#when matt started crying i completely lost it
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ilanarose7 · 9 months ago
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Some outcomes of Critical Role episode 91 (that happened either because of or completely separate from the big thing)
SPOILERS!!!! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!!
Starting with the ones not due to FCG's sacrifice:
Liliana has some level of trust and attempts at redemption with her daughter (those 31's on deception and persuasion Laura you legend!), which means a major player (and VESSEL?? tf was that about) who was formerly (and maybe kind of still) on Ludinus's side is swapping over
Ashton and Fearne are about to be exhausted from being Titans (Ashton much sooner since they powered up in ep. 90)
Zathuda is both proud and angry towards Fearne which is both terrifying and a bit heartwarming(?)
Nana (I think/hope it was her bending fate) was able to help Team Infiltration escape the Weavemind after Orym reached out
Now for the other outcomes due to FCG's sacrifice:
Orym's deal with Nana should be void since the group cannot return as they were (VM Spoiler Note: Liam's PC was finally saved from a deal leading to a life of service by Sam's PC after he wasn't able to in C1)
Chetney is ALIVE! I'm counting this as part of the sacrifice bc due to weird leveling circumstances Sam sacrificed his one brand-new 7th-level spell slot to take Revivify, which is a major thing to give up
Otohan is DEAD! GONE! That is a MAJOR player off the board and another one of Ludinus's high-ranking members off the board
FCG is dead, seemingly unrevivable based on how Matt phrased it (asking to make sure Sam understood what it meant). That will have MAJOR implications going forward.
On a D&D technical level, there is no primary healer meaning that Fearne has to take some healing spells or the party can't heal at all (pretty sure they used up all their potions during that fight).
On a character level, this is going to be devastating. Ashton, who started this whole adventure with FCG and has been saying for a LONG time that FCG was going to get themself killed, was unconscious when FCG made the ultimate sacrifice. Sending works, which means when they get back to Exandria, Imogen will probably be the one to let FRIDA know what happened.
On a slightly lighter note, I feel like Travis is going to shine next week. It's been said before and I'll say it again, Chetney is the heart of Bells Hells. He knows how to be there for this family and I have a feeling that will come to the forefront as we see the aftermath
I'm sure there are more outcomes, but these are the ones on my mind after barely sleeping last night following that episode. Sam knows how to play this game well and cuts straight to the heart while doing so. It was masterfully played and while completely devastating to watch, was also incredibly heroic and beautiful.
Good game, great players, amazing DM, and of course thank you Fresh Cut Grass for being a Faithful Care-Giver until the end
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farfromstrange · 2 months ago
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Fictober Day 17: Face-sitting
Fictober Masterlist | Main Masterlist
Pairing: Matt Murdock x F!Reader
Prompt: Face-sitting (✨)
Summary: Face-sitting. That's it.
Warnings: SMUT (18+), oral f!receiving, face-sitting, face-riding, dirty talk
Word Count: 846
A/n: I know I did a fic like this for another prompt, but I do kind of love this prompt.
Read Me On AO3! (Coming soon)
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His fingers dig into your hips, nails leaving crescent moon indentations in your tender flesh as you move your cunt against his tongue. 
“Sit,” he’d said and spread your legs over his head. “Ride my face until you come. Please, use me.” 
He needed to lose control. He’d had such a rough week at work and needed to just let go. When he said use me, he meant it. He meant for you to take what you need until he can’t breathe, and then some more. He needed you. 
You have a tight grip on his hair, more than eager to comply with his request. Ride my face until you come. On his tongue is your favorite place to be, after all. 
You chase the heat in your belly with abandon, wanting moans tumbling from your parted lips like an orchestra of pure and unbridled pleasure. His tongue has nowhere to go but through your folds, right where you want him to be, around your clit and inside of you. 
Your walls engulf him as he tastes you from the inside out. Goosebumps erupt on your skin; he traces his fingers over them, gently, reverently, and he hums in approval at the way your walls clench around him.
He holds you, he explores you, and you are so fucking close you might lose your battle with self-control any moment now. Matt can barely breathe with how tightly you’re holding his face against your perfect pussy, but he would gladly suffocate in this position. There is no place he would rather die than drowning in your cum, where the only sound audible to his sensitive ears is the rushing of your blood through the veins in your thighs.
Your scent in his nose, your taste on his tongue—you’re all over him. He may be drinking from you like you are the elixir of life, but you are the one consuming him. You are the one who makes the noise of the world disappear. And when you finally become the death of him, lost in pleasure like this, his headstone will read that he died doing what he loved: eating out the woman he loved as though she were his last meal.
“Touch me,” you plead. 
Matt slides his hand from your hip to your breast. Your nipples are already hard and aching for him to touch, and he greedily starts to play with those sensitive bundles of nerves he likes to wrap his lips around. Your body is his playground, his to love, and his to command. You are completely at his mercy even when he is not in control because you crave him like a dangerous drug. 
You need to inject him into your bloodstream.
“That’s it,” your moan echoes across the room. “That’s it, don’t stop.”
Your hips start to move faster, more desperately against his tongue. He flattens it against your folds, circling your clit whenever he gets the chance. Air has started to become a luxury, his face slick with the wetness pooling out of you, but he would be damned if he tapped out now. 
Time has stopped; only God knows how long he has been waiting for this—craving this.
Before long, the tight coil in your belly snaps, filling you with a warmth that goes straight to your head, and then you’re coming. You lose control of your limbs, falling forward into the mattress as you cry out his name into the void. 
Your pussy keeps dragging along his tongue to chase those electric shocks of pleasure, the feeling that curls around your core like a noose. You are so addicted to that feeling that you drive yourself into overstimulation, his beard burning marks into your thighs. You know you will be sore for days, but oh, it was fucking worth it.
Below you, Matt is groaning and moaning, drinking up every last drop of you until you have nothing left to give. His balls tighten, his cock twitches; Matt buries his teeth in the soft flesh of the inside of your thigh, muffling himself as he spills into his black boxers. You exploded like a bomb in his mouth. He couldn’t hold it back anymore, he had to come. 
It’s pathetic, he thinks, coming untouched like a teenager who never had sex before, but he had to come for you.
He had to come with you.
Matt is incredibly sensitive to what you’re feeling as though he lives inside you, and so for just a little while, he turns into a horny teenager who comes in his underwear. 
You roll off, falling to the mattress beside him. “Holy fuck,” you choke out. 
The words refuse to form. He takes a deep breath. When he exhales again after a few seconds of floating in a boneless bubble, all the tension falls from his shoulders. For the first time in days, Matt is at peace.
“You okay?” your voice reaches through to him. 
He nods, lips curling into a smile. “Yeah,” he says. “I’m okay.”
And it is all because of you. 
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vanteguccir · 10 months ago
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── ୨୧ ! 𝗟𝗢𝗡𝗚 𝗟𝗜𝗩𝗘
        𝒎𝒂𝒕𝒕 𝒔𝒕𝒖𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒐𝒍𝒐 x reader
SUMMARY: Where the Cut The Camera Podcast comes to an end and Matt feels emotional about it, but Y/N is there to comfort him.
WARNING: Sad talk, crying.
REQUESTED?: Yes, by anon.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: That is my work, I DON'T authorize any plagiarism! | English isn't my first language, so I'm sorry if there's any grammar error.
   ༻✦༺  ༻✧༺ ༻✦༺
The time had come to say goodbye to the Cut The Camera Podcast.
If Y/N said her eyes weren't filled with trapped tears that she was fighting so hard not to spill, she would be lying.
The girl was sitting on the floor on one of the fluffy pink cushion that decorated the Podcast studio, her back was pressed against the door next to the stairs as she silently listened to what the boys were saying, looking up to them from time to time.
That was a habit she had created months before, practically since the beginning of the Podcast, where she would simply enter the studio with the boys and accompany their filming while sitting in the same exact place on the floor with her phone in hand, not being seen by any camera, nor heard by any of the high-resolution microphones.
It was always a different adventure to be there. If her mood was down, the boys' jokes made her laugh until her stomach hurt. Sometimes, she herself attributed a different fact to one of the topics that Nick brought up or gave them an idea when creativity ran out before they reached the one hour mark.
She lost count of how many times she turned on the air conditioning when Nick felt too hot or brought Matt and Chris a hoodie when they were too cold. Many times having left the studio quickly to get water or some drinks from the kitchen for one of the three when noticing their voices hoarse from thirst and the amount of minutes spent talking without a pause.
With all this being said, the brothers could say that she actively participated in the podcast and its environment without necessarily appearing in it.
So, it was no surprise that in that episode she was without her phone in hand, sitting in her usual spot, with her head practically completely covered by the hood of her hoodie and a sad look resting on her face.
Her eyes traveled between the triplets at all times, ready to jump in and console them if she noticed any tears appearing, knowing how difficult it was to finish that cycle - despite also knowing how necessary it was for their growth.
The recording was coming to an end, and Y/N felt her chest heavy, even though she was extremely happy and looking forward to the three's new individual and group projects.
Part of her scolded herself for being so emotional, maybe because she didn't feel she had the right to, since she wasn't even part of the channel. Or maybe because the boys seemed perfectly fine and happy with its ending, but she knew they were just resigned to it.
"It feels like just yesterday we started it." Chris began the ending, turning his face to Nick while playing with his microphone with his right hand. "I actually can't believe how long we've been doing this. I'm happy it's over, but I'm happy it happened."
"Oh my God... I'm happy it's over, but I'm happy it happened." Nick repeated, focusing his eyes on the ceiling for a few seconds, and Y/N was almost sure he was holding back his tears.
"That was good, right?" Chris chuckled, crossing his arms on the table and tilting his head.
"I did like it." The oldest of the triplets nodded, a thoughtful look resting on his face. "But, before we continue ending it, I think we should call a special person, who is as much a part of this podcast as we are." He brought his lips closer to his microphone, his eyes quickly meeting Y/N's. "Come here."
The girl took a deep breath, getting up from the floor and patting her pants lightly, uncreasing the slightly wrinkled fabric from her previous position.
Matt turned his head in her direction, looking at her with an almost imperceptible smile on his lips. He opened his arms, silently asking her to sit next to him, and she did.
Y/N settled down on the white and pink vintage couch, resting her back against the backrest and crossing her legs on the upholstery. Her left hand automatically found home on Matt's right thigh, stroking the covered skin lightly.
"All these months of Cut The Camera, Y/N has been with us. She literally sits on the floor, leaning against the door, right there..." Chris began, pointing his index finger towards the door, even though the camera couldn't reach the indicated space. "And listen to an hour and a few minutes of us talking about literally everything."
"She gave us ideas during some podcasts, complemented some topics with new information... In other words, she technically participated without appearing." Nick agreed with his brother, raising his index and middle fingers at each item mentioned.
"Yeah... Well, hi guys!" The girl glued her upper body against Matt's, bringing her face closer to the microphone, offering a small smile to the camera that looked back at her. "I'm sorry about my condition-"
"She was crying, I can tell." Nick interrupted her loudly, raising his right hand for a few seconds before lowering it again, receiving an eye roll from the girl in response.
"It's just..." Y/N closed her eyes momentarily, taking a deep breath before opening them again. "It's incredible to see it from my perspective. I've been in the boys' lives for a little more than 7 years, I've been accompanying them since before the Sturniolo Triplets channel began, especially since before Cut The Camera Podcast. I saw this dream born in their hearts more than two years ago..." She swallowed hard, feeling her eyes sting with new tears while clearing her throat slightly.
Matt moved his right hand up to her back, lightly caressing the covered skin before wrapping it around her waist firmly, pulling the microphone in his direction, giving her time to compose herself.
"It's true guys, she helped us build this whole studio, design it, decorate it... She had most of the ideas with Nick." The brunette pointed his head at his brother, who was watching him with his lips pressed together, nodding. "And she kept us company through the whole process."
Y/N sighed, lightly squeezing the skin of Matt's thigh still under her fingers, reassuring him that she was okay.
"Yes, exactly. But despite all that, I have no right to come and cry rivers and say words as if the world is ending. I mean, I'm not even in the channel." She let out a nasal laugh, shaking her head and fixing her eyes on the table, frowning before starting to talk again. "But I just wanted to say you guys did a great fucking job."
Her eyes lifted from the white wooden surface, traveling over Nick, who had his lips pressed into a thin line, looking at her with soft, attentive eyes; Chris, who was arranging his pink cap on his head in an act of nervousness, keeping his head low; and finally Matt, who had his eyes fixed on his own lap, without letting her see his face completely, but she knew he was listening to her words carefully.
"I'm sure that, like the Sturniolo Triplets channel, this podcast was a safe place for many people, perhaps an escape from life's problems or a moment to relax. Although you..." She quickly pointed to Nick. "Having said that many episodes didn't get you three anywhere, I'm sure they were still as important as the others for some people."
The sound of sniffing caught her attention. Y/N turned her head quickly towards her boyfriend, who still had his head down. Her eyes soon caught the small tears running down his cheeks and dripping on his blue hoodie, leaving a wet trail behind, which shone below the bright light of the expensive illumination.
The girl adjusted her posture, pulling him carefully so that her arms circled around his shoulders, hugging him close to her body. She arranged the microphone so that the support held it directly to her without her having to let go of Matt.
"I'm proud of you, boys. I know why this podcast is coming to an end, and I completely understand, just as I know they will, too..." Y/N pointed to the camera in front of her with her chin, not taking her hands off her boy for even a moment. "I know about the future plans of each of you, I helped you with some ideas, just like I just supported others, and I'm sure that all of them will give incredible results in the near future, which the entire fandom will be able to enjoy as much as they enjoy the current projects." She finished, her voice sounding weak.
She caught her bottom lip between her teeth, biting it hard in an attempt to hold back the sobs. Out of the four, Y/N was the most emotional, having been called a cry baby many times throughout her life since her crying came easily with any situation that made her heart sting.
Matt sighed, finally lifting his head and resting it against his girlfriend's one. Feeling comfort surrounded his body with Y/N's arms still securely wrapped around him, opening a small smile at the camera.
"I... I will be forever grateful for all these months, thanks to all of you." Chris's watery eyes searched Y/N's, receiving a nod in response, which gave him enough confidence to open a tearful smile.
"Goodbye campers, and good night." Nick finished slowly, as if he had been avoiding that moment during the entire 1 hour of recording. His fingers played with the support of his microphone nervously as his eyes traveled over his brothers and his best friend.
"Sleep tight. Don't let the bed bugs eat your feet." Matt brought his right cheek closer to Y/N's left one, murmuring into the microphone softly.
"Come here, lovie." Y/N whispered to Matt as soon as Nick did the small gesture he always did when they came to the end of recording.
Her arms - which were still around him - pulled him closer to her body, allowing him to lay his head on her left shoulder.
"I'm so proud of you." She sealed her lips over the brunette curls for long seconds, closing her eyes tightly as she felt his hoddie-covered shoulders tremble slightly under her grip, low sobbing sounds echoing through the pink walls.
Y/N swept her eyes around the studio, seeing Chris already standing and walking towards the stairs, his hands wiping away aggressively the thick tears that were flowing down his cheeks freely. Nick was still sitting, his arms resting on the table as he stared at the wooden surface intently, seeming to still process everything.
"It's okay, you did the right thing. Good things are coming."
     ༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺
extra - comments:
"how come we never noticed that Y/N was there in every podcast? 🤯🤯"
"omg this is so sad but so exciting at the same time, I'm looking forward to the new projects 😔"
"Y/N being the emotional support of the three of them was the cutest thing I saw today 😭😭"
"honestly, if we put together the tears of the four and all the fans who are crying right now, we could make the planet overflow 😫✋🏻"
"on no, matt crying made my heart sting so bad ;(("
"I love how Y/N is always there with them, giving the right support and being an amazing girlfriend and best friend, they're a real family 🥺🥺"
"Y/N spill some spoilers about the new projects, we beg you 😭😭"
"Y/N and Matt are so beautiful together, they're really made for each other 🥺"
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liked by cutthecamerapodcast, matthew.sturniolo and 808,823 others
yninstagram you will be remembered ♡
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mattsturnioloz · 29 days ago
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I found you again: Pt 3.
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Summary: Sequel of 'Then I lost you', A year after a devastating break up, Y/n finds herself reuniting with the love of her life, Matt Sturniolo, at a mutual friends birthday party. Will they rekindle their love?
Pairings: Y/n x Matt Sturniolo
Warnings: UTI, cussing,
A/N: (honestly i’ve been so lazy to work on this part but I gathered the motivation to write it since you guys love it so i hope you guys enjoy 💚)
I slump myself on the ground, still crying. The night air getting colder by the minute. I look up at Matt who’s taking deep breaths, trying to compose himself.
“Look Y/n, let’s get you home okay? You’re drunk, you’re not taking an uber and i’m not letting you stay here so come on, get up.” He says, calmer, a little bit of guilt in his tone. He takes a step forward holding his hand out but I don’t take it. I try to balance myself as I stand up and I stumble back to my original spot in the car, opening the door and getting in next to Chris again.
I buckle myself in, crossing my arms as Matt opens the drivers door and gets in. I wipe my tears when I look over and see Nancy staring at me with a smug look on her face and it pisses me off even more. “What the fuck are you looking at bitch?!” I spit out, aggressively, my voice still shaky from crying.
“HEY! ENOUGH!!” He yells, turning his whole body around to look at me with disbelief written all over his face as her jaw drops, smiling as she scoffs. I roll my eyes and look over at Chris and Nick who are waking up from all the yelling. “Matt, don’t fucking yell at her like that.” Chris slurs, sternly, his voice groggy from waking up.
“Chris go back to fucking sleep kid. You guys need to shut up and relax, i’m tired of it!” He replies, in the same stern tone. “Can you just drive?!” I yell. “Fine!” He starts the car and starts driving. Finally the car is moving.
A few minutes later Matt starts playing music to cover up the silence in the car and Chris looks over at me empathetically and he can see I was crying. “Are you okay?” He says putting his arm around my shoulder pulling me to his chest and I nod. Surprisingly he’s already starting to sound pretty sober, considering that I still feel like I JUST got drunk.
I fall asleep for what feels like a few minutes but I wake up when I feel the car coming to a complete stop, thinking I was home. I lift my head from Chris’s chest to see but we were just dropping his girlfriend off at her house first. She goes in for a kiss but he moves his face dodging it. Probably to make up for making out with her in front of me earlier. She scoffs and gets out slamming the door.
Matt sighs before starting the car, driving off again. A few minutes pass and I still feel empty, my chest feeling like there’s a big metal ball in it. “H-hey you passed my street!” I say leaning forward to talk to Matt. “You’re not staying home alone, Y/n. You’re drunk.” I know he was right so I don’t protest.
We get to the triplets house and I open the door, stumbling out and I fall. I feel dizzy when I look up and see the world spinning and everything feels lighter as I feel myself pass out.
I wake up in the middle of the night in Matt’s bed covered in blankets, the smell of fresh sheets and candles filling my nostrils. I take a look around and take in the familiar feeling of the room since it was once mine too. I felt a massive hangover coming from the slight headache that was starting to throb.
I get up and leave the room to get some water and pain killers from the kitchen and I see Matt at the couch. Feeling the need to talk to him, so I look for an excuse. “What time is it?” I ask him.
“3:47” He says not even looking at me. “Why are you still up?” I ask, I don’t even know why I did. “Why do you care?” He snaps, turning his gaze to the tv, watching gravity falls. He always loved that show, especially when we were together he would put it on almost every night before bed.
“There’s no need to get snappy, it was just a question.” I reply, with a frustrated tone and all he does is scoff. I roll my eyes and taking some pain killers and I feel hungry all of a sudden.
“Can we go to Mcdonald’s?” I ask, quietly. I’m surprised he even heard me. “It’s almost 4 am and you want Mcdonald’s?” He gives me a baffled look.
“I’m already feeling the hangover and i’m hungry.. please?” I put my hands together, pleading him. He lets out a sigh and gets up. “Fine, go get my keys.” He answers with an attitude. I don’t know what his issue is all of a sudden but it’s starting to get to me.
I go get his keys and hand them to him. “Can I borrow a sweater?” I ask, shivering a bit. “No.” He simply replies. “What’s your issue?” I almost yell. “Nothing, now do you want Mcdonald’s or what??” He raises his voice tilting his head with an annoyed expression.
“No, just take me home.” I reply, looking away. “Come on don’t be like that. I swear you’re so difficult Y/n.” He walks towards the front door opening it and waiting for me to follow so I do.
I leave the house, the cold air hitting me as soon as I do and I get whole body chills. We make our way to his car and I get in buckling myself in before crossing my arms, looking out the window.
He buckles in and pulls out of the driveway and I notice that he’s driving to Mcdonald’s. “What are you doing? I said I wanna go home.” I look at him waiting for a response. “I’ll get you home after we get Mcdonald’s, relax.” He sighs and looks back at the road.
The car goes silent the rest of the way before we go though the drive-thru and we get our food and park in the parking lot to eat. The only sounds being us eating our food.
“Thank you..” I give a slight smile. “You’re welcome.” He says with the same smug face. We finish eating and he starts driving to my place. It all felt so wrong. The silence was so fucking awkward, so quiet that I might go crazy.
We arrive at my place and I unlock the door to leave but before I could open it he locks it again. I look at him confused and when I look at him he opens his mouth before closing it, like he wants to say something. “What are you doing?” I ask, super confused.
“L-listen.. can we talk?” He says with a vulnerable expression but I honestly don’t even want to hear it. “There’s nothing to talk about Ma-“ He cuts me off all of a sudden and grabs my hand.
“I still love you, Y/n..” He says, looking at me dead in the eye. I freeze up and I feel myself start to shake. I’m so confused, was was just so rude to me and now he’s saying he loves me? no! He’s staring at me and I feel overwhelmed, not knowing what to say as I grow nauseas.
I open the door not saying anything and I get out closing the door a little too quick and I run inside my house slamming the door behind me. I slide down my front door after locking it and I feel my eyes fill with tears. I left him hanging. I shouldn’t have done that. I know I have to apologize. I just can’t right now.
1,286 words.
A/N: (I hate this so much, i’m so sorry for the delay guys, I haven’t been able to write at my full potential, it’s been a rough time for me but i have like 50 anons asking for this chapter so here you go 🫶🏼)
Taglist: @watercolorskyy @chrissfleshlight @realuvrrr @stonermattsgf @pvssychicken @venusbabysblog @kayla-hearts4sturniolo @endereies @starzinasblog @urfavstromboli @sturniqloo @star-yawnznn @h3arts4harry @asherrisrandom @tsturniolo4 @urmom69lol @luzsturniolo @ncm9696 @valkatriee @sturnslut1 @annielolz @sturnlover4eva @luzsturniolo @anyaa2s @sturnzpro @tpwktahlz @nataliesturn @openurbocaputitonmyballsbitch
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matthewswifeyx · 2 months ago
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One month <3
Requested?- yess! Here <3
Warnings?- Fluff
A/N: Guys this is my first try writing in third person, please tell me if its trash or not! 😅
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Y/N and Matt had finally welcomed their beautiful baby boy Conner into the world. He was home safe, sound and settled. Both of the new parents were enjoying their title. They felt extremely comfortable referring to each other as 'mommy' and 'daddy' when speaking with Conner and talking about themselves. The first month went by so quickly, Y/N and Matt had enjoyed every second of quality time they could have with their new addition. It did take them a while to get used to this new lifestyle.
"Matt you put the diaper on backwards!" Y/N chuckled.
"Hey, can you blame me? There are no instructions." Matt laughed with Y/N.
They had worked together and promised each other to talk things out if they are struggling. Y/N recently had been feeling the effects of postpartum depression, but her husband wasn't afraid to be at her side and support her in anyway shape or form.
"I don't why I am feeling so down, I am so happy that we finally can have a family but I just feel a little lost."
"Y/N it is completely okay to be feeling this way at this point in time, we can go to the doctor and get the support you need. We will get through this together. I promise." Matt kissed her lovingly to show that he does care. Y/N knew that he did.
A newborn in the house did result in sleepless nights, but Y/N and Matt did know what they signed up for.
The baby monitor released the sounds of crying from baby Conner in his nursery. It broke both of their hearts that he was in distress.
"I got it Matt don't worry."
Y/N hopped out of bed and went straight to the crying Conner to try and get him back to sleep. She picked him up from his crib and she tried breastfeeding, Y/N has always had trouble feeding Conner. Little did she know that Matt was watching and listening to the events over the baby monitor, he felt so upset for Y/N. He knew that she was devastated when she found that she would have troubles feeding her son.
"Why am I labelled a natural mom when I can't even feed my baby naturally." That comment replayed in Matt's mind. He didn't want Y/N to feel this way again, so he got out of bed and joined his wife in the nursery.
"You doing okay baby?"
"No i'm not. My body won't let me breastfeed." Tears start to sting the corners of Y/N's eyes.
"Baby, you're just tired. I got this one, i'm just going to get a pre made formula from the fridge, okay? Go back to bed and get some rest alright?"
"Okay." She murmurs.
"I love you Y/N." Matt says. Y/N doesn't say anything and walks out of the nursery back to the bedroom. Matt bounced Conner slightly up and down in his arms in a way to quieten him. Matt went over to the rocking chair and tried to see if skin to skin would make Conner fall back to sleep. Matt was already shirtless. Matt took Conner out of his onesie carefully and placed him on his chest.
"It's okay buddy, daddy's here." Matt hushed. He continued to craddle Conner on his chest for a few more minutes and after that Conner had fallen back into a peaceful sleep.
Conner was mostly a happy baby, so when he did cry during the day it didn't affect Y/N and Matt as much. Matt was such a good dad, he knew that the baby couldn't really respond at the moment. But he was being silly and fun with the baby. Matt would never put the baby in harms way. But he would scare Y/N a few times by throwing Conner up in the air slightly and catching him safely.
"God Matt! Don't do that, you scared me!" Y/N immediately took Conner from Matt's arms and held him close to her chest.
"Y/N, honey, I would never do anything to hurt Conner. It's just a bit of fun." Coincidentally Conner babbles quietly in a cute agreement. Both Matt and Y/N laughed at this interaction.
Every since Conner was born, Matt would be looking online for toys and games that they could play with together. Y/N knew that Conner was going to be Matt's best friend. Matt would order the biggest and coolest toys all over the internet. One day Matt would pick up an interactive dinosaur and the next day he would order a jellycat the same size and Y/N. Matt really cared for his child to feel safe and happy even if Conner couldn't appreciate it right now, but being a new father gave Matt a job to make sure both of those bullet points are ticked off the list straight away. Matt would start decorating the play room as soon as he had any free time, Matt had bought a comfortable small couch to put on the corner. he had bought a camouflage backdrop to put behind the sofa, he decided to theme the play room as a jungle. So Matt had bought loads of animal plushies and a teepee tent to put in the corner. Matt had purchased about a dozen of childrens books to read. Matt had also set up some fairy lights in the ceiling to really set the mood.
Y/N couldn't have been more proud and appreciative of Matt, he wanted his son to have the best childhood a father could offer.
Y/N and Matt really tried hard to make sure everything was prepared for Conner when he was able to play and walk and talk. They couldn't have been any better and supportive with one another.
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Hey guys! I hope you really enjoyed this fanfic! if you have any suggestions/requests please do not hesitate to send something for me to see and i will try and get back to you asap! <3
Banner credits to @bernardsbendystraws <3
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incendiobrock · 9 months ago
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Illicit Affairs {Chris Sturniolo}
Summary: fem!reader x chris imagine based on "Illicit Affairs" by Taylor Swift. (song lyrics are bolded and in red)
Warnings: ANGSTY ASF!!, language, mentions of sex
A/N: tried a little something different and i think it turned out really well hehehe + my requests are OPEN please send me some!!
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Make sure nobody sees you leave Hood over your head, keep your eyes down Tell your friends you're out for a run You'll be flushed when you return
The house was dead silent as you tip toed down the hallway. Sneaking around at the dead of night was a new occurrence for you. You had convinced your friends you weren't feeling well and needed to head home from the bar early.
Instead of going home you went to the house of the boy you had been sneaking around with for almost a month. His brothers, Matt and Nick, had been asleep for at least a couple hours before you even attempted to come over. Chris had met you through a mutual friend and you both decided that things should stay between you two, no need for the public eye.
The shirt that you had worn out to the bar was now discarded somewhere on Chris' bedroom floor. His hoodie now hung over your torso, taking place of your lost garment, as you slipped back out into the night sky.
It was a long walk back to your place but nothing that you hadn't walked before. It was easier this way, or so you tried to convince yourself.
Take the road less traveled by Tell yourself you can always stop What started in beautiful rooms Ends with meetings in parking lots
Your car sat idle in an empty parking lot. Your heart raced as you waited for some indication that Chris was nearby. The late night meetings at his place were becoming too risky, Nick had asked Chris about hearing doors open and shut in the middle of the night. The only place he felt comfortable meeting you was in the confines of your car in a desolate parking lot. Away from your roommates, and away from his brothers.
A small rapping on the window made you jump slightly, cueing you to let the boy inside. He took a seat in the passenger seat, immediately pulling you in for a deep kiss. Words weren't usually spoken between the two of you, all he really wanted was your body. And so you always ended up in the backseat together, clothes discarded on the floorboards, the windows of your car fogging up.
"Same time tomorrow?" He asked with a certain rasp in his voice that always had you swooning. These were the first words he had spoken the whole night, fixing his hair in the rearview mirror. You nodded your head, watching as he got out of the car and began walking back the direction he had initially come from.
And that's the thing about illicit affairs And clandestine meetings and stolen stares They show their truth one single time But they lie, and they lie, and they lie A million little times
After months of hiding away in the car, you were finally back in the bedroom that started it all. Tears were flowing down your cheeks as Chris stood across the room, his hand over his eyes in annoyance.
“I can’t keep doing this Chris…” Your voice was weak from crying, the squeakiness made you cringe as Chris scoffed at your words.
“Can’t keep doing what y/n? You were the one who wanted this!” He said, raising his voice. The volume he was speaking in made you tremble, completely pulling you apart into a weeping mess.
“You’re leading me on Chris! What did you expect? You tell me i’m all yours one night and then the next I find out you’ve been seeing other people! You’re a fucking liar.”
"This never started as anything more than a good fuck! We agreed, 'no strings attached', remember?" He yelled, using his fingers to air quote. He was right, there wasn't supposed to be strings attached but you hadn't planned on wanting more when your affair had first begun.
After some more harsh words were shared, you were leaving his house yet again, this time with tear stained cheeks and no intentions to return. Normally you would try to be quiet, not wanting to get caught, this time you didn’t even try to slowly shut the front door, letting it slam behind you. He could deal with the questions his brothers might have for him all alone, since that's the way he was choosing to leave you. Alone.
And you wanna scream Don't call me "kid" Don't call me "baby" Look at this godforsaken mess that you made me You showed me colors You know I can't see with anyone else
After that night, you promised yourself no more Chris. A relationship was never supposed to form and you knew that now based on how he had acted. The hurt was indescribable and since no one ever knew of your affair to begin with, you had no one to talk to about it. It was your own mistake and you were reaping the consequences.
You tried your best to move on, talking to some guy you had matched with on tinder. He was sweet, loved the outdoors, and he didn’t have to hide you. But he wasn’t Chris.
“Come on kid, what are you doing with yourself?” Chris laughed, mocking you for being with another guy so shortly after things had ended with him. He could read right through your expression as soon as he had seen you two at the party, whisking you away and into a room where you could talk one on one. You felt small under his intense gaze.
“Don’t call me that Chris… And for your information we aren’t even official yet, we’ve just been talking.” You replied, trying your best to stand your ground and not fall straight back into your old habits. The way he made you feel just by being in the same vicinity as you never failed to take your breath away.
“Does he treat you well?”
Your nose scrunched up, wondering why he would even care after all the shit he had put you through.
“Yeah- I mean, I guess… He’s a sweet guy.” You stuttered out, not reassuring Chris' concern whatsoever. His body inched closer to yours, you craved nothing more than to be held by him again.
“You know he’s never going to know you the way I do baby.” Chris whispered, your bodies now chest to chest as he leaned in closer to your lips. Shivers traveled down your spine as you tried to refrain from closing the distance between you and kissing the man you had been dreaming of ever since you left him.
Don't call me "kid" Don't call me "baby" Look at this idiotic fool that you made me You taught me a secret language I can't speak with anyone else
A lot had been on your mind since running into Chris at that party. Though you never kissed that night, you still couldn't deny the fact that you were constantly thinking about him. Your little fling had taken notice to the way you seemed to always act dazed when he was over. He chalked it up to stress, knowing you had been working in overdrive at your job. Little did he know that anytime he hooked up with you, you were imagining he was someone else.
Things ended with him quicker than they had started and you felt like you were back at square one. Alone, depressed, and still longing for the one guy you couldn't have, Chris. Things in your life that once brought you joy now only brought a sense of numbness. You didn't recognize yourself, and you weren't sure who you even were at this point in time.
The hours passed by as you tried to fall asleep, a task that was nearly impossible for you to complete as of recently. You could only flip over so many times, trying to get into a comfortable enough position to lull yourself to sleep. When you were sat in bed alone and restless, for the eighth night in a row, you decided to send a text.
2:43AM
Y/N: are you awake rn?
Chris: wow what's up ma
haven't heard from you in awhile
Y/N: i can't keep missing you like this
it's going to be the death of me
Chris: come over then
you know i always have a spot for you in my bed
Y/N: be there in 20
And you know damn well For you, I would ruin myself A million little times
The next morning you woke up, tangled in sheets. Chris had his arms wrapped around your waist. It felt good to be back in his arms.
"Good morning," Chris spoke behind you, the rasp you loved so much evident in his voice. All was well and you finally felt whole again. You spent the whole morning sharing kisses, eventually turning into the afternoon, before Chris had to get up and get started on some work project.
As you snuck out of his house for what felt like the hundredth time, you realized that nothing was ever going to change. You would always be the one running back to him, no matter how many times he would hurt you. Because at the end of the day, you needed him in your life, even if he didn't need you.
You would ruin yourself a million times, just for the short amount of satisfaction you got when you could finally be "his". And so you did.
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sevcasejay1chicago · 1 year ago
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We chose you- Matt, Kelly, Jay
Summary: You hear Erin Lindsey bad mouthing you in the bathroom at Molly’s. She opens up old wounds that only your boys can heal.
Warnings: cursing, mentions vomiting, diabetic
Authors note: Here it is my loves. This is a request from an anonymous friend. I hope you enjoy!
——————
Molly’s was packed. Stella was hosting her monthly karaoke night. The night was young, the drinks were cold, and the people were packed in the bar. You were sat at a back table with Jay, Will, Matt, Kelly, and Natalie. The music wasn’t the worst your group had heard, but that was the last thing on your mind. You and Will Halstead were up next. You had lost a bet to him earlier that day, so now you were stuck singing We Are Never Getting Back Together by T-Swift. Will won the bet, which got you on stage. The catch was that you got to pick the song.
When Stella loudly announced your song and called you and Will up, you practically had to be dragged away. You couldn’t believe that you had been talked into this. Hopefully the liquid courage would be enough.
About half way through the song, you realized that a very drunk Erin Lindsey with flirting with Kelly and Jay. Their attention was solely on her and, from the looks of it, they were not pushing her away. You felt anger rise in your chest, but locked eyes with Will and kept singing.
Once the song was over, you handed your mic to Will and stormed off into the bathroom. Reaching a stall, you immediately went in and sat down, grabbing toilet paper to blot the tears away in hopes of Matt not noticing that you had been crying. You figured Kelly and Jay wouldn’t notice, given that they were entertaining Erin.
Suddenly, you heard giggling as the door swung open. You huddled up with your feet above the view from under the door, hoping that nobody knew you were there.
“They could do so much better than her.” Erin slurred, giggling as Hailey Upton handed her a wet paper towel.
“Erin.” Hailey sighed, crossing her arms as she watched her drunk companion dab the paper towel on the back of her neck.
“What? She’s not as pretty as me. She has WAY more issues than me. I mean, I could hide my feelings for the most part. She’s just so whiny. I even feel bad for Matt.” Erin slurred, slapping the paper towel onto the counter and scoffing loudly. “They just pity her. Why have her when they could have me?” Erin asked as she walked out of the bathroom.
Hailey muttered something under her breath before she gave her reply, which got drown out by the music and then the door shutting behind her. You, however, were completely horrified. Deep down, you knew she was just talking shit. Right?
Pulling yourself together, you made your way back to your table and practically sat yourself in Matt’s lap as you eyed Kelly, Jay, Erin, and Hailey. You laid your head on his shoulder as you took a sip of his water.
“You okay baby?” Matt asked, lifting your hair from the back of your neck as he felt the heat coming from you.
“I don’t feel good. Can we go home?” You whispered in his ear before laying your head back onto his shoulder.
Matt rubbed your back and nodded. “Absolutely. Let me go collect the guys.” He replied, starting to stand and hand you off to Will to keep you company.
“Just leave them. Will can fill them in and Upton can bring them home.” You said, pouting at Matt. “I really don’t feel good and I wanna go home.” You whined, giving him your best puppy dog look, though you were literally getting nauseous by seeing the way Erin was all over them.
Matt eyed you and finally gave in with a nod to Will. “Alright baby. Come on. Let’s get you home.” Matt said, standing with you braced against his chest, kissing the top of your head.
After a short goodbye to the people at your table, Matt guided you through the crowded bar and out of the side door. He kept his hands on your waist and almost laughed when you breathed in a lungful of the cool night air. From there, he picked you up, bridal style, and carried you to Jay’s truck, easily depositing you into the front seat and buckling you in.
“Just tell me if you need me to pull over, ‘kay?” Matt told you, cupping your burning face in his palms.
“Kay.” You hummed closing your eyes and enjoying the coolness of his hands. You had to hold back a whine when he moved back and closed the door, missing the coolness of his hands and the comfort he brought you.
Matt drove home with your hand in his, making sure to be easy on his stops and turns. When he parked the truck, he looked over to notice that you were asleep with your head leaned against the back of the seat, your face toward him. Instead of waking you up, Matt quietly took you out of the car and carried you inside. He tried to gently undress you, but you woke with a start when the cool air hit your chest.
“Shhhh. I’m just changing your clothes baby.” Matt soothed, leaning over you to make eye contact. He could see the fear in your eyes until you recognized him. An old PD casing coming back to haunt you if Matt had to guess.
You breathed a sigh of relief and nodded, laying back again. “I’m good. I’m ‘Kay.” You slurred, still pretty drunk and very much half asleep.
Matt nodded. “Okay baby. I’m almost done and then we can go to bed.” Matt whispered, quickly changing you into one of his shirts before laying you against your pillow. “Need anything?” Matt asked sweetly, tucking the blankets around your shoulders.
You thought back to Erin’s comment and quickly shook your head, almost regretting how much it hurt to do so. “‘M good. Go back n have fun.” You whispered, starting to turn over and go to sleep.
Matt chuckled and started taking off his clothes. “No ma’am. I’m staying here with you.” Matt said, tossing his clothes in the hamper, along with yours. “Let’s remove your makeup so that your eyes aren’t irritated in the morning.” Matt proposed, walking toward the bathroom for your makeup wipes.
You wiped silent tears from your face as the feeling of being a burden almost immediately tried to swallow you whole. You weren’t completely sure if he was doing this out of habit or obligation after hearing Erin’s comments. “You don’t have to.” You said, trying to make your voice sound strong.
Matt came back in the room, wipes in hand. “Baby.” Matt cooed, immediately coming to your side. “Shhh. It’s alright.” Matt shushed, taking you into his arms as you shook with a sob. “Baby. What’s wrong? You feel sick?” Matt asked, knowing throwing up was a major fear of yours. You did, so when you nodded, you weren’t exactly lying. “Need to go to the bathroom?” Matt asked with a hum, staying calm to hopefully promote the same feeling within you.
You shook your head. “Sleep.” You whispered, sniffing and pulling yourself together.
Matt nodded. “Okay hunny. Hang on.”
Your loving boyfriend then proceeded to wipe your face clean of makeup and tears. Holding the wipe to your nose to blow after the crying made you sniffly. Then he tucked you back into bed and kissed your forehead.
“I’ll be right back to cuddle sweetheart.” Matt promised. He was only gone for a few minutes before he returned with some water, meds for your hangover tomorrow morning, and a trash can. “Trash can will be on the nightstand if you wake up feeling sick.” Matt said, placing it on his side of the bed, which meant you would end up waking him if you got sick in the night.
Matt finally slid into bed, plugged in your phones and turned out the lights. You weren’t going to object when Matt immediately pulled you into his arms since he initiated the contact. Instead, you got comfortable and fell into a fitful sleep.
You barely stirred when Jay and Kelly stumbled in at 5 am, but you were immediately hit with the smell of alcohol when you woke a few hours later. Luckily, Matt was already up and cooking in the kitchen, so he didn’t hear when you made a mad dash for the bathroom and threw up everything you consumed the night before. Afterwards, you brushed your teeth and showered, needing to make sure that the smell of vomit didn’t linger and to calm your racing heart. You brushed again before going out to join Matt in the kitchen.
For the next several days, you dodged Kelly and Jay. Constantly making an excuse to not be in the same room as them. You even went to bed early every night and slept on Matt’s side of the bed to ensure that the other two wouldn’t touch you at night. Every time you saw the boys do something for the other or heard them talking to each other in a loving way, your heart twisted in sadness. They sound and look so happy when you aren’t bothering them. The thought made you physically sick, which led to more vomiting and skipping meals, claiming that you had a big lunch or ate a snack.
However, you failed to notice that the boys were in fact taking notice of your presence, or lack thereof. It was bothering them, but they weren’t going to push you. They knew that you had your moments when you needed to be left alone, so they did just that until they couldn’t anymore.
A week after the incident at Molly’s, the boys were setting up their Friday night date night. They figured, since you haven’t wanted to be around them, that you wouldn’t want to be around other people. They were just finishing setting up when you walked through the door. Everyone stopped and looked at you. You were frozen in place, pale as a ghost and trembling as you breathed erratically. Everyone stayed frozen for a moment until you threw your stuff on the counter and ran for the bathroom.
All three boys were hot on your heels. Matt got there first, pressing you against his side with one hand and keeping your ponytail back with the other as you bent at the waist over the toilet. You were still hyperventilating and shaking.
“Shhhhh. It’s okay. It’s okay. I’m here.” Matt shushed, lightly rubbing your right side. It seemed odd that he could feel your ribs after only a week of barely touching you.
Jay and Kelly were moving about the master bathroom, both getting things you normally liked when you were sick. Jay eventually came over with a wet wash cloth and laid it over the back of your neck while taking your temp with the forehead thermometer.
“No fever.” Jay announced, reaching up to rub your back. He startled slightly when you flinched. You have never flinched when any of the boys touched you, when your sober anyway. Jay and Matt made eye contact when it happened, but were quickly drawn back to you as you heaved loudly.
“I-hmmm. Just l-leave, Pl-hukk.” You tried to plead, being cut off by a gag.
“No way.” Kelly said, taking you by the hips. You were swaying slightly now, the hyperventilating, plus the heaving and you locking your legs was clearly causing you to lose your balance. “Kneel down baby.” Kelly coached, pushing your hips slightly down to lead you onto your knees.
“Mm-m.” You shook your head, moving closer to Matt. “G-go. Ju-out!” You tried to exclaim, but it ended in a whisper as you sagged into Matt’s arms.
“Woah!” Matt said, catching you and lowering you to the ground.
Kelly immediately took a towel down and pillowed your head with it. Jay knelt down to check your pulse as Matt helped Kelly pull you into the recovery position.
“Pulse is strong but tacky.” Jay announced, keeping a hold of your wrist.
“Y/n? Open your eyes.” Matt called, tilting your face upwards to open your airways more.
You didn’t respond. Kelly took out the blood pressure machine and handed Jay the glucose monitor. The exchange was done silently and the devices were used immediately. Jay gasped as your blood sugar came up on the small device.
“Holy shit. It’s 45!” Jay exclaimed, immediately diving for the bag and pulling out the glucagon and spraying it into your nose.
“BP is pretty high for her, which makes since with a blood sugar that low.” Kelly commented, standing to run to the kitchen and grab you some orange juice.
“Let’s take her to the living room. Can you grab the trash can just in case?” Matt asked Jay, shifting you into his arms as you began to stir. “Shhhhh. We gotcha.” Matt murmured as Jay nodded and grabbed the first aid kit and trash can, following Matt out into the living room.
Matt barely had you laid down when you woke up. Immediately, you attempted to get up, still feeling nauseous and kinda flighty. You felt like a caged animal needing to escape.
“Hey hey hey. No baby.” Matt exclaimed, pushing you back down. “You just passed out from low blood sugar. Kelly is getting you some juice I think.” Matt soothed, sitting down next to you.
“M fine.” You said, trying to push yourself up again.
“Bullshit.” Kelly said, walking into the room with Jay behind him.
“Fine my ass.” Jay muttered, ripping open one of your zofrans and giving it to you.
You took the Zofran and sipped on the orange juice that Kelly brought in. Everyone was staring at you, but you averted your gaze as you began to connect the dots on what just happened. You knew what was coming next.
“Alright. Spill. What’s been going on with you lately?” Jay asked, sitting on the coffee table and trying his best not to seem intimidating.
You shook your head. “Nothin.” You said, trying to sound normal.
“No. That’s not an answer.” Kelly said, coming to kneel next to you. “You’ve been avoiding us, mostly me and Jay, for a week now. What did we do?” Kelly asked, pleading with his eyes.
“You really wanna know??” You exclaimed, hands trembling from more than low blood sugar. “I’m just surprised you haven’t gone back to Erin. I’m sure she’s still in town.” You scoffed.
“What?” Kelly and Jay both said.
“At Molly’s, she was flirting with you and you were flirting back. Then you didn’t come home until 5 am.” You had tears streaming down your face. “Erin didn’t know I was crying in the bathroom when she told Hailey how much better she is than me and how sorry she feels for you guys for having a needy girlfriend.” You explained, hastily wiping the tears from your face.
“Baby, we-“ Jay started, but you shoved the orange juice into his hand and reached for the trash can instead.
Matt pulled your pony tail back again as Kelly reached over to steady the trash can. You were just panting heavily, but saliva was dripping into the trash can along with your tears. Luckily, the Zofran was completely dissolved under your tongue.
“Shhhhhh. Breathe baby. Slow down.” Matt soothed, rubbing your back. “Let it pass baby. Just breathe and let it pass. You’ve gotten yourself all worked up.” Matt whispered, letting you keep the trash can as long as you needed to, but hoping that this was just nausea from anxiety.
You nodded, spitting and letting Kelly take the trash can. You immediately turned into Matt and hid your face in his neck. You let yourself sob, having been pent up for too long. You missed this. You missed your boys.
“Baby. We chose you.” Jay said, placing a hand on your back. “She did try, but we chose you and Matt.”
“We would never chose her.” Kelly said, sitting down next to Matt. “We had our fun, but that was the past. You and Matt are our future.” Kelly explained, placing a hand on Matt’s thigh.
“And we love taking care of you. We love that you love us enough to trust us with anything.” Matt said, planting a kiss on the side of your head. “I knew they wouldn’t leave us because I know how much they love us. How much they love you.” Matt whispered.
Tag list:
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yxtubers · 1 year ago
Text
𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐠𝐮𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐝
matt sturniolo x reader (angst/fluff)
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summary: after a huge misunderstanding, matt has to find a way to fix things
warnings/notes: mild argument, mentions of cheating
requested?: yes!
> > >
Ever since you and Matt started dating, you made an oath to never believe the things said online. People posted nasty comments about you and your relationship - so the deal was struck that you guys would advise each other should anything worrying come up.
This notion was quickly thrown out the window however once Matt witnessed something that made his stomach drop.
It was a picture of you and some guy. Shamelessly hugging at a café near town. He saw a huge grin plastered onto your face. He didn’t like jumping to conclusions, but when he saw another picture pop up on his timeline of you guys having a coffee together, his blood began to run cold.
Could this be?
He trusted you with everything he had, but something about this struck him as odd. You had told him you were just going to the post office - plus, he had never seen or heard of this ‘friend’ before.
Trying to give you the benefit of the doubt, his mind came to the conclusion that perhaps you had just run into an old friend and decided to catch up.
However when you came home and failed to mention your early morning rendezvous with this new friend of yours, he began to panic. He had specifically asked you what you did today in the hopes that you would ease his worries - but when you completely and blatantly lied to his face? He lost it.
“I saw you,” he blurted out.
You turned around to face him, confusion settling on your features. You set your keys behind you quickly and walked up to Matt.
“Saw me where?”
He huffed in annoyance. He hated that you were pretending to act clueless.
“With that guy,” he said. When you didn’t budge he kept going. “You were at a café. You’re lying to me - you said you went to the post office!”
He didn’t like accusing you of anything, but what was he supposed to think?
To be fair, it was true that you had been at the post office that day - but it was also true that you had been at that café. What Matt didn’t know was that what he saw was not an example of you being unfaithful, and when you tried to explain this, he wasn’t having any of it.
“No - you lied to me. And for what? To go see some guy? I trusted you!”
You could see the hurt on his face as he finished his sentence, his breathing picking up.
“He’s not just some guy!” you yelled back.
Matt was taken aback, involuntarily stepping backwards from you. He felt betrayed, and even more - angry. How could you be defending this man when he was trying to confront you for what you did?
“I didn’t mean it like that,” you trailed off, sighing.
You took a few steps towards Matt, but he backed away again, tears brimming at his eyes.
“He’s my brother.”
Matt scoffed, rolling his eyes. The audacity of you to come up with this bullshit shocked him completely.
“I’m not lying - look,” you said as you pulled out your phone and showed him some old pictures.
Sure enough, there was the café guy with you. Except you were both younger. Your mother could be seen behind you both, her arms wrapped around your shoulders.
The memory made your eyes sting, and before you could stop yourself you let out a huge sob, dropping your phone into Matt’s hands.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. I wasn’t ready yet - I haven’t seen him in years… I- I wanted to meet him first and-“ you said as you tried to keep the trembling in your voice to a minimum. “I’m not even sure if he’s gonna stick around this time.”
Matt furrowed his brows, looking intently at the images on your phone. Now that he noticed it, you guys did look alike - and now he felt horrible for assuming the worst of you.
Taking your phone back from him, you placed it in your pocket.
“I’ll explain everything another time. I think I just want to be alone right now,” you mumbled, your head throbbing from all the sudden crying. Sniffling and wiping away your tears, you grabbed your car keys off the table.
Before Matt could come to his senses and stop you, you were already out the door, reversing out of his driveway.
- - -
You made quick work getting home. Attempting to keep your tears at bay could only last so long, so you drove as fast as possible. Rain pattered against your windscreen and the squeaking of the wipers was all you could focus on to help calm your breathing down.
Seeing your brother for the first time in years made you extremely emotional. You were happy, of course - but the hurt that he caused you and your family still lingered whenever you saw his face. What hurt even more was that Matt thought you would ever betray his trust.
You didn’t blame him. The evidence seemed pretty convincing. Yet you wished you didn’t have to reveal this secret to him so soon. You wished you had more time to prepare - your brother had always been a sensitive topic to you. It was just easier to not mention him around Matt and his brothers. That would cause too many buried emotions to come up, and you really never felt like explaining your family drama.
How well that worked out, you thought to yourself.
What you didn’t know was that Matt had ran out of the house almost immediately. Chris and Nick had been out somewhere with the minivan, so he opted to run after you since your house wasn’t too far.
He tried to think of what he would say once he saw you. Nothing seemed good enough. How could he even begin to convey how sorry he was?
He was at your door in less than 10 minutes.
Seeing your car parked out front, he jogged up to your door, knocking desperately.
“Matt?” you said as you opened the door.
There he was on your front doorstep, soaking wet and shivering in the cold. His hair was dripping water onto the ground, and his tears were masked by the raindrops trickling down his cheeks.
“What are you doing?”
Grabbing his arm you pulled him inside, immediately grabbing a towel and wrapping him up.
You sat him down on your couch and turned on the heater, hoping to prevent him from catching a cold. Once Matt’s teeth stopped chattering, he began to speak.
“I can’t even tell you how sorry I am,” he whispered, his puppy-dog eyes welling up with tears once again.
“Matt-“ you began.
“Let me finish. I should have never accused you of cheating - I know you had your reasons for hiding this from me. I just want you to know that you don’t have to tell me anything you don’t want to. I’ll be here to listen whenever you’re ready, no rush.”
You pulled his head to your chest, hugging him tightly. Matt’s tears soaked your t-shirt but you didn’t care. All you were worried about now was him and how cold he probably was.
“I’m sorry too. I didn’t mean to lie to you,” you said as you toyed with the wet strands of hair on his head.
“And I hope you know I would never cheat on you. I’m sorry that you thought that.”
He raised his head, smiling at you.
“I know,” he said.
Grabbing your hands in his, he peppered kisses all over your fingers and palms, giving love to each individual finger and inch of skin.
“Last time I believe pictures from the internet,” he joked as he intertwined your hands, laying his head back on your shoulder.
“I thought that’s always been the deal, goofball.”
After a few moments of silence you pulled Matt off the couch, bringing him to your bedroom where you dried his hair off with your dryer.
His hands rested on your hips, playing with the hem of your shirt as he sat on your bed. You stood above him, making sure to get every strand of hair water-free for him.
“I love you,” he said as you unplugged the hairdryer from the wall, his eyes trailing across your features adoringly.
Resting it on the floor, your feet padded up towards him. You wrapped your arms around his neck and kissed his forehead which was nice and dry now.
“I love you too, baby.”
He pulled you on top of him, falling backwards onto the bed as he gripped your waist tightly. With your legs straddling him and Matt’s hold unwavering, you both fell asleep, happy as ever.
465 notes · View notes
konchitsya-leto · 5 months ago
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phrases and dialogues i saw floating out there in the internet as foxes!
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Neil: i'm going to go and get the healthiest 6-8 hours long sleep. i have 2 hours to do so
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Allison: yesterday i saw you with a boy
Andrew: it's my friend
Allison: you were kissing
Andrew: my very close friend
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Dan: after an argument some people feel they might have been too rude. i always feel like i've had to be ruder. like, maybe, starting a fight might've been of a not so bad choice. at least i should have kicked that moron's ass just once.
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Aaron: ach du heiliges aufmerksamkeitsdefizitsyndromkind
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Nicky: Seth, hi! i have a favour to ask of you. can you laugh less? you know, they say laughing prolongs your life, and i'd like you to die sooner. sorry for being rude
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Wymack: for fuck's sake, Andrew Joseph Fucking Minyard! where have you been? we called in every hospital and morgue out there, they said you're admitted to EACH OF THEM
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Matt: don't aim to do the whole task in one set. break down your main task into subtasks. then break down every subtask into micro-tasks. then break down every micro-task into nano-tasks. and then,
Renee: boom! there are no tasks; everything has dissolved into an existential hole as if it has never existed at all; however, what's even real in this perishable flow of being?
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Kevin: hi
Aaron: ...hi
Kevin: how are you?
Aaron: good
Kevin: hmm, why not bad?
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Seth: i have two moods: 1) the fuck you think i'm joking. 2) i'm joking
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Allison: i haven't completely fallen in love yet, so in my stomach there are caterpillars
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Aaron: the smartest ones made the smartest move: they died last year
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Kevin: i drink alcohol and they say i'm alcoholic but when i drink fanta they never say i'm fantastic
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Neil: i've lost motivation. i need some life goal, my life energy has burnt out
Andrew: i can accomodate you with kicking your ass
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Nicky: bonjour, motherfucker
Kevin: adios, bitchacho
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Wymack: don't worry, don't cry
Kevin: drink vodka and fly
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Renee: do you believe in god?
Andrew: no
Renee: you're such a nice looking guy!
Renee: and such a wrong thing is in your head
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[during a session]
Betsy: have you ever tried screaming?
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Andrew: i put the 'hot' in psychotic
Betsy: it's... Totally not how we handle it
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Allison: sorry, i have no mental resources for that
Aaron: just as how it was yesterday
Allison: just as how it'll be tomorrow
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Andrew: i like tall men. you walk next to them and can't hear what they are blah-blahing up there
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Abby: we can't giggle here
Neil: but why?
Abby: well, it's a crime scene?
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Abby: i'll tell you, jail is no fun
Wymack: you've been in jail???
Abby: once. in Monopoly
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Abby: you are all really well behaved today. what did you do?
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querenciasturniolo · 1 year ago
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leave ⮕ c.s.
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word count: 724
warnings: angst, swearing, crying
summary: “just leave.”
a/n: this one is…sad, there’s really no other way to put it. if you’re sensitive to angst (cut to me crying and listening to story of another us by 5sos on repeat while writing this), please don’t read below the cut. only take what you can handle, i hope you enjoy 🫶🏻
everything written is completely fictional. the people i write for are written with characteristics and mannerisms that i made for them, this is in no way depicting what would actually happen in real life.
You stared at your ceiling, your body and mind completely numb as you replayed last night over and over again in your head.
“Are you fucking serious right now? You sound ridiculous, Chris. Get over yourself.”
He scoffed and took a step back. “Get over myself? God, everything is always about you. I’ve been falling apart right in front of you for months, and you didn’t even see it!”
You winced, closing your eyes to keep them from burning as tears pooled out. It felt impossible to cry, you’d figured you’d run out of tears.
Your chest constricted as you watched his mouth quiver. “I just,” he started, his gaze dropping to the floor. “I can’t do this anymore.” He all but whispered. You took a step forward, your breath hitching in horror as Chris took a step back. After a few shaky breaths, his eyes met yours again. Tears cascaded down his cheeks as he shook his head. “I’m never going to be good enough for you, am I?”
Your breath hitched, your hands immediately covering your face as you tried to muffle the choked sob forcing itself past your lips.
“Chris, you’re my best friend—”
“I’m in love with you.” He interrupted, his voice breaking. “I’ve been in love with you our entire lives, and I know you’re not so fucking dense that you didn’t see it.” His words were like poison as they sank in, your stomach roiling with guilt.
Before you could reply, he cut you off. “I have followed you around like a lost puppy since we were twelve, and I can’t do it anymore.” He said, lifting his head completely. The muscle in his jaw tensed, any words you were going to say dying in your throat. He stared you down, his misery festering as your hand rested over your abdomen.
“Chris, I didn’t know.” You whispered, Chris shaking his head.
“Please, it was written all over my face every time I looked at you.” His voice was laced with sarcasm and venom. “Just…just leave.” He said, his voice cracking as he pushed his hair out of his eyes.
You felt like you’d been stabbed, all of the color leaving your face as you processed his words. “What?”
“Just leave, please?” The last word came out a broken plea, his eyes closing as he sighed sharply. When he opened his eyes again, they were certain, hardened in a way that you knew whatever he said next, he meant whole-heartedly. “I can’t…I can’t do this anymore.” He said. It felt as though everything inside you shattered as he walked past you and into Matt’s room, the soft click of the door practically echoing inside of your head.
You sat up out of your bed and threw your legs over the side of it. Nausea coiled in your gut, but you bit it back as you leveled your breathing. You tried convincing yourself that this wasn’t over, Chris wasn’t out of your life forever. He wasn’t, he just needed time to process this, and then you would see him again.
The truth was, once you thought about it, it was painfully obvious how much he cared for you. You’d never thought twice about his actions, thinking it was just Chris being Chris. You’d been blinded by your own obliviousness, just completely ignoring the underlying reasons for his actions.
He was in love with you, and you didn’t feel the same way. You didn’t feel the same way, and you hated yourself for hurting him. You could see the sadness in his eyes every time he looked at you, as subtle as it was. He was falling apart right in front of you, because you couldn’t just tell him the truth.
“I’m never going to be good enough for you, am I?”
You sat up straight and wiped your eyes.
“I can’t do this anymore.”
Standing from your bed felt wrong, but you took a deep breath and pushed your hair out of your face. You looked down at your phone and tapped the screen, begging whatever entity out there to let there be something, anything, from him. Your notification center practically mocked you as it showed up empty. You inhaled shakily, trying desperately to swallow the knot in your throat as you realized this was it—you lost him.
“Just leave.”
tags: @strniolo , @toyourloves , @ssturniolo , @jellybeanbby , @thetriplets3 , @mxriverse , @stvrni0lo , @gabbylovesreading , @dwntwn-strnlo , @tylerscreat0r , @emmssturniolo , @lvrsparadise , @tuktuk34 , @angelcake-222 , @20nugs , @obsessivencrazy , @lollibumblebee , @stargirlv0id , @babytomatoes , @ldontexistman
283 notes · View notes
quodekash · 8 months ago
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FUUUUUUUUUUUCKing hell theyre gonna kiss today????
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hes so grumpy already I love this so much
the silent conversations chain and toey are having with their eyes oml I cant
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pls this is so funny
theyre both deeply in love with someone else so it's jsut so unnatural to them
BUT ALSO id like to mention that the first thing chain did when he had to pretend to be hitting on toey was put his arm around his shoulders and rest his hand there. which is what he's literally ALWAYS doing with pun, no matter when it is, he's always standing next to pun with his hand resting on one of his shoulders
its like he associates his time with pun as being in a romantic relationship 👀
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THESE FUCKIN BASTARDS 😭
JUST KISS IM BEGGING YOU
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theyre lost in their own little world 🥺
kiIIIIIS
this is too funny, the cuts from "chain. chain what happened next." to ✨soulful dramatic guitar music✨
im sad they didnt actually kiss but also im not surprised
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LOOK AT THEM, DUDE
THEYRE SO NATURAL WITH EACH OTHER
I FUCKIN LOVE FRIENDS TO LOVERS SO SO MUCH
half convinced theyre already dating, they just cant be bothered saying anything so theyre waiting for others to ask them about it
PUN IS SO CUTE DUDE I ADORE HIM HES FUCKING ADORABLE
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I LOVE THEM SO FUCKING MUCH THEYRE SOIMPORTANT TO ME
if I ever have a romantic partner, this is what I want
I cant explain it, I just wanna run up to them with pure joy and excitement, and for them to hold me back by just pushing against my skull
it just seems perfect, idk why
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GB4JHERGB
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THE FRIENDSHIP OF ALL TIME
genuinely think I might be more invested in their friendship than all the romantic relationships in this show
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im fucking CRYING
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my king matt, this was so unnecessary and I love everything about it
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why does it suit him so well tho
they should kiss again I think
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I feel everything about this image on a spiritual level
THIS ENTIRE AMUSEMENT PARK SEQUENCE BRINGS ME SO MUCH JOY AND DOPAMINE IM IN LOVE WITH THSI EPUSODE
NEW COMFORT EPISODE UNLOCKED
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look its really funny but I do feel bad cos this day is not even a little bit fun for him
like q is having a complete shit time
poor chain doesn't love amusement parks but he has to go on the rides with toey to keep up the facade cos toey loves these rides 😭
and its even worse realising Q also seems to love amusement parks, so he would be having a fucking amazing time if he could just go on all the rides next to Q cos they both love it so much 😭😭
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fuckin FINALLY
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LMAO WHAT
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THIS IS SO FUCKING FUNNY I JUST SCREECHED WITH LAUGHTER SO LOUD AND ITS MIDNIGHT
THE PURE COMICAL SHOCK AS HE REALISDE WHAT HE SAID, THE EXCITEMENT FROM EVERYONE ELSE AS THEYR EALISE WHAT HE SAID
I mean to be fair it was REALLY obvious
im surprised no one noticed earlier but also its a bl so im not at all surprised to find out theyre all fuckin dumbasses
SERIOUSLY THO TANFANG IS WHAT I WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP HOLY SHIT
a lot of the time watching bls ill be like "I want that" but its usually as a joke
but THIS?? the fucking adhd bastard (me) who just wants to be near their partner and compliment and always stimming and just having a swell fucking time while the other one loves them but is mildly tired but also in adoration? FUCKIN GIMME
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also how the fuck has Q not realised, theyre all so fucking obvious
also also I cant explain it it just feels deeply as though pun and chain are for real dating they just havent told anyone yet
ill make a post about it all at some point maybe (I definitely wont)
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PHYSICAL TOUCH IS HIS LOVE LANGUAGE 😭😭😭
I LOVE THEM SO MUCH HE DOESNT HAVE TO HOLD HIM SECRETLY ANYMORE THEY CAN JUST WALK HAND IN ARM NATURALLY NOW
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hear me out tho, this gets even funnier if he's actually already in a committed relationship that no one knows about yet
I dont think it's secret dating, it's just 'not super obvious dating to try and see JUST how oblivious all our friends are. its been three years at this point and still no one's said anything. we're starting to lose all hope.'
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I love tan so much, the little wave
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what the FUCK
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what the FUCK FUCK???
THE SOUNDWIN LINE????
HERE IT IS ITS FUCKIN COMIN GUYS
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HE SAID IT
HE FUCKIN SAID IT
[insert that gif of the crowd of people in the bar going insane]
holy fucking shit dude holy fucking shit
my legs are literally shaking idk if I can do this
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FUCK TO THE YES, FUCKING EXPLICIT ASK FOR CONSENT HOLY FUCKING SHIT
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WHAT THE FUCK
AND THE FUCKING SONG IN THE BACKGROUND !!!!
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HOLY FUCKING SHIT DUDE
im gonna be here all day
I dont even need to watch the rest of the episode now
I can just go to bed if I want and watch the rest later or smth
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dude I cant wait for q to realise that toey is milk frappe guy
HOLY FUCKING SHIT IT JUST PROCESSED IN MY MIND THAT THEY KISSED
WHAT THE FUCK
omg making out in a haunted house, what a dream
the workers watching on the security cameras probably had a blast that day
how funny would it be if there'd been a scare actor in the shadows in that room with them and they'd been about to scare them but they were too shocked with that tender kiss to remember they have a job
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he needs to lie on his bed and just stare at his roof and think about that for a while
tbh same
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look at him 🥺 he's so lost in that memory
thEY FUCKIN MADE OUT HOLY FUCK
welp on that note I think im done for now
I might finish the ep with my silly thoughts+screenshots later but for now tis the time for sleep
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bondoes-art · 9 days ago
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First night at Freddy's spoilers!
So uh... How we feeling?
I loved it, even if their computer was being a pain. AJ whipped out the chainsaw, normal RE things.
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Mike and Lizzy, supportive siblings! Look at them go! It was kind of sad seeing her constantly calling the police to see if there was more info, and when that didn't work she got a job and a conspiracy board.
Matt being murderous business manager per usual, calling up 'MadPat' I loved the little call to his ego name that people decided on.
(Completely off topic, but let it be known I despise the fact that Casey's voice for Glitchtrap without the filter would totally work for my boy Ruthless, which I love and hate because now my brain wants me to animate the man to Glitchtrap lines)
"A little overtime never killed anyone." Bonnie no-
The ending, oh boy the ending. Baby driving in and running over Glitchtrap, allowing Lizzy to finish the job. Poor Baby got ptsd, though to be fair the cut of Lizzy with the drill probably would've freaked me out a bit if I was in her shoes. Then Baby was gonna attack her despite the animatronic's protests. Let's just say the blood(?) effects on that were phenomenal, but it was really sad. "Don't take me back there."
And Glitchtrap at the end, oh boy. It all seemed like it was going to be okay, Lizzy and the animatronic's made it through. They all leave right away except Lizzy, and then suprise Glitchtrap is not dead. He shocks the poor girl then blows the both up with Matt's weird plug in bomb.
The poor animatronics, they were so excited to leave with her and then the building blows up behind them. Never have I thought I'd feel such sorrow behind little plastic eyes. Nothing changed but they looked so sad.
And calling up poor Nate. Xander did a wonderful job on Freddy's lines there, I could feel the tears in his voice. I wanted to give poor tiny bear man a hug. They all just lost everything.
I started crying as the credits rolled. I also did at the end of Virus because the finality of it all hit me like a truck. The blooper clips from both the original and prequel, blurick07 art (congrats on that if you're reading this holy shit), the slowed revamp of Baby I Love You. You can't do that too me.
Fnaftm had been a part of my whole childhood, and the fact that it's all come to an end and I'm going to be an adult this coming July it's all kind of bittersweet. It's over, all in the most gorgeous movie.
It's gonna be hard to move on but I wish RE well in whatever comes next, fnaf or not.
I'm totally going to be making art at some point. I still wanna hug the little furry babies. :(
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vanteguccir · 11 months ago
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── ୨୧ ! 𝗧𝗛𝗘 𝗥𝗜𝗚𝗛𝗧 𝗟𝗢𝗩𝗘 𝗙𝗢𝗥 𝗠𝗘
      𝒎𝒂𝒕𝒕 𝒔𝒕𝒖𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒐𝒍𝒐 x fem!oc (Elena)
SUMMARY: Where Elena and Matt grew up together, fell in love as kids but realized too late. Will there be any hope for them?
WARNING: A little angst and mentions of cheating.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: That is my work, I DON'T authorize any plagiarism! | English isn't my first language, so I'm sorry if there's any grammar error.
Part 2
   ༻✦༺  ༻✧༺ ༻✦༺
Elena was born and raised in Boston, in a two-story house, next door to one of the most beautiful houses in the city, but not because of its external beauty, but because of who lived inside.
Elena grew up being the next-door neighbor of the Sturniolo triplets, she also studied at the same school as the three of them, these two factors made her and the trio become almost a fantastic quartet.
The four of them grew up together, ran down the street every day together, got dirty with dirt and mud on rainy days together, played cooking together (they were forced by her) and, best of all, they made mini "vlogs" together throughout their childhood and pre-adolescence, becoming literally inseparable.
Nick was Elena's confidant, always there to listen to her and give faithful advice to the girl, giving her a shoulder to cry on and a company to laugh when needed. Nick trusted Elena with his eyes closed and loved her with all his heart, so much so that she was the first one he came out to.
Chris was her partner in crime, the two grew up playing pranks on their parents, brothers (on his side) and neighbors. Chris saw Elena as his anchor, losing count of how many times he entered the girl's room through the window in the early hours of the morning to vent or just to be able to sleep with her company, dispelling his biggest fears.
Matt was a different case. Matt was the boy who took her as his date to every school dance and accompanied her to every friend's party. Matt was the boy who bought Elena flowers every week and took her to the city's summer amusement parks, always making sure to get her a different teddy bear. Matt was the boy who made her heart flutter, but also stay in a sacred calm; that made her body freeze, but also warm with affection. He was the one who introduced the feeling of love to her...
But who said he did anything about it? Despite acting almost like her boyfriend, Matt was afraid of rejection, after all, his heart belonged 100% to Elena and he couldn't bear having it completely stolen from him if she denied it. And that's why, out of a silly but genuine fear, he lost her.
At the age of 17, Elena moved to New York with her parents after her mother received a job offer that she couldn't refuse and that would open doors for her career. Seeing her leave was one of the hardest things Matt has been through, but the most painful was seeing her post on Instagram, 6 months after she left. Elena was dating, and it wasn't him.
Over time, things changed, the triplets moved to Los Angeles and grew dramatically on social media, becoming extremely well-known and loved on the Internet.
And Elena... well, Elena finished school and started International Relations at NYU, working at a coffee shop near her house so she could save money, since she was engaged. That's right, her boyfriend, Jeremy, of almost 2 years had asked her to marry him. It was a big shock and Elena had to think a lot before accepting, but it was her dream, to have a successful career and raise a family. Right?
Elena and Jeremy were in the middle of a month of decisions for the wedding, decoration, food, cake, clothes, etc., so Elena was feeling overwhelmed, it was a lot on her mind, and she found herself wondering if that was really what she wanted. Therefore, the girl (now woman) decided to pay a visit to her grandparents, who still lived in Boston. Cooling down in a place more than familiar to her seemed ideal now.
Elena just didn't expect that her grandmother would tell Mary Lou, and that Mary would tell Nick, who would tell his brothers, generating a secret collective trip to Boston. The triplets were dying to see Elena, after all, it had been 2 years since they had seen her best friend, or, in Matt's case, crush.
It was a Saturday morning when Elena landed in Boston, quickly grabbing her small suitcase and hailing a taxi at the airport's main pedestrian entry and exit gate, giving as her destination address her grandparents' house, which coincidentally, was on the same street where she grew up.
Elena planned to stay in Boston only until the next day, Sunday, since Monday she had classes again and she was going back to work, besides she knew that if she stayed much longer away from home, from Jeremy, he would lose his mind.
It didn't take long for Elena to arrive at her destination. The girl got out of the car after paying the taxi driver and took her suitcase from the trunk, thanking him once again before she knocked on the front door, waiting.
It was a big surprise for her when her grandfather opened the door and behind him were her best friends, Nick was holding a sign that said "WELCOME BACK, ELENA! WE MISSED YOU ♡", while Chris was holding three packets of her favorite candy in his hands and Matt held a bouquet of flowers that almost hid his red face, Elena wondered if it was from embarrassment or the heat from the summer.
The girl dropped the suitcase, bringing her right hand to her mouth, covering half of her surprised expression. She felt her eyes fill with tears, God, how she missed the three boys.
Next to her were her grandparents, with big smiles on their faces and bright eyes, watching her with a mix of affection and pride.
"Oh my God, you guys are crazy! What are you doing in Boston? I thought you were in LA!" Elena exclaimed, her voice cracking mid-sentence with high emotions.
"We were, but Grandma told our mom that you were coming here today and I couldn't handle missing my best friend anymore." Nick said as he placed the poster on the couch. He turned quickly and ran to the girl, hugging her tightly. The action seemed to wake Matt and Chris, who quickly moved and formed a mini line behind the oldest.
"Damn, you look old" Chris joked when his brother got out of the hug, laughing loudly when Elena hit his forehead. "Here, to sweeten your life." He scoffed, handing the candy packets to her.
"I have to check if these aren't sour candies, coming from you I expect everything." Elena joked, taking the candies and placing them on top of her suitcase. She opened her arms and hugged Chris momentarily.
Chris pulled away as they separated and positioned himself next to Nick, the two exchanging glances before turning their gaze to Matt.
"They're pink tulips, I hope they're still your favorites" Matt stepped forward, showing the full bouquet before handing it to her.
"Oh Matt, they're beautiful! Thank you" Elena received the bouquet, smelling them quickly and mentally punishing herself for blushing.
Matt smiled widely and watched her for a few seconds, only breaking out of his trance when he heard Elena's grandfather make a fake cough. The boy shook his head and walked away, lowering his gaze to the ground.
Elena quickly placed the bouquet on the coffee table and finally greeted her grandparents, placing kisses on their age-marked cheeks.
"Let's take these things to your room and make plans for the weekend!" Nick spoke loudly, throwing the candies to Chris and taking the small suitcase in his hands, before starting to climb the stairs without waiting for anyone.
Elena laughed loudly as she heard Chris swear at Nick as he bent down to pick up the packages that fell at his feet. Matt shook his head, smiling as he saw the girl take the bouquet with extreme delicacy.
The three following the oldest up the stairs.
     ༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺
Hours later, the quartet found themselves in the triplets parents car, parked at the Mc Donald's they grew up going to, while eating their favorite burguers and catching up on conversations. They spent the afternoon driving around the places they went when young, which made Elena's heart warm, she missed that, that feeling of calm, without any burden, without obligations or responsibilities, just the interest of being happy.
During that early morning, Elena woke up to the sound of rocks hitting her window, which she quickly recognized. What surprised her was that when she got up and approached the window it wasn't Chris there, but Matt.
"What are you doing here?" Elena asked in a whisper after opening her window, squinting her eyes as she tried to better see Matt's silhouette in the pitch black night.
"Let me in." Matt whispered back, ignoring her question as he looked down to check if he wasn't about to fall off the edge of the roof.
Elena sighed and walked to the side, giving Matt space to enter through the window, closing it shortly after to stop the night wind of entering the room.
"What are you doing here at this time?" Elena asked again, sitting on the edge of her bed and watching him.
"As if I didn't pay you visits in the early hours of the morning before." He responded smiling, sitting on the bed and dragging himself until his back was against the headboard and his legs were stretched out on the mattress. He slapped his hand on the space beside him, looking at Elena.
The girl sighed but smiled, following his silent request.
"I missed you" Matt commented. "It's strange to live life without you with us"
"I miss you too" Elena replied, looking at him. "It's strange to only keep in touch on the phone and find out about some things through social media" She continued, receiving a nod from the brunette.
"You still have them" Matt realized as he noticed all the teddy bears he got for Elena piled up on top of the dresser next to the closet.
"Of course I have them, why would I throw them away? They're cute and remind me that you're actually good at something" She scoffed, receiving a light push from the boy.
"As if you weren't rooting like crazy for me while I was trying to hit the game targets" He mocked back, seeing Elena roll her eyes with a big smile on her face.
"Obviously, getting teddy bears is better than buying them, have you seen the prices of these little things?" Elena gave a low laugh when she saw Matt open his mouth exaggeratedly, soon after the two burst into laughter together.
"So, are you really going to get married?" Matt asked suddenly after they calmed down, looking directly at her.
"Yeah, I will" She replied, lowering her gaze to her hands, specifically to the silver ring on her left ring finger.
"You don't look very excited" He commented, making the girl sigh.
"I just... I don't know, I'm so young, you know? I'm only 20, getting married seems a bit drastic right now, but Jeremy thinks it will be good for our future, us having the same last name will help in the office" She replied, furrowing his eyebrows.
"What does he do for a living again?" The brunette asked.
"He currently works at his father's office and studies law," Elena said, noticing the grimace he made at her response. "What?"
"He doesn't seem like your type. In fact, he seems like quite a daddy's boy." Matt commented, regretting it seconds later after seeing Elena's eyebrows raise in surprise.
"And what do you know about my type, Matthew?"
"I'm sorry, ignore what I said" Matt intervened quickly, the last thing he wanted was to fight with Elena now, knowing that after that Sunday, he didn't know when he would see her again. Maybe at her wedding, the boy felt himself shudder at the thought.
Elena sighed.
"You know that my dream has always been to be successful with my career and have my own family. Us getting married would give me both... Having his last name, I will be able to start my International Relations profession within the office that soon will be his, which will make me grow faster on the career, and I'll have my own family." Elena spoke while gesturing.
"Sounds like there's a lot of self-interest involved" Matt commented.
"Matthew!" The girl exclaimed, making him raise his arms in a sign of redemption.
"Sorry, sorry." He sighed. "I remember, you know."
"What?" Elena looked at him confused.
"How you always wanted a family, when we were kids me, Nick and Chris were always messing around and you were playing mommy with your barbies. You wouldn't let go of that damn Baby Alive even if you were paid to, always taking her everywhere." Matt let out a laugh as he remembered, making Elena laugh along as she saw her own smaller figure running after the triplets with her doll in hands.
"You can't say anything, you always took care of my Baby Alive when I asked you to" The girl replied with a wide smile, watching Matt roll his eyes exaggeratedly while she laughed as quietly as she could.
The brunette turned to her to rebut, but stopped in his action, reinforcing in his mind every detail of the face of the girl who had his heart in her hands, details that he had memorized a long time ago and still found himself remembering and tracing in his mind on sleepless nights.
The two stared deeply at each other for what seemed like an eternity, before Elena looked away and fake coughed.
"Just think about your decision Elena." Matt asked softly before getting up from the queen sized bed.
"Where are you going?" Elena looked at him again, her eyes pleading, as if she was afraid he would leave her there, alone and without him.
"I'm going back home, if my mother wakes up and doesn't see me in bed in the morning, I'm sure she'll freak out, and the situation won't turn out very well for us." He spoke with a sigh, going to the window and opening it, looking back one last time, before moving outside, closing it again before disappearing from the girl's vision.
Elena stood still for a few minutes, processing the conversation and that last moment, feeling her heart sink at the thought of not seeing the boy again for a long time after Sunday. It felt like a goodbye.
༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺
On the next day, Elena woke up significantly early as she felt the sun's rays coming through her window. As she opened her eyes, ready to complain about why it was so bright in the room, she remembered Matt leaving and how she forgot to get up and close the curtains.
The girl sighed, before getting up and getting ready for the day. She felt excited to be able to see her friends again, but her heart ached at the thought that that very night she would leave again.
After getting ready, Elena took her cell phone and saw a message left by Jeremy.
"I hope you're having a good time there. I can't wait to have you here again today, I can't stop looking at the wedding catalogues. Do you prefer chocolate or vanilla cake? xx, jeremy"
Elena sighed again, it's obvious she preferred vanilla, how did he not know that? The girl shook her head, deciding to answer him another time.
     ༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺
"What are we doing today?" Nick asked as they found themselves in front of the triplets' door, as they had done years before.
"I thought we'd go to the amusement park, the one that only opens in the summer, you know? Like old days." Matt suggested. Elena looked at him when she heard about the park, quickly looking away when she saw him already looking back at her. She needed to stop this.
"Let's go then!" Chris spoke loudly, running over to his parents' car again, fiddling with the passenger door handle impatiently, begging Matt to unlock it.
Elena laughed at the action, running to the car too and soon getting into the back seat, sitting behind Chris's group, having a view of the driver's seat.
A few minutes later the four arrived at the amusement park and started going on the basic rides, which the four liked, bumper cars, roller coasters and carousel.
"Can we go on the ferris wheel?" Elena asked, puting her hands in a sign of prayer and looking at the three of them with a pleading look.
"I'm not going, it's too boring. I want to go to the arcade area" Chris replied, ignoring the girl who was begging.
"I want to go to the arcade too!" Nick shouted, raising his hand like a child and approaching Chris, making Elena roll her eyes and cross her arms with a huff.
"I'll go with you." Matt said looking at Elena, who smiled big, taking his hand and dragging him through the park to the ferris wheel line, ignoring the taller man's protests.
     ༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺
"Wow, I don't remember the last time I entered a cabin like that" Matt commented, closing the small door behind him and sitting on the single bench next to Elena, who smiled as she nodded and looked at the outside view through the cabin's glass window.
Matt found himself watching her, taking note of her profile, feeling himself falling in love with her all over again.
It didn't take long for the wheel to start moving, the cabin swayed a little making Elena let out a surprised sound, holding onto Matt's arm to steady herself.
"Sorry, I don't remember it moving that much" She commented, smiling awkwardly as she took her hand off the boy's arm, watching him wave his hand like it was nothing.
The two focused their eyes outside the cabin, taking note of the people who looked like little ants as the cabin rose higher, the blue sky with few clouds, the light breeze that blew and the birds that passed by in the distance. Elena looked at the cabin ahead and saw a couple cuddling each other, smiling big as they also watched the view, and she found herself trying to remember if she had ever been through that with Jeremy, but her mind came out was blank.
Her chest tightened as she realized that she had never even been to an amusement park with Jeremy, or a park, or a romantic walk. With Jeremy it was always all about work and having the perfect status.
Her gaze changed from the couple to Matt, noticing that he was also looking at the couple, but quickly his blue eyes focused on her as well.
"I love being able to look at you up close like this," Matt whispered, as if he was afraid of speaking too loudly and end what they were having.
Elena smiled, blushing, but forcing herself not to look away from him, she didn't want to miss that moment for anything. Her eyes took in all the little details of Matt's face, his sparkling blue eyes with dilated pupils, his nose perfectly shaped and the right size for his face, his cheekbones slightly reddened by the heat, his big, messy hair, his beard starting to appear again due to the time without shaving it... She felt like she could stay there forever.
Matt moved slightly closer, stopping with his mouth centimeters from hers, seeming to wait to see if she would pull away, which she didn't. Elena held herself in place, yearning to feel him.
Matt, realizing that there was no movement on her part, moved closer until their lips touched, and Elena felt that everything she read in romance books about the sensations of electricity through her body and the fireworks around her when kissing her right person was true.
Matt let out a sigh through his nose at the sensation, feeling instant relief and as if a weight had been lifted from his shoulders. He never wanted to leave there again.
It was just a touch of lips, but it was enough for them at that moment. It was exactly what they needed.
Elena pulled away first, still with her eyes closed, trying to prolong the feeling and sensations in her body and mind. When she opened her eyes, she noticed Matt already looking at her, smiling broadly, and she returned the smile.
"I love you." Matt blurted out, making Elena's eyes widen. "Elena, I'm sorry for not having said or done anything before, but I've loved you for as long as I can remember, since the first flower I plucked from my mother's garden and gave to you, since the first time you gave me your Baby Alive for me to take care of as if it were the most precious thing in the world, since the first day you asked me to kiss your scraped knee to heal it. I've loved you for so long and I was an idiot for not saying it. And it's okay if you don't want me, you're engaged, you have a life in New York and... Asking you to leave all of this is impossible, but I needed to tell you."
Before Elena could process it, the bubble around the two seemed to burst as the ferris wheel stopped and their turn was over, the little cabin door opening again.
Matt cleared his throat, getting up and helping Elena out. When they both touched their feet on the floor, Elena felt her cell phone vibrate, picking it up only to see that Jeremy was sending her a new message about the wedding, and at that moment she fell to reality, she had cheated on her fiancé with her best friend. A bitter taste entered her mouth, her body froze and a horrible feeling took over her heart. God, what did she do?
Elena quickly pulled away from Matt, feeling her hands shake. She put her cell phone in her bag and turned to the taller man, seeing him looking at her with a worried look.
"Matt I cheated on him... I-I cheated on my fiancé with you." She stuttered. Matt looked at her with a weight on his eyes, feeling horrible for having contributed to that, blaming himself for kissing her, wanting to go back in time and not even agreeing to go on the ferris wheel with the girl.
He loved her, but she didn't love him back, not like he wanted her to.
"Elena look, it's going to be okay, you can talk to him, I swear I won't approach you again, I'm sorry-"
"I-I need to go."
"What?" Matt stopped walking completely.
"I need to go Matt." She looked into his eyes, feeling guilty as she saw immense pain in the blue pools. "Don't go after me, please. I'm sorry."
Elena turned and ran away, wiping the tears that fell from her eyes without stopping and feeling an emptiness and weight in her chest, as if part of her had stayed with Matt.
     ༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺
The girl got out of the taxi in front of her grandparents house and walked to the door, taking the spare key that her grandfather had given her, trying to unlock the lock with her blurry vision.
"Elena?" The girl heard her grandmother call from the kitchen after closing the door behind her.
"Hi grandma." Elena responded, her voice cracking from the held back cry.
Her grandmother quickly appeared at the kitchen door after noticing the difference in her granddaughter's voice, approaching with quick steps when she saw the youngest's red eyes and wet cheeks.
"Oh Elena, what happened?" The older woman asked worriedly, taking Elena's shoulders and leading her to the sofa, sitting her on the soft surface and sitting next to her.
"Why does love hurt so much, grandma?" Elena asked, letting out a sob. Her grandmother sighed, pulling her into a tight hug.
"Oh Elena, love doesn't hurt dear. It took me many years to learn that, if love is right for you and your heart, and it's reciprocal, it doesn't hurt, it wasn't made to hurt. It was with your grandfather that I learned that love is free, it is generous, it is safe and it empowers you in a way that makes you feel stronger and like you can conquer the world." The oldest explained with a smile. "Do you want to talk about what happened?"
"I kissed Matt." Elena said, looking down at her hands, quickly looking away from the ring. "We went to the amusement park we went to as kids, I wanted to go on the ferris wheel and he accompanied me, we had a moment and we kissed."
"He always looked at you differently... And you at him, so much so that I swore you two would end up together. I remember all the times you came running here with a new flower in your hands and said it was from Matt, as If I didn't already know that." Elena smiled upon hearing her grandmother's words.
"But grandma, I'm engaged." She whispered regretfully.
"Do you love Jeremy?" The eldest asked, cupping her granddaughter's cheek and lifting her face so she could look her in the eyes.
"I-I... I don't know." Elena desperately tried to feel for Jeremy what she felt for Matt. "I don't feel about him what I feel when I think about Matt, or when I'm with him. Jeremy is an incredible man, with a planned and perfect life... I feel so pressured sometimes, like I have to be perfect all the time to fit in with him and his plans. It's not light, grandma."
Elena cried harder when she realized how heavy her days were with Jeremy, how she always had to have the most impeccable and perfect clothes, with the best posture, the most flawless makeup, the best-groomed hair and the best modes. How she felt about being looked at and evaluated by everyone all the time, especially at Jeremy's parenting conferences or in her father's office.
"Elena, pay close attention to me, what does your heart say if you spend more time worrying about perfection than kissing him? If you spend more time in the day thinking about a thousand things than living love lightly? Do you feel like to run away when with him? Honey, I'm sorry, but that's not love. Not the right one for you, at least."
Elena looked at her grandmother, surprised by her wisdom and how it all made sense.
Jeremy was a perfect man, but not for her. Matt was her perfect match.
God, what would she do now? She ran out of the park and left Matt all by himself after he declared his love for her. And she still had Jeremy...
"I already know what I gave to do."
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girlboypersonthingy · 10 months ago
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Hii!! I've noticed you haven't posted in a while and I wondered if you we're feeling okay.
If you can, could you write a pidge x fem reader on a birthday? Like what reader would for pidge's birthday or what pidge would so for reader's birthday. Either or both would be great since there aren't a lot of pidge fics around 😭😭😭
Thanks so much if you end up writing this!!
YESSSSSSS PIDGE IS SO BABY I LOVE HERRRR 🥹 obvi im gonna do both scenarios! Also, thanks for your concern, anon. 2023 started great and then the second half of the year just felt way too chaotic and overwhelming. I lost my motivation to write for a minute there. Still trying to get back into the swing of it. Anywaysssss ENJOY~
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Pidge’s Birthday
Honestly, this babe would be so grateful to just have everyone on the team, you included, wish her a happy birthday at some point throughout the day.
Pretty much any gesture made after that would really make her special day even more special
And then you get/make her gifts and maybe even get everyone to very annoyingly sing her happy birthday and you and Hunk work really hard to make her a cake and-
And maybe you even give her a birthday kiss on the cheek or on her nose and she thinks she might just pass away rn
She feels very appreciated and seen.
This might just be me projecting and self-inserting here but I think Pidge would have a love hate feeling towards her birthday bc it lowkey hurts her feelings when ppl she’s close to don’t remember her bday bc I just know she always remembers everyone else’s and always wishes them a happy bday.
Like c’mon! Just shoot her a text at least!
Matt definitely gives her birthday punches every. single. year. Sorry just had to add that in here.
You can join in if you want but Pidge may feel a bit betrayed
If you decide to fight Matt and protect your girl instead, she’ll be cracking up laughing as she watched you two idiots goof off.
Probably tears up a tiny bit when everyone gathers in the same room to sing her happy birthday bc she feels so important but if you ask her if she’s crying she’ll for sure deny it.
Definitely wants to spend some alone time with you at the end of the day. Cuddles, playing video games in the darkness of her messy room, soft giggles and light blushes as you two share gentle lingering touches.
Thanks you profusely for caring enough to treat her so well on her bday
Reader’s Birthday
So if she knows when your birthday is ahead of time, she’ll totally take her time putting together some awesome birthday plans for your special day.
If she ends up finding out that your birthday is only a few days away, best believe she is running around like a wild beast, basically begging every other team member to help her put something decent together in just a couple days.
She looks so calm and chill on the outside, but inside she’s screaming and panicking and freaking out.
Tries her best, regardless of time restraints, to make your day completely stress free, fun and exciting.
Probably ends up doing some pretty simple things for you like helping Hunk make a cake, putting up some cheesy decorations, waking you up with breakfast and coffee in bed, getting everyone together to sing to you
BUT she makes sure that even these typical birthday gestures are just perfect for you.
Takes her time with the cake, even nitpicking Hunk as he tries to decorate the cake with icing.
Basically threatens anyone Keith who doesn’t want to join the happy birthday singing bc she’ll be damned if anyone is missing as they all swoon over you and watch you blush at their song.
Definitely makes you some cool tech gift like a little bot that follows you around and protects you or a cool little gadget you can listen to music on
Asks you at least 4,592 times throughout the day if you’re having fun, enjoying your day, feeling okay. She’s so sweet and considerate
She for sure wants to give you a bday kiss but baby girl is so so nervous, she can’t bring it up to you.
Doesn’t even have to be a kiss on the lips although she wouldn’t mind she just wants to give you at least one small show of affection before the end of the day.
Yeah, she holds your hand and gently rubs your back a few times throughout the day but that’s stuff she normally does so today, on your birthday, she wants to take it just a tad bit further
And you bet your ass she’s gonna ask you first bc consent is sexy okay?
“(Y/N)?” Her voice is shaky as she sits on her bed beside you.
“Yes?” And now the intense eye contact and heavy silence makes you both start panting.
“Can I kiss you?” Her pretty eyes are moving rapidly as she searches your face for any hint of protest and her own face is twisted up with anticipation.
You don’t even have to reply, just lean in and kiss the girl already!
It’s probably the simplest but ABSOLUTE BEST birthday you’ve ever had 💚
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parkersdahlia · 5 months ago
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tough love || m.s
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𝜗ৎ based on tough love by gracie abrams
𝜗ৎ warning: mentions of being drunk that's it i guess
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you were currently sitting on a train, it was a saturday night and you felt crappy like you wanted to cry because your boyfriend of 2 years was gone. it was the night after your 24th birthday and the guilt of breaking up with him was starting to catch up. you had done it over text, telling him that it was the right thing to do. he was freaking out constantly asking you why and was it something he'd done or said. you explained to him how his growing popularity with his brothers meant that fans will get increasingly invasive and mean. he said he didn't care but you were pretty firm on your decision. he asked to meet up atleast once to talk things out and figure things out but you refused.
It has now been a week and at first you didn't feel much guilt but last night when you were celebrating, surrounded by your friends, you suddenly missed his presence and the guilt catching up to you. in a drunken state you stalked one of his brother's story and found out they're currently home. which is why you found yourself in a train that was taking you to boston. sitting in his jacket that had a little rip in the side. you look around the train full of strangers. normally, it would freak you out but not right now. you liked these strangers more, more than anyone else in this moment. you found being surrounded by them oddly comforting. you sat there and thought about how you hated when you both fought. It sucked. but then you thought whatever ,he's just one of the boys afterall and you're so young and you can date whoever you want and leave when you feel bored. there was no need to be so sad about it right?.
the train eventually came to a halt and you got down. the cold evening boston breeze hitting you, making you shiver and hug yourself tightly holding the jacket closer. you took a cab to his house feeling weird and doubtful all of a sudden about what you were doing. travelling all the way to his hometown all of a sudden? after ghosting him and not returning even one of his desperate calls or texts. was this right? you thought to yourself. you don't get much time to think because the cab was pulling up outside his house making your heart stop. you got down and called him before you could chicken out. he picked up making your heart skip a few beats "y/n?" he said "um hi" you said awkwardly, surprised at the fact he hasn't blocked or deleted your number yet "um c- can you- um I mean coul- could y- could you come outside?" he was confused "what? outside where?" he asked completely lost. you closed your eyes and gathering all your courage "can you come outside please? I'm here outside your house and I wanna talk" you said desperately. he goes silent for a moment. he peeks out of the window seeing you stand there completely shocked at the sudden visit. "matt?" you confirm if he's still there "um yeah i- I'll be there hold on" he said hurriedly ending the call. he comes out as you're standing there wearing his old jacket and hands shoved in the pockets. he looked so confused and totally not expecting this. "hey are you okay? is everything alright? " he asked concern lacing his pretty features and his voice. "um yeah everything is fine don't worry i- i just wanted to talk" you said looking down "I know this isn't the best time and after what I did i thought the least I can do is give you a proper explanation. I owe you" you see his features relax at that, making relief wash over yours. he nodded and your heart settled feeling greatful that he was willing to give you a chance to explain. matt was still angry and confused but he thought if you travelled all the way here just to talk then you deserved the chance and he really wanted to make things right too. he missed you so. he looks at you for a moment a little smile tugging at his lips "oh and by the way, happy belated birthday " he said , making you smile at the the fact he remembered. he took you to a coffee shop where you both talked things out, mostly you as you spent the time explaining why you did what you did and why you still think it's the best decision for the both of you. he kept on saying that he didn't care about the fans and that he can handle it, but you were firm on your decision. you told him with the amount of time spent working and increasing popularity of him and his brothers, it was easy for things to get out of control before he even realises and that he may feel like this is a bad decision right now but will resent your relationship down the line because things change and you didn't want to hold him back. "matt I'm so proud of you for doing so well but the timing isn't right" he shook his head vigorously assuring you none of that will happen. you looked at him, pained look takes over your features as you try to get your point across. you chuckled when he tried to call your bluff in desperation thinking you're making some sick joke and you shook your head. you told him you weren't just thinking about yourself but also about him and how vicious fame can be and how not charmed you are with the idea of it all and that's why you're leaving. he wouldn't understand but there's only so much explaining you can do "you'll understand my reasons eventually" you said giving his hands a squeeze whispering a quiet "goodbye" as he refused to meet your eyes swallowing his tears. you left him there in pieces, you didn't know what else you were leaving for.
leaving the coffee shop you felt heavy weight on your shoulder still lingering, not quiet off and with you not home and nowhere else to go you decided to take a walk by the river. the cold night breeze making you shiver as you kept walking you found a bench and decided to sit there and gather your thoughts. greatful for this little bench that gave you somewhere to go and washing you with a feeling of home. you sat there for a while thinking and rethinking things. it was getting too much, the constant thought of what if you were doing something wrong , what if this was a mistake and the hurt that came with breaking someone's heart you didn't want to think anymore. you felt the strong urge to forget and drown out your feelings. you realised there's a bar down the road, deciding on spending whatever time you have left in boston there.
you get to the bar only to run into the sister of a boy you had met through some mutual friend back in college. you and her decided to get wasted toghether. you didn't know her well but you knew she was a bit of a weird intellect. she was very harsh and direct with her words. she really liked to tell the truth and say things for what they are. that's why all her boyfriends up and left , they couldn't take her honesty. she just had that effect to her, you thought to yourself. you told her how you had just broken the heart of your boyfriend who is now an ex. you told her being honest and leaving feels brutal she nodded and said "but that's just tough love and you're lucky to receive it right?" she said hitting the table to go with what she's saying, god she was hammered , you thought to yourself. "he'll just crumble to pieces" she continued sipping on her drink shrugging her shoulders making you chuckle. "love is not always soft sometimes it's tough. I mean you left him because you were thinking about him and you care for him, right?" you nodded "you left him even though it hurt you , you left him because you don't want to hold him back. he may not understand it now but he will eventually" she said. she had a harsh way of telling things but she was also right.
after leaving the bar you walked towards the train station waiting for a train back home. you settled down inside the train, still clad in his jacket, in a similar position you found yourself in hours ago but this time your mind was much lighter and the weight lifting off by the second. you thought of all the negatives. everyone talks about things you'll miss when you seperate from a person but you tried to think of things that you won't miss about him, trying to make yourself feel better about leaving you though how you weren't going to miss the way he kicked you in your bed while sleeping, a childhood habit of his, or his crappy rich influencer friends who were entitled and so full of themselves who preferred to spend their nights binge drinking, or his old inflated ego that he couldn't hide sometimes knowing there's so many people that wanted him, or his shallow thinking, you were not doing to miss denying that you've got your own damn reasons. a smile taking over your lips as you thought there was no way you were wasting your 20s on random men. they were nowhere close to being cooler, smarter or tougher than all your friends and although you hated the thought of leaving someone's heart bleeding , you were still free and young and not ready to be with someone if it didn't feel right. you took a deep breath smiling to yourself,
now knowing and understanding, what you truly left for.
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a/n: shaking as I type this because this is literally my first fic ever and I'm so scared and excited to put this out. I've wanted to write this for so long honestly but a huge shoutout to @jayz4dayz4 making that post that finally pushed me to write it and put it out <33 hope this is good enough xx
divider by : @poemale
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rinaforpages · 1 month ago
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matthew x reader
heavy angst. hurt, comfort.
nonidol!reader (reader is a student)
happy thanksgiving lol (i’ll post another more happier one too i promise)
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the phone calls were always short. he was busy, and that you understood. it didnt hurt less, though. the "oh, i have to go." or the "sorry babes" went through your heart. you were tired. you knew he loved you, of course, but you couldn't help the doubts in your mind.
so when it was 2 weeks without calls from your boyfriend, you really started to doubt things. your roommates, (some of your best friends at ubc) noticing your depression, brought you out drinking. it wasnt the brightest idea, because you only got more depressed and then angry, to the point they had to confiscate your phone to prevent you from angry calling your boyfriend.
it was three weeks and you were in final weeks, so you completely set your phone to do not disturb. matthew and your parents were the only people who could get through. still no call from him. your parents even called after exams were over to check up on you. you asked them for some money for a plane ticket. your friends called you foolish. your parents sighed, but agreed. matthews parents (when you saw them at the store to get alcohol for the post-final party) had no idea why he was no contact.
it was a whole month without contact from matt, and you had given up. your finger hovered over "send" on the "lets break up" message multiple times a day, but you always found yourself swiping out of the app. your friends were sick of seeing you moping, and they were beyond pissed at matthew. your and matthews parents struggled to understand the situation, and you didnt want to explain it. his sister offered to call him for you, but you refused. you didnt want to fight him in front of his family.
you had lost too much weight from worrying about matthew in 5 weeks. it was silly, really. you weren't really anyone on your own. your friends and family attempted to bring you out, or make you food, only for you not to be hungry. who were you if not matthews girlfriend or a student? you struggled with that question for a while.
6 weeks without matthew came and went, and you watched him smile on your screen a lot. you didnt smile along, like you usually did, but you didnt cry, either. you felt empty. you didnt smile much outside of that, either. they werent doing much convincing before, but they had to now.
"yn, please sweetheart. let him go." lilly said at 7 weeks. you shook your head as her boyfriend brought up the takeout. "yn, its been 7 weeks since hes contacted you. i dont care how fucking busy he is. thats unacceptable."
you glanced at the phone on the table, waiting for it light up with a call from matty❤️❤️. the seconds ticked on the wall clock your other roommate had gotten from her aunt. slowly, tears threatening to fall, you sent the message waiting to be sent.
lilly rushed to your side, holding you as you cried. your phone buzzed on the table.
hamnyangie
"hanbin, i really dont—" you choked out.
"did you mean it?" it was matthew. you almost dropped the phone, your heart clattering in your chest.
"matt." the name was a rotten whisper in your mouth. "you didnt call or text for 7 weeks. of...of course i meant it." a large part of you didn't.
"what can i do?" you could hear his voice break over the phone, and your heart shattered again.
"i don't know anymore." it was the truth. the first truth you had said in a while. "it hurts, matt. you called me on hanbin's phone??"
"i wasn't sure if you had blocked me," he murmured. "i was going to go see you or call or text during your finals, but the company..."
something in you clicked, something his sister had said about the company's behavior, and you bit the insides of your cheeks. you wanted to scream down the phone, half at him, half at his manager, but you held your tongue—for fear of making it worse.
“oh. matt…” lilly glared, holding out her hand, wanting to say a few choice words. sarah, your other roommate, walked in with groceries, and lilly’s boyfriend told her the situation. she glared at the phone in your hand.
“i know. im sorry. im so… i know there’s no apologies i can make that can make it better.” you heard whispers over the phone, hanbin shushing someone. “sorry, hold on. shut up, ricky,” he hissed to him, who laughed on the other side.
“i watched your content. i couldn’t bare not to.” you admitted, standing up, pacing around. matthew let out a small “yeah?”
“all i could look at was your photos. all i can think about is you. you plague my mind, yknow. in the best way possible.”
“did it hurt?” he hummed questioningly, “when i sent that message, when you couldn’t contact me?”
“yes, it hurt. like an eighteen wheeler hauling hardened cement. both.” your teeth ground together
“that’s how i feel. when you don’t text back, or you hang up almost immediately. i get it, sure, but it’s not fair. i deserve some time too, no?” you don’t know when the tears started falling, but there was no use stopping them, so you refused the tissues from sarah.
“i… i never…” he trailed off, a door shutting on his line.
“thought about it? yeah im sure you didnt, matt.” you didn’t mean to be so venomous, but this had been building up for so long.
“once you graduate…”
“this year? your contact isn’t even up, and you’ll continue with your other company.”
“i won’t be an idol after the contract is up.” you paused your pacing, and fell silent. “i have enough money for the both of us, and if you don’t like this…”
“matt, matt, what? no but you love it, and if it’s just because of me, i…i can’t ask you to…”
“honestly, this company sucked my joy. and if i can’t do it with these guys…” you smiled into the phone, remembering something hanbin’s younger sister had said when you saw her last in korea.
“don’t quit, but… promise you’ll talk to me more? please?” you heard a soft laugh, and you frowned.
“of course, yn, im sorry. im so sorry.”
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