#while sexting a random girl is so funny to me

[cr0ixs4nt]

Just started Resident Lover and I'm LOVING IT

[sapphire-weapon]

Thanks for saving my masturbation ask for last. It allowed me to read about Leon fucking himself while I enjoyed my breakfast and coffee. But the part where Remake Leon pretty much has to make love to himself (when there are definitely people willing to help out) and still feels nothing after was great. I feel like he'd be the type to just lay there for a while after, letting his cum dry onto his skin and ruminate on his life cuz what's the point of his futile existence.

I also like that DI Leon is a whole separate Leon in himself. I feel bad for the girls he sexts with on Tinder if his cheesy dialogue is in any way shape or form similar to how he jokes around in the movie. He does seem more vulgar though, so he gets points for that.

A question just popped into my head while writing this: does any variation of Leon send dick pics?

I hope your day is much better today! ✨

That mental image of Leon just lying there in his own mess, staring at the ceiling, possibly with an arm draped over his forehead, is so strong. Just wondering to himself why he even bothered, what the point of it is. And eventually he just peels himself off of his sheets, cleans himself up, and goes for a run -- and realizes he should've just fucking gone running in the first place, because the endorphin rush from exercise is so much more helpful than whatever the fuck it was that he'd just done.

And LMAO DI Leon is a whole version on his own because he's pretty much reached the point of breaking through the other side of the self-isolation part of his depression and has finally allowed himself to, like. Have friends and be a part of society again.

I imagine he's a lot better at sexting than he is trying to do the whole phone sex thing with his actual verbal words. When he can actually see written out the dumb shit that he's about to say, he's able to self-edit and be like "oh that looks bad actually" lmao but I'm sure he still gets away with it verbally too because girls are like "but he's got a hot voice tho"

I mean, I wouldn't give him a pass, but I'm also not your average Tinder girl. Or on Tinder at all, actually LMAO

My knee-jerk reaction to the dick pics question was "oh hell no he's a fed he knows exactly how easily that can be mined from his or anyone else's phone from almost anywhere" but then I remembered we were talking about OG Leon and not Remake Leon, and I don't think OG Leon would give a fuck LMAO so, yeah, he totally sends dick pics.

He doesn't send them unsolicited, though. At least, for the most part. He doesn't wait to be explicitly asked, but he'll usually only send them while he's already in the process of actively sexting someone. If he sends em outside of that, it's because it's relevant to/appropriate for the conversation.

As funny as I think it'd be for Leon to be that guy who just surprises you in the middle of your day with a random dick pic, I don't think he's got the free time tbh -- and even when he does, he lives a busy enough lifestyle to be cognizant of the fact that other people may also be busy and can't just be on the receiving end of shit like that out of the blue.

[pochqmqri]

It has now been a full year since my ex broke up with me, after "no longer having any romantic feelings" for me. The same ex who had been so dismissive of my sexual wants in our relationship, that she would never give the time of day to even look at or compliment any of my nudes because she was asexual now, that she didn't feel horny anymore to engage in sexting, but would continue on the side to do those activities with random strangers on her 18+ accounts. The same one who, on the day of the breakup, just before it, asked to see my nudes to "test something," since she was "feeling horny again and wanted to check against something [she] knew she wasn't for," only to break the bad news after, and then criticize my nudes because she only likes "full body shots" despite constantly sharing tummy and dick pics of other random girls. The same one who said that when she reblogged posts about girlcock, she said it was "only in jest" and didn't mean that she was sexually attracted to me, that is, I was being fetishized by her. I'm not going to say another trans woman is a chaser, but she was showing chaser tendencies. The same one who would engage in sexting with other members of the polycule server I used to be in, but when I brought up that I felt left out, she said there was nothing she could do about that. The same one who refused to be there for me emotionally during our relationship, such as when my own native country was being coup'd, or when my friend's mom died after a driver hit her, that she didn't have "the spoons" and would consistently pass it over to our other (an another ex) partner or ask if I had a therapist to talk to, treating the polycule like she could designate tasks she didn't want to do with me to other people.

It's also been a full year since I last talked to her, the last thing I said to her being that she had gaslighted me too many times in our relationship, and her last thing trying to deny it, ending with, "seeing all this, i feel like you were only looking at my sexual side as if you were trying to isolate it from the rest of my self but in doing so failed to understand key things about myself as a whole, hence your confusion as to why i would interact with sexual content that i wouldn't theoretically like." I have several regrets of that relationship, such as spending an exorbitant amount on Canadian shipping to give her gifts for her birthday from Japan, which she felt no real remorse for in our breakup, but one regret that sticks with me was how I should have called her out on her hypocrisy and been more rude about it. I was stupid for letting her get away with so much, and she was thus able to get away scot-free thinking that she did nothing wrong (technically it was a centrist both-sidesy "neither of us did anything wrong uwu" thing).

Directly following the aftermath, I had to set aside my emotions, because I was in the midst of finals week for my last semester of university as an undergrad. If she had been waiting about a week and a half to break up with me, I would have appreciated it if she waited a little bit longer until I was done with school. Nevertheless, I persevered and maintained a 4.0 GPA.

Over the summer, my ex would coax her partner (also my ex but broke up with me a month earlier) to move in with her across the country. They had planned this for a while now. I was a bit envious, two trans girls in an online relationship finally moving in together, that's the dream isn't it? Looking back, it was funny that my ex, who when we started dating, was in a polycule dating four other girls including me, then proceeded to lose each girl one by one with me as the second-to-last one. It's almost like I was just a "test." I spent my summer looking to get hired, though I had little luck being a bio major with barely any experience. I had to settle on unpaid internships for a while, where I was treated like shit and made to do menial tasks.

I wasn't doing well, even a few months after, I was lonely. I still had my online friends, who stuck by me, but I realize that after my horrible experience in an online relationship with her, I no longer wanted to go headfirst into something like that again. I didn't want to "e-date," and I wanted to make more friends IRL. After graduating, I lost touch with a bunch of people, including my work friends who I cherished a lot, and I was back to my reclusive ways. This all stems from my insecurities of being closeted IRL, how it's hard for me to create a "fake face" to make and keep friends, and even that I'm ashamed to date if I haven't even bothered to come out as my true self, because I'm lying to everyone including myself. Yet still, I made the effort to reconnect with a few friends in person, even one who I had not talked to for about four years. I'm still working on that though.

My fortune that year turned around towards the last few months, when I went on vacation to visit my relatives in Australia. It was the first time I left the U.S. since early 2018. I enjoyed my time there greatly, I got to see and do so many cool things, such as snorkel in the Great Barrier Reef. It definitely helped take my mind of my ex.

When I came back to the U.S. earlier this year, I had to hit the grind on job hunting again, and I still wasn't very successful on that, especially since I promised to no longer work for free again. Luckily, at that point, I was working part-time as a babysitter for a family friend's child, being paid pretty well. Around late March, I went back to one of my internships (one that treated me much better) and did a paid internship with them, of which I just completed recently.

As of my ex, I learned back in April that she debuted as a vtuber, with a live rig and such. I knew she was considering it a year ago, and though I don't care about that subculture, I would have supported her had we been still together. What's peculiar is that she wanted to study to become a pharmacy tech, and that she would get a stable income from that to become a vtuber...I guess she got that "stable income" rather quickly, since live rigs cost hundreds of dollars. It's really suspicious to me that she's able to sit on her ass pretending to be a "nekomata slime girl" (who's actually white) that can speak Japanese, playing video games, while her current partner since moving in with her last July, has made several donation posts asking for money due to her struggling to find a job. It feels extremely selfish to me.

I thought about if I should call out my ex, with all the receipts on what she did to me, along with her seemingly not helping her partner pay the bills as a no-name vtuber isn't making much anyways. For the receipts, I thought that they were too personal and people would see it as stuff that "should stay in the DMs" so I stalled on the issue. Not to mention, because she's no-name and doesn't even have 100 followers, I thought it would be cruel to even target her.

Over the last couple of weeks, I settled on a decision. I'm moving on. That doesn't mean I forgive her, or that there's a chance I will at this rate, when she rebranded as a vtuber, she unfriended me on Discord (of which I never messaged her since the breakup but kept it open in case there was an opportunity to talk again), which probably makes it clear that she wants nothing to do with me anymore. I don't want to get "revenge" or even with her anymore, because I already have the best kind of such, which is the way I currently live. I could do better for sure, but looking back at the past year since the break up, I'm much happier without her, I've experienced a lot of new things on my own, met new people and reconciled with old ones. I spent time streaming anime with friends again, hung out with a friend downtown, been making and saving up money, and there's so much more ahead for me. I haven't come out publicly and transitioned to be my truest and fullest self yet, but I know that will happen eventually, that I will have the courage to do so, even if not to my family, in stealth. I want to maybe go on a trip by myself to see friends who live far away, I want to go back to being my pre-pandemic self. I don't want to be tethered to her any longer, I want to take more risks in my life, stop feeling too comfortable.

[ruminate88]

Discarded And Confused

I had been questioning for months why Andrew wasn’t breaking up with me when he seemingly appeared too stressed out and busy for me. He barely spent time with me after he love-bombed me and I just didn’t understand what was going on. My biggest fear was that I wasn’t the only girl he was flirting with or talking to. I was also confused and irritated by the fact he was calling me “babe” or “beautiful” but treating me like some random chick he didn’t know. Never called me by my real name and I questioned did he remember my real name or was he talking to so many other girls he didn’t know me that well??

After Valentine’s Day, he just appeared more cold but would randomly be romantic towards me when I least expected it and I was too invested to just walk away. I had been stalking all of his social media, including his mom’s and I was totally obsessed with him! I couldn’t focus on anything else or get any work accomplished. I was just very distracted and only wanted him. I just could tell he didn’t want me the same way BUT when he would randomly be romantic with me, it would confuse me. He called me “babe” so I called him “babe”!! I loved it and didn’t want it to go away but something deep inside me just knew it was all over!!! My friend Bri had been secretly texting him behind my back trying to get answers for me, when I asked her not to do it!! She didn’t tell me for a whole entire month!!!

When Spring break started, exams were FINALLY OVER and I was so excited. Andrew left and went home. He was super chill now with no stress!! I was looking forward to spending much needed time with him but never knew what was about to happen. Monday, first day of spring break, we are texting and I ask him what he’s getting to do on his break. He tells me he’s with his grandpa at the doctors. I believed him because I had no way of knowing otherwise. IN the midst of what started out as a simple conversation, Andrew began to text me, “I don’t know why you love me so much. I’ll never deserve you or be good enough for you!” UGH!! Same weird conversation as Christmas. Once again I thought he was breaking up with me… I told him to understand I was going to be upset and cry but to give me space and it’s ok. I can tell he wants to break up, I felt it awhile and I wasn’t surprised but it still sucked. Andrew was just acting soooo funny with me. I went on a walk, trying to figure it all out and make sense of it all. There was just sooo much fog!!! However, Andrew tells me “I’m NOT breaking up with you.” I didn’t understand at all why he was saying that and I tried so hard to pour out my undying love for him but I could just feel myself grasping my nails onto him, holding on for dear life while he’s slipping through. It was frustrating, super emotional and confusing!

A few days later and I think we’re okay now, I wake up to Andrew randomly being romantic again!! He’s all over me and I’m soooo excited. We cyber sex, it’s hot and I’m thinking things are turning back around…. I can’t truly remember if it was that night or next day, BUT Bri text me, asking how things are going. I tell her it’s gotten better with Andrew, that he’s spending more time with me and even cyber sexted me. Bri was shocked AND knew then I was going to be that much more upset. Bri proceeds to tell me she has to confess something and that I’m NOT going to like it. I already know it’s bad but I’m bracing myself for what she’s going to send me. Then Bri finally confessed she had been texting Andrew behind my back for a month, he’s tried to flirt with her, she has messages of it AND says I’m probably not the only girl he’s talking to/dating. Bri sent me screen shots of messages and instantly my heart was racing, my hands were sweaty and I was breaking down ready to cry!!

In the messages between Bri and Andrew, she asked him what he’s doing and he says “he’s in the shower 😉, does she want to join?” AND she asked him “Is there anyone else you’re talking to?” AND Andrew said back, “There’s nobody else”….. WOW 😣 I was instantly heart broken and super angry. A year with this man, sending pics of me and wasting my time focused and obsessed with him. Right away I sent the screen shots from Bri to Andrew and told him, “You need to explain this right now!!!” Andrew pretended to be so shocked and asked me, “Where did you get these????” I told him from my friend, Bri, and that I think he’s cheating on me. Andrew pretended to be so confused, asking me who in the world Bri is, says he doesn’t know Bri and RIGHT AWAY says, “I thought that was you and that you made a new account on KiK!!!!” Even though we had been cyber-sexting from KiK, texting from our actual phone numbers AND sending Snapchats! How could he be so dumb to believe I would make another KiK account???? I remember wanting to call Andrew on the phone to hear his voice and get his story.

I called Andrew up, he actually answered and I told him how my friend Bri said she texted him behind my back trying to see what he would say. Andrew told me he believed it was me he was talking to the whole time and NOT to be upset at Bri, basically he doesn’t think she did anything wrong AND never admitted to cheating of any kind. Stuck with the story that he believed I made another KiK account and he was talking to me the whooooole time. I was sooooooo confused!!! Part of me believed he was trying to cover his butt and another small part of me actually thought maybe he’s “that stupid”…. My friend Bri was trying to defend herself and tell me Andrew is lying and cheating that I shouldn’t trust him but trust her only!! At that point, I was so hurt and bothered by all of it, I trusted no one and I was sooooooo heartbroken!!

At some point Andrew and I are on the phone and there’s no yelling, he stopped defending himself but he just wasn’t really saying much. I’m just standing there with the phone to my ear, holding back tears, snot trying to drip from my nose and my stomach was shaking. I asked Andrew what’s next, what does he want to do, does he want to break up?? He refused to answer, he kept putting it back on me, saying, “What do you think we should do??” Wow… THAT was beyond what my mind could understand or make sense of. I asked Andrew a simple question, “Well, can you say you love me??” …… Silent. Andrew said NOTHING! You could hear a pin drop. Andrew had no answer, which told me everything I needed to know but it still sucked and made no sense. SO I said back to Andrew, “If you can’t say you love me, you should break up with me!! Why would you date someone you don’t love??? Andrew’s response to me was, “You are so good to me, just the sweetest girl I’ve ever met. I don’t know why you treat me so good. I never deserved you and I’ll never be worthy of your love. I just want you to be soooo happy and I don’t want you to cry!!!” WHAT??!!! Worse, we went in circles…. I told him I did love him very much and he made me happy but if he doesn’t love me, he shouldn’t be with me and that I WAS going to cry because he hurt me.” It’s like Andrew just could not handle breaking up. He was refusing to say it, refusing to end things and kept saying the same phrases over and over, “I’m not worthy of your love” and “I don’t deserve you”….. It felt to me Andrew was wanting me to end things instead of him doing it but I was still very very confused and grasping to what little bit left with him I had. Obviously I wanted him to feel the way I did and he wasn’t going to. I had NO idea he was just using me and manipulating me. I could not understand him.

I stood there on the phone trying to be brave and be a “big girl” but it was hard. Tears on the edge of my eyelids, not able to fall down my cheeks yet, snot sliding but I kept sniffling it back up, embarrassed, scared, confused, sad, not quite accepting he’s lying and cheating!! Asking him what he wants to do from here. He just kept saying, “I don’t know what’s best for us.” BUT WHY???? If Andrew couldn’t say he loved me, how could he NOT know what to do??? 3 LONG HOURS WE WENT IN CIRCLES having the saaaaame conversation, Andrew continued to say he didn’t want me to cry, that he only wanted me to be happy but I told him I was not happy because he can’t say he loved me and he talked to Bri behind my back, telling her “There’s nobody else” and I told Andrew, “I’m just a nobody to you!!!!” Andrew swore he didn’t mean that but obviously he was caught, he couldn’t take it back or change it and the fact he couldn’t say he loved me, was enough for us to go our separate ways ACCEPT Andrew wouldn’t end it with me. He drug the whole thing out, he kept saying what I wanted to hear to prolong me from leaving him. He would NOT let go of me and it was making me a wreck!!!! I could not make sense of why he wouldn’t just end it and say “sorry let’s break up” NO! He kept circling back around to “I want you to be so happy”.

SO, I was getting exhausted and weary. I told Andrew that we weren’t getting anywhere in the conversation that I needed a break from him. He has pushed me to the edge where I was about to fall off into a dark abyss. I hung up, I’m so hurt, sad and confused, I just didn’t know what to think of him. I was pacing the floor feeling hopeless with him. Not much longer after that, Andrew sent me the most frustrating text!!! He said, “Why do we have to make a decision today??? Why are you making this such a big deal?? What if we both take the weekend apart from each other and think things over first then come back together and decide then…” WAS HE SERIOUS???? My heart was crumbling to pieces, my nerves were at an all-time high and my stomach was shaking soooo hard!! I could not believe he asked that of me. Quickly I became in rage and I FINALLY stood up for myself!! I called him and after several rings it went to his voice mail… I POURED OUT MY HEART AND SOUL IN ANGER! I said in my voice message, “NO! You are not dragging this out! That’s so unfair to me!!! I’ve been so good to you and no we are not taking a weekend apart to think it over, since you can’t do the breaking up for some reason, I’m DOING IT FOR YOU!! IT’S OVER!!!!!!!” I was crying, shaking, I kicked the wall and slammed the door. I paced in circles just falling apart such a mess!!!!!!!

20-30 minutes later, Andrew sent me a text saying he went with his mom and sister and left his phone at home by accident. Then asked me did I try to call him…. Wow. 😨 I told him YES and that I left him a voicemail. He said okay that he will listen to it and be right back. (He was trying to pretend like nothing was wrong) IT WAS SO WEIRD!! Not much longer after he said he would listen to my voice mail, he came back to me AND his response was, “Awwww… okay. Can we still be friends?” 😳😰🫣😤🥺😖😭

I knew then that’s what Andrew wanted all along was to break up but it made no sense to me why I had to do the breaking up and the way he had no emotions about it just wrecked me!!! It tore me up and shattered my heart into a million pieces!!! I had no idea what to think or believe about Andrew at that point. He made nooooo sense!!!!

That night my family was over my house and I was locked in my bathroom with my fan on, crying so hard, not able to breathe and it hurt so much!!!! It was MOST confusing and hard to piece together. That whole night I was tossing and turning, I dreamt he was trying to still hook up with me and that the breakup wasn’t truly over. When I woke up the next morning, he was ALL I could think of and I missed him so bad I couldn’t resist texting him. I wished him good morning and asked how he was doing… he said he was “fine” and asked me how I was doing… I told him I felt like a zombie, that I cried all night and I was so sad and hurt. He told me “sorry” which didn’t feel legit but told me I needed space and that I was “going to be okay” AND stopped responding to me. I was a mess all day and regretting breaking up with him EVEN THOUGH I KNEEEEEW I did the right thing. I KNEW in my gut things were not right with him but just couldn’t understand it all. I was in serious trauma bond and cognitive dissonance!! I could not keep away from him and found myself running back to him for further punishment and that’s what I got!!

I then proceeded to spend a summer of torture and humiliation with Andrew! It was a nightmare and I believe he’s an evil person!!! I believe he was trying to push me to hurt myself. I’m not gonna wanna talk about that either but maybe my story will help someone make sense of their situation?

[spideyspeaches]

Hey I love your fics so much! Can you write something like Peter was distracted by his phone during lab time with Tony so Tony asks him embarrassing questions and so Peter tells him about you? ❤

Akdkskg lmfaoo this is so cute love me some embarrassing Irondad 😌😌

WC: 0.8k

Warnings: mentions of sex ;)

Masterlist

Girl from chemistry

Peter loved lab days with Tony. 

They weren't as rare as they used to be back when he had crashed the Stark jet in Coney Island, he came by the tower every Tuesday and Thursday now. 

"Thanks for picking me up again Hap!" Peter said chirpily, slamming the door of the not so discreet Audi, a big grin playing on his face as he saw the man in question grumble a greeting, before closing the divider.

Any other day, he would have been offended by the grumpy Happy, but today, today he had something else in his mind. 

You, Y/N L/N- the sweetest, kindest, most beautiful girl in his school- had given him your number (albeit for a chemistry project), but he couldn't get the giddy feeling in his chest to calm down. 

His stomach was churning with excitement, butterflies fluttering in his chest as he opened his phone, your contact name already saved in.

He found out that it was very easy to talk to You- the back and forth of memes, gifs and nonsensical talk made his heart flutter. 

He didn't notice that they had reached the tower until Happy tapped on the window on his side, startling him from his conversation with You.

"Kid you gotta get out of there to get in the tower." He said, tapping his foot impatiently.

"Sorry, sorry I'm out!" Peter chuckled, shuffling to get out.

"Hey, hey easy kid, don't forget your backpack!" Happy shouted, tossing the aforementioned backpack at Peter, who caught it with ease.

"Thanks Happy!" 

He strutted into the tower with a jump in his footsteps, humming along to a random song his super hearing had caught some girl listening to in the last period.

"Hey FRIDAY! How's your day been?" He asked, entering the elevator, swiping his card to take him to the workshop in the penthouse, since there was no button to access the floor.

"I'm functioning well Peter, thank you for asking." 

"Great to hear that." He chirped, still not looking up from your chat.

"You seem to be in a happy mood today, Peter." FRIDAY said. It freaked Peter a little, how humane an AI could sound, but then again, she was Tony Stark's AI.

"Yeah. Yeah I am." He sighed.

Entering the room, he navigated his way through muscle memory, tossing his backpack with a muttered "Hey Tony!", before settling down on the stools near his counter.

"Hello to you too kiddo." Tony smiled. Looking up from his project again, he noticed that Peter seemed to have not noticed his comments at all. He was too immersed in his phone. 

"You were going to fix your web-shooters right?" Tony asked, raising an eyebrow when he saw Peter suppress a smirk, red coating his cheeks and neck.

"Yeah. I'll uh, I'll do it in a minute." 

"Mmhm. Don't forget about the StarkWatch prototype either." 

"Will do Mister Stark." 

That caught Tony by surprise. It took a while for Peter to warm up to him, but after months of persuasion, he had finally taken up to calling him "Tony", and it was only when he was sick or embarrassed or not paying attention that he would slip in a "Mister Stark." 

"Uhuh, they're removing Chewbacca from the Star Wars franchise." He tried, only getting an excited nod from Peter.

"Kid... are you sexting with your girlfriend? Boyfriend? Enbiefriend?" He smirked.

"Yes, Uhuh, yeah- wait what? Mister Stark!" Peter sputtered, finally looking up from his phone, to see Tony doubling over with laughter, "not funny!" 

"It is though. So… who was it?" He said, folding his hands on his chest, scratching his goatee. 

Once again, Peter looked down, but not at his phone this time.

"She- she's this girl. From chemistry." 

"Girl from chemistry huh?" 

"Yeah, she's really sweet and cute and so smart Mister Stark! Like she can ace any subject you throw at her, not throw that would be rude but she's just, the prettiest girl I've ever met and she makes my heart flutter, or maybe it's just heartburn from the meatballs, they tasted sketchy, but no really! She makes my tummy feel funny and my brain malfunctions when she smiles and wow she's the bestest person I've ever met!" He said, huffing to take a breath, looking at a bemused Tony Stark.

"Take a breath kid, now, have you asked her out yet?" He asked, hopping on the counter with his legs dangling so he could face the kid.

"I- I don't know if she likes me that way." Peter muttered, looking dejected.

"You don't know that yet kid, take your chance when you can." 

"Yeah, I will." Peter sighed dreamily, walking backwards and flopping on the couch placed in the corner, throwing a leg over the head of the couch, "I'll do it tomorrow." 

"I'm sure you will. Oh and, use protection okay? Don't want tiny spider babies running around too soon, I'm too young to be a grandpa." 

"Mister Stark!" 

[gyll-yee-haw]

Hi honey! Would you do something when reader, Jake and Seb are co-stars in a movie and they have a 3some? Please

I CAN’T EXPRESS HOW MUCH I LOVED THIS REQUEST! Now get ready for mean daddy Jake and soft daddy Seb... Dirty as requested by literally everyone who replied to my question lol... hope you enjoy it!

I could swear it was a joke when it all started. But it got out of hand too quickly. Jake, Seb and I were like best friends, since we worked together all the time. And the fans had a little war because of which ship was real: Jake and I or Seb and I. Well, none of them is. But try to tell that to them... So I started to flirt with both of them as a joke. The problem was that we were now all in the same movie and I had to deal with both of them at the same time. Suddently, the joke started to get a little serious... some dirty jokes here, some kisses there... the problem was when the sexting started. Some nights it was Jake who started to send me those texts. Some nights it was Seb. Some nights it was both. And they were fully aware that they were sharing me. That's why Jake came up with this idea... We were having lunch in the studio when I knew things were getting out of control. Jake and Sebastian were arguing (as a joke, of course). "Let's see who gets to fuck her first." Sebastian smirked, making my face heat up. "She's right here." Jake agreed. "Tell us, who do you prefer, love?" "Don't make me choose..." I rolled my eyes, still thinking it was all a joke. "Can't choose?" Jake thought for a moment. "Why don't you take both of us at the same time, then?" Sebastian left out a loud laugh. I wish I could laugh as well, maybe he would forget that idea. But I didn't. Jake and I just looked at each other and anyone could feel the tension. Sebastian stopped laughing. It all got serious. No escape now. I either had to choose one, or... choose both. I didn't want to choose one, since I was extremely attracted to both of them. But a threesome? I had never done that before... --- The boys decided to give me some time to think about it. A week passed and no one brought the subject up again. But the more I thought about it, the less crazy the idea sounded... or maybe I was getting crazier. All I knew was that it got to a point that I started to think about it at random times, and my body started to crave it. I tried to make that go away, I touched myself, but nothing was enough. Nothing compared to it. --- All it took was one phone call. And now both of them were on their way to my house. Jake was the first one to get there. "Hey, baby." He said, and as I was greeting him with a hug, he enjoyed to get his lips on my neck. "Hey... calm down." I took a step back, even though my body wanted the opposite. "We have to wait for Seb. I said both at the same time, that wouldn't be fair." "Okay." He shrugged and took a sit on the couch. "Just trying to get you warmed up. But I know I don't need to do that, right? Cause you wouldn't have called us in the middle of the night if you weren't absolutely desperate." "And you wouldn't have come so quickly if you weren't too." I smirked. "True." He admitted. "But I never hid from anyone how bad I want you. All this time..." I heard someone knock on the door and felt butterflies in my stomach. Finally. Jake stopped talking and looked at the door, then back at me with a smirk. I took a deep breath and walked towards the door, fully aware that Jake's eyes were all over my body. When I opened it, I saw Seb a little less confident than Jake, but he surely was more excited. "We were waiting for you." I said, gesturing for him to come inside. "Sorry, doll." He walked in and I gave him a kiss on the cheek. "Hey, Jake." "Oh?" Jake pretended to be offended. "So he gets kisses?" "You didn't get one?" Sebastian teased. I could feel a heat between my legs as I watched them fighting for me. Well, not actually fighting, cause we all knew that this wouldn't be so fun without a little competition. Deep down, one wanted the other to be there as much as I did. "Don't be greedy, boys." I said. "Everyone here is gonna get whatever we want tonight." "Why don't you tell us what you want, princess?" Jake stood up and walked to where Seb and I were. Now, being here between both of them, it started to look real. "Well... I..." I was too nervous to describe everything that was going on in my head. "She looks shy now." Jake mocked. "Isn't she adorable, Sebastian?" "It's okay, baby." Seb stood behind me and started to run his hands up and down my arms, making me relax. "We won't do anything you don't want us to. You just have to tell us." Seb seemed to be a more romantic lover. He was surely more worried about me than about himself. Jake seemed more impatient. He acted like the kind of guy who would fuck your brains out in five minutes and pretend nothing happened on the next day. That's why I couldn't choose... "Let's go to my bedroom." I suggested. "And you two can do anything you want. But whatever happens there, stays there." --- Seb and Jake were sitting in my bed and I stood in front of them. I removed my clothes, revealing a cute set of lace lingerie. They licked their lips almost simultaneously. Then I sat on Jake's lap, kissing him like this was a movie scene, but only Sebastian was watching. I helped Jake take his shirt off, and suddently I felt strong arms wrapping around my waist. Next thing I knew was that Sebastian had pulled me to his lap. We both giggled and I repeated the kiss, now with him. As I gave him a break to take his shirt off, I watched Jake pulling his pants down. I leaned forward to grab his cock over his underwear and started to stroke it. Seb grabbed my waist and forced me to lift my hips so he could pull his pants down as well. As soon as he did, I sat on his lap again and felt his hard cock with only our underwears separating us. So I continued to stroke Jake, and started to move my hips, rubbing my clothed pussy against Seb's cock. They both moaned at the same time and I smiled. "Daddy?" I called. "Yes?" They both replied at the same time, making me laugh. "What's so funny, sweetheart?" Jake grabbed my chin, forcing me to look at his face. God, he had fire in his eyes... "Having fun, aren't you? You have two daddies to care care of you. Isn't that great?" "Yes..." I was getting more turned on by his words, so I started to rub myself faster agaisnt Seb, making him grab my waist, to slow down a bit. "Jesus... Turn her around, Sebastian." Jake sighed. For a moment, I didn't know what was wrong. But Seb did as Jake said, handling my body like I was nothing. He forced me to get down on all fours, ass turned to Jake. He knew what was going to happen, but I didn't. When I felt a loud spank on my ass, I left out a surprised, but delighted, moan. "Do you think it only has a bright side?" Jake mocked, hitting me again. "Having two daddies means you have to respect two men. Do you think this is all about you, honey?" "No..." I replied, earning a new slap. Seb grabbed my face and I could see in his eyes that he enjoyed watching me being treated like a slut. "No, what?" He said rasply. And if I wasn't already down on all fours, after hearing that tone escape his lips, I would be. "No, sir." I answered, getting a little kiss from Jake, where he was slapping before. "Good girl." Seb complimented, and I absolutely melted. "I knew you could be a good girl to us." Jake said, playing with my soaked underwear, using his fingers to tease me. "In return, we're gonna play with your little holes, would you like that?" I nodded eagerly, letting out something that sounded like a "yes daddy", but my head was too fucked up to speak properly. "Ask, then." He pulled my panties down and squeezed my ass with both hands, spreading it open and I never felt that empty before. "Jakey... please, sir... will you fuck my ass while my other daddy fucks my pussy?" I asked as nicely as I could. I watched Sebastian and Jake exchange glances and prepared myself to get hit again, because it looked like I had said something wrong. "You weren't joking when you said you wanted us at the same time, right, baby?" Sebastian smirked. "The plan was to get you so horny, you would have to pick one of us to fuck you first, but this..." Jake explained. "This sounds even better." "I need both."  I replied, trying to process that they had some kind of plan... "Fuck." Sebastian said under his breath, bringing me to his lap again. He kissed me hungrily, running his hands through my body, until his fingers met my pussy. He pushed two fingers in and pumped a few times, then he removed them and I felt them spreading my wetness on my asshole, like some kind of lube, before pushing one finger inside of it. Jake approached us, sitting behind me, facing Seb. While Seb was preparing me, Jake had removed his underwear. I couldn't see much, because I was busy kissing Seb, and that mystery only made everything more instense. Soon, I felt Jake's finger repeat Seb's gesture and enter me as well. The feeling of having both of their fingers inside me at the same time, was driving me crazy. They used their fingers to spread me open, then Jake slid his cock inside me slowly and the pain was only a detail, cause having those two men taking care of me like that, made me want more and more. As soon as Jake was all in, I relaxed with my back against his chest and spread my legs for Seb to join. "Are you okay?" He asked as he removed his underwear. "No..." I complained. "Need you." They both laughed. But Seb didn't waste time, quickly aligning his cock and entering me slowly. I felt SO FULL, I had to hold myself to not come right there. Jake grabbed both my breats and played with them as he started to move his hips. Seb didn't take any longer to start moving as well, using his thumb to rub small circles on my clit. I was absolutely overwhelmed... a moaning mess. I closed my eyes and I could swear there wasn't a single cell on my body that wasn't feeling them. And, God, they felt so good. At first, they started at the same pace. But as they got closer to their orgasms, their rhythm became a mess. I felt like a fuck toy, who just sat there as two men took what they needed from me. Jake was the first to come. When I felt him filling my ass like that, I begged Sebastian to rub my clit harder, cause I had never been that turned on before. Seconds later, I came too, and I could swear that this time I went to heaven and came back shaking so much, that Jake had to hold my hips for Seb to continue. "Shhh baby..." Jake said against my neck as he spread kisses there. "We're almost done, you've been so good to us..." Jake was still buried deep inside my ass, holding my hips still, cause I couldn't stop shaking and crying because of my orgasm, and Seb was being so fucking loud as he pounded me. When Seb filled me up, I came a second time. And that made it absolutely impossible for me to move after it. Seb picked me up and laid me down in bed. I felt both my holes dripping their cum and smiled, completely satisfied. Jake helped Seb clean me up, but Seb was definitely more careful, helping me get dressed, adjusting my pillows and giving my face little kisses. "Daddy's very proud of you, baby." He said, making me giggle like a fool. "You make such a cute couple." Jake mocked us, before leaning to kiss my lips, wrapping his hand around my throat. "You know what, honey? It's okay if you choose him, as long as I get to fuck you like this sometimes." "Why do you keep insisting on that?" I rolled my eyes and snuggled closer to Sebastian. "I'm too tired to make a choice now." "We can repeat that as many times as you need, so you can decide." Seb added. "No pressure." "What if I enjoy having two daddies?" I shrugged.

[heartau]

Unknown Number | C.HW

Genre: college!au - explicit smut/angst/fluff Word count: 16.8k Comments: this is a revision of an au that i wrote from when i was in a different fandom!! Warnings: graphic depictions of sex: fingering, oral (male and female), insertion, dirty talk, public sex, dom/sub themes.

In which two anonymous people sext each other, neither one aware that the other is their sworn enemy.

Commonly, at the ages of the early twenties, partying becomes an event that is scheduled almost every single week. Crammed bodies that emit heat, slick with sweat, sticking against each other on dance floors packed like sardines and in secret affairs tucked away in random quarters; the turbulent howling of frat boys who have found the beer keg and are attempting to sacrifice their weakest link to down it all in one gulp; almosts and maybes and hindered exchanges that stay sputtering in the stomachs of those who leave early filled with regret. A party is everything aggravating that stirs up irritation put into one area under the façade of something whimsical, and it is all worth it – until the morning after.

The dull, throbbing pain that bangs against your skull causes your eyelids to flutter open, the harsh sunlight that flows into your bedroom through the drawn curtains triggering the torment to grow worse as it fries your retinas, screwing your eyes shut as you let out a groan of agony, sore arms flying up to rest your hands against your forehead and to massage your temples.

“My head,” you hiss in pain, gulping the urge to curse loudly at yourself for deciding to drink so much the night before down your throat. A low chuckle emits from the side of your room which causes your body to jolt in surprise, turning your head and barely peeking out from underneath your eyelids at the origin of the sound, seeing your roommate leaning against the doorframe, trying to suppress his laughter. “Jesus, Kihyun. Knock next time.”

“You’ve been asleep for fifteen hours, I came to check if you were still alive.” Kihyun explains, walking towards you and holding out what you’ve made out to be a single pill of tylenol and a glass of water. “I told you to be careful with your drinks last night, you know.”

You slowly sit up, rolling your eyes as you leans against your headboard, graciously accepting the pill and water and downing it in one gulp. Your esophagus feels less dry and you relish in the fleeting moment of peace before another strike of pain emits in your skull and sends jolts of agony down your bones and nerves. You wince once more, closing your eyes.

“What happened last night?” you ask your roommate, attempting to recollect your memories of the night before in the darkness behind your eyelids but coming up blank.

“You got drunk,” Kihyun answers you, hands shoved into his pockets as if he were looking for something. “Then, after your 5th shot or whatever, you told me you were going to the bathroom. You were gone for, like, 50 minutes, so I tried phoning you to see where you were, but my phone was gone! Luckily, I found you on the floor next to the ladies bathroom,” he pauses and then lifts up his phone - his shattered phone - to your face. “Next to this.”

His eyes are sharp, pointed directly at you as you gulp and shrink down in confused guilt before an apologetic smile attempts to stretch on your face. “I’m sorry?”

“You should say that to the people you texted,” Kihyun shrugs, shoving his phone back into his pocket and crossing his arms. “You messaged every single person off of my contacts list. Your phone’s been going off for the past fifteen hours while you’ve been asleep.”

Your eyes widen. “Oh shit.”

“Oh shit, indeed.”

You reach for your phone on your nightstand and press the circular button rousing the device awake, and sure enough, your lockscreen is decorated with rows and rows of text notifications, each one coming from a different combination of numbers. An array of Who is this?, Wrong number., and If this is some sort of prank, please stop. It’s not funny’s causes your face to redden, putting your phone down onto your lap and covering your face in embarrassment.

“Please don’t tell anyone it was me,” you look back up at Kihyun, unlocking your phone and tapping on your text app, already conjuring apologies to the strangers.

“Your secret is safe with me. Have fun!” he reassures you, before pivoting on his heel and walking out your room, closing the door behind him.

Gulping, your eyes skim the texts that you decided to send from the night before, harsh and erratic words meeting your eyes. You groan in despair as you read each reply, tones of anger and confusion aimed at you - you had a lot to work with, and thankfully, you had the entire rest of the day to contemplate remorseful apologies. But deep within your notifications lies a reply different from the rest, rich words that hold sentiment and persona, lined in several sentences. The reply was from an unknown number, of course it was, but you can’t deny the peculiarity of the message.

And thus, almost apologetically, you leave it unanswered for the time being.

 ----

  “No, dude, I swear on my life, I got the freakiest text message last night.”

Kihyun opens the dorm room to the sound of dispute, Jooheon’s voice being the loudest of all of them. Groans emit from around the corner and Kihyun could practically envision eyes rolling at the boys statement.

“I read the text,” Minhyuk says after a pause. “It wasn’t freaky at all.”

“Yes it was!” Jooheon argues, scrambling to grab his phone from underneath the mountain of review sheets and textbooks, hands practically shaking as he unlocks it, tapping his text app. He holds his phone to his friend’s faces, who lean in to inspect the text, before they all stare at him, deadpan.

“I told you so.” Minhyuk quips, shrugging his shoulders.

“Okay, so you tell me. If you got a text that just said 5 days. and nothing else - absolutely zilch - you wouldn’t be afraid?” Jooheon narrows his eyes at Minhyuk, but before Minhyuk could even begin to open his mouth to answer back in dripping sarcasm, Kihyun sits down on the floor and slams his books against the carpet, looking at them in curiosity.

“What’s going on?” asks Kihyun as he shuffles his papers around, looking for the review sheet he had been analyzing for the past few days.

“This random number texted us in the middle of the night,” Minhyuk answers Kihyun, before pointing towards Jooheon, who stares directly at his phone. “He’s afraid because the same number texted him 5 days.”

“A random number?” asks Kihyun, brain reeling as he realizes that it must have been (Y/N), but his face stays static at the apparent discovery. “Hm. That’s weird. What else did you guys get?”

“They copy and pasted an entire WikiHow article on how to bake banana bread for me.” Wonho pipes up from beside Jooheon. “It was kinda helpful. I think I might do it later.”

“I got a whole paragraph on how I’m obstructing their education by being loud in our shared class. Like, what does that even mean?” Minhyuk is obviously irritated at this message, furrowing his brows together. “I’m not even that loud. And what shared class?”

A sigh emits from Hyungwon, who has been silent for the past few minutes. He stares at his textbook, flipping through the pages as he talks. “I don’t know why you guys are over analyzing this. It’s just some person pranking us, it’s not that big of a deal.”

Kihyun almost freezes at the new insight, turning his head towards the lanky boy who he knows shares a venomous and strained relationship with (Y/N), internally yelling at the girl for acting so brash through her drunken actions.

“You got a text?” Kihyun asks him, voice surprisingly calm, however, behind the facade lies an expression almost synonymous to hellfire. Hyungwon’s mouth remains closed, eyes tearing away from the printed words of his textbook and towards his older friend. His expression is still, and his eyes are calm, but it is everything Kihyun needs to confirm that he is one of the receivers.

“Really?” Minhyuk questions. “What did it say?”

“What the text said isn’t important,” Hyungwon glances at Minhyuk quickly before looking back to his textbook. “Can we please just get on with studying? That’s what I came here for.”

“Hey man,” Jooheon pouts, practically sending Hyungwon a pleading expression. “You can’t just say you got a text and not tell us!”

“Yeah, he’s right!” Wonho points at Jooheon. “We’re your friends. You’re like… legally obligated to tell us.”

Hyungwon lets out a huff, biting the inside of his cheeks before looking back up at his circle of friends. “They sent me a long, long essay on why they hate me.”

Silence fills the air and Kihyun can sense tension following just behind as they all stare at Hyungwon. It’s only a fleeting moment before they all burst out into roaring laughter, tears threatening to fall from their brightened eyes as they double over on top of each other. Kihyun and Hyungwon watch the two in confusion before Kihyun decides to let out a couple of strained, awkward chuckles.

“Hey,” Kihyun clears his throat and pats Hyungwon on the back as the rest of the boys’ laughter dies down. “Like you said, it’s most likely just a prank, right?”

Hyungwon doesn’t even look at Kihyun in the eye, shrugging as he mumbles out a silent ‘yes.’ Minhyuk takes notice of this, pointing at Hyungwon in shock.

“Oh my god, he’s offended by the text,” Minhyuk says. “It must’ve been personal then, huh? They probably know you in real life. Oh my god, how funny would that be?”

Hyungwon rolls his eyes before looking back at his textbook, letting out a huff of air as he attempts to drown out the sounds of his friends.

Kihyun turns to Minhyuk, racking his brain for excuses. “There’s a low chance they know each other in real life,” Kihyun says. “I mean, that would be impossible.”

“Wait, but Minhyuk has a point,” Jooheon adds. “I mean, whoever this was, they texted all of us, right? They must know who we are. It just comes down to figuring out who it is.”

“Why are we still talking about this?” Hyungwon shuts his book, the plop of the hardcovers interrupting Minhyuk and Jooheon. “I came here to study, not analyze and dissect some girl’s cryptic text messages.”

Minhyuk raises an eyebrow. “Girl?”

Hyungwon freezes and Kihyun is almost about to crack, but luckily, Hyungwon opens his mouth before Kihyun could do anything. “She said something about how she hates the ‘girls can’t beat up boys’ stereotype because she claims that she could take me down easy.”

“Well,” Minhyuk says. “She’s got a point.”

“Shut up, Minhyuk.” Hyungwon glares at him, patience already begin to waver thin.

“I’m kidding, I’m kidding,” Minhyuk throws his hands up in defense. “But hey. This is strong evidence. Whoever this masked texter is, they know us and they’re a girl. We’re a few steps closer to figuring out who the culprit is.”

Kihyun scratches the back of his neck as he remains silent, searching for a coherent sentence in his brain. “Well. Let’s stu-”

“Hey, Minhyuk,” Wonho looks up towards his friend from his position on the ground, laying on his stomach. “You said that you guys shared a class right? They could be in any one of your classes.”

“Oh my god… you’re right,” Minhyuk agrees. “I’ll question ever-”

Hyungwon interrupts him by noisily grabbing his papers and books, standing up and earning confused looks from his friends. He pivots on his heel and walks towards the door, turning the doorknob and opening it just a crack before looking over his shoulder. “I’m glad all of you have unanimously agreed to fail our finals. Since we aren’t studying, I’ll be taking my leave.”

The door slams shut, leaving the four boys in his wake.

“Geez.” Minhyuk scoffs, before continuing with his sentence prior to Hyungwon leaving.

As Hyungwon walks out the apartment lobby, the crisp cool autumn breeze dancing across the skin of his cheeks after he opens the door, his teeth clench in annoyance as the memories of the text messages he had received flash in his mind. He closes his eyes momentarily, before opening them again, hiking back to his own apartment complex, attempting to push the situation out of his mind.

Yet, no matter how much he seeks to overlook his feelings of irritation, he can still detect the weight of his phone in the pocket of his sweater, where the messages filled of anger and tirancy of an unknown woman linger on the screen the same way they linger in his memory.

He will delete them. After one more message.

 ----

 Your phone emits a loud tone, causing your eyes to widen as heads in the library turn to look towards you. You quickly grab it to silence it, sending everyone apologetic smiles and glances before looking down at your screen at the text notification, raising your eyebrow once you realized whom it had originated from. That morning, while you had been apologizing to a series of confusion and states of anger, you had come across one reply a lot different than the rest; a paragraph filled with words of true irritation, personal anger, and you, in your hungover galore, decided to leave it be, finding entertainment in their message.

From - Unknown Number: so u texted my friends too. who are u?

You furrowed your eyebrows together as you scroll up to find your original text to try and figure out who this person could be - obviously, you must have some sort of connection with them or a similarity for his emotional outburst prior his recent message - but as you scroll up you are only given a dead end when you realized you must have deleted your first text while you was still drunk.

You sent: first of all thx for texting me while im in the library im p sure the librarian is on my ass now. second, i was drunk so it was probably nonsense. third of all thats for me to know and for u to never find out.

You put your phone down and pick up your pencil, finding the paragraph you were last reading, but before your pencil could even reach the lined paper of your notebook, your phone buzzes again. You look at the screen, seeing that the unknown man has replied to your message.

From - Unknown Number: whatever. just dont text me anymore. if u got smth personal to say then say it to my face and stop hiding behind a screen like a coward.

You sigh, setting your pencil down and picking your phone up.

You sent: mister u were the one who texted me today first. also arent u basically doing the same thing? if u’ve got something to say then come say it to my face.

From - Unknown Number: i dont even know who u are. just apologize.

You sent: no. goodbye.

From - Unknown Number: whatever. just lay off. i already got enough things to stress about.

You sent: i said goodbye.

You stare at your phone for what seems like an eternity, waiting for him to reply, but he doesn’t. You close your eyes almost thankfully, sighing before you delete the entire text conversation and shove your phone into your bag and dismiss everything before you continue to study. You had believed, foolishly, that this man never contacts you again.

You were wrong.

From - Unknown Number: hey should i buy pizza

You hold a spatula in your other hand, the sound of eggs frying filling the kitchen. It’s only the next morning and this unknown man had apparently not forgotten about your number and decided to ignore your farewell. You sigh, the inkling of regret that you had after discovering that you had texted multitudes of strangers becoming even bigger.

You sent: didn’t i say goodbye to u already

From - Unknown Number: yeah but like … im hungry

You roll your eyes as you flip an egg over in the steaming pan.

You sent: then text ur friends

From - Unknown Number: u see…. i got into a fight with them

You sent: wow. im so surprised.

From - Unknown Number: so should i buy pizza or not hurry up i got class in like 30 mins n if im late my teachers gonna bite my ass

You sent: dont buy pizza its still morning … buy a bagel or smth

From - Unknown Number: good idea. k thx.. good bye

You sigh before you dismiss him again, putting your phone face down on the counter as you slide your eggs off the pan onto a plate before stepping into the dining room to eat with Kihyun. You hadn’t seen him since he had left to go to Wonho’s apartment, a burly, intimidating looking man whom he had befriended in his psychology class. He looked down at his plate, taking few, sparse bites out of his bacon before he jumps at the sound of your chair scraping against the hardwood floors, sitting down across from him.

“You seem a bit jumpy today,” you quirk an eyebrow at your best friend. “Is something wrong?”

“No!” he says, far too quickly. “Not at all!”

“Kihyun,” you question after a beat, furrowing your eyebrows. “What’s wrong?”

Kihyun gulps, staring at his plate of bacon and rice before letting out a short sigh, setting his spoon and fork down and putting his hands in his lap.

“Remember when you texted a bunch off people off my contacts list?” his voice is low.

“Yeah? It just happened yesterday.”

“Well, um,” he sputters. “You texted Wonho, Jooheon, Minhyuk, and-” his voice lowers even more, becoming hushed as if he’s afraid to see your reacton. “Hyungwon.”

You automatically stand up, wide-eyed, jaw slack as you watch your friend’s face turn from fear to worry, waving at you as if to tell you to keep your temper in check and pulling you back to sit down.

It isn’t that you are afraid of Hyungwon, because it’s the direct opposite. The simple sound of his name causes a specific type of vexation to rise up in your bloodstream, and the two of you being in the same area brings concern to other people. It’s known all over campus that the two of you share hostile feelings towards each other, ever since you had caught him so blatantly cheating off your first pop quiz during the beginning of the semester - you weren’t the only person to catch him too, as your teacher called the two of you up to the front, believing you were allowing him copy off of you, and much to your demise, gave the two of you the automatic grades of zero. He never even apologized to you, the blatant difference in your statistics class’ grade so drastic from your other classes thanks to him.

“And what did I send him?” you ask Kihyun.

“He said that you sent him a long paragraph on why you hated him.”

You find yourself letting out dark chuckles, hands wrapping around your spoon and fork as you begin to work on your plate of eggs.

“Maybe drunk me had a point.” you say to a stunned Kihyun.

Soon, you find yourself forgetting about those text messages you shared that morning with the unknown man as well as your conversation with Kihyun, instead directing your focus on a word problem as you sit in your statistics class. The environment is quiet, much to your bliss, as you find that a perfect work setting to analyze problems in. But as they say, the universe only brings you the opposite of what you want, and on the other side of the closed door, someone knocks fervently and loudly, earning gasps of shock from other students are you.

“Mr. Chae,” your professor sighs. “You’re late. Again.”

You look up to see Hyungwon marching into class, a coffee in one hand and a small paper bag in the other. He meets eyes with you and you find yours rolling at the direct contact before looking back down to focus on your word problem. Minutes pass by and you’re on your next question, a much more difficult one, and you find yourself stumped as you rack your brain for an answer.

You hear a loud crackling a few desks away, but you ignore it.

You hear it again, this time a bit longer, but before you could turn around to see who it was, it stopped.

Just as your brain figured out a way to solve the question, the crackling continues once more, even louder and even longer. You turn around to find the culprit the sound originates from, and you find Hyungwon, just a few seats behind you, halfway into sinking his teeth into a bagel, the crinkly bag of paper he used to carry it to class now disposed of in a tiny ball on top of his textbook. He notices you turn around to look at him, sending you sharp eyes lined with venom before continuing to bite down into his bagel and chewing rather loudly. You turn back around, attempting to ignore the camel-like sounds from behind you letting out a huff of annoyance, every trace of the answer that was in your mind long gone. How he hasn’t been kicked out of this class yet is beyond you.

You sent: i need an idea for an essay

It’s currently 9:45 in the evening, and you sit at your desk chair with your laptop open on Google docs, and it seems as if you’ve been static since the clock hit nine. Kihyun was out volunteering at an overnight camp for troubled teenagers (“I have to go or else I’ll fail psychology,” he had said before leaving with a small gym bag packed with his clothes. “I don’t even know why I have to take psychology. I’m in the culinary field for christ’s sake!”), thus you were alone in your small two bedroom apartment, the only thing accompanying you is the ticking of the clock in the kitchen and the gentle thrum of the heater.

From - Unknown Number: i thought we weren’t gonna text each other anymore

His reply came rather quickly, you were a bit surprised - but nonetheless, you were desperate. You cursed yourself for leaving your criminology assignment until last minute - it’s due the next day, 8:00 AM sharp.

You sent: i know but its due in like 11 hours and i dont have a prompt so i dont have any idea how to start this and if i dont get it in then im done for

From - Unknown Number: what course??

You sent: criminology

From - Unknown Number: hmm……. prompt?

You sent: theres no prompt my professor said to just write anything. like literally anything that has to do with crim and im having the biggest brainfart

From - Unknown Number: how about police misconduct? or u could write abt the rights of defendants. or like… the concepts of conduct and causation.

You sent: omg………………….ur a life saver

From - Unknown Number: i know

You end up finishing your essay in only four hours, submitting it to your professor and closing your laptop and climbing into bed, stretching out your limbs and letting out a large yawn. You stare at your ceiling for what seems like hours before you sit up, grabbing your phone and unlocking it, your conversation with the unknown man appearing on your screen. You deliberate whether or not you should or shouldn’t, the blinking line next to the body of words almost mocking you, and you think, why the hell not?, before you hit send.

You sent: i just finished. thank you again. good night.

His reply came only seconds later.

From - Unknown Number: of course. sleep well.

You smile at the text for only a second before you quickly wipe it off your face, remembering that this man is a stranger, and no matter how nice he was being to you, he was still unknown. You let out a sigh as you delete the conversation, clicking your phone off and plugging it in to charge it, setting it face down on your bedside table. You stare at the ceiling, sleepiness beginning to coat your eyes, your last thoughts before drifting off are to never text him again.

You find it hard though, because the next morning, he texted you a hearty good morning!, and before you could even stop yourself, you texted him a good morning back. You find yourself replying to every text message he sends you, and even though you remind yourself to never text him again, that this message will be the last one, you still come up with a reply, hitting send before you could stop your thumbs from hitting the cold screen.

By and by, the heated debates that the two of you had started from had evolved into friendlier conversations filled with more personal details. You ask him heaps of questions; whether you should use the last of your paycheck to buy a book or to get more clothes, thus beginning a long conversation on the quality of clothing and store brands. He tells you to treat yourself to a high-end brand, which you found yourself scoffing at - but you find yourself walking to school just a few days later with a new knit cardigan, the designer label almost shining off the collar.

He asks you what your favourite television show is, leading to hours and hours of lists of recommendations and reviews of series and movies both on and off Netflix, conversing over plots, genres and pairings. He tells you that he loves comedy sitcoms, and reality shows, and you tell him your favourite genre, much to his akin. You tell him your favourite genre of music, and he tells you that his is EDM and R&B. He tells you his favourite shade is black, and you tell him the colour that you are most fond of. You learn that he has a deathly fear of spiders, and he learns of what lurks in your brain when your bedroom is dark and silent. He learns that you’ve never gone travelling, and you learn that he’s been to almost all of the continents of the Earth. You tell him your favourite time of day, and he tells you his; nine in the evening, when the sun has gone to rest and the stars decorate the sky in glimmering valour.

You joke, you bond, you laugh for what seemed like only days, to the point where the two of you hadn’t realized how long it had been since you both actually started talking. He’s the first one to text you in the morning, and the last to text you at night. He’s the first you text when you’ve got a problem, and the first to text when you’ve got nothing else to do. And even though he’s never asked for your name, he knows you; what you like, what you don’t like, what you aspire to be, and what you fear.

“Ms. (Y/L/N),” your professor speaks loudly, earning glances towards your way as you tear your eyes from your phone screen and back towards the front of the class. Your professor stands with her hands on her hips. “If you have something better to do, then I advise you to leave my class.”

“I’m sorry,” you apologize, setting your phone down. “It won’t happen again.”

You hear a snicker not too far away from you, and you already know who it’s originated from, your face already beginning to heat up rage as you push down the urge to turn around, hop over the desks and deck Hyungwon in the face.

“Please answer word problem number four for the class, miss (Y/L/N).” your teacher tells you, looking at you expectantly over the top of her glasses. You gulp, looking down at your workbook as you read the said question, cursing to yourself in your head for not knowing what it means and for not focusing in class. Minutes of awkward silence passes by quickly, but to you it feels like eons before you hear Hyungwon’s arrogant voice cut through the air.

“I can answer it for her, professor!” he says, gleefully. You can almost see his haughty smile lingering in his words. “Of the given data set, the median is 75, the first quartile is 69, the third quartile is 81, and the interquartile range is 81, which you subtract 69 from, which gives us 12.”  

“Very good, Mr. Chae,” your professor nods and you ball your hands into fists. “Perhaps you should not only teach Miss (Y/L/N) the foundation of statistics, but also to focus during class.”

And with that, she turns back around on her heel and flips a page, continuing with her lecture. You turn around to find where Hyungwon is sitting a few seats back, a smug smirk on his face before he looks back at his notebook, jotting down notes. You tell yourself to calm down, to not let this situation take over your temper - and you do such as, but your fists stay clenched.

From - Unknown Number: so how was ur day?

You read the message as you unlock your front door, using your foot to kick it open.

You sent: terrible. how was urs?

You hang your keys on the keyholder beside the door and kick off your shoes, walking into the living room and finding it empty - Kihyun must still be working at the cafeteria. You set your bag down on the floor and look through the fridge, letting out a soft sigh of relief after finding a wrapped plate of food your best friend had left you before leaving. You put it into the microwave and punch out the numbers before leaning on your counter as you wait, pulling out your phone and seeing that the unknown man has replied.

From - Unknown Number: oh im so sorry… ah my day was fine! i finally got to prove myself to this girl i detest… i felt super cool

You furrow your brow as you read it, the first thing you think of was of what happened during statistics with Hyungwon. Your stomach drops for a second - what if you were texting Hyungwon? The beeping of the microwave snaps you out of your thoughts, and you shake your head as you click the microwave open, grabbing your plate. That would be impossible - this man is far too coherent, smart, funny and kind to be Hyungwon.

No, it can’t be Hyungwon at all. That would be absolutely impossible.

It was as if he had heard your thoughts though, because your phone buzzed again.

From - Unknown Number: by the way… am i ever going to know your name?

You read the message over a few times, dread setting in your stomach. You had already shared far too much information about yourself to this unknown man, he knows more about you than Kihyun does - you had been using him as a way to vent. You felt terrible thinking about it, but you were far too afraid to take things to the next level, even if it just meant knowing each other’s names; you loathed feeling vulnerable, and it feels much better to do it anonymously.

You sent: hm… i kinda like it better this way. us being anonymous.

From - Unknown Number: good. because i do too.

You smile as you read his answer, grabbing your fork and stabbing the pieces of lasagna off your plate and scooping them into your mouth. You were glad he felt the same way - perhaps he felt the same way because he thought the same way as you did.

You sent: oh yeah btw what was the first thing i sent u? i deleted everything while i was drunk so now i cant read any of the msgs i sent u that first night

From - Unknown Number: like. the very FIRST thing or… the very first few things

You sent: the very FIRST thing.

From - Unknown Number: you sent me “what are you wearing?” were u trying to like.. find me somewhere or smth?

Your scan the message that you had apparently sent before widening your eyes at the sudden realization, your face heating up in humiliation. Quickly, you type a reply.

You sent: oh my god……. i think i was trying to sext u

There was a brief pause before you saw the three dots pop up again.

From - Unknown Number: oh

You inwardly cringe.

You sent: PLEASE IM SO SORRY I WAS DRUNK it wont happen again i promise pls dont be mad at me

From - Unknown Number: omg no!!! im not mad at u.. im just …. beating myself up for being stupid

You sent: you’re not stupid at all omg ! i can see where u thought it sounded like i was looking for u…

From - Unknown Number: BUT THATS NOT A NICE WAY TO PRANK SOMEONE YOU KNOW

You sent: who said it was a prank?

You weren’t thinking when you sent it, but the millisecond after you hit send a wave of panic courses through you. This was it, this is the end of your new-found friendship with this anonymous man; he was going to track your number down and then figure out who you are and show the entirety of the internet about your texts and then humiliate you. You sit there, thinking of the worst, but your vibrating phone brings you back to clarity.

From - Unknown Number: what do u mean?

You blink at his response. But then again, you hadn’t been pleasured in that field for a very long time, and this man is anonymous - he won’t have anything to use against you. You think of having your own fun while he texts you, and plus, if anything goes wrong, you could always just block his number. Plus, sex is a safe-ground; no feelings, no emotions, no ties - just strict, pure physical lust.

Right?

Fuck it.

You sent: what are you wearing?

 ----

 He is half certain that this is a joke, and, the other half is him hoping it isn’t. He wonders just how he got this unknown woman, whom three weeks ago he was just arguing against, to break through his skin defences to make him feel this way. He thinks about lying, telling the woman that he isn’t interested, that he wants emotional ties - but the last time he’s been with someone more than a year ago, and he’s already growing tired of handling things by himself, plus, his roommate, Changkyun, is out babysitting, leaving the house all to himself for the night.

Hyungwon gulps.

Fuck it.

Hyungwon sent: my pajamas

Hyungwon cringes to himself. He’s not the best at sexting, he doesn’t have much experience in it. There is a beat that hangs in the air for a second before three dots appear indicating that the woman has thought of a response.

From - Angry Girl: ………………. is that all?

Hyungwon sent: well…. yeah? u asked me what im wearing n i told u what im wearing… what do u want me to say

From - Angry Girl: dude have u never sexted before????

Hyungwon sent: i mean ….. its straightforward right ??? like …… i mean how else do u describe what ur doin .

From - Angry Girl: no !!!!! jesus … i should have expected this considering u thought i was looking for u when i asked u what u were wearing . the entire point of sexting is to get the other person aroused ….. how do u expect me to get aroused when u just sent me the most unarousing sext in history?????

Hyungwon scoffs at his phone, a bit insulted, fingers moving fast to type a reply, but before he could finish his phone buzzes with another message.

From - Angry Girl: get me to imagine what u look like w like …. extremities here n there. if i told u i was sitting here in shirt stained with lasagna would tht turn u on?

Hyungwon sent: well……………….no

From - Angry Girl: but if i told u i’m wearing a matching set of lacy black lingerie underneath my shirt with panties slowly getting soaked at the thought of you?

Hyungwon sent: oh

Hyungwon is far too busy staring at his phone, jaw slacked and eyes widened, for a few long seconds, that he forgets to sext her back. His phone buzzes, jolting him back into reality.

From - Angry Girl: hey.. we dont have to do this if u dont want to. i dont wanna make u uncomfy.

Hyungwon rushes to type in a reply.

Hyungwon sent: nooonooo!!

Hyungwon sent: no noo… !!!!

Hyungwon sent: its . just … like

Hyungwon sent: r u actually wet?

Her reply comes instantaneously.

From - Angry Girl: yes

Hyungwon sucks in a breath as he reads the text over and over again. He thinks of the fact that somewhere out there is a woman, who he has never met, and how she’s wet for him. The first thing Hyungwon does is screw his eyes closed in attempt to recollect his thoughts, which turns out to be horrible pain, because the moment his eyes shut, he thinks of her - see-through top clinging against her curves, her thighs squeezing together, her eyes filled with lust and her plump lips slightly parted - he thinks of (Y/N).

He quickly opens his eyes, cursing at himself for even conjuring up an image like that in his head, but the soft strain in his crotch area begs him to differ.

From - Angry Girl: so... what r u wearing

Hyungwon sent: white tee, black sweats and black boxers

From - Angry Girl: hmmm...

Hyungwon sent: are u touching urself?

From - Angry Girl: damn u learn fast

Hyungwon sent: are u touching urself?, he repeats, upper teeth pressed into his bottom lip harshly as the strain in his sweats begins to tighten.

From - Angry Girl: i have been ever since u told me u were in ur pajamas

Hyungwon grins, shifting positions on his bed.

Hyungwon sent: i thought tht was unarousing???

From - Angry Girl: it was. i just havent gotten fucked in a year

He licks his bottom lip as he types out a reply, his other hand fumbling with the waistband if his boxers before pulling them down. He double checks if his bedroom door is locked before he rests his back against the headboard, hands finding their way towards his cock.

Hyungwon sent: good. save urself for me then.

He begins to pump his hand up and down his shaft, slowly at first, as he waits for her to reply.

From - Angry Girl: jesus 

From - Angry Girl: ur touching urself rn arent u? thinking abt how wet i am for yuo hmm??? do u wnat me as mcuh as i want you?

The typos in her sentence only brings more excitement to Hyungwon, picking up the speed of his hand wrapped around his length, biting down on his lip as he thinks of her, with her hands buried into her panties, back arched off of her bed, her other hand finding it just as important to write a reply.

Hyungwon sent: yes ido. i want you so bad

From - Angry Girl: are u gna cum soon? i want ur cum sobad. i want allof it inside me, i want u fillme up until its drippign out of me

That was enough to send Hyungwon over the edge, the straining knot that formed in his stomach untying itself as he releases, his groans reverberating against the walls of his room as his hips jerk against his hand. He closes his eyes, leaning his head against his headboard, reeling from his orgasm before he reaches over to his nightstand and cleans up the mess. Hurriedly, he types his reply, wanting to make things amazing for her as she did for him.

And as he does so, he thinks of her.

Hyungwon sent: god i wanna kiss ur neck and ur jaw and litter it with marks to show everyone that ur mine. i wanna move ur hands away from u and replace ur fingers w mine and have u ride them, hitting the right spot as i kiss u all over ur body and tell u how good u are to me. i want my name to be the only thing coming out of ur mouth. i want u to cum.

He sets his phone down, biting into his cheeks as anxiousness begins to roll over him. He isn’t sure if that sentence was good enough - this is his first time sexting. In addition, he hadn’t realized until now that he had been imagining (Y/N) doing all of this, and what shocked him the most was that he liked what he imagined. Like it a little too much, in fact.

His phone buzzes against his thigh.

From - Angry Girl: holy fuck

From - Angry Girl: shit i literally think i saw god when i came

He chuckles lightly, typing his reply.

Hyungwon sent: im glad to be of service to u!

He sits in silence for a few seconds, unsure of what to say, but then begins to type another message.

Hyungwon sent: what does this make us?

He wasn’t up for a relationship with a person he’s never met, even if they know almost everything about each other. He doesn’t even know what she looks like, or her name - but he does know that he wants emotion. He craves for it, no matter what form it’s given in, and this is the closet he has gotten to any type of emotion in almost a year.

From - Angry Girl: hmmm friends w benefits? but thru text... ?

Hyungwon sent: i like the sound of tht. you wanna do this again sometime?

From - Angry Girl: yes please

Hyungwon sent: good.. me too.

Just as he sends it, Hyungwon hears the front door begin to jiggle, announcing that Changkyun is just now arriving home. Hurriedly, he unlocks his door in case he were to come in and turns off his night lamp, jumping into bed just as he hears the door open and the sound of Changkyun kicking off his shoes. God knows how fast the younger boy would put together what Hyungwon had been doing prior.

Hyungwon: good night. try not to dream of me

Hyungwon sets his phone on the nightstand and quickly pretends to be asleep just as he hears Changkyun’s footsteps bounding towards his door, turning the doorknob and peeking in to check if he was still awake. When the door closes and when Hyungwon is sure that his roommate has fled to the kitchen, he turns over in his bed, staring at the ceiling.

Before sleep takes hold of him, he thinks one last thing.

How the fuck is he going to face (Y/N) now?

 ----

 You did dream of him.

Chae Hyungwon, to be exact.

Since putting your phone down the night before, to waking up from a sinful dream and showering and cooking your breakfast, you have been red in the face. You hadn’t realized you were fantasizing about him until the unknown man’s last text was sent, when you arched your back from your bed as you came undone between your legs and whined out Hyungwon’s name. You had avoided eye contact with Kihyun, aware that he knows you far too well and fearing for him to realize what you have done.

“Your class doesn’t start for another h-“ Kihyun’s voice rings from the living room but is interrupted with the click of your front door.

The air is cool, the chilled breeze kisses your cheeks as you walk to campus, hands shoved inside your pockets, playing with the edge of your phone case that was situated inside of them. Last night’s events were amazing - it was the best orgasm you’ve ever had in a long time - yet the fact that he had been in your mind the entire time made your stomach twist in an emotion you can’t quite pinpoint.

You make it to your class, only to be met with a closed door. Of course, it wasn’t starting for another half hour. You let out a tired sigh, taking your backpack off and sitting down in the hallway, back against the wall as you fish your phone from your pocket.

You text him first today.

You sent: good morning

His reply comes quickly.

From - Unknown Number: good morning!! ur up early

You sent: i guess i still have adrenaline from what happened last night hehe

You sent: so what are u up to?

From - Unknown Number: im in the line at starbucks on my uni campus rn ... i might get a red velvet cookie. the class im heading to is like the perfect environment to eat

You sent: i didnt know environments counted in a good eating experience

From - Unknown Number: of course it does!!!! a good environment makes ur food even more savoury.

From - Unknown Number: i have acquired the cookie. im on my way to class now ... absolute dread

You sent: man .... u and me both

He doesn’t answer for a few seconds and you figure it’s because he’s walking or he bumped into a friend or something, so you use this time to get some extra sleep, laying your head against the wall and closing your eyes. Just as you are about to drift off, you hear the sound of someone clearing their throat down the hall, and you open your eyes, hoping it was your professor.

Oh god.

Hyungwon walks towards you in his usual gait, full of arrogance, holding a cup of iced coffee in one hand and a paper bag in the other. This time though, when you look at him, you don’t feel the same irritation that you have always felt - and suddenly your eyes catch sight of his fingers, and your mind flashes to the images that your brain had thought of just the night before. Your face turns red, looking away from him and closing your eyes. You hope to god he doesn’t notice your red face, which he doesn’t, because he barely spares a glance at you.

“Are you kidding me,” he curses upon arriving to the door. “The day I come in early, the door isn’t even open yet.”

Grumbling, he sits down against the wall a few meters away from you, putting his iced coffee and paper bag on the ground beside him as he fishes for his phone from the pocket of his jeans.

You feel your phone buzz.

From - Unknown Number: quick i might have enough time bc the professor isnt here yet...... should i go back to starbucks and buy a muffin

You let out a laugh, earning a glance from Hyungwon to which your face turns flat again, rolling your eyes at him.

You sent: no!!! what if ur running to starbucks n u pass by ur professor?

From - Unknown Number: you’re right you’re right.....ill jus get it later then

You sit like that for what seems like a good half-hour, texting this unknown man back and forth and learning even more about each other. You learn that he loves baked goods, and that recently, ever since you had told him to buy himself a bagel, his love for them had come back. He learns that you cook your own breakfast everyday, taking the time to eat and rest in the morning before the rest of the day ensues.

“Hyungwon!” a loud voice sounds from the end of the hallway. You turn your head, as does Hyungwon, and you find the man the voice originated from, dashing down the hallway.

Lee Minhyuk was in your criminology class, you knew him well because he in front of you, but not well enough to contact him at any time, or to say hi to him outside of class. He was a nice guy, he was friends with almost everybody in your university no matter what year they were in, but he was loud and distracted you from your work - you aren’t sure if you’re thankful for that or if you detest that fact.

“Minhyuk.” Hyungwon’s voice is calm, rivalling Minhyuk’s shout.

Minhyuk comes to a stop in front of Hyungwon, doubled over and his hands on his knees as be gasps for breath - you are unsure as to why, the length of hall he had just ran doesn’t even stretch on for that long.

“Where have you been?” Minhyuk asks between gasps. “I haven’t seen you since our last study session.”

“Oh you know,” Hyungwon replies, “Just studying.”

“Well come back, our study group needs y-“ his voice cuts off the moment his head turns and meets eyes with you, eyes widening and mouth forming a large grin. “Hi (Y/N)!”

You give him a smile back, letting out a gentle laugh. “Hello, Minhyuk.”

He decides to ditch Hyungwon, walking over to you instead as his taller friend watches on in a mix of confusion and shock, and finally, for the first time since you’ve seen him today, his eyes catches yours. You suck in a quick breath before looking back at Minhyuk.

“How’d you do on your paper?” Minhyuk asks, standing in front of you, hands shoved into his pockets. “I feel like I barely made the passing mark.”

“Oh! It was good, I finished it really fast the night before it was due,” you let out a chuckle. “I wrote it on police misconduct.”

“Oh gosh,” Minhyuk says. “You’re gonna get a good grade, lord knows how many times our professor rants about that topic.”

“One can only hope.” you joke, face falling and hand touching your heart before you break out into a smile. You could almost feel Hyungwon’s eyes burning holes into your body.

“Oh, hey, by the way,” Minhyuk pipes up after both of your laughter died down. “I have a question that I’ve been meaning to ask for a few weeks.”

You raise an eyebrow, curious. “Yeah? What is it?”

“Around three weeks ago, did you happen to get a strange te-“

“Mr. Chae, and Miss (Y/L/N)! You’re here early!”

The three of you turn your heads and find your professor striding down the hallway, fishing out the keys to the locked door in her purse. You turn to Minhyuk with a quirked eyebrow as to ask him to continue his sentence, but he just shakes his head.

“It’s alright, I’ll just ask you the next time I see you, alright?” Minhyuk shoots two thumbs-up at you, before pivoting on his heel and patting Hyungwon on the shoulder, narrowing his eyes at him teasingly. “And you. Stop ignoring us.”

Hyungwon nods, a small smile on his face before the two of you turn and walk inside your class. The only people present were the of you as well as the professor, who had also decided to go get something from the staff room, leaving you and Hyungwon alone, once again, in her wake. You almost curse to yourself outloud when flashes of the night before comes forward in your mind, biting down on your lip as you try to focus on doodling on the margins of your notebook. A crinkling sounds from behind you, and you turn to see Hyungwon, teeth half sunk into a red velvet cookie, realizing that you were looking at him. There is a pause in the air, silence filling the air between the two of you for a few milliseconds. The two of you simply stare at each other,  something very out of the ordinary, before he glares at you.

You roll your eyes.

Maybe your thoughts last night were just a one time thing.

But they weren’t.

As the nights go by, and as text conversations come and go, you find yourself thinking about Hyungwon more and more, an activity that you would usually always push out of your mind every time he comes close to nearing your thoughts, but your attempts are futile. It’s even more easier for you to think of the tall boy because this unknown man was faceless, and every single text lined with lust only pushes you to moan out Hyungwon’s name.

There was this one time you managed to get the unknown man to describe the item of clothing he’d use to tie you to the bed, which was an expensive silk black button up with white pinstripes, and you went crazy at the thought. Then, just a few days later, when conversing with your desk mate during class, Hyungwon walked in with the exact replica of the shirt, and then suddenly it was more than hot; it was unbearably arousing, and you had to act like everything was fine, tearing your eyes away from Hyungwon and squeezing your legs together.

And then the unknown man decides that sending you paragraphs upon paragraphs about what he wants to do to you during class is a good idea. And now you’ll never be able look at Hyungwon wearing neckties or belts the same anymore. And now you can’t even say Hyungwon’s name in annoyance, nor look at him at all, not when he’s wearing that heavenly smelling cologne that he always sprays on himself every single day, making it even harder for you to not just shove all of the papers and books off of his desk and start riding him right there.

Then there’s the fact that Kihyun has begun to realize how much time you spend on your phone, asking you about who you’re texting all the time, asking if it’s someone he knows, to which you always reply with a quick no. It worked at first, but the more you say it, the more curiosity glints in Kihyun’s eyes, gleaming of mischievousness and knowledge that he actually does know what you’re up to on your phone. He’d continue to pester you to get more information out, but you’d just roll your eyes and push him away.

It’s nothing serious.

It’s not.

It is a half a year later and you had just come home from a third date with one of Kihyun’s friends from work - Shownu, his name was. He was a kind man; soft-spoken, intelligent, awkwardly endearing, and a gentleman. He took you out to an expensive restaurant, one with the most incredible view of all the city, and handed you a large bouquet of your favorite flowers. The dinner went smoothly, splendidly, even, and after a few exchanged jokes and laughs, he drove you home. He offered to walk you up to the front doors of your apartment building, which you accepted, and before you could push open your door, he leans in for a kiss, and as did you.

But you felt nothing.

No spark, no ignition of excitement, no eruption of butterflies, and no urge for you to ask him to come inside with you. Zero. Zilch. Nada. You had pulled back, giving him an awkward, but soft smile, but he had seemed to understand the underlying message, and he just smiles at you back, telling you that it’s alright and that he wishes you a good night before walking back to his car. You watched him drive away before pushing into the lobby, hitting the up button on the elevator, your spirits low as you wait for the doors to open.

As they did, you stumble into the elevator, cursing at yourself for thinking so stupidly. You had just rejected a handsome, kind gentleman, who was obviously interested in you, who probably wanted to fuck with strings attached, and who would have given you the entire world if you had just asked for it. Yet here you are, leaning against the wall of the elevator, watching the floor numbers go past one by one, not one ounce of regret. You wonder what the fuck is wrong with yourself, since it’s nearly been two whole years since you’ve gotten laid. Of course, only if you aren’t counting texting Hyungwon.

Your thoughts are interrupted when your phone beeps in your purse, and, almost agonizingly, it seemed as if all the excitement that you had been anticipating with your date prior suddenly comes out of its hiding place.

From - Unknown Number: i was helping my friend out w their crim assignment. thought of u the entire time.

Your stomach sinks. He thought of you. How disgustingly domestic. He doesn’t even know who you are, nor do you know who he is, yet he thought of you, and you hated it. Doesn’t he know how much those words mean to you?

He thought of you, the young woman who acts as if you’re tough shit but is too much of a coward to reveal your true identity and ruin the bond they’ve created. He thought of you, the girl who always makes it your job to leave a space between you and other people in your life, until this unknown man came around. He thought of you, making space in his life to talk to you, shifted things to give you a permanent space, and now you’re embedded so deeply into his system that it’s almost like it’s his job to see something and be reminded of you.

He thought of you, not because he needed to, but because he wanted to.

You finds yourself leaning against the door of your bedroom, locking yourself inside before lifting your phone up to type a reply.

You sent: what- but you freeze momentarily, thumbs lifting from the keyboard. How in the world are you going to finish this sentence?

What are you thinking? You’re starting a deep relationship with someone you’ve never even met! You don’t even know my name! I don’t even know your name!

What am I feeling? Why do I get excited whenever my phone buzzes? Why are you making me feel this way? I shouldn’t feel this way.

What are we doing? This isn’t right. I’m scared.

Your breathing is shallow and shaking, staring at the blinking line that seemed to mock you for your loss of words, and then your thumbs begin to move, falling on the reflex answer.

You sent: what are you wearing?

There is a pause in the air before the three dots show up again.

From - Unknown Number: black tee, black skinny jeans, black boxers.

You sent: thats hot

From - Unknown Number: you find everything hot

You sent: that’s bc everything u tell me is hot

Of course, your first thought is of Hyungwon, sitting on his bed, head to toe in black, forking his long fingers through his blonde hair. You gulp and your thighs squeeze together.

From - Unknown Number: what are u wearing?

You sent: a short red dress and black pumps, red lipstick, my hair is up.

From - Unknown Number: shit

From - Unknown Number: are you wet?

You sent: sooo fucking wet

From - Unknown Number: touch urself for me

You suck in a breath, staring at your screen. The two of you have been doing this for months now, yet, every time he orders you what to do, you’re surprised yet humiliated at how eager you are to listen to him. Obediently, you part your legs open, sliding your hands along the skin on inside of your thighs until you reach your clothed pussy. Letting out a sigh at how wet the cloth is, you circle your clothed clit with the tip of your finger.

You sent: im doing it through my panties

From - Unknown Number: push them to the side darling and once you do, push a finger inside yourself.

Fuck, you love it when he calls you that. Your face flushes as this unknown man takes control, and you loves it when he does; god it makes you go crazy. So you do as he says, pushing a finger inside of you, pumping it in and out, bringing a hand up to your mouth to stop yourself from whimpering too loud, knowing Kihyun’s just on the other side of your bedroom wall, sleeping.

From - Unknown Number: are you doing it?

You sent: yes

From - Unknown Number: good girl. now add another finger for me and fuck urself slowly. can u do that for me?

You sent: yes

From - Unknown Number: now, palm your breasts. tug at your nipples slowly, and i want you to keep finger fucking yourself while you do. keep your fingers sliding in and out of you, ok?

You sent: ok

You are obedient, your breath hitching in your throat as you open your legs wider, pumping your own fingers in and out of your body. You imagine him right beside you, imagining his low voice whispering the words at you, hot breath fanning your body, smooth and commanding, and you begin to feel a knot forming at the bottom of your stomach.

From - Unknown Number: move your fingers faster for me, curl them inside of you and rub the way just you like. i bet ur clit is throbbing and aching, isn’t it? it feels good to press on it while you fuck yourself hm? you’re such a good girl, you do thingsi tell you to do becuase you like it whn i tell u to fuck yourself.

You attempt to mute your whimpers by biting the inside of your cheeks, but your endeavours fall futile as you gently whine Hyungwon’s name far too loudly. Your trembling legs are apart, feet on both sides of your body as lewd sounds of your fingers fill the room. You’re almost sure Kihyun can hear you now, but you don’t care.

From - Unknown Number: ur not answeing me anymore. ur too busy fucking urself hm? ur too busy imagining that its me fucking u. that it’s MY fingers inside of you, pumping in and out of your body, that its my teeth tugging at ur nipples. how close are you to coming for me now? i bet it won’t even take you long to respond, fuck, i can just imagine u now. your hands between ur tremblign legs, biting down on ur tongue so u dont scream. but i dont want that. i want u to scream my name.

Your back arches off the wood of your bedroom door, and you know you’re close.

From - Unknown Number: scream my name when u cum. cum baby. cum for me.

And you do as he says, shaking as a choked back moan escapes from your mouth, barely managing to keep it silent. When you come down from your high, you rest your back against your door once more, trembling legs dropping to the floor. You barely attempts cleans yourself before lifting your phone to reply, fingers quivering against the cold screen.

You sent: fuck that was so hot

From - Unknown Number: did you cum?

You sent: cum is an understatement.

From - Unknown Number: good girl.

You sent: its your turn…

From - Unknown Number: oh no its all good. i already came haha

You sent: aw rly.. without my help?

From - Unknown Number: i imagined everything you were doing to yourself and it was hot… so, i guess u did help me in a way.

You freeze.

You sent: wait. you know what i look like?

From - Unknown Number: no but …. i have this … fantasy of what you look like.

You sent: and what does it look like?

From - Unknown Number: (y/hair/colour), (y/skin/colour), (y/height)....

From - Unknown Number: guiltily i think about this girl i detest. i’ve told u about her before. how funny would it be if you were her?

Your heart sinks into your stomach. This is the first time the two of you had ever talked about appearance, and this unknown man hit everything about you spot on. Dread pools around your heart in your stomach as you type out a reply.

You sent: haha who knows

You sent: im sorry i have to go now

You sent: ill text u tmr. good bye

Your phone buzzes one last time but you don’t look at his message, throwing it into your backpack as you finally get up to clean yourself, walking into your bathroom and changing out of your dress, assuring yourself that you aren’t running away but knowing full well that that’s the only thing you’re doing.

 ----

  You don’t text him tomorrow, you don’t text him the next day, the day after that, the next week, or the next month.

You haven’t texted him in five months, but all he did in those five months was think of you, your phone vibrating constantly due to messages from him. Dozens of them. They came in groups at first, but as the months go by, they come through sparser and sparser. At first, he hadn’t realized that you had stopped texting him, but when the first month passed, he grew worried, then they spiralled to apologetic, accusatory, and then he began to blame himself, and once again, spiralled back to apologetic.

From - Unknown Number: good morning!!!

From - Unknown Number: good mornin!

From - Unknown Number: u havent responded to my texts lately.. i hope everythings ok

From - Unknown Number: hello?

From - Unknown Number: if this is about the appearance thing i genuinely apologize. i dont wanna make things uncomfortable for u.

From - Unknown Number: u dont owe me anything

From - Unknown Number: can you please just respond to me one last time. im worried… i just need to know if you’re okay.

From - Unknown Number: my friend jus finished their crim course today. i thought of u.

From - Unknown Number: its been four months and a half… i graduate in a few weeks. i dont know why im sending this to u… i just thought i should tell u...

From - Unknown Number: i miss you.

From - Unknown Number: i wish i never met you. i guess it’s a good thing i never actually did.

It’s for the best, you would tell yourself, before swiping left to get rid of the messages he’s sent you. Still, you can’t ignore the dull pain each message sent to you cuts your skin and strikes you to the bone, even now, during the graduation afterparty, through the valour and cheers of the graduates knowing you’re about to turn a new page in your life, you cannot seem to let go of the words ingrained in your mind.

“Hey,” you feel somebody nudge your arm. “Is everything ok?”

Turning your head, you see Minhyuk, looking at you in worry. You give him a small smile, shoving your phone into the pocket of your short dress before folding your hands in your lap.

“Yeah, I’m okay,” you reassure him. “I’m just kinda nervous. We graduated, after all.”

“Yeah, yeah, I understand completely.” Minhyuk pouts, nodding his head, but something hidden behind his pupils seem to tell as if he didn’t quite believe you. There is a beat before he begins to talk again. “Oh yeah, I completely forgot to ask you,” Minhyuk starts. “This happened like, a year ago, but it’s always been in the back of my mind.”

You quirk an eyebrow. “Yeah? What is it?”

“There was a random number that texted me, Wonho, Jooheon, and Hyungwon around a year back. They said something about being in the same class with me…” he starts, and your eyes begin to widen, but you force yourself into keeping a calm expression. “I’ve asked almost everyone in all my classes if it was them but they all said no. The only one left was you.”

You look away from Minhyuk, almost cursing to your drunk self for giving him such an obvious clue, and then thinking, why not? It is the end of your college career. After this party ends, you’ll most likely never see any of these people anymore, for the rest of your life. Plus, you were almost absolutely sure he wasn’t the unknown man you were texting the past year, right?

You bite the inside of your cheek before replying.

“Yes, it was me.” you confess to him, feeling as if a big weight had just been lifted off your shoulders. “I was drunk, and I don’t know what I was saying. I’m really sorry, Minhyuk. I apologize for any trouble I caused…”

Minhyuk’s eyebrows lift, his jaw slacking a bit. “Really?” he questions you, before grinning. “Oh my gosh, don’t be sorry! That’s so funny. I mean, I would have never thought it’d be you, at all!”

“Really?” you ask him. “What did I send you?”

“You told me that I annoyed you during class,” he pouts, before throwing an arm around you. “But that’s ok! You still put up with me anyways so that’s all that matters.”

You heave out a sigh of relief before letting out a giggle, throwing your own arm around him as the two of you playfully sway to the edm music coursing through the house, for the first time in the past year, almost feeling free.

But it was as if the universe timed it as a way to mock you, because when you opened your eyes to look at the lounge floor, the graduates dancing against each other in strained duress, almost laughably dividing into two for the tall man standing in between, your eyes meet Hyungwon’s.

“Hyungwon!” Minhyuk calls his friend, whose eyes flash from you to Minhyuk. “Come over here!”

You feel your stomach drop at the sight of him and at the sound of his name, seeing him walk over towards the two of you, holding a drink in his hand. He looks absolutely beautiful; his hair flutters over his face in loose waves, and although his roots are beginning to grow in, you can’t help but become slack jaw at how good he manages to pull the look off. His eyes are still trained on you, not one ounce of drunken stupor in his irises. He’s dressed in just a plain white dress shirt and a loosened tie, ditching the black blazer he had sported that morning during the graduation ceremony. As you look him up and down, you begin to remember the messages that the unknown man had sent you, and memories of your fantasies of Hyungwon cloud your mind.

Quickly, you look away.

“(Y/N).” his voice is low. “Congratulations.”

You are hesitant to look up at him but you do so anyways, meeting eyes with him again, his pupils laced with intent, but you cower from him for the first time in the years that you’ve known him, heat rushing to your cheeks.

“Hyungwon,” you say, the taste of his name rolling off your tongue begrudgingly identifiable. “Thank you. Congratulations to you too.”

Silence seduces the air between the both of you, unbeknownst to Minhyuk, who still continued to sway back and forth to the future bass music pumping through the speakers. Your eyes are now trained on your hands folded in your lap, and you could feel Hyungwon’s gaze burning into your skin.

“I’m gonna go get a drink.” you excuse yourself, standing up from the couch. “Congratulations again, you guys. I’ll see you around.”

You keep your head ducked as you make a beeline for the liquor table, ignoring the feeling of Hyungwon’s eyes on you. Hastily, you grab a can of beer, hissing at the sudden contact of coldness of the metal can, before you begin to chug it down. You don’t know why you’re so nervous around Hyungwon all of a sudden, as he doesn’t know you’ve been whining his name nor does he know of your fantasies, yet, ever since you had stopped replying to the unknown man, Hyungwon’s presence in your life grew more intense, even as you attempted to avoid him at all costs.

You are on your second beer now and you think about looking for Kihyun for him to watch your intake. You had lost him on your way into the party to the lounge floor which housed almost all of the recent graduates grinding next to each other, you don’t want to know what Kihyun is up to in that sweaty crowd, nor do you want to spoil his fun, so instead, you settle to sit in another seat, opposite side and far from where Hyungwon is.

You aren’t sure if it’s because of the alcohol, but you’re almost sure you can still feel his eyes still trained on you.

“(Y/N),” you hear Kihyun call, and you almost let out a sigh of relief at the appearance of your best friend, sliding into the empty spot next to you. “Come dance with me on the dance floor!”

“I’m good,” you smile at him. “I’m fine just sitting here. My feet hurt from wearing heels all day.”

“Are you sure?” he quirked an eyebrow, and you nod your head. He frowns.

“I know when something is bothering you because you act different,” he says, sighing. “And frankly, you’ve been acting different for the past few months. What is it?”

“Huh?” You look at him, panic setting in. “No, no! I’m not upset or bothered by anything at all. Don’t worry about me, Kihyun, go enjoy yourself.”

“I can’t enjoy myself when I know my best friend is wallowing around,” he pushes you playfully. “Come on. Is it Hyungwon?”

You freeze.

“Hyungwon?” your voice is quiet. “Why would it be Hyungwon?”

“(Y/N), me and him are pretty close, and I’ve known you since, like, grade school,” he tells you. “I know when you’re hiding a secret, and I know when you’re lying. It’s fairly obvious that the two of you were a thing, plus… you weren’t really discreet some nights.” He snickers and you punch his arm.

“Kihyun,” you look at him. “Me and Hyungwon were never a thing. We literally hate each other.”

“He looks at you as if you stole all the stars in the night sky for him and you practically look at him like a love-drunk puppy,” he tells you. “People that hate each other don’t look at each other that way,”

“Kihyun, I’m being serious,” you tell him, grabbing his hands and looking him intently in the eyes. “I’m not with Hyungwon. I’ve never been with Hyungwon. And never, in my life, have I ever wanted to be with Hy-”

Your buzzing phone indicating a call cuts your sentence off, and you thank the heavens for a way out of this conversation. You excuse yourself from Kihyun, who only nods and takes a sip from his red cup as you walk to a much more secluded area, away from the bounding music. You don’t read the caller id, swiping right to accept it.

“Hello?” you breath into your phone.

It’s absolute silence for a few seconds, and you think that it may have been a misdial and that they had hung up, turning around to return to the party, but you bump into something warm and tall. Looking up, your heart drops into your stomach.

Hyungwon stands in front of you, his own phone pressed against his ear.

The horribly familiar words roll off his tongue so easily.

“What are you wearing?”

Dropping your phone, you do the only thing you know how to do.

You run.

You run quickly, the sound of your heartbeat in your ears drowning out the sounds of the party, drowning out Hyungwon’s voice as he calls after you. It’s ironic, how many times you manage to find yourself running away from anything that has to deal with him, but you want nothing else than to never show your face in front of Hyungwon ever again. How could you, when the months you’ve texted that unknown man, the months you’ve texted Hyungwon himself, were filled with revelations of secrets and desires, something you haven’t ever told your own best friend.

The night is cold when you open the door, and you shiver momentarily before warmth surrounds you. You feel the worsted wool cloak around you, smelling Hyungwon’s rich cologne as he walks past you, searching for his keys deep in his pockets. You hear his car beep, signalling that it’s been unlocked, and a dread pools your stomach.

“Get in the car.” his voice is calm, but it sets humiliation aflame in the back of your throat.

“No.” you say, ridding of his blazer and letting it fall on the concrete ground.

Hyungwon pivots on his heel, looking at you with eyes filled with emotions you cannot decipher. He walks closer to you, grabbing his crumpled blazer, before standing up straight and towering before you.

“Get in the car.” he repeats, his calm demeanour less relaxed, voice strained against grit teeth. You listen this time, getting into his car and sitting on the passenger’s seat before he slams the door closed, heading over to the driver’s seat and doing the same. The time it took for him to turn on the engine and speed off into the empty streets is silent, you only wish for the rest of the car ride to be the same, but of course, it wasn’t.

“Why did you do it?” he asks you after a few minutes, his voice hush against the smooth purr of the engine, focused on the road in front of him. His grip on the steering wheel was tight. You gulp. “Did you think it was funny?”

“No.”

“No?” he turns his head towards you momentarily before snapping his attention back on the road. “After a year of making me go crazy, after a year of making me feel something and then tearing me apart, no is all you have to say?”

“N-No.” you answer again. You can see his fingers tense against the steering wheel.

“Evidently, you have a vocabulary,” his tone is venomous. “So use it.”

“Please stop.” your face is red with embarrassment, recalling some of the messages you have sent him, remembering the feeling that washed over you when you whined his name to an empty room accompanied with lewd noises. “Stop.”

“Stop what?” he asks you, voice still dangerously calm. “Stop talking? So I can pull something like what you did and cut all contact we have with each other? Is that what you want? Because I fucking know that that wasn’t what you fucking wanted. Because, hell, you begged me to keep going, you begged me to keep talking, you begged me to stay. Bullshit. You didn’t even stay with me, you didn’t even tell me if you were okay.”

You bite down on your lip, eyeing your fists in your lap. Your heartbeat is beating out of your chest at this point, but you can’t tell of what.

“I know you thought of me, (Y/N),” he says, after a few seconds. “You began to avoid me, and as I did you. I thought I was doing a carnal sin, I was supposed to hate you. I’m supposed to hate you. So why did I keep thinking of you?”

It takes all for Hyungwon to not scream then and there, the frustration finally getting to him, stepping on the breaks as his car screeches to a halting stop on the side of the road, next to a mass of trees. He pushes open his side of the car and gets out, running his hands through his hair, almost stressed, before kicking the tire of his car in frustration. You watch him go through a great deal of emotions before you decide to step out of the car yourself.

“I just wanna hear one thing,” he tells you, turning around, eyes pleading. “One thing. One single thing. An apology. A confession. A proper goodbye. It doesn’t matter. Just one thing, one more thing from you, please, (Y/N).”

“Why do you care?” you ask him, voice hush. “You aren’t supposed to care.”

He pivots on his heel, grabbing the top of his car as he looks at you, boring his eyes into yours, as if he were searching for something in your pupils. He bites his lip before opening his mouth.

“Is it not obvious, enough, (Y/N)?” he whispers.

“What?” you stammer.

“I care, fuck, I’ve always pushed it to the back of my mind but what happened between us just made it all the clearer for me that I do care for you,” he pauses. “I care for you because I’m in love with you.”

Your eyes widen at that confession, freezing in time.

“You can’t just say that to me like it’s nothing.” you whisper, and that’s when the tears begin to tease your waterline.

“I’m not saying it like it’s nothing.” Hyungwon’s voice grows louder. “I love you. I’m in love with you. Fuck, (Y/N), I’m in love with you, and I’ve acted like an idiot all these years trying to get your attention. I’m not saying this like it’s nothing. I’m in love w-”

He doesn’t finish his sentence due to your lips pressed against his, and if it were anything like the movies, you were almost sure you saw electric sparks flying between the both of you. He kisses you, his arm snaked around the small of your back and his other hand pressed against the back of your head, and you kiss him back, arms wrapped around his neck as you pull him closer. Your tongue finds its way into his mouth, hungry for him, pressing his body against yours, the same way the both of you had been imagining for a year.

He backs you up towards the hood of the car and slams you down, lips disconnecting from yours before re-attaching them to your neck, littering your skin with memoirs of him in the form of purple lesions.

“My name,” he whispers in between kisses. “Say my name.”

“H-Hyungwon,” you moan, used to his name slipping from between your lips, but the unfamiliarity of his body against yours causing you more excitement. He sucks on a certain spot on your neck, before licking it to soothe the soft pain. “Hyungwon, please.”

“What is it?” he coaxes you with his words just as much as he is with his lips, hand snaking up your body as he begins to knead your breasts through your red dress. Moans and whimpers fall from your lips at his simple touch, and he smirks to himself. “Tell me what you want, darling.”

“I want you,” you tell him, bucking your hips when you feel his hand sliding up your thighs. “I want you, Hyungwon, please.”

“Out here?” he challenges you. “On the hood of my car? If someone were to drive by, they’d see us.”

“I don’t fucking care,” the ache between your thighs and Hyungwon’s touch is the only thing on your mind. “Please just fuck me. Please.”

Hyungwon chuckles, letting his hand cup you through your panties, the wet material causing a strain to build up in Hyungwon’s crotch. He curses under his breath, lips coming back into contact with yours, swallowing your moans as his tongue dances with yours.

“You’re such a good girl, asking so nicely,” he whispers after pulling away, moving your panties to the side, fingers finding your clit, brushing past it as you curse out loud. It was humiliating how wet you’ve become just from his simple touch and his words, an arrogant smirk making its way onto his face. “So wet for me already, and I haven’t even been inside you yet.”

His fingers find their way back to your clit, softly running over your bundle of nerves, too soft for your liking as you whine, bucking your hips. He pulls his fingers away from your pussy, pushing your hips back onto the cold metal of the hood of his car.

His voice is low. “Be quiet or else I won’t fuck you at all.”

You retract your impatience at his words, biting down on your lips as he circles your clit with his middle finger, adding a bit more pressure this time. His eyes are on you, watching your face intently as you try to force back a moan. His free hand finds its way to your face, tracing your bottom lip with your thumb, before pulling his other hand away from your pussy. Gently, he tugs at your chin, signalling for you to open your mouth.

“Wet your fingers for me, darling.”

You oblige, opening your lips, letting his long fingers roam your mouth. Hyungwon watches as you suck on his fingers, tongue dancing across the two digits, eyes boring into his. The strain in his pants becomes tighter, but he wants to focus on you, instead imagining that it was his cock your tongue dances around. He pulls his hand away from your mouth, bringing you closer for a kiss. You groan into it as your spread your legs wider, wordlessly begging him to do something, to which he does, slipping his wet fingers inside of you.

The sensation shocked you at first, his long fingers filling you out well, but as they begin to move inside you all you can do is let out a moan against his lips, the sinful sound is music to his ears. His fingers are slick inside of you, moving in and out of you painfully slow at first, but as your kiss begins to become a little more sloppy, he quickens the pace of his fingers.

“You like that, hm? You like my fingers fucking you like this?” he mumbles against your lips, grinning as he hears you moan loudly. “Shit, look at you. You’re such a mess already, what will you become once my cock is inside you?”

You aren’t even able form words, the pleasure overtaking you and his words the only thing echoing in your ears. It was as if your hand sprung to life on its own, making its way towards his crotch, palming him through the fabric of his jeans. You felt his bulge, how hard he was for you, and knowing you were so close to it yet so far due to the layers of clothing, it drove you crazy.

“I want it, Hyungwon.” you whine, adding pressure to your hand as you pet him. He suppresses a moan, and obliging to your words, he undoes his jeans, pulling his cock free from underneath his boxers. You grab hold of him, already so stiff in your hands as you begin to jerk him off slowly, pumping your hand back and forth around his cock as he continues to fuck you with his fingers. He buries his head into your neck as he begins to buck his hips against your hand, moaning into your neck as he does.

“Fuck, this is s-so hot.” you whisper in his ear, beginning to feel the knot forming in your abdomen as his fingers pick up the pace. It is when the tips of his fingers brush against the certain spot inside of you when you let out a gasp, your hips bucking into his hand, feeling him smile into your neck. “S-Shit, I’m gonna cum.” A chain of curses fall out of your mouth, words you aren’t able to comprehend rolling off your tongue much as you come undone with just his fingers. You whine, legs trembling as he kisses your neck, chuckling lightly before pressing his lips to yours.

“It’s your turn,” you mumble against his lips, his cock still stiff in your hand. Precum had already began to leak out of his tip, coating him and your hand in a sheen of liquid. You pull away, looking into his eyes through your eyelashes. “I want to taste you.”

Wordlessly, he pulls you off the hood of his car and towards the passenger’s side, standing behind his car for protection in case anyone were to drive by and see. He lets his pants and boxers pool at his feet, before kissing you once more, hands busy grabbing your ass.

“Get on your knees,” he tells you, and you’re obedient, listening to him as you press your knees down into the concrete, hissing at the pain of your knees but thirsting for him to be in your mouth. You lick your lips as you look up at him, waiting for his neck order, and he nudges the corner of your mouth the the tip of his cock. “Open your mouth for me, darling.”

He enters your mouth, letting out a gruff moan as he does, the feeling of your tongue on his cock driving him crazy. He’s waited for this moment for so long, seeing you on your knees in front of him, listening to every word he says is so vastly different from the image he’s used to seeing from you - annoyed at him, nagging at him, telling him off. That thought alone is enough to send him over the edge, but he wants to savour this; he wants to savour you. You start off with a few kitten licks, feeling his cock twitch and rest against your face, smiling as you watch his, normally indifferent facial expression, turn into something sinful.

“You look so beautiful like this,” his voice is hushed, breathy. “With your lips around me.”

He cranes his neck back at the feeling of your mouth around his cock, bobbing your head up and down his shaft. He’s holding onto the roof of the car, using his other hand to comb your hair out of your face to get a better look at you, a mix of adoration and lust in his irises. You grab onto his thighs for balance, your knees already beginning to give out, and just as you do, you hear tires and the hum of an engine just a few meters away.

You widen your eyes, realizing that someone is about to drive past, pulling away from his cock.

“Did I say you could stop?” asks Hyungwon, reaching down and grabbing your chin, looking into your eyes.

“Hyungwon, what if they s-”

“Did I say you could stop?” he asks again, and you bite your bottom lip, a course of excitement running through you, feeling yourself throb at the thought of getting caught, and with that, you take him back into his mouth, licking strips from his base to his head before wrapping your lips around him, taking him to the back of your mouth, ignoring the hum of the engine and headlights passing you by. They had no doubt seen Hyungwon, he towers over his car with his height, but you didn’t care.

“Shit, shit, stop,” Hyungwon grunts as your swirl your tongue around his head, pulling you up, much to your confusion. “I wanna cum while I fuck you.”

And with that, he presses you against the side of the hood of his car, pushing the hem of your dress up to your waist. He bites down on his bottom lip as he teases your slit with the head of his cock, hearing you mewl his name and different variations of begging, wasting no time to find a good pace before slamming into you. The contact causes you mewl to break into a pleasured scream, his cock pumping in and out of you, stretching you out and making you grab onto Hyungwon’s white button up shirt, wrinkling the fabric, loud gasps and pleading escaping your mouth.

“Hyungwon!” his name escapes from behind your lips like honey as he slams into you again and again, lewd sounds of skin slapping against skin, grunts and gasping filling the air.

This isn’t anything Hyungwon has ever done before, fucking on the hood of his car like something less of a human, but he doesn’t give a damn. If someone were to drive by and witness the two of you fucking like animals, he wouldn’t give a shit; his thoughts are clouded with pleasure and all that he hears and sees at that moment is you. Your voice, your parted lips, the feeling your fingernails sink into the fabric of his shirt on his forearms, your walls spasming around him. He’s too needy and too desperate for you to care about anything else.

He brushes past your certain spot again, causing you to scream his name once more, widening your legs as he hits it again and again.

“I’m gonna c-cum. H-Hyungwon, I’m g-gonna cum, fuck, please.” you stammer out in broken sobs, the familiar knot appearing in your abdomen once again. You’re almost certain that you’re beginning to see stars lining your vision, words unfamiliar to one-another slipping out of your mouth in strings of pleasure.

“If you cum, I’ll never fuck you again.”

His tone causes you to whimper, trying to keep your high to yourself as best as you can, your breath already beginning to falter. You can’t stop your walls from spasming around him, clenching the muscles in your thighs to try and help yourself from going against Hyungwon’s word, but your attempts fall flat as his cock sliding in and out of you at that speed and at that strength only causes your desire to grow bigger and bigger.

“H-Hyungwon, please, I can’t hold it,” you mewl, letting out short gasps of breath as he continues to rut against you. Your cheeks are red with both embarrassment and agony, your knees already beginning to buckle. He leans over, kissing your neck as his hips move into yours rhy “P-Please, please, please, I want to cum. Please let me cum.”

“I said hold it.” Hyungwon’s breath is warm against the skin of your neck, his hands pulling down the front of your dress, exposing your chest. He moves his face, enveloping your nipple into his mouth, plump lips sucking onto you as his hand kneads your other breast. The feeling of his tongue circling around your nub drove you crazy, his eyes boring into yours. You can’t stand to keep your orgasm under wraps, your entire body trembles now.

“H-Hyungwon, p-please!” you cry out, your hands flying towards his hair, pulling onto his blonde strands as you feel tears tease your waterline. Your grip on his hair tightens with each thrust he pushes into you, as if he were leaving remnants of himself inside of you, a growing smirk teasing his lips as he watches your failing attempts to hold yourself back. You arch your back from the hood of the car, letting out gasps of shock every time you feel the knot in your stomach slowly untying, clenching all the muscles you know of to try and stop yourself.

“Such a good girl,” Hyungwon’s whispers, his eyebrows beginning to furrow together and his eyes glazing over, signalling that he is close to his orgasm as well. “You’re so good… Fuck! I’m almost there, fuck.”

Hyungwon bites down on his bottom lip, leaning back again as he grabs your hips, fucking into your even harder than he was before. At this point, you’ve lost all awareness of your surroundings, you couldn’t care less if someone were to drive by and see the two of you fucking on top of Hyungwon’s car, all you cared about was your release, one that you kept pushing back so many times you’re almost sure it’ll take a toll on your body once you let go. His hand snakes from your breast and back to your pussy, his thumb adding pressure onto your clit, a sensation that makes your eyes roll to the back of your head as your jaw turns slack, letting out a moan of pleasure.

“I-I can’t take it anymore, Hyungwon,” you whimper, trying to push away his hand when you know all you want is to bring it closer. “Hyungwon. I can’t hold it, I-I’m gonna cum.”

“Then cum,” he whispers, looking down at you through his hooded eyelids. “Cum for me, darling.”

And you waste no time obliging to his word, the feeling of pleasure ripping through your body as you screw your eyes shut, stars behind your eyelids as you moan, Hyungwon’s name mixed with different curses and other lewd sounds. He still continued to fuck you through your orgasm, already sensitive from the amount of pressure that you’ve received throughout the night, and it causes your entire body to tremble and convulse.

“Fuck, fuck, (Y/N), I’m cumming,” Hyungwon grunts, before pulling out of you. He holds onto the side of his car as he pumps himself onto you, staining your pretty red dress and your trembling thighs, your name laced around sinful words and immoral moans rolling off his tongue.

You watch him as you come down from your orgasm, the juxtaposition in the setting almost laughable as you take in his beauty; his blonde hair stuck to his face with sweat, framing his features so nicely; his already plump lips even plumper now from all the body praise, kissing and licking every surface of you he encountered, his top teeth sinking into his bottom lip. You sit up from the hood of his car, a grin on your face before you grab him by the front of his shirt and pull him in for another kiss, he still grunts from sensitivity but still pushes his lips against yours, soft as you snake your hands around his neck.

And the night continued on like that, limbs entangled in one another in the backseat of his car now; the two of you are almost thankful that no one ever really drives on this road. He kissed you everywhere and as did you, making sure you savoured every part of him for all the years that you’ve missed, connecting your body with his - the only thing that divided the both of you was the thin layer of sweat on your bodies that accumulated as the night went on. You’ve lost count of the amount of orgasms he had given you that night, but it didn’t matter; the two of you have waited for this for far too long.

Dawn nearly breaks the night sky when quiet finally takes place in his car, the windows fogged up and chests slowly rising and falling now instead of rapidly panting. You lay your head on top of his chest, listening to his heartbeat. You think back on when he was simply just an unknown number to you, the feelings that you had formed for the unknown man and Hyungwon, and you suppress a giggle when you realize how many times the answer was right in front of your eyes.

“What’s so funny?” he asks amusedly, hands busy entangled in your hair, twirling strands around his fingers. He smelt of rich vanilla, a smell that you could not stand, once upon a time, but found yourself drowning in rapture now.

“Nothing,” you say, nuzzling your face into his naked chest. Your clothes had been discarded long ago, littering the floor of Hyungwon’s car. “I’m just thinking of all the times I could’ve figured out you were the unknown number. The answers were right in front of me the entire time.”

You think back on it; the first time he had texted you kindly, asking what he should buy for breakfast, and heeding to your word of buying a bagel, and how you ended up glaring at Hyungwon across your classroom that day for being so obnoxious with his bagel, the one you had advised him to buy in the first place. The day after the two of you started sexting, how he announced that he was going to buy a red velvet cookie, and thus, glaring at him again for being obnoxious with it. His friend from criminology had to be your mutual friend, Minhyuk, as well. It was almost embarrassing how many clues you had missed.

“We were literally texting each other even when we were a few feet away,” he laughs, petting your hair down. “We’re both dumb. We’re perfect for each other.”

You pout at him playfully. “Hey, I’m not dumb!” you tell him, to which he smiles at you with eyes that could compete against crescent moons. “You’re mean, I like you better through text.”

He chuckles. “So you wanna go back to just texting huh?” Hyungwon questions you, quirking an eyebrow. “Then I won’t be able to do this.” He leans down and presses his lips against yours for a few seconds, feeling your body ultimately melting into the kiss. He pulls away, grinning from ear to ear as you lay there, heat rising in your cheeks.

“Actually, never mind. I like you a lot better in person.” you say, after a few seconds of silence, to which he lets out a soft chuckle. He stares at you for a moment, eyes softening at your sight as a easeful smile graces his lips. Leaning down, he kisses your forehead.

“I like you a lot better in person too.”

Kihyun was right, Hyungwon really does look at you as if you stole all the stars in the night sky for him.

FIN.

[dayasbun]

Fame - Angus Cloud (4)

Summary- a luckily timed audition leads to you falling for your new and unexpected co-star.

Warnings- okay HI welcome to my first multi chapter series woah?! this is actually so exciting for me like wow especially since angus doesn’t have any fics yet im just really really excited- so warnings! smut for sure, bad words, lotsa fluff, angst- everything in one basically. here comes a ride and I hope you enjoy :)

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4 {reading now}

-

“Fuck right there- Oh my god please-” You moaned holding his hair. “You never had anyone eat your pussy like this before right?” he said eating deeper as you moaned and squirmed. “Only you baby, this pussy is only you-”

“Yo wake the fuck up, you making weird noises and shit.”

You sat up taking in a deep breath and inspected your surroundings. There stood a worried Angus with a mug in his hand. “I'm fine...” you said quite unconvincingly.

“You sure? I went to make you some tea and came back to you rolling around and groaning and shit, thought that strange netflix monster had come to you or sum.”

“The demogorgan-”

“Yeah that shit!” He sat next to you on the edge of the bed. “Nightmare?” he asked softly as he handed you the tea.

“Well not exactly...” You took the warm mug and took in a long swig of the warm goodness. It's not like you were just going to openly tell him ‘Oh no, I just had a dream about you eating me out and I loved every second of it.’ “Actually yeah, a nightmare.” you lied.

“I hate those, what was yours about?”

“I...a monster ate me alive and I couldn't stop it.”

Angus shook his head. “Damn mamas, I’m sorry. Those suck, I know its like 2 pm, but let’s eat some breakfast and try to forget about it.”

You nodded standing up and stretching “Thanks...for the tea.”

“Of course, don’t girls love tea? Ion know, I don't really be sleeping with girls that often.” He chuckled walking into the small kitchen.

“Tea is amazing!” You exclaimed, following him and sitting on the counter. “I love tea in all seasons, it has so many benefits.”

“Yeah? What’s some of them benefits.”

“Well green tea has amazing antioxidants, and is a more naturally caffeinated drink than coffee- with not as many negative results. But don't get me wrong, I really do love my coffee- anyway! Tea can help straighten and strengthen bones, brighten your smile, and help you lose weight!!”

“Oh wow.” He laughed “I didn't even care about all that tea shit, just wanted to hear your voice. But it was actually kinda interesting.”

“Yeah- and don't worry about a lack of my voice, I never shut up.”

“You right about that; but before you get all defensive, its aight. I like hearing you blab off about random stuff ion care about.”

You felt your face grow hot as you stifled a giggle that wanted to come out. “Thank you. I think I talk too much, but hey, can't really stop it y’know?” Angus nodded as he cracked 5 eggs into a pan. “You just be going off about stuff- actually you was sleep talking a little bit.”

Fuck.

“Yeah? What was I saying?” you asked innocently, hoping he didn't say what he was most definitely about to say.

“Well it was when you had that nightmare. Was the monster a cow or sum? Cuz you kept saying ‘Angus’ so like.” He turned to look at you “I figure it wasn’t me, but it was probably like...some beef monster.”

“Oh yeah, for sure a beef monster.”

“And that beef monster was eating you huh?”

You smoothly tucked your hair behind your ear and nodded with a sweet smile “Mhm.”

Angus gave you a quick up and down look before turning around and continuing to scramble the eggs. You had to change the current topic or you'd die of embarrassment, so you decided to bring up the topic of the show instead. “Do you know which scenes we’re filming tomorrow?”

“Yeah, no sex scenes until next week. Tomorrow they finna do you coming back and me reminiscing on the old times.”

“Okay cool. I have those lines down, pretty simple...” You mumbled.

“Yeah me too.”

A butcher knife couldn't even cut the tension in the room right now. Fuck, a chainsaw couldn't either.

“So like... I’m gonna go change and I'll be right back? Sound good?”

“You can wear summa my stuff. If you want- you don’t got to i'm just offering.”

“Oh that'd be great thanks! You know my trailer is just so far away!” You joked, knowing that it was only next door. You hopped off of the counter and followed him back into the room you two had just come out of.

“You just want one big shirt? Girls be doing that alot nowadays.”

“Yeah, thanks that'd be great...”

“So the biggest shirt I got got some barbecue stains on it- ignore it. I just went off on some spicy wings the other day-”

You burst out laughing and sat on the bed “Gus it’s fine, gimme!” You pulled your shirt off and held out your hands. He turned back around to find you only in your bra and shorts.

“Yooooo-”

“Its fine, we have to be completely naked with each other next week. Titties are just titties.” You took the shirt out of his hands and put it on. After pulling off the shorts that you wore underneath the shirt; that was more like a dress- and folding them, you walked back into the kitchen and reclaimed your spot on the counter.

“Well I know one problem we won't have!” You stated with a smirk.

“Yeah, and what's that?”

“Drake was worried you wouldn't be able to ‘get it up’...but honestly, I don’t think it'll be too hard.”

“Why you think that?”

“Look down.”

Sure, Angus wouldn't let you live down the wet dream you had about him for quite a while, but you'd never let him live down the boner he got- just from seeing you in a bra.

+

“So. Let's get to the real real.” Storm said pulling her knees up to her chest with a grin. “What the hell is going on with you and Angus?”

You, Storm and Daya were hanging in your trailer. You three were the only girls that didn't have scenes to film right now, Alexia, Barbie and the rest of the female cast were shooting night scenes. They had helped you set up the place to seem more homey, and now the newly formed trio you were a part of was in your bed with microwave popcorn, juicy juice, and twizzlers.

“Nothing Storm! Actually nothing I-”

“Nope, don't do that.” Z quickly cut you off. “Everyone can see it, it’s like what everyone on set talks about.”

“What?-”

“Plus, he talks about you too much, and you do the same with him! Earlier I said I wanted to pop some microwave popcorn and you started telling me about some conspiracy he told you about popcorn and microwaves, how they’re a secret way in for the government- like girl! Don't tell me you're so whipped that you're out here believing this stuff!”

“OKAY! Okay! I get it...look Gus is-”

“Gus?! You call him Gus?”

“Yeah?-”

“He literally hates that nickname with a passion. He gotta love you.” Storm chuckled grabbing a handful of popcorn.

“Okay well Angus is cute. He’s sweet and funny and caring- BUT. I won’t let anything happen between us, it’s like...business. This field is acting- and I don't think it would be good for us to do anything more, especially during filming.”

Z sighed. “Falling for your costars is weird.”

“Yeah.” Storm chimed in. “Our girl Daya been there and done that...but it never really affected her acting. She's so talented that she could keep it hidden off screen and focus on her character. I mean I know you talented Y/N...but you not my big sis like Z, so I don't really know how you'd be able to deal with it yet. Drake already seemed a bit iffy about it because he could tell you two had a little something going, but the thing comforting him is y'all are talented. So he knows you can do it- I know you can too.”

“Yeah he sent us a letter about it...it's just hard. I can't lose this role, I've come so far.”

“I don't think you’ll lose it. I think you'll be fine. Just keep a business mindset when on set. What goes on off screen and behind closed doors is your business, girl. Drake or nobody can stop that- Jesus can't even stop that!”

You and Storm giggled at Zendaya’s last comment. “Yeah yeah yeah...okay I get it guys. I got this- period.”

“Period.”

“Period...So were you one of those girls that watched all the Fez scene compilations on Youtube and drooled?” Storm teased you.

“No!” You said firmly, knowing you were lying.

“Oh she definitely was.”

“I wasn't!”

“I just don't see it! Angus is just not attractive to me, he looks like one of those guys that stop you at the gas station with a ghetto ass group of friends- he rubs his hands together and then screams ‘Hey baby lemme get yo numbaaaa!!!!’“

In response, you practically fell over laughing “Stoppp no!”

The rest of the night was filled with giggles and whispers, and by 1 AM, you, Z, and Storm were all huddled up in your little twin trailer bed. They snored softly but you couldn't seem to sleep. Just as you were .1 seconds away from drifting off, your phone buzzed next to you.

Angus☁️: u uppppp

-oh wow yeah that's not the most fboy thing ever to send at 1:27 am

Angus☁️:  see all you had to say was yes you didn't have to do allat

-can i help you mr cloud

Angus☁️: what typa help you offering?

-whatever help you need.

Angus☁️: you finna have some more beef dreams tonight?

-you finna get a boner if you see me in my bra again?

Angus☁️: maybe.

-then i'll say maybe too.

Angus☁️: you're too much

-i know i am, did you film today?

Angus☁️: ye i had some scenes wit jacob

-wit

Angus☁️: leave me alone

-you texted me

-and wow you sound really mature rn not at all like a five year old

Angus☁️: if i was w you rn id make you regret that

-was that supposed to be a threat or a way to try to make me sext

Angus☁️: both

-you should go text all the hoes you have waiting for you at home

Angus☁️: im texting them at the same time

-boy...

Angus☁️: im plAyin

Angus☁️: only you :)

-getting soft???

Angus☁️: no and i wish this was instagram dms so i could unsend it fuck

-fuck

Angus☁️: thats another thing you was saying during your ‘nightmare’

-STOP NO I WAS NOT

Angus☁️: yeah i know you wasnt lmao i just like messing w you

-you can mess w me whenever you want to

Angus☁️: oh bet????

-goodnight angus

Angus☁️: nah i want you to tell me about me messing w you

Angus☁️: damn you really left

Angus☁️: thats wrong 

Angus☁️: doing me dirty

-GTS MY PHONE KEEPS GOING OFF

Angus☁️: then put it on silent?

-NO

Angus☁️: ill stop being annoying if you come over here

-i cant, im w z and storm too

Angus☁️: shit okay well it was worth a shot

-why, what was you planning to do

Angus☁️: cuddle

-its fr time for you to go bed, i think your sleepiness is making you too soft and taking the hood away

Angus☁️: goodnight

-goodnight

Angus☁️: gn

-gn

Angus☁️: night

-night

Angus☁️: GOODNIGHT

-OKAY GN

Angus☁️: STOP REPLYING

Angus☁️: night

-

taglist:

@nikkixostan @melaninmarvel @celiajrs @siriuslycollins

[lifeofbouyd]

Runaway girl

#Repost

I became way more sexually active when I entered high school. It was as if I had a craving that could not be filled. The more I had sex the more I wanted sex. These girls lived, ate and dreamt sex. This put me on top of the sex chain in 7th grade. Being the only sexually active boy in the class had girls wanting my dick as if I was King. I never really paid much attention to the girls in my class even though I did eventually bang a few. I was more in to older girls who were much more mature and fully into sex. There was this real sexy girl who sat in my lap one day while heading to the town from school. She wined to every song that played, even gun songs lol. This made my dick hard as steel in my pants and everytime she felt it she looked at me and smiled. Keep smiling, I’m a fuck you soon real hard too. Unfortunately I had only said that in my mind lol. Kill me dead I said it out loud. I took her number and saved it as girl I want to fuck because at the time I didn’t know her name. I forgot I had her number until a few weeks later when I saw her in devotion.

Her: pussy, yuh style mi

Me: wat yuh talking bout

Her: yuh tek mi number an no link mi

Me: I forgot

She took my number and texted me same time so this way I would have no excuse not to text her back.

We text/sext all day that day and were on the phone for a long time in the night. I told her how I wanted to fuck her and she told me all the things she wanted to do. I wacked off to the thought of her getting all crazy and doing the shit she said she had planned to do. She promised a blow job like a vacuum and a ride like a rodeo. She planned to fuck my brains out. Wow, a blow job. I’ve never had one of those. Most the girls I was fucking thought that was nasty and claimed they’d never do it. Funny enough they were published year’s later sucking big black pipes lol. We met a few days later at the farm at lunchtime with intentions of her sucking on my snakehead. Anxiety ran through my veins like blood while I imagined what was to come. I had seen blow jobs on many occasions and always wanted to experience it.

By the time we started kissing I was as horny as a monkey for a banana and she was gonna be the monkey eating the banana lol. All this shit was about to go down. I started fingering her while we tongue wrestled. This chick was great at kissing, she made it feel like it was better than sex. She braced her pussy on my leg and slowly moved her waist. If I didn’t know better I would say she was already on my dick. She pulled my zip down and took out my rod.

Antoinette: wow, is this your birthmark?

Me: yeah it is

Antoinette: how did it get there lol

Me: I have no idea but I’m glad that’s where it is

Antoinette: I love it. It’s like strawberry chocolate.

((((Muah))))

She kissed the head 😮. My other head exploded with excitement and my knees got shaky. ((((muah)))) She kissed it again but this time it was a long sucking kiss. She slowly ran her tongue around the rim of the snakes head as if she was trying to separate it from the rest.

Me: Oh….. My….. God….. (((Heavy breathing))) it feels………….. So….. Weird….

Antoinette: Told you it would blow your mind. Relax and let me take care of you. I tried, real hard but my legs kept shaking. She started sucking while stroking. Slowly my dick slid down her throat; you know that feeling you get when you go really high on a swing or fast over a bump while in a car. Lol. That’s how I felt, like I was running out of breath. Shit, I had to beg her to stop. Lol I couldn’t hold the feeling, I literally felt like she was sucking my life out.

Antoinette: you don’t like it?

Me: Idk, it feels too good lol

I could see the disappointed look on her face as if she wished she had an undo botton to take the blowjob back. I loved it to be honest but I just wasn’t sure if that’s how I was supposed to feel. I was running out of breath and it would be a real disappointment to die while getting a blowjob 🤣. Who does that? Still horny as ever I decided I was gonna fuck the disappointment off her face. I bent her over on a desk top while I tried forcing my dick in. As wet as she was her pussy was tight. I kept poking her slowly until the head finally slipped in. A deep moan was the response.

Antoinette: ((((ouch)))) nuh mash it up now

Me: shhhh 🤫

With 1 hand on her shoulder and the other on her waist I slowly stroked her. As soon as she got super wet and I started making love to the pussy my friend came.

Steve: yow, a time fi class. Di oda pikni dem a come.

She flipped off the dick and got herself together. As for me, it wasn’t that easy; my dick was way too hard to bend lol 🤣 it took me minutes to get it down and turn it long way in my pants. It was so obviously stiff I had to put my bag across my waist. She kissed me on the cheek and walked away with smirk 😏on her face. Lucky for her she came; unfortunately for me, I had a dick as hard as steel shooting across my pants. Sigh, fuck my life. When I got home she had sent a long message, some shit going on at home.

Antoinette: Hey, I’m home. I wanna talk to you about something. I feel like running away. I don’t even know where I’m gonna go but I’m tried of my mom. She keeps stressing me out. Blah blah blah and more blah blah that I don’t remember. Can I come stay with you?

Of course I thought she was joking. Random bulshit talk to start a conversation.

Me: Yes babe, you can come stay with me whenever you want.

Antoinette: Ok, I’ll come weekend.

I had forgotten we made plans for her to run away because as I said I thought it was a just joke. Friday evening here she comes with 2 big bags 😮. I was shocked out of my life. Is this girl serious. ”A wanda if she lick her head”.

Me: Babes I didn’t know you were serious about this. Why didn’t you tell me yesterday you were coming for real?

Antoinette: Why would I be joking? I told you I need to get away from my mom. Are we going to your house or not?

I thought for a second, what’s the worst that could possibly happen. Other than dying while getting a blowjob there was nothing holding me back lol 😂. I called the helper and told her to cook extra because my friends are coming over. We chilled at the game shop for awhile the headed home. Even though I always brought girls home no one ever caught me in the act. I went in first then pulled her through back door of my room like always. She fell asleep the moment we got settled, I guess she was real tried. I took me a shower and got us some food to eat. She kept smiling as if she was about to propose; as if she had woken up to prince charming and breakfast in bed. By this time everyone else was sleeping so she went and took a shower. I had always seen this girl in her clothes and considered her a trophy but seeing her naked was on a different level. Remember that feeling you had when you got that Christmas present you always wanted when you were a kid. That’s how I felt when she took the towel off.

Antoinette: I hope you don’t mind me sleeping naked

Me: Not at all 😏 I sleep naked too lol

Instantly I took my clothes off and dived into bed. She laid beside me and for a second I acted like wasn’t greedy. Unfortunately, my dick holding up the sheet gave me away. She pushed her hand under and massaged it slowly while kissing me on my neck. My body got confused as she slowly kissed my sides and my legs. Chills ran through my body as if I was taking an ice cold shower. I couldn’t stay still for not even a second. She so gently slid her tongue all over the candy stick before wrapping around d edge of the head. I wanted to scream, I wanted to laugh, I even wanted to run. But my fucking legs were so weak I couldn’t even stop shaking. If I didn’t know better I’d say I had a nerve problem lmao😂. She sat on my dick with her hands squeezing my neck. Swiftly she moved her waist while I gasped for breath with her tits in my mouth. Her cum dripped down my balls while she shaked and made her face up. This girl had the weirdest look on her face when she was cumming lol I couldn’t help but laugh. Sometimes she even looked like she was constipated 🤣. We fucked like animals all weekend long. And during this time no one knew she was there until Monday morn before school. I got carried away fucking her in the bathroom. She screamed out while I was striking her from back. Not even realizing what just happened, the helper pushed the bathroom door.

Helper: 😮Bouyd. What the hell is this?

Me: 😮

Antoinette: 😮

Helper: Who is this?

Me: My friend from school

Helper: young miss yu need fi find yu yard right now.

Antoinette walked out the bathroom without a word while the helper kept talking. As far as I can remember she kept staring at my dick the entire time she spoke. I think she was jealous. When I got home from school the helper came to my room to talk about what happened. She said it’s ok to bring girls over but I just gotta be discreet. She had just given consent to the devil to be evil lol. What she didn’t know was Antoinette was in the closet 😂 patiently waiting for her to leave. She stayed the entire week and planned to stay another. It’s as if we had forgotten she ran away from home. I was in class the day the cops and her parents came. They threatened to send her to juvi if she didn’t tell where she was all this time but she didn’t rat me out. I didn’t hear from her for about a month because they had transferred her to a school in Kingston.

Antoinette: Hey Bouyd, I miss you. I just got my phone back. Blah blah blah. Can I come see you?

Me: I miss you too and I can’t wait to see you. When can you come?

Antoinette: Today

Me: Ok

I went to meet her only to see her with a big travelling bag 😮🤦‍♂. I didn’t even bother to ask why she had it lol my guts said it all. This girl just ran away again. I called the helper and told her to except a visitor. For some reason I just knew this girl was not going home anytime soon. I didn’t even think about the consequences that followed this encounter. The helper and her became friends within the first week. I came home to dinner and a damn sexy chick each evening. Even though it was summer I always had some where to be. Life doesn’t get better than this. Her mom and cops kept calling but we didn’t give a shit, for all we cared we had each other. My aunt came to visit one day and realized she was staying with me. She believed in being 30 before having sex. This woman wanted no one there even though she didn’t live there. I came home to an empty bed that night 😞. A broken heart in my chest and emotions I couldn’t control. I cried like a baby. I called her for weeks but got no response 😞. I became an emotional wreck. Being robbed of my happiness and the one thing worth living for at the time made me a monster. I didn’t even wanna hear about another relationship. It was already too late when I realized I had fallen in love with her. I was so fucked up I didn’t even have sex for 6 months. I poured my heart out in a message one day only to get a reply saying;

Hi, my daughter already has a boyfriend here and she does not wish to speak with you. I would like for you to leave her alone. No calls, no text no nothing. Thank you. Or something close to that effect.

Shit, why me. Was I not eligible for love, don’t I deserve to be happy too? This even made things worst. Sex became a sport for me. No feelings, no attachments just random hits. She had left a Mark on me or a curse as I used to call it. I ran into her a few months later at champs. So surprised to see me she jumped in my lap and started kissing me. I didn’t even remember I went with someone that day; we headed for the bathroom where shit got real. So anxious for each other we both came several times in no time. It was like epic make up we could get caught sex. The adrenaline was way too intense to bare. I was so beat out I could hardly catch my breath. We stayed there in the bathroom for a while and talked about shit. Not shit shit but life shit. Turns out her mom had taken her phone and she had no idea about the message. She just kept crying when I told her. A fight started in the bathroom between her and the chick I went with. I had totally forgotten her, shit. I had to part the cat fight before it got out of hand. And these girls had the audacity to turn on me 🤦‍♂. I was so damn tired from fucking and trying to part them I could hardly defend myself. Lol, I got myself a black eye to take back home; I guess it was the consolation prize. I had won myself a fuck and a black eye but again lost Antoinette. I didn’t even get her new number.

I found her on Facebook a few years back. I doubted it was her until I read her post: ”I remember when I ran away, best time of my life. B.A.S I hope you’re happy where ever you are”. I messaged with high expectations of banging her again. Unfortunately she was no longer in the country and she was engaged to be married. She had changed and I was happy for her. Who thought my runaway girl would ever get married. Shit, she looked like a queen in her dress; she slew that wedding. I ain’t heard from her since. Guess she ran away for good this time. Either way, she’ll forever be my Runaway girl.

[truemanblack]

A/N: guess who’s back? I think the only day I won’t be updating is on this Thursday? I’ve been in a writing mood! but hey I made a playlist and I’m slowly adding to it. You can listen to it RIGHT HERE!!!

The Marriage: Part Four  Two Three

Harry and I had been sexting all day. It was funny how it started, looking back at our texts. It was so causal, I could see him sitting in his desk in class sending me these. While I was walking around some random mall in California. I was always curious why Harry went to a school in San Diego instead of Los Angeles. There was something about Los Angeles I hated, it was full of snobs and I just couldn’t deal. I was looking for a dress to wear on Saturday for our wedding (it’s still bizarre to say that). I was in the middle trying to decide if the dress I’m looking at was wedding “appropriate” Low cut front, nice and flowy, backless. Then a ping went off when I was pulling it off the rack. 

Harry: God, I can’t wait to be properly buried inside of you. You’ll be begging me to stop.

I love how Harry still kept up his proper English in his texts, for some reason it really turned me on. I took the dress to the dressing room as I was trying to figure out a good reply.

Aimee: Hm, I don’t think I’ll be the one begging to stop. I think you’ll be so drained of cum you’ll have to stop.

I gave myself a pat on the back for that one, along with sending him a nice nude pic for him to simmer with while I tried on the dresses I’ve gathered. I hated shopping, I tried to convince Harry to wear Hawaii shirts, but he noted we did have to be a little serious, the fat Elvis was already pushing it. The dress I was worried would be too “flashy” was the only one I liked. I think Harry wouldn’t mind it either, well come to think of it, I don’t think he cares I think he’s going to be thinking about taking it off. The next thing was buying a ring for Harry, which was going to be hard, since he’s flashy as ever with his rings. I was thinking a simple white gold band, so it wouldn’t clash too much with his others, cheaper as well, I only had so much I put away for splurging. I heard a ding on my phone – which for some reason startled me.

              “Hey there,” I looked up from my dirty text from Harry. Axel, of fucking course, it’s him.

Harry: You still think you’re in control, eh? I think not. I think your cute little ass would look covered in bruises.

That one made me squirm a bit, that a was weakness, and his hands were nice.

              “Hey,” I said shyly trying to cool down face, so I wouldn’t be blushing too hard.

              “What are you up to?” Oh shit. Harry and I discussed this morning, after a nice make out session, that we must start telling people about us so if immigration reaches out people will know we got married.

              “Wedding dress shopping.” I shrugged, though I was screaming on the inside. I could tell Axel would try to control a girl, but I really wanted to put him in his place after graduation.

              “Oh,” He was taken aback, “You’re getting married?”

              “Yeah, Harry and I-”

              “Harry?” I nodded, and pretty pissed he irrupted me. “They guy you were with the other day.”

              “Uh, yes, my boyfriend.”

              “I’m confused.”

              “Well, I think he’s my fiancé right now, but we’ve been friends for so long and we kinda of just fell into it and impulsively just decided to get hitched this weekend, and to see The Beatles cirque du soleil.”

              “Oh, well congrats, I have to get going.” Axel walked off before I could even say goodbye. I was more shocked that he fucking believed me. I needed to reply to Harry before he thought he got me.

Aimee: What about your cute little perky ass, daddy? It needs some lovin’

I sent him another nude I took while in the dressing room. I felt good about that one, not my best, but he was probably hard on his way home. I ordered and uber and made my way home, hoping to be there before Harry.

Which I did, I was running to my bedroom to find the shorts. Well Simon dubbed them the ass eating shorts, because they were pretty much doing that. I remember when I first moved in, I wore them around Harry and I couldn’t even to get him to respond to me, of course, I was loving it, but I had to be all shy and act as if I hated it; and stored them away. I heard the door unlock and I quickly put on a sweatshirt and walked out to see Harry.

              “Hey,” I watched him as he glared at me as he kicked off his shoes. “Hello?” I tried to act annoyed, but I knew he was truly annoyed. I walked towards him and put my hands on his back as he was walking towards the kitchen.

              “You’re such a brat,” He sighed shaking his head and I gave a pinch to his butt. He turned around and wrapped his arms around my waist, causing me to yelp. He picked me up and walked up both to the couch. I couldn’t help but to laugh as he did, he had me over his shoulder – which just made me continue to squeeze and pinch at his ass. “You think you’re so cute?” His voice was low as he threw me down on the couch. (Which was very hot, I was very turned on by that). I giggled in return as he straddled over me. “Take your hoodie off.”

              “No, I have nothing on under there.” I closed my eyes as he slipped his hands under the hoodie. “Plus, you get to see me all in less than two days, can’t you hold out.”

              “Not when you’re giving me photo preview and not a real one.”

              “You’re such a greedy boy, Harold.” My voice was low, and a smirk played on my lips. He was rolling his eyes while his hands were busy touching my bare torso. As they inched up towards my breasts. “You go there, and I’m going to punish you.” I moved one of my legs around his knee.

              “Yeah, I feel like you’re the one who needs punishing. You’re just teasing me, calling me daddy, you’re being a brat.”

              “Aw boohoo, Harold isn’t getting what he wants, how sad.” I brought one of my hands up to knuckle at my pretended to cry, which just made him hold one of my arms above my head.  So many girls got away with just being a ‘good girl’ to Harry. “I’m not a dog, so you’ll never see me be a good girl.” I tried to sit up and was quickly pushed back down by Harry. He pressed his hips to mine and moved his hand to my throat. I gripped his wrist and tried to give him an Indian burn to have him let go.

              “Can’t talk now, huh?” I pointed at his hand and rolled my eyes, he tightened his hand and I moved my foot to his stomach – which caused him to let go. He looked surprised and let go. I think he thought I was at my limit, which made me feel good. All the times he made my gullible ass believe him. I pouted and put my hands around my neck as if I was in pain. “I’m sorry, was that too much?” He was off the couch by now kneeled in front of me.

              “I jus-” I stood up and he followed me. “I can’t believe you’re so gullible.” I groaned as I tackled him to the ground. I put one of my hands around his neck – it wasn’t as effective as his was, which just made him smirk.

              “Aw, look at you, trying to be all tough.” I rolled my eyes as I looked on my person to tie his wrist with. The string from my hoodie will do. I quickly yanked it out and tried my best to get his wrist to his chest. “You’re not doing that, it’s gonna come loose, you know little brat, it’s not gonna stay.” I tied tighter, hoping the rough cotton would leave a mark.

              “Do you ever just shut the fuck up?” I groaned taking the hair tie from his wrist and pulling my hair up it. Tonight, Harry was going to learn, I really loved orgasm denial. I moved between his legs and started undoing his belt, then letting his jeans pop open. They were obviously too tight on him; the belt kept his pants buttoned. “Lift your hips,” I looked at him and a smirk was all over hips lips. “Lift your hips.” He still didn’t budge. So, I yanked his jeans off as roughly as I could. I heard him suck in his breath. “If you just listen to me, I won’t hurt you.”

Harry was already hard, I mean I already knew that, but he was really hard. His underwear was already stained with pre-cum. I pulled at the band, and Harry lifted his waist. I didn’t want to encourage him at all. But wow, he has a beautiful cock. Just like art, cocks are very subjective. If there was a cock louvre, his would be the Mona Lisa. The head was already blushing red, a vein that ran up the side. It was twitching a bit, I think he knew what was going on.

              “Are yeh gonna do anythin’?” The drunker or (now finding out) hornier Harry got, the thicker his accent got.

              “I kinda of want you to beg.” I put my arms on each of his knees. “I would like that, very much actually.”

              “For fucks sake.” He groaned, and I pouted.

              “Oh, I suddenly remember, I don’t want to suck your cock.” I sighed and crooked my head to my side. “Unless you wanna convince me.”

              “You know I can get up right?”

              “But are you? I mean you have me right here, between your legs, with your cock right there.” I blinked at him and he arched his back and groaned. “I mean, I think my mouth is the closest thing you’ll get right now to what you would call ‘my pretty little cunt’, hm? What do you think, baby?”

              “Please.” He whispered. I could get up and do a happy dance.

              “I’m sorry, I couldn’t here you, baby.”

              “Please.” He spoke up a bit more, it wasn’t enough. I really wanted to get it out of him. He was gripping at his fingers and twirling at his rings – since it was the only things he could grab at.

              “Please what? I don’t speak baby talk.” He huffed, and I couldn’t be more excited, I could let him cum, but I’m not.

              “Please suck me.” He whispered, I could tell that’s probably the most I was going to get out of him – well at least now. I would try at a later date to have him whine that. I grinned and gladly took him into my mouth. I wanted to tease him, so I took just the head in giving it a light suck, then licking up his length. I paused for a second looking at him, his eyes were open, and pupils dilated. I grinned and heard him whine, I’m assuming from me holding out for so long. I took him in my mouth, hollowing my cheeks and finding a rhythm. I kept my hands at his base to give me a break now and again, but I craved his weight on my tongue. I took him in deeper, trying to get most of his length (which would be a bit difficult) but I could tell he was close.

              “Yeh can’t even get all of me in yeh pretty little mouth, take it easy.” He was breathy, his cock was twitchy, and I knew I had to stop. Especially after that.

I stood up and brushed off my clothes. “Yeah no.” I groaned and started to walk towards the kitchen.

              “What the fuck!” Harry yelled as I shuffled through the kitchen to find a water bottle. “You did this already before, you fucking, can’t.”

              “I just did.” I grinned looking back at him. I felt like it was a but unfair to leave him tied up. I started walking towards him and untie his wrists and quickly walked away from him.

              “I can’t fucking stand you, why do you keep doing this to me.” Harry quickly stood up pulling his pants and underwear up.

              “Don’t talk to me the way you did, and I won’t do that.” I grinned, and he pinned me against the wall. I could still feel how hard he was just from him pressing his hips to mine. He quickly turned me around so my chest to was towards the wall and held my wrists in his hand while the other has my ponytail wrapped roughly around his hand.

              “You better fucking listen good,” Harry’s lips were right against my ear. “I’m going to let you cum, and it’s the only time you’ll feel cum coming out of that greedy little cunt of yours all weekend.” I giggled as he spoke, I just couldn’t take him seriously as he just was begging for me moments before. He let go of my ponytail and roughly pulled my shorts down. “You knew what you were doing the moment you put those shorts on, you didn’t even wear panties you, little slut.” His fingers quickly found their way inside of me and he was thrusting them hard and fast. I was on my tip toes. I bit at my lips so he wasn’t able to get not even a moan from me, except I knew I was gonna cum really quick since it’s been so long.

              “Look at yeh,” He breathed in my ear as his thumb found its way to my clit and he was roughly circling it. “Drippin’ for me, all down yeh legs.” I could feel skin break from inside my lip. I was so close, and he said he was going to let me cum. I closed my eyes as he changed his pace, making his fingers drag out slowly while his thumb stayed at the same pace. “Cum, yeh not gonna be doin’ it for long.” I tried to hold out longer, but I could feel it in the pit of my stomach. I closed my eyes and exhaled, I was just proud that he didn’t get a sound out of me. He kept going until I started stomping my feet.

              “Stop!” I groaned, and he pulled away. He slipped his fingers in his mouth and moaned.

              “Such a shame I won’t be tasting that for a bit.” I rolled my eyes and pulled my shorts back up. I pulled my hair out of the ponytail and moved to Harry on the couch. “I did get to cum,” He was back to his cool calm self. I shook my head and rested against the arm of the couch. “I do mean it no cum for you.”

              “Can’t deny your wife like that.” I replied, and he smirked.

              “I mean I have a whole year to not have you cum.”

              “You wouldn’t fucking dare.” Harry laughed, and his dimples popped out. He glanced over at me before lancing his fingers and looking at them.

              “You’re oddly, okay about this.” He glanced at me, his face was softened. “Like, I’m totally cool with it don’t get me wrong, but you’re like really okay with it.”

              “I currently don’t have a brain; vagina has taken over.” It was true, I wasn’t really thinking about my actions or thinking this through. “The marriage, I’m for sure about, the sex, you’re gonna have to fuck me a few times before the haze is gone.”

              “You’re a dick for brains right now?” Harry laughed his eyebrow raising.

              “That’s all you got out of that?”

              “No, I just know I’m gonna have to prepare for spazzy anxiety Aimee again soon.” He shrugged. “It’s not a bad thing, just means I’ve got to figure out a way to last longer. Keep you blissed out.”

              “Jesus Christ."

[soft-sarcasm]

kim seokjin: lost in translation.

Pairing: kim seokjin x reader. ft. kim namjoon.

Summary: due to unfortunate timing and some out of context eavesdropping, roommates Seokjin and Y/N have been forced into a constant push and pull of thinking they've both been put in the friend zone by the other. So while Y/N takes out her obvious feelings of sexual and emotional frustration by searching for something to keep her busy, Seokjin instead festers in his own pettiness with an extra side of bitter while they both continue to be the close friends they are. But apparently Y/N finding her distraction in Kim Namjoon was the final straw and every word lost in translation suddenly begins to make sense.

Genre: roomate!au, smut, angst, sarcasm,  seokjin at the height of his passive aggressiveness.

Word count: 9+k

a/n: this took me like 5+ months to write after I basically forgot about it, but here it is, my first ever completed smut. are you allowed to dedicate this to people? because if so, can I dedicate it to @tayegi who I feel like is the majority of kpop smut writers inspiration and guide in this crazy world. 

"You're both fucking ridiculous."

Your neck ached with the momentum it carried as it snapped up in the direction of the overly bitter statement, eyes wide and lips parting in disbelief. Your usually well tempered and calm to a fault roommate Seokjin had just said quite possibly the most aggressive thing you had ever heard pass through those pillow-like lips.

Your mind spun as you blinked, completely taken off guard. "I'm sorry, what?"

He simply scoffed, taking a long swig from the drink that swirled within his glass, usually caramel warm gaze fathomlessly dark as he continued to take in the scene before him. "You and Namjoon, it's ridiculous! You either need to fuck or stop looking at each other like you want to."

"I- what- no!" You started to stutter and fumble, your slightly intoxicated brain running at the speed of light as you attempted to assemble your thoughts back into order. Were your intentions that obvious? So much so that even your most oblivious of roommates could pick up on it? You thought you were being subtle enough, only glancing over in the strawberry blonde man's direction from your spot on the opposite side of the raucous club every other minute. But apparently your efforts were null and you were caught, not that you were going to let Jin know that. "I don't know what you're talking about Jin."

"I'm talking about how you've been undressing poor Joonie with your eyes for the past half an hour and it's fucking nauseating. Fuck or fucking move on."

Again you were utterly flabbergasted. Okay, maybe you had been making the eyes at Namjoon who you had been intensely flirting with for the past week or so (and who you quite possibly had wanted to bed for longer then that because holy shit how is it legal for someone to be that adorable and that hot all once?) So maybe yes, you weren't being the most discreet person in the world with your intentions but that in no way gave Jin any right to point it out.

Jin had been your roommate for almost three semesters now after a glitch in the system had paired you guys together and by the time the error was realised all other dorms had been taken. At the beginning it had been awkward to say the least, both of you fumbling around each other, remaining fully dressed in common areas at all time, and stuttering apologies whenever you bumped into each other in the tiny kitchen you shared.

Months later there was no awkwardness to speak of. After moving past the initial discomfort of living with someone of the opposite sex and quickly realising that you had a shit ton in common you became increasingly comfortable around each other, some might say even too comfortable. Now you would purposefully jab elbows into each other as you both cooked and no longer had to change in the bathroom when you now strutted past each other in towels with no shame at all. Jin was kind and funny and all around just quite possibly the most genuine person you had ever met. Which was why his current behaviour was that much more confusing.

You took a large gulp of your gin and tonic to hide the pink haze that now coated your cheeks as you attempted to retain at least a fraction of your pride that your roommate was currently digging his patten leather Chelsea boots into. "Whatever Jin, I can look as much as I want. Looking is not a crime."

"But making me choke on your guys' sexual tension is." He stated, tone something balancing between irritation and something you couldn’t quite make out that might have been just further irritation. "But whatever, don't fuck, it doesn't matter to me. Though you'd probably be dodging a bullet, I heard that his size doesn't translate if you get my drift."

You actually choked, spluttering a cough as your eyes widened to saucers and you were quickly sipping up a hand to slap it across Jin's bicep. "What the fuck Jin! You don't just go around saying shit like that!"

He simply shrugged, undeterred. "I only speak the truth and we both know it. Tell me Namjoon doesn't look like he has a small dick. It'd probably take him hours to get you off."

Your ears were burning at this point, pushing past the original shock you once felt towards your usually passive friend's completely 180 shift in personality to now becoming increasingly irritated. "For your information, I have it on good authority that his dick is quite sizable thank you very much."

"Whose good authority?" He challenged, gaze becoming increasingly darkening as he pinned you down with it.

"Mine," You retaliated, not having the time to bite your tongue out like you now wanted to do as the word passed your lips. Fuck. You should not have said that and that fact was made even more evident by Jin's suddenly offensive stance he was now taking to you as he edged closer to you, making you instantly fumble in your heels to put more space between the two of you.

"And pray tell," He began, making an unnecessary movement to run his bright pink tongue over his lips causing you to gulp. "How did you acquire this information?"

You were beyond frazzled, cheeks blazing and insides squirming as embarrassment seared through you. But then you collected yourself. No. You would not be shamed for something a guy would happily share with his friends and get a slap on the back for. You took a step forward so that you were now standing all but chest to chest with your roommate. You had no idea why this stand off had even started in the first place but you were not about to be the one who caved and stepped down.

"We've been texting," You stated, the last words coming out as suggestive as possible so your message was conveyed. "I showed him mine so he showed me his. If you catch my drift."

There was a moment where Jin just stared at you and you instantly regretted your previous bravado.So you and Namjoon sexted one very wine induced night where you had been rather tipsy (and horny) and had decided to try on some of that lingerie your best friend had bought you and you had yet to use. And that led you taking pictures, because damn you looked fine, and that led your drunken self to send a picture to Namjoon. And that led him to send one back. One hour later you were giggling happily to yourself as you went to bed drunk and satisfied. But unfortunately, nothing had happened since then. Actually, you were almost certain that Namjoon had been avoiding you since and if that wasn't mortifying enough Jin now knowing what happened between the two of you definitely was.

But whatever, you, and your third gin and tonic couldn't actually give a shit anymore what he thought, especially while he definitely shouldn't be commenting on your sex life, or lack thereof, when he wasn't much better. The walls of your shared apartment were thin and you knew for a fact that the only action he'd been getting for past month or so was himself. You didn't care that this fight (or whatever the fuck this was because where did this sudden outburst even come from?) was completely unreasonable, he had started it and you were sick of his judgement. So you willed your face into a mask of unabashed steel and stared back at him.

You grew tired of his silence and rolled your eyes, ready to make your way out of this far too confusing situation. "If you have no further comment on my sex life I'm going to leave. Find me when your sober and finished being a bitter, horny bastard."

You took your opening, moving to flee the scene as you stepped passed Jin's impossibly broad shoulders. You bobbed and weaved your way through the crowd, heading in the direction of the bar because your gin and tonic was getting dangerously low and you needed alcohol to think right now. You just couldn't get over the randomness of Jin's sudden outburst or the source of this sudden of his poorly concealed anger. You had openly pined after people before and all Jin had ever done was be supportive. From start to finish, the situation was entirely fucked up and you were attempting to wrap your head around the actual meaning behind it when a familiar strawberry blonde appeared beside you.

"_____," Namjoon beamed, his dimples digging deep into his round cheeks as he said your name loudly over the pulsating house song that blared out of the speakers.

Your eyes widened as you fumbled for words, "Namjoon, hey."

"How you doin'?"

You wanted to raise an eyebrow. Was he really attempting small talk when your last conversation consisted of him stating just how much he wanted to be inside of you, while you promised to suck him off like a good girl? Fuck you were cringy when you were drunk. But despite all of this you still smiled. "'M great and you?"

He shrugged, "The usual."

"Sounds, riveting." And then there was a pause and you thought you were going to shrivel up and die because shit, this was fucking awkward.

"I've actually been meaning to message you," He suddenly blurted, and suddenly your focus sharpened because here it was. "I wanted to talk about our little," He paused as he attempted to grasp the correct word for the hour-long session you had both taken part in that you still had the evidence of in your gallery, "Conversation, last week."

Your brain started running a mile per second. You knew where this situation was going, it was going in the direction of 'you're great and all but I think we're better off as friends.' You started assessing how you could possibly turn this situation in your favour because fuck if you weren't even more frustrated now thanks to Seokjin and the idiotic tirade he had decided to spew out of nowhere. So in an act of alcohol-induced bravado, you stepped forward, the most seductive smirk you could muster carving its way onto your lips. "I actually wanted to speak to you about that too. I had so much," You staring directly at him now, tracing a single finger down the centre of his chest, "Fun. I mean I'd love to do it again, though I'd much prefer to continue our conversation in person this time."

There was a flicker of something that might have translated to willingness on his face as his gaze switched almost frantically between your wandering finger and your ever enticing smile. But then it was gone and he was taking a step back and you were sighing with mild disappointment because dammit. "I actually wanted to talk about how I don't think we should have one of our conversations again. I think it may be best if we just-"

"-Remain as friends?" You finished for him with a poorly concealed expression of ever-increasing irritation and indifference.

Apparently, it was concealed enough for Namjoon who sighed in visible relief, "So you agree then? Friends?"

"Of course Namjoon," You cooed, batting your eyelashes despite the ice in your tone at the blatant rejection you were being forced to receive with a smile because it would be clingy and needy if you actually voiced your opinion on the matter and how you didn't want to be friends, or at least not tonight when all you wanted was for him to follow you to your dorm room and fuck you until next Christmas. But instead, being the person you were who knew that while he may be painfully oblivious to the fact that you don't usually sext with a girl and then say you're not interested in going any further without the altercation usually ending up with at least some colourful words being exchanged, Namjoon wasn't a malicious guy and the reason why he was backing off was probably for something moral like him not wanting to take advantage of you when really you just wanted him to take you from behind.

Fuck, maybe you are needy.

His smile brightened and next thing you knew you were given a pat on the shoulder as he began to move past you, "I'll see you around, take care of yourself."

And with that, your activity for the evening was cancelled and you were left high and dry with nothing but the knowledge that at least you had yourself to keep you company, and that while there had been no true grantee with Namjoon, at least you knew that you could get yourself off. Though you had a very sneaking suspicion that those long, slender fingers knew exactly what they were doing. No, you couldn't think like this. You couldn't think about how lonely it was going to now be to return to your dorm and have to take care of your own needs, or worse, the mortification of now facing Seokjin with the reality of being rejected.

Your night had officially been ruined.

Without a moment of hesitation, you headed for the exit, slipping your arms into the leather jacket that had been loosely thrown over your shoulders on and pulling it close to your body as you exited the pulsating space and out into the clean, crisp 23:30 air. The cold hit you like a bullet of clarity and suddenly you were berating yourself for your own neediness before you began to make your way in the direction of your dorm that thankfully wasn't more than a few buildings down. As you marched your way down the pavement, knee-high boots clicking in succession to each of your powerful strides, you almost wanted to laugh at yourself. How had you allowed yourself to become so dependant on the attention of another person that you had actually been disappointed when rejection had come? You had forever steeled yourself into being a collage of sharp edges and snarky remarks that had never been concerned with the approval of anyone else and had never been the one who had gone seeking the attention of others for your own pleasure. Perhaps it was Jin's behaviour that had set you off, the abnormality of sending you into a spiral of confusion and frustration that had translated into you wanting to sleep with Namjoon that later resulted in you feeling rather awful after a perhaps extremely polite rejection, a rejection none the less.

Whatever the case was, you had felt dejected and you fucking hated it. You now wanted to wash the sensation from your skin because how should it be far that one person's opinion, whose opinion you never really cared for as much as you cared for other parts of his person, matter so much? It was fucking pathetic, that's what it was, and painfully human. To the point that by the time you had arrived back into your dorm, you were calculating just how many years it would take for science and technology to reach the point where species switch could be possible. But by the time you had removed your jacket and shoes and had unzipped your jeans and were finally back in your natural attire of a large t-shirt and underwear, you had gotten over it. But that was also another part of being human, the art of realising just how stupid you were, laughing at yourself and then continuing on.

So while you were over Namjoon's rejection, you were not over the shift in your roommate's personality. It was not as if he wasn't allowed to be irritated or anything but cherry but he had never acted in such a way when it concerned your love life or anything remotely similar. Of course, there had been the occasions where his opinion had swayed you from a guy but that was just through him letting you know of some of said potential suitor's exploits that as a popular guy, Jin obviously knew better than you a social recluse who didn't keep up with gossip. But tonight had been something different in of itself and you were still reeling if you were being honest. So while you contemplated the rather strange antics of your beloved friend and roommate, curled up on the couch the two of you had shared on the multiple nights you had both come home too drunk or tired to reach your rooms and simply ended up on the couch instead, you sipped gingerly on your usual night time glass of red wine that had become a habit of any night you suspected that your insomnia would play a nasty trick on you and emerge. And from all the rampaging emotions inside of you, you had assumed the worse and had poured yourself a healthy glass of dry merlot and were now enjoying the music of your own thoughts that were playing rather off-key thanks to the previous alcohol you had consumed and the conflict you were dealing with. It probably wasn't as big of a deal as you were making it but you had always been one to over analyse and you couldn't help but start nitpicking ever point in Jin's behaviour during the night.

He had been fine when you had first arrived, the two of you sticking together as you usually did during the rare few parties you actually allowed Jin to drag you too. Jin with his charm and easygoing nature was the perfect shield for your rather awkward and unskilled approach at socialising which usually consisted of saying a brief hello to newcomers before you hid within the people you had grown comfortable with over time. By your second, (or perhaps it had been your third?) drink you had found Namjoon from your position lingering by Jin and had used the distraction of the arrival of one of your roommate's classmate to begin your 'assessing' of Namjoon. You hadn't even realised that it had returned to just being you and Jin until Jin had decided to speak up and start his rant.

What a weirdo.

And as if the very term were his own personal summons, the door to your dorm burst open and was then proceeded by the rather unceremonious entrance of a clearly intoxicated Seokjin. How he continued to look attractive as he stumbled and hiccuped was a mystery in itself.

He only became aware of your presence after a few moments of stumbling about the foyer and even squinted as if to fully discern if you were actually real. "Why are you here?"

You scoffed a laugh, taking another leisurely sip of wine before you deemed it an appropriate time to respond. "I do live here Jin, I have a right to be here whenever I please. Or do you now also have an opinion on the amount of time I spend in our apartment?"

It was his turn to roll his eyes now as he began to wrestle with the zips of his boots, "I meant why are you here instead-" He took a moment to grunt his frustration as his boot refused to budge, only to start up again as soon as his foot was released, "-of being with Namjoon. Who according to someone's information is well endowed, though I'm beginning to grow suspicious of today's photo editing skills."

"The reason why I am here is because, after a hearty deliberation, I made the decision to rather return home where I can sleep so I'm not half dead tomorrow when I still have an essay to write." You retorted back before taking another sip of your wine, attempting to smother the rage that was creeping up with the bitter liquid.

"Oh," He dragged at the sound as he finally made it to the lounge after a few amusing moments of him battling with his cream coloured leather jacket. "So that's the reason why you left, I thought it had something to do with the fact that your sexting buddy played the 'friend' card on you. I must have gotten the wrong information then, my bad."

No wine could simmer the anger and heated irritation that now had officially clawed it's way into your system, though you did try as you knocked back the remaining contents of your glass before carefully setting it down on the coffee table and slowly rising from your seat. Why had he asked why you were home in the first place if he already had his own, regretfully correct, assumption of the situation?

It didn't matter that you were probably too scantily clad for this conversation or that 98% of the reason why Jin was saying this was probably was that he was drunk and he would never have even contemplated saying a word of this is he was sober. What you did care about was that you were tipsy and your roommate was being an arrogant, asshole that you were about ready to fight thanks to the wine and gin in your system and the frustration you were feeling due tonight's events. What mattered was that your face was only a few inches away from Jin's and you were ready for a fight.

"Listen here you little shit, you can either apologise now for being a complete asshole to me for no fucking reason or I can show you what growing up with 5 siblings taught me."

And just when you thought he couldn't become anymore infuriating, what did the little shit go and do, he fucking laughed at you. His doe-brown eyes that were usually warm and inviting, crinkling at the corners in mocking amusement. When he finished his tirade, he moved on to patting your head and squatting down just slightly to your inferior height with a shit eating smile. "You're so fucking adorable when you get all frustrated and start thinking that you're all tough and all knowing. It's fucking precious."

Rock struck splint and spark was lit, followed quickly by a raging fire as in a turn of events you were tipping your head up and bringing your teeth down onto soft skin. There was a millisecond of shock followed by a shriek of pain and the lose of contact as he instantly retracted his hand from your mouth.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" He squealed with clutching his injured hand to his chest, face a compilation of complete shock and surprise.

All you could do was smirk, satisfied with your work as you ran your tongue over your teeth before smiling brightly at him. "Don't fucking play with me bitch, I was brought up with wolves."

"Just because your siblings roughhoused doesn't mean you fucking bite people when they irritate you! Who the fuck does that?"

"Someone who's done with some twat's ignorance and stupidity and wants to get their point across." You answered simply while crossing your arms neatly over your chest. He continued to gape at you for a few moments more, and then suddenly there was an all but visible click and he was lunging at you. You let out a small shout of protest and surprise as your legs were tackled out from under you and you were sent back into the carpet with Jin landing on top of you. You spluttered for coherency as you found yourself trapped between the solid body of your roommate and your living rooms floor, chest rising to only deflate at an alarmingly rapid speed.

There was a pause of you simply staring at each other, you in shock while he was a mixture of contempt and something undiscernable.

You were both panting thanks to the sporadic burst of movement and you were still struggling to regain your thoughts when Jin smirked down at you, lowering himself so that his lips brushed your ear. "How's that for getting one's point across?"

You were at a lost for words and while it was mainly due.to the fact that you were still in shock from being tackled by your non-aggressive roommate, you couldn't deny that there was a part of you that had become flustered by the fact that your devastatingly good-looking roommate was currently pressed up against you while you were clothed in nothing but a shirt and underwear. It took you another moment to fully regain yourself and with a simple switch in attitude, you were letting out a defiant cry before you twisted your weight so that your jumble of bodies was forced to roll, resulting in you now on top and determined.

"What the actual fuck is your problem?" You snarled, having to use all of your strength to keep Jin's sculpted arms pinned down as you started directly into his startled eyes. "Why are you acting like this all of a sudden? Why are you all of sudden some opinionated on who and who I don't sleep with? What did I do to make you so irritated with me?"

The air felt as though it had been sucked out of the room as your words lingered in the stillness that had fallen upon you two. It was suffocating, and you could almost hear your far too desperate and frustrated questions ringing in your ears. Jin floundered for a good 30 seconds, opening and closing his mouth as he battled for the words that refused to come as you expectantly waited. And then he sighed in defeat, going limp under your grasp. "It's because I hated that wasn't me."

"What?"

Those were not the words you were expecting and they threw you for a spin as you stared him, utterly unsure of what to do next. He simply exhaled before shutting his eyes for a moment only to reconnect them with yours. "I hated that it wasn't me who you were sending those picture to, that it wasn't me that you couldn't take your eyes off of the entire night. I hated that you chose that asshole to reveal yourself to when all he did was reject you like a fucking dip shit. Like how the fuck does anyone in their right mind think they could possibly find better than you? Because trust me, I've tried, and there isn't anyone."

And then there was silence yet again as your brain attempted to process the amount of crushing information that had just been unloaded onto it. In your surprised state, you released him and slid off to the side, instinctively backing up against the couch as you tried to wrangle your thoughts together. He stayed laying flat for a moment and you swore you heard him say 'as I thought,' before he was pulling himself back to his feet with a surprising amount of coordination and moving in the direction of his room.

"Why didn't you say anything before?" You questioned almost silently though it was clear that he heard by the way his spine pricked and he froze in place. You slowly stood up, remaining stationary in the lounge just behind him. "Why did you never say anything about how you felt this entire time?"

He snapped out a laugh that was nothing short of sarcastic before turning slightly, "Because I didn't want you to react like you are now."

And just like that, your surprise began to be replaced by irritation, "How is my reaction right now so bad that you didn't fucking tell me this dammit?"

"I think you pulling back was a pretty clear indication of what you thought of this entire ordeal. Now if you'd excuse me, I need to go to sleep."

He turned away again to walk back to his room and abruptly you found yourself stalking up to him forcefully spinning him to face you, his eyes read utter confusion while you were all but fuming with another wave of rage. Your grip on his arm tightened as a new found determination course through you, "Listen here you asshole, you don't get to just assume my reaction because I let you go out of shock that my roommate just confessed to me, or did whatever you did just now. I was just processing how much of an idiot you had to be to think I would react better to you being a jealous, angsty asshole instead of you just telling me how you feel! I was also thinking about how much of an absolute dumbass you would have to be to not realise that I've liked you this entire time but I've just not said anything cause you fucking friend zoned me a month into living with me!"

He took a second to just blink at your outburst, mouth open as you continued to silently fume. "Wha-, I friend zoned you?! You friend zoned me!" You let out an offended gasp, "What do you mean I friend zoned you? A month into us living together we were watching some trope filled romantic comedy where the guy was in love with the girl best friend and you said that it was great that we had no feelings towards each other besides platonic because, and I quote, 'it's always just a mess when two good friends get together.'"

"I only said that because I heard you saying to your friend on the phone after a week of us living together that you were so glad that you felt no attraction whatsoever to me and that it would be great to have a strictly platonic male friend because they're 'so hard to find.'" Jin retorted before crossing his arms in defiance causing you to gape at him.

“I was being sarcastic about not being attracted to you because I was going through such a trial of being stuck with a hot, male roommate who I assumed had little to no interest in me because well, look at you!" You exclaimed while gesturing wildly in his general direction to make your point more clear.

Suddenly there was an undeniably smug smirk on his face as he peered down at you, "I'm sorry, did you just called me hot?"

"Of course I did you idiot!" You shouted, not having a single shred of patience to spare as your frustration with the situation continued. "But that's not the point! The point is, is that if you hadn't been an angsty little brat this whole time and kept your feelings a secret we both would have been happily fucking by now and would not be even half as sexually frustrated as we both obviously are right now."

"How is this just my fault?! If you've liked me for as long as you say you have why haven't you come out and said anything huh?" He fired back with equal defiance as he loomed over you.

"You know I never tell anyone my feelings, you should have known better than to wait for my emotionally detached self to make the first move when you're the one who's all good at socialising and being emotionally stable or whatever. Gosh, it's like you don't even know me," With that you threw your arms up in a final display of disbelief before you turned back to him, eyes lit with your next intentions. "So now we obviously need to fuck because I can not actually deal with this sexual tension anymore and I've literally fantasised about this for months."

"Wait," He began to splutter at your blunt words. "You want to do what?"

"Fuck." You said as though you were stating the weather. "Obviously. Weren't you the one just going on about how you wanted to be the one who got sent my dirty pictures, well," You paused to rip the shirt off and over your head leaving you in nothing but your underwear. "Here I am, in person."

So there you were, practically naked and standing in front of your roommate that you had just confessed your feelings too and suddenly doubting if every life decisions you made up until this point, including this one, was just a horrible mistake. But then a searing pair of lips were being slotted against your own and the goosebumps that had once appeared due to the chill that had attacked your exposed skin were replaced by a sizzling heat that started within your centre and spread through your entire body. Jin was finally kissing you. You were finally kissing Jin. You were dazed when he finally pulls back, tongue flicking at your bottom lip as he pulled you in by your waist, nose brushing against your own.

"If this is a dream," He spoke over the soft sounds of your breathless pants, "Then don't tell me. Because this might be the best moment my life." You couldn't help the warm haze that bloomed within you at the sheer care he used to brush a stray piece of hair that had fallen against your cheek. "You're such a cheesy little shit."

You could feel his smile against your lips as he pressed his mouth back to yours and then you were kissing again and it brought you such a bliss that you almost forget that you were basically naked and had just proposed that you wanted to fuck until Jin's hands began to wander and you released that you were at a definite disadvantage. Which was why you began to back him up with your lips still attached until he hit the neighbouring wall and began to tug eagerly at his shirt.

He chuckled, pausing to grant your request and then allowing you a moment to gawk at the sculpted chest you had grown somewhat accustomed to seeing due to Jin's habit of coming out of the shower in nothing but a towel. But you had never been this close or at the liberty to fully appreciate as you were now. Jin obviously found this immensely amusing as he moved to grab at your naked waist before pulling you close to him and refastening your lips together. You hummed in satisfaction when tongues were added and took the moment to suck happily at the muscle causing him to make a sound that was somewhere between a surprised squeak and a groan which causing your lips to curls as your skilled fingers began to work on unfastening the belt on his impossibly tight jeans that you had once mistaken as your own, only to not fit into them and then go on a day-long rant that it wasn't right that he had better legs than you. He had to assist you in the actual removal of the material as there was no way you would be able to take off the skin tight article by yourself. It took him less time then you expected to fully rid himself of his jeans and suddenly you were brought to the realisation that all was left was for you both to remove your underwear and you would officially be naked in front of each other. But while this thought drifted through your brain, Jin seemed less than even slightly bothered as he detached your lips from one another and began to make a downward descent down your body. Suddenly all of your petty worries evaporated like steam as his plump lips graced the outline of your plain cotton underwear and you were suddenly focused on the fact that something you had only dreamed of, and trust you had definitely dreamt of Jin going down on you because good lord those lips, had somehow become your reality.

You physically buckled forward when you were finally exposed to the air that was far cooler than your increasingly hot skin and you realised just how aroused and needy you were. This was the first time you had ever had this reaction to a partner during sex thanks to the inhibitor that you had subconsciously accumulated that caused you to never really be able to emotionally, and sometimes even physically, get into sex with someone else. Most of the time it was due to the fact that you never actually liked the person you were with or it was the little voice in the back of your head that always told you that they would never be able to get you off the right way which caused you to sometimes become disinterested in the act altogether. But of course this was different, this was Jin. The one person who even without trying had managed to summon reactions out of you unlike any other partner in your life. Surely that was clear in just how wet you were when all that occurred between the two of you was the shedding of clothes and the connecting of mouths. So you most likely shouldn't have been as surprised as you were that you were reacting this way, but it still knocked the air out of you when you felt the first application of his ring finger to your slit.

"What the actual fuck," You gasped quietly, not being able to compute anything as Jin's dangerously long finger sneaked past all guards and was suddenly pushing inside of you. You all but fell forward, hands scrambling for purchase on the wall in front of you that only moments before Jin was pressed up against, now he was on his knees before you, extracting some of the most embarrassingly shameless noises and reactions that you had ever performed in your life, and for god sake, he hadn't even truly started yet.

As if reading your last thought, Jin's impossibly dark eyes flickered up to you, mischief and desire swirling where usually nothing but innocence lived. His lips quirked into a tantalising micro smirk as he assessed your already frazzled expression, "For someone always complaining about sex not ever 'doing' it for them, you sure are a mess. And I've not even started yet."

"Don't be cheeky, asshole." You attempted to sound normal but suddenly there was another finger toying at your entrance and you almost lost your footing, the words turning into a stream of stuttered pants. You had always been a firm believer that penetration did little to nothing for most females as you had never in your life had an orgasm from penetration alone. And yet here Jin was again, proving you wrong as he slid in a second finger, curling it along with its partner and you were already 90% of the way to falling apart. But then again, sex was about 70% a mental game for women so you could only assume that your undying and all but sinful attraction both physically and mentally was contributing heavily to your current state because heavens know you've always been weak for the man whose was knelt between your legs ready to completely destroy you.

The chuckle that started from his chest wound up spreading through your entire body as suddenly the mouth that you were used to only hearing cheesy dad jokes and windscreen wiper laughter from was added to the demolishing of your sanity. You had always had this theory that Jin would be a master at oral and how right you were, a flash of tongue was applied to your plumped clit followed by the full envelopment of the bud by something similar to a silky furnace of wet warmth. You little out a small cry at the sensation that was doubled by the continued assault of moving fingers within you. The lewd noises that filled the room due to your continuously pooling arousal should have been embarrassing but you were too entirely consumed to care. You were also in a state of awe with how Jin was able to pick up on the smallest of cues that your body subconsciously gave, whether it be an intentional clench or a hitch in your panted breathing, he observed it all and continued accordingly which left you gasping for air and a twist to begin to form in your core.

"Why does this feel so good?" You all but whimpered to yourself as you felt your incoming high and continued to grind yourself onto Jin's lips and fingers while his free hand grasped your hip for support, "What kind of sorcery is this?"

Jin was obviously too preoccupied to reply, especially as pleasure was currently skyrocketing through you and both of your movements became more rushed. You had never been particularly vocal during sex sound wise but as quite possibly the most exquisite orgasm of your life came rushing towards you, the moan that left your lips was somewhere in between a cry and a shout as the sensation blossomed from your core throughout your entire body leaving your trembling as Jin coaxed everything from you with skillful strokes and thrusts. Contact was lost as he pulled himself up and reclaimed his footing, a devilishly cocky yet somehow also caring look on his face as he took in your entirely wrecked expression.

"There's nothing better then to see hard work pay off if you know what I mean," He cheekily chortled.

Your breathing was out of control and you were panting as though you had just finished walking up the stairs to your apartment, but you were also even more energised than before with the lingering pulses of pleasure still zapping your senses. You would have returned his arrogant statement if you weren't so busy copying his previous posture while pushing him back up against the wall and making quick work of removing his underwear that you were rather pleased to see had a mark of pre-cum on the front. You were fully ready to reclaim some sort of standing in this situation and what better way to do that then one of your infamously amazing blowjobs? You didn't allow Jin one more moment of pride before you were attaching your lips to the head of his dick. Before this, you had never thought of dicks being well, attractive in any way to be honest, but somehow, like everything else about Jin, his cock was also beautiful and you suddenly were granted the worry that you might actually end up enjoying this more than he.

Though when you glanced upwards to catch a glimpse of his face as you began to slowly take him down your throat thanks to you being blessed with an all but no existent gag reflex, your worries dissipated. It seemed that there was no one in hell that could enjoy anything more then Jin was enjoying himself right now, whimpers, moans and breathy curses were spilling from his lips like honey. When his dick hit the back of your throat he was throwing his head back with a cry and you couldn't help making a  sound of appreciation to the amount of noise he was making because while you weren't vocal you had always preferred more vocal partners. You liked to know when you were wrecking someone and Jin was definitely letting you know with the string of unintelligible sounds and the hand that would grip your hair in a manner that was just rough enough for you to appreciate it everytime you applied a prized amount of pressure or purposeful suck. Your hands reached up to grab at the gym-sculpted ass that you had actually been able to get a few playful jabs at during your friendship but were now allowed to fully appreciate as you used it to helpfully push in the remaining length into your mouth.

To be completely honest, you would have happily stayed on your knees all night long and continue to suck him off because you were having the time of your life seeing the always collected and composed Jin fall apart under your ministrations. But Jin apparently felt selfish and in want of something more as he, rather reluctantly, removed himself from your mouth and pulled you up to your feet.

You pouted as you finished cleaning off your lips with your tongue,"Aw, but I was having so much fun."

"I could tell," He snickered while removing some lasting moisture from the side of your lips before pressing his mouth to yours, his tongue coming into contact with yours granting some of the lingering taste of your past orgasm. "But I don't like I can bounce back as quickly as I'd want to tonight so I'd much rather come with you."

"I guess I can allow that," You drawled which caused something between a scoff and a laugh to sound against your lips. "But if we're going to fuck, I'd much rather do it in one of our rooms as while I'm sure we're capable of fucking against this wall, I personally don't want that back pain in my life. It's also an extremely large amount of effort that I really don't feel like exerting right now."

Jin let out a full-on laugh as he began to follow you in the direction of his room, hand grasping after yours. "You really are efficient in everything aren't you?"

"Always," You stated simply while crawling onto his bed, you noticed that he seemed to be looking around for something and thanks to your amazing brain power you quickly guessed what it was. "You don't need to worry about covering up, by the way, there has to be a reason I have this fucking coil in my arm."

He looked up in surprise, a pink haze coating his cheeks, somehow embarrassed by this rather than when you were both getting each other off. "You sure, I really don't mind."

"What's the point of this thing if not to have some good all fashion, condomless sex. And I know your test results so we're all good." You summed up a matter of factly, before flipping yourself over and wiggling your ass in a way that you hopped was somewhat attractive. "Now stop the yapping, let's get fapping."

"I love it when you talk dirty babe," Jin snarked but came up behind you, the presence of his body enveloping your quickly causing the once light atmosphere to dissolve, especially as he began to grace kisses up your spine to your shoulder where he lightly applied his teeth as he nipped at the skin. "I still can't believe this is happening, like is this actually real right now?"

"Apparently," You sighed in return as he mouthed at your ear, back arching in approval. "And if it's not, we should probably start fucking before one of us wakes up and ruins everything."

Jin hummed in agreement, pressing his lips back to yours as he used his free arm that wasn't propping himself over you to place his tip at your entrance. He stilled for a moment, seemingly gauging your reaction which caused you to roll your eyes behind your closed eyelids and kiss him harder before pushing back your hips so his head slipped inside of you. He pulled back to let out a loud gasp while you panted in satisfaction at the sensation of him finally being inside of you. Despite the fact that you had already come once, you were still tight thanks to the fact that you hadn't had sex in months and you weren't into penetration during masturbation. Jin leaned back on his knees, his moan shaking through your body as you greedily pushed yourself back until your hips were resting against each other.

"Holy fucking shit," He cried out, grabbing at your waist. "Fuck, fuck, fuck you feel so good. What the fuck, how do you feel so good?"

You would have smirked if you weren't so equally wrecked out by the feel of him and you wanted to return the sentiment because how the fuck did he feel so good? Again you were just shocked by the effect Jin had on you and while it could have been counted as daunting you found it thrilling that you finally had found someone who you truly reacted to and from the signs Jin was exhibiting, the feeling was mutual.

With you bent over, chest propped up by your arms, Jin began to finally thrust into you, the position allowing him to fully sheath himself into you. You took everything he gave you with a series of appreciating moans and curses while he continued to be vocal about how 'fucking amazing and unreal this was.' Being the impatient and needy person you were, you met each of his movements half way so that there was never a moment that he was ever fully out of you. That was until a few minutes in a hand was wrapping are your neck in a caress and your body was being pulled upright so that the flush of your back was against his impossibly broad chest. The pressure on your throat wasn't enough to do anything but keep you secure but no choking was needed to take your breath away as he extracted himself entirely from you, only to enter back in with an uncanny amount of force. With this new position of you both on your knees, upright, he was somehow to reach a point in you that you had sometimes begun to doubt the existence of.

"Fuck," You all but shouted at this uncommon sensation, not being able to actually believe your own body. ''Fuck Jin, yes."

"There's that mouth I've been missing," Jin cooed in between pants and soft moans of his own though his volume returned as he thrust back into you and he succumbed to the feeling, "Fuck you were so right about me being stupid for not saying anything sooner, just imagine if we had been doing this, this entire time."

"I don't know how we would have ever have gotten anything done," You stated breathlessly, a groan escaping you as Jin began to move again, your hips subconsciously joining the rhythm. "But fuck this is good."

"It's because we're fucking amazing," Jin said as more of a moan as you clenched down on him, his free hand drifting to your front to find your clit. "Or just amazing at fucking."

"Both," You agreed, spasming slightly as the effect of being fully stimulated took over. "Fuck Jin, I'm already close."

"Oh thank god, so am I." He panted in relief, still thrusting into you without a moment of pause. He did take a moment to adjust the angle of his motions which caused him to brush over that phantom spot again and send you completely reeling and over the edge causing you to slump forward and out of Jin's hold. In search of his own orgasm, he helped to lengthen the effects of your own, pushing himself into you at a sporadic speed. Almost before you could comprehend what was happening, a completely different kind of warmth was filling you as Jin came in you with a cry and his body hunching over your own as he trembled due to the aftershock of his orgasm.

His softening length slipped out of you as he moved so that he was beside you on his bed, both of you too fucked out to even consider moving or speaking for at least a few moments. It was only when your heart rate began to slowly calm and you began to regain your senses did you open your eyes and look for him. He was on his back in a similar state, chest rising and falling at an alarming pace but as if feeling your gaze he turned to look at you, a glowing smile taking over the exhausted and shattered expression on his face.

You couldn't stop the swelling of your heart at the adoring look and returned his grin ten fold as you lazily lifted your hand to brush a piece of fallen chestnut hair from his eyes, "I want to cuddle you so badly right now but we're far too sticky and gross for that right now."

He took your hand into his, bringing it to his mouth where he gently kissed each tip, the most gentle sign of affection either of you had shown so far, "I can't help but agree so I think the only next course of action is to get clean and to get some food so that we can go for round two."

"I thought you said that you didn't think you could bounce back so fast?" You chuckled while you exhorted some of your precious energy to pull yourself up so you could follow after him as he began to make his way in the direction of his bathroom.

He scoffed, slinging a lazy arm around your waist as he walked side by side, "I meant right away. If you think that we're only going once you are mistaken. I still need a proper apology from someone for sending r rated photos to someone else rather than me."

"Hey, you have no right to be mad about that. I had no idea you liked me and I was a bit drunk." You attempted to defend yourself, a small pout taking over your features.

"I can be mad that someone got to see all of this," He grabbed at your ass, "Before me."

"But that's just because you decided to be a moody asshole instead of just saying how you felt!"

Jin seemed to take a moment to regard your words before he was pulling your still naked body against his, "So I guess I have some apologising to do."

There was a stir in you at the expression on his face and the memory of him knelt before you caused you to smirk, "Then I think the only next course of action is for to get straight to apologising."

And just like that, he was dropping down before you in the hallway, hands gripping your thighs as he peered up at you with dark sincerity, "I couldn't agree more."

[destinywhisperslove]

Just a Tumor/Why I Stayed

My darling heart, it’s 6 am and sleep escapes me and I took today off. When everything falls apart, it’s me putting him back together first and figuring out myself later, although he is the one who can mend the final pieces. Yesterday, Turtle was in the shower and I finally got up the courage to look at his phone, heart pounding with hope and fear. It took no less than 30 seconds to see it, to graphically see it, and for a few minutes I was unglued. I had healed so well, been so exuberant on our honeymoon, and he could be there next to me having these conversations. I ran to the bathroom crying, interrupting his shower. In his head, it was already over, but when it struck him, my mind was already made up that I’d stay. I guess my mind was already made up on November 3rd last year. I was extremely surprised that he said “K let’s end this”, because he made me feel that exact “not good enough” tossed aside feeling that had cursed my life. Was he just trying to beat me to saying something I wasn’t even thinking? I really couldn’t handle it and broken down crying and he took it back, if only to stop my crying. He said she was the only one and it was meaningless etc, and I wanted to believe him, but it was hard since he wouldn’t let me see his phone any longer. He shelled, obvs, and closed the door to the game room and I was terrified for a second, since the gun is in there, but he was just sitting there. He told me that he threw his ring in the bushes and I said “They’re just pictures. They hurt my feelings but they didn’t break my heart. I’m not throwing my marriage away over pictures. I’m not throwing it away over anything. It’s just not an option to me.” He didn’t really throw it though. I just sat there with him for a long time in silence, saying little things here and there. My overall feeling was relief, that I finally listened to my inner feeling, that it was out in the open, and that he saw what it did to me. He really doesn’t see sexting as cheating. It really cheapens all those cute little kissy stickers for me too, knowing I’m not the only one. I can’t see them the same. I meanly thought that I should tell him that that means I should start spreading my titties in my inbox and see how he likes it, but that was just jealousy really, along with wanting to cuss the girl out. That part is not completely out of the question still lol. How do women see married men and be just like “oh well” cuz they wanna see a nasty cum pic and get attention? He’s 1000% guilty but just ew. His phone is an escape from reality and responsibility and usually that means games but sometimes it means pretending there’s no ring on your finger, that you are the man you were before one of those random chicks wanted to be your wife. We actually had a pretty nice day. Once he started to see that I really was still there, he gave me a big hug from behind, like he was clinging to me, and he was no longer the cold stranger first confronted. I know he tends to shut down, but dang does that coldness feel like steel. I melted into his arms. It’s funny to me that he immediately wanted to try for a baby. How can you say “let’s get the papers” and “ok time for a baby” within the same hour?? I just didn’t really say anything. Anastasia is so precious to me, and my family has been so broken that words and trust simply aren’t enough. She needs the dang world from you!! The whole freakin thing and not promises you can’t keep. Also summer bdays suck. I want her at our originally planned time. I don’t see how people think kids fix everything. I wouldn’t want to put that pressure on her. We have both felt that pressure and our parents are still messed up after 28 years of us cleaning up their messes. I just feel like our marriage is the best one I know. The first time around, I mostly felt obligated , but being a Nicholson became my identity. I am utterly in love. I feel like turtle understands me and shows me such deep kindness, saying things like “Let’s never fight.” I went in knowing that this cancer could come back again, but really it just felt like a tumor. It definitely left its mark on me, but I’m not afraid. I laid there for a while shaking, feeling like I should just take the phone while he sleeps and rip the bandaid completely off, but in the end, I decided to write while the sun rises on today. I feel better now. It sucks that he still won’t trust me enough to open his phone to me, but I decided it doesn’t matter what else is on there. I just have to trust that the risk is not worth some “old friend” feeling special because you saw her boobs and have cum on your hands. That whatever happiness it gives him to “help” someone is unequal to kicking me square in the chest. I told him to just think of me when he’s tempted to do it, that I’m not so dumb to think two discoveries years apart that were both the ONLY time i look is all there is, since it obviously catches up to him eventually, so just think of how much it hurt to see me in pain. Well really, there’s also the snuck pictures of his coworkers from across the table where you can see down their shirts. And messaging every woman he knows and lying about it. He said Karma is a B, but I think she is also wonderfully kind to the man who is good to his “perfect” wife. I’d NEVER break him live I’ve been broken before. He is so precious to me. If there was the slightest chance that something I do could break him, I just won’t do it. Except maybe writing here of course. It’s my small necessary allowance. It’s not hard for me to shut out all other men. They don’t even exist to me. Maybe that’s a hard thing about being a man, but I hope one day he can only have eyes for me. I always want it, and if it’s cuz I’m at work or on my period, then that’s just lame. I’m always the one waiting til he wants it. I know that’s how it naturally goes, but I do miss the feeling I had when we first started dating, that he couldn’t wait to touch me and feel me. I feel like my feeling hasn’t changed when his have, even if it’s just because he’s tired, and especially cuz he’s not too tired to rub one out for the ladies. I guess you can see there is an edge of bitterness, but I’m all softness to him. I don’t want him to taste bitterness beyond the way it has poisoned him already to see me hurt and disappointed. I don’t jab and turn the knife deeper, but just like last time, I pretty much just have to work through my own feelings on it. It hurts to love sometimes, no matter what the quotes say, but I’m going to keep on doing it. At least I have you to tell and I can be a little barbed without starting the whole thing all over again (which is what happened at midnight, when I asked for reassurance). I haven’t written much in a whole year, but it’s good to see you old friend, and it’s good to feel like truth finds a way.

[wafflelvr]

tinder

i am very proud of my social media presence, it’s how i show people the growth in my dancing, funny relatable anecdotes, my own personal growth, and pictures of me literally killing the game so that everyone knows how hot i’ve become. and i try to appear unapologetic, but i’m an attention grabber what can i say? i love it. i love hearing that people like reading my blog, my tweets, and my instragram posts. i like hearing people say that they feel like they can relate to me and that they think of me as a funny person because i publicly humiliate myself on a daily basis on social media.

however, social media presence aside; i cannot for the life of me get the hang of the dating app Tinder. for those of you in healthy, happy relationships, tinder is an app that lets you view singles in your area that you could be hanging out with through very basic profiles with a max of six pictures, a 500 word bio, and the luck of the swipe. basically, you can choose who you want to have a free meal and movie with, without having the dating algorithm that most dating sites use. tinder is also for hooking up with random strangers because you swiped right when you were a few drinks in. it can be fun when you’re harmlessly flirting and getting compliments like, “wow you have super blue eyes” or “sit on my face”. (really that is one of the first things that some one has sent me… not even a “hey, how is your day?”). but when it comes down to it, when you actually do meet this person in real life and you sit across from them in a coffee shop or restaurant, you realize that you’re sitting across a person who has the words, “looking for someone to adventure with; hugs, drugs, and pugs only,” in their tinder bio. and then you get so disgusted with yourself that you end up ignoring them the whole date and being as passive aggressive as possible to wade off any touching or the impression that you’re really interested in anything other than the free drinks and food you’re getting. it’s a roller coaster really.

all jokes aside, why are we so interested in tinder? is it because we are all secretly narcissists and need the attention of some random guy (or girl) who clearly took hours deciding their images and witty bio? is it because the feelings of loneliness when we are single are literally the worst because when you’re halfway through a nine season tv series and you look at your reflection in the dark screen you realize how upsettingly single you are? or is it because we just want something to make ourselves feel accomplished and appreciated? before you assume that i’m just shitposting and am unhappy about the outcomes of tinder dates gone wrong, i do have some statistics to back me up.

so according to bustle.com; 80% of Tinder users are actually looking for a long- term relationship. so that semi- forgettable looking guy that you for sure swiped left on because he was so plain looking and his bio read, “looking for a real thing, not just a hook-up,” is actually looking for the love of his life. the other 20% of users are looking for a one night stand, or as they put it gently, “not looking for something serious,”. understandable. quick hook-ups are a very real thing, but sometime’s it’s still weird hooking up with some random dude who will probably either get to attached or end up ghosting you right after you hook up. the stigma that Tinder is simply a speed hook-up app is statistically wrong, but it’s still gross when i have to swipe through bio after bio saying, “looking for something causal,” “let’s get high/ drunk and have a good time,”. it’s also concerning when i see “looking for something real on here; if you’re not into this swipe left.” really, the bios are just a block on the guy who i’m looking at.

there are over 90 million people who are currently using Tinder to “improve” their dating life. however, according to mic network inc, 62% of all location based dating apps (in general not even Tinder here) are men. MEN ARE TAKING OVER TINDER LADIES!!! THEY LITERALLY OUTNUMBER US 2 TO 1. the article goes on to say that TInder’s design of swiping is a lot like a cognitive game. and since the human mind (especially them male brain) is reward driven, it explains the new found pleasure of treating future relationships like a game and the competitive nature of swiping. and here we are complaining that the world is full of games and we will never find the loves of our lives because they play too much. and then we swear off men and walk our dogs and drink bone dry cappuccinos and write sassy blog posts about how shitty online dating is. (or is that just me right now?) research has shown that the amount of time men spend on a Tinder session is 7.5 minutes. and women swipe for 8.5 minutes. doesn’t seem that important. but swiping means increasing your chances of matching a person. so while it takes men a shorter time to swipe, they’ll usually like more profiles, increasing their odds of matching and receiving a date, whereas women have 14% chances of swiping a “like” because they don’t go into the reward part of the chase. it is a objective game. the objective being however many people match with you and actually message you. the actual endgame of dates is smaller than matches because by the time your ego is boosted the voice in your head is telling you to move on. so you go back to your 7 or 8 minute long swiping session.

Tinder is the ultimate ego booster. not going to lie, the first time i started using Tinder, i was excited to have the male attention again. it’s fun. getting compliments and being asked what i was majoring in in college and then being told that what i wanted to do was impressive really made me feel like they really valued me. then i would be snapped back to the reality that they were on here messaging other girls the same thing, or sexting them. i had no idea who this guy really was or what he wanted or if he really was interested in me as a person or just as a random hookup. whenever i raised questions about this to my friends they would gently respond, “it’s a hook-up app; they want one thing”. which is honestly true. everyone likes attention, everyone wants to feel special and appreciated. even the douchiest frat boy will agree with me here; when an attractive person tells you that you’re attractive and smart and funny and try to get to know you, it feels really good. and then you walk around thinking you’re the shit.

but really, it’s part of the game. you say things to get a reaction and to get the thing you want, whether it’s a date or a hook-up. it’s all a game. and that’s really disappointing.

i’m a romantic. i like the whole learning about another person and creating a relationship with them at the rate that we are comfortable exploring at. i like the mystery of learning whether or not they like chocolate, their favorite movies, their music taste, and why they are choosing to do what they’re majoring in. i enjoy being the one person that is discovering this. i enjoy being in a relationship based off a growing liking of each other. it’s easier that way and i think that it’s more encouraging to fall in love and have a heathy relationship. also, i like feeling special. i like having the attention on me, feeling like i am the only person that they are focused on in that moment. which is why i suck at dating.

tinder defeats the romance of learning about a person to learn. the conversations go from casual to sexually driven in five minutes or the plans of a date are rushed because both people are literally so starved of actually attention they’ll graph at anything. it’s all a a game. and it’s why i suck at dating. i can’t change the conversation from “what’s your favorite coffee ground?” to something really disgusting. it’s too fast for me! i can’t keep up!

so now that i’m done slamming tinder; i’ll explain the reason behind this post so that my friends who do use tinder don’t get mad at me and tell me i’m just upset because my matches suck and i go into the dates wanting something magical to happen. (i love romance people, i spend my days watching more rom coms than i do doing anything productive).

this post was to deglorifiy the app. it’s actually miserable. you’re more single than ever, or you’re greasy if you’re going on tinder to find a side dish when you’re in a relationship (like you have a person, appreciate them regardless if they’re giving you sex. have the decency to treat them like you love them OR just break up with them so that you’re not hurting a person who loves you because you’re too selfish to appreciate what they have given you). you’ve stooped to the level of “i need an ego boost because i can’t give it to myself”. i say, fuck that. go look in the mirror. you’re hot as hell. you are smart as hell. you are deserving of so much more than some person on tinder telling you you’re hot because they want to get a butt picture or have a hook-up. yeah, being single sucks and you feel wildly pathetic when you have to reconfigure your life because you’re so used to being in a relationship. but is having a tinder really going to make it seem like you’ve moved on? is it going to make them want you back? probably not. it’ll feel good those first few swipes. every swipe will feel like a middle finger to your ex, but after about 8 minutes of swiping you’ll realize how boring this is because you’re really only swiping left and you become even more disgusted with yourself and your list of bachelors. it’s an exhausting cycle.

my advice; delete the app. it’s a game for many of the millennials that use it, and you deserve better than a game. delete the app and read the book you really wanted to read. or start the show that has been sitting in your queue for weeks. learn a different language. go to the movies by yourself and treat yourself to some popcorn and snacks. go hang out with friends and work on their friendships. you’ll forget about the app and that you’re single. in fact, that’s the best way to make it seem like you’ve moved on. move on with grace, but also with some great self- worth. you deserve so much more than a swipe because you slaved for hours to get that beautiful selfie. you deserve so much more than some guy who is solely in the app for the ego boost. but also if this is your thing and you feel great, keep the app. i applaud you for your perseverance and strength to deal with the occasionally greasy assholes whose opening line is “wanna sit on my face and get high?”. i really applaud you for that. you’re doing amazing either way sweetie. 

[rap-monstuh]

Things I Want to Say/Ask You

1. Are you truly okay with Riley?? You wouldn’t care of I know that he’s into me and I’m just hanging with just him and smoking? Would you really be okay?

2. He didn’t say ‘will you ride me’ he said ‘when you ride me’. He’s someone I was kind of Wirth when I was in Korea. And it would have gotten serious if it wasn’t for these problems in order of importance. 1. His personality. It could easily make me angry or upset. Not the best for me,but it wasn’t terrible. Plus he bought me stuff like food all the time to show his affection. But that was the only way he shows his true affection 2. His age. Usually don’t give a shit but see below as to why I did this time. 3. His goals. He was at a way different point in his life. One where he felt stable and so wanted to get married and have kids as soon as possible especially since he felt he was getting older. Not what I wanted. But I know he’s lonely (like you) and so I still talk to him once in a while even though he had been a pervy jerk when texting me recently.

3. Now here, I really don’t go spying on your phone bit when I went to look at it I see that the numbers of notifications change on your dating apps that you still have on your phone. So being a bit curious I checked one and realized you had started a conversation with a girl that day… I even toldyou i checked it though. Anyways kind of sad. So when I ask you about if you’re searching for girls you say friends maybe yet you’re searching specifically girls? And on dating apps??? I know you’re lonely with almost only me…. but they’re dating apps.

4. When you went to sleep in another room so that I can keep watching videos and stay awake, you left your phone, unlocked, in my room. So just to be cheesy and funny I sent a pic that I liked from my phone to your phone and saved it. I went to go change your backgrounds on your phone to that picture and I see your most recent pictures when choosing a picture….. you forgot to delete your dick pics. And also another picture that seems like it was supposed to be flirtatious. So pretty much looks like you have been sexting other girls. Which get into more later.

5. Last time we actually really talked about how I feel… with the lack of affection and sex you basically said you didn’t want to confuse me since he doesn’t feel right to have a girlfriend right now so you didn’t want to have sex with me. How you’re holding yourself back because you haven’t had sex since you went to Thailand either. Which was like okay but we haven’t had sex for almost a month by the time you were leaving for thailand. So, okay you hooked up with a girl I want to say in Thailand? Okay. Whatever can’t say anything cause I’m not your girlfriend.

6. So we spend most of our days with each other, you always want to hold my hand or have me hold onto your arm, you want at least a kiss goodbye whenever I leave, you always want me to spend the night, and we always have to have time to cuddle. But you don’t want to have sex to not confuse me? You should know that it wouldn’t confuse me because you told me you don’t want a girlfriend and I still do all this stuff and more with you and for you. And I’m supposed to fill all these roles except for a sexual one? That one will be filled by some other girls is what it looks like. Which is dumb cause it makes me feel not good about myself and sick eith myself and I’m tired of feeling that way without your help so I don’t need your help in feeling that way in general. You know what you’re right. You didn’t want to confuse me, but congrats you have.

7. For a while my thought on your place in my life was to help and watch you grow into a more stable place in life and better person while I wait for a day when you feel more comfortable with the idea of a girlfriend. Seeing how much time I spend with you, how much I have invested into you. That was when I felt that I had meant something a bit similar in your life. But now, I don’t know what I’m meant to be and I keep thinking I’m nothing more than a distraction from how your life is now. Some kind of comforting distraction. The wanting and willing to wait and invest more into you always dwindles just a tiny bit when I think of all of this. Especially if these thoughts come up when were laying in bed together and cuddling and you calling the dumb but kind of cute nickname of “boocicles”.

8. Your apartment feels like home to you and that’s great and everything so my opinion doesn’t matter when I say if you take out the fact that you have stuff on that tiny kitchen nook and the fridge is stocked, your apartment looks like a drug house they would show in a documentary on TV. There’s barely ANY furniture and it’s just scattered in random places. The living room just has your office stiff like your printer and cords just lying on the ground with a piano keyboard just sitting randomly in the room. A tiny tiny tiny side table is just up against the back wall with nothing else. And the places you have to sit is your office chair and a really old and rusted up fold up chair that was probably a nicer fold up chair at one point but is now looking kind of..mm gross just leaning against another random wall. Was worse when you didn’t have a mattress and was just sleeping on the ground in a sleeping bag, but still didn’t help much when you got one cause it’s just lying randomly in the room on the floor. Clothes are just thrown into the closet with only a couple things actually hanging up. The bathroom is not too bad in the fact that it looks like a person actually uses it, but it’s so cluttered and messy. Also should think if getting a trashcan with a lid because if you don’t remember to throw your trash away like you did yesterday your place smells. So again, home to you. But if you plan on bringing girls over to have sex with them that isn’t used to your style of what is home to you then I suggest you organize and make it look less like a hangout for hardcore druggies and drug makers. It might help your chances of getting laid.

[skiasurveys]

1. What’s your favorite position and why? I like doggy style, or like even flat doggy, it feels nice and rougher, and I also enjoy missionary even tho thats boring.

2. How did you lose your virginity? If you’re still a virgin, is there any specific reason? how? uh he put his dick in me

3. If you could have sex with any porn star or model, who would it be? n/a

4. What’s one thing in particular that makes you want to tear off your lover’s clothes? i dont know. him kissing my neck and teasing me

5. Five turn ons.

neck kissing

strong arms

when connor touches my thighs

dirty talk

connor

6. Five turn offs.

choking

hurting me

being very rough with me

smell

being quiet 

7. Have you had any embarrassing sexual experiences? one time we were banging and during I had gotten my period..yeah. awkward.

8. Do you have a fetish? not really

9. Have you experimented with anyone of the same sex? no

10. What’s “out of bounds” for you during sex? choking me 

11. What’s the best sexual unsolicited advice you can give? Make sure youre ready and tell them what YOU like.

12. Hickies - get ‘em or give ‘em? both

13. Do you like giving head? yeah

14. Do you like getting head? yea

15. What’s one thing you look for in a partner? humor 

16. How many partners have you had? 1.

17. What’s your sexual orientation? straight 

18. If you’re bi/pansexual, what gender do you tend to prefer? N/A

19. Describe the best sex you’ve ever had.

we were at his house and we were having sex but he was being so sensual and stuff, and he like looked at me and was like I love you and it was just rly nice

20. Describe the worst sex you’ve ever had. the only bad times are when he cums rly quick lOL

21. Have you ever had a funny sexual experience? What was it? not rly

22. Are you okay with rough sex? depends on how rough

23. How big was the biggest dick you’ve ever seen? Was it in a porn or in real life? theres a lot of big dicks

24. Boobs or ass - which is better? asss

25. Do you prefer sex or masturbation? Sex.

26. Describe how you usually masturbate. i dont anymore

27. Do you like tattoos on a partner or do you like them to have a clean slate, skin wise? both

28. How do you feel about daddy dom/little girl roleplaying? its hot 

29. What’s your fantasy? pay for my college 

30. Do you have any sexual regrets? Nope.

31. When did you last have sex? Last week.

32. When did you last masturbate? idk.

33. Have you had anal? yeah, HUrtful.

34. Do you like to spank/be spanked? yah

35. What do you want done to you right now? i just want to cuddle him and kiss him thats it

36. Are you comfortable with getting tied up? no

37. Did you have sex in high school? no

38. How old were you when you lost your virginity? How long has it been? 19 years old. its been like a year 

39. Do you like teasing or would you rather get straight to the point? teasing

40. Sexting or phone sex? Sexting.

41. Have you had sex in any interesting places? behind our friends couch 

42. Are you sexually active? Yes.

43. Have you had car sex? UGH I WISH.

44. Have you ever had sex with anyone else in the location you were at? (i.e., while your sister was in the other room) yeah

45. Why aren’t you fucking anyone right now? he had to move right now :(

46. Are you able to have emotionless sex? I’m sure I could.

47. Does penis size really matter? yeah 

48. What has been your most memorable experience sexually? i have a lot 

49. If male, are you well endowed? N/A.

50. If female, what’s your breast size? 34B.

51. Have you ever been the other person? No

52. Have you ever cheated on anyone? no

53. Describe an orgasm. everyones is different. i dont know how to explain just  alot of emotions 

54. What’s the longest time you’ve had sex for? hour

55. What’s the shortest time you’ve had sex for? 

like 2 mins

56. If you could change the person you lost your virginity to, would you? Nope.

57. Have you had any pregnancy scares? Yes, but they were just scares, luckily. <- same

58. Are you comfortable naked? Not really.

59. Are you comfortable sending pictures of yourself to others? yeah

60. What’s your sexual comfort zone like? depends

61. What’s something sexual that you thought you wouldn’t like, but ended up liking? spanking 

62. Do you have any piercings in fun places? (i.e., clit, nipples, dick) Nope.

63. Would you say you’re good in bed? i hope so

64. How do you get sex tips? friends

65. Have you ever had sex with anyone while they were on their period? Have you ever had sex while on your period? check previous answers

66. If you could be the other sex for a day, would you and what would you do first? id get hard to see what its like 

67. What’s your favorite part about being the gender you are? how easy i get it with sex lol

68. Slow but passionate, or fast, furious, and kinky? It depends what I’m in the mood for.

69. Have you ever 69’d? Did you enjoy it? yeah

70. Have you ever done drugs and then had sex? no

71. Have you ever had sex with someone you’re in love with? yes

72. How are you with BDSM? Would you ever engage in it? NO

73. Do you like gagging on cock/having someone gag on your cock? Why? yeah its fucking hot 

74. When it comes to oral, are you gentle? Do you use your hands too? 

Yes and yes.

75. Okay, how do you feel about handjobs? connor likes them but i rather suck him 

76. Have you had any unwanted pain during sex? yep

77. What is something that’s not sexual that can turn you on more than anything sexual? facial hair

78. Can your sexual partners be categorized by their zodiac signs? No.

79. Have you had sex to music? What’s your favorite sex song?

wish you were here- Pink floyd

80. What’s something you want to try in bed? idk

81. Has anyone drew blood from you during sex, whether it was by cutting, biting, or scratching? How did you feel about that? Nope.

82. Have you ever fucked someone who was sad? Did it help them emotionally or make it worse? yeah and it helps me 

83. Do you like sexual anons? Sometimes.

84. What’s your ideal round of sex? just let me cum 

85. Do you like the use of whipped cream, handcuffs, chocolate, and cherries? I’ve never done that…

86. Have you ever been walked in on or caught? Nope.

87. Have you ever had sex in public? Would you? I haven’t but I might.

88. What’s a good sex joke? I don’t think I know any.

89. Do you like to be called a dirty slut or would you rather be treated like royalty? both 

90. Are you more submissive or dominant? Submissive.

91. What’s your naughtiest secret? i cant tell 

92. What’s the weirdest thing you’ve encountered sexually? I don’t think anything.

93. Have you ever “stuck your dick in crazy”? Was there a lesson learned? wat

94. Do you like playing with balls/having someone play with yours?

Sure.

95. What’s the best nonsexual feeling? Love.

96. Do you like feet? no

97. Do you look at rule 34/hentai? no

98. Pick a random question off this survey for yourself. i did all 

99. Who’s your ideal sexual partner? connor.

100. Do you have a partner right now? Would you like one? yes i have one 

101. Are you accepting “applications” for a partner? Nope.

[0n-y0ur-left]

@machine-dove sent me a message yelling about my tags on this post and said I had to write the ficlet.

I’m always a slut for prompts, so...

The thing was, Steve would swear in the years that followed, he really felt like him and Bucky had been dancing around this for months.  They’d been best friends for years, for as far back as either of them could remember, but after the weirdness that had been middle school there’d been a charge there, a spark of something humming beneath the surface of their interactions that both excited and scared the hell out of them.  

Or out of Steve, anyway.  He’d finally gotten the nerve to admit - to himself and his friends and loved ones - that he had a thing for both girls and guys at the start of eleventh grade, and while he didn’t have dates of either sex lining up to ask him out, it had at least cleared the air between him and Bucky.  And when Buck had broken up with his last girl of the month, four months ago (not that Steve was keeping track), and they’d started constantly hanging out together again, like old times… well, there was a nasty little voice in Steve’s head that couldn’t help reading more into it.

Especially when Bucky insisted sharing milk shakes when they went out after school, or popcorn when they went to the movies, or letting Steve borrow his Varsity jacket when he accidentally/on purpose forgot to bring his own coat to the Homecoming game they’d gone stag to.  There was definitely something there, something more than Steve had ever dreamed of hoping for - but while one mean side of him liked to point out the possibility of his best friend becoming something even more, the other, meaner side always shut him down: making sure to remind Steve as harshly as possible just how delusional he was being.

Because Bucky, even if he was single, had never once expressed an interest in being with other guys.  And even if he had, Buck was so far out of Steve’s league that it wasn’t funny.  He was smart - honor council this year, top of their class since he’d first transferred to Brooklyn in elementary school - he was on student council, starting pitcher for the varsity baseball team as  a sophomore, a key player in every drama production Washington High had put on since he’d started there.  People were tripping over the opportunity to hang out with Bucky Barnes, never mind the chance to date him.  And Steve… Steve was just Steve.  Scrawny asthmatic with a chip on his shoulder, painfully average student and GSA representative.  He was a decent artist when people took the time to actually look at his work, and Bucky swore up and down that he was funny as hell, but for the most part Steve knew that the only reason he wasn’t regularly getting shoved in lockers anymore was because he was most famous for being Bucky Barnes’ best friend.

Steve was an idiot for even imagining that he had a chance with someone as perfect as Bucky, but he wasn’t so stupid that he’d go and risk something as important as their friendship by asking him out.

Besides, they hung out so often that Steve felt he could pretty safely pretend they were dating.  In the deepest, darkest corners of his mind.  And if ninety-nine percent of his schmoopy fan art of late was based on an AU of Clark Kent and Bruce Wayne as dorky high school boyfriends that maybe bore a little bit of a resemblance to the dumb shit that the two of them did together?  Well… no one needed to know.

It got more hits to his blog, at least.

That said, there were still nights when Steve’s stupid brain couldn’t help but wish.  So when Bucky had sent his text on the Sunday before the MLK Holiday, when Steve was already pouting about the fact that he couldn’t join him in their volunteer plans because his stupid head had decided to come down with a stupid cold, well… Steve couldn’t help feeling a little reckless.

Text from Bucky Received 09:32 PM

What do you wear to bed?

Steve had been staring at it for a solid thirty seconds, blinking and trying to convince himself that it really wasn’t the Nyquil that he’d taken earlier - that Bucky really was asking him that question.

He had to know how suggestive it was.  Steve had watched Bucky charm girls since they were in elementary school… he knew how to flirt, he knew how people took his words.  Which meant - he had to be flirting with Steve.  It wasn’t completely out of the blue, not really, but it still left Steve such a squirmy mess that he actually had to abandon his tablet on his desk and fall back onto his mattress to read it again.

Bucky had stayed over enough times over the years to know damned well that Steve usually just slept in whatever outsized summer camp t-shirt was cleanest in his drawer and either a pair of old boxers or ratty pajama pants; but he couldn’t very well say that.  Not in response to his first sext.

He bit the hell out of his lip, dismissing the thought as fast as he could, before  finally forcing his fingers to type out an answer.  

Text to Bucky Sent 9:34 PM

depends on the weather

if its summer just a black jock or smth ;)

He held his breath as the ellipses bubble appeared on Bucky’s side of the screen, rereading his response obsessively.  Best case scenario: Bucky really was flirting with him, and they could get it out of their systems the easy way… break the ice on a text screen, then make out like fiends in person the next time they hung out together.  Worst case scenario: Bucky would ask him what the fuck he was talking about and Steve would laugh it off as a joke.

He was golden.

He was really, really fucking hoping for the former - although as Bucky continued typing he couldn’t help but start panicking.

Text from Bucky Received 9:35 PM

k but what about like in the winter

do u wear warm pajamas?

What the fuck?

Steve actually started to type as much, but the rest of Bucky’s responses came in a flurry of messages.

Text from Bucky Received 9:35 PM

my mom is making me throw out my old superman pajamas and i kno theyre about ur size

i swear theyre not gross or anything

ill wash them before

if u want them

i just know u like superman and its dumb to throw them away

Steve finished reading the texts, dropped the phone onto his comforter, and covered his face in his hands because - oh God.  It was so painfully cute, so painfully Buck that he couldn’t help giggling, and immediately picked the phone back up to read the exchange again.

Before he could talk himself out of it, he took a screenshot and hit the share icon for his Tumblr account.  After a second’s debate he added the hashtag #Ur fav would NEVEr #This boy and posted it.

He rolled onto his side, staring at the screenshot and grinning like a crazy person… and then succumbed to the cold meds, finally.

Steve woke up coughing a short while later, blinking in confusion before realizing that he’d definitely fell asleep on top of his covers, with his damned contacts still in.  He reluctantly moved to the bathroom to pop them out (his eyes were already a sticky, awful mess, so leaving them in absolutely wasn’t worth how he’d feel in the morning), then stumbled back to his bed, groaning when he noticed the time on his alarm clock.

He face-planted back into his pillow, only to bash his nose against the cold, hard surface of his phone.  With a curse he moved the damned thing to his nightstand - then remembered how he’d fell asleep in the first place.  He knocked three books on the floor feeling for his glasses on the nightstand, but finally got them on his nose and pulled his phone screen close to his face, blinking in surprise when he saw his Tumblr app notifications.

With a little red bubble that read 1,000+ next to it.

Steve opened the app with shaking fingers, only to laugh out loud when he realized which post it was that had blown up.  He hadn’t imagined the interchange with Bucky, and apparently the entire damned internet was every bit as charmed as he’d felt.  A quick scroll through his inbox confirmed that at least fifty people thought they should get married.

Which… was probably jumping the gun, but was something that Steve couldn’t help preening over, just a little.

Text to Bucky sent 06:03 AM

I PUT THIS CONVO ON THE INTERNET

If nothing else, Buck would get a good laugh out of it in the morning, Steve figured with a giggle.

A giggle that stopped as soon as the blue check mark appeared next to Bucky’s name.

Text from Bucky received 06:03 AM

hmmmmm?

Steve - had definitely not expected Buck to be up yet, but he could hardly abandon the conversation now.

Text to Bucky sent 06:04 AM

I put this on tumblr.  U should see the responses!

It vaguely occurred to Steve that he probably should have asked for permission ahead of time, but it was Bucky.  And it wasn’t as if he’d said anything terrible - if anything, Steve came out looking like the pervy idiot.

Besides, none of their classmates would guess that this random Bucky on the internet was their Bucky: no one outside of their immediate friend group knew that Buck was such a dork, or would believe it in the first place.

Text from Bucky received 06:04 AM

is that ur art site?

Steve hid his grin behind his hand.  His art site.  Please…

Text to Bucky sent 06:04 AM

yeah sort of.  i post on it sometimes

it got huge responses!

more than any drawings :P

PS how old r these pjs?  if they r gonna fit me? XD

Text from Bucky received 06:04 AM

shit

Steve’s heart sank in his chest as the ellipse button appeared immediately under Bucky’s response.  He was in the middle of stumbling out of bed to retrieve his laptop to delete the damned thing when his phone chimed again.

Text from Bucky received 06:05 AM

i lied to millions of ppl on the internet

my mom isnt making me throw my pajamas out

i saw them at target

Steve was about to laugh and make a snarky reply about the ‘millions’ part (he had a grand total of five hundred twenty-three people following his crappy fan art blog, but Bucky always was one for dramatics) but the rest of Bucky’s rant stopped him cold.

Text from Bucky received 06:05 AM

they were on sale tho

i know we already did xmas presents

they just made me think of u

Steve’s smile was so wide his face ached.  The ellipses kept coming.

Text from Bucky received 06:06 AM

no they werent

they werent on sale

thats another lie

sorry tumbler

can they see this now???

Steve was dying.  Bucky was going to actually kill him with adorableness, and he didn’t even seem to realize it.  After smothering a squeal in his pillow Steve got his shit together and started typing back.

Text to Bucky sent 06:06AM

nope! no worries ;)

He gnawed viciously on his bottom lip as he typed up his follow up, started to delete it twice, then finally manned up and hit send.  

Steve was a lot of things, but he sure as hell hoped he wouldn’t ever be called a coward.

Text to Bucky sent 06:07 AM

i got about 50 message overnight tho

they all say i’ve gotta marry you XD

The emoticon, Steve decided when he saw the blue checkmark beneath it, was a nice touch.  If Buck freaked out now, he could just laugh the whole thing off as a joke.

(he wasn’t laughing while the ellipse bubble flashed next to Bucky’s name ten billion times in the next two minutes)

Text from Bucky sent 06:08 AM

we should prob start with coffee first

if ur feeling better i can pick u up tuesday?

is seven okay?

Steve stared at his phone for a solid thirty seconds, gaping in shock, before pressing the call button next to Bucky’s name with shaking fingers.  Seven was perfect, but he could hardly trust himself to type as much.