#which is really hard for us overseas

[lilies-are-azules]

Good news friends! Morimu is now, until September 30th, available on some Japanese streaming services, and one of them, DMM TV, allows foreign credit cards *everyone cheers*. The bad news is you're gonna need a very good vpn and it’s without subtitles.

Recommendations:

DMM TV has a free trial of 30 days. I recommend creating an account after July 29th because is when all the Ops will be available to watch because they are uploading one Op per week.

About the subtitles… Well… I think you can watch Morimu without subtitles and still enjoy it. My first time watching Morimu was without subtitles, and I still understood (mostly) because the dialogue is nothing we haven't read in the manga. There are some changes or additions, but not many because Morimu has tried to stay as faithful to the manga as possible. Also there are people who are translating the songs so there are alternative options.

About the vpn… I found a vpn that gives you a free trial of 7 days through Android. It works well, and you can use those 7 free days on any device. That’s another reason why I recommend watching Morimu when all the Ops are available.

Edit 29/07: Important update. Currently, the VPN is not working, which is strange because two weeks ago it was. I'm trying to look for alternative options. If it's working for you, please let me know 🙏🙏

[xcziel]

ugh. getting the urge to travel again

[fairuzfan]

I'm to the point where if I hear you're endorsing/voting for Kamala Harris and you're publicly getting mad at people for not voting for her, I'm not even going to listen what you have to say, you've made it clear you have to strong principles to guide your decisions beyond "what's worse for me personally?" I think Harris voters have no actual ideologies to live by, despite claiming they do, and I fundamentally don't respect them for it. It's one thing to be angry at people who won't vote for Harris, but it's another thing to pretend you're doing it because you have some sort of moral authority and not basing it off pure selfishness. You think that solidarity is posting about things and that's it. You refuse to make yourself uncomfortable, even momentarily. And you get mad at people who are willing to go through discomfort for the sake of others. You call them names, ans claim that THEY are the selfish ones in this scenario. You've given up on making a change in the world for the better, or maybe you were never interested in it. All of your arguments pale in comparison to reality, because Harris is actively funding a genocide. She has even refused to acknowledge a reality in which she does not fund that genocide. Has made such a thing clearer and clearer. All my problems here in the imperial core are secondary to that. I'm about to go through multiple personal issues that are made increasingly hard by political factors and I still think that's nothing in comparison to what Palestinians and Lebanese are going through overseas. You've placed yourselves as the ultimate victims in the world and to me it's laughable and completely out of touch with just how fucked everyone else is because of the imperial beast that is Amerikkka. And speak nothing of the way the victims of Amerikkkan imperialism on Turtle Island bear the brunt of societies' woes for your personal comfort and refusal to make any meaningful change. Not ev baby steps! You think trump is an accidental anomaly and not a product of a larger issue within white amerikkkan politics. Is it not shocking to you that so many people here are voting for trump so enthusiastically?

Seeing things like the weaponization of personal identity, like "Muslims for Harris," used so plainly is an insult to the ideas of internationalism that you all claim to follow. What use is solidarity with the victims of imperialism if you refuse to acknowledge the entirety of the imperial complex? That includes the democrats you hold so dear as well as the Republicans? What use is any of this if you only think for yourself?

You claim to be thinking of others, and that's why you vote for Harris... but what is so incomprehensible to me is the comfort in which you accept the inevitability of Palestinian deaths. Why are you so willing to accept that reality? Why are you comfortable with that reality? It shocks me and disgusts me in a way that I can not really describe. You lot argue and argue and argue, but in the end, the difference between you and me is that I refuse to engage in a reality where Palestinians must die in any case. You have yet to refuse that. In actuality, you all refuse the baby steps, the bare minimum, of refusal to engage in continuation of that reality. And because of that, I do not take you seriously, nor do I view you as being moral in your decision to sacrifice Palestinians.

[homo-house]

hey uh so I haven't seen anyone talking about this here yet, but

the amazon river, like the biggest river in the fucking world, in the middle of the amazon fucking rainforest, is currently going through its worst drought since the records began 121 years ago

picture from Folha PE

there's a lot going on but I haven't seen much international buzz around this like there was when the forest was on fire (maybe because it's harder to shift the narrative to blame brazil exclusively as if the rest of the world didn't have fault in this) so I wanted to bring this to tumblr's attention

I don't know too many details as I live in the other side of the country and we are suffering from the exact opposite (at least three cyclones this year, honestly have stopped counting - it's unusual for us to get hit by even one - floods, landslides, we have a death toll, people are losing everything to the water), but like, I as a brazilian have literally never seen pictures of the river like this before. every single city in the amazonas state is in a state of emergency as of november 1st.

pictures by Adriano Liziero (ig: geopanoramas)

we are used to seeing images of rio negro and solimões, the two main amazon river affluents, in all their grandiose and beauty and seeing these pictures is really fucking chilling. some of our news outlets are saying the solimões has turned to a sand desert... can you imagine this watery sight turning into a desert in the span of a year?

while down south we are seeing amounts of rain and hailstorms the likes of which our infrastructure is simply not built to deal with, up north people who have built everything around the river are at a loss of what to do.

the houses there that are built to float are just on the ground, people who depend on fishing for a living have to walk kilometers to find any fish that are still alive at all, the biodiversity there is at risk, and on an economic level it's hard to grasp how people from the northern states are getting by at all - the main means of transport for ANYTHING in that region is via the river water. this will impact the region for months to come. it doesnt make a lot of sense to build a lot of roads bc it's just better to use the waterway system, everything is built around or floats on the river after all. and like, the water level is so incomprehensibly low the boats are just STUCK. people are having a hard time getting from one place to another - keep in mind the widest parts of the river are over 10 km apart!!

this shit is really serious and i am trying not to think about it because we have a different kind of problem to worry about down south but it's really terrifying when I stop to think about it. you already know the climate crisis is real and the effects are beyond preventable now (we're past global warming, get used to calling it "global boiling"). we'll be switching strategies to damage control from now on and like, this is what it's come to.

I don't like to be alarmist but it's hard not to be alarmed. I'm sorry that I can't end this post with very clear intructions on how people overseas can help, there really isn't much to do except hope the water level rises soon, maybe pray if you believe in something. in that regard we just have to keep pressing for change at a global level; local conditions only would not, COULD NOT be causing this - the amazon river is a CONTINENTAL body of water, it spans across multiple countries. so my advice is spread the word, let your representatives know that you're worried and you want change towards sustainability, degrowth and reduced carbon emissions, support your local NGOs, maybe join a cause, I don't know? I recommend reading on ecological and feminist economics though

however, I know you can help the affected riverine families by donating to organizations dedicated to helping the region. keep in mind a single US dollar, pound or euro is worth over 5x more in our currency so anything you donate at all will certainly help those affected.

FAS - Sustainable Amazon Fundation

Idesam - Sustainable Developent and Preservation Institute of Amazonas

Greenpeace Brasil - I know Greenpeace isn't the best but they're one of the few options I can think of that have a bridge to the international world and they are helping directly

There are a lot of other smaller/local NGOs but I'm not sure how you could donate to them from overseas, I'll leave some of them here anyway:

Projeto Gari

Caritás Brasileira

If you know any other organizations please link them, I'll be sure to reblog though my reach isn't a lot

thank you so much for reading this to the end, don't feel obligated to share but please do if you can! even if you just read up to here it means a lot to me that someone out there knows

also as an afterthought, I wanted to expand on why I think this hasn't made big news yet: because unlike the case of the 2020 forest fires, other countries have to hold themselves accountable when looking at this situation. while in 2020 it was easier to pretend the fires were all our fault and people were talking about taking the amazon away from us like they wouldn't do much worse. global superpowers have no more forests to speak of so I guess they've been eyeing what latin america still has. so like this bit of the post is just to say if you're thinking of saying anything of the sort, maybe think of what your own country has done to contribute to this instead of blaming brazil exclusively and saying the amazon should be protected by force or whatever

[princessbellecerise]

First Impressions

Summary ✩ If you want to make a good impression on your boyfriend’s family, then you probably shouldn’t get caught naked together

Warnings ✩ Smut, college!jace, Jace likes slow passionate sex I don’t make the rules, so many innuendos, Jace and the reader literally get caught by his whole family, humor, lowkey a crack fic

“But what if they don’t like me?”

“Babe, relax. They’ll love you.”

Jace stroked your arm lovingly as you sat on his dorm room bed, nerves and anxiety nearly eating you alive.

You were in the middle of finals, and not only that, Jace’s family had decided to come up for the weekend and visit him before winter vacation.

Every year, he usually travelled back overseas to be with them, but this year his family decided to stay in the United States and celebrate the holidays over here.

As his girlfriend, you were understandably worried because it meant that you’d be meeting them for the first time. Jace tried to reassure you that your fears didn’t matter, and that they’d love you despite what you thought, but you simply weren’t convinced.

“But what if they hate me?” You continued, chewing on your lip as you looked at him. “What if…what if they think I’m too…American or something?”

“What? Too American?” Jace snorted. “What does that even mean?” You groaned.

“It means they might hate me, or my accent, and they might try and set you up with a British girl or something, I don’t know.”

To your displeasure, Jacaerys merely laughed which made you pout.

“Jace! This is serious!” You whined at him, smacking his arm playfully. He shook his head.

“Like I said, they will love you and they will be very excited to see you. Especially my mother. She’s been dying to meet you ever since I told her about you.”

“But—!”

“No buts! Everything will be fine,” Jacaerys cooed, and you sighed as you buried your head in his chest.

“I hope you’re right,” You mumbled miserably, not wanting to even think about him being wrong. You loved Jace so much, and you couldn’t imagine not being accepted by the ones he loved the most. No matter how many times he reassured you that they would, the thought still terrified you to your core.

“Of course I am,” Jacaerys leaned his head down and pressed a kiss to your forehead, wrapping his arms around you as he did. “How could anyone not love you? You’re perfect.”

Quickly, a small rush of embarrassment flooded to your cheeks but luckily it was hidden.

“You really think so?” You mumbled again, and this time you felt Jace pulling you away from his chest so that you could look him in the eye.

Two pools of warm honey held nothing but confidence and reassurance as he nodded. “Of course,” Jace confirmed sweetly, and then he sealed his promise with a kiss.

Smiling, you welcomed his lips and relaxed as your fears began to melt away. As always, Jace had a habit of being able to calm you with the slightest touch, and now as you felt his plump lips against yours, your worries evaporated.

It was like magic how you could be so worked up one minute, and then completely like putty in his arms in the next. Forgetting your anxiety, you deepened the kiss with Jace and panted as you felt his hands roam over your body.

“Shouldn’t we…shouldn’t we be getting ready?” You asked him quietly, pulling away as you felt him hardening underneath you.

“We’ve still got,” Jace picked up his phone and tapped on the screen, grinning when it read 5:52pm. “Two hours until dinner, I think? That’s plenty of time.”

You grinned back and sank into another kiss, this time bringing your hands up to tangle in his curls. They were soft against your fingertips; a weapon you used to render your boyfriend defenseless as you crawled on top of him.

Moaning, Jace held your hips as you began to grind them, feeling the way his cock got hard as you did so. Jace’s hockey hoodie and your thin sleep shorts left minimum barriers between the two of you, but still, it was too much.

You needed to feel him as desire pooled in between your legs, a little wet spot forming on the crotch of your shorts.

“Jace. Help me take this off,” You said against his lips, and Jace, all too eager, obeyed.

You felt his strong hands tug on the band of your shorts, pulling them off and throwing them across the room. Then, Jace reached for the hoodie and pulled it up just enough to expose your tits, but he kept it on you because he loved the way you looked in it.

“Fuck you’re gorgeous,” Jacaerys groaned, leaning up to suck on one of your buds as you continued rocking against him.

The feeling of his soft tongue made your core clench with anticipation, throwing your head back as you panted. You weren’t really in a rush, so Jace took his time; sucking and biting and licking your flesh as he pleased.

Already, you could feel the marks on your skin forming, and you lightly pushed his chest to get him to stop.

“Don’t give me a hickey right before I meet your family,” You warned, but the damage was done and Jace was quite proud as he admired his work.

“Oops.” Your boyfriend smirked up at you, and then you squealed as he flipped you around. Now, your back was against his chest and Jace propped your hips up so that your ass was in the air.

You could feel him begin to grind against you now, pressing his hard cock against your body as his kissed his way down it.

He started with your neck, nipping at your sweet spots before eventually going lower. Jace pushed the hoodie up so he could kiss along your spine, leaving little marks wherever he pleased. While he did that, you shivered as his hands occupied themselves with your cunt, teasing your wet folds and ghosting over your clit.

“Jace,” You whined in the pillow, desperate for more friction as you wiggled against him. You were burning up, aching for his touch; and luckily your boyfriend wasn’t a cruel man.

“I’ve got you, Princess. Don’t worry,” He cooed softly. You felt the bed dip as he moved in between your thighs, placing a delicate kiss to each before going where you needed him most.

“God…” You moaned, biting the pillow as Jace’s lips attached to your cunt, tongue darting out to taste you.

He went slow at first, dipping his tongue in between your folds and circling your entrance. You whined as Jace pushed in, tongue-fucking you while his fingers came to play with your clit. His other hand occupied itself with steadying your trembling hips, keeping your cunt firmly pressed against his face as he messily ate you out from behind.

“Fuck, fuck! Jace!”

His name fell from your lips like a chant, your thighs shaking as your orgasm approached. If you could, you would’ve tugged on his curls but you had to settle for gripping the bedsheets as you made a mess on his tongue.

To Jace, you tasted so sweet that he just couldn’t help but to lap it all up; face getting drenched with the evidence of your arousal. He reached out to message your trembling thighs, placing little kisses on them before turning you over.

As he did, you couldn’t help but think how hot your boyfriend looked after eating you out. His face was glistening with your cum, his pupils blown and eager for more.

He couldn’t get the condom on fast enough, and you nearly started drooling when he teased his swollen cock head in between your folds.

You were still sensitive by the time he started to push in, but you welcomed his cock and eagerly held his body close to yours. As always, Jace held your hand and let out a shaky breath as he entered you. With his forehead pressed to yours, he gazed into your eyes and sank into your cunt until there was nothing left for him to give.

“Fuck!”

The two of you moaned in unison as he bottomed out, Jace trembling above you as your warm cunt squeezed him. He leaned down to capture your lips in a long, deep kiss, loving to make out with you while he fucked you.

It was one thing to be inside of you, but with Jace, he always felt the need to be consumed by you, taking you in every way he could think of. His lips upon yours, his hands holding yours, his cock deep inside of you.

The closeness, the sheer intimacy of it all always drove your boyfriend crazy, as he wanted to think of and feel nothing but expect for you. No matter what, Jace always poured everything he had into you—every bit of love, want, desire.

You could feel it in the way he moved his hips, desperately chasing the high only you could bring him to. You spread yourself eagerly below him, taking, wanting, craving for the same things.

Together, you held one another as your bodies moved in sync, giving and taking and fitting together like two pieces of a puzzle.

Jace’s cock began to tighten as he neared his release. Likewise, your core clenched, your head becoming fuzzy as he brushed against your sweet spot over and over again. Just as you pulled away from his kiss, your own lips—plump and swollen—let out a gasp as you came around him. All that you could see, all you taste and feel was Jacaerys as pleasure completely took over your senses.

And then, not even a second later Jace was collapsing as well, panting as he spilled himself into the condom.

You had the pleasure of hearing his sweet sounds as he did, rubbing his back and his ass gently to coax him. By the time he was finished, the condom was filled to the brim and Jace pulled it off, lazily tying it up and throwing it in the trashcan.

Pink puffy lips, bruised from kissing you and biting them so hard when he came, once again ghosted over your skin, Jace leaving a kiss on your forehead before collapsing beside you.

“I love you,” Your boyfriend said gently, taking your face into his hands. Soft cheek pressed against soft cheek as you curled into one another, still panting and glowing and smiling from your highs.

“I love you too,” You giggled as he squeezed your cheeks, pressing them together so your lips jutted out like a fish. “I lobe you, I lobe you, I lobe you, I lobe you—”

Jace laughed at your disordered speech, just about to comment on it when suddenly the door flung open, and Cregan Stark stood with his entire family behind him as he grinned.

“Surprise!”

“What the—?”

The smile on your lips died as you froze in shock, eyes coming to settle on the plethora of people that filed into the room.

They hadn’t noticed it yet, not until it was too late. There were six people in total, all too busy grinning with anticipation and chattering excitedly until they noticed exactly what they had stumbled upon—a very naked Jacaerys and his girlfriend.

“Oh,” Rhaena, who you had seen before in FaceTime calls and followed on Instagram, was the first to notice your predicament. Their eyes widened when they looked at Jace, stuttering but not able to warn anyone in time. “I…”

“Oh shit!”

“Are they—?”

“Dude!”

Jace was much faster than you to react; shouting at Cregan and telling him to close the door while his roommate stood there in shock.

Behind him, you could hear laughter and horrified shouts as Jace’s family looked at the scene; his step-sister Baela cracking up while who you presumed was his mother gasped.

“Jacaerys—” The white haired woman blinked, dumbfounded, and of course you would have the absolute unfortunace of locking eyes with her right before Jace exclaimed,

“Mom! Get out!”

The door slammed shut just as Jace began to scurry up, his face a violent shade of red as you blinked. In that moment, you couldn’t tell if you wanted to scream or just straight up die as you looked at Jace, horrified as you covered your naked body.

“I didn’t…I didn’t know…” He rapidly shook his head, trying to explain but you could obviously tell he wasn’t expecting his family to come here.

You were supposed to meet them at the restaurant at seven, and you still thought you had time to get yourself presentable.

You wanted to make a good first impression on the people who would hopefully be your future in laws, but now though, there was no such luck. His whole family had seen you naked, and now you had no fucking clue how you’d ever leave this room without wanting the ground to swallow you up.

“Oh my god. Oh my god. What are we going to do?” You asked, panicked as Jace paced around the room. “Your mother—Jace, your mom just saw my fucking pussy!”

“Or maybe she didn’t,” Jace countered, trying to delude himself and you into thinking the situation wasn’t that bad. It didn’t work. “Maybe they…maybe they only saw us in the covers, but didn’t see anything else.”

“Yeah right,” You scoffed, knowing damn well that wasn’t the case. “I’m pretty sure they’ve seen more of me than you ever have!”

“Shit!”

Jace ran a hand through his curls as commotion sounded outside. Cregan panicking and Baela laughing and Luke so horrified all he could do was stare at the wall.

They were all waiting out there to meet you but, “I can’t ever show my face again,” You wailed. “I was right. They’re gonna hate me and think I’m a slut and they’re never gonna want to see me again!”

“That’s not true,” Jace insisted, shaking his head. “Babe, they would never think that about you.”

“Yeah! We’d never—” Rhaena’s voice became muffled as Rhaenyra scolded them, but the fact that they could hear what you were saying just made you want to die even more.

“Jesus Christ. Is there no end to the embarrassment?” You groaned, flopping on Jace’s bed. You buried your face into the pillow while Jace rubbed circles on your back, torn between comforting you and yelling at Rhaena to fuck off.

“It’s alright. It’ll be alright,” Your boyfriend said awkwardly. “The best thing that we can do is to just go out there, and forget this ever happened, yeah? I’m sure after a few drinks no one will even remember this.”

Which might’ve been true, if half his family wasn’t under 21 and couldn’t drink in the USA.

You groaned. “Ihatemylife.”

“What?”

“I said I hate my life,” You pouted at Jace, pulling your face from the covers. “Only something like this could happen to me.” But eventually, you agreed to just bite the bullet.

You knew you couldn’t hide forever, and as much you wanted to, you couldn’t avoid the six people standing outside waiting for you and Jace either.

No matter how undignified you felt, you still got ready and you took a deep breath as Jace grabbed your hand.

“Let’s go meet them properly this time, shall we?”

—

“So how’s the bed—I mean, the bread! Sorry!” Luke blushed deeply while you sank into your seat, utterly mortified while Jace tensed beside you.

He still had yet to relax even though the incident had happened hours ago, and his family was graceful enough not to mention it save for a few accidental innuendos and stray giggles as they recalled the moment.

Cregan, who was also invited along, hadn’t stopped sending either of you apologetic looks since it was his idea to bring them to surprise Jace.

The poor guy had a wanted to do a nice thing for his best friend and ended up humiliating him in the process.

But you were so embarrassed you didn’t even care, not being able to even look at Luke while you answered.

“It’s good,” You told him meekly, even though it was obvious you had barely touched it. “A little hard, but...”

Daemon snickered as you suddenly stopped, stomach dropping when you realized you said. “I-I mean…I didn’t…”

“Babe,” Jace gave you look as he squeezed your hand under the table, shooting his step father an angry glare. “He knows what you meant. Right, Luke?”

“Yeah.” The sophomore in high school didn’t say anything else as he picked at his appetizer.

You sighed.

Quite frankly, it was awkward all around, making you feel like you should have just stayed in your dorm room.

What was supposed to be a normal family dinner was now overshadowed by the incident, and you felt like no matter what you did, something brought it up.

The last thing you wanted to do was make a bad first impression, and you had made an impression alright.

You cleared your throat. “So how was the flight?” You asked no one in particular, desperately wanting to change the subject. You didn’t think you’d survive another minute of this if not, but thankfully Rhaena ended up being the one who answered you.

“It was boring. Kind of long, actually,” They shrugged. And then they added, “T-The flight, I mean,” which only made the situation worse.

Baela shook her head. “I don’t know. It was kind of short to me,” She grinned, laughing when Jace glared and kicked her under the table.

“Baela!” Rhaenyra scolded her, shaking her head. Like you, the woman seemed to be at her wits end with how much more she could take.

It was embarrassing enough for you to experience it, but you couldn’t imagine catching your own son naked. Rhaenyra was probably the only one more mortified than you and Jace, and so she was a bit more sympathetic than the rest of her family.

“That’s enough. Stop torturing the poor girl, will you?”She warned. “Y/N, honey, I’m so sorry,” She then said gently, and you gave her a tight smile, hating yourself for not ordering a stronger drink.

Thankfully though, you were saved by the waitress coming around. You and Jace let out a sigh of relief as the food momentarily distracted everybody. Baela stopped smirking, eyeing her spaghetti with joy. Daemon no longer stared at you accusingly, just waiting to for the chance to jump in and embarrass Jace. Eveything seemed fine again; that is until she set Jace’s entree down.

“And here is that shrimp for you, sir,” She smiled at him politely, and you could see Cregan absolutely loosing it as he stood up.

“Fuck—I’m sorry man. I can’t, I just…” He crackled all the way to the bathroom, his laugher echoing through the whole restaurant. A few people stared at him as he passed, but the waitress didn’t seem too bothered by it.

She turned to Rhaenyra, handing her a red drink and said, “And here is that cocktail for you.”

Rhaenyra stared at the drink, not even knowing what to say as her children burst into giggles. Not even Daemon could hold himself back, laughing into his wine while Jace laid his head on the table.

“Is there anything else I can get for you all?” The waitress asked, chewing her lip at the scene. She obviously didn’t understand what was going on or why everything she said was so funny.

“A gun,” Jace whispered from beside you, catching her attention. His red face was as buried into his arms due to permanent shame. “I would like for you to bring me a gun, please.”

“Excuse me?” Your waitress reeled back, her eyes going wide at Jace’s words. The tray she carried momentarily shook in her hands, and—not wanting for her to call the police and make this an even worse situation—you quickly stepped in.

“I-I think he means that we’re all satisfied, thank you,” You told her weakly.

Your whole body burned from shame and embarrassment, and you were surprised that you didn’t catch on fire right then and there. You certainly wished you would, as it would save you from the absolute worst dinner of your life.

The woman nodded slowly. “Alright then. Enjoy,” She said cautiously.

And then, without missing a beat, Baela looked straight at you and giggled. “Oh, I’m sure she did.”

[covid-safer-hotties]

To My Unmasked Friend in the Fifth Year of COVID - By: Anna Holmes - Published Aug 17, 2024

I’m going to be honest with you, because I love you, and you deserve nothing but honesty. I’m going to try really hard not to be angry while I do it, but it’s probably going to slip out every now and again. But I need you to hear me out, all right?

By now, we’ve talked about my reality. My personal struggle with long COVID, the isolation I live in, why I am so angry all the time.

But let’s talk about you. You just went to a big convention overseas. You got on a plane, got a little gussied up, talked shop with some insiders, geeked out over awards and merch, ate, drank, were merry, left with your social cup and your heart full.

You’re a good person. We wouldn’t be friends otherwise! You’d never dream of tripping a person with a red and white cane, using the r-word, excluding a disabled person from an event because of something they can’t help.

You might even acknowledge that the COVID response from governments and organizations has been ableist and inadequate.

But you didn’t wear a mask.

For whatever reason — you wanted to show off your makeup, it makes you itchy, you believed the messaging that COVID is endemic (what does that actually mean?), you just don’t think about it anymore — you made a choice that actively excludes people like me from participating not only in an event like a convention, but society at large. And yes, it is a choice. Every time you step out into the world without a mask on your face, you have made a decision that your very good reason, whatever it is, supersedes the right of disabled and at-risk people to exist safely in your orbit.

Well, hold on, you say. It’s not any one individual’s fault, it’s the inadequate public health messaging. Isn’t that what you’ve been saying?

And I have. In the past, I have talked about how it is unconscionable that health authorities have thrown their hands up and rescinded guidance that would have saved hundreds of thousands of lives and prolonged a pandemic that, to hear them tell it, has been bested. It hasn’t. Worst of all, the financial motivation that we all know is driving this premature victory lap isn’t even being fulfilled. Long COVID and other post-COVID complications are costing the global economy one trillion a year. Meanwhile, article after article handwrings about nobody wanting to work anymore, about the sagging college application scene, about declines in military enlistment, and the strain on our healthcare systems.

All of this is very much the fault of our leaders, who have decided the political ramifications of “normalcy” are more important than the health and lives of the 400 million people living with long COVID across the globe, the immunocompromised folks who are increasingly being shut out of every conceivable public space, and the disabled community which has been screaming into the wind about our marginalization since before the virus even hit US soil.

But I want to be very clear. You are helping them do this.

The reality is that we have been living in this deeply flawed landscape of “personal choice”, and you’ve made yours. You’ve opted not to look into how densely clustered cases are. You’ve stopped listening to your friends who have informed themselves. You’ve given yourself permission to put COVID on the back burner. You’ve earned it, right? Four and a half years of trauma?

COVID doesn’t care if you’re tired of being scared or careful or considerate. COVID is not something you can personally overcome by being smart or virtuous or brave. It is a virus which only seeks to infect and replicate, and it is getting very good at those things. While you’ve looked away, my community has been scrambling to avoid variants that skirt immunity and don’t show up on rapid tests until day five-seven. The constant battle has changed since you were last in it. It’s not sufficient anymore to get your shots and test before a big event. You could well be asymptomatic and infectious, or have symptoms and convinced yourself it can’t be COVID because that second line hasn’t popped up.

You have come to the conclusion sometime between 2022 and now that you just have to decide what level of risk you’re comfortable with and live with it. The problem with that is scale. It’s you and everybody else doing that, and a lot of people have decided they are comfortable with a high level of risk. Despite what you’ve been told, you’re not just making that decision for yourself. You are making it for every person you come in contact with.

Think back to the early tense days of 2020. We were told to select a “bubble.” Those people would be our social lifelines, and through those, we could control our exposure.

My bubble is quite small. It includes my husband, my sister, and two friends I see relatively frequently.

My husband goes to work via the bus, and to the grocery store. Every person he comes in contact with there has the potential to infect him, and then he has the potential to pass it along to me. He mitigates this by wearing a well-fitted respirator at all times.

My sister goes to work at a busy public place. She masks when public facing and takes it off in the back office. She goes to restaurants, bars, concerts, hangs out with friends and her own partner unmasked. About 75% of her interactions have the heightened potential to infect her, which she might then bring into my house when she visits me.

My friends do not mask anywhere except my house when asked. They attend concerts, shows, cons, bars.

Obviously, I am in control of whether I wear a mask around these people. And as we approach one million new cases a day, I will be around everyone but my husband. But science is clear: reciprocal masking is more effective at infection control than a single person masking — especially when that single person is trying to protect themselves, not others.

This is settled science. We’ve known this since 2020. It says clearly that the choice you make is not personal- it has implications for everyone you come in contact with.

And being clear — if I could, I’d make everyone wear a mask for their own health. I don’t want people suffering with what I have. But you’ve been told this lie that you can take your risks for yourself, so you feel comfortable going out without a mask. You’ve been told this lie that it’s possible to completely recover from a COVID infection, so you assume that even if you do catch it, that’s what’ll happen to you, despite evidence showing that every body is indelibly changed by an infection, and that risk only grows with each subsequent infection.

And the greatest lie of all — that only the sick or elderly have anything to fear from COVID — has given you unfounded confidence in your own “good” genes or immune system or fitness. You can get long COVID even if you’re in peak form — in fact, may even be more likely to be hit hard.

So you have decided, individually and collectively, that only the sick or elderly should have to take precautions, and you freewheel through life, only to get surprised and dismayed when you bump into COVID in the wild. It’s back, people declare every summer or winter, as though it ever left.

But I want you to really think about the implications of your choice. Besides yourself. Because let’s be honest here, that’s who you’ve been thinking about, right? Your risk. Your comfort. Never mind your bubble, never mind the bubble of everyone you come into contact with, never mind the people like me who are literally hiding from people like you.

You’re not masking at the doctor’s office. You’re not masking at the airport. You’re not masking at the giant superspreader you just attended, and you’re not masking in the bars and restaurants where we know the virus flourishes. And then you’re bringing that exposure back to your family and friends. Back to the grocery store, where you run across people like my husband, shopping for someone who is unsafe to leave the house, or your elderly neighbors, or an immunocompromised employee.

You’re a good person, or you like to think of yourself that way. That’s why when you’re asked to mask, you dismiss it out of hand — because that changed behavior implies that you’ve been doing something wrong.

And my friend, I’m telling this because I love you: you have been. You might have been doing that on faulty information, but be honest with yourself and with me — you’ve heard me begging people to take this seriously. You’ve seen the information I’ve been sharing. You have had the opportunity to seek out the correct information all along, and you have chosen not to.

It isn’t too late to change your view of the risk you’re imposing on the people around you. It’s not too late to push public health to become more effective. It’s not too late to act in solidarity and be the inclusive person you think you are. It’s not too late to take care of yourself.

Ultimately, that’s what I have been screaming myself hoarse about. I don’t want you to end up with what I have. I don’t want you to inadvertently impose that on someone else. And yes, I’ve been angry, because you’ve been advertising your absolute lack of concern with group shots of your naked faces on social media. It doesn’t seem to bother you that I am stuck at home like it’s 2020, except for doctors’ appointments that I literally have to risk my life to go to. You’ve told yourself that it’s not your problem, because only the sick and elderly have to take precautions.

You know better. You can do better. For your community, yourself, and me, do better.

Please. I love you.

Anna

PS. If you’re feeling upset and embarrassed right now, the best thing you can do is take action. Get yourself good masks (the surgicals and cloth ones don’t cut it anymore), donate to mask blocs so others can access good masks, write to your representatives and the President, comment on upcoming CDC guidance, schedule yourself a booster, and talk to your loved ones about doing better, too. The only way we get out of this is with community care. So care.

[feinyan]

DATING HEADCANONS featuring. satoru gojo, itadori yuji, megumi fushiguro and toge inumaki.

some random small dating headcanons involving the jujutsu kaisen boys. no tags, just fluff. enjoy.

gojo, who would sacrifice the world and everyone in it for you. who knows the dangers of letting himself be so vulnerable with someone, but can't help but want to offer everything to you. he would do anything for your smile, for the moments you give him which he treasures so closely to his heart. gojo, who cannot keep his hands off of you. who, to be frank, does not understand the concept of personal space. whos constantly finding an excuse to slide his arm around your shoulder, your waist, or to hold your hand. gojo, who spoils you!!! so so so much. who sees something thats hellishly expensive that you'd even slightly like and doesn't think twice before buying it. who brings you bags of goodies or expensive designer stuff he thinks you'd look just right in when returning from overseas missions. gojo, who to no surprise, loves to tease to get reactions out of you. who doesn't know how to quit it. he's just so fond of your flustered face, or the way you stare at him with pouty eyes after he says something that makes your heart race. gojo, who loves to switch up the nicknames he uses on you. who calls you princess when you're pouty, or calls you ma'am when you're upset. who in a whiny, dragged out tone says "babyyyyy," when you say no to something stupid he suggests.

itadori, who is the most respectful, sweetest boy ever. it doesn't come as a surprise, but hes soooo polite with everything he does. he holds doors open for you, walks on the close-to-road part of the sidewalk when you walk together, holds your bags for you, or buttons up your jackets. small, yes, but meaningful things. itadori, who loves to take pictures of you!!! who is constantly changing his lockscreen to different photos of you, because ohhh, you're so cute and you look good in everything! he can't decide what to stick with. itadori, who is sooooo gentle with you. who knows he could hurt you on accident, and dies a little at the thought of that. he treats you with so much care, his touch is so gentle regardless of if its in the way he holds you or kisses you. or does anything really. itadori, who gives you his first for everything. who wants to be yours for his lifetime, and experience everything he possibly can with you. despite knowing the dangers he could be to you, and knowing that wanting you forever is selfish, but he can't help himself when you mean just about everything to him. itadori, who cannot hide things for the life of him. who buys you a cute gift for an upcoming special occasion, and immediately blurts it out that he got you it the moment he sees you. or who gets told something thats a secret by someone else, and says "okay, don't tell them i told you, 'kay? but,"

megumi, who tries soooo hard to impress you. who puts more effort into his training, or offers to do something he usually wouldn't when you're around. he's not even sure if he notices the change himself, but his classmates like yuji and nobara sure do! megumi, who is constantly glued to your side. unintentionally following you around, or offering to hold your things or walk you places just so he has the opportunity to be with you just a little longer. megumi, who not so secretly adores the attention you give him. who grumbles about your touch, or constant hand holding, but if you're not clinging onto him he'll complain, "it's cold today. my hands are freezing," even in the scorching hot. who pretends to not listen to your babbling in his ears, but proves you wrong by bringing up something you'd mentioned you like even briefly in a conversation weeks later. megumi, who lends you his clothing and can't help but stare. if it's cold, he'll slide his jacket over your shoulders and a scarf around your neck. sure, maybe he's freezing his ass off, but he can handle it if it means seeing you happy. megumi, who doesn't understand why you want him. but he understands fully why he wants you. who pictures you as someone made for him, who can't get every little interaction you two share out of his head. who denied his feelings for so long yet came to accept them. he knows he wants to be someone you're able to rely on, or can turn to when you want to feel safe. he would give you everything and try his hardest for you, even if he'd never admit it.

inumaki, who sends you little screenshots from his games that remind you of him. who see's a cute, whimsical little creature in a game and thinks 'cute. i should show this to s/o' inumaki, who has his phone on him constantly so he can text you. who is constantly sending you messages, or finding excuses to talk to you, and is surprisingly good at communication for someone that's unable to properly speak. inumaki, who makes up for your lack of verbal communication with displays of affection. who simply enjoys your presence more than anything. who stands closest to you no matter what you're doing, holds your hands all the time or follows you around. inumaki, who despite not being able to speak in anything other than ingredients, is a d1 yapper. looooves to text you silly shit, and yeah .. he plays a lot of online games, so sometimes he'll accidentally treat you like a homie instead of a s/o. whoopsie!! but its never serious. who drags you into his pranks, but always has to deal with the consequences himself :( inumaki, who wants to share his hobbies and interests with you. watching mukbang together, inviting you to play games even if you have no idea what you're doing. he loves to tease if you're not very good, or 'accidentally' make you lose if you're winning against him. accidental "drop the controller" slips from his lips, but hey, maybe if he's feeling nice he'll offer a win out of pity.

@ feinyan

[botanyshitposts]

ok INCREDIBLY old content originally meant for this blog but in 2018 when i was just a wee lad with a little spinner propeller hat and big rainbow lollipop i went to a carnivorous plant convention in california and met a bunch of people who breed/collect/study these guys. one person was this collector who was slowly working on leaving the hobby or at least no longer growing plants, and he had a bunch of carnivorous plant related files he was charging like 50 cents for or something, and so i came into possession of these, which are examples of the kind of paperwork you have to have done to legally ship/trade endangered species of both plants and animals. functionally very boring paperwork, but something i found like, incredibly fascinating. i blacked out the personal id of the person and then immediately forgot to ever upload them, lmao.

these plants were bred and raised in a greenhouse and sold abroad, not taken from the wild, but because the species are endangered and often protected in their native countries (most of these are nepenthes, asian pitcher plants, a huge family spread throughout oceania and southeast asia), there's a lot more documentation that needs to be done regardless of their origin, both on the end of the seller and on the end of the buyer.

the rabbit hole on carnivorous plant trade is deep and kind of wild. there's plenty of common, non-threatened, greenhouse-grown pitcher plants on the market that people buy all the time, even non-collectors, but there's a whole debate to be had on if it's morally okay to be collecting the more endangered/rare of these plants in the first place. the big argument for breeding is that breeding them in captivity means there's more supply that's not poached from the wild, meaning poachers have less of an incentive to take the risk of taking adult plants from their habitats; from what i've heard, sometimes countries will issue permits for breeders to collect some wild seeds just to create a non-wild breeding pool to drive down the price. predictably, however, you also get people who are very much willing to pay a lot of money to get as rare of a plant as possible.

anyone familiar with the allure valuable plants have had over people throughout history can imagine the rest, but here's an article about a guy who started buying poached plants to enrich his private nepenthes collection, who then got busted by a fish and wildlife service agent embedded in his carvirorous plant circle. the plants this guy was buying were being sold to him without any CITES paperwork or declarations like the ones above; it was literally just a guy in indonesia taking rare plants from the woods around where he lived, selling them over facebook marketplace and ebay, and mailing them overseas as an undeclared 'gift' to get around customs. frighteningly small steps to take on all sides, to be honest.

(also, fun fact: another example of carnivorous plants that get poached are wild venus fly traps, which are only native to north and south carolina in the US. from what i understand it's a mix of people who genuinely did not know it's a native species and people who really are just going out into the woods and digging up plants to sell online. sometimes poaching is closer to home than you'd think!)

anyway. wild and interesting times in the land of plants recovered from a hard drive lmao

[auxryn]

Been thinkin' about this lil guy:

In terms of participating in electoralism.

I voted for Kamala Harris and Tim Walz by absentee ballot. In fact, I voted straight ticket Democrat. I even voted for Tammy Baldwin, who co-sponsored KOSA (along with about 70 other senators).

I can only vote in federal races because I am a permanent overseas resident.

So I have been thinking about if you can vote for something without supporting or endorsing it. Seems a bit difficult, but I think it's possible. Congresspersons are experts in voting and they do it all the time.

Your vote is a tool available to you.

The election of Donald Trump will hasten the downfall of the US empire (good) but will commit crimes against humanity targeting racial and sexual minorities (very bad). They have openly talked about mass deportation. Once genocide begins, it can only be stopped by armed force. The world has shown time and time again that it isn't willing to intervene.

The election of Kamala Harris will preserve and possibly strengthen the US empire (bad) but will preserve and repair democracy and the rule of law in the US (good). It will repudiate fascism in our time. It is a chance to cast all the most toxic and insane authoritarians of our generation into obscurity.

That would start a political realignment which COULD allow a leftist party, or at least a substantial leftist caucus, to emerge.

The fact is that I don't fuck with accelerationism. I cast my vote for Harris. If you can safely vote, you should.

But I don't really support her. I can't remain a liberal anymore. I have been dragged into becoming a leftist.

Voting is just one political behavior. I could donate money to a campaign. There are several actually progressive Democrats who could use the support. Phone banking, writing postcards, canvassing, and voter registration drives are all good, though it's hard to do those from abroad.

Elections are not everything. Protests, including direct actions and embracing a diversity of tactics, is probably the best bang for your volunteer buck. Though as an immigrant in my current country it's best not to get arrested.

It's hard to support a cause and know that it is good. Easy to believe, but hard to know. There are roughly two people in my community who appear to be unhoused. I see them most weeks when I eat lunch while my kid does his special education class. So I buy some extra food and if I see them I give it to them. They say thank you. I hope to learn their names. I think that this is good.

The world is fucked and I can't fix it. I can't do much. But I can do a little. And to do anything I have to participate.

[thedivineden]

Purrfect

pairing: Shota Aizawa x Hybrid!Cat

genre: Fluff x Smut

words: 3k+

notes: coworkers, hybrid cat, car sex, choking, blood, biting, breeding, exhibitionism, voyeurism

Hybrids are a normal sight in U.A, there is nothing in particular that sets any of them apart. Except you, a new hire from overseas. The day you arrived, Hizashi was forcing Shota to the library, he knew for a fact once Shoto laid his eyes on you he’d be hooked.

Boy was he right.

You were a vision of perfection from head to toe. You were sitting with your legs crossed with your tail flicking behind you. Your excitement made his hands sweat and his ears hot. Your jewelry intensifying your already obvious beauty. You were sitting with your legs crossed with your tail flicking behind you.

He especially loved your black pointed ears adorned with silver and gold. When you stood up to greet the two men, Shota could hardly keep from reaching out to stroke your ears.

Hizashi was being his usual bubbly self, asking you questions about your quirk and what you used to do before coming a teacher at U.A. but Shoto couldn’t even muster up the courage to say hello. He hid behind his scarf trying to contain his face from turning red. “SHOTA MY MAN! WHY ARE YOU SO QUIET?!” Hizashi had knew what effect this would have on his poor friend and he was loving every minute of it.

“Hello, Welcome to U.A. hopefully you can be a competent addition to our team” Shota has regretted that statement since that day he’s met you. He noticed the grimace spread across your face morph into a half smile. Sweetly you responded “Nice to meet you gentlemen but I should really get back to work.” Making your way through the two men, especially Shota couldn’t help but watch you tail swish behind you accentuating your curvy figure.

After that day Shota didn’t see you for a week he would find himself walking past your office everyday. It wasn’t until his interest was subsiding did he see you in his classroom — his whole body felt like it was on fire, his eyes scanned your whole body starting at his favorite part. Your ears. The way they flicked while you read the roaster for the class calling his students out one by one made the front of his pants tight.

The rest of your body is just as perfect from your silky brown skin to your coily hair framing your adorable round face. Everything about you is intoxicating and Shota wants a taste. He finally musters to walk in the class to be greeted by the students but most importantly you. “Good Morning Mr.Aizawa, Principle Nezu assigned me to the wrong class. I ended up being placed with Mr. Hiro but I couldn’t understand a word he was saying.” You ended your statement with a small giggle which made Shota fall for you harder. Why did you have to be so damn cute.

Shota didn’t realize how much silenced until your friendly demeanor turned into a reserved one. Quickly getting himself together he laughs sharply at your response causing you to jump, some of the students to puzzled looks and some to giggle. You laugh nervously stepping out of his way allowing him to walk past you and sit at his desk. For the remainder of the day you were practically glued by his side, your proximity made him squirm. He couldn’t even focus on his students because whenever he heard you laugh or instruct one of them his eyes were glued on you.

However, once the students went to lunch you brought a chair right next to his desk and proceeded to bring out two bento boxes. “I made too much this morning and brought two. “Don’t mind the dog shaped rice ball I thought I was going to be with Mr.Hiro today” opening the bento box Shota couldn’t help but laugh at the awkwardly shaped rice balls. “Heyyy! What’s funny? I worked really hard on those!”

He placed a hand on your thigh giving it a gentle squeeze attempting to reassure you.

“I assure you these rice balls are perfect just like you.” He took note of the way your ears flattened and your tail wrap around you. Removing his hand he grabs the chopsticks inside of the box picking up the rice ball giving you a soft smile. During the entire lunch hour you and Shota sat in silence except for the praises he would give you on the various items you packed in the lunch box.

The next few weeks went the same, you would bring a chair over to his desk and give him a bento box full of food. Except, you two started talking more and the more Shota learned about you, the more he wished you were his. He started to notice the way your ears would flick and your tail would swish in his presence but remain content with everyone else. He makes you nervous and he plans to use that to his advantage.

“Miss? Can I bother you for a moment” there’s no way in the world that Shota could bother you and you were trying your hardest to make sure you didn’t tell him that. “Yes Mr. Aizawa? What can I assist you with?” He didn’t say another word before taking out a medium velvet box and opening it to reveal a necklace adorned diamonds along the collar with a diamond bell shining on the end.

Your heart tightened seeing the gorgeous item “It’s beautiful, Whoever this is for is very lucky!” your heart twinges. You thought over the past couple of weeks you and him were getting close. He could see your ears hang low and your tail wrap around you. “It’s for you.” he said this without looking you in the eye grabbing the chain. Shota stand up and comes close to you, unlatching the clasp and instructs you to turn around.

Obeying his command you feel him lean over you to wrap the piece of jewelry around your neck clasping it. His smell is overpowering and his proximity makes you dizzy. His hands move from the back of your neck caressing your shoulders gently. Finally making their way to your arms placing you in a firm grip. A small yelp emerges from you which pleases Shota — he brings you closer now wrapping his toned arms around you. His breath on your neck flusters you and makes your skin hot.

Closing your eyes in anticipation you ears start to flick, not only at Shota and the compromising situation you’re in but you can now also hear someone coming down the hall. Frantic you whisper to him “Shota! Shota! I think someone is coming!” Attempting to wiggle out his grasp only for him to grip you harder. He plants soft kisses where the jewelry is shining on your neck — the adrenaline and his kisses are making you weak and lightheaded.

“Try to relax darling” the sultry tone in is voice sent shivers up up your body making your tail fluff up. His teeth graze the side of your neck making your eyes close in anticipation. You can feel his lips change shape and his tongue trail up and down your neck. Nibbling each time attempting to savor this moment. Once he heard the bell Shota put a considerable distance between you two.

Not even a minute later his star student is opening the door instructing everyone to sit down. It felt like eyes were on you as you tried to defluff your tail. The remainder of the day you kept your distance from Shota and this pissed him off. You excused yourself to the bathroom ten minutes after the kids got back from lunch and haven’t been seen since.

Shota even sent a handful of his students to retrieve you from the restroom but each one came back with the same results. “She’s not in there Mr.Aizawa” he was beyond confused. Shota kept an eye out for you all day only when the day ended is when he saw you. There you were standing in front of the window of the teachers lounge, ears down, twisting and turning the bell adorned on your neck.

The sunset reflecting off of you made you look angelic. Shota couldn’t help but admire the slight crease that appears on your forehead every time the bell jingles. He adored looking at you and even when you were doing nothing, you found a way to be breathtaking.

You can feel a hand on the small of your back causing you to turn around and once again you’re in a enclosed space with your coworker. His other hand caresses the side of your face, using his fingers to tilt your head up. “I apologize. I never want to be the cause of your agitation.”

Staring into each other eyes makes your furrow increase and your cheeks burn. It felt like you were under his spell as his tired eyes bore into yours. He makes you shrink while also making you feel seen. “ I accept your apology but don’t you think this is a little inappropriate?” without batting an eye he replied with a firm no.

“Shota I’m not entirely sure what you want from me.” He didn’t say anything just held you in place, slowly closing the distance between you two. Carelessly you let him do it closing your eyes, your mind was racing you could only focus on the way he pulled you in. “Will you let me take you out?”

Opening your eyes you could see a slight tint on his cheeks. Surprisingly, enough you weren’t the only one that is nervous. “I would be delighted to go out with you Shota.” Leaning over slight he places a kiss on your cheek finally giving you your space. “We’re leaving together Friday. Don’t worry about going home, you look good in everything.”

He left without another word leaving you alone with your thoughts again. For the remainder of the week you two continued on as normal. As normal as two coworkers who spend their lunch tucked away in a classroom playing footsies and eating the lunch you each prepared for one another.

Even due to unforeseen circumstances you two managed to keep your distance until Friday. You made yourself scarce that day, attending meetings with principal and going around to assist other instructors. It wasn’t until the final bell rang and the halls were empty is when Shota finally laid his eyes on you.

There you were standing next to that window —instead of seeing agitation across your face, he could see anxiety and excitement bubbling up inside you. Shota didn’t even think about changing but wish he had once he laid his eyes on you. His eyes trailing up you body starting at the slender black heels you have on.

When eyeing your legs he couldn’t help but notice how soft and supple they look, he fantasizes about laying on them, massaging, and being buried in between them. Your pencil black skirt stops at your mid thigh which you meticulously paired with a silky dark green blouse. You were holding your tail delicately running your fingers through it. Everything about you made his body hot and his dick twitch.

What he wouldn’t give to run his fingers your tail and knead your ears until you purr for him. Once he stepped into the lounge your ears perk up making your head his way. “Good evening Shota, sorry I wasn’t there to exchange lunch with you!”

“It’s fine kitten! Let’s go, we’re going to be late for our showing” putting a hand on the small of you back he leads you all the way to his car door. For weeks you gushed to Shota about your love for black and white films and drive-in movies. He distinctly remembered the films you talked about the most, how you always wanted have a date there but never had the times because of school.

That’s when he realized what he loved about you the most. Watching you talk about something you love is like watching the sun come up. You were so excited telling him about the variety of films they had and how you’d always end up knowing how it ends. The entire time he observed you and your mannerism — the way your pupils expand and your ears flick, the sight of your tail feverishly swinging behind you. That’s why he wanted to do this for you, to see you like that because of him, to see how much he yearns for you.

The car ride there felt like you two were in the classroom again. Instead of footsies, Shota kept his hand on your thigh the entire ride and always giving in a squeeze whenever you two stopped. It wasn’t until you two arrived at Musutafu Park. Shota found a secluded corner near the screen so you be unseen by others and still be able to see the movie. “Let’s move to the backseat.”

Being the practical man he is, Shota opens his door to get out until he felt leg bump into his arm. Turning to look at you he gets a eyeful of your butt and a smack to the face with your tail as you climb in the backseat. He didn’t hesitate to close his door back and climb to the back with you. Shota made sure to prepare everything almost a replication of how you described it.

He had place blockers in the back windows so no one can see you two, snacks for you and him, and blankets draping the backseat. You didn’t say anything at first just silently admiring his effort and that’s when you see it. Tucked into the backs of candy is a flyer for a black and white movie showing ‘The Fated Lovers’. Scooting close to him you while stating “This is so sweet Shota! It’s perfect and they’re playing my favorite movie!”

He wouldn’t tell you that he paid the teen at the ticket booth to play your favorite. Instinctively he wraps his arm around you closing the distance between you two. Throughout the movie you two shared laughs towards the film and as usual Shota is asking questions about you. He wants to know everything about you down to the last minuscule detail.

You two got so lost in each other that you didn’t realize what scene is playing until you hear the sound of a woman moan. Turning your attention to the screen watching the escapade unfold. You watch as the two people fight for dominance with their mouths while ripping off each others clothes.

Shota is watching you like a hawk — he’s watching the way your ears flick and go low, he notices how your rapid tail movement slows down, and lastly he could feel how hot your body is. Your body is so reactive and it’s making it harder not to bend you over the console and fuck you.

He didn’t want to impose on you more than he already has. The feeling of your warm hand travel up his thigh shocks Shota in place. You stop short at the base of his cock squeezing the most inner part of his thigh. He jumps on you after this — entrapping you under him you can feel his hand roaming all over, he places a kiss on your supple lips before lightly sucking the bottoms of your lip.

Shota wants your consent verbally and non verbally. He wants to hear you give yourself to him while your body shows how much you want him. His kisses makes you feel juvenile, Shota is gentle but passionate. You two fight for dominance with your tongues — sucking, biting, and licking one another in between kisses.

Shota sees you’re ears rapidly flicking and he took the opportunity to knead them. You purr under him immediately making the bulge in his pants stiffen. Removing his lips and hands from you — he sits up looking straight at you he says, “Am I allowed to have you?” and without another word you sit up with him taking off your shirt and skirt.

“I want to hear you say it doll, say that I can have you”

You’ve never felt so exposed and seen at the same time. He stares at you with low eyes, admiring every part of you. “You can have me Shota, all of me..” He gently laid you back hovering over you once more. His hands knead at your sides as he leans towards your neck. Kissing and sucking Shota leaves a trail of saliva down your neck to your cushy v-line.

He didn’t waste anytime putting his hands under your knees pushing your legs out and forward to give him a full view of your soaking cunt. “It’s beautiful love.” He didn’t hesitate to bring his face close and drag his tongue through your folds. Between his stubble and his eagerness to devour you everything about him makes your core throb with excitement.

His tongue is precise and slow, everything he does makes your clit throb. You can feel the rough pads of his fingers touch your lip. His eyes are looking up at you like he’s commanding you with his gaze. Opening your mouth his rough pads slide past your lips massaging his finger with your saliva. Removing his slick coated fingers from your mouth, Shota tease your hole before slowly sliding one finger inside then another.

Your hips buck and tail fluffs at the insertion — Shota is watching your body closely, sucking and fingering your cunt just the way you like. You didn’t know what to focus on. His fingers made your cunt tighten and your heat build up. “Shota, please- go faster” he hummed in response gradually picking up pace. His tongue became more calculated in its movement and his fingers curled and pumped feverishly.

Your tail snapped around his neck pushing his face closer. The soft feeling of your fur on his neck made him moan into your heat causing you to release on his face. You jump up pushing Shota back — he couldn’t get a word in when hurriedly release his cock from his pants freeing his erection. You stare in awe at his long shaft, taking note of the significant girth he has. You can hear him clear his throat looking up at him you see the blush across his face “Did anyone ever tell you it’s rude to stare?

“I didn’t count you as the shy type Mr.Aizawa, Do I make you nervous?” You smile make his dick jump, hell everything about you makes his mind, heart, and dick throb. He doesn’t even realize he’s saying something before “You’re perfect” falls put of his mouth. Your eyes light up and before he can say anything else, your mouth is on his tip, swirling your tongue around the angry mushroom. Pretty moans from the man bless your ears and making your cunt throb.

He could barely keep his eyes open as you envelope your tongue around his shaft. His voice is low and whiny “You’re-you’re doing so great” — you hum in response the vibrations makes Shota buck his hips up. For a moment you choke taking everything in at once. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry! I couldn’t-“ you hum in response refusing to come up for air.

Your speed picks up, you can feel his legs shake and saliva coat your chin. He could see your hand wipe your chin and grasp his scrotum. The sensation of you deepthroating and massaging his testis is overwhelming. You hear him whimper, plea, and moan out for you. “Please kitten~ don’t stop.”

You can feel his member throb before he releases in your mouth. You don’t hesitate to swallow his nut coming face to face with him “Want to know how you taste?” Nodding his head up and down you use your tail to bring him close kissing him passionately. “I like the way you taste Shota, can I taste more of you” your eyes are full of lust he nods in agreement.

You climb on top of him coming close to his collar. He feels your tongue slide along his collarbone and up his neck. Opening your mouth you bite the side of his neck making sure to break the top layer of skin. Shota winces at the pain feeling his body swelter. “You taste so sweet. Let me make you feel good” you line your cunt to his tip and slowly descend on dick. You were teasing him now, you would start with his tip, and slowly slid to the middle of his shaft and bounce.

Shota could only take so much, your cunt was warm and soaking — he wanted nothing more than to slam into you and fuck you until his dick is numb. This is true bliss. All it took was for you to slam down fully taking him in for Shota to launch forward.

He wraps his arms around you to keep you in place, he looks up at you and smiles. “You’re being naughty now. Let me take over” you can feel his hips move achingly slow, he wants to savor this moment with you. “Shota~ faster..please” he wants to remember the feeling of you, how you smell, how you cunt feels convulsing around his member.

When picking up the pace he can feel you tightening around him. Wrapping your legs around him you’re able to match his rhythm. Your forehead meet his then your lips. Only the muffled sounds of moans and whimpers can be heard from you both. You two are ravaging each other and the smell of sex heavy in the air. He can feel your long nails dig into his back and your legs tighten around him.

“Be a good kitten for me, don’t bit me too hard” you can feel his rough hands grip your tail and pull it. You bite his bottom lip in response squirting on his lap. This doesn’t slow his pace, Shota continues to bully your cunt, hitting that sweet spot over, and over, and over. “Shotaaa~ I can’t- I can’t-“ letting go of your tail he places his hand on your neck holding you in place while he fucks you. The sound of the bell on your neck pushes him further.

His eyes never leave yours, you can see his resolve crumbling and his release approaching. Your moans were stifled but loud. He groans as he releases inside of you still keeping you close and your neck in place. “I’m sorry I didn’t mean to be rough with you” he lets go of you noticing a large smile appear on your face. “I didn’t think you had it in you eraser head”

Even as you were getting dressed he is mesmerized. He could watch you all night and never get tired of you. “Aw we missed the movie.” even your pout is cute. He chuckles at your statement, putting his hand on your cheek he leans in and kisses you passionately. “I can bribe the kid at the front to play it again, just for us.” He didn’t even have to wait for your reply because your rapid tail movement said it all.

“Yes please!”

[whatifyoulivelikethat]

yes or no?, m | jjk

pairing(s): jungkook x reader, slight yoongi x reader

summary: Jeon Jungkook is distraught to know he can't jack off. After all, he spent all that money to complete his tattoo sleeve. He wasn't about to ruin all that hard work just for a quick nut. But it's going to take a while to heal. Days – no, weeks! – with no masturbating. Waaah! Why did he pick his right arm?! Thankfully, noona to the rescue... right? RIGHT?!

warnings: rated M (18+) for language; slight crack b/c JK's POV; JK is whipped, welp; smut (fem reader, minor D/s dynamics, sexual fantasies, heavy petting / teasing, cock-and-ball torture, finger sucking, spit kink, handjob / m-masturbation, edging / orgasm denial, hair-pulling kink, nipple play, m-receiving oral, multiple orgasms, mentioned forearm kink); noona!reader; pleasure is JK-focused and JK's POV

'magic-8' ball noona is back! no need to read, just know there's a yoongi x reader x jk sex triangle and they're roommates :D

--

Jeon Jungkook was in pain, horny, and depressed.

On the plus side, his tattoo sleeve was almost completed!

Woohoo!

Sigh, no, he still felt like throwing himself into a wall and sliding down to become an unmoving puddle of goo. So tired. He always felt like this after the adrenaline of a long tattoo session. Session days were fun while he was in the studio hanging out with the tattoo artist, even for hours on end. He had brought his own snacks, plenty of water, and pain medication. The artist had even brought lunch for him – probably because Jungkook was spending a LOT of money covering up some old tattoos he ragretted regretted, but hey! Free food! Jungkook was always happy to receive free meat!

Wait. That sound weird.

Eh.

Anyway.

He sighed as he fumbled with his keys, trying to use his left hand as much as possible. Today, the artist had worked on his right forearm and filling in his elbow with black. The skin there was irritated and covered in plastic, which made it annoying to do common tasks he noticed. Great. Another day of not getting off. Yeah, Jungkook loved getting tattoos but it made him grumpy that he couldn’t just jerk off whenever he wanted.

What?!

It was a legitimate reason to be grumpy, dammit.

Why did Jungkook pick his right arm for his tattoo sleeve? Simple. He had no foresight and tattoos were permanent. Whoops. (He was not an idiot. Trust.) He finally got the key into the lock and turned it. His life wouldn’t be so hard (keke) if it wasn’t for his current living arrangements. To be clear, he really did love living in Kim Seokjin’s house full of his friends. There was just one problem. One very sexy problem.

He opened the door cautiously, wondering if he would hear moaning today.

Silence.

Whew.

The house smelled really good though. Like food. Mmmm. Food. Jungkook wandered in, loosely holding onto the strap of his large black bag and stepping out of his shoes, neatly settling them into their spot… to avoid getting scolded later. He was a good boy.

Sometimes.

The current residents of the home were: Kim Seokjin, the owner of the house, actor, and professional whaler in too many games; Kim Taehyung, a fashion model and close friend that had taken over Park Jimin’s spot after Jimin had moved out to work overseas for a while; Min Yoongi, a music producer and quite possibly sex on legs (Taehyung’s words, one had to be there for it to be funny); and the Magic-8 ball noona. The only girl. Also, she was, erm, part of a consensual sex triangle that Jungkook was a member of but he definitely didn’t start it.

Really…!

Anyway.

She had a real name but Jungkook was always going to remember that cursed hunk of plastic denying him twenty-six times. Besides, it was just easier to refer to her as noona since she was the one female and older than him. It was proper and polite. She was only by name when he was on his knees and begging to cum.

Cough.

Anyway!

He made his way into the kitchen carefully. It wasn’t unusual for the house to be fairly quiet as it was quite common for the introverts to split up and occupy themselves with their respective hobbies, especially when Taehyung went out with his friends. Jungkook vaguely remembered Taehyung saying he was going to a sauna with his squad or something like that. Seokjin was probably playing MapleStory in the master bedroom with his headphones on. Something about a new update. He wasn’t coming out unless to eat and even that would be rare. Yoongi and noona… well, they were either fucking or holed up in their respective rooms being creative.

Oh.

Yeah, did he mention the other part of this sex triangle was his sharp-witted, cat-eyed, resting-bitch-face-but-secretly-a-tsundere hyung? And the first place Jungkook witnessed Yoongi and her having sex was the kitchen he was about to walk into? His dick twitched every time he entered the kitchen because of it. He both felt guilty and became aroused by the wrongness of it. Then got more turned on when he remembered that he couldn’t masturbate tonight. Maybe he should just touch himself with his left hand to relieve some pressure. Or make it worse. On purpose.

Ugh, maybe he really was a masochist.

Jungkook rounded the corner and yelped when found himself cornered by his hyung and his noona glaring at him.

“Wah!”

“Oh, look who decided to show up,” his grumpy hyung grumbled.

“There you are,” his mischievous noona mused, waving about a ladle like it was a magic wand. “Sit down, sit down. You must be hungry after a long day.”

“Why didn’t you text? We ended up having dinner without you, hah,” Yoongi hmphed, poking Jungkook in the chest. The older male looked tired and overworked. One glance between the glowing, calm smile to Yoongi’s messy black hair sticking up in every direction. It was pretty clear what went down. RIP, hyung. His hyung was wearing an elegant black silk pajama shirt and matching pants with the waistband slightly askew. Red mark on the fair skin of his exposed collarbone.

Here? Or in her bed? Or in his bed? Or… mine so it smells just like them?

It was an irrelevant thought, as Jungkook rarely slept in his own bed despite having one. He had a bad habit unique quirk of falling asleep wherever he was, whenever he felt the need to sleep. This greatly annoyed Seokjin and made Taehyung laugh. Sometimes Jungkook would wake up with the latter guy sleeping on top of him like a handsome sloth. Just Taehyung things. But most times, Jungkook was in his noona’s bed.

Hey! It was a comfy bed.

Ahem.

Jungkook received another sharp poke and he jumped, stumbling as he was pushed to the kitchen island, extra startled as Yoongi wordlessly pulled out the seat for him. He got a what? look in response, complete with black strands falling over those narrowed dark brown eyes.

“Don’t you have to be careful about your arm, especially the first night?” Yoongi puffed. “Don’t get used to it.”

“O-Oh… yeah… t-thanks, hyung.”

Yoongi pretended not to hear and scooted himself towards the stove. She was standing next to a pot on low heat looking remarkably put together in red plaid pajamas. Jungkook plopped his butt onto the tall chair and put his bag on the other, yanking off his beanie. Ruffled his hair quickly to avoid his short black hair looking flat and dumb. He pretended like he wasn’t checking out the way her juicy butt completely filled out the pants and the way they clung to her lush hips. He pretended he didn’t notice that the top was relatively cropped and he could clearly see her amazing waist to ass ratio. He definitely didn’t say anything about how nice it was to see the beautiful curve of her neck due to the cute sheep-shaped claw clip collecting her hair back. And he surely didn’t go completely breathless when she turned around with a steaming bowl, suddenly realizing her pajama shirt was held together by only a single button in the center and she clearly wasn’t wearing a bra. There was a row of buttons; she just hadn’t done them up.

Fuck.

It was violently unfair that she was allowed to look this hot in normal clothes.

She leaned over the counter and placed the bowl in front of him. He could see down her shirt. Damn. Even through the flannel fabric, Jungkook could still see the peaks of her nipples if he really stared. Really, really stared. For maybe ten seconds.

He jumped at the clink of a metal spoon against ceramic.

“You should eat,” she said with an enigmatic smile. Gracefully balanced her chin on the back of her knuckles, her fingers fanned downwards, her elbows resting on the counter to look into his eyes.

Shit, he was smooth melting like butter under that hot gaze.

“Pick your jaw off the floor,” said a gruff voice in Daegu satoori.

Jungkook jolted as crabby Yoongi appeared seemingly out of nowhere – well, he was here the whole time, oop – and cocked an eyebrow at him. Now the older two were both standing side by side, observing him expectantly. It was only then that Jungkook looked down and realized what was in front of him.

“Wait… it’s not my birthday.”

She chuckled. Her eyes sparkled with mirth. Ugh, he loved seeing them directed at him. “Seaweed soup will be good after a long tattoo day. You need nutrients. You need energy. Plus, Yoongi added beef in there for you. There’s some rice too, but not too much because Yoongi said you don’t like having too many carbs before sleeping. More meat, as you like it,” she concluded, using the spoon to show him all the ingredients. “We made it for you. Eat.”

She smiled exactly how the Cheshire cat would grin. He glanced at Yoongi who was staring at his fingernails like they were the most interesting thing in the world. They stood close to each other. No mistaking their closeness. The worst (best?) part was that even though Jungkook knew exactly what had happened while he was gone all those hours, he didn’t find this scene offensive.

In fact, he felt a bit teary from their consideration.

“T-Thanks…”

He took the spoon from her, his inhale hitching as his fingertips brushed against hers. Oh, her hands. Those lovely hands. His gaze shifted up, his heart beating fast. The side of her lips tugged upwards.

A smile turned smirk.

His cock twitched as Jungkook remembered her smirking face grinning up at him with his cum drenched all over her tongue. The last time he had jacked off into her mouth.

Argh!

He had used his left hand, mostly because he wasn’t sure if he was supposed to do the repeated motion of bending his right arm and bringing the utensil to his mouth right now. Hmmmm. He scrunched up his face and wrinkled his nose. It probably wouldn’t be the best idea. He didn’t want to mess up the line work and all that nice color shading. He was already doing the cover ups, after all. Plus, it did hurt a little moving too much. He would just see how far he could get. It was pretty easy since it was soup and the pieces of beef were cut pretty small.

They must have thought of that.

Jungkook tried not to cry grateful tears into his seaweed soup as he heard his hyung and noona busy themselves with cleaning the kitchen, ‘cause that would be utterly embarrassing and not very manly, sniff.

Thankfully, he was saved by his rising boner.

The thing was, Jungkook was pretty sure he wasn’t turned on by pain. Ahem. Okay, maybe a little (lotta) bit. But, time and place! This was precisely why he picked a very cool and very talented male tattoo artist. He could ask questions and be noisy and immature and not feel bad. Jungkook liked female artists but he would get too mentally distracted because he didn’t really know what to talk about, so his mind would end up wandering to another set of hands and then, bam! A not useful boner. Also, he didn’t want to creep anybody out or make them uncomfortable. That would be mean.

But, uh.

Jungkook was beginning to realize he enjoyed and hated these long sessions. He enjoyed them because he very much considered his tattoo artist his friend. He enjoyed them because his close friends were supportive, bought him snacks, and told him he was cool or brave for getting so many tattoos (very important, yup). And, yeah, he liked the repeated stabbing (it was addictive, okay?!). But he also enjoyed them because of how attentive his noona was before and during the aftercare process. She helped him prepare his bag prior to the appointment, would make sure to remind him to keep the area hydrated, make him his favorite meals (meat!), and be the first to help him in case he needed it. As for the hate part…

Ugh, it made him so fucking horny knowing he couldn’t get off without her help.

Yeah, sure, he could use his left hand. But the nut would be pisslow awful and not at all satisfying. Of course, Jungkook could wait and use his right when he felt like it was fine but that wouldn’t be for a while. He didn’t spend all that money to have to explain that he wanted a touch-up because he needed to cum being around a literal sex goddess his noona (not to mention what a mortifying thing to say to his poor tattoo artist that didn’t need to know all that). And there was no way in hell Jungkook was going to avoid his noona during his recovery. She had just made him seaweed soup! Oh, yeah, and Yoongi was there too. Anyway, the forced waiting turned him on even more than usual because there was a real reason behind it. After his first long session, he even clumsily edged himself with his left hand, multiple times, before he asked her to get him off, just so it felt even better when her lips closed around his leaking, desperate cock.

Jungkook choked on some beef.

“Are you okay?”

“I’m – ack! ��� fine. Totally fine!” he managed to hack out in a very not-fine tone.

“You look like you’re choking,” Yoongi commented matter-of-factly, eerily similar to a narrator of a nature documentary.

“Be careful,” she laughed, coming around the counter to rub his back. Aaaah! Jungkook lifted his right arm slightly and tried to subtly punch his dick down into submission but, as it turned out, his erection was as stubborn as he was. Awesome. Not to mention space was very limited under the counter. Shit. She patted in between his shoulder blades. “Want some water?”

“No, hah, I’m f-fine,” he wheezed, freezing up a little at her touch. He thought he was used to it by now but he really wasn’t, especially when his dick was already halfway up the stairs to heaven. Down to hell to the circle of lust? Whatever. She wasn’t too close, as she was on his right side, but he had enough memories to know how skin-to skin felt, enough times of her breasts pressed to his back and her hands exploring his chest, enough moments of her agile fingers splayed out over his pecs like blooming flowers, running her nails over his skin, flicking his nipples, all the while tracing her tongue along the base of his neck with her hard nipples rubbing against his shivering back…

Okay.

Jungkook was not fine.

“It’s kinda warm…” he mumbled as she moved away.

“That’s because you’re still wearing your jacket and having hot soup,” Yoongi pointed out, putting away some bowls. “Take it off.”

“Want help?”

It was a very innocent suggestion. Thus, Jungkook spent the next minute trying not to reveal that he had popped a boner while eating seaweed soup, sitting up and sticking out his arms like a Ken doll, letting those dreamy, long fingers peel away his oversized white and black racer jacket. Left arm first, then the right, taking care to slide it off, the sleeve cocoon stripping back to reveal the beautiful butterfly that was his fresh, brightly inked right arm.

“Oh? That’s right, you were covering up some big tattoos today, huh?” Yoongi perked up, his raspy voice with a twinge of curiosity, padding over to investigate. Underneath the jacket, Jungkook had worn a closely fitted, white, ribbed tank top. Comfy but wouldn’t get in the way. “Ho, so much color. Quite rockstar of you. You’re become such a cool guy, heh.”

“I wanted the individual images to stand out more and the artist suggested adding some color,” Jungkook clarified, slurping away at his dinner again. “I just trusted him.”

“He did such a good job,” she was saying, delicately holding his hand. Jungkook tried not to melt into a puddle. “The gradient is fantastic. The text here looks cleaner too.”

“Oh, yeah, I asked him to clean up some of my older tattoos too. For consistency.”

He continued munching happily until…

“So, what’s with the boner?”

Jungkook nearly choked again.

“Ay, Yoongi-ssi, leave him alone,” she chided, smacking Yoongi in the butt. Received a scalding squinty side-eye in response but she didn’t seem to give a shit. Nerves of steel. “You know he can’t cum unless I let him.”

Wow, okay, way to broadcast the facts!

“Hey!”

She tilted her head and rubbed the tip of his nose. Open-mouthed smirk included. Gulp. “Am I wrong?”

Against his better judgement, Jungkook pouted. “Noona…”

She patted his thigh. Condescendingly. He intensified his pout but it was futile. “Finish eating, okay? I’ll help you out in the shower…” She winked, devilish. “As usual.”

Yoongi snickered. “Just don’t be too loud.”

“Put on some headphones then,” she countered.

“Oi, I’m not blowing out my eardrums.”

“Then listen,” she hummed, caressing Jungkook’s jeans. “Or watch. No one’s stopping you.”

The bottom of Yoongi’s lips upturned, giving him the expression of a disgruntled cat. “I have to sleep.”

“Oh, like you don’t sleep enough, grandpa.”

“That wasn’t what you were calling me when I had you folded in half under me.”

Jungkook was left to slurp his soup to the sound of their bickering as her hand gently stroked the inside of his thigh. It could be worse. Could be better too, like her unzipping him and establishing dominance by jacking him off at the kitchen island. But Yoongi was not so easily fazed, so she didn’t, and Jungkook cried at (and secretly enjoyed) the feeling of pre-cum soaking through his underwear.

Turns out, he didn’t have to wait that long to enjoy suffering.

Er.

Attention?

Towards the end of his meal was getting a bit annoying to scoop up what was left, so Jungkook put down the spoon to pick up the bowl and drink of the rest of the soup. For a brief second, he was let go and he noticed Yoongi was flicking his hand over his noona’s chest. She grabbed his hand, pulling that scowling face to her into a sudden and tense kiss. Hey, he wasn’t above some adult entertainment while eating. Well, maybe not during the majority of the meal, but Jungkook kept a (big) peeper out. From his periphery, he saw Yoongi slip his hands under her shirt and heard her murmur in satisfaction, trailing kisses over Yoongi’s face. He saw his hyung smile in response, warm and genuine and butterfly-inducing.

Jungkook lowered the bowl slowly as Yoongi opened his eyes.

And winked.

Devilish.

“I’m leaving,” Yoongi suddenly announced, untangling himself and slinking away.

His noona snickered and shook her head. “Okay, nerd.”

Then she turned around and, before Jungkook could say anything about Yoongi running away like a criminal undercover, she revealed that her shirt was now open and fully exposing her perky tits and large, hard nipples.

“Oh!”

Jungkook felt his eyeballs nearly pop out of his skull at the unexpected surprise.

She acted as if they could ever have a normal conversation with her boobs right in front of his face. “So, are you still tired? Just wanna get washed up and go to sleep?”

He tried to answer but from the first word it was impossible. Her pajama shirt was sliding down her perfect shoulders, revealing smooth skin and the flannel fabric cradled her breasts, framing them perfectly. She smelled fresh and fruity, just like her signature lotion scent. Blackberry and vanilla. Her forearms lay against his thighs, forcing his body to turn, and he gasped as her fingers fanned out over his muscular thighs and squeezed them, basically half-crawling into his lap to look up at him, asking her questions in a very leisurely and unbothered tone.

“Tired…?” he echoed, his brain in a completely different dimension. “Wuh?”

Her hands glided up his sides and delicately closed in around his waist. He gasped, stiffening as her touch encased him, feeling the action through the fabric of his tank top. She hummed softly, caressing his waist. Slow. Tender. Not a second of rushing even though blood was rushing straight down into his dick at record speed. He felt her gaze on him and shifted his own to her face, seeing her observe him with lovely eyes that contained all the innocence of a kumiho.

So, none at all.

Her smile reappeared, mysterious and sinful.

Her palm grazed over his tense abdomen and he whimpered under his breath. Or so he thought.

“Feeling good?” she asked serenely.

“Y… Yeah…”

Down. Tracing the button of his jeans. His breath caught in his throat. Fingertip by fingertip, in slow motion, tapping lightly on his bulge. Barely any pressure. Solidly tucked between his legs, her ass sticking out. He would be fine with the other side of the view too. This house needed more mirrors, Jungkook concluded.

“Do you remember why you came to me?”

He stopped staring at her ass as the question registered. He was holding his right arm out and his left elbow was resting on the counter. “In the beginning?”

“Mhm.”

She was now cupping his covered erection and pulsing her grip around it, making his cock throb and leak everywhere. Great. His boxer briefs were a cum-filled mess now, surely. He could feel the squish and the stimulation against the tip. Agonizing pleasure.

His cheeks warmed. “Ah… Yeah… because… my previous girlfriends said I f-fucked like a robot…”

“You think maybe you just weren’t that into them?” she questioned, running her fingertips of her other hand along his back and waist, sending tingles up his spine.

“I…” It was impossible to concentrate. “Ah… Well… A-Aren’t you supposed to fall f-for their personality first…?”

“Is that why you’re into me? My personality?”

Jungkook looked down.

Right at her personali-titties.

He swallowed so hard that he almost choked.

Again.

“Hm?” she mused.

Ripped his gaze from the visual of her prominent nipples hanging down next to his open thighs and into that sly stare that knew everything. Gulp. She continued toying with his crotch, stroking along the length, dipping down to pat the outline of his balls, smirking wider as his cock jerked in his pants. The roar of his heartbeat thundered in his ears. Fuck. It was the power in that gaze. The confidence in her stance. The ability to be below him and be completely, utterly in control. The taste of forbidden fruit, just within reach. The sensation of his whole body being overcome with want and the way she gladly overwhelmed all his senses by her presence alone. She didn’t have to touch him at all. She didn’t have to expose herself. She didn’t have to smell so good. She didn’t have to.

She simply chose to do all those things to drive him even more crazy.

“Yes or no?” she purred.

He could lie, but he was a terrible liar.

“Y… Yes…”

She seemed very satisfied with his response. Slid up between his legs, her hand on his back dropping and gliding up against his chest instead. He shivered, his lips parting as she rose, closer, the warmth of her exhale washing over him, a soft sigh and then their faces close, centimeters from each other with his racing heart under her palm. Her fingers spread out. Her index found his silver chain necklace resting on his collarbones, playing with it with a small smile.

Her other hand was still on top of his hard dick.

Jungkook used to think that there was no way sex could be sexy. The idea of it was sexy. In practice, sex used to be awkward and uncomfortable, but essential to get his rocks off. It felt like something he had to do. But it wasn’t like that, at least with her. Well, he still sometimes felt awkward and uncomfortable, but Jungkook suspected she was doing it on purpose. He didn’t mind though, because she always touched him with such fondness and – maybe this was the delulu talking – but he really didn’t need the sex so much as he needed her to keep looking at him the way she did.

His dick throbbed suddenly in protest.

“Ah–!”

She tilted her head and kissed him.

Placing a chaste kiss right below his lips, the soft press taking his breath away, and then her lips ghosted over his, grabbing a fistful of his tank top and kissing him deeply. Fuck, how he loved her lips. How could he describe them? So fluffy and yet so insistent. Determined, seductive, pulling him to her and sighing, her contented breath filling his lungs and giving him life. His left hand found the collar of her shirt and gripped it tightly, not even realizing he had closed his eyes instinctively, wanting nothing more than to melt into her. Her hair brushed against his cheek and neck. Her scent warmed him, sweet and decadent. Her knuckles pressed into his sternum, unyielding. Her fingers tangled into the silver chain around his neck, possessive.

His brain melted into a puddle of bliss.

He moaned her name into her lips as she parted. She squeezed his inner thigh through his loose jeans. Still, the fabric was too thick for it to be satisfying enough.

“W-Wait…”

“You kinda taste like beef,” she remarked, releasing her hold and patting his chest. “Come on. If we fuck in the kitchen, I’ll have more to clean than your dishes.”

Jungkook felt his cheeks burn. “O… Oh.”

She backed up a step and took way too long to button a single button to cover her breasts again. He spent a good ten seconds gawking at their perky shape and the way her obvious nipples stuck straight out. She acted as if nothing was wrong, lingering between his spread-open thighs.

“You have to shower quickly, right? Go get started and I’ll come wash your back.”

“But, n-noona–!”

Her hand flew up and landed at the base of his neck. Thumb to one side, four fingers on the other. Jungkook froze.

She cocked an eyebrow.

Then she smirked.

His pulse hammered in his throat, so close to being constricted.

“Are you saying you’re flexible enough to wash your own back now?”

Jungkook shook his head so fast his vision blurred. “Nope. I’m weak. Help. I can’t take off my clothes either. Owie. It hurts so much.”

“Mmmm, very convincing.” She didn’t sound convinced. At all.

Damnnit.

-

“Gah!”

She gave him an exasperated look. “As if I haven’t seen you naked before.”

Minutes later, Jungkook found himself sitting in the bathtub, puffing his cheeks as he washed his hair with his left hand and felt the bath sponge rub against his back. Ah. She was leaning over the side of the tub, holding onto his left shoulder and rubbing circles into his back. Aaaah. He had left the plastic on his right arm for now, intending to remove the tape as his last step so he could rinse it off with a gentle, unscented cleanser. The water was lukewarm. Not the greatest, but he didn’t want to steam up the bathroom. It would be bad for the tattoos.

“U-Um… noona?”

“Hm?”

She rubbed down to his lower back. He sat up straighter. There was a wet towel blanketed over his crotch. Not really for any reason other than cold. Yeah. Anyway. She leaned over and kept going, massaging him at the same time. He gasped as she pressed the base of her palm into his muscle and kneaded.

“I… uh… about what I said earlier…”

“Mhm.”

He jumped a little but she was just leaning over to grab the detachable showerhead, adjusting the water to the correct temperature. “I hope… I hope I didn’t offend you or anything. I do like your personality a lot. You’re assertive and funny and you always remember stuff I like,” Jungkook rambled, lowering his left hand. His right was slightly hanging off the edge of the tub to keep it out of the way. Of course, he scrubbed his armpits before she came in. It would have been rude not to clean all the important bits first.

She rinsed off his back. “I’m not worried,” she chuckled.

“Oh, okay.”

“I don’t mind that you’re shallow. It’s flattering, coming from a hot guy like you.”

“That’s good – wait, what?!”

She sprayed the top of his head and sent him into sputters.

“Ah!”

She grabbed his shoulder, quickly and vigorously rinsing off his hair before pulling the showerhead away and turning off the water. Not before spraying him in the chest though. Jungkook found himself with his drenched hair flat against his forehead, making him unable to see. He felt like a wet dog. He almost wiggled away – until her arm slid down and rested against his chest, her other hand slipping under his wet hair and pushing it back, laughing playfully as she spoke.

“Oh, Jungkook. You’re so silly. Don’t worry about nothing,” she sighed, petting his head.

He couldn’t say anything.

Mostly because her tits were now pressed against the top of his back.

Oh, fuck. Her large, soft nipples rubbed against his shoulders. And her breasts, ooh, so plushy. “Everyone knows you like my personality.” So bouncy. Mmmm. “Just like how everyone knows you’ve been thirsting after me since day one.” No, it was more like first thirty seconds of seeing her. “Just like how everyone knows you’re a pain slut.”

Her breasts pressed against his shoulders.

Wait.

What did she say?

She plucked the towel away from his crotch and locked her fingers around his package.

“AAH!”

She slapped a hand over his mouth and pinned him to her body, crouching over him. It was then – how could it be only THEN – that Jungkook’s brain fully registered that she was topless. Possibly bottom-less too! Not only was she naked but also she was roughly massaging his balls with his rapidly hardening length trapped between her thumb and index finger, essentially making a cock ring with her two fingers and a ball cage with the rest. He gasped, rolling his head back onto her shoulder, moaning behind her hand as her touch switched between caress and choking his balls. There was no water in the tub as the drain wasn’t pushed down.

Her hand changed from covering his mouth to slipping two fingers into his lips.

“See? You like this,” she whispered, sultry and low.

He tried to gurgle out, n-no way, but he was too busy lifting his hips and thrusting upwards, trying to get the friction he so urgently desired but couldn’t achieve. She dragged her nails across his balls and his eyelids fluttered, sucking on her fingers, spit trickling past his lips and down his chin, his moan echoing in the bathroom when she finally closed her grip around his aching cock, pumping slow, running a fingertip over the head, slicking out the pre-cum leaking out.

“P-Please…” he whined.

“You gotta get out now,” she reminded him.

“No, please…”

She slowly thrust her fingers into his mouth, rubbing his tongue. “You should wait longer, shouldn’t you?” He tried to shake his head but he couldn’t, his hips bucking as her speed increased. “Don’t want you to get sweaty and all that.” Fuck, please, he wanted to scream and nearly did when she let go and lightly smacked around his stiff erection, slapping his cock against his tense inner thighs. It bounced around, the head dark red, aching for release. He was so hard that his cock popped right back into position, sticking straight upwards between his spread legs. “Do you really think you’ve been a good boy?” His own saliva was dripping down his chin. How did she get this level of desperation out of him so easily? She held his shaft up with only the back of her thumb and firmly smacked his balls, rapid and light, making him cry out and squirm. “Hold it up.”

“N-Noona, please…”

“Hold it up if you want me to suck your dick,” she ordered calmly.

The thrill raced up his spine. His hair was dripping, droplets down his cheeks and neck. This was it. This electric, intense feeling that seemed to control him, his hand ghosting down to wrap around his twitching length, gasping sharply when her fingers left his mouth. She cupped his chin instead, tilting his head up and now they were looking at each other, only for a moment, her sparkling eyes rich with passion, intoxicating pleasure snaking up his core as he melted under her hot gaze.

This was the feeling Jungkook always wanted.

She lowered herself down. He stared at the ceiling as she teased his balls, moaning and lazily stroking his cock as she slapped them, dragged her fingernails over them, squeezed them. Spit on him. He whimpered, teasing the underside of the swollen head of his cock, more, flinching as she spat on him again, gasping as she dug her nails into the sensitive area behind his balls, coaxing himself to the edge and then stopping, building the frustration.

She kissed his hot cheek.

“You’re doing so good,” she murmured into his ear, licking it softly.

Her right hand closed around his left and they edged him together, their fingers laced, her teeth on the curve of his ear and his moan radiating off the tiles. Long, deep strokes, building up the speed. So good. Tight, rapid pace, close, his chest rattling, so close, his eyes rolling back when her hand clamped around the base of his aching cock and squeezed hard, cutting off the high and colliding him into the mental wall, his dismayed cry drowned out by her lips devouring his.

Fuck!

Was he going to get to bust a nut or not?!

-

“Please, don’t.”

He put on his best pout as she held the Magic-8 ball in front of her body. Still wearing her black seamless panties, but that was it. She was lightly sitting on his thighs, straddling him on the bed as she shook it teasingly.

“Noona, come on…”

“Why not? It’ll be fun.”

She lowered it and Jungkook gasped as the black plastic ball touched his chest, wiggling uncomfortably as she rolled it back and forth. Foreign and cold. It warmed up against his skin.  She leaned over him, not adding more pressure, but giving a great full-frontal view with her breasts trapped between her upper arms.

“It won’t be fun for me,” he whined, gripping the sheets tightly.

He reached up to squeeze her breasts, using his left hand, shuddering as he felt her hard nipples against his palm, looking up to see her tongue dance at the edge of her smirk, her tousled hair trailing down her shoulder. That had been the game before. He would ask to have sex. She would shake the Magic-8 ball and get his answer – resulting in twenty-six straight refusals from that evil children’s toy. Unlucky? Maybe. Cursed? More likely. Extra cursed because it was Park Jimin who purchased and gifted her the thing.

Grr.

Jungkook was still pissed about that.

She tilted her head, sending part of her face into delicious shadow.

“We can make it a little game.”

His hand slid down her arm and covered hers.

“No games,” he begged, catching the edge of his lower lip with his teeth. Her eyes shifted down. He was playing all his cards. She muttered under her breath, hah, I love that underlip mole of yours, how can I resist a lip bite, fuck, and those cute, round, big brown eyes… all while lowering herself to him, drawn to his plea, releasing her hold on the Magic-8 ball.

She rolled it on his chest and into his open hand.

“Okay. No games.”

She kissed him again.

A claim to his lips. Soft and insistent, working him into a frenzy, making him grip that hard plastic ball tightly as his breathing shallowed, moaning as her tongue slid in, out, in, out. He felt her hands frame his head, crowning him with her fanned-out fingers. Tingling as her thumb rubbed across his temple. His jaw. His earrings, toying with them, nipping at his lower lip and sucking on it, her warm body settling between his legs, soft to hard, rubbing up against him.

Fuck.

Fuuuuck.

She pulled on his hair roughly and his lip slipped from her teeth due his own whimper, gasping hotly as her kisses danced down his throat, then running her tongue over the trail of kisses. She had a hand planted onto his chest to prevent him from arching his back, lapping at his collarbones daintily as she tugged at a fistful of his still damp hair. Sparks of pain showering down from the crown od head meeting the maddening bliss of her lips on his chest, traveling, decorating his clavicle, each mark of her teeth mirroring the redness of a fallen rose petal.

He tried to lower his chin and shuddered against the hurt, making better and worse at the same time, opening his eyes as she let go of his hair, seeing her sliding down his torso.

That ass.

He felt a nip at his nipple and his breathing hitched, snapping down to see her looking up at him, expression highly amused.

“Pretty nice ass, huh?”

No one said she was humble.

He grinned. “Yeah, I should take a pic and make it my phone background.”

She chuckled, running her tongue over his hard nipple and Jungkook shivered, transfixed by the image and the simultaneous surge of pleasure. He lifted his head higher off the pillow. Shallow breaths, watching, the glossy tip of that dexterous pink muscle against his dark nipple, her lips closing around it, feeling his body stiffen as he felt the sucking sensation vibrate through him. The moan bubbled in his tightened chest as she gently bit, licked, sucked, alternating between the actions. Her fingernails dragged over his sides and flexed abs, electrifying his skin with the pressure. He flinched when she released him and replaced the rough play with kisses, moving across his chest to do the same to his other nipple.

She glanced at him, witnessing his perverse enjoyment with a knowing glint in her eye.

He clutched the Magic-8 ball at his side with in his left hand, falling back into the pillow moaning, writhing slightly as the sucking intensified. Her hand slid down, stroking the inside of his thigh. He could barely feel the side of his half-hard cock brush against the back of her hand.

“F-Fuck… please…”

His entire body jolted when she popped her lips off him and sealed her work with a kiss.

“You’re so impatient, Jungkook,” she hummed, pressing her tongue flat to his nipple and rubbing roughly, saliva sticking to his skin. “So needy.”

His mind was spinning. Blood running hot under his skin, body uncontrollably quivering, clutching the sheets and the Magic-8 ball for dear life. The pent-up arousal was driving him insane but, as a wise man once said, gotaa go insane to stay sane. Or something like that. Jungkook couldn’t remember any wise proverbs right now. He was too horny. She was rising, re-clipping her hair with that cute sheep-shaped claw clip, keeping it out of her smirking face.

“Y-Yes, I am needy… a-ah… please…”

Slipping down, down.

She pressed her palms into the innermost part of his thighs, spreading her fingers over his crotch, and swallowed his cock.

He moaned so loud that Min Yoongi surely heard.

Hey.

No one said Jeon Jungkook was subtle.

Especially when being pleasured.

Immediately his cock swelled at her up-and-down motion that came with tongue and lips and a tight, wet, warm throat that pushed him in as deep as possible. He was always somewhat shocked at how easily she maneuvered him without her hands, preferring instead to use only her mouth to take him all the way to the base and lick at his balls, her constricting throat suffocating the thick head of his cock, and then back up, running the sensitive skin over the roof of her mouth and closing her lips around the tip tighter, teasing the underside of the slit with deft flicks. Then, again, swallowing his growing length, molding her tongue to his girth, slathering saliva over his balls.

God, Jungkook loved the bed suck.

She had an immaculate level of control when giving a blowjob on the bed. He didn’t have to do anything but lay back and relax, occasionally looking down to follow her head movements and see his length glistening in between her plush lips, then collapsing again as the erotic euphoria overtook him again, his chest fluttering with the intensity, his core tightening, lost in lust. He completely forgot the itchiness of his right arm. The colors were brighter under the overhead light and the lotion he had applied right before getting into bed, a sharp contrast to her bare arm against his hip, her elegant hand nestled up his side, her perfect round ass in the air. His pants blending into moans, floating on cloud nine from her tight, soft mouth and agile tongue, wondering how the fuck he got this lucky.

She’s basically a porn star in bed, Park Jimin once said.

She paused when she noticed him watching her again. Extended her pink tongue past her lips, slapping his balls and scooping them up against the base of his cock, raising an eyebrow at him.

Damn.

Truer words had never been spoken.

Then – thankfully – she returned her attention to his cock, except this time it was tighter, faster, and he gasped, feeling her push the head up and force it deeper into her throat when she descended, oh, fuck, he could see her breasts bouncing too, those perfect nipples, damn, obvious wet noises drowned out by the more obscene sounds he was making, crying out, moaning, the pace intense and deliberate and racing, and the only way he could describe it was as if somehow her mouth had become a warm, wet sleeve for his twitching cock, powerfully massaging his length all over, close, his eyes rolling back.

There.

He groaned as he shot into her suffocating throat, wanton and pathetic, finally, his mind going blank, pumping thick cum into that tight pocket and whining as she swallowed, fuck, finally, her pinning his flinching hips down as his shuddering length jerked again, another vicious throb and dripping cum, tears stinging the edge of his vision, gasping out her name as the apex of pleasure consumed his nerves and set them alight.

Fucking finally.

He felt his orgasm squish into the back of her tongue and around the aching head of his cock and he moaned. Long and loud and pornographic. He felt himself twitch in her mouth. She brought him down, slow and wet, a low hum vibrating from her throat to his cock to his core.

Jungkook panted.

Tension shimmered throughout his chest and limbs, keeping him breathless.

Wait.

Her tongue rubbed against the underside of his girth, fanning out along the pulsing, abused head, sending racing sparks over his ass and up his spine.

Wait a second.

Her fingertips glided over his slick balls, squeezing them and making him shudder at the shocking bliss.

I’m still hard.

He yelped, snapping his head down, but it was too late, too late to stop, the afterglow of his last orgasm building towards another, her head sliding up and down, her lips flush to his glossy shaft, him whimpering while he watched, shivering at the lewd image and the idea of back-to-back orgasms, so good, fuck, she looks so good and it feels so fucking amazing, the addictive adrenaline spiking, the lasting buzz radiating all over, oversensitivity increasing the forbidden pleasure, tight and wet and soft, taking him as so deep his balls slapped into her chin, the muscles of his body flexed and tense, hard underneath the soft.

His second orgasm slammed into him.

His head fell back and the pleasure swarmed him, knocking the air out of his lungs, drawing out his lustful moan, his heartbeat roaring in his ears. Her name tumbled out of his lips, praises, swears, her name again, the words mixing together on his confused tongue. She swallowed again, loud to his ears, so obvious, and he trembled all over. The sharp spasm of ecstasy left him rattled, whining, feeling her licking him again but tender, even more gentle this time, slurping around his softening cock, the sensitive skin prickling and pulsating under her warm tongue.

“So… fuck… s-so fucking good…”

Oh, how he loved the feeling of her lips and those kisses feathering his thighs, his crotch, his cock, his balls, shivering in delight, all his previous frustrations making it everything so much more satisfying.

Uh.

He didn’t just think that.

Shit.

“Man, you’re loud.”

“Gah!”

“Hey, Yoongi.”

She planted herself on top of his drenched cock, laying out all over him with her hands on his chest and shoulder. Jungkook gawked at her and then at his hyung standing there at her open bedroom door, looking around at the pastel sheep plushies decorating her room and pausing at the pink bunny and tuxedo cat plush sitting on her desk. Then those dark brown orbs moved back to her ass leaning against Jungkook’s still trembling thigh.

“You could have taken off your panties,” he grumbled in his low voice.

She turned her head to look back at Yoongi. “Sorry. I didn’t think about it since I wasn’t going to get any tonight. I didn’t know you would be watching.”

Her words made Jungkook frown. “What do you mean, you aren’t getting any?”

She faced him again, raising her eyebrows. “What are you talking about? We shouldn’t push it. You’ll get too sweaty.”

“But, noona, that’s not fair, I could…?”

Silence.

A bird cawed outside.

“Use you left hand?” Yoongi snorted. “Meh.”

She smiled. “I’ll wait. I can be patient.”

Yeah, well, guess who couldn’t be patient?

As the youngest, he protested. “You could use my thigh. Or… Or my forearm! You like that!”

“No, no. I’m fine with waiting.”

“You’re doing this on purpose! You’re torturing me by not letting me feel you cum!”

Jungkook paled as his hyung and noona grinned at the same time. Deviously. In unison. Scary as fuck. Yoongi leaned against the doorframe, arms crossed, his long black hair framing his cunning eyes and open-mouthed smirk, serving every bit the allegations of being sex on legs. Jungkook trembled as he felt her trail her fingers along the base of his neck, sensually rubbing his collarbone. Thumb on one side, four fingers on the other. Not moving up but reminding him nonetheless.

“Whatever gave you that impression?” she drawled.

They were in cahoots.

Not that Jungkook minded.

That was how he got this lucky in the first place.

The Magic-8 ball rested against his naked hip, the window reading, without a doubt.

--

masterpost

[fir3ylolol]

break up, make up

pairing: Johnny Cage x Reader

summary: You and Johnny didn't end your relationship on a good note. You've successfully avoided him, but what happens when you both end up at the same bar??

word count: 2.46 k

tw: Vaginal sex, oral sex, cunnilingus, afab!reader, gn pronouns, dom!reader, sub!johnny cage, forgiveness, make up sex, vaginal penetration, grinding, semi-public sex, begging, mentions of cheating, making out, no spoilers, he's so pussywhipped dude, praise kink, no other canon characters, smut, shameless smut, porn with plot

a/n: I've never really written fic b4 so I hope it's not shit. Slightly inspired by 3d-wifey, they are an actually good writer

Ao3

Johnny stared daggers at you from across the room. Why did he have to show up here? It had been a couple of months since you two split up and this was the first time you’d seen each other since. All you wanted was a nice night out with friends, which was already hard enough. But there he is, just 1000 feet away.

It hadn’t been easy. You had been with him for over a year and for the most part, it was fine. Despite his career and fame, he managed to find plenty of time for you. He loved to spoil you, spend time with you, and show his love wholeheartedly. That was until he had a long shoot overseas. He promised that everything would be fine and nothing would change. After 2 long months, he finally returned. But something felt off. He didn’t hold you like he used to, spent less time at home, and you didn’t see the love in his eyes anymore. A very dramatic breakup ensued, complete with tears and screaming from both of you. You moved out and quickly lost contact. Trying to cope as article after article about him returning to his ‘playboy lifestyle’ came out, you decided that he wasn’t worth your time, that he killed the relationship because he was bored of you. And so you tried your hardest, knowing that running into him again was unlikely. He’s too busy being famous, right?

Right?

Wrong.

Because there he was, same old Johnny, in a red button-up shirt with the arms rolled up and the top two buttons undone. Black slacks straining against his thighs, expensive watch glistening in the low light of the club. And, fuck, that look on his face. You couldn’t fully read it, and you weren’t sure if you were scared or interested.

Trying not to look at him, you brush off your clothes. You want to seem cool, calm, unbothered. Something you weren’t. But you weren’t turning around again to look. You just laugh with your friends and continue to enjoy your night. Until…

“Why, hello there dear,” his familiar voice rang out in your ears. You froze, the familiarity and warmth were something you hadn’t heard in a very long time. Slowly turning, you meet his eyes, trying, and failing, to hide your nerves. But when you meet his eyes, you can’t read anything. His words are cool, calm, and suave, but his eyes? Ice cold. It made you feel worse. You manage to utter a “Hello Johnny” as he stands there, his presence looming. Your friends look to you for guidance, but you nod, letting them know you’re fine. But they take that to mean, ‘you can leave now’, because they walk away, leaving you alone with him.

The exact opposite thing of what you wanted, honestly.

But it's too late for that. You take a deep breath and look directly at him, trying to seem brave. He leans against the table, looking around before sitting down across from you. “So, why are you out tonight? Trying to find another guy to disappoint?” His words cut deep, harsh accusations that offend you. “Excuse me?” you question, leaning towards him. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Don’t act innocent, we both know you’re not,” He scoffs, leaning back in his chair and looking at the crowd. You scrunch your face up in frustration, feeling the anger bubble up inside you. “You know, you’re not exactly innocent either. You leave for 2 months, you don’t talk to me once, and when you’re finally back, you treat me like shit! I honestly preferred it when you were gone, at least then I didn’t feel like complete garbage.” You try not to cry, unable to stop your eyes from watering. Your words seem to soften Johnny slightly, as he looks back and seems more awkward than angry. “What do you mean? I didn’t do that.” “WHAT?” you nearly yell, surprising yourself and him. “You came back a different person! You weren’t the man I fell in love with anymore. You were cold and cruel, just like you are now.” You reach for your bag and move to stand up and leave, but he nearly dives across the table, grabbing your arm. “Wait, wait, please don’t go. I’m sorry. Please just…let me explain.”

You slowly sit back down, shrugging out of his grip, and stare at him, waiting. He finally seems nervous, scratching the back of his neck. “I won’t beat around the bush. I thought that while I was gone, you were cheating on me.” He looks away, clearly ashamed. “I don’t know why. I didn’t have proof. I just…I’m used to people leaving a lot sooner than you, so I assumed the worst. I didn’t think I acted that poorly, but I’m sorry. You didn’t deserve that. I’ll just leave you alone now.” His head hung slightly in shame, he started to stand.

But now it's your turn to stop him, gently taking his arm and making him sit down again. You both pause, waiting for the other to speak. Quietly, you begin to laugh, your whole body shaking. You manage to get out a muffled, “We’re so stupid.” He slowly starts laughing as well, both of you absorbing the absurdity of the situation. After a bit, you both calm down, managing to speak again. You learn that he’s been cast in a new show and that the rumors spreading around have been untrue. He learns about how you’ve been, your true interest in how you are shining through.

“Hey, you look really good, you know?” He gently takes your hand and stares into your eyes. All of a sudden, the mood shifts. Reconnecting with him has reconnected something else, something you didn’t quite expect. His words rest heavily in the air, trying to gauge how you’re feeling. You look into his eyes, the kindness and care he used to show you returning. “You look good too. Better than I remember, honestly.” He laughs, touching your arm more. “I always look this good baby.”

His eyes, now half-lidded and sultry, beckon you closer. You decide to be brave, take initiative. You get up from your seat, standing next to him. Still holding his hand, you pull him up. “Yeah? Wanna show me if everything else stayed the same?” You coax him up, getting closer to him. His smile grows wider, and he stands up and wraps his arms around your waist. “Gladly, baby.” You wave to your friends, who honestly can’t tell if it’s the right thing to let you go with him, but decide to let you. If it’s a mistake, at least you’ll learn from it.

He leads you to his car, a sleek black sports car parked in the virtually empty private parking lot out back. The perks of being famous apparently include better parking. He unlocks the door, letting you sit down first. He climbs into the driver’s seat, turning his body to look at you. “So, my place or yours-” Before he can finish that thought, you reach over, grabbing his face and kissing him gently. He is clearly shocked but quickly leans into it, growing more passionate by the minute. He turns and grabs your hips, trying to get you closer to him. You didn’t realize how completely touch-starved and needy you were until right then. You pull away and take a breath, panting lightly in sync with him. Your hand travels down his chest slowly, dancing towards his crotch. You feel his breath hitch under you, lightly whimpering at the feeling.

Lightly brushing against him and teasing him further, he starts to grow needier, pleading eyes looking directly at you. “Please…please love…” he whines out. You decide to be nice, but not that nice. Slowly unzipping his fly and freeing him, he hisses at the feeling of the cool air in the car. Gently taking him into your hand, you truly forgot how big he is. You lean over, spitting onto his dick and slowly stroking him. He starts to moan lightly, flinching as you flick your wrist over the tip. “Ah-h! H-heyy…stop teasing…” he looks through his lashes, desperation evident.

Finally giving in, you lean down, taking as much of him into his mouth as you can at this angle. He gasps, leaning back and biting his finger to stop himself from being too loud. You look up, wide eyes meeting his. You lift your head, taking a deep breath. “Don’t quiet yourself. I wanna hear those pretty moans, baby.” His eyes lightly roll back at your words, moaning louder when you return to his weeping cock, keeping a quick, almost torturous, pace. He shakily reaches out to grab your head, not forcing you down, just feeling you and trying to remain stable.

You lift your head again, kissing him hard and rough. He desperately tries to keep up, lips slipping against yours messily. You take his hand, leading it down to your crotch. “Touch me, love. Please, I need it.” You rasp out, making him shiver. As he reaches into your underwear, he nearly melts at the feeling of how wet you are. His fingers gently curl into you, feeling you pulse around him hungrily. He gently pulls his hand out, looking at the slick on his fingers before shoving them in his mouth greedily. Groaning at the taste, he reaches his free hand out to grab your thighs, feeling your soft skin under his desperate touch. “Mmfph, alwaysh taste so goodf me,” he tries to speak with his fingers still in his mouth, not wanting to stop. He tries again to taste more but you stop him, to many protests.

But they quickly stop when you take you underwear off, slipping it out from under you and tossing them in the back seat. “Push your seat back,” you state casually, but you both know it’s a command. Hurriedly, he scrambles for the seat controls, moving himself as far back as possible. He looks to you, then down at himself. He pulls his pants and underwear down further, then looks to you excitedly. Carefully, you reach your right leg over him, straddling his lap. You can feel him throb against your leg, impossibly fast, and the wetness he can’t seem to stop. You pause, looking down at him. “I want to hear you say you want this before I do anything. If this is how we rekindle our relationship, it’s starting on a good note. And if not, then it’ll end on one. But I need to hear you say it.”

Quickly, he grabs at your thighs, tight grip digging into you. “Yes, yes, please. I need you. I’ve missed you so bad and, and just want to be with you right now. I need it. I need you. Please…” His desperate pleas and pathetic expression shoot to your core, you can feel yourself growing even wetter. That was all the motivation you need as you lift yourself up and grab his dick, lining it up with teasing touches against you, earning groans and gasps every time. Finally, you start to sink down, wincing. It’s been a while and Johnny is a lot to handle. But he doesn’t notice. His head is thrown back, strings of long whines, moans, and other pornstar sounds pouring from his mouth. His sounds are motivation enough as you sink down as far as possible. It’s like you knocked the wind out of him, gasps are all you get out of him for now. You take a second to adjust further.

Then, you begin to move. Hips rocking back and forth, forehead pressed into his shoulder. You speed up, bouncing on him as you basically use him. It’s not like he minds, whimpers echoing through the car, hands death gripping onto your ass as you ride him. He genuinely can’t control himself, babbling near nonsense. You can make out a few of the words he’s saying in your ear. “Love”, “s’good”, “missed this”, and “feel incredible” is about it amongst the uncontrollable moans. You can definitely tell that it's been a long time. I mean, he’s usually pretty whiny, but this takes the cake. 

He manages to get a solid couple of sentences out in his fucked out state, wrapping his arms around you like a hug. “I missed you so bad, I knew it was a mistake. No one that feels this good could be bad. I missed being yours, missed having you use me like this. I love it, I love you.” His hips jerk upwards without rhythm, desperate to get off. His words egg you on further, speeding up and absolutely shaking the car. His grip on you tightens as you can tell he’s about to cum. You whisper shakily into his ear, “Come on baby, cum for me. Be a good boy for me.” With that, he finishes with a loud cry, a death grip around you and shaking thighs. He trembles beneath you, still sensitive from the comedown. You smooth out his hair, brushing the hairs stuck to his forehead from sweat. Still fuzzyheaded, he kisses you tenderly, full of love.

You slowly climb off and get back in your seat, catching your breath. But you don’t have long, as Johnny grabs your leg and twists you. Exposing you as you lean against the car door, you barely have time to think before he dives in, eating you out with such fervor that you genuinely can’t believe he got down there that fast. After his sweet words and all that you’ve done, you’re not that far from the edge. He hasn’t forgotten all the ways to make you cum though, as he quickly gets you even closer. He rubs his nose against your clit, causing you to jump at the sensitivity. But then, his head backs up slightly, which you can’t take at this moment. You have to finish. You grab his head, fingers tangling in his hair, and fuck his face hard. He is moaning again at this point, your pleasure gets him off just as much as his own. You lose the ability to think about anything but cumming, your sole goal. Finally, you finish, your grip on him loosening. But he stays just as close, burying his face in you and lapping up your cum mixed with his.

He finally pulls away, both of you gasping for air. You are suddenly much more thankful for being parked in a more secluded area. After what feels like forever, you turn and whisper out, “Am I as good as you remember?” Turning his head, he laughs and whispers, “Better than I remembered.”

[holy-puckslibrary]

━ 𝐅*𝐂𝐊 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐁𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐑.

-ˏˋ. 𝐦𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 ˊˎ-

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 — FWB!matthew tkachuk x f!reader 𝐰𝐜 — 1.7k 𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬 — "old habits die hard..." — or, your boyfriend won’t fuck you right, so you run to the one person who always does.

𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 — patrons know the chokehold this toxic sin-fest has on me and probably always will... in all seriousness, this is one of my favorite things i've ever published and i am so insanely proud of it. i hope you love it as much as i do <3

(spoiler — not possible teehee)

18+ MDNI — content warnings under the cut.

𝐜𝐰 — profanity, innuendo, matthew’s filthy mouth and lack of morals, cheating (not on matty or the reader), outdated/incorrect information about having sex for the first time, borderline too much degradation, some objectification to add a little spice, unprotected sex w a cheeky creampie (what did you expect from two morally bankrupt individuals written by me, a retired whore?), matthew being a noncommittal, possessive piece of shit joking about knocking people up for funzies

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“D’you think you’re so addicted to my cock because you know I don’t give a fuck what you think about me? Or care if you think I’m a Nice Guy?”

Even buried to the hilt—bare with nothing between you and far too fucking close for comfort—Matthew Tkachuk runs his mouth like he’s got nothing to lose and even less to prove. He’s insufferable, his only redeeming quality being the pulsing appendage threatening to split you in half as you buck in his lap.

With your hands braced against his hard chest for leverage, you drown out his grating voice, chasing the white-hot surges, bolts of lightning leading you to the brink of collapse with renewed vigor.

The sooner you come, the sooner he’s gone.

“All I care about, sweetheart, is fucking you good and hard. Giving it to you like the hungry, cockdrunk whore that you are.”

Debonair attitude. Sly confidence. Vulgar demeanor.

Filthy fucking mouth.

You were warned about Matthew Tkachuck. Repeatedly. Warned about him and his complete lack of a filter, about his total disregard for anyone’s feelings but his own. His aversion to commitment, to monogamy, to propriety.

All the things that repulse you about the man lounging on expensive hotel sheets beneath you—as you do all the work—lure you back to him in equal measure. He shouldn’t turn you on, but that’s exactly why he does. He’s all wrong, wrong, wrong.

Which makes him just right.

“I bet if your fiancé walked in right now, you’d just keep riding me. You wouldn’t even notice, would you? After all, you haven’t cum yet. And that’s all you care about, right? Using my cock to get your rocks off because Billy Boyfriend’s too scared to give you what you really need. Lucky for you, I’m not a fuckin’ pussy. I don’t treat you like a fragile doll because I know you’ll take anything I give you—and beg for more. I treat you like what you are, not some chaste little princess.”

You’ve been with Bill for nearly a decade, engaged for more than a year. It’ll be a spring wedding, probably. If the venue pans out, and the caterer finally calls you back with a final quote.

Perfect on paper.

He doesn’t pay attention to you the way he used to. Just throws money at the problem until he can bury himself in work again, undisturbed by you or nagging obligation.

Flowers for being three hours late, a necklace for missing dinner entirely. A trip overseas when he had to go into the office on your anniversary.

But he’s nice, so fucking nice it hurts, and more loyal than the Golden Retriever he wants to adopt after the honeymoon. After you’re settled into a custom-build nestled comfortably in the suburbs and far away from the city. White picket fence, manicured lawn, barely-there speed limits.

It's all so nauseatingly idyllic. So perfectly attuned with what you thought you wanted, what you spent your childhood coveting.

All your single friends are jealous; your committed friends are resentful. Your family loves him, and even though you’ve got a fucked up way of showing it, so do you.

And he loves you too. He’s just busy. It’ll be different once we’re settled, he says. You try to believe him, though not as hard as you should. You tell yourself it's because he doesn’t either.

Bill’s gotten lazy. You’ve gotten bored.

You’re no angel, and never claimed to be. You just want to feel good.

Matthew barks out a dry laugh, almost like he can read your mind.

“You haven’t been since I first got you on your knees at his birthday party. And definitely not after I popped that sweet cherry you were so adamant about saving for him."

Bill doesn’t fuck you. He never has.

He makes love to you. It’s that romance-novel tenderness that got you here in the first place. Slow, sweet, and nearly devoid of passion. It’s so gentle you have to think of him just to come.

How he fucks you.

How tightly he yanks your hair, craning your neck until it aches. How hard he kneads and smacks your ass, bullying the skin until you sob. How deep his cock reaches. And how he takes, takes, takes without forethought. How could you accept a lifetime of only tame rutting in the face of Pavlovian depravity?

It’s awful, and it's so profoundly selfish, but his everything has you in a bind.

Matthew’s everything is ruining your life.

An uncharacteristic wave of guilt and sadness washes over you, and before you can catch yourself, you’re staring down at the engagement ring. The band constricts, digging into your finger like it's out for blood when you glimpse the indentation it left behind on Matthew’s peck. You wince, then choke down the shame lodged in your throat, screwing your eyes shut to will it away.

“If it's bothering you that much, take it off. I’ll keep it safe for you.” —wink— “I can’t imagine the weight of a rock like that, especially one you don’t even deserve. But, if you actually felt as guilty as you claim to, you wouldn’t be this wet on another man’s cock. Don’t play saint now. You’ll ruin the fun.”

You can’t do this right now; you can’t have this worn-out fight. So, you say what you always say even though you’ve long since stopped trying to mean it.

“You keep saying that, sweetheart. We should stop. This is the last time. But no matter what you say, you always come crawling back to me sooner or later because I have what you need. Because I’m not him. Because I fuck you better.”

His words light you on fire. You hate it, but how deeply your body enjoys them is undeniable. How tightly you squeeze and flutter with every degrading line, choking his cock as you use him to satisfy your own perverted needs. How his brutal honesty, his refusal to let you forget your zealous participation in the affair for even a second, arches your back and hardens your nipples.

Even without all that evidence stacked against you, the blitzed-out look on your face says it all. One look at you and everyone would know just how right Matthew is.

“Shut the fuck up,” you growl.

You say it for the sake of saying it. To know, when you curl into Bill's side tonight, that you said something to deny his assessment of you.

But the last thing you want is for him to shut his mouth.

Not right now, not when you’re right there—

“You can’t hide from me, sweetheart, and you can’t lie to me. You can’t fool me, either. I see right fucking through you. It terrifies you—and you love it.”

His raspy voice swims freely through your hollowed-out mind. It unwittingly thumbs through every unforgivable memory, like some sort of pornographic Rolodex.

Matthew’s hips grinding against yours in darkened corners and dive-bar bathroom stalls and poker tables.

His hands fighting against hard-earned sweat in the foggy backseat of his car, battling to find purchase anywhere he can so he can keep rutting with reckless abandon before you’re expected home.

His fingertips burrowing into the sides of your throat, hard enough to bruise, hard enough to silence, hard enough to hurt.

Him spilling inside of you, ropes painting the sacred place white with no remorse or expectation of responsibility.

Matty’s hand over your mouth, urging you to be fucking quiet as he pistons in and out, in and out, keeping you pinned against the bathroom door, against the only thing standing between Bill and the worst discovery of his apple-pie life—

Old habits die hard.

Especially when it’s one that always feels that fucking good. No matter how lecherous or immoral.

Or how badly the betrayal would hurt someone underserving and innocent.

“Even if you walk down that aisle and take his last name, you’ll still belong to me. Wedding or not, this pathetic, weeping cunt belongs to me. But it’s all gonna be okay, though. Don’t you worry that pretty, empty head. I don’t mind sharing my toys. Especially with someone who could never compete.”

You can't compete where you don't compare.

He doesn’t want to be your boyfriend. He doesn’t want to be anyone’s boyfriend. He isn’t the Relationship Type. He doesn’t even want to be exclusive. That’s part of his appeal, no matter how fervently you deny it. He doesn’t want more than pleasure—primal, deviant pleasure—and that’s all you're looking for.

That's all you need.

“Where do you want my load, dirty girl?”

“Inside. I-Inside me, please, Matty.”

“Right answer.”

The burst of warmth is like getting a perfect grade you didn’t earn. Or feeling the cash your sibling gave you in exchange for not ratting them out sitting in your back pocket. It's hard to feel bad about the wrong you’ve done when the payoff is so deliciously worthwhile.

Matthew twitches, still hugged by your sensitive walls, and you shudder.

This is the high you chase every time you bend your morals until they splinter. The still nothingness that lays beyond the denouement, where everything is glowy and the pit inside you appears not-so-bottomless for once. The lack of expectations and obligations. The sheer freedom that stringless pleasure, that sensual self-indulgence provides.

Matthew doesn’t owe you anything, you don’t owe him anything either, and neither of you pretends otherwise.

And you sure as fuck don’t trip on his dirty laundry every time you walk into the bedroom.

“If that doesn’t take,” Matthew flicks his hips in emphasis, “…let me know when and where you want your wedding present, sweetheart.”

You don’t answer. You push his hands away and roll off of him unceremoniously. But he keeps talking.

Matthew is always talking.

“Oh, and before I forget, would you be a dear and let Billy know I won’t be able to make it for his bachelor party? I don’t know why, but I have the oddest feeling that something desperately needing my attention will come up.”

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All of the stories and fantasies written or discussed on this blog by the owner or by followers are purely fictional and are not intended to offend any parties.

©2023 holy-pucks, all rights reserved. I do not give consent for any of my work to be copied, re-posted or translated here, on Tumblr, or on any other platform. Reproduction of any content from this blog is considered plagiarism.

-

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[sweetbans29]

Long Way Home - CC

Pairing: Caitlin Clark x Reader

Part 2

Summary: Due to a huge miscommunication, Caitlin and your sister Kate are put through the worst week of their life (based on THIS request)

Warnings: angst my peeps (you asked for it), a happy ending

Word Count: 3.2k

Sweetbans Masterlist

AN:

"I don't want you to go," Caitlin says, holding you against her. Your girlfriend of 2 years has not let you go for the last 3 days.

"That makes two of us," your older sister Kate says as she finishes making the three of you grilled cheeses.

Typically you would be the one to cook but since Caitlin had her arms around you 24/7 and the fact that you wouldn't be there pretty soon to make sure they are fed, you opted to let Kate take the lead in making food.

You were given your assignment a few days back and are about to head overseas. You knew this day was coming and so did your family and friends, but knowing never made it any easier.

Growing up, you knew you wanted to serve your country when you graduated high school. You knew when your elementary school hosted a day when active military staff and veterans came to your school for a service day. Your little third-grade self looked up to them and wanted to be them someday.

You went into the military right out of high school - going through training and then getting stationed only about twenty minutes out from where your older sister was going to college. It honestly was the best possible outcome for you starting off.

Kate meant the world to you. She's been your best friend since day one. Growing up people always thought the two of you were twins and honestly, you would have believed them. Kate is only 16 months older than you. The way your parents put you in school, Kate was a grade above you which kept the two of you close. The hardest year was when she went to college and you were stuck in your senior year of high school. The two of you would talk 24/7. She kept you updated on the transition from high school to college and you would keep her updated on your parents.

It was in Kate's sophomore year that Caitlin came onto the scene - Kate and she had become good friends as Kate took the freshman under her wing. You met Caitlin only a few weeks after Kate. You had some time in between training and your first post - deciding it would be fun to spend a few weeks with Kate. She introduced the two of you and it was like you had known each other your whole lives.

It was on that same trip that Caitlin asked you out, of course asking Kate for permission first. You didn't hesitate to say yes and the rest has been history. Caitlin's love for you hit hard right from the start and never stopped growing - you were the person to come into her life and opened her eyes as to why it hasn't worked with anyone else. Caitlin knew you were her end game.

Once you were stationed just outside of Iowa City, you moved in with Kate. Life was the best it had been in a while. You would go to all of Kate and Calitlin's home games and support them to the best of your ability. It was cool to get to meet more of their team, and they all loved you. How could they not? Kate and your apartment had been the hub for a lot of the team hangouts. It was a no-brainer since you had the best setup. Caitlin also practically lived there, which was also a pull as she would encourage the team since it meant she got to spend more time with you.

Slowly but surely Caitlin started bringing stuff over and found a home for it within your room. You not once complained seeing as she didn't really have much but knew how serious it was when she brought over her PS5 and her most worn basketball shoes.

"Are you sure it is okay that I am bringing all this stuff over?" She asks.

"I promise you, babe. It is perfect." You say and give her a smile.

"I just don't want to overstep," she says and you take hold of her shoulders.

"Hey - you know I don't make promises I don't mean," you say. She nods sheepishly. "I promise, this is exactly where you are meant to be." You reassure her.

When you found out you would be going overseas you had a sit-down conversation with Caitlin to break the news to her. She doesn't hide her frustration well but knows how much you pride yourself in serving your country. You tell her that when you go, she has to move in with Kate - not wanting either of your favorite people to be alone. You crack jokes with Caitlin about how she practically already lives there in an attempt to lighten the mood.

This brings it back to Kate making grilled cheeses with you sitting on the counter holding Caitlin.

"They are ready!" Kate yells in excitement over the perfectly cooked sandwiches. You grab a plate and immediately take a bite.

"Ahhh! Hot! Hot!" You say as you try to blow off the piece you had just taken a bite out, refusing to spit it out.

"Babe, you do that every time - will you ever learn?" Your girl teases you she grabs her own plate, blowing it off before taking a small bite herself.

"Hey, sometimes waiting is overrated." You say and go in for another bite. "Plus, when something is this good, if you could you would eat it in one bite."

The rest of the night is filled with light banter, cuddles from your girl, and another attempt at packing (which was quickly shut down when Caitlin held you captive on your bed, not allowing you to move).

Time moved faster than anyone would have liked as your send-off arrived. Your family came out, along with Caitlin and some of her team. They were there more as a support to Caitlin and Kate than to see you off but you were incredibly thankful for them.

You give hugs to your mom and dad first - they knew this day was coming and had much time to prepare yet still let out muffled sobs and final last-ditch pleas to stay.

You give hugs to all the girls who came in support of your two favorites and tell each and every one of them to watch over both Kate and Caitlin while you are away.

Kate is next. The two of you stand there embracing each other, neither of you saying anything knowing everything already. It is only before you release your sister that she whispers something in your ear.

"I've got her," Kate says and for the first time yet you feel a tear roll down your cheek. You wipe it away as fast as it appears, not wanting to make this any harder for anyone.

You whisper a thank you and release her - looking at her with the best smile you could muster up.

Finally, you turn to the love of your life. And runs into your embrace faster than you can brace for impact.

"I want to tell you not to go," she says with a sniffle. "But I know how much this means to you."

"I will be back before you know it," you say - trying to believe your own words. The truth is, you don't know when you will be back - this is an open-ended assignment which wasn't common in the military but due to where you are going is needed for the mission.

"I will call whenever I can and I will write," you tell her. "It will be our own little movie."

"Just come back to me, okay?" She says as your heart breaks hearing the desperation in her voice.

You separate from her just enough to reach down and grab her hand. A few months ago you had gotten her a dainty little ring embellished with diamonds for your anniversary. It was by no means an engagement ring or promise ring but in this moment it would have to do.

"I promise I'll come back to you," you say removing the band from her right hand and placing it on her ring finger. Caitlin knows to not take your promise lightly. She knows you would do anything to get back to her.

Both of you know that there is never a guarantee but the little gesture was enough for both of you to have faith in your promise.

You say your final goodbyes and before you know it you are off.

The first few months are hard as it is an adjustment for everyone. You Facetime Caitlin and Kate as much as you can - thankful that the wifi connection you had was stable. You told her as much as you could about where you were at, making sure not to disclose anything that would scare either of your girls. Kate would update you on the usual - this not being too far off from what her transition to college was. Caitlin on the other hand took the transition really hard, always crying in Kate's arms after the call ended. None of which was disclosed to you.

The next few months were harder as you were moved to a secondary location where the wifi was less stable - sometimes cutting out for a few weeks or more at a time. You sent letters to let them know you were doing okay even if a call didn't come. Every letter you would end with 'Slowly making my way back to you' then your signature. Caitlin would grip every word you wrote, most of the time falling asleep with them in her hand.

You were almost up to your year mark with no update on when you would be able to return home. They had moved you back to a base that had better wifi which was helpful in keeping up with Caitlin but still not as good at giving her a date when you would be home.

Caitlin was doing better and was able to keep her composure after calls with you. Whenever you would have a call with your girl, Kate would jump on towards the end of the call and tell you how Caitlin was really doing. Most of the time it would end with your girl getting frustrated with your sister for disclosing more than what was needed but you always appreciated it.

It was when things started to feel normal when it all hit the fan.

Kate and Caitlin had just finished their shoot-around before one of their home games and were about to head into the locker to get ready when one of the assistant coaches told them they needed to head to Coach Bluder's office immediately.

The two girls redirected to head to the office thinking it had to do with tonight's game. The sight they are met with is one that causes immediate confusion.

"Mom? Dad?" Kate asked, shocked to see her parents standing in her coach's office. Your mom is a wreck in the arms of your dad who has clearly shed his own fair share of tears. Coach Bluder looks like she has seen a ghost and tells Kate and Caitlin to take a seat.

"What's going on?" Caitlin says immediately feeling her stomach drop thinking there is only one reason they would be here.

"Why don't you two sit," Coach Bluder presses again.

"No, I think I would rather stand," Caitlin retorts. She is trying to tell herself if she doesn't give in to what they are asking then the news won't be real. Kate touches Caitlin's arm, starting to come to her own conclusions, and takes a seat.

Your dad is the first and only to speak.

"We got a visit this morning," he starts only looking into Caitlin's eyes. He refuses to look into his daughter's eyes, knowing he will not get through what needs to be said.

"There was an attack to which they said there were no survivors." He says as slow as molasses.

Caitlin just stares at him. Not yet has he mentioned your name or anything about you specifically which only prolongs reality.

Kate asks if they had to send you there to help out, then proceeds to ask if you are hurt. She doesn't understand why Mom is so torn up over that.

Your dad's eyes are still trained on Caitlin's, not breaking to look at Kate when she asks.

"It was her base-" Your dad barely gets out before Caitlin is countering.

"Bullshit," Caitlin says, not blinking twice. She refuses to believe the words coming from your dad's mouth. Normally this would have taken him back but under the circumstances, he was ready for any and all reactions.

That is when your mom cut in.

"They found her tags," she sniffles out. Before she is sobbing again she says, "Alongside an unidentifiable body."

"They are still searching, but they told us not to be hopeful." Your dad finishes as Kate breaks down like her mother.

Calitin on the other hand is completely numb. Her head is spinning and she feels like she is going to throw up. Before anyone can speak again, she runs out of the room.

She runs directly home, entering your once-shared apartment. She makes her way to your shared room and just stands in the doorway. She hadn't changed a single thing since you left, not wanting you to come home to a completely different place. That thought flies out the window when the pain settles in and the reality of you not returning hits her like a ton of bricks.

Caitlin's hands go swinging. Throwing anything she could get her hands on. By the time she is done, she is out of breath - the room looks like a tornado hit.

She finally falls to the floor - letting out the loudest cry.

Picking up one of your old Military sweatshirts, she puts it over her head and holds herself.

You on the other hand are sitting in the most uncomfortable plane imaginable - giddy to get back to surprise your two favorite girls. Your Leutienet set up a charter for you and a select other few to fly back to the States. It was something that only he and one other person knew about, not wanting news to get out.

You knew it was going to take you a long time to get back but with the three plane switches and delays due to equipment transfers - your 2 day trip quickly doubled.

It wasn't until day 4 that you were finally crossing back into US territory. Once your plane entered US airspace, your excitement grew even more. You knew there wasn't going to be any communication to anyone prior to your arrival which made the surprise that much more fun for you.

When you finally arrived at the base - you were met with a crowd of people. Confused, you started asking what happened. One of the captains pulled your group aside and let you know there was an attack and that they didn't know if you were a part of it or not.

It was hard to hear but you were so over the moon about seeing your sister and your girlfriend that you didn't think of the possibility of them thinking that you were a part of the bombing.

When you got in your rental - you thought it would be better to surprise them in person than give them a call. You want to see the joy in their eyes when they first hear your voice back home.

You make the drive to your apartment and park along the street. You are still in uniform as you walk up the steps of your apartment. It is the middle of the morning and expect both girls to be back from practice.

Unlocking the door you walk in.

All the blinds are closed and there are tissues everywhere. Food boxes are left on the table and counter, and most of the food is uneaten. You furrow your eyebrows as you see a sleeping Caitlin in Kate's lap. She looks absolutely sickly with her head being stroked by Kate as Kate's eyes try to adjust to the new light source entering their apartment.

The light is so bright that it takes her a few moments to make out the figure standing in the light as you.

"This isn't real," you hear Kate mumble. "You're not real."

You slowly close the door and make your way over to your sister. You were expecting excitement and happy tears and love as you walked in but were met with none of that.

"She's gone," Kate cries. "You're gone. This isn't real." She keeps saying over and over.

It is then when it hits you that everyone thought you were a part of the bombing.

You slowly make your way to your sister as you kneel in front of her and your still-sleeping girlfriend. Little to your knowledge, this was the first time that Kate was able to get Caitlin to sleep for more than 10 minutes before she ended up screaming your name and jolting awake.

Kate is so defeated that her hand doesn't even come up to try and touch you to see if you are real. She is so convinced she is hallucinating.

It is only when your hand comes up and touches her face that she lets out a gasp and a sob. She cries out your name, waking Caitlin.

Caitlin blinks a few times while she sits up. Her hands come to rub her eyes, trying to get them to unblur from all the built-up tears that had fallen.

She smells you before she sees you. Feeling a sense of peace wash over her before more tears are falling. She still hasn't seen you kneeling right in front of her. Kate is sobbing into a pillow - in shock at who is before her.

Your hand comes up to Caitlin's and she jumps, removing it from yours. Tears begin to roll down your face as you can't imagine the living hell she has been through these last few days.

"Caitlin," you say in the gentlest tone. Her head whips up, eyes finally meeting yours.

At first, her eyes flash with rage. Not rage at you but rage at herself for initially believing you are there. They are then in shock - not comprehending the sight in front of her. Her heart stops as she says your name.

Your hands come to her face as you caress both of her cheeks.

"They said you were gone," Caitlin says in disbelief. tears streaming down her face as her hands come up to yours. "They found your tags." Caitlin really doesn't know what to say. She still doesn't believe you're in front of her until she hears you speak again.

"I promised I would come back to you, when have I ever broken a promise?" You say as you bring her in for a kiss.

AN: Welp here it is - let me know what you think! And as always, thank you for your love and support 🤍

[youremyheaven]

Saturnian Women: Bad Girls to Trad Girls? 👀😲👩‍🏫

Saturn is the planet of discipline, restriction and rules. Saturn is considered a "strict teacher" who uses discipline, difficulties, delay, duties, dealings, and denials at times to ensure that the student really imbibes their lessons.

There has been much discourse lately on Saturn mahadashas and tbh, I would say to not worry about it too much. Saturn punishes but it also rewards, so if you stay true to its teachings, i.e, keep your head down, do the work and stay firm but humble, Saturn will give you success in proportion to your efforts.

Jennie, Vishaka Moon, finished her 19yr Saturn mahadasha in 2019 and you can clearly see the many themes of Saturn that played out in her life. She spent 5yr living overseas by herself as a child with another family (Saturn deprives you, to some extent, of your family's love and support) and after she moved back to Seoul, she began living at the YG dorm and trained for 5 years and 11 months, which is one of the longest training periods among popular idols today. She has talked about how she's never lived at home or had the experience of living with her family until she was 18-19 and she's always sounded bittersweet about it but all her hard work paid off. Today she's the face of K-pop, one of the most successful idols of all time, an icon and an it girl. She gets torrential amounts of hate over her "attitude" for the supposed partiality that YG had towards her and yes for being "lazy". This is Saturn's harsh energies coming through. Are Jennie's performances lacking from time to time? Yes but is she the only idol whose performances feel meh/"lazy"? No. Is she the only one who gets brutally called out for it? Largely, yes. Saturn does not allow you to get away with your skimping and most definitely does not let you take shortcuts.

The reason most people suffer during this mahadasha is because its human nature to want instant gratification and choose the "easier" option. But yk who does not like that? SATURN. This planet is all about being principled and doing things the "right way". You cannot do something immoral and expect to get away with it during this mahadasha but another thing about Saturn's influence is that it often makes natives deliberately "rebel" or step out of line because they internally crave punishment and want to be disciplined. Think of Saturn like the dom in a BDSM relationship and yourself as the bratty sub who's always asking to be punished. Its kinda like that. I've noticed this with many Saturnians as well as people experiencing Saturn dashas, they have no intention of being "bad" or doing the "wrong things" but they do anyway?? because they want Saturn to discipline them and put them in their place. Often times these natives choose the "harder" path subconsciously by forgoing many chances to choose from other options. They really want to prove themselves "worthy" and "deserving", sometimes to their own detriment.

Karina from Aespa, Punarvasu Moon is also currently undergoing her Saturn mahadasha and so is Wonyoung, Purvabhadrapada Moon (they'll both finish their Saturn mahadashas at around the same ish period of 2031-2032). They're both incredibly successful so if you're experiencing this dasha, dw about Saturn depriving you of success bc its not true. You just have to work hard.

Wonyoung started training at 12yrs of age when she was a few years into her Saturn MD and Karina also started training during her Saturn MD (she was 16 tho). They both spent yearsss training and became massively popular upon their debut (Saturn rewarding hard work) but often got unwarranted hate for absolutely nothing because Saturn "punishes" you to keep you humble in the face of massive success. With Wonyoung, I feel like her Magha Sun (leo rashi) works in her detriment in this dasha because she can be very self indulgent, come across as pompous or bratty or arrogant and Saturn does not like those things 😬with Karina, she received hate initially but things were cleared up and it was understood that those rumours of her being a highschool bully were fabricated along with those fake screenshots and some of her old classmates spoke up about her virtuous character and how kind and sweet she actually was. This is again, Saturn's karma coming thru. Good karma will help you out of tough places in life. Karina has kept her head down and worked hard, people criticized her initially for being a bad dancer but now she's known for her stage presence and x factor.

She's now known for her kind, humble and goofy personality because that is who she really is. Saturn rewards those who remain down to earth and humble and all the love Karina receives now (she is the most followed 4th gen female kpop idol surpassing Wonyoung in less than a year) is part of Saturn's rewards. However, she still faces challenges, like with her dating scandal or with her Chinese boycott last year but again, its her willingness to stay focused and power through that has helped her navigate those situations with grace. She hasn't been dragged the way Jennie or Wonyoung has been. I also think her having Mercury & Venus in UBP (a Saturn ruled nak) has helped her embrace Saturnian principles easier than the other two but she also does have a debilitated Saturn so ://

I think Jennie has had it especially tough because she's Uttarashada Sun and Sun & Saturn are enemies so she's struggled to be as grounded and docile as Saturn wants its natives to be.

If you think about it, there is a reason why all the Kpop it girls have Jupiter ruled Moon and experience Saturn mahadasha at the height of their fame. For starters, the Korean music industry is very "restrictive" in nature and idols are very tightly monitored and controlled (all Saturnian themes) and those who thrive the most in this system are Jupitereans who are undergoing their Saturn MD. They learn to channel the expansiveness of Jupiter through the restrictions of Saturn. Think about how Jennie, Wonyoung and Karina have all been deprived of creative freedom, how their labels pick and choose their endorsements and limit their interactions and in general, despite being young, rich and famous, they live like blue collar workers in some ways?? This is all Saturn's effects. It makes you work hard, rewards you for it but does not let you indulge too much in it.

There is a reason why Jupiter moon is soooo common among popstars. Performing in front of packed stadiums with 50,000 fans is an experience only few get to have in this world and to get that, you have to toil day and night through punishing schedules and constant travel where you dont enjoy yourself materially. This is a very blatant manifestation of Saturn restricting pleasure and enjoyment. (Jupiter ruled Moon natives experience Jupiter dashas first and then its followed by Saturn mahadasha, so usually at their peak, they're undergoing their Saturn MD)

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Now, I want to mention something Claire Nakti mentioned in her Saturn men video, she said that Saturnian men are often extremely rebellious when they're younger and deliberately "act out" because they crave the punishment and discipline that Saturn imposes on them. They subconsciously want to be put in their place. This sounds hella masochistic but I think its helpful to think of it in terms of BDSM dynamics (dont laugh lmao). To an average person, its confusing as to why someone would want to be spanked or tied up or hurt or be in "pain" or be submissive but some people genuinely derive pleasure from being in that position, that's what's fun for them. They "ask for punishment" bc they enjoy being "punished". I dont want to say Saturnian individuals are kinky masochists who deliberately do things that will lead to terrible consequences and harsh punishment but tbh, there is no other explanation for their behaviour. I suggest watching Claire's video where she cites manyyy examples of Saturnian men "acting out".

In Claire Nakti's video about Saturnian women, she mentions how these women are more at ease with following traditions and submitting to them than others because they find it 'freeing' to obey.

But tbh, although women internalise their qualities more in general, I think Saturnian women are just as likely to have an "unruly/rebellious phase" before they embrace the rule abiding nature of Saturn because the truth is limitations are what gives us true freedom. Saturn teaches us that if you have "too much", you can feel confused and lost. it's more important to have "enough".

Hwasa, Pushya Sun

Hwasa is a great example of Saturnian natives and their need to both rebel and conform. Hwasa belongs to the group Mamamoo and although they're all talented, they weren't as successful as other Kpop groups in the mid to late 2010s, esp since they also came from a smaller company. In 2018 at the MAMA awards, she performed in this red latex bodysuit and went instantly viral and her performance became vvv controversial since its practically unheard of for a kpop idol to reveal this much skin or put on a performance that is very sexually provocative. she received a LOT of flak for it, people bodyshamed her, slut shamed her etc but this also brought a lot of attention to her and her group and people started taking more notice of them.

Hwasa was on the cover of Cosmopolitan later that year (you have to be a pretty big deal to land mag covers in Korea esp when you have sooo much competition from sooo many idols/actors etc, Hwasa was up until then just an idol from a smaller company whom others often criticized for not being "pretty enough").

Hwasa continued to "rebel" by posing semi nude, appearing on the cover in what Koreans considered "immodest" clothing etc. But some of the criticism subsided bc as more and more people discovered her music, her talent as a singer and performer stood out so they started praising her for her talent & hard work (Saturn rewarding hard work).

she continued to receive a lot of flak for her outfit choices and Hwasa it seemed was almost hell bent on pissing Koreans off by doing exactly those things that they shunned. She was criticized for this look as her bra is visible through a sheer top and what did she do next?

she went to the airport in a white top and no bra 😂😂needless to say K-netizens were PISSED OFF. but at the same time she started making appearances on variety shows where she gained praise for her humility and lack of pretence. (Saturn punishes but rewards)

this is an excerpt from her 2020 interview with Cosmo (the Cosmo cover above is from her 2019 cover), here we can see Hwasa admitting that "one year ago I was more daring because I felt like I had to be that way no matter what" which reflects on how many Saturnians are rebels without a cause. She then says that "As I go on, I feel like I'm being more strict with myself" showing the progression from the rebellious, unruly phase to one that embraces strictness and discipline. This does not mean becoming a doormat, it means you become more gentle and patient. Its through suffering (which Saturn def brings about) that we learn grace.

I think Hwasa has described it well.

Saturn is considered the most aggressive and cruel in Indian astrology. It symbolizes karma and rewards or punishes based on one's deeds.

Selena Gomez, Pushya Stellium (including Sun & Rising)

When her Revival album came out in 2015, Selena was 23 and trying her best to shed her Disney girl image. So she did what most child star turned popstars do, she posed nude. This was very out of character for a girl who wore a purity ring until she was 18 years old and was generally perceived as the "sweet innocent" one among all Disney stars.

During a roundtable interview in 2022, she said

"I actually did an album cover and I was really ashamed after I did it," Gomez said. "I had to work through those feelings because I realized it was attached to something deeper that was going on. And it was a choice that I wasn't necessarily happy that I made, but I think that I've done my best, at least I try to be myself. And I'm not an overly sexual person, sometimes I like to feel sexy, but that doesn't mean it's for somebody else. It can be for me. Now I understand that there are certain boundaries that I need to set for myself, and I respect and adore so many people, but I’ve got to do what’s best for me."

Obviously the need to "rebel" against her Disney sweetheart image was imbedded in her by the people who work with her, like her management team but Saturn's most powerful tool is regret. You do things without much thought or act out or act rebelliously and through regret or after suffering its consequences, you learn to draw boundaries and impose limitations upon yourself. Just because you can do certain things does not mean you should do them. Saturn teaches us this by limiting freedom.

Miley Cyrus, Anuradha Sun & Mercury

We cannot talk about Disney stars gone wild without mentioning Miley lol

She was the biggest Disney girl of her time and worked vvv hard, doing world tours starting from her early teens and then filming the show, girlie basically never had a minute to spare. Once the show was up, she was in a hurry to shed her Disney image and lets just say... she embodied Saturnian rebelliousness to its extreme.

Miley lost her virginity to Liam when she was 16 and by the time she was 19, she was engaged to get married to the only guy she ever seriously dated. She definitely was embracing "tradition" etc so her "rebel" era was a sharp left turn. She went from being a teen bride to twerking in nude latex on stage. For the next couple of years, Miley smoked weed, embraced a hip-hop sound, wore little clothing and "rebelled". Her rebel era marked the end of her relationship with Liam and interestingly enough, the end of her rebel era was marked by her renewed relationship with Liam.

She entered her soft girl era and started to shed her "rebellious image" and found balance

“I carried some guilt and shame around myself for years because of how much controversy and upset I really caused,” she says. “Now that I’m an adult, I realise how harshly I was judged. I was harshly judged as a child by adults and now, as an adult, I realise that I would never harshly judge a child.”- Miley said in her British Vogue interview

Miranda Kerr, Pushya Rising

If you watch her interviews from the late 2000s and early 2010s, she's super flirty and now she's more mature and ladylike which is kind of a superficial evolution of Saturnian influence.

Miranda is rumoured to have been the world's most expensive yacht girl at one point in time. She accepted $8.1 million worth of jewellery from fraud Malaysian billionaire Jho Low. All these gifts were seized by the government later on bc Saturn does not let you keep things you obtained illegally or in unprincipled ways.

In 2014 during an interview for British GQ (these pics are from the shoot) Miranda said:

"The older I get, the more confident I am about asking for things I enjoy," she said. "One thing I've noticed is now that I'm having less sex my body isn't as toned. The more sex I have, the more defined my arms and stomach get. Orlando and I always had great chemistry. One-night stands aren't my thing. I made Orlando wait for six months until I even kissed him… I always ask for a critique on my performance. I always want to better myself in every way."

She also said,

"Let's put it this way, I've had an orgasm in the air before. Alone. And together." 😲😲

This is sooo remarkably TMI for a woman who now presents herself as so poised and ladylike??

After she started dating her now husband Evan Spiegel, CEO of Snapchat, they remained celibate for the 2years they dated prior to marriage and Miranda said they're "very traditional".

Interviews of Miranda now make her sound like one of those femininity coaches on YouTube.

"My grandma taught me that men are visual and you need to make a little effort," the model said in an interview with The Edit. "So when [Evan] comes home, I make sure to have a nice dress on and the candles lit. We make time to have a nice dinner together. At work, I'm like, 'We need to do this!' and, 'This needs to happen!' But at home, I slip into my feminine and empower Evan to be in his masculine."

In another interview, she said:

"Don't feel like you have to do and be everything. Let the man do some things for you, because if he cares for you, he will want to. When I get home, I'm not the boss like I am at work — I slip into a more feminine role. I take everything off and put on my Stella McCartney silk robe. I'll put on a red lip or red nails, and it lifts my mood. Sexy underwear also gives you a spark. I collect underwear from my travels. Lace, lingerie, bodysuits ... they're like souvenirs."

And in yet another interview, she said:

"He would rather me hug him than give him foot massages. He's like, 'Can you just come and cuddle up? Can we just snuggle? I don't need a foot massage.' I'm like, 'Come on, it's good for you!' … He's very loving like that. I'm a very lucky girl."

She went from being a "rebel" to living like a trad wife.

Eva Mendes, Pushya Moon

She's yet another Saturnian who had a rebellious early career ("rebellious" for a woman basically means capitalizing on your sex appeal) and then embraced a more "traditional" life.

In 2020, she said:

"You can’t do sweatpants,” she said on Extra while promoting her makeup line, Circa. “Ladies, number one cause of divorce in America, sweatpants, no!” 

This is again an example of a "femininity" minded person who thinks women have to "ladylike" (Saturn embracing traditional gender roles).

She took a 10yr break from acting to focus on being a mother and said that if she returns to acting she wont do "violence" or "sexuality" which she did do prior to her marriage and motherhood. She also got married later in life and had this to say:

“When I was 40, it was a big deal for people when I was pregnant, and it wasn’t for me,” Mendes said. “And then I was 42 and I was pregnant with my second one and people were like, ‘Oh my God, you’re going to be so tired. That’s why people have kids in their 20s.’ I was like, that’s the most sorry, asinine thing I’ve ever heard.”

She continued, explaining of parenting, “It takes more patience. In my 20s, I shouldn’t have even been around a child. I was just foul-mouthed and smoking. I could not have raised kids in any other era of my life but now, for sure.”

She's indirectly referring to a more "rebellious" phase of her life and how now she has the patience to be a mom. one thing Saturn teaches you is patience, thats for sureee.

Saturn influence also causes delayed marriage.

Madhuri Dixit, Pushya Moon was 32 years old when she got married (in 90s India this was ancient and not as "normal" as it is now).

Salma Hayek, UBP Moon

there isn't enough dirt on Salma to show that she had some "bad girl" past to move beyond but she struggled for many many years. her life really exemplifies the delayed success of Saturn bc saturn truly rewards patience

Rani Mukerji, UBP Moon

She got married when she was 36yrs old and is married to one of the biggest film producers in India.

The themes of Saturn delaying marriage but ultimately pointing to marrying into wealth has been true in the lives of many of these women, including Salma who is married to a billionaire.

Ellen Pompeo- Anuradha Moon

She was 38 when she got married. Another thing I've noticed with many Saturnian women is how they struggle to conceive or have issues with their fertility (usually caused by the delay in marriage as they're older when they become mothers).

Salma has talked about how she struggled with gestational diabetes when she was pregnant and how she wishes she could have had more children. Rani Mukerji has spoken about her struggles with fertility and how she lost her second baby to a miscarriage, 2/3 of Ellen Pompeo's kids were carried by a surrogate.

Monica Bellucci, Pushya Moon

She was 35 when she married Vincent Cassel and had her daughters in her 40s.

Hillary Swank, Pushya Sun

She was 44 when she married her current husband. (She did get married at 23 and was married for 10yrs , which means they separated after her Saturn return)

Jennifer Lopez, Pushya stellium

She married Ben Affleck when she was 53

She was 35 when she married Marc Anthony with whom she has 2 kids and was married to for a decade. All her other marriages were brief and short lived, pointing to how Saturn makes you get rid of anything that isn't "right" for you

Usually whenever Saturnians get married young, they end up getting a divorce. This is a massive generalization and obvs wont apply to every Saturnian but I've seen this with many people, even Miranda Kerr who married Orlando Bloom in her 20s ended up getting divorced after her Saturn return.

Sophie Turner, UBP Moon

Sophie started dating Joe when she was 19 and married him when she was 21 and he was 28. According to rumours she felt really trapped in the marriage and felt like she hadn't experienced much life. She went from being on a TV show for 10yrs and missing out on normal teen experiences to being a wife and a mom. Many have accused Joe of grooming her as well. They've ended up getting a bitter divorce as well.

Mariah Carey, UBP Sun

She was 23 when she married the CEO of her label who was 20yrs older than her. He had known her since she was a teenager 🤮🤢🤢Mariah has, like Sophie described feeling "trapped" in her marriage and how she had "no freedom". Tommy is famously controlling and kept her under lock and key pretty much. He is now married to Mexican pop star Thalia who was once a huge name in Latin music and is now virtually absent from public life. So his tendency to keep his wives locked up wasn't limited to Mariah, I guess.

Mariah divorced Tommy when she was 29 during her Saturn return as well and he made her life hell for the next few years (do not marry and divorce your CEO kids)

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All throughout this post I made mentions of how Saturnians "rebel" and then "embrace tradition" but what is "traditional" isn't always "right". These two things aren't synonymous. Hwasa went against tradition by dressing sexy. Would that be considered scandalous in say, America? No. She went against the tradition of her culture. But it did not make her actions "wrong".

But sometimes this tendency to obey traditions can manifest in more extreme ways and make someone have very right wing esque or conservative views, even.

JK Rowling, Pushya Sun, Saturn in 1h (in Purva bhadrapada)

Rowling was once a beloved author who was known for her highly inspirational rags to riches journey. She became the first writer to become a billionaire. But now, she's known as a transphobe and many of her former friends and allies have distanced themselves from her. Its crazy bc she almost exclusively tweets about trans people and has made it her life's mission to talk about who is a "real" woman and who isn't (Saturn's desire to conform to traditional gender roles) but her transphobic era seems to be her rebellious Saturn phase where she is seeking punishment. It literally makes no sense as to why out of the blue one day she started to tweet and say these things and why she's sooo insistent on her views but its like she's digging her own grave.

Saturnians often do bizarre things that seem like obviously bad ideas to others and suffer terrible consequences for it because they crave Saturn's harshness. She could've never written another book after Harry Potter, fucked off into oblivion with all her money and farmed strawberries for the rest of her life with her legacy intact but Saturn has stripped her of it. I wont be surprised if in another 10yrs or something, she comes forward to talk about how embarrassed and ashamed she is of whatever she's doing now as this is also a pattern among Saturnians to feel guilt and remorse for their past and apologize for it.

Oprah Winfrey- Anuradha Moon

Oprah hasn't been fully exposed and cancelled yet but I hope she gets what Ellen got because she's such a vile, toxic hateful person.

Oprah has a long history of platforming some incredibly toxic people, leading to a lot of pain and suffering. The relevant one right now is Dr. Oz who used his Oprah-given influence to sell scam miracle cures and other supplements.

Worse (in my opinion) is Dr. Phil, who has used his Oprah-provided stage to send children to “reform schools” in exchange for kickbacks. Many (included the infamous catch me outside girl) have claimed that these institutions are hot beds of physical and sexual abuse. There are also allegations that Dr. Phil actively aims to make guests on his show appear less well adjusted so that he can yell at them. Famously, a winner of the show survivor who was struggling with alcoholism claimed that Dr. Phil’s staff gave him a bottle of vodka to drink before the show so that he would be drunk and look like shit to justify Dr. Phil berating him.

Oprah also dedicated two shows to a man known as John of God, heavily implying that he may actually be able to heal sickness through faith in God. He was, obviously, a grifter who would perform dangerous surgical procedures (and would cut people’s eyes with sharp objects) on people without a license. He was also a serial rapist, and several women have claimed they traveled across the world to meet John of God due to Oprah’s show only to be raped.

This example is more fitting of the traits I explored in part 1 of my Saturn dominance post where I talked about how many Saturnians seem to be scammers and liars.

Grimes, UBP Sun

for an edgy alternative indie artist, Grimes has surprisngly trad views

In one interview, she said:

"I kind of like the patriarchy, I like the supply chain, food, Uber, roads... umm, civilization, you know there's a lot of good things that came from it. I think it's sort of oppressive and overly dominant, and if you don't include women in things they can easily become toxic, you know."

she was married to elon musk so im not too surprised that her worldviews are...weird... (she likes the patriarchy bc it gave her uber,,, gotcha...lol)

Sometimes honestly, esp in today's world where everybody has more social freedom esp in America and can do whatever they want, a lot of people "rebel" by embracing tradition. Grimes is actually deploying Saturn's need to rebel against the order by peddling her faux trad views.

The current tradfem movement (that I predicted 2 years ago😌) is a reflection of how each generation rebels differently. You give someone a lot of freedom and they do whatever they want with it but soon enough fatigue sets in and you desperately crave structure and order, so you discipline yourself and restrict yourself. in an era where dating has become so toxic and loveless, a section of society embraces a 1950s type tradwife lifestyle to go against the norm.

there will be a part 3 that expands on Saturn's manifestations further but this is it for this post<333 tysm for reading<33

[lilbitdepressed27]

Tara Carpenter/Fem!Reader

Summary: Cast Away AU

Warnings: angst

WC: 4.0k

Author's Note: hope you guys enjoy

"Mmh."

The sensation of light kisses being placed on your neck was what brought you out of your slumber. Opening one of your eyes to see your beautiful girlfriend leaning over you.

"Tara. It's too early." You groaned into your pillow. A weight on your lower back. You didn't mind the sudden weight. 

"Come baby. Wake up. I want to spend some more time with you before you leave." Her lips were close to your ear. Her warm breath sending you chills throughout your body. The warmth of her body on your bare back. Kisses being placed on your shoulder. You could feel her smiling as she placed kisses on you.

The sound of the storm raging on pulled you out of your thoughts. The wind hollowing as you tried your best to stay dry. But it was no use. The deflated raft doing little to keep you dry. The dreading realization that you were stuck on this island by yourself setting in.

You never really thought how dark the open ocean was. That you could only see when the lighting strikes lit up the sky. It was terrifying. You were scared. Scared and alone.

*

You weren't sure how long it's been since the plane crashed. You and tried to keep track of the days. Tried to keep sane, to keep your hopes high. Hope that you'd be rescued. But it had been hard. By the time the first month passed. Your hopes had come crashing down.

A month into trying to survive on a deserted island. You had come to realize that you were the only one on the island. No signs of people or animals on the island. There wasn't even any birds on the island. Which scared a you quite a bit. You never would have thought or even imagined you'd be in a situation like this. Your mind going strong to the show named Lost.

You prayed to what ever higher power that, that wasn't the case.

Hunting for fish had been hard. You had experience finishing and you were good at it. But that had been with fishing equipment and here you didn't have any equipment. Making fishing harder. Using what you could find from wreckage of the plane that washed up in the beach. Some luggage, parts from the plane, using everything you could get your hands on to help you in any way.

All you wanted was to see your girlfriend again. Your friends. Your family.

*

"How about we just spend the day together by ourselves?" You asked as you watched your girlfriend get ready for the small party. Since you were leaving for Christmas break to visit family, your friends decided to throw you a party. Spending the Christmas break with your family overseas. You had asked if Tara wanted to go with you but her sister was coming home from college and she wanted to spend some time with her older sister. Which you understood. It wouldn't be long till you, Tara and your friends headed back to college as well.

"Come on. You know they wanna see you before you go." Tara turned away from the mirror after putting on her ear rings. A knowing smile on her face as she looked at you. "Plus, we will have plenty of time alone before you leave." Placing her hands on your upper thighs giving them a squeeze. That really made you want to ditch the party.

"Tease." You mumbled as she giggled and pulled away.

"Seriously let's go before we're late."

*

You were tired, cold. Catching fish had been hard but you had gotten good at it. You were able to use the the deflated raft to collect water when it rained. It had been a great help so far. Using the coconuts you found to fill them like water bottles.

It was hard, you had lost so much weight so fast. With coconut water, sometimes rain water, rarely the fish you caught. It was not enough. You were lucky none of the wounds you had caught any infection. Building a fire was a lot harder. Thankfully you remembered some of the tips from a YouTuber you watched. Making the fire took time and a whole lot patience.

You were sure you were going crazy. Talking to the picture of your girlfriend that had been in your pocket watch that had been safely in your pocket. "You wouldn't happen to have any matches, would you?" You had cursed your self, you were not going to lose your mind. You refused.

But it was so lonely. You weren't sure when you last spoke. It felt like months had passed since the plane crash.

How long were you really going to last?

*

You laid on your bed with Tara on your chest. Her hand playing with your own on your stomach. Your palm on hers. You had been focused on the movie when you heard her giggle, the giggle taking your attention away from the movie.

"What?"

"Your hands make mine look so tiny."

You looked at your joined hands, seeing the difference in size. You let out a small laugh before you interlocked her fingers with yours. Bringing her fist up to your lips.

"I love your hands. They're so soft and just perfect to hold." She mumbled into your cheek before placing a kiss on said cheek.

*

Your hands were rough now. All the hard work you had to do with your bare hands. Nothing about your hands were soft now.

You had found a cave, one where you had moved all your things to. It was a nice shelter from the rain and storm. The fire you made helped you stay warm in the cave. The walls of the cave were filled the drawings. Ranging from the plane and the map of the world. You had tried to figure out where were you. Then there were drawings of your family, friends. Tara.

You wondered what she was doing at this very moment. You wondered if she liked the Christmas present you got her. It was a beautiful gold necklace one with her initials and yours. In a way you both had thought of the same thing when it came down to getting each other a present.

You had hoped she liked the present, what you would given to see her reaction.

*

"I got you something."

You were at the airport waiting for your flight to be called. The two weeks would go by so slowly without Tara by your side. Your flight wouldn't be called till another thirty minutes. She was holding a small wrapped box.

You took the small box, thanking her with a kiss. "Thank you baby. My gift is under Sam's tree cause I knew you would open it as soon as I leave." You laughed as she pushed you away but she had laughed as well. Knowing you had a point.

"Come on open it. I wanna see your reaction." The excitement in her eyes was so strong and you just couldn't help your smile to grow. So with the same excitement you carefully unwrapped the box. Jaw dropping once you saw what was in the box.

A gold pocket watch. You had one but it had broken and it was unfixable. You took the pocket watch out of the box. Seeing the your initials and Tara's on the top of the lid. A now gentle smile when you saw a picture of the woman you love when you opened it. A picture of Tara was inside. She was in her light pink jacket, her hands in the pocket of the jacket, a dimpled smile on her face as her head was slightly tilted to the side. Posing for the picture that you had taken. It was your favorite picture, although you had loads of pictures of Tara. It was your locksreen.

"Do you like it? They asked me if I wanted to add a picture and well I thought you'd like one of me. If you don't-I love it Tara. Thank you." You leaned over pecking her lips. She was quick to pull you back in by cupping your cheeks.

"Flight 180 to San Juan Argentina is now boarding." The hold Tara had on you tightened. A part of you (a huge part) didn't want to go. Yes your family was taking a vacation to Argentina. And you would absolutely love to explore that beautiful place. But you wanted Tara by your side. You knew Tara had her own family here so she had stayed.

So with one last hug and kiss. That felt like it didn't last long enough. Tara had loosened her hold on you letting you board your flight.

*

It had been too long now. Three and half years. Three years since you last saw Tara. Three years since you last saw your family. Three years since the plane crashed. Three years since you've been alone. No one was going to find you. You had accepted that now.

You would have been in college now. Starting your fourth year. You had only been able to finish one semester. Every time you thought about all the what ifs, it really made you depressed.

"I have it down. If I'm right. The wind is pushing north. Which means if we get the raft we built in the water the wind can help it push through the wave break." You spoke to the picture on the pocket watch. The picture was now a bit more faded now. You tried your best to keep it safe and dry.

"I know, I know. Be careful. But I am not dying on this island. If I stay here and let this chance pass. I don't think I'll last much longer." You've spent the past few weeks building the raft. You had found a part of a porta potty wash up on to the shore. You knew it could hopefully help the raft move with the wind.

"Enough coconuts to last me long enough. Some empty ones to collect water when I'm out there."

You turned your gaze back to ocean. You were either going to die out in the ocean and be eaten by birds or drown to the bottom of the dark ocean. But you were sure, positive that you were not going to die on this island.

"I'm not dying here."

*

The older woman had been so, so in doubt. She was back home along with her kids and husband. The nauseating and heartbreaking news that she just received. It was hard to believe. Her heart telling her it wasn't true. Refusing to accept what the police told her. They only looked for two months.

You couldn't be gone. Not her little girl.

Upon arriving to her house, her eyes filled with more tears. Seeing your girlfriend and your friends. Their hopeful faces. The moment she stepped out of the car. She knew that they knew based off her expressions. The cry that Tara had let out was enough for her to burst into tears as well. Her own cry being muffled by her husband's chest as he tried his best to keep his own emotions under control.

You were gone.

And they didn't even have a body to bury.

*

"Hello am I speaking to Mrs.Y/LN?"

"Yes this is she. May I ask who's speaking?"

"Hello ma'am I'm Detective Chen, I'm here to tell you that we found your daughter. Y/n Y/ln."

*

For the first time in three and half years. You were freshly cleaned, the nice older nurse offered to cut your hair. And you were thankful for that. With you being so clean you saw scars and cuts you didn't even know you had. Bruises all over your body. Severally sun burnt. A part of you felt weak. Doctor said that was normal due to how long you went without any nutrients.

Now you were waiting. Waiting for your family to get there. You had been asleep for quite a while.

"Y/n?"

At the sound of your mother's voice you looked away from the wall you were staring blankly at. Your emotions finally bursting. Your arms reaching out for the woman that gave you birth. The woman who loved you unconditionally. Her own cry being let out as she rushed to your side.

"Oh my baby. My little girl." The warmth that she brought was one of the things that you missed. Soon your dad and older sister joined the hug. The three of them holding you tight.

*

The flight home was long. Your sister filling you in on what was happening. Since you technically were pronounced dead, Tara had moved away. Your sister telling you that along with your friend group they all moved to New York. They no longer lived in Woodsboro.

"Oh and Y/n. They don't know. We haven't really been in contact with them. Tara's also..." She wasn't sure if she should tell you. But she knew you deserved to know. "Tara's with some guy now. They started dating about a month ago now. I think. From what I've seen." She remembers seeing the post online. Mindy had shared a video and in the video Mindy had mentioned how Tara and a guy named Frankie were dating.

You sat back in your seat. Your shoulders slumping as you looked down at the pocket watch. The hope had you since you had been rescued had dwindled down. Tara moved on. She moved on from you.

*

You weren't sure what to do. It's only been three days since you got back. Spending the past days in bed. Your mom refusing to let you out of her sight. You didn't blame her. You missed being under her care. Your room had been just how you left it. The pictures of you and Tara still hanging on the wall. You couldn't bring yourself to call her.

If she moved on, did you really want to bug her. Ruin her chance to fall in love again. Could you let her go?

You had to. It wasn't you choice to make.

*

Walking in shoes had been such a small thing you had missed. Not worrying about stepping on something sharp or hard had been such wonderful thing. You had beg your mom to let you walk. Being cooped up in the house had become a bit much.

One of the first things your dad did when he brought you back was going to the town cemetery and having your tombstone removed. You still saw it though. It was weird to see.

Being back home has been something you had fantasized. Now be actually home felt so unreal. You were afraid that you'd wake up from this dream and be back on that island.

"Y/n?"

You turned your gaze from the pond. You had been walking for quite a while before stopping at the towns pond and setting on the bench. Staring blankly at the pond. Since coming back, a part of you still felt like it was on island. You felt off being back.

Standing there was a shocked Christina Carpenter. "Oh hello Ms.Carpenter." The older woman took you in. You looked different, your face skinner, bruises and cuts on your face. When she heard about how you were found in the ocean. She didn't believe it. She remembered how devastated her youngest daughter was. You had been pronounced dead after the search party gave up after two months of searching. But here you were.

Her heart breaking at the empty, broken look in your eyes. You looked so lost. A completely different person from what she had grown to love for her daughter. "You're alive."

"...yea. Uh how have you been Ms.Carpenter?" The older woman hadn't changed much in the past three years and a half.

"Does Tara know?" She ignored the question you asked. At the look of your guilt face looking down, she knew the answer. Feeling a bit angry at that, remembering how much Tara suffered when you went missing. How many asthma attacks Tara suffered, remembering all the times she had found Tara in the middle of those asthma attacks. She held off on reacting on that anger when she saw your eyes. The tears. The confusion, the heartache.

"No. I wanted to call her. But my sister said that she's with someone. I didn't want to...she's moved on Ms.Carpenter. I feel guilty about that if I call her I'll cause her pain, confusion or...I don't know. I don't know what to do." The tears finally escaped your eyes. The love you had for Tara had grown stronger and bigger while you were away. To be back and not have her by your side had you feeling just as lost as you felt on that island.

*

"Hey mom." Her two daughters walked through the door. One of her daughters being accompanied by a tall man. They were home for thanksgiving break.

"My girls." Pulling both of her girls into a hug. The pocket watch felt heavy in her pocket. You had been playing with the pocket watch through out the whole conversation she had with you two days ago. She had convinced you to lend her it, so she can get it fixed. She had seen your hesitation, before you gently placed it on her open palm.

"Who's this?" The young man moved from behind one of his daughters, his hand grazing against her daughter's hand.

"Hello Ms.Carpenter I'm Danny. Sam's boyfriend."

Feeling her shoulders lose their tension she smiled and shook the boys hand. She knew Danny. She had spoken with Sam about the boy that she's been dating for a few months now. It was only now that she actually met the boy in person. Looking back at Tara who looked better than before but she knew her daughter. Her dark brown eyes still held so much loss. Pain. Yearning.

"Tara's where's what's his face? That boy you're dating."

Tara shook her head with a small laugh. "Mom for the last time, I went on one date with him and that's it. I'm not dating him. So you don't have to remember his name. I don't like him, not even a little bit and I'm not ready for a relationship." Tara couldn't bare the thought of loving someone like she loved you. Her love was only for one person.

Mindy had told her that it wasn't healthy to hold on. That she was only hurting herself. She knew Mindy was only trying to be helpful but she couldn't move on. Not from you. You were-are her soulmate. Her one true love. She's never met someone who made her feel that you had. If it wasn't you, then it was no one. She only ever saw a future with you. She had planned a future with you.

There was no one else she wanted to be with. People can call in denial all they wanted. She didn't care.

"Girls. There's something I need to tell you." She had planned this conversation in her head. She even wrote some things down. But now her mind was blank at actually having this conversation with her girls.

The girls sat down as Danny offered to take their things to their room. With Sam's directions of where her room was at he left up stairs. So with out saying she held out her hand to Tara.

Tara confused stuck out her hand, her palm open, her throat hitch in her throat when she felt the familiar cold metal on her palm. Her eyes misting with tears when she saw the same pocket watch. The engravings of your initials and hers on the top of the lid. The gold was scratched and obviously damaged but it still opened. There was her picture. Faded.

"How. How did you get this?" She wanted to cry. But the spark of hope flamed brighter than it ever had the past three years and a half.

"Tara, a cargo ship found her somewhere in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean. She's alive."

The words echoed in her head. The words she had dreamed of every single day to hear. She was finally hearing. But it didn't feel real. It felt like a dream. She didn't let her sister or her mother say anything else before she bolted out of the house. Ignoring the shouts of her mother and sister.

*

You had gotten out of the shower. Changing into some sweats and that hung loosely. You were still a bit too skinny. Your old clothes fitting you loose. Your sports bra was bought new. A size or two smaller than normal. Your cuts were a bit more healed. The scar you had on your palm was something you'll always remember. You had fading bruises. You were healing. Slowly but surely.

Stepping out of the bathroom connected to your at the same moment your room door was pushed open. Standing there was the woman that kept you alive. The woman that you dreamed of seeing every single day that you were on that island.

"Y/n?"

Her voice, it was like you were hearing it for the first time. She was beautiful as ever. Seeing her only few feet away from you.

"Tara."

It was all she needed to hear to cross the room. Crashing into you in a tight hug. Her grip hurt but you didn't care. Cause you hugged her just as tight as she cried into your chest. The ache, the emptiness you felt before it was forgotten the moment you had Tara in your arms. She refused to let you go. Refusing to unwrap her arms around your bare waist.

Her heart broke at how skinny you had become. She couldn't imagine what you weren't through. All the scars and bruises you had all over your body. She pulled away to look up at you. Your eyes were also wet from crying. But they held so much more. Her hand coming up to cup your cheek. You leaned into her palm eyes closing.

"I missed you so much."

"I'm sorry."

"You have nothing to be sorry for. I'm just so happy you're here now." Her hands never left your body. Although she was a bit peeved that no one told her the exact moment you were found. The question was, why didn't you call her.

By the way she was looking at you, you could guess what she was thinking. "It was three years, almost four. I wasn't sure if...if you know I didn't know if...I saw the post Mindy posted and I thought you were moving on. I didn't want to, I don't know bug you?" You finally pulled your gaze away from those brown eyes that read you so well. You now felt unworthy of Tara's love. You weren't the same and you for sure didn't look the same.

Tara watched the way you shrunk in on your self. She knew you too well. She knew you since you both were toddlers. When you wanted to cry, you would blink more than usual, you avoid eye contact. That time you fell off a roof and had a nasty scar on your leg, you had refused to wear any shorts. She later found out that it was cause you felt self conscious about the scar.

She watched as you pulled away from her and put on a shirt. "Y/n, I still love you. I loved you then and I love you now. Nothings changed. I'm not dating anyone. I haven't dated anyone since—Mindy is an idiot. You know that. The only person I've ever loved and still love is you." Her hand gripped yours. How she missed holding your hands.

With her other hand she gently took your chin and made you look at her. "I love you."

Her eyes held so much honestly and love. Making you want to cry, you wanted to know what you did to deserve someone like Tara. Her compassion, her love, her loyalty.

"I love you to."

The night was spent with you in Tara's arms. She had dreamed of you being in her arms, and now thankfully it had come true. You were back, you were back in her arms.

Safe and sound.

:)