#who is directly paid by the insurance and has any kind of space on their waiting list :)

[aromanticbastards]

the process of getting therapy that my insurance pays for is stupid enough that i want to kill every single fucking person involved in designing this process

(suicide mention tw for the tags i didn't get to put that as the first tag so now it's here)

[bronanlynch]

a million years later I’m done with aa3 and once again ranking lawyers by how much I would want to be their file clerk. there are so many lawyers in this one holy shit

phoenix: his office manager is a nineteen year old with very little management experience which is kind of a red flag. on the other hand at least he has an office manager so I wouldn’t be dealing with his nonsense alone. and he does clean the toilet without having to be nagged abt it which is the kind of thing I look for in any man that I’m going to be sharing any kind of space with for any extended length of time. 8/10, loses points because of his light caseload

mia (flashback era): I’d prob be technically working for the whole firm, not just her specifically, which means I’d at least be at an established business who knows how to set up health insurance for their employees. and she seems like she would be nice to her assistants even when she’s horrifically stressed so, and would properly appreciate how nice and neat her files are. 9/10, loses a point bc she had that big gap between cases and I’d have to deal w her coworkers

goldberg: again, love to work at a nice stable firm. he seems a bit obnoxious to deal with all the time but mostly wouldn’t speak to me except to ask me to mail letters or tell me awkward stories if we were in the kitchen at the same time which is like. tolerably annoying boss behavior. also he has a receptionist, and I love to gossip with receptionists. 7/10, talk to me abt your PTO policy and we’ll see

diego armando: I do not care for the way he talks to women and if I had to work directly with him I would request for that not to be the case pretty much immediately. no I don’t care that he and mia were dating, don’t condescendingly call your much younger female coworker “kitten.” 5/10, still might put up with him for the stable income (see above)

payne: again, I’m allergic to older men condescending to me. I mean, I’m allergic to all men condescending to me but there’s a specific flavor of rage that fills me when he calls mia “little girl” in court and I’m not working for men who would talk to me like that thank you very much. 2/10, maybe if I were really desperate

godot: being dead didn’t improve the misogyny and also my entire job would consist of getting him more coffee. I think I would snap and poison him myself. 0/10, he barely takes cases so what would even be the point

edgeworth (flashback era): god he was such a little shit (affectionate) and I would not want to be anywhere near him. absolutely the kind of smug bastard who tries to tell me I made a formatting error on the document I typed up for him and won’t listen when I try to explain that both ways are actually correct and it’s entirely a matter of taste. 3/10, no thank you

edgeworth (defense attorney era): actively having several different crises over phoenix being in the hospital and briefly following in his father’s footsteps and also probably jetlagged as hell which would not make him a great boss and probably would snap at me more than I would prefer however I would love to have a front row seat to his gay drama and honestly, being competent and fairly organized and not actively cruel or sexist goes a long way imo. unfortunately a very short term temp gig so no benefits or long-term job security. 8/10, for once I don’t have to deduct points for him being a prosecutor

franziska: has maybe chilled out a little tiny bit and grown as a person since last game. however. would still prefer not to be in danger of getting hit with a whip by my boss, and don’t love the concept of working for someone with such unforgiving standards of perfectionism. I already expect that from myself, I don’t need my boss reinforcing it. on the other hand, if she paid my travel expenses I might consider it. 5/10, still losing points for being a prosecutor and also a teenager

(aa1 | aa2)

[xjoonchildx]

guarded | jhs x reader | chapter six: no one but you

summary: you’ve tried to separate yourself from your infamous crime family, but a new case has your carefully-constructed world crashing down around you.  now you have to figure out how to heal old wounds and handle the new man who enters your orbit.

pairing: hoseok x reader

genre: mafia AU, E2L, slow burn, tsundere, smut

rating: 18+

word count: 5.6K

A/N: i sincerely hope you guys like the way this ends, it’s always so nerve-wracking to end a story! the epilogue to this story is posted as well and linked.  thank you to every single person who sent sweet messages of support it means the world to me.  SMUT WARNINGS APPLY IN THIS CHAPTER: oral (m/f), unprotected sex (only in fiction y’all) and hoseok thirst.

of course, i cannot post this story without shouting out some of the most supportive, killer people on this site.  you guys truly mean the world to me @ladyartemesia​ @ppersonna​ @taetaewonderland​ @hobi-gif​

Chapter 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 | EPILOGUE

*********************

There are perks to being the boss.

For Namjoon, it means calling the shots on the streets from his office in the sky.  Rarely does he leave the climate-controlled comfort of his pristine headquarters to get his hands dirty in the day-to-day business of the organization he runs.

Tonight, he’s making an exception.

Yoongi drives. Like a bat out of hell, as always.

It’s a thirty-minute ride from downtown Seoul to Incheon Port without traffic but Yoongi is on pace to finish it in just twenty.  Hoseok watches the lights on the expressway speed by from the backseat.  He tries hard to focus on the information Namjoon shares, the details he’ll need in order to ensure he doesn’t put himself or anyone else in danger tonight.  

But fuck, it’s so hard to concentrate with the taste of you still on his lips.  

He scrubs a hand down his face and takes a deep breath.  He forces himself to push the memory of your body in his hands and your skin in his mouth and your voice in his ear to the corner of his mind.  

Then he goes over the information again.

Namjoon wants to be in place at least ten minutes before the scheduled meet so he can figure out what’s going on before the Ssijog knows he’s there with his men.  

He wants guns to stay holstered unless he gives the signal.

He wants --

“You must have really scared the shit out of that guy, Jung,” Namjoon murmurs from the front seat.  Hoseok snaps back into focus to search for his boss’s reflection in the side mirror and finds Namjoon already looking at him. “He’s been blowing up his contact since last night, begging for personal protection.”

“He’s lucky I didn’t do worse,” Hoseok shrugs.  “I certainly could have.”

“Oh, of that I have no doubt,” Namjoon agrees.  “Someday you’ll have to tell me the story of how you managed to be outside of his apartment when his handler picked him up.  Here I was, under the impression you had the night off.”

Hoseok swallows thickly.

“Just doing my job.”

There’s a twist to Namjoon’s mouth that Hoseok can’t read and it puts him on edge.  

“Well, I must thank you for your dedication to your job,” Namjoon continues. “You’ve really gone above and beyond the call of duty for this assignment.”

Hoseok looks away from the mirror.  “Yeah, sure,” he says quietly.  

The car falls into an uncomfortable silence.

Yoongi clears his throat.  

“So anyway --” he announces loudly, “-- Jimin and Tae were able to track Kang’s texts through some internet bullshit they mess around with. Apparently dude flipped out after you left his place and wouldn’t let up until his handlers agreed to meet him tonight.”

“At Incheon Port?” Hoseok asks, glad for the redirect.  “That’s a hell of a drive for a chat.”

“My thoughts exactly,” Namjoon says under his breath.  

The car falls silent once again.

**********************

Mun Kiwoo has a reputation for being messy.

The man at the top sets the tone for the organization, and Mun is no exception.  His men are known for their brutality, his deals often go south, and by most accounts his syndicate is hanging on by a thread.

But it’s still hanging on.

Namjoon, Hoseok, and Yoongi watch quietly from their vantage point behind a shipping container as Mun waits in the dark, cigarette in hand. He looks like an unmade bed -- shirt rumpled and half-tucked into his wrinkled dress pants.  He lights one cigarette off of another as he answers a series of calls on his cell.  

His agitation seems to rise each time it rings again.

Hoseok takes stock of the two guards Mun has at his side tonight.  They’re bulky men with huge arms and round bodies -- the kind of guys who look dangerous due to sheer size, but would be slow to respond in a physical fight.  Namjoon holds up two fingers to confirm they’re the only men with Mun and Hoseok nods.

Headlights bounce off the pavement after a few more minutes of waiting.

A black car pulls up close to the water’s edge and Mun Kiwoo ends his call just as he lights another cigarette.  

Kang Donghyuk is the first out of the car, followed closely by his Ssijog handler.  Kang is dragging his ass and even from a distance, Hoseok can make out the bandage over the side of his face.

Hope it hurts, motherfucker.

“Mr. Kang,” Mun Kiwoo’s voice is clear now, loud enough for all three men to hear.  “You have been rather insistent about this meeting. I’m a busy guy.  What do you want?”

All three men strain to listen to Donghyuk’s response, but it’s too muffled to catch.  Yoongi brings his hands to his throat to make a choking gesture.  Can’t hear shit, he mouths.  You choked him too hard.

Hoseok rolls his eyes.

“That sounds like your problem,” Mun laughs in response to whatever Kang has said.  “Not mine.”

Donghyuk gestures wildly as he tries to make his case, likely pleading for the protection of the Ssijog.   Mun Kiwoo looks unmoved.

“I’m not interested in causing any more trouble with the Gajog, Mr. Kang.  This entire situation has been a means to an end.  Stirring more shit with Kim Namjoon is not in my best interest.”

Namjoon signals to Yoongi and Hoseok that it’s time to move.  All three men step out from their cover behind the shipping container, hands in front of their bodies to demonstrate none are holding their weapons.

“Fucking hell,” Mun Kiwoo groans when he spots them.  “I don’t have time for this shit.”

His guards bow up at his side, both men reaching for their guns.  Mun has the good sense to raise a hand and stop them from pulling their firearms -- which keeps Yoongi and Hoseok from doing the same.  All of the men face off in silence for a moment, each side waiting to see if the other will do something to break the fragile peace.

Kang Donghyuk whines under his breath and Hoseok shoots a warning glare at him.  He drops his gaze to the ground and shuts his mouth.

“You say you don’t want trouble with me, Mun and yet --” Namjoon snarls, “-- you have this piece of shit working my sister. Explain.”

“You know how these rich boys are, Kim,” Mun chuckles.  “They develop a bad habit -- or in this idiot’s case, two -- and daddy’s money isn’t enough anymore.  They’re easy to buy.”

Donghyuk looks from Namjoon to Mun, panic in his wide eyes.

“They’re trying to kill me,” he rasps.

“So what?” Mun laughs.  He smiles wide to reveal a mouth like an abandoned graveyard, teeth broken and scattered.  “This guy thinks we’re friends,” he jeers, jerking a thumb in Donghyuk’s direction.  “He’s too stupid to figure out that he served a purpose and now he doesn’t anymore.  Simple as that.”  

Namjoon sucks in a breath with obvious irritation.

“I’m still waiting to hear what any of this shit has to do with my sister.”

“Ah, yes,” Mun says, stubbing out his cigarette and getting back to the task at hand. “Listen, I don’t have anything against your sister personally, okay? Lim Joowon is my son and I want him back.  He can’t spend the next 15 years behind bars. You understand that, right? Doing whatever it takes for your family?”

Namjoon utters a curse under his breath.

“I’ll give your sister some credit, though -- she’s tenacious.  I thought she’d give up after we took her digital files,” Mun admits.  “Instead she’s cost me a hell of a lot more money.  I’ve had to start cutting a lot more checks to ensure this shit goes away.”

“She’s not the type to roll over and play dead, Mun,” Namjoon growls through gritted teeth.  

“The pigheaded gene runs in the family, huh?” Mun grins. “Look, let me level with you Kim, man to man.  I don’t even need your sister at this point. I’ve paid enough people to fuck this case from the inside out.  But I won’t lie, she is my insurance.  If any of the higher-ups start asking questions about why this case fell apart -- who better to point the finger at than the sweet young prosecutor with the dirty family connections, hmm?”

Namjoon tenses, hand reaching for the gun at his side.  Yoongi stops him with a muttered warning.

“None of us give a fuck about what happens to your son, Mun,” Namjoon says. “What I have a problem with is you sending that piece of shit --” he points at the trembling Kang Donghyuk, “ -- into her fucking home. Invading her space.  You crossed a line.”

“You’re right,” Mun agrees lightly.  “It was rude. Uncalled for.  I’m gonna apologize for it right now.”

He pulls his pistol from his side and the sound of clinking metal bounces off the shipping containers as everyone pulls their guns.  Hoseok trains his pistol directly at the shaking Kang Donghyuk and silently prays for the chance to pull the trigger. Mun Kiwoo’s gun is pointed at Namjoon and Namjoon’s is pointed right back.

Then Mun’s face lights up with a bizarre smile. He swings the point of his pistol in the direction of Donghyuk and pulls the trigger twice.

Donghyuk sputters as he falls to the floor.

Hoseok and Yoongi exchange looks.  

Namjoon stares at Mun incredulously.

“What?” Mun’s nonchalance is comical.  “You wanted to do that too, right?  Besides, that guy owes everyone in the city money. I promise you, his own mother won’t even miss him.”

“Jesus,” Yoongi mutters under his breath. “This guy is fucking nuts.”

Mun puts his pistol away and his men follow suit.  Namjoon signals for Yoongi and Hoseok to do the same.  

“Consider that a goodwill gesture,” Mun says breezily.  “An official apology from me, to you.  And please pass along my consideration to your sister.  Please assure her that none of this is personal.  But I will make sure my son stays out of prison.  And like it or not, she’s going to play some kind of role in that.”

Namjoon stares off into the water.

“I can’t control my sister, Mun.  She makes her own choices,” he says after a moment.  “But let me be clear, this is the first and last polite discourse we’re going to have about this situation.  I don’t want you, your goons or any --” he glances at the bleeding pile of Kang Donghyuk on the floor, “-- paid help going near her.  Not in her office, not in her home. Nowhere. Are we clear?”

Mun Kiwoo lights another cigarette and smiles wide, the space in his teeth prominent against the gleaming ember hanging from his mouth.  

“Crystal.”

On the way back to the car, Hoseok hears the heavy splash of Kang Donghyuk’s body hitting the water down below.

He shuts his eyes against the rush of pleasure he feels as he climbs into the backseat.

************************

YOU

Something isn’t right.

You stare at the empty seat across the conference table -- the one where Hyejin normally sits -- and something twists in your gut.  She’s out sick today.  You can’t even remember the last time she took a sick day.

All morning, you’ve tried to convince yourself that it’s no big deal.  That you’re working yourself up for nothing.

But Donghyuk is out today, too.  

Vaguely, you register the sound of your boss’s voice at the front of the room. Any minute now, you’ll be asked to brief the team on the status of your case, but you can’t think straight.  You can’t focus on anything but the feeling in the pit of your stomach that something is wrong.  

Your thoughts race back to last night, back to your brother taking his men away for business in the middle of the night.

Back to Hoseok.

You try not to think about what it felt like to have his warm body pressed against yours. The way he smelled like fresh laundry and spice. The way you unraveled the moment he touched you.  

Your phone pulses with an incoming text.

namjoon: i’ve asked jungkook to bring you to the office tonight after work [ 1:25 PM ]

namjoon: a lot to discuss [ 1:26 PM ]

Your brain grinds to a halt as you stare at the messages.

It’s like everything is wrong and everything is right, all at the same time.

“Miss. Kim?”

You look up to see your boss staring at you, one expectant eyebrow raised.  You take a deep breath, line up your papers and stand to take your place at the front of the room.

****************************

The sense of déjà vu that hits you as you make the long walk across your brother’s office is nearly overwhelming.  This is exactly how this entire mess began weeks ago -- with you summoned to see Namjoon after hours, with Yoongi and Hoseok flanking him on either side.

But there is one thing different about tonight.

When you briefly lock gazes with Hoseok as you make your way to Namjoon’s plush chair, there is a warmth behind his dark eyes you can see from a distance. It’s a complete contrast to the first time you ever saw him, when you thought you could freeze to death from the ice in his glare.

You look away before anyone can catch the flush working its way up your neck.

“Thank you for coming tonight,” you brother begins evenly.  “I finally have some answers for you about what’s going on.”

“Well, I’m ready to hear them,” you exhale, taking a seat.  Your eyes drift over the papers strewn scattered across his desk.  

“We’ve learned that the reason the Ssijog want your case against Lim Joowon to fold is because Lim is Mun Kiwoo’s son.”

You raise a brow.

“That’s news to me.  I didn’t even know Mun Kiwoo had a son.”

“Neither did we,” Namjoon admits.  “Apparently this is his only son and the man he intends to pass control of the Ssijog down to.  So it makes sense that he’s so hell-bent on seeing this case fall apart.”

He picks one of the papers off his desk.

“This is the more problematic piece of the puzzle,” Namjoon says quietly.  Your chest tightens in response to the expression on his face. “Jimin and Taehyung tracked a Ssijog account making payouts.  Payouts to people in your office.”

He holds the piece of paper out to you.

“There are six names on that list.”

You take a deep breath before taking the sheet from his hands.  

Your eyes scan down the document, taking in the blows, one by one.  Two receptionists.  One paralegal.  

Lee Hyejin.  

Kang Donghyuk.  

Park Soo.

You say nothing as you stare at the list, taking in the names again.

Someone you called a friend.  Someone you’d allowed into your bed.  The boss you’d bent over backwards trying to impress.  You stare at the black-and-white evidence of betrayal in your hands, reading the words over and over -- expecting to feel sadness or rage or humiliation or something.  

Nothing comes.

“Give us a moment, would you please?”

Yoongi and Hoseok file out of the room quietly at Namjoon’s command.  The second the heavy door to the office clicks shut, he clears his throat.  “There is something else we need to discuss, Amsaja,” your brother continues quietly.  “Kang Donghyuk is dead.”

“Good.”

Namjoon’s eyes go wide at the quick, calm delivery of your response.

You stand to walk to his sideboard to pour a drink.  You have no idea what’s inside the decanter, only that whatever it is promises a burn you want to feel right now. You pour a glass and take a sip, leaning against the heavy wooden piece.

“Did you kill him?”

“No. The Ssijog beat us to it,” Namjoon admits.  “But Hoseok paid Donghyuk a personal visit at home to convey our -- displeasure -- at his involvement in this mess. He damned near choked that man to death hours before Mun Kiwoo put two bullets in him.”

“I’m sorry anyone has ever tried you because I promise you they are going to pay.”

The words Hoseok spoke in your kitchen surface in your mind.  

They’d sent a bolt of pleasure through you at the time -- triggering a kind of primitive response you’d be embarrassed to admit out loud.

And somehow that response pales in comparison to what you’re feeling right now.

A normal woman wouldn’t find satisfaction in the idea of Donghyuk cowering in fear inside his apartment.  A normal woman wouldn’t feel warmth spread through her entire body at the mental image of Hoseok wrapping his hands around Donghyuk’s throat.  You slip a finger under the collar of your blouse and search for your scar -- closing your eyes at the familiar feel of the raised skin.  

You remind yourself that you are not a normal woman.

“Hoseok uncovered Kang’s involvement with the Ssijog even before we found the payouts.”  Your brother pauses, a wry twist to his mouth as he continues.  “He can be a very determined man when something is important to him.”

Namjoon holds your gaze for just a beat too long after delivering that statement.  You look away and walk to his office window.

“Tell me what you’re thinking right now, Amsaja,” you brother says.  You can hear the sound of him pouring his own drink behind you.  “Your silence has me concerned.”

You’re thinking about every time Hyejin feigned concern for you and tried to get you to open up. The days Donghyuk insisted he take you to lunch or to dinner when you insisted you were too swamped.  The bullshit little speech Park Soo gave you the night of the charity dinner about keeping Seoul from falling into the hands of criminals.

You’re thinking about what a joke they all are -- dressing up and looking down their noses at the criminal element they claim to despise.  Wearing their fake piety like a badge of honor and paying for their fine things with dirty money.  

You’re thinking that you’d rather choose a hundred street thugs over any one of their kind.  At least your brother has the balls to wear his sins on his sleeve.  

Namjoon joins you at the window, glass in hand.  

“What I’m thinking, Jaegyueo,” you say calmly, “Is that a lot of things are starting to make sense for me.  I haven’t felt this clear in a very long time.  So, thank you.”

A smile tugs at the corner of your brother’s mouth and you return it.

You clink your glasses together in a toast.

***********************

You are two whiskeys deep when you leave Namjoon’s office.  

Hoseok is waiting in a chair in the hallway.  He stands to his feet when you appear from behind the heavy wooden door.  

You suck in a breath as you take him in -- the sharp beauty of his face and the soft curve of his mouth and the way his suit hugs the lines of his lean body.  You realize, with more than a little embarrassment, that you are staring.

“I’ve got the car warming downstairs,” Hoseok says carefully.  “If you’re ready to go, that is.”

“Yes. Hoseok, I --” you swallow thickly,  “-- I never apologized for what I said to you.  I didn’t mean those things. I’m so sorry.”

Hoseok steps close and reaches one hand out to tuck your hair behind your ear.  You shut your eyes, leaning into his touch and inhaling his scent.

“You’ve had a hell of a night,” he murmurs.  “We can talk about that some other time.  Let’s get you home, yeah?”

You open your eyes to look up at him just as Yoongi rounds the corner and stops dead in his tracks.

“Glad this isn’t awkward,” he mutters, before turning to walk back the same way he came.

**********************

The air in Hoseok’s car is thick with tension on the ride home.

You’ve stopped pretending to not stare, eyes fixed on Hoseok while his eyes stay glued to the road.  He guides the car through a sharp turn and you catch the way he winces as his hand grips the steering wheel.  

A throb of guilt hits you square in the chest.

“You’re hurt.”

“Nah,” Hoseok deflects quickly.  “Just a little sore.”

He won’t look at you.  Why won’t he look at you?

“Namjoon told me you nearly choked Donghyuk to death,” you say quietly, studying his face for any reaction. He slows the car to a stop at a red light and rubs his fingers across his mouth, stares out of his window.

“I wanted to kill him,” he admits.  He takes his aching hand off the steering wheel and flexes his fingers as if reliving the memory of that night. “I almost did.”

That embarrassing reaction flares inside of you again.  This time it slides down your back and pools low between your legs and you have to squeeze your thighs together in response.  You shiver as you remember the promises he made while pressing his body to yours.

“Tell me what you want. I swear to God, I’ll give it to you.”

You’ve never wanted anything as badly as you do Jung Hoseok right now.

*************************

You force yourself to wait for the elevator doors to shut.

The second they do, you crush your body and your mouth to Hoseok’s.  If you catch him off-guard, there’s no way to tell -- not with the way he immediately backs you into the elevator wall, slotting one knee between your thighs.

“No one gets to hurt you anymore,” he groans the words into the shell of your ear, teeth scraping against the sensitive skin of your neck.  “Just like no one gets to touch you anymore.  No one but me.”

The strangled sigh that escapes you is the closest thing Hoseok is going to get to a thank you right now.  You whimper in agreement, gasping when his fingers grip your ass to pull you flush against him.  The swollen outline of his cock brushes against your stomach and you shudder.

The elevator ride is too long and too short, all at the same time.  Hoseok backs you through the doors as soon as they open, fumbling in his pocket for the keys while you suck bruises into his throat.  By some miracle, he gets the door open and both of you through it in one piece.

“Fuck,” Hoseok swears as you wrap your arms around his neck, grinding against his insistent cock.  He has to drag you both into the bedroom as you press against him like a dead weight, teeth nipping at his bottom lip as you both stumble into the bedroom.  You drop out of his grasp when the bed hits the back of your knees.

Hoseok stands back, chest heaving with exertion.

“I need you to hear you say it,” he pants.  “Please.”

You sit up straight on the edge of the bed and unbutton your blouse, slipping it off without hesitation.  “No one gets to touch me,” you breathe, reaching to unclasp your bra.  You toss it away.

“No one but you.”  

Hoseok’s eyes darken to near black.

He shrugs off his suit jacket and slowly pulls off his holster and gun, placing both carefully on top of your dresser.  Then he turns back, body looming over yours.  He cups your cheek with one large hand, looking down at you with such heat that your breath hitches in your chest.

You lean into his touch, fingertips grazing the contour of his cock beneath his suit pants.  

“You promised to give me anything I want,” you whisper, looking up at him from beneath your lashes. He nods slowly, the rasp in his voice betraying the calm on his face.

“Anything.  Name it.”

“I want to take care of you,” you say, pulling the hem of his shirt out of his pants.  Your fingers work the buttons open, one by one.  “Let me.”

Hoseok exhales a heavy breath as you open his shirt and stroke your hands down his chest. You give yourself a moment to admire the lean strength of his body, fingers stroking over the metal tags that hang just above one dark, flat nipple.

His stomach tightens and his cock twitches in his pants when you tilt forward to press a soft kiss to the golden skin just above his belt.  You work it open with unsteady hands and his pants follow just a moment later.

“I want to make you feel good,” you whisper, nuzzling the outline of his length with your cheek.  You push his boxers down his slim hips just enough to expose the head of his cock.  “I don’t want you to think about anything but this.”

Hoseok groans when you flick your tongue against him.  

His cock throbs under your fingertips through the fabric of his underwear when you dip down to tease the head with your mouth.  You lap at the salty moisture gathered at the swollen tip and his head drops back.

“Sweetheart, please --” he grits out, hands reaching for your hair.  He winds his fingers through the strands and jerks when you rake your teeth across the wet ridge under the head of his cock. “-- don’t tease me.”

Some other time you might play the delayed gratification game with him.  You might take hours to torture him and keep him dangling at the precipice of pleasure.  Tonight, though -- the only thing you want to do is make him come so hard he can’t see straight.

“I won’t,” you promise sweetly, pulling the rest of his thick length free from his boxers to wrap your warm fingers around him.  You flick your gaze up to appreciate the way his head is tipped back in pleasure, lips parted.

“Look at me,” you murmur, pumping him with languid strokes.

His eyes are glassy with arousal when he opens them to gaze down at you.  You make sure he’s watching as you take him deep, hollowing your cheeks as you draw your mouth across his length.  He gathers your hair in his hands so he can appreciate the unobstructed view of your private show.

“No one gets to touch you anymore,” you whisper.  You take him down as far as you can again, tongue dragging against the thick vein that runs the length of his cock.  You are panting when you pull off him, tongue running the seam of your lower lip as you catch your breath.

“No one but me.”

Hoseok’s dick jerks in your hand in response, hand tightening in your hair as you lick a long stripe up his shaft.  He chokes out a moan as you lick at the sensitive spot just under the head of his cock, eyes fixed on his.

“No more,” he croaks.  

You pull your mouth away reluctantly, tongue swiping at the taste of him on your lips and the sight seems to set him off.  He grabs your face with both hands, groaning into your mouth as he claims it.

He pulls away, panting.

“Lie back,” he demands between breaths.  You comply without question.

Hoseok leans over you, arms braced on either side of your body as he drops his head down to take one nipple between his teeth.  Your hips jerk at the stimulation and you squirm underneath him, thighs slippery with your own excitement.  He laves at both nipples slowly, thoroughly, until they are aching and wet.  Then he trails a soft line of kisses back up to your ear.

“I want to taste what’s mine,” he whispers, and a pang of arousal hits you so hard you forget to breathe.  You lift your hips to help him pull your skirt away along with your soaked panties and he sinks to his knees on the floor in front of you. Every muscle in your body locks in anticipation.

Hoseok nudges your legs apart with his hands, placing gentle kisses along your inner thighs.  His dark eyes are half-hooded with pleasure by the time he drapes your legs over his shoulders.

“Fuck, you look so good like this,” he groans when you are fully spread open for him.  He drops a kiss on your mound and your body jolts at the sensation, every nerve ending standing at attention.  He moves lower, long fingers tracing the outline of your swollen cunt and you suck in a breath.  

“Beautiful,” he murmurs, dipping one finger into your damp heat.  “Is this all for me?”

“Yes,” you choke out, hands gripping the sheets as his finger flexes inside of you.

“Only for you.”

Hoseok makes a sound of satisfaction deep in his chest before sealing his lips over your aching clit.  You shudder against his mouth when he pulls back to soothe you with the flat of his tongue.  “You don’t know how many times I’ve imagined how you would taste,” Hoseok groans, licking deeply into your wetness.  “It doesn’t even come close.  Nothing comes close to this.”

“Hoseok --”  your hands come off of the sheets to grip into his hair, “-- Hoseok, please don’t stop.”

Your senses are so heightened that just the pressure of the heel of his hand against your cunt is making you crazy.  His finger crooks deep inside you, stroking against your swollen walls while his lips and teeth toy with your clit.  You whine at the stimulation, at the wet drag of his tongue that has you writhing beneath him.

“You’re close sweetheart, I can hear it,” Hoseok’s voice is ragged with arousal. “Let me hear you.  Come for me.”

You clutch his hair between your fingers, moaning brokenly as the heat between your legs simmers to a boil.

“Hoseok --”

“That’s it,” he praises you with dirty words spoken in the sweetest way. “Let me taste you. Let me hear you.”

Hoseok is prepared the moment you come apart.

He grasps your hips firmly in those large, warm hands of his -- tongue and lips persistent as the live wire inside you tightens and snaps. The force of your orgasm shakes your entire body and leaves you begging and breathless. Hoseok savors every drop of your release until your hips sink back into the mattress and you protest weakly against the threat of overstimulation.

The mattress dips under you as Hoseok joins you on the bed, lips swollen with use and mouth marked with your taste.  His head dips into the hollow of your neck, nipping gently at the skin, while his fingers skate over the soft skin of your stomach and thighs.  

You shiver in his hold, closing your eyes for a moment to savor the feeling of his body on yours.

“I want to watch you come like that every day,” Hoseok whispers into your ear.  “Only for me.”

“Only for you,” you agree in a whisper, finding your voice after what seems like ages.  

You slip one hand between you, fingers wrapping firmly around the rigid cock pressed against your stomach.  Hoseok groans when you tighten your hand around him.

“Hoseok,” you breathe, feeling a pulse between your legs that seems to beat in time with the throb of his cock in your palm, “Fuck me please, I’m losing my mind.”

His hoarse chuckle sends a shiver up your spine as he moves to cover you completely with his body.  He lines up the head of his cock at your entrance and you tilt your hips up into his.  

“Please,” you plead again, lifting your head to brush your lips against his.  “Now.”

He sinks his cock into you slowly, inch by inch, groaning at the tight fit of your cunt around him.  The stretch inside of you is nearly too much -- you whimper when he bottoms out and he drops his forehead to yours.

“You okay? Am I hurting you?”

His entire body feels like a rubber band ready to snap -- coiled energy waiting to be released.  But he holds back the instinct to move until you nod your agreement.

“You feel so good,” you murmur, nudging his hips to move with your own.  You stroke your hands down the slick skin of his back.  “I’m so full right now.”

Hoseok swears under his breath as he tentatively rocks his hips against yours, letting you adjust to the feeling of him inside of you.  You wrap your legs around him as the discomfort subsides and the only sensation that’s left is the pleasant pressure of his cock against your walls.

Hoseok’s hips move harder as your whimpers melt into moans.

“Dammit,” he swears, head dropping low between his shoulder blades.  “So tight and wet for me.  So perfect for me.”

You look up to take in the sight of his perfect face slack with pleasure, mouth parted and face flushed with exertion.  His dog tags hang from his neck, swaying as his hips begin to piston in earnest.  You pull on them to force his mouth close to yours.

“Only for you,” you whisper, “No one else.”

Hoseok’s steady rhythm stutters when you whisper those words into his mouth and press your lips to his.  His hips jerk wildly as his release races up his shaft.  He laces his fingers into yours, fucking you deep into the mattress in those final seconds as he loses all control to chasing his end.

He comes with your name on his lips.

************************

Hoseok breathes deeply into your hair as you stroke your fingers across the lean lines of his chest, fingers tracing the metal outline of his dog tags.  You lie together like that for a while, skin to skin.

Your thoughts are loud in the quiet.  

You’re used to the bitter sting of betrayal by now.  

Long before Lee Hyejin or Kang Donghyuk or Park Soo ever sold you out for a check, your own father betrayed you for the bottle.  You of all people know too well that most people aren’t to be trusted.

But then Hoseok’s fingers drag lightly across your back and they bring you back to the here and now -- back to the promise he made to you tonight.

“No one gets to hurt you anymore.”

And you decide to trust just one more time.

************************

@saintjeonofbusan @lemonjoonah @illnevertrustmyselfagain @sunkissed725 @taetaewonderland @shadowhale @sugaminyoonjiji @jinhitwhore @trust-me-im-joly @daydreambrliever @jjeonjoon @ultraanonymousey @yoon-bug @multistantrash17 @poohsaidhi @alyboo-jpeg @sahmfanficbts @yoongissugarmommy @ppersonna @p-polaroid @vi-hoshi @stressedinmedschool247 @jgissle12 @ctvrty @btsnatalena @strawbewymiwk @stephleee @jalexa83 @livanthi @fantasybangtan @trviahope​ @mono-kookie@hauntedlilies @sugasaidbultaoreune @yeojaa @secret-alphabets @hodginss@parkjimin-persona​

[lia-jones]

Growing Pains - Chapter Three - Andrea, Not Idiot

As promised, my doorbell rang at precisely 8:20. 10 minutes before I had to leave to LFG. It was the mechanic, holding the keys of my car.

“It was the oil pump, it was broken. I fixed it, as well as other things. It’ll work like a beauty now.” The mechanic said, without greeting me.

“Good, how much to I owe you?” I said, worried about how much that would cost me. Cheap car, expensive bills, my father would say.

“It’s already paid for. I need to go. My coworker is double-parked waiting for me.” The mechanic left as quickly and unceremoniously as he came.

I looked at my wristwatch, it was 8:25 already. If I didn’t leave right away, I would be late. I grabbed my purse and the plastic bag laying on the sofa, and left to work.

When I arrived at LFG, Ted was already waiting for me.

“Bringing your dry cleaning to work? Don’t let Victor see that.” He pointed at the plastic bag with a hanger that I was holding.

“Don’t worry, I’ll get it out of the way in a moment. Has Victor arrived?” I asked, turning on my computer and taking some files out of my drawer.

“No, don’t worry. Go get your coffee, I’ll hold the fort for you.”

I went to the coffee room to get a cup of coffee, mentally reminding myself of all the things I had to do that day. Seeing I was alone in the coffee room, I allowed myself to hum the music I had been listening to while driving to work. It was this blues song by Sara Bareilles, Manhattan.

The pot was empty, so I washed it, and filled the coffee maker with water and ground coffee. As I waited for the pot to fill with a fresh brew, my fingers tapped on the table, trying to figure out the chords she played for that song in her piano, getting myself more and more immersed in the tune.

You can have Manhattan, I’m sure it’s for the best

I’ll gather up the avenues, and leave them on your doorstep.

And I’ll tiptoe away, so you won’t have to say you heard me leave.

You can have Manhattan, I know it’s what you want.

The bustle and the buildings, the weather in the Fall

And I’ll bow out of place to save you some space for somebody new.

You can have Manhattan ‘cause I can’t have you.

I sang to myself, my eyes closed, mesmerized by the depth of the lyrics. This was one of those songs that, although sad, hit you right on your core, making everything that’s negative spill all over, leaving you fresh and revived. I filled my cup while humming the notes she played in the solo part, wondering if I could replay it if my piano wasn’t back in Portugal.

I was so distracted with my own thoughts I didn’t notice someone else was in the room. Worse than that, I didn’t notice someone was in the room standing right behind me. I quickly turned to go back to my seat, when I collided with something hard that I wasn’t expecting to be there.

“Fuck!” I almost yelled as the coffee mug tilted my way and spilled all over my arm, the coffee almost at boiling temperature. I held the mug with my left hand while trying to shake the hot coffee out of my right arm.

 “What kind of an idiot sneaks behind people like that?” I gritted between my teeth, looking up to see who was the moron. It was the CEO. His eyes were wide and his mouth slightly open, and it looked like he was every bit as mortified as I was. It took him like a nanosecond to get his poker face back on, as he took my hand and led it to under the faucet, turning the cold water on.

I was speechless, as he carefully pulled the sleeve of my sweater up and moved my hand so the stream of water would glide over my forearm. He turned off the faucet and took a clean kitchen cloth from one of the drawers, dabbing my arm with it.

“You don’t seem to be burnt, but you should apply something to heal it, just in case. I’ll ask Goldman to stop by the pharmacy and get you something suitable for this.” He said, still working on drying my arm, his eyes not leaving his hands. I took my arm from his grip abruptly, feeling myself blush furiously.

“It’s ok, I don’t think I am hurt at all.” I had no nerve to look him in the eyes, remembering I just called him an idiot.

“I’m surprised to see you’re still alive, judging by how clumsy you are. Remind me to forbid any knives at the office.” He joked, although it seemed more like an insult than a joke.

“Or maybe I should remind you to wear a bell instead of a tie, since you move as silently as a cat.” I retorted, my tone moody. My sweater’s sleeve was drenched in hot coffee, I felt entitled to be a little bitchy.

“Or maybe you shouldn’t be so distracted and mind your surroundings.” He replied immediately, his tone sour, not appreciating my comeback. But I didn’t lose any time either.

“I apologize, I’m used to polite people saying good morning when they arrive. That usually tells me they’re in the room.” He was about to throw some more verbal venom at me, his expression even angrier than before, when I interrupted him, in a much softer voice. “Did I spill any coffee on you?”

“Surprisingly, no.” His tone softened as well. “It must be my lucky week, I survived you twice already.” I could see he was trying to hide a smile, but ignored it. I turned away to leave when I heard his voice again. “Did the mechanic deliver the car on time?”

“Yes! I do need to talk to you about that!” I was about to continue, but Victor stopped me.

“In my office.” He said as he walked away.

“I’ll meet you there in a minute. I have something to give you.” I ran to my desk and grabbed the plastic bag neatly laying on the chair next to mine. I went to Victor’s office, the door was ajar and he already sitting on his desk, reading something on his laptop.

“What do you want to talk about again?” He said, closing the laptop and giving me his full attention.

“First, here. I took your jacket home by accident.” I said, handing him the plastic bag. He opened it and took the jacket out.

“It smells… different.” He said, bringing the jacket to his nose and smelling it.

“I washed it and ironed it. It’s pristine clean.”

“You did all of that last night?” He asked, raising his eyebrow at me.

“Yes, but that’s not really what I want to talk about.” I said, changing the subject. “The mechanic wouldn’t bill me for fixing my car, so I assume you paid for it? How much do I owe you?”

Victor opened his laptop again, uninterested in the subject. After a long minute, he finally answered.

“Uhh… Yes. Your assumption is incorrect. I did not pay for it.” He said, typing away on his keyboard.

“Then who did?” I asked, confused, and slightly uncomfortable.

“LFG’s insurance.” He frowned, like he was trying to remember something and then looked at me. “I can’t recall you ever presenting your reports to me.”

“Ted usually does that for me, since he’s my supervisor.” I said, starting to fidget. I did not want to have to make a presentation for Victor Lee.

“Will you ask Ted to sign your internship certificate when you finish it?” He asked, his voice flat.

“Of course not, sir.” I promptly answered. “You’ll have to sign it.” I felt like I was in the army. God, that guy made me nervous.

“Be at my office at 6 pm sharp, with your reports ready for presentation. From now on, I will be your supervisor and you’ll report directly to me, understood?” I could feel the rigidness of an order.

“If I may ask, why the change? I’m pleased with my supervisor. I have no complaints.” I tried to argue, respectfully.

“Who do you think decides who supervises you? Ted?” I didn’t want to reply, the obvious answer was Victor, and it made me feel dumb to state the obvious, so I nodded silently, showing him I’d seen his point. The CEO, however, was not pleased with just a nod. “Well?” He insisted. “Did you forget how to talk?”.

“You, Sir. You are the CEO.” I answered, trying not to roll my eyes at him.

“6 pm. Come prepared.” He said, focusing on the screen of his laptop. “And I believe I expressed my disagreement over you calling me Sir.”

“I apologize. I will be here later, Sir. I mean, Victor.”

He was already entirely focused on his work, not even aware that I was leaving.

At 6 pm sharp I knocked on his door. Victor closed his laptop as I came in.

“Conference room.” He said shortly, pointing outside.

I marched quickly to the conference room to quickly plug in my computer to the screen on the wall, so I would have everything ready the minute the CEO sat down. And for a second it dawned on me why Goldman kept running all the time. Just like me, he expected a scolding every time he had to do something.

Victor walked in and took his jacket off. Then, he grabbed the knot of his tie and slid it down, removing the tie in one swift movement. Laying both items on the chair next to him, he sat down and started rolling up his sleeves.

“Let’s begin.” He said, as he undid the first two buttons of his shirt.

I started my presentation with three of the companies I was assisting investment-wise, speaking of both progress and issues the companies had been through, when I noticed Victor was slumped on his chair, his head precariously resting on the back of the chair, his eyes closed. Apparently, he was asleep. I stared at him, unsure of what to do. And for a moment, I let myself watch the slumbering figure in front of me, his usual cold and aloof expression replaced with a placid, relaxed one. The unbuttoned shirt showed his collarbone, distinct and masculine, and a little of what I suspected were very defined pectorals. If not for his temper and bitchy attitude, Victor was a very attractive man. I wondered for a moment what would be like to be in his bed, those large hands holding my back, his cute butt moving as he thrust me with his…

“I didn’t say stop. Although I have to warn I may fall asleep. Not at all what I expected from one of the future brilliant minds in Economics.” Ok, so he was not sleeping, he was just being an asshole, calling my presentation a snore-fest.

“Any comments on my work you’d like to make so far?” I asked, bitterly. If you are going to insult me, at least have the decency to do it to my face.

“Not quite yet. How do you suggest the companies should act regarding said issues?” He said, his eyes still closed.

I presented my next slide, answering his question. He sat up straight, opening his eyes. He had this evil smirk on his face, and I sort of expected him to rub his hands mischievously.

“This sounds something like Ted would say. Did Ted write your report?”

“I wrote my report. Ted provided guidance, that’s all.” I answered, offended.

“I see. And he told you this was the right answer?”

“He told me this is the answer that would please you.” I confessed. Because at the moment it seemed all my work was to please Victor, the slayer of souls and destroyer of joy.

He looked me in the eyes, his expression fierce. I could guess a bit of resentment in it too.

“Are you that afraid of me?” He asked, squinting at me. “Am I such a monster in your eyes?”

“Everybody is a little afraid of you.” I answered flatly. And for the life of me, I couldn’t figure out why I had decided to be so honest at that moment. I guess I was feeling trapped.

Victor’s eyes shimmered a bit, and then his poker face was back on.

“Do you agree with those recommendations for your companies? Speak truthfully.”

“No, I don’t. I would suggest something else. I wrote these under Ted’s advisement.”

Victor leaned with his elbows on the table, his forehead resting on his entwined hands. He was clearly frustrated, sighing heavily, as if he had some nasty words to say to me but was holding them down.

“I called your previous employers inquiring about you. The future of Economics, they said. A breath of fresh air, they said. Innovation meets elegance, they said. The golden child. Not that I believed a word of that, but I wanted to see what that golden child looked like. And disappointed doesn’t come near to describe how I feel. You are simply an idiot, just like those other idiots that beg to work for me.” His words were bitter, reminding me too much of Daniel in the final months of our little hell. Undermining. Belittling.

“You know what? Other employees may take this crap from you, but I certainly won’t.” I spat, the bad blood rising fast. “You are a bully, no more than that. You believe that because you have the most expensive toys in the playground, you get to whack all the other kids with them. I can’t really decide what to feel about you. One moment you’re this kind yet socially awkward person, the other you’re just plain rude and entitled. I’m not an idiot, nor a moron, or a dummy, or other endearing nicknames you usually call your staff. My name is Andrea, and although it may be hard for you to pronounce because it’s Portuguese, I’ve heard you say it correctly before, so I trust you can do it again. Andrea, not idiot.”

Victor sat quietly, his eyes wide, his mouth hanging. I was pretty sure I was being fired, so I took the chance and the guts I had left to blurt out all I wanted to say. But this time, my voice was softer.

“You expect me to know, but you never teach. You just expect people to learn by osmosis, as that would ever be possible, because your temper won’t let anyone go near. You never heard me say I was a golden child, or even act like one. I told you, I came here because I was eager to learn from you and others like you, because I respect your work and how much you’ve accomplished, and so far all I have are insults. I can surely say I’m pretty disappointed too.”

I could see Victor wanted to retort, his mouth moving slightly, but no words would come out. I turned to my laptop to disconnect it from the screen, and started gathering up my things.

“No need to fire me, I will hand you my resignation letter tomorrow.” I almost whispered, my back turned to him, “This is clearly not working for the both of us. Good day.”

And without another word, I took my belongings and left the conference room, absolutely sure that the following day would be my last one there.

[koparatnewton09-blog]

Buying a Condo Conversion

Never question the ingenuity of the real estate developer.

Close to 20 years ago, two of my best buddies and I decided to pool our resources after college and get an apartment of our own.

The three of us were barely able to afford a 3 bedroom apartment that was about 10 years old at the time. We paid about $500/mo. in rent. To this day, I am not sure how we could afford that apartment.

The apartment was a dump. The flooring, the kitchen and, especially, the bathrooms were so bad, that my father walked in one day with a horrified look of disgust on his face, and refused to stay. However, that was what my buddies and I called home.

Today, nearly 30 years later I am doing loans for people buying units in that same apartment complex. Today, it's a condo conversion!!

The entire complex has been remodeled, and the units are going for nearly $175,000 a unit.

Pure genius!

You all know about condo conversions and how incredibly hot they are in the market. Low interest rates have driven new home sales through the roof and condos are no exception.

First time home buyers are flocking to get in any way they can. This has actually crippled the apartment business and is driving the biggest condominium conversion boom in 20 years.

Over 12,000 apartment units in Las Vegas are currently mapped for condo conversions. Condo developers are paying a premium to acquire and transform old apartment complexes into condos and they are doing this all across the country, especially Las Vegas and South Florida.

The developers typically search for apartment-to-condo conversions in desirable locations where they won't directly compete with affordable entry- level homes.

They want to offer an affordable alternative to pricier single-family homes or to costlier condos in new developments. 

In many cases, condo conversions provide the perfect entry-level opportunity for renters to become home owners, allowing these new property owners to build equity and realize their homeownership dream.

Transforming apartment buildings into condominiums is quicker and less risky than construction from the ground up. click to find out more kopart at newton show flat

Land prices have gone up so high that many developers cannot afford to build entry-level housing, so this is a great option. Home buyers then benefit because converted units are usually more affordable than new ones, and many are in choice locations. You can find some of these units advertised locally for as low as the $90's.

Conversion developers say they can buy something for one-third of the cost that it would take to buy the vacant land and build something on it.

The beauty for the developer is that the condo conversion isn't going to be selling for one-third of what it would cost brand new. It's more like 75%-85% of it.

The developers usually do a pretty nice job improving the property and the units. Upgrades are usually made to the property's exterior and common areas. Then they add on the sizzle. Granite counter tops, upgraded cabinetry and fixtures, and wood floors are often added to individual units. The upgrades are built into the condo prices.

Once the developer acquires an apartment complex, they generally convince about 10-15% of the existing renters to stay by buying a unit. They will often offer these people discounts before they ever even market to the general public.

The obvious key to selling these units to your clients is to convince buyers that they are better off owning versus renting or to get your more timid investors to jump in with less financial risk.

People have a desire to own a home. There are very few who want to rent and low interest rates have provided this opportunity.

Condo conversions create more affordable housing in areas when the price for a single-family home skyrockets like we have seen throughout the country. A single family home in Las Vegas, where I live, is averaging around $300,000. That is simply not affordable for your average first-time home buyer.

Speculators and investors make up 30-50% of all condo conversion buyers. They buy these units, intending to sell them at a higher price in a short term.

Rising interest rates historically have slowed conversion activity. This slows down the appreciation as well. It's difficult to convince someone to pay $1200 per month on a mortgage for a 1000 sq. ft condo. However, get it under $1000 and you will find buyers.

Before you invest in one of these units and plan on renting it out, or you plan to buy one to live in, you must know a few things.

Condo conversions are marketed to the very same people who rent apartments. Thirty to 50% of all condo conversion buyers are investors and speculators.

When they go to rent their units, they are competing for the very same market as the developer of the project. Why rent when you can buy? Why rent from you either?

Once cheap mortgages vanish, and rates have been rising recently as you all know, condo conversions will become riskier. When home sales slow, converters may find it harder to sell their condos.

Once 30 year interest rates hit 7% or 8%, experts say, condo conversions will cool. Today, we are at around 6.25%. The good news is condo conversions are almost the last bastion of truly affordable housing in many areas.

Here are some things to keep in mind...

Many people buying condo conversions don't realize that the property they are buying is different from a newly constructed unit. This means the financial exposure for repairs and replacements can be much higher.

New condominiums, built from the ground up, are constructed with the building materials of today and have to conform to today's more strict building codes.

The condition of converted condominiums can vary. An older apartment complex converted to condos could have wear and tear and may have structural faults unknown at closing. These problems can become a real hindrance later on.

Newer apartments that have been converted to condominiums in the past few years were probably constructed under the latest building codes and have new building components, mechanical systems and interior finishes. These are a safer bet and you will want to find out the year the original structure was built.

Many older buildings have been converted as well. Some converters gut an apartment building, taking it down to its "shell," and then rebuild it, installing new plumbing, roof and mechanical systems.

Other developers simply do "cosmetic rehabs," leaving the building components as is and merely sprucing up the property to make units more marketable.

Buyers beware. Are you buying a fully renovated building that was taken down to the shell, or are you buying a building that someone just slapped some paint on and put in a few new windows?

What about problems to the complex? Although most developers do a terrific job in converting, what if the roof needs to be repaired after a few years? Does the association have enough reserves to cover it? Many people believe condo conversion owners can expect special assessments quicker than new condo buyers.

You do have some safeguards. As a lender for condo conversion buyers, we often require an engineer's report from the developer before we close the loan. You have a right to this document as well.

It tells you what was done to the building and the sales office can give you a copy of this if you ask.

Here are some other things you should know before buying a condo conversion:

They usually have restrictive covenants. Every condominium project has rules and restrictions that govern what unit owners can do. If you own a pet, make sure your building is pet-friendly. Do you even get a covered parking space?

Are you buying the unit as an investor to rent out? You will want to make sure the building allows rentals and the minimum term required.

If speculators cannot resell their units they will rent them out too. If there are many renters, that can create problems with condo owners in the same building and lead to maintenance issues.

Renters tend to care far less about their homes than do the home's owner. Too many renters can destroy the complex and it's value.

Speculators buy as much as 70% of some condominium projects. You may be moving into a building that is nearly vacant. That may not be what you had hoped for.

Once a condominium project has more than 30% of its owners that use it as a second home or as an investment property, the condos all become "non-warrantable."

Non-warrantable condos mean the project is not insured by Fannie Mae. This means a different kind of loan for the buyer of your condo. Many banks do not loan on non-warrantable condos. We offer non-warrantable condo loans. Even though they are very competitive, even offering 100% financing, the loan programs are not quite the same as they are on a warrantable condo.

Here is a time and problem saving tip:

When you are selling a condo, of any kind, you want to make sure you or your agent contacts the Homeowner's Association, early in the process, and asks them what percentage of the project is non-owner occupied. If it's over 30%, you want to communicate this immediately to your buyer. He has to make sure his lender can do the loan or he may have to change lenders. It is best if you know this early.

Many condo conversions are considered non-warrantable.

The bottom line is condo conversions offer affordable housing in many areas where the first-time homebuyer and the real estate investor, who wants to take on a little less financial risk, are starting to be turned away. However, as a buyer you want to be very cautious and ask questions about the building's history and residential make-up.

[098lnr3m-blog]

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[not-poignant]

Hey Pia, recently I started therapy but my therapist brushed aside me being emotionally abused & gaslit by my sibling by saying sibling fights are normal & we should focus on how I continue 'letting' it happen. I left the session rlly upset & it sent me into a spiral of self-loathing & doubt all over again/had I made everything up after all? I'm in a better place now but it would be lovely if you could tell me how to deal with such situations better, but no pressure!

Oh boy, bad therapists. Have I had some experience with them.

tl;dr: bad therapists suck, don’t give up, etc. etc.

THIS POST IS SO LONG I AM SO SORRY

Firstly, it is awesome you made the effort to go see a therapist. And please please don’t think all therapists (or even most therapists) will be like the one you saw.

Therapists are regular people, and unfortunately, sometimes regular people suck and a degree doesn’t change that.

Caveat: Not a therapist. Just a person who has seen a lot of therapists. YMMV.

I have seen a lot of therapists in my lifetime. And a lot of bad therapists. I won’t give you the exact number, but it’s well over 10. It’s actually pretty normal to sometimes meet therapists that are just a poor match. Even if the therapist had good reasons to think you were participating in a difficult situation, there’s a lot of ways to bring that up that aren’t straight up invalidating, and they should have tried to hear you, rather than put their opinions forward over yours.

Therapy should be a collaboration. Not just you listening to them. Not just them listening to you. They might disagree with you, they have to be able to do so tactfully and respectfully, and role model to you how to do this in a way that is respectful. And you have the right to disagree with them.

And I’m gonna be honest with you. Sometimes therapists will say things you’re not ready to hear, that hurt and make you doubt yourself. When I first heard: ‘Pia, do you think maybe you want to be sick?’ I about lost my shit internally, and went home and felt suicidal for two weeks. I didn’t think they were right, but I was terrified they were right, and I didn’t think I could tell them about it because how dare they ask me that question in the first place! What the hell?

But I went back and was like: okay, so after this session, and what you said, this is what happened. And I felt totally unsupported and certainly didn’t feel like I could tell you about this, because what, are you gonna tell me I want to be suicidal too? Here are all the ways I think I don’t want to be sick. I’m still deeply scared that deep down I might want to be, but I think you have to realise that what you’ve said is really hurtful to all the parts of me that fight every day - through lifestyle, coming here, eating well, reading self help books etc. - to not be sick. And I need you to acknowledge that.

And they did. And they apologised. Do I think maybe they wanted me to have a reaction? Yes. Do I think maybe they had no idea it would make me suicidal? I think also yes. They never would’ve done it otherwise. The aim isn’t to make your clients want to kill themselves. At all. Ever.

But anyway, the point is (...ignore how long I took to get here), part of therapy is actually telling the therapist when they’ve fucked up and seeing how receptive they are to that. That’s your responsibility as the client, and that’s something you take on when you hire them. Whether or not you feel you can do that is another thing. It’s totally okay to write down how you feel in a letter, and hand it to them, or email it to them. You can say ‘read this and I’m going to go wait in the waiting room and you can come get me after.’ I have written down a ton of things I wasn’t ready to say.

But it’s an important step in actually - weirdly - learning how to stand up for yourself in a working relationship that goes both ways.

Now, about therapy in general. They work for you. You hire them for your health. So if it’s really not working out, then you also have the right to fire them and find someone else.

Sometimes it can be worth explaining why you’re considering firing them in an email, so they know where they went wrong, but to also give them a chance to reconsider how they’re approaching you, i.e.: ‘I feel like you invalidated my experiences and my feelings, and therefore reduced all of my difficulties and issues around this to something you could sweep aside before telling me things about my own experiences, without ever really hearing me. That’s not fair, it’s inaccurate and it’s not helpful to me. I accept that I might have things to learn about my own behaviour here, but not through you invalidating my upset and hurt, and not through you minimising my real feelings. Because of what you did, these were the consequences (and tell them that you became more self-loathing and so on, that’s not how they’re supposed to leave you feeling after a session!) As a result, I’m not sure / don’t think this is a good fit / will look for another therapist / would be open to suggestions from you as to how to proceed.’ Etc.

That’s a mature way of handling it. (And honestly, even if the therapist doesn’t like getting the email, it is good for them to know why people are leaving early. So they know you’re not just a ‘non-compliant patient’ or whatever the fuck (which you’re not), but someone who has been genuinely distressed by a session that they directly contributed to - like you paid money for that shit! That’s crappy.)

But another mature way, if they really just seem gross, is to fire them and find someone else. You can take a break first, for sure. I always have taken a short break and sort of thought about what I really want too. Like, what do I want? These days it’s ‘to be more functional and to enjoy life more.’

It’s worth calling around and actually screening therapists if you can (depending on how the system works where you are). Screening therapists can be asking things like: what therapy modalities do you prefer? How do you deal with situations where someone is being verbally abused by their sibling? Do you take this seriously? etc. You can definitely pre-screen. I’ve always done this in emails which look like this:

“Dear (whoever they are)

I’m (such and such) from (place) and have been diagnosed with (disorders) due to (one sentence history). I am seeking therapy to help me with (specific things like - learning how to be less anxious, or learning how to be more functional in my life).

Are you taking new clients?

If you are, could you please let me know the following to see if we might be a good fit? 

(Here I ask about modality - CBT is contraindicated in my case so it rules out a lot of therapists automatically, and then I ask about their experience in extensive child abuse trauma and history, as well as medical and chronic illness, and pain and fatigue issues. Here is also where I ask if they offer a sliding scale to people with a low income and no insurance.)

Thanks so much for your time.

(Pia.)”

If they can’t take the time to answer a simple email, either with a call or by replying, then I don’t want to see them anyway, imho. I’m looking to hire them, not the other way around, they can at least communicate some actual credentials to me that mean more than a damn BA degree. But in Australia, therapists will often reply to emails like this. I’m not sure how that is in other places in the world.

Now as to the actual meaty part of like, you going home and feeling fucking awful afterwards. Here’s some stuff you may want to keep in mind in the future:

1. They work for you. And their job is not to make you feel like you are the worst ever. That is no therapist’s job on the planet. Challenging you is not making you decompensate and become non-functional. They fucked up. Sometimes therapy will be challenging and sometimes it will hurt and if you are prone to feeling self-doubt it is going to make you self-doubt. But there is a line between ‘this is stuff that would come up anyway’ and ‘this is something you directly made happen by invalidating my feelings.’ When that happens, it is not a sign that you are the worst ever (you are not even the worst), it is a sign that they made a mistake in their job, like any person who has a job can do.

Unfortunately when therapists make mistakes, they’re making mistakes with people’s psyches, instead of fucking up the icing on a cake, or the level on a brick wall.

But yeah, they are not some authority on high to tell you What is What about Your Life.

The only expert on your life is you. And you invite them into that space to treat you with respect in the process. Invalidating your feelings is not respect. (And I say that even as someone who has disproportionate reactions to things.)

2. Idk what your support situation is like, but it may be worth reaching out to people (or animals) who can make you smile or feel a bit better or get you outside of your head for a bit.

3. Sensory stimulation to also get you outside of your head for a bit. A warm/hot shower or bath. Running your hand over interesting textures like velvet or a nubby couch. Sipping a hot drink that you took the time to make for yourself.

4. Reflecting on what’s actually happening internally like. ‘I feel like they think i’m X and X’ or ‘they must think that I’m just X’ or whatever it is. And then write that down somewhere - both for yourself, and if you decide to share it with them later, so you have clarity on what’s occurring. Sometimes just naming what you’re going through can give you enough knowledge to be like ‘right, I’m afraid that a relative stranger thinks I’m terrible because they know almost nothing about my history and they made an assumption about me.’ - If you take a step back from that, it can help to remember they are a relative stranger who knows almost nothing about you.

*

It’s hard here because I’m not in that session and I don’t know why the therapist said what they said (though trust me, I do believe you that they fucked up - some of them suuuuck), and I know that you go to therapy to be challenged, because if your therapist is just ‘hey fam everything you’re doing and thinking is fine go home you’re just great’ - you’re gonna go home and nothing is going to change. But I think you and I both know that there’s ways of challenging people which don’t suuuuuuck, and that if you have a good trusting bond with your therapist, you can also tell them when they fuck up, and they will actually make steps to repair that with you, so you can be stronger going into the future.

That’s actually one of the best parts of a therapeutic bond, imho, especially as someone coming from an emotionally abusive background - learning how to repair mistakes and realising that you can both do that collaboratively together, and see things get stronger. (Since, in situations of abuse, ruptures can mean no opportunities for genuine forgiveness or growth ever).

But you can’t do it with all therapists. Because some therapists are just shitty at their jobs. Like a bad baker. Or like the dude that makes pizzas but you know he just doesn’t care about pizzas really. Or the doctor who fat-shames instead of doing their fucking job.

I don’t know if I said anything that helped. All I have is some sense of solidarity because I have done the whole bad therapists thing too. My life was helped a lot by realising I was hiring them, and that they work for me. Before that, I always felt like they were some kind of godly authority figure that could see into my inner mind in a way I couldn’t and blah blah blah could Judge Me Like A God (thanks childhood, for featuring an abusive figure who was a cop that fucked up my relationship with authority figures forever). It was really hard for me to understand that no, they’re just like every other damn person you’re gonna hire to work for you: they can be fired if they’re not good at their job or if their vision is totally different to yours.

You’d fire an interior decorator who wanted to fit out your house in something you hated. You definitely have to fire a therapist who wants to fit out your brain in something that makes you hate yourself.

[marketwatch0]

75 Questions to Ask When Hiring a Church Architect

The design and construction of church facilities may very well be one of the most important activities in your organization's history. One of the many critical components of your building success is hiring the right architect. Your church should consider at least 3-4 architects or design/build firms who have a good reputation for building the type and style of structures you are considering and are familiar with designing within the budget range you can afford.

General Background Questions

1. How long has the architect been in business?

2. What percentage of the firm's business is designing church facilities?

3. How many people does the architect's firm employ?

4. Does the architect have a valid license for the state in which you intend to build?

5. Does the architect commonly do church projects of the style, size and budget that you anticipate building?

6. Is the architect familiar with the nuances of your denomination and worship style and what this may mean in building design?

7. Does the architect have a specific design style and how well does their design style match what you are looking to build?

8. Does the architect intend to use consultants for this project and if so, how are they paid?

9. Does the architect carry insurance?

10. What are the policy limits for each type of insurance carried?

11. Will the architect provide proof of insurance should the church decide to hire the firm?

12. When and what was the architect's most recent project?

13. When and where was the architect's most current project like yours?

14. May the church see examples of the architect's previous projects that are similar to your proposed project, including sketches, photos, plans and budgets?

15. Should the church decide to hire their firm, may the church get the names, addresses, and telephone numbers of the clients for these previous similar projects?

16. What services did the architect provide for those church clients during the design, bidding, and construction phases?

17. Who will provide each of these services for the church: the architect, the architect's employees, or outside professionals?

18. What was the actual construction cost versus the architect's estimated cost for each of these projects, and how do they account for the variance?

19. Who from the firm will the church be directly dealing with? Is it the same person who will be designing the project? If not, who will be designing it and what direct interaction will the church have with this person?

20. What is the proposed mediation process for resolving disputes and will the architect agree to binding arbitration?

Proposed Project Questions

1. What are the most significant challenges of the proposed project and how does the architect anticipate dealing with them?

2. How well does the architect understand the church's goals and constraints? (Ask the architect to reiterate back to you the overall goals, design and budget constraints and evaluate how well they understand them.)

3. How confident is the architect of meeting the church's proposed schedule?

4. What experience does the architect have translating ministry needs into space requirements?

5. What is the objective process that the architect will use to gather information to help evaluate the needs & goals of the ministry to provide the optimum design solution?

6. What sort of information will the church need to provide, and when?

7. What services does the architect propose to provide during construction?

8. Which of the proposed services are optional?

9. What are the steps, or phases, in the design process and how long should each take?

10. What does the architect show to explain and present the project? (Models, computer 3D models, color renderings, line sketches, etc.)

11. What are the options and price differences for each option?

12. How viable does the architect believe your proposed project is with respect to timeline, budget and land constraints?

Fees & Contractual Issues

1. How does the architect establish fees and when will payments be expected?

2. How does the architect tie fee payments to milestones or phases in the scope of work?

3. What are the architectural and engineering fees for each phase of this project?

4. What specific services do the fees cover?

5. How does the architect establish fees for additional services?

6. How does the architect establish fees for reimbursable expenses?

7. What additional costs (e.g. permit, impact and other governmental fees) or services (e.g. time spent obtaining permits and approvals) does the architect anticipate for your project in addition to architectural and engineering fees?

8. If consultants or engineers (civil, structural, mechanical, electrical, geotechnical, testing and inspection, etc.) are necessary, are their fees included in the architects quoted fee or are they separate services?

9. How might the church structure the contract so that the church has the ability to "walk away" from the agreement at the conclusion of any phase without additional cost or penalty?

10. How does the church insure they own and have the right to use the intellectual property (drawings, research findings, etc.) from each phase if they should decide to terminate their relationship with the architect?

11. What engineering work will the architect sub-contract, will it be sent out for bid and will the church be able to see these bids?

12. What is the architect's markup on 3rd party services if they sub-contract out the work?

13. Will the architect provide construction cost estimates for the project?

14. What happens if the architect's construction estimates are not in line with construction quotes?

15. Who is liable for the cost of redesign if it is necessary to meet the construction budget?

16. Will there be additional charges for changes required by the building department or other government agency? If so, how are these charges calculated?

17. How are additional charges computed for design changes requested by the church after working drawings are already completed?

18. How are additional charges computed for design changes requested by the contractor?

19. Who is financially responsible for correcting errors and omissions in design and bids?

20. Will the architect provide a fixed price agreement for each phase instead of a percentage based fee? (Fixed price is usually better.)

Making the Final Decision

Don't go by your feelings, check the references! Call or visit each reference that each architect gives you and ask and evaluate the answers to the following questions:

1. How well did the architect adhere to schedules?

2. How well did the architect live up to the expectation they set during the sales phase?

3. Did the project complete within budget? If not, why not?

4. Were you pleased with the architect's services and your working relationship with the architect? (Compare to the architects explanation to the same question)

5. Did the architect listen to your concerns and attempt to resolve them to your satisfaction?

6. Would you hire the architect again? Why or why not?

7. What problems surfaced during the project?

8. What were the architect's strong points?

9. What were the architect's weak points?

10. What would you do different the next time?

11. Ask each reference about other projects they know the architect was involved with. This will give you some additional references to check. Remember no one will knowingly hand out references that won't give a glowing report. Seeking out other "off list" references may give you a more balanced viewpoint.

Subjective Issues To Evaluate And Consider When Hiring An Architect

These are questions that you may not always directly ask, but may evaluate from the responses to other questions and actions.

1. How interested is the architect in your project?

2. How much time and effort has the architect put into winning your business and earning your confidence?

3. How busy is the architect?

4. What do you feel sets this architect apart from the rest?

5. How well does the architect respond to being asked why you should hire them over someone else?

6. How well do your thoughts on why this architect may be the best fit for your church line up with their answer on why you should hire them?

7. How well has the architect performed in bringing projects to completion within the proposed budget on other projects?

8. How well does the architect understand your goals, priorities and constraints?

9. How good of a personality fit do you feel you have with the architect?

10. Does the architect have an "all or nothing" attitude towards the proposed services, or are they willing to offer services "a la carte" to help you meet your budget?

11. Are the agreements and pricing for services straightforward and easy to understand?

12. How well has the architect responded to your questions and communications in a timely and accurate fashion?

It is recommended you create a form (or several) with all the questions allowing each person on the evaluation team to rank each respondent's response on a scale of 1-10. If possible, visit the projects the architect has used as references for their services. This will provide an objective valuation for each applicant that should weigh heavily in the final decision and help eliminate personal feelings and preferences.

If you need any kind of information this topic click here : Top Miami architects

[admhawthorne]

The Noise

You guys! I wrote a short story that is original. It’s all mine. :-) Please let me know what you think.

The Noise

The first time I noticed the noise, I thought it was my neighbors. They have an eight year old who thinks it’s great fun to use our shared wall as their personal music factory, but, after a couple of days of the noise happening off and on, I realized it was much too delicate for it to be from the nuisance next door.

It was a small, squeak of a noise, not much louder than a can of soda being opened, but far more gravely in timbre. At night when I was finishing up my daily routine before bed, I could just make it out every so often, but, always, the noise drifted in the background of the natural white noise an apartment possesses.

When the weekend came, I decided to clean the apartment, which was something I admittedly don’t do as often as I should, but, as I started to sweep, I heard the noise again. This time, it was a touch louder. I stopped sweeping. The noise stopped.

I started sweeping. The noise happened again. I realized it sounded as though it was coming from behind my sofa. Battling between curious and terrified, I began to sweep again, and this time I intentionally swept toward my sofa. The noise increased. It was the loudest I’d ever heard it.

It began to sound like a small snarl. If I’d had a cat, I might have assumed it was my pet growling at me in warning that I was too close, but I didn’t. The only thing close to pets I had in my home were the dust bunnies living under the furniture.

I stopped sweeping. The noise lowered in volume, but continued.

Standing in front of my sofa with my broom in hand, I asked myself just exactly how much I wanted to know what was making this noise. On one hand, I was completely convinced something was under my sofa. On the other hand, so far nothing had killed me in my sleep, and the noise was fairly hair-raising. Maybe, if I left it alone and convinced myself I’d never figured out there was something under my sofa, I could continue on living my life.

Of course, there was no way I wasn’t going to constantly have the thought, “Holy shit, there is something living under my sofa, and it growls,” running around my mind all day, every day until I figured out what was making the noise. Now that I knew, there wasn’t really any turning back. So, I had to make a decision.

Move the sofa and see what’s back there.

Leave the apartment, change my identity, and move to a different country.

Considering I had negative ten dollars in my bank account, and I’d just been paid yesterday, option number two wasn’t going to happen.

Steeling my nerves and taking the broom to use as a makeshift weapon in one hand, I crept to the side of the sofa. The noise increased with my movements. As I reached for the back of the piece of furniture to begin slowly pushing it away from the wall, the growl became a snarl.

I panicked. I took a few quick steps backwards and collided with my kitchen cabinets. With only 500 square feet of living space, there really wasn’t anywhere to hide, let alone run. I found myself pinned to the side of the cabinet as I stared at the back of the sofa where it was now a few inches away from the wall.

Should I move it? Should I not? Should I step outside, burn everything to the ground, and claim the renter’s insurance?

Once again, my mental plans were squashed by my practicality. The insurance claim would take far too long to come in for it to do me any good. I had negative ten dollars, which means I needed a place to sleep, and a burned down, shell of an apartment with a maybe-creature who would, no doubt, be very pissed off I’d burned it’s home down sleeping somewhere near me was probably a bad idea.

Was it a rat? We really weren’t known to have rats in my area. Do rats growl? I was certain they hissed. I considered calling the front office to have them have someone come out, but it was already late. The office was closed, and I absolutely had to know what was behind my sofa. There was no way I was going to be able to sleep in my home until I knew what was making the noise and could assure myself it wasn’t something that would kill me in my sleep.

Swallowing down the rising panic, I stepped back to the sofa. The noise crescendoed. I held my broom in front of me, and, in one swift motion, quickly pushed the sofa away from the wall to discover the noise was coming from…

A hallucination.

It had to be a hallucination. That was the only explanation for what my eyes were seeing. Finally, the stress of working a low paying job with mandatory overtime had gotten to me, and I had at last lost what little mind I had left.

There was a creature living under my sofa. It wasn’t a rat or a mouse or even cat. A cat I would’ve believed, but this? This wasn’t real. There was no way this could be real.

The creature made a tight circle with its small, lithe, reptilian like body, and I watched in confused awe as the color of its scales shimmered between a deep ocean blue and black. It was no larger than my shoe, and its eyes gleamed a vibrant shade of green that well accented the blue of its body.

It hissed at me but made no indication it was going to run. I was too dumbfounded to so much as poke it with my broom. We stared at each other for a tense moment, and then it sucked in a deep breath before opening its mouth and speaking.

“So, are you going to ask me what I’m doing here, or what?”

“OH MY FUCKING GOD, YOU CAN TALK?!” I hadn’t meant to sound like a crazed lunatic, but, when a tiny reptilian creature asks you in a smooth, feminine, alto voice if you’re going to ask them what they’re doing under your sofa, intentions go out the window.

Its eyes narrowed at me. “Clearly.”

“What the fuck? What the actual fuck, man? Who the fuck…? I mean, what EVEN is going on here? What the fuck?” I couldn’t stop myself from blabbering.

It snorted at me and rolled its eyes. “You’ve already said that.”

I could feel my brain starting to break. “ARE YOU EVEN REAL?”

As best as I could tell, it shrugged at me. “Real is relative, but, if you’re asking me if I exist within the confines of what you know as reality, then, yes, I’m real, although I’m not very happy about that fact, if I’m perfectly honest with you.”

“How…” The broom fell with a loud clack onto my faux wooden floor. “I don’t understand.” I slowly followed my broom, landing on my behind with my legs sort of out in front of me. “You… are… what are you?”

“Oh, well,” it finally unfurled from the circle it’d made of itself upon first being revealed and sauntered over on its four legs to stop and sit on its haunches directly in front of me, “I’m not entirely sure how your kind classify things in this dimension, but I believe the term ‘dragon’ works.”

“Oh my god,” I stared down at the little creature and slowly blinked a few times. “Okay, so… yeah, there’s a dragon living under my sofa…. Who can talk, and…” I took in a deep breath as I tried to calm down, “who has just confirmed the theory regarding multiple dimensions.” I slowly shook my head back and forth. “Yup,” everything was clear now, “it’s official,” I knew exactly what I had to do, “I have lost my mind.”

“No, you haven’t,” it irritatedly replied, “but, if you keep this up, I might lose mine.” Rolling its eyes, it lifted a front claw and waved it dismissively around. “Look, I thought that, if I made warning noises, you’d just leave me alone until I could figure out how to get home, but, clearly, that didn’t work, so, since you know I’m here now, how about you help me get back home?”

I stared at it in disbelief. “And how, exactly, would I do that? Wave a magic wand and open a portal?”

“Pffft, no, don’t be ridiculous.” It rolled its eyes at me again. “You’re nowhere near a trained enough witch to use a wand.”

“Are… are you saying magic is real? Wait… hold on a second,” I held a hand up and pointed a finger frantically at myself. “Are you saying I’m a witch?”

The little creature took in a calming breath and let it out slowly as if mentally counting to ten. “Yeah, okay, so this is obviously going to take some time. How about you cook us some dinner, and I’ll start from the top because I really thought you knew more about, well, you than you do. I mean, do you think a dragon would show up at just anyone’s house?” It snorted at me. “No, of course not. Dragons show up where there’s magic. It’s just that, usually, we show up in a dimension where magic is a thing and not just something people use as deus ex machina in stories and videogames.”

I slowly closed my eyes and tried to pull in my panic. My therapist had recommended breathing exercises the last time I’d seen her. Now seemed like a good time to give them a try. After a few moments of calmly centering myself, I opened my eyes to find the creature… the dragon …staring intently at me.

“I like beef,” it said pointedly.

“OH MY GOD, fine.” With a huff, I pushed up from the ground, grabbed my broom, and turned to walk into the kitchen. “Of course, in my insanity, I’ve dreamed up a creature who is just as demanding as I am.”

“First of all, I’m real,” it shouted up at me before climbing the side of my cabinet to sit at the bar as I started to cook. “Second of all, what would you prefer? Puff, the magic dragon?”

“No, I’m allergic to pot,” I grumbled while I dug around for a pan.

“Man,” the dragon shot back with sincere sorrow, “sucks to be you, and how weird is that? Who’s ever heard of someone being allergic to marijuana?”

I grunted at it. “Yeah, because that’s the weirdest thing that’s ever happened to me.”

It laughed, and the noise was somewhere between a growl and hiss. “Good point.”

[livingcorner]

Tips on starting a community garden

STARTING A COMMUNITY GARDEN

This fact sheet is designed to give many different groups the basic information they need to get their gardening project off the ground. These lists are in no way meant to be complete. Each main idea will probably trigger more questions, so an assortment of ways to carry out that idea are presented; pick and choose those that seem to apply to your own situation.

FORM A PLANNING COMMITTEE

You're reading: Tips on starting a community garden

Determine if there really is a need and desire for a garden

What kind of garden–vegetable, flower, trees, a combination?

Who will the garden serve–kids, seniors, special populations,people who just want an alternative to trash?

If the project is meant to benefit a particular group or neighborhood, it is essential that the group be involved in all phases

Organize a meeting of interested people

Choose a well-organized garden coordinator

Form committees to accomplish tasks: Funding & Resource Development; Youth Activities; Construction; Communication.

Approach a sponsor. A sponsor is an individual or organization that supports a community garden. Site sponsorship can be a tremendous asset. Contributions of land, tools, seeds, fencing, soil improvements or money are all vital to a successful community garden. Some community gardens can provide most of their provisions through fees charged to the membership; but for many, a garden sponsor is essential. Churches, schools, citizens groups, private businesses, local parks and recreation departments are all potential supporters. Community Development Block Grants are sometimes available through your municipality.

Make a list of what needs to be done

Find a garden site

Obtain lease or agreement from owner

Decide on a mailing address and central telephone number(s). Try to have at least 3 people who are very familiar with all pertinent information. Form a telephone tree

If your community garden has a budget, keep administration in the hands of several people.

Choose a name for the garden

CHOOSE A SITE

Identify the owner of the land

Make sure the site gets at least 6 full hours of sunlight daily(for vegetables)

Do a soil test in the fall for nutrients & heavy metals

Consider availability of water

Try and get a lease or agreement which allows the space to be used at least for 3 years

Consider past uses of the land. Is there any contamination?

Is insurance something you need to consider?

PREPARE AND DEVELOP THE SITE

Clean the site

Develop your design

Gather your resources–try to gather free materials

Organize volunteer work crews

Plan your work day

Decide on plot sizes, mark plots clearly with gardeners names

Include plans for a storage area for tools and other equipment, as well as a compost area

Have a rainproof bulletin board for announcing garden events and messages

Arrange for land preparation–plowing, etc–or let gardeners do their own prep

Will the garden be organic?

Lay out garden to place flower or shrub beds around the visible perimeter. This helps to promote good will with non-gardening neighbors, passersby, and municipal authorities.

HOW SHOULD THE GARDEN BE ORGANIZED?

Are there conditions for membership (residence, dues, agreement with rules)?

How will plots be assigned (by family size, by residency, by need, by group- i.e., youth, elderly, etc.)?

How large should plots be (or should there be several sizes based on family size or other factors?

How should plots be laid out?

If the group charges dues, how will the money be used? What services, if any, will be provided to gardeners in return?

Will the group do certain things cooperatively (such as turning in soil in the spring, planting cover crops, or composting)?

When someone leaves a plot, how will the next tenant be chosen?

How will the group deal with possible vandalism?

Will there be a children’s plot?

Will the gardeners meet regularly? If so, how often and for what purposes?

Will gardeners share tools, hoses, and other such items?

How will minimum maintenance (especially weeding) be handled both inside plots and in common areas (such as along fences, in flower beds, and in sitting areas)?

Will there be a set of written rules which gardeners are expected to uphold? If so, how will they be enforced?

Should your group incorporate and consider eventually owning your garden site?

INSURANCE

It is becoming increasingly difficult to obtain leases from landowners without public liability insurance. Garden insurance is a new thing for many insurance carriers and their underwriters are reluctant to cover community gardens. It helps if you know what you want before you start talking to agents. Two tips: you should probably be working with an agent from a firm which deals with many different carriers (so you can get the best policy for your needs) and you will probably have better success with one of the ten largest insurance carriers, rather than smaller ones.

SETTING UP A NEW GARDENING ORGANIZATION

Read more: 9 Sure Ways to Get Rid of Snails and Slugs in Your House and Garden

Many garden groups are organized very informally and operate successfully. Leaders “rise to the occasion” to propose ideas and carry out tasks. However, as the work load expands, many groups choose a more formal structure for their organization.

A structured program is a means to an end. It is a conscious, planned effort to create a system so that each person can participate fully and the group can perform effectively. It’s vital that the leadership be responsive to the members. Structure will help an organization to last; it will promote trust; it will help your group grow and create new opportunities for leaders to develop.

If your group is new, have several planning meetings to discuss your program and organization. Try out suggestions raised at these meetings and after a few months of operation, you’ll be in a better position to develop bylaws or organizational guidelines. A community garden project should be kept simple as possible, whether large or small.

By laws are rules which govern the internal affairs of an organization. They are required when you form a non-profit corporation, but are useful even if your group is a club or a group of neighbors. Many battles are won simply because one side has more pieces of paper to wave than the other. It’s helpful to look over bylaws from other similar organizations if you are incorporating. Guidelines and Rules (see TROUBLESHOOTING for examples) are less formal than Bylaws, and are often adequate enough for a garden group that has no intention of incorporating.

ORGANIZATIONAL CONSIDERATIONS:

What is your purpose? What are your short and long-term objectives?

How are decisions to be made? Who chooses leaders and how?

How will work be shared? Who does what?

How will you raise money? Membership dues, fund raising, grants, sponsors?

Are you open to change? Flexibility is important when goals and members change.

Do you want to be incorporated or act as a club?

WHAT GOES INTO FORMAL BYLAWS:

Full official name of organization and legal address.

The purpose, goals and philosophy of the organization.

Membership categories and eligibility requirements.

Membership dues, how much and when paid.

Specify when and how often regular or special meetings of the membership are to be held, as well as regular and annual meetings of the board of directors.

State what officers are necessary, how they are chosen, length of term, their duties and how vacancies are filled.

State special committees, their purpose and how they operate.

Establish a system so that bylaws can be rescinded or amended, maybe by a simple majority.

State any official policies or practices:eg. garden group will avoid the use of hazardous substances; group will agree to keep all adjacent sidewalks in good repair and free of ice and snow in season; group will make all repairs necessary to keep equipment, fences and furniture in good order and repair.

Include a Hold Harmless clause (sample): “We the undersigned members of the (name) garden group hereby agree to hold harmless (name owner) from and against any damage, loss, liability, claim, demand, suit, cost and expense directly or indirectly resulting from, arising out of or in connection with the use of the (name) garden by the garden group, its successors, assigns, employees, agents and invites.”

HOW TO MANAGE YOUR COMMUNITY GARDEN

In order to offer a high quality community garden program, good management techniques are essential. Included in this fact sheet are the main ideas to consider in management, along with many different ways to carry them out. Having written rules is very important with older groups as well as new gardens, since they spell out exactly what is expected of a gardener. They also make it much easier to eliminate dead wood should the need arise.

Sample Guidelines and Rules — Some may be more relevant to vegetable gardens than to com munity flower gardens or parks. Pick and choose what best fits your situation.

I will pay a fee of $______ to help cover garden expenses. I understand that ___ of this will be refunded to me when I clean up my plot at the end of the season.

I will have something planted in the garden by (date) and keep it planted all summer long.

If I must abandon my plot for any reason, I will notify the manager.

I will keep weeds down and maintain the areas immediately surrounding my plot if any.

If my plot becomes unkempt, I understand I will be given 1 week’s notice to clean it up. At that time, it will be reassigned or tilled in.

I will keep trash and litter cleaned from the plot, as well as from adjacent pathways and fences.

I will participate in the fall clean-up of the garden. I understand that the $____ deposit will be refunded only to those who do participate.

I will plant tall crops where they will not shade neighboring plots.

I will pick only my own crops unless given permission by the plot user.

I will not use fertilizers, insecticides or weed repellents that will in any way affect other plots.

I agree to volunteer_____hours toward community gardening efforts. (include a list of volunteer tasks which your garden needs).

I will not bring pets to the garden.

I understand that neither the garden group nor owners of the land are responsible for my actions. I THEREFORE AGREE TO HOLD HARMLESS THE GARDEN GROUP AND OWNERS OF THE LAND FOR ANY LIABILITY , DAMAGE, LOSS OR CLAIM THAT OCCURS IN CONNECTION WITH USE OF THE GARDEN BY ME OR ANY OF MY GUESTS.

TROUBLESHOOTING

Vandalism is a common fear among community gardeners. However, the fear tends to be much greater than the actual incidence. Try these proven methods to deter vandalism:

Make a sign for the garden. Let people know to whom the garden belongs and that it is a neighborhood project.

Fences can be of almost any material. They serve as much to mark possession of a property as to prevent entry, since nothing short of razor-wire and landmines will keep a determined vandal from getting in. Short picket fences or turkeywire will keep out dogs and honest people.

Create a shady meeting area in the garden and spend time there.

Invite everyone in the neighborhood to participate from the very beginning. Persons excluded from the garden are potential vandals.

Involve the neighborhood children in learning gardens. They can be the garden’s best protectors. (see below.)

Plant raspberries, roses or other thorny plants along the fence as a barrier to fence climbers.

Make friends with neighbors whose window overlook the garden. Trade them flowers and vegetables for a protective eye.

Harvest all ripe fruit and vegetables on a daily basis. Red tomatoes falling from the vines invite trouble.

Plant potatoes, other root crops or a less popular vegetable such as kohlrabi along the sidewalk or fence. Plant the purple varieties of cauliflower and beans or the white eggplant to confuse a vandal.

Plant a “vandal’s garden” at the entrance. Mark it with a sign: “If you must take food, please take it from here.

CHILDREN’S PLOTS

Children included in the garden process become champions of the cause rather than vandals of the garden. Therefore your garden may want to allocate some plots specifically for children. The “children’s garden” can help market your idea to local scout troops, day cares, foster grandparent programs, church groups, etc.

Consider offering free small plots in the children’s garden to children whose parents already have a plot in the garden.

PEOPLE PROBLEMS AND SOLUTIONS

Angry neighbors and bad gardeners pose problems for a community garden. Usually the two are related. Neighbors complain to municipal governments about messy, unkempt gardens or rowdy behavior; most gardens can ill afford poor relations with neighbors, local politicians or potential sponsors. Therefore, choose bylaws carefully so you have procedures to follow when members fail to keep their plots clean and up to code. A well-organized garden with strong leadership and committed members can overcome almost any obstacle.

Read more: How to Fix a Leaking Outdoor Faucet

RESOURCES

Horticultural information:

Cooperative Extension Service in your county Women’s Garden Club Federation, Men’s Garden Clubs, Horticultural Societies, Garden Centers

Seeds:

America the Beautiful Fund, 219 Shoreham Building, Washington D.C.

Bedding plants:

Local nurseries or Vocational-Tech Horticulture Department High school Horticulture classes

Publications Free to ACGA Members Fact Sheets and articles on the following are available free of charge to ACGA members:

Creating Community Gardens– A Handbook for Planning and Creating Community Gardens to Beautify and Enhance Cities and Towns. Second Edition, Minnesota Green. An excellent source of info on planning and implementation of greening projects.

Agreement for Community Gardening Sample Form

Garden Planning for City Lots Basic site evaluation, large print* Liability Insurance

Fundraising — Theme issue of the Journal of the Land Trust Alliance EXCHANGE magazine

How to Form a 501c(3) -is it necessary?

Research Agenda-suggested topics for further research (monograph)

Community Gardening Survey

Community Gardening bibliography of related articles and publications

Case Studies of Entrepreneurial Community Greening Projects (monograph)

| Children’s Gardens| Fun Page|Take a Survey| Research| KinderGARDEN|

Source: https://livingcorner.com.au Category: Garden

source https://livingcorner.com.au/tips-on-starting-a-community-garden/

[sandloading743]

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Notes

Diana Joy Leonard sang this song while growing up. She wrote me 'I was born in 1982 and grew up in NYC... This song replaces 'eenie meenie miney moe' for making 'decisions', i.e. point to one of the options for each word until you get to the end.' Another New Yorker wrote: '...growing up in NYC, queens to be specific, my sisters and I used to sing this song as a hand clapping game, with the following additional verses...' I saw you last night with your boyfriend How do you know I was peaking through the key hole Nosy I didn't wash the dishes Lazy I didn't wash up Funky I jumped out the window You must be crazy That's why they call me... Eenie meenie sicileeny, Ooh ah zambalini, Achi cachi Liberache, I love you, Take a peach, Take a plum, Take a stick of bubble gum, Not a peach, Not a plum, Not stick of bubble gum. ***** Amy wrote, 'I am a born and bred Wisconsinite (at age 18 just now), and that was one of my favorite counting-out rhymes. We put our feet in a circle and used that chant (and several others) to choose who would be 'it' for games of tag or hide and seek. However, our version went a bit differently, and I thought you might be interested in seeing it. Eeny, meany, tortellini Beep, bop, bopellini Etchy-sketchy, liver-etchy I like you. Take a peach, take a plum Take a stick of chewing gum Stick it here, stick it there Stick it in your teacher's hair No more school, no more books No more teachers' dirty looks Yeah.

[stone-man-warrior]

May 2, 2021: 3:01 pm:

==========================================

Poison injection horrible rash attack update:

Photo was taken at about 2:50 pm on 5-2-2021 ... a few minuted ago.

There is absence of healing.

The condition has been that way, slightly changing over time, since mid February.

The poison substance, there is no doubt, was some kind of acid. I don’t know what kind of acid. It’s not battery acid as I first suspected, as my clothing would have been shredded around the wound area, and the clothing is not shredded.

I know it was/is acid because I was able to neutralize the acid by  drinking some baking soda with water over the past few days. That immediately changed the way the rash and especially the pain, is affecting me.

After a few days, and a total of about ten teaspoons of baking soda at a rate of one teaspoon mixed with six ounces of water, give or take some ,,,, the pain of burning flesh is gone. I still feel a little bit of burning from the acid after I massage my leg and it gets stirred around within, but only a tiny bit compared to the incredible acid burn I have been subject to over the past two months and more.

Baking soda neutralizes acid.

I bought and consumed some baking soda in anticipation of neutralizing the acid that was injected into my leg in February. Maybe another six or three teaspoons of baking soda, and all of the acid, I suspect, will have been neutralized.

There is absence of healing, increase in swelling, but I am able to tolerate the use of the neo-sporin now. Before, the pain was unbearable with application of neo-sporin.

It’s been since Wednesday that I started the Baking Soda treatment, and since Friday that I felt I could tolerate the neo-sporin.

Only three days of neo-sporin has produced dramatic results as far as the amount of poisons that are oozing out of those wounds. The poisons are dripping out of my leg at all of the wounds now.

Big problem is that the poisons are heavy, gravity takes the poison down into my foot, and it settles in my toes. It’s very difficult to get the poisons out of the toes and into the open wound so it can drain out, and is very painful to massage the area in effort to produce drainage.

At the Walgreen‘s on Wednesday, I defended against many terror soldiers, and of all of the fighting I can recall having to do, that day at Walgreens was the bloodiest fight I can remember, there was blood everywhere at the pharmacy counter by the time I left the store.

While fighting there, I was subject to more ground up glass dust shards that were blown into my eyes by the terror bastard bitch that works the pharmacy counter there. I have a lot of glass shards in my eyes again now, is very painful, makes vision difficult and blurry, in addition to the poisons that are still leaking out of my eyes also.

The terror bastard at the Walmart my last visit there, broke my toe, so, I have compound injury there with the swelling, the poison, and now the toe is broken too.

“Chip away at the stone” terror is when the terror army makes small objectives to cause repeated injury to a marked victim for COVID attack. I am being subject to much “Chip away at the stone” terror techniques.

There are no doctors in Oregon. The hospitals are controlled, occupied, by the terror army. US Citizens are drawn to the hospitals with COVID bullshit. The terror army uses repeated poisonings and attack to produce injury in effort to draw  victims to a hospital where they are killed, but the hospital bills the insurance as a cover, and as a profit center.

There are no records of any one having been killed, the victims are replaced with imposters who take their places at the victims home, and prey on extended family of the hospitalized/murdered US Citizen victims.

Please send help.

==============

4:07 pm:

As I keep saying, the command orders for advancing the terror army with marching orders and updates is done mostly by major news media accounts on Twitter, by famous and “trusted” news media personalities.

I want to advise, in absence of taking Twitter offline as is required to preserve USA, to watch for more news about the “shortage of chips”, “shortage of semiconductors” and so on.

I suggest those stories be looked at as instructions to the terror army to do what has been done to me, small, repeated, relentless attack over time in effort to cause injury, pain, physical need to see a doctor, and also, includes financial hardship attack methods. All in effort to weaken the marked victims, while at the same time, such “Chip Away at the Stone” terror tactics is done in a way that minimizes danger or exposure to the terror army soldiers. They are able to strike with minimal risk while producing damage to the marked victims, each repeated blow causes more compounded injury and hardship to the US Citizens while the Canadian terror army soldiers and their SAG media commanders enjoy safety and are not subject to COVID or Corona Virus related hardship in any way, they are not subject to financial hardship because all of the army’s supplies, housing, food, clothing, transportation and every other thing is all paid for, supplied by the SAG media leadership, including the very best medical health treatment,

Please send help.

Shut down Twitter in order to stop the terror, there is no other way,

============

6:18 pm:

Public Safety Announcement:

I have no doubt that many other people have been attacked with the injection of acid as I was attacked. It’s important to me, that I also remind readers about what I remember about the night that I was attacked in my home, and the revealing evidence that you can see for yourself in the photos I have shared here during this difficult and painful time, and that is there were two poisons injected into my leg with one, single weapon that seems to have been developed specifically for injecting double poison simultaneously. The way the weapon looked in the dark, and in motion as I was repeatedly struck with it, is that I can somehow associate the way the weapon operated was similar to the way a staple hammer operates. The kind of thing I am thinking about is a tool used by roofing installers, and others who need to staple felt paper to a roof, or for stapling underlayment siding vapor barrier on a wall. The weapon was longer, was not exactly a staple hammer, but what I did see seemed to operate the same way, except rather than drive a staple upon impact, the thing had syringes inside, each impact injected TWO kinds of poison side by side, and the initial wounds were a pair of very small holes in the skin, spaced about one-half to three-quarters of an inch apart from one another, each hole is where a needle impaled the skin, and is where the poisons were injected. The assailant seemed to know how to place the impact such that the poison would run down the tendon or muscle that is central on the shin, and the assailant seems to have known that the poison substance is heavy, and will move down with gravity, eating away at the muscle tissue with gravity, thus, the poison has created a number of channels within my leg, places where the poison has made it’s own river bed with witch to travel as I change my position from standing, to sitting, to laying down. The poison repeatedly followed the same paths within my leg, destroying tissue over time, such that when I stand up after laying down, I can feel the liquid poison move down my leg within. I feels as though a nest of pinch bugs is moving around inside my leg... very creepy.

So, TWO kinds of poisons.

I only know for sure that one at least, is acid of some kind, an acid that is heavy and eats flesh, but does not eat the blood vessels.

I don‘t know what the other poison is.

The Public Service Announcement I want to make to others who may have been attacked this same way is that, as mentioned, baking soda neutralizes acid, and  when I mixed it with some water and drank it, the result was immediate relief from some of the pain within about four hours, and as I used more baking soda, it was clear to me that I was doing the right thing, the pain decreased by 90%. Today, the acid pain is only minimal, and only happens when I elevate my leg to get some of the poison out of my foot and to move it towards the open wounds so it will leak out.

What I need to say, is DO NOT PUT THE BAKING SODA INTO THE WOUND!

Trust me, it was a bad idea to put the baking soda directly onto the open sores. That shit hurt as bad as the acid did when I did it, so, just drink some with water, it only takes a few teaspoons over a three day time to see and feel remarkable results.

Don‘t go to the hospital if you are attacked this way. If you get attacked with the injection of acid, that means your local medical facilities are in control of the Canadian terror army, and that is the reason for the injection, they need the victims to be at the hospital, that way, the terror army has many options to say why you died, or to keep your death secret, and just replace you with impostor. Once in the hospital, the terror army actors will tell you that you have some terminal ailment, and they will advise that you call your family to come to the hospital.

They will kill and replace your whole family, and, bill the insurance for a profit.

Don‘t put the baking soda on the wound, mix one teaspoon with a cup of water and drink it three times per day for three days. After that, use half teaspoon as needed with water.

Please send help.

[cenquitranin1973]

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The Best Colorado Home Insurance Companies 2020: Why should anyone shop for homeowners insurance in Colorado? While it’s possible for a company to “self-insure”, the only time it’s warranted to be in a situation where it does so is if the customer has made the initial decision to cancel. When a company does decide to stay in business, many people who haven’t renewed their homeowner’s policy do so for the sake of renewals. However, after an initial cancellation, the business can no longer make any claims of any kind. As stated above, if you don’t renew the policy, then you will no longer be protected. It is also very important to be aware of the various discounts offered by homeowners’ insurance agents. These discounts may reflect the savings, in terms of the monthly cost, while also save some money. What kind of discount is available to you? When considering discounts, it is important to understand what type of policy is required in your state.

The top renters insurance companies of 2020

The top renters insurance companies of 2020* ** The average cost to insure a new personal auto is $2,727 according to AAA’s 2020 rates, but new auto insurance isn’t cheap — you need to really look for ways to offset the high cost of your premium. Consider: The average cost to insure a brand-new, leased car with full coverage is $3,764 per year, or $79 per month. You can save more by bundling your renters insurance policy with your auto insurance. This means if you have a car loan and want just the insurance, you’ve made the right choice for yourself — but if a little extra money hasn’t been spent on bills that might leave you without everything you need to live a luxury lifestyle, consider renting instead of owning your home. A significant chunk of premium payments have to do with your personal property protection, which is important coverage for when you’re making significant payments to an auto insurer like yours. Even if the state.

The Best New York Renters Insurance Companies 2020

The Best New York Renters Insurance Companies 2020 If you are using your home office space for your business you may want to start comparing and contrast some of the available renters insurance companies. You should be able to go with their best options and their cost. We also want to thank you for choosing our insurance company. You and your property and personal insurance policy can have a profound impact on your personal finances. Some of your most valuable possessions — your personal belongings, electronics and food — are most likely in high-risk pools. As the largest property, personal property, liability and liability coverage is an essential part of your property insurance program. This coverage will protect you against financial hardship in the case of an accident or theft. Renters insurance policies may provide other coverage such as property and liability coverage, general liability or medical coverage (if any). The key here is to get you covered. Renters insurance policies can help you protect your home and personal property when disaster strikes. The best renters insurance is one that is appropriate for your needs at a price you.

Best Renters Insurance in Georgia

Best Renters Insurance in Georgia These policies can be difficult to find and much more expensive than others. It can be very confusing what your policy’s included in the price. Some of these policies are designed for their specific needs and they usually cost thousands of dollars a year. However, if you own a home you will need insurance on an older home. They may also be the only option you have to get home protection. They also often have more comprehensive coverage but may cost a bit more. You should have any coverage you need for older homes. Also the more that you are considering purchasing, the higher the cost of insurance. The state of Georgia is considered a no-fault state. This means that your insurance should pay for the costs incurred as you are responsible for your own damages due to an accident. For instance, if you were in an auto accident causing $15,000 in damage to your vehicle, your insurance company would not have to pay for the damages to you. You also don’t.

Insurance by state

Insurance by state StateMotorists Insurance (CIM) Cost SavingsUninsured Motorists $3,913$4,543$3,883$3,942$4,545$4,548$4,868$2,038$2,062$1,984$2,058$2,033$1,986$10,844$5,838$4,868$5,724$9,837$6,638$5,713$6,717$7,087$7,071$7,063$4,744$5,836$6,744$6,749$6,826$7,090$9,071$9,047$9,076$9,042$9,068$9,083$9,086$7,078$9,08.

Insurance types

Insurance types The average car insurance rates are in the millions (and has), making it a crucial piece to consider when shopping around for your new policy. While rates are generally lower for young drivers (even teens), states with older drivers to make up for this smaller price. Some insurers have cut prices in every decade since the 1980s, so you can’t predict just how much your coverage will cost. We pulled the average price from several major providers and ranked it by the most affordable $1,000,000 on average, based on coverage amounts ranging from $2,500 to $10,000. A high 1.2% decrease on average is a good indicator that your new policy will cost less, but is that being true? Insurance companies calculate premiums with some modifications to get a better sense of a policy: state minimum requirements change how much you pay for coverage; for example, you’ll be required to insure your car with $50,000 worth of coverage and pay a.

[allthislove]

I’m not proud of myself.

Today, I finally blew up at my roommate- soon to be former roommate. For me, it had been a long time coming. Living with her hasn’t exactly been a walk in the park. Though she stays gone much of the time, usually not coming home before 9 or 10 PM and leaving before 8 AM, when she is home, she treats the apartment like it’s her domain. You ever met someone who wants everything done their way, or it’s a problem? She’s this way.

She’s belittling, undermining, and controlling... and per our conversation today, and the last time we had a big discussion like this a month ago, manipulative. (She loves to turn my complaints around on me, or twist the conversation into me somehow being in the wrong.)

Here’s the thing. She isn’t a bad person. In fact, I think if we hadn’t ever lived together, we could’ve been friends. She and I enjoy some of the same things, and she has a jovial attitude, when she’s... not in her “do as I say” mode. 

The major problem is that she just sees herself as the boss of the apartment. I believe she sees it as her apartment, and I’m just the person she let live with her. It’s my fault, though. For one, when we secured the apartment last summer, I hadn’t yet moved up to Brooklyn and had no intention of doing so until my semester started at NYU. So, she actually found the place (which is nice, but is in an area I hate), and she moved into it before me (though we signed the lease at the same time, and I paid rent and all deposits even before I got there.) I was assured that these things wouldn’t be a problem, but they were. The first few months I lived there, I felt like a guest. Not like.... she was treating me with hospitality and with courtesy. Like, I was a person invading space that belonged to her. Space that I paid equal rent and utilities for, mind you.

Then, as time went on, she became more and more of a control freak. It was blaming me for not taking out trash or washing dishes, it was manipulative lies about “not feeling like I(she) should have to clean up after someone.” It was “I just feel like if you use my dishes and don’t wash them right after, it’s disrespectful.” When I moved in, she and her mother insisted that she had all the dishes and appliances we needed, and I didn’t have to buy anything. When I expressed discomfort with that idea, they assured me it would be fine. I knew it would become a problem, and it did. 

My biggest mistake, thought, was getting hooked up with her in the first place. Her family is friends with my aunt’s family. They knew we were both headed to New York around the same time, her for work, me for grad school, and everyone was suggesting to me that we should move in together. Something inside of me said that wasn’t a great idea, but I did it, anyway. It was convenient and I figured it couldn’t be a bother, because I was mostly focusing on school. Now, I’ve told the girl off, and my only worry is for my aunt’s relationship with her friend.

My final straw came today. I’m back home with my family, and my roommate, like she does, sent me a Venmo charge for the electric bill. Which is fine. What isn’t fine is that she kept sending me reminder notifications. Which she’s done in the past, which I’ve asked her not to do. Then, I texted her and asked her not to send me reminders. She responded “Please me then”. I don’t know what she meant by that, and I sort of think it was a typo meant to say “pay me then.” But either way, it was rude and ugly and my LAST STRAW. Mind you, I pay all of my bills on time. I pay other bills than the measly one(s) we share together. This bitch has been trying to mentally paint me as a deadbeat who doesn’t pay bills for M O N T H S, which is fucking annoying, because I PAY ALL OF MY BILLS ON TIME. I pay 1 credit card, 1 cell phone, 1 medical payment, 2 insurance bills, Hulu, Netflix, HBO Now... EVERY MONTH. Not including the rent, electricity, and internet we pay together. (Oh, I also sponsor a child every month.)

Now, this fucking electric bill. I have actually never seen the actual bill. I never see how much the fucking bill costs. I have never seen when it’s due. I just take her word for it when she sends me a Venmo charge. And I pay it. Usually not that exact second, because I DON’T HOP TO for anyone and it’s Venmo, and the bill is PAID to the company, which is what matters most- essentially, I’m just paying HER back for it. Which is actually not a mode I like, and I didn’t tell her to set it up this way, and I’d much rather send money directly to the electric company than pay her back, but whatever. Mind you, I asked her months ago to tell me WHEN the bill was due and how much it was so I could determine my half and pay it to her on my own. I don’t need anyone to remind me to pay bills. I’m actually adult af, I’ve been paying bills on my own for Y E A R S. She has never shown me a bill nor told me when it’s due. She also claims she Venmos me on the same day every month, which is patently false. 

So, yeah, usually by today (the 28th-ish of each month) I’d pay rent and electricity and internet at the same time (meaning I’d pay rent to the landlord, and pay this roommate over Venmo). 

So, anyway, she texted me “please me then.” Which was a fucking weird ass text. So, I text back “Wtf. How about you sent me an actual copy of the bill. This shit is annoying af.”

Then she called me. She called me, thinking she was gonna “Queen Mother” and manipulate me into submission. But little does she know, the week I left to come home (the day after my birthday, May 18), I vowed that she had ONE MORE TIME to try me. And she caught me on the right day. When she started out her mouth with her bullshit, I LET HER HAVE IT. I READ HER FOR FILTH. And she kept trying her manipulative “no, you’re the problem” bullshit, but every time she came out her mouth with some shit, I read her even more. She even tried some “I don’t see what’s the problem with reminding you about a bill that’s PAST DUE”, to which I said “HOLD UP, sis, I PAY MY BILLS ON TIME. And you never told me when this bill was due, EVEN WHEN I ASKED YOU TO, so don’t even start that bullshit.”

And, like... I’m happy that I stood up for myself, and let her know that I’m not her doormat, I’m not her underling, and I don’t need her nor answer to her, but I’m sad that it had to come to this. Because I know she’s going to cry to her mom, and it’s going to get back to her grandma, and then to MY AUNT, and it’s going to be a whole thing.

And I know she’s going to lie and say “my roommate never wanted to pay bills and stuck me with everything.” Because, she said similar things about previous roommates when we first moved in together. She said she’d had problems with roommates in the past. Which is a red flag. Which I ignored, because ... I don’t always trust my intuition. But I guarantee her problems with roommates in the past is because she’s a bossy, manipulative person who wants everything her way and thinks people are supposed to fall in line after her. Which... is not me. Could never be me. 

And, like, it SUCKS because my aunt is really good friends with her family. Like, besties with her grandma. And also, I’m NERVOUS about my social interactions with people, and never wanted to have a roommate because I think I end up making everyone hate me (which isn’t really true, but you know... the few bad times always stand out.) And, like, I have one more year at NYU, and I have to have one more year of having roommates, probably, and I’m really scared to have another situation like this. 

And New York City is so expensive that living by yourself is hard or impossible. Like, unless I find some kind of really well paying job that is willing to allow me time to finish my classes, getting a place by myself isn’t really an option, or is a very unlikely option. 

ALSO, I think living with her was so stressful it was making me physically sick, and making my body have really adverse stress reactions, so there’s that. (Seriously, like... I was having a lot of stress-related health issues that ARE GONE AND I’VE ONLY BEEN HOME A WEEK.)

So... anyway, if any of y’all read this and care... please wish me luck in finding comfortable, nice housing in a nice area so that my home life can be comfortable and my only stress can be finishing my thesis so I can graduate next spring. And please send me “great roommate” vibes! I’ve heard of so many people finding roommates that become like family, and I need that in my life....