#whereas in the bathroom he is in an objectively worse mental state & more consistently dissociative despite being sober . yet he actively— | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

charliespringverse · 1 year ago

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... it's just hit me that lister describes the bathroom kiss as assault and even when jimmy reassures him that he doesn't see it that way and doesn't have a problem with it, lister refuses to accept that it was anything other than objectively assault

while two days earlier jimmy insisted that a 32-yr-old having sex with lister at age 16 was wrong, despite lister not seeing it that way and not having a problem with it

does that mean that lister took that conversation on board but only as far as "the person on the receiving end of an advance can't accurately assess whether or not it was wrong" and is now equating himself to the woman that took advantage of him . because i will weep

#i am conflicted about the bathroom kiss to an extent #because on the one hand . do not kiss someone without asking dude wtf #but also . the difference in jimmy's response to it compared to the magnet situation which is? relatively similar #w magnet he was 'this is fine'ing his whole way through it and forcing himself to be ok with it and would've likely kept going if—#— lister hadn't interrupted it #whereas in the bathroom he is in an objectively worse mental state & more consistently dissociative despite being sober . yet he actively—#— considers it and almost goes along with it before deciding for Both his and lister's sakes not to #and i think his clarity & consideration there as well as the fact he felt Safe to pull away is meaningful to an extent #because it's one of the only situations this week where he's actually felt & acted on a sense of control over what happens to him #+ lister's immediate reaction being to back off and recognise his being at fault and never once holding it against jimmy #like again . should not have happened do not kiss ppl without asking #but i do find myself viewing it in a very different light to the v comparable magnet situation #anygay i am rambling in tags again when i should be asleep but still #i worry that lister is now viewing himself in the same light as jimmy views the ppl that took advantage of lister #but i Also worry that he is viewing himself as Worse than those ppl bc he can't/won't accept that he was taken advantage of #i do also now kind of want to write a Lister In Therapy oneshot partly just for the catharsis of imagining that boy getting some gd therapy #iwbftreread

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