#why did I just sob to night at the museum 3 | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

pbandjesse · 2 years ago

Text

Guess what. Everything absolutely worked out. We are currently in our cruise ship room. The boat generally rocks and I am so stupid happy I have cried multiple times today.

Last night was tough. I had the thought about the boarding passes right as I was starting my post. Which is when we realized we never got any and that lead to a two hour absolute anxiety meltdown. I was sobbing at points. I thought I was going to be sick. I had to call my mom because I was in such a bad state. Sleep was very hard.

At 4am James woke me up and told me everything was fine. As soon as they opened the app the tickets were there to open. We took screen shots and James texted mom to let her know so she wouldn't be stressed either.

But it wasn't as much of a relief to me as I had hoped. I still felt super nauseous with anxiety. I would just sit in the bathroom on and off for the next two hours because I thought I was going to throw up. I never did but I did not feel well.

Eventually James held me and I was able to fall asleep for a few more hours.

James woke me up at 830. Which was a little later then we planned but ended up being the right call. I needed the rest. And I didn't need to pace in the room before our tour bus came.

I felt a lot better though. The relief wasn't exactly there but I didn't feel so scared. We finished packing up our bags. I got dressed. I love this new dress James got me last week. Makes me feel like a princess.

I was excited for the tour. I tried to eat my muffin we got at pike place and it was good but the icing/cream cheese filling was a little overly sweet and upset my belly a little more. I tried to sip my soda but it was just sugar on sugar and it turned my stomach a bit. Nerves were just this side of on edge.

We checked out of the hotel. The woman at the desk was so nice. She said she chose our room spacial for us. And that made me feel good. I love those little acts of kindness.

We waited outside for the tour bus. It was loud of there because of construction in the street. James had gone out earlier to get coffee and said they were glad it had been quiet then at least.

I wasn't sure where the bus would come. We knew it was a mini coach so it wouldn't need to much space. But because of the road construction the normal pick up spot was blocked. I went and asked the van driver for the hotel if he knew and he said by where the restaurant was. And he was correct.

Our driver was named Steve. And he was an absolute sweetheart. There was one couple on the bus already, who were also going on the cruise, and after we got on Steve took us to pick up one more woman who was just getting the tour and she was very nice.

The ride was fun though! Three hours, with 3 small stops for pictures. Mostly Steve just told us about all the neighborhoods and history. He was funny and kind. I really loved just watching the world but also learning about prices of homes and who lives where and why things were the way they were. In the late 1800s Seattle burned down because of a grease fire and so now all the old buildings are msde of brick. And I loved seeing the weird changes. Like all the buildings in that old part of town have an underground original first floor. So there is an abandoned underground city?? Wild.

We got to make a few stops. We would have about 20 minutes each time. The first stop me and James ran to the Klondike museum and I took pictures of all the signs so I can read them later. We bought a pack of postcards and took pictures in their fake general store. It was silly and fun. Honestly a really cool set up and I enjoyed it a lot.

Next we would go to the locks where the salon are like. Funneled? They weren't there but we did get to see some seals and a heron. A nice girl let me let her absolutely adorable dog who was a shitzu with some Brussels griffon and the dog was so soft and such a sweetie. And I just enjoyed the sunshine. It was a beautiful day.

Before we got back on the bus we went over to see where a blue heron colony has set up nests in the trees. And it was like wildly cool?? They were all making noises and they were super far up. It was fascinating to see.

The last stop was in thr Queen Anne neighborhood. Where we got to see an incredible view of Seattle. And it was just beautiful. We absolutely lucked out. What a beautiful day.

I felt a little nauseous though. Transitions are super hard. But now that I realize that nauseous feeling is anxiety I'm trying to say what I'm feeling. So I told Steve. That I was nervous about being late to the cruise. And he said I had nothing to worry about. And that really helped. Love Steve, best tour guide.

We did get stuck behind a train for a minute, but once it was past we were off the bus and he was giving us our bags. And we were off.

James lead the way. And we found the check in. And honestly it went super well. James set off the metal detector with their shoulder. But not a big deal. Our edocs worked just fine. And then we were in the final check in line to get our cards that are used for our keys, credit card, and everything else.

We were in that line for a while. Before we got in the line a staff member, an older black gentleman in an excellent hat, high-fived us for being on our honeymoon. And we got our picture taken but I don't know where those go. It was all just fun and good.

Once we got our cards everything moved fast. And we were on the ship!! Ahh!! It's big! And we are on one of the top floors. We went and found our room. And it's bigger then I thought it would be. No window, but that's okay. I was super happy to be here.

We took a few minutes to take some stuff out of our bags and put a few things away. And then we decided to go find food.

We went to the buffet. It was a bit loud but fun. We made a rule that if we get separated James will stay in one place and I will come and find them. And so far so good. The food was excellent overall. The coleslaw was to garlicy but everything was good and I am going to have fun trying stuff. I also have the ability to make Arnold palmer's and that is thrilling.

After we ate we walked a whole bunch of the ship. I am sure we missed stuff but it was fun just looking. The stores weren't open yet because we were still at the docks but there are literally multiple jewelry and watch stores. So weird. Also an art gallery where 90% of the art was horrifically bad. Makes me feel better about my art.

I was feeling a bit tired. I decided I wanted more pizza. So we went back to the buffet. We wanted to figure out how our cards worked at the bars to get sodas. But then James went while I sat at a table but they were gone for almost 10 minutes and I was so sad. Like I didn't know where they were and I felt like. Abandoned a bit. I know it was dumb but I got upset. Which made my food taste bad. Once James finally came back I felt a lot better. But I was a little tired.

Overtired. So we decided to go lay down for a little.

This did not work as well as I hoped. I tried to sleep. I got all cozy and put on my sleep mask. But then the captain and cruise director came on the intercom and we had to do an evacuation drill and we were confused about if we needed to go to our evac site and so we didn't. We just listened to the talk. But at the end the cruise director, Tiara, said we should all be at the sites. So we quickly got redressed and walked the 7 stories to go to the restaurant where our meeting point is.

The guy was nice and wasn't mad at us for being late. I was still tired but it was almost time for the ship to depart and I wanted to see that.

So we went back to our room and got my totebag to get together a few things. Headphones, a battery pack, my tablet. And we went to the observation deck.

That is on our floor. Which is excellent. And we went and found a couch with a view. And I went and got an Arnold palmer and James got a coffee and a cake. We found an even better couch and moved. And then spent the next few hours watching the water. Watching Seattle disappear. Watching the beautiful nature. I drew on my tablet and listened to music. And it was just lovely.

Eventually they turned down the lights. And people started going away. James decided they wanted to go and take advantage of the gym and go ride an exercise bike.

And I would just enjoy sitting and drawing. I was a little overly emotional, probably from relief, a lot because I'm so happy and feel so much love, I have cried a few times today. But it was all happy tears.

While I was sitting there drawing, a nice older woman from Singapore came over to talk to me. Her daughter in law wanted to buy me a drink because I was talking to them. And I was I'm good; but thank you! And I just really enjoyed our conversation. She also does art and is in a sketch club and was just a lovely lady. We talked for a while. But then she let me get back to work and we all just enjoyed the nature.

Eventually my headphones were dying and I wanted to go back to our room. Me and James decided if they came back and I was gone I would have only gone back to our room. I did make a lap around the deck to see all the sides, and then went and looked at the model of the ship to try to orient myself. And then back to the room. I got slightly turned around but I would find the room and everything would be just fine.

We had a voicemail which was weird. But it was just encouraging us to spend money on more cruises. And we had our event calendar for tomorrow. Which had so much and was a bit overwhelming. But it made me excited.

James got back soon and got cleaned up. They said riding was fun but they found the water distracting. Which I thought was funny.

Once they were cleaned up we decided we should get a little food before we ended our night. So back to the buffet we went. I think that's going to be a lot of our trip. Not mad about it. It's fun!

We got back there and James got a burger and I got watermelon and pasta. We got seats right at the front of the ship. We got to see the sunset and it was pink and breathtaking. I felt so happy.

We had our food. And split some eclairs. And laughed at a little baby who kept throwing sugar packets. It was just. Fun and good and I am in love and it is so nice.

We made another go of walking around the ship. We found many interesting things. I found an ornament that I am sure is supposed to be a towel (sea) monkey but James and the staff member think it is a bear and I am sure they are wrong!! But it was mostly fun to just be silly about it.

We found the arcade. Which was a little to much but we played a few claw machine games. And I won two small ducks! Which we can add to the duck I found earlier in the day!! I am rich in ducks!! I hope I find more because the one I found made me so happy cause it was so silly.

We got back to our room after walking everywhere. And I got showered and changed. I had washed all my socks in the sink almost as soon as we got here. And that made me feel better about stuff. And by this time they were mostly dry. Excellent. And I took a nice shower.

And now we are in bed. And I am tired. I am so glad tonight is not so full of stress. That I am being gently rocked by the movement of the ship. And I am so happy.

Tomorrow is a sea day. I don't know what we'll be able to see. But I hope we can spend a lot of time just watching the world. It's like the train but more. It's all a surprise. James also chose a few things from the events of the day to check out. And we have a reservation for dinner as t one of the nice restaurants. And I'm hope for a really good day.

I hope you all have a wonderful day too. Sleep well everyone. I love you.

3 notes · View notes

bonky-n-steeb · 4 years ago

Text

𝐶𝐼𝑅𝐶𝐿𝐸𝑆

𝘽𝙐𝘾𝙆𝙔 𝘽𝘼𝙍𝙉𝙀𝙎 𝙭 𝙍𝙀𝘼𝘿𝙀𝙍 | 𝙎𝙏𝙀𝙑𝙀 𝙍𝙊𝙂𝙀𝙍𝙎 𝙓 𝙍𝙀𝘼𝘿𝙀𝙍

𝗦𝗨𝗠𝗠𝗔𝗥𝗬: After miraculously staying youthful for nearly seven decades, you thought you had buried your past well. But what will you do when the same past comes right out of its grave?

[𝗯𝗮𝘀𝗲𝗱 𝗼𝗻 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗔𝗴𝗲 𝗼𝗳 𝗔𝗱𝗮𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗲]

𝗪𝗔𝗥𝗡𝗜𝗡𝗚𝗦: ANGST..!

ᴛʜɪs ɪs ɴᴏᴛ ʙᴇᴛᴀ ʀᴇᴀᴅ, sᴏ ᴀʟʟ ᴍɪsᴛᴀᴋᴇs ᴀʀᴇ ᴍʏ ᴏᴡɴ

I hope y’all like it!

MASTERLIST

𝟭𝟵𝟰𝟱

“It’s not gonna be a safe landing!” You slumped back into the chair when you heard Steve shout from the other end. You had been so happy when you had come to the military base, you wanted to tell Steve something that would be soon changing your lives.

But instead what awaited you was this conversation with Steve. “I’m in the middle of nowhere, I have to go down. A lot of lives are at stake if I don’t.”

“Don’t. Steve, please don’t. Everyone here is trying, Steve. They’ll find a way.” You said as calmly as you could despite the tears rolling out of your eyes.

“It’s my choice.” You openly let out a wrecked sob at his words. Why did he have to always sacrifice himself? Why couldn’t he once, just once choose his own happiness?

“Steve, I have to tell you something.” But before you could continue, Steve’s voice blared through the speaker. “I love you.” After that all you heard was the deafening monotonous tune of static from the other end.

☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎

𝟭𝟵𝟳𝟯

The Soldat’s mission was simple. 1. Find the target; 2. Track the target; 3. Kill the target; 4. Get the files and 5. Report back. He had done this a million times, and he was sure he would do it a million times more.

He had traversed the world for his missions; missions that he didn’t remember the details of but were engraved in his muscle memory. This particular day, he found himself in France.

As he had slept the night before in the small inconspicuous hotel, so as to not attract any attention, he had momentarily thought about the beauty of the place. He had let his mind wander to the dark pit of freedom. Wondering that if he was anything but the Soldat, what he would have done here.

Thinking about living even a moment being himself and not a killing machine brought him more pain than relief. It made him realize what he didn’t have and couldn’t possibly ever have, freedom. He thought he had long lost his emotions. But he was wrong, on such nights he felt pain.

He couldn’t remember who he was before or where he came from. He feared that even if he did go back one day, there would be no one waiting to receive him.

As he now stared at his mission who was carelessly walking through the passages of Louvre, chattering about his knowledge to the girl on his arm, clearly trying to impress her, something or rather someone caught his eye.

You were standing across the hall, staring deeply at a painting he couldn’t quite place and was too distracted to read the plaque. You were absentmindedly clutching your sling bag which was hanging down your left shoulder.

Wearing a maroon checkered sweater atop a plane white shirt and matching high waisted flared pants, you looked captivating. He could only see a part of your face from where he was standing and he was twitching to see more.

Enchanted that he was, he followed you as you slowly sauntered through the grand museum. What attracted him most towards you was your calm aura. You weren’t in a rush neither were you restless. Unlike him, you were lost in beauty of the museum.

And more than that, there was something known about you, something familiar. Some bond that he couldn’t place but it was telling him to protect you. For as long as he could remember, he had never felt like that.

Almost as if sensing his presence, you turned around. As the upper half of his face was covered by a hat and the lower half shadowed by a beard, you didn’t recognize him.

Seeing that there were just you two in the vast hall, you gave him a polite smile and said, “Magnificent, isn’t it?” At that exact moment, his brain short circuited.

A little girl was smiling up at him, her hair was blown around by the wind. She was looking up at him with so much acceptance and hope, he didn’t feel deserving of it. Her smile was identical. It was the exact one you gave him now. So were her warm eyes and soft hair. It was you.

Just as it ended, his brain produced another memory.

You were dancing. And so was he. You were wearing a plaid skirt, your hair was neatly combed unlike the previous memory and you had grown up. There was a lot of noise around him, but he didn’t care for it as he saw you dancing gracefully. You were the most beautiful and charming person he had seen till date.

But what he didn’t like was that you weren’t dancing with him. You had your arms around a scrawny little boy with blond hair. Even though he was around your height if not a little shorter, you didn’t care for it. You were looking at him with such devotion and love that his heart ached for it.

He knew that you wouldn’t ever look at him like that. He didn’t know what you saw in that guy that you didn’t see in him. But he desperately wanted, no, needed you to be with him. He himself was dancing with another lady, but all he wanted to do was dance with you. He deserved that much, didn’t he?

He blinked rapidly as he snapped out of the trance. He had tears in his eyes, the ability which he had thought he lost a long time back. As you looked ahead, you were nowhere to be seen.

He sprinted to the other section but he couldn’t find you anywhere. Just like his memories, you were gone too.

��︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎

He had completed his mission, though a little late than usual. He wasn’t going to inform them, but he had spent a day or two searching for you. But he hadn’t succeeded. He didn’t know who you were, he didn’t know your name, he didn’t know how you were even there.

Just that in between, he would be flashed with broken memories and images of you. He tried his hardest to remember at least your name, but his brain was so damaged he couldn’t even do that. Finally giving up, he had reported back.

Just as he sat on the chair, his brain conjured up another montage:

You had tears in your eyes as you looked up at him. “Don’t go.” You incessantly pleaded. He didn’t remember where he was going, but wherever it was, it was compulsory because he knew he hadn’t stayed. It must be the war, he deduced.

“Promise me you’ll be safe. Promise me you’ll come back.” You had gently placed your hand on his cheek and he still remembered that warmth.

“I promise, Y/N.”

Y/N. His Y/N. His brain sparked up with the realization. He knew you. He had known you since his childhood. You were his friend. You were his best friend. He loved you. He had always loved you.

And you were still there. You were waiting for him. Relief washed over him as he realized that if he did go back, you would be there. He wasn’t so alone anymore. He just had to reach you.

But it was late, the cuffs were already in place and machine had already began its work and Bucky was rendered immobile and helpless. He wanted to run to you, he wanted to hold you and tell you how much he has missed you. But he was a little too late.

☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎

𝗣𝗥𝗘𝗦𝗘𝗡𝗧 𝗗𝗔𝗬

Bucky had no clue what he was doing or even how he ended up in this extravagant restaurant. Just that he had to be on his best behavior and smile. Only if the avengers knew how tedious smiling was.

Apparently, he was on a charity date. He didn’t know why the avengers had to do such stunts. Wasn’t saving the people more important and enough? Why did he have to go on a date with unknown people?

He wondered if even Steve and Sam felt like this while they were in some other lavish restaurants. His date was late by an hour and hadn’t even apologized. He would’ve lashed out only if she hadn’t paid in millions for charity.

Throughout the entire time he had tried his best to smile and be polite and he knew he was failing miserably even though it had barely been half an hour since her arrival. While she was talking away, he was just nodding and pretending to listen. Not that he could talk anything interesting, he thought.

Bored beyond his capacity, Bucky started idly staring at other tables. And that’s when he saw you. You were sitting across an old lady as you both chatted happily. You were much too engrossed in the conversation to care about any other person.

He couldn’t believe himself. He rubbed his eyes comically and squinted. It was you, it was definitely, surely, unquestionably you. He got up from the table only to realize he had been caught by his date.

“Could you excuse me for a moment.” He asked with as much politeness as he could muster. His date only sighed and nodded. Quickly dodging the other tables, he reached you. He was too excited to question your existence.

“Y/N!” When you heard your name being called, you casually looked up. Even despite taking at least fifty different identities by now, in your heart, you still were Y/N.

As your eyes locked with Bucky, all the blood from your face drained. You always dreaded this day would come and you would bump into either Bucky or Steve. You had made up a million scenarios and a billion excuses, yet you were unprepared for the actual moment.

Bucky was happier than he ever had been and suddenly smiling was not so tedious. “Y/N! It’s so nice to...” before he could say further, his brain caught up with him. “Wait. Wait a minute. How are you here? How are you so... so young? How?”

“Winter Soldier!?” Your purposely exclaimed. You had read how he actually wasn’t the soldier anymore and just Bucky. But you wanted him to hurt, so that he would go away.

You saw Bucky’s face fall and he simply answered, “Bucky.” He shook himself mentally before asking again, “You are Y/N, right? You... you shouldn’t be here.”

You inhaled sharply and started the gears of your train of lies. “I’m not the Y/N you think me to be. I’m her granddaughter who didn’t just inherit her genes but also her name.” You said with a fake laugh.

In all your long existence if you had become a master in something, then it was lying. You still remembered the first time you had realized that you hadn’t aged a day. And it was almost twenty years since the lightning hit.

In the beginning you had just thought you were youthful but then when your daughter had turned almost 20 and you still looked in your 30s, the realization had hit you like a freight train. After that you had always hid from the government and people by taking fake names and personalities. You were sure there was an FBI file on you.

“Granddaughter?” Bucky asked baffled. “Did she... did she marry?” Bucky’s throat had suddenly gone dry. Did he just expect you to wait for them to come back from the dead?

“Yeah.” You and your daughter lied in unison. You had never married. You had dated very few men after Steve, but didn’t stay with anyone too long fearing that you would be caught.

You had wanted to tell Steve that you were pregnant before he died, or rather froze. You had been so excited that day to tell him that you were going to have a baby. He would’ve been a great dad; you were sure of it.

But just as you had reached the army station to tell him, you had been called urgently inside the bunker only to have your last talk with Steve. But you hadn’t told anyone else that Sarah was Steve’s daughter.

You knew they would’ve kept her under observation to see if she inherited his super soldier genes, which she hadn’t. Also Steve’s name and legacy would’ve been tarnished as he had impregnated you outside wedlock. And you couldn’t let that happen to Steve.

When Steve had resurfaced, you wanted to tell him about your daughter. But then he was too much under limelight for anyone’s good. The revelation would not only endanger you but your daughter too.

“Whom did she marry? Do I know him?” Bucky was curious just as he was heartbroken. “Daniel.” You said with faux confidence. But at the same time, your daughter, Sarah (yes, you named her after Steve’s mother) chimed in, “George.”

You and your daughter looked at each other with pursed lips while Bucky stared at you confused. “Daniel George.” You said trying to improve the situation only for Sarah to say, “George Daniel.”

Bucky raised his eyebrows at you two. He did smell something fishy, but he couldn’t pinpoint exactly what. Why were you both saying different names?

You huffed out an annoyed breath and smacked your face. You were going to get caught with this speed. “Daniel George was his name. I used to call him grandpa Dan. Seems like the old age is catching up on Sarah.”

Your heart shattered at the last line. It was difficult being young yourself and see your own daughter grow old. You had prayed day and night that she would take after either you or Steve and be young too, but the prayers went unanswered. But you were glad she had a normal, fulfilling life.

“Oh. I didn’t know him then.” Bucky rubbed his nape nervously and you wanted nothing more than to console him, but you knew better than to give in to your feelings. “And you two?” He asked pointing towards you and Sarah.

“Aunt.” You replied and just as before, Sarah contradicted you by saying, “Mother.” Bucky made an incomprehensible face and asked, “What?”

Why couldn’t you both get one thing right? “This is Sarah. She is my aunt. But she raised me like her own. Sarah means everything to me.” You finally said blowing out a breath. Bucky nodded but you knew he was suspicious.

Before Bucky could ask any of the other hundred million questions he had, you interrupted him. “I’m sorry, but we should be leaving. We had our dinner and I have an important meeting tomorrow and you have your date.” It was all lies, you both had just arrived.

You could see Bucky’s disappointed written clearly across his face. But he gave you a pressed smile and nodded. “Hope to see you again.” Bucky said and now it was your turn to nod. You wished you wouldn’t ever cross paths.

☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎

You were both standing in some museum. You were entranced with the paintings while he was staring at you. Just then you turned around and with a gentle smile and said, “Magnificent, isn’t it?”

Bucky woke up heaving and in cold sweat. This wasn’t the first time he had dreamt about you. But this wasn’t a dream, this was a memory. He had seen you in 1970s in the louvre, he finally remembered.

You weren’t Y/N’s granddaughter, you were Y/N. That’s why you were so terrified after seeing him and not one of your answers matched with Sarah, because you were lying to his face.

But then who was Sarah? Her face had this odd familiarity Bucky wasn’t ready to accept before. Her warm blue cerulean eyes reminding him of someone he rather not think of at this moment. Was she... was she Steve’s daughter?

He clutched his hair at the thought. Was he thinking too much? But then why would you lie? Why would Sarah be so similar? And out of all the names in the world, why would your ‘aunt’s’ name be Sarah?

Bucky had always been curious to a fault. He wanted answers and he wanted them now. But how would he find you? You definitely changed names if his assumption was even close to the actual thing.

He could search the database and find you. But then it would be too late and the others, especially Steve would know it too. He believed there was a reason you met him and not Steve. You could’ve chosen another restaurant and would’ve met Steve instead. But no, you were meant to meet him. This was fate.

If not you, then he could always find Sarah. Taking his smart phone in hand, he searched your aunt’s/daughter’s name and he hit the jackpot. Sarah was a Pulitzer Prize winning author and very well loved by the people. He mentally noted to read her books soon.

She was married to a rich businessman and had two kids. Seeing their photos, he knew he was right. Her younger son was an exact copy of Steve. But being famous came with some cons. A little bit of searching and he easily found out her phone number, address and email id.

He knew he was being selfish. He knew it was morally incorrect to not tell Steve. But then what would he get? If he did tell Steve, Steve would get everything and he would be left behind like always.

All his life he had been second to Steve. He had been the shoulder for you to cry on the day Steve had rejected you. Steve had thought he didn’t deserve you and had broken your heart only for you to go to Bucky for solace.

That was the only day in his life Bucky had wished Steve would die. Bucky regretted even thinking something that heinous, he was sure he would be the one most broken if something were to happen to Steve.

Bucky didn’t know when you and Steve had started dating as he had been away fighting. But he was glad he wasn’t there as he couldn’t have possibly taken the blow. And knowing himself, he would’ve been selfless and wouldn’t have ever come in between you two, no matter how much it shattered him.

You were the smartest among the three. Being exceptionally street smart, you always knew what to do to get out of a situation with minimum harm. While Steve got into fights and Bucky sorted them out with his strength, you always took care of the aftermath.

As kids, you always made peace between their moms and them. Their moms were always worried but you assured them by saying they won’t act like this. Though you three always broke the promise.

He had loved you since as long as he remembered despite knowing very early that you always only wanted Steve. He genuinely couldn’t understand what you saw in him. He was the better choice amongst the two, wasn’t he?

If he did tell Steve, Steve would get his family and most importantly, you. While he would have to go through the hurt all over again. Hadn’t life given him enough pain? Wasn’t hydra enough? Wasn’t losing himself enough? Hydra had made him forget you, but they couldn’t wipe his feelings for you. He had unknowingly carried them with him all this time.

He had got one more chance. Though the final decision would be yours, but he could always try, couldn’t he? Maybe Steve wouldn’t ever forgive him for what he was about to do. But after going through so much in his life, he deserved a happy ending.

☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎

You leaned against the window as you stared out at the vast runway of the airport. You still hadn’t recovered from the shock of meeting Bucky yesterday. So you did what you knew best, run.

It was always difficult saying goodbye to Sarah, but you had to. She had made her own life and while you were always by her side through thick and thin, you couldn’t mingle in it.

You didn’t care to lift your head and see when someone came and sat on the seat beside you. “So, where are you going?” You scoffed at the question. It was practically the stupidest question anyone could ask the other on an airplane.

“Tokyo.” You answered without lifting your head. “I thought this plane was going to Athens.” You rolled your eye and answered, “Then why are you asking?”

When you heard a surprised laugh from him, you finally turned your head only to squeal loudly, “Bucky!?” Due up the intensity of your shout, almost everyone around you turned and stared.

“Oops. Sorry.” You apologized and looked back at Bucky. “How did you come here?” You asked skeptically. “By car.” Bucky said smirking. Now this is the Bucky you knew. You playfully hit him on his thigh. Only to freeze with fear. You shouldn’t have done that, you chastised yourself.

“Your daughter told me.” Bucky finally answered. Hearing this your breath left your lungs. “What...? I... I don’t have a daughter.”

Bucky folded his hands and sighed. You opened your mouth to further explain, but his face clearly told you he knew everything. “No, no, go on.” Bucky reprimanded. “How... how do you know?”

“Sarah told me.” Your blood boiled at his words. “What did you do to her. I swear to god Barnes, if something happens to her, I’ll kill you.” Bucky simply chuckled at that. He knew whenever you got angry, you would call him by his last name.

Sarah had never once revealed your secret to anyone. “I didn’t do anything to her. I just called her and asked to tell whether my assumptions were right or wrong. She told me everything willingly. So now, you tell me the whole story.”

Sarah had seen how much you had sacrificed to raise her. How you had never once thought of yourself. She knew you were lonely, though you wouldn’t admit.

And she knew there was no one better to understand you than Bucky. So not only had she answered his questions at 4 in the morning, she had also told him that you were leaving.

“It’s a long story.” You said finally relaxing. “We have time.” Bucky felt like the luckiest person now that he had found you. And he wasn’t going to let you go anytime soon.

☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎

“So you mean after the lightning hit you, you haven’t aged a day?” Bucky and you were stargazing, lying down on the sandy shore of one of the serene beaches of Athens.

“Yes.” The sound of waves crashing was better than any therapy. “And why didn’t you tell us?” Bucky urged. “Because I didn’t know. I realized it when Sarah was almost 17.”

“Are you going to tell Steve?” It had been three days since you had come to Athens and both of you had gone back to being best friends as if the years in between hadn’t passed.

Riding on a scooter, going sightseeing and frolicking on the beaches, you both were having the time of your lives. Slowly over the time you were telling him your story.

From teaching English at a University and barely making ends meet when Sarah was a child to later on travelling the world, you shared all your experiences with him. While in between he confessed the things he was guilty for, only for you to reassure him.

“I think it is time. How long am I going to hide the truth from him. And even he has the right to know.” You said somewhat dejectedly. “Why didn’t you tell him earlier?”

“You know Steve. Sometimes he is so focused on doing the right thing, he doesn’t realize what’s pragmatic.” You inhaled sharply before continuing, “I didn’t know how Steve would feel about Sarah. I know he would love her, but I don’t think he would’ve been comfortable back then.

Just think you come back from the dead only to realize you have a daughter and she has sons who are around your own age. Difficult to digest, isn’t it?” You said turning your head back to Bucky who was intently listening to you.

“Does Sarah know Steve’s her father?” You nodded at his words. “Yes, she does. She knows everything Bucky. She even knows you. I’ve told her all about our childhood.” You replied excitedly.

“And what about you?” Bucky asked inquisitively. “I don’t think I’ll tell him about myself. I’m better as Y/N’s granddaughter. I don’t think he would be okay with all the identity frauds I have done.” You said with a breathy laugh.

“Do you know how many times the FBI have tried to trace me thinking I was a spy or something. Do you think the SHIELD would sit quietly if they knew I had unlocked immortality? They’ll probably experiment on me and I do not want that.” Bucky nodded considering your point of view. You were right.

“Can I tell you something?” Bucky asked after considering for a moment. “Tell me anything Buck.” After you answered, Bucky went silent.

“You killed JFK?” You asked fake gasping. Bucky shook his head laughing. “I don’t know, to be honest. But that’s not what I wanted to say.

Do you... do you know I’ve always loved you.” He didn’t know what had gotten into him. Maybe it was the calm of the night or the warm of your being. But he knew it deep within that this was his moment.

You stared at him slack jawed. He loved you? He had always loved you? Why hadn’t you realized before? Why had you been so blind? Was this why Steve had told you to go to him?

Back when you had just become adults, you had told Steve how you felt about him. He was still sick and weak and hadn’t yet taken the serum. But when you had confessed your feelings, Steve had lashed out saying how undeserving he was of your love. And in the heat of the moment, he had told you to love Bucky instead of him. Though Steve had asked you out once he had taken the serum, had Steve known that Bucky loved you?

“Bucky... I didn’t. I never thought you loved me. I’m sorry.” Your voice was a barely above a whisper. “No. Please don’t be sorry. I... I just wanted to tell you. I’ve been wanting to do that since very long actually, but I couldn’t.”

You both sat in a very long silence as you stared at the stars. Both of you didn’t know what to say next. “What are you going to do now?” You pursed your lips at his question, unsure of what he meant.

“I mean, are you going back to Steve?” You could actually hear his hesitation in his words. You had thought about it a lot of times and always arrived at the same answer. “No.”

“No?” Bucky asked suddenly hopeful. “No. I don’t feel it’s right. You know I’ve changed so much in all these years. I’m not the same girl from Brooklyn I once was. And I’m sure he has changed too.

Steve and I had the perfect relationship. I fear if we begin again, with our differences of personalities, it will all fall apart. And I don’t want to taint the memories we had together with a break out.” You hoped Bucky understood you.

“That’s actually true. We aren’t who we once were.” Bucky did agree with you, but at the same time his heart was soaring. There was still a chance, he thought to himself.

“I know this is selfish to ask and probably too soon. But would you like to go on a date with me?” Bucky was either going to regret this impulsive choice or was going to be the happiest man on this planet.

In the past few days, you had pondered on this. You had spent most of your life alone and on a run. By now, truth be told, you were tired. The Bucky you roamed around Athens with was much different that the Bucky you once knew. He was more accepting, more responsible and more caring, even though a little broken.

And at this stage of life that’s what you needed. You needed someone who would understand you and accept you. Bucky had done just that; he hadn’t questioned your choices.

Unlike your younger self, you didn’t need someone perfect like Steve, for he wouldn’t understand your edges. You needed someone who was just as rough, so that together with your cuts and curves, you would make a perfect picture.

Maybe with Bucky you wouldn’t have to run anymore, you would be safe just in his arms. You deserved another chance at life; you deserved a new sunrise. So you answered without hesitation, “Yes.”

☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎

Finally, the day you had dreaded ever since Steve was found in the ice had come. Today you were going to meet Steve and introduce him to Sarah too. There just one catch, you would be meeting him as the granddaughter of his Y/N and Sarah’s niece.

Your heart was hammering in your chest as you entered the elevator in the Avengers Tower. You had seen it from afar quite a few times, but from inside it was majestic. Sensing your tension, Bucky rubbed your back encouragingly. “You can do it. I’m with you.”

Bucky was the best partner you could ask for. While he brought vigor to your somewhat stale life, you provided him his safe space and comfort. You both were like pieces of jigsaw; without each other, you had knobs and sockets that rendered you incomplete, but with each other, you fit perfectly.

Somewhere at the back of your mind, you weren’t sure how Steve would react to Bucky dating you. You had this feeling that he wouldn’t be happy.

Bucky was just as nervous as you but was better at hiding it. He too was coming back to the tower after months. In all this time you both had travelled the places you wanted to go since childhood.

You wanted the meeting with Steve to be private so you had planned to meet in Steve’s suite. Steve still didn’t have any idea that Bucky was dating you.

Exiting out of the elevator on Steve’s floor, both you and Bucky sucked in a loud breath and held each other’s hands tightly, gathering enough courage to enter his house.

“I was so excited to meet you... Y/N!?” Steve had begun on a happy note, glad that Bucky had finally found his soulmate (in Bucky’s own words). Bucky had told him how much his girlfriend meant to him, how she was perfect for him and how she was all he could ever ask for and more. Just that, he never once mentioned her name. Neither had he given a slightest hint that it would be you.

“How?” Was the only word Steve could mutter. He had a lot of questions he wanted to ask but his mouth was too dry and his brain too shocked to formulate any.

“It’s not what you think. I’m Y/N’s granddaughter. My parents named me after her and I do look a lot like her too.” You said still not leaving Bucky’s side. “Granddaughter?” Steve asked the same question Bucky had asked when he first met you.

You and Bucky shared a look before you finally revealed the truth, though only half. “Yeah. Steve I need to tell you something. I know this might be difficult to digest, but I thought it’s better if you knew. You have a daughter.” You said without wasting any further time.

Steve fell back into the sofa after hearing you. “I have... we had a daughter?” Bucky went and sat besides him, and put a hand on his shoulder reassuringly. “I need a minute.” Steve said before disappearing into the bedroom.

As Steve went, you finally let out the tears that had accumulated in your eyes. This moment was very emotionally charged for you and it was difficult to keep the pretense.

You finally let go when Bucky held you in his arms. You didn’t know how Steve would react, but this wasn’t what you were expecting. Agreed he was shocked, but you thought he would be happy at least. You didn’t expect him to walk away.

You dabbed your tears away just in time as Steve walked in. His eyes were red and cheeks wet, a clear indication that he had been crying. “Can I meet her?” You could see the hesitation on his face. You looked at Bucky once before answering, “Yeah.”

☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎

You and Sarah already had a long talk about this potential meet up. Since Sarah was a kid, you had told her who her father was and how brave and noble he was by nature. She had undoubtedly looked up at him.

You rode the shotgun as Bucky drove and Steve sat in the backseat of the car while driving up to Sarah’s place. You had told him all about Sarah and he had heard every single word with great concentration.

Though he had been a little sad when informed she didn’t take after his super soldier genes, he was rather relieved when you told him she was healthy all her life unlike his sickly self.

What came as a shock for all of you, was that Steve had already read her novels and was indeed a fan of her. He himself couldn’t believe she was his own daughter.

“You will be proud of her Steven.” You said as you turned back to look at him staring outside the window of the moving car. “I am.” He solemnly replied.

“This is what she must have wanted to tell me back then. After I came back all I thought about was what she wanted to say, but now I know.” Steve said with tears slipping from his eyes. You rapidly turned your head away from him and sobbed in your handkerchief. He was right, this is exactly what you had wanted to tell him.

“Are you my granddaughter?” Steve asked after considering for a moment. “What? No. God please no.” You squealed. Steve couldn’t get what he said wrong.

“Well, after you were gone, Y/N gave birth to Sarah and later on married Daniel George. They had a son together and I’m his daughter. So Daniel was my grandpa. You and me are not related.” You, Bucky and Sarah had made up this whole story.

“Daniel George.” Steve muttered to himself thinking if he by any chance knew a man by this name. You had decided to make Sarah your aunt as you didn’t want to make it any more awkward by being related to Steve.

As you all reached Sarah’s house, she was already waiting for you. The first thing Steve did was to dearly hug Sarah. You and Bucky left the room under the pretense that they both should get some time alone together. But the truth was you couldn’t have possibly witnessed their meeting without breaking down.

“I hope I haven’t done a mistake. I tried my best Bucky. I didn’t tell him earlier because he wouldn’t have been able to take it. I didn’t mean any harm.” You said through broken sobs. You hoped Steve didn’t hate you for keeping this secret. “I know you did your best. Nobody else would’ve done better. You were always the smartest.” Bucky said pressing kisses to your temple.

Hours had passed when Steve finally came out of the room with Sarah. They both had tears in their eyes and their raw emotions were written clearly across their faces.

The four of you preceded to talk, while Sarah shared various anecdotes of her past, you and Bucky talked about your trip to divert the topic a little. Though Steve was nodding and laughing here and there, he was oddly silent.

Before leaving, Steve asked for only one thing, a photo frame. The photo was of you and little Sarah with her sitting on your hip. You were laughing carelessly and clearly enjoying the morning sun.

Seeing the four of you happily smiling and hugging each other, you though your separated family was finally together.

☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎

“Coming in a minute.” You shouted as you finally set the dishes on the table to your liking. You sprinted towards the door as the doorbell finally stopped ringing, from the pattern of the bells, it was mostly Steve.

“You’re early.” You said as you opened the door to see Steve, wet with the rain, standing at the door with a bottle of wine. “Should I go back?” Steve asked jokingly and you laughed along.

You informed him that Bucky had gone to get some items at the last minute. Looking at the table and the food half served in the kitchen, Steve replied, “You didn’t have to do all this.” You simply shrugged at that.

Since the revelation, Steve and Sarah met very frequently and by now had developed a special bond. The four of you always had dinners together. Today was one such day. Due to the thunderstorm, Sarah had decided not to come, so Steve, Bucky and you decided to carry on without her.

“You still like pie, don’t you?” You asked and he happily nodded, still unaware of your mistake. As a kid Steve had been devoted to pies, they were a rare delicacy due to your financial conditions, and maybe that’s why Steve liked them even more.

Still lost in the sweet high of dopamine, you raised your hand for a high five. Seeing your palm, Steve’s blood ran cold. You had the mark; the exact same mark that his Y/N had on her hand. All this couldn’t be a coincidence, he thought.

When you were young adults, Steve had been cornered by bullies as usual. When you had gone to stop them, one of them had pushed you, only for you to fall and get your palm pierced by an iron nail.

Steve clutched your hand in a death grip and realizing your mistake, you quickly closed it off. “Open your palm.” Steve commanded and you shook your head. “Y/N. Open. Your. Palm.”

“Steve, let me go.” You said trying your best not to cry. “Why?” Steve asked one simply word and you broke. It was because maybe even you didn’t have any answer.

“Why did you lie to me?” When you didn’t say anything, he pressed his fingers deeper into your wrist, sure to leave marks. “Answer me!” Steve shouted.

“Steve, you are hurting me.” Steve quickly let go of your hand. No matter how angry he got, he wasn’t going to hurt you. “I didn’t want you to feel bad Steve.” That’s it, that was the only explanation for your lies.

“How are you even here?” Steve asked somewhat annoyed. “I was hit by a lightning. I haven’t aged since.” Somehow for Steve this wasn’t the most shocking thing he had known today. “Then why didn’t you tell me? Why didn’t you come to me after I came back? We could’ve been the family we always wanted.” Steve was hurt at your betrayal.

“You were at the wrong place at the wrong time, Steve. We all thought you were dead, you yourself thought you were dead. And then one day you wake up and realize that not only somehow am I magically alive, but you have a daughter and grandsons who are your own age. Would you have been able to digest all of it at once back then Steve?”

Steve thought for a moment, you weren’t wrong. He would’ve been completely broken. All his life he had wanted a family, and to know that your kid grew old without you would’ve been more heartbreaking than not having a family at all.

“But why did you hide? You could’ve told someone. You could’ve told Peggy, you could’ve told Colonel Phillips. You didn’t have to run away.” Just then the door opened and Bucky came in. He removed his coat and placed it on the rack, unaware of what had conspired between you and Steve.

Looking at Bucky, Steve asked you, “Does Bucky know? Or have you lied to him too?” You looked down at your feet as you knew the worst was yet to come. “Yes. He knows.”

Steve had never felt more blinding rage before. You had told Bucky the truth but not him. You had trusted Bucky but not him. And you both were shamelessly dating right under his nose the entire time.

Unable to hold his rage in, he stormed towards Bucky. Holding him by the collar of his shirt, he pinned Bucky to the door. “How dare you, Buck? You knew everything still you didn’t tell me.

You got what you always wanted, didn’t you? I shouldn’t have saved you Buck. You ruined everything. You broke my family, Bucky!” If Bucky wanted then he would’ve put Steve away. But he knew he had been selfish. No matter what he said though, Steve’s word hurt more than any whip. Steve’s accusations hurt deep.

“Enough Steve! You want answers? I’ll tell you. If I had revealed that she was your daughter out of a wed lock back then, then you wouldn’t be standing on the mantle of captain America today.

We weren’t married, we weren’t even engaged and it was the 1940s. People wouldn’t have taken it lightly. Also, they would’ve kept Sarah under observation all her life to see if she got your super soldier genes.

And should I have gone and told them I haven’t aged a day so they could’ve experimented on me too?” You rhetorically asked. Steve had let go of Bucky by now. He hadn’t thought from this point of view. Maybe he reacted too much in the heat of the moment.

“I...” Steve began. You stopped him by raising your hand. “Don’t.” You needed to be alone. You needed to get away for a moment. Without thinking further, you took off. Only managing to wear your shoes, you opened the door and left. “Y/N! Wait.” Bucky called after you. But you didn’t pay any heed and kept running in the rain.

Bucky saw it with his own two eyes as the lightning crashed down upon you. It all happened in a fraction of a second, and all he could do was stand there helpless. The electricity clearing its path through the sky and aiming right at your body. The only thing he could do was scream your name in terror.

☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎

Bucky paced furiously around the hospital lobby as Steve sat in one of the chairs with his head in his hands. You were being operated in the hospital, while the two were being restless.

Steve finally looked up through tears at Bucky, “Bucky, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said all that.” He had been nothing but guilty throughout this entire time. He knew it was wrong of him to blame Bucky.

When Bucky didn’t respond anything but stopped from walking any further, he continued. “I was angry and I didn’t think it through. I only thought about myself, I didn’t think what she had to go through.”

He stood up and walked up to Bucky who was standing still. “We have changed Bucky, I know that. Back then I and Y/N were perfect for each other, now, I’m not so sure.

But you, you both complete each other. I’ve seen you two for a long time now. Long enough to know that you both are meant for one another. You understand her better than I ever could. This will hurt me, I’m not going to lie. But I’ll pull it through.

You are worth saving Bucky. You are worth much more than that.” He said as they finally hugged each other. “I can’t lose her. I can’t lose her now, Steve.” Bucky said as he clutched on to Steve tightly. “She’ll be fine. She is a strong woman, stronger than any of us. She’ll make it. I know she will.”

Just then the doctor came to interrupt their moment only to inform them that you were safe. Both of them let out a victory shout, as if they weren’t Avengers but young boys from the alleys of Brooklyn. Bucky knew at that moment, that everything would be fine; everything would be perfect.

☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎

“Come on, we’ll get late.” Bucky said as he hugged you from behind. Tony Stark had arranged one of his grand parties on New Year’s Eve.

“Give me a minute, Buck.” You said as you put on the earring on your left ear. Just then your eyes fell upon the most precious thing that you had been dying to see. Hiding amongst the tuft of your hair near the temple was a fine line of grey.

“Bucky, it’s happened.” You said with happy tears in your eyes. You touched the grey strand with such reverence as if it was the most precious thing you had ever seen, and it indeed was. You were finally growing old; you were finally living.

#marvel #mcu #chris evans #sebastian stan #steve rogers #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x you #steve rogers x y/n #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes #winter soldier x reader #steve rogers one shot #bucky barnes one shot #the age of adaline #winter soldier #captain america

710 notes · View notes

buckystevelove · 3 years ago

Text

My Brightest Star

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Word count: 2708

Warning: ANGST and fluff

A/N: This is my longest work. Please leave comments. Ask, submissions and requests are open.

A week, that’s how long has passed since Bucky’s world felt apart. He should have known, his whole life has been full of tragedy, one after the other. He had 7 years of happiness and peace, he will have to come to terms with the fact that maybe those years would be the only ones in his long and sad life that he would known what real and complete happiness really is.

He met you 7 years ago in a coffee shop, you accidentally tripped and spilled all your coffee in him. You apologized over and over again, Bucky couldn’t care less about the hot drink splatted all over his body, he was so enthralled over the beautiful woman standing in front of him, for years he thought that he would never get love, but you managed to prove him wrong. He claims that it was love at first sight, he simply knew that you were his soul mate.

After the incident, you bought his coffee as a symbol of forgiveness, though he really didn’t care. You exchanged names and phone numbers. Just a few hours later you received a massage from Bucky, inviting you to go for dinner the next day. Soon, one date turn to seeing each other every time you could. You felt for him, and hard. Eventually you met all of his friends, you became a great friend with Wanda and Nat. They would invite you to all the girl nights they had. You got along with Sam, always joking around and making pranks, same with Tony. You also became best friend with Steve, you had a strong relationship with him besides yours with Bucky. You too were like siblings, he always claimed that you were his little sister, and warned Bucky never harm you, or he would have to face the consequences.

Nobody was surprise nor bother when you moved to the compound with Bucky. Everyone was super exited to have you closer, that made Bucky a bit jealous.

You and Bucky were attached to the hip. One year into your relationship, he knew that he was going to marry you, you were going to be the mother of his children. He wanted to spend the rest of his life with you. You were the one, so he asked you to marry him.

It was so beautiful, he took you on a trip to the museum, your favorite place to spend the time. When you were in the sculptures room the kneeled and said; “YN, since the moment I saw you I knew that you were the one, I knew that I was going to marry you, and all you have done is prove me right. You are the love of my life, my partner, my best friend I can no longer imagine a future in which you are not in it, because YOU are my FUTURE. You have been the light at the end of the tunnel, you have brought me happiness, love I thought I no longer deserved after all the awful things I had done, you helped name realized who the real James Buchanan Barnes is, and who I want him to be. I want to be your husband because I love you so much. You are my entire world YN. So, would you marry me?”

At the end of his speech both of you had tears in your checks, you throw yourself over him and said yes over and over again, you were beaming.

6 months after that, many hours of planning and cake tasting, you and Bucky had the most beautiful fall wedding. It was perfect. Your family and the team was there, everyone was so happy for the two of you.

When the time to say the vowels came you couldn’t be more thrilled, you have been writing them for so long.

“James Buchanan Barnes, you are the love of my life. You have been the one who has taught me what love really is, what it is like to love someone with every single atom in my body. You have taught me what is like to be completely and uoughterly happy, that is how I feel when ever I am with you. James, when we met you told me that you only saw yourself as a monster, as the vilan of many people’s lives, but baby, you are my knight in shining armor, you are absolutely everything to me. You are the brightest star in my universe, the one and only. I want to spend the rest of my life with you, I want to tell you and show you how much I love you every day, I want you to feel how much I love you even after we are death. I want to keep loving you and choosing you a hundred of lives after this. Because Bucky, MY LOVE FOR YOU WILL NEVER END.”

At the end both of you were crying, among many other of your guests.

Your honeymoon was perfect. Tony paid the two of you a 3 weeks trip around Europe. Nine months later, you had your gorgeous daughter, Rebecca. She looked exactly like you, but her eyes, she had the most beautiful blue eyes just like her father. The three of you were the definition of a perfect family, you and Bucky did ocationaly fight like all healthy couples do, but your life was great. Your house was so full of love and happiness.

Bucky was so thankful to you, you had given him all he could ever dreamed for in life and more.

The three of you spent all the time you could together, you went to the park and had movie nights, went of family trips and spent lazy Sunday mornings in bed together. You wanted Becca to feel and understand what a loving home was, since you didn’t had one. You wanted her to feel the love you and Bucky had for her.

“Becca, Bucky, you two know you are the most important people in my life right. I love the two of you so so much. You are the ones that make me happy. You are my greatest treasures.” You said to your husband and 5 year old daughter one afternoon, while cuddling in the couch together.

“I love you too mommy, you too daddy. You are the best parents in the world, thank you.” She said kissing yours and Bucky’s face, making you giggle.

“You dolls are my everything. I love you.” He said before attacking the two of you with tickles, and whispering to your ear. “Thanks doll, for all this.”

The day had started like any other Tuesday would, you woke up after your alarm. Waking up Bucky with kisses and loving touches, after he woke up he heads to shower while you got Becca ready. Once the two of them were dressed, Bucky went to the kitchen to make breakfast wihle you got ready. The three of you ate together, you heard how Becca´s best friend was going to have a party next Saturday and you needed to buy her a present. You decided to go to the mall with her after classes and maybe have a girl’s day and do you nails. That made her smile so bright, which was what you loved the most about your life, that it was full of happiness.

After eating, you said goodbye to Bucky and Rebecca, he was going to take her to school and then go to the Avengers compound to train some new recruits, while you went to your office.

Bucky’s day went normal, as any other day would go, he did some training and hanged out with Sam and Steve. When 4pm came around the received a call from Becca´s school, her teacher told him that she was still there. You never came pick her up, he didn´t know why you were late. You always told him if your meeting was going to be longer so someone would pick your daughter from school.

“Sorry man.” He told Steve at the middle of the meeting. “Apparently YN never went to pick Rebecca from school she is there by herself, I really need to go. I also need to see what happened to YN. She is not picking up her phone.” Bucky said standing up from his chair.

“Sure pal, everything good with her?” Steve said a bit worry, he didn´t want his best friend to be in panic.

“I hope so.” He said walking to the door, but before he could reach it his phone rang again.

Steve just stood there, and watched how the color of his best friends face went completely white, then Bucky’s knees failed and he felt to the floor. Tears running down his cheeks, his face was shaking. He was wordless. Sentences couldn´t form in his mouth. Steve was next to him in second, he took the phone from his hand.

That when he heard him scream, he screamed as if he was dying, painful and horrible screams.

“Excuse me.” Steve said through the phone. “This is Steve Rogers. What happened?” He asked, though he already had an idea of what had happened.

“I am so sorry Sir, but I regret to inform you that Mrs. Barnes had a car accident today. She arrived to the New York Presbyterian Hospital at 2:36pm, she immediately went to surgery. She didn´t make it, she was called at 3:49pm. I am so sorry, but we need her husband to come.”

Steve hanged up the phone, he had tears in his eyes, he was about to cry. He had lost his best friend, but he needed to be strong for the man that was like a brother to him, to his nice.

Bucky was in the floor, sobbing and screaming. He went and called for Nat. She enter and saw the state in which Bucky was, then she saw the tears in Steve´s eyes.

“What happened?” She asked in panic.

“I… he…N-Nat” he mumbled between sobs. “Can you please look for Rebecca at school? Please.”

Nat realized, she immediately shook her head in disbelieve, “no, no, no,”

“Nat, please. Someone needs to be with her.” Steve managed to say. She wiped her tears and left the room.

Steve was in the floor hugging his best friend while he cried his eyes out, he was no longer screaming.

“I am sorry buddy, I am so sorry.” He said to his friend. “I know how you feel, just let it all out. But later you need to be strong for your daughter. She just lost her mother, she will need her dad. She needs you to be there for her, but now. I am here for you.”

“Not her, please not her. She is perfect Steve, I can’t, I love her, we can’t lose her.” He sobbed and screamed. “We were supposed to spend the rest of our lives together, the two of us.”

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

When he calmed down, they went to the hospital. A drunk driver had crashed against your car in a traffic light. He died immediately.

Becca slept in Nat´s room. Bucky slept in his old room in the compound, he couldn’t go to your home. Too many memories. He couldn’t face his daughter, he would broke in front of her, he needed to be strong. He cried himself to sleep that day.

He next day was awful, he needed to explain to her 5 year old baby, that her mother would never hug her again. He couldn’t even began to comprehend that.

“Becca, baby. I need to talk to you.” He said the next morning the compounds living room, all the other Avengers were in the hospital helping Bucky prepare every detail for the funeral, Steve was the only one there, next to Bucky and Becca. In case either of them needed him.

“Daddy, why did we slept here?” She asked frowning her eyebrows, just like her dad. “Where is mommy? We were supposed to have a girl´s day yesterday.”

That made Bucky tear a few tears which he rapidly cleaned.

“Babydoll, its because…” Bucky mad a pause and looked through the windows. “Mommy had an accident, and she will never come again.”

Becca made a confused face.

“Why? Can´t you just put her a bad-aid like you do to me when I have accident?” She asked in all her innocence, which made Bucky’s strength fall. He quickly enveloped her in his arms.

“That is the thing baby, she had a big accident, she is gone.” He started to sob again, so did Steve.

Becca began to stroke her father’s hair. “We will see her daddy, someday, but I am really going to miss her.” She started to cry and hug her dad.

“I want my mommy, dad.”

“So do I honey.”

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The funeral was beautiful, full with YN´s family and friends. They all told beautiful stories and tried to remember the amazing person YN was. Bucky couldn’t talk, he had so many things to say, none of them were for this people to hear, they were for his love.

A week had passed since you awful dead, Bucky stayed at the compound, he couldn’t go home, he also needed help with Becca. He could barely managed to take care of himself.

He was in his bed, looking at the celling, numb. He know the needed to stand up and shower, he needed to get up and care of his baby, but she was the carbon copy of you. It was like looking at you, it hurt, it really hurt. Lying there he heard some knocking at his door. Then Steve came..

“Hey pal, the lawyer came today, he left the will and this letter. She wrote it you when you guys had Rebecca.”

“Thanks, just leave it there.” He said gesturing to his night stand.

When Steve left he got up and grabbed the letter, it had his name in your beautiful calligraphy.

Bucky,

My love, I hope that you never have to open this letter, but if you do, I want you to know that you made me the happiest woman alive. In all the galaxies we know that exist, in all the universe that may. I was the happiest, all thanks to you. You teached me what the meaning for being alive really meant, you showed me so many incredible and beautiful things, and you gave me our most amazing gift, our daughter Rebecca, she is the tangible evidence of our love.

If the time in which you have to open this letter comes, know that you did everything you could. Under any circumstances think that this was your fault, it wasn´t.

I love you so much Bucky, you have really no idea, and I know you loved me just as much, that is why I am asking you one last favor.

Please don´t close yourself, don´t let yourself return to the man you were before be met, not that he was any less amazing, but he was lonely. I want you to continue living your life to the fullest. I know I can´t ask you to not miss me or forget me, I don’t want that. I want you to remember my memory and cherish it. I want you to show all then wonders of the world to sweet Becca. Please never let her forget that she was the most important person in my life besides you.

I want the two of you to continue to love, and let yourselves be love. I love you with all my heart, and every single atom in my body.

Don’t forget me my brightest star, YN.

After reading that Bucky cleaned his cheeks.

“I will always love you.” He kissed the letter and placed it in his nightstand. He got up and went to find his daughter.

“I love you baby, and so did you mother. You are our greatest creations.” He no longer had you here, so he was going to spend all his breathing moments showing her how much he loved her, he was the only part left in this world of YN, and she was that greatest gift she could have left him.

He would continue to love you long after you are gone. For ever, til the end of times.

——————————————————————————

A/N: I cried so hard writing this. I am so sorry, but I hope you like it. I really appreciate feedback.

213 notes · View notes

fictional-scenarios · 3 years ago

Note

hello! can i request an angsty fic with aizawa and f! reader where they break up? thank you!

i hope you enjoy this! i did it from his perspective, hope thats okay! also i know he probably wouldn’t actually be like this in a relationship, but for the fic, this is the only way i could see him being at fault :3

always appreciate reblogs and comments! if you’d lie to support me, here’s my ko-fi!

In the worst of the aftermath, Aizawa was not angry. He was never angry, not truly. Not even when he’d snap at his friends for bringing up her name, or when he’d feel rage churning in his stomach at the thought of her being with another. He was never angry.

He was sad. So devastatingly, core achingly sad, that it kept him bed ridden for days at a time. Work, come home, eat and sleep. It wouldn't end.

He’d always considered his quant home a safe haven, but lately it’d been feeling like a prison. It felt like a haunting museum, little bits of her as far as the eye could see. The memories were so vivid, he could still almost see the figure of her standing in his doorway. He could see her leaning on the window sill peering outside. He could see her shoes by the front door, her toothbrush in a cup upon his sink. He could see her under the covers with him, hushed laughter and soft snoring into the early morning.

Even now, he see’s her beside him in bed. He see’s the indent of where she should be, now terribly empty. It makes him feel cold, alone.

But, being alone had never been a huge issue to him before all this. In fact, he knows it was the downfall of him.

She’d just wanted him to go out with her now and then. She just wanted to take photos with him, hold his hand out in public without feeling like she’d been forcing him.

Aizawa buries his face in his hands, his back leaning against the cold wall, blanket curled around his waist like a weight.

All she had wanted was just a little more life. Just a few more kisses, a few more hugs. A few more signs that he truly cared for her, but he wouldn’t hear of it. She knew he loved her, why couldn’t that be enough?

He refused public dates that weren’t anniversaries or events. He hated photos. He hated when she’d clasp fingers around his own, hated it because all it brought was attention. Paparazzi's scavenging and ruining every affectionate and tender moment they’d shared together in public.

He never understood why it had to be public. He couldn’t wrap his mind around why she would insist they get out and so something together. Why couldn't hanging out in the seclusion of his home be enough?

Always so stubborn, especially when it would have been the correct time to give in. His annoyance and unwillingness to be anything other than slow moving and low maintenance drove her away from him. He was just fine being on his own, so why couldn't she?

‘I feel like you’re embarrassed of me,’ She’d cried, having hit her breaking point. ‘I feel like you don’t even really care about me.”

Aizawa’s jaw tightens. Of course I care about you. Why else would I want you here?

He should have said that. But, he didn’t. Just silently witnessed the destruction unsure of what to do next. Unsure of whether to argue, or remain dormant and quiet. Not quite apathetic, but he was never one for a shouting match.

Unfortunately, he chose to remain still in the face of a crumbling heart.

‘Even now, you won’t say a word. You don’t ever talk to me, Shota. You never ask how my day was, or if I want to go do anything. Why do I feel like I’m just here so you’re not lonely?’ She’d had fat tears welling in the pits of her eyes. She looked drained, broken. ‘I need more,’ Voice cracking, a terrible realization she’d stumbled upon. ‘I need more than that.’

It was a tense moment of silence. She shook her head and choked back a harsh sob.

‘Then that’s it.’ Lip trembling, feeling unwanted. ‘I can’t do this with you anymore. I’m leaving.’

At the lucid memory, Aizawa wish's he could go back and punch himself in the head. Say something, you idiot, he’d scream. Tell her to stay.

She’d passed him by, and the door slammed shut before he even turned to watch her go.

It’s been weeks now, and he can’t seem to get his head right. It’d taken days before she came to collect her things, something he hoped would never come to be. A stupid part of him believed that she’d come around for some reason. It’d happened before- her storming out, him never changing, her missing him enough to just... Get over it. This time, however, was much different.

Sinking in the memories, Aizawa feels his throat tighten at everything she’d said, and even worse, everything he didn’t say. His phone lights up beside him.

yamada: are you still moping in there???? come out w us tonight! you need to get outta bed at some point

yamada: its been weeeeeeks!!!!!!! come on!!!!!!!

Aizawa knows he does. He knows his friend has been trying to get him to leave since it happened, but it’s hard. He answered his friend, deciding that tonight he would in fact go out for a few hours just to clear his mind- anything is starting to become better than seeing a home empty of her. He sends the message, and his heart grows heavy.

He said yes to his friends when he was feeling sorry for himself, but never for her. He knew he deserved it, but it hurt not having her anymore. Especially when all he had to do was say yes sometimes.

What stung the most was that he didn’t get to see her when she came to collect all her items, cram them into a box and leave for the last time. He’d hoped at that point, if it ever came to that, he could convince her to stay. But.. She hadn’t told him she was coming. Perhaps because she knew she was bound to give in.

He came from from U.A., hoping that she’d be there, sleeping soundly or sitting terse on the couch ready for an argument ending conversation.

But, she wasn’t there. In fact, nothing of her was. All her things vacated. Everything but the memory of her stripped away.

Aizawa had stood stunned in the doorway. Then, it all came crashing down. She was serious this time. It was set in stone.

She’d really left him.

He didn’t think she’d actually leave him. Arguments were always so easy for Aizawa. He was a firm believer in ‘take me as a I am, or don’t take me at all.’ But, he’d never realized just how much changing she’d done for him.

When he’d first met her at a group outing, she was full of life. She was bouncy and energetic. She had a sea of friends, a world of opportunities. But with him, with Aizawa’s stubbornness combined with her need and want to spend time with him, she went out less and less. Contacts in her phone dwindled from a vast ocean to merely puddles.

Seldom she went out, and on the rare occasions she was able to get Aizawa to go, she’d dress in her best just for him to chastise her. ‘We’re not going anywhere that fancy,’ he’d remark, not noticing how her eyes fell. ‘Aren’t you a little over dressed?’

Guilt tore up his heart, now. She was always so beautiful dressed up like that, how could he ever say those things? Too late did he notice how she’d changed everything for him. Lost friends, missed outings, just so she could remain by his side. He did everything wrong and wasn't even willing to see it. He felt like a neglectful, stubborn, ass.

Forcing himself up from bed, it takes all his strength to get up and wander into the bathroom. He’d need to start getting ready then if he was to go later. He was a slow moving creature, after all. Lazily, mentally drained and exhausted, he opens the mirror and pulls his toothbrush from the little shelves inside. The mirror swings shut and he’s met with his dreadful reflection.

His eyes are even darker, redder, than they ever were with his quirk. Even he could tell he looked worse for wear. Drained, emotionally vacant yet so powerfully overrun with them at the same time. He looked dead. He brings the toothbrush to his teeth, but can’t bring himself to find the motivation to actually begin cleaning up.

So tired.

He just wants to sleep again.

He wants to text her. But he doesn’t.

Tossing the toothbrush into the sink, resting his elbows on the edges and allowing his head to hang in sorrow, he wonders what she’s doing right now. It’s a warm Friday evening, the blue sky wide and clear. He’s sure she’s going out tonight, finally allowing herself the freedom to make up for all the time she’d missed with her friends. Friday’s were always Aizawa’s least favorite day. He just knew she’d want to go out, and he’d always combat it with a movie she’d been wanting to see, coming up with some random excuse as to why it wouldn’t be an ideal idea to go out.

Then, he’d ignore how she sadly watched her friends social media stories about the night, and ignored their texts asking why she’s never around anymore.

God, what he would give for one more Friday night with her. He’d dress up, he’d take her somewhere so nice even he would be afraid he couldn’t afford the food. Her and all her friends. Whoever she wants, the whole world if need be. He’d do anything she wanted, strut her to a party on a red-carpet. Anything just for another Friday night.

Aizawa’s eyes cast back up to his reflection. A lump forms in his throat, he watches his eyes glisten with tears. He wants to fall into the floor and forget about everything.

Pushing himself away from the sink, he shake his head and gags on how tight his threat feels. Without even a moments hesitation, he finds himself right back in his room, pulls the covers aside, and drowns in them all over again. It’s dark, it’s cold. His own rooms uninviting without her.

Yet, he can’t seem to bring himself to leave it.

His phone sits on his pillow. Aizawa opens his friends message.

‘im going to stay in tonight. thank you for inviting me. im tired’

Aizawa doesn’t even want to see the messages his friend instantly starts blowing his phone up with. Instead, seconds after the text sends, he holds the power button until the entire screen goes black. He rolls over to face the wall, and he feels like he’s made of led. He swallows hard and gives into sleep all over again. His arm slings around a pillow, and he clutches it to his chest.

A forever inanimate reminder of where she once laid.

#aizawa shouta #angst #bnha #mha #imagine #x reader

123 notes · View notes

toorusbaby · 4 years ago

Text

end of the day

summary: after a very bad day, all you really want is for your boyfriend, kei tsukishima, to hold you in his arms. however, things don’t go the way you hoped they would.

warnings: self-angst, a very upset y/n, tsukki makes up for it <3

word count: 4,987

The loud jingling of your keys as you unlocked the door to your shared apartment weren’t enough to push the negative thoughts out of your mind. The sound of chirping crickets in the air weren’t capable of relaxing your nerves either.

It had been a long day to say the least, more exhausting than others. If you were running on batteries, the last of your juice was used up hours ago. It was safe to say that you were burned out.

You had left the apartment at seven in the morning, fifteen minutes later than usual because your phone decided to go missing. Since Kei was sound asleep after a long night at the museum, you were on the lookout on your own. In the end, your phone turned out to be on the kitchen counter, the battery half drained. By the time you reached the station, you barely missed the train by a millisecond, having to hail a taxi instead. If one thing went right today, you made it just on time to work.

On the other hand, with the combination of being reprimanded by your boss for missing an important deadline that slipped your mind, a coworker spilling hot coffee on your new blouse, and your thoughts jumbled due to yet another argument you had over the phone with your traditional mother the night before, it was as if your world had come crashing down in the span of a few hours.

It was eight in the evening when you finally left the office, arriving at your apartment’s front door thirty minutes later. The fact that you were starving only made you more antsy. All you wanted at that very moment was to be held by your longtime boyfriend, Kei Tsukishima, as you buried your face in his chest. You needed him more than ever.

Twisting the doorknob, the familiar creak of the wooden door made its way to your ears when you entered your apartment. The living room lights were on, symbolizing that Tsukishima was home. Letting out a sigh of relief, you gently shut the door shut behind you, locking it in the process before your eyes made contact with plastic bags on the coffee table.

Just as you were going to check what was inside, you stopped in your footsteps when you heard the voice of your favorite blond from the kitchen.

“Y/N, is that you?” Tsukishima’s head popped out slightly from the kitchen entrance, his honey brown eyes meeting yours. A tired grin immediately made its way to your face at the sight of your boyfriend, who wore his favorite grey sweatpants and a white t-shirt. His hair was a bit damp, probably from his shower. Without missing a beat, you walked your way over to greet him with the usual peck on the lips, holding your arms out for a much needed hug.

“Kei, I missed you—”

Suddenly, Tsukishima had brought his phone back up to his ear. Your heart dropped at the sight.

“Is he serious?,” Tsukishima scoffed into the phone. “The exhibition isn’t supposed to open for another five weeks. How are we going to make it work in only two? Fucking ridiculous,”, He grumbled, turning his body away from you momentarily.

If you thought the coffee that spilled onto your shirt spread fast, the pain in your chest expanded even faster. You understood that you weren’t the only busy person in the relationship; Tsukishima was both an employee at the Sendai museum and a volleyball player for the Sendai Frogs. Compared to him, you felt as if you had no right to complain about being tired. After all, you only had one job, which was working for a well-known design company. And after today’s fiasco, you weren’t sure you even knew how to do your job correctly.

Kei doesn’t need me bothering him right now, you thought to yourself. He’s busy with work, which is understandable.

The thought was bittersweet; how could you be so proud of your boyfriend yet feel so lonely?

Almost as if he remembered that you were standing before him, the tall volleyball player turned back to face you. Tsukishima pulled the phone away from his ear and placed his palm over the speaker, walking towards you.

“Sorry about that, Y/N. I should be done soon—” You unintentionally cut your boyfriend off.

“Don’t apologize, Kei,” You spoke with the most enthusiasm you could muster. You hoped it was believable. “I know you’re busy with the upcoming dinosaur exhibition.”

When you lifted your hands in front of you to wave his apology off, your navy blue blazer had spread open, revealing the brown coffee stain on your white blouse. Tsukishima made brief eye contact with it, immediately frowning to himself; he knew you had been waiting for it to arrive for weeks.

The exhaustion of the day was catching up with you and you found yourself feeling much more sensitive than usual. Sadness flooded your chest, your heartbeat thudding in your ears. You couldn’t bring yourself to make eye contact with your boyfriend. If you did, you knew you would only end up crying; Tsukishima didn’t need to add you to his list of worries.

Unbeknownst to you, the blond noticed your stiff posture and the way you refused to meet his gaze. Tsukishima opened his mouth to speak, but you spoke first.

“I’m so proud of you, baby. Seriously. But if you’ll excuse me,” your voice slightly wavered. “I’m going to take a shower and call it a night. I’ll see you in a bit.” Flashing a small grin at Tsukishima, you made a beeline to your shared bedroom.

Even if you had tried your absolute best to give him a proper smile, Tsukishima wasn’t stupid. He knew that you were faking it. It only hurt more to know that you were hiding your pain from him.

༺♥༻

Stripping your clothes off, you mindlessly left them in a pile on the edge of your king sized bed. Taking one last glance at the coffee stain on your shirt, you clenched your jaw in frustration. You weren’t sure you could hold your emotions in any longer.

Your feet padded across the room and into the bathroom, your hands moving on their own to open the see-through door of your shower, turning the knobs of the shower faucet. Finally, you stepped inside and shut the shower door.

Although the steamy hot water cascading down your back helped relax you the majority of the time, that wasn’t exactly the case in this situation. Your posture was stiff, your jaw was still clenched, and the crease between your eyebrows only furrowed deeper.

The only sound should have been the water falling onto the shower floor, tumbling down the drain. If that was the case, why could you hear the voice of your boss in your head?

‘I expected more from you, Y/N. A lot more. You’ve never let me down, not once. What happened this time? Do not miss a deadline as important as this again or there will be consequences. I hope you don’t make me regret promoting you.’

The disappointed voice of your respected boss morphed into your mother’s, the tone furious. Memories of her words from the other night played like a record on repeat in your mind.

‘Do you really think that living with your boyfriend at this age is acceptable? You and Tsukishima are only twenty three. A man and woman should not live together unless they’re married. I don’t think you two will last for long anyways. Your father may have been more accepting about it, but I think you made the wrong choice. You’re lucky I’m hiding this from your grandmother. What do you think she’d have to say, knowing her granddaughter was so easy?’

You blinked once. Then you sniffled twice.

You had finally reached your limit. Every hurtful word from your mother, every head shake from your boss, and even not being able to peck Tsukishima on the lips for a second, the way you usually did when you got home, echoed in your head. Before you knew it, hot tears leaked from your eyes and down your cheeks, small hiccups escaping your mouth.

What’s wrong with me?, you clamped a hand over your mouth to silence yourself. That didn’t help much. Why am I such a fucking mess?

Wrapping your free arm around your torso as if to hug yourself, your knees buckled in a moment of weakness. Quiet sobs wracked through your body, annoyance filling you up to the brim when you couldn’t silence yourself. You really didn’t want Tsukishima to hear. Despite the heat of the water affecting your senses, you stood still, allowing the water to mix with your hot tears.

Little did you know, Tsukishima had been standing silently outside your door the moment you had turned the shower on. As soon as he laid eyes on the bunched up clothing on your shared bed, the blond knew you were bottling your emotions. You were always tidy; you never left a mess behind unless you were out of it. You were more similar to Tsukishima than you thought.

And because you were so similar, your boyfriend knew that you were trying to drown out the sounds of your crying as you stood under the shower head. Even if he hadn’t been able to hear your cries, Tsukishima knew you all too well, only because he was the same way. And he loved you far too much to let this continue.

Two quiet knocks on the bathroom door startled you, your hands rushing to wipe your face before you blinked. Trying your best to quietly clear your throat, you sniffled once.

“I-I’m in the shower, Tsukki!”, you called out. “Is everything okay?”

Tsukishima’s silky voice still managed to make your heart skip, even if he was on the other side of the door.

“Not really,” you heard him say in his usual monotone voice. “Mind if I join you?”

Your eyes widened and your heartbeat quickened out of nervousness. You did not want him to see your puffy eyes; you were sure you looked horrible.

“Um, give me a second!” you called out. There was no use in hiding the fact that you were sobbing your eyes out; the reddened skin around them made it very apparent that you were bawling like a baby. The best you could do was rinse your face repeatedly until most of your sniffling went away.

After a few seconds, you cleared your throat. “Y-You can come in, Kei!”

When the door opened, revealing your tall boyfriend who placed one of his t-shirts on the counter, you bit the inside of your cheek. However, when he began to strip, you couldn’t help the blush that rose to your cheeks. His toned, fit physique made your heart race and your pulse quicken. Even if you and Tsukishima had been dating for six years, living with each other for two of those, you couldn’t help but still feel a bit shy.

After all, Kei Tsukishima was your first everything. Your first crush, your first boyfriend, your first kiss. The first person to see your naked body, the person who gave you your first sexual experience, but most importantly, he was also your first love. You knew deep in your heart that the sharp tongued blond would also be your last.

Silently, you watched as Tsukishima opened the shower door. You stepped to the side, allowing his tall frame to enter the shower which was larger than most apartments would have. When the honey brown orbs you loved so much met your own eyes, you gulped.

“Kei,” you mumbled with a questioning tone. “Weren’t you busy with work? And didn’t you already take a—” He cut you off with his own questions.

“I hung up the moment you left the kitchen,” he spoke. ”You’re my priority. What’s going on, Y/N? Why were you crying?” Tsukishima wondered, his tone a bit sharp. Although his tone may have seemed a little harsh to an outsider, you knew that the blond was only worried for you. When he sounded frustrated, it only meant he was concerned. As a result, you only felt worse.

As Tsukishima reached behind you to lower the excessive heat of the water, you let your eyes wander everywhere but his face. This only made the volleyball player clench his jaw. Even though Tsukishima was known for his patience, he wouldn’t tolerate your avoidance of his question.

“It’s nothing, baby. Just a bad day, that’s all. I’m okay. Just a little tired— Kei!” you shouted when the warm water suddenly cut off. The cool breeze entering the bathroom from the open window was sure to give you goosebumps. “Kei, stop messing around. Turn the water back on,” you humorlessly chuckled. You really didn’t find it funny.

You reached for the shower knobs, wanting to avoid any confrontation. Your tears were the last thing Tsukishima needed to worry about, especially because he had to focus on preparing for the new exhibition. Your feelings simply weren’t that important.

As soon as your hand was about to reach the handle, Tsukishima grabbed onto your wrist, gently pushing your back against the shower wall. You let out a loud gasp at the sudden feeling of the cool wall tiles behind you.

“T-Tsukki, what the hell! It’s cold!” You shouted, your back instinctively arching. Your eyes were wide, finally meeting his golden brown ones.

About time, the blonde thought. He missed having your eyes on his.

Suddenly, the boy pinned you against the wall. Tsukishima’s stare was so intense, you instinctively rested your back against the cold tile. His bare body against your own caused your cheeks to redden. When goosebumps formed on your arms, the blond used his free hand to rub them away in order to warm your skin. The action was loving, despite his serious gaze.

“I’ll turn the water back on when you tell me what’s got you so upset, baby.” Tsukishima calmly spoke, his hand quickly moving to lift your chin up the very second you were about to look down. He knew you well; too well. “What is it that hurt you to the point where you’re hiding your tears from me?”

When he asked the second question, you noticed that Tsukishima had used a softer tone, one that was gentle yet doting. The feeling of the pad of his thumb gently stroking your chin brought you back to reality. You loved Kei with your entire being. Despite your fear that you would stress him out, you couldn’t lie to him.

After a moment’s pause, you were ready to open up. Your mouth felt dry, but you forced yourself to speak. “I-I just…” you trailed off. Your eyes wavered on his, your emotions threatening to take over once again.

Tsukishima could see the glossy screen making its way over your eyes. He knew that you always tried to display your strong side, but he also understood your sensitivity. For you to cry alone, Tsukishima would never allow it. But for you to cry in front of him, in his protective arms, he wanted you to know that everything would be okay. Even if things didn’t seem like they were going to go well, Tsukishima would make sure everything worked out. For you.

Everything he did, Kei Tsukishima did it for you.

“Kei, I just…” your voice was uneven. You blinked rapidly.

Tsukishima’s hand moved its way to cup your cheek in his palm. When he felt you trembling, the blond didn’t hesitate to turn the water back on to its hottest setting. Understanding that you couldn’t meet his gaze at that moment, the volleyball player used his free hand to lay your cheek against his chest. Then, he wrapped his other arm around your waist, pressing your body flush against his.

You shut your eyes, your heart aching in your chest. Your hands instinctively reached out to hold onto his biceps. You felt like a burden. The moment you felt a kiss on the top of your head, you broke.

“Kei, I don’t know what’s wrong with me,” you whispered in a desperate voice. Your vision became cloudy with tears once again. “I don’t know what I’m doing wrong. Why can’t I do anything right for once?” you whimpered. Your throat began to ache from holding in your cries.

Tsukishima felt your shoulders trembling in his arms. In response, he held you tighter to his chest, his large hand reassuringly grazing up and down your bare back. A quiet sigh of relief left his lips when your body relaxed from his touch.

“First, it was an argument with my mom. You know how she’s always been about us living together,” you mumbled. Your shoulders relaxed when you felt the low vibrations of your boyfriend’s chuckle in his chest.

“Trust me,” the blond mused. “I know.” The memory of your mother throwing a temper tantrum the day you and him officially moved into your shared apartment was burned into his memory.

Even though tears were dripping down your chin and your sniffling had returned, a small smile made its way to your face. Tsukishima didn’t have to use his words to make you feel understood.

You cleared your throat, the smile slowly fading. “And then it was my boss. I-I understand why he was upset. I mean, it was my fault for forgetting about the deadline. But I just…” your grip on his biceps tightened and you sighed. “I hate knowing that I’ve let people down. I really don’t mean to.” Your voice cracked.

Momentarily, your boyfriend pulled your face away from his chest. The sounds of your whimpering made his chest ache. Using the pads of his thumbs, he wordlessly wiped from under your eyes and gave you a sweet kiss on the forehead. Your eyes responded by welling up with a new batch of tears.

“Kei,” you breathed out. “Kei, you’re gonna make me cry even more.” You whined and felt your bottom lip tremble. With his large palms now cupping your face, Tsukishima only smiled softly down at you.

“So cry then. Let it all out, Y/N.” As soon as Tsukishima’s words registered in your head, golden brown eyes watched as tears leaked from your eyes that he loved so much. His thumbs held your head in place gently, his lips moving on their own to kiss both of your tear streaked cheeks, ignoring the salty taste on his lips. In that moment, Tsukishima only cared about making you feel better.

“It’s okay to cry. And it’s okay to have bad days. But it’s not okay to keep all of these emotions to yourself. Why do you think you have me, you dummy?,” the blond gently chided, his lips pursed together when you grinned. After a pause, he continued.

“I know that I’ve been really busy with work and I’m sorry.”

“Tsukki, you don’t have to apologize—”

The pointed stare your boyfriend gave you halted your words. When you fell silent, Tsukishima gently grazed his knuckles on your cheek. His eyes never left yours.

“But nothing is more important to me than you. Work can wait, you come first. You always will.” Tsukishima’s hands reached behind you to grab your strawberry scented shampoo. The two of you fell silent for a second, the only sound being your sniffling and the water tumbling down the drain. When your boyfriend poured some shampoo onto his palm, his fingers working to lather the substance into your hair, you swore your heart was going to burst. It was only the sound of Tsukishima clicking his tongue that brought you back to reality.

“I know you well enough to know that you’ve been calling yourself a burden or some shit like that, so stop it.” Tsukishima watched as your cheeks reddened from the truth of his words. He let out a small sigh, amused at the fact that he was correct, but upset that you viewed yourself as one. The idea of you putting yourself down over inevitable events didn’t sit right with him.

The feeling of his fingers lathered in shampoo against your scalp released the tension in your body, the scent of strawberry filling your nostrils and the silky sound of his voice filling up a void within you that had been empty just before. It was as if Tsukishima was picking up your broken pieces, placing them back together again.

“But trust me. You’re far from being a burden. If anything...” the blond trailed off, gesturing for you to rinse the shampoo out of your hair. Leaning your head back, you let the water wash the shampoo off. Tsukishima already had conditioner in his palm, ready to loosen the tangles in your hair.

“If anything,” he continued. “You’re the best thing that has ever happened to me.” Tsukishima admitted. The blond could feel heat rise to his cheeks, but he didn’t care. His long, calloused fingers worked their magic on the tips of your hair first.

“My favorite part of the day is waking up by your side in the morning.” Untangling your hair, then rinsing. “Every time you kiss me, I fall in love all over again like an idiot.” A peck on your forehead. “I love teasing the hell out of you, only because I know you secretly like it.” A smirk and a gentle spank on your butt. You pouted playfully.

“But holding you as we fall asleep,” Tsukishima breathed out, his forehead against yours. “The feeling of having you in my arms every single night?” His voice was a drug and you couldn’t get enough.

Your attention was only on Tsukishima. You didn’t even feel that the water was slowly growing colder. You wouldn’t care even if you noticed. You had the love of your life keeping you warm and that’s all that mattered.

“Knowing that you need me, just as much as I need you… You’re the only person I’d go soft for, but you’re also the best thing I could ever ask for, baby. Not even close to a burden.” You felt Tsukishima’s hand intertwine with yours, fingers locked together.

“I love you so much, Y/N. This will never change.”

You’ve heard Tsukishima tell you that he loved you hundreds of times. The love confessions often paired with either his famous smug smile, the sad eyes Tsukishima only showed to you after a rough day, or the tired tone in bed after a heated argument, after the two of you would apologize; both of you never went to bed angry.

Hearing Kei Tsukishima, the man with a sharp tongue who was known to conceal his true feelings, remind you of how much you meant to him and feeling him hold you so closely, your body moved before you could think.

Grabbing hold of his neck from behind with your free hand, you pulled the blond into a deep kiss. Tsukishima didn’t hesitate to reciprocate, his hands running through your wet, now silky hair as he pulled you closer by the waist. You tilted your head to the side, feeling his nose brush against yours as he deepened the kiss.

You were on cloud nine.

It was a long moment later when you pulled away, out of breath and cheeks ablaze. You quickly used your thumb to wipe away the small string of saliva on your bottom lip, embarrassed at how forward you had behaved. Tsukishima only had a smug smirk on his now swollen lips, his tongue poking out to lick at the corner of his mouth. He chuckled when you wordlessly buried your face in his chest. The blond immediately wrapped his arms around your smaller frame, resting his chin on top of your head.

“I’d rather have you give me a sloppy kiss like that than see you crying, moron. Thank god you’re cute though, even if your eyes are puffy.”

You groaned into his chest, spanking his butt out of spite. His sudden jolt made you smirk.

“I love you Kei, but please shut up.”

“Mm, I don’t really feel like it.”

༺♥༻

What once was steamy hot water had soon turned cold by the time you and Tsukishima left the shower. Freshly clean and your tears completely washed away by the water and your boyfriend’s sweet kisses, you were now dry, wearing the blond’s large olive green t-shirt and a pair of black panties.

Tsukishima had gone to the living room to make sure the doors and windows were locked, telling you to get comfortable in bed. Only in his grey sweatpants, the blond didn’t feel like wearing his shirt. You definitely didn’t mind.

On the edge of your bed, your pile of clothing from earlier was placed in a laundry basket, only to be replaced by the plastic bags you had seen on the coffee table the moment you entered your apartment. A very familiar scent was coming from whatever was inside and your stomach growled in anticipation.

No way, you wondered with wide eyes. Did he…?

“Did you really think I’d let you go to bed hungry?”

Your head swiveled back to face your favorite blond. There Tsukishima stood with plates in one hand, water bottles gathered in his other arm. Your excitement must have been evident on your face because your boyfriend gave you an authentic, loving smile, all signs of smugness gone.

“Baby,” your fingers happily toyed with the plastic bag’s tied handle. “Did you get curry buns?”

Tsukishima made his way over to you, settling the plates down on the bed. Then, he lifted his hand to gently flick your forehead. “Why don’t you open the boxes and see for yourself, hm?”

༺♥༻

The humming sound of the fan in front of your bed blowing cool air into the room filled the air. Very faintly, you could still hear the crickets chirping outside when you lifted your head. Glancing at the nightstand, the clock beside Tsukishima’s glasses read that it was a bit past ten thirty.

With a stomach full of curry buns along with other side dishes your boyfriend so lovingly spoiled you with, you sighed contentedly. In a sleepy daze, you laid your head onto Tsukishima’s warm, bare chest and closed your eyes. Listening to the sound of his heartbeat was one of your favorite things to do when the two of you cuddled; you found it endearing and intimate. Although he’d never admit it, Tsukishima felt the same way.

A protective arm wrapped its way around your waist, Tsukishima’s long legs tangled with your own. His free hand played with the ends of your hair, twirling it repeatedly with his fingers. You began to feel even sleepier, the food coma making an entrance. You slowly blinked, then turned your head to look up at your boyfriend who had a ghost of a smile on his lips.

“You know I love you, right Kei?”

“If you didn’t, I wouldn’t have bought you curry buns, Y/N.”

Before you could give a sassy response, Tsukishima tilted your head to face him. Then, he gently pecked your lips twice.

“To make up for earlier. I’m sorry I missed it when you came home. Never again,” he mumbled, using his hand to move strands of hair away from your face.

You giggled quietly, your face tickled by his blonde hair that loomed over you. You loved it when he was physically affectionate. “Thank you for loving me, Kei,” you whispered. Your eyes were fixated on his, his pupils dilated in the room’s soft yellow lighting. “I love you. So damn much.”

With a kiss to his nose, you readjusted yourself so you could snuggle into Tsukishima’s chest. The volleyball player leaned over to turn the night lamp off before placing the blanket over the two of you, the scent of your strawberry shampoo creating butterflies in his stomach. When he looked down at you for the last time that night, you were already sound asleep with your arm securely wrapped around his torso.

Sure, the majority of your day consisted of mostly negatives. And yes, you had to say goodbye to your new blouse. Coffee stains on white were a done deal. But it wasn’t as if you couldn’t order a new one. Your boss would eventually get over your flaw at work; you’d compensate somehow and get back on track. And when was your mother not upset with you? It was hard, but it was worth it if that meant living with Tsukishima. Your mom would eventually come to terms with the fact that you were twenty three, almost twenty four. You were an adult after all; days like this were normal.

But at the end of the day, Tsukishima was always going to be there for you. Despite the difficulties you faced and the many downfalls that were yet to come, you knew that Kei was going to be there to hold you when you fell asleep. You’d do the same for him if it was the last thing you ever did.

Your faint breathing and the whirring fan were the only audible sounds in the room. With his golden brown eyes threatening to flutter shut, Kei Tsukishima gave one last glance at his cabinet across the room. Inside the third drawer underneath his volleyball practice clothes, sat a black velvet box with a diamond ring waiting to be worn on your left ring finger.

A smile formed on the blond’s lips when he leaned over to kiss the top of your sleeping head one last time before dozing off. He truly couldn’t wait to ask you to marry him when the time was just right. But for now, it was already the end of the day. Regardless, Kei Tsukishima was excited to share a new beginning with you.

#tsukishima x reader #tsukishima x y/n #tsukki x reader #tsukishima #haikyu x reader #haikyu #tsukishima angst #tsukishima fluff #haikyu angst #haikyu fluff #karasuno

327 notes · View notes

sunnyoldbear · 4 years ago

Text

Luca Headcanons Part 3!

I can’t fucking stop please someone help me

Luca:

All seamonsters have a lot of fish qualities and different sea monsters take on different fish qualities, even within a family.

While Luca isn’t as equipped to handle the deep as his uncle is, his father does have some traits that would help him out. Luca doesn’t know this, but he can survive deeper pressure than most others can. Like, significantly deeper, but not to the point of the Deep. He’s have to get accustomed to it and he might not have even survived.

His species can also echolocate! He also doesn’t know he can do this even though it’s from his mom’s side. He just thinks he clicks and squeaks when he’s happy, he doesn’t know he can also echolocate. Since, again, he hasn’t been to the Deep, the ability is very diluted and he can’t locate things very far but… he can, if he tries hard enough. He won’t, though, cause he just thinks his clicks and squeaks are just that.

He loses his shit when he finds out about dinosaurs. He loves them.

If you even mention a museum he will practically beg to go and he will be in there from opening to closing and still come back for more. He takes in every bit of information he possibly can

He doesn’t flip people off, he just sticks his tongue out

Cloud watches! He thinks it’s cute :)

Is cold blooded. They found this out when he passed out in the middle of class one day during the winter. Winter months are very hard for him at school because of it, so he treasures the break and stays under a bunch of warm blankets.

Talks with his hands a lot

One day when he was swimming to the surface after seeing his family, a fisherman who wasn’t too approving of sea monsters tossed their harpoon at him. It grazed his arm and it hurt like hell, but he still tried to hide it. Of course, since he was clutching his arm and there was blood between his fingers, the Marcovaldos panicked and healed him tot he best of their ability, but Luca simply smiled, turned to Alberto, and said “look, we match now!” (If you see Alberto standing beside Luca so that their scarred arms touch since they’re on opposite arms, no you didn’t)

He finds out about bubble wands and thinks they’re the coolest thing!

Avoids every kid named “Bruno” at school like the plague because he doesn’t want them to think he hates them

Whenever something cool happens he instinctively turns to tell Alberto and his face drops when he doesn’t see him

Definitely the kid to accidentally say “mom” (and)or “I love you” to a teacher and then stare in horror

Grabs Alberto’s arm, wrist, or hand when they’re doing something together if he’s not grabbed first just so they don’t lose each other. It’s just instinct.

Once sobbed for an hour because he saw a dead frog in a pool

Falls asleep if his hair is played with

Still gets made fun of for smelling like fish but due to being a fish he can’t really bathe so Giulia and her mom just spray him with perfume. It makes him feel better.

Forgives Guido and Ciccio with no hesitation, will never forgive Ercole. In fact, he’s terrified of Ercole.

Technically canon, but he is the biggest mama’s boy. She learns from her mistakes and fixes her relationship with him and he becomes super close to her

Only lets those close to him call him “Bubble” like his grandma does

Loses his mind when he sees fireflies

He keeps his hair pretty short

Refuses to eat fish

Is more of a prey fish

That being said, he develops a few survival markings, such as a spot on one of his fins to look like eyes

For some reason I feel like he’d be like clownfish and be able to swim through anemone without getting zapped

Was never good at making friends. The Branzino kid often tried to befriend him but he was too scared of disappointing his parents since Daniela and Mrs. Branzino don’t get along

Wears a seashell anklet

His grandma taught him to read secretly when he was little

Never stops talking. Never.

In class, he’s always the kid raising his hand, even if he doesn’t know the answers, just because of his eagerness

Calls Alberto all the time, more than he calls his family

Carries Alberto’s drawing with him everywhere. Used to be in his pockets and then transferred to his wallet.

Is definitely more of a writer than an artist! With his vivid imagination he can write for days, and Alberto is more than happy to draw them out for him

Lets his hair grow out a bit towards the end of his final school year. The stress of school means he doesn’t quite care for his appearance

Can’t sit still. When he’s at school he’s always fiddling with something but when he’s in Portorosso he just grabs Alberto’s hand and plays with his fingers

Definitely a teacher’s pet

Gets bullied a lot. You can’t expect the world to just be okay with sea monsters overnight. A lot of the world will never accept him. There are kids that make his life a living hell at school.

As much as he loves school, he aches to be free sometimes

Gets super flustered super fast

Sits at Alberto’s side and talks about anything and everything and Alberto will sketch it

His scales are more like a duck’s water-resistant feathers. Water rolls right off.

Loves taking Nerone for walks

Definitely wears skirts and dresses in secret! He just thinks they’re neat :)

Loves romance movies but will never admit it

Literally bites his tongue to hold back from rambling. Giulia and Alberto constantly have to tell him it’s okay and he can talk all he wants, but he’s bullied so often for talking too much that he still holds back if he catches himself

Alberto:

Similar to a Betta Fish! His kind of sea monster aren’t known for bonding well and tend to fight.

When healthy, his scales are long and gorgeous just like a Betta’s! (Giulia is mesmerized by them)

You know how dolphins get high with puffer fish? It’s not just dolphins.

His teeth are a little sharper than most other sea monsters. Yes, he bares them at Ercole every time they see each other. No, he won’t stop

Definitely the “he ask for no pickles” friend

No one knows what he’s talking about half the time except for Luca, Giulia, and (sometimes) Massimo. They just kinda go with it.

Has his own words for everything. Only Luca and Giulia know what he means.

He’s actually super, duper close to Giulia, but they do fight pretty often. They’re siblings.

Likes to put his hat on Luca

Everyone thinks he’d be a bad flirt/get flustered super easily but the opposite is true! He’s a big flirt! He just knows what to say to make others fluster around him! Even if he’s not into you, if your his age or he’s trying to charm you, he’ll flirt up a storm. Living on your own from such a young age means you need to pick up survival tactics, and charm and streetsmarts were the ones he picked up.

Sometimes he faces small boats he sees just for the fun of it

He also sometimes grabs a rope or a net from Massimo’s boat when they’re fishing and just zooms to land to get them there quicker

Loves playing games with the kids when he’s on lifeguard duty, even if it can get him in trouble with his boss

You better bet he makes fun of those school uniforms. He laughs his ass off. He thinks they’re the funniest things.

If he sees or hears even a hint of danger, he is shoving his loved ones behind him and will protect them with his life.

Prefers to be barefoot

Heals surprisingly fast. Something about them fish genes.

When he’s fifteen he jokingly tells Luca he should become a teacher and then Luca’s eyes get all big and excited and Alberto regrets opening his mouth. But he still supports him every step of the way.

Whenever he hears Luca click or chirp, he calls out for him if he’s a distance away or grabs his hand since he recognizes it as echolocation before Luca does

More of a predator fish

Keeps his hair long and growing

I think he’d probably grow a mustache. Giulia hates it so much which is why he keeps it. Okay, he kept it to annoy her, but then he actually started to like it. But when Luca said he liked it, that solidified it

He’s so strong it’s kinda scary. Definitely stronger than the average fisherman, but was stronger even beforehand.

Sometimes just eats fish live and terrifies those around him

He’s super fast! Since he’s based on a tuna or swordfish, he’s pretty quick

Unlike Luca, he’s warm blooded. So when he heard Luca has to keep really warm during winters, he offers most of his clothes

His father abandoning him may seem cruel, but for his kind of sea monsters, it was what had to happen. Still, Alberto is a child and it shouldn’t happen.

Mainly a night eater

Can see further than most of his fishy friends

Good night vision too!

Was taught to read and write as a kid by his father but it’s not perfect so he asks Massimo to do it

Loves playing cards

Fins are sharper than average

Squishes Luca’s cheeks

Sword fights with Giulia except they’re sticks

Whenever Luca falls asleep on him (often), he just stays still and refuses to move

Scoops Luca up sometimes

Grabs Luca’s face and blows raspberries instead of kissing it. (Can be interpreted as platonic or romantic!! Italians kiss on cheeks as greetings)

Protectively wraps his tail around those he loves

Water clings to him a bit more since his built-for-speed scales are less water repellent

Every year he gets scared Luca won’t return

Paints the Hideout to look like Luca’s dream fish-stars after he’s told about it. The ceiling, anyway. Don’t ask how he did it, no one knows.

Changes his last name to Marcovaldo

Thinks pet fish and aquariums are hilarious and will poke fun at the fish (“haha, losers! No freedom!” “Alberto!” “What?!”)

LOVES DINOSAURS

He and Luca share a bed when Luca comes over!

The Vespa poster hangs in his room on his door

Calls Luca’s nightlights “light fish” as a nod to stars

Has Giulia and Luca’s names tattooed onto him because they’re his best friends

Tried to take Caligola and Machiavelli on walks… yeah that goes as well as you think

Giulia:

Is a fast reader

Isn’t a massive poetry fan but does have a few favorites

Also keeps a few drawings from Alberto in her folders

Also scoops Luca up randomly

Can and will bite you

Wears dresses as much as she does shorts

Ties her hair up when serious

Rubs her nose against her family’s as a sign of love. It’s just something she did as a kid, so sometimes she’ll just rub her nose against Alberto’s and he gets really confused

Is low key a little jealous of her brother and best friend being sea monsters

Is a bit of a builder! She makes a bridge from her room to the treehouse

Rarely starts fights with Alberto, but she’ll sure finish them

Half regrets teaching Alberto to swear

Though she seems pretty calm, she’s gotten into her fair share of fights at school. Mainly punches kids who bully her and/or Luca. Also sexists.

Although this is 1950/60s Italy, I imagine she’d be very accepting of homosexuality and not hide it, even if rumors of her being one start spreading and she gets hurt. She has a strong sense of justice and she doesn’t care about consequences.

She’s the only person allowed to make fun of Alberto. No one else is. She’ll quite literally attack anyone who dares.

Her parents were surprised she didn’t take after them in fishing or painting

Honestly I can see her mentoring the kids for the race every summer! Once she hits 18 and is no longer able to compete, she holds practice sessions and loves seeing the kids have fun

She definitely runs the race when she’s older. She moves to Portorosso since her marine biology career is helped by her sea monster brother and the town’s closeness to water

Teaches the boys to make sandcastles

Holds such strong resentment for Alberto’s father and Daniela. Lorenzo and Luca’s grandmother she’s fine with, but Alberto’s biological father abandoning him pisses her off more than she can put into words, and Daniela manipulating her son and sending him away makes her want to break something.

Her “santa (cheese)!” comments slowly change into “Santa (fish)!” exclamations. Like, “Santa Goby!” for example.

Is more close to Alberto than he wants to let people know. She can read him like a book. He’s honestly her best friend. She tells him everything, they go to each other after nightmares, they share everything, all the fun cute stuff that Alberto would rather die than admit.

Still has no idea what “Silenzio Bruno” and “Piacere, girolamo trombetta” mean and at this point she’s too afraid to ask

Though she loves the Portorosso kids, she’d rather die than be a mother. Her parents understand, but secretly hope she changes her mind so they can spoil a grandbaby.

Begs Massimo to coverup his sea monster tattoo, which he does

Also a “he ask no pickles” friend!

Is super patient with Luca and Alberto’s adaption to the human world (though she doesn’t like it when Alberto shoves his feet on her-which he loves to do because it pisses her off)

Secretly saves money up for the boys to get a Vespa

While she isn’t the best cook, her pasta meals are pretty damn good!

Has the trophy from the Cup in her room next to a picture of the three of them on the Vespa

#Luca #luca movie #pixar luca #Luca Paguro #Alberto Scorfano #Giulia Marcovaldo #luca headcanons

73 notes · View notes

winedarkwords · 4 years ago

Text

Books like The Goldfinch:

None of these books are The Goldfinch 2.0, but they have elements that make up the flavour, you know?

A Home at the End of the World, Michael Cunningham; Fiction, lgbtq+:

Orphanhood. Unconventional friendships/love & found-family. New York. Traces two of the protagonists' lives from childhood through adulthood.

White Oleander, Janet Fitch; Fiction:

Very similar in terms of : writing-style, emphasis on art & beauty, setting, family, and specifically mother-daughter relationships. Trade Las Vegas for Las Angeles, gender-swap Theo, and (unfortunately…devastatingly) no Boris, but twice the misfortune = White Oleander. Warning: it has an almost A Little Life level of sadness and repetitive misfortune; the main character is in the foster-care system and every positive and negative aspect of that is explored. It’s an excellent book, but I can only read it once every 10 years for that reason (at least it has a happy ending).

A Little Life, Hanya Yanagihara; Fiction, lgbtq+:

You knew this one was coming. Some people despise this book, and I understand why. Come for: the found-family; deep friendships and an analyses of what it means to be in love or even have a relationship; a vivid, idealistic New York bursting with success and sparkling personalities; an in-depth appreciation for all art forms. Reasons not to read: so much sadness. How can so many terrible things happen to one person?! Also, certain characters die, and for what? You did this for what. Why.

Conversations with Friends, Sally Rooney; Fiction, lgbtq+:

Comparable in its exploration of unconventional friendships (are they dating? Are they not? Who can never be sure) and questions of what does it mean to be a family or how do we love people; not my favourite of Rooney’s, but needs to be mentioned. Also, the messiest, angstiest, narrator. So.

Tin Man, Sarah Winman; Fiction, lgbtq+

Don’t make me say it: Unconventional. Friendships. Also, Vincent Van Gogh and his Sunflowers play a role similar to Carol Fabricius and his Goldfinch. Plays with themes surrounding loss, and how art can save and connect us.

The Tsar of Love and Techno, Anthony Marra; Fiction:

I sobbed for 3 hours after finishing this. Please read it. It’s all about the power of art and human connection in devastating circumstances.

Nana, Ai Yazawa; Slice-of-Life, Shoujo:

HEAR ME OUT: Nana and Hachi. Very much co-dependent, homo-erotic best friends with wildly different personalities who love and are loyal to each other above anyone else. Yazawa also emphasizes found-family and art. If anything, please read this because it's one of my top 3 Not Guilty, Guilty Pleasures. The art, the drama, the powerful bonds and personalities, the humour....ok.

Call Down the Hawk, Maggie Stiefvater; YA, lgbtq+ :

Repressed handsome young man who wears boring suits and has an attic stocked with original art (it’s a mEtaPHor). Huge emphasis on the importance of art +self-expression; there are dates at museums and many discussions surrounding dead painters, fraud, and how to both literally and figuratively get away with murder. Some solid mommy & daddy issues.

Great Expectations, Charles Dickens; Fiction:

If you know, you know.

The Lonely Hearts Hotel, Heather O’Neill; Fiction:

Her style is reminiscent of The Night Circus, but the way she argues for the importance of childhood + how the characters are determined to make an innocent, happy space for themselves while desperately attempting to banish their trauma (physical & sexual abuse, orphanhood) through whatever means possible (drugs, sex, crime) is very, very, very Theodore Decker. Also, the imagery and wild characters share a similar vibe with The Goldfinch.

Wind, Sand and Stars, Antoine de Saint-Exupery; memoir, adventure, philosophy:

There’s a reason a whole section of The Goldfinch is named after this book. The way Saint-Exupery speaks of passion, pursuing a life beyond normalcy, comradeship, and loneliness hits just right.

(I came out with a list like this last year, but of course, Tumblr tore it into pieces and threw it into the internet abyss where no tagging system can find it. So. Welcome to the 2021 version.)

134 notes · View notes

ofchaotics · 2 years ago

Note

💕 ( avery & rue i BEG )

AVERY & MATEO . . .

How did they meet? at some industry party.... and mateo probably made a fool of himself

Who flirted with who first? mateo...... stumbling and drunk azheo

Was it love at first sight or a slowburn romance? can i say both???? CAN I SAY BOTH???? he didn’t admit it to himself for a while but... it was there..

Did they start dating right away or were they friends before things became romantic? they’ve always had a ...... questionable dynamic even as friends

What was their first date? why do i wanna say it was the night she came over and mateo played her a song he wrote for her . .. . . . . . . bc . .. . . . sobs

What are their favourite things to do on date nights? wreck havoc. ruin people’s days.

Do they still go on dates after being together for a while? all the time... he be wining and dining this woman consistently .

What is their love language? chaos and bullying

Who kissed who first? i wanna say avery.... just bc... big top energy

Who started the relationship? mateo....

Monogamy or Polyamory? mateo too hostile to share avery SAWWWRRYYY

Are they/do they plan on getting married? yes <3

Who proposed? Was it a yes or no? mateo gonna propose n she betta SAY YES !

Do they want kids? Who brought it up first? mateo does, but he’s made peace with it potentially never happening................

Do they already have kids, together or from previous relationships? negative

Do they have any routines/rituals in their relationship? chaos and havoc.... but no fr i feel like they do their skincare routines side by side every night and every morning......... cute..

How do they take care of each other when they are sick/hurt? they really do baby the shit out of each other whenever the other feels bad.

How do they like to spend time together? concerts, art shows, museums, late night snack runs.

What are their favourite non-sexual forms of intimacy? hands in the hair, holding hands.

What are some of their favourite things about their partner? mateo is so violently obsessed with avery that everything about her has him giggling and swinging his feet, and i feel like the feeling is mutual LMFAO

How do they comfort the other when they are upset? they talk about it, or sit in silence in each other’s arms. group cry sessions yknow

Who buys the other spontaneous gifts? mateo.... so annoying about it....

What position do they sleep in? mateo always wants to be little spoon but his tall ass is usually the big spoon LMAO

Do they bathe/shower together? absolutely

Do they do anything else in the bath/shower other than wash? they do be fucking...

In the bedroom - Vanilla, a little spice, or kinky af? HAHHAHAHAHAHAHA is this even a fucking question???????

For applicable ships - who tops/bottoms? avery and her big top energy.... sometimes they switch it up... SOMETIMES...

For applicable ships - who is more dominant/submissive? girl is this even a question bye

What is their favourite sex position? mateo biased as hell . . . . anytime he’s just getting his shit rocked amen

Do either of them enjoy bringing sex toys into the bedroom? ...... yes......

Favourite place to have sex? anywhere and everywhere rip

Most adventurous place they’ve had sex? they be fuckin everywhere.... be fr.....

How often do they fight? What about? not very often lmfao and it’s probably just over extremely trivial or mundane things .

Have they ever broken up? NEVA EVA!!!!

Messy breakup, amicable split, remain friends, ride or die or til death do us part? they’re endgame srry friend...

RUE & MATEO . . .

How did they meet? through dakota... probably at some party

Who flirted with who first? mateo lmfao

Was it love at first sight or a slowburn romance? mateo was whipped from the START

Did they start dating right away or were they friends before things became romantic? laughs violently.......... mateo invited himself into dakota and rue’s relationship

What was their first date? mateo taking her to some super lowkey screening for some movie.. like their first one on one date.. sob sob

What are their favourite things to do on date nights? also wrecking havoc and ruining people’s days

Do they still go on dates after being together for a while? their dates mostly consist of them getting high tbh

What is their love language? words of affirmation and physical touch

Who kissed who first? mateo :>

Who started the relationship? mateo........ pushy ass...

Monogamy or Polyamory? squints.. is this a question......

Are they/do they plan on getting married? they’d definitely have to flee to utah or something

Who proposed? //

Do they want kids? Who brought it up first? neither one of them is ready for that yet LMFAO

Do they already have kids, together or from previous relationships? negative

Do they have any routines/rituals in their relationship? getting high and watching shitty horror movies, and bullying dakota.

How do they take care of each other when they are sick/hurt? mateo hovering over her every move making sure she’s okay, bringing her food n washing her hair.........

How do they like to spend time together? parties and sleepovers, movie dates.

What are their favourite non-sexual forms of intimacy? mateo’s fav thing is when rue lays her head on his lap....... so cute....

What are some of their favourite things about their partner? mateo luvs rue’s sense of humor.... the way he just giggles at everything she says....

How do they comfort the other when they are upset? mateo’s always too willing to beat up anyone who upsets her, to which she has to calm him down and they just get high and forget about it.

Who buys the other spontaneous gifts? mateo bringing her weed and booze...... his token of affection...

What position do they sleep in? lanky ass mfers just limbs everywhere

Do they bathe/shower together? yes <3

Do they do anything else in the bath/shower other than wash? they, too, do be fucking...

In the bedroom - Vanilla, a little spice, or kinky af? AGAINNNNN IS THIS A QUESTION

For applicable ships - who tops/bottoms? mateo the top here i fear

For applicable ships - who is more dominant/submissive? once again.... mateo in his dom era

What is their favourite sex position? missionary just bc mateo likes looking at her <3

Do either of them enjoy bringing sex toys into the bedroom? ...... yes......

Favourite place to have sex? in his car LMFAO

Most adventurous place they’ve had sex? they be fuckin everywhere.... be fr.....

How often do they fight? What about? mateo more than likely gets upset with her if she gets too carried away with the drugs n shit

Have they ever broken up? never ever ever

Messy breakup, amicable split, remain friends, ride or die or til death do us part? they too are endgame <3

#regarding avery.#regarding rue.

5 notes · View notes

4aloysius-porteu · 4 years ago

Text

i am your ally || tsukishima kei.

pairing; tsukishima kei x f! reader

genre: oneshot, drama, flangst, a little comedy

word count: 5.6k

details: 3rd year Tsukishima, artist reader

warnings: reader going missing, verbal abuse, crushing of dreams, lots of sadness, heavy parental argument, everything that happens here hits home

synopsis: tsukishima didnt know what is the right thing to say after he heard of (y/n)’s situation, but the words that stumbled out from his mouth were a surprise, yet it blossomed to a meaningful talk that happens once in a blue moon.

(a/n): wrote in the middle of my depressing days to find a little comfort from this character that I love with all my heart. inspired by true situations irl; if you, my friend, is feeling down today, i hope reading this work of mine can help. i might make this into a full story if this got enough attention tho.

(Y/N) was nowhere to be found.

It wasn't Tsukishima's habit to eavesdrop on other people's conversation, but he couldn't help but listen when he heard her name from her classmates. She was a consistent top student that will never neglect her studies, so it was unusual to know that she was absent today. He thought that maybe she got sick or she decided to go crazy and skip school. If it was the latter, he hoped that she knows what she's doing, because midterms are coming in 3 days, and he's not going to listen to her whines and begs to help her study for the tests.

And now he just happened to overhear that she was missing.

He saw her parents walk out of the campus after talking to the vice-principal and to the teachers. Gossip filled the corridors and rooms. Tsukishima went back to his room, clearly annoyed with the unnecessary noise.

He listened to the lectures of each subject and continued to write down important points, but the thought of (Y/N) lingered in his head. What could've happened that led to her disappearance? Was she kidnapped? No, he just walked her home last night and she'll never leave her place past midnight. Kidnappers won't dare to make a move in daylight because of the town's high authority visibility. There's no way she'll be lost in an area she's very familiar with.

She ran away from home. That is the only logical possibility he could come up with, but he couldn't think of an idea as to why. (Y/N), who loves to be cooped up in her room with music blaring in her earphones while drawing, left her home without a trace. Tsukishima was a little worried, but he won't let his face show whatever the hell he's feeling.

His plays and blocks aren't exactly bad, but Yamaguchi could sense that Tsukishima was thinking of something other than the volleyball practice. He approached his friend who was resting on the floor, his long arms covering his curled up legs.

"Tsukki, what's with that expression? Did you get a failing score in a quiz?" Yamaguchi started, in an attempt to lighten up the atmosphere.

The blonde's eyes darted to him, "Like hell, I'm going to let that happen. What do you want?"

He shrugged, "Nothing, I just noticed that you were a little quieter and more passive today. Normally, you would've chewed the first years out with their simple blocking errors, but you didn't say a thing. You're scarier in their eyes when you're silent."

"I was tired. I'll only waste my voice pointing out something I did a million times." A sigh escaped his lips

"Right..." Yamaguchi paused, "So, I assume you have heard?"

"Heard of what?"

"That (Y/N) is missing."

"Oh," A frown fell on his features. It wasn't his usual frown. People who really know him would notice that his eyes are full of worry.

He sat beside Tsukishima before he spoke again. "I know you have ideas on places (Y/N) could've gone to."

"I do not know what you're talking about."

The latter chuckled, "Oh, humor me, Tsukki. If you're that worried, I can excuse you for today's practice. No problem."

"Does that mean that you aren't concerned?"

"I am concerned. I want to look for her as well, but I have to whip the other players into shape. I'm sorry if I couldn't accompany you right away."

Tsukishima stood up and sighed again, "You will excuse me, you said?"

"Yeah."

There were silence and the background noise of balls and shoes colliding on the floor. He wiped the sweat off his face before replying, "I'll be leaving the gym in a few minutes."

He changed his clothes and packed his things up, causing the team to exchange glances.

"Tsukki!" Yamaguchi called, throwing his friend's large jacket to him, which the other caught. "Take care! I hope you find (Y/N) and get her home safe."

"I wish. Then, I'll leave it to you, Captain."

The green-haired middle blocker's eyes teared up and sparkled as he beamed a smile back, "I got it!"

Tsukishima started to look for (Y/N) at the places she liked to go to; the art store, the Central Park, the kid's playground, the museum, and the prefectural library. But there was no sign of her anywhere. He looked at the nearby places to no avail. He walked on while dialing her number, but her phone is out of coverage area. He spent 3 more hours finding the girl and soon received a message from Yamaguchi, telling him that (Y/N) hasn't been found yet and that he joined the authorities to help them find her.

He walked back to the direction of his home, panting softly. He had failed to find (Y/N), yet his brain won't stop thinking about her possible whereabouts. The cool breeze of winter hit Tsukishima's face and shivered at the contact. He had hoped again that she is inside of an establishment, safe from such cold weather.

Tsukishima's home has its lights out. Her mother was invited into her colleagues' reunion as said in her text, and both his father and brother are busy at work. He reached for his key in his pocket and was opening the door, not until he heard a loud sob from somewhere. Tsukishima looked around the place as the sobbing continued. He searched for the source and ended up in their backyard. He caught the sight of a small figure behind the bushes and went closer to confirm.

It was a cat. It had scurried away once he got close to it. Oh, how stupid he is to get his hopes up only to find a scared animal. But he was certain he heard a sob somewhere near. And cats aren't capable of making a sound like that. Or maybe he was only hearing things?

He dragged his feet to the main door to unlock it, but this time, there was a loud noise of scrubbing on the roof. What is it this time? He moved back and looked upon where it came from.

To his surprise, it wasn't another cat but a person. Their legs were curled up, arms covered around them, with their chin on their knees. Tsukishima turned on his phone's flashlight and there she was.

It was (Y/N). Her shoulders shook, either from the cold or trying her best not to cry out loud.

"H-Help me."

He stared at the girl, confused and fighting back laughter because of how scared (Y/N) looked. "How the heck did you get in there?"

"I climbed that tree and jumped off to break in and hide in your room. Turned out that the windows are locked. I don't know how to jump back and I-I was too high from the ground. You know I'm scared of heights! Why did you lock the window?! Stupid!"

"Of course, I would lock the window for the security. And wow, aren't you the stupid one for knowing how to climb and jump up to my window and not knowing how to get down? Why did you climb if you are scared of heights? Such an idiot."

"Fine, fine. I am an idiot. Now, can you help me get off this roof?"

He crossed his arms and smirked, "No."

"Ugh! Please, Kei. I've been trapped here for hours. I am begging you to help me get down. Please?"

He sighed in defeat and raised his arms. "Here. Jump."

For seconds, (Y/N) didn't respond as she was having second thoughts about jumping.

"What? Do you expect me to get a ladder? I'm sorry, but it's in the basement, broken." He said in a mocking tone. "Don't you want to come down?"

"Can you catch me properly? Are your arms stable? Won't you fall on your ass?" (Y/N) interrogated.

Tsukishima rolled his eyes, "Alright, stay there and freeze to death."

"No, wait! I was just asking! Come back! Don't leave meeee!"

The blonde looked up to her and raised his arms again, "Don't think. Trust me, I will catch you properly and you won't crash to the ground. You weigh like nothing anyway."

"Are you talking about yourself?" She retorted, pertaining to his weight.

"Can you please just jump?"

(Y/N) inhaled and went to the edge of the roof. It was a scary view for her, just looking down makes her dizzy, and want to throw up. She thought he would have the largest frown on his face because of how irritatingly slow she was, but there was Tsukishima waiting for her with the calmest expression. She smiled a little.

"Here I go..."

She took off, closing her eyes, and swallowing her fears. The gravity pulled her feet down shortly after, and Tsukishima readied himself for the impact as he reached her waist. He held on to her lower torso while (Y/N) placed her arms around his shoulders tightly and legs on his waist. The athlete's balance slightly went off, so he took a step back to support both their weights. It was now steady.

"I'm surprised you didn't lose your balance. Where's the weak boned beanpole 3 years ago?"

"I did for a second."

"Doesn't matter. You caught me. Thank you."

They had stayed in that way for a moment until Tsukishima spoke, "Do you plan to get off?"

"No. I'm tired."

"I am too." Yet she refused to let go.

He exhaled, carrying (Y/N) to the main entrance and finally unlocking the door. Her hoodie was cold and some parts are wet, but it didn't rain on that day. He took her in and placed her on the couch. Tsukishima went to his room, changed clothes, and brought a spare sweatshirt, handkerchief, and a towel. He went down but didn't find (Y/N) where he left her, so he walked to the kitchen counter and found the girl on the corner, shivering like a pup.

He tossed the clothing at her without further words. There was a note from her mom beside the curry in the table, saying she had eaten and she left rolls in the refrigerator. He was about to turn on the stove to reheat the food his mother left, but his eyes landed on (Y/N) who sat quietly, hugging the sweatshirt instead of wearing it. Her hair was disheveled, the sleeves and neck part of her hoodie was damp, her nose was red and her puffy, bloodshot eyes implied that she has been crying for who knows how long. He set the pan down to get her a glass of water.

"Everyone was looking for you." Said Tsukishima.

"No one was really looking for me." (Y/N) replied, clearing her nose.

"I didn't spend the last 3 hours tiring myself to scan the whole town for no reason." He sat beside her, handing the glass. "Care to spill the tea?"

(Y/N) drank first before speaking weakly, "I hate them. So much."

The male remained quiet, waiting for her to continue her dilemma.

"Remember when I told you and the class that I will be the most successful doctor in Japan after I finished my studies? It was a lie. It wasn't my dream to stay in a hospital and treat ill people, I only wanted to draw and paint. I didn't care if it never made them or anyone happy, I am happy doing it. And they are taking it away from me."

He knew from the start that her dream job as a doctor wasn't true. For years she stayed close to him as a friend or more, she won't blabber anything of the medical topic. She was terrified of syringes. He saw her reading an article about surgeries and like, but her focus was easily taken away.

She will get a pencil then start scribbling and drawing. Something that Tsukishima always sees her doing whenever she has a pen and paper, but she insists that it was a mere hobby. Her notebooks are well designed and organized, but the back is always full of artistic doodles instead of algebra solutions. She only has very few art materials yet she can make a portrait with only her fingers to shade. She makes digital art without a stylus. She would drag him to the museum after class to view some western and eastern paintings or any work of art while he admires the dinosaur fossils. For times she's watching an art tutorial and talk about art, draw and paint, she has those stupid sparkles in her eyes and a huge smile on her face.

"You know Tsukishima, after I finish studying and became a doctor, I'll become an artist and if the time let's it, I'll open my own art gallery. That's my ultimate dream." She looked alive and delighted.

Very much the opposite of what she looks like right now.

Even though she was a slave of art, as Tsukishima was a slave of his own interests, (Y/N) prioritized her studies so much. He understood why when he went to her house and met her parents before their study sessions. He had noticed everything but chose to stay quiet.

"I-I was drawing last night. Dad entered my room but I didn't notice so he ripped the music away from my ears and yelled. He said that I would always lock myself in my room and draw every night. It was never-ending and irritates the shit out of him. He asked why would I do something so useless that isn't even connected to any academic subject. He was looking down on my art like he was looking at a piece of crap. He told me to stop and threatened me if I didn't. Why would I get punished for drawing? I couldn't get myself to stay silent so I retorted. If he doesn't want to see me drawing, then he shouldn't enter my room at all. He should stop meddling with my hobbies. His anger only went up."

(Y/N) stopped for a while to wipe her tears and snot with her sleeves but Tsukishima placed a handkerchief on her hands. She muttered her thanks and blew her nose and soon followed with a sneeze.

"Soon, it became a full-blown argument. He said that he was checking out if I was doing my projects, but oh he was so disappointed only to find his daughter drawing for nothing. What the heck? I gave them the best grades I could get, and part of it was because of you, Tsukishima, but they still aren't satisfied? I balanced drawing and academics, but they made it seem that all I was doing was my hobby, completely ignoring my efforts at school. I finished the school activities and I reviewed for midterms and all I want is to be left alone and draw. What, they want me to go crazy by studying every hour with things I won't even apply in real life?"

Her fake laughter echoed in the kitchen for seconds before her depressed tone took over again.

"Mom heard all the shouting and joined the argument. Of course, she sided with dad without listening to my feelings and there they ridiculed their youngest child's interests and talent. They told me that everything I do is bullshit and wrong, that I was useless, that I was the huge opposite of their expectations, and... and how come God gave them a joke. She said they raised me so that I could help them, not to do such useless things. It hurts to shout back but I did to explain why I'm so passionate about art in hopes that they will listen and understand but, I was so wrong. I was suddenly slapped..." She placed her hand to her left cheek, her lips quivered a little.

"I-It stung so much. Mom complained about how the Internet generation is so rebellious and won't listen to the elders. They didn't raise and teach me to talk back at them, but here is their child being a bitch. They started comparing me to my elder siblings or relatives who focused on their studies and who are at the door of success. I know they only want me to achieve the best, but my success isn't up to them! It's on me!! And I've invested a lot for that! They shouted at me as mom pulled my hair. It was so loud I thought I was going deaf. Dad blamed the gadget's influence and my drawings. I have only drawn decent fanarts of fictional characters, people, and sceneries, but they believed that because of these, I turned into a mannerless bastard. So mom decided to get my phone and lessen my allowance so that I wouldn't buy any art materials that are a waste of fortune--"

She bit her lower lip that is trembling uncontrollably and her eyesight blurred as her fat tears got in the way.

"and... D-Dad... he... he... he tore m-my sketch pad apart..."

Tsukishima's eyes widened. (Y/N) brought that thing with her almost everywhere she went and it was filled with good drawings and art plans. She has a lot of them though, but Tsukishima could only imagine how she felt when her efforts were trampled over by someone important to her.

(Y/N) broke down, bawled her eyes out, and shrieked hysterically. He looked at her with a heavy heart. He had seen her crying sometimes, be it because of a sad movie or empathy, but never like this. A depressed, emotional wreck. Her eyes were sore enough after a lot of hours, but she won't stop crying. It was heartbreaking to see and hear his significant other in this state, yet Tsukishima didn't know what is the right thing to say.

But maybe there was no need to say anything at all.

Kei wrapped his arms around her weeping figure and pulled her towards him. Cry it out, pipsqueak. (Y/N) didn't expect this action, nonetheless cried in his shoulder He didn't care anymore if this meant he gets his clothes drenched in her snot and tears as long as she felt a little less lonely. He rubbed her back and hair in an attempt to comfort his lover. (Y/N)'s airways hurt, but she screamed the pain out, in hopes that the pain in her heart would vanish. Her weeping went on for long minutes until she choked in her own sobs that Tsukishima had to get her another glass of water.

"Tell me, Kei." She began, wiping her eyes, "Is there... something wrong with me? Is my dream really that insignificant?"

"There's nothing wrong with you. You followed your ideals. Anyone including me would've done the same." He answered beside her.

"I-It's realistic, right?"

"It is."

"Then... why did it turn out like this?" Her voice was cracking.

Tsukishima looked down, "The society is just very cruel."

"Yeah. It sure is. Such a cruel society to live with."

(Y/N) let out a dejected sigh and leaned on Tsukki's shoulder. "I couldn't look at them without such overwhelming fear and hate anymore. I wonder if... they knew that I was doing this for them. I'd like to make them smile with something I've made myself. Once, I made each of them a portrait. A realistic one made from a pencil. I couldn't afford a material set that can be used to paint realistically, but I tried my best to impress them with a charcoal one. Oh, if only you saw their faces when I gave them the portraits. They returned a half-hearted smile. It wasn't the same kind of joy I see whenever I give them perfect scores on tests. I didn't spend 3 sleepless nights just to see their half happy, half unpleased reaction. I wish they could feel more proud of their daughter who worked hard for them... I wonder if they threw it away as he did on my sketch pad..."

They let silence engulf the atmosphere for a while. (Y/N) had calmed down a little, despite shedding smaller tears from the side of her eyes. Tsukishima held the sweatshirt he gave her earlier to make her wear it on the top of her hoodie to lessen her shivering. He stared at her, while the other gazed down on the floor with dead eyes.

Tsukishima asked, "So, what are you going to do now?"

"What am I going to do now huh..." (Y/N) repeated. "I'll probably... put everything to an end."

"You know I won't let you."

"I'm not talking about my life, silly. I might stop drawing and all. I've lost it."

"Isn't your life and drawing one and the same? And I'm pretty sure you have that immense talent to continue."

"No... Besides, talent isn't a talent if it doesn't make anyone happy."

The blonde mentally scoffed. She just said that it makes her happy in the beginning.

"Oh? Fine, stop doing that one thing you put everything into. What would that girl you received a commission from would feel if she were to hear you though?"

(Y/N) was stunned. She had completely forgotten about the whole commission thing she opened in her social media accounts. Tsukishima accompanied (Y/N) on giving the commissioned charcoal portrait to a girl last 3 weeks ago. It was (Y/N)'s first commission for years she's making art. Someone liked her work for the first time and paid for it, and her client looks very contented and glad. The words she said filled her thoughts with inspiration.

"Wow, this is awesome! I'm so happy!! Thank you for making this, it was exactly what I've pictured on my mind! You're amazing! All the excitement I've bottled up for this day is so worth it," The girl, probably a little older than them paused and admired the painting she received from (Y/N).

"Would you ignore those words she said?"

'Please don't stop drawing, I'll be looking forward to your future works!'

A pang of guilt hit her chest. She wants to pursue art, but there are these shackles and chains on her limbs and around her neck that made it hard for her to move forward. She couldn't breathe. What happened yesterday night was too much. Her parents went overboard.

"B-But—"

A monotone voice interrupted her, "Don't. Never stop striving for something you have been building for years. You might be defeated now, but surely, you will win some time. There's no way you'll stay in the lowest level of the ladder after I saw how hard you worked. You will go to nationals again, and I will continue to support you. I'll cheer for you and stay by your side! So please, do not stop! Let me see those beautiful blocks that you execute in the game once more! And I will watch you reach the top! Doesn't matter how many times, I'll never get weary of watching you do amazing things!"

She was silenced by that statement. She had definitely heard those before, but couldn't quite remember where.

"Does the sentiment seem familiar to you? Those are the same words that came from your mouth when I was planning to quit volleyball after our huge loss to Date Tech last year. I am returning them back to you."

"Huh?" She replied with a meek voice.

"That time, you really did a good job meddling with my decisions. It annoyed me first, but what you had stated held a weight that I couldn't disregard. You gave me the small push I didn't know I needed. In the end, I'd like to pay you back." Tsukishima stated with a far away look in his eyes.

(Y/N) listened with watery eyes. This Tsukishima's side isn't definitely the one she gets to see every day so she couldn't feel anything but the warm, fuzzy feeling that is healing her heart.

"It's probably selfish for me to say this but, don't you dare give up. I didn't stop. No matter how long and hard the game is, no matter how tired and discouraged I get, and no matter how many pessimistic thoughts clouded my head, I didn't stop chasing after a falling ball and thinking of another tactic to counter the enemy. I kept your words with me in court. It was you who told me not to in the first place, and I'm not going to forgive you if you ever dropped everything. I won't let the stupid, starry-eyed (Y/N) die today."

The girl beside her started sobbing. "But you told me once that my drawing are ugly."

"Oh. That. I... kind of remember that. I'm not sorry about what I said because I did it to provoke and rile you up. It was a lie though. As someone who always sees you drawing, I can't call your work ugly at all. Your art is... astounding. You make it look like it's so easy to do. I think you forgot next sentence after I told you that."

"What was the sentence after?"

Tsukishima sighed, "I told you to keep doing it, right?"

The sound of (Y/N) crying engulfed the kitchen, "Oh gosh, why did I forget that... I'm sorry, I'm so idiotic..."

The blonde brought her back to his arms, "Will you stop crying, you've been too hard on yourself today,"

(Y/N) hid her face on his chest, muffling her speech, "c-couldn't help it... my mind is such a mess... I do not know..." She paused, coughing. "It's no use if m-my parents don't acknowledge me..."

"Hundreds, or perhaps thousands of people who follow you on social media account recognize you. People in school recognizes you. I recognize you. I am your ally. Isn't that enough reason for you to get back on your feet? I will support you just like how you supported me. You have a lot of people who admire you, but I only have a few people and you. Yet your words are enough. I'm certain that soon, you will reach your parents' standards and get them to acknowledge you. It's not impossible."

(Y/N) fixed her tear-stained face before looking up to him, "You know what? Who are you? Is a good spirit possessing your body? The Kei I know will either stay quiet or laugh at me for being pathetic."

"I was trying to be nice for once and this is what I get?" He frowned.

(Y/N) chuckled and hugged Tsukishima, "I'm sorry. Everything you said meant the world to me. Thank you very much."

She relaxed against his lean body, "I have a question though..."

"What?"

"You literally had no business in my art, it was my own problem. Why are you doing this?"

"Why don't you ask yourself after you argued with me that night? Why did you have to butt in with my choices?"

"Because you like volleyball! You might look like that someone stole your dinosaur collection when you're at practice, but you're good at it and have a future in it! It is a part of you, and you're deciding to throw it away? Your potential is too big to be wasted and I refuse to let that happen." Her voice is a little louder now, but hoarse.

"There's your answer, little gremlin."

"How is that— Oh."

"But I'd like to add something."

"What is it?"

"You look better doing what you really like. It makes you look less like a hag."

It was silent after that. (Y/N) punched his arm. Tsukishima didn't even wince but asked, "What was that for?"

"The last statement was unnecessary, and the first one is sweet yet cringey." She criticized.

"C'mon, I'm just a teenager. Aren't you the cringey one most of the times?"

She used the handkerchief to sniffle her runny nose away, "Why do you have a knack of returning everything I said to me?"

"I won't do it if it's not appropriate." Tsukishima placed his hands on her back and to her hair, "So, what are you going to do now, (Y/N)?"

"I'll think things through. My brain is still slightly messy, but I'll be fine, thanks to you. But Kei..."

He hummed as a response. "I don't want to go home. I want to run away."

"Not possible. You can't survive on your own. You're almost 18 and until now, you don't understand how a washing machine works with all your perfect scores in exams."

"This is just a thought. I didn't say I'll be alone. I'm taking you with me."

"I refuse."

"Why?"

"Couldn't you wait for more months until we graduate?"

(Y/N)'s eyebrows raised, "So basically, you're agreeing, but not this time?"

"No, but you'll be free of your parents' suffocating control. Who knows how huge is your potential by that time."

"How considerate of you." The girl smiled.

"Only this time. And no, we won't live in the same place in college. Not yet. Not until we finish our studies, have secured jobs, and get important things done."

"Will you be playing volleyball at college?"

He lazily replied, "Probably."

"Don't give me such an ambiguous answer!"

"Probably yes."

"Hmm. Fine by me. I'll continue to draw, then." (Y/N) rested her head near Tsukishima's neck.

He smiled a little at her answer, "Another thing though. I don't think... you should leave things with your parents like that. There'll be a time where you have to face it."

"Yes, that sucks... I don't want to think about it but I'll have to go back eventually... When that confrontation happens, I'll try to calmly talk it out with them. I will never be certain if it will end well. But my hate and fear of them won't change."

"You can always run back here if it didn't end well."

"Kei, don't want to see their faces just yet. Can I stay here for a while?"

"You even bother to ask. You are welcome anytime in this household. Just enter the house in the front door, not in my window."

"Right... thank you."

"Oh, now it's my turn to ask. How did you get in there?"

(Y/N) sighed, "It was on 4:30pm. I was on the loose and I looked for a store where anyone can't recognize me so I can eat for lunch. But there's this creep who kept on following me—"

"Did he hurt you?" He abruptly questioned.

"No. I ran as fast as I could before he could even get close to me, but in the next block, there were the town authorities with my mom, and I knew they were looking for me, so I blended into the people with my hoodie on and made my way. I climbed the tree in panic that they'll find me and hid there. It took me hours to notice that your house is just next to it, so I decided to climb to your window. However, the window was locked, and I was stuck."

Tsukishima sighed in relief. "It was a miracle that a klutz like you didn't fell off the tree and surprisingly, no one found you."

"I was high in adrenaline when I climbed the tree. My blending and hiding skills are in ninja-tier now, I beat you."

"Whatever. What did you have for breakfast?"

"...a melon bread."

"Just that?"

"Just that."

Tsukishima kissed her forehead before lifting her up with him. "Go change. Borrow any of my clothes. I'll reheat the food."

(Y/N) kissed his cheek, slowly got off him and went upstairs. Tsukishima opened his phone to text Yamaguchi about her situation and proceeded to reheat the spicy curry.

"Wait, Kei! Is it okay for me to eat?" She shouted from upstairs.

"What kind of question is that? Of course you can." He shouted back.

"Your mom left that for you, for your dad and for your brother. I'd feel bad."

"My brother and dad will come home late and I'm sure they've eaten already. So is mom."

"Are you sure? I can replace the food." She said while going down the stairs.

"Oh, you can cook? I'm afraid you'll burn the whole kitchen." He mocked.

"At least not the whole house." (Y/N) laughed, "Just kidding, I have a tiny knowledge in cooking."

"You don't have to, I told you they already ate. I'll bring out the sushi mom made if you still want to eat."

"Alright. Thank you for the food."

Few hours later, Tsukishima's mom came home and took off her shoes. "I'm home."

As she was about to enter the living room, Akiteru greeted her and placed his finger in front of his lips, indicating her to keep quiet. She wondered what was going on and saw her youngest son and his girlfriend leaning on his shoulder, asleep on the couch in front of the TV. He signaled her to read the note Kei left on the table.

To mom, dad, and brother,

Earlier in the morning, (Y/N) went missing and her parents and town authorities were looking for her. I found her on the way home, but it turns out that she ran away from her home because of an intense argument between her parents, and doesn't want to be found yet. Please let her stay here for a while. I'll do most of the household chores or any favor you ask me in return.

Mom, I shared the curry and sushi rolls with her. I left for some for dad and brother. (Y/N) said it was very delicious.

Love,

Kei.

She smiled after reading the note and looked at the sleeping kids. She took notice of (Y/N)'s eyes and quickly understood the situation. Before she left to rest in her room, she looked for a spare blanket and laid it atop them to keep them warm.

(Y/N) snuggled further to Tsukishima's arms, satisfied on how this night will end well, unlike yesterday's.

250 notes · View notes

asexualdrago · 4 years ago

Text

20 Questions

b@babycakes1983 shoutout to them for the FNAF prompts

Glamrock Freddy laid flat with his back against a wall in a sitting position as Gregory was nestled in his lap.His breathing was slow and his heartbeat was calm. No wrinkle of worry or fear on the boy’s face. He had to admit that Roxanne and Glamrock Chica were right. He was adorable when he slept. How they knew this, no idea. Maybe he had taken naps in their green rooms and he didn’t notice. He didn’t mind it all that much. At least he can admire these peaceful moments after a long day of work. No Glitchtrap, no Vanny and no worries.

Gregory shifted in his lap and rested his head against Glamrock Freddy’s chest where the empty compartment sat. A low, rhythmic ticking echoed in the boy’s ears. He slowly opened his brown eyes and yawned. Glamrock Freddy felt his circuits stop flowing suddenly seeing his boy wake up. “Hello Gregory, sleep well?” He asked in amusement as the boy looked a bit dazed from waking up. Looking up he saw Freddy’s kind, glowing blue eyes.

Nearly blushing he said “I-uh. Yeah I slept well.” He smiled at the animatronic as Glamrock Freddy maneuvered his jaw to smile down at the boy. “Um Freddy, how long was I asleep?” “2 hours and 30 minutes. If you are wondering how you got here, Vanessa told us that your mother dropped you off with her and she brought you here as she had work to do and trusted me to watch you.” Glamrock Freddy explained. Gregory’s blush deepened and laughed awkwardly. “Oh, um sorry about that Freddy.” Said animatronic laughed and ruffled the child’s hair making him giggle and try to push it away. “Hey! C-cut it out! Freddy’s response was to jab his metallic fingers into the boy’s sides and making him squeak adorably. “Stop it!” He continued to squeak. Glamrock Freddy loved it when his boy laughed. It made him feel alive and he was certain it made him feel better too. To laugh and have joy surge in him. Glamrock Freddy noticed he doesn’t laugh as much as most children he would meet on the daily. He guessed he was terribly shy. To be honest, he didn’t react like most kids, he felt that Gregory was lonely. Just meeting him made Gregory feel better and he was still shy but he made more of an effort to socialize with others thanks to the gang’s encouragement.

He continued to jab him as gently as possible as he didn’t want to hurt him. He stopped after a few minutes and ruffled Gregory’s hair again. “Y-you’re mean” He pants. “I am not mean Gregory. Its not in my programming, I am playful and energetic.” “Not energetic enough to catch Roxy when she’s running.” The boy then stuck out his tongue at him. Glamrock Freddy playfully rolled his eyes and picked Gregory up in his arms.

“Hey Freddy, where are the others?” “Working on their performances for the talent show after closing hours.” Gregory looked at him dumbfounded. “You guys have talent shows?” Freddy nodded. “Yes, what do you think we do after hours? Scare the night guards?” ;) “I am pretty sure Vanessa would hate that.” Glamrock Freddy chuckled. “Yes, yes she would.” Glamrock Freddy walked towards the green rooms. Specifically his, passing both the sun and moon animatronic jumping along beams and pipes. “Freddy, w-what are t-they d-doing? Noting his slight stutter he rubbed the boy’s back to calm him. “Its ok. They are not going to harm you. I would take a guess and say they are playing. Better than Moondrop pranking us constantly till 6 am.” He sighed. “Figured the sun animatronic would be asleep right now.” “Asleep? Oh, powered down correct?” Glamrock Freddy nodded. Ruffling his hair again, another thing he noticed. Gregory didn’t react to affection very well and was confused by it. Just when Glamrock Freddy showed him these acts of affection he slowly became more comfortable to his touch and didn’t flinch when he came too close.

“Why don’t we play a game? To pass the time.” He suggested. Partially to get his thoughts at ease. His metal feet clanking against the tiles of the pizzeria museum. Gregory nodded and thought of the 20 question game.”20 questions hmm? I’ve never played it before. I guess we can try. Do we just ask each other questions till we reach 20?” Gregory looked up at him with bright brown eyes. “I guess so. Should I start or you?” His metal jaw maneuvered into a smile and said he’ll start. 1. what’s your favorite color?” “Yellow. 2. What’s your favorite music?” “Hmm. I’d say 80′s rock.” Gregory laughed. “Don’t you guys play 80′s rock? There has to be something else.” Gregory laughed. “To be honest, I am not certain but I do have an assortment of songs. 3. what’s your favorite past time?” “I’d say coloring or drawing. 4. Who’s your favorite Glamrock member?” Freddy shook his head. “I don’t have a favorite , they are all family to me. That also includes you and sadly Vanessa.” He leaned his head down to nuzzle him. Gregory leaned his head towards the nuzzling with a small smile on his face,

Just to think, a few weeks ago he was afraid of him doing that thinking he was going to hurt him. Which brought back the thoughts he had about his family. Gregory felt like his child. In other words, his cub. The others would mention or joke how he and Gregory have gotten closer and Vanessa mentioning that she had a feeling the reason was because he didn’t have a father or the relationship wasn’t as great as it was supposed to. “I been at their house, I didn’t see a picture of the father. Just Gregory and his mother. Makes me wonder though.” It wouldn’t hurt to ask, right? “5. What is your family like?” Gregory’s cheerful smile slowly faded. He looked nervous and didn’t know what to say. “Why do you want to know about that?” He asks. His voice becoming shy and soft. “Well, I have been thinking over it lately. And wondered what families are like, outside the complex.” Gregory looked down and seemed to think it over before sighing. “You already seen my mom. Right?” “I have, and Vanessa told us that she met her and they usually get smoothies together.” “Well, my mom is around but since she works at the diner and she isn’t home a lot. But she tries her best to raise me. Making sure everything is ok and that I am doing well.”

Glamrock Freddy’s metallic ears twitched. “Are you usually alone?” “Sometimes, but she’ll have me stay with the neighbor or have a family member watch me if they have time and if they don’t mind.” Gregory took on a saddened look that Glamrock Freddy didn’t like seeing. As much as he wanted to do something but he let him continue. “She cares a lot about me. She doesn’t want me to be alone but she doesn’t have much of a choice. She’s a good person Freddy. She just has it hard.” “What about your father? What does he do?” “He....he is....not around anymore Freddy. I don’t know my dad....all that well....” Glamrock Freddy titled his head in confusion. “What do you mean? Did he pass away or...?” Gregory shrugged. “Mom doesn’t like talking about it. No less mentioning him. Sometimes I feel like when she does or someone mentions him, she gets visibly upset. So I never ask her. I doubt I want to know when she gets upset.” Gregory looked down and looked as if about to cry. “Is that why you don’t react well to affection? They don’t show much of it?” Gregory shrugged. “I-I don’t know Freddy.” Noting the boy was becoming more upset. He held him close and started consoling him.

“Mom sometimes mentions I look just like him.” He sobs slightly. “Almost like she hates and loves the idea of me looking like him. Sometimes I feel like she hates me for it but doesn’t want to show it.” Glamrock Freddy felt rage surge in him. It wasn’t his cub’s fault that he has some resemblance to his father that he had no knowledge about. “It’s not your fault Gregory. Never was, you hear. You are special. Special to me. Your mother is strong, but even us adults can have our moments of self anger. You may not know him but its not your fault. I am so sorry you had to go through that.” Gregory hugged him and snuggled against his chest. He felt Glamrock Freddy nuzzle him again and stroking his back and hair. Luckily these actions helped him calm down. “I wasn’t joking when I said that you are part of our family. We love you Gregory. I love you my little cub.” Gregory couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Every word coming from his mouth more genuine than the next. He cried out of happiness and said softy. “I love you too. And I hope you don’t mind me seeing you as a father to me.” “I don’t mind my cub. I don’t mind at all.”

#fnaf security breach #gregory #glamrock freddy

76 notes · View notes

lukesperfectharmonyhair · 4 years ago

Text

im rewatching jatp instead of studying for the 3 tests i have tomorrow and i thought i would share my thoughts and reactions with each episode so enjoy!!....

wake up

- hearing the “1, 2, 3″ at the start of the episode gives me more serotonin than my antidepressants ever will

- julie’s slippers...that’s it...that’s the thought

- that dry ass pasta the molina’s are eating for dinner??? someone needs to give my man ray some cooking tips or a cookbook... something

-the looks the boys give julie when she says it was an OLD cd she found. as if they could be old??

-the entire julie and luke kitchen scene i mean there are no words to describe how much i am in love with scene. the banter, the flirting, luke giving this girl he literally just met an actual PIECE OF HIS SOUL so she can get music back into her life. not a single time have i watched that scene and not felt my heart literally grow cause of how cute they are.

-the entire scene when julie is singing wake up. that scene is what made me literally CRAVE watching the other episodes. like of course i was going to watch them cause i wasn’t gonna just stop watching a show after one episode, and yes the show was good already but seeing the lighting and her voice, and just everything about the scene,,,,*chef’s kiss*

bright

-flynn drinking seven sodas....SEVEN??? i would be throwing up if i drank more than like 2 and she drank seven,,,no ma’am.

- flynn and her trumpet. talented queen

- “ i wouldn’t have given you the song if i didnt think you were gonna rock it.” lmaooo im crying:)

- i start tearing up every time julie goes to play the first notes of bright,,, and then i’m full on bawling when the guys come in and play with her cause...they weren’t playing to be seen they were playing to be there for her and play to comfort her. pls i love them<3

- nick vibing in the front row

- the tech guy deserves so much more praise

flying solo

- reggie’s little butt shake or whatever you wanna call it!!

- julie’s little laugh when she yells at the guys to stop it

- “and we’re on the runway again” GENUINELY one of my favorite lines of the whole show pls i love luke’s humor

-this is the first time i noticed this but reggie’s face after alex says “DONT TELL ME HOW TO GHOST!”

-WILLIE!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE YOU<3333333

-the slow mo helmet take off,,,,me too alex me too

-willie’s little giggles:))))

- “oh-oh!”

- “no clue” alex i love you baby<3

- next season better give us a scene of flynn throwing eggs at someone’s house because i think it’s safe to say we were robbed of that experience.

- the flying solo performance is just amazing

i got the music

- just the whole opening scene is so cute ....the dancing, singing, happiness RADIATING from julie

-nick in an all white suit and fedora

-WILLEX MUSEUM DATE YEAH BABYYYYY

- carefree skateboarder bf and anxiety ridden drummer bf

- yelling. in. museums.

-alex thinking he’s literally dying again because of the salt... zero braincells in this band.

- another scene we were robbed of that i need to see in season 2...reggie singing “home is where my horse is” while alex and julie sit patiently and attentively listen to him but luke looks like he’s about to commit murder

- i get SO MUCH second hand embarrassment for julie when she looks through luke’s songbook and says “ wow luke I didn’t know you were such a romantic” julie baby i love you but...eekkkkk

- “he looks like a substitute teacher”- where did he come up with that like so many other things he could be compared to but a substitute teacher??

- “luke introduced you to rock” heck yeah it did.. literal soulmates

- would like to see a picture of the raccoon in Flynn’s backyard

- wee woo wee woo police sirens://///

- julie’s outfit ughhhh i love it

- the poster that im pretty sure says “sexiest role” behind caleb... why was that necessary

the other side of hollywood

- THE ENTIRE PERFORMANCE OF THE OTHER SIDE OF HOLLYWOOD

- i lose my absolute shit over this song omg literal chills

- the cape grab i cannot physically do this rn

- willie being so excited the entire performance and looking over to see alex’s reaction

- reggie being in awe everytime one of the girls performing does something.. me too reggie

-”well i wouldn't really call it mAAgiCcCC bUT”

- nick and his fedora again

- alex has a crush, alex has a crush on.....WILLIE

-the boys eating food for the first time in 25 years is honestly so realistic

-alex shoving a whole slice of pizza in his mouth

- lukes ‘OH MY GODDDDD’

- reggie kissing his meatball sub that looks painfully dry but also delicious

- the continuation of the other side of hollywood performance and everyone dancing

-reggie imitating caleb’s evil laugh and owen trying so hard not to break

-me getting mad at the boys for not showing up for julie and being sad with her but at the same time i’m obviously not mad at the boys just...disappointed?? idk

finally free

- how did julie get to the school if she missed the first three classes?? wasn’t she still at flynn’s house from the night before cause she slept over so did she walk to school or was she just sitting in flynn’s house by herself and one of flynn’s parents was like you gonna go to school or???

-dance class with nicky poo<3

-reggie fixing his amp in the rain

-julie’s blue dress outfit in this episode is my ABSOLUTE favorite

- the birthday candle scene makes me sob like a little baby,,,and rightfully so

- julie smart, smart to be taking calculus as what a sophomore??

- all eyes on me yes queen iconic

- alex dancing is how i dance in my brain whenever the song comes on

- finally free as a song is NEVER given enough credit and why not?? it’s my favorite song they do as a band AND the madison’s vocals and the echoing part omg i loveeeee

- and the whole performance with luke’s heart eyes. i count this performance as the moment luke like fell in love with julie...like full on just blown away with how much awe and admiration he has for her in that moment and all the time.

- julie and luke singing “and you’re a part of me” while staring directly into each others soul,,,yeah that’s love kids

edge of great

- carlos being the ghost hunter he is and tía being done with him

- luke’s pouting face

- reggie and ray making breakfast together is so wholesome. reggie really loves and seeks comfort in ray and i love that

- luke just waiting next to julie’s locker and his little “hey”

- the first time i watch this scene i thought charlie was from new york cause of the way he says “ i can't do this without you” and then i watched the cast interviews and just realized he is somewhat joey tribbiani

- jealous luke hehehehehhehehe

- “well dont you look shARrP”- yes he does luke thank you very much

- “uh oh i think someone has a crush on julie” yeah you do you little shit,,, now admit it to her

- the proud look on luke’s face when he realizes julie is still paying attention to HIM even though she’s supposed to be having a full on conversation with nick

- the shoulder push ( as someone who has had their own shoulder pushed in the middle of a high school hallway as a weird way of flirting,,,,i can definitely somewhat attest to how luke is feeling in that moment and i too continued to flirt with the person who shoulder shoved me while we were still standing in the hallway)

- the flow from whatever the hell dance nick and julie are doing and the perfect harmony dance is so special to me and i love it

-ADOANCLOBNAOVBCOAB THE HAIR PLSSSSS

- EVERYTIME THE SCENE COMES ON AND I SEE HIM WALKING THROUGH THE MIRROR I HAVE TO PAUSE THE SHOW FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES WHILE I DIE LAUGHING BECAUSE THE HAIR IS SO BAD EVEN THOUGH I SHOULD BE USED TO HOW IT LOOKS AFTER WATCHING THIS SHOW LITERALLY 30 TIMES

- i think people see my username and assume i like his hair in this scene but...ummm fun little fact i do not like it

- the dance is so good though ugh my babies

- the hair

- madison is gorgeous

- another season 2 scene i need: julie teaching this dance to luke and they perform it in front of alex and reggie so they can see luke roll on the floor like that

-the hair

- the lift i loveeee

- the voices at the end of the song *chef’s kiss*

- the way julie spins out from luke and into nick omg so good

- “thAnKs pArTnER”

- luke denying his feelings for julie,,,babe pls

- the whole edge of great performance is so good and beautiful and the colors are SPECTACULAR

-julie avoiding luke’s gaze lolz

- can't believe my mans really tried to deny he didn’t have feelings for julie like 5 hours earlier even though he’s getting upset because she hasn’t looked at him in 2 minutes

- THE. GUITAR. RIFF. SOLO.

- when i finally learn how to play the electric guitar well enough to learn the guitar solo... it’s over for everyone

-nick just came to watch the girl he likes perform not watch her flirt with a hologram plssss can we give this man a break next season.

- “we have to say goodbye to julie”- that’s literally more important to luke than not playing music anymore because julie is music to him now

unsaid emily

-already crying and the episode hasn't even started

-willex in the orpheum

- alex literally being OVER reggie

- nope too emotionally unstable to watch this scene right now

- my therapist will be hearing about this tomorrow

- show us the baby picture of luke cowards

- this is such a beautiful song that makes me cry every fucking time gosh damn it

- everytime i watch the flashback scene of luke on his bike i think of “christmas song” by phoebe bridges and i cry even more

- i tried to learn how to play this song on my electric guitar (because i dont have an acoustic guitar) and i ended up crying half way through so i do not think i will be playing it anytime soon:/

- the harmonies *chef’s kiss*

- THE POLICE LIGHTS ....i cry

- FAT tears rolling down my face

- there's literally not a moment i don’t cry during this episode

- interesting little relationship :0

- when i played percussion in 7th grade i used to lay down on the couch in the practice room at school ( which god knows what people did on that couch...ew) and stick my drumsticks up my nose too,,,, just another similarity between alex and i

stand tall

- willie really drove a bus 200 miles into the desert for his crush

- WILLEX HUG

- i love willie no last name so much,,,i just wanna hold and protect him

- alex’s ballerina dance

-julie’s overall outfit i love<3

- “im swimming”

- the way carlos hangs up the iPad on tía makes me CRACK UP he’s just lmao bye girl

- another julie outfit i love

- “anything julie. you know that.” AHHHHHAASIDSJFPACISN love bitches

- the suits

- luke’s hair in this episode is so much better than the perfect harmony hair pls

- YOU GOT NOTHING TO LOSE

- the way luke looks so restricted and confined in his suit... but at the same time he looks like a 10 week old puppy

-luke’s AGGRESSIVE but small foot tapping leading up to being on the stage

- the solos:)))))

- crying again over julie’s monologue to her mom

- julie really was brave enough to be ready to perform by herself

-the way Trevor looks at carrie when she says “been here before”

-ALEXXXXXX

-REGGIEEEEE

-luuukkKKKEEEEEEE

- this performance makes me cry

- especially the first time when i saw luke flickering...sobs

- he finally looks free in his suit:))

- alex’s solo is so pretty i love him

- reggie’s solo too

- nick just straight up vibing the entire performance

- alex and luke holding hands...hehehe cute besties

- “thank you, guys” NO THANK YOU

- the way julie begs for them to do something about the jolts for HER cause she knows luke would never say no to her

- “no music is worth making, julie, if we’re not making it with you,” I JUST SCREAMED AND IM PRETTY SURE I WOKE UP MY ENTIRE HOUSEHOLD...whoops

- going back to that line i could say so much about it but....for someone who’s life was literally MUSIC for the 17 years he was alive, and after finding out he could play music again even though he was dead and saying it made him feel alive, he would give that up- he would give up playing his guitar, playing in a band with his friends, give up writing and singing music- if he wasn’t doing that with julie. that’s more than saying i love you,,,that’s literally like saying i’d give up my ENTIRE LIFE and what i love to do if i dont get to do it with you

- i just made myself cry with that description...wow

-the hug<3

-also imagine how luke felt in that moment,,, hearing this girl, once again that he would give his life up for, saying in his ear that she loves them. i would motherfucking glow too, luke

- *passionately but gently holds each others faces*

-HANDS OFF MY BABY NICK, CALEB

- caleb’s outfit is....something

- the head turn plssss

this was so long and i am so sorry but if you read this far.....leave some of your own reactions or thoughts:)))

k goodnight im gonna, ugh, finally go study ://

#julie and the phantoms #jatp #julie molina #alex mercer #luke patterson #reggie peters #willie #flynn jatp #nick jatp #carrie wilson #renew jatp #netflix PLEASE we are begging give us a season 2

68 notes · View notes

ficsandfandom · 4 years ago

Text

Red, White and Royal Blue Rant (includes some spoilers)

Ok, I know I’m very late but my reading list is massive and I only read fanfiction for literal years so BookTok has bombarded me with books I need to read. Don’t hurt me.

Anyway, I read it yesterday- finished it last night and I was just sobbing on and off throughout the whole thing. I expected a wholesome story, but it hurt??? so much??? I related to it way to much and it just stabbed me in the heart many many many times. my eyes literally hurt from wiping away tears because I also cried at the happy parts because I’m a jealous person and seeing couples in love pains me- which makes being a romance reader very difficult. Anyway, here’s my main points:

1. The casual diversity had me in tears omg! We had queer characters, trans character, poc and they had key roles in the story. There were random people we met that weren’t written as default straight cis white characters and instead were unique in their own way- even if it was a one-line mention. I loved it.

2. When I started reading, I thought it was set way in the future and when someone said 2019 it kind of shocked me. Female President, mixed race First Family etc. just had me assuming the timeline was different. Which is incredibly sad. It is 2021 and this isn’t the norm. America- ‘land of the free’- hasn’t had a single female President. Not saying other countries are amazingly better but America is so often associated with equality and progressiveness when tbh it isn’t that amazing. But this story has given me very high hopes of the world which probably aren’t going to be met for a long time to be frank. So that’s not great.

3. The experiences of the main characters broke me so many times. There aren’t many bisexual main characters that I have come across and I thought both the leads were gay. So, when Alex came out as bi I had to stop reading for a few minutes and process it. The speeches at the end of the book had me in tears- again- because it is such a basic thing that hasn’t happened yet. The fact that they were celebrating that Ellen was the first female President made me so conflicted- because yes!!! you did it!! But in reality, we still haven’t.

4. I adore their relationship so much and their whole coming out experience h u r t so damn much. I’m an ethnic queer from a homophobic family/culture. So when Alex came out and was mainly supported by his family, I was in tears because that most likely will not happen for me. And when his mother said things about image and what others would think- even though she loved him, and he would always be her child- it hit too hard. And I think the worst part was that I didn’t blame her? Because with the risk of losing the election and their status it is the shitty reality that what people think matter.

5. When Henry came out and he was told to pretend and hide and keep up appearances, i was not at all okay. Now im not going to start ranting about homophobia but I will never understand why tf people care about who other people love. like ??? wtf dude? Why are you so fussed?

6. “What are we even defending here, Philip? What kind of legacy? What kind of family, that says, we’ll take the murder, we’ll take the raping and pillaging and the colonizing, we’ll scrub it up nice and neat in a museum, but oh no, you’re a bloody poof? That’s beyond our sense of decorum!”

This is what terrifies me about institutions of power- they excuse so much because it’s part of their 'history' but queer history is erased and ignored and buried and our present isn’t any better. They'll go to campaigns and start charities and shelters, but you can bet that if one of their kids came out as queer it'd be hidden- unless of course, it’s beneficial to their image.

Maybe it’s the fact that I’m a bisexual WOC who’s been a die-hard feminist since like 8, but this book broke me and put me back together again so many times. The fact that it is 2021, and simply reading a STORY about a romance between the bi, mixed race son of the first female President of America and the gay Prince of England make me feel this much feeling is very very sad.

I have no idea why this book is bashed so much and called basic because I genuinely loved it so much. I want everyone to read this, and I need people to stop hating on it because I was on tiktok while I was reading, and I was called a basic white woman who buys pride merch from the store down the road. What does that even mean?? /hj

This is another

MASSIVE RECCOMENDATION to go and read this masterpiece. And… if somehow you are late to the scene and this actually made you read it, tell me what you think after you finish!

#red white and royal blue #queer stuff #bisexual characters #booktok #henry x alex #lgbtq representation #poc in romance #gaypride #bi proud #bisexual af

20 notes · View notes

0ghostwriter0 · 4 years ago

Text

Collaboration with @thecavillstache. Imagine being in love with Henry and Richard. The reader has to see Henry after Richard proposed and they come to terms with their feelings for each other.

I really loved working on this with you. You’re knowledge on Henry cavil and my knowledge on Richard Madden made this so fun to write.

Pairings: Henry Cavill x reader x Richard Madden

Warnings: emotions, swearing

A week ago, you experienced the happiest and the hardest day of your life.

The transition from spring to summer was your favourite. The metropolitan museum was your favourite place. Standing in front of the flowing staircase, Richard grasped your delicate hands. Slowly, he dragged a small velvety box from his pocket. After 2 years of dating, from secret glances across the table and trips back to his parents’, today was the day. But deep down, you felt an anchor pulling you down. Even though you've been dating for 2 years, Richard had never wanted to make it exclusive so you never corrected the press when you were seen out with a certain costar. Henry. Although, when you opened up the trap that caged your soft voice, there was no denying how much you wanted to be Mrs Madden.

“Y/N, we’ve been around the town for a while and it’s been one hell of a ride...”He paused.

You were dragged back to reality when bulbs flashed in your face. This wasn’t a dream. Hundreds of photographers turned their attention away from the numerous celebrities in handcrafted gowns. This was the Met Gala after all. Your Alexander McQueen dress flowed through your fingertips as you held on to the one constant. Richard smirked and slowly knelt onto the red carpet.

“I’m so in love with you. I know it’s taken me a while to accept it but I was scared that you wouldn’t feel the same” his smooth voice trickled up from his heart to grace your ears.

“Rich-” he cut you off.

“From the moment we met I couldn’t stop thinking about how I would propose to you. So when you said that you loved it in movies when it was a huge romantic gesture at their favourite place, I knew today would be the day,” the Scottish actor slowly opened the box to reveal a Haribo ring. “ that I’d ask you to be mine. It’s not much but I wanted to promise tha-” you cut him off. Flinging your arms around his neck, you sunk to the ground.

“Yes.”

.•° ✿ °•.

Sitting uncomfortably on his sofa with his best companion, Henry’s heart dropped as your engagement had just been shown live on almost every channel. In his mind, he was happy for you but in his heart, he was truely broken. Only a month ago, Henry and you had spent many moments of intimacy together and shared feelings that he’d never fully felt before.

A month ago, on the last day of filming, Henry had over reacted when you told him that Richard was coming to pick you up and take you out. Since, he’d called every Wednesday to catch up but was still very distant. After the third call, he stopped. Finding it hard to continue watching the tears of bliss that fell from your face on the screen in front of him, Henry jumped up from his seat and went to locate a lead. Catching on to his owner’s movements, Kal’s tail went crazy almost knocking a now cold tea off the coffee table. Slowly, after attaching Kal’s lead, Henry moved to turn off the television but not before the camera zoomed into the Haribo ring.

“Asshole can’t even get her a fucking ring,” he snapped and he pressed the off button on the remote. “She deserves better, fuck she deserves a ring.”

.•° ✿ °•.

In the weeks that followed, yourself and Richard spent hours in interviews promoting Bodyguard season 3 and answering questions about your relationship. All the while, you knew deep down that you’d soon be back on set with Henry to finish filming Girl From U.N.C.L.E. The morning before your return to set you got a call from Guy Riche telling you to “avoid Henry he’s been in a foul mood for the past two weeks. Better not talk to him or he’ll snap at you like he has everyone else.” You knew it was your fault.

Since the proposal, you hadn’t spoken to each other but then again you weren’t speaking before. That night was restless- impossible to sleep. Yet there you were. Standing in front of the stage door, you were shaking. What if he hated you? How would you do the sex scene if he hated you? Would Guy get pissed at you because you couldn't shoot the scene?

"Y/N!” a voice bellowed behind you.

It was Henry. His thick British accent was music to your ears and yet you felt so guilt hearing him shout your name. Turning around slowly, you closed your eyes not wanting to see the hurt, pissed off, kind, beautiful, betrayed face of the Cavill. Much to your surprise, you were soon engulfed in a bear-like hug. Maybe he was okay.

"I missed you on set” he started but you just trembled under his grip as small tears started to collect in your eyes.

As Guy Ritchie appeared over your shoulder, Henry pulled away and headed on to set. Swiftly wiping away your tears, you headed to hair and makeup. An hour later you were in your cabaret attire ready to film a huge scene for the film. Scantily dressed, you found your way to the dressed-up 1960s French dance exotic club. Soon, Guy yelled action and the scene was in full swing. After 12 takes and 4 camera changes, the scene was over. Hurring back to your trailer, you prayed that no one would find you. After parading your body around the set for the scene, you began to feel worthless.

It didn’t take long for Henry to notice that you weren’t amongst the writers and actors talking about the success and talent in the scene. Against his better judgement, the god of a man decided now was the time to talk about the engagement. Knocking lightly with his huge gentle hands, Henry felt relief as he heard the delicate movements of your feet as you came to open the door.

“Hen-ry” you exhaled shakily.

“I need to talk” he stated as he came off harsher than he intended.

You nodded quickly and stood aside for him to enter.

“Why did you say yes.” He blurted out as the trailer door closed behind him.

“That’s your question? You ignore me for weeks then hug me out of the blue to ask me why I said yes” your voice was flooded with emotion. “Because he asked. He wanted me, Henry. He loves me” the bank of tears you had refused to let go earlier were now falling violently from your face.

Henry stepped to keep you up against the wall as he wiped away your tears.

“Richard told me how he feels; he’s not like you.” You continued quietly.

“What do you mean by ‘he’s not like you’? What the hell does that mean” Henry crooked his brow but remained inches from your body.

“You are constantly blowing hot and cold with me Henry and it hurts. I needed you but” your voice broke into a squeak.

Henry’s heart sank but he knew the young beauty trembling in front of him was the woman he wanted for the rest of his life. Trying to compose yourself, you looked up into the blue orbs. You noticed the small hint of brown that you had discovered during a moment of intimacy. Quickly, you snapped out of the cyan trap.

“You don’t have to say anything.” Henry started “I won't make you chose because I know that I - I love you”

“No no, you can't do that to me. Tell me you love me and say that I don't have to chose because you know that I can't have you both” you sobbed.

“What do you want from me... Because I need you Y/N. When it's cold and wet outside, I imagine having you in my arms- holding you close to my chest. Then I could breathe in the soft ember scent of your hair.” his gaze was captivating as he said every word you needed to know.

“Show me!” you blurted.

Smirking sinisterly, Henry wrapped his arms around your waist as his lips connected with yours. Could you have both?

Taglist: @thecavillstache @liajiah @esmmyy

Please like, comment, reblog

#henry cavill #preferences #richard madden #imagines #bodyguard #david budd #henry cavill fanfic #henry cavill imagine #richard x ofc x henry #henry cavill x reader #henry cavill fanfiction #richard madden x y/n #richard madden x oc #richard madden x reader #henry cavill x you #reader #superman #captain syverson #met gala

153 notes · View notes

jtrokujo · 4 years ago

Text

𝕵𝖚𝖘𝖙 𝕿𝖍𝖊 𝕿𝖜𝖔 𝕺𝖋 𝖀𝖘

✩｡: * • .───── ❁ ❁ ─────. • * :｡ ✩

❝𝐓𝐒𝐔𝐊𝐈𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐌𝐀 𝐊𝐄𝐈❞

word count: 1.6k

3RD PERSON POV

Like every morning, the big line of glasses is waiting for his girlfriend, but the two youngsters have no plans to go to school because it's the weekend, no, they enjoy their togetherness for all times.

Even if the two have known each other for a long time, that doesn't mean they've been together that long.

For the two of them, it was unimaginable to be in a relationship with the other, but things always happen and change.

Anyone who has asked the respective person about this relationship has long since forgotten because they apparently did not / do not care.

Back to the present.

Tsukishima looked annoyed at the clock on his cell phone and sighed in annoyance, he can't be delayed, even if it's 3 minutes.

It is not rare or common for his girlfriend to be late.

He actually prefers to pick her up instead of waiting for her, not only so that she can hurry up, but also so that she can meet her boyfriend carefree without any bad ulterior motives or any nuisance.

Well that's one of the reasons he hates being late, but he didn't tell his girlfriend about that fact himself.

Because of this particular incident with his brother, he has a strong weakness to trust someone or to trust someone, there are moments when he trusts his girlfriend, sometimes not, it mainly just depends.

But as a good friend, she shows understanding for him, she is too fond of him.

She knows his problems, his fears and the insecurities that almost eat him up, but she still knows the good side that she doesn't see every day, but better than never.

Like, for example, his love for her, his interests in the dinosaurs or his good tutoring when the two do their homework together.

Trapped in thought, someone took him out of it, or rather, something.

The boy's cell phone rang loudly, his heart pounding and he answered the call "Tsuki, where are you?" his girlfriend asked in amazement and tried to ignore the anger.

"In front of our favorite bakery, the question is more where are you, (Y / N) I've been waiting for more than 10 minutes and the weather is not very pleasant at the moment."

"Tsuki, we had agreed that we would meet in front of the museum, that you were present for our last conversation, I knew, but if you went straight into your own world, you have been really so bad in the last few days."

"(Y / N)?" Tsukishima said in a normal tone, "Yes?" she said, however, surprised that he speaks so calmly.

"Didn't we agree that if we'd only go to the museum right after we ate a piece of cake and went for a walk, because it only opens at 2 p.m. and now it's only 10:27 a.m."

"I'll be there in 5 minutes." was the only thing his girlfriend could say hung up as quickly as possible.

Yes, this behavior of his girlfriend wasn't seen every day, but he gets along reasonably well with it.

Of course there are moments or even days when he can lose his last nerve and there have been moments when he insults his girlfriend even though it is not his intention.

Fortunately, however, she knows him too well that she sometimes understands him, but only sometimes.

The one time she showed no understanding was when he was training again with his team and since Hinata was again better than usual, it annoyed him so much that he took all his anger and frustration out on his girlfriend, which caused her ignored him for almost a week.

Back to the present, holding hands, the couple are on their way to coffee.

The fingers are folded together, the wind blows stronger and stronger every second, but if you think that such weather could ruin their mood, you are one-sidedly wrong.

Once there, the two ordered a hot cocoa and a small cake, (Y / N) should already choose a place while Tsukishima delivers the delicacies with a tray.

They talked about their interests and what movie to watch tonight.

While walking around town, Tsukishima looked at his wristwatch that his girlfriend gave him and said, "The museum will open in about 20 minutes."

The friends who make (Y / N) s face shine cannot be overlooked.

Of course, she doesn't really like the museum because she's not really interested, but she knows too well that he likes the dinosaurs that she talked him into going on a date at the museum without any problems.

But he wanted the two to spend more time together, that is to say;

The coffee, the walk and the night at his house had been all his idea.

In the museum, the friend looked at a dinosaur, or rather a Gallimimus.

"What is it, Tsuki?" she asked him and shows it on the Gallimimus. "

From A to Z, her friend explained every information he knows about the Gallimimus.

"They were also a kind of group like wolves, but from the dinosaur genus of the Ornithomimosauria during the Theropoda. They lived for the most part in East Asia. Furthermore, as you can see, they were not small, they were 4 and 6 meters high and weighed up to to an example of 200 kg. "

"You seem to know your way around this, don't you?"

"Because I can." he said roughly, but grabbed his girlfriend's hand and said like a little boy, "Come on, you have to see the others first." and pulled her right after you with you.

TIME SKIP / 3RD PERSON POV

Back at home, the couple meets Tsukishima's brother.

He sighed annoyed and skilfully ignored him, but greeted him out of sheer politeness.

They have known each other for a long time, which is why they have an appropriate relationship.

In other words, a friendship.

You talk now and then.

However, their friendship does not belong in the level where you occasionally write to each other, make phone calls or go to town together.

But that's probably a good thing before Tsukishima gets the last nerve.

Tsukishima is not the kind of friend you ask if you can go out with this person or if he is having trouble going out with this person, knowing other people's passwords or reading through chats.

They know each other too well and also trust what is important in a relationship and therefore find this behavior strange from other couples, because, as I said, trust is part of a relationship.

When he got to his room, Tsukishima took his pajamas and said to his girlfriend "I'm going to get changed in the bathroom, okay?"

She nodded and answered him and also took her pajamas out of her pocket and changed a little faster than usual.

Finished dressed, she stuffed the clothes she was still wearing into her pocket and then put it down.

"Are you ready?" it came out the door.

"Yes I am, can come in."

The door opened and you not only saw Tsukishima in his pajamas, but he also held a small tray with (Y / N) 's favorite sweets.

But not only that, but also a small box.

The friend quickly got up to help her friend "Let me help you." and wanted to grab the tray right away, but Tsukishima pointed to his clothes, which is between his forearm and waist.

"Do you already know which film to watch and how." Tsukishima asked his girlfriend.

"No, I thought you would decide because I was 'allowed' to do it last time." she said and put his clothes where they belong.

"I would prefer if my dwarf would choose a movie." replied Tsukishima and set the tray down on his bed.

"Aww, since when was such a tsuki?" provoked (Y / N) Tsukishima and came a few steps towards him, while at the same time she looked at him gourmet.

Annoyed, he sobbed with his tongue - held a hand on her face and gently pushed her away from him.

He then gave his remote control to his girlfriend and finally said, "Come sit down and choose a movie."

And thus also knocked on the bed.

About half an hour has passed.

While (Y / N) stares obsessively at the screen and slowly eats the candy, Tsukishima secretly observed his girlfriend and the small box.

Breathing deeply, he said her name, while she turned and looked at him, "Is something?" she asked worriedly.

"No, it works. You remember when we were in town about a week ago, there was this shop. It had this chain that impressed you, so I made up my mind yesterday ..." without finishing his sentence he made it to his girlfriend.

She opened the box nervously.

The necklace that (Y / N) wanted, she got from her boyfriend as a present.

She just stared at it with no comments like, 'I want this.' 'Can you get it for me?' or something else, maybe he knows (Y / N) just too well.

He took the chain and asked "May I?"

"(Y / N) turned so he could tie the necklace together," What for, Tsuki? Have you ever seen the price? "She asked him and from now on ignored the film being played.

"When I saw the price, I wasn't too thrilled, but I just had to remember you being pretty amazed as a dwarf, so it wasn't too bad to spend my money."

The tray put away, the television switched off and the blanket over the couple's bodies, they slept cuddled up.

The two of them will not get rid of this event so quickly.

39 notes · View notes