#whitexdove

[fatetainted]

Clearing the air here though I'm genuinely afraid for my own safety to.

I didn't block @whitexdove "for no reason" and if they had an ounce of self awareness they would know they were an abusive, manipulative person who drove me to attempt suicide because "it's been a week now" and I "need to stop being so negative all the time." If I didn't respond to their messages they would ask me if I hated them or tell me I was ignoring them or I was making their paranoia worse so I would update them that I wasn't in a headspace because I was having a breakdown or a meltdown and would look later. Because of this they accused me of making their anxiety worse and I needed to get over it because I was having a very bad week with my life falling apart. I nearly killed myself because of years of manipulative abuse and them telling me to just get over it when I was suicidal.

But they've been suicidal for years and I was meant to comfort them every time and several times now they have threatened to cut me off multiple times over the most minor, insane little things. Instead of actually communicating what was wrong and how they felt they made essentially a break up playlist blaming me entirely and told me to listen to it to see what I did wrong and the only fault they would ever take was that they didn't say anything sooner. But suddenly when everything was fine again they would ask when I would send them a gift I bought them. However they had essentially convinced me we were over to the point where I grieved the friendship and returned the gift because I had no use for it anymore.

They hide behind mental illness and autism as if that excuses them being abusive to me and the things they've said to my friends. They blame my BPD for blocking them when it's their own actions and I'm sick of your annoying pity parties.

For years they have emotionally abused me and for years my therapist has been telling me they're not a good influence on my life and she was correct. I developed a THC and xanax dependency because they caused me so much anxiety with their abuse that I could not speak to them without using both daily (and of course, if I didn't speak to them or tell them why I wasn't going to be, they would tell me how paranoid I was making them, but if I DO tell them then I'm being too negative and ignoring their boundaries)

They were ALWAYS setting unreasonable boundaries and I bent over backwards to accommodate. Blocking them is my boundary. And now they're fishing for attention and sympathy for a situation they caused themselves and to drag me back into their abusive cycle.

In addition to this they would say very shitty things about my other friends that actually treated me well and tried to manipulate them into not only making them a LOT of free art but making the character details and backstory (which is a very similar thing they got mad at another artist for!). Most of my friends didn't even like them and were being cordial because I was their friend.

They are now refusing to remove characters based on my original work and flipping out on my friends for no reason other than jealousy and pettiness. Stop plagarizing me, stop claiming you just added to my lore when you added NOTHING and nearly everything is based on my ideas, including Dreameater who is literally the twin of my oc in my original work. And Caelum who is the brother of another oc of mine in my universe. You said you "won't throw away characters you worked hard on" but you have no lore that isn't mine and barely ever spoke of these characters or developed them. You added nothing to this universe or these characters. Don't you EVER use the design I made for the alien species (that is my lore and not yours!) again. It's no longer yours and you can have back that mime design you gave me, I truly do not care. But if you don't listen to me now then by your own logic I can bring back those ocs I made in your universe and I will use them because I worked "so hard" on them.

Before you pull the "I'm younger than you, how can I be manipulative?" Like you did before when you had a major fall out JUST like this (and yes! You also force shipped with me and guilt tripped just like you did with her!) Anyone of any age can manipulate someone else of any age. Just because you're younger doesn't make you the victim.

Stumpy. You are a toxic person the refuses to seek out ANY form of help and expected me to play therapist for you all the time but God forbid I need someone to listen and you expected me to accept how terribly you treated me forever. That's why I left.

You identify with and project heavily onto a character who has canonically killed her entire school and drugged her crush to get him to like her and you ship them despite the clear sexual assault and how canonically abusive and terrifying her obsession with him is. She's a genocidal white savior and that's fucking terrifying. Even more so terrifying is the way you joked about how you kill your rats and feed the dead rats to raccoons. And the fact you fetishize trans men being pregnant, it's a very clear very gross fetish you cannot let go of and forced on me constantly. The fact you seem to fetishize sexual assault and rape and ship people like that with their victims is vile. The way you talked about sleeping next to me in the same bed was disturbing as I look back on these things and I truly don't trust you to have not done things while I was unconscious. I have that little faith in you because of how you act and fetishize things.

You also told me you were going to whitewash a canon poc character and it's okay because it's you doing it. Genesis is Asian. He isn't white. You drew my Japanese character with yellow skin. You white knight in public but you're shitty to any race that isn't Korean or Native American.

For the record, I don't hate you. But I'm happier without you in my life and I don't feel anything for you anymore because of your own actions that broke our relationship irreparably. You're a toxic, vile person and completely self centered and extremely possessive.

Get help. And stop playing the fucking victim.

Allow me to return the favor. I take accountability for not saying anything sooner even though with your unreasonable boundaries and constantly telling me you're suicidal that I could never bring it up with you or any bad thing you were doing to me because you would probably kill yourself if I upset you.

Now you take accountability for your actions and deal with the consequences of abusing me.

You literally never loved me, you just miss having someone love you so much you didn't have to love them back (which you pretty much told me several times you were incapable of even with your own family).

Good riddance. Thanks for the memories even though they weren't so great. I truly will not be returning to this blog so don't bother trying to contact me here or anywhere else. I'm done.

[geraniumplant]

𝐂𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫 -- @whitexdove

Tseng brushes the blood off his cheek, clearly unimpressed by Rufus' presence. When the president suggested investigating the murders personally, Tseng certainly didn't anticipate being dragged into a chaotic pursuit across Midgar. Now, he finds himself with an unconscious body to deal with— the poor bastard never stood a chance.

"This is the last time I let you convince me to accompany you playing detective."

[sometimesrufus]

Continued @whitexdove

"Until next time," he grumbles, seeing no obvious red flags. Which probably meant something petty and obvious like there were insects in the garden. He shifts his attention to Reno, still laid out on his floor, and recognizes that he's probably going to have company for a while.

"I hope you didn't have any more pressing matters to attend to this morning. She looks quite comfortable."

[soulsfractured]

Starter for @whitexdove

Tseng had fallen asleep in Rufus' office- not a common occurence at all. He had just thought to wait for the blonde to finish his work, and he would take him home. But his last mission on the field had been boring, and idle. It must have been too quiet in the office. He blinked a few times, taking in the realization he was laying on the couch, and his head was in Rufus' lap.

Amber eyes met blue, and Tseng's lips parted. "You don't have to stop playing with my hair just because I'm awake." He said quietly. "I didn't realize was tired... You should have woken me up. Sitting here in the office all night isn't good for you." Hypocritical, perhaps, but Tseng did have better health than Rufus did.

[shinrascomputer]

Continued | @whitexdove

Lucas groaned at the smacks, red eyes blinking heavily as he tried to focus on Rufus' words- the order not to fall asleep like he wanted to. He'd jumped in front of the blonde without a thought, shoved him aside and taken the worst of the attack before even Reno had the chance to move in. Lucas sure as hell didn't remember Rufus moving over to him.

*I just want to sleep.* He didn't voice the words- didn't do much but give Rufus a weak nod. Lucas would try to stay awake- those blue eyes were filled with concern, Rufus meant it. And Lucas really didn't want to be tased because he fell asleep, that wasn't fair at all... He would bounce back- hell, this couldn't be the worst he'd been hurt, could it? He'd been off duty for a whole year before this was nothing-

The adrenaline was still rushing through him as he focused on Rufus after a few more seconds. "Are you okay?" He whispered.

[spokewar]

@whitexdove / snarter call.

"Cody is going to kill me." Spoken more to himself than at the other. Hosting a member of the cartel on his ship was sure to fall under the man's list of poor ideas, regardless if the kid were an acquaintance of his padawan or not. And as much as he would have liked to, it would have been hypocritical to criticize Anakin's choice of company given Obi-Wan's own tendency to gravitate toward the more dangerous and reckless members of society, but even his connections didn't run any deeper beyond bounty hunters or modified weapons dealers, certainly not groups who peddled in genetic experimentation.

"You are absolutely not allowed in Republic space, you know that, yes? No, don't answer that. I don't want to learn anything more than what I have to." A sentiment that had come far too late as he was already familiar to names, faces, and the strange animals which eyed him with far too much suspicion to be comfortable. "I am going to ask you three questions and you are only going to give me three answers." He did not leave a moment to respond. "What planet did you come from, how many of those are there?" Spoken while broadly gesturing to the two oversized tookas. "And is Anakin in over his head trying to help you on his own?"

[escortingsecrets]

Shivan and Rufus are just those two gay guys raising their kids together and running a small cafe in Edge. No they arent dating. No there isnt any desire to do so. Yes they both have trauma. Yes Shivan constantly says "Go ask your mom" because he doesnt like telling the kids no--

@whitexdove

[reevc]

he's a 10. but i think he's a furry. (im sorry)

"Nya~? I mean- .... I don't know what you are talking about Sir."

Hes a 10 but... || accepting @whitexdove

[gcldfanged]

⁉️ Your last 'oh shit' moment?

Munday Meme [ACCEPTING]

When I started falling off the bed last week =.=

I was trying to get UP from a laying position without straining my stomach muscles and forgot how close to the edge of the mattress I had fallen asleep and just ate shit.

Luckily, they did a CT scan at the ER and I didn't tear anything or have internal bleeding, so phew...

[fatetainted]

@whitexdove sent: "I have two brains in my body and yet, I've never been so stupid."

don't let the impulsive thoughts win, don't let the impulsive thoughts win, don't let the impulsive thoughts win, don't-- "you may be giving yourself too much credit." that was not any better.

[monstersmade]

"What is it that you want from this world?" Kadaj asks; a true curiosity in his voice. His disconnect from humanity shouldn't bother him but he finds himself fascinated by the interesting ones. The strong ones, the ones with goals, with powerful will. What made them different? Why weren't they all like that?

@whitexdove

[sometimesrufus]

your Rufus, meeting the version of himseld where he's a mentally ill gen z:

Nah he's just confused like how did it get this bad. XD

[soulsfractured]

Still love the fact that Rufus, at 15, had an 11 year old kid put into his care and basically said "yeah Im a dad now"

@whitexdove

Rufus basically just

[shinrascomputer]

Lucas has an oral fixation and that is a threat

Don't mind me harassing poor @whitexdove with my bastard gremlin

[geraniumplant]

(from the I'm going to save your life prompts, for tseng) the doctors are coming. just hang on.

He lets out a soft, pained sound, barely a whisper as Tseng's focus flickers like a dying flame, dark spots creeping into his vision. Blood stains his face, a crimson testament to the violence he endures—trickling from the corners of his mouth, a bitter reminder of the chaos that surrounds him. Gunshots, blades, rough hands; these are the scars of his existence. Yet, amidst the haze of pain, his thoughts are consumed by Rufus. The man he loves so fiercely, who struggles to show his emotions, looks shattered, as if he's being ripped apart.

Tseng wants to reach out to offer solace, but his words are swallowed by the gurgling of blood that rises in his throat. With greaf effort, he manages to lift his arm, his fingertips grazing Rufus' knuckles, a fragile connection before his vision fades completely.

[escortingsecrets]

@whitexdove

"Don't worry, I won't be too long- I'm just getting a few supplies I left in the Honeybee. You can just wait here in the car, alright?"