#which are verse dependent
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muse feelings and indicators
RULES: bold for usually, italics for sometimes
happiness
being unable to stop smiling. laughter. bear hugs. happy tears. waving arms around. dancing. contently sighing. eyes twinkling. laughter lines. childlike playfulness. skipping. talking more. affection. cracking more jokes than usual. gesturing more when talking. higher pitched voice. squealing. jumping around. clapping.
sadness
tearing up. self-hugging. one-arm cross. an aching chest. scratchy throat. a runny nose. turning away. deep breaths. quivery smiles. crying. infantile sobbing. hands gripping each other or an object. covering mouth. puffy eyes. eyes appear red. voice breaking. a distant or empty stare. monotone voice. asking for comfort. faking a smile. crumbling. shaking. whimpering. abusing an unhealthy habit. withdrawing from others. big teary eyes. doing something even if it could hurt them.
anger
furrowed brows. baring teeth. passive-aggressive comments. avoiding eye contact. sarcasm. headache. sore muscles. hiding clenched fists. irritability. jumping to conclusions. raising voice. going silent. demanding immediate action. keeping it all in until exploding. body tensing. making risky decisions. middle finger.
fear
wanting to flee or hide. what-ifs. images of what-could-be flashing in mind. uncontrollable trembling. rapid breathing. screaming. a skewed sense of time. irritability. keeping silent. denying fear. turning away from the cause. pretending to be brave. nail-biting. lip-biting. scratching skin. a joking tone but a voice that cracks. fainting. insomnia. panic attacks. exhaustion. substance abuse. tics. rushing adrenaline. face draining of color. hair lifting on the back of the neck. feeling rooted to the spot. making body as small as possible. staring but not seeing. crying. a shrill voice. whispering. gripping something or someone. stuttering. flinching at noises. pleading.
exhaustion
constantly yawning. slurring words together. dark circles or lines under eyes. mood swings. hallucinations. calling people by the wrong name. dizziness. denying they’re tired. slow blinking. trouble concentrating. stumbling. leaning on a doorframe for support. sluggish movements. falling asleep someplace that isn’t a bed. becoming irritated by the smallest things. “i’m awake, i’m fine”. shaking so bad they spill their drink. fall asleep in their clothes. lay their head on the table because they’re so tired. passing out.
tagged by: stolen from the void! tagging: @dojimakaichou . @saishuu-heiki . @cwarscars . @svnsworn (for one of your FFXVI muses? I'm going to start the game soonish!) . @marie-dufresne & you!
#dash games#headcanon#as always there are slight variations#which are verse dependent#but I try my best haha
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#🐉#personally my moneys on VAL because although jon beat the distortion which bears some similarities#the distortion tricks your mind into believing the world is not what it is while VAL can actually rewrite reality#so the power of omniscience would be of little advantage#however this does assume that jarchivist would let VAL even open her mouth before eldritch blasting her#or that VAL would choose to neutralise jarchivist without playing with him first. giving him more time to counter her.#all in all i think it really depends on who speaks first#but im going with VAL unless jon unravels her mommy issues faster than she can turn him into a chair#tma#the silt verses
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I’m obsessed with them already
#sram#sramhr#SKAM Croatia#dare I say most attractive noorhelm yet#nora klaric selem#roko maric#Nora x Roko#Now I must explain the song choice#first of all thinking bout you is my favourite song EVER#but I always thought that particular verse was no noorhelm coded#they’re technically not each other’s first times because they both have had experience#as far as I know sram will have that remain the same#unless they change it ?#but I always thought the concept of a first time extends beyond physical intimacy#rather - the first time you’re in love#so in that sense I see this as first *true* love#not infatuation#but pure genuine and deep love#a new feel!!#because it’s literally right out of their respective comfort zones#no cause let’s talk about how they have a mutual fear of love and vulnerability#for different though similar reasons (lack of familial love)#which results in them being quite reserved / introverted people#but their independence/self preservational personalities become a sort of security blanket#because they’re so used to moving through life depending on themselves#until they learn to open their hearts and let love in#and it’s diffcult and messy at times#but it’s worth it#god they really are so poetic when you sit and ponder on it
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Thinking abt Kae’s Fatui verse,,,,
#☆ ┆ ( .ooc. );#//Him having a sort of fatal attraction vibe goin with Traveler like Came||ya’s whole thing almost hdbfb#//The whole ‘you’re interesting; I really like you; I can’t WAIT to see what makes you tick’#//Except he might actually be more of a danger to them; considering his endgame for those he ‘loves’#v; l’innamorato (fatui!kaeya)#//The love idea of him v attached to Signora; deffo got along with the kiddos of the HotH better fjhdh#//Prolly loved presenting her W|ll Sm|th style; even if the attention it drew to him too did make his skin crawl more often than not#//Love the idea of him stalking Traveler thru their journeyw lil heart eyes; interfering at key moments to hinder or help them progress#//Depends on how he’s feeling at the moment jcbcb#//In this verse would deffo butt heads with Taru in Fontaine specifically—he wants Traveler’s attention too jfbfb#//Prolly met them in Mond as part of Signora’s lil entourage—IMMEDIATELY got intrigued at first glance#//Background wise; I like to think he was a Fatuus meant to infiltrate the knights like many of Eroch’s ppl#//And in the progress of going through the knight thing got acquainted w Luc & began to have doubts abt the Fatui cause#//After visiting his home; hearing abt and meeting his father; then the day of the Heckening happens & they fight#//Bc Kae already planned to come clean & renounce the Fatui & Khaenri’ah; but the mess Crepus’s death made of him#//Tried far too hastily; far too bluntly to tell Luc the truth of his origins; swearing he knew nothing abt the Delusion#//Only to get claymore’d; which absolutely helped cemented him into the Fatui’s ranks more#//A part of him knows it wasn’t the time to say it; that he is at fault for trying to take advantage of Luc’s vulnerable state to tell him#//Only for the lad to have been far too volatile & so it turned out badly; but he still blames Luc for the break of their bond#//Anywho; I like to think as of Inazuma; he does have a certain grudge against traveler bc of Signora#//Before; encounters were more of puppy love bordering on dangerous obsession—after that; the dangerous bit became Personal#//Ohhh I’m writing a yandere here; okay<-should have realized that from the FIRST slew of Fatuiverse hcs lmao#//He genuinely does love Traveler; would like to see them breaking down in despair in his arms#//The two of them together would make a most beautiful ice sculpture indeed#//Even with his grudge; Traveler does stand a chance at swaying him to actually be helpful#//Sumeru quest wise; Co||ei is the magic word—i like to think he came along with there bc he wanted to see abt the Eleazar#//And maybe find clues to her family or even her herself; Traveler or Paimon dropping the name would make him cooperate SO fast#//Klee in Mond is basically his Teucer jffb. She is as good as fam in his eyes—I like to think he keeps up his habit of collecting pyro ppl#//Bc he never got over his broken bond with SOMEONE. Even if this verse has him more bitter abt it#//But ye jdbdbd. Is it rlly a Allie posting if it not short lol blurb and then heckin TAG SPAM lololol
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Marcelline 🤝 Marcille: needing to keep an eye on your autistic sometimes-unnerving and dangerously competent brother because he keeps trying to do some freaky shit to monsters while also attempting to juggle being a full-time lesbian
#I JUST REALIZED THIS SHFHCH#oc posting#both of them have short tempers too though thats where the similarities end#marcelline is much more like a terrier. marcille reminds me of ollie#as for aeris...well. depends on which verse he's in but#'eating' the monsters sure is a thing he does#tho they have very different meanings if hes in bloodborne vs d2
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help me choose between krakoa cherik, movies cherik (can be them old or young) or x-men '97 cherik for my fics cause this is a place i don't know which one to choose
wellllll the verse i pick is usually dependent on the idea i have since Personally i think some verses offer something specific compared to others For Certain Ideas but i generally have a bias for tas/classic cherik for my stuff
#snap chats#like sometimes certain settings give me more. things to play with ? compared to a different verse? if that makes sense ?#like each verse has their own thing that they can bring to the table so its very dependent i think#like i couldnt do Supervillain Roleplay for movieverse or krakoa but i also wouldnt do road trip stuff for comic/krakoa verse#just which one is your favorite if you cant decide i guess !
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𝒑𝒆𝒓𝒄𝒚
#sims#ts3#sims 3#photoshoots#character verse#percy fontaine#percy fountain#(the last tag is for berry version - I just used a slightly different spelling for the character verse/vanilla percy's surname)#I was redoing the berry rainbowcy characters into vanilla ones to add them to my tree#I neglected percy a bit but I decided to take a slightly different direction with her (details still wip) and she turned out great#like she's more independent and rebellious I guess#she's still freya's mother but I'm going back and forth on her and lavi's relationship#amicable exes or lavi in a poly relationship with both her and a character verse version of blizzard? stay tuned#I guess it depends on the story direction which I'm currently trying to figure out#the latter is currently called beatrice btw but somehow I'm never 100% sold on her vanilla name I've gone through like 3 b names
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𝐌𝐔𝐒𝐄'𝐒 𝐋𝐈𝐅𝐄 𝐄𝐗𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄𝐒
Bold what always applies. Italicise what could apply / applies only to some verses.
Killed Someone Under Orders | Had Someone Killed On Their Orders | Killed Someone In Self Defense | Spared Someone’s Life | Invented Something | Been Hungover | Kissed Someone | Slow-Danced | Been In A Long-Term Relationship | Had Sex | Had Sex And Regretted It | Had A One-Night Stand | Had A Threesome/Orgy | Experimented With Their Sexuality | Had A Kid | Adopted A Kid | Wanted To Have A Family With Someone | Done Something On Impulse They Regretted | Gone Traveling | Had A Bounty Put On Them | Eaten An Insect | Been Groped By A Stranger | Been Groped By Someone They Know | Been Dumped | Dumped Someone | Smoked | Gotten High | Flirted With Someone To Get Free Drinks | Put Someone In A Headlock | Won A Bet | Lost A Bet | Forgiven Someone Who Wronged Them | Indulged In Petty Revenge | Hallucinated | Has A Noticeable Physical Defect | Gotten A Noticeable Scar | Been Permanently Disfigured Through Injury | Kneed Someone In The Groin | Had An Unattainable Crush | Laughed Themselves To The Point Of Tears | Been Kidnapped |
Been Brainwashed/Hypnotised | Had A Recurring Nightmare | Been Bullied | Bullied Someone | Experienced Survivor’s Guilt | Been Tied/Chained Up | Given Someone A Massage | Received A Massage | Been Backed Up Against A Wall | Shot Someone | Stabbed Someone | Saved Someone’s Life | Cheated On Someone | Been Cheated On | Been In An Open Relationship | Had A Friendship With Benefits | Been In A Queerplatonic Relationship | Had A Stalker | Been Betrayed | Been A Traitor | Been Possessed | Been In A Bar Fight | Been Thrown Out Of A Bar | Been Arrested | Broken Out Of Jail | Been To A Funeral | Been To A Brothel | Had Surgery | Broken Someone’s Trust | Broken Someone’s Heart | Had Their Heart Broken | Broken/Damaged Something Out Of Anger | Broken/Damaged Something Out Of Spite | Gotten A Piercing | Gotten A Tattoo | Used A Fake Name | Been Beaten Up | Been Tortured | Tortured Others | Been Abused | Been Blackmailed | Gotten Away With A Crime | Framed Someone Else For A Crime They Committed | Shared A Bed Platonically | Been In Love | Suffered From Sleep Paralysis | Been Forced To Flee Their Home | Learned A New Language | Joined A Rebellion | Fought On The Losing Side Of A War | Fought On The Winning Side Of A War | Become A Godparent | Become An Aunt/Uncle
Tagged by: @hazbinned
Tagging: Anyone who wants it, please steal and tag me! :>
#grow back your sharpest teeth. ( headcanons. )#OK SO the ones related to love/intimacy/sex are all verse dependent and only apply to verses where a ship has been developed to those point#by default my alastor has never been with anyone romantically or sexually unless and until he chooses to be during ship development#and then the 'war' in question is meant as the exterminations#and then the 'surgery' in question is just him having gone through stitching wounds pretty often#some of these things happened while he was alive and have not happened again in hell (ex. been groped by a stranger)#he hallucinates from lack of sleep at times which is what that one is in reference to#im not gonna keep elaborating on all these things lol sorry i am just a YAPPER
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Since you are also a fan of LU Four, I need to ask if you have a favorite headcanon.
ASDFGH HOW CAN YOU ASK ME TO PICK JUST ONE I HAVE SO MANY FOUR HEADCANONS AND I LOVE THEM ALL
SELECTED RANDOMLY:
Though Four enjoys all aspects of smithing, each of the Colours has an area that they most enjoy and do best at!
Blue - fiddly and repetitive tasks like making arrowheads and links of mail and reattaching broken pieces
Vio - complex fine detail tasks like making buckles or decorative details for commission pieces; he’s also the one who does jewellery but he complains about it
Red - the early steps in heavy shaping for armour and weaponry, hammering things into shape
Green - the finishing steps like sharpening, polishing, attaching hilts and checking balances
THANK YOU FOR ASKING - !
#linked universe#lu four#you have no idea how much excited flailing this ask inspired#i have SO MANY four headcanons#there are many different potential versions of four and which one works best depends on the verse or situation#so some of them are mutually exclusive#like ‘four is a system’ and ‘four is his own person and the colours are just voices in his ear’ and ‘four is his own individual person’#and some can coexist#like ‘four’s favourite food is bread’ and ‘four once filled warriors’ bag with oranges for making a disparaging comment abt mental illness’#<3<3<3#i love four. so much#the POTENTIAL#hi gryphon!!!#asks and answers#skies thinks too much#whoops rambling in the tags again
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translation of the first verse from gliese 710 by king gizzard! almost every verb here is in the imperative mood, which posed a bit of a challenge. in irkan osla, unlike in english, the imperative declines based on number - either first person plural, or second person singular or plural. i went for 1PL because I thought it sounded almost like a sort of battlecry and less like a literal command, but the others would work too depending on your interpretation of the lyrics. i also decided to translate 'lava' as 'fire-river', since i don't think this culture would be familiar with active volcanoes.
melt the ice reheat the dead terraform the planet compress the lungs eat the mushroom cool the lava watch the new star dance upon the night sky
blüas ṭhuṣki kxokomaŋka doanragiki na'isünaas ërki fahaaŋka ṇiiṇliphiki khenaak ömki kaṣkhalauas thufki ṭṣi glutas ixki xorosabaothi ḍi misit
gloss and IPA under the cut!
ice-II.SG.ABS melt-IMP.1PL dead.ones-I.PL.ABS again-heat-IMP.1PL world-II.SG.ABS transform-IMP.1PL lung-I.PL.ABS compress-IMP.1PL mushroom-I.SG.ABS eat-IMP.1PL fire.river-II.SG.ABS cool-IMP.1PL new star-II.SG.ABS watch-IMP.1PL night.sky-II.SG.DAT in dance-INF
/ˈbly.as ˈʈʰuʂ.ki ˈkxɔ.kɔ.maŋ.ka ˈdɔan.ra.gi.ki ˈna.ʔi.sy.na.as ˈər.ki ˈfa.ha.aŋ.ka ˈɳiːɳ.li.pʰi.ki ˈkʰɛ.na.ak ˈœm.ki ˈkaʂ.kʰa.lau.as ˈtʰuf.ki ʈʂi ˈglu.tas ˈix.ki ˈxɔ.rɔ.sa.ɔ.tʰi ɖi ˈmi.sit/
#i hope the imperative mood conjugation explanation makes sense idk if theres a better way of putting it tbh#looking back i maybe shouldve gone with a 2nd person imperative but i mean#it depends on how u look at it and im really bad at interpreting poetry#might also translate the other '(verb) the (noun)' type verses this was pretty fun#fun fact: this clong has six different words for love and the one for obsessive or manic love is 'khigi'#like 'ki'ng 'gi'zzard lol. from this the word 'khigul' is derived which can mean obsession but also special interest :3#conlang#my conlangs#neography#irkan osla#translation
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Does she have a name besides wifey?
//Her husbands named her;
Marie, Honey, Kathleen and Estella
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PLOTTED STARTER ! ⤷ @magemade ✧ callum.
The last few nights had been nights full of nothing but restlessness for Rayla. Ever since coming back from Umber Tor, visiting the Storm Spire again... All she could see when she closed her eyes were the horrible images that plagued her. And to make matters worse, new ones had surfaced. Ones she didn't want to see, to experience... or to even think about.
She knew why. It had been that... ridiculous request Callum had made of her. Well, ridiculous was putting it mildly; she'd called it that because she couldn't bring herself to admit the truth about it: that what he'd asked her to do was the one thing she couldn't do. Not him, not in a million years.
Rayla knew she'd give up her own life before she could ever fulfill that request.
Unfortunately... those sleepless nights had started to catch up to her. She knew if she didn't get at least a bit of sleep, she was going to regret it, and people were going to start asking questions... and knowing Callum, he'd be at the front of that line. Distant as they'd been, and as much as he'd kept her at arm's length, she knew he'd be the first to catch on. So, she did the only thing she knew she could: find a place of comfort, with lots of moonlight, and hope that she at least got enough sleep to function tomorrow.
She knew exactly the place. Callum wasn't in his office, thankfully; she didn't want to know what he'd think if he saw her sleeping in such a strange place. With one deep breath to steel herself, Rayla pulled herself up into the window, satisfied that she was out of sight enough that even if someone walked in, she wouldn't be immediately seen. Her sitting on a window sill wasn't out of the ordinary, but sleeping on one? The less questions she had to answer about that one, the better.
Settling herself as comfortably as she could, she tossed her cloak over herself like a blanket, settling down. Was it comfortable? Absolutely not. Was it the worst place she'd slept? Definitely not. At least up in the window, she didn't have to worry about ambushes or wild animals; the guards patrolling the castle prevented that, along with Pyrrah doing the occasional flight around from the skies.
She must have been more tired than she anticipated, as within moments, she was sound asleep; the moon was soothing enough that she was sleeping heavily, overcome with the exhaustion that days of little to no sleep had caused in her.
After a few hours, she roused awake, still feeling some of the exhaustion that plagued her; though she'd slept, most of it wasn't a restful sleep. It was then that she realized she was no longer in the window; she was laying on something soft, with a blanket tucked over her. Who would've..?
"Callum?" She croaked, sitting up as she tried to rub the sleep from her eyes. How long had she slept? There was light, but... no, it wasn't sunlight. She could see the faint glow along the horizon, but the majority of the light was still from the moon, so it had to be at least an hour before sunrise.
#rayla ✦ in character ∭ ❝ protecting that dragon doesn't just feel like the right thing to do; it feels like the right thing for me to do. ❞#verse ✧ the dragon prince.#magemade ✧ callum.#magemade#don't mind the length sometimes i ramble LOL#*shoves them together like barbie dolls* KISS AND MAKE UP YOU DORKS#time to make a list of clever but stupid ways rayla is gonna try (and fail) to change the subject#it's funny bc it would probably work on anyone else#unfortunately callum sees through her tricks LOL#but yeah after umber tor but before scumport#which ugh depending on how they resolve things.... now imagine the horror of scumport
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Is there a favorite outfit Gabriel has?
@aroyaltailor has curiosities!
【★】 — "Not particularly? A favored style of clothing is generally anything I can move around easily in~. Whispers in the wind make me rather acutely aware of certain things so ease of movement is a priority for me while aesthetics are secondary." There's a rather casual smile on his face. "Though I suppose when I'm not on the field, I tend to keep it simple ❤"
#¤ message received ¤#aroyaltailor#//Just to put it out there - Gabs' normal height is 7'4 and he has a fit build which depending on his clothing choice of the day might#either be accentuated or hidden. One of these days I'll get a ref of his main verse appearance and post eet teehee#//sidenote: no tie the shirt would be white and a few of the buttons would be undone bc he has pecks that cannot be contained
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OOC:
#the caretaker peeks in (ooc)#(I have family here atm but I just had a fairly rotten revelation)#(so I have two slightly varying paths for the bio depending on whether L.ion G.uard happens or not)#(so I have Tacari have a cubhood friend who might be S.arafina's brother; right? Is one of the Guard members)#(the other lions can be easily explained as not returning to the P.ride Lands)#(but this one needs to disappear before the events of the movie. Which is where brain gave a rotten idea.)#(what if the cub landed in danger; and in one setting Tacari could save him by unlocking the Roar)#(but in the verse where there is no Guard stuff... he dies.)#(anyway I gotta go to family byee)
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Shadow Checkmate (Drabble)
For @shachou
Chess. It was the first game Nii-sama ever taught me, the one that made me really love gaming. I'm not very good at it. Nowhere near as good as my brother. But...when I play it with him, it makes me so happy! It's a lot of fun to try and beat him, even if I always lose.
It used to be something we'd do every day, with other kids at the orphanage watching us. But...we don't play chess anymore. We haven't since we moved into this house.
Our stepfather says Nii-sama has more important things to do than to play with me, something about needing to work hard. That's why I don't see him most days. I only see him at dinner once in a while or at a fancy party I get to go to. Other times, I'm told he's too busy studying with his teachers, even if I ask nicely.
I miss him. I miss him a lot. I miss the days when he read me stories about dragons and wizards. I miss the days when he'd tuck me into bed. I miss the days when we played chess for fun all day. I miss the days we were together.
With him not around, I've gotten lonely and bored. That means I've had to make new ways to have fun, like Nii-sama and I always used to do. That's why I made a new game, a new game I can play that makes me feel like I'm playing it with him.
It's called Shadow Checkmate.
The rules are the same as regular chess, except you don't need a second person to play. All you need is yourself and your shadow. Though, I don't have any chess pieces. I've had to use things in my room, like buttons or pencils, instead. I drew the board out on a piece of paper, one side for the 'white' pieces and one side for the 'black'. I use the black ones like I always do, and my shadow uses the white.
I take my turns, and then I move my shadow's pieces for it. Though, when I play, I don't see or hear my shadow playing with me. I hear and see my brother. For he is always by my side, like a shadow, even if he isn't here.
"Good move, Mokie!" I'd hear him say, my brother's voice echoing in my head.
"Better luck next time, kiddo." He'd tell me after he'd win, like he always does.
"Let's play again!" That is what he'd say after each game, always wanting to play more.
I'd play Shadow Checkmate for hours and hours. I'd play so much to the point I'd fall asleep right there on the floor. It was fun and made me feel like, even just for a while, that I wasn't trapped in this stupid house. When I was back home with Nii-sama, smiling and playing together like we always did.
-------------------
I find myself coming back to that little game I made rather recently, playing it wherever Nii-sama happens to be. In his hospital room. In his bedroom. Even outside in the mansion's garden when the doctors allow me to take him out. Wherever he is, and we'd have a moment, we'd play, just like we used to.
I'd set up the pieces, proper chess pieces his time. His were white, and mine were black. And since I long since memorized all of his moves, I gently guide his hands to the pieces, helping him move them into place. Of course, I always lose. But...unlike the last time I lost a game, I don't get yelled at or punished for losing, even if I somehow always get a little shaken when his voice in my mind echos "checkmate."
It was nice to have him here, not looking at me so coldly, at least physically. For he can't move or can't talk right now. Like this, he really had become my shadow, always there next to me, but unable to react to anything I say, outside of what I make up in my head. The real him was off rebuilding the puzzle of his heart, according to Yugi, whatever that meant.
But I promised to wait for him, and wait for him I did. Each and every day for over half a year. I played many games with him, maybe in hopes that by doing so he'd come back, but nothing had changed. And unlike when I was little, I wasn't smiling as much during these games. It didn't help ease my loneliness. If anything, it made me feel sadder. For my Nii-sama was right in front of me, and yet...it still wasn't who I was waiting for. It wasn't who I wanted to be with more than anything. It wasn't who I wanted to say "I love you, Mokuba" for real instead of in my head.
It wasn't my big brother, the person I wanted to play chess for real with.
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I played a lot of chess with my friends while I've been at Tasuku's place. All four of them took turns playing with me, me winning against Gao and Akatsuki and me losing to Suzuha and Tasuku. I tried my best to put my all into these games, but...my heart just wasn't in. It was like I was zoning out most of the time, stuck in my own head and unable to focus on what was in front of me.
Whoever I played against, I would always see Nii-sama instead. Instead of their voices, I'd hear his, encouraging me or congratulating me on a win. It was no different than playing Shadow Checkmate all over again, except this time I didn't have to move the other pieces.
The more we played as the weeks went on, the more I kept thinking. Will I get to play chess with the real Nii-sama ever again? Will I get to ever see him again? Will he ever want to see me again? Will he...will he send me back to the orphanage, since I liked it there so much? Will I be forced to play with shadows of him made by my mind, something i did when I had no choice, forever?
My fears engulfed my shadows, transforming the images of my brother I saw during these games now, just like how he appeared in my nightmares. His voice changed too, encouraging words now distorted into the anger-filled rage he experienced that night that had been echoing in my mind since they happened as if they'd never shut up.
"I will not entertain this nonsense any longer!"
"You want no part of this ? Fine. Do as you wish."
" This conversation is over."
I put my hands over my ears as they get louder, dropping my chess pieces in the process as my eyes shut tight and tears start to flow. Tasuku and my friends come to my side to comfort me, but I can't hear them. All I can hear and see is my shadow growing into my brother, towering over me like his dragon, before detaching himself from me and leaving me alone.
All alone.
Forever.
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Here I am. Sitting alone inside a room in this mansion, this time my brother's room, playing Shadow Checkmate once again with the makeshift pieces I made when I was five. I know I don't have to play this anymore. I had friends I could play with. I had employees I could play with. Hell, if I wanted to, I could make an AI version of my brother to play with.
But...for some reason, I chose this way instead. Maybe it was because it felt nostalgic. Maybe it was because it had worked in the past into fooling myself he was actually here. For unlike all the other times before, my brother isn't here in this dimension. He's off somewhere I can't get to. Somewhere, I don't know if he'll ever return from.
As I move my pieces into place, following suit by moving my shadows, I try to not think so hard. I want to lose myself in my fantasies. I want to escape for even just a moment, to remind myself that everything is okay and that my brother is still with me!
And yet...this time, there was nothing. No voice. No sound. No image. It was just me. Me, myself, and I. The reality of it all was too real to suppress, for no trace of my brother was left in this world other than his cards, his possessions, and my memories and mementos. I wasn't a little kid anymore who could distract myself with self-made images of what I wanted to see.
I had grown up, meaning this game...was no longer what I needed it to be anymore.
I threw all of the game pieces to the side in a swipe, gritting my teeth in frustration as I huffed and puffed. I hate this! Why wasn't it working anymore? Can't I just have a moment, even just a second of peace? The peace I thought would always be there?!
We promised each other we wouldn't ever be separated. We promised we'd always stick together. We promised we'd always be a team. And yet, just like in my visions from the past, he's left my side, my shadow seemingly nonexistent as I turn my back to look.
For there was no light to guide me. No light to warm me. No light to guide me. Nii-sama is my light. He always has been, and without him...I feel...
I feel incomplete, like part of my soul is missing; a part I need to live lest I be cast down back into the sea of despair that had almost drowned me so many times again and again. I feel worthless, knowing I can never fill his shoes. I feel numb, knowing I might never get to play another game with him....ever again.
It was suffocating as I cried my eyes out over him, left in nothing but the rubble of my childhood escape that could no longer stop me from drowning...
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It was a miracle. A miracle I thought one day might never come. But it did. The light that protects my brother's soul, his dragons, along with a priest who resembled him, led me back to my brother. We were together at last, his light returning my shadow to me after a painful two months of separation.
Naturally, everyone celebrated his return. Kaiba Corporation was glad to have him back, a weight being taken off my shoulders. Despite doing my best, no one ran the company quite like my brother. He had a light that lead everyone to doing their jobs well and to the best of their ability, a light I sadly don't have just yet but that I hope I one day will have!
However, that wasn't what I was concerned about. I was worried about one thing and one thing only: spending time with him, good quality time outside of work. I wasn't about to let him become a workaholic again. At least...not right away. For there was something important I just had to do, a thought that had been on my mind since he first left.
I come into his lab with a box under my arms, one I had to dig around in Seto's room for. My entrance gets his attention, him turning his chair to face me. I greet him with a smile, as I always do, before I do what I have been wanting to do for so long; finally putting a nail in the coffin to my old game
"Niisama...?" I ask, holding up a box containing his personal set of a certain game, a game we haven't played together in ages that I was ready to play with him for real this time.
"Can we...play some chess? I think...I think I'm finally ready to beat you!"
#💎 Crystalized Hidden Gems (Drabble)#💎 Vice Treasure (Mokuba Kaiba)#💎 Protective President With Eyes Of Blue (Shachou)#💎 Vice's Dark Side Story (Mokuba DSOD Verse)#💎 Vice's Monochromic Alternate Path (Mokuba Manga Verse)#tw long post#tw ptsd#(decided to try something different here and try for a first person POV which IK is not the typical rp style#(but i found it fitting for this drabble in particular since this is focused on mokuba's experiences internal and external primarily#(IDK HOW WELL IT CAME ACROSS BUT I HAD FUN EXPERIMENTING#(And I tried my best to try and match the narration to Mokuba's age during each of these segments.#(since it goes from like 5/6 to 11 to 12 and then to 13 almost 14#(but yeah this drabble was to show off mokubas headspace during a lot of those isolation times and his main way of coping#(and how over time i didnt work for him anymore#(and even blended into his PTSD symptoms#(but also just how CO-DEPENDENT HE IS ON SETO#(and to sorta describe this imagery mokuba visulizes with seto being his 'shadow' since seto always lingers over him#(and since he considers seto his other half meaning his shadow is tech seto's xD#(anyway hope you enjoyed this ani and hope what i was going for came across
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all day i have been thinking about how much i want to lift out the summers family stuff from my barbieverse bc we all know that's where my heart & soul is/was but it's all sooo inextricably tied to barbie stuff specifically it's hard to thi k of how i would do it. but i looooove the idea of mermaid and fairy half sisters so that might be the part i run with bc tbh i never got to do very much with it bc elina is a weenie who doesn't spend much time on earth and merliah isn't touching fairytopia with a 10 ft pole. but i love them both and obviously i love rip so yeah. this might be where it starts we might get somewhere now ppl
#mel irl#barbie babbles#summers clan blogging#ever since i had the thought of lifting ocs/plots out of stuff i immediately wanted to do everything to do with rip. OBVIOUSLY.#but his life is SO barbie-dependent bc i ended up using him to link a bunch of stuff ahdjakshdkd#but yeah i think what i really LOVE is the mermaid and fairy sisters and one growing up human and one growing up not#(tbh one of them doesnt even have to be a mermaid for this to work. which is good bc i hate mermaids but we'll see.)#and i can do that quite easily in my verse#as for rip's entire journey... that is another story. bc again i made a lot of things happen to him for the hell of it.#obvs finn and anne can be cut and him being alice's dad as well never added much#but i also loved him reuniting with calissa and actually having a family like he always wanted. and the mermaid dynasty.#so i guess we'll fucking see about these mermaids. WE'LL SEE.
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