#when ppl ask me things
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lunearobservatory Ā· 1 year ago
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um so this about fav ships but i like the four corners cus i feel like they will just snuggle and bake cookies.
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they tried to four way kiss ...
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inkskinned Ā· 2 months ago
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this is just my opinion but i think any good media needs obsession behind it. it needs passion, the kind of passion that's no longer "gentle scented candle" and is now "oh shit the house caught on fire". it needs a creator that's biting the floorboards and gnawing the story off their skin. creators are supposed to be wild animals. they are supposed to want to tell a story with the ferocity of eating a good stone fruit while standing over the sink. the same protective, strange instinct as being 7 and making mud potions in pink teacups: you gotta get weird with it.
good media needs unhinged, googling-at-midnight kind of energy. it needs "what kind of seams are invented on this planet" energy and "im just gonna trust the audience to roll with me about this" energy. it needs one person (at least) screaming into the void with so much drive and energy that it forces the story to be real.
sometimes people are baffled when fanfic has some stunning jaw-dropping tattoo-it-on-you lines. and i'm like - well, i don't go here, but that makes sense to me. of fucking course people who have this amount of passion are going to create something good. they moved from a place of genuine love and enjoyment.
so yeah, duh! saturday cartoons have banger lines. random street art is sometimes the most precious heart-wrenching shit you've ever seen. someone singing on tiktok ends up creating your next favorite song. youtubers are giving us 5 hours of carefully researched content. all of this is the impossible equation to latestage capitalism. like, you can't force something to be good. AI cannot make it good. no amount of focus-group testing or market research. what makes a story worth listening to is that someone cares so much about telling it - through dance, art, music, whatever it takes - that they are just a little unhinged about it.
one time my friend told me he stayed up all night researching how many ways there are to peel an orange. he wrote me a poem that made me cry on public transportation. the love came through it like pith, you know? the words all came apart in my hands. it tasted like breakfast.
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heartorbit Ā· 4 months ago
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find another role, carry on the show
#EDIT IT DIDNT SAVE MY TAGS. hey so this post got a thousand notes huh. interesting. surely nothing will change#i'll leave all the old tags. for my thought process. and its kinda funny#take a bow stupid idiot (throws a tomato at them)#in stars and time#isat#siffrin#siffrin no middle names no last name ą“¦ąµą“¦ą“æ Ė‰ĶˆĢ€ź’³Ė‰ĶˆĢ )āœ§#... or is it. Smiles#i'd like to draw mira for her birthday but um (hasnt open artfight website in a few days) im scared.#also i have NICE ASKS TO ANSWER.... But im scared. give me a minute#Uawaaaaagh i drew this bc i was trying to animate a little bit but it just . Didnt look good. im not good ag 2d animation#tch. ill keep trying cause there ar e way too many songs that and now about isat because i have brain worms. i need amvs.#IM SCARED TO POST THINGS THAT ARE SPOILERY BECAUSE I WANT MY FRIENDS TO PLAY ISAT. BUT.#isat spoilers#in stars and time spoilers#sasasap#sasasa:p#WHAT IS THE PROLOGUES TAG.#tshirt that says 'i <3 killing the image in the mirror and taking its place' on the fromt#and a list of megan thee stallions tour dates on the back. 恊金ēØ¼ćäæŗ悉ćÆć‚¹ć‚æćƒ¼#Im kind of tempted to edit this to be the versiom with the eyes. or maybe twt can have that. or. well#all of my friends are on twt (trombone slide sfx) so maybe thats where i should worry about spoilers.#ill see if i want to slap an eyepatch on them in the morning#Im one of those people who was like idgaf about twohats (lets it simmer for a week) Oh my god. Oh my god. Ohmy god#EDIT. i swapped it out for the Eyes version it should be fine as long as its tagged formspoilers right...#ill post eyepatch vers on twt partly bc spoilers but also ppl over there can be .. annoying ..... ....#i fear i would get 800 You Forgot The Eyepatch replies. PLEASE JUST SEE MY VISION.#[BANGING MY HANDS ON THE GLASS] HIS HAND. LIKE IN THE PROLOGUE. WHEN THEYE. HANDS. HELD[EXPLOSION
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strawberri-draws Ā· 4 months ago
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shuichi posting
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whilomm Ā· 6 months ago
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oh okay heres one:
"sleepaway camp"= you go there for at least a few days, a week, sometimes several weeks, and sleep there, as opposed to a """camp""" where you go for the day and your parents or whoever picks you up afterward (those arent really camps, but like. idk when i went to "space camp" it was a weeklong but not sleepaway). in the U.S. at least, the typical image of a sleepaway camp involves staying in cabins, dunno how common it is/what it looks like in other countries.
for the first few i just mean like. not necessarily a stealth church camp, just like. idk, a camp where theres also an Assumption Of Christianity and just general vibes without being actually church camp. So, there might not be daily services and jesusy dedicatwd activities, but maybe theres still a prayer said over meals and shit. Which i assume might exist...
(oh and @reblogforsamplesize if u wanna)
#buzzy#poll#polls#personally: yes i went several times#and i enjoyed it bc. camp!!! yay!!!#but the Church part of it. complicated feelings on that matter#mine were all weeklong camps#went every year for a few years i hink#it was fun bc again YAY CAMP!!! and the ones i went to were like huge things#they had cool water stuff like The Blob and waterslides and some fun games and shit#you could do paintball#and i wasnt like. NOT christian at the time. but i also Wasnt Really Feeling It#i was mostly into it bc. camp.#...maybe i should have asked my parents if i could just go to one of the normal summer camps instead lmao#like the 6 week ones or st#that coulda been fun ....#so my answer is Its Complicated#i did like. participate in the jesus side of things. but i was also kinda knowingly faking it u kno?#i remember one time during a service i started having a bit of a panic attack (mostly bc of the MASSVE crowd. this was a huge ass camp)#but i still had to like. stay. still do everything. my pastor was being nice about it but still was like :( well you cant leave#i remember that was the day we did some shit outside w torches#like. carrying torches in a big procession like some sorta ritual thing ig. fuck if i know.#and i was like crying while following the procession and trying to stop#(the crying STARTED un the megachurch extremely loud giaant speaker GET PUMPED UP!!! area and continued to the torches)#thars my stringest memory from church camp aside from when i fcking DEMOLISHED the frozen t shirt game#(they gave a few ppl on stage frozen t balled up shirts and it was like 'okay first one to unball it and put it on wins!!!')#(and while the two boys i was up against started trying to tear it open with their hands i just#(in my cute lil butterfly shirt and pretty skirt started SMASHING IT AGAINST THE GROUND FULL BODY AAAUUGGHH and broke that shit)#(i was sooo proud of mysekf and my oastors wife thiught it was Unladylike of me but i fucjing won. the boys copied me after a sec)#(but it was too late i won :) anyway yeah like i said mixed feelings u kno. anyway go blue beetles woooo!!!!!
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choccy-milky Ā· 1 month ago
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I would do anything to see Clora clobber the fuck out of Duncan fr
LMFAOO THIS IS SO FUNNY...ITS JUST SO RANDOM IT MADE ME LAUGH WHEN I GOT IT BAHAHAšŸ˜­šŸ˜­ so here you go anon, just for you šŸ˜ŒšŸ™
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yes he is!! i headcanon that him and clora grow old together and once clora dies of old age, seb's job of protecting her is finally done so he breaks the horcrux and then follows her soon after šŸ„² that means she'd die before him tho/he'd watch her die AND I HATE THINKING ABOUT THAT...SO I DONT....Kat_12739 on ao3 wrote about it in chapters 11 and 12 of every teardrop is a waterfall and in her version/story, sebastian outlives clora AND lewis and celeste, and its only once theyre ALL dead only then does sebastian break the horcrux and let himself die/meets them in the afterlife AND GIRL U BETTER BELIEVE I WAS SOBBING MY EYES OUT WHEN I READ THOSE CHAPTERS LMAOO so yes seb is immortal and will outlive clora BUT WE DONT THINK ABOUT THAT!!!!!! TRALALALALA
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yandere anon idk who you are but i love you, the fact that you sent this ask IMMEDIATELY after i talked about which wip i should work on next is so funny. YANDERE SEB IS NEXT JUST FOR U, DWšŸ«µ
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beescake Ā· 11 months ago
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Sorry for the spam (^o^;) I just really like your blog
no need to apologize ayy!
in this corner we welcome all forms of enjoyment, regardless of whether you're a
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happy to have yall here w me,
headin into homestuck 2024 :^)
#was debating if sollux truly was lurker type but then i rmbr'd him quietly reading all of karkat's memos for a good laugh HAHAHAHAAH#ask#aleemie#homestuck#karkat vantas#sollux captor#solkat#2024#vioart#but o. regarding the etiquette learned frm other socmed#spamming here is safe+good! it does not harm the op by shadowbanning like instagram#and its not šŸ’€ like twitter where ur likes/following are permanently set to public#ur tumblr experience is within ur control it can be as free/empty/curated as u want!!#((tho ofc i do encourage rbing for ppl who've been hoping to start that habit!!#s'cool to slowly work ur way up from the extra special posts that hv lingered longest in ur heart and quietly build ur cache trove :-)#for example back when i was struggling to rt on a new twt acc i just started setting nonsense criteria for myself LOL#like ā€œbreaking this void is scary holy fuck ok i shall start by rting posts w brownish/reddish clrs bcs its inspo vibes for my artā€#and gradually after a while of deliberate sharing i gained more confidence to share a larger variety of posts that make me feel things!!!!#no more training wheels i may be scared but i love loving more!!!!#same goes for engaging w fics too it takes energy to think of how to comment and thats okā€š do ur best to explore what works for u!!!!#take screenshots of ur fave paragraphs & start annotating in gallery/notes app if that helps!!!!#also tumblr's customizable queue means u can stack posts and bolt hgehehe. my preferred form of existing on the net))
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definitelynotshouting Ā· 3 days ago
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You have synesthesia?? How does that work for you? Is this how you manage to use the word ā€œmeatā€ in a way that makes me go ā€œholy shit thatā€™s good and cool i need to read that sentence four more timesā€ instead of ā€œewā€?????
I do!!! Letters, numbers, and words all have colours and sometimes visual textures for me-- and while numbers and letters on their own are generally only a single colour (7 is a bright, grassy green!!! while "K" is a pale peachy pink, for example :] ), when i put them into words they often take on entirely new colours, some of which even bleed into each other like watercolour paints. Ironically, its why i use the UK spelling of "colour" in the first place-- the "u" turns what looks like a dull, desaturated blue into a smeared blue-and-purple that i find really pretty to look at :]] so when i say i like to paint with words, i kinda mean that literally šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚
But yeah, i'd imagine thats why my writing is Like Thatā„¢ to some degree-- a lot of what im doing behind the scenes involves matching the colours and visual textures of a given word with all of the others in order to evoke a particular vibe or image in my writing. There are a lot of layers to how i write, but this is probably the one that takes both the most time AND is the one i happen to talk about the least WKDJWKSJEJ
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chirpsythismorning Ā· 6 months ago
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Iā€™m sorry but nothing will ever beat Finnā€™s drive playlist that he made during s3 filming, with songs like Me and Michael, The Basement, Gay Thoughts and No Woman lmaoooo
#byler#stranger things#in all seriousness#finn has already confirmed he listens to music on the way to set to get in the zone for his character#millie and noah have said when asked that heā€™s the cast-member most likely to be listening to music on set#do I think every song on there is byler-coded? no#do I think he made it specifically for byler fans to witness and read into? no#but i do think there is a middle ground here#since byler is happening... yeah there are gonna be songs that get him in the zone for byler scenes#and yet there are also probably gonna be songs that he likes rn and wants to use to feel inspo for filming in general#aka plenty of songs just there for the way they sound/the vibes that get him more comfortable getting into character#but then again he also could have made the playlist private to avoid people reading into it#heā€™s known for years people have seen his playlists and hasnā€™t made those private either#so I donā€™t think he cares if ppl read into it#(at least for now...)#but fr that drive playlist still haunts me to this day#i remember when he mentioned listening to music to get in the zone for filming#he specifically mentioned that he listened to it when driving to set and ppl went crazy connecting it to his drive playlist lol#so i mean who knows#maybe he makes the names confusing/random but also sometimes with a hint of truth bc he knows people are gonna deny it or read into it#and he's playing with that possiblity#but i wouldn't die on that hill by any means.#but the drive playlist is why idrc if people read into the STurn one bc i mean....#yeah those songs that sound eerily like mike's emotions in regards to will probably are that way for a reason
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muckyschmuck Ā· 5 days ago
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ultimately!
#ELIIIIIIII YOU CANT SAY THAT ELIIIIIIIIIIII#audiof from not even emily latest video go watch literally its so fuckingfunny#dont even ask me how eli fits in hance' 5'2 dad's clothes pls ok#my art#digital art#oc art#anthro art#not even gonna lie i thfought i wasnt gonan finish this but we pulled thru#if quality gets murdered i will cry#swhy are all my favorite drawings baby sugar and eliyah interacting#i like themb#i was gonna add fucking comical cartoon slipping noises when her antler popped off but imovie literalsly. it didnt work it wpuldnt let me#vid too biggy#also noahs ark esque announcement for ppl thta read my evil ramble tags i miiight nuke sanguinary univers bc i love my ocs too much to like#like i dont wanna marry my first idea and i love them too much to box them into a project I PERSONALLY FEEL LIKE I FUMBLED LIKE#OK LITERALLY NO INSULT WHATSOEVER TO ANYONE WHO MIGHT LIKE IT BUT IT WAS my firsy ever comic and i feeeeel like i can do betteeerrr a#meowweooww#like if it was small things i wanted to change i could juts panel edit but its like. major things like when i started chapter 1 i had#LITERALLY NO PLAN JUST MY nerdy vampire obsession. which is still present. giggle h#breaking news boygirl learns that they arent rlly proudof the writing in comic thye started when they were a teenager#ALSO I LITERALLY HAVE LORE THAT IVE. BEEN MAKING THAT CONTRADICTS THINGS (? PROBABLY) SO ok trust me ok just trust m#also yes this is what iā€™ve been working on except that animatsuon i mentioned with eli crying because priorities or someth#not except wtf i mean insyead or some other shit#also i just looked at this wall of text on mobile and like ew shut up little gay
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lunearobservatory Ā· 1 year ago
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Hi! for the character art asks thing: Austin with g4 in fistfight with god?
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the uhhh the scrunk? the skronkle? the baby boy baby!!!
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inkskinned Ā· 1 year ago
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because sometimes there are invisible tests and invisible rules and you're just supposed to ... know the rule. someone you thought of as a friend asks you for book recommendations, so you give her a list of like 30 books, each with a brief blurb and why you like it. later, you find out she screenshotted the list and send it out to a group chat with the note: what an absolute freak can you believe this. you saw the responses: emojis where people are rolling over laughing. too much and obsessive and actually kind of creepy in the comments. you thought you'd been doing the right thing. she'd asked, right? an invisible rule: this is what happens when you get too excited.
you aren't supposed to laugh at your own jokes, so you don't, but then you're too serious. you're not supposed to be too loud, but then people say you're too quiet. you aren't supposed to get passionate about things, but then you're shy, boring. you aren't supposed to talk too much, but then people are mad when you're not good at replying.
you fold yourself into a prettier paper crane. since you never know what is "selfish" and what is "charity," you give yourself over, fully. you'd rather be empty and over-generous - you'd rather eat your own boundaries than have even one person believe that you're mean. since you don't know what the thing is that will make them hate you, you simply scrub yourself clean of any form of roughness. if you are perfect and smiling and funny, they can love you. if you are always there for them and never admit what's happening and never mention your past and never make them uncomfortable - you can make up for it. you can earn it.
don't fuck up. they're all testing you, always. they're tolerating you. whatever secret club happened, over a summer somewhere - during some activity you didn't get to attend - everyone else just... figured it out. like they got some kind of award or examination that allowed them to know how-to-be-normal. how to fit. and for the rest of your life, you've been playing catch-up. you've been trying to prove that - haha! you get it! that the joke they're telling, the people they are, the manual they got- yeah, you've totally read it.
if you can just divide yourself in two - the lovable one, and the one that is you - you can do this. you can walk the line. they can laugh and accept you. if you are always-balanced, never burdensome, a delight to have in class, champagne and glittering and never gawky or florescent or god-forbid cringe: you can get away with it.
you stare at your therapist, whom you can make jokes with, and who laughs at your jokes, because you are so fucking good at people-pleasing. you smile at her, and she asks you how you're doing, and you automatically say i'm good, thanks, how are you? while the answer swims somewhere in your little lizard brain:
how long have you been doing this now? mastering the art of your body and mind like you're piloting a puppet. has it worked? what do you mean that all you feel is... just exhausted. pick yourself up, the tightrope has no net. after all, you're cheating, somehow, but nobody seems to know you actually flunked the test. it's working!
aren't you happy yet?
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pastadoughie Ā· 4 months ago
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Hello šŸ‘‹ šŸ¤—,
I hope you are well šŸŒŗ.
I am writing to you with a heart full of hope and faith, asking for your urgent help. My family is in great danger due to the war, and I am running a fundraising campaign to save them.
Please, could you reblog the post about my campaign on my account? Every share can make a difference in my family's life. šŸ™
Note:My old Tumblr account was deactivatedšŸ’”, and I need your support againā™„ļø.
Thank you from the bottom of my heart for any help you can provide. šŸŒ¹šŸŒŗ
this has been vetted by multiple different people! tumblr has a really nasty habit of deactivating the blogs of people in gaza so please dont be rude to him about having a new account donate here!! i hope the best 4 u n ur family!!!
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jq37 Ā· 6 months ago
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Just to throw my two cents on the Rat Grinder discourse: They weren't worth the Intrepid Heroes' time. We didn't get the full picture of what's going on with the Grinders until the last quarter of the season. Before that they were just this other clique that hate the main characters, so in-character why would the Bad Kids bother giving them so much attention when they've got so much of their own crap going on. Kristens quest to get Cassandra back and her presidential campaign, Gorgugs courseload, Riz's million and one plates that he's been spinning all season, Adaines financial problems, Figs curse and her doubts about what she wants to do with her life. Fabian's the only one who might have had the time, but he had to be Maximum Legend. There genuinely was no time or even an incentive on the IH's side to develop the Rat Grinders characters.
I still think it's fucked up that these teenagers got taken advantage of by adults they trusted, but we didn't learn any of that until we only had two roleplay episodes left. Too little too late to even try anything diplomatic even if they didn't spend all their time after the Last Stand in hiding.
And a thing about Ivy that no one is roasting her about and really should: An elven archer? Really? Wow, never seen that before.
Yeah totally. Like, from a meta level, I see where the players themselves could have been more curious about the Rat Grinders. There are obvious plot threads that could have been teased out there (though, in fairness to the cast, the adult manipulation aspect didn't become clear until way later in the season--the rivalry and foil aspects were more obvious). This final confrontation could look really different if they'd played that all the way out all season.
But in character? The Bad Kids really didn't have a good reason to waste time on the Rat Grinders. They came into this school year already burnt out from their Night Yorb quest and wanting a break. But they don't get that because they immediately are beset by problems they have to deal with--Kristen's god is on death's door from neglect and she's on the brink of expulsion, Riz is running himself ragged trying to boost his resume for college, Fig is having a whole ass existential crisis, Adaine is struggling with money issues she doesn't want to talk about, Gorgug is taking FOUR YEARS of school at the same time, and Fabian is multiclassing and dealing with his empty house/not having parental support (or Cathilda's support) for the first time. They are dealing with SO MUCH high stakes, personal stuff before the plot even kicks in. And, mechanics-wise, this is represented with the downtime system that means that any time they spend on the RG's is time they can't spend on something that matters more to them. IMO, not prioritizing your haters is actually pretty mature. Like, they weren't proactively using their free time to bully them or anything (except for arguably Fig). They were snippy with them when they crossed their paths and that was it. As opposed to the Rat Grinders who literally had to be told by Jace to stop antagonizing the Bad Kids (though they must have been pretty ineffectual at it because the Bad Kids hardly noticed, which I bet stung considering they were so obsessed).
And also, it's not like they didn't try at all with the Rat Grinders. Early Insight checks on Kipperlilly just got, "This is a polished steel orb of a personality" which doesn't sound very worth interacting with in a sympathetic way if at all and then the next big thing they learn is that she had hated Riz since Freshman Year and that she wants Riz and Kristen dead. And that's AFTER we saw her smile and kill her party cleric. In their position I'm not spending further time trying to empathize with this person, I have made my judgement and it's up to the Jawbones of the world to find if there's something in there to be rehabilitated.
And that's not the only case. Adaine straight up saved Ruben from disintegration during the Frosty Folk battle when she easily could have saved the spell slot, but that didn't soften him towards the Bad Kids any. Adaine also was really keen to Scry on the Rat Grinders to find out what was happening at their meetings. But, in scene at least, she was never able to do that so we never got a scene of them, huddled together, clearly unsure about the path they're on but not feeling like they can walk it back or say no to the authority figures in their lives. She didn't get anything humanizing that would cause her to rethink their position on them the way that she did with Aelwyn for instance. So why would they think they're anything but gleeful co-conspirators?
Hell, the one RG Adaine was even slightly curious about was Oisin and now we know that he was feigning interest in her which, man, can you imagine how much worse that would have felt if she'd actually taken the bait and pursued him beyond just thinking he was cute? Of course, it's possible that her interacting with him more along with some good charm rolls could have changed the narrative in some way but we can only go off of what we know to be true in canon and those facts are (1) He tried to get closer to Adaine while actively planning the downfall of her and her friends, (2) he (along with Ivy) was mean to Buddy behind his back while tricking him into a plan that would force him to go against his religious beliefs, and (3) he called his KVX related dragon ancestors to try to kill the Bad Kids and endanger the entire student body population. Three strikes, you're out. If I'm a Bad Kid I'm not super interested in whatever else is going on with him. And again, literally all of Adaine's friends (except Riz) gave her help to do an Insight check on him during their confrontation in the hallway so she was looking for something there worth engaging with, but she didn't get much.
Fig was fully doing CIA, MKUltra, Fantasy Geneva Convention violations on Ruben to try see if she could get information or flip him. I think she did it in an objectively insane way so I'm not entirely shocked that it didn't yield the exact results she was looking for. But she never found the smoking gun (or whatever the opposite of that is) in his head that would absolve him/show the Rat Grinders were being controlled and her messing with his dreams never flared his conscience enough to make him try to break free (as far as we know) which is what I assume she was going for. If I was Ruben looking for a way out but scared of the repercussions, I might go to Adaine who saved me from certain death earlier the same year and has helped saved the world 3 times with her party and their friends in high (and low) places. Maybe that's what Fig thought might happen but it didn't so from Fig's POV? Gave him a chance. Time to start blasting. And again, at that age, if I walked in to the first day of class and the first thing this random boy does is sneer at me and flaunt his musical success, I'm popping up on his Nemesis Alert at that moment. Doubly so after he tries to trick me and my friends into doing drugs so we get expelled. I'm surprised she tried at all with him.
Fabian absolutely tried to interact with Ivy--in large part for self interested reasons of course, but that doesn't change that he did it. And she came across as callous and unkind from the jump. Their final conversation before the latest episode is the one where she talks about wearing Mazey like a sweater and then says that Fabian missed his chance with her before stalking off. That's a pretty open and shut interaction. No way 17 year old me is like, "Hmm, but why is she acting so mean? Perhaps I should examine that more closely to further understand her." Nah, I've decided she sucks.
And Kristen has tried with Buddy literally up until the last moment. She rolled an Insight check on him right before the fight started and she got a 1. She got nothing from him.
Mary Ann is actually the only Rat Grinder who hasn't done anything to make a bad impression on the Bad Kids--the only thing she did was have a really good Bloodrush tryout. So no reason to hate her specifically (and, in fact, she is also the only Rat Grinder that at least half of them are positively obsessed with), but no reason to explore her further. And Kristen still tried giving her a stuffed animal and her response was that she already had that one and that she was going to give it away. What are they supposed to do with that?
Even when they tried, they didn't get information that was worth chasing when they were so busy and had to manage their free time. Gorgug didn't even slot in downtime to talk to his bio parents when they visited. Why would he spend any time on Mary Ann to figure out her deal? Maybe if they were given more explicit opportunities to interact with them in passing. If Mary Ann was shown at Bloodrush Games. If during class time Oisin tried to interact with Adaine. If Kristen ran into Buddy and Bucky talking. If any of their forays into talking to them or looking into them yielded anything actionable or that piqued their interest--they opened the door for Brennan to give them something more than once. But they never got anything that was worth investing more of their limited time into.
(And also, they didn't learn that Porter was involved until WAY into the last quarter of the episodes. Which absolutely could have changed things since, as far as they knew the RG's were working alone to raise this god which isn't crazy for them to think because Kristen literally did that last year and it was of her own free will. If they knew early that the RG's were smaller players in Porter's plot then maybe they would have been in more of a rescue mindset--especially since Fig has always mistrusted him--but that's not information they had and by the time they got it, the RG's were in deep hiding, like you said.)
And so, coming into the last few episodes, that's who the Rat Grinders are to the Bad Kids. A group of kids who they first heard about in the context of, "they famously hate you," even though they'd never interacted before. A group of kids who they already thought sucked even before they tried to kill the entire study body an hour ago. A group of kids who are trying to doom all of Elmville to eternal rage and who are willing and ready to kill them to do it.
With that context, yeah I think their actions are pretty understandable.
(Also, lmao. Yeah, I think calling Ivy basic would probably hurt her more than most things you could say to her.)
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stevebabey Ā· 2 years ago
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ok brain whipped up this concept & would NOT leave it alone today so here. have this. this is like ā€˜started making it. had a breakdown. bon appĆ©titā€™ in a steddie post for me but alas <3 cw: talks of past sexual coercion
Eddie is mad at Steve.
Which, honestly, might be the worst thing in the entire damn world for all Steve cares. The whole world feels just a little bit off kilter when Eddieā€™s mad at Steve ā€” because Eddie just loooves the silent treatment.
Heā€™ll usually make a show of it. Pout and stick out his bottom lip, cross his arms, maybe even give a stamp on his big booted feet. Doesnā€™t say whatā€™s wrong, just glares sulkily. Itā€™s a bit childish, they both know, but Eddie likes to be doted and Steve loves to do the doting ā€” and it hasnā€™t caused any proper fights yet.
This time, however, he can tell Eddie is more mad than usual, because this time he hadnā€™t thrown the usual fuss. Instead, heā€™d just gone quiet. All glowers and glares. Not even a pout, and certainly not a peep. Ā 
And itā€™s just the worst because the version of Eddie that Steve knows best is a chatterbox. Canā€™t shut up, wonā€™t shut up. Steve normally loves it.
And alrightā€” maybe Steve deserved it for not picking him up after one of Eddieā€™s gigs. Especially because Eddie had specifically asked him too as well, considering his own van was in the shop.
But itā€™s not like Steve could control when his parents decided to waltz back into Hawkins!
They always seemed to run on their own timetable, or on what seemed like an entirely different orbit. Yet, they had no trouble roping Steve back into their routine, stuffing him back into a place, without any regard to his opinion on the matter. Which was exactly what they had done that evening.
But that didnā€™t really matter, Steve thinks with a sigh, because he knows itā€™s not really just because he didnā€™t pick Eddie up. It was because of what Steve said.
Garethā€™s mom had swung by and while Eddie had gotten an eyeful of that suspicious look that followed him everywhere since the events of the Upside Down, Eddie had gotten home safely. Majorly annoyed but safe which was what mattered most.
He had then released his said-annoyance onto Steve.
But see, Steve was already tired from the prodding and lecturing of his parents. Theyā€™d been awfully disappointed to find he had yet to move on from his job at Family Video and worse, had badmouthed his choice of friends. Had brought up Tommy and the likes, asked pointedly why Steve hadnā€™t been seen with them in a few months.
Steve had bit his tongue to not spew out the fact he hadnā€™t been seen with Tommy for years and that was unlikely to change any time soon.
So, yeah, he was wound up. And Eddie was too. A bit too impatient, a bit too cut that heā€™d been on the receiving end of yet another scathing interaction because Steve had been so careless to forget to pick him up.
Heā€™d said as much, jabbing a finger and dramatically reenacting the tense conversation heā€™d had to have with Garethā€™s mother.
It had led to a spat, which led to an argument. Steve sat on the bed in Eddieā€™s trailer and toyed with a loose thread as Eddie pacing before him.
ā€œYou shouldā€™ve been there.ā€
ā€œI know.ā€ Steve ground out the words, eyes on the floor, feeling too much like he was still back home, still being lectured by his father about his good-for-nothing son. The thread was coming looser in his fingers with all his fiddling.
ā€œYou know? Is that all youā€™re gonna say?ā€ Eddie asked, exasperated, but the moment Steveā€™s lip part to respond, Eddie had steamrolled on. Garethā€™s awkward smile and his motherā€™s tight bunched up shoulders were still fresh in his memory.
ā€œGreat! Thatā€™s just fantastic, Steve. You knew and you still didnā€™t show up!ā€
Steveā€™s head shot up, brow furrowed. ā€œThatā€™s not what I meant.ā€
Like a kettle coming to boil, Steve could feel some bitchy comment lurch up his throat with his growing frustration. It was easy to think of things to say to hurt Eddie, to lash out, to make it so Eddie was the one with his head bowed, voice quiet.
Steve had learned that the hard part in these moments, is biting his tongue. Swallowing back mean comments. He doesnā€™t want to be vicious. Loathes the idea of falling back on snarky comments to win a fight, least of all with his boyfriend.
But... old habits die hard.
So, when Eddie had got all up in his face, firing himself up, and said, ā€œOh, pray tell then Steve what was so important that made you fucking forget your boyfriend.ā€
Steve had snapped.
ā€œFuck, do you ever stop? You are so much sometimes!ā€
The words had flown out in a harsh sneer and they hit their mark exactly as intended.
Because Steve knew all about that strange bubble of fear that lives inside Eddieā€” the part that didnā€™t care at all what strangers thought of him, but cared so much about those he came to trust. The part that worried that being big and brash all the time would be too much for people. That the reason they originally liked Eddie, would become the same reason theyā€™d eventually dislike him for.
Steve had once told him he couldnā€™t ever get enough of himā€” let alone too much. Itā€™s why heā€™d known where to strike.
Eddieā€™s expression has flinched, his eyes going from simmering to hurt in a few seconds flat. His fists unclenched at his side and Steve had felt the regret curdling up in his gut, a terrible sour feeling that had him shooting to his feet in an instant.
ā€œEddie, wait, Iā€”ā€
ā€œLeave.ā€ Eddie said, voice dangerously low. There wasnā€™t room to push it. Nothing left to argue.
But still, Steve had wavered, swaying as a tidal wave of shame burned hot up his neck. He wanted to fix it. He needed to fix this.
But Eddie couldnā€™t look at him, eyes fixed on the ground and despite how much it had pained Steve to go, he knew he couldnā€™t fix it, not then and there. The door had hit him on the way out.
That had been two whole days ago. The guilt of it makes it feel like it was hours ago, still fresh as ever.
Steve had been diligent in giving Eddie his space to cool off.
The call Steve made the morning after never got picked up, just rang endlessly until the voicemail kicked in. Even though Eddie was always home Wednesdays. It told Steve well enough that Eddie was still well and truly mad.
Which was fair enough. Steve had been an asshole. Let himself fall back on old habits and stab a weak spot he only knew because Eddie trusted him, then twisted the knife as well.
But itā€™s like he said ā€” silent treatment from the guy who usually canā€™t keep quiet is discerning to say the least. It itches uncomfortably at Steve who finds himself unusually eager to apologise.
Because, damn, if Steve doesnā€™t hate apologising.
Apologising means pulling out the stops, means admitting shamefully everything youā€™d done wrong, means having to prove how sorry you were.
It had been like that living under his father. When he was seven, Tommy had accidentally pitched a baseball through one of the windows. It had smashed right through, completely shattered. Steve had taken the fall.
Heā€™d said sorry, head bowed, even though it had been an accident. And after heā€™d made Steve repeat his apology til it was a rigid phrase in his mouth, Richard Harrington had said; ā€˜Well, why donā€™t you prove how sorry you are, Steven?ā€™
Heā€™d ended up being his fatherā€™s personal beer boy for that week. Fetching them ice-cold from the garage at his fatherā€™s every call, from the moment he was home from school, to prove the apology was legitimate.
It had workedā€” after a week of doting, extra effort into keeping his room clean and to keep his father happy, Richard had permitted his son a rare smile and ruffle of his hair. ā€˜See? I know you were sorry now.ā€™
Steve had learnt quickly in his childhood to go to lengths to avoid trouble with his father. To avoid the tumultuous apologies heā€™d have to perform, jumping through hoop after hoop for forgiveness.
But even then, Steve couldnā€™t escape them with friends, and especially not with girlfriends.
Tilly had been like that too. Sheā€™d been Steveā€™s freshman girlfriend, eyeshadow baby blue and lips always glossy. When Steve did things she didnā€™t like ā€”spent Saturdays with his other friends, was late to datesā€” sheā€™d pout her glittery lips and bat her eyes. ā€˜Arenā€™t you gonna make it up to me?ā€™
Steve had ā€” had pulled out the stops, emptied his pocket change to buy her flowers, went to second base because she really wanted him to, all to prove his apology. Until Tilly was back to her sugary smiles and fluttering hazel eyes.
It had even been like that with Nancy, though not quite to that extent. Forking out his savings to buy the nicest bouquet he could find, prepared to make it up to her, even if he wasnā€™t quite sure if it was him who was supposed to be apologising. But sheā€™d gone silent treatment on him, soā€¦
So, Steve hates apologisingā€” but even more than that, is how much he hates Eddieā€™s quiet. So, when his boyfriend calls the Family Video on Friday midday, when he knows Steveā€™s soloing, and invites him over, Steve prepares himself for the grovelling to come.
The mixtape heā€™d already made sits in the gearbox of his car, carried around with him since he finished it. Upon hanging up the phone, Steveā€™s eyes catch on the florist across the street. His mind spins with all his knowledge of Eddieā€™s favourites ā€” should he get those sour candies Eddie loved so much as well?Would it be too much?
Steve scoffs at the irony of his worries, considering what he was apologising for. Besides, it was never too much. There were never enough things to show he was sorry.
And Eddie couldnā€™t exactly be bought ā€” not that was what this was. But Steve knew his boyfriend preferred all things in the manner of touch. That Steveā€™s affection was a far higher currency than anything bought with money.
Thatā€™s fine. Steve can do that.
Heā€™s got a whole speech planned, honest. The smudged bullet points scrawled on his palm are testament to that, there to keep him on track and Steve checks them over religiously as he drives over after his shift.
It all goes out the window when Eddie opens the door, because Steveā€™s heart hiccups, splutters, soars forward in his chest.
Eddie looks just the same, his usual ripped jeans and dark shirt with a band Steve doesnā€™t know and yetā€” yet.
Steve is overcome by how much he missed Eddie.
Overcome at how those two days felt like two weeks to him. His mouth opens and the words burst out, ā€œIā€™m sorry.ā€
part two.
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almondcroissantsandink Ā· 1 year ago
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I'm moving and was going through my books today and found the Book of Mormon script book I bought in like 2016 so I could illustrate Kevin Price's coffee monologue and opened it up to the Spooky Mormon Hell Dream section and this line has no right to be so funny
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