#who is so very much like stan in so many ways

[myimaginationplain]

bill x ford x stan love triangle real....

[jubileebloom]

I aspire to be a lover not a hater. but

[dreamedfyre-a]

ohh if ali.cent ever took hel.aena to visit oldtown she would be vibrating with excitement at the chance to visit the citadel. if they let her enter the library she would read every single book on every single insect there may be. and maybe there wouldn't be many but i figure if there's Facts about insects it'd be on the greatest repository of knowledge in the known world. and she'd devour all of it and forget there is an existence outside of reading those books

[hecatesbroom]

Apparently, today's brainrot of choice is a Golden Girls Sound of Music AU where Rose is Maria, Dorothy's the Captain, and Blanche is the Baroness, only that one scene where the Baroness visits Maria in her bedroom ends very differently & they end up in a polycule

[sincerlyus]

Reverse Falls!!

Soo this is my take on Reverse Falls!! I don't really know which are the original designs or which are the new personalities that each character adapts, so I made my own headcanons!! :3

It should be noted that there are characters who do not change personalities with anyone, but rather their personalities are more exaggerated or are opposite to the originals. Or (in the case of McGucket) their relationships are different so they change their way of being progressively.

EXPLANATION TIME:

This is quite long, I'm going to explain the personalities of each one and how they relate to various characters. Credits to: hours of daydreaming and Google Translate  (TW: child abuse, emotional and physical abuse, homophobia, classism. I don't know if there's anything else, just in case)

Pacifica Northwest: Outgoing and very expressive. She didn't know Gideon very well until her parents sent her to Reverse Falls. She likes to knit, draw, and has a lot of stuffed animals. She has a lot of hair, and likes to do different hairstyles every day ("to be innovative"), cries when she has to cut it. She is very affectionate with Gideon and tries to get him out of his shell. She is a little insecure, but likes to see the positive side of things. She gets along very well with Bud, although sometimes she feels he is a little weird. Symbol: Llama (on her sweater)

Gideon Gleefull: Insecure, has little self-confidence, very skittish and anxious. Has a habit of chewing when he is thinking, like OG!Dipper (chewing on pens, his shirt, etc.). He didn't really know how to talk to Paz at first since the first time they met they were very little, what was she going to say?, was a "Hello" enough?, a handshake?, a complicated handshake?, was she going to ignore him? Paz simply gave him a big hug when she got off the bus (+ gave him a sweater she made on the way). Symbol: Telepathy star (in his hat)

Bud Gleefull: Ultimate scammer. Very friendly and funny, although sometimes a little intimidating. Bye Hawaiian shirts. Very patient with Gideon. He is basically the “cool uncle/dad”. He put Paz to work the day she arrived, although he became attached very quickly and gave her family privileges (he does the same with Gideon).

Mason “Dipper” Pines: He is still very insecure but is able to feign confidence when standing on stage with his sister. He still has a lot of passion for science, he is not very affectionate, he holds back his emotions as he does not want to look vulnerable, especially in front of Stanford. He has a lot of respect for Ford (or rather, fear), being his apprentice he sees him more as a teacher, a superior figure than as an uncle; however he has very little respect for Stan, threatening him and making fun of him. He does not usually use his amulet much, only to practice tricks or in his shows. He has a very distant relationship with his sister, similar to that of the Stan twins. They have many disagreements, but they still have each other's back, especially when Ford is aggressive with one of them. The most sincere relationship he has is with F, although he still treats him like an employee, knowing that he was one of the brilliant minds behind the portal he respects him. Sometimes he discusses theories and shares discoveries with him (although he is embarrassed to think that his only "friend" is an employee of his uncle). Once he met Gideon and Paz, he was able to show his more fragile side and be himself, although he doesn't consider them completely friends (that changes post-weirdmageddon). Symbol: Pine tree (a small pin)

Mabel Pines: A spoiled brat, basically. She's very charming and friendly on stage and with guests at the Pines' many parties, but she's very whiny and selfish behind the scenes. She's not at all affectionate, to the point that she hates physical contact, especially if it's from townspeople. She resents her brother a lot for being Ford's "favorite" (he doesn't really have favorites, he's just less strict with Dipper because he's useful to him). She's Stan's spoiled child, giving her what she wants when she wants it (they have a nice relationship actually, Stan being one of the only ones who comforts her when she's sad). Instead of knitting, she likes to design her own dresses and accessories for shows and parties (her guilty pleasure is arts & crafts, since it's a very "childish" activity for a Pines). Obsessed with Paz, but learns to respect her limits throughout the story. Symbol: Shooting Star (a small pin)

Stanley Pines: He basically swaps personalities with Bud, runs the Telepathy Tent, is very friendly, and is scared of his brother and the twins. He never gets involved in Ford's experiments, having a very tense relationship with him. He loves the twins very much but knowing the power they have with those amulets he prefers to go along with them and not question too much what they ask (he knows when to be firm but the one who really has an impact on them and can make them see reason is Ford). Symbol: Oyster(?? (on a necklace)

Stanford F. Pines: Did you think OG! Ford was a jerk? Well now he's twice as much! He doesn't have an ounce of empathy in him, he's very narcissistic and only cares about his projects and his image. He doesn't care at all about the twins, only seeing them as a way to make money, demanding the most out of them, and he doesn't hesitate to use violence if any of them get out of line. He's very distant with Stanley, speaking to him very dryly (or rather, barely speaking to him at all). He's almost a hermit, living in his laboratory, not letting the townspeople get to know him; although unlike OG! Ford, he cares a lot about how he presents himself in front of the public, taking care of his image and clothing. He's very demanding with Mabel, as he feels she's nothing more than a spoiled child, the image of the Telepathy Tent along with her brother. He is a bit kinder to Dipper, as he realizes that he has a brilliant mind for his age (though not more so than his own), so he includes him in many of his experiments and research if he proves useful; but excluding that, he is just as insensitive as he is with his twin, mistreating him if he does not comply with what is due. His relationship with McGucket is kinda weird: although they were friends in college, the power that Bill/Will offered him completely consumed him, being abusive to F, forcing him to work long nights, keeping him awake by force. He only sees him for his use: his great skill with mechanics (which Ford does not have, although he hates to mention it). Although he was in love with F while he was at Backupsmore, he currently has no romantic feelings towards him, considering him an employee, his assistant, nothing more. He has internalized homophobia (a gift from Filbrick) and classism, so he hates to remember when his relationship with F was one of equals, friends. It disgusts him to think about when he would get so emotional around him. Symbol: Six Fingered Hand (the diaries)

Fiddleford H. McGucket: He is still the brilliant mind he was in his youth, but stress eats him alive. He started to age very quickly thanks to it. He invented the memory gun to try to forget all the horrible things he witnessed or that Ford made him suffer, but his boss doesn't allow him to use it too much since it can damage his mental health and erase knowledge, making him less efficient and useful. He doesn't have a very deep relationship with Stanley, since he practically lives in the lab where Ford forces him to work, but they are able to talk whenever F has a break (almost never). He can't stand the twins too much, not only because he feels that they are very annoying, but because the simple presence of children in his day to day life reminds him a lot of Tate, with whom he no longer has contact. Everyone knows about the abusive relationship he has with Stanford, they are not indifferent to it but they try not to mention it or get involved in his affairs (practically out of fear of Ford).  Throughout his stay with Stanford he started developing an emotional dependence on him: not only did he make him feel that he was useless without him, but he uses violence on him when he is not fulfilling his duty, causing F to blame himself when this happens (What did he do wrong? What can he do to improve?). This got to the point where he started to hurt himself when he did not do something right. Ex: hitting himself when he noticed that his leg was bouncing in front of his anxiety (something that bothers Ford a lot), pulling out clumps of hair in front of the stress of not being able to achieve something, biting his nails, scratching himself, hitting his head (imagine Dobby from HP). Such actions and the mixed feelings he had towards Ford, made him develop masochism, enjoying when he inflicts pain on himself and when he is the victim of Ford's physical and psychological abuse, he clearly hid this for a while since it would look very unprofessional on his part.  Eventually his boss found out and used this to his advantage, being quite sadist himself (he enjoys watching or inflicting pain and/or humiliation on others, in this case, he gets sexual pleasure). So every time Ford needs to let off some steam, vent his frustrations (or is just horny), he uses Fiddleford to fulfill his fantasies, making F's wishes come true as well. He basically uses him as a sex toy, and F doesn't complain, having suffered so much emotional manipulation, he even considers himself lucky that his boss wants to be with him like this, even if it's NOT healthy. Symbol: Spectacles

Bill Cipher: I don't like the idea of ​​changing his name, so Bill stays. He's still the same chaotic demon as in the original series, but this time he's been tricked by Ford into working for him and doing his bidding. He's also forced to do the twins' bidding. We already know that Bill can change his shape and color, so I think all of his shame and self-pity manifests itself in his appearance, turning blue over time (any strong emotion makes him change his appearance). He manipulates Gideon and Paz, making them feel sorry for him so they'll do his bidding (it doesn't work, clearly). The people he has the most contact with are Ford and Fiddleford, as they spend most of their time in the basement where he's locked up.

So that's it. I don't really know how this timeline would work, considering the portal and the journals, but I just wanted to have fun with the character designs and relationships (I feel like the weirdmageddon would happen sooner than in the original timeline). If you want me to go deeper into certain relationships or characters, let me know!!(≧▽≦) I'll see if I can go deeper into the relationship between Ford and Fiddleford that you guys liked so much (you guys really like toxic yaoi, huh??). I'm thinking of making a fanfic or smt to explain their day to day life in the lab and how Ford invited F to work with him (SPOILER: it didn't go well...).

That's it ig, LIKE AND SUSCRIBE!!!1!!1!Σ(°ロ°)

[fuqnia]

SP Main Four + butters !College AU Relationship Headcanons

[☆] A/N | hii guys! i recently hit 500 likes on tumblr and i'm like so speechless... i never wouldve thought people would be interested in reading my stupid little writing hehe, so tysm! my long fic, most wanted, is coming to a close soon, and I have been working on another longfic that's a fem!reader insert x main 4 boys in college! i'm also probably going to write a more realistic/sadder headcanons, because this one was toothachingly sweet </3

[☆] C/W | NSFW under the cut, this is also for f!reader, but i'm open to writing a gn!reader or m!reader in the future

[☆] check out my !college au headcanons for the boys + butters here!

☆ stan marsh

hopeless romantic

will definitely do the most cheesy things for you

has a mixtape of songs that remind him of you

writes love letters, but never gives them to you

feels everything deeply, he's a big ol' baby

late night talks about his fears and dreams

craves emotional intimacy and trust w/ you

super duper attentive to your needs

will put you over himself

overthinks

enjoys laid-back dates! like movie dates, thrifting, strolls

gets jealous reallyyy easily

wont outright admit it tho

very insecure, if someone flirts with u, he'll just sulk LOL

avoids confrontations at all costs

not afraid to cry in front of you

vomits on you if you do something really provocative to him

always offer his jacket/hoodie to you

loves holding your hand

laces his fingers thru yours and swings your hands

goofy ah grin when you surprise him with kisses

big on cuddling

gets super flustered when his friends teases him about you

obsessed with your laugh

keeps a picture of you in his wallet

NSFW

sooo nervous during your first time with him

very eager to please!

takes his time learning what you like

kisses every inch of your body

starts with your lips and works his way down

definitely a soft dom

"does this feel good?" "tell me if you want me to stop"

loves holding your hand while in you

eats your p out like your his last meal

i think he would be more into receiving than giving, but doesn't mind giving at all!

gets shy when you compliment him and tell him how good he is making you feel

prefers gentle sex, unless you want it rough

his entire body flushes red when you tease his cock

like palming thru his shorts, or pressing quick kisses to his tip

loves to cum in your mouth

goes crazy if he gets to paint your face tho

i'm sorry but this man is into creampies...

gets turned on when you're really emotional/crying from him pleasuring you

favorite position is definitely cowgirl

definitely an ass man, loves squishing/pinching your skin

kisses your forehead, cheeks and lips after going down on you

i think he would also be kinda quiet, wouldn't let out that many moans

☆ kyle broflovski

shows his love thru actions rather than words

remembers every anniversary, even the little ones :)

makes detailed itineraries for dates

even though he's a yapper, he definitely enjoys listening to you

fiercely loyal

takes no disrespect towards you

ready to work anyone's shit as so much as they look at you funny

probably would like someone who would challenge him intellectually

needs you to have the same core values as him

DO NOT DO PDA WITH THIS MAN

he will just look at you with pure disgust if you even attempt to...

but will secretly hold hands under the table or sneak a kiss when no one is looking

puts too much pressure on himself to be perfect for you

always notices this little things about you

oh you changed your nail color? you applied your makeup differently?

will blush like crazy when you compliment him

awkwardly rubs the back of his neck

will get irrationally jealous

tries to hide it by cracking sarcastic jokes

writes you long thoughtful texts when your apart, updates you about his day, asks you how yours went

becomes super attentive when your sad or stressed

wraps you in a blanket, makes you tea

i feel like he'd hate the feeling of having a crush

but once he's in a relationship, lowkey a romantic, buy you books he'd think you'd like, jewelry that compliments your skin tone

NSFW

overthinks everything at first

constantly asks "is this okay? are you sure?"

like i said, super attentive, he needs to make sure you're okay

loves eye contact while fucking you

gets really shy when you take control but secretly loves it

prefers slow deliberate strokes and touches

has a thing for neck kisses– both giving and receiving

talks your through it

"you're perfect" "you feel so good"

gets competitive if you tease him about lasting longer

please kiss his freckles... he'll go absolutely feral

not afraid to leave hickeys, scratches or nail prints on you

wrap your legs around his waist, your arms around his neck and his life is yours LOL

i think missionary would be his favorite position

needs to see your face

it's his life mission to make you squirt...

loves fingering you

sit on his face ?

super embarrassed about his moans, but lets it out anyways lmfao

loves your titties, no matter the size

will beg you to let him cum in you

☆ kenny mccormick

we all know kenny is a natural flirt

will wink, smirk, and use cheesy pick-up lines to make you blush

loves physical affection

always has an arm around your waist

makes you laugh constantly

goes to extreme lengths to see you smile, whether it's his silly pranks or grand gestures

draws little hearts and doodles on your notebooks/texts

if he's super bored, he'll draw on your skin lmfao

super duper protective— he'll walk you home late at night and make sure you're always safe

loves taking you on adventurous dates, especially sneaking into places you're not supposed to be

calls you "babe," "sweetheart," or "princess" with that drawl of his hehe

not above embarrassing himself, will write cringe worthy poems or songs and serenade you

immediately notices when you're a little bit off

pulls you into a hug, rubbing your back

buys you little trinkets and steals snacks from eric, saying, "i saw this and thought of you!"

obsessed with kissing you, he'll lean in for a quick peck and smirks when he notices your smile

immediately goes back in for a longer kiss

i think he's super good at braiding hair, and loves playing with yours!

please wear his band tees <3

NSFW

super duper confident, definitely knows what he's doing

loves teasing you, using soft kisses and touches to drive you crazy before giving in

worships your body, tracing every curve with his lips and hands

like kyle, adores it when you take charge and being at your mercy

whispers dirty things in your ear, his voice low and sultry

"you're so fuckin' beautiful babe, I can't get enough of you."

VOCAL AS FUCK ! he'll groan, sigh, whisper your name, letting you know exactly how good you're making him feel

has a downright pornographic moan....

obviously a boob guy, he'll suck and manhandle your tits like there's no tomorrow

will cop a feel secretly infront of others as well LOL

also a thigh and neck guy—he'll kiss, nip, and mark you like he's marking a claim on you

definitely cums alot.... i'm sorry lmfao

dirty as fuck as well... spits in your mouth, puts his fingers in your mouth, making you suck him

taps his tip against your tongue, smearing his precum all over your lips

a big fan of sloppy toppy, grabbing your hair and face fucking you

he's tew good with his tongue... and so so messy when eating you out

will not hold back with his noises, literally slurping ???

loves loves loves overstimulation

favorite position is mating press, loves looking at where you guys connect

cusses when he cums

will crack some corny joke afterward to make you laugh,

"so... we're pretty good at this, huh?" and giggles like a schoolgirl

loves cuddling afterwards!

☆ eric cartman

definitely does grand gestures

brags to everyone about being in a relationship

"yeah, she's lucky to have me."

nobody believes that...

hates PDA in theory, but secretly loves it when you grab his hand or kiss his cheek

he'll complain, but his blushing face gives him away

sends you the most random memes and videos throughout the day as his way of saying he's thinking abt you <3

gets ridiculously competitive when it comes to impressing you

if someone else buys you flowers, he'll show up with a bouquet and stuffed animal, screaming profanities at the other person

jealousss to the max

glares daggers at everyone he perceives a threat, coming up with some sick and twisted plan is his head to take 'em down

gets super pouty when you tease him, but loves the banter between the two of you "i'm not fat, i'm big-boned and you know it!"

will absolutely demand you come over to "study", but in reality he just wants to spend time with you hehehe

has a soft spot when you baby him a little

like brushing his hair or adjusting his hoodie, he'll pretend to hate it but he's melting inside

if you're upset, he'll try to cheer you up in his own weird way...

usually a mix of crude jokes and awkward affection ??

please don't cry infront of him, he'll just panic

keeps a picture of you on his phone as his lock screen, and gets super defensive if anyone points it out

"shut up kahl! it's not even a big deal!"

gaslights the hell out of you, but eventually gives in when he realizes you'll just gaslight him back

will bring you up in any and every conversation, and doesn't care if it annoys the fuck out of his friends

proudly shows off your achievements and loudly declare that you're the bestest girlfriend in the world !

until you piss him off...

NSFW

talks a big game about being dominant and kinky

but he's secretly all about soft and sensual moments with you <3

loves loves loves being in control, rarely lets you take the lead

he needs to boost his ego somehow!

will grab your jaw to force you to look at him, his nails pressing hard into your cheeks

"awe, my poor baby is being fucked too dumb, can't even speak properly"

i'm sorry, but this man never shuts up in bed

whether it's dirty talk or low/breathy moans, he's always yapping

really mean too ):

depending on his mood, he'll either take you to pound town, or just veryy lazy sex

gets flustered if you tell him how good he's making you feel, and fails majorly covering it up

"well, duh. i'm amazing."

loves leaving hickeys—he'll mark you in places just barely hidden, so you're always reminded your his.

obsessed with the fat of your ass and tits, doesn't matter the size—he's all about kisses and touches

will 100% lose focus if you whisper in his ear

his cocky demeanor crumbles instantly, and he's completely at your mercy

gets embarrassed easily if you get too emotional, crying and pawing at his chest that you feel too good

this man does not own a single condom... he'll just pull out and paint your stomach

edges you when he's in a particularly bad mood, and only gives in when you're begging

definitely prefers receiving over giving, but likes the feeling of your walls clamping down on his fingers

asks you to stick out your tongue so he can see the load he blew LMFAOO WHY DID I WRITE THIS

i can't decide if he'd prefer doggy style or cowgirl, so ig just depends on his mood?

has a secret stash of candles or mood lighting for when things get "serious"

will deny deny deny it if anyone ever finds out.

his aftercare is surprisingly sweet— he'll tuck you in, grab snacks, and make sure you're comfortable before he starts pretending he doesn't care <3

☆ butters stotch

is THE definition of doting boyfriend

he'll write you sweet notes and hide them in your bag for you to find later

always asks for your opinion on everything

from what outfit he should wear to what movie the two of you should watch

he just wants to make you happy 😭

blushes like crazy when you compliment him, his hands fidgeting nervously as he stammers out a thank you

will call you every nickname under the sun

"sweet pie," "honeybunch," "cutie patootie"

he's so genuine it's impossible not to grab his cheeks and smile

loves holding hands—it makes him feel safe and connected to you

like stan, he'll swing your arms as you walk, grinning ear to ear

will apologize profusely for the tiniest things, even if it's not his fault

"oh, gosh, i’m sorry! did I step on your toe?"

keeps a running list of all your favorite things so he can surprise you with thoughtful gifts or dates!

if you're upset, he'll bake you cookies or cupcakes and sit with you until you feel better

"it's okay to cry, you know. i'm here."

absolutely adores cuddling, but gets super shy at first

once he's comfortable, he's wrapping you in the coziest of hugs

brings you flowers he picked from the campus quad, tied with a little ribbon

"i hope you like ‘em! i thought they were real purdy."

gets starry-eyed whenever you talk about your dreams or passions

he's your biggest cheerleader and believes you can do anything!

definitely giggles as you try to kiss all over his face

allows you to paint his nails, so you both can match

kisses your scratches/bruises whenever you get hurt, then patches you up himself

takes candid photos of you, so he'll always remember the feeling of moments with you <3

NSFW

don't let this man fool you...

he'll act all nervous and shy at first

he'll blush bright red when you undress in front of him

he'll nervously kiss every inch of your skin, murmuring soft compliments as he goes

he'll shyly ask, "is it okay if i touch you there?"

like he's not about to have you begging for him to keep going

once he realizes how much you're into it, he flips a switch

suddenly his shy little kisses turn into biting your lip

pinning you down

murmuring in a low voice, "i'll take care of you, baby"

he'll start slow, watching you squirm under his touch

but he's secretly enjoying the power of making you lose control

SLEEPER AGENT OF KINK

you think he's all soft neck kisses and hand-holding

then he's tugging your hair, love bites on your shoulder

and growling in your ear, "you like that, don't you?"

his hands, his mouth, and his cock alternate between gentle and rough to keep you on edge <3

the moans he'll let out would be so loud and unrestrained

completely enamored with your body

big fan of overstimulation

thrives on praise

eager to learn as well!!

positions where he can see everything—your expressions, your body, the way you react to his touch—drive him wild

not afraid to try something new!

and when it's all over, he's right back to his soft and sweet self

kissing your forehead and pulling you into his arms like he wasn't doing unspeakable things to you five minutes ago.

can you still guess who my favorite is... 💀 also i'm so sorry for whatever this was

[mychapel-004]

watching people fight over how canon the book of bill is while completely mischaracterising bill is such a strange experience

yes he’s a liar. yes he’s a manipulator. yes he is so distant from any semblance of humanity that he is literally incapable of regret, empathy or remorse, or at least admitting to himself that he feels it.

but he’s also TERRIBLE at it. he’s a total loser. he’s objectively bad at the one task he’s spent lifetimes on. throughout history he attempts to sweet talk many, many different figures into building his portal and it rarely goes down well. multiple civilisations are aware of his existence and the sole reason we know this is because they hated him and invented their own ways of keeping him out. he has been consistently rejected by humanity at every turn, only coming close to completing his goal when he literally possessed a dead man and formed a cult.

ford is the only person who really, truly fell for the act. not just that, but bill didn’t even have to pretend to physically be someone else to get him hooked. ford took him as he was.

all this to say, bill is absolutely a grifter who will say anything to get what he wants, which means a lot of BOB is just sweet talk, carrot and stick, he’s just saying what the reader wants to hear. but that’s not the important bit.

bill is a liar but he wraps the truth up in layers of misdirection, doublespeak and lies. a monster really did destroy his homeworld. him and ford really were going to change the world. he even addresses this in the book, he lies until it becomes the truth. a lot of bill’s characterisation is shown in the gaps between his lies, it’s all in the fault lines, in a similar way to stan. he’s a very meta character, but ultimately he’s still a character and he still behaves in ways that are designed to convey meanings to the audience.

of course he’s lying in the book of bill, but he’s also telling the truth, in addition to bits of info from other sources that he is unable to edit like the theraprism section. it’s fun to have a character who lies a lot, but it would be a pointless exercise to have an entire book be non-canon and false, especially when we get much more interesting character work from the parts where he runs out of lies and his only options are desperate truths.

anyway. people wanting to enjoy canon info in a canon book isn’t just them “being easily manipulated” or stupid, and you aren’t a better fan for not believing it

[uno-san]

Hiii! Could I rq reader who was Fords gf/so before he left and when he comes back he’s happy bc he realizes reader stayed in Gravity Falls the whole time and maybe even helped Stan fix the portal!

But then Bill comes and it’s totally up to u whether to make Bill like super jealous of reader or become just as obsessed with reader as he is with Ford idk.

Thank u!

Hello! Thanks so much for sending in a request. This is the first thing I've written in FOREVER, so I miiiiight have gotten carried away. Hope you and everybody else enjoys!

It always reminded you of the night sky. 

That, or what lied far beyond it. Beyond you, maybe. But never Stanford Pines. Who, in this very moment stood several yards from where you yourself were. The both of you had that strange, not-quite night sky wrapped around your forms. Yet instead of the endless expanse that space was known for, various journals, textbooks, and equations littered that space around you.

It would have been a marvelous sight if you didn’t know the purpose behind this all-too tailored world for Stanford. A trap meant to make him feel seen and applauded in ways you couldn’t quite match. A place for them to meet.

Beside Stanford was another figure. A three-sided one to be exact who had taken place near his shoulder, where he had been far longer than you could have ever known. But here he didn’t need to whisper his lies. Here, the two of them could simply converse and enjoy each other’s company. A wonderful plan to make Stanford feel known while also shutting you out from the light altogether.

Their laughter was uproarious.

“AHAHAHAHA! COME ON, SIXER, YOU DON’T MEAN THAT!”

A shrill voice cut through your observations. The devilish figure that it belonged to had placed his hands over his chest, or stomach, as if he were trying and failing to hold in his joy. His one eye was closed and curved to show a smile that his body didn’t have the means to actually do. His tie meanwhile spun in circles as if a toy had been wound up.

‘Sixer’ had his eyes lowered to the platform of which he stood. Tucked under his arm was one of his prized journals, where each of his six fingers drummed against its spine. He looked bashful under interrogation.

“What, not quite the term your ego would prefer, Bill?” Stanford finally shot back, his gaze raising to meet Bill’s while his eyebrow raised to pose a challenge.

“NOT AT ALL!” 

The demon began to circle around Stanford, who’s whole body began to turn with a determination not to break eye contact again. As if he were afraid of losing sight of Bill. Or his attention. Seeing it reminded you of a puppy enamored with its owner. Its everything, really. You had been familiar with it at some point yourself. What felt like ages ago now.

“JUST SURPRISED, IS ALL. I MEAN, AAAAAAAAALL I’VE DONE IS EXPAND YOUR MIND TO THE UNIVERSE OUTSIDE YOUR PUNY WORLD, SHOW YOU NEW COLORS, AND GIVE YOU THE PERFECT COMEBACKS EVERY TIME YOU GET INTO AN ARGUMENT,” He humbly bragged, “BUT IS THAT ALL REALLY WORTH IT TO BE CALLED YOUR-”

MUSE.

Muse.

Muse.

Muse. Muse. Muse. Muse. Muse. Muse. Muse. Muse. Muse. Muse.

That damn word was going to be imprinted on your brain with how often it was quite literally repeating. Out Loud. High-pitched and nearly shattering your ear drums, a physical manifestation of the word appeared in the space to hurl itself in your direction; A move you’ve seen one too many times. You nimbly dodged off to the side without losing your footing like you had the first time this occurred. With both your feet planted firmly on the ground you whipped your head around to catch the end of the show.

The scene had frozen. Stanford’s expression was stuck in a form of denial, his cheeks tinted a rosy color that you used to make them turn. His brow was furrowed as if he were concerned. Or desperate to assure Bill that he truly was worth it all. Bill meanwhile had his arms folded behind his back while his half-lidded eye bore down on its prey like a benevolent mentor.

Bill’s pupil slowly slid in your direction.

“A BENEVOLENT MUSE, YOU MEAN.”

Bill Cipher became animated again. This time he no longer addressed the version of Stanford standing before him. His smug attention was all focused on you now. His small frame managed to tower over you in mere presence alone, even at the distance you two stood at.

Arms folded behind his back, there was a silence that followed while Bill inspected you. Perhaps waiting for you to give a response before he settled on his own. He feigned surprise.

“DIDN’T EXPECT TO CATCH YOU HERE. SIXER AND I WERE JUST HAVING A MOMENT ALONE,” Bill emphasized, his arm outstretching far past its supposed physical limit to wrap itself around Stanford’s still frame, “YOU KNOW, LIKE WE’VE BEEN HAVING FOR A WHILE. BEHIND YOUR BACK. IN FACT HE WAS JUST ABOUT TO GET TO COMPLIMENTING ME. SINCE I’M HIS MUSE. HIS SKY. STARS. WHATEVER.”

Muse.

Another manifestation hurled its way in your direction. You weren’t nearly as prepared and the edges of the word were sharp, slicing into your arm to draw what you assumed to be blood. With a wince you had to steady your balance before your glare shot back to the bastard in front of you.

He was a menace who you hadn’t realized you had been in competition with for years. And now, in a pissing contest with as the man you’re both fighting over like teenagers was lost in worlds unknown. The man you had loved and had been prepared to marry was gone now. Leaving you with his unfaithful ‘Muse’.

Oh, how you’ve come to hate the word.

It happened first when you had learned of the existence of an other-worldly being that had been secretly leading Stanford’s ambitions. Second was when you had discovered Ford’s hidden collection of idols and paintings. All squirreled away in a private chamber of his own viewing pleasure. That had been manageable.

But the fondness in his gaze when discussing their meetings made your heart ache. How he’d talk as if Bill Cipher was the sole purpose of everything now. His reason for continuing his research or facing adversity for his talents. Or the way he’d pause in the middle of a task to instead laugh at a memory of Bill from earlier, with his hands looking to busy themselves as a distraction.

All of that had hurt. But what made you hate the word most of all was its constant use to torture you. That the moment Bill had sensed your distaste for the term he had done nothing but plague your mind with it. Shoving it in your face as if he was a secret side woman in some stately affair.

Thus far this has been your nightly routine for several months now. Ever since Stanford Pines went missing from this world and so many others. With his brother, Stanley, being left behind with you to pick up the pieces to get back your lost loved one. And for some reason or other, Bill had set his sights on tormenting you.

Every night. Different visions of their bonded moments played in your mind while Bill sneered and poked fun at you for being fool enough to never notice the signs of your man slipping away. You never knew if what he showed you was true. You hoped not.

“THEY’RE REAL.”

You ignore him a moment to get back on two feet. Standing tall before him.

“Do you plan on taking me through your ‘Greatest Hits’ every night or are you going to fuck off already?” The venom in your tone caused interest to gleam in his eye. Most nights you try not to dignify his taunts with a response. But you were tired. Both mentally and physically thanks to late nights with Stanley to try to get the portal running again, or your lonely crying sessions blaming yourself for letting this go on for so long. You were exhausted.

“AW, DIDN’T THINK YOU’D GET SO CRANKY OVER A LITTLE FUN FORDSY AND I WERE HAVING! I’M SURE IT’S EASY TO GET INSECURE OVER THE IDEA OF YOUR MAN GETTING THE CHANCE TO VISIT A SUPERIOR BEING EVERY NIGHT BUT HE MENTIONED YOU ONCE OR TWICE. Y’KNOW, ABOUT HOW YOU’RE ‘SAFE’ AND ‘STABLE’.”

You knew he was just trying to get a rise out of you. Perhaps even deter you from working on that portal any further, ensuring that Stanford would remain lost to mystery forevermore. “Say what you want Bill but I know him better than what your mind creeping could ever do. You miscalculated by seeing only the parts that benefited you and that’s going to end up biting you in the ass. Because it doesn’t matter what you and Stanford had before. Whatever was there is GONE, and I know that Stanford will be coming to end you too.”

It was difficult to keep your voice steady to feign the confidence that you hadn’t had in a long time. You stood bravely in the face of Bill, who’s form only grew in size while you charged up your own argument. He was nearly towering over you now while his gaze remained steady on you. His expression was unreadable.

“WELL WELL WELL, I-”

He’s yapped for far too long.

“Maybe that’s the point to all of this,” You gestured to the spectacle put on pause, “You realize you fucked up. Pushed too hard. Or maybe you’re not even playing this for me. You’re just trying to convince yourself that Ford is still in the palm of your hand when in reality, he despises you. Wants you dead. That despite all the compliments and praises you keep showing me he still picked me over you.”

You weren’t sure if any of this was going to strike a chord. Especially with being in the dark as long as you had, there was nothing for you to fight with. The best you could do was treat him like the vindictive affair partner he was pretending to be. And it worked. Or it was the hint of a suggestion you made in saying you were chosen over him.

Bill’s form skyrocketed in size from its already heightened form, with the triangle now bending over you now to force you to nearly tilt your head all the way back just to make eye contact. His pupil was entirely black to reflect your new surroundings as the static image of Ford and their place of contact was suddenly whisked away. What used to be a bright yellow turned to blood-red bricks that you swore you could feel heat coming off of.

“STANFORD PINES FEARS ME,” Bill’s voice boomed, “AND THAT’S EXACTLY WHERE I WANT HIM. THINKING OF ME AND CHASING AFTER MY COATTAILS UNTIL THAT NERD COMES TO REASON. AND UNTIL THEN YOU-”

His fingers snapped. The ground beneath you disappeared and you felt weightlessness hit as you began to descend into a dark pit. “YOU WILL NEVER SEE HIM AGAIN!”

The vision of the gigantic demon began to fade away. His voice still boomed and echoed despite the void that they were shouted into. As your conscience begins to fade into its own form of nothing you close your eyes to instead repeat his words to yourself.

Never see him again.

__

The Mystery Shack above you groaned with disapproval. Its wood and structure creaked as it finally settled back on the ground, thankfully still supported by its own weight once gravity returned to normal. You were face first on the ground with your head still spinning from that hasty landing you made to resist any damage. With just one peek of an eye you could see that your vision was still hazy. Only a sickeningly familiar blue light kept the basement of the Shack from being in total darkness.

Darkened figures up ahead began to move. When you tried to join them you were quick to discover that your leg caught in debris. A quick examination told you that it wasn’t anything dangerous like active machinery, and the small tugs you gave to test your aching body showed that nothing was quite broken. Hurt, yes, but all intact.

Just like the house you could feel your bones settling back into place while creaking with resentment. You could only imagine how Stanley must have been feeling. Propping yourself up with one arm you then used your freehand to begin pulling away at the rubble on top of you, trying to carefully dismantle it piece by piece so that it wouldn’t collapse on top of you.

Having been so focused on your escape you had only caught the tail-end of what Stanley was telling dipper.

“The author of the Journals…”

Your head whipped around so fast it could have snapped, “My brother.”

As if on cue a figure cladded in a black cloak removed his mask with a six fingered hand, his silver hair whipping around him as he slowly revealed a face you thought you could have anticipated after having aged years with Stanley. The fact that they were twins did little to stop you from tearing up at the handsome visage that was your Stanford Pines.

The wrinkles in his face had deepened from the last you saw him. He was still chiseled with a hint of facial hair he might have shaved off recently while his posture and expression gave off a confidence you weren’t familiar with.

Stanley began to approach him with open arms, prepared to greet the brother he’s missed for years for longer than yours. Stanford didn’t match his sentiments. Instead his fist drew back to strike Stan who had flinched out of the way- But not before Stanford’s fist froze. Left hanging in the air as something else caught his attention. Past Stanley and Dipper. Through various piles of cement and broken wood.

You.

Neither of you moved. His eyes flickered back and forth in a manner that suggested he was examining you all the same. Taking in every detail of your graying form, of each new wrinkle that has marked your age like a tree. The intensity of his gaze made your heart stall for more reasons you could count.

Was that disappointment in his gaze? Or worse, indifference? The world had already been cruel in tearing you apart in the first place. How easy would it be to have Stanford simply forget you? To have moved on to grander and exciting things since his time away. After all, Bill Cipher had enticed him once before. YOU nearly lost him once before. Who’s to say you haven’t wasted your years chasing after a man who could no longer remember your face?

Tears began to gather. They soothed the sting of debris in the air to instead replace it with a dull ache in your heart. At this point you could have been crying over any number of things. You tried calling out his name but the words caught in your throat.

He shouted yours instead. Pushing passed his stunned brother and great nephew to run in your direction. Just as Stanford was a few feet away he suddenly dropped to his knees to slide the remaining distance. It was a physical endeavor you envied in this moment.

Already Stanford’s arms wrapped around your form, drawing you in close to his chest while he buried his face into your hair. You didn’t dare utter a sound of discomfort. Swallowing your tears you chose to focus on his warmth rather than the pain your body was in. How much studier his arms felt from the last time you were held in them, however long ago that was.

“M…My dear…” Stanford gasped, as if the term of endearment hadn’t been uttered in history before. His six fingers nearly dug into your body with his tight grasp. He pressed a kiss to the top of your head, “This…This is real. Bill isn’t lying again. You’re here. You.”

From the corner of your vision you could see both Soos and Mabel staring in wonder. Their mouths were left hanging open while they slowly turned to each other to clasp hands together. Mabel began to mouth ‘they have a histooooory!!’

You opted to turn your face into Stanford’s chest to ignore all that as long as you could.

“All these years I’ve waited here for you, Stanford. Every year was spent fixing the portal, I-” Your eyes wandered to his twin, “-We’ve been fixing the portal. Stan and I together decided we weren’t going to stop until you were home safe.”

Stanford drew in a breath. The tension that coiled his posture was a familiar sign of his frustrations being withheld, and with the copious warnings in his Journals to not open the portal again you had a fairly safe guess as to what that tension was. Stanford managed to swallow it down as his hand cupped your cheek and directed your eyes to his.

The years have really gone by. For the both of you, you realized as you gazed into weary and worldly eyes. Did he see the same thing in you? Or has it occurred to him just how truly long it's been since the two of you were close like this. Since way before he was lost in the first place. To where Bill’s schemes began to put the first cracks in the foundations of your relationship.

From the distance the portal still glowed a blue hue, flickering every few moments as the machine began to lose its life at long last for what you pray is the last time. Both of you were left illuminated with blue. The beautiful sight of Stanford had been imprinted on your mind, nearly washing away the years of trauma the color had come to be associated with.

You could have sworn Stanford’s eyes were brimming with tears as well before they closed, the distance between you two gone as he leaned down to capture your quivering lips in a kiss. With it came the relief of a thirty-year grief. Not of a healed relationship but of a path to recovery and trust. You nearly grinned into the kiss. Stanford Pines chose you.

[ilions-end]

i finished statius' ACHILLEID. thoughts thoughts thoughts:

i knew going in it was a VERY short unfinished epic, but i didn't know it would be FUN?? if i ever get that time machine, FIRST THING i go back and find one publius papinius statius, i lock him in a room, and i'm NOT letting him out until he's finished the achilleid!

achilles is statius' BLORBO in a way neither homer, quintus nor virgil have blorbos. statius likes achilles to be strong and pretty and graceful, but most of all ENDEARING even when he fails. and he fails a lot, because this is him still figuring out how to be an adult, not to mention a prophesied legend literally everyone is waiting for to step up

the one thing that gets tiring is just how many prophecies permeate the achilleid. nothing's left to chance, there are so few unknowns. even ODYSSEUS was aware that from peleus' wedding there would come a child destined to be a central warrior in an upcoming gigantic war.

as it stands, the achilleid is more of a... thetisiad? she is very centered in the narrative (we spend more time looking at things from her point of view than achilles') and there is SO MUCH SYMPATHY for her, oh my gosh!! she loves ONE person, her son, the only worthwhile thing she got out of a traumatizing marriage, and she despairs that he's fated to die young in a silly human war.

also i'm a deidamia defender forever now. so three-dimensional, so clever!

aughhh i love how much characterization statius puts in, even in the small scenes! my favourite example is odysseus and diomedes as they walk up to lycomedes' place (literally just moving characters from A to B). diomedes teases odysseus, and odysseus is delighted to be teased. that night we're told odysseus CAN'T SLEEP because he's too excited about showing off his plan the next morning!

the unveiling of achilles is completely different from the chagrined defeat/"achilles is a fucking idiot" ways i've heard it retold! i love that it's collaborative, it's a mutual triumph. it's just as much achilles (who's been suffering in gender dysphoria hell for a year) longing to be exposed as it is odysseus LIVING for showing everyone (especially diomedes?) how clever he is. it's not just the shield and the spear and the bugle, it's odysseus playing the part of the siren, whispering in achilles' ear that he knows who he is and describing how glorious he will be on the trojan battlefield. it's achilles' grateful relief at being ALLOWED not to pretend anymore as he rips off his own dress even before the bugle calls

also it's very important to me that the moment he's no longer hunching over trying to make himself look small and inoffensive, we're told achilles is taller than both odysseus and diomedes

i KEEP IMAGINING how good statius would have made the rest!! especially because as book ii ends, achilles regards odysseus as a cool uncle; he's the guy who rescued him! i want to think statius would have put in the big mystery quarrel achilles and odysseus are said to have had early in the war, something to drastically change that affection. i want to know how statius would have handled troilus, and the gods. augh statius you roman BLUEBALLER

an assortment of story beats still revolving in my head:

chiron is such a sweetheart!! he's SO gallant with thetis, he's so affectionate with achilles. he HIDES HIS TEARS when achilles leaves, awww

statius writes out phoinix completely. as a phoinix stan i object. sure chiron can raise young achilles, but i NEED phoinix to tend to him as a baby

i enjoy how achilles EXPLODES into a mess of teenagerly hormones when he first sees deidaima. it's so funny that thetis is looking on (and we get my favourite simile of the achilleid, of a herdsman delighting in a young bull snorting and foaming at a beautiful heifer) like "aaaaand there's my son's sexual awakening. i see! well, we can use that" and THAT explains why achilles is so willing to commit to the female disguise

(listen. listen. few things mean more to me than the love between achilles and patroclus. but achilles is a teenage boy at the age when a fucking breeze will give him a boner, and deidamia is the most beautiful and the cleverest of her sisters. i really enjoy a story where achilles and deidamia are neither "fated eternal true love" or one's a sneaky opportunist. it's much more compelling that they're both knots of budding emotions and bodily feedback)

i notice that statius never uses the name pyrrha, he doesn't seem to have a fake name at all, just "achilles' sister"

lycomedes is SO honoured and proud that thetis is entrusting her daughter to him. i feel sorry for lycomedes, he seems so earnest and hasn't done anything to get tricked

the one thing i can't forgive statius for is that after spending SO much time establishing that achilles and deidamia (who knows he's a guy) are genuinely into each other, it feels like statius goes OUT OF HIS WAY assuring us that their first sexual encounter is rape. sure they talk right after, deidamia forgives him, AND i understand there are social rules that makes deidamia more "honourable" and "worthy" when she resists, but like. sigh.

aLONG with the previously mentioned interplay between odysseus and diomedes as they walk up to lycomedes' court, there's a simile where they're both starving wolves on the hunt. so sexy it's almost illegal

the feast scene is SO FUNNY omg. all of achilles' careful feminine training dissolving because odysseus and diomedes are there with their boundless masculinity for him to feed off of. deidamia practically WRESTLING achilles back down on the couch every time he forgets himself and behaves too much like a man. odysseus chatting with lycomedes SPECIFICALLY trying to rile up achilles, and then after the women have left (achilles dragging his feet and looking back, YEARNING for their male company) odysseus specifically praises the maiden's "almost masculine" beauty (because ohh he suspects. he just needs to prove it in the morning. he can't SLEEP for it)

when they depart, achilles earnestly swears to deidamia that no other women shall ever bear his children. i find it interesting as a reminder of the social rules of its era. neither of them expect achilles to be sexually exclusive, just not fathering potential heirs. which again makes me wonder about the contraceptives in ancient greece

on the ship towards aulis, diomedes begs achilles to tell them all about his feats and training with chiron, and achilles is so shy about it! who can blame him! diomedes has a WAY more impressive track record

odysseus is SO good at firing up achilles' outrage at paris even as he's just catching him up on what the war's about. and he's so pleased at how easily achilles' outrage can be directed! you KNOW that would have developed in such an interesting way AUGH THE REST WOULD HAVE BEEN SO GOOD.

[disneytva]

"Gravity Falls: The Book Of Bill" Panel Brings Insight In The Nightmares.

Gravity Falls fans went trought behind the secrets of The Book Of Bill who took the internet by storm, the panel also had the book artists Ian Worrel ("Gravity Falls", "Amphibia") and Joe Pitt ("Gravity Falls", Disney TVA pilot "Park Poppers")

Photos by Karla Garcia and Disney Publishing Worldwide

-Ian Worrel, Joe Pitt and Alex Hirsch all met in an Animation summer camp in High School

-Adrian Molina (Pixar Animation Studios "Coco", "Elio") was also one of the fellow classmates of Alex, Ian and Pitt at CalArts

-One of the reasons to make The Book of Bill was to work again with the former Gravity Falls crew

-Bill started as an inside joke in the Gravity Falls production as Alex wanted him to be a foil and to make Dipper crazy with his conspiracy theories and the crew decided to put it on every episode and the opening credits sequence

-Bill was almost a meme before it was a character, the zodiac was made up at last minute

-The Book Of Bill has been a New York Times Seller for 3 months in a row

-One fan who owns a book store told Alex, Pitt and Worrel that The Book Of Bill sold out on his book store

-Alex Hirsch reaction to the reception of The Book Of Bill has been terryfing and surprising as he thanks the fans for still loving Gravity Falls after all these years

-Ian Worrel's favorite pages where the "Dream Statues" page and the Pines Family group photo who didn't knew it was going to be burned at the end

-Alex Hirsch favorite joke was Bill playing the Xylophone apologizing for Weirdmaggedon

-Ian Worrel's process for the statue page was made all in VR

-Joe Pitt's favorite page was the bad end alternate universes of Dipper and Mabel

-Alex being asked about an Alternate Reality we’re Dipper was trapped in a Bubble rather than Mabel with the awnser being Dipper's Bubble being him and Ford having an X-Files show and Mabel saving him by the same way he saved her.

-Alex being asked if Bill loves The Duchess Approves with Alex awnsering that he loves it and likes fan-art on his alt-account

-Alex being asked what were Bill and the Axolotls’ prior relationship? Alex awnsers that he dosn't want to give lore for free

-Alex being asked for some more information on Bill’s Home Dimension? Alex had two pages with many information on Bill's Dimension but he kept it secret and decided to release them as of yet.

-Alex being asked before creating the Book of Bill did he ever consider creating something on his own or continuing Gravity Falls? Alex is very open to make more Gravity Falls books after the explosive sucess of The Book Of Bill that surprised Disney Press, Ian Worrel, Alex and Joe Pitt.

-Alex being asked about the process of editing and adding all the Ciphers and Codes into Gravity Falls? The codes and ciphers where added at last minute on the episodes for Alex the codes where so much fun.

-Alex being asked if he could tell us any additional canon about the secrets of Dipper and Mabel and anything beyond the Book of Bill? As of yet Alex cannot speak on Mabel and Dipper's backstory

-Alex being asked to elaborate more on Stan’s Nightmare? Alex talks about a story of Bill entering Stan’s mind to try and strike a deal with him with Stan not being fooled by Bill's tricks.

-Alex being asked since originally The Book of Bill was meant to be more of a “Bible of Bill” did he at one point want to lean more into the idea of “Ciphertology”? There's more and maybe one day he will reveal it.

-Alex on Billford relationship on The Book Of Bill: If anyone in your life is like Bill Cipher RUN AWAY FROM IT!

[lkfarrout]

I need everyone to understand that Stan and Mabel are SMART. Ford and Dipper are often portrayed as the smart ones while Stan and Mabel are the "stupid twins" but here's the thing: Stan and Mabel are just as intelligent as their twins, they just care about different things.

Alex himself, in one of the episode commentaries (Little Dipper, I believe) says that Mabel is just as smart, if not smarter than Dipper, and could beat him at chess if she wanted to. But she cares more about playing pretend with the cute horses instead.

Mabel is also a genuis when it comes to crafting. If you've never done something like knitting before, you have no idea how hard it is and how impressive it is for Mabel to make all the sweaters and things that she does. Maybe not all her sweaters are handmade, but the Waddles sweater and Goodbye Stan sweater are crazy impressive on their own. There's also Wax Stan, all the puppets, and many other examples. Those types of things take a lot of planning, math, practice, and expertise.

Stan is portrayed as being lazy and dumb in high school because he copies off of Ford in class and has a very lame science fair project compared to Ford, but Stan shows ambition in other areas during that time of his life.

For one, he builds what we can assume to be a sea-worthy vessel out of basically scraps of old wood ("Tony Stark was able to build this in a cave! With a box of scraps!"). I personally don't know anyone - much less a teenager - who could do that, especially in a time before youtube. And while Ford definitely did help Stan with the boat, we can tell by their feelings about it that Stan really did put in most of the work and care.

Another example, and a more subtle one, is that Stan was able to save up and purchase a nice, new (7 or 8 years old at the most) convertible catillac by the age of seventeen. He probably spent a lot of time working outside of school to accomplish that, while Ford was more focused on work inside of school. It's highly doubtful that Filbrick would have bought the car for Stan. Stan was highly ambitious during this time in his life, just like Ford was, but in different areas.

In the Land Before Swine commentary, Stan talks about working on the portal and says he had to learn "high school math". He really thought that what he was doing all that time was high school level math when really, it was probably closer to masters-level theoretical physics. This tells me that he probably didn't struggle with the math parts all that much, and because it wasn't super hard for him, he assumed it must have been high school level because he's far too dumb to do anything harder than that. Yes, it still took him 30 years, but that's mostly due to him not having access to all the blueprints that Bill helped Ford create.

All in all, I believe that Stan and Mabel are just as smart as their twins, but it isn't picked up on because the areas that they like to focus on are seen as silly and girly (in Mabel's case) or unprofitable and a waste of time (in Stan's case). In constrast, Dipper's intellectual efforts of solving mysteries, cracking codes, and doing things like converting a CD into a record (impressive!) further the plot of the show and are thus seen as more important. Just like how Ford's academic efforts are seen as profitable and thus more worthy of praise.

I'm of course not saying that Stan and Mabel are better than Dipper and Ford in any way - all the characters have their strengths and weaknesses and I love that about them. I love all four of the Pines Twins so much - they all have so much to offer and are all so smart. I really love this show and they way it creates depth with the characters, and I love analyzing them and writing commentary on them.

[hamsternella]

please do a NSFW alphabet of Stanley Pines, please I'm begging you. The one with Ford was amazing.

Here it is!

Stanley Pines NSFW Alphabet

A= Aftercare (what they're like after sex)

It takes him some time to catch his breath, but rest assured that through it all Stan will be wrapping your body in a gentle embrace, accompanied by his laughter. He always tells you how much he loved the encounter, and how beautiful you look despite the sweat and the palpable smell of sex. Not exactly romantic; but amidst all the talk and laughter you always find in his eyes a look of intense love and tenderness.

B= Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Did you know that in addition to generating conflict and lying a lot, Stan's mouth is good for other kinds of really cool stuff? Like giving you the strongest orgasms and the deepest kisses. If he had to choose, it would always be his mouth. His penis, too—but that last one doesn't exactly sound amazing. Of course his cock feels great; but he prefers that with which he can confess to you precious things, like how much he loves you, or how hot you look riding him. Stan is an expert with words.

Now, as for you… it's complicated. Stan loves everything about you—your whole body is his favorite thing. But if you were to urge him to pick one in particular, he'd say your face. There are many things that turn him on; but your face, in particular, gets him more than anything else in the world. Seeing you in his eyes as he pushes your head so you swallow his cock whole, gasping at you about how good you're being to him and that you're in for a great reward for being so obedient, makes Stan lose himself in a limbo of unimaginable pleasure.

C= Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He cums a lot and hard. He loves to do it on your ass, or inside your mouth; always making sure you've swallowed it all. If you would give him the approval, then he would also do it inside you.

D= Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

When Stanley can't stand the growing desire for you that consumes him, the cameras tracking your position throughout the cabin help him lessen the need. Whether it's paperwork, business matters, the presence of many buyers or your own personal affairs, Stan tries to use any excuse to control himself, although there are days when it's impossible. A little of your figure or your smile helps him enjoy himself in the privacy of his office.

It's not always him patting his bulge through his pants, his body leaning fully against the chair; sometimes it's the necessity of having to watch you smile while he lets out sighs like an idiot losing his breath because of love. Whether it's one or the other, Stan refuses to let you catch him daydreaming in the gloom of his office. How are you supposed to look him in the face if you knew the adolescent attitudes he has in privacy?

Some recordings end up saved for when you're away. Eventually this guy takes up the activity of taking pictures—of which you don't ever have to know. Unless you find the box tucked away in the back of the closet, of course.

E= Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Very experienced. Your first night with Stan is unforgettable, and all those that follow equally so. He knows exactly what to do and say to make you a mess; no matter the place or the situation. He is a man who has lived diverse experiences, which help fuel everything that crosses his mind about sex. Rough, tough; soft or sweet—whatever you want and however you want. Stan is willing to teach you everything it takes to make you feel good.

F= Favorite position

It would be difficult to decide the best position, but there are a couple that always end up being used the most.

Rocking horse, because it's the easiest way to have your face close to his, with your eyes on his—the intense gaze of your man devouring your whole figure as you ride him. Impossible to lose sight of you. Stan loves that.

Missionary, because who doesn't love the classics? Nothing better than owning your body from above, bursting into your core with every thrust as Stan rips out a couple of those sweet sounds he loves so much.

Doggy, because if there's one other thing that drives him crazy, it's being able to take the tender flesh of your ass between his hands while watching himself enter you. Stan can grab you by the hair, caress your back or handle you at will. Better yet: you won't see his face when you moan his name; the way his eyes fill with longing.

G= Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Stan is as serious as he can get. He won't be a sea of laughter or jokes, but neither will he be completely at the mercy of an unflappable face or a tense body. A joke here, a joke there; sometimes a couple of stifled chuckles and crooked smiles, but all a product of the situation itself and the emotions that overwhelm him. It's nothing to be uncomfortable about, I assure you. Stan is a playful guy, who enjoys seeing you made a mess in his hands. Some humor doesn't hurt; but be assured that nothing he does or says is going to be to make fun of you in a bad way.

The effect is always the opposite, in fact.

H= Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

Hairy and unkempt. That's just the way he is. Stan attributes it to his genes, no matter how much you insist that fixing it is a separate issue. Of course, if that's the way you like it, there won't be a problem; but if it's the other way around, and no matter how much he complains about it, rest assured that Stan will get to work to at least trim it a little. The truth is, he likes hair—and that includes you, too. There is no need to feel ashamed!

I= Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Extremely aware of your needs, which was a surprise the first time together. Stan may seem like a difficult guy —because he certainly is—, but in privacy his heart comes out, even with the heaviness of carnal desire upon you. He's a sensitive man; his rough hands always shy when the heat of the moment subsides, his eyes heavy with concern and his face red, sweaty.

The hoarse words of love and hugs are not lacking. Never. There comes a point where you consider that he needs it more than you do.

J= Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Stan used to do it regularly when he first met you, being that you didn't see each other often. But once you put your presence in the cabin, the masturbation thing becomes more of a regular occurrence if you two do it together. Stan loves to watch you touch yourself in front of him; just as many other times he did it himself to play with you, watching you get desperate. It's that way you see him so hungry, so needy, that makes him throw himself on you, bending your body over as best he can to fill you up.

Seeing you is all he needs—you are all he needs.

K= Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Blindfold sex, dominance and praise kink.

L= Location (favorite places to do the do)

Naughty hands are everywhere. Stan allows you a moment's respite when there are people around; but there will always be a kiss or a couple of dirty words stirring up the floor. Now, when it comes to sex he prefers private places, because the last thing he wants is to risk being seen by someone else; or being interrupted and causing a scene. Sometimes Stan has certain fantasies, but they don't amount to much for the same reasons. The bedroom or office —even the kitchen or bathroom, if you're alone— is more than enough. He's a simple guy.

The car is another perfect place. You are the best travel companion!

M= Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

If you make a pass at him or if you get rebellious Stan feels his pants bothering him. Suddenly his hands itch with the need to put you in your place—maybe a good spanking will help make you say all those dirty things that make him push his cock all the way down your throat.

If you use honesty to tell him how much you need him you may be spared punishment, but still get what you want so badly. Stan tends to warm up to your honesty when it comes to him. This guy loves that you want him as much as he wants you. That's what love is like.

N= No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Some burning is fine if you let him; but direct harm and anything else you dislike is a complete NO.

O= Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Stan loves to give oral. He loves the taste of you in his mouth and the way you squirm. But oh, my, he'd be lying if he said he doesn't prefer to have you with your mouth wide open and your eyes full of tears. How this man loves to keep you warm and full to the brim; wet lips and his hands on your head or your cheeks, cheering you on from above with pride shining in his gaze—because you're so good and you do it perfect, so well. You look beautiful when all you do is eat pure cock.

P= Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Slow at first, not so deep because he prefers to savor the pressure around him. Then it's a constant of hard and fast movements.

Q= Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

He likes them a lot, but it is something that tires him out and eventually the time comes to accept that at his age it is an activity that requires preparation and patience. At the end of the day Stan prefers regular foreplay, and the actual sex in the bedroom, in peace.

R= Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Stan is willing to experiment and take risks. He has no problem with it. As long as these kinds of experiments don't involve other people, of course; other than that there are plenty of things he's willing to put into practice with you.

S= Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

At the moment Stan gives the impression that he is a beast, but when the heat of said moment subsides you realize that he tires quite quickly, and doesn't give room for many rounds. Not that it is so necessary, either, because such is the intensity of the sex that there is nothing else to bring to the table. It's something that at first gave Stan insecurities—all this about his inability to go further. But a talk with you is enough to clear up certain misunderstandings.

Sex is amazing, especially because it's between you. There's nothing more to say.

T= Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

YES, no more questions. Stan is more than willing to experiment with you. Either using them with you, or even letting you do it with him. Whatever it is, it's a matter of finding out what else comes out of all this. Possibly fun! That's never lacking with Stan.

U= Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Very much so. Even though you tell him it's hopeless, he loves seeing you so needy. It's like an addiction—seeing that face and those eyes, that way your lips quiver. Stan would never stop doing it. He doesn't plan to, either.

V= Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Grunts and gasps, lots of dirty talk in between. It's almost at the end that the sounds increase, but he always manages to drown out most of them.

W= Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Stan is not only a very jealous person, but also extremely insecure. There are many ghosts from his past that still haunt him; that persist since you came into his life, to be more specific. It's complicated for him, but talking about it with you makes him embarrassed. Words of affirmation and acts of service always help to remind him how important he is to you.

On the other hand, Stan is touch starved. It's one thing to rub hands together, to just kiss, or to smile and flirt in public. But it's a different story when you're alone together: cuddling to sleep, deep kisses and confessions of an almost needy, even timid love. He is simply lost in you. You're so perfect that maybe you're not even real.

X= X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Not so long—but thick. Slightly curved downward, with a fat head.

Y= Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Stan needs you badly. That's all you need to know. Even if there is no sex, touch is never lacking. It would be a crime not to be able to enjoy your skin against his; the heat of your body feeding that desire that burns inside him. Stan needs you with a voracious hunger.

The longing is too much if it's about you.

Z= Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Very fast. It's hard for him to keep his eyes open, but at least he manages to talk to you a little to make sure you're okay before he falls asleep in your arms. The caresses are not lacking; his fingers still tremble in your hair as sleep takes hold of him.

Can there be anything better than sleeping next to you?

[pissholesinthesn0w]

On This Night, In This Light - Matty Healy x Reader

well, here it is! the long awaited (by mostly me) Christmas party cheating fic. This is the very idea that brought me to tumblr in the first place, looking to find something similar to this scenario that was truly rotting my brain last holiday season. I had been hesitant to even write it because I wanted to do it justice. A lot of work went into this one, it’s my longest piece I have written, and I think I was able to convey what I wanted to. Anyway blah blah I hope you like it. 🎄

also shoutout to everyone who encouraged and helped me with the writing of this!! @theseventyfive, @mattyhealyarmpits, @honeydiveintome, @sugar-coat-it & @kate-the1975✊

contains: smut 18+, cheating(ish), unprotected sex, gagging, extremely questionable morals

5.2k words

“I’m so excited for you to meet my family,” Ryan squeezes your leg as he pulls the car into the driveway of his aunt’s house. “Think they’ll like me?” You ask halfheartedly. This was far too much, far too soon. He was never meant to be more than a one night stand; but he was nice enough. Plus, you didn’t have anywhere else to go for Christmas so this seemed like a decent choice.

“Of course, what’s not to like?” He smiles at you, leaning over to kiss your cheek. You smile back reluctantly, watching as he practically launches himself out of the drivers seat, coming over to the passenger side to open your door for you. You stand up, smoothing down your sweater dress. Your boots crunch against the snow as he slams the door shut and grabs your hand.

“Thank you for coming,” he says. “It will be fun, I promise.” He tells you, pushing a stand of hair behind your ear and planting a kiss on your hand. You smile weakly, hoping you could will yourself to make it through the night. You didn’t want to ruin his Christmas. The both of you look up at the house, a mid century modern home that was very impressive. You knew he came from money, but this?

Before you even get to the front door it swings open, an older woman with short, bright blonde hair and cat eye glasses greets you with a smile. “Ryan! Dear I am so happy to see you! Come in, come in,” she motions the both of you and you follow his lead in the doorway. She wraps her arms around his shoulders enthusiastically, swaying the both of them side to side in a giant hug. Ryan tells him your name and she doesn’t hesitate to give you the same great big hug he’d just given your him. She was very friendly, you thought.

“I’m Denise, so pleased to have you both. Please, take off your coat and shoes, you can put them over here,” she walks over to the coat closet where there were already lots of coats hanging. You wondered how many people would be attending this family dinner, it made you feel a little less out of place knowing it wasn’t super intimate. After pulling off your outerwear, Ryan grabs your hand and you make your way into the kitchen.

You see the counter is full of champagne glasses, half full with a pale amber liquid, the smell of delicious food filling your senses. He picks two up and hands you one, lifting his for a cheers. You oblige, taking it and clinking your glasses together. One sip and wow, you’d never tasted champagne so luxurious. As you made your way to the living area at the back of the house, it became very apparent that his family had money money.

You exchange pleasantries with the members of his family, all warm and welcoming. People were still trickling in as you sat next to your Ryan on the couch, thigh to thigh, as he chatted with his cousins about some sports thing you couldn’t care less about. You mostly just smiled and agreed, as you had nothing to add to the conversation. It was feeling stuffy, you tug on the collar of your sweater, fanning your face. The 2 glasses of champagne you’d had was warming you up from the inside out.

A loud, infectious laugh echos from the front of the house as you hear the screen door creak and slam shut. “Is that fucking Matty?” Ryan stands quickly, all but slamming his glass down on the coffee table. You lift your head with curious eyes to see him. That was his cousin Matty? Your boyfriend had talked about him a few times, but you had never expected him to look like this. He seemed to be the most well dressed of the bunch, wearing a crisp white button up with a black tie and slacks. He was at least a few years older, his gray streaked hair was gelled with his sunglasses pushed back. He looked positively stunning without even trying and suddenly you weren’t sure how you’d make it through this dinner. Matty opens his arms gleefully, wrapping them around Ryan’s shoulder. “Missed ya, mate!” Matty exclaims, rubbing his back. “It’s so good to see you,” Ryan says cheerfully, before looking to you and motioning for you to come over.You scramble to your feet, adjusting your skirt and thigh high socks, all too nervous to approach the two of them. “Matty, this is my beautiful- erm-“ “friend!” You cut him off, nodding as your Ryan introduces you by name to Matty, and he sticks out his hand. Your cheeks flush and heat creeps across your chest as you take his hand in yours; large, calloused and completely sure. You feel his gaze burn into you for a beat before he replies.

“Hello, darling, pleasure to meet you.” You feel his eyes rake over your body and in any other circumstance you’d for sure go home with this guy. But you weren't entirely convinced you would be able to resist, even now.

“Nice to meet you, Matty,” you say, shooting him a sweet smile. You look over to Ryan and he’s beet red, embarrassed. You try to will the thoughts away as Ryan and Matty head towards the kitchen, probably to grab another drink. You watch them leave and cannot shake the feeling that this was going to be a night you won’t forget.

You reclaim your spot on the couch, trying to focus on the small talk within the living room, but your mind wanders elsewhere. Your “friend” rejoins you, alone.

“How’re you feeling?” He whispers into your ear, squeezing your thigh. “Good, I’m good. Everyone is super nice, the house is beautiful,” you tell him. And you mean that, you could already tell this family was genuine and you felt so welcome.

“‘Friend’, huh?,” he laughs nervously but you could tell he didn’t find it funny. You shrug. “We’re friends, aren’t we?” You nudge him with your shoulder and he just shakes his head with a sigh. You do feel a pang of guilt in your gut, but you never promised him anything. It’s not your fault he is presumptuous.

You continue in light conversation with some of his family, and your eyes are drawn to Matty as he walks in and sits at the small card table across the room.

You scan the room, trying not to be obvious as you meet his gaze. He takes a drink, looking at you over the rim of his glass with those fucking eyes, half moon and deep brown and wanting. Your cheeks flush and your heart is racing. He made you nervous, too nervous, and the smirk on his face let you know he knew exactly the effect he had on you.

Two could play this game, you thought. You uncross your legs and spread them open slightly, still looking directly at Matty. His eyebrows lift in surprise and he bites his lower lip, shaking his head at you. You watch him finish his drink, Adam’s Apple bobbing in his throat.

This called for more champagne, you thought. You excuse yourself from the conversation and make your way over to the kitchen grab a glass, something to calm your nerves. As you grab another glass, you suddenly feel a presence behind you, dark and looming as you turn your head and see Matty standing way too close.

“S’cuse me, darling,” he muttered as he reaches around you to grab a glass. your feet feel glued to the floor, your brain complete mush as you unable to move or speak. You feel the front of him against your back, solid and warm. You smell his cologne, musky and floral mixed with cigarettes on his breath.

“Oh, sorry,” you mutter, taking a step back and accidentally landing on his foot. “Shit- sorry!” You fumble with the glass and almost spill it all over the counter before he grabs your elbow, steadying you.

“You’re good,” he reassures you, giving your arm a squeeze. “Don’t have to be so nervous, love. Not so cheeky now, are you?” You can hear his smirk as he leans down and whispers to you. Heat pools in your lower belly, the condescension dripping in his voice made you want to drop to your knees and-

“I am not nervous, you just startled me,” you say, straightening your posture and shrugging his hand off of you. His eyes bore into yours, a mischievous shade of brown.

He chuckles, raising his hands. “Oi, she’s fiesty.” Your cheeks burn red. “You seem a bit pent up. How’s my cousin treating you, he taking care of you?” He mutters in your ear.

“What? Yeah, we’re friends, I mean,” you sigh. “He’s sweet, super nice, but-“ you taper off, looking over to Ryan. He was nice, just… boring.

“Oh yeah, he’s great,” Matty nods in agreement, taking a gulp of his drink. “Super nice.” You nod in agreement, distracted by the way his white shirt hugged his shoulders, the tie hanging loosely around his neck. “Goin’ out for a smoke, you coming?”

You look at Ryan again, and he’s lost in conversation with his family. He wouldn’t even notice you’re gone, would he?

”Yeah, sure, let’s go.”

— —

The sun has set in the sky as you stand next to Matty, shivering with your hands in your coat pockets. “Should get a better coat, love.” Matty says.

“I have one, just wouldn’t go well with this outfit,” you motion downwards, showing off your short skirt and socks. You thought it may be too much for a family dinner, but now you were glad you wore them. Matty lights his cigarette and blows out the smoke. He looked positively gorgeous in the warm glow of the Christmas lights. You wanted to memorize everything about him, every curve, every shadow.

“Very nice outfit,” Matty chokes out, looking off into nowhere.

“So where’s your girlfriend?” You ask, feeling warm and bold as the alcohol settles into your bloodstream.

Matty sighs, “don’t have one at the moment. On tour, very busy, don’t have much time,” he rattles on, and a wave of excitement fills you.

“No fuck buddies?”

“Nah, been there, done that. Too much work to keep up. Is that what you and him are? Fuck buddies?” He motions toward the house.

You snort, looking down as you play with the hem of your skirt. “No, no. Well, sort of, I guess. Like I said, he’s a nice guy.”

“But he doesn’t fuck you properly?” Matty asks, nonchalantly as he takes another drag from his cigarette, cheeks hollowed. You stare at the red glow and you almost choke on your spit.

“Would you be quiet?!” You half whisper, eliciting a cheesy smile from Matty. “Relax, everyone’s doing their own thing, they’re not paying attention to us. You didn’t answer the question, by the way.”

You exhale. “No, not really.”

“That’s a shame, darling.” Matty drops his cigarette and stomps it into the cement with his boot.

You look in the window behind him, you grab his arm and drag him over to the side of the yard, out of sight.

“Whoa, where you taking me love?” Matty asks playfully, letting you take him where you please.

“You gotta stop calling that unless you want me to fall in love with you, I’m serious,” you shake your head at him, in slight disbelief of the situation you got yourself in.

He laughs and your heart skips a beat. Without thinking, you fall into him, pushing him against the side of the house and crash your lips into his, wrapping your arms around his shoulders as he runs his hands up your back, returning your kiss with fervor. Heat runs through you as you swallow his moans, trying to keep quiet. “Tryin to shag me in the yard, dirty girl,” he mumbles.

“Not in the yard, what kind of girl do you take me for?” You say, catching your breath.

“A very hot girl,” Matty laughs. He was such a man. “Seriously, what about your erm, friend? Won’t he be upset?”

“Can we not talk about him for five minutes? I should be getting back inside though. He’s going to notice we’re both gone.” You say, rubbing your lip gloss off of his lower lip with your thumb. He grips your hand firmly. and takes your thumb into his mouth, wrapping his soft lips around the digit and you freeze. You have to stop yourself from letting out a moan, because dear god he was so sexy. You feel his tongue swirl around your finger and your knees almost buckle.

“Fuck,” you mutter, eyes wide in disbelief as he pulls your thumb out with a pop. He wipes his mouth with the back of his hand, adjusting his pants to hide his growing bulge. “That all it takes to get you worked up, huh?” You tease, running your fingers through your hair and adjusting your clothing so it doesn’t look like you were just making out with someone.

“So you’re saying if I feel you up under your skirt, your little panties won’t be soaked, sweetheart?” Matty asks casually and doesn’t let you answer. “Back in, let’s go. You go first.”

You don’t have it in you to argue at the moment. You make your way back inside, peeling off your coat and you can hear Ryan’s laugh from across the room, great. He spots you.

“Hey babe!” He practically shouts at you, his loud mouth giving you the feeling he’s quite tipsy already. You smile weakly as you make your way to him. He throws his arm around your shoulder. “Beautiful, isn’t she?” He asks no one in particular as you hear the screen door shut. It was Matty, and all you could do was hope he would just ignore you both. But, you wouldn’t be so lucky.

“Gorgeous,” Matty chimes in. “How’d you guys meet?” He asks curiously and you want to run away and hide. Instead you take a seat on the empty couch.

“We were in the same lit class, took a few times to get her to agree to go out with me but she finally said yes. Hard to get, this one,” he says and you roll your eyes.

Matty chuckles. “Now look at you, oh to be young and in love.”

“Well-“ you start before Denise calls everyone in for dinner, and you thanked god for it. Ryan grabs your hand and you take your seat at the table. To your dismay, Matty pulls out the chair next to you and sits down, wiggling his eyebrows at you and you let out a sigh, more dramatic than you intended and Ryan asks if you’re ok.

“Yeah, yeah, fine,” you smile. You’re very aware of the way Matty’s boot is touching the side of yours, your nerves alight with the smallest point of contact.

— —

Dinner was great, everything went fine as you all ate, you’d catch Matty’s eye every few minutes and a flood of nerves shot through you, blood rushing hot in your veins. You play with the hemline of your sweater and realize you need a moment to yourself, a moment to breathe without prying eyes on you.

“Hey, where’s the bathroom?” You ask Ryan, and he points to the stairs. “Want me to take you?” He asks, running his hand up your thigh and you slap him away.

“No, I can find it. Be back,” you say, giving his shoulders a quick squeeze as you make your way to the staircase. You look over at Matty and he takes a big gulp of his drink, his eyes dark and sinister over the rim of the glass.

You shut the bathroom door behind you and catch yourself in the mirror. Your cheeks were flushed pink and your lip gloss was the slightest bit smudged. You feel brazen and peel your underwear off, the fabric sticking uncomfortably to you with your wetness.

There’s a knock on the door and before you can say anything it swings open, Matty standing casually in the hallway. “Hello?” You say, trying to act surprised that he followed you up here.

“Hi, sweets,” he smiles, looking down directly at your soaked panties in your hand. “What do you have there?” He asks, leaning against the doorframe. His lips curve into a smile as he sees you weigh your options for a second before pulling him inside and shutting the door quietly.

“You’re a little minx, aren’t you? Sitting all pretty up here waiting for me while my whole family is downstairs,” he teases, taking a step toward you. “Filthy girl.” He grabs the soaked fabric from your hand and shoves it in his pocket. You shudder, the anticipation growing in your gut as he rolls up the his sleeves, revealing a littering of tattoos.

“Maybe,” you ponder, squeezing your thighs together.

He cages you in, hands on either side of you and presses you up against the wall, his body firm. “Tell me to fuck off, and I will,” he breathes into the shell of your ear before planting a soft kiss on your jawline, causing your knees to buckle underneath you.

“No,” you mutter, and he hums in response, grabbing your hips and digging his fingers in. “Want me to fuck you, sweet girl?” A flood of arousal gushes out of you, thighs turning sticky with your honey. You nod feverishly and Matty falls to his knees, calloused hands run up the backs of your thighs and involuntarily your hips buck forward, ready to give him all of you.

“Can I?” He asks, looking up at you through thick lashes while he plays with the hem of your skirt. “Please, please,” you beg, fighting the urge to grab his head and shove it between your legs. “Been thinking about this since I saw you with these fucking stockings,” he runs his hands up your legs before pushing up your skirt, admiring you for a moment. “Aw, look how wet you are darling, should’ve just said so. Really would’ve fucked you right out on the lawn,” he teases and licks a broad stripe up your center.

You grip onto the side of the sink, letting out a sharp moan that you instantly knew was too fucking loud given the circumstances. “Shh, shh, you’ve got to be quiet, can you do that for me?” Matty asks, littering kisses on your inner thighs. “M’sorry, I’ll be quiet, promise,” you breathe and he dives back in and kisses your cunt before running his tongue along your folds, moaning into you as he tastes you. “Sweet little cunt, I’d be devouring you every single fuckin’ night,” he mumbles, circling his tongue around your swollen bud and giving it a harsh suck before sliding a finger inside of you. “Oh my god,” you grab his shoulders and he pushes your right leg up against the wall to spread you open even more. Your vision goes hazy as pleasure consumes you. He sets a teasing pace as he fingers you, slipping one more in before he curls them just right and he looks to you for your response, smug look on his face that made it obvious he knew exactly what he was doing. “Right there?” He asks as he hits that spot inside of you over and over again. Pleasure blooms inside of you as he picks up his pace, filthy wet sounds filling up the bathroom. His mouth is insistent on your clit, alternating between sucking and licking, moaning into you as his fingers never relent.

Your leg underneath you shakes as you struggle to keep yourself upright. “I’ve got you,” he says, pulling out of you and helping you lower your leg, giving your ass a quick squeeze before he is on his feet again, crashing his lips into yours as he pushes you into the wall even more, you can feel him hard against you, straining against his trousers. He runs his hands up back under your sweater and you feel him unhook your bra, a motion you could tell he’d done many times given how easily he got it open. He grabs a handful of your breast, squeezing gently and you sigh, throwing your head back as he rubs his thumb over your peaked nipple. “Off, off,” you breathe as you feverishly pull off your sweater and toss it haphazardly across the bathroom tile. “Beautiful,” he says, admiring you as he kisses your tits. His hot mouth wraps around one nipple, tongue running along your sensitive bud, thumb pinching and tweaking the other. You run toe fingers through his hair, pushing him into you more. His teeth graze your skin and your body jerks, you feel his smile against your flesh.

You snake your hand between your bodies and rub against his bulge, a shuddering breath leaving lips. “Fuck, s’good,” he groans as he moves up to your neck, his teeth grazing your skin and some sick part of you hoped it would leave marks.

“I wanna suck you off,” you whisper, pulling his face up to meet yours, licking into his mouth as you continue to rub his hard cock under his pants. He lets out a sharp breath. “Yeah? Gorgeous girl wants to suck my dick? Yeah, ok, get me out, darling,” he looks down as you sink to your knees slowly, eyes about glazed over while you fumble with his belt. “This off too, please, want to see you,” you tug on the bottom of his shirt and he obliges, unbuttoning each button with nimble fingers while you watch. He shrugs off his shirt and your jaw drops, his inked skin and making him even more attractive than he was before. He was lean but fit, tight muscles and the littering of hair below his navel shot heat right through you.

You trace the outline of his hip tattoo, a beautiful blue rose that read we are kings.

“Look at you,” you say under your breath, quickly losing focus of the task at hand. He threads his fingers through your hair and he undoes his buckle with one hand. You pull his pants and underwear down in one go and his cock springs free; thick, tip red and leaking and just beautiful. You never thought you would say that about a man’s dick but it just made sense, it matched the rest of his body.

“Shh, shh, here- open up,” he ruts forward and rubs his length against your cheek and your eyes flutter closed. He taps the head of his cock against your lips and you oblige, letting him enter your warm and waiting mouth. He felt warm and heavy on your tongue, the velvety skin sliding in and out as you bob your head on his length. “Fuck, baby, feels s’good,” he moans, looking down at you in awe. This is definitely not what he expected to happen tonight. You hum around him at the sweet praise, swallowing every bit of precum he gives you. You take a deep breath through your nose before you take him deeper, surpressing a gag as his tip hits the back of your throat, your nose pressing against his dark hair.

The groans leaving his lips make you woozy, forgetting everything in that moment as all you want to do is make him feel good. You look up at him with tears brimming your lash line, and what a view, you thought. His hair was disheveled, his sweat sheened skin flushed pink, his brows furrowed in concentration as he tries not to spill down your throat.

You lift off and wrap your hand around him, slick with your spit as you stroke him. You touch his balls with your other hand, massaging them at the same time. “Perfect girl,” he coos at you, admiring your fucked out face and heaving chest. “I want you,” you sigh, eyes wide and innocent as you look up at him.

“Want me to fuck you? Yeah? How do you want me?” You turn around to bend over and rest your arms on the sink, grinding your ass against him with a sway of your hips. You can see him admiring you in the mirror, running his finger through your wetness. You shudder at the feeling, being so vulnerable for what was essentially a complete stranger; but you felt safe with him.

Matty reaches down into his pocket for his wallet, pulling out a shiny condom package.

“Wait, I-“ you pause. “I’m on the pill, in case you just want to,-“

Matty lets out a deep sigh, the thought of being inside of you and feeling you making his heart beat out of his chest. “Yeah, ok sweet girl.” His voice is soft, bent over and breathing in your ear, searching your eyes in your reflection for confirmation.

“Please,” you breathe, every ounce of shame has vanished from your body at this point. All you could focus on was feeling him inside of you, all of him.

“Please, please fuck me, I need it” you babble mindlessly. Matty runs his tip along your folds, nudging against your aching clit and finally starts to push in. The stretch was all consuming; pain mixed with pleasure that seemed to separate your mind from your body. You held onto the sink like your life depended on it, the only thing keeping you from floating away.

“That’s it,” Matty praises as he pushes in more, all the way until you’re completely enveloping him. “Perfect fit, you feel so fucking good wrapped around me” he whispers, hands running along the curve of your ass as he grabs a handful of flesh, kneading it. “Fuck, Matty,”

“You’ve got to stay quiet, yeah?” You nod your head, mouth hanging open as he fucks into you. Matty stills inside of you, a loud burst of laughter from downstairs reminds you exactly what you were doing.

He pulls out of you and you whine at the loss. “Matty, what-“ you see him stand back up with his black tie in his hand. “I can’t have you moaning and groaning, sweetheart,” he states plainly, crumpling the fabric into a ball. “Here, it’s for your own good,” he holds it up to your lips and you open. He shoves his tie into your mouth and you groan, now muffled by the fabric. Your eyes are wide as you nod at him, breathing through your nose.

He lines himself up and pushes all the way in with sharp thrust, you clench around him as he starts to move, his fingers digging into your hips. “Don’t think your little boyfriend would like this, would he?” He spits, venom dripping from his tongue. “Little slut needed a real man to rail her in the bathroom at his family Christmas party, god you’re fucking filthy,” he groans on and you’re rendered speechless; half from the tie in your mouth and half from his dirty words and his cock hitting that spot deep inside of you. Normally his inflated ego would turn you off, but something about it coming from him just spurred you on even more. Unlike most men you’ve been with, he was able to back it all up. You nod feverishly at him, admiring his reflection in the mirror, cheeks and chest flushed pink and pupils blown wide with lust.

Matty leans forward, his chest to your back and brings his fingers to your clit, rubbing mind numbing circles over your swollen bud as he continues to split you in half with his relentless thrusts, hips slamming into you. You can’t hold back your moan, your cunt clenching tightly around his cock. “You like that?” Matty asks, already knowing the answer as your eyes cross from pleasure, pressure building in your lower belly with every stroke of his fingers. The fabric in your mouth was all but dripping down your chin, not doing much now to quiet the noises he was drawing out of you.

“You gonna cum around my cock, darling? C’mon, milk me with this tight little cunt, that’s right,” he grunts into your ear and that’s what throws you over the edge completely; white hot pleasure consuming you, vision blurry as your mind goes completely blank, waves of euphoria pulsing through your body. “Fuck, you feel so good,” Matty grunts, face crumpled and pained as he swiftly pulls out of you to stroke himself, abs tense he cums all over your ass, white ropes painting your soft skin. You arch your back and push up into him, him squeezing the remnants of his orgasm out, slapping his softening dick against your cunt.

You spit out his tie, the sopping fabric landing in the porcelain sink. “Oh my fucking god,” you breathe, trying your best to not collapse into the floor, your body completely drained. “You’re unreal.” Matty is looking at you, his lips curling into a soft smile and you feel a pang in your stomach. Was it guilt, or something else?

“Here, let me clean you up,” Matty says, pulling up his pants and putting himself away. You watch as he grabs a hand towel from the closet and runs it under warm water. Ryan never did this for you, you thought.

“How are we going to get out of this, exactly?” You ask, somewhat rhetorically. Matty just chuckles, wiping the warm towel over your bottom. “Stop doing all that thinking, darling. I hate it when you do that,” he says playfully, pulling your skirt back down. You stand back up straight, all of a sudden feeling insecure just standing with your tits hanging out. He hands you your bra and sweater.

“Relax, bet he didn’t even notice we’ve been gone,” he says confidently, but you weren’t so sure. You had no idea how long it had actually been.

“I think I should just leave, I’ll tell him I’m not feeling good. I’ll get an Uber home.” You tell Matty. It was true, you really weren’t feeling super great about what you’d just done. But you couldn’t find it in yourself to regret it, because it really was just that good.

“How about this,” Matty says, digging his car keys out of his pocket. “Take these, go out the side door and wait for me in my car. I’ll say my goodbyes downstairs and I can drive you home. Trust me, Ryan’s got to be so piss drunk by now he won’t even realize. He’s always like this at family gatherings.”

”Ok, yeah, sure. Thanks,” you grab his keys from him, he grabs your wrist and pulls you close. “Least I could do, love” he says before he takes your head in his hand and kisses you gently, butterflies swirling in your stomach at his tenderness. A far cry from the way he was fucking you just 5 minutes ago.

“I told you, stop calling me that unless you want me to fall in love with you, Matty,” you exasperate, pulling your boots back on.

“Maybe I do.”

[axylotls]

⌕ s͟e͟a͟r͟c͟h͟i͟n͟g axyl's pg . .

zᶻ ( MAIN DRS ) ⨟ ♡

my main drs refer to the drs i'm most focused on scripting and the ones i'll mostly be posting about (this will be updated over time as i get hyperfixated on drs!!) — if you're curious about which dr i'm planning on shifting to first, that would be my 'rocky beach house' waiting room which you'll find listed below

୨ৎ ˚ ﹒⠀ girlnextdoor [ own gg ] ⠷

boynextdoor's sister group except not sister cause most of the members are dating each other... one of my many own girl group drs however it is by far my favourite not only because of our adorable concept, but also the overall vibes of the dr are superb compared to any other ^O^

୨ৎ ˚ ﹒⠀ zerobaseone [ haobin vers. ] ⠷

this is my first zb1 dr so she's very dear to me 😓 i put my heart and soul into this script and i think about this dr at least 20 times per day!!!!! haoxybin the most iconic poly couple we are so in love and i love them so much

୨ৎ ˚ ﹒⠀ boynextdoor ⠷

one of my favourite male drs >_< there isn't much to say about this dr other than i love it very much. the angst from my relationship with jaehyun reflects my cr a lot so sometimes it's a bit bittersweet talking about this dr, but i love it so much either way and i cannot wait to live out my life here

୨ৎ ˚ ﹒⠀ zerobaseone [ gunwook vers. ] ⠷

nobody loves gunwook more than me!!! (i'm looking at you seok matthew) this dr is free from any angst at all despite me being a bit of an oblivious dummy but that's nothing.. also pre-debut i was a prodigy so my iq is like 189 'cause i'm just that cool and awesome except im an actual dumbass when it comes to love 'cause tell me why i don't know gunwook is crushing on me despite confessing to my face multiple times throughout idol planet??

zᶻ ( FAVE DRS ) ⨟ ♡

listed below are some of my favourite and most special drs, but they don't quite make the cut for being my main dr as i'm focusing on other things at the moment. they're still very dear to me and definitely in my list of priorities of places i want to shift to first, though!!!

୨ৎ ˚ ﹒⠀ enhypen [ multiple vers. ] ⠷

if you know me, you know i love enhypen!!! i currently have five different enha drs which includes my main eighth member dr, my 7th member dr where i scripted out jay cause i date someone else (that man can't exist if he's not dating me!!!), another 7th member dr but i'm a Man, my femhypen aka genderbent enhypen dr, as well as my 12th member dr where it's actually a co-ed group

୨ৎ ˚ ﹒⠀ aespa [ multiple vers. ] ⠷

aespa is one of my ult ggs that i love so much :] i have a fifth member dr where i date karina and a fourth member dr where i replace karina lol yes i'm crazy psycho and can't see my s/os date other people so i script them out altogether!!!

୨ৎ ˚ ﹒⠀ zerobaseone [ multiple vers. ] ⠷

as i've mentioned before i have MANY zb1 drs im talking 20+ and i can't even give you an exact number because i add and remove zb1 drs basically on the daily these days... the ones that are staying for sure (which are separated by who i'm dating—and not including the two that are my main drs) are: jiwoong dr, hao dr, hanbin dr, matthew dr, taerae dr, ricky dr, gyuvin dr, ot8 (w/o yujin) poly dr, mattparkz dr, shimkongz dr, myung jaehyun dr, woonhak dr, and karina dr

୨ৎ ˚ ﹒⠀ stray kids [ multiple vers. ] ⠷

stray kids was my ult group for the longest time and although i don't stan them as hard as i used to, they'll always be some of my favourite people which is why i adore my two skz drs with all my heart! my main (and first ever non-own grp kpop dr) skz dr is my minho dr and my most recent one is my minsung dr :] no i don't ship them irl but yes i date both of them!!!! we exist!!! also btw i'm a guy in both of these drs ^O^

୨ৎ ˚ ﹒⠀ atlantis [ own bg ] ⠷

this was my first male dr that i made back when i thought i was cis... dark times! however its one of my faves and has a very detailed survival show (that definitely needs to be updated) that i will for sure talk about at some point in time lol i love my members in this dr so much

୨ৎ ˚ ﹒⠀ eclipse [ own gg ] ⠷

this was my first ever k-pop dr which i made before even knowing k-pop drs were actually very common in the shifting community (i learned shifting on instagram and i wasn't really a part of the community until i joined tiktok about six months after learning about it) anyway i love my eclipse girlies and one of the main reasons i made this dr was to have a co-ed kingdom/queendom show where the winners would be named the kings and queens of kpop (obviously eclipse wins!!)

zᶻ ( OTHER DRS ) ⨟ ♡

below are all my other drs!! note that i have so many drs and many of them have multiple versions (for example i have "canon" drs and some that feature idols instead of the original characters; other drs i just have multiple to experience different lives or have different s/os lol) so this technically isn't every single one of my drs, but every single universe that i will shift to. they say to dream big and i do!!!!

୨ৎ ˚ ﹒⠀ k-pop [ & fame drs ] ⠷

day6. (g)i-dle. itzy. ive. le sserafim. loona. newjeans. p1harmony. the rose. triples. txt. xdinary heroes. 3racha. multiple own grp + soloist drs. actor/actress. author. backup dancer. bake-off reality show. band. basketball player. boysworld. chicken shop date. director. katseye. little mix. mcyt. nepo baby. one direction. rapper. reality show. sugar baby. tennis player. vlogger.

୨ৎ ˚ ﹒⠀ mlb + marvel [ & hogwarts drs ] ⠷

agatha all along. black widow. general mcu. marvel w/ idols. mlb hero. mlb villain. mlb academy. mlb w/ idols. mlb x marvel. beauxbatons. canadian wizarding school. golden trio. hogwarts w/ idols. marauders. marauders w/idols. modern golden trio.

୨ৎ ˚ ﹒⠀ tv show [ & movie drs ] ⠷

alice in borderland. alice in wonderland. a.n.t. farm. arcane. austin & ally. baby. the babysitters club. batfam. bella & the bulldogs. best friends whenever. big hero six. bikini bottom. boynextdoor next door. business proposal. camp half blood. criminal minds. descendants. the devil wears prada. diamond castle. enhypen next door. ever after high. everything sucks. fairy secret. fashion fairytale. the fosters. gilmore girls. good luck charlie. the good place. gravity falls. hannah montana. her private life. hometown cha cha cha. how to train your dragon. the hunger games. inside out. island princess. jessie. jumanji. k-12 (i don't support melanie!!). kc undercover. lab rats. lemonade mouth. little women. maleficent. mean girls. my demon. narnia. neverland. one day at a time. outerbanks. part time idol. pitch perfect. pokémon. power rangers. princess & the popstar. princess charm school. princess diaries. princess switch. sam & cat. the school for good and evil. shake it up. shameless. shrek. sky high. spiderverse. spirited. squid game. starstruck. start up. study group. the suite life series. the summer i turned pretty. summer strike. teen beach movie. the thundermans. to all the boys i've loved before. tomorrowland. totally spies. twinkling watermelon. victorious. wednesday. wicked. wizards of waverly place. wreck it ralph. yellowjackets. zb1 next door.

୨ৎ ˚ ﹒⠀ book [ fanfic drs ] ⠷

chanwitch. dark moon. dollhouse. folk of the air series. geronimo stilton. heartless. hideout. i hope this doesn't find you. if you could see the sun. kitten. the lunar chronicles series. paragon academy of aces. renegades series. say please. shatter me series. the tale of geoji & jinsil. this time it's real. you don't have a shot.

୨ৎ ˚ ﹒⠀ miscellaneous [ other drs ] ⠷

ancient royalty. better cr. boarding school. children of the planets. christmas wonderland. college life. concert experience. cottage witch. cupid. double life. dragon rider academy. eternal childhood. eternal summer. fantasy. five nights at freddy's. futuristic academy. ghost hunter. idol school. intergalactic royalty. jeu imaginaire. medieval royalty. minecraft. modern royalty. pirate life. post apocalyptic. porn star. small town. spy academy. street racer. supernatural school. supernatural idol school. teacher. waiting room. women-only paradise.

[ceaselesswatchersspecialboy]

enamored with the bill possessing Ford's body au. If you would feel up to it, do you have more tidbits? :3

I’m happy to see so many people enjoying it!! I have a lot of additional tidbits so I’ll just stick to giving a few for now:

— Dipper finds out Ford is the author a lot earlier, for the obvious reasons of Bill being present in Ford’s body. He doesn’t put the pieces together right away, only because initially, he hates Bill, disappointed that the ‘scientist’ his parents spoke about that he wanted to impress turned out to be nothing like what he had hoped, ignoring and dismissing him instead, even taking a liking to Mabel before him! He has this idealised version of the author in his head, someone who he relates to and finds comfort in, and he doesn’t want to taint that vision by suspecting it may be someone who he hates. He may be a mystery lover but he is still a twelve year old with a grudge.

It’s only after he and Bill start getting along that he brings it up, and Bill doesn’t think to lie. He’s just that surprised Dipper found it. He does lie about not remembering things though to avoid Dipper’s questions about the paranoia and why he hid it — as on the spot kind of thing, and that becomes Dipper’s mystery fixation of the summer.

— Stan and Bill have various nicknames for each other, with Bill’s main one for Stan being ‘Fez’, and Stan’s main one for Bill being ‘Goldie’.

— Speaking of them, when it comes to their relationship, they are genuinely friends after thirty years of living together, but what that friendship entails is where it gets complicated and I don’t think I can summarise here. I’d say it can best be described as two people who have come to understand each other very deeply, and are similar in a thousand ways, but they would rather throw themselves off a cliff than acknowledge or talk about that. There’s also the lingering anger and resentment on Stan’s end, not for taking Ford’s body, he knows Bill doesn’t want to be stuck here either, but for what he did to Ford before that, how he hurt him. He, much to his confusion, does care about Bill, and Bill, much to his own confusion as well, does care about Stan back, but their friendship is built on something awful, and that doesn’t just go away.

— On a sillier note, it was in 1990 that Stan realised Bill was his only friend and that he sort of enjoyed his company, and that truly was a horrifying moment. On the other end Bill finally admits to some degree he might care for Stan in 1994, which happens while both of them are drunk, and Bill likes to claim it didn’t happen. The image below also probably summarises the lighter aspect of their dynamic better than I could word it here:

— Bill has taxidermy as a hobby and actually gives Dipper and Mabel a few lessons in it, creating some displays for the shack. Weirdly good bonding activity.

— Very specific ‘episode’ idea in my mind where Stan and Bill get framed by Faires that Bill angered a thousand years ago for a crime they didn’t commit, and Dipper and Mabel have to figure out how to prove their innocence, finding more about their Grunkles along the way, and also having to beat a fairy in a game of poker.

— Mabel at some point comes to the conclusion her “Grunkle Ford” had a bad breakup that he still hasn’t gotten over and makes it her goal to help him through it. This is part of her summer mission. It comes up frequently. It’s ridiculous I know but what is Gravity Falls without a generous amount of both angst and utter silliness.

I’ll probably leave it at that for now! But if you’d want more or have any specific questions, I shall do my best. I’m still figuring out some stuff too so input will be helpful.

[tinfoil-jones]

Jerk Ford AU: The Worst Timeline

Out of all the scenarios and alternate timelines / other AU's this one could cross over into or adopt elements from (You can see a Reverse Portal Scenario Here and Here), the worst and most destructive alternate timeline for Jerk Ford would be Drifting Stars.

If you don't know, Drifting Stars is a popular AU where during the events of Not What He Seems, Mabel goes through the portal instead of Ford coming out. And now Mabel and Ford are together in the multiverse.

Stanley never stopped being involved with family because he was never kicked out, so Mabel and Dipper have actually known their Grunkle Stan their whole lives, they've even visited him a fair few times and stayed over, the summer that the events of the show takes place in is just the first time they stayed for an entire summer.

Imagine if, about five years before the show starts, little 7-8 year old Mabel falls into the bottomless pit and somehow gets ejected to the only other thing out in the multiverse with the same dimensional signature as her; Jerk Ford, her great uncle who has been missing for twenty five years.

Jerk Ford sees this crying little kid and he takes pause because, for one thing what is a kid doing in Mystery Flesh Pit National Park in the Body Horror Dimension, and another thing why does she have an eerie resemblance to his nephew, who was only ten years old the last time that he saw him?

Jerk Ford at first was considering leaving her to the lost and found at the tourist outpost of the national park, but then she called him "Grunkle Stan." (Because she is mistaking him for Stanley, and Grunkle why did you cut your hair?) And it's all over.

Jerk Ford, a multidimensional space hobo vagabond who has been trying to get home for the past twenty five years at this point and has had absolutely no contact with his family for obvious reasons, he just goes YOINK THIS IS MINE NOW.

And why is this the worst timeline for the Jerk Ford AU?

You know that scene in the Lion King when Rafiki is holding up Simba to the valley? Well, imagine Jerk Ford doing the same thing with Mabel. Except she's like this:

Because Jerk Ford already has poor impulse control when it comes to pettiness without his brother to reign him in, and now he has Mabel who is a very similar brand of unhinged as he is, they're just subjecting the entire multiverse to a path of glittery destruction the likes have which have never been seen before and will hopefully never be repeated.

Jerk Ford was already wilding all on his own now he has Mabel who has so many ideas. And she has this pathetic, lonely man wrapped around her little finger.

Also, Jerk Ford is a known runner. He does not fight if he doesn't see himself winning, and he'll usually go out of his way to not kill people. He just lacks the trigger-happy 'shoot now journal about it later'-gene that most Fords have. (He has very specific exceptions)*

But in a scenario where he has Mabel? Where he isn't facing consequences all by himself? He isn't letting anything in the multiverse so much as breathe rudely in her direction. So now, he isn't just some jerk or mostly harmless nuisance, he is stacking bodies (not in Mabel's line of sight, obviously).

The (Jerk) Ford Hate Club is besides themselves. Now, stopping or killing Jerk Ford isn't their only prerogative, they also need to 'rescue' this small, innocent child from The Worst Ford and his influence. Unaware that the terrible-flavoured beanboozled jellybeans that keep making their way into their catering were all her idea.

When Jerk Ford and Mabel return in 2012, Dipper is besides himself because, sweet Moses his sister is alive! She's really alive!

But she's been with with The Author who he hates, and being raised by him for the past five years has had obvious effects on her development.

She's still happy go lucky and nice, she's not a jerk at all like her Grunkle Ford.

But she's basically a supervillain who is on the FBI's Most Wanted List in every dimension she's been to that has one, and some organizations both official and criminal consider her a bigger threat than Jerk Ford (relative to body size).

Her sunny disposition did not change at all; she's blowing up whole buildings with a damn smile on her face

It's terrifying. This is the worst Jerk Ford timeline.

*While he was in the multiverse, instead of celebrating Jewish holidays the traditional way there was no point without his family, he would travel to different parallel Earth dimensions to kill Nazi’s. He would try to be a little more traditional, and halt the killing spree while he had Mabel with him, she was too young for murder.