#where hte fuck am i gonna put it.

[nightfallsystem]

evilly laughing while tracking my package

[sanjisboyfie]

one piece smau: vacation edition

— strawhats being a cute friend group once again

— male reader, everyone having the tiniest crush on him too but thats only if u swuint (im a very selfindulgent writer sorry)

— also i imagine robin, franky and brook to be older than the rest of hte crew, but not like crazy older. its probably not really relevant, but like mid twenties insead of their thirties and forties LMFAOA the rest of the crew is young twenties

liked by ._.[name], princesanji, and 10k others

dni_nami: pre-7hr flight question, how long until we all start killing each other? everyone place your bets

tagged: ._.[name], freeluffy, and princesanji

uso_pp: we barely made it through the airport without losing luffy, so i'm placing my bet on one hour.

[liked by ._.[name], roro.zoro, and 20 others]

-> dr.law: i'm surprised you even made it through airport security....

-> freeluffy: TOORRAOO YOU SHOULD'VE COME IT WOULDVE BEEN SO FUNNNN!!!

-> dr.law: hard pass. good luck everyone else.

._.[name]: i think it's gonna be fine !!! what's the worst that can happen tbh

-> dni_nami: i could list 100 reasons why this is gonna go bad and all of them involve luffy.

-> robinkills: [name]'s right, i think this trip is going to be very fun !

liked by roro.zoro, robinkills, and 11k others

freeluffy: [name] rented bikes for us, but he won't let me drive :/

tagged: ._.[name]

SUPERCOLA: good job [name] for saving his life, much appreciated

dni_nami: i'm begging you two to not crash and make the expenses of our trip go up even more

-> princesanji: always thinking logically, nami, this is why i love you so much <333333333333333

roro.zoro: pick up some sake otw back

-> ._.[name]: yesyesyes we all know thats the only reason why you came anyway, i'll pick some up

-> roro.zoro: what. no way. i definitely wanted to be sat on a hours long flight next to luffy and be living in a small apartment with all of my friends who dont know how to speak quietly and wont let me sleep even when its already early morning. what. i am so excited to be here.

-> uso_pp: alright we get it please stop

liked by princesanji, SUPERCOLA, and 8k others

robinkills: thank you [name] for winning me the prizes :)

tagged: ._.[name]

._.[name]: anything for you robin <3 aka the person thats keeping all of us sane right now <3

princesanji: HOW DARE THIS BAFFOON STEAL YOU AWAY ROBIN PLEASE LET ME TAKE CARE OF HIM, I WILL MAKE SURE HE NEVER BOTHERS YOU AGAIN

-> uso_pp: when is sanji going to accept the fact that [name] is actually apart of this friend group and that he is also more favored by the women we interact with

-> ._.[name]: dw usopp he only puts on a hard front, he ltr begged me to room with him so he could cuddle w me at night. he's just being shy rn

[liked by dni_nami, roro.zoro, and 40 others]

freeluffy: [NAME] [NAME] DID YOU GET ME THEONE I WANTED TOO??!?!?! REMEMBER I SHOWED YOU

-> ._.[name]: yes luffy :) we are otw back and i have the one you asked for as well.

-> SUPERCOLA: [name] the absolute goat in dealing with luffy and his absurd requests so the rest of us dont have to

liked by freeluffy, roro.zoro, ._.[name], and 9k others

uso_pp: morning debrief where we all share embarrassing stories, like how [name] almost stripped completely naked drunk last night because an ice spice song was playing on the karaoke.

._.[name]: alright genuinely why the fuck did that have to be the caption you put on the internet for the whole world to see

-> roro.zoro: no dont be embarassed [name] it was funny watching you try and copy her signature pose

[liked by dni_nami, robinkills, and 90 others]

-> dni_nami: don't think about even crossing me in the future, i have a video of the whole thing bby

-> ._.[name]: GOD FORBID A GUY HAS FUN

skullnsoul: i found [name]'s dancing and singing quite endearing

-> ._.[name]: thank you brook :') you're so sweet

-> skullnsoul: yes, although i feel like you're much too old to be wearing underwear with hearts as the print, [name]. i suggest buying new pairs of boxers :)

-> ._.[name]: what the actual fuck

liked by princesanji, uso_pp, and 11k others

dni_nami: i really wish you could hear sanji cursing [name] outin this photo

tagged: princesanji and ._.[name]

._.[name]: me when im literally following the instructions that hes telling me and i somehow still get yelled at

-> princesanji: do you even understand hwo cooking meat works? everyone would have gotten salmonella and food poisoning if i didn't teach you how

->._.[name]: yelling is never the answer sanji

-> freeluffy: I THINK [NAME]'S COOKING TASTED REALLY GOOD

uso_pp: they acc cookeedddd tho like our food was so tastyyy

[liked by princesanji, ._.[name], and 9 others]

robinklills: sanji almost shoved [name]'s head into the griller, it was funny

-> ._.[name]: HE WHAT ??!?!?! I DIDN'T EVEN REALIZE THAT HE TRIED DOING THA TWHAT THE FUCK

liked by princesanji, ._.[name], and 12k others

roro.zoro: [name] told me to post this photo he took.

tagged: princesanji and ._.[name]

dni_nami: awww look all the boys finally getting along

[liked by robinkills, uso_pp, vivi, and 50 others]

-> princesanji: i would have much rather been in your presence my queen, i love you so much

-> ._.[name]: sanjii give up the bit for fucks sake

uso_pp: where was me and luffy's inv ??? ig its like that now ....

-> roro.zoro: you guys were playing mermaids in the pool at the apartment and explicitly told us to not interfere with your serious business

-> princesanji: and then you started getting mad at us for invitig you again right before we left

._.[name]: damn zoro u lookin mad fine in this photo shiiiitttt #smash

-> roro.zoro: i need you to make sure your door is locked later tn or else i cant promise you will wake up the next day

liked by dni_nami, vivi, roro.zoro, and 12k others

._.[name]: thank u nami for the photos

tagged: dni_nami

._.[name]: btw nami made me post this w that caption so it could "scare away the hoes"

-> dni_nami: im doing them a favor, they just dont know it yet cuz ur fucking insane

-> uso_pp: LMFAOAO

purrrona: can i bite it?

-> ._.[name]: BITE WHAT?????

-> purrrona: so is that a yes or a no?

-> uso_pp: professional dick rider alert !!!!

roro.zoro: why is your thirst trap the first thing i have to see when i open this app

-> ._.[name]: why are you acting like you weren't the first person to like this post???

[liked by dni_nami, robinkills, and 57 others]

portgasace: WHY THE FUCK WAS I NOT INVITED ON THIS TRIP?????

dr.law: id also like to thank nami for the photos

[idontremembershippingthis]

Vampire Heart Draculaura is so ridiculously pretty my first ever collector doll in my hands I can't even take her out of the box yet because even that is beautiful and pristine and she's here not just an image ona screen and god her skirt is so fucking huge I just keep looking at her like she's physical she is a real item in my hands sitting on my desk looking like THAT how is this legal I can't believe that she was worth the money I honestly wasn't expecting that but she's so fucking pretty I can't believe she's mine and I get to have her brand new her lashes are neat and her hair is so elegant and once I can bring myself to take her out of hte box I just know I'm going to have to keep it aren't I, where am I gonna put her god I really need to stop putting off reorganizing my displays my apartment is too small for this shit look at her little NOSE she's so sweet and gothic AGGHH

[trippy-maskow]

I'm not trying to be mean at all but you literally went out of your way to make an entire post trying to call out a grown adult and tell them when and how much they can draw and now you're upset he originally publicly tagged you in it? I know you're still young but you're about to be an adult and you need to understand that if you cross a line and act inappropriately then you're gonna end up getting called out for it. You don't deserve threats or straight bullying but you do need to understand that your post about Mark was not appropriate for you, a complete stranger, to have made and by making an entire post telling him what to do with his life you agreed to put your name out publicly. You're just made he didn't agree with you and now everyone is telling you how wrong you are.

Seriously this is not me yelling at you or anything, I'm trying to explain that you were not at all in the right.

Mark is an account that is seen by THOUSANDS daily, and when he linked my stuff i got dogpiled on, not jsut on my post, but in my asks, but also on HIS post. I think i have the right to be atleast a little bit annoyed.

NOTE: I am NOT annoyed at mark, I am annoyed at the people who are dogpiling even thoug hmark didnt show any distain towards me, or that there was a fued going on. he jsut responded. and people started bashing bc ig bashing is hte best course of action to show someone is wrong?? isntead of oh i dont know?? TALKING??

I didn't tell Mark how much he can draw though.. I just suggested he takes a break as he's been drawing daily for over a year straight, which isn't really healthy.

I am an adult? where i live atleast idk if where you live i dont quality as an adult but 18 is adult. (been one for like 9 days)

I admit that I did some things wrong with the post, and i will acknowledge fault with that. But acting like that warrants all this harrasment??? uhhhhhh

I never told mark what to do with his life??

Yes i agreed to have my name on MY post, to be naturally seen if it came across peoples feeds ect. Not be linked by a masive acount that is seen by thousands daily.

And i'm not mad that he didnt agree with me?? I have no clue where you got that bull shit from?? I updated my post responding to mark and responded that its a-ok everything hesaid.

And that "everyone is just telling me how wrong i am" By fucking harrassing me??? sure mate sure.

"I'm not yelling at you" i can feel teh rage in your post my guy.

[pinkseas]

[parasocial bestie] to both responses on ur wip fics; i'm not a writer myself, like in a fic way altho i pour my brainrots out in a narrative way its a Mess, but i get what you mean!! it does feel like the more you stretch a story out there's bound to be a lot of loose ends and gaps you need to fill since you basically expanded it. in a way its how it is with drawing when you do big Big projects, having too much blank spaces over your main subjects without a decent background of the piece can get Annoying.

"i have my overall goal and less of an idea of how to reach it" OKAY BUT PERSONALLY? not even gonna relate genshin than my own original stories i always have this problem and still do, like. having a Beginning and End but literally almost no middle bc theres SO MUCH TO FILL and you have to think how it progresses chronologically And logically how it reaches the ending you imagined. it felt easy, it felt nice and 'complete', until you think of the middle and thats how i have stories that never finishes itself and stick to just throwing ideas around but unsure to put it as its canon or not o)-( so yeah!! the closest i can understand of a Process especially to long narratives.

ANYWAY THE,.... THE LUMINE ZHONGI @XIAO LYRICS,.... when hte,... when the UHUHUHUHUHUHSUHGUFHGUHUGSUDHFSKFHSKDJH

oh. yeah. i realized i did sorta sent a Bunch of brainrot BUT LIKE PREE MUCH EVERYTHGIN I HAD RELATED TO UM,.. AKFJHD THE XIAO DYING ONE OOPS cus,..... becus ughuhfjfdhgk its like a Big fav for me and am curious (and now i am a lil embarrassed JKAFHSDKFJH) and anyways i have a lot of Impulsive Brainrot Showers,....... scattered in that big one i told u cus of the Potential,....

also ill have u know during the recovery after xiao woke he can be a little cold bc the incident rlly shot down his physical constitution to nature so lumine covers him in a lil blanket over his shoulders that he can walk around with and that imagery is probably an Icon that represents the whole brainrot in general. blanket taco burrito xiao i think. anyway lumine got bored and did crochet, taught xiao how since its easier than knitting that thoma taught her, and the guy spent hours continuously crochetting a sheet like probably miles long till late at night bc lumine forgot teach him how to End the stitching. sweet lovely dumbass <3333

yes yes the expansion and more gaps to fill !!! that def makes sense with art too we are shaking hands rn... and idk when you have the filler/details planned beforehand it can be SO fun but when youre struggling to fill in the gaps. well. Fawk

admittedly cannot relate too too much with having a beginning and end, 80% of the time when i write i start from the middle there's just So Much Middle and then i dont know what goes where or how to connect it or what to make the beginning or end and and. explodes. actually tbf i have a solid beginning idea for both current wips and a half-decent ending for one of them but god help me figure out how the FUCK im gonna end the xiaolumi one i havent even thought about it yet it could honestly go on forever <- my worst nightmare.... stories that are never finished my BELOATHED i definitely get that god we are shaking hands once more

THAT'S ONE OF MY RLY OLD FAVORITE SONGS ITS SOOOOOOOOOOOO. xiao when he sees himself as an object or a tool or a weapon or something horrible but never really a Person and the song captures that so well when you think of him and the uckfingfg.f the fuckifngfg.

explodes and dies

THE XIAO DYING ONE GODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD hold on finishing responding to this first

cold man with a blanket over his shoulders what if i Cried. that is so perfect in every way shape and form dear LORD. and lumi teaching him crochet and forgetting to teach him how to end the stitching is both so cute and so fucking funny dear lord this poor man sitting there for hours going on and on and on........

XIAO ALMOST DYING. GOD.

i have too many thoughts on death and near death and grief. something about xiao not allowing himself to grieve or process that he'd really been dead for a moment there because he survived, it's in the past, what is there to worry about? what is there to think of? it doesnt matter anymore. lumine struggling to come to terms with how close it was, constantly pushing back the what-ifs, if she'd been sooner if she'd been later if she hadn't been able to help him the way she did if zhongli hadn't come if if if if. zhongli, so accustomed to deaths of those so dear to him and moving forward from it, still shaken to the core because no matter how many times it happens you never really get used to it. it doesnt ever get easier. similar to xiao, telling himself over and over that it doesnt matter, all that matters is that xiao is okay, there's no need to grieve or be upset when he's alright. it's pointless.

lumine (and paimon) (and probably also venti lbr) bonking them both on the head because its important to process your emotions, because the fact that xiao isnt dead doesn't just magically get rid of the fear and the grief that the situation created. yes we Are talking about our feelings you stupid fucks ignoring the elephant in the room will not make the elephant in the room disappear. ignoring your feelings will not make them vanish it will only allow them to fester and grow stronger and more destructive!!!!

you'd think that people who've been alive for thousands of years wouldve learned how to express themselves by now but lumine and venti have to really push them through it.

and idk. just. the physical repercussions and what that means for him mentally. the intense feelings of self hate and uselessness amplified by being stuck in bed, amplified by being unable to move and fight and function the way he used to, having to relearn such "basic" things. he would be SO hard on himself about it. he should be better than this, he shouldve avoided it, it never shouldve happened in the first place, he should be recovering faster (nevermind that he is recovering exceptionally quickly in the first place, all things considered. just adepti things). and working through all of that, working through the frustration and the helplessness, being shown endless patience and love and care through it all, i just. mmmmmmmmmmmmmgmnfmngmfngmfdgnmg fuck.

finding himself useful and kept around and maybe even cared for as a tool vs being very suddenly forced to face the reality that even when he cannot fulfill his duty, even when he cant fight, even when he has no "use" and cant fulfill what he sees as his purpose- he's alive. he's cared for. he's loved and learning and moving forward regardless.

[roachemoji]

03 08 - Season Finale

SHFSKFDJHSDFK BIGGEST CONSISTENCY AT LEAST - WE KNOW DAMN WELL OUT KIDS ARE UP TO SOME FUCK SHIT

broOOO OBROR BOR RBO BOR OUGHGAKHJSDJKAHSDKAJSDKAJSDHASJH EW EW EWE WE EWEW EW E IM GETTING THORUGH THIS BY NOT LISTENING BUT OUGHHAKSDAKHJSDKHJ FUCKING HOLY SHITTTTTTTTTTTTTT EL EL ELE LE HELLO NO ? EW EW EW PUT A GLOVE ONNNNNN - NVM ITS WITH HER BRAIN FUCK THATS NASTY <- GUY WHO ACTUALLY DOESNT MIND GORE BUT APPARENTLY I HAVE CERTAIN LIMITS AND THATS SHIT UNDER THE SKIN.

EW EW EW VERY FUCKING. ALIEN CORE

FORGOT THE NAME OF THE MOVIE FOR A SECOND

ERIIICAAAAAAAAAAAAA !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GET HIS ASS. GET! HIS! ASS! FUCKING NUMBERS BRAIN

hopper shut UP SHUT UP!! !!!!!!

mY batteries low - Low oN SPOONS ? yeah

HOW LONG WAS HE JUST SITTING OUT THERE JESUS CHRIST I HAT EHIM SO MUCH DIE DIE DIE DIE

I AM EXPLODING BILLY HARGROVE WITH MY MIND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WHY DONT PEOPLE BELIEVE DUSTIN I HOPE SUZIE IS FUCKING REAL !!!!!

BALD EAGLE AKSJDHAKJHSDKA !!!!!!

iCKY !!! NASTY FUCKING FREAK ASS MONSTER DISEASED RAT KI N GGG ASKDJAKJH god this is such a nice shift though the atmosphere is so different and no longer feels like a scooby doo liveaction movie

hOPPEER shut up. stop talking. I dont like them together >:( i miss bob

i HATE how this thing MOVEDDD, i hate how you OOZE youre getting your ICK everywhere. nasty.

LUCAS AND HIS FUCKING SLING SHOT BABBEYYYY YEAHHHHHH

OUGH YOU KNOW ITS GETTING GOOD BECAUSE I KEEP FUCKING HAVING TO PAUSE THE GOD DAMNVIDEO!!!!!!!!!!!!! CANT KEEP THE SUSPENSE IS KILLING ME I CGOTTA KEEP PAUSING TO TAKE A BREATH AKSDJHAKSDJH

EW GOD NASTY NASTY NASTY LOOK AT ITS TOES !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SUZIE!!!!!!!!!

I LOVE WHEN THERES A CAR CHASE AND THEY STILL DRIVE ON THE CORRECT SIDE OF THE ROAD

DUUSTTTINNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHH LISTEN TO THEM IM FUCKING CRYING. PL EASE. AKJHKJHAJHKASDJKHADSLJKAHDKJHLASD PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEEE ILL ACCEPT THIS. BRINGINGBACK THE SCOOBY DOO LIVE ACTION ENERGY BUT ILL TAKE ITFOR DUSTIN!!!!!!!

EXPLODES BILLY WITH MY MIND!!!!!!!!!!!!

does no one. hear this happening like real talk i g everyone is at the 4th of july thing BUT LIKE ?????? OKAY ??? AND NO ONE HEARS THE MONSTER????????????????

THHE FUCKING DESTRUCTION ??????

OK.

oouhhakadjh ouGh y ikes y ikes yikes oH that was. SUCKING IN BREATHS THROUGH MY TEETH - i know hes posessed BUT ALSO ? HE WOULD DO THAT REGARDLESS HE DID BEFORE AND OUGAKHSDASKJH

god this underground russian base just looks FAKE like CARTOON ASS FAKE SHIT

god i just i hate Billy so much i hate hate hate htae how well written he is as an abusive older brother like holy fuCKKKKK youre hitting home in ways i cant even put into writing.

HAPPY FOURTH OF JULIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WHY DOES THIS FEEL LIKE STARWARS NOW I CAN AKSJDHASKJDH??? LI KE ?>>??? IDK HOW TO EXPLAIN IT BUT THE FIGHT BETWEEN HIM AND THE FUCKING TERMINATOR

i have nothing tos ay about getting through to Billy like that

IS HE FINALLY GONNA DIE IS HE FINALLY GONNA DIE !!!!!!!!!!!!

i have very complicated feelings about Billy but nothing to say about Max's reaction because I understand!! i get it.

i am SO HAPPY hes finally dying !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE

(also sorry Max for the complicated things you must be going through rn)

OH YOURE B ACK OKAY!!!! THE MILITARY FINALLY ARRIVED BABEY DAMN

El just. losing everything again?

OH hte fucking Satanism god

SDKSJDHFSDKJHDSFKJHFJDKSH STOP BULLYING HIM HES SO.

GODddddDDD PAcking,,, his DnD stuff 333 doesnt AKSJHD bUT for. AHH idk the shift athte end of the seasons where everything feels normal again always throws me off !!! akshj

i OUAKDHASKDH cant wait for them to be over it makes me so uncomfortable

SO IS HOPPER GONNA LIKE STUMBLE OUT OF THE WOODS OR IS MY MAN DEAD DEAD AKDHJSAKJDS

pLEASEEE introduce Erica to DnDDDDD PLEASEEEEE I LOVE H R SO MUCH

the ending having absolutely no music and its "snowing" FEEls like an implication that people are in the UD (Hopper) IDK

I... FEE L LIKE I MIGHT HAVE MISSED SOMETHING??? SAID THAT ASTHE POST CREDIT SCENE FUCKING ROLL KAJD

OH YEAH OK ERICA FORSHADOWED THAT EARLIER !!!! knew he'd come back fucking. FREAK ass egg man alright enjoy YOUR SNACK

okay anyway still feel like i missed some stuff but im not sure what hopeu all enjoyed my ramblings

Stranger Things - Season 3 thread 03 01

LETS GO GIRLS!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay okay okay starting off strong 1984 i see you i see you all these bald men are so sweaty and shiny and exhausted looking.

OH THE VFX BUDGET WENT UP BABBBEYYY OH LOOK AT THAT SHIT THATS COOL AS FUCK

So El isnt the one who opened the gate OG?? Really sick that they needed that much power to do it only forit to backfire and some little girl could do it with ease - OUFH SORRY TO THE BITCHES WHO JUST GOT EXPLODED

i understand why the bald men are sweaty and exhausted looking

SO WHY DO THEY WANT TO GET IN THERE SO BAD!!!!! OH THIS IS THE RUSSIAN PLOT PART YEAHHH

is this like ....... wanting to win the coldwar type shit??? because we're past the space race and into the 80s.... (<- guy who doesnt know much about this specific subject of history tbh)

EL LOOKS SO GOOD - fucking hate seeing them kiss im so sorry it makes me so uncomfortable - FEELING REAL HOPPER THOUGH LIKE ITS ICKY but also damn KING GIVE UR KID SPACE

i fucking LOVE THE shift in colours in this season !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LIKE ITS SO BRIGHT I LOVE IT!!!! AND STEVEEEE!!!!!! AND I FINALLY GET TO MEET ROBIN!!!!!!!!!!!!

oh this movie is foreshadowing some shit i can feel it. labesq SHIT!!!!!!! AND THEN THE POWER GOING OUT!!!!!!!!!!! this means things my brain is too small to make proper connections

OH SHIT LITTLE ME!!!!!!!

YEAH SEE Lost smoke monster !!!!! somethings thers i just know it

"im not gonna fall in love" "ok"

JOYCE MY BELOVED

booOOOOOBBBBBBBB!!!!!!!!!!!!!

DUSTIIINNNNNNNNNN

<- guy whose just REALLY EXCITED TO SEE THEIR FAV LITTLE MAN

GIRLIES WHO ARE WE LOOKING COOL FOR IM -

thought it waas gonna be gay forgot Billy existed

HOPPER IS ACTUALLY A FUCKING INCEL IM CRYING ITS BEEN LIKE 20 MINUTIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! KING OH MY GOD SHUT UP rooted for you but nah youve really always been like this

A Heart to Heart? What is that? <- man whose never been shown compassion???? WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DONT KNOW WHAT THAT IS shut up

ngl tho me n hopper shaking hands how to you approach people about things without people helping you write shit out word for word

this entire board roOM REMINDS ME OF THE BEGINNING OF SEASON 2 OF FARGO - but she a woman TYPE SHIT AKSHJD

Nancy is. trying so HARD and girl i am so sorry

HIS GIRLFRIEND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND THE WAY HE TALKS ABOUT HER <3333

Steve. i got nothing to add he just. wow

ROBIN I LOVE HER I L OVE THE PLATONIC RELATIONSHIPS ON THIS SHOW!!!!!!!!!!!!

Its romantic <- jealousy

Its gross <- somehow not jealousy tho sorry

Its bullshit <- jealousy

BRO ARE HE LLO WHAT PIED PIPER SHIT IS HAPPENING???? CRYING AT ALL THE LITTLE CGI GUYS LOOK AT THEM ALL!!!! THEY ALL HAVE LITTLE WHITE FEET THO???? THOSE ARE. exploding. theyre exploding. :(

ENOUGH OF HIM I DONT WANT TO SEE HIM I WANT TO SKIP THROUGH HIS MOMENTS I ACTUALLY HATE HIM SO FUCKING MUCH IM IN. PAIN. LIKE. OU GH. THE. SECOND HAND EMBARASSMENT IS? PAINFUL I HATE THIS I HATE THIS I HATE THIS I HATE HIM I HATE HIM IHATE HIM PHYSICALLY GAGGING

LUCAS AND MAX mAKE me so happy and MAx is still transmasc coded in my heaRTTTTT

DUSTIN BABY IM SO SORRY YOURE HAVING A MY CANADIAN GF MOMENT BUTSHES MORMON AND FROM UTAH

SHOWING MomEnts of Joyce being so happy and gENUINELY IN LOVE WITH BOB JUST HURTS SO MUCH HE WAS SO FUCKING GOOD. RAGE RAGE RAGE RAGE RAGE RAGE RAGE

oh now we have shit with MAGNETS and the spaceship space race cold war babbeyyyy

DISEASE RATS!!!!!!!

HOPPER ASHING ON HIS FACE KING????? OW?????????????????????

This is so uncomfortable bro my dad did this to me once and it was horrifically misguided on his part and he was making some wild ass assumptions about my relationship with certain people and oUGADHADKAJSHAKSJH this isthe season of second hand embarassment and its PAINFUL

MIKE IS JUST MA KING IT WORSE PLEASE SHUT UP I OH MY GOD OH MY GOD I KEEP PAUSING IT BC I CANT HANDLE THIS

HOPPER H ELLO ????

IM

THIS IS

BRO THIS fucking entire season is gonna be so fucking painfULLLL STOP STOP STOP like the. BROOOOO stop stop stop whose got a link to a breakdown of the family dynamics between everyone and how fucked up everyone is i cant even put thi sinto words im just losing my mind hopethis makes sense

SORRY DUSTIN I !!! GOD. PICKING UP RUSSIAN SHIT INSTEAD OF HIS GF SORRY

i literally cant handle this weird Billy fucking Milfs arc and i cant even begin to stress how much i fucking hate it and him. I have literally no room in my heart for that piece of shit

im SORRY to KaREN WHEELER THOUGH LIKE DAMN GIRL your mariage is in shambles and you really want to be fucked by THIS GUY ?

HA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IDIOT FUCKING GET ATTACKED BY FERAL DISEASED RATS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! CALLING ALL RATS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

KILL!!!!!!!!!!!!

i know he fucking dies but iM GONAN LOSE MY MIND DOES HE GET FUCKIGN KILLED BY STOPP STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP THIS IS SO FUC NNY YEAHH HYEAHHH BABEY FUCKING GET HIS ASSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE

[3liza]

hey im not gonna spread your weird social media-mediated brain infection on my blog, instead here are some cool studies to look at about how the "beautiful people have an easier life, every day, all the time" is a simplistic view, and is also patriarchal as fuck. more recent studies on "beauty privilege" are finding that the issue is complex, and that perceived beauty acts as a negative pressure in some/many social situations. i have always wondered why my experiences varied so much from the apparent wonderland the pop-science concept of "beauty privilege" paints, and more recent studies (often designed by women this time, imagine) are getting into the complexity there.

you personally may want to think about not reading my social media accounts if they are making you feel and act like this. i think i am not going to interact with you anymore if i can help it because i feel bad about what it is doing to you. anyway.

the short version is that beauty is beneficial in heterosexual social situations when dealing with the opposite sex, but detrimental when dealing with the same sex. this aspect of the research is usually ignored because who needs nuance in their pop psychology, right? not this guy (pointing 2 self)

very simply put, a beautiful woman can flirt her way out of a ticket from a heterosexual male cop. if she tries it on a person who doesnt consider her a potential romantic partner, there may be (and apparenly often are) negative consequences.

similarly in my own life i find that 99% of the apparent opportunities i'd been given for being young and fuckable were predicated on me actually fucking* the person who "offered" them, and most of them turned out to be fake/insincere opportunities anyway. tumblr refers to this as "grooming" when applied to child subjects (which i was, for much of it) but the behavior persists into the target's adulthood, middle age, and even old age if certain conditions are met. i can't find any studies on this because you can't put a Sleazy Guy in a lab setting and ask him "hey were you actually going to hire this woman on hte up-and-up, or were you going to 'hire' her and then spend 16 months making increasingly deranged sexual harassment attempts before reporting her to HR for made-up reasons and then finally firing her or hamstringing her career? just wondering".

i always think about that episode of Always Sunny where Mac goes nuts because every kid in his class was molested by the gym teacher and he imagines this to be some sort of privilege, even though charlie was one of the victims and is clearly devastated by it. thats what this conversation feels like every time it gets to the level of anons making fake tumblr accounts to KEEP pestering me about this stuff. remember that thing i said earlier about blood in the water, and how i dont post about bad shit that happened to me because it attracts the wrong kind of attention??? hehuehueheuheuhuehriuhgfidsrhru

actually thats a whole other realm of study: why victims of sexual assault and abuse are often re-victimized. until recently it was assumed that the victims were making bad decisions in who to trust, and this is sooorrrrtt of true, but doesn't tell the whole story. i read a study once that i am trying to find and will post later if i find it, that took video of adult women study subjects (who had agreed to be filmed) walking normally just down the street publically, and showed this video to male test subjects. if im remembering the study correctly, which i may not be, the male subjects who scored higher on psychopathy indices were better able to indentify the women in the test footage who had been sexually assaulted at some point in their former lives.

something to think about is a lot of "attractive" qualities (including proccupation with physical appearance leading to altering that appearance to be more beautiful), especially in the manic pixie archetype, are very strongly represented in trauma victims, especially sexual assault survivors (as is the opposite, intentionally trying to be "unattractive" to avoid further victimization). this includes "seductiveness", one of the adjectives used to diagnose child sexual abuse victims before the verbiage in the literature got cleaned up. obviouly a child cant be "seductive" and thats pretty offensive and fucked up to say. what they meant is that the childs behavior has been altered by trauma to become sexualized to appease attackers. this is part of the "fawn" sector of emergency responses in humans (along with fight, flight, and freeze).

so when we talk so cavalierly of "beauty" and "attractive people" vs "unattractive people" we are simplifying an issue that is so complex it is difficult even to think about. this complexity makes me go "hmm" every time theres a study on it, much less a popular belief. a lot of it sort of doesnt square with easily-observable phenomena: if physical beauty is so correlated to success, why are the 1% of wealthy people, politicians, actual power-holders, hell even the CEOs of normal companies, very very rarely what you would consider physically beautiful, even when they havent aged out of what the culture thinks is the maximum span of time someone can be "hot"? some of this is just personal preference, and it's real hard to study any of this because of how complex that issue becomes. but where are all these hot successful people i keep hearing about? are they all trophy spouses and retired from the public eye? you can definitely cherrypick examples of "influencers" etc but thats an extremely narrow line of work, and not representative.

anyway! lot of the "do beautiful people get more stuff" research is from quite a while ago, wasnt designed well, and was based on a work and social culture that was quite a bit different than it is now. but even older studies document this effect. ive spent like many minutes typing about this stupid bullshit so im bored and annoyed now and i dont want to type about it anymore

1. Effects of Self-Esteem Threat on Physical Attractiveness Stereotypes

2. Does being attractive always help? positive and negative effects of attractiveness on social decision making (cant find the sci-hub version, alas, but documents a negative effect we're actually seeing an anecdotal example of in my inbox rn)

3. Is beauty a gift or a curse? The influence of an offender’s physical attractiveness on forgiveness

* often it wasnt even just a sex thing. it's very very often a romance/relationship that is desired by the perpetrator. it's a misapprehension of the public that sexual harassment/grooming is "just about sex" or even less accurately "just about power", it isnt

[colorisbyshe]

Why are you following a twitter called Yaoi Polls??? 💀💀💀 lmao anyway, I get archive panic rather easily, so I don't really get into media unless it's a short canon or I rode the wave as it was starting. Like, those book series with 9 novels and counting? Or manga/anime like One Piece and the 16358 volumes/episodes? I just can't. I get too overwhelmed by that. However, I am intrigued by Star Trek. I want to join the Spirk navy lmao but I don't know where to start? There's too much canon. Help.

I'm following yaoi polls because I am a pacifist and hate war but crave violence. And because it gives me a chance to talk about my ships. But mostly it's for the violence.

Also, okay, there is too much Star Trek canon. And I am perhaps either a very wrong person to ask or perhaps a very right person to ask because I have.... dodged a lot of the Star Trek cnaon?

Like, if you like Trek, you're a real Trekkie, but if it was possible to be a fake fan... I would... dangle perilously close?

So, instead of giving you advice, I'm gonna tell you how I did it withotu being overwhelmed.

First, I got into star trek by watching hte "AOS" films, which are the three star trek films starring Chris Pine as Captain Kirk that came out starting in 2009. Three easy films to kind of dip you into the worldbuilding. These all feature characters (versions of characters) from The Original Series. They're "modernized" versions, so not necessarily the truest versions of themselves, but it's sort of like an intro course where you learn the basics and then if you go deeper, things get corrected or given nuance later on.

I decided, "I like these dudes, and I especially like Spock, I'm going to create a SCU--Spock Cinematic Universe."

So, I had tried watching the original series before and I'll admit, parts of it... aren't great? Some of it is problematic, some of it is just weird, and some of it is straight up boring.

TO kind of... help myself along, since I wasn't terribly invested in TOS yet, I looked up a few guides of "MUST WATCH TOS episodes" and a few "HEre's episodes you can skip." I compared notes, made my own ranking system sort of culminating htem all together (if one guide says definitely skip but another one says it's kinda fun, I know to give it a shot but not feel terrible if I zone out). TOS is VERY episodic, so going, "Huh, thi sisn't doing it for me," won't fuck you over MOST Of the time. But the guides help you figure out if actually you're gonna miss a huge moment of lore or spirk or whatever.

Most lists included which episodes of the animated series (based on TOS) you should bother with, that list is very sparse.

And then at this point, if you enjoyed it, youc an look into watching shit you missed out on or delving into novels (which I don't think are canon) or comics.

DO watch all of the subsequent movies, the first one is boring as fuck for a long while, but some of the ones after are AMAZING.

For a long while, this is where I put down Star Trek.

But then Discovery was introduced with a NEW Spock sibling and then SPock himself is in it. So I wathced the first two seasons (and intend on watching the rest) and then Strange New Worlds has ONE season... with Spock in it. So... I watched that.

And that's how I took a huge fucking canon and went "I want the parts with HIM in it" and ignored hte rest. Technically, I know Spock makes appearances in other series but like... none as Spock-centric as these.

I do intend on watching more Trek with time (TNG intrigues me, Deep Space Nine intrigues me) but like... I think Star Trek is very much what you want it ot be.

Sometimes, you're gonna be left clueless abotu references to past baddies or aliens or whatever (or sometimes FUTURE baddies or aliens) but like... it's fine? From what I've seen, ST canon can contradict itself or sort of... not mean anything sometimes, so like, take what you want, leave the rest. It'll be fine.

[figula]

therapy recap + some more indepth Feelings -

realised I never actually said about last week’s therapy on here

i went into some detail about some other stuff that hadn’t come up the week before: my long-term self harm, which i told her that i wasn’t particularly bothered by, but that seems like teh sort of thing you should probably bring up - and she didn’t argue with me. i explained my reasoning and she sort of nodded + seemed reasonably satisfied. this is encouraging to me: i can’t stand it when MH people are really scandalised about self-harm

she prodded at some of my plug thoughts - noted the inconsistencies, asked if I had had any traumatic experiences with fire (no), have i ever been badly burned (no), etc. then she asked how i am in a thunderstorm - am i afraid of the electricity then? i said no - in a thunderstorm i love it, and i asked her whether she remembered the thunderstorm a few years ago where the sky kept flooding w/ white light - it was amazing. me and ben went out to watch it in hte middle of a field. it did freak me out when we were there but not bc of the fire potential, but bc it was really, really intense - and that seems a fairly normal response to intense weather situations when you are outside with no cover. she said she did remember it. she said she watched it from her window. anyway: she noted that it was incongruent that my fear of plugs pertains to a fear of fire, but that there’s no real reason for me to have chosen fire as one of my things. which is true, i’m just not sure where to go w/ that. bc there’s a lot of things that my obsessions grab onto, and i don’t think any of them have real “reasons” for it. she suggested maybe a desire to control things that i feel are within my control (which feels a bit cliché lol) and also asked how i am w/ tolerating uncertainty. (”bad” is the answer) she asked me if i unplug things during the day (no), whether i unplug everything (no - i leave the fridge on + ana’s things that im not allowed to unplug) and asked me the perameters for the unplugging (just before i go to bed, at night, in the dark. if i go to bed at 7/8am, which is not hugely unusual for me, the need to unplug things completely disappears) i don’t know what any of this means. i don’t know if i care what it means. i just want to move forward.

Feelings:

feel a bit shit today - woke up feeling very anxious + had anxiety diarrhoea (posted earlier lol sry) then bc i was feeling anxious immediately went to weigh myself (lol hmm). i thought i’d be fine re: ana but im not really, i don’t like the temporary shift in dynamic, i don’t like being in charge of stuff, the medical vibe of the whole thing makes me very anxious, i fucking hate having to do the shit that triggers all my obsessive contamination thoughts, and i know it’ll be fine + this is gonna be the hardest bit of the entire process (bc obviously healing is fairly linear and after about 4-5 days the discomfort should be MUCH improved, and it’s already been 3) + that it’s fundamentally Not About Me lol and like it is what it is. it’s like 100% fine + im fucking delighted that ana got the surgery! im thrilled for them, and ALL of this discomfort is my own responsibility to deal w/ - ana is my best friend in the world + i am not gonna let my own insanities mean that they dont get to heal properly + appropriately.

so that’s that. i seriously juts need to get it together, and i know i will, it’s ok. like im seriously not doing very much extra at all, it’s just the entire situation that is setting me off, and as i said and entirely mean, it’s my own responsibility to deal w/ the feelings

i think im just constantly stressed atm (altho much better than i was a few months back, so i need to keep remembering that whilst i always struggle to put things in perspective, im objectively doing fine + good), im fed up w/ my mum’s awful cruelty, im fed up w/ my dad’s inability to see it, im fed up w/ the fact that my sister is 100% gonna come out of hospital in a few months + immediately start starving herself again. she asked if she could come here and i literally just want to say no, i want to cut myself off from my entire family at this point. but i know i cant - my sister’s done nothing wrong, and i cant/wont abandon her, but my god the whole situation makes me feel absolutely fucking feral w/ anger / terror / jealousy / frustration

[popculturebuffet]

House of Mouse: Mickey and the Culture Clash (Commission by WeirdKev27) or “What the Hell, Clarabelle?”

Hello, hello, hello... I wish I could say I was in good spirits but i’m tired, have covid induced chills running down my spine.. and oh yeah there was an armed insurrection i the captial last night that showed just how broken this country was. And while Monster Bash would still be relevant... I couldn’t do it. I admit to being unable to do an episode where the millitant racist nutjob who harms people runs off into the night, and does much worse in later episodes, while the people she harassed are arrested the night after a bunch of millitant, racist, sociopathic, selfish nightmares sieged the captial, killed a woman, raised the fucking maga flag over the buildling and took pictures like they were goddamn heroes.  We got a stark reminder, not a wake up call, not an opening a REMINDER of just how badly broken our country is last night, and it wasn’t till this morning I found out just how BAD it was. The deaths, the flag, the fact josh fucking hawley, MY STAT’ES SENATOR and registered piece of shit, raised  A FUCKING FIST IN SOLIDARITY, which gives me the crippling fear his stupidity and unabashed racisim and support of a cou could mean riots at best and attempted uprisings at worst and who knows what kind of hate crimes against those of color and those in my own queer community. I am afraid, tired, and I am pissed and I feel we could ALL use something wholesome, warm and far removed from the shit going on. And in my hour of need to figure out something like that to put on the schedule.. Kev brought up a wonderfufl idea.  Every month this month till the end of it Kev is going to comission one episode of a show near and dear to both our hearts that has it’s 20th birthday this month. House of Mouse. He was intitally going to request Pete’s One Man Show, which is one of my faviorites, but was ironcially one I already planned to cover next month to celebrate both the show’s anniversary and Pete’s Birthday. But since he was happy to wait till then to comission it, he instead asked for another classic and one with easily my faviorite character on the show: Moritmer Mouse. 

One of the best things House of Mouse did was bring back Mortimer Mouse. Introduced in Mickey’s Rival, Mortimer was an ex of minnies who showed up for one short to be a dick to mickey before running off and leaving Minnie at the mercy of a bull he pissed off. He also weirdly kept electrodes and a car battery in his pants. The short itself is.. not great mostly because Minnie dimissies Mickey rightfully being pissed someone is hitting on his girlfriend in front of him, making jokes at his expense, and generally being a pillock as being jealous... which yeah, yeah he is. Most of the time jealousy and supscison of your partner is ugly, gross and damaging to a relationship.  You should trust them unless you’ve been given good reason not to, and if your paranoidly jealous about every friend she has she could be attracted to.. get some fucking help. Seriously, I need to, not for this for various other problems, but get some therapy to help with your trust issues or if your just being the kind of dick who naturally assumes men and women or men and men or women and women or men and nonibinary persons, or women and nonbinary peeps and so on and so on cannot be friends if they could possibly be togehter romantically... grow up.  I say all of that because those are serious underlying issues and I didn’t want it to seem like for a moment I was supporting them... and because sometimes i’ts OKAY to be jealous, to either just feel a little jealous of someone, or to you know be irate because your girlfriend’s ex is hitting on her in front of you and she’s being entirely receptive to it. 

So yeah i’ts really hard to feel bad for minnie’s bull attack or find the ending sweet after Minnie was you know, what ramona said for an entire short. However my point for this rant, besides giving out about the short again because I clearly didn’t enough in my Mickey Birthday Special, is that Mortimer is still pretty great. He’s a frat bro in the 40′s sense sure, but the idea of a local douche hoping to swoop in and woo minnie away, who has an oddly specific sense of humor and a bizzare, memorable and wonderful walk, seriously the short is worth watching for mortimier’s “I got two car batteris in my pants’ walk, is a good one. While he’d naturally show up in comics and what have you Mortimer just sort of vanished. But clearly someone on the House of Mouse staff, and Mousewerks before it, agreed because Morty was made easily one of the best and most recurring characters in the HOM, and often more prominent than Horace or Gus. While he still tried his old “I’m gonna do your common law wife act” a few times he was mostly there to be an annoying douche when the ep needed one and to be taken down a peg by everyone in the house. And that VERY MUCH includes Mickey. That’s also part of why I love this show bringing him back: It gives Mickey someone besides pete to give out too on a regular basis. He’s still his charming self about it but it’s lovelyt os ee Mickey sarcastically roast someone. And I honestly attribute the main factor of his sucess on the show to VA Maurice LaMarche. While his original VA, Sonny Dawson, was fantastic.. it’s Maurice who very clearly made the character his. While others like Jeff Bennet have taken over since i’ts Maurice who gave him his signature “ha-cha-cha” catchphrase, swagger and signiture voice. And no i’ts not lost on me that one of Maurice’s OTHER best roles is another cartoon mouse.. and I now very badly want him to meet Pinky and the Brain. But yeah, Maurice just oozes the smarm that defines mortimer for me, oozes condescinon and assholery and he, is., glorious. He was a faviorite as a kid, he’s a faviorite now, and Disney needs to use him more.. and also have Maurice voice him for wonderufl world of mickey mouse, though Jeff Bennett is not bad at all I just prefer the master at the role. 

So obviously, after the nightmare of an evening america had yesterday, an episode not only about how wholesome mickey and minnie are but about Mickey teaming up with Mortimer was EXACTLY what i needed. So pitter patter, this is Mickey and the Culture clash. As always for house of mouse i’ll be chonking it up and since this one starts right with the wraparound, and sicnce you know I spent a godo few pagraphs going over mortimer and he’s only IN the wraparound this episode... let’s start there

Mickey and the Culture Clash: Don’t Go Changin, To Try and Please Me So we open the episode and the review proper with Mickey performing a banjo sernade for Minnie, their song in fact. It’s a really sweet scene.. that’s quickly ruined by Clarabelle being an asshole, who says i’ts a bit crude. Minnie counters that while “It’s not mozart”, it’s nice and she clearly likes it and the gesture. Instead of you know leaving it there like a good friend, like she’s SUPPOSED to be to Minnie in most continuities, Clarabelle.. takes the things she said and her having to run out to wrangle pluto out of context, painting it as her thinking he’s not sophisticated and then running out because of it. Oh and she tops it by pointing to a classified add from a MM looking for sophisticated companionship. 

It just paints Clarabelle not as Minnie’s friend or a chatty gossip, but as a heartless bitch who has no trouble implying one of her best friends would cheat on her boyfriend TO HIS FACE, and is fine wrecking a perfectly lovely relationship just to have more to talk about. Seriously she starts gossiping to everybody on top of it just in case you thought Clarabelle was a decent person in any shape this episode. She’s the one thing about this episode that dosen’t work despite being integral to it.. well two but hte other thing is a small, end of episode gag we’ll get to. This.. this is an integral part of the plot. It also relies on Daisy and Donald being absent for the episode for what I can only assume is their annual sex decathalon because otherwise the second she heard about her friend doing this, before reassuring Minnie, Donald would be holdiing her while Daisy beat the absolute shit out of her for hurting thier closest friend and not bothering to take a look into anything when leveling such a rough accusation at Minnie. In a really stellar, really well paced episode, Clarabelle being so heartless stands out. It’s also, might as well get this out of the way, teh final episode not inlcuding the two holiday specials.. and it’s a good note to go out on otherwise, I just can’t ignore the obnoxious cow in the room.. in both senses of the word. 

So yeah Mickey’s trying to be fancy, and Mortimer gets a good dig in about him reading “You having trouble sounding out the words”, but once he hears what’s going on, or rather once he realizes mickey things Mortimer’s personal add is in fact his girlfriend cheating on him, he decides to help Mickey. And to his credit for this con.. Mortimer actually thought things out on how to trick his rival, and his plan here is douchey as hell but incredibly genius: he offers to help mickey and while that’d normally be suspcious he offers a genuine, and very mortimer explination for helping him become a bit more sophisticated to win minnie back: if Minnie finds a handsome, sophisticated guy to date, what chance does MORTIMER have against that? At least with Mickey, in his deluded egocentric view of things anyway, he has a shot at beating him. 

So Mickey classes it up a bit, taking some sopshitcated stances when announcing and trying to woo minnie by talking in ye olde english. When that fails, she just finds it silly but charming, Mickey finds Jose.. hitting on her.

Just.. I expect better from you man. Woo ladies all you like as long as your respectful but I expect better than to hit on someone else’s girlfriend.. which granted he has but given the last time we saw him do that, he nearly got stabbed a bunch and the last time he agressively hit on a woman he got punched in the beak as he should, you’d THINK he’d of learned something. Seriously once again Donald is only missing because this time Daisy would be holding Jose down while Donald hit him. Or possibly they’d take turns. Point is Jose REALLY shoudln’t be doing this and knows better.. marginally. But.. it is in character enough so ti’s not as bad as Clarabelle the homewrecker. 

So Mickey tries being fancy and goes on to do poetry instead of letting O’Malley and the Alley Cats play.. which is a nice running gag the series does as they NEVER get to play.. which while funny is a shame since I love the Aristocats. So then we finally get what Mortimer’s been playing at, he swoops in, claims MICKEY dosen’t need HER, and uses the same personal add to trick her. See, while what Mortimer’s doing is vile.. unlike clarabelle I can repsect it at least. I don’t condone it and i’m glad he gets foiled.. but as a bad guy plan it’s pretty clever and for someone like Mortimer whose usually pretty incompitent.. it’s pretty suprising he could pull this off. It’s still pretty damn low and scummy, no question, but props to being able to outwit and nearly outplay two people who deal with your crap on a regular basis and still convincingly conning both.  Thankfully while he tries to take Minnie out Mickey, in a great visual gag, puts two and two together, and busts out their song, with Mickey and Minnie heartwearmingly reuniting on stage as seen above. Then we get that gag I mentioned not liking: Mickey gets Morty back by planting a false marriage proposal from Moritmer to Clarabelle, again under MM and he gets carried off.. HAHA HE’S BEING FORCED INTO A MARRIAGE HE DOSEN’T. LAUGH. LAUGH AT IT. The gag just really hasn’t aged well, as otherwise it’s clever Mickey used Mortimer’s own trick against both him and the person who caused all of this but really.. Clarabelle gets no real compuance. At worse sshe finds out she was tricked.. but she again you know tried to break up her close friends relationship for shits and giggles. But .. it’s at the very end of the episode and very easy to ignore, so it dosen’t really bother me too bad, and compared to some gags of the type i’ve seen, it could be MUCH worse.  Overall this wraparound is one of the series best and a good one to go out on. it has a simple premise, a brilliant antagonist plot, some great bits from all involved, and even a great Belle and Beast cameo. All in all a really good wraparound only hampered by a sexist and dated ending and Clarabelle being portrayed as ...

She’s the worst, in the world. Okay onto the shorts.

Mickey’s Piano Lesson: That was a Fun One

It really was. It’s a simple premise: Minnie wants MIckey to do a piano recital and he decides “I don’t need practice i’m mickey mouse. “ And it’s REALLY nice to have a short that has, rather than aw shucks mickey, shenanigans mickey. While thanks to the new shorts we’ve had tons, it’s still nice to get one in the House of Mouse era, and it’s just fun to see Mickey take the usual donald roll of letting his overconfidence punch him in the face> It fits both though: Both are everyman and while I lean towards the duck, to no one’s shock, Mickey is just as capable, and his lack of practice comes off less like the angry and hostile way donald would dismiss it and mroe just loveable procastination. And as someone who REALLY struggles with procastination I related to this short, as Mickey does everything else he’d rather do from bathing the dog to skydiving till Minnie, in a great bit informs him everyone from the president, to several dignitaries from other countries, to a televised audience will see. We then get two really great and really beatuifully animated bits as MIckey wrestles with the notes on thep age then fights with his piano as he performs, still pulling it off but destroying the thing and rightfully earning a glare form his girlfriend. Just a fun, slapstick short with a great premise. 

Dance of the Goofys: Scary Children Set to classical music, this one has a bunch of goofys as Fairy’s, who are making the flowers go and the one who sleeps in ends up saving the king from a horrifing looking little brat. He reminds me of Montanna Max a bit.. speaking of which Creer Summer recnetly announced Elmyra won’t be in the reboot. And while this does make me fear actually good characters like Fifi, Montana Max, and more will be cut like the animanics reboot and I do feel for Cree not getting to be involved and hope they find another roll for her as, given her status in the industry she deserves better.. THANK FUCKING GOD. I’ll go into this in another review I have planned for the future but unlike the cuts made to animaniacs this was a REALLY good decision i’m really greatful for. Thank you crew thank you. 

Back on topic, it’s just a fun, really beautifully animated short about the goofies and hteir shenanigans with a really great high concept. 

Maestro Minnie: Brahm’s Lullabye: Simply Irresitable Another simple but clever and lovely to watch one, and one I like quite a bit more. Minnie is conducting some living violins to Brahm’s Lullabye to get a baby Violin to sleep, and we get some really beautiful shots of her as she does so.. only to get comically interuppted by other insteruments turning up the noise. Not much to say on this one as it’s short and simple.. but sometimes short and simple is just what you need and the fun premise nad really beautiful especially for tv animation at the time visuals really sell this one.  ONce again, good stuff. 

Overall: This was a REALLY good note to go out on. While as I said the Clarabelle stuff can eat my entire ass, everything else is really damn good and I highly recommend checking this one out. Next time, in about a month, we’ll be looking at Pete’s spotlight episode for his birfday. While you wait tommorow we have my first look at legend of the three cabs. But for now, goodbye, goodbye, goodbye. 

[queencryo]

I’m gonna liveblog my ccapstone final presentation and you’re all going to have to deal with it ^_^

ASPODFIASPODFIAPOSDFIAPOIVZJX PROF IS DOING A DESCRIPTION OF THE TEAMS WE ALL INHERITED FROM

THE ONLY GOOD THING SHE HAS TO SAY ABOUT THE ONE WE INHERITED IS THAT THEY WERE REALLY PERSERVERING. I’M LOVING THIS. THEY TRIED SO HARD BUT GODDAMN.

liHoly shit the glove group’s demo looks SO much better than their previous one. Full swag! full swag! And putting up a dude with TWO future tech cool gloves is always a huge coolthing to do during your presentation you know? That slaps hard.

Hope our presentation goes well, really badly hope it does... Man I hope they don’t shit on our putting so much time into internal testing for the presentation? That testing is what saved our project (ie: what made our prof finally start being on our side on things)

Holy shit I forgot that the glove group fucking. used pressure-to-conductance sensors then did tests with a cooking scale to convert their voltages to gram-force (which is what “hand specialists” use I guess????)

I’m fucking gargling, glove team had a team member in thailand so they did a lot of work at 830 PM or 830 AM. (*Ignores that we did a huge amount of work between the hours of 9PM and 6AM*). oh my GOD the guy in austin just.. left his computer on and the thailand one teamviewer’d into his PC to program stuff...

THEY FRIED AN ARDUINO. AND HAD TO SAW THROUGH IT BECAUSE UNSOLDERING WAS TOO HARD. ***AND THEY ACTUALLY PUT THIS INTO THEIR FUCKING PRESENTATION***. WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

I FRIED A RASPBERRY PI BUT YOU DON’T SEE ME PUTTING THAT SHIT INTO OUR PRESENTATION

also dude y’all know the budget of $200 was what the university would give us right? you know you were supposed to get under $50 for the project itself right? right?

Glove group is getting some hard questions. Not insurmountable, but not easy. Hopefully I can figure out anything they ask!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA also i am out of adderall so we’ll SEE how this goes :)

Next up is uhhhh I think one of the survivor guys? The phone guys? I’m tryna be p vague but yeah

holy SHIT survivor guy demo was. so bad. so bad. the audio sounded terrible, the splitscreen videos weren’t synced up quite right. oh my god. I don’t want to be mean but I’m just. literally I was cringing. jeez. Bad audio.

The rest of the presentation isn’t as bad, except that oh dude I can see part of your windows background? and your taskbar? AND YOUR TASKBAR IN A COUPLE OF FRAMES ELSEWHERE???? it just. this doesn’t feel like they put effort into it.

They do all look crisp with their white button-ups though. our team decided on black t-shirts, because we’re all fools.

WHY IS YOUR ENTIRE PRESENTATION NOT FULLSCREEN. DUDE DID YOU ONLY DO ONE TAKE ON THIS SHIT?

I feel like their presentation genuinely looks worse than their prafctice presentation. jesus. FULL SECOND BLANK BLACK SCREEN DURING SECTION TRANSITION

im bored so im now zoning out and talking to my friends on pisscord~

I’m also... unmedicated lol. im ouuttttttttt

oh! I asked some porn lady on twitter where she gets her hormones since I’m about to graduate out of access to the uni clinic i get em from now, so imma look into that at some point :) some kinda. anime-themed hrt distribution thing.

Which is weird but hey. I figure... if they’re putting effort into theming, they probably aren’t putting out cocaine-laced trash ya know?

THIS MOTHERFUCKER GETTING DISCORD NOTIFICATIONS WHILE THEY’RE ANSWERING INDUSTRY PROFESSIONAL QUESTIONS

literally chatting with my friends and manically laughing in hte moments up to my final presentation. this is just like my high school graduation.

Alright we’re UP babes. my video is ON and our recorded presentation is UP on my teammate’s (and perhaps... *friend’s*............) sccreen (that was a joke) (but yeah the presentation is up we’ere just waiting to GO baby!)

YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Aaaand muting our presentation during the parts I talked in... I like her fine I just don’t want to listen to her...

The industry guys look perplexed but idk if th oh GOD why is the video stuttering... I hope that’s on my side not on anyone else’s...

aaaaaaaa I hope they don’t ask us anything TOO hard. they’re probably going to ask why we used the sensor we did, but beyond that I really have no idea.

okay im paying attention again. I think our presentation is a LITTLE on the sexual side. I can’t be sure but... :smirk: Wish I had a friend who talked as much as me. Ah man you know what I miss? Watching movies with Al or Morgan. never hung w ppl who talked during movie theatres as much as them and me :) It was really good times!

God our mobile application UI is OS fucking sexy. holy fucking shit. God our guy on that did such an amazing job. There’s even animations when things are happening? It’s SOOOO good.

Now is the internal testing section of the presentation. Kinda show off that “hey mang our sensor just sucks DICK.” it’s super narrow and it HATES detecting black things. ... holy fuk I hope the choppy video is on myyyy siiiiiide... .. eh, I guess chopy video is kind of survivable. Not exactly our fault or something we could possibly predict, you know?

DISCORD

THIS IS A TRASHBIN FOR ALL MY WORDS SO THAT I DON’T TALK OR SAY SOMETHING STUPID WHERE IMPORTANT PEOPLE COULD SEE IT. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

at least the audio isn’t usually choppy during the parts of the presentation that aren’t videos? so that’s awesome :)

We did solve the problem of our faces getting in the way of the presentation

NOOOOOOO MY NAME ISN’T MARROW NOOOOOOOOOOO

ASDFASODPFAISPDFOI SHOWIN OFF THE PREVIOUS TEAM’S SHIT. PUTTING THEM ON FUCKING BLAST. FUCK Y’ALL. tho i did have the realization last night. you know what... if I passed with that shit I put in for 462, you know what... they can pass with what they did for this course. neither was good. <_<

ah fuck I’m talking again I gotta mute THAT SHIT (if it’s not clear, we pre-recorded our presentations and are now just... showing that, in da meeting).

hell yeah man hell yeah man

I think if they ask about our sensor choice I’ll say we got a $20 sensor beccause we had a budget of $50 for the final system. which. we SHOULD’VE then said “ohka ylet’s not use LiDAR.” but we didn’t, so here we are! I... think maybe part of this is my fault. Maybe a pair of microwave sensors was the way to go after all.

OH FUCK THE PRESENTATION IS OVER TIME FOR QUESTIONS.

They asked about the environmental concerns, and why we mentioned 3-d printing for the chassis when we didn’t actually do any such printing. both directed to me. we didn’t do any enviro conerns, and we didn’t end up 3-d printing because we couldn’t get it working so we just went with wood the whole way through.

Of course, we have a question about messaging between cones, because hey i mean that’s the most interesting part of our project, from a design standpoint. it is. it is. it is.

AY THEY SHOUTED OUT OUR ZOOM BACKGROUND FUCK YESSS

AY WHOOP AY WHOOP AY WHOOP THEY DIDN'T ASK SHIT ABOUT OUR PRESENTATION (i ASSUME BECAUSE IT WAS SO FUCKING FLAWLESS AND AMAZING THAT THEY HAD NO QUESTIONS AT FUCKING ALL BABY) 

THEY LITERALLY ASKED 4 QUESTIONS, ABOUT ENVIRO CONCERNS, CHASSIS, MESSAGING, AND SOME QUESTIONS ABOUT THE DATABASE

GOD THIS IS SO GOOD AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

goddamn. survivor guy group 2 is going SO MUCH BETTER than the last one. opened on a description of the project, with the arm slowly opening to reveal their little screen with a heart on it... that’s SO good bro.

This presentation is so much better than the last one. Oh my god this is so good bro. Y’all did so awesome. I’m in lvoe with you. LOVE THIS SHIT

lmao oh yeah our CPM critical path went from 30 days to like 79 days. partially cuz 30 of our days were spent waiting for parts...

SURVIVOR GUY SHOWING OFF THEIR ABILITY TO PLAY VIDEO WITH A CLIP FROM THE OFFICE. DEEPLY IN LOVE WITH THEM (I DONT LIKE THE OFFIE BUT THAT’S WAY MORE ENTERTAINING THAN THE OTHER SURVIVOR GUY TEAM’S EXAMPLE OF THE SCHOOL FIGHT SONG YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH)

really really great presentation. I went into their pisscord and made sure to tell zem i loved their presentation.

AW DUDE I LOVE MY SISTER SO MUCH. NOT RELATED. JUST LOOKING AT MY DMS AND SAW HER NAME.

I don’t really care about group 5. i just don’t care! I’m. my part is done. I’m free, mostly. I’m god now....

yeah i haven’t paid attention to much on group five. just can’t be assed!

bluh i have a shitton of history homework due tonight... gotta do an interview and like 5 fuckin writing assessments. Really dropped every ball available ya know?

PROF SAID “THIS IS THE BEST I’VE EVER SEEN GROUPS DO” IDK IF THAT’S TRUE BUT HELLLLLLLLLL YEAH I FEEL FANTASTIC

Prof says yall did great, woulda done great under normal circumstances and that you did so good under these is amazing.

:)

Something about making an abstract or something...? Student research week or something.

goddamn. finality. we did it folks. holy sh8it. last meeting ofthis class. kind of... the last meeting of my college career, if everything goes as planned? so that’s. weird.

hhhh okay i can’t let Finality Anxiety get to me I still have shit to do. don’t let it set in!!!!!!!!!

[dom-i-nic]

the most painful parts of tcw season 7 bcuz i just read such a painful post abt it and decided to relive it. obvious spoiler warning for those who havent watched tcw season 7

- that picture, that fucking picture of fives, echo, cody, and rex all happy and shit

- cody going “sometimes in war its hard to be the one who survives”

- ECHOOOOO i am sobbing at this point and its like two episodes in

- also this is the last time we see kix before he gets turned into a popsicle so....

- the episodes w/ sokes and trace and rafe were pretty okay, just some dumbasses tryna conn a cartel

- obi-wan and anakin talking with ahsoka

- “we’re going to coruscant” no ur not bitch sit ur asses back down right now thats an order

- ahsoka saying she was gonna talk to anakin and then she didnt fuckdammit

- that last comm with obi wan where hes like we’re going to utapau NO UR NOT UR NOT GOING TO UTAPAU UR GONNA GO TALK TO ANAKIN ABT HIS UNRESOLVED DADDY ISSUES

- maul.

- more maul.

- maul’s fucking visions dammit

- jesseeeeeeee ur so pretty and yet so doomed

- mauls fucking visions dammit

- that slight pause when ahsoka considers his offer. please take it i am begging u TAKE IT HES RIGHT I AM BEGGING U

- SHE DOESNT TAKE THE OFFER T-T

- maul screaming and writhing and yelling that theyre all gonna regret this and theyre all gonna die and hes right yes i kno ur right u repressed anger muffin why the fuck wont ANYBODY listen to u

- all those smilesssssssssss nooooooo (also i kno mauls eyes were supposed to be intimidating but it was just so funny like u could put his coffin ass thing on the ground and use it as a table and mauls eyes would just be watching u with vengeance and death while u took a bite of your sandwich)

- ORDER 66

- ORDER 66

- ORDER 66

- O R D E R 66

- at this point i am sobbing in a corner

- rex’s tears T-T

- theyre tryna kill her

- THEY TRYNA KILL HER

- REX SOUNDS DIFFERENT

- EVERYBODY’s DYING

- E V ER Y BODY S S D Y INGGGGGG

- rex shot his brothers alksdhkjsdedjklnsadlj

- THAT SCENE IN THE HANGAR JESSSEEEEE WHYYYYYY (on a side note jesse looks hella fine in arc trooper armor) WHYYYYYYYyYYYYY

- STOP IT STOP IT STOP TRYING TO KILL HER STOP TRYING TO KILL HIM STOP SHOOTING PPLE

- MAUL GEt ur ASS bacK HErE U TRICK ASS BITCH

- oh my god these bitches dead.

- the helmets noooo why the helmets WHYYYYY

- jesses helmet. JESSES HELMET J E SS E S H E L ME T i am deadeth

i’ve probably drowned in my tears at this point

- THEY WALK AWAY TOGETHER

- ANAKIN WHAT THE FUCK

- ANAKIN HWHWAT HTE FUCKKKKKKKK

- LOOK WHAT U DID U LITTLE SAND-HATING BITCH

LOOK WHAT U DID

ANAKIN SKYWALKER COME BACK HERE AND FIX THIS MESS

[tanoraqui]

please write more for that au its SO CRAZY GOOD i need more... youre such a brilliant write

no knowing what this was about. Please enjoy character sketches of six generations of Watsons + a couple Holmeses, courtesy of this bit of technically-original-fic-because-of-public-domain. Still not sure what I’m going to do with all these people!! 

Mycroft Holmes, 1830 - 1901

Original incarnator and namer of Sherlock Holmes

Basically to see if he could. Incarnator and academic studier of spirits. Spark, and good at it.

(Death spirits aren’t very stable bc they tend to. Um. Kill the host. Only so much you can do to restrain the nature.

Mycroft concluded that that’s bc it’s always polluted by the fear of death - pure death would be more directable

He was right? Also, I guess mildly suicidal? And did a lot of trial and error in brief experiments in hospices, even a war zone or two, over a decade or so. Personality developed based on Mycroft’s, ofc, cool-emotioned but ever-curious, and an ego the size of imperial India

So Holmes was substantial enough to manifest more or less as we know him when Watson had a panicked moment on that battlefield

John Watson, 1867 - 1891

Bearer of Sherlock Holmes, 1886 - 1891

Dutiful, mom friend, selfless, kinda all or nothing, quick decisions - good in medical emergency, sometimes impulsive/reckless, mediocre shot except at snooker, reads for fun - especially once he picks up a bookwormy demon

Trained incarnator-physician

Summoned him in a terrible moment in the war in Afghanistan(?) in 1886

The field hospital was under attack, evacuation having been interrupted by unexpected enemy maneuvers, and Dr. Watson was torn between shooting on the enemy and trying desperately to tend to patients, but there was no way out and nothing but death all around. Nothing at hand but death.

So he figured “what the hell” and summoned a spirit out of that, bound to his own body ofc, and had him kill all the enemy. Holmes offered to take some of the death out of the British wounded as he did. A friendship began.

“Listen here, Watson - war is no place for pure death!” -some discomfitted superior officer, dismissing him from the service

John didn’t fully disagree, the easiness felt wrong - but it all felt wrong. And the medical applications…

But no hospital would hire him, with a death demon and the way he flinched at sudden noises still, hands that still shook 

Holmes scented a recent death, they interrupted a police investigation, impressed them with medical knowhow + death sense (passed off as medical knowhow for the moment?)

And That’s How We Ended Up A Consulting Detective 

Died in 1891 in the course of dispelling Moriarty, a life demon and criminal mastermind - fell off a cliff, on top of him, to injure the body so bad Moriarty had to vacate

Mary Watson née Morstan, 1876 - 1929

Bearer of Sherlock Holmes, 1891 - 1914

Sensible, dutiful, decisive (good in crisis, sometimes bad choices, esp. in anger), more aware of her own faults than John but also must work harder to overcome internalized prejudices

Took up Holmes after John’s death, to (vengefully but well-intentionedly) scour any trace of Moriarty from Earth.

Often did so with Young John on her hip, bc what else are you gonna do. Could’ve gotten a nanny but didn’t have too much money and (along with Holmes) was more worried about him out of her sight than chasing murderers with them

In the early 20th centuries, she started getting overtures from the British government re: taking Holmes to war and just, you know, fucking shit up. When WWI started, she and Young John quickly devised a Plan™

Young John Watson, 1891 - 1939

Bearer of Sherlock Holmes, 1914 - 1939

Eminently practical but secretly romantic, nay, Romantic™, drinks hella respect women juice, quick-thinking

His mother started calling him “Johnny” instead of “Young John” when he was 2, but Holmes never picked it up - to Johnny’s annoyance, bc he wanted to, you know, not just be his father. They had a full argument about it, Holmes refused the juvenile nickname, but did his best to use “John” for like a week before reverting. It grew on him a little, though.

The Plan™:

Basically, the govt had slowly come around to the idea that a weak and feeble woman was in possession (ha) of one of the strongest demons in England. They (she and Young John) were sure she’d be summoned once war broke out - indeed, perhaps she was, but it was more like sounding her out and she put them off. Can’t draft a woman after all.

But clearly they’d escalate, so…fortunately, John had fallen thoroughly and mutually in love with a young American woman, who didn’t mind taking him home at all - they’d probably beaten it around the bush a little, hypotheticals, and then this…there was a bit of a tizzy tbh. John nearly fucked it up, emphasizing that he was immigrating for Holmes and not for her, no pressure on her whatsoever. Possibly they didn’t sort it out until they arrived in New York - though this did have the boat ride to do it.

But yeah: Mary released Holmes, John took him up and left the country with the govt none the wiser, Mary continues putting off the govt until the passports were thoroughly stamped…

And then America stayed out of the war long enough, and idk if “conscientious objector” was a thing but I’m sure he found some way to put it off. 

Holmes did well during the Great Influenza, at least.

Buuut they ended up consulting detecting anyway lbr. 

Shot in 1939, possibly by sniper in crowded area or at least by gunmen in unexpected attack, on a case set up by Moriarty…

Gave Holmes his death, final order to get Jillian out of here alive. 

Amelia Hunter, 1896 - 1966

Moderately wealthy New York family

Visited her second cousin in London in 1913-1914, as well as the English suffragette movement (herself a part of the American movement)

Met and fell quite in love with Johnny Watson, with a cheerful dose of “your mother is so cool.” Cheerfully helped him and his mother con the British government out of a death demon, married him once they both got their heads a little straight

Jillian Watson, 1920 - 2019

Bearer of Sherlock Holmes, 1939 - 2019

I’m not saying she swore vengeance on not just Moriarty but the entirety of Nazi Germany whom he was supporting (for fun a profit, per usual), after they killed her father in front of her - for almost certainly the express purpose of keeping Holmes out of the incipient war - but I’m also not…not saying that

Nor am I saying that she was part of the inspiration for Captain America in this ‘verse, or at least for Peggy, but I’m not not saying that either

Slightly rogue incredible combat fighter who volunteers to go fight Nazis before it’s even cool? Yeah. Yeah. Some Peggy art just straight-up looks like her, once Kirby&Lee somehow met her

Jillian Watson. How do I begin to describe Jillian Watson

Jillian Watson is a superhero. Jillian Watson is a spy. After WWII, once someone in the army decided it was better to work with her than against her, she ended up in…whatever proto-CIA they were forming at the time

Also, got married and had a kid while still on semi-desk duty

Jillian Watson is known as “Angel of Death” in 40 languages in 95 countries. Jillian Watson liberated at least one Jewish concentration camp. Jillian Watson stopped the Cold War from getting Hot at least twice - and neither time involved Cuba. She was on vacation that month.

And Holmes, obviously. They had a very solid hot/cold balance - only one was ever emotional at once

Jillian Watson has kissed a KGB agent, killed a king, and met nearly every US President from Truman through Reagan. She liked Eisenhower best. Carter downright annoyed her, and she nearly had a shouted argument with LBJ, though they also exchanged a handful of letters

Jillian Watson probably helped bring down the government in Iran in the 70s

Jillian Watson was probably not a great mother. She was too busy chasing adrenaline and maybe glory. 

They liaised with the FBI, too, as it grew, and shifted to their Spiritual Crimes Division completely in the late 60s/early 70s, when age was starting to really catch up with her - a death spirit can keep away infections and viruses, but not the simple wear and tear of age and adventure

When the AIDS crisis hit, Marcus put them in contact with people and Jillian Watson once more became known as the Angel of Death, this time for bringing mercy

Retired age 80 (2000), under duress. Still did some consulting. 

Liz was an option, but she was already getting on, and maybe irritated not to have gotten Holmes before (and/or maybe growing out of that desire anyway?) Manuel was a candidate, but Holmes needed a lot of talking around - and it didn’t matter yet, bc neither of them wanted to be parted. Neither could quite forget losing her father (or hte original John Watson) and Holmes meant to stick it out, and Jillian had no intention of retiring that much

Eventually got some quite contacts - nay, friends! - among elderly in her area to engage in consensual euthenasia now and then. Supplemented by hanging out in morgues and cemeteries and buying and killing a TON of plants, and sometimes mice.

Went on a lot of protest marches in retirement

Marcus Watson, 1920 - 2005

Twin of Jillian

Gay

Settled down with a lovely partner (Henry White) sometime in the 50s in NYC, where they lived for the rest of their lives

Not particularly interested in the life of a consulting detective/incarnator. Didn’t mind, but got squeamish, and just…didn’t enjoy being in danger. John took him on a couple cases but Jillian was the one who wanted to go, to know, even when they were kids, and he was happy to let her. Born to be a house husband.

He and his Henry were fully exclusive, neither got AIDS - but they lost a lot of friends. Practically, he turned Jillian and Holmes on to the crisis, connected her with people who knew people

Jeremiah Fletcher, 1918 - 2000

Married Jillian Watson in 1946

Fell in love when she broke him out of a German prison in 1942

African-American

Elizabeth “Liz” Watson, 1949 - 2009

Free spirit, adventurous, thought her mother (+ Holmes) was the coolest person ever, wanted to be the same. 

Legitimately badass in her own right. Joined…same service probably? They didn’t want another woman but someone intelligent resigned themselves to at least having a Watson in reserve, in case they couldn’t convince the demon to accept another host

Though, why “convince” when you can bind?

And if there’s no alternative, maybe he’ll be happy with a proper agent…

Or there was one person hiring who wasn’t a total ass, eventually

Though possibly by that time she’d decided “fuck it” and set out on her own

Basically a mercenary. Expected to inherit Holmes when her mother retired. There were some awesome mother-daughter expeditions

Got having children out of the way early - one child, at least, via a random French man in the summer of 1970. Donna from Mamma Mia energy. Jacques SomethingFrench

Tension with her mother (and Holmes) grew as Jillian continued to not retire and Holmes…tried to look after them both tbh. Liz hated being cosetted

Heart attack age 60, slightly adrenaline-induced but relatively tame - hiking or something; maybe surfing. Died quickly in hospital

Therese Marquéz née Watson, 1971 - present

Resented being left behind with her grandfather (Jeremiah) or great-uncle or just nannies while he mother gallivanted around the globe, but nor did she personally enjoy gallivanting

All but refuses to carnate even a light or luck spirit

Ran away several times, permanently at age 18

Met a nice young man in police training, (him), married him quickly, had twins, happy for a while…until she got furious at him for working long hours, risking his life, not giving her the domestic bliss and picket fence life she’d imagined 

Also, he got along with her family, which she couldn’t stand

Didn’t even wait for him to come home, just left the twins with Manuel’s sister’s family and left

Has come to see them a couple times, called on birthdays usually, but in general is a mediocre person

Manuel Marquéz, 1970 - 2012

Husband of Therese

A Good Man

V aware of how the world is shitty but wanted to make it better anyway

Whirlwind romance with a beautiful but mysterious girl while he was in police training, had twins, thought he was achieving the American Dream until it turned out his wife was bristling with resentment and straight-up left one night while he was on shift

Prior to that, Jillian and Holmes randomly showed up at least once to see the twins, having heard from Marcus that they existed (the only family member Therese told; the only one she stayed in much contact with)

They got along great - he took her snappishness in stride, they shared a slightly cynical sense of humor and desire to do good nonetheless. Got talking about police investigations and procedure, he wanted to invite her back except Therese couldn’t STAND it, so they didn’t

But when he lost Therese, he reached out - because fuck you, but also, so the kids could know that side of their family, and by then Jillian had also settled down in southern CA probably? 

Dog person

Shot on the job when his kids were a year into college

David Marquéz, 1991 - present

Twin of Vanessa. Normal. Down-to-earth, B or B+ student, liked some sports, had friends, went to state college - Jillian offered to help pay for both twins, Manuel accepted bc that shit’s tough, especially two at once

Amiably disinterested in spiritual stuff - doesn’t mind, is more or less blasé about the whole Death Spirit thing - acts blase, at least; is actually kind of uncomfortable. But doesn’t want to be his mother, and so habitually doesn’t make a big deal of it, or of anything. Mediator.

Met a nice Jewish girl in college (Hannah Steinbeck) (himself tentatively, idly Catholic from the Marquéz side), dated her all through, followed her back to Boston to get a job…idk, something on computers. Coder?

Loudly insists (technically factually) that he’s the older brother, but to his credit has solid energy for it: responsible, stolid, reliable, Will fight if given cause. 

But also, DID cheerfully leave his sister to be primary local caretaker to their elderly great-grandmother and her death spirit, not long after their father’s death. Will put his hands over his ears and talk loudly while walking away from stressful situations

Strong-ish but apathetic carnator

Vanessa “Vinnie” Marquéz/Watson, 1991 - present

Bearer of Sherlock Holmes, 2019 ongoing

BSN from idk

Thinks SHE’S the responsible one, particularly after David moved to Boston

Got along well with her father; he always supported her desire to go into medicine to help people. Really looked up to him, considered that career - but he urged her to be more actively helping life than just stopping death/crime (wanted better for his kids)

Always fully aware that good cops like her dad are rare; kind of illogically despises the whole institution since his death

(WAS that, too, arranged by Moriarty? Question for another day)

Likes Great British Bake-Off but CANNOT bake; likes Project Runway and other fashion shows and does, actually, have good fashion sense (just insufficient money to fulfill it). Sews well. Talks to cloth like it’s a patient

Lesbian! 

Roommate is Darby, also a nurse, they/them. Together they’ll totally be like, *Leslie Knope voice* “Tragically, we are romantically incompatible*

First case happens literally in the apartment 3 stories down

I’m not saying she’s gonna kiss that FBI agent before it’s over but i’m sure as hell saying she’ll THINK about it

Also will get ⅔ of the way to telling Holmes to kill her and get the civilians out before backup arrives

[justicescreaming]

Mother’s Day Angst

Linda groaned and placed her hand on her back as she started to move down the stairs.  She was due three days ago and everyone was getting worried.  She had spoken to her doctor and he said he wanted to see her over the weekend if her water didn’t break before then.  Linda really hoped it would.

She frowned as she heard the sound of scurrying feet coming towards her.  “Laurel if you come running for me one more time, you’re not going to like what happens,” she warned.  “I’m pregnant not an invalid.”

“I was coming to tell you breakfast was ready,” Laurel objected.  “And the way you carry, you shouldn’t be up anyway.”

“Laurel, please don’t start,” Linda sighed.  “I just want to have some breakfast.”

“I’m just trying to help,” Laurel insisted.

Linda just brushed past her and headed to the bar where her daughter had set up breakfast for the two of them.  She eased into the booth, happily resting her back against the padded vinyl.  “Don’t pout,” she said.  “You’re not five.”

“I’m not pouting,” Laurel denied.  She sat across from her mother and they both began to eat.  “I wanted to talk to you about something.”

“All right.”

“I want to take a year off school to stay here and help you with the bar.”

“Absolutely not,” Linda said firmly.  “You’re staying until after I come home from delivery and then it’s straight back to school.  You’ve taken too much time off already.”

“Mom, you’re pregnant.”

“Really? I thought i was just getting fat from all the New Orleans food.”

“Mom, please don’t be sarcastic.”

Lind put her fork down.  “You are not staying here,” she declared.  “You’re going back to school after I deliver and that is--ow!”

“Mom?” 

Laurel quickly moved to her mother’s side but Linda waved her off.  “It wasn’t a contraction it was just some pain,” she said.  But then another shot of pain lanced through her.  “I was wrong, that’s a contraction.”  She paused.  “And that was my water breaking.”

“Oh god, you’re in labor?”

“That’s generally what happens when a woman’s water breaks,” Linda replied.  “Just stay calm and don’t panic.  I’m going to go upstairs and get my bag.  You need to get the keys to your father’s car.”

“I am in no shape to drive,” Laurel declared.  “Just as you’re in no shape to walk.  I’ll get us an Uber on my way up to get your bag.” Linda opened her mouth but Laurel gave her a look.  “No arguments mom.  You worry about the baby.”

“Trust me, he’s not giving me much choice in the matter,” she muttered.

“Just move around if you need to,” Laurel called from the stairs.  She grabbed her mother’s hospital bag while pulling up Uber on her phone.  A part of Laurel wondered if her father this anxious when her mother had been about to give birth to her.  “All right, I’ve got your bag and the Uber is on the way,” she said, taking the stairs two at a time.  How far along are the contractions?”

“I wasn’t looking at the clock,” Linda panted.  “All I know is it hurts and I want it to be over.  Sooner rather than later.”  She let out a yell.  “How long until that Uber gets here?”

“It’s gonna be soon, mama.  Just breathe.  They’ll be here soon.  I promise.”

“Get some water.  My throat is dry.”

“Okay.  Just keep walking.  Everything is okay.”  Laurel set the bag down by her mother’s feet and grabbed a bottle of water from behind the bar.  Just as she handed it to her mother, her phone buzzed.  “Okay, the Uber is ready.  Let’s go.”

They shuffled outside the Tru Tone while Linda tried to get some water.  “The fuck is going on here?” the driver demanded.

“She’s going into labor,” Laurel explained.  “We need to get to the hospital now.”  Her mother let out a yell of pain.

“FUck that.  Call an ambulance.”

“Listen to her!” Laurel insisted.  “We don’t have time for that!  Please, just get us to the hospital.  Please.  I’ll pay you double the fee.  Please.”

He rolled his eyes and sighed.  “All right, get in the back.  And if she gives birth in my car, you’re getting a one star review.”

“Just fucking drive!” Linda screamed.

“We’re out!” the driver declared.

Between her mother’s screaming, the driver’s swearing and the sound of horns as they rushed through the streets, Laurel felt a strong headache coming on by the time they got to the ER.  “Put it on the bill and I’ll pay as soon as she’s settle,” Laurel told him.  She grabbed the bag and helped her mother out of the car.  A nurse soon appeared with a wheelchair.  “We...we were having an argument and her water broke,” Laurel explained as they hurried into the ER.  The worker at the desk must have seen them because people were already flying down the hall to them.

“How far apart are the contractions?” the nurse asked.

“I didn’t time them,” Laurel admitted.  “But she’s three days overdue and allergic to the estrogen in her body.”  She reached into the bag and grabbed the medical history that was blessedly on top.  “Here.  Here’s everything.”

“Oh god,” the doctor muttered as he took the papers.  Linda let out another yell.  “She can’t deliver naturally.  Nurse, get her vitals and get her to the OR.  She needs an emergency C-section.”

The nurse parked the wheel chair as Linda stated that she was feeling dizzy.  Another nurse ushed Laurel back into the waiting room, telling her someone would be out with information as soon as possible.  Linda felt herself fading in and out.  “Linda, just breathe,” a familiar voice said.  “you’re doign so good sweetheart.”

Linda wanted to look around but they had brought her a stretcher and helped her on.  “Lie back,” the nurse said.

Linda fought slightly until she heard the voice again. “Linda, do as the nurse asks. They’re trying to help you.  Just lay back and relax.”

“Dwayne?” Yep, that was her late husband.  Looking just as he had before she lost him.  “Dwayne, what are you doing here?”

Doctors were talking but she couldn’t hear it.  Dwayne jogged along the stretcher as they rushed her to the OR.  “Just keep breathing, like you’re supposed to,” he said.  “You’re doing so good. I’m so proud of you baby.”  Linda reached out a hand but they were at hte OR now. “I’ll be waitin’ for ya, honey,” he called.  “It’s gonna be okay.  Everything will be fine.”

Then she was in the OR and someone was putting a mask over her face.  “Breathe deep.  The doctor is going to take care of everything.”

Linda blacked out and woke back up in a strange room.  “Mom?”

Laurel had been curled up in a chair but shot up as she realized her mother was awake.  “Laurel?  Laurel, what happened?  Where’s you’re father?”

“Mom, you’re in the hospital.  You just gave birth, okay?  Dad died two months ago, remember?”

“No.  No, I saw him.  I saw him as they rushed me too...” Oh god she was so tired right now.  She wanted to collapse against the pillows but adrenaline was still in her veins.

“Mom, calm down.  It was probably just some sort of fever dream.”  She hurried to her mother’s side.  “Just calm down.  You just came out of surgery.”

Thrashing around was doing her no good so she laid back against the pillows.  “Where’s my baby?” she asked.  “Can I see him?  Can I hold him?”

“yeah, yeah, of course mom.  Just rest here.”  Laurel left her mother and returned with a small bundle.  “Here he is.  A perfect baby boy.  They already ran tests and they say there’s nothing wrong with him.  Everything as it should be.”

Linda took her son from Laurel and held him in her arms.  “He’s so perfect,” seh smiled. 

“I wasn’t sure what to tell the doctors his name was.”

“Dwayne,” Linda declared.  “Dwayne King Pride.”

Laurel smiled.  “I think that’s a perfect name.”  She squeezed her mother’s shoulder.  “I’ll let the nurses know you’re awake.  I love you mom.”

“I love you too, sweetheart.”  Linda looked down at her son. “And I love you more than anything.”

@fuckerrd  @isadimeadozen

[nivks]

i feel like #followforevers and online love letters etc etc havnt really been a thing in 2018 but u know what. thats dumb. 2019 is better and were all gonna be emotional and loving towards the people that make us feel emotions speciffically - Love! so heres a #followforever emo loveletter ashdfg gahwahh OKAY EDIT: kjhsdf i finished writing this mess and its SO LONG i am SO OSRRY i cant even SPELL im so sorry whatever im gonna post it still cos maybe hopefully simething i have to say mihgt make someone smile. just skip to ur namee. happy 2019 kids! nick WILL become a dad!.

@harryfeatjack @rightgirl @happilygryles @rocketmommy @19-million-memories @drugsnotwar @ithadmefromhello @spyro2018 @acuzena @carswinky @shiftylinguini @bourgeoix @hiatusniall @julesg @itsallaboutzarry @ihavea1dbloghelp okay we might have been close but you dont post much anymore, we might be new mutuals or like?? might just have that special follow and love from afar type thing happening but you all do make my dash a happier place and i hope 2019 is incredible for u all and u are all amazing people who do brighten my day. thanks for making 2018 better!! love u. 

@chantillystars Miss Starsadrift, lover of my hart. ur so fucking BRIGHT andsweet and u always make me laugh and ur always there when im crying and u light up whatever place youre in and i know that for a fact cos when we went on holidays together you honest to god were like. the brightest and beautifulestestest in the whole street. youre also an excellent cook and the kitchen we were in was just shit. love ur snaps and msgs and how much you love gardens and flowersand sunshine. glad youve been working on feeling better about Life and its been helping cos u deserve it alllll <3<3 love u like u love yoongi. 2018 wouldve been terrible without u. @clipsandstuff your tags at times make me crack up and your love for nick is so warm and iv followed ur blog for years and youre always so consistently lovely and i hope 2019 treats u well <3 @ladsfm you barely ever have time to be on anymore but youre like. out there. living your life and i see u on instagram and ur so incredible and SMART and beaiutful and then whenever i text you a #nickupdate or more specifically a #harrynickupdate your all caps replies always make me smile so big also you are quite possibly the most lovely person iv met i lvoe you! @lordendsavior i made my url dikolasgrimshaw. for you. for me a bit too but you were that final little push. the voice of reason that said yeah! do it! thats how much i love you. akjsg anyway JOANNA you are somehow so lovely and kind but like Real at the same time and u have a way of saying your opinions that makes me wish i knew how to fucking get my thoughts out as put together? as you. idk everytime i see you like giving advice and stuff im always like YUORE SO good you really are just! so good for this world and the people you talk to. i hope everyone knows how lucky they are that gets to talk to you and stuff ily. @cashewdani your tags. iv been following your blog since like? 2013? and i have no idea what your look like and im only guessing where youre from and what youre name even is but pretty much every post you make has incredible tags and has inspired me to watch movies/tv shows that i use to skip over and you are alawys so fucking delightful to see on my dash and i feel like everytime i see you posting it brings a smile to my face. also youre writing is incredible and i feel like iv seen you posting about new jobs and new living places so i hope 2019 is super amzing for you cos you deserve it! @yourghostcat <3<3<3<3<3 gamZE you are! you ar so bright and loving and warm and sweet and gentle and FUNNY and i feel liek every single time we talk im alawys just like ‘i love you gmze’ but honselty i DO and i hope u know youre super important and im so glad i know you. every single on of youre edits are beautiful and all the work u put into them is so appreciated and ur so talented! i hope 2019 is so good to you <3 @sehunchis u barely go here anymore but im including you anyway whocares KELLY i love you. your love for vivi?? feel that. love for vivi and sehun togeth? fukcing Feel that. youre so funny and rly smart and thoughtful and u make ppl so happy by just being there and i miss being in new york with you but seeing ur tweets still makes me smile just as biggggggg lvoe you. @lollipop-popsx youre so damn funny whenever youre done with anons purposely trying to start shit but you are so so lovely to everyone else and u pretty mch always come across as genuinely happy and caring and i rly hope that you have a super amazing 2019 love uou. @fullstopmgnt again u dont go hre anymore but just in case! i LOVE you and im so GLAD ur doing better and feeling better and working on getting even better im proud of you my lovely. miss u i WILL see you soon i have gifts for youuu @meliora i was gonna say i got to hug you TWICE this year but dunkirk came out in two thousand and seventeen im a fool whatever i got to hug you ONCE this year and while thats not really a lot its still!! im so happy i got to meet u cos ur SO FUKCING lovely and beaituful and warm as a person and so chill and have such good taste in music and hair colours and i know theres been some tough times this year for you but you deserve the fucking world so i hope 2019s nothin but great stuff ILY @baaatgurl bby gir lover darling MARIE light of my life. u are! incredible and i feel like whenever we meet up im laughing and smiling constantly and even when were not together i can like. listen to audio messages u send me and even when im sad i know i got something to smile about cos ur right there! u mean a lot to me and im so so so happy we met on this dumbass website in like 2013 youre so so so important. shits been tough but 2019s gonna be The Year and 2020? were leaving australia together. @cptkirked finish the walking dead. ALJHFGLDS okay FOR REAL first of all thankyou for making me watch love actually WAIT did i tell you! when u and me watched it and my brother was like ‘that movies terrible’ HE TXT ME LIKE 2WEEKS AGO and was like ‘just rewatched love actually. i get you both now. was good movie.’ ghhhhhahh i think ur relaly great and u always make me laugh and from your tweets i feel like youve had an up and down year so i rly hope 2019s good for you in every single way cos u really deserve it. love u. @nightandstarlight milesssss we havnt talked too mcyh this year but knowin youre out there living youre life! just happy. thankyou for alays been sweet and kind and positive and making me smile. hope 2019 is beautulf for you. @plaintoast TAELOr i know 2018 has definyely had highs and lows for you but 2019 IWLL be great and u deserve honeslty SO MYCH happiness and i hope u get all of it. u are so soft and lovely i lvoe u truly. @gettingdizzy giggled when i saw your url just then dont know why. SAVANAH do u have any idea how incredble u are? ur so important and ur texts like 90% of the time make me laugh and the other 10% i wanna like fight someone on your behalf. ur smile is 100/10 and i can not wait till the day we get to MEEt. ur gonna fuckign graduate this year and finish school and 2019s really gonna be your year and i love u so mcuh. @twelvegrimmyplace LIZ! LIGHT OF MY life. u are one of hte most beautiful and funniest and ur so fucking Good and lovely and always make me smile. u also make me laugh a lot and i lvoe ur tags and ur love for nick and nick and m/esh and nick and Glasses is the reason why 2019 has to be a good year. thankyou for ebing you. love you. @erinsbreakfast cheesed real hard with my smile then as i typed your url. thankyou for always making me smile big time and making me LAUGH and thanks for loving nick the way u do. ur super sweet and super beautful and i hope 2019 is everything u dream it to be. ur incredible and i voel you. @silveredsound YOU are BEAUTUFUL and always alawys making me smile with your tags and posts and ur heavenly pictures of Harry Styles and Harry Styles’ Hair in HQ and ur thoughts about nick gshaw. thankyou for being you and i hope u know how amazing u are. i love you. happy 2019 darling. also thnakyou for the gift that was TOWEL FIC. ur a hero. and ur wrtiing is!!!!!! stuff of dreams ur so talented hoenslty @magog83 ur literally the hero that goes above and beyond for the whole nick fandom and we will never be able to thankyou enough. you are increbible and amazing and lovely and you deserve so mych happiness and good things. thaknyou for so mych youre BEAUTIFUL. @junkshop-disco every single cow i pass by in my day to day life i automtically name mabel. ur posts make me smile and ur so lovely and kind. you are so fucking talented. i hope 2019s super super lovely fro you. @kilimiria !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! mariE!!!!!!!! do u KNOw how big i smile whenever i see i have msgs from you? okay i know it takes me forever to reply a lot of the time but like literally msgs from you can turn my whole day from shit to the happiest of days. thanks for existing and being you na dmaking me smile u are sososo lovely and funny and beaitufl and i hope 2019 gives you the entire world. i lveo you. @apopstarontheradio thakns for making me smile a lot this year and being funny! and kind and lovely and having a big heart. hope 2019 beings u nothin but happiness loverlyyyy @thegreenaubergine i love YOu you make me laugh and make me smile and ur so so sweet and so lvoely i really relaly hope 2019 is great for you!!!!!! @hinickgrimshaw everytime i see u posting amd ur tags i feel like. ur just really great and amzing. sounds lame typing it out auhfhahhhhh BASICALLY everytime i see you saying things and read ur tags on nick posts im just like ‘youre SO good i trust everythignu say.’ youre so so lovely and u make me smile and im pretty sure i have a screenshot of a post u made once cos it made me smile on a bad day. anwyay i hope 2019 is GREAT for u and i think ur fucking incredible and ur love for nick is so soft. @writsgrimmyblog i smiled at your url like you could see it or someting kjhasdk WRIT u are. so organised and smart and FUNNY and beautiful and LVOELY and i am soossoso lucky to know you. youre nick thoughts and posts are a joy to read and ur writing is incredible and u made grimmy appreciation fest happen whcoh was!!!!!!! i Love you. 2019 better be the best for you <3 @fapfapfashion ayhhhh!!!!!!! ZHENya. i thnk i first saw you when u started leaving anon msgs for joanna you ARE so so so soft and kind i love you so much. you ALWAS make me laugh and you have some of the best tags and i hope everyone that knows you in real life knows how lucky they are to know youuu LOVE you a lot. hope 2019s super freakin amzing. @blueskybuzz77 youre so sweet and lovely and i hope so much good happens fro you in 2018 also u make me laigh and u deserve the WOrld LOVE you @fantofirehazard ur lovely and super sweet nad ur tags make me laugh and  i hope 2019 is increible for you because you deserve it a lot <3 

@grimshaw @brckhmptn i would die for you.

[ohhicas]

I've only been into comics for a few years, but I've read enough of the old Flash stuff where I adore the classic incarnations of the Rogues. Honestly curious here: what's it like to be a fan of James Jesse back when he was retgonned around 10 years ago and see him brought back but now all mwahaha crazy evil? I'm way more used to Axel (and all that off-panel character development in Nu52, thanks DC) but even I find this kinda weird. Was James ever crazy evil in any arc?

^- me 90% of the time someone says James is coming back to recent media & it’s not a direct continuation of the comics prior to 2004

[ Warning: this is gonna get long and be full of a lot of assumptions. I can never form solid statements and things will get jumbled, because I suck at presenting things ]

[ this is my can of worms hill and you opened it so I’m dYING HERE ]

I mean, back in the earliest ages, no Rogue had a real personality to speak of? They were just “1960s Bad Guy in a different outfit” at the very start, with quirks! Like James having a thing for toys and nuclear powered flying tricycles. It wasn’t until that era ended that they started getting real distinct and into what a lot of ‘classic’ James fans loved and appreciated? 

(I think at least, I’m just One Person here pretending like I even understand HALF of what the ‘classic’ fandom enjoyed. I’m wildly speculating just going off what fanworks I’ve seen produced.)

(I don’t have all my scans anymore but I’ll toss in scans when I have them)

But that’s when we started getting things like James actually having specified friendships with certain people

or clear distaste towards others, and when you could tell he was more of a wild card than the others. Or when he decided to fuck off and hang out in Hollywood with Blue Devil for a bit, even siding with Kid Devil to deck out Captain Boomerang. 

Or when he decided to fuck off to Gotham, to mess with Catwoman by pretending he didn’t know who she was, but absolutely knew who she was because of how she walked and carried herself, but James being James was like “mmmmm long con, nope”

hey lil Cold, gimme all ur guns and don’t question why I’m in drag xoxo

Even then, he wasn’t shown to be vicious yet! He’d hopped around various places, was still considered A Rogue, A Criminal, and as far as any comic reader could tell by trying to count up how many civilians may have been crossfired at, he had no On Purpose deaths racked? Like, the only thing you could really argue was he may have made someone drive their car off a cliff once, but I’m like 98% sure they’re fine. He’s not a murderer, he’s just here for a laugh and a long-con for funsies because he know he can get away with it!

AND THEN WE GET A LITTLE OLDER, LITTLE DARKER

[ I’M PUTTING A CUT HERE CAUSE AFTER I THREW IT INTO DRAFTS, I REALIZED I GOT REALLY LONG, I’M SORRY IF MY LAYOUT SUCKS ASS FOR THIS. ]

little more 90s Hair. Little more 90s stereotypical “But what if EVERYONE WENT TO HELL” demon plots against Satanic Hockey Hair Neron. And James? still wasn’t evil? He was a little dismissive when everyone ELSE died sure but he still in the end turned around like “nghgng I’m THE ONLY ONE”, purposely got his ass down there, regretted it, and then beat Neron at his own game to save the entire fucking world. Because! He could! And he did it so well. STILL NOT EVIL, even when he had a chance right then and there to take over everything alongside Neron should he so desire. Like, two words, maybe some under the table BJs depending on how you feel about that pairing (I don’t), and bam. He would’ve bested nearly any other villain in the DCU save like, Satan himself. Or i guess one of those world destroyers. But we’ll get back around to those BOY HOWDY WE WILL GET AROUND TO THOSE. 

So James! Saves! The world! Sorta! Later they fight Neron again and his kid he somehow had somewhere down the road (it sounds like I’m complaining, i’m not, I love Billy and Mindy both I just wish they showed up like… ever again?) and he sTILL SAVES EVERYONE. 

Piper helps by their 90s ponytails combined. 

Somewhere around here, because dates and timing aren’t my strong suit, he also goes and messes with Bart for a bit. It’s pretty much a Spy Vs Spy episode, but with less bloodshed. 

ANYWAY IT’S AFTER THIS POINT THAT THINGS GET… where I think the majority of “James is a Low Rate Joker” comes from? 

For some unknown goddamn reason, in between issues (James wasn’t a Super Frequent Rogue? He’d show up, sure, but in the huge run of the series he’d just kind of vanish for 20 issues at a time and you’d go “welp, guess he’s still alive”) James went super-cop? like, the FBI? For some reason? Hired James “I am a probably still wanted felon, a man who has escaped jail numerous times, probably never served a full sentence, known Trickster and liar” Jesse. to the FBI. And for so many issues it’s like he legit just. Did this. He threatens to shoot Piper who he was up until this very moment, considerably very close friends with (as far as comics would show Rogue/Rogue friendships), unwilling to help his friend clearly framed for murder of his parents and losing his mind by the day. Despite James talking Hart down a little on the whole ‘THE MAYOR IS ROSCOE ADN NOBODY BELIEVES MEEEEEEEE” thing. 

Also he steals Digger’s dead ass corpse? 

FBI James is a fucking enigma. Here he is standing up for Gay Rights even though Piper is like “mm maybe I should forgive my abuser??”

BUT. AFTER THIS? WE GET COUNTDOWN WHICH IS JUST. Countdown is. IT’s a problem. James’s personality is IMMEDIATELY HORRIBLY u-turned into “well we need SOMEONE to be the Bad Guy to Piper’s Good!” DESPITE. ALL THESE YEARS OF COMICS.This is the shit you’ll see people who don’t know better or just want a reason to hate the Trickster (despite being 100% okay for them to just say he’s annoying/they don’t like his tights/acrobats are stupid) reference. James is, suddenly, very abruptly, a homophobe. Like an “ew don’t touch me” level homophobe because I’m pretty sure DC snorts cocaine and threw a dart at a board for “how could they make these two fight” and landed on GAY RIGHTS IS TRENDING. 

BUTSTILL IN THE FUCKING END OF ALL OF THIS?After so many issues of James being a complete fuckass prick? 

springboards himself from his current job of being railroad face putty to catching bullets to make sure Piper wasn’t gonna die. Without knowing the proceedings of this entire plotline, James out of nowhere after so much gaybashing, still finds it in him to leap into the path of multiple bullets and save Piper. Because, yknow, he’s evil!

Later it’s shown he’s been working to take everyone down (y’know, like when he was in the FBI) and left Piper specific helpful notes to do it himself. Because Evil Bad Guy! Helping his gone-good friend! Take down bad guys! 

DC I STILL HAVE SO MANY GODDMAN QUESTOINgsd

But yeah that’s. That’s where we last saw James. in 2007, dead, after saving Piper when he could have easily pulled a Joker and ripped HIM down to take hte bullets and etcetc, y’know. Something a Very Bad Person would’ve done, like the characterization we’ve seen now. 

His ghost (easily argued as Piper’s own mental construction of James sassing him) sasses Hartley to even, in his mental state, saw off James’s hand so Piper doesn’t have to lug his weight around and has a fighting chance at living. And in the end, when Piper’s fighting the thing that can destroy the fucking world, it’s shown only Piper was the one who could save them? Because his flute, and his musical ability, and [enter DC comic science here]. You could argue this was James, once again, somehow knowing the long-con at play here, getting screwed over at EVERY turn, and sacrificing himself so they ‘good’ team had a fighting chance.You could also argue this is me losing my mind trying to make sense of the things they made James do. (my running argument is he was purposely a prick to push Piper away, so he could keep him safe) 

Also Piper plays James a Swan Song of Queen as the final boss explodes and he’s fully prepared to die. So like. There’s that. 

AND THATS BASICALLY THE COMICS? The main, ‘canon timeline’ comics. I’m missing a LOT of little things here and there, but I’m not missing anything like body counts, or murder attempts, beyond the old Silver Age “Bad guy of the week” things like trying to make Flash’s head explode, or you know. Other “nobody really has a personality, we just have quirks”. 

MY NUMBER ONE GUESS TO WHERE THIS NEW PERSONALITY TREND COMES FROM?

Mark Hamil|’s OG run as him in the old live action show. That characterization was fun, for the time, and I even enjoyed it cause it was just that off the wall and you could tell it was what they used to decide he should be the Joker for the BATS Joker. Consider it a prototype (combined with all the previous comic jokers but that’s not for this long ass post) 

And if it’d stayed there, that’d be it! That’s it! But then JLU came along, and they referenced the old show for their version of James with a sprinkling of early-era comics, and a lot of people loved and watched that show. That was their version of the Trickster, because it was their first meeting with him! And I can’t fault that! But that guy was clearly off his rocker and I’m sure if the JLU allowed a higher rating, it would’ve been even closer to the old TV show. 

And both of THOSE were heavily, heavily referenced for the CW version, which as I’m at this point now means I need to slap my usual anti-CW tag onto things. I hate the CW James. There is so little comic in him it’s almost disgusting, and they ramped up so much of the Joker side of JLU & OGTV he might as well just be the Joker. It’s not a good representation of him at all. I have, also, only seen his first appearance episode, so maybe I’m wrong? But when you fuck up hard on the first run, why would I return for round 2? 

So with ALL THIS– 

REBOOT TIME. Whatever the newnew remake is calling itself. 

At first! With how James was! In the first panel flash of him clearly behind the scenes tugging so many wires and lines, watching everything with a bucket of popcorn while pulling others to his side, sitting pretty in an old museum? warehouse? highlighted in purples and vintage toys, I was like “holy shit this it. This is My Boy, back from the goddamn limbo-dead. It’s him.” But then“taking over the city entirely” to do? What? Turn it into the world’s biggest Trickster themepark? Make everyone wear striped leggings and combat boots? Martial Law of murder if you don’t carry rubber chickens? This is already veering from anything major James has ever done. As it stands I can’t see the gag here. Its’ weirdly dark and edgy, and way too close to something we saw the 90s TV show Trickster do, in the episode where he basically took over the place. The previews show him being what I’m assuming a Judge, Jury, & Executioner joke– and unless this spins into a Clopin song and dance number and his little hand puppet crops up to slam the button on the guillotine, I’m not having it, DC. 

They’re trying to tie him back into the CW, despite the writer saying he really enjoyed the Neron-era things with James (if I’m remembering the interview correctly). And it’s also why you may see me constantly saying “Well I sure as fuck hope Neron shows up” at anything new that’s released, to explain away all of… this.

This isn’t him. If they wanted a murderous Trickster, they should’ve just used Axel. The kid, canonly, tied explosives to stray dogs and homeless people. AXEL is the not-good Trickster, the murderous Trickster, the one you aren’t suppose to feel sorry for beyond being in way over his head due to his young age. 

i think I somehow didn’t answer your question

TL;DR

it sucks? it’s also great because there’s a .5% chance that maybe they’ll do it right and won’t reference the fucking 90s noncomic media. But then they do. And all I can do is laugh and shrug like ‘welp I expected nothing’. But when they get it RIGHT it’s like christmas came early.