#which i'm not despite many years of trying

[rosenclaws]

Hello😸 I saw that you have requests open and I’m still on that Leopold high‼️

So, could I request a little something where Leo is jealous of the attention Reader is getting and tries to get their attention back on him?

(I’d prefer if Reader was gender neutral but fem is fine too‼️)

a/n: omg jealous leo is sooo cute. That scene in the movie where he gets jealous of Kate's boss is too good. I took a lot of inspiration from that. Also there is a lot of wine talk in this and I do not know anything about wine so don't come for me for incorrect wine information okay

warnings: no pronouns used for the reader, jealous leo, asshole corporate guy

Leopold has been exposed to many unbelievable things in the past year. Time travel, television, cell phones, and the worst of all. Frozen food trays. However what Leopold isn’t used to is this feeling twisting and turning inside of his stomach. Jealously. The collar of his shirt starts to itch uncomfortably, not quite used to the wear of the 21st century. Business casual as you had called it.

He had been to many parties back in his time but they were nothing like they are now. This was no party to him. As you had explained they were more for celebrating themselves and showing off how successful the company. Still what kind of boyfriend would he be if he didn't accompany you. Ever the gentleman he is as he leads you through the crowd of people.

He had offered to get drinks as you go and mingle. With two glasses of wine in his hands he made his way back to you. Only to find you trapped in a conversation with a man he had never heard of before. He can feel his jaw clench as he slides right next to you. Handing you your drink and pressing a kiss to your forehead.

"Oh Leopold this is Mason," Leopold's eyes narrow as he notices Mason look him up and down, a smug look in his eye.

"You're the butter commercial guy." Mason says with a smirk. You feel Leopold tense slightly but he flashes his smile and reaches his hand out.

"Yes, and you are?" Leopold grips his hand a little too tight as they shake hands. You place your hand on Leopold's arm as you butt back into the conversation.

"He's new-"

"I'm the new director of marketing." He cuts you off and Leopold feels anger bubbling inside of him. Before either of you or Leopold could speak he starts talking.

Dominating the conversation with stories of how successful he's been and all the wonderful things he's done. He can't help but feel the jealously build in his gut. Your attention is on this arrogant man who is clearly trying to court you despite Leopold standing right next to you.

"You know, to be in marketing you need to have a certain, charisma about you." He glances over at you and flashes a smile. He takes a sip of his champagne and grimaces.

"Of course they got the cheap stuff, back home I have bottles of the finest wine. A bottle of champagne called La Romanée from 1873. Expensive yes but I would be happy to share. Maybe come back to my place and I'll show you." Leopold chuckles which makes Mason look to him.

"Something funny?" Leopold looks at him with a sudden confidence.

"No no. Just that from my memory that wine is from 1870 and it's pinot noir, not a champagne." Leopold raises an eyebrow as Mason starts to stammer.

"I think you've got your information wrong. My guy is a very reputable wine seller." He has a false confidence about him that Leopold can see right through. He grins, taking a sip of his own wine. He knows he isn't.

"I would contact your merchant, but perhaps I am mistaken." The damage is done as Mason starts to turn red from anger. Leopold takes a step closer. He's a polite man but he even he has his limits.

"I must add, that attempting to court someone who is already taken really is in poor taste. Simply put, you're making a fool of yourself." Mason mumbles something under his breath before stalking away in defeat. You finally let out the laugh that you had been holding in. Relieved that you were finally alone with Leo for the night.

"What a dick." You huff as pull Leopold to the side of the room.

"Didn't think you were the jealous type." You tease as Leopold starts to calm down. He sees Mason go over to what appeared to be a very important group of people. A sense of guilt washes over him. An egotistical, dick as you put it, he may be but he was still an important figure at your company.

"Forgive me if I have overstepped my place. I fear that jealously had blinded me and I acted out of line." You place your hand on top of his, gently squeezing his hand.

"You didn't, he's your typical asshole corporate higher up. It was nice seeing someone put him in his place a little." Also seeing him jealous was hot. But you'll tell him that later. You lean in and kiss him on the cheek.

"How do you know so much about wine?" He shrugs and places his now empty glass down.

"I visited Bordeaux in my youth before moving to New York." You stare at him in awe, his life before he met you was constantly surprising you.

"I want to hear more." You slowly start dragging him to the exit.

"Let's ditch this party and go home. I have a bottle of wine I got for 20 bucks that I'd be happy to share." You say, mocking the words that Mason had said to you. Leopold laughs as he places a hand on your back, guiding you away from the party.

"It's no fancy wine from France but I hope it will do." Once you're clear of the door he gently presses you against the wall. Capturing your lips in a gentle kiss.

"The best wine is any I get to share with you." He says sincerely, brushing his thumb across your lips.

He kisses you again. The sound of footsteps pass by but he could care less. A small part of him wanting to show that you are his and he is yours. He can't help it. Anyone with you in their life would feel the same way. Too bad for them, your his now.

His and no one else's.

[certifiedsexed]

Hi! Kinda embarrassed to be asking this, but I also kinda need the answer in the near future and google's being royally unhelpful.

How much should a gynecological exam hurt?

I'm ace and never had sex or really masturbated as a result, so idk how much of the pain is not used to penetration and how much is possible vaginismus. I've had a few pap smears and two vaginal ultrasounds over the years, and every time, it's felt like someone is tearing me in half. I will have a death grip on the bed trying to keep silent and not cry out in pain... which might not be normal despite every obgyn I've ever seen behaving like it is??? Like, I've even asked multiple obgyns (I rarely see the same one twice at this point, which is frustrating but beside the point) if it's out of the ordinary, and it's always been dismissed as if it'll get better, but it never has. A friend of mine recently implied this isn't normal, so now I'm wondering if I've just always been stuck with shitty gynecologists.

Hi! No worries, google is universally unhelpful, I get it.

So here's the thing: you shouldn't be experiencing that amount of pain even if you're unused to penetration. Tests like the pap smear can cause discomfort and small amounts of pain [specifically when they collect the sample], but the penetration itself isn't supposed to be causing pain, specifically not at that level.

Also, vaginal ultrasounds are supposed to be very mild.[Sometimes they hurt a little but they're mostly just supposed to be a little uncomfortable.]

There's always the possibility you have trash doctors/nurses [which is unfortunately a common issue] and they're not doing it properly. Sometimes there's pain during procedures like that if someone is especially tense too but it shouldn't be that extreme and if you're having that regularly, something is definitely wrong.

[Which is something you can check if you want, being gentle, using some lube and seeing if general penetration hurts!]

An issue here is that procedures like this are often under-researched and people frequently don't listen about things like vaginal pain. Which is shitty as fuck and inappropriate but it's common.

Vaginismus is definitely a very possible cause. Your best bet might actually be going to an OBG/YN who specifically works with people who experience vaginismus and/or general vulvodynia/dyspareunia and talking to them about what you're experiencing.

Because it sounds like you're probably not experiencing doctors constantly doing the procedures wrong [since you're going to so many different ones], but doctors that are still shitty because they don't care about the pain you're experiencing so maybe talking to a doctor who specializes in what you're experiencing would be more helpful.

(Also, like I said, maybe trying to see yourself if general penetration hurts might give you some clarity on the issue.)

I hope this helps! Lemme know, especially if you want more specific info on all of this. <3

[thisgirlnamedblusy]

Hello! I enjoy your writing. Could you write something about Donna and reader already being in a relationship and someone trying to break in at night or something and hurt reader, therefore hurt Donna? Donna tortures and kills the intruder in front of reader, kind of scaring her but reassures her she would never hurt her. Angst/fluff perhaps?

Yesss!!!! Thank you for your words!!!! Thanks for your request too, I hope it isn't too dark... Anyway, I hope you like it and sorry about the language mistakes!!!! :)))))

Safe and sound

Pairing: Donna Beneviento x Fem! Reader

Warnings: Dark themes, slightly dark Donna, Minors DNI, mentions of violence, angst but with a happy ending, Donna being Donna, fluff

Word count: 8,639

Summary: You were really scared...

N/A: Sorry about the language mistakes!!! Requests are open!!! I'm waiting yours!!! I love you all!!! :))

A walk through the woods was always reassuring. Feeling the fresh air, the snow, the sunlight, brought a smile to your face. Your steps were slow and your hand was intertwined with hers. Everything was perfect.

You were never a lucky girl. Your past was complicated, it had shadows that few people knew about but, luckily, they didn't devour you. Fearful and shy, those were the words that defined you. Apart from that, you were a normal, ordinary villager. A normal life, a normal family, the blessing of the Black Gods... There was nothing that could explain why that woman was walking hand in hand with you, why you were walking next to Donna Beneviento.

Perhaps it was the glint of normality in your eyes, the passive and conformist attitude of any ordinary villager that caught the attention of the youngest Lord. Your smile was nothing special, but for her it was something precious, something she should treasure, something she wanted to be hers.

You, of course, were also curious, attracted to that woman in black, to that covered face, to the serene darkness that always accompanied her. Little by little you achieved the goal of getting to know her, of discovering that most of the legends that spoke of Lady Beneviento were wrong, most of them.

Yes, she was a disturbed, sick woman, but she was also charming, she never gave you any reason to relate her name or her appearance with the word monster. Kissing her, confessing your feelings to her marked the beginning of the best stage of your life. You left the village behind, the shadows of your past, to enjoy the present.

The love you felt was intense, inexhaustible despite the jealous and extremely possessive nature of the lady in black. In any case, you would never abandon her. You would strive to make her sick mind understand that you were hers, only hers.

Despite those flaws, surely due to years of horrible loneliness, Donna was everything to you, just as you were to her. She was beautiful, no matter how hard she tried to deny it. Her scar was of no importance. Visible or not, you all had some kind of scar, a memory from the past that would be hard to forget.

None of that mattered to you, you simply loved her, you couldn't live without her. There was nothing more important to you than love, which can do everything, which cures everything. Little by little those jealousies became less and less frequent, although to think that they would disappear completely would be foolish.

“I love these walks,” you murmured, getting closer to the lady, leaning on her as you walked.

She leaned down to kiss you through her black veil.

“Technically it is not a walk, tesoro,” the lady whispered, laughing shyly, with that hoarse voice. Too many years of loneliness. “You are just accompanying me.”

“Yes, well…” you sighed, shaking your head. “But we’re walking at the same time, the two of us together…”

“The three of us!” Angie shrieked, Donna's irreverent doll, who walked nervously next to you. “Learn to count!”

“Yes, the three of us,” you said, rolling your eyes but not losing your smile. “Donna”

“Mm?” the lady in black murmured, looking at you through the cloth, slowing down her steps.

“Do you know what the meeting is about?” you asked curiously, sighing as the village came closer and closer, putting an end to that quiet and romantic pace.

“No,” she answered dryly, looking ahead again. “Why do you ask? I thought you weren't interested in meetings.”

“Oh, and I'm not interested in them, at all,” you joked, with a mischievous smile. “I just want to hear your voice…”

Donna laughed softly, moving out of the way, grabbing your waist and lifting her black veil so she could give you a quick kiss on the lips.

“Tesoro…” she sighed, caressing your cheek as you tried to steal a few more kisses from her. “(Y/N), the, the meeting…”

“Sorry, I can't help it,” you apologized with blushing cheeks, walking back to the village. Her response was a romantic laugh, playing with your hand as she resumed her walk.

“I don’t understand why you insist on coming with me,” she said after a few moments of comfortable silence. “You could have stayed home.”

“Yeah, well, I don’t really like being alone in that big, dark house…” you said in a joking tone. Your heart started to beat faster.

“You don’t like being at home then,” Donna said, in the same tone as always, one unable to reveal for itself the feelings of the lady in black. Interpreting what she said, what she felt was the most complicated task in your relationship. You didn’t even know if one day you would be able to do it.

“Donna…” you said rolling your eyes and moving her hand in a reprimand. “You know I don’t mean that. I just don’t like being alone.”

“You're never alone,” she said, firmly establishing a comfortable truth for her, the assurance that your love wasn’t a lie. “Even if I'm not here, I'm always thinking about you, always.”

“That's romantic… And disturbing,” you whispered with a mischievous smile.

The lady in black put a hand around your waist, pushing you to walk faster.

“Me thinking about you is disturbing?” she asked distrustfully, forcing you to roll your eyes again and lean over her shoulder. “Sei la mia ragazza…”

“You know what? Let's enjoy the walk instead of talking in languages ​​I don't understand, okay, darling?” you asked, shaking your head as you bit your lip.

Of course, Donna was a strange woman, but you loved her more and more.

“Oh Mihaela,” you said once in the village, letting Donna go and walking towards your best friend.

Well, at least you wouldn't be alone wandering through the snowy landscape. You didn't know why, but the subtle growl of the lady in black made you think that she didn't like it.

“(Y/N),” the young woman said, cautiously approaching you, lowering her head before the lady in black.

“Who is this?” Donna asked with a dangerous hiss.

“Oh, right, this is Mihaela, she's my best friend,” you said with a smile, extending your hand towards the girl, who smiled politely. “Mihaela, she's…”

“I'm sure she already knows me, (Y/N),” the lady interrupted, clasping her hands in front of her body. You didn't know if it was a polite posture or on the contrary, an intimidating one.

“Y-Yes,” your friend stammered, with her head bowed. “It's, it's a pleasure, Lady Beneviento.”

“Mm,” the woman in black murmured, pulling your arm slightly to move you away from the girl.

“What's wrong?” you asked, giving Mihaela an apologetic look. “Hey, let me go, you're hurting me.”

“I'm sorry,” Donna apologized. “I thought you came to accompany me, not to hang out with that... Girl.”

“The truth is that I found her by chance. We've been friends for many years, Donna, there's no place for your jealousy here,” you said, crossing your arms. “Come on, repeat after me: there's no place for jealousy, I like you spending time with your friends while I’m in that boring meeting,” you said jokingly.

The lady sighed deeply, shaking her head.

“Va bene…” Donna murmured, bending down to pick Angie up from the ground. “But I hope to find you here when I get back.”

“Aye, mom…” you mocked, causing the lady to turn around abruptly, growling in annoyance at your comment. “Honey…” you said in a lower tone, moving closer to kiss her over the black fabric.

“Should I stay and watch the fool?” Angie asked, while the lady ran the back of her hand over your cheek, as if she was thinking about something.

“No, it's not necessary,” she finally said, pinching your skin affectionately.

“Donna,” you said when the woman turned around, walking away from you. She turned slowly, looking at you from afar. “I love you.”

Her response was a slight nod, surely followed by an imperceptible whisper that said: me too.

Laughing in a loving way, you walked back to your friend, who kept her head down.

“Hey, can you raise your head, your neck is going to hurt,” you joked, pointing ahead so she could start walking next to you.

“I'm not used to it,” Mihaela said with an embarrassed smile. “I still can't believe you're living with a Lord.”

“Bah, it's not that big of a deal,” you said, making a gesture with your hand to make it less important.

“Don't be offended, but your girlfriend is really scary,” Mihaela commented, sitting on a nearby bench.

“I'm not offended, I'm quite used to hearing it,” you said amused. “Besides, Donna is a sweetheart, it's just that people don't know her.”

“That must be it...” your friend sighed, looking at her hands, which played with each other, nervously.

Mihaela was always your best friend, you both lived close by, you played together when you were little and you shared many joys, and also suffering, one that you barely remembered.

“Hey, are you okay?” you asked when you saw your friend's attitude, a bit stranger, as if she was extremely tired. “You don't look well.”

“Oh, yes, yes...” she said, avoiding your gaze. You knew her, she was lying. You raised your eyebrows to let her know that you didn't believe her words and finally, she sighed. “Well, the truth is that I don't sleep well lately.”

“Have you been having nightmares again?” you asked in a lower tone, rubbing her back in an understanding way.

Mihaela shook her head and looked around, as if she was scared.

“It's, it's nonsense,” the girl said, shy, with the same serious expression, one that was not very common in her. “It must be my imagination.”

“Ahem, you should take advantage of the fact that I'm here to tell me everything that worries you, like we always did, remember?” you said, starting to worry yourself, you didn't have a good feeling.

Your friend had a simple life, there was only one thing that could worry her that much.

“A few days ago I was taking a walk with Igor, you know, near our house and... And... The cabin on the hill, you know... The house of...” she explained, lowering the tone of her voice.

All the nerves in your body were on alert.

“Yes, I know what house you mean,” you interrupted, not wanting to bring back the ghosts of your past, some horrible ones. “What's wrong with that house?”

“Um, I... I don't want to scare you, (Y/N) but, but... I, I thought I saw someone inside,” Mihaela whispered, biting her lip.

“But, but that's impossible, it's-it's been years since anyone lived there,” you said with a trembling voice, just like your hands.

“I know, I know but...” your friend said, looking at the sky. “(Y/N), what if he's back?”

You shook your head effusively, unintentionally letting all the traumas of your past come back to the present. A knot in your stomach, cold sweats... Symptoms that you already knew began to punish you.

“N-No, I don't think so, he, he died,” you said nervously.

“You know as well as I do that it��s not true,” Mihaela said with a fearful whisper. “I'm scared, I think, I think he'll come for me.”

“No, no, no,” you denied, taking your friend's hand. “He, he hasn't come back and, besides, he, he didn't have anything against you, his target always was me.”

“Tell it to my sister,” the young woman murmured, with an air of sadness for that tragic memory. “I envy you, you know?”

“Me?” you asked, pointing at yourself.

Mihaela nodded with a fearful sigh.

“Yes, he probably won't dare to do anything to you because you live with Donna. You're very lucky to have someone like her who can protect you,” she explained, shaking her head.

“Yeah, well, sometimes I wish she wouldn't protect me that much…” you murmured, looking around in fear. The ominous silence of the village accentuated that old fear even more. “Hey, don't worry… I-I'm sure it's just nonsense.”

“I have a bad feeling, (Y/N)… I know it's stupid considering your situation but… Be careful,” your friend said, with a worried look.

“Eh, nothing's going to happen… He hasn't come back, I'm sure what you saw was a shadow, or an animal or… Whatever,” you said, trying to reassure yourself. “Besides, you know, you know he's coming for me, you have nothing to worry about.”

“I hope, I hope you're right and it was just my imagination,” Mihaela commented, causing silence to reign.

No, he died… Did he really?

You thought that this talk with your friend could be beneficial, but it was the opposite. Fear, an almost forgotten fear returned to your mind, to your body. As you walked back home with the lady in black, you looked at the forest as a threat and not as a romantic refuge.

“Stop squeezing me so much,” Donna protested, loosening the strong grip of your hand on her arm. You obeyed, as if you had just come out of a dream, or a nightmare. “What's wrong?”

“Nothing, I'm sorry,” you said, looking everywhere except at the lady, who growled annoyed by your strange attitude. “I'm just, I'm just glad you're with me.”

“So that's why you intend to tear my arm off?” she asked, holding you tighter, pulling you so you could keep walking. “You're very sweet, tesoro…”

“Yeah, well,” you said, laughing fakely, getting a little closer. “What was that?” you asked, digging your feet into the snow and looking at a nearby bush, one that moved suspiciously.

“Mm?” Donna muttered, looking at the same spot. “What are you talking about?”

“I, I heard something in that bush,” you stammered, cowardly taking refuge behind Donna. “Can you, can you take a look?”

“The bush? What nonsense!” Angie protested, laughing at your irrational fear.

“Go,” the lady ordered the doll, who obeyed with a grunt as the lady held your shaking hand.

Angie moved the bush, even crawled inside, coming out again and shrugging.

“Nothing,” Angie said. “What’s wrong, silly?”

“I just, I just thought… Ne, nevermind,” you muttered, running a hand over your forehead.

Donna turned around with a confused sigh, placing a lock of hair behind your ear.

“Amore mio, you're shaking, what's wrong?” she asked softly, taking your hands and squeezing them tightly.

“It's nothing, it's just that... I just didn't realize how sinister this forest is,” you said, faking a smile in a pathetic way.

“We'd better go back home then,” Donna said, with a tender laugh, caressing your cheek and leading you by the hand. You looked at that bush, at all the places where a person thirsty for revenge could hide.

That was just the beginning.

Your friend's words haunted you during the day and harassed you during the night. He couldn't have gone back, it was impossible, but you weren't able to accept it. In every dark corner, in every gap you saw the danger again.

An unpleasant return to the past, ghosts haunting you, whispering to you that you were in danger again, that the horrible man had returned.

Your character changed. You always enjoyed the outdoors, the forest, the surroundings of the mansion, but you didn't anymore. You preferred Donna's arms to the insecurity of the outside world.

She never knew, you never talked to her about it. She simply, as expected, welcomed this change in your personality as something good for her. You couldn't blame her, really, you couldn't. She didn't know and you never wanted her to.

A perfect afternoon for a walk turned into a boring afternoon of reading. Well, at least it would be boring if you weren't hugging Donna, if her soft caresses didn't pass through your hair, without her perfume soothing your fears.

Her kisses, the only moment when the lady interrupted her reading, were like a reminder to your frightened mind: she was with you and nothing would ever happen by her side.

“We finally meet again...” That terrible voice reached your ears and you panicked.

“No! It can't be! Help!” you screamed, running without moving forward, at the mercy of that monster. “No, no, no!”

“(Y/N), (Y/N)...” a soft voice interrupted you as you moved your arms, while hitting the body of the one you thought was your enemy. It wasn't.

When you opened your eyes the nightmare was over. Sweat ran down your body and your wrists were held by the lady in black, who looked at you with a frown.

“Donna...” you sighed, throwing yourself into her arms irrationally. “Donna...”

“Tesoro, calm down, it was just a nightmare,” the woman in black said, holding you tightly against her. “Shh, that's it, I'm here with you…”

“A…? A nightmare?” you repeated scared, filling the black dress with tears of terror.

“Yes, you've fallen asleep,” she said, kissing your head and grabbing you by the shoulders. “Look at me, look at me, tesoro…”

“Shit, I… I don't…” you stammered, shaking your head.

“You've been behaving strangely for a while. I'm worried about you,” she said in a serious voice, wiping the tears from your face.

“It-It's nothing, I…” you murmured, stopping shaking due to her caresses, her gestures of affection.

“You're soaked…” Donna whispered, checking the sweat that wet your clothes. “Come, I'm going to prepare a bath for you.”

“I, I… Thank you, Donna,” you said, nodding gratefully.

The hot water relaxed you, but the fear was still very present. The nightmares haunted you even when Donna held you, even when her body gave you the security you needed. Nothing worked and nothing would, maybe it was time to tell her the truth, maybe then you could forget about it.

“Bellisima…” Donna said as she lovingly combed your hair, something she loved to do, of course, covering you in kisses in the process. “You're calmer, aren't you?”

You nodded, looking at your face in the mirror. The black shadows that had settled under your eyes were the last sign to embolden you to confess what it was that scared you.

“Donna, I have, I have to talk to you,” you said with a broken voice, turning to look at her and getting up from the stool, sitting on the bed and pointing at the mattress for her to do the same.

“Mm,” she murmured with a confused look, leaving the comb on the dresser and obeying your signals. “I’m listening.”

Her voice wasn’t an understanding one, it was rather fearful. You didn't know if that was good or bad.

“There is one thing I haven't told you…” you said, playing with your hands, separated by one of hers, which she squeezed tightly.

“You're scaring me,” she said, staring at you, her breathing altered. “Have I done something wrong? Do you want to leave me?”

“What? No, of course I don’t,” you said frowning and taking your hand away from hers, annoyed by her fears. “It has nothing to do with you. It's, it's something about, about my past.”

“You fucked that slut, didn't you?” the lady asked in a haughty tone, with darkness conquering her gaze.

“No, Donna! What's wrong with you?” you said angrily.

“There's nothing you haven't told me, (Y/N), so I guess it's something I’m not going to like,” she excused herself awkwardly.

You rolled your eyes and pulled the sheets with your hand, making an effort to tell her the truth.

“Actually, there is something,” you said, looking away. “But, but let me explain it to you before you start with your paranoia, can you do that?”

She nodded indignantly, crossing her arms.

“Va bene, talk,” she indicated to you, with an unpleasant gesture of her head.

You ignored that possessiveness, that arrogance, and took a breath, expelling it slowly to relax.

“I was about 8 years old, I was, I was very little,” you began, remembering while clenching your teeth. “I always went out to play with Mihaela, with my friends, you know, kid stuff, running through the woods, playing tag…”

Donna nodded for you to continue.

“There was, there was a man… A villager who, who was always there. No matter what I was doing, he was always… Watching me. At first I thought he just lived there but… It wasn't true,” you continued, earning the full attention of the lady, who didn't take the darkness away from her gaze.

It was the first time in years that you were that nervous. You thought you would never have to tell it again, that you would never have to live it again.

“That man followed me everywhere… He watched me from afar. I didn't give it any importance until that distance began to decrease,” you said, shaking your head. “The, the years went by and… When, when I was 14, that man kept spying on me, watching me… He was getting closer and closer, I felt his eyes looking through my window at night.”

You had to take a breath again.

“I, I can't forget that sinister smile, those eyes that seemed to… Undress me…” you sighed, with tears in your eyes. “I thought he would never go that far but, one night he, he caught me while I was coming home and… He tried… He tried to…”

“(Y/N), calm down, speak clearly, please,” your girlfriend said, getting a little closer, listening to you attentively.

“He wanted to hurt me… He said that I was his since I was a child and that he could finally… take me,” you murmured, embarrassed.

“Did he get it?” Anger burned in the words of the lady in black, her breathing became agitated again.

“No, luckily my father went out to look for me and scared him off before he could get any further,” you explained, relieved to remember how your father pointed his shotgun at that monster. “But that wasn't enough for him, because that same night… He k-killed my best friend's sister. It didn't matter that there was no evidence, I knew it was him, we all knew.”

“What happened then?” the lady asked again, with a calmer tone, lifting your chin.

“My father and Mihaela's went after him. They chased him through the forest and… They say, they say he fell off a cliff and died.”

“Mm,” Donna murmured, frowning. “If he died, why are you worried?”

“Because I never thought he would really died but… Time passed and I never saw him again, so I stopped worrying until, until the other day, when Mihaela told me that she had seen someone in his old cabin,” you finally said, holding back a sob. “I'm, I'm scared, Donna, what if he's back?”

“Why didn't you tell me before?” she asked, ignoring your fears, with a somber but a not-too-dark look.

“I've already told you, because I never thought he would come back or… Or that he could. Donna, I'm, I'm so scared…” you sobbed, leaning towards her so she could hug you, so she could tenderly press your head against her chest.

She sighed but gave you that protective hug, those soothing kisses on your hair.

“You must forget about that, amore mio,” she whispered after a few minutes of crying, gently pushing you away and wiping your tears. “You have nothing to fear.”

“He swore he would come back for me… He swore it…” you stammered.

“(Y/N), stop it, stop crying,” the lady scolded you, in a harsh tone. “It's absurd.”

“Absurd? Didn't you hear me? He'll come for me,” you protested, shaking your head in disbelief.

“No one is going to come for you,” Donna said, cupping your face with her hands. “You're mine, tesoro, no one will lay a hand on you, do you hear me? I protect you, I will never let anything happen to you, besides, surely that friend of yours is stupid and she just imagined it.”

“Do you mind stopping insulting my friends?” you asked with irony, moving away from her and crossing your arms. “Mihaela would never say something like that to me if she wasn't sure. Donna, he killed her sister.”

“That man is dead, (Y/N),” she sighed, struggling with you so she could caress you again. “You have to forget about that. You can't live scared like that.”

“I can't believe you don't understand…” you said with an offended look, open-mouthed. “You don't know what it's like to feel these things, to feel someone stalking you.”

“I can't believe you trust me so little that you can’t stop being scared by silly things,” the woman in black responded, with a haughty gesture. “You're with me and nothing and no one will ever hurt you, do you hear me? So, forget about it and try to relax.”

“It's very easy to say,” you murmured, calmed by her caresses.

“You don't trust me” she said with a soft, tender tone, tilting her head slightly. “You don't think I can protect you?”

“Yes, yes, but…” you said with a sincere smile, caressing her cheek too, relaxing her incipient madness. “You know what? Y-you're right Donna, I have nothing to worry about.”

“Mm, come here,” she said, smiling in the same way and kissing you slowly, moistening her lips with yours, relaxing your spirit a bit.

Donna was right, with her by your side nothing would happen to you.

Of course that should have been reason enough for you to stop thinking about it, but it wasn't. Yes, your fear calmed down, but it was still present. You were still reluctant to leave the house if it wasn't with Donna by your side, every corner was a danger, every moment of solitude was a risk. The nightmares had diminished, but the worry was still impregnated in your mind, that was something you couldn't avoid.

The days passed quickly, the nights were slow, as if time itself was mocking and scaring you.

“Did you like dinner, tesoro?” Donna asked, completely calm, smiling like every time you tasted one of her dishes. “(Y/N),” she said in a more impatient voice, seeing that you were distracted, looking at the darkness through the window.

“Oh, sorry, yes, Donna, it was delicious,” you said, pretending you weren't watching your surroundings.

She smiled pleased, looking at you with a tenderness that always won you over, with that bright, loving eye you were addicted to.

“You're beautiful when you smile…” the lady murmured, with a seductive look, making your cheeks blush little by little.

“That's because I'm with you,” you said amused, looking at her in the same way, feeling how the warmth of your chest hid your fear.

“Mm, maybe you want to tell me those things while we watch a movie,” she whispered sensually, biting her lip. “Or while doing other things…”

“Tempting,” you joked, nodding slowly. “I like the plan.”

“I like you,” she said with her voice filled with desire, with the love she felt and never get tired of showing you. “I'm going to pick this up and... Well, we'll see what we do, okay, tesoro?”

“No, no, Donna,” you said kindly, getting up from the table and grabbing her wrist. “You've been cooking for a long time. Let me pick it up...”

“As you wish,” she said, taking advantage of the proximity to kiss you quickly on the lips, a kiss that said many things, that said how much Donna wanted to continue devouring your lips. “I'll wait for you in the basement.”

“Yes, go to prepare the bed, I mean, the movie,” you joked, shaking your head and pretending to be absent-minded.

Donna laughed amused, looking at you seductively before walking away from you.

You sighed in love, slowly picking up the plates and glasses. The creaking of the wood alerted you unexpectedly. You felt like someone was watching you. The plates moved in your hand, trembling dangerously and you looked at the source of the sound, a shadow hiding under the table.

“Boo!”

“Ahhh!” you screamed in fright, dropping the dishes with a horrible sound, breaking the plates and glasses into pieces.

The Angie doll came out from under the furniture, laughing out loud.

“Fool, what a scare!” she shrieked amused. “I scared you, I scared you,” she mocked while you, in shock, shook your head.

“A-Angie, damn it,” you said trembling, on the verge of a heart attack.

“(Y/N), are you okay?” Donna asked, running to your side while you bent down to pick up the plates, suffering the doll's mockery. “Che cos’è sucesso?”

“Nothing… Nothing… Angie scared me,” you said in a low voice, embarrassed by that exaggeration. Your heart was beating fast, the fear never went away.

“Angie!” Donna shouted furiously, making the doll run away from the place. “Let me help you.”

“Th-Thanks…” you murmured, looking down.

“You shouldn't be that scared, Angie always does the same,” the lady said, helping you with the plates. “(Y/N)”

“Mm?” you murmured, trying to pretend that you had regained your composure.

The lady in black slowly stood up with a cold look, crossing her arms.

“You're still scared of that man,” she said in a dark tone, looking at you almost with contempt.

“What? N-no, that doll scared me, that's all,” you lied clumsily, unintentionally agreeing with her.

“You know you can't, and shouldn't lie to me, (Y/N),” she hissed, without taking her accusing eye off yours.

“Fine... Yes, I'm still a bit scared,” you finally confessed, looking back at the window, where the trees mocked you by forming sinister shapes.

“I thought I told you to forget about that nonsense,” the lady scolded you, placing her finger on your chest. “Can't you hear what I'm saying?”

“You don't understand that I'm scared? Fuck, Donna, how can you be like that?” you protested, letting out the stress you had accumulated.

“If you're unable to be calm around me, it's because you don't trust me,” she said arrogantly.

“You always twist everything!” you screamed, clenching your fists on either side of your hips. “I haven’t any problem with you! I love you, Donna, I love you...” you sighed, trying to relax. “I'm just scared, fuck, I'm scared, isn't that logical? Are you so insane that you can't even understand me?”

The lady sighed, raising her gaze and turning around to leave.

“W-Wait, Donna, I didn't mean that,” you said hastily, grabbing her wrist, a grip she pulled away abruptly, too abruptly.

“If you don't feel safe with me... Just leave!” she shouted furiously, making you flinch.

“Donna, wait, wait,” you said nervously, trying to stop her. “It's not that, it's just that…”

“You're stupid!” Donna shrieked, approaching and making you back away. “You’re acting like a scared little girl when you should know that nothing will happen to you because you're with me, why is it so hard for you to understand?”

“You're the one who doesn't understand… Donna, calm down…”

“Stupida…” the lady hissed, with a look that hurt you, turning around and disappearing down the elevator hallway. “Porca puttana!”

“Damn it… Arghhhh!” you growled, kicking the wooden floor, unable to make Donna understand your fears, which were insignificant to her.

Getting some air was the best thing.

Trying to calm your breathing, you walked towards the exit, feeling the cool breeze relax your nerves. It was difficult to understand her anger, her rage, it always was. You knew she really wanted to help you in her own way, release you from those fears that were probably absurd.

Poor Donna had been alone for so long, she didn't know how to deal with such things. Your mind excused her for her attitude, as did your heart. You couldn't blame her for feeling desperate, for feeling that your trust in her didn't go far enough.

The fear was much greater. It surpassed the limits of your logic. Yes, that man would never approach the house of a Lord. It was a rational thought, one that Donna tried to make you understand in every possible way.

But you didn’t give in. You were not able to calm down. Maybe the fact of seeing herself unable to help you as she would like frustrated her. It wasn’t the first time that it happened, that Donna's problems came from her inability to cure yours.

Her anger wasn’t towards you and you knew it, it was towards herself, for not being able to help you when you needed it.

While you turned over everything that had happened, you contemplated the waterfall illuminated by the full moon, calming yourself. The landscape was calm, peaceful. Yes, she was right. You had to start to stop thinking about your past. You had to trust her.

To start with, you had to apologize, since surely, she wanted to do the same.

“Okay…” you whispered, moving away from the railing, freezing when you heard the creak of the door, the door you couldn't see due to your position. “Donna?”

There was no answer. A shiver ran down your spine as you approached the door. There was no one there.

“It, it must have been the wind,” you said, looking at the door, now half open.

Slowly, you closed it, sighing, walking slowly through the entrance, looking for the best way to fix things with the lady in black.

“Finally,” that dark voice scared you.

You felt someone grab you from behind, holding your neck with one arm. An evil laugh ran through your ears and your irrational fears disappeared. Someone had entered the house, someone you knew.

“Help!” you screamed, immediately silenced by a disgusting hand on your mouth. The grip was too strong to break free from.

He was back, that man was back, it wasn't paranoia, he had entered the mansion and he had caught you.

“Well, well...” he whispered. “How much time has passed?”

“Mmmm,” you protested, fighting against his grip, panic increasing your adrenaline.

“Don't bother talking... I never liked talkers, (Y/N)...” the man whispered sinisterly, warming your ear with his breath.

Using a bit of strength, you managed to remove his hand from your mouth, taking a breath.

“Donna! Donna!” you screamed, running away from the attacker, something he stopped by grabbing your ankle and dragging you towards him.

“Shhh don't scream, no one is going to come to help you, darling…” he said in a disgusting voice while you kept moving, desperate. “I think you stopped being that innocent little girl a long time ago.”

“Let me go!” you screamed desperately, kicking the intruder, looking for help with your eyes. “Donna!”

A strong blow to the head made you shut up. Your forehead was wet against the wooden floor, you were bleeding, dizzy, scared…

“Shut the fuck up,” he said, pulling your hair, satisfied by your inability to move. “Look at you… The little whore of Beneviento… You didn't know you had such high aspirations…” he mocked, laughing sinisterly. “I'm sorry, (Y/N), but I'm afraid that nutcase won't be able to protect you… Not when I've been… Looking for you for so long!”

“Donna…” you whispered in a small voice, trying to stop that animal from climbing on top of your body while licking his lips. “Please…”

“Calm down, you'll be back between that bitch's legs soon… But first… I think we have something pending…”

“No!” you screamed when those disgusting hands wandered over your clothes, moving them with a strength you didn't know you had, managing to punch him hard in the face and make him retreat.

“Damn bitch…” he hissed angrily as you crawled on the floor, looking for help. “I've got you!” he said triumphantly when he grabbed you by the hair, pulling it to bend you up. “This time you won't escape.”

You could only cry desperately, until you heard the hurried sound of heels.

“She was screaming, I swear Donna!” Angie's shrill voice was the next thing you heard, along with the sight of the doll pointing at you nervously. “Donna, Donna!”

“Don't move,” the man whispered in your ear, tightening his grip on your hair as you cried, while your blurry eyes watched the lady approach.

“D-Donna…” you said with a distorted voice.

The lady's eye widened, her chest rising and falling rapidly, but there was no shock or panic in her gaze, only serenity.

“Don't take another step,” the attacker threatened, taking out a knife and putting it to your throat. “Or I'll slit her throat from end to end.  (Y/N), you disappoint me…” he hissed in your ear, with a sinister smile, surely due to Donna's immobility. “Do you really prefer that disgusting nutcase over me?”

“Shut up!” Angie shrieked. “Donna, do something, quickly…”

“Donna…” you sobbed, looking at the lady, who remained serious, unmoved by the aggressor's painful words.

The lady took a slow step, then another. The grip on your hair tightened even more.

“I said don't come closer,” the man threatened, stabbing the knife into your skin harder. “Back off, you monster!”

Donna stopped, sighing and glancing at you out of the corner of her eye.

“Help me, please…” you begged, stretching your arm out as far as you could trying to reach the doll maker.

“No one touches what's mine,” Donna whispered, darkening her gaze and raising her arm towards the man.

Suddenly the grip on your hair was released, causing you to fall to the floor with a thud and allowing you to crawl towards the lady, who helped you up, hugging you tightly against her.

“Donna…” you cried desperately against her dress, pulling at her clothes desperately, terribly scared. Your body trembled hopelessly.

You moved your head to look at your attacker, who had a lost look, looking up as if he were hypnotized.

“Angie,” the lady said in a dark tone, pushing you towards the doll, who approached you.

“(Y/N), silly, are you okay?” the puppet asked, helping you sit on the floor as you cried inconsolably.

Among tears, you looked at the lady and the attacker. The woman in black went a little closer, with that cold, expressionless look, moving her hand.

The man growled, grabbing his head as if it were about to explode. Slowly, trembling, he began to move involuntarily, picking up the knife he had dropped.

“No… No…” he whispered, moving his arm, pointing the blade towards his chest and slowly sinking it into his flesh. “Ahhhhh!”

You watched the scene in horror. Blood was pouring from his self-inflicted wound as he pulled out the knife, stabbing it somewhere else nearby, into his chest again.

“Ahhhh!” The man's screams of pain echoed in your ears. You looked at Donna, who seemed to smile at his suffering. A dangerous smile like you had never seen before. “No, no, have mercy!”

“Did you have mercy when you killed that girl?” Donna whispered, tilting her head mockingly. “Mm, I guess you didn’t.”

“Ahhhhh!” the man screamed again, stabbing the knife all over his body under the steady gaze of your girlfriend, who reveled in his suffering, bending down and grabbing his hair tightly.

“Mm, you don't deserve me wasting my time with you,” she murmured disinterestedly, letting him go in disgust and moving her hand again.

“No...No...” the man pleaded, with his knife resting on his throat.

You looked away when he began to cut it among screams of pain. Then, there was only silence.

You looked over your knees to contemplate that horrible scene, to see how Donna touched the lifeless body of that vermin with her foot. Her face was expressionless, cold.

She had killed him, but not only that, she had been cruel. She had enjoyed doing it. The fear you had for the attack was transformed, heading towards the lady in black.

“Angie,” Donna said, walking towards you. “Call Karl, he has to take care of taking out the trash,” she ordered, to which the doll nodded, quickly going to fulfill her request.

The lady sighed, looking for the last time at that lifeless body bleeding out on a carpet.

“Tesoro...” she said, changing apathy to concern, crouching next to you. “Amore mio... Has he hurt you?”

“N-No,” you murmured, uncomfortable by her caresses, by her hand in yours, the hand that guided the thoughts of that man, that guided him to his death.

“Oh, you are hurt,” she sighed with a sad look, touching the wound on your head, which you had forgotten. “Come, let's go to the basement.”

Helped by Donna, you went down the elevator. The shock was slowly wearing off, but in your head you only had one thing: her smile, Donna's smile as she made that man suffer.

You knew she was dangerous, that she was sick, but you had never had the misfortune of confirming those rumors.

In your head there was no relief or gratitude, only fear, a new fear, the fear of the lady in black.

You knew she loved you, you were sure of it. You were hers. She always made a point of reminding you of it but... What would happen if she got tired of you? What would happen to you if she stopped loving you? Would she make you suffer like that too?

All those questions clouded your thoughts as she sat you down on a chair, searching for the first aid kit in one of the closets.

“Look at me, tesoro…” she told you in a soft voice, as if she hadn't just killed a man.

You involuntarily moved away from her touch, one that you irrationally saw as threatening. The lady growled, grabbing your chin tighter so you would look at her.

“It's all over, (Y/N), that bastardo won't bother you again, relax,” she said to you, changing the strong grip for a caress on your cheek and a tender smile.

You nodded, hissing in pain when a cotton ball brushed your wound.

“You deserve an apology, (Y/N),” the lady commented, sitting in front of you to better heal your wound. “I never thought that man would be so stupid as to break into the house.”

You nodded again, it was the only thing you could do without trembling.

“Mm, okay… It's nothing serious…” she sighed, soaking more cotton in the alcohol. “Amore mio… This wound hurts me more than it hurts you… I should never have let this happen.”

“It's not your fault,” you whispered in a weak voice, looking away.

“Shh, look at me,” she corrected, moving your face again. “I hope you'll be able to forgive me for my carelessness.”

“I have nothing to forgive you for,” you murmured, wiping away a tear that was running down your cheek.

The lady sighed, putting down the bottle and the cotton and grabbing your hand, leaning in to kiss you, something you rejected.

“It's okay, I understand, you're angry with me,” she whispered in a strangely understanding way. “Are you hurt anywhere else?”

You shook your head, moving away from her.

“Okay…” she murmured, getting up from the chair with a sad look. “(Y/N) if I lost you… It would be, it would be hell for me, do you understand?”

You nodded reluctantly.

“You don't want to talk to me,” she sighed, shaking her head and running a hand through her hair. “Okay, do you want to be alone, tesoro?”

“You enjoyed it,” you murmured in a low voice, gaining enough courage to tell her what was really going through your head.

“Cosa?” she asked, looking at you confused. “What are you talking about?”

“You killed that man, and you enjoyed it, I saw the way you smiled,” you hissed in a dark voice.

“What did you want me to do, (Y/N)? He was going to hurt you,” Donna said, looking at you with a frown.

You shook your head, looking at the floor.

“You could have scared him, you could have made him run away forever,” you said thoughtfully, with your hands starting to shake. “But, but you have tortured him… You have made him suffer.”

“Anyone who dares to touch what is mine suffers the consequences,” she said, with that cold look again, still proud of her actions.

At that moment you exploded.

“So what will happen to me if I stop being yours? Are you going to torture me too?” you asked angrily, getting up from the chair. “You scare me, Donna, I have never been so afraid of you.”

“(Y/N), how can you think that way? Tesoro, you're really upset, let me…” she said, coming closer, something you stopped by cowardly running away from her touch.

“Don't touch me! Get away from me!” you screamed nervously, pathetically protecting yourself with your hands.

“I would never hurt you, I'd rather die,” the lady said, with a sad, pleading tone, one that you ignored.

“I don't know if I can believe you, not with what I've seen,” you said, relaxing the tone of your voice.

“(Y/N)… What's wrong with you? Was I supposed to let that man abuse you? Let him get away with it and let him get on with his life?” Donna said, coming closer in a threatening way. “I was just protecting you!” she yelled nervously, grabbing the collar of your dress, making you close your eyes tightly, expecting the worst.

“Donna…” you gasped in fear.

She blinked, watching as her hand grabbed your clothes, seeing your scared eyes and getting scared, of herself.

“Gods, (Y/N), I'm sorry…” she said, letting you go softly. “Tesoro, please, understand me, I love you so much that… I would do anything to protect you.”

“Leave me alone,” you hissed, pushing the lady away roughly. “Please, I want to be alone.”

“No, wait, wait, please,” Donna said, grabbing your wrist. “Please amore mio… For-forgive me…”

“You can't apologize for something you aren’t really sorry about. You don't regret what you've done, you're a psychopath,” you growled, tears streaming down your face again.

“Don't say that, please…” she sobbed, shaking her head at the harshness of your words. “Please… Stop, stop insulting me…”

“I love you Donna, but you made me think, so it's best that I go to my parents' house for a while,” you said grimly, with all the coldness you were capable of.

“No…” she sighed, opening her eye wide. Her breathing was completely uncontrolled. “No! Don't leave me!” she screamed desperately, throwing herself to the floor to grab your legs, losing her dignity.

“Let me go, Donna… I have, I have to think about many things… I need some time,” you said, struggling with the tearful mess that clung to your body. “Let me go!” you shrieked, pushing the tearful lady away from you, causing her to fall to the floor.

“No, don't leave!” she screamed furiously, her face torn by tears. “Don't leave me!”

“I'm sorry,” you said crying too, turning around only to hear her outburst of fury, how she hit everything with her fists while she cried in agony. “I'll come back when I have a clear mind.”

“No!” she screamed, hitting the floor with her fists, writhing in her madness. “YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME!”

Her fury was hard to ignore as you walked towards the door.

“You can't leave me because I saved your life!” she finally sobbed.

Those words did something in your mind.

Saved your life…

You were so blinded by fear, so scared that you had forgotten the most important thing. Without leaving the room, you moved your hand to the wound on your head, unable to take another step.

That wound was not only a reminder of Donna's rage, of her sadism and torture. No, that wound had another meaning that you were beginning to sense.

Yes, she tortured that man. She made him suffer but… What would have happened if she hadn’t intervened? The answer was in the marks on your body, in the sad look of your best friend, in your terrible memories.

If Donna hadn’t been there to protect you, your end would have been long and horrible. Surely that disgusting man would have had fun with you until you were completely useless, and what for? Why leave the witness of your atrocities alive? No, you would have been of no use to him anymore.

 You would have died, like Mihaela’s sister.

That terrible truth ravaged your thoughts with horrible images of your body used and abandoned anywhere. That man was not a man. He was a beast, one which would never rest until it got what it wanted.

What would have happened if Donna had been merciful, if she had spared that wretch’s life? You could read the answer before your eyes, he would return.

Maybe not the next day, or the next month, but he would come back. Those kinds of disturbed people always did. And… If that were the case, what would happen to you? Your terrible end.

You couldn't stop thinking about when you were a child, when that beast was stalking you, about Mihaela's tears when she lost her sister. It was all so unfair, so terrible… Did that man really not deserve that torture?

For all the girls who suffered, for all the harm he did, for everything he was, he deserved it. He deserved every stab, even some more.

Then you realized your mistake of misinterpreting Donna's actions as those of a psychopath. Imagining that sinister smile of the lady again, you could see your friend, her sister smiling next to Donna, enjoying revenge, thanking the lady for make that monster pay for his crimes.

Donna had protected you, she had saved your life, she had saved what was hers. She had saved more girls from suffering in the future. She wasn't a bad person. She had her flaws, her illness, but still, she saved you and how did you thank her? By abandoning her, making her believe that saving you was a mistake.

You turned around slowly, looking at the lady curled up unable to stop crying, pulling at her hair.

You bit your lip and approached slowly, crouching down next to her.

“Donna, darling,” you said softly, freeing her from her own grip. She looked at you with her eye red from crying, unable to do anything else but sob. “Donna, stop, stop please, I'm still here…”

“(Y/N)…” she sobbed, blinking rapidly. “(Y/N)…”

“Shhh, it's over, my love… I'm not going anywhere. My place is here, with you…” you whispered in a calm voice. “I'm sorry, I'm so sorry I behaved like that, I… Donna, I haven't even thanked you for saving my life… I'm, I'm stupid…”

“Don't leave…” she whispered, letting you wipe her tears, staring at you. “Please…”

The lady in black, broken, bowed her head to your chest, head that you hugged without thinking, kneeling on the floor and comforting her crying.

“I won't leave, darling, I won't leave…” you repeated, holding back your tears. “I just got, I got scared… I was, I was scared.”

“How can you be afraid of me?” she asked, with her head buried in your dress. “I would never hurt you, never… E-Even if you leave me I… I would be incapable of hurting you… You are my precious girl, my sunshine, my everything… I love you more than anything… You have to believe me… I would never hurt you… Never!”

“I know, I know, Donna,” you said nodding, moving her away from your body so you could look at her properly, to relax her with a soft caress that preceded a tender, salty kiss, a kiss that ended her fears, and yours. “I love you, I love you… And… I, I like that you protect me, I want you to always protect me… Donna, my love… You are the love of my life…”

[ghostradiodylan]

Probably a lukewarm take, but other than the (lack of an) ending, the Laura and Ryan scenes are some of the worst written and conceived parts of The Quarry.

And this is completely separate from whether Ryan is interested in Dylan (he is, but that's another post and not important to this rant) or Kaitlyn; even if Ryan had no other potential relationships in the game, even if Laura wasn't practically married to Max, wearing his ring around her neck the entire time they're talking, it still would feel flat to me because nothing about it is earned.

Laura is on a killing spree with the single-minded goal of saving Max. She genuinely believes the only way to do that is to kill Chris Hackett. Even if you've made her argue with Max to the extent that they can, they're still a strong unit when she goes out to solve this werewolf thing once and for all. Even if you don't believe in love think their relationship would survive all this trauma, she deeply believes she owes it to him to rescue him, that is her entire guiding ethos during the game.

Ryan is going with her to try to keep that from happening because Chris has been his friend and mentor for years. We know Ryan has an absent mother, unmentioned father, and a potentially turbulent family life, and he's been coming to HQSC for so long that it feels like home to him, that Chris and his kids feel like family. Laura has already killed Kaylee. Even if Ryan completely bought into the werewolf thing by now, that would be a tough pill for him to swallow, given his reaction to her death.

Then, they fall in the titular Quarry and suddenly have the option to express a completely unearned sort of camaraderie with each other. Why is Laura asking Ryan about his love life in the first place? The question about him being single makes sense as a dig, but it doesn't make any sense for her to ask about him being a 'brooding and mysterious loner' because... she hasn't actually seen him do anything brooding or mysterious? How did she even get that impression? If Laura's got some kind of borderline psychic intuition then this is really the worst possible use of that ability--she should have foreseen her need to go to that motel and stay the fuck out of locked storm shelters instead.

It doesn't make a lick of sense for her to say that Kaitlyn looks up to him either. She hasn't seen that. Hell, we as players haven't even seen that! Kaitlyn seems generally tolerant of but unimpressed by Ryan. She has the option to be impatient with him multiple times and even get the chyron that she's ‘losing respect’ for him if he suggests she take the gun and go after Nick instead. This seems like an objectively good idea, since she's a much better shot than Ryan, a fact which the game keeps telling us despite refusing to give her a gun until the last possible second, though maybe the concern is that she'd have to drag Nick back to the campfire herself. (Honestly, I think Kaitlyn could do it, I think she's like a mighty ant who can lift many times her own weight, but that's not what this post is about.)

Ryan, for his part, shouldn't really be willing to talk about any of this with Laura either. He canonically doesn't even want to talk to his coworkers about his animation school decision (in the office scene with Dylan and at the campfire with Emma if you choose truth like a lunatic) and he's known them for at least two months, if not for years attending the same camp. But he met Laura a few hours ago and is suddenly willing to spill his guts about who he does or doesn't have a crush on and who does/doesn't have 'the hots' for him, despite the only experience they have together being her leaving his friend of several years dead facedown in a pool and expressing a strong desire to kill his father figure? I simply do not buy it.

I'm not sure if this was supposed to go along with the relationship system that they scrapped or what (there's not a single shred of Ryan and Laura stuff in the datamine that I've been able to find), but all it really serves to do is muddy the waters by trying to force some level of intimacy on Ryan and Laura before the big confrontation at the Hackett House. But that confrontation itself should have been the thing that forged that intimacy between them and allowed them to go on to fight Silas together.

Overall, I think it's a major sign that the back third of the game got a very rushed and, frankly, bad chop job (which we know is true) and that they struggled to tie the resulting loose threads off in a way that made any kind of narrative sense. It's a shame, because the writing in The Quarry is actually way better than most people give it credit for, it just wasn't allowed to pay off in a lot of ways that clearly were intended.

[fireolin]

I am trying so hard to improve my fitness, an ongoing journey for me almost since I started this blog. My current goal is to be able to easily walk say 12km over a day to be ready for my trip to Japan.

Reasons this is a challenge are all related to me being hyper mobile, though not in a particularly extreme way. But over time this has meant a range of injuries including way too many sprained ankles, culminating in a complete tear through my right atfl last year.

Coming back from that has been slow but positive, as I see a physio for the inevitable weird injuries I knew I'd get along the way. My feet are toughening up nicely, able to handle time and effort, with just a bit of icing to deal with issues.

Naturally I got overeager and did 2 x 8km walks last weekend, one each day. Which were fine on my feet, but now I have a spasmed muscle in my left calf. And today, I decided it had recovered enough to walk to my local train station despite the hills (and I made it!) but then i buggered it up in a shoe shop, experimentally jogging on my toes. Instantly crippled the calf, alarming everyone in the shop around me. Limped slowly to a cafe to recover enough to then limp sloooowly to the train, and then luckily to a bus back home - the driver was very kind as I slooooowly manoeuvred myself on and off.

Now I'm sitting on a heat pack hoping the spasm settles down. Because I'd hoped to do more long walks on the weekend. But it's not looking good right now :(

[66sharkteeth]

hello! i just noticed you have a tumblr so i wanted to send in a little appreciation note!

i've been following city of blank for years and consistently it's been one of my favorite webtoons. you have a great eye for character design, especially with the uniqueness of the masks fitting each character so perfectly. your rendering is so incredible, especially in high tension fights! i'm consistently impressed how you build up to pivotal moments and you do it fantastically every time.

i am always impressed with your writing as well! the characters feel very realistic and raw. you do the conflict well but also the goofy lighthearted moments, which honestly i find to be the admirable trait of a writer!

tl;dr i love your webtoon! keep up the great work and try not to be too discouraged if comments decrease or if webtoon screws you over. you're doing amazing!

thank you! :') It's hard to not be discouraged sometimes but I try to remind myself of all the factors...like that I'm seriously lucky I still have this many readers almost 200 chapters in despite the lack of marketing WT gives it. It really goes to show how much you guys care about CoB! Thank you for the kind words

[ruffboijuliaburnsides]

Things that, according to the person who just added me to their 'zionist blocklist' count as worth blocking someone over, based on the screenshots they took of my blog:

a) pointing out that wanting dead jews is antisemitic b) pointing out that "palestine" historically did not exist as a country but that you can and should still advocate for the human rights of palestinian people c) In the wake of the 10/7 attack, that you shouldn't immediately disavow an Israeli-owned, Tel Aviv-based company for tweeting originally in support of IDF, especially when not only has that tweet been taken down but their posts have mostly been fundraising for relief for ALL victims of that attack, not just Jewish victims d) saying that you can want to support the victims of hamas attacks without agreeing with the actions of the Israeli government

...yeah despite not being Jewish (yet) myself, I think i know what conclusion they jumped to when deciding to make that post. 🙄

[kyojuuros]

knowing communication is vital to a healthy relationship but never knowing how to start a conversation or holding back because you don't want to burden them with your emotions or say/do something that will push them away and just generally being socially inadept is such a fun time! :)

[wayfinderships]

I'll be so doomed the day I ever get a girl f/o

[complicit-rot]

i haven't been this social & talkative in Years someone drag me out back

[c0rpsedemon]

.

[dizzblaine]

All I can really say about the studio's closure at this point is that it's a very sad situation which reinforces my beliefs regarding how ridiculous these companies are in the mishandling of developers and the IP's they own. Absolute shitshow.

I know the series is technically "still alive". But I really have no confidence in where it will go at this point in time. Even if there are people still trying to fight for it that have remained employed. I don't know, man.

[lightningfilledsaber]

sometimes I feel... silly. for saying I have the disorders/illnesses/etc that I have because I’m not diagnosed and the little internalized ableism monster in my head telling me it’s “too many” but also like. I’ve taken a VERY long time sitting down and evaluating these things about myself and I still don’t like. allow myself to use certain diagnostic labels despite fitting most, if not all, of the criteria. It feels like a fine line to walk, understanding that self-diagnosis is in a lot of cases critical, just as a professional diagnosis can be! I have my reasons for using the labels I do and identifying with what I do, just as I have my reasons for not seeking diagnosis, and I think at the end of the day whether I choose to use them or not, I know I’m doing all I can to use them with respect.  

[eyivibyemi]

✧ I won’t really write descriptions for these, but see original post tags for explanation/commentary on the song snippet ✧

[megroha]

.

[stringsbasement]

ngl i 100% thought peri would be an antagonist

he's the first fairy in thousands of years, born directly under the lineage of what has to be the most powerful fairy family line in current existence

(cosmo is a von strangle, and also the very reason fairies stopped having babies in the first place. he's incredibly powerful and nobody talks about it for some reason. it's clear peri inherited that destructive potential)

the second he was born, entire fairy species (including his own kin) were out to get him to use his volatile magic for their own selfish goals. he's nearly kidnapped thrice, and almost ends the universe on the same day

the threats keep coming, and he's being dragged to countless adventures that put him at risk. he literally ceases to exist more than once

anyway, i wouldn't be surprised if some form of expectations were placed upon him growing up. maybe not by his family, but he's famous (a teacher described him as such once); in fairy world, he's automatically adored and celebrated by adults and peers alike, which foop antagonizes (and tries to kill) him for

cosmo and wanda would, realistically, of course try to shield him from all this, but no matter what they do, he's inevitably isolated

people either want to use him, put him on a pedestal, or is a universally infamous human godchild who will forget all about him in a matter of years

(cosmo and wanda becoming godparents and learning (choosing) to eventually let go of their kids is one thing, but it can be assumed poof was still a young, underdeveloped child by the time timmy (+chloe, for what it's worth) got his memories wiped

and he sees that timmy's able to live his own happy life without him in it. he lost his brother just like that, and there's nothing he can do despite all his godly powers)

there's so, so many ways he could've gone wrong

thus, my initial thought was that peri was going to be a somewhat petty, "spoiled brat," and him becoming a godparent would be the result of spite or rebellion, which cosmo and wanda would feel entirely responsible for. I HATE MY PARENTS!! yada yada yada

it was a pleasant surprise to see all those clips of them loving each other. and it's not even because i doubted for a second that cosmo and wanda are bad parents, it's just what you usually expect when seeing shows from the 2000s, even if it doesn't make sense

all things considered, i'm very glad they went for the lighthearted silly family trope. not every show needs such conflicts, and showing healthy dynamics are better for kids overall

still, i find it interesting to think about if they'd gone down another route instead. i love me a pathetic cringy villain who tries (fails) to hate the people they love the most