#when nobody else got me electra heart got me ...

[finalgirlgretchen]

crazy how actually every seemingly innocuous decision i have ever made can be traced back to some weird neurosis i have about myself and the way i exist in the world

[weepingseraphstranger]

Character Playlist ♡ Maria Catani

I love making playlists for my characters. Even the ones I don't plan on making public.

(I'll Never Be) Maria Magdalena - Sandra

" I'll never be Maria Magdalena "

Cold Hearted - Paula Abdul 

"You're the one to sacrifice Anything to please him Do you really think he thinks about you when he's out? "

Bubblegum Bitch - MARINA

"Oh, dear diary, I met a boy He made my doll heart light up with joy Oh, dear diary, we fell apart Welcome to the life of Electra Heart "

I See Red - Everybody Loves an Outlaw

"Did you really think, I'd just forgive and forget, no After catching you with her Your blood should run cold, so cold You, you two-timing, cheap-lying, wannabe "

Better Than Me - Doja Cat

"Better than me All of them bitches ain't better than me I know you wanted somethin' else at your feet You gon' figure out you lost one and that's me "

Piece of My Heart - Erma Franklin

"But I'm gonna show you, baby That a woman can be tough "

Ain't Nobody - Chaka Khan

" Happened so naturally Did not know it was love The next thing I felt was you Holdin' me close What was I gonna do? I let myself go "

Catch Me (I'm Falling) - Pretty Poison

" You came into my life The look in your eyes took me by surprise It's you and nobody else Your love has made me so blind I can't see "

Cheri Cheri Lady - Modern Talking

" I get up, I get down All my world turns around Who is right? Who was wrong? I don't know "

Sexy Bitch - David Guetta

" I'm tryna find the words to describe this girl without being disrespectful "

Le temps de l'amour - Francoise Hardy

" On se dit qu'à vingt ans On est les rois du monde Et qu'éternellement Il y aura dans nos yeux Tout le ciel bleu "

Hey Rich Boy - Millionaires

" Hey, hey rich boy, look my way Hey, hey rich boy, make my day Hey, hey boy, you look so fly Throw that money in the sky "

Girls in Bikinis - Poppy (cover)

" Girls in bikinis Girls in bikinis and platform heels, in new hot wheels "

The way I are - Timbaland

" Baby, if you strip, you can get a tip 'Cause I like you just the way you are "

Rules - Doja Cat

" Said play with my pussy, but don't play with my emotions (Emotions) If you spend some money, then maybe I just might fuck ya "

Promiscuous - Nelly Furtado

" I'm a big girl, I can handle myself But if I get lonely, I'ma need your help Pay attention to me, I don't talk for my health I want you on my team So does everybody else "

Rich Girl - Gwen Stefani

" No man could test me, impress me My cash flow would never ever end 'Cause I'd have all the money in the world If I was a wealthy girl "

When I Grow Up - The Pussycat Dolls

" I wanna see the world, drive nice cars, I wanna have groupies "

Hands Up! - Vanessa Doll

" Pearls on my neck and a bottle in my Fendi Ice cream pussy, stripper shoes in a Bentley "

Killer Queen - Queen

" She keeps Moët et Chandon In her pretty cabinet "Let them eat cake," she says Just like Marie Antoinette "

Gloria - Laura Branigan

" Or will you catch him on the rebound? Will you marry for the money? Take a lover in the afternoon? Feel your innocence slippin' away Don't believe it's comin' back soon "

You don't own me - Lesley Gore

" You don't own me I'm not just one of your many toys You don't own me Don't say I can't go with other boys "

Juicy Couture - Ayesha Erotica

" I'm gonna get what I want Claire's Icing, all the best Look much hotter than all the rest Coach bags, Candy stores I get what I want then I go get more "

Maneater - Nelly Furtado

" A maneater, make you work hard Make you spend hard, make you want all of her love She's a maneater, make you buy cars "

Primadonna - MARINA

" Would you do anything for me? Buy a big diamond ring for me? "

I'll Be It - Ayesha Erotica

" I'll be your blonde tonight, if that's what you like Stilettos and fishnets, if that's what you like "

What's Love Got To Do With It - Tina Turner

" What's love, but a sweet old-fashioned notion? What's love got to do, got to do with it? Who needs a heart when a heart can be broken? "

Lip Gloss - Lil Mama

" They rollin' they eyes, they lip gloss cheap It ain't my fault but I can upgrade ya Show you how to use nice things with nice flavors "

Love Game - Lady Gaga

" Hold me and love me Just wanna touch you for a minute Maybe three seconds is enough for my heart To quit it "

Addiction - Doja Cat

" I got such a pretty body Feels prettier when I'm a mess "

Say So - Doja Cat

" Shut it, save it, keep it pushin' Why you beating 'round the bush? Knowin' you want all this woman Never knock it 'til you try "

Vixen - Ayesha Erotica

" Lust and drugs, no intuition (No) Who goes first? Make your decision (No, no, no) If you want to I can play the victim I am your vixen "

Government Hooker - Lady Gaga

" I can be good (if you just wanna be bad) I can be cool (if you just wanna be mad) I can be anything, I'll be your everything "

Toxic - Britney Spears

" I need a hit, baby, give me it You're dangerous, I'm loving it "

Worth It for the Feeling - Rebecca Black

" Here we go again Last time it took us down to the bitter end I might need some more healing But it's worth it for the feeling "

Morning Light - Doja Cat

" Don't wanna waste your time Go 'head and live your life I could be yours tonight We'll be up 'til the morning "

You Know I'm No Good - Amy Winehouse

" You say, "When we married" 'Cause you're not bitter "There'll be none of him no more" "

Off to the Races - Lana Del Rey

" My old man is a bad man, but I can't deny the way he holds my hand And he grabs me, he has me by my heart "

(I'll Never Be) Maria Magdalena - Sandra (again)

" You take my love You want my soul I would be crazy to share your life Why can't you see what I am? Sharpen the senses and turn the knife Hurt me and you'll understand "

Yummy - Ayesha Erotica

" Yeah, big purse with the rhinestone buckle Keep a pink stun gun just in case I’m in trouble Double double, yeah, they asking for the fries on the side But I never take 'em home unless it's eyes on the ride "

When I Rule the World - LIZ ft SOPHIE

" When I rule the world, then you're the little girl You should do as I say 'cause things are gonna be my way I rule the world, so get down on your knees "

Pretty - Coco & Clair Clair

" You know what I mean, it's the sweetest thing Honestly, just look at you then look at me I'm feelin' pretty, no matter the city, we're packin' knives "

Sexy Naughty Bitchy Me - Tata Young

" I like all of my shorts to be a little too shorty Unlike all of my guys I like them tall with money "

She's A Lady - Tom Jones

" Well, she's all you'd ever want She's the kind they'd like to flaunt and take to dinner "

Emotions - Mariah Carey

" You've got me feeling emotions Deeper than I've ever dreamed of "

Candy - Doja Cat

" I can be your sugar when you're fiendin' for that sweet spot Put me in your mouth, baby, and eat it 'til your teeth rot I can be your cherry, apple, pecan, or your key lime "

Better - Jeremy Passion

" Baby, you're so much better Better than what I imagined love would be like Better, hotter than the clearest day Or the storms at night "

Private Dancer - Tina Turner

" I'm your private dancer A dancer for money And any old music will do "

Gibson Girl - Ethel Cain

" He's cold-blooded so it takes more time to bleed Obsession with the money, addicted to the drugs "

Streets - Doja Cat

" Damn papa, you a rare breed, no comparing And it's motherfuckin' scary Tryna keep him 'cause I found him Let a ho know I ain't motherfuckin' sharing "

Gimme More - Britney Spears

" A center of attention (do you feel that?) Even when we're up against the wall You've got me in a crazy position (yeah) If you're on a mission "

Lolita - Lana Del Rey

" Shining like a God, can't believe, I caught you, and so Look at what I bought Not a second thought, oh, Romeo "

Fool For You - Alice Smith

" Sweet sugar, I surrender, I don't want no other man. Baby, you win and you ain't never got to worry Ever got to worry, you'll never be alone again. "

I've Been Lovin' You Too Long - Etta James

" With you my life has been so wonderful I can't, I can't stop now You are tired and your love is growing cold My love is growing stronger as our affair, our affair grows old "

Wayamaya - Lizzy Grant

" I remember an all white day with 8-story waves He said "Your eyes are gray" (Beautiful) We were livin' on Côte d'Alene "

Lies - MARINA

" Don't wanna know, don't wanna know, oh I can't let you go, can't let you go, oh I just want it to be perfect To believe it's all been worth the fight "

Kill Kill - Lizzy Grant

" I'm in love with a dying man I have done everything I can "

DISDAIN - CORPSE

" Tell me how the fuck it feels, girl When shit starts getting fucking real, girl When it all sets in, what’s your deal, girl? Like who gon’ have you now? "

In My Feelings - Lana del Rey

" Makin' love while I'm makin' good money Sobbin' in my cup of coffee, 'cause I fell for another loser "

High By the Beach - Lana del Rey

" The truth is I never bought into your bullshit When you would pay tribute to me 'Cause I know that All I wanted to do was get high by the beach Get high baby, baby, bye bye "

Sex Money Fellings Die - Lykke Li

" Sex, money, feelings, die "

Back to Black - Amy Winehouse

" And I tread a troubled track My odds are stacked I'll go back to black "

I Can't Stand the Rain - Tina Turner

" I can't stand the rain against my window 'Cause he ain't here with me "

[danielxricciardo]

Song lyrics prompt list

1. “It’s the little things about us, that I love so much.”

2. “Last night I told you I loved you // woke up blamed it on the vodka”

3. “It’s a better place since you came along”

4. “You make me love the things I hate “

5. Just a paper sheet and half a cigarette are left in my hand

6. Your faith walks on broken glass

7. "And can you teach me how to dance real slow?"

8. "I'll throw away my faith, babe, just to keep you safe"

9. "One night, you won't forget the rest of your life"

10. "We only said goodbye with words"

11. "I'll try to give you love until the day you drop"

12. "I like the pretty boys with the bow tie"

13. "Lets get drunk forget what we did"

14. Your kisses lift me higher

15. When you're ready we can share the wine

16. "And if you don't love me now you will never love me again"

17. "Why'd you have to go and make things so complicated?"

18. "When there's nothing to lose and there's nothing to prove"

19. She's the kind of girl who only asks you over when its raining, just to make you lie there catching water dripping from the ceiling.

20. Now I understand, you're a human, and you got to lie, you're a man

21. The good and the bad times: we've been through them all.

22. Now I ain't educated but I sure ain't stupid

23. I grew up in the shoes they told me I could fill

24. It's hard to say that I'd rather stay awake when I'm asleep

25. A lover would just complicate my plans

26. And in the morning, i’ll be with you, but it will be a different kind

27. My heart is yours, it’s you that i hold on to

28. And with one kiss, you inspired a fire of devotion that lasts for twenty years

29. I let go of my claim on you, it’s a free world

30. I’m in my bed, and you’re not here and there’s no one to blame, but the drink in my wandering hands

31. Cause you gave me peace and i wasted it, I’m here to admit that you were my medicine

32. Oh, dear diary, i met a boy, he made my doll heart light up with joy. Oh, dear diary, we fell apart, welcome to the life of electra heart

33. For you, I would cross the line, I would waste my time, I would lose my mind

34. Is it really me you're missing?

35. Remember that night?

36. How many times can I break till I shatter?

37. As long as I breathe, I’ll call you my home

38. "You wouldn't know love if it crushed your fucking chest."

39. "When we scream our lips don't make a sound."

40. "Please don't let me sink, wrap your arms around me and carry me home."

41. "This hasn't torn us apart so nothing ever will."

42. "A long time ago we believed that we were united."

43. "I miss the person that you were but I don't miss you."

44. "If home is where the heart is, why do I feel so fucking heartless?"

45. "I can't live, I can't breathe with or without you just go away."

46. "I'm not afraid to die, I'm afraid I'll survive and have to watch you suffer."

47. "I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away."

48. "I'm not like you I just fuck up."

49. "All because of you I believe in angels, not the kind with wings, no not the kind with halos. The kind that bring you home when home becomes a strange place."

50. "I just want to go to sleep and never wake up again."

51. “I wish people liked me more.”

52. “How could I ever love someone else?”

53. “I guess you’re getting everything you want.”

54. “She probably gives you butterflies.”

55. “I hope that you’re okay.”

56. “I defended you to all my friends.”

57. “I never cared about what they say, only care about me and you”

58. “Either way i’m gonna lose, so i’m just gonna keep on loving you”

59. “You know i’m bad at communication, it’s the hardest thing for me to do”

60. “Iwas your lover, i was your friend, now I’m only just someone you call when it’s late enough to forget”

61. “It’s fucked up but it’s true that i love you like i do”

62. “Well we both had nights waking up in strangers beds but i don’t wanna, don't wanna, i don’t wanna give up yet”

63. “Tell me I’ve got it wrong somehow.”

64. “I’m begging for you to take my hand.”

65. “I can’t make it go away by making you the villain.”

66. “He feels like home.”

67. “I’d be breaking all my rules to see you.”

68. “But I know you’re not scared of anything at all.”

69. “When can I come back?”

70. “I’m ready to owe you anything”

71. “I’ll always look best in your head”

72. “I know you know it’s wrong, but I’m ready”

73. “All I ever want is breaking me apart.”

74. “Let's talk sweetly like all our love is false.”

75. “You put a fire in my heart, painted blood on my stars, gave me faith.”

76. “I wanna meet your girlfriend, she sounds nice.”

77. “How is kissing me so wrong?“

78. “Can’t you see that I’m already yours?”

79. “I’ve been losing track of the romantic sh*t I’m tryna say but basically I love you"

80. “I don’t wanna be your friend, I wanna kiss your lips, I wanna kiss you until I lose my breath”

81. “I apologize for all your tears, I wish I could be different but I’m still growing up into the one you can call your love”

82. “I’m out of my head, of my heart, of my mind cause you can run but you can’t hide, I’m gonna make you mine”

83. "I never loved someone the way that I love you"

84. "It's the way that you know what I thought I knew, it's the beat that my heart skips when I'm with you"

85. "I hope she gettin' better sex, hope she ain't fakin' it like I did, babe"

86. “I know we’re young and people change and we may never feel the same”

87. “I can’t change the world, but maybe I’ll change your mind”

88. "You don't own me. Don't tie me down 'cause I'd never stay."

89. "Leave everything that is worth a single cent and just take me instead."

90. "And then I got you off your knees, put you right back on your feet, just so you can take advantage of me."

91. "Hey, I can't let you go with nobody. Cause I love you, baby."

92. "Tell me that it wasn't my fault and that I was enough for you."

93. "We were good at faking forever, I get it, whatever."

94. "Cause you had your chance and you blew it. Yeah, you ripped it up and you chewed it."

95. "Well, I'm too busy for your business. Go find a girl who wants to listen."

96. "Stop looking at me with those eyes, like I could disappear and you wouldn't care why."

97. "Oh, we could do whatever you want, but boy, don't go falling in love, you can't stay with me, all you'll ever have is one day with me"

98. "I pray the medication slow me down, but that shit doesn't work when you're around"

99. "Told her that I loved her once and now she'd kill for me"

100. "What the tell were we? Tell me we weren't just friends"

[frankpanioncube]

Karaoke Night - I did this whole thing on one of my Discord Servers

So basically - it was the 7 main guys and what they’d do on Karaoke night.

I said I’d put it on my Tumblr...but it was going to be when I could do some linking to stuff: So I have put music vids, links to songs wherever they are and if nothing else - enjoy this

Lucifer: Can sing like a...well (fallen) angel. Is a lyrical baritone but can get up to some Tenor stuff.

Karaoke night is a hard thing to get him involved in because (and he recognizes it) he will be asked to do STUPID stuff.

They make him do Weird Al covers, Eminem...the lewdest crap they can imagine because...well..also - he can pull off a lot of stuff it's like 70 percent to irritate him and 30 because ....well...they all want to have him sing "Friend of the Devil" by Adam Jensen.

MC/Lucifer - they're doing Andrea Bocelli and Sarah Brightman. "Time to Say Goodbye" and  mC can't keep up with him...it's his show.

Lucifer/Mammon Duet: Mammon willl make Lucifer sing X Gonna Give it To ya (specifically the Deadpool version) and Mammon does most of the work here but but he is so invested int getting Lucifer to rap it's actually quite amazing.

Lucifer/Leviathan Duet: Carameldansen - Levi will pull off all the dance moves in the background and will back up Lucifer. Who will be stock still otherwise.

Lucifer/Satan Duet: It's Shia LaBouef. Satan is no singer but pulls off those spoken word  bits - and Lucifer is ...okay until he realizes what he's singing about. It's an odd vibe - it's awesome and also very strange to watch.

Lucifer/Asmo Duet: It's "Mad World" but the live version from the Adam Lambert concert. Asmo is the vocalist and Lucifer does back up and by GOD it works.

Lucifer/Beel Duet: I'd Do Anything for Love - and it doesn't go how you'd expect - Vocally it's Beel's show - Lucifer turns off the kareoke player and plays the piano. It makes everyone watching very hot. it's a dangerous combo.

Lucifer/Belphie: I Hate Everything About You by Three Days Grace. And BY GOD. It lands.

Karaoke Mammon:

Is the guy who figured out you can make dying whale noises in rockband to pass levels. And does it unappologetically. As a singer - not bad when he's trying. He could pull off something if he practiced. He has a good range but it's not refined. He can hit some contralto notes occasionally and some baritone stuff but very much lacks the practice.

Mammon on his own: Picks villain songs from musicals. He can do "Gaston" or "All you Wanna Do" from Six (much to Asmo's disgust).

Mammon and MC Duet: It's Tough to be a God from The Road to ElDorado. He'd love to do that and he makes a great Tulio to MC's Miguel.

Mammon and Lucifer: They do a duet of "Not a Common Man" - Mammon does a lot of musical stuff and he HATES Lucifer takes this one over. Cause the lyrics are him. Lucifer likes that he does the legwork on this.

Mammon and Leviathan: Butterfly by Crazy Town - to be fair - Levi thought it was Butterfly from the DDR game. However - between Mammon's voice and Levi's aptitudte for rhythm they manage this shockingly well.

Mammon and Satan: This duo isn't nearly as vicious to Lucifer as Belphie and Satan but - oh it's gonna get messy. Rage Unrestrained  by Excessum and they're all going to the ER. Including Mammon. It's worth it.

Mammon and Asmo: THey do a duet of David Bowie's Ziggy Stardust. It gets chaotic. Both can't wait to be the centre of attention.

Mammon and Beel: Sex Bomb - Because even if it makes everyone feel sorta...weirdly sexual (and probably because he wants to stick it to Asmo) - Getting Beel to do some Tom Jones is a great idea.

Mammon and Belphie: The Real Slim Shady - Eminem - and they they can do it. And Belphie can pull that nasal stuff.

Karaoke Leviathan:

On his own: Does lots of anime and idol stuff of course. He's mediocre as a singer but pulls off all the dance moves well.

Levi on his own: Does exclusively stuff from his fave idol groups - not that he nails the vocals but he's not intolerable. He does nail the chorography.

Leviathan and MC - gets as many people invovled as he can and they do TRI-ANGLE feat BOA and the TRAX - They know if they flatter Mammon enough he'll do the break down.

Leviathan and Lucifer - Real Emotion - The idol song from FFX-2 - but Lucifer doesn't find the song that offensive and Levi can do the background dance stuff.

Leviathan and Mammon: X Japan's Rusty Nail. And if you haven't seen the music video to that - it's the epitome of 80ies/mid 90ies anime music vids. (plus I am in love with Hide and cried my eyes out over his suicide.) - they'd manage this one. Not without Mammon remembering the music video and SOBBING.

Leviathan and Asmo: Hey, they do this one song: Sinful Indulgence. It's from a popular Otome game. It's Asmo's show but Levi can keep up.

Leviathan and Satan: THey do the Local Butterfly Guy rap from Devilman Crybaby. It's best not to have Satan sing but he can get away with spoken word and raps quite well.

Leviathan and Beel: Has him doing Evil Food Eater Conchita from mothy. It's hard outside of his range but actually Levi pulls off the background vocals really well. He does some higher vocals well. Beel feels bad for the subject of the song...but sympathizes.

Leviathan and Belphie: Lizzy Hale and Lindsey Sterling's Shatter Me - Belphie can be convinced to do the ballet here and it's BEAUTIFUL. Neither Belphie nor Levi are the best of singers but they manage it together.And Belphie doing ballet is something to behold.

Karaoke Satan 

He's just NOT a singer - It doesn't matter that much - He know it drives Lucifer nuts because Lucifer is lovely to listen to. But he's in two minds. He's either sober and refuses to embarrass himself or is three sheets to the wind and WILL embarrass not himself but Lucifer rather. 

 Satan on his Own: Will do William Shatner's spoken word version of Rocket Man. Can be convinced to rap but doesn't get into it too much. 

 Satan and MC: David Bowie's 'Space Oddity’. He's off key the whole time but no one cares - they manage to do the acting for it.

 Satan and Lucifer : Here Comes the Snake by the Cherry Poppin' Daddies - It's rough but but Lucifer does the hard notes and Satan isn't pretty by any means but he does it a tad more spoken word. Lucifer does this like champ however. It winds up being way more attractive than it should be. 

 Satan and Mammon: Mammon does 'Every Last Motherfu*cker should Go Down' from Jerry Springer the Opera...and lets Satan choose if he wants to actually play Satan. He usually plays Jerry as a matter of fact. Up to the second half. After that Satan chokes it out. Because he'd love to stick it to Lucifer like that

Satan and Leviathan: An odd one - "Hell" By the Squirrel Nut Zippers. Levi would groove to it but everyone would enjoy joining in.

Satan and Asmo: (And everyone) Somebody to Love - Queen - and everyone shrieks it along. Cause Asmo would simply get in every one all in and that'd be that. Asmo's gonna hit that high note but Satan doing the song on his own isn't fabulous but he's backed by the whole group in the end. 

 Satan and Beel: Royal Oil by the Mighty Mighty Bosstones - Ska stuff works with Satan and Beel's rumble works with this song - it...didn't hurt that Satan explained what the song was about sometime LATER. 

 Satan and Belphie: Dark Personality by The Planet Smashers. Mammon gets to join in on this one - this is dedicated by that trio PERSONALLY to Lucifer. It's VICIOUS. Mammon is DEFINITELY in on skanking. He dances like a true rudeboy. Oh and so does Satan.

Karaoke Asmo

Is quite possibly the best Kareoke singer out there. It STINGS with him that he loses out to some of his brothers - Asmo's got charisma and sex appeal and a great voice...and well, that's actually where he loses. He's got this record quality voice and it tend to miss out on some of the kareoke appeal. Like that's the one place you're not supposed to be PERFECT singing and he IS. No fair!

Asmo on his own: Quite apart from this little ditty you may or may not of heard of "Sinful Indulgence" Asmo would do Marina Diamandos' alter Ego Electra Heart's "How to Be a Heartbreaker"

Asmo with MC: The Devil's Son by The Creepshow. It'd be verrry sexual. Asmo would however take over the song and be the singer - because it'd be right up his street.

Asmo and Lucifer: Nobody's Side - from CHESS. Lucifer does the intro to it just to get to get out of it - He plays the American (and does a fair job of it - he is after all quite vocally gifted) with Asmo as Florence.. Asmo is content to do the rest of the song. He's got the whole dramatic prodouction going on with it

Asmo and Mammon: If Mammon goes for Bowie, Asmo goes for Lady Gaga. They are going to do Applause and it's just as messy. They step all over eachother. Asmo's got the vocals to do it, Mammon's just simply not going to sit down for it and really won't outdo him on stage. It's a miracle they can throw it together.

Asmo and Leviathan: They're doing Pinball Wizard by the Who. They are actually a great team up for this song. Levi's got the moves and also digs the subject matter but Asmo gets to shine doing the lead singing on it

Asmo and Satan: Shut Me Up by Mindless Self Indulgence - Asmo is well aware that Satan can't carry a tune in a basket but is shockingly good at tempering him - Asmo is a great singer and can work with a lot. Satan's shrieking is actually quite awesome when paired with Asmo doing a sort of screechy emo/goth/metal thing himself. Asmo's the one you WANT  paired with Satan should you not want to visit the emergency room later. 

 Asmo and Beel: They are doing Cab Calloway's Minnie the Moocher and Oh GOD is it fun. Beel's still a little stiff as a performer but Asmo gets everyone into it - he covers (and gets everyone to do) the scatting...but absolutely lets Beel do the low notes at the end. Even he makes happy noises when he can get into those low registers and it turns out to be fun for all involved. 

 Asmo and Belphie: Funnily enough - it's Belphie who pulls this one off. And of all songs? It's Wonderboy by Tenacious D. (Seriously just imagine "How about the power of flight, that do anything for you? and Belphie just doing a straight up "That's levitation, Holmes." It's not Asmo's style but he's got the chops to back Belphie up on this one so it turns out fun.

Karaoke Beelzebub

Beel on his own: Can't be bothered much but bribe him with food and he's got this incredible baritone, and can get down to a bass. He sings what other people want him to so there's a bit of a dichotomy about the fact that people want him to do the Beast Song from "Over the Garden Wall" - it’s not Beel’s style to sing that but god he could do it if you asked. and also Barry White's "Can't Get Enough of your Love"

Beel and MC: Dearly Departed by the Creep Show. It's MC's show and Beel does the backups but there's a lot of onstage chemistry. Everyone feels a ...way afterwards.

Beel and Lucifer: Where the Wild Roses Grow by Nick Cave and Kylie - and yeah - Lucifer does the female part. It was sort of a joke that went in a really wildly sexual direction, but also it is capable of shutting down the whole night. Thankfully it was done at the end of the night.

Beel and Mammon: Mammon's got a bit of a penchant for musicals so he kinda is into doing a lil' bit of Little Shop of Horror's "Feed Me/Git It" Especially because he knows he could explain the concept and well yeah. Beel gets a LITTLE into it. "just pretend I ate your custard" And it's a done deal. Mammon also does a great Seymor. Beel and Leviathan: They're doing Zu Ende from Dracula Musical (Incidentally: if you want to know what my own voice is like - Wao Yoka is very close to me - if Wao was wite chick) - but Levi is doing Wao/Drac's part and Van Helsing's part is Beel's.

Beel and Satan:  Poe - Control - Satan lets Beel do this - but it's not melodic enough that he can pull some weight here. Beel backs down if Satan's managing it. But he more or less just lets Satan do the second verse.

Beel and Asmo: Sweet Tooth by Scott Helman - It's Asmo's song really but Beel doesn't over take Asmo and they really pull this off. Beel joins real hard at the end and it gets very good.

Beel and Belphie: Slumber by Bad Religion. This really is a duet. They both sing this together. Beel does the bridge however. Belphie does air guitar occasionally. It’s rather potent - they are twins and they use this distinctly to their advantage.

Karaoke Belphegor

Belphegor isn't much for this whole kareoke thing but can be convinced into it. Hey - his twin's great, why does he have to put in the effort? However - when the situation calls for it - hes got a variety of tricks up his sleeve.

Belphegor on his own: Picks the classics. Just whatever the place has in the book mostly. But paired up then this guy is a little shit. As a singer he's not the strongest but he's not bad either. When he's trying he's quite interesting when he's bored he's just...meh, knows it and does not care. I want Candy? These Boots were Made for Walkin? Yeah those are Belphie's stuff

Belphie and MC: Belphegor's still trying too hard with MC and so they're doing Strange Disease by Prozzak. He thinks it'll help. He's not bad at doing the recieved pronounciation accent either though at that.

Belphie and Lucifer: Belphie ain't letting Lucifer get away with SHIT. Belphie is making him full on do Aqua's Barbie Girl and that's that. It's...ridiculously funny as a matter of fact. Belphie's plan may have backfired a little given that everyone really likes singing along. On the other hand, he DID make Lucifer say "Come on Barbie, let's go party."

Belphie and Mammon: Corey Hart's Sunglasses at Night - with Mammon indeed wearing his sunglasses at night for maximum effect. Mammon's way more into it than Belphie but it's an entertaining performance nonetheless.

Belphie and Leviathan: The ODDEST combo but - Dionysos (F. Olivia Ruiz)' 'Tais Toi Mon Couer' - Levi likes the animation in the video and Belphie can pull off the french and the vibe. it's actually much more effective than Belphie's attempts to do anything with MC (and if you haven't seen the vid and don't speak French there's some vids with subtitles - see above!) Belphie and Satan: (with Mammon) When You're Evil by Voltaire - Dedicated FULLLY to Lucifer. And they all get into it. Mammon's particularly good at this - but while Satan isn't much of a singer he's just willing to keep up. Mammon carries this but it's this lot very much singing directly to Lucifer. It's honestly terrifying but man the Anti-Lucifer Club pulls this one off like champs.

Belphie and Asmo: They do Four Chord Song by Asis of Awesome - it Belphie's brain of 'easy' with Asmo's need to show off. They can do this very well. Asmo does wonderful masterful work but Belphie does the stuff that Asmo can't reach. They just do a medley.

Belphie and Beel: Stairway to Heaven by Led Zeplin - and oh - Belphie will turn off the kareoke machine and bust out his accoustic and put in the effort - So it's Rodrigo Y Gabriela's cover. Beel is all in for it. But it's really Belphie's talent with the guitar. In almost any other story Beel's voice is the thing but here? No it's him.

[tessatechaitea]

The Ray #5

The Ray Senior has six armpits.

It's hard to believe there was a time when comic books didn't acknowledge who did the cover. I suppose publishers simply thought comic book nerds were so rabid for the medium that they could instantly recognize the artist without any credit. Or maybe they figured if the reader was truly interested, they'd scour the cover to find the signature. That would answer the question, right?!

Oh yeah. Okay. That fucking helped nobody.

In 1994, good luck figuring out who the fuck this signature was by. Sure, you can read "Nichols" in that fucking doodle but that probably means you'd merely assume Art Nichols did the cover (if you even knew who the fuck that was). But no! This cover was by Joe Quesada and Art Nichols! Fucking Joe Quesada. How delusional do you have to be to think that a J stuck to a giant fucking rendition of Saturn would read "Joe Quesada" to anybody who didn't already fucking know that that was his pretentious signature?! I suppose if my understanding of the musculature of the human body was on Joe's level, I'd want to obfuscate my name too. Some people who have only grown up with the Internet might not entirely understand my issue. When they first encountered an artist they really liked, they probably learned all about that artist immediately. But back in 1994, if your local comic book store owner (and the owner back then was almost always the clerk (okay, maybe not in 1994. But in the 70s and early 80s, definitely)) couldn't answer any questions you had (if you could bring yourself to actually engage them in conversation, of course), you were shit out of luck. Sure, you might send a letter to DC and then hoped they'd answer it in a future issue of the comic book that maybe you were still continuing to read. Or maybe you'd have a more knowledgeable comic book friend. But what you almost certainly didn't have was an easy way to find out answers to mysterious things. Maybe you were lucky enough to have AOL or Prodigy but was your question being answered so important that you would submit yourself to a comic book AOL chatroom? Almost certainly not! You'd just live with a mystery for awhile and hope that maybe, some day, you'd get satisfaction. I'm definitely not saying it was better in the past! If you somehow got that out of what I just read, you're probably a bit too defensive and maybe you should relax a little bit. And speaking of generation gaps, this cover is apparently about a generation gap! It's father vs. sun in a knockdown, drag-out battle that absolutely nobody fucking cared about! Most of us bought this issue thinking, "I hope The Ray finally buys that fridge!"

I know what the Oedipal and Electra Complexes are but what do you call it when you want to both kill and fuck your father?

The Ray is drunk on the energy he absorbed from the Light Entity. Older The Ray seems angry and violent from the energy. I'm sure once the energy dissipates, the two will have said everything they needed to say and they'll hug. And judging from the above panels, maybe they'll suck a little dick too. Older The Ray absorbs The Ray's powers and teleports him all over the world to teach him that the world has problems that can't be solved by punching Doomsday in the throat. And they certainly can't be solved by a reckless teenager using his powers to fly to Hawaii to get laid and murder other super heroes. So Older The Ray decides he needs to take away The Ray's powers forever. I don't know how he has that kind of power and why he didn't do it when The Ray was younger so The Ray could have a regular childhood. He probably decides to do it now because he's simply an asshole. And also maybe because Zero Hour happens next issue. Except it's all some kind of test and The Ray doesn't ever actually lose his powers. This story definitely isn't making Golden Age The Ray any fans. Was he always a gigantic asshole? Maybe Christopher Priest just believes the same thing I do: dads are kind of dicks. Some people think the song "Cat's in the Cradle" is sad but I think it's a triumph of the spirit! Stick it to that fucking asshole old man, kid! Finally, Older The Ray screams at The Ray about how much he sacrificed to give him a decent life while his son, The Ray, just weeps uncontrollably. Because why the fuck should the son care what the parent sacrificed when that decision cost the son so much? And the father didn't fucking care about that at all. It's just "Me me me!" and "Look what I had to go through!" and "You don't know how much I suffered!" But all the son fucking wants is his father. Nothing else fucking matters and why should it? The son is angry and hurt and upset and he doesn't need to hear his father's excuses or rationalizations or explanations as to why he wasn't there. The bottom fucking line is that he wasn't there. He was never there. And now that he is, he thinks his son somehow owes him unconditional love? Fuck that guy. But in the end, they hug because Older The Ray maybe sort of gets it. His son just wants a father, not some guy teaching him how to be a super hero. It might be a happy ending but I'm fucking pissed. I hope Zero Hour erases Golden Age The Ray from existence!

I hope Issue #0 resolves the fridge situation.

The Ray #5 Rating: B-. I know a lot of father/son relationships never have problems. But a lot of them do. And, eventually, many of those fathers and sons work through their problems to become friends of sorts. But fuck that bullshit. I'll take on their bitterness and resentment and hatred and keep it stored safely in my cold fucking heart. I will cherish those feelings of ill will and hurt. I will become an Anger Elemental and I will makes sure that fathers everywhere never again perceive a world in which their child owes them something. They owe you fucking nothing, no matter how good or bad you were to them. Accept what they can give you and stop being a huge fucking prick, Lloyd. I mean anonymous fathers.

[darlingnisi]

Celebration Day 3 : VIP Edition

Part 2 Here!

Funk Soldiers Panel

Shelby J

Kat Dyson

Xavier Taplin

Joey Rayfield

Kip Blackshire

About Last Night... (The Prince on the Big Screen event)

A lot of reherasal

Kirk organized everyone, got the materials out

Biggest challenge was that there were a lot of performers who worked with P at different times so the arrangements of the songs were often different. Hard to sync up with the show or pick the right one to use at first

Shelby said it was hard not to turn and look at him on the screen

The fludidity of the performance came with experience because they knew what P expected of them musically

Kat said “having him in my ear floated me back to my time with him” The instructions he gave inside of the performance still applied

Joey noted that he better understood the difference between just playing and performance from his time with Prince

“I almost forgot he wasn’t there”

Kat Dyson Origin Story (Guitar)

Recommended by Sheila E. Kat and Rhonda Smith met Sheila while demoing gear at an industry show. Sheila asked for their music as she had an idea to do an all girl band at the time. She got sick and gave their info to P. P took them both on.

Their audition was a four hour jam session in 96. P asked Kat “How much of my material do you know...and how much did you buy?”

Her favorite P music are the soundtracks, especially Batman and her favorite songs are Joy of Repetition and Question of You.

She and Rhonda did an arrangement for Question of You for him.

Xavier Taplin Origin Story (Organ)

Played with and was reccomend by Gouche, another NPG member

Audition was P on Bass and Job Blackwell on Drums. They played 777-9311 and P had him solo for 60 bars. He fell back into the groove and P told him to keep going...fell back into the groove again...and P told him to keep going. P put his bass down, walks over to  Xavier, and stands “uncomfortably close for 15 seconds just looking at me” he then says “We’re going to have a lot of fun.”

Joey Rayfield (Trombone)

Gets a call from Adrian Crutcfield about an audition in Charolette North Carolina. Gets PDF of a chart for Xtraloveable and realizes it’s for Prince

They have a Skype audition.

Time passes and he randomly got an email with a Delta ticket to Minneapolis. He quit his job and left for Paisley.

At first played on Andy Allo’s Supeconductor sessions.

Story : during a rehearsal P slowly walks up to the stage and says “You and Ida go play ping pong and if you win, I’ll play you. Joey wins and plays Prince. Joey’s in his dress shoes though and is slipping and sliding everywhere. P stops the game, moves a rug to be under Joey and says “I ain’t got no insurance.”

Story from Kat : I played basketball with him. Nobody told me not to block his shot. The game was over after that.

Kip : I was playing with him in the Daisy Chain video.

Kip Blackshire Origin Story (Vocals)

Morris Hayes invited him to a Carlos Sananta show and Jam session at Paisley. Kip absently playing basketball. Hears a “clang” (P dropping his guitar). P comes over and squares up with Kip. Kip passes P the ball, and P checks him hard in the stomach with it. Kip says he isn’t dressed to play and P tells him to come back the next day to play for real. The next day they play a 2 on 2 game. Kirk/Prince vs. Morris/Kip.

Was cleaning up in the bathroom and absently singing. P overhears and invites him to sing with them in the studio. P asks him if he knows Little Red Corvette and Kip says “I wasn’t allowed to listen to you growing up.” Instead P played guitar and Kip answered his licks with his voice. He was invited to join the band and the first song he sang on was Undisputed from Rave.

Shelby J Origin Story (Vocals)

Audition for Larry G’s band. Got in and was at 3121 doing a rehearsal. Kept being told to re-sing Higher Ground. It was P asking.

Was singing I Can’t Stand the Rain during a show. Crowd goes wild and she thought she was “DOING IT!” turns out P had come on stage behind her and was plugging up his guitar to join them. He came up to her mic and sang cheek to cheek with her for that song.

Was in Walmart getting supplies at home when she got invited to sing at one of his shows NYE. From there she was asked to join the band and their next gig was the Superbowl.

Arrangement Panel with Michael B Nelson

Had done work with Micheal Bland. There was an idea for a warm up group early 90′s. Dave and Kathy Jenson with Michael B Nelson, Sonny, and Tommy B made up a 5 piece band. They recorded some tracks and sent it to P. P told them to go to a Carmen Electra rehearsal to be filmed. Time passes asked to come to the soundstage at Paisley...saw pedal boards set up P was there! NPG was very tight at this time so P just held up a signal and they started into Madhouse 4. The horns were shocked for a moment then fell in (this was their audition). They jammed for 6 hours then recorded for the first time that same day....Sexy MF? (This may be wrong...he mentioned that they recorded for the first time that day, then a moment later said the first thing they recorded was Sexy MF as part of a different story so...take that how you will)

Told to get their passports together. They joined him on the Diamonds and Pearls tour

There were 11 semi trucks and 110 people in the entourage for the D&P tour. Their first stop with him was Tokyo

Hornheads was formulated as a horns only group since they were on with P and couldn’t play with anyone else, they just made a mini group to keep their chops up during down time. Mike Nelson wrote the tunes and they have 3 albums.

“Even when he was giving you a hard time, he’s just pushing you”

Q: What was it like during the 90′s? Every office was filled. He gave you exactly what you needed to fufill a task. You didn’t ask for additional questions...you had to trust yourself and know that he trusted you to use your creativity wisely.

Prince preferred Duke Ellington’s style of horns

P would send Mike tapes of a lead line and melody and Mike would add horn parts.

Mike did Black Muse, new Xtraloveable, When She Comes, Groovy Potential, Morning Papers and more (He’s been around for about 25 years)

Percentage of things recorded to released of the work Mike did. 50%

He co-wrote Billy Jack Bitch. While they were working on something, Mike played P a song during tape change. P said “Who do I have to pay to use that” The instrumental part of Billy Jack Bitch was written by Mike.

Story : Working on something and Mike B was impressed with how it sounded. Forgot everything he said could be heard in the control room by P. Commented “man that is funky” P responds “yes it is.”

Story : Tenor sax was playing a solo while working on something and it didn’t go well. When it was done, from the control room P says “You guys see Waterworld?” Tenor sax guy “No who’s in it” Prince, “Your mama” Tenor sax guy, “Oh it’s good to know she’s getting work!” “Prince falls off his chair from laughing” (Waterworld has a reputation for being a very bad movie.)

Q: Why did you last? P told him “You and Clare Fischer really understand my music.” Was asked to be full time in 2012. He never had a falling out or harsh words with P and P never rejected any of his additions to his songs.

Got our pictures from our tour back. Framing mine for sure! It’s like my 5th picture in here and the only good one, lol...

Funk Soldiers Concert

Honesty we were all kind of weary about this as this seemed to be a remix of the NewPower Soul group to some degree...or at least that concept, but once again VERY happy to be completely checked about the assumption because they were PHENOMENAL and not just because of something that happened...! Set list : 

I’m Yours

I Feel For You

Party Man

Girls and Boys

Lady Cab Driver/Irresistible Bitch mashup (!)

1+1+1 is 3 (I LOST. MY. MIND. YA’LL KNOW THAT ONE NIGHT ALONE TIME PERIOD IS MY COMPLETE FAVORITE AND NOBODY DOES COVERS OF THOSE SONGS AND IT WAS SO GOOD!)

The Work Part 1 (I WAS ABSOLUTELY DELIRIOUS! AGAIN BECAUSE THIS IS MY ERA AND NOBODY DOES THIS! I was so into it singing, foot stomping and dancing, I got tapped by security and they asked if I want to go on stage! I 100% always say I’d never do it, but I thought I’d get to jam out to The Work since that goes on for a bit. I got back stage and they said I was to be part of a dance battle (WHAT?! I LEGIT AM THE MOST RESERVED PERSON USUALLY ABSOLUTELY NOT! (And also I guess for The Professor, lol) So me and Lenny Beason (from Purple Underground who thankfully I mostly know in real life so I was comfortable) were to battle to...

Black Sweat (Kip told me to go first so I tried to do every dance I could think of...The Housequake, The Get Off dance, Tried to remember the Purple Funk SF Funknroll dance but my mind blanked so I did some booty pops and stopped on the accents with a pose. Lenny went during the next chorus...then I had to go again. Shelby said I’m her funk sister now and we got T-shirts! My heart was beating so fast ya’ll! It pays to love The Rainbow Children! LOL!

Chelsea Rodgers

Xtraloveable (AGAIN A DREAM COME TRUE I’VE ALWAYS WANTED TO HEAR THIS LIVE WITH THESE GUYS DOING THE HORNS!)

Big City

Welcome 2 the Dawn (SO glad they did this instead of Purple Rain! Amazing choice! A Great song!)

Paisley Park

All the Critics Love You in New York/Housequake Jumps

Alphabet Street (Sheila E came out and crowd surfed for a bit)

Very good job! They were very tight, funky, and kept everyone’s spirits WAY up, especially with the EXCELLENT choice of Welcome 2 the Dawn being the only slow song.

This day was the 21st and honestly it was a BLUR. Even if I hadn’t gotten chosen by Ghost Prince to go up, the experience the band gave us with their energy and love made it hard to be sad this day. For me, interestingly I had a harder time on the 20th seeing him up there at the Big Screen event and with all the news that came out on the previous Thursday...did stay in bed for a bit that day to be honest...but “the day” was so full of just AMAZING like he legit came down like “ya’ll don’t cry for me...look at all this that I left behind for you to enjoy!” This day was was distracting with so much information followed by such an explosive show! Everyone was on their feet dancing, singing, hands in the air, just the whole time!

I’m very glad the days for the arena event got switched because it honestly would have been too much for me if it fell on this day...

Last part here!

[blackhyena]

tagged by @simonjpg thanks babe this looks really fun!

rules: list 10 artists you like before answering these questions

bat for lashes

florence & the machine

kasabian

grimes

lana del rey

the last shadow puppets

marina and the diamonds

susanne sundfor

st vincent

wolf alice

what was the first song you heard by 6? oooooo fuck its really hard to say when i first got into them/when they entered my life. i think i first listened to the i want you (shes so heavy) or maybe the S.O.S cover and was just very into it and decided to find out more

what is your favourite song by 8? urghhh theyre all so good! i mean lilith is absolutely phenomenal so probably that but theres so many that i love

what kind of impact has 1 left on your life? like......nobody else that i know is into bat for lashes and if they are its never as much as i love her. which is a shame cause shes amazing and deserves to be way more popular. so for me its a very personal thing and some of her latest album was really like, part of a healing process for me at a difficult time and its all immensely emotionally powerful for me. natasha khan im free on thursday if you want to hang out pleasse call me i love you

what are your favourite lyrics by 5? uuhhhh probably from This Is What Makes Us Girls:

There she was my new best friend High heels in her hands, swayin' in the wind While she starts to cry, mascara runnin' down her little Bambi eyes: "Lana, how I hate those guys."

honorable mention goes to the spoken word bit from Lolita which makes me lose my god Damn mind

how many times have you seen 4 live? i havent seen her yet :((((((( big sad

what is your favourite song by 7? uhhh i mean electra heart is a masterpiece but i have so much nostalgia for The Family Jewels. I used to listen to The Outsider when i was younger and think I was really edgy but it still has a really big place in my heart so maybe that?

is there any song by 3 that makes you sad? GOODBYE KISS ;___;

what is your favourite song by 9? ooooooo at the moment i’m really into like......All of the new album but particularly Smoking Section

how did you first get into 2? i remember seeing the video for Raise It Up and thinking it was weird but liking it and then reading an article about her in Q magazine. usually i hate an artist i later get into irrationally before I change my mind for good, but I didn’t really do that with her, I thought she was cool as fuck from day one

how did you get into 10? Iheard She on xfm before they’d released their first album and recognised the name from Angela Carter’s The Bloody Chamber which I’d read earlier that year I think, and and thought hey!!!! thats something I’m into!! so I was kinda instantly into them, and ive loved them ever since basically

i shall tag uhhh @bisexualaudreyhorne @icanstillfeelyou @ceolfriths @beau--brummell @nickcavelesbian @bubblegmhrt @oranges-of-symmetry @maisonderriere @sebastianmicgaylis

[bellesdomain]

Starlight Express Workshop - Thurs 14th Sept

Let me preface this with my overall impressions - this show was fantastic in many ways, the performances were all amazing, the band was fantastic, the staging was remarkably full and entertaining given the circumstances!  It was an absolutely fascinating experience, I’m so glad I had the chance to go - and that I’m going again to see how it develops further.  

But as reviews like this are bound to, this is all going to come across as very negative - but I want to start off emphasising how much I enjoyed it overall!

The theatre is a small, steeply raked auditorium, with a thrust stage about level with the 3rd row.  The stairways on either side were accessible from the stage and used in the performance.  There’s a gantry upstage, which forms a platform for the 8 piece band and Control - yup, live Control onstage.  He had fabulous glowing headphones and an Ipad that seemed to be a racing game - I think it also included his script! ��Generally I am very anti-live Control, when it comes to non-replica productions - since the entire show takes place in his imagination, he exists on a different plane to the action therefore they shouldn’t interact. But given the fluid nature of this workshop, pre-recording the kid would be impossible so it worked ok!

The show opened with Andrew Lloyd Webber and Arlene Phillips giving us the context of the evening.  Lloyd Webber explained how they’d workshopped “School of Rock” in a similar manner - no big automation, complex lighting cues or costume changes, just establishing the story telling.  Great concept!  And the venue “The Other Palace” theatre in Victoria, is being run for precisely this function.

Lloyd Webber also told us how he and Arlene Phillips had visited the German production for the English Gala, and he hardly recognised the show they were performing as his work.  And indeed, I was also at the English Gala and suddenly hearing the material in its original language made the inconsistencies and plot holes glaringly obvious!  So the point of this workshop is to see if they can get the show back into shape for a future production, as well as the German production’s 30th anniversary next May.

The show opened in a familiar manner, Control (playing with his ipad), sent to bed by his Mother. She sings her lullaby, the melody is taken up by the mouth organ.  The Overture modulates, repeats, swells, in the fans’ mind’s eye you see the shadowy figures skating around the set - and then Control interrupts with “Stop that Boring Music!” And begins to introduce the National Engines.

I think it’s fair to say this change is getting a bit of negative feedback.  That overture is the literal HEART of the show, it’s the preview of the Starlight Sequence, it’s the title song melody.  It’s the magic happening, as Control falls asleep and we enter his dreamscape.  The Overture alone will literally draw people to tears.  To have Control dismiss it as “boring music” is crass, insensitive, and a tonal mis-fire, alienating Control from the audience.  In other words, he’s a brat!

Entry of the National Trains is always a clunky way to start the show, these minor characters are so unimportant to the plot.  Placing the scene later, before AC/DC, makes for better story telling, as the audience have already established who’s important and it contextualises Electra’s entrance as we’re calling forward the competitors for the race. Anyway, the workshop has given us some new names for the Nationals - Bobo the French train is now the feminine Coco, which works well.  The German Engine is now named after Wagner’s opera das Rheingold. Rather than fix the dated and embarrassing reference, the Japanese train is still Nintendo.  And the British train is now “Brexit” - which is as topical a joke, and I suspect will last in the public conscious about as well as his APT designation did.  Yeah, that’s the point. Nobody remembers!  A very quickly dated reference.  There were a few of them throughout the night, so hopefully they’ll be reconsidered. Rolling Stock - Oliver Tompsett as Greaseball, greased back hair and stubble, was hilarious and a bit menacing - would probably be more menacing if I weren’t so steeped in his performances from Rock of Ages!  The strangest thing here though, was it. Was. so. Slow. There’s a strange quirk that the 1984 original cast recording has the Rolling Stock track at a stodgy plod - as if an LP record is played on the wrong setting! And this is what they decided to replicate live.  The performances were all brilliant, the ensemble mugging it up as their Nationals, it was hilarious and engaging, but why so slow?  As far as I know, it wasn’t performed that slow in 1984, it’s just a quirk of the recording -  but Andrew Lloyd Webber obviously approved of this!

Second number in was Crazy.  Throughout, Crazy and Call Me Rusty have been mixed up and cut together - along with remnants of Engine of Love in there as well.  It works, sort of, plot-wise it’s exactly like Engine of Love, here’s young Rusty and the coaches.  There’s a lovely bit of contextualisation where Control explains “Rusty is the first train I got when I was six” which grounds us as these are his toys.  Then into Crazy.  George Ure as Rusty may have dried on his opening lyrics, but a bit of ad-libbing and he was back on track.  Christina Bennington as Pearl got straight in there with the high option for Pearl’s “Til someone better comes along”.

Greaseball, Nationals come in to bully Rusty, and the coaches all stick up for him, however Pearl makes the point that she’s not actually Rusty’s partner, flirting with Greaseball.  Then we have a version of “Call Me Rusty”, the short version used in Vegas I believe, layering “Call me Rusty if you dare. Call me Rusty if you like…”  with the coaches still having the mid break from the original but with some new lyrics from Pearl about “we’re just friends”. Rusty is sent to fetch the trucks, and we have the original intro into Locomotion, “Rusty/can’t/be serious, him/go in/for the race?” but then there was some new material, Greaseball flirting with Pearl, saying “woowoowoo you’re brand new!” Dinah comes forward to warn him off Pearl but she gets sent to “go make the tea” by Greaseball and the Nationals.  Here’s where we’re introduced to Tassita (shhh she’s a quiet coach and doesn’t like loud noises), and we go into the new song to “introduce” the coaches, “I Got Me (and that’s all I need)”  This song felt to me like there’s some School of Rock type influence.  It’s very “I can do what I like” independent rock chick.  It’s not a bad song, but it doesn’t serve the purpose of introducing these characters at all, plus the pedantic mind says that these girls are railway coaches - and coaches DO need an engine.  Sorry to break the vibe but coaches aren’t independent - but you can easily argue the case that an engine without coaches is as useless as coaches without an engine.  The song ended quite abruptly to muted applause, but launched straight into a reprise, which was then interrupted by the Freight train.

Freight ran exactly as the 1992 London, with all the banter from the coaches, which was particularly entertaining despite being such very familiar lyrics.  Whether it was due to the small ensemble, or an effort to address the gender imbalance in the show, Hopper 3 was female, and she was having a great time of it.  Sadly no return of the Rockies, the Hip Hoppers are about the only remaining remnant of the contributions made by David Yazbek in 2003.  The only new moment in the number was one of the most jarring changes - Caboose is included, but rather than introduce himself using the “There’s Me” melody (“at the back on every piece of track…”  Being “All alone, you think you’re on your own…”) no, the Red Caboose comes straight in with “Wide Smile, High Style” melody, telling us straight off that he’s in the business of wrecking trains. His characterisation was very much aggressive, nasty and scary!  No pretense at the sweet and helpful Caboose that anyone would trust, this guy is clearly one to avoid.  Caboose made a point about being paid to do his job.

Straight after Freight, we have Control announcing technical problems…  oh boy! A late entry!  These must be his minders! Kilowatt is Electra’s security truck. Wrench is the repair truck, Purse the money truck ordered us to switch your accounts to Electra.  Again money is an active concept in this world.  Joule and Volta followed - male Volta, as with Hopper 3 is this a limitation of the size of ensemble?

Electra appeared in towering red velour heels, fishnet stockings under a conventional masculine ensemble of slacks and jacket.  Liam Tamne has an incredible voice, great range and strength and falsetto! But his characterisation flat for my personal taste for Electra, and also really reminded me of someone else, a character on TV perhaps.  He was very flamboyant and self-indulgent.

AC/DC is interrupted suddenly, as Greaseball appears.  The coaches, who 10 mins earlier were making such a point of not needing no man, especially Dinah getting up in the faces of the Nationals to protect Pearl, undergo a complete 180 on their characters, turning to the regular excited fangirls we’re used to seeing in Pumping Iron.  This felt especially wrong given Dinah’s “Back off girls, he’s mine!” - really?  Is he?  Because you were defending your girls from his flirting just now, and showed no suggestion of a relationship between Dinah and Greaseball other than antagonism.  The earlier scene is massively out of character for Dinah.

Oliver Tompsett rocked Pumping Iron, of course, it’s easy to appreciate why the girls are all fangirling over him.  The two female components stayed to dance, while Electra and his boys left in a huff.  This was one scene where the minimal staging fell flat, as the dance break needs some rock’n’roll partner work, skates or not.  

Coda Freight ran much as expected, the confrontation between Greaseball and Electra was extended by the two of them sharing the lines usually sung by the Nationals, as they mock Rusty’s intent to join the race.  Coda Freight originally did not modulate key - the German production is one where it drops into a lower key which always jars. But this time we get a modulation UP a key, which is different! But not necessary, it’s quite busy enough staying in one key.

Control announces five minutes to race time, and “if you ain’t in twos, you lose”.  This is where we would expect to find Crazy, and indeed we have a reprise of the number where Rusty approaches Pearl, but she rebuffs him with something about “don’t push me around”.  But then their conversation follows the coaches’ melody from “Call me Rusty”, as she explains in no uncertain terms that while she likes him she wants an engine of the future.  Then they are interrupted by Electra’s Bodyguard Kilowatt (shall we just call him K?) who explains Electra’s coach has a “Migraine”. Pearl has her dilemma, and will let Electra know.

Pearl has a new intro to “Make Up My Heart”, written to the “diddlydiddly” pre-race music (also used by Caboose pre-”Wide Smile”), as she discusses how Electra seems fun, then she had an echo of “He Whistled At Me” - which I think was the only occurrence of that/”Engine of Love” melody.  Then that disjointed selection of melodies led into the full “Make Up My Heart” number, as performed on the 1992 London recording.

Control starts the races, with a comment about “I’ll pick your partners for you”.  A new addition for the races which grew very tedious almost immediately, each engine as they’re introduced, sings the “Clear my track, this is my train now, this could be my dream, clear my track” fragment of “No Comeback” that Pearl sings in “Laughing Stock” - each with their own lyrics of course.  But hearing that same fragment four times in a row was repetitive, and annoying given that that melody is meant to specifically refer to Electra.  The concept of melodies referring to specific characters and event - the use of leitmotif - has more or less been lost, apart from a few occasions which shows that while they COULD use the concept, they choose not to!  Race 1 ends up with a Dead Heat between Greaseball and Electra, with only the “No Comeback” melody appearing in the race music.

As the racers clear away, we have a mopey Rusty with the “Call me Rusty” melody on the mouth organ, as he approaches the Freight yard and “Momma” is singing The Blues.  Mica Paris was poorly served by the existing score - while the major solos are within a reasonable alto range, most of Poppa’s recit is well below an alto.  However her character, and the staging for the number was really engaging and fun, and included Caboose mooching in the background.  Caboose has always seemed notable by his absence from this scene of the Freight - I presume the practical reason is that Caboose has just finished racing so to make him immediately be onstage but purely for context would be unkind.  But within the world of the show, why is Caboose not hanging out with the rest of the freight?   Momma’s response after “Let me hear you say Steam!” - the Starlight Express melody - is “When the Night is Darkest” rather than “When Your Goodnights have been Said”, which probably only coincidentally is kinder on her vocal range. But it’s slightly odd in a production that draws so heavily from the previous London productions, to bring in the Broadway variation of the title song.   Control interrupts to inform us of heat 2, Momma decided to race and ends up with Dustin much as is familiar from other productions.  The exact reason was unclear but Brexit meant the British train was missing, allowing Momma to race.  

Race Two again seemed to have Control decide the race partners, and again repeated the “Clear my Track” melody, except Momma introduced herself with the Coaches’ “I got Me” melody which seems to be pretty random for an old Steamer.  It was also incorporated into the race music.  

After Race 2, into Laughing Stock, played much as normal, but with one small 1984 detail restored - Momma points out Rusty “Couldn’t face that losing shame!”  rather than Rusty admitting his own weakness, or the line being omitted altogether.

Starlight Express - the title song closed act 1 with an unexpectedly subtle edit, new lyrics to the “When the Night is Darkest” melody.  I’m not absolutely sure new lyrics were needed for this number, but they’re evocative and very much in keeping with the scene and Rusty’s emotional journey.

(And we have the interval.  Go get a glass of wine.  You’ll need it.)

Act 2 begins with The Rap - entirely a capella, started by Hoppers “Are you Ready?” which updated lyrics. The Coaches come in with something like “Swipe to the left? Swipe to the right?  Who will be my date tonight?” which feels like it’ll date very quickly.  It was a mix between the 1992 Rap in structure, “Gotta be in the frame if you’re gonna win the game, are you ready for the big one, ready!” with quite a lot of the individual lines tweaked.  This meant that we’ve still got all the “Shut it, Dinah!” and some of the classic lines like “losing the race with this floppy disc” and “Boil with the oil or lose with the fuse”.  Performed entirely unaccompanied, with much stomping on the beat, worked really well.

“Pearl Twirl” ran unaltered, giving Dinah a COMPLETE character shift from act 1.  The confident, sassy girl is completely unrecognisable as the heartbroken Dinah singing “Uncoupled”. Fantastic performance from Natalie McQueen, really heart-felt and beautifully sung, but it was distracting how she seemed to be playing a completely different role to earlier.  The staging was even much as normal, with the other two coaches hanging out behind, with varying levels of sympathy and boredom as they sing backing vocals. But without Dinah having established a character of a devoted, in love with Greaseball, the song was very out of place.

Invitation Dinah included some new material, a longer conversation between the girls, with Dinah saying “I can’t manage on my own” - again, this is not the Dinah we saw in act 1.  The line “But if Greaseball changes his mind!” is in there.  Tassita and Belle have very little to do - no Girls Rolling Stock - but whereas in the past the coaches only had “Oh, Dinah!” to express their frustration, this gives them a little dialogue.

Caboose’s scenes in the middle of act 2 almost had me vocalising my frustration!  This scene is one of my biggest problems in the current show AND IT HAS NOT BEEN CHANGED!

First, Caboose tells Greaseball that Rusty is fast, and they plot as in the US Tour with Greaseball’s “Ohh that’s nasty, I like it!”. This conversation also gives us the existing line “Just cos I smile all the time, don’t mean I’m not into crime”.  This is not news, this is not a reveal, and this Caboose has only been smiling in an evil, mean way. There’s been no pretense at Caboose being helpful or sweet, he’s been flat-out nasty from the beginning.

Then we have the Disco-tastic 1984 version of “Wide Smile” which repeated the  “Just cos I smile all the time, don’t mean I’m not into crime” line, and included “Under the smiles, under the fun I’m public enemy number 1” - again, there’s not been any fun or smiles from this Caboose!  Also they use the full 1984 “CB” lyrics including the CB radio references which were cut for the Broadway show in 1987 as too obscure!

Patrick Sullivan’s performance was extraordinary, hitting those falsetto notes, amazing energy and rhythm, a really enjoyable number.  I don’t know if I should read significance into Electra not joining in the backing for the number, but it was only the components.

The problem is though this scene is a MASSIVE plot point.  It should be the moment we learn that Caboose is a cheating back-stabbing bastard, but this has already been established.  Also, there is a logical gap in this number - with Electra well aware of Caboose’s enjoyment of double-crossing, why on earth does Electra then choose Caboose as a race partner for the downhill final?  Especially when surrounded by his components, any of which would be a suitable race partner. The simple solution, which I was hoping this workshop would consider, would be for Electra to be removed from this scene.  Simply continue the song on from Caboose’s conversation with Greaseball, have Greaseball’s gang as the backing dancers rather than Electra’s components. Then, Electra is unaware of Caboose’s scheme, his choice of race partner makes sense.  This would also remove a flabby feeling repeat of the material as different versions have been grafted together.

Race 3 - the Uphill Final - begins with Control announcing Greaseball and Pearl, Electra and Dinah, and Rusty and Caboose.  This race has not had the extra “No Comeback” repetitions, but rather the normal spoken lines from each Engine including Rusty’s “Let’s hear it for Steam!”  

No explanation is given as to how there are only three engines, since Control earlier quoted the 1992 London instructions “There are two heats, two qualifiers from each heat”.  So what happened to the 2nd qualifier from Heat 2?  Why did only Momma come through from that race?

Well, I can tell you why, it’s because Control’s lines are taken from the 1992 London, but the races are taken from the 2003 US Tour with the pre-recorded 3D races.  Because the tour ran with only 4 Nationals including the British train, the races were run on the logic of two heats, and the winner from each would compete in the final, which should have consisted of two engines.  But since Electra and Greaseball tied, they both went through to give us 3 engines in the final.  But this story telling has been overlooked in this workshop.

The race was staged with Caboose literally picking up Rusty to make it clear he wasn’t going anywhere!  The race music also included the inverted race melody, the descending phrase as used in Germany which always jars when used to the London versions.  The Race music did include the “Wide Smile” motif. Rusty was thrown to the floor, injured, as Control shouts “Race Cancelled!  Who did it?  I didn’t do anything!” - again the 1992 London script.  

The 1992 London show was the production which cut Caboose - which is particularly relevant in this part of the show, as without Caboose driving the story, the London show included material to patch over the holes.  This material was then drafted into the UK Tour in 2004, to cover gaps where some of the David Yazbek contributions were removed, I believe.  However the result is that there are two separate scenes which cover the same actions.  

Firstly, the Caboose version is that Caboose has crashed Rusty.  The original London staging in 1984 was one of the weaker points of the show, where a fairly illogical staging required all the racers to make it onto the bridge to be carried to the top level, mid-race.  CB slowed Rusty to the point he missed the connection and the race was then cancelled due, I believe, to the fighting between Greaseball and Electra.  This had Rusty challenge Greaseball with “That CB he never took off the brakes”, which is when Pearl realised that Greaseball and CB were in cahoots.  The original version didn’t have Rusty injured apart from his pride, but gave us CB’s insane “10, 10 never again you’re no engine!”.  CB’s gloating and insane pleasure at the damage he has caused is an essential part of his character arc.  The German staging had Rusty crash and tumble down the bowl to land in a heap centre stage, where Greaseball and Pearl came by, with Pearl saying “I’ll go tell the Marshalls!” then as Greaseball pulls her away, she begins to realise she’s made mistakes.  

Secondly, the No Caboose version, the London 1992 version, has to find another reason for Rusty to be out of the race.  The Uphill final is cancelled by Control when it’s devolved into a fist fight on the bridge, Control didn’t see what happened so Greaseball and Electra jump on the chance to blame Rusty - “Rusty did it, he caused the wreck!”  Greaseball then confesses “Shut it, I did it, he was good, he was fast” - without Caboose in the show, this comes as a surprise.  The Marshalls have been wordlessly clearing everything up, Rusty then comes back to Greaseball with “They (the marshalls) say - “  “what do they say?”  Greaseball then sics his gang on Rusty, to “make sure it won’t happen again”.  The Gang then beat up Rusty (to the melody of “Wide Smile”) in order to bring him to the same, injured and dejected state, as if Caboose had been there.

These two separate scenes have been smashed together since the US Tour in 2003 gave the show major re-writes, and the story being told is flabby and confusing.  If Rusty has been wrecked by Caboose, is already on his knees and his confidence destroyed, why do the gang need to beat him up directly?  Unless the staging includes Marshalls directing the clean-up, who is Rusty talking about with “They say”?  If Caboose is there, then how does the line “You told the Marshalls I drove into you!” make any sense?  

The Workshop gives us the current version of this scene, with the 1992 London version of the show, including Greaseball and gang beating up Rusty.  Then Pearl wanders in, sees Rusty wrecked on the floor, and realises things are going bad “This wasn’t how I wanted it, this wasn’t what I saw” (what had you seen, Pearl?  We no longer have He Whistled At Me to specify her dreams and ambitions)  Flat-top has his sympathetic line “Give it up Rusty, you’ll never beat them”, and Caboose has just left. Then we have a reprise of “Crazy” at a slow, reflective pace, as the badly injured Rusty picks himself up. This reflects back to Rusty’s naive hopeful attitude at the start of the show, contrasting his previous optimism with his sad current state.  Then we hear the “Call Me Rusty” refrain on the mouth organ as standard. This reflects back to Rusty’s naive hopeful attitude at the start of the show, contrasting his previous optimism with his sad current state.  Yes, the concept of Rusty’s confident introductory number being reprised in a slow, sad tone is exactly repeated in this scene.

Where we’d expect Right Place, Right Time, we have the Hoppers wander in and paraphrase the opening lines of the number, without any particular motivation for their presence, but the full number is omitted. This scene feels like it might be a compromise as the work in progress nature of the workshop, where this is a place-holder for a new version of the full number for the Hip Hoppers.  

Rusty, alone and dejected, runs into the Starlight Sequence as normal, reflecting on how he’s “down and out”.   The Starlight Sequence is always magnificent,  but it was slightly soured after Control’s “Stop that Boring music!” comment during the overture, which is of course a preview of this scene. Mica Paris as Momma wasn’t quite comfortable with the vocal range of the song but at some moments opened up sounded glorious.  There were also some slight lyric paraphrases such as “The Starlight Express is no more or less, I’m you, Rusty”, which doesn’t quite make sense, but I suspect was simply the nature of the workshop rather than a deliberate change. George Ure’s performance was stunning and so emotional, he really carried us on Rusty’s journey.

The Rusty and Dustin scene has some new music, using the same melody as Rusty’s monologue prior to the Starlight Sequence, the melody most characterised as the Coaches’ verse in “Call Me Rusty”.  It’s a minor key, the music always suggests concern, worry, lack of confidence, so to use it for this scene felt off.  The standard score uses “Belle’s Song” at this point, as that melody is connected with the Freight and Dustin as well as Belle.

Dinah’s Disco is re-worked to be a reprise of “I Got Me” which works well in this context.  If “I Got Me” were moved from act 1 to replace “Girls’ Rolling Stock”, following “UNCOUPLED”, this reprise would work perfectly.  Electra calls CB to his side with the “AC/DC” melody, the 7/4 time makes the short scene feel a bit awkward, but replacing the “Nobody Can Do It Like a Steam Train” melody makes sense when all references to “He Whistled At Me” have been cut.  Electra and CB bargain for the price of CB’s help.

Control introduces the re-run of the Final Race, on the Downhill course.  Again the score being used is snipped from the 2003 US Tour - the pre-race 4 has two versions, the original staging called for three finalists, the Broadway and later used four finalists.  The beautiful, complex layered music was originally written for the six racers, then altered for eight.  But then the US Tour version cut it back to six, rather than referring to the original score, the two vocal lines are simply left out leaving a gap in the music.  Specifically the 1992 score had Bobo singing “Le jour du gloire est arrivé” (please pardon my french!) with Ashley singing “Gonna be hot, hotter than hot”.  The alternative for that vocal part has Caboose singing “Just for me, I’m in this just for me” (or “Nur fuer Mich” in the German score) - but the workshop uses the Tour version which simply skips this vocal line. Once part that point the complex harmonies were gorgeously performed.  While I love the “Rusty’s gonna race in the Final” moment in this number, it harks back so strongly to the original version of the Rap.  

The Downhill Final was performed with a very witty side-comment from Control about “Sorry about the lights, use your imagination!”  The race music was very much the 1984 original which was gorgeous! Control’s narration tells us the story, including Pearl being disconnected, and Rusty saves her - at which point the Crazy melody was incorporated in the race music, with the ensemble singing “Come on Rusty”.   Immediately on winning, Rusty leaves with “I must find Pearl”, as usual.  

One Rock’n’Roll Too Many was staged almost exactly as usual - in fact all that was missing was the kneepads!  Contextually this was played the same as UK Tour / Germany, not like the 1992 London, which seems a shame.  The only major difference (apart from the presence of Caboose) is that in London, the ensemble stayed onstage and witnessed the massive fall from grace of the major players in the game.  I appreciate that practically, in staging the show, I am sure the ensemble are grateful for a couple of minutes backstage, but the story telling of including them as witnesses is important.  Plus it gives the ensemble characters more time to establish their personalities.  There’s no logical reason all the characters leave before the number, and come back at the end.  Momma was struggling with the vocal range for the “Where’s Rusty gone?” section.

Pearl is introduced with the electric guitar playing the “He Whistled At Me” melody, but since neither version of her song appeared at the start of the show, her reprise that was the introduction to “I Do” has been cut.  Which is super frustrating, because that little reprise was the only good addition with this dreadful song!  

“I Do” is untouched, it’s still abysmal, with clunky, random, meaningless lyrics, poor melodic construction, long and repetitive.  The lyrics scan very poorly to the music (“you think that noboDY would love you”), and the vocal ranges are very hard to sing, it’s fortunate the cast are so strong!  They are genuinely adorable and you’re so happy that they’ve found each other, despite the music.

I have to admit, however, that with the changes to Pearl’s character, that she is given more time to think, the lyrics are not as contradictory as previously.  It feels like Pearl, and to an extent Rusty, have been ret-conned to fit this song!

I am genuinely astonished that this song has been kept, I thought the one thing this workshop would be sure to give us was an improvement on the love song.  It’s such a shame to have lost “Only He” - in any of its many variations - as the love song being a reprise of one half of the Starlight Sequence is an enormously important part of the story telling.  The “Only You” melody speaks of discovery, completion, it’s the answer to the question, where the “Starlight Express” melody is the question.  

Following “I Do”, Rusty and Pearl sing a reprise of “I Got Me”, and the “Well Done Rusty, King of the Track” is now set to the same melody, which is slowed, and jars with the dissonance.  Then the reprise of the “Starlight Express” melody is as you’d expect, into Dinah’s “Greaseball you’re hurt!”  - beautifully performed, and there isn’t the jarring sense of “No, honey, don’t go back to your abusive ex!” - which is possibly more of a negative statement since Dinah’s character is so inconsistent.  Oliver Tompsett does have the most magnificent puppy-eyes pleading expression though, making it hard to resist forgiving his character!

Leading into Light at the end of the Tunnel, Mica Paris was again having difficulty singing the role written for a baritone! I had a moment of cognitive dissonance, given how there had been strong throw-backs to the 1984 version of the show, for the one line that was originally sung by Soul Queen PP Arnold as Belle, “The man who watched the pot and said, hey I got…”  - for one moment being sung by Soul Queen Mica Paris!  The final number bounced along, full of joy and energy as ever, with no changes from the norm.  No megamix, just a play-out from the fantastic band.  

[canaryatlaw]

Well, today was....interesting. Not the greatest, but okay. If you were on this morning you know that predictably when my alarm went off at 7:30 I was like hahaha no even though I was trying really hard to tell myself to get up I just can't fight some things, and now I'm not sure if it would've been better if I did or not, but oh well. Alarm went off again at 9, and this time I did get up and get ready for church, bus to train and got there right on time. I was signed up for the nursery for the 11 o clock service, and I knew I was the only person signed up at this point so it was going to be interesting to say the least. They're good with not leaving people alone though (I'm usually the person insuring someone else isn't alone, which is what happened for the 12:30 service) so one of the other girls who's over the babies program (somewhere higher up than me) came as well and it was fine. Unfortunately, sometimes when you have a lot of babies, some of whom are not very happy about being separated from their parents, every so often you're just gonna have a really rotten day when they won't stop crying and you want to scream. This has happened plenty of times before and while it's really annoying I can handle it, except today it was two services in a row and by the end I was not happy, lol. In the 11 there were two babies we had to call the parents of, the first we really tried to get to stop but he was just crying from the start and refused to give in, and the second being this really adorable 7 month old that's been in before but hasn't made it through successfully yet, and she was crying at first after her dad left but then I got her to stop and she was just chilling and being happy and was so cute, then out of nowhere she starts crying again, and it's like the baby shrieking their heads off and turning red and the really bad crying. We couldn't get her to stop, so we had to call her mom too. The others were mostly ok, a few small incidents but they were managed. For the 12:30 I knew there was still one person signed up, and was prepared to stay if I had to but I also knew sometimes people randomly show up so I might not have to, but nobody did so I had too lol. Unfortunately the tv we have in the room with the feed to the service was down this week, so I didn't get to see any of the service at all which made me sad, I would've liked to have gone (which is why I should've woken up earlier). So the 12:30 starts, again we have a baby right from the start that is just not having it at all, and we try for like a solid 20-30 minutes to try and get him to stop but he is like baby laser focused on getting out of here and refused to do anything but scream and crawl to the gate, so that was kind of inevitable. Then there was this 4 month that was again fine at first for a good amount of time, and then lost it out of nowhere and I couldn't get her to stop, then the other girl (the one from the first service who was running in and out between classes) got her to stop by rocking her and singing softly, then she hands her back to me and she starts crying again, which really irritates me because I always feel like a crappy child carer when someone else gets a kid to stop crying when I couldn't. But she's not having it, until on a whim I put her down in the crib in the corner of the room and she kind of hesitatingly stops crying but then looks like she's going to cry again but I just stroke her belly and start singing to her softly and she stops and just lays there, and that happens multiple more times and at this point at least I felt good about my ability to keep her from crying, lol. The singing though became interesting, because at first the only Christian kids song I could think of was "Jesus loves me" (I didn't have to only sing Christian songs, but I thought it'd be nice) but I didn't want to just sing that on repeat forever so I'm like wracking my brain trying to think of songs from my childhood, and I remember one with a ton of different verses, the first of which is like "I've got the joy joy joy joy down in my heart" and the last is "I've got the wonderful love of my blessed redeemer way down in the depths of my heart" and they're both sung in the same timing, lol. I vaguely recall there being a song about Zacchaeus and I'm trying to remember it (Zacchaues is from a short little story in the bible where there was this guy named Zacchaues and he's really short, and Jesus is coming through town and he wants to see him, so he climbs up a tree to see him and Jesus is like "dude, why are you in a tree? Come on, let's go party at your house" [no really that's basically what happens] and apparently someone decided that would be good material for a children's song) (this has been bible lessons with Rachel) and I'm like oh, it's like something something something and Zacchaues was his name-o! Then I was like no that's bingo you dumbass 😂 and I did eventually remember the song (which, if you're interested, goes "Zacchaues was a wee little man and wee little man was he") and so I rotate between the three and any others I can think of, and it works for a while.....until she just starts shrieking her head off again and is totally inconsolable and we had to call her mom too and I was like ready to bang my head against the wall because I felt so useless lol. Her mom did say she'd been like randomly crying all week and she was taking her to the doctor tomorrow though so that did make me feel a bit better). Then literally right as she leaves another one of the babies starts screaming when he was totally fine this whole time, and he's totally inconsolable and we have to call his mom, and at this point I REALLY wanted to bang my head against the wall repeatedly. At this point we had like, 2 babies left, one of whom had been sleeping in hid car seat this whole time and we're like praying he stays asleep and the other kid doesn't start crying (he did a bit, but it wasn't bad) and the little one wakes up like right as parents were coming, and he just lays there looking up at us like who the hell are you people, since it was his first time so he literally just woke up surrounded by people he's never seen before, but thankfully he just chilled and didn't cry, and his parents came like two minutes later. And yeah, that was my nursery. Needless to say I was exhausted by the end, and that kind of countered my thought that I should've woken up earlier to go to the service because I knew if I did that I would probably be REALLY exhausted by then). Train to bus and home, get some food and dive into my trial ad reading pretty immediately because they assigned like 200 pages or something ridiculous like that, I worked until about 8 and got like 125 pages done so that's a decent dent at least, and I have tomorrow to do the rest, the problems for that class, and hopefully my crim pro reading. Upon it turning 8 I retired for the night and turned on daredevil, which I finished the second season of again this time. It definitely made more sense being that I was paying much better attention this time around haha. There really are just so many great characters on that show though, like I love everything Karen, Foggy, and Claire says, and then I also love Electra because she's just so unbelievably badass I can't help but love her. The ending is of course sad, though with the very last scene being what it is I'm sure we haven't really seen the last of her, though who knows in what form she'll come back in (they may take some similar actions to DCTV there). The thing that makes me sad though is Matt like, essentially gives up on being a lawyer by the end of the season and 2016 WAS A REALLY BAD YEAR FOR MY LAWYER SUPERHEROES DAMMIT and I just have a lot of feelings because I'm on my way to being a lawyer and I love having superhero characters in my chosen profession, okay? Not that I've given up hope that Laurel is really coming back to us somehow, but still, 2016 was pretty shitty to them. Sigh. Other than that I did some other shit I needed to accomplish and little stuff like that until my computer died, being that my charger replacement won't arrive until tomorrow (I'm hoping I can borrow my roommate's for a bit tomorrow to get my assignments done, and if not there's always a notebook and a pen). So at least I was productive, even if my definition of productive means making it through all the tumblrs I check daily and putting like 25 captain canary fics into my "marked for later" because I've once again successfully cleaned out my inbox thanks to my recent reading them during transportation, so hopefully I can keep up with that. And yeah, that's about it. It's like 2:20 here already, and I'm glad I can sleep in tomorrow but I still think I should get to sleep now, so I'm going to do so. Goodnight loves. Sleep well.

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Well, it’s been a few days since Donald Trump introduced a new word into the English language. This new word has been frequently used since Trump utilized it in a cryptic Twitter message. There are just a couple of problems with the word. Nobody knows what it means. Heck, we’re not even sure if it’s English. Let’s not forget the ongoing debate over the proper pronunciation. In case you are unfamiliar with this new buzzword, it is “covfefe”. Trump tweeted “Despite the constant negative press covfefe” in the early hours of May 30th and the internet has gone bananas trying to make sense of it. What did he mean? It has been speculated that it is a simple typo. Did he mean to type “coverage”? If so, he kind of leaves the Twitterverse hanging with such a sentence fragment. Maybe he just passed out face-first into his keyboard and pressed random letters with his nose as he slept. Hillary Clinton told a crowd that the word could have been a hidden message to the Russians. Trump finally deleted the tweet several hours later but the fire was lit. He poured a bit of gas on said fire when he later tweeted “Who can figure out the true meaning of ‘covfefe’???? Enjoy!” Naturally, such an event is bound to bring out some interesting comments. Here are the 15 most savage celeb responses to Trump’s #covfefe.

#1 Kal Penn Kal Penn is an actor known for his roles in the Harold and Kumar film series. He temporarily gave up his acting career to take a job within the Obama Administration. He left his post as an Associate Director of the White House Office of Public Engagement a couple of times to resume his acting career. He was subsequently appointed to the President’s Committee on the Arts and Humanities. Penn was a staunch supporter of Bernie Sanders in the 2016 Democratic nomination and his backing of the Democrats is a given. It should go without saying that Penn took advantage of an opportunity to chime in on the “covfefe” flap. Penn tweeted “I like that we all quickly Googled covfefe just to make sure”. He is probably right. It has been one of the most popular trending searches in the past couple of days.

#2 James Corden The English comedian and host of The Late Night Show with James Corden has enjoyed a successful career in television, theater, and movies. Corden tends to stay relatively silent when it comes to his political views. This seems to make sense when we consider that he is from another country and doesn’t particularly want to offend anyone or divide his audience. Still, he is known to hold liberal views which occasionally shine through. Like many other late night hosts of the past and present, Corden doesn’t shy away from taking his digs at the president. After all, the current president is like the golden goose to comedians. Corden seems to think that covfefe is a state of mind. A mood. In a cryptic tweet of his own, Corden made use of the new buzzword by saying “I’m gonna try to go back to sleep now. Everyone stay covfefe.”

#3 Colton Haynes Those who are familiar with this actor, singer, and model likely discovered him through his part in the television series Teen Wolf or for his role in Arrow. Either way, Colton’s star appears to be on the rise. It’s alright for Haynes to cast a few stones as he has had plenty hurled at him. As a gay male, it also makes a bit of sense that he would cast a few stones Donald Trump’s way if the right opportunity presented itself. Well, enter covfefe-gate and the 28-year-old Twitter user just couldn’t resist posting his thoughts. He wrote “Covfefe…sashay away” indicating that Covfefe actually sounds like the name of a contestant that would appear on RuPaul’s Drag Race. Colton’s inference has as much credibility as any other theory at this stage.

#4 Billy Eichner Eichner is a 38-year-old writer, actor, and comedian that has been in American Horror Story, Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, and Parks and Recreation. He has also been hosting his own show Billy on the Streets which garnered a nomination for a Daytime Emmy Award for Outstanding Game Show Host. The guy is seriously funny. While Billy does occasionally delve into politics on his show, he does it in a far more subtle way than some of his contemporaries. The thing is that when it comes to Donald Trump, one really doesn’t need to have a political leaning in order to get a laugh at his expense. Billy seems to think that covfefe could possibly be a verb after he responded to Trump’s tweet with “When they go low, we covfefe”. Everyone covfefe!!

#5 Zachary Levi Zachary Levi is yet another actor with a sharp sense of humor. He has also entered the music world with his voice being heard in a few popular songs. He won the Best Action Actor at the Teen Choice Awards and was ranked by Buddy TV as one of “TV’s Sexiest Men of 2011”. Zachary, unlike many on this list, isn’t very vocal when it comes to American politics but, like everyone on this list, he won’t pass up the chance to pile on the heap. Zachary actually defined covfefe when he tweeted, “Covfefe: to covet another’s fefe”. That is quite helpful but it still leaves the majority of us wondering what a “fefe” is? Is it anything like “Thou shalt not covet another man’s wife”? That sort of makes sense in the context in which Trump used it. Does it not?

#6 Zach Braff It has been said that there are a few people in The Don’s inner circle that know exactly what “covfefe’ means. Still, that leaves everyone else in the dark. It also might mean that Zach Braff is in Donald Trump’s close circle. Braff, who is perhaps best remembered for his role as J.D. in the television comedy Scrubs took to Twitter with his own response to Trump’s tweet. The known Democrat supporter commented, “Not only is covfefe a word, it’s the greatest word ever uttered.” Does he really know something that the rest of us don’t? Has a known Democrat infiltrated Donald Trump’s inner circle? There aren’t too many other explanations. Maybe Bill Nye offered Zach some insight into the matter when Braff appeared in an episode of Bill Nye Saves the World recently.

#7 Jimmy Kimmel Jimmy Kimmel has been making people laugh even before he started in show business back in 1989. The 49-year-old host of Jimmy Kimmel Live! has appeared in a few films and some television shows throughout his rise to stardom. He has generally kept his personal political views out of his arena but he strayed from that pattern recently when he delivered a heart-wrenching plea to politicians of all stripes during his opening monolog. He urged politicians to work together on health-care reform. Kimmel’s own son was born with heart problems so the matter touches close to home for Kimmel. He also took the time to respond to Trump’s tweet by saying, “what makes me saddest is that I know I’ll never write anything funnier than covfefe”. We’ve got faith in you Jimmy!!

#8 Marina Diamandis This beautiful and talented Welsh singer hit the pop charts in 2010 with the song “Hollywood” from her debut album The Family Jewels. She has since kept in the public eye with follow-up albums Electra Heart and Froot which have also landed in the top-ten and yielded hit singles. Diamandis is considered somewhat of an icon in the gay community. She headlined at NYC Pride following the tragic Pulse nightclub shooting. Is there is a possibility that Marina is a left-leaning member of the secret Trump inner circle? One helpful clue comes from her Twitter response to Trump’s mystery tweet. “How is Covfefe pronounced though?” the songstress asks. What? While the pronunciation is certainly an issue, the larger issue lies with the word’s definition. Maybe she’s in cahoots with Zach Braff?

#9 Matt Shively Matt Shively has played in several minor movie roles as well as a couple bigger parts such as playing one of the leads in Paranormal Activity 4. The 26-year-old has also had a recurring role in the television show Jessie and Resident Advisors. Shively’s response to Trump’s tweet was very well-timed and actually gets a shot in at another recent newsmaker. Kathy Griffin was recently fired from CNN for posting a video in which she was holding a bloody fake severed head that looked an awful lot like Donald Trump’s head. Matt took to Twitter after Trump’s tweet and asked, “Has no one thought that maybe Kathy Griffin ACTUALLY cut off Donald Trump’s head mid-tweet?” Excellent question Matt. Donald’s neck is about big enough to reach all those letters on the keyboard.

#10 Ariel Winter This pretty 19-year-old rising star has been doing movies and television since she was about 7 years old. She was showing her budding talent in commercials by the age of four and she has done a lot of character voices too. She claims to have had a physically and mentally abusive upbringing and she was officially emancipated in 2015. In an age that sees many actresses enhance their image by getting breast enlargements, Ariel went the other way and had hers surgically reduced 2 years ago. One way in which she seems to have gone with the mainstream is on her Twitter page. She got her dig at Donald Trump in by responding to his tweet with a simple, yet well-thought-out “Make America #covfefe again” referring to one of Trump’s famous campaign slogans. Zing!

#11 Jerry O’Connell He’s only 43 but Jerry O’Connell has been a fixture on the big screen and in television for 30 years. He got his start at the age of 12 as Vern Tessio in Stephen King’s Stand by Me. He has gone on to act in countless television roles as well as popular movies like Jerry Maguire, Scream 2, and a few Justice League films. He is married to the beautiful Rebecca Romijn and has two children. In between his acting gigs, Jerry likes to find the time to stay active on Twitter. Needless to say, the Trump tweet got Jerry’s attention and he showed off his funny side with a few responses. He begins with “Just dropped kids off at school and greeted every parent with ‘covfefe”. He then tweeted “Don’t even care if everyone knows… Just changed all my passwords to #covfefe”.

#12 Lisa Rinna Lisa Rinna is known for her several roles in television and film. She got her first big role as Jason Bateman’s girlfriend in the television series The Hogan Family before landing a gig on Days of Our Lives. She’s posed for Playboy and recently became one of the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. She’s been seen almost everywhere including the plastic surgeon’s office. She also manages to maintain a presence on Twitter. Judging by her page, Lisa likes to share her life on a daily basis so it shouldn’t come as a surprise to learn that she got her two cents in with respect to the whole covfefe kerfuffle. In her hilarious meme, Lisa is seated at a table engaged in a conversation over a glass of wine when she asks her friend, “Were people doing covfefe in your bathroom?” This gives us a whole new meaning to the word.

#13 Christie Brinkley Many of us know her as the gorgeous blonde in the red Ferrari that teased Clark Griswold in the 1983 film National Lampoon’s Vacation. Of course, she was already a star by then through her very successful modelling career which saw her grace over 500 magazine covers like Cosmopolitan, Glamour, and the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue. Brinkley is a huge supporter of the Democratic Party and has donated a boatload of cash. She is also quite concerned about global warming as we can see by checking out her Twitter page. She chose to get a little more serious than others on this list when she responded to the Trump tweet with “Covfefe: French word for the overheated convection oven effect on Earth (that)Trump is creating by pulling out of the Paris Climate agreement”. This is definitely one of the 15 most savage celebrity responses to Trump’s #Covfefe.

#14 Diana Falzone Diana Falzone is a charming and stunning brunette reporter for FoxNews. At least she was with FoxNews. As of May 2017, she was suspended from duty and told to find another job after she filed a lawsuit against the company for gender and disability discrimination. Ouch. Her lawyers claim that the brass at Fox considered her less sexually appealing and less desirable after she wrote an article on the Fox News website that stated she was infertile due to a medical condition. One of the Fox News Co-Presidents, who was named in the suit, resigned in the wake of the filing. She seems to have kept a sense of humor throughout this stressful period as she took to Twitter to post “The best part of waking up is covfefe in your cup. I apologize in advance.” No need to apologize Diana.

#15 Violette Shumberg We’re not exactly sure if Twitter user Violette Shumberg is a Hollywood celebrity but she is a bit of a celebrity on Twitter now. Violet Shumberg was simply an Agnes Moorehead character from the 1942 movie The Big Street. The Twitter page shows that it is operated by @lisaloopners. Lisa Loopner was a character played by Gilda Radner back when Saturday Night Live was funny. Her response to Donald Trump’s tweet makes reference to an old Hollywood film. In the Bette Davis movie Now, Voyager, Davis’ character says the line “Oh, Jerry, don’t let’s ask for the moon! We have the stars.” Shumberg has cleverly attached a photo that depicts that scene with the caption “Oh, Jerry, don’t let’s ask for the moon. We have Covfefe.” Who is Violette Shumberg?

Source: TheRichest