#which is cheap I know

[netherzon]

Timbits Disappearing Act

Whelp, recently I mentioned an old fanfiction I read awhile ago that had an idea I liked, but a plot that I didn’t really, so here’s my take on it I guess?

Inspired by this post, although it ended up more like Canada is still just invisible. Its in the tags on that post that I mentioned the other fic

Also sorry about the ending, I couldn’t think of anything more satisfying than whatever people imagine Alfred had to do to earn the timbit’s forgiveness.

Very few nations knew this about him, but Canada loved donuts. Almost as much as he loved maple syrup. If he had to choose, he’d probably rank donuts in third place. First place would be maple syrup, obviously. Second place would be maple donuts.

He never tried to hide this fact, but almost nobody knew because most of the nations couldn’t really see him. 

He had theorized before about why that is. He used to think maybe it was because he wasn’t likable enough, but he’s pretty much as likable as a nation can be, and nothing changed. Then he thought maybe he wasn’t exciting enough, but even inventing a sport where people tied knives to their feet and tackled each other on purpose hadn’t changed anything. That’s when he started thinking: maybe it wasn’t him exactly, maybe it was circumstance.

There were so many nations. Very few of them ever actually got to talk during a world meeting. Dialogue was not split evenly. It was a competitive environment, and while Canada wasn’t bothered by competition per se, having a say during the global meetings wasn’t usually something he was motivated to do.

He was cozy where he was. He used to be a bit resentful of his brother, how people just seemed to pay attention to him naturally. Alfred just always seemed to have the spotlight. Over time though...

“America!” 

he learned to appreciate the benefits of near invisibility.

Alfred’s attention moves back to the front of the room, where Austria had been giving his presentation. Matthew takes the opportunity to lean over and grab another timbit from the box his brother stole from him.

Austria was glaring up at Alfred from his spot by the podium, “How many times do we have to tell you not to bring food to meetings?”

“Well, it worked after four, but this is the nineteenth time your askin me that, so my bet is on a number higher than nineteen,” Alfred says with a winning smile. 

Multiple sighs and groans echoed around the room.

“Huh,” Matthew mutters around a mouthful of donut, “even Austria is getting on your ass about it now. You really should stop eating at meetings, Alfred.”

Alfred’s smile doesn’t slip an inch as he spins in his chair to flip Matthew the bird, and Matthew laughs in response.

Across the room, England frowned, “what kind of maths is that supposed to be? If it's the nineteenth time, then it didn’t work after the fourth.”

Alfred continues his chair spin till he’s gone 360 degrees around to point back at Arthur, “Yeah, except for it did! I haven’t brought any food to a meeting since the fourth time y’all told me not to!”

“America, you have two boxes of…,” Germany frowned, “What do you call those again?”

“Munchkins,” Alfred answers automatically, glancing innocently over at Matthew, “they’re from Dunkin.”

Matthew sucks in a breath and almost chokes. Alfred scoots over to pat him hard on the back, but keeps his eyes on Germany. Matthew tries to glare at his brother anyway. Hopefully he got his point across without words. If my windpipe wasn’t full of delicious TIMBITS right now, you’d be in so much pain. 

“Right,” Germany says, clearly confused to see Alfred waving his hand in the air strangely, “whatever they are, you have two boxes of them. Sitting right in front of you.”

“Yeah, but I didn’t bring those,” Alfred replies simply.

Matthew, recovered from what would have been one of his most embarrassing deaths yet (even if it was only Alfred who noticed), decides to enact his revenge. First though, he’ll grab another handful of timbits.

“Then who did?” Arthur asks.

Alfred points directly at Matthew, his finger almost poking his brother’s nose. His brother, who is frozen with one hand deep in the box of timbits, right in front of everyone at the meeting. 

“Canada,” Alfred says.

There was a moment of silence, and the whole room seemed to pause. Everyone was looking in Matthew’s direction. He could feel himself starting to blush with embarrassment. Alfred looks pleasantly surprised; he hadn’t been expecting that to work either, but it would be nice to not be the only one in trouble for once. Figures the first time Alfred rats me out suddenly everyone can see-

“Who?” he hears.

“Oh, you’ve gotta be kidding me!” Alfred cries, throwing up his hands.

Matthew releases a breath, half relief and half disappointment. He grabs both boxes of timbits and slides them back towards his seat.

“Canada!” Alfred says again, still pointing, “Right there! The nation of Canada? My brother?”

Everyone just looked confused. 

“The one covered in donut crumbs!” Alfred continues. This makes Matthew glance down at his suit. There were a couple pieces of glaze sticking to his tie, but it wasn’t that bad.

“He brings donuts to every meeting! Every time I get yelled at for having donuts, Canada is the one who brought them. He’s practically addicted!”

Austria is rubbing his temples, “None of this is even important,” he snaps, “I do not care where the doughnuts originally came from. The problem is I can’t even hear myself think over the sound of you chewing.”

Alfred sighs, exasperated, and reaches towards Matthew and the two boxes of timbits, “It's not my fault you have super hearing, Beethoven.” Matthew scoots away, clutching the boxes close to his chest.

Austria’s face flushes, “Beethoven was deaf,” he scoffs, “and German.”

Alfred is looking solely at Matthew though, “bro, you cannot be serious.”

Matthew shakes his head solemnly, “you disrespected my timbits, bro. Disrespect the timbits, and you lose timbits privileges.”

“Wha-, so you’re really not gonna share anymore?” Alfred asks, incredulously.

“You know why it has to be this way,” Matthew says in the most serious voice he has.

“Aw c’mon, Matt, they’re not that different.”

Matthew narrows his eyes with actual irritation. “Go on, dig the hole deeper, I’ll wait.”

Alfred does the smart thing and pauses to consider the options. Insist on being right (because he is) but also end up arguing with Matthew and no donuts, or talk him into sharing...

Alfred puts on what he calls his ‘straight-talkin face’. “Alright, what do ya want for ‘em?”

[junkworldusa]

i added this as a reblog but it should get its own post - this little zine is available on ko-fi as a free printable pdf! mini-zines are surprisingly addictive, once you start printing & folding your brain latches onto it & it's hard to stop. indescribable feeling of having something you drew in your hands & being able to flip through it and show other people.

[shalom-iamcominghome]

Yet another jewish privilege: Stores putting sales on holiday items because (apparently) management has no clue when "those people's" holidays are.

They put chanukah candles on sale for $0.71 a box the week before chanukah

[horsechestnut]

Anyway, if you're a fan of Bruce and Steph having a father/daughter relationship you should probably go read about Oliver and Mia.

[rawliverandcigarettes]

Thinking about Mass Effect, as you do, and how I'm kind of sad that the way it's been engraved in pop culture has more to do with the way internet reacted to it at the time than what the actual game is about. Yes sure, it's about romance (and not that much all things considered) and it's pulpy (but not solely because of hot lady aliens), but it's also intricate worldbuilding that touches on a lot of sharp ideas, and a complicated tug-of-war between a genuine and vulnerable belief in reconciliation and community VS post 9-11 US military propaganda and steadfast belief in heroic exceptionalism, and the melancholic yet energizing mood, and the daring narrative systems, and so so much more than the 'We'll Bang OKs" and the "There's No Shepard Without Vakarian" and the whole ME3 ending situation

It's all there, but I'm sad the impact of the series is often reduced to (what I think is) the least interesting parts of its sum

[skippingthroughfields]

one thing that's missing from these convos about amc not submitting assad zaman for a golden globes nom that makes it 10x more malicious on amc's part is that a nomination isn't just like oh... ~simple appreciation for an actor's performance. even if there's no win, it results in a profile boost for these actors & them being able to command a higher salary when it comes to future projects. it's something that gets notice on their CV. these studios and networks love being able to market their shit with things like "starring golden globe nominee john doe" or "emmy winner jane doe." the emmys are more prestigious than the golden globes which are more prestigious than the critics choice awards (the one they submitted him for with two other actors lol). actors get nominated and have the opportunity to get attention from social media posts, article mentions, attending the red carpet, having their name announced and a little clip of their acting shown. that's not nothing! attention from possible new fans, publications, execs, peers, producers, directors, fashion houses & other industries which could lead to $$$ and sponsorships. I won't make any presumptions about the cast's finances but I do know amc is probably not paying them their worth, least of all the bangladeshi muslim who barely had any major roles in tv/film prior to the show.

there are fees and costs associated with submitting for awards consideration and FYC ads. the network basically took a look at assad's brown skin and name and said they don't think he's worth the money over the white actor who had less screentime and narrative importance (to the season ig) which is absolutely crazy lmao. it shouldn't be controversial to say that and you can't not discuss this without bringing up sam's name. this has nothing to do with whether he "deserved" to be submitted (and even if I said he doesn't deserve it over assad who's gonna beat my ass?). this white man isn't being persecuted by conversations about blatant racism. but I'd expect nothing less from this fanbase x.

[collophora]

haha I'll never finish this

but hewwo new followers <3

[hplonesomeart]

Here you go fellow gays enjoy some tranquil scenery with the favorite fruity robot ever. Spend a late night chatting with him on a balcony as the laughter rings out in the air. Can’t quite get any better then this

[oooocleo]

at some point do we just start a worldwide trade network of images we printed out via the post lol

[kindaorangey]

idk why it's taken me this long to think about it like this but the real reason i don't like 70s/80s era DM in the show timeline is because it's cheating. and i don't mean infidelity, i mean it's a cheap way to cut around all the issues armand and daniel have with each other in the modern day. like it's a massively difficult thing to write these characters getting from point A (armand's life being ruined by daniel and daniel hating armand/being highly distrustful of him) to point B (a sincere romantic relationship) but if you invent a Secret Romantic History That Daniel Forgot But Will Remember then it's a piece of cake for them to forgive each other. but no! i say no! i want the writers to put the work in!!!!

[starlingpaw]

when i'm in your mind

then i'm in your mind

king gizzard and the lizard wizard + warrior cats

[loppiopio]

just some 🥥 related sillies i've made for that fic we all know.

[parin-gurumin]

[silencedrowns]

Cannot believe that for the first time in my life, I found a foundation that is a true perfect undetectable match……. And it’s this. Fucking. THIS.

Chinese SpongeBob makeup. I bought three of this cushion because technically it’s a limited edition (although luckily the same brand, VEECCI, makes non SpongeBob cushion compacts in almost identical color, so I won’t be screwed when the SpongeBob cushion expires). It’s both one of the best foundation formulas I’ve ever tried AND the first true match I’ve had since I started wearing makeup in the late 90s. (for my Missha 13 girlies [gender neutral] where you’re super pale and so muted that your undertone is grey… this one is for you)

sharing this one on tumblr cause I cannot fucking get over the hilarity of my favorite foundation ever being a goddamn SpongeBob collaboration I’m screaming

[lesvegas]

hey so i tried a toast sandwich on a whim and like. its good. im so mad

[lemongrablothbrok]

Classes/School Activities I think each member of Led Zeppelin would excel at/enjoy:

1. Robert: gym, literature, football (soccer) team, choir, sex ed (😉), math (the last one just because he was almost an accountant and then I think he almost became a substitute math teacher after Karac died and he was considering quitting the band?)

2. Bonzo: gym, wood shop, metal shop, any other shop class really, drivers ed, "Motor Enthusiasts Club" (which he started himself 😁)

3. Jonesy: music history, music theory, band, marching band, jazz band, sound director for school plays, backgammon club

4. Jimmy: science, history, track team, band, charms, potions, defense against the dark arts, Dead Poet's Society