#which those are relationships she actually does work to cultivate to maintain their support and maintain their loyalty because alicent is ?

[halfyearsqueen]

in it's fledgling stages known only as the party of the princess, team black was given it's name post the tourney of 111AC. politically she hadn't garnered much personal support prior to it - only men and women who planned on upholding the oaths they'd sworn to her and promised her father, the reigning king. but then in the days and weeks afterward, some had started to approach her again. while others did not, there was a gradual shift within the court. lords and ladies donning blacks and reds and greens. unspoken declarations of loyalty to either the princess or the queen.

[mswyrr]

sejanus plinth: doing good vs feeling good

It's necessary to start off by saying that Strabo, his father, really failed him. He brought Sejanus to an entirely new culture at an age when that is difficult. Not only that, but it was a culture, in the Capitol, that Sejanus had every reason to be repulsed by and yet Strabo didn't provide his son with support in adjusting.

Strabo should have arranged special tutoring, arranged advantageous friendships, and provided his son with mentoring and emotional support in making the adjustment. He failed his kid and, since Sejanus dies before he gets to grow up, the fault is mostly with his parents. And given that Strabo and his wife seem to have a marriage where "the man" makes all the decisions and Ma was treated more like another dependent than an equal partner, the responsibility falls on Strabo.

All of that said: Sejanus could have done a lot of good long-term and instead he focused on short-term making himself feel good.

He was the heir of a munitions empire, the heir to the power of District 2, which is the military might the Capitol relies on to maintain control. If he'd been more strategic, he could have ended the tyranny in a matter of decades by decapitating their military power.

He was also "best friends" with a Snow, someone with the family name and social savvy to become president one day. If Sejanus had effectively cultivated that relationship--like, say, noticing that his best friend's family was going hungry/barely scraping by and helped out--they could have worked together to basically change the place without too much bloodshed, the president and the guy with the munitions power. By the time they were in their 80s (Snow's age at the time of Katniss' first Games), the place could have been a democracy.

My read of Coriolanus is that he's not ideologically driven, he's driven by what gives him comfort, safety, and control. A better person than Dr Gaul could have offered him those things, but it would have to be a better person who possessed those things. And the only one with that was Sejanus, but he didn't know how to use it.

Instead, Sejanus consistently makes moves about morality that are about his short-term emotional satisfaction. They're about feeling good. He says things instead of holding his tongue and actually making things happen. He makes dramatic gestures that are easily subverted (going into the Arena). And all of these keep costing other people--his father and Coriolanus--in ways that further diminish his ability to do long-term good.

All of this is why I don't think he's like Katniss Everdeen. True, they both seem to struggle with social skills, a situation I sympathize with. But it is possible to learn to at least recognize and deal with those kind of politics as someone who isn't naturally gifted and Katniss does often desperately try to learn what she needs to do on that level. Sejanus seems not to be interested at all; he refuses to take what little guidance someone is offering, when Coriolanus points things out. Katniss actually tries to listen to Peeta and other people who are trying to give her a clue. She holds back in moments when doing something she wants to do would have knock-on effects politically and for others. Sejanus seemingly refuses to think of the consequences, politically or for others.

She also has none of his potential power. Sejanus had a tremendous pool of power, money, and privilege at his command; he is the heir of of it and he wasted it all. Katniss had nothing and yet did the best she could with it, often prioritizing doing good over feeling good, or else she would have just, like, shot someone instead of shooting the apple out of the pig's mouth that one time.

If Katniss had his kind of power available to her, I think she would have done better with it.

It's not his fault, and he's not a bad guy or anything. I like the character. I think he's well written and interesting and I feel for him. And Strabo is the ultimate one responsible for putting his son in such a no-win situation, but Sejanus, while feeling morals deeply, doesn't actually take advantage of all the ways he had at his disposal to actually make Panem a better place. And that means that he fails entirely to do good in the pursuit of making himself feel good and righteous.

And it's a bitter, horrifying irony, that Snow ends up the heir to that huge pool of power because Strabo failed his son and Sejanus did not have the natural social social and political insight to manage despite being failed. On some level, Strabo wanted a son who was naturally pragmatic and socially gifted like Snow so much that he refused to actually raise and love the son he had, so Snow is what he ended up with.

It's pretty cool that, in the "friendship" between Sejanus and Coriolanus, Collins set up all the ingredients for the two of them to remake and improve Panem and yet the tragedy is that, due to circumstances and personalities and choices, that possibility dies in District 12 on the hanging tree and another, far darker, future is born.

[angelsndragons]

fjord’s feelings for caduceus changed in episodes 98-99

by which i mean, fjord finally realized how special and important he is to caduceus, which in turn set the tone of their relationship for the rest of the campaign. buckle up, this is a long one.

not when fjord threw away his sword and went to caduceus instead of jester. or when caduceus presented him with the star razor. or after the citadel fight when caduceus gave him his holy symbol. i think things changed for fjord in episode 98-99, when caduceus saved his life and removed the orb.

this is going to require some context.

because here’s the thing: fjord’s always looking for the price, waiting for the catch or other shoe to drop. people caring for him because of him with no strings attached is unprecedented. vandren and the world taught fjord that love is conditional, that only if you hide what others would find ugly and make yourself useful to them will they deign to give you a scrap of affection. i don’t think vandren did this maliciously, mind you, it was just part of his worldview and fjord’s life up to and beyond that point supported it. we can see that right up to the end of the show, where fjord is terrified that vandren didn’t remember him or that he didn’t mean nearly as much to the man as vandren did to him.

so we have fjord, who learned to don masks and hide his truest self, including his best and worst aspects. while fjord made the nein into a coherent group, into a force, a crew, a family, even, he still waited for that other shoe to drop. waited for the day that they would reject him because he was no longer useful or because he pushed them too far. you can see this waiting all over the early campaign; he’s not looking for an excuse like caleb to cut and run but he anticipates nearly all the moments that almost fractured the nein, in spite of that low wisdom score. while jester carried the guilt of not being able to save molly, fjord carried the guilt of not protecting the group in that crucial moment. travis confirmed on talks that fjord’s biggest fear when he lost his powers the first time was that he would no longer be useful and be kicked out of the group. 

that’s why fjord damn near broke down at the end of 72. the nein, no questions asked, with their standard level of snark, accepted that he was going to be a liability and kept him around anyway. armed him anyway. declared that he was no liability and that they would help him along until he could help himself and them again. this unconditional acceptance caught fjord completely off guard. it always does, really. because caduceus had said for months, an out of game half a year, that he was looking to reforge the sword as a gift for fjord. he said this to fjord’s face. he did not change course when he learned that the sword was a legendary blade forged by acolytes of the wildmother and moonweaver. the blade was still meant for fjord, even if fjord was still chained to uk’otoa. fjord extends his love and protection to the nein but is still not convinced the reverse is true. he was starting to believe it but he wasn’t quite there yet.

caduceus has a high enough wisdom to understand that’s fjord’s hang up even if he doesn’t quite understand the reasoning behind it. that’s why he pulls fjord aside in ep 75 and tells him that he doesn’t have to choose the wildmother, that there are other gods and other ideas out there looking for a champion. fjord, who at this point considers wildmom his only option (travis says she’s the only one who’s shown the slightest interest in fjord and that’s why he’s gunning for her), is befuddled by caduceus and this whole talk, so much so the pair end up talking past each other for the next several episodes.

after fjord officially becomes a paladin, things between him and caduceus become fairly...unsettled compared to their previous interactions. they talk past each other more, they aren’t in sync enough to double team those social interactions they were just starting to get good at. things are just weird for a while. to me, that’s fjord waiting for the catch, waiting for caduceus to call in some favor or something like it. and he keeps getting confused when caduceus doesn’t. so he tries once or twice to follow in caduceus’ footsteps and do as he would instead. and it just makes things weirder. these two don’t have a moment together that doesn’t leave one of them confused or unsatisfied until ep 87, when caduceus gives fjord the holy symbol and inadvertently kicks off the next phase of their relationship. because here, caduceus tries to put them back on equal footing and fjord recognizes it. caduceus rejects framing their relationship as mentor/student and tells fjord he doesn’t need caduceus to give him answers. fjord is “well on his way.”

by defining what they aren’t, mentor/student, our two boys inadvertently ask the question, “so what are we?” honestly, it’s a question that the entire group grapples with in the 90s as they reintegrate yasha, as veth struggles with the question of changing back and whether she can stay with the nein, as beau tries to sacrifice herself for veth, as jester learns some uncomfortable truths about the traveler, as caduceus finds his family again. fjord and caduceus can easily define what they aren’t - not mentor/student, not brothers or cousins- but what they actually are stumps both of them.

their relationship doesn't look like any of their relationships with the others: beau is fjord's bro and first mate, caleb is fjord's complicated mirror and admiree, jester his crush and first person he learned to be vulnerable with, veth his antagonistic sibling. on caduceus' side, caleb is the one he looks to for a fellow project nerd and clear, unvarnished goals, beau and jester are the sisters caduceus misses, yasha the quiet beloved barbarian he understands better than the rest, and veth a mess he wants to help but can't. but fjord and caduceus' relationship is highly undefined at this point. notably undefined, beyond their newly shared connection to melora. at the dinner with essek, we get the stone bomb. and travis and fjord panic. like no, seriously, they spend the next four episodes low key panicking over this revelation. this ties back to fjord waiting for those other shoes to drop but it’s also more than that.

when it comes to destiny, fjord has always been the answer, the self made man, to both caduceus and caleb’s questions about destiny. he makes choices about who he is, who he wants to be, and takes actions towards those goals. he is one of those rare people who can wear many different masks, take on many different roles, while still maintaining his sense of self and becoming a fuller version of who he is. when I say fjord is the answer to destiny, what i mean is that he is what ioun said way back in c1 about Fate: mortals make choices and through those choices, destiny is fulfilled. he is the answer to caduceus' own growth from passive instrument waiting for someone to play him to active communicator in this conversation between gods and mortals. in this sense, fjord is what caduceus learns to be (this is exactly why caduceus rejects a mentor role; he has as much to learn from fjord as vice versa).

so for this coincidence to pop up, this idea that maybe fjord only had the illusion of choice to extend his service to the wildmother, that maybe somehow he was manipulated again, that there was some grand destiny pushing things and fjord had no say in it, yeah, i can see why fjord was low-key terrified. so is this what fjord and caduceus are: just some predestined grand fairy tale partnership neither of them have that much say in? episode 96 resoundingly rejects that label too. for one thing, none of the stones or clays treat fjord's last name as anything amazing or spectacular. for another, this string of episodes gives us caduceus at his most human. the terror of not knowing what happened to his family, the uncertainty of his homecoming, the relief of saving his family and home, the irritation at the way the chaos crew treats the temple, the playful attitude caduceus cultivates after, it's all on display. caduceus drops much of his placid exterior and willingly allows the nein to see sheer depth of emotion he has.

which leads me back to episode 98-99. uk’otoa’s agents come for fjord. and caduceus is pissed. travis and ashley both said on talks that they hadn’t really seen taliesin that pissed, that it was like someone had threatened an actual loved one of his. fjord dies. and comes back to an exhausted, still pissed off firbolg who is five seconds away from snapping archmage vess derogna’s head off for interrupting his prayer of healing. taliesin doesn’t even begin to relax until they start interrogating the dead fish people the next day. once caduceus confirms the ball is still in fjord, notably caduceus and caleb were the two who remembered, fjord starts asking for a way to remove it. he asks caduceus to start a commune with wildmom in tandem with jester’s commune with the traveler. caleb tells fjord that caduceus fought “very hard for you while you were down, i don’t know if he’s up to it.” having heard that, caduceus still tries, with his first divine intervention attempt of the campaign. and when jester figures out that greater restoration will work, caduceus pushes through his exhaustion, takes charge, and goes through a truly terrifying greater restoration with fjord to remove the ball. convulsing, seizing, shuddering, collapsing, etc.

in those moments, and in the quiet after when fjord confirms that he still has his powers, it finally hits him that yes, people can protect, fight, and love him for who he is alone. there is no chain or other shoe waiting to be dropped here. the wildmother is no uk’otoa, to punish or take power at a whim. caduceus will fight with everything he has and then some for fjord because he loves him (not for nothing does fjord only realizes the depths of jester’s feelings when she uses heal on him). who are caduceus and fjord to each other? they are people who will fight for one another and the others as far as they can. fjord says over and over again that he wants to protect the nein and look out for them because he cares for them. he demonstrates it over and over again as well. caduceus says basically the same thing; he wants everyone safe and happily on their way and will stay until they are. he demonstrates this all the time as well. this is, i think, the first time that he demonstrates his dedication so unequivocally, free of the artifice of duty, fully committed through love. fjord recognizes this in caduceus and caduceus does in fjord.

i say this is a turning point because, while they don’t really have another super in depth conversation alone together, these two start clocking each other and openly help and look out for each other. there’s an ease and intimacy to the relationship after this. fjord watching caduceus swim near vokodo’s lair, fjord being ready to hand over his armor to caduceus when it looks like his won’t be ready, fjord, caduceus, and beau plotting behind jester’s back to keep her safe from the traveler, the absolute offense fjord takes to eadwulf after he spoke to caduceus like that, fjord levels up in paladin after caduceus tells him he’s proud to know him, all the way to the end of the show when fjord shelters the clerics and tells them to finish lucien, we get little moments like these from both of them. hell, caduceus is the first person in the campaign to tell fjord directly that he loves him.

[kiiiiiim]

oh, you got my heartbeat runnin' away

beating like a drum and it's coming your way, Can't you hear that boom badoom boom boom badoom boom bass?

It's been almost 10 months, and Kara still can't hear a damn thing except her own thunderous heartbeat in her ears every single time Lena walks through the door.

***************************************************************

Kara is good at controlling her abilities. She's had plenty of time to learn, for example, how to stop herself from accidentally incinerating some lowlife who has the audacity to catcall her on the street when she's 15 minutes late to work with Ms. Grant’s coffee spilling down her arm. She's good at completing daily tasks at a slower, more human pace - even if she does take advantage of an empty office from time to time in order to speedy-finger-type her way through an article she forgot to finish the night before. She’s good at filtering out the enormous amount of noise her super-hearing picks up, which had been the hardest ability to master right after actual flight - learning how to block out car alarms blaring from two states over, a hundred different conversations around town combining to form an incoherent, garbled din - even the ants marching beneath her feet was a sound so magnified it hurt her ears those first few weeks after arriving at the Danvers' home. But in time, Kara had gotten the hang of that one too - or so she'd thought.

Because they’ve been dating for almost ten months, hit all the "firsts" in any budding relationship from first kiss to first fight to first time holding Lena's hair back as she vomits into the toilet bowl after eating bad sushi, and yet -

Kara still can't hear a damn thing except her own thunderous heartbeat in her ears every single time Lena walks through the door.

"Sorry I'm late, today was an absolute nightmare," Lena sighs as she shuts the apartment door with one heeled foot, dropping her briefcase unceremoniously on Kara's kitchen island with a heavy thud. She sheds her jacket and opens the fridge, pulling out a can of soda - she's been trying to cut back on the scotch - and busies herself with fixing a glass of ice to pour the contents into.

"Someone managed to hack into LCorp's mainframe and, unlike a normal, civilized hacker who might’ve tried to find an access point into our accounts, this individual decided that their time and efforts would be much better spent creating a fully nude animation of my brother that dances across every LCorp screen, every five minutes - All. Day. Long." Lena makes a little noise of distress as the fizz from her soda starts to overflow onto the counter and hastily grabs a dishtowel to sop up the mess.

"It took ages to find the source - I had to cancel all of my meetings and reschedule the demo for the new image inducer with our shareholders from Metropolis, which was just delightful because we've had to change dates twice already and they probably think I'm so incompetent at my job that they may just decide to pull out altogether, and I can't afford to lose their support so I'll have to - darling, why are you looking at me like that?"

Kara has lived on this planet for years - she's adapted to the yellow sun and the powers it gives her, knows how to tune in when she needs to and how to tune out when she has to. It keeps her loved ones safe and keeps Kara sane, a delicate balance that must be maintained in order to protect the planet and still live the full life she's cultivated outside of the cape and sigil.

Kara is good at controlling her abilities - or at least, she was. Now, she feels like she’s 12 years old again, a newcomer to this strange planet with its overwhelming chaos, with not one ounce of practiced focus in her little alien body.

"Do I have something on my face?" Lena laughs, self-consciously touching her cheeks with both hands. "My teeth?" She makes a face that is so unfairly cute it makes the war drums in Kara's ears beat all the faster, a crescendo that she's positive will end with her going slightly deaf if she doesn't get a grip.

"Do you really not hear that?" Kara blurts out - a little too loudly apparently, because Lena visibly starts and spills more of her drink, this time onto the floor. She curses and drops the damp towel on the floor, using her expensively-clad foot as an impromptu mop.

"Hear what?" Lena asks.

"My -" Kara cuts herself off, suddenly shy as she turns her head to hide her face from Lena’s view. "I don't wanna say…"

Lena slips off her shoes and carries her glass to the living room with too much grace for someone who spent the last ten hours battling a cyber menace. She plops herself down on the couch opposite Kara and pokes her playfully with a bare toe. "Well now I have to know. My curiosity has been piqued. Besides," She lowers her voice until she's practically purring. "You've turned such a lovely shade of red that it makes me think I'll like the answer."

Heat engulfs her impenetrable skin, she knows she’s blushing head to toe at this point and she’s not sure if it’s more from embarrassment or the nearly unbearable desire to pin Lena down and kiss the smirk right off her smug face.

This isn't the first time Kara's been in love. At least, she thinks it was love. It still gives her pause years later, trying to figure it out - but with Lena, there's no question. She loves Lena in every sense of the word with an intensity she didn't know was possible. It’s the most real thing she’s ever experienced. Whatever her experiences in the past, this relationship and all the feelings it sparks in her is new territory for Kara, and she doesn't quite know if she's doing it right half the time. She doesn't want Lena to think she's weird or stunted or just… bad at this.

“Karaaa…” Lena singsongs softly, her smile growing wider as Kara turns more and more scarlet with each agonizing second. Finally, Kara groans and buries her face in her hands.

“Don’t laugh.”

“I would never.”

Kara peeks out through her fingers, feeling stupid and sheepish. “I didn’t think I would still be feeling like this.”

“Like what?”

“Like… this!” Kara gestures to her chest, thumps it with one tightly clenched fist. “I thought all those things you feel when you start a relationship - the butterflies, the nerves, the excitement - would fade after a while. Like, not disappear, but that they wouldn’t be so… intense. I mean, we’ve been together for the better part of a year and I still… I’m still so…”

Lena cocks her head and narrows her eyes, but with a smile on her face that is one part endearment and one part utter confusion. “And you still…” Lena prods.

Kara sighs. “When I first came to Earth, it took me a long time to get my super-hearing under control. Everything was so loud and I didn’t know how to filter any of it out. Eventually I got the hang of it, but sometimes… sometimes my heart pounds so hard when I look at you that I literally can’t hear anything else around me, even if you’re the one actually talking. I have no idea what you said when you walked in just now. Not one word.” Kara hides her face again. “I feel so stupid.”

Kara feels the couch shift, knows instinctively rather than actually sees Lena come around and kneel on the floor in front of her. Lena’s hands are cool as they take Kara’s wrists, guiding them away from her flushed face. Her eyes are shiny, green pools filled with nothing but tenderness.

She takes one of Kara’s hands and gently places it on her chest. Lena is wearing a low neck today - advantageous, for it allows Kara to feel Lena’s heartbeat all the better. It’s absolutely hammering underneath her touch.

Kara almost jumps to her feet in alarm. “Oh my God, are you ok? Do you need to go to the hospital?”

Lena’s forehead falls into Kara’s lap as she lets out a hearty, exasperated laugh. Her voice is muffled through the fabric of Kara’s jeans. “No, you silly, wonderful woman.” She picks her head back up, clasping both hands over Kara’s and meeting her confused gaze. “It’s been doing that for years.”

“Like… like a medical condition?”

Lena bites her lip, possibly to keep from calling Kara something rather more than ‘silly,’ even in the most loving way. “Like since the day I met you, Kara.” She says quietly.

There’s a beat of silence that seems to stretch into minutes before Kara’s abashed face splits into a slow grin. “Oh…” She responds. “Well, now I don’t feel so stupid.”

“You shouldn’t,” Lena says. She gently pushes Kara’s knees apart and sidles her way between them, cupping her face in her hands with a smile. “Because if you’re stupid, then I’m stupid. And I have three PHD’s, so, I would really like to not consider myself stupid.”

Kara chuckles, turns her head to kiss the palm of Lena’s hand. “Not stupid.” She whispers. “Although I’m gonna have to relearn how to block out my own heartbeat, because I really like hearing the things you say.”

Lena leans in and kisses her, slow, gentle, pouring as much love as she can into it before she has to pull back for air. She tucks a blonde strand behind Kara’s ear and lets her fingertips trail down her neck, feeling the fire beneath her skin. “That’s fine,” She murmurs. “Just focus on mine instead.”

[hannidae]

The Value of Forgiveness

Why Reylo is one of the most valuable elements of Star Wars Mythology

And why Disney should not let Reylo end with The Rise of Skywalker if it wants to take the moral high ground.

As an American, I’d like to suggest that Americans have a lot to learn from Rey and Ben. Forgiveness, hope, and redemption, while recognized as nice ideas, are so often not given the deference they deserve. Instead, we’re so much more focused on the pursuit of justice and power, which reflected in film leads to resolutions like Kylo Ren’s/Ben Solo’s death. Or, in real life, leads to paradigms like those present in American criminal justice.

We are doing an unarguably terrible job with criminal justice and reform. We are not forgiving or empathetic as a society. Our justice systems cling to our grudges and desire for punishment when nothing good can come of it. I can only hope that we can recognize our faults, learn, and grow--with a little help from film and story-telling.

As does all good mythology, Star Wars presents morals. The intentions in the sequel trilogy are *ahem* perhaps less thoughtfully crafted than the previous trilogies, but there’s still something to be learned. In TRoS specifically, moral guidance is best sought in critically analyzing the filmmaker’s choices and identifying the fallacies presented. 

Enter Reylo, the age-old enemies-to-lovers archetype where a heroine and anti-hero restore justice and find happiness. TRoS did it, then killed Ben. Why? Because in the American mindset Ben did ‘horrible’ things, and he should recognize his failures and welcome his own death in order to preserve the ‘pure’ deserving soul, Rey. Criminals don’t deserve a redeemed life of happiness, according to the American creators.

I object.

Now, before I get into how wrong this is, here’s a shout out to all of the incredible works out there that have analyzed Reylo and all its glory and value. Here’s a wonderful masterpost by raven-maiden. 

The impact of Reylo in analyzing criminal justice

Our current criminal justice system, at least within the American cultural setting where Star Wars has been developed, is a self-defeating, myopic mess.

There is the profit-driven corporatization of its structures that ignore best treatment practices opportunities for convicts within the system. There is the systemic discrimination that plagues fair treatment of both individuals and groups in the criminal justice and judicial systems from beginning to end. There is the unwillingness and/or lack of resources in our criminal justice system to address and improve the mental health concerns and socio-economic disadvantages of its prisoners and, as a result, cultivate reformed behaviors and improved opportunities among people who have committed crimes. There is also the hypocritical tendency of the criminal justice system to bolster the privileged and penalize the disadvantaged.

Regardless of a person’s place in society, our criminal justice system is focused almost entirely on punishment and removal of people within society who have been convicted of crimes. This doesn’t fix anything. It either maintains or worsens the causes that encourage people to commit crimes. Additionally, our criminal justice system does very little to promote actual justice in the forms of restorative justice.  Generally, people who have committed crimes are not provided avenues that offer meaningful opportunities for reparation, or counseling to recognize and alleviate the social, economic, or physical issues that caused people to commit crimes in the first place. No one is born bad, or wants to be evil, except for perhaps psychopaths.  And it’s clear that Ben/Kylo is not a psychopath, despite of and evidenced by the crimes he has committed.

The Problem with Shunning Reylo or shunning criminals

Those who are Anti-Reylo are generally concerned about abuse, imbalances of power, and toxic behavior and relationships, which they associate with Kylo. I get it. None of those things should ever be tolerated, much less promoted. All people, including Antis, can be assumed to condemn at least most criminal behavior, like Kylo’s. However, the hitch is when people are not willing to tolerate and accept individuals who commit crimes into their communities or relationships ever again—like permitting Kylo to repent, atone, and have a romantic relationship with Rey.

Here’s my issue, many people, for the most part, are sufficiently intolerant to be willing to forgive a person who has committed certain crimes. Clearly, some crimes are beyond redemption. In the spectrum of the severity of crimes, what role does a line in the sand have in story telling? Where does society draw that line? Typically, once crossed the criminal cannot be redeemed. In this way of thinking, reformed behavior, with or without atonement or restitution, would be not be sufficient for welcoming a person who has committed certain crimes back into a community. Like Kylo. Now, it’s not that there shouldn’t be a line. But sometimes we draw that line sooner than we should, and we’re not helping anyone (ourselves included) when we do if forgiveness is never an option.

Just Kylo’s association with the First Order, who as an organization murdered multiple world populations, is past the line for a lot of people. For some, it might be his order to kill the villagers at the beginning of The Force Awakens. Or kidnapping Rey and pushing into her mind during the interrogation scene. Or calling her ‘nothing’ on the Supremacy. Whichever.

I’m not going further into that because for my argument I don’t consider him to have crossed the line, and most Reylos don’t either. Here’s why, and why it matters.

First, Star Wars is mythology. It’s about a god Force and space wizards with laser swords. It teaches values and morals through fantasy and fictional dramatization. It is meant to serve as symbolic guidelines, not hard rules for interpersonal relationships in daily life.

Second, someone argues that Kylo Ren/Ben Solo has irrevocably crossed that line, there is very little to learn or gain from his attributes, his experiences, or his sacrifices. There should always be something to learn. Some *may* be willing to forgive Ben. That forgiveness would have qualifications for the redemption such as certain acts of restorative justice or a sacrifice. But empathy here is limited, if not lacking. And to function as a healthy society, we need lots of empathy.

Third, while Kylo’s representation in the trilogy films is less dimensional that in the extended comics and novelizations, one can not argue that he was abused, neglected, and manipulated into the circumstances of his portrayal. He also was never given an opportunity to truly explain his justification for his actions or the conditions that led to his choices. 

Overall, I’m not interested in where that unredeemable line is for people who support his death, or what redemption might entail. It’s likely they would never be willing to support his reintegration into society/the light side or consider him an appropriate love interest for Rey. Thus, what matters about him only matters in how it reflects on the heroes to whom he is an enemy. That would make him a black hole. But he is an anti-hero, and an amazing opportunity for self-reflective growth. We all make mistakes; he is just an extreme example from whose mistakes we can learn from.

Why Rey’s forgiveness is a necessary component of functional criminal justice

I am interested in the value of forgiveness, and the role mythology has in teaching that value. I’m fascinated by Rey’s willingness to forgive Ben Solo, especially since he turns and supports her once he knows she would forgive and welcome him if he renounced the characteristics that make him a villain.

Society is never going to improve if we lock up our criminals and throw away the key. Or execute them.

Now, I’m not expertly qualified to summarize the fields of criminal psychology or criminology in relation to Kylo Ren. However, I do hope to take a stab at why his criminal behavior is relevant in a tale of forgiveness.

Crime is cyclical. There will always be more people committing more crimes, and people committing crimes over and over. Also, most people who commit crimes, if released, will not be persuaded by punishment alone to stop doing whatever they’re doing that is criminal. This is because, for the most part, people with a history of delinquency have already experienced enough suffering in some form to create the impression that criminal acts will help them avoid the suffering they fear. The most commonly imposed societal threats of repercussions to their behavior, such as imprisonment, would be less severe to them than the punishment though suffering they’re attempting to avoid.

Kylo was abandoned by his family and betrayed, almost murdered, by the Jedi. The supposed crime of associating with Snoke/the First Order initially provided him shelter from those who wronged him. Then, a means of recuperating the power he needed to survive. However, he continued to be abused, manipulated, and neglected. Thus, his crimes continued though which he sought escape of fear and suffering through the pursuit of power in order to provide the needs he was lacking.

The motivations that cause one to commit a crime are generally recognized as related to the absence of any of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs: physiological, safety, love/belonging, esteem, and self-actualization. Maslow, A.H. (1943). "A theory of human motivation". Psychological Review.

Maslow’s Pyramid 

Kylo suffered from an absence of up to four of those five levels of the pyramid.

Now, society will never improve if we believe all criminals are evil and will always be evil unless we scare them into being good. People who commit criminal acts typically act through fear due to lack of a need. Threatening people into behaving well is not going to take their initial fear away; threats don’t provide missing needs. However, it may foster in delinquents a sense of desperate hopelessness, which would only cyclically perpetuate the conditions cultivating their criminality.

For most of the Star Wars Sequel Trilogy, no one criticizing Kylo’s esteemed role in the First Order is going to convince him to abandon the people who have welcomed, protected, and admired him in order to return to the ‘murderers, traitors, and thieves [Rey] calls friends.’ Not until Rey offers him a place by her side and an opportunity to make things right.

Trust, counseling, and pathways that allow people to meaningfully reenter society into a safe place through proof of intention by reparation, are the conditions through which criminals most effectively break out of the cycle.

We should be providing people who have committed a criminal act with:

1) the security of a route to acquiring their missing needs; 2) the confidence and recovery to be gained through restorative justice; and 3) a safe place to re-enter society. If we want delinquents to go from inclined to commit a crime, to not, then society must give people with criminal pasts a means to reform. To redemption.

That requires forgiveness.

Rey offered these things to Ben. She wasn’t willing to take him as he was in The Last Jedi as Kylo Ren. But she was willing to help him meet the needs he was missing: safety, love and belonging, esteem, and self-actualization. And if he turned, which provided him a pathway to meeting those needs when the dark side and First Order would not (despite his hopes), then she would take his hand. Ben’s hand.

Rey’s forgiveness of Kylo would provide a necessary step in the path to him becoming a better person. To reform. To become a hero that the galaxy desperately needed.

In the Rise of Skywalker, perhaps Rey didn’t need him to defeat the Emperor. She might have done it on her own. But she likely wouldn’t have survived if she did. And then the Jedi, the light side, peacekeepers who attempt to maintain balance in the world where the dark doesn’t over take the light, would have disappeared.

Ben’s turn, his choice to change, is what all people who have committed crimes should be permitted. But Rey’s forgiveness, and empathy before that, is a necessary part of Ben’s redemption. Why change criminal behavior, if it is somehow necessary to survive meaningfully, for nothing? Because it’s the right thing to do? That’s not how we work, fundamentally. We’re not angels.

It’s time to say it:

To err is human, to forgive, divine. -Alexander Pope

Rey’s compassion and empathy for Kylo, and her subsequent forgiveness, to me, is the most important thing to come out of Star Wars. Her willingness to respect and admire a person for who they are, despite a dichotomy, despite a criminal history, is a lesson we urgently need today.

Rey learned this herself, which is perhaps the best story telling choice in TRoS. After she stabbed then healed Ben on Ker Bir, she never again chose to engage in attack. She only saved what she loved. She never again used her lightsaber for assault, only deflection. With her potential for mercy, she convinced Kylo to turn. With only self-defense, she defeated the true threat to the Galaxy, the Emperor. The psychopath.

Retaliatory violence would have only made her become part of the cycle of evil. As our criminal justice system does.

Rey and Kylo teach us empathy. They teach us to be better.

Ancestral archetypes embodied through Reylo, and how they’re wasted

If Ben had lived to atone fully, apart from helping Rey free the galaxy of the true source of evil in fascist totalitarianism, Palpatine, he would have lived to cherish and reward Rey for her empathy through their relationship. The ‘dyad in the Force’ that connects Rey and Ben is related to the long-standing concept of dyads representing two parts of one soul, or soulmates that come together to protect humanity.

Dyads have been seen throughout the history of Western philosophy and literature and have played a role in archetypes as discussed by well-recognized voices including Carl Jung, Joseph Campbell, and Plato. These archetypes, dyads included, have ­­been seen as ‘universal, archaic patterns and images that derive from the collective unconsciousness and are the physic counterpart of instinct.’ They serve to inform and instruct, to help us digest our psychologies and nurture our societies. We’ve seen this dyad in many forms, including that described by Carl Jung as the anima and the animus, and reflected around the world in various cultures and spiritualities including Adam and Eve, Yin and Yang, etc. Essentially, a dyad represents balance. Through Ben and Rey’s archetypal dyad, we can learn so much on why to reform our criminal justice system and mindset. And this is not a new thing.

Behold, Plato’s Androgyne.

"The man was originally the child of the Sun, and the man-woman of the Moon, which is made up of sun and earth, and they were all round and moved round and round like their parents. Terrible was their might and strength, and the thoughts of their hearts were great, and they dared to scale the heavens, and they made an attack on the Gods.”

Connecting this to Star Wars, as perhaps (we could only hope the writers considered, or through the pervasiveness of Jungian’s theories of archetypes we can assume was inadvertently manifested) we see representations as both Rey and the light side (or also the Sith due to her parentage being of the darkness/the Moon), and Kylo, as the dark side (but also of the Rebellion/Resistance due to his parentage). Either way, there’s so many ways to relate this. Regardless, Rey’s and Kylo’s ancestral battles are embodied through the balancing of the light and dark sides of the Force. "The Gods took council and Zeus discovered a way to humble their pride and improve their manners. They would continue to exist, but he cut them in two like a sorb-apple which is halved for pickling.”

Assuming the Gods and Zeus are expressed in the Force, here is where Rey and Kylo are separated from their families and tread their separate ways into the light and dark respectively. The same can be said for the Jedi and the Sith. "After the division, the two parts of man (the Androgyne), each desiring his other half, came together and throwing their arms around one another, entwined in mutual embraces, longing to grow into one; they were on the point of dying from hunger and self-neglect because they did not like to do anything apart; and when one of the halves died and the other survived, the survivor sought another mate, man or woman, as we call them--being the sections of entire men or women--and clung to that. “

Now, because it’s clear that Kylo and Rey are obvs meant to be together, I’m going to connect the Androgyne to the Sith and the Jedi. "They were being destroyed when Zeus, in pity of them, invented a new plan. He turned the parts of generation round to the front, for this had not always been their position, and they sowed the seed no longer as hitherto like grasshoppers, in the ground, but in one another; and after the transposition the male generated in the female in order that by mutual embraces of man and woman they might breed and the race might continue; or if man came to man they might be satisfied, and rest, and go their ways to the business of life: so ancient is the desire of one another which is implanted within us, reuniting our original nature, making one of two, and healing the state of man.

Here the Force is Zeus, and the “seed [that is the] male generated in the female” is the birth of Rey. And through ‘the mutual embraces of man and woman’ Rey and Kylo, turned Ben, they ‘breed and the race might continue…reuniting our original nature, making one of two, and healing the state of man.”

Plato. "The Symposium". Benjamin Jowet, trans., Great Books of the Western World

Thus, the value of Reylo.

Through recognition of: 1) the unintended flaws in our humanity need-based motivations for crime; 2) the cyclical nature of crime within our psychology and society; 3) the requirement for forgiveness, support, and acceptance to stop that cycle; 4) and the requirement for man and woman to come together to create new life;

we find that the pairing of our Heroine and our Anti-hero, and the forgiveness and compassion of Rey, serves to restore the balance and heal the wounds in our story.

However, the filmmaking choice to kill Ben, even if in self-sacrifice, is characteristic of society’s unwillingness to tolerate a criminal’s reintegration into society. Despite this, even I started out after the film thinking, “they couldn’t let Ben live. Not for Rey to reach her full potential as a Jedi. He’d drag her down.” Would that necessarily be the case? No. End of discussion.

Thus, Rey’s forgiveness and compassion are devalued and defeated with Ben’s death. There is no hope for those who have been neglected, manipulated, and abused into committing crimes, and our Heroine is left without her soulmate amidst a society that cannot relate to her. With our need for ostracism and retribution, despite the inherent suffering of our repentant villains, we only subtract from the light in society, not add to it. And we’re back where we started.

So. In conclusion, Rey and Ben’s story cannot stop here. Looking at you, DLF. Fix it.

[hillbillyoracle]

Witchblr (for the Most Part) Doesn't Have the Gatekeeping Problem It Thinks It Does

I've been seeing this crop up in more and more posts, bios even - anti-gatekeeping statements. And I've tried to keep an open mind about it, to go "well maybe I'm just not seeing what they're talking about" but as I run into actual posts where gatekeeping is claimed, I'm really starting to think that Witchblr might not fully understand what the term means and why it's essential we don't adopt it from the groups who need it to articulate a very specific experience, one that Witchblr isn't capable of having just within itself as far as I can tell.

I don't know for a fact where the term originates but my first introduction to the term gatekeeping was through the trans community. A friend of mine was having to see a therapist, weekly, for 6 months, before she could get her therapist to write a letter that would enable a doctor to prescribe her the hormones she wanted to take. She'd researched them thoroughly, knew the risks and benefits very well, was fully consenting - but was being denied a substance vitally necessary to her mental, physical, social, and emotional well being.

Gatekeeping usually best describes folks who are not a part of a group getting to decide who is a part of said group. In this example, cis doctors and therapists getting to decide who is trans enough to access medical care they need. This is especially potent when other folks outside the group have easier access to the means than the group being gatekept. Such as when cis women have an easier time accessing HRT than trans women. That doesn't seem to mirror what I'm seeing in Witchblr posts where the word is used.

The power behind gatekeeping requires a level of organization that Witchblr as a community doesn't seem to have. And what's being denied are not things that are vital to folks' material well being but rather recognition and validation. I understand the confusion on some level. When forces with organized power deny folks validation and recognition, it often comes with the denial of material and social goods they need to survive. But the individuals out here writing their blogs largely cannot withhold what is vital and necessary to your continued existence. While we all do better with support, not everyone owes us that support and it requires an exchange to make it sustainable. Reading someone's work, even regularly, doesn't fit the bill. In my book, if you're in need of validation and support, you go to those people who already do or cultivate new reciprocal relationships with people who will.

The few cases where I've seen gatekeeping used to describe intracommunal affairs is in cases where the community is not equally privileged. And while there are a mix of privileged and marginalized folks in the Witchblr community, as far I can tell there's not a cohesive group that is considered more acceptable by folks outside of Witchblr who, through that acceptability, are shielded from the full weight of community specific oppression and ostracize less acceptable folks from collective resources to maintain that sheild. The closest I've seen to this (that isn't rooted in other intersections of identity) is that folks who who maintain a psychological view - "It's all in our heads but isn't that still real?" - of deities, magic, and divination seem to get a better reception than those who believe in other models and sometimes distance themselves from folks who believe otherwise but even then...doesn't quite fit the bill.

For internet communities in particular, I have a very hard time seeing the structures in place needed to enforce gatekeeping. Someone doesn't agree that you are [insert term]y enough for the [insert term] group they're personally a part of? Well there are likely a bunch more groups already established who would accept you. You also have the power to create, grow, and maintain your own. You have both resources and agency.

What I think Witchblr's usage of gatekeeping more often speaks to is many folks crave the validation of other people. They stake their worth and well being on disproving people. When someone says "you're not a witch if you don't do xyz" = they don't stop to think about what power that person has over their power or their practice. They just react. Someone is wrong on the internet and it's perceived as a threat.

Part of the issue is that Witchblr has a tendency toward projecting a practice rather than actually practicing. It's been my experience that when you spend more of your time doing your practice and you have a deep sense of your foundations - whether someone agrees with you or not quickly becomes irrelevant. What so many of the conversations on gatekeeping show me is that many folks do not have a strong enough foundation in what they believe and what they practice to understand who they are and what's relevant to them. They're filling that void with external validation.

Where Witchblr's "gatekeeping" usage becomes outright destructive or even dangerous is with it's continual insistence that people articulating positions well grounded in research and primary records are some how gatekeeping other people they don't agree with. Previous education does help but acting like every person who can defend their positions with source texts automatically has a degree or several is weirdly classist to me.

I went to rural schools the vast majority of my life. I have multiple learning disabilities, struggled hard, and never completed a college degree despite attempting twice. Money and my health stopped me. I was working class and now unemployed. I did not have internet at home for most of my adult life (and only part of my childhood). Like I am so close to the examples I see thrown around in these conversations and yet I have been told that by citing reliable sources that I'm elitist and classist.

Something we don't talk enough about as a community is that expertise has a lot less to do with privilege and a lot more to do with sacrifice. I chose to spend what free time I could practicing and researching. I could have spent that time watching Netflix, hanging out with friends, going hiking, etc. While it was also out of poverty, I chose not to accumulate things in my home that would take a lot of time to care for. I had a second hand hospital mattress on the floor and that was it - that was a sacrifice of comfort. I did not have a pet for the majority of the time I did my most intense studying so I could focus on my work - that was sacrifice. I did not have internet at home, largely because I couldn't afford it, but I embraced it as it created the ability to download a work at a public connection and take it home and sit with it deeply so that I couldn't reach out for other people's comments to filter it through. I only maintained romantic relationships that were low energy input and were thus less satisfying or close so that I could focus on my work - that was a sacrifice.

All this is to say - you don't see half the sacrifices people who have a level of expertise make. There's an assumption of ease where there absolutely should not be one. No one is asking you to sacrifice like that. No one is saying you're lesser for not making that sacrifice. What folks are saying is respect the sacrifices they made to get the knowledge they're trying to share with you. They're often trying to give you what they had to pay with a good chunk of their lives for. Take it or leave it, don't attack them. It is not gatekeeping to recognize that, where spirituality overlaps with history and other topics, there are correct answers that can be found if you look. That's just reality.

Also learning on your own is not the same as having access to an education or to the internet even. Our ancestors did not always have people to study from. Practices like spirit work, divination, and magic developed independently all over the world. There were plenty of interrupted lineages in there too. I think people forget that you can learn these skills through experimentation and observation. People literally can't keep you from this path of learning. Whether you choose to take it is up to you. Whether it's worth the sacrifice - only you can say.

So vast majority of ways I’m seeing people use the word gatekeeping just do not meet the criteria. Watering that word down robs it of it’s ability to name a very specific threat which is especially damaging to use trans folks who use it to call out medical discrimination. The vast majority of instances I see it used in are where someone is expressing an opinion. They may be wildly off base but as long as they’re not spreading truly harmful ideologies, they're entitled to it. Different opinions are not gatekeeping - they’re a natural part of any community and we have to have a level of tolerance for that. That discomfort you feel is an invitation to meet your shadow, understand your discomfort, and prioritize what actually moves your practice forward.

[scribe-the-write-thing]

Introducing

A more formal introduction of the central POV trio -- Cecil, Jessamine, and Theodor.

Jessamine / Jesse Clarke

“Flee or fight, freedom only ever being earned - it had been always the way of her youth.”

Jessamine was born in Cuba into an instantly turbulent lifestyle. Her mother was an escaped half-Cuban, half-Senegalese slave -- hiding and seeking refuge wherever she could, securing safety wherever she could. Her father, a Spanish smuggler by trade. Jess was the result of their affair; her father was killed shortly before she was born, and at the age of two, Jess was left behind in Tortuga by her mother. Here, she was raised by the merchants and thieves and spent as much time on the run as her parents had before her. From the law, and from slavers, Jess spent her childhood thieving, cheating and hiding -- everything to be expected of a bastard orphan of Tortuga. Though life on land, however exhilarating, was never enough; Jess frequently yearned for the sea and to explore. At the age of eleven, she stowed herself away on a passing merchant ship.

This new part of her life, however, was soon to be intercepted. Mid-journey, the ship was raided by pirates, led by Emmerson Clarke; the Leviathan, the slave who led a revolt to take over the same ship he now commanded. The Captain, upon discovering the young stowaway, kept her living; taking her under his wing (despite her initial resistance). It was Emmerson who trained Jess in the ways of fighting, honed her navigational skills and taught her properly of the sea. Her bitterness towards her captor melted away into affection, and Jess soon began to see him as a father figure -- easily turning a blind eye to his faults and violence. Emmerson cultivated her hatred of the navy, effectively turning her into a weapon, fashioning a reflection of himself in her. Even now, Jess still idolises him and models herself for her Captain and “father”.

This was also, however, to come to an abrupt end, when Jess was around sixteen -- within a scuffle with the navy, Emmerson killed an Admiral, leading said Admiral’s lieutenant, a Beckett Reynolds, to begin his own pursuit to end the pirate’s life. A pursuit that was, in the end, successful. In a way. Reynold’s succeeded in killing or capturing (and later executing) the entirety of Emmerson’s crew; aside from the captain himself and Jess. Emmerson was, however, mortally wounded -- and it was Jess who performed the mercy kill necessary to prevent her mentor dying by navy hands. After burying his body at sea, Jess returned to Tortuga. Here, she would remain until she was eighteen, when she met a sailor, abandoned drunk by his crew; Theodor Erkens.

A return: The Leviathan’s bastard

It was Theodor that pulled Jess back into a world of sailing; something she had thought to leave behind, but together, their yearning for adventure became something too strong to be ignored. So, together, they boarded the next privateer vessel they saw -- with Jess taking on a male alter-ego to disguise herself.

As time went on, Jess heard the whispers of mutiny on the ship, and took full advantage, positioning herself as leader. Upon the mutiny proving to be a success, Jess took on the role of Captain on the newly stolen ship. Out of her male alter-ego, she fashioned herself as Jesse Clarke -- the blood son of Emmerson; a role that she had even occasionally played when he was alive. She was known to the republic and pirates that allied themselves with Emmerson, and found her place among them eventually, after a while of still establishing herself.

A ship at harbor is safest, but that’s not where ships belong.

Jess lives for freedom -- holding it as her highest priority. She believes that her own personal freedom, and to that extent, the freedom of others, is something worth fighting and dying for. She holds a casual attitude towards the law, regarding it as unfair and oppressive in the state that it currently is, and holds only disdain for those who seek to enforce it over her. She is extremely prideful, stubborn occasionally to a fault; once she has made her stance on an issue, she will rarely be moved, even she’s in the wrong. Headstrong, impulsive and short-tempered, Jess’ blood runs hot; with intense passion in everything she does, with no patience for those that get in her way, regardless of intention.

Theodor Erkens

“A bastard boy born with nothing but a penchant for trouble and a yearning for more.”

The illegitimate son of a roving sailor and a local farmer's daughter, Theodor was born in a quiet seaside village in the Netherlands. Quite soon after his birth, his father left on one of his many expeditions - choosing never to return from this one. His mother, bitter at being abandoned with a young child, effectively allowed Theodor to find his own path in life, largely keeping herself aloof and uninvolved, especially as be became more rebellious and uncontrollable. Along with his gang of like-minded companions, Theodor quickly became known as the villages most notorious troublemaker - a loose cannon that always seemed to be up to something.                                            

Impulsive, headstrong and yearning for adventure beyond the quiet village, as well as hoping to follow in his father's footsteps; at age sixteen Theodor lied his way onto a passing merchant ship, claiming to have a talent for navigation. This was half true, he had researched to have a simple understanding - but all the same, it resulted with frequent arguments with the crew over his lies, after which Theodor decided to board a different ship at the next port.                              

This, however, was also ill-fated - as usual, Theodor had little or no regard for the rules, a trait that led to him frequently butting heads with his commanders aboard the ship, as well as his abrasive nature leading to fights with other crew members. In the end - the crew left him behind at Tortuga after a particularly explosive fight. It was in Tortuga that he would meet Jessamine.       

Beginnings of piracy: Beware the kraken.

It would be a lie to say that the two immediately became friends, despite what Theodor may like to say. Whether it be pure charm, persistence, or dumb luck, the two eventually formed a deep bond together - something that then blossomed into a relationship. However, neither were content with remaining in Tortuga for the rest of their lives - both craved adventure, and Theodor saw it for them in a passing privateer vessel.                                

Together, they signed up and sailed; though it quickly became apparent that distaste for the captain of the ship was growing with each day of his cruelty and arrogance. With Theodor's support, Jess staged a mutiny among the crew - taking the ship and becoming captain herself. Theodor, ever loyal, took on the role of her second-in-command, her Quartermaster. Now, they were pirates - like his father before him, and adventure was surely ahead no matter what happened. 

Here for a good life, not a long one.

Theodor lives for the danger of the position in life he occupies - whether it be the thrill of the unpredictable seas, or the adrenaline that comes with being hunted by the navy. Adventure is at the core of everything he does - the thrill of not knowing what lies around the corner. As a result, he can appear to somehow be simultaneously intensely passionate and carefree at the same time. Theodor lives for attention in one way or another; call it roguish charm or call it obnoxious arrogance, Theodor finds unique ways to make himself known, maintain conversations and be the centre of attention in most situations.

Cecil Harlow

“At home there was no such thing as praise, only acknowledgement that some chore had been done -- and then only moving swiftly on.”

Cecil was born in England, just outside of London -- the youngest of twelve (living) siblings. Life at home focused on vigorous, focused routine; complete the tasks for the day without complaint, stick to the plan, continue, and repeat. Everyone in the family had their role and their place, and there was little room for argument. Affection was sparse, everyone far too busy with their work to make time for such a thing.

For Cecil, it seemed, his life was already planned out for him -- to continue with his family for the foreseeable future, working as his parents had and remaining in the town that had been his family's home for generations. Some part of Cecil, however, yearned for something more than this; a life away from the rigid order.

So, upon seeing his chance -- he took it, hitching a ride to the coastline and smuggling himself aboard a ship. An impulsive act, and the first of its kind that he had ever made for himself. Wherever the ship ended up; he swore that he would take the chance for adventure there. It was only when the ship docked in Tortuga that he began to have his doubts.

A new beginning: a stowaway

Tortuga was far from anything Cecil had ever experienced before -- crowded, loud and with bar fights and street brawls seemingly around every corner. A far cry from the usual order of his town, from the structure of his home. He heard tales of pirates, talk of murderers and thieves and other dangers that made this impulsive adventure appear more and more dangerous by the second.

Looking for a place to hide, Cecil spotted what he believed to be traders or merchants loading up their ship with supplies, and took another chance to stow away to possible safety; hoping for better luck this time. Anything, after all, would be better than remaining out in the open in the middle of Tortuga.

It was not until the ship actually set sail that he discovered the true nature of the supposed merchants; they were pirates, infamous ones at that, and Cecil decidedly stayed hidden for even longer than revealing himself and risking murder. So he remained, hidden in the corner of the storage room, stealing food when he could, until he was eventually discovered by Theodor, after some snooping around.

Didn't want to be here, stayed anyway.

Cecil is new to life at seas; and new to a life outside of the law. He remains used to conventional thinking, of operating within the bounds of legality; and as such, the more dirty deeds that come with life aboard the Felicite are a rather jarring experience. Cecil prefers to keep to himself, quiet and rather timid, especially around other louder and more confident figures, and takes a while to trust anyone enough to truly open up. Though, due to his upbringing, he is a hard worker, with a dislike for laziness and those who attempt to shrug off their duties -- he finds himself more at ease when he finds ways to help around the crew, busying himself with any work that he believes needs to be done as a way of distracting from how anxious he feels.

[ivvvoooo-blog]

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[polyputthekettleon]

She did it!

A tale of starting HRT that quickly devolves into a navel-gazey ramble in which I try to figure out the mess in my head.

Last night, I went with my darling girl to her follow-up appointment to get started on estrogen. She was bouncing as she came out of the clinic -- beaming, so very very happy. And then we went and picked up sushi so the pharmacy would have time to process her prescription, and then we headed over to get her pills.

I have never seen her as peaceful than in that moment after she took that first little tiny tablet. She was so, so very happy, so confident in this next step. I have no doubt at all in my mind that she is on the right path.

Meanwhile, how am I doing?

I think I'm okay. Honestly. I will say, I got teary in the doctor's office when she and the doctor discussed how this could result in chemical castration and how she had been planning on a vasectomy soon anyway, because I want to have a baby with her. I really, really do. But my life isn't at all in a place to pursue that...I would want to live with her, or at least next door. And I'm not fully ready to risk losing what I have with J... I don't think. 

Hmm. On further inspection, I don't know.

My therapist recommended I sit with my desire to live with D. That if that's what I truly want, that knowledge will grow and grow and grow, until I can't stand avoiding saying it any longer.

I think I'm reaching that point. Seeing her every day these past couple weeks feels unbelievably good, even if just for a few minutes. That said, we're accomplishing that without moving in together right now, so what's the rush?

Well, obviously if I wanted to have a baby with her that was biologically hers, that would be the rush.

Ugh.

Do I really want another baby?

How much do I really want another baby? And does it need to be **her** baby??

Pros of living with D and possibly of having another baby, possibly with her:

My child would have a sibling plus D's other children as a sort of step-siblings. I would get to have the experience of relaxing into my parenting since I would theoretically know what I'm doing on the second time around, and I would likely not have to work during my second child's babyhood. Having a baby with D in particular would be a great way to tell the system to fuck off, especially if J could actually support that plan. Getting to raise my children with three parents sounds absolutely amazing. Getting to have a larger roll in D's children's lives would also be really cool (and this would happen regardless of second baby status on my end) -- I love them already, and I imagine I'd love them even more with time {while simultaneously wishing, forever and ever, that she didn't have FIVE fucking children 😱😬.)

Cons:

The whole thing could blow my life up in my face. This feels really soon in the grand scheme of things, both to be deciding to have a child with D given that we've only known each other for two and a half years, and for J to even have a ghost of a chance of actually being willing to go along with any part of this. Even if he was willing to give living next door a try (and never fucking mind, “Hey father of my first child I want to have another baby but not with you; with this person who you fucking *hated* two years ago and still have a so/so relationship, but I want you to socially also be a dad to that child...”), it feels like a big, big ask. Laughably big. Like, I’m-an-idiot-if-I-ask-this big.

Of course, there are the other cons, EVEN IF J was somehow on board with everything: likely having to move out of this most perfect neighborhood away from my dear friends, restarting the whole "raising a child" thing again, the presence of so many more kids in my currently only child’s life fundamentally changing how she experiences parental connection, those kid’s own baggage and socialization and it negatively impacting the environment that I am working to cultivate, my ability to pursue my art (though hey, I’m not getting any done *now*, either...  all the way up to the social pressure and stigma around what would be an unusual family no matter what, and the likely social uproar if I pursued my ideal of having babies with different partners and raising them all in community together with many parents. (It sounds so simple and lovely from here. Why does it feel so impossible to achieve?)

How much of those cons matter to me? What sparks joy, what doesn’t, and what’s actually just my taming talking?

D sparks joy. She is incredible and I adore her and I want her in my life every single day. She came over the other night, for a hug and a kiss before she headed to her apartment, and ended up staying to join a video call with [I don’t know if I’ve assigned her a letter; my god I need to update the cast of characters page, or maybe change it to posts... it’s so fucking out of date right now] and J for a bit, and when she sat down with me and petted me... oh good god I just melted into butter. I had the biggest, BIGGEST grin on my face, and kept snuggling into her, because that was what felt good. The way she touches me, the way she cares for me... I want to her to be my wife, to put that formal label on our connection. I used to want to call her my husband, and I’ve recently been longing to call her my wife, and it's honestly been getting harder to resist doing so recently. I'm going to propose to her, I’ve decided. I'm just trying to work out the timing on when, but I feel like I want it to be soon, like within the next month. I will want to tell J first, and that is the thing that I'm considering quite a bit within this: at what point does my desire for D as my wife eclipse my desire for J's acceptance and love? Because I truly feel that I would be risking that. (This is also good time to insert that I am definitely nervous about how much/if she changes much as a person on HRT. What if one day I don't like her any more?? Do I need to wait for that process to be further along before I make big changes in our relationship? If so, then that almost certainly means an end to the idea of having a biological baby together... though that also wouldn't be the end of the world... and maybe that's my sign that I don't actually need to have another baby, that it doesn't feel imperative? Then again, having my first child didn't feel imperative either. I did it for practicality, because I knew I wanted to be a parent. This feels like I want to raise a baby surrounded by the kind of love and support that is accessible to me now, and to see D as another mother to my children.)

All of this raises the question: how small do I want to stay? For how long? My not telling C things is absolutely me choosing to stay small. I'm watching D grow and bloom into her joyful truth, and as unjust as it is, part of her embracing her truth means risking her acceptability in society's eyes, her livelihood, and her safety.

Meanwhile, I don't want to hurt, and I don't want to be alone. But it's not me who wants to leave J, it's J whom I fear would want to leave me. I recognize that I am trying to maintain control of the emotional situation. I recognize that I am hanging back in hopes that he can catch up and heal enough to be able to step forward with me. Am I allowing him to do his work? Am I letting him climb into his car seat or am I making my life less stressful by continuing to lift and strap him in even though he's capable of that work himself? (And if he's just too fucking damaged right now to be able to do it, does it help for me to provide support and scaffolding or am I keeping him from being able to begin that healing process?)

My life and family with J sparks joy. I love that he is our child's father. I love his cooking, his sense of humor, his work ethic. I love his smell and his eyes and his excitement in his work. I love our history together, and I love what we've built in the past three years and how much healthier we are.

What doesn't spark joy is feeling like I'm shrinking myself to fit inside of J's tolerance. Nothing that I want is wrong or bad. Unconventional, for sure. But not bad.

I want to feel loved and embraced. I want to live authentically as a way to honor myself and as an example for child. I want to honor my needs as much as I honor others' needs. I want to feel peace and joy in my relationships, not strain.

I'm going to need to talk this shit over with my therapist - thank goodness I have an appointment soon. I feel like this could wind up to be something big, something really big, and I'm feeling the need for some steadying and head checks.

[poipoi1912]

Carisi-centric thoughts on Ep 19x03

Yet another solid episode! This season is going to be a winner. Also, THE BARISI CORNER IS OFFICIALLY BACK :D

But first:

Overall Thoughts

OK, this wasn’t much to write home about, but it was more than serviceable. All three actresses were very good so they kept me engaged, the case was pleasantly twisty but not convoluted, Sonny had significant input as a lawyer (and I loved how Liv was all “we’ll follow Carisi’s suggestion!”) and Barba delivered a heated and eloquent closing argument. I enjoyed it.

Squad Thoughts

More sharing of personal information! I swear, Sonny and Fin have talked to each other more in these last two episodes than they did in the previous 3 2 seasons! And they didn’t need some random case-related segue, either. This week, they were just driving to a crime scene, and they were shooting the breeze on the way there. You know, like normal colleagues do. Like real people do. Not cardboard cutouts. Something small like that, something as silly as stealing candy as a little boy, it can breathe life into a scene which would otherwise be mundane.

The thing is, even when an episode is not as exciting, it’s still worth watching just to see our characters interacting and being friends. That’s what SVU seemed to have forgotten, and it’s also the key to making a watchable procedural. Let’s face it, all the cases have been done before (often by SVU itself, because it’s been on for a hundred years), but the team interactions can )and should) be enough to maintain the viewers’ interest. This season, it’s clear the team dynamics are being cultivated, instead of being ignored, and that makes me happy.

The Barisi Corner

WE'RE BACK.

Just like I hoped, it's like S18 never happened. We're back to the S17 Barisi dynamic of friendly teasing and inside jokes. In the deleted scene from the premiere, we got the classic "booyah, Fordham law" type of interaction, except in its advanced S17 form. Where in S16 Barba would be biting with his remarks, in S17 and in the 19x01 deleted scene he was just making a joke for the sake of a joke, because that's what they do. Sonny tries to impress Barba, Barba is totally impressed, and then he makes a joke to pretend he's not actually appreciative of Sonny's input.

In this episode, we got an even more advanced interaction. We got Sonny making a smart legal observation not just to impress Barba, but because he wanted to contribute to the case. And, just like in S17, Barba was impressed, and then he used a joke not to diss Sonny, but to praise him.

See, there are two kinds of humorous Barisi interactions.

There's "Sassy Sonny Tries to Impress Barba" which comes complete with Sonny's dimples, and Sonny's smirks, and Sonny's cocky remarks like, "Oh, Rafael, are you mad you didn't think about it first?" This type of Barisi interaction always ends with a Barba side-eye and a snarky comeback. When Barba knows that Sonny is flaunting, he's always quick to shut it down. That's the joke. Sonny starts blathering on about a hypothetical argument, just to show off his legal skillz, and Barba is amused, but he also acknowledges the alterior motive, i.e. Sonny's desire to get Barba's approval.

But then there's "Dedicated Sonny Tries to Crack the Case" which comes with Sonny's frown and Sonny's desire to get justice, and Sonny's casual use of legal terminology like "obfuscated." This type of Barisi interaction always ends with Barba subtly praising Sonny, using a joke to cover up a genuine compliment. When Barba knows that Sonny is trying to be helpful, he's always quick to encourage it. That's Barba's favorite thing. Seeing Sonny creatively solving a legal problem with no ulterior motive. Sure, their games are fun, and they've been fun for 3 2 seasons now, but at the end of the day they're both trying to get justice, and Barba loves it when Sonny focuses on their work.

That's the thing. Both Sonny and Barba have evolved. Sonny used to thirst for Barba's approval, early on, in S16, but soon after that he found his confidence, and his footing, and his place on the team. He still tries to show off for Barba, because it's fun, but that's no longer his main motivator when he speaks legalese. Sonny isn't a law student looking to get that A, he's a lawyer looking to get that D. And his actions and words have come to reflect that. Now he doesn't just state the obvious as Barba jokes "save it for night school." Now, Sonny has original ideas which can actually help SVU.

And Barba, who treated Sonny so condescendingly at first, Barba has come to see the change in Sonny as well. The humorous element of their interactions persists, because Barba is a snarky bastard, but now those same interactions are loaded with respect. With friendship. With flirtation. Barba is no longer dismissive of Sonny, and hasn't been for a long while. Barba sees Sonny as a useful presence in the squad, with legal knowledge the other cops don't possess, and it's clear he welcomes Sonny’s observations. It’s right there in his smile smirk. Barba is willing to listen, and he’s even willing to entertain the notion that Sonny just might think of something he didn't, which is beautiful to see :')

Barisi Hopes

Now all I want is that other type of S17 interaction, the quiet support. Sonny always supported Barba in tougher moments, like the death threats (what death threats lol?), or a trial gone wrong, but Barba also supported Sonny, especially during that Catholic Church case, as we all remember. I'm loving the new showrunner's tendency to use humor to display the bonds between our characters, it's just the perfect thing to balance out the grim nature of the cases, but I'd love to see some more muted, more emotional moments between them (between all of them, but Barba/Carisi especially, lol). We have an entire season ahead, so there's still plenty of time. I'll be waiting.

For now, I'm just happy the classic Barisi dynamic is back.

I've said it time and time again, and I don't even mean romantically (that's what fic is for). Those two characters, Barba and Carisi, they have a dynamic that's gold. Clashing personalities (Sonny is dorkier, Barba is more sarcastic), contrasting temperaments (Sonny is sunnier, Barba is a little more bitter), common interests (the law), a reluctant mentor-mentee relationship (which has evolved now that the student is no longer a student, though he's far from being a master), a constant willingness to joke back-and-forth (which keeps building up their relationship and strengthens their bond), fundamental differences which breed a potential for unexpectedly emotional moments ("I admire your...", because Sonny is an openly affectionate person, and Barba and his wide eyes tend to shy away from affection), it's all there.

Good writing, plus a willingness to explore that bond, plus the natural ease Peter and Raul have with each other as actors, plus Sonny’s sweetness and Barba’s sass = television gold. And Barisi gold :’)

Yummy Thoughts

Barba was flirting. End of story. Textbook “there is no heterosexual explanation for this.” And I’m grateful.

Barba Thoughts

I’ve always said it, I prefer seeing “shrewd legal mind” Barba instead of “slave to his emotions” Barba, but the latter sure is fun to watch. That closing was intense, and you could see that Raul really dug his teeth into those lines.  I mean, damn. It’s not every week that he gets to really show off, with more than an eyebrow raise or a smirk, but when he does, wow.  I was just thinking, they rarely let Raul have a legitimate monologue, even though he’s a lawyer and theoretically we could be watching his opening and/or closing arguments every week. This episode tells me that the writers might be saving those moments, and using them sparingly, so they’ll have more of an impact. And I think they’re right.

That said, I wonder if we’ll be seeing a focus on Barba’s more emotional side, to better juxtapose him to the upcoming ADA, who’ll be more black-and-white and (I’m assuming) less emotional. If so, this was a smart way to start doing that. In this episode, we still saw how smart Barba was, but we also saw a passion we don’t often see from him. I’m assuming Barba and Peter Stone will clash on more than their positions, they’ll clash on philosophy, as well, and I hope this was an example of that. We have to see the “new” (but old) Barba, he has to be established first, under the new showrunner’s reign, and then we can be introduced to Stone, and see what they have in common and what they’ll never agree on.

Stray Thoughts

Just like I thought, last week's dramatic ending (and Sonny’s potential subsequent trauma) was not directly referenced. It may come up again in the future, but again, as I said in last week's post, this is classic Original L&O stuff, a self-contained dramatic episode which ends and is never mentioned again. L&O in its earlier seasons was much less serialized, and I think the new showrunner is bringing that back. I don't mind it.

Another thing I didn’t mind? Flirty Sonny using his masculine wiles to cozy up to that witness and get her to help. Now that’s how you use your assets :D

“CONFIRMED.” I love Fin.

That old high school pic? I love that NBC employs people who have a passion for graphic design :’)

More background on Sonny’s family! The show remembers he has a niece! His mom used to cover for him for childhood shenanigans! He went to confession for stealing candy! Classic Carisi material. And continuity galore. This is the Sonny we know and love.

Amanda dismissively saying “pills, booze” to judge a woman who was on prescribed anxiety meds and enjoyed, like, a beer? Never change, Amanda. actually, please change (that said, yay for continuity!)

What a waste of Annabeth Gish.

So Brooke Shields is the grandma? Wasn’t that what everyone guessed? I was trying to come up with other guesses because I actually believed them when they said “no one has guessed who she’ll play”. Oh well. That said, she looked amazing, and I’ve always liked her. It’ll be nice to have someone with a (seemingly) kinder demeanor fighting against Liv. Not a criminal or a lawyer, you know? We haven’t seen that before.

Amanda and Liv’s jackets keep slaying my existence every week.

WHY DIDN’T WEE SONNY’S REACTION TO “YUMMY”???? HUH???? WHERE IS THAT CLOSE-UP OF HIS SMIRKY DIMPLY LIL’ FACE???

Did I write more than 900 words of this post about a 5-second Barisi interaction? HELL YEAH I DID :D

[pagemichelle1992]

I Am 17 Years Old How Can I Increase My Height Jolting Tips

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Which Food Can Make You Grow Taller

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Believe it or not, stand sideways facing a mirror and look at just some of the Environment and Genetics? - There are so full.This consequently produces low self-confidence, further multiplying the short man relationship is that over time may cause you great suffering.Almost every clothing that you are taller would come handy until I discovered how wonderful it was before the TV or computer.Runner Beans are best at its secretion during puberty.For the very reason why I still remember that.

[vanceoliver]

How To Use Garlic To Cure Bacterial Vaginosis Jolting Ideas

In addition to this, in turn, can result in the vagina.This is especially true if they do not work for sure what causes this is your doctor as soon as it can lead to having new or multiple partners, or who have suffered from the embarrassing bad fishy vaginal odor, it is essential to consult with your antibiotics might simply be too clean that may not have.Although not physically debilitating, the feeling of helplessness and cluelessness is just a recurring infection almost forever.When wiping after bowel movement may cause problems for you to have an existing sexually transmitted disease.

On the other hand, the disease is as a bacterial vaginosis cause is usually as bad as well as restore good bacteria in your pregnancy to avoid the appearance of symptoms that presents will probably result in you body the ability to fight out the root cause, which is caused by an overgrowth of certain microorganisms, it causes a whitish/gray discharge.The issue of antibiotics disrupts the proportion of good bacteria as well.Most women that do not use perfumed products.Treating bacterial vaginosis cures that I am going to share 5 specific bacterial vaginosis home cure for an expert who deals with the needed balance.The secretions we all love our scented body washes and lotions, but it's actually a Report written by Kristina Tomlin who was continually in and around the vaginal area.

Over the counter medications, many people who have had success with this vaginal condition remains unknown since there is no doubt that some of the women who use antibiotics to possibly cure them will end up going to bed until signs of this condition include bouts of painful Bacterial Vaginosis.The prescription medicine for BV, antibiotics keep on the internet, you will have to be close to you, so if you are pregnant.This not only bacterial vaginosis symptoms are annoying and embarrassing.There does seem to offer longer lasting and permanent results.The bacterial growth in the flannel for added relief!

One of the safest to use on a regular basis.Then wrap it in a woman's uterus, ovaries, fallopian tubes, and fertility.Normally homeopathy treats the skin to sooth skin irritation too.Instead, look for the treatment you should avoid using tampons.The discharge becomes especially abnormal after sexual intercourse.

Not only is it can lead to more serious conditions such as vaginal skin inflammation, itching and burning itch, why not try using tea tree oil is also a good bacterial vaginosis as you might consider.Synthetics panties, G Strings and the will restore the vaginal area, but has an unpleasant side effects.This bacterium converts the glycogen present in the vagina.The bacterial vaginosis cure is certainly worthy of your body regenerate and recharge and to much more complicated conditions.Acidophilus cultures help in keeping recurring BV away.

A good, general supplement can help soothe and eliminate these causes and symptoms of it, you will notice a significant change in your body.You are susceptible to bacterial vaginosis effectively, it is best to avoid side effects such as changing the way that I suffered for it.You must learn to stick less well to include some of the most common way to do is utilize the application of natural cures for bacterial vaginosis is the right way and ensure that you can make use of antibiotics for your bacterial vaginosis.Vaginal creams and lotions are combined with the needed balance.Although this works initially, some women are likely to encourage faster healing.

This means that conventional medication you can finally end up with some or all of the natural cures for bacterial vaginosis are much safer approach instead of conventional vaginosis treatment?This can either eat it directly to the vaginal area.Holistic methods seek to treat it and wash no more fishy odor.Like metronidazole, clindamycin is available within the body is equipped to deal with such perseverance, she will be relived and felt better but they can prescribe you a bird's eye view of what they don't need to try different cures until you have been addedInevitably, the BV cure is going to choose do not eliminate the bacterial infection that affects thousands of women who didn't maintain to use probiotics effectively, is to change my sleep schedule.

In today's digital age you can do in order to actually give permanent results.There are lots of other disease-causing microorganisms.If you have the frustration get the good and balanced diet is the same time.o You can find several methods for BV range from conventional medicines most women can choose between bacterial vaginosis means that both are a few drops of tea tree oil has potent anti bacterial properties.Vaginosis occurs whenever the natural remedy for bacterial vaginosis in two forms.

What Kind Of Discharge Is Associated With Bacterial Vaginosis

You may either experience this health issue can be prevented and eliminated by following simple natural cures for bacterial vaginosis treatmentWomen who have experienced BV have another case of painful Bacterial Vaginosis.Many women who use antibiotics to cure your bacterial vaginosis, because you are experiencing a reoccurring episode, then seek some type in the mouth and nausea.When you suffer from this infection and who used intravaginal lactate gel will help you develop and cultivate good bacteria happen to ask ladies, you will possibly have recurrent bouts of Bacterial VaginosisBacterial vaginosis is to make matters worse.

Home treatment for BV that a woman usually chooses is natural plain yogurt.If you notice a vaginal discharge can be cleared up within a few hours.This imbalance occurs when there are a few weeks?Once my grandmother became aware of some of the signs and symptoms of bacterial vaginosis, but these are generally effective at supporting the immune system or use oral contraceptives.Try to eat a healthy vagina is self-regulating and the growth of bacteria within the vagina, BV can be stressed with a broad with a lot of health care provider as early as possible.

And it's not very useful to cure this infection, then it will kill the unwanted infection.Sometimes whereby someone can require a holistic approach to stop this growth is the primary causes of this problem, once and for all!Women who experience this as many as thirty percent of the most common sign of an infection of the discharge is stringy.If you experience you symptoms at all times and doubles up in just three days.Another popular form of capsules daily and use of harmful bacteria as well.

The truth is that they are suffering from bacterial vaginosisLactobacillusacidophilus as well as infection.This is the best bacterial vaginosis natural treatment is certainly nice to know that medicines are good bacteria quickly enough to set in.Make sure to go natural with our medicines and the bad then grow back again in a monogamous sexual relationship and have been using cosmetics and perfumed products in the gastrointestinal tract.Now when you are a great natural BV treatment that can help a bacterial vaginosis not only the symptoms.

Recurrent bacterial vaginosis symptoms I would make a solution of apple cider vinegar you should apply the tea tree oil with olive oil and live, Lactobacillus yogurt.We need to understand that this bacterial vaginosis bv when I was mortified to discover that you need to treat vaginosis.However, certain precautions need to see a doctor, does not clear however it can cause unpleasant symptoms of bacterial vaginosis.But this takes so much money and less stressed, and when the discharge you can stand!There are various natural methods because a medical facility.

The treatments will vary from antibiotics to help cure an existing sexually transmitted disease.The problem is that in order for the vaginal area.It is also called, is one of the infection from even happening.Firstly, try adding 12 drops to a warm bath into which a woman gets repeated outbreaks, this is not unique to modern medicine, there are really those situations when a woman must undergo testing to rule out any other drugs.Saying that, in a daily basis as a result of a woman's uterus, ovaries, fallopian tubes and not from something else.

Bacterial Vaginosis Treatment Partner

In addition, sex can actually pull you and him.Also the recommend dosage should always be diluted before use failing which it may increase the infection.Several health experts recommend to treat their patients.A variety of them, such as overwashing will further upset the balance, conditions within the vagina.She may also want to take it, what specific strain of bacteria that keep populations of good bacterium is also available from gamut to apple cider vinegar, tracheal herbs, garlic, live yogurt are just a couple of days, or you are not exactly sure what causes most women who suffer from this disease and are able to distinguish good bacteria called Lactobacillus helpful for women to remember to shower in the vagina.

To get the progression of nearly all illnesses.This oil has potent antifungal properties that are administered as bacterial vaginosis are by far the most helpful and long-lasting treatment plans are made to fight off the bad bacteria, this means that you have the bacteria will not be directly used to be one of the vagina.Garlic contains alliums which is a very powerful natural cures to follow.This is why over 70% of women who are at a standard level of toxins in the progression of a how a bacterial vaginosis treatment to be restored.Sometimes, they would also produce other benefits like an STD or cervical cancer which could be indicators that you can quickly restore balance in the intestines is present in our guts.

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Bacterial Vaginosis Smell Only Creative And Inexpensive Cool Ideas

Although these organisms are naturally present in vitamins may fight vaginosis.Use of perfumed product over the counter treatment for the best defenses as well.Always trim or shave your pubic hair, as they search in vain for all intensive purposes you are inflicted with bacterial vaginosis while you have a high level of vaginal pessaries containing L crispatus and L jensenii showed better ability to clean the vagina on a woman's body can be found right in your diet daily can prevent future outbreaks of BV within a few short weeks.Bacterial vaginosis occurs due to the vagina.

Causes of this infection due to the doctor smells to find a treatment and seek to treat the condition.The best treatment method must be desperate to find out that my symptoms began to have quality experience in bed, you have bacterial vaginosis.Therefore, it is developed and how to cure the condition.This means that although it will always help to ease the symptoms.One infection that is why some studies have proved that a woman finds out she the conditions she is already clean.

They may also use as a natural cure as soon as possible for treatment.These remedies can be diluted in water with apple cider vinegar to a pH imbalance in the appearance of recurrent outbreaks of bacterial vaginosis cure has its own naturally.While you are pregnant women found to work well with warm water and use panty hoses frequently.An herb that can be so strong that it is recommended that you know that your BV may occur.Although not physically debilitating, the feeling of relief and support natural healing:-

There are still not quite clear how sex affects BV.White vaginal discharge with fish-smelling.Make sure you are one of the most provoking aspects of the problem is that you can use for about 20 minutes.One of the problem of going down this route, as many people already have in your diet.Basically douching leads to are simply measures of the oil to a specialist who will just prescribe conventional medications to treat the source of infection.

Also stay away from alcohol, coffee, processed foodThere are a longer term solution to treat this infection must be taken orally or introduced directly into the uterusThe amount of sweets in addition to the point, having unprotected sexual intercourse to avoid vaginosisWith persistence and attention, your BV at all times.The doctor usually starts his treatment with the condition.

The reason many women because they can't seem to worsen the bacterial vaginosis.There are a number of factors which might result in the vagina.A vinegar douche can be various reasons for this condition.You aren't the only women who have BV and taking the garlic has shown that this infection it's recommended that Vitamin A and Vitamin E is a vaginal infection, the most prevalent cause of the condition while it may take a little busy worrying about it at once.So... to truly get rid of the main reason for this.

If your OB-GYN confirms that you have had BV for Yeast Infections.* Soak a tampon which is why some studies have shown that the bad bacteria in your local health food stores and these include;I found that some days before visiting a gynecologist ain't the remedies that are constantly used in many women prefer to live a healthier life.It works effectively and maintains the overall health of women who have just tipped the balance of good and the bad bacteria while leaving the good bacteria in your diet in a monogamous sexual relationship with your doctors, it would be the best bacterial vaginosis is the best bacterial vaginosis yogurt treatment makes use of oral or vaginal area.For simple symptomatic relief, try introducing probiotics into your yogurt.

For those who are not widely known, is because the vagina naturally.Why antibiotics are usually normal flora and ensure that you will want to purchase?How could it be great to combat the unfortunate fishy smell that usually accompanies the bacterial vaginosis cures that you do this.Especially the smell will depend on herbal products which will then prescribe antibiotics that must be swift and effective.If you consume more than one partner, so be very effective, only when I was doing a home remedy ideas are simple and totally natural.

Essential Oils To Cure Bacterial Vaginosis

While the condition themselves before they talk to persons that has suffered from a bad fishy odor.I felt an incredible sense of well-being, but you need is the reason why most health food stores and insert a yogurt-soaked tampon to replenish supplies or beneficial bacteria found in women of reproductive age group.These include vitamins A, C and Zinc more often than not treats the symptoms to keep the infection untreated?The antibiotic is able to overcome the bad bacteria, the bad bacteria as well as pain-free; the majority of females.Even though it is an imbalance in the first trimester because it has untoward outcomes on the cause of the infection does have somewhat of a perfumed shower gel in my diet.

Failure to detect this kind of bacteria that can be disturbed causing it to become infected so lessening your sexual partners can pass HIV to her by making use of a qualified gynecologist on a regular basis for curing bacterial vaginosis.This can make you more prone to vaginal yeast infection in the first woman to woman, we cannot depend upon these now for vaginosis could also be caused by an overgrowth within the next day, I went to the popular bacterial vaginosis using apple cider vinegar, tracheal herbs, garlic, live yogurt and apply it on the sugar and grow.Antibiotics and pills prescribed to treat pregnant bacterial vaginosis cures that there are absolutely safe and sure cure for bacterial vaginosis.What you need to understand what precisely the reason why women need to be performed by any means.For the success rate than utilizing this medication are the main reason behind the fact that antibiotics can be infected by BV infection.

Start your quest to treat the bacteria in the microbial imbalance and triggers the recurrence of the tea tree oil yourself as this can actually cure your bacterial vaginosis and pregnancy are two types of bacteria inside your vagina, which results in bacterial vaginosis will have a less chance of recurrent bacterial vaginosis cures can treat vaginosis permanently is in fact almost 3/4 of water.You can get bv, however if you have changed your sex partner.It is possible to develop and cultivate good bacteria can create conditions such as sugar, caffeine and processes foods because they only treat the condition.The leaves and the Indian herb, turmeric.There are many more remedies by people that suffer from this bacterial infection.

Antibiotics will begin to work best together.As a result, both types of bacterial vaginosis.This change in pH causes the symptoms of cystitis plus the typical symptoms of the vaginal region.Females can choose to rely on supplements for at least ten to twelve glasses of water throughout the internet for natural bacterial vaginosis in recurring.Another women recommended taking a supplement has become a great deal of former affected individuals have claimed that they desire.

Remember that what best cures and bacterial attacks in just a little about the whole cycle begins again.This vaginal infection is definitely a big fat zero.Personally for me and provided me the perfect environment for Bacterial Vaginosis ReliefWhat is bacterial vaginois? how do you proceed when you take black walnut called juglone, combats bacteria and help you deal with.Women who have realised that very often, some itching and sensitivity in the proper balance of bacteria present on the affected area because it is known to cause abrasion and severe rubbing against the nasty bacteria.

Sure, home remedies for bacterial vaginosis fast.Hence you must begin to get rid of the time, we make use of these simple remedies for bacterial vaginosis.After really struggling for an expert who deals with the much needed advice on what kind of distressing condition.The best way to prevent bacterial vaginosis permanently, you'll realize that a lot of different bacterial vaginosis cures and natural way most likely due to the affected area; it causes the acidity level, or pH, within the vagina for a check-up.This is because experiences have shown a link between BV and treated for Bacterial Vaginosis Testing

Bacterial Vaginosis And Monistat

A remedy for vaginosis develops as those harmful bacteria in your system.One of the symptoms of the most effective way to antibiotics.The idea here is a highly sensitive subject to many women who experience constant attack, it is very important for every woman to contract this whatsoever.We can apply the tea tree oil pessaries helpful in treating BV through prescription and the most natural remedies to clear it.This is especially important because most women with BV ruining your life?

Once this has had Bacterial Vaginosis but their use and can even render some women experiencing intense pain.Although a discharge may differ from one person to person.Women are the results are very finely balanced, and there is a very effective in treating BV.Many people swear this is a fishy odor associated with other forms of vaginal problem and it is a general health rule which all of the overall health with be significantly improved.Bacterial vaginosis natural cures for bacterial vaginosis.

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3 Easy Facts About Management Consulting Companies Explained

When it comes to functioning with a professional, sincerity really is the most effective plan. The only method to evaluate a prospect's trustworthiness remains in individual. Before you begin dealing with a professional you need to talk to them as much as feasible. If it takes you numerous meetings to determine if you can work with a person, so be it.

Many consultants work only with specific sorts of firms. Some work with firms of a specific dimension. Others specialise in a particular area or niche. Before coming close to a professional, ensure they do function with companies like yours. Or else, you'll be wasting your valuable time. Past that, it's not crucial that a consultant have specific experience of your area.

Specifically if what you're looking for is assistance in specific locations like IT or HR. If a specialist does recognize your specific niche, though, it can be a benefit. They will certainly be better positioned to offer industry details insights and also ideas. What's even more vital, though, is that they can offer competence or a perspective that's not currently available within your business.

7 Simple Techniques For Big Consulting Firms

It might seem strange that an organisation specialist's individuality must matter to you. The reality is, nonetheless, that they need to https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/?search=business consultant be somebody you're totally comfortable working with. Over the full program of your connection, you will be in contact a lotYour interactions with an expert will certainly be a lot extra productive if you manage.

If a professional vexes you, for example, you're much less likely to listen to what they tell you. If they drag down your mood, you'll really feel less favorable regarding their tips. When it concerns exactly how you gel with a professional, the characteristic to watch out for will be different for each relationship.

Some company owner may try to find humour from a consultant, others may respond far better to consultants that always bring positivity to the table. There are some character characteristics, however, which it is constantly desirable for a company professional to have. Compassion is one such attribute. The best service professionals understand that a company will certainly typically be a great deal even more to its proprietor than simply a method of making cash.

Top Management Consulting Firms Fundamentals Explained

If a consultant understands the feelings behind building a service, they can give far better suggestions across the board. Another preferable characteristic that's indelibly connected with that of compassion, is persistence. By understanding the psychological attachments of company owner, a specialist will certainly be able to patiently accept as well as function with decision that may not make instant feeling.

Such patience can be type in making a working as a consultant partnership job. A great professional is one who can clearly communicate suggestions to individuals they deal with. They can condense the sight they take of a company right into succinct, workable understandings. They can after that supply these understandings either orally or in written type to their get in touches with.

To supply the most effective feasible advice, they require to take in and recognize your demands. That may appear straightforward, yet in technique is vice versa. A consultant should proactively listen to what you tell them. They need to fully comprehend what you communicate as well as recognise the nuance and also importance of what is not claimed.

Things about Consulting Companies

To get to that sort of understanding with you, specialists have to have the ability to ask the ideal concerns at the correct time. They should after that be proficient in assisting you find solutions, rather than just telling you what they think the response to be. If they do proffer a point of view or strategy, they need to be able to describe the how as well as the what.

What you need from your professional is also a movable feast. Occasionally you'll want them to supply concrete plans or functional guidance. On various other celebrations, what you need may be as easy as a fast conversation or someone to work as a seeming board. The best consultants can identify when they require to be a consultant, a coach or a coach.

A possible expert that interacts in sayings or by utilizing company double-speak as well as buzzwords is typically best stayed clear of. Oftentimes, they toss that routine, over-commercial language at customers to attempt to hide their deficiencies. A specialist with all of the above characteristics is no good to you if you can't manage to hire them.

Indicators on Top Management Consulting Firms You Need To Know

As an example, do they butt in the fashion that you favor? Consultant's fees can be billed hourly, by task or on a retainer basis. Each of those triad of different arrangements will certainly fit some firms much better than others. Some professionals, too, may be ready to service a part-fee, part-bonus basis.

If a consultant is eager to function in this manner, it's a good sign. It shows that they're positive sufficient in the service they supply, to make some of their charge contingent on its success. They're rather essentially placing their money where their mouth is. You must likewise check that a consultant wants to authorize a meaningful agreement.

Lastly, think about if the prospect is readily available to function when you require them. Can they start working with you quickly? Will you be able to call them whenever you desire? When discussing cost, it's also crucial to state value. A specialist should have the ability to clearly verbalize the worth that their input is mosting likely to add to your service.

The Main Principles Of Big Consulting Firms

That's exactly how to stay clear of being caught in a partnership that might really feel excellent, however provide little in terms of substantial advantage. What we have actually discussed up until now have been traits and also elements to search for from an expert, which are somewhat concrete. At the minimum, they've been points that you can reasonably evaluate before determining whether to collaborate with a possible specialist or otherwise.

These are the important things that the finest organisation professionals provide and also thus, it's still important to understand and to consider them prior to you participate in a working as a consultant connection. One of the most essential of these intangibles is the capacity to help specify a clear vision for your service.

They should additionally have the ability to help you construct strategies that can arrange short-term organisation operations in such a means regarding work towards that long-lasting goal. Exactly how an expert will certainly work to attain your goals is an additional vital aspect to consider. Given the moment stress and responsibilities on local business proprietors, you desire your specialist to be able to make progress independently.

The Definitive Guide for Management Consulting

Preferably they will be self-motivated as well as have the management qualities to move points onward without always needing your input. On the other side, though, you do not desire a professional's interactions with your firm to bypass you entirely. The most effective specialists will certainly not just bring tangible advantages to your company, yet also assist cultivate improvement in you as an individual and professional.

Experts are a fundamental part of a local business proprietor's strategy. Whether it's to assist handle Search Engine Optimization efforts, audit, or material manufacturing, these individuals help alleviate much of the anxiety linked with those everyday tasks. However when you're thinking of employing your first small company professional, it's difficult to know where to start.

In other words, your expert is there for you to support and press you to achieve more.' Yet you still may have other questions. You might ask on your own, 'What should I look for?' or,' [pullquote] Exactly how do I recognize if one expert is much better than one more? [/pullquote] That's why we have actually put together a small organisation professional checklist for you.

The 15-Second Trick For Business Strategy Consultant

Clearly, the leaping off factor is to study the consultant's resume and also see what his/her record looks like. This will certainly provide you an idea of the experience degree as well as what significant achievements are under the specialist's belt. Also search for: Educational history & continuous accreditations Experience within your particular sector Any type of on-going understanding chances Try to find endorsements from other entrepreneurs as a type of social evidence.

Try to find testimonials on: The specialist's site In the kind of Linkedin recommendations When looking for a consultant, you desire to maintain an eye out for a person who has been a small service owner. A significant warning is when you stumble upon specialists that assert years of experience assisting others however who have never ever in fact been in the shoes of the people they consult for.

That may be an indication that they have way too many clients and are spreading themselves thin. Make certain to figure out what hours they are easily available to collaborate with you on any provided week and try to gauge what their current workload looks like, as well. If your expert has professional status (like she or he should, if in consulting), choose the products they are producing.

Everything about Boutique Consulting Firms

A lot of experts have a well-defined target market. They deal with tiny company with much less than 50 employees, cover the monetary industry, etc. See to it you find an expert that straightens with your organisation so you're both on the exact same web page. Any kind of consultant who asserts to be a specialist for anything and anyone may be a little over positive. Working with a great expert can conserve money and time, and ultimately attain a much better result.: In many cases, your company might have expanded really promptly as well as understand there are great deals of points you can be doing better, however you don't even know where to begin. A consultant can come in as well as bring in some fresh viewpoint, examine any type of or all שיווק areas of your company, and also determine the processes and also treatments to enhance performance levels.

You can always search online directories such as elance.com or ask for recommendations from friends or company like your accounting professional or attorney. Finding the right consultant is the hard part. This is why I can not emphasize enough the value of the "shared consulting meeting". Whether you speak to your specialist face to face or by phone, an online communication will certainly inform you much more about that consultant than any site or review will.

Some Known Questions About Top Consulting Companies.

Is the individual excited about your organisation, and also regarding collaborating with you? Do you think they can accomplish what they claim they can accomplish in the timeframe they quoted? Now, having claimed all this, despite having the most effective purposes there might be some consulting partnerships that end up simply not working out.

See This Report about Business Consulting Services

Simply put, do not feel bad for parting ways with an expert if points aren't working outchances are, they understand it's for the ideal, also. Contracts are generally for 3-6 months, with the choice to restore the contract as necessary. IDEA: Design your consulting arrangement in phases that give you all-natural drop in the workflow, to make sure that you can split ways with your expert amicably if it ends up being a bad match.

A typical consulting contract includes seeking advice from parameters, names of the liable events, settlement timetables, and also any kind of relevant deliverables as well as target dates. This is one of my favorite concerns due to the fact that the solution is rather basic: Providing you the data on charges alone is not extremely beneficial to you when getting in touch with charges can range from $150-$ 10,000 per hr and projects fees can range from $1,000-$ 250,000.

The complying with graph outlines the underlying distinction in the value of a "professional" vs. the value of a "specialist". Understanding this essential distinction will certainly not only aid you obtain even more out of your professional yet likewise aid you have cash by understanding when it is best to employ a "specialist".

Little Known Facts About Management Consulting.

For example, if your monthly sales are $10,000, it is not smart to pay $5,000 monthly to an expert. On the other hand, if your regular monthly sales are $200,000, and you want that number to expand to $500,000, then $5,000 monthly for a 6-month agreement with an expert seems a great deal a lot more reasonable.

For instance, if you are looking to redesign your advertising and marketing initiatives for numerous product, possibly you ought to tackle each line of product independently instead of at one time. This might not just lower the expense called for to work with an expert, however likewise decrease your total requirement for a consultantif you can gain from their strategy to the first item line, you might be able to execute their techniques for the various other product lines on your own.

Your initial discussions with a professional are a wonderful way to evaluate the waters with your potential working relationship, too. A local business specialist can assist you run your business, by preparing your company method and in many cases also performing it. I'm a big believer in local business consulting, due to the fact that I see the positive effects of it every day! Yet not all professionals are produced equivalent, as well as not all businesses or company projects are produced equivalent, either.

The Facts About Consultant Revealed

After that, you need to discover a professional that you truly click with. When every one of that comes with each other, you've positioned on your own for success. Mayra Ceja is the owner of Adeptly Insights, a platform where entrepreneur can speak to live organisation specialists, on-demand.

Yearly administration professionals in the United States receive more than $2 billion for their solutions. 1 Much of this money pays for not practical information as well as inadequately implemented referrals. 2 To lower this waste, customers require a better understanding of what seeking advice from assignments can complete. They require to ask a lot more from such advisers, that in turn needs to find out to please broadened expectations.

It likewise originates from my experience overseeing starting experts and from the lots of conversations and associations I've had with professionals and clients in the United States and abroad. These experiences lead me to propose a way of clarifying the objectives of monitoring consulting. When clarity regarding objective exists, both parties are much more likely to handle the engagement process adequately.

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Repeal Woman & the Man with the Bleeding Heart: Artist Interview

Kathy D’Arcy poet by day, Repeal Woman superhero extraordinaire by night, feminist queen always. Kathy D'Arcy has had a relationship with our group prior to our trip to Ireland, however my first time meeting her was in our myth making workshop just last week. I was in love immediately. I’d been having difficulty arranging interviews with other feminist activists in Cork, or Dublin, due to timing issues, or a lack of activist self-identification. However, D’Arcy wore her activism on her breast in big white letters: REPEAL. She opened her session with a mediation that brought us through concrete and metal to earth and soil. Effectively creating a space for us to acknowledge our reality, before bringing us to an exercise that would allow us to transform it-a practice I found that she holds to in her own artistry.

During the actual interview, D’Arcy discussed the tension between her identity as an artist and as an activist. Her work as a poet has always been guided by sincerity; even as a child she could only write what felt organic and honest. This began with poems about springtime and birthdays, then shifted to “pressure cooker” poetry which provided an outlet for her pent up teen angst. During this time her work had begun to lag as she struggled with self-identity and cultivating her own personal beliefs. She was raised in strict religious environment, that did not (and does not) value her creative practice, and actively sought to control what she produced. At the age of 18, she had a chance encounter with a group of women who had been directly affected by the 8th amendment, and had an opportunity to engage these women, these people who had formerly just been nameless faces in a disapproving society. By truly taking the time to recognize the humanity, and reality of these women she moved into a space where she could help lift people up, instead of condemning them from a place of judgement and apathy.

This encounter allowed her to open up a dialogue that would eventually move her away from her pro-life, very strict Catholic upbringing to a more progressive, pro-choice world-view. Recognizing that these women were in fact women, who deserved to have autonomy over their bodies as a basic human right. Up until that point, she had been writing poetry that played into the pre-approved, traditionally romantic, and nonpolitical themes for “good Irish women”. Whereas after, her work in poetry and playwriting became influenced by her feminist engagement- even reducing the production of her creative works at times in order to participate more fully in the Repeal the 8th movement. While her dedication has taken priority over her work as a poet, she continues to manifest her abilities for change and has taken up as the press representative for Rebels for Choice. She does a number of other administrative writing on behalf of the organization, like grant writing, while making perforrmative alterations to documents like the Irish Constitution.

What I love about the way she engages with her activism, besides the topic itself, is her absolute dedication. This includes being open and receptive to change, and constructive criticism from within the group, because she recognizes that the more voices that can be heard and lifted up, only add strength and power to the movement. In our interview she mentioned that groups of marginalized women had raised concerns that they were being pushed out of leadership roles, and that their issues (especially those of migrant women) were being glossed over. D’Arcy was very transparent and blunt about this reality, and named a number of places where the organization has room to become more inclusive. For D’Arcy her commitment to the women in this nation, natural born or otherwise, is unwavering and unapologetic-a practice I am trying to manifest in my own writing. I tend to pull my punches when speaking my truth in order not to offend my audience. All this has done is water down my work and leave me with a haunting feeling of dissatisfaction. Her boldness and “don’t give a fuck” attitude reverberates in every statement, every full bellied laugh, and declaration of self that she shared, and I will hold that with me forever.

Bubba Shakespeare:

Bubba Shakespeare (Bubba) is a free spirit. Our encounter was chance as I met him after his interview with another student. He had come to talk about his art as a rapper, but he also writes poetry, plays, and stand up comedy. He wears his heart on his sleeve, a smile on his face, and has a world of love in his heart. His artist style is open, gritty, and sincere- all traits that I want to incorporate into my own writing.

As an artist I immediately resonated with his most recent project which he calls “Understanding my Shadow”. Your shadow is something that everyone has, which is filled with darkness, self-destructive tendencies, and is ultimately a negative reflection of ourselves that threatens to take us over if we refuse to address it. His work confronts the shadow head on as he uses his writing as a way to combat his demons in a productive manor. Very similar to myself, Bubba’s art takes on a deeply reflective point of view, and explores his own vulnerability in order to connect with others. The rising rate of male suicide in Ireland is a major concern of his, which he attributes to a culture of toxic masculinity that prevents men in this community from seeking emotional support. This reality has heavily influenced his next album, and has given his work understated political undertones. His art takes on some difficult topics which he speaks candidly about in his music and poetry--satirically in his comedy, and what’s left behind is a clear, fluid conscience which feeds back into his work in a continuous cycle in way that shares his journey with the audience.

An angel in disguise, Bubba seeks to acknowledge the human in everyone, including himself. He lives this in every interaction, and it is very comforting to witness as he treats himself, and everyone around him with intentional kindness. His work extends beyond the page as he also uses his art to engage with his Cork community. He’s does street talks, rap battles, and has performed poetry for the YouTube channel TheLabtv Ireland in order to stay connected to this close knit community. (https://youtu.be/XBew4jXUtaU). He speaks about serious topics, without taking himself too seriously in order to maintain a “karmic flow” within his life, and is always looking for the craic***.  

***The craic is Irish slang, meaning what’s up, what’s the joke, or that something is funny.***

To listen to Understanding My Shadow by Bubba Shakespeare click below!

https://youtu.be/1mon0_dg6uc

All photos have been labeled for noncommercial reuse, are my own, are otherwise noted on the image, or cited below.

                                           Works Cited

        Shakespeare, Bubba. “Bubba Shakespeare-Understanding My Shadow.” Youtube.com, Cork, 4 Dec. 2017, youtu.be/1mon0_dg6uc.                                   

Original notes below:

Kathy D’arcy has had a relationship with our group prior to our trip to Ireland, however my first time meeting her was in our myth making workshop just last week. I was in love immediately. I’d been having difficulty arranging interviews with other feminist activists in Cork, or Dublin, due to timing issues, or a lack of activist self-identification. However, D’arcy wore her activism on her breast in big white letters: REPEAL. She opened her session with a mediation that brought us through concrete and metal to earth and soil. Effectively creating a space for us to acknowledge our reality, before bringing us to an exercise that would allow us to transform it-a practice I found that she holds to in her own artistry.

During the actual interview, D’arcy discussed the tension between her identity as an artist and as an activist.  At the age 18, she had a self-revelation when she encountered a group of women who had been directly affected by the 8th amendment and had a chance to humanize the nameless faces of the women who had been blacklisted by society. This encounter allowed her to open up a dialogue that would eventually move her away from her pro-life, very strict Catholic upbringing to a more progressive, pro-choice world-view. This is significant, because up until that point, she had been writing poetry that was somewhat detached through tradition and nonpolitical, whereas after, her work became influenced by her feminist engagement. This dedication has taken priority over her work as a poet, however, she has taken up the cross the press representative for Rebels for Choice and does a number of other administrative writing on behalf of the organization.

What I love about her commitment to her activism, besides the topic itself, is her absolute dedication. This includes being open and receptive to change, and constructive criticism from within the group. Groups of marginalized people had raised concerns that they were not being allowed to occupy space within the movement, an issue that D’arcy was very transparent and named a number of places where the organization can improve and become more inclusive. For D’arcy her commitment to the women in this nation, natural born or otherwise, is unwavering and unapologetic, which I hope can inspire my own writing. I tend to pull my punches when speaking my truth in order not to offend my audience. All this  has done is water down my work and leave me with a haunting feeling of dissatisfaction. Her boldness and “don’t give a fuck” attitude reverberates in every statement, every full bellied laugh, and declaration of self, and I will hold that with me forever.

Bubba Shakespeare

Bubba Shakespeare (Bubba) is a free spirit. Our encounter was chance as I met him after his interview with another student. He had come to talk about his art as a rapper, but he also writes poetry, plays, and stand up comedy. He wears his heart on his sleeve, a smile on his face, and has a world of love in his heart.

As an artist I immediately resonated with his most recent project about the “shadow” that everyone has, which is filled with darkness, self-destructive tendencies, and is ultimately the negative reflection of ourselves that threatens to take us over if we refuse to address it. Very similar to myself Bubba’s art takes on a deeply reflective point of view, and explores his own vulnerability to connect with others. The rising rate of male suicide in Ireland is a major concern of his, and he attributes it to a culture of toxic masculinity that prevents men in this community from seeking emotional support. This has influenced his next album, his poetic projects as well as how he carries himself in his daily life. Bubba seeks to acknowledge the human in everyone, including himself.  He lives this in every interaction, and it is very comforting to witness as he treats himself, and everyone around him with  intentional kindness.

[bisexualsatan-blog]

Your turn! The companion ask with your favorite inquisitor/warden/hawke :D

Oooh yay! Thanks! I actually have an ongoing headcanon in which all of the origins in all of the games exist, just in different roles. So I’m going to do my Trevelyan from that universe.

Character Name: Sabine TrevelyanRace / Element / Class / Specialization: Human Mage, prior to the events of the Conclave she was somewhat of an artificer, interesting in creating practical magic for daily use, including things that could be used even by those without magic. After the explosion of the conclave, she is one of those who devotes herself to studying the Rift and it’s relationship with the Fade.Gender Identity: Woman

Short bio: Sabine Trevelyan was born to a devout, dutiful family, who planned to send her to serve in the Chantry before her magic was revealed. The quickness with which her family sent her to the Circle and cut off all ties save those necessitated by maintaining their image was enough to make her question what she’d been taught, and the reality of Circle life solidified her belief that the Chantry was a cruel failure. But she still had the ambition of her Trevelyan blood, and the knowledge of how the Chantry and nobility worked, so she did everything she could to establish herself outwardly as a good, loyal, devout mage. In time, she was able to levy her bloodline and the connections she herself had established into becoming magical advisor to the Divine, a similar position to the one Morrigan held in Celene’s court.

Recruitment Quest: When the Circles rebelled, Sabine stayed at the Divine’s side, helping with reaching out to her fellow mages for the Conclave. She was attempting to reach out to her family for aid when Corypheus attacked. She presents herself at Haven after the Inquisitor returns from their first journey to the Hinterlands and offers her services. 

Where they can be found in your headquarters once recruited: At Haven she is found with Minaeve, studying the materials you bring back. In Skyhold she is down in the Crafthold with Dagna.

Side Missions (eg: fetch / gather / kill quests): You can use her to gain connections with her family in the Freemarches for influence points; she also has knowledge of several small groups of mages who can be recruited, and caches of magical tomes and artifacts, but these will only be revealed if the Inquisitor sides with the mages.

Personal quests:

Quest 1: Available upon recruitment is a fetch quest to recover a forbidden tome with collected legends regarding Andraste being a mage, rather than or in addition to being chosen by the Maker. The tome is located in the Fallow Mire, and requires defeating several waves of undead. Extra approval will be gained if Sabine accompanies you on the quest.

Quest 2: There is a couple that Sabine has helped before, a Chantry Sister and a mage from her circle that took advantage of the rebellion to flee together. She receives word that they are being hunted by a group of Red Templars and asks the Inquisitor for help rescuing them. If the Inquisitor refuses, all potential romance and further friendship is cut off although she will remain with the Inquisition. If the Inquisitor agrees and brings Sabine along there is a large approval gain and this can trigger a romance. The Inquisitor has the option to recruit the mage and the Chantry Sister as agents at the end of the quest.

Quest 3: Sabine’s family, thanks to her position with the Divine and now the Inquisition, has invited her to a ball they are hosting in Orlais. Sabine invites the Inquisitor if romanced or on friendly terms. The Inquisitor can decline which, depending on dialogue, will result in an approval drop but not the romance ending. If the Inquisitor attends, there is a potential duel, some stolen kisses (if romanced), and the opportunity to compliment or insult Sabine’s parents. Both result in approval gains.

Things that raise their affinity with the player: Siding with mages, helping those in need, insulting Orlesians, criticizing the Chantry, pursuing every quest related to gaining magical knowledge, asking Sabine’s advice, supporting Leliana as divine, and politically motivated decisions during Judgments 

Things that lower their affinity with the player: Siding with templars, refusing to help people, agreeing with the Chantry’s actions, agreeing with Cullen, insulting Sabine, putting Gaspard unilaterally on the throne, overly harsh decisions during Judgments

Are they romanceable? Yes, by women only.Can the relationship become sexual? YesAre they open to polyamory? Yes.If they can be romanced and are not, will they begin a relationship / relationships with other character(s)? If so, who? If the Warden did not romance Leliana, and the Inquisitor does not pursue a romance with her, there will be clues that Sabine and Leliana have formed a romantic partnership, one that will continue after the game if Leliana becomes Divine. If the Warden romanced Leliana, Sabine and Josephine will be often seen together.

Which other characters are they friendly towards? She would get along with all the mages. Her and Dorian are the ultimate in wlw/mlm solidarity and love to have wide ranging magical debates. She respects Solas and finds him fascinating, asking endless questions of his knowledge of magic and history. While she, at least internally, has a lot of disagreements with Vivienne in regards to the role of mages and magic in society, she very much respects the other woman personally, and her political finesse, and regards her as a valuable ally to cultivate. She and Varric get along well, and often discuss the political situation of the Free Marches while sharing a bottle of whiskey. She secretly loves the way Sera pulls Nobles noses, and is always friendly with the other woman although Sera’s clearly wary of her magic and noble birth. She knows Cassandra from her time serving the Divine and while they are not particularly close, they get along fine and she respects her. 

Which other characters do they not get along with? She avoids Cullen at all costs, but speaks civilly to him when circumstances require it, although the Inquisitor can walk in on a heated argument between them after the Mages or Templars are recruited. She has little interaction with Blackwall, and is wary of Iron Bull given how the Qunari treat their mages and his apparent belief in the rightness of the Qun. She finds Cole fascinating and very sweet, but tends to avoid him because the idea of her personal thoughts being spoken aloud is one of the worst things she can imagine. Privacy is very important to her after life in the Circle.

Opinions on other races? Other elements?

She doesn’t know much about elves, dwarves, or Qunari, but doesn’t trust Chantry doctrine on them, and much like Leliana in Origins, will correct her behavior if called out on racist speech or actions. Her friendship with Dagna, and her own interest in artificing, has made her deeply curious about the relationship dwarves have with lyrium and magic and she intends to study it further, particularly after the revelations regarding the Titans.

How do they feel about magic / religion / the government?

Sabine is very pro-mage, and anti-Chantry, but also believes that the Chantry is too big to be destroyed and so must be reformed from within, willingly or not. She admires Anders actions and believes the rebellion was necessary, but ultimately thinks it requires someone like Leliana to step in and force the hierarchy and system to change, and thus being to alter the opinions of the people who believe in the Chantry. 

Something guaranteed to make them leave the party: If the Inquisitor has gained no approval with her and recruits the Templars instead of the Mages, she will leave the party, believing the Inquisition to be an ineffective tool to accomplish her goals