#which is basically a comedy of errors

[minecraftbookshelf]

somehow ended up starting a joey pov side fic instead of literally anything else that I already have in progress in this au because...brain chickens be like???

And I keep cracking up because this man is so thirsty and i am so aroace and writing this is the funniest thing to me.

[kanna-kizuchi-enjoyer]

I decided to track my special interests over time. Rough estimates for the time periods

death game x4, death game x2 (in a sense), a comedy anime with little to no depth

I know almost every detail about these three series

[tossawary]

You know, given all of the cloning and other evil experiments that Palpatine apparently had going on, it's a little remarkable in hindsight that he never targeted Shmi Skywalker personally.

Like, this woman apparently reproduced asexually and gave birth to one of the most powerful Force-sensitives of all time; I don't characterize Sith Lords as having great scientific curiosity or a sense of wonder for the universe (or bothering to remember "little" people exist most of the time), because their whole deal kind of precludes that, but it seems reasonable that one might conclude that there's potential power in investigating this.

If Anakin was friendly with Palpatine for the latter half of his childhood, it seems like it could have been relatively easy for Palpatine to learn things like 1) Anakin's midichlorian count (which he can use to tell Anakin that everyone else is just jealous of his power) and 2) Shmi's situation on Tatooine (which he can use to foster resentment between Anakin and the Jedi Order for not helping Shmi too). Just get Anakin a little frustrated and he'll probably start talking! Palpatine could make some concerned offer to send someone to check on Anakin's mother - it is the least that Naboo can do for the family that helped to save them, the Chancellor might say, but he would prefer that such favoritism remain a secret between them - and then Sidious would have Watto's exact address no problem.

And it's not like it would be hard to kidnap Shmi. Palpatine (as Sidious?) could pick some random bounty hunter and order them to go buy her, because this amount of money is presumably pocket change to him, and if Watto resists selling her off to a stranger, the bounty hunter can claim that they've come on behalf of her son. And if that doesn't work or if Shmi is already with the Lars family, there's always violence. Palpatine can just lie to Anakin and say that his agent discovered Shmi was targeted by enemies of the Jedi Order. Oh, what a shame they didn't protect her!

I don't know what would happen from here. Sidious could potentially contract the Kaminoans as a private, anonymous citizen to research Shmi and see if she'll be useful to him at all; the Kaminoans seem to be in the business of designer babies for specific clients (Jango + my vague memories of some "Clone Wars" comic). Which means that Shmi could be unhappily, awkwardly hanging around Kamino, probably still enslaved, when Jango Fett and the clones business is going on. For years, potentially.

Ideally for the Sith, the Kaminoans would be keeping Shmi in an entirely separate facility most of the time, away from the army intended for the Jedi and the Republic. But Jango might be sent around the planet on errands or something and the Kaminoans might need to use very specific equipment at some points, and I am a fan of grand plans being ruined by chance encounters or workplace logistics, so I think it would be fun if Shmi met Jango or Boba. Maybe Palpatine assumed that the Kaminoans had already disposed of Shmi or were keeping her on ice, due to a badly worded email or something else mundane, because the Kaminoan forgot the right Basic word (it's not their first language!!! or a translator malfunctioned or something) during their space phone call.

There's lots of Canon Divergence directions for this, like more serious angst or drama or thriller horror being imprisoned by a Sith Lord (somewhere besides Kamino) or discovering what's being done to the clones. Shmi could end up being rescued by Jedi and helping uncover Sidious. Or she could have a different tragic ending. (This whole post regarding Shmi and cloning is partially inspired by that one post pointing out that Rey looks a lot like Shmi, and given the strange circumstances of Anakin's birth, any attempt to clone Anakin might have created a clone of Shmi instead. I still think a "Rey as Anakin's clone" is a fun sequel trilogy AU.)

I'm leaning towards fix-it and comedies of errors ideas because the prequels are tragic enough for me. Currently, I'm thinking about Shmi eventually ending up as part of young Boba Fett's gang somehow, because it's amusing to me that he was somehow a recurring antagonistic figure on that TCW show despite being a child. The other bounty hunters are like, "Kid, did you... bring your mom on this mission...?" And Boba Fett is like, "No!!! She's my ship mechanic!!! But if you touch her, just so you know, I will fucking kill you."

I think that both Anakin and Boba would fucking hate being adoptive brothers in any way, shape, or form. And the idea of Luke and Leia someday having an "Uncle Boba Fett" is also very funny to me.

(EDIT: I'm currently dubious regarding a Jango/Shmi ship because Jango does participate in the creation and enslavement of the clone army. Like, it's the Kaminoans who do it, they hold most of the blame and they would have gotten someone else if Jango hadn't done it, but Jango is very much there and at the very least complicit in a horrifying series of crimes against millions of people. Depending on how you characterize Shmi Skywalker, an enslaved woman, I don't really think she'd be cool with that. She let her child go off to become a Jedi because she thought it would be a much better life for him, while Jango sold his own "children" off into war for money. So, I'm currently thinking that Shmi might like the innocent child Boba, but she might honestly dislike Jango quite a lot.)

[shadamyheadcanons]

For me, Shadow and Amy's dynamic is basically two different types of touch starved in a person

((If any of the gifs on this post aren’t loading for you on mobile--like they aren’t for me--you can download them or check the sources listed. As for desktop, they play just fine, but they won’t line up next to each other like they do on mobile. Tumblr is a comedy of errors.))

Yes! Absolutely. I’ve seen tons of fans say Shadow is prickly and would respond badly to hugs, but canon says otherwise. This is a bad reaction:

[Sonic 06]

Whenever I feel like being sad, I wonder if Bad-Future-06 Silver has ever been hugged.

This is a bad reaction:

[Sonic Unleashed, gif source.]

And I shouldn’t have to say this, but...yeah. These are very bad reactions:

[Sonic X]

[Sonic Generations]

Yikes. I feel bad for both of them.

But this?

[Sonic Adventure 2, gif source.]

This is Shadow’s only canonical hug in the games, and aside from jumping slightly from being snuck up on, he seems to like it just fine.

Just look at that smile! He’s happy. He finds it endearing.

It was a hug from a complete stranger meant for someone else, but he still drank it in--and, given that he’d effectively just lost Maria, he really did need it. It’s the combination of Amy’s gentleness AND her speech that changed his mind. After all, if someone as sweet as her sees something in the humans, maybe they’re not so bad.

My buddy who runs @shadowxamyweek recently reblogged a post about this hug, and their tags sum it up perfectly:

[ID: A screenshot of tags on a post. The tags read:

#official art #4kids #shadow the hedgehog #amy rose #YEAH 😭 #listen I read nothing that has happened with them in SA2 as shippy - and i ship them #THIS HUG? THR SPEECH ON THE ARK? #those are two lonely kids #those are two left behind kids #those are two kids so desperate for affection #for two vastly different reasons #Amy loves with her whole chest and will never stop doing so- no matter what happens #and Shadow does too- that is key to remember- Shadow loves... so fucking much... that it hurts #you are RIGHT op when you say this is probably the first time someone has been gentle with him in a long long time #he doesn't even run away #in the game- when Amy flees- he takes a step after her- a moment's hesitation- a 'wait' #this kid NEEDED a hug #and i firmly believe part of the reason Shadow listens to Amy in the end is BECAUSE she is the only person who showed him gentleness #softness and kindness and affection #if only for a moment #fjdodhdofjgor THIS is what i mean when i say 'be gentle- be kind' #it MATTERS #it FUCKING MATTERS

End ID]

Shadow doesn’t hate hugs inherently; it’s just that no one hugs him in the first place...

...aside from one person.

Amy’s easily the most affectionate character in the cast. It’s cute at first glance, but there’s a common thread to every instance that puts a damper on it.

She’s always, ALWAYS the initiator.

She puts more into each hug than anyone else does.

She’s always the last to pull away.

The most reciprocated Amy hug I know of in canon is this one:

[IDW Sonic issue #22]

Which is absolutely adorable...but Amy still initiated. Because it’s always her job. Even the characters who like affection don’t need it the way she does...with one exception.

And this tiny detail just killed me. The little, “wait, come back 😟”

It’s the only time I know of when someone has actually stepped after her like this. In a game where everyone left Amy behind, he wanted to follow her. Mister so-called-prickly didn’t want the hug to end.

Because he’s the only one who needs it as much as she does.

He wants to be held as much as she wants to hold someone else, and no one else is warm and sincere enough for it. Compare these instances:

[IDW issue #6]

Sonic thinks Shadow is wrong about something, so he grabs Shadow’s arm to stop him, and Shadow aggressively wrenches it away and leaves.

[Archie Sonic Universe #23]

But when Amy thinks Shadow is wrong about something and grabs his arm to stop him, he gently removes her hand and thinks about what she has to say.

Even when he doesn’t want to be touched, he makes the distinction between “don’t touch me” and “not right now, please.” These are from two different continuities, of course, but I think the point stands. Amy’s special. He’s gentler with her than he is with other people, and that’s consistent across all canons.

Side note: how often does Amy get to feel special like that? I actually really like that Sonic doesn’t place others in a hierarchy of importance, and I wouldn’t change that about him even if I could...

[IDW issue #2]

...but Amy does play favorites. I want her to feel like she’s someone else’s favorite, too. I want her to have someone who puts her first and likes her best. I think Shadow’s more than capable of that. I believe he craves clinginess like hers deep down, even if he hasn’t consciously figured that out yet.

I have an entire tag for these two being affectionate. My favorite is probably this one.

Of course, there may be those who say I’m reading too much into one (1) hug. And you know what? Maybe they’re right! We need a bigger sample size. Sega, make more characters hug Shadow, please. Let Rouge comfort him after he confides in her about something. Have Omega give him an awkward metal embrace because he read on the internet that organic beings like that kind of thing. Make Shadow himself pull Silver into a hug when he’s breaking down crying from the stress of always having to be a hero. Show Tails accidentally grab onto him out of fear when they’re trapped in a lightning storm, and when he gets embarrassed and pulls away, have Shadow hold him for the rest of the storm and admit he’s not fond of bright lights, either.

[Sonic Boom]

That scene where Shadow and Amy rescue Cream and Cheese from Cryptic Castle? That easily could’ve turned into a cute group hug.

[Shadow the Hedgehog (2005)]

And I have seen some absolutely adorable fanart where he holds Cream’s hand while he and Amy lead her through Cryptic Castle to make sure she doesn’t get lost 🥺

Have Knuckles give him an empathetic bro-pat on the shoulder when he finds out Shadow’s the last one of his race, too.

[Archie Sonic Universe #89]

Have Sonic try to hug him, and then when Shadow inevitably pushes him away and says he doesn’t do hugs, have Amy arrive and latch onto Shadow instead while he tries to stutter out an excuse as to why she’s allowed to and Sonic isn’t.

The most affection Shadow has in recent history is stuff like this...

[Sonic Prime season 2 episode 1]

...where Sonic tries to hug him and Shadow immediately pushes him away, knocks him over, and tries to punch him in the face. Kind of says it all. Amy stands out as the only one with a good track record here.

[IDW issue #36]

Especially when you have him look at her like this when someone else is on the receiving end of that affection.

So in the absence of further evidence, I have no choice but to interpret this in the most Shadamy way possible. Your move, Sega.

[formosusiniquis]

A Steddie / Buckingham comedy of errors of sorts. It goes like this.

Robin thinks Chrissy Cunningham might be her non platonic soulmate. She's smart, a little goofy, observant, seems like a great listener, and after what the rumor mill is saying was a pretty intense summer has really come into her own. It's a shame she went straight from dating Jason to Eddie Munson.

"She said she's working on herself," Steve claims, more in tune with the gossip than she is, "pretty hypocritical of you to say guys and girls can't be friends."

Which is pretty hypocritical of him when she knows he only cares cause he's already planning his wedding to Chrissy's new boyfriend; he needs Eddie to be single otherwise he's pining away for his perfect co-babysitter for nothing.

But it doesn't matter if they are dating or if they aren't or if Chrissy Cunningham with her perfect strawberry blonde ponytail is her soulmate, because her parents keep trying to set her up with some friend of a friend. She needs to do something quick before disaster strikes.

Melissa and Richard Buckley still know how to tie one on, when the occasion strikes. They're parents now, they've settled down some. Given in to the picket fence life, keep their yard mowed so Gayle Collins down the way stops glaring. They haven't done anything really crazy since that weekend they left Robin with Minerva and went to see what that whole Woodstock thing was about. Now they mostly just stick to getting as high as they can and stargazing on the weekends that Robin is off with Steve, a sweet boy kind of a square but the brownie recipe he gave them makes the best edibles.

Melissa can tell her daughter is lonely, she notices a lot of things about Robin that she won't tell them. Richard has noticed that their dealer Eddie has started bringing a friend along with him. Eddie is a sweet boy too, raised well respects his elders something they care about now that they've become them, he is also obviously and fantastically gay. Like all the parents in Hawkins, Richard and Melissa have heard how Wayne Munson has taken in that Cunningham girl after she came back from her trip out of state. Melissa remembers being a vaguely out of control youth and knows that a trip out of state is code for one of two things, and Chrissy doesn't look like she's ever been pregnant. Chrissy seems like a girl who might like their daughter.

Steve would die before he denies Robin just about anything. She is the platonic love of his life, they nearly died together, they've come out together. He's pretty sure as long as he has Robin and his kids he'd be content for the rest of his life, romance be damned.

A sentiment Robin seems to agree with since she wants him to fake being her boyfriend. Obviously, he says yes. Steve is a good boyfriend, he's always been a good boyfriend. He's attentive, great with parents, knows when to keep the pda to a minimum but also knows when to put on a show. He used to be pretty sure that Mr. and Mrs. Buckley liked him. So he's not really sure why they pulled him aside before movie night.

"Your parents hate me."

"There isn't a parent in Hawkins who hates you."

"You mom just asked me if I didn't think it might be better if I found someone more suited to me."

"What does that even mean?"

"It's basically mom code for I think your the worst person my daughter could have brought home. If I had the choice I'd kill you so why don't you do us both a favor and fuck off."

"I don't think that's right."

"Rob, I love you but conversational nuance isn't exactly your thing."

Eddie likes his job. Sure it's technically not honest work, but who knows maybe down the line they'll legalize it. He's getting in on the ground floor, an entrepreneur. Hawkins is surprisingly pro-weed and Eddie is just fine sticking to that after this summer. His favorite customers are the old folks. Like Miss Brenda at the library or the Buckleys. He always brings Chrissy along when he goes out these days, she feels weird staying in the trailer by herself and he likes having her nearby. She puts people at ease.

Except the Buckleys, who seem strangely obsessed with her. They ask her pointed questions about Dorothy, and surely they mean an actual Dorothy, surely the nice middle aged couple aren't trying to figure out if Chrissy is queer. Sure he got some vibes off of Buckley the younger, but that was before she started dating the love of his life. Now he's starting to think his whole gaydar has gone to shit.

Chrissy, a baby gay who has just broken free of the nastiest case of comp het Eddie has ever seen, answer honestly. She doesn't know a Dorothy, is that one of Robin's band friends? How is Robin, she is so sweet. Chrissy just wishes she had more time in the day so they could see each other more. She's dating Steve right, they make just the cutest couple, don't they think?

Eddie can tell Melissa doesn't. A surprise when even Wayne likes Steve Harrington, thinks he's the bees knees. Loaned him a screwdriver or some shit when the guy was over fixing something at the Mayfield place. She smiles though and agrees that Steve is quite sweet, in a tone that Eddie is far more used to hearing used when people are talking about him than about Steve Harrington. He blinks and the next thing he knows Chrissy is agreeing for them both that dinner on Friday sounds lovely; she'll bring a dessert.

Like she's ever baked in her life.

Chrissy Cunningham has had a rough couple of months, but she's settled now. Sure, she had a breakdown so bad in Eddie's trailer that she ended up having to get professional help; but she got that help and a new support system for herself. Really, the only way life could be much better is if she were dating Robin Buckley.

Eddie likes to tease her, calls her a baby gay like she's a wobbly legged deer still figuring things out. She's had eyes on Robin since the fifth grade, when she got her hair cut short to her shoulders the first time and her teeth still had a gap before her braces went on. Steve is a great guy, she's seen him with the group of freshmen that follow him around like ducklings; she's also watching him now and he's spent most of dinner making moon eyes at Eddie instead of his girlfriend.

She doesn't understand how, Robin is a vision. Full of spit and vinegar, she is firecracker mad glaring at her parents across the table. "You really brought him here? I'm dating Steve, can you not accept that?"

A lot happens at once, Chrissy isn't entirely sure what is going on but it feels a lot like a pot boiling over, something left too long unattended.

"We aren't trying to set you up with our dealer," Mr. Buckley said. "You're not exactly his type."

"Chrissy is such a nice girl." Mrs. Buckley tries.

"You said you stopped that," Steve to Eddie, a lethal pout on his lips and downturned eyes.

"Well, I stopped with the kids," Eddie tries, "I gotta pay the bills somehow, sweetheart."

"Chrissy?" If Robin was a vision in her sharp eyed rage, she's radiant in her pink cheeked surprise.

Once the shock, surprise, and comedy wear off Chrissy thinks there will be tears. Robin's parents seem nice. They seem like the kind of parents you confide in and who hold you tight. She thinks about her mom doing something thoughtful, thinks of her quietly accepting who she is and who she loves; and when she can't do that she thinks of Wayne and Eddie and knows she'd cry once they were alone and the theater of it all was over. So she thinks she might need to make the most of her moment while it's there. "I don't want to be a homewrecker," she jokes, something she's picked up from Eddie, "but I think your boyfriend has his eyes other places."

"Boyfriend, what boyfriend?"

"They're showing Clue at The Hawk this weekend, if you want to go with me?"

Robin can't nod her head fast enough.

"Stevie, I noticed you find yourself newly single," Eddie says, sorrow so fake he should rethink his decision to go within 10 feet of the drama department. "If you could bear it, would you want to crash their date make it a double?"

Steve agrees so fast a bit of hair escapes his coif, it falls in a curl at his forehead.

Robin's parents both seem pleased, pleasant smiles that chrissy is becoming more accustomed to seeing on adults now that she resides in the Munson place. "They'll be smug about this forever," Robin confides. Her smile betrays her lack of real dismay.

Chrissy got her girl and her best friend got his boy, so she thinks it's all's well that ends well.

[consanguinitatum]

David Tennant as Jack Absolute in The Rivals....aaawwwww yeah!

So I've spent some time today working getting distracted on looking up some information in my The Comedy Of Errors programme for my next A Tennantcy To Act Substack post about mistakes, injuries and basic silliness DT's done on stage. While doing so, I saw some photos in the programmes...which of course meant I had to start scanning those buggers. Right? Right. I then had to pull out all of my DT theatre programmes to scan the photos in them...and, well. Distraction complete. Anyyyyway, these beauties of DT as Jack Absolute in The Rivals just can't go unseen (all photos by John Haynes):

[bogkeep]

"hi haiz how's your watchmaker placement going"

it's going very well thank you, except for the fact that im currently stuck in a comedy of errors but it's fine it's fine i'll fix it ,

so i've been looking at a couple old chronographs, right. basically they're mechanical watches but with a stopwatch mechanism on top, so they're pretty complicated with a lot of moving parts and adjustments. i'm learning a lot from working on them!!

first i look at chronograph #1 which is the most vintage of the bunch, and it takes me a couple trial and errors to figure out how to put it together with only my own photos for reference -

(that's so many screws to keep track of oh god.) BUT I MANAGE. AND IT SEEMS TO TICK ALONG... until it suddenly doesn't????

i decide to take a break from it and look at chronograph #2, which i have a much easier time with and seem to get going real well!!! until i'm about to put the hands back on and find out. that i managed to break the seconds wheel pinion when i removed the hand it connected to. in the very beginning of the process. soooooo that one is put on hold until we get in a replacement part. fun! fun.

so i go back to chronograph #1 in the meantime. a colleague thinks it's the center wheel that's the problem, so i dissassemble the watch only a little bit to take a look, but it seems fine. when i put it back on the watch starts ticking again! maybe it was just a hiccup of some s- no wait it stopped again. with a sigh, i decide to start over again, put all the parts in the wash again because i've fiddled so much with it the lubrication is probably completely off, and

PROBLEM IDENTIFIED

usually you'd replace the whole spring barrel if you have one. but the problem with vintage watches, especially of more obscure brands, is that you're unlikely to have that at hand. but that's fine, i'm not getting paid to be here nor am i doing work for actual clients so i can absolutely spend a whole day doing This:

GOOD AS NEW!!!!!!

all i need to do now is put everything in the wash and assemble everhthing and definitely not break another part immediately!!!

...

you'll never guess what happened

you probably can't tell but the pinion is supposed to be much longer. it was poking out of the cleaning basket and when i tried to pull it out of the cage i heard a snap. just the worst!!!! why am i breaking everything!!!!!

anyway ive decided to take a shot at making a whole new pinion for the seconds counter wheel

which is scary because it has a VERY LONG THIN PART THAT LOVES TO BREAK. this photo is from my second try because my strategy on the first was not very stable.

i spent my whole day doing just this side of it!!!!!!!

AND WHEN I STARTED WORKING ON THE OTHER SIDE. GUESS WHAT. GUESS FUCKING WHAT. IT BROKE! i should have seen it coming

YOU LIVE AND YOU LEARN thank god tomorrow is a bank holiday i need to lie down

one day i shall conquer the chronographs.

[inbabylontheywept]

Master Post of Writings and Series

HFY Science Fiction That Isn't a Ship, It's a Cannon with FTL! Military fiction revolving around space pirates and a railgun someone strapped an FTL drive to. There are three parts, the link above should let you scroll through the whole series. Like Sharks A short fic based on the prompt "Humans are the only ones to actually develop FTL. Everyone else just uses wormholes." The Scattering Experimental piece. I normally do prose, but I tried a poem. Inspired by the Dark Forest Theory. "So...What's the biggest gun you've ever made?" First installment starring Earl, a weapons designer. In this episode he explains the basics of fission-based fusion weapons, their applications in throwing things into orbit. Also stars a horny lobsterman. "R&D? More like R&Deez Nuts" Second installment starring Earl. This is a laser tag fight starring the R&D division, accounting, and sales. There will be male bonding. Or else. "Yeah, sure, and I shit thermite. Be serious." Earl drinks until he pukes. Aliens learn that humans produce hydrochloric acid for digestion. The Vengabus is Coming! A pinned down group of soldiers has to call in a human tank for backup. Shock and awe does not begin to describe it. Hold Your Breath and Burn The bad news is that he's gonna die in space. The good news is that he can make it count. "I will solve you if I must." The last tool of diplomacy is threats. Burning Bridges You don't have to kill a soldier to keep them from being a combatant. "I think we underestimated the scale of the human species by eight or nine orders of magnitude." In which humans turn out to be the swarm. Party Favors Humanity solved mortality. It did not solve boredom. Now it's everyone's problem. Starring my creepiest humans, a lot of drugs, and the leasy sexy descriptions of sex I could make.

HFY Fantasy Small, Fragile, and Destined to Die There's something to be said for spitting in the face of death. Sometimes, literally. "Healing+Lightning=Wizard Launcher" Unconventional spell uses let a wizard punch above his weight. And bite. And kick. Human wizards make a lot of ruckus. An Honorary Troll A wizard fights a troll. It is not a very wizardly fight. I considered it a very loose sequel to the story above it, but both can absolutely be read separately. Dale of the Dales A two part series about a human protecting a town of halflings from an army of gnomes with the power of hospitality, and also being comparatively massive. Why Human's Can't Cast On the properties of superconductors and golden gods. The Thunder God of Honnillee A human is adopted by a halfling. What Talon and What Dreadful Claw Tragedy with a man and a spynx.

Unsorted Fictions Leviathan A necromancer scours the depths of hell for a soul worthy of his creation. He finds more than he bargained for. Odysseus in Space (It's very, very good) Biographical Pieces Soviet Birds A comedy of errors is resolved by the Vessel of Bird Sacrifice. The Kitchen Labyrinth of Missile Science Why does a classified facility with 30 people at it have 7 kitchens? What would you do if I told you it has seven of every kind of room? The Fridges. Oh my God, the Fridges. It also has 20 fridges in it. Obviously. Kevin vs. Intro to Quantum You would be surprised at the kind of intellectual challenges random bystanders can take. I certainly was. Layman walks in and becomes the class mascot. The Condom Bomber In which I fuck up. Videos None of these are narrated by me, but I thought I'd list them here for anyone that prefers listening to reading. Like Sharks, read by Grey Voice. He focuses on smooth reading. Like Sharks, read by Aggro Squirrel. He has a theatrical voice. Like Sharks, read by NetNarrator. He has a fast, clipped style. The Vengabus is Coming & Burning Bridges 2 for 1 by Aggro Squirrel. "Yeah, and I shit thermite. Be serious." by Net Narrator. "So, what's the biggest gun you've ever made?" by Aggro Squirrel.

[sadlynotthevoid]

Guys, I just had a very crack thought: LCF fic that is a Barbie: A Fashion Fairytale AU, except Og!Cale is Barbie and Arm is the rival copycat boutique.

This means:

—Since og!Cale is basically Barbie, instead of being famous he was infamous. He was really good at his job (if you haven't seen the movie, in this one Barbie was an actress who got in an argument with the director, which ends with her fired), but he had a really bad reputation so everyone thought he's a bad person with talent. He still has fans because he's iconic and has amazing acting skills, but no one is surprised when he gets fired and so.

—This is a modern AU and Og!Cale has his own acting career, therefore there isn't a big succession trouble (for him to solve) like in canon. He just said he was going to be an actor and the head of the company trainment went to the only child who wasn't too opposed to the position: Bassen.

—Where does his bad reputation come from then? He pissed off someone, who decided to ruin his reputation in an attempt to make him miserable, but he just thought this was funny and convenient, so he let it be. "I can insult so many people like this" Insult = being rude but honest.

—Kent can be either Alberu or Kim Rok Soo. I prefer Alberu, but having Rok Soo go through a comedy of errors because he accidentally broke up with his bf is equally funny. In the other side, making a basically modern prince travel in the most low budget and gradually worst ways (because he couldn't get a first class flight fast enough) to recover him is fantastic of Cale's part.

—Aunt Millicent is Olienne because he's his godfather here.

I'm going to go back at this later but I want breakfast first.

[guzhuangheaven]

Hi, could you talk about the marriage of imperial princes? Specifically the children of the current emperor. We can see this in Ruyi (it's been a while since I watched and forgive any mistakes) when Hongli was still a prince he had the ability to "choose" his wife, no matter how much Noble Consort Xi influenced him to choose Lady Fucha. Later we see him agreeing to Noble Consort Jia's request to marry Yongcheng to Prince Heyi's daughter, I can't forget Yonghuang who was resentful that his wife was from a lower flag. So I had this doubt, why did some princes have this opportunity to "choose" while others didn't?

sorry for my english

Well, choose is a strong word.

There is a distinction between the circumstances where Hongli chooses his wife and Yongcheng choosing his wife.

Ok, the ceremony we see where Hongli(‘s mother) choose Langhua, Xiyue and Hongli chooses Qingying as his wife is part of a much larger ritual, called xuan xiunu (selecting honoured ladies). Xuan xiunu is a ritual that takes place every three years, and in dramas it’s usually to select new concubines for the emperor (i.e. how Zhen Huan, Meizhuang et al. were selected). However, in reality, xuan xiunu is not just to choose wives for the emperor, it’s a much more complex process to select:

Yes, potential new concubines for the emperors

But also wives for princes and imperial relatives who the emperor may want to bestow (usually political) marriages on

But also high ranking maids to serve in positions close to women of the imperial family, including current consorts, consort dowagers, empress dowager etc. There are levels to being palace maids, and the highest level dealing closely with ranked persons would be more akin to positions of ladies in waiting, which in western history were also high-ranked women chosen to serve the Queen (in this case also high ranking imperial consorts and the empress).

(Contrary to what is portrayed in dramas, you can't just beat palace maids to death nilly willy with no repercussions like Hua Fei with Fuzi, especially maids who were serving close to higher ranks. There are consequences - see Qianlong's Dun Fei.)

There is a short subplot early in Bu Bu Jing Xin where Ruoxi, the daughter of a general and sister to the Eighth Prince’s secondary consort, is supposed to be a candidate in the xuan xiunu ceremony. While the Eighth Prince was able to use his connections to get her out of the list to be potential concubine to the emperor (Kangxi) and for marriages to the princes, she was nevertheless chosen for a guannuzi position serving the emperor himself.

(There’s a whole comedy of errors where the goal actually was to get Ruoxi to be not chosen for any position at all, but then too many princes suddenly took an interest in getting her out of lists that the consorts dealing with the selection started getting suspicious and competitive among themselves on who gets to keep her and then she becomes the emperor’s maid anyway, which they had been desperate to avoid because even though Kangxi hasn’t shown any romantic interest in Ruoxi, never say never.)

Guannuzi is a position that can potentially become a concubine to the emperor – a palace maid raised to the position of guannuzi can wait on the emperor overnight and in harem drama it’s equal to basically becoming the emperor’s concubine in all but name. Yu Ying’er and Songzhi in Legend of Zhen Huan were both raised from palace maids to guannuzi for this reason. But in BBJX it’s made clear that the position itself doesn’t have to be a concubine position, and Ruoxi was just the emperor’s tea maid.

High ranking maids like Ruoxi (and I guess dowry maids of the consorts we see in dramas like Ruyi and Zhen Huan) could be bestowed good marriages later as reward for their service as well.

Anyway. Back to Hongli. His wives were chosen in the xuan xiunu ceremony because the time of marriage happened to fall on the same period as a xuan xiunu ceremony was taking place. And by the time you get to that shortlist who gets to meet Xi Fei, there has already a whole load of selection and cuts being made off-screen. Everyone knows going in that both the Emperor and Xi Fei thinks Langhua is most suitable and the whole selection on Hongli’s part is jus ceremonial. He probably deludes himself into thinking he did have a right to choose Qingying/Ruyi if he wanted to, but honestly it would have been a bad move politically. At that point, even Yongzheng probably didn’t want him to choose Qingying, who has already been rejected by Hongshi. If disaster hadn’t struck with Hongshi and Ruyi’s aunt at that point, driving Qingying’s family into disgrace, if Hongli had insisted on choosing Qingying in that moment against his mother’s clear wishes, Xi Fei wouldn’t be able to say anything against it as at that point, Qingying was the empress’s niece. But it would not have been a good political move on his part and would have made things bad for Qingying anyway.

With Yongcheng, he is of an age to be married, but no xuan xiunu ceremony was due any time soon, in that case the emperor can just choose someone(‘s daughter) that he knows to bestow in marriage on his sons – same for Yongqi. Yuyan knew that Qianlong was thinking about Yongcheng’s marriage at that point, so she not so slyly suggested who she wanted, without realising that she was challenging the emperor in doing that and showing herself to be too arrogant for her own good. I think the idea was that Qianlong had someone lower in mind for Yongcheng but Yuyan thought that only a woman descended from Kangxi’s daughter was suitable. Yongcheng didn’t resent his wife for being lowborn, he resented his wife for being too high born and feeling like she shouldn’t be paying respect to a disgraced concubine, even though she still owes that to Yuyan as her mother in law regardless.

I think in the novel, Qianlong also deliberately chose women from lower ranking clans for both Yonghuang and Yongqi in hope that it would not make it too obvious how he was considering them both at different points as heirs (probably learning from his own situation where it was obvious where he was headed with Langhua being chosen as his consort), but it was Yonghuang that had a problem with that as well IIRC.

[aimmyarrowshigh]

My dearest, darling Aim, do you happen any thoughts and/or comments about that new Velma show that just came out, because it just sounds horrific and I made the fatal error of watching about a minute of some cisgender white dude's critic of it on youtube and I'm more than a LITTLE FROTHY about how he was basically 'Welp, that's what happens when you try to shoehorn the remake of a classic show into being more ethnically diverse and it's like that because Mindy Kaling is dumpy and unattractive.'

::THE HEAVIEST OF SIGHS::

As a disclaimer before my comments: I have not watched it and I don't plan to watch it. Basically as soon as I saw the first trailer, I said, "This was not made for me, a person who loves Velma and Scooby-Doo."

Because that's the thing -- it was not made for people who love Velma and Scooby-Doo. It was made for people who don't think loving anything is cool, and specifically, who think "nostalgia poisoning" is a thing and want to "ruin your childhoods" because "it's time to grow up" or whatever. It exists in the same vein of humor as the last ten years of South Park, or Seth Macfarlane's whole career, where the only comedy thesis is, "If you care about anything, you're a rube."

Because it's not just Velma and Scooby-Doo that the new show takes potshots at. It's also true crime fans (who are pretty much only women), it's Other Girls (shown to be vapid "bitches" AKA Daphne), it's people with mental illness, it's adult cartoon watchers as a whole, it's people who genuinely want diversified television, it's the idea of friendship. And it's ALSO people who hate true crime fans, and people who hate Other Girls, and people who hate diversified television. Because there is no "right way" to watch the show. There's no underlying person you can be as an audience member and NOT be shit on by the show.

If you hate that they made Velma Desi, then the show is going to shit on you for it, but not because you're a bigoted loser -- but because you care about something.

If you hate that they made Velma an odious quasi-fascist with a serious streak of internalized misogyny, the show is going to shit on you -- because you care about something.

The only way to be "cool," in the vein of comedy that HBO Velma exists within, is to aggressively not care about anything. But don't Not Care too aggressively! Because that circles back around to caring about seeming cool, and that's not cool!

And I'm gonna be honest:

Mindy Kaling has always had a problem with desperately, desperately wanting to be seen as cool. (See title of autobiography, 'Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me?')

In the 2000s, when she was in Hasty Pudding (iirc) and the youngest writer on The Office -- a show which DOES NOT HOLD UP in 2023; if you still think The Office is hilarious in 2023 I find you a DEEPLY suspicious person -- it seemed revolutionary and rebellious to openly be a non-thin, nerdy girl and say, "I really wish I were cool." And it was, for the time! That WAS revolutionary and rebellious! It's what built Mindy Kaling's career (and also Tina Fey's, another writer whose work Does Not Hold Up in 2023).

And in the 2010s, with The Mindy Project, being an adult woman who wrote frankly about desperately wanting to be cool was kind of fresh-ish, and the ways that Mindy's character undermined herself to try to get what she wanted felt if not relevant, then unfortunately relatable for a lot of people. But she also ends up with a dude character who, in the FIRST EPISODE, calls her fat. To her face. Many times. It's never addressed again, and it's not played as a dealbreaker... obviously. Because she ends up with someone who fundamentally doesn't respect or like her. But she ends up with somebody! And that's what matters! Because it's cool to have a boyfriend!

In the 2020s, Mindy's shtick is extremely outdated, at best, and is an active choice by Mindy to be harmful, at worst (and frankly, with Velma, most likely). Mindy's shtick is not, "Some girls aren't cool, and that's okay." It's literally, "If you're a girl who isn't cool, that's not okay."

And that's THE FUCKING OPPOSITE OF THE POINT OF VELMA DINKLEY.

I've seen a lot of posts that are either comparisons or contrasts with Netflix's Wednesday, and I don't really have a dog in that fight because like, I enjoyed the unintentional sapphic vibes of Wednesday a lot and I thought Jenna Ortega was great, but the show as a whole fundamentally misunderstands The Addams Family, so I'm overall like, "eh." BUT. What both the comparisons and the contrasts of Wednesday and Velma hinge on is this:

Neither show understands, or cares, why the characters they're based on are beloved in the first place. They don't actually want to interact with the source material, and they don't actually want to court fans of the source material. If anything, they want fans of the source material to avoid the show so that the streaming service they're on can have a young, hip demo tuning in.

And what they don't understand about Wednesday and Velma... is that the reason they're beloved... is that they like who they are.

Wednesday is macabre, but she's a happy kid. She likes what she likes. She gleefully electrocutes Pugsley not because she likes causing pain, but because it's fascinating to see what electrocution does. She beheads her dolls and then sleeps with both pieces in her arms. She studies the Bermuda Triangle because it's fucking interesting that whole-ass ships and planes disappear! She likes the things she likes. She likes who she is. She LIKES THINGS. She's not miserable or misanthropic or nihilist. The line that Wednesday most got right of Wednesday's dialogue was "no one gets to torture [Pugsley] except me," because she's a fierce protector and an Addams, first and foremost.

(Insert 96-paragraph rant here about how The Addams Family (2019) and The Addams Family: The Musical also fundamentally misunderstand this about Wednesday, the musical perhaps worst of all. Wednesday does not want to be normal. She just doesn't want to be perky.)

Velma is a nerd and a dork and a geek, and she could not be happier about it! She's gonna kick your ass at the science fair! She will correct the grammar of your 'kick me' sign on her back and return it with red pen! She's a skeptic not because she hates caring about things or hates belief, but because she loves learning and she loves evidence. The only girl that Velma has ever had any negative relationship with that I can recall is that she and Marcie Fleach had some tension because they were equally smart and smart people sometimes compete to be The Smartest, but then in the end THEY WERE IN LOVE AND GIANT LESBIANS. And then Marcie got murdered by a paranormally enhanced parrot, but whatever.

There's a REASON why there's never been -- until this HBO show -- a whiff of jealousy that Daphne is traditionally beautiful or that Fred adores her. (I mean, part of that is that Velma is a lesbian, but also VELMA DOESN'T WANT TO BE DAPHNE, SHE WANTS TO BE VELMA.) The only "love triangle" that the Scooby gang has ever had was literally INCLUDING THE DOG, because Velma does not hate anything about Daphne or who Daphne is. She celebrates who Daphne is. She loves who Daphne is. She would never, ever, ever call Daphne a bitch.

But here's the thing: I genuinely don't think that Mindy Kaling can conceive of a weird girl being happy with who they are.

I don't know if it's a generational, grew-up-in-the-80s thing, or an effect of racism she experienced as a Desi girl, or because she's frequently been the only woman in a comedy writers' room, or if she just as a defective personality.

But I think she looked at Velma and said, "This girl makes no sense unless she's miserable, angry, and maladjusted."

And I think Tim Burton looked at Wednesday and said the same thing. But I also think Tim Burton looks at literally all women always and says that, so whatever.

I think Mindy Kaling deeply, deeply hates herself. And she can't write female characters who don't also deeply hate themselves.

But that's not Velma.

[skulkingwriter]

Oh my god.

TLDR: I've just encountered a meme in the wild for the first time and now my toddler is looking at me like I've lost my mind

Long version: so my son has become obsessed with Donald and Daisy Duck. He has loved ducks since he was old enough to identify a duck, duck was basically his first word, he loves a duck. So it's not a big surprise that Donald and Daisy went down a storm when we met them in Fantasia 2000, where they have an epic and moving comedy of errors on Noah's Ark to the tune of Land of Hope And Glory. (They both think the other has drowned. They are utterly inconsolable until they find each other again, at which point I weep my own tears. This deeply dramatic attachment to each other may come into play later in this story.) 

This was only his second exposure to the classic Disney animals because the Sorcerer's Apprentice is in the original Fantasia and we watched it first. Then, two beloved friends gave him a Brio train with Donald and Daisy figures, associating them with a SECOND form of very beloved transport, and cementing them as a) very important friends who we love and b) inseparable from each other.  

Yesterday, he asked for Donald and Daisy on the telly, so we had that section of Fantasia 2000 again. And then he asked for MORE Donald and Daisy. And for a moment, life was made of WOE. Because I was certain, given we have the Disney channel, this could be achieved. But I was not raised on the Disney Friends (princesses and other movies yes, mickey no) so the best I could do was type in 'donald' and 'daisy' into the search. TRAGICALLY, we could not find a single program that had Donald AND Daisy in the thumbnail, though there were plenty of Donald only and a smattering of Daisy-only and a few misc Ducks, and if you remember the first chapter of this epic you will know that it is VITALLY IMPORTANT that Donald and Daisy not be separated! My son WEPT INCONSOLABLY at the idea of watching a Donald cartoon without Daisy in it.  

And then, AND THEN, I spotted that in the background of the thumbnails for something called Mickey's Clubhouse, there was a group of characters including both Donald and Daisy! SUCCESS. So now we watch Mickey's Clubhouse even though it's slightly annoying and they use thinks like 'hot diggity dog' and 'mouseketools', it's at least high budget nonsense and better than fucking Blippi, who thinks Pluto is a planet and seems to make new Youtube accounts faster than I can block them. 

It's a success! Donald and Daisy are both here! They are clearly secondary characters, but it's good enough! And there's a fun but deeply odd mechanic with these 'mouseketools' where we take along three weird objects and have a slot left for a mystery object that will assist during the latter stages of the plot. 

At which point I, a very online but not very Disney-literate 40 year old, laugh for like three minutes and my son thinks I have finally relinquished my tenuous grip on reality. 

Or to put it another way: 

[mejomonster]

I just wrote a long post on how i checked out cooking crush and how its actually really good and way more my thing than i expected (since i normally dont click with romcoms)

But tumblr errored out and destroyed it so.

Anyway. Its offgun doing great, its sexuality written in way more realistic nuanced ways present throughout, its tropes used in ways to enhance the characters and how theyd naturally grow closer anyway given a chance rather than Leaning on needing the tropes, its got bisexuals, it feels more slice of life than romcom (which is why im clicking so good with it) and a lot of the most comedic bits remind me off the offgun show they used to do and interview people in like a slumber party and games thing, in the best its-offgun-showing off their strength way without it detracting from the plot (as in the romance is built in the more genuine acted moments and the comedy is placed in a way thats fun and not jarring or too clashing in how its contained). Basically in all respects its surpassed anything i expected and im actually loving it. The plots itself also feel more slice of life then exagerated backdrop, which uh for my tastes just made it a lot easier to buy into personally.

[ananke-xiii]

My ranking of SPN seasons (based only on their PLOT) pt. 4 [final]

OKAAAAAY, LEEEEET'S GO!

Here, here and here I've covered from ranking #15 to #4 so let's see which seasons will be on the podium!

3. Season 8: This season really gave me life, it's absolutely one of the best. Plot-wise, I ADORED the introduction of the tablets and the Trials, whoever came up with this idea was pure genius. So Basically our heroes have to deal with the aftermath of the events in season 7: Dean has spent 1 year fighting monsters in Purgatory while Sam run away from his responsibilities and has found shelter in the arms of a woman. Cas seems nowhere to be found. The character who moves the plot forward is my beloved Crowley: while Dean was feeling pure in Purgatory with this vampire boyfriend (ihih), and Sam was guitl-trapped into adopting a dog (seriuosly? biggest red flag ever), our King of Hell was busy carrying the show on his shoulders. He kidnaps Kevin and orders him to translate the demon tablet. Since he's not stupid, he quickly understands that 1 leviathan table + 1 demon tablet = 1 angel tablet. Consequently, his quest for the latter begins. After 1 year of hedonism, our heroes realize that they had left poor Kevin behind while an astonished Castiel comes out of nowhere. The plot gets interesting. We find out that the demon tablet contains information on how to close the Gates of Hell. Comedy of error ensues since literally everybody thinks that the angle tablet would contain the same info as the demon tablet (really, guys? The ONLY smart person in the room about this was DEAN, as per usual). So what's written on the angel tablet? Surprise! We don't really know 'cause poor Kevin spent 6 effing months trying to translate half of the demon tablet so there's now way to know now! Cas makes the usual stupid choice and gets played by Metatron: he will undergo the Three Trials to close the Gates of Heaven. Meanwhile poor Sam undergoes the Trials to close the Gates of Hell. Eventually, Dean convinces him to stop the last trial otherwise he will die and poor Dean cannot live without his baby brother (same goes for little jealous Sam who, while literally dying, finds time to tell Dean that he feels left behind because Dean seems to love his Purgatory vampire and his trenchoated angel more than him (codependecy level: atomic)). Metatron fools everyone and cast a spell to make all angels fall. BOOM, season finale is EPIC. I really really enjoyed this season, it was so rich and full of turns of events but everything was coherent and engaging. What I didn't like is brainwashing Cas via Naomi. Plot-wise, it was unnecessary since Naomi literally reveals her original plan to Dean after episode 17 so, what was the point? Sure it gave us the memorable crypt scene and for it I am forever grateful. But in terms of plot, meh. It was weak. Also, it looks a lot like what happened with Godstiel in season 6 AND weird Cas in season 7 (poor Cas knows no peace of mind, literally).Once again Cas as a character is not fully in control and makes shitty decisions for reasons unknown? Mmmmh, me not likey.

2. Season 4: This season was explosive, I fucking loved it! First of all, as I've already said, I like when there's sort of a deadline in the plot and here we have a big one: Lilith is on her course to open the 66 seals that will free Lucifer from his cage. Problem is: nobody knows which ones she will choose since there are like 600 of them. Sam and Dean try to prevent the opening of the seals but things get complicated when the Angels enter the arena: they certainly look more like enemies rather than allies and for sure cause a lot of problems more than provide solutions. Previosly on Supernatural, Dean was rescued by Castiel from Hell (what an epic entrance, Cas!!!) after having spent 30 human years torturing and being tortured by demons, yay! Sam is now addicted to demon blood and nobody is pleased about it so our heroes have plenty on their plate. Plot-wise, this season was everything, it was a rollercoaster of turns of events, allies that become enemies, enemies become allies but wait no! they've been enemies all along! Castiel inadvertently changes the course of the story and creates real free will, Supernatural goes fully meta with the introduction of the Supernatural books by Chuck Shurley, angels are showed as scary, powerful creatures rather than comforting, merciful, ethereal beings ("Read the bible" LOL)... Man, what a fucking epic season! It felt serious but also carefree? It seems weird to say that but later on SPN gets increasingly tragic in tone so I'm very pleased with season 4 because it managed to balance everything out but with a lighter twist.

Season 11: while I was writing this, I was not sure which season would be number 1 but here I am, once again, in love with the plot of season 11. What can I say? "I'm a lover, not a fighter". So, the plot: the Winchester Bros Codependency Inc. has reached catastrophic levels: they are the ones to be thanked for the release of The Darkness into the world. The first interesting thing is that, for the first time ever, nobody really seems to know what to do. Thank God, there's the King of Hell (LOL) who promptly seizes the opportunity to take Amara and raise her hoping this would turn the events in his favours. However, he's unable to control her and soon Amara escapes wreacking havoc in the world. Not knowing what to do, Castiel decides to find Metatron, while Sam decides to go back into the Cage because he believes that Lucifer might be key to fighting Amara. Chaos ensues. Metatron doesn't really know shit, Lucifer same but he manages to escape via Castiel!vessel and we get Casifer (it was insane, I loved every minute of it!), the world is in shambles. A deus ex machina is needed: God/Chuck enters the chat. From here on, it all gets very philosophical and maybe that's why I frigging love this season. So, remember the Winchester Bros Codependency Inc.? Well, turns out Amara and God suffers from the same syndrome. They manage to (momentarily) find their balance while Dean (who had a bond with Amara because they both shared the Mark of Cain or whatever) decides to go to battle alone to convince Amara to stop or, if not possible, to die trying to save the world. And Sam Winchester is finally okay with this! Wow, progress, yes, right??? All ends so well that Amara gifts Dean with his friggin' mother who was dead 30+ years ago! Happy ending, much? LOL. I liked the simplicity of the plot, it's all very progressive, the pacing is slow but never boring, all characters still continue to make stupid choices but ultimately these don't bite them in the ass and they use them to grow... I don't know, I really enjoyed season 11. The only "negative" thing is that I wish the writers made Dean tell Cas something more meaningful than "you're our brother". Tons of metas have been written about it and yeah, I know, I know. Still, this season was all about "following the heart" so I'd have appreciated more honesty about this topic but hey, we all know how it ended so #nosurprise.

Okay, I'm done here! What do YOU think? Do you agree with my ranking? I'm curious, let me know!

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

Reducing inherently subjective comedy to a number is absolute bullshit. But the main problem with that bullshit is that shows can live or die on the subjective opinion of one reviewer who cannot account for any tastes besides their own. Sometimes a reviewer who can't even spell will just write a summary of a few things that happened during the show, inevitably missing the most important points, and then pick a random number between 1 and 5 to assign it some stars, that number bearing no relation to either the actual show or the content of their review. I may have been reading Chortle all week and getting increasingly annoyed.

And that would be basically fine, Steve Bennett is allowed to be incorrect about stuff. But the wild thing is the way his numbers started appearing on stickers on posters in the actual physical world. Which presumably only happens because some people will buy tickets based on that. That is an incredibly stupid system, who the fuck is gambling their money, and their finite time at a world-famous arts festival, on the chance that they might have the exact same taste in comedy as Steve Bennett?

Having said that, here are my totally subjective ratings out of ten (I actually made them out of 40 by including .25, .5, and .75), based on nothing but now much I enjoyed the shows. I knocked Aaron Simmonds down a bit because I'd already heard a bunch of the material in Disabled Coconut on NextUp - but I think recycling material is artistically fine so if you've not seen Disabled Coconut then this show immediately gets much better. Jordan Brookes' show would probably have a lower rating if I hadn't been in the front row for it, the best way to get an experience that relies so much on intensity. Obviously, I have some comedy styles and topics that I like more or less than other people like them. Though I'm not even usually into character comedy, so I really mean it when I say come on, Steve, Emma Sidi's hour-long character piece was a God damn masterpiece and Chortle has robbed her at 3.5 stars.

The main reason why I can internally justify calling review systems stupid and then doing my own number rankings is I'm just doing it because I like data, I'm going to go home and put this in a spreadsheet with all the other 2024 comedy hours I get to hear (NextUp, etc.) and being able to sort it that way will please me. I am also sharing it with the approximately four people who read my Tumblr blog. Obviously don't go printing it on stickers and putting it on cardboard in the real world. (Also, as I always feel the need to clarify, the way I can internally justify complaining about Steve Bennett's inability to spell when my Tumblr blog is full of errors, is no one pays me for my Tumblr blog).

Okay, here are all the shows I saw in Edinburgh, in chronological order. I enjoyed every one of them, by the way. On this scale, to call something a below-average experience - not even a shit experience, just one I didn't much enjoy - it would be 5. None of this was that. It was all much better than most other things I could be doing with my time, ie. watching shit comedy.

Oh, and I'm leaving out ACMS because you can't judge a show overall when it was that varied over 3 hours.

Jordan Brookes - 9.75

Ostensibly about: the Titanic

Actually about: masculinity

Aaron Simmonds - 6.5

Ostensibly about: Harry Potter

Actually about: making relationships work

Hebridean Fire - 6.75 (music show, not comedy)

Ostensibly about: music

Actually about: Scotland

Caledonia - 7.25 (music show, not comedy)

Ostensibly about: music

Actually about: Scotland

Emma Sidi - 9.25

Ostensibly about: Sue Grey

Actually about: the state of political competence in Britain

Kiri Pritchard-McLean - 9.5

Ostensibly about: foster parenting

Actually about: the whole social care system

Susie McCabe - 8.75

Ostensibly about: hotels and schools

Actually about: class

Lou Wall - 8.25

Ostensibly about: a terrible year

Actually about: identity and overcoming trauma

Caitriona Dowden - 7.5

Ostensibly about: the system for appointing Catholic saints

Actually about: personal impact of being raised with religion

Nish Kumar - 10

Ostensibly about: politics and anxiety

Actually about: politics and anxiety

Marjolein Robertson - 9.5

Ostensibly about: periods

Actually about: the failures of the healthcare system and society at large to take menstruation-related medical problems seriously

Jin Hao Li - 8.25

Ostensibly about: dreams and nightmares

Actually about: Johnny White Really-Really-style whimsy but with occasional shouting

Mark Silcox - 6.75

Ostensibly about: defining what men and women are

Actually about: how stupid it is to try to define what men and women are

Stevie Martin - 7.75

Ostensibly about: internet comedy vs. live comedy

Actually about: the arbitrariness of algorithmic succes

Zoe Coombs Marr - 8

Ostensibly about: everything that's ever happened in their entire life

Sheeps - 8.75

Actually about: overcoming trauma, everything that's ever happened in their entire life, spreadsheets

Ostensibly about: dads, culture wars, AI

Actually about: the complexities of maintaining personal and professional relationships as you get older

Dan Rath - 9.5

Ostensibly about: not doing well

Actually about: not doing well

Eleanor Morton - 8.25

Ostensibly about: ghosts

Actually about: the things people don't/can't see or talk about

Sarah Keyworth - 9.75

Ostensibly about: top surgery

Actually about: family

Laura Davis - 9.25

Ostensibly about: walks in non-urban areas

Actually about: I'd have gone with loneliness but they said during the show that it's not about that, so I don't know, the void at the centre of the human soul?

Tom Ballard - 9

Ostensibly about: the political state of Australia

Actually about: the political state of Australia, anti-political centrism/political agnosticism

Jonny & the Baptists - 7.75

Ostensibly about: a musical Shakespeare play

Actually about: the dismantling of arts funding and the NHS over 14 years of Tory rule

Ed Night - 9.25

Ostensibly about: not doing well

Actually about: not doing well

Natalie Palamides - 9

Ostensibly about: a 90s romcom

Actually about: toxic relationships, I guess?

Seymour Mace - 6

Ostensibly about: swearing

Actually about: depression

Mark Watson - 9

Ostensibly about: AI

Actually about: anxiety

David O’Doherty - 9.75

Ostensibly about: his parents

Actually about: how our origins shape our shared humanity

Mat Ewins - 8.25

Ostensibly about: making a game show for America

Actually about: blackmailing Richard Gadd

[waitingtobebroken]

TMI Tuesday!

Yes, @weasleywrinkles tagged me last week and I only saw it last Friday, even though I basically live on this website? So what of it?

These are ALL of my current WIPs! I have been exceptionally good and have actually managed to get them down to a reasonable level 🤭

-Ghost hunters AU, as part of The Ineffable Meet-Cute Series, in which Aziraphale and Crowley host a ghost hunting show. Crowley is skeptical, Aziraphale is smitten and they bicker like an old married couple even though they haven't even kissed! There are ghosts and there is flirting and at some point there is even some Aziraphale carrying Crowley bridal style due to some very unfortunate decisions our demon made!

-Snake AU. Okay, so, fair warning this is actual filth. Like, I have no excuse for this??? While researching snake behaviour for my Vet AU, I found some very interesting things about the way snakes act when they are trying to mate and thus... this fic was born. In it, Crowley is trying to seduce Aziraphale like a snake would but doesn't realise it. Aziraphale, who has read every book about snakes and even written some, DOES realise it and is trying desperately to get laid. A comedy of errors ensues.

-And the last one which is a very tentative thing BUT it's still standing proud in my WIP folder, is another one shot for the Flowers From The Grave Of Our Friendship (the pining while fucking fic). It's from Aziraphale's POV and is set in 3004 A.D., when our angel first realised he had feelings for Crowley. Very soft and just SLIIIIIGHTLY angsty haha!

If any of these sound interesting, send me an ask about them! 🥰🥰