#wherewebelong | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

heygerds · 3 years ago

Text

Where we belong (short story) by heygerds

I placed my hand on my thighs as I bend and gasp for air. I turned to see if anyone was following me.

It was another chaotic day in the house. I am now sure that their separation can’t be helped. I had always noticed the little things. They don’t love each other anymore. How Mama would get up if Papa would seat on the sofa. How she'll always leave earlier than the usual every morning. Then at night, they would go upstairs together, and I would go down from my room to satisfy my midnight cravings only to find my father sleeping in the couch. It went from those cold wars to being at each other’s throats.

It was painful to see them like they couldn’t stomach each other’s presence.

It’s sad. I know for a fact that we will never go back to what we used to be as a family, yet I also think that it’s for the best because I’d rather have that than hear them shout at each other every day.

I sat at the swing. I am the only one here in the park. It had become my habit to run here whenever I hear them fight. At first, I thought that it was enough to shut my door, take my earphones and put the volume on max so I wouldn’t hear anything, but I would still hear them fight like kids and when I’m alone, all I could think was that. I realized that I needed to feel something every time that happens, that’s why I always find myself running towards this place.

I was staring at nothing and thinking about how the adrenaline from running somehow made me feel better when I heard a voice.

‘’Hi, Aye!’’ I turned into my right and saw a little boy, he was so little that he was struggling to sit on the swing. He looked like a dumpling. He was supposed to call me Ate but I think he’s 5 years old. Understandable.

I stood up and help him get on the swing. He’s heavy. Then someone shouted.

‘’Wontone! I’ve been looking for you!’’ he was walking towards us, holding ice cream in a cone with both of his hands. He’s tall. I probably look like a dwarf looking up to him.

He gave me an apologetic look. ‘’Sorry about him’’

‘’No, it’s okay. No harm done’’ I gave him a small smile. ‘’Next time, keep your eyes on your son. It’s dangerous out here’’

‘’My son?’’ he looked shocked. His mouth was agape.

After a minute, he finally recovered and told me that the kid was not his. Wontone is his brother. I said sorry and explained that they looked alike hence my assumption. I went back to sit on the swing and after he handed the ice cream to his brother, he sat beside me. Silence enveloped us.

‘’Here’’

‘’No, I’m fine’’ I want ice cream, but I think it’s not right that I would accept his. And besides, I barely know him.

‘’I insist. Ice cream always made wontone feel better’’ So he wanted to make me feel better?

I accepted the ice cream he handed and asked him why he is giving me his ice cream. But the only thing I got is a shrug. I also shrugged and went on eating what he gave me.

Wontone and I peacefully eat while he was staring at the sky. We were like that until it was almost time for dinner.

They bid their goodbye saying their mom must be looking for them. I said goodbye too and thank them for the ice cream. I never thought that silence can comfort me like that. They never said anything that will console me, but I felt peace.

Staring at the sky, eating ice cream silently with a little dumpling boy and his brother, whom I had mistaken as his father. But I forgot to ask his name.

I was fixing my collar when Nanay called me.

‘’Are you ready, my dear Solas?’’ she asked. Smiling widely at me. I know that she’s happy. For years, she was alone. But now I am here. She won’t be sad anymore. I’ll make sure of that.

It was hard. When I moved here in Nanay’s house, it felt new even if I always go here for vacation. Maybe because I will live here permanently. No more Mama and Papa bickering. It was new yet for the first time in months, I felt peace.

When I was done preparing, I bid my goodbye to nanay. She even insisted on coming with me because according to her, it was my first day at school. But I refused and said I can handle. I was a little bit nervous, I don’t know anyone. I remembered my friends in manila, they were as sad as I was, but it’s not like we can do anything.

I was at the school gate when I remembered that one time when I was in elementary. My parents took me to my first day in school. Mama was running late yet she insisted. Papa reminded me to behave. They both kissed my cheek at the same time and promised me that we will eat at Jollibee for dinner.

It was one of our happiest memories. It made me smile.

‘’then let's get divorce! if that's what you want! I’m so tired of you!’’ mama shouted at papa. I know I should be running by now, but for some reason, I wanted to stay. I wanted to listen.

‘’right. Let’s end our suffering here’’ papa said. Is this the end?

I can feel it, yet I don’t want to entertain that idea. If I get married, will it also lead to this? Will it come to the point where I will see my husband as someone who is the cause of my sufferings than the person whom I swore before God that we will love each other for the rest of our life? Marriage scares me.

I always knew the reason.

Mama had an affair. And Papa… he loves another woman.

It’s complicated and it makes my headache that’s why I don’t want to understand. I always deny those poisonous thoughts that creep through me at night. But I was just delaying the inevitable.

I also heard a rumor once, that they were not sure if I was papa’s child. It made me doubt as a child back then. But there's no denying that I am his. We look so alike.

My smile fell when that memory flashes through my mind.

I shook my head. That is not the time for this. First day as a senior high school and what are you thinking about, Solas? Tss.

Okay. That’s how I can describe my first days here. It has been a few days since I transferred, and I already made some friends. They were nice. Especially Fariah.

I opened the door of the faculty room. I was assigned to collect the assignments in our statistics subject. I walked ‘till the end, where Mr. Caperal’s table was. I’ll just pass this then I’ll be going home to eat the caldereta Nanay cooked for dinner.

‘’This is a warning Mr. Lorenzo, if you failed another quiz then maybe I would find a student to be you tutor. Understand?’’ I stopped in my tracks when I heard my teacher’s disappointed voice.

Two students are standing in front of him. The taller and tanned one was looking down while the other was playing with his Bench towel and looking around. He looks a bit familiar.

I said my excuse and did what I came here for. While doing so, I felt that someone is staring at me and when I looked up, I caught his black eyes staring at me intently. We were just staring at each other for seconds.

There’s something in his stare that I can’t seem to take my eyes off him.

His friend nudged him, and he quickly averted his gaze. I also withdrew my stare at him and bid my farewell.

On my way home, gone was the caldereta in my mind. The depth and twinkle in his eyes, and how his tanned skin complemented on his well-defined jaw that made him look even manlier are the only things on my mind.

I took out the Tupperware that contains the palabok that Nanay cooked for me. I sat at the stone chair under the big narra tree while waiting for my classmates. They told me to wait while they buy their lunch at the canteen.

The sun's ray is intense that's why beads of sweat started to form on my temple. I was looking for my handkerchief when I saw a hand reaching out to me. I looked up to see who it was.

‘’Here’’. He insisted. ‘’it’s so hot, right?’’ he said as he waved his hand over his handsome face to have some air.

I accepted his handkerchief, which was folded like a triangle. Never taking my eyes off him, I composed myself and said my gratitude.

He winked at me. ‘’See you around, miss.’’

I find it strange that I always think about him while holding his handkerchief. Am I attracted to him? I shook my head. I put my belongings to my bag and headed to the faculty room. I feel sleepy.

I straightened my back when I saw Mr. handkerchief again. This time, he is alone. Did he fail another quiz?

I cleared my throat before speaking then I handed the papers to Mr. Caperal. He said thank you and I was about to turn around when he called me again.

‘’I am wondering if you can be the tutor of Mr. Lorenzo? Your performance in my class is good, and besides, you will have a plus grade if you agree’’ They were both looking at me and waiting for my answer.

And I just found myself nodding.

I don't know what's gotten into me that I said yes instantly. But maybe it was meant to happen. Because I can clearly remember it all.

How he asked my name the first time I taught him statistics. ‘’Nice to meet you, solas’’ I was in awe, looking at his mischievous smile. It still rings clearly in my ears how his tongue rolled when he said my name for the very first time. I remember how I shyly asked him his name. Dyson Lorenzo. What a beautiful name. He told me to just call him Dello.

How our friendship began. Every day, I would wait for him in the library for our lessons then we would go home together. It was so awkward at first but thanks to his eloquence. I’ve learned so many things about him. Apparently, his familiar-looking companion the first time I saw him, named Patrick, was my neighbor. And on weekends, before going to their basketball game, Dello would swing by in our house just to say hi while waiting for Patrick. Nanay likes him. She was amazed by his amazing personality.

I stopped being his tutor when his performance in stats got better. There aren’t many changes, and if any, we only got closer by the time. I grew fond of him. I became addicted to his presence. How he would bother his self just to make me smile when I am having a bad day. How he would always give me food. ”Here. I just thought that you might be hungry, so I bought that’’ he said as he handed me the biscuits. He was my best friend.

We were like the missing puzzle piece of each other. We would understand each other with just one glance without speaking a single word.

Just months before the school year ends, he asked me a question I didn’t expect. I was just staring at him when he asked me to be his girlfriend. I remember he even asked me if I wanted him to court me first because I just stared at his face for a few seconds. Or minutes. I don’t know. I lost track of time. And just like when our statistics teacher asked me if I could be his tutor, I nodded. Finally admitting to him... and to myself what I really felt.

I was happy when Nanay took me in. None of my parents wanted me. I lost all connection to Mama. Nanay holds my allowance that comes from papa. Sometimes, Papa would call me, asking how I am doing. I would always tell him that I miss us. That I miss the way we were before. I miss the family where I belong. I knew back then that what my heart desires was near impossible. My only wish was for my family to be complete at my graduation. It doesn’t matter to me anymore even if they don't love each other anymore if they’d at least, be civil with each other. For me. We will eat together, just like before.

It was very vivid in my memory when Papa called me early at the day of my graduation. He said he couldn’t contact Mama and it would be just the two of us for dinner. I was sad that she can’t come but I forced myself to smile. Papa would take me to dinner. That should be enough for now.

‘’Would you like to celebrate with us? You can also invite Nanay’’ Dello asked. Even his family invited me to their party, but I explained to my boyfriend that I would dine with my father. I know that when they throw parties, it is surely the happiest, but I needed this dinner to happen. And dello knows the story of my parents.

Papa said that we’ll just meet and so I went to the restaurant where he placed a reservation. A waiter ushered me to the table when I said the Papa’s name. I looked around and saw people who were dressed elegantly. I straightened the crease on the skirt of my dress. I was consciously roaming my eyes around because just by the looks of the place, you will know that only people born with a golden spoon on their mouths could afford to eat here. My eyes feasted on the fancy things I can only dream of having.

I waited...Until people around me began to leave. I tried calling my father but to no avail. Until a waiter comes up to me and said they were going to close. I smiled bitterly as my heart shattered in pieces.

After that, I didn’t expect anymore. Papa tried to make it up to me, and that’s that. I just don’t want to be disappointed again. I realized then that I should change how I view things. I should just be thankful that despite all that, I have the people who believe in me and love me. My Nanay and my Dello. They are my safe zone. I am where I belong when I am with them.

Everything was going well. Or so I thought. I stayed at my dorm and dello stayed at his when we got into college. I took up BS in Business Administration. It was so hard to leave Nanay behind, but I need to study in Manila. And besides, the trip to Cavite is just over an hour, and I can go home anytime if there is a need to. Nanay would teach me her recipes every time I would go home on weekend.

It was hard to adjust. I am not used to living alone. That’s why Dello and I would always check on each other. He was very caring.

‘’Let’s eat samgyupsal, love’’ smiling widely at me. He would always take me to eat when I’m stressed with my schoolwork.

I would always noticed how his furrowed brows almost became a line. I immediately know that he is stressed. ‘’You okay, love?’’ His eyes met mine when I asked. He just shook his head. ‘’Can I get a hug?’’ Why is he so adorable? He was sitting, waiting for my hug. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders as he hugged my stomach and buried his face there. We stayed like that for a few minutes, seeking comfort in each other’s arms.

But since he met his law professor, things have been rocky. There is a rumor circulating back then that the respected Atty. Richard Buencamino had been harassing and sexually assaulting his students and associates.

Of course, I didn't immediately believe the rumors. Not until he became our substitute teacher in economics in my 2nd year. He has this aura that makes me doubt him and I just can’t explain it. I knew how the way he talks because of our discussions. I know I shouldn't be judging him because I only knew him for about four months. But there is something about him that I am not comfortable with.

The way he looks at his students, most especially to us girls, bothers me. I told that to Dello. He would just tell me that I shouldn’t believe the rumors. Atty. Buencamino became his teacher in law under his course, legal management. He would always tell me how good his professor is and how he helps them.

I decided to ignore that uncomfortable feeling. Besides it’s not like he was proven guilty of those gossips, and I just had to accept it especially when Dello started working part time in Atty. Buencamino’s firm. He said it would help him in the future whether he would pursue law or business.

I was waiting for Dello at La Frida. Who would have thought? That boy who gave me a handkerchief under the Narra tree. That boy who I tutored because he was failing his statistics class. That same boy who I have been with for the past 6 years. Despite what happened to my parents, Dello made me believe in love again.

I was sitting at the reserved table for us while looking around. The place was full of Frida Kahlo’s self-portrait. It was a sight to watch. A waiter comes up and asked if I would like to order, but I just shook my head and told him I was waiting for someone.

I glanced at my watch. 9:47. We agreed to have dinner at 8pm, maybe he was running late. I told him that we can just meet at the restaurant because I know he has a lot on his plate right now. After graduation, Atty. Buencamino offered him a job at the firm which he gladly accepts. I don’t agree on him working under his former professor but what can I do? I couldn't afford to take away his smiles whenever he tells me how much he enjoys his work.

When he started working, we rarely met. Sometimes I would feel like sulking because he couldn't make time for me, but I’d always remind myself that he was doing it for his family. For us. And besides, I was also busy figuring out what I wanted to do with my life. I have thought of building a restaurant with Nanay’s recipes on the menu. And I need to work in order to do that, that’s why I applied as an employee on a café and tutored some kids. I moved to my little apartment after graduation, so I need to work harder.

I miss our dates. When we were in high school, we would just eat outside the school and talk about random things while walking home. That changed in college because college is that stressful. We would just eat pares or we would just lounge in his dorm while studying.

I was reminiscing our memories when a waiter comes up again. ‘’Ma'am, maybe what you're waiting for won't come. I'm sorry but we're going to close. Do you still want to order?’’ it was like he pitied me by the way he looks at me.

Deja vu. It's the same situation I had experienced with papa. My heart clenched when I remembered and clenched again that Dello stood me up at our 6th anniversary.

I thanked the waiter and made my way out of the restaurant. While doing so, I tried calling dello, but he was not answering.

I was lying in bed. I can’t sleep, thinking about how our anniversary went. I opened my facebook and the first thing I saw is dello, smiling widely in between Atty. Buencamino and his daughter, Elira with two good-looking middle-aged men. They were holding wine flutes. It was Elira’s post with the caption, ‘A well-deserved celebration. Congrats to us!’

I’m not friends with Elira on facebook but dello was tagged so I saw it. I turned off my phone. I closed my eyes and tried to sleep, telling myself to not think about it.

My sleep was disturbed when someone knocked on the door with urgency. I looked at the window, it’s now morning. I was fixing myself while coming to the door. Dello's guilty face was the first thing I saw when I opened the door.

‘’I love you. Sorry, love. I did not forget I promise! I just—'’ I cut him off. ‘’It’s okay. I understand’’ the way he looked at me tells me that he is not convinced with my answer. ‘’No, it’s not. Solas, I ditched you! On our freaking anniversary! I’m so sorry, our client called an emergency meeting, and I couldn’t just leave. I know you’re mad and I--‘’ I cut him off again.

‘’You could’ve at least texted me because I would understand that you’ve had an emergency. I can compromise. I can always adjust for you. We could celebrate our anniversary the next day if you couldn’t make it today. You know I would understand. all I’m asking for is just a text. is it that hard?’’ My heart clenched when I remembered last night. ‘’I just hope you didn't keep me waiting like that. Because I felt like the occasion yesterday was taken for granted. I felt like I was taken for granted’’ He stayed silent. I grabbed the cake from his hands and made my way to the kitchen because my tears are already welling up.

I was looking at the cake, the Happy Anniversary, My Love was carefully written in frosting. I was opening the box when a pair of arms wrapped around my waist. I was stunned. He placed his head on the nook of my neck. He kept whispering sorry. I couldn’t take it anymore that I burst into tears. He must’ve sensed it, so he turned me to face him. As he was wiping my tears, I noticed his wet cheeks. I lifted my hands to wipe it. ‘’I’m sorry, Dello’’ He shook his head repeatedly. ‘’No. No. It’s my fault. Please, solas. Call me, love again. I’m sorry love’’ I hugged him. I couldn’t bear to see him like this. It’s okay love. I hate to see you cry. Please don’t cry now.

It was just the start. After that, Dello and I had more fights. If he was busy back then, he became much busier after they closed the deal from one of their biggest clients. He would just sometimes call me at night. Or when he is free at his breaks, I would go to his office just so we can meet. There are times that I want to get mad at him, but I always choose to understand his shortcomings. He was doing it for the future. And I hope that I am included in that future.

I noticed the changes. His things, from clothes to shoes, it all became designer. When I asked him where he got it, he said his boss gave it to him. When he said that, it was as if my old hunch and uncomfortable feeling towards his boss resurfaced. And my suspicion intensified when he said he’ll move, to the condo that their company gave him. Please don’t. I wanted to tell him that I am against his decision to move because I feel uncomfortable about Atty. Buencamino.

I feel like the longer he stays in his job and the more he accepts those ‘’gifts’’ from them, it is the more he buried himself to them. It was like he will be forever indebted to them because of those incentives and token.

There was this one day that we agreed to meet at his office so we could have lunch together. ‘’Haha, I know, pañero. He’s doing well. I was right about choosing him. in a few years, Dyson would run my firm and marry my daughter, Elira. And don’t worry about Fariah, she will no longer be a hindrance to us’’ I stopped on my tracks when I heard that voice. Dyson? Is he talking about my Dyson Lorenzo? The door was ajar that’s why I can hear his voice. When I heard movements from the inside of what looked like a conference room, I hurriedly left the place. The whole lunch I was bothered by what I’ve heard. I was thinking of telling it to Dello. But when I saw his smiles while telling me how he was the past few days, I was torn.

I was on my way home when Nanay called me telling me that my high school classmate, Fariah, was found dead on the city hall’s parking lot. I was shocked. I hurriedly went home only to see Dello standing at my door, waiting for me. ‘’Why are you in a hurry, love’’ he looked puzzled. I just shrugged and went on to open the t.v.

It was in the news. I remembered the conversation of Atty. Buencamino and whoever it was at the conference room. Does he involve in this? I’ve decided to tell what I’ve heard to Dello after eating the Chinese food he got us for dinner.

I was expecting that we would fight if I voiced out what I knew and what I feel.

But what happened was the least expected.

I never thought that dello could yell at me like that. rage was visible in his eyes, telling me that I shouldn't believe all those rumors and maybe I just misheard what his boss said. ''or maybe you're just jealous of Elira that's why you're poisoning my mind to make me think that they are that bad. you know what, solas? you’ve changed. you’re not like this. I am so tired of my work. I am so tired providing for my family and i am so tired of you! I no longer know how to divide my time for all of you!’’ He took a deep breath before saying the words I never thought he could ever say to me. Because he loves me, right? ‘’I’m sorry, Consolascion. But maybe it’s the end for us. I- ‘’ He took another deep breath. ‘’I’m breaking up with you’’.

I was just staring at him. I was just staring at him. watching him break my heart into pieces that I don't know if I could still collect those pieces again after that night. when he figured out that I won't say anything, he picked up his belongings and made his way out of my apartment. out of my life.

I pushed the door of my restaurant and hurriedly went to my car. I was running late and today was the graduation of Wontone. Of course, I should be there. I always teach him, and I am so proud that he will graduate as a valedictorian. I was nearing his school when my phone rang.

‘’Where are you, solas? You need to be here!’’ I pulled the phone away from my ear when I heard Winston's annoying and hurried voice. ‘’You’re thinking about your ex again that’s why you’re late! Am I right or am I right?’’ I rolled my eyes. What the hell? I was about to answer him when he did the thing, he is best at, being overacting. ‘’Don't think about it because he doesn't think about you. Maybe he doesn't even know you anymore because he's so successful now! Big time, one of the finest lawyers in the whole country ang ex! Kalerks’’ ugh! I really can’t with this person! Why was I even friends with him?

I met Winston and Wontone again when I moved to Cagayan de Oro. I was at the mall when wontone approached me, I couldn’t remember it at first, but he showed me his baby picture in his wallet, and I immediately recognized his dumpling face. We went to his Kuya Winston and finally, I knew what his name was. They also moved in CDO a few years before I came because their parents opened a business here. I had been friends with them since then. Winston helped me continue my life. He was there when I had no one. He always made me feel that he got my back. And I am so thankful for that.

But what kind of best friend would update you on the things happening to your ex-boyfriend?! When he learned that my ex was the great Atty. Dyson Lorenzo, he just wouldn’t stop feeding me news about him. it’s not that I’m mad at Dello, in fact I am happy for him. He has reached his dream. And I also learned that he left the law firm of Atty. Buencamino 2 months after our break-up. I was glad that he chose what was right.

I am not mad at him. Maybe I just felt alone that time. The day after we broke up, our neighbor called me, saying Nanay was rushed to the hospital. My heart shattered as if it could be broken even more. I was worried the whole ride to the hospital. When I arrived, Nanay already left. She didn’t even wait for me and all I can do is to cry while hugging the lifeless body of my Nanay.

I remember when I just moved in Nanay’s house. She would always brush my hair before bedtime.

‘’Nanay, would it be much better if I just go with mama? Or papa? But if I come with mama back then, she would just be irritated at me because she thinks I would ruin his relationship with John. And if I come with papa, I would just feel ashamed because they looked so happy, especially now that his new wife just gave birth. She looks nice but I feel like I don’t belong there. Where should I be, Nanay?’’ I looked up to her. ‘’Here, my dear. With me. This is where you should be’’ she said smiling widely at me.

‘’Nanay, what will happen to me now? Where should I be now that you’re gone?’’ I said, crying. Mourning. Alone.

I was mourning for Dello and I’s break-up. I was mourning for the death of my Nanay. I was mourning for myself.

Nanay was cremated. After the funeral, I was so lost. I didn’t know how and where to start. Thank God, when Tita Jessi heard about the death of Nanay, she immediately contacted me. She was the half-sister of mama. She offered to help me only if I would come with her to CDO. I agreed because I didn’t know what to do at that time. She has a cafeteria business that doesn’t earning very well. She asked me if I could help her run it. Of course, I agreed and suggested to do a total make-over in her business. It was a start. Everything, from the menu to the appearance of the place. The new menu was all the recipes I’ve learned from Nanay. I was still mourning, and I miss her dearly, but I know that she will be happy if I continue my life. Running the restaurant and cooking helps me remember Nanay.

Sometimes, I would still think of Dello. How he is and what is he doing. I tried calling him when I was on my way to the hospital. He didn’t answer. I tried again when I’ve known that Nanay left me. I tried again on those following days, because maybe he was busy. I tried, countless times, because I feel so alone. And maybe I was thinking that he would answer, even just once, even if he doesn’t say something. I just needed a friend that time. I needed someone who could listen to my pain and sorrows. I just thought he would pick up because despite all that had happened, I still treasure him. and I still have his back. But maybe it’s not the same. He didn’t feel the same. And I don’t know but I felt betrayed even if he no longer has a responsibility to me because we broke up. I felt like it seems so easy for him to forget everything.

I held back my tears when I remembered it all. I composed myself before going out of the car and I already saw Winston walking towards me. ‘’Bakla! You’re late again!’’ he said like he didn’t say it earlier on the phone. I just rolled my eyes on him while walking to the venue. ‘’How dare you roll your eyes on me! hmp! I have some news about your ever gorgeous ex-boyfriend!’’ when will he ever stop updating me about the life of Dello? ‘’Not interested’’ his looks tell me that he doesn’t believe me. ‘’Even if it’s about Atty. Buencamino?’’ I turned to him. ‘’What about him?’’ he rolled his eyes. ‘’I thought you’re not interested. Well anyways, here’s the tea. Atty. Richard Buencamino was found guilty of murder, sexual assault and harassment, and corruption and falsification of public documents by the court’’ I stopped walking while Winston continues to read that news. Wow. At last, he will pay for all his sins and justice will be served. ‘’When is that news? And who is the lawyer?’’ Winston looked at me bewildered. ‘’ uh, it was just last week and I’m sorry I delivered it late. I don’t know who the lawyer is. Why?’’ I shrugged.

I was still shocked by what I’ve just heard but we need to attend the graduation of my dumpling. When we arrived at the venue, there were many students seated. The speaker’ voice seems familiar to me.

And when I lifted my gaze to the stage, I saw him. The person who made me feel loved and broke my heart. His eyes found mine. He stopped talking when he saw me. For a few second, we were just looking at each other. A staff called his attention and he quickly composed himself and continued the speech. When I looked at Winston, his mouth was agape, and his eyes widened. ‘’it’s your ex! Omg!’’ I rolled my eyes on him. Here we go again.

It was Wantone’s speech after Dello’s. I glanced his way, and he was looking at me also. I withdrew my stare and focused on the dumpling. I probably looked like a stage mom. My eyes swell when he mentioned me on his speech. I am so proud of him. It seems like only yesterday when he was this little chubby dumpling that couldn’t climb on the swing. Winston looked at me when he saw I was wiping my cheeks. ‘’Tss. Why are you crying like you are wontone’s mom?’’ I just ignored him.

When the ceremony ended, we took photos. There is a feast in winston’s house to celebrate wontone’s graduation. I was about to get in the car when someone called my name. I turned around only to see Atty. Dyson Lorenzo walking towards me in his white dress shirt that was tucked in his slacks.

‘’Attorney! How are you?’’ I tried my best to be casual. Don’t be nervous, solas. It’s just him. ‘’I’m okay, solas. What about you? I was wondering if we could talk over a cup of coffee. Are you free today?’’ I tried not to stutter. ‘’I- ah, I need to go to a celebration today, sorry’’ he shook his head. ‘’No, it’s fine. I- ahm, can I get your number so we could set our reunion?’’ I laughed at the term ‘reunion’. I said yes and gave him my number. I bid my goodbye to him but before he let me leave, he made me promise to have a ‘reunion’ with him. And just like what I did when he asks me to be his girl, I just found myself nodding to him.

I was quiet the whole ride home. I am still absorbing all the things Dello just told me. Our ‘Reunion’ was at a restaurant. I was teasing him that he reserved the whole place just for this to happen because we we’re almost the only people there. It was so awkward at first but when he started telling me what happened to him after our breakup, I started tearing up. He said I was right when I told him that they are giving him all these luxurious gifts for him to be indebted to them. He started seeing the things I told him before. How wrong the behavior and morals of Atty. Buencamino is. He was contemplating if he would resign when his boss told him that he had a plan of arranging his marriage with her daughter, Elira. When I asked him what made him leave the company and sued his boss, he smiled bitterly at me. ‘’I just can’t keep quiet. When I saw him sexually harassing one of my co-workers, I’ve reached my limit. I resigned. I thought about you, solas. All these years what you were telling me was right. He is evil. That’s why I vowed to myself that I will make him pay and justice will be served. I vowed to myself that I would fix that first then I would find you to say sorry. I’m so sorry, Solas’’

I smiled at Dello. I am so proud of him. He went through all of that by his self. He went through all of that while studying law. I am so proud because he topped the bar despite all the challenges he was facing. I told him that it’s okay. And when he asked me how I were on those times, I couldn’t help my tears. I was crying while telling him how I was at my lowest when we broke up and how I lost myself when Nanay left me. I told him all the things I was supposed to tell him when he wasn’t answering his phone. All those things I felt when I was all alone, wondering where I belong in this world.

He cried, saying sorry that he wasn’t there. That night, we cried together. Telling each other all the things we missed when we were apart. Telling each other countless sorry for all the shortcomings and for not being there. It was a bittersweet moment for us. All the pain of yesterday returned and it was as if the wounds in the past was reopened. Yet, it was also relieving. All those heavy feelings that we were carrying all these years was lifted. Gone. And forgiven.

The door chime rang as someone opened it. I was at the cashier of my restaurant. When I looked at the door, I saw Winston. I asked Ruby, a staff in the resto to replace me as I entertain my friend. He ordered some drinks. ‘’So, what brought you here, Win?’’ He sipped on his juice. “I’m here to gossip. I was informed that your Atty. is frequently coming here, and you always eat together? What. Are you two back together?’’ I rolled my eyes at his words. What the hell. It had been almost a year when Dello and I had our ‘reunion’ and he had been coming back here. I know that he is hinting that he wants me back, but maybe I am waiting for a sign. I still have feelings for him. it stayed with me for all these years, and I know it will until the day I die. I was just waiting for that sign.

Winston had been staying in Pangasinan for months and he just came back last week. I have a hunch that it was Ruby who told him about dello because Ruby has a crush on him. Little did she know Win also likes men. ‘’So basically, you have been dating him for over a year. What are you waiting for, solas? You’re not getting any younger, FYI’’ I stared at him intently. ‘’So, you’re saying that?’’ he rolled his eyes on me. Remind me again how did he became my best friend? ‘’What I’m saying is you should make the most out of it. Make him your boyfriend already! Duh! You’re not in high school anymore. Don’t play hard to get. At this point you should be getting married already’’ Maybe the heavens heard all my prayers. This is the sign I am waiting for.

I followed Winston’s advice. It was what I want. Sometimes what Win says also makes sense. Dello and I had been together for 2 years now. I am on my way to my restaurant because we will dine together to celebrate our 2nd anniversary. Dello keep on insisting that it was our 8th, and I would just roll my eyes on him.

When I got out of the car, my brows furrowed. Why are the lights turned off? I opened the door and I look for Ruby because she was in charged for tonight. I fish out my phone on my bag and tried to call her when I’ve seen no one at the resto. A phone rang at the cashier, and I was about to pick it up when the lights turned on. Confetti was scattered everywhere as they say, 'happy anniversary'. All the staffs are here together with Winston, Wontone, Tita Jessi and the friends of Dello was also here! I even saw Patrick! I was about to ask who prepared these and where is Dello when I heard his voice. I turned around to see Dello holding a mic, singing our favorite song.

“Have I ever told you

I want you to the bone?

Have I ever called you

When you are all alone?

And if I ever forget

To tell you how I feel

Listen to me now, babe

I want you to the bone”

I was crying while watching him sing. i feel like my heart will explode with so much joy.

“I want you to-

Take me home, I'm fallin'

Love me long, I'm rollin'

Losing control, body, and soul

Mind too for sure, I'm already yours

Walk you down, I'm all in

Hold you tight, you call and

I'll take control your body and soul

Mind too for sure, I'm already yours

Would that be alright?

Hey, would that be alright?

I want you to the bone, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh

So bad I can't breathe, oh, oh, oh, oh, ooh

I want you to the bone”

My face was a mess when the song ended. I just keep on crying. ‘’Consolascion Valdez, we’ve been through so much. I know we have our shortcomings, our mistakes, and we have hurt each other before. Despite all of that, my love for you stayed here’’ he pointed his index on to his heart. ‘’it did not, even once, faltered. My love for you gets stronger every day. I want you to the bones, solas’’ I laughed when he said that. He smiled at me and continued. ‘’I now know where my place is in this world. In your arms. In the home we will build with our future children. That is where I belong. We have spent years apart from each other to grow and learn, but I now want to grow and learn with you’’ He took a deep breath and looked at me. The same way he looked at me the first time we saw each other.

There’s something in his stare that I can’t seem to take my eyes off him.

Patrick went to him and elbowed him because we were just staring at each other. I laughed at the sight. Just like our first meeting.

Dello smiled at me. Happiness is visible in his eyes, yet I can also see that he’s nervous.

He knelt on one of his knees. I was still crying. ‘’Solas, My love. Will you spend the rest of your life with me?’’ he opened the handkerchief that was folded into a triangle. I looked down to meet his eyes as I nodded. Of course, love. I’m more than willing to spend my life with you.

The people around us cheered as Dello hugged me. He buried his head on the nook of my neck. I held his shoulders to see his face. I smiled widely at him. ‘’The handkerchief was hilarious. I really can’t with you!’’ I laughed at him. ‘’You’re still the same mischievous boy who gave me his handkerchief under the Narra tree’’ He laughed at me, and he went down to steal a chaste kiss on my lips

I looked into his eyes. ‘’I love you, Dello’’ I said with all my heart. He went back on hugging me and whispered, ‘’I love you more, love’’

The joy in my heart is unwavering. All the pain and sacrifices in the past was worth it. All those can’t compare to the happiness I am feeling right now. We were like that for minutes, and I realized one thing. The comfort I feel when I am in his arms. I realized that I belong here, in his arms.

All my life, I have been finding my place in this world. I thought I had found it, but it was shattered into pieces, so did I. Things happen, and it’s hard to weigh our choices and accept the consequences of those actions. We have our mistakes and we had hurt each other yet, through my darkest days, hoping and holding on to our love was the only thing that kept me going. I know someday, we will be able to find our place. We will know where we belong. His love kept me sane, and after years and years of finding, I now know, this is where I belong.

Photo credits to Queen J<3

#WWB #heygerds #solas #dello #WhereWeBelong

0 notes