#which was not an issue i've ever had before

[ponyregrets]

I wanted to write about Buck and Eddie going in the ocean and I'd written most of it before I thought to check what the weather in LA is actually like right now (look, I'm in New England, I just think of it as Warm down there, okay?) and I decided to go with it anyway. as @frightfullytreeish said, get chilly, idiots

(806 coda, 1900 words, also on AO3)

"Hey, what brings you joy?"

Eddie is expecting some waffling in Buck's response. Maybe some suspicion. It's a weird thing to ask, obviously. Joy isn't a word he uses much, isn't a go-to. But even if what makes you happy is a more normal question, it's not right. He needs something deeper.

And of course there's the Tommy of it all. Buck hasn't exactly been mourning or anything, but he's obviously down. It wouldn't be unreasonable for him to say that nothing is bringing him joy at the moment. It's not a particularly joyful time.

But Buck doesn't hesitate, doesn't question. He just says, "The ocean," and doesn't even ask why Eddie wants to know.

"Really?"

"Yeah. I never saw it until I left Hershey. We never went to the beach or anything when I was a kid. The first time I saw it, I fell in love. It was the best thing I'd ever seen."

"I didn't know that."

Buck shrugs. "Doesn't come up that much. And I guess I always think I'll get used to it? But it's amazing every time. I never get tired of it."

He should have known, right? They've gone to the ocean together. Or--well, they've had calls near the water before. That guy who got struck by lightning. The shark.

The tsunami.

But they've never just gone. Buck has never tagged along with him and Chris on any of their trips, and he and Buck have no reason to just take a beach day together.

Joy doesn't need a reason, right? He can just do it.

"Cool," says Eddie. "Let's go."

"Now?"

"What else are we doing?"

It hasn't been a problem, exactly, their lack of things to do. It's just kind of new, the way they're hanging out in the last week. Usually they have Chris, or girlfriends, or boyfriends. They have some reason to stop being together, and now they just…don't. And Buck just keeps on coming over, hanging out on Eddie's couch, in his space, like he can't bear to be in his loft now that Tommy isn't there.

Or something.

"You got some trunks I can borrow?" Buck asks.

"Are we swimming?"

"You want to go to the beach and not swim?"

Most of the time, that's what he does. When Chris was younger he'd get in the water, but the last few years it's been Eddie supervising while Chris does his own thing far enough away that it doesn't look like he's being supervised.

But Chris is in Texas. And, yeah, it's November, but Buck doesn't seem to care.

"I'll see what I've got," he says and finds he has two pairs of trunks in good enough shape that he's not embarrassed about anyone wearing them. Small miracles.

He throws the bigger pair to Buck and then goes to change in his bedroom. Buck will be doing the same thing in the bathroom, not for the first time, but he's never been changing into Eddie's trunks before. Did Ana ever wear anything of his? Marisol didn't. Buck might be the first person since Shannon.

As long as they fit, it's fine. Not a big deal at all.

They take Buck's car, the podcast he's listening to about the issues with the keto diet resuming as soon as he turns it on. Hen has gotten tired of explaining why his diets might be a problem herself and is outsourcing, which Eddie can't blame her for, but he doesn't find the resources nearly as interesting as Buck does. He already knows he doesn't want to do keto.

"You don't need to cheer me up, you know," Buck says, about halfway to the beach, without bothering to pause the keto thing. "I'm doing okay."

"I know."

It's mostly true. Buck has seemed fine with the breakup. Not happy, but not heartbroken either. He's been a little quiet about it, more so than Eddie was expecting. All he'll say is that Tommy initiated it, but he understands why.

"I'm trying to be happier," he tells Buck. "For me."

"Is that a thing you can try? Like, aren't you just happy or not?"

"If that was true, the ocean wouldn't bring you joy, right?" He lets out a breath, his stomach tied in inconvenient knots. "Someone pointed out that when I had the choice between something that would make me happy and something that wouldn't, I picked the one that wouldn't."

Buck mulls this over for a long moment. "I always figured that's because you're more mature than I am." It's only half a joke.

"Yeah, that's one way of looking at it." His breath shudders more this time. "Anyway. I'm not doing that anymore. I'm looking for things that bring me joy. So I figure if the ocean does that for you, maybe it'll do it for me, too."

"I hope so."

They set up like Eddie would with Chris, towels and belongings planted in the sand, the only difference that they left their phones in the car since no one is staying behind. He keeps his back turned as they shed the layers of clothing they have on, but when Buck hands him a tube of sunscreen, he has no choice but to stare at the expanse of bare back. The motions are familiar, nothing he hasn't done a thousand times for Chris, but…

Well, he's never done it for Buck.

Buck makes him turn around so he can return the favor, a much less familiar process. These days, he usually leaves his shirt on.

But he knows Buck's hands. They're familiar, all heat and callus. Careful, incongruously so. Buck looks like he's built clumsy, someone who can't do delicate work, and maybe he knows that too. Like happiness to Eddie, precision doesn't come naturally to Buck. He has to put the effort in, and he does. Eddie's skin lights up with every stroke of Buck's hands, so he's sure that Buck gets every inch.

And then he keeps going a little longer. Just to make sure.

"Okay," says Buck at last. "We're good to go."

Eddie is expecting Buck to run into the ocean like an overgrown puppy, all bright enthusiasm despite the chill, but he's cautious. He dips a toe in, then his foot, then the other. He walks in slowly enough that Eddie overtakes him, even though he's not running. He's just eager.

"The first time I went into the ocean, I was in Virginia Beach," Buck explains without making Eddie ask. "It was May, and I thought it would be warm enough, it was a hot May. But I ran in and it was so cold. I ran right back out."

"Goes to show," says Eddie.

"What, exactly? I know how the water's going to be today. It's cold."

The water is probably around the same temperature as it was in Virginia Beach in May. Eddie shivers, but doesn't stop, not until he's up past his knees. He smiles at Buck, who's still just letting the waves lap his toes. "Yeah, it's nice anyway. It's hot out."

"Not hot enough."

"It's fine."

He's in up to his ankles now. "You're not getting the joy, though."

"I am."

"Eddie."

"I'm getting used to it."

"You're not supposed to get used to it. You're supposed to be be making choices that make you happy right away, right?"

"I am happy," he says again, and it doesn't feel like a lie. "It's nice, there's no one else here. And it's not cold enough for us to get hypothermia."

"Are you sure this isn't just for me?" Eddie cocks his head, and Buck clarifies, "For my benefit."

"Should it be?"

Buck kicks at a wave. "He said I wasn't ready. Tommy. That's why he broke up with me. I asked him to move in with me, and he broke it off instead."

"So he's an idiot," Eddie says. "Always knew there was a chance, but I was hoping I was wrong."

"Is he, though? Was he wrong? I didn't really want him to move in. I just wanted…" He huffs. "I want to be done with this, you know? I'm ready to be with someone. And I think it could have been him."

It's not like getting shot, or even like getting punched. It's like a bullet or a fist going past him, close enough to graze the skin. Close enough that he's thinking about how much it could have hurt.

"But that's shitty, right? Like, how long could I have kepg going just because I didn't have a reason to break up with him? He was…fun. I liked him. I liked feeling like I'd figured it out. Like that was the last piece. I like guys too."

"Maybe it was," Eddie says. The water is lapping against his legs, the surf gentle. He's used to the temperature where he's submerged, but it's only halfway up his thighs. Every time the droplets splash higher, there's this shock of sharp little pinpricks.

He's so fucking happy.

"Maybe that was the last piece, but that doesn't mean Tommy is it. Maybe you're ready, but you're not ready for him."

"I'm just tired," says Buck. "I'm tired of waiting for someone to want me enough, you know? I'm ready to settle."

"You shouldn't," says Eddie. "You shouldn't be with someone just to be with anyone."

"You can build it," he argues, like Chris angling for a later bedtime or more video games before homework. "Love. Like you and Shannon did."

Nausea roils his stomach. "We didn't. It wasn't like that."

"I know it wasn't perfect, but you two were working on it. You were going to--"

"She wanted a divorce. Before she died. That was one of the last things she told me. We weren't going to have another kid, we weren't going to get married again, we weren't going to be together." He's not crying, but in that way where he is very aware that he's not crying. Where Not Crying is currently defining his existence. "I think we could have been friends," he says. "And maybe we could have figured it out. Been together again, made it good. That's what I told myself. And that's…easy."

"Easy?" Buck asks, in a small voice. Like Eddie is telling him a fairy tale he wishes could be true.

Which Eddie is, actually.

"If she was the love of my life and I lost her, then that was it. No one else would ever measure up. Nothing else could ever be as good. It was never going to work."

"But she wasn't?"

"Maybe she was. Or maybe--" He's Not Crying. "Maybe I don't just get one love, or even just one life. Maybe it doesn't have to be about finding her again. It can be about finding someone new. Someone who…"

He chokes then, the words dying in his throat. Buck is dazzling in the sunlight, his eyes as blue as the sea, his expression open, waiting. His whole existence focused on Eddie.

Eddie would marry him today. Eddie would marry him tomorrow, Eddie would marry him yesterday. Eddie would tie himself to Buck in any way Buck could think of, in every way, with wills, with contracts, with mortgages, with handcuffs, with string.

"Someone who brings me joy," he finishes.

"Joy," says Buck. He looks over the horizon, smiles, shakes his head.

Eddie's chest is too small and too big. He's never had so much in him.

"I've never had that," he muses. "Someone who makes me feel like the ocean."

"Like the ocean," Eddie says. "Yeah."

[burningdaybreak]

Happy birthday Akito!!

(Disclaimer: This post contains personal opinions, headcanons, and interpretations regarding Akito and content related to him, and is not particularly analytical. Also it may be a bit incoherent and unserious at times... it's a quite lighthearted post.) Hello everyone! Today I am not posting an essay, but rather, a regular post about my favorite character since it's his birthday today. He's a very special character to me, and I wanted to write something to show how much I love and appreciate him... despite how much he makes me suffer in gachas... you evil creature. *coughs* Anyways, let's get to it! Time to talk about my beloved ginger, Akito Shinonome.

0. Why Akito Shinonome?

(I've already talked plenty and very in-depth about him before in The Gay Akito Thesis™, and some things may be repeated here.) Akito is an extremely special character to me; I think I can safely say he's currently my favorite character ever. Back when I first saw him (in a picture with Touya), my first thought was "wow they're ugly"... unfortunately there's a funny trend where, whenever I call a character ugly, they're likely to become one of my favorites of that series. And, as expected, he did. Truthfully, I don't think he's ugly at all (neither is Touya)... but that was my first impression of them; I saw the picture was right after reading the Nocturne Touya's side story conversation, and I didn't expect those designs at all. Although I should say Akito is very much my type of character appearance-wise. Either way, the story was quite gay, and that was enough to get me a bit interested in them... though I wouldn't get into Sekai until around five months later. The first proper content I saw of them was actually Akito's 3✰ card from A Song of Vows For You, Dressed in Pure White! (Touya's first mixed event), and also Akito's line from Vivid BAD SQUAD's main story's chapter 19:

🥞 Oh, shut up already. Don’t go makin’ this complicated. I want to be with you, and you want to be with me as well. And after that, our dream will come true. … Isn’t that enough?

Unfortunately (or not?), this was enough to get me properly interested in him and the game, and shortly after I got into Project Sekai, then started playing the game itself around a month later despite not having ever played a rhythm game before. One thing I regret to admit is that I had a very different first impression of him from what he's really like: I was led to believe that he was a sort of dudebro "no homo" flirt / charmer character, with deep issues and homosexual tendencies... because that's sort of the type of character I often fall for, which makes me mad but that's not really important... Though, technically, I wouldn't say the description is really wrong; he kind of is a bit dudebro, in the way he acts like a teenage boy who tries so hard to be masculine, and also "no homo" for the aforementioned reason and also trying to hide his insecurities and "weaknesses"; he has a charming side, shown as his "good boy" mode, putting on a nice face in order to avoid unnecessary trouble; and both deep issues and, god, absolutely homosexual tendencies. As much as I dislike it, I understand why people mischaracterize him like this: this is more or less the first impression he gives, and I too fell for it (although in my case it was more word of mouth)... but I think people should learn to read and actually get to know Akito rather than to keep mischaracterizing him. But, Akito's writing is sort of poetic, since he gives one impression to people and they assume things about him, but he's actually a different way, and the fact that it happens both in-game and to actual players is funny. I quite like this. I believe he's more or less designed the way he is to appeal to people that like this kind of character, but what I like about Akito is that he subverts those tropes and becomes something much more interesting than a typical charming guy with issues. Upon reading stories, I realized Akito's not as shallow or simple as I was lead to believe... he's actually a pretty complex character and... with many issues. I found him quite fascinating. The fact that he's a character whose entire point is that there's a lot more to him than meets the eye — that he's actually someone who works very hard and is very passionate about what he does, and wants to prove everyone wrong and show that he can actually do and get past what he has set himself to do, is all so good. He will surpass everyone's expectations and show just how amazing he really is. Although I'm repeating myself here, it's very poetic that he has proven me wrong and surpassed my initial expectations... and not just my initial expectations, but he always surprises me with his new developments. He's a character that just keeps growing, with every new focus actually fleshing him out further, and showing just how complex he is. I love it a lot... I love Akito so much.

His character development is simply wonderful. Going from someone who had no skill or talent at all, but still trying his best because he suddenly found something he wants to dedicate his life to, not stopping at anything and always pushing forward, no matter what. In his events, he learns that it's okay to rely on others and how he doesn't have to rush ahead of the people that share his dream; later becoming more clear the power of working with others that share your goal, allowing to create something amazing together; that he is fine as he is and how everyone has gone through obstacles, even those he admires, letting him know that he is doing well; and, after all his hard work and improving so much, learning to trust his emotions and listening to his heart, he becomes someone that is respected by others and even becomes a source of inspiration, the same way that he was inspired by others in the past... therefore creating a chain of inspiration.

Now in his recent event, after finally accomplishing his dream and surpassing RAD WEEKEND, Akito has sort of burnt out; with the grand goal that he had set his eyes on finally achieved, his flame sort of extinguishes. Although he knows what he wants to do next (conquering the world, and singing alongside his partner and teammates), Akito doesn't have something that truly motivates him like surpassing RAD WEEKEND did. But, after a talk with KAITO, who tells Akito that the world is big and that he will eventually find something or someone that makes his heart beat again, like RAD WEEKEND did in the past; and then facing off one of two extremely talented twins and being talked down to for not giving it his all due to his lack of motivation — Akito regains his momentum, not willing to be stepped on by others, and realizing that, as KAITO said, there is so much world he hasn't seen, and his new "motivation" is to keep pushing ahead, in order to eventually find something that motivates him, once again — find a fuel to rekindle his flame, so to say. I mentioned it to a friend the other day when he said that Rekindle the flame is the epitome of Akito's character, but pretty much every event is the epitome of his character; all his development piles up with each new one.

It's just... so good. He has a very cohesive character, both in arc and development, and with each event you learn more and more of why Akito is the way he is. Such a wonderful and fascinating character. I really like how he doesn't give up and just pushes ahead, relying on his instincts and what he feels is right (although not thinking things through sometimes comes back to bite him in the ass), listening to his heart and his emotions. It's also fun how extreme he is, both in the way he thinks and the way he talks, always saying stuff along the lines of "I'll do this until my heart stops beating!"... boy don't be so dramatic. He's passionate, dedicated, true to himself, and loyal. He also has his bad side, such as being reckless, mainly keeping to himself and those he trusts (mainly his partner), and a bit foul-mouthed. His complexity is just so great, a character with a duality both within himself and also with his partner, as I talked about in my previous essay. Speaking of... I haven't even talked about a very important part of Akito's character yet: his partner, Touya. Touya is an extremely important person to Akito, the person that has been there for him from the beginning, always supporting him and walking by his side, no matter what; the one he shared his dream with and who he wanted to reach it with above anybody else; Touya's not just his best friend, but also the one and only partner he will ever have. Saying Akito is in love with Touya (whether platonic or romantic) wouldn't be an exaggeration — from the first moment he set his eyes on Touya, from the moment Akito first heard him sing, he knew he wanted to sing with Touya; then after singing with him, it became clear to Akito: Touya was the person he wanted to surpass his dream alongside with. Even though Akito wasn't actively looking for a partner, he ended up finding someone that he'd forever trust and cherish, until the end of time — always together.

I've already written about it a lot before, but Akito and Touya have an extremely sweet relationship, one of mutual love, trust, and support — with a very close bond and knowing each other the most, they have a connection deeper than with anybody else in the world; they know with just a simple look how the other's feeling or what's going through their head. Relying on one another and pushing each other forward both through mutual support but also a desire to surpass each other, they help each other grow... and that's what being partners is all about. They're the best partner they both could ask for. To say they are inseparable would be putting it lightly, they are pretty much together all the time and do everything together... they want to be together, with each other, no matter what. They're simply made for each other. I really enjoy their relationship a lot. Despite being "simple" and mostly established, they're just very sweet together and, even today, still manage to find ways to have their relationship grow even if it's subtle things. As they individually grow, so does their relationship, and I think that's so great. Have I said yet they're my favorite relationship in the game? Because it is. It's also very cute how Akito has such a soft spot for Touya; many of the things he normally wouldn't do, as he usually avoids contact with most people, are due to him giving in to Touya. And also how, lately, Akito lowkey tries to fish for praise from Touya (as seen in both the historical Let It Ring! Beautiful Sound!'s Touya card's side story, where he sets up a study date with Touya but doesn't need Touya's help at all and wanted to show off; and in Rekindle the flame Chapter 4, where he tells Touya unprompted that he already did his homework), but it backfires and he gets flustered when Touya gives a more genuine and embarrassing response than expected... Man. They're so cute. They make me lowkey mad.

☕️ Akito, you… You actually studied properly…!! 🥞 Whoa--?! 🎤 That smile on Touya's face, I've never seen anything like it… 🍷 He's smiling… 🍌 Wow! I've never seen Touya smile like that before! 🥞 …Well, after surpassing the legend, it'd be lame if I failed…

(^ This could kill a grown man.) Akito has his cute sides, like the aforementioned giving in to Touya's demands and also lowkey wanting to be praised by his partner for doing a good job; he also has "moe aspects", like his moe sleeves (the sleeves of his clothes covering his hands quite often), or how, despite his "scary" and cool appearance, he's afraid of dogs and also likes sweet food (with pancakes 🥞 being his defining food). To finish off, I like how hard he tries despite nothing going his way, and everyone rejecting him at first, and now becomes a source of inspiration for others; and just how much he grows as more time passes. I also like how much he cares about Touya and his other close ones, even if he's reluctant to show it often, especially towards the latter... and so on. In summary, I love him a lot. There's likely quite a few things I forgot to mention, but there's so much about him that I like... Akito is simply a wonderful and fascinating character.

Leaving that aside, I also wanted to talk a bit about headcanons... but my main headcanon for him is Akito being homosexual, and I have a whole thesis written for that. The gay Akito headcanon is just so special to me because, as a gay man myself, I normally view characters I like as gay, and sometimes the headcanon feels a bit forced... but Akito being gay just fits so well into his narrative and story, and I'd say even enhances it, which makes me very happy. He's just... so homosexual to me. It's definitely not canon (it is to me), and likely never will be (although you have to be blind to not notice just how utterly gay he acts), but it's a very important headcanon to me nonetheless. As I always say, his relationship with Touya is not inherently romantic, but goddamn if they don't act like a couple so often; it's just so easy to interpret it as romantic. It drives me crazy. Their extremely close and deep bond, and how much they love and support each other, and their already established relationship by the time main story starts, makes them seem like an old married couple that already knows each other so well and don't really need words to communicate or know how the other feels... and yet, they still have so much room to grow and learn about each other... it's just great. Besides that, I don't have too many headcanons, I'm a quite canonpilled person; but curiously, some of the few ones I have kind of... became actually canon?

Love at first sight Akito — I always believed Akito was the first one to fall for Touya (whether platonic or romantically), and that Touya "fell harder", in fandom terms; and Len's World Link chapter actually showed us the moment Akito first met Touya and, well. He genuinely fell for him on first sight. Again, it doesn't have to be necessarily romantic, but the way he was like "... I can't take my eyes off him." and kept visiting that one place where he met that cool guy that sings really well, looking for the perfect chance to chat with him (and then deliver his lame not-really-pick-up "Hey, you look interesting. Wanna sing together?" line)... very much feels like a lovestruck boy. I don't believe he actually realizes he's in love with Touya until much later, but this was still a very shocking revelation. Love at first sight Akito is real. Cat Akito — This one was mainly based on canon content, as ultimately "What animal would this character be?" isn't that serious, but cat Akito just makes the most sense for him for the many reasons I've explained in previous essays: the "default orange cat" appearance (orange hair with green eyes); the actual orange cat that always appears around Touya and is incredibly fond of it; canonically being afraid of dogs, a trait often associated with cats due to their "rivalry"; nekokaburi, meaning "to don a cat's mask", which has actually been used to describe Akito's "double-faced" nature and being similar to how cats act nice but may actually be mean, and so on. Akito "being a cat that acts like a dog / wants to be a dog" just makes so much sense for him. He lives in a world surrounded by dogs, and the people around him are often dog-like (like An, Ken-san, KAITO, the white boy twins, and arguably Touya), with Akito clashing with and/or respecting them. Despite being afraid of dogs, he respects them and would like to be as cool and strong as them, and so he often acts dog-like or even actually tries to be a dog (such as choosing a wolf avatar during close game/OFFLINE), with cards also showing him depicted as similar to a dog (his Kick it up a notch card's trained illustration). Anyways, sorry, I went on a little ramble: in Rekindle the flame (in one of Kohane's card stories), however, we actually get a character directly stating that Akito's very much like a cat, which is as close as we get to confirmation of Akito being meant to be a cat. (We also got animal assignments for An and Touya, those being dog and panda respectively; along with Kohane always having been a hamster, we now have official animal assignments for everyone in Vivid BAD SQUAD) Technically, the previous times Akito was assigned an animal (like wolf) were he himself choosing an animal, so him being perceived by others as a cat is probably more correct; however, I kind of believe that dog isn't wrong and may even be more appropriate. If Akito wants to be a dog and says he's a dog, even if he's a cat, then he's a dog!! So neither choice is wrong, after all. ... In short: cat Akito is kind of canon now! But it's really not that serious. It's fine to see him as a dog, and if that's what he wants to be, then he's a dog to me. Even if he's actually a cat? Yeah... you're crazy man. And then some minor headcanons, such as AuDHD Akito (people often see him as having ADHD, which very much makes sense, but I think this boy is also a bit autistic; him and his hyperfixation on RAD WEEKEND...), or being insomniac / has a hard time sleeping a whole night without waking up once, or even appearance headcanons like freckles. These are mostly projecting myself a bit onto him, but I believe (at least the first two) make sense for him and fit his character and personality. I mainly like headcanons that have a canon foundation, pretty much.

1. My favorite Akito cards

Next, I'd like to talk about my favorite Akito cards, and what I like about them:

4☆ Inheritance Flame

Wonderful card. The untrained illustration is so bright, and the scene it represents was so beautiful... Akito finally figuring everything out, and being so thankful to Ken-san for everything that he did for him. It's a very gorgeous and meaningful illustration. As for the trained illustration, even though it's not that special for what it looks like (although I still like it a lot), I really like it for the symbolism of "finding the exit" (with FIND THE EXIT being the name of the event gacha itself); Akito finding himself and figuring out that he has to let out his emotions and not be so harsh on himself, and also using how he truly feels to enhance his singing. Furthermore, it also represents how, in the event story, he's the one leading Vivid BAD SQUAD back to their path of surpassing RAD WEEKEND once again after Taiga previously defeated them, and taking the first step to finally holding their event, now that they have a proper plan of attack. The card also symbolizes how now Akito becomes a source of inspiration to others (such as Kotaro in the event itself), his endeavor and all his hard work being an inspiration to others to follow their dreams. Furthermore, I have my own interpretation of Akito's painted nails (which I often talk about, tbh), because it's the first card that depicts Akito wearing painted nails. Considering his relationship with his own masculinity and gender, and often acting stereotypically masculine, but painted nails commonly being considered "feminine" and a thing for girls, I like to use this as fuel for my gay Akito headcanon, and interpret it as Akito becoming more comfortable in how he presents himself and trying out new things, since in BURN MY SOUL he learns to not be so harsh on himself and trusting and showing his emotions more... therefore painting his nails to try being more comfortable and proud of the fact that he's gay, and not viewing it as a "weakness" or something to be ashamed of. (Also that random rainbow in the card kind of drives me crazy. Why is there a rainbow there? How is it forming? There is no water. What's it reflecting from. Just... huh??) Also the costume is great. I look at this outfit and think "Damn... that's a guy gay" (lighthearted, of course). Love the combination of black and orange; the orange really stands out with the fully black outfit. Also those boots are wonderful; between the orange nails (very bold and epic color choice) and the boots, this is peak gay fashion. So, yeah, it's a very beautiful card. I like it a lot.

4☆ A Terrifying Game of Tag

Not much to say about the untrained. Baby Akito is cute. The origin of his fear of dogs... fun scene. Anyways, the trained illustration is very good, I like it a lot. It's just... such a fun card. Akito in his cards has historically always looked "cool" or "handsome" or "intimidating", among other things, but this is the first time he gets a card where the main intention is looking cute... this is a very cute card...! Between the small blush... the fang... the moe sleeves... the puppy... Akito and his favorite food (pancakes), which is also a cute part of him... it's just so adorable. Also, as an extra detail, his choker being shaded blueish in the card. Yeah, why not? It can be a little gay too. Furthermore, there's the fun irony of turning the guy who's scared of dogs into one. Rise as ONE! is all about Akito facing his fear of dogs and interacting with the dog owners of the cast (Minori and Honami... and Rui with his robot dog, I suppose), and the card set turning all of them into dogs. Going on a brief tangent here: people often use this card as proof that Akito is "definitely a dog", but to me it feels more like a joke / funny set than anything. Rather than an actual dog, he's giving more "(cat)guy that has been turned into a dog as divine punishment". This guy is not pleased to be a dog...!! While he's very dog-coded, and it's fine to see him as a dog (as I explained earlier), it's not as simple as "he's a dog and nothing else". That's just wrong. He is more complex than that!!! Though, who cares... he can be a dog, it's not that serious. The only thing to take into account, though, is that if Akito's a dog, so is Touya. That's all. Anyways... costume-wise, it's so wonderful. The outfit itself is very cute, and the small dog tail is really cute. Unfortunately, considering the tail is orange, you can only really use this costume on Akito... that's perhaps the main issue of this card set's costumes. Regardless, I really like it. It pulls off mixing the adorable concept (with the oversized sweater and moe sleeves, and the doggy tail) and typical Akito things (rings and piercings) quite well. Also, the ears are so great; they're available as a common accessory too, so you can use them with any Akito hairstyle (although they'll lack the piercings that are only available with the exclusive hairstyle). Fun fact: Did you know the ears and tail wiggle in 3DMVs? It's so good... extremely cute. In short: amazing card, it quickly became one of my favorite Akito cards. He looks adorable. Puppy Akito I love you.

4☆ A Circle Signaling Our Determination

Well. That untrained illustration drives me crazy. It may not look like anything special, but Touya placing his hand on Akito's shoulder killed thousands. Akito is often (physically) leaning on Touya and touching him, so Touya reciprocating that touch, even if it's as simple as placing his hand on Akito's shoulder, is quite a big moment. Giving and receiving... that's what it's all about. Aun no Beats you're legendary. On the other hand, the trained is... well, genuinely... this is the gayest Akito has ever looked, in my humble and correct opinion. Even leaving aside the gay bar joke (which is quite fitting and makes me giggle), I just look at him and think "wow... that's a gay man". This is a gay man if I've ever seen one (and I have. I'm a gay man myself); I've seen gay guys that look like this before. In fact, I could even say I look like this... perhaps? (Up to debate) Between the fashion style, his (pardon my language) cuntiness, the setting, the details of the card (the partner gems), and, of course, Akito's one and only partner being by his side, this is simply the gayest Akito card ever (to me!) Thematically, it's a pretty good card, too. Celebrating their victory after working so hard, throwing a party at a gay bar, with the militaresque outfits representing how hard they've fought to reach this point, like they were waging a war on a legend, and came out on top?

When it comes to the costume... god, I like it a lot. Perhaps one of my favorite costumes in the game so far. Not trying to sound weird by saying this, but it's such a handsome and attractive outfit. I would totally wear something like it. I like the boldness of the deep pink pants, which look so good with the general dark colors of the rest of the outfit. Also the bright pink (which is Vivid BAD SQUAD's unit color) shoelaces on the black boots are so good. Really enjoy it!! The hairstyle is also really good. Even though most people seem to dislike it (although I understand the point of view of "boys mainly only get short haircuts"...), it's personally one of my favorite Akito hairstyles. It looks cute... also I've seen gay guys with this hairstyle, so bonus points for that. The one issue I have is... it's difficult to separate the hairstyle from the costume, especially the former — I feel the hairstyle doesn't look good with many costumes that aren't this card's costume... but it's okay, it's a great hairstyle regardless. In short, it's a very good card. As a gay man myself, I feel a lot of gay energy from this one (although I do from all his cards... but this one the most, so far!)

4☆ The Reason for the Words Given to Me

Oh, such a good card... the untrained represents a really nice moment from Find A Way Out, where Akito's so happy about learning Ken-san was like him, too, validating his feelings and all the effort he has poured so far, and making him feel better about himself... so good. I also enjoy how in the card he looks like he's on the verge of crying from happiness, and he actually cries over it; although it happens off-screen, and we only learn of it in the side story, where Ena comments on his red eyes (since Akito has a tendency to rub his eyes when crying because he dislikes it). Argh... so good. And the trained... if I were to say everything I want to say about it, this post would double in size. But, in short, I just. Love it. I like the red and blue theme of the card set representing the heart, with this being the overall theme of the event, and a pretty important theme for Akito's character, with Akito clutching the microphone's cord to his chest, where his heart is, to symbolize how music keeps his heart beating; the life and death theme from Kashika and this card, and using it as an analogy of the contradiction of wanting to keep singing but also wanting to give up ("wanting to live despite also wanting to die"); and, of course, Akito's big, genuine smile, feeling happiness as he falls, stopped mid-air... Suspended Animation being the translated name of the song is just so fitting. The outfit is also very good. I'm personally more commonly a fan of simpler and comfy outfits, and this one is just. Very good! One of my favorite costumes in the game; the simplicity of it makes it easy to cosplay / wear in real life, which is really nice. There really isn't much else to say about it, though, it's just very good. Anyways, it's just, genuinely, such a good card; how it symbolizes the event story and the song so well is amazing. Easily one of the best cards in the game.

4☆ The Thirsty Wanderer

Oh goodness. I'll begin talking about the trained illustration this time... it's an extremely pretty card. I'd rank it among the best cards in the game. I like it a lot. The setting is gorgeous (I enjoy desertic areas in games a lot), with gorgeous lighting and composition, and Akito's outfit is really nice... the theme is very good. I also quite like that tiny blue lizard... wonder what it represents, huh... The untrained, however? Genuinely (in my opinion), the best card in the game. The first time I saw this illutrastion, I lost my mind. Like... wow. Much like the previous card, seeing Akito's genuine smile just fills me with so much happiness; it was such a nice moment of the card story, too, where Rin and Len glomp Akito after he recovers his memories and he falls to the ground, and laughs wholeheartedly and is able to relax a bit after experiencing the horrors of his Fragment Sekai (memory loss and raging sandstorm in a deserted world? Wow). Although the illustration is kind of simple, it's just... such a nice card for Akito, someone who is always trying really hard, and pushing himself, and being so rough on himself. Depicting him relaxed for a second, laughing and genuinely smiling is so heartwarming. I also like the meaning of the dandelion, the flower that appears in both illustrations: these flowers are known for their ability to thrive in challenging conditions, pushing through concrete, and returning year after year. This resilience has made them a powerful symbol of strength, determination, and the ability to overcome adversity. This fits Akito so much, it's actually amazing. It's a very good flower choice for him, I really like it...

So, even though the trained illustration is among the best in the game, the untrained is the best, so it's a bit conflicting which to use in-game (it's the untrained 99% of the time though). Anyways, going back to the trained, in this case the costume: it's a very good costume. Even though I'm not too big of a fan of asymmetry, I think this outfit pulls it off well. It fits the theme of a desert wanderer that just wears whatever he's able to wear. Also his headband is really nice. Another nice detail is that Akito doesn't wear his earrings (even in-game, he takes them off if the headband accessory is used), which is really neat. It fits the theme of not being the usual Akito, but rather a wanderer that forgot himself, and is trying to find himself and his purpose once again, so he loses one of his main traits... Oh and don't get me started on the hairstyle... this is Akito's best hairstyle, by far. I have very heated opinions about Akito's hairstyles (not about the hairstyles themselves, but more about the lack of variety in colors despite being the only character in the game with dyed hair?! What the hell, really), and this one is great because it actually changes his hair color, giving it a darker, red-ish color. Sort of burnt hair after being exposed to the sun so long? Furthermore, it just looks really good in general... it fits with so many costumes. Very versatile. I love it (as you'll see soon). Anyways, I extended myself a bit here... it's an amazing card. Overall, possibly one of the best cards in the game (biased? But I'm also always right); great illustrations, great costume, great hairstyle, oh and a great skill... what else could you ask for?

1.1. My favorite costumes for Akito

Following up the favorite cards section, I wanted to show some of my favorite costume combinations for Akito. Yes, 3/4 of them use the FES hair + glasses combination... not my fault it looks so good on him? Either way:

Outfit: Witness of duel, Variant 3 (WTWG Touya MR5 Costume) Accessory: SEKAI UNIVERSITY, Variant 1 (September 2023 Premium Mission Pass) Hairstyle: Over the Wasteland (FES Akito Hairstyle) Really gorgeous. I admittedly only MR5'd WTWG Touya just for this costume color; it's just... so good. Perhaps my favorite combination for Akito. The red and black look so great on him, and the glasses look good on him in general but they really fit with this costume, especially the black variant. Not much else to say here, he's just very good looking in this one.

Outfit: Color the past, Variant 1 (Concerto Touya MR1 Costume) Accessory: SEKAI UNIVERSITY, Variant 1 (September 2023 Premium Mission Pass) Hairstyle: Over the Wasteland (FES Akito Hairstyle) Yet another Touya card that I MR'd just for the costume; I wanted him to match Touya, but I didn't like having them wear the same thing, and this variant is technically Akito's official one (the one that he uses in The first concerto's After-Live). He looks soooo good in this costume, and the glasses are excellent with it. He matches Touya this way. He looks extremely gorgeous with this combination. Lovely. Beautiful. Very gay (affectionate).

Outfit: Fleek vivid, Variant 3 (WL Akito MR5 Costume) Accessory: SEKAI UNIVERSITY, Variant 1 (September 2023 Premium Mission Pass) Hairstyle: Over the Wasteland (FES Akito Hairstyle) For the third time in a row, FES Akito's hairstyle + those glasses. Yeah, he looks so great in them. I personally like this costume a lot, even though people like to bully him for his big shoes. I think they're fine? Anyways, this is yet another combination where I put Akito in a red and black outfit. I think he rocks those colors, haha. He looks very cool in this one. Really like!

Outfit: Notice Suspenders, Default (FES Touya Costume) Accessory: Noble Paladin, Default (WD/Knight Akito Accessory) Hairstyle: Noble Paladin (WD/Knight Akito Hairstyle) Finally, something different! This combination always makes me laugh because a friend called it the "gay best friend Akito" and, it has sticked with me since. So I kinda stole it from them, sorry. I don't use it as often as the others, because I like the FES Akito hairstyle way too much, but it's probably my next most used combination after the previous ones. Always fun to use for the meme reasons. He looks good in a fun way. Though, to be fair, Akito looks good in anything I put him in. 🧡 (debatable, actually)

2. Akito events' commissioned songs

Next I want to give my thoughts on all of the Akito events' commissioned songs; I already talked about all of them (except the most recent one, Fuel) more in-depth in The Gay Akito Thesis™, and I plan to write an essay for Fuel eventually, so don't expect much of an analysis here!

🥞♪ la-dee-la-lee-la-la la-lee-la

CRaZY (CR詠ZY, CReiZY), Akito's fourth commissioned song. I'd say it's the "worst" of his commissioned songs... but that doesn't mean much when you're a 9/10 and the other four are 9.5/10 or 10/10. It's still a great song. All of Akito's commissioned songs are really good. Honestly I don't have that much to say about this one. I like it. The 2DMV is nice and the song has fun lyrics. The more relaxed and fun vibe of the song is quite fitting for the event it came with, as in BURN MY SOUL Akito learns to let loose and relax a bit, and to stop suppressing his emotions and accepting them, and himself. With the 詠 kanji meaning "singing / a song", this song pretty much is... a crazy song; it's basically about Akito letting loose and finding his own tune. It presents a nice contrast to Akito's previous commissioned song, Kashika, and its theme of "wanting to live despite also having wanted to die" — since in CRaZY, he is willing to give everything for music. He fully owns it now. But yeah, I don't have much to say about this song that I haven't said in the past; I like it, it's good, and I enjoy listening to it whenever it's chosen in Multi-Live Rooms.

🥞♪ After following the never ending dream 🥞♪ I’ll find my own light, all over

Gekkou (月光, Moonlight), Akito's second commissioned song. Gekkou is a fascinating song in how it's barely related to the concept of the event, with the event being about Akito learning about, well, the power of unity and how working together and communicating with other people that have the same dream and feelings as you leads to creating something great — while Gekkou is about subconsciously copying those you admire and accidentally becoming a copy of them; or, in other words, about imposter syndrome. It's a very interesting choice for this event considering it's not really related at all, but nonetheless a fitting song for Akito, who so badly wants to find his own light and be something that is admired and respected for what he is. It's also fitting for Vivid BAD SQUAD in general in how they're chasing after RAD WEEKEND and holding an event that surpasses it, but making it something different and memorable — that is, making it their own legend. Furthermore, I personally really enjoy the theme of the moon and the moonlight, and chasing after it, and using the moonlight as an analogy for something that consumes you whole and is always there; something you're chasing after but can't quite reach. As a bonus thing, even though the song is definitely not about Touya, it can sort of be related to him: Touya is very explicitly themed after the moon, and Akito's relationship with him is not simply one of singing together and being with each other, but also of pushing each other forward and surpassing the other, constantly chasing after each other in order to improve themselves — therefore, while Akito's moon is (or rather, was) absolutely RAD WEEKEND, Touya is also that one moon that Akito's chasing after, the moonlight that always shines on him and that he is attempting to reach, in order to be alongside him. Plus, with this song, its jacket, and the event cards being themed after Touya's theme (the moon), and the previous Touya focus (Same Dream,Same Colors) being themed after the sun and sunrise (both in its jacket, song, and event cards), and both songs having Akito and Touya Another Vocals, I feel it's kind of intentional. Anyways, got derailed a bit there — it's a great song! I enjoy it a lot. Oh also forgot to mention the 2DMV itself, it's pretty nice. Hidari's art is really good.

🥞♪ Just like a movie, this is my story.

Cinema (シネマ), Akito's first commissioned song. Quite a classic. I still like it. The, well, cinema and movie theme is really fun; the 2DMV is still great even today; on the other hand, the 3DMV has shown its age a bit but it's far from bad. There isn't much mystery to this song: it's about Akito's journey with music. I personally think the song kind of sounds like an ending or outro song, which is quite fitting for the song pretty much being Akito's story from the beginning, where he's pushing forward despite all the setbacks and everything that goes wrong because he has a dream he wants to achieve; to the end, where the becomes the leading star he has always wanted to be, reaching the top, and retelling his journey. Just like a movie, this is my story. It also fits Vivid BAD SQUAD as a whole, considering surpassing RAD WEEKEND is everyone's dream and they're all working together to reach that goal, and it also ties with the theme of the story of Akito leaning on his teammates because it's not just his dream and they have to work together to accomplish it, and they will always be there for him — but ultimately, the song is about Akito, and how he wants to be the protagonist. With his partner and teammates by his side, supporting him, Akito will become the leading star. It's a good song.

🥞♪ Beat, beat, o heart of mine! 🥞♪ It might be unsteady, but even so, this is my pulse.

Kashika (仮死化, Suspended Animation), Akito's third commissioned song. Oh boy. Kashika is a very interesting case for me because, back when it came out, I absolutely despised it. I just... didn't really like it musically? I'm not really sure why. Some parts sounded fine, but others I absolutely disliked? However, I felt really bad about this for a long while, because Akito's my favorite character, and even though I knew the song was special, I just... couldn't get myself to like it. But, some random day, I decided to read the lyrics... and my opinion on the song immediately changed. I felt so dumb. That was when I decided to start reading lyrics for songs (and then CYBER PUNK DEADBOY fully ingrained that into me... it has funny lyrics). Basically, even though Kashika wasn't my type of song at first, once I read the lyrics, and learned about all the emotion and feelings behind it and all the love that the producer put into it and his story with music... I started liking it, and it quickly became my favorite Akito commissioned song. I love not just what it represents and how it symbolizes Akito's character and story so well, but also the general message it gives and telling the producer's story with music... the desire to keep doing what you love, despite also wanting to give up... and pushing forward despite that... ultimately accepting your feelings and using them to fuel your passion... so good. So, Kashika went from a song I hated to my favorite Akito commissioned song, thanks to reading its lyrics. This is why I now believe it's really important to read everything. However, Kashika sort of got overtaken recently...

🥞♪ Burn more, that's what I was born for... 🥞♪ Burn more... 🥞♪ FUEL IS FOR GOING ON! 🥞♪ BURN! IT DOWN!! UNTIL IT FALLS OVER!!!

FUEL (フューエル), Akito's fifth and most recent commissioned song. This song quickly became my favorite Akito commissioned song. From the first listen, I thought it was amazing; however, it wasn't quite my favorite Akito commissioned song yet. But once I watched the 2DMV, and listened to the full version, everything changed... the 2DMV is simply amazing, I really enjoyed the plane and aviator theme. Furthermore, the 3DMV was really good, too; the lighting and visual effects were great. Although, even though I love the cards we got for the event, I'm lowkey sad that the cards weren't aviator themed after watching the 2DMV... it's like, why? It was a perfect chance to do something innovative with a Vivid BAD SQUAD card set, even if I like these cards. Sorry for the small rant... It's a great song, very Akito-like lyrics; always taking things so extremely and seriously. Burn more, that's what I was born for... he's extremely dedicated and always pushing forward; even if he has nothing currently motivating him, he will keep burning on, and eventually find that fuel that will rekindle his flame, once again (sorry, I'm cheesy). He's such a good character... I love his dedication. Except when he overworks himself. He's a bit self-destructive. But it's also part of his charm? Gotta love characters with issues. Regardless, it kind of overtook Kashika as my favorite Akito commissioned song due to how good FUEL sounds, with it being more of my genre of song, even if, objectively, it's not as deep or passionate as Kashika... but they're pretty close in my rankings, tbh. I love FUEL!

2.1. Favorite Akito Covers and Another Vocals

To finish off the songs section, I'll briefly mention some of my favorite Akito covers: Aun no Beats (阿吽のビーツ, Aun no Beats) — What can I even say... Read my Aun no Beats essay? This song is wonderful. Extremely representative of Akito and Touya and their relationship; I explain it quite in-depth in the aforementioned essay. Read the lyrics! I hope we get the full version eventually. Please. Nene5 is produced by Hanyuu Maigo so... there is HOPE! Never Give Up Coping! Fragile (フラジール) — Quite a classic. They were singing this stuff right from release?! They're insane. Second Akito and Touya-only cover (with no Virtual Singer), distinction shared with Aun no Beats. Truly a special song. Very similar to Aun no Beats in that it sort of represents the break-up period Akito and Touya went through during main story. Read the lyrics. Garando (ガランド, Airhead) — There is something deeply evil going on in this song. My jaw dropped while reading the lyrics. Have I mentioned it yet? Read the lyrics. Seriously. Very insane song. Grew on me a lot after reading the lyrics. I wanted to do only my top three covers but I have to give a special mention to Ame to Petra (雨とペトラ, Rain and Petra); quite a wonderful song too. I really like how it sounds, Akito and Touya sound really good in it. Yet again: read the lyrics. These covers really do something to your brain when you read the lyrics and think how they represent the characters. Also yes they're all Akito and Touya covers

And finally my favorite Another Vocals:

Shunran (春嵐) — Initially released as a full group cover, it got an Akito Another Vocal some time later. While I did like the original cover, the Akito Another Vocal is possibly one of the best in the game. It's just... wow. One of the best things we've gotten in a long time. This song was meant for Akito and I'm so glad he got this. I wish the original cover had been Akito and Touya only, even though Kohane and An sound pretty nice in it and it also fits them a bit, but the Akito Another Vocal is good. If you're a bit crazy like me, you can hear Touya a bit as the background vocal in some parts. I'm not sure if it's just the mental illness or he's genuinely there... but does it really matter? Living my own truth.

RAD DOGS — Touya's first commissioned event song; it got an Akito and Touya Another Vocal (along with an An and Kohane version) less than two months after its release. This is actually the only Akito and Touya shared Another Vocal, so it's extra special. The fact both partner pairs got shared Another Vocals for this song is great. The original version is already really good (RAD DOGS is in my top 3 songs in the game), but the Akito and Touya version is extremely good. The fact my favorite Vivid BAD SQUAD commissioned song has this alternate version is so great... Akito and Touya sound wonderful together.

Mirai (ミライ) — Touya's second commissioned event song; it got an Akito Another Vocal a few months later, along with a Touya Another Vocal. I already talked about both this song and Gekkou (which I'll also talk about in a bit) and what they mean for Akito and Touya in my previous essay, but the fact Akito and Touya got Another Vocals at the same time for this song is great. Truly inseparable. Anyways, this is a very nice song... very beautiful. I like it a lot. And the Another Vocals are so, so good. While I have a weak point for Akito and always use it, Touya's is also quite nice. It makes me so happy to listen to Akito's Another Vocal while thinking about the song's lyrics... ehehe... Read the lyrics by the way... Touya's such a wonderful character. Special mention to Gekkou (月光), Akito's second commissioned event song, which I talked about just earlier. (It gets no MP3 file because there's a limit of three per Tumblr post. Sorry!) Just like Mirai, it got Akito and Touya Another Vocals (at the same time too... inseparable, I'm telling you!). I like Gekkou a lot; it has interesting lyrics, and it sounds so great. Wonderful song. Akito's Another Vocal is amazing, I really like how he sounds in this one. He really slays the song... (?) Also, as an extra part, some songs that I would like to see them get Akito Another Vocals: CRaZY (CR詠ZY) — Please, please, please. He hasn't gotten an Another Vocal for one of his commissioned songs since Gekkou. I'd love this one, he'd sound so great. FUEL (フューエル) — Same as above; I really like this song so I'd kill for an Akito Another Vocal. Will wait (im)patiently for this one. Would add a third one but I don't have a particular one I truly want. Maybe Kinmokusei (金木犀), since Akito sounds really nice in that one. Not much else to say here.

3. Akito relationships

(Disclaimer: Harsh opinions ahead.) To finish off, I'll talk a bit about various Akito relationships:

I don't care that much tbh. ... Do I even need to say anything? I've written so many essays about them. Check them out by the way...! Unsurprisingly, Akito and Touya is my favorite Akito relationship. Although, as I always say, I like this pairing first and foremost platonically, since that's what is presented in canon; however, a romantic interpretation for them makes a lot of sense considering how they act with each other in canon, and I believe is the only romantic relationship that makes sense for either of them. It feels like a natural step of their relationship, something that will eventually happen. They have insane chemistry, pretty much being made for each other, fated to be together. But yeah, this is the only Akito pairing I truly like in a romantic sense. As a canonpilled person, along with my personal sexuality headcanons, it's just the most and pretty much only natural romantic relationship for either of them... to me! (But I'm always right.) Anyways, I'll try to not bring up the romance part much. They have a great dynamic and relationship, and I already talked about it in multiple of my past essays. Even though it's "simple", and some people may find a regular relationship boring, it's just... a very natural relationship, already formed and established by the time the game's story starts, with their most important development happening in the Vivid BAD SQUAD main story itself. They are partners, but they are also each other's best friends. While there is a distinction between partner and best friend (seen in how An considers Haruka her best friend even now, despite also being partners with Kohane; and how Arata was upset at Souma for being called his "best friend"), I would say Akito and Touya are also best friends. They are everything to each other, the most important person to each other, and so on. Blah blah... You're the best partner I could ask for; I want to stand shoulder to shoulder with him for years to come; I'm never gonna team up with anyone other than you!... all that jazz! They want to be together so badly; stay with each other forever. The one and only partner they want to be with; completely irreplaceable; forever together. Never separate. They're crazy.

(I'll take the chance to talk about both An and Ken-san here, since... Ken-san has no other card illustration that he appears in, lol.) Akito and An have a fun platonic dynamic, I really like when they interact. Their bickering and competitiveness and the silly situations they get into are quite fun; they're both dumb as bricks, and it leads to funny moments, like their English classes together. However, it's absolutely ass romantically. It's just not good. To me, that's a gay man and a lesbian. The best I can accept is them trying dating in middle school when they were still figuring themselves out, and breaking up immediately because they realized they're homosexual. It's canonically established that they wouldn't be partners; neither was interested in being each other's partner, they never tried to be partners because they really didn't want to; though they were fine with working together to surpass RAD WEEKEND, since their interests aligned. They simply aren't interested in each other beyond friends that work together, and they are both a lot more focused on their respective partner (and being gay about them). It's just not a logical relationship, honestly. Either way. In short, it's my favorite platonic Akito relationship after Akito and Touya, but I just can't view it romantically in any way ever. It's extremely forced, and you have to actively ignore parts of canon or making up things (whether it's AUs, mischaracterizing, or simply changing canon), to make it work. On the other hand, there's Ken-san. Akito's relationship with Ken-san is really good. He's a big inspiration to Akito, and the one who gave him the dream of surpassing RAD WEEKEND, and so Akito really admires him, and is so thankful for everything that Ken-san did for him and contributed to his life. He's pretty much like a father figure to Akito, the one he couldn't really find in his own father. It's a very sweet relationship... BURN MY SOUL is legendary, really recommend reading it.

(^ This is literally the only card that features only Akito and Kohane... and Akito isn't even shown in full... and this card's from July 2022... that's how bad the state of Akito and Kohane's content together is.) Akito and Kohane is... a relationship that is barely developed. They genuinely barely get content together. Their interactions are kept to a minimum, and there isn't any flavor to them. It's a pretty bland relationship... so a romantic relationship is simply unfathomable; it's utterly forced and unnatural, and most of the time out of character. This pairing relies on mischaracterization and making up content or ignoring canon to make it work. It thrives on delusions. It's very forced, honestly. When even An and Touya, who historically hardly interacted in any way, and didn't get a meaningful conversation until Whip the wimp girl!!, now have more content than you, it's just... so dire. There is nothing in this relationship. Even Mafuyu's aquarium has more content than them. They literally only have their confrontations during Vivid BAD SQUAD main story, Akito barking at her because he thought she was half-hearted, and then her later standing up for herself and proving her resolve during her performance. And perhaps throwaway lines in various events, like Kohane telling Akito that she considers him a friend and will keep working with him during Find A Way Out, or Akito praising her after her solo performance during Kick it up a notch. And that's pretty much it. That's their most meaningful interactions in event stories... but I suppose that is more than enough food for some people? ... However, extreme hate aside, I would like to see them get a meaningful interaction eventually, just like An and Touya did. I expected it to happen in Rekindle the flame, and yet... the most they got is three lines; a "blink and you'll miss it" interaction. Either way, I think their relationship has potential. It could be a fun dynamic, considering their characters and personalities. I would like to see them deepen their friendship... that's really all I can say about them. May you get actual, meaningful content together, one day.

Akito and KAITO have a pretty funny relationship. Akito barely respected KAITO at first when they met in STRAY BAD DOG, finding him to be a man that couldn't really be that good at music due to how carefree and unserious he was, but KAITO turned out to be very skilled, teaching Akito a lesson that he shouldn't judge people by their appearance... despite making that same mistake with Kohane previously... and even though he hates being judged, himself, too... this is what I mean when I say that Akito slowly learns with each event and interaction. KAITO also appears in both THE POWER OF UNITY and Rekindle the flame, where he gives advice to Akito and shows him that, sometimes, the simplest answer is the solution; contrasting with Akito usually missing the big picture due to focusing on something (he's a quite stubborn boy). Akito starts slowly warming up to KAITO with time, realizing that, even though KAITO annoys him, and is very carefree and quirky, he gives good advice... occasionally. KAITO's actually my favorite Virtual Singer, and the VBS version is especifically my favorite KAITO in Project Sekai, so I'm quite happy that he interacts with my favorite character often. As an extra note, the area conversation between KAITO and Akito that came with Rekindle the flame was hilarious; I recommend checking it out. Overbearing, cheerful dog trying to get that grumpy cat to go along with him... so fun.

Akito's relationship with the Kagamine twins is fun... they're like his little siblings. He plays soccer with them and teaches them things like a big brother would. It's pretty cute. I really like Akito's FES card story, where Akito gets thrown into his Fragment Sekai forcefully and loses his memories, and the Kagamines follow him while he recklessly pushes forward, despite not remembering anything about himself at all. When he finally recovers his memories after recalling the words his partner and teammates told him during STRAY BAD DOG, the sandstorm clears up, and the Kagamines jump at him, happy that he's back to normal. This makes him burst out laughing, genuinely smiling alongside them. It was a really cute moment. There's also BREAK DOWN THE WALL, Vivid BAD SQUAD's World Link event, where the Kagamines explore the new Street Sekai area alongside Akito. I liked how they kept praising him and telling him that he's so cool for how far he has come and everything he has accomplished, since it's not something that just anybody would be able to do. This makes Akito compliment himself, for once, now able to accept his feelings and be kinder to himself. He's a cool guy, truly. A fun fact I quite like is that, canonically, the Kagamines manifested in the Street Sekai after Akito and Touya met for the first time... they're pretty much the physical representation of Akito and Touya's partnership. They were so crazy about each other and felt such a deep connection right off the bat that they spawned the Virtual Singers whose very concept is being two halves of a whole and being inseparable and always together. Which is kind of insane. The Kagamines are pretty good and fun... I like them. They bring out the big brother side out of Akito.

Similar to KAITO, VBS Luka is a pretty carefree and airheaded character. Although she interacts with him less than KAITO does, her interactions with Akito are pretty fun. The fact the Virtual Singers that have been in his unit events so far have been the carefree ones is funny, since they're pretty much the opposite of him, who's so reckless and stubborn. They provide a contrast to his character and also show him that people shouldn't be judged by their personality and appearance, since they're both quite talented despite how they act. When it comes to her interactions with Akito... she's not very good with expressing her thoughts, as the advice she tried to give to Akito during BURN MY SOUL was quite incomprehensible; but through her singing she was able to give Akito the advice she wanted to give him, which I quite like. Communicating through music... so nice. Her advice was vital for Akito to release his emotions and accept himself, so I'm very glad about this. I also liked how worried she was about Akito when he got into a fight with others during Find A Way Out, immediately rushing to Touya to call for help. Like a worried big sister... Truthfully, I don't have that much to say about Akito and Luka's relationship, but I felt I should add her because she has been in two of his five unit event focuses (the other three being KAITO). I like her dynamic with him because of the opposite personalities, so I would enjoy if she gets more interactions with him in the future.

Finally, there is Akito's sister, Ena. They didn't have the best relationship at the start of the game, but it has since warmed up a bit... although they still bicker like any pair of siblings would. I feel like they're the most realistic and relatable depiction of siblings out of all of the ones in the game. I quite like them. Something I particularly like is that they're quite similar, something that they probably hate (haha): from their taste in food, with both of them liking cheesecakes and pancakes and hating carrots; to their resolve in achieving their dreams despite their lack of skill and talent. They both have something that they want to improve and excel at, inspired by their own family members: with Ena giving the push to Akito to actually try music, despite his own doubts on whether he could take it seriously and dedicate his life to it; while Ena was inspired by their father and his work to pursue art, too. The main difference, however, is that Akito found someone (Ken-san) that motivated him to not drop his dream, teaching him to listen to his heart and do what he wanted to do; while Ena did not have such a motivational figure, and the one that was supposed to lead and support her (her own father) instead told her to give up on it and act like a terrible father figure, effectively ruining her life for a handful of years. I find the Shinonome siblings' relationship quite interesting in how, despite their hardships and bickering, they still support and watch over each other — the support and care that they couldn't find in their own father, who was supposed to guide and protect them, and instead sort of neglected them and even made their life worse, especially in Ena's case. There's a lot more things I could say about them but, basically, I like them both a lot. They're both in my top 3 characters, and they have a very interesting relationship: with each other, with their parents, and with other people, too. It's very interesting to think about their similarities, and the parallels in their storylines... they both need therapy I think.

To finish off this section, I would like to talk about some minor Akito relationships that I feel didn't warrant their own section, but that I still quite like: Tsukasa Tenma — They have a pretty funny dynamic and there is always some situation going on when they are both involved. I enjoy when they are in events together (which is actually an unpopular opinion for... many reasons, though I understand why others don't like it). What I like about them is that they're actually very similar people; it's sort of like, their core is the same but the personality varies. And their personalities clash despite being quite similar. I would actually like for them to get a slightly more serious event together because of that, although their silly shenanigans are fun too. Mizuki Akiyama — Similar to Tsukasa, they have a funny dynamic, with Mizuki often teasing Akito and calling him "otouto-kun" (little bro). They don't interact in events as often as Akito does with Tsukasa, however, but they still get into fun situations, like in The Gentleman Thief's Thrilling White Day!? and their chocolate factory visit turning into helping Tsukasa with his acting role. As Ena's little brother, considering how close Mizuki and Ena are, they have a quite interesting relationship. Would enjoy seeing them in events more. Airi Momoi — Despite technically having been acquainted for a while now, since Airi and Ena have known each other since little, Akito and Airi don't interact that often? Which is a shame. They are actually very similar characters (with Chase my IDEAL IDOL! being for Airi very close to the development Akito got in BURN MY SOUL), and it would be nice to see their actual interactions together. Something like a cat event would be nice... (personal wish) Nene Kusanagi — Pretty fun; it's funny how Nene is intimidated by Akito and how he changes between good boy personality and his actual personality. They're classmates now so they'll probably get into situations together more often. I hope they get more events together; Close game/OFFLINE and The Best Picture Wrap! were both quite fun.

Also, here is some relationships that I'd like to see happen eventually and/or for them to get more content together with Akito: Shiho Hinomori — I think they'd make a pretty fun duo; the interactions Shiho has had with Akito so far were entertaining (such as teasing him for being afraid of the zombie wolf disguise during Scream!? Welcome to the Wolf Forest!), and seeing that they're similar people, it could make for a fun event. As a personal wish, I would like to see Akito try playing Shiho's bass... bassist Akito is a dream of mine. It will happen. I believe in it. Mafuyu Asahina — Technically they've already been in a few events together, but their interactions weren't that deep... Considering they both have the "good child" facade thing, it could be entertaining to see what would happen if they were put in an event together where they genuinely interact. It's fun to think about. She and Akito are my favorite characters, so I would like for them to get content together eventually...! Although I mention just these two, I would like for Akito to interact with pretty much everyone that he hasn't interacted with yet; let him make new friends! I want to see new and fun interactions!! The recent mixed event Work Out and FLY! Muscle Training! was pretty good, since he interacted with Haruka, who he hadn't really interacted with before; and also, before that, with Honami in Rise as ONE!, leading to fun interactions with dogs.

4. Showing off a bit

To end this post, I'd like to show off a bit my Akito stuff:

This is my favorite custom profile. It's actually animated but Tumblr posts only allow one video per post so... yeah. Oh well. I'm pretty bad at custom profiles, but I put a lot of effort into this one and I'm quite happy with how it looks!!

My current Akito Character Rank... he reached 90 right on his birthday. I'm very happy...!

My highest Akito Kizuna Rank. Is this any surprise? Hopefully they hit 55 by the end of the year. My goal is to get Touya to CR66 and then their Kizuna Rank to 66 for that sweet Akitouya stamp.

And finally, my Akito lim card collection. (It's all of them!!) Eventually I'll MR all his birthday cards to MR5, I promise... when I have lots of spare pink fragments.

5. Conclusion

And that's it for the post! I love you Akito. You're such a wonderful and special character. I would die for you. Stop being mean to me please. Happy birthday, my beautiful son!! : ) Anyways, thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed this. It's a quite lighthearted post this time, to celebrate my favorite character's birthday. I will probably write an actual essay sometime soon, so look forward to that!!

[fooltofancy]

okay she's finished i'm not allowed to touch her any more.

[mainalias]

thinking about compiling screenshots of golden/silver age batman exclusively calling dick his ward to combat the allegations that it was “initially a father-child relationship”

[deoidesign]

.

[stuckinapril]

i think i officially set my sights on a therapist and i'll be contacting her very soon?? therapy was legitimately not on my 2024 bingo card (or in the cards for me at all) but here we are????

[serach-bat-asher]

i feel like a lot for me is clicking and i just can't with the AZ world anymore. the response to the p*ger thing has been balls to the walls insane

[horsemage]

I think we should bring back basic etiquette lessons such as shutting the fuck up when you’re watching a movie in a group that is not exclusively your friend group 🙂

[loumauve]

I snapped today at work, and by snapped I mean I politely commented on a help desk ticket by summing up an mess of an (type of) issue that's come up for at least the fourth time in the 2+ months I've been managing user accounts, and asked the person responsible to fix it (himself for once) because last time I fixed his mess-up it took me two whole days to work out the details with at least four other colleagues from different departments and I really don't want to do it again. there's other shit that needs doing, I've been working 10+ hour days for most of this week already, so I need to cut down not add on more.

(good thing tho - at least we managed to fix the issue where the dataset of a newer employee got mixed up with another one of the same name and therefore wasn't able to apply for any of the access/accounts she needed. technically not entirely my area but it does impact us not being allowed to create an account for her so I figured I might as well track that issue down. took three days and at least three other people, but hey - it should all work out now. yay for that)

[piplupod]

it makes me laugh a little bc i was so scared of showing my crocheted isopod to the group bc these women are all in their 60s-80s and they've been knitting for most of their lives so they're all way more advanced than I am, and my isopod turned out swell but it is a tad wonky, the shell plates are not perfectly lined up etc etc

so i was scared they were going to react to it like "ohh isn't that neat :)" sort of patronizing when u can tell they think smth is darling in the same way a child's drawing is darling fsdjkl, but NO !!

THEY WERE ALL SO IMPRESSED. like genuinely in awe and delighted by this little critter HFDSFJKL ?? i think it's because they don't make plushie type of things basically ever, they just make clothing type items (i wish i could show yall some of the sweaters these women have made, some of them are absolutely STUNNING), so the isopod was just so much different from what they're used to seeing maybe? and that's why they thought it was so cool?

I DUNNO they just made me bring it out again every time a new person came into the room to join us the day i brought it JFDSJKL and then they'd all pass it around again and fawn over it and i was just so confused and ridiculously pleased bc i'd been so afraid to show it before 😭

[kenobihater]

ok, so in more than blood, there's luke, leia, cal, boba pops in and out, a certain someone will temporarily bunk with the crew for long enough to get returned to their family, i've written a bit for ANOTHER character who joins up but doesn't swear the resol'nare, and i just now had a BIGBRAIN idea that will make the crew feel more balanced and add some compelling conflict. that said, i genuinely do NOT know how i'm gonna fit five permanent residents plus obi-wan and cody for a total of seven, AND two temporary residents (boba and the other character). also, the bigbrain idea i had would require me to engage with a mid piece of media that i have zero interest in besides this one character in order to get a grasp of their motivations, even if i'll greatly alter the direction their life takes as an adult.

truly idk how many fuckin traumatized children i can fit on this goddamned ship and it's beginning to feel crowded and like i'll be juggling far too many characters to do them all justice. luke, leia, and cal are non-negotiable crew members, and i'm leaning towards the character i just had a breakthrough about becoming a permanent fixture. boba is like an honorary member i think at this point, bc he's quite independent, and the temporary member will only appear briefly, but the one who doesn't swear the resol'nare i'm beginning to think i should leave to their canon storyline to avoid character overload, and perhaps switch the concept of them not swearing the tenants to the new character that i'm really considering bc i think the decision to not convert could thematically fit either of them.

i am AWARE this is vague as hell bc i don't want anyone to get their hopes up about certain characters appearing and then just not doing that. the more i think it through via writing this post, the more i'm leaning towards removing that one character i originally had not swearing the tenants bc dear god it's getting comedic how many strays the tanos are acquiring at this point 💀 four feels more manageable than five, especially bc luke and leia aren't even talking during this fic even tho i do try and give them some personality. so, two young characters and the main pairing feels doable, i guess? i'm feeling less overwhelmed now that i've typed this up but still a bit clownish when considering how ambitious this stupid fic is 😭

[merkerlerspeaks]

*exhibits symptoms of disorders you have been diagnosed with and just so happen to also be depression symptoms, but isnt actually depressed*

People: Hmm I diagnose you with depression

[spaceradars]

not to blame everything on someone else but the pandemic truly made me forget how to study. i have never been the same ever since i finished my 2019 university year.

[cass-cc]

.

[tkbrokkoli]

:O

[undefeatednils]

Super exhausting week. Tomorrow will be a bit better. Monday will be bad again. Then calm for two days. thankfully. Also I ordered a new phone, which will probably arrive on Tuesday or Wednesday. Gonna need to transfer stuff over, hopefully that'll go smoothly.

Some extra thoughts that are yearning in the tags. Sorry y'all, feel free to skip/ignore/whatever. I need to yell.