#when they are quite literally blinded by grief

[precambrianhottopic]

thinking about. roanan funeral practices

[honeyliruh]

When I think of Sabr, I think of Yaqub عليه السلام and the qissah of Surah Yusuf. And I think its because I've always resonated with the way Allah سبحانه و تعالى shows us through his prophet that the method of observing patience, may not necessarily look the same for everyone. Yaqub عليه السلام went blind from his tears of grief, Subhan'Allah, and yet he still carried the purest form of Hope in his heart. He trusted His Lord's Plan knowing his complaints were only heard by Him alone, and even still his grief caused him to lose his own sight. As someone who has always worn their heart on their sleeve I remember feeling so heard and understood when I came across these profound verses. For the first time I felt content with the fact that, feeling things deep within my core and ultimately responding to my body's way of releasing grief, sorrow, loss, pain did not in any way translate to anything other than Sabr. I realised the truth in how our Lord's profound words have not just been preserved to be a book with stories of the past, but rather it is the sole cure to our hearts when this world feels like too much of a burden. It is and has always been our only way of navigating through this world and all it's trials and that is quite literally why our Lord Himself reminds us, "verily in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest". So for those of you who are struggling with something that no one can truly comprehend the depths of, know that you are entitled to your own way of coping that too without the pressure of someone else's definition of Sabr. And know that your Lord is All Aware of all the turmoils your heart has endured, He knows the sincere weight of each tear that falls from your eyes and ultimately it is He, who shall compensate for them just as He returned the coolness of Yaqub عليه السلام eyes.

Most of all, let this be a reminder that your tears have never fallen in vain 🌷

-honeyliruh

وَتَوَلَّىٰ عَنْهُمْ وَقَالَ يَـٰٓأَسَفَىٰ عَلَىٰ يُوسُفَ وَٱبْيَضَّتْ عَيْنَاهُ مِنَ ٱلْحُزْنِ فَهُوَ كَظِيمٌ

He turned away from them, lamenting, “Alas, poor Joseph!” And his eyes turned white out of the grief he suppressed. [Surah Yusuf - Verse 84]

قَالَ إِنَّمَآ أَشْكُوا۟ بَثِّى وَحُزْنِىٓ إِلَى ٱللَّهِ وَأَعْلَمُ مِنَ ٱللَّهِ مَا لَا تَعْلَمُونَ

He replied, “I complain of my anguish and sorrow only to Allah, and I know from Allah what you do not know [Surah Yusuf - Verse 86]

فَلَمَّآ أَن جَآءَ ٱلْبَشِيرُ أَلْقَىٰهُ عَلَىٰ وَجْهِهِۦ فَٱرْتَدَّ بَصِيرًا ۖ قَالَ أَلَمْ أَقُل لَّكُمْ إِنِّىٓ أَعْلَمُ مِنَ ٱللَّهِ مَا لَا تَعْلَمُونَ

But when the bearer of the good news arrived, he cast the shirt over Jacob’s face, so he regained his sight. Jacob then said ˹to his children˺, “Did I not tell you that I truly know from Allah what you do not know?” [Surah Yusuf - Verse 96]

[tortibomb]

Dramas that consumed me in 2024

Out of the many dramas I consumed this year, here are the ones that consumed me the most. They still haunt me in some sort of way. I think about them often. My brain literally still rots. Spoilers may be included under each gif.

I also wanted to work on gif skills so I made some new gifs and added ones I've made in the past.

The Spirealm - 2024

None of these are in any particular order but if I had one series that I thought about the most and felt the most grief over, it was The Spirealm. I will never be over the huge twist with Ruan Lan Zhu and the giant time skip they threw at us. If I let myself think about it, I cry. I still haven't finished the novel but I plan to eventually.

The On1y One - 2024

The loneliness from both of these boys was heartbreaking. They started off at odds, to brothers, to friends, to each others home. I still think about the stolen glances, little touches, their growth and healing. The unresolved feelings in the end hurts me and I pray we get a season two.

Peaceful Property - 2024

Of course Peaceful Property is still relatively fresh but I still think about this found family often.. The added stories of the ghosts were a special touch, I still think and cry about the mysteries that were going on at some of the properties. I thought I was coming into a silly little show but these goobers had me crying almost every episode. Home's english slang will live as react gifs to send to my husband for years to come.

Love in the Big City - 2024

I wish I could have watched LITBC weekly as half of the viewers here did just to have it last longer on my screen but I simply have no self control. It was a bittersweet ending and I find myself thinking about Yeong's relationships quite often. I am still completely heart broken that he pushed Gyu Ho out of his life because he didn't want to hold him back. I do hope that some day they see each other again and resume their life together.

Let Free the Curse of Taekwondo - 2024

This was a heartbreaking drama but with a happy ending. It gave me young boys with traumatic stories who find solace in each other, it gave me a small little snippet of what could be happiness, and it took it away for 12 years. I knew the time skip was coming but it was still devastating.

Jack and Joker - 2024

Jack and Joker is still fresh as well but I ate it up every week. I couldn't hate most of these, what I thought were, complex characters. Everyone did bad things to protect their loved ones. Joke did it for Jack, Tattoo did it for his mom, Save did it for Hope and vice versa. Obviously that doesn't mean I liked their choices. The weeks went by so slow waiting for the next episode.

Mr. Plankton - 2024

I don't like stories like this but I watched it for Woo Do Hwan. It didn't disappoint but i cried for days after finishing it. I cried when I made the gif! This damn beautiful smile! 😭 Hae Jo and Jae Mi had a second chance at love together. I often wonder how they would have lived together if Hae Jo didn't pass on. I wonder about the ways they could have started a family with fertility help or adoption. It hit me hard as well because I struggled with infertility.

Love Sea - 2024

Love Sea was the hottest thing I have ever watched on my tv screen ok. Not only that, I was infatuated with Mahasamut. If nothing else I think about Mahasamut quite often. I think about him protecting Meena. I think about him taking off his collar, so to speak, to knock out Jak.

My Stand In - 2024

Toxic Ming and Cinnamon Roll Joe. I was blind to the color red while watching this to be honest but I won't say I felt bad for Ming until maybe the last few episodes. Joe never got back to his body, and I didn't think he would, but I held onto a little hope that he may. I loved both of these characters, flaws and all. I cannot wait to see Up & Poom in their future project together.

2023 & Beyond

Bloodhounds - 2023

Bloodhounds is where I fell in love with Woo Do Hwan. Episode one where Gun Woo kicked all those bodyguards asses to save his mom is all it took for me to be hooked. This one kept me highly entertained as each episode kept me on the edge of my seat. The bromance was and is probably still my favorite. After I finished this series I started several dramas that couldn't hook me and I had to take a small drama watching break. I CANNOT WAIT for season two.

The Devil Judge - 2021

I need a detailed list of any and all similar series. I'll be honest, it took me a couple episodes to get into this but when I did... well I was done for. In the end, Yo Han leaves and Ga On is left alone. He literally has no one significant in his life now. No parents, No Su Hyeon, No Jeong Ho, No Yo Han, No Elijah. AND I WILL NEVER BE OVER THAT!

Beyond Evil - 2021

This drama has the most satisfying conclusion. Yes, the Dong Sik and Joo Won go onto their separate paths and yes I was sad, but I felt like it had to happen so everyone could move on. The things these two said to or about each other still drive me insane.

A Tale of Thousand Stars - 2021

1000 Stars took me on a journey that broke my heart and by the end healed me. I really need to rewatch this soon so I may be a little fuzzy on it. I didn't feel like the romance was a central part of the plot so I wasn't upset they had only kissed once at end. It was more about Tian and and his journey of self discovery. I remember being floored by the plot twist and I remember sobbing like a bitch.

Guardian - 2018

I put Guardian off for a long time even after I decided to watch it but I ended up loving this drama so much I read the novel series shortly after finishing. For a censored bl, I think the actors did fantastic portraying their feelings for each other. The way they looked at each other, spoke to each other, touched each other. I yearned for more. The drama made it a bromance but it is quite obvious they care for each other.

Currently watching that is consuming me: The Heart Killers, Our Youth, Spare Me Your Mercy. Would these make the list after they were finished airing? I don't know. I also finished Flower of Evil last night and I almost added it to this list but since it hasn't had time to marinate I decided against it.

[theriverbeyond]

Do you think if John hadn't purged the knowledge of My Immortal from the universe that the sixth would've known immediately that cyth was impersonating dulcie? I just feel like dulcie is the most likely candidate to describe herself in that style.

SEE i think the tragedy is despite both Cam and Pal having spent over 10 years corresponding with her, neither of them were able to pick up on Cytherea's lie, even (as we find out later, in HtN) when she really isn't trying very hard. Like, why didn't they know immediately? It's not like they didn't have enough clues as is.

because.... Dulcie had definitely described Protesilauris to them, quite extensively!! and it doesn't take a genius to know the vivacious man who loved his children and roses and Dulcie isn't the shambling zombie that showed up at Canaan house. Not to mention the girl who wanted to run away and smoke cigarettes instead of lying in bed to convalesce from familial blood cancer wouldn't have spent her days at Canaan house lying on the terrace, reading books and knitting, doing exactly the same thing she would have been doing had she stayed at home to die. The clues were so obvious they were barely even clues!! Dulcie fed Cytherea "a lot of hot bullshit" about her life, which means Cytherea was literally working with less than no information when it comes to a convincing impersonation and... Cam and Pal still missed it.

i know this was probably supposed to be a silly ask but I just can't not think about the tragedy of it all. Was it Palamedes' well of grief -- maybe even anger? annoyance? frustration? resignation? -- at her rejection the reason that both he, and Cam, missed that she was gone? Did Cam's fire of devotion towards Palamedes blind her to all the obvious signs, her rush to protect and close ranks around him being enough to eclipse all rational thought with regards to the image of the person who rejected him? Were they both so utterly wounded, frustrated, jealous, that they truly did forget the friend they knew?

[inbarfink]

Goddam, just seeing Simon in these last two episodes is really flooding me with so many conflicting emotions.

Because, on the one hand, after his lowest point in Episode 4 - resigning himself to death in the hands of the Scarab - he’s clearly finally doing better. Just look at him making plans

And showing off his smarts

And finally genuinely smiling and feeling happy

And being so glad to meet the alt versions of his friends

And getting excited about his nerdy shit for the first time in glob-knows-how-long

And cracking goofy geeky jokes

And offering others the same grace and kindness he was given when he was trapped under the curse of the Magic Crown

And trying to be comforting and fatherly and give Fionna advice and cheer her up

He’s so clearly doing a lot better now, he’s rediscovering aspects of himself that his depression has torn away from him, he found a meaning and purpose in his life again. And it should warm my heart, and on some level it does....

But it also sends a chill down my spine knowing that this purpose that brought back the light into Simon’s eyes, the purpose he finally found is sacrificing his mind and identity again for the sake of Fionna’s happiness and her world.

He’s throwing himself right back into the miserable existence and the trauma he tries so hard to move forward from. He’s dooming himself because he honestly believes now that he’s always going to be miserable and lonely and fucked up so he might as well have be the kind of miserable and fucked up that is not lucid enough to know how miserable he is all of the time. The kind of misery that at least fits into his world.

Because he started to romanticize being the Ice King in a twisted kinda way, and now he has found the excuse to turn it into a selfless, noble act. Because the only way he feels like he’s useful and like he has worth is by protecting and helping and sacrificing himself for the sake of others.

(And like, especially in light of how he was trying to resign himself to death just moments before coming up with his plan. Not to get extremely dark, but.... suicidal people often seem to ‘get better’ just before the try to kill themselves. Because they feel like they’re finally ‘doing something’ and their misery is almost over. That kinda feels what Simon is going through right now? Becoming the Ice King again is not literally death, but it is a sort of death for Simon Petrikov’s identity.)

And this new sense of purpose in saving Fionnaworld by dooming himself is clearly blinding Simon to so many obviously telegraphed signs that this is a horrible idea.

He saw hints of just how badly Farmworld Finn has been dealing with his own Magic Crown Related Trauma

and maybe if things would’ve been different this could’ve been something they could have commiserated over. Simon could’ve had someone who understood a bit of what he has gone through, and seeing a version of Finn, of all people, face similar struggles - maybe could’ve helped him feel a little less Uniquely and Irredeemably Fucked Up. (For bonus points, they're ALSO both dealing with the grief of losing their Significant Other)

But his newfound obsession that Everything Will Be Better Once He’s Cursed again was making him totally ignore all of this.

And then there’s their little adventure in the Winter Kingdom. Which had both the Candy Queen/Princess Bubblegum as a perfect reminder of the suffering and pain involved in being trapped in the Madness of the Magic Crown

And the Winter King as a reminder of the harmful and twisted things he was capable of doing as the Ice King.

But instead he basically refused to learn any lesson from that Universe that’s not just ‘Fuck That Version of Me Specifically’ and tried to advice Fionna to do the same.

But well, while I am still worried about Simon’s mental state, his improved disposition does give me a little bit of hope. Hope that maybe he himself will notice that he is doing better and won’t be quite so eager to sacrifice his own sanity. Or maybe more likely, hope that now that he’s not just a miserable sadman screaming at their faces

Fionna and Cake are growing to appreciate Simon Petrikov for who he is and will simply refuse to let him sacrifice himself for their sake. Because, yeah, Simon tried to tell Fionna to not worry about all of that Winter Kingdom stuff, that it was just that Simon was ‘messed up’ - but since when does Fionna Campbell do what she’s told?

[zeb-z]

no ok because forevers solo mission into the nether and all the vague ‘if I don’t return’ and ‘I’m sorry’ messages he’s left behind is made all the more heart wrenching because he wasn’t meant to be the martyr.

bad has been setting himself up for tragedy. it’s in the self destructive choices he makes, his hyper paranoia, his self isolation, the way he’s literally turning blue and can’t seem to notice it himself. and from a meta perspective, it’s obvious - he talks about lasting consequences, he makes very clear framing and music decisions, the story arc has been setting up for something big. he’s got a book that says it’s for forever’s eyes only and hinted at him needing his help. he’s said to tina that he’s 100% sure of one person ending up dead at the end of all this. he’s made it clear he’d do anything he thinks would get the kids back - self sacrifice included.

it’s been an anxious build up as bad gets worse and worse. as his friends pick up clues and notice. bagi says she knows that bad lies and can cause havoc, but she’s not going to leave his side because he is too sad to be left alone. foolish takes note of his color blindness before anyone else. forever demands his time and reassures bad daily that he is there for him. gives him a flower every day. makes an entire party just showing how much bad is cared for and loved. keeps talking and visiting even when he’s ripping out his hair with annoyance because bad just won’t quit being a nuisance, or argumentative, or a probable kidnapper.

it feels like love and doomed endings. it feels like a build up to something tragic. it feels like trying to save a drowning man who won’t let anyone pull him up. because bad is ready to work for the feds, torture people, burn down anything in his way, sacrifice himself in his desperation and grief.

but now its forever who’s gone and decided any danger to himself is worth it for his son. who’s left behind vague goodbyes and see you soons, unsure if he’ll survive but set on the kids surviving at the very least. he’s already decided his death is worth it.

and while it’s not a surprise, it’s enough of a script flip to punch us all in the gut. because we expected tragedy, we expected uneasy goodbyes and self destructive choices and that effect felt across the island - but we didn’t expect it to be forever.

and neither did bad - who relied on that flower every day

[feroluce]

Lucid Dreamer (2/2)

part 1

Gepard stalls almost a week before he finally goes out to the safehouse, and it takes him a couple days to find it because Sampo didn't have the time left to be wasn't super specific about the location. But he does find it.

It's pretty bare bones, really. Gepard knows that was probably to be expected, but… It feels crushing, when he realizes there are so few personal things here. It's nothing specific to Sampo. Just some food, some medical supplies. A cot and a heater and a lot of mismatched blankets. Nothing to remember someone by.

But he does find the letters, in a metal box stashed away under the bed.

There are two for him. Three for Natasha, and two for Seele. One for Hook, one for Serval, one for Pela, one for Bronya.

Bronya's is mostly business. They knew each other from the whole Stellaron incident, but not much beyond that, and the incoming catastrophe is a more pressing matter. Seele's is actually two copies of the same letter, and Gepard realizes why when Seele is so angry she rips the first one up without reading it. He gives her the copy a couple days later, and she slinks off without a word.

Pela seems completely normal after hers is delivered, but Gepard knows better than to trust that. The next day, he finds her asleep in bed with Serval, bottles abandoned on the floor, both their eye makeup smeared and running and Pela's glasses horribly smudged and crooked on her face. Serval doesn't read hers in front of him, but she's clingy with Gepard, Pela, and Lynx for quite a while after. She throws herself into her work a lot. She insists the heater from the safehouse is busted and she needs to keep it. It's too dangerous for use by someone who's not an engineer. Might burn their house down or something. Gepard doesn't argue.

Hook's letter is short, with easy to read words. The rest of it is actually a treasure map, and she and the moles spend the next several days running through the Underground, finding hidden candy and toys. Hook asks them when Sampo is coming back, because one of the marbles she found from his map looks green, just like his eyes, and she wants to give it to him. Natasha shoos Gepard out of the clinic before he can even begin to think of an answer.

Natasha refuses to let him see what's in her letters, which ok, fine, he'll respect that. He hears from Bronya who heard from Seele who heard from Natasha herself though that one of the letters was a map and the other a catalogue, with all of Sampo's hidden "warehouses." Gepard promptly marches himself back out to the frontlines, where he can turn a blind eye. If a ton of stolen goods suddenly enters the black market, and if the orphanage and the clinic suddenly have new supplies, well, technically that's none of his business.

Gepard goes to bed, curls up under mismatched blankets and closes his eyes.

He doesn't dream.

One of Gepard's letters was also business, like Bronya's and Natasha's. He and Bronya follow everything meticulously, down to the letter, because there has to be some good to get out of all this, there has to be. Gepard can't let it all be for nothing, it would bury him.

And so the catastrophe passes. Not without casualties, and not without a lot of damage and destruction. But Belobog survives.

And after that, time just kind of…goes on. Gepard has been a part of the Silvermanes since he was old enough to enlist. The Fragmentum had gotten so much worse in the years before Welt sealed the Stellaron. He knows the statistics, it is literally his and Pela's jobs to keep track. He knows when he sees a face everyday in the camps and then it's suddenly gone. He's not unfamiliar with things like grief and loss.

He still catches himself checking the trashcans and the supply crates and soldiers' footprints sometimes, though.

But there comes a night where Gepard goes to bed, holding the mismatched blankets to his face, and he dreams. And it's strange, it's off, it sticks with him. Sampo doesn't look the same. He's thinner. His muscles have atrophied. He looks like how Gepard has seen soldiers after months in the hospital.

The most unsettling difference is there's a scar across the left side of his head, Gepard can see it over his ear, peeking out past his hairline, carving towards his cheek. Sampo is always careful about his face. Gepard once saw him dodge a Fragmentum monster and literally let it cut across his neck just to keep his face clear. He wouldn't let that happen for nothing.

Their actions in the dream itself aren't new. Sampo seems tired, run down and worn out, but he announces his presence with aplomb by lobbing a bunch of smoke bombs off the rooftops and sending his soldiers scrambling. Same shit, different day.

The new part is what he says when Gepard chases him out to the edges of the camp, tackles him into the snow. Gepard pins him to the frozen ground to detain him and Sampo doesn't even fight it, just looks up at him like he's seeing sunrise for the first time in months.

"I'll be home in one week."

[heartinportuairk]

When something you enjoy comes to an end, it can leave a hole. It's a kind of grief, and a very valid kind.

Yes, I've experienced real, actual grief in my life. In fact, this Macbeth production came along at a time when I wasn't doing all that well, due to grief and other things. The preceding couple of years had been tough, and I was tired. Emotionally exhausted.

Don't get me wrong, I have happiness in my life too. But we cling to things that remove us from reality.

When I first saw Macbeth at the Donmar in December 2023 and witnessed those opening moments for the first time, I knew I was hooked. Anyone who has seen it knows what I'm talking about. As the play progressed, you could quite literally feel it altering your brain chemistry. So, so many people who saw it went back for more, because once you've seen it, you can't just let it go. You couldn't believe it could be that good, so you had to double-check, triple-check. You couldn't possibly take it all in the first time. Or you just needed to experience again that overwhelming feeling of joy it handed to you so readily. It's a weird thing for a dark play like Macbeth to bring joy, but it really did.

It was a drug and it consumed me. I didn't just love it, I needed it. I needed to be there. I needed to look forward to the next time I could be there.

I'm not yet sad that it's ended. That I'll never again get to see it performed live on stage in front of my very own eyeballs. Maybe it's because my next fix is in sight. The cinema screenings are still to come, along with the blind hope to later be able to stream or buy it (dear god, yes please).

For now I'm still buzzing, but the come down, if and when it happens, is going to hit me hard I think.

Would they had stayed.

[randomfoggytiger]

All Things: Fellig's Fate, Scully's Immortality, and Waterston's Healing

I never subscribed to the "Scully is immortal" theory, but... there might be evidence pointing to, perhaps, a momentary brush with eternal life.

CLYDE BRUCKMAN'S FINAL REPOSE

"All right. So how do I die?"

"You don't."

Two infamous lines from an infamous episode.

Setting aside Darin Morgan's thoughts on the matter (that this was a kindness on Bruckman's part, not foreshadowing), the show has, thus far, provided no through line for immortality to be considered a possible end goal.

Until Season 6.

TITHONUS

Fellig was cursed with immortality after callously hoping Death would take the life of an innocent-- one who was trying to save him-- in his place. The episode showcased his barren existence and empty, unending eternity with a punctuated, nihilistic statement: "Seventy-five years is enough. Take my word for it. You live forever... sooner or later, you start to think about the big thing you're missing and that everybody else gets to find out about but you....  Love lasts seventy-five years, if you're lucky. You don't want to be around when it's gone."

But Fellig was not blessed, nor did he bless others, with love-- an endeavor of sacrifice and respect-- while he lived. More rotations around the sun hadn't worked on that deadened part of himself until he put aside his own goals (quite literally setting his camera aside) to humanely address the tragedy unfolding in front of him (Scully dying.) Even then, not without selfish intent-- hoping to pry the jaws of Death from its newest victim and turn them onto himself.

This leads us to the crux: was Scully given immortality?

Let's presume yes, for this theory. In that case, Fellig's expressions while Death stood over her, her expression after Mulder's rationalizations at her bedside, and the lessons she had yet to learn before all things add up to a grim picture that neatly mirrors her personal journey.

Fellig stopped taking her photograph because he saw an opportunity previous victims hadn't "offered": Death had taken an unusual interest in Scully. Fellig's face changed as he lowered the camera, demanding "Did you see him?" until Scully gave a dazed acknowledgment of some kind-- implying that Scully, like Fellig, saw Death as she lay dying; and Fellig knew it. (But did Scully see Death? That appears to be left up for interpretation-- did she write off what she saw later, or was she blind to Death's presence and thought Fellig was projecting his perceptions or delusions onto her?) Obeying the photographer's instruction (because she believed him, which she half-confesses in the hospital), Scully closed her eyes and lived while Fellig, finally, died.

At Scully's bedside she admitted to but brushed aside her immortality concerns ("You know, Mulder, I don't even know how I entertained the thought. People don't live forever.") However, Mulder's assertion-- "No, I think he would have. I just think that, that death only looks for you... once you seek its opposite"-- destroyed her rationalizations and leaves us, the audience, with similar, unanswered questions.

Death seems discriminatory. But why?

Since Emily, we've known that Scully fears attachment to others-- to life, in a own way-- because of her disruptive childhood. Tithonus pointed out those correlating factors between herself and solitary, loveless Fellig: although his form of detachment is ruthlessly different than hers-- considering human attachments a drag rather than a source of comfort or strength-- both model a form of distancing self-preservation.

If that be the case, the immortality theory could be viewed in a new light: that Death teaches lessons hand-in-glove with Life. Life would give others the chance to attach and learn and grow together while Death would be the respite from those lessons and pains and griefs. And, more importantly, that Death would deny itself to those who haven't learned and grown in Life. Perhaps a concept not dissimilar to Scully's Catholic purgatory, or perhaps one that aligns with the return of restless or reincarnated souls. Perhaps both.

ALL THINGS

all things is the culmination of Scully's advance-and-retreat to life, addressing her choices, doubts, coping mechanisms, and relationships. And while I posit it was necessary for her and Mulder to have started a romantic relationship in order to kickoff the episode's moral crisis (post here), I concede that Tithonus and its ripple effects would still echo behind each step she took regardless of the status of her partnership.

Not only that, but all things also smacks of the more personal aspects of Mulder's and Scully's cases littering Season 6. The episodes following Fight the Future address the irreparable bond of their partnership, from The Beginning to Field Trip; but, more importantly, Season 6 wove Fate-- others' and their own-- into each case: those who were doomed to its inevitability and those who accepted its inevitability in order to change it. Monday's Pam is the prime example of inevitable Fate, but Drive's doomed Crumps and Triangle's lost crew members and Dreamland's disrupted men-in-black and How the Ghosts Stole Christmas's cursed ghosts and S.R. 819's controlled Skinner and One Son's burnt conspirators and Agua Mala's isolated Dales and Arcadia's terrified neighborhood and Alpha's lupus-ed Berquist and Trevor's superpowered Rawls and Milagro's heartless Padgett and etc. all fill the spectrum between Pam's helpless victimization and Fellig's self-victimization. Mulder and Scully were directly affected by these victims: Tithonus was to Scully what Monday was to Mulder; and The Unnatural through Amor Fati was to him what Amor Fati through all things was to her.

We know that Fate has its fatal way with Mulder and Scully's life. Mulder often states (during moods of higher inclination) that their quest is fated, and Scully often saves herself or her partner from various impossible situations. (If one subscribes to The Field Where I Died, she also releases them from a reincarnation cycle-- post here.)

all things itself draws a fated comparison between Scully's choices and Mulder's presence, even in absentia. He is the choice she must make; or lose him, and herself, forever in the annals of some forgotten record book in some secluded library remembered sparsely every few decades. And Scully is deeply afraid of losing herself (to Mulder's quest or through her own choices), at first incorrectly hiding from that fear in Daniel's comfort and their rose-colored past.

In that light, this episode achieves quite a few aims under the umbrella of personal freedom. Scully is enlightened, leading to her spiritual and personal freedom; that enlightenment leads her to embrace life, honoring the choices she made with regards to the men of her past and present; and that embrace allows her to break the chains Fellig passed on to her. She is ready to live-- "death only looks for you once you seek its opposite"-- and die.

A SECONDARY SPECULATION: PASSING ON IMMORTALITY

I have one last thing to posit: Death found in Fellig what Fellig discovered in Scully; and Scully purged herself of that element-- and her immortality-- whilst saving Daniel Waterston's life.

Fate, again, comes to the fore: Mulder sent Scully on an errand for his case-- a loop to Never Again's disgruntled feelings and "orders"-- but that informant taught Scully how to heal herself and "let go." Scully was subsequently drawn to spiritual healing, and brought in a healer to save Waterston before he succumbed to his heart condition.

Spiritual healing, in this case, becomes another word for Death's lesson: thwarting Fate by accepting it. Fellig threw away his life and his happiness by first sacrificing someone else's, Scully was given immortality through Fellig's sacrifice, Colleen Azar saved her own life from self-destruction; and Daniel Waterston is given a second chance because of Fellig, Scully, and Colleen's shared lesson and redemption. And thus, we arrive at the moment of Daniel Waterston's recovery-- or, rather, the moment Scully's immortality is passed on to Daniel, miraculous healing included.

all things ends on the conclusion to Scully's arc, not Waterston's; but reconciliation and change loom largely in the form of his daughter Maggie. If Death is giving Daniel Waterston a second chance, it's up to him to turn it from a curse to a blessing.

However, there's a hitch to this theory: the nurse held Fellig's hand, and Fellig held Scully's hand while immortality played hot potato from one person to the next. all things lacks a scene where Scully passes along her immortality by touch to Daniel Waterston (except their brief contact before his cardiac arrest and after his spiritual healing.) However, the immortality exchanges in Tithonus differ in the minutiae-- the knowledge of the people involved, the health of the people involved, the cooperation of the people involved-- and leave us without any concrete "method" point to. Other than, of course, the reality that Death and Fellig were playing their own game with its own rules; and that Scully's immortality only fits into their picture if she is able to play the same game and beat it. Daniel Waterston squeezes into the final rounds only by a technicality; and his entry could still be debated to the end of time.

POSSIBLE STIPULATIONS

Death, in Tithonus at least, appears to be an impartial agent, passing immortality to the person currently avoiding his eyes. In that case, he would be a neutral-- even malignant-- figure rather than one teaching Dickensian ghost lessons. Death takes life and leaves decay without mercy, burying both the nurse and the photographer eventually.

Yet, we are given this perspective by Fellig himself, a man who views Death as a toying entity.

Separate from Fellig's observations, Death is depicted as a fair but clever judge, one who spares and punishes lives equally. Further, Mulder's examination of Death's motives implies one dark and one redemptive side: "death only looks for you once you seek its opposite" would be inconceivable to a man like Alfred Fellig but could be understood and changed by a woman like Dana Scully.

Fellig's brush with Death began with the barter of one woman's life, bringing to light the cold, calculated part of his personality. He continued to exist in that darkness until one unselfish act foisted his curse upon another woman. Scully, by comparison, internalized the lesson her predecessor avoided most of his unnatural life, and saved herself and another embittered man in the process.

If coincidences are coincidences, why do they feel so contrived?

CONCLUSION

Immortality in The X-Files is either a curse or a kindness, a multidimensional consequence of one's choices and fate.

Fellig, a man consumed by his own motives, viewed it as a cruel, cyclical punishment of Death's. Scully used it as a tool to break her own cycles, save Daniel Waterston, and set herself free. Daniel-- perhaps now similarly cursed-- might have used it to move beyond his own moral failings; or succumbed, again, to the cycle of his own making.

Death, Life, and Fate are the essence of The X-Files's existence, the tools by which its world and characters are shaped. Those who wish to circumvent them are chastised. Those who work alongside them are rewarded. And those who persevere with righteous action and truthful intent despite them are awarded a new path forward.

Thanks for reading~

Enjoy!

[babyangelsky]

Color Moments in Two Worlds Episode 5

THE COLORS WERE COLORING SO HARD THIS WEEK. They really hammered home the warm and the cool of it all and it's incredibly significant. @respectthepetty the colors can't hide from us anymore!

We had Tai and Kram growing ever closer in their matching warm colors surrounded by blue.

We met sad little baby Tai who missed his mother so much and was absolutely being swallowed by grief and blue every time we saw him.

In another heartbreaking flashback, we saw the day Tai found his Kram after he'd been mortally wounded by Por. Kram died in Tai's arms wearing yellow.

In his continuing bid for BL Father of the Year, Por stabbed his son and tied him to a stake the same way he did to Kram last episode. And like Kram, Tai was in a warm color.

We went back to yellow Khumfah to get help from Phupha to rescue Tai. Phupha almost disappointed me but he came through.

Jao is okay! And he's still in his plaid so he's double okay!

The blue plaid once again matches Wayu and the little bit of red in it matches the little bit of red stitching on Kram's shirt, so actually he's triple okay.

Also worth noting that the red stitching is on the same side and approximate location as Tai's stab wound.

As Tai holds his father at gunpoint, we get a flashback to the first time Tai, wearing blue, held some at gunpoint under his father's guidance.

After Por dies, Tai loses his color and warmth.

But only until Kram quite literally gives it back to him...

...and they kiss under the blinding light of love.

Up until now, the colors in this show haven't meant only one thing and this episode was no different. They're still showing connections but they're also showing emotions and the lack of emotions especially.

The warm colors we see are safety and hope and love and the blue we see is the absence of it. The blue is the cold that's left behind once the warmth is gone.

Poor baby Tai seemed to be permanently swallowed by blue after his mother passed away and the only time he isn't is when he's looking at a photo of her and the warm lamp light is illuminating him.

The photo itself is a source of warmth as well. His mother had blonde hair and there are orange and yellow flowers on her dress. Even the background is warm.

There is even the tiniest bit of warmth on Por, who has yellow stripes on his dark shirt.

And it matters that he does and it matters that all this warmth is finally breaking through the blue because this is the first time Por is humanized to his son. This is the first time that Tai sees his father grieving his mother's death, the first time he sees Por cry for her.

In all these flashbacks we saw, this is the only time we see Por have a genuine shared moment of connection with his son. Tai hugs him and Por allows it. He allows himself to reach out and hold Tai and this is the memory that Tai recounts to Kram after they leave flowers on Por's grave. This memory and this moment is why he feels sad about losing Por despite everything that man did.

Por lost his warmth when he lost his wife. This hug is probably the very last vestige of it and there was never any more. Tai might've gone down the same road and stayed cold and unloved forever, but he met Kram.

Kram gave him the warmth he lost when his mother died, and although he lost it a second time when he lost his Kram, another version of Kram came into his life and warmed him up again.

[md-confessions]

sort of in response to that one ask about doll not being 'uzi if she never met n.'

both her and uzi were changed through grief and disconnect from their peers even if it showed in different ways. both of them have themes of loneliness & both of them have an intense festering hatred that fuels their motivations.

the difference between them is that through the connections that uzi formed after being forced into a situation where she had to open up, she deterred herself from the path she was slowly going down.

like her quote en quote villain arc was stopped before it started because of the connection she formed with N but doll never had that.

doll refused to form connections despite the chances she was given because it happened too late. her anger festered for so long that she wasn't able to make a comeback. her hubris was her downfall. she became the very thing she sought to destroy.

the point of promening and her 'hypocritical murder plan' was that she was so blinded by her anger and hatred, she didn't really think too far about the logics of her plan; she probably fantasized killing v and then took the first chance she could to actually do it.

she has some kind of tunnel vision, focusing on her goals until she's gotten them; no matter the cost, no matter who or what she has to get through. (another similarity between her and uzi, imo.)

Uzi basically stated "hey we should stop fighting cause there's bigger shit at play and we can deal with it better if we team up" and Doll responded with "No I can do this on my own also die"

sort of. imagine you spend years upon years seething and imagining ways you're going to kill this sky demon that killed your parents in front of you and lead to the activation of a virus that has plagued you for years since that point. you have to actively kill and eat people from a young age & you are alone in your struggles; presumably the singular person who is aware of them finds your trauma humorous to an extent, and even if she sticks by your side, you feel like she doesn't really get it. i reiterate; you are alone in your struggles.

one day, you finally get your chance. you fantasize this moment for years, to the point where it becomes the only plausible solution to your problems. you don't plan it out thoroughly, because you know the universe will deal its hand correctly and allow you catharsis after years of festering that hatred. it finally happens. you have her in your sights, you have her pinned, she knows who you are now and you're about to kill her, to inflict all the pain on her you have wanted to for years; no matter who may have gotten in your way, you will have this, it's all you want, its all you HAVE wanted.

and then someone stops you. she tells you some things that if you were in a clearer mind, you would have thought deeper about, but you're so fucking angry right now and you want her to get out of the way. you don't listen.

you fight. you lose. you come back.

she has the same virus as you. you're not alone anymore. and that's when the conflicting feelings start. but despite that start, they never quite come to any meaningful conclusion because you have more important things to do. perhaps she inspired you a little to understand that the fate of the planet is more important than your fantasy for revenge, but you're so set in your ways you can't quite admit it yet. and again; when you get that chance again, to enact revenge, you take it.

and in the end, it ruined her & she died. she died as she lived; alone.

essentially, 'doll is uzi if she never met n' doesn't mean that exactly; it means doll is uzi if she never formed meaningful connections. the friends she had in school don't count in my eyes. literally the very first proper interaction we see between her and lizzy is lizzy playing doll's traumatic experience off as a joke. no hate towards lizzy also just to specify i love them as friends i just don't think it is on the same level of healthy as n and uzis friendship is?

okay.. i can't add any more to this it's so fucking long also it's 1 am GOODNIGHT i hope this doesn't look weird or aggressive

.

[ranger-ribbons]

Power Rangers Ninja Storm Headcanons

Content warning: canon typical violence, canonical character death, mentioned child death, show spoilers

~

Kanoi Watanabe promised his wife that Cam wouldn't be a ninja, but still trained his son with a ninja's fighting style. He also found someone to train his son in the ways of a samurai after she died to honor his late wife

Cam is homeschooled, which is partly why he's so awkward around people who aren't his family or his friends (his team)

Dustin's comic book collection is vast and extensive. He has a massive amount of Power Rangers, DC, and Marvel, but also small-time comics. He also watches anime and reads manga

Shane got into skateboarding because his parents were always busy and never had time to run him anywhere, so he started skateboarding so he could take himself

Shane, Dustin, and Tori are childhood friends, they met when they were in grade school and have remained besties ever since

Cam's issue with the Wind Ninja Rangers wasn't that they're late or underperforming, it's that he knows Rangering is a dangerous business and he didn't want to get attached to Shane, Tori, and Dustin, and then lose someone else he cares about

Cam's birthday is a sensitive subject for him, he never feels like celebrating, because his mother died on the day he turned six

Cam keeps the amulet to honor his mother, but also because he's grown accustomed to wearing something around his neck. Before he, Blake, and Hunter went to retrieve their Ranger powers, Cam actually bought a jade pendant to wear around his neck just to alleviate the strange feeling of not having his mother's amulet with him

Blake and Hunter knew deep inside their hearts that Lothor was lying to them from the start, but they were blinded by grief and anger and couldn't listen to their instincts

Dustin is an "airhead" and this leads to him forgetting things more than once, which is why if it's something common or forgotten often, Tori and Shane care spares with them everywhere

Dustin has ADHD

Shane, Dustin, and Tori would kill for Cam if asked or given half a chance, Cam is their favorite person (besides each other and their s/os) and they're highly protective of him, even after he becomes a Ranger

The Ninja Rangers keep a special eye on the other Ninja teams and also the Samurai team, not because they're jealous or anything but because they're ready to jump in and help if necessary

Cam trained both Antonio Garcia and Levi Weston, he's protective of them and is always happy to take their calls. He can and has dismissed classes early when they call during those classes

The reason Cam didn't get sucked up with the rest of the school is because the Power had already chosen him. The Power protects its chosen Rangers, so Cam wasn't taken with the school when it was sucked up into the air

It took Blake and Hunter forty-five minutes to capture Cam when they went to get Kanoi. Cam doesn't hold it over their heads, but he will on occasion mention it when they're particularly cocky or arrogant (ie.: "It took you forty-five minutes to capture a regular, everyday ninja while in your morphed forms, I don't think you should talk about being 'the greatest ninja ever.'")

Cam is the youngest of the team, being a year younger than the other Rangers. Hunter is the oldest at 19, then Tori, Shane, Blake, and Dustin at 18, then Cam at 17

Hunter already graduated high school and Cam has graduated college (genius that he is), but Shane, Dustin, Tori, and Blake all graduated between Scent of a Ranger and I Love Lothor

Shane, Tori, and Dustin are Soulmates, platonic or not. Other Soulmates include: Shane and Dustin, Tori and Blake, and Hunter and Cam

Shane, Tori, Dustin, and Cam have a trauma bond, they're also quite literally ride or die, fuck with them at your own risk

Cam can and has made surveillance footage around Ninja Ops disappear when asked bribed

Blake and Hunter were adopted at the same time and have known each other since they were infants

Blake and Hunter are also wary around water, as their element is electricity

Cam both does and doesn't have a ninja element. The Wind Ninja Academy teaches the way of the Air, Earth, and Water Ninja while the Thunder Academy has a Lightning Ninja specialty, but there's no way to teach the element of Energy

Tori was Shane's original second-in-command, but once Hunter and Blake joined the team, Tori stepped back and let Hunter take his place as the second-in-command

The Wind and Thunder Morphers would be disguised as bracelets, but the Rangers never asked how to disguise them, and Cam thinks it's funny to watch them walk around with big bulky equipment on their wrists.

[Warning: child death] Cam, Kapri, and Marah are related in blood. Lothor and Kanoi had an older sister who left the family the second she turned 18 and hasn't been heard from since. The only way they knew she was still alive was Kapri and Marah's existence. Kara Watanabe, unfortunately, died in childbirth trying to deliver Kapri and Marah's baby brother, neither she nor the baby survived

Shane, Dustin, and Tori all moved to California, which is why Shane and Tori didn't think Power Rangers were real outside of comics

Dustin has a cat, Junebug. She's a grey-and-white tabby with bright green eyes. Dustin found her on the side of the road as a kid and he brought her with him to California

Cam would love to own a snake, but Kanoi has never liked snakes and Cam doesn't have time to care for one. That being said, the other Rangers get him one for his birthday and promise to help him care for the little thing. It's a beautiful yellow boa and Cam adores him. His name is Banana (courtesy of his former owner) and Cam can often be found wearing the snake around his neck or on his arm when he's not teaching a class

Cam earned a nickname only the Rangers are allowed to use for him: Camera. This is due to his exceptional work with recording devices and picture-taking. Others can try to use this nickname and Cam will either not respond, or flip said person depending on his mood

[420thewritersroom]

Thunderstorms in Spring

~Welp, just as fast as I posted that first installment, now we have a second one! I didn't expect everyone to like the first one so much, and I wanna thank you guys for your loving words! And the previous piece honestly gave me so much work to go off on that I decided to continue with a sequel (will this become a possible series, idk, but there's a second one now, so who knows).~

~I, once again, want to thanks the artists in this community who made their pieces of White Haired!Raiden and contributed to the whole "Oops, Kung Lao's Dead Again" AU, you can find them credited in the previous post since I don't want to annoy them with constantly tagging them whenever I make another installment with this series lol.~

~Before we continue just wanted to put some mild context to ensure this makes sense. Fire God Liu Kang starts getting deja vu as certain coincidences and events start playing out that are too eerily similar to how things played out during the MK9 game. All roads were seemingly leading to Kung Lao dying in his timeline, and Liu Kang struggled with how to cope and deal with this. On one hand, he did not want his friend-…His new teacher…To die, especially since he tried so hard to tailor-make this timeline to ensure everyone got a happy ending.

Yet, at the same time, he refused to stoop down to Kronika's level and start altering the timeline until it was his "perfect" utopia. However, his fears and suspicion about the situation become even more realized when Raiden gets gravely injured, and the only thing that prevented him from kneeling over was the thunder amulet infused with his person (and some other magical shit, idk). From this, Raiden gains his iconic white hair, and this gives Liu Kang a heart attack. To make a long story short, Kung Lao ends up dying at the hands of the villains, Raiden is going through the stages of grief, but he's going down the same dark path as the previous Raiden, now becoming Dark Raiden. And Liu Kang has to finally interfere.~

Still confused? Too late, now on to the story!

Previous // Next

Wilted Cherry Blossoms, Dark Thunderstorms, Burning Hopes: Remastered

Characters: Raiden, Raiden's Sister (Fuji), Johnny Cage, Kenshi, Mentions of Kung Lao, Liu Kang, Madam Bo, and Jax

Word Count - 8,001 (wow!)

Ships: Johnny/Kenshi - Past Raiden/Kung Lao

Warnings: Canon Typical Violence (with less blood), Heavy Talks About Character Death

~The Netherrealms - Undisclosed time and place~

Sulfur, ash, smoke, burning stone, and landscapes; the smell of the Netherrealm. Although Raiden's memories are fuzzy at best and nonexistent at worst, he remembers this in near clarity. His vision presents him looking up at the hellish sky as if he's lying down on the ground. He remembers not moving; it's too painful to move. He remembers breathing heavily. Is it because of the suffocating air of the Netherrealms? Or perhaps because of the blinding pain that Raiden remembers experiencing.

He can remember not just hissing and groaning in pain but screaming and writhing-silently begging for it to end. In this mnemonic dream, everything was selective when it came to what he saw, heard, smelled, and tasted. For taste, he can taste the iron of his own blood mixed in with something foul. Could it be the rancid air or the fact that this mixture almost tasted like poison?

His hearing in this dream is quite literally selective. Some people sounded horribly muffled, requiring Raiden to strain his ears to hear them. Others, he could perceive with great clarity, and then there were those he could not hear at all, their lips moving with no audible sound. Then there was his sight. Like the other senses, Raiden was faced with blurred faces, some only possessing one discernable feature, such as their eyes, nose, mouths, ears, hair, etc. Others were completely faceless to Raiden, with only their speech or smell being the one thing Raiden could cling to.

But what often overrode all these senses was the overwhelming pain he felt at this moment. Three figures stood above him. One was featureless; the only distinguishing aspect of this entity was that they were female-presenting as their speech sounded feminine, but it was horribly dimmed. Another figure was only distinguishable thanks to the glowing eyes they possessed and distinct dragon tattoos that crawled up their arms. If Raiden concentrates, he can maybe recollect what this individual is saying, but this pain prevents him from doing so.

Then there was Kung Lao. Deadass, just his long-time best friend, Kung Lao. Out of all the figures in front of Raiden in this instance, Kung Lao-he could see and hear with such perspicuity. Kung Lao stood beside the lying Raiden, tears in his eyes, slurring his speech, holding tightly to the thunder wielders' shaking hand.

"It's ok, Raiden! It's ok, you're going to be ok!" Kung Lao sobbed, trying, but failing, to smile at Raiden despite his tears actively gracing Raiden's face.

Raiden doesn't remember if he said anything back to him. His sight throughout this scene remained on his friend…At least, he thinks they're friends. There's a foreign feeling that encompasses him whenever he looks at Lao, and it's an overwhelming sense of love. And, I mean, people can definitely love their best friends. He and Kung Lao had known each other since they were children. Lao was a reckless, poor kid, and Raiden was a boy from a well-off family. Despite their class differences, they saw something likable about the other. But this love was more than just having a natural affinity for someone he's known all his life.

This felt…Stronger? Louder? Raiden doesn't know how to describe it. If it wasn't for the pain, Raiden would get lost in Kung Lao's chocolate eyes. He would untie his short ponytail and play with his hair before readjusting his look. Raiden notices little details about his friend that others might not have picked up on. Like his dimples when he smiles, even under such stressful circumstances, the way his face piercings adds to his cocky personality, and his undercut brings back fond memories of the pair trying to learn how to cut his hair which ended disastrously. Raiden wanted…To kiss him dearly…

And just like how Raiden held his perspective on Lao, Kung Lao hasn't torn away his gaze on Raiden, spitting out promises of what they will do together once Raiden was right as rain in rapid fire. What ended up redirecting Kung Lao's attention was when the figure with the glowing eyes was mumbling something.

"What?" Kung Lao snaps his head over to the tattooed figure with hopeful confusion on his face.

This tattooed individual, Raiden could not understand fully. However, he was able to catch on to some words: Amulet, Raiden, Entity, and Consequences. The fully faceless being, who was also present, gestures as if they're conversing with the pair - but Raiden cannot hear their input on the matter.

"I don't care how you do it! I…I just want him to survive! Please, Liu! Save him! Save Raiden!" Kung Lao cries, holding onto Raiden's hand like his life depended on it. As if, if he didn't clutch onto Raiden, he would lose him forever.

The tattooed individual holds their gaze toward Kung Lao, their silence and body language hinting that they were…Uneased and uncertain. The tattooed looks at the feminine figure and nods, saying something in the mumbled jargon they spoke. But the three individuals in front of Raiden were all in agreement. They were going to save him. He was going to survive this…Somehow.

Kung Lao focuses back on Raiden, smiling at his downed friend. "Look at me. Look at me, Raiden. You're going to be alright! Liu is gonna help ya. You…" Kung Lao looks Raiden over, primarily where his stomach is. Why was he looking there? "You're going to be alright. I love you. I love you so much, and I'm not going to let you die, ok?"

Raiden feels his heart flutter as if Kung Lao said something that would've usually made the thunder wielder swoon. But what was it? Despite being able to understand everything Kung Lao was telling him, his dream censored him; twice it did. Raiden feels something swell within him, this desire to respond to Kung Lao. Words at the tip of his tongue that he wanted to get out.

But then the pain gets worse. A LOT worse. His body was on fire as if electricity was coursing through his body. Raiden screams, making sounds that one would not think a human could make. He writhes, so much so that he feels someone holding him down. He remembers wanting it to stop; that dying was a better alternative than enduring this much pain.

-

Raiden jolts awake, sitting upright, sweaty, and breathing heavily. His eyes roam about his room, taking stock of what's around him. It was just a dream. He's in his room, in his bed. Not in…That hellish place…Whatever that was. Yet, he's not calming down. It felt real, too real. The pain, the heat, the people talking to him. It was as if he experienced it before, and there was a part of himself that felt like it was factual. But it was so…Surreal…

"Ugh! Aaah!" Raiden clutches his stomach, where his lower and upper body meet. It's happening again.

He can feel static dancing off his person in painful waves, coursing through his body from his stomach. He doubles over as he clutches his stomach in a hugging position. He can feel it wanting to get out again, this strange, unknown power, as it swells in electric prowess, begging to be let out.

"Raiden? Raiden!" Fuji's voice sounds distant, yet tangible, as she rushes to her brother's side. "Raiden, what's wrong? Is it happening aga-ah!" Fuji feels a jolt of electricity shock her, and she pulls away from touching her brother.

Raiden hisses through the growing pain, "Y-yes, it's happening again! It's stronger this time!"

"Come on, let's get you outside!" Fuji says in a hurried tone as she quickly dresses herself in whatever she can get her hands on in her brother's room.

Raiden groans as he tries to remove himself from his bed (something he kinda doesn't want to do right now) but ends up rolling off the mattress onto the floor with an audible grunt. Fuji is quick to Raiden's side again and helps him up with all her strength. Despite having a sleeper build in terms of muscularity and being leanly built, he was heavy to carry and drag around for someone of her strength and stature.

"Come on, come on, let's go, Raiden! We're almost to the door; let's go!" Fuji tries to encourage her brother.

"I-I'm trying, Ji. It hurts!" Raiden whines.

They both get past the front door and rush to hop onto Fuji's motorbike (she saved up ALOT of money to get this baby). She revs the engine and speeds away down the road, biking to a remote area so that her brother can let out…Whatever the fuck is going on with him.

"We're almost out of here, Raiden! Just give me-HOLY SHIT!"

Suddenly, an arc of lightning strikes the ground, deadly close to them. It's only now that Fuji notices that the night cloudy skies above were crackling with thunder and lightning (fortunately, no rain…Yet…).

"Raiden, control yourself! Just give me 2 minutes! AAH!" Fuji dodges a lightning strike that landed 3 seconds ahead of them.

"I'M TRYING!" Raiden shouts in pain, his hair and eyes glowing intensely as the power of the amulet strengthens. Throughout the trip, Raiden KNOWS that he was unintentionally shocking his sister, the poor farm boy constantly apologizing as he tries to reign in the energies coming off him.

Fuji is able to bob & weave around the constant lightning strikes and endure the shocks her brother kept giving her, just enough to reach not just the outskirts of the village but into the remote parts outside their settlement. Once they were a good 15 minutes away from Fengjian, Fuji slows down to park her bike, but this would nearly cost her. As they were about to stop, another strike of lightning hits them from behind, kicking up dirt, debris, and their bike. The motorbike ends up being tipped forward forcefully, sending the siblings flying.

"AAAAHHH!" Fuji screams as she soars above the ground before crashlanding into the tall grass nearby. Although she didn't gain that much air, thanks to her slowing down not too long ago, she still felt her ears ringing and her head and muscles aching. She makes sharp gasps as she slightly rolls in pain.

"Damnit, Raiden," Fuji hisses. "Fuck, Raiden! Raiden?" Fuji picks herself up, almost losing her footing, as she frantically looks for her older brother.

The sounds of her brother screaming gave her an idea of where he was at. He wasn't too far from her. Fuji could see lighting bouncing off his person as he was in the fetal position. As Fuji was attempting to approach him, Raiden yelled out to her, "DON'T COME ANY CLOSER!"

Fuji immediately stops in her tracks, watching her brother uselessly as he suffered. Ever since he came back home a year and a half ago, ever since Liu Kang dropped her brother off at their family home, he's had these strange abilities. But nothing like this. It has never gotten this bad! It's gotten out of control. Whatever's happening to Raiden, it's trying to get out. Fuji anxiously scours through her brain as she considers WHAT she can do to help her brother that she hasn't done before. But…BUT WHAT THE FUCK WOULD ANYONE DO IN THIS SITUATION!?! Her brother is becoming a malfunctioning transmission tower! No amount of guidance from their parents, friends, workmates, or even TikTok inspiration posts could prepare her to handle this!

There is one thing she notices about her brother in this situation. It's almost as if he's trying to hold back whatever this electrifying beast is. This gives her an idea.

"R-Raiden! Raiden, you need to let go! You can't keep holding back…Whatever this is!" Fuji shouts as loud as she can, the raging thunder clouds, cracks of lightning, and howling wind overpowering her voice.

"NO!" Raiden screams in response, fear heavily apparent in his tone. "I-FUCK-I'LL HURT YOU! LIKE LAST TIME, I'LL HURT YOU!"

Oh…

Fuji stares uselessly at Raiden as that incident plays in her head again. It was a couple months since Liu Kang returned her brother home. Raiden was…He was going through alot. What, with his sudden memory loss and having to come to terms with the lost memories, Raiden was silently coping with this alone. It's unnatural for him to bottle up his emotions. Fuji has always known her brother to speak his mind when something troubled him…Then again, his trusted confidant when he didn't want to turn to his family was Kung Lao…Who's dead…Even Madam Bo he couldn't look to for guidance; she died many years ago (peacefully, surrounded by her family). And despite the natural trust, as siblings, they both had for each other; Raiden clearly avoided speaking with her about what he was thinking and feeling.

And it finally came overhead when the siblings had a mild dispute. She doesn't even remember what they were arguing about. Could've been typical brother/sister shit. Maybe she finally confronted him about his silence and reluctance to speak about what had happened to him. Regardless, things got a bit personal, and Raiden, who is usually the patient and calm one, even during their little disagreement bouts; lashed out.

And quite literally did he lashed out. Fuji probably should've seen the telltale signs when his eyes and hair were giving a dim, white glow, but she was too riled up in the conversation to pay attention. Then it happened, Raiden yelled back at her, and suddenly, an arc of lightning erupted from him. Striking Fuji.

With a highly concentrated energy of electricity, it shocked her to the point that her body shut down temporarily…But Raiden didn't see it like that, at the moment. His sister, his closest friend aside from Kung Lao, was lying on the kitchen floor, dead. Their elderly parents arrived home to see Raiden sobbing loudly as he tried to revive his sister while lightning was pulsing off him. They couldn't get close enough to each reach the phone to call for emergency services as arcs of lightning were going everywhere in the house, practically destroying it (the expenses were much, even for their family). And maybe it was the constant shock of electricity that restarted Fuji and kept her from fully kneeling over. Who knows, there was a lot of pandemonium going on at that moment, but she remembered jolting back to life, breathing heavily as she tried to scoot away from her brother.

But there was one thing she regretted that day. Being so scared of Raiden that she had the look of someone seeing a monster, a threat.

Fuji can ascertain that he's been holding it in ever since that day. Because he's scared of hurting her again. And sure, they would both go out of town to a remote area to let Raiden air out and release the energies of the amulet infused to his body. But there was a deafening disconnect since that day. And it pains Fuji that it wasn't until now that she realized she'd shut Raiden out because she was scared of her brother.

Another painful cry emits from Raiden. The storms above were becoming dangerous, Fuji felt like she was going to be swept off her feet by the roaring winds. Although Fuji was scared of the mystical prowess her brother possessed, she loved him more than she feared him.

"Raiden, you're not going to hurt me! I know you won't, I trust that you won't!" Fuji has to now scream over the raging storm as she puts some further distance between her and her brother, readjusting her fallen motorbike. "Whatever you're holding on to, you have to let it go!"

"Fuji, I-"

"Raiden, don't you fucking argue with me!" Fuji shouts, using her "mom voice." Fuji might be just as soft-spoken as her brother, but she knew when to assert herself and take up space when needed. "You're going to harm me far worse the longer you keep holding on to...Well, that! You'll destroy all of Fengjian doing what you're doing RIGHT NOW!"

I mean, Fuji can't say for certain that it will. But storms like this can definitely level villages, and she's not about to wait and find out if this is the case. Fuji yelps loudly as a soaring large tree branch flies by her, the dark-haired sister ducking behind her bike for safety. There's another resounding scream from Raiden, and she looks in his direction with extreme worry. However, there was something different about this scene.

Raiden was howling, sure, but he was releasing the energies of the amulet. The best way one could describe this scene is that it's like watching Raiden raise his power level as if he's a Dragon Ball Z character. The storm around this time worsens, so much so that Fuji ends up holding onto her, albeit skidding, bike while screaming herself.

Then it...Stops...The roiling thunder, the crack of lightning, the raging winds calmed. Fuji opens her eyes and looks to the still-night sky, the dark clouds slowly parting to reveal the gibbous moon above, the sound of thunder now becoming an infrequent presence. When she finally takes a look at her brother...She might as well be looking at an all-powerful being, maybe even a god.

Raiden was levitating, hair and clothes flowing as if he were in water, sparks of electricity visibly coursing through his being as his hair and eyes glowed a godly white. Fuji stared in awe as electric energies sparked off him, unsure of how else to take in this scene in front of her. Her brother would soon gracefully touch the ground again before kneeling over. Fuji cautiously approaches her brother as if she's entering an emperor's throne room unannounced.

"...Raiden?"

"...Yeah?" Raiden, now sounding like his usual, soft-spoken, self, looks up at his sister. His face plastered with the same amazement as she possessed.

"Are you...Ok?"

"I think so," Raiden looks himself over, watching the energies pulse around him. "...Yeah. Yeah, I think I'm alright now."

"What was that? This never happened before." Fuji starts getting more bold as she approaches her brother. She wanted to dust him down but hesitated as the energies continued to encompass Raiden.

Raiden is quiet for a moment. During this silence, the electrical current finally dissipated. "...I'm sorry, Fuji."

"For what?"

"For...For everything."

Fuji's heart nearly breaks the moment she hears Raiden's voice crack. Raiden's eyes become glassy as he begins to cry. "No. No, Raiden," Fuji takes the first step to break the space between them, holding his shaking hand in hers. "I should be the one apologizing. I...I'm not going to pretend that I know what happened to you that caused all this. These strange powers, you're new color," Fuji brushes some stray hair behind Raiden's ear, "Or why you can't remember the past...I don't even know how many years."

"But you clearly needed help. I can't assist with any physical help, but I can help with this," Fuji pokes at his heart, smiling at her elder brother. "I was scared of you, Raiden...Because you became...Unrecognizable to me. But I was wrong to emotionally shut you out. You're still my brother, and I'm going to still be your sister."

Raiden chuckles, smiling through his tears as he fondly looks at Fuji. "Thank you, sis."

"Now come on, we best get home. Mom and Dad, if they're not awake already, are going to be worried about why we were gone during an active storm. Also, you're still in your underwear."

"What?" Raiden looks at himself, finally realizing that he's still in a t-shirt and boxers. "W-why didn't you help me get dressed!?!"

"You were literally screaming and shooting lightning out of your hands, what did you want me to do?" Fuji responds as she gets her motorbike prepped for departure.

"I would've been fine with a hoodie or something," Raiden says, now in a bit of a jesting mood. He does notice that his sister is wearing his clothes and points at her. "Can you at least hand me my hoodie?"

"Can't. Not wearing anything under this."

"I can literally see your PJs under there, Ji."

"Ok, but it's cold. No thanks to you," Fuji sticks her tongue at him teasingly.

The pair continue their sibling banter as they make their way back to Fengjian. The back & forth is interrupted as Raiden grows silent suddenly. Growing increasingly uncomfortable with the silence, Fuji breaks the ice.

"Something on your mind?"

Raiden remains still.

"...Come on, Raiden. If something is troubling you...Listen, I might not have all the answers, but at least let me know what's going on."

-

~Two Days Later~

Raiden closes the mirrored medicine cabinet, the soft click of the small door indicating it was successfully shut. Raiden is faced with his reflection. White, shoulder-length hair, brown eyes (that occasionally turn white, he has noticed), upside-down heart-shaped face, chubby cheeks, oval brows; these features he has seen time and time again. Yet, this look still feels...Foreign to him. How did he get the white hair? Nothing in his memories can track down the point in time when he dyed his hair (Fuji says that he dyed his hair...But...).

He looked...Older. As if he's experienced many things in his life. What those experiences are though-he cannot tell you. Raiden places a hairband in his mouth as he gathers his strands to recreate the man-bun he fondly prefers to wear. It's the one thing that gives him a sense of familiarity. He can remember precisely how he favors pinning up his hair. Raiden looks at himself in the mirror again, staring into his reflections' brown eyes as if he's searching for something behind them. His gaze then focuses on a small picture. A photo was taken when he, Kung Lao, and Fuji went on a school trip in their elementary years. Their class went fishing that day, and he can distinctly remember his kid self getting frustrated because he couldn't catch a single fish that day. Despite living in a village that was on the water, fishing wasn't a skill Raiden acquired. He remembers Kung Lao always being able to catch a large or small one, bragging about how he was going to take his catches back home to eat.

Perhaps it was Kung Lao's bragging that made his younger self jealous and throw a fit. But in that same instance, Kung Lao actually taught him the tricks he used to capture fish. It was Kung Lao that turned that sour trip into a journey he will always remember.

...

Why can't he remember anything? Past that day, when the pair competed to see who could harvest the most cabbages and pay for the loser's meal at Madam Bo's, everything else is a blur. And maybe this wouldn't bother him much; people can have fuzzy memories, especially if they were beaten so severely they had to be bandaged with extreme care by a stranger. But it's not just a few memories that he can't recollect; it's practically all of them past that day at Madam Bo's. Even more alarming...

...He had forgotten that his best friend, Kung Lao, had died. Now, unless he's getting a grave case of early dementia, who would miss that their own best friend died, their own funeral procession? When his sister and parents came forward about this with him, it was only then that Raiden realized that some years passed as well. That meant that he was missing years-YEARS-of life experiences that were now gone from his mind. Even more confusing, he wasn't in a coma. At least, he doesn't think he was.

Ok, lemme explain. Based on what Fuji and his parents told him, some man named Liu Kang offered him a position of high-paying work. It required him to work in the United States, and both he and Kung Lao were offered the job; both men said yes to this opportunity. Looking back at it, in his family's words, they should've pushed back further as they were suspicious of this Liu Kang fellow and this job he was offering their son. But seeing the joy on Raiden's face and his determination to leave with Liu Kang convinced them that their son could handle themselves and pave his own future. Occasionally, he would visit home and send money & unique souvenirs before promptly leaving back to the States. Apparently, he was a martial arts teacher in the States, but everything else was unknown to them. It was a shock to everyone when they heard that Kung Lao died. It came out of left field. Based on what Liu Kang and Raiden told them, an accident happened where some equipment malfunctioned and blew up in Kung Lao's face, a lacerated throat being the primary cause of death. After that, Raiden was radio silent to his family. It wasn't until Liu Kang came to their house in the dead of night years later with Raiden in tow, bandaged and bruised, and left without another word. They haven't seen Liu Kang since.

Aside from the mild inconsistencies (if he was in the States while his family was in China, of course, there would be some muddled details), their story was pretty straightforward based on their point of view...Yet, deep down, Raiden couldn't help but...Feel like there's more to this story. Not that he's distrustful of his family; he truly believes what they said. However, somewhere deep within his conscience, it felt like the story they told him was the tale he WANTED them to believe. As if Raiden knew the truth that explains the holes and contradictions that riddled their recollection of previous events. Yet, the answers to these truths are hidden even from Raiden. Always at the tip of his tongue but forbidden from ever speaking them.

Raiden enters the kitchen; his mother and sister preparing breakfast and lunch for Raiden. Seeing him enter, Fuji smiles from ear to ear. "You slept in, lazy butt."

"Oh?" Raiden looks at the mounted clock, and yep! He's an hour and thirty minutes late to work. "Aw, crap!"

"Calm yourself, boy. I already called the Farm. They were understanding and said to come in when you're ready." His mother says as she sets down a bowl full of steamed Bao Buns. Enough to last until lunch, really.

Looking at the bowl, Raiden knew why they cooked so much. Kung Lao, the gluttonous butt he was, would always visit Raiden so that they could travel to work together. And without fail, he was always raiding their kitchen for any leftovers no one else wanted. It became nearly tradition to cook a bit extra in case Kung Lao decided to pay them a visit.

...Apparently, old habits die hard...Raiden smiles and kisses his mother gingerly on the cheek. "Thank you, mother. I don't want to keep them longer, though. I'll see you guys when I get back." Raiden quickly packs his own lunch, thanks to the assistance of his sister, Fuji, who was already 3 steps ahead of him and grabs a couple Bao Buns before heading out the house.

Walking to the Farm, Raiden couldn't help but feel a sorrowful, almost lonely, acceptance of the village around him. Every building, path, small body of water, old face, new face, everything about Fengjian felt like a ghost to him. It was familiar, yet so dissimilar to Raiden. This village has grown in the past years he was in and out of this settlement. But what disheartens him is the absence of his friend. Raiden only wishes that Kung Lao was here, perhaps he would've helped him make sense of all of this. This...Amnesia mess that he's in. And Raiden would've confided with Madam Bo...You know, if she were still alive. Her death had more consistency; she simply died of old age. It was still a shock; she was his adopted grandmother in Raiden's eyes. So in Raiden's mind, he not only lost a close friend but also a family member and valuable mentor.

Raiden found himself staring at points of interest that held significance to him, especially if it related to Kung Lao. There was a cherry blossom tree up a hill nearby that he and Lao would frequent without fail. Be it to do school work, to see who can climb that tree the fastest and highest, or to chill. It was there that Kung Lao, at the age of 15, expressed his desire to explore their horizons past Fengjian. Raiden still grins to himself, thinking back on the many adventurers Kung Lao wanted to have (although few of them were a bit exaggerated). How they both promised-once they were older-they would travel outside of Fengjian, and experience the world together. Somewhere, deep down, Raiden feels like this has come true if they have gone to the States before...But it feels like more was there than simply hopping over to another country.

There's a convenience store nearby where Kung Lao's house was. It was a favorite, and every time the pair visited it, Kung Lao would rant and rave about all the many meals one could make from just a few store-bought convenience items. Being a child of a middle-class family, Raiden was always baffled by the "dishes" Kung Lao would make, most of them hit or miss due to the cheap ingredients. But Kung Lao loved to cook. He probably would've wanted to become one with the kind of passion he had. But Kung Lao cooked to survive due to...Well, let's just say, he was a poor kid.

Then there was the Farm. They were always getting into some kind of trouble there. Playing daring jokes on each other, helping one another with the back-breaking labor, then the fulfilling trip to Madam Bo's Teahouse. All fond memories.

Before Raiden knew it, the day was already reaching its finale. Raiden worked overtime, something he was often known to do. And, you know, working such late hours without Kung Lao there was...Disheartening. Kung Lao wouldn't assist in the work. In his mind, his shift ended at 5:30 P.M. But he would at least stay with Raiden. To provide him company during the late hours. This time around, the nightlife critters and beasts were his only company. The walk home was seemingly worse. The darkened village felt quiet, with only a few shops open that had loud commotion going on. Friends hanging out and enjoying a good drink together as they drank and ate the rest of the evening away.

The only moment of solace Raiden gained was when he walked back into his house. His mother, father, and sister were loud in conversation as they went over the recent village gossip, village news & politics, and pastime activities they engaged in. It was a breath of fresh air having this personal community that broke the solemn silence that his best friend filled. The night ended with Raiden sitting down with his family and enjoying the dinner they made. It closed with him and his sister, Fuji, cleaning up after their parents as they turned in early for the night.

"Hey."

"Hmm?" Raiden gives Fuji a side glance as he continues to clean up dishes.

"You feeling ok?" Fuji eyes him curiously.

Two days ago, Raiden finally came forward with Fuji about the emptiness he's been feeling. Even though he's in a village that he was born & raised in, filled with familiar faces and family, the fact of the matter is that he dearly missed Kung Lao. But...But it was more than just grieving for a best friend, not that it would make a difference. But Kung Lao filled deeper shoes than just simply being a friend. When he's in bed, he feels like the mattress is too big all of a sudden. He can't eat certain dishes because it will all remind him of Lao. He finds himself crying to himself because he forgot for a moment that Kung Lao would not answer his door or his phone if Raiden were to call. All these things, even as a best friend, would be reasonable to miss and grieve over. But there was something more to their friendship than that.

"Do you think you loved him?" Raiden remembers Fuji asking him when he came forward with this.

"...I don't know...And if I did...Now I have to reconcile with the fact that I'll never get to tell him..."

Raiden smiles at his sister and playfully bumps shoulders with her. "Now that I'm home? I'm feeling good, for now. The rice and pork was really good, Fuji."

"I know right! I used this new spice that my friends were crazy about. It's a Korean spice-"

Fuji rambled on about how she made the dish they had for dinner, and Raiden eagerly listened and conversed with her. Even though Kung Lao was gone, he could try to fill that space with more people who loved him.

-

Outside the residence where Raiden lived, a shadowed figure rests on the rooftops of the sleeping Fengjian village, watching the building like a predator that has found its prey. Blazing red eyes stare through the open windows, watching closely the two figures who pass it daily, unaware they have an interested third party observing them. The being in question, however, was laser-focused on Raiden, watching his every move, taking them to memory. The show would be over, unfortunately, as they closed the curtains and cut off the lights, slumbering like the rest of the village.

The shadowed individual smiles, "Worry not, Raiden. We'll be reunited soon enough. You'll see. Then not even death will tear us apart."

And in a flash of mystical air and dead cherry blossom petals, the figure is gone.

-

~Somewhere in California~

Kenshi groans awake as he feels inklings of the sun peering out from the half-closed curtains. Half-naked, Kenshi, through his sight provided by Sento, is greeted with the ceiling of the luxury apartment belonging to Jonathan Carlton, Johnny Cage. Kenshi felt an added weight on the bed he slept on, knowing who was sharing the mattress with him. Despite this, Kenshi twisted his head to drink in the blissfully still-sleeping man beside him, Johnny.

You know, if you asked Kenshi that he would end up in the loving arms of a pompous Hollywood star, he would've had you killed for even thinking about it. Even when their relationship evolved from enemies to friends, Kenshi would've thought that was the final step in their relationship. Just being friends. But it all fell into place when...When Kung Lao died. Funny how shared trauma can bring others together...

You see, Before Kung Lao died, Johnny was good friends with Kung Lao. They both had their similarities. They were both friends with whom some would consider "the straight man" of their other half, they were both hella self-confident and prideful of their capabilities. The only thing that seemingly differentiated them was that one was poor while the other was rich. Oh, and the fact that Kung Lao was more disciplined when it came to his fighting prowess, compared to Johnny, who was more of a "free-form jazz" type of guy. Although Kung Lao expressed mild annoyance at the actor's Hollywood pride (even Kung Lao wasn't that egotistical), the pair worked off each other pretty well to be good friends.

So when Kung Lao died, aside from Raiden, Johnny took his death the hardest. Being perhaps the more foolhardy of the group (even with his years of maturity the more he was asked to help Liu Kang with other realm matters), that moment was when Johnny really "grew up." It's not like he was new to death, the kind of work they did, they have met many instances where they watched people die in front of them or saw corpses in horrendous states. But it was one thing when it was someone who you weren't close to or didn't know in general. It's another thing when it's someone you do know and have history with.

After Kung Lao's death, Johnny's way of coping was trying to fill in the shoes that Kung Lao left behind. Kung Lao always had a way of lightening the mood that was unique compared to what Johnny would do. Where the actor would constantly spill movie references that no one but Johnny understood, Kung Lao knew how to inspire from the heart. And that took skill and experience to pull off, something Johnny wasn't too well versed in. Looking back on it, Kenshi sees them in a more positive light than before. However, he can't say the same for Raiden. When they were still considered the protectors of Earthrealm, Raiden was spiraling into his own self-hatred and grief. With good intentions, Johnny tried to be a friend to Raiden, wanting to reassure Raiden that they had his back...It didn't end well.

Johnny's desire to keep their friend group together, even though they were drifting apart was harming Johnny more than he thought it was. So when Liu Kang suddenly announced that he would no longer be needing their services, Johnny was quick to take his offer. Now, to the untrained ear, one would think:

"Of course, Johnny Cage dipped out after the going got going! He's an actor who never saw any of the cruelties of the real world because of his wealth!"

Which, in some way, could be the reason. But Kenshi saw something else to Johnny's reason for dipping out. As stated before, Johnny put a lot of emotional energy trying to keep their friend group alive. He tried to fill the shoes that Kung Lao left behind, and in the process, he was draining himself as he tried to keep everyone happy while everyone was coping with Lao's death. No longer being obligated to be Earthrealms protector, meant that Johnny no longer had to hold onto the tearing strings since they were all going their separate ways.

Their relationship still wouldn't blossom until nearly a year and a half ago. Granted, looking back at their previous interactions, perhaps it was fate that they would find solace with each other. Kenshi, with the line of work he involved himself in, had to go into hiding but had nowhere to turn to. Hunkering down with Johnny would've been a foolish thought; he was the exact opposite of discreet. But, because he had to cut back on some expenses, Johnny was living in an apartment building that was a perfect "hiding in plain sight" spot. With Kenshi as his new roommate, Johnny got a bit personal with Kenshi as he was helped dress his wounds. The rest was history as Kenshi found himself kissing Johnny in the heat of the moment. A year and a half later, Kenshi is still in disbelief that they're together still.

While Kenshi would love to admire the sleeping person beside him, he knew that he couldn't stay long. He was still in hiding, and he promised Jax that he would meet him at a disclosed location to discuss next steps. He's careful to slip out of bed without disturbing Johnny, swiftly getting cleaned up and dressed before walking into the kitchen to prepare himself a cup of joe.

"Mmhm. Morning sunshine."

Kenshi nearly jumps out of his skin as he feels strong arms wrap around his waist. He smiles as he cranes his head back to look at Johnny. "Did I wake you?"

"Didn't feel your body keeping me warm, honey. You leaving already?" Johnny says in a husky tone as he nuzzles behind the blind swordsman.

"Have to. I have an associate who's waiting for me. I might not be able to stay here for much longer."

"Again?" Johnny complains in an overexaggerated tone. "How long will you be gone?"

"Don't know, depends on the situation."

This isn't the first time Kenshi and Johnny been separated for long periods of time, something they were both well accustomed to. Johnny was an actor/director, which means he was constantly traveling to other states and countries for filming. Working for the OIA (Outworld Investigation Agency) and the FBI, Kenshi was either traveling the world or traveling realms. Perhaps being the only Earthrealmer who didn't hang up the mantle of being Liu Kang's warrior.

Johnny continues to whine about being alone without Kenshi (even though he'll be alright), playing up his desperation for Kenshi to "stay home" with him. And Kenshi will admit, he can definitely see why he was, and still is, a popular star in Hollywood.

"Can you at least leave me a goodbye gift?" Johnny's fingers start to linger towards Kenshi's waistbelt.

"Johnny," Kenshi chuckles as he moves one of his hands away from his waist, kissing the fingers individually. "I can't right now; I'm going to be late."

"Aw, come on! Just a quicky?"

"No, Johnny."

Cage huffs, but there is no anger hinted there. He just kisses Kenshi's neck and sighs. "Fine. Just come back sooner than later, ok? Bed feels empty without ya."

"I bet it does," Kenshi jests.

"I know it does." As Johnny giggles, his eyes glance at the reflection displayed on the microwave mirror, and he sees…Something moving. A tall, humanoid figure attempting to stealth because it assumes it hasn't been seen.

Just as quickly as Johnny notices this, he quickly grabs a kitchen knife from the knife holder and swiftly throws it at the intruder. Even with his fast reflexes, they weren't as fast as the unwanted guest. The Intruder grabs the knife, blade in hand, while their glowing red eyes stay trained on the couple.

Kenshi, already alerted that something is wrong, calls for Sento to his hand. The magic sword unsheathes itself and flies over to their location. Before reaching Kenshi's hand, with his mystical sight and ability to utilize Sento, even if the weapon is not in his hand, he sharply gestures his one hand in multiple directions in slicing motions. Sento redirects its trajectory as it starts to aim for the home invader. Although the sword was able to get a few good slices in, the individual was fast…Too fast…

"What the hell are you doing in my apartment!?!" Johnny growls as he grabs another weapon of his own (it's another knife).

The figure doesn't respond, only growling as it attempts to rush at Johnny and Kenshi. The pair dodge out of the way, both separated on opposite sides of the person.

"Listen, I'm willing to not press charges AND give you the comfiest dirt nap you'll ever experience IF you tell us what you're doing in my place and why you're attacking us!"

"Something tells me they're not here to talk, Johnny," Kenshi replies as he commands Sento to his hand.

"Ok, dirt nap it is then."

The pair rush the intruder, hoping to overwhelm them with their combined might. Johnny's theatrical and dirty fighting tactics with Kenshi's samurai-like skills and roughhousing tricks. Yet, even with their combined might, this individual was swift and able to counter almost all their attacks while also producing devastating blows of their own.

Very quickly, Kenshi caught on that this person possessed some superhuman strength. Every punch sent Kenshi and Johnny flying in some instances during the fight. This intruder also had some cracks in their skin that had a glow to them. Unfortunately, while Sento gave him sight, it didn't provide Kenshi clarity on specific details like colors. Johnny, however, could see that this person had ashen gray skin, much like how a corpse would look, and the supposed "cracks" were actually the outlines of their inner veins, glowing to an unnatural degree.

Another thing too, this guy just would not quit. Their back and forth was eventually tiring Johnny & Kenshi as they missed one too many close calls that would've killed them. But this home invader had stamina for days. Johnny and Kenshi had to resort to going on the defensive as they had to dodge his attacks while waiting for openings.

Johnny is nearly choked out by this creature before grabbing the heated french press on the stove and slamming it against the intruder's head. Granting the actor time to build some distance.

"Kenshi, I'm gonna need you to think of something, and think of it quick because I'm going to be paying for all these expenses that this prick is breaking!" Johnny windily fusses as he lands a one-two punch on the intruder.

"Get him closer to the living room!" Kenshi says as he provides a helpful block for Johnny, using Sento to slash at the intruder before they can land a hit on Johnny.

"What?" Johnny looks at Kenshi confused before taking a punch to the face.

"Just follow my lead!"

Where Johnny's luxurious apartment was located it was built into a tall skyscraper building, and Johnny paid to get a good view of the city he was living in. That meant that his room was exceptionally high up in the building; leading to an estimated 250 ft drop. And Kenshi was getting some sneaking suspicions that this creature could survive all 250 of it.

Kenshi dares to get closer to the intruder, putting all his might into pushing and fighting this man closer to the living room which had an entire glass wall that showcased that good Californian view. Helping him, Johnny also jumped into the fray, along with Sento as they brought him closer to the glass windows. The intruder was able to block their attacks, but he was inching toward the glass, and they finally grabbed at Kenshi's throat in a crushing grip.

"You will join us, Takahashi. Our family will gladly welcome you." The intruder says.

"I'm all for visiting in-laws and relatives, but we're gonna have to decline the invitation to the family barbeque!" Johnny says. And in that same second, he drops it low and hits your man with the most devastating nutcracker they'll ever experience.

The intruder makes an audible moan as they double over, covering their private bits. Seems this was just enough to not only get them winded but grant Kenshi enough time to perform a flying roundhouse kick and send the intruder falling 230 feet back to the lobby.

"Yo, Kenshi! What the hell, man! I didn't think you were going to kill him!?!" Johnny exclaims. "Dude, I live on this floor!?! And it's 10 in the fucking morning! People are going to see, and then the police are going to be called, then what the fuck am I going to do then? I mean, sure, we were fighting in self-defense, I think that guy had the intent to kill us, but I'm a famous star, dickhead! What am I going to tell the press? Fuck, fucking A, I can already see it, 'Johnny Cage: Famous Actor, Director, and Killer?' Fucking fuck, Kenshi!"

Despite Johnny's angry rambles, Kenshi paid him no mind as he carefully leaned out the side of the broken window, trying to get a good view of the intruder and seeing if his prediction was correct.

…The motherfucker got up.

"Johnny, get dressed, we gotta go," Kenshi says in a hurry as he picks up Sento and the sheath it belongs to.

"Wait, what? Were you even hearing me-"

"We don't have time, get dressed!"

"Ok, ok, I am!" Johnny windily says as he rushes to his bedroom. "Fucking hell, what a goddamn mess."

As the pair are leaving the apartment, Johnny is just getting his best shoes tied, hopping on one leg as he tries to follow the hurried Kenshi. "Wait, Kenshi, what the hell is going on. You're doing that 'I know way more than I let on' schtick that you often do. Did you know that guy?"

"I'll explain once we're far from here. Right now, you're about to meet a good friend of mine."

-

~Wow, this was even longer lmao! I made a second installment! Very excited to keep working on this because we're about to get to the part where Kung Lao returns >:). Had a lot of fun writing Amnesia!Raiden trying to cope with Kung Lao's sudden departure in his life and writing his sister Fuji. BTW, you can check out this post I made of my picrew interpretation of what Raiden's Sister looks like (Fuji - Raiden's Sister). Not too happy with the Johnny & Kenshi scene, but I've been, once again, working all evening and well into the night with this one, so I'm gonna make my peace with it. Hope you guys enjoy it. Can't wait to start writing up the next installment! Pray that I make this one shorter ;A;~

[jupiterdive]

spoilers for the balance | worlds apart below!!

i have never like. felt a lot towards blake as a character before this video. like tbh the most i thought of him was that yeah, he was a threat, but also he plays fortnite canonically and that is really funny to me, but this video????????????????? holy shit this guy has been through so much. i am never one to support characters that have an, "ends justify the means," kind of mindset, and, to make it clear, that is not what i'm doing here, but that guy. damn. there is such sorrow and irony in a seer who's been blinded by his own naïveté and wants and inner turmoil, and it's come at an undefinably large cost to himself and so many others, and that just devastates me. i think that, specifically in this video, erik did an incredible job with both scripting blake's scenes and his vocal performance. i keep coming back to his confession scene and feeling so heartbroken and heavy for the guy. to be clear!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! he has absolutely no excuse for his actions and he is 100% in the wrong for quite literally almost everything we have heard him do in the series, but i feel like the sincerity and honesty of blake's actions and dialogue in this video did a phenomenal job at truly conveying his fear and his grief and his determination for both his and bestie's situation. the fact that he's so desperate to keep them not only alive, but in his life as well, when they've made their boundaries clear to him and he has tried his best to suppress and alter things about himself and do whatever he can to make them as comfortable with him as possible (which is incredibly unhealthy btw he reeks of codependency issues i am not in support of any of this) is tragic to me :(( i'm really looking forward (lie this is a lie i'm actually really scared) to what erik decides to do with him next though!!

[peachdues]

peach oh my LAWD phanta 3 was so good 🥺. Would you consider explaining the title a little more? i read the para at the end with it and i kind of got it, but i wanted to pick your brain a little too!

(I’m so sorry it’s taken me so long to get around to this pls don’t hate me too much).

First, thank you!! Second, I love this question bc honestly, the Phanta brain rot is still real. More below the cut since I went off lol.

spoilers below.

Almost everything in Phantasmagoria is, well, a phantasmagoria — an exhibition of optical effects and illusions; a constantly shifting complex succession of things seen or imagined.

Nearly every part of the story — character interactions, perspectives, plot points — is distorted in some way, whether it be by Wisteria/alcohol, grief, or just individual stubbornness.

The Wisteria is probably the most obvious example, as it literally distorts Reader’s perceptions of both herself, her environment, and her interactions with others

I was particular with not describing the Reader physically (even beyond her clothing) past that initial scene in Part I when she goes to the Kizuki for the first time with Mitsuri. When she does describe herself, she speaks of herself as a “raving princess” and “effervescent” — but nothing truly descriptive.

Why does it matter? Contrast that with the comments Sanemi makes about how he “wouldn’t have known it was her” (which later we find out is literally true); he also tells her, point blank, she looks gaunt, and she has no reaction whatsoever — not even an internal reaction. That’s the wisteria distorting her self-image, until she finally looks in the mirror at the end of Part II and fully sees herself for the first time in a while — and realizes what it has done.

But the Wisteria distorts other things too, namely, the appeal of the club/rave life that Reader throws herself into. At first, she calls it a paradise — it’s her escape from both her heartache and from herself in general. The club then distorts her perception of others — namely, Sanemi, like when she describes him as “menacing” under the club lights, and yet the flashback that immediately follows is one of the saddest in the series — and it shows that Sanemi is hurting just as much as she is. But the wisteria distorts everything around her, so she’s only seeing what she wants to see. Yet, when the illusion starts to crack, what happens? She panics — she describes the Kizuki as too loud, too claustrophobic; the Wisteria quite literally leaves a bitter taste in her mouth.

The other major example of a phantasmagoria in the story is its main theme — grief. Anyone who has been up close and personal with grief can probably attest to the way it quite literally changes how you view everything — even if that means it narrows your perception (I.e. distorts it). Both Reader and Sanemi are grieving significant losses, and those losses make them blind to the other’s suffering in return. It’s not so much miscommunication as it is two kids who were forced to bear the weight of the world way too fast.

That grief then continues to distort their reality, but not in the sense that they’re misremembering events. Everything they say happened, actually happened. Y/N was abandoned by Kyojuro and Sanemi; but she distanced herself from them first, and she also abandoned Sanemi when he needed her. Neither of the boys were there for her while her mother was sick and when she died; but they didn’t know until it was too late. Sanemi did return her feelings 100% at the train station; but he was so overwhelmed and reeling from Genya’s death that he reacted poorly. Sanemi did see Y/N that day at the crosswalk; he just didn’t recognize her. Y/N was isolated after her mother died, but Sanemi was desperately trying to find her the whole time.

Thus, everything happened exactly the way both Y/N and Sanemi said it did, but their grief prohibited them from stepping back and seeing the broader picture — so their interpretation, though objectively true, is still distorted. This translates into other things as well, such as Y/N constantly misinterpreting Sanemi’s motives and efforts to make things right between them, because otherwise, it wouldn’t square with the understanding she has of what happened and why. She thinks he’s using her for convenience; he’s actually letting her use him in any way she wants just so he can have a chance to take care of her. She accuses him of being possessive because he feels entitled to her affection, but he actually loves her (deeply), and is terrified of losing her, because she is quite literally wasting away in front of him. She says he doesn’t care about her, yet she won’t let him. He tries to talk to her about everything right after they start hooking up, yet she refuses to engage. She runs away. She’s cold, and she shuts him down harshly even when he tries to offer her bare minimum affection and care (this also is supposed to contrast with what we know as the Reader, which is that she is still very much in love with him). We also find out that Sanemi spent every other weekend taking flowers to her mother’s grave — again, shattering that illusion she’s created in her mind that he doesn’t care about her.

It’s not until they finally hash everything out in the kitchen at Tengen’s that both realize they’ve been focusing on one narrow part of a much larger picture, and that they’ve both let their grief blind themselves to one another. When Y/N finally steps back and looks at the whole instead of the part, the illusion shatters. Love is the final phantasmagoria. Y/N realizes that she’s mistakenly believed she was running away from love (and thus, Sanemi) only to realize that not only has she been running in circles, but Sanemi has been running opposite of her the whole time. They’re two sides of the same coin; they were bound to crash into one another at some point.

This is just like, a bird’s eye overview of the mind map that I drew out in my journal for Phanta, and I’m sure I’m leaving something out. If y’all have any thoughts, I’m always happy to hear them (seriously).

Thank you for the ask, and I apologize that I went off the deep end lmao.

[completeoveranalysis]

Nick have you seen the parallel between Sakura's farewell words to Lava Lamp and Real!Fai's last words to Yuui/our Fai as uncovered in his final memory in Celes? Could you talk about it?

I didn't notice this at all in the moment, but OOF. The PAIN of this parallel.

WHAT A MOMENT TO ECHO.

It draws quite an emotional parallel between (our) Fai and Lava Lamp Guy. Both of them ended up trapped in long, lonely, torturous situations where their fate was tied to someone else - someone they loved dearly, someone who is kind of dead, but because of their unique situation they ended up tying their entire existence around these ultra painful complex scenarios for the other person's eventual survival. Lava Lamp outright told Watanuki in the dream world that no matter how much he has to endure he will do what needs to be done to fix it. And Fai kind of had the situation happen twice - first, when both twins were alive, where they both stuck in the eternal torture pit for eternity because they refused to let each other die, and then later in life where Fai was trapped into servitude to Evil Wolverine's plan in order to try and revive his brother at the end of it all. Both Lava Lamp and Fai have good goals - they are devoted to someone they love, and will endure anything they think they need to in order to save them. But so much so that it twists their lives into constant suffering, to the point that the person they want to save actually cannot bear it anymore and wants to set them free instead.

So in both these final moments we have Sakura and (the original) Fai sacrificing themselves to save the other from endless suffering - Sakura saving Lava Lamp to free him from his plotline death and everything he is chained to, and (og) Fai making the deal with Wolverine that thematically frees Fai from the pit AND frees his future self from his commitment once he knows the truth of the situation.

It's a very beautiful, dark, and tragic act of love in both cases. They are scenarios born of desperation, where there is no safe winning outcome, and the alternative will either bring endless suffering or death for both of them. It shows that both parties are, at the end of the day, willing to sacrifice literally their entire existence to save each other - but also exploring what that means and how much suffering can come of this blind devotion. IS it truly better to live your life in constant torture in the hope that you might one day free someone you love from their predetermined death? Or is this only forcing yourself to suffer needlessly?

From a plotline perspective, both of these characters are technically already dead by the time we get these lines. Sakura kind of died in Infinity. Her fate, by her own choice, has already been tied to this outcome. It would have been impossible for Lava Lamp to stop it. (Og) Fai, too, is dead by the time Our Fai sees this scene in it's true context. He died hundreds of years ago, and even though Fai bent his entire life around trying to switch places with him, in truth that was always impossible. With that in mind, both scenarios are less about "who sacrificed themselves first to save the other" and more about the concept of trying to change a death that has already taken place - and that's an idea at the very core of Tsubasa all the way through.

What is the true nature of grief? To be in pain forever, or to accept that the person you've lost loved you, wanted the best for you, and wouldn't want you to suffer like this anymore?

Do you, like Evil Wolverine, break anything you need to break in order to bring that person back - or do you allow yourself to heal, like they would have wanted?

It's technically an open question, but in both Fai's death and Sakura's death, we have the person in question actually answer the question for us.