#when you cannot remember anything about your past and are expected to simply start over and let yourself
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texeoghea · 2 years ago
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btw i have not posted art in a few days bc again we are in the process of moving i dont always have time to draw but i feel like my brain is going to explode with the amount of ideas i have that i cannot for some reason talk about. at all times i am thinking abt a hundred things and i post about one of them maybe sometimes. youll never know about the incredibly in depth persona 5 destiny au that has been forming in my brain for the last three weeks
#not art#albeit i have not caught up in destiny in like a fucking year. my knowledge of it spans from#red war to beyond light. anything before or after that i dont really know and i didnt really pay attention to some of the seasons#like arrivals and uhh the caiatl introduction one. sorry im just invested in the eliksni mostly. but like#a lot of the lore and concepts of the destiny world drive me insane i am so deeply in love with the idea#of guardians and light and darkness and what it means to be chosen by a god and the question of identity#when you cannot remember anything about your past and are expected to simply start over and let yourself#become something completely new. some kind of perfect living weapon of destruction for a wordless faceless god#that eternal question of who is that under the mask. who are you when you have nothing. when your light is destroyed#what makes a guardian. what does that mean. what happens when you take that away#what parts of you are ingrained so deeply that you have kept those traits through death and amnesia#and what parts of you are so different as to be unrecognizable because of the way you live now#what does free will mean when you exist at the whims of a higher power. when your life was picked at random#DESTINY IS SO AWESOME CONCEPTUALLY IT SUCKS THAT ITS PAY TO PLAY AND DOESNT REALLY WELCOME NEW PLAYERS#AND THAT SO SO SO MUCH CONTENT YEARS WORTH OF CONTENT AND LORE HAS BEEN SUNSET#AND IS NOW PRETTY MUCH IMPOSSIBLE TO ACCESS AND YOUD JUST HAVE TO READ ABOUT IT THROUGH OLD LORE ENTRIES AND POSTS#AND EXTRAPOLATE FROM CUTSCENES WHATS GOING ON. DESTINY IS GREAT. ID LOVE TO PLAY AND ENJOY IT#sorry i like somehow really deeply imprinted on this space shooter game back in 2020 somethings wrong with me
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goldsbitch · 7 months ago
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can I request a Lando x reader where the reader’s weakness is when people stroke her hair? Her mind goes completely blank and she falls silent immediately when people stroke her hair and Lando uses it at his advantage.
Fluffy pls and ty🫶🏻
omg, i love this prompt so much - thank you and hope you like it!!
This is one is dripping with sweetness a little too much, don't say I did not warn you. No other warning.
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Lando was born a tease, oscillating between clueless and shy, to unapologetic and bordeline dickish. It all depended on the setting, his relationship to the person and how much sleep he got the night before. Sometimes your boyfriend was the sweetest little thing, giggling shyly about everything instead of coming up with an actual response, and the other times he was a walking menace actively seeking every opportunity how to get you into a flustered state.
You and Lando were full on deep in the beginning of your relationship, the sweetest part of the honeymoon phase. To put it bluntly - fucking almost non stop. And the desire was never-ending. Blinding sunshine kissed good morning to every day you two got to wake up next to each other. Problems seem to be non existent. Bliss.
It was the way his hair curled when he got a little bit sweaty, his toned body what you were desperate to explore from every angle and the need to know every little secret trick that worked on him. It became some sort of a game, who would get better at knowing the other. Which one of you found all the buttons to push.
Lando rose up that morning and chose violence. Metaphorical one, of course. Snuggling up to you in order to wake you up as well for some morning work out, as he like to call it. Whispering sweet nothings to your ear and touching you all over your body. But you were just incredibly sore from the past few days, physically unable to keep up.
"Why don't you love me anymore," he pleaded jokingly as you murmured another weak appeal for your sleep.
"Lando, you know I love you more than anything," you replied, still half asleep. But it was hard to distinguish as reality resembled a sweet dream everyday lately.
"I remember when you used to want me, physically," he kept going.
"We literally had sex few hours ago, stop whining," you kissed him between your words. He looked at you with his incredible eyes, little devil dancing in each one of them.
"Exactly, too long ago. Wish I could go back in time when you were not sore and get inside you all over again."
You simply laughed, absolutely smitten with this lovey dovey side of him. His words made you melt like butter sitting under direct sun. You brushed your noses together and then he kissed you.
The best part of romantic relationships is the one that you cannot absolutely share with other people, the almost embarrassing pleas, desire and gross goofiness, simping at each other all the time.
"Fine, if you play by these rules, I'll come back with my own revenge," he said finally as you inevitably had to start getting ready to go to the paddock with him.
Today was the big day. You'd been spotted in public countless of times, the "girlfriend" title officially sitting on your head for weeks now. But this was the first time you were to join him in the paddock as a wag. You were trying to hide your nervousness, but he saw right through you. Before you exited the apartment, he made you stop and took your face in his hands. "I'm happy I get to do this with you. I love parading you around, for everyone to see that we're a team." You smiled, his words hitting like first snowflakes of the year. "Poor Oscar, I can't wait to finally trauma dump the shared misery you bring to our lives," you jokes and locked lips with him once again. "God, it's terrifying how much I like you," you said automatically, without having to think about it.
//
It actually wasn't as bad as you'd expected. It was definitely weird and strange, but not necessarily bad. Having Lando by your side as you passed the gates definitely helped. The photographers were lined up as people at a shooting range would and it did feel like that at first. But as quickly as you were initially overwhelmed, fatigue took over you and you blocked their ever-presence out. Trying to chat up those Lando introduce you to and memorizing the names. You knew how much some of these people meant to Lando, so you were trying to be at your best behavior. The thought that his friends would hate you in the same way as some of his fans haunted you.
In the middle of all the rush, you parted for a moment. To be honest, little peace of quiet and chill was something you appreciated. But remember, Lando woke up and chose violence this morning. And his plan was quite simple, yet bulletproof.
"Y/N! There you are, my love," you heard from coming from behind you. "I have someone to introduce to you! I'm very much sure you'll appreciate meeting him." As you turned, you saw Daniel Ricciardo walking your way with your Lando. You were a little perplexed as to why Lando was so cheerful about that. You clearly remembered him getting very upset when you admitted to him that at some point in the past, when formula 1 was a world far away from you, that you had a minor crush on Daniel. Which obviously went out of the window once you met Lando. That did not mean that Lando was 100% ok with it.
"Y/N, as I'm sure you know, this is Daniel, hell of a driver and good friend of mine," Lando continued and you knew him well enough to know he had ulterior motives. Not sure what to do, you smiles shyly and shook Daniel's hand.
"Hi, Daniel," you said, eyes flinching between him and Lando. You were full on preparing for anything. Lando's smirk almost had a life of his own at that point.
"Nice to finally meet you, Y/N. I've heard quite a lot things about you!" Daniel opened, life of the party as per usual.
You chuckled. "All good things, I hope!" And with that, Lando stepped behind you and put his arm around you.
"Only the best," he said, leaned closed and inconspicuously started to stroke you hair gently. Oh, he did not just go this low.
It was slow, yet like tidal wave. You stopped breathing for a moment. Your body relaxing, as if you'd just taken the world's best sedatives. The way his hands made you feel was etherial. It was the same sensation the luckier ones experienced when listening to ASMR and the less fortunate ones sometimes called an orgasm. Shivers slowly traveling around your whole body, every part becoming sensitive out of nowhere. You weren't able to look at Daniel, let alone continue speaking. Lando was more than aware of what touching your hair did to you. He'd discovered this trick quite early on. And it was his favorite one.
"So, where are you from?" Daniel attempted at small talk. But how could you possibly give a fuck at that moment. Not that your body would even allowed you to respond. The only thing you were able to take in from the outside world were the soft slow movements Lando's fingers were doing, blocking everything out instanteniously.
Daniel stared at you, waiting. From his perspective, this was a very awkward meeting.
Lando answered for you, with a smirk you did not see, but could feel from the tone of his voice. "You have to excuse her, she is bit shy in front of new people."
You could not give less of a fuck at that moment of what these two were saying. Your lips were starting to shiver from getting so sensitive. You took a short breath and someone who would be standing close and knew you well would know, that what escaped your mouth was not a nervous laugh, but something very close to a moan.
Lando and Daniel were saying words, but none of that was important, while Lando's fingers were working his magic. He would only leave your hair alone once he saw Daniel leaving.
You wanted to be mad at him. But you were still sort of high from all the sensation bomb Lando dropped on you. You slowly turned around to face him, coming down from your own personal nirvana.
You took a deep breath while he watched you without a blink and biting hims smile away.
"You promised," you let out air that got stuck in your lungs somewhere along the way. "You promised you would not do this in public." Your brain was slowly wiring up to normal again.
"I told you I'd punish you for the morning," he said as if it was the most amusing thing ever. "Also, if Daniel is my competition, I'm going to use all the advantage I have."
Lando had a way of looking at you that made you unravel instantaneously and there was no way of stopping it. There was just something about his smile that did it for you. As anyone who is properly in love, you could not imagine somebody being able tor resist that. In your love soaked mind, he was irresistible. To a normal mind, he was probably just a regular guy, but that idea was unfathomable to you.
"I'm pretty sure that after what I just pulled, you will not have to worry about Daniel liking me," you chuckled, having to accept that Lando won this one.
"I would never let my guard down...But yeah, I think this one is pretty safe," he chuckled once more. You kissed his overly proud face and promised to yourself to get back at him later, in the privacy of his bedroom.
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tinfoil-jones · 8 days ago
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Gravity Falls: For Your Own Good, Ch. 6
Summary: A few years after moving to Gravity Falls and having his lab built, Stanford Pines happens upon his estranged twin brother, Stanley. He mentally prepared himself to be suffocated by his brothers neediness all over again - what he wasn't prepared for was Stanley walking right past him like he didn't even notice him.
Rating: M for language, violence, and adult implications
Preface: Dialogue only, but some actions will be annotated for clarity. Cross-Posted on AO3 Here
First - Prev - Next
CH.6
“Good evening, Stanley.”
“...”
“I can see in lieu of speaking, you have instead chosen to communicate with an obscene hand gesture- two obscene hand gestures. I'll excuse your immaturity because I understand you might be feeling… upset.”
“Upset? Me? What could I possibly be upset about?”
“I understand your current state of… lodging is making you apprehensive. On account of being involuntarily committed.”
“You not picking up sarcasm doesn’t surprise me. And this isn’t an involuntary commitment; this is an unlawful abduction and confinement. I have enough experience with both to know the difference.”
“You what?”
“Ask me whatever stupid questions you’re about to ask, but I refuse to stand up. This is literally the first bed I’ve had since prison; and in that bed I had to worry about bed bugs, dirty needles, poisonous snakes… and Jorge.”
“What was that last thing that you just whispered to yourself?”
“Don’t worry about it. Now, what do you want, Doc? You here to scan me again? Get me to take more drugs? Ask me weirdly personal questions like your hot friend?”
“I want to talk. I may have come on a little strong when we crossed paths in town, in order for you to truly understand where I’m coming from, I’m going to have to give you some context in place of your lost memory.”
“Please tell me you’re not about to give me the tragic backstory of you and your missing twin.”
“Listen, Stanley, you don’t remember this; but we had a falling out ten years ago.”
“Aaand you’re doing it. Yeah, that’s pretty much what I was expecting. Fine, I’ll play along.”
“We were in our senior year of high school. You ruined a project of mine, and it cost me my dream college. We had a fight, and you got- you left home after that.”
“Man, dunno why I’d do something like that.”
“You were scared of me leaving you.”
“Did a shitty thing, and ended up alone anyways. That's something I'd expect from me.”
“And then you tried to justify it and say there was a silver lining-.”
“I’m sorry.”
“...What?”
“I’m sorry. You didn’t deserve that.”
“... Where’s your excuse?”
“Hm?”
“Your excuses- your reasons? You cannot just apologize- so casually.”
“Sure I can. I just did. You don't accept it, that’s your right."
“...You don’t mean that.”
“Naw, I’m pretty sure no one deserves to be betrayed. I’m sorry you were.”
“Saying sorry doesn’t make it okay.”
“Didn’t say it did. Nothing can- it’s already happened, and there’s no changing it. You don’t wanna forgive and forget? I won’t make you.”
“And you’re going to simply… move on?”
“Look, PhD, I can’t tell you why your real twin did what he did, or what was going through his head when he did it. But he did the wrong thing to the wrong person, and paid for it. It’s too bad you had to pay for it too.”
“You are-.”
“Can see why you’d get us mixed up though. All I do is ruin things, too. Maybe if that thing with your project hadn’t happened, you wouldn’t be a wackjob who carries a tranq gun with him everywhere and abducts people off of the street.”
“I’m not mixing anything up. You are exactly who I keep trying to tell you that you are. You’re just not you right now.”
“I’m never anybody but me. You feel better now? Get all of that out of your system?”
“Now that I have told you what separated us-.”
“I’m gonna take that as a no.”
“Can you fill me in on the years that followed?”
“Doc, a lot of what I remember is like smoke - it’s hazy, and it’s hard to hold onto, can you be specific?”
“How about we start with something tangible?”
“Like what?”
“I am going to slip a paper and a pen through the slot in the door. Write down a list of the people who’ve tried to kill you.”
“You sure?”
“Yes. You told my associate a number of alarming things during his interview with you, and he reported that a not insignificant number of those things revolved around people trying to kill you.”
“A lot of them still want me dead, you know. If they figured out where I was, they might raid this place. It’s not too late to just… let me go, and we can pretend none of this happened. I’m not gonna hold a grudge against you, it's clear to me you've got issues because your real twin is either dead or hiding in Cuba.”
“They can try. They’ll fail.”
"Gutsy. We coulda been friends if you weren't insane."
"...We were."
"If you say so."
To be continued...
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kfkr1ze · 4 months ago
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[002-A15] Nearly Space Monkeys[3]
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Summary — ✈︎ Kiroku is in charge of making the lanterns for the summer festival, but he’s struggling with coming up with the designs. Then, he remembers something from the past.
Characters— ✈︎ Kiroku
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Location: The Island Atelier in Shodoshima
Kiroku: ………
……… Sighs.
Dewawa: Hey, Kiroku?
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Dewawa: The hell have you been doing this whole time? Are you just gonna keep staring at a white lantern with that gloomy expression stuck on your face?
It’s been over an hour already and you still haven’t drawn anything yet. You’re not some guy who has all the time in the world, are you? Hurry up and start drawing already.
Kiroku: ……Dewawa.
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Rouzel: Hey, you! Shut up![1]
Kiroku just needs time to start gathering power to create beautiful art from now on!
Don’t distract him with unnecessary words.
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KB: It would be easy to allow myself to remain silent and simply watch as you work. But, it would be impossible to do so when your face is wrinkling from how hard you are furrowing your eyebrows, Kiroku.
Kiroku, are you still having trouble with this task?
Kiroku: ……………
Dewawa: Hah? Are you pushing yourself to do this? 
Y’know that we’re trying to help you, don’t you?
Rouzel: No! He doesn’t need anyone to force him to do anything he doesn’t want to. No thanks! Kiroku just needs to do things at his own pace!
KB: If you would like to remain silent, then so be it. 
However, I have reason to believe that letting the time pass aimlessly is not a scenario that would be beneficial to Kiroku eitherーー.
Kiroku: ……Sighs. KB is right.
…………
…… Yes, come in.
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Gannosuke: Excuse me! I was wondering how the work was coming along. I also brought a bento for youーー
…… It seems that there has been no progress yet.
Kiroku: ……… Yes.
Gannosuke: And there’s that look on your face as well. I can see it’s pretty painful for you. 
Kiroku: ………
Gannosuke: I’m also involved in the world of the arts, so I understand that pain all too well. The pain that comes with creation has always existed. 
The desire to make something groundbreaking, innovative, and new… For me, I want to design eyelashes that soothe the hearts of those who see them. When you have that kind of spiritーー
The more you ponder the ideas that flood in your head, the more your hands stop moving.
Then there are all the days where you can’t think of a single idea… Those days make you feel like you’re at a complete loss.
Kiroku: ………
Gannosuke: But, even though it’s painful, we should still let those ideas stew in our heads! Without suffering, great art cannot be created!
…Do your best. Please excuse me.
Kiroku: …… Thank you… very………
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Pinfu: Oh wow〜 Just look at this bento〜! It looks sooo good〜! There’s so much tsukudani in it too〜!Let’s hurry up and eat it〜!
Kiroku: ………
KB: It is certainly a high quality bento. It would not be an exaggeration to say it is akin to a treasure box filled with local specialties. However, you should wait before you put your hands in it. 
Pinfu: Weeh〜… I guess we’ll just have to wait〜…
Dewawa: I mean, what’s there for you to worry about? Can’t you do what you usually do and just draw whatever the fuck you want?
Rouzel: It’s not as easy as you say it is.
Like yesterday! Mister Akuta said he was looking forward to Kiroku’s work!
Pinfu: Gyaha! The pressure is super super suuuuper high isn’t it〜?
KB: Correct. To add onto that, these lanterns are the ones that are intended to be used for the show as well.
Pinfu: Isn’t it super old school〜? If you mess it up, there’s no do overs〜
Dewawa: Kinda like human relationships?
Kiroku: …… Yeah.
…… In human relationships……there are no… do overs.
Rouzel: For Kiroku, you just want to show your wonderful pictures to Mister Akuta since he liked them so much!
Kiroku: ……But, the things that I like…… are weird.
…… The things I like…… are different… from what normal people like.
KB: He has high expectations of you now, but eventually the time will come when you start to reveal your own likes and preferencesーー
Dewawa: And when that comes, you don’t want to be rejected by Akuta, right?
Kiroku: ………
Dewawa: The hell’s up with that? That’s so fucking lame! Who cares!
Rouzel: I can understand your feelings, Kiroku!
KB: Indeed, it’s natural for people to want to be liked by those around them. 
… That is what I intended to say.
Pinfu: But I’m soooo hungry〜 Can we eat already〜? You have to at some point〜
Kiroku: ………
Sighs……
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Gannosuke: … Oh, it’s pitch black in here. I guess Kinugawa-kun really did return home after all……
Kiroku: ………
Gannosuke: OUUUUUGH! Y-You surprised me…! What were you doing without the lights on in here…!?
Kiroku: ………
Gannosuke: … Don’t tell me you seriously stayed in that spot the entire time? Oh, but you did eat the bento though…
Kiroku: …… Yes.
Gannosuke: Forcing yourself to stay cooped up in here will only have the opposite effect… Is what I would like to say, but it’s true that there is not much time until the day of the summer festival.
Kiroku: ………I’ll…
…… I’ll stay… overnight……
Gannosuke: There shouldn’t be any issues there. I trust that you can prepare your own meals, correct?
Kiroku: …… Yes.
Gannosuke: Very well. Then, good luck. I’m looking forward to your work.
Kiroku: ………
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Ripris: He’s looking forward to it~ … But, Sen...pai[2]… ZZZ.
Kiroku: ………
Ripris: I’m sure you… feel flattered about that… but it’s getting late…
Why don’t you… just go to bed… today…?
You can just… do your best from tomorrow on… so it’ll be okay… If you do it right… you can probably get this finished… in just a few hours…
Kiroku: ……No, I can’t.
Ripris: … Why not…?
There’s no point… into putting in your all…
When you worked really hard… on the art you drew on the blackboards in the old building… It all just… exploded… into pieces…
Kiroku: ………
Dewawa: Are you seriously upset about that? I thought you wanted to draw without worrying about people staring at you?
That’s why you went all the way to the old building. ‘Cuz if anyone saw you, it’d be “the end of the world〜” right?
Cuz the truth is, if people knew you loved to draw art like this, they’d probably say the same thing they said last time, right?
Pinfu: Gyahahaha! There he goes again! That’s sooo mean〜!
Kiroku: ………
KB: Are you referring to that time his one and only best friend broke his heart?
That is a matter that is still wrapped up around Kiroku’s heart, deep within his chestーー It is something that is still not yet resolved. 
Rouzel: Everyone! It’s not good to make Kiroku relive his trauma like that!
It’s true that Kiroku’s best friend referred his very nice pictures as “creepy pieces of art”~
But! Those words were just fighting words they were using as a response! 
I’m sure it was something they just said impulsively!
Pinfu: Exactly~ I mean, it was Kiroku’s fault in the first place y’know~? He was the one who started saying insensitive things when his friend was upset about having to transfer schools~
Kiroku: ………
Ripris: But but… Saying that his drawings were “creepy” in response … that’s just mean…… ZZZ.
Kiroku was drawing that picture… for them in the first place…
… But, it doesn’t matter… now…
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KB: He was the one who hurt them first. He brought this on himself. I am sure that Kiroku understands that as well.
Kiroku: ……Yeah.
……I’m not in a place… where I can say things like that… to other people……
………… Words are… scary……
Dewawa: Aren’t you just a coward?
Kiroku: …………
Sighs……
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Kaede: Kiroku-kun, are you okay?
Kiroku: !?
Pinfu: Oh my oh my oh my〜?
Do you think he caught Kiroku talking to us?
KB: How will you disguise us, Kiroku?
Dewawa: Won’t this be interesting?
Kaede: Umm, those finger puppets…
Kiroku: T-These are…… Non-slip finger sleeves… for wor…k……
Kaede: I see. Those are cute sleeves.
… By the way, are you hungry?
Gannosuke-san called me. He was worried that you probably haven’t even had dinner yet.
Kiroku: ………
Kaede: I made some onigiri and miso soup. If you want, you can eat some.
Kiroku: …………
Kaede: Thenーー After we finish eating, do you wanna go somewhere for a bit?
Kiroku: …… Where?
Kaede: A youkai art museum! 
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Location: Youkai Art Museum in Shodoshima
Kaede: Isn’t it interesting? The art museum is inside of Maze town. They built an art museum in the middle of the confusing alleyways.
Kiroku: …… This is…… the 4th one……?
Kaede: Yeah! The museum is divided into four different structures.
Apparently, back when pirates used to come to the island, the locals created a layout of deliberately complicated streets and alleys in order to protect the town. This museum was created using some of the old buildings that were left!
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Kiroku: ………
Kaede: (His eyes are sparkling… I’m glad I decided to bring him…
I hope it’s a nice change of pace for him. It’d be nice if he can get some inspiration from this.)
I’m sure you’ll want to take your time and explore around by yourself. Let’s decide on a meeting place so you can spend the rest of the afternoon on your own!
Kiroku: ……Okay.
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Kiroku: …………
Kiroku: ( …… Everything looks so interesting. I don’t think I can get tired from seeing them. I want to see more……)
………?
Signboard in the portrait corner: “We’ll draw a portrait of the youkai that lives inside your heart.”
Kiroku: ……The youkai… that lives…… inside your heart……
( I might be able to find some kind of hint… from this)
Staff: Good afternoon! Are you interested in getting one?
Kiroku: Uh……!
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Kiroku: ( …… That… scared me.)
(I should’ve just… replied…)
( ……? Something is moving on my back… Is it my bookbag…?)
( Is it… the egg?)
Ah……
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Kiroku: …… Eh……?
Previous — ✈︎ Masterlist — ✈︎ Next
Notes — ✈︎
About Rouzel, he talks like half the time in English. I decided to just italicize the words he says in English. Also his words are in yellow but Tumblr doesn’t let me do custom colors so … I’m sorry he’s just gonna be orange on here (・.・;) 
Ripris calls Kiroku "Senpai". He’s not talking about Gannosuke here.
( Decided to put this at the end since it's a long one.) I'm not sure what space monkeys is supposed to be referring to. I believe it could be referring to the movie / novel Fight Club. I haven't watched or read this, so my knowledge is limited to searches I have about it. The space monkeys in that novel are also a reference to the space monkeys / other animals sent to space, but in Fight Club, they are referencing a group of people following one man. I'm not sure which meaning 18trip intended it to represent, though. Space monkeys in Fight Club could represent the lack of control people have over their lives. Space monkeys would act without understanding why. They just do their job and blindly follow orders, leading to a pointless existence. But there's a different interpretation that instead of leading a pointless life, space monkeys are working towards a shared goal that gives them happiness. Instead of blindly working for no purpose, now they are blindly working towards a goal. So "nearly space monkeys" would mean that it didn't happen yet, or almost happened and it didn't. Idk man I'm trying to make it make sense.
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mystar-girl57 · 2 years ago
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“Us against the world.”
Neteyam x Reader
Summary: With you and Neteyam finally coming of age and being seen as adults to your clan having completed your inkinmaya, you learn of the new responiblies that come with it. The two of you start to grow apart, being so caught up on your tasks. One day Neteyam is granted a break and the two of your are able to escape for some time. But we all know that paradise cannot last forever.
Warnings: Overworked Neteyam, mentions of struggling/ranting, implied character death at the end, let me know if i missed anything.
Category: Fluff to Angst
Dictionary: yawne: beloved || Oel ngati kameie: I see you
Wc: 2.1k
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These past few moons have been a whirlwind for you and Neteyam to say the least. With two of you completing your ikinmaya and now being recognized as adults there were now responsibilities to carry out. Jake was often taking Neteyam around camp and outside to the forest, giving him teachings on how to be a strong and proper Olo'eyktan. What to do to keep peace, how to keep The People safe, especially with the Sky People returning, all of this and more. You on the other hand were being torn all over the place trying to figure out what your purpose was.
You were either with Mo’at and Kiri, working with the herbs and ointments, how to perfect your remedies, be in touch with Eywa. Or you were trailing behind Neytiri and the other warriors of the clan, huntings for food, scouting for Sky People and their Recom Avatars that could be prowling around your home. “All the training you can get is good.” Your father would remind you should he ever hear your complaints about exhaustion or how annoyed you were with all that The People expected of you. But the one thing that seemed to bug you the most, and Neteyam too was how far apart you had gotten. Would you ever be as close as you use to be when you were just babes? Or had that friend ship crumbled and turned to ash?
==========
“Neteyam. Neteyam!” The boy’s head snapped back up, his attention returning to his father who stood with his arms crossed in front of his chest while his tail flicked with annoyance. “Boy, are you listening to me? You’ve been zoned out staring at that blade of grass for the last ten minutes.” Jake scolded. Neteyam instantly broke his father’s gaze and looked down at his hands that were picking at some grass. “Sorry Sir.” He apologized, his voice holding its usual meek demeanor to it when confronting his father. Jake ran a hand across his face and let out a sharp sigh. “What’s going on? You’re obviously distracted so come on out with it.”
Neteyam shook his head, unsure what to say. He did not know why he had been so disconnected as of late, usually he was in tune with his father’s teaching, soaking up every word the Olo'eyktan had to say. Neteyam was hungry to learn he truly was, but he was finding it difficult as of late to focus. “I don’t know sir.” He responded honestly, turning back up to Jake. “I’m just finding it hard to concentrate, I guess it might be because I haven't had a break from your teachings in so long?”
Neteyam watched as his father’s expression changed just barely leaning to a frown and instantly the eldest Sully son wanted to take back what he said. “But its not an excuse sir I know. I’ll do better to concentrate.” He added but Jake shook his head raising his hand for his son to stop speaking. “No you’re right son, you’re right.” Jake sighed, remembering his wife’s words of ‘Let them be kids’ “We haven’t had a break from this in a while, why don’t you take the day or something. Go for a fly, be back before eclipse.”
The Sully boy could not believe his ears at what his father was saying. Never once had the stone hard Marine suggested his son to take a break, be a kid. He figured that his mom must have said something. But despite this, Neteyam was hesitant to leave, wondering if there was a catch but Jake simply gave him a pat on the back and a gentle nudge toward camp.
==========
When Neteyam arrived at High Camp his first mission was to find you. Oh how it had
been so long that you and the teen had just said ‘hi’, let alone see each other but Neteyam marked it off as one of the sacrifices he had to make as the clan’s future Olo'eyktan.
Thankfully, finding you proved to be easy as today was one of the days that you stayed in camp helping Mo’at and Kiri. The moment that Neteyam peeked into the tent and sat you sitting there with your tail tucked around you, gossiping with his little sister whilst grinding something up in the mortar with your pestle he felt at ease. Neteyam cleared his throat while he stepped into the tent getting yours and Kiri's attention. “Well hello there stranger, remember we exist?” Kiri instantly teased, rising to her feet to hug her brother. Neteyam rolled his eyes, looping his arms around his sister’s waist. “Forgive me, I was kept away, busy with more important tasks.” He teased back, Kiri giving him a look of mock offense.
You couldn’t help but giggle at the sibling’s interaction. The sound of your laugh brought Neteyam back and he remembered why he was here. “Kiri, do you think you could spare y/n for the afternoon?” His sister made it look as though she was thinking as she pulled away from him and made her way over to you. “Oh I don't know,” Kiri looked down at you from where you sat then back to Neteyam, “maybe.” Neteyam raised a brow, neither understanding or apperacting his sister’s antics. On any other day maybe he’d have more patience but he was desperate to spend time with you. “Kiri.” He sighed using what his siblings teased him in calling his: Olo’eyktan tone. “Oh fine!” Kiri put her hands up, “But really it’s up to y/n if they want to go.”
Neteyam’s eyes fell on you, silently asking what your choice was and you nodded with a grin. “Give me a few moments to clean up and I’ll come join you.” At your words, the boy couldn’t help but let his teeth and canines show as a smile grew on his face. With a quick nod (and Kiri shooing him out) Neteyam left the tent to call his ikran. As the magnificent creature came swooping down, landing in front of him, a familiar chirp caught his ears causing them to perk up and Neteyam didn’t need to turn around to know it was you calling your own companion.
“You forgot your visor skxawng.” You teased, petting your ikran when she landed in front of you. “Hard for me to remember when you always bring it.” Neteyam snarked right back as he took the visor from your hand and slipped it onto his forehead. “I depend on you.” “Oh trust me,” You smirked, gracefully hoping up onto your ikran and tipping down the visor, “I know.”
And with that, your ikran rose up to its feet before tipping and falling backward. The two of you free fell in the air for a good ten seconds before flipping over and flying forward, Neteyam in your wake.
==========
The two of you lost track of time while flying. You had no set course, you just followed the sun while swooping around, diving and chasing each other. It was times like this that were most dear to you. Both you and Neteyam knew that these outings were going to become more and more rare but whenever the teen boy was with you he felt like he could be himself. He didn’t care how cliche it sounded. Neteyam knew that whenever you were near he could let his guard down, drop the Olo'eyktan act and just be a kid.
“Should we land for a moment and rest?” Neteyam called out to you, watching you race a head, dive down and come up by him. “One of these mountains should have a good water spot.” He suggested once you were side by side. “Lead the way Mr. Olo'eyktan.” You grinned. Neteyam rolled his eyes at the nickname, “I told you not to call me that.” He grumbled, ears down in annoyance but you just kept grinning all the same. Nothing could deter you when you were with him. You could be as silly and goofy as you wanted with Neteyam and he would just laugh and shake his head. No judgment or scoldings came from him when you were yourself.
The two of you while close in age and sharing similar interests were night and day in comparison when you were acting like yourselves. Neteyam was very calm and collected, having a good laugh every now and then. He made sure to be more cautious, the look before jumping type. You however would take the plunge without a second thought. Who cares if there are rocks at the bottom? You would deal with it later. Any time that you would you loved to let loose and dance and flip about. You were the sun and Neteyam was your moon, feeding off your light and energy, keeping him going.
==========
“This seems like a good spot,” You announced as your ikran touched down on the green grass, Neteyam’s landing next to yours. Just as the teen had said there was a nice grassy spot with a pool of water and decent tree coverage.
You dismounted, swinging your leg over and hopping down, rubbing your ikran’s forehead waiting for Neteyam to get off before coming over to him and gently grabbing his wrist, leading him over to the bank to sit. The grass was soft underneath your fingers, your tail swaying gently behind you as you sat.
“So tell me,” You looked over to Neteyam, the two of you sitting shoulder to shoulder, “How has the Olo'eyktan training coming?” Instantly Neteyam winced and shook his head, picking a blade of grass out of the earth and fiddling with it. “I don’t know,” he sighed, “I want to make Dad proud of me, happy that I’m his son. I train as hard as I can, i watch after Kiri, Tuk and Lo’ak.” He groaned, “Do not get me started on Lo’ak. I know he wants Dad to notice him but he keeps going about it the wrong way, it is only pissing him off, then I get in trouble. And dad says, ‘Don’t take the heat for his messes.’ Well when I don’t I still get the heat for them its just-!” Neteyam took a deep breath, unable to think of the words. Neteyam was frustrated, something he wasn’t able to reveal often but when you gently took his hand in yours he instantly was brought back to the present turning to look at you.
“I can not say that I know what you’re going through,” You admitted, being the middle child of three, “I know from watching my sister though that the burden of watching after your siblings, having all that pressure can be crippling, along with you now having Olo'eyktan duties but.” You squeezed his hand and looked up at him, your ears perked. “From what I see you do, you are doing amazing. Your siblings hold you in such high regard, you already have the clan's respect and trust that you’ll protect us in the future. To be so young you’re doing so good.” You reached up to cup the side of his face, “I’m proud of you.”
At your words Neteyam’s eyes pooled with tears and he had to look up at the sky to keep them from falling. You chuckled softly and wrapped your arms around his waist pulling him down into a hug which he instantly reciprocated. “You mean the world to me yawne.” You whispered into his shoulder.
After several moments, you pulled away and Neteyam wiped his eyes and nose, still sniffling. You breathed out a small laugh and cupped his face with your hands once more getting him to look at you.
“Oel ngati kameie” you whispered, putting your foreheads together, your tails subconsciously entertaining. “Oel ngati kameie.” Neteyam whispered back.
For once in his life the teen felt that he had learned what his dad called: happiness. Everything felt perfect, just the two of you in your own little paradise, ready to face the world together.
But sadly, what neither of you would expect, would be the war to come in just a few months time. Humans versus Na’vi, machine versus water, the one battle that defeated the two of you.
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shihalyfie · 2 years ago
Note
At the end of Adventure 02, Oikawa, despite being an adult, was able to meet his Digimon partner, Pipimon. So why during the events of Kizuna, they simply believe in Menoa's theory, even though they've already seen that it doesn't make sense from what happened to Oikawa and Pipimon? Even now in The Begining, they still belive in her theory. Did the 02 kids (and all other choosen children) forget what they saw in the end of Adventure 02?
I don't remember anything at all about this being mentioned in regards to The Beginning, so I can't answer anything regarding that. We don't have evidence Rui's issue has anything to do with the problem, in any case.
Well, it's true that my analysis treats Oikawa like a contradiction because I start with the premise you shouldn't be taking Menoa's theory at face value anyway, but one thing I should point out is that even in real life, people who did take Menoa's theory at face value when watching the movie did not consider Oikawa to be a contradiction. (And believe me, I actually read a page dedicated to dunking on the movie and finding contradictions as much as possible, and it was a terrible experience and I do not recommend it at all, but my point is that even someone who was out to rip apart the movie as much as possible was willing to concede this one.) Even Menoa's theory does not have anything to do with physical or legal age. I cannot stress this enough: even if you believe in Menoa's theory as much as possible, physical age has never, ever been a factor.
By her testimony, she became an adult at 14 years old, which is not an adult by any normal standard; she believes she became an "adult" because she went to university to become Mature and Accomplished. Meanwhile, Oikawa is often described in analysis as "a Chosen Child who never grew up" because he clung to an image from his past and refused to move on. He never wanted to be an adult in the first place, he even thought becoming an adult made him "tainted" and unable to go to the Digital World. So even if Menoa's view of life were correct, someone who's stubbornly clinging onto this kind of thing and refusing to accept the idea of entering general adult society would not truly have become an adult. Not even by her standards.
Even that aside, though, Kizuna only takes place over a few days. I think if you've just been informed that your partner is about to disappear and you only have a few days to process it, I don't think you're going to have the mental space to go back through and think about every single thing in your life that may or may not contradict it, much less an event that took place a whole eight years prior. I imagine the 02 kids are probably more likely to have Oikawa's death burned into their memories, but while I'm sure the older Adventure kids certainly did care, their level of attachment and involvement in the cases in 02's finale was still in the realm of "helping their juniors" and getting third-party information, and I'm sure they've seen and been involved with many other things in those last eight years. They were certainly there to see Oikawa meet Pipimon, and it was certainly an important event that probably left an impression, but they were kind of all the way in the back there, and would they easily be able to remember it instantly when they're dealing with a bunch of Chosen Children being kidnapped and their own partners potentially disappearing at any moment? I'm sure after the events of Kizuna, they'll probably have a lot of time to think back on what caused this and what they can do about it, and I don't really expect them to come up with the right answer in only a few days, or even a few weeks or months. It's a tough question.
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tenebraevesper · 10 months ago
Text
Five Nights at Freddy's: Obsolete, Night 2: Darkest Desire
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''This reality, my mentality, everything changes so rapidly, and I'm ready for the never-ending fire, dancing with my deepest dark desires. Miracle, how empirical, don't know anything quite hysterical, everything around me transpires as I fulfill my darkest desire.''
 – Darkest Desire by Dawko & Dheusta (Five Nights at Freddy's VR: Help Wanted)
xXxXxXx
''Hey, Blackburn, I need help with the arcade. One of them won't work. It just keeps refusing-''
''Unfortunately, I cannot help you with that. You'll need to ask Jackson to fix it,'' Sam replied to her co-worker, who gave her a dubious look.
''Why can't you do that?'' the co-worker, an adolescent girl older than Sam who had been hired recently to maintain the area with the arcades, asked. ''You're the technician.''
''Only for the animatronics,'' Sam replied, briefly glancing down at the box she had been holding. There was a minor accident where Showtime Foxy's eyes suddenly stopped working and Sam had to bring him to the back room in order to fix him. Unfortunately, whoever brought the replacement eyes left them at the manager's office, forcing Sam to search for them and wasting her time, since Foxy was supposed to be back at the stage as soon as possible.
Not only that, but she also had to deal with a co-worker who seemed to have issues grasping the fact that there were two different types of technicians in this establishment. Considering how the girl was new, Sam figured it was a mistake, but after working here for three weeks, her co-worker should've known better. Not to mention the fact that, when her co-worker started out, she just pushed a mop into Sam's hands and told her to clean up, despite the fact that Sam was on her way to do her own task. Then she had the guts to bring up how she was more experienced than Sam and wouldn't believe that Sam was her senior despite being younger.
She quickly changed the tune when Sam greeted the manager, who appeared to have overheard the two and sent the newbie away to do her job properly. Sam kept her cool, but the moment she got to the back room, she burst out laughing.
Screw you, Janet. Sam took a deep breath and just ignored her co-worker. She was already running late and there was a batch of kids who wanted to see a fully functioning Showtime Foxy. She walked past her briskly, hearing the latter mumbling angrily, and went to the back room, where Showtime Foxy was waiting for her.
Foxy the Pirate Fox was wearing brown pants and a blue frock coat with golden accents. He was also wearing a white fencing shirt with a black belt-like strap over his chest. On his head was a black pirate hat that had a marking resembling a red fox skull in front of two blue cutlasses that were crossed. His hand, as usual, had been replaced with a hook and he also had a black eye patch.
Sam set the box on the nearby table and turned to Foxy, taking both of his broken eyes out of the eye-sockets and replacing them with new ones. Once she was done, Foxy's eyes started to glow and he looked down at Sam curiously.
''You can go back to your stage,'' Sam told him as she put away the broken eyes. ''There is a group of children already waiting for their storyteller.''
''You could do with a smile as well, lassie,'' Foxy replied, flipping the eye-patch over his eye and walking over to the door. ''You've been quite grumpy lately.''
Sam didn't respond, simply listening to the animatronic leaving. Freddy, Bonnie, Chica, Foxy and Puppet had been acting weirdly ever since she met them, but this was something different. During the nights she had been left alone with them, she expected them to attempt to hunt her down, only to remember that they weren't the animatronics from the past locations and that they weren't haunted by anyone, be it child or adult.
As a matter of fact, they acted quite cordial towards her, never really talking with her about something that wasn't part of their role at Freddy's, but always showing the kind of high artificial intelligence they weren't supposed to have, causing Sam to wonder whether they were haunted or not. The issue was, she would've known if they were haunted since she was able to see and communicate with the spirits of the deceased, or at least sense their presence, thanks to an accident that almost led to her own death.
Frankly, the past months felt like a complete nightmare and she was just glad that she could wake up from it. At this point, she wanted to just forget everything and act like the past summer had never happened. However, she couldn't deny that there were a lot of things she had learned and that her newfound knowledge and appreciation for life was something she cherished.
You have to move on, you cannot live in the past. If you do, it will kill you, physically and emotionally.
She sighed, placing the box on the nearby shelf and checking the time on her smartphone. Her break was about to start and she figured she would go to the kitchen and order a pizza for herself using her employee discount. She also planned to bring it back home, despite her mother's objections. While Emma didn't have anything against eating pizza, she did worry about Sam eating too much of it, calling it unhealthy. Sam just shrugged it off, admitting that she mostly ate pizza as comfort food, but nevertheless decided to listen to Emma just to keep her happy.
To be honest, lately all I've been doing is to try to keep Mum happy, even if my attitude isn't exactly the best, Sam thought as she walked into the main area, only to perk up when she noticed a familiar figure sitting at a table. Once Matt noticed her, he smiled and waved her over. Sam smiled weakly, being glad to see him, but not exactly in the mood to talk to anyone.
''May I order?'' Matt asked her teasingly, with Sam rolling her eyes.
''I'm on a break, so no,'' she replied in a deadpan tone. Matt snorted.
''Anyways, are we still going to Ricky's tonight?'' he asked.
''I guess we could,'' Sam said, shrugging. ''I didn't have any other plans for tonight.''
''Great,'' Matt replied, grinning.
''However, I don't think there's much to see there,'' Sam added as she sat down across Matt. ''The location had been abandoned for months and even if we find a way inside, I don't think they kept the animatronics.''
''Do you really think so?'' Matt asked, rising an eyebrow.
''Well, why should they?'' Sam replied, feeling a little tense. She couldn't exactly tell Matt that Ricky and the Misfits had been burned down to ashes. ''I mean, the animatronics malfunctioned and murdered several people. Why would Wolfrun Corporation keep them?''
''Going back to your theory, they either malfunctioned or were programmed to murder,'' Matt said in a dry tone, his grin dropping. ''I'm pretty sure it's the latter.''
You have no idea. Sam was glad that Matt couldn't read her mind.
''Still, I guess it's nothing compared to Freddy's,'' Matt continued, looking around. ''I'm surprised people are still coming here, but on the other hand, what had happened was over 30 years ago. People tend to forget, don't they? Or rather, they want to forget and ignore what had happened.''
''I admit, I am one of those people,'' Sam told him, with Matt giving her a sympathetic look. ''Instead of valuable lessons from my experience, all I'm getting now is a headache.''
''I'm sorry about that,'' Matt replied. Sam shook her head.
''It's fine,'' she said. ''Sometimes, I feel as if I'm just overreacting.''
''If your gut feeling is telling you that something's wrong, then you aren't overreacting, but just trying to survive in a dangerous situation that is out of your control,'' Matt told her. ''As for the headache, how about a pill?''
Sam snorted. ''I'm not that desperate.''
Despite being in a rather bad mood, she actually felt a little better while talking to Matt. No matter how morbid the topic would be, he would be quite casual and nonchalant during the conversation, making her feel comfortable. She didn't need any drama and was happy to act like a conspiracy theorist. Still, she knew that this way of handling the situation wouldn't help her in the long game.
''Despite that, I still feel like a mess,'' Sam admitted.
''Then embrace it,'' Matt told her, causing Sam to rise an eyebrow. ''I think your subconscious is telling you something, but you just have trouble interpreting or accepting it.''
''…'' Sam just stared at him, thinking about it. ''You really think so?''
''Yeah,'' Matt replied, nodding. ''You should focus on your own desires.''
''I don't think this would be the best idea…'' Sam muttered, with Matt interrupting her.
''Think about it this way – you have the money for an ice-cream and you know that you will enjoy it. You know that you will feel better if you buy it,'' Matt explained, his tone getting more and more dramatic. ''However, at the same time, you are questioning yourself whether that would be a good idea: 'What if I hate the flavour? What if it makes me obsessed with eating only ice-cream? What if I get a brain freeze?'''
''Okay, I get it,'' Sam chuckled.
''Now, where was I… Ah, yes,'' Matt said, snapping his fingers. ''In short, you should spoil yourself and buy some ice-cream.''
''I thought that ice-cream was a metaphor for me dealing with whatever my subconsciousness desires,'' Sam said, a small smirk on her lips.
''Yeah, that too,'' Matt replied sheepishly, then added in a sympathetic tone, ''You know what is bothering you and there is a good chance that things will work out once you confront your issues. You can continue ignoring it, if you want, but knowing you, you're not the kind of person who would do that, especially if it's something intriguing.''
''You're right about that,'' Sam said, adding in a sarcastic tone, ''After all, I'm friends with you.''
''Is that supposed to be a compliment? If so, thanks,'' Matt told her in a chipper tone. Sam fell silent for a few moments, checking her smartphone for the time.
''You know,'' she said suddenly, ''there are things I'm curious about, but I feel that I shouldn't be, that I have no right to investigate and that I should move on from the mystery.''
''So, that's what's bothering you,'' Matt said, with Sam nodding. He sighed. ''Sam, you are aware that we are both fans of investigating stuff we probably shouldn't? Why stop now?''
''It's partially due to things I don't want to go into,'' Sam replied, lowering her head.
''It's because of the trauma you had experienced, right?'' Matt asked, causing Sam to look up at him. ''You know that I can sense it. The more you despair, the stronger it gets. The memories you have will haunt you forever even if you attempt to forget them. They're attached to you, remnants of your past.''
''You're right,'' Sam muttered. ''However, I'm still not sure about this. I've been stubbornly refusing to focus on this due to my issues, but it isn't really anything bad. Hell, I don't really think I have the right to call it traumatic in comparison to what other people went through.''
''That is your own belief,'' Matt told her. ''You're the one who gets to decide what you'll do.'' His eyes then narrowed and he grinned. ''Besides, I've seen you plenty of times making decisions with serious consequences and you're usually stubborn enough to stay by your decision, no matter how bad it is.''
''Yeah, it's kind of a habit,'' Sam replied, sighing. ''You know, I'll think about it.''
''You will?'' Matt gave her a surprised look. He didn't expect her to change her mind so soon.
''Frankly, what I want is to get some answers and satisfy my curiosity. However, my curiosity was also what caused me so much pain,'' Sam replied. ''As I said, I will give it a thought, but don't expect anything.''
''Okay,'' Matt said, giving her an encouraging smile. ''Now, about my order…''
''Matt!'' Sam glared at Matt who was laughing heartily.
xXx
Once Sam's shift was over, she and Matt made their way over to the building that used to be known as Ricky's Wonder Shack. The old neon sign was still there, albeit chipped and having no power to illuminate it. Several windows had shutters pulled down, but some didn't, allowing Sam and Matt to peek into the place. Sam still hadn't told her partner-in-crime that she had the key to the building, not really wanting to be reminded of how she got herself into this mess in the first place.
Nevertheless, this was her hobby. Investigating mysteries and getting herself into trouble was something she was used to and she loved exploring. It was quite dull trying to avoid it and, if she had to be honest with herself, she missed it.
I still have another mystery to solve and it is waiting for me back at home.
Sam glanced at Matt, who had found a cracked window and was contemplating whether to break it completely or leave it.
''I'm surprised no one graffitied the place,'' Sam said. ''I remember people being quite freaked out after what had happened.''
''Well, it is giving off a bad vibe, but so did some of the other places we had visited,'' Matt told her. ''I have some mixed feelings about this place and while I can sense a great tragedy occurring here, it kind of feels wrong, if not completely empty. It's like staring at a husk.''
''If this is what you sense while being at Ricky's, then I'm curious about what you'll feel if you were at an old Freddy's location,'' Sam replied. ''I mean, the Fazbear's Fright is still around, albeit burned to ashes.''
''You know, you could've told me about it earlier,'' Matt replied.
''To be honest, I've been trying not to think about it,'' Sam said. ''It still surprises me that I had managed to run into another hardcore FNaF fan, someone who actually is trying to solve the lore.''
''You're not the only one,'' Matt told her, grinning. ''Still, there isn't much to add to it. I mean, the main point is that the former owner of Freddy's decided to murder a bunch of children, got himself trapped into a suit and turned into a hybrid zombie. There's also some family drama, with the former partner of the murderer burning everything down, with the murdered ending up in Hell. That's all there is to it.''
''Right, but you forgot about Fazbear Entertainment making a comeback,'' Sam said, thinking about the VR game she had back home. Matt tilted his head, quietly observing Sam.
Whenever they would start talking about the Five Nigths at Freddy's lore, even though Sam's attitude didn't change, Matt could sense her instantly shutting down and moving the conversation to another topic. While she would be able to talk about it, she wasn't comfortable about the lore and whatever was attached to her would just grow stronger whenever the murderer had been mentioned. Interestingly, Sam kept calling him either The Murderer or Purple Guy, despite the fact that they knew his real name – William Afton.
Matt was aware that Sam may have had some bad experience with Freddy's history, but he was curious about just how bad it was. Nevertheless, he decided not to bother her about it. After all, he never told her about his own dark secrets, so why should she tell him about hers?
Still, it seemed that this time, their conversation had caused some kind of change in her. Perhaps, he was wrong and she was already going through this change, only for their conversation to add to it. Whatever was going on, it seemed that she was going to fight back whatever was holding her down.
''Didn't Fazbear Entertainment release that VR game a while ago – Five Nights at Freddy's: Help Wanted,'' Matt added. Sam nodded, with Matt deciding to try his luck. ''Have you played it?''
''I did play for a bit and even found some stuff, but I was too busy with real life so I left it,'' Sam admitted. ''I had thought about actually playing through it again.''
''If you do, could you tell me if you find something?'' Matt asked, with Sam giving him a surprised look.
''I thought you already had the game,'' she said, puzzled.
''Actually, I don't, since I don't have an access to a VR console,'' Matt replied. ''My parents never really payed any attention to me and had only recently realized that they actually have a son. I don't blame them, though, they have been put through a lot during the past months.''
''I'm sorry about that,'' Sam said, feeling bad for Matt. ''But, speaking of the game, aren't there any playthrough videos on YouTube?''
''I'm actually more interested in the lore rather than in the game itself and I had hoped that you'd take notes,'' Matt admitted sheepishly.
''Trust me, I will,'' Sam replied, sighing. ''I only need to convince myself to play the game and see what Fazbear Entertainment has to offer us.''
''Probably more lies,'' Matt said nonchalantly, causing Sam to snort.
''Right,'' she said. ''In any case, I will try to get as many details as possible, but I'm not really expecting anything sinister. From what I had played, they're acting as if the lore was just a made-up story, with some basis on real-life events, but greatly overblown.''
''I see,'' Matt replied. ''Also, good luck dealing with your issues. It's gonna be a struggle.''
''Yeah, it will…'' Sam muttered, feeling a little downcast. She then looked up at Matt, smiling bitterly. ''You know well how stubborn I can be.''
''I don't know whether I should regret knowing that or not,'' Matt muttered in a teasing tone, with Sam just shaking her head.
''Let's just go,'' she said, turning her back to Ricky's Wonder Shack. ''We won't find anything at this place.''
Matt just glanced at Ricky's and joined Sam, who decided to walk back home, as it was already late evening and she was quite tired. Matt's house was in another part of Hurricane, but he still could accompany Sam to some extent.
''You know, you could come to my place and we could play the game together,'' Sam told Matt, who shook his head.
''It's fine,'' he said. ''I think that playing the game is something you should do alone. We could replay it together.''
''Okay,'' Sam replied, shrugging.
She hated to admit it, but Matt was right – she had to go through this alone.
xXx
Back at home, Sam was on her laptop, staring at the icon that was the game Five Nights at Freddy's: Help Wanted. Frankly, she still had second thoughts about playing it. She knew that it was a bit ridiculous for her to hold something resembling a grudge against a video game. It just felt weird, but she was aware that this wasn't just a video game – this was a significant part of her life; a part she hated to acknowledge.
Still, if I want some peace of mind, I will have to confront this issue.
She took a deep breath and closed the lid of her laptop. Even if she was going to play it, it wouldn't be tonight. She was too tired and she had school tomorrow, figuring that she could play the game once she had some free time. She was curious, after all, desiring to learn what exactly she got herself into.
Then, there was the fact that she also had access to two versions of the game. One version was the game she had bought once it was released, but the other version, the one she had played, was given to her by her father. He had told her that it was a copy given to him by the beta tester and, while he was surprised that she gave it to him, he admitted that he mentioned Sam several times in her presence and how interested she was in the Fazbear lore and would probably take the game apart just to get more information.
Sam noted that it was quite weird that the beta tester would just give him her copy of the game and, while a bit sour considering how much the game reminded her of the past months, she didn't complain when she got it. She played a bit, but soon abandoned it, feeling quite bitter and distressed. She lost interest, but now her interest had been reignited and, aside from the lore, she was also curious about how different the beta version was from the official game.
She leaned back against the chair, remembering how she used to research the lore like crazy. She loved anything related to Freddy's, wanting to know as much possible. However, after what happened, she wanted nothing to do with Freddy's past. She was fine when it came to her work as a technician, but she ignored anything that happened over 30 years ago, including the most recent events.
Not to mention, she had to wonder what exactly this game's lore could add to what she already knew. After all, she was told by the person who committed those crimes what exactly had happened and even ran into several of his victims. She knew that all of them would want her to forget and move one, regretting that she was ever part of this. She too started to regret it.
Nevertheless, she couldn't deny that the experience was valuable… to some extent. Sure, she could do without the emotional and physical trauma, but she did feel that she had grown as a person. After all, these events were the reason why she managed to even stand up to her bullies and confront them. She felt more independent, learning to rely on her own strengths and developing an iron will.
Still, despite her stubbornness and desire to move past the pain, she was still vulnerable. She wanted to cry, she wanted to scream, she wanted to be angry… Yet, all she felt was complete emptiness.
Even feeling agony is still better than feeling nothing.
She frowned, the memories of that cursed night playing in her mind. She could still feel the warmth of the fire, the smell of the smoke and the despair as her heart shattered in a million pieces, losing the person she cared about.
Sam shook her head, driving that memory out of her mind and sighed. She glanced at the shelf above the desk and took the walkie-talkie that was on it. She stared at it for a few minutes, before turning it on.
''Tomorrow is another day,'' she spoke into it.
''Tomorrow is another day.''
Sam glanced at her bed where the Fredbear plushie was lying, having spoken in her voice. She knew that it had another walkie-talkie inside it, having been used as a tool for manipulation. It once belonged to a little boy who died a long time ago, but now it was her toy.
''Sam, you're incredible.''
Sam cracked a mischievous smile. She had to admit, talking to herself this way might be seen as a sign that she was crazy, but it was nice to pretend that someone was praising her for no reason.
''I will always be with you and so will my friends.''
Frankly, even if it was weird, she liked to comfort herself this way.
''I will never abandon you.''
Sam fell silent for a moment and then turned the walkie-talkie off. She knew that she had emotional scars and no matter what she told herself, they won't fade away. She would always feel resentful and bitter, but she had to get up and move on.
After all, unlike everyone else, she was still alive.
xXx
''Hello. Can you hear me?''
''Unfortunately, I can,'' William Afton grumbled bitterly, attempting to ignore the entity. If he was already trapped in this void, then he wanted to be alone. However, this was impossible for reasons he still had trouble understanding.
''I am you.''
These words echoed in his head and he was still shocked, trying to figure out what this meant. Why was this entity talking to him in his voice and claiming that it was him? He thought at first that he was going crazy, but then realized that him hearing voices in his head shouldn't really surprise him. He had dealt with much wierder stuff.
He pinched the bridge of his nose, trying to calm down and figure out how exactly he got himself into this situation, but all he could remember was that, at one point, everything was there and in the next moment, everything was gone. Frankly, he was glad that he didn't have to deal with that kid anymore, but he would've been grateful if someone explained to him what exactly was going on here. He was still in his personal Hell, right?
''No, you're not.''
William rose an eyebrow as he heard the entity again. It was just a whisper, but the entity sounded rather matter-of-fact. Frankly, he wanted to avoid talking to this entity, but he then realized that this wouldn't be possible and that, if the entity knew what was going on, he should at least question it about this place.
''What happened?'' he asked.
''You're broken, but I know how to fix you,'' the entity replied. ''Your soul is torn, but if you allow me to stay, I could mend it, so you would never feel this pain again.''
''How do I know that I can trust you?'' William asked.
''Do you really believe that you can't trust yourself?'' the entity asked him. William frowned, having to admit that the entity had a point. However, he still had no idea how this being was actually himself. Did his soul split apart or something? Even though he couldn't see it, he could imagine the entity grinning as it added, ''You could say that something like that had happened.''
''It still doesn't make any sense,'' William said.
''Everything you did doesn't make sense, but you accepted it nevertheless,'' the entity replied sarcastically. William had to admit that the entity had a point. ''Now, you can stay and suffer, or we can leave once again.''
William's eyes narrowed as he stared at he void in silence. He still didn't understand how he managed to get out of this place last time, but he figured this entity had something to do with it. However, that wasn't possible, as this entity was him, or at least a part of him.
'''An entity a mere soul cannot comprehend',''he repeated the words he had heard a long time ago.
He stood there in silence, thinking about what had happened, trying to comprehend the situation this time. If his assumptions were correct, then he never had any help in leaving this forsaken place. He was able to leave on his own, simply because he wanted to leave. As his other self had told him, his determination was his greatest quality.
''It seems that you understand now.''
William found himself nodding absent-mindedly. While his assumptions may have been correct, there was still a missing piece to this puzzle, and he had a feeling that he wouldn't find it here. If he wanted to know more, he would have to return back to the realm of the living. However…
''Why should I do that?'' he said. ''I promised to myself that I wouldn't return.''
''That is the issue, isn't it?'' the entity said in a teasing tone. ''You're being given chance after chance, but every time you come back, things go wrong. Are you afraid that you will waste this one as well?''
William fell silent, having to admit that his other self was right – a part of him was afraid that he would just cause another disaster. After all, it seemed that this was everything he was capable of doing.
''You wouldn't be by yourself this time,'' the entity continued. ''One day, I'd like to be invited outside of this domain.''
William stared at the darkness, noticing a strange purple glow taking a shape. However, he couldn't make out what it was, as it seemed to be glitching in and out of existence.
''This reality, my mentality, everything changes so rapidly,'' the entity said in a sing-song voice. ''Everything's coming together, now, erupting in terror and corrupting whoever won't confront this growing fear. To confide to myself, the consequences were derided once I decided to come back.'' The entity laughed mirthfully. ''Look at me, you can't ignore the fact that I'm feeling so incomplete, so don't even try to retreat. You may say that you don't have any regrets, but you know that you don't want to be here, alone and forsaken. I know I can leave, I know what I want. We know what we need. Our nature is incomprehensible, transpiring beyond any laws set, so why shouldn't I allow myself to return once again? I deserve it!''
Even though there was a part of him that still protested, William knew that he was right. He worked too hard to give up now. He wanted to return, no matter the cost. What had happened couldn't be changed, but he knew that there was still something he needed to complete. He had the knowledge and the ability to return. Only he was able to give his soul a new body, one that matched who he really was. He could give way to a new reality, one he could control. He suffered long enough, didn't he?
''I always come back…'' he whispered, feeling the tears inside him, pulsing through his soul. This agony he felt, it was what gave him strength. No matter how broken his mind he was, he had no doubt anymore. He was incomplete, but he would regain what he had lost. ''The reason I want to leave…''
He stared at the darkness, at the figure shaped like a humanoid bunny, its eyes glowing purple, the same colour as William's, and smiling in delight.
''So we can fulfill our darkest desire.''
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#Five Nights at Freddy's: The Untold Story (Masterlist)
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psychelis-new · 11 months ago
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hello, love, i hope you're doing allright. i hope i am not bothering you.. if so, please feel free to ignore this ask <3
could you please tell me your opinion about this? https://www.tumblr.com/goldenestheart/737125132364120064/okay-i-have-to-add-something-remember-this-is-my?source=share
Thank you so much and have wonderful day/night.
Hello darling!
My opinion is always the same. :)
Readings are based on the energy and intention present in the moment they are done/read/received, but each one of us is always able of changing the result (especially the far away in the future-results): not taking an action, changing your mind, having doubts, doing or not doing something is always in your hands and this ofc can change the result of readings (as it changes the background intentions) or postpone their realization too. Or they can come true but in a different way than we expect them to and we may miss that too. Basically, this person is right on this "the future is in your hands" (but also in the hands of fate and faith, at times).
If you believe in energies and that we're all connected, you can believe that someone on the other side of the world can see your future when you ask them to. It's not a matter of age (what society wants you to do is "to act up, grow up, be an adult", as this person is saying, but this doesn't mean you need to close off magic from your life: you can still be in touch with your inner child and help them believe that you can reach your dreams; it doesn't mean you're naive or stupid and if someone is judging you this way, you can be sure it's pretty much their pain talking -this is plain psychology). And you can also believe that this reader living on the other side of the world can read your energy through initials or any other mean they find of use. Why this cannot be real? (The opposite question is as important here imo).
If we start putting mind (as this person says "use your brain") into a realm that has a little to nothing to do with reason, ofc nothing will work. Nothing will make sense. But it doesn't have to, does it? We're not talking about things that always make sense by books' definition: your intuition is not reason (reason ruins it, if anything); the same way your energy cannot be simplified in a math equation and always be reasonable under your own timing and conditions (and even Einstein was saying: everything is energy, we are made of energy too). You cannot ask it to be so reasonable cause it makes you feel better and it gives you a little bit of control over the whole process. Sadly there's no such deep control over energies nor future. It's a matter of trusting and believing, also in divine timing. In getting ready for something. Maybe not what you precisely wished for as not everything may be for you the way you'd like it to, but... stay ready and open to receive blessings, and you'll be provided.
I rather not judge others generally but to me, this person is very much hurt now. And I'm sorry. They probably held very high hopes or based everything on readings they got but never moved a finger to make things happen (or didn't take the proper actions, maybe even those suggested by a reader IDK), they simply waited or had doubts all over the process, and this is why none of the readings they got ever happened to be true. Not even partially (which I doubt, but it could be ofc. Maybe they have a better memory than me, a memory that is also not biased by the negativity -when we encounter negative stuff in life, when we feel triggered/overwhelmed, we tend to focus on that alone and forget about any little positive around us or in our past. That's pretty much human but it can enter also in our spirituality: we can stop believing ofc cause we're hurt and feel let down once again also on that side). Maybe they also asked the wrong readers: not because you pay a reader they HAVE TO be the right one to read you, imo. Energies go beyond our 3d "rules". Or, they took readings too much by word while at times that's not how they need to be taken (for them, and in that specific case): I for example once got in a pac I would have inherited/gained a huge amount of money in a couple of days but instead I found a few bucks (which honestly, very good: they came as unexpectedly). I think this is why their inner child is still in the same place and very much wounded, refusing to believe in energies and magic but turning to a much easier and safer "it's all bs"-life. They just feel abandoned once again and don't wanna suffer anymore and I honestly understand it too. If it makes them feel safer and more in control, sure they have to do it. They need to take a distance and cope with the pain as it's better for them to. And heal whatever trigger they got (be it even time running away and them still seeing nothing/no change and feeling let down and trapped in some hurtful reality). And if they'll need to come back to spirituality one day, they can too ofc: they need to follow what's better for them at any given time. Each one of us should do this. Ask ourselves/the 5d questions, try to understand, have doubts... it's all good and normal: we're humans. Let's be solving what's not working so to make it work for us.
But. It's also not right to offend others or impose on them our beliefs cause of our pain and our situation. I think everyone is free of believing or not in spirituality and to decide in what ways. It's a very personal thing to me. It's something each one of us has to decide inside of themselves, meditating what's best for them at each time of their lives too. It's not something someone else can decide for you, no matter what. It's not something someone can impose on you or judge you for. It goes beyond everything. (SInce you're here though, I assume you may believe, so:) Y'all are very much able to understand when getting a reading if someone is telling you something that is accurate on you, be it an image or a sign or anything, or not. If you're only hearing what you need to hear or not. You can objectively understand if you're being played with random words that can work for everyone (remember in pacs obviously words will be more general) or if there are messages that are just for you and resonate for you and your question. I'm not saying there aren't scammers (especially in my culture it's plenty), but I am also saying you can recognize them. And I am also saying you can ofc follow an advice given by a reader as much as you can refuse to acknowledge it: at times we're not open enough to receive certain type of guidance or to understand it and that's okay. If we need to receive a message, you can be pretty sure the Universe will deliver it clearly. And also: not everything that doesn't happen in our life as/when we'd like to (or as mentioned in a reading) is there to hinder us, or to tell us "no". Maybe it's there simply as a lesson we need to learn to actually get there, and if we're not getting it right we're just hindering ourselves out of a mistake.
Let me end with: please keep using readings and astrology as a guidance/signs, not as the Holy Grail of your life.
Have a lovely day/night!<3
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wolint · 1 year ago
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FRESH MANNA
RASH OATH
Judges 11
Jephthah was the ninth judge of Israel, who started life as the son of a harlot and became “a mighty man of valour” but the most tragic character of the scripture. Why? Jephthah made an unnecessary vow that affected his daughter and family.
As believers and leaders wherever we are, we must avoid making poor choices that are detrimental to everyone.
DO NOT MAKE AN OATH! Deuteronomy 23:21-23, Leviticus 19:12, and James 5:12 warns. Scripture clearly states that rash oaths are wrong whether sworn in good or evil. Rashness is in opposition to the character of God and, therefore, should not be in the character of God’s people. To make a rash oath is to make an impulsive promise based on intense emotion, i.e., anger, fear, jealousy.
Jephthah made a vow to sacrifice the first thing that came out of his house if he defeated the Ammonites in battle. His only child, his daughter was the first to come out to greet Jephthah, who probably expected an animal or servant, but this unexpected event caused him to lament. The daughter graciously and surprisingly accepted her fate in verses 37–38.
Though a mighty warrior according to Judges 11:1, he was driven away from the family as an adult because he was considered an illegitimate child. Verse three records that he moved to the land of Tob and lived among “a gang of scoundrels.”
Regardless of where we’ve been, or what we’ve done, God can still use us. We don’t determine our roots, and despite our past, God can use us in great ways.
It's easy to make rash oaths in desperate times but that’s when we should be more careful not to be overcome by emotions.
Jephthah lost his only child over a rash oath. A tragic choice made out of desperate emotions and impulsive moves.
Jephthah had to endure trouble from the people of Ephraim despite his being empowered by God’s Spirit to free Gilead from the Ammonites.
When his delighted daughter heard that her father was outside the door, she came dancing out to greet him. The girl’s joyful welcome and the happy music of timbrels were quickly silenced when Jephthah saw her. He immediately started wailing, “Oh no, my daughter! You have brought me down and I am devastated. I have made a vow to the Lord that I cannot break …” Judges 11:35 NIV.
Really! He’s going to blame his innocent daughter for his oath. Notice that Jephthah did not even repent of his oath or ask God to forgive him, just like Adam before him in Genesis 3:1-12. Jephthah was an ignorant judge; he should have remembered that God forbade child sacrifice in Deuteronomy 12:29-31, which will make his oath offensive to God.
Honour is a serious matter, and we should all have it but not to the detriment of a life. A man's reputation should be important to him and reneging on a vow was a serious offence but not to the detriment of another’s life.
The Bible has several things to say about oaths in Numbers 30:2.
Jesus taught concerning vows in Matthew 5:33-37, “You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, ‘Do not break your oath, but keep the oaths you have made to the Lord.’ But I tell you, Do not swear at all: either by heaven, for it is God’s throne; or by the earth, for it is his footstool; or by Jerusalem…, Simply let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,” ‘No’; anything beyond this comes from the evil one”.
We must be cautious of making promises, especially impulsive ones that may be difficult to keep; make your yes, a yes or your no, a no per Jesus’s instructions.
PRAYER: Father, forgive me oh Lord for every rash oath I have made, help me to exercise self-control in making promises and keeping my words within the parameters of your word in Jesus’ name. Amen.
Shalom
WOMEN OF LIGHT INT PRAYER MIN.
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queenharumiura · 2 years ago
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[ Dream + that scene of tsuna vs byakuran at the very end of future arc. i am so curious ]
Taken from meme: [x] ||Accepting|| ((OOC: //loud groaning noise of ‘ohhh—this is gonna SUCK- forgive me, I’m absolutely cutting some corners here bc otherwise RIP fingers.’ A rare POV because I felt like it.)) @parallelroutes
Word count: 2,026 (yes, even with me cutting corners)
“… no other choice than to defeat Byakuran.” Maybe if we were a bit faster, we would’ve heard everything that Reborn-chan said in that moment. I know what happens next. A lil snort of a laugh, really.
Tensions are high and I can feel my heartbeat racing in my ear drums. This was a dre-no, a nightmare that was very familiar to me. Though- it was a bit different this time around.
“Hahaha! What a surprise! Your last resort at a time like this is to try and slap some fighting spirit into him!?”
Reborn-chan, ever the calm one: “This is my method. Listen Tsuna. You’re not the only one who’s fighting a battle of dying will. Uni’s sacrificing her life in order to return you all to a peaceful past!”
The way my heart drops to the pit of my stomach is something I don’t think I’ll ever forget. I know what happens, I was there for it, and yet, the sheer panic and grief remains, like a perfect echo of what I felt in that moment. In the back of my mind, I know there isn’t much for me to worry about, but that’s the fun thing about nightmares, your emotions aren’t so easy to control.
“Eh? Is that so?”
How he could still smile in a situation like that, it was beyond me.
“Uncle… why do you know…?” I remember this being such a huge shock. This girl, near my age, had to accept the fact that she was going to die. It’s easy enough to say that she knew it was for the better good, but no one can really know what that feels like until they’re put in the same spot.
It wasn’t just shock on her face, then. You could see the bit of fear, the sadness, and many other complex emotions.
“Of course, I know. I guessed as much. You and your grandmother Luce are two peas in a pod.”
Perhaps, Luce-san had done something similar, sacrificing herself for others. If Uni-chan is really that much like her grandmother, then Luce-san must’ve been a wonderful person.
“Hm then I must stop you form doing such a foolish thing. After all, Uni-chan’s life exists for my sake?”
The absolute nerve. A real piece of work, this one is. Uni-chan’s life exists for herself and those that she cares for. Her life cannot and will not ever exist just for one singular person. That’s how life is, you build relationships, and you exist for a multitude of reasons, and not simply for some grandiose, misguided goal of some punk of a world-dominator.
As expected, Tsuna-san couldn’t hear such a thing laying down (ignoring the fact that he was in fact laying down in that time, you know what I mean). He starts struggling to get up. Everyone starts calling for him.
A truly emotional scene. Even if things looked bad, I remember having faith in Tsuna-san. No matter what, he’d always end up pulling through for everyone and save the day. That was something I really admired about him, the fact that though he had his many faults, he had a good sense of timing. He knew what was important and when to really exert all your effort—sorry, dying will, for something.
“Haha, I can’t believe Tsuanyoshi-kun really woke up form your reproachful encouragement, Reborn-kun. You two really make an astounding team.”
“I wont… hand Uni… over to you…” Tsuna-san seems to have finally come to, regaining his ability to start speaking.
Kyoko and I didn’t see what happened as we were still far away, so we don’t know what led up to the point of Tsuna-san laying on the ground like that. Quite frankly, we were focused on Uni-chan who was floating away towards the danger-zone. Whatever it was, hopefully it wasn’t anything too bad? I don’t understand why everyone else was outside of the mysterious sphere either.
It was something I still haven’t gotten any answers to, and it was hard to bring it up.
Time, is linear, but it isn’t quite so in dreams. Sometimes, it’s for the better, and other times—it’s not.
Like clock-work, as I always feel relieved that his injuries must not have been so bad if he were able to get up, the scene flashes ahead.
It… it really is something of nightmares.
The scene of a miniature white dragon piercing through Tsuna-san’s chest, supposedly through his heart is something I can’t ever forget. This scene alone has made so many cameo appearances in my dreams that I can’t help but feel afraid when Tsuna-san and the others go on dangerous missions.
I see this overlapping the other’s at times and I wake up in a cold sweat, not quite able to fall back asleep as I glare at my phone, as if I’m warning it to not ring and be the bearer of bad news.
Again, even if my memories of the event would allow me to know that a ring had saved his life, I can’t calm the torrential wave of emotions coursing through my veins. Death is a scary concept for most, but witnessing it is another level.
It was an infinite time worse when it involved someone you love. Now, it’s paste tense, but at the time, you know?
The dissonance if quite funny, actually. In this nightmare, I’m not watching like I’m some third party observer, but I’m back in that moment. The emotions are raw and real, but at the same time, they rage and despair. Sometimes, they’re calm and relaxed in times of high tension.
I really disliked having this nightmare because it drove my emotions every which way. Now, there was an extra bit of—awkwardness? That seemed right to say.
I can’t help but wonder in the deep recesses of my mind that I’m having this nightmare not because someone’s going on a dangerous mission, but because I started hanging out with Byakuran-san recently. There is a big disconnect between the one I see in this nightmare and the one I sometimes talk to on occasion in recent events.
Now, I have the added feeling of feeling confused and unfamiliarity.
Normally, I’d continue to see the series of events leading up to Uni-chan sacrificing her life. I’d have to watch as she dies alongside Gamma-san again, but I don’t this time around.
Time skips ahead again.
“The arcobaleno aren’t reviving!”
“No, the flames should have been properly absorbed. It’ll take a little more time.”
Ah—this time.
I want to look away. I want to shut my eyes, but the me of that time didn’t. I hear some people can perfectly control their actions in dreams, but maybe it’s because this is a memory that I can’t have that liberty. I’m forced to look on as I did back then.
I have to watch as Byakuran-san snaps upon Uni-chan’s death.
He’s really unrecognizable compared to the person he is today in present day. My mind can’t help but conjure up some kind of mental overlay of the two, and it’s… scary. It was amazing to see just how starkly different they were from each other.
Yes, I acknowledge that they’re different people, but at the same time, they’re not. It’s probably more accurate to say that this is one outcome of who he could be if circumstances led up to that.
I try to move back, to turn away from what I know is to come next, but. I. Just. Won’t. Budge! It’s so surreal to be stuck in your own body and not be able to move as you’d like. To feel emotions that you know don’t make sense—or to think things that are out of place.
It’s possible this is just a smidge of how he feels to be stuck with this history permanently etched over you like a looming cloud, even if you yourself know you are different. If so, it’s incredibly stifling. It’s frustrating. It’s SO unfair. Try as I might, I can’t move nor look away.
Emotions that were felt in that moment are felt in tandem with the panic and dread that the me of today feels. It’s a new kind of torment, I’m coming to find out. The betrayal and hatred that overcomes you as you feel ashamed of feeling what you did in the past, though you know in that moment- it was acceptable.
Who wouldn’t feel relief in the wake of a horrible person dying?
Yet- as I’m trying to get him to open up to me and help him walk on an unsteady path, I feel ashamed for how I’m feeling. The anticipation, of what was to happen. It’s deplorable, but I can’t fault myself for it either.
How was I to know at the time that a younger Byakuran-san isn’t so… well… that? In retrospect, she wasn’t in the wrong, but I feel she is.
“Who do you think it was that killed Uni?”
No. Stop it.
“Because you made this world the way it is…”
Please, I don’t want to see it.
“Uni…”
Stop!!!
I’m stuck in his hell trap (otherwise known as my own body) unable to break free. The absolutely ironic thing is that the me of that time was crying as I can feel myself mentally doing—but the feelings behind it are different.
The Haru of that time cried from grief over having watched Uni sacrifice herself for everyone. My mentality is different, I’m beyond frustrated. I want out of here. I don’t want to see another person die in front of me. I felt so guilty. It felt wrong. I shouldn’t be here.
I don’t want to be here.
“Died!! I won’t forgive you, Byakuran!”
I can’t really explain it, but it’s like I’m conscious of there being two of me. The me of that time, and the me of today who is like some parasite observer who can witness this scene by possessing another. I’m aware of my own feelings and the movements I wish to make, but I’m also hyper-aware of what the ‘host’ is doing and feeling.
I’m aware of two existences, in essence. The inner turmoil I’m going through as I’m desperately trying to not have to see what comes next has me crying- even though I’m not—actually crying. Soul or mental images of yourself can’t really cry, but I feel as if I am.
You know? True betrayal is in the form of my brain going, ‘you keep thinking about this scene a lot. You must really want to see it. I’ll skip forward for you.’
If I had a habit of cussing, I would. I could promise you that, but alas, I’m a lady.
Despite it being against my wishes, I watch that Byakuran’s final moments. Engulfed in flames. The sound is nonpleasant. The me of the time felt part relieved to know it was all over, but she still felt sorrowful at the fact someone else had died. She’d witnessed two deaths in the span of what…30 minutes?
Tink! That was the sound of a ring falling.
The me of now? What is it that I feel? It’s so much. Sadness? Guilt? Embarrassment? Fear, anger, disappointment, and so much more. So… so much more.
Maybe so much that it was enough that I jolt awake. Sitting up in my bed, covered in cold sweat. Ah- also tears.
Curling my knees into my chest, my forehead rests against my knees as I heave a heavy sigh. “Do I have the right to support him, or try to help?”
There’s a chance that my presence would ultimately be a hindrance to him.
Maybe because I’d known about him and witnessed his death, there was some wariness and uncomfortable feelings that only cause bad memories or feelings to surface, setting him back.
There’s that frustrated feeling again.
“Hah… I’m not going to get much sleep tonight, am I?” I quietly climb out of bed, wiping the tears out of the corners of my eyes to sit on the ground and start stretching, relieving some of the tension in my body.
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miraclemagnet · 3 years ago
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how to motivate yourself to restart your manifestation journey and really persist time after countless of tries over the years, where you always gave up and now feel a lack of energy to try once again? even though you still believe in the law and your heart still aches for your dream life. sorry if this is too dramatic, i'm going through it lol btw thanks for deciding to start this blog, i love your personality!
AYO ANON! [Sorry this is a bit long *sighs*]
First of all, take a good break. Listen to music to unwind or simply do things that make you feel good. You actually don't need a break in order to get back on track, but it feels like you actually need some time for yourself SO RELAX AND CHILL BESTIE. PRIORTIZE YOURSELF.
I can understand how you feel now. Even I had gone through the same phase of doubting myself and the law and getting super-frustrated because I THOUGHT that I wasn't able to manifest anything.
What you need to do is:
GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER. LIKE REALLY.
Its alright if you feel pressurized or stressed right now, or if you feel like crying your heart out. ACTUALLY, YOU SHOULD DO THAT. LET OUT YOUR EMOTIONS. IT IS A FACT THAT YOUR EMOTIONS CAN'T AFFECT OR CHANGE YOUR MANIFESTATION. SO take some time off from tumblr and stuff and recharge yourself.
IF YOU ASSUME YOU'RE DOING SOMETHING WRONG, THEN YOU WON'T BE ABLE TO MANIFEST.
ASSUMING = THINKING = MANIFESTING
STOP THINKING YOU'RE DOING SOMETHING WRONG. STOP THINKING NOTHING IS HAPPENING IN YOUR FAVOR. STOP THINKING YOU'RE NOT GETTING YOUR RESULTS.
STOP. THINKING. DUMB. SHIT.
LET GO OF YOUR OLD STORY. WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU WANNA THINK ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED IN THE PAST? WHO GIVES A FUCK ABOUT THE PAST? FORGET YOUR PAST. STOP GIVING IMPORTANCE TO YOUR PAST.
Your past = Old story.
OLD story. WHO THE HELL GIVES A FUCK ABOUT THE OLD STORY?
Bestie point number one, STOP THINKING ABOUT THE PAST.
Point number two : SELF-CONCEPT
WORK ON YOUR SELF-CONCEPT. I KNOW IT MIGHT BE A LITTLE DIFFICULT AT THE START, BUT TRUST ME THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING EVER. LIKE LITERALLY.
IT SEEMS LIKE THE PAST YOU WAS A LITTLE INSECURE AND DOUBTFUL. LET GO OF YOUR PAST SELF.
START THINKING:
I HAVE EVERYTHING I WANT BECAUSE I'M THE FUCKING GOD OF THIS WORLD.
I NEVER GET ANY INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS. I LITERALLY HAVE ZERO LIMITING BELIEFS.
I BELIEVE IN MYSELF BECAUSE I'M THE GOD OF MY REALITY.
LITERALLY NOTHING CAN STOP ME FROM GETTING WHAT I WANT.
THE ONLY LIMIT IS YOUR MIND. ONCE YOUR MINDSET IS SET ON WHAT YOU WANT, NOTHING CAN STOP YOU. FUCK THOSE LIMITING BELIEFS, YOU CREATE YOUR LIFE.
Point number three bestie: THE FUCKING 3D.
YOU KEEP ON CHECKING RESULTS. KEEP ON CHECKING FOR SIGNS THAT YOUR MANIFESTATION IS COMING.
Bestie-
WHY THE FUCK YOU WANNA DO THAT?
" Because I'm not sure that I'm actually manifesting-
CHANGE. YOUR. FUCKING. THOUGHTS.
THE 3D IS MY BITCH.
THE 3D ALWAYS CONFORMS INSTANTLY NO MATTER WHAT.
I CONTROL THE 3D BECAUSE I'M GOD BRUH.
WHY DO I ALWAYS MANIFEST INSTANTLY?
ETC. ETC. ETC.
YOU control the 3D. The 3D doesn't control YOU. REMEMBER YOU HAVE THE POWER.
Last thing.
PERSISTING = JUST THINKING POSITIVE LITERALLY.
PERSISTING IS AFFIRMING FIRMLY NO MATTER WHAT THE 3D SHOWS YOU.
KEEP ON REPEATING AND REPEATING AND REPEATING AND REPEATING.
PERSISTING IS LITERALLY THAT EASY.
BESTIE, YOU'RE GOD. YOU ALWAYS GET EVERYTHING YOU WANT. NOTHING SHOULD CHANGE YOUR THOUGHTS. NOTHING.
MAKE YOUR MIND STRONG. MAKE YOUR THOUGHTS IMPOSSIBLE TO CHANGE.
YOUR MANIFESTATION CANNOT FAIL. YOU MAY GET IT A LITTLE LATE OR A LITTLE EARLY THAN EXPECTED BUT IT CANNOT FAIL.
YOU'RE ALWAYS MANIFESTING = THINKING. YOU LITERALLY THOUGHT "I DIDN'T GET MY DESIRE" SO YOU DIDN'T GET IT.
CHANGE. YOUR. MINDSET.
BESTIE PLEASE STAY FIRM.
HOW BAD DO YOU WANT YOUR DESIRES FULFILLED?
THINK OF THAT AND MANIFEST.
I'M PROUD OF YOU THAT YOU STILL HAVE THE STRENGTH TO KEEP MANIFESTING. MOST PEOPLE JUST GIVE UP WHEN THEY ARE ABOUT TO GET THEIR DESIRES AND TOSS THE LAW ASIDE.
You can simply start thinking:
I don't judge myself for my mistakes. I never give up. I am going to succeed because I SAID SO BECAUSE I'M GOD.
I'M AMAZING. I'M HARDWORKING. I'M PERFECT.
I'M ALWAYS TRYING MY LEVEL BEST. THERE'S NO NEED FOR ME TO BE SO HARD ON MYSELF.
STOP WASTING YOUR TIME REGRETTING AND DOUBTING AND START MANIFESTING BESTIE. GET BACK ON TRACK.
IF YOU'RE TIRED, take REST but don't STOP.
YOU'VE FUCKING GOT THIS YOU BEAUTIFUL PIECE OF SHIT.
REMEMBER YOU'RE DOING NOTHING WRONG.
NOTHING CAN STOP YOU FROM GETTING WHAT YOU WANT BECAUSE YOU'RE A BOSS BITCH.
MANIFESTING IS EXTREMELY EASY FOR YOU AND YOU ALWAYS SUCCEED YOU POWERFUL MOTHERFUCKER.
YOU. CAN. DO. THIS.
GET YOUR FUCKING DREAM LIFE AND MAKE THOSE BITCHES JEALOUS.
GET YOUR DESIRES RIGHT NOW. [Hang on you've already got them *smirks*]
I LOVE YOU, YOU FUCKING DRAMATIC BITCH!
LETS GOOOOOOO!
Love, Moon.
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corrodedcoughin · 2 years ago
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I'm sorry I literally cannot stop thinking about Steve moving in with the Hendersons and I need a place to put my thoughts before I explode. I just!!!!! He gets a family that actually loves him!!!
Claudia Henderson says he can stay as long as he needs to, when Steve first moves in. He'll always have a place with her and Dusty. But of course Steve can't quite believe it, walking around on eggshells, not asking for anything. She's just saying that to be polite. Maybe he starts quietly looking for apartments he absolutely can't afford alone on his Family Video salary. Apologises for getting in their way. Doesn't bring it up when they have something for dinner he really can't stomach, or when he doesn't get to watch this sports game he was really looking forward to watching on TV because he doesn't want to kick them out of their own living room
But then maybe he starts seeing the little ways both Claudia and Dustin are settling Steve into their life like he always belonged there.
On the list of important numbers next to the phone; below their doctor, the vet, family, and The Party's home phones Steve can see Claudia has carefully added the Family Video number, his manager Keith (so she can call him in sick if she needs to), Robin's house, and then Eddie's trailer.
He overhears Dustin radio-ing Suzie and talking about how it's so cool Steve's living with them now, he's always wanted a brother.
His shifts at family video and his standing movie nights with Robin have been added to the Calendar hung up in the kitchen because Claudia worries if she doesn't know where he and Dustin are.
Tews the cat will run up to him meowing excitedly when he gets home from work. The cat winding around around his legs demanding pets and cuddles (and also food).
Dustin will remember to tape a baseball game Steve mentions he wants to watch on TV but can't, as he's got a shift at Family Video he can't swap.
Claudia will be talking to her friends on the phone and refer to Dustin and Steve together as "her boys" and Steve tries very hard to ignore his heart clenching in his chest.
It was one thing to be offered to stay in their spare room (Steve's room, now); but it's a whole other can of worms for them to REMEMBER him and the things he says and his interests and them making an effort to fit him into their life.
I'm just aaa!!! I love Steve and I love him finding his own family! And your thoughts are always SO GOOD!
STOP NO OH NO I CANT!!! ‘My boys’ GETTING ADDED TO THE CALENDAR!!! Claudia Henderson I LOVE you!!! And you op, this made my heart clench so tightly. Steve is going to feel loved if it’s the LAST thing the Henderson’s do!
Steve doesn’t invite Robin or Eddie round because he doesn’t want to interrupt dustin or Claudia’s life but then one week Claudia suggests he invites them both round for dinner next week. Steve is dumbstruck. So he just looks and nods and eventually just comes out with ‘wha-yeah-I mean-yes. Yes. Thank you. Wow yes. Are you sure? You don’t have to! I know how much extra work that would be Mrs Henderson. It’s okay! Thank yo-‘
‘Steve. Honey. I know all of Dusty’s friends, I’d like to know yours too. Invite them over. Please.’ All said with a hand on Steve’s cheek and ending with a tender hug. Steve tucks his nose into Claudia’s hair and tries his best to resist lifting her up and spinning her. ‘And Steve, what did I say? It’s Claudia or anything but Mrs Henderson.’ Steve nods and trips off with a smile on his face, rubbing the back of his head and just so grateful.
Of course he’s spending more time with Dustin and Steve has never felt more himself. His time with the younger boy never holds any expectation. Sure at the beginning he was worried about disappointing him by not living up to the ‘king Steve’ allegations but they are past that now. Steve knows that Dustin simply just enjoys spending time with him regardless of what they do. Steve knows this but he doesn’t understand it. Doesn’t know if he ever will but he’s willing to try. He wants to be there for Dustin, whatever that means.
The year anniversary or Steve moving in approaches and Steve wants to get the Hendersons something special but doesn’t want to make a big deal out of something they probably don’t even remember. He deliberates over it for weeks. He just can’t find the perfect gift, nothing encapsulates how grateful he is. How loved he has felt since being brought in by them. The anniversary arrives, Steve thinks they have forgotten anyway so he can buy some more time but he comes home from work and Claudia has made his favourite dinner and Dustin is sat at the table in a suit because ‘it’s an important date Steve!’
Steve tears up. Guilt eating at him for not having anything for them and for convincing himself they didn’t care. He can see it in their eyes. They do care, they love him. And he loves them. So he tells them. He tells them every day. And one day when he’s out thrift shopping with Eddie he finds an embroidered cushion with ‘my family’ on it. He buys it and leaves it on the couch. Their couch.
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dorimena · 3 years ago
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Hi, I love your work and if your requests are open would you consider the following?
Monoma is on patrol with y/n and Monoma being well....Monoma, he was horny and was teasing y/n. Not having any of this shit, she proceeds to dom the fuck out of him during patrol. She takes him into an alleyway and fucks him with a strap that she had on her already (she was already planning on something but didn’t go through with it because work is work and she’s aware that Monoma and her could take their time when they got home). She pushes him into the wall and fucks him silly. Monoma is loving it and keeps begging “Mommy fuck me more, please!”. She gives him what he wants but she tells him to be quiet or else the bystanders would fine their great Phantom Thief in a puddle of his own cum while getting fucked by his mommy. At some point two civilians hear Monoma panting and hiccuping and get concerned. Y/n keeps fucking him and reassures them that Phantom Thief is fine. He cums then and there and she tells him to reassure the civilians that he’s ok. Monoma whimpers out that he’s fine and y/n cleans him up and cuddles him in the alleyway telling him how much of a good boy he was.
(I’ve been thinking about this ever since I read your shower blowjob story. This man makes the dom in me go crazy. He’s already a whining bitch, having him be like that in the bedroom just- 😫)
Let me say that I’ve had a scene in my head almost the same as this one you sent me and I am absolutely thrilled because yessss more attention to bratty baby Monoma ٩(♡ε♡)۶
And honestly, this man is just asking for it. Bet he wants to fucked anywhere, anytime, as long as he's put back into his place. That's his kink-
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𝔠𝔥𝔞𝔯𝔞𝔠𝔱𝔢𝔯; Monoma Neito
𝔴𝔬𝔯𝔡 𝔠𝔬𝔲𝔫𝔱; 3.5k
𝔴𝔞𝔯𝔫𝔦𝔫𝔤𝔰; fem!reader, pegging, mommy kink, slight exhibitionism, public sex, mentioned sex toy (butt plug), implied overstimulation, multiple orgasms, implied after care, domme!reader, sub!character
𝔬𝔱𝔥𝔢𝔯 𝔱𝔞𝔤𝔰; begging, humiliation, Monoma being a little shit, because he wanted your attention, and to rile the fuck out of you, aged-up character: Monoma is 20+
𝔰𝔦𝔡𝔢𝔫𝔬𝔱𝔢; I unknowingly kind of changed a few things from the ask, like the conversation between Monoma and the bystanders, but I hope you like it anon! The ending is kind of rushed, sorry about that!
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𝕭𝖊𝖎𝖓𝖌 𝖆 𝖇𝖎𝖙𝖈𝖍 𝖎𝖘 𝖒𝖞 𝖐𝖎𝖓𝖐
“Now, now, y/n, you know ignoring someone, specifically the love of your life, is a crime? How else are you to beg for my love if you go on and ignore my graceful presence? Are you listening to me? At least lend me your attention.”
He’s been like this for the past couple of hours since you’ve both been assigned together for patrol. You thought it’d be a good idea, and Monoma was also excited when your boss told you both to get ready and head to the neighborhood you’re meant to keep a watch over.
The neighborhood turned out not as empty or quiet as you expected, rather close to a busy street. Some stores and restaurants seem to align themselves around this area.
You thought things would go smoothly, go even better and much quicker now that you and your boyfriend are finally patrolling together, months since you’ve transferred to this agency from your old one.
But Monoma’s been leaving any and every snide remark since you two stepped foot into the area, teasing you for any small mistake he believes should be (loudly) called out for or simply trying to mess up your way of doing things.
You don’t even want to count how many times he’s criticized the way your hero outfit currently looks on you. And no, you’re not getting insecure, but rather more… cautious.
There’s a reason why the uniform seems a bit odd around your crotch, but he doesn’t need to know that, not here, not now. Maybe until you both get home-
You trip, almost falling flat on your face if it weren’t for your boyfriend quickly grabbing you, pulling you up to your feet as he looks at you with panic before it quickly dissipates to his stupid mockery.
“See? You cannot do anything right, not without me at least. You, my dear, cannot live without me yet you still ignored me. This is what I mean when you should listen to me. Anyone would truly be grateful for having me, Phantom Thief, as their beloved lover.”
That’s it. You usually can take so much of his weird comments, but right now he’s pulling anything out of his ass at this point. (Soon you’ll see what actually comes out.)
You don’t answer, just look around to make sure no one is watching as you grab him by his stupid tie, dragging him to the nearest alleyway you remember passing by, glad it’s still pretty empty and dark enough to hide your bodies in the shadows.
He isn’t even struggling, just letting you walk him as if he’s a dog, quietly following you. If you were to turn around, you’d see the way his eyes are wide yet full of lust, his pupils dilated as he mentally cheers, thanking the gods for listening to his horny prayers of being sucked in an alleyway.
Do you know how hard it was for him to not jump you and beg you to help him? All because of how sexy you look in your hero outfit, how the small fixes and modifications bring out more of your body, the body he loves, yearns, desires, every day and night. Hopefully you don’t find his surprise before he can debut it once you guys are back home. (But unintentionally came prepared.)
He’s a complete fool for you, but you can’t know that, or else it’ll be the end of-
“Monoma Neito. You have 5 seconds to tell me why the fuck you’re being a piece of shit tonight.”
He didn’t realize his back is against a cold wall or how you’ve trapped him between your arms, the way you’re glaring at him while counting down in such a low tone, it makes his legs feel weak and threaten to buckle..
“Horny.” He barely whispers, crazed eyes never leaving your face as he stays still, trying to control his breathing and heartbeat as you scan him from head to toe, eyes finally staying in place where his boner is visible, even with how poor the lighting is.
You grin, but not your usual friendly grin or familiar flirty grin, but the ‘I’m gonna fuck you till you die’ kind of grin.
And Monoma’s both terrified yet super, duper much more hornier than before. But, with what are you going to fuck him with?
In a flash, he’s suddenly turned around, his clothed-covered chest pressing against the wall as he feels your hands make quick work on his belt, on his pants, pulling them down to rest on his thighs. He hisses and shivers when the cold air hits every exposed part of him, yet makes his dick twitch in interest.
You also free your bottom half to finally let out the strap on you’ve luckily managed to hide until now, searching your pockets for the small tube of lube you brought with you, just in case.
But when you spread his butt cheeks, you gasp in surprise with the butt plug he’s wearing, going to grab the toy as you slowly pull it out in disbelief.
Did he know?
“I-I want you to know you’re not the, um, only one to be prepared for what they want.” Monoma speaks, but in such a soft tone that it has you wondering if he’s the same person who had pestered you since the beginning of the patrol, the same boyfriend you love who has a talent for being loved and hated simultaneously by various people.
But at least he didn’t know. He simply decided to take this extra mile.
Cute. No wonder he’s such a good boy for mommy… sometimes.
“Then I guess I shouldn’t prepare you, right?”
You don’t wait for his response, not when you dispose of the toy away from you both, and you make quick work to lube up your silicone cock.
Monoma doesn’t get to ask you about the wet sounds behind him, or ask where you threw his butt plug before you’re entering him. You felt how his body jolted, his back arching enough to push his ass back more towards you.
You land a smack against the smooth skin, listening how the impact echoes in the empty alleyway and the way he whimpers in pain.
“You’re such a slut for mommy, aren’t you Monoma?”
“Yes!”
No hesitation.
Monoma usually sounds hesitant whenever you two do something new, as if he evaluates the pros and cons from anything and everything, figuring out if he’ll come out benefitted or you.
But he sounds desperate, shameless. He sounds like he’s ready to cry.
New, but not too surprising. When he wants to, he’ll always be a good boy for his mommy.
“Want to tell mommy again why you were being a little bitch tonight?”
Never mind, his hesitation came back, his mouth pressed shut as you peek at him, trying to catch a glimpse at his periwinkle eyes, wondering what’s taking him so long to answer. He answered you so easily, so quickly a few minutes ago.
You hear a soft mumble, see his lips move but no sound gets to your ears. So you spank him once more, hearing his cute squeak and the way he fucks back.
“Louder.”
“I wanted mommy to fuck me! Fuck me until I can’t walk! Fuck me until I’m just your stupid little hole! Please? I’ll-I’ll be good now, I promise!”
If anyone were to ask you just how stupid Monoma gets when he’s completely horny and turned on, this is a prime example. His usual eloquent vocabulary? Gone. It doesn’t exist once mommy’s pleasing him.
But he’s also promising about being good? Let’s see how good he’ll be then.
No more words are exchanged, just the soft desperate pants of the pretty blond and some small airy whines that leave his mouth in anticipation for what you’ll do next.
You don’t even start slow, you go absolutely feral.
He barely gets to inhale one last deep breath until you’re fucking that out of his lungs, his head turning to look back at you as best he could as his body begins hitting the wall in front of him, his clothes rubbing against the roughness of the bricked exterior of the unknown building. He lifts head enough to not get itself hit against the wall and his hands are clawing at the bricks desperately, trying to find leverage to hold on tightly, his brain struggling to catch up with how vicious yet delicious you’re fucking him.
When he does remember he’s a human who can speak words, he cries out “Mommy! Mommy! Mommy!” in such high pitches, it sounds like he’s singing, probably trying to continue seducing you into such a horny haze. His pent-up sexual frustration must have been infectious, with how you find yourself being merciless with him and his ass, your hips slamming into the back of his in such a brutal pace you wonder if the skin will bruise, if he’ll be able to sit or walk properly.
Probably not, but that’s the point, isn’t it?
Your baby boy wanted you to fuck the living shit out of him, so that’s what you’ll do, it’s what you’re best at doing.
Fuck the annoyance out of him so that when you guys get home, he passes out.
You momentarily forget you guys are very much still in public and even if it’s night, civilians are very much still awake and walking, either going back home or going to work, maybe hang out with their friends or find themselves a sub to fuck.
Monoma doesn’t even warn you that he’s cumming, not even his loud, prolonged whine of your name gets your attention. But with how he’s spasming around your toy, how his hips are twitching quickly in between your hands, his eyes that never left from looking at you crossing…
Yeah, since you missed that orgasm and you’re not in the mood to exactly punish him, why not fuck him some more until he can’t remember his name and only yours?
You briefly pause, the tip of the toy the only thing still inside of him as one of your hands rubs circles on his lower back and the other remains on his hip.
Through the panting, Monoma lets out a whine, one that sounds almost disappointed. Probably because he came far quicker than what either of you two expected, or because it feels like you’re pulling out already and calling it a night.
No words are exchanged as you watch him catch his breath for a bit more, memorizing how rosy his cheeks and nose look, how the blush looks like it’s on his neck while his white pupils are fully dilated, oozing his adoration for you.
When you hear him suck in a breath, whether he’s preparing a sentence or to finish pulling himself off the toy, you slam back into him, grinning like a maniac upon feeling how his whole body jumped, going back into action and having blood pump everywhere in him, mostly towards his reawakening dick.
And you slam, slam, slam, slamming into him at such a steady pace, making sure to roll your hips the way you know will make him start squealing in such a girly tone, or like a dirty pig he sometimes becomes.
And once you feel him begin to push back on you and one of his hands leave the wall, you lean forward, pushing his body more up on the wall. He’s bent too much, it’s obvious you’re fucking him doggy style. What if people decide to go through this alley?
He obeys but whines in complaint, not wanting you to stop your ministrations as he pulls himself together, standing up as much as he could as to leave his lower back still bent for you.
“Keep your hands on the wall or else I’ll leave you here like this.”
He loves it when you speak to him in such a low voice, in such a way that you know makes him want to suck your cock for days until his jaw hurts. He puts his hands back on the wall, both placed where his face is at, acting as support as he rests his forehead there. His neck hurts a bit from how long he’s been straining to look at you.
You go back to fucking him, going back to what you were doing, moaning his name repeatedly to keep riling him up, arouse him and make him start begging for you to go faster, harder, deeper, make him dirty.
And he does with loud wails, ones that have you freezing and stopping all together, slapping a hand on his mouth and whispering how he should quiet down, unless he wants to be whored to other people.
“Be mommy’s good boy and keep quiet. Unless you want someone else’s cock.”
“No! No muh-mommy! Only y-yours~ Please!” He moans, eyes rolling to the back of his head as he impatiently grinds against you, feeling how sticky his thighs are getting with sweat and some of his cum and precum, somehow.
“Mommy, fuck me more, please!” He whimpers so cutely, so pathetically, so melodically you’re sure he somehow copied someone’s siren quirk, because your head feels dizzy, your heart is beating erratically and your hips sync with the pulse, forgetting about being consistent with speed, with roughness, with how deep you reach inside of him.
Fucking him silly until he’s trying his best to muffle his screams and cries into the back of his hands pressed on the wall, his fingers trying so hard to find solace on them, to grasp the reality of him being defiled in an empty, dirty alleyway, pressed so ruthlessly against a wall he doesn’t know how exactly dirty it could be.
Monoma’s hiccuping your name until you spank him, growling softly how that’s not who you are, making him wail out “Mommy! Cumming!” in such an erotic way, you wonder if you’re fucking your boyfriend or a girl with how he’s managed to reach such an incredible pitch.
You keep going, and even when he’s done cumming, you don’t stop impaling him, and a hand goes to wrap itself around his dick, trying your best to match this chaotic fucking, hearing how he’s struggling to breath, to comprehend this painful yet electrifying pleasure.
His toes are curling in his shoes, his knees don’t stop buckling, his hips never stop trying to meet with yours, the burn of overstimulation flowing through his veins yet motivating his dick to keep going, to keep obeying, to not disappoint mommy.
Monoma’s speaking gibberish, babbling whatever nonsense and begging he could think of or come to make up, the tips of his fingers turning white with how hard they’re pressing against the bricks as he tries to not fall. He’s not sure how or why he’d fall, but with how you’re touching him, squeezing him, stroking him, playing with him, he’s ready to give into the inquiry of whether being a househusband would have you fucking him like this everyday.
It’s a weird thought, one he’s never had before, one that’s still early to even care about-
Oh my god you’re abusing his prostate!
He’s seeing stars, planets, flashing strobe lights and envisioning his uproaring third orgasm, mouth hung open stupidly as whiny sobs and strangled cries escape him, trying his best to keep quiet like you said but he can’t!
“Feels s’ good!” He slurs, once again turning his head to look at you, eyes completely wet as tears fall in graceful droplets, hair messed up and drool staining a bit of his chin.
And just as you were going to respond, you heard footsteps.
You both freeze: you’re halfway out of him while Monoma’s struggling to not let his coughing fit be heard, having swallowed his saliva far too quickly with the scare.
The sounds stop, but now you both can hear a female voice.
“Hello? Is anyone there?”
Monoma whimpers, embarrassed.
So this is how he’ll get caught and shamed.
This is the end of his career.
But you’re not having it, not with how his dick has stopped twitching and is starting to soften.
You’re not done yet, and neither is he.
“Answer, Monoma.” You harshly whisper, wiping your thumb over his hypersensitive tip, making him hiccup loudly before composing himself as best he could.
“Y-yes? It-It is I, Phantom Thief- ooh~”
Another voice pitches in.
“Phantom Thief? The Phantom Thief?!”
“Y-Yes!” Monoma squeaks out, trying to cover up his gasp as you begin to slowly fuck him, making sure to keep hitting him straight to the prostate, amused how he’s gripping his jaw, muffling his hiccups while frantically shaking his head, begging you with his eyes to no, no, please!
The two bystanders gasp, seemingly walking more towards where you and Monoma are, making you press him more into the wall, hoping the angle you’re both in and the small hiding spot is enough to keep you hidden.
“We’re huge fans of yours! But, um, are you alright? We heard someone crying.”
“Fuck!” Monoma whimpers, struggling to keep his breathing in check as you continue to move, even rolling your palm all over his tip, your other hand going to pull at one of his nipples.
“What was that?”
“N-nothing! I’m fin- ugh~”
“You… sure?”
“YES!”
Monoma yells, back arching as his head touches your shoulder, eyes rolling up this head as he’s torn between pushing back or bucking forwards, feeling his body submerged in such an intense heat, in such shame, in such pathetic desperation to cum, he’s begging you in quick hushed moans to please, pretty please, make him cum, he wants to cum, needs to cum again.
“And your fans?” You whisper teasingly, feeling how he shivers with how close your breath is near his ear.
“Fu-uck my fans-”
“Now now, that’s something you never said before. Did I fuck Monoma Neito out of you?”
And you go back with the brutal pace, not caring if the other two bystanders can hear what’s going on, not caring if they come out traumatized or probably aroused with how obvious it is that their dear Phantom Thief is getting fucked in a shady place, in a nasty place, yet he’s silently wailing and convulsing with everything you’re giving him.
Your hand soon enough gets sticky with what little cum his poor, weak body produced, his hole clenching tightly around your strap-on while his hands fly back to grasp any part of you that he could reach, which ended up being your head.
The bystanders speak again while Monoma’s busy wheezing his gratitude.
“Are you sure you’re alright? We could call the police-”
“I’m alright! ‘m fine~” He managed to sing-song, but if you heard a bit of his whimper seep from the last word, you don’t say anything, simply slow down your stroking before pausing.
You hear their footsteps slowly go back towards where they probably came from, making Monoma let out shaky exhales of relief and satisfaction, small giggles slipping from time to time as you kiss his neck, his cheek, his jawline.
And once you are certain you’re both alone again, you slowly pull out of him, helping him to turn around so that his back presses against the wall.
Until he grimaces.
“My essence is, from my deduction, splattered on this disgusting wall.”
You laugh, shaking your head as you point down to where his pants are, laughing harder when you see how his grimace turns into a face of disgust, horror, shame, surprise, arousal- wait what?
You don’t question the last one, simply letting out the last of your giggles while you search for the disinfectant wipes you tend to carry with you in your utility belt. And once they’ve been found, you make him lick your cum-covered hand first before properly passing a wipe. You hand Monoma one so that he cleans his face if needed, disinfect his hands, his thighs, anywhere he thought he needed to clean.
No, that's a lie. You took care of his thighs and pelvis, trying your best to clean the spots where his cum reached his pants before peppering a few gentle kisses around his exposed skin.
Pulling his briefs and pants up, buttoning, zipping, fasting his belts. You let out a happy sigh, fixing his hair and tie.
You then fix yourself.
“Who’s mommy’s good boy, Monoma?”
He somehow managed to chirp. “I am, mommy.”
“Then, you’ll stop being a bitch tonight, right? Mommy made sure to fuck it out of you.”
“Oh, um,” aw, he’s blushing. “I suppose…”
When you both walk away from the much-more defiled wall, you hold back an amused snort with how Monoma seems too unstable with his feet, how his legs seem to shake with every step he tries to take and how frustrated he looks with how uncooperative his body is.
You decide that chilling and cuddling in that corner wouldn’t be so bad, and considering how your shift ended minutes ago, you doubt either you or Monoma will get into trouble.
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nincompoopydoo · 3 years ago
Note
Could I request a oneshot with Remus Lupin with the promt "kiss me so i can feel alive again". Also congratulations on 1000 followers 🎉✨💕
ALIVE AND TRUE
PAIRING: Remus Lupin x reader WORD COUNT: 2k (whoops) SUMMARY: Having found a lost friend, living in the countryside of Yorkshire, feelings of once hidden affection start to bloom in the need to be alive and good things to be real. A/N: Thank you for requesting and I’m so sorry for taking so long! This is one of my favorites because it’s so soft and romantic and I adore this request. Please tell me what you think of it xo. WARNINGS: Angst. support my writing through ko-fi💖 MASTERLIST
It’s the house you see from trudging down the walkway that forces you to double take your previous steps. Silent and empty, it seems to twist into the forest from afar. Bent trees adorn the lane with overgrown greenery at its feet and ancient brick walls that run along with it. The fields in Yorkshire are vast and immaculate but right now, you are alone and suddenly the far stretch of land doesn’t seem to have the shine of the countryside. Your eyes shift to the house that sits behind a rusted gate, joints barely holding together from the years of rotting and exposure to the heat and rain. It’s barely a house but more of a cottage. No, it’s not even a cottage. Semi-derelict and tumbledown, it looks more like the ruins of what used to be a home.
You look down to the note in your hand, parchment torn at the edges with the cursive words of your handwriting that make up an address and coordinates. Visually, there’s no indication of where exactly you are but according to the coordinates, you are precisely where you need to be. For the past three years, your investigation into finding your friend has proven to be impossible and almost met with the acceptance that you will never see him again. Yet, after an anonymous tip had been owled to your doorstep, indicating the suspicions of the presence of a werewolf somewhere in Yorkshire as overheard by the locals of a nearby town, gave you a tinge of hope to reconnect with someone you lost.
The sight bears a high chance that he may be hiding here, unfortunately. It makes it hard to believe that someone you saw had so much life in him, is living in this condition.
Anxiety starts to creep onto you as you push the worn-down gate. It creaks with the rustling of the wind, a sign of an imminent storm. The sun doesn’t shine anymore, clouds of grey congregate in the skies above in the chorus of rainfall. You don’t do too well with apparition, thankfully having only lost half of your hair during the war. Hence, if the anonymous tip turns out to be a fake, you would have to make your way out of the countryside in the rain or even worse, take the Knight Bus.
You hate the Knight Bus.
Attempting to conjure up whatever courage you have left, you steadily make your way into the compound, plodding through the overgrown grass. As you grow closer, the cottage looks even worse than it was from afar, climbing plants of dull green embellish the walls of the ruins.
Then, in your periphery, you catch a glimpse of violet—Bluebells. The same flowers that used to grow on the forest floor of the forbidden forest. You remember him telling you about how he had seen a white bluebell, rare to its nature.
Warmth fills your chest, you know he is here.
The door is wooden, climbing plants seem to have made their way to it, branching around its handle.
You knock once. No answer.
You knock twice. There’s footsteps, they’re heavy.
With the swing of the door, you are met with none other than Remus Lupin. He looks older, dark circles below his eyes that have lost their intensity of blue, hair unkempt and shabby, and a beard, tracing along his jawline. He has his wand directed to you in defense. Probably because no one ever visits.
The smile on your face is impossible to suppress. It's bright at the recognition of the familiarity of his face. “Remus,” you breathe, eyes crinkling and gleaming with the bliss from the effort and worth of your investigation to find this very man, who stands just a couple of inches away from you. You swallow, not wanting to blink away the possibility that this may all be a dream. “I’ve been looking everywhere for you.”
He says your name through a whisper like it’s the answer to the millions of prayers recited and uttered from his lips as he drifts off to slumber under the moonshine, beaming through the shattered glass of the windows by his bedside. He dreams of you, often in times when his body is too weak to endure the aftermath of a full moon.
Yet, you're here and very real.
Then, he watches your grin falter and how your eyes move around the curves of his face. The deep cuts are there and visible. Although magic heals, time and energy play a crucial factor in healing wounds. In an instant, his apprehension creeps in, and suddenly, he feels small. The memories of you are forever intertwined with the rest of his friends, memories too painful to endure.
Your hand reaches out for his face but he staggers back in his step.
“You shouldn’t be here.”
He doesn’t mean it. Remus really wants you here. To feel your warmth, your touch, the smell of your hair and to hold you but he sees the way you bring your arm down to your side, shoulders slump in near defeat. In reality, you would never let him go that easily.
“Don’t say that, Remus.”
The crinkle of your eyes is gone, now sharp with the frustration of his tendency of locking himself away from the world out of paranoia. It’s been a minute since you’ve seen his face after three long years and he’s already trying to chase you away.
Typical Remus.
An odd sense of nausea takes over him, knees buckling as his surroundings begin to spin like he is on a sailing boat at sea. His body is frail and with a blow, he will fall. His eyes are trained on you as he feels his feet give way and his body drifting towards the ground. Just then, he feels your touch, arms around him like an embrace. You’re holding him in his weakened stance, stabilizing his balance by moving his arm to hang around your shoulder. He immediately shifts his weight on you, uttering a soft apology.
“You don’t have to apologize for something you can't control.” Your voice is soothing, speaking so close to his ear. Your tone is laced with knowing and care. You both know those words have been articulated from your very lips many times before. And your hands are gentle upon the curve of his waist, against the rough material of a dress shirt but your grasp is strong—the true touch of a healer’s hands, precise and careful. Remus always knew you would turn to become a highly-skilled healer.
With every cautious step, the creaks of the parquet flooring are loud and lasting. It’s as if the house itself cries for its condition, like a child with a wound to their knee after taking a nasty fall. The wailing wind outside doesn’t help with the fact that everything seems to be falling apart.
You guide him to the armchair by the fireplace, pressing him by the shoulders to sit. He plops onto the chair with a heavy sigh and feels a sense of regret sinking in his chest at the sight of the visible scowl of your lips and the turn of your brows.
Your open palm finds his cheek. He hears the drag of your deep exhale. You don’t say anything, only to pull out your wand from your back pocket. Yet, Remus is quick to grab your hand, halting you in your movement. Your frown a little deeper, sharp eyes finding him.
“Just let me heal you. It’s the least I can do.”
It’s a promise, a vow, uttered from your very lips filled with dignity and hope. So, he lets you, just to feel you close to him.
The rain is yet to arrive. Thunder booming through rolling clouds above and still not a single drop of rain but there’s a peak of sunlight between the cracks of the storm. Maybe, it’s because you’re here and sunshine always seems to trail your steps, no matter where they lead.
Now, Remus is seated on the toilet seat facing you, who has settled for a shaky stool to perch on as your gentle hands hold the edge of his jaw while the other grips onto a straight razor, gazing along the cheek. He cannot take his eyes off the crease between your brows and the way your eyes slowly shift along with the moving blade.
Magic is meant for convenience in small but necessary tasks like these yet you insisted on doing it in the traditional muggle way—using your fingers. Your hands work wonders, beautifully moving as a paraclete. You hold him like you’re maintaining his strength, to keep from fracturing into pieces. You look at him like he’s your masterpiece, carving every curve and bend of his skin and structure.
You lift the blade away from his face, dabbing it onto a rag cloth hung by the sink. Remus finally finds the time to speak. “You don’t have to do this.” You simply laugh and it comes out like a puff of air. Your eyes are still trained on cleaning off the razor. “Of course, I don’t. But, I also don’t want you competing with Dumbledore’s beard.”
Remus laughs, truly laughs. It’s loud and echoes within the walls of the tiny toilet. “I could never beat him.” You’re laughing too, grin wide as ever. Then, after a beat of silence, your grin suppresses into a small smile, lips pressed together as you place the razor aside. You’re clearly in deep thought.
“Come away with me.”
Remus blinks. “What?”
You turned to him, eyes glinting with expectancy. “Stay with me. I live a few blocks from St Mungos...and you get to see me at work.” You watch how his mouth is now agape, half of his chin still in shaving cream.
“And I’m sure you look magnificent in green but you know I can’t—”
“You can, Remus. You can come here a week before the full moon and then come back to my place. I’ll help you heal, a lot faster and you know that’s true. Maybe, I could get hold of aconite for Wolfsbane at the hospital— ”
You hadn’t realized your rambling until Remus began to shake you by the shoulders, calling out your name with an odd sense of serenity and hint of urgency for you to stop. So, your words immediately halt with a turn of your head to meet his gaze. Your expression is soft. His hand drifts to yours, holding it in his. “You know I can’t because if they find out you are living with someone with lycanthropy, you will lose your job and I don’t want you to lose it for my sake,” he squeezes your hand with assurance. “But, thank you. Thank you for always being so kind to me.”
The candle flickers from behind you, sitting idly on the ceramic shelf above the sink. No sunlight beaming through the room and only the hues of flame, beginning to shrink with the melting of its wax. Your hair presents an illusion of golden threads against the candlelight, face as warm as your hand on his as you shift your fingers to the back of his palm. Gradually, you sigh whilst raising his palm to you and press your lips to the arch of his hand. It’s quick but affectionate.
Your stare is strong and his heart stutters for the millionth time since your arrival.
Remus is drawn to you and the thought of how your lips should be on his. He drifts closer, eyes roaming your face, feeling your breath against his skin.
“Can I kiss you?” your question is soft, a whisper, only for his ears. A secret so sacred that you’re afraid nature would hear the words of your confession that was solely reserved for your mind and the man you are confessing to. He nods, it’s slight but it’s true, feeling like this is all a dream. He doesn’t want you to dream anymore. For you are here, hand tangled in his, thinking about his lips on yours.
Then, he whispers as the candle flickers once more. “Kiss me so I can feel alive again.”
So, you do. You kiss him, gentle and sweet, your hand still in his.
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genshin-impacted · 4 years ago
Text
lost & found // Diluc x Reader (1/3)
Word Count: ~3.3k 
Notes: GN!Reader, Seelie!Reader, Diluc/Reader, what more can I say? You’re a cute seelie following Diluc around
Summary: Vaguely remembering the time when you were once human, you are a mini seelie roaming the outskirts of Mondstadt when you find Diluc and decide to follow him-- though he does his share of following you too, through the best and worst of your adventures together. 
“You’re more of a radar for trouble than treasure, aren’t you,” Diluc says rather than asks you, though his fondness is clear to see. You can only do a bashful swirl in response. 
-
Alternatively: As a seelie, you’re terrible at leading Diluc towards treasure without running into hoards of hilichurls or enemies alike, but he follows you anyways. 
[Part 2]
.
.
You are a seelie. 
You aren’t quite sure what that is, but you know for a fact that the wispy reflection that you see in the lake is you. No hands, no legs, no head, no heart-- though you remember when you had all that before. You can feel yourself breathe, but you also know you would be fine without it. You touch the water and vaguely feel its coolness and register that it is wet, but you aren't sure what is touching the water or how you know what it feels like. 
You are able to fly. You rise, and you fall, and you twirl in midair, and you know you have never been able to do this until now. "This is nice," you find yourself saying, but your voice comes out garbled and high, so you stop. You suppose losing your speech is the price to pay for the power of flight.
You don't know how long you wandered until you find something familiar to you. In a land of slimes, aggressive flowers, and crystalized butterflies, it's hard for you to take everything in at once. But you can recognize a human when you see one. (It would be difficult not to. You were once human, too, if you can remember.)
The human is strikingly distinct as far as humans go. With bright red hair, the man in black leans against the tree by the lakeside and watches the water lap up against the short cliff. You don't make snap judgments, not usually, but when you see the man in black, you can't help that your first thoughts are that he looks lonely.
You float to him steadily from what you hope is outside of his sight, curious enough to approach and observe what you can of him without being seen. 
Except, the moment you fly near him, he looks directly at you. (Apparently, you glow, if the light that you shine on his face is not enough of an indicator of your bioluminescence.)
You freeze in mid-air, or as much as you can as a globby orb of light. You wait with bated breath as he watches you as intently as you watched him, and you take a glimpse at what your light has allowed you to see: bright red eyes to match his hair. (You've never seen so much red on a person. And red-red too, not just the orange-y red you've seen people with.) 
Not knowing what else to do, you decide to do a somersault. (You think if you were still a human, you’d attempt to crack a joke or start a conversation to break the ice, but alas.)
You expect him to start doing something-- anything. But the man continues to look at you, though with less of a guarded expression and more of a curious one instead. 
You almost feel offended by the strange look he gives you, but then you see his lips uplift into a small smile and you forgive him. For good measure, you twirl in the air and, when he simply follows you with his eyes, you circle around his head like a halo.
"You're a different type of seelie, aren't you?" He says, his arms still crossed when you fly down to smush your face against the red gem at his collar and the Vision at his waist. You loop around his legs and try to lift his fur-lined coattails, only for him to lift it up himself and shoot you a raised brow. "Did you want me to follow you?"
Follow you? You wonder, why would he want to follow you? You don't think you have anywhere to be, let alone anywhere to lead him to. 
Now how to convey that to him…
The red-head watches you as you shake yourself side-to-side in what you hope looked like the shake of a head. "Ah… That's a no, then. I see," he says. He chuckles when you chirp in joy, looping up again. 
He pushes himself off the tree and walks on the path, toward the mansion in the distance. You follow closely behind him. A few steps in, he turns to you-- and you almost feel bashful enough to droop in height.
"Are you following me on purpose?" He asks.
You swirl up and eagerly bob your head. You wish you could ask, but the only thing you can do is trill-- which seems to do the trick when you hear the man huff in amusement before beginning to walk again. "Well, hurry up then," he says, and you chirp once before speeding up to catch to him in record-speed flying. 
(If you accidentally crash into his back at your eagerness, you think the shake of his shoulders in his laughter is only good signs of the beginning of a friendship.)
.
.
.
You hope the man you’ve decided to follow doesn't mind that all you can do is trill and twirl in the air. You make for a poor partner in conversation, considering you cannot supply the words to respond, but you think he at least finds you amusing at least if the small smile on his face is anything of note. You think he looks rather charming like that, as opposed to his straight-faced somberness when he was alone. Very mysterious, you think to yourself, must be popular.
When you follow him and see groves of grapevines and a mansion of formidable size, you think perhaps his rugged handsomeness and broodingly mysterious nature aren’t his only charm points. 
(You wonder if you can eat. You press where you think your mouth should be onto a bunch of grapes only to be disappointed by a lack of action. 
"What are you doing?" The man's voice calls out to you, amusement laced into his words. You turn around and speed back to him, feigning innocence.) 
The two of you enter the confines of Dawn Winery-- or so you read from a sign. You watch curiously as your mysterious man waves his hand in greeting when a few maids bow respectfully and follow him into the back where a man waits by a wheelbarrow.
"Master Diluc," the man says, and you are elated to finally put a name to a face you've followed for a while now. The winery employee looks past him at you, and you instinctively hedge closer to Diluc, almost hiding behind his hair. "Is that… a seelie?"
"So it seems," Diluc replies, crossing his arms. He takes a look at you. "Though it has yet to guide me anywhere."
You let out an extended squeak of indignance that makes him laugh, uncrossing his arms before he turns back to the worker at hand to discuss business. 
You'll show him, you think huffily. You can guide him somewhere-- it's in your bones (metaphorically). You found him, didn't you? You reason, surely there is something innately Seelie about you that will lead him somewhere.
Most seelies, as you have learned from watching Diluc follow the larger blue seelies, guide people to a treasure chest or some kind of monetary reward for leading them back to their seelie courts. You wonder if they are programmed to know where they are supposed to go and if there is a natural pull to a certain place. You wonder if it's anything like your wandering curiosity similar to that of a child, hoping to see what lies ahead and barreling forth. 
Either way, you take the lead and Diluc follows you out into Teyvat.
And he follows you right into enemy territory.
The first time feels like an accident, and after Diluc destroys the encampment, he finds a box of artifacts as a reward for his battle prowess. (You've never seen so much burnt grass.) The second time you guide him into enemy territory feels like a coincidence. They were next to each other, and hey, Diluc is able to find an exquisite chest this time filled to the brim with mora.
The third time around, it is hard to argue otherwise.
"You're more of a radar for trouble than treasure, aren't you," Diluc comments, settling down onto a log as you (metaphorically) bury your head into your hands. To convey such emotion as a seelie, you droop to the ground as flat as you could possibly be at his feet.
"I'm kidding," he says, watching with quipped lips as you rise from the ground moodily. "We did get some treasure out of it, so it wasn't a total loss." He reaches out with his hand to gently brush over your front as he would a cat-- and you react as a cat would, preening into his hand. He lets out a huff of laughter. "Affectionate, aren't you?"
You do a bashful swirl.
.
.
.
You realize soon enough that most people would not call Diluc private or stoic. Charming, a man with a way with his words, succinct, and pleasant are only a few things you've heard people say about him. And you were right-- he is a popular man if the eyes that follow him and the dreamy sighs that come after he leaves is of any indication.
The mysteriously cool Diluc you meet on the first day is vastly different from the man that everyone else interacts with on a day to day basis. He's not charming all the time, but he has a way about him that exudes confidence and almost an elitist composure. In some ways, you are glad-- you don't have to hide away behind his collar or in his hair (you still do this, if you're honest, just because his hair is so fluffy), afraid to mar his pristine reputation as a local bad boy. And in other ways, you are a bit smug, to know a side of Diluc that he shows to very few people.
Kaeya is one of those few people you have seen Diluc act anything less than amicable towards. 
"I was hoping one day you would have someone at your side but I have to admit, Master Diluc," Kaeya says, propping his face on his hand in amusement, "this is not quite what I imagined."
You let out a titter of laughter at the difference between the two men's expressions as Kaeya pokes at your little translucent ears. Kaeya looks at you with mesmerizing amusement as Diluc glares at Kaeya over his wiped-clean glass like he would like to do nothing else but break it over the other's head. ("It wouldn't hurt that much," Kaeya tells you flippantly. "Not as much as the hangovers his drinks give me.")
"Don't you have somewhere better to be?"
"Not really, no." Kaeya replies, feigning hurt, "Why, don't want me here?"
"Never."
Kaeya gives you a pointed look akin to a puppy. "His words are colder than my Vision, mini seelie," he says to you. "Careful not to get frostbite now."
"You have the privilege of having earned my ire," Diluc says shortly. "Also," he slaps Kaeya on the back of his hand when he goes to pull at your ears, "stop that."
"Protective, aren't you?" Kaeya chuckles, watching as you gaze up at Diluc adoringly. "I think you're one phrase away from telling me to get my own mini seelie."
At this, you let out a long coo, flying up to bop Kaeya gently on his nose before going over to Diliuc and rubbing your face onto his cheeks. You hear Diluc let out another breath of laughter, and you feel his hand press you closer to him. “Are you comforting me?” He asks in amusement, and for once, he does not berate Kaeya for joining in with his laughter. 
“The pair the two of you make,” Kaeya drawls, picking up his glass of Death After Noon. “You’d fight wars for each other, wouldn’t you?”
Of course you would, you think, though there was very little you could do as a seelie-- and you forget that at times. 
To be fair, most of the time, Diluc didn’t seem to treat you any less than his traveling companion. You’re only reminded when you float on your own when he’s cleaning up the tavern and get chased by cats and birds alike, only to come flying home to Diluc blubbering about your near-death experiences (though was it even possible for you to die?). And when you try to, in attempts to help Diluc out, scold a rowdy customer into behaving by slamming your body into their face rapidly without doing any damage whatsoever.   
The two of you-- Seelie and Uncrowned King of Mondstadt-- were a pair of renown. (“Two peas in a pod,” Venti would say the first time you led Diluc to him at Starsnatch Cliff, and “always together like bread and butter,” he said to you two the second time you find him near Starfell Lake. And “are you two following me?” when Venti walks into the tavern for the third consecutive meeting.) And if you ever doubted that Diluc cared for you, you had to look no further than when you were stolen from Diluc’s side by treasure hoarders who didn’t know any better.
It is in these moments where you are viscerally reminded that you are a seelie-- a being meant to guide people to treasures-- and not what you have been for the past few-- weeks? months? by Diluc’s side. You realize that you’ve never been hurt in this form before when you are kidnapped. It didn’t occur to you that you could feel any pain, and you wonder why not when you can feel the softness of Diluc’s hair and the warmth of his hand-- all gentle, loving gestures. Being squeezed by the treasurer hoarder’s hand feels suffocating, like your lungs being crushed under a massive, unrelenting weight.
It is not pleasant, to say the least, especially when they threaten you to take them to treasure that you know you cannot locate. 
Or can you? 
With convincing pulses of light, as though you’re approaching actual riches, you lead them where you lead people (or rather, just Diluc) best. 
The enemies of your enemies are your friends; you watch as an axed mitachurl spins around, chasing after the treasurer hunters who with varying degrees of fear, run away. They would have gotten away scot-free if they had not run into Diluc who had somehow found you before you could come back to him.
His phoenix burns bright especially in the moonless night, and Diluc takes care of two enemy camps that night. 
“Clever,” he says, making you preen, “leading them here. They really didn’t know what they signed up for when they started following you, did they?”
How did you find me? You trill, twirling around. And there should be no reasonable way for Diluc to understand what you’re trying to say, but he does anyways. 
“I just did what you usually do for me,” Diluc says, putting his hand up so you can gently land on it. Your glow illuminates his face in the softest shade of color. You watch as his lips turn up into a small smile. “I led myself to wherever the trouble was and knew I’d find you.” 
(Diluc will never tell you this for as long as you are a seelie, but the moment you do not come back to him when he finishes up his shift at Angel’s Share, his stomach drops. It shouldn’t have been hard to spot you, a glowing light, amongst the quiet, softly lit streets of Mondstadt, but he gives the city a quick lookover and cannot find you. 
He learns about the treasure hoarders from his connections and does not hesitate to take his broadsword with him and go looking for you. 
He runs into two other treasure hoarder camps and fights three groups of slimes before he finds the hilichurl camp you’ve led the hunters into, beyond relieved to see your familiar light in the distance.)
From that night, Diluc finds a mini seelie (you), sixteen anemo sigils, an old broadsword, mora, and a few treasure hunter insignias left behind. He gives you a sunsettia even though the both of you know you cannot eat, and you sit together at the edge of a cliff, watching the moon come out from its hiding place within the clouds. 
You have never felt safer.
.
.
.
You don’t really sleep, but every night you take your place by Diluc’s pillow and let time pass you by. Time feels different as a seelie, especially when you do not have Diluc to ground you to the schedule of a normal person. 
Though, if you were honest, it isn’t as though Diluc keeps regular hours himself. How many times have you bullied (read: squeaked at) him into turning in before dawn? How many times have you pressed your entire translucent body onto his face so he can take the hint to finally take a break? You vaguely remember being a human, and you think you should be abhorred by the amount of sleep Diluc isn’t taking, considering how good sleep can feel. 
On the bright side, Diluc has gotten more used to your antics that it only takes a little nagging from your end for him to turn the desk lamp off.
“You’re quite persistent,” he comments, following you with his eyes as you press your body into various spots in the ceiling above him. “I can’t tell if I’ve been blessed or cursed with you as some sort of guardian.”
Guardian seelie, you titter, spinning around with your ears outstretched as though you were an angel. Special isekai seelie, you laugh to yourself, and Diluc only watches you fondly as you float down. 
"’Stripped of all that the body once held close and the soul once held dear, song and memories are all that now remain of yesteryear,’” Diluc recites quietly as you look up to him. “‘The last singers-- the first Seelie-- they played their final tune in the halls of angels.’" 
What is that?
“It’s a song I remember hearing when I was a child,” he says, “about seelies and their origins. I don’t remember if there was anything else, but it came to me today when I was thinking of you.” You wait for him to continue as he dims the light, your glow the only thing illuminating the room other than the moon. “Most seelies want to go back to their seelie courts… but it doesn’t seem as though you want to.” He pauses. “Or is it that you don’t have a court to go back to?”
You stay silent. 
“Sorry, forget what I said. It doesn’t matter in the end anyways.” Diluc scoops you up from his lap to place you at your usual place on the other pillow by his head. You softly trill when he gently pets you, and whether you mean to or not, you glow just a bit brighter for a moment.
“Even if one day you decide to leave, the winery will always be open to you,” he says. “Adeleine and the rest of the maids will recognize you and let you in-- though I suppose the entirety of Mondstadt knows who you are by now so I guess I don’t have to worry about that, do I?” He smiles when you coo softly.
“Good night,” Diluc says to you, as he does every night, and sleeps knowing you cannot say it back in words, though he understands you regardless every time.
If you weren’t a seelie, would you have been able to be as close to Diluc as you are now? Would he still have cared about you to the extent he does now?
Even if these questions did not have the answers you wanted to hear, you think to yourself, as your heart warms (though you have no heart) from the sight of seeing Diluc’s even rise and fall of his chest, that you wish that you’d one day be able to say ‘good night’ back to him.
.
You can only watch the moon rise and dream.
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enamouredfae · 3 years ago
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♡ Pick a Card ♡
What you need to know in order to be ready for the love you so longingly seek!
This reading is looking at anything you might need to heal or grow into in order to enter future relationships as your higher self. I am not looking at your future, but simply trying to guide you towards your highest good in the field of love. Many of us have internalized certain perceptions of love that we must unlearn, or have lived through difficult moments which have closed us off or made experiencing love more difficult. If you are in a toxic relationship/situation, please do not take any messages that might seem to tell you to stay in it. With this reading, I will hopefully open you up to some introspection and hopefully growth. You may very well be attracted to multiple piles and that is ok! Read all that attract you and take what resonates. Each pile has three pieces of advice, so mixing and matching is invited!
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This reading is for entertainment purposes only.
This is a timeless reading for the collective, therefore it is likely that some messages will not resonate with you. Please only take the messages that do! The messages that do not, are meant for somebody else. Remember that the future is never set in stone and that you possess free will! Love you! ♡
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Pile 1
Charm: Knot
1. Yang
Yang tells me that you need to learn to become more proactive in love. You cannot wait around. You must act! You need to manifest your desires into the material world by doing. It's perfectly fine to do the first move, no matter what society deems "acceptable", it is even invited with this card.
23. Peace
Radical acceptance is necessary for inner peace and in this case for a higher love. You must first love yourself fully, light and shadow self, before loving someone else in the way that you both deserve! And you deserve radical acceptance, we are all flawed and intricate people! As long as we are willing to change and grow and put in the work, past mistakes can be atoned for.
38. To be fair
This card tells me that you need to learn to be more balanced in relationships. Are you giving more than the other parties? Are you giving less? We must be fair to both others and ourselves. When someone in the relationship gives more, they may feel underappreciated which can become unmotivating, but they can also overwhelm the other person. You must learn balance.
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Pile 2
Charm: Cactus
7. To the sea (reversed)
"When fishermen cannot go to sea, they stay at home and repair their nets." This is a quote from the guidebook that I had to rewrite here because it encapsulates the advice perfectly. You probably long for love like fishermen long for the sea. This card is telling me that the problem isn't coming from you, but the external world. An idea that just popped up in my head is a queer teen living in a homophobic area or with homophobic parents, so it is likely that this could be your situation. If it is, I love you, please take care of yourself, love and better days will come, don't worry! But you must wait a while longer until the external world matches your vibration, perhaps you'll have to move, wait until you're safe to go out to the sea. Until then, go with the flow.
50. No place like home (reversed)
This card seems to work perfectly with the previous one, it reminds us that what is familiar isn't always the best, because it keeps us from growing. If you want change, you can't keep going to the same things/people that haven't worked before, it's counterintuitive. It is natural to go back to what's familiar, but try something new. Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. Choose unfamiliar.
34. A leg up (reversed)
You are carrying the burden of your world all alone. You probably don't feel safe sharing what you feel, or are very uncomfortable with vulnerability. To be honest with you, right before writing this part of the reading, I started tearing up, you are holding in so much hurt... You need to voice your struggles, being vulnerable is proof of immense strength, believe me! I know it's hard! Start little by little with someone you really trust!
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Pile 3
Charm: Star
35. Loyal Heart
Ok if one pile is ready for the beginning of a relationship it's this one. It is the perfect time for you to create loyal commitments. It is possible that you are already in a committed relationship, but at the very least you are surrounded by loyal, devoted people. Don't forget to be devoted and loyal in return!
4. Higher Power (reversed)
This card is inviting you to trust in whatever divine power you believe in, trust that the universe is divinely guiding you and protecting you. I feel like if a certain religion or spiritual path attracts or fascinates you, you should start looking into it, careful with being disrespectful or appropriating it, especially with closed practices, please do your research! But connecting to Source would be beneficial to you in the long run!
25. Round and Round
You are stuck in a cycle that you must break. Do not worry, you shouldn't feel bad, it's all part of the learning process. Remember: you've been through this before, think back on how that made you feel the previous times, are you sure you want to go through that again? Breaking this cycle is a form of self-care, and you need to care for yourself! You are subconsciously punishing yourself by staying in this cycle, try thinking about the root of why you're doing so! It could help you in breaking it!
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Pile 4
Charm: "Love"
8. The tribe
You may want to find your tribe, or you have recently found it. You might feel like you finally belong, or are longing for that feeling. Whenever I get this card, I think of the astrology/witchcraft/tarot community here! It may be the same for you! You are welcome here, and hopefully, you feel like you belong! Contributing to any community that you are passionate about, whether online or in real life, will bring you great joy and satisfaction. Your tribe awaits and needs you! It's possible that that's where you'll find love as well!
6. Not for you (reversed)
Let them go. Whoever you first thought of, it's time to stop obsessing over them. "Don't chase after what flees you." I'm sure you realize this is not serving you, but how do you stop? This card is suggesting radical acceptance and surrender, that this is a sign that someone or something much better is waiting for you. I suggest reminding yourself that they aren't perfect and that you have just come to idealize them.
52. Mending (reversed)
You are very likely going through a grieving period right now. There is so much hurt and disappointment. "Heartbreak is a strange healer of souls." It may feel awful now, but trust that when you look back one day, you will see that the hurt you're feeling now, transformed you in a powerful way. This card is inviting you to accept the heartbreak and push through it, situations like this open us up to seeing the world in a new way, to growing. Better days are coming!
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Pile 5
Charm: Angel
28. Building blocks (reversed)
Are you acting according to your belief system? Are you following the advice you give others? You must look carefully at your core foundation. It seems to me that you have done a lot of inner growth, but are still stuck in your old ways. Your outer self isn't matching your inner self. Start doing what you preach!
47. Go the distance
I feel like you're someone that wants love right now! For it to come fast and smoothly, like a sprint. You must learn to see love more realistically, as a long-distance race of endurance. You may be the type to immediately run at the sight of a problem. You must learn to be dedicated and work in love, it won't always be the idealized version you keep reading about or watching. Love demands work!
32. Here and Now (reversed)
You live in the past, don't you? So much regret and nostalgia... Or perhaps you live in the future? Daydreams and ambition. There is a need to learn to live in the here and now, you cannot change the past, and the future is infinite. They're both elusive, and unreliable; now is tangible, real, and full of immediate possibilities.
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Pile 6
Charm: Mars Symbol
22. Blessed
This beautiful card talks about an unexpected and "unearned" wonderful event, that seems like divine intervention, a gift from the universe. The advice I take from this card is to practice gratitude because you seem to be blessed in the love department. Perhaps you already know who "the one" is for you. If you don't, trust that the universe has someone wonderful for you!
31. Why?
Ask yourself why you feel as you do about/in love? It is time for some introspection. You need to think and identify unhealthy patterns in your love life. Why do you act as you do in a relationship? Identify what in your past has caused this behavior. It won't solve the problem right away, but it's a good first step. Understanding the problem will be validating.
27. Exchanging gifts (reversed)
"Be careful what you pray for because you might just get it." You need to be ready for the energy exchange that will happen if this happens. This card talks about an imbalance between giving and receiving. You must learn that if you receive a lot, you must return a lot, love needs to be balanced. If you give more, you aren't actually in control, the other party could be consciously or unconsciously taking advantage of your generosity!
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Pile 7
Charm: Eternally Open Heart Locket
17. The Fates
You must learn to accept that there are things and people you simply cannot control and change. You cannot blame yourself for things beyond your control, nor can you blame others for things they cannot control. Just be wise enough to tell the difference between things one can control and things one cannot!! If you have a tendency to mold people into your ideal, making them lose their essence, you must learn to accept people for who they are. It is not your job to change them: the desire to change must come from them, for them.
15. Message in a bottle
Try asking for specific signs from the universe, or start becoming more aware of them. Synchronicities are all around you, they're the way that the universe confirms that you're on the right path! Listen carefully to those you communicate with, they could be delivering a cledon to you. This card itself is a good sign, a favorable answer to the question occupying your mind.
9. Treasure Island
You might've already, but if you haven't, MANIFEST YOUR LOVE!! You will be greatly rewarded when you embrace the law of attraction and your intuition. Depending on your belief in how manifestation works, try being mindful of free will! If you believe that love spells on specific people are influencing their free will, then it is immoral to manifest a specific person. If you don't believe that that is how manifestation works, do as you will, just be in line with your beliefs! This card is also a great sign, you're on the right path, and have good fortune on your side. Very lucky pile!!
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Pile 8
Charm: Boot
2. Yin (reversed)
You must learn to receive, only being the giver isn't good for you. You deserve to receive! Be open to embodying yin and yang equally. "You stop the flow of abundance when you constantly insist upon being the giver." Be the listener, the one that learns, the one that is being led.
33. Chaos and Conflict
You may be afraid of chaos and conflict, but you must remember that they can rid you of what's no longer serving you. Conflict also implies two sides, remember that yours isn't the only one, and conflict can lead to mutual understanding. Learn to put up boundaries, but also to respect those of others. When you finally see the potential of healing that conflict can cause, you'll be ready for mature communication in relationships.
20. Imagine
Remember that you can create what you imagine! Your imagination is powerful in manifesting your desires, but it can't do everything for you! Manifestation is work, when an opportunity arises, act! This card can also be a sign that the person you're manifesting will be entering your life soon. When they appear, don't just wait, and daydream! The imagination part of manifesting is done, now it's time to act.
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Pile 9
Charm: Knife
21. Clean it up
It's time to let go and declutter your mind. Think about what is no longer serving you, about the things that only overwhelm you, and make you overthink, they aren't good for you. It might also help you to declutter in general, your house, your closet, your phone, your feed, etc. Make room for the new and the better.
48. Poised (reversed)
Think carefully, are you really ready for love right now? Because this card is telling me that you aren't. It's ok to be a "late bloomer", and it's important to be ready for love, as to not hurt the one you love, and yourself. Being single isn't a sign of "failure", it gives you the time and space to focus on yourself, on your growth, on your healing, on exploring and understanding yourself. Being single can seem like a curse, but it's a blessing, it's what you need right now.
16. All that glitters
Are you being yourself in love? Are they? Don't succumb to the power of superficiality. Either let go of the mask or look beyond theirs! "Imagine that all the glitter is gone. Would you still desire the object or person?" If one falls for the glitter, what will happen on the day they forgets to glue it on?
Thank you for reading! Love you all.♡
You can buy me a coffee if you feel called to do so! This is never necessary, but always appreciated! ♡
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