#when will this fucking cold go away I hate this sm
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me, fully conscious of the fact I am overworking myself while literally sick: haha, jon sims moment
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rueclfer · 2 months ago
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neopet graveyard // shigaraki tomura
when you two always end up working the night shift together.
a/n: all together now! "finaaallllyyyyy" we collectively say. i love shiggy sm this fucking loser is the loml. <3
my smau warm up for this fic here too
@bbluefllame hehe
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12:37 AM the buzzing analog clock sitting on the counter glared back at you. Long and slow shifts like tonight's were agonizing to get through. You may have been getting paid to sit around and flip through dusty catalogs and sort through old video game discs, but you often wondered if you'd rather be at home broke and asleep right now.
"Hey Shigs," You call out, breaking his attention away from his phone. "Tits or ass?" You hold up the vintage Playboy magazine up to his direction from across the store.
"You have neither." He replies, leaning forward and slightly squinting in your direction. "I can't see that far. What are you showing me?"
"It's a fucking porn mag, you dick." You call out, throwing a pen in his direction, letting it bounce off the glass counter beside him and landing among the cardboard boxes behind the register.
"Freak, where the fuck did you find that?" He cocks an eyebrow at you, setting his phone down.
"In bossman's desk." You shrug. "Quite a collection he's got in there, actually. Answer the question."
Tomura stops for a moment, leaning against the glass counter behind the register as he deeply thinks about his answer. Given his stoic and apathetic personality, you were half expecting him to tell you to fuck off and eat shit.
"Personality."
"Loser-" You began, getting ready to shoot him the most annoyed eye-roll you could muster.
"-And ass." He cuts you off with a smirk before returning to his phone.
You chuckle, tossing the magazine back in the desk drawer with the others before slamming it shut.
You make your way over to the opposing side of the glass counter where he stood, peering over to see him playing clash of clans on his phone.
"I'm bored. Dying of it, actually." You exacerbated, blowing a breath of air into the pale strands of hair hanging over his forehead "Put your phone away and entertain me for the last hour that we're here."
"Piss off and perish." He mutters, eyes still glued to his screen.
You pout at his coldness. You had spent the day cleaning, reshelving, wiping down any counter you could find, and now at this ungodly hour, you've been left with nothing you could possibly do except wait for the minutes to go by until the end of the shift.
"Wanna make out in the back room?" You prop your elbow on the counter and rest your head in your palm, staring up at him with a flirty smile.
His thumbs pause on his screen, eyes snapping over to meet your own, annoyance flash across them the moment he sees your cheeky grin and fake-innocent eyes staring back at him.
"What?" A faint blush dust over his cheeks as he avert his gaze from your own.
"You heard me." You playfully lean back on your heels, swinging yourself back and forth. "All this alone time, you're not itching to take my clothes off? A little fun, Shigs? Something to help you loosen up?" You inch your face closer to his.
More often than not, you ended up on the schedule with Tomura for the most brutal hours of 6:30pm-1:30am for most nights of the week. Your boss says it's to stay available for the nightcrawlers of the city, but business is always dead by 11:00pm. For those excruciatingly slow last few hours, you cherished spending them terrorizing Tomura for his flustered reactions and the amusement of annoying him.
The pink of his cheeks bloom into a bright red, causing him to hide his face in his forearm, covering it with a cough.
"Just kidding, Shigs." You lean back and playfully shoving his shoulder from across the counter. "I'm just being silly, no need to get your panties in a twist."
"I fucking hate when you do that." He runs a hand through his hair, pushing back the strands that always end up falling back in his face.
"Do what, exactly?" You cock your head to the side.
"You know what. You're worse than Dabi." He huffs. "Start doing your closing work or something if you're bored." He turns his back to you and leans back against the counter, frantically scrolling through twitter- obviously not reading any of the words on screen, but just trying to avoid you for long enough so you lose interest in bothering him.
"I finished those an hour ago." You whine. "Crazy idea, but what if we close early? There's only less than an hour left and these cameras have been out of service for the past 2 months."
He looks back at you, and takes a scan at the state of the store- cleaned, restocked, inventory logged, everything seems to be in order. It wasn't like the store's upkeep was any hard work, anyways. In fact, the owner barely ever came in and you were half sure that he used this old comics and game store for money laundering purposes.
"That might actually be the smartest thing your dumbass has said all shift."
-
The night breeze blew right through your sweater, causing a chill to crawl up your spine.
"Alright, Shiggy, I'll see you when I see you, then?" You squeak out, rubbing your arms for the heat friction.
"Hold on." He mutters, cigarette hanging from his lips as he wiggles the door to make sure it's properly locked. "I'll walk you home."
"I do this walk multiple times a week, Shigs." You smile at the sentiment. "I'll be fine. I live close by."
"I know you'll be fine. I just don't want to go back to the apartment yet. Dabi's throwing a party and I'd rather not deal with a group of drunk idiots right now." He shrugs, taking a drag of the cig before passing it over to you in which you gladly accept from his fingers, letting the intoxicating smoke warm you from the inside.
"Oh, that's right. He invited me when I saw him during the shift change." You exhale, blowing the smoke behind you, starting to lead him towards the direction of your home.
"Shouldn't we head that way, then?" He stops in his tracks.
"Well, I'd only go if you were there to keep me company, but if you're not feeling it then probably not."
"Parties aren't really my thing, but if you're there, then it'll be fine. I can tolerate it." He mutters, kicking a pebble to the side. "I can always just lock myself in my room, I'm sure they'll be too shitfaced to notice, anyways."
"What? I'd notice." You pout.
"I'll lock you in with me, duh." He coughs, hiding a smile while sheepishly rubs the back of his neck.
"Really?"
He nods his head in response.
"Sounds like you like my company a lot more than you give off, Shigs." You smile, redirecting your walk back towards his apartment now.
"Heavy on the tolerate." He meets your eye for a moment before returning them down at his feet.
It had been an especially cold winter night. Hoodies and knitted sweaters were always a staple in Tomura's wardrobe, in any weather, but tonight he sported a dingy old leather jacket over his usual hoodie for the extra warmth. The cold air nipped the apples of his cheeks and tip of his nose into a rosy pink, and if he didn't have his hood over his head, you were sure the tip of his ears would be under the same condition.
You naturally ran hot, but your favorite part of a chilly walk home from work was the blast of warm air hitting your face and defrosting your fingertips the second you walked into your apartment- which fortunately also motivated you to get quick with your pace.
"I think Twice and Toga live this way too." You mumble, starting to recognize the surrounding structures.
"They do. We walk together if we're scheduled together, which is almost never, but a couple times a month, maybe."
"Do you ever think about quitting?" You turn to him and ask.
"Only when the general population is being extra stupid. Other than that, not really. You?"
"Sometimes. I have an existential crisis about what I'm doing with my life every now and then, but I like working with everyone."
"With everyone? You mean just me?" He chuckles, earning him a scoff from you.
"I just tolerate you, actually. I live for those 5 minutes in between shifts where I say hi and bye to my people."
You catch the end of an eye-roll.
"What do you get so existential about?"
"You know, the typical stuff every twenty-something year old goes through. Progressing in life and all that bullshit?" You sigh.
"Get specific, dumbass." He takes a long drag of the cigarette, letting the smoke fog around you. "I'll grant you some of my wisdom."
"Lately, it's a lot of if my kid-self would like my adult-self, if working at the shop is just me trying to hold onto my childhood, dropping out of college, never having my first kiss, miss being taken care of, and probably a million more things." You list off, counting on your fingers.
"Damn. I'd hate to be in your brain." Tomura mutters. "Shit happens and we all die. Better to not stress about it."
"Great wisdom, dipshit." You chuckle, nudging him with your elbow.
"If it makes you feel better, I also dropped out and haven't had a first kiss."
"No education I can tell-"
He flips you off.
"-but no first kiss?" You dramatically gasps "I don't believe that. You're so cute!"
"And you're not?"
Your mouth gaped open at the subtle hit of flirtation from him. The coldness on your neck and cheeks were quickly replaced by an unfamiliar rush of heat.
"Shut up." You mutter, snapping your head forward to hide your blush. "I guess people don't like cute now-a-days."
"Guess not."
After coming up on his apartment building, you two halted to a stop. You two spent most of the walk in silent solitude, passing back and forth the same innocent subtle glances with every puff of the shared cigarette.
"You ready?" He steps out the butt of the cigarette and shoves his hands in the pockets of his jacket.
"Can't wait to see that crusty dusty reddit-incelified gaming set up of yours." You tease.
"Just wait 'til you see the jar." He retaliates, causing you to scowl in disgust and slapping him across the bicep.
For a second, you could almost make out the softest glimpse of a smile on his lips, but you decided to let that be something you keep to yourself, locking it away in your memories.
You follow him into the apartment complex and up the dingy and loud humming of the elevator that replaced the need for conversation. From a few steps outside of the door you could hear the trashy garage band music emitting from the inside- definitely Dabi's kind of party.
You watch Tomura fumble with his keys for a moment before swinging the door open, letting a rush of hot air mixed with the fumes of stale cigarette smoke and beer slap you in the face.
You two cram into the doorway, almost back to back as you kicked off your shoes and shed off unnecessary layers.
You take a step into the living room to see many new and familiar faces huddling in small circles around the apartment, sporting flushed cheeks and drink in hand.
"Dabi's wasted." Tomura leans down and whispers, lips lightly grazing the shell of your ear, sending a shudder up your spine. "Watch out or he might claim your first kiss. He's a stupid affectionate drunk."
Unfortunately for you, your eyes instantly caught onto Dabi's from across the room, causing him to bum rush his way over to you guys, throwing his arms around you two into a hug, crushing your body together against Tomura's.
"I told you." Tomura mouths down to you with an annoyed expression.
"Fuckers, you're late." He slurs into your shoulder. "I shoulda burnt that fucking store down to get you here earlier."
"Aren't you scheduled for the morning?" You cock an eyebrow at his drunken state.
"That's tomorrow-me's problem, sweets." He says with a lopsided grin. He grabs Tomura's head and presses a wet kiss to his temple before slapping one on your forehead. "You kids mingle and go get something go drink."
Once Dabi returns back to the party, you turn to Tomura with a laugh. After wiping off the side of his head with his sleeve, he places a hand on the back of your head, and uses his other to swipe across your forehead, wiping off the remnants of Dabi's drunken kiss.
"Fuckin' gross." He mumbles to himself.
You two spent a little less than an hour making your rounds around the party, a shot here and there when the other coworkers demanded one from you, but with the nod of his head towards the hallway, you knew his social battery had been drained.
"Handling your alcohol?" He asked, pulling you towards his room by the sleeve of your sweater, slightly stumbling over the carpet.
"Of course." You mutter. "You?"
"Couple shots got nothing on me."
The second the door clicked shut behind you, you audibly sighed from the sweet relief of a moment of silence after a full shift of the same work playlist on repeat and the party's music following you around the apartment.
"Finally." Tomura groans, reaching up behind his neck, lightly tugging on the back of his hoodie.
You took a seat on his gaming chair, hugging a knee up to your chest as your eyes scan across the walls of his room, glancing over at his various superhero posters, and bookshelf of collectables until it locked on his pale lower torso that exposed itself from his t-shirt riding up with the hoodie as he yanked it off over his head.
"Uhh." You begin, swiveling your chair around and averting your attention towards his gaming setup. "You stream? You got a webcam."
"Do you care?" You feel a hand grip the head of the gaming chair, swiveling you back around to face him, who is now leaning over you. "Thought you didn't care about all that shit."
"It's different if it's you." You smirk up at him, letting the alcohol boost your suave facade that had originally faltered upon seeing a few inches of his naked torso.
"Relentless flirt." He brings his hand down to flick your forehead before taking a seat on his unmade bed, leaning back against the headboard with his hands behind his head.
You accidentally knock the mouse cursor with your elbow, waking the monitor. Staring back at you in a bright red blocky font was 2:39AM, suddenly sobering you up.
"Oh shit, it's getting pretty late." You check your phone to confirm. "I should get going."
"Uh, isn't your apartment in the opposite direction from work?"
He only had to look you up and down one time to know that you weren't sober enough to make the walk by yourself. He wouldn't even think about letting you leave this apartment at this hour, anyways.
"Yeah? So what?" You cock an eyebrow at him.
"I mean...you think you should stay the night?" He starts, fidgeting with the hem of his shirt. "If you want, I don't care."
"Do you want me to stay the night?" You shoot him a daring smirk.
"Do you want to stay the night?" He retaliates.
"Sounds like you want me to. So fine, I guess, if you're begging for it."
"Fuck off and get eaten by the coyotes." He scowls in irritation, pulling his phone out to divert his attention.
You hop onto the bed next to him, catching his panicked expression the moment he realized how close you two were now. On the same bed. Alone. Along with the new question of where you would be sleeping- something that he had not thought about until now.
"C'mon Shigs! It's no fun when I'm the one that's always doing the chasing, babe. You have to want me as much as I want you, that's what makes it fun." You jokingly sigh.
"Who says I don't?"
Your eyes go wide. You were so used to him deflecting all of your useless attempts to fluster him, so you weren't sure how to handle your short circuited brain the second he finally returns the same energy.
"Uhhh. Okay, I take it back. Don't do that again." You press your lips together in defeat.
"I say four words and you start losing it?" He chuckles. "Think I got you beat at your own game."
"I guess tonight will test that, won't it?"
-
You were slowly eating your words with every second that passed. Your alcohol induced fake confidence had slowly dwindled down to nothing and now here you are sharing a bed with Tomura with your heart beating out of your chest, when you probably should've just offered to take the floor.
You two were lying on your sides facing one another with the covers pulled up to your chin. You were desperately trying to fall asleep, but you could hear his soft inhale and exhales and feel the air brushing past your cheeks as a constant reminder that he's right next to you, sharing the same bed, sharing the same air, all under the same blanket.
You slightly opened your eyes to peer through your lashes to see him wide awake and looking right at you, the back of his hand pressed against his cheek and soft eyes scanning over your face.
You open your eyes to meet his own.
"You're awake?" He whispers, slightly taken aback.
"How can I sleep when your stare is burning into my soul?" You tease. "Go to sleep, Shigs."
You never were able to get this close to Tomura without him flinching back or turning his head away to avert your gaze, but he stayed right here, letting you fully take in his presence. You almost wanted to reach your hand out and touch him, feel the softness of his cheeks, and tuck the stray hairs behind his ears.
"You don't think I'm trying?" He huff "It's fucking freezing in here. Dabi has daddy's money to always have the AC running even in the Winter."
"You should've said something earlier. We've been lying here for the past 30 fucking minutes." You start throwing apart the pillow wall that he put up between you two to prevent any 'funny business.'
"What are you doing?" He furrows his brows.
You say nothing, but instead grabbed the fabric of the t-shirt and pulled him in to close the gap between you two. His eyes widen at the sudden closeness. Your faces were mere inches away from each other, your leg shoved its way in between his, and your arm snaked its way around his waist.
"This okay?"
"A warning would've been nice." He mutters under his breath, stiffly letting his arm hang over your body, landing his hand in the middle of your back.
"I like the essence of surprise." You chuckle, looking up at him. "Better, though?"
He sighs in confirmation. "You're like a fucking furnace." He groans into your hairline.
"And you're like a popsicle."
"This would be nicer if you didn't talk."
"And this would be nicer if you'd relax and stop being so stiff." You pat the area between his shoulder blades, motioning him to let his arms loose. "I've seen you and Spinner cuddle it out on the couch in the backroom all the time, so don't act like you don't know how to do this."
"It's different." He mumble, reluctantly letting his body relax and mold against your own. "It's you."
"You dislike me that much?" You sigh, pressing your cheek against his chest, tapping your fingers against his back in content. "Do it for the purpose of survival, then."
"The opposite."
Your breathing hitches.
"Huh?" You tilt your head up to look at his face.
"Yeah." He presses his lips together, eyes darting around the room.
"You're saying 'the opposite' as in you do like me?"
"Fuck off. Don't make me say it again." His eyes finally lowered to meet yours.
You furrow your eyebrows in confusion. "Say what again? You quite literally did not say anything."
"I think this is the worst fucking time to have this conversation. Go to sleep and talk later."
"No!" You pout. "I'm not tired anymore. Let's talk now. What did you mean by that?"
A moment of silence fell between you two. With your face against his chest, you could hear his heart pounding. You suffered from the same feeling. Your throat goes dry from the anticipation of a potential confession that you'd been silently hoping for since you first met him.
"I thi-" He begins, stopping for a moment to swallow down his nerves. "So fucking awkward." He groans. "I do like you. As if it wasn't obvious, you dumbass."
"Obvious?" You scoff. "I'm obvious. Me. You on the other hand, definitely not."
"You obvious? You flirt to fuck with me."
"I flirt with you because I like you." You bite the inside of your cheeks. "Also to fuck with you, but because I like you."
You two were rendered speechless as you're left to stare at each other with wide eyes, digesting this dual confession.
"So.." He begins, trailing off into nothing.
"So.. is this where we have our first kiss?" You awkwardly laugh, trying to cut through the tension.
"Are you joking?"
"Yes if you're not, but no if you are? I don't know? Not like either of us have done this before." You say through clenched teeth, cringing at yourself as your poor attempt to lighten the mood.
"Okay, then."
"Are you serious?" Your eyes widen at the sudden permission. "That easy? You're not going to tell me to fuck off?"
He disregards your hesitation and props himself on his elbow, looking down at you with a look in his eyes you've never seen before.
"On your back." He instructs.
Your body suddenly goes hot and numb as you slowly turn over onto your back, looking up at him looming over you sporting the same pair of flushed cheeks.
"This is unexpected." You whisper, balling fistfuls of the comforter in your hands. "What the hell is possessing you right now?"
"You, I think." He sheepishly smiles, cautiously bringing a hand down to cup your cheek, his cold hand absorbing your body heat. "It's what you wanted wasn't it? All those times when we're alone at the shop? Asking me to join you in the backroom? You did just say it wasn't just because you were fucking with me."
Just like that, the last 6 months of night shifts spent tormenting Tomura had come to bite you in the ass.
"Okay." You squeak out, reaching up to lay one hand over his, and the other on his shoulder. "I guess you're right. You're not freaking out, though? This is fine for you?"
"Definitely am freaking the fuck out. But I've been waiting for this, so I don't care." He mutters, running his thumb across your lower lip.
"This okay?" He mutters, inching closer to your face.
"Yeah." You whisper a moment before his lips grazes your own.
He finally closes the gap between you, letting the stray strands of his hair drape onto your face, tickling your forehead. For a second, the kiss was stiff with anxiety, but it wasn't even a second until your lips melted into each other's. It was almost suffocating- the sweet gentleness of it all.
Your hand traveled up his shoulder to the nape of his neck where you entangled your fingers in his hair, lightly tugging on the mass. His own hand made it down to your waist, flushing his palm against its curve.
When you broke apart, he collapsed on top of you, hiding his face in the crevice between your neck and shoulder before you two burst out in fits of childish giggles.
"Okay my turn. Get on your back, slut." You laugh, trying to shove him off of you.
"Hell fucking no. You want to kill me? We're done, go to sleep." He buries his face deeper into your neck, releasing a deep sigh of content. "Deal with everything else tomorrow."
"Talk tomorrow." You agree, turning over and entangling your body with his own.
You couldn't help but admire the look of his swollen-kissed lips and sleepy eyes staring back down at you. One last time before you two went off to sleep, you pressed a tender kiss to his lips before melting back into his body.
-
bonus scene:
your hands were lazily attached to one another's during another chilly quiet walk to your apartment the morning after your confessions and kiss.
"you didn't have to walk me home." you mutter, shyly peering over to him.
"i wanted to." he shrugs, tightening his grip on your hand. "the least i could do for keeping me company last night."
you hum in agreement. "no probs. thanks for letting me hang out. we should do it more often."
"the hanging out or..." he tugs down the collar of his knitted sweater to reveal an array of purple and red bruises on his collarbones and shoulder that conspired that early morning of more playful kisses and giggles.
"you see, i don't know how the hell that happened." you press your lips together, suppressing a smile. "must've been a ghost."
"must've been." he smirks, looking on ahead.
once you arrive at your door, he leans his shoulder against the wall as you dig through your bag for your keys.
"you're off tonight, yeah?"
"i am." you glance up at him before pulling out your bundle of keys. "you're kicking it with toga tonight?"
"mmhm. think i can come by after work? we're getting the new volume of terror tales tonight, so i can snatch one for you before it sells out?"
"already planning out the next time you can see me, shigs?" you smile, inserting the key into the door knob.
"i mean, i can let you scour ebay and pay triple for it too, see if i care." he rolls his eyes.
you grab the collar of his sweater and pull him in, connecting your lips for a brief moment.
"it better be in mint fucking condition." you mutter against his lips. "see you tonight."
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rafeandonlyrafe · 1 year ago
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crazy, baby
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words: 1.9k
warnings: 18+ only!, smut, reader is mean and jealous, female receiving oral, p in v sex, unprotected sex (but reader is on birth control), mentions of breeding, one use of daddy, curse words
taglist: @drewstarkeysbae @thelomlisrafecameron @f4ll-for-you @dilvcv @slut4drudy @drewsbabygirll @jjmaybankswifes-blog @rafescokenostril @jjsmarijuana @jjmaybankisbae @seeingstarks @angelofcigs @cece45450
if anyone else spoke to rafe the way you speak to him, they'd probably never be seen again.
but you're not anyone else, you're rafes sweet girlfriend, at least he sees you as sweet, everyone else sees you as equally intimidating as rafe, if not more so because of the power you hold over him.
“rafe, bring me a water.” you call, not looking up from your phone. rafe stands up quickly, heading into the kitchen and bringing you back a water, but not just any water, a freshly cracked open evian bottle.
“here you go baby.” rafe hands you the water, and you don't even acknowledge him as you sip from it.
“do you want to go to a party soon?” rafe asks, and you sigh dramatically at being interrupted, even though all you're doing is scrolling.
“is kelces annoying new girlfriend going to be there? i hate that bitch.” you scowl.
“i told topper that if she's there, we're not there so she was not invited.” rafe says, running his hand through the hair that falls on the side of your face.
“okay, yeah, let's go then.” you shrug, getting up and walking away from rafe to get dressed. you sift through your dresses, trying to decide what to wear before you settle on a tight black dress.
you put it on along with your heels before finding rafe.
“you look so sexy, baby.” rafe groans, gripping your ass when you wrap your arms around his shoulders, pressing your lips together in a kiss. 
“i know, i look hot.” you smirk, rafe nodding in agreement.
“now let me go show my hot girlfriend off to everyone.” rafe says, making you roll your eyes, but a smile still slips through your cold exterior.
you listen to your favorite music in the car while rafe drives you. you complain to him about going so slow, causing him to rev the engine and increase his speed well over the limit as you howl with laughter.
“what do you want to drink, baby?” rafe asks as you enter the party, knowing he's tasked with keeping a cold drink in your hand throughout the whole night, not caring when he has to suddenly leave a conversation to get you a refill.
“mmm, just a white claw please.” you lean closer to rafe, as if you're going to whisper in his ear, but you don't lower your volume down, letting everyone hear your next words, “don't want to get that drunk so i can remember how hard you fuck me tonight.”
rafe cups your cheek, moving your lips to his as he takes them in a hard kiss. “you drive me fucking crazy baby girl.”
you grin, watching as rafe heads away to get your drink. you head further into the party, leaving rafe to find you as you greet a couple of your friends, stopping to talk to topper about the party.
“here you go baby.” rafe finds you amongst the crowd, handing you the white claw, already opened, knowing you don't like to use your nails on the pop tabs.
“rafe, don't you think this music is pretty shit?” you question to rafe, but topper understands it's directed to him and stands up to change the song, knowing how you get when you're annoyed and not wanting to face your wrath.
you nod in approval when the music is changed from rap to more hip hop, knowing it's better for dancing and gloating to rafe how immediately the switch has more people heading to the makeshift dance floor on toppers patio.
“you were right, baby, you're always right.” rafe hums in agreement, watching you finish off your white claw.
“im gonna go dance with my girls.” you tell rafe, giving him a kiss before heading off. rafe knows he doesn't have to give you permission or even worry about you, you truly don't have eyes for anyone else, all other guys piss you off except for rafe.
rafe smiles as he watches you leave, completely infatuated with you, only half listening to whatever topper is talking about.
you find the few girls that don't annoy you and hug them quickly before joining in their dancing, shoving one of their boyfriends away when he tries to dance up on his girlfriend. you have told her to break up with him so many times and wish she would finally just listen.
“do you know the girl rafe is talking to?” one of your friends ask, but you don't even look to see who uttered the words as your head snaps to look at rafe, still in the same spot you left him, but there's a new girl in your place, some bottle blonde that has your blood boiling. she's talking her head off while rafe stands there disinterested, holding another white claw for you when you're done dancing.
“what the fuck?” you growl, stomping through the crowd to rafe. you smack the drink out of his hand, letting it spill all over the floor.
“baby, what's wrong?” rafe questions, but you've already turned your attention to the girl.
“back off my boyfriend you whore.” you shout at her, rafe wrapping his arms around your waist to keep you from physically fighting her. “he would never go for an ugly slut like you anyways!” 
the girls eyes widen, rushing away from you and rafe as you turn to him in anger. “i walk away for a couple minutes and you start flirting with some other girl?” you shout.
“baby, she was just talking to me and i wasn't even listening. calm down.”
“rafe cameron don't you dare tell me to calm down!” you yell, but rafe simply ignores your outburst, leaning down to pick you up, throwing you over his shoulder. you shout and beat your fists against his back, but rafe keeps walking, heading upstairs as you groan.
“im mad at you, rafe.” you frown when he sets you down in one of the guest bedrooms.
“and im gonna make it up to you, baby. gonna fuck you, yeah?” rafe says, tugging the top of your dress down, revealing your tits to him.
“since you wanna be a brat, im gonna fuck all the attitude out of you.” rafe shrugs, hands gripping your chest, playing with your nipples.
“you think you can just fuck me to make up for almost cheating?” you complain, but reach to grip rafes cock.
“i didn't almost cheat, you know that. i would never. you're my girl, my perfect girl. i only want you.” rafe leans forward, kissing you before you can argue back. “i love you sweetheart.”
you moan against rafes lips, feeling him harden under your fingertips. “i love you too.” you pull at rafes shirt, and he disconnects your lips to take it off. “im sorry for being jealous.”
“it's okay. clearly i haven't been taking care of you enough for you to get all pent up.” rafe says, tugging at the waist of your dress, pulling it up to reveal your small panties.
“turn around.” rafe commands, and for once you listen to him, bending over the bed and placing your hands on the comforter to stabilize yourself.
“why would i ever want another girl after having your pretty pussy?” rafe sinks to his knees behind you, rubbing his hands over your bum, giving it a light smack before tugging your underwear down your legs.
“eat me.” you say, and rafe moves quickly to shove his head between your legs, tongue and mouth working quickly over your pussy.
“fuck, right there.” you groan when rafe flicks over your clit. you angle your hips to give him even better access, his hands gripping your shaking thighs to keep you stable.
“m-more.” you whine, grinding your cunt down onto his face. rafe drags his tongue back through your folds until he reaches your hole, his tongue pushing in as he thrusts it in and out.
you moan loudly, not caring if anyone passing by can hear you. it's not the first time you've hooked up at a party, or even a party at toppers house. everyone knows how crazy you two are for each other.
“give me your cock, rafe cameron.” you tell him, and rafe presses a kiss to your clit before standing up. you lean forwards, shaking your bum by swaying your hips side to side, enticing rafe as you hear him undoing his pants and dropping them to the ground.
you let out a whine when you feel his cock press against your entrance. he teases you there for a moment, making you wait, and just when you are about to shout for him to hurry it up, rafes hips push forward and he sinks his cock into you in one smooth motion.
“fuck!” rafe shouts, feeling your cunt squeezing him. he immediately starts to move, his cock hammering in and out of you as rafes large hands grip your hips. he pulls you back into him, but you don't even need the encouragement, rocking your body back and forth, moving in time with him.
the harsh slapping sound of your skin hitting each other each time echos around the room.
“fuck me faster, rafe.” you tell your boyfriend, who starts to buck his hips into yours, not fully pulling out before he pushes back in, wanting to stay buried deep inside of you as much as possible.
“like that.” you moan appreciateivly.
“my pretty girlfriend, moaning like a slut for me.” rafe smiles down at you, “so jealous just from seeing a girl stand near me, you're all mine. you love me so much.”
“i do love you rafe.” you say, his hands gripping your hips tighter at the declaration.
“and i love you more. fucking crazy about you, crazy about this pussy.”
“yeah?” you smirk. “gonna fill this pussy up?”
“of course baby, gonna put a baby in you, gonna make sure you can't leave me even when you threaten to.” rafe says, knowing two things: that you are on birth control and not actually able to get pregnant, and despite you often getting mad and saying you're going to leave him, that you are never going to.
“yes, daddy, fuck a baby into me.” you moan, reaching a hand down to rub at your clit, already pulsing from rafes talented mouth.
“i hope everyone hears you moaning for me. im yours, baby, im yours.” rafe moans, throwing his head back as he can't hold back any longer, his cum spurting into you, causing your orgasm to overtake your body as well.
you collapse forward into the bed, unable to keep yourself up as rafe moves with you, keeping himself buried in your pussy.
“are you calm now?” rafe asks, making sure to carefully pull out of you, watching as his cum drips onto the comforter.
“i am.” you hum, eyes fluttering closed with your cheek pressed against the mattress.
“want to go home and fuck some more or want to go back to the party?” rafe asks, getting himself redressed, handing you your underwear when you finally sit up.
“mmm, party for like half an hour so everyone can see how fucked out we both look than home for more.” you say, putting your panties back on and readjusting your dress, leaving the bed a mess for topper or more likely his family maid to take care of.
“you're crazy, baby.” rafe laughs, wrapping his arm around your shoulders.
“and don't you forget it.”
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suguru-getos · 1 year ago
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୨・┈﹕✦﹕ Kinktober Day 24﹕✦﹕┈・୧
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-> Event Masterlist
Geto Suguru x F!Reader -> Size Kink
Summary: After returning from your trip, you found out your boyfriend is not okay. Maybe a vacation (To Venice) ;) would help. (Mentions of Deppressed!Suguru, angst, breakdowns, toothrotting fluff and comfort, Satoru being a wonderful best friend, Suguru healing) ❤️‍🩹 Basically hurt-comfort with size!kink 😭
Warnings: Angst, breakdowns, Suguru’s deranged and suc!dal and has murderUrges, Reader (us) comfort him and pull him out from it. Mentions of reader’s breakdowns, cus I mean— 🤷🏻‍♀️ Look at him!!?? Nipple-play, breeding, softsex, sensual, FLUFFY AND NICE AND SUGURU’s so Spoiling towards us it’s just 🙈
A/N: Guys I had sm fun 🥹😵‍💫🩵 writing this I swear!! Hurt-comfort is like my favorite thing in the whole wide world <33 I love to characterize Suguru & to play around with his character. *Screeches and screams* 🍨🍦 I made him yummy thank me later xx Also can we look at the images of him above 🥵 size kink BRRRR
"If you really think, you can do everything, take everything in, save people, and somehow save yourself along with the deceitful thinking that you will protect me. Then you're wrong!" Tears welled up in your eyes, the pain clearly imminent in Suguru's eyes. He looked dead inside, and no mourning was soothing your ache for your older Suguru. You just, missed him beyond beliefs… even when he was right beside you. You hoped he would response to your cry of pain, your bleeding words, but he didn't have it in him anymore. Suguru had almost, given up on himself.
Your hands found themselves clasping onto his collar, pulling him closer to you. "Suguru, look at me, I am telling you something. Can't you fucking see how much it hurts!" You screamed, losing your calm, your temper. It felt ironical to complain to him about how much it's hurting you. You can see he's got it worse; the nights full of terrors and the days full of decaying cursed spirits. You were an empath for your lover, and it was clear staying near him was subjecting you to everything he felt. He doesn't want to see you this way, desperate and hurting…
"I'm sorry, Angel." Suguru sighed, wrecked with the way you burst into tears and hugged him. Voice choking onto sobs as you earnestly tried clutching onto him for dear life. "Sugu, come back to me please come back…" You cried, wailed and eventually dropped onto your knees. The incomprehensible feeling, the heaviness of the things Suguru was going through was making you breathless.
Suguru's heart was only breaking further apart, watching you slowly scrape away in front of him. "I want to kill myself." He finally spoke up, "No, truth is, I want to kill everyone."
This was the first time Suguru was opening up, and no matter how brutal it sounded, his eyes were still kind. Maybe because it was you, in front of him. "You are a sorcerer, too, I shouldn't say this to you, but I hate those monkeys." He radiates pessimism and negativity through him. Yet, you smile a little.
"Come with me, go away with me." You held his hands, squeezing them tightly as if you were grateful they're not cold. You truly were. They were warm, they were still your Suguru's hands.
"Please, Suguru, let's go away for some time." You urged, and he knelt with you, hugging you tightly, not caring about the whimper that escapes you because of his firm grip.
"Running away, won't solve anything." He echoed, and you felt your stomach sink. Soft sniffles echoing in the room as you shook your head like a tantrum-y child.  "No, we will solve everything. You and I, we can solve everything. No matter what it is." You cupped his face, becoming stronger for him. "It's okay to feel like this Suguru, it's okay. I'm here." You nudge, watching his eyes showing signs of at least, some life in them. "Can you, not give up?" You meant on himself, you meant on everything.
To make sure, he understands… you hummed again, "makes me feel like, I'm being abandoned."
Suguru blinked at that, letting your words settle deep within. "Makes me feel like, I'm not even worth fighting for." You looked down, not having the guts to say this to him while making eye-contact. "Please, let's elope somewhere Sugu." You crooned, babying him almost. "I will follow you to the ends of the earth anyway, even if your path is changed." You hum, and with the way your pupils fixated on your hands intertwined, Suguru knows you mean it.
"Okay, maybe… I do need a little get away." Suguru smiled tenderly, partial charm returning to his eyes.
Oh it felt like rain in famine, "Good, thank you, I love you."
"I love you too, my Angel."
---
The next thing was you booking tickets to go to Europe. You urged Satoru and Yaga to not assign any more missions for Suguru. It was hard, you and Suguru were both powerful special grade sorcerers; but hey- you both had Satoru to rely on. "I told you the moment he lost weight, he wasn't doing okay." Satoru scoffed, rolling his eyes, tapping at his feet impatiently in the café you decided to meet him in. "What the fuck is up with being the one to hide things?" Satoru was pissed, why would his best friend not communicate? "Makes him feel less of a man?" You chuckle at that, you knew Satoru loved him almost as much as you did. "I've persuaded him to go on a trip with me." "You did?" Satoru was… amazed. These days, Suguru wasn't even joining in for any normal outings. Wasn't going out of his house for weeks, wasn't even meeting you. Things worsened when you left to Korea for a mission longer than 3 weeks. You had to stay there for some Jujutsu School Collaboration initiative. That's when Suguru was off his leash, truly at his worst. Taking missions more than he should, succumbing to the darkness of his mind and the curses.
"Just, want you to handle things while we're gone." You sipped onto the iced frappe you've ordered. Meanwhile Satoru ate a mochi, seemingly absent-minded and bored. "You don't have to worry about that, you know I'd do that in a heartbeat for him." He bratted, raising a brow at you. "And you…"
You smiled at that, nodding gently. It felt good to have the 'Strongest' so whipped for your boyfriend, and platonically you, as well.
The higher-ups posed a threat, as always. 'Why is Suguru Geto not on missions?' ; 'Did he get off the job of a Sorcerer?' especially the cunt-faced Principal of Kyoto. You and Satoru personally paid him a disrespectful visit at his school. Nothing he can complain against, wouldn't sit well to anger two special grades, will it? Despite showing that the Sorcerer world is only filled with people who are willing to take on the role- example: Nanami switching from corporate jobs to a sorcerer job… it was still, at the end, a disgusting, foul powerplay hidden beneath shackles of rules. If you are a special grade sorcerer, they'd do anything to hold on to you. Even blackmails are not far off the list. Emotionally draining…
---
"I have booked us a flight to Venice, baby." You sat cross legged on the swing chair Suguru's house has, fondling with your iPad and searching for hotel venues. "Venice huh." Suguru was still numbed, but at least, not he couldn't avoid you because practically you lived with him now. "Yeah, we can go to Switzerland, and also wherever you want. I hear Germany this time of the year is beautiful." You croaked excitedly, swaying your legs as he walked towards you, sitting on the chair in front of you. "Satoru told me you and I are on a vacation for months." He came directly on the point. "The trip isn't that long, is it?" He manspreaded, raising a brow.
You gulped, smiling softly, the last thing you need is him feeling 'weak'. You had to approach this carefully. "Suguru, I think you and I have done enough missions for a while. I want us to spend some time together, to ourselves." You added some degree of truth, "Also, I don't want you to keep eating curses and letting them eat you from the inside and I don't want to lose the person I love the most in my fucking life." With the way you affirmatively snapped, there was no way, Suguru would battle against it. A soft nod was all you got as a response.
"Alright, I will handle the packing. Don't want you screeching like a wild animal when you discover you forgot your charger." He leaned in, giving you a chaste peck & you giggled. "Of course."
---
The packing, the preparations, the dressing up and going to the Airport, the flight where you slept leaned against his shoulder. All went by in a tender haze of beautiful memories. Inflicted and infected by his sadness, still. Though you wouldn't mind. You're ready to accept him rotten if needed.
When you two reached Venice, the Victorian style hotel with the boats and the beautiful lakes was in fact, refreshing for him; and you. You knew it because Suguru had stopped going to your shared balcony of the house, now here he was, standing there, observing the people. The couples giggling and kissing each other, the boat rowers singing in their native Italian language, the streets with so much hustle and bustle… yet calming. You hugged him from behind, breathing in his scent. "Like it?" "Love it, my beautiful baby." He crooned back, turning towards you and pulling you closer to him by your hips. "I love you." He chanted, almost in a way that he used to when he first asked you out. These past few months were hard and rough, but if you were able to have him back, even infinitely slowly… you'd dedicate it to eradicating all his sadness.
"If you want, I can dress very Lana Del Rey today and we could make steamy love." You giggled, leaning in and kissing him softly. Suguru and you… yeah, haven't made love in a while. You'd never push him when he isn't feeling it, and naturally, someone who's suffering so much would have it at the last thing on his mind.
"You're right, how disappointing of me… I don't remember the last time I treated you, I worshipped you." He thought out loud, and you pouted. "It's okay Suguru, don't think about it like that. Think about how you're gonna make it up to me." You stuck your tongue out, giggling.
It's the way he looks at you, like he's starving and you're delectable. It's the way his eyes are loud enough with their projection of love that it quiets the world down for you. It's the way Suguru Geto breathes, that makes you love him so much you'd break.
Right now, he's doing the same thing… being himself. Hands wandering to your sides and helping you wrap your legs around his waist as he walked towards the shared bedroom of the hotel. Leaning in and kissing you passionately, shoving his tongue just to show how much he's been deeply yearning. Admiration coated in every action. "So lucked out that I have you." He smiled to himself, kissing your forehead deeply once you were nestled into the succumbing softness of the mattress.
"Same," you grin back, watching him undress you with his eyes first, and then his hands followed. You mimicked the same movements.
"I can't handle the fucking hotness!" You whined, once he was left in his pants, upper body naked for you to devour. Suguru chuckled, heat rushing through his cheeks and core as he cupped your face, kissing you once again.
The thing about you and him is, Suguru is big. He's built like a bulky man. Stretched to 6'3'', broad shoulders that'd hold two of you, hands big enough you miss almost an inch if you were to compare his with yours. Yeah, Suguru was big and you were tiny. Something that only aided to you being subbier and smaller to him. Letting him manhandle and take all the control that he wants to.
"Who do you belong to, darling?" He cooed, watching you instantly answer. "You, forever and always."
It warms his heart when he hears that, spreading your damp pussy lips with his fingers and thrusting a finger into you. It's been… long. He knows it with the way you're clamping for dear life, just on his digit. "Sh-i-t," You croak out, while Suguru hushed you with a soft kiss, slowly moving his finger in and out of your pussy. Once he felt you had accepted his finger's girth, he inserted another one. "AH god-" You whined, mewling at the delicious stretch of his thick and long fingers being coated with your essence. "You want to make sweet love and you're so worked up with the fingers alone." He chuckled to himself, stretching you out so good, curling them against the familiar sensitive spot.
Your back arched, the way your pussy clamped as if she was a slave to his hands and cock.
"Oh she's close." He cooed, "Go on, cum for me then I can ruin you with me." He kissed your pelvis, holding it down as your orgasm raked through you, approaching fiercely and shuddering your body against him as waves of pleasure took over you. "Good girl. Good little girl." Suguru praised, riding it out for you. Once the orgasm's high settled, Suguru took out his fingers and suckled onto them, eyes never leaving yours.
"Want you, so bad!" You gasped out, pulling him closer to you by wrapping your legs around him, feeling the imprint of his cock into you. "Alright alright, impatient little girl." He smirks, pushing the tip of his pre-leaking cock into you in one swift stroke. Mean, Suguru Geto is mean sometimes… especially when he wants you to be scream at the stretch only he can give you. No one else, he wants your pussy to know only how he feels. Damn he's big, and when he pushes himself balls deep, your pussy is strained beyond its limit. "Shit- s- so big Sugu." You whimper out, tearing up at the ache.
"Ssh, it's okay darling. I'm still. Adjust to me, go on." Suguru patiently waits, kissing your face all over, leaning in and kissing your breasts, suckling onto your nipples while you clamped and waited for the pain to settle in.
"Move, please…" You glance at him now, doe-eyed and insatiable.
"Of course, took you some time to adjust to me huh? Tiny little baby." He smiles, thrusting into you without relent. Your womb stops him from going in any further, your insides torn apart deliciously at the feeling of being ploughed by him. "Oh- G- oh God," words fail you, the air choked out of your lungs with how good it hurts, with how pleasureful it feels.
Suguru's hand laced around your pelvis, pressing on it gently. "Got you," He smirks cockily, holding your hand and keeping it on your pelvis, enveloped by his own as he pressed.
A shrill scream filled the room, "Oh you can sense it, can't you sweetheart? Sense how deep I reach?" You moan at the pressure, pushing you closer and closer to the edge as you hopelessly nodded. Gasping and choking on air. "God yes, Sugu- AH please- oh my- g'nna," You whimpered, while Suguru was at a rhythmic pace now. Sometimes pulling all the way out and pushing back all the way in. He loved seeing you walk the rope between pleasure and pain.
"Good girl, with the way you're holding onto me, I can sense you're close." Suguru hummed, grounding you with his kisses, his spoiled little praises.
"Go on, show me how much you missed me."
"Just like (thrust) I (thrust) missed (thrust) this (thrust) pussy-" Suguru toppled off the edge right with you, painting your insides white with his warmth. "Oh god- fuck-"
You shudder, spasming around his cock and milking him further.
"That's it, I got you. I got you." Suguru reminded, leaning in and kissing you softly, tenderly, as if you'd break if he were to touch you wrong.
"I missed you, I missed this." He mused to himself, blushing a little at the sight of you fucked out and half-lidded. You nodded, still taking ragged breaths. "I love you"
"I love you too, Angel."
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luveline · 1 year ago
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Omg jade hii <3 I know it's not shy friday yet but can I request maybe eddie with a shy best friend who's secretly in love with him? 👉👈 up to you wether he notices or is oblivious. I love your fics sm thank u any way❤️
omg hii thank u for ur request, I guess it is shy friday now!! i hope u enjoy! fem!reader, 1k
Eddie grabs your hand as soon as he gets close enough, his delight to see you completely unshielded. "Holy shit!" he says, forgetting your hand to throw his arms over your shoulders. "I missed you so fucking much, never ever go on vacation again." 
"Eddie," you murmur reproachfully, though your arms have a mind of their own, wrapping around his back. 
"You're not allowed to leave me. I hate everybody who isn't you the longer you're gone, it makes me a bad person." 
Eddie steps back but keeps your shoulders in his hands. His eyes are soft and brown, but his excitement to see you has his pupils like pinpricks. His cheeks are quickly chapped in the cold wind blowing in through the doorway. 
"I bet it was warmer there, we're knee deep in winter now," he says. "You look like you had a good time." 
"It was good," you agree, sliding the bag of presents from your elbow to your wrist, assuming he'll want to see them most. 
He begged for gifts, in person before you went and down the phone while you were gone, landline calls he insisted on. I worry about you, I wanna make sure you're okay when I’m not there.
You got him everything you could afford, a magnet, a bottle opener, a key chain, a teddy bear with a flag around his neck. Basically a bag load of candy on top. 
"I really missed you, sweetheart," he says. "Not to be sincere or anything, but I fucking love you. Next time you go away I'm gonna have to come with you." 
You laugh nervously. "I love you too," you say, averting your gaze to his collar, black double stitching against his neck. 
"Are you hungry?" he asks. 
"No," you lie. You hate being an imposition on him, even knowing that Eddie will tell anyone willing to listen that you're his best friend. 
"Seriously? You were on a plane for hours, and you came straight to see me, let me buy you pizza or something, yeah?" 
You lick your lips and nod. Eddie lifts your face to his, and it genuinely feels like a heart attack, that sudden realisation he could kiss you if he wanted to, the proximity of his face to yours. Instantly, you're wondering if your breath is okay, if you have eye crusties, if you smell good. 
"Are you okay?" he asks, concerned.
"I'm alright, I'm just tired," you say. 
"You don't look tired, you look cagey. Sorry, I forget that you get all shy again when we don't see each other." He talks brazenly but not without sympathy, patting your shoulder. "Come on, let's get something to eat."
"Can we order something? I'm sick of being in motion."
Eddie throws his car keys like a longshot into the bowl on the sideboard by his front door. "Yes. Absolutely. I'm sick of moving too, and this is the first time I've stood up today." 
"Gross."
"I brushed my teeth before you came over," he says, bearing them garishly as proof. He talks through gritted teeth, "Pearly white, no?" 
"Looking good." 
He beams. Eddie wraps a hand around your wrist like the touch means nothing and tugs you along to the living room. He pushes you down into the seat you always take, tosses your usual blanket at you, and whizzes off to the kitchen for coke and popcorn. He has the sweet stuff in a bucket that he eats a handful at a time, the lid sealed. 
"New one?" you ask. 
"Waiting for my best girl to get home," he says easily, collapsing down into the seat next to you, dropping the remote on your chest. "Shit, I missed this." 
"You didn't watch TV while I was gone?" you ask, confused. 
"I watched TV, it just wasn't good without you in my ear judging people." 
"I don't judge people… much." 
"Everybody judges people. I love when you judge people 'cos you say what I'm thinking." Eddie drops his head into your shoulder, his curls brushing your cheek. "I missed you so much." 
"You said that," you say quietly, a little breathless. 
Eddie looks up at you, something playful about him as he says, "I know. It's fucking true as all hell, too. What do you want from Marino's? I'll get you two if you promise not to go away again." 
"What am I gonna do with two pizzas?" you ask, the warmth of him seeping down into your shirt. 
Eddie digs a nail into the popcorn lid, face turned to you but gaze on the bucket. "Uh, eat them. Eat one tonight, take one with you tomorrow for breakfast." 
"I don't want two pizzas, just one is good. I'm gonna eat all your popcorn anyway, I won't have room." 
"Oh, yeah?" he asks, eyes flying to your face. "You think so, huh?" 
Your heart in your mouth, a shudder coursing down your chest, you have a moment where you think for sure he knows, he's found out, and he doesn't care —he looks like he wants you to confess. 
What a fantastically dangerous idea. You avert your gaze and thrust your bag of gifts and candy into his arms. "You'll be too full for popcorn after those." 
You can feel his gaze on your cheek for a little while longer, but eventually he moves from your shoulders, laughing quietly as he digs through his new things. 
"You're so awesome," he says, pulling out the keychain you got him. It's an electric guitar with an enamel body the same colours as the flag. "I'm putting this on my keys right now." 
Eddie kisses your cheek. "Thank you," he adds.
He stands and rounds the couch to go get his keys. You feel your cheek with a trembling hand. Eddie kisses you, he hugs you, he has a thousand affections and all of them set you aflame. Sighing, you let your cheek drop into your hand. It's hopeless. 
He watches from the doorway as you sigh. His smile can't be described any other way —he's infatuated. The sooner you realise, the better, but for now he's really enjoying the run up. 
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redcherrykook · 5 months ago
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── ˙✧°📷 TORN PICTURES AND FROZEN LENSES 5
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────୨ৎ────
College Photography Teacher!Jungkook x Student!Reader
27 year old, stupidly handsome asshole teacher Mr. Jeon has absolutely no human decency, he believes your victim complex is what keeps you from ever achieving anything, letting people use you as a bridge. When something unexpected happens, the ice starts to melt as a foreign word called "empathy" enters his egocentric lense. Maybe he will finally manage to teach you a lesson now, since you keep failing his class.
(Mini series)- Episode five!
Song recommendation: white Mustang- Lana del rey
Content: Cold, mean, distant, unprofessional Jungkook, hurt, stubborn reader, enemies to lovers, lowkey dramatic, accident happens, mutually beneficial relationship (emotionally), Jk learns a lot from her, Jk is mean but has a soft spot for reader (eventually), 6 year age gap, Reader is from a struggling background, Jk kind of rescues her, happy ending, angst at first, fluff, smut, comedy/crack, bickering, college setting, brief hospital setting
Warnings: swearing, name-calling,mentions of an accident involving a biker, mentions of hospital, mentions of injuries, really mean Jungkook, i promise he gets sweet, mentions of trauma and abuse (non detailed), mental health struggles (semi detailed), arguments
Sexual content: (light) praise kink, (light) size kink (lmao next episode bout to go crazy with that one), oral; fem. receiving, chest play, making out
Taglist: @bts-iris @kaeysv @khadeeeeej @rockstryoon
────୨ৎ────
Another day, another night spent on the couch of Jungkook, watching some sort of show with him, munching on dinner he cooked.
He got used to cooking for two.
Its been a week,
A week that turned into a week and a half.
Still no calls, no places, no friends to crash at.
Not even Taehyung, his fraternity house is much worse than just staying with Jungkook.
Not like it bothered you, Jungkook is comfortable, he has a cozy apartment with enough space for two people.
Growing borderline nice from day to day.
His little gestures like buying two of the icetea he drinks, like changing the sheets if you had class the days he hadn't, cooking jjajangmyeon without onions because you hate them.
It was easy to get used to his routine, to bicker with him daily, to sit next to him when he works on his lesson preperation, while you study for your classes.
Sleeping in his shirt, doing your laundry in his bathroom, and accidentally stumbling across his calvin klein's.
It felt intimate at times, like living together was more than just that.
Tonight is different.
Tonight would be your very first party.
After a whole week of persuasion, Taehyung talking your ear off about how fun it was, how many people you could meet, how you could dance your heart away.
You decided, fuck it. One party.
"To be clear, I'm NOT drinking and i swear if you touch me, Taehyung, I will actually strangle you" loud and clear, your boundaries set while you're on call with him. Taehyung called you at 10pm as you were peacefully watching "Running man" with Jungkook, at first you shut off the call.
Until another followed by another call coming through.
"Just come on! once! One single time" he begged, Jungkook's jaw clenching at the voice from the other end of the phone.
He simply can not stand Taehyung, the way he devours you with his eyes, the way he talked you into doing things you don´t normally want to do,
like parties.
In desperate need of social contacts and having some serious fun, a party doesn't sound too bad anymore, Tae would keep his hands off, now that you told him to.
"You're seriously going?" Jungkook asks once you end the call, his eyes stern and burning through you, judging you almost.
"Yeah. You can enjoy a night to yourself again, I won't get back late, I promise" you smile at him, already thinking of what to wear from your very limited selection of clothes.
He scoffs, pressing his lips together.
"What? Got something against it?" your head tilts, a playful smirk on your lips.
His eyes move away from yours and back to the flashy TV screen.
"Just not looking forward to having to pick you up wasted, possibly having to push off some jerk to even get to you" his tongue presses the inside of his cheek, not making eye contact with you. A strong hand is rubbing his thighs that are spread on his couch, while the other one moves through his hair, lifting his arm enough to see his well defined triceps.
A part of you hopes that he was jealous, that he hated the thought of you making out with some college jerk, just like you hated the thought of making out with anyone that wasn't him.
There was nothing left to confront, nothing to deny.
You have a crush on Jungkook, on your photography teacher that you live with.
Maybe it was the intimacy of living with him, but the racing heartbeat in your chest, the pertruding smile on your face whenever he smiled too, even if slight, even if to make fun of you,
The throbbing between your thighs when he speaks in his sultry, low voice. The way his hair is messy most of the time, how his muscles flex when he's working, his groans of frustration, making you wonder just how he could sound if he groaned more. Your thoughts when he drives with his skillful fingers, the way he licks his lip piercing when he's focused. Having to surpress the thoughts of what happened, almost happened, when you were both drunken by the burning alcohol.
All of it is impossible to ignore, to talk yourself into believing it´s nothing.
Every inch of him, of his habits, it made you flaunt for him. Wishing that instead of his shirt, it was him, sleeping next to you peacefully.
Looking at him ever so often, hoping to catch him looking back.
Even taking longer in the shower when your wandering thoughts get accompanied by your wandering hands.
It is wrong, it is so wrong because he's your teacher, because the goodness behind his hard exterior helped you through your own mess in life.
And yet, you find yourself going out to party away the thought of him, only to return back to him the same night.
"Don't worry kook, I'm not drinking. You won't have to pick me up, just enjoy your night alone" you make your way into the guest bedroom to change.
"Am not worried, you're old enough" he grumbles as you walk away.
Of course, he wasn't worried.
Until he's stuck in his living room, pacing around.
He glances at the clock, 2:15 am, still no text, still no doorbell.
Originally, Jungkook wasn't going to do anything special, just watch Tv and cook something nice for a midnight snack.
You had left the house at half past ten, in a pair of black low waisted cargos and a tight fitting crop tee. Black as well, matching your shoes too.
Simple, comfortable, not too revealing.
Not that he would have cared if someone saw you in a revealing outfit,
That's what he likes to believe. In reality, he would have probably come with you if you did, glaring at every guy who dared to look.
The thought of you not answering his text because of being drunk somewhere or being in bed with a guy you had just met made him sick.
"I'm not letting you walk back at this hour. Call me when you need me to pick you up. And don't start arguing over this"
Sent at 11:39, over two hours ago.
Left on delivered.
He sits back down, sighing and deciding to call over his best friend, turn this into a boys night.
You are out partying, probably having fun with other people, why shouldn´t he?
Dialing the familiar number, it rings briefly before a voice deep answers the phone.
"JK! what's up bro?" Mingyu greets
"I'm good. My student left so i thought i'd ask you to come over? Haven't hung out in a while" Jungkook humms while checking the pantry for any snacks.
"Your little girlfriend left? Miss her so much you gotta make your best friend keep you company?" Mingyu laughs loudly from the other side of the phone.
Naturally, being Jungkook's best friend, he knew about the night that you almost kissed. Ever since then, he's been teasing him about it. Pissing him off by insisting on calling you his "little girlfriend".
"Fuck off gyu, could´ve just said no asshole" he scoffs, ready to hang up the phone.
"Don't get so butthurt Jk, she's getting you soft already. I'll be there in 20. Wanna go to a bar?"
He ignores the other comment,
"Nah, I'll go pick her up later. Stop by to get some snacks" he replies casually.
"Alright. Where did she go by the way?" Mingyu just noticed that Jungkook hasn't mentioned why you weren't at his apartment tonight.
His scoff was enough response that could be heard on the other end of the call,
"A fucking frat party"
Mingyu chuckles, thinking up a cheeky reply, but he was too slow.
Jungkook hangs up the phone, waiting patiently for a ring on his doorbell, not sure if he was still waiting for you or Mingyu.
-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈
"You'e insane Tae" you shout through the blaring music, barely able to hear the sound of your own words against people screaming and a bass stronger than any drug that was being done around you.
There were many of those, openly at that.
"Is that good?" He shouts back, grinning.
The party is as expected of a frat house party, about sixty college students running around the large apartment, a pool, many couches filled with girls and all of that jock stuff.
Bottles flying around in the kitchen which you found yourself standing in right now, all types of alcohol and cocktail mixes in bowls, what ever is them no one really knows.
Clothes seem basically optional here, most guys are running around shirtless, most girls running to the pool that´s a few feet from the huge glass sliding door around the corner, wearing either underwear or nothing at all.
Taehyung thankfully being clothed.
He did, as usual, have a stupid thought. Thinking it was a great idea trying to outdrink his friend that you had just met,
And already hate.
Jackson, a tall football player who's shoulders are as huge as his ego. He, like the rest of the guys, is shirtless, covered in hickies that wrap all the way around his neck.
Apart from the fact that he's made out with four different girls that all called him some variation of the word 'baby',
he has also been eye fucking you since you first saw him
To which Taehyung is oblivious to, or has been ignoring.
Still, he promised you not to leave your side throughout the entire night, as well as making sure you don't drink, like you had said you wouldn't.
"What? Think I can't win?" He says again when noticing you silently judging him.
You roll your eyes, hands throwing upward to express just how ridiculous he's being "Not about winning, it's a stupid idea. I'm not gonna pick your ass up the floor"
Taehyung laughs in return, throwing back his first shot, to which Jackson follows
"You won't have to"
Jackson smirks, "nine more to go Tae"
"Easy buddy, gonna kick your ass" his voice sounding cocky, already on his way to pour the next shot of vodka.
"Sure you don't want a shot miss goody two shoes?" Jacksons eyes wander to your cleavage,
Eyes are up here, you think.
"Sounding like a broken record at this point. No drinks" you scoff at him, grossed out by his shameless behavior.
In order to distract yourself from the situation, your eyes wander around the apartment, looking for anything interesting.
People making out left and right, no matter if "Va Va Voom" or "Fe!n" played, no one cared who was looking, what lyric was blaring.
It made you cringe inside when you spotted a guy grinding against a girl you knew from Piano lessons, right next to two guys taking molly.
Never going to a frat party again, you think.
Upon first arrival, it was really fun. Tae was dancing his heart out with you, making small talk with some people here and there. You could engage with them as well. Soon enough, he started drinking, making himself tipsy within a couple shots and a beer.
By then you realized you would end up having to look after him at the end of the night, not the other way around.
While you came to make friends, it was practically impossible. Sure, amaybe small talk. Sadly, it always led to the same outcome:
Every girl coming up tried to get it in with Tae and glared at you for being with him or was too drunk.
Meanwhile every guy either tried to get you to drink, tried to touch you, to which Taehyung did push them off immediately, or was also well, way too drunk.
So much for making friends, i guess.
Noticing you have been zoning out for a while, your eyes glance back to the guys in front of you, leaning against the counter.
Wondering how many shots it has been since you last looked.
Both set the small, empty shot glasses on top of the surface.
"Six. Four left to go Tae" Jackson looks relaxed, flushed out a bit but definitely stable, definitely not tipsy yet.
Taehyung on the other hand was slurring his words, a drunkenly hazed smile spread flat across his flushed pink face.
" 'course man. Bring it on"
Shaking your head, you ponder if it was even worth staying still.
Time is truly a weird thing because just when the thought was finished, the words "I´m leaving" at the tip of your tongue,
The guys have already taken another shot, the 7th one back to back.
Tae opens his mouth to speak, presumably about to brag,
" s'easy Jacks-"
but, he can't finish his sentence due to gagging and quickly covering his mouth with his hand.
Of course.
You wince at the sight, Tae stumbles back fast, running and making his way to the bathroom on unstable footing.
That's to not leaving my side tonight, i guess.
A few minutes with Jackson would be fine, you suppose. Tae would be back soon enough.
"Come on princess, take a shot too. Loosen up a bit"
His steps approach you as he talks, his voice sounding like a little devil, waiting to convince you of his foolish plans.
You laugh a small, annoyed laugh,
One hand running through your hair as you talk,
"How many times have i told you I'm not drinking?" unamused, as you look him up and down
But he steps one foot closer, finger grazing your arm maliciously, bringing shivers to your skin at an instant.
"Come on, you need it. Let me give it to you princess, now that Taehyung is gone"
Instinctively tug your arm back, ready to scream in disgust.
But his grip only tightens, a whole palm wrapped around your wirst now, trapping you in his hold as he squeezes.
Angry and scared all at once, you shout at him, the sound coming from the bottom of your throat.
"Fuck off, i told you im not interested"
The pop music playing betrays you, drowning out your screams, reducing it to a hopless yelp.
Filled with rage and mentally cursing at Taehyung for being careless, your eyes flicker to the way which he had left, only to find it filled with everyone but him.
Jacksons arm swiftly moves to grab your hip as he steps closer, his other hand making its way to your waist. He leans down, breath close enough to make every single hair stand up on your neck.
"Fine, if you wanna act so stuck up, hope you know how to swim bitch. Might pull out the stck from your ass"
Before you could process what words had left his mouth, you were lifted up over his shoulders as he ran out the glass door.
no no no no no
A second later you are submerged in the cold water of the pool, splashing loudly,
Not failing to catch everyone´s attention.
The reality of what you had dreaded surrounding you as your mind runs miles.
Muffled you can make out people shouting, the water drowning out the sounds ever so slightly, dimming your lights.
Shutting out any other thoughts.
Fuck.
Helplessly, your arms move, trying to fight your way back up.
Gasping for a breath of air once your face had finally poked out from the greedy water below you,
A laughter breaks,
And another one,
Soon enough it felt like the whole campus was laughing at you, calling you pathetic.
When you manage to climb your way up to the surface completely, holding on to the rim for dear life, you hadn´t yet fully grasped what was going on,.
Everyone else on the other hand had, phones recording your smudged, drenched face and hair, clothes clinging to every nook of your figure, working hard to drag you back down by the heavy weight.
Weakly you pull yourself out of the pool, the sound of laughter still humiliating you, along with Jackson proudly walking off inside the party again.
Probably searching for his next victim.
Absolutely petrified and fucking freezing, you run back to the kitchen were you had left your bag minutes ago. Ready to find Taehyung and get the hell out of this mess.
Minutes before you were thrown in a pool on your first and certainly last frat party, being caught on camera on top of everything.
While pushing through people, you do happen to spot Taehyung,
on the couch,
making out shirtless with a girl that, not surprisingly, Jackson had made out with tonight as well.
That must have been your very last straw, he had not even gone looking for you, not even thinking of why you might be gone.
The dam holding back tears of embarrassment and frustration breaking, evrey single tear you had in you beginning to flow down your face, merging with the chlorinated water that´s already coated along your entirety.
Grabbing your purse and running out, you call the only person you knew to call.
-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈
"FUCK YOU GYUUUU IM WINNING" the XBox Controller tightly clutched in his hand, hunched forward to stare at the screen that lights up his dark bedroom, Jungkook's voice rings through his apartment.
Fifa is not for the weak if you play with Jungkook.
"JEON JUNGKOOK YOU FUCKER" Mingyu screams back, slamming the controller down on the teachers bed.
He lost again, 5th time in a row. There is truly nothing that Jungkook can´t do, it seems.
"Mad huh? Mad?" he laughs, punching into his best friends arm jokingly, a wide and proud smile provoking every one of Mingyu´s nerves at once.
The moment is caught off by his phone ringing, interrupting Mingyu in the middle of trying to deck Jungkook straight in the stomach.
He picks it up, reading your name on his bright screen.
Mingyu, as curious as he is, listens for any words he could make out, planing to use it for teasing Jungkook later on.
Only to be met with loud cries and hics,
"Jungkook please come get me, something horrible happend i wanna go home please pick me up, please come get me, ah fuck" you ramble through sobs, not being able to think straight.
Jungkook's eyes soften at the noise, his eyebrows meeting together as worry washes through his body.
He looks at mingyu who seems equally as worried.
"Hey hey hey, it's okay. Just send me your location, it's okay, i'll drive fast" while he says this, his body shoots up, tucking his phone between his shoulder and face to put on a jacket and gather his keys in the meantime.
Mingyu stands up with him, rushing to put on his own shoes and jacket.
"Thank you, thank you" you mumble again, trying to tap your phone through blurry vision, barely managing to hold it together any second more.
The sounds from the other end stop, his phone slipping back in his pocket.
"Fuck gyu i might end up in jail today if someone fucking touched her" he groans, jutting down the stairs with his best friend following.
"I'll bail you out. Want me to tag along? Might need some help" he asks, wondering what could have possibly made you this upset.
So does Jungkook, thinking of the worst possible situations, a pang of guilt running through him.
Should have come with her, he thinks.
Jungkook shakes his head, "No no, thank you tough. I don't want her to feel unsafe, she might not wanna see anyone right now" his thoughts continue running ballistic, from going to hold you and reassure you that it is okay, to strangling who ever made you sob, made you sound so scared.
Mingyu smiles, "Take good care of her. You care about her a lot, that's good" he pats his back, before making his way down to his own car while Jungkook unlocks his.
Sitting down and scrambling to turn the engine on, he drives as fast as he can through the thankfully empty streets, keeping an eye on your live location in anxiety that it would move.
When he finally spots you, crying messily, squatted down next to a random building, his car pulls over.
Having to fight back the urge to cradle you, wipe all your tears.
Sure, he had seen you upset before, seen you hurt after something and usually, he'd be annoyed,
Having to muster up some empathy.
Not this time, not when you were falling apart in the cold, in the middle of the road.
There was nothing put empathy in his system.
Jungkook runs out of the car, crouching down in front of you, his eyes scanning your figure.
He notices your entire body shaking, clothes clinging to you, soaking wet. Once his eyes move up your face, he sees your wet hair sticking to your face with eyeliner running down to your jaw.
Eyes red and lips trembling.
"Y/n what.. what happened" he reaches forward to set a hand on your arm, his thumb stroking your cold skin, hoping to provide any warmth.
Every thought of beating up the person who had brought you to this state leaving him,
All he cares about when seeing you so fragile is wanting to make you feel okay.
Your voice comes out broken, wiping your tears with unstable hands. Even in the dark of the night, you could make up the worried expression on his face.
You felt ashamed, embarrassed to have to call him, to make him see you like this.
The look on his face earsed every trace of feeling pathetic before his eyes,
Knowing you were safe now.
He had never felt so angry and devastated combined, desperately he wants to stop your tears. Longing for anything that would return you to your usual self.
"home please i, i will tell y-you later"
Jungkook nods, standing up as he signals you to stand up as well.
Holding on to the wall behind you, you get up, only to stumble forward. The cold on your wet skin is too much, the wind pushing you back to the ground,
contributing to your already triggered state of mind.
It is all too much.
His strong arms catch you from falling to the floor, wrapping around your own shivering ones.
"It's okay. Can i carry you inside? Don't want you to fall" his eyes scan for any reaction, any indication of you being even slightly uncomfortable.
But you trust Jungkook, you needed him right now.
So you nod, looking back at him with a noticeable look of appreciation.
Gently, one of his hands move to wrap around your shoulders as he crouches down slightly. His other arm wraps around your thighs, delicately swinging you in his arms bridal style.
The water is dripping on to his own clothes, but he doesn´t even feel it at all, he doesn´t notice how your tears trickle down to his shirt when you try to hold up your head.
How your hair was whipping against his chest with every step.
The way he touches you is sweet enough to erase the marks of disgust left on your skin by Jackson's filthy hands.
Slowly he walks to the car, ducking his head and back to open the back door without having to set you down.
The crying has stopped out of pure exhaustion, although the comforting smell of Jungkook's clothes did contribute a fair amount.
He has begun to feel like home.
His arms reach forward to lay you down in the backseats.
"Try to relax okay? Im gonna get us home fast, it's gonna be okay" he mumbles, stroking your arm reassuringly as he let's go of you.
You don't manage to react in any way, even if your heart had swelled up in your chest.
Jungkook jogs to the drivers seat, making his way inside the car again.
-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈
The whole ride was completely silent. Not even the usual humming habit of Jungkook sounding in the car.
With your back pressed on the seats in the back your eyes are pried open, red and burning from the make up and salt on your face. You´re thinking of blocking Taehyung and never wasting a word on him ever again.
Almost blaming yourself for giving in and coming to the party in the first place.
The car comes to a hold, the familiar street greeting you when you sit back up to look around.
Jungkooks eyes looking at you from the mirror, releasing a breath he had held for way too long.
Thanking himself internally for keeping your vow of not drinking.
He gets out, walking over to open your door and sticking a hand out to you.
You look up at him with the weakest smile he had ever seen, admiring you for even being able to muster up any smile at all.
grit your teeth sometimes and keep going, he had told you back in the hospital.
Your own hand clasping into his, heart skipping a beat as he pulls you up.
His hand never left your own until he had opened the door to his apartment.
He didn't need to ask this time, knowing you would take his hand.
It made him melt when you did.
"I'm gonna get you clothes okay? Sit down on the couch" the words ring in your ears wonderfully, feeling thankful for his help once again.
As he disappears into the guest bedroom, you run your hands down your face in disbelief.
Being thrown in a pool and called a bitch for rejecting guy was not your bucket list, ever.
Coming back with a hoodie and one of your sweatpants as well as socks, he sets them down next to you.
"Thank you kook" you mumble, looking to the floor in sheer embarrassment.
Jungkook had seen you in situations you didn't even know where possible.
"Don't worry. Im gonna get the hair dryer and make up wipes, just say something when you're done changing" his hands reach down to stroke your shoulders.
At this point you knew,
you knew that Jungkook had fully embraces you into his life.
The way his eyes look at you with no sign of the stern glare he still mingled with until now. The way his voice is rough but reassuring, the way his hands keep touching you in an effort to make up for the hurt on your face.
He locks himself in the bathroom, pulling out make up wipes from your cosmetic bag and gathering up the caple of the dryer while you sit on the couch, slowly changing your clothes into warm and dry ones.
Looking at himself in the mirror startled him.
Not even Jungkook could really recognize himself,
Sharp features of his reflection staring back at him with worry, asking himself if you felt okay on his couch right now.
"Done" you shout out, still choked up from the loud sobbing previously, throat itching slightly from the cold.
The door opens once again, walking to you before plugging in the dryer. He sits down, immediately looking at you.
"Here. Take your time okay?"
"Okay" your fingers reach to the wipes, erasing the traces of the ruined make up that you had put on beautifully hours prior.
A pathetic attempt to trust in people that had let you back down again,
Cruel world.
Turning own the dryer, you start combing through your hair softly, finally filling your freezing head with warmth.
Finally making your entire body as warm as the presence of Jungkook.
Silence returns to the room as the device turns off.
"Can i.. tell you about what happend?" wandering to gaze to his soften features, he nods, smiling briefly.
You take a deep breath before mustering up the courage to tell him about the party.
"Taehyung introduced me to this football player who tried to get me into drinking multiple times. He was shirtless and he was super provocative"
He continues listening as your voice becomes weaker.
"They decided to compete in drinking ten shots but Taehyung was already tipsy. And i- Fuck i told him not to. He didn't listen and at the like, 7th shot? He was gagging, stumbling to the bathroom"
You sigh, nervously recalling the events that felt so surreal now, your eyes finally moving to his. Catching him glint at you with nervousness himself.
"He fucking promised me not to leave me alone and- and and then he did and that asshole he-" by now tears are brimming back at your eyes, unable to let out the words in a straight line.
"He fucking touched me and when i told him to back off he called me a bitch and threw me into the pool. Everybody was laughing fuck, Jungkook people were recording it. It was so fucking- it was so"
You stop, aggressively wiping tears from your face, a scoff pained it's way to the surface,
"So humiliating. Even worse, Taehyung was making out with some chick when i managed to get out the pool" your voice is a bit more stable again, angry at the memory.
Resenment is a stronger emotion than sadness in this moment.
"Motherfucker. Both of them. Motherfuckers" Jungkooks eyes turned dark, glaring at the sound of what you went through.
You laugh a small laugh, "I know"
He inches closer to you,
"I'm gonna get them suspended. What was the friends name?" His expression is serious, determined of making them feel it.
You shake your head slowly,
"No don't- please don't go through all that effort okay? They won't make it long anyways"
He glares at you too now, before catching himself doing so, revoking it and replacing it with a neutral expression.
"Don't let them walk all over you. At least that football guy, im getting his scholarship revoked, what he did was assault. Please let me do this for you"
His voice is stern, he isn't asking.
And you knew he was right.
".. Jackson. Wang, i think"
He huffs, "He can kiss his degree goodbye. I'll find something to make em. Promise you. I might just strangle him myself if I'm being honest" he sighs, his hand rubbing his forehead in an effort to not snap and drive back to party.
A soft giggle can be heard inside the suffocating sphere of the living room.
He looks back up at you,
"What's so funny?" a small smile tugging on the corner of his lips,
You giggle again, focused on the way his lips look when trying to hold back a smile.
"You. Seeing you so worked up. I like it, makes me realize this friendship may not be that one sided after all"
He groans in response, leaning back against the couch and tilting his head to look back into your eyes,
"It took me carrying you to my car to make you understand that i care about you?"
Your heart jumping at the admission,
His eyes widen slightly as he hears himself admit to it, but he tries to conceal it.
Play it off like he isn´t surprised himself.
"Letting you live with me for damn near two weeks wasn't enough, huh?" His elbow digs into your side,
But you can't react, stuck on the fact that his teeth are lightly digging into the side of his lip, biting it softly.
Eyes wandering to his torso that is leaning back on his couch, his lap looking so inviting.
Only now noticing how close he is next to you.
It's his turn to chuckle now,
"Would pay to know what's in that pretty head of yours right now"
Another breath caught in your throat, eyes shooting back up to meet his,
They are ranking over you entirely,
Watching your every feature, studying you as if you were a piece of art in a gallery.
His flirty tone making it hard not to just risk it, crawl into his lap and tell him how you feel about his stupidly handsome face and his annoying way to care for you.
"Shut up, you're saying nonsense" your eyes roll to distract from the fact that you were caught red handed, shyly turning your face away from his form on the couch.
"Answer the question idiot. Did it seriously take this long for you to get it?" his voice is soft, sincerity laced beneath his words.
A long sigh makes it's way out of your mouth as you turn to take the same position that he's in, tilting your head to meet his eyes once more.
The moment is precious in a way, his face is so close you could count the moles on it, but just enough space not to loose any and all control.
"I'm not sure. I mean, i guess i knew you kinda cared, but, i think i mostly tried to gaslight myself into thinking you like me as a person and don't just see me as some sort of charity case" you laugh gently, keeping eye contact with him as you talk.
Although the words you're speaking are truthful, they aren't the full extent.
His heart clenches a bit when he thinks about it,
"Charity case? Fuck no, i mean" he pause, playing with his lip piercing,
"I guess it took me some time to get used to caring about someone else like this, living together and shit but i do like you. I find you annoying and obnoxious at times, and you still suck at photography, but i do like you, you're a good friend" his hand moves through his pretty, dark hair, trying his very best not to look down at your lips.
Knowing he wouldn't be able to hold back.
It was now, just now that he became aware too,
Aware that you weren't just a friend, roomate or a student to him,
That his feelings, his thoughts and urges weren't some sort of strange hormonal reaction.
Still, he hoped that saying it out loud would convince him that you are, indeed just a good friend.
He can´t help but notice how bothered he is by it.
You nod, almost disappointed at the way he ruined his lovely speech with three simple words.
a good friend.
"How nice of you.. thank you tho. No really, i, i appreciate you. You're.. a good friend too, Jungkook" you bite your lip softly, wishing for him to just move away or say something mean to lessen the tension.
He allows himself to look once,
Locking his eyes with your lips, noticing the small blush forming around your face.
It makes you look irresistible, naturally beautiful.
"You know I'm a liar, right? That i say a ton of things I don't actuallly mean?" his eyes are focused on your lips now, his voice almost breathless as he feels himself getting lost at the thought of you.
You scoff, chuckling softly right after,
"Absolutely, it's ridiculous, actually. But you know, i learned not to take every you say too seriously" your arm makes it's way to hit his chest playfully.
He laughs briefly, holding your wrist against his chest.
Eyes locked on your lips, just as he had feared they would.
You could practically feel your heart breaking out of your body,
Moving your palm to lay flat against his chest, you allow yourself to touch an inch of what you've been wanting to feel for so long.
"Well i just lied to you again. You're.. fuck. You're not just a friend"
The air in your lungs leaves you hanging completely, a breathless, thoughtless and emotion driven voice answering him
"I swear if you're playing with me right now I'm gonna-"
There was no time to finish your sentence,
In the blink of an eye, his hands are on your face, cupping it,
His soft, dreamy lips on your own.
There wasn't any time to process either as he pulls back briefly, just enough to whisper against your lips,
"You talk too much, and I'm not good with words"
As soon as the last letter leaves his lips, they are back on yours.
The way Jungkook kisses is as you had imagined, possessive and dominant, he needed to guide you.
Needed you to understand that he likes you,
Way more than just a friend.
Finally registering that he's actually kissing you, that this isn't one of your fanatsies, you kiss him back.
Your own lips moving softly against his, earning a small groan from him.
Melting into his kiss even further, the urge to hear his pretty sounds again overtaking you completely.
The strong hands that held your face in place move now, pulling you closer by your hips.
It makes you hum into the kiss,
Allowing him just enough space to lace his tongue in with yours,
Gently but firmly he keeps kissing you.
As infatuated with him as you are, you follow his every lead, moving in sync and savoring every single second.
Lips developing a mind of their own, Jungkook being the only thought.
By now, he is resting his large hands on your hips, shifting to pull you closer once again, sitting you on his lap,
One knee on either side of his hips, both your hands pressed firmly against his chest.
The way he pulled you to straddle him made you gasp lowly.
He smiles into the kiss, clearly affected by the way this conversation had gone,
By the way you react to his touches.
Naturally, your arms wrap around his neck, allowing your hips to rest on his, he hums in approval, gripping your hips and tightly and securing them in place for him.
Before you can wonder what all of this meant or where it was leading, he pulled back again, this time enough to get a full view of your flustered face.
At first, he doesn't say anything, making space for insecurity to creep up into your brain,
Apparently he can look into those too.
"To be clear. This means something to me. I'm not kissing you just because you looked fucking irresistible, but because i like you, i like you way more than I should. And if you don't, then you better tell me now"
Once again, his pretty face doesn't match his stern words, he's nervous.
You could tell by the way he licks his piercing, nibbling on the small metal ring.
If it was even more possible, your heart swelled with affection for him, desperate to tell him what you had felt for so long.
"I like you too. I like you way too much. Wasn't it obvious? I wanted this for so long"
Without wanting to waste any more time on things you could discuss later on, your head leans back down to kiss him.
He groans much softer this time, his hands ranking up to your sides, feeling them up slowly.
He needs to touch you, feel you, kiss you everywhere.
Just like he had imagined for long now, chopping it up to feeling touch starved.
But the words urge out of his mouth,
"I guess that means you're mine now" he mumbles against your lips in a sultry voice, the heat of the moment becoming far too much.
This wasn't just out of hormonal instincts, both of you could feel it.
A smile latches on to your lips, forcing you to stop kissing him for just a second
"Possessive, i see.. but i want to know much more about you first kook" your reply is sheepish, well aware that him calling you his was enough to turn your underwear see through.
He hums again, placing a hand on your cheek, stroking his thumb against it as his eyes move to your lips.
"I'll tell you everything you want later, let me keep kissing you first" his thumb drags down to your bottom lip, stroking it gently as his pretty brown eyes fixate back on your own ones, looking for resistance.
"Kiss me then" was all it took for him to close the gap once again.
Your arms unwrap around him, moving in anticipation when they reach the hem of his shirt.
You tug on it gently, asking for him to remove it.
He groans once more, "so eager" slips past his lips when he makes enough room to take the shirt off,
Revealing what must be the most beautifully, carefully carved person you have ever laid your eyes on.
His tattoos reach up to his shoulder, you've seen it before but it's even better when you get to touch them, carefully trace the lines with your finger tip.
His chest is firm, a broad set of shoulders that make his small and very well-defined abdomen look even more sinched.
The sight is truly breath taking, your hands caressing, touching everywhere they can.
He likes to think that it doesn't phase him, but the way his body shivers makes it undeniable.
"Done staring, doll?" he asks, the nickname sending a wave of pleasure straight through you as he tilts your face back up to look at his.
"Mhm.. you're just really hot" you can't help but giggle, finally being able to touch and kiss him, it makes you giddy.
Finally being able to utter out all your dirty thoughts, even if it embarrasses you.
He rolls his eyes, sneaking his hands teasingly under your hoodie, caressing the soft and bare skin of your stomach.
A low moan follows his movement, you attempt to kiss him but he smirkes, leaning his head back softly.
This time you whine, having already guessed that he's as much of a tease as he normally is too.
"You sound so desperate. Want me too take this off hm?"
You only muster up a small nod, in no time the hoodie is thrown somewhere, forgotten easily by the way his eyes sparkle when landing on your chest.
Roaming over your chest down to your hips, taking in every inch as his hands reach to grab them.
In one swift motion, you're tucked beneath him on the couch, his shirtless figure hovering over yours, veiny hands resting on your stomach, softly touching his way upwards.
"Just tell me to stop if you don't want anything" he's considered, gentle in the same way that he's demanding.
"Will do, but right now i really need you to continue"
He smiles, leaning down to kiss you again before moving to kiss down to your neck, softly burrying himself in it.
Hearing you moan and gasp was enough to make him lose his mind, make him want to give you absolutely everything you could ever ask for.
"Feels.. nice.." your hands play with his hair, holding the back of his head firmly against your neck.
He bites your neck in response, one of his hands moving to cup your chest in it, squeezing and groping firmly.
He keeps kissing, licking and gently sucking at your skin, trying to learn about every spot that made you moan a little louder.
Once he's satisfied with your neck, a short kiss is placed on your lips.
His head trails down to your chest, kissing from collarbone further south.
"You look even prettier than i imagined" he mutters against your skin, lips in the space between your breasts, kissing and sucking carefully.
"I-Imagined?" you manage to say between soft moans, to shy to let out what you really felt.
Your teeth biting down on your lip so hard it could have made an imprint.
He chuckles against your skin,
"Mhm.. many times doll, driving me insane with these pretty sounds, keep making noises" his voice is deep, underlined with desire.
"f-feels so good.." your whines filling is request instantly, feeling his lips wrapped around your breast as the other one is being gently cupped and squeezed, making you feel blissfully satisfied.
He switches sides after a couple more seconds, your eyes focused on his hand that looks so large compared to you.
However the sight of his bare and definitely well toned, broad back peeking out made you feral, needing to touch him too.
So you do, moving to wrap your arms under his, touching his back carefully as sinfully sweet noises come out of both your lips.
His lips move from your chest to your own, both of his hands groping your chest, moving and brushing over your spots carefully, hitting ever sensitivity.
He lets go of your chest just as he lets go of your lips, his hands making their way down to your waist, wrapping around and securing you in place.
Jungkook´s beautiful dark eyes can't seem to leave your body, licking his lips before planting gentle open mouth kisses down your stomach, nibbling at the skin every so slightly.
"Can i take this off?" his tattooed fingers playing with the hem of your pants, teasing and tugging beneath it with a sly smile on his face.
"Yes please" almost pathetically quiet you answer him, desperate for him to touch you, to make you see stars.
He nods, pulling down your pants to reveal white lacy panties beautifully placed over your core.
Jungkook doesn't like to waste time, so he moves his hands up and down your thighs while kissing your hip,
"So soft" purring against your skin, his lips move to kiss your thighs, hooking one arm gently under one leg, spreading them open. His kisses become more passionate which each one, kissing and nibbling the inside of your thighs,
Dangerously close to where you wanted him to be right now.
Your hand wraps around his soft curls once more, gently tugging, making him groan.
"Doing so well doll, i know you're desperate, so needy. Gonna give it to you yeah? Ask nicely" the way he sounds right now, raspy and gentle, the way he uses the nickname that rolls beautifully off of his tongue, it is enough to make you whimper.
Close to being speechless, you stammer out softly, needing him more than anything.
"Please kook.. touch me.. please eat me out, fuck this is so embarrassing" your hand untangles from his hair, both of them meeting to cover your face.
A small laugh can be heard before he moves his own hands up, prying yours from your face by your wrist.
He scans your face, your slightly parted lips inviting him to a kiss once more.
"Don't hide pretty, sound so good when you're this pathetic and desprate. Gonna give you just what you asked for"
He hooks his arm back under your thigh, the other one holding you by the knee. Letting his eyes wander down to your core for just a moment, he takes in the sight of your soaked underwear, basically transparent.
It made him twitch in his pants,
Knowing that he has just about the same effect on you as you do on him.
He presses a kiss your still covered clit, tongue poking out to lick over it, pressing the fabric to your skin.
It doesn't take long for him to move his tongue down to your entrance, licking slow stripes across and using the tip of his tongue to push the fabric into your slit a little bit.
It fills you with excitement and frustration,
"Please stop teasing me.. please" your whines are much louder now, annoyed that you're so close to finally feeling the relief you need.
Finally knowing how it feels to have him touch you.
He groans softly, quickly pulling the panties down to your ankles before latching on to suck on your clit.
The feeling is euphoric, nothing compares to seeing Jungkook's pretty face burried between your thighs, his lips wrapped around your clit as his tongue gently darts across it.
He moves his tongue down, caressing your thighs with his hands, tasting every drop of arousal spilling out from you.
His body is filled with the need to feel your every reaction, touch where ever he can reach.
The tip of his tongue pushing into your hole ever so slightly, before moving to lick back up to your clit.
Ever since he started you haven't stopped moaning, softly rambling about how good he feels.
"Look so pretty.. fuck it feels so- so good.." your voice trails off into a whimper, the knot in your stomach tightening with each lick, his soft groans only intensifying the pleasure.
Helplessly your hips buck into his face,
he takes it gladly, humming in approval.
"You'll take a finger won't you doll?" he says as his pointer finger is already circling your entrance, ghosting over it.
As a response, your hips buck up again slightly, moving both hands to grab his shoulders, nodding furiously at his question.
"Words. Will you take it?´´ he repeats, his tongue returning back to licking your folds once he finished speaking.
"Yes, yes, yes will take it"
"Good, very good" he pushes his single digit in without any further warning, sinking in until his knuckle stops him, immediately pumping in an out.
"So fucking small doll, only my finger and you´re suffocating it, so greedy" the vibration of his low purring only supporting your approaching orgasm.
For a moment Jungkook allows himself to look at you, face fucked out completely, eyes weakly staring down at him,
Your mouth opened softly as gasps and whines leave your mouth.
It keeps him going to see you enjoy it, his finger speeding up as his licks become more firm.
The pleasure built up fast from that point, feeling like you would snap and come on his tongue and finger at any moment, clenching around it.
He moans softly on your skin when he feels it,
"Close? Are you gonna coat my finger with your cum pretty?"
"Jungkook- fuck yes, close. God, the way you talk is driving me insane" your legs pick up shaking again, fingers digging into his shoulders when your whole body shudders against him.
His voice, his hands, lips, face burried between your thighs, it all creats a beautiful picture, unforgettable.
"Come on doll, give it to me, let me taste it" his lips move to wrap around your clit,
Which is all that you needed to come undone under his touch, shaking and whimpering loudly.
He slowly retracts his mouth, stroking your thighs and gently moving his fingers to let you ride out the high, before removing it completely as you still pant from the pleasure.
Naked and slightly bruised chest moving heavily, clit swollen and throbbing.
He places a small kiss against your hip,
"Did so well, sounded so fucking pretty, taste so sweet"
You look at him wide eyed as he licks his finger clean, clearly enjoying every drop of your release he could get.
His hand reach down to your ankles, pulling your panties back up and kissing your newly covered clit one last time.
"Come here, calm down yeah? You on earth doll?" he chuckles in a cocky and low tone, pulling himself up next to you and placing a kiss on to your forehead.
The absolute aftershock and realization hitting you, immediately blushing the darkest shade of red and hiding against his chest.
"Oh.. my..god. what the fuck just.." mumbling against his chest he strokes your back and hair softly. A small effort to reassure you.
"No don't. Don't say it. I know what happened but.. i mean.. what.." you continue, not knowing how to act know, not knowing what to say.
Asking yourself if that meant you were his now, like he had said before.
"Well, you tell me. I said you're mine, you're the one wanting to know things" he puts one hand under your chin, lifting your face to his and pressing a kiss to your lips.
Although his eyes look neutral, his kiss is filled with care.
You smile against his lips,
"Fuck whatever i said, i can learn while being yours, if the offer still stands"
He scoffs, flicking your forehead once he pulls away from the kiss
"You're an idiot. Of course it does"
It was hard not to giggle when he's being so stupid after giving you the best orgasm of your life.
It's your turn to kiss him now, placing a small peck to his cheek and another one to his jaw.
His lips curve into a softy smile, "Come on, let's go to bed hm?"
Your head tilts at his suggestion, knowing full well that he's fully errect,
You can feel him pressed against you after all.
"But.. what about you?" he strokes your hair before holding your cheek in his palm, a cheeky grin on his lips.
"Don't worry, i don't really care for that right now, besides I don't want to tire out miss virgin Mary hm?" his hand moves down to your chin, squeezing your cheeks between his thumb and remaining fingers.
Instead of reacting, your entire body freezes, looking at him with an expressionless face.
"What? Think i couldn't tell? Come on, you were a mess from kissing, so tight around only a single finger doll. Not that hard to miss" he chuckles, kissing your forehead another time, all the while you wish you could disintegrate into the ground.
Sure, it might have been easy to tell, but did have to keep teasing?
"Oh my god you're unbelievable. Do you.. uh, mind that i didn't say anything?"
His hand moves to grab your hoodie that was surprisingly not far gone, tapping your arms to signal you to lift them up,
"No, i don´t. I get it, i mean, I'm not that experienced either and at my age that is kind of embarrassing to admit as well" he speaks carefully while slipping the hoodie back over you, moving some strands of hair out of your face.
You nod, smiling at his delicate gesture.
"I see, you're sure that you're okay?"
He rolls his eyes,
"Yes, I'm sure. Come on, let's go to bed, I´m tired, i know you´re too" he shifts, picking up his tossed shirt and your pants only to throw them on the couch when he stands up.
You´re still sitting, eyes moving down to the very visible bulge in his pants, straining them in a sexy and arousing way.
He snorts, waving a hand in front of your face before he grabs yours, pulling you up and leading you to his bedroom.
"Kook?" you ask him, a million questions running through your mind at once.
Everything that happened after the intimacy is so normal, almost thoughtlessly routine.
His presence being so comforting and complete to you, you did not even need to ask why you should sleep next to him, or if it was okay to do so.
"Yes?" he answers, pulling the covers on his bed back and stepping closer to hold you by your waist and staring you down,
A look of admiration on his face, his eyes practically screaming the words I love you
"So.. we.. uhm.. this is official now?" was somehow the only condensed version of all the thoughts you could gather together.
He smiles, lifting you briefly to lay you on his bed, climbing in to lay beside you, his hand immediately finding your face again.
"What does it look like? How many times do you need me to confess? Damn, im starting to think doll, that this gets you off" he wraps his arms around you, pulling you closer to his warm body.
Your feelings for him intensifying in that very second,
"No, but i do get off on that nickname. And the way you're so touchy. Kinda cute" you scrunch your nose up, putting your arms on his body as well.
"Shut up. Sleep well yeah?" he says, tucking your head under his to stop you from seeing the shyness spread across his cheeks, accompanied by the smile visible in his voice.
"Sleep well, kook. but.."
"Oh my god what is it?" he groans, squeezing your body to show off his annoyance.
You giggle softly,
"Thank you. For saving my ass today and uh.. for, you know" the last words leave your mouth in a stuttered manner, too shy to speak out what you are referring to.
He scoffs playfully, "21 and can't say the word orgasm. Whatever, get used to it doll, gonna take care of you from now on"
Knowing it didn't matter how annoyed he was, nothing could take away the fact that you're falling asleep in his arms this very second.
It made both of your hearts melt.
337 notes · View notes
gojobbg · 2 months ago
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I’d love to hear your Megumi headcanons - sfw and not if he’s aged up ♡ and mostly, best of luck for the new blog! Ily!
Hi! Thank you for the ask, and thank you sm for the luck. I feel so warmly welcomed by you all :) 🫶🏽
For the sake of my excitement, lets do sfw AND nsfw in the context of him being aged up
warning: this is mad long omg so sorry xo i go overboard a lot with my ask reqs so please beware.
SFW - reader(f) x bf!megumi: to me, he's such a non-PDA person, but he won't just ignore you/is affectionate in his own quiet way.
Megumi absolutely pays attention to the little things you do. Whenever you two are out and there's something that even slightly piques your interest, he would silently grab it and try to secretly pay for it. Then, when you see it in the bag and ask him, he'll just be like 'oh maybe they were givin' stuff away for certain purchases.' Like the sweet liar he is. He will absolutely give in to your desires, even if you don't need it.
Megumi is also a man who loves being affectionate, he just hates showing it. Like if you're cold, he won't offer you his jacket, he WILL give you his jacket. If you're thirsty and can't open your water bottle, he'll just grab it from you and snap it open before giving it back. I love the idea of people constantly telling you like what do you see in him and then mentioning all this.
Dinner with him includes him constantly giving you part of his plate, and getting so much satisfaction from watching you eat. He just loves everything that you do, truly. He asks you multiple times if you want anything else to eat and refills your water for you before the waiter comes because he knows you feel awkward when they randomly appear to refill it for u during a conversation.
"I don't know if you'll like this but it reminded me of you" type gift giving. He's usually right, but always looks away from you whenever he gives you things. It's the consideration that count, and you appreciate it endlessly.
He loves when you touch his hair. For someone who can be grumpy and sensitive to touch, his hair is extremely intimate to him and trusts you enough. He would always look away n blush whenever your fingers scratched the back of his head/weaved through his locks. He would never ask for it, but he would sometimes tilt his hair towards you just to see if you would just do it casually.
NSFW - reader(f) x bf!megumi (aged up): unlike his public displays of affection, his private ones are like phewwww. But he will absolutely let you know in public that he needs it, and immediately.
His little code to tell you he's horny is to rub one of the palms of your hands. He acts so quiet and shy and mysterious but he's very forward with what he wants. If you ignore these advances, he applies pressure by pressing against your body in tight spaces like elevators or crowded areas. Even if its not crowded, Megumi will corner you with hungry eyes.
Megumi is a man of business. Even when he comes home exhausted from a mission, he will pick you up from anywhere and press you against the wall with lust in his eyes and desperation in his lips. It could be anywhere in the house, he does not give a fuck. He'd pin you against a wall and begin fingering you, just to fuck you in that same hallway. "Your pussy is so perfect..." type flirting.
He's an ass man (I know he's an ass man). You would wake up in his arms, with his large calloused hands kneading your ass. A string of complimentary curses would leave his lips whenever he got the chance to massage your ass during lazy days. He loved to rub on it, give it plenty of kisses and hickies. It's the reason you don't let him give you a massage often, since his attention would stay at your cheeks.
"Let me fuck the lights out of you" Megumi is peak. His fingers would dig into your thighs, demanding surrender. He loved dragging his fingers along the dip of your back when you rode him perfectly sat up. He'd even grab you by the ass and bounce you on his cock himself whenever he grew impatient. Even though he loves when you take over, he mainly likes taking control to make sure you feel good, always.
He loves being overstimulated. Even after several rounds, his mouth would completely dry whenever you tried enticing him again for another fuck. He could feel the pain in his cock, but because it was you, he was completely down for another round. He practically cried but always begged for you to keep going. "F-fuck, it's t-too much-- please--don't stop~!"
I hope this satisfied your ask, anon <3 ~ gabby
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javierpena-inatacvest · 1 year ago
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You're My Home
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Summary: You and Javi have both had one of those weeks where no matter how hard you try, nothing seems to go right. It only takes so long before something stupid makes the both of you snap. When Javi confesses to you what's been putting him on edge, you find a way to make it up to each other.
Word Count: 4.9K
Pairing: Javier Peña x f!reader (no use of y/n)
Warnings: SMUT (18+), established relationship, unprotected p in v sex (wrap before u tap), vaginal fingering, creampie, angst, PTSD (poor Javi has a panic attack but you help him through it), hurt/comfort, makeup sex (!!!!), bad communication but apologizing/forgiving each other, mentions of food/eating, reader wears Javi's shirt and is carried by Javi, fluff fluff fluff bc you two are so in love with each other it hurts
This can be read as a stand alone or as a part of the It's Never Too Late Series!
A/N: I don't know what's been in the water that has me so compelled to make something angsty, but here we are!! Once I started writing this I quite literally could not stop, and it turned out to be one of the most intimate things I have ever written 😭🥺 I love these two sm
It had been a week. 
A long fucking week. 
One of those weeks where it felt like no matter how hard you tried, everything just felt… off. You had just started volunteering to run the Alma Pierce Elementary School drama club, which had you staying an extra hour and a half after school every Monday and Wednesday, on top of preparing for Parent-Teacher Conferences next week. You loved your group of students this year, but holy shit, were they chatty, and the past few days you felt like you might as well have put a cardboard cutout of yourself at the front of the room and left, because your class had absolutely zero interest in paying attention to you. To top it off, you could tell that Javi was having a bad week too. You hadn’t seen much of each other the past few days, with you working late and prepping for conferences, and Javi working on a new project the department had dropped in his lap without notice. Even though you lived in the same apartment, you had felt like strangers this week. Sure, you’d had off days before, but the two of you were always open and honest with each other, seeking comfort and safety in the other's presence, knowing that you were both there for one another, through good times, and bad. 
But this week was not like those “off” days. Something about it had felt tense, cold, even. You hated it. You hated every second of it. The two of you were never like this. Javi was your best friend, yet somehow, sitting in the same room, you still felt a million miles apart. Every interaction that you’d had left a worse taste in your mouth than the last- snapping at each other over stupid things like unclosed containers in the fridge or leaving towels on the bathroom floor. The worst was that Javi just could not seem to let things go, his presence feeling overbearing, almost bossy, with everything that you did. 
“You left the iron on while you were getting ready, you’re gonna burn down the fucking aparment.” 
“Double check the locks on the door, you forgot this morning.” 
“If you don’t fix the bath mat before you get in the shower, you’re gonna break your goddamn head open.” 
Even worse than that, when you tried to politely remind Javi about something, or do something helpful for him, he had been a complete asshole to you. 
“Yes, I can remember to clean it up after I’m done, I’m not fucking 8 years old.” 
“Jesus, I know we need more coffee creamer, you put it on the grocery list and reminded me twice.” 
“I can put away my own laundry, just let me do it.” 
It felt like he was breathing down your neck, the fly in your ear that just wouldn’t go away, and it made you want to scream. You had considered yourself to be a pretty patient person- working with kids, you had to be, but this week, Javier Peña seemed to be testing every ounce of patience you had left in your body, and you were about to run out.  
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Your Friday night routine with Javi normally consisted of the 3 same things every week
Javi picking up pizza from place down the street on the way home from work
Eating the pizza and watching a movie 
Pausing said movie to have sex, finish watching the movie, and then fall asleep on the couch. 
On this particular Friday, you had a very strong suspicion that none of those 3 things would be happening tonight. When you came home, you practically collapsed from exhaustion the moment you got through the door. Dropping your bag and kicking off your shoes, you crawled your way to the couch, completely collapsing in its cushions, taking a few deep breaths to try and regain your composure from the hellish day it had been. You finally mustered up enough strength to get up and change out of your work clothes into something more comfortable before sulking around the apartment, making yourself finish chores that had seemed to go neglected all week. Javi was normally home a half hour after you, but as you looked up at the clock, he was 20 minutes later than usual. It wasn’t long before another hour had gone by, leaving you absolutely starving, unable to wait for the dinner Javi may or may not be bringing home. You scavenged through your fridge and pantry, pulling out sauce and spaghetti to make yourself pasta to at least tide you over. 
When Javi got home two hours past his normal arrival, you were shocked by the smell of pizza that filled your apartment as he walked through the door. You were even more shocked by the reaction he had to seeing the pot of noodles you had left out on the stove while you sat at the kitchen table to finish report cards to hand out at conferences. 
“Did you already fucking eat?” His tone was sharp and brash as he dropped the pizza box on the kitchen counter. 
“Well you’re home two hours later than normal, Javi. What was I supposed to do? Not eat? I’m more than capable of fending for myself if you’re not here with pizza.” You could feel pressure in your stomach rising, clenching your fists to try and hold in the last bit of patience you had. 
“That’s not the fucking point. You know I always get pizza for us on Friday, you know I’m bringing you dinner, I can’t help that things have been a shit show at work and I’m still trying to at least do something to take care of you.” 
Take care of you? Nuh, uh. That was the last straw. 
You stood up out of your chair, palms flat on the table as you glared at Javi. “Take care of me? Seriously, Javi? Like I’m some sort of helpless little puppy that can’t fend for themself? I am more than fucking capeable of taking care of myself, and this whole week you have been acting like I am literally incapable of doing anything in this house. Listen, I can tell things have been shitty for you at work, and this week has sucked for me too, but every time I try to go do something nice for you, something to actually help take care of you? You’re already halfway down my goddamn throat, telling me to stop or fix whatever it is I’m doing.” Your heart was racing, blood pumping through your veins so intensely, you could feel your hands begin to shake. 
“Because it’s my fucking job to take care of you!” He growled, pinching the bridge of his nose between his fingers as you stood with your hands on your hips, laughing at him in the least humorous way possible. 
“Your job? Your fucking job? You don’t think I’m capable of taking care of myself? That’s fucking great. So you can take care of me, but I can’t take care of you? Yeah, that makes sense. Un-fucking-believeable. I don’t know what the fuck has been going on with you this past week, but I can’t do this right now. I’m going on a fucking run.” You stormed to the door, throwing on your shoes as you white knuckled your keys in your grasp. 
“You fucking hate running!” Javi yelled, clenching his jaw before burying his hands in his face. 
“I don’t fucking care!” You grunted back, deliberately slamming the door behind you as you sauntered down the stairs of your apartment to the parking lot. Javi was right, there was no physical activity you hated more than running. You weren’t really sure what your plan was, just that you couldn’t stand there fighting with Javi anymore. You could feel the adrenaline flowing through you, enough to make you pick up your feet and actually begin sprinting down the sidewalk. You just kept running. Running until you could feel your sides begin to hurt, until your eyes began to sting from the tears welling behind them, until your chest felt like it was collapsing in on you, making you stop in the middle of the cement pathway in a full on breakdown. You could barely catch your breath, sobbing, as your hands dropped to your knees, your body trembling with each pathetic whimper. 
What the fuck were you doing? Why was Javi being like this? Why were you being like this? Why won’t he just talk to you? Why can you just not make things right? Why was the one person you loved more than anything in the world the one who was making you feel like you’d been run over by a semi-truck? 
Wiping your tears and snot with your sleeve, you took a deep breath and turned around to head home, determined to get to the bottom of whatever was causing you to both suffer through the worst week ever.
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“Javi?” You peeked into the apartment, your voice barely above a whisper. 
“What?” He answered, his voice still sharp, making you wince as you walked over to the couch where he sat. 
“Javi… Javi what’s going on? I can’t do this anymore. If I did something to make you mad, I’m sorry, I just-” 
“Fucking work has just been a shit show, okay?” He snapped, cutting off your sentence. “I’m going to bed, I’m fucking exhausted.” He sighed as he got up, storming his way down the hallway, leaving you there alone on the couch, your bottom lip quivering as the tears began to stream down your face again, leaving you in a silent, sobbing heap on the couch. 
You waited a while before getting into bed with Javi, entering your bedroom in its already dark state to avoid crossing paths while the two of you finished your nighttime routines. You crawled into your comforter, eyes still red and puffy as you lay back to back with Javi, without so much as even a good night, let alone, an “I love you.” 
You could feel yourself stirring, tossing and turning in your sleep as you rolled over, outstretching your arm to an unfamiliarly empty space. You turned over to face Javi, now finding yourself wide awake at the fact that he wasn’t there next to you. Immediately, you shot up, calling out his name as you got out of bed, wondering where the hell he was. As you made your way into the hallway, you whispered his name once more before hearing the sounds of heavy, labored breathing coming from the living room. You rushed in, finding Javi sitting on the floor, his hand grasping at his chest with a look of pure panic on his face. 
“I feel like… Fuck, I feel like I can’t breathe. My heart is beating so fast.” He whimpered between his shaky breathing and sobs. “I just- I just kept seeing it over and over again in my head and I woke up and it still wouldn’t go away. Every when I wake up, it’s like it’s fucking haunting me. I feel like something’s crushing my chest. Baby, what’s happening?” He gasped as he looked up at you, helpless and desperate.  
Oh no. Oh no, oh no, oh no. You knew exactly what was happening. 
Immediately, you climbed into his lap, wrapping yourself around him as tightly as possible, stretching your arms as widely as you could around the broadness of his body. You tried to slow your breathing down, taking long inhales and exhales as you held him. “Just breathe, baby. It’s okay. You’re safe, I promise. I’m here. Deep breaths, okay?” 
“Osita, I can’t- Fuck. Fuck, fuck.” His voice was trembling, each word low and labored as he grasped at the back of his shirt you had draped over your back. 
“I know, baby. I know. I know it’s scary. I promise that you’re safe. I’m here, okay? Just breathe. In and out. I’m not leaving. You’re safe with me, I promise it will be okay.” Even though your heart was shattering, you did everything you could to be the calm in his storm, whispering your reassurances in your soft, sweet voice. Slowly but surely, you could feel the intensity of his breaths lessen, the rising and falling of his chest easing as he grasped tighter at your shirt, pulling you closer to him. 
“It’s okay, Javi. It’s okay. Listen, I’m gonna ask you to do something, alright? It’s gonna sound stupid but it’s gonna help.” You could feel him nod against your chest, his sobs finally beginning to slow. “Can you open your eyes and tell me 5 things you see?” You felt him lift his head, looking up at you, his face wet and red as his deep brown eyes locked with yours.
“Fuck, um, the- the wall, the carpet, the uh, um, the couch, shit, the TV, you. I can see you.” 
“Okay, perfect. What about 4 things you can touch, like feel in your hands?” You smiled gently at him as his breathing was now at a near normal rate. He raised up his arm, wiping his damp face with his palm. 
“My fucking wet face.” The both of you smirked, bringing you relief that Javi was already half laughing. “The carpet, my shirt, that always looks better on you than it does on me. Fuck, I can feel your skin, it’s always so soft. I love feeling it.” He ran one of his hands along the bare skin of your thigh, his fingers grasping at your flesh. 
“You’re doing great, baby. How about 3 things you can hear?” 
“Um, the cars outside, the fan, I could feel your heartbeat when I was on your chest.” He pressed his head back against you, raking your fingers through the ends of his damp curls, sticking to his forehead from his panicked sweat. 
Okay, almost done. What about 2 things you can smell?” You asked, running your fingers along the nape of his neck. 
“Your shirt smells like laundry. No matter how hard I try it just always smells better when you do it. And your shampoo. It always smells so sweet and fruity, it’s my favorite.” He buried his face in the crook of your neck, his hand gently tugging at the ends of your hair, twisting his fingers through it. 
“Okay, last one. Something you can taste.” He lifted his head, looking at you as he slid the hand in your hair to cradle your jaw, cupping your face. 
“You.” He rasped, his lips barely pressing against yours, feeling the hot breaths between your mouths as they met. He pulled back, pausing for a moment before he spoke. “Baby…I’m so sorry. I’m so fucking sorry. This week has been all my fault. I’m so sorry I didn’t say anything. It’s been so long since I’ve felt like this and I was scared. I was so fucking scared.” 
“Javi, it’s okay. Please, I just want to be here for you. You know you can tell me anything, okay? I love you, Javi. I love you more than anything. I know it hurts to talk about the things that scare you the most, but it’s even scarier watching the person you love hurt so badly and not knowing what to do to help them. I don’t care what it is, baby. There’s nothing you can tell me that’s gonna scare me away.” The look on his face nearly broke you. You could tell he was so hurt. Hurt by whatever had been haunting him. Hurt by the fact he wasn’t okay. Hurt by the fact that he had hurt you. 
“The project I’ve been working on this week… It all started because of how bad things are getting across the border in Mexico. A mom was out with her kids and they were all shot in a hit and run accident between two people making a drug trade. It was only an hour from here. I watched so many people do so many fucked up things that I thought I would never have to worry about again once I got home. And even if I did, I was going to be the only person I needed to worry about. But I couldn’t stop imagining that mom with her kids was you. You and our future kids. Every night since that fucking case file got set on my desk, I wake up to the same fucking nightmare of me running down the street, trying to grab you, push you, do anything to get you out of the way, but every fucking night I’m never fast enough. All I can do is watch as that bullet goes through you and you fall to the ground. I can’t let it happen to you. What if something goes wrong and I can’t protect you? I couldn’t fucking live with myself. I just want to keep you safe Osita. I’m so sorry. I love you too much to lose you.” 
Fuck. 
It wasn’t long before you were crying with him, squeezing him tightly once again, pressed against the warmth of his bare chest. That’s what had been going on. That’s why he had been so overbearing. That’s why he hadn’t been the Javi that you’d known and loved this week. On the night he’d told you the worst of the things he had seen and done away in Colombia, you had seen how his eyes had filled with regret, remorse, even anger. But this was different. Never once in the time that you’d known him had you seen Javi so scared. The look in his eyes when you found him sitting on the floor was one of pure terror. You couldn’t imagine what it would be like, waking up night after night to the image of Javi slipping away, let alone coming to grips with the reality that you couldn’t even fathom, and he knew far too well. Javi knew you had no problem sticking up for yourself. You were strong, tough, and fiercely independent- those were all things he loved so much about you. But those things weren’t enough to protect you from the dangers that haunted his past, or the terrifying reality of the present. 
Through the silent cries of your sobs, you felt Javi’s hand under your chin, lifting your head to force your eyes to meet. “Osita, I’m so sorry. Pease, please forgive me. I’ve been so lost in my own world this week because I’ve been so scared about what could happen to you. I had my head so far up my own ass that I thought I was doing everything I could to try and keep you safe in any way that I could, and instead I’ve just been a fucking dick to the person I care about more than anything in the world. I don’t wanna fight anymore, I fucking hate it. I’m so fucking sorry.” 
You draped your arms around his neck, your fingers tracing small, gentle circles along his back as you stared back at him. “I didn’t know, Javi. I didn’t know you were so scared. I’m so sorry. I don’t wanna fight anymore either. This has been the shittiest week. I missed you. I missed my best friend.” He pressed his hand against the back of your head, cradling it in his palm as he hugged you tightly. “You just have to promise me something, okay?” 
“Anything. Anything, baby.” 
“You have to promise me that you can’t keep all of this in. You have to promise me you’ll talk to someone about it. Me, your dad, people at work, Steve, a therapist, someone. There are so many people who care so much about you who just wanna help. You’re the strongest person I know, Javi, but it’s okay to not be strong sometimes.” He let out a long, shaky breath, darting his eyes down at the ground, the Adam's apple bobbing in his throat as he swallowed. “You promise me?” You asked again, grabbing his face in your hands, swiping your thumb along his wet cheeks. 
“I promise.” 
In that moment, it was like the two of you could feel something in the air change. The tension lifting, the frustrated fog fading, the both of you desperately needing the other to know how sorry you were for the way you had acted. You found yourself face to face, eyes closing as your mouths came together in the most gentle, tender kiss. But even as your parted lips barely pressed against one another, you could practically feel how desperate you both were. 
“I love you.” 
Even though you whispered it against the soft, unshaven stubble of Javi’s cheek, it feels like you’re screaming it, determined to make sure he hears those 3 words as they fall from your lips, that he knows how much you mean each one, every second of every hour of every day. You can feel the heat in your chest as his hands grasp around the small of your back, pulling you closer as your bodies melt together, the tension straining in your muscles dissipating with each second he pulls you closer. 
“I love you too.” 
It felt like suddenly, all was right with the world again. The Javi you knew and loved had come back, returning home to you. All of the fear and sadness was replaced by a rampant desperation to know how much you needed him, almost as much as he needed to show you how desperately he craved you, too. The tingle built at the base of your spine as his fingers toyed with the hem of your shirt, his hand creeping further up your belly, pressing against the curves of your sides. You raised your arms as his fists balled up the worn fabric, carefully lifting it over your head as his hot breath ran against your neck, leaving gentle, tender kisses along your newly exposed skin. Your hands pressed against his hips, tugging at the waistband of his cotton sleep shorts as he locked his arms under your legs, bringing you both to stand as you wrapped your legs around the small of his back, the skin of your bare chests brushing against each other as he carried you toward the bedroom. Each kiss of your parted lips was like a plea, begging that the other would forgive you, that despite the way you had treated each other there was no one in the world that you loved more, that you would rather be with right here, right now. 
Crossing the threshold to the bedroom, Javi leaned his body over the mattress, carefully placing you down in the warm, tangled sheets of your bed that had felt so cold and harsh only a few hours ago. You looked up at Javi standing at the end of the bed as he nudged his shorts off of his hips, leaving him exposed, the clothes now pooling around his ankles. Crawling over you, he hooked his fingers around the waistband of your underwear, the only thing left on your body after your shirt had been left behind in the living room. You lifted your hips, helping him shuffle the fabric down your legs as he ran his hands along the meat of your thighs. He leaned over you, the temples of your foreheads pressed against each other as his fingers danced along the skin of your bare legs, barely grazing against your entrance. You could already feel the slick of your arousal pooling under his touch, the calloused pads of his fingers ever so gently tracing up and down your folds, making you shutter. 
“Javi... Please.” Your voice trembled as Javi nodded, burying his face in the crook of your neck. You gasped as you felt the thickness of his fingers heedfully pushing themselves inside you, arching your back against the bed as his thumb delicately pressed on your clit. Each thrust of his hand in and out of your heat was dragging and deliberate, the rubbing of his fingertip along your sensitive bundle of nerves making your moans muffled against his chest. Every touch of his hand made you feel better than the last, but there was something primal about the way that you needed him inside you, how you ached to feel him buried deep in heat, to feel every inch of him. “I need you. Please, I need you.” You whimpered against his skin, making him lift his head to look at you as you watched the chocolate brown of his eyes grow darker with lust. He worked in silence, removing his fingers as he stroked himself, making your cunt throb in anticipation as you felt the tip of his cock stroke along your entrance, a moan escaping from your parted lips as he guided himself inside you. 
“Fuck…” He whispered, pushing himself in further, inch by inch, before bottoming out, his tip bumping against your cervix. You wrapped your legs around his back, doing anything you could to bring him closer to you, trying to melt your bodies into one and hold him so tightly you could never let him float away again. You dug your nails into his muscular back as he began to thrust in and out of you, taking his time with each stroke, as if he was savoring every sweet moment. “I love you, Osita. I love you so much, baby. Gonna make you feel good, okay? I promise.” It was like you could feel his words with each stroke, the promise that had fallen from his lips burying itself deep inside you with every rock of his hips against yours. Your bedroom was filled with the sounds of your mixed moans and skin hitting against each other. Even when no words escaped from your mouths, it was almost as if you could hear each other through the sounds between the two of you, coating your walls. 
I love you. 
I need you. 
I’m so sorry. 
His palm pressed along the sheen of your skin, snaking down your body to rub against your clit, intensifying the throbbing that you already felt growing between your legs. With each thrust of his hips, his cock pounded deeper into your heat, hitting the spot within you that had the arousal beginning to pool intensely within your belly, that creeping familiar feeling building at the base of your spine. You dug your nails deeper into Javi’s skin, grasping for the damp curls at the nape of his neck, your whimpers growing louder and more desperate with each stroke as you could feel yourself beginning to crumble beneath him. 
“Javi, pleaseee. Bab-ahhhhh, I’m so close.” You felt your cunt begin to clench around his length, making him moan as each push and pull of hips became more intense, punching against your g-spot and making your writhe under his touch.
“I know you are, Hermosa. Cum for me baby, cum all over me and show me how you’re mine.” 
His words make something inside you snap, making you shake and your body tense as your arms and legs tightened their grip around Javi, crying out his name as your orgasm rushed through you. His lips met yours, swallowing your moans as his pumps became frantic and sloppy, only taking a few more before he was chasing his own high. “Fuck, baby. You’re so fucking perfect. Te amo más que a nada. Soy tyuo para siempre. (I love you more than anything, I’m yours, forever.). Fuck, I’m gonna- shit- I’m- ahhhhhhh” With one last push, you could feel him throbbing inside you, spilling against your walls, pumping every last drop of himself inside you as he slumped into your body, your hearts racing, chests rising and falling as one. The two of you laid there for a moment, your bodies tangled in each other, letting each of your breaths sync as you came down from your blissed out highs. Javi hissed as he turned over to pull out of you, making you whine at the loss, before rolling over to lay your head on his chest. You could feel his arm wrap around you to pull you in closer, his fingers tracing along your shoulder blade as you draped your arm across his stomach. 
“I guess that’s one way to make up for this shitty week.” You giggled as Javi shook his head, joining you, the both of you glad to hear the sweet sounds of each other's laughter for the first time in much too long. “Can we never do this again? I never wanna fight like that ever again. These last few days have sucked without you.” 
“Never. This was the fucking worst. Never again. I promise.” He kissed the top of your head, burying his nose in your messy curls as he held you just a little bit tighter. 
“Okay.” You smiled against his warm, tanned skin before looking up at him. “You wanna know the worst part?” 
“What, baby?” 
“I didn’t even get to eat any of that pizza.” Javi chuckled as he shook you playfully in his grasp, making you squirm and snicker as he held you. 
“There’s still some left in the fridge. Let me go get it and you can tell me all about your week, okay?” He kissed your forehead as he pushed himself out of bed, making his way to the door. 
“Okay. We’ve got a lot to catch up on, I didn’t even get to tell you how I had to call Mark’s mom in the middle of math because he stuck a crayon up his nose yesterday.” The both of you snorted as Javi looked back at you. 
“I can’t wait to hear all about it.” 
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taintedcigs · 1 year ago
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✦ SOMETHING LIKE THIS | eddie m. x reader ✦
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wc: 6.3k+
pairing: eddie munson x f!reader
warnings: nothing rlly, partying, drinking, kissing, fluffy fluff, angsty if u squint!, high mention?, drinking games!!, truth or dare bc im such a cliche <3
summary: a truth or dare game with eddie reveals some truths between the two of you.
authors note: omg i feel like i haven't posted in forever and this so LONGG and if u can guess which show i was heavily inspired by when i wrote the closet scene i will give u thousand of kisses. as usual i kinda hate this and the ending but this took forever to write and idk i just love friends to lovers eddie SOO MUCH. this is proofread but i only read it once so pls ignore any mistakes !! also if u guys enjoyed this pls LEAVE FEEDBACK, come talk to me in asks, requests r open!! ily all sm, mwah, em!
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You scoffed as you made your way past the drunken slimy bodies, pushing everyone out of the way until you finally made it into the kitchen, having no idea how Steve had managed to throw a bash this crowded and your head was spinning too much to care now.
Stumbling a bit your feet picked you up toward the drink stand, shaking the empty bottles, you sighed. "Really? All of them?" you huffed annoyed as you turned around, spotting Robin with a bottle in her hand, you smirked.
"Robin! You are my hero." You giggled as you approached her, grabbing the bottle despite her protests as you chugged a huge sip, your face contorting at the taste.
"Jesus, slow down! You're going to get black out drunk again and then complain all day tomorrow." Nancy came up behind Robin as she scoffed, this is what you had been doing all week, and Nancy was starting to get worried but you rolled your eyes at her, while Robin gave her a 'don't say that' look.
"C'mon Nance, let her be. She's got enough on her plate as it is!" Robin made a suggestive look as you took another sip, turning to face her.
Nancy pursed her lips as she shrugged. "And what does that mean?" You asked, knitting your brows together. Robin pointed towards Eddie, and your eyes followed.
He was chugging the beer he had a firm grip on, face contorting as he took more and more sips, your heart dropped to your stomach at the sight, you knew he would be here, yet you couldn't help the tingles that overtook your body when you saw him.
You were so stupid.
"I don't know what you mean." You shrugged your shoulders, lying through your teeth, Eddie had been sort of avoiding you for some time, and now, for a whole week, he was acting as if you didn't exist.
You didn't know why or how, but it was eating away at you.
Spending your days drinking and smoking away your feelings had become a regular habit ever since he had started avoiding you, and Nancy and Robin had started to get worried about your current coping mechanism.
To say you were feeling hurt would be an understatement, you and Eddie were supposed to be friends, best friends even, in the last four years, you had grown close to him, so close that being away from him even for a second hurt.
And now this distance, his cold attitude, not returning any of your calls, and eventually pretending as if you didn't exist, was eating at you, your own insecurities were bubbling up at the surface.
What was so wrong with you that Eddie couldn't even tell it to your face?
"I mean, it is weird, I've never seen the two of you apart for an hour, let alone a week." Robin spoke up, mentally cursing herself for not being able to stop blabbering and Nancy gave her a look, one that meant, 'not the fucking time' and you narrowed your eyes, hurt twinging in your chest.
"Shutting up now?" Robin asked awkwardly, shrugging her shoulders in defense, "I hope." You replied, trying to hide the hurt in your tone.
Your eyes searched for Eddie again, he was now conversing with Argyle and Jonathan, he looked uncomfortable, he could feel your gaze on him and he was doing everything in his willpower to not meet your disappointed eyes, he knew he would soften up the second he saw you.
"I think I have a plan." Nancy muttered to Robin behind you as they quickly left your side, you were too busy to notice anything as you leaned on the wall chugging the bottle again, face feeling numb.
You meant to talk to him, ask him why he was avoiding you, but you were afraid of his answer, what if Eddie didn't want to be your friend anymore?
What if Eddie was going to tell you how much he started hating you and that he never wanted to see your face again?
You would much prefer the distance rather than be shunned by him. You doubted you could handle anything without him by your side.
You knew what you felt for him was far beyond friendship now, but you never could fully admit to it.
For months, Nancy and Robin had been trying to get you to admit to it, but you had always refused, saying the two of you were 'just friends.'
But you knew, and they knew that people who were 'just friends', didn't do what you two did, friends didn't have movie nights where they ended up cuddling each other and falling asleep in each other's arms, sometimes, Eddie would even place a kiss on your forehead when you fell asleep, tucking you in as a grin took over his lips, seeing how peaceful you were.
Friends didn't have dates in Eddie's van, seated in the back as the both of you ashed a joint, wasting away the night before you watched the sunset with him, his childish grin as he told you all of his stupid jokes feeling like a kick in your stomach now.
And you knew, you knew, friends didn't look at each other the same way both of you looked at one another.
So, you were nervous, nervous that you had fucked up the only good thing in your life, nervous of what he might say to you.
But this apparent nervousness was nowhere to be seen when you had drunk this much. Before you knew it, you found your two feet dragging you to his side, unable to take control of yourself, the drunk you had decided that you had enough.
You slid past the drunk bodies standing in the way of Eddie, your fingertips anxiously fiddling with the bottle, you could barely balance yourself, smushing yourself against the wall near him.
"Hi." You intended for your voice to come out soft but your words were slurred, and Eddie almost stilled when he heard it.
His heart was thudding inside of his chest, he knew you would be at Steve's party, but he never thought you would actually talk to him, not when he had been a complete asshole to you for a while now.
His gaze was avoidant, almost as avoidant as he was and your stomach was churning again, and this time it was not the alcohol.
It was all him.
"Hey." His greeting was short, your mouth had dried up, and the drunk version of you didn't have the tolerance you had for the past week.
Your eyes narrowed as you straightened yourself. "Hey? Is that all you have to fucking say?" You almost snapped, you hadn't meant to sound so sharp, the words left your mouth like word vomit, it probably wasn't fair how you spat them at him, but his coldness to you wasn't fair, either.
You knew once you brought the subject to him there was no turning back, you were afraid of the possibility of him never talking to you again but the liquid in your system gave you enough courage to do what you feared, ripping the band-aid off, and you thought maybe, maybe, ending the friendship would cause you less pain than whatever he was supposed to be doing.
"Hello?" He attempted to joke, and if you weren't this stupidly smitten over him, and maybe a bit buzzed, it wouldn't have worked, but it did. All it took for him to soften you up was a stupid joke, causing you to giggle drunkenly, as you leaned into the wall again.
"Really?" You shook your head, "That's the best you got?" You tilted your head to the side, giving him a warm smile, you couldn't help it, it was the most you had talked with him this week, and you were already putty in his hands, you hated him, and you hated the effect he had on you.
He shrugged, it was obvious he felt more comfortable, his eyes not leaving yours. "Made you laugh, didn't I?" you nodded, you didn't mean to get this soft on him this quickly, but you couldn't help it, not when he made you feel at ease this easily.
You hated and loved how everything with Eddie made you feel at ease, feeling safe with him like you could bring your guard down for once.
You huffed, mind more mellow as you eyed him. "Missed this, ya know?" Your words were slurred again, you knew it wasn't the alcohol talking, but at the same time without it, you never would have had the courage.
Eddie's eyes were glossy and riddled with remorse as they gazed into yours, you could sense it, sense that he was feeling guilty, you bit the inside of your cheek when he looked at you like that.
"What?" He asked, dumbfounded.
"Missed this-" you pointed between the two of you, "Just missed being with y-you." You couldn't help it when your words were tangled with each other again, it made you scared to admit any of this, while Eddie just gave you a sigh.
"You're drunk?" He questioned. "Again?" If you didn't know how Eddie had been treating you the past week you'd think he was worried about you, considerate even, but the way his actions changed made you doubt his sincerity.
Eddie had been aware of your new coping mechanism, his mouth felt dry when Steve told him how badly you had been taking Eddie's new demeanor.
"Mhm." You hummed, signaling to the bottle as you attempted to chug it again but Eddie shook his head, quickly taking it away from your hands. You gasped as you straightened yourself. "Rude."
"You will get shit faced and have the worst hangover, and I'm sure you'll curse us out for letting you drink that much." He raised his brows to warn you and you pouted at him like a child.
"You sound just like Nancy." You scoffed, biting back the insult you had at the tip of your tongue about how he decided to care about you now, instead settling on making him chuckle, and just with his laugh, you felt a tinge of pride swell in your chest, it was pathetic how desperate you were for him.
"No fun, I'm crossing you out." You whined as you draw an 'X' in the air, with pouty lips and soft eyes, Eddie had a foolish grin on his face when he was comfortable with you again, almost at peace with how your soul embraced his.
He felt like an asshole, and so fucking stupid for the way he acted, but it was the only thing he knew how to do: running away from his feelings.
"Come on, where the hell have you guys been, we've got some drinking games going on!" You were startled by Robin's loud voice, and as turning to face her, you heard Eddie's groans behind you.
"No way." Eddie shook his head and you threw him a puzzled look.
"No?" You furrowed your brows. "But, you love drinking games."
"Yeah, you love drinking games. Don't be a buzzkill, Munson." Robin interrupted, she shot a look at Eddie that made him confused but intrigued, and he couldn't say no when the two of you dragged him to where everyone else was gathered.
You sat down next to him and felt your hazy drunken state get worse, it was as if everything was becoming all too real.
Realizing that the conversation you just had with him meant nothing, not after he had been avoiding you for a week, and now your mind was swirled with the thoughts of what was going to happen when you two finally had 'the talk', anxiety riddling over your body again.
"What game are we playing?" You asked in an attempt to shake off your thoughts, it didn't help when Eddie's gaze landed on you and you could feel your cheeks burning with his gaze alone, causing you to chew on your bottom lip out of nervousness.
"We just played endless rounds of 'Never Have I Ever'" Nancy sighed, almost annoyed.
"Turns out Steve the King is bit of a slut." Robin semi-whispered as Steve gasped, holding his heart to be dramatic.
"Really, Robin?" He furrowed his brows. "Well, it's not my fault you hooked up with the half of—" Robin was interrupted by Eddie's groan.
"C'mon you guys let's just play whatever this is and get on with it." His voice sounded annoyed, you turned to face him, but Eddie was already avoiding your gaze again, he looked nervous, and you wanted to roll your eyes, he was being an asshole, again.
You could feel anger bubbling up inside of your chest, and Robin could feel the tension in the air. "Okayy, truth or dare it is!" Robin interrupted with a nervous giggle.
"I thought we were playing Never Have I Ever-" You were shut up by Robin's shushes.
"Yes and now we switched to Truth or Dare, keep up, sweetheart." You furrowed your brows and giggled, turning to Steve as if to ask what was wrong with Robin, but Steve put his hands up in defense, shrugging.
Something weird was going on and you couldn't put a finger on it, and to be honest, your mind was too fuzzy to figure any of it out, filled both with alcohol and the thoughts of Eddie. Robin grabbed the bottle and spun it around the circle, the anticipation of it made her fiddle in her place, and when it landed on Steve, she groaned.
"Steve! I think you should pick truth, are you a virgin? Oh wait, you are not! Let me spin it again." Robin talked so fast that even Eddie threw her a look, you were usually used to her fast-paced actions but she was giving you a whiplash now.
"Robin, what the hell are you—" Eddie's words were cut short by Robin's shriek.
"Wow! It landed on Eddie, what a surprise." Robin rubbed her hands together almost like a villain in a cartoon.
"So, truth or dare, Eddie? Oh, also you can't say truth because Steve just picked that." Robin hit her hand against her forehead in a fake manner, and you giggled again at her actions, unaware of what was coming next.
"Okaa...ay, dare?" Eddie asked unsurely, and Robin mimicked a thinking face, you had no idea what was coming next, but you doubted anything Robin would dare him to do could fix whatever was going on with Eddie.
"I dare you to..." She paused for a minute.
"Go into that closet and not come out until you and Y/N make out." Robin's words were like a slap on your face, and she had that stupid grin on her face that you wanted to wipe off.
"Excuse me?" The two of you said in unison and you were afraid to look at him now.
"I mean... a dare is a dare." Steve shrugged, and Robin nodded quickly causing you to sigh.
"You are a child, Robin." You threw her a death stare, your mind was still hazy as you began to get up, and Eddie was still where he was sitting, he twisted his rings, an action you knew he did when he was nervous.
"Well, are you just going to wait around all day?" You snapped, not knowing what came over you when you were this drunk.
"You're okay with this?" Eddie's face was almost red as he looked up at you, hating the way a nervous tingle formed in your stomach with how he looked at you.
"It's just a d—dare, let's get it over with." You meant to sound confident but your words came out as a murmur.
"This is so stupid." He scoffed as he followed you into the closet, Robin following up behind the two of you. She locked the door when the two of you entered and she sent you a smirk before she did so, making you scoff.
"I swear I'm going to kill her." You said sharply, turning your back on the door.
When you finally faced Eddie you realized how close he was standing to your face, his tall figure towering over you was enough to make your breath hitch.
"Hi." was all he muttered as he looked down on you, making you realize how much you missed the warmth of his soft gaze and you hated yourself for how enamored you were with him.
"Hi." You managed to let out when you caught your breath, the room felt suffocating, and you could barely swallow the lump in your throat.
The possibility of him kissing you made you want to scream, both from excitement and fear.
"So... we have to kiss?" He said awkwardly, scratching his head, almost as if it were a question and you nodded quickly, knowing he was too nervous to make the first move so you had to take matters into your own hands.
"What's the big deal? It's just a kiss. We've been best friends for years, we can do it." You said, with a nonchalant tone, but the hint of nervousness was still visible.
"Let's just do it!" You announced excitedly, "kiss me, Edward Munson!" Eddie chuckled at that, making you realize how much you had missed that genuine laugh.
"Edward..." He tilted his head, "Really?" He raised a brow, causing you to pout.
"Yeah." You giggled softly, offering him a smile, knowing how much he hated someone saying his full name, he gave you a light chuckle.
“Okay, yeah, I think I deserved that." He attempted to joke, the air still tense but filled with your giggles.
"Let's do this...” Eddie added cooly, his hands at his side as he leaned towards you, licking his lips.
“Why are you licking your lips?” You questioned, making Eddie chuckle, as he stopped leaning in further.
"Should I not?" He raised a brow, "I mean do you want dry lips?” He asked sarcastically and you shook your head chuckling.
"No, no!" You protested, face burning from embarrassment. "Never mind..." You chuckled.
“I didn’t think it was—” Eddie started but you interrupted, “No.. no it’s okay.. I just..” You were a stuttering mess now.
"Let’s do it.. I—I’m ready.” His tone was soft when he spoke, he was less nervous and you nodded frantically.
You started leaning in but then abruptly stopped, making Eddie furrow his brows.
“Do you want tongue? Are you like a tonguer?” You asked, your face was serious and Eddie's eyes widened.
“Am I a what?” Eddie asked baffled as you chuckled, shaking your head.
"Fuck..." You cursed, giggles errupting in your throat from nervousness. "I didn't mean it like that, I just meant—" You were babbling, your heart hammering inside of your chest.
"I mean do you like tongue in kissing? I just— I wouldn’t wanna use tongue if you don’t want to..." You trailed off.
“Let’s just do it!” Eddie exclaimed interrupting as you let out another giggle, your nerves were getting the best of you.
“Yes, sorry. Are you ready?” You asked, weight of anticipation settling heavily in your chest as Eddie nodded, “Yes.. I’m ready.. let’s just do this..” Eddie let out slowly, scratching his head from nervousness as you nodded once again.
You barely moved when he leaned towards you, almost frozen in place you stared at him, stared at the sickly sweet brown of his eyes, stared at his dark hair that messily laid on his forehead, and you couldn't help it when your eyes lowered down to gaze at his lips, adoring the curve of his mouth.
Your gaze was stuck on him in a way that made your eyes glimmer with an array of emotions, not knowing if this would be your first and last kiss with him, trying your best to etch this sight of him into your mind forever, unsure of whether you could ever see him up this close again.
and as if Eddie could read your mind, he realized, he realized the weight of how you were staring at him. With more he studied your face, the connection between the two of you deepened, unraveling what he most wanted. You.
“Fuck— You.. you can’t do that!” He exclaimed, desperately, and you knitted your brows in confusion, “What... what did I do?” Eddie was being ridiculous now.
"Jesus Christ, you can't just do that to me." His face was burning up, he thought maybe, that this dare would be good for him, maybe the best way to get over his feelings was to kiss you for once, but the way your eyes glimmered was enough to make him want to stare at you forever, and he couldn't do that when he was trying to keep his feelings for you bottled up, forever.
Now, he was regretting the dare as he could feel the pressure building and you looked so pretty that Eddie felt his heart sink in his body, if he kissed you, he knew he couldn't contain his feelings for you no longer, he sighed, shaking his head.
“You can't do that thing with your eyes and face!” He exclaimed as you scoffed, “What the hell are you talking about?” You almost yelled, getting frustrated by his stand-offish attitude.
“Okay that’s it.. I— I can’t do it!” He huffed as he reached for the doorknob, struggling with it.
“Let me out guys!” Eddie yelled but Robin just chuckled, “You have to kiss her, you idiot!”
“Let me out of here, Robin!” He yelled louder this time, but instead of Robin answering this time Steve, Nancy, Argyle, Jonathan, and the gathered crowd answered to him, chanting “Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!” and Eddie rolled his eyes, cursing.
“Oh come on Eddie, let’s just do this! Just one kiss!” You said annoyed, and you felt a bit rejected at how much he wanted to leave.
Eddie turned around to meet your gaze, “No, I’m not gonna fucking kiss you.” His words were bitter and you bit the inside of your cheek to keep yourself from crying in front of him.
“Eddie we've been best friends for four years! A little kiss isn’t gonna change anything.” The words that left your mouth stung him, it wasn't easy on you but the emphasis on the two of you being best friends and how a kiss wouldn't change a thing between the two of you was the exact reason he was avoiding you.
Eddie knew if you had rejected him, and told him that you didn't reciprocate his feelings, it would eventually lead to the two of you not being friends.
And he couldn't handle that idea, he couldn't handle not being around you. That's why he tried to stay away from you, just so he could contain his feelings for you, at least for a while.
His gaze on you was agonizing, “Stop looking at me like that.” He muttered as you rolled your eyes, and crossed your arms around your chest, annoyed.
“God, will you just kiss me already!” You blurted out, now getting annoyed with him, not being able to comprehend why Eddie was making such a big deal out of this when it was just supposed to be a dare.
"No."
“Why not?” You questioned, eager to know why he had been acting this way, Eddie ran his hands across his hair, ruffling it before he gripped your shoulders to get your attention fully, “Because..." He took a deep breath as he put his trembling hands into his back pockets, he was trying to hold himself back, but he couldn't, not when you looked at him that way.
"Because I don't want to kiss you like this!” He almost snapped, his feelings taking over before his logic could, and you went rigid with his words.
His own reaction was delayed as his eyes widened at his own words, and he was standing close to you, so close, that your breath hitched when he said that. “What.. what does that mean?”  Your head was spinning as Eddie looked down, almost as if he was embarrassed.
“Nothing! I didn’t— I just... That’s not what I fucking meant..” Eddie stuttered over his words, he felt like his desperation had trickled into the very air he was breathing in, his own words suffocating him and your gaze mocking him, he couldn't handle it further as people outside the closet started chanting “Kiss! Kiss!” again.
Eddie scoffed again, “Shit— just, excuse me..” He cursed out as he tried the doorknob again.
“What are you doing?” You asked curiously, you wanted to talk to him now.
“Just need some air” He murmured and tried the door again.
“Robin, just open up!” Eddie yelled out making Robin groan, “Did you kiss her?” Eddie rolled his eyes, and he got ready to curse Robin out but you placed your hands over his mouth, shushing him.
“Yes, yes Robin! We fucking did, we even french kissed! You happy?” You yelled out as Robin giddily chuckled unlocking the door.
You threw her a dead stare as Eddie just brushed past her, hurrying his way out and you followed quickly behind him.
"Eddie, just wait!" You called out after him, you were curious to know what he meant, why he was acting this way, none of it was making sense to you and you were still very buzzed.
"Just leave me the fuck alone, Y/N." He didn't even turn around to face you and it hurt.
"No! I'm not going to fucking run away this time." You yelled, catching up to him, and Eddie turned around swiftly.
"What are you talking about?" He asked, his tone curious and not annoyed like before.
"I'm not playing your stupid game anymore, I don't care if you tell me you hate me, Eddie, just tell me what's wrong, tell me what I did to make you push me away this much. You can insult me and tell me to 'fucking leave' but I won't leave until you tell me to my face what I did to make you push me away, you fucking coward!" You spat out the words, rolling your shoulders as you felt your anger coming out to the surface.
Eddie rubbed his hands against his face, you were asking for him to be vulnerable, and he knew that if he opened up to you, you would probably laugh in his face.
"I just—" He scoffed, "I don't wanna do this. Not right now." He sighed, and he drooped his head, his gaze fixated on the ground now.
"Just tell me what the fuck is wrong, Eddie." You almost yelled, feeling your face hot with anger. "What did you mean by when you said you didn't want to kiss me like this?"
"And why have you been avoiding me, why can't you even look me in the fucking eye right now?" To say you were frustrated would be an understatement, liquid courage had worked a little too well and you were pouring your gut out to him.
You crossed your arms against your chest, feeling your cheeks burning up with anger, you were filled with fury, and nothing Eddie could do was going to change that.
In fact, it made it worse when he kept avoiding his gaze. "Fuck you." You spat out, index finger pointed towards him, hostility written all over your face, your feet picked you up before your mind realized, and you brushed past him as you angrily left his side.
"Just— fucking wait!" His words rang in your ears but you didn't care, you kept walking while Eddie was right behind you.
"Let me just explain!" He yelled out after you. "Jesus— you're fucking fast." He added as he tried to catch up to you.
You stopped in your tracks, and your back was turned to him. "Eddie, just get it over with." You crossed your arms against your chest again, feeling your insides twist as you waited for him to pull the band-aid off.
"What?" He raised his brows in confusion, and you didn't dare to look at him.
"You realized it, didn't you? I mean it took me a while to realize it myself." Your voice was timid, not trusting yourself enough that you wouldn't break down completely in front of him.
"And you realized you didn't reciprocate them, and you're trying to let me off easy by avoiding me." You could feel tears prickling your eyes but you shook your head to make them go away.
"I know you hate confrontation." Your voice was cracking now, and Eddie hated it, he hated being the reason you were about to cry, he hated being the reason you doubted yourself because of him.
"What are you talking about? Reciprocating what?" He didn't dare to turn you to face him, he was still shocked at the possibility of what you were hinting at.
"Feelings, Eddie. My fucking feelings for you!" You turned around to face him now, and his eyes had softened, he blinked slowly to process what you were saying. The air between the two of you was filled with unspoken emotions, your body ridden with anticipation and anxiety.
But Eddie felt stupid, so fucking stupid. He spent this whole week bottling up his feelings for you, and avoiding you to do so because he thought he wasn't good enough for you, he thought you would actually mock him.
He should've known you would never do that, he should've told the insecure voice in his head to shut the fuck up.
Because there you were in front of him, saying exactly what he was feeling, and he felt like the biggest idiot in the world.
"Your... what?" His eyebrows furrowed, and he wanted to laugh, he wanted to laugh at how stupid he was being.
"Just— let's just pretend this never happened." You could barely look at him, nervously fiddling with your fingers.
"Nope." He shook his head.
There was no fucking way he would pretend this had never happened, he had been waiting, for years to tell you how he felt, every night he would give himself a pep talk, encouraging himself to finally open up to you, but when he finally saw you in the morning, and you gave him that warm smile and those doe-eyes, he always backed out, scared of losing you forever.
"No fucking way." He shook his head, and a chuckle escaped his lips.
The look you threw him was filled with disdain, "Oh, so this is funny to you?" You were quick to judge him, turning around and muttering curse words as your feet began to pick up again.
"Jesus Christ, will you let me speak!" He yelled out again and you shook your head, walking faster. Eddie scoffed, "So. Fucking. Stubborn." He muttered under his breath.
He caught up to you once again and this time he reached out to your free hand, and he grabbed it in a tight firm, spinning you around to face him, you were about to cuss him out again, and throw him a death glare, but his gaze was so gentle that you couldn't help it, your eyes were mellow, sickly sweet, as they met his.
Your heart reacted before you could, thumping in your chest. Eddie was leaning so close towards you that you sensed his heavy breathing against your face, you didn't dare to move, not until his tender fingertips brushed against your cheeks, he leaned over so agonizingly slow that you couldn't help but close the gap between the two of you, soft lips clashing with each other as you whimpered the second your mouth met his.
Eddie's chest fizzled with warmness, the smell of your perfume mixed with alcohol dizzying him while your head was still pounding as you were trying to process what was happening, there wasn't enough air in the world for your lungs to pull in.
You deepened the kiss when Eddie's hands slowly cupped your cheeks, parting your lips as his tongue explored yours, shuddering at his touch.
Your brain didn't process any of it, not until the initial shock wore off, that's when you pulled back slightly, catching your breath as you blinked confusedly at him, unable to find the words to speak.
Eddie licked his lips as they twitched to form a smile, speaking up before you could. “In the closet.. when. I said I didn’t wanna kiss you like that... I meant that I wanted something like this..”  He gave you a slight chuckle as you returned it with a warm smile.
"I'm sorry for the way I acted." He gulped, feeling guilty for his actions in the past weeks, but he always poorly reacted to things that involved his feelings.
"I thought if I just stayed away from you, if I just pushed you away for a while, I could bottle up my feelings for you and—"
"You have feelings for me?" You asked, interrupting, eyes widening despite the kiss being undeniable proof of that but you still couldn't believe it, you still couldn't believe that the man you had been in love with was actually reciprocating the feelings you harbored, the feelings you tried so hard to contain inside of you.
"Are you kidding? Of course, I do." Eddie affirmed. "I mean how could I not?" He chuckled, pointing towards you. "Jesus, you're so beautiful, so fucking pretty..." he flashed you a mischievous smile.
"You're nice, and god, so fucking kind that it makes me sick sometimes. And shit— you get along with Wayne so well, I think he thinks of you more as his kid than me at this point." You gave him a light chuckle.
"Also... you are funny sometimes too." He added, giving you a light nudge with his shoulder as you pointed towards yourself mouthing 'Little old me?' sarcastically, making him smile.
"Fuck— if it wasn't for you, I'd be so lost, sweetheart. I'm so glad you came into my life." Your heart warmed at his words, gaze softening as your lips twitched into a smile.
"And you're always fucking there for me... even when I don't deserve it." He nervously fiddled with his fingers, he didn't deserve someone as perfect as you.
"Like right now, even though I've been an asshole, avoiding you, and even more of an asshole in the closet, you still came after me." He looked down, embarrassed that he had pushed you away, he knew you deserved better, so much better.
"You didn't deserve any of it, you just deserve every fucking good thing there is, and I'm just none of those things." You shook your head, opening your mouth to speak but Eddie didn't let you.
"Can you even picture it? You and me together? You— god, you are so fucking perfect." Your heart pounded against your chest, the rhythm of it erratic and suffocating because of his painful words, if only he knew how much you loved him.
"I'm just me, Eddie. I'm fucked up, a 'freak', a fucking drug dealer." Deep lines etched his forehead, he chuckled bitterly, and your heart throbbed at him describing himself as anything but good.
"I guess I just decided I wasn't good enough for you. Fuck— I chickened out." He eyed you nervously, and what he didn't expect was you slapping him on the shoulder, harshly.
"Ow!" He yelped, "Eddie never, ever make decisions on my part ever again." You chided him and he nodded quickly, "Jesus, that hurt."
"Good, because I also don't allow you to speak that way about yourself either, you're the best thing that has ever happened to me Eddie and I mean it. You're not fucked up." You affirmed him.
"God, you really are the best thing that has ever happened to me, Eddie. I don't think I've ever been happier, or more comfortable with anyone but you, you helped me realize so much about myself and have been there with me through everything." You didn't blink once, and Eddie's mouth was agape, he couldn't believe that someone —and not just anyone, you— saw him as anything more than a fuck up.
"I love you, Eddie, and I mean it, I love you so fucking much." You added, your eyes glimmering. "I can't stop thinking about you, ever... and it physically hurt being away from you for just one fucking week."
"I'm sorry for that..." He muttered again, embarrassed. "I love you so fucking much, honey. And I promise I'll never do something as dumb as this again." He gave you a warm smile, and his fingertips were gentle as they grazed over your cheeks.
You tilted your head in hesitation, "Yeah, I doubt it." You giggled, and Eddie squished your cheeks in response.
"God, you're so lucky that you're so pretty and so lucky that I fucked up big time because I will agree with you on whatever you say for the next few days." Eddie's lips formed a smirk and you raised a brow, "I'm thinking for the next month." You pursed your lips sarcastically.
Eddie chuckled and leaned in once again to kiss you, "Whatever my pretty girl wants." He murmured into your lips.
You whimpered again when your lips touched, both of you groaned when you were interrupted by Nancy's voice.
"See, I told you it would work!" Nancy pointed towards to two of you kissing as Robin and Steve almost gasped.
Robin turned to Nancy crossing her arms against her chest all-knowingly, "Yeah but it wasn't working a minute ago when they were yelling at each oth-" Robin's words were cut short by the glare Eddie and you threw at Robin.
"Sorry!" She yelled out, giving a sheepish smile, making you laugh.
"So, this was all you?" You asked, pointing towards Nancy, but before she could answer Robin scoffed.
"As if I didn't put your stubborn asses in that closet!" She mocked. The puzzle pieces of Robin acting weird all night coming to you and Eddie at the same time.
"You guys are all idiots." Eddie huffed, but his smile never faltered, and the three of them knew that was his way of gratitude.
You turned towards them with a sheepish smile on your face mouthing a 'thank you' to Robin and Nancy, and giving Steve a thumbs up, they waved you off as if to say 'No problem', and you turned to Eddie again.
"Eventful night, huh?" He asked, a smirk playing on his lips, and you gave him a playful nudge. "Shut up."
"So... you ready to go home?" Eddie asked as he threw an arm around your shoulder, you nodded, melting into his comfortable hold.
"Mhmm." You hummed, as he pressed a kiss on your hair. "I love you, pretty girl." He murmured.
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rowretro · 5 months ago
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𝕭𝖚𝖙𝖙𝖊𝖗𝖋𝖑𝖞 𝕶𝖎𝖘𝖘𝖊𝖘
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✧warnings: Yandere/toxic themes, kidnapping, explicit stuff mentioned (this isnt my best writting im so sorry its been saur long, im working thru the reqs too<3 my drafts are filled w sm so stay tuned!!!)
❁synopsis: Sunghoon is feared by all, his name was enough to reinforce that fear, for he had grown to be a much more fearful mafia than his father, though one with morals, he never let women in his life, and he barely trusted anyone... until he saw a butterfly.
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Sunghoon stepped out of his limo, suitcase loaded with cash. He was filthy rich, and he couldn't deny it, so seeing him give a suitcase of month everytime the orphanage needed money, he was happy to help. His face always had a cold look, but the children all loved him, they were only safe, and loved in a caring foster home just because of him.
The man got into his vehcile, sitting in the driver's seat as Jungwon stared at him. "I still dont understand why you don't hire a driver for yourself bro-" Jungwon simply asked as Sunghoon raised an eyebrow "The rest of you boys cant be trusted driving under stressful situations so you have one, I just dont need one." he simply said as he started his car. The man started driving, when his car came to a sudden halt.
There before him, a pretty girl "Bro- u almost hit that hottie-" Jungwon pointed out as Sunhgoon didnt even bother turning his way, his eyes glued on the girl who apologized, before gettign distracted again, chasing after the blue morpho butterfly. "Crazy bitch- fuck she scared me-" Jungwon mumbled as Sunghoon continued staring at the girl, lovestruck, the way she raised her hand, and let the butterfly sit on her finger, as she kissed near it.
"Jungwon. I want to know every little detail about that girl. where she studies, where she lives, what she likes, what she hates, everything." He stated as Jungwon frowned, yet complied. She was very pretty, her layered dark hair, her perfectly winged eyeliner, the way she walked freely like she didn't give a care in the world. Not to mention, she definitely had style. For the first time he fell in love. So he will have her fall for him.
It didn't take Jungwon too long, as soon as he got home, he printed out the necessary files "Her name is y/n, she lives with the Lee's, yes She's Lee Heeseung's sister. Her father owns many schools, and she studies in the one Heeseung teaches in, to be fair, you're going to have to get on Heeseung's good side if you want her, because they're looking to arrange a marriage for her." Jungwon concluded as Sunghoon smiled.
It was all so easy for him. She was just within reach. "What brings you here Sunghoon?" Heeseung asked as the male looked around the School grounds. "Oh? well uhm.... uhh... just looking for a potential threat in this college- He's hiding from me..." he lied as Heeseung nodded. "In that case keep an eye on my sister-" Heeseung replied as he pat his shoulder, and walked off to a group of loud students.
His eyes finally found her, a butterfly sitting on her cheek, and she didn't even flinch, still writting notes in her book. He took a seat in front of her, causing the butterfly to fly away. The girl looked up, tilting her head at him. "Mr Park! what brings you here.... you aren't going to kill me are you?..." She asked as Sunghoon snickerred "Of course not.... what could possibly lead me to hurting a sweetheart like you?" He asked, his hand softly holding her jaw, as he ran his thumb across her lips and cheek.
It's no surprise she knew who he was, he was the Park Sunghoon, everyone knows him. God her lips are so perfect, he was so soft, making sure not to smudge her makeup or hurt her. However y/n felt a little uncomfortable... She softly pulled away. She can't deny it, he's fucking gorgeous, fighting her intrusive thoughts of rubbing her thumb across his brows.
"I wanted to see how my pretty girl is doing. My pretty girl..." he smiled, as he placed a strand of her hair behind her ear. "Im installing a butterfly greenhouse in my garden just for you, Heeseung said you love flowers, I have a whole garden filled with jasmines, roses, lotuses and many other flowers you name it..." Sunghoon continued. It was all moving so fast, was this her fiancee her parents picked for her? why's he moving so fast? why him? is this a trap to kill her?
It was none of which... The Lee father fears Sunghoon, and Heeseung is like a brother to Sunghoon, after all the man did abuse Heeseung and y/n growing up, so when Sunghoon asked to marry her, Of course her parents wer happy with it, Mrs Lee believed he was a sweetheart. Heeseung wasn't too happy at first, but he wasn't a typical mafia boss, playboy with prostitutes every night, how bad could it possibly be.
"Uhm..... huh?" Y/n asked, not knowing what to say or ask. "You're parents are ok with me marrying you so, instead of circling around, im giving it to you straight." Sunghoon simply said "All you need to do is pack your belongings when you get home, you're moving in with me, your room will be right opposite mine, and we can talk about what you want in this marriage ok?" He asked as Y/n stared, stunned.
She was never told anything.... Why is everything going so fast? She was being married off to a blood thirsty beastly man who kills for a living?! As Sunghoon left, she sat there lost in thought. So she really was his?.......
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purinfelix · 5 months ago
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could you please write something where trent pining for his bestfriend for a long time before he finally confesses to her that he has feelings?? thank you! i love your writing sm <3
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something stupid ₊˚⊹
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pairing: Trent Alexander Arnold x reader summary: Trent’s never been the best at concealing his jealousy, especially not when it comes to you - even if the two of you are ‘just friends’ warnings: none w/c: 1k
a/n: had to combine these two because they gave me the best idea everrr ... anyways i missed writing for trent like i realised i don't acc write for him that much - soo pls send more trent reqss!! <33
♬ and then I go and spoil it all by saying something stupid like "I love you" ♬
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Trent couldn’t decide what feeling was worse - the intense, almost burning jealousy ripping through him as he watched you from across the bar, or the even more intense guilt consuming him for even daring to feel that way. To feel such an all-consuming possessiveness over someone who wasn’t even his, and to be left with no option other than to loiter in the corner like some idiot, his grip on his drink growing tighter by the second.
You wouldn’t blame him, surely, you couldn’t. With the way you looked tonight, and the fact that you had personally invited him out with you - albeit with a couple mutual friends - but none of them mattered, at least not to him. It also didn’t help that you had spent the last couple of years, ever since meeting through a group project in some long-forgotten university class, dragging him through some sick cat-and-mouse game. Always toeing the line between being just close friends, or something vaguely more, and Trent hated himself for just going along with it, but he’d by lying if he said he didn’t enjoy how weak he was to your charms.
But as he watched you, his breath heavy and heart beating steadily, he couldn’t help but question whether you had meant to do any of it at all. He watched you throw your head back in laughter and hot jealousy pulsed through him once more, yearning for nothing more than to be the one making you laugh instead of whatever other guy you were lending your attention to. Still, you looked so happy, so at peace, he couldn’t help but curse himself for even considering the possibility that you were purposely making him pine after you. After all, it was his fault - he had still yet to muster up the courage to ask you out on a date, even after being stupidly enamoured with everything about you since the day he met you. It was probably more rational to consider that he had just misread most of your actions beyond the friendly gestures they were supposed to be.
Suddenly, his attention was turned to the steady arm of another one of your male friends snaking around your waist, which Trent had been dragging his gaze along excruciatingly slowly - but now his focus was turned to the fact that this asshole was pulling you closer to himself, and further away from Trent.
Fuck rationality.
The thud of his glass was definite, followed quickly by his heavy footsteps as Trent shoved past the small group you had amassed, not bothering to make his actions subtle. It was clear to everyone, including himself, that Trent was moving faster than his rational thoughts could form, but that didn’t seem to matter when his hand was already wrapped tightly around your wrist, dragging you in the direction of the bar’s exit. You protested, struggling against his grip, but all it took was one look from him as he turned back to you - equal parts pained and pleading - for you to go with him.
The biting cold of the late night hit you the minute you stepped out of the bar, causing you to stop straight in your tracks and huff with frustration.
“Trent, what the hell is going on with you?” your tone was demanding, not making any effort to conceal your annoyance with him.
“I wasn’t going to stand by and watch that filth lay his hands all over you,” he retorts, and if you didn’t know any better you’d think he was equally annoyed with you. But from the way he can’t stand still and his eyes are scanning the pavement, avoiding yours, you know there’s something else at play here.
“Bullshit.”
“Wh- I can’t do something nice for you?”
“Giving me a life, paying for dinner, those are nice things - not snatching me away when I was in the middle of a conversation? Why do you care if some guy touches me?”
“Why do I care?” he scoffs, almost as if he doesn’t believe you haven’t realised why yet, “Because I’m in love with you! You’ve invited my out tonight, and you seem to be having the time of your life, but when I saw you with that guy, him making you laugh, touching you, all I could think about was how much I wanted it to be me instead. How much I’ve always wanted it to be me.”
A silence falls over you two, and it’s only now that the weight of Trent’s actions have hit him, as well as the realisation that he can’t do anything to take back his words now, or stop whatever reaction you’re about to give him. He makes his regret obvious almost immediately, his flustered expression dropping as he looks down to the ground once more, unable to bring himself to look at you. His confession hangs in the air, having changed both everything and nothing at once.
You stood there, slack-jawed, mind racing yet absolutely speechless. You’d be lying if you hadn’t at least suspected Trent of having feelings for you, but you had brushed any inkling you had off as your own misinterpretation. Hearing him say it out loud was another thing entirely, and it was overwhelming your every sense, but in a good way.
The silence became too much to bear, and Trent figured he’d have to be the one to brave it, “Say something, please,” he mumbles, voice heavy, almost preparing himself for rejection.
“Trent…” you begin, stepping slightly closer and reaching out to take his hand in yours, “I’ve wanted it to be you too.”
At this, he looks up at you, eyes glistening. “Really?” the disbelief in his voice almost breaks your heart.
“Yeah,” you say, almost laughing at how ridiculous this is, “for a while, actually.”
“God, you don’t know how long I’ve been waiting to hear that,” he lets out an almost comical sigh of relief, finally breaking into a smile, and you can’t help but do the same.
“Now, I’d like to get back to my drink, if you don’t mind,” you say, but he doesn’t let go of your hand.
“Why would I mind?” he laughs, and you could slap him right there and then, but you can only smile in faux-annoyance as the two of you walk back to the bar, hand-in-hand.
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getsteddiewithit · 6 months ago
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Two People
——
just thinking about how steve and eddie would be the same people- just on opposite sides of the spectrum.
eddie would be so pale year-round, including during the summer on beach trips. he did not like exercising or being outside. and when he would join steve with being outside, he would be burnt to a crisp.
steve would be gorgeously tan, playing in the waves and the sand like a toddler. out there every day until the day they had to leave. he’s incredibly athletic and loves to move around. he would force eddie to go outside with him and he would be stuck applying aloe all over eddie’s back, but he wouldnt mind.
eddie likes his coffee ridiculously sweet- extra cream, flavoring, and sugar every time.
steve likes americanos- which eddie thinks is fucking disgusting.
but they both like an extra shot of espresso.
steve’s hair grows incredibly fast. one year in middle school, he went a whole summer without cutting it; his hair long and straight. he cut it off and has kept it short-ish since.
eddie’s hair grows slow. it’s untamed and curly and he will never, ever cut it. steve doesn’t want him to.
eddie is very sensitive and gets mad or frustrated easily, and it’s easy to get him worked up.
steve is cool and calm under any pressure, and it’s hard to make him mad. but he’s great at reading people, and knows how to calm eddie down quick.
eddie is loaded with piercings and tattoos and is completely fine with needles.
steve hates needles and will never get pierced or tattooed- with the exception of getting a matching tattoo with eddie in the future. eddie will have to hold his hand the entire time.
eddie is amused very easily, and steve does the joking and messing around.
steve’s body is covered in freckles and moles; it reminds eddie of constellations.
eddie’s skin would be completely bare if it weren’t for the multiple tattoos he has.
eddie loves rainy days and storms.
steve is afraid of thunder and loves the sun.
steve kills the bugs when they find some.
eddie is the one jumping to get away from them.
eddie is cold easily, steve is hot easily. they keep the thermostat at 67, no matter what. and both of them will get mad if the other decides to change it without talking about it first. (yes, they do have a whole discussion before changing the thermostat.)
eddie loves to bake.
steve loves to cook. (yes, there is a big difference.)
despite his appearance, eddie is not a big fan of horror movies.
steve is a huge horror movie buff.
these two- no matter how long they’ve been dating- can NOT take a shower together because eddie likes it burning hot and steve has to keep it cool.
these are all i have. i love them sm. thank you for reading. :)
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dizzycoffee · 9 months ago
Note
Oh my gosh I love your writing!!! After reading the Vox x Angel Reader I was just "Wow so cute!"
And then I got this idea from it
What if Vox just can't do anything anymore or just say a simple "No" to (Female Angel)Reader without them using there puppy eyes on him ALL of the time even at times they don't do it intentionally
Like we just act a cute puppy once we are getting yelled at we just give our owners a sad puppy eye look and make them do what we want XDD
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— Vox / Angel!Fem!Reader; Headcanons Part 2
KSGDHG thank you sm !!! this dynamic is honestly so much fun to write !
for the first post, click here !
*・゜゚・*:.。..。.:*・ HEADCANONS ・*:.。..。.:*・゜゚・*
While Vox is still a bit hesitant to put a label in the relationship, the two of you definitely act like you're in a romantic one
A committed one at that, seeing as how you made it very clear you have no interest in anyone but him
He, on the other hand, makes it clear by the way he never refuses your requests
Usually, he's quite compliant when it comes to you asking for physical things
If you asked for anything, he'll gladly fulfill your needs
You're thirsty? Here's a water. You're cold? He's brought a blanket with him. You're tired? Please, lie down and he'll turn the lights down to make it easier to rest
There are two main instances in which hesitates with your requests...
Vox pulled the blanket over you, smiling to himself as he watched you yawn. "Go ahead and sleep, angel," he whispered. As he began to move away, your hand reached for his. Your touch left him buffering for a second, turning his head to look over at your pleading look. Despite the now darkened room, your eyes still shined amidst the darkness. "Can you stay with me?" you asked in a soft tone. Swallowing thickly, Vox felt himself hesitate for a moment. He obliged, slithering into bed next to you. Naturally, your wings wrapped themselves around him.
When in comes to more emotional / intimate requests, he finds himself a bit reluctant
Not because he doesn't want to— no no, he LOVES to cuddle you and all
It sort of comes back to his inferiority complex and how he doesn't want to end up corrupting you
He loves you, so much he's scared to hurt you in any way
He can't unsee how your hands feel so soft against his claws, the way your angelic wings warm his cold and stiff body
He feels he isn't meant to be loved by an angel like you...
You, on the other hand, don't particularly care whether he's an overlord, a demon, etc.
You don't necessarily hate his hesitance, because you understand that he's still struggling to come to terms that this whole relationship is okay
But you don't fully tolerate it, especially when all you want to do is kiss him
You developed this specific habit for him whenever he starts to hesitate or begin to think negatively
Vox cleared his throat, "You want... more kisses?" You held back a sigh, understanding that he was beginning to overthink things. You looked up at him, letting your eyes widen as your brows twitched into an expression that left him flustered. You pout your lips as you say, "Please, Voxy? For me?" It didn't take more than a second for his lips to be attached onto yours.
Emotional intimacy aside, he also hesitates to fulfill your requests whenever you visit while he works
The way he hardly gets any work done whenever you visit during work hours,,,
A soft hum left his lips as he kissed you, his claws gently caressing your cheek. He couldn't get over this overwhelming warm feeling you gave him. Your hands gently tugged at his shoulders as you peppered his lips with your kisses, his own hands running down to your hips to pull you further into his lap. "Vox?! We have a meeting!" The two of you jump, eyes flashing towards the locked door of Vox's office. "Fucking Val..." Vox mumbled before turning to you. "Sorry, angel. We'll have to cut the visit sho—" "But you promised we'd be together all day..." Like a switch, your previously flustered expression flipped to give him the puppy-eyes. He inhaled sharply, claws beginning to dig into your side. "I'm busy!" Vox yelled back out to Valentino. Ignoring the groans and complaints from behind the door, the two of you returned to your longing kisses.
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thetorturedbuckydepartment · 3 months ago
Text
chapter three: the truce
pairing: Bucky barnes x plus-sized!SHIElD!reader
masterlist
summary: being a SHIELD agent, you have a knack for analysing people, particularly when it comes to attraction. you have everyone figured out, sorted away into the boxes you've created. But there's one man you can never seem to figure out, the very bane of your existence -- Bucky Barnes. On the field, he is a saint, helping you dodge bullets and taking knife wounds in your name. Around the building? Public menace number one, always poised to insult or to spar with you.
After being sent on a 6-month-long torture-cum-vacation with the very man, could all this change? Could you finally figure out what has been bubbling beneath the surface for years between the two of you, the juggernaut that you know you cannot stop?
warnings:  language, mention of being fostered and it being terrible, more hints to reader’s past, dead mother, mentions of sex and reader being dom
word count: 2.7k
taglist: @cjand10 @mcira @calwitch
PREVIOUS PART
A/N: I enjoyed writing this sm! as always, please let me know what you think, all comments and reblogs and likes are heavily appreciated!! love u all <3
You didn’t expect moving to be so much work, and…so much fucking tape. Ever since you escaped the hellhole of your foster house, you’ve been living in the Tower, only ever having to unpack a duffel and a suitcase full of clothes and shoes and makeup. 
The good news that comes from being so tired is that you barely have the energy to argue with Bucky, often falling asleep on the couch halfway through dinner. The TV will continue to blare in the background, and Bucky will continue to chew silently. He lets you take the naps, gently waking you up once he’s done, and handing back your freshly heated dinner plate right back at you, just so you never eat a cold meal. In all honesty, it’s been wonderful.
Somehow, he’s nice to you, now. The two of you haven’t officially called a truce, but it goes unspoken, you suppose. You find yourself helping him more than usual, and certainly have stopped insulting him. You don’t know why. Why he’s being kind, and smiling, even in the privacy of your own home, where nobody else but the two of you have been, so you know for sure that there are no bugs or secret cameras.
The neighbourhood has been pretty quiet, and it seems the Senator is currently on a vacation of some sort, so you haven’t had the chance to profile him in person, or his house. Your own is quite nice, large with a swimming pool in the back garden. It’s modern, and neat, and oozes luxury. 
If you weren’t so fucked up, if you still wanted the ring and kids and picket fence, you would’ve loved it here. You can almost see it — a partner grilling an assortment of meats and vegetables that have been marinating in a secret spice mix for hours, kids splashing and playing about in the shallow end of the pool, you and other guests lounging on the chairs as the sun sets, washing everything in sight in hues of golden orange. Or if it’s just your family, maybe sneak some affection from your partner with a hand around their waist and a kiss pressed to the back of their neck. It’s perfect. Given that Bucky’s from the 40s, he must be losing his mind. He’s pretending, albeit, but he’s gotten the simple life he must’ve dreamed of and clung to. It’s a shame he’s with you.
Which brings you to right now, standing in front of the oven with your arms crossed, waiting for an old-fashioned timer to go off. You stare at it, at the minutes ticking by. There’s nothing much left to do. You’ve already unpacked all the kitchen crockery, throwing away the last of the cardboard. The blue frosting and white icing is mixed and ready on the counter, and you hate yourself. It’s March 10th, today. Bucky’s birthday. 
His kindness in these past two weeks has completely swayed you, so here you stand, baking him a fresh batch of cupcakes you’re going to be decorating, just for him. You don’t know why, it feels like you glanced at your new phone, registered the date, and all you did was blink and now here you stand. Bucky’s still fast asleep in his bedroom.
That was another relief of the house — there were two bedrooms. Thank God, the two of you sleep separately. You’ve shared a bed before, on several missions and attempts to get the two of you to enter a state of permanent civility, and oddly enough you missed those nights sometimes.
When you weren’t tired enough, so the nightmares ran rampant in the small area of your brain and the large expanse of your imagination. Sometimes you’d wake up pressed tightly against him, and you knew he must have held you to ground you. Other times, he’d still be fast asleep, and you would often trace all the intricate ridges and details of his vibranium arm. You’ve gotten adjusted to the sight of his brand new, human arm, but you miss the black and gold. You’d rather die than verbally express so, but you miss it. You miss the way it soothed you, distracted you. The way it created space in your mind for something that wasn’t torturous memories lashing out at you. 
If he knows about it, he’s never said anything. About the nightmares. Not even two nights ago when you had woken up screaming and trying to escape out the window, desperate to escape a phantom wielding a bloodied knife. He’d just calmed you down, talked you back to the centre of the room and held you.
He likes doing that a lot now, finding excuses to touch you. It’s comforting, like you’ve been on edge your entire life and are just now finding peace. You hate it. You hate everything about your current situation, but it’s simultaneously a humongous relief. To not have to constantly have your guard up and be ready to fire insults like they’re bullets. You can just be, and revel in the way he’s not treating you like he’d rather be anywhere else.
The timer goes off. The cupcakes cool. The recipe is something your mother taught you — your only remaining inheritance you carried with you. You smother them in frosting, writing HAPPY BIRTHDAY BUCKY with one letter on each cupcake, leaving two for free reign. You chose to simply put the number 107 on each of them, and arrange them on a wonderful, dark blue tray.
You let yourself smile, proud of the work you’ve accomplished so far, at only 9AM in the morning. And then, a voice grubbed over with sleep, yet not as annoying as you remember calls out.
“Whatcha bakin’ there, doll?” You turn to him, rubbing his eyes and yet thankfully wearing a shirt. His hair is still messy, and you move forward to fix it for him as he shoots you another lazy grin. This has become somewhat of another step of routine between the two of you. He always wakes up with messy hair he cannot be asked to comb, and you got tired of berating him for it. He’d complain theres no mirror around and being to pout until you huffed and fixed it for him.
You try and pretend like you don’t notice his conspicuous eyes fixed on your face like he’s desperate to memorise it. 
“Happy birthday.” You decide to keep your words simple, staring directly into his eyes, so blue that they make some long-forgotten muscle in your chest restart.
You turn around to ignore that feeling, heading back to the counter where your frosted treats await. You miss the desperate, aching look of longing on his face. It brings back memories of him, of how he acted the last time you bothered to remember one of the most basic facts about him — how he’d pretty much thrown your gifts across the room and stormed out of his own birthday party without so much as another word.
He swears to be different now. To be different to you. In all honesty, it didn’t take a genius to figure out why you dislike him so, but on the journey here, he was finally able to read between the lines. It’s pathetically embarrassing to admit why he acted that way towards you, especially now. He wonders if you’d laugh at him, shape it into another painful weapon to aim for his diaphragm.
“Happy Birthday, Bucky. I know being stuck with me isn’t ideal, well, let’s be honest, you’d probably rather be back in cryo—.”
“No I wouldn’t,” he replies all too fast, staring down at the tray in your hands. He tries to ignore the rampant beat of his heart as he registers that you finally called him Bucky, instead of literally anything else. He knows you do it to spite him, and admires that you’d still never call him the Winter Soldier, despite how deep the faux hatred between the two of you ran. Well, faux hatred on his part.
He’s been in love with you for years. And when he finally realised it, you’d already moved past trying to be nice to him. He’s missed his chance with you, he knows this. But he finds himself growing more and more desperate with every passing year to manufacture that chance. But every time he builds up the courage, it seems you’re too busy flirting or eye-fucking literally anyone who isn’t him. And it crushes him beyond belief, every single time.
Without fail.
“Oh, okay. Didn’t mean to bring that up. Erm, I made you these cakes. They’re my mum’s recipe, and as far as I know you’re not allergic to anything in here.” He plasters a grin right back on his face.
“Aren’t you gonna sing for me, doll?” God, you wish you could hate that nickname. But it’s a step above Butterface, that’s for sure. And as much as you hate him, it is his birthday. You don’t know how much you can bring yourself to deny him, especially what with all the kindness he’s been showing you recently.
“Do you want me to?” God, Bucky wishes you could love him back. That those beautiful eyes he dreams about so often, just stare at him with some warmth, some fondness. Like you did when he first got here, when he didn’t deserve your affection. But those versions of the both of you are long gone. 
“‘Course I do. It’s my birthday after all.” You roll those pretty eyes and huff, pretending to be annoyed. 
You grab the candles from the cutlery drawer you bought in a last minute impulse on your grocery shopping run, and stick them in two of the cupcakes, lighting them with your lighter — the only physical inheritance from your mother. You still remember that night, when she pressed it into your small hands and begged you to hide underneath the bed, before all hell broke loose. She always had a lit cigarette in her hand, and the smell of ashes always brings memories of her floating back to you. It’s a simple golden one, engraved with a venomous snake on the front and her name embossed — her name before she got married. It’s your most prized possession. Bucky watches as you run a thumb over it with that fond look in your eyes, and his heart catches in his throat. You’ve never been more vulnerable than you are in this moment, not even when you were on the floor crying over the thought of pretending to be married. All of your guards are temporarily lowered, and he sees how your hard exterior gives way to something softer and warmer, a version of you long buried under the stresses of your job and the malice you exude in his presence.
And he’s obsessed with the ring on your finger, the way you play with it when bored or pensive. Actually, he’s just obsessed with you. You begin singing with a small, yet seemingly genuine, smile on your face. He thinks it’s the most beautiful sound he’s ever heard. 
You have a lovely voice, even if it’s reserved for showers and to be lost in impromptu choirs. But his heightened senses mean he can still pick your voice out of the crowd, can still feel the weight of it wash over him like a perfect blanket. He wishes you’d cling to him like that, like the songs you sing when you think nobody’s listening or paying attention.
And then you call him Bucky again, and his heart goes out the window. He’s practically vibrating where he stands and clutching his fists to his sides in trying not to kiss you. You wouldn’t like that. When you finish, he closes his eyes and wishes for you like he does every year. 
He guesses a lesser man would’ve lost hope, after seven birthday wishes asking for one person, and yet still having them so close yet so out of reach. But he’ll beg, every year, until someone out there decides he shall have no more. He’d beg for you any time, in any way you like. His heightened sense of hearing, and the two of you living on the same floor, means he already knows how much you enjoy being begged for pleasure. How much you enjoy being in charge.
When he first got to New York after Wakanda, the only room that was available was across the hall from yours. He didn’t mind. Even though he’d completely forgotten how to talk to people he finds insanely attractive, so insanely enigmatic that all he can do is try his best to not let drool drip out of his mouth when he watches you do even the most mundane things like eat cereal with your hair still messy from a long night, in a sports bra and joggers. Showing off every inch of that perfect body he’s worshipped so many times in his dreams. It’s why he hasn’t moved out of there, because of the perverted side of him. Something he’d rather die than admit.
And of course everyone in the damn building knows, how could they not? When they see the way he looks at you when you storm out of a room, how he almost misses the punching bag when he sees you training weights across the room with sweat slicking your hair to your forehead. He thinks you’ve never looked more irresistible, and he’d do anything to get his hands on you, in any way you allow. Why do you think he asks you to spar so often? 
You grin at him. “Bucky privileges are only for these 24 hours, then I go right back to James. And I got you something.” You hand him the tiny box, gift wrapped in blue as he looks at you with an adorable blush on his face.
“You really didn’t have to do all of this, doll.”
“I wanted to make you feel more at home. And I needed to talk to you about something.” You’re wearing one of his old flannel shirts, folding your arms across your chest. You’d requested some of his bigger, older shirts to wear, and had told him it’s considered a form of deep intimacy in the 21st century. And those six shirts are all you’ve worn around the house, often with biker shorts on underneath. You know, just to drive him to ridiculous heights of insanity, of course. 
“We should call a truce. Officially. I mean, we’re being civil, and it goes unspoken. But officially, for the record, we should call a truce. At least, not be mean to each other. I wanted today to be the beginning of it, end date TBD.”
“Yeah, that’s fine with me. Now, can I open it?” You nod, gesturing at the box. You watch his face as he delicately unwraps your birthday gift, for any signs of discomfort on his face. If he’s truly okay with the peace you’ve proposed between the two of you. 
“Come here.” He commands. You’re surprised how quickly you comply, walking across the counter to stand mere inches from him. You wonder if he’s going to treat this gift like he did the last, and make sure you end up crying this time. 
“This is a wonderful gift, doll. I really, really love it. Thank you.” Before you can protest, he pulls you in for a quick side hug. You don’t miss how his blue eyes glow as he takes the New York keyring out of it’s container, running his thumb over the Statue of Liberty. 
He feels…so warm. And so cosy, all perfect for snuggling up. You find yourself wishing he hadn’t pulled away from the hug, desperate to feel more of his warmth against you than ever before. You suppress the need as it emerges, but you’re not strong enough.
“Yeah yeah. Whatever. What do you wanna do today? We could go out.” You try to remain impartial, but it’s proving difficult.
Keeping up all of your guards and walls is becoming more and more difficult with each passing day, and you find yourself becoming soft. The one thing you despise, but you also crave. 
You have no idea what’s happening to you.
And it’s terrifying.
NEXT PART
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banquetwriter · 8 months ago
Note
I saw you were taking requests for Carl grimes so maybe a fluff with Carl and reader who has ADHD and they’re in Alexandria but she’s like hella overstimulated and overwhelmed because everybody and everything’s new and like “better” and she genuinely just does not know what to do with herself. You don’t have to do this btw! Have a wonderful day/night!
୨୧ Breathing ୨୧
pairing: Carl Grimes ♡︎ Fem!Reader
warnings: ୭̥⋆*。 crying, some angst, one mention of sex (incredibly mild) small mentions of canonical violence, reader has panic attack
summary: ʚ after being overwhelmed your favorite grime’s comforts you ɞ
Words: 1374
AN: RAAAHHH thank you sm for the request, i tried to focus on how i personally feel when i get overwhelmed and overstimulated. i didn’t make her very bubbly or stereo typically “adhd” however i tried to model it after mine lol
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You hated everything about the apocalypse. You hated never feeling safe, never having enough food, and never being clean ever. You hated being on the run always. You fucking hated it.
But still, you found yourself anxious. A nice woman named Deanna sat you down and Interviewed you. Your heart was racing, it had been for a long time. It was the same feeling you felt being adopted by Glenn and Maggie, the unofficial daughter of the couple.
Feeling like you might start crying but you can't pinpoint your feelings. Being so light-headed the air feels like it is made out of cotton candy. You had stayed quiet to avoid any meltdowns in front of anybody.
You had been assigned one big house. Michonne and Rick take one room, Daryl another, and you bunker with Judith. You found her little coos and cries comforting sometimes. They grounded you when you felt clueless.
Judith and most importantly her brother Carl were what got you through everything. Glenn’s death, a man who was your father. Carl had since you got to the prison. It was hard not to fall in love with him. Even if it wasn't the right time or place. You couldn't help it.
It's how you accepted the prison. It's how you accepted what happened at Terminus, and it was going to be how you accepted this new world you found yourself in. Carl got his own room. You weren't upset by it.
He needed his space. He had been through too much. It was after dinner. You were sitting on the stairs. It was all too much. It was going to go away at some point…
You knew it. Nothing was safe forever. You knew that, you weren't some stupid child. The feeling was back of unintelligible panic. The feeling of horror creeping up your throat. The dizziness, and now you couldn't help but cry.
The cool air of the nighttime clung to your skin. You were sweating even though the night was cold. Hot tears streamed down your face. How could you help these people? How could you possibly help? Hell, you were fear-stricken over being someplace new.
You let out a sob you had been holding in for weeks. Everyone was in the house either cleaning up or windowing down for bed. You told them you needed to go on a walk before bed.
‘You were too restless’ that's what you told them. But here you were sitting down on the steps. A full belly, sobbing your eyes out. Carl had noticed of course he had.
You heard the door close behind you. You stood up, the hot tears still streaming down your face. “Hey, woah,” Carl said, clicking the door shut and walking up to you. You couldn't say anything, fear holding your heart.
You speedily tried to wipe the tears away from your face. His hands come down to your shoulders. His fingertips ghost your skin and shirt. “I-I'm sorry,” you mumble out before the tears start spilling from your eyes again.
“Hey hey hey,” he whispers, pulling you into his chest. His strong hand finds its way to the back of your head, the other snaking around your torso. There it was again. His heartbeat thumped through his chest reaching your ears.
“I'm scared,” you whispered. He pulls away from you keeping his hands secured on you. “I-I know you are y/n. I am too. But it's going to be ok, trust me.” he said, his hand coming up to your chin and holding it up. “How do you know we are going to be ok?” you ask, shaking my head.
“I just know,” he said, his voice soft and comforting. “Because I am here. Because you're here with me.
Judith is here, so is my dad, Michonnee, and Daryl…” he said. “We are all here with you. I know how scared you are because-” he started. He shifted his weight on his feet.
You looked up at him. Your eyes are full of tears. The sight alone broke his heart. He promised himself he would always protect you. After you got separated from the prison. He was never ever letting you out of his sight again.
“Because I'm scared too. This place could fall, or not be safe. I'm scared too.” he says leaning much closer to you. “That's not it. It's all so new. Everything is better. I don't even know what to do. I don't remember how not to be so broken.” you whispered.
Your words hit like a confession to a preacher. “Y-Your not broken,” he said trying to comfort you. “No Carl I am. I think we all are. And I don't know how I'm going to do this.” I said, feeling the tears start to slip out.
“You don't have to do this alone, or even right now. Taking it one day at a time would be a good place to start,” he said, trying to wipe your tears away. “Ok.” is all you said, the heat radiating off of him calming your rapid and hyper thoughts.
“Tonight, how about you sleep with me? In my room?” he asks. “Really? What about Judith, what would your dad and Michonne say?” you ask, pressing your body against his. Time seemed to stop. His blue eyes shine into your soul.
“We can keep Judith in there too. Two people watching her is safer anyway. And don't worry about my dad ok? I will talk to him.” he says, moving both of his hands to your cheeks. Placing a small kiss on your forehead.
You swore you could feel your heart soar high above all the clouds and skies. You silently nod your head, “Go and get ready for bed and meet me in my room ok?” he says nodding towards the house. You smiled walking in.
The group looked as you rushed past them. Carl followed suit walking into the house. His hands were on his hips. “Y/n is going to stay with me tonight. In my room.” Carl said, looking at his dad.
Michonne’s eyebrow shot up. She looked at Judith with a smirk and turned around leaving the boys to discuss. “Carl-” Rick says in his stern voice. “It's not like that Dad,” he says, putting his hand out. Rick’s head turned to the side.
“She is scared, Dad. And I made a promise to protect her. She doesn't trust this place yet. I'm not gonna let her go.” Carl says, his face staying stern. He wasn't going to take ‘no’ for an answer. You were all that mattered to him right now.
Rick rubbed his chin, “Look alright. She can stay in your room as long as you take Judith with you.” he said, walking up to his face. Rick used his pointer finger and used it to tap his son's chest. “If I hear any funny business-” he says in full seriousness.
“Ew. Gross dad.” Carl says, rolling his eyes. Walking past him and running up the stairs to the bathroom. He gave a small knock on it. He heard your voice waver out a Small “Yes?” he smiled.
“It's me, Carl. You ready for bed?” he asked you. “A-Almost. Got distracted again,” you shouted from the bathroom. Carl felt his smile grow wider. “I'm gonna put Judith down now ok? Join me when you're ready,” he says, starting to walk away.
“Ok! Thank you!” you shout from the bathroom, continuing to get ready to sleep. Carl brought his baby sister and a crib into his room. Making it all nice for her. That's when you walked in. You were so beautiful.
In a plain new outfit. Eyes red and puffy from crying. You still were the prettiest thing he had ever seen. You silently sat on the bed. Carl smiled at you, something you returned. He took his hat off, placing it on the bedside table. He crawled on the bed and behind you. Beckoning you to join him under the covers.
Something you did with ease. The comforting smell of Carl Grimes fills your nose. As his hands snake around your torso to hug you. His nose gently rubs against your neck.
“I love you.”
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reinerswarrior · 1 year ago
Note
Possessive and jealous Reiner angrily groping and ravaging Reader, please…
(Your smuts are awesome)
Banging On The Wall
AUTHORS NOTE- thank you sm,I’m glad you all love them- I hope that this is up to par lmao. I went a lil overboard
Warnings: overstimulation,cheating (not really) cream pie,grinding,wallsex, feral Reiner, gn reader
BAM-!
The wooden door creaked under your weight as you felt your body being shoved against it and two rough hands sliding up your stomach under your shirt as they proceeded to grope your chest in a hungry and angry way while hot breath was fanning against the back of your neck, making the tiny hairs on your neck prickle.
Grunting, Reiner grabbed you roughly by your upper arms, pinning you against the cold, unforgiving wall. His hardness pressed against your lower stomach, through your clothes. "You want me to show you how much I hated seeing you like that?" He growled against your neck as you whine and squirm in his steel hold
You had not wanted to try to make him act up, but you should of known what would happen when he caught you and Eren together with the other males lips going in for yours but you had tried to explain to him that he made the move and Reiner himself saw you push Eren away before his lips met yours, so you should’ve been able to calm the other down since you didn’t even see Reiner standing there when it happened.
“I didn’t mean to make you jealous…I’m sorry” you moan as your legs widen to give him more access to your clothed sex. "Stop talking and start begging," Reiner growls into your ear. He grinds against you harder, his erect cock grinding against your clothed sex through the fabric of his pants. "Beg for it." He repeated against your neck and it makes you squeak, feeling yourself get aroused and even more than you should from such rough treatment
“P-Please..” You whisper as your hand tangled into the back of his hair. "Please what?" Reiner asks, his voice dark and demanding. He continues to grind against you, his hips meeting yours in a rough rhythm. "Tell me what you want." He cooes,not letting you off the hook as easily as he could of but you could tell by the jealousy swimming in his now amber eyes that he wasn’t in the mood to give you any slack
“Please..take your anger out on me..fucking ravage me” You beg him as he sucked in a deep breath before he spoke. “That's it," Reiner growls, and with a quick motion, he lifts you up by the hips and presses you against the wall. “That’s what I like to hear, baby” He murmured and you felt yourself shudder at the lust dripping off the others tongue
Your legs wrap around him and you hold on tight as his clothed erection dragged against your sex. “Say it again," Reiner demands, his voice low and menacing. His fingers fumble with his belt, undoing it quickly. "I want to hear you beg for it..again” He murmured and you watch his skilled hand undo his belt as your thighs quiver. “Reiner..baby..ravage me like the beast you are” You coo in a needy tone,and you were thankful you only had on underwear and a shirt at this point,your pants long ripped off.
“Good," Reiner growls, the sound sending shivers down your spine. He pushes your underwear down to your thighs, exposing your hole. With a fierce growl, he slams his hard cock into your waiting entrance. Your back arches when you feel the hot erection force it’s way inside you and a whine left your throat while his balls rested against your ass
"Fuck," Reiner groans, his hips slamming into yours in a rough rhythm. He's possessive and demanding, claiming you as his own. There's no finesse to his movements; he's all about taking what he wants with an animalistic force. “R-Reiner! You're so rough...“ you whimper,your body arching under his, trying to match his pace. Your chest heave with each harsh thrust, nipples hardening from the sensation. "R-Reiner...” you repeat
Reiner's thrusts grow even more forceful, his hips slapping against yours in a primal mating dance. He bites down on your neck, leaving a mark as he takes what he wants with a growl. "Mine," he grunts between ragged breaths. “Not Erens..your all mine” He rasps against your neck and you squeeze around his cock,making him groan against your marked neck. You moan, your eyes rolling back as you feel the bite mark form on your neck. Despite the roughness, you can’t help but to feel yourself craving more of this possessive onslaught . "R-Reiner..." You pant, your body trembling slightly under his onslaught “m’ all yours baby”
Hearing your words, Reiner growls low in his throat. His hands grip your hips tighter as he pistons into you, driving deeper with each thrust. The head of his cock brushes against all of your sensitive spots, sending shivers down your spine. Your back rubbed against the wall with each thrust and as he hit your sweet spots,your eyes roll back and your legs wrap around his muscular hips while you tighten. “Reiner I’m gonna cum-!” You wail and You feel Reiner respond.
"Cum for me," Reiner groans, his hips bucking wildly. He's close too, the feel of your tightening around him driving him wild. His cock throbs inside you, about to erupt. "Y-yes," You whimper, your orgasm hitting you hard and fast the moment you heard him command you to finish. You are completely unable to form any coherent thoughts as pleasure ripples through your body, and your walls clenching around Reiner's cock as you cum hard around him but then instantly feels that he’s about to unload inside you and you gasp out a warning. “N-Not inside-!”
With a roar, Reiner continues his wild thrusting, showing no sign of slowing down. His cock feels like it's on fire, and his seed spurts deep inside you making you gasp in horror. He growls loudly, his climax shaking him to the core as he shudders next to you,panting heavily as his erection twitches,spurting it’s potent load inside of you.
Your nails rake up his back as you whimper in pleasure “R-Reiner-?! Y-You came inside!” You exclaim as you beat his back with your hand but it does nothing to him “do you know what that means-?!” But your a whining mess as he never stops moving and Reiner lets out a low laugh, still pounding into you. "Do I look like I care?" He growls, his body trembling with pleasure. His cock throbs inside you, milking your walls dry of their love juices. "You're mine,baby...”
You cry out and clench over his cock,your insides overstimulated and you could feel how hot his cock was,and by the trembling of his muscular thighs,you could tell he was overstimulated but tried not to show it. "Mine," Reiner growls, his seed pushing deeper into you. His hips buck wildly, sending spasms of pleasure up your spine. You're his now, completely claimed. The knowledge sends a shiver down your spine. but his voice was changing into whimpers and he was feeling weaker from overstimulation,his balls throbbing and you rub his shoulder blades,
“Cmon Reiner..you can do it..” You murmured “make me yours” you were secretly hoping that he wouldn’t collapse because you could tell by the way his face was straining that he was fighting and using every bit of his strength to try and milk a second orgasm out of you both. Reiner's eyes roll back in his head, his body shuddering as he tries to maintain control. His cock twitches inside you and his thighs struggle to keep him standing as his thrusts got choppy and he knew he needed to finish fast or change positions
You continue to murmur sweet things to him as the beast against you shudders and delivers fast and sloppy thrusts inside you and you feel him wobble. “M-Maybe you should..ah-..sit down?” You suggest as his sweaty torso pushes and pulls against yours but he doesn’t listen. Reiner's eyes snap open, his beast-like instincts taking over. With one last mighty thrust, he hollows his cheeks and releases his hot seed deep inside you. His body shudders as he moans out in release, his thighs finally giving out from under him.
“REI-!” You yelp as you feel him give way underneath you and you hold onto him for dear life as you slide down the wall with him. “Please..make me cum..just a little more Rei-!” Reiner's hips grind against you, his cock still pulsing out his seed inside you. With a groan, he reaches down and grips his own length, stroking himself roughly as he tries to bring himself back to full strength enough to fuck you to completion. You were used to his stamina so it wasn’t that new to go multiple rounds but not so soon after the other burn you figured he just wanted to claim you completely but you could tell he was reaching the end of his stamina “baby..y-you dont have to..”
"Shh," Reiner breathes, his voice rough from exertion. "I want to." He groans again, his hips bucking against your hand. "Just a little more." Reiner groans, his hips grinding against you. "Just... let me." His voice is strained as he pushes one last time deep inside you, holding himself there as his muscles shudder. You moan at the feeling of him pressing against your sweet spot and you reach down to rub your sex to get yourself off faster because the poor male above you between your thighs was trembling and you knew he was going to cum dry when he did cum again.
Reiner groans as his hips buck against you, his muscles quivering with the effort. His cock twitches inside you and he grinds out, "F-Fuuck..." his movements were sloppy and erratic as he struggled to coax a orgasm from his empty balls. As your hand worked yourself harder, you were quickly reaching another one of your climaxes as you lay back against the wall with the male hunched over you between your legs. “Fuck, yes!" Reiner growls, his eyes squeezing shut as he tries to fight through the overstimulation. His body shudders again, and he groans out, "Nngh, so close."
You could feel every heartbeat pulse through his chest and his cock as you clench upon him and practically wail out in complete ecstasy and you convulse under him and your orgasm squirts out and makes a mess everywhere as you chant his name out like a prayer. You fall back Reiner's body tenses as he feels your orgasm. His eyes fly open, watching you squirm beneath him, his cock throbbing inside you. "Y/n!" He roars, his voice filled with primal lust and pride. You collapse on the floor,completely fucked out as his eyes stare down at you and his hand slides up your chest to your neck, squeezing it.
“Your fucking mine,baby…don’t- ngh-!..forget that-!” He growls before erupting inside you, his seed shooting out against your walls with more force than anything so far and you were shocked he had anything left but you couldn’t think as he flopped down on top of you,panting like a dog while his whole body shook
Neither of you could speak after that, instead you two cuddled and it was Reiner who spoke up,his voice wheezy and hoarse.
“I-I fucking love y-you,please don’t ever l-leave me”
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