#which i thought was so fun. babe what would james think about you letting innocent people blow up. james haunt his ass.

[vonlipvig]

if i was making scandal s4 i'd have a psychological horror cyrus subplot where he's periodically haunted by a rotting, zombie-fied ghost version of james every time he continues to support the administration in his usual immoral ways, both serving as a representation of his guilt over his loss, and the constant reinforcing of his sunk-cost fallacy way of coping. but because this wasn't relevant to olivia's journey they didn't include it.

[donutloverxo]

First night

This is for nastybuckybarnes' au challenge. I hope you like it babe.

Run through - You're nervous to consummate your marriage with your new husband.

Warnings - medieval au, smut, heavy dub con, innocent/inexpericened reader, loss of virginity, light breeding kink. Read responsibly.

Pairing - King!Steve Rogers x reader

Word count - almost 3k

Masterlist is linked in the bio!

You bit your lip getting up from the bed, thinking of maybe pacing around the chambers to help your restlessness. You looked at the pot of red wine right next to the fruit basket. You could have one, that would help with your nerves. But you were afraid you wouldn’t handle the alcohol well and make a fool of yourself in front of the king.

You looked at the crisp white cloth laid on the bed. Maybe you should lay down? That’s what your mother had told you.

“Just lay down and let your king do the job. Don’t move for a while after it’s done, or you won’t be able to conceive. If it hurts too much just think of something else”

Her words didn’t make things easier for you. But then you had heard good things about it from your friends. You really didn’t know what to believe. You hoped that you would meet a boy, fall in love and get married. Perhaps knowing a person helps with the coupling? Not that you need to know Steven anymore than you already do. He is your husband now. He could do whatever he wants with you.

When you were told you were to be married to him. You were as scared as you were happy. You didn’t know the first thing about marriage or men. But you had heard of king Stevens bravery and kindness, along with tales of his ethereal beauty. They said that he was carved out by gods themselves. You fell in love as soon as you saw his portrait. His rugged jaw covered with a thick beard, his long locks sweeped back, his broad shoulders and alert stance, akin to that of a soilder.

You couldn’t believe you were to be the queen. Being the youngest of three sisters you would never have had such an opportunity. But both your older sisters were married off. One to a prestigious Lord and another to a king of a small kingdom. You did feel a tinge of pride when they were so jealous of you. Of the power you were to have as a queen and of your beautiful and brave future husband.

Power. Something that scared you the most. Sure being a queen was glamourous. But what if you let your new kingdom and people down. What if you let your king down?

You had never met him before the wedding. When your face was unveiled, and you looked at his face and him up close you were taken aback. Of just how much more handsome he looked in reality. That portrait did him no justice.

You couldn’t tell if he found you satisfactory at all. His face was set in an unreadable expression. Was he pleased or disappointed with you? He barely spoke two words to you the entire ceremony and feast. You cringed as you recalled your first dance. How even after so many lessons you kept stepping on his feet, while he kept moving gracefully. You imagined him moving with the same grace on the battlefield.

You wanted to please him. To be enough for him. You knew men seeked pleasure from other women if they found their wives unsatisfactory. You didn’t think you could stand it if he did something like that. In a moment of desperation you asked your newly assigned handmaiden for some help on how to please a man. She, of course was embarrassed and refused to give you a clear answer. They would probably gossip about you now. No. You can’t think about that. Not right now.

You straightened your back to sit up straight as you heard the doors being opened. You let out the breathe you didn’t even know you were holding as you looked at him. With his white shirt, which gave you a generous view of his chest and the thin hair splattered over it and his dark pants, he looked much different without his informal attire. He stared you down but didn’t really acknowledged your presence as he made his way over to the wine.

Before he could pour a glass you quickly made your way over to him, fetching the glass from the table. “Allow me, my king” you gave him a nervous smile. It was probably a bad idea since you couldn’t stop your hands from shaking. You cringed as you splashed a few drops out of the glass.

He only shook his head making a sound of disapproval, grabbing the pot from you he poured the glass full handing it to you. “You might need it more than me”

“Oh well... thank you...” You took it from him. Too scared to refuse him. To tell him you absolutely hated the foul taste of wine. You tried your best to keep a straight face as you swallowed the liquid. You chugged the glass down setting it on the table. You could feel it taking effect in your limbs as you felt your whole body loosen up.

“Have you been with other men before?” he asked walking over to the bed.

You were floored by his question. They had sent a doctor to make sure you had never been touched before. Which you weren’t. He knew the answer. But then why was he asking. “I won’t dignify that with an answer” You huffed. He was getting some kind of sick pleasure from your humiliation. You wouldn’t have him make fun of you.

“Oh?” He smirked in amusement at your boldness. He felt his cock stir in his pants at your defiance. A stark contrast to what he perceived you as.

He never really cared much for marriage. Always thinking that he would find the right woman along the way. Sure he indulged in some courtesans here and there but he held back. Not wanting any bastard children. He knew how doomed their fate was just like his half brother James.

He wished for a strong woman, capable and worthy of being a queen. But he learned that you didn’t even know how to ride a horse. You were nothing more than a spoilt sheltered princess. But he agreed to the marriage, for his kingdom and his duty.

He could make it work. As long as you give him a few sons the marriage wouldn’t be an utter failure. He could learn to bear you or even care for you a bit.

But then he looked at you face, your hair and gown all made up, you were the prettiest bride he had ever seen. His bride. He couldn’t help but be proud you were going to be his.

And now that he could see you and your plump figure through the thin petticoat, he couldn’t wait to tear it off and to find out if you were just as curvy underneath. “Come here” He smirked as you instantly followed standing in front of him, your fingers fidgeting with your gown. “Have you ever kissed anyone before?” he knew you hadn’t. But he needed to hear it from you. He would be proud to be your first in everything.

You shook your head staring at the floor. You looked so small and helpless in front of him. It was a dilemma. Because it made him protective of you but at the same time want to do devious things to you. He thought about how he could take you. Of course he’d get to have you every way and anyway he wanted, you were his wife and his future queen, but he needed the first time to be memorable. “What was that?”

“No. I haven’t, your grace” You spat almost spitefully.

He chuckled at that, staring at your lips, he bent down to capture them and have a taste. He felt you go stiff when his lips touched yours, as soft as rose petals and oh so sweet. You gasped into his mouth as he pulled you into him by pulling at your waist. He threw you on the bed, over the white sheet.

You stayed there panting, your kiss swollen lips, your nipples that turned into stiff peaks he groaned just at the sight of them. You were looking at him as if you were afraid of him, maybe you should be. He climbed onto the bed and settled between your legs. He pushed the helm of your petticoat up until it revealed your smooth soft legs and thick thighs to him.

“Oh! Wha –“ you stammered as he nipped at the inside of your thigh, slowing moving towards your core. He could smell your arousal. He couldn’t wait to dig his face in it and taste it. Find out if it was as sweet as you were. He wasn’t a patient man but for now he would wait. You were a fine woman. One who should be enjoyed at the fullest. So he would take his time, even if his cock was aching to be inside you.

He was trying to get the gown off of you with no help from you it was turning out to be quite a task. Fuck it to being patient. He tore the collar of your gown, ripping the whole thing off. He quickly threw the shred of cloth away and tossed it away.

He stared you down. You were sniffling as tears of shame escaped your eyes, your hands pathetically trying to cover your chest. You made yourself small trying to curl in on yourself ,but with him sitting between your legs, didn’t leave you much room to move.

He took your wrists in his hands pushing them down besides your head and he bend down to lick the salty tear off your cheek. He pressed a small kiss to your cheek before squeezing your wrists. “Keep them here. I’m your husband, you don’t hide from me” He stated as he pulled back up to admire your nude body. You gulped down as you moved your head so you wouldn’t have to look at him, but you didn’t dare move your hands or cover yourself.

He pressed a thumb over your hard nipple pulling on the nub as you gasped and tried so hard to contain those your moans, but he heard them. He licked the peak before sucking it into his mouth placing soft kisses over your breasts as you kept whining and shivering under him.

He kissed down your stomach finally looking at your heat between your legs. He had never been as awestruck as he was in that moment. He took in a deep breathe to get a whiff of your arousal.

“My king?” you hesitated sitting up on your elbows looking down at him between your legs “ what are you doing?” you panicked. Surely he wouldn’t.... “Oh!” You cried out loud as you felt him lick a stripe up your folds. You sat up pushing at his head “This isn’t how it’s done” you tried to argue. Although you weren’t sure, no one told you about this. What was he even doing?

You fell back on the mattress as he pushed his palm down on your chest “Stay” He commanded. You had no choice but to lay back. You stared at the rose garlands painted on the ceiling, trying to distract yourself, as he licked and sucked at you. You really did try to hold in the noises your body was so desperate to let out. But you couldn’t not when you were feeling so strange yet so good.

You whimpered as he wrapped his mouth around your bundle of nerves sucking it into his mouth and swirling his tongue over it. Maybe he was doing it to make you feel good but it felt more like a sweet torture. You felt as if you were on the edge of something about to crash and burn. But then, your world came to a screeching halt as you felt him push a finger into your channel. You clenched around the alien object, the invasion felt so strange you didn’t know what to make of it.

“Fuck you’re tight” you would’ve been upset at his foul language and his use of the forbidden word but what he was doing was much more sinful than that. You couldn’t think of anything but his mouth and his tongue on you, his finger inside you. You moaned as he pushed another finger inside you pulling them out only to quickly push them back in. “Don’t know how I will last” He groaned curling his long digits inside you as you screamed at the top of your longs.

It was as if everything came crashing down on you. The feeling was incomparable. Unlike anything you had ever felt before. Your skin was on fire as your muscles spasmed.

You could vaguely hear him undress as you looked at him through your hooded eyes. His pupils blown wide, his cock standing up straight against his hard stomach. You could see the faint scars littered across his body, proof of his many battles.

You were expecting him to do the deed, make love to you and truly make you his wife. But he pulled you up to sit on your bum, your eyes staring straight at his cock. “You gonna return the favor princess?” He asked his voice was much deeper and his tone more gruff. “Taste it” He said pushing the head of his cock against your lips.

You weren’t quite sure what you were supposed to do. So you simply opened your mouth as he pushed himself in. You gagged as he hit the back of your throat, your spit dripping down your chin. He tasted salty and musky. You felt as if you’d cry again, of being naked and in such a compromising position. All the while he was so composed and graceful.

He held onto your face pulling his cock out of your mouth but before you could breathe out in relief he slammed back in again. You couldn’t fit all of him, he was too big. He thrusted a few times before pulling out of your mouth completely. You coughed and gasped for air, cleaning up his spend and your spit with the back of your hand.

“Can’t cum in your mouth” He groaned pushing you to lay down he hovered above you. You felt him rub his tip against your folds.

“Wh – what if it doesn’t fit?” you asked nervous again. You had never seen a naked man before, but he looked big. At least right now, he was looking at your face instead of your naked body.

“Just loosen up” You followed his advice as you held onto his thick arms. You winced in pain as you felt the pinch of him entering your weeping channel. You moved your head away biting your lip to contain your screams.

“Look at me” he demanded grabbing your chin “look at your king” You reluctantly opened your eyes staring at him. He was so beautiful. You couldn’t help but run your fingers through his thick beard, just a shade darker than his golden blonde hair. You wailed throwing your head back as he pushed into you completely seething himself.

“Shh” he hushed you as he snaked a hand between your bodies striking your clit to distract you. “It’ll feel better soon” He promised. As he let you get accustomed to his length. The fact that he was much larger than most men and that you were a virgin wasn’t lost on him. He would have to restrain himself. Which seemed impossible at the moment. Your walls so snug and tight, clenching around him, he would cum right this second.

He pulled out of you before slowly pushing himself back in. He set a steady pace as your cries slowly turned into moans. You clawed at his back, your legs instinctively wrapping around his waist. He was only spurred on by your little mewls and hot puffs of air against his ear.

You cried out again thrashing and squirming under him another wave of pleasure crashing into you. He grunts as he felt you clench around him, milking him for all he’s worth. He snapped his hips against yours a couple of times cuming deep in your womb.

He laid on top of you, catching his breathe. He pulled the white sheet from under you and used it to clean you between your legs. You jerked as the cloth touched your sensitive skin. He cleaned his cock and went outside his chambers to hang the sheets up.

When he returned you were about to get up and put on whatever you could salvage out of your torn nightgown. “Lay back down” He demanded fed up “you have to give me a son” he reminded you pushing you into the mattress. Just how many times would he have to tell you before you would understand. He’ll have to work on a way to make you listen. That’s alright though, he had all the time in the world.

Tags will be in the reblog! If you wanna join the taglist lemme know or click on the link in the bio. divider by @writeyourmindaway

Ima go soak in holy water for like ten hours to wash off these sins🥵🥵 this is as dark as I'm gonna go lol. Who knows maybe there will be a part two 👀

[kissinginkitchens]

You Bring Me Home—Chapter Eight: Don’t Worry Baby

a/n: hello hello!!! a massive apology for this one being so late it’s been such a hectic week for me, so I really appreciate your patience <3 Thank you for sticking around and for the continued love and support you have shown to this story. It really means the world to me :’) I hope you enjoy this chapter, feel free to chat with me afterwards, I’m intrigued to see where y’all think this story is going now👀 there is certainly much 2 think about... Much love, Mel <3

Pairing: Hawai’i!Harry x Original Character

Warnings: swearing

Word Count: 4.5k

catch up on parts one, two, three, four, five, six, and seven

The faint clanging of pots and pans, Freddie barking, and Pua’s laughter rouses Alani from her peaceful sleep. She sees nothing but pink as her eyes peel open and momentarily thinks that she’s gone blind, but her vision soon focuses on the vague outline of black ink. With a curious dent between her brows, she removes the sticky note pressed to her forehead and turns it over.

GOOD MORNING!

MAKING BREAKFAST DOWNSTAIRS. SEE YOU THERE :)

♡  H

Her mouth, still puffy with the touch of sleep, curls at the edges as she clutches the note to her chest. One hand slides over to the indentation left in her bed by Harry and it’s still warm, which means that he must not have been gone long. Alani climbs out of the covers and races to the top of the stairs where she can hear him and her sister having a playful exchange. 

“I don’t think you put enough chocolate chips,”

“What do you mean? It’s about 90% chocolate right now,”

“So make it 100%,”

As she creeps down the stairs, she spots Pua perched on a swiveling chair at the kitchen island, Freddie snoozing in her lap, while Harry meticulously sprinkles chocolate chips into a bowl of pancake batter next to the stove. The scene makes Alani’s heart swell, so she silently observes for a moment before interrupting. 

“Is this more to your liking, Your Majesty?”

“Much better. Even Freddie thinks so,”

“I thought dogs couldn’t have chocolate,”

“Must you question everything I say?”

“I think he’s right,” Alani confirms, stepping into the kitchen to tussle her sister’s hair and pet Freddie. Harry lights up at the sound of her voice and immediately sticks his cheek out for a kiss. She gives him a peck and accepts the chocolate chip that he holds to her lips, letting him have a taste as it dissolves on their tongues. 

“Please, don’t stop on my account,” Pua grimaces. 

The pair separate and Alani pokes her tongue out at her younger sister, making Harry chuckle beside her. 

“Hey, no fighting,” he warns. “Or no one gets pancakes.”

“She started it!” both sisters defend in unison. 

They share a laugh and dissolve into their own antics while Harry returns to the stove with a cheerful whistle. He methodically shapes the pancakes into hearts on the skillet, playfully swatting Alani’s hand away from the bag of chocolate every five minutes or so. Freddie waits patiently at Harry’s ankles during the entire cooking process, praying that the human will drop a scrap of food his way. 

“Sorry, Mr. Mercury,” Harry apologizes, reaching down to give the dog a gentle pat. “These aren’t for you. Take it up with Mother Nature,”

Alani fills Freddie’s bowl to relieve Harry of his dog-sitting duties before hopping up onto the counter beside him. He slots himself between her legs, flashing a cheesy grin that makes her giggle, and her fingertips trace over the faint shadow of stubble around his jawline and above his lip.

“Can you grow a beard?”

“Do you want me to?”

Alani shrugs, considering the idea. “I was just wondering if you were capable,”

“Hey,” he pouts. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

She smiles innocently, pinching his chin. “Nothing, I like the fresh face. But stubble’s kinda hot,”

“Noted,” Harry winks.

“I like spending my mornings with you,” Alani admits quietly. “And the whole chef thing you’ve got going on is definitely a perk,” 

Harry’s dimple resurfaces and his emerald eyes gleam. “Me too, sweets. Did you like the note I left you?”

“Yes, it was a very nice touch,” Alani confesses, heart still soaring over the sentiment. 

“Didn’t wanna wake you. Looked so peaceful drooling, hair all in your face—”

“—Hey!”

“Did you know that you kinda talk a little in your sleep?”

“I do not!” 

Harry kisses the wrinkle in the middle of her forehead and it eases. “Do too. It’s cute, though.”

“Yeah, whatever,” Alani grumbles with a small, affectionate smile. “Let’s eat.”

Both Pua and Alani compliment Harry on the restaurant quality of his heart-shaped pancakes, and he accepts the praise with a bow that makes them both giggle. The three of them gather happily around the dining table, sharing jokes and analyses of each other’s dreams from the night before. Of particular interest is Pua’s dream about her teeth being replaced by kernels of candy corn, which Harry explains is a warning to cut down on the sugar before bed. 

“You’re no fun,” Pua teases with her arms crossed. “Only had a pint of ice cream last night,”

Harry snickers. “As opposed to?”

“Alani, can you date a dairy farmer next time?” 

“Hey!”

Alani rolls her eyes, but her smile reveals her true amusement. “Be nice,”

“Thought I was your ‘favorite singer,’” Harry sulks. 

Pua’s eyes dart to her older sister. “You told him?!”

“What?” Alani asks innocently. “It was sweet,”

Harry’s brow furrows. “Why wasn’t I supposed to know that?”

“Cause you’ll get a big head,” 

“Too late. I won your sister over, even though she’s way out of my league,”

“And don’t you forget it.” Pua cautions with a friendly tussle of his hair before standing with her empty plate. 

Harry chuckles lightly. “I thought we were friends,”

“Sisters before misters,” Alani shrugs, grabbing his plate and utensils to put in a pile with her own. “So whatcha doin’ today?”

“Good question,” he ponders, tapping his chin. “Get dressed, we’re going out,”

“Where to?”

“It’s a surprise,”

“I don’t like surprises,”

“Tough,” Harry maintains. “And you’re a liar cos everyone likes good surprises,”

Alani traces a heart onto the back of his hand with her fingertip and sighs. “But I need to know what to dress for,”

“Dress for the perfect afternoon with your favorite guy,”

“James Marsden’s coming?”

Harry purses his lips and stands. “Alright, I’m leaving now,”

“I’m kidding!” Alani giggles, offering an apologetic kiss. “I’m sorry, sunshine. Please don’t go,”

“I wasn’t aware that James Marsden made you these pancakes,” Harry dodges her affection.

“Or that he had your face as his screensaver,”

“You do not!” Alani counters, eyes wide. 

She gasps when he holds up his phone to reveal her unflattering selfie. “Why?!”

“Because you’re so cute, that’s why!” Harry explains with a delicate smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. “Even when you’re mean,”

Alani playfully swats his arm and pulls him closer by the pocket of his hoodie. “I’m sorry, ku’uipo. You’re the sweetest. Thank you for breakfast.”

“Welcome, dove,” he beams. “Now grab some clothes, we gotta stop by my place first.”

********

Alani slips on a pair of platform sandals and smoothes out her skirt while Harry pulls on a white t-shirt with a blue bandana secured around his neck. The polka dots on her yellow dress bring a fond crease to the corners of his eyes as he swipes a pair of black sunglasses from his dresser and pushes them into his unruly curls for the time being. 

“Give us a twirl,” he requests, whistling when she obliges. 

Alani spins into his arms and her hands smooth over the soft material of his burnt orange button up adorned with white lilies. “Digging the white tee, babe. How very James Dean of you.”

“Only the best for you, doll.” Harry shoots back in his best American accent. 

As they make their way to the back of the house where the Cadillac is parked, he queues up a song that he hopes will bring a smile to Alani’s face. “Itsy Bitsy Teenie Weenie Yellow Polka Dot Bikini” begins playing as loud as his phone speakers will allow and he flashes a cheeky grin in her direction. “Bit of a theme song for you today,”

“You’re such a cheese ball,”

“Don’t act like you don’t love it,” he teases with a pinch of her thigh. 

“Never said I didn’t,”

“Fair enough,” 

“So, are you finally gonna tell me where we’re going now?” Alani asks, batting her eyelashes. 

Harry shakes his head and tuts in mock disapproval. “Are you gonna try to ruin every surprise I plan for you?”

“I just wanna know what to expect!”

“You’ll like it, promise,”

“A hint?” she bargains. “An itsy bitsy, teenie weenie one?”

Harry captures his bottom lip between his teeth and thinks. “It’s for something in your room,”

“That’s all?” Alani blurts. “That could mean anything!”

“You said one hint and I delivered! So why don’t you just sit back and enjoy the ride now?” he suggests, laughing to himself when Alani crosses her arms with a huff. 

The drive is scenic and the weather is especially nice, which explains why the beaches they pass are more crowded than usual. Alani checks “beach” off her list of possible locations, racking her brain for the items in her room that could have possibly caught Harry’s attention. She wonders if he noticed the various scented candles perched on her nightstand and dressing table, deciding that a candle shop probably isn’t likely. Momentarily, she recalls the pile of books on her desk and her mind flashes back to their conversation about one of their mutual favorite authors, Angela Avery. Getting warmer. Harry remains tight-lipped and merely offers a coy smile or a whistle each time Alani ventures a guess. But just when she started to believe she would wear him down, the two of them pull into the parking lot of Moku Records and draw her speculation to an end. 

“Of course,” Alani surrenders, stepping out of the passenger door that Harry opens for her. “I should’ve known,”

“Came here my first week. The day after I met you, actually,” he explains bashfully.

Alani’s cheeks warm at the sentiment, and she laughs at the way he swings their joint hands softly as they cross the empty parking lot. Harry pulls the door open and she takes a curious step over the threshold, noting the hint of jasmine and sandalwood mixed in the air of the little shop. Her eyes immediately land on the A-B section first where she spots ABBA and The Beatles, and her fingers tenderly run over the cover art. 

“Like a kid in a candy shop,” Harry observes fondly. “Pick out whatever you want,”

“Are you serious?” Alani asks, eyes wide.

He shrugs nonchalantly. “Course. Wanted to make a contribution to your collection,”

“I don’t know,” she smiles sheepishly. “I don’t want you spending a lot of money on me. I really appreciate the offer, though,”

“So what if you pick some out for me, too? Then we can think of it as compensation for your generous musical recommendations,” Harry puts forward.

“You make music for a living,” Alani scoffs. “What do you need my recommendations for?”

“What, you think musicians are born knowing every song that exists?”

“Okay, fine. Who can we credit for your music taste, then?”

Harry mulls it over for a second, a gentle hum vibrating in his Adam’s apple, before he responds. “My mum, mostly. Some friends—”

“—Any exes?” Alani fishes. 

“Yeah,” he confirms shyly. “Some I guess. You?”

“Same, pretty much,”

“Right, well now you’ve gotta tell me where you picked up all of these albums ‘cause I don’t wanna be buying shit your ex-boyfriend introduced you to,” Harry teases to lighten the mood. 

An amused exhale escapes from Alani’s nose and she shakes her head. “No, I meant your exes also inspired me,”

 She holds up a record with the numbers “1989″ and a familiar blonde on the cover, and Harry shoots her an unamused look. “Okay, now you’re just being mean again,”

“Long hair, slicked back, white t-shirt,” Alani sings as he turns to walk away. 

“Keep it up and you’re gonna be buying your own bloody records!”

“Cause we never go out of style, we never go out of style,” 

Harry gives her a sharp side-eye, but the faint curl of his lips betrays the intended message of his glare. “Why are you doing this to me?”

“Because it’s a good song,” Alani giggles. “And you’re just being a hater,”

“Thanks,”

Alani turns on her heel with Harry’s palm pressed firmly against hers, and continues to sort through the collection of vinyls. The two of them snake through the aisles and pull albums that they think the other person would enjoy. Harry grabs one from Wings that has been in his recent playlists while Alani explains that he absolutely must own the vinyl version of “AM” by the Arctic Monkeys. He picks out a Shania Twain and highlights the track “You’re Still the One,” which Alani counters with The Mamas and the Papas. 

“Wait,” Alani stops, pulling another record excitedly. “You gotta have this one as a starter,” 

Harry accepts the copy of Queen’s “A Day at the Races” and adds it to the growing pile. “A classic, of course,”

“And I already have its sister album, ‘A Night at the Opera,’ so we can share, ” she suggests, turning back to her browsing. 

Harry’s phone rings and he shuffles the albums around in his arms before lifting it to his ear. “Hello?”

“Hey,” Jeff’s voice carries through the speaker. “Film crew’s here. Are you on your way?”

“Shit,” Harry curses, eyes shutting tight. 

“You forgot?”

“I’ll be there as soon as possible,”

He had completely disregarded all of his previous plans in favor of spending every possible minute with Alani. One of those plans, however, was a mini documentary following the formation of his debut solo album which would start filming that day and continue over the course of the week. 

“No worries,” Jeff continues. “Might wanna give Alani a heads up if you bring her, though.”

“Thanks, mate. See you soon.” Harry says before ending the call. 

Alani had only been half listening, still admiring the artwork of the vinyl covers. “Everything okay?”

“Music thing I forgot about. Gotta go back to the house for a bit,”

“Okay,” she nods understandingly, though it pains her to do so. “So you can just drop me off at my house and we’ll hang tomorrow,”

“Tomorrow?” Harry repeats. “I can pick you up after work, it’ll just be for the afternoon,”

Alani shakes her head apologetically. “My dad’s picking me up on his way home from the airport. He’s getting back from his trip tonight and he’ll wanna see me and my sister,”

“Oh,” he relents, defeated. “Okay, so tomorrow morning?”

“Well, tomorrow afternoon. I work the morning shift,”

Harry groans. “Twenty-four hours?” 

“We’ll be fine,” Alani chuckles, taking some of the records from his hands to lighten the load.

“Distance makes the heart grow fonder and all that,”

“That’s a load of bollocks,” 

“Bollocks? God you’re so British,”

“And you are so American,” Harry pouts over the sudden derailment of his romantic afternoon plans. “God, this sucks,”

Alani offers him a kiss to soothe the sting, which he accepts with a hum. “Majorly. But hey, what can you do? The music calls.”

They check out and she carries the bag on her hip, the temporary relief of retail therapy distracting her from the disappointment of their time cut short. Harry checks the time and calculates that he’ll be a little later than promised, but he’s more concerned with making every second with Alani count. There’s a bit of cloud coverage over his usual sunny disposition, so she tries her best to cheer him up by lifting their intertwined fingers and pressing gentle kisses to his knuckles. 

“Thank you for the most perfect afternoon,” she murmurs against his skin.

“Wasn’t supposed to be over for a few more hours.” 

“Every minute with my favorite guy is like heaven.” Alani admits, watching intently as his smile slowly returns. 

********

“How’s California?”

“You know, it’s kinda growing on me. My nana and pops send their love,” 

“Aw, miss them,” Alani smiles, shifting the phone to her other ear. She decided to spend her free afternoon catching up with her best friend still on the mainland, though her thoughts occasionally drifted back to Harry. “Any cute surfer boys?”

“Maybe one,” Maleah confides. “But it’s nothing serious,”

“And you’ve been holding out on me?” Alani gasps. 

“His name’s Max, he’s a lifeguard,”

“I demand photos immediately,”

“Sure thing,” Maleah giggles sweetly. “Speaking of boytoys, where’s yours? I thought you two were attached at the lips at all times,”

Alani walks her toes up the wall, a soft grin easing onto her face when she spots the pink sticky note from earlier. She turns her head to Harry’s spot and takes a deep breath to soak in the lingering scent of vanilla.

“Working, kinda,”

Maleah frowns. “Doing what exactly?”

“Some music thing. I guess they’re filming a behind the scenes mini-film or something, I’m not entirely sure. Harry was kind of cryptic,”

“That’s weird,”

Alani sits up. “Do you think it sounds fishy?”

“No way. Mr. Perfect would never,” Maleah assures her. “But you know him best. What does your heart tell you?”

It hadn’t even crossed Alani’s mind that Harry might not be telling the truth, but for a brief, guilt ridden moment she considers it. She quickly closes that door after considering all the things he had already been so open about. “He would tell me if something was up,”

“Then there you go,” Maleah says decisively. “That’s good that you guys are so open. Communication is key as they say,”

“Yeah, absolutely. Mind if I gush for a second?”

“Of course not, spill!” Maleah urges her. 

Alani recaps the events of the last couple of days, from the painting and the heart-shaped pancakes to the record store. The weight of Harry’s absence grows heavier with each passing minute until it forms a lump at the back of her throat, but she swallows it down.

“Wow,” Maleah swoons. “What planet did this guy come from, and are there more of him there?”

“Sometimes I think he’s too good to be true, like I made him up or something,”

“Can you make me one like that, too?”

Alani giggles. “What about Max?”

“Well hey, maybe we can all double date sometime,” her best friend suggests eagerly. “He’s kind of coming to visit when I go back home,”

“I thought you said it wasn’t serious?”

“Yeah, well, I just didn’t wanna jinx it,” Maleah explains shyly. “So whaddya say? Think Harry will be in town a couple more weeks for us all to meet up?”

Alani searches her brain for any mention of Harry’s travel plans and it suddenly dawns on her that she didn’t know how long he planned to stay, or where he would go once he did eventually leave the island. He had said once that he considered London his home, but it hadn’t exactly been a straight answer. The thought of his inevitable departure makes her stomach turn, so she musters up a more hopeful answer than what reflects her worries. “Definitely.”

********

Harry rushes into the house and runs a hand through his disheveled hair. The voices of his manager and friends mixed with the unfamiliar chatter of another person echo from the kitchen, and he takes a deep breath to steady his nerves. 

“I’m sorry for being so late,” he apologizes with an outstretched hand towards one of the strangers he’d only conversed with over emails. “It’s nice to meet you,”

"Paul,” the man offers warmly. “Paul Dugdale,”

“Harry,”

Paul introduces the rest of the film crew that will be following the band for the week and Harry extends a gracious welcome to each of them, despite secretly wishing that he’d never agreed to the project in the first place. Every minute on camera, he realizes, is another agonizing minute away from Alani. 

“So listen,” Paul instructs. “Based on everything we’ve discussed in our creative meetings, we’re gonna approach this very fly-on-the-wall style. Very little intervention, you won’t even notice we’re here,”

“Good deal,” Harry nods. 

“We’ll save the interviews for when you come back to London in two weeks,”

“I’m sorry, what was that you just said?”

Paul’s brows furrow. “About the interviews?”

“The two weeks bit,” Harry clarifies. 

“Oh, right. Well we’re gonna need you back in London in two weeks so we can film the sit-down interviews that will sort of guide the narrative. But don’t worry, we already scheduled it around the Dunkirk shoots so there shouldn’t be any conflicts.”

Harry’s head spins. He had been living in such a carefree bubble with Alani that every other responsibility in his life career-wise had slipped his mind entirely. There was no way on Earth that he could pack everything up and leave just when things had started to fall into place for them. With uneasiness burrowing a whole in the pit of his stomach, Harry musters up a pleasant smile. “Course, sounds great.”

The film crew sets up quickly and urges Harry and his friends to go about their usual business, but nothing feels natural about the clock ticking away inside the singer’s mind. He had always known that he was living on borrowed time in Hawai’i, but he hadn’t planned on finding something worth sticking around for. There had to be something he could do, some way that he could stay even if it was just until the end of summer before Alani would have to return to school full-time in the fall. Despite the uncertainty surrounding his plan to buy more time, one thing is certain: he can’t tell Alani until he has a solid course of action. Harry is fully aware of the risk he runs by leaving her in the dark, but it seems less daunting than the possibility of her ending things because of the sudden expiration date put on their relationship. And no matter how long Harry is able to extend their time together, he knows it won’t be easy to leave Alani and everything they had built together behind. His anxious fingers fiddle with the strings of the guitar resting in his lap as he imagines what it will take to prove his feelings, wishing all the while that he could just hold her in his arms and hear her say that everything would be alright. 

********

Alani yawns, but she rubs the drowsiness out of her eyes and returns her fingers to the keyboard. She isn’t sure whether she should go through with the Rolling Stone submission, but writing has always been her way of processing her thoughts, so she decides not to let the material that she already has go to waste. Her phone buzzes on the nightstand next to her cup of coffee and she lifts it gently before reading the caller ID. 

“Hey, sunshine,” she murmurs.

“Did I wake you?”

“Nah, just doing some writing,”

A smirk tugs at the corners of Harry’s mouth. “Anything I would like?”

“It’s about you,” 

“Love it already,”

Alani giggles softly on the other end and it makes Harry’s chest ache. “Funny that you called. I’m actually having a bit of writer’s block,”

“Alright, let me help you out,” Harry clears his throat. “Harry Styles: aspiring musician, fashion novice, phenomenal lover—”

“—And the most humble person I know,”

“Yeah put that, too,” he adds playfully. “Hey, what time are you working tomorrow?”

Alani yawns and closes her laptop for the night. “Eight to three,”

“Shit,”

“She works hard for the money or whatever Donna Summer said,”

Harry checks the time on his phone—23:39—and he decides to act quickly. “Can you stay awake for another 20 minutes?”

“Yeah, I guess. Why?” Alani questions, taking a sip of her tepid coffee.  

“Just don’t fall asleep. I’ll call you back in a few.”

“Okay.”

She assumes that Harry must have gotten busy again and puts on a movie to keep her awake. Fifteen minutes pass and her eyelids are as heavy as bricks, but the ringing of her phone nearly causes her to jump out of her skin. 

“Hello?” she answers weakly. 

“Rapunzel, Rapunzel, let down your hair! Or a ladder, preferably,”

Alani’s face scrunches in confusion. “What?”

“I’m outside, sweets,” 

She quickly jumps to her feet and makes her way over to the window at the opposite side of her room. Sure enough, Harry is waiting below with a thumbs up and she chuckles to herself as she lifts the windowpane up. 

“What are you doing?”

“Climbing this tree I guess, since you’re no help,” he explains, already finding his footing in the Acacia Koa outside her window. 

“We have a front door, you know,”

Harry swiftly maneuvers from branch to branch, which frankly surprises himself as much as it does Alani. When he finally reaches the window and hoists himself inside, a victorious grin spreads across his face punctuated by a dimple on each cheek. “Can James Marsden do that?”

“You’re crazy,” Alani muses, an incredulous look in her eye. 

Harry shrugs and reaches behind his back to close the window gently. “Only about you,”

Alani wraps her arms around his neck and pulls him in for a warm kiss, humming when she feels his strong hands smooth up and down her spine. 

“Missed you,” he whispers against her lips, tickling her sides lightly. 

She giggles and tightens her embrace. “Missed you more,”

Harry kicks off his shoes and follows Alani into her bed, his head tilting when he spots a familiar picture tacked to her ceiling. “Is that—?”

“—An original from my favorite up-and-coming painter, Harry Styles?” she questions, completing his thought. “Why yes, it is. But it’s not for sale, so don’t even think about it,”

“Right next to the O’Keeffe one,” he boasts. “I’m honored,”

“You should be,”

Harry searches his memory to no avail. “Where did you say the original was?” 

“New York Botanical Garden,” Alani murmurs against his neck, fighting the fatigue weighing on her muscles. 

“I’m gonna take you one day,”

“Promise?”

“Promise,” he affirms with a feathery kiss to her temple. 

Alani sits up and rests her chin on his chest, peering down at him with sleepy eyes and a sweet smile.

“Can’t wait,”

“I should probably go,” Harry breathes deeply, his own exhaustion settling in. “Let you sleep. I just wanted a good-night kiss,”

“No, stay. I’m not even tired,” Alani pleads. 

“Your droopy eyes say otherwise,”

“So tell me something to keep me awake,”

Harry swallows. He searches his brain for something to say other than the news that he isn’t ready to break yet. “Like what?”

“Liiiike,” Alani sighs. “Why One Direction broke up,”

“It’s not a very interesting story,”

“I don’t believe you, but whatever. Tell me a secret, then,”

“A secret,” Harry leans in close, the tip of his nose brushing agains the apple of her cheek. “I really wanna kiss you now,”

Alani pulls back the slightest bit to steal a glance at his mouth, already parted enough for her to slot her lips between his. She buries her fingertips in the soft curls at the nape of his neck and the taste of Harry’s spearmint washes over her tongue. His hands brace each side of her neck as he plucks needy kiss after needy kiss from her generous lips. 

“I can’t believe we didn’t even make it a whole day apart,” Alani jokes when they pull apart slowly. 

“It’s after midnight,” Harry mumbles against her skin. “So we kinda did.”

She chuckles and plants a delicate peck to his forehead. “I love the way your mind works.”

[imagine-docx]

for b.

Summary: The three times Bucky was insecure, and the one time you proved you loved him with your entire heart. [continuation of sneaky] [chubby!neighbour!au]

Warnings: body shaming, self doubt, swearing

A/N: the amount of love i got on sneaky is astronomical! thank you all for reading my work, and for those of you who asked, here’s a lil part 2 for you. - amanda 💛

if you haven’t read sneaky, click here to read it. reading it isn’t necessary, but many highly recommend reading it. 

∘₊✧──────✧₊∘

You’ve made thousands of horrible decisions over the course of your life, but dating James Buchanan Barnes is not one of them. Dating him is probably one of the best things to happen to you. You still get butterflies anytime he picks you up from work, spontaneously calls you, random ‘i love you texts’, the entire works.

Since dating Bucky, you’ve seen his insecurities at an all time high. Which was completely understandable considering what happened to him in his last relationship.

For the first three weeks, he always tried hiding his metal arm. That was until one night you two were watching a movie in your living room and you practically had to crawl into his metal arm and reassure you loved him, metal arm or not.

He constantly shied away from your cell phone’s camera. Which ultimately resulted in you taking cute couple photos when he was asleep, and his face was buried in your neck, but he doesn’t know those photos exist.

One night the two of you were working at your living room table and he bent to give you a slice of pie, and his stomach accidentally brushed your arm. Which resulted in word vomit from him apologizing, and you opening the floodgate of reassurance telling him not to apologize and he was the cutest thing to exist.

The longer the two of you dated, it got slightly better, but still your heart ached at the fact that he doesn’t see himself as worthy enough to date you.

∘₊✧──────✧₊∘

The morning after the first time you two had sex, was probably the worst you’ve seen him at.

That morning he rolled over to wrap his arm around you, but that was until he was greeted with a cold and empty space next to him. He opened his eyes and realized you were gone. He rolled back onto his back and covered his eyes with his flesh arm, and felt the tears form in his eyes. He knew you would be too disgusted at his naked body, and were right to run when you could.

He suddenly felt a weight straddling him, as well as a pair of soft hands cradle his face, “Baby? What’s wrong?”

His eyes snapped open, there you were in one of his old red henleys and your panties, “You’re here? I thought you left,” he managed to stammer out.

“Alpine looked like he was about to kill you if you withheld food from him for another twenty minutes. Though I love Alpine, I love having a super cuddly boyfriend more,” you said stroking the stubble that littered his jaw, “Now what’s got my baby boy upset?”

“I thought you left after seein-” you cut him off before he even got to his point.

“Nope, and I never will,” you looked into his eyes, “Buck, I love you for you. Six pack or not. Metal arm or not. That doesn’t change the fact that I love you, and will continue to love you.” You pushed the stray strands of hair out of his face, “I fell in love with that heart of gold you have. The one that cooks me dinner when I work late because he’s worried I'm not eating good. Or when he comes and picks me up out of nowhere for coffee. Or all those times we’ve cuddled while watching movies and you pretend you don’t fall asleep. Hell even when you’re pissed off at Mario Kart. I love everything about you.”

Bucky teared up once again before pulling you into his arms and engulfing you in the tightest hug you’ve ever gotten. He buried his face into your hair, “I love you so much doll.”

“I love you more Buck, don’t forget that,” you said stroking his back.

“Can we stay here all day?” He asked.

“As much as I want to say yes, we need food,” you said, as he pulled away and looked into your eyes.

“All the food I need is here,” he said squeezing at your hips.

“Listen babe, as much as this is fun, you worked up an appetite. I’m gonna need to eat if you’re gonna be jumping at my bones all day,” you said stroking his hair, “I got Wanda to drop off bagels and coffee, so we need to eat.”

He groaned before letting out a, “Fine.” He untangled himself from you, and got up and put on a pair of boxers, he looked back to see you looking at him biting your lower lip. “Are you checking me out?”

“Why wouldn’t I? You’re the hottest thing to walk this earth,” you said getting up from the bed.

He wrapped his arms around your waist before planting a peck onto your lips, “I love you.”

You wrapped your arms around his neck, “I love you more. Now go brush your teeth and I’ll meet you downstairs.”

He planted another soft one before releasing you, and the moment he turned around, he felt a light tap on his ass. He turned back to see you practically ran out of the bedroom giggling. You would be the death of James Buchanan Barnes.

The rest of your day consisted of random love making on random surfaces, cuddling, napping and eating.

∘₊✧──────✧₊∘

The second time you’ve caught his insecurities at a high was one night that the entire office had to go for drinks late in the evening and he shot you a ‘SOS’ text.

You let yourself in with the key he gave you and made your way up to his bedroom, walking in, you saw the amount of clothing that buried his bed, and Alpine snuggled against one of his military green t-shirts.

You saw Bucky’s back in the closet, you quickly lifted up Alpine who meowed at you, and took the shirt and hid it under your body.

He didn’t know you were there, because he walked back and threw yet another set of clothes and yelped when he saw you were there, “Jesus Christ doll, warn me when you’re here next time.”

“Now as much as I love fashion, I didn’t think you were into it. So what’s happening?” You asked him, as he held up two shirts against his body in the mirror.

“Office drinks, and I have no clue what to wear. I was hoping my fashionable girlfriend would help her clueless boyfriend out,” he said turning around and pouting at you.

“I guess I have to put my job to use,” you jokingly said.

Looking at the pile of clothes on his bed, you knew he was searching for too long before he sent you the text. Kind of like how you can tell how old a fossil is based on how much material is on top of it.

“Did I break my girlfriend? Does she not even know where to start?” He jokingly asked.

“No, just my boyfriend being stupid and not realizing he looks cute in everything he wears,” you responded, looking under his pile of clothes.

He could feel his cheeks burn up, he wrapped his arms around your waist and buried his face into your hair, “Thank you.”

You managed to pull out a military green bomber jacket, a black t-shirt and some black jeans. “Bam, an outfit.”

He kissed your hair before pulling away, “Thank you doll.”

He was about to walk into the washroom to change, “Where do you think you’re going?” You asked.

“To change in the washroom?” He said, confused.

“Change here,” you said.

“A-are you sure?” He stuttered out.

“Buck, I’ve seen you naked thousands of times, this isn’t any different,” you said reassuring him.

He walked back to the bed, and slowly peeled his current outfit off of his body and replaced it with the one you provided him.

“What do you think?” He asked.

“I think that this would look better on the floor,” you said slyly.

He chuckled before throwing the shirt he was previously wearing at you, “Jokes on you, you’re never getting this back.”

“That’s fine with me doll, you look better in my clothes than I do,” he said.

“Are you sweet talking me to avoid paying me for styling services?” You faked offence.

“Is it working?” He joked back.

“A little,” you said fanning yourself.

He laughed, before coming around the other side of the bed, and wrapped his arms around your waist, and you instantly wrapped your arms around his neck. “Will you be here when I come back?” He asked.

“Can I borrow your Disney plus then?” You asked.

“Of course doll, you can have anything you want,” he said kissing your forehead.

“I think you made the worst decision telling me that,” you responded, burying your face into his chest.

“And why’s that?” he hummed out.

“I’m stealing your entire closet, and maybe your cat,” you said.

“I said what I said doll, you look better in my clothes.”

He felt this sense of warmth knowing his girlfriend picked out this outfit and he wore a smile with confidence, which didn’t go unnoticed by Sam. And Sam being the number one hype man he is, kept telling Bucky that if he didn’t have a girlfriend he would have snatched him by now.

He came home later than he anticipated, and heard the soft sounds of the tv playing from his room. He walked into his room hoping you were awake, but his heart melted at the site of you curled up in his bed, wearing his shirt, with his cat next to your sleeping form.

He let the TV softly play while he went to shower so he doesn’t wake you. He came back, moved Alpine to his bed on the floor, and crawled underneath the covers with you.

He thought his heart couldn’t get anymore mushy after seeing you in bed, but the moment he laid down, you curled up into his arms, and his heart exploded.

Turning off the TV, he got comfortable with you before falling asleep.

∘₊✧──────✧₊∘

Bucky sat on your couch reading over one of the files for work, while you were typing away at your laptop. Your eyes were starting to hurt while you were finishing the final details for the fall fashion show that is supposed to happen within the next month.

Pushing yourself away from your laptop, you turned to study your boyfriend. He was in sweats, had his hair pulled back in a low bun, and were innocently chewing on the tip of his pen. “Babe?” You called out.

“Hmm?” He hummed out.

“I need to talk to you,” you responded.

He was still staring at the file in his hand, “Shoot doll.”

“I need your attention,” you responded.

He looked up, only to have you throw yourself into his arms and stay there. “Okay what do you want to talk about?” He asked.

“Nothing,” you responded.

“But you wanted my attention?” He asked, even more confused.

“That’s literally it, I needed your attention,” you said burying your face into his shirt.

He chuckled before tossing the file and pen onto the coffee table in front of him, he wrapped his arms around you. “And I thought I was the needy one.”

“How can I resist myself when I have a hunk of meat sitting on my couch?” You asked.

He rubbed gentle circles into your back, “Hunk? Never heard that one.”

“There’s a first time for everything.”

“I guess you’re right about that part doll.”

“Have you ever been to a fashion show?” You asked.

“Not in my lifetime,” he responded.

“Come to the one I have next month?” You asked.

“Will my pretty girlfriend be there?” He asked.

“Of course,” you responded.

“Then I wouldn’t miss it for the world,” he said squeezing you.

∘₊✧──────✧₊∘

It was the morning of the fashion show, and Bucky once again found himself panicking and not knowing what to wear. But this time he couldn’t send a ‘SOS’ to you because you were at work doing last minute touches on the show.

He turned around from his closet only to be greeted by Sam and Steve, “Jesus Christ,” he put a hand over his heart, “Do you knock?”

“No,” Steve responded as Sam dangled the spare key Bucky hid outside.

“Fuck both of you,” he grumbled.

“Listen, your girlfriend sent us because she knew you would have a heart attack picking out an outfit, and she also sent us tickets,” Steve said.

“And I’m gonna make sure my baby boy is dressed real nice,” Sam said, “Now move and let uncle Sam work his magic,” Sam continued before going into Bucky’s closet.

∘₊✧──────✧₊∘

It was 4:30, Sam, Steve and Bucky were standing in the venue sipping champagne whilst waiting for the hall to open for seating. Looking around, Bucky felt so out of place, “You look good Buck,” Steve noticed and reassured him.

“Of course Buck looks good, my man looks good all the time,” Sam said.

“Your man? I’m convinced he’s mine,” he heard a familiar voice from behind him. He turned around and had the air knocked out of him.

There you were, in a long sleeved black sequined shirt, that was tucked into your black shorts, and a pair of knee high heels. Even though it was simple, you were the only person who stood out in the room.

“Sam may be wrong about that, I’m only yours,” he said wrapping his arm around your waist and pulling you into him.

“Sorry Sam, I won this round,” you joked.

“I got the two of you together and now you’re the sole owner for him? I call bullshit,” Sam retaliated.

“Okay fine, you get him Monday to Friday, and I get him weekends,” you negotiated.

“Now you’re talking.” Sam responded.

You heard someone call out your name, knowing you had to be pulled backstage yet again. “I gotta go, I’ll see you after?” You asked.

“Of course,” he said, before you pecked his lips and disappeared to where Carol called you.

“Tinman got some game,” Tony said coming up to the group.

“I didn’t know you were invited,” Steve said.

“I’m always invited to these things Cap, and lucky for you I am sitting next to you guys,” Tony responded, stealing Bucky’s champagne.

∘₊✧──────✧₊∘

Bucky didn’t realize what was happening until Sam nudged his ribcage, “All of those look like things you would wear.”

And yes it was. There were henley’s, t-shirts, sweaters, jeans, sweatpants, hell they were in colours he would wear too, black, red, navy blue, military green, etc. It looked like someone took Bucky’s entire closet and remade all of his clothes and put it on display for him to see.

He also realized there were models of different sizes, some with prosthetics, and he felt his heart swell. He knew you managed to convince everyone there to do this. He never thought you would do it on such a grand scale of doing it at a fashion show.

For the remainder of the show, he sat there with the biggest smile on his face and it didn’t even falter, not even once.

∘₊✧──────✧₊∘

Bucky waited for you to finish up before taking you out for milkshakes and a walk in the park. Since it was colder than when you left this morning, he draped his suit jacket on you, and held your hand. You were sipping on your milkshake before Bucky asked, “Did you put together the entire show for me?”

“What gave it away? The fact I literally stole your closet to do this? Or the fact it’s called ‘For B.’?” You asked.

He nearly choked on his milkshake, “You named it what?”

You stopped and looked him in the eye, “‘For B.’ because it’s for Bucky. I know you always talk about how you aren’t as pretty as models, which is a complete lie might I add and they don’t wear what you wear. So I thought, why not make it for you. I’m sorry if you don’t li-”

You were cut off by Bucky engulfing you into his arms, “Doll, no one has ever done that for me.”

“I love you Buck,” you said looking up at him.

“I love you more doll,” he said, kissing you.

[chuckbass-love]

Why Him? | Ransom Drysdale | Part 14

A/N : Just finished a Loki one shot, it’ll be posted tomorrow and i’m so proud of it. 

Disclaimer: My work is not to be posted anywhere else other than my Tumblr, Wattpad and Ao3. However, reblogs are welcome.

No smut in this one unfortunately but i really enjoyed writing this chapter. Hope you guys love it as much as i do. 

Why Him? MASTERLIST

Ransom’s POV

“It was lovely to see you again Claudia, and you Ransom” grandad says as we all say our goodbyes. “You too, thank you for having us” Claudia hugs him before bidding farewell to my parents. “Hope to see you again soon” they say and we wave to them as we get into my car. “They love you” i beam as i start driving away. “I love them too” she admits. “So it’s 5:30pm now. We have to meet them around 7 ish. I think we should get ready when we get home” i suggest and she nods. “Sure thing babe” i place my hand on her thigh, squeezing it slightly.

“Are you okay?” a hint of worry in her voice “I’m fine doll, don’t sweat it” she shrugs before turning the radio on in the car and bopping her head to the music. To tell the truth, i’m shitting it. I’ve never had to meet a girls friends before, my ex didn’t have many and the few she did have she didn’t want me to meet because she was worried that being with me would ruin her reputation. Whatever that was supposed to mean.

We get back home and she runs inside and up the stairs to choose an outfit. I follow closely behind her since i need to change too. “Okay, this dress or that one?” she holds up a little black dress and a knee length body-con dress that would accentuate her features perfectly. 

“The red one” she shakes her head, unsure “The red one, trust me” she walks over to me on the bed and she straddles me. “What are you doing doll?” i raise my brows “Just can’t keep my hands off of you that’s all” i pull her face closer to mine and kiss her. I swipe my tongue across her bottom lip and she opens her mouth, letting me in. We both get lost in the kiss and eventually i pull away. “We don’t have time for this now baby” she gets off of me in a huff.

“Someone sure is sulky when they don’t get their way huh?” i stand up and head into the closet, she follows. “I just, i can’t stop thinking about how good you fucked me this morning, my pussy is still sore” fuck. 

“Well maybe later we can do it again. If you behave that is” i wink and she bites her bottom lip. I start changing in front of her and she whistles as i pull my shirt off. “Quit it, i’m not a piece of meat doll” she throws her head back laughing. “No, you’re a god. A sex god at that” she’s making it real difficult to be able to control myself.

I finish getting changed, i’m wearing a white shirt, which i rarely wear. My usual slacks and a grey cardigan which i can just take off when we get there. Just as i’m about to leave the closet, i remember something. The love egg. Time for some fun.

“Hey baby, come here” i call out and soon enough she wonders in, all innocent looking.

“Before you change, i’ve got something for you” i was gonna surprise her with the diamond necklace but that’s for another occasion. Since she’s been nagging for my dick, i’ll make her earn it for later. I hold up the toy and dangle it in front of her, her jaw drops. “Bend over” she does and i rub her pussy a little, also making sure to lube up the egg, no need to lube her up since her pussy is always soaked for me. I work it in and she gasps. “That’s it, keep it in there until we get home. You understand”  she nods “I have all the control though doll” her eyes widen at the sight of the little remote in my hand. “No moaning either, got it?” she nods once again and she starts to change.

As she finishes getting ready, she turn to me and i hold her hand, twirling her around. “So beautiful” i’m in awe of her. I can’t help but feel extremely lucky.

We head out to the beamer and i drive us to the bar to meet her friends. I start tapping my fingers on the steering wheel whenever we come to a red light. “Babe, calm down. It’ll be fine i promise” she leans over to place a kiss onto my cheek, to give me some reassurance.

---------------------------------------

“Darcy” she yells in excitement as we enter the bar and she sees her friends. She holds my hand and leads me to through the crowd. This is the same bar that we met at a couple of weeks ago. Funny how one night changed our lives. We reach the back of the bar and her friends are sat in a booth. They all file out of the booth to greet me. 

“Hi, i’m Ransom” i smile, reaching out to shake hands but Darcy pulls me into a hug. “So you’re the one that’s got this one over here all love struck” Claudia gives Darcy a nudge as if to say ‘shush’. I chuckle as i reach Luke “I’m Luke, that’s Darcy and this is James but i think you’ve spoken to him before. It’s nice to meet you” he gives me a hug and then so does James. We all take our seats in the booth, i sit next to Claudia. Opposite James, Darcy and Luke.

I reach my hand into my coat pocket to where the remote is and i press the first button, turning it on. Claudia jolts slightly “What’s wrong?” Luke asks, a look of confusion on his face but she waves it off. “Just accidentally knocked my knee against the table, no biggie” tonight is going to be a lot of fun.

“Wait so your grandad is Harlan Thrombey?” Darcy’s mouth is practically on the ground. “Yeah, Claudia told me and my family that you’re a big fan and he said he’d love to meet you” she squeals “You did not” Claudia laughs. “I did. You know i got you girl” they both start smiling at each other. Brownie points to me.

“So Luke, I know you like cars and well Ransom here has a beamer” he stares at her “Shut up, i’ve always wanted to ride in one. I know, not the best dream but you have to let me tag along in it one day man” i shake his hand “You’re on, i know a track we can race it on if you’re up for it” his eyes go wide as he sips his beer. “For sure, i’m down” i look over at Claudia as i press the second button on the remote, she starts biting at her lip. It’s working.

Tonight is going perfect, i’m getting along so well with all of them. We have loads in common which is great plus i know at the end of the night that Claudia will be like putty in my hands, she’ll be soaked for me. Just how i like her.

I order more drinks, getting myself a non-alcoholic beer since i’m driving and i get chatting to James about interior design. Claudia told him about my house and he said he’s looking for inspiration for his new home that he’s just purchased. 

“Seriously though, you’re welcome to come and look around, maybe it’ll give you some ideas. I can even set you up with my mother too, she helped me with most of it and she’s very good at that sort of thing” we sip at our drinks and continue to chat about everything and anything. Claudia excuses herself to go to the toilet, Darcy follows. Just me and the guys now.

James’s POV

“So now she’s gone, we have to know man. What are your intentions?” Luke quizzes and i nod in agreement to his question. “If i’m being honest, i’m never like this with women but she’s different you know. I truly believe that she’s the one” me and Luke smile from ear to ear, in pure happiness at Ransom’s response. Claudia has been hurt before like most people and we just want the best for her. I can tell that Ransom has a past but what matters the most now is how he treats Claudia.

Claudia’s POV

“So, what do you think?” i ask Darcy, a cubicle separating us. “He’s lovely babes, i approve. He seems to be making you happy, am i right?” i gush at the thought of my man. “I am, i’m genuinely happy for the first time in a long time” i giggle as i feel the egg vibrate more inside of me. That fucker. I have every right to tease him when we get back out there. We finish up and head back out to the guys. I strut up to Ransom and sit down, making sure to flash him a cheeky wink. “I wanna dance, you guys coming?” i suggest but they wave me off. Darcy decides to join me though.

We walk over to the dance floor, i make sure to walk extra sexy, as i know Ransom’s eyes are fixed upon my figure. The song Please Me by Bruno Mars and Cardi B comes on, perfect song for what i’m about to do. I feel the vibrations go up a notch as i sway my hips to the music. 

‘Please me baby, turn around and just tease me baby’

The music goes and i slut drop to the floor with Darcy, my ass in full view of Ransom’s eyes. I know i’m looking sexy and it’s clearly getting to him. I start grinding my hips in a circle as i move up and down, i turn my head and glance over my shoulder at him. He’s covering his crotch and i see him holding the remote. I wink at him again and the vibrations get more intense. Luckily for me, he can’t hear the quiet moan slip out of my mouth.

The song Privacy by Chris Brown comes on next and i get more freaky with my moves, Darcy follows my lead as we start grinding on each other. That’ll send him right over the edge. Minutes later i feel a hand on my waist, i turn around to find Ransom. 

“Hi baby” i whisper in his ear and he glares at me, hunger in his eyes. “What the fuck are you playing at” he growls into my ear as i wrap my arms loosely around his neck. “I don’t know what you’re talking about daddy” i give him my puppy dog eyes and bite my lip in an innocent manner. I can see i’m driving him crazy. I turn around so my ass is pushed against his crotch.

‘Partition’ by Beyonce comes on, time starts going really slow. All the couples in the bar start grinding on each other. Me and Ransom are no exception. I push my ass back even more and i swirl my hips round in circles. I feel his breath on the back of my neck. “You’re really pushing me now doll” this is what he gets for denying me sex earlier and forcing me to wear this vibrator inside of me. It’s time i teased him for once. 

“Someone is gonna get it when they get home” the hairs on the back of my neck stand up, just what i wanted. He thinks he’s getting sex tonight and i have him right where i want him. “We’ll see about that daddy” i lean my head back, resting it on his pecks and leaning up slightly so he can hear me. I stop grinding and walk off of the dance floor to go to the bar, ordering some shots. He follows me.

Ransom’s POV

“I think you’ve had enough doll” that doesn’t stop her though. She pays and takes two shots, one after the other. She then heads back to the booth, me and Darcy join her. 

“I think we should get off now, this one has had one too many” i chuckle, nodding my head towards Claudia who is drunk. “Spoil sport” she scoffs and we all laugh. “It was so nice to meet you” they all say, accidentally in unison as we leave the bar. I hug them all and we part ways. I help Claudia into the passenger seat before jogging round to the driver’s side.

We’re halfway home and Claudia is just sat there in the passenger seat, giggling away to herself. “Doll, you really should know better than to tease me like that” i tap away at the steering wheel, wishing i could get home quicker. “You deserved it” i roll my eyes as i speed up, trying to get home faster.

I pull up and help her into the house. My staff left hours ago. “You’re about to learn a lesson princess” she raises her brows, pushing me off of her. She manages to get away from me and get upstairs as i head into the kitchen to get her some water.

“FUCK” i yell as i run after her with a bottle of water. “Unlock the door NOW” i snap as she locks it just before i get there. “No” i can hear her giggling again. I keep knocking in hopes that she’ll unlock it “Quit the games now doll” she sighs. “You wanna have sex baby? Well too bad” there’s that famous laugh of hers again.

I stop hearing any noise in the bedroom as i press my ear to the door. “Babe” i call out and i get no answer. Shit, i have a spare key for the bedroom door. I head downstairs and into my office. I open my desk drawer to find it. Ah here it is. I race back upstairs and immediately unlock the door. To my surprise though, there she is. Fast asleep on the bed. Snoring slightly. She looks adorable like this. She can’t sleep in that dress and those heels though. I lift her up slightly and do my best to undress her without waking her.  

I leave her in her panties and i pull the covers over her body. I’ll have to get that toy out of her in the morning and leave her to sleep for now in peace. She’ll get her punishment tomorrow.

[jbbuckybarnes]

Distant Connection - 10/11

Pairing: Bucky x Harmonia (OC) Warnings: mentions of wicca/witchcraft, fluff Summary: After an unknown group of goons took her mom’s life and tried to get her for the dark magic powers she possesses, this untaught witch is saved by the Avengers and brought to the compound where her new life unfolds.

MASTERLIST || Distant Connection Masterlist

After a while with her own thoughts, her book and her research the time was right to ask Thor about all these new things. “Thor?” Her voice was very soft and fragile as he looked up from his drink. “Yes, Harmonia?” He smiled his typical soft and dorky smile. “That person that destroyed the compound while you weren’t here. He told me my ancestors were demigods. That I’m a danger for this planet somehow. He told me to visit a place like Asgard to understand what he means. I’m just very confused about all of this.” she rambled. He gestured her to sit down across from him and set down his glass again. “Which ancestors. Do you know that?” He asked. “My full name is Harmonia Gaia Aphrodite. So I’m assuming mainly Aphrodite since Harmonia is Aphrodite's child in mythology. I don’t know if my mother gave me my first and second name based on truths or just because she wanted to.” She explained. “Harmonia, daughter of Aphrodite...” he was thinking out loud, “...Goddess of love, Gaia the goddess of the earth. How could you be a danger? A daughter of love and earth?” “I don’t know. Maybe if I would go to Asgard with you I would have so much energy all of a sudden. Like maybe it’s activating more of my powers? Super confusing.” He called Mjölnir to him, she was used to that thing flying past her at random points of the week by now. “Try to pick it up.” He smiled clearly picking up the doubt she had in herself. “Why?” She was a bit reluctant. “Just do it.” He pushed it over a little bit. She grabbed the handle not expecting to be able to pick it up. Except that she could pick it up and it was pretty much the perfect weight and balance an object could have. Thor’s face lit up, “You are a goddess AND you haven’t a bit of evil in you.” He was proud with every fiber of his body, “I will take you to Asgard the next time. I want to know what this weird person was talking about and if there is something to it.” “But I don’t have to rule Asgard now or something?” She was very shy about her newfound ability. He chuckled and shook his head, “Only if you want to.” “No thanks, that seems a little bit too much.” She wheezed. “We can prank the others now. With the hammer.” He nudged his head towards the fridge and they both interchanged a mischievous smirk.

“THOR! PEOPLE IN THIS HOUSE HAVE FOOD IN THIS FRIDGE AND WOULD LIKE TO ACCESS IT!” Steve yelled through the whole compound. Harmony walked in completely unfazed, “As if the golden boy can’t pick that thing up.” “I tried, believe me.” He smiled at her behind him, “It’s harder than it looks.” “Oh really?” She had a look on her face that made him feel judged. “Try it yourself, sassy witch.” He held his arms up and made some space for her. She walked up to it, picked it up deadpanning and put it on the counter with his jaw being almost on the floor. “Don’t know what you have. That’s maybe 25 pounds.” She shrugged. He took a deep breath to clearly yell but she held her hand in front of his mouth, “If you tell anyone I’ll fry you with that thing. Let me prank them.” As soon as her hand left his mouth he smirked at her, “Worthy, huh? Does Thor know?” “Yes. You should’ve seen his proud face.” She jumped a bit out of excitement. “Who do you wanna prank next?” He was a curious little shit sometimes. “Don’t know. Maybe James?” She smiled up at him innocently. “What is with me?” His dark voice suddenly was in the door behind her. “Nothing.” She still had the innocent smile on her face. “Babe!” His face turned serious. “It’s a surprise, okay?” She smiled up at him now that he was in front of her. “You’re plotting something. I can see it in your eyes.” He narrowed his eyes. She gave her most innocent smile and gave him a short kiss on his lower jaw before leaving back to her room to continue her studies on offense magic. The next day started slowly but early. Too early for her taste but she planned on training what she studied the afternoon before anyway. She was trying to slice the stones now and explode them from the inside without letting the explosion get to big. James on the way to the training room saw her already being up and going strong and watched her for a few minutes with his coffee cup in his hand.

When his coffee was finally emptied he set it down right there and went outside to the stone circle. “You’re doing better, honey.” He scared the hell out of her making her send red magic his way and making him flinch. The magic was stopped by the purple protection spell around him. She immediately went to him to give him a hug with a small pout, “Sorry.” “It’s alright.” He gave a small kiss into her hair. “You’re building resilience at the moment. I’m proud to see you do that stuff. And I’m grateful you have that spell on me cause...I’m not a fan of being sliced into pieces by my best girl.” His voice made it clear he was smiling. She looked up, “Good, now fuck off. I need to learn and offense training is really nothing I’ll do with real people unless it’s Wanda.” She smiled at the end to show him that she wasn’t mad. “What if I don’t go?” His smile was daring. “Then I’ll make you.” She mirrored his face. “Well, make me then.” He crossed his arms. Blue magic started forming in her left hand slowly building towards his head. “Make me. Without brainwashing.” He set new rules. She held out her right hand, “Oh, I will.” A second later the hammer landed perfectly in her hand and his eyes got wide. “I said fuck off,” she said serious but they both knew she wasn’t mad. “You- I- Uuh-” His mind was blown. “A ‘Yes, my majesty’ works.” She smiled at him. “Oh, believe me. You don’t even need that to make me kneel in front of you on command.” He was still not calm about what had just happened. He stared at her like a deer looked into headlights. “Good.” She smiled satisfied, “Would you please scatter off, peasant.” “Just if I get a kiss, my dearest Queen.” He took her free hand and bowed while suppressing a giggle. “Of course.” She almost sounded British. He leaned down a little and gave her a soft kiss before giggling, “Is this what you meant yesterday?” “Yes, Steve’s face was one for the books. But we can talk about that later, okay?” She smiled up at him before nudging him to go and watch from afar again.

“Why is this damn hammer sitting on my new suit designs?” Tony yelled through the compound. “You need more sleep, old man. We all know Pepper is on a business trip and isn’t properly kicking your ass from across the planet.” Harmony answered. “They literally only need to have some of the color parts changed before going into production. For Christ’s sake,” he yelled back. She walked into his office to see him pacing up and down the room. “Tony. Get some rest. The suits are literally not running away from you.” She chuckled. “I just want to finish it now, put it into the computer and test it tomorrow,” he was explaining. “Promise that you will go to sleep before midnight?” She was serious. He rolled his eyes “Fine. Could you all just…” He was about to mention Thor when he saw her pick up the hammer and stopped in his tracks. “You better listen to me while Pepper isn’t here. No second past midnight or I’ll brainwash you into falling asleep right here,” she said brutally honest but smiling with good intentions. “Yes, MOM.” He literally was a five-year-old in his workshop. “Have fun with the suit design.” She smiled while walking out.

[p---leia]

Ancient Writer of dreams and nightmares: I am 71 (-one month), and have been writing (making up tales) since I was three. I can still remember my Pawpaw whittling a pencil for me, and Mawmaw tearing a piece of brown grocery bag for me to write on. They weren't 'poor', but writing paper wasn't to be wasted on a 'kid' just for fun. I carefully scripted my first short story.

Of course my 'letters' looked more like ancient Hanguel, so I had to read it to my "captured" audience. I really don't remember the story, but as my grandparents had a yard full of chickens and my dog, Mutt, liked to chase them (because of this we 'both' got into trouble -- because I always joined the chase) I most probably wrote about that.

My Pawpaw was a story-teller. For several years I thought there really was a baby found in the wilds of the African jungle and raised by the great apes. I thought he was the luckiest babe, EVER!

Then I found Pawpaw's books about three years after he died. I was eleven when he died, and felt that my best friend had abandoned me. But when I found those books I realized just where Tarzan actually came from and went to. I read everyone of those books and got the complete picture. THEN..

Well, Pawpaw also told stories of Daniel Boone and Davey Crocket...before I saw them on Disney. Then, of course, I went to school and learned what I already knew. Pawpaw was an excellent story-teller and never mixed up his facts, time-lines, or characters.

Growing up under his influence had a lot to do with how I developed as a story-teller. At family gatherings when I meet cousins I haven't seen in decades, they STILL remember me and the stories that I used to tell them. My children and grandchildren have grown up with me re-telling Pawpaw's old stories, and sharing many that I made up on the spot.

But I think what I read in my early years developed my writing style.

I was just turned eight when I read my first Shakespeare, MIDSUMMER NIGHT'S DREAM. He was my first favorite author. Then I was forced to read Romeo and Juliet. I was disgusted by the fact that TRAGEDY was made famous as a ROMANCE! Even at the innocent (then) age of fourteen, I was disgusted with the idea that it was considered romantic for 'anyone', let alone 'teenagers' to commit suicide over unrequited love.

My sister (now 68) and I recently discussed this play. Because she had a 'forbidden' teenage love, she said that she related to the story (even though she had never read it). GASP! It was required reading in ninth grade!

I remember our dad breaking up my sister and her boyfriend, who was really cool. He was a hard working farm boy who had saved his money to buy a motorcycle. AND his own car. But he wasn't good enough for my sister. smh

I always thought her story would make a great LifeTime movie. But I'm not touching it. She would 'skin me' for sharing with the world her broken heart. And if I added the stuff that sells today, she'd scalp me for lying. Not a win situation at all. So, I will write notes in my "Random Jottings Journal" for future decendants who might grow into writers or story-tellers.

By the way, the title "RANDOM JOTTINGS" came from a sci-fi book that I read as a kid in the fifties. I don't remember the author, although I'm pretty sure it 'might' be from a Heinlein juvenile book. But I've never found a reference to any sci-fi books using that term. SO!!! If anyone recognizes "RANDOM JOTTINGS", which was a note book that a professor/scientist/genius used to keep his 'thoughts', PLEASE share the author's name and the title of the book!!! Thank You.

In the meantime, I referenced Shakespeare. James Oliver Curwood wrote about Kazan, the Wolf Dog, and later Baree, Son of Kazan. From those two books, read when I was eleven, I searched for and found other books about Canada. Later there was Walter Farley, author of the Black Stallion, and the Island Stallion series. I think I met my FIRST friendly alien in the Island Stallion Races.

Of course, Edgar Rice Burroughs taught me much false history about the jungles of Africa, as well as the Moon and Mars. But I loved every 'read-under-the-covers-with a-flashlight' minute! I believe he was a contemporary of Zane Grey, because he wrote a few non-jungle and non-space stories, too. Which led me to Zane Grey.

Having read both of their biographies at a young age, I learned about the hardships of being a writer. I should say 'the hardships of a struggling writer'. I have never had a problem writing. Since I write for 'fun' and not 'profit', the few short stories I've had published were by local press, and a State magazine.

No, my struggles have centered around graduating high school, and completing college, stuggling to satisfy my husband, a 'Mr. Spock in the Flesh' personality, and later raising two children without benefit of parental support or child support. But we survived in the middle of laughter and many tears. And my made up stories about children lost in the woods who were rescued by a great friendly bear, or wolf. Or dog. And sometimes by a great Black Panther - a by product of one of my Pawpaw's 'local historical tales'.

I understand that publishers detest stories that begin with "It was a dark and stormy night.." But let me tell you, some of the BEST bedtime stories occur on stormy nights when the power has gone out, and it's too hot for candles or lanterns. That shadow that stands darkest in the corner and seems to be moving towards the bed is actually grandma come to check on the kids, and stands quiet so not to disturb the kids if they're already asleep. But since they are awake, and they see her 'shadow', she becomes the old crone who lives in the castle dungeon, and has slipped her chains to visit with the 'wee folk'. But there are no fairies out on such a blustery night, so the old crone comes to visit with the 'wee bairn', who fall all over themselves to get out of bed and sit around her to hear her stories of 'long ago' and other 'dark and stormy nights'. Again -- unpublished, because publishers don't like ... LOL

Of course there's always On-Line publishing. But that involves more work than actual writing.

Back to the writrs who influenced my writing:

While I enjoy a good Western, an adventurous space trek, or time travel, I also enjoy the occasional Historical Romance. Georgette Heyer was my first! I still re-read her amazing books. Of course there's Jane Austen.

There are a myriad of modern writers that I have read over the last five decades. Heinlen, Asimov, Norton, Bradley, McCaffrey, Moon, Stirling, Krentz/Castle/Quick, and Moening, just to name a few of the ones whose books I have in my personal library.

Those older authors did affect my writing style to develope as I read their stories. The later authors helped me to move into the late 20th century. But I'm not so sure that I like the 21st century so much. It's all about being politically 'correct'. If you aren't ashamed of your gender, your race, your country, your religion, your culture, your family, your history, then you are prejudiced. That's just too much guilt to have to live with.

I'm still dealing with my mom's death from ten years ago. I was her care-giver for five years. Her doctor had given her nine months. I still worry if I did enough for her in those last years.

And though my children are grown with their own families, I worry that I wasn't a good enough parent. And I worthy as a grandmother? How was I as an older sister? I was responsible as a moral guide when our parents were at work. Was I a good neighbor? A good support in our Church? And Hollywood wants me to feel guilt about something I can't change?!!

I'm an old woman who still likes being a woman and enjoys liking men. I'm not just white. I'm also mixed with a bit of Native American, and even a drop of -- OMG!!! --- Black. snicker.

That's a serious joke, because as a kid I had a recuring nightmare that I was a black man being judged by a group of people in white hoods I was hanged amidst their fiery torches. I always thought those white hoods represented the Catholic Church, because at that young age I didn't know about the Ku Klux Klan. Even though I grew up in the South, my family was not involved with that group of out-lawrey. Thank God!

Still, I'm supposed to feel shame? For something not even my family supported.

I've always believed there's a hint of Fae in my DNA. Because I love dancing in the light of the full moon, and flying with the owls who perch outside my bedroom window and call to invite me to follow the moon's shadow. If I am part Fae, I know it came from my mother's people. They were Irish mixed with Alabama Indians who believed in the Nunnehi aka Immortal, and the Yunwi Tsunsdi, aka Little People.

ALSO, while there's no DNA proof of ancestry, I've always been a 'closet Chinese'.

In the Fifties, when WW2 was still fresh, and we were involved with the 'Korean Conflict', and at odds with China, I would sneak around the radio, turn down the volume, and tune into 'that wierd channel' that sometimes played Opera, or Chinese music. Ahhh. I would close my eyes and wander through the few visuals I'd found in books, or the occasional movie. (before color tv)

A year or two ago I was totally depressed and disgusted with American TV. Hollywood has become so political, so wierd. Their programming is no longer for entertainment, but to 'educate, enlighten, or to inform'. zzzzz

Then I found KDrama!!!!! Korean TV. Japanese Tv. squeal!!! Chinese TV.

The rom/coms are sweet and 'pure'. Okay. I'm realistic. This is not a reflection of real life on any planet. But the innocence of the early 1950s programs is there. Similar to Disney's 'Summer Magic'. I'm happy with those dramas that remind me of thati nnocence. I have found a few dramas that shared more than I cared for, and I do enjoy an occasional 'romp'. But I've always preferred the Lady and Gentleman characters.

And watching these programs have reminded me of those fairy tales and legends from my childhood that had been sprinkled with the Occasional Oriental myth, legend, and children's tale.

Then I remembered my FIRST historical legend. "The White Stag" by Kate Seredy, is the tale of Atilla the Hun!

I recently found a copy of that book and am waiting for a quiet time, when the power is out and there's nothing to do. Then I will use one of the many flashlights I bought for a huge hurricane, and relax on the sofa beneath an open window and read this legend once again. I live in Florida. The odds of this happening increases as the summer progresses. I can't wait to learn if my memory of this tale of Atilla the Hun remained true, or has been distorted in the last half of a century.

Most of the tales that I write involve space adventures, the occasioanl ghost, and encounters with fairies, the evil ones, not the romantic ideal fairy. smh

I've never been very good with romance or comedy. But thanks to the recent influence of the Asian productions, I have re-formatted one of my dark adventures and turned it into a rom/com.

I love a good joke, but very seldom get the point or see the humor. And I can NEVER remember the punch line if I try to share a joke. My family have said they will write on my tombstone --

"I don't remember the punchline ... but it was funny."

But as I write humorous lines or events I find myself laughing. Or crying at sad events. And I am all 'giggly' when I write what is supposed to be innocent romance between a young and shy couple. But I have never felt that my own reactions were a true guide to how the story might come across to a 'reader'.

As it happens, I have two sisters younger than I am. My middle sister is bored easily and immediately redirects our conversation to something about 'her'. Okay. I understand. She is lonely, needy, and maybe a bit selfish? Not judging. She's the 'middle child' and that's her excuse. ROFL..

But the youngest sister is my greatest fan who declares that I am an awesome writer. "I love you, sister, dear."

So she visited me last week and patiently listened as I read the first chapter. She listened quietly, and I wondered if I had 'read her to sleep'. sigh. Boring books are often the best sleeping pill. Then I heard her laugh.

Squeals/Dancing/hooting/flying around the room in ecstasy!!

Okay! At least one person has laughed. And she's not that easily 'tickled'.

So, I will always carry on and write. But now I feel that at least I might be following a path strewn with "Black-Eyed-Susans, honeybees, butterflies, and bunnies".

I don't know if anyone will read this, or will enjoy it. I hope so. While sharing bits of my youth, my worries, and my concern about certain ones of my 'stories', I actually had ideas for developing 'new' stories.

I am always amazed when writers say they are 'blocked'. I have only to open my eyes to see a world around me that no one else can envision. I listen to a song, and I'm in a different world, time, planet. A gift from Pawpaw, and Mother's DNA.

It is my oldest granddaughter's birthday this month, and I don't know what to give her for her birthday. But when she was younger, she always asked me to tell her a story. I think that I will pull out one of my OLD/ANCIENT tales that I wrote when her dad was her age and make it into a book for her.

p---leia aka Mamma KayeLee

7/19/2020

[slutforgoodliterature]

Bucky Barnes x Reader - Mischief Managed (barely)

Prompt: You and your boyfriend Bucky are sick of all the team meetings Steve keeps dragging you into. He finds a fun way to pass the time, and you are at the brunt of said fun. 

Warnings: vaginal fingering, public

“I refuse to believe Steve has called yet another team meeting.” You grumble. Bucky shakes his head at you, completely exasperated as well. 

“I know, Y/N, but we gotta go. Can’t let Cap down.” He sends you a small smile, reaching out a hand for you to grab so he can pull you off the bed, where you currently are curled up in a heap. “I mean if we don’t turn up, who is?” He tacks on, and you have to agree with him. 

As much as you love Steve, the guy can be a bit overbearing. 

Sighing, you allow your boyfriend to drag you off the bed. “Fine,” you huff, “but I want to make it clear I am going against my will.” He smirks at you and swiftly tickles the skin of your stomach that appears as you are pulling on a jumper. His jumper, to be exact.

Squealing, you grab his hand before yanking it behind his arm, twisting him into submission.  

“Ok, ok! No more tickling.” He chuckles, and you shove him hard as you let go just so he gets the message.

“Try it again, and you’re sleeping on the floor, Barnes.” You warn him. 

Tickles are not a game.

As you exit your room, he has to rotate his metal arm in his shoulder socket to put it back into place, and you feel a little guilty.

“Jeez, you really did a number on me in there, didn’t ya, doll?” He jokes. 

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to be so rough. I just hate tickling, you know that.” You apologise, gripping his hand tightly. He squeezes back. 

“I also know you like it rough, so no need to apologise, princess.” He murmurs back, his head ducked into your ear, and you blush hard. 

“Pipe down, soldier. We wouldn’t want you to embarrass yourself in front of all your friends.” You mumble back, but warmth is already pooling in your lower stomach.

“Mm, you’re right. We really wouldn’t want that.” He hums, but you can see there’s a mischevious glint in his eyes.

“Nuh-uh. I know that look.” You poke his chest playfully. “What are you up to?” You demand, drawing him to a stop just outside the door to the conference room, where all your fellow Avengers are waiting. 

He simply raises an eyebrow, looking at you innocently. “No idea what you’re on about, dollface.” 

You don’t believe him, not one bit, but you allow him to lead you into the room anyway.

You definitely should’ve known better.

“Bucky, Y/N. Glad to see you two could make it.” Steve nods at you both as you take seats at the far end of the table, next to Nat and across from Bruce and Sam, who has his feet propped up on the table and a hat tilted over his face. He is definitely asleep. 

Bucky sends his chair a kick from under the table, causing him to jerk awake with a yelp.

“Who did that?” He demands, scouring the room until he catches Bucky’s barely concealed snicker. 

“Watch it, Tin Man.” Sam threatens, to which Bucky rolls his eyes and crosses his arms over his chest menacingly, but you couldn’t help admire the way the fabric of his shirt stretched across his pecs. 

Did it get hotter in here, or is that just you? 

“Or what, Big Bird?”

Sam opens his mouth to retort but Steve butts in, shutting it down.

“Enough, you two!” He massages the bridge of his nose, looking every bit the tired mother he is. “If I wanted to babysit, I would’ve invited Queens.” Both Sam and Bucky shoot each other a final look before Bucky shifts his chair closer to you, facing away from Sam. 

“God, you’re gonna give the poor guy an aneurysm.” You whisper to Bucky, the two of you laughing quietly to each other as you watch Steve attempt to use the complicated technology of Stark Tower. 

“Either that or his pen is gonna snap.” Bucky points out the tight grip Steve has on a pen, that really does look like it’s in imminent danger, and you can’t help but giggle. 

“Barnes. Y/L/N. Shut up.” Tony’s voice rings out, sending you two a half-hearted glare. 

“Sorry, dad.” You smile back, ignoring Steves exasperated sigh. 

“Moving on...” He stresses, gesturing back to the blueprints of some Hydra facility you were planning on breaking into. 

You try to zone in, you really do, but all of a sudden Bucky’s hand is sliding up your thigh and omg is he serious right now?!

“Bucky!” You whisper hiss at him, gripping his metal wrist with your hand. “What the fuck are you playing at?”

“More like who.” He smirks as he whispers to you under his breath. He captures your intense gaze as his arm continues his way up your leg, the inhuman strength of his metal arm no match for you.

And let’s be honest, you aren’t exactly trying all that hard to stop him. 

“Eyes front, Barnes.” Steve orders, tearing Bucky’s gaze away from your flushed cheeks.

“Sir, yes sir.” He sends a mock salute to Steve, who rolls his eyes at his best friend. 

“Y/N, you all good down there?” Wanda asks, ever concerned. You’re about to tell her that yes, you are just dandy, when Bucky's hand cups your core. You suck in a harsh breath and have to stop yourself from nearly jumping out of your seat. 

“She’s fine, just ate some bad prawns at lunch,” Bucky reassures Wanda, who is stilling looking for you to reassure her. You nod at her, sending her a thankful smile, which finally puts her at ease and draws attention away from you and your conniving boyfriend. 

“Prawns?” You hiss, clenching your thighs together as his hand slowly rubs you through your gym leggings, which are very thin, mind you. 

“Shh,” he shushes you, “only you and I know that it wasn’t prawns you had in your mouth at lunch.” He smirks evilly at you before applying more pressure to his wandering hand.

A hell of a lot more pressure. Holy fuckkkk...

“You...you...sonuvabitch.” You swear under your breath, and all of a sudden you notice your hand is no longer pushing him away, but gripping his wrist tightly; pulling him closer. 

“Language, Cap might hear you.” He looks casually back up to Steve, who hasn’t noticed a damn thing. Neither has the rest of the table, for which you thank your lucky stars. “I’m sure he wouldn’t like to hear those words come out of such a pretty mouth. But I guess that mouth of yours can also-”

“Oh shut up, Barnes.” You groan, your eyes fluttering closed as his fingers begin paying special attention to a certain bundle of nerves. 

“You havin’ fun, princess?” His breath fans across your face. “You like having me touch you like that?”

“Bucky, I swear to god...” You curse, bringing everybody’s eyes back on you two. 

“Woah, Y/N, you really don’t look well,” Bruce says in a worried tone. Murmurs of agreement sound throughout the whole room. 

“You’re right, I am feeling kinda ill...” You agree, fanning your face for effect. Bucky rolls his eyes, which you catch out of the corner of your eye, and increases the speed and pressure of his fingers, making your eyes bulge. “I think I should go-” 

The knot in the pit of your stomach is building steadily, and you can feel an intense orgasm rushing towards you. 

“Can you just wait two more minutes, Y/N?” Tony asks, annoyed that you have yet again interrupted the meeting. “We’re almost done here. Unless you’re gonna spew of course, then, by all means, take it outside. I do not want you ruining my carpet.” 

“She’ll be fine. You can hold on a couple more minutes, can’t you, babe?” Bucky replies before you have the chance to, challenging you with his eyes. 

Always a sucker for a challenge, you find yourself nodding. 

“Yeah, of course. I’ll be fine.” You assure everyone, gesturing to Tony and Steve to continue with the plans. 

“Brilliant. So after Wanda and Vision intercept group C here...” Steves' voice trails off in your head as you are completely consumed by the sensations Bucky is causing you at the moment. 

“Fuck...Bucky, baby, I don’t know how much longer...” your breath is now coming out in harsh pants, your almost legs trembling with pleasure. His fingers continue working you, circling and tapping and overall just driving you absolutely insane. 

“You’re loving this, aren’t ya, doll? My filthy girl.” You can hear the smirk in his voice, how he loves that he can dissolve you into a panting, trembling mess with just his fingers. “I’m gonna make you cum, and I haven’t even touched you yet, not really.”

He began to push his fingers into your clit, hard, and keep them circling there. You let out a litany of swears under your breath. “So close, James. Fuck...” 

“Come on, princess. Let go. Cum for me in front of everyone.” His gruff voice sends you over the edge. 

As your orgasm crashes through you, you have to bite down on your knuckles to contain your moans. Bucky’s fingers continue their torturous pressure, rising you through the throes of pleasure until your body is twitching and your other hand scrabbles at his, attempting to push it away from you. 

“Jeez, what’s up with you, girly?” Sam asks, concerned, and you open your eyes to realise that everyone is staring at you and Bucky. You face is completely flushed and his hand is not-so-inconspicuously placed between your legs. 

Bucky seems to have also forgotten your audience, as his eyes slowly focus, coming out of a daze. He presses a quick kiss to your forehead and removes his hand, gripping your thigh softly, his thumb rubbing soothing circles. 

“Sorry, I just thought tickling her would make her feel better.” He covers smoothly, and squeezes your thigh, making your knee jump and hit the table as you let out a yelp. “Who would’ve thought she hates tickles that much, eh?” He smiles innocently at everyone, who seems to buy his lie with rolled eyes and snickers. 

“Well, we’re finished here, did you get all that?” Steve addresses everyone and receives a few ‘yes sirs’ here and there along with a couple of thumbs up. 

“We’re finished here as well, aren’t we, dollface?” Bucky whispers to you, drawing a tired smile from you. 

“Just you wait, Barnes. Karma’s a bitch.” You pat him playfully on the cheek before sashaying out of the room, feeling his eyes burn into you as you swayed your hips teasingly. 

You couldn’t wait to get him back for that. 

[criminalhotch]

Both Teams~An Ethan Dolan Imagine

Hey, can you do an Ethan smut where he is best friend with a lesbian? She is in a relationship with a bisexual girl that has a crush on him sooo she ends up asking her best friend to have a threesome with her and her girlfriend. Base idea is Ethan having a threesome with 2 girls 😂

A/N: So that was the request but I ended up mixing them up and Ethan is friends with a girl who is bisexual and I think the way I wrote it may be less stereotypical especially after I had someone say something about it. On the other hand, a lot of you voted for this so I hope you like it. Again I do not mean to offend anyone. This is fictional therefore it is fake and only written for entertainment purposes. 

A/N: Also shout out to @rockstardolan  for making sure this didn’t suck but this is nowhere on Peaches level so sorry to disappoint.

Warnings: Smut, MFF Threesome, swearing, coming out 

Word Count: 3,258

Ethan Dolan has been my best friend for almost three years now. He and Grayson were both very sweet and accepting people. I hid something from both of them for a long time. Something very important yet personal about me. It was only a year ago when they became friends with James and that is when I realized they would still love me for me. A little over a year ago I told them that I was bisexual. I mostly dated guys but girls tended to catch my eye more than I originally thought. Being bisexual was hard. You were always told that you were wrong or a whore that couldn’t pick which team to play for.

It was right before they went home for Thanksgiving in 2017. I decided to tell Grayson first because we weren’t as close as Ethan and I were. Ethan was caught up playing some boring video game so I pulled Grayson to the side. “Hey, G?” I asked. “Yeah?” he replied. “Can we sit down and talk about something?” I asked sincerely. “Of course but can I ask why you aren’t going to E?” he asked. “It’s complicated” I answered simply. “You like him don’t you?” he asked. “No, you ass clown. It’s something I need to tell you both individually” I explained and he nodded then sat down. “So you and E know that I have had some boyfriends over the last couple years” I started. “Most of them being deadbeats but yeah, go on,” Grayson said. “What you don’t know is that I have talked or dated girls in the past but I never told you guys. I was scared of what you would think or say” I explained. “So you’re bi?” Grayson asked. “Yes,” I answered. “I don’t care who or what they are, just know E and I will kick their ass if they hurt you, you know that right?” Gray asked. I laughed and then I nodded. He wrapped me in a warm Grayson bear hug. Soon enough I pulled away and he looked down to me. “Why did you think we wouldn’t accept you? You’re our best friend and we are also friends with James” he said. “I know, I’m scared when I tell anyone no matter who it is but I should’ve told you guys sooner. I should’ve known that you would love me either way” I admitted. “You should’ve but I’m glad you’re telling us now. Like I said E and I are always going to protect you no matter who you introduce us to so keep that in mind, Y/N” Gray explained. “I know, Gray, I know” I laughed as I hugged him. “You should go tell Ethan now” he urged. “I will, I’m more worried about this one” I admitted. “He’s still going to be your best friend,” Gray said. “Yeah, but he’s going to have a lot more questions,” I said. “You’re right,” Grayson said as I started heading to Ethan’s room. Well here goes nothing.

“Hey, E? You busy?” I asked. “Not really, what’s up?” he replied. “So I just told Grayson this and don’t be mad I told him first. I saved you for last because I know it’s going to be a deeper conversation” I explained. “Ok?” he said as more of a question. “You know that I am attracted to men but what you don’t know is-” I said as he interrupted me. “You like girls too?” “How did you know?” I asked. “I’m your best friend, I watch your every move. I see when you check a guy out and I especially see when you check a girl out. You always comment on how pretty girls are on Instagram but you very rarely say a whole lot about guys. I knew you weren’t straight but I wanted you to be comfortable with telling me” he explained. I engulfed him in a hug and began crying almost immediately. “I love you, E” I sniffled. “I love you too, Y/N” E said. “How long have you known?” I asked. “I could ask you the same thing” he sassed back. “I’ve known since way before we were friends but I didn’t want anything to change between us” I explained. “No matter when you told us nothing would’ve changed but I started figuring it about a year ago” Ethan answered. “You never said anything to Grayson?” I asked. “No, it wasn’t my business to tell and on the off chance I was wrong I didn’t want it to turn into chaos,” he said. “You really know me better than I know myself, Grant,” I said using his middle name as a nickname. “Damn straight,” he said. “Maybe it’s time I change it to damn, bisexual?” he joked. “I fucking hate you” I groaned while rolling my eyes. “No, you don’t. Now can I kick your ass at Mario Kart?” he asked. “Oh, it’s on Dolan. Where’s your brother? I need to kick both of your asses” I said as I yelled for Grayson and we all began playing Mario Kart.

Ever since that day I knew I could trust both of them with anything I sent their way especially Ethan. There would be days we would just hang out and talk about what girls we thought were pretty or if these guys were worth my time or just fuck boys. Being in LA for so long Ethan had learned a lot. One day I found a girl on Tinder, her name was Hannah. I swiped right and then we matched instantly. I became so excited and Ethan was excited for me as well. We talked for a month before we went on a date. We went on quite a few dates before she asked me to be her girlfriend but today the twins are meeting my girlfriend and I am a little nervous.

“So when is Hannah going to be here?” Ethan asked. “In an hour, E,” I answered. “So is she bi too?” Gray asked. “No, she only likes girls” I replied. “Well try not to make out with her in front of Gray he may get a boner” Ethan joked. “Fuck off, E,” Grayson said as he cheeks grew red. “Gray maybe you should stick to searching boobies on the internet” I joked as he groaned. “I’m never going to live that down am I?” he sighed as he pulled his hand through his hair and I shook my head no.

An hour later Hannah showed up. “Let me answer the door before you two scare her off” I suggested. I opened the door to see Hannah standing there. “Hey” I smiled. We hugged then I turned to the twins. “So you may mix them up for a bit but the one with the dangly earring and bigger muscles is Grayson and the one with the darker hair and dopey look on his face is Ethan,” I said pointing to each of the twins. “My face is not dopey” Ethan pouted. “I said dopey-looking” I corrected and Hannah laughed. “I’m glad she laughs at your jokes” Ethan sulked. “Well, it was funny” Hannah shrugged. “So I am going to just get right to it and say that even though you’re the first girlfriend Y/N has ever introduced us to we will still kick your ass if you hurt her,” Ethan said. “ETHAN GRANT!” I scolded. “No, it’s fine. I don’t plan on hurting you so we have nothing to worry about” Hannah said as she kissed me once. “So you’re probably pretty good at giving head huh?” Gray asked. “GRAY!” I shouted. “I don’t know, ask Y/N” Hannah smirked as Grayson screamed. “AHHHH FORGET I ASKED” Gray yelled as he ran into the other room. “I’m so sorry they are being weird” I apologized. “Oh no, it’s fine. It’s all very amusing” Hannah admitted.

This was all about 8 months ago. Hannah and I are still together. We hang out with the twins often and we all get along pretty well. Hannah and I’s sex life was pretty good but the other day I wondered if there was a possibility of us having a threesome. “Babe?” I asked as she walked into her kitchen while I made some breakfast. “Yes?” she replied. “What would you think of a threesome? It’s always kind of been on my bucket list” I asked. “I’ve never really thought of it, I guess it depends,” she said. “Depends on what?” I asked. “Well male or female?” she pondered. “Which would you be more comfortable with?” I questioned. “Honestly I think it would be hot to see how a guy can pleasure you differently than I can” she answered. “So a male?” “I mean which did you want?” she asked. “I just wanted to know if you’d be interested and it sure seems like you are” I admitted. “It seems like fun. Do you have anyone in mind?” she asked. “Not really” I replied. “What about Grayson?” she asked. “Oh god, no. I couldn’t. He’s too sweet, we’d ruin his innocence” I responded. “Ok, then Ethan?” she suggested. “I don’t know. I’ve never thought of E that way” I answered honestly. “Even better” she shrugged. “I’ll ask him tonight when we all hang out if you want me to,” I said. “If that’s what you want to do,” Hannah said.

That night we were at the twins’ house. Grayson had left with Bryant to go get us food and Hannah had fallen asleep on the couch. “E can I ask you something in the kitchen?” “Um sure,” he said hesitantly. “So Hannah and I were talking about our-um sex life. Which it’s good and all, no worries there but I asked if she’d be interested in a threesome and she thought it would be interesting seeing how a guy can pleasure me differently than she can” I rambled. “What’s your point Y/N?” he asked. “Well she suggested Grayson and I shot that down. Then she suggested you because we both know and trust you so IwaswonderingifyouwantedtohaveathreesomewithmygirlfriendandI” I said in one breath.  I looked at Ethan as he wore a huge smirk on his face. “I cannot believe you are asking me for a threesome” he taunted. “Yes or no, Ethan?” I asked, my voice filled with annoyance. “Oh, fuck yeah. I’m totally up for that. I’ve always been curious about what makes you squirm” Ethan growled. “Don’t start, Grant” I warned as he laughed it off.

----

Hannah and I were hanging out at my house when she started toying with my shorts. “Don’t, E’s on his way” I warned. “Who cares, we can have that threesome? Isn’t that what you want?” she purred. Oh, I can not handle all of this. Before I knew it she was on top of me, kissing me roughly. Her hips grinding into mine. I was so focused on her actions I didn’t notice Ethan’s arrival. He stood there in shock, his dick already hard from watching us make out. “Two girls making out too much for your little dick to handle?” I teased. “You won’t think it’s so little when I’m blowing your back out in a little bit” he winked. “Ethan why don’t you just sit and watch for a minute seems how you seem to be doing pretty good at that already” Hannah instructed as Ethan nodded. He sat in the chair across from my bed. I ripped my shirt off and threw it across the room. Then Hannah slipped my shorts down my thighs. She trailed kisses up my legs, dragging her lips slowly, inch by inch, teasing me. She placed a single kiss to my clothed clit before running my panties down my legs then flinging them at Ethan. She immediately attached her lips to my clit making me moan loudly at the sudden contact. She continued to suck and nibble on my clit. She then entered one of her petite fingers inside of me. “Fuck” I hissed. I began grinding my hips on to her nimble fingers yearning for more pleasure. “Stop or I’ll stop what I am doing then I’ll make Ethan go home” she growled. I whined as she continued moving her finger in out of me as she relocated her tongue to my pussy lapping up the juices already spilling out of me. I looked at Ethan and he looked painfully hard. Like he could bust just watching us, which he probably could.

Soon enough Hannah stopped everything and I whined at the loss of contact. “I think it’s Ethan’s turn to pleasure you while I ride your pretty little face” Hannah suggested looking towards Ethan as his eyes lit up. He sauntered over to me. “You sure about this?” he asked. “Hurry before I change my mind” I joked. Hannah slowly lowered herself onto my face so I began kitten licking at her clit as I anticipated Ethan’s touch. Before I knew it he had two fingers pounding in and out of me making my body jerk. “So responsive with just a couple of fingers, just imagine what it’s like when it’s my dick pounding into you mercilessly” he teased and I groaned into Hannah’s folds making her moan on top of me. “You guys have no idea how hot this is” Ethan groaned right before he licked up my folds making me moan once more. “Fuck, E” I moaned. Hannah climbed off of me as she strode across the room. She sat in the chair putting her legs on either side of the armrests. She began rubbing her clit. She was teasing me because she knew there was nothing I could about it. “You think you can handle a third finger?” E teased. “Oh I know she can” Hannah spoke up while smirking. Ethan entered a third finger inside of me. “How much longer is this going to last?” Ethan asked. “I want to see Ethan make Y/N cum with just your mouth and fingers” Hannah admitted. “Don’t have to tell me twice” Ethan smirked as he dove right back into my pussy. Slamming his fingers in and out of me, his tongue lapping up and down my folds, and the slight scruff on his face rubbing my thighs. Every time I managed to look up Hannah was toying with herself only making things worse for me. I started to feel my walls contract around Ethan’s fingers and I knew I was close. “Fuck, E” I moaned. “She’s close” Hannah added. “I can tell, she’s tightening around me like she’s never been fingered before” Ethan added cockily. “Fuck you both” I groaned. “Kind of the whole reason we’re here” Ethan smirked. His pace picked up once again. “C’mon, cum for me. Cum around my fingers. Who is making you feel this good?” Ethan egged me on.”Oh fuck, E-E. Ethan” I screamed as I came around his fingers. His face down by my thighs lapping up the juices flowing out of me. “Damn, Y/N. Who knew how good you taste” Ethan said. “Oh, I do. Sweet as a peach, huh, E?” Hannah said walking back across the room running her hands through Ethan’s hair tugging loosely at his dark strands. “Tonight’s all about you, Y/N. So I’m going to go back over there and let Ethan fuck you senseless but first off pretty boy needs to put a condom on, we don’t need any little ones running around here” Hannah finished explaining as she walked back over to the chair. “Face down, ass up. I’m here to blow your back out with my quote ‘little dick’” Ethan teased. He ran his tip up and down my folds teasing me. “Please, E” I begged. “Look at you begging for me” he taunted and I rolled my eyes at his snarky comment. “You ready for me?” Ethan asked. “Yes, fuck me, Ethan, please” I begged. “Your wish is my command princess,” he said ramming himself in and out of me without any warning and not letting me adapt to his size. “Oh my god, E” I moaned as his speed never slowed.His hands attached to my hips for stability. All of a sudden he pulled all the way out of me as I sighed from the emptiness that accompanied me. “Smack her ass” Hannah added. I groaned at the thought. Ethan slammed back into me and added a harsh slap to my ass causing me to clench around his cock. “She’s like a little whore, wrap your hand around her throat” Hannah requested. I could feel Ethan smirk from behind me. He reached around causing his dick to go even deeper inside of me. I felt his hand wrap around my throat restricting my airway just enough. “F-f-fuck, E” I muttered out in between breaths. “K-keep going” I begged. “As you please” he said going even deeper which I didn’t think was possible. “E, I’m so close” I gurgled out. “Hmm, why doesn’t your girlfriend come over here and rub your clit while I fuck you senselessly so we both make you cum, huh? How does that sound, little one?” Ethan asked. “Fuck, yes. Please. Hannah” I groaned. I heard her footsteps then shortly after felt her soft fingertips on my clit and her lips pressing gentle kisses to my body. I could feel my orgasm approaching but it felt different than it usually does. “Oh, fuck” I said as Ethan repeatedly hit my g-spot. I could feel myself clenching around him with every stroke. “You’re close Y/N. C’mon, cum for me. Cum for us” Ethan begged. “C’mon, babe. Show us how we made you feel tonight” Hannah said. That’s all it took for my orgasm to wash over me but it was more than that. An urgent rush washed over me too. Ethan nor Hannah ever stopped what they were doing until they knew I had finished. “Who knew my best friend was a squirter” Ethan smirked as he pulled out and admired his handy work. “Oh my god” I groaned. “Damn, babe. Now, why don’t you suck Ethan off so that he gets to cum too” Hannah suggested. I looked at Ethan who was still supporting an aching hard-on. “You want me to fix that for you?” I asked gesturing to his dick. “Uh could you?” he asked. I went down to my knees. I knew he couldn’t be that far from the edge because we had done so much. I sucked at his tip gently which made him groan. “Fuck Y/N” he moaned as I took more and more of him in my mouth and hollowing my cheeks. I reached down and gently massaged his balls in my hand. I could feel his tip hit the back of my throat causing me to gag slightly around him. Every time I gagged around him he would moan at the contact. “Oh fuck, Y/N. Keep going, I’m close” Ethan groaned as I began bobbing my head faster. “Oh shit, Y/N” he moaned as his cum spurted down my throat. “This was a lot of fun,” Ethan said as he began putting his underwear back on. “Yeah, I’d have to agree with you on that,” I said. “You know, we could make this a frequent thing” Ethan suggested. “Oh, hell no. You can leave now, E. We will see you later” Hannah said shooing him out of the room. Well, I definitely think that playing for both teams is the best thing that’s ever happened to me especially after tonight.

[ginnyzero]

Retelling Old Stories

I've written a book based on old fairy tales and legends and am currently reviewing the Shrek movies in Action Movie Friday. (Shrek 2 post coming next, I hope.) I thought I'd talk about retelling fairy tales, myths and legends.

Myths, fairytales, legends, these are the stories that are near and dear to our hearts. And let's face it, they're familiar, comforting and popular. Fairy tales such as The Sleeping Princess, The Little Mermaid and Beauty and the Beast have been told over and over to young children for generations. These stories are oral traditions passed down from generation to generation and have strayed quite a bit from their horrific and sexist roots. So much, that outside of a few key points their original creators may not recognize them anymore.

These oral traditions form the basis of the hero's journey which can be found in high fantasy stories such as Lord of the Rings and Science Fiction stories, such as Star Wars. They've been satirized (Ella Enchanted, the movie), parodied (Shrek) and outright made fun of (Mirror, Mirror) and also taken far too seriously (Snow White & The Huntsman.) Just as much as they've been played straight (see the Elemental Master Series of Mercedes Lackey.) And they've been mixed together until almost unrecognizable. (The Princess & The Frog, Frozen, Once Upon a Time, the 500 Kingdoms also by Mercedes Lackey.)

The great thing about fairy tales and myths and legends is that they have a very low risk level. People are far more likely to pick up something to read of watch that is relatively familiar to them and that they know they already enjoy rather than a brand new concept they don't understand and aren't sure they'll like. Fairy tales are comfort food. People know they like them. And given a choice between a concept they aren't sure of and a fairy tale based media, they're more than likely to choose a fairy tale based media.

So, how do you go about retelling these fairy tales and making them fresh and new for your audience? This was a question I (sort of) asked myself when I started to write the Dawn Warrior. (Available in Ebook & Paperback.) How do I take Sleeping Beauty and make her different without relying on, say, what we know of her through Disney or from Grimm, not the TV Show. (Which honestly, isn't much in either case.) And make them partly relevant without losing making a good story?

Change the Roles:

What if the Princess really isn't the Princess? What if she's the bodyguard in disguise that's protecting the real princess from assassins? (The Decoy Princess, Dawn Cook) What if the Princess is also a spy? (The Princess Series Jim C. Hines) Maybe Prince Charming is actually an actor!

I mean, come on, in real life unless your Prince William and Harry and work for the British Royal Navy, royals don't really have adventures. (I wouldn't want to get on the bad side of Queen Elizabeth either.)

Or, maybe the Princess and Prince aren't really the good guys after all. Maybe it's the Big Bad Wolf or the evil stepmother or even the sea witch. (Confessions of an Ugly Stepsister, Gregory Maguire) Or, to borrow from Hoodwinked, the Big Bad Wolf is really an investigative reporter trying to do an expose on Red Riding Hood. (I mean, she can't be all that sweet and innocent.)

A good example of this was a recent Sleeping Beauty movie that was in the horror genre. (Unfortunately I heard it was a really bad horror movie.) The Sleeping Beauty in the movie was supposed to be the damsel in distress and ended up being both the trap and the villain.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xdEo_t-iVbM

(I'll just leave this here.)

Change the Setting:

Fairy tales in SPACE!!! (Lunar Chronicles, Marissa Meyer) Okay, there aren't a lot of fairy tales in space. I think I saw another example on instafreebie the other day. In fact, there aren't many romances in space either. (I was listening to a podcast about an indie author who was doing this and she was the first writing romances set in the backdrops of aliens?) But, this is like Star Wars. Greek Myths in SPACE!!!! (Seriously, Star Wars is built around the classical hero's journey. The franchise even freely admits it in their authorized literature. I've got a book by Bantam called Star Wars: The Magic of Myth that goes through it step by step.)

This is one of the easier ways to make fairy tales seem more relevant and seems to be currently the most popular. Grimm the TV Show, Once Upon a Time (in Wonderland), The Harry Dresden Files, and Fables, all take fairy tales and legends and drop them into the middle of the modern world. I include Harry Dresden, not because he's playing out a fairy tale so to speak, but he's some sort of misguided Prince Charming type on his own hero's journey. The book Charming by James  Eliot, takes the character of "Prince Charming" plays it straight, and makes it a bloodline that is involved in some sort of knighthood charged with keeping the mundane world safe from the evil things that go bump in the night set in modern times.

Mercedes Lackey took a slightly different approach with her Elemental Masters series. She took fairy tales, played them straight, but set them in Edwardian times right up through the First World War. By doing so, she was able to show how the beginnings of the modern world like industrialization and rail roads and wars fought with machine guns instead of swords were effecting the world of magic and the magical creatures. (For instance, all the pollution made it easier for evil or nasty type elementals and creatures to thrive and good elementals and creatures that couldn't abide cold iron were dying off or going into hiding.)

Change the Genders:

Let's face it. Fairy tales are pretty sexist, no matter what your gender is. I had in the first draft of the Dawn Princess an entire rant by Roxana, who is a 'Beauty Asleep' about the differences between how a female Princess who is cursed to sleep and a male Prince is cursed to sleep and how neither tale does royalty any justice whatsoever.(Seriously, in the male version, when the Princess who had been sitting by his bedside took a nap, the clock should have reset, the Prince shouldn't still have sneezed and been woken by the maid.)

Maybe it's really Prince Charming asleep in the Castle and well, Beauty has to belt on her sword and gird her courage to get through the hedge and kill the dragon. Or, the tower bound male Rapunzel is intruded upon by a Pirate Princess who is looking for gold, not love. Maybe it isn't a brave little tailor but a brave seamstress! Or it is a male who is captured by a bunch of cannibalistic female bandits.

...

Okay, there is taking some things too far. (That story is terrible no matter what.)

Apply some Common Sense:

In fairy tales, things don't always make sense. I read them and go "why? why would they do that?" A lot of times Princes don't get punished for their ill deeds. Another Prince comes along, "saves" them and they go about their adventures without showing any sort of remorse for what they did in the first place. Princes don't become goose boys or shepherds or kitchen tweenies.(Or at least, not very often, I think Faithful John/Hans is about the only one I can think of.)

No, those punishments are reserved for Princesses who have been tricked into changing places with their maids and end up being goose girls or in the kitchen. (I can think of half a dozen variations of that tale.) And the Princess, instead of finding a nice baker or farmer to settle down with who appreciates her, instead figures out how to reveal her plight to the Prince who actually married her uppity maid/sister and seems happy with the maid/sister and once the maid/sister is out of the way, marries the Prince. (The Prince was tricked, happy to be tricked and the Princess took him anyways? That makes no sense.)

A really good example of this is the original and horrific Beauty Asleep tale. In the original tale, the King comes upon Beauty Asleep in her tower and rapes her, while she's asleep, repeatedly. In fact, he gets her pregnant with twins. The babes are born and he doesn't even take them with him! No. He leaves them with their sleeping mother. One of the babes gets hungry, as babies do! And sucks the thorn out of her finger that was keeping her asleep. Beauty wakes up. The Queen finds out about her existence. Tries to kill her. The King kills the Queen in turn and ends up marrying Beauty and bringing her and his twins to the castle.

Just what the ever loving hell?

It's good to be king?

No, really, the Queen should have taken Beauty's side. They could have killed the King for being an adulterer and ruled the kingdom together setting up the twins as the heirs. Female solidarity. Because the story as written is insane.

There's a post wandering about tumblr about swan maidens and selkies. And how awful the stories are about the men who take the swan maiden's cloaks and the selkies' skins to force these women to be their brides. One of the reblogs adds the caveat that it feels like these stories don't take into account the actual nature of swans and seals. Swans are pretty. They look graceful.

Swans are mean, they hiss, they bite, they're incredibly aggressive and they can break bones. Approach with caution. Don't try to steal from them. Don't try to pet them. Aggressive swan is aggressive. Okay. Anyone who steals a swan maiden's cloak deserves the punch in the face!

And seals, seals aren't all that nice either! Zefrank1 hasn't done a true facts about seals, but maybe he should. Male seals are called bulls for a reason! Elephant Seal bulls charge at each other when they fight. Leopard Seals are considered one of the ocean's more dangerous predators and take on whales and sharks. Seals train well to do tricks. Look,  just, don't mess with them because not only are they cute and have sharp teeth and claws, they're smart. Do you really want to mess with the woman who can steal all your nets and drive the fish away and beat you to a bloody pulp? Seal fights involve mud wrestling.

Add some reality to the stories. Give the actions of those involved real consequences. Change the personalities to actually reflect the animals they are sharing their bodies with.

Mash things together:

This is another popular tactic and TV Tropes calls it the "Fractured" Fairy Tale. Think how in Once Upon a Time, (spoiler alert) Rumpelstiltskin is also the Beast of Beauty and the  Beast and his father is Peter Pan. And he's the grandfather of the Truest Believer and thus the "father in law" of Emma Swan the daughter of Snow White and Prince Charming. And that barely dips a toe into the confusing of Once Upon a Time Family relationships.

Mercedes Lackey also did a version of mixing up of fairy tales in her 500 Kingdoms. In the 500 Kingdoms, The Tradition is a form of magic that ties to make fairy tales happen no matter what type of tale they are and no matter if all the pieces are actually 100% correct. Fairy Godmothers are there to steer the tradition so that disaster doesn't strike constantly. (Because what if the Prince of the Cinderella tale was actually a Princess or well, a Prince who was too young, too old, or just liked other Princes.)

Fables does this as well. Prince Charming is the same Prince across Snow White, Sleeping Beauty and Cinderella. Sleeping Beauty ends up marrying the Beast in her second marriage. (Prince Charming is good at wooing, not staying.) The Gingerbread witch of Hansel and Gretel ends up being the witch who puts most of the tales in action across the Enchanted Forest. The last arc I read, Rose Red was making her own version of Camelot (and there was much trepidation about how that was going to turn out, probably badly.)

Grab a bunch of different stories that seem to work well together, stitch them together in a way that makes sense or seems fun. It's okay not to always tell the exact same tale.

Add Real People's stories:

Look, if you're going for a more empowered woman in your stories. There are plenty of women in history that were actually pretty awesome. And I'm not just talking about Esther from the Bible or Rahab. (Both pretty awesome ladies.) There were female pirates and female queens who outwitted and beat their male counterparts to be on the throne and to keep themselves out of jail. There are female scientists, female snipers and well, I'm sure if you look hard enough you can find something a woman did in real life that men get praised for more often.

In fact, one person go so fed up with the way fairy tale princesses are praised at places such as Disney, they created a site/book for girls about such heroines at Rejectedprincesses.com.

Youtube has videos labelled things like Top Ten Badass women from History you probably don't know about. (But if you'd read Rejected Princesses you actually might!)

So, don't be afraid to use some real world inspiration to give you ideas about how awesome your female characters can be.

And these are just a few ideas on how to take something old and make it something "new."

In the Dawn Warrior, I took a bunch of these. I applied some common sense. Changed the Princess' role. And really mashed some things together. But, I kept a medieval fairy tale like setting because I wanted to keep this series different from my other series, Heaven's Heathens MC, which is a light science fantasy that could read urban fantasy if you squint at it. (Or maybe it's the other way around.) Two series set in the modern/future world seemed a bit silly to me.

Mostly, my advice is if you want to retell a fairy tale or myth or legend, have fun with it. Take your ingredients, mix them up as needed and don't sacrifice your story for message. (Because really, that gets old very quickly.)

Whelp, now if you like fairy tales there are plenty of pieces of media in this post to check out. Happy reading/watching/researching!

[uglypastels]

Hi! I was wondering if you could do a ✏️ for me please? I love preforming arts yet I hate to do public speaking and everything like that (if that makes any sense). I guess you can title it “Why” but if you want to change it that’s totally fine just make a note that it was originally called Why please. THANK YOU SO MUCH!

+ Oh and for the character for Why, could it be Peter or Tom please? Thank you!

Okay, this is probably the last thing anyone with a normal mind would think of when given this title, but I am far from normal (as I hope anyone knows by now) so here it is. I hope it makes sense. 😅

probably should warn - some mention of smut… but just a little. 

Why // Tom Holland 

“Why.” (Y/N) groaned. Tom watched his girlfriend walk here and fro around the room. Her arms crossed, holding herself tightly.

“Why what, love?” he had been enjoying a large coffee before she got up out of nowhere and started to walk across from one side of the dressing room to the other. She stopped abruptly, looking him up and down as he was still sitting quite relaxed on the large sofa. Her teeth grazed her lip before she explained: “Why did I agree to do this? What was I thinking to agree to this, Tom? I can’t do it. Nope. I can’t! I-I’ll just leave through the back door.” Her legs started to move again and she was headed for the door. Tom gut up and caught her by the waist, embracing her tightly. Not making it possible for her to escape.

“Sorry, love. Unfortunately, I can’t let you do that.” He placed a gentle kiss on her shoulder. Then another one on her neck, before brushing his lips against her cheek. This usually calmed her down, brought her back to her senses, but today was not usual. Her shoulders tensed every time he touched her and her arms were resisting his hold.

“Tom. I’m serious. Let me go.” He did as she wanted. Scared that he was hurting her somehow.

“I’m sorry, love, but why the sudden change of heart, I thought you said it was going to be fun.” He tried to sound enthusiastic, alongside a big smile. He reached out for her hand and was glad to see she didn’t pull away at the touch.

“I don’t know it’s just anxiety, I guess.” she bit her lip again and Tom could swear that there was nothing hotter than that. He just wanted to kiss her right then but had to hold it together. She was stressed and if a hug was already bothering her, then he didn’t want to overstep any boundaries with the kiss.

“Why are you nervous, love? There’s nothing worth the stress about.” He reached out for her other hand and pulled her closer to him. She scoffed through a smile.

“Maybe for you. I, however, am not exactly used to snogging someone in front of millions of people.”

“First of all, you’re not going to be snogging just anyone, but me. Secondly, not millions of people.” she raised an eyebrow at him, “okay, fine, like two mil at the most. But c’mon, it’s just one snog on camera. Nothing we haven’t done before - minus the camera, then.” he cocked an eyebrow at her.

“Why do you even want to do this. I mean, as sexy as it will be, it’s not really you, is it?”

“You mean that I am not sexy?” he smirked. Pulling her even closer, so they were chest to chest and pressed a  light kiss against the corner of her mouth.

“Oh you are, definitely. It’s just usually on tv, you’re so cute and sweet. Not- whatever it is that you want to do in a moment when they knock on that door.” She let go of his one hand to point back at the door. He looked at it. The blue door fitted well with the rest of the room. It must be another five minutes before that knock would be heard and Tom would have to open it, just to be greeted with a camera in his face that pretended to be James Corden.

“I don’t know why. I just thought it would be different. As you said, everyone always portrays me as this goofy bloke that can’t properly walk, so let them see some range.” He looked into her eyes, she looked more relaxed the more he talked. “Besides, it will drive the fans crazy. Harrison will never be able to get them back into his lane.” She hid her face in his chest at the comment as she started to laugh hysterically. Tom absolutely adored that laugh. He could listen to it all day and never get bored.

“Why is this even a thing between you two? It’s ridiculous.”

“I know, it’s just a stupid joke. Especially that there is only one girl that I need in my lane.” he nudged his forehead against hers until their noses were touching slightly.

“Oh yeah, I’m sure Jennifer Aniston is all yours.” she joked.

“You know what,” he pulled away from their little cute moment, “anytime you mention her, I regret ever telling you.”

“Oh c’mon, it’s cute and I get it. If I was a hormonal teenage boy, I would also be totally crushing on Rachel Green.” she stuck her tongue out mockingly. Tom wanted to respond but there was a knock on the door. They both knew what was supposed to happen. Without another word, (Y/N) pressed herself against him, crashing their lips together. Tom thought he was going to melt right there.

Her hand went up to his hair, brushing through it, getting it all messed up. Just like he knew she loved. Tom lead her towards the door. The kiss continued and (Y/N)’s hand, the one that wasn’t tugging at his curls, undid the first button of his shirt. Tom smirked at the addition to their little scene.

There was a second knock on the door and Tom knew he had to open it now. Still kissing (Y/N), he searched for the handle and pushed it down, the door opened. Tom did everything in his power to continue the kiss, but clearly (Y/N) had more control over herself than he did. The moment the door was open wide enough that the camera in front of it had a proper shot of what was going on between them, she pulled away. The hand that was so casual in his hair lovingly traced down his arm as she walked away from him, disappearing from the camera view, but still just visible for Tom.

He did his best to concentrate on what was going on in front of him, he smiled casually at the camera as if he had not just made out with his girlfriend in front of the whole world to see. Next, to the large camera, there was a smaller screen on which he could see James. He was clearly flustered by what he just witnessed. Fanning himself with his cue cards.

“You’re alright mate?” Tom smiled at the camera, glancing at (Y/N), who was standing right next to him. Close, but just a bit too far too touch. He buttoned up his shirt again.

“Wow,” James laughed nervously, “I did… I did not expect that.” The hosts’ hands went to his hips as he just looked in front of him, a bit shocked. Tom chuckled,  leaned against the doorframe and put his own hand through his hair, trying to restore the damage.

“Yeah, sorry. Got a bit carried away there.” He looked back inside. (Y/N) was still standing there. She blew him a kiss and Tom couldn’t help it but wink at her. From the screen next to the camera, he heard a high pitched gasp.

“If you could keep it PG, Tom. Thanks, that would be great.”

“You got it, mate.” He smiled. Then he felt her cold fingers against his. He looked down. She was still out of shot, just her arm showing to the camera. He looked back up. “Is that all? It’s just that I-we were kind of in the middle of something.”

.” A gasp of shock left James. Still confused at what was actually going on, he looked at his audience: “Tom Holland everyone!” There were some second-hand cheers that he could hear. With his free hand, Tom did his signature peace sign, then pulled (Y/N) back to him and as the people continued to cheer on, pressed their lips together and closed the door.  Their kiss lasted for what Tom hoped was forever until they pulled apart to catch a breath.

“Oh, I just can’t wait to get this done with and go back to the hotel, babe.” He smirked.

“Why?” she asked oh-so-innocently.

“Because,” he kissed her lips quickly, but passionately, “we aren’t done with this little act just yet.”

The End 

> follower celebration 

> masterlist 

[retro-melanin]

The Night Me and Your Mama Met

ayyyye what up? I haven’t written in a while but the groupchat inspired me so here y’all go. Disclaimer: sorry the exposition is so long and it’s basically Awaken My Love propaganda, but also I’m not because that album slaps lmaoooo. also I wrote the first part of this when I was high and I’m majorly sleep deprived so sorry if it gets rambley/ doesn’t make sense in some places but I wanted to get this up!

Plot: You and Chadwick smoke together which leads to sexy times. Slight Dom!Chadwick

Word count: 2485

Warnings: recreational drug use (weed), so much smut, dirty talk, sliiight choking kink, and swearing of course

You and Chadwick were entangled together on your plush bed. Your head, laying on his bare chest while he gently scrunched his fingers through your tightly coiled curls. The clock read 2 a.m. but neither one of you could sleep. Chadwick had turned on the lights but kept them dim so the room had a deep honey glow. You scrolled through your phone to find the right song for the moment. Your finger stopped right above a certain album--you couldn’t help but to rekindle a disagreement you two kept having.

“I’m telling you ‘Awaken My Love’ is a masterpiece, and everyone slept on it because it’s different from Gambino’s rap albums,” you argued.

“Nah nothing compares to classic Gambino. Bonfire? 3005? Freaks and Geeks? Come on now,” Chadwick stated as if he’d just ended your debate.

“How you gon’ play James Brown and NOT acknowledge the GENIUS homage to the 70s era Gambino made,” you retorted. You were feeling stubborn tonight, and you weren’t going to let him win.

“Baby, believe me I see what he was tryna do….it just wasn’t good,” he said with a sleepy sigh.

“Oh I know you didn’t,” you gasped and sat up.

“Drop it babe, we were chilling,” he rolled his eyes, and tried to pull you back to him.

“Wait. Oh my god I get it now! You haven’t listened to it high,” you exclaimed.

“(Y/N), you know I ain’t smoked since...damn I was probably still in my thirties!” Chadwick laughed, “Where you goin’?”

You’d hoped off the bed and went over to your dresser. You pulled out the top drawer and rummaged around until you found what you were looking for.

“Ah ha! Can you roll?” you asked pulling a small box out from the drawer.

“I thought you said that box was for valuables?” Chadwick said with a sly grin

“And it is! I have my grandmother’s ring, keys to the safe, and my weed,” you explained.

Chadwick cracked up. Had he known you smoked, you two would have a while ago. The topic have never come up in conversation because you both assumed the other didn’t. You pulled out a mason jar full of your favorite strain, a grinder, a lighter, and some classic swisher sweets. Chad’s eyes widened at how prepared you were.

“Damn, I see you be havin’ all the fun without me!” he said through his giggles.

“I didn’t think you smoked! I’m sorry!” you laughed as well.

You started grinding up enough for a blunt, and you handed the swishers to Chadwick. When his laughing fit finally subsided, he broke down the rollo with his long, deft fingers. He emptied the contents into the trash can beside your bed.

“Aight I’ll make you a deal,” he started, “if we smoke and I suddenly love the album, you can sit on my face. If my feelings don’t change, then I get to slide in them guts.”

“Sounds like a win win to me,” you retorted.

He took the top off the grinder and began filling the blunt. He brought it to his lips, and made eye contact as he sealed it between his perfect pout.

“So is that a deal?” he murmured taking the perfectly rolled blunt from is lips.

“Yes,” you whispered, breathless from the display he was making.

He handed you the blunt, and you lit it up. Holding the lighter to it and taking a long pull. You sucked in a deep breath before letting your mouth fall open and breathing in through your nose. The perfect french inhale. He watched as you recycled the thick plume of smoke. His dick couldn’t help but take interest, but you were busy finding the album on your phone. You held your hand out for him to take the blunt as you finally hit play. He took his first hit as ‘Me and Your Mama’ twinkled to life through the soundbar, and you were mesmerized by the way his firm chest puffed out as he breathed in. As if on que, he breathed out when the base boomed through the speakers.

‘I’m in love when we are smoking. La la la la laaaaaaa.’

Chadwick passed the blunt back to you, and you took another long pull. You two passed the blunt silently for awhile before it hit you. A deep laugh bellowed from the speaker followed by Gambino’s impassioned wails. You let your eyes fall shut and you swayed to the melody.

“Oh shit did you hear that,” Chadwick said seeming suddenly startled.

“Hear what?”

“That laugh! Where did that COME from?”

You opened your eyes to find Chadwick’s. His eyes were low and bloodshot.

“Niiiiggaaaaaa, you high as shit,”you laughed.

“Oh shit….*chuckle* Fuck I’m high????” he said with a grin plastered onto his face.

The two of you dissolved into a hysterical giggle fit. The sound of his laugh egged yours on and vise versa. Chadwick was near tears from laughing so hard before he finally calmed down. ‘Have Some Love’ came on and you instantly felt transported back to 1970 in a smokey hookah lounge. You got up off the bed and started dancing around the room. Chadwick felt like everything was in slow motion, and to him, you looked like poetry.

“Come on, you can’t tell me you don’t feeeeeel this!” you said as you twirled around with the blunt in your hand.

“I’m feelin’ sumthin’,” Chadwick’s speech was getting slow and lazy.

He grabbed your hand and pulled you towards him. He sat you on his lap, and you put the blunt in his mouth. He inhaled, took the blunt from his mouth, and pulled you into a kiss. You deepened it by pulling his face closer. Then you remembered the bet.

“Mmmm tryna distract me?” you whispered low and dangerous.

His face somehow managed to look more open and innocent. The corners of his mouth, frozen in an unrelatening and gentle grin.

“Imma be honest…”he trailed off watching you hit the blunt.

“Yes?”

“I know you said words, but I don’t know what they were,” he said matter of factly. “Shit am I sayin’ words? Like talkin’? Wild. Yo what song is this? Can we fuck now?”

You lost it, and Chadwick’s face morphed into adorable confusion before he again started laughing.

“I like high Chadwick,” you concluded “he says whatever’s on his mind. This is ‘Boogieman’ by the way.”

You stayed like that, on his lap, just talking. You talked about the deeper meanings of the lyrics and the nostalgia the album stirred in you.You put out the blunt in the incense holder on the nightstand. There was still about half left, but that shit was strong and you both hadn’t smoked in a while. He was rubbing circles on your back, all the while getting dangerously close to your ass. His goofy grin never subsided, and you could tell he was trying to listen, even if he wasn’t full processing what you were saying. The weed was fucking with your sense of time, and before you knew it the beginning chords to “The Night Me and Your Mama Met’ were strumming in. Chadwick’s hand dragged up your face, and you stopped mid-sentence. The eye contact you two made was intense and charged with sexual energy. You’d been sitting on his semi-hard on for a while. You let your hips grind into his. He let out a soft gasp.

“What to you say we call it even because, baby…...I need you. Please,” Chadwick begged. How could you deny his sweet face or such a polite request? You leaned in and kissed his lips with fervor. The high intensified the feeling of your lips meeting, the feeling of your tongues swirling together, the feeling of his hands sliding up and down your legs. You couldn’t help but moan as your hips kept meeting his. Suddenly, an idea popped into your head. You moved to kiss along Chadwick’s jaw. You made your way to his earlobe and nibbled, sending a tremble through his body. Slowly, you kissed your way down his neck. When you reached his collarbone, you slid your tongue out and followed the chiselled lines of his chest. Chadwick was breathing heavy and letting out little groans as he watched your show. You stopped right above the waistband of his grey sweatpants. His eyes met yours as his lifted his hips so that you could free his dick.

“Someone’s excited,” you whispered as you observed his weeping slit. His dick was beautiful. His wet tip was perfectly mushroomed and a light shade of honey cocoa. His shaft was thick with a pronounced vein that ran on the underside. All ten of his inches were throbbing in your hands. Your mouth watered, and you swooped in to start suckling at his head.

“Oooooooh my god baby girl,” his groan reverberated from his chest. This was all the encouragement you needed.You hollowed out your cheeks and took him in as much as you could using your hands to cover the rest of him. You hit him with that head and two hand twist combo. His hands flew to your head, seeking his pleasure. His moans were becoming short and higher pitched. You loved when he got this lost in the sensations. The feeling of him sliding between your lips was making you wet. You pulled off with a dirty pop, letting the strings of spit connect between his dick and your lips. You earned another deep groan at the filthy sight. Your hands were still twisting up and down his shaft as you went down to suck his balls.

“Shit you’re UMHF,” he moaned. You sucked each ball into your mouth paying special attention to them--rolling them around with your tongue. He made a disappointed whimper when your mouth finally let go.

“Shhhh, baby I wanna try something but you gotta stay still,” you said, still pumping his dick.

“Of course baby I’ll be so good. I’ll be so so so soooo good,” he babbled. You placed one hand at the base of his dick and you sucked him in again. You got about half way and took a deep breath. Chad’s eyes widened in realization. You sunk your head down further until the head of his dick slid down your throat. He clutched at the sheets, whimpering. You marveled at how good he was being-- not thrusting up or pushing your head down. You held him in your throat, swallowing around him. To his surprise you began sucking feverishly, head bobbing up and down. It was loud and wet and nasty.

“FUCK,” Chadwick exclaimed. You were moaning and making a meal out of his dick and balls when suddenly you found yourself face down, ass up on the bed. Something had snapped in your lover. Your shorts and underwear were ripped from your body, exposing your wet pussy. He licked a dirty wet stripe right in the center of your petaled heat. He parted your lips with his thumbs to get better access, pushing his face into you. You humped backwards as he tongue fucked your tight entrance.

“Shit Chadwick,” you moaned into the pillow. He replaced his tongue with his lengthy fingers. Knowing your body like the back of his hand, he curled his fingers forward until he found that spot. You let out a loud moan, and he latched onto your clit with his skillful tongue. He was making sloppy slurping noises that only egged you on.

“...C-chad please! Please, pleaaaaaase ooooh fuuuuck,” you brokenly whimpered. You’d started grabbing at his head as you could feel your first orgasm of the night approaching. He switched from sucking on your clit to making broad circles with his tongue to tease you. He eased a third finger inside of you, still working your g-spot. Without warning, he took your clit back between his plush lips and sucked hard. Your pants turned into screams as he coaxed your orgasm out of you. He let you ride out your high on his face before he grabbed your hair, and turned your face towards him. He made a show out of cleaning your juices from his fingers. You almost came again just watching him.

“This pussy is mine,” he growled. He slid a possessive hand around your throat, not choking you--yet. He lined up his tip with your slit, and he pushed forward. The stretch was magnificent. He was filling you up completely. He moved so slowly, kissing his way up your spine while his dick was stretching out your pussy. When we got to your neck and realized his giant hand almost completely wrapped around your throat he squeezed and his dick pulsed. He began thrusting into you wildly. The hand that wasn’t on your neck was pulling your hips back to meet his thrust. Every other thrust, he would swivel his hips sending sparks up your spine. You felt so positively used. Chadwick was growling, but when he started whispering in your ear, you knew you were done for.

“You drive me crazy (Y/N),” he said low and gravelly. “Your pussy making room for my dick. You like being fucked like this? Like a dirty girl?”

“Yes daddy!!! Yes, yEs, YES,” you shouted with each thrust. His hand tightened around your throat at the word daddy, and you started losing air. His thrust were growing wild and erratic, and he moved the hand that was on your hip to your clit. The mix of his fingers around your throat, the fingers moving frantically on your clit, and your high sent you flying into the best orgasm of your life.

“OH fu-SHI AHHHHHHH oOhMigOooOooOd babe! CHADWICK FUCK,” you screamed. You started convulsing on his dick. Your toes curled, your legs shaking, your eyes rolled to the back of your head. Tears started rolling down your cheeks from the sheer force of the pleasure you were feeling. Chadwick’s jaw dropped because you were squirting.

“Fuck fuck fuckfuckfuckfuck UHF,” Chadwick roared, cumming inside of you. His hips slammed into your violently a few times until he finally calmed down. You both collapsed onto the bed, but you were still trembling. Chadwick was rubbing up and down your arms to try and calm you down. He noticed the tear tracks on your cheeks, and his heart stopped.

“Baby? (Y/N)? Was I too rough? I’m so sorry,” he was becoming hysterical. You took a deep breath and tried to find your voice.

“Chadwick, that was the best orgasm I’ve ever had,” you explained with your now raspy voice, “my body was just overwhelmed. I’m okay, no I’m fantastic. I just….need...a….min...” Chadwick chuckled as you fell asleep. He peppered your face with kisses before he let Gambino’s voice lull him to sleep as well--maybe this album wasn’t so bad after all.

[suggestionsofthecaribbean]

The Black Pearl: James and Elizabeth

The morning after Halloween, James and Elizabeth are moderately hungover.  The topic of sex, and sexual boundaries, comes up again.

CW: Carnal matters.  Pervasive and occasionally explicit.

The first thing James did on waking the morning after the shipboard Halloween festivities was stumble out of Elizabeth’s cabin as quickly as he could in search of the nearest unoccupied gun port into which he could be sick instead of onto the floor.

The second was to check the time. The third was to blog one single syllable of displeasure while ignoring the laughing of pirates who were probably no less sodden than he was at the moment but enjoyed getting to call out “You all right there, Commodore?” as he groped his way back toward the cabin, wincing.

Elizabeth waited for him there.

Sunglasses. Advil.

A sympathetic smirk.

“Hey, babe,” she said, peering above her own sunnies at him.  “Don’t be mad, but I let you sleep. I thought you may require it.”

“I am God’s own idiot,” he said, feeling around the bed in case he had left anything there that he needed to bring above deck, up to and including a pistol with which to shoot himself. “I can't even recall last night-”

“I can.”

“Oh, God,” James muttered.

“You were delicious, and so was the rum.”

“I- wait, what?”

James stopped where he was, sitting on the edge of the bed, and rubbed the back of his neck.

“I also partook,” she said delicately.

“You- oh God- did we-”

Elizabeth, who had been leaning back on the bed beside him, legs jauntily crossed, suddenly lost her air of smug superiority and flushed.

“If my memory serves- not for lack of trying.”

“Oh, God,” he repeated, leaning forward into his hands. “Were we the only ones-”

“Drinking? Of course not,” she laughed.

“Thank God,” he said. He accepted the Advil and swallowed them dry. “Elizabeth, I’m sorry-”

“For?”

“Making a fool of myself, as ever.”

“Stop panicking,” laugh Elizabeth, patting him on the thigh.  “You didn’t.”

“I know, I- wait.”

He tilted his head to look at her. “I didn't?”

“No!  You were very popular-”

“In what manner-”

“Charming, very funny - very devil-may-care - you won some money at a dice game. Do you not recall any of this?”

“I might when my head stops splitting.”

Elizabeth eased him back onto the bed, head in her lap, gently rubbing his temple and settling herself against a pillow against the headboard, contentedly. 

“I felt like that in the morning, but I’ve vanquished the worst of it,” she said brightly.  “Of course I think I had much less than you.”

“You're also not breaking several months of abstinence,” he muttered. “Please stop me next time. I shall try to do better as well, but please-”

“I was already tipsy when you started.”

James winced his eyes shut.

“Ah, he said. “That would explain it.”

He let her massage him for a moment longer before his eyes opened again in wide, startled surprise.

“Popular, though-”

“Center of attention, made everyone laugh. Course, we were all drunk, maybe you weren’t very funny-”  Her fingers in his hair grew slow and dreamy as she thought on it.  “...and you are a very flirty drunk, James, my lord.”

“With you, I hope-”

Elizabeth started laughing gaily.  “Of course with me!”

“Ah, good. With my record, I couldn't be certain-”

“Barbossa banished us here after we got a bit too frisky -” Here Elizabeth herself actually winced, biting her lip and disguising her snarl as another laugh. “That, I am afraid, everybody saw - everybody, and Will.”  She realized quickly how James would most likely take that. “...I don’t mean that anybody saw anything but kissing and general flirtation.  I doubt Barbossa could handle any more than that.”

“But we didn't… all right. I shall try to live with this.”

James closed his eyes again; even the dim light of the curtained cabin hurt. Elizabeth surreptitiously slid the pair of sunglasses onto his face, which made him frown a little and then relax again.

“I may have destroyed that goodwill by vomiting from a gunport,” he admitted.

“Pirates.”

“Lisbet, I know I'm not terribly popular hereabouts,” he said, slowly leaning his head into her hands, “and I don't expect that to change over one rash night of drinking.”

“Oh, I know. But first of all, the vomiting will change nothing. And second of all…”

She leaned over him to touch noses for a moment.

“...you’re mine and I don’t care.”

He would have kissed her if not for fear of smelling- and worse, tasting- foul. He reached up to caress her hair instead.

“You're a more patient woman than you credit yourself.”

“I’m not.  But I adore you.”

“You look well for someone in similar condition.”

“I’ve been awake longer. Had a lot of juice. And a lot of Advil.”

“I must look ghastly,” he said, with a weak laugh.

In truth, he didn't; with his eyes covered, it was impossible to see how bloodshot they were, which was the only real resemblance he bore to his former drunken squalor. His beard was trimmed and in good shape, and his hair, though a little sweat-dampened at the moment, had grown out enough to look intentional and maintained again at last.

“Don’t now and certainly didn’t last night.  I distinctly remember. You leaned on everything and flicked your hair out of your eyes with insouciance.  When we made it to the bed you had your knees wide apart. You were inviting.”

“...oh, my God,” he said, sounding mortified. “Only toward you, I hope-”

“Only me - James, you were more attentive to me than you are sober-”

“...ah,” he said, taking a moment to process this. “I'm… sorry?”

“I’m not!”

“I would kiss you,” he said, “but I've been sick-”

“Noted,” she said, wrinkling her nose and laughing again. In truth, her headache had not fully subsided - sitting in the dimmer cabin with sunglasses on sipping unsweetened tea was not what she regularly liked to do for fun - but James feeling worse made her feel better by comparison, and it was also, more favorably, a pleasant distraction to dote on him.  

“If you’ll give me a moment to brush my teeth, I will make up for that-”

“Also noted,” she said delightedly.

James pushed himself up- it took a couple of tries- and stretched, though he had to lean on the wall for a moment.

“Perhaps I don’t need to be as abstaining as I thought,” he said, “if this is the greeting I receive the following morning.”

“On holidays, anyway,” she said gamely.

“And ashore, perhaps,” said James. “When I needn’t be on-task-”

“Oh, perhaps - I can permit that. Less than you drank yesterday, of course-”

“How much did I drink?” His voice was muffled by the toothbrush.

“Enough not to remember today, apparently,” she laughed at him.  “Enough that last night, we couldn’t…”

“That’s for the best.”

“Indeed,” she laughed. “We were about to go full speed ahead, no quondam!”

James took a mouthful of water and then pried open the window to spit.

“Thank God for the carnal failures of drunken men. I doubt I could have sustained it to begin with.”

Elizabeth got to her feet slowly, adjusting her belt in a haughty, masculine gesture, before striding across the room towards him.  Her boots brought her there quickly.  It was such a small space - intimate, one might say.

“I believe I expressed an interest in proceeding otherwise before falling asleep.  Ah, well. I am sure I had very…pleasant dreams,” said Elizabeth, leaning her back against the wall beside him, the picture of innocent intent.

James took off the sunglasses and winced, but he needed to rub his eyes. He had to flick his hair back again to do so, and made a little noise of irritation at having to, but it was more flattering falling around his face whether he wanted to admit it or not.

“A drunken man is no good in bed,” James said as he tugged on the dusty curtain covering the window.

“Seems a drunken woman is very quick to go there, regardless,” said Elizabeth promptly, smoothing his wrinkled shirt.

“At least I now know that I am still capable of socially acceptable behavior while in my cups,” James muttered.

She smiled up at him distractedly. “Indeed.”

“You enjoyed this too much,” he said, faintly alarmed.

“It was enjoyable,” she said, a hint of shyness entering her manner.  From Elizabeth, shyness was a contradictory trait; even when she visibly felt it, it did not hinder her frankness.  In some contexts it even transformed itself into courage, but as far as James was concerned, it was generally precipitous of new boldness.  Sure enough, Elizabeth glanced him over, parted her lips and said, “And I may permit you to do it again, with supervision.”

“With supervision,” James repeated.

“My supervision.”

“Your very sober supervision.”

“...not really what I had in mind.”

“I may be fresh enough for that kiss now.”

“Indeed?” the Pirate King asked, and gave it to him.

“Mm-”

He was still a little unsteady on his feet, and had to cling more than he’d planned.  Elizabeth misinterpreted this, and pulled him closer to her with a little gasp. “Oh, James-”

He kissed her one last time and added, “At least now I have the comfort of getting drunk before you jab me with your little needle, I suppose-“

Elizabeth’s hands pushed themselves up his chest to clutch his lapel and haul him back down to kiss her again.

“You do -”

“Ah-”

He kissed her, hefting her up clumsily into his arms and then staggering just enough from his lingering dizziness to have to hold her up with one arm as he flung the other behind himself to brace with, flicking his hair back again unthinkingly. The waviness that had been visible in his low year was beginning to show again, though at this length it was more of a perpetual floppy tousle.

Unable to keep upright with her in his arms, James carried her toward the bed again and sat down with a thump.

“I shall have to let you cling more in trousers today, I think, if I am to keep you up-“

“Oh, really?” she asked softly, looking him dead in the eyes as she wrapped her legs around his waist and tightened them.

James opened his mouth to say something, looking a little startled, then paused.

“You've got a bit of-”

He tugged it away, to slight resistance, and held it up to show her. It was a little wisp of false hair that had still been stuck to her cheek.

She made a face.

“How drunk was I?” he asked, looking mildly alarmed. “I can’t even place what this is-“

“Drunker than I remember seeing you,” she said with a shrug.

“All right,” he concluded. “Never mind- I shouldn't do this again just-”

“James,” she said, urgently, tightening her arms around his shoulders to pull him closer.

“I’m bound to do something stupid eventually- I apologize for my laxness.”

“It was a party,” she said, not altogether displeased he didn’t remember her as Barbossa, but not altogether happy he didn’t remember curling his forefinger under her chin with an out-of-focus smirk as he kissed her in spite of that.

“I'm not losing myself in my thoughts now,” he said, trying to lean back to look at her, “if that's what you're worried about. I'm only… taking stock of things.”

“James. Come down here.”

“Yes?”

There wasn’t very much there to go down, but he did his best. Elizabeth enfolded him in her arms, pressing his face into her chest and sinking her fingers into his hair.

“Shut up.”

James groaned. “M’apologies.”

He laced his fingers into her hair from his awkward position below, realized his face was level with- pressed against!- her breasts, and quickly tried to lift himself away from them, but Elizabeth was having none of it.

“Stay here,” she said firmly.  “At least until your Advil’s kicked in.”

“Lisbet, this is a rather compromising position-”

“Hmm?” she asked wryly, scruffling his hair.

“My face is in your-”

She tilted his chin up with her fingertips.

“Better now?”

He looked a little dazed as he leaned his cheek on her shoulder instead.

“You don't have to stay here.”

“Low wind today, plus two other captains on board without hangovers.”  Elizabeth paused. “At least, I don’t think Teague’s hungover.  I know he drank last night, but - does it make any difference to him, at this point?  And you know how Barbossa is.  Well, the point is, I don’t have a lot else to do, and the sun is really bright.”

“Saving our strength for the cave. That's what we'll call it.”

She snorted.

“Everyone knows we’re hungover, Captain Norrington.”

“You as well?”

“Yeah?”

“I assumed you hid it around the rest of them, and didn't go running for a gunport for fear you couldn't open the window in time.”

“No, I didn’t make it to a gunport,” she grimaced.  “You slept right through it.  Cleaned it up myself, though.  I don’t try to make it out like I’m better’n anyone else is.”

“I could have helped you with that, if I were not so drunk myself,” he said. “Whatever you're doing with my hair, don't stop-”

Even in the midst of the hangover, the humidity, the headache, her heart melted.

“Oh, James,” she said breathlessly.

“Yes?” he asked, leaning into her touch. “I could hold you instead if you'd prefer-”

“No,” she said, helpless, “it’s just… you’re so…. not-you.”

“Hungover? Unfortunately, that's very me.”

She let it rest there.

“Regardless, I think I ought to hold you a little longer.”

“I'll permit it.”

He allowed himself to lean against her without holding himself back at last, with a sigh.  Elizabeth abruptly shifted, changing her mind- preferring to lean back on the bedspread again, with James resting against her that way.  But soon they had returned to a dreamy state of idleness, Elizabeth coddling him and smiling up at the ceiling half-wittedly.

“How is your ex-husband managing,” James asked softly.

“Sober and fairly well pleased with himself,” she said, more shortly than she meant to.

“Ah,” said James. “I hope he has not given you any trouble-?”

“No.”

“Ah. Good; we last spoke under… difficult terms.”

He paused.

“A running theme, it would seem. No matter; I'm glad enough knowing you're mine now.”

She smiled, perhaps a bit begrudgingly, but it helped her unwind nonetheless.  It was only then she realized how tense she’d become and let out a short bark of laughter.

“Forgive me, I’m… I wish he weren’t on this voyage,” she admitted.  “It’s difficult… knowing he’s here.”

“Presumably this will be the end of it. I do owe him some reconciliation with his father. I promised him that much, and I prefer keeping my word.”

“Yes, I know,” she said distantly.  

“My God,” he said distantly. “I was so far beyond hope that you would ever choose me over him, and yet…”

She ruffled his hair - perhaps a little bit sadly.

“Watching you,” James murmured, “in the heat- in your trousers, without a coat- without so much as jumps, at that-”

“What, sweating?” she said flatly.

“Perhaps a little,” he said. “It makes you glisten.”

“What about it?” she asked, mystified.

“It is intensely attractive.”

She laughed, startled, and then she sighed, loudly, fondly, his name.

“Your hair fanning behind you,” he added. “It reminds me of how fortunate I am.”

She’d been going to tease him about his preference for boys, real or imagined, before he said that. ��Not only did she no longer have an opening for such a joke, she no longer had the heart for it.  Elizabeth rubbed the back of his neck.

Tenderly, she prompted, “Fortunate?”

“To be the man with whom you have chosen to spend your life,” he said. “To say nothing of having the privilege of watching you strut about the deck like that and knowing I may take you to bed later-”

“James!” she gasped, in delighted shock. “That’s very forward of you - I approve.”

“I can only imagine most men prefer their wives in skirts so as to avoid being unduly preoccupied by them otherwise,” James said dryly.

“And do you find yourself unduly preoccupied by me?” she asked, perhaps too giddy.

“Often,” said James. “Too often by far-”

She bit her lip and smirked up at the ceiling.

“You don't know the effect you can have on a man, Lisbet,” said James, in a faraway sort of tone. “Every inch of you. There was a moment some weeks ago when you had tucked your hair under your hat and I found myself held at a disadvantage by the back of your neck.”

That knocked the smirk off her face.  Instead of pride, she found her immediate reaction was disbelief.  And this from her dull suitor of only a few years ago - reconciling this confession with that was a bit much to overcome.

“My- really? My neck?” she asked, gracelessly.

“That one, I confess, is not new- not with how often your hair was done away from it in Port Royal,” he conceded. “I suppose it was the reminder of that.”

“When did that start?” she pressed on, still bewildered. “It’s not a feature that changes with maturity.”

“I seem to recall it around the time I had begun to love everything about you,” he said, rather simply.

It would do very little good to dwell on it - she had already gone over why countless times - and at this point James seemed to wince every time it came up that she wished she had noticed the sincerity - the severity - of his affection sooner.  But Christ!

“Well, it’s all yours now,” she said, even if she could not fully understand what allure the back of the neck could possibly have - she still understood that if a smallish thing like that could provoke him then he must want her very much indeed.

“I think,” he said slowly, eyes shut,  “it was the thought of being permitted to touch it, and the intimacy such an act would entail.”

Elizabeth dislodged him only very slowly as she sat up, only to look down at him a long moment, tracing her fingertip over his lips.

“...Would you like to?”

“Lisbet,” he began, embarrassed. “It's not- I was merely struck by the memory while watching you storm about the place in an unlaced shirt and trousers-”

“Well, if you want to - I think I’d like it,” she said hesitantly.

James sat up with some difficulty, flinching against the sunlight as he opened his eyes again. Elizabeth's hair was down at the moment, but that only added to the sensation as he pushed his hand under it to rest at the back of her neck, as lightly as an insect on a leaf.

“...like this,” he said softly.

Elizabeth parted her lips, and her eyes widened just slightly - but she could not speak for a moment.  When she found it in her to move, she leaned in and rested her head, tremulously, on his shoulder. James threaded his fingers through her hair.

“I couldn't bear to dwell on this-”

“- because I had made you no promise,” she surmised.

Elizabeth released a breath she had not known she was holding.  

“I am so relieved that things fell into place such that I did not lose out on this. On… you,” she confessed, and pressed her face into the area between his neck and shoulder, her arm creeping around his back to embrace him. He put both arms around her and held tight.

“I wish I could make this sound like anything but the lowest of lust-”

“It doesn’t,” Elizabeth snorted.  “That’s - God help me, that was what I was experiencing concurrently.  Thinking about a blacksmith’s toned arms,” she   deadpanned.  “I do know that what I had with Will was real… eventually.  At that point, it was nothing more than a daydream about a boy I barely knew.  At least… at least you knew me.”

“I thought I did, at least,” he said, with a sad smile. He kissed her temple through her hair.

“Enough to know you should like to know me better,” she amended.

“Well,” he said, “now I do. I suppose it ended as well as it could have?”

“As my dog, you mean? You seem to handle it well-”

There might have been a pun in that.

“Elizabeth,” said James. “I scarcely know what I'm speaking of- I would have always- I cannot imagine not loving you, regardless of everything else-”

Elizabeth barely bit back a smile, touching his face as though hesitant to actually lay her hand on him - as though it would pass right through him.

“Oh, well then.”

“I hope that's not overmuch-”

“Hardly, but I don’t know what provoked it-”

“I rather dwell on the thought.”

She laid her hand on his rough cheek, brushing her thumb back and forth affectionately.

“...more than I care to admit,” he said, without looking at her.

“Because I am less amenable than you would like?” she asked, following his gaze, and cupping his face in her hands, leaning in to give him a kiss in apology.

“No- no, you’ve done nothing wrong-” James protested, lowering his eyes, flustered.  Elizabeth laughed against his lips, deepening the kiss - she loved when he got like this.

“I tell you I don’t dwell on this - not like you do. But it rests at the back of my mind, like - “

She slid her fingers into his hair and kissed him again, her fingers gently pressing the crown of his head.

“- like a pressure, and then I give it some mind, and it becomes-”

She gripped his hair - slowly, and not enough that it could pain him, but certainly enough to be felt.

“-overpowering-”

“Elizabeth-”

“I’ll just look across the deck, and see the faint glimmer of red in your hair, and take note of the figure you cut, and it will all hit me at once,” Elizabeth confided, her lips against his, but not yet kissing him, and with her hand as it was, he couldn’t lean in to do it himself.  “That man is mine.  To do with as I please.  As it pleases him.”

She cupped the back of his head as she kissed him. James gasped against her lips, closing his eyes again.

“...red?” he repeated faintly. It was just about the only thing he could seize on that wasn’t going to exacerbate the situation beginning to happen down below. The alcohol was clearly no longer that present in his system.

“Mm, yes. So strange; you have such dark hair.  It’s really lovely, you know.  And it’s grown out almost curling,” she said, wrapping a lock around her finger possessively, adoringly.

“It- yes,” he said awkwardly, trying to keep on a safe topic. “It always has- I suppose it merely doesn’t show after a certain point. Er, thank you-”

Her fingers moved to his chin and glided down his throat in continued approval.  “I suppose I do not like it as you like mine - I can think of no one in the world who has liked anything, the way you seem to like my hair - but my word, James.  That wig did your cause more damage than you have caused any buccaneer in the Caribbean.  I have so much lost time to account for, and I shall begin by recognizing your beauty - you are beautiful, James.  Moreso now I can be prideful to have you, too-”

“I- thank you,” he said again. “It’s- well, had we married, I certainly would not have worn the damned thing in private-”

“Yes, I can only imagine now we are as good as married what it would have been like: very different to my expectations.  And if you had touched the back of my neck as you do now,” she said, with a mean twinkle in her eyes, “or certainly if you had ever put your hands in my hair as you are wont, I would have fallen desperately in love with you, and lived happily ever after.”

“I can only hope I would have,” he said, taking a handful of her hair as he said so and bringing it to his lips to kiss its length.

She shivered.

“I don’t understand. I don’t feel that, and yet…”

“It is not… conditional on your hair- I hope that much is clear-”

“It is, but -”  Elizabeth bit her lip, genuinely conflicted. “Is it strange, though - is it wrong, that the way you like it… affects me?”

James stopped mid-kiss.

“...it affects you?”

“Yes,” she said, self-conscious.

“...ah,” James said awkwardly. “I hope that’s acceptable-”

“Why wouldn’t it be?  I merely want to know if you think it’s wrong- or unusual-”

“I don’t- why would I?”

“You know rather a lot more about relations between men and women than I do -”

“I don’t find it perverse, if that’s what you fear-”

“No,” she said with a laugh. “Weird, at most-”

“I’ve seen weirder,” he said flatly.

“No doubt, in the King’s navy,” she said, holding his chin fondly, and kissing him. James finally laughed again and returned it.

“No, darling, I don’t think there’s anything too odd about it. My only concern is that you find my affections shallow.”

“Less so than my own, I assure you,” said Elizabeth, pulling his shirt open.

“Mm- I shall do my utmost to avoid any permanent injuries, then.”

She ran her hand liberally over his chest, then leaned in to kiss his collarbone.  “Touch my hair again,” she murmured.

James obediently began pushing his fingers through it with a light laugh. “Of course, Your Majesty.”

“Good boy-”

“Elizabeth.”

“I can’t resist that any more than you can resist me.”

He nuzzled into her hair. “Duly noted.”

She let out a sharp sigh.

“Oh, this does wonders for what remains of my misery,” she said contentedly.  “Being here with you.  Though I am sure being more hydrated helps.  How are you feeling, by the way?”

“This is a wonderful distraction,” he said, though his eyes were still closed. “I shall manage.”

“Or be managed, as the case may be.  As the case is, I should say.”  

“Elizabeth?”

“Yes, love?”

“You understand that your physical charms are not all that has gained my interest, I hope?”

“I certainly never imagined so,” said Elizabeth, with the full knowledge that she had been taller and lankier and considerably longer in the chin than most women who were considered beautiful would be.  Besides, she had very little bosom to speak of.  “I can only assume you were bewitched by the idea of a bride who wouldn’t obey a single thing you said.”

James ignored that last jab. “Very well. As long as you understand that I am… aware of the difficulties of this life, and the damages it may inflict-”

“Yes, yes,” she said dismissively. “You’re so morbid, James.”

“You have reminded me often enough that we may not survive this voyage,” said James. “I have reminded myself in turn that there are worse things than that that can befall one at sea.”

“We’ll just have to appreciate each other as though there is no tomorrow,” she said, smiling.

James kissed her again, making a proprietary fist in her hair as he did.

“Good,” he said firmly. “I would hate for you to have runaway ideas about my losing interest in you were you to be without this due to some mishap or another, and that’s only one example.”

“I don’t, but do you really have to speculate on it?” she groaned.  It was not a noise to indicate desire for once.

“It tends to occupy the background of one’s thoughts while thinking of marriage,” James retorted.

“Mutilation does? Are you certain? Are you really very certain?”

“In the Navy it certainly does!”

“Surely not one’s wife’s mutilation, though,” she said dubiously.

“If one is to take her to sea, it's a matter which must unfortunately be weighed. Mrs. Fenton had a halt in her step for some time, though I understand she eventually recovered-”

“Don’t you think,” she baited him, “that you should have given me some notion of that before you married me?  Not a word during our engagement.  Why, you would have had me under false pretences.”

“I would have offered you the chance to stay home,” said James, “and full awareness of the risks. But I also intended to surprise you with the offer to accompany me to sea-“

“An offer I would have gladly accepted - rather more gladly than I had the man who made it,” said Elizabeth, wrapping her arms around his shoulders much like a happy wife would.

“I’m flattered,” James said dryly.

“Who knew that underneath it all, you had such....” Her eyes moved from his, almost unconsciously, down to his bared chest and throat, and she wetted her lips, and looked at him again, and gave a small, helpless shrug.  “-character.”

“Thank you,” he said, even more flatly.

“How glad I am I got to know you better after all,” said Elizabeth, rubbing her hand along his chest once more and dipping a finger between his pectoral muscles with approval. James followed her finger down with his eyes.

“Are you- all right, I shall accept a compliment where I can find it, but God, if it's not a little overwhelming.”

“What, pray tell, do you mean,” asked Elizabeth, her own eyes also following the trespasses of her fingers, as they now strayed over the full expanse of his chest.  Her touches were light, but purposeful and possessive.

“For you to have cared so little, and not too long ago, to this- it’s rather a lot-“

“Oh, James,” she said, eyes meeting his abruptly with a wince of guilt.

James lay his hand against her cheek.

“Forgive me, that was- unnecessarily harsh.”

“Not so harsh as fate’s been to you,” she said, cupping her hand over his and turning her face to kiss his palm.  “I do care for you now - I cared for you before, just not as you hoped.”

She mulled over her thoughts only a moment before committing to what it came to her mind to say. “I love you.”

“It certainly took you long enough,” James said, though not unwarmly or accusingly.

He kissed her. “I love you, too.”

Elizabeth frowned into the kiss, but did not end it - kissed back, harder, as though it were a competition. “I - did not realize - it was a matter of any - urgency-”

“I pride myself on punctuality,” said James.

“And I on my free spirit-”

“All right, I grant you that-”

“I do not need your permission for it,” she practically sneered, but something in her tone of voice was hungry and pleading regardless. “Grant me something else-”

Small wonder what else she could want.

“We still haven’t any quondams, Lisbet,” he reminded her. It was rather a pity; release was good for a headache.

“Let me have it anyway,” she commanded, tossing her hair while gripping his. In spite of the roughness with which she handled him, she never really forgot herself - Elizabeth was always careful to not yank his hair.  If the firmness of her grip startled him, it would at least never hurt.  “I want you in my mouth.”

James stared at her, momentarily deprived of speech.

“...I’m… amenable,” he said, eyes still widened, his whole body bowstring-tense.

She took his hands in hers then, guiding one to her mouth and the other to the crotch of his trousers.  She teasingly took the tips of his fingers between her lips, while her other hand entwined their fingers and rubbed at his groin.

“All right- all right, I'm awake now-”

“Still amenable, darling?”

“You make a strong case-”

“Mm. Awake indeed, my love,” she said, her face lighting up.  “Now… To begin with, I’ll want you to take your shirt off.”

It wasn't hard; his shirt was already mostly open. James did not break eye contact with her as he chucked it aside.

“All right.”

Elizabeth released his hands and reached out for him, burying her face against his chest for a moment and breathing him in.  He smelled of sour sweat and spilled rum, but other, more pleasant odors took over for her - the spices of the rum, the taste of salt, the familiar scent of his skin.  She kissed him, and then she bit him - then she pulled back to assess that she had done him no wrong.

“What was that?”

He was, to be fair, more bemused than anything.

“Does that heighten your enjoyment?”

“...not particularly,” he admitted, “though it scarcely retracted from it either-”

“Pity - it does mine,” said Elizabeth, trying a different approach - she resumed her kisses, but more slowly, and more gently; and then after a time, introduced the application of her tongue.

“I don’t know how you can do that,” he said, watching her with a sort of detached lordliness. “I expect I must taste foul after last night.”

“I like your taste.”

“Perhaps I shall let you wash me when you’re done,” he said, leaning back and shutting his burning eyes again.

“Oho, I did not offer to-”

“Maybe I am telling you to,” said James.

“Sorry, what’s that, dog?”

“I cannot be blamed for trying.”

“Mm.”  The censure of her kisses was mild, at least.  She did consider withdrawing to tease him, but she didn’t particularly want to deny herself just because he was being disobedient.  She would have to show him that being in her power was too enjoyable to give up.

“Mm what-”

“James, you are not being appreciative.”

“Don’t fool yourself into thinking I did not notice your enjoyment of having the tables turned against you the last time I held you down to the bed.”

“Yes, you’re a big strong man, I know,” she said dryly.

“I might do it again later,” he retorted, beginning to smile vaguely with his eyes still closed.

“Are you planning on acting bored then, too?” asked Elizabeth, her patience starting to fray.

“I never claimed to be bored,” said James, as he blindly felt along her arm and back until he had found her neck and could slip his fingers across the back of it. “In fact, I am enjoying myself a great deal at the moment.”

That made up for it for the time being.  After a little more dallying, Elizabeth moved downward.

James tensed and opened his eyes.

His breathing heavy but even, he moved his hand upward to grasp at her hair.

“I think,” he said, “that I may have to provide you with some direction.”

Elizabeth gasped.

“James!”

“I rather thought your majesty liked this-“

“She’s - amenable -”

“Ah. Good for her, then. Continue-“

“May I undress you?”

“Yes- yes, please-“

“Please?”

“Yes-“

“That all? You don’t seem to want it much-”

“I’m a little distracted-“

“By what, pray tell?” asked Elizabeth, as she freed him from his trousers.  “Mm, imagine how I should have gasped to see this once.”

“With- delight, one can only hope-“

Elizabeth, heedless of his hand in her hair, came up to nose at his throat, her friendliness in this manner softening the heartlessness of her teasing.

“Commodore Norrington, it’s enormous-”

“Elizabeth!” James blurted, covering his face with his free arm.

Elizabeth laughed and pulled him sweetly down to her, running her fingers through his hair and kissing the top of his head.

“Elizabeth- what in God’s name was that-“

“Realism.”

“Oh my God-“

She slid her hand down between his thighs again.  “It really is, too, you know,” she said conversationally.  

“Is this- you don’t go telling others anything about this, do you-“

“Our secret.”  She kissed him, while at the same time giving him a squeeze.

“Oh my God-“

James involuntarily released her hair. She made a noise of surprised displeasure, and he grabbed at it again in a scrambling hurry.

“If we are to do this, I need to tell you where to go-“

“What, have I been doing it wrong,” she said dubiously.

“No, it’s- I was put off. I lost my train of thought-“

Elizabeth kissed him on the throat and continued touching him, trying to coax him into remembering.

“...squeezing will do that, you know,” James added, a little crossly.

“Pardon me my eagerness to touch you, Captain Norrington,” said Elizabeth - herself out of breath now.  “You must know how you linger in my thoughts, distract me with longing-”

“A welcome change of affairs, to be certain-”

He regained his grip and tightened it.

“Strange and - unexpectedly -” she managed, before giving up on conversation altogether - having one’s hair pulled will do that.  

“I shall have to ensure my place in them, then, will I not?”

She groaned.

“There are a lot of places I’d like to have you in -”

“Most pertinently, your mouth-”

“And you?” she implored, beginning her earlier attentions again - more slowly than earlier, so as to not get him off track again.  “Do you want to put yourself there?”

“I,” said James, “would be satisfied to put you there myself-”

Elizabeth’s mouth opened of its own accord - not as a reaction to the conversation at hand, but out of dimly interested shock. Something in her brain slowed and stopped processing information when James said filthy things.

“And I do seem to have a good handle with which to direct you, rather than trying to speak on it-”

Elizabeth thought about another smart-ass remark; she was the Pirate King, a pirate lord and captain well beyond simply being voted into the position by men who had wanted to fuck her.  Scourge of the Caribbean or no, James Norrington had better respect her or else.  But her mouth seemed to have some trouble in catching up with her thoughts; she was too tongue-tied for a single comeback.

It was not like Elizabeth to be flustered.  That in and of itself was worth some analysis, and she thought suddenly of what he had said a moment ago about turning the tables.  

Damn him, he wasn’t wrong.

Finally she managed to half-stammer out a reply.  “I’ll - I’ll permit that.”

“Do you desire it, or merely permit it?” James asked. “I would hardly see you forced.”

She grit her teeth for a moment, but he had but to tilt his hand in her hair just slightly enough for her to feel the tug for her to open her mouth again.

“I want it - James, direct me-”

“...Elizabeth,” he began, “are you certain-”

Elizabeth laid her hand on his chest and met his eyes.  Words came to her, but left just as quickly.  Instead she nodded emphatically. James was immediately struck by a pang of regret.

“Mm,” he said. “Come up here and kiss me first. I would rather you here than there to begin with.”

“I’ve no doubt,” she snorted, though she wasted no time in entwining her arms around his shoulders.  “I am trying to acclimate you.”

“If you insist on going down there, I’d prefer to have a degree of control,” James retorted, leaning back to embrace her properly and kiss her.

“We’ve established I don’t mind that-”

“I’ve noticed.” He looked rather amused by this, in fact.

“Do you remember- in Tortuga, you said to me, early on, ‘You don’t have to be the Pirate King in here,’” said Elizabeth distantly.

“Mm. Yes, I think so-”

“It seems,” she said, with the utmost seriousness, “that you really meant it.”

“What does that mean-”

“Did you want a degree of control?”

“I try not to think of it.”

“Usually, from you,” she said cannily, “that means you do want it.”

“I mean,” he said, with a laugh as he looked at her, “that I try not to think of any of it at all. It’s bothersome at best-”

“You’re so boring, James,” she complained, pushing her aggrieved fingers through his wavy hair.  “I think about it as often as I can spare. It’s such a welcome reprieve from the chores of daily life.”

“Ah- keep doing that. In any case, I suppose you don’t find it a chore in itself-”

“What, basket-making? Don’t be absurd.”

“We have not yet made any baskets,” James groused, “and I expect you will find that more of a chore than you think when the option arrives.”

“I don’t see how that’s possible,” said Elizabeth, pressing their bodies still more closely together. “When we’ve been together and you are near me like this I think I am going to pass out from how much I want to have you in me.”

James grit his teeth and gasped.

“The feeling is mutual-”

“Besides - if I need finishing,” she baited him, a smile hovering over her lips, “you’ll finish me, won’t you?”

“Yes-”

He had turned his face away from hers.

Elizabeth gently tugged where her hand was still in his hair.

“James. What is it? What’s the matter.”

“Nothing is the matter,” he said. “I'm a bit sore, that's all. Don't worry about me, please. Last night must have been rather a lot-”

“Changing the subject away from intercourse, when we were just about to have it - that’s a matter all right.”

“Am I not allowed to wish to treasure you a little first-”

“I feel a little oppressed by your treasuring,” said Elizabeth testily.  “It begins to sound like excuses.”

“If it's an inability you fear,” said James, “I would have thought you noticed that my body is more than prepared for such an activity-”

“A reluctance of the spirit,” she said.  She longed to touch him again, but forced herself to keep her hands well above his waist until she had ascertained the truth of his discomfort; she could not force him.

James noticed this, and gently- almost apologetically- took her hand by the wrist and moved it downward.

“I would rather look you in the eye.”

“Going to be somewhat difficult, don’t you think?”

“Then that's the matter.”

Elizabeth withdrew her hand in some reluctance, but she did not feel comfortable floating through this activity unbothered; there were things that had to be addressed, first of all, and she was perplexed by his seeming dislike of her seeing to his pleasure - which, in being denied opportunity to do so, had become more of an object to her recently than achieving her own, which was a feat in and of itself.

“James,” she said plaintively.

“If you insist on it,” he said, taking hold of her hair again, “then get back down there, and we’ll have done for it.”

“Not if you’re going to behave like this about it -”  Elizabeth bit her lip and twisted a little in his grasp, her emotional turmoil making her physically restless.  “At least tell me why you don’t like it-”

“I've told you,” he said. “I prefer bringing you off, that's all.”

“It ruins my pleasure to have you forsake yours,” said Elizabeth coaxingly.  “You enjoy it, why can’t I?”

“Elizabeth,” he said.”It's only a preference. Please don't trouble yourself about it-”

“Well, it’s a burden to me,” she said, pulling a face.  “I want to make you want me… I want to overwhelm you as you do me.”

“I do not wish to be overwhelmed,” he said, after a long pause. “It's uncomfortably like being drunk.”

Elizabeth looked unbearably cranky.

“You like being drunk,” she said peevishly.

“Only in the moment,” he shot back.

“You seem to like the anticipation of it, too, but not this.”  It was clear her mood had taken a turn for the foul, and a sharp one at that, since she had moments ago been dewy-eyed and leaning on him.  Now her posture was stiff and her movements all harsh. Her hand was still in his hair, but it rested there unmoving as stone.

“I don't know about that. I drank a great deal last night and am all the worse for it today, as evidenced by the grabbing you by the hair and dragging you downward like some kind of beast-”

“I think I would have remembered if that had happened-”

“You fell silent- I feared I had hurt you, frightened you in some way-”

“Oh, for heaven’s sake!” Elizabeth cried out, unwilling to hide her disgust with this new inanity - she pulled her hands away from him with a swiftness that bordered on cruelty, even though she did not hurt him in any way.

James, for his part, did not move- only watched her.

“If you insist,” he said, more than a little peevishly at this point, “then you may get down there and handle the matter yourself. That's what you want, isn't it-”

“No, it’s not,” she said heatedly.  “I just want -”

She cut herself off from speaking any further on that subject, and glared at him fiercely.

James sat up and watched her for a moment, waiting for her to say something. He was still at attention, and felt unspeakably grotesque for it. He tried to conceal it by tilting his hips to one side and pulling up the covers.

“I know what I want,” he said, “but I am disgusted by my wanting it. With myself, most of all.”

Elizabeth’s shoulders sagged.  She was trying to keep up her anger, but, as was typical from her, as soon as the opportunity came to put it aside, she couldn’t help it.

“Why? That’s - that’s all I want from you.  I just want to be wanted.”

“I do want you- I've even told you how-”

“Every time I indicate how much I want to attend to you, you reject me-”

“I don't want to be rendered helpless, Elizabeth-”

“I thought that was the entire point of your directing me!”

“That's different- that's- good God, Elizabeth, I don't want to-”

He took a deep breath to steady himself before he said something he would regret.

Like the suggestion that her husband was still on board if she'd prefer.

“I don't derive the pleasure from that you expect me to,” James said, in a carefully even voice. “I struggle to maintain the personal desire for it even as my body makes a crude show of it. Directing you felt as though I might be able to pull you off when I chose- make it a game- and instead you seemed so shocked and compliant that I felt ashamed of having desired it at all. If that's what you desire, then I will have you back down there before you leave this room again, and try not to regret my enjoyment if I do- but at least permit me my concern, especially after the discovery that I am far less prudent when drunk.”

He laughed bitterly. “I apologize if that makes me defective to you in some way.”

“It does,” she said shortly.

“I thought I had frightened you.”

Elizabeth was warring with her own desire to fling into his face that this was the very reason she had not wanted to marry him - something she had anticipated enjoying with Will - but at that all meanness fled, leaving her without much energy, but considerably less ill will.

Miserably, she said, “You hadn’t.”

“Your face went so blank, so slack- I thought you were resigned, at best.”

She put her arms around his shoulders again, shakily.  “I was aroused, you colossal idiot.”

“That isn't how you are usually inclined towards showing it-”

“My brain just…”

She made a little twisting gesture with her fingers.

“- turned off, like a phone.”

“In a good way, I hope-”

“In a very good way-”

“-ah.”

He paused.

“Do you still want to try-”

“Do you? You’ve just explained to me you feel no personal desire for me-”

“You misunderstood me- good God, I want you to the point of preoccupation-”

“But you don’t want to.”

“Elizabeth?”

She tossed her hair, tilting her head to meet his eyes confrontationally.

“...you don't suppose I could have a go between your thighs, do you? I can't guarantee it will be of much use to you, but unfortunately, what I would most prefer is impossible at the moment.”

“Why is that so much preferable to what I wanted?”

“I can look at you, for one,” said James.

Elizabeth tried to give him a frank look, but a smile broke through regardless.  A little embarrassed, she managed only, “Oh?”

“Rather more personal than shoving you down between my legs, wouldn’t you agree?”

“Will you forget it’s me if you can’t look into my eyes? I’m curious-”

“I prefer sharing the moment, that’s all.”

“Fine,” said Elizabeth, perhaps touchily, and perhaps also to hide her smile.  “May I get you started, though?”

“Yes,” he said, “though you'll find I'm rather far along-”

“What, even through this conversation,” said Elizabeth dubiously, moving her hand to between his legs again.  The same slack expression of surprise came into her face.  

“It's been rather trying,” James said flatly.

“So why do you still-” she started, even as she started on him with her hand - gently at first, but still having to shut her eyes.

“-yes?”

He was not entirely comfortable with this, but kept his face carefully blank lest she opened her eyes and got a good look at him again. It was worth it for her sake.

“Mm- why are you still…? Nevermind,” she said, biting her lip and smiling as she looked up at him again.  This was what he’d said he wanted - to look at her.

“Dulling it takes time,” James said vaguely.

“So that’s why the sailor prefers to roll over and go to sleep, rather than fantasize about the girl he left behind,” she teased him.  Her touch remained gentle - she wanted to feel him desperately, but she did not want to help him too far along, if he were going to go between her legs again.

“Now you begin to understand-“

“But you don’t have to dull it anymore, James,” she whispered, nearly kissing him.  “You have me now.  Let me take care of you.”

“Don’t- Elizabeth-“

He began to laugh, embarrassed, and covered his face.

Elizabeth put both of her arms around him now, but more vexed than truly comforting.  “What is it-”

“It’s nothing-“

“Nothing? You can’t look me in the eye-”

“You’ve got me at a disadvantage.”

“What’s that, that you’re aroused?  I would hate to be the one to inform you, but so am I-”

“I know-“

He looked at her, bleary-eyed and grinning.

“Good heavens, it’s not so much, Elizabeth- you needn’t think of it as taking care of me.”

“My sweet Captain,” said Elizabeth, matching his grin, “I don’t. I think of it is as fucking you, and I love it.”

“You haven’t yet,” he said, leaning his head back and closing his eyes. “We haven’t the necessary equipment for that yet, either-“

“You don’t think this is - ? You cannot be serious.  What is it between men, then - on an equivalency to hand-holding?”

“You’ll have to ask Theo about that one. I wouldn’t know; I was not in the habit of regular conversation with anyone with whom- well.”

“This was what I feared, when we were engaged,” Elizabeth finally blurted, after a long while of holding her tongue, even when she had been angrier.  “That my instinct proved correct, and you were about as erotic as a dead fish.”

“Elizabeth,” he said, “you’re lucky I had the sense to avoid getting you with child.”

“You don’t even want to let me take your cock into my mouth,” she argued.

He lifted his head in alarm at her language but chose not to comment on it.

“What am I supposed to do, rut you senseless like it’s two years ago in Tortuga all over again-“

“I just want you to be senseless every so often,” she said wistfully. “To be overwhelmed and to like it.  I want to be - happy together.”

“I’m already happy,” he said, a little woundedly.

“I want you to be happy in our bed as well as out of it,” she retorted.  “Not that I have ever seen you happy outside of this cabin-”

“I am happy in our bed-”

“You are tense and nervous and disgruntled in our bed.”

“Presently, I’m still at attention in our bed,” he said dryly.

“And the reason why you are still at attention instead of sated and lazy is because you feel no personal desire that you have not tried to stifle-”

“Believe me,” he said heavily, “my desire is feeling extremely unsatisfied at present.”

“Put your hand back in my hair.”

“Elizabeth?”

“You heard me.”

After a moment, though, she pressed a hand to his chest, urgently.

“I don’t mean it. I mean, I do mean it, but - there are no consequences if you don’t wish to do it-”

James grabbed her hair in his fist and yanked her downward.

Elizabeth gasped, but came to her senses almost immediately - enough to recall his comfort before seeing to her own, though she was reluctant to wait.

“May I, then-”

“I’m not asking you to talk-”

She needed little encouragement after that.  She had wanted him greedily and unreasonably since they had been drunk the night before, and being given the opportunity, she did not plan to squander it- not that James gave her much room to do so. He held her body in place with one leg and her head between his hands, her hair still clenched in one of them, as he urged her along in silence punctuated by the rare gasp or word of approval.

If he supposed he could have no means of ascertaining her enjoyment, he did not count on how greatly she would enjoy it.  Elizabeth clutched at his hips and his thighs enough to leave a few bruises, and she moaned her delight - not intentionally, but because she could not help herself.  If this was what James called ‘using her’, he was permitted to do so as often as he liked.

James lifted his hand to pry hers away.

“I did not ask you for- nnn- that-”

It was difficult to get a grip on him that both of them were satisfied with, but the negotiation was worthwhile. When it was finished, James silently released her hair and let his hands fall to his sides.

Elizabeth was ungraciously wiping her mouth on the back of her wrist, but she looked starry-eyed when she gazed back up at him.

“Well?”

“Nn. Give me a moment, I'm rather spent.”

“I should know.”

“Were it not for the delay, I would drag you back down there this instant.”

Elizabeth flopped back against the pillow, looking up at him smugly.

“And did you feel so very helpless, Captain?”

“Not particularly,” he said, looking up toward the ceiling.

“Come down here and thank me,” Elizabeth purred.

“No- you're going to come up here,” he said firmly, with another tug for emphasis.  She sat up, stretching her arms above her head.  It was fairly clear that, amenable though she was, she was as easy to control now as the weather.

“Go on, then.”

James pulled her down and kissed her possessively, tightening his grip on her hair to push her mouth to his.

“Is this what you want?”

“Can’t say I mind-” she breathed.

“That will do.”

He turned her down into the cot beneath him.

“James,” she murmured into his mouth, though she took her sweet time in finishing her thought, “Kiss me on my neck again, please?”

He did not object to this- in fact, he set to his task with relish.

“Remove my shirt-” Elizabeth moaned, tilting her head back and lifting her arms to help him.

“I'm working on it-”

“Take your time,” she said idly.  She shivered when the shirt came up over her head, though not from cold. She touched him on the chest a lingering moment, as though contemplating his body, and then sank silently into his arms, burying her face against him, just holding him close.

James dragged her up for another kiss. She returned it tenderly, sinking her fingers into his hair.

“You’re mine, aren’t you?” she asked wonderingly, meeting his eyes.  “Really mine.”

“...likewise,” he said softly, “yes?”

“Entirely, I think.  I don’t understand it myself.”

“You've mentioned that,” he said, a little desperately.

“I want no man but you.  I don’t even want a woman.  If the thought appeals to me in the abstract, it is not really serious enough to detract from wanting you.  And I barely feel guilt over it.  Even when I think that I should, I can’t persuade myself to.  I simply want you, over and over again.  In bed and in battle and on a beach some day, when it is not raining.  And I think something else, too.”

“What else do you think of?” James asked softly.

“I think we were always meant to be together,” she confessed.

“I don't- I'm not certain that's how it works,” said James. “I believe that in some way I was destined to love you, but I do not believe that you were always meant to return it.”

“I do. I was,” she insisted.  “Everything that’s happened has thrown us together in the most unlikely way - as though fate were determined to have us together.”

James watched her for a moment, as though waiting for her to begin laughing

When she didn't, he kissed her again- joyfully this time, with a surprised cry of happiness.  Elizabeth wrapped her arms around him tightly, returning the kiss with near biting enthusiasm.  

The topic was important to her - it was how she had always felt about Will, and perhaps the transfer of this belief from Will to James had assuaged much of her guilt about choosing the latter, as well as whatever twinges of the emotion she had when she thought of Jenny or Angelica a little too long.  But, most of all, it was important to believe that James - and her father - had not been wrong to hope for this union, and had pursued it for nothing.  She wanted to believe her father would be happy to see them together at last, and to bring order to a life which had been uprooted in every way - both his and her own.  

But it did seem likely - the way they had fallen in love in Tortuga, the way she had come to save his life, as though directed by a higher power, was surely not usual.  The fact that they had been engaged at a point where it might have been a disastrous ill match, but had been thrown together again at a point where they could meet as something closer to equals (and if not equals, when Elizabeth, not James, was the more powerful of the two) - these things could not be an accident.  If she had married James then, not only would she have been unhappy, but she would have made him miserable - and Will would never have had a chance to be reunited with his father.  No, everything had surely happened as it must - and now she was with the man she was meant to be with, her soul-mate, the man her dearly beloved father had chosen for her future happiness, because he had waited for her, and proven his love by waiting, as she had proven her worth by becoming a pirate lord in the meantime, and recognized his by choosing him.

“Elizabeth,” he said, clasping her hands in his. “Elizabeth…”

It wrenched her sharply out of her fantasy to see the naked joy on his face and feel guilt at it, even now.

“Yes, James?”

“It's nothing- please, just let me say it-”

“Say whatever you like,” she murmured.

“-just Elizabeth,” he said softly, before kissing her again.

Elizabeth toppled them both backwards, all the better to let him feel the weight of her and know she was his own. James groaned a little- his headache had not yet dissipated- but he began to laugh anyway.

“Careful-”

“I’m always careful,” she said, affronted.

James mmmmed loudly but let the matter rest. He pushed his hands back into her hair with a pensive smile.  Elizabeth ended up rolling off him and pulling him to his side so that she could continue to kiss him more comfortably.  She had no aim, no finish in mind; the matter was less obvious for her than it was for a man; she just wanted nothing more than to hold him very close and to kiss him as though she could drink him in, and wanted to be drunk.

“My apologies for the undoglike behavior,” he laughed against her lips. “Is this- would you like more of this?”

“More of your mouth, more of your kisses-? Of course-”

“More of my force-“

“More of your enthusiasm, to be certain. The forcefulness - well, it is a fun sort of game, really.”

“What do you mean by that?”

“Well, I am your Captain, am I not?”

“I certainly don’t expect you to carry on like this before the crew.”

“Mm, I like you to be a man with me, James, but not a master,” she said fondly, before gripping his hair tightly again. “I may not be a man, but I am your master. There should only be one of each, between the two of us, I think.”

“Ah- all right, noted-“

She took advantage of her grip on him by kissing his bared throat.

“You know,” James began, gazing up at the ceiling again, “on consideration I find myself less opposed to the idea of that swan tattoo-“

“Yeah? Where shall you get it?  I have some ideas,” said Elizabeth - gliding her hand down his stomach teasingly.

“Elizabeth-“

“That would be so scandalous and none would ever see it but I-”

“How would they tell I’m yours, then, when we are apart-“

“Must we be apart? You’re giving up the Gloriana to be by my side and in my bed.”

“I’ll probably have to go out and do your bidding from time to time.”

“Oh, true enough. I don’t suppose you could tell them yourself?”

“I’m not exposing anyone but you to that much of myself, tattooed or not,” James retorted.

“That will have to satisfy me.  And, I find it does, now that I think on it.  I want you to belong to only me.”

He smiled tiredly. “I thought it might.”

“Then at least I know you are finally, finally convinced of the depth of my feelings for you.”

“You should know by now that I want nothing else as much as to be yours.”

Her fingers in his hair turned as coddling as they were possessive.  She opened her mouth so as to speak, but nothing came to mind, and so, after a moment of this, she shut her mouth, and smiled and shook her head gently, as though conceding the speechlessness contentment and bliss had brought her to.

“And you can have your damned earring,” he added, before kissing her.

Elizabeth smiled so hard into this kiss that she had difficulty returning it. James noticed and rolled her on top of him with a warm, satisfied laugh.

“I want…”

“Yes, darling?”

“I want the world to see the way you have affected me,” he said softly.

“You mean you want to look dangerous,” she said, with a wicked showing of her teeth.

“It wouldn’t hurt anything,” James said, grinning back.

“My darling Captain.”  She pushed his hair back from his forehead and kissed it.  “I confess, I am impatient for it.”

“Not dangerous enough for your taste yet, I presume?”

“For the two of us to do something fun,” she clarified.  “I miss raiding.  I should like to do it with you sometime.”

“A suitable target, I hope,” James said, very seriously.

“Oh, darling, let’s get one of Beckett’s,” she said with bright, misty eyes.

“I will purloin you another crew.”

She kissed him as if he had told her he planned to pick her a bouquet of wildflowers. James meshed both hands into her hair and guided her along the way, but he was gentler this time- more lingering.

The kiss, which had begun almost affectedly chaste, deepened gradually with time.

James released her hair from one hand and let it glide down her back instead, until it found her backside. He gripped it- lightly, teasingly, but a grip all the same.

“When they write the ballads in years to come, they will recall that I turned pirate in your bed…”

Elizabeth laughed in response, low and sultry.  She pulled back just enough to turn her eyes up to his, stealing a glance in secret, unabashed pleasure.

“Lord, our reputations are really sealed in stone, aren’t they?”

“I don’t expect to be anything but an addendum to your story.”

“You a degenerate. Me a whore.”

“You, an outlaw woman-king-”

“And a whore,” she said, her mood perhaps a little less pleased.  “I know what people think like.”

“People think that of queens who began their lives as princesses as well,” James reminded her.

She thought of the English queen whose name she shared and tried to cheer herself up a bit.  “Yeah, I suppose,” she said, a bit more brightly. His hand helped.  “I don’t mind being your…. “  No good; even at her bawdiest she could not say that.  “...I do not mind being yours.”

“You’re more of a bride regardless,” James said offhandedly. “You came to me good as one regardless-“

“I know,” she said, and briefly smiled, radiant as one. “But that’s not what the ballads will say.”

“Are you so certain?” he asked, as he began to bend his head toward her neck and kissed her collarbone. “You’ve demonstrated a rather imperious fidelity to your- mm, what did you suggest? Your werewolf lover-“

“I’ve been held captive by two pirate lords,” she said rather loudly.  “Married once now.  After being engaged to you first.  Then there’s the curious ambiguity of my situation with Jack.  I’m afraid I shall never convince anyone I was a maid before now.”

“They’re as likely to consider you soiled and vengeful about it as anything else.”

“I suppose it’s for the best. To be honest,” she said, and realizing this cheered and relieved her immensely, “I would rather that rumor than the truth be known.  Elizabeth Swann a maid, even her husband having had no pleasure off her-”

“Give me another fifteen minutes and I shall make you less of one,” James cut in.

“Oh, sweet boy, there is yet one particular quality of maidenhood you cannot ease me out of,” she crooned, touching his cheek gently with one hand - and sliding the other down her own thighs.

“Lie back and we'll see about that…”

“I think you might see something.  Sit up.”

“No interest in my going between your thighs, then?”

She pushed him backward daintily with one foot, which should capture his attention - and give him a fairly good vantage point when she began to glide her fingertips over herself and smirk at him.

“Elizabeth, what is-“

“Do you want to help me ease the trousers off? I cannot guarantee you shall be allowed anything but a view, but-”

“Elizabeth!”

“I don’t think you can convince me you wouldn’t enjoy it,” said Elizabeth, wriggling out of them.

“If it's all the same to you, I'd rather participate-”

“Oh,” she said breathlessly, fast on her way to being quite naked; “would you?”

“It will certainly hold my attention better-”

“We’ll see.”

Elizabeth put her foot on his thigh, forbidding silently that he should move from where he sat, and met his eyes as she glided her hand over her pelvis.  She touched her lips with her tongue, almost nervously, and then her mouth opened and she let out a small moan.

“Oh, my God-”

James had to look away.

“James! I command you to pay me - the attention and the respect I am owed, both as your captain and as your woman-”

“ELIZABETH.”

“Please, James,” she pleaded.

“I don't- I don't fully understand-”

He looked at her in apprehensive anguish.

“I just want - I want you to see-”

“I'm not sure I can- react appropriately-”

“All I want you to do is watch me - and perhaps- later -”

“Let me-”

“Perhaps later-” she said, out of breath - as much from shyness as anything else; she was hardly touching herself yet, not without reassurance that he wouldn’t look away - “you might - think on it-”

“I don’t want to think of it later,” he said, attempting to maneuver himself out from behind her leg so he could lay beside her, and finding it difficult. “I want to assist you- now-”

“I’m asking you to let me show you - perhaps you’ll - have some advice - and - if you would like to assist-”

Elizabeth swept her hair off her neck with her other hand and pushed her shoulders back, tilting her head and extending her neck.  “- will you - will you put your hand here -”

“Yes-”

He clapped his hand, more roughly than intended, to the side of her throat, and then quickly relaxed it again to support the back of her neck.

“Will this help-”

“Will you touch me - just here, and…”  She trailed her fingers down and over her breasts.

“May I kiss you?”

“I want you to watch me-”

“Are you certain?” He pressed his lips to her shoulder- a safe place, he assumed, to test the waters.

“Yes-” she moaned, but it was momentarily ambiguous as to whether or not this was an answer.

“Absolutely?” Her throat now.

“You may kiss me later,” she said, and now the moan in her voice was slightly petulant.

“If you insist. I was prepared to move downward, you know.”

“I do insist. You know that I do, why are you trying to weasel your way out of it-”

She had stopped what she was doing on account of the lull in his attention.  He sapped all the fun out of it.

“I thought I might intensify things-”

“Wait,” she said, now more irritated than anything else. “Until you’re asked for.”

“Am I still permitted to touch you?”

“You are, but I may rescind that- if you keep misbehaving-”

“Misbehaving? Is that what you call it?” he asked, trailing one finger along the underside of her breast.

She made a soft, indecipherable noise.

“If you can’t be patient,” she amended, in a more tender tone of voice.

“Not an hour ago, you were furious with the thought that I did not want you,” James said, as he moved that finger along to the other breast.

“I never really doubted that you wanted me,” said Elizabeth now, pushing herself up onto her elbows.  “Just perhaps that you did not want me as I want you - there’s a difference.  You are a little aloof, James.”

“Mmm. Well, you may remove that from your concerns, madam. You have my full-”

He curved his hand up and squeezed.

“-attention.”

“I had better,” she murmured, laying back down again almost sleepily. “You had better watch.”

“I don't know when I'll be ready,” he said, with a significant downward gesture.

“That doesn’t matter-”

“Fortunately for you, I haven't eyes for anything else,” James said, arranging himself to watch her.

The result of having to talk him into it was that Elizabeth was now a little shy about it.

“So why did you mind before-”

“I have to remind myself I'm not prying.”

Elizabeth lay back on the bed with a nervous hum.  It made her feel slightly better to slide her foot back into his lap in the process of parting her legs again; at least she could distract herself teasing him. James watched and felt his confidence eroding more and more the wider her legs spread.

“Should I be… er- taking notes-”

“Shh.  Let me look at you.”

“-yes, Elizabeth.” He swallowed, hard.

That made it easier - watching his throat jump like that - that made her want to do it.

“You- you have me at a tremendous loss-”

She shut her eyes for a moment, fancying she could hear his tremulous breathing.  Most likely untrue, but it did help.  “Oh, James-” she murmured, almost inaudibly.

“Elizabeth,” he said, so flustered his voice came close to cracking, “I could help if you liked-”

“You’re doing enough,” she sighed dismissively, leaning her head back.  That was true; James in this state did more for her than all of the other stimulations in the world.

“This feels unforgivably decadent,” he said, eyes widening.

“No, then there’d - oh - there would be - you would peek at me through veils-”

Elizabeth was still quick with words, but it was taking more and more concentration to be so.

“As though you’re on display for my- er- benefit-”

“I am-”

“Oh, God- Elizabeth, I'm not ready- I actually feel quite pleased, thank you-”

Oh, he was flustered, all right- flustered enough that he began laughing at his own foolishness and covered his eyes in embarrassment.

“Mm,” she complained, opening her own eyes in time to see him bury his.  “Do you want to assist me, James?” she asked breathily, turning her foot to dig her heel into his thigh, a nudge to get his attention.

“I certainly might be more effective that way,” he said, lowering his hand to look at her. “I fear we have some time before I’m of much use otherwise.”

“I can - nnh - delay my gratification-” she said, and the motion of her hand slowed.  “I thought I told you to look-”

“I think,” James said gently, “it will have the effect you desire on me if we wait until then.”

“Oh, very well,” she said, a little sleepily, but game.  “Come here and clean my hands.”

James slid up beside her and picked up his discarded shirt to wipe her off, punctuating the gesture with a little kiss to her forehead.

“Now help me dress…”

“Oh, are we finished? I do enjoy looking at you this way.”

She flushed and beamed at him, sitting up a little shakily - she was rather far along, with no closure in sight. “I feel exposed,” she said, without any self-recrimination or even any irony.

“Would you have me finish you?” he asked, putting his arm around her to support her.

“Not if there’s a chance that…”

“Hmm? Darling, you seem a little unsteady-”

“You made me an offer earlier,” she said, putting her arm around his shoulders just to pull him close enough to lick his ear.

“I can do more than that,” he reminded her. “You're not as easily winded as I may be.”

“Perhaps I want to make you wait,” she teased him.

“I haven't much choice at the moment,” he said, giving her ear a little reciprocal nip.

“To please me-”

James kissed her forehead again.

“You're burning up, sweetheart.”

“I am not.”

“Are you certain you want to wait?”

“I am certain that I want to drive you mad,” she said, kissing him slowly.

“Lisbet-”

He laughed against her lips. “Lisbet, it's not that, it's… it won't have the effect that you think. I can't- a man can't be driven mad for a certain period after his last exertion. It's not only a matter of whether or not he may stand at attention-”

“Then I’lll wait-”

“Very well. I only hate to see you suffer.”

“I don’t suffer,” she said, smirk widening.  “You hate nothing. You enjoy pleasing me.”

“At present, I’m afraid I can't enjoy anything much more intensely than smiling and nodding.”

“Come here, then, and enjoy my smiles,” she said, reaching to stroke his hair again.

“Gladly,” he said. “You may have mine in return, but I doubt they are quite so dazzling.”

“Your doubt is misplaced,” she murmured.

He laughed again, leaning his forehead on hers. “Well, I suppose you were hardly more sober than I was.”

“I remember last night better,” she pointed out.

“That would certainly explain your looking better than I suppose I must.”

“You’re beautiful,” she argued, before thinking better of it.

James met her eye for a moment, grinning with flattered pleasure.

“I’m not making an argument for my own ruination,” he said, “only a lapse in judgement last night. I’ll accept the compliment.”

“You do nothing without my permission,” she said, extremely pleased, pulling his hand to her heartbeat.  “The fault is mine, darling.”

“And what fault is that-”

“For letting you drink-”

“It would appear to have been a good time for all involved. I forgive you.”

“Mmm, show me.”

“How’s this-“

He kissed her, vehemently and open-mouthed. James was still some minutes away from being able to react as much as they would both like, but knowing that this would have an effect on her was its own satisfaction.

Elizabeth had not expected that - not when he was acting so spent.  She arched upwards against him, gasping his name.

“Were it not for the risk, I would have you as soon as I am able-“

“Mm, what if -”

“Hm-”

“- I want you,” she said quickly, shyly.  “We could risk it-”

“Even if I were to get you with child?” James asked, leaning in toward her again.

“We’ve -” She kissed him. “- discussed this-”

“Elizabeth, I…”

He hesitated, the same old litany of concerns playing on a loop in his mind.

“I- if you’re certain, Elizabeth, I don’t think anything could make me happier than to have a child with you-”

“Why is this always the first place your mind goes,” she complained.

“Because neither of us is diseased,” he said dryly, “so that’s out of our concern.”

“Yes, but-” She snorted in displeasure.  It was not a fun distraction, thinking about raising a child, foggy and unfamiliar though the idea was.  Thinking of carrying one was even worse.  

“I suppose I could try to withdraw in time,” James murmured, “though- well.”

He gestured at himself.

“Do you prefer to wait for a quondam,” she asked gently, cupping his cheek.

“No-” he said, a little too quickly.

Then:

“...but speaking practically, yes.”

She smiled at him, perhaps a little disappointed, but overall visibly content.

“Then we shall.”

“More’s the pity,” said James, who was more than a little disappointed himself. “You're certain-”

“We’ve managed this long,” she said gamely, struggling to maintain the facade of a self-sacrificing good mood.

“I know,” he groaned. “Believe me, I have searched for a substitute-”

“I like the things we do,” she said with an affronted sniff.

“As do I. You know that.”

“Then why are you so dissatisfied?”

“Dissatisfied is the wrong word,” said James. “It is more of a longing.”

“There you go, being poetic again,” she said drily - before she could take it back.  It was a defensive manoeuver, always responding with sarcasm when James had done some romantic thing she could not possibly reciprocate.

“It is what one might eventually have done with a wife, after all-”

“You did not think about this when you wanted me for your wife,” she reminded him with a wry smile.

“Through great effort alone,” said James. “And perhaps- well, one day. Presumably far in the future, we may still-”

Elizabeth sat up, blindly reaching around for her clothes.

“Hm?”

“-marry.”

“Very far, I would imagine,” she said musingly, but without a great deal of thought.

“Far enough to make dwelling on it foolish.”

Elizabeth pulled her shirt on lazily, one sleeve at a time, but could not bother to button it just yet.  She fingercombed her hair over one shoulder, picking out the tangles left there from this most recent romp, reminiscing fondly on how they’d got there - both his strong, broad hands buried in her hair and urging her on while he arched underneath her - her name on his lips and his pleasure on hers.

It made her beam up at him a little slyly.

“You know,” she said, “I like it when you call me ‘Lisbet.’”

James grinned. “I shall make an effort to recall that.”

“I’ve never been Lisbet before,” she said wistfully.  “It makes me feel… It reminds me that I am only yours.”

She was not certain she was anyone’s, but it would not be worthwhile to tell him so.

“Surely you're not dressing already,” he said as he sat up himself. He had been momentarily distracted in watching her.

“I feel naked,” she said bluntly.

“For what it's worth,” said James, “I like you naked.”

“I thought you liked me in trousers, dressed up like a sailor…”

“I enjoy both, but one is decidedly easier to have you in.”

“To have me, you mean,” said Elizabeth, tone light.

“I certainly won't object to trousers, if that's what you prefer.”

“Yeah, but kind of difficult to have me in trousers, hmm? Without making a mess.”

“Mm, yes, rather.”

She reached for them anyway.

“Must I do everything myself around here?” James grumbled, reaching toward his own crotch and gauging her reaction.

One of her lovely eyebrows lifted, and her smile grew perhaps a touch smug, but she did not comment. James was, of course, still not quite ready to begin with, and leaned back against the wall, still seated in bed.

“Well,” he said, “by all means, don't let me keep you.”

“Oh, no, now you’ve raised my interest-”

“It will have to wait all the same. Your trousers will not diminish my interest, believe me.”

“James,” she laughed.

“Yes, Lisbet?”

Her gaze grew tender.  “James,” she repeated, leaning across the bed to kiss him.

“Mm- yes, darling?”

“Just let me say it,” she whispered to tease him, and kissed him again.

“Ah-”

He was still bleary-eyed, but positively beaming between kisses.

“Have at me, then, my stubborn little sailor…”

She whispered his name as she kissed him, guiding, first, his hand to her breast, and then sliding hers between his legs.

“Forgive me if I am slow to react…”

“Forgiven,” she said primly.  “Thank you for permitting this…”

“The pleasure is mine-“

“Not that it is really yours to permit me,” she said, with a flash of hungry teeth.  “You belong to me, body and soul-”

James laughed. “Oh, of course. It’s mutual, isn’t it?”

“Yes-” Elizabeth gasped.  He might have been slow to react, but she wasn’t.

“Oh- mm. Good, then-“

She moved closer then, parting his legs and sitting between them, her free hand roaming along his bare torso idly while she kissed him.  If his body was hers, she would act like it.

“You poor creature, you must still be on fire-“

“I am!” she laughed, or cried, against his mouth.  “Good Christ-”

“I’ll have to finish you next-“

“You can go between my legs again - if you want,” she said, turning her eyes up to his quickly.

“Mm- that may take too much time. I would not see you forced to wait any longer-“

“I want to wait for you-” she insisted.

“I could try to manage it now if you would like-“

“Not yet,” said Elizabeth.  “When you beg for it- then we can.”

“You had better make it slow, then-”

“Take as long as you like,” said Elizabeth, kissing him on the neck now.  “I’ll be here.”

“And you're certain that will bring you off? I would hate to make you- nnn- wait again-”

“I think a breeze would finish me- If there’s so much as a draft in here, it’ll finish our fun prematurely-”

“Fortunately for you,” said James, as he semi-blindly groped forward to pull on her shirt, “you're easier to start up again than I-”

“Start up again? But I never stopped-”

“Were a breeze to finish you-”

His words cut off in a harsh, biting sound as he gasped and grit his teeth, eyes wide, though not precisely disturbed or displeased.

“Where did you learn to do this?”

“Uh, here, you brilliant mastermind.”

“You're rather good at it.”

James was trying to be dry, but it was difficult under the circumstances. He pushed Elizabeth's shirt off of one of her shoulders.

“Take hold of my hair, will you? I’ve not grown it for you to ignore it at a crucial moment such as this-”

“Oh, darling,” said Elizabeth in a swoon, though her grip was firm and punishing and her smile was cruel and playful.  “Forgive me my negligence. You know I am still unused to these matters.  I get so distracted so easily.”

“You’re- ah- forgiven-”

“I can’t seem to help myself.  You know how I love doting on your prick-”

“I’ve noticed.”

“- you could dissuade me, you know. Try being less provocative-”

“-oh, so I’m provoking you now-”

“Biggest tease on the ocean.”

“The better to render the family name good and blackened-”

“Biggest something else on the ocean too,” she murmured; “or perhaps that’s only the limits of my imagination-“

“That's- you've a bias,” James blurted, going red in the face.

“Just can’t imagine they get any bigger.  Hard enough to get the whole thing in my-”

“Oh my God.”

“I’ll have to work on it.”

“It's- I've heard that attribute is of no real consequence,” James said awkwardly. “It's something men crudely brag of in taverns to win fights, and of no value beyond that-”

Elizabeth smirked at him, like a cat presented suddenly with a saucer of cream.  

“Your modesty in this matter does much to assure me my assumption is correct.  You would only inform me - with so much humility and shyness as this - of the irrelevance of that attribute if you knew you possessed it.”

“I don't want you to think it's beyond disappointment-”

“James,” she said, with great majesty composing her features into a more frank expression. “I hope you understand me. I know very well the disappointments you are capable of.”

“Not- gah!- all of them!”

“No? Surely I am. Your oppressive good manners, your projected blandness, your morbid detachment from carnal matters-”

“Must you call it morbid-”

“As one dead, Captain.”

“Does this feel dead to you!?”

Elizabeth could not hold back her smile forever, not when her teasing found so soft and easy a target.

“No,” she said softly, leaning in closer and rubbing him more slowly.  “Not at all.”

“Christ,” he said, “I should hope not-”

She thought of her experience with dead men and brushed it off.  

“Show me,” she murmured; “kiss me.”

“Don't let me go,” said James, and he did.

Oh, she loved him. Good Christ, how she loved him.

Elizabeth felt a stab of pleasure go through her like bright, sticky lightning and gasped against his lips.

“I think I'm sufficiently prepared,” James whispered into her open mouth. “Lie down, dearest-”

She didn’t need a second telling.  She did not quite lie down, though, leaning up on her elbows because she couldn’t take her eyes off him.  His hair hung in short, tousled waves around his face - eyes all the more interesting with his tan - and she couldn’t stop looking at that face she had known so well, and somehow only recently discovered was so handsome it made her heart beat faster to see him smiling, just for her. James began to maneuver himself into position and then stopped, though he rubbed the inside of her thigh to assure her that he was in no way reluctant.

“Darling?”

“Yes?” she asked, nearly panting, cupping his cheek so that she could keep taking in the sight of him.

“Do you want to be on top?”

“Oh,” she exclaimed.  “If - if you think- if it’s safe-”

“It might be safer. Gravity and all that-”

Elizabeth was already pushing him down and straddling him, too enthusiastic to notice she’d been a bit rough.

“Careful-” James blurted, but he was too busy laughing to imbue it with much authority.

Elizabeth let out a loud sigh.

“I don’t tire of that-” she gasped, when she could manage words.  “James, Christ-”

“What now-”

“What do you think-”

“I’m flummoxed.” It doubled as a convenient euphemism.

“James,” she said, exasperated - more than a little physically overwhelmed.  She had been wanting a long time, and yet there seemed to be still more barriers to her personal satisfaction.

“I love you,” he said, reaching with one unsteady hand to brush a lock of her hair back.

That only increased her desire - it did not fulfill it.  She shut her eyes, more aware once she had of the sound of her breathing, shaky and shallow.  

“I love you-” she countered in nearly a whisper.  “ - touch me, will you?”

His hands found her breasts. James lightly stroked one of her nipples with the pad of his thumb.

She let out a whimper and closed her arms around his shoulders, burying her face into the hollow of his throat.  Elizabeth was not generally self-conscious enough to seek to muffle herself, but the only man alive whose disapproval and hurt mattered to her was on this ship - and besides that, she thought she might make a lot of noise.

“Would you prefer I- nn- muffled you myself?”

James was trying to sound teasing. It was about as hard as he was.

Elizabeth shut them both up for a good long while. James’s participation was necessarily somewhat limited, but he had to playfully pull himself away from her from time to time- make it a game- to extend his own longevity, and hopefully hers as well, while making it clear that he was not experiencing another attack of reluctance or misplaced conscience. He could only pray that his- hopefully- wolfish grin when he did, and his eager, exploratory hands gave the game away.

By the time they had both climaxed and fallen into one another's arms, James’s headache had mostly dissipated. Whether that was the Advil or two rounds of release, he couldn't say, but it was a blessed relief either way to bury his face against her neck, into the sea salt scent of her hair and no longer feel the burn behind his eyelids.

“Good Christ,” he murmured. “You're… mmph. You're very good at that.”

After such a long time of wanting it, to finally achieve this elation had exhausted her.  Elizabeth was entirely spent and refused to do any more than the bare minimum of movement. Therefore the pressure of her fingers against the back of his neck, sunk into the base of his hair, was very light, and their motion was very slow.  It did not quite qualify as a massage.  A good wind would have been stronger.

“Elizabeth?”

He propped himself up on one elbow.

“James?”

“Ah, good. There you are. I thought you had exhausted yourself.”

“Myself? You exhausted me.”

“One does not wish to overestimate one’s contributions,” James said, affectedly stiff and more than a little self-mocking.

“You wore me out,” she complained, while smiling.

“I did notice a fair bit of recurrence.” This was a bit more smug. “I did not even realize this kind of success was possible with your particular anatomy-”

“I did not realize it was not with yours.  You’ve been….. mm, instructive,” she said, biting her lip and smiling.

“Ah, good,” he said again, as he did not wish to say anything more vulgar. “Put your hand in my hair again, will you?”

She threaded her fingers through it, remarking again on its admirable curl and depth of color, and reminding him that she had still not grown used to seeing him without his formal wig, but liked him better every single day.  In general she liked to look at him. He was beautiful, and realizing both that he was hers - and that she had almost lost him - made her more inclined to linger on the thought.

“Most of the curl will be weighted out by the time I am able to tie it.”

This came out in a startlingly rueful tone from the sheer force of fear of disappointing her. James immediately covered his eyes with his hand in mortification.

“Pardon me- I did not intend to sound so morbid where something so petty is concerned.”

She laughed at him. “James, it’s not a big deal.”

“I know it isn't- though in truth, living up to your expectations often feels like the most important demand in my life at present-”

“You have far exceeded my expectations. You know what I thought of you.”

“You have no trouble reminding me,” James said dryly. “I couldn't not know.”

“You meant my... present expectations?”

In truth, Elizabeth had none - she did not think of relationships in that transactional way he assumed - but she wanted to soften what she had just said.  

“...yes?” said James, with an uneasy rising intonation.

“That you comfort me, and irritate me, and make up for it; that you be sarcastic and interesting, and sensitive, and in need of your own comfort and irritation; and that you make me regret the last few years sorely, but the last few months not at all, and make me impatient for the future? And that you be as good a second as any captain could imagine, and as good as a husband to boot, and that you be here, in this bed, when I climb into it in at night, even when our day has been awful, and I am stinking angry at you?”

She pinched his nose.

“You’re better than I expect, a great deal so.  I never thought you would give over the Gloriana to be with me, and you’ve said you will.  I still cannot believe you brought me the heart of Davy Jones, for that matter.  And, darling James,” she laughed, pinching his chin instead. “You grew a beard for me.”

“It was the least I could do after you saved my life,” he said, faux-somberly. “Twice, to be fair.”

“I only saved your life the once.  And you had saved mine already.”

“I seem to recall a rum bottle cracked over my head-”

“Ah, well. That wasn’t guaranteed in either direction,” she said, but she looked smug.

“I want to do right by you,” he said, with a softer, more sincere note creeping into his voice. “Everything else is secondary. I suppose I will sort  out in time.”

“You do,” she said, fond with exasperation.

“It’s a matter of convincing myself, then,” said James. “Of- of allowing myself to believe that.”

She brushed his hair back from his forehead. She couldn’t think of what to say to convince him - or make him convince himself - and so she did not say anything. James closed his eyes and tilted his head into her caressing.

“If it is easier to consider it as such,” he sighed, “you may consider it more of a desire to honor your choice of myself even with your former husband back in the situation.”

A pause.

“That,” said James, “and- God help me-”

He inhaled sharply, going a little red with embarrassment. He was silent again for a moment.

“...I liked your doting on my prick, as you called it.”

Since she had made that brazen declaration in the first place, it was perhaps ironic for Elizabeth to respond to having it tossed back in her face by growing flushed and pressing her nose into her arm.

“- is that what I called it? Ah - well - I suppose - it’s apt, isn’t it?”

“It's what you called it,” he muttered, covering his face, “it will do-”

“Perhaps, seeing as - you liked it - you might -”  She tucked her head onto his shoulder and nudged him, curling up beside him as she did. “ - permit it more frequently-”

“I- yes, I suppose. I… I could, couldn't I?”

James's voice was a little fragile with bafflement. For the first time since very early in their rekindled acquaintance, he felt as though he were looking at her curled up on someone else's shoulder.

She pressed coaxing kisses against his ear, his bearded cheek, and his fingers, which still lay over his face.

“I do dote on you,” she whispered, gently headbutting him and smiling to herself.

“I’m very aware-” James blurted. “I-”

“- like it?” she supplied, stroking his chin again.

“-yes, that too.”

“Oh, and what else, Captain Norrington?”

“I imagine I can permit it. More than that- request it-”

He lowered his hand- he had already been looking out from behind his spread fingers- to look at her properly.

“Oh?” she breathed, delighted.

“Subject to your consent, of course-”

“That’s all I want,” she said, leaning her cheek on him again ecstatically.  “We’ll be - we’ll be just like outlaw lovers in a ballad, huh?  Real lovers - not that we aren’t lovers.  But you’re so - you’re so - you’re so reluctant-”

“Happier than a ballad, I hope-”

“You make me happier than anyone is in a song,” said Elizabeth, forgetting momentarily every eye-roll, every yawn and every bit tongue - she kissed his cheek, enthusiastic and sincere.

“How is that earring practice coming along?” he teased, pushing his hand up into her hair as she kissed him.

“Mmm, touch my hair, James-”

“You needn’t ask-”

She shut her eyes and let him, a smile stealing over her face. James obligingly began gently working out the lingering tangles in her hair with his curved fingers.

“Am I permitted to show you a greater amount of public affection after last night?” he asked.

“- not until Will’s left,” she said, with sudden, unexpected tension.

“Ah,” he said. “A pity, that. I had rather hoped, given your apparent enjoyment-”

“Not until Will’s left,” she repeated in a haze.

“All right,” he said, kissing her on the temple in reassurance.

“I couldn’t -  couldn’t - make him watch that-” she said numbly.

“Then I suppose I shall have to detain you out of his sight more often,” James laughed.

“You - you may have to do that.”

She was stumbling over her words, the swiftness of the unhappy reminder - the heartache it gave her - rendering her briefly useless; she burrowed into his arms and stayed for a moment.  Then she rolled over and flashed him a tired smile.

“It’s going to be difficult to stay off you, even in front of the crew,” she goaded him; “so I shall need more of you than ever when we are alone.”

“I intend to give it,” he said as he lifted her hand to his mouth and kissed it. “As much of me as you will have-”

“I could eat you alive,” she said with a smirk.

“I can think of no happier demise,” said James, beaming.

He was so proud of that, she realized - he really had wanted this, and nothing more.  Or nothing less, perhaps, was a better phrasing.

Elizabeth pulled his hand to her lips now in return. James's smile softened.  

“I am not living for you alone,” he said, “but what joy it is to live for you at all.”

She rubbed his thumb with hers affectionately.

“...yeah, I don’t mind it either,” she managed, blushing again; not the most romantic of affirmations, but sincere.

“... perhaps we ought to maintain a no-poetry policy-”

“We’re pirates. You might be just out of the Navy, James, but for my own part, I don’t think i can hold to policy all that well.”

“You would be amazed to know how similar they feel after a few months at sea,” James conceded, “when we're all sick to distraction of uniforms and protocol.”

“Understood,” she laughed.  “In any case, I cannot allow a no-poetry policy.  I am sorry, James, but the king has said her final word on the matter.”

“Then I shall have to cope with that, it seems,” he said, with an affectionate squeeze of the hand. “My God, Elizabeth. From the way you carry on, I sometimes suspect that even had we married it would have taken mere months before I might as well have wed another sailor.”

“Another boy sailor?”

James blinked, a little taken aback, and collected himself.

“Well,” he said, “if it were still you-“

“I don’t think I would have been quite so much of this then,” she said, a little cautiously - if he liked the thought of it, she did not want to discourage his affection for her; but she could not bid herself lie, either.

“That’s true,” he admitted. “And thinking of the others, I might have so much as grown too accustomed to you-“

“Lord, James, there’s no pleasing you.  You wouldn’t have been excited by my stockings or my corsets, but if I had taken to trousers you’d have bored of that too?”

“I never said a word about stockings-“ he interjected, too quickly.

“Oh,” she said, grinning.

“Elizabeth.”

“Well, indeed, I suppose you did not, though I assumed-”

“Stockings aren’t much for artifice-“

“I thought all of those little feminine trappings disagreed with you.  All of that beribboned nonsense.”

“Not all of it, certainly-“

He pressed his lips together.

“There’s nothing to recommend against a chemise, either,” he said finally. “And I suppose panniers on their own have a degree of charm to balance out the stays-“

Elizabeth’s expression made the rounds between amusement, to incredulity, to exasperation with a startling quickness.

“James Norrington, you ass!” she shouted, hitting him in the shoulder.

“What have I done now?” he protested.

“Perjured yourself - though I should have expected no less from so foul and so black a brigand,” she said, thumping him again.

“You know what I prefer- for heaven’s sake, Lisbet, what do you suppose Lettie wore?”

“You said you didn’t like all of that! You told me so-”

“It’s certainly not my ideal-“

“You said you didn’t like it. You said it had no appeal.”

“Not under a dress, it doesn’t!”

“But we talked about it! We talked about - women, in a state of undress - and you said you didn’t care for those things!”

“I said I don’t care for stays, Elizabeth, I was quite specific-“

“I am certain I asked after everything else,” she grumbled.  “I remember-”

“It’s of no consequence regardless,” he said heatedly. “I know how I prefer you.”

“Naked as the day I was born - that’s very glamorous-”

“In men’s clothing with scarcely anything left to be imagined,” he muttered, averting his eyes.

“In men’s clothing- you have to imagine everything in order to even believe there is a woman under them in the first place,” she exclaimed, exasperated.

“Not her legs- and not her arse, either-“

Elizabeth opened her mouth, but no sound came out this time. James shrugged uncomfortably.

She found herself blushing.  And trying not to smile.  And smiling.

“Really?” she asked, feeling the corner of her mouth tugging upward in spite of her best intentions.

“Yes,” he groaned.

“You like looking at - ?“

“Oh, my God- yes, all right? I know what I prefer-”

Elizabeth looked radiantly happy.  She could barely hear him.

“That is so - that is too kind of you.”

“Did you really believe that was all a lie?” he asked, frowning in concern.

“I thought you felt very little and wanted me to stop accusing you of it,” she laughed.

“For heaven's sake- just because I found a little to delight in when Lettie wore all of that-”

“You still seem very….” She hesitated to repeat the word ‘cool’ to him.  “...restrained about matters of preference,” she finished delicately.

“I don't wish to be churlish-”

“I think I’d like you to be a little bit of a brat to me sometimes,” said Elizabeth with a nudge.  “Just to make up for the way you are most of the time.”

James laughed a little tiredly.

“Lettie hardly had your abundance of hair, either,” he said, “and yet you know how I feel about that.”

“Mm, yes. The one thing on which we are in absolute agreement,” she said, pulling it to the side and scrunching it absentmindedly.  “I have very wonderful hair.”

James reached out and stroked it.

“Hers was a very pale blonde. She tinted it red and cut it around here-”

He touched about halfway down Elizabeth's neck.

“-filled it with switches lest anyone pulled on it, to spare her neck the strain. A rather grim occupational hazard, really. Don't tell her I told you that, if you ever meet her.”

Elizabeth pulled a face unintentionally.  “Do you think she would like me?”

“I would hope so,” said James. “It’s not as though we parted on poor terms; I can’t imagine her bearing you any ill-will.”

He sat up a little, to gain better access to her hair, and began working on some of the more stubborn snarls.

“I hope that this does not lessen your opinion of me.”

“What now?”

“My selective honesty, compounded by the impropriety of that which I chose to omit.”

“...the fact that you are only sometimes honest?  James, everyone is only sometimes honest.  I think Captain Barbossa is only sometimes partially honest, and he does his best not to be.”

“In matters of the heart,” he said gently, “it seems a rather cold detail to leave out. I did not realize it upset you to think I cared so little for all of that.”

“I don’t imagine you would,” she said, reconciliatory with private alarm, realizing at once she had made him think she was much more hurt than she was.  “I have never appeared to value my feminine attributes, such as I can be said to have them - why would you think I did?”

“You commented often enough on my alleged preference for a boy and my morbidity that I thought you must have thought I regretted your sex in the first place-”

“I think you regret that you want me - physically, anyway. I think you wish love were an entirely spiritual affair.”

“Not now I don't-”

“But you did.  Even after we got together.”

“Is that so disappointing?”

“Of course it was.”

“You were coming off of the end of your marriage- because of myself, I might add. I did not dare to get ahead of myself.”

“You remember how I was in Tortuga,” said Elizabeth, looking towards him in exasperation. “How badly I wanted you.”

“I know that,” he said. “But I did not know you would choose me in the end.”

“Whose heart were you protecting?”

James swallowed. “Both, I thought.”

She brushed her finger over his heart with the ghost of a smile.

“I’ll protect it, always,” she said in a soft voice.  “...your feelings, on the other hand, I cannot promise anything-”

“Don't worry about that,” he said. He released her hair to clasp her hand instead, with what he hoped was a reassuring smile.

There was an awkward silence between them for a moment, which James broke with a small cough.

“I know I ought to dress and go out,” he said, “but I find I lack the impulse. What does Her Majesty suggest?”

“Well, it must be growing close to evening by now,” she said dubiously.  “We may as well.  And perhaps we’ll linger when the sun goes down.”

“Mm.” He stretched his back with a grimace. “I can only hope I don't look too dissipated.”

“The more dissipated, the better,” she said, leaning on his chest to look down into his eyes.  “You’re a pirate now.”

James scoffed. “Then perhaps we ought to change the standard.”

“No, I like the standard- it’s less work.”

“Suit yourself,” he laughed.

“I do,” she said loftily.

“Dissipation may be a bridge too far,” said James, settling in comfortably to hold her a moment longer. “We’ll have to find some adjacent adjective.”

He pushed his hair from his face, with the dim thought that he understood a little better now how much she could like how much he loved hers- even if she had specified their feelings were not quite matched in that regard. He wondered, vaguely, how long it could grow without the near-curl dropping out of it, and if he could get accustomed to not tying it back…

“What's the next nearest thing to dissipated? Tarnished?”

“That will do,” she said, muzzily.  The bed seemed hot and somewhat sticky, but she didn’t want to get up and get dressed, didn’t want to be released.

“Tarnished, then. I can be content with tarnished.” He dipped his hand around to the inside of her thigh, as though to make a point.

“Mmmmm, content indeed.”

“More than content, really,” he said, after a short pause. “Elizabeth-”

“James?”

“I hope that with our misunderstandings cleared away, you might permit me to ask for your attentions… often.”

“Which attentions?” she asked, stirring her fingers in his hair in the echo of a question.

James met her eyes.

“All of them. And- mine in return.”

“You want to ask for your own affections?” pressed Elizabeth, clearly amused.

“To give them, at least-”

“I do like your attentions,” she said in a low, baiting voice.

“And to receive yours,” said James, very seriously.

“You might not realize what you are opening yourself up to,” she said, creeping closer to him.

“How would you have me prepare myself, then-”

“I wouldn’t,” she teased, and kissed him.

“Mmm. I shall remain alert, then,” he said, with the ghost of a laugh.

She explored his mouth with her tongue, pushing him back onto the bed and leaning over him.  Her hair fell over him in a curtain of tangles. James looked up at her, guileless and joyful.

“What is it?”

“I love you, obviously,” she said, looking down into his eyes and snorting.

“Is that all?” James scoffed, too seriously to mean it.

“I love you and I don’t want to leave this bed,” she amended in apology.

“Oh, thank heaven. Neither do I.”

“Let’s forget today ever happened.  Like we slept right through it and go on deck tomorrow bright and early and express shock that anyone would wonder how we missed a full day, since all we remember is All Hallow’s Eve, and drinking enough to be sick.”

“Clever,” he laughed. “Agreed, then, save the part about pretending none of this happened. I want to treasure today in my heart as the day on which I feel we came to a stronger understanding.”

“James,” she said flatly.

“What is it?”

“You sound like a 90-year-old barn owl.”

“I don't want to forget today,” he said, with a resigned sigh.

“A stronger understanding, really? Because I-”

“-I feel we’re on the same page, at last, as concerns car-”

Too formal, still. James caught himself and had to take a moment to flake the excess ornamentation away from his words, until his feelings beneath them were exposed.

“Where fucking is concerned,” he said, with an embarrassed precision. “You don't understand how often I think of it- dwell on it-”

Elizabeth’s exasperation softened to be reminded that James was, after all, only a man - and a man she had lain with many times over now, to great mutual satisfaction, to boot.  It was pitifully easy to forget sometimes.

“You hide it rather better than most men do,” she said gently.

“Thank God for that,” he scoffed. “But I will… try… to hide it perhaps less-”

“Not in front of others,” said Elizabeth, a little mortified.

“Of course not! Let's not get ahead of ourselves-”

“But when we’re… alone together?”  She bit her lip hopefully.

“Oh- yes, darling, yes-”

“Then - that will be - very much to my preference,” she said delicately. The irony of her speaking like an owl did not go unappreciated, and Elizabeth cracked a smile reflecting on it.  “At the very least, I shall have no reason to think of you as morbid.”

James smiled a little tightly but had nothing else to add after that. He stretched, groaned, and fell back in place with a yawn.

“Is there enough water left in the basin to wash, do you suppose?”

“The important bits,” she said unruffledly.

“I see,” said James. “Do we plan on dirtying ourselves again?”

His hand in her hair tangled itself in firmly enough to give her a possessive little tug. “I could always wash you myself, but I fear that would end in defeating the purpose.”

“Mm-” she laughed.  “What a tempting offer.”

“If you were to take it up-”

(He kissed her collarbone.)

“-might you reciprocate?”

“You sure you want that?” she asked lightly, with a knowing smirk.

“...I do,” he said softly, the smirk momentarily falling from his face to be replaced by a look of utter open vulnerability.

[marvelous-imagining]

Lost Years

MASTERLIST

A/N: It’s been too long, I know... But here’s part 15! Not my best work, I’m not 100% sure about how it turned out. I didn’t really know how to continue this story but this is the best I could come up with. I wrote two different versions but I guess this one is a bit more to my liking. Hopefully it’s enjoyable. Well, grab a snack, get comfortable because this one is gonna be a long one.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x female!reader

Words: 5,113

Warning: some strong language, mentions of sex

Previously: Part 14

Part 15

"He's here," you announced after looking at your phone, a text message is displayed on the screen. "I'm gonna go get him."

Bucky groaned from the couch beside you, letting his head fall back. "We can still send him back if you change your mind."

You sent him a glare before standing up from the couch and circling it from behind. Before you walked past Bucky, you leaned down to place a quick kiss on his forehead and began walking to the elevator.

"I'm serious!" Bucky called out after you.

You turned around after pressing the button for the elevator. He had his arm laid on the backrest with his chin resting on his hand. You couldn't help but chuckle at the sight, he looked absolutely adorable.

"I know you are," you said, beginning to walk backwards after hearing the elevator arriving at your floor. "But he's coming whether you like it or not."

Bucky looked at you with disappointment written across his features. "I never thought you'd choose another man over me."

You rolled your eyes, shaking your head. "You can be so dramatic at times, you know that?"

He narrowed his eyes to show you how he didn't appreciate your comment but you could see a small smile forming on his lips as the elevator doors closed. You waited patiently, tapping your foot on the floor as the elevator descended to the first floor. After it stopped and the doors opened, you saw Tanner waving at you from the front door. You smiled, strolling over to him and pulling him in for a hug.

"Hey, Tanner," you said, squeezing him tightly before pulling away. "I missed you."

He smiled, nudging your shoulder with his hand. "Missed you, too," he said before heading towards the elevator with you following right behind. He looked around the lobby, letting out a whistle in surprise. "This place really is something... And you get to live here... My, God."

"Tanner, I already told you, we're not living here. So stop it."

"Come on," he laughs, crossing his arms as he leaned on the wall of the elevator as soon as he stepped in, "You have no intention of leaving this place and go back to your tiny apartment."

"Oh, is that so?"

"Yes. Admit it. You want to live here."

You shook your head, turning away from him and facing the closing door.

"See, you can't even lie and say you don't."

"Tanner, I swear to God if you don't shut up about this I will throw you out."

"No you won't," he scoffed.

"Fine. You got me there," you sighed in defeat. The elevator doors opened to the floor you previously came from and you turned to Tanner with a smirk. "I'll have James do it."

You saw Tanner gulp but he shook it off quickly, shrugging and chuckling as if he wasn't bothered.

"I'm serious. And I'm positive he would be more than happy to do it."

Tanner nodded, rolling his eyes. "Fine, I'll behave."

"Good. Now, come on."

You both exited the elevator and were met with Ava who was walking up to you, arms up and a wide smile spread on her face.

"Hey, baby," you smiled and scooped her up in your arms. "Did you have fun with uncle Sam and uncle Steve?"

"Were they babysitting her or something?" Tanner asked.

"Yeah they watched her for a few hours," you said as you took Ava's small hand in yours and kissed your way up her arm. This made the little girl squirm and giggle which made you laugh as well. You turned to Tanner who was giving you a knowing look.

"Why, I wonder..."

"Do I need to throw him out, yet?" A deep voice asked from behind you.

You smiled. "No, no... At least not yet," you assured as you felt Bucky's metal arm wrap around your back.

"Jeez, guys... Way to make a person feel welcome," Tanner muttered. "Bucky," he said, acknowledging the super soldier's presence as a greeting.

"Tanner," Bucky replied, "Don't cause any trouble, okay?" He said, almost a bit menacingly.

Tanner saluted Bucky with a smile. "Yes, sir."

While you were watching the two interact, amused, you didn't notice someone else entering the room until you heard them clear their throat behind you. You turned around to be met with Steve.

You could hear Tanner gasping at the sight of the blonde super soldier.

"C-cap... Captain!" He spoke with a much deeper voice than normal.

You turned to him, amused by the flustered look on his face. You bit your tongue to prevent yourself from saying anything.

"So, you're Tanner?" Steve asked, offering his hand for a shake. "Steve Rogers," he introduced himself politely.

"C–captain, uhm," Tanner began to stammer, blushing.

"Please, call me Steve."

"Steve," Tanner said breathlessly, letting out a sound that you were sure was a giggle.

You couldn't help it anymore, you couldn't possibly keep yourself from laughing. Seeing Tanner so flustered by someone was completely new to you. He was usually confident and cocky, but there he was, shaking Steve's hand, a blushing mess.

Tanner shot you a glare as Steve offered a questioning look. You covered your mouth with your hand and turned to Bucky, hiding your face in his chest. You could feel his chest shake slightly with the chuckles he was stifling.

"Nice to meet you, cap–I mean, Steve," Tanner said, pulling his hand away and wiping his sweaty palm on his jeans. He looked up at Steve in complete awe so you decided to butt in before Steve got uncomfortable with Tanner's stares and odd behavior.

"Steve," you said his name so his whole attention would be on you and Tanner could get a second to calm down. "Thank you so much for watching Ava."

"Don't mention it. Anything to give the parents some alone time," he said, sending a smile that almost passed as innocent.

You turned to Bucky and raised a brow.

"I didn't tell him anything, I swear."

"You didn't have to," Steve said before walking away.

You shrugged. "Well, I guess we should have expected they'd know what was up."

"But in the middle of the day?" Tanner spoke up again. "Really?"

You and Bucky both shrugged.

"Couldn't wait until night?"

"Have you seen him?" You asked, gesturing at Bucky. "Look at him and ask that again, I dare you."

Tanner looked Bucky up and down, nodding in agreement. "Okay, you've got a point."

Bucky huffed, taking Ava from you. "Well... I think that's enough of Tanner for today," he said, kissing Ava's head. "I'm just gonna take Ava for her nap, maybe hide in her room for the rest of the day." He glanced at Tanner briefly.

You laughed, placing a hand on his shoulder and leaning up to kiss him gently. "I'll see you later," you said before turning to Ava. You kissed her forehead, letting her do the same to you before Bucky took her away.

You smiled, waving at Ava who was resting her head on Bucky's shoulder until you could no longer see them. You then turned to Tanner who had now gotten rid of all traces of embarrassment from his features. He was back to his confident and cocky self, smirk widely spread on his face.

"So that's why you've been extra chipper today."

You smiled, biting your lip. "I mean, momma has her needs. I need them fulfilled. Sometimes in the middle of the day."

"Well, you got your treat and you seem to be very satisfied so, you should be able to handle some annoyance better than usual."

"What?" You asked, the smile turning into a frown.

"Okay, about your living situation..."

"Tanner, I'm not having this discussion with you again!" You groaned, running a hand over your face. "I'm running out of things to say!"

"You don't have to say anything," Tanner said calmly while slinging a hand over your shoulders. He began guiding you towards the couch, pushing you down gently so you were sitting down before he joined you. "You don't have to say anything because I'm going to be the one doing the talking. So listen up, babe."

You huffed in annoyance and crossed your arms but decided to stay quiet and hear what he had to say. You were a bit curious but didn't really want it to show. You nodded, waving your hand as if gesturing for him to go on and begin talking.

"Why are you so afraid of admitting you want to move in together with him?" He asked, looking at you as if he was waiting for an answer. You stayed quiet a little too long for his liking and he continued, "Now's the time you say something back."

"I thought you told me I don't have to say any–"

"Now's not the time to be a wiseass, Y/N," he said, voice firm and low.

Your eyes widened slightly and your muscles tensed as you looked away from him. Suddenly feeling uncomfortable, you muttered, "I didn't realize you were so serious about this."

"Of course I'm serious about this. Y/N, you're my friend. I want you to be happy and I've never seen you happier than you are right now. Admit it, since you found out you were pregnant, or at least since you reunited with Bucky again, all you've wanted was to have your little family together."

You shook your head, not as to proving him wrong but because this was a discussion you seemed to have continuously. No matter how many times you put an end to the conversation, Tanner would always find another time to bring it up.

"You always waited around for Bucky. Even though you went on a couple of dates, you never gave anyone else a chance. He's the love of your life. You know nothing would make you happier than officially living under the same roof as him. Don't let anything stand between you and your happiness."

You sat in silence after his little speech, staring at him almost dumbfounded. Your mouth was slightly open, eyes wide and eyebrows shot up to the skies. "Tanner, I..." You began quietly, voice gentle and careful. "I never expected you to... care about this so much. I always thought you just liked teasing me."

He shrugged, "Comes with being uncomfortable with expressing any emotion," he laughed to play it off as a joke although there was some truth behind his words. "You know me, humor is a defense mechanism. I'm usually bad with heart to heart sort of thing..." He scratched the back of his neck, embarrassed.

You smiled, placing a hand on his shoulder and squeezing it softly. He looked at you, sheepish smile on his lips. "Thank you for your concern," you said, genuinely meaning it, "but we're still not going to move in here."

Tanner groaned dramatically, pushing himself off the couch and turning to you in exasperation. "Why do you have to be so difficult!"

"I'm not being difficult! You're the one who's trying to interfere in our relationship!"

"Because you are so goddamn stubborn and won't admit to what you really want!" He yelled, surprising you with the loudness of his voice. "You know, it's women like you that make me thank my lucky stars that I'm gay."

You laughed, knowing he was joking, at least a little bit. He always had time for his jokes, no matter the mood he was in. Although you did chuckle at his joke, you still gave him an annoyed glare and saw him sending you one back.

"I'm just trying to help you," he said, shaking his head. "Where's the bathroom?"

You pointed to the direction of the nearest toilet, telling him he'll find it without further instructions.

You sat back, leaning your head on the backrest and closed your eyes. You breathed in and let it out with a sigh. "God, he can be a pain in the ass," you muttered to yourself, enjoying the few minutes of peace until he'd come back.

Meanwhile you were in the lounge area alone waiting for Tanner to come back, Bucky was still in Ava's room, just sitting on the floor with his back resting on the crib rail. He looked to his left, eyes finding his hand that was resting between the wooden bars. Ava had her fingers wrapped around Bucky's metal finger as she slept soundly, grip tightening and loosening every once in a while as the sound of a pacifier moving in and out of her mouth and her soft breaths filled the otherwise quiet room.

Bucky dug into his pocket to look at the time on his phone. It hadn't been too long since he had left the lounge area to leave you and Tanner alone.

He huffed and placed his phone back in his pocket. He didn't really have anything to do. He could have left the room and join you but he really didn't want to spend time with Tanner. He figured he'd have to get to know Tanner sooner or later but he wanted to avoid that as long as possible.

There was a knock on the door which made Bucky's head shot up. The door slowly opened and a head peeked inside. To Bucky's dismay, it was Tanner.

"James?" Tanner called out from the ajar door.

"Bucky," the super soldier corrected, "and be quiet, Ava's sleeping."

"Sorry," Tanner said, opening the door further and stepping inside. "Bucky, I need to talk to you."

"Really?" Bucky frowned, visibly showing how he would rather do anything else. "Do you really need to?" He asked, hoping Tanner would backtrack.

"Yeah, I really do," Tanner replied with a sigh and closed the door before walking closer to Bucky.

Bucky cursed under his breath and prayed that someone would come in and interrupt whatever was about to happen.

"Listen, I need to talk to you about Y/N."

Suddenly Bucky seemed much more interested. "What about her?" He asked, worried.

Tanner sat down in front of Bucky with his legs crossed, elbows resting on his knees while staring at Bucky with firm eyes. "You want her to move in here, don't you?"

Bucky let out a laugh. "What?" He asked.

"Do you not want to live with her?"

"I-I didn't say that."

"Do you want to live with her?"

"How is this any of your business?" Bucky asked, scoffing as he adverted his gaze away from the male sitting opposite him.

"Answer the question."

Tanner's voice was so demanding yet quiet that it almost made Bucky tense up. He wasn't intimidated by Tanner at all but he was a bit uncomfortable about having this discussion with him.

Bucky thought about it for a second. He was suddenly reminded of something that happened a few nights before.

Bucky had walked into his bedroom with Ava in his arms. He had been watching Ava for a couple of hours while you had been working. He had knocked on the door before stepping in, expecting you to be working on your laptop. To his surprise, he had instead been met with you packing a bag.

He had stayed at the doorway, holding Ava who was reaching her arms towards you. He had been confused as to why you were packing. At first he hadn't realized why you would be packing a bag. It was after he had asked and you answered that he realized you were packing your things to go back to your apartment.

It had taken him a second before he remembered you actually had an apartment of your own. He had grown so accustomed to you and Ava staying with him and the rest of the team that he had completely forgotten about the fact that you weren't officially living with them.

He had somehow managed to persuade you into staying a couple of more days. He had sensed that you were scared about going back so it wasn't hard to make you stay.

You hadn't brought up leaving since.

He was thankful you hadn't. He really didn't want you to go. He knew that if you left, it would hurt him. Now that he had been living with you and Ava under the same roof, he felt like he wouldn't be able to live without you there.

"Yes, I do," he answered to Tanner's question, head hanging low as he stared down at his lap.

He really did want you to move in the compound. He hadn't asked you to, though. The reason for that was that you had told him you didn't want to rush into anything.

"Rushing makes things worse, we can't just spontaneously take big steps like... moving in together or something." Were your words exactly.

He just didn't want to scare you off. You had made a big deal about not rushing into anything.

"Great. So ask her to move in."

"What?" Bucky asked again, surprised. "I can't just ask her that! Especially after all that... talk about the future. And why are we even talking about this? Why do you care if I want to–"

"Because she's my friend and I care about her," Tanner interrupted Bucky before he could continue. "I can't believe I have to try to convince you too... I want her to be happy. Being with you makes her happy. I've never seen her as happy as she is here with you. She wants this. She wants to stay here with you. I'm sure you're aware of how unsafe she feels about the mere thought of going back to her apartment."

Bucky nodded, "She always flinches when her apartment is mentioned. She's terrified of going back. She'd never admit it, though."

"Yeah... You've gotta talk to her. It's better for all three of you," Tanner stopped as his gaze shifted to sleeping Ava, "if you just move in together. Also, it would give me the opportunity to visit this place more," he finished with a wide grin.

Bucky shook his head. "And you were just about to convince me," he muttered humorously.

Tanner chuckled. "I'm serious, though. You two need to talk about this."

Bucky nodded, agreeing. He turned to Tanner, eyeing him for a second. "I never knew you could be so... serious about something."

"Yeah, I keep surprising people left and right today," Tanner said while wiping an imaginary droplet of sweat from his forehead. He then stood up, sending Bucky a small smile and a wave. "Well, I'm probably gonna go now. My work here is done. Talk to your girlfriend," he pointed at Bucky before walking to the door.

As the door swung open, Bucky could hear your voice from the hall. You were calling out Tanner's name.

"Tanner? Where the hell are you?" He heard you ask with a frustrated tone in your voice. "I swear to God if you're going through someone's room, I'm gonna–"

"I'm here, about to leave. Don't worry, I didn't go through anyone's things. I usually like to build a trusting bond with people before going through their stuff and finding out their secrets."

There was a second of silence.

"Why were you in Ava's room?"

Tanner shot a glance at Bucky before he turned away again. "I had a little talk with your man."

"What did you say to him?" You hissed, stomping over to him. As you got close enough, you glanced into the room and your gaze met Bucky's. Your eyes widened slightly and you turned to Tanner again, jaw clenched. "What did you do?"

"Helped you out. You're welcome," he said before pushing you into the room. He sent a wave to both you and Bucky before closing the door. "You'll thank me later!" Was heard from behind the door before the room fell quiet.

Bucky sat, still and quiet as he glanced at you. He saw your shoulders tense and fist clench before you turned around to face him.

"So, you talked to Tanner?" You asked, crossing your arms and looking down at the floor.

"Well, yeah..."

"You know, he can be such a jokester sometimes," you forced a laugh, "he just comes up with these random topics and–"

"Y/N," Bucky interrupted you, seeing the fake smile on your face disappear. You turned to him, gulping. "We should talk."

"Damn," you sighed, walking over to sit beside him on the floor. "Listen, whatever Tanner said, you shouldn't take it seriously. You know him, he's always kidding around."

Bucky shook his head. "He really didn't seem to be in the kidding kind of mood today."

"Yeah but you know Tanner, he... uhm..." You began, looking at Bucky to see him shaking his head at you. You sighed, shoulders slumping. "Why bother? There's no use lying to you."

He smiled but it soon vanished and a more serious look took over his face. His brows furrowed slightly, causing creases to form on his forehead. The ends of his lips flickered downward in a frown. He was quiet, letting his gaze run along his arm until his gaze settled on his finger that was wrapped up in Ava's small hand.

You followed his gaze, smiling softly before you reached your hand out to Ava, stroking her cheek gently before pulling your hand back. You turned to Bucky again, seeing his gaze slowly moving to you.

"Should I expect more stalling or—"

The door swung open again and both you and Bucky turned to the ajar door to see Tanner peaking his head in.

"One more thing," he said, clearing his throat. "What's Steve's situation? Love life wise."

"Aren't you dating Wyatt?" You asked, surprised.

"Yeah but... you know, I've gotta have a backup plan," he shrugged. "But like... What is he? Straight? Gay? B—"

"Get. Out." You said through gritted teeth, pointing your finger towards the door before turning it to the direction the elevator was in.

"Okay, okay..." Tanner sighed, defeated. "Let's talk about this another time. Bye!" He said and closed the door.

"Oh, my God," Bucky whispered, rolling his eyes.

"I can't believe him..." You shook your head, irritated. "I mean Steve's hot, so I understand where Tanner's coming from but this is not the time!"

"You think Steve's... hot?" Bucky asked quietly.

"Are you really surprised?" You chuckled. "I thought you knew super soldiers were kind of my type," you joked.

Bucky shook his head with a bit of a chuckle of his own.

The laughter soon died down and an uncomfortable silence surrounded you once again. You sat beside him, fidgeting with your hands nervously as you dreaded for the conversation you were about to have.

You turned to look at Bucky, seeing that he wasn't really looking excited about what was to come either. You both laughed at the awkwardness, looking away shortly.

"Penny for your thoughts?" Bucky asked after a while, a gentle smile on his face to make you less nervous.

You chewed on your bottom lip. You sighed before speaking up. "I'm just... I'm scared of having this conversation."

"Why are you scared?"

"Because I'm afraid we're going to disagree."

"Disagreements aren't the end of the world."

"No, I know that. I'm totally fine with disagreeing with you about things. I don't expect us to agree on everything but this is huge and if we aren't on the same page here, it could... do some serious damage to our relationship."

Bucky picked up on the fast pace you spoke with, the way your breathing was quickening and becoming heavy. He saw you running your hands over your face in frustration. It seemed like this topic had been on your mind for a long time and it had bothered you a lot too.

"I just... Just because Tanner thinks we should move in together, it doesn't mean we have to think so. It's totally fine if we think it's too fast, it's absolutely okay if we don't want to take this step right now."

"When you say 'we', are you talking about us or yourself only?" Bucky asked carefully.

"What?" You asked, surprised.

Bucky sighed. "Y/N, do you realize how much I actually want you to stay here? I really don't want you to leave. I don't want you to go back to your apartment."

"R-really?" You asked, seeming very surprised.

"Listen, doll..." He began, turning his body to you as much he was able to without breaking Ava's grasp on his finger. "I love you. So much. I love being with you, I love waking up with you, I love seeing Ava bright and early in the morning... Even if she is cranky and fussy." He chuckled, seeing you smile a bit as well. He took your hand in his and saw your gaze dropping to your hands, fingers lacing through one another's.

The small gesture, so simple yet so meaningful, made you shiver. It was a nice shiver, tiny shocks of electricity running through your body. It didn't give you an intense reaction, just a small one but it made you feel giddy nonetheless.

"I hate being away from you... Do you remember few days ago when you were packing your bag? Before that, I hadn't even thought about you going back to your apartment. You being here has become so normal to me, I guess I figured you would just... stay."

"I thought maybe you were getting sick of us being here," you confessed quietly. Bucky turned to you, eyes wider than usual. He looked almost offended by your comment. "Not in the sense you wanted us to leave but... You've been with us almost every second of each day ever since we came here, I thought you might want some time alone."

"That doesn't mean you'd have to leave," he pointed out, chuckling lightly. "Y/N, I want you to stay. I don't want you to go back to that apartment alone. You know you don't want to either. You don't feel safe there anymore."

You looked down, almost ashamed. Bucky noticed and removed his hand from yours only to lift it to your chin. With his thumb on top of your chin and the backs of his fingers grazing your throat softly, he lifted your head up. His gaze met yours and the loving smile on his face made your stomach fill with butterflies, the previously felt little shocks running through your body returned once again.

"Stay," he pleaded. "Please?"

"But, James... What about the plan?" You asked quietly. "About not rushing into anything?"

"Screw the plan," he said with a wide smile. "We have a kid together, how much rushing is there to be done anymore?"

You laughed, shrugging as if you thought he had a point.

"Please?" He repeated again, leaning in while pulling your face closer to his. His lips grazed yours only lightly. You closed your eyes, waiting for him to kiss you only to whimper in disappointment when he pulled away. "I wouldn't be asking this if I wasn't sure you wanted to move in as well."

"James..." You almost whined. He was teasing you, trying to get you to stop being stubborn and just agree with him. It was definitely speeding up the process.

"Wouldn't it be better for her as well?" He asked, nodding his head at Ava.

"It would," you caved in. "It definitely would. But do you really want to do this?"

"Yes, one hundred percent," he answered right away.

"I've gotta be honest with you..." You started, smiling. "I didn't expect you answer so confidently so fast."

"I know what I want," he said, matter-of-factly. "I want you two here, safe and sound with me."

"You really want this? You're not doing this just for our sake?" You asked, eyes moving to your sleeping daughter once again.

"I want this," Bucky assured, moving his hand to the back of your neck, "I really, really want this. Don't you want this?"

You gulped, nodding. Your eyes met his loving ones and you smiled wide. "I do," you whispered, placing your hands on his shoulders, balling the material of his t-shirt in your palms in anticipation. "I really do," you said with a relieved sounding breathy laugh.

Bucky pulled you closer, hand on the back of your neck, guiding you to him. His lips finally made contact with yours and you sighed happily. Your hands moved into his hair, pulling him as close as possible.

When you finally pulled away, you let your hands fall down to his firm chest that was now heaving due to his heavier breaths. You licked your lips, smiling as you rested your forehead on his.

"You know, you were pretty firm with me earlier. I was kind of surprised."

"Is that a... good or a bad thing?" He asked, curiousness lacing his deep voice.

You pulled back, walking your fingers up his chest to his shoulder. "Good thing. Definitely a good thing."

Bucky took a notice of the way your voice dropped, became much slower and deeper. He also noticed the look in your eyes had changed. It wasn't purely just a look of joy, there was more... excitement in your gaze.

"Really?" He asked, amused. "That good, huh?"

"You know I like a man who can be firm and take control."

"Yes, I do," he smiled, leaning in to kiss you again. This time, the kiss was more heated, urgent. "Let's go," he said, gently pulling his hand away from Ava's grasp before standing up.

You went over to the door while Bucky stayed behind. He turned to Ava, running his human hand over her head gently. He smiled, whispering, "I'm so happy you're staying."

He leaned down to place a small kiss on her head, glancing at his daughter one last time before turning around. He saw you standing at the doorway, bouncing your foot on the floor in anticipation while nodding your head towards your shared bedroom across the hall.

Bucky's smile widened as he strolled over to you. You squealed in surprise when he bent down to reach the back of your thighs and lift you up in his arms.

"Now, let us grownups go celebrate," he said with a mischievous grin before he walked out into the hall, closing the door and going straight to your bedroom.

What you were both oblivious to, was Sam who was standing in the hall rolling his eyes after seeing you rush to your room. He heard the door close with a lot of force and sighed. "Again?" He eyed the now closed door with an arched bow. "Animals," he muttered under his breath before escaping the scene, leaving you two to celebrate.

Next: Part 16

Want to be on my tag list?

[offshore-defxxx]

Part One

The Lebron James of Beer Pong

“Ughhhhh, I hate going out. It’s so much work!” Your friend says as she looks in the mirror and pulls off yet another top she didn’t like.

“Isn’t this a house party that Jaebeom’s friend is throwing? Plus, house parties are fun. It’ll be a good time.” You say from the bathroom while you’re curling your hair. You were in town visiting your best friend Diana. You’ve known each other since high school but were complete opposites.

She’s ambition and tough. Graduated college two years early and had successfully launched a booming jewelry business. Set to go international within the year so she said. She was only a year older than you at 23.

You, on the other hand, is a 5th year senior at a well-known university in the south. And the only reason you’re a 5th year senior is because you decided last semester to pick up a double major in biology AND computer science because “it was only another 7 credits anyway”. At least. that’s what you talked yourself into believing. But you enjoy being in college. You especially enjoy beer pong at house parties.

You glance at your phone and saw the time.

“Hey Di, let’s do another shot!”

As if she read your mind Diana is already walking into the bathroom with a bottle of Captain and her shot glass.

“Cheers! I hope you get laid tonight.” Diana fills your glass to the rim with the dark liquor as you cringe, but you down it like a champ and chase with the beer you’ve been babysitting since you started getting ready.

Your last relationship ended bitterly, and you swore up and down that you will never - ever - date a man again. They’re all the same. Useless and nothing but grown babies. The only thing they were good for is sex. Which, by your count had been almost 6 months since the last time you had any.

Diana is in a happy relationship with some r&b music producer she met at a coffee shop while in college. She loves to tell the story of how they met because it sounds like what happens in the movies. Not that you blame her. Her and Jaebeom had to be what every girl wishes their relationship would be. Considering the way Jaebeom looks and Diana’s uncharacteristically positive attitude since they’ve been together tells you the dick is good. Which is yet another facet of your lives that contrast with each other, but Diana deserves to be loved the way Jaebeom loves her.

You could feel the warmth of the liquor course through your body and you’re happy to see the Asian flush hasn’t reared its ugly head as you look in the mirror. You finish curling your hair as  Diana calls you out to leave. You both down another shot before heading out. Her cheers earlier in the night echo in the back of your mind.

“So Jaebeom said a lot of his friends from the industry will be there tonight so if you see anyone you’re interested in let me know! I’ll get him to introduce you.”

“Of course. You know how I like my men, a pretty face with a broken soul. The basic make up of every starving artist and musician.” You say sarcastically as Diana rolls her eyes.

“Thank god we don’t have the same taste in men, but I really do wish you’d quit trying to ‘save’ people. It pisses me off every time I see you throw your entire being into someone’s life knowing it’s going to go nowhere.” Diana says something like this every time we talk about relationships. And in typical Diana manner, she’s usually right.

“Can’t help it man. Everybody needs love. Some just need a little work is all.” You flash her a chastising grin. Another point that the two of you are never on the same page on.

The sound of a heavy bassline fills the air along with the chirping of crickets lets you know you have arrived. The neighborhood street is packed with cars and people are teeming outside. Diana hooks arms with you and pulls you toward the back of the house.

“Diana!!!” A handsome guy shouts as you two round the corner. “Jackson!! Hey!” He gives her a big ol bear hug and picks her up. You know those are her favorite kind of hugs.

“It’s so good to see you! You look great!”

“Thank you! You know what I always say, take care of your health, both physically and mentally. Have you been drinking the organic tea I got you guys last time? And who is this beautiful woman you brought with you?”

You blush at his sudden compliment.

“Ah! This is my best friend from high school! Amy! She’s visiting for the weekend.”

Jackson very obviously checks you out and you could feel your cheeks getting red. Guess you didn’t need any alcohol to do it for you.

“Hi.” You awkwardly stick your hand out not knowing what else to do.

Jackson looks at your hand amusingly and opens his arms wide and gives you a cute tight-lipped smile.

“Amyyyy, a best friend of Diana and Jaebeom is a best friend of mine. Come here.” He closes the distance between you two and picks you up in the same marvelous bear hug he gave Diana. His warm embrace felt incredibly comfortable but strong. Maybe it’s because you haven’t had any physical contact with a man since your break up, but Jackson’s innocent gesture makes you feel very aware of yourself.

“Speaking of Jaebeom, where is he? He stopped replying to my texts like an hour ago.” Diana pursed her lip as she checks her phone.

Jackson lets you go much to your dismay. “He’s inside! Probably by the DJ. You know Jaebeom, he can’t stay away from music. Unless it comes to you of course.”

You find it amusing watching Jackson and Diana interact. He must always be this charming considering Diana is hardly the friendly type. The only reason the two of you became friends is because your mom forced her to be friends with you in your freshmen year of high school and her sense of responsibility got the best of her. You make a mental note to ask Diana about Jackson later when he wasn’t around.

Jackson leads you both to where Jaebeom is and you’re surprised by how many people are inside. This is nothing like the house parties you have been to back at the Hill. Diana grabs your hand as she spots Jaebeom and you both head to the DJ booth.

“Hey babe.” Diana lets you go as Jaebeom wraps his arms around her waist and pulls her close for a kiss. It was disgusting how happy they were together. You literally felt like you were going to vomit.

Diana pulls back briefly, “Jaebeom, Amy here needs to get laid tonight. Do you have any potential suitors in mind? No criminal history, no assholes, no guys with girlfriends.”

He looks up as if he’s reading through a list of people in his mind. The bass was loud but melodic and you could feel each beat vibrate through your body.

After a bit of contemplation, Jaebeom replies, “Ah, I can’t think of anyone off the top of my head, but definitely stay away from Jackson.” He throws a sideways glance at Diana and she laughs.

“What? Why? We ran into him on the way in. He seems really friendly!” You question looking at Jaebeom and your friend.

“That’s EXACTLY why. He’s always to friendly plus -” Diana swats at Jaebeom playfully and laughs again “What? It’s true! You saw how friendly he was with Diana right? Brothers or not, even I get a little jealous when he acts that way.” At this point Diana is bent over laughing. I’m not sure if Jaebeom knew just how head over heels in love Diana is with him. There’s no way she would ever consider anyone but him. But you just smile and promise you won’t even look at Jackson. Feeling a little more like a third wheel than you want to you excuse yourself to get a drink.

You walk purposefully through the throngs of people making sure to throw a glance at every cute guy you see just in case.

You recognize a few people as friends of Diana from photos she’s posted on Facebook and Instagram. A guy your recognize as Bambam was engaged in what must be a super interesting conversation with a taller attractive looking guy and a couple of girls. Bambam works at the coffee shop where Jaebeom and Diana met. He also apparently owns said coffee shop. Leave it to Diana to make friends with the shop owner you thought to yourself.

You finally reach the outdoor mini bar and help yourself to a beer. You easily uncap it with your hand. A trick you learned from one to many shotgun challenges in college. The chill beer and the breeze in the air felt perfect. You hated the heat and the Midwest provided a much-needed reprieve from the humidity that plagues the south. The only thing that could make this night better would be –

“Hey! Will you be my beer pong partner?! Please?”

You are staring into the eyes of the most beautiful stranger you have ever seen. No, in the world.

He waves the ping pong ball in his hand in front of him. You realize this dazzling human being is talking to you. Use your words! The voice in your head tells you. 

“Oh, beer pong? Yeah! I’m great at beer pong!” You mentally pat yourself on the back at how normal you thought you sound. Still not believing that this walking, breathing, talking, angel on earth is asking YOU to be his beer pong partner. You pinch yourself behind your elbow to make sure you aren’t dreaming.

“Ouch.”

“Are you okay? Sorry, did I step on you?” The angel creature was speaking. Okay, not a dream.

“Yeah! No. Sorry. I’m fine. You can step on me. err, I mean, no you didn’t step on me.” You let out an awkward laugh. Idiot.

He lets out a light chuckle. Or perhaps baby angels were singing. You weren’t quite sure.

“I’m Taehyung by the way. But everyone calls me Tae. Thanks for agreeing to be my partner.” He smiles down at you with the most beautiful rectangular smile you have ever seen. You curse your mouth for having teeth that were not worthy.

Again, words. You thought to yourself. Though, you were sure the little voice in your head is actually Diana. The little voice was right.

 “Amy. Just Amy. Not short for anything.” Okay, maybe better words but it’s a start.

 “Amy, nice to meet you.” Tae laughs again. You make a mental note to call your mom later to thank her for talking your dad out of naming you Jack because your name has never sounded so beautiful before.

 You both walk up to the beer pong table to see a game is almost over. You hear Jackson before you see him.

 “KOBE!” He does a little hop and flicks the ping pong ball toward the solo red cup and it goes in without touching the rim. The people watching the game erupt in yelling and start chanting Jackson’s name. He strips off his shirt exposing his extremely toned arms and waves it around his head to celebrate his victory. If you didn’t know any better, you would think that he actually won a real NBA championship with his celebration.

 “He is so cool.” Tae’s soft voice surprises you. You could hear genuine admiration in his voice. You see a soft smile play at his lips and notice he has a small birthmark on the tip of his nose. You wonder if it was possible to be reborn as a birthmark in your next life.

 Jackson spots you mid-celebration and calls out to you.

 “You got next? Are you sure you want to go up against, the KING.” Jackson flexes his arms and strikes a pose.

 “Sorry, ignore him. He was in the junior Olympics for fencing when he was younger and is more competitive than he needs to be.” His partner responds apologetically. You’ve never met him before, but he was also breathtakingly beautiful. You’re not sure what part of the garden of Eden you stumbled into, but you held your breath afraid the tiniest bit of doubt might make it all disappear.

 “He won’t be king for long. I’m ready to redeem myself. Comeback king!” Tae speaks up while your head is still caught in a daze.

 “Yah, V! Did you trick this poor girl into being your partner?” The other man turns to you and shakes his head apologetically.

 “Taehyung here is the WORST beer pong player I have ever seen in my 23 years of life.” Jackson finally has his shirt back on and joins the conversation.

 “Hey now, that’s not true. I have gotten a lot better thanks to playing against you guys.” Tae laughs again but doesn’t deny Jackson’s statement.

 You were keenly aware of just how friendly they all were and felt extremely out of place. Panic must have been showing on your face because Tae put his hand on the small of your back sending fireworks to your cerebellum. You jolt straight up.

 “This is Amy, not short for anything, just Amy. She’s my good luck charm and secret weapon.” Tae says confidently pushing you forward gently. You can feel the blood rush to your face. The zantac you took earlier to prevent the Asian flush was useless against this.

 “She’s the Lebron James of beer pong.” Tae throws a sideways smile at you. Proudly showing you off although you’re not sure where he was getting his information from because you were definitely not the Lebron James of anything.

 “James aint got nothing on Kobe! I didn’t know I’d be seeing you again so soon Amy, once I beat you guys in this round you should give me your number so we can see each other more often.” Jackson flashes you an undeniably charming smile.

 “Hey! She’s my partner. And we’re NOT going to lose.” Tae volleys back. “Come on Amy, let’s show them.” Tae leans forward as does Jackson. The tension is palpable even though you were playing outside. Men and their competitive spirit. You were never one to get so closely involved and yet here you were. You secretly wish Diana would show up like she always does and bail you out, but you knew that wasn’t going to happen.

 “Rock, paper, scissors, shoot!” 

You hear Jackson cry and Tae cheer indicating your team had won the first throw.

 “See what I mean? Good luck charm.” Tae winks at you and casts a sneaky look toward Jackson who is visibly pouting from his loss.

 “Okay! We’ll start!” Tae puts the ping pong ball in front of your lips expectantly. You look at it confused.

 “Blow on it. For good luck.”

 Oh right. You think to yourself. You comply, and Tae takes his shot.

 It goes way over the table almost hitting Jackson in the face. Tae looks mortified and Jackson theatrically falls backward as if he had been suckered punched.

 “Amy, it’s not too late to call it quits! You wouldn’t be the first one. Taehyung hasn’t won a single game all night and no one will partner up with him.” Jackson’s partner says matter of factly.

 You see Tae purse his lips and cross his arms. “I’m getting better okay.” You hear him say under his breath. He is so cute you’d be crazy to not keep playing with him. Besides, even if you two lost you’d still count yourself as a winner in your book for being in such close proximity to what is probably the closest thing to god you’ll ever get.

 You grab another ping pong ball out of the cups in front of you.

 “Don’t worry. Didn’t I tell you I was great at beer pong?” You beam at Tae and your heart swells as you see his face brighten.

 You look across the table at your opponents. Jackson and his partner attempt to distract you with different antics and you can feel the eyes of onlookers as you take a breath. It’s just beer pong you remind yourself. It’s just beer pong. You flick your wrist and the release the ball.

  The people surrounding the table roar as you bounce the ball on the table and land it in a cup. That’s two cups out. Leaving only one left on the table for Jackson’s team. This evens the score for the two teams.

 Tae cheers the loudest and gives you a high five.

 “You’re killing it Amy!!! You didn’t tell me you were LEGENDARY good. When I said you were the Lebron James of beer pong, I said that to chastise Jackson, but I guess I was right!”

 You couldn’t tell anymore if you were blushing or not. The game has been so close, and you were definitely feeling the shots you took before coming. Still, you couldn’t help but feel giddy at Tae’s praise.

 “Jack, Jack! Calm down. Focus Jackson Focus.” Jackson’s partner was coaching him as he makes a spectacle of his stretching. This was the most intense you have seen Jackson all night and knowing you are the cause of it is exciting. Jackson took a couple deep breaths and took aim at your last cup. You and Tae make taunts at Jackson to throw him off. You start rattling off your phone number.

 “5! 5! 5! 2! 3! – “

 “NooooooOOOOOOOoooooooo!!” He misses. And Tae turns to you absolutely glowing.

 “We got this! YOU got this!!!” He grips your shoulders and gives them a quick squeeze. You didn’t realize how tense you are, and you aren’t sure if his touch helped or not. But you are feeling good. Better than good actually, but you didn’t have a word to describe it yet.

 He blows on the ping pong ball before he hands it to you.

 “For good luck.” He smiles his radiant rectangular smile at you that you’ve decided you would die for. Taking the ball in your hand you again face the other end of the table. Never have you felt the weight of your actions weigh so heavily on you before this moment. Over this white plastic ball, in the backyard of a stranger, in a state you’ve only once visited before.

 It’s funny how the world works sometimes, and you half anticipate that the little voice inside your head would say something snarky at this moment the way it always does but nothing comes as you take a deep breath and throw the ball.

 The entire scene seems to slow to a crawl as no one dares to breathe watching the ball float through the air. Jackson looks like he is in the middle of letting out a yell and his partner is mid-jump from anticipation. Tae’s eyes almost look like they are bulging from his face so that he wouldn’t blink as to not miss this moment. The noise around you disappears and all you can hear is the low heavy bassline that fills the air from the music playing from inside the house. The vibrations raise the hair on your skin as you think back to Diana’s cheers at the beginning of the night.

 You watch with the rest of the people outside as your ball hits the rim of the cup threatening to miss. It bounces off on another side of the cup and swirls into the warm beer below.

 All the sounds of the night come rushing back to you.

 The crowd goes batshit wild.

 You made it.

 “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!” You scream as loud as you can. At this moment, this is your crowning life’s achievement. Tae grabs you by the shoulders and gives you a hug not letting go. Jackson’s partner humorously consoles him as he is lying face down on the grass.

 “You did it Amy!!!! We won!!!” Tae is absolutely beaming, and his happiness fills you with so much joy you feel bad for wanting to vomit earlier at Diana’s happiness. You two are still standing unbearably close to each other.

 There was a moment of hesitation in Tae’s eyes as you stare at each other smiling. His eyes lock onto your face. You can feel his eyes trace your features making you suddenly aware of all of your flaws. He brings his face closer to yours as you stop breathing. You’re 99% sure you’re going to die from lack of oxygen with how your night has been going but you beg yourself to stay alive for whatever happens next.

 His lips brush yours and immediately you feel a rush coursing through your body. You feel more intoxicated than you were moments before and hunger for his touch. The gentle pressure of his lips on top of yours is ecstasy and if you could wish any moment from tonight would never end it would be this one. Your lips parted letting in the crisp night air and your lungs fill with oxygen you desperately need. Tae pulls back from you only slightly to search your face for a reaction.

 Assuming you didn’t look as dumb as you feel with his gaze on you he smiles softly and pulls your head to his chest in a warm embrace. Your skin is on fire and you feel like melting. You hate feeling so hot, but you would rather physically set yourself on fire than let go of Tae.

  Diana spots you two from the mini bar outside and her lips curl into a mischievous smile. Oh, she is going to have fun with this.

[thegracecardinal]

a night to regret

who? grace cardinal & vanessa morgan

where? a club & unknown location

when? june december 26th (when this bit of writing takes place) to june december 29th (endings to be described in separate self paras)

what? grace and vanessa go to a club to party, but end up being kidnapped by a rival gang.

trigger warnings? mild violence & kidnapping

Grace tugged her shorts up over her fishnet stockings before pulling a crop top over her bra. Adjusting her top, she glanced around her room before spotting her boots. She shoved her feet into them before hurrying out of her room. Her mom was home for now, resting, and she had a nurse that checked up on her, so Grace didn't feel bad as she grabbed her mom's keys and left out the front door. She drove until she spotted Vanessa on the sidewalk waiting for her. Pulling over, she smiled as the girl got into the passengers seat, "So, you ready to forget?" She sped off towards their destination, "This truly is the best time of the year, eh?" She joked.

Vanessa walked the block past Vince's cladded in a short black cocktail dress and heeled boots. Her tasseled to the side, she made her way to meet Grace at the pick up location. They needed this night out. Even if it was just to dance and get drunk. Vanessa, Grace included but for other reasons, just needed to get away from everything going on (and wrong) in their lives. Vanessa waved into the car once Grace had finally appeared. "Already forgetting," she joked backed. Making herself comfortable in the seat she turned to her friend with a smile, "Which means they'll be the best deals off the year. I hear it's ladies night!"

Grace laughed, glancing over at her friend, “Places still do ladies night?” She shook her head, taking the next turn towards the club, “I guess that means I have to be a lady tonight.” She joked, pulling into the parking lot. Finding a spot to park, she sat back for a moment and looked at her friend now, “You look amazing.” She smiled big before getting out of the car and going around the car to take Vanessa’s arm, “Alright. Let’s get me completely shitfaced. But not so much that I text someone I shouldn’t.” She giggled.

Vanessa "Uh, yeah! They have to find some way to make guys want to come," Vanessa grinned. She shook her head laughing as they pulled into the club area. "And you look great as always," she repeated back, linking her arm with her friend's. She knew it had been a rough couple of months for Grace and wanted to make sure she had the best night away from everything. "It's my friend's birthday! Can we get some tequila shots?" Vanessa yelled as the approached the bar. If there was one thing Vanessa knew, bars were always nicer if they thought it was a birthday.

Grace rolled her eyes, not really interested in guys right now, but she didn't really care who was here tonight. All that mattered was that she was with Vanessa and they were both pretending the outside world didn't exist. As the two giddily made their way into the club and towards the bar, she gave her friend a look, "Oh? Well, happy birthday me!" She laughed, happily taking a shot of tequila and holding it up to cheers, "To... always having each others backs, no matter what." It felt like she was growing distant from everyone she cared about, so she was planning to hold on to Vanessa as best she could. Grace brought the glass to her lips and tipped her head back, her face scrunching up in disgust as she swallowed, "Ugh gross. I need another." She laughed, reaching for another shot.

Vanessa "To us!" Vanessa cheered, clinging then glass with her friends. It took Vanessa a second to complete her shot, shots not really being her thing, before slamming it down on the hennessy," she grinned. She was thankful to have someone like Grace in her life. They were protective of each other, but always allowed the other the room to mess up and grow from things. That's why she always kept Grace around, Grace saw something in Vanessa she hadn't seen within herself. "Psst," she whispered, catching Grace's attention. "Your ten o'clock. James Dean over there keeps giving you the look."

Grace laughed, maybe downing a shot or two too many, definitely too quickly. It was apparent that the tequila was doing its job as Grace started to sway to the music, "I dunno what song this is, but I like it!" She grinned wide. Her eyes followed Vanessa's gaze and she shook her head, "Oh. Oh no no, no more guys for me. I'm pining after Jonah when he doesn't want me anymore, and Hunter kissed me and I liked it a lot. I'm a fucking mess." She snorted, but then her eyes landed on the guy again and she saw his grin, "Okay, he's hot." She shrugged nonchalantly.

Vanessa had pregamed a bit before getting her so it felt like that last Hennessy shot had really got to her. Her body felt calm and everything felt comfortable for the first time in a long time. She popped out of her euphoria for a moment hearing Grace's tale, grabbing another shot to process it all. "Okay first of all hate baby Hollingsworth, you can do better. Secondly, we're not thinking of anyone from outside these walls tonight. You don't hear me out here pinning over Eli right?" She paused realizing her name drop, "You didn't hear that. Come on let's dance! Show James Dean over there what he's missing out on if he doesn't buy us a drink!"

Grace smirked, "You hate Hunter? Not surprising." She giggled, realizing the boy could be pretty annoying if you didn't know him well enough. Her eyes widened and she grabbed Vanessa's arm, "Wait, Eli?! What? I'm so... What???!" She shook her head in shock, "But.." Grace blinked a few times before she looked around and sneakily stole a shot from the people beside them. Downing the liquid, she nodded, "Alright. Fine." She rolled her eyes and pulled Vanessa into the crowd with her. As they danced, she noticed more than one set of male eyes on them and her eyebrows furrowed with curiosity, "Do we look dumb or something? Why are there so many staring?"

Vanessa "But if we're being honest I hate most elite rich kids at this place, so it makes no difference," Vanessa shrugged. She chewed on the inside of her lip before finally answering. "He's... interesting," Vanessa smiled, not truly knowing the status of Eli and Grace since their kiss. Once they were in the middle of the dance floor, Vanessa felt all her inhibitions floating away as her hips swayed to the music. She didn't stop her dancing on account of Grace's comment. "Not to toot my own horn, but I am pretty hot," Vanessa laughed, her eyes following where Grace was looking. "They probably don't have the confidence to come up to us so they think staring is a better option," Vanessa answered, not thinking too much of the eyes. "You're hot. I'm hot. Don't pay them any mind. You're gonna make me enjoy this buzz alone?"

Grace "I get it. Rich people suck." She snorted. Her eyebrows rose, but she said nothing more about Eli. Her eye was on Jonah and that was it. She lazily danced to the music, her eyes closing halfway as she twirled in more ways than one. A laugh fell from her mouth, "Obviously you're hot." Grace eyed a few of the men, things spinning a little too much for her to really see their faces, especially with how dark it was, "Do.... Does.... He looks familiar, right?" She questioned, both herself and Vanessa, "One, I am not hot. Two, I am very much enjoying."

Vanessa nodded, not wanting to dwell on her distain for the Hollingsworths for too long. "Miles' isn't too bad," she shrugged. Her laugh turned into a loud giggle hearing Grace's confirmation. "Real recognize real," she grinned. Before she could say anything, one of the guys that was with Grace's admirer brought Vanessa a drink just calling her beautiful and walking away. She didn't waste anytime sipping on it, offering some off to Grace. "See I'm hot," she teased. Vanessa continued to drink trying to figure out where Grace was exactly looking. "Does who look familiar?" her eye sight was a little fuzzy, she blamed on the tequila shots as she scanned the room. "The only person I know here is you, and you are hot. You literally have two guys, one super attractive and the other rich, pining after you. They're not with you for your expert computer skills, babe."

Grace cringed when Vanessa said Miles wasn't too bad. She definitely didn't see him in that kind of way. A smile brightened her features when Vanessa was brought a drink, gladly taking sips from it, "Damn, must be nice getting free stuff just for your looks." She teased. It felt as though her eyes were beginning to droop even more and she was starting to lose her train of thought, "Uuhhh... Nevermind. Drunk mind is seeing things." She shrugged, laughing it off. Grace felt herself stumble a little as she danced, lightly catching herself against Vanessa, "No. Jonah doesn't want me. He's moving on. Probably as we speak. With Esme. Or Frankie. Or maybe even Clare! They're all in beautiful Aspen together, sexing it up and forgetting aaalll about me." She grumbled, fumbling in her pocket till she got her phone and incoherently texted as she half danced, half swayed about in the crowd.

Vanessa "It's exhausting honestly. Having to be fake nice to people and then having to deal with their drunk asses at the end of the night is not as fun as a free drink. Thankfully, I have you hear to pummel any creep who tries to take me home," Vanessa's voice trailed. As Vanessa continued to spin with the music, she could feel her head becoming hazy but she concluded it down to her excessive spinning. However she felt so free and weightless in this moment she didn't want to fight it anymore. "Uh, ew. There's so many things w-wrong with that. Frankie's like twelve, Esme's too busy shoving her tongue down Tiny's throat and Clare... Well she's too innocent. Too boring if you ask me," she replied, stuttering a bit in the middle. "Do you honestly think they're all there worried about "sexing it up"? If you were away from Toronto, you would not be worried about those who came with you." Vanessa finished the drink, dropping it on one of the nearby tables. Once she returned to Grace, she rolled her eyes snatching the phone out of her hands. "Nope! It's Girl's Night remember? No drunk booty calls."

Grace snorted, "Me? Pummel someone? I mean, for you, I'd try." She smiled lazily. Her eyes kept wandering around, partially cause everything was spinning, but also because she kept looking for that familiar face. She really did recognize someone, though she couldn't figure out how. Trying to focus back on her friend, she shrugged, "Jonah is gorgeous, those girls must be all over him. And are you kidding me?! We're teenagers, of course we're worried about each other and sex and hormones and.... all that stuff!" She pouted, trying to get her phone back, "No booty call, I promise. It was Jonah, he was texting me back!" Grace looked at her friend and stopped fighting for her phone, "I'm pathetic. I see it now." Sighing loudly, she started to lean toward her friend, "I drank too much." She mumbled.

Vanessa giggled, "Yeah we both know I'm the muscles behind this operation." Vanessa scanned the room one more time, seeing parts of it becoming more crowded and other parts becoming more spacious. She reluctantly handed the raven haired girl her phone back, shaking her head. "I'm not worried about that," she shrugged, grabbing onto her friend's hand. She moved through the crowd, finding one of the empty corners to talk to her friend in. Even in her drunken state, Vanessa still managed to go into Mom mode. "Hey, hey you're not pathetic. We can leave if you want? Uber to my place, keep drinking there, and then we'll come get your car in the morning. Sound good?" As she spoke, one of the men from earlier offered to wait outside with them so they weren't stranded in the dark. "Come on, Grace, I'll call it and we can wait outside," she spoke, not even acknowledging the man who came near them.

Grace smiled giddily as Vanessa handed her phone back to her, despite the fact that she could barely read a damn thing on the phone at the moment. She let her friend take her hand, tripping along behind her, "Where are we going??" She glanced around, not even seeing faces anymore. Almost running right into Vanessa because she wasn't paying attention, she came to a stop and looked her friend in the eye, "I'm ruining the night, aren't I? Dammit, I'm sorry! I want you to have fun, and I wanna have fun with you, I swear!" Grace jumped when the random man spoke to them, giving him a look, "Stranger danger, no thanks." Quickly, she focused back on Vanessa, "Okay, yeah. We'll have fun on our own. I promise." Looping her arm with the other girls, they headed towards the exit. A man bumped into her and caused her to stumble, "Excuse you. Jeez." She murmured, shaking her head. The man kept close to them, though, rather than walking away, which made some distant part in Grace's mind worry.

Vanessa "No, no. The night is less than over. I just don't like the ways those creeps keep staring at us," Vanessa pointed out. She tried to keep her mind focus on everything but her vision was going in and out. The voices around her starting to blur. She quickly shook her head, reminding herself to have water when she got home. There was no one outside once the pair got out, causing some nervousness through Vanessa. She pulled her phone out, almost laughing to herself, "Damn what's my phone number?" Before she could have told Siri to put in her address, Vanessa felt a pull at her sides. "I can get you home," the voice called from behind her ear. In her drunken state the words felt comfortable as shellacked along with the body. How much did she drink? "Come on Grace, let's go home,' she grinned nodding her friend to follow along. The man's hand snaked around Vanessa as three more men followed closely behind Grace. "If you scream, we'll kill her right here," the whispered into Grace's ear.

Grace When the two got outside, Grace focused on her phone and her texts between her and Jonah. She didn't realize other people had come outside with them until she heard a voice. Looking up, she could barely make out their faces, and as she shook her head no, the world began to turn. She stumbled, almost falling over, but one of the guys caught her and started ushering her along, "No, V." She mumbled, looking down at her phone to try and continue her text to Jonah, tell him something was wrong, but the man pulling her along grabbed her phone from her. Grace tried to grab for it, finding herself to be too weak from whatever she had drank, and the strangers words didn't help. Not wanting to test his words, she kept her mouth shut as the two were brought to a van and pushed inside, "Vanessa, I-" She was cut off by the feeling a hand at the back of her neck, squeezing. It was definitely a warning and Grace obeyed.

Vanessa's mind didn't think too much of what was going on. She wasn't forced into the van, more guided into it would be a better way to phrase it. She tried to lay down in the van, but felt a pull on her wrist strapping them together. "W-what the?" Vanessa whispered trying to free her wrist. Her head perked up looking up at Grace attempting to say her name. Her eyes wide, but her body unable to fight off what was going on. Before she could say anything back she noticed them grabbing on to Grace and knew better to speak. Vanessa took a deep breath, trying to calm herself down. This wasn't happening. This couldn't be happening.

Grace grit her teeth as rope was tied firmly around her wrists, connecting them and rendering her unable to use her hands. Closing her eyes, she took in a deep breath, really wishing she were sober right now. When she opened her eyes, she saw the look of worry and fear on Vanessa’s face. She nodded once, slowly, trying to convey that everything would be okay. Just a moment after, the two girls were blindfolded, so they didn’t see where they were being taken. Her breathing had become shaky and she was trying her hardest not to pass out from all the drinks she’d had. Grace wasn’t sure how long it’d been before the car finally came to a stop. She felt a hand on her arm, pulling her out of the vehicle and leading her into a building. Her blindfold was pulled off and she swayed with dizziness as her eyes adjusted as best they could, “Welcome to your hell, ladies.” Her eyes landed on the man who had spoken, “What the hell do you want with us?!” The man looked to another in the room and nodded, which prompted the other man to slap her across the face, “You will speak only when I say you can.” Her jaw set, but she stayed quiet.

Vanessa had to remember back to her father trying to prepare her for this. She was to keep her mouth shut, get inventory of the place, and someone would come to get here, if all else fails fight like Hell. Her father's words ringing in her head as the blindfold was pressed roughly onto her eyelids and forcing out of the van. Vanessa was forced down on her knees as the blindfold was pulled away. She looked over to Grace, trying to show she was alright until she saw Grace getting smack. She quickly fixed her face turning to the men surrounding them. There had to be six or seven directly near them and about four adjacent at each exit. "Now you can either give us the location to your warehouse or spend the week with us. I'm sure the boys will find a nice way to get you talking or screaming, which ever comes first," the guy in the front spoke. Vanessa took a deep breath, "Do your worst." She couldn't 't be afraid, not now, especially not that they were trying to get to her father's place. At her words her head was pushed into the floor a ringing noise in her ear and she felt a dripping of blood on her temple.

Grace heard the mans demand, but she knew better than to talk. She definitely hadn't been in the life as long as Vanessa, that much was true, but she had learned more than enough within the past year. Lifting her chin, she said nothing and looked defiantly at the men around her before glancing to Vanessa. She only flinched a little when they hurt her friend, not wanting to show the affect this had on her, "Separate them." Grace's head flew around to look at the lead man once again, clenching her teeth in anger. The last thing she wanted was for them to not be together during this. She was grabbed by the arm and she fought violently to get away, refusing to leave Vanessa alone, but she was thrown to the ground, not able to catch herself with her hands tied. One of the men kicked her in the stomach, causing a rush of air to leave her body, "Now get the fuck up and do as you're told." Struggling to get herself up, the man nearest to her gripped her arm and heaved her to her feet. Looking back at Vanessa, she gave her a serious look, willing her friend to be strong, before she was dragged into the next room.

to be continued....