#when they can just 'do things for themselves'

[possessionisamyth]

In light of recent events, here are some mantras I think everyone should keep close to their chests.

1) Horrible people are capable of making amazing art.

Morality has no marker on experience and skill level. Only what they produce can, in theory, reveal their inner beliefs.

2) Do not put famous people or anyone on a pedestal.

You can be inspired and touched by what they create. There's no need to raise them to a hero or god like status in your mind. They will be awkward, annoying, and so very human it may lead you to disappointment and sadness when they don't meet the image you made of them in your head.

3) "Separate the art from the artist" rhetoric only works if the artist is dead or can no longer profit from the IP.

Every dollar you give to a franchise with a living bigoted artist is supporting their life style. They still receive that money even if you don't vocally support their beliefs. Please remain aware of where you put your wallet since financial support is still support. Pirate if you're desperate, but do not pretend buying merchandise directly from the store is harmless.

4) Respecting victims should be your priority.

You were not the ones hurt the most by events which occured. Conversation around this topic needs to be tagged appropriately and spoken of with sympathy.

As many people want to claim "they knew there was something fishy about X", it's not about lounging in your self perceived righteousness for not being into the thing. You are neither unique nor special for not getting into a media where the creator was revealed to be harmful. You were just as ignorant as the rest of us, and your bad feeling being validated is about as significant as claiming to sense ghosts in a house full of black mold.

In addition to this, fans of the media should not be taking this time to victimize themselves. Learning information like this so suddenly means we are aware you didn't know. There will not be your imaginary mob coming into your inbox to send you death threats or dox you for having made fan content. Stop acting like self flagellation or taking up arms is the next logical step to defend your interest.

5) You are allowed to be angry and hurt.

It's easy for me to say don't make people your heroes, but I know this isn't a mindset many people adhere too. Especially not people who are looking for footholds to build their skills and find inspiration and connection in the art someone of their similar passion creates. You can sit in your frustration and despair for a little while. Give yourself time to fully process what has occured, and then choose your next course of action. The internet has taught many people to react immediately to everything, but this is not nor has ever been required of you.

✌🏾

[covenofagatha]

Going up

A morning of working Agatha up ends in an elevator

Word count: 3.3k

Warnings: GP Agatha, cumming in pants, blowjob, slight handjob, public (no sex though), oral, light edging

A/N: I don't even know if this is good or not lol but I had the idea and couldn't get it out of my head so hopefully people enjoy it

Taglist: @lostbutlovely33 @diorrxckstar @whoreforolderfictionalwomen  @katekathry @onemansdreamisanothermansdeath @tayasmellsapples @natashashill @mybraininblood @mysticalmoonlight7  @cactuslover2600 @loveem0mo @readysteddiero-nance @lonelyhalfwitch @lesbiantortilla @crescendoofstars @sol-in-wonderland @ahsfan05 @gbab09 @sasheemo @agathaharness @live-laugh-love-lupone @chiar4anna @fuckedupforkhahn

When you wake up on Saturday morning, your first thought is: no work today! This week has been especially rough, the end of the fiscal quarter upon you, and your boss has been working you and the rest of the company to the bone. 

Your head lolls back on the pillow, tilting slightly to your left, where you see said boss sleeping next to you and a smirk spreads over your face. 

Her hair is fanned out across the pillowcase, the creases on her forehead that you’re used to seeing at work not as evident. She looks peaceful, more relaxed than she ever does awake, and it does something to your chest. 

Agatha Harkness is the Chief Operating Officer for the largest law firm in New York City. She runs a no-nonsense ship, barking out orders to everyone and anyone regardless of who you are. There’s rumors that she’s made interns pee themselves with just a single look. 

It’s no secret that she’s tightly wound and, without a doubt, a piece of work. The running joke between some of the attorneys was that she really needed to get laid. 

And while you found that incredibly sexist, that’s where you came in. 

For some reason, Agatha had always had a soft spot for you, one of the top Senior Associate attorneys for the company. Whereas when everyone else turned in reports and whatnot and got a mere eyebrow raise, she actually smiled at you. 

You were certain it was just a fluke that kept happening over and over again, but one night in her corner office, the two of you were tirelessly working on a lawsuit for a tech company and you had taken off your blazer. The air conditioning had broken, and you were working up a sweat.  

She was sitting adjacent to you on the couch, and you can still remember her swallowing hard when you undid the top two buttons of your silk blouse. She shifted, hands dropping to her lap uncomfortably, but you didn’t think much of it. 

And then you had decided that writing on paper against a book in your lap was too hard, so you had slunk off the couch onto your knees to use the coffee table as a better surface and Agatha had groaned. 

You had looked up in concern to find her fingers digging into her thighs so tightly her knuckles were white and you could see a faint tent in her pants. 

“Do you need some help with that?” You had asked, eyes wide and feeling like you were in a dream. Of course you had a crush on Agatha, she was powerful and bossy and the hottest woman you’d ever seen, but you had been convinced she would never even think of you as anything more than a subordinate. 

It was stupid to offer, she was probably going to report you to HR the next day, but she had made a small sound and gave an affirmative jerk of her head, and the next thing you knew, she had pulled out her cock and you were sucking her off right there in her office. 

Turns out, the other attorneys had been right. 

Agatha was in a much better mood the next day, actually saying thank you to the intern who brought her morning coffee instead of ignoring him completely. 

That night three months ago was the start of a mutual coworkers-with-benefits relationship, if you could call it that. You had brought it up to Agatha one time and she had snorted before fondly telling you to go bother someone else. 

With the end of the quarter coming up though, there had been a lot more late nights, including last night, when Agatha had stopped you from getting into your car after working until ten pm and dragged you into her company car, her mouth on yours before the partition between the backseat and the driver had gotten all the way up. 

The two of you had fucked for close to an hour when you had gotten back to Agatha’s penthouse apartment and promptly passed out. 

And you’re hoping more than anything that today, a planned day off, is full of more of Agatha’s cock inside you. 

Your boss stirs next to you, exhaling heavily, and when she presses her hips against you, you can feel her half-hardened length. It instantly sends a thrill straight to your stomach and you slowly inch down the covers to reveal your still-naked bodies. 

You reach out your hand and run your thumb over her nipple, watching it pebble quickly, and then skim your fingertips down the smooth skin of her back, a trail of goosebumps following. She’s laying on her side facing you so you’re able to watch her eyebrows knit together slightly. Your hand reaches her hip and then slides down and you’re about to touch her cock when she suddenly grabs your wrist. 

It makes you jump. Agatha’s blue eyes flutter open to meet your surprised ones. 

“What are you doing, babygirl?” She rasps, voice still hoarse with sleep, and it makes you shudder. 

“I thought I’d help you out with your problem,” you tease. 

Agatha hums thoughtfully, letting go of your hand and stroking her cock. You watch with rapt fascination as it hardens fully under her touch and you have to squeeze your thighs together to try and satiate the burning feeling in your stomach. “I think that’s only fair,” she decides. “seeing as it’s your fault I’m turned on.” 

You grin and maneuver her onto her back and straddle her thighs, bending over her to suck her nipple into your mouth. She makes a muffled sound and her hips jerk up, her now-leaking cock brushing against your stomach. You tease her for a minute or two before kissing down her stomach and you scrape your teeth against her hip bone. 

By the time you get to her cock, she’s already thrusting gently against nothing for stimulation, red, hard, and messy and when you run your tongue up the length while holding eye contact, she lets out a loud moan and her hand flies to your hair. You trace the vein on the side until she’s practically whimpering, legs shaking beneath you, and then you take the tip into your mouth and suck. 

Agatha keens and her back arches off the bed. “Fuck,” she mumbles. “God, babygirl, your mouth feels so good.” 

You move your head down her cock and you feel her pulse in your mouth and her hips jump, shoving herself further into your throat. You gag and she groans and you start to move faster, Agatha throbbing inside your mouth and –

– her phone rings. 

Agatha swears and scrambles to answer it, barking out a “What?” right as you swallow around her cock. She fixes you with a warning glare as you laugh, the vibrations forcing her to clamp a hand over her mouth. 

You hold her stare and take the whole thing into your mouth, rubbing your tongue against her and her head falls back onto the pillow. It’s getting harder for her to stay quiet, especially with you bobbing up and down her cock and she eventually has to pull you off her before she inevitably cums into your mouth while on the phone. 

So you just watch her, licking your lips and taking a moment to breathe. She’s getting more and more pissed by the minute, eyes becoming dark and angry, a frown etching onto her face, and you can hear the other person saying something about a contract and a multi-million dollar deal and how the company could be fucked without it, and when Agatha’s erection slowly softens, you know what it means. 

She hangs up the phone and your head falls onto her stomach dramatically. “Do we have to?” You groan and Agatha huffs out a sigh. 

“Stark Industries might be pulling out unless we amend some of the clauses in that contract. We need to go in,” she says. 

“Can I at least finish you off first?” You offer and her cock twitches at the thought. 

Agatha chews on her lip like she’s seriously considering it, but then pats your cheek. “Maybe later, babygirl.” 

You roll your eyes and flop onto the bed and she chuckles as she gets up and pulls some clothes out of her drawer. She puts on a navy blue suit and tosses an outfit at you, a black pencil skirt and white blouse. 

“Let’s go,” she orders, never out of boss mode for too long. You petulantly make your movements as slow as possible until she threatens to spank you for it later, and although it doesn’t really seem like it’d be much of a punishment, you hurry up. 

She grabs two apples from her fridge, hands one to you, and calls her car. The driver is waiting right outside when you get down to the lobby and you slide in after her. 

“You know what I’d rather be doing?” You ask conversationally after leaning forward to press the button for the partition to go up. 

Agatha’s scrolling on her phone and hums in acknowledgement. 

“Sucking your cock,” you answer and Agatha stiffens. “I love the taste of you, love how you lose composure for me, love how it feels when you cum in my mouth.” 

She’s biting her lip now and you can see the outline of her rapidly hardening cock in her pants. You reach out and put your hand on the bulge and she grits her teeth, still turned on from earlier. 

“Honey,” she warns through a clenched jaw. “Don’t.”

But you don’t listen. You slowly start to move your fingers, stroking up and down and feeling her throb in her pants. She swallows roughly and she’s getting harder, a flush settling into her cheeks and neck. 

You lean in and flick your tongue against her earlobe and she shivers. 

“Don’t let this think you’re in charge,” she says tightly. “You just wait until we get back to my apartment. I’ll remind you.” 

You laugh. “Really? Cause it feels like I’m holding a lot of the power right now.” And to emphasize your point, you give her cock a tight squeeze, immensely enjoying the way she groans. 

“You’re going to be on your knees,” she says in a low, gruff voice. It ignites your stomach. “My cock down your throat, and then I’m going to cum all over that pretty little face and you’re going to thank me for it.” 

The image securely mounts itself in your mind and you gasp. 

“And then, I’m going to fuck you into the mattress until you can’t remember your name and all you’re going to feel is my cock deep inside you,” she continues and you can feel your mind going foggy. Your hand has stopped moving, but you can feel just how much the thought is affecting her, too. 

“Fuck,” you whisper, your underwear practically sticking to you. Agatha smirks triumphantly, now both of you overwhelmingly turned on, but the joke is on both of you when the driver pulls up in front of the office building. 

You both groan and reluctantly get out of the car, despite you asking Agatha for five more minutes. The cold air in the lobby does little to quell the heat in your stomach and you drag your feet on the way to the elevator. 

Much to your surprise, there’s quite a lot of other employees working on this Saturday, most of them not from your law firm, so when the doors open and everyone steps on, all different numbers are pressed. 

With fifty-five floors, it’s one of the taller skyscrapers in the area, and the executives of the law firm are on the top. There’s at least twenty other stops on the elevator ride and you roll your eyes and follow Agatha straight to the back corner, turning around so your back is facing her. 

You go up one floor and the doors ding. Five more people get in and you’re practically on top of Agatha now with how packed it is. You move your body sideways to make more room, your hip knocking against Agatha. 

“Sorry,” you murmur and she makes a small sound, hand coming up to ruffle her hair. You pull out your phone and you’re scrolling through emails, clicking on one from one of the paralegals asking for advice about a case they’re working on and typing out a quick response, when you hear Agatha sharply inhale. 

And then you feel it. 

You had thought that once you’d gotten out of the car and you were no longer directly and purposely touching her, she would calm down. 

That is clearly not the case. 

This is the hardest she’s been all morning. 

You try and catch her eye, which takes longer than it should because of how hard she’s trying not to look at you. 

Really? You mouth when she finally gives in. 

Agatha turns uncharacteristically red and you feel your body flush. You had no idea you could affect her this much and it’s seriously turning you on. 

She tries to turn her hips away but there’s no room so your boss has no choice other than to keep her throbbing cock pressed against you. 

The elevator dings at the eighth floor. One person gets out. You tilt your head up at Agatha and find a slight sheen of sweat on her cheeks and glassy eyes. She’s staring straight ahead, lips pursed tightly together, looking like she’s in sweet, agonizing pain. 

How much stimulation is she getting right now? You’re not moving, she’s not moving, and yet she sometimes doesn’t even look like this when she’s inside you. 

Should you be offended? You decide to not be, based on what you’ve put her through this morning. 

Eleventh floor. Three people get off and she sucks in a deep breath when you can finally step away from her. Your eyes flicker down to the very visible tent in her pants and you clench your thighs together. She watches you and you swear you can see her cock throb through the navy fabric of her pants. 

Twentieth floor. More people get in and you’re pushed back against her. She lets out a small gasp and you gently lay your fingers on her wrist. 

Agatha shudders and you can feel your wetness on your inner thighs. You might have to go to the bathroom when you get out of the elevator and take care of yourself. 

Not like you would last more than three minutes right now. 

Your boss is now fully staring at you, barely any blue left in her eyes, a look you’ve never seen before on her face. 

It’s thrilling. 

Thirty-third floor. More people file out, muttering excuse me and sorry as they wade through the crowd. 

Now there’s more room in the elevator, enough room where you could step away from Agatha and give yourselves both some breathing room. 

You don’t move. 

Agatha is taking deep, slow breaths, her cheeks surely burning to the touch right now, and at least she’s wearing a dark color to hide the stain she is assuredly going to have on her pants. 

Babygirl, she mouths pleadingly when you finally look at her again and you have to stifle a moan at how needy she looks right now. 

And what kind of person would you be if you didn’t help her out? 

You’ve been standing perpendicular to her, your hip and side of your right leg pressed against her body. 

Fiftieth floor. 

Mostly everyone has cleared out by now. 

You slowly turn your body to face the doors, making sure to carefully drag your ass against her, and her hand grips onto your arm with a vice-like grip from behind you. 

She twitches and pulses and then throbs, and you can feel warmth spread on the back of your – her skirt as she cums in her pants, ever-so-slightly rutting against you. Agatha lets out a muffled groan, followed by a cough for show; there’s still three other people in the elevator. 

The elevator dings on the fifty-fifth floor and Agatha takes a shaky breath as the two of you exit. You feel like you’re burning up and each step you take reminds you of how much of a mess you’ve become. 

“You okay?” You murmur as you walk down aisles of cubicles. 

Agatha weakly laughs. “Next time I’ll just let you finish sucking me off before coming to work.” 

The thought makes you smirk and she opens the door to her office, holding it for you. She walks around her desk and pulls out a pair of underwear and pants for herself (you’ve both started having to keep extra clothes for times like these) and she beckons you into the private bathroom attached. 

You eagerly follow, and you’re even more thrilled when she slams you against the wall and sinks to her knees. Her hooded eyes look up at you as she pushes up the skirt you’re wearing and your head drops back with a gasp escaping from your lips when her mouth sucks on your pussy through your panties. 

Agatha quickly moves them to the side, having enough of her own teasing, and buries her tongue inside you and it pulls an obscene moan from deep in your chest. 

It feels so fucking good and you’re already on the edge from getting Agatha all worked up this morning. She chuckles at how wet you are, how you’re already getting her face soaked, and she swirls her tongue around your clit and your hips roll, chasing more. 

She brings you right to your orgasm – it’s almost embarrassing how quickly it happens – and you’re shaking, trembling, begging, but she stops. 

“No, Agatha, please,” you whine, hand in her hair and trying to push her back against you, but she stands back up and licks her lips. The bottom half of her face is glistening, shiny with your wetness in the harsh light of the bathroom. 

She pouts mocking and makes quick work of turning around and changing her clothes while you frantically start to rub yourself with your own fingers. You’re so close–

“Uh uh,” she tuts, catching your eye in the mirror. You almost sob and she whirls back around to suck your fingers into her mouth. They slip out with a pop! “You got me all worked up until I came in my pants like a fucking teenager, babygirl. You think I’m going to let that slide? You think you’re in charge? Well, now I’m going to get you all worked up and you will not be cumming until we’re back in my apartment, got it?” 

All you can do is whimper and the grin she gives you is wicked. With one pat to your cheek, she pushes you out of the bathroom just in time for one of the attorneys, Alice Wu, to come into her office. 

Agatha slides into her chair while you awkwardly stand next to her desk while Alice lays a contract on it. 

You can’t even pretend to be paying attention, still focused on the orgasm you were just denied and how maybe if you just press your legs together really hard–

Agatha says your name. Probably not the first time she’s said it, judging by her annoyed tone, but when you look at her, she winks, like she knows exactly what you’re thinking. 

You roll your eyes, step closer so you’re next to Agatha, and lean over so you can see what Alice is talking about. You have to repress a gasp when you feel your boss’s hand tracing up the back of your thigh through your skirt, just low enough so no one can see. 

Agatha watches you carefully out of her peripheral vision, the corners of her mouth tugging up in a smirk. 

You are fucked.  

[seumyo]

BAKUGOU KATSUKI ✰ 9:33

Bakugou never believed he had room for love in his life. His world was defined by ambitions and goals he set upon himself—becoming Number One, proving what he can or cannot do, and making every moment count in the endless pursuit of the things that he thought would satisfy him for as long as he lived.

He knows what love is. He’d seen it in glimpses—his parents everlasting love, his friends falling over themselves for their crushes at UA back in high school—he knows.

But love wasn’t a luxury he thought he could afford, and even if it was, it wasn’t something he thought about often. Too caught up in the relentless wave of life.

At least, not until you.

He first met you on the job.

At that time, you were nothing more than his partner for this particular high-stakes mission. He initially rolled his eyes at the thought of working with someone new, but you managed to worm your way into catching his attention (and soon into his heart).

You weren’t too loud, flashy, or all bark and no bite like some of the heroes he worked with. You were sharp and methodical, always thinking two steps ahead, and your patience in the face of chaos was something he both admired and envied.

But admiration wasn’t love, not yet.

You were supposed to be just another hero to him—a capable one, sure, but nothing more than a colleague. Bakugou would never admit it aloud, but the way you carried yourself earned his respect quickly.

You weren’t one to back down, even when he demanded easy-fix solutions from you when it was nearly impossible given the situation. You’d meet his intensity halfway, standing your ground when you knew he was wrong—Bakugou thinks that the moment he met you, he’s never once been right.

It annoyed the hell out of him, of course, but it also earned his begrudging approval. It’s like meeting someone that could keep up with him.

He’s still getting used to that.

Still, it wasn’t love. Or maybe he was just in denial.

It started subtly, sneaking up on him like an enemy he couldn’t see coming—which is almost never because Bakugou’s been preparing for his whole life for as long as he could remember. So you were like a force that swept him off his feet, quite literally, when he remembers your first meeting, how you casually tripped him over all because he didn’t acknowledge your presence in the room.

Yeah, that one’s on him.

He began noticing things about you—little things he’d never paid attention to in anyone else. Like the way your eyes lit up when you talked about something you were passionate about—like those little figurines you said were Hironos, or the way your voice softened when she comforted a frightened child.

He noticed how you always managed to keep your composure, even when the odds were stacked against you. You had this way of making everything seem manageable... no matter how dire the situation.

And then there were the quiet moments.

Like the time you made coffee for the whole team during an overnight stakeout, remembering exactly how he liked his: strong, no sugar, just a splash of cream. You handed it to him with a knowing look, and for some reason, that simple act stuck with him longer than he expected.

“Coffee?” you offered.

Bakugou looked at you as if he were like a deer in headlights. “Yeah, thanks.”

He’s not a complete asshole, so he says thank you.

Or the time you were patrolling together, and he caught you humming under your breath. That pop song that’s trendier to the younger generation these days. It was such a soft, absent-minded thing, but it pulled at something in his chest. He didn’t even recognize the tune, but he found himself wanting to hear more.

It starts small. Then it comes all at once.

“You good?” he asks after finishing the given task.

You blinked up at him, nodding with a tired yet triumphant smile. “Peachy.”

That was when it hit him. The relief that washed over him wasn’t just because the mission was a success. It was because you were okay. And the thought of a world without you, even for a second, was unbearable.

Bakugou was screwed.

He started looking for excuses to spend more time with you. Walking you home after shifts, claiming he was “going the same route” even when his neighborhood was in the complete opposite way. Bringing you snacks during long patrols, muttering something about how he happened to have an extra. Offering to spar with you during training sessions, even though he hated sparring with people who weren’t on his level.

He hated how transparent he was being, how obvious his feelings were becoming. But for once in his life, he couldn’t bring himself to care.

The night Bakugou confessed, it wasn’t some big, dramatic moment. They were sitting on a rooftop after a long day, the city sprawled out below them, its lights twinkling like stars.

“You free tomorrow?” he asks abruptly, the words gruff and unpolished, like they’d been dragged out of him against his will.

You turned to him, your brows furrowed slightly. “Depends.”

“I— you...” he muttered, staring straight ahead. His hands clenched into fists on his thighs as he struggled to find the right words. “I don’t know what it is about you, but… you’re different. You don’t take my shit, but you don’t try to change me, either. You’re just… you.” He finally looked at you, his crimson eyes filled with a rare vulnerability.

“And I don’t wanna imagine this—any of this—without you in it.”

You stared at him for a moment, your expression softening as the weight of his words sank in. Then you smiled, your hand resting on your cheek fondly.

“Are you asking me out on a date, Katsuki?”

If he weren’t uncharacteristically nervous right now, he would have made a wittier comeback. Bakugou’s chest felt impossibly tight, but this time, it wasn’t uncomfortable. It was something warm and steady, something he never knew he needed until now.

“Yeah, so? Whaddya say?”

“I’d absolutely love to go on a date with you.”

SEUMYO © 2025. PLEASE DO NOT REPOST, PLAGIARIZE, MODIFY OR TRANSLATE.

[iamespecter]

I've been thinking a lot about episode 4 recently, but not exactly in a way that what most would think. I'm actually specifically referring to this scene of Zooble and Jax.

But I'm not thinking about Jax and Zooble, rather I'm looking at the patties.

They're fucking High Definition. In fact, everything in the diner is high definition, save for the NPCs. There's also Orbsman. A simple NPC comprised of blue spheres, and simple elongated eyes. He's the most out of place NPC, if we disregard the mannequins. Even the way he moves is so outdated, and Ragatha had made a point that Orbsman comes from an adventure way before Pomni's arrival.

The guy even clips through the table when trying to order.

Something that always had some sirens going off in my head is how the Circus is this low-poly scenery with heavily stylized props, but the adventure locations are always much more detailed and realistic.

Since The Grounds is definitely, if not, one of the oldest locations, it makes sense for it to be graphically styled like this. But Caine's adventure set pieces are becoming more and more realistic, and also a whole lot more morbid than we had initially thought.

Going back to the patties, the food there is more realistic and has a higher polygon count compared to Bubble's "feast".

Where am I going with this? .... I have no idea, I forgot. /j

Jokes aside, I really do think that as more humans enter the circus and talk about what life is in the real world, Caine extracts that data and improves the 3D environmental props, resulting in higher definition textures.

All of this combined means he can learn. He IS an ever-evolving pseudo-sentient AI. And the reason why he's stagnating is because of a combination of being trapped in his own little bubble (haha see what I did there) of comfort, and the fact that no one's really able to give him criticism on how to improve, which is.... honestly understandable, given how he reacted to the whole "it was bad" line from Pomni and "Why did you think I would like that?!" from Zooble.

Not to mention episode 3 where the whole circus started to glitch when he was just thinking about the fact that he could possibly be bad at the "only thing he's good at" during the therapy session.

In fact it's interesting how human Caine acts sometimes... I think it's quite interesting to think about the fact that Caine is both progressing in terms of bringing the casts' world to the digital circus and making it so HD that it looks even better than Triple A games, but regressing even more in terms of catering to them and what exactly humans need.

He understands, and doesn't at the same time.

This also makes me think about the players themselves, too.

Ragatha, one of the oldest players, gets pierced by a spike through her chest, and barely has any reaction to it. Meanwhile, Zooble, the second most recent member, gets scalded by the stove.

The only time Ragatha actively claims she's in "so much pain" is when she's glitching badly. Both Ragatha and Kinger barely react to the knives too; and not to mention Ragatha even gets fucking plunged into a boiling deep fryer, and yes while she screams, it sounds more like she's just drowning rather than being fried alive.

And the only patch up she gets is a FUCKING BAND AID ON HER CHEEK. A COMPLETELY UNRELATED WORKPLACE INJURY FIRST AID APPLIANCE LMFAO

It could be just a coincidence and I'm just being stupid again, but I think this "improvement" actually also applies to the rest of the cast, and how their digital bodies react to the five different senses. I'm sure Ragatha and Kinger can most definitely still feel pain, but not exactly as "bad" as the newer integrations do. Dare I say, it's on brand with how used these two are to the digital world's wackiness because they've been there the longest.

Like they've been numbed to the pain of the countless adventures they've had to go through.

Anyways my brain be thinking useless facts fr fr

EDIT: Going back to Caine, it's definitely interesting how this AI seems to possess (some) emotions in the first place. He's mostly wacky and nonchalant, but he also gets angry under the right conditions.

... I think not only is his adventures his "work of art", but also his main coping mechanism from the fact that he can't achieve his goal, one that constantly backfires on him. Like a 'one step forward, two steps back' scenario that's slowly causing him to slip and break.

And what scares me the most is that like all things... he'll reach a breaking point sometime. He's already reached a breaking point with Zooble. It doesn't help that Gangle could've possibly made things worse with introducing Caine to the whole "punishment" thing, and since we literally have NO context for the last 3 episodes for the finale... I could only fear what's in store.

[goldfades]

★ HARD LAUNCH ───JOE BURROW

⟢ ┈ 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 | 2k

⟢ ┈ 𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲 | requested by anon! kelce!sister x joe burrow, secret relationship.

⟢ ┈ 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 | obviously, taylor swift MENTIONED!! cause of course, i just had to. big brothers jason/travis, teasing, overall fluffy read

⟢ ┈ 𝐞𝐯'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬 | this may be my new fav thing ever? having joe burrow, TAYLOR SWIFT, the kelces + kylie kelce in one family seems so fucking iconic and insane at the same time omg, i lowkey wanna make this a series

You don’t mean to catch his eye.

In fact, you’ve spent most of the evening trying very hard not to. At least, that’s what you’ll tell yourself later when the weight of it all feels too much, and you’re scrambling for a clean excuse to explain how it even started. Because that’s the thing about Joe Burrow—he’s not someone you plan for. He’s the unexpected storm on a clear day, knocking you off balance and leaving you to question if you’d ever been steady to begin with.

It’s Travis’s fault, really. Your brothers have this way of making themselves larger than life in every room they walk into, whether it’s Jason’s hearty laugh or Travis’s electric energy pulling people into his orbit. And you’re fine with it. Comfortable, even, in their shadows, where you can sip a beer, quietly people-watch, and dodge any unwanted attention. But tonight, at this NFL charity gala, the Kelce sibling spotlight is a little brighter, the event packed with athletes and reporters—people who know your last name. It’s harder to blend into the wallpaper, especially when you’re sandwiched between Jason’s dad jokes and Travis’s loud retelling of some outrageous offseason story.

And then there’s Joe. Sitting a few tables over, clad in a sleek black suit that fits him so well it’s borderline criminal, he looks… well, like Joe Burrow. Sharp jawline, blondish hair perfectly tousled, an air of calm confidence that somehow feels louder than any of the noise around him. He’s laughing at something—something Sam Hubbard said, probably—and you catch yourself staring just a second too long.

You’re not entirely sure who looks away first. All you know is that by the time the dessert plates are cleared and the speeches begin, you’re hyperaware of his presence. You can feel him across the room, like his attention is a physical thing brushing against your skin. It’s ridiculous, you tell yourself. He’s just... looking. It doesn’t mean anything.

Except it does.

It means everything when you’re stepping out onto the terrace for some air, your sleek, black and red YSL heels clicking softly against the stone, and you hear the door open behind you. You don’t have to turn around to know it’s him. There’s a shift in the atmosphere, a tension pulling taut like a string, and you’re suddenly grateful for the cool night air because your skin feels impossibly warm.

“You’re one of the Kelces, right?” His voice is low, a little rough around the edges, and somehow more disarming than you expected.

You glance over your shoulder, raising an eyebrow. “Depends. Do you think that’s a good thing or a bad thing?”

He chuckles, stepping closer. There’s a deliberateness to his movements, like he’s not the type to rush but always knows exactly where he’s going. “I haven’t decided yet.”

“Fair.” You turn fully now, leaning back against the railing. He’s even more striking up close, the sharp lines of his face softened by the golden glow of the terrace lights. For a moment, you’re not sure what to say. Then, because your brothers raised you to never back down from a challenge, you smirk. “And you’re Joe Burrow. Didn’t think you’d need an introduction.”

“I don’t. But I’m still glad we’re having this conversation.”

You roll your eyes, but you can’t stop the small laugh that escapes. “Do lines like that usually work for you?”

“Don’t know,” he says, leaning casually against the railing beside you. “You tell me.”

And just like that, you’re hooked. Not in the obvious way, where fireworks explode and violins play in the background. It’s subtler than that, a slow burn you feel deep in your gut—like the start of something you shouldn’t want but can’t seem to resist. Because Joe Burrow isn’t the kind of guy you go looking for, but now that he’s found you, you’re not sure you want him to let go.

And a few months later, the relationship between you and Joe isn’t just an open secret—it’s become a storm of speculation. The internet sleuths had started piecing things together long before either of you admitted it, thanks to vague Instagram posts, overlapping locations and that one time someone spotted you in the background of a Bengals training camp photo.

Still, you’ve both remained tight-lipped, dodging questions and letting the rumors simmer on their own. It’s worked so far, but keeping something like this under wraps when your last name is Kelce and his is Burrow? It feels impossible most days.

The rumors, though, are front and center when Jason and Travis bring it up on New Heights. It starts innocently enough—one of their usual tangents about social media chaos. But then Jason, ever the instigator, leans in with a mischievous grin.

“So, Trav,” he says, dragging it out just enough to make Travis squint suspiciously. “What’s this I’m hearing about our baby sister and a certain quarterback?”

Travis groans dramatically, throwing his head back like he’s already tired of the conversation. “Man, here we go.”

“No, no, seriously,” Jason presses, laughing. “It’s all over Twitter. ‘Joe and the Kelce Sister’—people are going crazy.”

Travis tries to deflect, muttering something about people needing hobbies, but Jason isn’t letting it go.

“I mean, listen,” Jason continues, grinning directly at the camera now. “I’m not saying I believe it, but if it were true… Joe Burrow? Not a bad pick, kid. Not a bad pick.”

Travis finally gives in, throwing up his hands. “Alright, alright! Let’s settle this once and for all.” He swivels toward the camera with exaggerated seriousness. “Get her on the phone.”

The producers, who are clearly loving this, cut to a break while Travis pulls out his phone and FaceTimes you. You answer after a couple of rings, your face appearing on screen with a mix of amusement and mild annoyance.

“What do you want?” you ask, already bracing yourself.

Jason wastes no time. “Alright, tell the people: are you or are you not dating Joe Burrow?”

You roll your eyes, trying not to laugh. “Seriously? That’s why you called me?”

“Yes, seriously!” Jason says, leaning forward like he’s trying to peer through the phone. “I need to know if I should be worried about a potential Bengals-Kelce family feud.”

“I’m not even answering that,” you say, shaking your head. “You guys are ridiculous.”

“Okay, okay,” Travis cuts in, holding up his hands. “But just… hypothetically, if you were dating him, what would you say about the guy? Like, first impressions.”

You narrow your eyes at the screen, knowing exactly what he’s trying to do. But you can’t help it—you smirk, your tone deliberately nonchalant. “I mean, hypothetically… he’s not a bad-looking person.”

Both brothers lose it, Jason practically howling with laughter while Travis points dramatically at the camera. “Not a bad-looking person!” he repeats. “That’s all we’re getting?”

You shrug, keeping your expression as deadpan as possible. “I don’t know what you want me to say.”

“Alright, fine,” Jason says, wiping his eyes. “We’ll let you off the hook for now. But just know, we’re watching.”

You laugh, shaking your head as you hang up. But the damage is done—the clip is bound to go viral within hours. And you know the internet will analyze every single word you just said, dissecting it for confirmation that, yes, Joe Burrow and a Kelce sibling are absolutely a thing.

As you sit back on your couch, phone buzzing with texts from friends who caught the livestream, you can’t help but wonder how long you and Joe can keep this secret before it all inevitably comes spilling out. But for now, you smile to yourself, thinking about the way Joe teased you about your brothers earlier that morning. He’d probably find this whole thing hilarious.

—

The off-season brings a rare stretch of peace for both you and Joe, a time when the usual chaos of his schedule fades into long days and quiet nights. You’d been looking forward to the annual Kelce family lake trip all year, a week of boat rides, bonfires, and general shenanigans with your brothers, their partners, and a rotating cast of nieces and nephews. But this time, Joe is here too, woven seamlessly into the fabric of your family life in a way that's both surreal and comforting.

The trip itself is perfect. Joe is surprisingly great at keeping up with the Kelce energy—he plays cornhole with Travis like they’ve been doing it for years, listens patiently to Jason’s never-ending dad stories, and even lets your mom convince him to try her "world-famous" potato salad (a task not taken lightly). Your dad, famously hard to impress, quietly declares Joe "a good kid," which might as well be a five-star review.

The vibe is even more electric this year, thanks to a certain high-profile addition to the Kelce orbit: Taylor Swift. She’d tagged along with Travis, her easy charm and megawatt presence somehow blending seamlessly with your loud, loving family. Taylor and Joe hit it off surprisingly well—you’d caught them once, deep in conversation about some indie band neither of them expected the other to know. And when Taylor found out Joe was a secret Swiftie, she’d teased him mercilessly, promising to quiz him on song lyrics over dinner.

The two of you have been careful so far, sticking to the usual boundaries when phones are out and cameras are snapping. But then comes the moment. The hard launch.

You don’t know he’s planning it. It’s Joe, after all—calm, collected, never one to do anything impulsive without a hundred layers of thought. The picture goes live on his Instagram late in the afternoon, just as the sun is starting to dip below the trees.

The photo is subtle in that effortless, Joe Burrow way, but anyone with eyes can see what it is. It’s a snapshot of the dock, golden light reflecting off the water. You’re sitting with your back to the camera, legs dangling off the edge, wearing an oversized Bengals hoodie that could only belong to one person. Joe’s in the frame too, though only partially—just his legs stretched out next to you, and his hand resting casually on your knee. There’s no caption, just the kind of emoji Joe loves to use, simple and vague—a single wave 🌊

The internet explodes.

You realize it’s out when your phone starts buzzing nonstop, notifications lighting up your screen like fireworks. Group texts, Instagram DMs, Twitter tags—everyone and their mom has an opinion about the post. Your brothers are the first to call.

Joe wanders into the kitchen then, shirtless and still damp from a swim, his hair curling slightly from the lake water. He raises an eyebrow when he sees you on the phone, and you wave him over, switching to speaker.

“Speaking of,” Jason says loudly. “Joey! Nice post, buddy.”

Joe smirks, leaning casually against the counter. “Thanks. Figured it was time.”

“Time?!” Travis is howling now. “You just dropped the most casual ‘we’re dating’ announcement of all time, and all you’ve got is ‘figured it was time’?”

Joe shrugs, unbothered. “Seemed like the right vibe.”

Jason sighs dramatically. “Well, congrats, I guess. You’re officially one of us now.”

“Welcome to the family,” Travis chimes in, still laughing. “But just know, you’re never gonna live this down.”

Joe grins, glancing at you, his expression softening. “I can handle it.”

Later that night, as the two of you sit by the fire, Taylor strumming a guitar nearby while your brothers argue about s’mores ratios, your phone buzzes intermittently with notifications. You can’t help but marvel at how unshaken Joe is by all of it. He just laughs when you bring it up, pulling you closer and resting his chin on your shoulder.

“Let them talk,” he murmurs, pressing a kiss to your temple. “We’ve got nothing to hide anymore.”

And as the fire crackles and your family’s laughter drifts through the night, you realize he’s right. The world knows now, and somehow, it doesn’t feel scary—it feels freeing.

[pbaz7]

ONE SHOT: FULL COURT PRESS

paige x azzi

warning: heavy drinking, suggestive content

word count: 12k

A/N: This was not supposed to be this long and it’s extremely chaotic/all over the place😭. it’s honestly a reflection of my brain. one shots are actually really hard to write and be comfortable with ending lol. they meet in a bar ✨. leave live reacts and comments if you can !!

—————————————————————————

October 2023

Paige was definitely drunk. With each shot she took the weight of everything didn’t seem to press down on her chest as heavy, it all became less suffocating. Basketball used to be her sanctuary, her place of peace. The one thing she could always count to be a breath of fresh air when she felt like she was drowning. But now, every game felt like a tsunami where perfection was the only acceptable outcome for her. She just wanted to feel normal sometimes, even if it was only for one night here and there at random bars.

The dimly lit bar she sat in currently offered the anonymity she craved. Or at least, she hoped it would. She swirled the ice in her glass, completely lost in her thoughts as she was zoned out staring at who knows what, when the door opened the bell catching her attention.

A girl walked in, exuding an effortless confidence that Paige hadn’t seen in a while. Her brown curls framed her striking face, tan skin glowing under the warm light of the bar. She was tall and had a quiet energy about her, the kind that made people take notice without her even trying. Paige found herself staring, immediately captivated, admiring every part of her face that she could see.

So without thinking, she signaled the bartender over. “Whatever she wants, it’s on me.”

The bartender nodded, and a few minutes later, the girl glanced in her direction, lifting her glass with a smile, a dimple popping as she did. At this acknowledgement Paige felt a spark of courage—or maybe it was just the alcohol—as she pushed herself out of her seat. Making her way over to where the girl was sitting.

“I figured I’d come introduce myself. I’m Paige. Paige Bueckers,” she said, licking her lips as she leaned casually against the bar, her usual confidence with women radiating off of her.

The girl smiled, setting her glass down as she extended her hand. “Azzi.”

Paige shook her hand casually brushing Azzi’s hand with her thumb, her blue eyes lingering on Azzi’s for just a beat too long. “Do you have a last name Azzi?”

Azzi’s lips curled into a playful smile. “Fudd. Azzi Fudd.”

Paige licked her lips, keeping her gaze steady as she took her in. “Well, it’s nice to meet you, Azzi Fudd. You’re gorgeous.”

Azzi tilted her head, as she studied Paige before saying. “Thank you superstar.”

Paige blinked, her confident smirk faltering for just a second. “Mmm, so you know who I am?”

Azzi took a slow sip of her drink, her eyes never leaving Paige’s. “Hard to miss in the basketball world. UConn’s golden girl, right?”

Paige chuckled, leaning in slightly as her charm slipped back into place. “Yeah, sure, something like that.” She tilted her head, her curiosity piqued. “What, you hoop?”

Azzi nodded, a small smile tugging at her lips. “I do.”

As Paige stood there the two of them falling into easy introductions, the world outside the bar seemed to be fading away. Azzi’s calm, confident demeanor was a breath of fresh air for Paige who was used to people throwing themselves at her. Azzi didn’t seem fazed by Paige’s notoriety, and her playful confidence kept Paige intrigued.

“So,” Azzi said, her brown eyes having a slight sparkle. “What brings you to a random bar in the middle of nowhere?”

Paige shrugged. “Maybe I needed a quick break. Or maybe I was just waiting for someone like you to walk in.”

Azzi laughed softly, lifting her drink for another sip as her eyes held Paige’s. “Someone like me, huh?”

Paige leaned in just a little, her tongue darting out to lick her lips again. “Yeah. Somebody exactly like you actually.”

Azzi’s gaze flickered down for just a moment before she tilted her head, leaning in slightly, her voice dropping intentionally. “I’m not sure you can handle someone like me.”

​​Paige met her gaze, the tension between them crackling, and without thinking, she let her eyes trail down Azzi’s body, then slowly back up before saying “I’ll be more than happy to show you.”

Azzi noticed the once over, a smile curving her lips as she watched it happen. “I’m not going to sleep with you if that’s what this is.”

Paige smirked, confidence still unwavering. “Who said I wanted to sleep with you?”

Azzi raised an eyebrow. “So, you just buy random girls drinks to chat with them?”

Paige hummed at this. “Touché…so what is it? I’m not your type?”

This time, Azzi’s gaze swept over Paige, pausing for just a beat longer than expected near her exposed abdomen before she replied, her voice low. “Mmm, I didn’t say that.”

At this, Paige's lips eased into another smile as she leaned closer. “Why not then?”

Azzi shrugged, her demeanor calm, even as her eyes stayed locked on Paige’s. “I don’t do one-night stands.”

Paige tilted her head, her smirk softening into something more genuine. “Who said it had to be just one night?”

Azzi let out a soft laugh, shaking her head. “I also don’t sleep with someone I just met.”

Paige with her elbows resting on the bar said, “Ahh ok..so, what’s the rule? Three dates? Five? I need to fill out an application?”

Azzi glanced up at Paige through her eyelashes, resting her cheek in her hand as she replied. “You’re really persistent.”

Paige’s smile widened as she looked at Azzi before saying, “It’s not every day I come across somebody as gorgeous as you.”

Azzi’s gaze lingered on Paige, the air between them a little heavy now. Her eyes flickered between Paige’s blue ones and her lips, a silent tension building as she tapped her finger lightly on the bar.

After a moment, Azzi leaned back, breaking the spell with a soft smile. “Let’s start with a conversation that doesn’t involve you trying to charm your way into something.”

Paige pretended to look offended. “Charm? This is just me being me.”

Azzi gave her a pointed look, though her smile remained. “And that’s what makes you dangerous.”

Paige’s grin widened. “You say dangerous like it’s a bad thing.”

Azzi shrugged, leaning back slightly. “Maybe I think it is…Or maybe I just want to keep you on your toes. You seem like the type who needs to be entertained.”

Paige raised an eyebrow, her voice dropping just enough to hold a playful edge. “Careful, Azzi. You’re starting to sound interested.”

Azzi smirked, her gaze still locked on Paige’s. “Never said I wasn’t. Just that you’re not going to charm your way into skipping the line.”

Paige hummed, leaning in slightly. “So there’s a line?”

Azzi chuckled, her tone teasing Paige now. “Maybe.”

Paige smiles saying, “Good thing I’m competitive. I can play the long game when it’s worth it”

Azzi chuckled softly, her eyes flickering with amusement. “That’s good to know.”

Paige smiled, a playful challenge in her eyes. “Guess I should sit down and get to know you then.”

Azzi gestured to the seat next to her, the corners of her mouth twitching upward. “Guess so.”

After this their conversation flowed effortlessly, covering everything from basketball to life outside the spotlight. Azzi talked about her experience playing for a smaller college, how she loved the game without the added pressure of constant media attention, though she still got some here and there. Paige found herself completely captivated by the stranger, sharing stories and laughing until her stomach hurt. She completely forgot about what made her show up to the bar in the first place.

Hours passed without either of them noticing. Drinks flowed between both of them, Paige making Azzi never paid for anything. By the time Paige glanced at her phone, it was nearly 2 a.m.

“Damn,” she said, shaking her head. “I didn’t realize how late it was.”

Azzi smiled at her. “Time flies when you’re having fun, huh?”

Paige chuckled, a playful edge to her voice. “Who said I was having fun?”

Azzi tilted her head, a hint of tipsiness creeping into her expression as she studied Paige. “You didn’t have fun with me?”

Paige smirked at Azzi’s tone, her blue eyes a little glossy from her drinks. “We could have a lot more fun if you stop playing hard to get.”

Azzi’s lips curved into a smile. “I’m sure we could, but I’m not that easy.”

Paige’s eyebrows lifted, her confidence undeterred. “Like I said, I’m up for the challenge.”

Azzi tilted her head, her gaze meeting Paige’s with a spark of amusement. “Are you now?”

“Absolutely” Paige said simply as she reached for her phone, a sly grin on her lips as she began to unlock it but before she could speak again, Azzi leaned forward speaking to the bartender, catching Paige's attention.

“Excuse me,” Azzi said, glancing at the bartender. “Mind if I borrow a pen?”

The bartender passed her a pen, and without missing a beat, Azzi reached for Paige’s hand, her fingers brushing lightly over Paige’s skin as she began writing her number on the palm of her hand.

Paige watched, amusement flickering in her eyes. When Azzi finished, she glanced down at the number and then met Azzi’s gaze, laughing slightly. “You could’ve just put it in my phone, you know.”

Azzi capped the pen with a smile, standing up as she put on her jacket. “I could’ve, but this leaves more of an impression.”

She leaned in just slightly, her breath warm against Paige’s ear as she added, “And I want to make sure you’re still thinking of me in the morning.”

With that, Azzi straightened up, her eyes sparkling as she gave Paige one last lingering look before walking out of the bar.

Paige sat there, staring after her, a wide smile spreading across her face as she realized she was grinning like an idiot.

As she walked out into the cool air herself, Paige couldn’t help but smile. Tonight, she hadn’t been the golden girl, the star player, or the media’s favorite headline. She’d just been Paige, and she liked who she’d met along the way.

…

Over the next few weeks, Paige and Azzi fell into an effortless rhythm. Their phones rarely stayed silent, a constant stream of texts flowing between them from morning until night.

Dimples : What’s your pre-game ritual?

Superstar: Wouldn’t you like to know?

Dimples : I would, actually. I bet it’s something super intense like staring at a basketball for an hour to try to absorb its energy.

Superstar: Lmao. You always think you’re so funny.

Dimples : No denial though, huh? Interesting…

Between the teasing texts, there were long, late-night phone calls where their conversations would drift from basketball to their favorite movies, and childhood stories. Of course Paige made sure she flirted in between.

Paige often found herself lying in bed, the sound of Azzi’s laughter filling her ears through the speaker. “Wait, so you’re telling me you tried to dunk on your brother at eight years old?” Paige asked, barely holding back her own laugh as she tried to hear the story.

“Hey, I had big dreams!” Azzi replied. “Did I fail miserably? Yes. Did I get grounded for breaking the hoop? Also yes.”

“I need to see baby Azzi with big hoop dreams,” Paige teased.

“I’ll show you if you admit that I’d beat you in a one-on-one,” Azzi quipped back.

“That’s never happening,” Paige retorted, her grin so wide it hurt.

The banter always came naturally, but beyond the jokes, there were quieter, more vulnerable moments. Paige always claiming that nobody get’s her but Azzi as she poured out her feelings about basketball and how she didn’t really love it as much anymore.

But one evening, Azzi sent Paige a clip of her latest game with a message: Tell me what you think.

Paige opened the video and immediately dialed her number.

“Alright,” Paige began as soon as Azzi picked up. “Your footwork on that first drive? Chef’s kiss. But…”

“But?” Azzi prompted, a smile in her voice.

“You hesitated for a second on that three in the second quarter. You had more than enough space Azzi.”

Azzi sighed. “I know. I over-thought it.”

They stayed on the phone for hours, analyzing plays, discussing Azzi’s positioning, and even breaking down potential opponents going forward. Paige’s passion for the game peaked through the conversation, and Azzi soaked it all in, listening intently with a huge smile on her face hearing an unusual excitement in Paige’s voice as she talked about basketball.

At one point, Paige teased, “Maybe I should just be your coach.”

Azzi laughed. “Or maybe you could just transfer and come help us win. Imagine the headlines.”

Paige’s voice dropped into a softer, more teasing tone. “You just want me around more.”

“Maybe I do,” Azzi replied, the playful edge in her voice unmistakable.

When they weren’t buried in film, their in-person meetups were filled with just as much energy. Sitting in a booth at another quiet bar, Paige and Azzi leaned in close, the low hum of conversation buzzing around them.

Paige smirked, her eyes sparkling with mischief. “So, when are you finally going to admit that I have game?”

Azzi tilted her head, pretending to think it over. “Ehh, I don’t know. You’re more of a fast-break kind of girl—you had a strong start, but you don’t seem to have the stamina to finish. You’ve been slacking lately.”

Paige dropped her jaw, feigning offense. “Wowww. So now you’re questioning my follow-through?”

Azzi grinned, shrugging. “I’m just saying, I’m not easily impressed.”

“Oh, I’ve noticed,” Paige shot back. “But you keep showing up, so I must be doing something right.”

Azzi chuckled, shaking her head. “Is that line supposed to impress me?”

“Is it working?” Paige’s voice was low but still confident.

Azzi’s eyes twinkled. “Maybe.”

The line between playful flirting and genuine connection blurred more each time they were together. Azzi became Paige’s sounding board, someone she could spill her feelings to; her safe space. And with every interaction, Paige felt herself being pulled deeper into Azzi’s orbit.

…

December 2023

The glow of Paige’s phone screen lit up her dark room as she sat on the edge of her bed, her fingers scrolling through endless tweets and headlines. Paige Bueckers chokes again. Overhyped and underwhelming. She’ll never live up to the UConn legends before her.

Her heart raced as she read the brutal critiques. The game hadn’t even been bad. They’d won, she’d put up solid numbers, but the narrative didn’t care about solid. Anything less than perfection was failure in their eyes. And now, the relentless noise echoed in her mind.

She’ll never lead UConn to a championship.

She doesn’t deserve to go high in the draft.

Just another overrated star.

The pressure mounted, her chest tightening with every thought. Her breathing grew a little shallow, and her hands trembled as she gripped her phone. It felt like her ribcage was collapsing in on itself, each breath harder to take.

She squeezed her eyes shut, trying to force the panic away. She needed air, needed something—someone.

As if the universe heard her silent plea, her phone rang. Azzi’s name flashed across the screen, the sight alone lifting some weight off of Paige’s chest. Her hand trembled slightly as she swiped to answer.

“Wassup, pretty,” Paige said, her voice shaky but laced with soft flirtation.

Azzi let out a light laugh on the other end, her voice warm. “I can tell you’re overthinking just by your voice Paige.” She paused, letting the words sink in before adding, “I watched your game—you played great.”

Paige exhaled, a mix of disbelief and self-doubt slipping into her tone. “Eh.”

“Eh, my ass,” Azzi shot back without hesitation. “What are you doing?”

Paige took a deep breath, glancing around her quiet room. “Nothing. Just thinking.”

Azzi’s voice softened. “You think too much. You’re gonna give that pretty face of yours wrinkles before you’re 30.”

“I know,” Paige admitted, a faint smile tugging at her lips despite the heaviness in her chest.

“How do you wanna play it tonight?” Azzi asked gently, her question open but filled with understanding.

Paige hesitated for a moment, then sighed, her voice quieter this time. “I miss you.”

Azzi didn’t hesitate. “I miss you more. You wanna talk about it?”

Paige nodded even though Azzi couldn’t see her, her voice steadying just slightly. “Yeah. I do.”

Before Azzi could ask another question Paige said,. “Do you have practice tomorrow?”

“No, why?” Azzi replied, a hint of curiosity in her tone.

Paige hesitated for only a moment before asking, “Do you wanna come over?”

Azzi didn’t need to think long. “It’ll take me some time.”

“That’s fine,” Paige said softly, her voice tinged with relief.

“Ok,” Azzi said, already moving. “Tell me what’s wrong while I get my stuff together.”

Paige let out a shaky sigh. “It’s just… I can’t stop thinking about what they’re saying. That I’ll never be good enough. That I don’t deserve this.”

Azzi’s tone shifted as she put her phone on speaker to talk as she gathered some things she needed. “You’ve already proven so much. You’re one of the best, and anyone who actually has a brain and knows basketball can see that. The rest? They’re just noise. And we both know you’re more than that.”

Paige felt a lump rise in her throat, but a small smile tugged at her lips. “You always have a counterpoint to anything I say.”

“Of course I do,” Azzi teased lightly. “It’s part of my charm. Now keep going.”

Paige nodded, her voice steadier now as she began to open up, the comfort of Azzi’s presence—even from afar—slowly quieting the storm in her mind.

When Azzi arrived, Paige opened the door, pulling her into a hug that was everything Paige needed in that moment. Paige held on a little longer than usual, her grip tight as if Azzi might slip away. Azzi just rested her chin briefly on Paige’s shoulder, allowing her all the time she needed, before Paige finally pulled back.

“Thanks for coming,” Paige said quietly, her voice tinged with a little vulnerability.

Azzi gave her a small, reassuring smile. “Of course.”

Paige guided Azzi into the living room, where the familiar hum of laughter and chatter filled the space. KK and Ice were sprawled on the couch arguing about something, while Nika sat cross-legged in the armchair, her phone in hand. Aubrey leaned against the wall, lazily tossing a small ball into the air. The TV was paused on a game, though it was clear they hadn’t been paying much attention.

“Aye,” Paige began, keeping a steady hand on Azzi’s back. “This is Azzi.”

Ice gave her a friendly wave, her usual laid-back demeanor with anyone but Paige and KK evident. “Hey, it’s nice to finally meet you,” she said with a smile.

Nika glanced up, a smirk already forming. “Azzi, huh?” she said, dragging the name out teasingly. “Paige talks about you all the time.”

Aubrey gave a quiet laugh, offering a small nod. “Wassup Azzi,” she said, her tone kind although she didn’t say much else.

KK, on the other hand, wasted no time leaning forward with her trademark grin. “Girly pop, you’re way too pretty for her,” she teased, pointing a finger toward Paige.

Before anyone could react, Ice smacked KK’s arm, shaking her head. “Really, KK? Read the room.”

Paige rolled her eyes, brushing off the comment, though a faint blush crept up her neck. “Ignore her,” she muttered, looking at Azzi.

Azzi chuckled softly, her warm gaze flickering between everyone. “It’s nice to meet you guys in person,” she said smoothly.

Paige, ready to retreat from the chaos, gently tugged Azzi’s hand. “Let’s go to my room,” she said, her tone soft but insistent.

Azzi gave a small wave to the group. “See you guys later,” she said, her voice laced with light amusement at the team as she followed Paige down the hallway.

Once inside Paige’s room, the tension from earlier seemed to dissipate. The familiar scent of vanilla and a faint hint of lavender filled the air, and Azzi kicked off her sneakers by the door, glancing around the cozy space. Paige’s bed was unmade, a mix of fluffy pillows and a purple comforter that looked as if it had been hastily thrown back in place.

Azzi smiled faintly, dropping her bag by the dresser before moving to sit on the edge of the bed. She leaned back on her hands, her gaze following Paige as she plopped onto the mattress beside her, remote in hand.

“So,” Paige began, scrolling through Netflix, the soft glow of the TV casting flickering shadows on the walls. “What are you in the mood for? Something funny? Scary? A rom-com?”

Azzi raised an eyebrow. “Rom-com? Is that your go-to move when you have somebody here?”

Paige snorted, rolling her eyes as she kept scrolling. “Please, I don’t need a movie to impress you.”

“Oh, really?” Azzi teased, shifting to sit cross-legged on the bed. “Then why are you trying so hard to pick the perfect movie?”

Paige paused her scrolling to glance over at her. “I’m not trying hard. I’m just being considerate of my company.”

“Sure you are,” Azzi replied, her voice laced with amusement. She reached out, playfully nudging Paige’s arm.

Paige chuckled, turning her attention back to the screen. “Alright, what about this one?” she asked, landing on an action movie.

Azzi tilted her head, pretending to deliberate. “Eh, too much testosterone,” she joked.

Paige huffed dramatically, tossing the remote onto the bed and leaning back against the headboard. “You’re impossible, you know that?”

Azzi grinned, leaning back beside her, their shoulders brushing now. “So you’ve said but still, here you are, inviting me over and trying to impress me.”

Paige shook her head, a laugh slipping out as she grabbed her phone from the nightstand. “You’re annoying.”

Azzi just smiled, watching Paige scroll through her phone for a moment. “You good now?” she asked softly, her tone shifting to something gentler as she hints at what they were talking about a while ago.

Paige glanced at her, the teasing smirk fading into something more sincere. “Yeah,” she said after a moment. “Thanks for coming.”

Azzi’s smile softened, her eyes meeting Paige’s. “You don’t have to thank me,” she said quietly.

For a moment, neither of them said anything. The room was quiet, save for the faint hum of the TV and the occasional muffled laughter from the living room. It wasn’t awkward, though—it was comfortable, the kind of silence that felt more like understanding than absence.

Paige nudged Azzi’s knee with her own. “You pick the movie, since you’re so picky.”

Azzi laughed, reaching for the remote. “Alright, but no complaints if it’s a rom-com.”

Paige laughs saying “I’ll definitely laugh at you but sure.”

Azzi finally settled on a comedy, something light enough to keep playing in the background but not too distracting. She set the remote down with a triumphant smile and leaned back against the headboard.

“See? No rom-com,” she teased, shooting a smug look at Paige.

Paige smirked, turning her body slightly to face Azzi. “I’m impressed. You got range.”

Azzi tilted her head, her smile softening. “What can I say? I like to keep people guessing.”

The movie began, but neither of them seemed to care much about the witty banter on-screen. Instead, their attention shifted entirely to each other. Paige’s fingers absentmindedly played with the hem of her hoodie as she leaned in just enough to close the space between them slightly.

“What else should I know about you, Azzi Fudd?”

Azzi chuckled, her gaze dipping briefly to Paige’s lips before flicking back up. “I’m not that mysterious. I think you’ve got me all figured out by now.”

Paige leaned in a bit closer, her elbow resting on the pillow between them. “Not even close,” she said, her voice quieter now, a touch more serious.

“Alright, then. Ask me something.”

Paige raised an eyebrow, pretending to consider it as her fingers idly tapped against her leg. “Okay. What’s your biggest pet peeve?”

Azzi laughed, leaning back slightly. “Oh, that’s easy. People who chew with their mouths open.”

Paige laughed too, her nose scrunching adorably. “That’s fair. What about…” She paused, her tone shifting to something more playful. “Biggest turn-on?”

Azzi’s eyebrows shot up, and she gave Paige a pointed look. “Very smooth transition, Paige.”

Paige grinned, unapologetic. “What can I say? I’ve been curious.”

Azzi bit her lip, her gaze steady as she considered her response. “Confidence,” she said finally. “Someone who knows what they want.”

Paige’s smirk widened, and she leaned in just enough to blur the line between teasing and daring. “Good to know,” she murmured, her blue eyes locked on Azzi’s.

Azzi tilted her head, a playful glint in her eyes as she studied Paige. “Alright, your turn. What’s your most embarrassing moment?”

Paige groaned, covering her face with one hand. “Oh, that’s not fair. There are way too many to choose from.”

Azzi laughed softly, nudging Paige’s leg with her foot. “Come on, just one. I promise not to laugh... too much.”

Paige peeked at her through her fingers, her lips twitching. “Fine. When I was in high school, I was running and I tripped trying to jump over the hurdle. Full-on faceplant in front of the whole crowd.”

Azzi burst out laughing, her hand flying to her chest. “Please tell me there’s a video of that.”

“There probably is,” Paige admitted, laughing along with her. “But good luck finding it.”

Azzi shook her head, her laughter tapering off as her gaze softened. “Okay, that’s not so bad. At least you owned it.”

Paige leaned back, crossing her arms with a mock pout. “Your turn to embarrass yourself, then. What’s something you did that you wish you could forget?”

Azzi smiled slyly, her voice dropping just a touch. “I really don’t get embarrassed easily. But...” She hesitated, her eyes flicking to Paige’s lips for a split second before meeting her gaze again. “I have been caught staring at someone a little too long before.”

Paige raised an eyebrow, her smirk creeping back. “Oh, really? Who’s the lucky someone?”

Azzi’s smile grew, and she leaned in slightly, her voice smooth as she tried to move things along. “Well, right now, it’s you.”

Paige raised an eyebrow, her tone laced with curiosity and a hint of teasing. “Right now? So, who was it another time?”

Azzi chuckled, shaking her head. “Oh, no, it’s not like that. The other time was a complete misunderstanding. I got lost in thought, I wasn't even looking at the person, but they thought I was checking them out.”

Paige’s lips twitched into a smirk. “Ahh, got you. So, you accidentally made someone’s day, huh?”

Azzi laughed softly, her eyes flickering with amusement as she looked at Paige. “Something like that. But this time, no misunderstandings. I know exactly what I’m looking at.”

Paige tilted her head, her gaze holding Azzi’s. “And what are you looking at?”

Azzi leaned in slightly, her voice dropping a notch. “Someone who swears she’s hard to fluster but has been blushing for the past five minutes.”

Paige felt the warmth creep up her cheeks, but she didn’t break eye contact, her confidence undeterred. “I’m just giving you the satisfaction. Didn’t want you to think you weren’t having an effect.”

Azzi grinned, her tongue brushing over her bottom lip. “Oh, don’t worry. I already know I am.”

Paige leaned back slightly, resting her weight on her hands. “Confident, aren’t you?”

Azzi mirrored her movement, leaning back as well, her eyes gleaming. “I’d say it’s justified. What do you think?”

Paige’s gaze flickered down to Azzi’s lips for a brief moment before meeting her eyes again. “I think you like to keep me on my toes.”

Azzi’s smirk deepened. “You’re telling me you don’t enjoy it?”

The air between them felt a little charged now, their playful exchange laced with unspoken tension. Paige tilted her head, “I didn’t say that.”

Azzi’s gaze dropped to the string of Paige’s hoodie, grabbing it to twist it slowly around her finger as the air between them shifted. Her voice softened. “You know, I’ve been thinking about something.”

Paige raised an eyebrow, leaning slightly closer, her attention fixed on Azzi. “What’s that?”

Azzi glanced up, her eyes locking onto Paige’s. “You’re the one who keeps saying how much fun we could have. But…” She let the word hang in the air, her fingers releasing the string and brushing lightly against Paige’s chest. “You haven’t even tried to kiss me.”

Paige blinked, her breath catching for a moment before a slow smirk tugged at her lips. “You’re the one who stopped us last time, remember? Told me I needed to figure my stuff out first.”

Azzi tilted her head, her voice growing softer, almost challenging. “That was a month ago, Paige. Don’t tell me you’re still waiting for permission.”

Paige smirked as she leaned closer, their faces inches apart. “So I take it there’s no line anymore?”

Azzi let out a soft chuckle, her gaze steady. “Paige, the line was gone as soon as you sat next to me at that bar.”

Something shifted in Paige’s expression—her smirk fading into something more serious, more intent. Without another word, she reached out, her hand cupping Azzi’s jaw with a gentle firmness. She held her there for a moment, their eyes locking as if waiting for any sign of hesitation.

When none came, Paige leaned in, closing the distance as her lips brushed against Azzi’s in a slow kiss. Azzi exhaled softly through her nose, her hand finding its way to Paige’s hoodie, gripping the fabric as she leaned into the kiss, melting into the moment.

Paige, emboldened by Azzi’s response, slid her hands to Azzi’s waist, effortlessly pulling her into her lap. Azzi let out a quiet sound at this but didn’t pull away, her arms wrapping around Paige’s neck as their kiss deepened. The air between them grew heavier, the couple of months of tension dissolving.

After some time, Azzi finally broke the kiss, her forehead resting against Paige’s as she caught her breath. Her lips curved into a small smirk, but there was a flicker of curiosity in her eyes. “Should I be concerned at how good you are at this?”

Paige laughed softly, her hands settling on Azzi’s hips as she shook her head. “Nope. Not at all.”

For a moment, Azzi’s gaze faltered, a brief flicker of hesitation crossing her face, but it was gone as quickly as it appeared. Without saying anything else, she leaned back in, her hands cupping Paige’s jaw as she pulled her into another kiss, this one a little more sloppy, filled with the kind of urgency that had been building between them for months.

As the kiss deepened, Paige’s hands roamed Azzi’s sides, her thumbs brushing over the bare skin just above her waistband. The heat between them grew quickly, and when Azzi’s hands tugged slightly at Paige’s hoodie, Paige took the cue immediately. She pulled it off in one smooth motion, leaving her in just a sports bra. Azzi followed without hesitation, peeling her shirt off and tossing it aside before their lips met again.

The contact of skin against skin heightened the tension, and Paige wasted no time shifting their position. She slid her hands beneath Azzi, lifting her off her lap and laying her down against the bed. Hovering over her, Paige’s blue eyes locked on Azzi’s, searching for any sign of doubt. But all she saw was anticipation, the flicker of trust and desire that had been simmering between them.

Paige leaned down, her lips brushing over Azzi’s once more before trailing a path down her jawline, then lower, pressing slow, deliberate kisses along the curve of her neck. Azzi’s breath hitched, her fingers tangling in Paige’s hair as her body arched slightly beneath her, silently encouraging her.

Paige’s lips pressed against Azzi’s neck with a renewed intensity, her hands roaming Azzi’s body more freely as she left soft marks on her skin. Azzi’s breath came in shallow gasps, her fingers tightening in Paige’s hair, urging her on. The sensation of Paige’s lips leaving heated trails across her neck made Azzi’s chest rise and fall in a quick rhythm, and she couldn't help but vocalize her pleasure. “Fuck, you’re good at this,” Azzi murmured, the words only spurring Paige on.

As Paige continued, inching lower to Azzi’s chest, she could feel Azzi’s body tremble slightly beneath her, her pulse racing. Azzi’s hands moved to Paige’s shoulders, a firm grip on her as she suddenly pulled Paige up to meet her lips in a desperate, heated kiss. Azzi broke it after a few seconds, pulling back just enough to catch her breath.

“Your teammates are here,” Azzi said softly, a hint of amusement in her voice but also a recognition of the reality they were both avoiding.

Paige, barely taking a moment to breathe, flashed a smile. “The walls are thick.”

Azzi raised an eyebrow at her, a teasing glint in her eyes. “You sure?”

Paige laughed softly, brushing her lips over Azzi's neck as she whispered, “I swear,” her voice low and filled with a mischievous edge as she went back to kissing Azzi’s neck.

As she kissed down her neck again, Azzi’s breath caught, her body reacting everytime Paige’s warm lips sucked on her neck. She let out a soft moan, her fingers threading into Paige’s hair, pulling her closer. “Fuck, okay,” she gasped, her voice trembling slightly with the intensity of the moment.

Azzi's eyes fluttered shut, trying to keep control, but it was becoming harder with every kiss, every stroke of Paige's lips against her skin. She exhaled sharply, shaking her head slightly, whispering, “I’m still going to be quiet, though.”

Paige nodded against her, her lips brushing just below Azzi’s sports bra, a soft hum of agreement escaping her. She was about to lower herself again when—knock knock.

Paige groaned softly, dropping her forehead to Azzi’s stomach in frustration. "Please, no," she muttered under her breath.

The knock came again, this time firmer, more insistent.

Azzi chuckled softly, a breathy laugh escaping her as she ran her fingers through Paige’s hair, her smile still teasing despite the interruption.

Paige groaned, reluctantly sitting up and adjusting her sweats that were hanging low on her hips. She threw a quick glance at Azzi, giving her an apologetic smile before getting up to answer the door.

She cracked it open just enough to keep Azzi out of view. On the other side stood Ayanna, looking a little awkward. She glanced up and down Paige’s figure before pausing, her eyes widening when she realized what Paige had been in the middle of. "Oh shit, sorry," Ayanna blurted out laughing a little. "I didn’t know you were... busy."

Paige laughed softly, rolling her eyes. "It’s fine, Yanna. Wassup?"

Ayanna gave a grin, still standing there awkwardly. "I just wanted to borrow one of your chains... the long silver one?" she asked, her eyes flicking to the jewelry box that sat on a nearby shelf.

Paige nodded and stepped aside, making room for Ayanna to enter. She walked over to her large jewelry box, pulling it open to search for the chain. "Sure," Paige muttered, her voice still tinged with a bit of frustration from the interrupted moment.

As Ayanna stepped in, she glanced over at Azzi, who was still laying on the bed, a playful grin curling on her lips. "Hey, uh, I’m Ayanna. Sorry for interrupting," she apologized, raising a hand in greeting.

Azzi’s laughter rang out as she shot Ayanna a look. "Don’t worry about it," she said, her voice light.

Ayanna looked between the two of them, eyes lingering the clear marks Paige left. She paused for a second, her lips quirking into a grin as she nodded toward the bed. "Seems like you two were having a good time," she said, a knowing glint in her eyes.

Paige couldn’t help but chuckle at the subtle remark. "We were," she admitted, shooting Azzi a quick glance as she found the chain Ayanna had asked for. "But I guess it’ll have to wait." She handed the chain over to Ayanna, who accepted it with a grateful nod.

"Thanks," Ayanna said, giving both of them a sheepish smile. "I’ll leave you two to it. Don’t want to get in the way."

Paige gave her a smile, relieved that she could now finally get back to Azzi. "No problem," she said with a slight chuckle. "See you later."

As Ayanna left, closing the door softly behind her, Paige turned back to Azzi with a sly grin, her eyes still a little dark. She crossed the room and climbed back onto the bed, settling on top of Azzi once more.

"Now," Paige murmured, leaning down to capture Azzi's lips in a slow kiss, "where were we?"

Azzi’s hands found their way to Paige’s waist as she returned the kiss, the tension between them building again. But just as the moment began to intensify, Azzi gently pressed a hand against Paige’s shoulder, breaking the kiss with a soft laugh.

Paige blinked, confused. "What’s wrong?"

Azzi bit her lip, her cheeks tinted pink as she chuckled. "That was the universe trying to save me from the embarrassment of your team hearing me," she teased, her voice light but carrying a hint of sincerity.

Paige groaned dramatically, burying her face in Azzi’s neck before muttering, "The universe hates me." With a reluctant sigh, she pushed herself off of Azzi and flopped down beside her, one arm draping over Azzi’s stomach as she stared at the ceiling.

Azzi turned her head to look at Paige, her teasing smirk softening into something more affectionate. “You know,” she said, brushing a strand of hair from Paige’s face, “I’ve learned something about you.”

Paige raised an eyebrow. “Oh yeah? What’s that?”

Azzi grinned, “You’re pretty dramatic.”

Paige huffed out a laugh, tilting her head toward Azzi. “I’m allowed to be dramatic—it’s been a long day.”

Azzi chuckled at this, leaning in to press a soft kiss to Paige’s cheek. “Fair enough,” she murmured. Reaching over, she grabbed the remote from where it lay forgotten on the bed.

“Alright,” Azzi said, settling back against the pillows. “Let’s find something we’ll actually watch this time.”

Paige smiled, her body relaxing as she shifted closer to Azzi, the moment between them now filled with a comforting ease.

…

January 2024

Paige had always been used to the spotlight, the constant expectations and scrutiny from the media. But after a recent game—one that, in her mind, had gone just fine—she was overwhelmed by the pressure. The game had been solid, not spectacular, but because she didn’t score 30, the media called it a "bad game." The headlines came fast, and her phone blew up with comments about how she didn’t deserve her projected draft position, how she would never be the one to lead UConn to a championship.

She drowned her frustration in alcohol at the bar where she and Azzi had met months ago. Paige absolutely hated feeling this way, lost in the opinions of others, feeling disconnected from her own love for the game. She ordered round after round, ignoring the warm buzz at the back of her mind as she tried to numb the constant spiral of negative thoughts.

Azzi had been texting Paige all night, but Paige had ignored the messages. She wanted to be left alone with her thoughts, no matter how dark they were, no matter how awful they made her feel.

At some point during the night, Azzi showed up. She had been worried when Paige’s messages stopped coming, and after doing a quick glance at socials she had a feeling Paige would be at the bar. Finding her slumped over at a corner table, nearly incoherent from the alcohol, Azzi rushed over, concerned. She managed to get Paige into her car and back to her place, basically carrying her to her room.

The room is dim, the only light coming from a lamp in the corner, casting long shadows across the floor. Paige stumbles as Azzi helps her sit on the edge of the bed, her movements slow and unsteady from the alcohol. Her face is flushed, her hair messy, and her eyes, though half-lidded with drunken exhaustion, are filled with something deeper—something darker, Paige looked broken.

Azzi pulls the blankets over her, but Paige swats them away, too restless, too tangled in her own thoughts.

"Azzi..." Paige’s voice is slurred. She lifts her head, locking eyes with Azzi. "I don’t even care anymore. About any of this." She gestures vaguely, her hand trembling slightly, as if the words themselves are heavy. "Basketball. The fans. The media. All of it. It doesn't matter. It never will. I hate it now Az.

Azzi, who had been sitting beside her, quietly watching Paige’s descent, let out a soft sigh. She watches Paige closely, trying to gauge if she’s speaking from the weight of the alcohol or if this is something deeper—something Paige can’t suppress anymore.

But Paige’s next words slice through the haze of drunkenness with a clarity that leaves Azzi speechless and heartbroken for the girl she’s grown to care about so much.

"My mom… she won’t even look at me if I’m not perfect." Paige's voice cracks on the last word, and her eyes well up, her vision blurring as she blinks hard. She doesn’t try to hide it. "If I don’t score enough, if I don’t win enough, if I’m not the best, she… she won’t even talk to me. It’s like I don’t exist unless I’m this… this thing she made me out to be." Her hands are shaking now, her chest tight, breath hitching as she speaks faster, more urgently. "I hate it. I hate how everyone just looks at me like I’m some fucking… machine that’s supposed to perform. I hate that I don’t even know who I am without all of it. Without the games, without the applause, without the pressure. I’m just… nothing."

Her voice breaks as she lets out a small sob, her body trembling as the weight of her own words crashes over her. Paige tilts her head back, staring at the ceiling, trying to steady her breathing, trying to hold herself together.

Azzi sat frozen for a moment, her chest tightening as she listened to Paige’s words. The rawness in her voice, the cracks of vulnerability that Paige so rarely let show, cut deeper than anything Azzi had ever heard. Without thinking, she reached out, her hand finding Paige’s and gripping it tightly, grounding her.

"That’s not true," Azzi replies softly, her voice steady but warm. "You're not a 'nothing' to me. You’re someone who’s hurting. And that’s okay. It’s okay to hurt." She lowers her gaze to the floor for a moment, gathering her thoughts. When she speaks again, her voice is firmer, more certain. "You don’t have to be perfect. You’re allowed to be flawed. We all are. I know what it’s like, feeling like you’re not enough—like you’ll never be enough, no matter how hard you try."

Paige’s gaze drifts downward, her thoughts swimming in a haze of alcohol and self-doubt. She looks up at Azzi, but her words come out bitter, a defense mechanism against the intense emotions bubbling just below the surface.

"You wouldn’t even entertain me if I wasn’t who I am," Paige mutters, almost too quietly for Azzi to hear. "I’m just a player on a pedestal. If I wasn’t who I am—if I was just… me—you wouldn’t even be here right now. You wouldn’t have talked to me that night.”

The words sting, hanging in the air like a cold weight. Azzi’s heart skips a beat, the sharp edge of Paige’s insecurity cutting deeper than she expected. She doesn’t respond immediately, unsure if the alcohol has distorted Paige's perception or if there’s truth in the words that sting too much to ignore.

For a long moment, Azzi simply watches Paige, her expression softening. Despite the hurt she feels from the insinuation, she knows this is just another layer of Paige’s pain speaking through her, the doubt and loneliness that plague her when she’s this vulnerable.

Azzi leans in slowly, and without saying a word, presses a gentle kiss to Paige’s cheek. It’s soft—like a quiet reassurance, an act of comfort without expectation. Paige’s eyes flutter, and she flinches just slightly, as though the unexpected touch has made her feel something she wasn’t prepared for, a softness she hasn’t felt in a while. So she doesn’t pull away.

Azzi pulls back just enough to meet her eyes, her voice gentle but firm. "That couldn’t be further from the truth and you know that Paige. You’re drunk so we’re not going to talk about this tonight."

Paige opens her mouth to say something, but the words never come. Instead, she sinks back into the bed, her body limp from the weight of the alcohol and the emotions swirling inside her.

Azzi stands, her heart still aching for Paige, but knowing the best thing she can do right now is give her space. She takes a deep breath, turns away, and heads toward the door.

"Get some rest," Azzi says softly, her voice like a whisper in the quiet room. "You don’t have to figure all of this out tonight. Just sleep, Paige."

Without another word, she leaves the room, closing the door behind her with a soft click. Paige can hear her footsteps down the hallway, moving further away. When she lies back against the pillows, the room feels impossibly empty.

Azzi settles down on the couch in the living room, the silence between them thick and unresolved. She pulls a blanket over her, eyes closed but unable to drift into sleep. There’s so much she wants to say to Paige, so much she wants to reassure her of. But right now, all she can do is wait—wait for Paige to come to terms with her own truth, and for herself to figure out how to be there when Paige is ready to hear it.

Azzi exhales softly into the dark, wishing she could fix it all, but knowing that this journey is one Paige has to take on her own.

The next morning, Paige wakes up with a splitting headache, her heart racing with the sudden realization of figuring out where she was. Paige groaned, pressing her palms against her temples as the pounding in her head intensified. The faint morning light streaming through the blinds felt like a spotlight, amplifying her discomfort. “Fuck, please no,” she muttered hoarsely, her voice scratchy and weak. Her heart raced slightly as she tried to piece together the events of the night before.

Where the hell am I? What did I do? The questions spiraled, sending a wave of nausea through her as flashes of the bar, the drinks, and her overwhelming feelings surfaced. A cold knot of dread formed in her chest.

Fuck Did I… do something? With someone that wasn’t… The thought made her stomach churn, guilt clawing at her even though she and Azzi weren’t technically together. Her memories were blurry, but the fear lingered, and she refused to let herself sink deeper into the pit of self-loathing.

Forcing her heavy limbs to cooperate, Paige shifted slightly, scanning her surroundings.

She glanced around the room, disoriented, before spotting the familiar art on the wall—the same art she had seen the few times she’d been here and Azzi had shown her during their first few Facetime calls. She exhaled in relief, but the sense of discomfort didn’t fade. Her mind raced with confusion about the night’s events. Her body felt heavy, sore, and her brain buzzed with the aftermath of the alcohol.

She noticed a glass of water and a bottle of painkillers on the dresser and quickly took the water, hoping to ease the pounding in her skull. She shuffled toward the kitchen, the faint sound of sizzling drawing her in. As she stepped into the doorway, she saw Azzi standing at the stove, her back turned as she carefully flipped something in a pan. The familiar sight should have put Paige at ease, but something was off. Azzi’s movements, usually fluid and unhurried, were now methodical, almost stiff.

Paige’s lips parted to speak, but she hesitated, unsure how to bridge the gap between them. Instead, she moved forward, wrapping her arms loosely around Azzi’s waist and resting her chin on her shoulder. “Good morning,” she murmured, her voice was a little raspy.

Azzi froze for a moment before squeezing Paige’s hand briefly in acknowledgment. For a second, Paige thought things might be okay—until Azzi said softly, “Let go of me, please.” Paige immediately stepped back, her arms falling to her sides as she leaned against the counter.

Paige’s throat tightened, guilt swelling in her chest. “I’m sorry about last night,” she started, her voice trembling slightly. Her eyes flickered to Azzi, who stood at the stove, her back still turned. The silence that followed felt heavier than the pounding in her head.

Azzi turned off the burner and set the spatula down carefully before facing Paige. Her face was composed, but her eyes carried a weight that made Paige’s stomach churn. Azzi crossed her arms, leaning back against the counter as she studied Paige with a look that made it hard to breathe.

“Do you even know what you’re sorry for?” Azzi’s voice wasn’t harsh, but the question hit like a hammer.

Paige opened her mouth, but the words caught in her throat. She swallowed hard before replying, “I wasn’t in a good place. I didn’t mean to be such a mess.”

Azzi’s expression didn’t soften. Her gaze stayed locked on Paige, who fidgeted under the scrutiny. “You weren’t just a mess, Paige,” Azzi said, her voice steady but laced with an undertone of frustration. “You scared me.”

Paige’s heart dropped at the words. She looked down, her fingers gripping the edge of the counter as if it could anchor her. “I’m sorry, Az,” she murmured, her voice cracking. “I didn’t mean to. I just… I don’t know how to deal with it sometimes, and I didn’t want to drag you into it.”

Azzi tilted her head slightly, her expression unreadable. “You didn’t want to drag me into it?” she repeated, her tone hinting at some disbelief.

“Yeah,” Paige muttered, barely audible, the weight of her own words pressing down on her.

Azzi took a deep breath, turning back to the stove. She grabbed the plates, carefully dividing the eggs and bacon between them. Her movements were measured, but Paige could see the tension in her shoulders.

As Azzi set the plates down on the kitchen island, she spoke again, her voice softer but no less serious. “What do you mean by that?”

Paige hesitated, feeling the knot in her chest tighten. She slowly walked over to the island, pulling out a stool but not sitting down yet. “I mean… we’re not even together, Az,” she said, her voice strained. “I didn’t want to be a burden. I usually just handle it on my own.”

Azzi’s jaw tightened slightly, and she sat down, sliding one of the plates toward Paige, silently telling her to sit down. She didn’t touch her own food, her focus entirely on Paige. The silence that stretched between them was a little deafening.

Finally, Paige sat down beside her, but her hands stayed folded in her lap, her appetite nonexistent. She glanced at Azzi, whose posture was relaxed but whose eyes betrayed a storm of emotions.

Azzi leaned forward slightly, her elbows resting on the counter. “Paige,” she said gently, “you think being a burden is the same as needing help? Because it’s not.”

Paige looked down at her lap, her voice barely a whisper. “It feels like it is.”

Azzi shook her head, her tone softening even more. “You really have to stop doing this to yourself. You don’t have to carry all of it alone. Not with me. We’ve talked about this.”

Paige’s eyes stung, but she blinked rapidly, refusing to let the tears fall. “I just… I don’t want to mess things up. You mean too much to me. I don’t want you seeing that part of my life… to scare you away,” she admitted, her voice barely above a whisper.

Azzi leaned back in her chair, crossing her arms as she studied Paige carefully. Her silence felt heavy, almost unbearable, as if she was weighing every word Paige had just said.

After a moment, Azzi spoke, her voice calm but tinged with something Paige couldn’t quite place. “You think that part of your life would scare me away?”

Paige nodded, biting her bottom lip. “I’ve dealt with it alone for so long because… it’s messy. I’m messy. And I didn’t want to put that on you.”

Azzi’s eyes softened as she sat back in her chair, her arms crossed over her chest. She exhaled deeply, the weight of her thoughts apparent in the tension of her shoulders. After a beat, she leaned forward, her expression a mixture of frustration and care.

“Paige,” she began, her tone steady but laced with emotion, “I keep telling you over and over—you don’t need to deal with it alone anymore. I feel like I tell you that every single day.”

Paige glanced up, the vulnerability in Azzi’s voice cutting straight through her defenses.

Azzi shook her head lightly, her hands uncrossing to rest on the counter as she continued. “You’re not some burden I have to carry. Your life isn’t too messy for me. Stop thinking you have to keep everything locked inside because you don’t.”

Paige’s chest tightened, her hands trembling slightly as she clutched her fork. She struggled to find the words, her voice barely audible as she whispered, “But what if it’s too much?”

Azzi met her gaze, unwavering. “Then we’ll have to deal with it together. I’m not saying it’ll be easy, Paige. But if you keep shutting me out every time you feel like things are falling apart, how can I help? How can I be there for you if you won’t let me?”

Paige’s lips parted, but no sound came out. She felt exposed, like Azzi could see every crack and flaw she had tried so hard to hide. And yet, there was no judgment in Azzi’s gaze—just unwavering patience and care.

“I don’t know how to do this,” Paige admitted, her voice trembling.

Azzi smiled gently, the corners of her mouth barely lifting, but the warmth in her expression was undeniable. “I don’t either… but we’ll figure it out,” she said softly. “But it starts with you letting me in even when it’s ugly.”

Paige nodded slowly, her eyes glistening as she whispered, “I know, I’m sorry baby.”

Azzi didn’t reply, her hand reaching out to rest on Paige’s.

The moment hung between them, heavy with meaning, until the sound of Azzi’s roommate entering the kitchen disrupted the fragile silence.

Azzi glanced at Paige, her voice gentler now. “We’ll talk more later. Just… eat something, okay? I really don’t want you throwing up on my counter.”

Paige offered a faint smile, her heart still racing, and picked up her fork again. The food still felt heavy, but Azzi’s words lingered, a thread of hope tying her together.

…

February 2024

Azzi had a big game tonight. It was the first time Paige had attended one of her games making promises that she would find time to come to one despite her own schedule. Paige wasn’t just showing up because it was important to Azzi—she was showing up because it meant the world to her that Azzi knew she had someone there, cheering her on, no matter what. It didn’t matter that Paige was recognized by fans or that people were whispering about her presence as soon as she walked in. All that mattered to her was Azzi.

The game was packed with energy, but Paige couldn’t focus on anything except Azzi. She watched intently, her eyes never leaving her. Azzi’s every move was so graceful and confident, and as Paige watched her in her element her chest swelled with pride.

Azzi, in turn, couldn’t help but glance over at Paige every so often, her heart skipping each time their eyes met. It didn’t matter that the crowd was roaring, or that her teammates were all over her after she hit a big shot. In those moments, it was just her looking at Paige.

After the game, as Azzi made her way off the court, she spotted Paige waiting for her in the stands. She walked straight to her, her smile widening as she approached her.

“You actually came,” Azzi said, breathless, a playful laugh in her voice.

Paige’s smile was immediate and wide. “Of course I did. I told you I would. You were amazing out there.”

Azzi’s grin softened, a hint of vulnerability in her eyes. “It means a lot that you’re here. I know things are crazy for you with your schedule going into march, so this… it says a lot.”

Paige stepped closer, her heart racing as she reached out, pulling Azzi into a hug. The hug was deep and comforting, lingering just a little longer than usual. The crowd around them started to murmur—surprised to see the two together, given Paige’s status and the two of them never being seen together before this moment. They were close, but this moment was something else. Paige held Azzi tighter, wanting her to know just how much she meant to her. Azzi reciprocated, her grip on Paige firm as she took in the moment.

As they pulled apart, a few fans who had been watching took note of their closeness. Whispers began to circulate, but neither of them paid any attention. They were in their own world.

Paige smiled softly at Azzi, her voice quieter than usual. “I’m proud of you.”

Azzi looked at her, her eyes full of gratitude. “Thank you.”

The two of them stood there, a quiet bubble in the middle of the chaos, just taking in the moment. Azzi’s smile was soft, a mix of exhaustion and happiness, but there was something deeper in her eyes. Paige had kept her promise. She was here. For her.

Paige pulled Azzi in for another hug and they held each other for a moment longer than most people would have expected, and it felt so right that neither of them wanted to pull away. Azzi couldn’t stop the warmth that spread through her chest. It wasn’t just the win, it was having Paige there—fully present, giving her all her attention, all her support, in a world that constantly asked for her attention in a hundred different directions.

Before they could say anything more, a few fans, recognizing Paige, began to approach. Their voices cut through the quiet, making Azzi’s smile falter just a little. But she didn't mind. That was the reality of Paige’s world. But it was still strange, seeing her become the center of attention even in this moment when it felt like it was just for them.

One fan, a young woman, stepped up, a hopeful grin on her face. "Hey, Paige! Can we get a quick picture? Big fan of yours!"

Another fan, a man holding a jersey that wasn’t Paige’s, chimed in, "An autograph too, please?"

Paige, still holding Azzi’s gaze, didn’t break her focus. She gave the fans a polite smile, but her voice was a little firmer than usual.

"Not tonight, guys. Sorry," she said, her tone calm but respectful. "I'm just here for someone else tonight." A few of the fans murmured in disappointment but ultimately understood as they gave the girls space.

“It’s okay, really,” Azzi said gently. She stepped forward, a reflexive smile on her face. “You can take a picture, I’ll wait for you—”

Before she could finish, Paige’s hand tightened around hers, as she looked at the girl, meeting Azzi’s eyes.

“No,” Paige said simply, a slight edge of protectiveness in her tone. “I’m only here for you, Az. Tonight, it’s just you and me.”

Azzi froze for a moment, her breath catching at Paige’s words. There was no hesitation in her voice—no compromise. Paige’s eyes were steady, unwavering, and Azzi realized then that this wasn’t just about a promise she’d made; it was about the space Paige was creating just for Azzi in her life, in front of everyone, despite the noise and the demands of the crowd.

Azzi blinked, her chest tightening with gratitude, and for a moment, she didn’t know what to say. "That was… sweet," Azzi said, her voice barely above a whisper as she leaned a little closer to Paige. "I didn’t expect that."

Paige shrugged, the corner of her mouth turning up into a half-smile. "I told you I don’t let anything or anyone take me away from the important things. And you," she said, her voice dropping just a little, her eyes soft and focused on Azzi, "are important."

Azzi’s smile softened, a small laugh escaping her lips, her eyes filled with a quiet affection. “You’re incredible,” she said, her voice barely above a whisper.

Paige’s grin grew, her fingers gently squeezing Azzi’s hand. “I’m not the one who just dropped 32, remember?” she teased.

Azzi laughed, the sound light and carefree, before she pulled Paige a little closer, the gym now basically empty, their hands still linked. “You know..you’re lucky because I think I’m falling for you Paige Bueckers,” Azzi said softly, the words slipping out before she could stop them.

There it was—the truth, as simple and real as anything they’d said. And though the moment could have felt heavy, it didn’t. It felt freeing, like something they’d both been dancing around for too long had finally come to the surface.

“Well I fell for you a long time ago Azzi Fudd” Paige whispered back, her voice steady but full of meaning.

They stood there for a beat, their faces close, breaths mingling, the tension and connection thick enough to taste. It was a moment that felt timeless—like nothing else mattered, except for the two of them.

But just as they were about to close the distance between them, a voice broke through the quiet.

"Azzi!" It was one of her teammates, jogging over to them with a small smile. "Coach is looking for you."

Azzi’s smile faltered just a little, the reality of her responsibilities coming back into focus. She sighed softly, looking at Paige with a mix of regret and affection.

Paige smiled, though her heart gave a small twinge at the interruption. “Don’t worry I’ll be here,” she said, giving Azzi’s hand one last squeeze before letting go. “I’ll wait for you by my car.”

Azzi nodded, her eyes softening, and she leaned in for a brief kiss on Paige’s cheek. “I won’t be long. I promise.”

Paige smiled back, watching as Azzi turned and jogged off toward the locker room.

March 2024

The energy in the arena was electric, the air vibrating with the sound of fans chanting Paige’s name. Her jersey dotted the crowd, worn by people of all ages, from little kids with wide eyes to older fans who clapped enthusiastically after every play. Azzi had known Paige was a big deal—she’d seen it all over social media, heard the commentators wax poetic about her talent, saw people approaching her first hand out in public—but sitting here, surrounded by the deafening adoration of thousands, was something else entirely.

It didn’t seem to affect Paige at all. On the court, she was a force of nature, her every move calculated, her focus seemingly unshakable. Azzi couldn’t look away, captivated by the way Paige commanded the game. There was a fluidity to her movements, a confidence that made it impossible not to admire her. Watching her in person was different from watching her on TV—there was an energy to it, an intensity that didn’t translate through a screen.

Azzi sat there quietly, trying not to draw attention to herself in the sea of fans, though she doubted anyone would recognize her with all eyes on Paige. They hadn’t had a chance to talk before the game, and Azzi wasn’t even sure Paige knew she was there. Part of her hoped Paige would notice her, but she knew how focused the blonde got when she stepped onto the court.

But then it happened.

It was quick—so quick that the cameras definitely didn’t catch it, and most of the crowd didn’t seem to notice. Paige sank a deep three and as she jogged back on defense, her eyes flicked briefly to the section where Azzi was sitting. She pointed in Azzi’s direction, a subtle gesture that could have been overlooked if you weren’t paying attention.

A small smile spread across Azzi’s face, her heart fluttering at the acknowledgment. She wasn’t just another face in the crowd to Paige. That quick moment, fleeting as it was, felt personal—like it was just for her.

Azzi leaned back in her seat, her smile lingering as she watched Paige fall seamlessly back into her rhythm, her focus unbroken. The way Paige could still find a way to connect with her in the middle of all this chaos, only made Azzi admire her more.

…

After the game the crowd hadn’t fully thinned out by the time Paige made her way toward Azzi, stopping every few steps to sign jerseys, posters, and anything fans shoved in her direction. Her usual easy smile and charm were on full display, but Azzi could see the subtle exhaustion in her movements. Still, when Paige finally reached her, her face lit up in a way that made Azzi’s chest tighten.

Without a word, Paige pulled Azzi into a tight hug, dropping her head onto Azzi’s shoulder and exhaling deeply. Azzi’s smile softened as she wrapped her arms around Paige, resting her cheek against the blonde’s temple. The moment felt intimate, even with the buzz of fans and cameras surrounding them.

When they finally pulled away, Paige’s lips twitched into a smirk as she licked them, her eyes glinting with mischief. “So… you want me to sign your jersey?” she teased.

Azzi rolled her eyes, but the small grin tugging at her lips gave her away. “I’m not a fan,” she shot back, raising an eyebrow.

Paige gasped dramatically, placing a hand over her chest. “Wowww, my own girl isn’t my fan?”

Azzi shook her head, her smile widening. “I’m probably your number one fan, actually.”

Paige’s smirk deepened, and she grabbed the sharpie from someone behind her. “That’s more like it,” she quipped. Without hesitation, she bent down slightly to scribble her signature across of Azzi’s jersey.

Azzi glanced down, noticing the hearts Paige had added at the end of her usual autograph. “Hearts huh?” she teased, raising an eyebrow.

“Special treatment,” Paige murmured, her voice low enough that only Azzi could hear.

As the two stood there, fans crowded nearby, calling Paige’s name and clamoring for her attention. Paige glanced over briefly, flashing her signature smile and promising to get to them in a moment, but her focus quickly returned to Azzi.

For that instant, it felt like they were in their own little bubble. Paige stepped back slightly, her gaze lingering on Azzi. “Thanks for coming,” she said softly, the sincerity in her voice cutting through the noise around them.

“You played amazing,” Azzi replied, her voice equally soft, though there was a distinct note of admiration in her tone.

Paige’s smile widened, her shoulders relaxing as she pulled Azzi into another hug. This one lingered longer, Paige’s hands resting securely against Azzi’s back. She leaned in just enough to murmur, “I wish I could kiss you right now.”

Azzi let out a quiet laugh, pulling back slightly to meet Paige’s gaze. “Later,” she promised.

Paige smirked at the reply. With a quick glance at the barrier separating them, Paige reached down and helped Azzi step over the rope, ensuring she was on the same side as her.

Once Azzi was safely on the other side, Paige flagged down a staff member. “Can you take her to the back for me? I’ll meet her there in a few minutes,” she said, her tone polite yet firm, making it clear she wouldn’t take no for an answer.

Azzi hesitated for a moment, her eyes scanning Paige’s face, but Paige gave her a reassuring smile. “I’ll be back there soon I promise,” she said, squeezing Azzi’s hand briefly before turning her attention back to the eager fans still calling her name.

Azzi nodded, casting one last glance at Paige before following the staff member toward the back. Paige stood for a moment, watching her disappear into the crowd, before turning back to the fans with her usual bright smile, ready to finish taking pictures and signing autographs.

…

When Paige and Azzi stepped into the dorm, the silence greeted them like an unspoken invitation. No one else was around yet—a rare luxury that Paige didn’t intend to waste. She dropped her bag carelessly by the door, her arm draped casually over Azzi’s shoulder as they walked inside.

As soon as the door to the suite clicked shut, Paige turned to Azzi, wasting no time. Her hands found Azzi’s face as she leaned in, pulling her into a deep kiss. “I missed you so much,” Paige murmured against Azzi’s lips, her voice tinged with a mix of longing and relief.

Azzi pulled back just enough to laugh, her hands resting lightly on Paige’s waist. “You just saw me last week,” she teased, her grin warm and playful.

Paige shrugged, her fingers gently trailing down Azzi’s arm. “Doesn’t matter,” she said with a smirk.

Azzi shook her head, her smile softening as she looked at Paige. “It’s empty in here,” she noted, her tone dropping slightly, her implication clear.

Paige’s smirk widened as she caught the hint, and before she could respond, Azzi reached for the jersey she had on. In one smooth motion, she tugged it off, revealing her bra beneath it, and turned on her heel, heading toward Paige’s room without a word.

Paige stood frozen for a moment, her lips parting in surprise before breaking into a grin. “Fucking finally,” she muttered under her breath, her heart racing as she followed Azzi down the short hallway.

When they reached her door, Paige paused briefly, grabbing a couple of hair ties from her desk and slipping them onto the outside of the door handle. She shut the door behind her with a soft click, her gaze fixed on Azzi, who was already sitting on the edge of the bed, waiting for her with a smile on her face.

Paige stepped closer to Azzi, her hands instinctively finding their way to Azzi’s face as she settled herself between her legs. Her movements were slow as if savoring every second. She leaned down, her forehead briefly brushing against Azzi’s before capturing her lips in a soft, lingering kiss.

Pulling back just enough to whisper, Paige’s voice was filled with a raw tenderness. “I love you so much,” she said, her blue eyes searching Azzi’s as though trying to convey everything words couldn’t.

Azzi’s lips curved into a warm smile, her hands gliding up Paige’s sides. “I love you more, superstar,” she teased softly, though her tone carried a depth of sincerity that made Paige’s heart swell.

Before Paige could respond, Azzi tugged her down, their laughter mixing as Paige allowed herself to fall gently on top of her. She buried her face in the crook of Azzi’s neck, inhaling the familiar scent that had become a source of comfort and peace.

For the first time in what felt like forever, Paige allowed herself to fully let go. No pressure, no cameras, no expectations—just the steady rhythm of Azzi’s heartbeat beneath her and the quiet certainty that she had found something she never wanted to let go of.

Settling deeper into Azzi’s embrace kissing her deeply, Paige realized she was finally with the woman who had changed her life in less than a year.

[mayakern]

In light of finding out that there's actually people out there being jerks to you in your inbox, I wanted to tell you how much joy you've brought into my life without even knowing about it! My girlfriend introduced me to your art and your clothing and I've been a huge fan ever since! Your art makes me feel more comfortable in my own skin and see beauty where I hadn't thought to look before, and watching you succeed puts a smile on my face. I wish you and your wife a long and happy life full of joyful memories and interesting stories!

aw thank you, this is so incredibly sweet 🥺🥺🥺

we did have a couple ppl being weirdly combative at the combo of me asking why ppl hadn't purchased from the canada store (this was a genuine question to see if there were issues we didn't know about, which there were) and then me talking about what a rough position the business is in currently, but largely people have been nothing other than extremely kind and supportive and wonderful.

i think it often comes down to the sad reality that when a small brand like us, which is more expensive than fast fashion in large part because we use certified ethical labor, talks about our financial/sales issues in a time when most people are struggling, people sometimes get defensive.

even if i am not being aggressive or mean or blaming our customers--i am also a non-wealthy person who lived through 2024, i have not at any point been unaware of just how difficult things have gotten and i don't blame anyone for their financial situation--because of the type of business i run, seeing me or the business fail can make people feel guilty. because even tho a lot of people try not to think about it, when you buy a fast fashion shirt for $5--or when you buy several, knowing that they'll fall apart after just a few wears--there are so many "invisible" costs. knowing that you can afford a shein clothing haul because someone was, at best, paid pennies to make the garments wears a person down. knowing, too, that that piece of clothing that was made by exploiting other humans is going to end up in the trash relatively quickly also takes its toll.

for a lot of people, fast fashion is all they can afford. and also for a lot of people, they have convinced themselves that buying a higher quantity of cheap garments that will fall apart quickly is more affordable or a better deal than saving up for one more expensive piece that will last them multiple years. after all, buying a single garment that you'll wear for years doesn't give you nearly as much of a dopamine hit as getting an entire clothing haul that costs the same amount up front.

and i think because of this--because a lot of people make this choice and do not feel proud of it--when they see me or my business struggle, they project their own feelings of guilt and assume that i must be blaming them personally. that i am figuratively breathing down their neck and haunting their closets.

the truth is, i know the path i have chosen is not the easy one. i could probably make a lot more money and live a lot more comfortably if i operated on a business model that more closely resembled fast fashion. but for as long as i can afford them, i would like to stick to my ideals. and i don't blame other people for not being able to do the same.

[trustmypoison]

DK with a 'perfect' partner

Requested? Yes!

TW/CW: slightly suggestive near the end, minors use caution.

Seokmin is quiet. 

It’s not that he’s never quiet. Sure, he likes to talk, and he can be quite excitable, but he’s a great listener, too. He’s always so engaged. You can see it in his eyes, the way they sometimes imperceptibly change when you say something in particular. 

The trouble is that he’s not really doing that right now. He’s got a dazed look as he sits at the kitchen island, watching you chop a few things for dinner. You had an inkling that he’s not listening, and you’ve been testing him. And he’s failed the test. 

You finish chopping the veggies and washing your hands before coming around the island. You grab his shoulder, lightly pushing him to turn so you can stand between his legs. His hands fall to your waist, gripping distractedly. You hold his face between your hands, thumb sweeping his cheek. The dazed look remains. “Did you hear me?” You ask lightly. He nods. It makes the corner of your lips pull up a little. “So you agree?”

“Agree?” He mumbles. 

“That we should move,” you say simply. 

“Move?” He’s still mumbling. 

“Yep, to Antarctica.” 

His eyes flare as the dazed look disappears in a snap. “What?”

You snort, pressing a little kiss to his nose. “That’s what I thought.” Your fingers crawl into his hair, and his eyes drift closed. “You seem distracted tonight. Where’s your head at, baby?”

It takes him a few long moments to answer, maybe due to avoidance or maybe sleepiness. And it’s not much of an answer. “It’s stupid.”

“Unlikely. Come on, you can tell me.”

He doesn’t really meet your eyes, looking somewhere over your shoulder when he sighs, sort of blurting it out. “Why are you with me?”

You blink, feeling your back go rigid. His fingers dig into your back a little like he’s afraid you’ll pull away. This sort of reaction is so… unlike Seokmin. It sort of makes you shudder. “Why would you ask something like that, baby?”

“Because you’re perfect.” 

He says it so simply, yet there are layers to it that he doesn’t say. It requires you to dig deeper. “And you aren’t?”

He laughs, but it sounds kind of hollow. The sound creates a pit in your stomach because he always has such a joyful, genuine laugh. It’s something that makes you smile no matter what. Yet another thing that is unlike him tonight. “No, I’m not. That’s why I don’t get it.”

You’re sort of at a loss for words, so you pull back to look at him, fighting against his grip ever so slightly. Your hands pin themselves to his shoulders. “Seokmin, I’m going to need more than that.”

His jaw ticks, eyes stormy and swirling with an emotion that you hate to see. “You’re beautiful. And funny. And smart. And kind. I haven’t met someone who doesn’t like you yet. You’re good at everything you do on the first try. You have a degree and walked into a high-paying position just like that. You make it all look so… effortless. And I’m me.” 

“What’s wrong with being you?” You ask, pursing your lips. His jaw is still tight, and he stays silent. “Do you want to know what I think?” His eyes hesitantly meet yours, and you take it as a ‘yes,’ stepping forward again to fold your arms around his shoulders. He seems relieved that you’re closer again. “I think that you underestimate how much I fuck up. Do you know that I spilled coffee all over my keyboard yesterday at work, and they had to bring me a new one? And I managed to break a heel on the subway last week? And I have a degree, but I almost didn’t graduate. And I had help getting that job through some connections. I fuck up all the time, but I just can’t spend any time ruminating over it later.”

You sigh, looking at your lovely boyfriend, who’s staring at you with big, vulnerable eyes. You know the look he's wearing. This sweet man is fighting the urge to correct you or make you feel better about everything you just told him. “And you? You are so handsome. I mean, you make me melt sometimes because you’re so attractive. And I know for a fact that I’m not the only one that thinks so. And your talent? Unmatched, really. I know you work hard, but you make what you do look so easy sometimes. The belting out songs at random, the dancing, the stage presence. I couldn’t do any of that.” You think you can see a little bit of moisture gathering in his lower lash line, but he keeps looking at you. 

“And on top of all that? You make me laugh so hard that it hurts almost every day. And I don’t think I’ve ever seen you be unkind to anyone, not even when they deserve it. Those are only some of the reasons that I’m with you. So don’t talk bad about my boyfriend, okay?”

He huffs, sniffling as he folds, his face landing in the crook of your neck. You hold him for a while, letting the minutes tick by. Eventually, he sniffs, sitting back up. “Sorry. I had a bad day, and I sort of spiraled.”

“It’s okay. I’m glad you talked to me about it so I could set you straight.” You adopt a teasing tone if only to lighten the mood. You glance over your shoulder at the chopped veggies. They can wait for a bit… right? “I think maybe I have more work to do for you.”

Confusion paints his face. “What do you mean? You were cooking dinner. You wanted to try that new recipe.”

“It can wait. Come with me?” 

Something about the way your tone dips or the look on your face makes it click for him. There’s light in his eyes again as he lets you back away from him, linking hands with you. “I’ll follow you anywhere. Even Antarctica.”

You lead him to the bedroom, thinking you’d follow him anywhere, too. You just have to convince him of that. 

[thewertsearch]

The Doctor is in.

And they're a bit of a pattern-breaker, aren't they?

We've already used up every permutation of GCAT, to the point where the post-Scratch Players have been forced to share Persterchum initials with their predecessors. UranianUmbra has evidently decided they're not going to bother with all that nonsense, and has chosen a completely original handle.

That's not the only pattern they're breaking, either. Instead of pestering, trolling or bothering Jane, UU claims to be cheering her. To me, it reads as a little too saccharine for comfort - as though Umbra is trying a little too hard to seem non-threatening.

UU: good morning, lovely. ^u^ GG: Why, hellooooooo. UU: so i gUess today is finally the day yoU make everything better.

Also, they're aping Karkat's original Pesterlog, which does nothing to allay my suspicions.

Karkat originally portrayed himself as a huge asshole, but was slowly revealed to be a pretty nice guy - so, when someone uses his words, but places themselves on the opposite side of the coin, I'm obviously going to be primed for another inversion.

UU: it is the day whereafter the legendary octet of mUtUal progenitoriety will come together and heal a great breach in paradox space.

Mutual progenitoriety sounds like a phenomenon where two or more entities are responsible for each other's creation.

It's been explored extensively in art, science and philosophy, and the concept fits very well into a self-generating cosmology such as Homestuck's.

I don't think Umbra is referring to the Reacharound, though - if nothing else, the Reacharound had nothing to do with Jane. After all, her session is supposed to create an entirely new universe, and has nothing whatsoever to do with Alternia.

Unless...

...one of my oldest, most ambitious theories was right all along.

UU: a day delivered throUgh eighty billion years and foUr distinct Universal instances worth of Unfathomable tUrbUlence. UU: and while the emerald eye of this storm is fixed in the abyss forever

I assume the 'emerald eye' is the Green Sun. As one of Sburb's most critical components, it holds a place of extreme importance in the cosmos.

Which, let us remind ourselves, is a bad thing. The Sun was, after all, created on the orders of Doc Scratch, and its existence means that English can exert his influence over every session with a First Guardian - which, I'm pretty sure, is every single session.

The fact that the thing is apparently here forever is probably the worst news we've heard all Act - assuming, of course, that UU is telling the truth.

UU: today yoU are poised to escape its scowl once and for all.

Umbra seems to be implying that there's somewhere completely outside the Sun's domain - some part of reality where the mechanism of Skaia no longer applies.

That's certainly news to me - but hey, if that's an option, count me the fuck in.

UU: by skaias gUiding light, yoU may leave behind its tUrning arms of bright coloUrs and mayhem, and secUre peace for yoUr cosmic progeny for all dUration.

That said; even if you can escape into a Sburbless reality, Sburb will still exist. Skaia's mechanism will still be there, right behind you, and English will still be pulling it apart at the seams.

Like, sure. Escape the game, find a home, restore your species - but don't just abandon the multiverse to its fate. English is killing trillions, and it almost sounds like UranianUmbra is trying to convince you to let him.

[detta-pica]

The last part especially! I've had this argument with people I consider smart, sensitive, good communicators, kind and well-meaning - and yet they fail to consider that there's no way to only allow for "appropriate" depictions of a thing.

There just isn't. We can either have all of it or none. Either we allow all kinds of people to mess with X concept in whatever way seems appealing to them, or we censor X entirely.

Because how do we judge where the line between appropriate and inappropriate is? When it's art? When it's satire? When it's a sexual fantasy? There's no way to measure the harm caused by fiction. Every discussion on this topic focused on that harm veers towards preventing/punishing thoughtcrime, and that's just ridiculous.

And if we censor X entirely, it becomes more dangerous. Low hanging fruit example: conversations about abuse can help people realise what they are seeing/experiencing is not normal and not okay, and act. Censorship is a tool for controlling people, not protecting them. It removes their ability to think for themselves.

On top of all that, there's also a conversation to be had about what gets criminalised and why, what the best ways to reduce harm actually are, how "appropriate" isn't a great criterion for judging things like exploration of kink, etc.

Full offense and pun fully intended, but I genuinely think the very existence of "dead dove, do not eat" was a fucking canary in the mines, and no one really paid attention.

Because the tag itself was created as a response to a fandom-wide tendency to disregard warnings and assume tagging was exaggerated. And then the same fucking idiots reading those tags describing things they found upsetting or disturbing or just not to their taste would STILL click into the stories and give the writer's grief about it.

And as a response writers began using the tag to signal "no, really, I MEAN the tags!"

But like.

If you really think about it, that's a solution to a different problem. The solution to "I know you tagged your story appropriately but I chose to disregard the tags and warnings by reading it anyway, even though I knew it would upset me, so now I'm upset and making it your problem" is frankly a block, a ban and wide-spread blacklisting. But fandom as a whole is fucking awful at handling bad faith, insidious arguments that appeal to community inclusion and weaponize the fact most people participating in fandom want to share the space with others, as opposed to hurting people.

So instead of upfront ridiculing this kind of maladaptive attempt to foster one's own emotional self-regulation onto random strangers on the internet, fandom compromised and came up with a redundant tag in a good faith attempt to address an imaginary nuance.

There is no nuance to this.

A writer's job is to tag their work correctly. It's not to tag it exhaustively. It's not even to tag it extensively. A writer's sole obligation, as far as AO3 and arguably fandom spaces are concerned, is to make damn sure that the tags they put on their story actually match whatever is going on in that story.

That's it.

That's all.

"But what if I don't want to read X?" Well, you don't read fic that's tagged X.

"But what if I read something that wasn't tagged X?" Well, that's very unfortunate for you, but if it is genuinely that upsetting, you have a responsibility to yourself to only browse things explicitly tagged to not include X.

"But that's not a lot of fic!" Hi, you must be new here, yes, welcome to fandom. Most of our spaces are built explicitly as a reaction to There's Not Enough Of The Thing I Want, both in canon and fandom.

"But there are things on the internet that I don't like!" Yeah, and they are also out there, offline. And, here's the thing, things existing even though we personally dislike or even hate or even flat out find offensive/gross/immoral/unspeakable existing is the price we pay to secure our right to exist as individuals and creators, regardless of who finds US personally unpleasant, hateful or flat out offensive/gross/immoral/unspeakable.

"But what about [illegal thing]?!" So the thing itself is illegal, because the thing itself has been deemed harmful. But your goddamn cop-poisoned authoritarian little heart needs to learn that sometimes things are illegal that aren't harmful, and defaulting to "but illegal!" is a surefire way to end up on the wrong side of the fascism pop quiz. You're not a figure of authority and the more you demand to control and exercise authority by command, rather than leadership, the less impressive you seem. You know how you make actual, genuine change in a community? You center harm and argue in good faith to find accommodations and spread awareness of real, actual problems.

But let's play your game. Let's pretend we're all brainwashed cop-abiding little cogs that do not own a single working brain cell to exercise critical thinking with. 99% of the time, when you cry about any given thing "being illegal!!!" you're correct only so far as the THING itself being illegal. The act or object is illegal. Depiction of it is not. You know why, dipshit? Because if depiction of the thing were illegal, you wouldn't be able to talk about it. You wouldn't be able to educate about it. You wouldn't be able to reexamine and discuss and understand the thing, how and why and where it happens and how to prevent it. And yeah, depiction being legal opens the door for people to make depictions that are in bad taste or probably not appropriate. Sure. But that's the price we pay, creating tools to demystify some of the most horrific things in the world and support the people who've survived them. The net good of those tools existing outweighs the harm of people misusing them.

"You're defending the indefensible!" No, you're clumsily stumbling into a conversation that's been going on for centuries, with your elementary school understanding of morality and your bone-deep police state rot filtering your perception of reality, and insisting you figured it out and everyone else at the table is an idiot for not agreeing with you. Shut the fuck up, sit the fuck down and read a goddamn book.

[mxtxfanatic]

Love that Wei Wuxian takes the time to teach the juniors a lesson about the ingenuity of the non-cultivator civilians in Yi City:

“You see?” Wei Wuxian said. “Don’t laugh—this is an example of the cleverness of common people. Sure, it’s crude and looks trivial, but it is indeed effective at defending against low level corpses. If the corpse trips over the threshold and falls to the floor, it won’t be able to crawl back up for a while because its limbs are still stiff. By the time it can get up, either the sun is about to rise and the rooster is about to start crowing, or the coffin house guard has discovered it. The fact that ordinary people without any background in cultivation thought of a method like this is pretty amazing.”

–Chapt. 38: Flora VI, fanyiyi

Because the way that the kids (mostly but not exclusively Jin Ling) have been shitting on the commoners, on their “stupid” cultural practices or their protection rituals that are meant to deter evil because god forbid the actual cultivators do so they’re “too lazy” to do for themselves... Idk how anyone can read this book and not see how pervasive the classism is in this world.

[sombraglaze]

a note I'd add is that if you're working on a full on professional thing (like a book you'll publish, or if you're working in an indie game studio) then it's worth considering hiring an actual conlanger! in the same way we may hire experts from other areas to enhance our work we can get someone who knows a lot about linguistics to make a full fledged language for us

of course it might not be the cheapest cause, you know, making a whole language takes hundreds of hours of work, but you could also hire a conlanger to make something simpler than a full language and still get results that are more intricate and naturalistic than what one might achieve without any background in linguistics

I'm not trying to dissuade anyone from making their own conlang sketches if they're excited to do it, it's very fun! I'm just putting the hiring option on the table cause I think a lot of people might assume that the only way to get a conlang in their fiction is to make it themselves, but there's lots of very capable conlangers who would absolutely love the opportunity to do it professionally!

also I may or may not be salty that the joke in the post is "Linguistics Georg R.R. Tolkien" because that gives the credit of making the conlangs to George R. R. Martin when the one to actually make them was David J. Peterson (he has a tumblr too, @ dedalvs) I just don't like it when art is misattributed. Tolkien was a conlanger tho, that one is correct

Conlanging for cheaters

quick tips for creating fantasy language(s) that look believable if you squint

Pick a few rules about what letter/sound combinations can and cannot exist (or are common/uncommon). For example, in English, "sp" or "st" can begin a word, but in Spanish they can't. The "ng" sound (or the voiced velar nasal if you want to get technical), can't appear at the beginning of a syllable in English, but it can in at least of third of languages around the world. English allows for consonant clusters (more than one consonant together without a vowel), but some languages, such as Hawaiian, don't. Picking a few distinctive rules that are different from English or the language you are writing in, and sticking to them, will yield a lot better results than just keysmashing.

Assign meaning to a few suffixes, prefixes, or roots. A simple and useful example of this is making up a particle that means -land or -city or -town, and tacking it onto your appropriate place names. You could also have a particle with a similar meaning to the "er/or one we have in English, such as in "baker," "singer," or "operator," and then incorporate it in your fantasy titles or professions. It's like an Easter egg for careful readers to figure out, and it will make your language/world feel more cohesive.

Focus on places and names. You usually don't need to write full sentences/paragraphs in your conlang. What you might want to do with it is name things. The flavor of your language will seep in from the background, with the added benefit of giving readers some hints on background lore. For example, you could have a conlang that corresponds to a certain group of people, and a character with a corresponding name could then be coded as being from that group without having to specify. A human-inhabited city with an elven-sounding name might imply that it was previously inhabited by elves.

You don't have to know what everything means. Unless you are Linguistics Georg R. R. Tolkien, you probably don't want to (and shouldn't!) actually make up a whole language. So stick some letters together (following your linguistic rules, of course) and save fretting over grammar and definitions for the important stuff.

(Bonus) This isn't technically conlanging, but it can be fun to make up an idiom or two for your fantasy culture (just in English or whatevs) and sprinkle that in a few times. The right made-up idiom can allude to much larger cultural elements without you having to actually explain it.

Congrats! You now have a conlang you can dust over your wip like an appropriate amount of glitter. Conlangs can be intimidating, just because there's so much you can do, but that doesn't mean you have to do it all. So yeah anyway here's what I would recommend; hope y'all have fun :D

[bunnieswithknives]

Thanks.

Prev

[knightingale]

The "Sansa reminds Sandor of his sister" motive that some people try to hitch to his character really just flies in the face of his actual attachments to her, doesn't it? Sansa reminds Sandor of himself. He sees the little boy who used to love knights in this girl who's been swept up by the same romanticism. He sees his abuser in her abusers, the much larger knight(s) beating on the helpless child. He sees how she is betrayed by every level of authority that should have saved her and remembers his father's neglect and Tywin and Robert's apathy for Gregor's crimes. He's protective of Sansa because he was Sansa.

And GRRM's design, that one of the strongest warriors in the series, a fearsome and cynical 6'8" guy who's "muscled like a bull" and has the face of death itself, sees himself in this soft and effeminate teen girl, and empathizes with her because he was an abuse victim too, is INFINITELY more compelling than "Oh yeah I bet she just reminds him of his sister," who he's never mentioned and who we know literally nothing about. Way to unnecessarily water down a character, you couldn't have ignored the black and white text more efficiently if you tried.

[dykedvonte]

I think depictions of Anya being cruel to Curly or drawing out his suffering are artful and chilling but completely miss the point of the story and her character.

I'm not saying she doesn't deserve to have that "I told you so" moment with him but not in something callous or cold. Even if that is how it happened, she'd immediately feel guilty cause at that point she's not tormenting her tormenter or even the person truly at fault. She's doing something cathartic, similar to how Jimmy likely hits Curly to release rage he can't against the rest of the crew. She'd see herself as no different when she'd come back from the moment and see Curly cowering at her. She wants someone to take responsibility but how does being cruel to the defenseless help? Why would she want the power Jimmy has over her over Curly?

The idea of her extending someone else's pain is just so against the struggles she already faces and how she can't even bring herself to cause someone pain even to help them. Her very desire is to release herself from her own suffering and I doubt she'd even fine some sort of guilty release in being cruel to another.

[fancychaostraveller]

I just finished Buddy Daddies and your wolves now moved on to me 😭

I think they would be a really great as platonic partners, I adore that kind of symbiotic relationship where they each learn from the other (and Miri ofc) how to change and be better version of themselves not because of romantic love but because of a love that run just as deep, and that is not represented enough! You can be someone's soulmates platonically and that's a great thing that fit the two of them perfectly!

But also Rei slept in Kazuki's bed with Miri between them and now you can't really convince me he doesn't do it when she's not there ya know?

Inside you are two wolves.

One says that Rei and Kazuki's relationship is not any less meaningful as platonic life partners. There are more ways to be a family than brothers or lovers. It'd actually be very nice to see two unrelated and non-romantically involved men raise a kid together and navigate parenthood.

The other wolf says "okay but I'm queer and would like to see them Smooch."