#which means I wouldn’t of had the idea for CC to stick with Something else other than DW
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doctorgalilei · 4 years ago
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I wanna stay optimistic but Chibnall really should have just written another season of Broadchurch instead
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acerace · 3 years ago
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The thing is, Scott clearly loves interacting with fandom. He said it himself- one of his favourite things about Twitter was interacting with fans and seeing fanart. And that he missed being able to do that after MCC 14. So it doesn't surprise me in the slightest that he's actively engaging in the Tumblr empires fandom (and 3rd life too); the 3rd lifers would send each other fanart and animatics all the time, and Scott seemingly tells his friends about the empiresblr antics he finds funny.
If Scott genuinely had a problem with something or was uncomfortable, he would just block and move on, like he actively advocates for this policy himself in his August 1st stream. He knows how to navigate the internet, you don't have to worry over him being uncomfortable because if he was, he'd stop engaging with it.
And it's perfectly valid to freak out when Scott mentions fandom stuff, because imo it's like you're hanging out with a group of friends- you're going to act differently when it's just you guys and when a teacher walks by. But the thing is, the second you post anything on the internet, the second that fic leaves your Google drive or you share that art on discord or in the main tags, there is a chance other people will see it, right, and in a fandom based on other internet users, the chance is decently high that they'll see stuff too! And the thing with public discord servers is that anyone can join- Ranboo's public server has 430k people. Michelle Obama could be there and you wouldn't know unless she posted a selfie. With a smaller fandom like Empires, there's going to be less people, but that doesn't change the fact anyone could theoretically join- if Michelle Obama was a big Ldshadowlady enjoyer there's nothing stopping her from hopping into one of the various empires servers.
And when we joke about how much better Tumblr is than Twitter and pspspspssps the ccs over, especially the ccs who had a bad time on twt, well, we shouldn't be surprised to find that a) they at least look through the tags and b) that they like it here. I think the thing is we all got so used to the idea of no one knowing about Tumblr, constantly talking about how no one realizes we're here or saying that the site is dead, that we forgot it is still very much an active and public site that anyone can visit. This is not a private discord server- Tumblr is literally the original blue hellsite and biggest fandom space online.
Yes fandoms are for fans first, which means this is our turf, the ccs don't decide what we can and can't do, the fan content is removed from them, but they also have the right to check out this fan content themselves. Same thing as Misha Collins tweeting about destiel hitting the big number in ao3 fics, something he'd only know if he looked at fandom. If Scott sticks his head in here and goes "wow you guys are hilarious I'm gonna stick around" he can! And he can curate his own experience the same way we tell everyone to do. Scott being here ultimately means nothing and changes nothing- and this is going to sound a bit mean I know, but if you don't feel comfortable posting things with the knowledge he could see it, then I have bad news for you: he could always see it, he's just being more transparent about it now. Anyone can see what you post online, Scott is not invading your personal space here, we are in public and anyone can see everything, so if this knowledge of his presence changes what you post, then you probably weren't posting with this idea in mind in the first place.
Personally, I think we have nothing to worry about as a group, and that if Scott (or anyone else) wants to vibe on Tumblr or in a public discord than he can. Anything to get the ccs off Twitter <3
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korissideblog · 3 years ago
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soooo alot of people really liked my Takao Talking ideas, so i decided to make a fake little fan transcript <3
this is really really short, but it's my first time really going into philosophy without a prompt, so maybe I'll get better as time goes on <3
{hiya!!! I’m @spaceACE✩! (=^-ω-^=)~ }
{I luv luv luv Takao Talking!!! And while Taka has CCs on his videos, I just thought it would be fun to do a transcript for some of my fav videos!!! (=´∇`=)~ }
{soooo here it is!!! ฅ/ᐠ ‧̫‧ ᐟ\ฅ please like, comment, and enjoy!!!!
(๑✪ᆺ✪๑)~ }
''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''
aki put my camera up really high and now i have to turn it on and off with a broom handle. let’s talk about optimism in the bad times.
[Takao looks directly up at the camera, the camera being at a very very high angle. Takao is a fit, tallish person with lightly tanned skin, curly brown hair, and shiny yellow eyes. He has two sets of horns, one set that holds closely to his skull and goes up at the very end, and another set that does straight out, again going up at the very end. She is wearing a simple black choker, an oversized white t-shirt that says “Of Course I Cum Fast; I Have Fish To Catch!” With an outline of a bass jumping out of a body of water on it, and black biker shorts, as well as black slides. He is holding a broom in his right hand.]
Takao: Ah, alright. I think it’s on now.
Takao: so! I was supposed to be posting a video that had my buddy Aki in it, but apparently someone was “being a nuisance” and someone else would “rather look at me than a camera lens” or whatever.
Takao: he was just being pissy and he put my camera up really high. And hey, that was cool when we were hanging out, sure. We made lunch together and ate it. It was a fun time all around. Problems arise when he leaves my place, and “forgets” to give me my camera back. I have to turn it on and off with this. [Takao swings the broom around a bit]
Takao: So if this video goes out, it means I’ve either grown a few inches, or I’ve invested in a step ladder. Both of these events are equally possible.
Takao: And if this video doesn’t go out, then you know what happened. Except that you don’t know, because this video obviously won’t be out. You guys are smart. Out of all my friends, I’m sure you could guess which one would fuck up my recordings.
Takao: anywho! Since I'm here, forced to keep my chin up, let’s talk about optimism in the bad times.
[Takao drags a settee into frame with a great amount of struggle. Cut to him carrying a small end table over and putting it next to the settee. Cut to him placing a plate of sliced apples on the table, as well as a glass of (sparkling?) water]
Takao: [lounging across the settee] it was Gottfried Wilhelm Leibniz who believed that we live in the best of all possible worlds. He based most of his ideas off of the assumed existence of capital ‘g’ God, so that isn’t exactly the most popular idea about optimism that’s currently going around, but it’s what I'm gonna use for today’s video.
Takao: If we live in the best of all possible worlds, how can one explain the mass suffering that we face? One could possibly say that without knowing suffering we wouldn’t know joy, I personally agree with that, but one could also say that suffering is a consequence of the joy that we have. If there is no joy without suffering, then there is no suffering without joy.
Takao: I’ve personally gone through suffering, in many parts of my life, but I’ve also experienced joy. And given the ability to start it all over again, i think i would still suffer unnecessarily in order to be joyful unnecessarily.
Takao: But optimism in the bad times is different. It’s going through suffering and somehow finding something to appreciate, it’s, cutting your finger with a knife, but being alright with it because you can wear your buddy’s merch now. [Takao holds up his hand, and on it is a bandage. It’s a bit blurry, but it looks similar to merchandise that is currently out for pro hero Smokestack]
Takao: it’s not finding joy in suffering, that’s masochism, it’s joy in spite of suffering.
Takao: But I'm sure all of us know how hard it can be to find joy while suffering, so we kinda can skip over that part sometimes. I didn’t find joy in the fact that I could see my reflection in the knife that cut me, but I did find joy in the healing aspect. My suffering was mostly over by the time I got the bandage, but I still put it on because I needed something good to come out of the experience. I was working on healing myself, and that’s where I found joy. [Takao takes one of the apple slices and eats it. She lifts the glass of water, but pauses before he drinks it]
Takao: and hey, I wouldn’t have had the same joy if this bandage wasn’t my buddy’s merch. Maybe I wouldn’t have even put it on! Maybe there’s a timeline where I never met Jetsam, but I still got the same cut, and it got infected and I lost my finger. [Takao takes a sip of the water, and puts it back down] Obviously this is an exaggerated example, but you get my point. There’s a timeline where I didn’t make the friends I have today, and I suffered more because of it.
Takao: It’s hard being your own therapist. [Jiji, an old black cat, walks into frame] That’s why your therapist exists. Humans are social creatures, and will always suffer from loneliness. [Jiji paces in front of the settee till Takao picks him up and puts him on her lap] no matter how uncomfortable it can make us, we need other people. Other people may not be able to stop our suffering, but they can help us get through it, and help us heal afterwards.
Takao: [looking into the lens of the camera] I originally made this channel when I was… you know I was kinda messed up
Takao: Real sick in the head.
Takao: But you know what?
Takao: Van Gogh painted the Starry Night while in drug rehab
Takao: So maybe I’m onto something here
Takao: Maybe good things don’t come from bad things,
Takao: …
Takao; Maybe good things come from healing after bad things.
[The frame fades to black]
[A quick cut back to Takao as he holds the broom, trying and failing to reach the camera without standing up from his settee]
[A quick and startling cut to Takao’s feet as she quickly walks to another room]
[Takao is now wearing different shoes, black boots, and is closing her front door. The dull click of her boots is heard softly]
[Cut to more walking, this time down a sidewalk. The click of his boots more pronounced now]
[Takao’s feet sway side to side as he sits on a subway]
[Takao records a woman in a tight pink dress. The woman is attractive, tall and blonde, but the camera is focused on her bag, large and a matching shade of pink. Out of the bag pops out a tan chihuahua with a pink spiked collar. The subway speaker talks indistinctly]
[More walking down a sidewalk, but at a quickened pace]
[Takao points the camera at a mirror in an elevator, his head is not shown, posing cutely with her leg up and a peace sign]
[More walking down a hallway as Takao finds a door]
[Takao flips through a strangely large ring of keys. Once he finds one with ‘BC’ crudely carved into it, she sticks it into the lock and turns it]
[He opens the door and walks into a living room. A man sitting on a couch looks up. This man is Aki Hiroharu. Hiroharu seems to be watching the news while eating something out of a bowl. Hiroharu looks shocked to see Takao, and may be about to speak, but immediately stops as he goes to cover his face with his arm]
[The camera shakes as Takao throws a step ladder at Hiroharu]
Takao: BITCH ASS-
[There’s a short few shots of the two fighting, clearly playfully, but neither seem willing to lose]
[Someone puts the camera down gently, walking back to the couch and resting their legs onto the open stepladder. The person is a fusion of Haruhiro and Takao, commonly known as Akito by fans. Akito continues to eat as they watch the news.]
[End]
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thexam-union · 3 years ago
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Riverside Relaxing
First fic to be put up here!! It’s the Chessy Boys up first, which surprises me just as much as it might surprise you! It’s just some soft fluff because that’s what got made :>
Length: 2031 Words
General Overview: It’s too hot outside, and the gang get together to cool off by the water in Land of the Tiger. Also ship moments between Tevel and Apollyon!! They’re grooving!
Warning(s): Mentions of heatstroke (no incidents or harm done, simply concern)
( If you need anything else tagged/forewarned about let me know!! )
The worst thing about the Digsite was the heat. The baking sun made it borderline impossible to work during the middle of the day, the sun’s glare roasting everything through to the point of burning without any hesitation. It was fine when nothing was scheduled, but when you were stuck there all day waiting for sunset? Pain. Suffering, even.
Tevel half-heartedly pushed open the door to Alcor’s office, the beige and yellows of the walls being anything but welcoming as they set themselves down in the chair after haphazardly hanging their jacket on the back of it.
“Please don’t say what I think you’re about to say, but what are you here for?” Alcor said with a short, sharp glare in their direction, before looking back at the computer screen on their desk. He seemed taken aback when they gestured towards the ceiling he got in response. Specifically, the fan. Normally when Tevel comes in all sheepish, it’s probably because something broke, so this was a surprise. “Right.”
“How mad would you be if I said I’m just hanging out here for that and that you’ll have to put up with me or let me go elsewhere.”
“Not very, but that’s just today.” Alcor simply shrugged behind his glasses, sipping at his drink before putting the fan in front of him in Tevel’s direction. “I’m glad you haven’t broken anything.”
“In this weather? No way, I wouldn’t. Thanks, by the way. But yeah, who’s in your personally-manned hell of emails today?” It was a joke, but clearly not anything rough-sounding. Surprising, given it’s Tevel of all people, but he already knew they didn’t like his email practices.
“The Marquess, and a few other people. You don’t get the emails.”
“I’ll level with you, chief, I’ve got your address marked as spam. Doesn’t work, though, you’ll be glad to know. Also, Aludra’s letting people hang out. I know you’re as antisocial as they come, and that neither of us like each other, but it’ll hurt my one entire moral,” They very dramatically put up their index finger, “If I don’t tell you and you get heatstroke.”
“Right. I’m glad you’re conscious of safety on the digsite. I’m actually surprised you didn’t just go.” Tevel shrugged. “Or did you want the go-ahead for tonight to be cancelled first? I know you used the last workplace safety book I gave you as a fuse to spite me. Impressive, but you know how I feel about that sort of thing.”
“Yeah mostly I guess. Heatstroke sucks, and I like to annoy you. Not almost kill you with negligence. Anyway, if you want to CC the information to people that don’t even go here, fine by me, I’m leaving. See you there, yeah?”
“Mhm. I’ll be right out. Thank you, Tevel. Are you sure you’re alright?” They’d just stood up and picked up their jacket, holding it over their arm as their sunhat covered their eyeline. “You’re acting a little strangely, today.”
“I’m fine. It’s too hot to blow up the place, and I can’t burn down Aludra’s place, I’ll feel so bad.”
“I thought you had one moral standard.” Wait, did Alcor just make a joke? What the fuck. What the fuck? He even laughed and everything.
“Uh-- Right, uh, stay hydrated? I’m going.” And with that, the office door was closed and they were braving the sun again. That was so weird? Alcor had never made a joke, and they’d known each other for years. It was mostly disappointed and annoyed glaring in their direction. At least he was going to cool off later? Acting weird is a heatstroke thing, even when you have the fans in the area in your office you’re not safe, they supposed. But, they did their bit, and it was time for some - as Lesath put it - “much needed splashy splashy”.
To be honest, everyone apart from the Marquess was going to be there now Alcor’d been convinced, and even then, Aludra had been trying to set up a nice canopy so the Marquess could get out more? Unsure, though, they weren’t in the building things business. More the blowing things up business. More their speed.
Walking down to Aludra’s perch took a very short amount of time, and getting under the forest cover was all they needed to get going, really! The comfort of the running water was also very nice, although they didn’t expect a short tap on the shoulder. There, but short.
“Hey, chief, what’s up?” They asked, knocking their hat brim up a little.
“I haven’t been officially invited, so I think my presence would go over better if I’m with someone who was invited, if you get what I mean.” Tevel shrugged. “That’s common practice for social engagements.”
“Yeah, but it’s also Aludra. If she can put up with your slew of emails, she can put up with you in person. Plus I don’t think she dislikes anyone. I gotta say, you’re acting off.”
“Off..? How so? I feel fine.”
“Yeah. Too... Person-y.” Tevel made a vague gesture with their hands, like someone would when describing the movement of a bug. “And that sorta thing’s a sign of heatstroke. You’re my boss who’s allergic to fun, and I heard you make a joke earlier.”
“I assure you, I’m fine. I’m not allergic to fun, I’m allergic to your idea of fun. You’re about as self-aware as a teabag at times.” He sighed, shaking his head, but Tevel seemed… happy with that response? And he was the one that was acting strangely?
“That’s the Alcor that I know.” Tevel half-cackled as they tended to, swinging their jacket so it was over their shoulder rather than over their arm. “Good to hear you’ve still got it, chief. Was actually half-worried something’d happened to ya.”
“I appreciate the concern for my safety? That’s weird coming from you, though.”
“Eh. I like things being consistent and-”
“You’re a demolitionist. What part of that is ordered?”
“Explosions happen in the same way almost every time, and it’s pretty. Consistent behaviour’s what helps me sleep at night, I’m sure you can agree on that.” Tevel laughed, nudging Alcor with their arm as they got to the clearing, and the others were starting to come into view. “Besides, I do pay attention to safety laws. I’m qualified, actually.”
Apollyon had their shirt - jacket? - open over her swimsuit, Lesath was curled up on a well-made perch, Aludra had her laptop open a bit away from the water, and even the Marquess was out here! She was sitting on a deck chair near the side of the water under a parasol, though clearly not dressed for it. Hell, even Citala’d been convinced to drop by! That was slightly less impressive than Tevel of all people dragging Alcor along, but the gap wasn’t that big!
“Yo, you brought him along? How?” Apollyon asked as the pair got up to the side of the water, Tevel sitting on the edge of the waterfront beside her and Alcor settling near Aludra, who’d put down her laptop. Probably to talk to each other rather than sending emails.
“Concern about heatstroke.” With a wink and a slight poking of the tongue, Tevel yawned and leaned back. “It’s so cool here I love it so much.”
“And he set with that? I’d thought he’ll drag you over to my place to toss you in the hoosegow instead of coming over!”
“Consider the following, Apple, it’s Aludra’s thing, right? And look at them.” Apollyon nodded a little. “No one can say no to Aludra, sure as hell not him, you know?”
“Them? Mashed? I didn’t know she had taste that bad!” They looked around everyone else, who seemed quite happy to spend a hot afternoon there. “I didn’t know she did that at all to be completely fair. Same with Alcor, he’s a barn sour and that’s it, I thought. Clawing at the gate when he has to leave it.”
“Yeah? I don’t know, I don’t talk to her much and Alcor’s harder to talk to than a brick most of the time.” Apollyon laughed a little at that. “But yeah, bad taste if true, but also the only thing I thought he loved was his email inbox, and I’m probably right on that one.”
“Yeah, he’s a bit of an odd stick, isn’t he? But enough about your work, how you doing, Tev?” Apollyon reached into a small covered hamper crate on their side of the water, and passed over a can of soft drink, cold to the touch. Perfect. “Also, love to see everyone get together like this, y’know? So glad Morava had the idea.”
“This was his idea?”
“Well yeah. Aludra can’t say no to anyone, and Morava’s all over logistics. He got all of us a half-crate of our favoureds, who else would get that done? Even Ali’s roaming around here, she’s having a great time!”
“True! I’m just glad I don't have to do work today, you know how it is.” Apollyon nudged Tevel in the side for that, setting both theirs and her own hat down on top of the drink crate in that order.
“You? Not wanting to blow things to high heaven?” She gave a slight laugh in response to her own point, before taking a sip of drink.
“More likely than you’d think, Apple! It’s dangerous in high heat. You should know that. As much as I joke about ignoring safety, I do pay attention to a little bit. Don’t tell anyone, though, I have a reputation.”
“Secret’s safe with me, Tev. Will say, very surprised the Marquess came down. Must be awkward. She’s just kind of sitting up there with Citala, y’know?”
“I mean if she’s happy to be here? I don’t know her that well. And no, not your time to go ‘I’ll check it out’ and get us both in it. I like being the spooky chaos one no one knows in any meaningful way.”
“Consider the following: Some of us want to know you. Perceive you. Behold you, even.” Apollyon said, looking directly at Tevel for a moment. “You’re knowable! Sorry Tev, I know you! I don’t know how you got here without letting me be there to see you.”
“And to that I say: I better not be! You’re different, though. You know that.”
“If I don’t get to know you I’ll actually be a little upset.” Apollyon laughed a little, yawning before stretching, although it was a quiet invitation for Tevel to lean on her. “You’re one of the funner people to be around.”
“I’m sure you would think that, Apple. You’re also very biased.” Tevel replied, pulling Apollyon’s arm over them in a way that was comfortable for both of them. “Wouldn’t have it any other way, though. You get to see me outside of work.”
“Mhm. Don’t you think your relationship with everyone else would improve if you were knowable, though? I know you want that.” Apollyon had started to gently run their hands through Tevel’s hair with a gentle smile, as they were just comfortable with their eyes closed and resting more on her lap than her shoulder at this point.
“But having to actually talk to people though. Plus, I’m not moving. You can suffer.”
“Oh, I’m suffering with my beloved lying on my lap. The struggle of being with the person I care about most. The anguish that comes with having a day off and spending it with you.” She said with a dramatic emphasis and feigned a fever for a moment. “We’ll improve your mess later.”
“I can’t believe this.” Tevel sounded offended, but didn’t really mean it. After all, how could they? They did in fact sign up for it.
“I hoodwinked you real good, darlin’. Until then, just us, okay?” A wink from Apollyon, and a laugh. This was going to be a rough few weeks, but if Apollyon really thought it was this good idea, then it probably was? Who knew. But hey, it was something for Future Tevel to think about, not the Tevel at this moment by the river. They were more than content.
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nadziejastar · 5 years ago
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We all know that Reno and Axel/Lea share a lot of similarities, but what about their differences?
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Elena: Reno, do you think that was really such a good idea!? I mean that the way a professional, a Turk would act!?
Reno: Elena. Don't misunderstood. A pro isn't someone who sacrifices himself for his job. That's just a fool.
Well, I can only judge him based off of the original FFVII, CC, and AC, since I haven’t had a chance to get a copy of the remake yet due to this lockdown. But I found Reno more easygoing. He seemed to genuinely like his job, even if it was shady. We don’t know what kind of past he had. It’s very possible that he comes from a messed up background and got into organized crime that way.
But my impression of him was that he enjoyed his job for the most part. It’s an exciting, fast-paced lifestyle and he probably makes good money. He also respected his higher-ups like Tseng. Unlike Axel, he wasn’t forced to follow orders in fear of being turned into a Dusk. He seemed like he chose to become a Turk. He didn’t seem to have any moral conflicts about his job other than at the end when he and the others refused to fight Cloud’s party.
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Axel did not enjoy his job. He never would have chosen to be in the organization and the whole experience was a lot more traumatic for him than Reno. He is a lot more stunted in his personality, which is why he is so obsessed with the past. Axel has a prominent childlike side to him that I never saw from Reno. In this panel HPO were playing frisbee which Lea used to do. He only eats so much ice cream because he used to do it as a kid. Things like that.
Reno can be goofy and playful, and in Advent Children, he had a soft spot for kids. But Axel’s relationship with Roxas and Xion was soooo much different than just being fond of kids. Axel genuinely seemed like he wanted to go back and be a kid again due to unresolved trauma.
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Reno: Hey, Rude. Who do you like? What are you getting so embarrassed about? Come on? Who do you like?
Rude: .........Tifa.
Reno: Hmmmm... That's a tough one. But, poor Elena. She...... you......
Rude: No, she likes Tseng.
Reno: I never knew that! But Tseng likes that Ancient...
Reno showed himself to be capable of normal adult relationships. His best friend is Rude, his peer and equal. They have adult level conversations including small talk about which girls they like.
Reno: Hey, partner. This thing got any bite to it?
Rude: Shinra technology at its finest.
Reno: Oh, so you made this.
Rude: If nothing else, it’s flashy.
Reno: Oh good.
Rude: You love it. I know.
Reno gets along well with Tseng, Elena, and the other Turks. He is seen drinking in the pub in Wutai with Rude and Elena. They’re on a normal vacation as friends and coworkers. Reno is a relatively normal and well-adjusted person, despite his job. He talks to his best friend Rude in an adult way. He doesn’t have to dumb himself down. They know each other well and have playful banter.
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Day 118: You Changed, Not Me
Author: Axel
Talking to Roxas and Xion always brings back memories of my human life, back when I was a kid. It's a weird sensation.I ought to be able to share all this with Saïx, but I just don't feel like it anymore. It's strange, but I'm content with just missing what's gone.I'm not the one who changed. You did.
Axel’s spent his vacation sleeping all day and being depressed about missing his childhood. He yearned to talk with someone his own age, on his own intellectual level, who would be able to understand him. Someone he could talk about heavier issues with an who he could have more adult banter with. But he had no one like that. So he tried to “dumb himself down” to a kid’s level.
Day 357: To My Best Friend
Author: Axel
Roxas left. It's so like him to just leave that WINNER ice cream stick behind. Come tomorrow, I'll probably get the order to hunt him down, but leaving that here makes it feel so permanent. I wish the three of us—three? No. That the two of us could share some ice cream again someday. That's what it is to be friends.
He actually became more and more childlike as the story progressed. As his relationship with Saix deteriorated, Axel gradually became obsessed with having someone to call “best friend” and eat ice cream with. He was desperate for ANY kind of emotional support. For most of Days, he was trying to do what was best for Roxas. By KH2, he really didn’t care what was best for Roxas anymore. He was more worried about himself. Overall, Axel just came across as waaay more mentally unstable than Reno.
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Reno: The correct answer was...
Rude: ...because it's our job.
Elena: Oh, thank you very much...! I never expected you'd to come help......
Reno: Elena, don't act so weak. You're a Turk!
Reno viewed being in the Turks as just a job. He eliminated undesirables like Don Corneo, but he also wasn’t ruthless or merciless. Aerith actually seemed like she was fond of him, despite him trying to kidnap her. They had a weird kinda bond. In the remake, Aerith was actually horrified when Cloud tried to finish Reno off. Because she didn’t see him as a real bad guy or threat to her. At the end of FFVII, Reno and the Turks just let your team go.
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Axel: Remember the order: "You must eliminate the traitor." I always follow orders, Marluxia.
Axel was actually darker than Reno in certain ways. Until he met Roxas and Xion, he followed any orders obediently. He seemed to take a lot more sadistic pleasure in the killing part of his job. He wasn’t just doing a job.
Axel: No way!? It's too soon! You can't seriously get rid of him!?
Xaldin: It's an order. Why do you hesitate? You, who has been ruthless towards those who've turned their backs on the Organization?
Axel was enthusiastic about killing. He was venting his anger and hatred, which is not the sense I got from Reno. Of course, since Axel was basically forced to be an assassin as a child, he had another side to him. Reno constantly admonished Elena for being too soft. Axel never ever would have acted that way with Roxas. He tried to shelter him from any of the harsher aspects of the organization. 
The longer you know someone, the less you need to speak in clear terms. Everything gets across with a wink and a nudge, a little reading between the lines...When it comes to what befell our late comrades at Castle Oblivion, ambiguity suits me just fine.
He dissociated from those aspects himself. Deep down, he knew what he was doing was bad, and he used euphemisms and ambiguity to avoid it.
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“We don’t disappear… We’re only reborn,” Naminé murmured, perhaps to herself.
“I’m not like you and Roxas,” Axel said flatly. His hand holding the ice pop stick paused in midair. “It’s because I don’t have a heart. I don’t want to disappear, but I’m not upset or sad about it.”
He had a very childlike way of dealing with his job. He used the word “icky” a lot, which is a very childish word that little kids say. He told Roxas he was ordered to do “something bad” which also sounds like something a small kid would say. He couldn’t use the word “kill”. He tried to give Roxas treats in the manga to avoid the “icky” subject.
Roxas: Saïx called her "broken."
Axel: Hmm... Well, if it cheers you up, I'm probably a lot more broken than her.
He knew he was messed up and that’s why he considered himself different from Roxas and Namine. He wouldn’t have a next life. He seemed to have a lot more guilt and self-hatred over his deeds than Reno.
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romyism · 5 years ago
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     – 𝐚𝐡𝐚𝐡𝐚 , 𝐚𝐲 – it’s ya girl , 𝒖𝒉 , skinny penis. jkjk , it’s only me , cc , local apocalyptic Hoe and i’ve been kinda sick lately Whoops. i’m a cst-er and go by she/her pronouns and will respond to any nickname i receive. i’m bringing my bby romy into this friend group and honestly ? she’s quite a handful so i’m gonna sneak in this apology first thing because phew , she’s so much i almost put ‘ these hands / her fists ’ as her weapon but i didn’t think that was the best idea for her.
( kim yerim → twenty → cisfemale ) ROSEMARY “ROMY” NA has been spotted hiding in the cabin. when you see HER, the odds of seeing them with a HIKING STICK in their hand is very likely. apparently their friends see them as the INCENDIARY - which makes total sense seeing as they’re VENTUROUS & PERCIPIENT as well as being CLIMACTIC & PROVOKING. i just hope they can survive the apocalypse…
AESTHETIC: holding back rambunctious laughter in a silent library, never being afraid to confront someone who’s done you wrong, a wide smile with a busted lip, the feeling of the wind blowing through your hair, half-buttoned dress shirts and short skirts, taped fingers from your latest fight, never being seen without a smile, being fiercely protective of the ones you love, the bigger the hoop the bigger the:, pulling hair in the non-sexual way and always being known as a firecracker.
* QUICK STATS /
full name: 나 로미  /  na romi  / rosemary na nickname(s): romy preferred name: romy age / dob: twenty  /  may , twenty-third , ‘ninety-nine gender: cisfemale  /  she/her pronouns label: the incendiary  ( designed to start fires / tending to stir up conflict ) faceclaim: loml , kim yerim ( yeri from rv )
* QUICK FACTS / HEADCANONS
legally blind, her glasses are thick af and she isn’t afraid to give someone a headache by making them wear her glasses.
is never seen without a smile on her face , even if she’s getting pulled out of a fist fight or is having a yelling match with someone.
a mix of class clown with drama queen so all in all: a+ annoyance. major annoyance. just isn’t afraid to make an inappropriate joke at an inappropriate time.
like stated above , is also super dramatic. just one of those girls that’ll scream at the slightest inconvenience just to laugh about it.
is very confrontational and isn’t afraid to start a fight if she feels like she or one of her friends has been wronged
has daddy issues but will joke about her dad like he’s a part of her life all the time.
has been in a lot of fights , have gotten a lot of stitches and casts and has had her ass handed to her multiple times but has no intentions of stopping.
genuinely has been getting into physical fights since like the fourth grade and definitely knows how to fight and surprisingly HASN'T gotten charged for assault or battery yet considering she's definitely the type to start AND finish a bar fight and has spent a night in local sherriff's stations.
her weapon is a hiking stick but she's ... good FDSKLASJA, hand to hand isn't the BEST idea with zombies but she's gonna try anyway. ( also, she's probably taped a knife to the end of the hiking stick and probably twirls it a lot, bobbi morse style and doesn't take it seriously smh )
a happy , dramatic , fighting small gorl. so kinda like a golden retriever honestly.
*BULLET POINT BIO
where can i even begin ? to sum up romy’s life in a nutshell , she’s a bundle of trouble who’s gotten into a lot of fights and has some big daddy issues , okay ? if you want a taste of who she is , she’s inspired a lot by the song HER by chase atlantic :)
but ! basically , born to korean immigrants , romy was given a very american name in hopes of giving her a normalized life in america. she was only ever spoken to in english , ridding her of a chance to learn her native language and spent very little time to learn about her culture. all of these decisions were made by her mom , who loved romy so much despite having her at a very young age.
from ages one to six , she was pretty happy and had a pretty average life. her dad was a hard worker , learning the ins and outs of computer engineering / software just as it was taking off and had a good enough job to support the family and she was 100 % without a doubt a daddy’s girl. she had him wrapped around her little finger and she just absolutely adored him , no matter what he did.
then , a couple months after her sixth birthday , she remembers watching him pack up a suitcase and leaving. she doesn’t know why and her mom never told her , but she remembers sitting on her bed and seeing her dad through the crack of her door packing up in silence and leaving without even saying goodbye to her , which sorta broke her little heart.
but she could tell it broke her mom’s heart too , so romy just ... continued with life without ever really dealing with it because That’s Just What You Do , you know ? she became a rambunctious little kid and by the time she was in junior high she was a regular trouble maker. she didn’t intend to make life harder for her mom , but she just had a lot to deal with and didn’t know any other way than to throw hands in the girl’s locker room.
she wasn’t horrible , seeing as she still had friends and was quite popular around school. she wasn’t a bully either , but people knew she wasn’t afraid to get knitty gritty. but , even though she’s known for fighting , she spent most of high school just sitting in the front of class cracking jokes with the teacher. if you wanted someone to distract the teacher while you finished your project , romy was your girl.
in the same vein , she was sort of ? a drama queen. would complain loudly and often about nothing , make a big deal out of nothing and wouldn’t be afraid to march up to someone and confront them if she thought she had good reason to. so actually , maybe she was a little bit of a bitch , but that’s just who she was.
barely graduated , still isn’t sure how because she spent her last semester of senior year showing up late and leaving early. but graduated anyway and since she didn’t have the grades for college , left town and started traveling instead. mostly makes money through odd jobs and things locals will pay her to do , so is now mostly a jack of all trades.
*PERSONALITY
oof , uh if you couldn’t tell from the bio , she’s a handful.
her pos traits are venturesome and percipient , meaning basically: she’s adventurous but she’s got a good grip on things. people don’t expect much from her because ... dumb jock who gets into fights , but she’s mostly got a good grip on things fjsdlfdsj. she’s just v courageous and adventurous and is usually the first to volunteer for doing the Thing nobody else wants to do.
her neg traits are climactic and provoking because: she’s dramatic and she’s confrontational. no stranger to a fight , she’s not afraid to start a fight if she feels like she or one of her friends has been done wrong. unfortunately , that means she’s ready to throw down at any given moment which can be problematic because calm down romy.
all in all , a wild spirit that has no intention of calming down. if she was on a reality tv show , she’d be the crazy one because she just ... is a firecracker of a human being.
* WANTED CONNECTIONS
all of them fdsafad
BUT ! i’d love to see some rivals / enemies / neg connections because romy is kinda the worst so people who can’t stand her , people who she’s gotten into fights ( physical or not ) , people who think she’s a bit much , all of the above fdksfs
or someone who she loves dearly ! people she considers blood and would fight for no matter the situation or if they asked!
someone she has an unrequited crush on or vice versa ! someone who has she has a mutual crush on but she has daddy issues so it never really works out fjdsa any gender for this one babY
hook ups / exes cause again ... daddy issues. any gender bbies !
ex friends ??? we love an angsty friendship connection here where they used to be friends and something happened and they WANT to be friends again but it’s Complicated.
ex enemies !!! FKDSJ where they ‘hate each other’ because of their really rocky past BUT it’s not that deep they actually love each other now.
a smooth lil will they / wont they / exes / angst-y plots because i without a doubt am a hoe for angst in the apocalypse.
if nothing here floats ur boat PLS lmk and we can brainstorm cause i already love all ur muses and want plots with ALL of them.
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stillthewordgirl · 6 years ago
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LOT/CC fic: Wager
Sara and Leonard definitely have some issues to work out since his return, but it's been an adjustment for the entire Legends team. And they, of course, deal with that in their own unique way. (Set during and not long after "Me vs. You.")
Yeah, I love this 'verse. Here's another one! Please note that it's set partly during the, err, events of "Me vs. You" and partly afterward. Many thanks to LarielRomeniel for the beta.
Still with my own weird take on who Charlie might be (I want Mick to befriend a dragon, OK?) and the Constantine & Gideon 'ship no one asked for! (Hellship? Magicship?) Can also be read here at AO3.
Find the series here at AO3.
“Aw, come on, luv.” John Constantine leans back against the table in the rec room and looks beseechingly up at the ceiling. At least, Mick thinks he’s trying to look beseeching. If anything, that sort of expression came less easily to the warlock’s face than to Mick’s own. And that was saying something.
“Just a ‘yes’ or ‘no.’” Constantine, apparently forgetting who he’s talking to, absentmindedly sticks his unlit cigarette back in his mouth. “To settle the bet. That’s pretty innocent, right?”
Mick, who’s sprawled on one of the room’s sofas, snorts. He can nearly hear Gideon’s sigh. For an AI, she’s got more personality than a lot of the people he’s known. Of course, after more than three years, he’s known her longer than he’s bothered knowing a lot of people. Er, more normal-like people.
“Mr. Constantine,” Gideon says almost primly. “As I have told you before, that is, quite frankly, none of your business.”
That’s about the fifth time she’s told the warlock that. Mick snorts again. Constantine glances his way and flashes a quick grin around his cigarette. Zari, perched on one of the stools at the table, just shakes her head. Nate mutters something, and Ray gives him a look.
Charlie has long since wandered away, uninterested in human drama—or, Mick thinks to himself, more uncomfortable with it. He gets it. He often feels the same, after all, the motives and reactions and feelings of so-called normal people a mystery.
Well. They’re none of them particularly normal, here, if normal is even a thing that really exists. (He’s pretty sure, these days, that it isn’t.)
Still, the human drama here is between two of the people he lov....he likes most in the world. Two people he wants to be happy...and to stick around. Blondie, he’s pretty sure, isn’t going anywhere; this is her ship now and she’s captain more than assassin, even if she’s still just as badass as ever.
Snart...well. 
“I can’t believe this,” Nate mutters to himself, getting up from his own seat. “It’s more likely she pushed him out an airlock. Haven’t you heard them since Snart come back on board? I don’t think they’ve exchanged two words without fighting.”
Mick frowns. Pretty’s having a hard time dealing with Snart’s presence on the Waverider, and he supposes he can sorta understand, even though he’s still ridiculously pleased about it himself.
“He’s not the one you saw,” he tells Nate tersely. “As part of the Legion.” He really hates these moments when loyalties old and new clash. For that reason alone, he hopes Constantine wins his wager. Could solve a lot of problems.
Or create new ones. But right now, he’d be OK with new ones.
The historian paces to the other side of the room, then turns, starting back at him.
“Isn’t he?” Pretty demands. “Isn’t he the exact same person? Just from a few years later in the timeline? What makes you really think he’s changed that much?”
“Other than the fact he’s been working with us for a month?” Zari asks, even as Ray stands up, too, distress on his face. Mick’s just trying to not to show that the words hurt, taking a pull of his beer as he tries to figure out what, if anything, he wants to say.
He should have left with Charlie.
“Snart was...is a hero,” Haircut speaks up staunchly to Pretty. “I told you what happened. He sacrificed himself—or he thought he was going to, anyway—to free time. And even before that, he saved our lives lots of times. Russia...Salvation...”
“Could say the same about me,” Mick cuts in, once he decides what he wants to say, before anyone else can distract him. He looks right at Nate. “How d’you know I’ve changed? I was...I was a lot worse than Snart, really. Once.” He shrugs uncomfortably. He is, now that he thinks about it, pretty sure Nate has no idea about Chronos. But even before the bounty hunter, he’d been…he’d done a lot of bad things. It’d been Snart who kept him in line.
Nate’s angry look fades, a little. For a moment, he looks pretty uncomfortable, too.
“You...you’ve proven it,” he says. “Lots of times.”
“So did Snart. You just weren’t there t’see most of it.”
“Will you all shut up?” Constantine asks, turning to survey the room with a world-weary eyeroll. He glares around indiscriminately, then takes his cig out of his mouth and looks back up.
“Gideon, luv,” he explains again. “All I want to know if they’ve snogged yet.” He puts the cigarette back in his mouth. That thing must be disgusting by now. “Or shagged.”
Nate snorts now. “Sara’s got better taste than that,” he says with disgust. “He’s like, 20 years older than her…”
“Good bit less than that, Pretty.”
“And she gained two years in Nanda Parbat, and he lost three in the timestream…”
Zari laughs like she can’t quite hold the humor back. “You...” she says, pointing at Nate, “...have got some weird ideas of good taste.”
Haircut gives her a rather wide-eyed look. “You think Snart’s good looking?” he asks, a bit plaintively. “I mean, I guess he sort of is. If you like that bad-boy type...”
Zari looks thoughtful. “Mm. Those eyes...” she muses. “He’s not my type. But he does have pretty eyes.”
Pretty snorts again. Mick shakes his head. Constantine smirks.
After they’d all beat their hasty retreat from the confrontation on the bridge, collecting down in the rec room without even discussing it, no one had wanted to talk about the elephant in the room at first. Ray had tried to start “Star Wars: Episode I,” nearly gotten booed out of the room, and conceded to skip ahead to Episode IV. (“Time for the prequels later, when we have some booze in us,” Mick had advised him.)
But eventually—maybe it was the Han and Leia banter, maybe it was the fact that the divide of sorts in their team…in their family…was on all their minds—talk turned back to Sara, and Snart, and how things were before (via the two remaining who remembered) and how things were now.
It had been Constantine (of course, Mick thought) who said it.
“One good bottle of whiskey that the two of ‘em are snogging it out right now,” he’d said, feet on the low table in front of one of the sofas, hands folded behind his head, eyes on the TV. “Or better yet, shagging it out.”
Nate sprayed a mouthful of rum and coke over the carpet. “What?”
Constantine had given him a lazy glance. “Seriously, mate? Those sparks? Really? You think you don’t get that kinda…” He waggled a hand. “…back an’ forth…without sexual tension? In spades?”
Haircut had stared at him…and then started nodding. “Ooooh. Ooooh, damn. All those times they were ‘playing cards’…”
“They were playing cards,” Mick cut in. “Not like they weren’t headin’ toward…somethin’…but they weren’t there yet.”
Hell, if Snart was gonna fall for anyone, he’d be happy if it was Blondie. But Mick also knew too much to ever think it’d be easy.
Not that he’d tell Haircut or the rest of ‘em that.
Charlie, who’d been raptly taking in the adventures of Luke & Co., had frowned, turning around in her seat.
“They were going to mate?” she asked Zari, who choked on her iced tea. “Would there not have been hatch…” She thought a moment. “…babies?”
It was hard to hold back a laugh, but Mick did it. He knew that Charlie hated feeling like a fool for questions that seemed perfectly reasonable to her. He’d been there.
Zari (after darting a look at Mick that said someone was going to pay for making her explain the human facts of life to the shapeshifter) started a low-voiced conversation that had Charlie staring at her in amazement.
Haircut, who apparently figured he didn’t want to touch that one with a 10-foot pole, decided to act like he hadn’t heard. (As did Nate, Constantine, and Mick.)
“Ooooh,” he said sadly. “And then Snart died. Um. ‘Died.’” He made air quotes. “And even though he’s back, that’s a lot to unpack.”
Constantine groaned. “It’s not that complicated!”
But it was.
Constantine had stood by his assertion—and his wager: the others could acquire him some quality whiskey if he was correct. Nate had declared that the far greater odds were on Sara kicking the thief off the team—and probably off the ship, possibly while it was still in the timestream. The rest of them (barring Charlie, who took this all in with an expression of great dubiousness) were somewhere in the middle.
Mick, personally, wasn’t sure if Sara, even now, or Snart were...what was the phrase he’d heard Leo use once? emotionally healthy...enough to mend their fences that fast. But then, he supposed that wasn’t really a requirement for what Constantine was talking about. Frankly, he figured, it’d probably do them good to bang and then talk it out.
Which meant it probably wouldn’t happen.
“Sara won’t just kick ‘im off the team,” he said finally. “Not after…everything. An’ Snart’s prob’ly too stubborn to jus’ leave.” He hoped. “Best case, they manage to talk long enough to work some of their shit out. They do that…” He shrugged, then took another drink. “…maybe they hook up. Do ‘em both good.”
Constantine pointed at him. “Need something more concrete for a wager, mate.”
Damned Brit did like his wagers. Mick considered. “Going to say they did talk,” he said finally. Optimism doesn’t come easily to him, far from it, but hell, he’s got Snart back after three years of his partner being dead. Who knows what’s possible.  “Things get back to norm….to what they were, once, w’them…I give ‘em a month before they fall into bed with each other.”
Zari cast him an interested look. “What were they?” she asked. “This is the first I’m really hearing of this.”
Mick thought about it a moment. “Friends,” he said eventually. “An’ it’s not like Snart ever had many of those, so that’s sayin’ somethin’ in itself.” He took a drink. “Don’ think I’ve ever seen ‘im take to someone like that before. Not in a long, long time, anyway.”
Anyway, Haircut had agreed that if Sara and Snart would just talk, the odds of something happening were high. Pressed for specifics, he’d decided on three weeks for his deadline. Zari decided to put her wager on five weeks before something—whether shagging, snogging or kicking off the ship—happened.  (And cupcakes rather than whiskey if she won.)
Charlie, vaguely horrified and slightly intrigued by human mating habits, had already beat a hasty retreat. Mick didn’t blame her.
Now, however, having watched their way through the entire original trilogy and enough of Episode One to get a buzz on (for some of them, anyway), the others have all wandered off too. Constantine had actually fallen asleep on the sofa, head leaning against the back, snoring, but then woke with a snort, shaken his head and climbed to his feet, winked at Mick, and headed out, presumably to the room he was using as his own. Mick trusted Gideon to let someone know if the warlock decided to try to…interfere with…Sara and Snart.
Even Constantine couldn’t be that stupid.
Mick relishes the relative silence for a few moments, watching the duel of Obi Wan and Qui-Gon and Darth Maul on screen, then turns off the TV.
He sits for a moment, then raises his voice.
“Gideon?”
“Yes, Mr. Rory?” The AI sounds serene. She and Mick get along pretty well these days.
“Jus’…jus’ let me know if I need to referee or get anyone to the medbay, OK? Otherwise, better if they just have it out.” He takes one last drink. “One way or another.”
“Of course, Mr. Rory.”
One of the nice things about being in the timestream is that they generally get to sleep in. Mick, who is not a morning person at the best of times, appreciates that. Yawning the next “morning,” by ship’s time, he saunters down the hallway, barely sparing a moment for the varied considerations of the night before. That’s how he keeps going. You keep moving forward.
Then he turns into the galley.
He knows the minute he claps eyes on them.
Snart’s across the counter from Blondie, but he’s leaning toward her, nearly draped over the surface, hands clasped in front of him and his eyes fixed on the captain. Sara’s on the other side, but she’s watching him in return, and there’s the tiniest of smiles hovering around her lips.
Mick’s never been the best at feelings. Far, far from it. But he’s known Snart for more than 30 years, and he knows what a Leonard Snart who’s gotten laid looks like. (Although given how picky Snart is, it’s been a lot less often than it could have been.)
Bingo.
He’s never been happier to lose a bet.
They both look at him as he pauses in the doorway, and Mick knows immediately that they know he knows. They’re…OK, fuck, he’ll think it, the two people he loves most in this world. How does he handle this?
By pretending nothing’s changed, he figures.
So, after pausing for just a moment, Mick simply grunts, moving into the galley and over toward the replicator. Once he has his coffee, he eyes Sara and Snart a moment, taking a drink.
They’re now wearing almost identical smirks. Mick’s not sure whether to be appalled or amused. Both, he decides. The Brit is going to be insufferable.
Unless…
He regards them; they regard him. Then Mick grunts again.
“British is gonna be really annoying,” he advises. “So…maybe tone it down a bit?”
Sara chuckles, taking a drink of her own coffee. Snart lifts an eyebrow.
“Why, Mick,” he drawls. “To what are you referring?”
And then he actually laughs as Mick gives him a weary look in return
Mick can’t remember the last time he heard Snart laugh. It’s a good sound. But he merely rolls his eyes, watching them.
Snart tilts his head and looks at Sara, who does much the same in response. Whatever they decide in that moment of wordless communion, the captain nods, looking at Mick.
“Nothing’s changed,” she says firmly, taking another drink of coffee.
Mick gives her a look of disbelief. Snart’s smirk grows a little. Sara, catching the expressions, smirks a little too, but then sighs.
“Really,” she says, leaning against the counter. “It’s not…we’re not…” But then she looks at Snart again, and oh damn, they’re back to the eye sex.
The moment stretches, just enough to have Mick wondering if he should leave, but then Sara seems to catch herself, shaking her head. She smiles a little, then looks at him.
“OK,” she says. “So maybe some things have changed. But some of it’s just between us…” She waves a hand between herself and Snart. “…for now. Anything to do with the team…well, we all have to sort out that dynamic.” Her smile grows. “I think it’ll be for the better.”
Well, then. “Damn right,” Mick says softly. Then he holds up his coffee mug, in a sort of wordless toast.
After a moment, Snart and Sara hold up theirs, too, clinking them together before they drink.
And Mick hasn’t been this happy in a long time.
So, of course, that’s when Constantine has to appear in the doorway.
He’s rumpled, as always, though he’s not, for once, wearing his coat. Given that he hates mornings with a passion that surpasses even Mick’s, it’s a little surprising that he’s up and moving. But Constantine’s eyes brighten as he takes in the three of them standing there…and, OK, this should be interesting.
“Ah,” he says happily, strolling into the galley. “So, did you two shag or what?” He claps his hands together and leans against the counter. “Inquiring minds want to know.”
Snart gives him a withering look. Sara lifts an eyebrow.
“Excuse me?” she says mildly.
“You heard me, luv.” The warlock is unrepentant. “I have a wager on this. Tell.”
Sara considers him. Then she shrugs.
“Nothing to tell,” she says, turning away to rinse out her coffee mug. “Now, where were we going next? You said something about werewolves in Victorian London?”
Constantine gives her a disapproving look. Then he transfers his gaze to Snart.
“What about you, handsome?” he asks, leaning toward the other man. “You the type to snog an’ tell?”
Snart considers him, too. Then he shrugs as well.
“Like the lady said,” he drawls. “Nothin’ to tell.”
Constantine actually pouts. Mick keeps his own face empty as the warlock glances at him and then sighs.
“All right, all right,” he says. “But the truth will out.” The pout fades into a bit of a good-natured leer. “So, you both like blonds, eh? Good to know.”
Sara shakes her head at him; Leonard ignores him. The captain gives Mick another quick smile and then steps around the counter, heading for the door.
“John, let me know when you’ve got this particularly juvenile line of inquiry out of your system,” she tosses over her shoulder. “So I can set a course. Mick, Len, I’ll see you later.” And then she’s gone, out into the corridor.
“Len?” Both of Constantine’s eyebrows are up. “Well now, mate, that’s new.”
Snart finishes his own coffee and rises with alacrity to retreat. Mick can’t really blame him.
“Not particularly,” he drawls. “Mick, if you still want me to make the same tweaks to your gun that I made to my new one, I’ll drop by the fabrication room in about an hour.”
Mick nods. Snart casts him another lurking smile, then saunters out. He doesn’t head in the same direction as Blondie, though, which is probably good, because Constantine is watching avidly. (Although maybe he’s just admiring Snart’s ass; Mick can’t quite tell.)
After a moment of silence, the warlock sighs, turning his gaze on Mick, who’s still silently drinking his coffee.
“I will find out,” he promises, then glances upward. “Gideon?”
“Mr. Constantine?” The AI’s voice is wary. Mick can’t blame her.
“This could be so simple, luv. Just tell me? I’m sure I can find some way to make it worth your while.”
If Mick didn’t know better (and maybe he doesn’t, to be honest), he’d swear Constantine was trying to flirt with the AI. Gideon’s pause is longer than usual, and who knows? Maybe it’s working? Mick waits.
Finally, she speaks. “Mr. Constantine, I believe the correct response, in your own vernacular…”
Constantine grins, leaning forward, winking at Mick and listening avidly.
“…is ‘sod off.’”
Mick can’t resist laughing out loud at the look on the warlock’s face. This is, he thinks, going to be interesting.
And he’s just fine with that.
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dramallamadingdang · 7 years ago
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A buncha replies about high-poly hair, fur-coated vacation locals, evil enablers, laziness, an old game being old, time management or the lack thereof, creepy pizza delivery dudes, terrain defaults that may or may not work, House Hunters and stupid Americans, nuzzling cats, cheap but AWESOME 80s knives, fermented milk and Canadian weirdness about it, forcing TV on people who don’t want it, annnnnnnd...Texas? Yep, Texas.
Quite a list, ain’t it? :) IOW, these go back a bit because I’m...me. 
These are for @immerso-sims, @nekosayuri, @fuzzyspork, @kairisu, @alawren4ever, @ajaysims, @didilysims, @delicatesoul88, @dreadpirate, @treason-and-plot, @jellybeanery, @pensblr, @twofee, @hemfbg, and @penig. Because Texas. ;)
Also, peripherally, @twofingerswhiskey.
immerso-sims replied to your photo “So instead of filling up my queue OR firing up my rebooted Castaway...”
I am guilty of having quite a few high polycount hairs, but I don’t have much CC in general and my Macie seems to handle them well, even with an integrated video card, so all is well, but yeah, 30k is a liiiiiittle bit excessive.
I have a few really high-poly hairs (20+K), myself. My game/computer does seem to be able to handle them without a fuss. (I really don’t know WHY, since both the machine AND the video card are older models, but...Hey, I’m not gonna argue. :) ) Even so, the ones I have are special and unique and very fabulous in some way, and if I later find a similar just-as-nice but lower-poly style, I’ll ditch the high-poly one in a heartbeat.
Mostly, though, I stick to hairs that are ~10K polys or less. I’ll have as many of those as I want because I figure if my game can handle the 30K+ ones without issue, it can handle a bunch of 10Ks. I have fewer that are 10K-12K. 13K is generally (and arbitrarily) my hard limit unless the hair falls into the “unique and fabulous” category and, really, those are few and far between.
nekosayuri replied to your photo “So instead of filling up my queue OR firing up my rebooted Castaway...”
@digitalangels lowered the polycount on Aviary, I'm pretty sure
I wouldn’t be surprised if she has. But really? There are already plenty of quite similar hairs that look just as nice as that one and that have much lower polycounts. I’ll bet it’s one of those that has thousands of backfaces that don’t even show in the game. :\ 
fuzzyspork replied to your photo “Well. This isn’t something you see every day. :) (Guess I missed that...”
The static she will collect on the way down will make that coat look like a tribble.
Yeah, like a tribble...or like they slaughtered a thousand-and-one poofy Pomeranian dogs to make her coat. :)
kairisu replied to your photo “Well. This isn’t something you see every day. :) (Guess I missed that...”
she's sliding in style ��✨
Maybe. But she’s gonna make a mess of that fancy fur coat. :)
alawren4ever replied to your post “So now that the second Blind Date gift I was called upon to make is...”
Fun thing of course!
See? THAT’S JUST NOT HELPFUL! :D I enable myself to do the fun thing quite well, thank you. ;)
nekosayuri replied to your post “So now that the second Blind Date gift I was called upon to make is...”
Get a mouse recorder to do it for you XD
That’s tempting, but the majority of the time spent on the “editing,” such as it is, is cropping the pics in the right place and to (more-or-less) the right size ratios. It’s never the same twice, so it couldn’t be automated.
(Confession: I had to Google “mouse recorder.” I mean, I could kind of tell what one would do from the name, but I doubted that such things actually existed. SURPRISE! :) )
ajaysims replied to your post “So now that the second Blind Date gift I was called upon to make is...”
I really know what you mean. My head is always bursting with a million different hood and story ideas but at the end of the day a lot of the time I just wanna play without thinking about editing pics after.
Yep, that’s me, too. I mean, I have (literally) about 1200 GilsCarburg pics to post. I mean, they wouldn’t all be posted because a good chunk of them are similar, where I took a lot of pics knowing I’d pick the best one of the bunch to post, but still...a lot. It’s going through them and making the posts that I drag my feet on sometimes. I kinda have to psych myself up to do it -- although once I start, I enjoy doing it, so it’s not a chore or anything :) -- and it’s easy to distract myself by, for instance, downloading a bunch of hairs for my Castaway game because I want to try my hand at making defaults for it.
nekosayuri replied to your post “You're my Senpai. Lol jk but for reals I adore you! You make amazing...”
Senpai XD tbh this is one of those things though, people actually PLAY the game AND make cc AND download stuff AND organise downloads folder/Tumblr posts. How do people have time for all of that??
I honestly don’t know how most people do it. For me, the answer’s easy: I’m mostly retired -- I’ll do paid gigs if I get bored and want to, but otherwise? Eh. -- and I don’t have to worry about money. And I have employees. That helps, too. Also, I have health issues that prevent me from doing a lot of things I’d LIKE to do. So, I do Sims-related stuff a lot. And go on a lot of dates with my husband, but he DOES work, so I can’t be doing stuff with him all the time. So, for now, unless/until I decide to do some kind of volunteering, I occupy a good chunk of my time with Sims stuff. And with hanging out with friends and whatnot, too, of course. But...Yeah, I don’t have a “normal” life. I don’t know how people who DO have a normal life manage to do all the Sims stuff they do.
delicatesoul88 replied to your post “Hi there, I’m pretty impressed that you create and use a lot of high...”
@dramallamadingdang I feel like I should print this and place it up right next to my monitors for the next time I take the cc cleanup plunge. The flashing pink bug is real and has caught up to me, I also know its my own darn fault for having so much cc. My computer can handle it but my game can't, and this is the swift kick in the rear I needed to remind me of that.
dreadpirate replied to your post “Hi there, I’m pretty impressed that you create and use a lot of high...”
Personally what works for me (since I love my sims 3 and 4 conversions and my pretty hairs) is playing with smaller lots as much as possible and going easy on the clutter
Yeah, it’s all a matter of prioritizing. You truly can’t have everything because “old game is old” even if you personally own a supercomputer. So, you focus on what’s most important to you and sort of skimp on the other stuff. So if pretty hairs and conversions are your thing, OK, but you might have to sacrifice, yeah, large, heavily-landscaped lots and lots of deco-only clutter and/or a heavily-hood-decorated neighborhood. Or if you’re a person who doesn’t actually play the game and just does, say, decorating, you can have all the converted, high-poly/high-res shit your little heart desires because you don’t need the high-poly hairs and clothing or the neighborhood stuff. Or if you’re mostly a Sim-maker, you can have all the high-poly hairs with gigantic textures that you want because you don’t need anything else that taxes the game. 
And if you want to do everything...Then I say: Separate user accounts/different downloads folder for each purpose. So, if you wanna decorate, you load up the high-res conversions. You wanna make Sims, load up the high-poly hair. You wanna actually play...Don’t go batshit with the big stuff and you’ll generally be OK.  Conscious downloading is the way to go. Know what you’re putting in your downloads before you put it in there and make conscious, aware, informed decisions so you’re not surprised by any consequences (i.e pink flashing) that you experience..
It’s all balance, man. Like, be in harmony with the universal spheres, totally.
treason-and-plot replied to your photo “This pizza delivery dude that my game generated…looks like a pizza...”
He has seen things...
Seen many things, yes. Let’s just hope that he hasn’t done anything...to the pizza... :)
didilysims replied to your photo “This pizza delivery dude that my game generated…looks like a pizza...”
Just as long as he doesn't get any of those long hairs in the food.
Things like that, yes! :) Or, you know, worse. Ah, all those urban legends... :)
jellybeanery replied to your photoset “Happy Monday! Now that Blind Date is over, I’m back to doing Monday...”
Eeeee! Thank you! I'm grabbing this and gonna check it out tomorrow! ♥
Well, I hope it worked better for you than my first stab! :) Please let me know if it didn’t! 
fuzzyspork replied to your post “To be or not to be...a bitch.”
My reply to this sort of thing is "Oo, this is short notice. We already have plans!" Even if those plans are to watch Netflix in our underwear. They are probably just doing the Christian thing by inviting you guys and they may not even care if you come (my sister is of the High and Mighty mindset and she invites out of "duty" but is always relieved with people can't come or cancel, lol).
You know, of anyone else, I’d believe this. But whenever we’ve turned down an invite, there’s always been tons of wheedling about it. So, either they’re really good actors or they really do want us there. I’m pretty sure it’s the latter, since entertaining and cooking big meals and all that is what the female half of the couple lives for, since aside from going to church, she’s stuck at home, homeschooling their 7 kids, ranging from infants to teens. (Which is another reason to avoid their house, as far as I’m concerned. I’m done with kids. I don’t hate them or anything, but I really don’t enjoy being around them. Especially not toddlers. I’m not even goo-goo for my own grandkids, so I don’t want to deal with anyone else’s kids anymore.)
pensblr replied to your post “Random non-Sims things”
Just going to leave this here. https://i.pinimg.com/originals/75/a2/2d/75a22d07e38b1fedd15834c67bea0bb2.jpg
*sporfle* Yeah, that about sums it up, I’d say. :)
immerso-sims replied to your photoset “Kitten spam, with captions.”
The nuzzle animation is so cute :3
It is! I think they could’ve done so much more with pet-to-pet interactions, personally. Like, cats and dogs sleeping in piles like they do IRL. Also, pets sleeping on beds with Sims. (I have the mod that enables that for children, but it would have been nice if that was possible for all Sims.) But at least that one interaction is cute. :) 
fuzzyspork replied to your post “Random non-Sims things”
Oh god House Hunters. What gets me is when they decide they don't want to buy "the perfect in every other way" house because the paint/wallpaper/carpet is hideous. I always yell at the TV "THOSE ARE EASY TO CHANGE YOU PRISSY IDIOT!" But we ditched cable TV a few years ago and I've never been happier. It's so much more relaxing to just watch what we want streaming, when we want, not bound to a show's schedule.
Yeah! I saw that, too! I was like, “You know what? There’s this thing called painting. And if you don’t want to do it yourself, there’re even people who you can pay to do it for you!” But when the realtor says something like that (with not NEARLY enough snark, IMO), they’ll say “Oh, we don’t want any big projects.” As if painting one room before there’s anything in it is a “big project.” Stupidity abounds!
And yeah, I’m much happier without squawk boxes around. The only remotely good thing about it is Cartoon Network. And some of the HGTV-type stuff is fun to watch, I suppose, if only to get ideas for my game. ;) But I much prefer no TV. I mean, yeah, I know no one forces anyone to turn it on, but we feel like we should watch SOMETHING since we’re paying through the nose for it. :p
twofee replied to your post “Random non-Sims things”
house hunters international is hilarious because they always want to be in the center of whatever city, pay almost nothing in rent, and at least one person in the couple expects everything to be americanized. plus if they are asking for it to come furnished, they always complain about how its not their style or whatever. i just want to see the pretty scenery of the country youre lucky enough to be able move to. have you been able to guess which house theyll pick?
I can pretty much always tell the house they’ll pick because it’s usually the one that’s most like what the female half of the couple wants. Which is so stereotypical but...there it is.
And yeah, I watched an “International” one the other day. Some chick looking for a place to rent in Spain who was bitching about the lack of central air conditioning (In buildings older than America, that she said she WANTED to live in) and freaking out because -- OMG! -- the washing machine was installed in the (small) kitchen! Americans, SMH. Of course, she ended up in a new place with central air that was very American and also above her budget, but she justified that by saying she’d be more “comfortable” there. :p Moron. Why go live in another country if you just want to drag yours along with you? Isn’t that exactly what a certain sector of American citizens bitch about when it comes to immigrants? But what do American émigrés do? *sigh* Swear, most Americans just need to stay the hell in America because God forbid they deign to adapt to anything else. :p
hemfbg replied to your post “Random non-Sims things”
It's funny that you mention House Hunters- it's playing on the tv in the other room. Sometimes I'll watch it when it's on just because I like to look inside other houses, though I agree with you about it being very safe-for-tv and every episode being the same.
I did actually see a gay couple on it the other day! Of course, they were a white, middle-aged well-off gay couple looking for a place in Palm Springs, CA, which is pretty much a place you can’t live in unless you’re LGBT (and well-off), but still! Gay people, OMG! 
nekosayuri replied to your post “˜Tis reply time! \0/”
Maybe you could suggest it over at MTS to people who actually mod? it is a great idea overall! and it *might* be possible, but wont know till we try right? :D
I did post the idea in the “Hacks & CC You’d Like To See” thread over there. It’s not a request thread, though, because MTS doesn’t allow requests. It’s more like an “I wish” thread, and a lot of the stuff wished-for IS impossible, but sometimes people have picked stuff out of the thread and actually done it, so...Well, it’s out there in the world. Of course, right after I posted it, a little argument broke out about something unrelated, so it quickly got buried, but maybe something’ll come of it. Who knows?
didilysims replied to your post “Random non-Sims things”
3) I need to get me some of those knives! I feel like I'm sharpening my junky knives every time I use them because I refuse to crush my poor vegetables instead of cutting them. Never heard of the brand but I looked it up and apparently they're still making them. Probably not as good quality as back in the day but...I'll keep my eyes open in the stores now. :)
I was amazed to find out that Ginsu still exists. But yeah, those knives are way nicer than their 70s/80s ancestors. Which, yeah, probably means they won’t work half as well. :) Gimme my cheap plastic-handled bread knife made of God-knows-what ANY DAY!
didilysims replied to your post “Random non-Sims things”
1) Pretty sure internet packages try to include TV these days because the TV stations are paying them extra money to force it on people. 2) I say it the American way (never heard the English way in my memory) but I spell it with an H. There are almost as many different spellings as there are different Canadians, however. I've also seen yogourt, which is an odd one.
1) I’m pretty sure you’re right. I’m also pretty sure that most people do still want TV...although I’m pretty sure that, as time goes on, most people will prefer to stream what they want when they want it, so I think standard TV’s kind of on its way to dinosaur-hood. So perhaps one day it will no longer be forced on people. Probably won’t happen before I croak, though. :P 2) Yeah, @twofingerswhiskey reblogged with a pic of a yog(h)(o)urt container spelled “yogourt,” which is apparently how they spell it in Quebec (so I guess that’s how it’s spelled in France? Who knew?), which is apparently where most of y’all’s yog(h)(o)urt is made. :) Which is kinda weird, if you ask me. Why Quebec? Are there no dairy cows in Saskatchewan or Ontario or Alberta? :) I’ve seen dairy cows in BC, so I know they’re there...
penig replied to your post “˜Tis reply time! \0/”
Army bases can be beautiful. Ever go to Ft. Sam Houston? There's a reason all the officers retire here...
Nope, never been there. I’m sorry to say that I avoid Texas as much as I can. No offense to you or to any other individual Texan out there, but...y’all have a lot of bombastic asshats amongst you. And y’all seem to elect sexist, grabby-hands asshats at an alarming rate, too. Whenever I’ve been in Texas, I’ve had bad experiences at the hands of those two groups. So...Yeah, not going there if I can possibly help it. THAT said, I know that the cities are generally better and I’d like to visit San Antonio one day -- and maybe Ft. Sam Houston -- because I’ve heard that it’s, like, the artsy/hippie capital of Texas, kind of like how Santa Fe/Taos is the artsy/hippie capital of New Mexico, but....yeah. *sigh* 
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takemichiyukinyaru · 7 years ago
Text
Reddie No. 1
Me? Projecting onto CCs? It’s more likely than you think!
I’m actually really proud of this piece- it’s the first fic I’ve written in about three months and the first fic I’ve written in ages that broke 2k words so Take It
Richie sits down at the table, looking around the cafeteria for his friends.He had English, and Ms Grey almost always let them out of class early, so he has the chance to claim a table and sit down wherever he wants before the rest of the Losers get there. He sets his tray down, before picking up one of the shitty plastic forks to start eating.
Stan and Bill arrive first, greeting Richie before they sit down next to him, Bill in the middle between the other two. Ben comes next, across from Stan, who he immediately absorbs in a conversation about their history project (he really got the short end of the stick, being stuck in a history class all alone this year.) They’re discussing the Ironworks explosion, and Richie cringes. They both know the real cause of the explosion, but obviously, they’ll get a fail if the actually mention It. Which is kinda sad, really. Stan still has the little lines of scars on the sides of his face from where that weird-ass woman tried to eat his face.
Finally, the man of the hour arrives, sitting down next to Ben and in front of Richie. Perfect.
“Hey, Eds, you speaking today?” Richie calls out, over the noise of the cafeteria. Eddie scowls, pulling his salad out of his lunchbox and taking a bite.
“Fuck off, Richie,” he replies.
“Yeah, I’ll fuck right over to your mom.”
“Wow, really? C’mon Trashmouth, that was weak.” “Yeah, like your dick.”
“What does that even mean?” Stan asks, looking over at Richie. Richie shrugs, grinning. Bill rolls his eyes.
“Oh hey, Stan the Man, did you do the maths homework due next period?” “Yeah?”
“Can I borrow it? I forgot to do it between annoying Eds and fucking his mom.”
“You did not fuck my mom!” Eddies yells, scandalised as usual “And stop fucking calling me that!”
“No. Do your own homework for once, Richie. We all know you have time between annoying Eddie and lying about your sexual prowess.”
Richie looks shocked into silence for a moment before Eddie sighs in annoyance and starts rifling through his bag.
“Here, you can borrow mine, as long as you don’t get any oil from those fries on it. Do you have any idea how fucking awful that shit is for you?”
“Yeah, yeah, I know, just hand it over.”
Begrudgingly, Eddie does, along with a packet of wet wipes, which he’s meant to be using to clean his fingers of grease and sauce and whatnot before turning the page. Eddie has to remind him sometimes. He works quickly, scrawling the working out in the space provided while everyone else is joking around. In about fifteen minutes, he’s done, handing the papers back to him.
“Thanks, Eds.”
Eddie gives him his patented ‘Go-Fuck-Yourself’ glare, grabbing the homework out of his hands and putting it neatly back in his bag. “I can still tell the teacher you copied me, you know.”
“Yeah, But you’re not.”
“What’s gonna stop me?”
“My Good looks. Duh.”
Eddies rolls his eyes “Go Suck a dick.”
“Sure, I’ll go suck your mom’s.”
“You’re disgusting,” Eddie goes back to his food, pointedly ignoring Richie. Richie just shrugs, joining the heated argument between Bill and Ben about what the best superpower is.
“Omnipotence, obviously. The ability to do anything? Sounds great!”
“C-come on, that’s a cop-out,” Bill says.
“I’d go with flight myself. Y’know, it’s probably like ridin’ a bike but better.”
“Unless you crash into a wall at eighty miles an hour!”
“Yeah, b-but you can have that problem with any superpower!”
“Yeah, any superpower! What about if you have invisibility and you’re using it to sneak into the girl’s bathroom and-“
“Hey, Beep Beep!” Ben says, looking at Richie disapprovingly. Richie rolls his eyes, checking the clock. Twenty minutes have passed. The lunch period is only thirty-five minutes long. If he wants to make his move, he better make it now.
And so, with a mischievous smile on his face, he kicks Eddie in the shin.
“Ow! What the fuck, Richie?!” Eddie says loudly, looking up to glare at Richie, who’s making strange gestures around his face. “Oh my God, if you’re making fun of my fucking mutism I’m going to-“ he stops suddenly when he realises that the gestures are forming a coherent sentence.
“Hey, You’re gay, right?”
Eddie stops, glancing around at the other members of the Losers Club. Stan’s largely ignoring them, Bill’s looking concerned, but he’s fairly sure that he doesn’t know the handsign for ‘gay’, which he thanks whatever higher power he believes in for. Ben’s looking over to make sure he’s alright, but he also knows that Eddie likes guys, so it’s a moot point if he ‘overhears’ or not.
“How the fuck do you know that?” Eddie signs back, glancing again at Bill, who’s fallen into a steady conversation with Stan.
“Saw you getting out books on AIDS from the library. I know how you get when you find out about a new thing that can get you sick.”
“And you used that as proof that I’m FUCKING GAY?!” Eddie’s hands are shaking, and he knows that he’s probably incomprehensible to Richie, who probably only learnt this to give him flack.
“Yeah, because your mom’s a fucking weirdo and she’s probably told you if you kiss a guy EVER you’ll catch AIDS and die,” Well. Apparently, he did get it. Or at least he was smart enough to fill in the blanks
“She never said that.”
“Really?”
“No. She just said that gay sex was dirty and disgusting and she’s RIGHT do you have any idea how much bacteria is in your ass? Or on your dick? It’s fucking gross!”
Richie tilts his head to the side, repeating the word ‘bacteria’ in confusion. Eddie sighs, fingerspelling it for him. Richie nods.
“So are you gay or not?” Richie asks after a moment. Eddie’s eyes darken, breaking eye contact.
“No! And even if I was, I wouldn’t tell someone like YOU, Richie ‘can’t take anything seriously’ Tozier.”
“Okay,” Richie looks disappointed for a moment, picking at his hamburger and listening to Stan and Bill talk about birds or something.
“Why the fuck do you even want to know, anyway?” Eddie asks, and when he doesn’t get a reply, kicks Richie in the shin. He hisses in pain, giving Eddie a dirty look. He decides it’s probably karma and watches as Eddie repeats himself.
This is it. Richie takes a deep breath, fingers going from his chest to his forehead to his chin.
“I think I’m gay.”
Eddie’s eyes widen with shock and something that might be hope, before narrowing again.
“Bullshit.”
“It’s not! I wouldn’t joke about shit like this!”
“Oh yeah? And what made you realise that?”
Richie bites the inside of his mouth, thinking about the right way to say it without Eddie flipping out.
“I fell in love with a guy.” He says. There. Short, sweet, and vague enough that Eddie’s not going to flip his shit for being gross.
“Who? Someone in the Loser’s Club?”
“Yeah.”
“Bill?”
Richie shakes his head.
“Ben?” “Nope.”
“Stan?”
“What makes you think I’d fall for Stan?” “Because he can keep up with whatever bullshit you’re spouting and give it back as good as he gets.”
Richie nods along to his explanation. “Still, no.”
“Mike?”
“Not Mike.”
“Then wh-” Eddie stops signing, realising that he’s the last boy in the club. For a moment, he looks terrified. Then he’s angry, signing quickly. “Beep Beep, asshole. I can’t believe I fucking BELIEVED you, after all the SHIT you’ve done- you were just tricking me into confessing so you could fuck with me, weren’t you?”
The other members of the club have noticed Eddie’s wild signing, looking over at Eddie and Richie.
“Who’s fucking with you?” Ben asks, only catching the last few signs because of the angle he’s on.
“Richie! Asshole just learnt sign so he could ‘come out’ and screw with me!” Eddie says, glaring at Richie. Stan and Bill look at him in disgust.
“Wow. B-beep beep, R-Richie.I knew you w-were an asshole, b-but I didn’t realise you’d s-sink that low.”
Richie glances around the group, at their disapproving looks.
“What was even the point of learning sign? You could have just dragged him somewhere private if he wanted to talk without the rest of the school finding out,” Stan points out.
“I didn’t want you guys finding out, I thou-“
“Beep beep, Richie. If you’re going to justify being an asshole, don’t assume that we’re idiots.”
“I’m not being an asshole, I just didn’t want you to think I was-“
“You were what, Richie? A homophobic asshole? A manipulative dick? Or maybe you didn’t want them to think you were gay because Heaven forbid Richie fuckin’ Tozier would ever be interested in guys!” Eddie spits in his face, using anger to cover up the tears welling in his eyes. He fucked up.
“No, Eddie, you don’t-“
“Shut the fuck up! What made you think that you have the fucking right to fuck with me like that?! I can’t believe I thought I had a fucking chance with an asshole like y-“
“Listen to me!” Richie yells, slamming his hands on the table. “This isn’t a fucking joke!”
“Yeah, because you’d never joke about something as serious as this,” Stan says, sarcasm heavy in his voice.
“I wouldn’t!”
“Bowers,” Ben pipes up, face flat.
“My bar mitzvah,” Stan adds on.
“I-It,” Bill says, trying to avoid cringing. Richie falls silent.
“Wow, I really am an asshole, aren’t I?” He says quietly. The rest of the Lower’s Club just stare at him. Richie sighs, standing up. He picks up what’s left of his lunch, ready to put it in the trash.
“Fine. I won’t bother you anymore. I’ll find some other kids to be an asshole to. Maybe I’ll start a new group. The Dork Squad or some shit. I’ll see you guys around,” He says, slinging his bag over his shoulder and starting to leave.
“Richie-” something collides gently with his back, and Richie stops for a second. Eddie’s behind him, arms tight around his waist. “Yeah, you’re an asshole, but you’re our asshole, okay?”
“Yeah right. I know where I’m not wanted, Eds,” Richie tries to force his way out of the hug, before Eddie sidesteps away, grabbing his hands and pulling them away.
“I want you here, you dumbass!” Richie feels his stomach do a flip.
“Bullshit. You heard them, I can’t take anything seriously! I’m surprised you put up with me in the fi-“
“Richie Tozier if you finish that sentence I’m going to shove my inhaler so far up your ass you’ll taste asthma medication for three days.”
“No, you won’t.”
“You’re right, I won’t, because that’s fucking disgusting, but my point still stands. I put up with you because I like you, Rich. And if you end up joking about liking me, I’m probably going to kill you.”
“Well, it’s a good thing for the first time in my life I wasn’t joking,” Richie says, breaking into a grin. Eddie smiles back as the bell rings for class. Eddie jumps in shock, before quickly shoving his lunchbox back in his bag and throwing it over his shoulder.
“So…” Richie draws out the word as they walk to math class “Are we gonna make this a thing, Slut Shorts, or-“
“Stop calling me fucking slut shorts!” Eddie’s voice immediately heightens to a hell, before dropping off again, “But… Yeah. Let’s do this.”
Richie’s eyes light up as he sits down in his seat, Eddie taking his place between him and Stan. Halfway through the lesson, Richie sees Eddie’s hand against his leg, two fingers tucked in and his pointer and pinkie fingers extended. Richie glances at Eddie in confusion. He huffs, writing ‘ILY’ the margins of his notebook.
Again, Richie fails to glean any meaning at all from that, drawing a question mark underneath the letters. Eddie sighs, writing the full sentence down. Richie grins, looping one arm around his new boyfriend’s shoulder and pulling him into a hug that he never wants to get out of.
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vampireloreskill · 7 years ago
Note
how did you get into cc making/modelling/mesh editing? i really want to get into it but i don't know where to start
Well, I started dabbling in CC for the Sims 4 about… 2 years ago? Something like that? But except for the work I did with Zerbu’s Mod Constructor, it was all mostly reallly basic one swatch recolors/retextures, for a specific sim or house because I used to be very exacting about finding the Perfect piece of CC for any one project (alright, still am, just not as much).
I only did a very few mesh edits, mainly deleting lots of vertices and crying over UVs. Mostly though I avoided messing them- largely because I psyched myself out on how difficult it would be.
I didn’t seriously attempt anything else until right after I made my simblr back at Halloween, I started switching around the shades on lamps! And then right after that I made my first mesh from scratch! …Talk about running before walking haha.
And that’s just… what I’ve been doing ever since? I mean, I mostly went back to frankenmeshing because that way the end result being maxis match is pretty much guaranteed and I don’t have to do as much texture work which is just really tedious to me personally.
I have read a lot of tutorials, mostly from the Sims 4 Studio forums, but if I’m honest I mostly skimmed them to begin with and only went back when I ran into problems that could have been easily avoided if I had payed more attention in the first place! Also just using blender has been a complete trial and error, for the longest time I didn’t even know how to join vertices, use proportional editing (would have saved me so much time with my first hair), or even select multiple vertices that were in same location!
Basically, my CC creating method is an absolute mess, and I wouldn’t recommend it all EXCEPT. I feel there’s something to be said about figuring things out yourself and having it stick more than if you had just read it, like you have more insight into the actual mechanics of what you’re doing as opposed to just following a step by step and having less to go off of when something unexpected happens.
More to the point in regards to this particular ask, I guess I would say. Where do you want to start? 99% of my CC is born out of an idea of something that I want in my game, that no one else has made yet or in the same way as I want it- and with some exceptions that usually have more to do with me lazy than anything else I just Go for it, no matter how ambitious the project.
I have no idea if this good advice or not, so please take this with grain of salt and consider asking someone else but there are a lot of people who will list off good beginner projects and while that’s good for some, I personally don’t believe you have to limit yourself to that just because you are a beginner! Even if you have only the most basic grasp of what you’re doing, just keep hammering away at it until you get SOMETHING worth all the effort you’ve already put in.
Even if isn’t exactly how you imagine, or later on down the road you’re like “ugh this is terrible! what i was thinking!”- It’s still a start, and as you genuinely begin to improve and learn from your mistakes you can always revisit it and make it even better than you first imagined :)
I hope this helps even a little, and I apologize for the mountain of text- I’m assuming you already have S4S but if not here’s a link, I highly recommend checking out their creator help forum, be less stubborn than me and ask for help when you run into something you can’t handle.
 I don’t know what modeling program you plan on using, blender seems to be a pretty common choice though, and it’s what I use, so here’s a link if you don’t already have it.
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yakumtsaki · 7 years ago
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Take your hands off me, I don't belong to you, you see, and take a look at my face for the last time, I never knew you, you never knew me, say hello.. ♪
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WAVE GOODBYE. 
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WHADDUP PPL. Much like Ronroneo, we’re back from the dead and ready for a whole new generation of Union fuckery. We’re also officially.. drumroll.. MIDDLE CLASS. Our shiny new house is based on this one by frottana-sims​, which I downloaded but dumbassly forgot to install, and since loading the game takes a hot half-hour I opted for this poor recreation instead. We start the extreme home makeover with an incredible budget of..
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...Yea, I see the value of getting 6 pets to the top of their careers now. Included in this insane sum is the 20k+ that Wyatt and Jojo brought with them moving in, and at first I’m worried that we’re way too rich for only generation 2. Well, careful what you wish for, cause here’s our post-remodeling budget:
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LMAO. It’s as if not a day has passed since Vic started this legacy with a dream in her heart and crap to her name. Let’s check out the new digs!
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Everything was purple.. his pills.. his hands.. his foyer. 
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As eagle-eyed readers may observe, both the hall and the living room were designed with nothing else in mind but whether they matched our cat paintings. Per legacy rules I use as little cc as possible, which isn’t that hard since I feel this bizarre, angular and hugely impractical couch really encapsulates Jojo’s essence. Like if he was a servant in Beauty and the Beast this would be his furniture form.
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Apparently the only things I deemed important enough to capture were the cat portraits, so it looks like my Komeization is finally complete! Here’s some floorplan shots tho so you don’t get disoriented in our labyrinth-like mansion. Please note our amazing pink-blue-purple kitchen! Barbie’s Dreamhouse who??
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And here’s the second floor, which also illustrates the exact point I ran out of money. Honestly looking back I don’t understand how the fuck this place cost 70k?? Like nothing is particularly expensive except the amazing vintage batmobile which was around 30-40k and some of the paintings? But I guess all the small things add up in the end + I’m super bad with money..
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..and I’m not the only one. Jojo GET A FUCKING GRIP and A JOB. Literally no comment @ your cat wants, you inherited the jaw, wasn’t that enough??? ANYWAY. I know the question on everyone’s mind is how is Wyatt going to fit in with the Unions.. and all I have to say about that..
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..is LOL. Truly the perfect career for when your mother-in-law is a criminal mastermind and your husband is a serial killer! I mean the jokes practically write themselves. At least he doesn’t want 10 kids or any shit like that, cause I’ve seen hell and it was the result of mixing Jojo/Wyatt genes in cas.
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On top of gifting us with his future-probably-fug children, Wyatt also gives us the gift of our first ever kitchen fire when he decides to make dinner with 1 cooking point. His generosity really knows no bounds.
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It’s all fun and games now but Wyatt deadass almost died in the inferno and was about to take poor, stupid Komei with him, who of course ran to the fire even though he was in the yard. Meanwhile Victoria was safely watching tv and didn’t move while Jojo..
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..was doing this in the next room. Two types of sims I guess!
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-So Wyatt, you’ve been here for almost an hour now, burned down our kitchen and I still don’t see any grandchildren. I thought you were a family sim!
-Haha oh mom, you’re hilarious! Ignore her, Wyatt, let’s enjoy your delicious pasta.. It was definitely worth almost dying for.
-Your mama is right, mon cheri, not only do you have an obligatión to your famille but I rolled the want to have a bébé the second we graduated!
-Well it’s still gonna be there when we aren’t broke, Wyatt, god!
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-But.. bébés, mon cheri! Tons of bébés I can have but never interact with, in typical famille sim fashión!
-UGH thanks a lot for opening this gate, mom. If only you had found your love of children when I was living on cat food.
-Well it’s different when they are your children, everyone knows that.
-THAT’S NOT WHY PEOPLE SAY THAT MOM
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-Honestly, Jojό, I’m prouder of taking down your répugnant suitόrs than I am of graduating with honors!
-Aww Wyatt <3
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-And if I have to souffrir through a childless existence to be with mon amour, so be it (:
-Aw- wait what?!
-Really, c’est bien, Jojό, marriage is all about compromise, nό? I mean, not that I would know since we’re not even married yet!
-Wyatt we’ve been here for 3 hours.
-My point précisément.. C’est bien though!
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-Can’t believe I’m saying this but I really regret murdering Ti-Ning. 
That makes two of us, Jo. Honestly even Francis would be better than this. Family sim spouse??? Tf was I thinking. 
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Ah, some things never change <3 It’s a new day and someone very special passes by our lot..
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UGH NO not you asshole, once again delivering bills at the worst possible time.
-Miss me bitch?? Lolol
ONE OF THESE DAYS DAGMAR. ONE OF THESE DAYS ISTG
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No, it’s mismatched beard townie, whose regular outfit is simply iconic, and he’s waving at me! What a sweetheart! TAKE SOME NOTES DAGMAR YOU FROZEN-FACED FREAK
-Umm he’s actually waving at me, moron.
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-WRONG, he’s waving at me!
Ok it literally doesn’t matter who he’s waving at. 
-Well c’est moi. 
OK WHATEVER WYATT GOD. Just go off to work in a position you’re criminally unqualified for and try not to die ok??
-Why would I mourir?
Hm let’s see, maybe because you’re a ‘SWAT Team Leader’ straight out of college with a shocking lack of skill points?? Jfc college degrees in this game are so fucking op it’s legit making me resentful of my sims.
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In other news, major dicks Sophie and Victor have started constantly beating each other up and the only thing surprising about this development is that it took this long. Honestly these fights are peak #TeamNoOne. Please note Alegra who continues to give 0 fucks @ the bloodshed. What a gal <3
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Burning with religious fervor, fundamentalist nutjob Sophie emerges victorious!
-I WALK WITH GOD BITCH
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Tears. Literal tears. Victor is the most unbelievable creature I have ever played.
-The rampant violence in this house is a violation of human rights! I AM OUTTA HERE
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Literally still cannot believe this happened, like the sheer NERVE is killing me. Victor has started every fight he’s ever been in for an astounding total of 40-50 fights, and as you all know he almost always wins. Like this one was what? The fourth one he lost?? AND YET HE RUNS AWAY LIKE HE’S THE VICTIM I HATE/LOVE HIM SO MUCH
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Meanwhile this happens which, of course. Leave it to me to finally get a chance card right for the only sim who doesn’t even deserve the job he currently has.
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..Police Chief Wyatt reporting for duty! And crime increased 80% overnight. 
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In actual good and not lawsuit-waiting-to happen news, Wyatt brought Amanda, Vic’s only friend/lesbian crush with him! Amanda has the distinct honor of being literally the only non-Union non-Jojo person Vic has ever genuinely liked and hasn’t had an affair with. YET THAT IS.
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Man, these are some fat fucking flies. I’m talking 10 plagues of Egypt teas. 
-I KNOW, where the fuck is Komei, what are we paying him for?
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-I’m over here honey, talking to my least favorite son for the second time in my life, since apparently he’s sticking around.
-Yes, thanks for requesting a recount of the heir vote, dad. I will remember it when I decide where to scatter your ashes. 
-I TOLD YOU I WANT THEM MIXED WITH THE CAT LITTER 
Ugh Komei, please stop trying to bond with your son and do something productive instead-
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-like finally convincing Neo to bang Sophie. She has refused 3 TIMES because there’s a rule I have to earn kittens by suffering. I mean Alegra refusing to procreate with Victor made sense, it was Victor, wtf is Sophie’s excuse? Waiting for marriage?
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ABOUT TIME
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YAS. CAT GEN 3 ON THE WAY. Human gen 3 will have to wait till I’m in the mood to deal with screaming infants aka it might take a while.
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The science career FINALLY SHOWS UP after 5 fucking days, jfc. Love how Wyatt’s dumb ass started as a swat team LEADER but Jojo who has half the skills maxed starts as a science teacher. Also love the idea of Jojo as a teacher in general, I mean just imagine having him teach you science in high school. I would literally drop out.
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Jojo returns from work, brings this rando with him and doesn’t get promoted. We can’t all be Wyatt I guess! We’re not completely broke anymore tho so..
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It is time.
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Gunther, Melody and Max Flexor on one side..
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Craig, Brit Brit, Ti-Ning and Daniel on the other. What a bunch of assholes, Craig obviously excluded. Remember him? I invited him because he and Jojo are still semi-friends thinking he wouldn’t show up and yet here he is! What a good guy. 
-It’s at moments like this, watching your high school boyfriend get married.. that you really get to thinking..
Awww.
-..there but for the grace of god go I.
Less awww. You’re not wrong tho, definitely dodged a sociopathic bullet..
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..not everyone is that lucky. WE GET IT WYATT YOU’RE CRAZY AND IN LOVE
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-Mon bien adoré, I vow to aimer and honόr you and not cheat on you again or at least be more discrete about it <3
-And I vow not to kill you and feed you to the cats for as long as we both shall live <3 
Ah, true love, you guys. 
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Too bad half our guests are inside dancing-
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-OR HAVING COMPLETELY INAPPROPRIATE AND UNTIMELY THOUGHTS. TI-NING SERIOUSLY GO TO HELL. I WAS ROOTING FOR YOU WE WERE ALL ROOTING FOR YOU HOW DARE YOU
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Well at least Vic is excited which is more than I can say for Gunther who is literally LOOKING THE OTHER WAY. 
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Time to cut the cake with the sky as our only witness, since everyone has taken a plate from the buffet and fucked off inside. Seriously WORST GUESTS EVER 
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Not one to be outdone by his guests’ questionable behavior, Wyatt takes the time to remind us who he really is. 
-And n'est-ce pas forget it!
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Despite all the obvious problems, like one of the grooms literally going to sleep, our party score is ‘good time’ which is a truly rare and exciting occurrence. With less than a minute left I’m feeling pretty confident that nothing can ruin this wedding!
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Weirdly no one has touched the champagne even though sims in general are obsessed with it?? My best guess is everyone is at a loss for words at having to toast this union and who can blame them tbh. Thankfully Daniel steps up and I find it super sweet because I’ve forgotten that he and Wyatt are mortal enemies and it’s only by chance they haven’t beaten each other up on this instance like they have countless times before.
-Let’s all raise a glass to my beloved brother, Jojo, who generously woke up to attend his own wedding reception! Just one of many examples of his fine, giving character. Too bad he’s committing his life to a complete waste of space adulterous loser like Wyatt, who I’m not even convinced is really french, since his ability to speak and understand english fluctuates according to convenience. Man, I promised myself I wouldn’t cry, but this choice in spouse is just too tragic. Oh well! To Jojo!
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NOICE, still a good time. SO CLOSE
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AND YET SO FAR. Goddammit do you two mind killing each other on your own time and not literally 10 seconds before our wedding ends??
-DIE WHORE, THIS WILL TEACH YOU TO STEAL MY MAN
-THAT’S MY LINE SLUTBAG
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-HA! ZUMBA, BITCH
-Wow, so glad I woke up for this, really got my bloodlust going! 
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Indeed a roaring success if there ever was one. I mean how can this night possibly get any better?
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.............of course.
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Oh nice, I remembered to install an alarm for once! I’m also desperately trying to wake up Wyatt thinking that he’s fucking CHIEF OF POLICE so he might prove useful in this situation..
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..especially since we get this cop of a completely untrustworthy Bieber hairstyle. Talk about striking fear in the heart.
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Sadly it turns out that Wyatt could not give less of a shit that we’re getting robbed and picks this moment to head for wedding buffet leftovers-
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-while Bieber cop prevails! This robber is awesomely named Russ Bear btw and I wish that was my name, sounds like a slavic medieval folkore hero. But I digress. Please prepare yourselves because our first robbery is about to take a dark turn.
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-Ehh, you get at a certain level on la force, you just become desensitized to la criminalité..
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-Oh don’t worry Wyatt, I totally understand.. I mean I’ve robbed so many houses in my time, I hardly blink anymore..
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-So it looks like you and I are not so different after all.. ;)
.............
.....................
............................why. why has the universe chosen me for the greatest suffering the world has ever known. i try and i try but incestuous relationships just keep sprawling like mythical strangler vines. i bet this wouldn’t happen to someone named Russ Bear. fml
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w-wolf-nanny · 4 years ago
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Random headcannons and some possible questions being asked
—————————————————————————————
Biohazard is actually baren and can not carry or sire any sparklets
Bio’s neck fur actually covers up his acid sack, if his fur was removed from the area then it was very clear to see a noticeable bright green bulge at the base of his lower neck
Biohazard is somewhat acid proof, his face along with the middle of his servo are such. His tail and his neck fur produce a special oil that is acid proof and water resistant. Special shampoo must be used when washing his fur, it makes the oils less dense and allows him to actually clean the areas
Swiftstep in lore is always fated to die early in life, due to her overact system. She makes it to somewhat early adulthood/ late youngling hood
Wildwest And Folktale actually have a older brother named Powerhouse, he works mostly hands on jobs so he is away most of the time. He lives besides the care center so that he can be closer to his youngest siblings
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🐺Q: How come Biohazard seems to talk a lot in roleplays?though In his bio it says that he is a selective speaker?
❤️A: That is somewhat true, Orginally I tried to keep Biohazard as a quiet mech in roleplays but overtime I felt like it’s a bit conflicting to try and make the roleplay interesting while not having my main oc speak. So I made it so that Biohazard does speak more then he somewhat should, he mostly talks by explains stuff and such and keeps feelings and personal information to a minimum. In lore, Biohazard is mostly a background character along with any sparklets in his care
🐺Q: It says that Biohazard is scared/conflicted about being in relationships? Can there still be a romantic relationship with my CC/ OC involving him?
❤️A: Of course! Biohazard is only scared about being in a romantic relationship because of his past, so if you CC or OC helps him work through it or even proves to Biohazard that they could trust them. Then there is no problem, now I will have to state that in my lore Biohazard doesn’t get involved with anyone and any/each roleplay is in its AU verse of my lore. Each AU is separate to each account
🐺Q: Are any of your ocs related/ or have a relationship to any cannon characters?
❤️A: At the moment only two of my ocs have a family relationship, that being Noble and Honor. In my lore Honor is actually the creation of Soundwave and Noble, I base Soundwave more of his prime design when I was creating Honor. So Honor had a very lanky body and a screen like face, it also explains why she never truly speaks ( asides from her voice record clips and her thousands of memes downloaded into her private files ) Now I have to admit that Noble has a very rocky relationship with Soundwave, they met being prewar era and only stayed together for a short amount of time before the war started. Noble doesn’t like talking and mentioning Soundwave, Honor doesn’t fully remember who her co-creator is so even if she met Soundwave. It’s unlikely she would actually know who he is. I always want to mention that Swiftstep was actually orginal Optimus’s kid but I scraped the idea later on because I felt it didn’t fit fully with her character
🐺 Q: Does Swiftstep and Honor have a romantic relationship?
❤️A: In lore yes, i felt like they would be a good match together. Now roleplay wise, I don’t really like the idea of Swiftstep or Honor being in any relationship romantically with anyone else. But I can easily shift that opinion if I had more roleplays involving older Swiftstep but I haven’t....
🐺Q: Will we can any backstories on how the sparklets got into Biohazard’s care?
❤️A: It’s sadly unlikely, there are many sparklings and younglings and such in Biohazard’s care that it will take a long time to write up backstories to all of them. Though for main sparklets like Swiftstep or Titan, I might write something brief for them but i will have to think about it
🐺Q: Would there be possible that my CC or OC could have sparklets with Biohazard even though he is baren?
❤️A: No, for two reasons. One being that it’s part of Biohazard’s character that I feel like should stick with him and two even if he could have his own creations, it’s very likely Biohazard wouldn’t agree to it since he basically see the sparklets in his care as his own. I mean why would he want even more little monsters running around
🐺Q: Will we get more background on Twister’s and Railgun’s relationship?
❤️A: Yes! It’s take me some time to fully have a solid idea of their relationship, I am currently trying to figure on the motivation on Raingun’s distancing himself emotionally and physically from his family asides from him being part of Megatron’s cause
🐺Q: So is Biohazard truly part of the Autobots?
❤️A: No, he only ‘joined’ because of him wanting to help the care center, which was part of the Autobot alliance so for him to work there he had be part of the cause. His badge was actually a tag on his collar that he later on got rid off but he kept the collar anyway
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shiisiln · 7 years ago
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The Pirate’s Life For Me
Finally, I’ve gotten the last of my request fics done. A big apology to @princeasimdiya12 for taking SO long to finish it. ^_^”
It took me a while to beat the idea into shape in my head, but it’s been a real joy to work on. Little Seto and Joey just interact so well, and Mokuba is, of course, majorly adorable.
The title is taken from The Mountain Goats song Jenny, because it’s a song about escape, and finding something you need in someone else. And maybe you’re not doing the smart, responsible think, but maybe it’s what you need to do to stay alive.
(Trigger warning for heavily implied child abuse, homeless orphans, and just general children-in-realistically-dangerous-situations.)
900 cc's of raw, whining power No outstanding warrants for my arrest Hi diddle dee dee, goddamn The pirate's life for me
Joey dropped the garbage bag he was carrying and stared.
The boy currently hanging half-in, half-out of the dumpster behind Joey’s apartment building stared back, his eyes wide and round.
The two of them watched each other for a long moment, silent and tense.
Joey’s heart beat frantically as he waited, wondering what the heck this kid was doing, and what he was going to DO once one of them broke the silence and made a move.
He was wearing a blue vest over a white shirt, and brown pants; all of which looked dirty and worn. His browning hair was sticking up in places like he hadn’t bothered to comb it since he woke up, and his big, surprised eyes were a shocking shade of blue.
Joey was sure he’d never seen him around the apartment complex before; what kind of weirdo went around diving into other people’s dumpsters?
The dumpster boy was the first to move, sliding back to his feet on solid ground. He walked slowly backwards, his eyes trained on Joey’s face and his knees bent, like he was waiting for the perfect moment to run but also bracing for an attack.
Or TO attack. Joey reached for the garbage bag again, suddenly feeling the need for something to use as a weapon.
There was a sudden, sharp huff of breath, and Joey realized that Dumpster Boy wasn’t alone. there was another, smaller boy crouching behind him, reaching up to grab the hem of his shirt. His long black hair was wild and unruly around his face, revealing only two wide, blue eyes that stared nervously up at Joey.
He looks like he’s Serenity’s age, Joey thought, and emotion welled up in his heart.
What were they doing out on their own like this? And digging through the trash- were they homeless kids, looking for food?
They looked just about ready to run, and Joey was struck with a sudden, frantic desire to help them.
“Wait,” he said, and both boys froze, staring at him nervously. “J-just wait here, I’ll bring you some food from inside!”
He raced off, hoping desperately that they wouldn’t run away while he was gone. They both looked so scared- and so skinny, they obviously hadn’t had a good meal in forever.
He snuck back into his apartment as quietly as he could, praying that his dad wouldn’t wake up and catch him. He’d be furious if he knew Joey was feeding some kids outside like they were stray cats.
He grabbed a couple packets of instant noodles, some chips, and an old apple he’d found at the back of his fridge, stuffing them into a grocery bag.
There was a noise from the sitting room and he froze, staring over his shoulder. He stayed like that for a long time, waiting to see if it was his father waking up.
Dad was… he wasn’t a bad guy or anything. But he was a mean drunk, and he yelled at Joey a lot. Joey was sure that if he could make himself smaller and quieter, he’d stop, but he never quite managed it. He was too loud, too big, to rambunctious by nature.
He didn’t really mind. He missed his mom a lot, but it was better for her to be with Serenity. Dad had been even meaner to her than he was to Joey.  
And Joey would take any kind of punishment from his dad to keep him from being mean to Serenity anymore.
Finally, he figured it had been long enough that he could relax, and he tiptoed back out. As soon as he shut the door behind him, as gently and quietly as possible, he raced down the hallway and out the fire escape, the stairs rattling under his feet as he pounded down them.
The two boys were, miraculously, still there when he got back. They seemed to be arguing with each other in whispers, and they both looked up like startled deer when he arrived.
He gave them a wide grin. “See? I got this for you!” he said, holding up the grocery bag.
Dumpster boy narrowed his eyes at him, obviously suspicious. His hands were clenched at his sides, and he seemed about ready to take a swing at Joey if he got too close.
But then the little one tugged on his sleeve. Looking down at the boy’s big, pleading eyes, the expression on Dumpster Boy’s face softened, and he sighed heavily.
“Not here,” he said, and motioned for Joey to follow him down the alley.
He did, feeling a strange sense of satisfaction at getting them to trust him enough for this.
~
“I'm Joey,” he said enthusiastically. “What are your names?
“I’m Mokuba,” the little kid said, crumbling a handful of instant noodles in his chubby hand and stuffing them into his mouth. “And this is my big brother, Seto.”
Dumpster boy continued to watch Joey closely,  his blue eyes narrowed in suspicion. He didn’t speak but he ate voraciously, as though afraid that the food was going to get up and run away from him.
Joey noticed he wasn’t quite eating the equal half Mokuba had insisted he take, however; he kept surreptitiously pushing bits and pieces over to his younger brother. Mokuba was so caught up in talking with Joey that he didn’t notice.
He’s a good big brother, Joey thought with approval.
“What are you doing out here?” Joey asked, gesturing around at the crumbling, abandoned bar they were sitting in the middle of.
He’d gotten a little creeped out as they led him down alleys and side-streets to get here, worried in the back of his mind that they were a couple of junior serial killers and he was their next victim.
But as soon as they sat down behind the bar and attacked their food with the kind of ferocity that only came with hunger, he became sure that they were just a couple of kids who had seriously needed his help.
“We ran away from the orphanage,” Mokuba said.
Seto gave him a Look. “Don’t say that!” he hissed.
“Why not?” Mokuba asked. “We did.”
“We don’t know if we can trust this kid of not,” Seto said.
“Hey!” Joey said, incredulously. “I gave you all this food, didn’t I?”
“Yeah!” Mokuba said. “Joey’s good Seto, don’t worry. You won’t tell on us, will you?” he turned back to Joey, his eyes wide and trusting.
Joey smiled. “Of course not. I’m no tattletale.”
Seto didn’t look convinced, but he settled down and kept eating, so Joey decided to ignore him for the moment.
“Why did you run away?” Joey asked Mokuba. “If you were at the orphanage, you knew you didn’t have anywhere else to go, right?”
“They kept trying to split us up,” Mokuba said, and looked sadly down at his lap.
Joey swallowed, anger and sadness welling up inside of him. He knew how that felt, all too painfully close.
“Seto- they kept saying how special he is,” Mokuba continued. “And I’m… I’m not, so they didn’t want me.”
“They were wrong.”
Joey was a little shocked to hear Seto speak up, after keeping quiet for so long. His voice was low but firm, and as he spoke, he pressed the last of his potato chips into Mokuba’s hands.
“You’re as special as me, Mokie,” he said. “Those people were just stupid.”
That make Mokuba smile. “You’re right, they were pretty stupid,” he said, and ate the chips.
“So you just… live here now?” Joey asked.
“Yup!” Mokuba said. “It gets kind of cold at night, but it’s better than being split up.”
“But how do you eat?” Joey asked. “And aren’t you supposed to be in school?”
“We don’t need school. Seto’s a genius,” Mokuba said proudly. “And food- well…”
There was an awkward moment of silence as they both looked towards Seto.
He scowled at Joey. “Don’t give me that look. There’s no shame in digging through the trash for food if your only other option is starving.”
“That sounds gross,” Joey said.
“It’s not going to be like this forever,” Seto said, his voice cold and determined. “There’s a chess tournament going on next month that I plan to enter. The prize money is one hundred thousand yen.”
Joey couldn’t  contain his gasp of awe at hearing such a large number.”Are you serious?”
“I told you, my brother’s a genius!” Mokuba said. “He can beat any adult at chess. Or any game. He’s amazing.”
Joey would believe that when he saw proof, but he didn’t want to upset Mokuba by saying it outloud.  “But wait- will they even let a kid like you in?”
“They’ll have to,” Seto said grimly. “I’ll make them”
Joey had to choke back a fit of laughter at the idea of this tiny, scrawny ten-year-old facing down the judges and demanding that they allow him into the tournament.
But then Seto turned his piercing, icy eyes towards him, and the laughter died in his mouth.
There was no trace of hesitation on his face; this was the look of someone who had been forced into a corner, and intended to fight their way out.
Joey couldn’t help but admire that.
He sat up straight. “You know what? I’m gonna help you.”
The two brothers stared up at him; Seto shocked and scowling, Mokuba hopeful.
“Really?” Mokuba asked.
At the same time, Seto asked, “Why?”
Joey shrugged. “Just cause I’m a nice guy. Hasn’t anyone ever told you not to look a gift horse in the mouth?”
That was a bald-faced lie, of course- it was because when he looked at the two of them, he couldn’t stop thinking about Serenity. His heart ached when he thought about what he would have done in their situation; being separated from his sister was horrible, but at least he knew she was safe and happy with Mom, and he’d get to see her again someday.
If he’d been forced to see her left behind at an orphanage, with no idea if she’d be taken care of or whether he’d ever see her again…
Well, he probably would have done exactly what Seto had done.
Seto crossed his arms. “And why exactly should we trust you?”
“Why wouldn’t you trust me?” Joey asked. “Don’t I look trustworthy?”
“Don’t ask questions you’re not gonna like the answers to,” Seto said dryly.
“Hey!” Joey shouted.
Mokuba rolled his eyes. “Seto, stop being rude.”
“I’m not being rude, I’m being careful,” Seto insisted.
Joey sighed. “Well, if you’re not interested, you don’t have to take me up on it. All I was gonna do was sneak you food anyway; it’s your loss if you don’t wanna get in on that.”
He stood up to leave dramatically, but Mokuba bolted forward and before Joey knew what had happened, he was being held in place by a viselike grip around his waist.
“Don’t go!” he pleaded, looking up at Joey with big puppydog eyes. “Seto didn’t mean it. Please.”
Joey’s heart melted, and he smiled and patted Mokuba on the head. “Don’t worry, I wasn’t gonna let your grouchy brother scare me off.”
He looked up at Seto and raised his eyebrows. “So? You gonna make your kid brother cry because you don’t wanna trust me?”
Seto stared at him for a long, tense moment, his arms folded and his eyebrows drawn down into a tight scowl. Then he sighed heavily, and dropped his hands to his sides. “Fine. But if you let anyone else know you’re here, I’ll kill you. Got it?”
“Duly noted,” Joey said, then let out a pained ‘Oof!” as Mokuba’s arms squeezed around his waist.
“Thank you!” Mokuba said enthusiastically, grinning up at him.
Joey couldn’t help but grin back, his heart swelling at the kid’s affection. “No prob, little man. Hey, how about I get you guys hamburgers tomorrow?”
“Hamburgers!” Mokuba crowed, as Seto rubbed his temple in irritation.
Joey had no idea how he was gonna afford something like that. He’d probably have to steal money from his dad, and he’d get the butt-whooping of his life if he was caught.
But somehow, seeing Mokuba’s smile made it feel completely worth it.
~
Joey woke bolt upright at the stroke of midnight to the sound of something cracking off the window.
He fought his way out of the covers and crawled over to stare out, wondering blearily what could have made that noise.
A terrible, shivery fear lit up his spine; was it some kind of ghost or demon?
After a moment wrestling with his own fear, he stood up to peer out through the window- and was shocked to see the faint silhouette of Seto on the street below, waving up at him.
Ever since that day at the abandoned bar, Joey had been helping the orphaned brothers out. He couldn’t do much, but he smuggled them snacks after school, and occasionally leftovers from the rare occasions his dad actually cooked.
He’d also given them some blankets, because it was going to get cold soon, and he’d leant Mokuba his gameboy, feeling sorry for the poor kid, having to sit around all day while his brother searched for food and money in the streets.
On weekdays and evenings after school he’d come and basically babysit Mokuba while Seto prepared for the upcoming chess tournament. Joey couldn’t help but admire how quickly Seto read the thick textbooks he’d swiped from the local shopping center, and the seemingly inexhaustible fountain of knowledge he could recite off from the top of his head at any moment.
(But it did piss him off that Seto had won every single training match they’d had together, even with Mokuba (who Joey also hadn't managed to beat,) hanging over his shoulder and giving him tips. One of these days, Joey vowed to beat Seto at some game, ANY game, and he’d laugh in his face when he managed it.)
But Seto had never approached his apartment complex after that first day. Instead he insisted that Joey come to them, probably worried what would happen if the police or concerned neighbors saw him talking to Joey for too long.
If he was here, something must be seriously wrong. The first thing Joey could think of was something happening to Mokuba, and that thought chilled him so bad he woke all the way up.
He waved back at Seto, indicating he’d be right down, and rushed to get dressed before sneaking out of his room to the fire escape. His sneakers had barely hit the pavement before Seto jogged up to him, his usual scowl even deeper and scowlier than usual.
“Why'd you have to wake me up?” Joey complained, trying not to show how freaked out he was. “And if that window got broken, dad would-”
“We're leaving, “ Seto blurted out.
Joey blinked slowly. “...What?”
“Mokuba and I,” Seto clarified. “We’re leaving today.”
“What?! Why?” Joey demanded.
“People have been snooping around the bar,” Seto said. “I think someone saw us last night. So we’re leaving before they can find us and take us back to the orphanage.”
“But-” Joey found himself at a loss for words; this was all happening too fast.
“Just be quiet and listen,” Seto snapped. Then he took a deep breath, and said, “Come with us.”
Joey opened his mouth, but no words came out. He just stared at Seto, shocked.
Seto rubbed the back of his neck. “Trust me, I hate admitting this, but… I can’t take care of Mokuba on my own. There’s not- I hate leaving him on his own, in case something happens. But it’s usually too dangerous to take him along with me when I got to find food or money. I need someone else to look after him.”
“And you- you want me to do that?” Joey asked. He had to admit, it was a real surprise; Seto had met every attempt at making friends with suspicion and sarcasm. Every time he so much looked at him, Joey got the distinct feeling that he was wishing he had never appeared in his and his brother’s life.
Why was he asking for his help now?
“There’s no one else to ask!” Seto snapped. He looked mad, he looked- he looked like he was on the brink of tears. He looked desperate, his hands shaking and the dark circles beneath his eyes even more prominent than usual. “I hate this. I hate that I can’t do it on my own, but- but Mokuba… if something happens to him because I can’t take care of him, then I’ll just- I’ll-”
Joey stepped forward and put his hands on Seto’s shoulders. Dimly, he realized that this was the first time he’d ever actually touched the other boy, but he was more focused on other things. “Ok, I'll do it.”
Seto blinked up at him, surprised. “... Really?”
“Of course! “ Joey said. “Just give me a few minutes-I need to pack some supplies before dad can wake up. I'll bring food, and some more blankets, and-”
“Wait, wait.” Seto interrupted him, pushing him back a little. “Are you sure? It’s not going to be easy.”
“I'm sure,” Joey said.
“You'll go hungry. And winter is coming soon,” Seto warned him. “And sometimes- sometimes I have to steal stuff to keep us fed. Are you willing to do that?”
Joey shrugged. “It's what we gotta do.”
Seto eyed him, frowning, for a long, quiet moment. Then finally, he asked, “Why do you even care about us?”
Joey didn’t even hesitate on his answer. “Because I know what it’s like to get your family split up. And I’d do anything to keep that from happening to you.”
The other boy looked shocked. Then, after a moment, his expression softened and became more vulnerable than Joey had ever seen him look before. “...I’m sorry.”
Joey sighed, rubbing at the back of his neck. “My sister… she needs surgery for her eyes. That’s why Mom and Dad broke up. But if I can  join the gaming circuit with you, I’ll be able to pay for her operation, and we can live together again.”
Seto watched him for another long moment then smikred. “That’s pretty ambitious of you, monkey. If you can make ten bucks off a game of go-fish, I’ll be shocked.”
“Hey!” Joey yelped, shaking his fist. “You wanna say that again?”
“Shhh, Joey, your dad!” Seto hushed him.
“Whoops, sorry.” Joey just squeezed his arm.  “C’mon, help me get stuff out of the fire escape. Dad’s passed out on the couch next to some empty bottles, we should be able to sneak plenty of supplies out before he can notice.”
Seto climbed up after him. As they reached the top of the fire escape stairs, he tugged gently on Joey’s sleeve.
When Joey turned around, he had his arms folded and was scowling off to into the distance
“Listen closely,” he said. “Because I’m never going to say this again. … Thank you.”
Joey blinked at him a couple of times, then grabbed his hand, smirking back at him. “You’re welcome, dumpster boy.”
“Excuse me, what did you just say?” Seto hissed in outrage, but Joey disappeared back into the apartment, swallowing his gleeful laughter as he went.
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breezytealy · 7 years ago
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Can you pleeeeeeeease do Trunks for the character thing?! Pretty please?! 💛😊
(msg refs this post)HI NONNIE! (Who are youuuuu~~~~?) I’ve had half of a response in my drafts forever but finally got time to finish! Wow, it’s almost like everyone knows exactly the characters I want to write about :’DDone Goten, have Marron after this post…I’m going to do this mostly about present timeline Trunks rather than future timeline because that means I get the Terrible Trio done in these asks.Why I like themHe’s a little cheeky turd! Obviously I’m talking about Present rather than Future Trunks (who is a real softie). Trunks is such a manipulative kid, getting Goten to go along with his plans (in Buu saga Goten’s too young to argue back effectively, can see Goten just being chill later though). It makes sense he’d just expect people to follow his lead though. He lives in a house with staff and everyone probably agreeing with his Mum out of respect - and his Dad out of fear. He is a little full of himself and I love it. (More after cut)
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Why I don’t…I’m legit trying to think of things and I can’t… if he was a real kid in my charge I would be so irritated by him. (Also Super has him too small, my eternal complaint).Favorite episode (scene if movie)The Mighty Mask stuff gets me every time :’D Trunks calling the shots and poor Goten just resigned…
Favorite season/movieBuu saga, and Broly movies for him just being such a rude shit, flipping the bird, the family hand sign.
Favorite lineLess a line and more a state of mind; every time in GT he got exasperated at Goku and Pan behaving like kids was my favourite. We know he’s a bit of a slacker in his presidential role in GT, preferring to go out flying (who wouldn’t) but he is ultimately quite responsible as an adult and adulty. 
Favorite outfitFuture Trunks not present Trunks but same body so stands to reason, that green jumper F.Trunks wore in the Black arc looked pretty good on him! I do like his green gi as a kid but not sure where that comes from? I wonder if he’ll switch to Vegeta’s Saiyan uniform when he’s older or keep the gi  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯  
OTPI am a stickler for canon ships (it’s like a personal challenge, don’t hold anyone else to it) so it looks like Trunks x Mai is going to play out in current timeline. I know a lot of people don’t like it, and even those that do usually stick with the Future timeline. But I find it /fascinating/ how Mai’s brain would work (it should be going through all the childhood developmental stages again) and how that relationship would develop. She must tell him her situation at some point. I picture Mai rejecting his advances as a young teen, and then explaining why before he goes to college when he’s old enough to understand. I’d see a bit of a distancing after that for him in particular to process though coming back together after as they do see something in each other, especially as he grows more responsible. With the responsibility I do see him as a little of an “old soul” for lack of a better term - (and I might be projecting my own partner onto him here but) the kind of guy who starts reading adult papers as a teen and is clued up about politics and genuinely likes music twenty years too old for him, so they just work well together. He skips the party stage and goes straight to the boxset on sofa stage.
I know a relationship between two people where there’s a huge age gap (it started when she was 18 and he was late 30s) and it’s the strongest marriage I know. Whilst that’s not as big a gap as Trunks x Mai honestly if it works then I don’t see a problem. Many of the problems with age gap relationships come down to power differentials and people being in different stages of their lives physically. If these aren’t there then who gives a monkey’s? As I said on the Goten one I do see some TruTen happening at some point due to the intensity of fusion but not sticking into a traditional relationship. I see Trunks as a true “all or nothing” prince charming romantic type (serial monogamist) and Goten not being able to maintain the intense romantic tendencies needed for something like that.
BrotpGood old Goten can it be anyone else? I do see them as having some form of intense soulmate-like relationship though which is basically an OTP but not in the standard way TruTen is depicted. Looking at them interacting you’d probably think they’re a married couple bickering half the time because the effect fusion has of making you see someone else more of an extension of yourself than separate. Sounds harsh but I actually see them as old men and can see one dying of heartbreak if the other goes first
Head Canon I have Goten being effortlessly friendly with people as he’s grown up in a mixed environment with people of all classes (he knows rich people from CC, he knows Gods and how to behave, interacts at markets with normal people). Trunks has been stuck at CC and so is used to the power differential in most interactions. I can see that really messing with him and it just… manifesting as him being an unintentional ass as he gets older (though I think his interactions with future Trunks might have started to soften that). Maybe insisting on going to public high school for a couple of years and it just not going the way he plans (you can’t organise people. Goten yes because he just rolls with things but not everyone else). Making few friends, growing suspicious of people and their motives because they’re just after money or influence… social stuff is more complicated than he thought. He can’t have been great to CC workers as a kid really, since he treated the place as a playground. I have him insisting on taking on a gap year before college (that way he can go with Goten (kinda forcing Goten to go in a way)) and wanting to spend it travelling in space. Vegeta and Bulma have other ideas and make him do a year’s internship at CC, rotating through departments and starting with the most aggrieved - maintenance. The staff treat it as a hazing and Trunks learns humility and how to interact with people better, they grow to like him, and when he takes up a position at CC after college there’s far less animosity towards him being gifted a management position. He’s still not that good in social situations without a framework like work to work with and he can come across a little awkward. He’s best when he just relaxes and is a really good earnest guy and easy to talk to then, but he’s more often second-guessing how some people are going to behave and how he’s coming across that he’s a bit hard to interact with with that wall up. When he’s chill he’s quite witty and is full of puns. Some of his jokes can be a little dark (mostly born from having a dad that threatens to murder you for every little thing) and he’s the kind of guy with intrusive thoughts (”I could kill everyone in this room”) but not the type to act on them obviously. It’s where Gotenks gets his mean, slightly cocky streak from. I see him taking on a lot of responsibility, seeing himself as the group leader and making the final decision on strategy for fights that the kids take part in. They look to him for it. Really though Goten is the glue that holds the group together and without Goten softening things Trunks’ leadership can be a little hostile. Still, he takes a lot on his shoulders and feels the weight of it often. He’s an analyst, good for engineering but breaking down every little problem and possibility can be tiring. He’s the person most concerned about keeping the public from finding out about the superpowers and makes them all use secure chats and code names when talking, he wears a beanie hat in public to hide his hair (rarely works). Public see him as a man of mystery though and have decided he’s some brooding amazing guy instead of a paranoid dork. That frown he inherits from his Dad is more from worry than his Dad’s trademark irritation. He tries to do too much with the business and training and can be constantly tired, running himself ragged, Bra takes some stuff off of him to help. Eventually he opens up the sword school with Goten after Gohan’s book’s released, leaving CC day-to-day management to Bra (who is far better at marketing and being extraverted and all that shizzle) and as they’re now open about their powers he can relax and enjoy himself and focus on spreading the responsibility through a group of enthusiastic recruits, aged 39. 
Unpopular opinionBeing from the UK I had the Blue Water GT dub. I haven’t played the games very often and I’m more likely to rewatch GT than Cell Games so my internal Trunks Voice is either KaiserNeko’s from Dragon Ball Abridged or Blue Water’s Matthew_Erickson. I like Vale’s voice as I had it for Future Trunks but I just… every time I write dialogue with adult Trunks it’s one of the two softer voices ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
A wishBecause the kids haven’t aged in Super we’re missing out on the “generic teen phase” for the kids. Having Trunks rolling around in an unwashed hoodie talking about “how hard my life is” and “no one understands me and my genius” with all the self-awareness of a jam jar would be amazing. 
An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happenA bit silly but please don’t have him be cool. Future Trunks was cool because of his skills and character rather than actually trying to be, in reality he was a bit of a cute dork and I hope that happens. The idea of Trunks trying really hard with interactions and failing (like trying to impress Mai with the sword) is funny, I just couldn’t take the blandness of him actually being cool with people and popular, you know? That natural charisma is more Goten’s domain to me. 
5 words to best describe themResponsible, easily-exasperated, romantic, strategist, “not good with strangers or people he knows” (to quote Father Ted)
My nickname for themI have them all referring to him a T (“Trunks” being a famous name you don’t want to bandy about in public because it would attract attention) and Goten calling him T-Dawg as some kind of ironic jibe. 
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meggannn · 7 years ago
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character name origins
this was inspired by a post I saw a few days ago that I’ve been thinking about ever since that asked people how their OCs were named. the original idea, I assume, was to reblog the post and answer in the tags/comments, but I immediately knew whatever I wrote was gonna turn out to be an essay because I overthink absolutely everything, so I decided to make my own post.
so here I go, an essay nobody else will care about but me: “how my OCs got their names in canon, and how I picked them” (unsurprisingly, Shepard’s is the longest)
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lydia shepard
> how I picked it
I was drawn to the nickname Lyd because it could pass as a name in a ME future timeline, it’s androgynous, and also monosyllabic, since I think orphans growing up would be more likely to address and know each other by words that are easier to pronounce, and stick with them into adulthood or until they chose to rebrand themselves.
(I have an old friend who goes by Lyd, who I realized later was probably a subconscious source of inspiration. my Shep is from London, and my friend was also a Londoner when we first met, something I genuinely didn’t realize until after I’d decided on Shepard’s origin story anyway. I’m sure if the friend ends up reading this there will be a significant amount of eye-rolling.)
> canon explanation
The origin of her name is wrapped up an ongoing struggle as I try to figure out what Lydia’s actual birth name is. (for the moment I’ve tentatively settled on Lijuan, tho that is subject to change. I’m almost positive I want her birth name to be Chinese, for reasons described below.) my idea is that, after her parents lost her (another long story), years of being shuffled around from orphanages to shelters to the streets shortened her birth name until it became mostly unrecognizable. ‘Lijuan’ became ‘Lyd’ which she later extrapolated as an adult, and assumed her full name should just be ‘Lydia.’
this is where I start thinking way too deeply into stuff that doesn’t really matter, so bear with me or feel free to skip ahead. Lyd’s name is is also wrapped up in my struggles to incorporate what I think we’d naturally see in 200 years in the future: most of the East being taken over almost entirely by Western influences as human beings become more biracial. I think Lyd’s parents would make a conscious choice to name her something traditional to their language instead of subscribing to a Western name, as a small attempt to keep their culture alive. (were they xenophobic? ...possibly. I’m tossing the idea around.) so the fact that Lyd ends up taking a Western name anyway (an English-speaking city with mostly white faces pronouncing a foreign name) is quite sad but I also meant to symbolize the cultural dysphoria she faces as a POC in England wrapped up in her experiences as a homeless child on the streets and a gangster out of necessity, and later as a famous soldier unwittingly becoming a part of galactic military space where humans as a species also experience extreme cultural dysphoria. (haha, me? projecting my identity problems onto my characters? no way!)
anyway. Shepard is a name she picked for herself since she doesn’t remember her parents’ names and wouldn’t have the first clue how to look them up. (even if she did, she makes a very conscious choice not to think about her parentage. I think she’s afraid of what she’ll discover if she finds them.) I used to play with the idea that “Shepherd” was the name of someone she knew who might’ve raised or looked out for her on the streets, and on enlisting she decided to take that name for lack of any other, but due to illiteracy she ended up misspelling it. I ultimately decided that I like the sound of Shepard choosing her own name from scratch, purposefully naming herself after someone most humans can agree was brave, intelligent, and an adventurer, all things she privately wished she could be but also felt as though she was herself up for failure by aligning herself with. She was embarrassed by her private interest for traveling the universe, even though she never seriously thought she’d ever get the chance, so when picking a surname to put on her documents she decided to look into astronauts, and well... “Armstrong” was a little too obvious.
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valeria hawke
> how I picked it
I picked this name ages ago, and to be honest I’ve been falling out of love with it lately so I’ve been going by the default “Marian” as I consider other options. but I picked it because I’ve always loved the name Valerie, but it didn’t sound like a medieval name, so I looked up older versions, and found the Latin “Valeria.” I really wish there were more thought to it than that, but sadly no. 
(now as it’s been a few years since I first played DA2, I’ve grown more fond of “Marian” because some translations mark it up as “rebellion” which seems particularly appropriate for the DA2 narrative. for my own sake though, I generally like to name my OCs something to differentiate them in my own mind from the default; even though they tend to share the same traits I know everyone views the default differently, so giving my Hawke her own name is a way of dividing the line for me between “what fandom agrees is default Hawke” vs “default Hawke with my headcanons that can essentially be called my character.” so that’s the one thing preventing me from using Marian for my Hawke, really. if it sounds like a stupid reason that’s probably because it is.)
eta: i’ve changed it to “anita” because honestly i just like that prettier. in sanskrit it means “leader” and “without guile” (ironic, considering).
> canon explanation
In the real world, it means “to be strong,” so assuming that translates to the Thedas common tongue, I liked the idea of Malcolm and Leandra naming their first kid something ridiculously sentimental. I mean, they’re the kind of romantics to fall in love despite all reason, get pregnant, run away to another country and never talk to their families again. I can definitely see them picking something cheesy for their first kid’s name (who was conceived while Malcolm was still an illegal apostate and Leandra was engaged to someone else iirc. like, come on, that’s textbook fairytale, of course it was doomed to end badly, and of course their kid was doomed to have a rough life built on their mistakes).
to my knowledge “Valeria” primarily has a history of usage in Spanish and Italian, and it’s originally Latin (since it’s from the Latin word “valere”). this jibes with my Hawke family, who is mixed because I said so. I really like the idea of Malcolm not being from Ferelden or the Marches, and that “Hawke” is a name he chose himself to blend into Ferelden; I’ve seen some headcanon he has roots in Tevinter, which is interesting, though I’ve largely settled on the idea of him being Antivan. so if Italian = Antivan, then... there we go.
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monica ryder
> how I picked it
I genuinely can’t recall the moment I decided "yes, this is the one for me” but I always knew who my facecast would be (mixed actress Lindsay Morgan). so knowing my Ryder was visibly mixed/racially ambiguous from the get-go, when I chose the name later, I think I was drawn to the fact that the name Monica has a history of use in many languages, and quite simply, I just liked how “Monica Ryder” sounds on the tongue.
> canon explanation
I think Ellen and Alec split naming the kids down the middle (Monica was probably Ellen’s pick, and Scott was Alec’s), but literally that’s all I’ve got so far, lol. (I kinda wanted to keep the name Sara as a middle name, but “Monica Sara Ryder” doesn’t sound quite right to me... I’m working on it.)
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gemma cousland
(DAO doesn’t give me any good caps and the DAI CC failed me, so please pretend this girl actually looks EA instead of a white girl after her first trip to Hot Topic, lol.)
> how I picked it
I’ve always associated the name “Gemma” with royalty for some reason, so when I started my first Origins game as a female rogue I guess I figured it was a safe, lore-compliant option and just went with it. later I realized I was probably influenced by Gemma Doyle from the Great and Terrible Beauty trilogy, which was a favorite of mine growing up.
> canon explanation
ah... I really haven’t thought of it. I don’t even have a reason for why an Asian family would be nobility in Thedas’s England equivalent, much less why they would name their kid a non-EA name if they’re the traditional sort, but not much makes sense in Thedas anyway. Gemma is Italian from the word “gem” or “jewel,” so I’ll just pretend the Couslands were that particular brand of superstitious boring noble parents that thought naming their only daughter after something shiny would mean she would have a simple life. lol.
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reyna mahariel
(I haven’t gotten around to making her in the DAI CC yet, whoops)
> how I picked it
Another one of those “it sounded nice to my ears and I had already been staring at the ‘choose your name’ screen for over ten minutes and just needed to pick something” situations. Reyna is Spanish for “queen,” but there’s not meant to be any correlation or implications there. I picked it because it honestly just sounded nice.
> canon explanation
of course the most logical follow-up question is, if Reyna is a traditionally noble European name, why give it to a Dalish elf who’s never known a speck of luxury in her life? erm... I’m gonna pull the fictional universe card and say it’s a fantasy RPG, who cares.
Reyna has a lot of variations (Raina, Reina, Regina) and “queen” is the most common meaning, but one translation marks it down as once meaning “song,” which I kind of like. so, continuing the theme of parents giving their kids symbolic names and their hopes later getting flushed down the toilet as the kids get swept up into preventing disasters and dealing with the fallout of various apocalyptic scenarios... I run with the idea that Reyna’s parents wanted her to grow up as a musician or Dalish equivalent of a bard, which Reyna tossed out the window as soon as she picked up a bow and decided she was going to be a huntress, thank you very much.
--
THIS GOT WAY TOO LONG AND IF YOU ACTUALLY READ ANY OF IT, GENUINE PROPS TO YOU
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gilbertandanne · 8 years ago
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                                                     Partition
A/N: Takes place two years before the events in ‘Crash Course’, so you don’t have to read it to understand what’s going on.  I tried to interlace some plot points revealed in CC and it’s sequel, Infinite, but again, you don’t have to read them to understand what’s going on.
Song: ‘Partition’ by Queen B
Pairing: Rucas with brief mentions of J/M and F/S
Rated: M
Word Count: 14,221 (I still don’t know HOW it ended up this long)
Totally dedicating this one to @jenn0bi bc without her calling me out on not using this song (after I promised), this would never have been written. I *really* hope you like it, Jenn. <3
Maya groaned as she cradled her phone between her ear and her shoulder.  She hated it when he made sense.  The most annoying part of it was that her boyfriend always made sense—especially when it came to the subject of his niece.  “It’s been two years,” she reasoned as she reached for her concealer.
“Yeah, but we both know that she’s different now.  She’s not the same person she was in high school.  She’s not the same person she was since they broke up.”
Maya cringed.  She hated it when he used her words against her.  “But it’s Farkle’s birthday.”
“I know.  And I know she’ll be there and try to not let it affect her, but Maya, we still don’t know the whole story.  We don’t know who broke up with who.”
“There are going to be a ton of people there,” she reasoned.  “Maybe they won’t even cross paths?  Maybe she’s doing better than we think she is?  Maybe…maybe she is over it?”  She looked down at the counter as she quickly debated on which eye shadow to use.  “She has been dating around…and has gone on like four dates with this new guy.”
Josh frowned.  “Really?  Who is he?”
She frowned.  Nothing she had was going to work with her dress.  “Uhhh…Caleb, I think?  I only met him once.”
“Is he coming tonight?”
She sighed.  The good thing about living with her best friend was that she was welcome to borrow her things—including her makeup.  “I think so.  He’s friends with Farkle too.  That’s how she met him.”
“Then maybe we only need to worry about Lucas?”
Maya scoffed.  “You can worry about Lucas.”
“Come on, Maya.  I know you still talk to him.”
“Maybe I do, but when it comes to break ups, us girls have to stick together.”
Riley took a deep breath as she examined her appearance.  Was she actually going to do this?  Was she going to willingly go somewhere she knew he would be?  There were only two reasons that kept her from changing into her sweatpants and spending some much needed time with her Netflix: the first was because it was one of her best friends’ 21st birthdays and the second was because she had a date.  That should be enough of a buffer, right?  Surely, they won’t end up in a tangled heap on her bed, like every other time she’s seen him since he left for Texas two years ago?
Would that be so bad though?  She had only ever been intimate with one person in her life, and that one person knew exactly where to touch her to send her to the peak of pleasure.  He knew the deal just as well as she did.  They agreed that it was only physical—that the feelings they once shared no longer existed.
Two years, and Riley Matthews lived happily in the land of denial.  
But what about Caleb—her actual date for the evening?  He was supposed to be her distraction, her way of forcing herself to move on from the toxic non-relationship relationship she found herself in with her ex-boyfriend.  He was a nice guy.  They got along great and had a lot in common.  There was only one problem—he wasn’t Lucas.
“Stop it,” she growled at herself before she brushed her hair out of her eyes.  No, Caleb wasn’t Lucas, but that didn’t mean that there couldn’t be something between them.  It wasn’t fair to compare eight years of history to four dates, but she had very little else to compare it to.  She never made it past the second date before, and with this guy, she had already doubled that landmark.  She needed to see where this could go.  She needed to end this cycle with Lucas.
She needed to move on.
//See me up in the club with fifty-eleven girls Posted in the back, diamond fangs in my grill Brooklyn brim with my eyes sitting low Every boy in here with me got that smoke//
The lights were dimmed, the drinks flowed, and everyone was dressed to the nine’s.  As soon as Riley stepped foot into the ballroom, she felt like she had walked straight into a Fitzgerald novel.  His parents spared no expense to celebrate the first 21 years of their brilliant son’s life.  There was a jazz band at the front of the room, an open bar along the back wall, and a massive dance floor in the middle of it all.
“Riley,” she heard the man of the hour call out to her.
She spun around as a warm smile graced her features.  “Well, if it isn’t the birthday boy.”  She opened her arms as she hugged one of her best friends in the world.  “Happy Birthday, Farkle.”
“Thank you,” he smiled as he pulled back from her.  “Where’s Maya?”
“She went to pick up Josh.  You know her…fashionably late and always wanting to make an entrance.”
“So, they’re finally going public, huh?”
Riley nodded.  “The real question is when did they actually start dating?”
“What do you mean?”
“Come on, Farkle.  She hasn’t dated anyone in the last two years.  You can’t tell me they weren’t sneaking around.”
He wrinkled his nose.  “You really think she’d do that?”
Riley glanced around the room.  “Yeah.  I mean…if she thought people would disapprove or condemn her for it…why wouldn’t she keep it a secret?”
He shook his head.  “I can’t imagine doing anything like that.  If I was with someone I cared about…someone I loved…I’d proclaim it from the balcony of this place.”
Riley gave him a half smile.  ‘Of course you would,’ she lamented.  “Where is Smackle?”
He turned around as he surveyed the ballroom.  “Somewhere in the crowd,” he chuckled.  “I want to thank you for coming tonight.”
She knit her eyebrows together.  Why would he thank her for attending his party?  “Thank me?  It’s your birthday.”
He nodded.  “I know, but I also know that you haven’t seen…you know…since he left for Texas.”
She slowly nodded before she released a deep breath.  “Yeah.  Well…that’s what the open bar is for, right?”
He frowned.  “But you aren’t—“
She pinned him with a look.  Was he really going to stop her from grabbing a few drinks?  True, she still had about eight months to go until her own 21st, but this was a party.  She was determined to celebrate with her friends.  “Speaking of…is he…here yet?”  While she tried to sound as nonchalant as she could, it felt like her heart had done a back flip.
Farkle glanced around the ballroom once more.  “I’m not sure.  I haven’t seen him.”  He paused.  “I thought Caleb was bringing you?”
“We thought it would be easier if we met up here.  Kind of take some of the pressure off.”
Farkle nodded.  “He’s a good guy, Riley.”
“I know,” she smiled.
Farkle watched her for a moment as her eyes lowered to the ground.  He had no idea what happened between Riley and Lucas in Europe two years earlier, but whatever happened must have been really awful.  Neither of them ever talked about it, and they always seemed to shut down at the mere mention of the other.   To his knowledge, neither of them had yet to engage in another romantic relationship.  “You don’t have to force it you know.”  When her head snapped up, he gave her a small smile.  “We just want you to be happy.”
“Thank you,” she said softly.
“The bar is open…no ID required, but if you do drink, please use the chauffeur service my parents set up in the lobby.  Limousines for all my guests to get home safely.”
Riley’s eyes widened.  “Limos?”
He nodded.  “It’s not every day that their only child turns 21.”
She laughed lightly.  “In that case, how about we share a celebratory drink in your honor?”
//Every girl in here got to look me up and down All on Instagram, cake by the pound Circulate the image every time I come around G's up, tell me how I'm looking babe//
One drink turned into two, then three.  She felt numb.   She felt nothing.  It was exactly where she wanted to be if she was forced to come face to face with him in front of a crowd of people.  She had been there for nearly an hour and a half by the time she finished her fourth drink.  Caleb had showed up around drink number three, and whenever they weren’t around the bar with Josh and Maya, they were on the dance floor.
To everyone else, she looked like a woman who didn’t have a care in the world.  Despite the numbness, the anxiety she felt in the pit of her stomach grew more and more as the minutes droned on.  At any moment, he would walk in.  At any moment, she would become completely undone.  In front of all her friends, she knew she would have a complete meltdown.  She wasn’t over him.  She had convinced herself that she was—she had to in order to survive.  She broke up with him.  She refused him.  She had no right to still love him.  She had no right to still dream about him.  And she definitely didn’t have a right to want him to be next to her every single second for the rest of her life.
God, she was a terrible person.  In front of her was a perfectly nice guy.  Caleb was everything she could ever want, but all she could think about was the missing Texan.
As Caleb twirled her around on the dance floor, something in the doorway caught her eye.  Her head lifted just as he walked in.  Her heart raced as his eyes immediately locked onto hers.  
He came.
For the first time since their breakup, they were in the same place and completely surrounded by their curious friends.
Suddenly, she couldn’t breathe.  She couldn’t think.  She couldn’t stomach the idea of seeing him like this.  She wasn’t ready.  It was hard enough to keep her secret from her friends when he wasn’t in town.  There was no way she could spend the next few hours with him in the same room and pretend that they weren’t what they were—friends with benefits without the friend part.
She suddenly stood rigid as she felt the color drain from her face.  “I-I-‘m sorry,” she apologized to her date.  “I think I had too much.  I need…I need to go home…lay down.”
“That’s ok,” Caleb assured her.  “I’ll go with you…make sure you get home safely.”
“No,” she gave him a small smile.  He was such a nice guy—far nicer than she ever deserved.  “That’s ok, Caleb.  Farkle has this car service for everyone.  I’m just…going to use that and go home.  Stay.  Have fun.”  She looked around the ballroom.  “It’s a great party.”  
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah,” she nodded.  “Absolutely.  I’m just need to go lay down.  I’m not…I’m not going to be good company.  Besides…I need someone to tell me everything that happens.”
He smiled.  “You got it.”
//Boy this all for you just walk my way Just tell me how it's looking babe Just tell me how it's looking babe (How it's looking babe)//
She escaped the ballroom through the only other exit as quickly as her legs could carry her.  She had to go home.  She had to leave and avoid him completely.  She was weak.  She knew it.  One look from him and she was about to fall apart.  They had carried on this ridiculous non-relationship relationship for a while now.  They didn’t speak when he was in Texas, but whenever he was in the city, their paths always crossed, and when they did, she couldn’t resist him.  She never could, except for Paris.
Why couldn’t she be that strong now?  Why couldn’t she look him in the eye and tell him that what they were doing was wrong and that it was only going to cause a greater rift between them in the end?  She wanted him in her life, but as they were now, he was only in her life when he was in her bed—or his bed at his parents’ place—or her couch—or the kitchen counter at her parents’ apartment—or a few other places.
She shook her head as she chased the thought of them tangled up together out of her mind.  She had to be strong, or as strong as she could be at the moment.  That meant fleeing.  That meant bailing on one of her best friends’ birthdays.  There were easily 200 people in that ballroom, but in that split second when her eyes landed on his, only two people existed.
It was too intense, especially considering the fact that she was insanely inebriated.  Little Riley Matthews, who rarely did anything wrong, was drunk and running away from her ex-boyfriend/current affair.  If only her thirteen year old self could see her now.
She sprinted through the lobby as she made her way outside.  She had forgotten her jacket, but there was no way she would dare go back inside.  She spotted a valet outside and quickly told him that she was at the Minkus party but needed a ride home.
Her fingers tapped against her clutch as she waited for her ride.  It felt like an eternity had passed by the time a limousine pulled up in front of her.  She smiled at the elderly driver as he stepped out of the limo to open the door for her.  “Thank you,” she said as she walked toward the door.
“Riley,” a voice called out from behind her.
She froze as she gripped the door.  She closed her eyes as she quickly assessed her options.  She could climb in the limo, pretend that she hadn’t heard him, go home, and sleep…or…she could face him and get this over with.  She took a deep breath as she turned around to face him.  God, even under the bright lights of the city she loved, he looked positively god-like.  She was never able to resist him, but there was something about Lucas Friar in a suit that always drove her crazy.  She swallowed as her eyes slowly took in his appearance.
“Miss,” the limo driver questioned as he waited to close the door behind his passenger.
Riley smiled at the driver as she gave him the address to the apartment she shared with Maya.  “I can get the door,” she kindly told him.  She waited until he slid into the driver’s seat and shut the door before she dared to look at Lucas once more.
“Where are you going?”  It was a pathetic question, he knew it, but he wasn’t sure what else to say.  She was the first person he saw as he entered the ballroom.  She looked like a vision in red, but unfortunately for him, she was twirling around on the dance floor with someone who wasn’t him. ‘Because you aren’t together,’ he bitterly reminded himself as he engaged in what felt like an hour-long staring match with the girl he had once been able to call his own.
When she left the ballroom, he followed her.  Farkle was one of his best friends, but Riley was—everything.  One of the biggest reasons he decided to fly in for the night was on the off chance that he would be able to see her, maybe even talk to her.  Their current relationship status, or lack thereof, was driving him to the brink of madness.  He wanted her—not just her body—but all of her.  He wanted to be hers and he wanted her to be his again.  His world hadn’t felt like his world since that ill-fated trip to Europe.  All he wanted was to wake up from this nightmare and move forward with the girl who had captured his heart nearly a decade ago.
“Home,” she said simply as her heart pounded.  She smacked her palm against the door as she bit her bottom lip.  She knew she shouldn’t.  She knew that nothing good was going to come from it, but there was something about him that she had never been able to resist. She wanted to blame the alcohol for her weakness, but even in her bewildered state, she knew it wasn’t that.  It was him.  He was her weakness.
She finally pushed the door open.  “Coming?”  
//I do this all for you baby just take aim And tell me how it's looking babe (How it's looking babe) Tell me how it's looking babe, looking babe//
She briefly closed her eyes when she heard the door shut.  She was going to hell.  She knew it.  This was insane.  She left the party to avoid him, and now, he was going to go back to her apartment with her?  She swallowed before she opened her eyes.  As the limo pulled away from the curb, she looked around the spacious car.  “Pretty nice, huh,” she commented.
“Yeah,” he released a breath.  “Farkle’s parents set this up too?”
She nodded.  “That way everyone can get home safely.”
He looked at her.  “Why did you leave so early?”
She glanced out the window.  “I wasn’t feeling well.”  Her eyes fell to her lap.
“You seemed to be doing fine when I saw you…dancing around with…”
“Caleb.”  She slowly turned to him.  “That was Caleb.”
Lucas’s lips formed a thin line as he debated his next question.  He had to ask.  He had to know.  “Boyfriend?”
Riley shook her head.  “We’ve been out a few times.  Nothing…serious.”
“Do you want there to be anything serious?”
She shrugged.  “I don’t know.  He’s nice.  He’s friends with Farkle.  He’s…everything a girl could want.”
Lucas nodded.  “Looks like it.”  He paused.  “So, if he’s Mr. Perfect, then why isn’t he in here with you?”
Riley knew that this was wrong.  She knew that she should give Lucas some stupid reason and use Caleb as an excuse to end things, but she couldn’t.  She felt like a moth drown to the flame, and it had been four months since she last saw him at Christmas.  Four months since the last time he was in her bed.
Four months too long.
She didn’t answer him as she slowly raked her eyes over his body.  She allowed the alcohol to overtake her, to quiet the annoying voice in her head that screamed at her that this wasn’t right.  She didn’t want to think.  She could think tomorrow.  Right now, tonight, she wanted to feel.  She wanted to feel something that she had only ever felt with him.
Riley slowly lifted her hand before she placed it on his thigh.  She knew what she was inviting in.  She knew that Pandora’s box had suddenly flown open, but she didn’t care.  Lucas Friar was sitting next to her, and all she wanted was to feel him inside of her.
He was jealous.  Knowing that the guy who spun her around on the dance floor was also someone she had gone on multiple dates with made him more than a little hot under the collar.  He knew he had no say in who she dated, but God, did he want one.  He wanted to keep her.  He wanted her.
As soon as her fingers grazed his thigh, he became undone.  The woman next to him completely possessed all of his senses.  He knew that this wouldn’t end well, but what he wouldn’t give for one more taste of heaven—of the goddess who haunted every dream he had since the day they met.  “How long…until we reach your place?”
She blinked. “It took me half an hour to get here.  Considering the traffic…maybe forty five minutes?”
He slowly inched closer to her before he ran his index finger along her cheek.  “Say it,” his suddenly hoarse voice pleaded with her as his hand cupped the side of her face.  “Tell me you want me.”
She watched his eyes darken as he commanded her to tell him the truth.  “I want you,” she found herself answering as she closed the remaining space between them.
He moved his hand to the back of her neck before his lips met hers in a searing kiss.
//Drop the bass, mane, the bass get lower Radio say "speed it up", I just go slower High like treble, pumping on the mids Ya man ain't ever seen a booty like this//
As soon as she felt his lips on hers, everything else melted away.  It was part of the reason why she felt so intoxicated by him.  With every touch, every kiss, every lustful whisper, they were transported to a place where time, space, and everything else that kept them apart didn’t exist.  They simple were.  They merely existed to show one another just how perfectly well they fit together.
Riley opened her mouth against his as she eagerly invited his tongue to re-familiarize itself with hers.  Her hands gripped his forearms as he cupped her face in his hands.  She knew this wasn’t right.  She knew that they were in a limo and that they could get caught doing whatever it was they were about to do, but she didn’t care.  She had been forced to be away from his touch for the last several months.  She didn’t want to sit in awkward silence for the next forty-five minutes while she could be re-familiarizing herself with every square inch of his muscular body.
She quickly slid his jacket down his arms.  Lucas broke away from her lips long enough to toss it to the other side of the limousine.  This wasn’t them—at least not completely.  Three years ago, he never thought they would be well on their way to fulfilling a stereotype about limousines, but three years ago, he never imagined that they wouldn’t be together.  She had changed a lot in the last two years.  She was more serious now.  They didn’t talk about much when they were together.  Somehow, they both thought it would be easier.  For him, it certainly was.  He knew that, given the opportunity, he would beg her to take him back, to forget about that trip after graduation.  
After she slid his tie off, he quickly unbuttoned his shirt.  He was grateful for the fact that he thought to take her ring—the engagement ring that he wore around his neck—off before he left his parents’ house.  If she ever saw it, if she knew that he wore it like a chain around his neck for all to see his ultimate failure, she would never speak to him again.  He couldn’t help but wear it though.  In some demented, self-deprecating way, it made him feel closer to her while he lived two thousand miles away.
As he slid the white shirt down his arms, he watched her scoot closer to him before she quickly pulled his undershirt off.  She then lowered her head in order to plant kisses across his bare chest.  He closed his eyes as he leaned his head back.  What he wouldn’t give to know that this was real.  He knew he had to put it out of his mind.  He knew that he had to forget, for a little while, that the heavenly creature beside him not only possessed his heart, but his mind, body, and soul as well.
His mind nearly exploded when she slowly sank to the ground in front of him.
//And why you think ya keep my name rolling off the tongue Cuz when he wanna smash I'll just write another one I sneezed on the beat and the beat got sicker Yoncé all on his mouth like liquor//
She had to forget that he still had the capacity to rip her heart to shreds.  She had to forget that she left Farkle’s party to avoid this exact situation.  She wanted the alcohol to wipe away every shred of feeling she had for the man who sat in front of her.  It would be easier that way.
She bit her bottom lip as she pushed every angst-filled thought away.  She could chastise herself for being weak later.  Right now, he was half naked in front of her.  He really was built like a Greek god.  Had he been working out?  The muscles in his chest seemed more defined than the last time she saw him.  She was beginning to think of him like a fine wine—only getting better with age.
It was the opposite of what she had hoped for.  She hoped that they would outgrow whatever this was.  She hoped that one day she would wake up and not love him.  It had been almost two years since she broke up with him, but here she was—kneeling in front of him—completely in awe of every square inch of him.
She scooted closer as her hands reached for his belt.
As she reached her arms out, he did as well.  He didn’t want her to kneel in front of him—at least, not yet.  He wanted to be inside of her.  He wanted to send them both to the peak of ecstasy.  He wanted to taste her.  He wanted to become completely lost inside of her.  He wanted to hear that melodic moan—the one that had haunted him since their last encounter.
Riley pulled back from him as he reached for her.  “No,” she commanded.
He raised an eyebrow at her.  “No?”
She shook her head.  “You climbed into my limo, remember?  Pretty sure that means I get to make the rules.”
“Riley,” he groaned,  “You don’t have to—“
Her eyes darkened.  “I want to.”
“Well, I want to be inside you.  I want to taste you.”
//Yoncé all on his mouth like liquor//
She placed her hands behind her as she leaned back on the floor of the limousine.  Her head slowly rolled to the side as she stared at him.  “How about this,” she slowly drawled out as the four drinks she pounded earlier began to take effect.  The old Riley Matthews would never discuss sex as freely and as plainly as she was about to, but she wasn’t the old Riley.  She hadn’t been the old Riley since she got back from Europe two years ago.
He watched as she slowly stretched back.  The act may have seemed innocent enough at the time, but while her body moved back, her dress remained stagnant.  He licked his lips as he was graced with the sight of her cleavage.  How was this fair?  He was only half dressed while she hadn’t so much as taken her shoes off.  “I’m listening,” he finally murmured.
//Yoncé all on his mouth like liquor//
“I get what I want on the way to my place…and when we get there…you get what you want.”  Her eyes slowly lowered from his own eyes, down his chest and finally toward his crotch.  She slowly rolled her head to the other side as lifted her eyes back up to his.  She was completely inexperienced when it came to the art of seduction, but those drinks at least gave her the illusion that she was doing something right.
“Or,” he countered as he slowly leaned forward, “I get what I want now…take you to a place you’ve never been before…and when we get to your apartment,” his eyes slowly roamed down her body, “you beg me to do it all over again.”
//Yoncé all on his mouth like liquor Like like liquor, like like like liquor//
Riley slowly inhaled as she watched him inch closer and closer to her.  His eyes had locked onto hers, and she couldn’t make herself look away.  She took several shallow breaths as he slowly sank to the floor and straddled her.  As he slowly leaned forward, her breath completely caught in her throat.
He placed his hands on either side of her as his lips inched toward hers.  He was tired of the space in between them.  He had to deal with it 99% of the time.  He was going to be damned if he would allow it while they were alone together.  
He lowered his eyes to her lips as his face drew closer to hers.  “Do we have a deal,” he rumbled before his lips lightly brushed against hers.
//Yoncé all on his mouth like liquor//
She closed her eyes at the contact.  God, he was much better at the whole seduction thing than she was.  As he slowly nibbled on her bottom lip, she felt herself beginning to cave in.  Did it really matter who was in control?  All she wanted to do was lose herself in him.  All she wanted was to pretend that her entire life wasn’t completely screwed up.
Lucas couldn’t stop the smile that formed when he heard a soft moan escape her as he lightly ran his tongue across her bottom lip.  She tasted like vodka, and he hated it.  He hated that she had been drinking.  He wasn’t going to ask how much.  He knew if he did, that it would all be over.  As much as he wanted her, he wasn’t in it strictly for the sex.  He was in it to keep some kind of connection with her.  He hoped that one of these rendezvouses would result in their reconciliation.  He hoped that, maybe one day, he would be able to possess her heart just as she had always possessed his.
For now, he had to accept their relationship for what it was—and that meant ignoring the vodka on her lips.
//Yoncé all on his mouth like liquor//
A shiver shot down her spine as his tongue slowly tasted her lips.  Could he taste the alcohol she had drank?  Did he know how drunk she was?  Did he care?
No.  She wasn’t about to allow her train of thought to stray from the intensity of the moment they were engaged in.  Her temporary restoration to reality made her realize that she wanted to be in control—at least for a while.  She wanted the power to administer, or withhold, pleasure from him.  She wanted to dominate him—just as he dominated most of her thoughts.
She nudged him back as she turned her head to the side.  When he sat back on his heels, she turned to him once more.  “No deal,” she purred.  “You can either sit back up in that seat and experience the best,” her eyes lowered to his crotch for a beat before she looked back up at him, “Or we can sit on opposite sides of this limousine until I get home, and then you can go back to the party.”
He took a deep breath.  “That’s not fair.”
She smirked.  “You won’t think that if you agree to the terms…trust me.”
//Yoncé all on his mouth like liquor Like like liquor, like like like liquor//
She sat up as she crossed her arms over her chest.  “Well,” she asked softly before she touched her lips with her index finger.  “Do we have a deal?”
He had no other choice.  He’d be her willing slave if she asked him to.  “You get a say now, and I get a say later?”
She nodded.  “And don’t worry…I’ve got the place to myself for the entire night.”
He raised his eyebrows.  “Really?”
She nodded.  “So, what’s it going to be, Friar?”
//Driver, roll up the partition, please Driver, roll up the partition, please I don't need you seeing 'Yoncé on her knees//
“You’re so going to pay for that,” he told her as he slowly rose and sat back in the seat.
Riley smirked as she leaned forward and began to unbuckle his pants.  “Promises, promises.”  She unzipped his pants and slid them down while Lucas kicked his shoes off.  Riley took his pants off and tossed them in the direction of the rest of his discarded clothing.  She tilted her head to the side as she briefly admired the sight of him clad only in a pair of black boxers.  ‘He could totally be an underwear model,’ she mused as she hooked her fingers underneath the band of the last remaining garment he wore.  Slowly, almost painfully so, she slid his underwear down.  She sat it next to her before she slid in between his legs.
She knew that they didn’t have long before they reached her apartment.  She knew that he ended up with the better deal, but about six months ago, she had a dream about Lucas Friar that she hadn’t quite been able to rid herself of—and it started out a lot like this.
She slowly looked up into his curious eyes.  As she lowered her head, she maintained eye contact with him.  She wanted to see his pleasure.  She wanted to know that she had some control over him—at least for a little while.
She placed her left hand on his thigh while her right hand hovered over his penis.  She slowly ran her index finger down the length of his shaft.  When he jumped at the contact, she knew that she had the potential to affect him just as deeply as he affected her.  She smiled as she watched him slowly relax as she ran her fingers over him once more.  
While his body may have relaxed against her touch, his mind nearly exploded.  What was she thinking?  What did she want to do so badly that she had to resort to threats to get him to acquiesce to her desire to take charge?  All he wanted was to reach for her, pull her close, and bury himself inside of her.  Screw the outside world.  Screw the last two years.  Screw everything that made her keep him at arm’s length.  What if he moved back home?  Would that solve everything or would that only push her further away?
He closed his eyes and hissed as her hand wrapped around his aching erection.  She was teasing him.  She had to know that she was driving him insane.  God, it was taking everything in him not to reach for her, to beg her to return to him.
//Took 45 minutes to get all dressed up We ain't even gonna make it to this club//
When he closed his eyes, Riley felt a warmness spread through her.  He was enjoying this, and she had barely started.  A surge of confidence shot through her as she lowered her lips to his throbbing member.  Her tongue darted out as she stared at the man before her.
Lucas moaned as soon as he felt her tongue slide over him.  This wasn’t the first time she had ever gone down on him, but he had forgotten just how intoxicating the sensation was.  He felt completely paralyzed as she wrapped her lips around the head of his penis.  He took a deep breath as she slowly slid his length between the heavenly gates of her lips.
With every inch she took in, she could feel the control she had over him.  It was empowering to know that she could do whatever she wanted to him in that moment and would comply.  While she was the one who rejected him, the one who ended it, she often felt like she was the one who was held captive in their new ‘relationship’.  She couldn’t explain the feeling, except for the conclusion she had reached, and then tried to bury, nearly nine months earlier—that she was still in love with him.
//Now my mascara running, red lipstick smudged Oh he so horny, yeah he want to fuck He popped all my buttons, and he ripped my blouse He Monica Lewinsky-ed all on my gown//
She clenched her fists as she finally took him completely in her mouth.  She wasn’t going to get emotional with him.  Not now.  She could lament the absurdity of her life once he left the city.  For now, she only wanted to give, and receive, pleasure from the only person she had ever experienced it from.  She focused on the task at hand as she began to bob her head up and down.  She wanted to fully give into whatever they had become.  She didn’t want to think about the consequences.  She only wanted to feel.  She wanted him to beg for her.  She wanted him to need her just as much as she needed him.  Everything else would either fade or work itself out over time.
Lucas gripped the seat as he leaned his head back.  He had to keep his mind focused on the most revolting things to keep himself from exploding as she continued to lick and suck him.  He thought about cold showers, the starting lineup of the Yankees, even the ill-fated trip to Europe—all to no avail.  She had been moving against him for only a few minutes, but he was almost at that pivotal point.
She must have sensed it because right at the point of release, she detached her lips from his shaft.  “You ok,” she panted as she watched him slowly lower his head to look at her.
“Y-Yeah,” he stammered before he cleared his throat.  “More than ok.  You?”
“Not as good as you,” she said softly as she slowly stood up.  She placed her legs on either side of him as she straddled him.  “But,” she whispered as she lowered her head to his neck, “I’m pretty sure I can get there…with your help.”
Lucas swallowed as her lips connected with the base of his neck.  His hands moved to her back as he desperately sought contact with her skin.  He was still willing to let her control what would or would not happen in the limo, because he knew as soon as they entered her apartment, it would be his turn to dictate who received what and when.
“That feels good,” she purred in his ear.  “I love it when you touch me.”  She leaned back.  “Even if it’s somewhere completely innocent…like my back or my arms.”
He swallowed as his eyes met hers.  Was he losing his mind or did he see a flash of something more in her lust-filled gaze?  What did she mean?  Did she miss him as much as he missed her?  Did she miss them?  Did she want something more than what they had been reduced to?  “Well,” he began as his lowered his hand to the hem of her dress.  “I am more than willing to touch you wherever you want me to.”
Riley lowered her gaze as she watched him slowly slide her dress up as his hands glided up her thighs.  Her heart raced as his fingers grazed the outside of her underwear.  “And you can,” her voice quivered slightly as she looked back at him, “when it’s your turn.”
“Aw, come on, Riles,” he smirked, “You know you want me inside you just as badly as I want to be inside you.”
She bit her bottom lip.  “Mmm…I feel how badly you want to be inside of me.”
His hand slowly slid over in between her legs.  He gave her a wolfish grin as soon as he felt the moisture between her thighs.  “So do I,” he practically snarled as he ran his thumb over the outside of the thin material.
“Ravish me,” she commanded as she buried her head in the side of his neck.  “Show me, Lucas.  I want to know how badly you want me.”
He needed no other invitation.  He quickly gripped the band of her underwear and with one pull, the lacy material ripped.  He quickly discarded it before he slid her closer to him.  In one fluid motion, he filled her.
//Oh there daddy, daddy didn’t bring the towel Oh baby baby we betta slow it down Took 45 minutes to get all dressed up We ain't even gonna make it to this club//
They remained still for a few moments as the simply took in the moment.  They were finally one—they were finally connected again.  They both felt like they could finally breathe for the first time in months.  They both felt like the chaotic world that surrounded them finally made sense.  It felt like coming home.
He gripped her hips as she slowly began to rock back and forth.  He was content enough to let her control their pace—for the moment.  He knew she wanted to control the ride, so he was determined to allow her to do that, despite her pleas for him to take over.  He knew he had time to do that—once they got into her apartment.
Her hand slid across his shoulders and down his arms as she began to regain control of her senses.  This felt good—too good—better than the dream she couldn’t seem to let go of.
He wanted to touch her.  He wanted to see every square inch of her magnificent body, but he knew that they had to be getting close to her place, and again, he wanted her to dictate what he could and couldn’t see.  If she wanted to remain fully (well, almost) clothed during their first interlude, then that was completely up to her.  He could guarantee that she wouldn’t have a stitch of clothing on her during their second, and hopefully, third exchange.
//Take all of me I just wanna be the girl you like, girl you like The kind of girl you like, girl you like//
Riley’s movements began to quicken as she threw her head back.  Lucas wrapped his arms around her as he began to plant kisses along her neck and chest.  This felt nothing short of heaven, and he was hell bent to send her to the same euphoric paradise when they reached their destination.
He nearly snapped at her when she pushed his head back.  Before he had a chance to voice his displeasure, she quickly covered his lips with her own.  He pulled her even closer as he sought to control her mouth.  
Riley couldn’t get close enough to him as she neared her climax.  Her legs were wrapped around him as their tongues engaged in another battle of a long fought war between them.  This was everything she had dreamt of and so much more.  “Lucas,” she gasped as she pulled back.  She couldn’t breathe.  She could barely get his name out.  She moaned as she quickened her pace.
Lucas dropped his hands to her ass as he slid her to him.  If he wasn’t already approaching his own climax, he would have after he heard her gasp his name.  He never loved his name more than when he heard her say it in complete, unadulterated pleasure.  He groaned as she slammed against him.  Just a few more thrusts and he would be sent spiraling into a different plane of reality.
“Oh,” she moaned once more as her head snapped back.  She was there.  She was there.  She just needed him to join her.  She needed to feel him convulse within her.
The sight of her nearing the brink of her climax sent him tumbling over. He gripped her back as he moaned her name.  She fisted his hair as she finally gave in and careened over the edge with him.  
It was wrong.  She knew it, and he did too, but at that moment, nothing ever felt more right.
//Take all of me I just wanna be the girl you like, girl you like The kinda girl you like Is right here with me//
She tried to straighten up her appearance as much as she could while Lucas put his clothes back on.  Her hair was a mess, and her dress was slightly wrinkled, but she didn’t care about that.  She just hoped that the driver didn’t hear them.  She had never done anything like that in her life, but as she glanced at Lucas who seemed to be preoccupied with putting his shirt back on, she had zero regrets about it.  At the end of the day, she trusted the guy she sat next to, even if they weren’t together.  He had been her first everything, and was still her only sexual partner.  She trusted him more than anyone—even herself at times.  It was one reason why she refused to engage in deep discussions with him.  She knew she would buckle.  She knew she would confess everything to him, but she couldn’t.  He was still in Texas.  She was still in New York.  She couldn’t hold him back.  If he met someone, she didn’t want him to worry about breaking her heart (even though when the day finally came, Riley knew she would be completely inconsolable).
She shook her head.  Were they there yet?  She needed something to drink.  She was beginning to sober up and her brain was racing to catch up to her heart.  She couldn’t allow that.  She didn’t want to back out.  She didn’t want to walk away from him.  She wasn’t strong enough for that—not yet anyway.  Couldn’t they hold on for a little while longer?”
As Lucas slid his jacket on, he spotted Riley’s torn underwear on the ground.  He glanced at the brunette who stared out the darkened window.  He leaned forward as he reached for the garment.  He slid it into his pocket before he leaned back in his seat.  He slid his tie into the other pocket as the limo finally halted.
Riley turned her head when she heard the driver open his door.  She smiled sheepishly at Lucas.  “Perfect timing.”
He let out a soft chuckle.  “Yeah.”
When the driver opened the door on Lucas’s side, the Texan slid out of the limo.  Riley quickly scanned the backseat, but couldn’t find her underwear anywhere.  ‘Oh God,’ she thought as she reached for her clutch.  ‘Please don’t let this sweet man find them.’  She slid out of the car and thanked the driver for giving her a ride home.
The driver nodded and wished her a good night.
As he walked away, Riley glanced at Lucas.  Well, she was already going to hell for doing this, might as well enjoy another glimpse of heaven while she was at it.
She opened her bag as she searched for her keys.
“When did you move out of the dorm,” he asked as they walked toward the door.
“Umm…after last semester.  We…we were trying to stay at least through sophomore year, but it got to be too loud over there.  And besides,” she added as she stuck the key in the door, “Maya started dating Josh, so she was more than ready to leave the juvenile setting of a dorm room.”  She opened the door.
“So, they finally went public,” Lucas noted as they walked up the stairs toward Riley’s apartment.
“Yeah,” she sighed.  “Zay and I have a running bet on to when they actually first started dating.”  She looked back at the Texan.  “Pretty sure it was while we were in high school.”
“Oh definitely,” he agreed as he followed her on the stairs.  “She was always sneaking off…didn’t date anyone.  She went to prom by herself.”
“She didn’t go by herself,” Riley insisted as they reached the third floor.  “We all went together, remember?”
Lucas looked down as he followed her down the hallway.  Oh.  He remembered that night clearly.  It was the night he knew he was going to propose to her.  The three of them went to the prom together because Riley didn’t want Maya to go alone.  Lucas danced with both of them and the girls danced with one another.  It reminded him a lot of the triangle that wasn’t in middle school.  As he watched them dance with one another, he realized that they all had come so far from those days.  He couldn’t imagine being with anyone else.  He couldn’t imagine ever loving anyone the way he loved her.  He knew it was crazy.  They were young and both of them had committed themselves to going to schools on opposite sides of the country, but as he watched her turn to look at him and smiled while she danced with her best friend, he knew that there would never be anyone else for him.
“Lucas,” she called out to him.
His head snapped up at the sound of his name.
“Are you going to come in or stay in the hallway all night,” she chuckled.
He gave her a small smile as he followed her into her apartment.
//Driver, roll up the partition fast Driver, roll up the partition fast Over there I swear I saw them cameras flash//
Riley sat her clutch on the counter as she ducked into of the small kitchenette.  She needed alcohol to quiet the voice in her head that screamed at her that this wasn’t right.  “Do you want anything,” she called out as she opened the fridge.
“What do you have,” he called back as he slowly wandered into her small living room.  Pictures of their group aligned the walls of the small apartment.  Some of Maya’s artwork was peppered in between.  A soft smile formed on his lips as he recalled every memory of every photo that laid before him.
“Beer, wine, tequila, vodka…”
“Beer is good,” he responded as he shrugged out of his jacket.  He needed to take the edge off.  He hadn’t had a drop to drink, but if he was expected to keep up the charade of pretending that what they were doing was strictly physical, then he needed something to dull his senses.  He had nearly declared his undying love for her in the limo, and that was during a rushed exchange.  God knows what would come out of his mouth given a few more hours with her.  
For what he had envisioned for the remainder of the evening, he knew that he had to be at least slightly inebriated.
He wasn’t about to destroy the last shred of her he could have.
She heard him loud and clear: beer.  He wanted beer.  Meanwhile, she went straight for the vodka.  It had allowed her to pull through the first time.  Surely, it wouldn’t give up on her now.  “How about a shot of vodka too,” she called out as she poured one for herself.
“Sure,” he answered as he strolled into the kitchen.  He leaned against the doorway as he watched her pour him a shot.
“Do you need something to chase it with,” she asked as she opened the refrigerator.
“No,” he answered.
Riley smiled at him.  “Impressive Dr. Friar.  Learn that in Texas?”
He smirked.  “Well, in Texas, we go for whiskey.”
“Sorry,” she shrugged as she closed the refrigerator.  She grabbed both shots before she walked over to him.  She handed him the glass.  “Fresh out.”
He tapped his glass to hers.  “To…old friends.”
She looked down.  “Yeah.  Old friends.”
They both leaned back at the same time as they downed the liquid.  Neither of them reacted as it burned down their throats.  Both had become used to the taste of it.  Both of them were used to using it as a means of escaping their feelings, the reality that had taken shape of their world.
“Do you want another one,” she asked as she took the glass from him.
“One more,” he answered.  “Then I could really go for that beer.”
She smiled as she poured them another shot.  “I didn’t forget.”  She sat the bottle down.  “You know,” she began as she walked back to him, “Beer is pretty fattening.”
He looked down.  “Are you saying I’ve gotten fat,” he teased.
She handed him the small glass.  Neither said a word as they both drank the contents.  “No,” she answered as she took the glass from him.  “Quite the opposite actually.  I need to know your secret to staying fit while pounding beers.”
“I don’t drink beer that often,” he answered truthfully.
“Just on special occasions,” she offered.
He chuckled.  “Yeah…or when there isn’t an ample supply of whiskey around.”
“Ah.”  She opened the refrigerator one last time as she pulled out a beer for him.  She popped the cap off before she walked back to him and handed him the bottle.  “Well, now I know.”
“For next time?”  He took a swig as he watched her walk into the living room.
“Are you coming back this summer?”
“Yeah,” he sighed as he followed her.
“You don’t sound very happy about it.”
“I’ll only be in town for a few weeks.”
Riley slowly sat down on the couch.  “Oh.”
“Yeah,” he sat down next to her.  “Pappy Joe needs some help this summer.  I told him I’d help him.  He doesn’t really have…anyone else there to take care of everything.”
Riley folded her hands. “Well, that’s nice of you.”  Her gaze fell as she looked at her joined hands.  So, he wouldn’t be in town this summer.  Maybe it was for the best.  Maybe this was the push she needed to finally detach herself from him.  Her eyes drifted back toward her kitchen.  Would it be too much for her to finish off that bottle of vodka?
“Unless there’s a reason for me to stay.”  He took another swig of his beer.  Had he actually said that?  He waited for the fallout.  He waited for her to get upset, to kick him out.  Instead, he heard her chuckle.
“Family is family.  I don’t think there could be a better reason for you to spend the summer there.”
“Yeah,” he nodded.  He glanced around the room once more.  “This is a nice apartment.”
“Yeah,” she sighed as she looked around.  “We like it.  Nice neighbors.  It’s nice to feel independent, you know?”
“Definitely understandable.”  He looked at the bottle in his hands.
They fell silent for a few moments as Lucas took occasional sips of his drink.  Finally, Riley’s ringtone chimed through the otherwise soundless apartment.  She got up as she walked over to her clutch.  She pulled out her phone as she read her missed text message.  She took a deep breath as she typed a response.
“Who is that,” Lucas asked off handedly.  When Riley didn’t answer him, he furrowed his eyebrows.  He knew it was none of his business, but a sense of dread filled him.  “It’s him, isn’t it?”
“Him who,” she asked as she sat her phone down.
“The guy you were dancing with when I showed up tonight.  The guy you’ve been seeing.”
“Yeah,” she answered as she walked back into the living room.
“Is it serious?”
She frowned.  “Obviously not,” she answered, slightly offended that he would even consider the idea that she would cheat on someone.
“I didn’t…I didn’t mean it like that.”
Riley crossed her arms over her chest.  “I don’t have to justify my love life to you.”
“Uh…you do if you’re sleeping with him,” he responded as he stood up.  “I have a right to know who you’ve been with before we…before anything else happens.”
He was right.  She knew he was.  She would want to know if he became intimate with someone else.  It was the safest way to know whether or not she could contract something.  “No,” she grounded out.  “We aren’t…it’s not like that.”
“But you could be right,” he asked as he inched closer to her.  “Intimate…with him.”
“I don’t have to answer that,” she responded.  “I’m dating around…as I’m sure you are too.”  She paused.  “We can’t talk about this.  It’s not…we aren’t…I don’t owe you an explanation.  I’ve been seeing someone who is also friends with Farkle…we went to his party together.  We danced.”  She paused.  “He texted me to make sure I’m ok…that I got home safely.”  She waited a beat.  “You can’t be jealous.”
“I’m not,” he lied as he finally reached her.  “I was just…curious…as I’m sure you would be if you saw me tangled up with someone else on a dance floor.”  He slowly raked his eyes over her.  He didn’t want to fight with her.  Jealousy coursed through his veins, but now wasn’t the time to react.  “You know…you said once we got here that I could dictate what we do.”
She slowly looked up at him as their potential argument quickly melted away.  “What do you want to do?”
He placed his hands on either side of her as he ran his fingers over the straps of her dress.  “I want to spend the next several hours worshipping every square inch of you.”  He slowly slid the straps down her arms.  As soon as the straps were released from her, her dress fell to the floor.  Due to the low cut design of the dress, Riley didn’t wear a bra.  So, there she stood before him, completely naked.
“God,” he breathed as he slowly re-familiarized himself with every square inch of her form.  “You’re so beautiful, Riley.”
“What do you want to do to me, Lucas,” she asked softly as she made no attempt to cover herself up.  “Or what to do you want me to do to you?”
His eyes slowly traveled back up to her chocolate eyes.  “I want you to show me your bedroom.”
//Handprints and footprints on my glass Handprints and good grips all on my ass//
Outwardly, she acted so completely confident in her body that she still made no move to cover up as she walked down the short hallway to her room.  Inwardly, her brain screamed at her to cover up because she was Riley Matthews—the girl who was always insecure.  It was a very strange thing.  When he looked at her, she didn’t feel insecure.  She didn’t feel the need to cover anything up.  She felt beautiful.
As she opened the door to her bedroom, she turned back to him.  She waited for him to enter, but instead he stopped right in front of her.
She held her breath as he leaned into her.  “Do you want this,” he asked her.
She leaned her head back against the doorway.  “What?”
“This?  Our little deal.  Do you want to continue it?”
She swallowed.  “Why…why do you ask?”
“Because…you’re dating other people.  Maybe you’re interested in a relationship with Caleb.  If you are, tell me, and we can end this now…walk away as—“
“Friends,” she offered.
“Yeah,” he answered.
Riley looked at him for a long moment.  This was her chance to come to her senses and stop the insanity.  This was her chance to break the cycle for once and for all.  He gave her an opening; she only had to take it.  The problem was that this whole arrangement was her idea, and she still felt the same way now as she did then.  While she wasn’t permitted to be with him, while she knew that this didn’t make up for the loss she experienced two years ago, she still couldn’t find the words to actually end it.  She had to have any part of him that she could.  This was the only way.  Maybe one day she would gain some sense of control and end it, but she couldn’t do that now.  She was too addicted to him.  “I don’t want to stop,” she answered honestly.  “Do you?”
He did.  He wanted to stop it if it meant that he could have her completely.  Gauging by their earlier conversation, he knew that wasn’t a possibility.  Not now, at least.  He could wait a little longer.  She was worth it.  They were worth it.  He leaned down to her.  “No,” he answered softly.
As he neared her lips, she pulled back from him.  She smiled as a look of confusion graced his face.  “There’s only one rule,” she said as she ran her finger along the collar of his shirt.
He swallowed.  “What’s that?”
Her eyes fell to the floor.  “You can’t step over that threshold if you have any stitch of clothing on.”
His eyes slowly fell to the ground.  He watched as Riley slid her black heels off before she crossed the threshold.  She tossed them toward the corner of the room before she turned back to him.  “That’s it,” she smirked.  “The only rule.”
Lucas’s mouth fell open.  Who was this girl and what had she done with Riley Matthews?  She spoke with such confidence, such allure that he thought his heart had actually stopped beating.  He had always loved the woman who stood before him.  He had spent years trying to show her that she had no need to be insecure about anything—that she was an angel who walked amongst mere mortals.  Had college given her this newfound sense of confidence?  Had their little arrangement taken the pressure off to be perfect?
He had no idea, but as he found himself unbuttoning his shirt, he wasn’t about to question it. He knew she wasn’t perfect, but in that moment, he couldn’t think of a single thing he would ever change about her.  All he wanted to do was to pay homage to her very existence.  He wanted to give her what she deserved—pure, unadulterated pleasure.
As he slid his shirt down his arms, he knew that he would never be worthy of her.  He knew that he should be grateful for the years she had allowed him to be in her orbit.  He knew that one day this would end, and that he would be forced to survive in a world where he wasn’t allowed to pay tribute to her existence.
But not tonight.
No, tonight he was fortunate enough to be given the chance to make sure she knew that she held all of him within the palm of her hand.
He knew the current status of their relationship wasn’t healthy, but he didn’t care.  He knew that one day he would.  He knew that one day either he or she would confront the reality of what they had been doing for the last year and a half, but as Lucas unbuckled his pants, he sent up a silent prayer to whatever deity would listen to him that it wouldn’t end—that their impending conversation would result in a reconciliation.  He already had to live six months in a world without her.  If he had any say in his future, that would never happen again.
//Private show with the music blasting He like to call me Peaches when we get this nasty Red wine drip, we’ll talk that trash Chauffeur eavesdropping trying not to crash//
Riley watched as Lucas undressed.  She was impressed with the way she had been able to command him thus far.  She felt the vodka begin to take effect as he slid his underwear off.  ‘Good,’ she mused as he tossed the last piece of his clothing to the side.  She didn’t want to think logically.  As he stepped over the threshold into her room and strolled toward her, she knew that tonight, she only wanted him.
“Now, its mine turn,” he told her as he stood in front of her.
“A deal is a deal,” she reached behind her head to pull her hair tie out.  Her long brown hair came tumbling down, providing a sheer cover for her breasts.
Lucas ran his fingers down her tangled locks before he tossed her hair over her shoulder.  He needed to see her—all of her.  His index finger slowly slid down her arm.  The right corner of his mouth turned up into a smile when he noticed the trail of goose bumps that quickly followed his touch.  “I want to touch every square inch of you,” he murmured as his other hand gripped her waist.  “I want to hear you moan my name,” he continued as he gently nudged her to him.  “I want you to beg for more.”  His left hand lightly brushed the length of her spine.  When Riley closed her eyes and shuddered in response, Lucas’s smile grew.  “I want you to beg for me,” he finished as his eyes looked down at her.  
Riley slowly opened her eyes when she felt his gaze land on her body.  It was clear that he wanted to take his time with her tonight, but she already wanted nothing more than to shove him on her bed and show him exactly how his gentle caresses had affected her.  When her eyes met his, she took a shaky breath.  His eyes had darkened as his other hand gripped her other side of her waist.  She swallowed.  Maybe she hadn’t had enough to drink over the last few hours.  Maybe she was still too sober to do this without feeling anything for the man in front of her.
As his face leaned in toward hers, she realized that there wasn’t enough alcohol on earth to ever make her truly forget just how much she loved him.
//Oh there daddy, daddy now you ripped my fur Oh baby baby be sweating out my hair Took 45 minutes to get all dressed up We ain't even gonna make it to this club//
He wasn’t sure how long they stood in her bedroom as they kissed.  Time was no longer a concept.  They must have been suspended up in space somewhere.  It could have been seconds, minutes, hours, days.  He had no idea.  All he knew was that this time, their kisses had slowed.  There wasn’t any sense of urgency.  It was gentle, methodical.  He wasn’t lying when he said he wanted to explore every part of her.  When she released a soft moan, he pulled her flush against him.  He had to hear that sound again.  He had to know that she was enjoying this just as much as he was.
Riley’s hands slid up his arms as she finally wrapped her arms around his neck.  She ran her fingers through his hair as she opened her mouth further.  At that moment, she felt like it would never be enough.  Their bodies were completely pressed against one another, his tongue actively engaged in another battle of dominance with hers, and yet, she needed to be closer.  When she felt his hands slide around to cup her ass, she smiled.  When she felt his erection against her pelvis, she slowly spread her legs to allow him to brush against her vagina.
Lucas practically growled at the contact, but it wasn’t directed at the brunette in his arms.  He found himself thrust in his own civil war.  Part of him wanted to take her right then and there, but there was another part of him who wanted to continue with his plan.
He gripped her ass even tighter as he lifted her off the ground.  She wrapped her legs around his waist as he carried her over to her bed.  He finally broke contact with her perfect mouth once her head hit her pillow.  “You aren’t playing fair,” he breathed.
She squirmed under the intensity of his gaze.  With one look, she felt like he could ask her to do anything and she would comply without hesitation.  It was dangerous.  He was dangerous.  Her heart began to race as his eyes slowly ran down the length of her body.  She would give anything to know what he was thinking.
‘You got to slow down, Friar,’ he told himself as he took several deep breaths. They had all night—a luxury neither were used to.  Before, it had always been hurried exchanges between them.  Now he had the chance to truly make love to the woman in front of him.  “You’re incredible,” he breathed as his hand ran down her legs.  He paused when he reached her knees.  He gently nudged them apart as he positioned himself in between them.
Riley said nothing as she watched him slowly plant kisses along her hipbone.  She took a shaky breath as she felt goose bumps pop up along every area he touched.
Lucas smiled against her skin as he methodically kissed down the length of her right leg.  As he slowly made his way up to her hip on her left leg, he noticed her squirm.  “You aren’t enjoying this?”  His tone wasn’t accusatory.  He seemed more amused by her reaction.  He could feel the heat permeating from in between her thighs. He heard every breathy sigh she released as he paid homage to her slender legs.  There was no way on earth she wasn’t enjoying every second of this.
She closed her eyes as he began to kiss along her hipbone once more.  It was one of her tender spots, and he knew it.  She hissed as his teeth gently scraped across her flawless flesh.  “Please,” she moaned before she took a sharp shallow breath.  “Lucas, please.”
He lifted his head as he watched her lean her head back.  For a second, he thought he could hear her heart racing.  He needed to resist her pleas, for now anyway.  He had only began his exploration of her body.  “You can do better than that,” he teased as his hands moved up to cup her breasts.
Riley arched her back at his touch.  She furrowed her eyebrows together as she tried to figure out some way to regain control of her senses.  She knew he was teasing her.  She knew that he wanted to hear her beg.  She hadn’t intended for that to slip from her lips, but as he slowly lowered his head in between her thighs, she knew that it wouldn’t be the last time she begged for him.  
//Take all of me I just wanna be the girl you like, girl you like The kind of girl you like, girl you like//
“Oh my God,” she cried out as she felt herself fly over the edge of ecstasy.  She panted as he slowly lifted his head.  If her eyes were open, she would have noticed the ruthless grin he had as he slowly slid up her body.  Her heart slammed against her chest as she desperately tried to catch her breath.  “Lucas,” she panted as she felt him kiss along her neck.  “Are you sure you haven’t done that with someone in Texas?”  Her mind was completely fogged over as she placed her hand over her forehead.  He had gone down on her before, but it had never been quite that meticulous.  He took his time.  He made sure to pay attention to the areas she was the most sensitive to.  Basically, it was sheer perfection.
He chuckled against her neck.  “No,” he answered as his lips slid down to her collarbone.  “Just you.”
She lowered her hand as she felt her heart rate begin to return to normal.  “I can’t wait to repay you for it,” she sighed happily.
“Well,” he drawled out as he lifted his head.  “It’ll have to wait until next time.”
She frowned.  “Why?”
“My rules, remember?”  He smirked.  “I’m not done yet.”
“This isn’t fair,” she groaned as he lowered his head to kiss the other side of her neck.
Lucas slid his hand down her arm until he reached her hand.  He brushed his fingertips against hers for a moment before he lifted her hand above her head.  “What do you want, Riley?”
“You know what I want,” she whispered as his teeth lightly bit her earlobe.
“And you know what I want,” he retorted as his hands roamed her body.  He lifted his head as his eyes met hers.  He knew he couldn’t ask for the one thing he needed the most in this world, but for now, this could keep him going until the next time he saw her.  “I need to hear it, Riley.  I need to know that you need this just as badly as I do…that you want to be consumed by me.  I need to hear that you know that the fire you feel right now is because of me.”
She stared into his eyes for a long moment.  Something was beginning to shift between them.  She felt it the moment he began to pleasure her.  What had made that orgasm so intense wasn’t the way he used his tongue, or the rhythm of his fingers inside of her, it was because he had made love to her.  He still had feelings for her.  It was something she had tried to deny for a while, but as she looked into his eyes now, she knew she that it couldn’t possibly be anything else.  
They had to end this.  She knew that.  However, knowing and acting were two different things.  She wasn’t strong enough to say goodbye to him yet, because she felt the same way.
All of the reasons she broke up with him came rushing at her.  He was going to be a veterinarian.  That meant a lot more time in school than simply two more years.  What if they reconciled just to argue all the time and become even more miserable than they already were?  She couldn’t stand the thought of him not in her life.
No.  Until everything got settled, she couldn’t tell him.  She wasn’t ready to let him go.  She was stuck in this non-relationship relationship with him.  And while it had its perks, it also felt like the definition of purgatory.
“I need you,” she finally whispered as she forced herself to come back to the present.  She had plenty of time to torment herself later.  Right now, she needed to be in this moment with him.  She needed this taste of paradise.  “Please,” she begged.  “Lucas, I need more.  I need to feel you inside me.”
She didn’t think it was possible, but his eyes darkened further at her words.  Her fingers brushed against his cheek.  “Please,” she pleaded once more.
This was supposed to be his moment.  This was supposed to be the moment he knew whether or not she loved him.  He thought that if she begged for him, that he would know that she needed him as much as he needed her.  As she said the words he longed to hear, he felt himself silently plead with her to take him back.  He thought he would feel some vindication, some newfound certainty that he had taken the upper hand in their tumultuous relationship, but as soon as her hands brushed across his cheek, he knew that he would jump off the Brooklyn Bridge if she asked him to.  He was a slave to the woman underneath him.  He always was, and always would be.  He nearly professed his love in response, but quickly stopped himself.  Now wasn’t the time for that.
His lips finally crashed against hers as she wrapped her legs around his hips.  
//Take all of me I just wanna be the girl you like, girl you like The kinda girl you like Is right here with me//
His right hand lowered to cup her ass while she gripped his shoulders.  He quickly slid into her.  Riley gasped in response as he gave her a moment to get used to the sensation.  He tossed her hair to the side as he sucked on the base of her neck.  The act elicited a moan from the brunette.  She wiggled against him as she buried her head in his neck.  Could they stay just like this forever?  She couldn’t imagine a better form of heaven.
At first he slowly moved against her as she dug her fingernails into his shoulder blades.  She was felt so tight, so perfect.  His sexual experience was only limited to her, but he couldn’t imagine a more perfect fit as he repeatedly filled her.
“Yes,” she groaned against his neck before she began to gently suck on the tender piece of flesh behind his ear.  It was one of the most sensitive spots on his body, and she knew it.  She knew exactly what to do to speed him up, to bend him to her will.  
He both loved and loathed that she held that much power over him.  He moaned as he began to speed up his thrusts.  He took a deep breath as she wrapped her legs even tighter around him.  He wasn’t going to let go yet. This felt too incredible.  He needed this moment to last. He needed to feel this close to her for as long as she would allow him to.
“Lucas,” she panted as he palmed her ass.  “Please,” she begged, “please don’t stop.”
He nearly came right then and there.  That was what he desperately needed to hear.  He needed to hear her plead with him.  He needed to hear her pleasure.  He needed to know that he affected her just as deeply, just as primitively, just as passionately, as she affected him.  She possessed most of his thoughts, even from two thousand miles away.  He needed to know that after he left her once more, that she would think about this night and remember it.  He wanted this moment to be seared into her memory for the rest of her life.  He wanted to ruin every other guy for her.  He wanted to be the only one.  He wanted to be the one.
//Est-ce que tu aimes le sexe? Le sexe, je veux dire: l'activité physique, le coït. Tu aimes ça? Tu ne t'intéresses pas au sexe? Les hommes pensent que les féministes détestent le sexe mais c'est une activité très stimulante et naturelle que les femmes adorent//
She was there.  She was ready to release her third climax of the evening, but she wanted to wait for him.  Nothing felt better than to reach the pinnacle of pleasure with him.  “Lucas…oh God.”
He groaned in response.  If he lived to be 100, he’d never get tired of the way she breathed his name in the bedroom.  The way she said it immediately pushed him to the brink.  “Riley,” he moaned.  She wrapped her arms around his back and pressed her foot against his ass.  The act sent him even further into her, where he finally exploded.
As soon as she felt him climax, Riley followed.  She cried out as she tightened her hold on him.  She didn’t want to let go.  She couldn’t.  He was the only thing that kept her tied to the earth below.  She was on another plane of existence as they both longed to remain in that world.  In that world, nothing else mattered but them.  They didn’t have to worry about labels or figuring out the complexities of their relationship.  They merely existed to please one another.
Soon enough, gravity took control as they slowly fell back to Earth.  Lucas reluctantly pulled out of her as he laid down next to her.  He pulled her to him before he placed a gently kiss to her shoulder.  
Riley sighed contentedly as she closed her eyes.  “That was…”
He smiled against her shoulder.  “Was what?”
She searched her brain.  Had she spoken?  If so, what did she say?  She wasn’t even entirely sure where she was at the moment.  She finally let out a soft chuckle.  “I have no idea.”  She took a deep breath.  “I need something to drink.”  She turned her head toward him.  “Do you want something?”
“I’ll get it,” he offered as he reluctantly untangled himself from the goddess next to him.  “What would you like?  Water or something stronger?  I make a mean vodka cranberry…or so I’m told.”
She smirked as she caught his reference to the last time they met up.  “Both sound heavenly,” she answered.
“Both, it is.”
Riley sat up as she watched him leave her bedroom without a stitch of clothing on.  “Damn,” she mumbled as she fell back on the bed.  How was it possible that she felt like she was on cloud nine while at the same time, also felt an overwhelming sense of grief?  Tears quickly formed in her eyes.  This wasn’t allowed.  She couldn’t cry right now.  She didn’t want to think about what comes next.  She wanted to live in the moment with him.
She sat back up as she wiped her eyes.  She needed to escape for a few moments and regroup.  She wandered into her bathroom and turned on the shower.  As soon as she stepped in, she felt the water scald her, but she didn’t care.  She needed to feel something other than the rush of loneliness that had suddenly captured her.
//Take all of me I just wanna be the girl you like, girl you like The kind of girl you like, girl you like//
She wasn’t sure how long she stood in the shower before he entered the bathroom.  Neither of them said anything as he slipped into the shower behind her.  He hissed when he felt the scalding water.  “Jesus, Riley.”  He noticed the red marks on her skin and quickly turned the hot water down.  “Are you ok?”
She slowly turned to face him.  She wasn’t sure what time it was, but it was still dark outside.  They still had a few more hours at least.  She had a little while longer to pretend that everything was ok, that whatever they had was normal, and not the worst idea in the history of everything.  “I’m fine,” she smiled as she stepped closer to him.  Her eyes slowly traveled down his body.  “You’re ready again?”  He was completely insatiable.  She would never be able to keep up with him.
“Maybe in a little while,” he responded as he reached for her loofah.  “Right now, I’m thinking a shower…the drinks…a little relaxation.”
“I’m not sure that’s allowed,” she responded before she turned away from him.  
Her comment stung slightly, but he wasn’t about to argue with her after what had just transpired in her bedroom.  “You know,” he began as he reached for her soap, “You did say that we were friends with benefits.  Maybe in between the benefits, we could actually…be friends.”  He ran the loofah along her back.  “Friends can drink and hang out, right?”
He had a point.  They didn’t talk at all unless he was in town, and before tonight, they only had a very limited amount of time to release their sexual frustration on one another.  Maybe trying out the friends side of their arrangement would allow her the chance to become more comfortable with what they were now?  Maybe that way, she wouldn’t try to hide from him next time?  “You’re right.  Friends hang out…and we’re friends, right?”
‘For now,’ his mind screamed at him.  “Yeah.  Yeah…we’re friends.”  They had always been friends, but it had also always been more than that between them.  Was he happy with their current relationship status?  No.  Of course not.  He wouldn’t be satisfied until they were back together, but he could wait a little longer to plead his case to her.
//Take all of me I just wanna be the girl you like, girl you like//
They laid back in her bed as they watched tv for a little while.  He briefly wondered when she would kick him out of her place, but halfway through the second episode of ‘Red Planet Diaries’ she draped her arm across his waist and placed her head on his chest.  He was slightly confused at first.  He didn’t know that cuddling was acceptable in their non-relationship relationship, not that he would ever complain about it.
When her breathing deepened, he knew that she had fallen asleep.  He wasn’t about to disturb her for the world.  He wrapped his arm around her back and lightly traced out the three words he had restrained himself from saying the entire night.  ‘I love you,’ he thought as he closed his eyes and slowly drifted off to sleep.
Riley slowly opened her eyes when she felt Lucas’ arm loosen its grip on her waist.  He was asleep.  She wasn’t entirely sure why she had pretended to fall asleep.  No.  That’s a lie.  She knew why she did it.  She didn’t want him to leave.  She wanted him to stay the night.  She wanted him to stay forever.
She took a deep breath.  Forever is a long time, and it felt like the universe had transpired to keep them apart for some reason.  She had tried to move on.  She thought that she was on the way to doing that with Caleb, but one night with Lucas changed everything.  She needed to end things with Caleb.  Farkle was right and she didn’t want to lead him on.  She wasn’t ready for another relationship.  She wasn’t sure if she would ever be ready.  She was fairly certain that she would be in love with Lucas Friar for the rest of her life, but she couldn’t have him.  Not now.  Not while they were in school.  Not while they lived on opposite sides of the country.  She wasn’t going to be the reason why he missed out.  As much as it killed her, as much as she loathed herself and the current predicament she found herself in, she couldn’t give him up yet.  
//The kinda girl you like Is right here with me//
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