#which is to say i am NOT sorry for ending on a Conqueror of Shamballa joke

[businesstiramisu]

@canyourfavesurvivecastledracula -- I'm trying out the "argue at you" approach. tagging you b/c you don't have submissions open and I think this long enough to be an annoying ask. I don't think you know or care about this character, but *I* do, so here's my argument :P

Can Alphonse Elric survive Castle Dracula?

[the answer depends a LOT on which part of which canon we're using, but we're going to go vaguely with "middle part". That is to say, armor]

Al has one HUGE advantage against Dracula, which is that he has no corporeal human body (for now). He's not completely free of blood though -- if Dracula learns about the blood seal tethering his soul to this mortal plane, I fully believe he's learned enough Dark Magicks at Scholomance to fuck it up. So the question is, would he find out? Al is usually pretty good at hiding it… unless he just decides to tell people. So it depends on how their dynamic plays out.

Al would accept the crucifix from the townsfolk, and listen to their other advice. Even if he doesn't believe them, he's a polite boy, and you never know what information might be useful! Maybe their folktales have clues about the Philosopher's Stone, you never know. (Also in one version of canon he can understand German, so let's say language barriers aren't an issue.)

Dracula is bemused when an alchemist in full plate armor turns up asking to see his library instead of the solicitor he requested. Alchemists? He hasn't run into any of those in a while. But hey, the lawyer's not here yet, he's got time to fuck with this guy and have an extra snack.

The shaving incident wouldn't happen obviously, but Dracula might realize something is amiss because Al doesn't sleep. Or will he? Does Dracula pay enough attention to know when normal humans should be sleeping and Al isn't? If so, he will probably investigate, push boundaries, or stage a confrontation until he finds out Al's deal, and then he will be PISSED. No lawyer, and now no snack! This is bullshit! From here on out, it's WAR. If not, then...

If Al realizes this is a kidnapping and not a library loan, he will play along. He might not even mind. He's been kidnapped before, and it always worked out fine. Dracula might be more creepy and threatening than his other kidnappers, but Al's dealt with a wide variety of creepy and threatening in his quest, I just don't think he'd be fazed. And he is, as already mentioned, a polite person who would want to be a respectful guest! Hmm kinda creepy that he just implied I'll never leave this place alive... oh well! Nice table setting, sir, compliments to your staff.

Being a respectful guest might not extend to staying in his room as instructed; he's a curious guy and only a stickler for the rules compared to his brother. The girlies aren't a problem for him, because he's still wearing the crucifix, but they might clue him in that Something Is Wrong and lead to Al himself forcing a confrontation with Dracula.

But even if everything goes smoothly, Al would eventually get bored with Dracula's library (if there was anything useful about the Philosopher's Stone in there, Dracula wouldn't be a vampire). At some point, Al would decide this kidnapping is over, and he would provoke the confrontation in trying to leave.

I haven't written any reason for Al to tell Dracula about his fatal weakness, so I'm gonna say Dracula can't actually do much to Al; but unfortunately I don't think Al can harm Dracula either. I don't actually remember what allowed Jonathan to hit him with a shovel but I think it involved special circumstances that do not apply to Al. However, Dracula also can't prevent Al from leaving -- neither thousand foot cliffs nor wolves are much of an obstacle to him. (Well actually, if you physically overpower him and take the armor apart, he can't walk away -- but people almost never think of that, and Dracula probably won't either.)

Which is all to say that Alphonse can survive Castle Dracula, but he probably won't have as much useful intel as Jonathan did. Mind you, he took notes! He just didn't get personal experience with as many of Dracula's powers.

And of course, his goal after this is to track down his brother -- if anyone can figure out how to kill a vampire it's Ed. Where the fuck did he get to, anyways? He'd better not be stranded in Weimar Germany. Al can absolutely walk to Munich from here, but waiting around 25-30 years for Ed to turn up would be a drag.

[obligitory-fma-blog]

What do you think a crossover would be like if the Elric Brothers from Brotherhood met the Elric Brothers from 2003/Conqueror of Shamballa?

Oooo good question. It would definitely be interesting to see, I’ve always wanted to write a fic about it, but uhh… am lazy :,) so here’s some dialogue:

BH!Ed: so I ended up being taller, eh? Finally I can call someone else short

03!Ed: Hey watch it, you’re talking to yourself idiot!

*argument ensues*

BH!Ed: So uh… where’d you end up after everything?

03!Ed: In a whole other world. Why, where’d you end up?

BH!Ed: I ended up getting Al’s body back- wait, did you say another world?!

*cue explanation about 03’s ending*

*They then go on to discuss differences in their worlds, and eventually go into nerd spiel about alchemy*

(Honestly a lot of people forget that Edward Elric is one of the biggest nerds in the series like. He’d be discussing the implications of alchemy powered by deaths in another world (03) vs alchemy powered by changes in tectonic plates and what not (BH) you know? He’s just a whole nerd at the end of the day, which is the best part about him.)

I think that dialogue with the Alphonse’s would go a little more like this:

BH!Al: You got your body back too? Awesome!

03!Al: yeah! After I became a philosophers stone and all that-

BH!Al: you what?! How!

*cue 03 explanation*

BH!Al: oh… I’m so sorry….

03!Al: it’s ok! I ended up back with Ed, so I’m happy. Someone’s gotta keep an eye on him after all.

*Both nod solemnly, remembering shit their brother got into while they weren’t there to help*

*eventually they both discuss the implications of alchemy because they both are big nerds like their brothers*

(Honestly both Alphonse’s would end up sitting in a circle with a bunch of cats talking about stupid things their brothers have done and I am HERE FOR IT.)

Honestly I really wish they did a crossover or something between the two shows. It’d be so cool to see how different the counterparts of all the characters ended up despite essentially starting in the same place. Agh it would’ve been cool. But that’s what fanfic is for!

Thank you so much for the question! This was really fun to answer, definitely one of my favorite asks. Just a reminder to everyone reading that the ask box is open and I’m checking it now, so ask away! Thanks again!

[sun-flower-siren]

10, 16, 18? ((Sorry I ask lotsa questions

I don’t mind a bit, dude! Ask all you want C:

10: Zodiac Sign.

I am an Aries! I am a beautiful ram! Unless you wanted my Chinese zodiac, in which case I was born in the Year of the Tiger C;

16: Favorite Anime.

Hooooooooooooh boyyy….

You guys ready for this one? Probably gonna be another longer one.

So, my favorite anime of all time is Fullmetal Alchemist, hands down. The original, though. Not brotherhood. I can’t make myself watch Brotherhood.

FMA is an anime that will always have a special place in my heart. The story was amazing, it was a beautiful balance of hilarious and dark angst, and the art style is one I did my best to emulate for about 4 years of my life. And the way the anime itself ended was perfectly heartbreaking.

And then we had The Conqueror of Shamballa. Which was also fan-fucking-tastic, but if go into every reason on that, we’ll be here all damn day.

Anyway, since I don’t talk/blog about anime enough (which I should really fix, huh?), I also really love Hetalia, Yuri on Ice, Ouran High School Host Club, Your Lie in April, Hetalia, and Wolf’s Rain.

18: Do you collect anything?

Intentionally? Not really.

I mean, I guess you could say I collect posters? I’ve got a lot of those… And I sorta collect succulents? I’ve got four right now :>

Of course, unintentionally, I collect the disappointment of my family and peers ;u;

I meAN

UH DISNEY MOVIES.

YEAH.