#while ody is clinging and begging for her

[sailor-sunshine]

"Let me take the suffering from you"

been super obsessed with hades 2 and epic the musical so i really wanted to draw something. planning on re-reading the odyessy bc the last time i read it was like freshman year of highschool. but like epic got me super back into mythology shit again fjahkdha.

this had me struggling but im happy i finished it

[epicsfanshitposting]

Quick thing

Talkin about Odysseus ghosts

Why? Cause I'm an introverted English lit student who likes making people suffer alongside me.

Anyways enjoy.

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Polities is blue. Blue like tears running down face and hands, blue like the condensation on a cold glass of water, blue like the tinge of the lotus flowers, blue like Telemachus eyes, blue like Athena's quick thought space. Polities is close, always close, always asking asking asking to be heard, to be listened too. To be learned from. To be remembered and cherished and responded too. Polities is falling apart, fading, little by little as he is forgotten bit by excruciating bit. He is never cared for, never responded too, never listened too. Polities is the siren call, begging, begging with a blood-flecked voice driven dry by his singing and the lotus flowers, to listen hear learn but Ody never does, never listens never learns never remembers. Polities is the unhealed heart, the unheard cry for help, the hidden grief. He is the flowers wilting on the grave, still beautiful and filled wits message and a promise, but ignored and forgotten all the same. Because he always is, isnt he? He's never been heard and never will be. Not in his story.

Eurylochus is orange. Orange like diluted blood, orange like the sunset, orange like the rusted blade. Eurylochus is quick to follow, quick to lead, quick to forget the consequences, quick to lay the blame, quick to draw the first blood. Yet he is also hesitant, paranoid, planning ahead and ahead into the future, slow to act up, slow to accept defeat. Eurylochus is clinging, doubting, always doubting, clinging like syrup the colour of blood and sunsets. Eurylochus is the rusty blade, never learning, never advancing, always holding onto the past. Eurylochus is the man driven insane by the things they have seen, unable to recover, unable to move on, unable to see the present day. Eurylochus is trapped by his own brain, syrupy-slow and stick and soft.

Anastayx is purple. Purple like royalty, purple like lotus flowers, purple like wine, purple like blood-stained seas. Anastayx is silent and still, frozen in time, in the limbo between laughter and mourning, joy and sorrow, forgiveness and revenge. Anastayx has no voice, no song, because he never had the opportunity to make one before his life was ended on the whim of a distant god. Anastayx is falling, ever falling, falling from grace, from memory, life slipping through his fingers faster and faster as his eyes say everything that needs to be said. Anastayx is the silent heartbreak, the unfinished story, the broken pieces left to collect dust but silently accusing that you did this. You left me. You ended my story before it could begin. It's. Your. Fault.

Anticlea is green. Green like tropical plants, green like the loyal protective snake, green like the life she lived to the fullest. Anticlea is slow, methodical, a mother teaching her stubborn, reckless child, slowly rocking him, trying to bring comfort. Anticlea is the vine that wraps around a tree, whispering to it tales of the heroes of old, bringing beauty for a short while before decaying slowly, softly, flowers falling petal by petal onto the forest floor, soon gone and forgotten as the tree grows older and unrecognisable before her invisible eyes and hands. Anticlea is the silent bystander, voice and memory lost to time as she stands in the background, a husk of a memory, a silent plea.

[aikya-kat-44]

"You didn't stop when I begged you" being in the same rhythm as Calypso's music I can't 😭

Calypso never once stopped to consider Ody's feelings and perspective. She did not listen to Ody and stop trying to assault/harass him even when he made it explicitly clear that he was a) NOT INTERESTED and b) has a wife and son waiting for him at home which btw he would really like to get back to.

(tw: discussions of sa/abuse)

I think she does sa or at the very least harass Ody in epic. While hold them down is very, very explicitly sa, love in paradise is more subtle and manipulative. It's repeatedly iterated that she's what he wants there. She says that they will 'spend their time' in bed despite Ody having clearly mentioned that he has a wife and that he's not her man. When he tries to more assertively reject her, she responds with a veiled threat of her godliness and therefore the power she holds over him.

Not sorry for loving you, in my opinion, is a very accurate depiction of abusive relationships when the abuser 'apologises'. She is quite clearly guilty tripping Odysseus, justifying her actions with her own pain, pretending to apologise, but ultimately stating that she is in the right, and she has no reason to be sorry. To manipulate him into staying. I interpret Ody's 'but not in the way that you want me to' lie as stemming from fear of Calypso (he's spent the last 7 years forced to obey him on an island she fully contols) or the major guilt tripping and emotional manipulation Calypso's been doing.

This isn't to say that calypso doesn't have reasons, or that she isn't sympathetic. She is. She was trapped on an island all alone through no fault of her own for most of her life. It's only natural for her to cling on to the only companion she has. But that doesn't excuse her actions. A major theme of epic is that villains are shaped by their situations, not that their actions are justified. Whilst Odysseus may have done what he did because of his desperation to get home, it does not excuse his actions. The same can be said for Calypso.

Note: I am not taking into consideration the original source material. In the odyssey calypso quite explicitly rapes Odysseus. They are described as an "unwilling lover beside lover all too willing". This post is unrelated to the original Odyssey and relevant only to epic.

[mer-acle]

Ahhhh I need to catch you up on some alisha lore.

Okay some trigger warnings for now but I'll add more later: child abondonment, heavy depression

So we are still at the quest™️. Alisha failed and ofc there is consequences- like she went directly against athena's words. Ofc she's mad. (Also one thing Athena wasnt watching the quest very closely but she had been keeping tabs on her and looking through her memories. So she doesnt know the whole stuff either but it doesnt matter to her anyway alisha failed to listen to her and she failed her test. She isnt good enough for whatever mark of athena is. (She is checking so she doesnt keep sending her children to their death. Also I really need to read mark of athena wtf happens in that book))

Athena says Alisha failed and she isnt good enough. She isnt worthy of being her warrior. And alisha (poor girl. On her last strand.) says but I got the item. I won. (I feel like this is when you get the question right in maths but the teacher doesnt give you any point bc you didnt do it their way. But ten times worse.)

"No alisha. You failed. You failed to listened to me and you failed at keeping yourself safe. You would have been dead if you werent lucky."

"I can fix this I swear. I'll-" alisha hiccups. "swear I can. I'll-"

"No." Athena interrupts her. "You failed. No child of mine fails. You arent fit to be a warrior of mine."

"Mom please- I'll- I'll never stray from your word again, please" Alisha sobs out

"Enough." Athena says, ignoring her daughters cries. "This is final, I don't want another word from you."

With that, she starts to walk away but the girl clings to her feet, wailing uncontrollably, begging for her to stay.

The goddess of war frees her feet from the girl. She starts walking away, not even glimpsing back at her daugher sobbing on the floor, begging for her to stay, covered in her own blood and monster dust.

"No mom please don't go no please please mom I'll do whatever you want please dont leave me. No mom please please stay mom!!" Alisha continues wailing at her, screaming the words until her throat becomes raw. She doesnt even register Athena’s already long gone, she keeps crying and crying and begging and begging until she cant no more.

HELP WHILE I WAS WRITING THESE ODY WOULDNT SHUT UP SCREAMING ATHENA'S NAME. LIKE LOVE IN PARADISE. PLS ODY YOU ARE MAKING THIS EVEN HARDER ON ME.

Anyway athena abondons her ass. To her this isnt that big of a deal. She wont even remember it. But this shaped alisha's life. (Sth sth you saying to your parents oh X thing you did was pretty traumatizing and them not even remembering bc it was just a normal tuesday for them sth sth)

Wanna hear about sth worse. After her breakdown is over Alisha has no choice but pick up the pieces herself and pull herself together as best as she can. Something inside of her is broken now. Its only a matter of time. But she pulls herself together bc she's gotta go back to camp, she's gotta see luke, annabeth. Thalia's tree. She's gotta convince camp everythings okay, better than okay, it is time for celebrations. Their hero has just came back victorious. So she has to pull herself together and put one last grand act. Convince them everythings okay. Its fine. Its fine. Maybe athena didnt mean it. Maybe with enough sacrifices, she'll forgive her. She has no reason worrying anyone.

She puts this mask on, stronger than ever, happier than ever. Even though she has never felt weaker, never felt worse.

Nobody sees through it but luke and annabeth. (And laurie but that is for later) They see it in the way her smile feels a little too tense, how it almost doesnt reach her eyes. They see it in the way she stares at the fire after sacrifing her food. Annabeth sees it in the way she starts eating less and less, sacrificing all she can to her mother instead. Luke sees it in the way she flinches when anyone touches her back, gets close to it even. Luke sees it in the way her moves get sluggish when they swordfight. Luke sees it in the way she stares at the water when she thinks she is alone. Annabeth sees it in the way she starts sleeping less and less. Annabeth sees it in how she tears herself down everyday by overworking. They see it in how she goes to thalia's tree even more. They can see it in her eyes. But what can annabeth do? She is just 10 years old. What can luke do what alisha wont even let him ask what happened? How can they help her when she refuses that she needs it?

Luke hears the warning bells when alisha slowly starts to try to get him used to the idea he'd be the one to take care of annabeth. Alone.

Oh wow I really need to go to bed. Its five am. Sorry. Anyway. Uh. The rest is the saddest scene I wrote to this day. It still hurts. Big trigger warning suicide attempt :(((

That is the worst of it I promise after that scene it will start to get better. Its nothing graphic either, mostly an outline.(Also you absolutely dont have to read it. Please take care)

Poor alisha my baby. I feel so bad but the angsttt

IMMA FUCKIGN THROW HANDS WITH THE GODDESS ISTG

THAT'S SO MUCH WORSE THAN MY GOODBYE AT LEAST ODY YELLED BACK AND DIDN'T LITERALLY BEG HER IN TEARS TO STAY

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH

WHY TF DO YOU HAVE KIDS IF THIS IS HOW YOU TREAT THEM? AT LEAST EPIC ATHENA BECAME FRIENDS ACCIDENTALLY SHE NEVER PLANNED TO

I AM LIVID

Why do parents do this istg so many people just shouldn't have kids but no they just take the little beings and fuck them up and act like it's not on them

If this was a god thing I'd be less mad but it's not

This happens and I hate it

FUUUUUUUCK

Poor Alisha

She does need that other timeline I fear this one is fucked

Oh gosh the poor baby

No I need the rest of the scene now actually. I'm a little worried nobody will intervene and she'll be alone even then but ahhh I still need to know I fear. (Dw i am very much writing scenes like this too, I'd add the topic to FtbL as well, I've been wanting to, but I don't want to add the tag atp when people have gotten invested so we're keeping it out of it. Has Marielle a scene like this tho? Naturally. Very unsurprising)

Screaming into the void.