#who does not move forward
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you are all I have, you are the eyes that see, the air that breathes, how can I worship anything else?
#john design is never going to be consistant he's an eldrich being ok? ok#malevolent#malevolent podcast#john#john doe#john malevolent#arthur#arthur lester#arthur malevolent#jarthur#private eyes#i guess#but itsITS MORE NUANCED THAN THAT OKAY#im havbing feelings about eldrich gods and worship and weird fucked up intimacy and love and friendship#and how can a god who has only been worshipped express that love in turn#how can something that was never raised or nurtured or loved born into a world of chaos with innate bloodlust ever progress if it is#not forgiven#how can a person adjust and live on if they are not allowed the space and decency to grow as such john failed yellow#HOW can you learn to move forwards. you must move forwards#anyway I <3 toxic codependency (in media) ok? ok
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i truly would not be mad if nancy breaks up with jonathan and tells steve to move on. and for vickie to tell robin she’s not interested but is willing to be friends. so nancy and robin decide they need to hang out after a long day of heartbreak and throughout their convos of explaining everything that’s been going on, they realize they have feelings for each other. i truly would not be mad at that. in fact, that’s exactly what i want to happen 😌
#ronance#robin buckley#nancy wheeler#stranger things#who cares what the straights will think#they’ll be like ‘oh but that doesn’t make sense plot wise’#actually it does!#there’s been theories nancy is queer since s1#and s4 left off with the jancy + stancy love triangle#have jonathan go to college & steve realize he needs to move on#he mentions crawling backwards as a kid so now have him crawl forward by having him get over nancy#and vickie is dating whoever that guy is and then just play off that scene between vickie & robin as robin’s pov where she thought vickie#was interested but she isn’t#then we have the foundation set up for nancy and robin to be together#they’re already friends#have them hang out and get into a deep convo#and robin trusts nancy so she tells her she’s a lesbian & vickie rejected her#and that’s when nancy shares that she feels like she’s always been attracted to girls#AND THEN THEY KISS AND RONANCE IS CANON#LIKE ITS SO EASY THEY NEED TO JUST FUCKING DO IT#no one cares for the straights. do what needs to be done for the gays and give us ronance 😁
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There are wayyy too many “Roy would NEVER say that, how ooc!!!” and inversely, “Roy Kent is now #canceled and I never want him to so much as look at Keeley ever again” takes and not nearly enough:
“Roy is a flawed human person whose insecurities have always plagued him and tonight they got the better of him once again. He has a lot of apologies to make but hey, tomorrow is another chance at greatness. Also, he should really really go to therapy :)” takes!
#Roy Kent#ted lasso#ted lasso spoilers#I saw sooo many tweets about how they will never support Roy with Keeley ever again like ?? from people who apparently shipped them before?#I think that’s taking it a bit far….#(and I don’t even want them back as a couple necessarily)#in addition to the ‘I’m going to say this extremely in character line was ooc because I love Roy’ crowd#like have y’all never heard of messing up before?#mistakes don’t make a man but how you move forward after making them does#isn’t that the whole thesis of the show?
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God this turned out way way better than I hoped....my pc Lune during their session 0 when they found a Totally Normal amulet just hanging from a tree randomly
#oc: lune#cassy draws#pwotr pals#'im going to stick to a more lined style moving forward' immediately does a completely lineless style#getting the hang of that lasso tool i'll tell u what it's actually neat. who knew
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Big fan of characters who are somewhat aware that they are side characters and they struggle with that
#that quiz made me think of idelle black sails#which made me think of wakaba rgu my best friend wakaba rgu#like idelle wins at the end right#and her 'you killed my friend' monologue is so good because it makes u think of her and that girl as actual people#and not just extras that the main cast can kill without affecting anyone#idelle knows shes no max no anne no eleanor but that doesnt make her any less of a person#and then theres wakaba who seems so detached from the weirdness of the duels and is 'just' normal#but then it gets turned around and u see how wakaba feels about the whole situation#ugh wakaba duel my beloved#and in the finale u see that wakaba has taken on the role of utena somewhat#which is crazy? like what does that mean#the world akio constructed is falling apart and the cast is starting to move forward and outside of the neverending cycle#and wakaba now goes from the normie friend to taking on utenas role as an active player?#is she simply redoing utenas story or something else
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Weegi woke me up in the middle of the night for the third night in a row because of course he did, the big baby, but I’m wibbly because I realized I met my fundraising goal for Peach in under 12 hours 🥺🥹😭❤️ I had her post queued up another two times and I was able to go delete those augh. Thank you to everyone who boosted and donated!! Here is another Peach picture to celebrate
#absolutely overwhelmed with gratitude and shock (positive)#I was sick to death with worry yesterday when we got the email with her prescription and the links of what to buy#really appreciate those who pointed out that insulin is more affordable in other ways also!!#we were overwhelmed and just bought exactly what they linked us to because we can’t move forward with her treatment until we have it#but if she does not go into remission then I know to look for more affordable options now#my ramblings
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You think I'm weak, don't you?
#i am very against the idea that the way wwx reacts to certain situations is because he chooses to ignore his pain and focus on others#i think while he does do that he is also somebody who is very optimistic#he chooses to not dwell on painful things and instead move forward#of course he hides his pain from others i know he does that but i think reducing him to just that feels wrong#he just knows he has to keep going and he chooses to do it with optimism and hopefulness#biggest example is him saying jc losing his core was the end of him but him losing it would be ok because he would find a way to live w it#in the book him losing control and being so shocked hits me so hard because he never gave up he just couldnt control it anymore#and i think even in the show him breaking down is heartbreaking because that is something he always chooses not to do#but when jyl dies that's it for him#i love him very much#this gifset changed so much while i was making it i hope it's good#wei wuxian#the untamed#the untamed edit#cql#cql edit#my gifs
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thing that makes me feral is its everyone else telling Jinx who she is
her friends end up dead and she's still got their voices in her head telling her who and what she is. Silco spends the rest of his life telling her who she is to him. one city is telling her shes a terrorist and the other that she's a savior. even Isha is the one who 'adopted' Jinx, deciding that they would have a relationship—Jinx just go to decide what that looks like
I don't even have a point to this, just. the relationship with Isha and the touching her shoulders scene could both be seen as moments of growth for Jinx—people rely on her, they trust her, they believe in her, and she seems to believe it for the first time since Vi returned—but they're also just more instances of other people telling her who she should be
#arcane#idk i kind of love that all those people touch her shoulders and walk away... and jinx immediately goes and does something else#like i'd have to analyze the visual language of that scene a lot more to know how the animators wanted that to read#but it was such a... everyone acknowledging you're just a figurehead#like good job. we appreciate you. we're moving forward#and Jinx definitely is hit by the gravity of the situation as well... and then leaves to go find Vi and deal with the Vander situation#of course thats because the big monster fight happens right after the shoulder touch scene and she IS fighting to defend the people#but theres two episodes where shes like alright. well. nevermind im slinking back into the shadows to deal with my family stuff now#and everything with Isha too!!#Isha is desperately trying to get Jinx to be the heroic figure everyone wants her to be and Jinx is NOT interested#and I can totally see Isha's death spurring Jinx on to let herself be this thing she didn't want to be#and I don't even know if that's necessarily bad it's just again other people telling her who she is!!#let Ekko be the figurehead leader of the rebellion where the hell is Ekko! he's in the opening credits so he can't possibly be dead so soon
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i have read a lot of criticisms of tlovm, particularly s3, and i've also read a lot of posts extolling its virtues. some of these posts i agree with, and some of them i don't. and as s3 rounds out, i've found myself needing to make an active choice about how i feel about this show as whole. i'm a deeply opinionated person, who cares and thinks a lot about narrative and the art of storytelling, and i find myself lacking many really strong opinions about tlovm, and i think i've finally figured out why.
tlovm is bonus content. tlovm is the icing on the cake. the perfect vox machina story already exists, and you can watch all 115 episodes (plus three one-shots) on youtube right now. i don't need or want tlovm to do what c1 did, bc c1 already did it! i've realized that i think of tlovm the way that i think of 4sd or the one-shots or the novels or any other ancillary piece of cr-related media: as ancillary media. it contributes to the overall story that i love, but it is not the core story itself.
BUT. this does not mean that tlovm is therefore exempt from criticism, or that i think that this show, as a show, is perfect and great and can't be improved upon. i have fun watching it, but i don't delude myself by thinking it's a rock-solid narrative. it's not. there are holes. there are things i'm confused by and i have infinitely more context than someone who watches tlovm and nothing else. the character development is severely lacking, and i would not understand the fandom's obsessive love of these seven characters if i had only ever watched this animated show. that's a problem. i think that in many ways, the cr team has done themselves and their groundbreaking storytelling efforts a disservice in the way they told this story in this medium.
and so i have to make a choice. i have to choose how i feel about this show, how much i love it, whether i get excited about it. and i've decided that i like this show. i don't love it, and tbqh, i won't be watching s3 again (or the other seasons) until right before s4 drops, as a refresher. this won't be something that i return to the way i return to the main campaigns. and that's okay. i'm not mad about it. i don't feel like my time has been wasted, and i don't feel like tlovm has in any way ruined my love for c1. i love the way that tlovm has reinvigorated the fandom, and i love talking with y'all and seeing everyone on my dash be excited for something new. i'm never gonna regret the existence of tlovm, but i'm also never gonna ask it to be something more than it is. i just don't think i care enough. i'm here for a good time, not a long time, and hey, each season isn't that long, so ig that works out. so as we head into the final 3 episodes of s3, i'm choosing to have fun with them, even the parts i don't like, even the parts i don't agree with, bc i love the people who made it and i love the community who watches and at the end of the day, it really ain't that serious.
#me#tlovm#tlovm s3#critical role#ONCE AGAIN#BC THIS IS THE INTERNET#I WILL REITERATE#THIS DOES NOT MEAN THAT I THINK PPL WHO DON'T LIKE THE SHOW ARE BAD OR DRAMATIC OR ANNOYING#AND THIS DOES NOT MEAN THAT I THINK POSTS ABOUT THE VERY REAL AND LEGITIMATE FLAWS OF THIS SHOW ARE A WASTE OF TIME#I AM TALKING ABOUT MY OWN PERSONAL RELATIONSHIP WITH THIS SHOW AND HOW I WILL BE MOVING FORWARD WITH IT EMOTIONALLY#I TRULY DON'T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT WHAT YOU DO OR DO NOT WATCH OR THINK OR FEEL#I HAVE A JOB I DON'T HAVE TIME TO CARE ABOUT THAT
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The Tower
DWC November 2024
Day 1: Haze/Sexy
OC: Lilliana Whitedawn, Sindorei 'Felblood'
(I never wrote about the fall of Dalaran, and there's a couple characters who have feelings about it, so now is as good of a time as ever.)
@daily-writing-challenge
It was early enough that the morning haze of fog still kissed the sea's gently rolling surface, as it lazily lapped at the shore – well-worn leather boots carrying the fair-haired Sin'dorei deftly along the damp sand of the beach. Her gaze swept the strewn rocks, and debris – still in shock. One moment, all was well – the club had been as it was every other day, or night... teeming with gyrating bodies – while wishes were fulfilled in the shadows of her insidiously sensual domain.
And then all the lights had come on, the music coming to an abrupt halt as the crushing press of flesh below began to blink out of the fog of pleasure and lust, the exits blazing with a soft, red-tinted arcane glow – the emergency features put in place long before her time had cut the party swiftly short, and... with relatively little harm done, security had escorted all those in attendance either out of Dalaran itself through portals, or back into the underbelly to make their own ways to safety, family, or whatever else called to them in these frantic, confused moments of invasion.
It had been so fast. One moment, bodies pressed hotly against one another – dark secrets traded for dangerous desires; drugs, alcohol, flesh, magic... or simply a release from the expectations of every day life... this was the legacy she'd been handed. The club she'd practically been shaped within, herself – the walls therein holding secrets the likes of which she'd no doubt have killed, to keep.
It was the one, big thing that had still tied her to those now forever gone from her life.
“Was it too much to ask for just this?”
The waves shushed her as gently as they could.
“Not only was a whole city I loved utterly destroyed – a symbol of what we can achieve with alliances, instead of war. A testament to our prowess over magic, and our ability to bring that power to everyone...”
What was she even trying to say? That not only did it hurt her, as an Elf... but that it felt like a knife in her gut. It felt personal. It felt like Ythgar leaving all over again. It felt like Iloam's goodbye, in which he had accused her of being a demon in disguise - in which he had told her to never speak to him or his again. It tasted like having had love at her fingertips, only to lose it over, and over again.
It was a whole era of her life being ripped away from her again.
It was an anchor to the young woman's humanity that had allowed her to not only stay rooted in a safer mindset, bound up in memories and legacy...but it had allowed Lily's demonic side to be sated in a convenient manner without causing anyone any real harm. It was a tie to a part of her life that had felt so safe, in the early days – a time that, despite the turmoil it had all ended in, had forced her to take shape in her first days truly on her own.
And so Lily let herself grieve there on the shore, by herself – she let herself grieve in a way she never really had had the time for, since all the loss. She'd been busy mourning herself – her mortality, and her fel corruption - and raising a daughter, and fighting to save Azeroth, and sating her demon, and getting her estate back on its feet in the strain of the years since the fall of Quel'thalas... and she'd barely been an adult, when it had all begun. She grieved for the that girl, too – the Flower Girl. The one who hadn't known any better. The one mocked for her naivete.
She was a mother to a preteen now; beloved friend, and trusted ally of dragons; half a demon; still, as ever, a Crusader to be called upon by the Argent Crusade; a hobbyist historian, a professional relic-retriever with her own ship and crew, now... who would have to return to piracy on the sly, with the club now removed as a 'hunting ground' to sate the demonic side of her.
Lilliana was all those things, and more – this towering woman, who now sank to her knees in the sand... one hand firmly in the moist earth, gripping the sand tight between her fingers, as the other clutched at the 'silver' pendant of a lioness that she'd worn since the day Ythgar, the Marquis of Vynguld, had gifted it to her.
As the pendant dug into the flesh between her knuckles, the Elven woman shuddered – taking a steadying breath, as the memories... as the anger and the grief washed over her... and she let it pass, pushing down the demon it rankled to life in her breast.
���But a bilge rat always survives.”
Soft and hoarse, these words to the empty beach – and yet, the lessons Iloam had taught Lily as a naive, young paladin had buried themselves deep in her psyche, and still held her in their grip. One knee comes up, plants a booted foot under her, and she hefts herself up in a singular motion – the hand that cleans her face leaving a smear of sand in its wake... and behind her, the pristine, damp sand is broken only by steady footprints that lead away from the messy disturbance she'd left in the sand, in her moment of delayed grief – all that hurt put neatly back in a box, and away out of sight to haunt her another day.
#dwc2024#novemberdwc2024#sin'dorei#blood elf#dalaran#wow rp#wow writing#mourning who you were#fall of Dalaran#I still need to write for my mage as well#but this was such a weirdly personal loss for Lily in a way she finds hard to explain to people#so many deeply defining moments happened within those walls#and she had risen to take Ythgar's place in his old demesne with some measure of pride in bearing his legacy#But sometimes you need to cut away everything to truly start fresh! Maybe it'll be a good thing & she doesn't know it yet.#And she'll do just like Iloam taught her in other ways too! Like bottling up ALLLL of that hurt & letting it fester!#How else does one move forward???
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i just wanna say that it was so refreshing to see Matt Stone get to talk about the rise of antisemitism rn. like yeah start the season off on that!!! it was angry! scathing! yet funny! Matt Stone deserved this episode, you can tell he's fed up and it's unequivocally against antisemitism and nazism, so hopefully the episode hits a lot of people well, ik how sometimes south park can be... interpreted very oddly by some viewers of the show, but I think it's angry yet sympathetic enough to say that people can choose to deny/leave behind violent and bigoted beliefs. It was a good season premiere and I am really excited to see what's next
#south park#matt stone#hopefully what is next isnt like. stunning and brave -_-#the show grows all the time so its really cool to see when it moves forward#in ways like this#the treatment of psychosis was actually really good?#i think sp does well with disabilites#like its def a strong suit#and theyve done a great job with cartman#but it was really great to see him choose to care about others#and try to quell the part of him he wants to improve#cartman forcing himself to take meds!!!#because that isnt him!#not who he wants to be!!!#yes!!!#he does not want to be a nazi!!#idk i think it could be an important one for viewers#and also ofc for matt stone#to get really sick and tired of antisemitism in entertainment
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okay like the thing is that suicide jokes and such are probably not that bad or that big of a deal if you're not really suicidal but if you're For Real suicidal or have been before and are not doing well mentally and you keep making them and start finding comfort in the thought you could kill yourself if you wanted to. be careful
#like i'm being serious rn 😭😭#it genuinely became my only source of comfort and i ended up feeling like that was the only solution#and it wasn't even necessarily bc i wanted to be dead. at least not most of the time#but it felt like the only way for things to change?#i was so stuck and in the extreme act of killing myself i could see change i could see moving forward#which like. yeah but it's obviously DANGEROUS i mean i could've died for real#sometimes i wish i had blabla but mostly i'm glad i didn't but it was still all so awful to go thru?#and idk sometimes i think if i'd not normalized the idea of suicide in my head for so long i wouldn't have gotten to that point#ik that genuinely most ppl who make suicide jokes are gonna be fine it's not gonna affect them much#but some of us are severely mentally ill 😭😭 i've been suicidal on and off since i was 13 or something#and it's just not good for me and i just want to be like. if you're also mentally ill please analyze if it's bad for you too#bc ah brains are fucked up !!!!!!! like i have a personality disorder and my brain has probably never been Not fucked up so i have to accep#that i have to be gentler towards it bc it'll start having fucked up beliefs easily lmao like the amount of things i rationally understand#but emotionally i believe and feel the opposite and it does NOT help to just rationally know !!!!! which sucks#but i'm working on it with a professional bc yeah i can't just get rid of the bad thoughts and negative shit on my own which i guess is ok?#okayyyyy.. back to football
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this piece is killing me slowly but at least i got lost in the sauce and dunn looks great??
#yall ive got no clue what im doing with this one#who let me put seven players in one poster#i know that EVENTUALLY something will click and this coloring will start to be a breeze#but man right now its all just fighting through glue#does it look bad? no. do i know what im doing or how to move forward? also no#do i have a headache? yes#rambles#wips
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i don't know if fishman island era sanji is genuine flanderization or im somehow giving him too much and too little credit at the same time. and maybe i was just frustrated that he regressed so bad after two years on Gender Island when i erroneously assumed (after watching iva + co at impel down express that queerness is as close to the ultimate ideal of freedom that one piece is about as you can get) that he would be better for the experience. and i know im going to turn around on him by the time i get to whole cake island but literally brother can we cut this shit out lmao
#its just very frustrating having a main character's transmisogyny be a major plot thing when 100 episodes ago ANOTHER mc#like thee mc like The Main Guy's LACK of transmisogyny equally moved the plot forward#and all this during an arc where we're supposed to see how much everyone has grown and matured#fishman island#there was that bit when he first showed up again when he was like 'say hi to iva btw' and i was like oh! ok so he got slightly more normal#and then he really really really didnt#one piece#how is it possible to have such complicated emotions about character who is literally french#and like i know that iva like. i KNOW about the trans characters in one piece to come and i know theyre not drawn#like the women on okama island but people have been talking abt how the writing doesnt match the art forever and i finally get it#how are you presenting characters with complicated interiority and heroic arcs as the worst stereotype ever#sure bon clay's design was a joke to start and he's the most universally beloved character in the whole series#and they wrap it around like iva in impel down does have that whole 'you dont have to conform we are who we are by kesha' speech#everyone who is there looks exactly how they want to look bc they have the option via iva of looking different#but that doesnt excuse it!!!!!!!! it doesnt make it better!!!!!!!!!!! on the doyle lens!!!!!!!!#and again i know that two more of the most beloved characters in the series are trans and are not drawn with a joking hand. so ill wait#i'll wait for wano. save me wano arc save me. save me kiku#im literally past fishman island btw im in punk hazard now it just really still bothers me
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Who gave Sondheim the right to write a song as bittersweetly perfect as Sorry-Grateful?
#company#company musical#stephen sondheim#please please let me have the chance to work on that show someday#even if only so I can sit and hear that song from backstage#it’s one of my favorite musicals but if I’m choosing to listen to it it means I’m very confused or stressed in my (lack of) romantic life#in this case I’ve gone on two dates with a really really great guy but am unsure how to move forward#and it’s like deciding to date him opened my eyes to other possibilities and I’m like Hope what is happening#including a new guy who I’ve only JUST met like barely 2 weeks ago but in a few ways he’s like perfect on paper#including the fact he works in the same field as my dad and has actually emailed him in the past#and at the bar we and a bunch of other people were at he took the time to rave about my dad to everyone at our table#and explain how much he admires him from the few email interactions and his general knowledge of what my dad does#and I’m like ok ok major green flags#and yesterday was a hard day for him and I was witnessing it throughout our performance#and I was just finding myself feeling really really concerned and wanting to make him better#and now I’m listening to company and I’m like Hope. what. is. happening.
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the thing about the mitch talk that makes no sense is like. yes, an organization CAN get someone to waive their nmc by saying they're not going to pay what he wants and it would be better for everyone involved to get on board with the idea of a trade if that's the path the organization has Most Certainly decided on, but mitch marner has all the leverage with the leafs in this situation, and it still hardly makes sense to force that or be sure of it at this moment. IF they approached him about not wanting to sign him for what they know he's going to ask which is prob 11.5-12.5 i'd guess (which... why THIS year would suddenly be the year they changed their mind about having a forward group make so much after signing absolutely ridic contracts last year is already lol and before a huge one comes off the books w jt... like.. flkdjs it feels like a fan fueled narrative of frustration here), that would essentially force him into giving them a list of teams he'd be willing to go to. it will be a short list of competitive teams who also are not going to want to be giving up much. the LEAFS would then have to find a trade that works within those very specific teams and is worth it to them, and they might say fuck it, mitch will be the better option to try to get us to the post season this year. and then be a) forced to let him walk for nothing in return if they still don't want to sign him at the end of the year or b) tempted to give him an extension where he MIGHT have driven up his own price based on performance that year. like it just. this narrative that mitch marner in the last year of his contract with a full nmc will be somehow forced out of the leafs and that's the LIKELY outcome is so ????????? tell me one trade where this team improves w the guys out here on expiring deals as it stands rn and why the organization would see improvement bc i can tell you they aren't just going to trade for the sake of cap space. i know the trade deadline and everything will also come into play if he hasn't been re-signed by then, but there's a very real chance mitch marner drives up his own price the way nylander did and then what. people are going to be even more furious like ??? just the surety with which people act like it is happening and Has to Happen despite not knowing whats available on the market or having a genuine proposal is actually terrible for the leafs, lol.
#sorry im still going here but every time i see posts abt it its like#Yes obviously an organization has some leverage and can pressure players into doing things. thats definitely not unheard of#but thinkin the LEAFS hold the cards here is kind of wild bc mitch can say no fuck you im staying? and then what are u gonna do#play him on a 4th line? bench 11 million dollars lfkjdsklf... who helps u succeed in the regular season which you STILL need to do#its just silliness and drama perpetuated by ppl fed up with yet another first round exit like#theyre not going to disrespect mitch marner but i just ultimately dont see how ppl think the organization does not value that man#they know the stats....... the impact.........#this isnt some situation where theyre just like. well experiment with four forwards making lots of money is OVER. the next one up is gone.#like the amt of moving parts and the amt of power mitch specifically holds is.......#a lot flkdvjx#i just need this summer to be over lmakfjdsk i cant#ultimately mitch gets the call on everything and yes the external pressure exists but i truly hope he fucks over the team on the way out#if thats what he decides#and i dont hope he takes a discount so everyone can just keep crying honestljyklgdjklf if he does extend.#which in my mind is definitely the most plausible option lol
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