. You moaned shamelessly, loving the attention he's giving your breasts. You bucked up so his hips would meet yours and he groaned in response. 

Usually, you were into foreplay. But being sexually frustrated for weeks now, you just wanted Baekhyun to be inside you. Your wet pussy was rubbing so sensually with his hard meat and it just felt so good you almost came. "I think now's a good time to fuck my brains out, Baek..." You moaned in his ear. "A girl who knows what she wants..." He trailed off as he immediately flipped you on all fours. "That's fucking sexy." 

His other hand held your upper body down to the mattress while the other was on your side to keep your hips on sticking upwards. He pulled your panties down to your knees and positioned his cock at your entrance. "Ah shit...." You buried your face on the pillow as he entered you not too gently. 

"Oh fuck.....Y/N you feel so good..." He groaned as he started moving his hips, already finding a steady pace. Having Baekhyun inside you felt like you were on cloud nine. His cock made you feel so full and you knew this would be one of the best sex you'd ever have with a stranger. The sexual tension you felt between you two were just shown with every hard thrust he did. He went faster and harder and you just knew you'd be sore tomorrow morning. 

The way he pounded you from behind was just so overwhelming and intense you were having a hard time keeping your hips up. Baekhyun noticed this so he put both of his hands on you hips while he gripped tightly, sure to leave a bruise on your pelvis. 

He hit a certain spot which made you moan his name wantonly as you clenched your pussy more making his thrusts grow erratic. 

"I'm coming..." You panted. 

He reached out a hand to your clit and rubbed furiously. You shouted his name as you came. Baekhyun followed with a load groan as soon as he felt your tight snatch convulsing around his dick. You felt his cum fill you up and you hummed in satisfaction. 

You fell face first on the bed as he pulled out and collapsed beside you. He spoke breathlessly after a few minutes, "You take pills?" 

"I think it's a little too late to ask that but yeah I do." You replied still having your eyes closed. You were still trying to catch your breath when he flipped you on your back and hovered over you. You opened your eyes and was met with his dilated pupils, already feeling something hard nudge on your opening. 

"Then that means we're far from done, sweetheart."

[meowsaidmayaanime]

2016 Monthly Watches and Top Picks

An amalgamation of links to my personal watches and top picks, that being said there are a lot of anime I have not watched. If there is an anime that you think I should watch, recommend it to me in my Suggestions page or in the respective comments sections of my posts.

NOTE: I do not have any monthly watches or top picks from January to April, because I started this site in May of this year.

Links To My Monthly Watches (New links will be added soon)

My Monthly Top Picks

May Top Pick

Tokyo Ghoul

Only a few minutes before my 21st birthday I finished this series. Which means that I was an emotional wreck crying out ‘he knew!!’ while also being super excited to go out and buy my first drink; a Bloody Mary, approximately 17 minutes after officially being 21. Anyway, Tokyo Ghoul is so good. I loved it because it did not follow the path I expected it to, every event and conclusion ended up surprising me but in a good way! Without spoiling too much or going into a full review, the main character never became a ‘Mary Sue’ and the way it ended was not typical in the least. I have so many things to say but they all contain spoilers, anyway I’m glad I wasn’t deterred from the anime because one of my friends said he didn’t like the manga because of his assumption about the character. Dude, you were way off, I haven’t read the manga, but the anime is so different and so amazing. 5 out of 5 would recommend!

June Top Pick

Blue Exorcist Movie

The movie has nothing to do with the plot of the anime at all, and takes place after the events in the series. Atleast I’m fairly certain it does? There’s an important (and spoiler-y) thing that happens at the end of the series, that is never addressed or acknowledged in the movie which I think is really weird….. Either way, the movie itself is simply a completely stand alone story from the series. And it was absolutely stunning! Sooooo much detail went into all of the backgrounds and items. On top of that its very well scripted, and the plot flowed incredibly well together without being convoluted, which is surprising since a number of movie sequels to tv series’s tend to go overboard by stuffing too much information into an hour and a half.

It was amazing. Its possible that someone could watch the movie without watching the single season anime, just because of how it was written. However you would not know the relationships or the back story of the main character, which helps to explain a lot of the terminology and setting. Especially the part about demons ect ect.

Either way, I LOVED this movie. I didn’t even know that there was a movie at all until just now. I’m going to re-watch it with a friend when she gets back into town and I am soooooo excited because I KNOW she will love it too. I HIGHLY RECOMMEND IT. I RECOMMEND THIS SO HARD.

July Top Pick

Haikyuu!!

I have boarded the sports anime train, and I don't think I'm ever getting off. This is the fifth sports anime I'm watching and I think it may be my favourite. It's funny too because I only recently started watching sports anime when I watched Free! last December.

This anime is fabulous! I know I say that a lot, but it is so true! Haikyuu!! is about Hinata who joins his high school Volley ball team. The rest of the show is about the developing relationships between the team, the development of their characters and skills, and their relationships between the teams they play against as they try to make it to the Nationals.

I love so much about this anime, every character is different, has their own reasons for playing, their own personalities, their own skills, and their own developmental journey. The characters are amazing!! On top of all that the animation is great, they animate the games incredibly well, and whenever someone does something that's particularly fast or strong they do a fabulous job of showing it through the art style and movements. Ah, I could watch this show for days, well, more days than I already have. (Click the image to view the gif, cause for some reason it won't automatically play...)

Look at the smooth animation!!

Speaking of the art style, It's different than whats common in anime, feeling a little more like a manga, but that's what makes it so great. The style allows them to make fabulous faces/expressions and movements. and Oh man the faces are great, I LOVE an anime that's able to use such a variety of expressions on so many different characters. Look at these faces!

Its such a feel good anime, its so light-hearted, and bright, and funny, and intense! There are only two season out right now, but the third season is to air this fall! I'm so excited!! so, So, SO excited!!! AAAHHHHHH~

This is a must watch. It doesn't matter what genre of anime you like, everyone should give this one a chance.

August Top Pick

Hyouka

So the first thing i need to mention is that this show is first and foremost a slcie of life that happens to include a lot of mystery. Not a mystery that happens to be a slice of life. I originally thought it was the latter which was why I was disappointed that it didn't end the series with a mystery arc, but instead the way a slice of life would.When you acknowledge the show for what it really is, a natural slice of life, it is amazing. For numerous reasons.

First the artwork is so incredibly detailed and beautiful. Second the visuals are distinctly different for each thing ti tries to convey, and completely succeeds in doing so. The audio is amazing, the music is beautiful, the animation is so smooth and they even animate things that aren't necessary to the plot but are animated anyway to make it all feel so REAL. Not to mention the episodes and mysteries are so well written!

look at the incredible amount of detail they put into EVERY SINGLE SCENE.

even when the background is blurred even people who we never learn about or see again have details in their clothes, faces, and expressions. I checked, we NEVER see these people below actually interact with the main OR minor cast.

I almost forgot, this show is about Houtarou a high schooler that sees the world in 'gray'and whose motto is "If I don't have to do it, I won't. If I have to do it, I'll make it quick." Convinced by his already graduated sister, he joins the classics club which was endangered to be disbanded because there were no more members. He meets a girl named Eru who also joins the club and discovers that he has a knack for solving mysteries. That is, only when Eru earnestly goes to him and yearns for him to solve the mystery because her curiosity cannot be contained. From there they quickly discover that the classics club has a past shrouded in mystery.

Its incredibly well done, I love slow the pacing myself, because it fits the flow and nature of the anime. However I do have a number of issues with it myself (some reveal content spoilers so I won't state those here).  I admit that the way they ordered large mystery arch and single episode mysteries was not handled well at the very end. Don't get me wrong the ending fit the characters incredibly well and was very good and realistic, however considering the quality of the larger mysteries that were prevalent through the rest of the anime, I feel that they should have ended the series with a multi-episode arc and then one final single episode arc, rather than many single episode arcs strung together.  The anime was an adaptation of a light novel, which covered 4 out of the 5 published novels. I've taken a look at the titles of the chapters and it seems that the 5th book is quite the elaborate story. One I would have liked to have seen in the anime, though would clearly have gone over the 22 episodes the anime ended at. Perhaps since this write up for the episode is already so long, I will create a post just about this anime. It definitely deserves more talking about!

Anyway, I do recommend it to veteran-ed anime watchers. It has a wonderful pace that does not push by quickly, great character development and insight, and fascinating mysteries and dialogue regarding such. Its perfect for anyone who loves natural slice of life. Those who enjoy mysteries would also enjoy this, as long as they understand that it is mostly a slice of life, and thus will follow the format of slice of life and not the format of a mystery anime. Its a stunning anime.

September Top Pick

Natsume's Book of Friends

This is an incredibly adorable show. Its heartwarming and has a 'feel good' movie feel to it. If anything taking into account the art style and how good it makes you feel it reminds me a lot of Fruits Basket. Don't get me wrong, its nothing like Fruits Basket in terms of story, but its got the same 'feel'.... if that makes sense.

Anyway, the premise is that Natsume is the only one able to see yokai (Japanese monsters/spirits/gods). After moving into a new town with some distant relatives, Natsume finds out that is deceased grandmother could also see yokai and made quite the reputation among them. She would take the names of local yokai and put it into a book called the book of friends, with their names she could control the yokai. Now yokai are coming after Natsume either to ask him to return their names or to take the book of friends for themselves.

The majority of the show is about Natsume steadily coming to understand both humans and yokai more clearly than he has before. Making friends, learning about the lives of others, learning about his grandmother, and finding out what it really means to be apart of a family and not be ostracized by others because of his ability.

This show is wonderful, its not as gripping or super emotion/action driven as some other shows are, but its very well done. The character are great, the stories are so heartwarming, and it breaks a number of the stereotypical cliches that are often found with anime about a character who can see something that others cannot. An example that I particularly love is how other characters who come into the mix who are also able to see yokai are not automatically 'evil' or an antagonist. So rather than causing mroe trouble for Natsume from the 'get go' they are actually there to help develop him into a better character. Which I love~ Any actual antagonist that shows up are antagonists for a real reason, rather than just for the purpose of having one.

If your into exorcism anime or anime that focuses on traditional Japanese monsters/spirits/gods you will love this one. It is slower paced and focuses more on story than action so keep that in mind. Also keep in mind that there are only 4 season out right now as of this post. Season 5 will be coming out with this falls simulcasts and I'm super excited for it

[thai-raw4cf-blog]

Planning High Technology Software & Hardware Products

There are many ways to skin a cat, so the saying goes. Product planning of high technology software and hardware products seems to fit in the same category.

While there are some models that you tend to see over and over again, there are a lot of different ways that planning of products occurs in the technology industry. And there are new buzzwords for this activity appearing all the time–“Customer Development” has been the current rage for a while — but the fundamentals of good product planning don’t really change. And no, communities built around SaaS business models don’t obsolete the need for product management/planning as I wrote here.

Technology-driven Product Planning

One typical method of planning products is what I call “technology-driven”. That’s when an engineer, software programmer, or inventor comes up with a new way to apply an existing technology in a novel way to a different, unsolved problem. Or in some cases the developer is a true visionary and actually invents a new breakthrough technology that blows away the existing way of doing things.

While this technology and developer-driven model is very common–and when it works it can lead to blockbuster successes–this approach in many cases is rife with problems. I have repeatedly been brought in to clean up the results of this approach in my consulting practice. The reason for this is that companies using this approach usually have a technology or product-centric view of the world. And what’s missing in the view?

Customers!

Now I don’t want to insult all the technologists out there who have taken the lead in developing products. Of course, many technology professional understand the need for customers and the importance of getting their feedback in the product development process. Some have a natural knack for product planning and are highly effective at it. Yet the reality is that product developers aren’t trained to–nor do they generally derive pleasure from—trying to extract product preferences, unsolved problems and workflow issues from potential customers. Let alone put all of these in the bigger context of an overall MARKET. In addition, often customers don’t really know what they want or have some other agenda which can lead any product planner in the wrong direction—unless the planner is experienced and savvy in uncovering the desired information. Let’s face it, developers are trained to design hardware or write software code. Many do pick up product planning skills—but in my experience, it’s not generally a natural fit with their interests or training and far less than the majority excel at it.

A common end result of a technology-driven product is often one that is launched and gets a few customers, but then stalls long before gaining full traction and critical mass in the marketplace. Precious cash has been burned through and a typical lament is “it’s a great product, if we could only find someone to sell it”. What is frequently believed to be a customer-facing sales and marketing issue is quite often a product that doesn’t meet broad market needs in some respect—a result of flaws in the product planning process.

Customer-Centric Product Planning

Another common way that I’ve seen products planned is what I call the customer-centric approach. This method is characterized by focusing on a few “model customers” coupled with a fanatical devotion to using their input to develop the product. Often you will see this in a company that has previously failed using the developer-centric model discussed above. Sometimes, it’s the same technologists on their second try. Now you may be thinking, this is the way you do it! But while this approach is definitely an improvement in some ways over a purely technological approach—it too has some limitations.

The customer-centric model works well if you are developing for a very limited, niche market—or at least one that is quite homogeneous. The problems occur in two areas. First, if your target market is of a heterogeneous nature, it is easy to miss that part of the market that isn’t represented among your select few model customers. That can sometime be a LARGE part. Secondly, this approach can sometimes stifle innovation. In high technology, customer input is very important—but customers shouldn’t be doing your product planning for you. Each has their own quirky agendas, unique to their individual companies.

In addition, customers often can’t see far enough past their current problems and needs to imagine how to best apply new technology to make a radical improvement in their workflow, looking 1-3 years down the line. So if you only build what they tell you to build, you will often end up with a “state of the art today” product, as well as one that contains a few features that the greater market will scratch their head over why they were included. Worst of all, the product may be nearly obsolete by the time it hits the streets, because you haven’t looked far enough ahead of the market and built-in what’s possible and desired for the future. These products get stuck in the present of when they were planned—which in the tech world is the distant past by the time they are introduced.

Market-centric Product Planning

Finally, let’s talk about the way most products OUGHT to be planned and built. I call this approach a market-centric model, which includes elements of both the customer and technology-driven approaches.

The most basic requirement for success in this approach is to have a skilled, balanced product planning team. The core of this team consists of an experienced Product Manager with a marketing background and an experienced Engineering Manager or Technical Project Leader. I call this the “2-headed monster” of product planning.

Having two leaders to a project sounds like a prescription for design-by-committee, which usually satisfies no one. And there are definitely dangers to this approach. The most problematic (and frequently encountered) issue is when the Product Manager and Engineering Lead clash. Maybe they just don’t like each other or clash for other reasons. Then you have a real problem—and one that must be dealt with quickly. But that’s a topic for another article. The important thing here is that to raise the odd of producing a truly GREAT high tech product, both the Product Manager and Technical Lead possess key expertise that needs to be brought to the table.

The Product Manager is the market expert and customer proxy when necessary. He is the one who is trained, experienced and skilled at uncovering the true needs and latent desires from potential customers. He also has to have a broad perspective, so he must see to it that all important segments of the market are canvassed to ensure that the resulting offering is MARKET-driven—not shaped by love of a cool technology, or peculiar requests from a few key individual customers.

The Technical Lead brings a couple of critical skills to the table. He keeps the discussion centered on what’s POSSIBLE, ensuring that you don’t plan a product that can’t meet the required timing and budgetary constraints—or worse yet, can’t be built at all! In addition, he or she can “see ahead” and inject the use of new technology to solve a problem in a way that those less technical might not be able to envision.

I won’t pretend that this approach to planning products is easy to implement. In truth, it’s hard to pull off. The key ingredients to success for this model are an honest, open process and culture, where everyone is motivated by the success of the product and ultimately, the company. In companies with a high degree of politics, or rivalries between departments, the process tends to fall apart quickly, to no one’s benefit or satisfaction. Immature individuals driven by ego or focused on their own wants and needs will also sabotage the process. Mutual respect between the key players is critical. Openness is also key; anyone should be allowed an opinion on any aspect of the product.

An engineer can express an opinion on the customer base or marketing approach. A marketer can have an opinion on what technological approach is most appropriate. This cross-fertilization of ideas is very valuable, and can lead to innovative approaches that just aren’t derived from orthodoxy. But at the end of the day, after all the discussion has taken place, there must be mutual respect and trust in the competency of each functional area. Marketing people must be trusted on marketing matters; developers must be trusted on engineering matters. If that trust isn’t there or is lost during the process, a successful product as an end result is far less likely.

Best for Success

When done right, the market-centric approach to product planning is optimal. It usually leads to solid singles and doubles, with the occasional home run. It reduces your risk of an outright flop, while increasing somewhat the normally long odds of creating a blockbuster, market-leading product. Once a company has evolved their product planning process in this manner, it should be poised to introduce a succession of market winners.

That’s my take on planning great high tech products. I’m sure with some people my view will be controversial. What’s your view? Post a comment or drop me an email message to discuss.