#where the fuck is the food at if its not in tummy shutting that bitch up?

[roses-n-rads]

Me @ my tummy: shut up I am feeding you!

[redhawtriot]

Could I possibly have a scenario with a fem s/o who is constantly high but yet Bakugou can’t help but fall in love :) thanks in advance!

Anonymous- “Can I pls get first date with bakugo and reader goes to pay for her half and bakugo shits her down with some tsundere ass response like “I just know if you pay for this you’re gonna complain you dont have money to buy other shit.”

Tip Jar ☕- Not expected but always appreciated💞

I mashed these two request together!

Enjoy the fluff while it last cuz it’s finna get ANGSTY in this bitch!

HnM💕

How Stop liking a Stoner (Bakugou x Reader)

Bakugou absolutely hated you. Of course he didn’t get along with most people that he met, but the way that he despised you felt different  from others somehow. 

It all began the day that the two of you met. You had walked into class with a very distinct odor. You considered yourself to be a professional at hiding your more delinquent lifestyle; however, masked away under the layers of fruity and sweet perfumes that you had coated yourself in, was a slight, but very recognizable, dank and smokey smell.

You also had certain mannerisms that could alert even the purest of minds to your…ahem… extra-curricular actives.

Now, you weren’t a complete noob. You could handle the high well enough that you weren’t overly quiet, or loud, but you did often find yourself in situations that could expose your habits: such as when Mina asked you to feel how soft a furry piece of her hero costume was, and you ended up petting it for a few uncomfortable minutes before someone called you out, snapping you out of your trance.

Bakugou, being the ever perceptive grump that he was, noticed any of these sorts of slip ups and drew up the conclusion that you were indeed a stoner.   

But that wasn’t even what he could bring himself to hate about you. No, it was the way that you made him feel whenever you were around that made him wholy despise you. 

When you stupidly giggled at every slight occurrence, he could only replay the sound in his head over and over. Disgusting. When you absentmindedly swayed your body in a slight dance during lectures he couldn’t help but to watch you with a terrifyingly light feeling in his chest. Fucking gross. Even as you sat chomping on the insane mountain of snacks that you brought to class, he couldn’t fight the urge to steal glances at the little smile that was perpetually plastered onto your face. Absolutely adorable. WAIT? WHAT THE FUCK?! 

God, he couldn’t stand your ass.

The furious blond found himself sitting at his desk, glaring at his laptop. He sat in thought for a moment before violently popping his knuckles and leaning into the search engine in front of him, allowing his fingers get to work.

Is marijuana bad for you? 

Bakugou scrolled along the first page and found many differing views on the subject, but most scientific articles and studies mostly said the same things: “maybe”, “it depends”, and “we don’t know.” He groaned in frustration, before trying another phrasing of his question,

Can smoking have long term effects? 

The teen was surprised by the overwhelming amount data that appeared, before realizing that they were mostly referencing to cigarettes and cigars. He growled and angrily smashed his fingers against his keyboard to correct his question.

Can smoking weed have long term effects?

As he eyeballed his screen he was once again disappointed by very vague and unclear answers. He slammed a fist onto his laptop in frustration. How the hell could you put that shit into your body without knowing what it would do to you later?! 

Wait. A better, more pressing question shoved itself into his mind.

WHY THE HELL DID HE CARE SO DAMN MUCH ABOUT WHAT YOU WERE DOING?!

Bakugou groaned in frustration and roughly snatched a fist full of his hair, as if he were trying to rip you clean out of his mind. He knew for a fact that mind-altering wasn’t your damn quirk. So why the hell does he give a fuck about you? You weren’t even around him, yet he found himself having his thoughts wander to your well being. It pissed him off. 

Bakugou once more smacked his fingers against his keyboard as he typed one final question,

How to stop liking someone?

As soon as he saw the words flash across his screen, it was like the weight of the entire situation finally cracked something inside of him. Shit. He did like you. The boy suddenly slammed his laptop shut and threw it away from him like it had suddenly disgusted him.

He then decided that he was going to pretend like the last hour of his life just didn’t happen. Yeah he was gonna “control, alt, delete” the fuck out of every thought he just had. 

God dammit, he didn’t have time to dwell on crushes if he was going to be the number one hero! That stupid, delinquent girl wasn’t going to get any more of his time or thoughts!!

But.

It seemed like fate had something else planned as you hurriedly walked to your classroom, 1-A, the next morning. You absolutely couldn’t risk being late today. You hadn’t had enough time to grab your eye drops that morning and Aizawa would certainly notice your altered state if attention was drawn to you. 

The hallway ahead of you moved in choppy frames before you finally whipped a turn to enter the door of your classroom. As soon as you turned into the class, you were slapped with a warm sturdy object, sending you flying back onto your butt.

Bakugou immediately thrashed his body around to confront whatever idiot just knocked into him, “HEY WATCH WHERE YOU’RE…” he trailed off as he recognized your figure. Your lunch box that you had been holding had spilled its contents all over you, but the dirty sight of you was somehow still enough to make his heart throb, “…going.” he finally finished.

“Sorry, Bakugou,” you apologized as you rubbed the side your your head, trying to stabilize your whirling mind, “Oh, man! My food!” you sadly exclaimed as you recognized the pathetic mess of snacks and small meals you had prepped for your day all over the floor and yourself.

The sight of your frown in contrast to your usual happiness gave Bakugou’s chest a twinge of pain. He growled at the emotion as he glared at you on the ground, “Well, maybe you should get your head out of the damn clouds and watch where you are going!” he yelled before stiffly turning on his heel and heading to his seat. 

You blinked in surprise at his retreating figure. Well, you hadn’t exactly expected him to apologize or help you or anything, but you also didn’t expect to see the blush that creeped across his face before he stormed off. 

Huh.

You cleaned yourself up easily enough. Honestly, the situation and Bakugou’s subsequent outburst had helped you make it through the day without getting suspended, drug tested or expelled. By the time you cleaned yourself up and made it back to the classroom, your eyes had pretty much returned to their normal state. 

Today might not be so bad after all!

GrrrrRRRrrRRrrr, your stomach screeched, causing almost all of your classmates to whip their heads toward you in surprise. 

Shit…

You hurriedly grabbed your stomach with a nervous laugh, trying to console the despairing little monster; however, you still spent the rest of the school day with your tummy loudly yelling at you. Watching everyone eat during lunch was absolute torture as your stomach cursed at you for being so damn clumsy. You honestly could have died. 

Death by munchies.

However, it seems as if the cannabis lords took pity on you that day and you actually made it through your last class. You were the first one out of their desk as you rushed out of the classroom and down the hall— the thought of food on your mind, but suddenly you felt a heavy hand snatch your wrist,

“Hey, idiot!” When you looked back your eyebrows shot straight up at the sight of Bakugou’s hardened expression, “Let’s go grab some food.”

Um… hWhat? The suggestion completely threw you off balance. You shook your head as if the vibrations that just came in through your ear needed some readjusting,  “Like… together?” you tilted your head in shock. You’ve never seen Bakugou willingly hang with anyone else besides Kirishima, let alone initiate an event with them!

Bakugou fumed at your questioning appearance, “Are you really that stupid!? I could hear your stomach growling from across the classroom!!”

You giggled at yourself in embarrassment, not quite sure of what else you could do in the moment, “…Why do you care?” you laughed.

Your laughed sent a searing wave of heat to his face. You’d… never directed this display of happiness toward him before, and for some reason it made him feel extremely hot,

“I don’t!” he yelled as he tried to fight the warmth away, “I just knocked your food down earlier and… I don’t want to owe you anything,” he suddenly noticed that he was still clinging to your hand. The heat in his face doubled as he snatched his hand away from yours, “So where do you wanna go? I am not taking no for an answer,” he began as he walked away from U.A.’s campus with a rigid nod for you to follow him. 

You paused for a moment. Is this real? 

A large smile began spreading itself across your face– the cannabis lords once gain raining mercy down upon you, “Maybe a… Mcdonalds!” you happily suggested as you skipped into a light jog ran to catch up with him.

“Mc.. donalds?” Bakugou threw you an expression that resided in an area between horrified and disgusted for a moment before correcting himself back into his comfortable anger, looking at the ground as the two of you walked.

“Yeah, like the clown place!” you added. Bakugou growled at your answer. He wasn’t a fucking idiot he knew what a damn McDonald’s was. You laughed at his response as you continued, “You’re not scared of clowns are you, tough guy?” you teased.

“Fuck you,” he simply huffed, refusing to even entertain your accusations. 

“Wow, on the first date?” you boldly retorted with a stifled laugh, causing him to falter in his steps for a moment. He snapped himself out of whatever stupid emotion he felt at your words, 

“IT’S NOT A DAMN DATE!” he roared, causing you to simply shrug, a pleased smile on your face as you continued to walk without him. 

“Where are you going, you idiot?! There is a Mcdonald’s right there!” he angrily gestured to the golden arches the other direction of where you were headed. 

“I like the one by my house better,” you explained, “It had a gas station attached to it, so I can grab some snacks on the way out.”

….

G-gas Station McDonald’s….? Bakugou could have thrown up right then and there. 

“DISGUSTING!” the blond screeched, “I am not walking all the way over there just to walk back to the dorm! Are you an idiot?!”

Alright. Who the fuck did this to him? Made him crush on a complete loser?! Cupid? God?! He was gonna fight whoever the fuck it was! 

“Fineeee,” you laughed and the two of you walked over to the inferior McDonalds. Bakugous eyes widened in repulsion as you ordered both a Big-Mac meal and a twenty piece chicken nugget with a dozen cookies.

As soon as you happily reached out to give the cashier your money, he swatted your hand away and shoved his own cash at the associates face, “No, take mine.” he harshly ordered. The employee shakily agreed and accepted his money. 

You threw him a confused glance but before you could even open your mouth to question him, he spoke up, “I just know that if you pay for this, you’re gonna complain that you don’t have money to buy other shit,” he explained, a faint blush creeping onto his cheeks. 

You noticed this red tint, but decided to tease him instead of pointing it out, “Yeah, like gas,” you nodded with a sly smile. 

“Gas? You’re fifteen and don’t have a damn car, you idiot,” He argued, but the boy immediately paused as soon as he saw the suggestive expression that you held on your face. Things finally clicked as soon as you wiggled your eyebrows towards him. Gas… you meant weed. He angrily snatched the two soda cups that the cashier was extending out as he loudly yelled at you,  “FUCK! YOU MAKE IT SO DAMN HARD TO BE NICE TO YOU, YOU KNOW THAT?!” He screamed as you cracked up at his uncharacteristically slow uptake.

The two of you had decided to eat at a booth near a window. You found yourself being really surprised at the quality of this McDonald’s chairs. Bakugou loudly chastised you for gawking at the chairs like some freak before the two of you promptly began eating your food. 

It was mostly quiet between the two of you as the textures of the meal performed on your sensitive tongue until Bakugou finally spoke up, “Why do you put that nasty shit into your body?”

“Uh,” Your eyes danced away for a split second, “McDonalds?” your faced crinkled in confusion.

“No, you dumbass!” Bakugou fought the urge to facepalm, “marijuana!” he angrily corrected.

Oh… you felt yourself deflate for a moment, as the question absorbed into your mind. You suddenly let out a giggle, “I don’t know. It makes me feel good, I guess.” Bakugou had to fight another blush at the sight of you adorably shrugging your shoulders. 

“That’s a stupid answer. You can’t feel good on your own?”

You tilted your head as you thought about it for a moment. Of course, you could feel good on your own. Just take a look at you! You weren’t even very high anymore, yet you were still on cloud nine right now for some reason, “Well… I feel good right now with you.”

That did it. His adrenaline flared up in an instant. Bakugou couldn’t even come up with fluid words as a series of death threats and curses instinctively flooded to the forefront of his mind,  “S-shut up.”

You giggled at his loss for words before letting the conversation die again. The two of you once again found yourselves in silence as you sat with a smile on your face.

This time, it was you who broke the silence, “Thank you, for hanging out with me today. I really appreciate it.”

“Whatever, loser. Don’t get used to it,” he huffed, angrily stuffing a few fries into his mouth. 

“So…. there’s not a second date ahead?”

“I didn’t say that,” he grumbled, snatching his glare away from you and out of the restaurant window. 

So it was a date. A huge smile once again spread across your face for the millionth time that evening. You happily plopped another fry into your mouth at the sight of him blushing once more. 

[voidselfshipp]

Revenge

Cw:violence angst but a nice ending.

Ok to rb

A/n :I let my frustration out on this one, it happends after the first New cómics where fuse is kidnapped And maggie tries to convince him to go back to salvo, he then scapes with lifeline and bloodhound.

--Do you mind explaining me how this happened?--Jerico said pointing at the now destroyed Kings cannion.

--Well,remember Maggie?-- fuse said putting at arm protectively around jeris neck pulling her closer-- yeah well shes out for vengance

--yikes-- octane says concentrated on his game.

Jer sighed pressing a kiss to fuses temple-- well ive got to go and check it out

--There might still be some balanced rocks 'round It--horizon added, fixing newt-- ye be carefull dearie

Jerico laughs and shakes her head-- y'all are babying me too much, ill be just fine-- she kisses Walter and walks to the dropships platform.

High heeled quick steps are heard as loba walks to jeri-- youre forgetting something

She rolls her eyes looking at loba-- you too?

She nodds, and jer playfully groans kissing her.

--Look at you two! So adorable-- wattson coos as lifeline raises a brow.

-- well it looks like old fuse here doesnt like it-- ajay added with a playfull smirk

Jer shakes her head saying her goodbyes and dropping into the destroyed Kings cannyon.

She wrote soundly on her iPad,looking at the damage done by maggies temper trantrum-- banners mostly destroyed, infrastracture of bunker Severly damaged...--she muttered under her breath.

**theres Someone watching**

A voice whispers to jerico as she turns around, knife to the throat of her assailant.

--Jesus christ hound! You scared me!

Bloodhound puts their hands up-- ah im sorry my dear-- they said-- fuse sent me to watch over you...

Jer sighs putting her dagger back in her pocket-- you need to stop sneaking up on me

Hound shrugs-- the gods Will tell me when its my time to go

--And to valhalla youll go if you Keep scaring me like that

They takes her arm and they walk togheter as she keeps doing her work.

--After what happened with maggie,hows fuse holding up?

The tracker pet their raven looking away-- well he seems to be shook, maggie had a bad Effect on him,even now hes still a bit quieter than usual

Jer nodded putting her iPad on her backpack.

Bloodhound tilts their head-- what is it that youre thinking?-- they asked.

--Maggie wont stop until she gets fuse back to salvo..--she trailed off looking at the Mark in her hand.

--You cannot intervene with fate, you know that fully well-- they said,putting a hand on her shoulder-- it is not our place to make that desicion for him, we'll Keep him safe.. one way or another...

Jer shook her head--hound I have to ask you a favor, hand this to crypto--she said handing them her bag-- he'll know what to do,I myself have a bitch to hunt down...

Before they can say anything jerico sprints, knocking over some rocks so they cant follow.

Hound is left there-- May the all father help us all--they whisper walking back to the dropship.

The transmition tower was still intact somehow, with savage Winds she climbs it, her hand presses against one of the cables.

Even bloodhound can feel the waves coming from it as they sit to Sharpen their Knife.

Its like a constant drumming , a war cry.

--Come on...you bitch show yourself-- she whispers to herself eyes tightly shut.

There, the signal is faint, but strong enough for her to follow.

What Will she do when they meet face to face? Shes not sure yet.

Jerico feels the blowing of air of a snout, she turns around and there she was-- oro, you followed me all the way here?-- the dragon grunts unfolding her wings letting jeri Sit on the mount-- its hunting season oro,lets go

The creature takes flight, following the energy signal.

--And you let her go?!-- fuse asked slamming his hands agains the table.

Bloodhound shrugged-- I know better than to get in her way, fitzroy, besides theres nothing I,or any of Us could have said to stop her

Wraith perked up-- I can try and find her, if you want to go after her, the voices should help

Crypto shrugged-- or I could just check her phone tracker

The woman scowls--yeah that can help too

Loba puts a hand on fuses shoulder-- im equally concerned with jerico, but even then, shes a forced to be reckoned with, what Will you say to her when you see her

Fuse just sighed uncrossing his arms-- whatever it takes to Keep her out of this Mess, maggie is vicious and im afraid that jerico May not stand a chance

Meanwhile, jerico grew closer and closer to maggies hideout.

--Okay oro-- she said-- its time for a dive

The dragon nodded flying high up to the clouds,falling rapidly into the water.

With a splash they dive in, swiming under the hideout into a underwater cave.

Jeris adrenaline levels rise, with a firm grip in the reigns she signals oro to come up to the surface.

Oro peeks her head out breathing the humid air.

--there we go girl,stay here--jer climbs up the walls to the underground entrance.

The Doors Open infront of her, somehow they knew she was here.

Walking aimlessly she gets to where maggie was, the energy feels tingly in her fingertips.

The door opens up.

--wally?!--jer exclained-- the fuck youre doing here?

Maggie interrupts him-- well ya little loverboy here came to hand himself in,as long as you Keep breathin'

--What?!

--babe...let me explain-- fuse said walking towards her holding her hands-- shes vicious..you Wont stand a chance and I dont want anything happenin to ya

--But the answer isnt handing yourself in!--jeri added grabbing him by the collar.

Hes about to answer when maggie breaks both up-- say your goodbyes, hes coming with me

Jers body heats up, fists clenched.

Fuse tries to stop her but to no avail -- you think you can just come in here, blow up this place and take my love away?! Youre severly mistaken !

--nice catch wally-- maggie said slightly amused-- kitties got claws, now lissen here--

--No!--Jerico said -- you listen here you bitch, youre not taking him because of your petty revenge!, youre staying here with the rest of your crew, and ill crush you with my own bare hands!, you dont get to walk here like you own the place, like you own me or him!

The walls of the cave start to crack, dust starts to fall--this mountain bends to my will! Youll learn how it feels to be squashed under someones command...

A rock falls onto maggie and her lackeys, jeri walks towards her lifting her face up by the chin,violently-- see how it is down there?, right below us theres some gigantic eels hungry for food, I can feel their energy and they are starving...maybe youll do a nice dinner...or maybe youll give them a bad tummy ache,you rotten sack of shit

--Jerico enough!-- fuse pushes her away with an angry expression.

She huffs looking away.

He turns to maggie, and sighs-- it doesnt have to come to this...drop this and make peace, I cant Keep her down for much longer

The woman scowls and spits at his feet-- ya bloody traitor! Ill have your other arm!, you shouldnt have left salvó! Ill have your and your girlfriends head on a pyke!

Jeri growls making a bigger rock fall ontop of the one maggies under-- you shut up!

Walter sighs looking away-- then this is it...jerico we are leaving...

--what?!-- she says following fuse-- and let her live?!

He looks at her sternly, and as they exit the cave the door to it collapsed.

Back at the dropship fuse entered leaving jerico to cool off on the shore.

--And whats up with those two?--octane asked wraith, fuse and jerico havent talked to eachother in days.

--hes still mad at her, and jerico is too pridefull-- wraith answered in a hushed whisper.

Its midnight now, jerico tosses around her bed,unable to fall asleep.

She then feels a pair of strong arms around her pulling her closer to someones chest.

--Cant sleep babe?--fuse whispered against her ear.

Jeri turns around and hugs him tightly, he strokes her hair and she nodds.

Fuse sighs-- look babe what happened with maggie...I understand...youre mad,and I am tired of her shit...but going lonewolf was dangerous, I... just dont want to loose you--his voice breaks.

Jer sniffes hugging him tightly-- I dont want her to take you away from me wally!--She breaks down crying-- I cant loose you

He hugs her tightly crying with her--you wont,I promise you wont.

Their broken sobs are barely audible, he puts his head on the crook of her neck, sniffing trying to recompose himself--but...I think that ass kicking of yours May help her re-think things.. May I add..ya looked bloody hot while doing it,maybe I need to get ya mad more often

Jeri laughs kissing him-- oh shut up!

He kisses her again, both playfully fighting and wrestling around the bed, finally tiring themselves out falling to the bed.

-- im never leaving ya-- he whispered kissing her.

She nodds kissing back-- yout better Keep that promise up

Both chuckle.

--Night sweetheart

--night wally

[artificialqueens]

You're the Best Part (Heidi x Jaida) - Frankenvenus

a/n i wrote for this pairing cause of the way heidi and jaida talk about how close they got on the show which is so cute. i thought fuck it! let’s write a pregnancy au. the title is a lyric from best part by daniel caeser & h.e.r - 2 very talented black artists.

.

Jaida didn’t plan it. She had been with her deadbeat boyfriend for seven months before realising she didn’t swing his way. She ended up coming out to him over a very uncomfortable dinner date, and before she could even register what was going on, he had packed everything of his from her small Wisconsin home and left.

It was difficult at first. When your life revolves around this one person, it’s hard to find meaning when things are just over. Heidi helped - of course. Heidi from across the street - Jaida’s ride or die. There wasn’t a dull moment around the younger woman. Although the break up was rough and sudden, Heidi was by Jaida’s side to ease the pain.

Then, out of nowhere, Jaida fell sick. She would just be sitting, minding her own business when she would suddenly feel nauseated. She would have to rush to the bathroom and throw up, then she’d sit there for hours afterwards, head pounding painfully at the mere thought of food. It wasn’t until Heidi came over did Jaida move from her position. The young blonde rushed towards where she lay on the bathroom floor, placing a hand on her forehead.

“Jesus, girl. You are burning up. Let me get you some Tylenol or something I-” she yanked open Jaida’s medicine cabinet above her sink, rummaging through it for any kind of pain killer. “Are you food poisoned? It wasn’t my soup, was it? Fuck, I knew it smelt funny.”

Jaida groaned, wisps of her brown hair clinging to her forehead with sweat. She felt disgusting. She felt even worse having to tell Heidi that she hadn’t touched her soup. She just wasn’t feeling it. She had started to have strong cravings for peanut butter over the previous few days, so she had only really been eating peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for meals.

Upon telling Heidi this, the young blonde’s face dropped.

“Cravings?”

“Mhm.”

“Bitchhh,” the girl bit her lip and she looked at Jaida with a strange expression, “When was the last time you, you know… did it?”

“Did what?”

Heidi thought over how to say what she wanted to respectfully, without crossing the line. After dodging the big word with many synonyms to no avail, she just said it straight up. “When did you last get fucked?”

The older woman’s jaw went slack, suddenly feeling like passing out. She gripped the bottom of the sink to steady herself. She and her ex-boyfriend had had sex at least twice in the month prior to their break-up, and although she had been taking her birth control, he had consistently refused to wear a condom. Jaida remembered from her college reproductive biology class that 1 in 100 women would get pregnant on the pill annually. She really hoped she had food poisoning instead of being part of the unlucky 1%. She directed Heidi to the emergency pregnancy test in her cabinet, and the blonde promptly waited outside whilst Jaida followed the instructions printed on the box.

“Can you please talk to me whilst I wait? Distract me with your dumbass stories or somethin’,” Jaida joked, but her voice was shaky.

“Did I ever mention I’m a dom top?” Heidi began, and Jaida almost choked. “Yeah, I like tied a gal to the bed once. She said I was really good at it, but I wouldn’t know. She sounded super bored so I wanted to impress her. Her name was like… Dahlia, I think… and when I was fucking her I couldn’t stop thinking about the Black Dahlia and how when they found her body her mouth had been cut into a smile-”

“Preferably not about murder, Heidi. Chile…” Jaida tried to sound angry, but god it was hard. The fact that she was sitting here, possibly pregnant, after throwing up non-stop and Heidi could still elicit a laugh from her blew her mind.

Five minutes passed, Heidi continued to lie about being a dom-top, and then it was time to check the test.

“Heidi? Can you come in and look for me? I don’t think I can do it myself,” breathed Jaida, and her friend nodded without a word. The brunette clenched her fists subconsciously, looking at the floor whilst Heidi picked up the small stick.

“What do the two red lines mean again?” asked the blonde.

Fuck.

.

Jaida had made the decision not to tell her ex-boyfriend, the father of her soon-to-be child, that she was pregnant. She had heard from mutual friends that he had left the state and moved to Illinois, but quite frankly, she didn’t care.

Her mom had been overjoyed upon finding out, for she had always wanted to be a grandmother. She promised to support Jaida as a single mother throughout her pregnancy and her child’s life.

However, the most supportive person in the brunette’s life at that moment in time was Heidi. Heidi would always knock on the door and bring round a dish that matched Jaida’s daily cravings, she would buy her non-alcoholic wine so they could still drink and watch movies together, she would tend to Jaida when her mourning sickness got back and she would attend every single one of her friend’s check-ups. Jaida was starting to believe Heidi was her guardian angel - because she sure looked like it.

They sat together in the waiting room for Jaida’s second ultrasound. She was nearing her second trimester, and although it was small, there was a visible bump on her stomach. Heidi couldn’t take her hands off it. The blonde held a cheap magazine in one hand and kept her other hand on Jaida’s tummy, awaiting the feeling of a kick (although Jaida had told her it was likely too early for that.) Heidi mocked the trashy magazine headlines while they waited, causing the brunette to laugh so hard she almost cried.

“Girl, one day you’re gonna make this fuckin’ baby shoot out of me five months early cause I’ve been laughing too hard,” Jaida wheezed, gripping the side of the uncomfortable waiting room chair. People around them stared, but they didn’t pay attention.

Heidi gasped, “Oh my goodness Jaida, you can’t curse! What if your baby hears? You don’t want it to pop out of your coochie trash talking like its mommy…”

“Shut up bitch!”

Before they could disturb their surroundings anymore, a nurse entered and called them in. Jaida sat herself down on the chair and the nurse reclined it back slightly. Heidi sat on a small stool to the left of Jaida, watching Jaida with a shit-eating grin on her face. The sonographer, Dr Cox, entered the room, pulling gloves onto her slender hands.

“Well, I can see you have developed a small bump since your last check-up with me,” Dr cox smiled, applying lubricating jelly to Jaida’s stomach to prevent friction from the ultrasound transducer. The gel sent shivers through the brunette, but Heidi reached for her hand and warmed her up. “How are you feeling?” asked the sonographer.

“I’m feeling great. The sickness and nausea have kinda gone away. I’ve been having lots of cravings though,” Jaida sighed, “But it’s all good. Heidi over here got me a Build-a-Bear as a baby shower gift, but it’s more so for me than the baby.”

Dr Cox chuckled as Heidi flipped her hair like the proud best-friend she was.

“Isn’t it early for baby gifts? You don’t even know the gender yet!” Dr Cox said as she hovered the transducer over Jaida’s stomach.

Heidi cut in, “I think she’s plannin’ to raise the baby neutral. She’s gonna let it decide what it wants as it gets older. Until then, we are dressing it rainbow.”

Dr Cox couldn’t help but grin as she stared into the ultrasound, and Jaida felt her face heat up, hoping that the doctor wouldn’t notice. There was just something about the way Heidi spoke with such confidence and conviction that made Jaida’s heart swell in ways she didn’t know it could. What also caused the brunette’s head to spin was the way Heidi said we. They were going to raise this child together.

“Well, of course you can raise the baby gender-neutral. That’s a great idea,” Dr Cox chuckled, moving the transducer across, “But, I can tell you the sex. I can see it right here!”

Jaida’s eyes widened, “You can?”

“Mhm. Do you wanna know?”

“Uh, yes please. Duh.”

Dr Cox pointed at the screen as Jaida and Heidi watched curiously, “Thatis a little girl!”

Jaida tipped her head back in pure bliss. Although she hadn’t spoken it out loud, she had desperately wanted a girl.

“I am so happy. No loud ass boys in this house!” Heidi clapped with glee.

“You don’t even live with me,” Jaida laughed.

“I may as well!”

.

“Do you have a name for it?” Heidi asked whilst Jaida was biting into a hot pickle - the eight one she had eaten that day.

“Yeah, but it’s a surprise,” Jaida winked with a mouthful of food, “You’re just gonna have to wait and see.”

The blonde slammed her dainty hands on the table, “Bitch! Tell me.”

“Girl, I said surprise. You only have about a month to wait.”

Jaida was right. Her bump was ginormous, to the point that she couldn’t see her toes anymore, and it was clear that the baby was well on its way. Her back hurt constantly, her boobs had swollen their way out of most of her bras, and her hormones were going nuts. She was horny all the time, and incredibly touch starved. Despite having no love for her boyfriend, she missed the feeling of nuzzling her nose into his neck or having filthy words whispered in her ear whilst she was showering.

Every time the brunette looked at Heidi - plump lips, button nose and all - she tried to suppress the need to intertwine their fingers, rub her thigh or gently kiss her forehead. Jaida blamed the thoughts about her friend on the hormones, but deep down she knew there was more to it.

She still hadn’t grown tired of Heidi, even though they had spent practically every minute of the past eight months together. Heidi would still make her warm soup, brew her cups of tea and come over with bags of chips for Jaida, and she would never hesitate. The brunette felt like she owed her life to the younger woman.

It was Heidi’s idea to get the baby’s heartbeat tattooed. They had been given a picture by Dr Cox, and as a birthday gift for Jaida, Heidi had taken her to her friends Widow and Crystal’s tattoo parlour just out of town. The two girls were very well known for their minimalistic yet stylish tattoo designs, and they worked on dark skin flawlessly, unlike many other tattooists in the state. Heidi handed the picture to Widow and the latter was more than excited to execute the idea.

Jaida, being the overly cautious mother-to-be that she was, forced Crystal to thoroughly clean the needle right in front of her out of fear of hurting the child with infection. Crystal assured her that everything was fine and perfectly hygienic, but the brunette didn’t believe it until Heidi told her so. She finally relaxed as Widow pressed the needle against the soft skin of her upper arm.

“How does it look so far?” Jaida asked Heidi through gritted teeth.

“It’s gorgeous.”

“I wish my mom got tattoos done when she was pregnant with me,” Crystal chuckled, preparing the petroleum ointment that she would gently apply on Jaida’s skin once Widow had finished. “That’s so badass.”

“It was all Heidi’s idea,” Jaida smiled, nearly fainting when the apple’s of Heidi’s cheeks reddened slightly.

.

They were in line at Wendy’s when it happened. Jaida had been craving a spicy chicken sandwich, so Heidi drove her there without debate. The place was busy, so they were waiting for quite a while. Jaida earned a few stares, which was understandable considering she was heavily pregnant. And then she felt it.

“Oh my God, why does it feel like I’m fucking peeing?” Jaida gulped, her heartbeat quickening with distress. “Am I peeing? I didn’t need the bathroom? I feel like my bladder bopped…”

Heidi gasped and grabbed Jaida’s hand, “Holy fuck Jaida, I read about this. Your water just broke!”

It made sense. Jaida’s due date was set for the next week, but for some reason, the brunette hadn’t considered the child being anything but on time. She found it really cute that Heidi had done her research, though she hardly had time to register it because she was being rushed back to the car.

“What about my chicken sandwich?” she frowned as Heidi pressed her foot down on the pedal.

“Fuck your chicken sandwich! We gotta go!”

Thankfully, the hospital wasn’t far. Within ten minutes, they had reached the large building and were being attended to by multiple nurses.

“Oh fuck!” Jaida whimpered as she felt a heavy pressure press against her pelvis, not unlike a period cramp. The nurses told her not to worry, as she was just experiencing contractions, but she was worrying a lot.

Quicker than she could express her feelings, Heidi sensed them. She reached for Jaida’s shaky hand and gripped it, bringing her lips to it and kissing it gently multiple times.

The action was friendly, but it for sure eased Jaida’s pain.

“Heidi can you… can you call my mom?”

“Sure, hon.”

Hon. It seemed like such a domesticated pet name. Jaida felt like crying.

Ten minutes later, Jaida’s mom burst into the hospital room, looking glamorous as ever. Jaida was the spitting image of her, and Heidi found herself wondering if Jaida’s child would be the same.

“Are you okay, sweetie pie?” her mom asked, pushing past Heidi and grabbing her daughter’s hand comfortingly.

“I’m fine. Slightly uncomfortable, though.”

Jaida was still yet to go into labour, but the doctors and nurses had advised that she stay put at the hospital because it was likely that she would start soon. She was extremely nervous. Growing up, she had always found the prospect of birth disgusting and painful. Now that she was experiencing it - she was right. Her head was sticky with sweat, her lips were dry and the milk that had started coming in two days prior had caused her to feel constantly uncomfortable. To her surprise, Heidi had shown her how to use the breast pump, so now she had many cups of milk sitting in the fridge, waiting for baby Hall to arrive.

It wasn’t long before Jaida went into labour, and Heidi stayed by her the entire time (after having to argue with a nurse to try and convince her that she was practically family.) Their hands stayed connected through the entire process, and Heidi whispered Jaida comforting promises whilst the latter screamed in pain and agony.

Jaida didn’t cry often, but in the four hours that it took to deliver her baby, she must’ve cried her entire body mass. She cried harder after Heidi softly whispered in her ear, ‘We can do this together.’ She knew she couldn’t cope simply being Heidi’s best friend and next-door neighbour anymore. She wanted Heidi. Even more so, she wanted Heidi to be her child’s second parent. It was a huge thing to ask, and she told herself that she would never seriously ask it, but she knew that Heidi would make an incredible mom.

After hours of sobbing, the only cries that filled the room were the cries of Jaida’s beautiful little baby. The baby’s small head was already covered with little black curls upon delivery, and Jaida couldn’t help but stroke them softly whilst the newborn fell asleep in her arms. The baby’s nose was small and cute and Heidi had already gently booped it about fifteen times.

“It’s so tiny,” Jaida’s mom gaped.

“Look at its little hands,” Heidi added.

“Y’all wanna know what I decided to call it?” questioned Jaida, and both women nodded profusely, “I decided to call it Willow cause it’s kinda unisex and the willow tree on our street started growing right when I found out I was pregnant. It cannot be a coincidence.”

For the first time that day, Jaida watched as Heidi’s eyes became glassy. They quickly became filled with tears that spilt over after she said, “I love it.”

Jaida looked into Heidi’s eyes and saw something there that she hadn’t seen before. Both their eyes were dark and stared deeply into one another, further past what each of them saw.

“Momma, can you take Willow for a second? I need a moment with Heidi here,” the brunette asked and her mom nodded, carefully scooping the sleeping baby from her daughter’s arms. She stepped out of the room and into the hallway, leaving Jaida and Heidi there alone.

“Thank you for being here,” Jaida sniffled, reaching forward to take her friend’s soft hands, “I really don’t know how I would’ve coped without you. You have helped me more these past nine months than anyone has ever had. I owe you everything.”

“Girl, you’re gonna make me so emotional,” Heidi giggled through her tears, “I am so proud of you. You really said fuck this baby daddy I’m gonna birth this child all alone and raise it alone cause I’m the baddest bitch alive.”

The brunette bit her lip before placing her hand on the side of Heidi’s face nervously, causing the blonde’s lips to part subconsciously, “But I didn’t do it alone. I did it with you.”

Before either of them could say another word, Heidi pulled Jaida in by the back of her neck and tipped their lips up to meet one another in the softest, gentlest kiss either of them had ever experienced. It was nothing like the ones Jaida shared with her ex-boyfriend - those had no meanings - but this meant the world. Nine months of pent up emotions spilt out into the intimate embrace. Heidi’s lips explored Jaida’s hesitantly, like she was made of glass, but the brunette assured her not to be afraid by gently dragging her tongue across the blonde’s lower lip.

After another minute, they pulled away, breathless. They kept staring into one another’s eyes, looking for answers, until Jaida was the first to say it.

“I love you,” she muttered, “I have loved you this whole damn time.”

“I love you too,” Heidi wept, pressing her lips against Jaida’s flushed cheek briefly.

“Heidi I- I don’t know how to tell you this but I… I want you to be Willow’s mom, along with me. I want us to parent this kid together. I can’t do it alone.”

Heidi gasped, “Oh my lord I was waiting for you to ask that.”

“Chile… Are you serious?”

“Yes, bitch! I’ve always wanted to raise a child and teach it my ways and Willow… Willow is so beautiful. Just like their momma. Of course I wanna raise this baby with you.”

“I love you so, so much.”

.

11 months later

Jaida and Heidi had made an agreement that Jaida was to be called mom and Heidi was momma, to avoid any confusion, however, Willow was still yet to form a real word. Willow was a fantastic babbler and had perfected the art of incoherent sounds and blowing raspberries, but nothing that had escaped their lips was actually in the dictionary.

“Oh lord, what if Willow never speaks… What if they grow up mute?” Jaida panicked, her head in her hands against the kitchen counter.

“Calm down, baby,” Heidi sighed, placing her hand on the small of her girlfriend’s back, “If they’ve got even a fragment of your brain, I just know they’re gonna be a smartass.”

“Smartass!”

A voice echoed across the room. Heidi shoved Jaida gently for mocking her, but Jaida defended herself, promising that it wasn’t her who said it. They were confused for a second before the realisation dawned on them. They rushed towards Willow’s crib where the child sat, sucking on the floppy ear of a stuffed toy.

“What did you just call me, Willow Essence Anthonie-Hall?” Jaida squinted, leaning over the crib to watch her baby’s lips curl up into a smile.

“Smartass,” Willow grinned, causing Heidi nearly to pass out with laughter.

Jaida scooped Willow up and held them over her head, “You can’t say that! Heidi, tell Willow that they can’t say that!”

Heidi was wheezing too hard to respond, but after a minute of bellowing laughter, she managed to say, “Willow ain’t wrong!”

“Not only am I being bullied by my girlfriend, but also my almost 1-year-old kid,” she faux-gasped, “I’m leaving!” she joked, before bursting into laughter. Things couldn’t have been better.

[baekhyuq]

“Déjà vu.” | Baekhyun (m) Teacher!AU |Chapter 4:

“Déjà vu.” | Baekhyun (m) Teacher!AU |Chapter 4: Title: “Touch, warm, melt, lips.”

Genre: Smut, Fluff, Angst (maybe) Warnings: Smut/Language Word count: 4k (woah)

Summary: Your new obsession as of late has been masturbating sessions when your favorite cam boy is live-streaming . But too bad some nights you’ve got too much homework due from your Psychology teacher to watch your oh so hot cam boy.

deja vu masterlist

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Waking up the next day was a left you sore, your back popped along with a few other bones in need of stretching. Your back felt warm as Baekhyun’s arm itself draped over your body, his head leaning on the pillow by yours. The sun rays through the curtain fell over both of your entangled bodies, low music was filling the room. “Your body is so soft, I didn’t think you would feel so good climaxing on my fingers last night.” Baekhyun’s lips grazed your ear, your cheeks instantly turned crimson. “I-“ “And your thighs are so strong, I thought you would’ve crushed my head if I didn’t stop you.” “Baekhyun shut up!” You nudge his stomach and he lets out a grown, he tugs your arm to turn you around and you lazily oblige.

“Is there something you need?” You joke, pinching his adorable tummy fat, he grabs your wrist and glares at you.

“I need you.” He rolls on top of you and you’re instantly crushed by his weight.

“I need you to give me a massage.” He groans, his breath fanning your face. You push him back onto the bed and you sit up to scoff, swinging your legs over the edge of the bed.

“You need a massage? Yeah right, what about me? I’m going to need one after last n-“ You slap your hand over your mouth to physically stop the words coming out of your mouth. Realization was finally settling in. You just fucked the man that has the hugest crush on you and he’s just laying in your bed.

“What about you?” You could hear the smirk begin to form on his lips, Baekhyun’s hands rested on your hip. His delicate fingers tapping on your skin.

“N-nothing.” You stretch, popping some stiff bones here and there. You stand, wincing at the ache between your legs. You almost fall back onto the bed, but then you see the shit eating grin ok Baekhyun’s lips.

“Shut it, bitch boy.”

Baekhyun laughs at your response, almost choking.

“Bitch boy?” He repeats your words.

You hum a response and laugh while throwing on his shirt that covers enough of you to slip into the kitchen.

Baekhyun’s car was nice, really nice. He drove you both to class, with one hand on the wheel and the other resting on the arm rest. It was hot to say the least, his veins bulged from his forearm, and his expensive watch decorated his wrist. You couldn’t help but to gnaw on your lip in anticipation. What would your relationship be like after sex?

“Baekhyun?”

“Yes?”

“Do you have any kinks?” You asked as if it was a normal question.

Baekhyun accidentally breaks too hard and you both jerk forward.

“Y/n you can’t do this to me,” He says seriously, “My dick will get too hard at the thought of what I could to do you.” There’s a pause before he continues.

“I’ll let you discover my kinks. How about that?” His lips turn into a grin and you know you’re in for it the next time. There is a next time right?

“Deal, thanks for dropping me off at school Daddy. See you in Psych.” You joke as you both exit his sleek car. You hear the engine cut off as you walk on to campus. Same thing just another day.

Ever since that night with Baekhyun your thoughts have been wondering in Psychology. Professor Byun instructs everybody to work on their assignments in class and ask for help if needed. And your lips curl into a grin when you see that his hair is a mess. Likely from running his hands through it multiple times.

Your assignments were completed and you had almost nothing to do. Until an evil plan popped into your head.

You sat on the top row by yourself, the class was a smaller group, they all clustered toward the middle or front row. You took out your phone and looked around before going to your camera and sending pics of your silly faces to Baekhyun.

Baekhyun’s phone dings and he excuses himself before checking it, he grins and shakes his head. Baekhyun turns his phone over before crossing his hands behind his back, observing the class.

“Any questions class?” He asks.

You raise your hand and Baekhyun ascends the stairs to your row. “Professor Byun could you proofread this?” You play dumb to get his attention. He slides into the seat next to you and slides your laptop closer to his eyes. He squints, quite cutely in your opinion, to read over the few pages.

Baekhyun’s so immersed in your paper that his hand has moved from his lap to your thigh. You studied his focused eyes, his dark eyes captivated you instantly. You could remember how they stared at you while he ate you out last a few nights ago with his fingers buried in you.

You let out a small whine, after the sound emitted from you Baekhyun’s ears perked up.

“Y/n?” He whispers.

“Yes?” You respond flustered.

“Don’t do that again.” He gripped your thigh and you bit your lip lightly, nodding.

“Good girl.”

That was a first. You place your hand over his resting on your thigh and you play with his fingers.

“Your paper looks very neat, I really love your stance on this topic too. Keep up the good work, doll.” Baekhyun’s figure is retreating to his desk and he leans back on it crossing his arms over his chest.

You sigh dreamily, if only you could get another taste of him. You twirl your pen in your hand and bite on the end of it softly, you tilt your head curiously and get back to editing your paper.

You thank the woman and take your food heading toward Baekhyun’s apartment address. You felt giddy that he invited you to come over anytime. The streets were cold and the wind was blowing, it blew your hair in your face as you opened the door and it quickly shut behind you.

“Well, look what the cat dragged in.” That voice.

“Shut it, bitch boy. I just bought you dinner so thank me for going out in that weather.” You pouted as Baekhyun grabbed the bags from your hands kissing your cheek. “My poor baby, out in the cold like that. You’re probably freezing, let’s go to my apartment.” He took your hand in his and led you to the stair case in which you proceed to die because you’re out of shape.

“Will they ever fix that elevator?”

The warmth in his apartment made you melt into his sofa almost completely. Your legs were jelly and you were as comfortable as you could ever imagine being.

“What did you get?” Baekhyun asks as he starts to open the bag of food, inspecting the closed containers.

“It’s a bread bowl from Panera bread! Aren’t you exited?” You clap your hands giddily. Your favorite meal might just be soup, as plan as it sounds.

Baekhyun just admires your excitable actions and feels his heart swell with adoration. He reaches over the coffee table and grabs your chin pulling you toward him. He connects your plush lips with his soft ones. You sit in shock but fall in to the kiss easily, your lips melt together and Baekhyun chuckles before pulling away.

“I’m sorry, I couldn’t help myself, seeing you be so adorable makes me want to kiss you forever.” He confesses while clenching his heart as if he’s having a stroke.

You hit his arm playfully and unwrap your food carefully, smelling the delicious soup.

“So how’s work been?” He asks and you almost choke on a piece of carrot.

“I-its been great. I don’t ever recall telling you I worked anywhere.” You speak so fast you almost forget how to form a sentence.

“You didn’t, but I might have caught you in your uniform leaving the coffee shop. You looked so adorable.” Baekhyun smiles as he chews his food carefully blowing on his next spoonful.

You feel embarrassed, you’ve already have sex with the guy but never told him about your job. You worked as a barista on the side to help with college and rent, your parents insisted that they would pay for everything but it didn’t sit right with you.

“You always manage to make me feel embarrassed somehow huh?” You put your hair behind your ear.

Baekhyun laughs loudly, “It’s my specialty. If I don’t who else will?”

“I’m good at embarrassing myself.” You respond.

Baekhyun shakes his head standing up with both of your finished plates and discards them. “Hey where’s your pup?” Your eyes scanned for the short corgi.

“Mongryong!” Baekhyun called and you heard the sound of paws on the wood floor. You stood from the sofa to greet the small pup.

“Oh you’re so cute!” You rubbed Mongryong’s backside and he plopped onto his back waiting for his tummy to be scratched. You gently rubbed his furry belly and Baekhyun leaned over to pat his head before chuckling.

“Mongryong can get the ladies better than I can, this is embarrassing.” He joked, you let out a laugh and joked back about how charming Mongryong was compared to him.

“You don’t roll on your back and let the ladies rub your stomach do you?”

“Maybe that’s what i’m missing.” Baekhyun put his hand under his chin, thinking.

“Are we still on for the movies this thursday?” You ask while picking up the small pup who was very sleepy. You walked back to the sofa and sat by Baekhyun who had his eyes on you.

“Of course, any movie in mind?” He replies with a grin.

“50 shades of freed looked interesting.” You mumble while biting your lip. You wanted to watch a romance to restore your faith that the romance genre isn’t dead.

Baekhyun swallows thickly, you could see his demeanor shift slightly. He was nervous? The Byun Baekhyun?

“Are you okay with that-“

“Yeah of course! It sounds like a good movie haha.” He replies quickly and his eyes dart around the room.

“Oh cool, do you like romance movies?” You tease him further. He nods slowly, unconvincingly so.

“Baekhyun I know you don’t like romance, why are you so nervous?”

“Because keep thinking about fucking you in a cinema.” Baekhyun states.

“B-baekhyun-“

“I said you would discover my kinks didn’t I? Public sex sound like a kink to you?” He smirks all of a sudden, snatching any trace of smugness left in you.

You stutter over your words trying to act as if you’re unaffected. But your jumbled words say other wise. “I guess we will make one of your fantasies a reality.” You dared, you couldn’t let him have this win. You weren’t going to act like a little school girl. Ironically.

“Deal?”

“Deal.”

“See you tomorrow then bitch boy.”

The cinema was dimmed and you both were sat in the back where it’s the darkest, especially when the movie starts. Baekhyun dressed in a grey hoodie and black sweats. He looked extremely comfortable. You opted to wear a t shirt dress and bring a winter jacket for the cold.

The cinema was filled with middle aged women and few teenagers. The lights went out in the room completely and the movie started.

About 15 minutes into the movie Baekhyun leaned his head into your shoulder, his arm falling into your lap. He acted like a puppy at times and it was absolutely adorable at times. The movie continued with sex scenes here and there, and you honestly weren’t affected by them.

But a certain somebody was.

Baekhyun was shifting in his seat, from leaning on your shoulder to sitting with his legs crossed. You knew you had to do something to settle this irritated boy down and there was only one way.

You reached over in his lap and grabbed his hand bringing it to your lap again. You brought his hand under your dress and he instantly rubbed you through your panties. Baekhyun leaned his head on his other hand, eyes on the silver screen. You held his wrist as he slid past your panties to your heat.

You heard him snicker as he inserted two fingers and you almost doubled over from the sensation. You leaned into his hand and bit his shoulder as he curled his long delicate fingers. You could feel how cold they were and you didn’t say one word, you leaned your head onto Baekhyun’s shoulder as he fingered you under your dress. His strokes were long and drawn out, making you choke on your silent moans you let out into his ear. Baekhyun looked around before turning his head to you and kissed you deeply.

You responded quickly latching onto him, you wanted him. All of him.

You slid your hand into Baekhyun’s lap and grabbed his dick through his sweats. Surprisingly not wearing any underwear. You slid your hand in his sweats and slowly jerked him off. The slick noises were kept to a minimum as you both pleasured one another with your talented hands. Nothing else mattered to either of you but trying to get the other one off. Baekhyun bit down your neck leaving small love bites in his path.

You felt your hand covered in Baekhyun’s sticky precum and couldn’t believe you were doing this. If only your parents knew what the hell you were doing out here.

That familiar ball of fire built up into a climax that shot through you and you ever so quietly moaned into Baekhyun’s shoulder. He couldn’t contain himself and he kept fingering you even after your climax ripped through you. You grabbed his wrist and felt too weak to even push his hand away so you let the second volcano explode as the first one had did. All over Byun Baekhyun’s fingers

“Fuck, you’ll never know how much I love feeling you around my fingers.” He said as he kissed your temple in adoration. You turned your head toward him almost exhausted. His two fingers still deep within you.

“Out, please.” You whispered and wiped off your own hand from Baekhyun’s release.

Baekhyun obliged but not before pulling your underwear back and letting it smack your skin in return. You whine and he snickers in response, wrapping his arm around your torso bringing you closer to his body heat you desperately wanted.

The rest of the movie was a blur, Baekhyun slept through the rest as you contemplated doing the same.

You both ended up sleeping till you heard clapping and woke up to see the movie ended.

Baekhyun stretches his long arms and stands up, offering you a hand. You take it and he guides you both out the cinema.

You yawned in the car on the way to yours. Class was cancelled for tomorrow so you could sleep as much as you wanted and nobody could tell you no. Except Byun Baekhyun of course.

“Play video games with me! I finally don’t have any papers to grade!” He whined as he held your pink controller in his hands adorably so.

“I just want to sleep, the movie made me tired.” You cried.

Baekhyun scoffed, “Are you sure it was the movie?”

You threw a pillow at him but he dodged it. Kora came up by your leg and rubbed on you. “Hello my widdle baby do you want to come with mommy she’s going to sleep.”

“I want to come with mommy.” Baekhyun imitates my baby talk and I pretend to gag at the teasing, plopping down onto the sofa.

“Give me a stupid controller i’ll beat your ass at this game then sleep.” I grumbled.

“You think you’re going to beat me?” He retorted with a look of determination.

“Yeah then i’ll sleep afterward to disrespect you even further.” You laugh loudly before pressing start.

Embarrassingly enough you got your ass handed to you by Baekhyun and lost all of the rounds. You didn’t win, not once. Baekhyun looked at you with an expecting look. He knew. You knew.

“You owe me now. I won.” You groaned at his statement.

“Owe you what?”

“I want to know some of your kinks.” He bluntly stated. You were almost taken aback at his statement but this was Baekhyun you were speaking with. Almost everything he said was shocking.

“My kinks? I like….I don’t know, just having sex is enough for me?” You gagged at your own words cringing on the inside.

Baekhyun’s lips curled into a mischievous grin, something running through his mind before deciding to join you on the couch.

“You’re saying you don’t have any kinks Y/n?” He ran a finger over your exposed thigh. Your thigh became covered in goosebumps and you shuddered.

“No I just, I guess i’ve never experimented exactly.” You said truthfully. Having one boyfriend in the 12th grade gave you insight to absolutely nothing. What a waste of time. Baekhyun’s eyes were curious, wanting to hear more about how seemingly innocent you actually were.

“I want to ask you a question.” He tilted his head to the side, his eyes slanted in a sensual way. You hum in response, allowing him to continue.

“Are you into voyeurism?” His hand wrapped around your thigh, giving it a light squeeze to emphasize his question. You couldn’t muster up a verbal response so you merely nodded, embarrassed.

“This seems all too embarrassing for you to even talk about and it’s absolutely adorable watching you squirm.” Baekhyun whispered by your ear.

“I’d like to try some form of voyeurism on you, would you allow me to?” His eyes were glazed with lust and you should’ve known better than to just give in to him without thinking, but you did. And oh boy, you trapped yourself between a camera and a hard place.

The camera was facing you as you were bent over on Baekhyun’s bed, blindfolded. Your anxiety was through the roof, there is no doubt that the camera pointing on you was for his cam boy account. Putting two and two together with Baekhyun doesn’t seem so hard. He’s a little predictable at times, but this was out of your mind. You would’ve never guessed you would end up on your hot cam boy’s “show.”

Baekhyun explained that he did this before he started teaching and that he could used the extra cash sometimes. He told you the rules before the livestream started, his username was B-Bear and that you couldn’t call him by his real name. You asked about the blindfold and he responded with it being to protect your identity.

Baekhyun started the live with his normal introduction, but with the mention of him not being alone this time. You thought about how you could be at home, with your legs spread, watching him jerk off to the thought of you.

You could only imagine how the chat in the live must look.

Your legs ached, holding your own body up seemed to be too much of a task. Baekhyun took notice in your tiredness and came to the rescue by placing you on your back. Baekhyun’s arms were cold wrapped around you but his hands were even colder.

“You’re shivering?” Baekhyun noted, “Your nipples are hard as well. Are you excited?”

You turned your head toward his voice and nodded with your hands over your chest, whining at his cold hands coming to fondle your breasts. You gasped at the contact and Baekhyun chuckled.

“You’re so sensitive, Bunny.”

You giggled at the nickname and let your senses zone in on your surroundings. Baekhyun kissed your collarbones, pushing back your hair to expose the right side of your neck. He placed another kiss and began to rub your clit.

You arched your back slightly wanting more of his delicate fingers already.

“Your fingers are so cold.” You mumbled while your stomach turned at the odd feeling. Baekhyun kissed the side of your mouth in response.

“You’ll warm them up in your oven wont you?”

You smacked his arm and he let out a throaty chuckle, kissing your mouth this time. Your lips melted together like chocolate on a hot summer day. You both felt the sexual tension that built up from that night you played video games. You could only imagine how Baekhyun got through the week with the pent up frustration.

Your hands traveled down Baekhyun’s chest sliding down on his abdomen. You felt his hard muscles and figured he must’ve been working out lately. He grunted at your nails scraping against his torso and grabbed your wrist and pinned them above you.

“Keep your hands to yourself, Bunny.” You could hear the smirk form on his lips as he spoke. You anticipated each moment he moved, or made a sound.

His fingers traveled further down and slid into you slowly. Baekhyun moved to your heat and placed a careful kiss on your thigh. “I love your skin, how is it so soft.” He confesses in a state of adoration, worshipping you as the goddess he saw you as.

Baekhyun’s fingers curl unexpectedly and you moaned loudly for the first time. Baekhyun’s ears perk up and he does it again, and again, until your a moaning mess and he’s satisfied. He leans down to your heat and licks a strip up your clit, pushing your wandering hands back onto the mattress. He denies you of one sensation and wants you to enhance another one. Touch.

How many times did he make you cum just by his fingers alone? Twice, and with his tongue? Thrice. You were so spent by the end of the second climax that you were breathing heavily and covered in a layer of sweat. Your brows were scrunched together, hands were gripping the sheets and you were absolutely spent. Baekhyun on the other hand was as ready as he could be. He planned to pleasure you as much as you could take or allow him to.

Baekhyun turned your body over and rubbed your aching back with careful hands. He kissed your shoulder and asked if you were ready. You nodded agreeing to whatever he was to do next.

Surprising you with his length once again, he slid into you so easily so effortlessly as if he was made to be there.

You let out a light moan, folding your arms under your head as a prop.

“Ah..”

Moans were emitted from both of you and the room smelled of sex and was slightly humid. Your ass jiggled with every thrust provided by Baekhyun’s skilled hips. You thought that you couldn’t experience anymore pleasure but you were wrong. Being extremely tired and having lazy sex made you feel as if you had no care in the world, as if you were being taken care of.

Baekhyun bites on your shoulder and he can feel himself close to coming undone, the feeling of your ass pressing back onto his crotch makes him want to stay here forever. But he knows you’ve been worn out and deserve to sleep.

Baekhyun climaxes onto your back after a few thrusts and you encourage him by whispering how good he made you feel, or how exhausted he made you. He feels his soul leave his body as he cums while you praise him.

After the sex is done, after the livestream has ended. You feel like you owe it to Baekhyun to tell him the truth. To tell him you know.

But there’s something about his adorable sleeping figure that just can’t bring you to do it.

Maybe somethings are better left unknown. You surely won’t let this ruin your relationship you both have grown together. This is your fair shot at true love, would it hurt to keep a little embarrassing secret? Would Baekhyun be so embarrassed he ignores you all together?

“Baekhyun-I-“ You heard his soft snores beside you and you sigh, the poor man is fast asleep in your arms. His little nose buried right between your breasts, like a child seeking comfort. You decided you would bother him later about it. But for now you wanted one thing, and that was to sleep with your “man” in your arms.

taglist: @deliciouslydisturbed365 @92byunie @thenamethatisgiven

[darkheartvamp]

At Peace with the Silence

~Hello lovely’s Tis me again. I know. So i don’t know where i am gonna go with this fan fiction but i know i wanna write it. So come along for the ride. Its gonna be a long one. I plan to post this maybe once every week or so. See how its doing. I want you guys in on the experience too. Tell me what you think. Give me ideas on how you think its gonna go down. I am all ears for this. I would really love and appreciate your comments and answers. Please don’t hesitate to ask for anything i do write one shots and preferences. Welp let us move along. ~

       The creaky door to the small apartment gave way as i  trudge into the darkness wearily scanning before turning on the dim lights. Illuminating the soft leather couch and living room into view. Tossing the keys i had in hand into the cauldron placed onto the old scuffed table beside the door. Sighing softly into the silence i make my way slowly to the kitchen kicking off my shoes against the bar stool. Glancing around the dim kitchen bar i flick the light on. Opening the refrigerator door i scan the bare shelves looking for some semblance of food. 

       “ Guess it is a fast food night” Sighing to myself, shutting the door to the fridge i trudge lazily into the bedroom to change out of work clothes. Throwing on some sweats and a giant comfy sweater. Standing at the vintage mirror i bought at the flee market down the road. I take in my tired appearance My long brown hair cascading down past my shoulders. My big brown eyes and smallish button nose stand out against my semi full lips that are drawn in a line of annoyance. 

     “ This sweater make me look fatter” I huff, puffing out my round chubby cheeks. My body was a not what society deemed worthy or model type. I was plus size. fat in other terms. I had big boobs that struggled to find bra’s in the right size. My hips where huge and my thighs could barely hold in jeans. My tummy was very round and my butt was probably my favorite part of my body. Like Terry from Brooklyn nine nine once said “ Terry got butt for days”.  

     “ Welp, faster i go the faster i can come home and watch my movies.” Grabbing my wallet and phone and keys. I head out the door locking it behind me. Placing the earphones into my ears. The song Fall apart by Post Malone blast through my speakers. Making my way down the stairs out to the street watching as the sun fades into purple and red hues. 

     The streets are slowly dwindling of people that had gotten off work. Hearing the blaring honks from the cars passing by in anger at people crossing in the middle of the street. Ignoring the world around me I head towards the new sushi bar that opened not even a month ago. Stepping into the establishment I head towards the bar to make my order. Glancing at the menu for a few minutes, I hear the song Bullet Proof Love by Pierce the Veil pull me from the menu. 

“ Hey bestie! What’s up? Everything ok? “ chuckling into the phone. Then with rapid succession i hear a bang a few cuss words before i hear the familiar voice. 

“ Hey sammy! We are ok! nothing much we let ourselves into your apartment! you weren’t answering. Where are you?’ Signing to myself. Of course these two would break into my apartment. 

“ Yea Miranda, I am alright. I’m down the street at the sushi place. You guys want anything?’ 

“ Yea we would love sushi! Want me to set up Captain America civil war? “ chuckling at her announcement of our favorite movie lately to watch together. 

“You betcha, Call dibs on Bucky!” i hear in the distance 

 “ BItch!!!!!!!!! YOU ALWAYS GET BUCKY! LET ME HAVE DIBS!” 

“ Girl you prefer Captain Sparkles over Bucky anyway!” I say with such sarcasm dripping from my tone it could coat a piece of toast like butter. 

“ Laddies! laddies! laddies! how bout we watch it without claiming men today. “ I hear Miranda tell us. Listening to the grumbles come from Emily. I sigh letting this one slide. 

“Fine! mooom i promise not to call dibs on the men this time.” Heaaring the huff and a good from the end of her side. I smile before saying good by and ordering our food for the evening. Taking our food and heading straight back to the apartment. I am bombarded at the door by Emily screeching at the top of her lungs 

“ YOU TOOK SO LONG I AM FAMISHED” rolling my eyes at her childishness. I push past her into my now cluttered apartment of snacks and drinks galore. 

“ I had to order alot of sushi for us ladies. Lord knows my fat ass can eat.” I speak teasingly back at her. Setting down the food on the bar i begin pulling out everyone’s boxes of sushi. Hearing the patriotic theme song of the movie playing in the background. I make my way over handing off the food to each girl. 

“ Alright ladies lets get movie night underway” plopping down on my giant couch. Between commentary from us on the movie, To in between bits of informing each other about are days since we last hung out. We forget time passing us by. Between popcorn fights and the cheesecake that miraculously looks to fluffy to be a cheesecake. We settle down into the movie till i hear a sigh come from Miranda.  

“ I wish we could be in this movie” I look over at her as she is staring wistfully at the screen Noticing the fight sequence happening between Bucky and the armed men. 

“ I wish we where in their world. Fuck the movie” Snickering at Emily’s declaration. 

“ Yea i second that motion. What i would do to be there beside Cap, Sam, and Bucky. Hell! i would even take Loki or Thor man!” I exclaim at the two ladies who are sipping on the champagne that was mysteriously taken from my wine rack. 

Out of know where I hear a pounding in my ears and I feel like my stomach is being thrown inside out. Gasping and clutching onto the leather beneath me. I feel a squeezing feeling. I hear distantly Emily and Miranda shout out. But its so muffled i can’t quite make out the words. I shut my eyes at the pain gasping at the feeling of being weightless. I feel the air swoosh beside me as i open my eyes to see the sky. The scream i make can only be described as pure terror as i crash into the grown. The world swirl’s into nothingness as i fight to breathe and to stay awake. 

[90sgrungewriter]

6. Untitled - Eddie Vedder

Status: Unedited

Needless to say, most of the day was spent creating wacky works of art with Eddie. You's started with big scraps of paper and combined your minds together, and created some pretty wicked paintings. You smoked 2 joints by this time, so you both were pretty high, but as the time passed, you were starting to burn out.

"Wanna take a break? I'll order us some take-out." You stood up and made your way over to your kitchen and opened the drawer where all your takeout flyers were.

"Where from?" The voice cam from almost directly behind you. It startled you so you whipped around and noticed he was standing just a few feet away from you, hands in his pocket.

"Sorry, didn't think you scared that easy." He winked. You rolled your eyes.

"Well, now you know."

He met you at the island in the center of your kitchen and you looked to decide together where you would order from.

"Okay wait. So what are we thinking? Pizza, Greek, Chinese...?" you turned your head to the side to look at him. 

"Mm, Chinese food sounds pretty good to me, right now." He said as he rested a hand on his slim tummy. You couldn't help but agree. It really did.

"Totally agree. What about Chen's Village? They have the best chicken chow mein." You gave him the brochure for the restaurant, and he took a few seconds to look it over, before approving.

"Alright, I'll have the fried tofu with mixed vegetables. You want me to call?" He offers. You nodded meekly.

"Please? I hate talking on the phone. This weird phobia of mine, I guess."

"Its ok, I'll call." He smiled. You pointed him to the phone that lay on the table and he quickly made the call. While he was doing so, you sneaked away to your room to grab your wallet from your purse. He payed for breakfast, so you thought it only to be fair if you were to pay for dinner. At the same time, you grabbed your fluffy blanket at the same time.

When you came back, you decided to clean up the living room a little. A few minutes later he came to help. After that was done, you tossed him the TV remote, and he plopped down on your couch and turned it on.

You were about to sit down too when you heard the doorbell. Before Eddie could even stand up you rushed to the door. The delivery person was a nice older lady, so you made sure to tip her a few extra bucks. She thanked you kindly, and you grabbed the food and shut the door. You turned to Eddie giving you a slight glare, arms crossed.

"You had this planned, didn't you?"

"Maybe." You winked.

"Couldn't you just let me be a nice guy and pay for you?" He said in a voice you knew he was picking on you.

"Oh shut up. You did pay for breakfast this morning, so can't you just let me be a nice girl and pay for you this time around?"

"Goddamn double standards." He cursed. You gently punched his arm with your free hand, and he swiped the food right out of your grasp.

"Hah!  Its all mine now. " You chased him around your tiny apartment, the both of you laughing like crazy.

Finally catching up to him, you wrapped your arms around his torso, lifting his taller frame right off the ground.

"Hahaha, oh my god!" Eddie shouted laughing hysterically. 

You set him down on the couch, ripping the big box of food from his hands this time.

"I cant believe you just picked me up. You're so tiny! Where do you hide all your muscles?" He stood up, and poked at your arms with his soft hands. You giggled as he continued to do so and followed you to the kitchen.  

"I actually used to hit the gym a lot in whenever I was in high school. I went through this intense phase of getting fit, I used to always get picked on about my weight,and I never had a boyfriend so I always felt insecure about it. Anyway, I hit the gym and hit it hard. Got in pretty good shape, now I can kick ass, I guess." There was a lot missing to that story, but you didn't feel like venturing too far into it. Eddie nodded his head.

"But you're so tiny." He lifted your arm.

"Yeah, its been at least a year since I've been. Just caught up with life. Between work and school, and trying to keep somewhat of a social life...the gym just isn't much of an option for me right now." You smiled, taking out plates for your food. Once everything was set, Eddie grabbed both of your plates and brought them to the living room and set them down on the coffee table. He grabbed the remote flipping through the channels.

"Want something to drink Ed? Water, beer, a coke?"

"Maybe just some water please." He turned and shot you a toothy smile. While you filled the glasses with ice, you thought about the days events. You spent the whole day with Eddie today, and really enjoyed it. You hoped he wasn't just staying because he thought it would be rude if he left. But things seemed to be going right for you, for once. So, this one time, you convinced yourself that it wasn't true. You told yourself Eddie finds a good friend in you, and he enjoyed your company, as you did his. You poured cold water into the glasses and made your way to the living room, passing one to Eddie.

"Thank you." He looked at you and took a large gulp.

"You're welcome. Find anything interesting?" You sat down and wrapped your fuzzy blanket around the lower half of your body. Your legs were folded under your but and your body leaned toward the arm of the couch to your left. Eddie laughed.

"Comfy?"

"I am now." You laughed. As you were about to reach to grab your plate on the coffee table, Eddie beat you to it and set it gently down in your lap. You smiled up at him, he was so nice.

“Such a gentleman." He nodded, digging into his own plate of food.

“I try to be.” 

Your eyes shifted to the TV to see you were watching some documentary about bugs. What a guy.

"I can change it if this grosses you out. There wasn't much else on." He laughed, mouthful of food.

"Its fine, I know. My channels suck. Thats why I own so many movies." You pointed to the corner where all your DVD's were stocked messily on a shelf. He nodded.

"Maybe we should watch one of those, then." He looked at you.

"Sure, you can check them out. Maybe eat first though, so your food doesn't get cold."

"Way ahead of ya." He winked again. Fuck off. Now he was going to start winking at you too? Like his cheekbones weren't enough. Goddamnit.

You cleared your throat and continued to eat.

"Thanks for spending the day with me Ed." You spoke, after a few moments of silence. Your food was delicious, and judging by the look on his face you could tell he felt the same way.

"Anytime."

"Oh, don't say that. I get pretty lonely quite often." You teased.

"Yeah, well me too.." He said softly, a small smile upon his lips. You observed him out of the corner of your eye, something you had been doing quite a lot, but couldn't help yourself. He was such an interesting guy.

"What do you mean by that?" You questioned curiously. He stayed quiet for a few moments, probably trying to word something properly in his mind.

"I don't know..I haven't every really spoken about my feelings to anyone. Or anything to anyone for that matter. Sometimes, barely even Beth." Ah, her. Almost forgot about her for a while. Almost. You scolded yourself mentally. Don't be such a bitch, Dani. The poor guy might spill something important to you, and all you can think about is your jealousy over his ex girlfriend? You were disappointed in yourself. He continued to speak.

"Talking about it to someone, well, you...just makes things seem more real. Maybe, some things I've been trying not to think about for a long time." He seemed very conflicted. You gently placed your hand on his shoulder, hoping to comfort him in a subtle way.

"Beth...She uh-well...I always made it seem like we had the perfect relationship. Like she was perfect, and if anything, she could do better than me." He finished up his plate of food, and set it gently on the table in front of him. You removed your hand to place your own plate, which still had some food left, but you didn't want to be rude while he was talking, down on the table also. You re-adjusted your position so that you were now facing him, legs crossed, blanket still wrapped around your legs. You suddenly remembered when you told him he could talk to you if need be, but you didn't actually think he would. But here he is, ready to probably tell you some serious shit. You suddenly grew nervous. You were happy he had chose to confide in you, but you were most definitely not the greatest when it came your turn to talk. You knew that maybe he wasn't expecting you to say anything at all, because that the way he was. Maybe he didn't chose you at all, maybe he just felt bad about the Stone situation. He knew you felt embarassed about it all, and maybe he wanted to make it more bearable for you by spilling his guts or something. Your rambling mind was interrupted by his sweet voice.

"I used to be so sure about us. The way she felt for me, our future. I thought it was set in stone. Seven years is a long time." You stayed quiet. The only sounds were the noises coming from the TV, but the volume wasn't very loud to begin with. He continued to talk.

"But then this happened. So abruptly, all these changes that were to take place in my life. I mean, I left San Diego, my home, to come here. That was a big enough change, and now the person I spent the last seven years waking up to every morning, I'll never see again." He looked down as he spoke, playing with the hem of his flannel. "My life took a complete turn and now, I feel like I don't know anything. What to do, how to feel, how to move forward. I was going to propose to her." That shocked you. Your eyes widened a little, but you still said nothing. There was nothing you could say, really.

"The first day I came here, after our first jam session, I went looking all around for jewelry stores to find here the perfect ring. Ironically, I didn't see any that I thought she'd like. I guess that was a good thing." He tried to joke lightly, but you didn't really laugh. It wouldn't have really been appropriate.

"I loved her, and I thought she loved me. But thinking about it these past couple of days...deep down, I knew. I always knew." He shook his head. Knew what?

"Knew what?" You repeated outside of your mind this time, quietly, curiously.

"There was always something missing. A piece, always a sense of emptiness in our relationship." You were still slightly confused. 

"Her love. It was never there. Maybe at first, but as time went by... I think she just got used of me being there. I was a part of her life she was just used to having around." You nodded, finally understanding. Your heart hurt for him. You could never imagine someone in there right minds doing that to someone like Eddie. He deserved better.

"I at least thought she cared about me though. But looking back on it... she surely didn't. You don't fuck over the ones you care about." Ain't that the truth.

"I'm a bit scared. I don't know where I stand, with almost anything. The guys seem to like me, but what if I do something stupid and mess up? If that happens, I go back to San Diego to start back at zero again. No girlfriend, no band, no job. Nothing." He leaned his back against the back of the couch. Your eyes followed his all the way there, filled with worry for him. You decided it was time to say something.

"First things first, the guys fucking love you, man. That should not be a worry in your little head, so flush that one away. Okay? If anything, they're probably scared to lose you. After Andy... things are looking up for them right now and I'm sure they don't want their hard work to go down the drain." You leaned over to get a bit closer to him, but not too close. "Secondly, Ed. I'm speaking as a true friend to you right now, whatever happened with Beth is not the end of anything. I mean, it is the end of a relationship, but it’s also a new beginning." He turned his head, eyes bore into yours, he rose a brow in question.

"Well for one, all those feelings of worry, angst and emptiness you felt when you were with her, thats all over with. You won't have that weighing you down anymore." You hoped you worded that properly. "It seems to me, this all happened for the best, for you. It may not seem like it right now, but maybe in a few months you'll be happier than you ever have been. You never know. Life works in some mysterious ways Eddie, thats one thing I can tell you for sure." You smiled lightly over at him. He stayed quiet for a few moments, eyes locked to yours. You shifted uncomfortably, had you said something wrong? You hoped not.

"I think... I think you're right." He spoke, sitting up straighter, tearing his eyes away from your own. Oh thank god. You smiled. "A new beginning. Huh. Never thought of it like that..."He drifted.

You patted his back gently. "Atta boy!" You joked. He laughed and nudged your shoulder.

"Thanks, Dani. Much better than the advice you gave me the other night." He teased. Your jaw dropped and you punched his shoulder this time around.

"Fuck you, I tried!" You couldn't help but laugh, and so did he. Quite some time had passed, and you two went on talking. It nearing 9:00, but you weren't tired yet. After all, you did end up sleeping in quite a bit this morning. You knew you couldn't miss your class tomorrow though. You stood up, the blanket falling to the floor, as you picked the plates up of your coffee table and brought them to the kitchen. You set them in the sink for now, you didn't really feel like doing dishes at this moment.

"Thanks for dinner and the eventful day. I had fun painting with you...oh and letting me rant, thanks for that." He stated awkwardly, scratching the back of his neck.

"Anytime, Ed." You smiled warmly.

"I should get going though. I gotta shower, I'm starting to stink."

"Is that what I've been smelling?" You scrunched your nose teasingly and the two of you laughed. You followed him to your door.

"Thank you for spening the day with me, Eddie. And for breakfast this morning. Say hello to my boys for me, alright?" You opened your door for him as he finished lacing up his white boots.

He straightened out and pulled you into a quick, and awkward hug. Safe to say, it didn't last long. He waved goodbye and promised he would say hi to the guys. When he was halfway down the hall of your building he shouted at you "don't forget our gig friday!"

"Wouldn't dream of it, Vedder." You waved back at him this time, a toothy grin plastered on your face, as you watched him disappear down the stairs.

[tessatechaitea]

Odyssey of the Amazons #2

Ostensibly, this is a book about building Amazon diversity but my male gaze suspects a different agenda.

So a troll will eat anything that screams when devoured alive. How does it know the meal will scream when devoured alive until it tries devouring it alive? If the presumed meal doesn't scream, does the troll spit it out?

• I wouldn't mind so much if the caption used the preposition "or" instead of "and". But now I imagine a troll sees something breathing and is all, "Might be food!" Then it stabs it and sees that it bleeds and its stomach rumbles and it thinks, "Oh yeah! Belly here it comes!" Then it begins eating the still alive thing which doesn't scream so the troll spits it out in disappointment, holds its belly in both hands as it glances down at it, and says, "Sorry, tummy. Maybe the next thing will breathe, bleed, and scream!"

Well yeah! They can't eat without the screams. And if they don't eat, they don't live!

• The trolls are illiterate heathens. You can tell because they end their questions with two question marks. Only one acceptable sentence ending double punctuation mark exists and that's the question mark/exclamation point combo. Some idiot invented the interrobang which is a single punctuation mark that combines the two but it looks even more idiotic than using two pieces of punctuation at the end of a sentence (which almost always looks fairly idiotic (because it is (unless there are closing parentheses before the period (or quotes (and probably a whole bunch of other special cases))))).

Wait. You roast your food? What about the eating things alive while they scream thing?!

• The troll proceeds to smash Hessia in the face and say, "On your knees like the female dog you are." Stupid troll. Dogs never sit on their knees! It's pretty much impossible! Also, Mr. Troll, you're being really sexually aggressive with your violence. Maybe tone down the allusions to forced oral sex while beating up women. • During the big fight scene, the Narrator says, "They will not go gently into the night." Being that that's a riff on Dylan Thomas's poem, it made me think of the poem which made me angry. If I were dying and somebody was all, "Fight! Fight against the dying of the light!" I'd be all, "Fuck you! I'm dying here! Don't make this all about you, you narcissist!" Then I'd probably die and those would be my last words and anybody who heard them would think, "Gor, he were a grouchy one, weren't he?" • The Amazons begin getting their numbers punched, and in their own comic book even! Luckily, there are male warriors nearby to save their lives. Unluckily, the Narrator won't shut up about it.

What do Vikings know about summer pools?! Does summer even exist in the Fjordic countries?

• I recently made a Norse Blood Bowl team called the Fjordic Bee-Orcs. They're going to rule the Norse League. • This bit where some other warriors rush in to save the weary warriors being killed by trolls doesn't make this story any less reminiscent of Elfquest. At least the vikings didn't ride in on elk. • The Amazons and Vikings defeat the trolls and head back to Viking Village, a community for people who like community and flying into random, blood-soaked rages. • The next day, Hessia gets to know one of the vikings. She makes a passing mention of Morpheus and he's all, "Who?" Then he mentions Thor and describes him as "the storm god himself" and Hessia is all, "Who?" And the viking is all, "Bitch, weren't you listening?!" • The Vikings and Amazons join up to defeat the Jotuns because the Amazons need to save their sisters and the Vikings need an exciting way to enter Valhalla. • Meanwhile in Jotunheim, the young Amazons who were taken find out that they will be the mothers to a new race of half-Amazon, half-Giant babies. Why would they consent to tha...oh. I think the number of copies of next issue being sold next month just fell substantially. • The Amazons and Vikings begin their journey to Jotunheim over discussions of gender as seen through the prism of differing cultures. The Amazons are all, "You Vikings don't respect women!" And the Vikings are all, "We do too! At least we don't rape the fuck out of them like the giants!" And the Amazons are all, "Oh shit! Can we get this raiding party moving any faster?"

How nice of him! I hope it's a magic sword!

• On the way to Jotunheim, Hessia is bitten by a werewolf and they meet a bunch of Odin's Valkyries on flying boars and horses. That should shut these Vikings up about whether or not women were meant for battle. Fucking dicks. The Ranking! No change! I haven't changed my position on not being interested in tales of DC's Amazons.

[artificialqueens]

Teacher, Teacher (Biadore) - Ch. 1 - Red2

A/N- Hey guys, Red again, just a quick note, PLEASE send prompts of Drag queens you would like an appearance. ANY feedback is good! I would appreciate feedback! Thank you so much again

T/W- Swearing

Tap, tap, tap.

Adore bounced her pen against the jotters she held close to her chest. She leaned against the lockers. Music first, then Fashion. Courtney was too busy texting to tell how the butterflies danced in Adores tummy.

Adore felt like blowing her fucking brains out. She had only Courtney and a few other people. She started to worry how she would make friends and she prayed to whoever looking down who is putting her in these shitty situations to fuck off.

“Girl, do you think there will be a party tonight?” Courtney shoved Adore from her thoughts. Courtney was a slut, Adore just thought she was in her quest of love, I mean of course Courtney could get anyone she wanted. She just wanted that special someone to come over. Or she was just a slut.

“Hopefully Court, I want nothing more than 7 shots of Vodka and a lie down.” Adore breathed out, shutting her eyes closed. 4 minutes until class begins.

“Adore calm your damn ass! You’ll be fiiine,” Courtney smiled, giving a reassuring smile, turning back to her phone “Now find a good fuck.” She added with a wink. Adore looked at everyone interacting. It was kind of scary. Boys with their girlfriends wrapped around their finger, the popular girls, the gothic kids. It was kinda like High School. Well, thats fucking shit if its going to be like High School, Adore thought.

The bell rang, startled Adore from her thoughts, indicating it was time for class with.. Ms Needles?

Hm.

-

It had been 1 hour and 16 minutes since class started. Ms Needles was fucking bad-ass. She was super cool and Adore had a great feeling about her. The first hour we all introduced ourselves, explaining what we do and gave a little taster. Everyone seemed to like my singing which was sick.

I met a girl called Fame. Weird name. She was fucking stunning. Nothing else to it. I’m pretty sure she had an eye for someone else which sucked ass. Talking about having an eye on someone else, this unique girl called Alaska, thats a fucking cool name, she was pretty much chatting up Ms Needles. Kinda weird, kinda fucking punk-rock. Courtney wouldn’t admit it to anyone let alone herself, but Adore seen from the corner of her eye Courtney making shy peaks at a loud-mouth smart-ass girl called Willam. Adore could already tell Willam was a smart-ass but she was actually quite funny. Other than that, everything was going smoothly. Thank fuck.

After 10 minutes passed, Ms Needles asked them to pack up their stuff, whilst probably unprofessionally chatting up the student, Alaska. Oh well. Adore grabbed all her stuff up in her backpack standing up waiting for the bell to dismiss them.

“Adore, what have you got next?” Fame asked, smiling as she held folders close to her like a baby. Fames expression seemed thrilled, genuinely thrilled at the fact she had made a friend. It was strange but Adore felt like Fame had a traumatic experience in the past of some sort, so she made sure she gave her extra love.

“I have Fashion! I’m so excited! You?” Adore smiled, collecting herself as she sorted her dark brown into blonde ombre hair. Fames face lightened up and smiled brightly her laugh crinkles showing, jumping up and down like a fucking clown.

“Oh my god! Me too, Thank God!” Fame sighed happily looking up at Adores eyes. Her eyes widened as her head collected memory. “Violets gonna be in it! Yay!” Fame excitedly jumped up and down, Adore smirking in response.

“Who’s Violet?” Adore asked grabbing Fames shoulders to calm the fuck down. Maybe this was who Fame had her eye on. With that, Adore raised her eyebrow at Fame.

She blushed. HA! Gotcha prick! Adore started to poke Fames side as she squealed. After 20 minutes of pure torture for Fame, she breathed in from her red lips about to speak when-

Ring, Ring.

Both me and Fame sighed and nodded, heading to Fashion with our timetables shoved in each others faces. Adore and Fame fast-paced walked to Fashion. “Room 609, 609, 6 0, THERE!” Fame jumped looking at the light oak door. “Lets go!”

Adore and Fame walked into a small but warm classroom, Fame guided Adore to a table where 2 people sat. Fuck my ass, here we go. Well at least the room was pretty and kind of messy, put out well messy. Very much that.

Fame waved at the black headed pretty girl. Violet. “Hi guys! This is Adore!” Fame presented Adore like a trophy. “Hey Adore! I’m Violet.” Violet stuck her hand out to shake, Adore obliged. “I like latex, corsets and cherries.” She winked and looked at the smiling girl beside her. “I’m Naomi, Nice to meet ya!” Naomi stuck her hand out, and again Adore obliged. “Not telling me what you like?” Adore joked, sitting on a seat. Naomi shook her head. “I like my legs, food and parties.” Naomi shrugged her shoulders, laughing. “My kinda girl.” Adore commented, Fame looking pleased with herself. “Watch out Adore, Naomi has eyes on someone else.” Violet added, tapping her nose. “OOooooh who?!” Fame almost screamed, her eyes boggling out her head, leaning forward on the tall desk. Naomi put her pointer finger to her mouth, clearly signalling Fame to shut the fuck up incase anyone else heard. Adore laughed hysterically at Fame retracting quickly, her facial expression making the rest of them laugh. These fuckers were good! She was happy as fuck that she met nice people!

She was cut out immediately as the door opened, heels clicking and head turning.

Her heels were navy, screaming elegance.

Her legs, long and skinny, beautifully tanned.

Her dress, Royal navy off-shoulders dress that hugged her curves.

Her arms, a little shimmer as it hit the light.

Her hair, luscious and curled beautifully, a beautiful brown colour.  

Her face. Her goddamn face made Adore’s heartbeat make her think she was having a fucking stroke. She was fucking perfect.

It kinda felt like a movie. She debated what song would be in the background as she gawked at the stunning lady in front of her. Maybe ‘Off to the Races’ by Lana Del Ray. Or some cute sexy shit like that.

Adore wondered if she was a student. She looked radiant, very tanned and bronzed. Adore eyes darkened as she looked at the lady again, butterflies emerging after the 30 second breath-holding record Adore had just done. Fuckity fuck fuck shit fuck. Adore was nervous. Like fuck nervous. Like fuck I’m speechless nervous.

The woman stood in the middle of class. It seemed the noise of distant chatter had bleeped out for Adore. Is this like the shit when you meet your soulmate?

The woman was about to open her mouth. Lets go.

“Morning Class! I’m Miss Del Rio, you can call me bitch, fucker or bitch-tits out of class but not here I’m afraid,” Adore laughed louder than the class. This bitch was funny! Maybe the majority of the elephant laugh was because Miss Del Rio was purely beauty. Miss Del Rio. It suited perfectly. Miss Del Rio looked so exotic and classy. The only exotic shit about Adore was she could speak a little Spanish and she’d been to Arizona before. Thats about it.

“I’ll be teaching Fashion and listen, before we get into it, everyone has their own style. Wether its goth, pink, latex.” Adore could practically hear Violet smile ear to ear. “Or crystals and shit, You all have no right to judge. If you have a problem, fuck off.” Miss Del Rio shrugged as she walked over to the neat, oak desk, lifting a piece of paper and a pen. Miss Del rio was so smart and so open-minded! Adore smiled cheekily, and completely related to what Miss Del Rio says and feel 100% safer in this class.

“Now, this year you will be making a couple of dresses, some accessories, 4 tops and 2 pairs of jeans. On top of that mood boards and some writing but not all writing, so calm your titties, kids,” Miss Del Rio smirked, looking over the class.

“Right, just a quick check of people here. Just shout here or die bitch when I call your name. Also please put your hand up so I can judge you.” Miss Del Rio nodded as the students of the class giggled. It seemed everyone liked her.

“Phi Phi?”

“Here!” A blue haired, geeky looking girl put her hands up, smiling.

“Chi Chi, Wait what the fuck? Chi Phi wha-"

"Here miss!”

A fair haired girl with lovely skin put her hand up.

“Roxxxy?”

A curvy looking girl with a flawless face shot her hand up.

“Here”

She shouted out a couple of other names.

“Adore” Miss Del Rio said my motherfucking name. She was looking around, shit I guess its my cue.

“Here Miss Del Rio” Adore smiled happily. She knows she sounds like a brown-noser but fuck it.

Miss Del Rio looked over and her eyes widened and her jaw tightened. Huh? Did I do something wrong.

“Shit fuck” Miss Del Rio whispered as she ticked her name.

-

Why didn’t the Bianca Del Rio notice Adore earlier. She was fucking gorgeous. A fucking student, Bianca reminded herself as she stumbled to the desk, filling the register onto the laptop.

Adore was a student but Bianca had never seen someone perfect. Full lips, gorgeous complexation, bright eyes, she was absolutely perfect.

No, Miss Del Rio, You’re a damn lecturer and she’s your student.

Shut the fuck up, bitch.

You shut the fuck up, stupid ass bitch.

Bianca was practically arguing with her damn self. Fuck.

Miss Del Rio sighed as she stood up again, trying to keep her eyes peeled off Adore and paying attention to other students.

She still didn’t forget about the cute girl at the side of the room as she spoke.

What the fuck was happening to Bianca?

This year is going to be a fuck in the brain.

Fuck.