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pseudowho · 11 months ago

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Hi Mrs Haitch! First let me say that I adore your stories and the way you write the men in your fics. Not only are they hot and enjoyable to read but also they feel real and adult. I don't want to bash on anyone by saying this, but sometimes it's difficult to enjoy fics written by younger people when you're pushing 30 because they portray a different reality. Please, never stop writing!

Before getting into the next part of the ask I'd like to say that this is in no way a demand and I it's not my intention to trauma dump on you. I just felt like talking a little about my experience could provide a bit of context.

I just read the ask about the soft spot and, although I'm not a virgin, I'm a serial victim of bad sex. I would love technical (even if explicit) descriptions on how to find the famed spot. I think is really cool when women in the medical field talk about sexual health, and it could be good having this kind of knowledge on a famous fic blog like yours, since I imagine a lot of fic readers are either virgins or had less than ideal sexual experiences, like me.

I don't want to seem like I'm pressuring you though! I totally understand if you prefer to keep this kind of thing out of your blog. It's just that a while ago I read on another blog from a healthcare professional a post about how sex shouldn't hurt even in the first time and I was blown away (this happened years after I started having sex and after having deemed myself "defective" and doomed to painful sex to the rest of my life)

Sorry for the long ask. Sending lots of hapiness your way <3

Well, if it helps even one person, it is absolutely my pleasure to do so.

I'm sorry for your bad sex. Nothing excuses it, frankly, and I'm a firm believer that most people are profoundly shit at giving vagina-owners orgasms.

(you calling my blog 'famous' does not go unnoticed and I could blush. Shhhh.)

I think age comes with so much beauty. I am a staunch believer in the unifying power of people, and when groups of women support the ducklings of the group, the ducklings are far less likely to be led down the garden path, on what is 'normal' or 'abnormal' or 'good' or 'bad' in sex.

This is why men and the media fear strongly-bonded groups of women so much-- it's almost like we'll talk and start to take note of the real problems. Cats amongst pigeons, right?

Anyway...

Cw and tw: medical discussion, discussion of self-examination

So again, while the location of the g-spot varies in exact location from vagina-owner to vagina-owner, on average it is located 2-3 inches into the vagina, on the anterior vaginal wall.

What I mean by anterior vaginal wall is, if standing and facing forwards, it's the wall of your vagina closest to the front of you, rather than your back.

Picture posted again, for reference!

The g-spot is of variable size, usually the size of a large coin, and it may feel a bit rougher or ridged than other parts of your vagina, but becomes spongier or thicker and plusher when aroused or stimulated.

If you were to get two fingers on your dominant hand, reach inside the vagina up to the base of your fingers, and hook forwards, you should find it.

I suggest for the first time, finding it when you need to pee. This is because, the g-spot sits against the urethral canal (the tube you pee out of), and if you have a full bladder, you'll know you've found the g-spot because it will feel really sensitive and likely increase your urge to pee.

If you happen to orgasm with g-spot and clitoral stimulation while you have urine in your bladder, your chances of "squirting" (which, if you see my previous post, is almost certainly just pee) are much higher. It's a unique experience and you should try it. Put a towel down.

I find a good sized wand vibrator, inserted and positioned just-so, will give great continuous g-spot stimulation while you, or someone else, goes to town elsewhere.

Start combining all of the erogenous zones and it's party time.

As said previously, sensitivity is very variable. Exploring and knowing yourself is key to showing a partner how to pleasure you.

If you have sex with a partner who responds with anything other than "teach me" absolute enthusiasm, when you want to show them what works for you...if they 'try' for a short time, then give up? If they carry on doing their own thing anyway? If they're impatient?

Kick them to the curb. They can go fuck themselves.

Very much love as always,

-- Haitch xxx

#pseudowho #pseudowho answers you #Haitch #cw medical #G spot #Soft spot

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catsofcalifornia · 10 months ago

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Cinnamon and Lady Catherine from Feral Cat Foundation in Alamo, California

Click here for more information about adoption and other ways to help!

Click here for a link to Feral Cat Foundation's main website.

Cinnamon and Lady Catherine are a bonded pair of fluffy 7-year-old cats. (Might be siblings; we are not sure.) Theirs is a bit of a hard-luck story, and they have some special needs. They’re looking for that special home to help them blossom, so if you think that might be yours, read on!

Six years ago, the two fluffballs were trapped in a retail parking lot as part of a feral cat fixing program. Both seemed pretty feral at first, but with one needing extra medical care and both being so doggone cute, their rescuer just couldn't bear to return them to the parking lot. She kept them at her home and worked with them, seeing substantial progress over time.

Cinnamon is a cute-as-can-be orange male cat. When he first came to us, his tail was dragging on the ground. It was found to have permanent nerve damage and had to be amputated. He didn’t seem to miss it, and has just a cute little nub on his backside now. Cinnamon has developed a sweet, demure and laid-back personality. He has such a lovable begging face when he wants pets, purrs very loudly and looks so serene when he receives them!

After some time in foster care, Cinnamon was noticed straining to urinate and was found to have bladder stones. He had surgery to remove them, and thereafter was placed on a prescription diet formulated to keep the bladder crystals from recurring and forming into stones. Right now he’s primarily eating Hills S/O dry food. (Increasing the amount of wet food would probably be even better if you can.) At any rate, he’s been maintaining on the diet for several years now, and the bladder issue has not recurred. To check up on him, we had an ultrasound done very recently, and the vet found no signs of additional stones forming. So, it’s a good indication that the diet is working as planned and keeping him healthy. The food is easy to obtain, and while it is a little more expensive than regular cat food, it’s not outrageous.

Lady Catherine is a drop-dead gorgeous calico female and Cinnamon’s best buddy. She is shyer than Cinnamon, and would require a good dose of patience as she settles into a new location. Once she gets to know someone, she can be quite friendly, rubbing coquettishly on the cat tree and hoping for a visit. She does blow a bit hot and cold and sometimes just isn’t in the mood at all. We are sure that with more personalized attention, she would continue to blossom further and really get the chance to live her best life.

For convenience since they are roommates, Lady Catherine has been eating the same food as Cinnamon (it doesn’t hurt for her to eat it, even though she doesn’t require it).

What is so much fun about these two, is watching them interact together. They spend most of their time sitting and cuddling together, or sort of weaving around each other with purrs and nuzzles. It is really sweet to see how much they love each other!

A couple years ago, this pair actually did get adopted. Their new dad adored them but tragically, he passed away unexpectedly, and the family called the rescue to come repossess the cats. They had been blissfully happy in the home, and they do not understand why they had to come back to foster care. From this experience, we know Cinnamon and Catherine would need a quiet home with patient person(s) willing to take it slow. It would probably go best to keep them in one room of the house for a month or possibly a couple months until they acclimate. They would not be a good fit for a home with kids or dogs; they have gotten very accustomed to quiet adults. They do get along great with other cats, but of course there is the food requirement so if there are other cats eating other food in the home, you’d need a method to separate Cinnamon for feeding (which certainly is not impossible and we can talk about strategies for this, if that’s your situation).

Both kitties are about 7 years old at this time. I know most people will think this is too old for a new cat… keep in mind however that with proper care, indoor kitties typically live 15-20 years. Cinnamon and Lady Catherine have a whole “ACT TWO” ahead of them! They are special kitties, and so very deserving of that second chance to live their best life. They have been fixed, brought up to date on vaccinations, and tested FIV/FELV negative. They have always done a great job of using the litterbox! There is an adoption donation to the Feral Cat Foundation (an all-volunteer organization, which helped get them out of a bad situation and provided all of their medical care) to help us continue our work with homeless cats. If you would like to meet this fluffy pair or have any questions, please reach out by phone or email!

#cats #california #alamo #adoption #adoptnotshop

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lost-boy-into-the-upper-heavenly · 1 year ago

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Most people got married in June because they took their yearly bath in May, and they still smelled pretty good by June. Since they were starting to smell, however, brides carried a bouquet of flowers to hide the body odor. Hence the custom today of carrying a bouquet when getting married.

Baths consisted of a big tub filled with hot water. The man of the house had the privilege of the nice clean water, then all the other sons and men, then the women, and finally the children. Last of all the babies. By then the water was so dirty you could actually lose someone in it … hence the saying, “Don’t throw the baby out with the Bath water!”

Houses had thatched roofs-thick straw-piled high, with no wood underneath. It was the only place for animals to get warm, so all the cats and other small animals (mice, bugs) lived in the roof. When it rained it became slippery and sometimes the animals would slip and fall off the roof, resulting in the idiom, “It’s raining cats and dogs.”

There was nothing to stop things from falling into the house. This posed a real problem in the bedroom where bugs and other droppings could mess up your nice clean bed, therefore, a bed with big posts and a sheet hung over the top afforded some protection. That’s how canopy beds came into existence.

The floor was dirt. Only the wealthy had something other than dirt, leading folks to coin the phrase “dirt poor.”

The wealthy had slate floors that would get slippery in the winter when wet, so they spread thresh (straw) on floor to help keep their footing. As the winter wore on, they added more thresh until, when you opened the door, it would all start slipping outside. A piece of wood was placed in the entrance-way, subsequently creating a “thresh hold.”

Sometimes they could obtain pork, which made them feel quite special. When visitors came over, they would hang up their bacon to show off. It was a sign of wealth that a man could, “bring home the bacon.” They would cut off a little to share with guests and would all sit around and “chew the fat.”

Those with money had plates made of pewter. Food with high acid content caused some of the lead to leach onto the food, causing lead poisoning death. This happened most often with tomatoes, so for the next 400 years or so, tomatoes were considered poisonous.

Bread was divided according to status. Workers got the burnt bottom of the loaf, the family got the middle, and guests got the top, or the “upper crust.”

Lead cups were used to drink ale or whisky. The combination would sometimes knock the imbibers out for a couple of days. Someone walking along the road would take them for dead and prepare them for burial.. They were laid out on the kitchen table for a couple of days and the family would gather around and eat and drink and wait and see if they would wake up, creating the custom of holding a wake.

They used to use urine to tan animal skins, so families used to all pee in a pot & then once a day it was taken & sold to the tannery. If you had to do this to survive you were “piss poor.”

But worse than that were the really poor folk who couldn’t even afford to buy a pot; they “didn’t have a pot to piss in” & were the lowest of the low.

The next time you are washing your hands & complain because the water temperature isn’t just how you like it, think about how things used to be. Here are some facts about the 1500s.

England is old and small and the local folks started running out of places to bury people. So they would dig up coffins and would take the bones to a bone-house, and reuse the grave. When reopening these coffins, 1 out of 25 coffins were found to have scratch marks on the inside and they realized they had been burying people alive, so they would tie a string on the wrist of the corpse, lead it through the coffin and up through the ground and tie it to a bell. Someone would have to sit out in the graveyard all night (the graveyard shift.) to listen for the bell; thus, someone could be, saved by the bell or was considered a dead ringer.

And that’s the truth. Now, whoever said History was boring?

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mybeautifulchristianjourney · 10 months ago

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Grain of Salt "Facts"

I don't know if these are true or not but they come from a source I tend to trust. Still, take 'em with a grain of salt and please excuse the word used for urination. The fact just doesn't make sense without it.

People used to use urine to tan animal skins, so families used to all pee in a pot & then once a day it was taken and sold to the tannery…….if you had to do this to survive you were "P*ss Poor". But worse than that were the really poor folk who couldn't even afford to buy a pot……they "didn't have a pot to p*ss in" & were the lowest of the low.

The next time you are washing your hands and complain because the water temperature isn't just how you like it, think about how things used to be. Here are some facts about the old days…

Most people got married in June because they took their yearly bath in May, and they still smelled pretty good by June. However, since they were starting to smell … brides carried a bouquet of flowers to hide the body odor. Hence the custom today of carrying a bouquet when getting married.

Baths consisted of a big tub filled with hot water. The man of the house had the privilege of the nice clean water, then all the other sons and men, then the women and finally the children. Last of all the babies. By then the water was so dirty you could actually lose someone in it … hence the saying, "Don't throw the baby out with the bath water!"

Houses had thatched roofs with thick straw piled high, with no solid roof. The cats and other small animals including mice, bugs lived in the roof to get warm. When it rained it became slippery and sometimes they would slip and fall off the roof … hence the saying "It's raining cats and dogs."

There was also nothing to stop things from falling into the house. This posed a real problem in the bedroom where bugs and droppings could mess up their nice clean bed. Hence, a bed with big posts and a sheet hung over the top afforded some protection. That's how our luxurious “canopy beds” came into existence.

The floor was dirt. Only the wealthy had something other than dirt. Hence the saying, "Dirt poor." The wealthy had slate floors that would get slippery in the winter when wet, so they spread thresh (straw) on floor to help keep their footing. As the winter wore on, they added more thresh until, when you opened the door, it would all start slipping outside. A piece of wood was placed in the entrance-way. Hence: a “thresh hold”.

In those old days, they cooked in the kitchen with a big kettle that always hung over the fire … every day they lit the fire and added things to the pot. They ate mostly vegetables and didn't get much meat. They would eat the stew for dinner, leaving leftovers in the pot to get cold overnight and then start over the next day. Sometimes stew had food in it that had been there for quite a while. Hence the rhyme: “Peas porridge hot, peas porridge cold, peas porridge in the pot nine days old.”

Sometimes they could obtain pork, which made them feel quite special. When visitors came over, they would hang up their bacon to show off. It was a sign of wealth that a man could, "bring home the bacon." They would cut off a little to share with guests and would all sit around and “chew the fat.”

Bread was divided according to status. Workers got the burnt bottom of the loaf, the family got the middle, and guests got the top, or the “upper crust”.

England is old and small and the local folks started running out of places to bury people. So they would dig up coffins and would take the bones to a bone-house, and reuse the grave. When reopening these coffins, 1 out of 25 coffins were found to have scratch marks on the inside and they realized they had been burying people alive … so they would tie a string on the wrist of the corpse, lead it through the coffin and up through the ground and tie it to a bell. Someone would have to sit out in the graveyard all night (the “graveyard shift”) to listen for the bell; thus, someone could be, “saved by the bell” or was considered a “dead ringer”.

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jrpgdog15 · 3 months ago

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i never use this site, or the internet, to dump my feelings out but i've been avoiding actually talking about my feelings with anyone on this because i don't want to bum anyone out and also because i think they'll just tell me what i want to hear. so i don't know. maybe this will be helpful to me.

but my dog, a 60 lb lab mix, is 14 years old (will be 15 in a month) and he is not doing so well. but he's also not doing terribly. he has been on joint supplements for years to help with arthritis but in the last year he has slowed down significantly, especially in the last 6ish months. we used to go out for at least a mile walk daily but now we just go a few houses down and back, mostly just because he'll poop in the house if i don't take him out. he still will poop in the house at least once like 70% of days because i can't tell what his exact schedule is, and he doesn't know he needs to poop until it's happening because he's incontinent. which is mostly okay because i wfh and can quickly clean up any mess, and pee is so much worse than poop. he's only peed in the house a handful of times, and it's mostly because i missed taking him out. he's had a dog door all his life and has always been pretty perfect about using it, but now he sometimes gets stuck going out of it so he mostly avoids it. any time there's an accident in the house it just feels like it's my fault and kinda ruins my mood so that's, a daily thing. our house is 50% carpet and 50% wood and he hasn't been able to get up off the wood for many many months now. we've put many beds, (and tried putting blankets etc down but he just seems to slip on those) and he's smart enough to understand he can only lay on the beds or carpet now, but sometimes his aim when laying down is bad and so he kinda shifts backwards onto the wood when trying to get up. this has resulted in a few times where i come to the rescue and pick him up, but also other times where he keeps trying to get up alone and so he soils himself due to the exertion. we've had 3 really bad times where we've come home from a dinner/event to him, stuck in a corner trying to get up, in his own urine/feces, so then we have to bathe him which he really really hates, and then spend hours cleaning up the area it happening because poop is smushed into small crevices, or the carpet is so soaked. if i didn't wfh i don't know how we would handle this, he would have to be crated all day and would most certainly soil himself so i guess?? diapers? he would hate it so much though he hates having anything on him. we would have to pay someone to come take care of him. if he needs to go to the vet he 100% will poop in the car due to the anxiety? i guess of it all, or the exertion of trying to stay upright in a car.

he spends the majority of most days sleeping, but he is still so happy to eat. he runs to his food bowl in the morning, sometimes wiping out on the wood because he's so fast. he begs for scraps from my lunch, he loves treats. every night he gets excited for his nightly 'treat puzzles.' he doesn't cry or whine. if he sees a cat or dog while we're out he will get a burst of energy to chase after it. he enjoys pets. he is on a monthly shot for arthritis and a pain pill twice a day. other than arthritis and incontinence nothing else is wrong.

but due to, everything listed above, we can't really leave the house for more than 2 hours without worrying what we'll come home to. sometimes he is just sleeping exactly where we left him...sometimes he is in intense distress. so far we have turned down 2 trips and didn't visit my extended family over christmas because of the stress of leaving him for 2 days. the answer would be to board him at the vet but he has crazy anxiety when he's not in his house and would just hate it. and i keep googling things like "put dog down too early" and all i really get are people like "well my dog had kidney failure..." or something else, and anyone with just arthritis is met with "well have you tried acupuncture, or water therapy, or just get him diapers." etc it's hard and i just feel really bad all the time. i feel trapped in the house. i hate the "you'll know when it's time" saying as well because i don't. it's selfish but i wish he just wouldn't be able to get up at all anymore, it would make it easier on me. every other animal i've ever had in my life had a pretty sudden death, i really wasn't expecting this with my own dog.

we are supposed to go to japan for 2 weeks in june and my husband wants to put him down on his 15th birthday in april. i flip back and forth constantly, thinking it's better to put him down while he's still happy and somewhat normal, to feeling really guilty. maybe he could live to 16, or 17, with me constantly taking care of him and never going on another vacation. anyway. i barely know what's going on the world because my brain is just fogged up a lot of the time.

#cw pet loss #very long ramble

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muzaktomyears · 2 years ago

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Bruno treated us to what for him was a smile. “You boys will make the Indra into another Kaiserkeller,” he said. “No one comes to this place,” he admitted, stating the obvious. “But you’ll make it go when you make show.”

‘Make show’… that was the phrase we were going to have to learn to live with for a long time. Bruno, in his halting English, pronounced it ‘mack show’, which didn’t strike us as being all that amusing as we stood there like sacks of potatoes with our suitcases in hand.

“Where are we staying?” someone asked, trying to change the subject. By this time, we were all anxious to seek some escape in a comfortable night’s sleep in a cosy hotel bed. Misconception number two. Bruno led the way farther along to the wrong end of the street – to a dismal cinema called the Bambi Kino which showed third-rate Westerns and the occasional sex movie. We followed him round a corner to the rear of this drab flea-pit where he opened a door which gave on to nothing but pitch darkness. We trooped through and peering through the blackness made out a light some yards along what turned out to be a gloomy corridor. It came from a solitary light which attracted us towards it like moths; we began to run, leaving Bruno behind.

The light was coming from a room. Lennon got there first, heading the stampede, closely followed by Stu Sutcliffe, who was always somehow near John. George was just behind them and Paul and I were the last in the queue. It wasn’t a pretty sight that greeted us; a scruffy, barren room containing two single beds and an ancient couch.

“What the fucking hell?” Lennon exploded.

“Fuck me!” the rest of us said, almost in unison.

John and Stu commandeered a bed each. George staked his claim on the couch. It was the old story of first come, first served. Paul and I looked at each other, wondering what the floor felt like.

Bruno had caught up with us and tried to charm us with his smile. “But there are two more bedrooms,” he boasted; Paul and I immediately thought that possibly we were the lucky ones after all at the back of the line. A room each, we thought.

We saw them in the flickering glow of matches because these two rooms couldn’t muster a solitary bulb between them. They were two dungeons, which is how we referred to them from that moment. They measured about 5ft by 6ft and most of that was taken up by a single bed on which we dumped our cases.

“You could just about swing a cat in here,” Paul observed drily – “providing it’s got no tail!” We mouthed enough obscenities to paper a wall, but Bruno either didn’t understand or pretended not to. “Only temporary,” he kept saying, “only temporary.”

Paul sat down on his bed in the darkness and I heard the well-worn springs groan pitifully. I knew how they felt. So to bed on our first night in Hamburg, filled with disgust. The big stars from Liverpool… The Beatles!

Even in the daytime, we found, there was no light. Our billet was an extension built onto the rear of the cinema – right next to the toilets! We had to wash and shave in cold water in the cinema urinals – where sometimes the patrons of the Bambi Kino would surprise us and stand and stare at the haggard, black and white apparitions. Lennon, George and Stu were living in comparative luxury in their drab three-bed room some 25 yards along a corridor. Bruno’s ‘only temporary’ promise never did come true. We were doomed to the dungeons, which became home, stacked with guitar and drum cases and a collection of old laundry.

Paul and I never knew if it was night or day. We wrote letters home sitting on our beds with pocket torches strapped around our heads like miners’ lamps. Day after day we all complained to Bruno about the dingy squalor in which we were living. We pointed out that we were, after all, lads from decent middle-class backgrounds whose parents had scrimped and worked to try to give us a good education. What had we done to end up in Germany being treated like a bunch of dossers or winos ready to kip down anywhere for a night? Daily we were given the same smarmy smile and promises, promises. Bruno had once been a clown, we were told, but he certainly didn’t make us laugh.

Beatle! The Pete Best Story, Pete Best and Patrick Doncaster (1985)

#writing letters home with torches strapped to their heads😭#pete best #the beatles #hamburg

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joelscruff · 1 year ago

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hi! your writing is incredible and i have noticed you have also written a couple of darker fics. are there some tropes/types of characters you would not feel comfortable writing?

sorry for the late response on this non! i wasn't sure how to answer it just because i never want people to feel bad for the things they enjoy. this has always been a safe space without kinkshaming so i don't want anyone to think that just because i don't like certain things in fic that i'm condemning them or something, cause that's certainly not the case. so i'm just gonna put the answer under a readmore 💖

for me personally, the main things i don't tend to read/write are noncon & pregnancy. for noncon, there are some specific scenarios where i can suspend my discomfort (for example, my fics to freeze or to thaw & truth or dare have noncon-ish elements, but i've adjusted things to suit my particular tastes) but usually if i'm reading a fic where the reader consistently feels unsafe/afraid it's just not an enjoyable experience for me. as for pregnancy, i'm okay with it in small-ish doses, but i'm not really interested in reading fics where it's a main plot point. again, personal taste!

as for little kinks here and there, i usually avoid things having to do with feet (i hate feet, sorry to my feet loving friends 😔), as well as things involving bodily fluids like blood/spit/urine. and i know you're probably thinking... "cat, didn't you literally write a fic with piss kink?" ... yes i did. but AGAIN, it was such a specific scenario lmao. i don't seek it out and probably wouldn't read it unless it was kind of just a little tease of it like the one i wrote. also tbh my tastes are always evolving. for example i used to not read any fics that involved choking but i've found that it can be enjoyable for me when it's written a certain way, same with degradation.

such a long answer, sorry lmao. but i realized i should probably put this out there because i tend to get requests/asks sent to me sometimes that really don't fit my tastes and it's my own fault for not being clear about it. but i just wanna reiterate yet again that everyone has the right to write whatever they want! we all choose which content we consume ❤️

#cat's asks

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callsigndreadfrost · 1 year ago

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Still got Loke on the brain so here's a random list of faqs of my good boy. Oracle version.

He's left-handed.

Jelani was the first one to call him Lo and Loki. It was when he was first starting to talk and Loke was a bit difficult to pronounce. At first it was kind of a "low-ee" sound that progressed to Loki and then to Loke but the nicknames stuck ever since.

He's genderqueer and uses he/him and they/them. Either is fine with him.

He's queer. He used to use gay but felt it a bit restrictive and not right for him plus his mom uses queer so he went with queer. Men and male presenting are what he's attracted to.

The woman that birthed him tried to drown him when he was a week old. She took him to a river near the village and submerged him but luckily someone had stopped her. She ran away as they desperately tried to get him to start breathing again. He was fine.

Speaking of that woman, as of 2023 she is still alive and has on numerous occasions tried to approach him. She spoke to Sanaa once and asked if she could talk to him but Sanaa said that was Loke's decision. He wants absolutely NOTHING to do with her. Unfortunately he was told she tried to drown him and that caused a ton of drama and a bit of a trauma.

He bled to death once. He was run through with a bastard sword (I'd explain more but it's spoiler for something I'm currently writing).

His favorite animals are birds, foxes, and dogs.

He's afraid of cats. When he was little he used to feed some birds that hung around the village and one day he saw a cat kill and eat one of the birds.

He had a fiancé when he was 39 years old. He was killed during a raid. What no one except for Sanaa knew was that the fiancé was pregnant (trans) when he died. Obviously it was Loke's. That's a secret his mom's gonna take to her grave.

He has hemophilia, asthma, is far sighted, has seasonal allergies and is V E R Y allergic to tree nuts. Like one bite will either land him in the ER or the morgue.

Because of said hemophilia he will get random bruises anywhere in the body, his mouth will sometimes bleed, may cough blood, might bleed into his joints (apparently that's super painful), and yes, has had blood in his urine. All of these are really rare though.

Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaates using glasses so mostly sticks to using contacts.

I associate him with foxes (sable) and shiba inus.

The element I associate him with is lightning/thunder.

He's a Nordic berserker.

Speaking of, normally berserkers cannot use magic especially while in berserker mode. The only exception to that rule are the Nyota berserkers which are called arcanist berserkers. Sanaa is one of those specific berserkers. Ever since he was like 5 he wanted to learn to use magic like Sanaa does because he wanted to be just like his mom. Sanaa wasn't sure he would be able to learn what she was trying to teach him but she indulged him nonetheless.

It took years but Loke actually managed to learn how to pull off one of the Nyota's signature moves. Enchanting an arrow and firing it directly into the sky and exploding into hundreds or thousands of shards falling into the battlefield. He was also taught how to summon an element which in his case was lightning. He can have lightning wrapped around himself or a weapon. So far he's the only non-arcanist berserker to ever achieve this.

The man is stubborn as fuck all.

His chosen weapons as a berserker are a two headed axe and a bow and arrows (he chose a bow because his mom uses a bow).

During the early 2000s he and his mom enrolled in the same university to study medicine. They both graduated top of their class and did their residency at the same hospital. However, Sanaa got her license and is currently a doctor back home in Norway. Loke finished everything but went back to Oracle. He has that to fall back on whenever he chooses to retire from Oracle. He puts his medical knowledge to good use in the area of operations (the ao) and out of it tho.

Has adult separation anxiety. Technically speaking so does Jelani (only Angelus knows this but the rest suspect Jelani has it too). Neither can be separated for long periods of time. They start panicking when separated from each other for long periods of time.

His body count (like actual body count, not how many men he's had sex with) is disturbingly high. Disturbingly. High. He's very overprotective of the people he loves and will not hesitate to put two bullets into someone's skull and keep going as if nothing happened.

His favorite fruit is the mango. He really loves mangoes.

Favorite food is pizza.

Knows 13 languages: old Norse, Kiswahili, Xhosa, English, Lule Sámi, Norwegian, German, Icelandic, Faroese, Spanish, Setswana, Somali and Manyika. Basically the same languages Jelani knows.

Has a nicotine addiction and smokes. Not as much as he used to but he does.

Normally when berserkers are in berserker mode their irises tend to have a glow. However, Loke's sclera and irises turn red and no, it ain't normal. [No explanation due to spoilers].

He can sing and I do mean sing really good. He and Abigail often sing together by themselves. Abby loves to sing in front of others but Loke's shy about it. Everyone tells him he has a lovely voice though and he shouldn't feel shy about it.

If you wanna get technical about it Sanaa is his stepmother and Jelani is his half brother but he only ever refers to Sanaa as his mom and Jelani as his brother. He leaves out the step and the half. One of the worst ways you could possibly insult him is by calling Sanaa his stepmom and Jelani his half brother. Do that and you're instantly on his shit list forever, unless it wasn't intentional, just make sure you never do it again. Do it again and the ass kicking that follows will make your ancestors bleed.

He's a highly trained counter-sniper. He's also pretty good with a sniper. Trevor trained him. As it stands he's the second best sniper in all of Oracle.

He's extremely effective with any weapon he gets his hands on, he's also very accurate. If he missed it's because he wanted to.

He's ridiculously fast at drawing and firing weapons.

He's basically a human (no, he's not human, you know what I mean) lie detector. He can accurately tell when someone is lying.

He also makes an excellent double agent.

He's the only one who can tell when Jelani is lying.

According to tradition he was the next in line to be jarl. The position usually falls on the oldest child of the jarl's. However, he isn't one for such matters so he gave his position to Jelani who was, in his honest opinion, better suited for the role as he's proven to be a natural leader.

He is a very, very, very heavy sleeper. You literally have to shake him awake. Also it takes him like mere seconds to fall asleep.

He has 10 alarms on his phone cuz he sure as fuck ain't gonna hear the first 5.

He's super lazy.

He is the first and only non-Nyota to be a Warden.

He's 22 years older than Jelani.

He's the same age as his aunt Fae (Sanaa's sister).

When Jelani was born Loke basically turned into a third parent. It wasn't forced, he loved taking care of and looking after his baby brother. It was practically love at first sight.

He loves both of his parents but he's very attached to his mom.

Has three false right bottom molars. Hammer to the face.

Has two pet pigeons (Anga & Mvua) and a German Shepherd (Lyn).

Hates reading. Please don't make him read, it makes his brain cry.

Hates exercising. Has to be dragged to do it.

His ID number is 00-2144.

His favorite season is fall.

Likes the beach but the beach does not like him. He doesn't tan, he burns.

He kinda stopped physically aging. Sanaa noticed this long ago but isn't sure of what's going on so she's kept it to herself just in case.

After a certain event [can't say due to spoilers] Loke can't actually really die. He might die for a few minutes to an hour depending on the severity of the injury but he'll always come back. The only way he'll permanently die is if Jelani dies. [Again, not explaining bc of spoilers]. He'll scar like normal berserkers do though or lose limbs if not careful. No one is aware of this, not even him or Jelani.

During the "God Virus" story when Jelani loses total control because of the virus Loke sort of lost control. Sort of. [Spoilers. Can't explain yet]

He belongs to Uthorim.

Wants to have kids someday.

Is a hugger. He loves to hug. Unless the person isn't comfortable with it. Is also a cuddler when sleeping.

As a sort of "easter egg" all of Loke's au versions have all au versions of Iain try to kill him or manage to injure him in some way.

Is actually really good with kids. He often babysits for others as well as driving down to New York to babysit for his aunt Fae. Yes, it's a 10 hour drive. No, he doesn't give a fuck.

Sleeps with a shirt on. Just a shirt.

Like his brother he's into metal.

#if i think of any more i'll rb it #Loke tag #oc things

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1solone · 2 years ago

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😯🤔😎

DID YOU KNOW ! ! !

They used to use urine to tan animal skins, so families used to all pee in a pot & then once a day it was taken & Sold to the tannery.......if you had to do this to survive you were "Piss Poor"

But worse than that were the really poor folk who couldn't even afford to buy a pot......they "didn't have a pot to piss in" & were the lowest of the low

The next time you are washing your hands and complain because the water temperature isn't just how you like it, think about how things used to be. Here are some facts about the 1500s:

Most people got married in June because they took their yearly bath in May, and they still smelled pretty good by June.. However, since they were starting to smell . ...... . Brides carried a bouquet of flowers to hide the body odor. Hence the custom today of carrying a bouquet when getting Married.

Baths consisted of a big tub filled with hot water. The man of the house had the privilege of the nice clean water, then all the other sons and men, then the women and finally the children. Last of all the babies. By then the water was so dirty you could actually lose someone in it.. Hence the saying, "Don't throw the baby out with the Bath water!"

There was nothing to stop things from falling into the house. This posed a real problem in the bedroom where bugs and other droppings could mess up your nice clean bed. Hence, a bed with big posts and a sheet hung over the top afforded some protection. That's how canopy beds came into existence.

In those old days, they cooked in the kitchen with a big kettle that always hung over the fire.. Every day they lit the fire and added things to the pot. They ate mostly vegetables and did not get much meat. They would eat the stew for dinner, leaving leftovers in the pot to get cold overnight and then start over the next day. Sometimes stew had food in it that had been there for quite a while. Hence the rhyme: Peas porridge hot, peas porridge cold, peas porridge in the pot nine days old. Sometimes they could obtain pork, which made them feel quite special. When visitors came over, they would hang up their bacon to show off. It was a sign of wealth that a man could, "bring home the bacon." They would cut off a little to share with guests and would all sit around and chew the fat.

Bread was divided according to status. Workers got the burnt bottom of the loaf, the family got the middle, and guests got the top, or the upper crust.

Lead cups were used to drink ale or whisky. The combination would Sometimes knock the imbibers out for a couple of days. Someone walking along the road would take them for dead and prepare them for burial.. They were laid out on the kitchen table for a couple of days and the family would gather around and eat and drink and wait and see if they would wake up. Hence the custom of holding a wake.

The country is old and small and the local folks started running out of places to bury people. So they would dig up coffins and would take the bones to a bone-house, and reuse the grave. When reopening these coffins, 1 out of 25 coffins were found to have scratch marks on the inside and they realized they had been burying people alive... So they would tie a string on the wrist of the corpse, lead it through the coffin and up through the ground and tie it to a bell. Someone would have to sit out in the graveyard all night (the graveyard shift.) to listen for the bell; thus, someone could be, saved by the bell or was considered a dead ringer.

And that's the truth....Now, whoever said History was boring?

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nik-the-bik · 2 years ago

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Hello! I hate to be that guy, but I **Work in Property Management**

(to clarify, I am not your landlord. Your landlord signs my paycheck to do the shit they don't want to deal with. I too am exploited for my labor but have to earn money somehow).

And the above poster??? A little alarmist.

Let me tell you about the importance of Pet Pictures in Shared Living!

Yes, there may absolutely be slumlords out there who look for any excuse to kick a person out (but like...why not just let them live there if they're still a good tenant? Usually the only excuse is bigotry or greed). There are definitely also slumlords who will happily deny someone who needs the service animal ((WHICH IS MOST ALWAYS A VIOLATION OF FAIR HOUSING AND YOU SHOULD LOOK UP YOUR RIGHTS!)).

But from MY experience, we ask for pet pictures for the following reasons:

Identifying the animal and it's owner in the event the animal gets out. Within my first month on the job we had a cat freaking out in the hallway and no idea who it belonged to because it wasn't registered and we had no photos. Do you want your kitty to be scared for hours or do you want us to be able to contact you immediately and make sure it's safely brought home? (if you were nervous, the kitty was fine!)

Identifying the animal/it's owner if there is a report from another resident. Sometimes this is a dog peeing on carpet and the dog's owner doesn't make the effort to clean it up. Say what you will about tattling, but that's a public health issue and try as we might, that carpet might hold onto that scent forever if other dogs catch a whiff. Do you want to live surrounded by urine smells?

Identifying the animal/it's owner if there is an altercation with another resident/animal. The reality is that some dogs do not do well with other dogs, and if there is a shared dog area, you sometimes have very unfortunate circumstances where one dog becomes an aggressor. Knowing who it belongs to allows us to have a discussion with that dog owner about how to either better manage their dog around other dogs, possibly restrict access to the shared pet areas, and only in the absolute worst case scenarios that I've heard of where someone's pet was rushed into emergency surgery, asked to have the aggressive animal leave the premises. (also in this instance that I'm familiar with, the hurt dog made a full recovery!)

If someone's dog looks like a mixed breed of one of the ones we restrict (which is its own stupid rule but I have no power over it), I just. Look away. Not my business. Most of my colleagues are generally of the same mind. Whose to say what breed it is without a blood test? I'm not gonna test that dog's blood.

All in all, if you're skeptical about sending pet pics, use your best judgement based on the type of property you're renting and who owns it! Always look up your landlord if you can!

Also yes, I do enjoy looking at your pet photos. Someone once sent us a picture of their cat named Thumbs and I was obsessed for days.

i feel like i’m going insane. what fucking alternate dimension are these people living in. who thinks this way about landlords

#i was gonna just rant in the tags but i realized fuck it no this was worth saying

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empidonax · 14 days ago

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long rambly cat vent below

my cat has never been consistent about using a litter box (she's 16 my family has had her since she was ~3 months old) but the past couple weeks have been really bad; accidents every time we leave the house and sometimes overnight.

it's overwhelming me and driving me insane because it feels like nothing I can do will stop it. I can't be home 24/7 monitoring her. we don't have the room to start putting her in a crate when we leave. we don't have the room for more litterboxes.

she went to the vet around 2 months ago and got blood/urine samples which were all normal. I suppose she could have developed a UTI since then, but since she only has accidents when we're not in the room (or asleep) it really seems like more of a behavioral thing.

made the mistake of switching her litter yesterday and she hasn't used the box since. I broke down today and I'm still feeling awful. I love this cat, she's been with me for the majority of my life, she's the sweetest cat and loves people and sleeping on us and begging for attention. I love this cat but today every time she mrrps at me I just want to cry. one of my housemates lost their childhood cat last weekend and I feel so fucking ungrateful because their baby died and I still have mine but right now I can't even interact with her and I just.

I am so sick of dealing with cat piss and smelling it everywhere and her ruining things that I care about and things that don't belong to me and having to completely alter the space that I live in to adjust to her.

I live with my partner and we had to cover all of the carpet in her room with plastic matting to protect it except my cat still pees on it and it gets through the gaps and the carpet being squashed down for two years has probably ruined it anyways. we're sleeping with a tablecloth over the bed tonight (and put it on the bed every time we leave the room) because otherwise she'll pee on us in the middle of the night.

she is driving me insane and I genuinely don't know what to do or how to handle this

#kes talks

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gyaep · 23 days ago

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tried LUSH list

(will update from time to time)

Probably LUSH is my first fragrance brand I've ever tried. This was due to their "affordable" prices compared to other brands at least in the place where I lived. I used to be obsessed with their products other than perfumes or body sprays but somehow not anymore lol. It seems like my skins are fine even with cheaper skin care products.

Rose Jam

This was the first body spray I bought in around 2019ish? I loved it because this full of rose scents gave some cozy vibes and had images of rose flavored mousse desserts. However, I was almost suffocated when I sprayed more than twice one time at a car and now this scent just gives me a headache.

2. Twilight (aka. Sleepy)

I bought this when it was named as Twilight. I had no idea it had changed to Sleepy. I used to like this smell too because this was less feminine compared to Rose Jam, and it did not give suffocating headaches, so I like the fact that I could spray this multiple times (also it means the smell does not last long). I prefer the initial scent of more vegetal or greenery smell, something like the strong, bitter scent you could smell when you break a tree branch or plants, but it seems like the sweet vanilla or tonka beans last longer which sometimes give greasy characteristics.

3. Avocado co-wash

I dont really understand why I bought this lol. Some may could have realized that I am not a fan of sweet or overly sweet scents, but I bought this nevertheless. This smells like as if skittles were melted into liquid and sprayed all over me. This means this scent can lure ants or pesticides. Not sure when the ants invaded my house was due to this spray, but this was too sweet for me.

4. Big

This is the spray I love and I recently bought another one. Very fresh and citrusy which does not remind me of cleaning products' citrusy. The only negative thing about this is that it does not last long. I also use Big Shampoo, and I prefer the shampoo scents due to salts which derives more beachy vibes. I love summer and beach, but most of the fragrances that are promoted with those imageries of summer often smell like aftershave or barber shop-like masculine scents, which I hate. I like Big because it doesn't give that kind of vibes.

5. Salty

Heard it from somewhere that Big would smell like daytime beach while Salty would smell like nighttime beach, so I decided to purchase this and requested a refund on the next day it was delivered. This... was just an aftershave smell which how I described previously and it was so strong that I could smell it for like three days.

6. Sex Bomb

I... can't smell a thing.. lol... I didn't buy this. I always try to smell this one first whenever I visit the shop, but I never could smell this at all.

7. Guardian of the forest

Very green. But the smell is the same from the beginning to the end.

8. Once Upon a Time

Images of very sour green apples. Kind of gave me Avocado Co-wash vibes so didn't buy it.

Dirty

I don't like it but I bought it lol... because someone told me its base note is soooo goood. but this was just another Salty for me. Salty but minty. I use it to cover up the cat urine smells when my cat does not properly cover his piss.

2. Junk

I thought I liked this but now it smells like when Dirty meets blackcurrants. I would only use it in the cold winter but not in the summer due its sweetness.

3. Turmeric Latte

Wow this does not smell like coffee or latte at all. This smells like burnt sugar or dalgona from squid game.

4. Cardamom Coffee

Wow this does not smell like coffee or latte at all. This smells like chai tea. Not sure I would want to smell like chai tea.

5. Pansy

I really like the floral in the beginning, but the base notes are overly sweet for me. Would purchase it if it was only floral.

6. Fresh As

This always smells different whenever I try it out. Sometimes fresh like Big, but sometimes too green like the Guardian of the forest. So can't really decide whether should I get it or not.

#perfume #fragrance #LUSH #review

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animalhospitalga2-blog · 3 months ago

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Cat Wellness Check from Veterinarian

A regular cat wellness check with a veterinarian is essential for keeping your feline friend in the best possible health. During these check-ups, your vet can spot potential issues early, ensuring your cat stays happy and comfortable for years to come. From checking their weight and coat condition to assessing dental health and overall behavior, a thorough wellness check covers all the important aspects of your cat’s well-being. These visits also allow your vet to provide guidance on proper diet, exercise, and preventive care tailored to your cat’s age, breed, and lifestyle. Prioritizing these check-ups not only improves your cat’s quality of life but also gives you peace of mind, knowing that they are well taken care of.

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catsanddishes · 7 months ago

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About two months ago I posted about Emily's health - we'd been to the vet for urinary issues twice in as many weeks at that point, and we didn't have a definitive answer yet. I want to write up the narrative of what's been happening just to get it down mostly for myself, so this will be a long post about medical stuff, please read with care if you read at all. Or, please enjoy these photos of Emily napping on my tummy in bed and skip the novel if you like. I'll put a tl;dr at the bottom.

BACKSTORY

At the time of the last post (Aug. 15) we were assuming some kind of kidney or bladder stone - her bloodwork was fine, and two cultures for UTI came back negative. Stones are hard to diagnose and can be really small and there were some crystals in her urine so it seemed likely. She also had extremely diluted urine, which was strange since the bloodwork showed normal kidney function (cats often suffer kidney problems in old age - Em is 12). But she does love her water fountain so maybe she was just over-hydrating in her desire to feel better.

Her primary symptom was that she would suddenly freeze and pee in the middle of whatever she was doing - napping, often. She'd stand up, pee, and then stare around confusedly and yowl over it. And I mean, like, yowl. The first time it happened, I realized my spouse had left the litter boxes stacked after cleaning up in the cat closet (this actually took me a bit to figure out because I wasn't totally sure if she'd just spit up water or peed, that's how diluted her urine was). So maybe she'd gone 24 hours without peeing since the box wasn't super accessible. But it happened twice again the next day, and we thought maybe she gave herself a UTI from holding it in or something?? We took her in to the emergency vet since it was a weekend, saying she's peeing outside the litter box. The doctors asked, is she straining to urinate? To which I had to say, well, I don't know? I've not caught her in the littler box trying and failing, I only know that she's suddenly peeing and seeming very startled by it. There's no posturing or effort as far I can tell, but what do I know, I'm not a doctor? She seemed uncomfortable, but more because it took her by surprise and sometimes ended up with wet legs from her own pee.

Both the emergency vet and regular vet follow-up eliminated UTI and confirmed "perfect" bloodwork. So the litter box stacking was maybe a red herring or made a stone get worse? We got her on a urinary care prescription food that's also supposed to be good for "stress" (tbh, Emily has always been an anxious cat - she overgrooms, and has a belly empty of fur because of it). The food would help break up stones, and she was on a painkiller to help with any pain that urinating might be causing.

AFTER THE AUGUST 15TH POST

When we ran out of one form of the painkiller a little less than a week after her visit with the regular vet, she made it maybe 24 hours before she had another peeing episode. She'd been okay for a few days at that point. I had been reluctant to keep her on painkillers as a permanent thing, but we got more since it was the one thing that seemed to be reliably helping. And we could get it in a capsule format which we could pop open and mix the powder into her new wet food for easy intake. At least her pee was more normal colored (and unfortunately smelling), so the urinary care food was obviously doing some good.

But she was still having episodes after a few more days and they seemed to happen when the painkiller would be wearing off. The episodes were also getting worse over the course of the month throughout this whole thing. She started huffing and drooling a bit when they happened. She stopped yowling about it, though. We thought we would just have to wait it out til the food improved her insides. But the episodes kept happening and she was freezing up for longer each time and drooling more. Her tail would puff out. We thought, could she possibly be having seizures?? But none of these incidents lasted more than maybe 20-30 seconds, and again, we're not doctors, what do we know... We thought we just have to be patient, pick up the new painkiller script, she'll get better. Maybe these are panic attacks she's having since the peeing is upsetting and it'll get better when her GI tract is settled.

THE SCARY PART

On August 26th, I had given Em her morning food with painkiller and was getting read to go to work. My spouse had already left. Emily, sitting near her food dish, suddenly froze up and peed and I was exasperated, but this time instead of drooling a bit and shaking it off, she panted like she couldn't breath, drooled like a fountain and it didn't stop. I tried to touch her to pet her and calm her down. She flailed. She tried to scramble away, but her legs didn't seem to want to work. She crashed into a nearby box and fell over. She lay on her side twitching and huffing and drooling and I knew it was a seizure and I thought I was watching my baby die. I was afraid to touch her so I sat on the floor crying over my cat for maybe 45 seconds, maybe a minute, while our other cat sat nearby looking confused, and then she rolled over onto her belly and breathed normally. She was dazed for another minute, but then was up and demanding to be fed. Every episode would always be followed by demands for snacks, so at least it was easy to get her to eat the new food. Still crying, I fed her and called my spouse to get off at the next train stop and come home, we had to take her back in.

Emily hates the carrier and she hates the car. The emergency vet we trust is right near my work, but it's a half an hour by car and often 45 minutes to an hour in morning traffic. She cries almost the whole time every time, no matter how often we go. Though once at a vet, she's always very good and doesn't fight the techs and doctors at all. She's a very good girl minus the crying, and everyone loves her.

It was a long day at the hospital. I went into work for a few hours because it was a Monday, and that's the day that I have to order all the supplies for the shop for the week. It's difficult to pass off on someone else on short notice. I told the hospital staff I was bringing her in for what sure fucking looked like a seizure an hour ago, and now I was re-evaluating all her other episodes in this light. I only had video of the tail end of a much earlier incident, it was in poor light and just showed her looking puffy and drooling a bit. I hadn't videoed that morning because my phone wasn't in my hand and I was afraid to leaver her side. The doctors were baffled, and still were describing her episodes as "straining to urinate". But they prepared a list of tests and boxes to tick to figure things out. Hoping to actually find the stones they assumed were in there, they suggested an ultrasound. I thought, I'm pretty sure that's not it at this point, but it's probably best to truly eliminate all the possibilities before we go on to MRIs or whatever else was on their barrage. I don't even remember anymore. There were a lot of technical words thrown at us.

THE DIAGNOSIS

The ultrasound came back with this: there's a mass in her intestine. It's probably cancer. A biopsy confirmed: gastrointestinal lymphoma. The emergency doctor wasn't sure exactly how this was causing the peeing problems, since it's not affecting the kidney or the urinary tract directly, but maybe something was putting pressure on something else. She thought we'd caught it early, but it was possible it was elsewhere and just not showing up as a mass elsewhere yet.

We made an appointment with the oncology department for Wednesday morning. We thought, even if the doctors aren't convinced yet, we are. Its seizures and this cancer is in her brain. But we'll go to the specialist and see what they say. I took video of her next episode, though the seizures she had in the day between the visits were much more mild and shorter and she didn't fall over, though she wobbled. The oncologist didn't feel comfortable saying for sure it was seizures from the video, but while she was in on Wednesday, she had one, and the oncologist got the neurologist to come look at her while it was happening. They confirmed yep, seizure, and she can't see (or hear, likely, though how would you test that) while it's happening. That's why she freaked when I touched her on Monday because she didn't know what was touching her. I probably made that one worse.

The prognosis was - without treatment (or rather, just drugs to make her feel better, but not do anything about the cancer) she'd have maybe a couple weeks, maybe a month. With chemo, she could have 4 to 6 months, maybe a year if she's in the 5% who respond really well. There's also 5% whose cancer won't respond at all. Chemo for cats isn't like human chemo. You can't get so aggressive that you actually eliminate all the cancer. You can't explain to a cat what's happening, and chemo makes you feel sick. Like you're dying if you're a human. If a cat thinks they're dying for an extended period of time, they will probably die. They'll just shut themselves down, they don't know it's temporary, they can't understand your reassurances. So the chemo is just enough to reduce the cancer without making them feel too sick. You can't give them enough to totally eliminate it, unfortunately, just buy time.

The course of chemo we chose is one pill every three weeks for six doses. This option was the only one that was a form of chemo medication that can cross the blood-brain barrier and get at the cancer that's somewhere in there giving her seizures. Each dose is a hospital visit so they can check her bloodwork to make sure she's well enough to handle the chemo. At home, she has to take a steroid once a day to combat the chemo depressing her appetite and to make her feel better overall. She also will have to take anti-seizure medication for the rest of her life (assuming her life extends beyond the course of the chemo treatment).

All of this will cost us somewhere in the range of $7k over the course of treatment. On top of the costs we'd already paid: two emergency hospital visits, one regular vet visit, prescription food, and other medications. Emily is going to cost us as much as the HVAC unit we had to replace earlier this year. Between these two things, we're wiping out a huge chunk of savings. We're lucky my spouse has a decently well-paying job with regular raises. We're lucky I took on a second job for a while and got a raise at my full time. We're lucky I'm done with student loans and his got suspended during some of the pandemic and next year he'll be able to get the rest forgiven. We have the money to do this and I'm so grateful we can afford it.

THE NEXT SIX WEEKS / TREATMENT

So we go home with one radioactive cat (litter box must be cleaned promptly when she goes and with gloves for a couple days after each dose), and two new medications. We wean her off the painkiller pretty much after the first day or two because, while it may have been helping her be a little more chill, it's clearly not the most effective drug of our little pharmacy. The anti-seizure medication must be given 3x day, every 8 hours. The steroid is once a day. We started off with liquid versions of the two new meds, and the anti-seizure one she ate no problem mixed into her (expensive, probably not necessary but we bought two cases of it) wet food. The steroid smelled terrible, even to me. Like fake oranges or strawberries? She absolutely refused it, even with tuna, so I was forced to try to shove a syringe full down her throat and hope some of it made it down. After two attempts at that, we emailed the hospital so I could pick up a pill version and we got some pill pocket treats. That worked much better.

The first 24 hours, she still had three seizures. Even though the meds should have started working within hours. The hospital team said the dose range could go up to .5ml more than what was listed on the bottle, so we upped her to the max and the seizures stopped. This medication also has side effects of tiredness and potentially lessened appetite. But she bounced back within couple days and was eating normally and seemed to be in good spirits. We also got a pill version of this one since she seemed to like the pill pockets, and that way we could just give her the little bit of extra dosage in the wet food and not be trying to make her eat it all in her food.

The first three weeks went well. She got to her second chemo dose with flying colors. It was such a relief to not be cleaning cat pee out of the carpet or scrubbing tile or running blankets through the wash several times a day, and worrying about her next episode constantly. The hardest part was days when my spouse had to be in the office rather than work from home (my work is retail, no way to do that from home..), so the timing of her 3x a day was messed up. It's really only once a week since I have one weekday off that overlaps with one of his in-office day, and the other day he's in, I get off an hour earlier (which is still not exactly on time for her afternoon dose, but close enough). But she didn't have problems after that initial adjustment period.

She got a second dose of chemo. Her appetite started to wane, and a few days after I'd told the doctor how great she was at eating pill pockets, she bit one in half by accident, got the taste of the pill in her mouth, and was put off the treats. We had bought several bags, of course. We got a different flavor and thought, we'll come back to this first one. Nope, she wasn't having it. Flat out refused to even lick a pill pocket treat. So we switched back to putting the full dose of anti-seizure in her food and topping it with tuna to get her to eat it. Three times day we had to sit with her and coach her through a bowl, making sure she got at least 90% of it down, and making sure Isabel didn't eat any of it. If we put some fresh catnip leaves on it towards the end, that usually got her to finish it up. Thank goodness the catnip seeds sprouted and did well this year.

But the steroid we just had to give her the pill, since that didn't come in any other appetizing form. It's a very small pill, so I was mostly just holding her down and shoving it in her mouth. It's a good thing we've had 12 years of love and affection and she trusts me not to hurt her. She didn't like it, by any stretch, but it was going okay.

My spouse wasn't as good at it, though, and as we approached the midway point to the next chemo, she was seriously struggling to eat We had to start giving her the anti-seizure in pill form just to make sure she got it. That also means she was getting a smaller dose of it, since we weren't able to get her to eat a follow up little bit in wet food. The only thing she wanted to eat was treats.

So it's week three and we're having to give a cat 4 pills a day - 8:30am, 5:30pm, 8pm (steroid), 12:30am. She hates it, and increasingly fights us over it. We get a pill shooter that holds the pill so you don't have to put your fingers in an angry cat's mouth. It helps a bit, but sometimes it takes 4 tries before we can get it down her throat. She spits, she drools to try to keep it out of her. If you catch her sleepy, she fights less, but if she's not sleeping somewhere convenient, she'll know what you're up to when you pick her up. We try various other foods to make "pill pockets" out of, but none work more than once. It's a bad week and half leading up to the next chemo. We're exhausted, we're emotionally wrung out. We have scratches all over our hands. I've got a fingernail cracked with a bruise underneath where she bit down hard.

WHERE WE ARE NOW

At her third appointment, it's time for the midway tests to see how well the cancer is responding. The good news is that the mass in her intestine is noticeably reduced!

We also get the bad news that her bloodwork shows the kidney function is low. It's probably just an infection since her immune system is shot, but it means she can't have chemo today and she needs to take an antibiotic to treat it. They send us home with an ear cream to stimulate appetite and the antibiotic is once a day and supposedly a yummy chewable tablet. The ear cream is demon magic and we can give her the anti-seizure in food again. We keep her at the smaller dose size, though, since she still hasn't had any seizures, even with all the stress.

The bottle of antibiotics says "highly palatable" and "keep well sealed", as if it's so good cats are going to be clawing at the lid to get at it. WHAT A LIE. She doesn't eat it with her treats or the brand new bag of dry food (her favorite after treats). I chop it up and chop up treats to go with it. That works once. I chop it up and hide it in tuna. That sort of works, but she's clearly not thrilled about it, despite the magical hunger-inducing ear cream. And it puts her off the wet food again, though she's crazy for the fresh bag of dry food.

Somehow we make it through one more week, and though her kidneys aren't perfect, they are improved enough for chemo. That was this past Monday - Oct. 14th. They said we have to keep up the antibiotics for another week to make sure the infection is cleared out. I'm not sure how we'll trick her into several more days of it, but I've just done a new dose of ear cream since her appetite for dry food was waning again. She happily downed wet food with tuna sans meds today, so we'll try that again with her anti-seizure tonight.

The doctors also said we could try to bring her down to anti-seizure meds just twice a day since she's doing so well and hasn't had a breakthrough seizure on the smaller dose. So we're on day three of that and okay so far, no seizures. Twice a day actually will let us live our lives a little more easily. My spouse is out of the country next week, so if you've made it this far, pls send me good vibes while I do this on my own!

GOOD NEWS

The good new overall is that Emily has responded really well in an existential sense to all this. She had been hiding inside the couch, being very lethargic, etc. before we got the cancer diagnosis. She acted like a very ill cat for several weeks, seemingly out of the blue. Up til then, you wouldn't have even guessed that she was technically elderly. Now although she has good and bad days on energy, she's no longer hiding. At all. Not even to get away from being given meds. I think the only times she's gone inside the couch has been to hide from the vacuum cleaner. She sleeps with me every night. She comes to sit on a lap and purrs within 20 minutes of shoving pills in her. She clearly doesn't think she's sick, even if she does have lethargic days sometimes. I think she might on some level understand that we're trying to help her - or at least, we're not trying to hurt her - even though her body makes her fight us on pills and she can't help how she feels about food. She's such a good cat. I can't express how much I love her.

At the outset when we got the diagnosis, I thought, she'll make to Christmas probably... maybe... I couldn't see past the end of the year, honestly. I'm feeling a lot more optimistic that she could make the full six months, maybe longer now. I'm still not looking very far into the future, and mostly I'm just treasuring every peaceful moment I have with her. It's still a very day-by-day thing. I'm never sure how well she'll take her meds and that still gives me anxiety at every dose. But I'm going to be getting more sleep now that I don't have to do medication at midnight, so that helps with the mental/emotional stability. We're doing mostly okay now. I'm so glad all the drugs do their jobs and make her feel normal.

TL;DR

Emily appeared to be having urinary issues, but they were, in fact mini seizures that made her lose bladder control, caused by cancer (lymphoma). She's halfway through a course of chemo and seems to be responding well to it - it will buy her six months to a year at best. Giving cats medication is hard, and this whole thing has wrung us out, emotionally (and $$). But Em doesn't know she's sick anymore and she's as sweet as ever when you're not making her take pills!

#cats of tumblr

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