#which i was supposed to do but my bitch ass forgot

[seraphicsentences]

HEY! i knwo your on a break but just incase your bored could you write reader sending spicy texts2 streamer!ellie while shes on like a boss level, and then after ‘raging’ at reader for making her lose, she comes back as if the chat isnt questioning the sounds coming from the other room (silly girl forgot to mute)

hi. tumblr j deleted all my edits to this. i’m rage quitting and j posting this version i banged out in the span of 15 minutes 😀 anyways.

FUCK i’m sorry i know this took fucking forever and now i’m delivering mediocrity. loved this req either way this was smf to write. hope you enjoy sweet girl ;)

me when i disappear for a month and come back only to deliver pure dog shit. 🤪🤪

“-KID JUST GOT FUCKING DESTROYED, FUCKING BITCH.”

it was a late friday night, which meant ellie was streaming in her room, and you were supposed to be studying.

this week ellie was hosting a special in celebration of hitting 10k subscribers, and was grinding away to finally defeat Resident Evil’s final boss.

you could hear the chat dinging away with message after message, no doubt blasting ellie with compliments on her play, and the occasional comment thirsting over her hands or whatnot. it was nothing new— you’d seen the countless edits of her on your own social media page, and even had a folder of your own favorites saved away on a burner account.

“let me suck your fing- WHAT?! that is a crazy thing to say,” you could hear ellie’s shocked voice. “either way, chat, i’m married…”

“where’s my ring? UP YOUR ASS. c’mon, leave me be, guys,” ellie jokingly whined, bantering with her obsessive fanbase.

you held back a smile of your own, hand pressed to your mouth as she continued to scold the chat for their outrageously filthy messages. what a dork.

“alright alright, im muting the chat. love you guys but i gotta focus now! this is serious shit and i’m low on ammo now, hah-ha,” ellie spoke to the screen, words slightly muffled through the thin wall.

in the living room papers lay strewn across the floor, couch littered with eraser shavings and crumpled post-it notes, yourself splayed atop it all.

studying was a long-forgotten task you abandoned to instead sweep lazily through your camera roll, attempting to clear up some much needed storage.

you stopped abruptly at the thumbnail of an old video, in which depicted a downright sinful image of ellie’s bared neck for you as she arched back in pleasure.

you quite literally salivated at the veins that adorned her sweat-glistened skin, naked chest that was just covered by the play button in the center, goading you to click it.

quiet sounds of ellie’s desperate moans picked up, her head coming up look just above the camera and deliver the most pathetically fucked-out look.

“ple-ease can i cum, mommy?” she whined, voice breaking with every thrust of your fingers, wet squelching in the background a sign of her neediness.

“let me hear you, baby,” you heard yourself coo through the screen, the video becoming shaky as you picked up your pace— before suddenly ending on accident right as ellie let out a strangled whimper.

you met it with one of your own, frustrated with being left on an unfinished high, the throbbing at your core impossible to ignore.

your thighs shifted against one another, wetness pooling in your underwear as you replayed ellie’s final sound in your head over and over again.

your trance was broken by the sound of a frustrated groan coming from behind ellie’s door.

“fuck, i got it this time, i got it, swear,” she cursed as the game’s recognizable ‘revive’ audio cue played.

she could just do this again next week, right?

without a second longer of thinking, you quickly screen-shotted a clear frame from the video, shooting it ellie’s way and sending a quick text to follow.

~~

ellie choked on her own spit as she clicked the blur away. cough- “fuck-“ wheeze- “shit-“ hack- “sorry, guys, j choked on my own saliva.”

what the fuck? what games were you trying to play?

you groaned, hearing the firing of guns continue on alongside ellie’s commentary.

sliding your panties aside, you spread your legs to display the mess between them, snapping a quick picture.

you shot back another text.

“just one more hit, one more one more one m- i- fuck,” you hear ellie stutter. “oh fuck, yep… and i’m dead, ‘kay, sorry guys just give me like 5 i’ll be back. gotta take care of something.”

you heard the slam of her headphones hitting the table and a screech of her chair sliding back against the hardwood floors.

the door swung open, the look in ellie’s eyes making your heart race with anticipation.

“hey els, good game?” you asked innocently from your position on the couch, legs crossed with your arm resting over the back.

“good game? yeah, great game actually,” she replies sarcastically, sauntering her way over to you. “you didn’t happen to need something, did you?” she asks, hopping onto the couch and quirking an eyebrow up.

“me? no…” you trail off as she leans in to brush a kiss across your lips.

“no?” she tucks your hair aside, before leaning in to whisper, “you mind spreading those pretty legs for me then, baby? i just want a look.”

“els,” you whine, attempting to catch her mouth in a kiss.

she avoids it, dipping down instead to rasp words against your racing pulse, “show me.”

you uncross your legs slowly, a damp patch darkening the very center of your shorts.

ellie grabs the leg closest to her, swiveling your body in one swift move to face her direction, placing that leg over the back of the couch as she runs her other hand up your opposing leg.

“fuck, els, i need you,” you say breathlessly, hips bucking into the air.

“let’s get these off,” she replies with a squeeze, tugging at your waistband. “wanna tell me what’s got you texting me like a slut in the middle of my stream? was it the video? my video?”

she dips her thumb into your leaking hole, swiping your arousal up in a messy circle over your aching clit.

“ah- shit! yes, fuck, y’sounded s-so pretty in it, els,” you moaned, nerves overly sensitive from the wait. “please,” you cried out, unsure of what exactly you were begging for, but you needed more.

“so fuckin’ needy,” ellie laughs under her breath, relishing in the loud groan that escapes your lips when she replaces her hand with her mouth, tongue flicking rhythmically against your swollen clit to draw out more of those pretty sounds.

“oh-oh, god, right there, so good- mmph,” you rock your hips up, hand scrambling to tug ellie’s mouth even closer to you, if possible.

mmhm she moans into your pussy, the vibrations making you jerk up as your legs clamp tightly around her head. ellie’s hands dash up immediately to shove them apart, pressing them wide open with an iron grip as she practically growls, “you asked for this. so fucking take it.”

two of her fingers slide easily into you with the next pull on your clit, and you’re arching up in a manner almost identical to ellie’s in the video, whining nonsensically.

“you’re dripping, baby,” ellie tuts, “just couldn’t wait for me, huh?”

she continues to pump her fingers deep into you, curling them on every outstroke to slide against the spot that makes you see stars.

“c’mon, cum all over my fingers,” she teases, whispering sweet praises between kitten licks to your sensitive clit.

with your head thrown back, you couldn’t help but moan her name like a fucking prayer as your walls started to tighten, legs trembling under her grasp as she worked you through your high.

“that’s it, soak my fucking fingers.”

~

iluvgirls_moms: THAT WAS 1000% A MOAN

elliesleftarm33: guys what the fuck is happening 😀 ellie babes, i think you forgot to mute.

ewilliamsismy_wife: did anyone else j hear ellie’s name. are the voices getting to me?

elliewsjizzfr6996: how to be ellie’s gf no glue no borax? 🥲🥲

1toesuckersslurper: NAH ITS BEEN WELL OVER 10 MIN IM OUTTA HERE

yeahhh… looks like ellie owes her subscribers a real big 10k special next week. and an apology.

[kaiju-krew]

So I know this is like, a month late (forgot to ask when you posted the pic lol), but what's up with Labra? He got like a backstory, lore, or something like that? I'm curious and wanna know more abt him.

drew him again :3c

UHMMM yes i am lore building for him........ i haven't decided everything yet but i know i want him to be a distant cousin species of goji's. everyone's fangoji lore is different but i def imagine him as a part of my personal monsterverse au rather than existing in his own world with no friends haha loser

putting a cut here so i dont spam people's feeds lmao

likeeee for comparison it's probably similar to Crocodylia encompassing crocodiles, alligators, and gharials?? labra is in a similar niche to zilla for me. goji is the largest/apex species of the gojiran order, whereas zilla & labra are smaller and occupy a different niche. Big bruiser lion vs. carcal or lynx type thing.

my hc is that the vast majority of labra's species (pre-mutation art is what they looked like) was wiped out when ghido got into hollow earth. which is also the same time he wiped out most of the divine moths and a couple other species :''(

it ended with ghido iced but it fucked up the hollow earth ecosystem for a while and led to a lot more radiation leakage since he tore the place up real bad. labra was Almost Dead and ended up hibernating to recover by a radiation vent, but he'd laid down in feldspar vein that kinda grew to cover him and turned to labradorite and idk magic radiation nonsense it fused with him and caused him to grow/mutate.

the ghido massacre also caused battra to hibernate/mutate too so it's a Big Event in my silly au world. most of the kaiju that are clearly a result of mutation fuckery (biollante, kessho too) may be related to it as well but i haven't fully fleshed it out yet. it would mostly be based around goji's hyper-regeneration doing the thing where like.. if a big enough chunk of him gets lobbed off and has access to energy it mutates and tries to regenerate and causes a fucked up clone siblings thing idk omg ok i'm in tangent city good god sorry i was supposed to be talking about my gay son

ANYWAYSSSSSS for more general hc/character stuff: >labra is genuinely terrified of ghido and even gets freaked out when he hears wing beats without warning. (mosu beats rodan's ass bcuz he divebombs labra for fun sometimes) >he lives on monster island and ventures down to hollow earth sometimes, but he won't return to his old home because it just reminds him everyone else of his species is gone. (he isn't even his own species anymore bcuz of the mutation. so they're basically extinct.) >he loves swimming and sometimes just lays in the shallows to absorb sunlight. stretches out like a lazy ass cat. cat boy behaviour >he's loyal to goji and doesn't start shit with humans unless they attack first. even then he does his best to steer clear. >mothra likes his dorsal plates and talks with him sometimes (Moth Therapy) they can bond over ghido hating it's a good time >he has a mutually bitch-bother dynamic with rodan where rodan bothers the shit outta him until he manages to grab that turkey and idk sits on him or something. but if rodan really pisses him off he doesn't mind actually throwing hands because he knows goji won't care if he puts the bird in it's place. >he also likes angy, zilla, and bio a lot too.

there's more but i'll stop there for nowwwww

tldr: big gay lizard is traumatized but doing ok ig

[lolitaa-17]

Treat you better.

-Geto Suguru x f!reader You and your boyfriend get into a huge fight over his ex, it was a mistake to even bring her up knowing all he would do is defend her, so why not drink out the pain in a club.

"For gods sake y/n look at yourself!" Your boyfriend says throwing a beer bottle on the floor. "You always fucking bring her up every time? Are that fucking obsessed." The glass from the bear bottle spreading everywhere.

You scoff as the tears run down your face causing your mascara to smudge. "Obsessed? Noah I'm not fucking obsessed! I just know you still fuck her on the low!" You yell; swinging his phone around with your hand. "I've seen the ass pics on your goddamn phone!" You finally chuck it to the floor.

"What the fuck are you doing throwing my shit? Yes, I fuck her! Is that what you wanted to hear?" He throws your car keys as it hits your arm. "Fuck you. Fuck your hoe of an ex and fuck your ugly ass family." You grit as the tears kept falling non stop. Grabbing your car keys and pushing past him. "Don't you even fucking dare call me obsessed with that bitch when you're the one constantly going back to her." And with that you slam the door shut to his house.

All you could hear was the sobs and heels clanking against the concrete floor as you walk to your car. You two were supposed to go to some nightclub that had just opened up, but things obviously took a turn. That didn't stop you though, slamming your car door shut. You started the car and followed to put the windows down.

You were probably the least best of looking right now, mascara smudged all over your eyes. Bruises on your neck. Puffy eyes. But it's not like you were going to the club to find a one nightstand. You were going to drink all the pain away. The music blasting out the windows as the air hits your skin. Your tears still falling uncontrollably.

You stood at the entrance waiting for the security guard to finish checking your ID. "Enjoy." He says giving you a concerned look at your current appearance. You snatch your ID from his hand and push through. The music entering your ears which was much louder than it was outside.

You walk straight to the bar, pushing everyone and anyone who got in your way. You sigh and look at the bartender, he was cute. Hair was in a messy low bun. His eyes were dark as the night sky, or maybe it was just hella dark in the club. "I don't want to sound cliche, but give me the strongest you have." He smirks and nods, "You got it." You look around the nightclub, seeing people all up on each other. Not a worry in mind. You look back at the bartender to see him passing you the drink. "Drink up pretty one." You smile and grab the drink.

And hell was it strong, after another one you were already throwing it back on random men and women. Not caring about what was going around you. You walk back to the bar to see the handsome bartender. "Another one?" you ask and smile. He smiled back and leaned in "My love you look awful right now, i'll give you a water." You hold your arm up and wave your finger in a 'no' motion. "I danced it out already, I'm all good." You slurred while keeping your sweet smile.

"I'll give you another drink, but not as strong. Okay?" He turned around and started getting to work. This time you admired his every move. He had a tattoo on his forearm, it was a dragon. It was hot. You were a sucker for tattoos. He noticed you watching him, he smirked. You were obviously checking him out. "Want a picture beautiful?" He asked as he passed you the bright pink mojito. "Fuck..." you say remembering that you forgot your phone at Noah's house.

You chug the Mojito and grab your car keys completely ignoring wha the bartender said. You hated thinking about the slob of your now ex boyfriend. But you really needed your phone.

You stumble to the parking lot to see your car completely vandalized. Words like "Cunt." "Obsessed" "Bitch" written all over it with spray paint. This bitch was fucking crazy and so was your ex boyfriend. Your tires slashed. This night couldn't possibly get any worse.

"Hey don't run out like- what the hell." The bartender followed you out. Stopping his sentence after seeing how fucked up your was. You start bawling. He was still stunned, wondering what you possibly could've done for this to happen. "Hey...c'mere." He pulls you into his chest, trying to comfort you as much as he can. "He say's i'm obsessed but this is the type of shit he pulls with that bitch." You sob wrapping your arms around tighter around the bartender. "Do you need a ride anywhere? I know you just me me but I can always help." He offered.

You pull away from his grasp and wipe your already smudged eyes. "I'm sorry, I'm y/n by the way." You hold your hand out. He smiles "I'm Geto." He grabs your hand gently and shakes it. You were hesitant about getting a ride from him, but he has been very careful these past hours. Making sure you didn't consume a crazy amount of alcohol or drive while you were intoxicated.

"You don't mind?" You asked a little embarrassed. "Not one bit." He leads you to his car as his hand was on the small of your back. His car was nice. All black Camaro zl1 with custom red interior. "Just give me the address." So you give him the address to your apartment. You wanted nothing to do with your ex right now. But that police report will be turned in by tomorrow.

"So who fucked your car up like that?" Geto asked keeping his eyes on the road while drake was softly playing in the back. "My ex boyfriend. We had a huge argument, which led to the breakup." You turn to look at Geto. His face was more visible. His jaw was sharp, he looked bigger. Muscular. You could hear a scoff coming out of his lips "He's that petty?" You loved the way he immediately degraded your ex. "Yep." you emphasize on the P.

Geto pulled in the parking lot and turns to look at you. His eyes shift down to your neck. Seeing all the bruises of your exes hand. He moves hands towards your neck softly caressing the bruises. "Who the hell is this man?" He whispers. You grab his hand and slowly push it away. "I'll report him tomorrow, thank you for everything." You open the door and get out of his car. You hear him shutting his door as well. "I'm not letting you walk up there alone."

When Geto first saw you he knew you were going through a breakup, the makeup, the drink request, the way you moved your body carelessly while dancing. Seeing you so vulnerable now. He wanted to know more about you.

He was certain that the breakup had nothing to do with you. It was definitely your psychotic ex. He watched the way you limped to the elevator with no shoes, the way you were swaying while you waited for the elevator doors to open. The puffy eyes he made contact with when you smiled at him.

The elevator doors opened and you walked to your apartment while Geto carefully walked behind you. Finally arriving to the door you turn around to look at him. Softly smiling at him, you didn't know why but you engulfed him in a hug and started breaking down again. "Thank you." you whispered as he hugged you back softly. "Of course angel, here call me if you need anything." He tried giving you his phone to put your number in but you look at him, "Do you just want to um, stay?"

You didn't want this to happen, but when you have a sexy man not leaving your side. You couldn't help it.

The shower was running as he left sloppy kisses on your boobs. Making his way up to your neck. He was more gentle here. You move his head to look at you, the pads of your thumb hovering his lips as he was just staring into your soul. No words were exchanged but his eyes said so much. How much he wanted you, how he wanted to take care of you, make sure your safe for the rest of your life.

He turns you around, your breast hitting the glass of the shower. All that was heard was the running water and your soft little gasp here and there. "You deserve the world you know that?" He whispers. You felt his big hangs grab your ass and massage it. "You don't understand how much I want to kill that pathetic little ex of yours." You moan as you feel his fingers entering your wet cunt. Constantly thrusting in deeper and deeper. "Geto.." You whimper as you feel his cock teasing your asshole. One hand inside of you and the other one is trying to guide his dick inside your ass.

"T'much" You moan as feel his dick sliding in and out of your ass. While his other hand was softly hitting that perfect spot inside your cunt. "Is it?" He grunts going a bit slower. "MmYeah." You moan as you reach for his head. He leans in giving sloppy kisses. "Wan me to stop?" he huffs.

It was too much but god you loved it. The gentleness. The euphoric feeling in your body as you feel his speed slowly speeding up you clench your ass, "you don't want me to stop princess do you?" He says in between every kiss he left on your back. "Mffno Geto keep goin." He suddenly stops leaving your asshole and pussy empty. You move your hand down to you clit rubbing it softly to feel something "Mm" You whine.

You can feel his hand wrap around your waist as he's slowly adjusting himself inside that pretty little cunt. "Don't be so needy princess calm down, you'll be begging fa me to stop." He chuckled breathily. You stop him though. "Wait I wan to look at you." He smiles at your request. He felt his cock twitch at just your voice.

Your eyes filled with lust as he lifts you up. You help him adjust his cock into your cunt. "Fuck, you're so big." you squeeze in slight pain but pleasure. This was definitely a new feeling. He was bigger, hotter, genuine and overall fucking great at sex.

"Shhh I know." grabs face and smashes his lips onto yours as he speeds up his pace. The kissing get sloppier and sloppier the fast he thrust into you. The slapping sounds loudly taking over. "f..faster" you pull his long hair as you tried to hold on to him as tightly as possible.

You kept clenching your cunt causing Geto to moan, "Fuck your so tight my love." He felt himself getting close to cumming. "Fuck m'gna cum baby." You were a moaning mess as his tip kept hitting that sweet g spot. "Cum, I..fuck birth control." You slur struggling to even form a sentence.

He watches you take small breathes in your sleep. How you looked so angelic even when you were sleeping. How could such a man do things to you like that. Geto knew he could fix you. That he could Treat you better.

[no-see-um-incorrect]

Yv  Acting AU PT 3

(this is pt 1)

(this is pt 2)

Slight NSFW warning⚠️⚠️

 Interviewer: this first question was submitted by @everything-redacted-and-others

(I answered the second question in the first part)

Interviewer: who forgets their lines the most 

Alphonse: Wow! What a tough question. I’m really going to have to think on this for a second….👀

Seth: Wh- don’t look at me like that!

Alphonse: Oh Kiss my candy ass! you know I’m right!

Seth: OK name one time! that I forgot my lines 

Sugarboo:  in the beginning of your birthday episode, when you and Alphonse were about to go beat the shit out of the goons and Charlie, almost All of the lines in the last episode of Campfire confessions WHICH YOU WROTE!

Alphonse: the conversation before I walked out of the bathroom in bittersweet, when you were in the recording booth for your werewolf special. Would you like me to continue? 

Seth: all right, ya pricks I get it 🙄

————————————————————————

Interviewer: these next questions were submitted by  @antipasto-the-theif

 Interviewer: Seth, what’s your favorite memory on set so far?

Seth: my favorite memory onset so far…..let’s see… OK I got one. it starts out Kind of sad. so basically.  our characters birthdays match our actual birthdays. and on my birthday Alphonse was out of town. You see He wasn’t supposed to be in my birthday video…so I was kind of upset…and all melancholy throughout most the day…until we’re filming and it’s the scene in the kitchen where sugar was supposed to be  the only one there and singing me happy birthday, and Alphonse just pops in!

Alphonse: did you honestly think I was going to miss my favorite cowboy’s birthday~

Seth: so somewhere, there is an outtake of me, spontaneously bawling my eyes out and running off camera to go hug Al 😅

interviewer: OK next question. So, Casper and Charlie, how many times was the prop weed just prop weed?

Casper: we are constantly high on set 

Charlie: like for real 

Casper: we both focus more when we are um…in the clouds..so Yuuri lets us

Charlie: and it’s not like smoked for six hours  before filming high..it’s more we split a special brownie at 5 AM and washed it down with a monster energy high. So we’re not like a danger.

Casper: but yeah, for the 420 video. yeah, that was real 

Charlie: BUT For my birthday, the brownies we were eating were normal brownies, and not special brownies because I was given some special birthday brownies, and wanted to eat them later after dinner..so I guess you could say those were prop brownies,

Interviewer: next question. Auron, the world wants to know the workout routine!

Auron: oh boy well I’m a father running after a toddler with a need for speed which pretty much replaces any sort of missed day at the gym. But other than that and other activities that may or may not involve my spouse…..it’s kind of embarrassing… when I was younger I wanted to be in the MCU and my mother had told me “well those kinds of actors have really strict workout routines. If you want to be like them, you gotta get that down”…… so after much research that’s what I’ve been doing since about 16 years of age…captain America I’m coming for your Brand

Interviewer: onto the next one. What’s the worst blooper you know of, Sugar-Boo?

Sugarboo: 😈 there’s a scene in bittersweet and it’s when Seth finds Alphonse about to essentially kill Charlie, and alphonse grabs Charlie’s face and…..he’s like really aggressive about it so when he grabbed his face, Charlie let out the most….porn star like-moan I have heard come from an individual…And we had to take a five because nobody could stop laughing!

Interviewer: onto the next one. Which cast mate is the least like the character they play??

Seth: I want to say Auron

Alphonse: yeah, yeah I can get behind that

Charlie: I mean, Finn swears like a sailor but other than that….yeah, I’d say Auron 

Seth: Yea Auron in real life is a very sweet man  with a Darlin spouse, and a daughter he adores 

Alphonse: yeah, nothing like the cold Dom boss that you see on the screen.

Charlie: he’s a real sweet guy and he takes time to listen to everybody and help everybody. He helps me with line delivery, helps Faust with costume designs, he helps Jackie with photography when it comes to these snazzy thumbnails we’ve been doing recently.

Alphonse: he’s a lot more like a really helpful and quirky art teacher versus a mysterious and dominant boss.

————————————————————————

Interviewer: the next three questions are from @oceanlue

Interviewer: what was rooks reaction during the shower part?

Rook: 🤭

Auron: you are a shameless Thot my dear~

Rook: A THOT is a Admirer without Action I AM A WHORE i act on my thoughts

Auron: here we go🙃

Rook: SO if you don’t know. I think this was mentioned before BUT…he’s my husband in real life 

Auron: I am. I am your husband

Rook: So when I saw him come out of the Dressing room in nothing but a towel….I Started Catcalling him like a construction worker🤣

Auron: IN FRONT OF EVERYONE no less

Rook: And Then Yuuri gave us the script for the shower scene and I Said OUT LOUD-

Auron: “AWOOGA!” quite enthusiastically…which I found odd because you see me like that EVERY DAY

Rook: Never gets old *Sips coffee*

Interviewer: did auron or rook trip on set

Auron: Yes I did! I completely tripped and fell into Alphonse And I’m so sorry for that!

Alphonse: IT WAS FINE. But that an’t the first time you tripped You also fell into the wall because you stepped on ya own Boot laces 

Interviewer: did auron actually cry in the car ride home?

Auron: yes that was the one time I cried in a scene that Didn’t end up in an outtake

Yuuri: I kinda felt bad too because I didn’t realize he was getting choked up until we finished and he asked for a tissue!

Auron: it’s not uncommon for me to get emotional during scenes like that. They’re lucky that I only got choked up. I would’ve full on sobbed if the scene went any longer. 

————————————————————————

Hope you all enjoyed 

Feel free to ask “interviewer” questions 

I do prefer reblogs and replies, but you can send an ask too if you want 

Make sure to check out pt 1&2 I love making these

I was not Abel to get to all the question I apologize for that🙏

[ashwhowrites]

Puppy love part 2

Part 1

Eddie was afraid to admit how hurt he was by Chrissy's actions. It almost felt like a personal attack. They were slightly friends and she ruined something that could have been really good for him. But why? That's where he was stuck.

Y/N wasn't doing the best either. But unlike Eddie, she knew why Chrissy got involved. She liked him in some sort of way. And she was a cheerleader. How was she supposed to compete with that? Her mind betrayed her the most. Flashing images of Eddie and Chrissy screwing each other for hours. She hated the perfect visuals her mind made. And she hates more than anything that she missed him

~~

Eddie spent all his time in bed. Refusing to talk to Wayne. He felt bad but he didn't want his uncle to see him so weak and sad like this.

"Eddie? Someone is here for you"

Eddie raced to his door. What if it was her?

He opened it, holding his breath. Only to exhale it with an annoyed sigh.

Chrissy fucking Cunningham.

Before she could even say a word, Eddie spoke first, “You shouldn’t have come, I don’t want you here.”

And slammed his door, but her foot caught it before it slammed on her.

"come on Eddie. Don't be like that." She sighed. Opening the door and walking into his room. Shutting the door behind her.

The room was a mess.

"don't be like that? Chrissy you just fucked everything up for me" he tried to stay calm. Not wanting to scream at a woman. He wasn't going to be like his dad. But he was so fucking pissed off.

"okay what did I do?" She asked. Arms crossed over her chest

Eddie took a deep breath

"what did you do? How about you tell me what the fuck you were thinking going up to Y/N and making it seemed like we fucked? Huh? " He snapped. Getting in her face. His deep breaths were barely working. He could feel how hot his skin was. Boiling underneath.

"I didn't tell her we fucked. If she assumed that and got herself hurt then it was her fault, not mine Eddie." She scoffed. Rolling her eyes

"don't fucking roll your eyes. We both know you knew exactly what you were doing. You could have easily come to me to give me my shirt back. But you went to her! How the hell did you even know about our date? You just perfectly knew I told her I was busy. Are you spying on me?" He accused. At this point he wouldn't be surprised.

"that's ridiculous. I do not care about you two and your little crushes that much." She glared

"that much right, so you care a little bit there" he huffed, hand scratching his chin.

She realized her mistake and sighed

"fine. I cared a little bit. I was jealous okay? We were having fun and you liked me. I haven't felt adored like that, in forever. So when she came in and you immediately dropped to her feet. I just felt ignored and forgotten. I acted out of revenge. It was fucked up, I know. I overheard you two make the date plans, I hated how excited you both were. And then you forgot about our deal. I overheard you talking with Wayne at the school so I lied to her. I told her I was with you Friday night. And a part of me really liked seeing her so upset which is so fucking wrong" Her bitchy act was breaking apart. All this time she saw Eddie as a pawn for her life. He was a real person who also had feelings. Her face was falling.

"don't do that. Don’t look at me like you’re sorry. You’re not sorry. You just got caught and now it's coming back to bite you in the ass. She didn't deserve that, hell I didn't deserve that. You used me. I made you feel good? Imagine how I felt Chrissy! Imagine how a loser felt getting noticed by a cheerleader. You made me feel seen. I mean fuck, you kissed me first. I thought the small attention you gave me was all I deserved. And then I met her. And she made me realize how much more I deserved. She likes me because I'm me! She likes that I'm nerdy, that I'm funny. She took time to know who I was, but you never did. You are a selfish, cold hearted bitch and I'll never forgive you for how you hurt her. It didn’t have to be like this, but now you’ve ruined everything. I never want to be near you again. And you better not think about talking to her again."

Chrissy nodded. She deserved every word

"you're right. I'm sorry for doing that to you guys. I really hope you work it out. She does really like you. Can you tell her I'm sorry?"

"no I won't. Because she doesn't need an apology from you. She needs the truth from me. Please leave." He sighed, turning his back to her.

Once he heard her walk out the door, he went back into bed.

Feeling slightly better that Chrissy was out of his life. But now he had to figure out how to make things work with Y/N.

Wayne can't say he knows what happened with Eddie and the girl he really seemed to like. All he knew was Eddie was upset and didn't seem to care to get out of bed. Wayne has been heartbroken before and he can see the similarities in his nephew.

Wayne may have asked around to get the girls address. Once he got it, he headed over. Eddie, still no doubt, sleeping his hours of daylight away.

He knocked politely on the door. Waiting as a teenage girl opened the door.

"can I help you?" She asked. Wayne could tell she was confused but still mannered and polite. He liked that about her.

"are you Y/N?" He asked. The girl nodded hesitantly. ( Maybe it wasn't the best idea to agree until she knew who was asking for her)

"can I ask who you are?"

"I'm Wayne. Eddie's uncle"

She froze hearing Eddie's name.

"is he okay?" She asked quickly.

Wayne could see the fear filling her eyes. Realizing that maybe showing up unannounced might cause her to panic.

"shit. Yes. Well kinda. Physically he is okay. He's safe! Just at home, emotionally destroyed. He won't tell me what exactly happened but I know he's very upset. And he won't talk to me. And as a very concerned guardian, I wanted to ask you for help." He stated. Watching as the girl went through many different emotions. Wayne can easily read people, something he wished Eddie learned from him. He's watched too many people use Eddie for their own gain.

"look I'm sorry that he's upset. But we aren't really on talking terms. If he won't get out of bed to talk to you then I'm not sure what I'm needed for" She apologized. She was upset too. She was hurt. She's the one who got ditched for someone else. Having to feel the embarrassment every time she thought of him.

"I understand that completely. But I was a teenage boy once. And there were times in my life that only one person could get me to roll out of bed." He smiled gently.

Her eyes flashed with warmth. He knew he got her there

"can I ask you something?" She asked

He nodded

"how do I know you are actually Wayne? Not some guy he hired to get me to go see him? Do you have baby pictures of him ?" She asked, cleaning her arms. She doesn't actually think Eddie would pay to lie to her. But she also believed that he liked her and she was proved wrong there.

Wayne laughed, "ah she's beautiful and skeptical. I see why he likes you." The thought of Eddie telling Wayne he liked her made her blush. But she was still questioning the situation.

"I carry one in my wallet I can show. But if you come with me, maybe try to talk to him, I will show you the endless photo albums of baby Eddie all the way to who you know today. Deal?" He asked, he knew he had her wanting to see Eddie the second she heard he was upset. He appreciated the fight she put up though. Someone stubborn and worked to get their way was exactly what Eddie needed in his life.

"depends. What were you doing Friday night?" She asked

"fixing an old car but the skills needed only Eddie knew how to do so worked with him, why?" He didn't know what that had to do with anything.

"let me grab my jacket."

~~

Eddie rolled his eyes as Wayne knocked on his door yet again

"STILL DON'T WANT TO TALK!" he yelled, throwing his face in his pillow

"I got her" he heard Wayne say calmly through the door.

Eddie sprung out of bed and threw open his bedroom door

Eyes widening as she stood behind him, a shy wave as she checked him over.

"oh shit. Come in" he said, moving over so she could pass through.

He mouthed a thank you to Wayne, in return, Wayne threw him a wink and thumbs up.

Eddie took a deep breath and sat on his bed. She stood across from him. Arms covering herself, like it was some sort of protection.

"Wayne was worried about you and asked me to come talk to you." She explained.

"you agreed, so you must still care about me?" He asked, hopeful

"still a good friend of mine Eddie but I can't tell who's telling the truth and who's lying to me" she sighed. She felt like she should trust Eddie. She knew who Eddie was, this Chrissy girl though? She just met her. But she's been too hurt in the past to ignore when her feelings get hurt. She deserved to question people's motives.

"can I explain? Maybe explain what my part of the story looks like and help paint a picture?" He asked.

She came to get answers and he would provide all the answers he has.

She nodded and gave him the floor.

"Chrissy and I used to hang out. We did deals. She paid for weed in money and sometimes with her tongue . But her and I have never once had sex or even done anything majorly sexual with each other. We weren't like that. She had my shirt because she came over for a deal and spilled water on her shirt. She asked if she could borrow a shirt and I said yes. That's why she had it. Not because of whatever lie she told you. " He explained. Praying that she would believe the truth in his words.

" do you like her Eddie?"

"I really thought I did. But I think I liked having someone's attention." He admitted. He knew now he never liked Chrissy, he liked that she saw him. Once he met Y/N, he realized what having real feelings felt like.

"is that why you like me?" She asked. She feared the cycle was repeating. She feared that a new girl would give him attention so he was occupied. What happens if another girl walks in the door?

"absolutely not. I like you because I actually adore you so much. We have a connection, we have something that makes me feel real things, and good things. The way I feel with you, I never felt with Chrissy. I can't even describe how disappointed I was in letting you drive off. Not explaining in enough time. Disappointed I sat here in bed, letting you think and ponder on the idea I slept with another girl. I just want you. And I want that date. And even more dates. I want to be with you."

"I really would like to be with you too. I should have given you time to explain before accusing you and leaving. I apologize for that." She apologized

"no need to apologize. Chrissy painted a pretty convincing picture and I'm sorry she put you through that because of her own issues. But she won't be around at all, I promise." His hand reached out to hers slowly. Still fearing rejection.

She noticed how he was hesitant to touch her so she laced their fingers together. Smiling at him as she sat next to him.

"can I please ask you on another date?" He asked, turning his head to look at her.

"absolutely Eddie"

~~

Eddie was getting ready for his do over date. This time he wasn't going to take her to a public place. He wanted it to be private. Somewhere he only would focus on her.

Wayne and him spent time in the kitchen. Making a pasta dinner with salad and garlic bread.

"holy shit Wayne, how did I not know you were a chef?' Eddie joked. Watching as Wayne made the most amazing looking pasta.

"used to do it a lot. And look at you. Never thought I'd see the day Eddie Munson cooked a meal for a girl." Wayne smirked as Eddie blushed. Packing the food in a picnic basket.

"you do crazy shit when you like someone right?"

"like someone? No Eddie. You are falling for that girl." Eddie smiled and shook his head

"don't plan the wedding yet uncle Wayne" he joked, laughing as he snuck a few beers when Wayne turned his back

"bet after this date, you'll be planning it yourself" Wayne said back.

He hugged Eddie on his way out. Wishing him luck.

~~

Eddie was nervous the whole way to her house. He wasn't sure if she even liked pasta or romantic gestures. But he was hopeful. He sighed and grabbed the flowers that Wayne picked out. He wiped his sweaty hands on his jeans and knocked on her door.

Breath taken right out of his body when she opened the door. She stood there with a huge smile. She was in blue jeans, white sneakers and a band tshirt but as he looked closer he realized, it was his. It was his band

"you like?" She giggled, giving a twirl. Her ponytail swinging as she spun

Her lips stretched with pink gloss. Eyes decorated with pink glitter and black mascara. Her outfit was simple and he wanted to fall on his knees.

"you are fucking gorgeous. Where did you get that shirt?" He laughed

"I may have made it" she shrugged. Now noticing the flowers in his hands.

"are those for me?' she asked shyly. He nodded fast and passed them over. Tingles shivering through his body as his fingers touched hers.

"they are beautiful. Come inside, I'll grab a vase!" She said. He followed her in the house. Smiling at photos of her as a child.

Together they headed to Eddie's mystery location.

"what do you have planned?" She asked as he parked his van at a park

"food and hopefully a steamy make out under the stars." He threw a wink at her and he got out of his van. Running to her side of the door, opening it.

"you have high hopes I see" she giggled. Blushing at the thought of kissing him for the first time. She thanked him for opening her door. Walking very close to him as he led her to an open spot in the park.

Eddie laid down a blanket and asked her to sit. Placing down a picnic basket and sitting next to her

"Wayne and I made pasta, salad, and bread. I also snuck a few beers but also have water" she smiled at how proud he looked taking out the dishes. Her heart was so warmed at the thought of him cooking in his kitchen just for her. She hated that she doubted him.

"all of it sounds amazing. Thank you Eddie" she said and kissed his cheek. He blushed and handed her a fork and together they dug in.

Talking about random shit as they cleared out the containers of food.

After they ate, they stayed for a little longer. The night grew a tad closer and Eddie noticed her shivering.

He quickly took off his leather jacket and placed it on her shoulders

"no you'll be cold" she said, trying to take it off

"nah. I'm fine. Please keep it. You look good in my clothes" she blushed again. It was like he knew exactly how to make her want to kick her feet and scream into a pillow.

She scooted closer to him as she sipped on the can of beer. He threw his arm around her as he stared at her. Watching as she looked up at the stars.

"I could just stare at you forever” he whispered.

Her head turned to face him. Realizing just how close he was. She could see every detail on his face.

"creep" she whispered. A small smile on her lips. He chuckled at her response.

"can I kiss you?" He asked. Eyes dropping to her glossy lips.

She nodded, staring right back at his pink lips. She watched as he wetted them with his tongue. Turning his head as his finger touched underneath her chin, pushing it up slightly. She turned her head in the opposite direction. Leaning in with him.

Closing her eyes as she felt his lip touch hers. She practically whined about how soft his lips were. He took control of the kiss. A hand on her neck as he kissed her harder. Her free hand, that wasn't holding her beer, laid on top of his hand on her neck. Kissing him even harder than he was.

He licked her bottom lip, begging to taste her. She opened her mouth immediately. Loving the sound of the growl that left his throat when his tongue made contact with hers. His tongue was warm and fighting with hers. His other hand wrapped itself around her. Pushing her body against his.

He hated that he needed to pull away for air.

His lips were sticky but he liked it. Her eyes were blown out and lips red.

"that was even better than I thought it would be" he admitted

Already missing her lips, going in to kiss her again. She kissed back just as fast. She thinks kissing him might be her new favorite thing.

~~

He stood outside her front door. Disappointed that the date had to end.

"I wish I could spend every moment with you" he admitted

"me too eds"

"I'm so lucky to know you. Thank you for making me feel things I never thought I could" he whispered, forehead leaning against hers

"shut up. I was the new girl and I am so glad I got to meet you first" she said softly, pecking his lips slightly

"I'm usually not that kind of girl, especially on a first date, but would you want to come inside? Watch a movie or something?" She asked

"definitely" he smiled. Following behind her.

Now this is the love Eddie deserved.

Tags!

-@bmunson86 @mxcheese @ladymunson @michaelfuckinglangdon @z0mbie-blah @biittersweet @mirrorsstuff @slightlyvicked @micheledawn1975 @ago-godance @magnificantmermaid @tlclick73 @audhd-dragonaut @eddiesluvt @marianita195 @cocok1ttie @skirting-punk @bibieddiesgf @tiannamortis @makingmunson94 @lail1010 @lightcommastix @magnificantmermaid @kellysimagines @tayhar811 @griffienn @amyo111 @cedricscoffin

[benewol]

beat the shit out of them [Vin Jin x Reader]

this work is heavily influenced by @wannaeatramyeon 's works, especially her unhinged reader fic featuring vin!! no warnings, reader can also be considered genderneutral as far as im concerned just a bunch of cussing tbh. hope you enjoy :))

"Vin Jin."

...

"Hey, Vin Jin."

...

"I'm fucking talking to you!"

The next thing he feels is a harsh smack on the back of his head as he quickly catches himself before the chair can tip over.

"The fuck do you want?! Fucking crazy ass bitch," he rubs the now throbbing, sore spot you gave him, face scrunching up as usual.

Dramatic motherfucker.

"If you didn't tint your glasses over so much you wouldn't be getting smacked. You would've seen me preparing to swing, too," you smirk in retaliation, your arms moving from their crossed position to resting next to your sides while you're leaning against his table.

He merely sends you what you think is probably supposed to be a nasty glare and re-positions his legs on that same table, nudging your back with his polished sneakers.

So you continue talking.

"Mary's been trying to gesture for you to leave the classroom without making a commotion, you know."

"Okay, and?"

"Your bff needs you and that's all you can say? Really?" You roll your eyes.

"Can't be so important if it only took you to solve it."

"Fuck off."

"Lol, you first."

"Sure. Tell me why you keep tinting your glasses and I will."

His eyes furrow inquisitively.

"I don't need to do shit. Class is starting soon so you need to move your fat ass soon anyway, might as well do it immediately," his smug smile one of those you'd love to fill with a pile of some of his ridiculous sheets of lyrics crumpled up.

That's a good idea. You're adding that to your list titled 'what would piss vincent the fuck off'.

"Your sense of time is, unsurprisingly, tremendously shit. We have another half an hour left, you moron," you reach out your hand to flick his wide forehead, which he now sees coming and dodges, catching himself before falling yet again.

What a fucking loser, you shake your head and keep yourself from succumbing to laughter.

"Whatever. I'm not showing you shit."

"Come on. I'm sure whatever it is you're blowing it out of proportion," you reach out again to touch his glasses.

He reaches out too. To stop your hand from moving towards his sunglasses. And his grip is not as harsh as you'd expected it to be.

"Stop it. If you see it, I'll have to kill you."

"See what? You're being so ominous. Do you have weird rectangular pupils like goats or what?"

He sputters for a moment.

"That'd be funny."

"The fuck?"

"You could come up with a line like 'my eyes are like those of a goat, yeah, I'm the GOAT'," you press your lips together to stop the laughter from spilling out of your mouth.

That line was good.

He won't tell you that, though, because you were way too close to uncovering the truth.

He huffs, turning his head away from you and crossing his arms in front of his chest.

What he doesn't know is that his oh-so-clever self forgot to re-tint his glasses.

This in turn means the sun's rays hit his lenses so nicely you were able to catch a tiny glimpse of his two grey irises and the resulting pupils in his left eye.

Your breath catches in your throat.

A soft gasp makes his head turn back to you, his eyebrows shooting up in surprise.

"What's that? Pulling a stupid line like that and immediately growing quiet?" He mumbles to mask his alarm.

You hum, and he notices your solemn expression, making him grow apprehensive.

"Weren't you Cheonliang's number one?"

"Still am."

"And Allied's number two?"

"Yeah."

"How come you don't just lose the shades and simply beat the shit out of anyone who comments on your eyes, then?"

He stares at you. Still occasionally having rubbed the wound you'd inflicted on the back of his head, he loosens his arms which were crossed behind it.

Placing them on his thighs, he balls his fists.

"Shut up."

He abruptly stands up and moves towards the door, shaking the table you were leaning against, making you furrow your brows in irritation.

Typical.

At least you'll know where to find him.

If things don't go his way, he'll just lock himself in the boys' bathroom and listen to one of Duke's albums.

You don't intend letting him flee the scene this time, though.

"Don't you dare run away now."

He doesn't know why, but he halts in his steps.

"Or else what, pipsqueak?"

He turns back towards you.

"Your eye adds to your nonexistent charm."

...

"Hello?"

...

"Earth to Vincent?" You wave your hand in front of his shielded eyes.

Turning on his heel, he doesn't leave without wanting to have the last word.

"Fucking weirdo, I don't need your pity."

"Asshole, I'm not pitying you!!"

What you fail to see is the faintest of rose-coloured blushes on Vin's cheeks as he puckers his lips, absentmindedly scratching at his lenses while sauntering down the hallway.

[understandableparadox]

I think a fundamental problem with a lot of vampire media is that a vampire is not supposed to be a zombie. it is supposed to be a human who surrendered to their own vices and flaws. the flaws of cowardice in the face of death and the vices of pleasure and gluttony.

which is why vampires can be made very versatile. As much as I don't really like Twilight, it is still a story of dealing with vices with creatures that fundamentally have allowed themselves to be dominated by them.

which is why i really like the movie Renfield.

THATS RIGHT YOU BITCH ASS MOTHERFUCKER YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO READ A SCATCHING BITCH AND MOAN SESSION ABOUT THE SATURATION OF SHITTY VAMPIRE MOVIES BUT NOW YOUR TRAPPED HERE READING MY THOUGHTS AND OPINIONS ON A NICK CAGE MOVIE, SIT DOWN SWEETHEART IM NOT GONNA BE DONE YAPPING FOR A FUCKING COUNTRY MINUTE

Renfield 2023 is a movie starring Nicholas Hoult, Nicolas Cage and Awkwafina.

Renfield if you do not know is the fanatical familiar from the original bram stokers dracula movie. the human who in exchange for aiding dracula in their dark dealings would perhaps gift him with the same dark curse, making renfield a fellow child of the night.

This movie takes place Years afterwards after a very serious battle with the last vampire hunters of the modern day and age. Dracula has suffered Severe damage from the fight and has Renfield aid him in taking refuge within the depths of an asylum while he recovers.

Here we get into the meat and potatoes of the movie, as much of a sin as it sounds, it does focus on nick cage as dracula but instead on nicholas holt as the aforementioned Stooge prime renfield. Renfield, between his random killings in order to sate the blood lust of his master, becomes more and more acquainted with the new modern world, undergoing the most harrowing journey of them all...

Therapy. 

Renfield over the years has lost his spark of mad fanaticism and is worried not only with his relationship with Dracula but his relationship with himself. Aiding at least one by attending an abusive partners support group to find victims. Mostly abusive partners and criminals.  

This is very notable because it's already setting up the original themes of vampires. Your cowardice and your vices. It sets up Renfield as a true coward whose vice is his love of dracula, or more exactly his desire to  Be Like dracula. Enough so that even though he wants to feel better about himself- to feel less like a monster- he still follows dracula's demands in killing people who he has decided to pass judgment on. 

Oh sorry i forgot a detail, renfield is a power ranger and his morpher is eating bugs. He gains some vampire powers everytime he eats a bug and does some john wick shit but thats not my deal, i dont care if renfield can do a sick back flip and punch a guy (complete fucking lie, the action scenes in this movie are so god damn rad sometimes, please watch this movie, please please please!!!)

The movie splits into a couple of different story lines. One being Renfield attempting to balance his burgeoning need to have a functioning moral compass and his romance with awkwafina character, rebecca the detective. Rebecca the detective attempting to balance both the rash of murder cases and a rash of mob related crimes in order to avenge her father, and the mob themselves attempting to figure out who is wiping out their foot soldiers. 

I'm not going to harp on the story for long so let's start talking about renfield. 

Renfield is a hypocrite, and it's made apparent throughout the film that he is a hypocrite. Despite wanting to be a good person he is still a murder. He has doomed multiple people to die across the world. He left his wife and child to be with dracula. He has done so much to cut himself off from his own humanity that it's almost insane that he wants to run back to it because Dracula has not yet answered renfields desire to be a true vampire. 

This all is blended into the idea of having dracula be a parallel to an abusive narcissistic partner in a relationship. Which in all accounts throughout the movie is true and we're going to bounce back and forth from that for a bit so buckle up bud. 

The main ire of the movie is that Renfield wants to push his problems that he has gained away onto Dracula without acknowledging his roles in them. Again we see that cowardice. Renfield cannot stand to see his own faults. He listens to Dracula both out of fear and admiration. At the start of the movie I mentioned that Dracula sustained heavy hits from the last vampire hunters. Well I forgot to mention how he survived. Lets go ahead and listen in Real Close to what he says 

The hunters had dracula dead to rights if you can dare to pardon my puns. Trapped in a binding circle, burning in holy flames and about to get skewered through his heart. The dialogue is specific, Dracula makes no specific promises but notes that Renfield is complicit and that regardless of whatever Dracula has done, he is still his greatest ally. We play on that cowardice and that vice. That desire to be near dracula or be like dracula contrasted with his fear of the repercussions of his actions. 

Snap back to reality and we see that Renfield is still struggling with this. He does not want to face the repercussions of his actions so he continues doing as instructed by Dracula while also indulging in his vices, his desire for escapism by delving into all of these new things. Vigilantism, pushing his problems onto dracula, pretending that he is at the moment capable of having a new life while still using dracula's powers to attain it. 

Ah but now we need to introduce the main concept of this film. That being the portrayal of Dracula as an abusive partner with narcissism. Dracula plays on renfields, and says it with me in class, Vices and Cowardice. He knows what to say to make Renfield back down. He knows all his fuck ups and exactly what renfield wants, that being to have a simple life with dracula, but not in a gay way of course, we still have to have a straight romance sub plot, i mean its insane to think that renfield wants to bone dracula its not like dracula promises to be his salvation while he is suspended in air in a soft whispery voice while renfield stares at him with all the gale of a oculerly enlarged puppy but hey what do i know? I unironiclly read isekais, my media literacy must be that of a brain dead lemur. 

We can see this played out in this scene here

Dracula knows how to keep the hook in renfield's mouth both taught and loose enough to keep him at the perfect level of knuckle dragging dejection to ensure that he runs back begging. In that while yes he is right that renfield at so many points gave in to his own desires and *coy eye to the audience as I listen to them scream “vices” at me.*. He has begun to make an earnest attempt to become a better person. Better late than never. 

Thus renfields true growth is him rejecting that which made him so close with dracula, the rejection of what makes a vampire and vampire. He embraces his cowardice by both admitting to what he is and now allowing himself to push his own crimes onto dracula, and then standing up to dracula, and then rejecting his vices when once again dracula makes him the same offer. To be that same shield towards himself and his own shortcomings rather than deal with a life without a master. Despite it being possible in the future coming with the promise of being a full vampire like himself. 

Look guys, let's not juggle bowling pins and call it arm wrestling, Watch Renfield. Its a good movie and nick cage is fucking awasome, thanks.

[kafkaoftherubble]

把死人给带回来？ 难道...?！

// If They Are Bringing Back the Dead...

This post contains spoilers for Chapter 184.1 of To Your Eternity.

It also contains speculations galore. This is NOT a meta essay.

Shoutout to my homie branetheory in Discord!

Thanks to them, I was reminded of what Parts of My Brain had wanted to talk about:

Bruh. I can't believe ToFu made me so high last night that I forgot to talk about this.

Honestly I regret nothing Okay, memory water.

A little Kafka Aside: I'm gonna have to consciously ignore how... not-there the scientific backing for this is. Honestly, this Memory Water thing reminded me of the New Age/Pseudoscientific idea of "water memory" or Masaru Emoto's "water consciousness" thing or DNA teleportation. However, this is a story where weirder shits have happened, so suspension of disbelief willingly and gleefully granted. I just need to get this out of my head first.

To reiterate, Kaibara's experimental procedure involves

Extracting cells from a person's body

"Turn" it into water (how?)

Make a "clone" drink it (who?)

-----------------------------------------------------

Who could these clones be?

The only clones we know so far are the Mizuha clones. Their existence seems to imply a similar purpose to Hayase's descendants—they are supposed to inherit Hayase's Will, which is 95% "get injected with a tumor we call the Left Hand Nokker."

But Nokkers have long become invisible and fully integrated into this ecosystem. In the Future Era, they are embedded in tag chips, and they grant the bodies they possess all sorts of abilities and augmentations.

What would an inheritance of Hayase's Will even look like here? At first, I thought it would be similar: a tag chip with the Left Hand in it. Mizuha's, uh, possession (for the lack of a better word) manifested through the same mechanism other Nokkers used, after all.

However, the story gradually told us that the clones had all been massacred via an unknown operation for yet-untold reasons. Why would they do that?

Were these clones failures?

If they were failures, then it would make sense why Kaibara treated them as disposable; after all, in the past, the Guardians always exalted Hayase's Descendant(s) no matter how incompetent they were at their mission. Failure to secure Fushi's seeds I mean love never made them disposable enough to be killed, right?

So, as branetheory (crediting my homie even though they might not see this ahahhahah) also thought—

Could it be that Hayase herself has been successfully reincarnated in the body of one of these clones? (8)

I assigned this hypothesis an 8, or "80% confidence level."

Is she who you're gonna see, Bon?

Why would Kaibara need so many Mizuha clones in the first place? They only need one Descendant. They only have one Left-Hand Nokker...

Unless these clones were made specifically for bringing back Hayase. They were all experiments. Few experiments ever go right at the first trial. But this? Experiments this challenging and important as "recreating our legendary progenitor, Hayase?"

It will definitely require a lot of trial and error. So these clones were made to be expendables.

Honestly, who would name their offspring with numbers if they weren't meant to be seen as expendables?

----

There is an interesting point to note: Memory Water only works if one has a Nokker implanted in them. Remember how Abel can't drink it and instantly know the answers to their stupid-ass questions?

So do all clones have Nokkers implanted in them? They all own a tag chip, after all. But there is only one Left Hand Nokker, and that bitch seems deadset on possessing only Hayase's appointed heir (or in this case, Hayase herself).

Does that mean

all the clones have their own Nokkers, but none of it is the Left Hand, until the Experiment? (3) OR

all the clones have empty tag chips until the Experiment, in which the Left Hand Nokker is then implanted inside before the subject drinks the Memory Water? (6) OR

other hypotheses I could not think of at the moment? (1)

------------------------------------------

Doro and Her Sisters: Were They Trying To Stage a Rebellion Against Kaibara's Highest Echelon? (7)

Assigned (7); "70% confidence level"

Could this scene actually depict a failed experimental result, where #32/Doro was the subject? After all, she didn't look like she died in a massacre. She looked like she died alone, leaving her sisters behind..

Doro liaisoned with Fushi in secret. So secretly, Tonari didn't know it happened.

Why would she do that? Way back then, me and the Discord gang had speculated some sort of clash between Doro and the rest of Kaibara. At that time, I think our speculation was that it had to do with the Wish-granting Orb specifically.

But now, with this new information in mind...

Could it be that the liaison was part of the clones' planned rebellion? (6)

Assigned 6; "60% confidence level."

It could be that, in addition to passing vital information about Kaibara to Fushi (who is still not exactly forthcoming about what they know so far), Doro was also trying to ensure that the Wish-granting Orb will never fall into the Highest Echelon's hands.

Was her conviction formed out of concerns about what Kaibara might do with the orb?

Or was her reasoning more pragmatic—she didn't want Kaibara to have the power to crush her rebellion?

----

Back to the number-as-naming convention. What if these weren't names, but the assigned turn of each clone for the ultimate experiment (6)? If that's the case, then Doro is the 32nd experiment that failed.

That's a lot. And the fact that she failed would mean the experiment will keep going. The clones will keep being bred to be used for these experiments. It's a conflict ripe for seeds of rebellion, right?

And so, there are extra hypotheses as to why the clones were massacred in the first place:

Hayase has been successfully reincarnated (8)

The clones' rebellion plan has been found out (7)

Hayase has been successfully reincarnated AND the clones' rebellion plan has been found out (5.6; 8/10×7/10)

----------------------------------------

Dolly's Purpose(s)

While Doll's original purpose might have been for amusement and fun—Doro rescued it from some trash heap and just engineered it to be a playmate—I had always found its ability to dish out powerful punches suspicious. Why would a playmate be good at granting people concussions in the first place?!

And it was good enough to take out mercenaries, right?

I'm quite confident that Doll's punch is a defensive ability to guard whatever's stored in its memory (9).

I should review what Previous Me had speculated:

Doll holds Doro's brainwaves or consciousness

Doll holds the Left Hand Nokker within it

Doll is a combination of Doro's consciousness/brainwaves and its original AI

There is also the speculation that Doll is the Wish-granting Orb itself, but I think the confidence level for that hypothesis has gone pretty low... at least to me, personally. It sits at less than 10%.

Now, I want to add new hypotheses and rearrange them from most confident to least:

Doll's memories include Kaibara's top secret: key infrastructures, their real master(s), their experiments, whatever information they have gained about the Wish-granting Orb, their master plan to counter Fushi, and the like. Things that could give rebelling clones an edge. (8)

Doll holds Doro's brainwaves/consciousness integrated within its original AI (7)

Doll holds Doro's brainwaves/consciousness AND it is Doro's consciousness/memories that possess knowledge of Kaibara's top secret (5.6; 8/10×7/10)

Doll holds the Left Hand Nokker (less than 2)

The first (and by extension, the third) hypothesis can be supplemented by the fact that Kaibara really wants the Doll. Why, if not because the Doll holds vital information regarding the entire company?

They could go after it for Doro's consciousness, sure, but the priority would drop a lot more, wouldn't it? ...Unless the third hypothesis is true!

The second hypothesis can be partially supplemented by Abel's dedication to possessing the Doll; he really cherished Doro, and to him, the Doll could lead him to her again. He also claimed that Doro "is still alive," though when pressed, he gave no evidence.

Was it wistful thinking, or could he have been privy to Doro's experiment to transfer her consciousness into Doll? Did he really know nothing about Doro's death?

There is also the "Now I am human" line Doro uttered while blindfolded. Given we now know what the clones are used for, Doro might see her existence to be inhuman/subhuman because of her real purpose. Maybe, to her, she could feel more human by being a doll than in her human body.

Hell, who knows? Doro might secretly envy Abel's humanness—a guy who was likely born from normal copulation and couldn't fit in with the rest of the Tagged society, yet all the more a genuine human being than the rest of them.

-----------------------------------

What is the nature of Doll's Brainwaves?

Could it have been a digital transfer, or could it have used a similar mechanism to the Memory Water?

----------------------------------

Miscellaneous Implications of Memory Water Bringing Back the Dead

Bruh I swear if they reincarnated the Nameless Boy to torment Fushi I will fucking sever my friendship with Left Hand Nokker and nuke their Paradise. Oh hi Left Hand, nothing over here.

----------------------------------

And that concludes my hypotheses round-up, updated to only Chapter 184.1. Remember! Y'all are always welcome to reblog and add your own thoughts to it!

Fuck, I will be so honored if y'all Fushi-fied my writing by adding absolutely anything.

Thank you for reading my ramble. Rest assured, I have prepared just the right image for the moment I clown myself by having most of my hypotheses come out spectacularly falsified:

(Hi everyone this is Kei from Ajin)

[cinamun]

WHEW!! That wedding was A LOT

But now that its over, I can complain about this shit! No wonder everyone said MWS was fucked. Anyway... I didn't get nearly as many bloopers as I wanted to because I was trying to concentrate and it was literally the last day of Spring so I had to preserve as much sunlight as I could. Basically, Indya is a global celebrity so the amount of random fucking people that kept showing up and passing out made veins I didn't know I had continuously pop out of my forehead and steam shoot out of my ears.

But this one, right here, kept popping up and scaring the shit out of me.

Sneaking behind the corner trynna get some cake n shit

BRO LIKE TAKE YOUR FELONIOUS ASS BACK TO THE PENTHOUSE!

And the reason you don't see anyone in the background of the first dance between Hope and her new husband is because while he was waiting for her....

Harpo? Who deez people? One bitch came in some lingerie like she didn't get the memo that it was a private wedding at not a bach party. One of them doesn't even have a fucking face (I discovered this after I downloaded that Ihop lot)! And the KIDS! Kids kept showing up and you can't tell them to "just go away" and I was gonna kill them with MCCC but I'm not that cold-hearted. They're just kids, man. So the beautiful dance pictures you see had all this shit going on in the background: Indya making drinks, random pantless kid, faceless lady and the little heffa who is supposed to be in Copperdale.

This was my first MWS-led wedding. The rice throwing was cute, but I couldn't get a pic because the bride and groom just stand there looking stupid and I forgot to turn off the DOF so you couldn't see the rice anyway. I loved the walking down the aisle and we didn't get sky confetti but we got fireworks during the kiss at the altar which was nice. I love how its not a timed event so you can actually do everything without rushing. I'm sure there are mods to prevent some of what happened from happening but ya girl wasn't about to go downloading a bunch of mods. I honestly did not realize it was day 13 of Spring when Jay was doing those squats you feel me? So this was just as much of a rush for me as it was for them.

5/10 would kinda recommend.

[crimson0lake]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BROTHER!!

Happy (late) birthdays, Chuuya Nakahara!

Warnings: curses, mentions of knives, siblings being siblings, spoilers for upcoming chapters of bsd: One Time Sanity

.

.

.

"ughh" with a groan the ginger slowly sits up on the bed, feeling his head already start to ache from how much his, somehow, sibling shout.

He rubs his eyes, trying to shake off the sleepiness on him. His eyes look around the room he stays in, an old guest room which is now his own room in Haruto's flat.

"that bitch... Andres took my hat again.. for the seventh time..." He mumbles to himself before standing up and walking out of his room with an annoyed and irritated look. His clothes and sometimes wines were getting missing, clearly his reckless and annoying shit brother taking them, both having an one sided argument in the end everyday cause of it.

"ANDRES!! It's my first and last warning! Give my hat back or I'm gonna kick your ass!?" He rubbed his temples while shouting towards the big living room where a reply came without a second.

"Nuh uh"

"THE FUCK TOU MEAN 'NUH UH'?!?!?!"

"Nuh uh, fuck off"

A chuckle comes from the living room before Andres speaks up again

"FINE FINE.. I'll give it to you if you grow 2 inches in the next month!"

"I'M GONNA SHOVE THAT BROOM IN YOU ASS" Chuuya yelled angrily making his way towards the living room with flustered and angry face but his steps pause when the living room's lights suddenly go off and the flat falls silent.

"..." He was all confused and couldn't help but look around to see if anything was out of ordinary but finds nothing.

"Uhh... Guys? Are you alright?"

No answer comes from the living room only some sounds of footsteps.

'if it's another prank... I'm surely killing those two today...' Chuuya thinks as he slowly make his way to the living room before stepping inside the darkness.

After a couple of steps, where he suppose to be middle of the room, the lights suddenly turn on, causing his eyes to flash and slightly burn with sudden light before they open wide despite the burnt with the sound of synchronized voices.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!"

"wh-what..?" The ginger could only look at the three infront of him with confusion, he even forgot it was his birthday due to all those works and stuff happening in a short amount of time. Also, he don't remember telling them his birthday- How the fuck they knew about it?!

Luna approached him while holding the barely together cake with baking gloves. She smiles up at him while Andres and Haruto tes a sudden photo, using the rare opportunity of Chuuya's down guard.

"it's not much, but I only could do this much with the little ingredients we had... Sorry for that" Luna said after seeing Chuuya's still shocked and confused look towards the cake in her hands.

"No no.. it looks very good!.. I just wasn't expecting you guys to remember it.." The ginger only could utter the words out under his breath as he overcomes his shock slowly and runs his fingers back of his neck, trying to regain his composure.

His words had made the other two turn to him, making Haruto let out a amused chuckle before throwing one of his arms around Chuuya's shoulders.

"Of course we remember! What did you think?"

"we also remember how much you like those brand wines!" Luna continued with a smile before Andres added with a grin while wearing Chuuya's hat still

"and how much you care about your hats"

The twins go on and on of how much they knew Chuuya while haruto chuckled before clearing his throat and turning to Chuuya with a grin, meanwhile Chuuya was trying to wipe the tears that are forming in his eyes with a chuckle.

"the thing they are trying to say is that, you are a part of the family. We would know even the slightest details you don't even know about yourself. You are our brother; Even if you are a mafioso, even if you are strong. And even if you are short!"

The last sentence made Chuuya lightly punch Haruto's arm before the man laughs and turns away to go to the kitchen

"Now let's not waste more time and keep the cake waiting, or Andres and Luna would waste no second to clean the whole cake in just a few minutes.

[carmenized-onions]

chap pap 2 - electric boogaloo (well actually it’s about plumbing)

you ever start writing and you just cannot seem to find an end so you keep going forever? yeah. - 🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️ i would kill to read your drafts anyhooo

Sitting in the back corner booth (your favourite) with Syd - yoooo the one she sat in with carmy and also mikey’s carving!! tony’s restaurant!! the circles are circling

“You wish you were dead when you’re there, but you’d rather be dead than do anything else?” - onion you are just describing life on a movie set (also i want to find a new nickname for you but i’m struggling)

“Dad cut the cord on his business phone when it transferred to me” - not entirely true now is it chippy!! well maybe it is but i just remember the thing about her not wanting people to be able to reach her after mikey

squidink are so cute, their lil morning date, and what’d you know they shared a smoochy smooch after

You would argue you're not even that close, but he'd slap you upside the head. - AS HE SHOULD!! (i’d go to war for their friendship)

you told Mikey he was getting a mold problem. - chippy is just superior

“S’been a while since he’s had a good influence.” - chippy being close with louis and eva just makes me:’))))

“I’m just saying, you’re alike.” - the way they all see it. oh be still my beating heart

He makes you jump for it - my 5’1 ass would be fucked. i mean i would TRY, trust, but

if you take all his names. - kicking ass and taking names, literally

On your way to the kitchen, you’re stopped and walked backwards to a booth in the corner by Richie. - this makes me emotional. i love them so much stop

not Richie coming with your ice water, but Carmen - pookie!!! wait now i just see the word poo, okay scratch that- BABYBOY!!!<3<3

He pauses mid slide into the booth, sitting across from you. He seemed all cool and collected and is now suddenly extremely caught off guard. Already sweaty. “Y-yeah, I’m better, thank you—” - this is the cutest interaction in the whole series. YEAH I SAID IT

“Carmy is fine. Tony is fine?” “I’m doing okay, yeah.” - HOW AM I NOT SUPPOSED TO BE UNHEALTHILY OBSESSED WITH THEM

You nod down at the dish. “Do the thing.” - i mean i know she’s the guy, but the way they seem so comfortable with each other (like old friends) already is so special to me

Two things can be true - they can!!

“It’s the plate, isn’t it? I told Syd—” - the plate 🥹 rip to a real one (jk it survived, but it was almost a frisbee)

You put a hand on his knee to stop the shaking - now i’m shaking

You’re nothing. You’re— - she and carmy are soooo similar ugh

“Who needs a coffee? Or water?” - my fave barista!!

Marcus has fresh coffee beans (that he’s willing to share!) - marcus crumb<33 backgroud bestieee

It’s too worth it, when she says it like that and slaps your cheek - it would add like 10 years to my life for sure

You switch it for a spiced coffee when he’s not looking. He’s silently very thankful. - chip really is that girl we knew she was

supreme favouritism - which carmy later gets<3

“It’s the one oat milk latte I made.” - oat milk!!!

then darts looks over her shoulder like she’s making an under the table deal - i love them and their schemes so much

Fak running by you to steal a coffee off your tray. - he’s so funny aidjeiri

“Collector’s item...” You nod / “That’s what I fuckin’ said!” - don’t think i forgot about this. i actually have not moved on from this moment

You pivot your shoulder for him to throw it over, hands too busy. / He throws it over your shoulder. - THEY’RE SO!!!!!

“Oh, fuck, missed your twists, Chip.” - he’s so💓💖🫶🏼💕

“Fuckin’ terrible, Carm.” - the way mikey would say this oh OH

Why it shot water straight at my tits— Close your eyes - i know he looked away but like 😁😁😁

removing your walls have completely shattered his. - yo this is so cute??

we must remember, I love Syd. - we must remember that is her gf

“You can’t take yourself?” “Bitch?” - LMFAOOO

“Like… an hour?” “It had been 23 minutes.” - Lakskfkfirorikr remember when we had ALL the comedy

“You’re doing a good job, Carmy.” - 🥹🥹🥹 i miss them so much

You’re considering a career in stand up exclusively for him because it feels like such a reward to hear it. - *evaporates*

“I’d say yeah, probably not ready for a relationship” - he is with the right person (please please please)

oh! i almost forgot but what is chip’s coffee order? i was thinking it seems plain based on the writing (her offering to swap if he didn’t like her fancier take) but i could also see her fucking with some syrups

“I know you’re a Michelin star fuckin’ big deal but like, me personally, I can’t name a thing I got perfect the first time I did it.” - i see how similar she and mikey is now, i really do. carmy you’re in love with your brother - well a mix of your brother and yourself

The Berf shall prevail. - aSJHDHEBSBA ONION

For a Bear, she sure knows how to poke one. - YOUR WRITING!!! mwah mwah mwah

“There’s something about a handywoman that Fak cannot match.” - real

She chuckles, slightly. There is something about you that feels familiar. - *clutches chest*

reading the old chapters now is so!!! like knowing the back story and how certain things are panning out (at least for now) just makes it even more enjoyable to read and to catch all your lil hints. you smartass.

Had to answer one last thing before bed (GUESS WHO DIDN’T FINISH THE DRAFT FUCK!!! But I’m like,,, like closing in,, i think,,, I do hate this last scene so far I think I have to barf out all the nonsense and pull back. Pray for me)

You think you would love to read my drafts but if you did you would find— Well actually, here, here’s a list of just some of the edits/beats I wrote for Something to Do. 

Should I be sharing my behind the scenes secrets? Probably not but eh it’s fine. Something to Do had I think the most edits out of any chapter. NONE OF THAT MATTERS THOUGH BABY WE’RE TALKING ABOUT CHAPTER 2 I JUST WANTED TO MAKE YOU AWARE THAT MY DRAFTS ARE,, , BAD. 

Anyways. The circles are fucking CIRCLING. I love(d) injecting world moments like that that weren’t all that relevant in the moment but LATER you’re like OH YEAAHHH THAT THING FROM EARLIER!! Chekov’s table carving. 

100% I’m describing a set, I honestly did just assume every career is like working on a set— You all not in film also wanna die at your jobs but if you weren’t you’d explode, right? Right? I made the right career choice? Right? 

Also NEW NICKNAMES— I don’t love Onion but it seems it has been chosen. And I must live with my fate. Could do Caramel? No one’s gonna do caramel. On my main I am salt, so you could do Salt but I do not imagine this will catch on. 

She’s a fucking LIAR!!! This I think was the one full lie I ever let Tony tell. Everything else is pretty much true or of omission but this one yes, she just stopped fuckin’ payin it. Dad’s a business man!! Of course he wouldn’t just cut the cord— You liar pants Tony!!!

100% canon every time the camera cuts on squidink you can assume they kissed in between scenes. Canon i said it!!

This chapter is so telling to re-read, because you can really tell how disjointed Chip feels, without Mikey here— To me, at least. Like, the friendship she has/had with Richie is so barely present with him in this chapter— And she THINKS they’re not close!!! Bitch!!! It’s been you two the whole time!!! I love seeing how much this changed, by Ad Interim. Our baby got her groove back. And you can see it w/ Tina too! I love my mother…. Boots the house…. She’s so very good at seeing people now, I love HER!!!

BABYBOY TIME!!! Cutest interaction in the whole series you say?? Yeah that’s probably true. I was gonna say I gotta try to one up myself but to be fair there’s something about introductions that can’t be matched. Alas. Perchance (you can’t just say—).

100% this was Tony being the guy per usual but I also think like, she’s real special cause she knows Carmen pretty well through word of mouth— To her they are kinda like old friends. And I think that’s also what contributes so well to her COMPLETELY DISARMING HIS ASS as he gets to know her back lmao.

That plate was so fucking close to being frisbee’d— It was gonna be this whole tragic mirroring scene to a scene I had considered with Mikey but pivoted because it just ,,,, did not hit. That plate sure would’ve hit the fuckin wall though yesssiirrrr— (I have much to say about the You’re Nothing, but I will get into that in a later ask down the line I SWEAR THERE’S A WHOLE THING!!)

Anyways, favourite barista !!! I love that Chip has essentially learned every trade by wanting to impress someone. Her dad, Syd, Mikey. She’s so people pleaser. Number 1 people pleaser, my beloved. And then she makes Carmen arguably one of the best coffees!!  Immediately trying to impress him after 2 fucking seconds. She’s so fucking dumb. I love her. She is me and I am her. 

I would actually love to hear ad nauseam why The Berf shirt is so unforgettable. Actually no I get it. It’s them. This whole moment is just very them. You can see their friendship start to finally peek out and it’s a real joy. 

“Fuckin’ terrible, Carm.” - the way mikey would say this oh OH

AND THE CROWD HISSES IN PAIN!!!! Yessir, yessirrrrrrrr— She is SO THE GUY SHE IS SO MIKEY!!! THE FRUITS OF MY LABOUR!!

We’ll come back to this sweetness and comedy eventually. Maybeee. We got some in Something to Do— they’ll be FINE!!

Now Chip’s coffee order— This honestly went unwritten for so long for a couple reasons. 1 - I rarely drink coffee so I suck at having opinions. 2 - Tony is really just an OC at this point but it is still technically insert, so like, whatever YOUR coffee is, is her’s.

But like… now? Between u and me? And the 3 other people that will actually bother to read this ask? I think she’d do a cortado. Half steamed milk, Half espresso. It’s simple so it’s very switchable but I think still very her, yknow?

100% She is just a blend of Mikey and Carmen. HEY HALF MILK HALF ESPRESSO!!!! LETS GO!!! IT’S A METAPHOR NOW FUCK YEAH!!! Now is she a blend of them because I deeply relate to both brothers and really just fuckin stuck my whole self into Tony? …. .i decline to speak at this time

THE BERF!! SHALL!! PREVAIL!!! I need to buy a Berf shirt. Maybe I will use my ko-fi money (i love u) to buy a Berf shirt. Collector’s item. 

The whole Nat scene is SUCH A TOUGH READ AFTER TWO STEPS BACK HONESTLY,,, THEY BOTH HANDLE GRIEF IN SUCH DIFFERENT WAYS AND IT’S SUHKFJSFKH FUCK!!! And Natalie just seeing Mikey in her, like fucking everyone does— It’s just so— I’m fuckin DYING!!

Also. I’m so glad tumblr blurs ask photos because I remembered looking at these and then I forgot what they were and then i got to look with fresh eyes again and have a giggle all over again. THE MIRRORJEG— (processing an emotion)I’ll include these in a comp eventually, but here are some from my collection. Meme exchange, only fair.

I LOVE YOU AS ALWAYS KISS KISS I AM NOT GONNA GET TO SHOWER TONIGHT I’M GONNA HAVE TO GO TO WORK WITH AN OILY SCALP AND IT’S YOUR (my) FAULT!!

[bookishtheaterlover7]

WOO! Had to go through high or hell water, but a blessing in the form of the mysterious new friend 🎄 helped me get the info I need

Now... Let's drag this pretentious bitch through the mud again, shall we..?

For starters, let's admire the "bride"😜

Well, well... They actually made the Wicked Witch of the East (West is Elphaba, I will not drag her with this bitch) look good. Even 👸 said she actually liked the lipstick and wearing a good outfit, covering what everyone has already seen too much of, and choosing black, to mourn her lost Instagram followers? 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

And what is with that position?! She also hates the little bow on the dress, it's indicative of Albitch's Lolita personality (in my words, AS IF THE BITCH NEEDED TO REMIND EVERYONE). And those cold black eyes 😆 What is with the bow below? Most people would have the bow at the waist! (I told her that Albitch doesn't have curves to accentuate 🙃)

👸 is being a savage today and I'm loving it!!!

Honestly, she's right, as always 😆 and the thing with Albitch's stupid ass position it kinda reminds me of Cinderella's step sisters 🤭

And she actually wears something other than crop tops?!😵 And really? A babydoll dress? Could you be anymore obvious, Albitch?!

And one last thing... FUCKING FIX YOUR POSITIONS, YOU WANNABE!!!

Onto the topic of Chris...

Their rings don't fucking match! What married couple doesn't have matching rings?! This isn't the 1800s where only the bride wears the ring. Both husband and wife, are supposed to have a ring. They might not wear it all the time, but they do have rings! But these two? You put their photos right next to each other, and it looks like someone told them to each buy a ring without knowing what the other even looked like 🤭☕

His is some form of gold. Still doesn't fit... And hers, are silver, dull and fucking loose!!!

Sidebar~

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by alba updates (@albaupdates)

Thank you 👸 for showing me this vid, I needed that laugh 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Albitch, do you seriously don't know what to do with your hands? With all your slutty posts, I thought you'd be an expert by now 🤭 I guess that's why you never show them in pictures you post...

And another thing. This goes to all of the people who thought she's hiding because she's pregnant...

DOES SHE LOOK REMOTELY PREGNANT TO YOU?! YOU'RE FUCKING DELULU!!!

And we're back to Chris...

Yeah those wedding rings are seriously not matching. And no matter how you spin it, there's absolutely zero reason for those two to not match. Unless neither knew what the other bought in which case...

THEY'RE EXPOSING THEMSELVES!!!!

Just like how Albitch appearing without Chris only confirms our suspicions, that he's in MA, with his family, DEFINITELY WITHOUT HIS LOVING NEW BRIDE 😁

Now, isn't that just couple goals... 🙄

I mean Dodger will actually have a happy Thanksgiving this year, because his Daddy would actually smell nice and not have his wicked Step-Mother

Oh, I forgot! 👸 rewatched Chris' NYCC panel, and at 10:14 of the video...

She told me, it's really hard to notice, and I didn't but after two tries I did too, that Chris mentions that he has to use treats to get Dodger to come near him, because, "sometimes stuff happens"...

I'm sorry, but WHAT STUFF HAPPENED THAT MAKES DODGER NOT WANT TO BE NEAR YOU, CHRISTOPHER?!

I know it sounds like a stretch, and probably a major conspiracy theory. But come on! Dodger is the least shy dog on the internet! He loves new friends, in dog and human form.

And he's a dog who, like his Dad, loves to show affection, and receive it. There's no way, Dodger would avoid people, unless, and my dog is like this, they've had a bad experience with that person, and they don't trust them. Even just the scent might have them stay away. 🤔🧐

TL;DR

🎄 is an angel sent from the heavens to have helped me. 👸 is SAVAGE today with the sick burns. Albitch looks decent, but her positions, and the fact that literally EVERYTHING but the ring shines is another Red Flag 🚩(we're about to run out of room for these flags). Chris and her have rings that don't fucking match. Dodger might be having a happy Thanksgiving because his wicked Step-Mother is as far from MA as she can be (Green card, what? She doesn't know her🤭)

Oh, and...

Happy Thanksgiving to those that celebrate it 😁🍗

[ad-hawkeye]

posing you a potentially difficult task:rate artem’s year three worst to best(when you get the time ofc)

anon this was difficult on my soul. but i did it. mostly. because there's one or two i haven't watched in full myself, and one of those i legit have heard nothing about in terms of quality, i will mark them with a star.

i will also be including some of the upcoming third year cards i've read the translations of.

with that disclaimer out of the way, here's my list! worst from best.

ocean’s enchantment [summer splash] - i have no clue how they made a card that i consider worse than artem's second anniversary card but. by god did they do it. never say anything is impossible. at least artem was dressed nice in his second anniversary card. and also shitfaced. literally nothing is in this card's favor. also artem knowing how to surf is mind numbingly stupid i'll say it. lavish invitation [second anniversary] - i've bitched and moaned about this card for nearly two years now. you all know the takes on this one. third anniversary - this one nearly put me to sleep! 2/10. despite some weird short lived ooc moments, not as bad as artem's second anniversary card. its main sin is being a chore to get through. i was fighting against the urge to skip forward. mediocre art. top up cello ssr - ugh. i got so annoyed by this one i stopped watching a few minutes before the end. it's yet another "omg no way artem is a master at this random ass hobby?!?!?!?!??" card that year three LOVES and the explanation for it is so convoluted. really pretty art though. always happy to see rosa's canonical violin skills mentioned. calm as the night [billiards] - this one was fine. i guess? first of the cards i don't actively dislike. epic highs (omg this part made me smile like a year one/two card!) and epic lows (why are they licking each other's arms) velocity of desire [racing]* - i'd rank this one equal to artem's billiards card. one of the ssrs i mentioned that i haven't actually read, but i've seen people have generally indifferent to positive commentary on. better handling of jealousy. the actual event this came with was super cute though. love for the ages [3rd birthday] - cute art, serviceable if not a teensy bit convoluted story. an enjoyable time. this ranking is NOT about the birthday event it came with which, imo, sucked major ass. enshrouded sunglow - to the surprise of no one the au cards are going to wind up topping this list. funny enough i think this is artem's weakest au card. it's afraid to take risks and was a bit more boring than the other aus. still ages better than most of year three though. cutie ollie - mind boggling how this card where artem "isn't used to this kind of physical touch" in regards to mc playing with his hair, comes AFTER the daddy dom sex god ssr. anyways this one is very cute. i'm convinced it was supposed to be a year two card bc the only mention of second anniversary is a quick mention of an engagement ring. lmao. stormy enigma [bakerlon] - bakerlon my beloved. save me bakerlon save me. one of artem's better au cards, but i still wouldn't rank it first. also celestine is in it! a win! belle nuit d'amour - further evidence to my claim that tot's personal story cards rarely if ever suck. some good character stuff, the closest we've seen to artem fucking up a case, really good art. would recommend. or maybe not idk i haven't actually read the global version but i can't imagine it's too different from the fan translation i read. dragonsbreath - this one ties with the weeds for my favorite artem au card story. neil is in this one. fun plot. good art. good characterization.

[UNRANKED] voice of comfort* - i have not read this one nor have i ever seen anyone talk about it like. ever. or maybe i did read it and just fucking forgot. idk. don't really have the energy to read it regardless. the art is kinda mid. if anyone wants to message me their thoughts on this one, i can tentatively adjust my ranking on it

*i have not personally read either of these. any ratings are done via word of mouth or summary. regard these ratings tentatively.

[blodgmonster]

Part 3 of my EoS ToD tandem reread commentary. Getting to the end of both books so it should be less of a slog now.

-- Yrene pushing Hasar into the pool. Priceless.

-- "I loved you before I ever set eyes on you." SARTAQ!!!!! God, men written by women are just so much better than the real thing.

"' We wait for the Queen of the Valg,' the spider purred, rubbing against the carving. 'Who in this world calls herself Maeve." The fucking SHOCK when I read that the first time. God damn.

-- "' You once asked me where I stand on the line between killing to protect and killing for pleasure.' His fingers grazed the seam of the scar across her abdomen. 'I'll stand on the other side of that line when I find your grandmother.'" DORIAN!!!! FUCK YEAH!

-- Gah, I'm getting confused on what chapters from which book I'm supposed to be reading in which order. And I'm like 85% of the way through both of them.

-- I was right. The Eye is the Lock

-- Hey, Nehemia....

-- It's so funny that all this time Elena has been portrayed as wise and serene. And then we find out she was reckless and short sighted and stupid.

-- "Everything he had done, Aelin had come to rip it apart. Starting with his honor." You did that all by yourself, Chaol. God, get OVER it, you Criston Cole ass bitch.

-- "He only looked toward the dark and smiled. Not broken. Made anew. And when the darkness beheld him...Chaol slid a hand against its cheek. Kissed its brow. It loosened its grip and tumbled back into that pit. Curled up on that rocky floor and quietly, carefully, watched him." What a lovely metaphor.

-- Hell yeah, House Whitethorn

-- Last 100 pages of EoS. Here we fucking go.

-- ABRAXOS AND THE THIRTEEN ARRIVING IN THE NICK OF TIME!!

-- LORCAN, YOU DUMB FUCK

-- "I'll go with you, I'll come with you" ELIDE, YOU BEAUTIFUL SOUL.

-- Aelin being whipped.

-- "Where is my wife?"

-- AEDION, SHUT THE FUCK UP

-- *heavy sigh * That's Eos done. Time to finish ToD.

-- having the Valg be Duva is a fantastic little twist. Sweet, mostly ignored preggo lady.

-- I wonder...will the baby be born fucked up? The Valg was infesting its mother the whole time it was developing in utereo. Will it have been affected?

-- Aelin's self-defense lessons coming through to save Yrene.

-- I think the scar Aelin gave Chaol should have stayed. Maybe that's mean of me but...

-- "I am as much of a man in that chair, or with that cane, as I am standing on my feet." Alright! Chuck that ableism out the window!

-- Oh, shitballs. I forgot that Yrene and Chaol's lives are now tied to each other so that if one dies they both die. Just like Feyre and Rhysand. SJM must think this is suuuuuper romantic. I think otherwise. A suttee is not romantic. Leaving your potential children to deal with suddenly becoming an orphan is not romantic. Leaving your loved ones to mourn not just one but both of you is not romantic.

-- Sometimes she makes it seem like Yrene actually goes INSIDE Chaol or Duva when she's healing them. That can't be right. It's her like...power going inside and fighting what's inside, right? Homegirl does not Magic School Bus her way into the human body. Right?

-- so the fetus is healthy and human. BUT will it be a sociopath or an asshole?

-- Poor Duva. Get her some therapy.

-- I'm so glad Nesryn claimed a ruk

-- Nesryn got a MASSIVE upgrade with Sartaq. And not just because he's the heir to the khaganate. Because he wonderful.

-- SJM like...never writes weddings. They always just get married in some secret ceremony off camera. Very weird.

-- "A gift from a queen who had seen another woman in hell and thought to reach back a hand. With no thought of it ever being returned. A moment of kindness, a tug on a thread..." I hope you feel kind of shitty about all the mean things you said about Aelin, Chaol. She saved your wife.

-- Fireheart. Locked away in the dark.

Well. I don't think I'll do the tandem reread again. But it certainly was a cool experience. A slog, but cool. Onto KoA, destroyer of my heart.

[androgynousblackbox]

Sometimes I feel like the only person who loves seeing media critiquing capitalism, talking about class, and just don't like at all the Menu. Like, I saw a video of someone saying that the movie is really about violence and how "if you want a violent revolution, then you are just as bad as the people who want to exterminate you", and I also don't vibe that, but also I don't really buy into the whole "oh, this movie is about destroying the elite and literally eating the rich", like.... I can see parts of that, but more than anything is... meh. I still think it's kinda weak even after seeing reaction and review videos from people who do actually work on that industry, who understood the little nuances behind the dishes and what not. I guess my biggest issue is the main guy. Like, he makes this huge fucking deal about how he has come to hate everything he does, about how he wants to punish the people who don't appreciate his work, who are so filthy rich that take it for granted, and I am here like but, my guy, you are part of this industry too. You made it so the people who work with you in this bullshit island idea have no life outside of this. You created this shit. Nobody forced you into doing this. You made this hell. You put yourself on it. Why should I root for you to take it out on people who did nothing to you? Taking it back to that "this movie is about violence on both side of social conflict", fuck that shit because oppressed people did fuck all to be on that position. They didn't choose to live that life and they did nothing to deserve it. This guy literally couldn't have done anything to reach that place that wasn't his own will. So I am fucking ass confused as to WHY people are taking this movie as some kind of "fuck you" to the elite class, when the "fuck you" comes from a part of the elite that prefers to do anything before going to therapy? Like the first death is an angel investor and like, sincerely, just why is this guy being punished for giving you the money for this stupid bullshit you wanted to make? I just never get a sense that either he or the movie is aknowledging this? Like, what, I am supposed to feel bad because making a simple cheeseburger is fulfilling for him and he forgot that while he was making those fancy ass dishes? Why was just giving up this island bullshit and getting your own restaurant with cheesburgers not an option here? "Uh but then we wouldn't have the movie" doesn't cut it for me. Why are we treating this like a tragedy that just happened to this guy, and that is why he has a right to lash out, instead of just his own fucking choices? And like, if you tell me "my guy, this is just a horror movie. It's supposed to be unhinged. If every serial killer went to therapy instead of doing unhinged evil things we won't have a genre anymore" and like, fine, sure, but then why are people treating it like it's something bigger than that? Why I see so many people being on the side of this guy or even rooting for him? I don't get it, I truly don't.

Like, when he starts monologuing about why everyone is going to die and he just shit in John Leguizamo because he did a bad movie that he went to see on his one free day, I am just like bitch, you are your own boss. You did that to yourself. And you can watch more than one movie in a day? He didn't want that role either, the fuck are you on about. Maybe that is just part of the comedy, it's supposed to be just one joke about how truly petty and nonsensical this bullshit has turned into, which like good, fun, but then that really clashes with that being on his side. I don't want to be on the side of a guy who shits on actors for just doing their job with bad scripts they didn't write. It's confusing to me seeing people saying "this movie is a true criticism of class while something like Saltburn is not" and maybe that is the thing about art, that everyone is supposed to have different interpretations and tastes and whatever, but I feel like a fucking alien seeing this kind of discourse pop out because I just fundamentally disagree with it. I don't even know if it's a me thing that I don't understand or it's a gringo thing somehow? I don't know, it's weird.

[mermaidsirennikita]

i forgot how hilarious the lothaire not being able to lie thing is. tbh that whole book is SO funny and has no right to be considering everything else that goes on but it absolutely works lmao

More people need to read that motherfucking book. Like. It sounds dark. And... it is. But it's soooo funny. I don't think people realize that his entire inner monologue is CRAZY. He's like "shit, I am so FUCKING HOT and all I want to do is RULE THE WORLD and why won't people JUST LET ME and I'm supposed to marry this evil vampire goddess who's kind of a bitch and I don't think she'd be a good mom????? But it's gotta be her, it can't be this HILLYBILLY who I just want to be around allll the time, and who gets me, and who honestly blows my mind every time we have sex, i WILL NOT BE WITH A WOMAN WHO EATS FUNYUNS!!!1"

And I can't imagine the pressure Kresley was under to write that novel lol. She hyped him up for so long. He had a third POV in the previous book. Her publisher sent her on like, a bus tour to promote it lmao. And she nailed it.

He's into PUZZLES???? He finishes a puzzle and smiles evilly because he and Ellie finally fucked and he cleared his brain and can do his weird-ass puzzles again??? He sees Ellie tanning and like, teleports back to his penthouse to get sunglasses so that he can perv on her safely???

And Ellie is hilarious too. Sending him her middle finger, which he then carries around in his pocket for the rest of the fucking series, a thing she finds ridiculously romantic for some reason. Telling a 3,000 year old vampire he's "loaded for bear" because he has a massive dick (and because they are soulmates, he's like "HOT"). Being so angry at him she literally wants to kill him after he does The Thing but still feeling so horny that she's like "FINE LET'S 69 FIRST".

Never mind the very rational Dacians showing up to end this 3,000 year long struggle Lothaire has had to claim his rightful throne by going "well.... look. None of us are happy about this, but you're the only option left, so I guess you're king now". I. Wheeze.