#when it looks like u slept in ur makeup <3< /div> Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[macabrevampire]

ngl i love messy eyeshadow/mascara like anything grungey is soooo me

[ellabsprincess]

rowie seems super sweet! can u tell us ur favorite parts about her?

okay time for me to be very sappy and annoying, you asked for it!!

-> her eyes omfg!! she has the prettiest eyes ever istg. also she's so talented at like complicated makeup looks, and when she does like bright colored makeup and stuff like that i swear i fall to my knees immediately

-> her lips AHHHHH like she has the like fullest and prettiest lips ever. kissable lips for sure

-> i also love all her tattoos and piercings! they're very cute and i think they're hot :)

-> the way she makes me feel so so safe and validated! she believes in "no means no" and even if i consent to something at one point, i can always change my mind later. very very understanding, like if i'm uncomfortable or not in the right headspace, everything stops, and she's there to comfort me

-> she always praises my insecurities. especially bodily insecurities, like i was very shy to like do a face reveal to her and stuff like that in the beginning but she was so sweet! she literally compliments me like a million times a day, and when i send her photos, even if i look like a sewer rat, she always loves them and tells me i'm beautiful <33

-> her interests! we are kinda the opposite in terms of like career and academic interests essentially. like i'm super math and just general STEM focused, while she is super art and history focused. i've never really cared too much for art and history, but i swear i could listen to her talk about her interest for hours.

-> i also love just how easy it is to talk to her. like we message like 24/7 but last night i called her crying cause i just wasn't feeling my best. she immediately comforted me, and grounded me and made me feel so safe. we continued to talk for like 3 and a half hours i think, and then eventually i passed out cause i was very tired but she stayed on the call to make sure i was asleep :) then we just stayed on the call while we both slept and i think we were on the phone for like 9 hours or something. it's just so easy to be vulnerable around her, and i feel completely comfortable with her.

-> obviously there's like the sexual aspect of our relationship and i love that, but i also just love our like goofy fluffy moments too. like i have literally been crying laughing on voice memos with her like more times than i could count. like we will just talk about anything and no matter what it's a good conversation.

-> she also cares so much about like my personal well-being, and helps me take care of myself when i'm just not feeling good enough to do so. like if i'm having a really bad mental health day, she will be there for me to comfort me, and to also give me reminders to eat, and drink water and get good rest and stuff like that. just always making sure i'm okay.

this is very long at this point but those are just some of my favorite things about her :) i've been in a few relationships before her, but i've felt so safe or comfortable with someone before. she just gets me and i love having her as my person

@thelastofrowie

[trixabke]

Hi! Saw your matchups open and I was wondering if I could get a romantic matchup for HQ? I'm a 5'8-ish girl with Southeast Asian features though I would sometimes be mistaken as East Asian at certain angles. I have long, straight black hair but has like this natural wave at the bottom and dark brown eyes that look closer to black. A bit chubby, but I've been losing weight mostly for health reasons but it does affect what my body looks like (I've been successful thus far!!!). I wear glasses and usually have an alt sense of style, dark makeup, heavy eyeliner, almost all black clothing (ocassional white, navy, maroon, but mostly black). My pronouns are she/they and I'm bisexual male-leaning. I'm an INTP enneagram 5w6 tritype 539, my zodiac sign is Pisces, and my hobbies mostly fall on the artistic side of the scale like drawing, writing, some arts and crafts, but I also like maths (aiming to be an architect bc it's a combo of art and maths) and research (research includes personality types if you can't tell from me giving my mbti up to tritype). I prefer reading to watching because I get bored when I watch movies (I fell asleep during End Game, it was an accident). I'm a social introvert and I'm only talkative or loud when I'm comfortable in a situation, but my social battery drains fast. Most people say I'm cold and scarily professional the first time they meet me, not to mention unreadable (my facial expressions are,,, not too readable, they usually listen to the tone of my voice for clues), but people closest to me say I'm the chillest, most laid-back person with a funny sense of humour that can talk their ear off. I've only ever gotten angry twice in my life and people prefer to avoid pushing me that far bc they said I'm scary when I'm actually angry and not just irritated or annoyed, but they also avoid getting me irritated or annoyed bc they also say my glare is scary. An addition bc I think this may help, people probably don't know if I don't like them because I don't make aggressively snappy comments towards them or hint at it, I simply ignore their whole existence and move on. My ideal type would definitely be someone who at least has the same level of maturity as me or even more and a capable leader (I've always been one of the oldest people in my friend groups and I'm the oldest sibling so I had to lead and be in charge a lot, I don't like being in charge, I'm more of an advisor or right-hand man type of person), I would prefer someone who isn't too boisterous or obnoxious bc people like that drains my energy too much. I most definitely steer myself away from immature and childish people because it forces me into a role I don't want. Maybe someone loyal and understanding would be an ideal as well because well, those two are the bare minimum if I have to be honest. Last but not least in this long ass ask, my love language is mostly quality time with a mix of physical touch (I usually don't like being touched or touching other than people who I see in a romantic and intimate light). Wowhee this is longer than my to-do list for the next five years, hope this much information helps!! Be aware that I'm fasting and have only slept like 4 and a half hrs beforehand. Thank you in advance if you answer my ask! No pressure to get it done quickly. Stay hydrated and healthy!! (This is also one of the first times I'm sending an ask without anon on and I'm kinda,,, nervous lol).

HIII, this was like so sweet :) also, if ur cool w it, u should tell me more abt the tritype thing cuz when I googled it, it seemed really cool. I love the long asks; they literally bring a smile to my face, and I'm so happy u interacted dw u did perfect! NGL, I love ppl w glasses, so u have a soft spot in my heart now <3

(also, the how u guys met part is so long I'm sorry)

(romantic) I match you with...

akaashi:

you guys probably met at a party..like just:

ok so one of your friends probably had a rough day and really wanted to go to this party, and even though u were tired, u wanted to make them happy and caved

they promised to stay away from super huge crowds as a way of thanking you

bokuto happened to convince akaashi to go to that same party

akaashi doesn't really like parties much, but he goes to mediate boktuo

He probably is trying to find bokuto a bathroom (bless the poor man) and like walks into a room of you and your friend + a couple other ppl and is like, YOOO??

because to others, you might blend in, but in his eyes, you stand out

and as the door opens, your eyes move from the conversation to him like staring into the depths of his soul, and he is half scared but also like can't take his eyes off of you because he just thinks ur so perfect

is interrupted when bokuto comes up and jumps on akaashi and announces he did indeed find a place to piss!!

akaashi just leaves, but his mind keeps wandering back to u

then, like god was listening, he sees you sitting down listening to your friends talk and is like admiring you because you look so pretty listening to ur friends talk

ur friend prob notices u getting a little overwhelmed and lets u go back home and thanks u for spending time with them

BUT before you leave, bokuto asks your friend for their number

ok ik, this doesn't make sense, but like: bokuto is not very observant, BUT when his best friend looks, so content watching u (not in a creepy way istg), he knows what he has to do

texts ur friend later and sends akaashi's number to them and tells them to send it to you

ALTHOUGH- I see this as the night akaashi met you, like, something you don't remember but something he always will

u planned to meet up after a little bit, and one day, he just said he liked you, then u just didn't respond because what?? and then u text him a couple days later saying u like him back, and it becomes official (bokuto is really proud of himself for this and tells akaashi he owes him for being so great)

Akaashi has had to deal with bokuto a lot, but I think he enjoys being able to take care of people (don't get me wrong, he loves to be praised and have compliments, he may seem calm, but on the inside, it couldn't be more different)

he understands that u need someone to be there for you instead of you being there for everybody else

he also notices everything, the signs when your social battery is running low, when you start to feel stressed and back away, or after you have just had to be emotional or in a vulnerable situation and just need to be alone

he can tell anything just by the way you blink, no matter how expressive or unexpressive you are

he likes to think very logically as well and knows the right balance of emotion to bring in, especially with you, and when he makes a mistake, he learns from it

sorry from him really does mean sorry, and he will make an effort not to do that same thing again

he also really loves that you enjoy math, him being more of a literature person

it's like a really subtle thing, but in his head, the contrast is so cool [idk if u know what this is, but it's called the olive theory (if you don't, it should be on youtube; just search up like the olive theory from how I met your mother, there is a TikTok sound that has it w like music and I think that one matches the best) but I feel like to him it's that kind of energy, like something that doesn't mean a lot to others, but it's really special to him]

(plz ignore that I just wrote a whole fucking essay on that bullet; I just felt very strongly abt that)

also does really simple little acts for you

like washing your glasses when he gets up in the morning, but always washing them with hot water, so they feel nice and warm when you put them on

if he's at the store and remembers that your toothpaste was running low, he will buy you some

the dates would be pretty chill, probably just the 2 of you somewhere private

like, sitting outside and he's reading while you draw until it gets dark and then stargazing together

if he hears you talking about something a lot, he will probably try and plan it or buy it and surprise you

there is a baseline of maturity in your relationship you both really respect

just a comfortable, safe, and understanding relationship of you both trying to better yourself for each other!

.

.

Yours is so long, oml anyway. I really hope u liked this. I had a lot of fun writing this so ty for sending a rec, and if u see any spelling errors, no, u didn't :)

do not steal my work and claim it as your own

[vhsghostricks]

Hi hi hi hi Kyoko paints her nails under the gloves just so (according to her) “they’ll look nicer” (even if she’s the only one seeing them). But! Kyoko is not good at painting her nails so they’re very messy and uneven. Celeste somehow manages to view Kyoko’s hands before they’re dating and Celeste remarks about the nail polish. Kyoko explains to her very nervously and almost crying about it. Celeste just puts a hand on her cheek and says, “Kyoko, darling (/p but also like gay), you don’t need to hide this from me. How about I clean up your nails and we can use some of my nail polish? :)” This is when Kyoko realized that all the frustration and somewhat “obsession” she had towards Celeste wasn’t because she was highly doubtful and cautious of Celeste’s actions but because she was madly in love with her.

ALSO! I know you hc Maki as a Celesgiri bby but consider,,, Maki as a Mahipeko bby. I like to hc that Peko dyes her hair silver but it’s naturally black so it makes sense. BUT IMAGINE, Mahiru holding the Maki bby for the first time and being like “wow,,, two Pekos!” Cold attitude, black hair, red eyes, knows how to kill people, reserved nature, just a little Peko 💖 ALSO MAKI WITH LIGHT FADED FRECKLES AJSHHSJAHAHAHAHA

You said you liked Sondam a lot too so uh Sonia has two dads (there are two kings of Novoselic). And they’re very protective of Sonia so she’s very nervous when Gundham is going to meet them for the first time BUT THEY ABSOLUTELY LOVE HIM THEY THINK THEYRE SO NICE AND SWEET AND PERFECT FOR THEIR DAUGHTER. Also since it’s likely canon that Gundham didn’t have a dad growing up points at him fatherless behavior /j the prospect of having two dads now (as soon as they find out Gundham grew up without one they were immediately like “you can call us dad if you want to :)”) is kind of overwhelming for him but tbh he feels really happy and almost excited about it.

Last but not least, Sayaka confessed to Mukuro that she was in love with him at some party Junko was having at the twins’ place as Mukuro was holding her hair as she threw up in Mukuro’s bathroom. She had had a a couple drinks and had a really nasty anxiety attack so Mukuro took her to her bedroom to help her get away from everything. Sayaka ended up staying the night in Mukuro’s bed while Mukuro slept on the floor. “Slept” cuz Mukuro couldn’t sleep after what Sayaka had told her. When Mukuro notices Sayaka wake up, she immediately blurts out “H-hey you told me last night that you were in love with me is it true or were you just having the worst night of your life and didn’t really know what you were saying?” Sayaka tells her that it was genuine (even though she wasn’t quite ready to tell her).

Ok actual last one but Enonami: Junko likes to hold and hug Chiaki on her lap and laugh evilly like those James Bond villains that would always be stroking a cat as they laughed evily

Ok goodnight and I just wanna tell u ur so cool and ur such an amazing artist ur art gives me so much life :3

YYYYEEEEESSSSSSSSSS SCREAMS

Celeste has probably showed Kyoko all of her makeup and tried to find a color Kyoko likes ... After the first time, Celeste just stares at her hands, making sure the polish is dry, and ends up tracing every mark. She eventually let's go, calls her lovely, and Kyoko is pretty much at a loss for words <3

LOVE FAMILY HCS, Maki Mahipeko bby .... so cute so cute. ALSO YEAH i draw Peko with black roots a lot cuz i have the same hc :) !!! Also Mahiru talking about how their eyes so similar and Peko atarts getting worried abt Maki following the path she did... wahh i like this idea

OH MY GOD SONIA HAVING TWO DADS ... that's cute, yknow that thing where the parents say "oh! my daughter talks about you so much!" and their daughter gets embarrassed n stuff and their partner is embarrassed but happy... yeah that's the vibe im getting <3

YESSS Mukuro was so worried and anxious abt how their friendship would be now that she knows (even though she still doubts that it was real).... Only to be affirmed when Sayaka wakes up <3 I think afterwards, she'd start thanking Mukuro for watching over her ofc, and probably ask her out on a smol date since Mukuro knows.

HELP Chiaki just playing mario while Junko is talking abt the 500 different ways she could end the world... Chiaki eventually snuggles into her and is like 'you probably could, but don't do that, dork."

OK aaaa thank u sm !!!! loved all of these, sorry it took me forever to reply adghjkkhgfsag ty again for the compliment, im glad u like my art whwhw :D

[baekhvuns]

HI HI HIIIIII OMG i havent been here in a wHILE jve been so busy with school since the school year's about to end soon BUT OMGGG HOW HAVE U BEEN MISS BAEKVHUNS

ALSO SEONGHWA LEGO LIVEEE the day he did the live jwkdkwks pls i wa ssuch in a bad mood😭 i slept literally 5 mins before he started the live then woke up right when jt ended MY FUCKINF HEART SGATTERED I WAS WAITING FOR MONTHS FOR HIM TO DO A LEGO LIVE AND I JUST SLEPT😭

nothing much really happened with my life, was just taking a break from socmed again^^ it felt good too JSJZHAHHAHA just wanted to come back here and say im alive😗✌

ALSO FUCKING HELL THE CONCERT DVD THING OMG THE PHOTOS OF ATEEZ CRYING MADE MY HEART SHATTER INTO ITTY BITTTY PIECES

esp sannie😭 that sweet little kitten baby honeybunch pumpkin buttercup apple of my eye

anyways

GODDAMN WOOYOUNGS ARMS choke m-AHA jk jk or am i

also that pjoto of sannie doing a peace sign infront of the merry go round fucking jell his tiddies,, theyre HUGE

and also mingi my sweet baby angel apparently hes allergic to the eye make up theyve been using on him? but he said hes fine so HES FINE :D his eye gets swollen n stuff is what i read,, i got too lazy to read their universe messages pls i just keep on sleeping and doing extra schoolwork

also never thought id see the day liam payne(is that the spelling idk not too bothered to check) would be the main topic in those tea drama channels on youtube😭

anYWAYS HOPE UR DAY IS GOING WELL, STAY SAFE AND HEALTHY ALWAYS!!💗

-🍤

omg hi shrimp 😭😭

HI HI HIIIIII OMG i havent been here in a wHILE jve been so busy with school since the school year's about to end soon BUT OMGGG HOW HAVE U BEEN MISS BAEKVHUNS

HI HI HELLO NO WORRIES I HOPE UR SCHOOLS DOING GOOD !!! <333

ALSO SEONGHWA LEGO LIVEEE the day he did the live jwkdkwks pls i wa ssuch in a bad mood😭 i slept literally 5 mins before he started the live then woke up right when jt ended MY FUCKINF HEART SGATTERED I WAS WAITING FOR MONTHS FOR HIM TO DO A LEGO LIVE AND I JUST SLEPT😭

HE DID AND HE LOOKED SO CUTE PLS 😭😭😭😭 NAURRRRRRR HE WILL DO MORE YOULL BE AWAKE THEN FOR SURE no bc it was 3 hours long dont worry u missed absolutely nothing,,, he was very concentrated and patient was so surprised FBAMDHSK HEY SLEEP BEFORE THE MAN

nothing much really happened with my life, was just taking a break from socmed again^^ it felt good too JSJZHAHHAHA just wanted to come back here and say im alive😗✌ ALSO FUCKING HELL THE CONCERT DVD THING OMG THE PHOTOS OF ATEEZ CRYING MADE MY HEART SHATTER INTO ITTY BITTTY PIECES

omg i hope that went good!!! no bc ur major blows me away like how are u this smart 😭😭😭😭 BDKWHDK THE DVDS ARE HUGE AND THE PICTURES 😭😭🤚🏼 THE PC’S I WILL ROB 😭😭😭

esp sannie😭 that sweet little kitten baby honeybunch pumpkin buttercup apple of my eye,, anyways

i agree so much. so much, it hurts.

GODDAMN WOOYOUNGS ARMS choke m-AHA jk jk or am i also that pjoto of sannie doing a peace sign infront of the merry go round fucking jell his tiddies,, theyre HUGE

HEY HEY HEY ITS TIME TO STOP FBWKDHKWHDKW

and also mingi my sweet baby angel apparently hes allergic to the eye make up theyve been using on him? but he said hes fine so HES FINE :D his eye gets swollen n stuff is what i read,, i got too lazy to read their universe messages pls i just keep on sleeping and doing extra schoolwork

OH NOO 😭😭😭😭😭 time to hunt the makeup brand down 🔫 YEAH HES FINE HE IS !!! no bc the sight of him like that would be so cute 😭😭😭 no bc me too my sleep has increased so much it’s crazy but it feels good ☺️

also never thought id see the day liam payne(is that the spelling idk not too bothered to check) would be the main topic in those tea drama channels on youtube😭

LMFAOOOO FBWKFHKWHDKW I WAS NEVER A LIAM GIRL (or a directioner) ZAYN FOREVER 😭😭😭 liam in payne forever now fbwkdhwk so crazy he just came out and ratted them out for what 😭😭 keep it to urself pls <3

anYWAYS HOPE UR DAY IS GOING WELL, STAY SAFE AND HEALTHY ALWAYS!!💗

I HOPE UR WELL TOO SHRIMP !!!! pls take care bc that socmed 😀😀😀 sleep and drink lots of water pls and thank u <3

[terushimas-n1-hater]

Airport fun

How i think flying with sugawara would be like

Character(s): sugawara koushi

Genre: fluff, mabye crack

Warnings: I guess flying on a plane 😐

An: as a person who travels almost every year, I thought this is a fun idea of like how travelling with suga is like :) this is pretty long so uh yeah

Masterlist.🏐

@. ALL CREDITS GOES TO SHOTOSIMP2, DO NOT REPOST ONLY LIKE, AND/OR REBLOG THANK YOU.

• Lets get into itt!!

• lets say that this flight would be in the early morning

• okay I know sugawara would wake you up at like a reasonable time like 3-4 hours before the flight

• like that you both have time to take a shower, eat breakfast pretty quickly then go

• also sugawara would NOT let you pack your stuff at the day of the flight

• like it has to be one or two days before the flight

• he does that to prevent getting late and to have time for yourselves

• if you're like me and you just cant for the love of god sit in one place and pack all your shit

• he's here!! He would help you and mabye even tell you to do something else while he does it for you 😫

• after he's done with you're bag he would ask you if he did anything wrong since there is shows/makeup just general stuff that might ruin clothes

• I also feel like he would watch those "BEST packing tips and hacks 2020"

• if you do use makeup and you put it in same bag as your clothes he would put like?? Plastic thing on top of the clothes and then put the makeup on top so if it spills it doesn't ruin ur clothes.

• its the next morning sugawara already set a bath for your cute ass tehe. Also made breakfast LIKE?? BRO STOP BEING SO HOT ☹

• OKAY so everything is done ur both ready its time to go

• he's the type to go to the airport with his car and park it there and when he comes back he comes back home using hes car that he parked there, so you're both in the car listening to music opened windows and holding hands plz yall cute asf

• OKAY BUT YOU CANT TELL ME SUGA ISNT THE TYPE TO PUT HIS HAND ON YOUR THIGH WHEN DRIVING

• okay here is the fun part

• you and suga arrive ant the airport and you took your bags out of the car and put on the bag holder thing that you move around IDK WHAT ITS NAME OKAY BARE WITH ME

• you go inside this is the 4 time suga had told you to check the passport and the tickets lmao

• when you're both done with all of the passport situation thing and your now both empty handed and all you have to do is wait for the plane

• there is a tiny problem tho

• the plane is going to arrive IN TWO HOURS

• and you both have separated seats on the fucking plane

• suga was kinda freaking out because wtf what if you sit next to some creepy dude?!? Like he knows you can fight and all but he just cant bare the thought

• you calmed him down telling him that its okay and we could tell someone when we DO get on the plane

• because you're main concern is not about if u two sit next to each other or not, its THAT YOU HAVE TO WAIT 2 HOURS TO ACTUALLY GO ON THE PLANE

• You both sit there for a sec and just start to giggle a bit lmao

• okay okay

• You and suga start to go around in these like stores in the airport yk?

• And yall just look at the all the candy and that is so expensive for no fucking reason

• Sugawara is literally laughing at you because you stood there for 10 minutes on and off about how the only chocolate the sell is so expensive

• "😠"

• "💀✋"

• He told if you want it that bad he wouldn't mind buying the box of chocolate for you, And he did

• for "fun" in his words

• And the chocolate tasted like fucking SHIT

• ITS SO BAD DOES NOT HAVE ANY SUGAR ITA JUST CHOCOLATE AND LIKE BARELY ANY SUGAR BRO. DRY NOT EVEN SWEET AND KINDA SALTY LMAOO HELP

• rich people chocolate basically

• AND HE'S JUST LAUGHING HIS HEAD OFF HE CANT KEEP IT IN ANYMORE

• You both didn't know what to do with this hella expensive chocolate box. Like none of you liked it that would be a waste of money

• And sugawara thought it would be better if we give it to A STRANGER on the airport

• Just like that 😕

• He took the box and went to someone that was sitting in a cafe and said hey heres this its a gift. He hands the man a box of fucking chocolate that doesn't even taste like chocolate

• LAMOOO THE MAN THOUGHT IT WAS GOIMG TO KILL HIM BECAUSE IT DOES NOT TASTE LIKE A CHOCOLATE ITS 4:39 IM LINGFIELD SO HARD AT THIS I CANT

• so ya!! You and suga go around more lil candy stores and got like gummy bears and lollipops bc y not

• SO MANY PEOPLE LOOKED AT YALL LIKE THEY HAVE NEVER SEEN GROWN UPS EAT CANDY AND HOLD HANDS EVERRR ITS SO FUNNY

• for my fem readers and anyone with boobies and or ass

• um 😐

• LMAOO when yall were buying candy this dude was trying to hit on u okay AND HE THOUGHT..THAT YOU BUYING CANDY WAS FOR YOUR?? KID?? (There was a kid next to u guys so he thought it was yours)

• SO THAT DUDE CAME UP TO YOU SAYING "ayooo didnt know we have nice milfs in our area..aha 😩" "MILF?" And the problem is sugawara was no fuckin help HE WAS LAUGHING 🤥

• they guy got embarrassed and LEFT AGAGHAHAHA

• okay done for this part

• but yeah you guys eat the candy he also got smothies too!!

• when you were both done you checked the time to see that you both have 50 minutes until the your plane arrives

• and suga thought it would be better to head to the waiting room since less people would be there

• you both were sitting on the chairs where the big windows are in front of them, you could see bags getting transferred and planes.

• you rested you head on sugawaras shoulder, pulling out your phone and headphones giving sugawara the left and you got the right

• you two were sitting looking at the view while listening to 505 (arctic monkeys) sugawara put his right hand around your waist pulling you closer to him

• you could her the whispers and 'aww's from old granny's that were sitting on the other side

• sugawara was rubbing his hand on your waist, he still hasn't realised that you fell asleep.

• when he did, he smiled to himself he moved to kiss the crown of your head until he woke you up by accident

• he told you everything is fine and that you should go back to sleep. he gently pushed you so your head could reach his thighs, before you did you looked around still not alot of people are around so you felt more comfortable

• you rested your head on his lap he starts to smile and play with your head making you fall asleep again.

• you were woken up by sugawaras gentle voice telling you that its time to wake up. You looked around there were more people in the waiting room than before you slept, you looked at sugawara he was smiling at you

• when you got yourself together again you asked suga when its time to get going he said after 10 minutes. You looked in your bag making sure everything is there

• when you closed your bag again you moved around to see sugawara smiling softly while staring at you "your so cute"

• sugawara was talking to the flight attendants asking them if they can change the seats, where they accepted and helped you two get in your shared seats (yes its that easy sometimes)

• God he looks so cute sleeping on your lap like that, his eyes shut with his mouth just open a bit.

• you're playing with his hair, while watching the movie on the mini TV infront of you

• there were a group of girls that sat next to you, and every now and then they would glance at the two of you- actually they were looking at suga

• even one of them wanted to make a conversation with him earlier, but you ignored it all

• although you knew that sugawara koushi, your husband wouldn't hurt your feelings like that

• because the moment he saw the discomfort of your face he immediately tried to end the flirty conversation.

• plus none of the girls were even his type LMAOAOA

[gwoongi]

acts of love

bts / reader, all members / reader genre: best friends au, fluff + crack rating: general words: 9.6k warnings: platonic relationships, smoking, so much fluff you might need to book an appointment with ur dentist for tomorrow morning ASAP a/n: if u want 2 be bts’ best friend, raise ur hand *thousands of hands raise*. this fic fuels my genuine need to be their bff. i saw this post last night + wrote this immediately. hope u love it like i do :D 

➸ As long as you’ve got a good group of friends, anything is possible. Thankfully, you’ve got the best group you could ever ask for.

(01) taking pics of ur friends without them asking u to bc they looked so pretty in that exact moment

“Well, at least the views not so bad. Honestly, I thought it would be a lot worse.”

Beside you, at the top of the bleachers that surround the large football pitch below, Taehyung huffs and kicks his feet up onto the empty row in front of him. It would be easy to just move rows, considering the game’s due to start in ten minutes time, and there’s plenty of empty seats closer. But, he’s bought these seats, and by the looks of things, Yoongi and Hoseok are already comfortable where they are, sharing a big bag of sticky popcorn between them. Casting a look to the right, you notice that Sana and Seunghee are making their way up, dressed in jerseys and caps, and you suddenly feel very out of place.

“Tell me why I came again?” you ask, not looking away from the pitch below. The grass is bright green, and every wandering body down on the pitch is just a small speck.

“Because,” Taehyung starts, unlocking his phone and checking his messages. You snoop- one missed text from Jeongguk and two off his Mom, which makes you smile. Taehyung’s always been a Mommy’s boy. “You love me, and you know that I worked my ass off for two whole months saving up for these tickets. And, since Jimin’s sick and couldn’t come, you decided to be a good friend and take his place.”

With a frown, you look back towards Taehyung. “I don’t know shit about football.”

“Cheer when we do,” Taehyung suggests honestly.

Yoongi perks up, patting your arm roughly. “Do what I do, and cheer for the team with the prettier uniform.”

“Don’t!” Taehyung hisses, grabbing you back. “The other team have a prettier uniform, but if you cheer for them on this side of the stadium, you’re going to get mobbed. Hey, Yoongi, don’t tell her that, she doesn’t know any better.”

“Just football,” Yoongi shrugs.

“Just football…” Taehyung scoffs and shrinks back down in his seat.

You laugh quietly, petting Taehyung’s leg with faux sympathy. As you move your body to glance around the stadium, strangely anticipating the start of the match, a flash out the corner of your eye makes you look over in Hoseok’s general direction. Hoseok holds his phone up, taking a photo, and then smiles as he checks it on the screen.

“Jung Hoseok, delete it now!” you gape, realising what he’s done. “Oh my God, I bet I look so ugly...you could have warned me.”

“Sorry,” he laughs sheepishly. He then shows you the screen, “you looked pretty! And it’s your first live match ever, we had to document it. Yoongi, look. Wow...I’m sending this to Jimin for proof that you’re having fun.”

“What if I’m not having fun?” you ask.

He glances up, “you are.”

Well. If he says so.

(02) randomly giving tiny gifts (a comic book that ur friend likes, a heart-shaped piece of paper with a sweet message on it)

“Can anybody here share the exact chemistry behind Elephant Toothpaste?”

Chemistry is the absolute bane of your life. It’s only been a few weeks, and you’re already regretting taking additional classes in it. Technically, it was Jimin’s fault you were here in the first place. If it wasn’t for the fact that Jimin was afraid of enrolling into classes alone and therefore had guilted you into taking advanced chemistry with him, then you wouldn’t be here. You sigh for the fourth time in the last ten minutes and shove your chin into the palm of your hand. The clock above Professor Han’s head seems to be still, taunting you with zero movements.

Can boredom kill you? You wonder about that, letting your mind wander as Professor Han continues to quiz the front two rows on the exact chemical formula of the affectionately named Elephant Toothpaste. You’re so close to finding the answer when you feel somebody poking your upper arm. The finger that pokes belongs to Jimin, and you angle your head to look at him with a questioning glare.

Jimin smiles, his hair falling into his face. Like you, he rolled out of bed this morning and tried his best to look semi-presentable; if you counted borderline pajama wear and a serious case of bed-head to be presentable and acceptable for a 9am lecture. Jimin says nothing, just smiles and pushes something towards you with two fingers. The sound of the paper sliding towards you brings your gaze down, and as you look away to stare at it, Jimin returns his attention to Professor Han. Bare in mind, his notebook is empty, save doodles of Yewon on the front row, occasionally losing focus and staring around the room for long periods of time.

What Jimin has pushed before you is a small little piece of paper, smoothly cut into a heart shape. Now the sound of scissors makes sense… It’s just scrap paper from the back of his notebook, decorated with tiny stars and circles, a pathetic hand drawn galaxy on the front like a book cover. You slowly pick it up, more interested in this than the lecture. You turn it over curiously, your heart thumping endearingly and a smile picking up on your face as you read what he’s written on the back.

you and me have some serious chemistry. love u

Jimin refuses to make eye contact again. He’ll say something along the lines of, “you’re taking it too seriously” when you’ll no doubt ask him about it later, but really, Jimin’s just a softie, with the sudden need to tell his friends that he loves them. You’re not complaining.

(03) handwritten letters with cute stickers

Something’s been left in your shared kitchen, something with your name on it and closed in an envelope with a small Gudetama sticker. You set your cup of tea to the side, sliding up onto a stool near the breakfast bar to read it. The front is in a bold font, in handwriting you don’t really recognise. Careful of the time and effort put into the appearance, you carefully open the envelope and take out the contents.

Y/N

Good morning. I hope you slept okay - when I came home last night after judo, you were actually passed out on the couch in the common room so I piggy backed you up to your room. Hehe, your room is so dirty though...I think I definitely tripped over a plug that connected your fairylights, so sorry if that doesn’t work anymore. Anyway. I left this morning and left you some nice tea and some tablets (Yoongi said that I should put them in your bathroom, so I literally just left them on your sink). I know you haven’t been having a fun time with midterms and you need to take care of yourself! If you get too sick and can’t do anything, then how will we eat?? You’re our uni mom!!! We need to live too!!!!! D:

I also rented out Harry Potter for later. I know you get really sad and lonely when you’re stressed out, and so we can watch it together when I’m home after my shift at work :D

Hehe, feel better <3 Just remember that Jeonggukie loves you!!!

Drink tea and stay warm :)

Lots of love, Jeongguk :D

The paper is signed with Jeongguk’s messy handwriting, like he ran out of time as he was writing it. The page is littered with tiny Gudetama stickers and the sight of it makes you smile. Along with other little notes Jeongguk’s left for you over the last few months, this one earns a spot on your cork board above your desk.

(04) remembering what ur friend likes or dislikes

You were so late.

Almost getting run over by a bus in the process, you sprint across the small road that separates your flat and the University central campus, missing a deep puddle as you step up off the road and onto the pavement. It pours, your hair soaked and makeup no doubt running and staining your cheeks. Holy fuck, you were so late.

Every Friday, without fail, Flat 6 (aka the large and slightly stinky flat you share with two of your best friends) host an annual movie night, inviting literally all of your extended friendship group which definitely is not allowed, but who cares? You noticed Namjoon’s car pulled up in the car park next door and curse again, knowing you’re the last one to arrive to a movie night you’re technically hosting.

You rush up the stairs, since the elevator is still down for maintenance, and burst into the flat with an announcing groan. From somewhere in the living room, Jeongguk looks up with happy surprise and jumps up off the couch, approaching the hall.

“Y/N! You made it.”

You wince, smiling as you hang up your coat to drip dry on the mat near the door. “Yep. I made it. To my own movie night. That I’m technically helping host.”

“No sweat,” Jeongguk shrugs. “It’s okay. Here, I’ll dump your bag in the closet. Get changed, I think Yoongi’s still preparing snacks, anyway.”

“Okay. Thanks, Jeonggukie.”

He gushes, smiling and raising his shoulders cutely. “It’s okay, Y/N.”

Jeongguk swiftly takes your bag from your clutches, faking the weight with the droop of his knees just to hear you laugh, and then he turns to shuffle down the hall to quite literally toss it into the shared storage closet. You’re not too worried; on days like today, in which you have one 1 hour seminar to attend at 5pm and nothing else, there’s nothing inside your bag worthy of being broken by Jeongguk throwing it to the ground. As he does this, you shudder out of your shoes and make your way to your bedroom, to change into something warm and comfortable for the movie.

The sound of laughter makes you hurry to change, one leg out of your damp and cold jeans whilst simultaneously fishing for some old jogging bottoms out of your bottom draw, a jumper from Yoongi that he thought he lost left for you to grab on your bed. What he doesn’t know and will find out in five minutes won’t hurt him. (Yoongi also doesn’t care, because he’s a whipped best friend who lets you do what you want, including steal clothes he actually needs and can’t really afford to replace. Oh well, sharing is caring!).

Your hair is still soaked, and you move towards the single bathroom squeezed between two bedrooms to ring it out in the sink. Once you’re done, and your hair is thrown up into a scrunchie-decorated pony, you pace back towards the kitchen where, rightly so, Yoongi stands with his back facing you, filling up a glass with Pepsi.

“I thought we threw that shit out,” you announce as you walk in. “You know this flat is Team Coca Cola, those are the rules.”

Yoongi sighs, not looking up. “Yeah, I know, but Namjoon is a monster.”

“He’s so annoying...why can’t he just admit that Coca Cola is better?” you sigh, moving towards Yoongi to see the small bowls of snacks he has ready to be taken into the living room. It’s full in there, people stuffed onto the sofas and the floor where a bed of blankets lies like a mattress.

Yoongi’s outdone himself; the bowls are neatly organised by colour and ingredient, and you smile. Yoongi was a lot of things, one of them a secret perfectionist. Even when it concerned bowls of snacks. God, you love to love him.

“Namjoon’s a man of unpopular opinions, I mean, he really thinks the live action of Attack on Titan is good, like, who actually thinks that?” Yoongi rants, and then he glances to the side towards you, is silent for a moment, and then asks, “is that my jumper?”

You look down at it with a smile. “Yep. It’s comfy.”

Yoongi hums, like he’s bored. “Whatever, looks better on you than it did on me. Who the fuck lied to me and told me dark green was my colour...?”

“Every colour is your colour,” you say, patting his back and reaching for the bowls. “Should I take these in?”

Yoongi then nods, humming again. “Yeah. Yellow bowl is for you, by the way.”

You look to it. “And why is that?”

“Cause I know you don’t like the barbeque flavour chips that are in the red bowl, but everyone else does, so I went out and got you the salty ones. Oh, and there’s a bar of Galaxy in the fridge. Don’t tell Jeongguk, cause he’ll get pissy about how I didn’t get him something.”

As Yoongi tells you this, your heart flutters. You had told him that when you first met, after he offered you some of his chips noticing you were the only person not eating.

“You remembered that?” you wonder, and Yoongi looks at you like you’ve lost your mind.

“I’m a good friend,” he states, as though it were obvious. “Don’t get it twisted, though. I only did it because I don’t want to hear you complaining about it all night.”

You’re sure that’s a lie, but if it makes him feel better, you’ll accept it. You’ll also ignore the embarrassed tinge of red on his cheeks.

(05) inside jokes

[15:16PM] jeongguk: alright fuckers 🔪😡 [15:16PM] jeongguk: who left the kitchen window open all damn night [15:17PM] jeongguk: there’s three spiders in the sink and it rained so the work surface is all wet [15:17PM] jeongguk: [1 Image Attached] not happy bois [15:23PM] jine: i dont even live with you why are you asking the gc this [15:24PM] jeongguk: yoongi has the flat gc muted and idk how else to yell at him [15:28PM] y/n: blame me,,,,i have failed u,,,,,,,im sowwy [15:29PM] jeongguk: hehe its ok ❣️💘💕💓 i’ll clean it up 🥰 [15:32PM] haseul: eye….. [15:39PM] jimin: YALL LMAOODIUGJFKDSLJ [15:39PM] jimin: guess what TF just happened in my maths class [15:41PM] jimin: i forgot that on one of my assignments me and y/n had drawn a camel in the library on the back and he saw and asked me 2 stay behind after class so he could have stern words with me or smthn…..anyway so i go to the front of the class at the end and he’s like “mr park what the hell is this camel doing here” [15:42PM] jimin: and i said sir thats not a camel [15:42PM] jimin: thats my WIFE [15:43PM] y/n: HA HA HA… [15:45PM] yoongi: IF YALL DONT STOP [15:47PM] taehyung: THIS IS THE THIRD TIME YOU’VE MADE THIS REFERENCE AND I DONT KNOW WHAT IT MEANS [15:47PM] taehyung: this inside joke stinks….someone explain to me please what this means 😭😭😭 [15:48PM] hoseok: i hate this damn gc

(06) long phone calls

[Incoming Facetime Call From: Seokjin 👪]

“Hey.”

“Hey. Y/N, are you sitting down because I have some major tea on Professor Kwon and Professor Kim and I’m not supposed to be saying anything and it’s killing me.”

“Oh shit.” Audio shuffles. “I’m lying down now, bitch. Tell me everything.”

“Okay. So…”

[Five Hours Later]

“I’m still in shock about Kwon and Kim.”

“Me too. What’s Kim gonna do, lie and say she had heat rash on her titties?”

“Hopefully she doesn’t get them out for people to see.”

“Literally. God, I hate how our life has resorted to teacher gossip. Are we those students?”

“Yup. Two students bitching about teachers at...like ...midnight?”

“Oh, shit, it’s midnight already??”

(07) facetiming while ur both doing something else (study dates like that are on another level of intimacy)

Jimin’s had the same cold for about two weeks now, and nobody knows what the hell’s up with it. He walks around his flat, according to Hoseok, wrapped up in a blanket and surrounded by a necklace of matted tissues. To be honest, it’s not as bad as he’s making it out to be, but he’s a guy, and so anything that involves a slight stomach pain and a blocked nose instantly translates to man flu, which is almost as bad as the plague.

That being said, Jimin’s set himself under “house arrest” and is therefore glued to his bed or desk chair, still managing to move his sore and aching joints to write a few words on his lab report. With the first round of finals creeping up, Jimin actually wants to go to the library, but, man, what with his man flu and everything, he just can’t seem to do it.

On the other hand, he has you to set the mood for him. After snagging a corner table in the library near the big windows, you make a barrier out of your bag and books to watch the sunset, Taehyung opposite using minimal space with his laptop and headphones, watching a documentary he’ll need to cite for his essay. Jeongguk naps next to you, having exhausted himself from his shift last night that ran into the early hours and Sana secretly paints her nails, blowing them dry as she takes a break from writing.

Once you’re settled and comfortable, you reluctantly peel away the slice of tape covering your webcam (because Black Mirror has forever scared you into thinking 4Chan are watching you and will hold your endless hours of Games2Girls dot com against you) and open up Facetime, ringing Jimin who waits patiently back home.

After a few rings, Jimin’s bright and tired face pops up on the screen and you both silently wave. Jimin has his mic muted, but yours is on, allowing the ambience of the library trick Jimin into believing he’s actually there. It’s not quite like an ordinary study date, but for now, it’ll do. He opens his textbook and starts to work, comfortable and happy now that he’s listening to his friends discuss work, like he’s there. He smiles, occasionally glancing up to see your face working or Jeongguk unintentionally leaning into frame. It’s comforting. He works well.

(08) cooking something for ur friend

“Merry Christmas, Tae. Oh, wait, I have something for you.”

Taehyung is hosting a Christmas party this year, in the apartment he shares with some of the girls in your group and Namjoon. His flat is lit up with lights, draining the electricity, the tree sparkling like diamonds in the front living room that looks out onto the Seoul city. The sound of Michael Bublé sings out festively and Taehyung leads you through to the kitchen, out of the loud madness of the party that’s getting into full swing. In one hand, you have a big bag of presents that both Jeongguk and Yoongi kindly left for you to haul all by yourself to Taehyung’s flat, and in the other, you balance a box across your arm, the corner sharp on your inner elbow.

“Cool. Your gift is under the tree,” Taehyung says.

“Oh, yeah. No, this is an early gift.”

“Just for me?” he asks.

You set down the box. “Well, you can share if you love us all a lot. But, it’s for you.”

Taehyung wastes no time in opening the box, a smile widening across his face as he reviews the contents. The box is stuffed full with cookies, baked big and crumbly for his tasty pleasures. They’re decorated too, because you love him so much and you know he liked them last year.

“Last year you ate nearly all of my batch, so I just decided to make you some of your own this year,” you tell him casually. It’s really no big deal, but Taehyung feels like he might actually cry because the thought is so sweet. You notice this, the glassiness of your eyes. “Ew, don’t cry.”

“I’m sorry, I’m touched!” he exclaims. Taehyung turns on his spot and wraps an arm around your neck, pulling you in for a hug. With your arms wrapped around his torso, Taehyung smiles with a thrilled sound and kisses the crown of your head. “Thanks, Y/N, you’re the best.”

“Yeah, yeah. I know.”

(09) sending texts when u randomly think abt them

[11:15AM] namjoon 👨🏼‍🚀: i stopped by at kyobo’s today and found a cards against humanity add on pack that was harry potter themed and i thought of u lol [11:15AM] namjoon 👨🏼‍🚀: i bought it for u btw 😊

(10) listening without judging

When the front door slams shut, you know that something’s wrong.

Having opted for sitting in the natural light of the living room to finish your lab report, the sound of the door echoes loudly throughout the empty house. It’s only you home, since Yoongi has volleyball practise until six this evening, which means it’s Jeongguk who’s home and apparently, not in a very good mood.

Jeongguk doesn’t realise you’re in the living room until he enters it, stopping suddenly in the doorway when he sees you cross-legged on the carpet near the coffee table. His eyes are red and swollen, his nose shiny from where he’s been crying and sniffling. The sight makes your stomach churn with an indescribable feeling, and you immediately rise to your feet.

“Jeongguk? What’s wrong- did something happen?” you ask him, not stepping forward until you know he’s okay. 

Jeongguk’s sensitive, the baby of the friendship group, and sometimes you forget to go easy on him. He sighs loudly and drops his backpack to the floor with a thud. His books curl inside loudly and he drags his feet across the floor to get to the couch. He moves as if he’s going to sit down and then stops, turning to you. His bottom lip curls like he’s about to cry, and then he opens his arms for a hug. You immediately move forward.

“Oh, Jeonggukkie,” you coo, stroking his hair and moving to sit on the sofa. Jeongguk comes down with you and you rest his head on top of your breasts, granting him this once in a lifetime opportunity and he doesn’t even register it. He just cries, loudly and comfortably, his arms around you as he sobs. “Oh, my baby. What happened?”

Jeongguk hiccups. “Do-Doesn’t matter. It’s dumb.”

“No, it’s not. Something hurt your feelings, and your feelings aren’t dumb,” you tell him seriously. Stroking the hair out of his face, you peer down at him. “Come on. Tell me, I won’t judge or tell anybody else. You can trust me.”

He sniffs loudly, but you don’t cringe. He blinks, tears falling and he embarrassingly wipes the tears away, nodding. “Okay.” And then the words come out like vomit.

“I just. You know how I liked Sooyoung, right? Well, we were talking- everyone knows we were, but still, we were talking, and I just really liked her and wanted her to like me. I did all this stuff for her, planned all these dates and got her flowers. I thought she liked flowers, girls like flowers. I know we joke that you’re one of the guys, but even you liked those flowers I got for you. So, I got her this pretty necklace with an S on it and was going to give it to her and so I went to her practise room. She does dance, you knew she does dance, right? Yeah. And so I went to the room and was in the room talking to her when the door opens and this guy comes in and he comes up to her and they kiss and I just. She. She told me she didn’t want to rush into dating and that she liked me, and then she suddenly started dating someone else and I’m just really hurt and confused. Did I do something wrong? Am I ugly? Am I annoying, I just...I don’t know what I did. I really liked her.”

You don’t say anything as he talks. You just listen intently, nodding against his head with a low hum and stroking his hair gently.

“I know it’s silly and stupid that I’m crying over a girl, it’s just…” He sighs. “It hurts.”

You sigh, too. “It’s not silly and stupid. What Sooyoung did was really shitty and it’s natural that it hurt your feelings. You did absolutely nothing wrong, though. The flowers were pretty, and you didn’t force her into anything, and you were so kind and patient. Any girl would be lucky enough to have you as a boyfriend. Sooyoung missed out! You’re so good, Jeongguk, one of the best guys I know. And you’re not ugly! That’s an insult to actual ugly people! If you’re ugly, then what are we?” He laughs shyly and you smile, “Huh? What are we?”

“Okay, sorry,” Jeongguk laughs, pressing his cheek into your torso with a wide smile. His hands loop together behind your back, meek and timid, and he sighs, this time less sadly. “Maybe I’m destined to be alone forever…”

“You’re being dramatic, now,” you sigh. “The right person is waiting for you. Just give it some time.”

Jeongguk thinks about that for a moment. “Wanna date me if I end up alone and single aged thirty?”

Loudly, you let out a laugh. “Yeah right. You know what, fine. Even though I know you won’t be, if we’re both single by thirty, I’ll marry you. How about that?”

Jeongguk hums. “Cool. Is it safe to have kids after thirty?”

You let out a wheeze, taken aback by Jeongguk’s question. “Woah there. I said I’d marry you, not birth your children! Besides, you’re acting like thirty is ancient! Lots of women have kids aged thirty.”

“Okay, sorry, I didn’t know! My Mom was only young.”

“I can’t believe you just asked me to have kids with you when we’re thirty…”

“Might as well make our marriage interesting,” Jeongguk shrugs.

You quite literally have nothing to say to that.

(11) making someone laugh so hard that their whole body shakes

“Ow- stop! I’m going to pee!”

You don’t think you’ve seen Seokjin laugh at a joke that’s not his own in quite some time. Tonight, across the table in the retro diner that’s been converted and opened in town, he has surprised you. The entire booth shakes with laughter, from all sides and directions. Seokjin leans up against the window, clutching his side with Jimin, Mina and Yoongi all stuffed next to him on the skinny one seater. Next to you, on either side, is Hoseok and Taehyung, with Jeongguk and Namjoon at the counter ordering more drinks.

“What?” you ask, laughing. You’re not laughing because it’s funny, but more so because you have no idea what it is you did to make him laugh so hard. “What did I say?”

Seokjin can hardly get his words out, choking halfway on air and having to reach for his drink which shakes in his hand. He sips and gasps for air: “Just-your...face!” Then he cracks up again, like it’s the literal joke of the century. You just don’t get it.

“What did I do?” you ask. “What’s so funny?”

Seokjin can’t breathe.

“Oh my God,” Yoongi comments, smiling with disbelief and covering his mouth as he laughs. Mina’s french fries are stone cold as she laughs and leans into Yoongi’s side for support.

“Fuck. Y/N, you’re so funny, I love you so much,” Seokjin cries. Cries, literally; there are tears pooling out of his eyes, and he wipes them, sighing loudly as he laughs a few more times.

You’re going to take the compliment happily, and move on. To this day, you never found out what was so funny…

(12) hanging out in furniture stores and testing every couch there is

“Take a picture of me so we can pretend this is our house for Instagram.”

You sigh, taking out your phone and snapping a photo of Taehyung, lounging his legs apart across a lime green sofa that looks like it’s been hauled out of a 70’s magazine. One of the best things about Taehyung is that he’s easy to please, eccentric and adventurous just like you. Taehyung could be taken to a junkyard for a first date and somehow he’d still find it fun. He didn’t watch Bottletop Bill and his best friend Corky and leave not taking some inspiration on what to do with scrap junk.

It slowly became a tradition to go to the weirdest places with Taehyung as your date. On weekends or free weekdays you shared, you’d text Taehyung and get him to come with you to somewhere new. On today’s list, IKEA. It’s not totally crazy, or weird or wacky, just something you don’t think you’d do with Yoongi for fun. Taehyung loved the idea.

Taehyung’s making it a mission to sit on every bit of furniture he can find. As he takes a ride up the elevator to the first and main starting point of IKEA, he immediately notices the display couches and stares at you excitedly: “Let’s pretend we’re about to buy our dream house and test all the couches.”

Your eyes light up. “Yes! We can pretend we’re on a TV show reviewing them.”

You don’t think you’ve ever seen Taehyung more excited. “Oh my God, yes!” Then he grabs your hand, tugging you towards a cream themed living display. “Let’s go, wifey! Time to review.”

(You very nearly leave IKEA with a bright red sofa that looks like it’s been handmade and the bottom pillows are patterned with tiny cherries. Sadly, you’re both broke and you don’t have a car to take it home.)

((Taehyung’s devastated.))

(13) deep conversations when it's deep in the night

Sometimes, Yoongi stays awake until the early hours in the living room and kitchen. On days where you can’t sleep, you can hear him pacing around, softly grunting as he walks, something he does without really realising and something you love about him. On occasion, you join him. Like tonight, for example.

Yoongi’s curled up on the kitchen counter when you wake up and leave your room to find him. He sits with his back up against the cupboards, the kitchen window open with a cigarette out the window. Catching your gaze wide-eyed, he moves as if he’s going to put the cigarette out but you stop him.

“I told Jeongguk I’d stop,” Yoongi explains. Inside, he’s just grateful you’re not Jeongguk tonight. The cigarette lets off steam. He doesn’t smoke as often as he used to, just when he needs to. Yoongi looks away from the window as you pick yourself up to sit on the cupboards parallel to him. A bottle of wine is out, and you quietly take off the top and take a large swig.

“You don’t have to explain anything to me,” you tell him honestly. “It’s okay. I won’t tell Jeongguk, too. There’s a new air freshener in the cupboard under the sink. Use that when you’re done.”

Yoongi nods. “Yeah. Thanks, Y/N.”

“Why’d you go back to smoking anyway? Didn’t you tell Jeongguk that you were stopping because you didn’t want to die, or something?” It’s a joke, Yoongi snorts in reply.

“You know how he feels about it. I do too, and I guess I just felt bad about it. It was bad enough for him growing up and at home, and he told me about his brothers asthma attacks because of it and how he almost died, and how his parents smoked religiously and it made them act a certain way.” Yoongi sucks in his breath, like he’s realising what lighting the cigarette means. “It’s not weed. Not what his parents did, but. Still, fuck.” He decides to put it out.

For a while, you don’t say anything to Yoongi. Staring at him is telling enough, and you watch as Yoongi regrets what he’s done so much that he pales, his eyes watering.

“I don’t want to let him down,” Yoongi admits truthfully. “He’s like my little brother. I don’t wanna hurt him, fuck.”

He rocks his head back, sighing into the night. Down below the window, over the small little cliffside that he can see from his window that looks down onto the freeway behind the flat, he watches the lines of traffic whiz by, like long white lights, the honks like ASMR in his ears.

“If you’re going back to bed, can you go in my room and take the rest of my cigs out? Don’t wanna feel tempted by them. Toss them out or something, will you?”

You nod immediately, taking another drink of wine. This gulp stings. “Course. Yeah, I’m gonna go now actually.” You hop down off the counter, handing the bottle and placing it next to Yoongi. “Don’t stay up too late, mkay?”

“Yeah. Thanks.”

You shrug in reply, Yoongi frowns. As you walk towards the doorway that separates the kitchen and the hall, you turn around and look back at Yoongi, calling his name. Yoongi looks over and raises his eyebrows expectantly.

“Love you,” you tell him. A smile follows, and Yoongi blinks tiredly.

“I love you too. Goodnight, Y/N.”

He watches as you disappear into the darkness of the hallway and then faces the nighttime again. The smell of cigarettes lingers, and his stomach churns. Yoongi reaches for the air freshener you mentioned and sprays it generously, sniffing and then turning off the lights to the kitchen. Jeongguk will wake up and complain about the window being open, and might even notice the ash on the windowsill, but, like you, he still loves his big brother regardless.

(14) holding hands while jaywalking so that u Both get hit by a car

“Now!”

A squeal leaves your mouth as Jeongguk grabs a hold of your hand and literally pulls you across the road. A car that speeds down the road presses the horn loud enough to turn a few heads and Jeongguk grins boyishly, raising his hand as if to say sorry even though you’re far enough away to not get hit. Jeongguk’s motto for jaywalking is We Hold Hands, Because We Go Together Or We Don’t Go Down At All, or something. You know he stole half of it from an All Time Low song, but it works, and the song slaps.

From across the road, on the side you and Jeongguk are running towards, Hoseok gapes at the both of you and his eyes bulge out of his head.

“You two have a death wish!” he yells.

“But we lived, bitch!” Jeongguk replies, raising a gang sign to which Hoseok pulls a face at.

“I literally cannot stand you,” Hoseok seethes, walking away even though he’s supposed to be going out for dinner with the both of you. You and Jeongguk share a look that ends in a burst of giggles and run after Hoseok, capturing each of his arms with your own. He complains all the way to the restaurant, even though he loves it.

(15) randomly buying a flower for someone

“Delivery.”

Namjoon’s voice lifts your head. He stands behind the reception desk of your flat complex with a small bunch of flowers in his left hand. If he didn’t already know that you were working your two hour shift today, then he’s lucky he caught you. The sight of a bouquet of wildflowers makes your heart soar curiously.

“For someone special?” you wonder. Maybe he’s delivering to someone in the complex. Namjoon’s a sweetie like that.

Namjoon blinks. “Yeah. You.” He holds the bouquet outwards, with a bright smile. “They were for sale outside as I got off my subway. Thought of you, again. Happy early birthday.”

“My birthday’s in, like, seven months,” you say.

“That’s why it’s for your early birthday,” Namjoon replies.

You don’t know what to say. “They’re so pretty, thank you. Hey - can you go up to my flat and put them in a vase? I’ve still got an hour here, they might dry out if they’re kept down here.”

Namjoon nods instantly. “Sure. Gimme your key?” You slide the key across the desk towards Namjoon and he takes it swiftly. “Cool. Glad you like them. Enjoy your shift, Y/N.”

“Unlikely,” you groan. “Thanks, Joonie!”

He smiles as he reaches the door, sticking his tongue out to you as he prepares to climb the stairs. That elevator needs fixing urgently, and all you can think about is how much you love your friends.

(16) letting ur friends taste ur food and also tasting theirs to the point where u basically ate a fair amount off of each plate on the table

“What do you mean you’ve never tried a steak before?” Yoongi sighs so loudly that it turns a few heads. “Okay. Take a bite, it’s called charity and I’m generous. Come on.”

Yoongi even cuts you a slice and leans over the table to let you taste it. Beside you, Namjoon cringes when you close your teeth around the fork and pull the steak off, taking several bites and widening your eyes with wonder a Yoongi. You have just unlocked a taste sensation!

“Like it?” Yoongi asks.

“Mhm! It’s so easy to eat,” you observe. You look at Namjoon, “try his.”

Yoongi sighs. He willingly shares his food out. You glance down at your own meal, a pretty pasta dish that Jeongguk looks at from next to Yoongi.

“What is that? It looks good,” Jeongguk asks.

“Spaghetti Al Pomodoro,” you quote from the menu. Jeongguk laughs, because who goes to a restaurant and orders spaghetti? “Stop, I don’t know the menu, I played it safe!”

“Lemme try,” Jeongguk invites himself to try the taste, twirling his fork around the pasta and sucking it up like a scene in Lady and the Tramp. This sets off a sequence around the table, something you can’t help but snigger at. Namjoon lets you try some of his curry and Yoongi tries Jeongguk’s burger. By the time everybody on the table has tried everybody elses meals, you finally look back at your plate and notice that literally half of the meal’s now gone. Yoongi has about one bite of steak left, and Jeongguk could easily finish his burger in one bite.

“I hope everyone enjoyed my meal,” Yoongi says sarcastically, and he angrily chews his last piece of steak.

Namjoon looks up with a bright smile. “Yeah I did. Thanks!”

(17) "give me that I'll carry it for u"

Sometimes, Hoseok stops by at the reception to help out, especially during finals or midterms when you could really use those two years of monitoring an empty email inbox to study. Today, one of the newer residents, Somi, is on the desk and is playing Club Penguin on the computer, and you’re shoved into the back storage room with Hoseok, filing everybody’s mail and parcels.

It’s so messy in here, and looks like it hasn’t had a good clean out since it was first built, which might sound ridiculous, but have you seen all of this dust?

“Can you guys take out the trash?” One of the other workers, Siwon, pokes his head into the back room.

“You only just asked us to do this, though,” Hoseok points out with his hands on his hips.

Siwon shrugs, “Okay. And? Get to work.”

He turns and leaves as Hoseok gives him the middle finger, groaning as he arches his back to relieve pain that’s developed from being hunched over for too long. The trash bags are enormous and bulky with weight, shoved into a single room that absolutely honks. Hoseok grimaces as he opens the door and drags some bags out, deliberately ignoring a suspicious juice leaving a trail behind one of the ones he’s just brought into the back room.

“That literally stinks,” you complain.

“Yep.”

While Hoseok continues to haul bags out of the trash room, you take it upon yourself to drag the bags out to the back, towards the giant tip that’s collected by the bin-men the following day. After two or three trips, Hoseok steps out of the room and notices you struggling to pick a big bag up off the floor over your shoulder, like Santa’s sack.

“Give me that, I’ll carry it for you,” Hoseok offers, already stepping forward.

“No!” you protest stubbornly. “I’ve got this.”

“You’re so full of bullshit,” Hoseok howls. He ignores you and snatches the bag out of your hands. You’ll never admit it, but it feels good to not have the twisty material burning your fingers. “Sit down. You’ve worked hard.”

“Don’t patronise me,” you scold.

He giggles, “sorry. You’re too cute. Keep filling in those forms, kill two birds with one stone?”

You wait until Hoseok’s out of the room to cradle your fingers. Fucking hell, that hurts.

(18) helping ur friend decide what to wear while also reminding them that they look amazing no matter what

“You’re not going to the Met Gala, Jimin. Just wear jeans, my dude.”

“No. No, no, ignore him.” You throw a glare in Jeongguk’s direction and shift on your stomach, watching Jimin frantically search through his wardrobe. “This is important. This is serious. He’s going to see a potential employer, Jeongguk.”

“Yeah,” Jimin taunts, “so go be jobless and broke somewhere else.”

Jeongguk snorts, “I have a job, though…”

“Okay, get out of my room. Y/N, help me.”

“You looked good in the last four outfits,” you say to him honestly. “What’s wrong with this one, hm?”

You stand up, moving to one of the outfits laid out on the floor. It’s a pretty combination of clothes; a patterned white shirt that’s both formal and casual, with black trousers and brown shoes.

“I don’t like the shoes,” Jimin mumbles, continuing to search.

“Okay...Why don’t we just…” You crouch, moving a pair of black shoes from outfit number three to outfit number two. Now the shoes are black, and the outfit looks great. “Do that? What do you think?”

Jimin looks down at it, biting his bottom lip. “Is it good?”

“Yeah, totally,” you nod with enthusiasm. “It shows your personality whilst also remaining professional. And you looked super handsome in it.” Jimin faces you with a shy smile, “Trust me. It’s the one.”

It takes some reluctance and convincing, but Jimin eventually settles on outfit number two. All it took was some convincing and abuse of his praise kink.

(And he got the job.)

(19) being involved in every bad hair decision (dyeing ur friend's hair grey in between playing with their switch)

Three games into Mario Kart, you realise that you urgently need to email Nintendo and play I’m-Karen-Let-Me-See-The-Manager. Nintendo Switches are so dangerously addictive that Seokjin has you watching him play as grey hair dye bleaches his scalp. You can’t help but watch as he wins race after race, a streak of ten to beat tonight with King Boo as his racer every damn time.

“Fuck, your hair!” You must have said that so many times that Seokjin’s bound to get sick of it. He glances up at his reflection and eyes the sight on his head.

“Looks fine,” he shrugs.

“Let me remind you that it looks fine because the colour’s okay at the front. It looks kinda...patchy at the back.” You reach for the dye, “We’re low. Seokjin, we’re in trouble.”

He shrugs again. “Whatever. We can make a new trend.”

“Hell no. If it looks shit, I’m paying for you to get it done professionally ...which, you should have just done in the first place. I'm not a hairdresser!”

“And thank fuck for that!” Jimin steps into the living room and laughs nervously. “That looks hideous!”

This time, Seokjin’s eyes raise icily.

“It’s not that bad…” you mutter. “It’s okay. I’ll fix it.”

“The only way to save your hair is to just sacrifice it all,” Jimin sighs. “You know what, I’ve got a razor in my cupboard, let’s bring forward bald Seokjin.”

“I’ll take the patchy scalp,” Seokjin threatens.

“It’s really not that bad,” you pout quietly, attempting to fix the mess at the back of his head.

Okay - you’re lying. It’s awful. It’s a total disaster. But when Seokjin gets a good look at it, and he does take a good long look, he just shrugs and puts down the mirror.

“It’s a trend,” he decides. Mario Kart resumes and you’re rendered absolutely speechless.

(20) paying attention

When forced into a group of friends outside of your own, you always had a tendency to stand out in the worst ways possible. It’s not as if you stood out for being different, or funny or pretty. No; outside of your close circle of friends, you were the obvious outsider. You stuck out like an imposter, like a red flower amongst white ones.

This get together hosted by one of Jeongguk’s other friends, Joshua, takes place in his crazy expensive lake house in the countryside, owned by his parents and left to him when he turned eighteen. It’s remarkable that you got invited, to be honest. But, when Jeongguk’s your best friend, you get vouched for, granted permission to stay for the weekend in the one of many rooms, with the exception of sharing a room with two other guys. Jeongguk doesn’t mind sharing a bed for the weekend with Jimin, as long as you’re comfortable in your own.

And you’re not blind - it’s not hard to figure out why a big group of girls who had managed invitations were clinging to your circle of friends. You had lucked out in a way that ensured your entire group were visuals, everybody stunning in their own unique way. Joshua and his friends are here too, obviously, but their eyes are only on a certain segment of the group. From this angle, one of the girls who made her way over to the sofas sits with her back in your general direction, and it sort of feels like primary school all over again where you were the odd one out.

You try not to let it bother you, though. As the guys play polite and laugh when needed and talk casually, something slips up in conversation: “Well, actually-” One of the girls is talking, blinking repetitively in Namjoon’s direction with a sweet smile, “I think I have more guy friends than girls. Girls are so hard to talk to sometimes.”

“Right?” one of the others says with a sigh. “I wish I had more male friends. I want to move in with some in the future.”

You inhale. This is a good conversation to jump into. “Same,” you say. The girl in front of you turns around slightly, perhaps only just remembering that you were there in the first place. “I’ve been friends with these guys forever now, and living with them is so…” You notice after a short ramble that the girls turned back around, and she’s not even listening. You trail off, looking bored, “who am I even talking to?”

But from across the coffee table on the other couch, Yoongi furrows his brows and sets his glass down. “Y/N’s right,” he announces, and you look up at the same time as the other girls. Like they’re confused, they look at the group and then back at you, as if wondering the connection. “You know, guys are always told being friends with girls is impossible, but Y/N’s the glue that keeps us together.”

Jeongguk nods, “Mhm, exactly! You know, they said that it would be hard being friends with girls because you’d catch feelings, but Y/N’s so repulsive that it’s not even that hard...”

You glare at him, “Ha-ha. Very funny.”

“Trust me,” Chaeyoung pops up, having been sat silently in between Taehyung and Mark for the past twenty six minutes, “it’s not all that.” The girls look at her, “Men are disgusting. I don’t know how Y/N does it. These guys are the repulsive ones...I was in their flat for five minutes and I think I caught three diseases.”

“Hey, don’t drag my apartment into this,” you pout. Yoongi shakes his head with a smile and watches you, happy that the frown that was once on your features had disappeared into a smile. Hey, in a weird way, this was a good conversation to jump into! 

The girls around you share glances, as though they’ve just clocked on to how important you are to these guys and how ignoring you won’t make them like them more, and eventually, you’re included in the conversation. You make a mental reminder to thank the fuck out of Yoongi for paying attention to you, even when you’re silently in the background.

(21) being aware and understanding of someone's financial situation ("dw I'll pay for u")

“We all need matching ones. Look, one each!”

Jeongguk excitedly crouches in front of one of the display cases, marvelling at the sight of tiny little charms on foam boxes, smiling up at you all. It makes you weak seeing how childlike Jeongguk actually is, how he gets excited over shiny things like a little magpie. Today is one of those rare afternoons where you’re all miraculously free, and it had been Namjoon’s idea to go out somewhere and hang out. Seoul is filled with beautiful and secret places to explore like a tourist and he takes up the opportunity.

This shop is dinky and in a weird place between an ice-cream shop and a fish market, probably scammy and has definitely seen better days. But Namjoon likes it, and Yoongi vouches for it because he’s been here before with Namjoon when they brought a watch for Jimin. Okay, yes, it was a designer watch, but it was way cheaper from this shop and, wait, who cares if it’s fake? Nobody noticed until now.

You stand behind Jeongguk, peering down at the charms. They’re all so cute and cartoon-like, each charm you view immediately reminding you of another friend. For Jeongguk, the rabbit. Taehyung could have the paintbrush or camera, Jimin definitely could have the apple because of the fact that his new favourite thing to say is An Apple A Day Keeps The Demons Away. It makes no sense, but he learns to roll with it.

“They’re cute,” Hoseok comments, smiling widely.

“They should be cute, for thirty dollars a charm!” you gape, pointing out the price. “I thought this was a shop that sold things cheaper?!”

“They’re usually around sixty,” Namjoon shrugs.

“For why?” you exclaim.

Nobody hears that, or if they do, they ignore it. With a sigh, you turn away from the case and start looking at something else. Thirty dollars for a small charm is insane, and you don’t have that kind of money. As Taehyung and Jeongguk start picking charms for everybody, your heart rate quickens. 

How can you tell them that you don’t want a charm because you can’t afford a charm without disappointing them and sounding like you’re asking one of them to buy you one? In your panic, Seokjin worms his way up behind you and rests his arm up on your head like an arm-rest.

“Have you picked a charm?” he asks, and you look away instantly. “Hey,” he says, noticing that, “what’s up, buttercup?”

You sigh reluctantly. “I can’t afford to get one of those…”

Seokjin blinks and frowns slightly. “Oh. Well, that’s okay. I’ll pay for you.”

“No way!” you hiss at him, poking a finger into his chest. “Kim Seokjin, don’t you dare-!”

“Hey, I owe you, it’s cool,” Seokjin assures you.

“Owing me because I paid for your McDonalds is not the same as spending thirty dollars on a tiny charm.”

“They’re friendship charms,” he explains. “It’s symbolic for our friendship. Look, stay silent and pretty and let me get you something nice. Please?”

In this one instance, Seokjin doesn’t take no for an answer and invites himself into the small huddle of guys around the charms and picks one out for you. Seokjin picks you a love heart, because he knows that no matter what, there’s a love between the guys and you that nothing can pull apart.

(22) looking stupid in public together (dancing in stores to overplayed pop songs)

You hear it at the same time as Jeongguk.

One thing you don’t mind that much about Korea is that the sound of random K-POP groups follows you around everywhere you go. You actually kind of like it, because the songs are catchy enough and Jimin and Hoseok like it for the dances. But, my God, if you have to hear Momoland’s Bboom Bboom one more time, you might explode.

Over the hum of the refrigerators in the small GS25, where you and Jeongguk are examining the surprisingly large collection of flavoured milks, you hear those guitar strums and just as the horns roll in, you and Jeongguk share a glance and immediately do The Thing.

The Thing is recreating the entire dance routine to the song, which you had both decided to learn when you were bored and procrastinating during midterms. Everybody else in your friendship group deems it the single most embarrassing thing that you and Jeongguk do in public next to jaywalking, and maybe you can see why. The chorus rolls by and you’re both shimmying, pointing finger hearts to each other, and it’s rolling to an end when one of the cashiers turns the corner with a big tray of iced coffee in her arms.

She pauses and so do the both of you, in an intense stare off until she cowers and scurries to put down the tray and carefully shelf the drinks. Jeongguk looks at you with the urge to laugh and picks a random milk off the shelf, urging you out of the aisle to pay. When you’re outside and free from the judgement of the cashier, Jeongguk laughs on the floor for about five straight minutes.

(23) looking stupid in public together (singing loudly in ur car)

“JUST GO AHEAD AND HATE ON ME AND RUN YOUR MOUTH!”

“So everyone can hear!”

“HIT ME WITH THE WORST YOU GOT AND KNOCK ME DOWN!”

“Oh, baby, I don’t care.”

“KEEP IT UP AND SOON ENOUGH, YOU’LL FIGURE OUT!”

Both of your voices: “You wanna be, you wanna be, A LOSER LIKE ME!”

In the backseat, Yoongi shrinks further down until his bum is hanging off the chair, in the footwell where his knees are. “Please kill me.”

(24) hugging people when u say hi and goodbye to them

Hoseok is one of the best friends you could ever ask for. One, he’s friendly. Two, he’s funny. Three, he’s cute. Four, he hugs you when you arrive somewhere and again when you leave, and you absolutely love it.

“Y/N, hi!” His voice is the first to call out to you when you walk into the Open Day fair at your Uni. You look awful, overslept and still half asleep, but he comes towards you with a smile and engulfs you in a hug. “You look cute. Sleep well?”

That’s not to say the other guys don’t hug you, because they definitely do. But, Hoseok’s always the first.

(25) being there for someone even if u can't help them

“Go ahead. Laugh at me like everybody else.”

Jimin and Jeongguk are the ones who are unfortunately tasked with dealing with a tragically grieving Y/N. It’s unfortunate to you, but they don’t mind one bit. The last thing they expected to see when they came back to Jeongguk’s apartment to watch more episodes of Mindhunter on Jeongguk’s TV, was you curled up on the window seat with red eyes and a runny nose.

“Why would we laugh at you, baby?” Jeongguk asks, rubbing your back. He’s sat next to you and Jimin is by your feet, rubbing them and your legs with his soft hands.

You sniff uglily, but none of them say anything. “Cause. Cause it’s just a fish, I guess.”

“It was still your pet,” Jimin points out sadly. “Susan was a great fish.”

You sniff again, crying some more. “I just feel like a bad owner. Maybe the bowl wasn’t big enough, and maybe I didn’t feed her enough...I don’t want her to have died because of me.”

“Hey, now,” Jeongguk assures softly, “I’m sure she died peacefully. You were the best fish Mom ever. Susan’s in a better place now.” He glances over at Jimin nervously, “Like, fish heaven?”

For a moment you don’t say anything, and Jeongguk thinks maybe that was too much. But then you turn to him with a hopeful expression. “You really think so?”

“Yeah, of course,” Jeongguk replies.

“Susan’s still with you in your heart,” Jimin adds. He’s not too great at the comforting thing. “You were so good to her. If I was a fish, I’d want you to be my Mom.”

Jeongguk looks at Jimin with a deadpan face. Maybe that was too much, but you smiled, and that’s something to Jimin. Even if he doesn’t know what to do to help, the least he can do is be there for you.

(26) "this reminded me of u"

[03:15AM] namjoon: hehe [03:15AM] namjoon: this reminded me of u ^__^ [03:16AM] namjoon: [1 Image Attached]

[03:20AM] y/n: there r no words….

(27) allowing people to be human, with everything that this entails

University truly has been the best years of your life. There’ve been rough spots financially and mentally, but your key support system has been the circle of friends you’re proud to love and live with. Even when they’re a little bit chaotic, sometimes really annoying and loud and tiring, you still love them, and every quality that comes along with loving them.

[jaspers-levis]

Episode 3:Walk to Emily’s

TW: fluff, allusions to abuse

Episode Three: Walk to Emily’s

“I said I was sorry!! Please Please Please Ple--” you sat up thrashing the covers off yourself, heart thudding and sweat pouring down your back uncomfortably. Your throat was sore with choked screams, muscles aching from an unrun marathon, your instincts screaming at you to flee. Panting, you snapped your bedside light on and saw that the room was empty, save yourself. It took a few more ragged breaths before you collapsed back onto your pillows weakly. Just another nightmare.

Your phone buzzed again; that must have been what woke you. You’d only had this phone number for the few months you’d been here, so it was rare that anyone ever texted or called you. Very few people from your life before had this number, and even fewer actually messaged you on a regular basis. 

It was Paul: u up? Sry to wake u

It was just after 6am, and while normally you’d love to sleep for another couple hours, there was no chance you were going to willingly venture back into your nightmares.

Yeah, I am now

Great! U want coffee?

Is that even a question?

Lol. meet u at ur mailbox and walk 2 Emily’s?

Sure, see you in 15

Groaning, you rubbed your hands over your face and rolled out of bed. You couldn’t believe that you’d agree to meet a stranger again for coffee so early in the morning, but the idea of being alone with your own thoughts had you throwing on leggings and an old sweatshirt and darting out the door in record time. It was shocking really; you’d never been one to seek comfort in another’s company due to your history but something about Paul calmed your racing thoughts. You were just yourself again with him and your soul craved the comfort of talking to someone who didn’t know your past. Someone who would just let you be you. Someone who wouldn’t hurt you.

You were halfway down your driveway before you could even think about how you’d barely run a brush through your hair and scrubbed your face before running out here and by then it was too late to turn back and put on a touch of makeup to tame your hair into some semblance of order. Paul was just gonna have to get over it, and if he complained then you’d make him pay for coffee.

“Good morning sunshine,” Paul greeted you, leaning on your mailbox and looking like he’d slept for a solid 8 hours, unlike yourself. “Ready for some coffee?”

“Hell yes,” you tried to hide your yawn as you fell into step beside him in the misty morning air. Tendrils of fog curled around the mossy trees, teasing at the shapes in the undergrowth and playing tricks on your eyes. Was that a wolf’s tail disappearing around a trunk there?

“Long night?” he asked, shoving his hands in the pocket of his hoodie. His dark eyes noted the circles beneath yours with mild concern and you ducked your head to hide from his scrutiny.

“You could say that,” you yawned again, jaw cracking this time.

“What, your pack of male admirers flood your inbox with messages all night?” He teased, elbowing you. He didn’t think you’d notice this attempt at subtlety asking if you had a boyfriend and you grinned wryly.

“Haha, funny story,” you said drolly, rolling your eyes. “No male admirers at present, just bad dreams.”

“Ah, well,” Paul shrugged, and you averted your eyes from his not-so-subtle triumphant grin, the butterflies making a comeback. It was stupid of you, so stupid of you to fall for him. You were just barely getting your feet under you as it was. You still flinched when you slammed a cupboard too loud, or passed the one bar in town where music and loud voices spilled out, soaked in alcohol. You were still hiding from the ghosts of your past lurking around every ringtone that sounded like his, every car that looked remotely like his, every man who looked like him. 

It was so stupid to fall for Paul. So stupid and so easy.

[prvntcessa]

listen up 10s a 4 is speaking! shdlaskhd what’s up sluts i’m cherry, i’m 21, use she/her pronouns and live in PST! this is mischa, princess of the russian mafia. she wears black lipstick, is massive scammer, laughs at videos of people falling down the stairs. here is a shorter sparknotes version of her bio and some fun and fresh headcannons

please enjoy this gif of mischa cosplaying indie xoxo

SPARKNOTES BIO! 

skeleton: the career criminal

name: mischa dostoyevsky ( formally xia han)

age: 25

gender: female

pronouns: she/her

fc: natasha liu bordizzo

born as xia to a dirt poor family of literal SCAM artists. we luv a scamily babey! her parents basically sold fraudulent anti-aging serum to dumb, white new york tourists everyday ( with the added bonus of her older brother dressed up like an OLD ASS MAN doing cartwheels n backflips like woooow this stuff really works! ) her job was basically sneaking through the crowd of people while they were distracted and pick-pocketing their money, valuables, shiny shit etc.  

that white savior guilt money was paying the bills until one of the karens they conned got hives from the allergic reaction to the red food dye they used in the fake serum and her brothers literal Old Man disguise flew off like 90s rapper fly away pants when it was windy as fuck one day so basically The Authorities Have Been Called Luv, the police showed up and xia didn’t know what to do bc she was a kid so she just BOLTED AND RAN ... does not know what happened to her family to this day

grew up on the street, continued the family business of being a fcking scammer and basically bought tampons by telling power walking, baby backpacking ladies that she was gonna have to feed little timmy cockroaches if they didn’t pay off, slept with crooked stock brokers, seduced old guys, cleaned out their apartments, stole all their money, jewels, watches, credit cards, priceless antiques -- THE WORLD WAS HER SUGAR DADDI BB

all of this changed on day when she making her nightly run by the alibi, a bar she called Dumb Rich Guy Bar and saw a weird old guy come out looooaded with what looked expensive shit,  but she really wanted his pocketwatch which from her experience was mad expensive. so she did her lil routine and THOUGHT she stole the watch but LOL SPIDERMAN MEME, he stole the watch back and the ring she was wearing AND HIS BODY GUARD HAD A GUN PLACED ON HER. MMM WHATCHA SAY

so turns out the weird old guy she tried to steal from was VLADIMIR DOSTOYEVSKY!!!! THE HEAD OF THE RUSSIAN FUCKING MAFIA. yiiiiikes! lmao she was like cool im gonna die but he was like hold up, u chose the pocket watch, the only real and valuable thing i was wearing ... i like u ur smart u have fire, u remind me of my dead wife  YOU WILL BE MY SUCCESSOR ur name is now mischa for my unborn son and i will teach u the ropes

so there is no more xia, only mischa, basically adopted by vladimir who she calls dad/nana and who calls her rabbit as a nickname (they play monopoly every night and VLAD CHEATS EVERY TIME BRO). she is the only girl in the bratva aka The Brotherhood which is what the russian mafia is called. shes kind of their wendy. shes worshipped outwardly but theres probably a lot of people that hate her ... which leads me to ........PAPA DYING! BIG RIP OG PAPA! he was poisoned at dinner and people say it was the italians but mischa is sure it was an inside job

bc of vlad dying *pour one out for vladdy daddy* mischa is head of the bratva aka russian mafia they call her PAPA bc thats how people refer to the mob boss SO SDHLLKDSH

ALSO PLOT TWIST! originally the plate that killed her dad was the plate she was given but he switched with her bc his piece of chicken was bigger and he wanted her to have it :((((( SO THE POISON PLATE WAS HER PLATE SO SOMEONE WAS TRYNA KILL HER DUN DUN DUNNNNNNN

ok here are HCS they are from the bottom of my app xx

nicknames include who’s your papa, big papa and daddy purely because it’s iconic. but also she is probably that gifset where rihanna is talking abt how shes a bad bitch w top energy but is a massive bottom ahdlaks

mischa i think has to look a certain way of looking when dealing w the mob ( sort of girl boss, designer clothes, femme fatale ) but i think she is relatively unlady-like and prefers ratty jeans, plaid skirts, flannels, black combat boots, messy ponytails and the like when she’s relaxing. reminds her of life before.

practices makeup on dmitri and boris (her body guards) who complain a lot but also love her xoxo 

owns a very big fluffy, luxurious cat named perogi, he’s her son, a gift from dear old dad. 

has a pretty severe drinking problem ( vodka on the rocks is the poison ) after her father died and sleeps with a gun ( although i think she's better with a knife )

thus can drink you under the table also swears like an old sailor man ( is working on it, the whole mob sighs when she calls japanese businessmen idiot douche canoe fuckbags to their faces during monthly debt collections )

mischa can speak 5 languages in order to speak to people all over the world: madarin ( from her childhood ), english, russian ( mob ), spanish and french. 

pansexual queen and i want to say scorpio 

she’s grateful obviously to папа doing more off the grid, low quality criminal stuff without supervision because she is a truant, tramp, scam artist cat burglar klepto at heart <3

cinnamon roll meme: looks like she could kill you and would probably kill you

so i want to say she probably met the star of the show doing something where she snuck out at night with her bodyguards not knowing, wore her civilian clothes, blended in kept her head down because she missed freedom and accidentally met them out there like that under a pseudonym to hide her mafia life/continued to sneak out to see them like that before being exposed. very double life stuff angsty secret mafia princess stuff. we love hannah mon-mafia.

scared her parents will resurface/past will resurface ( supposedly папа bribed the police but . . . karma is a bitch )

has A LOT of suitors meant to strengthen The Empire and bridge conflicts between mobs but cares little, them: 💕, her: hocks a loogie and wipes on pants … she SUCSKSSKSS

has burped at important business dinners before and simultaneously has brought massive mafiosos to their knees. literally will have your dick cut off if you say something misogynistic, racist or something about her father :) she has a collection. ( its a big collection, but still quite little if you know what i mean )

rumored to have killed a man with the sharp end of her louboutin.

has a slight accent just from being surrounded by it constantly and word switches

smells like cinnamon and scraped knees

[memosmilkers]

Unspoken words of lost hope

[Stuff I wanted to tell my ex in our future but ultimately didn’t happen. And maybe getting it out will help me heal.]

1. I never told you this, and I was waiting for us to have met in person a couple times to tell you, that I think I fell in love with you at first sight. I remember so clearly the first selfie you sent me. I couldn’t stop looking. I couldn’t stop thinking how cute you were. My heart started beating fast at just the sight of your face. I know at the time our friendship was just blossoming and I was with someone else. I wonder how u felt when you first saw my face..  2. No matter how I much I liked my first ex, the pull towards you was so much greater. I loved talkin with you. There was always a spark when I spoke to you. You filled me with so much joy. I loved how you made me into a better person. You cared for me in a way no one had before. I just don’t know what I did to make that go away. 3. When you had a tumblr, all the stuff you tagged me in, I cherished so much. I would look at it so much, because it would make my heart flutter.  4. Once we started “dating” I saved every single selfie you would send me. I loved telling you how cute you were and beautiful and gorgeous. I just wonder why you never did the same for me. The best I could muster from you was “you’re makeup is so pretty”  5. I loved you to the point of creation. you were my muse. you motivated me to draw and to do so many things. I felt so powerful with you by my side.  6. I really thought you were my soulmate. I longed and yearned for you more than you know. I often cried at the thought of our deaths, because we would be apart. I wanted to be with you forever, even after death. I often longed for our souls to merge and fuse. I longed so much to be with you it was unreal. The way our minds were constantly in sync. 7. I loved how we understood each other so well. How when rping we often would write out “replies” to each other, sending it within seconds of each other, i still dont know how thats possible. we just complimented each other so well. We understood each other w so few words. We would somehow be thinking of the same thing at the same time. It was something that always amazed me each time it happened. 8. There was this line in Parks and Rec theres a scene where Ben tells Leslie something along the lines of “I understand that I went through everything I did for you, to understand you, to find you, and to be with you.” and that’s exactly how I felt about meeting you. I felt like everything I went through finally had a purpose. It was to better understand you, the person whom I thought was my other half. And that thought made me drown further in my love for u.  9. There were dreams that we discussed that almost seemed like we were beginning to get linked in a psychic way. It further confirmed for me that we were soul mates. we would have such similar dreams. or my dreams took on ur type of dreams and ur dreams took on my kind of dreams.  10.  This is moreso after us breaking up. But I really thought i meant more to you. I thought you would chase me the way I had chased you. There were so many nights I dreamt of you showing up at my doorstep.  many times I thought you would have fought for me the way I had fought for you.  11. The fact that you wanted to get matching tattoos was so huge for me. It’s something I was always against for a couple. But you assurance that you loved me enough to get a tattoo with me, and more, one that I created, was beyond words.  After writing this I wonder wat went wrong in something that went so beautifully at the beginning. What did I do wrong to make you lose the care and understanding we once had for each other. I loved you to a fault. I was hurt more by you than any other person. I allowed u to hurt me, bc i thought it would get better. i thought we would make it. I can’t tell you how many nights I went to bed crying. You never expressed yourself too much so I always figured u slept well.  All I want is for you to be truly sorry and understand the hurt that you put me through. 

[okaystraykids-blog]

don’t go; it’s a mighty long fall

2 out of ??

Genre: fluff/angst/school .. 

Seems like it’s going to turn out to be a hyunjin ff but we’ll see

WARNING: some mature themes

| the start of part two |

"Hey Alice, can we sit with you?"

The words echoed in my head and I just stared at Hyunjin as he inquired. The four boys just blinked awkwardly, and I realized they were waiting for an answer. "Sorry, no. I kind of want to stay alone." I kind of glanced away from Hyunjin, and my eyes caught Changbin’s, he was looking at me intently, a wondering expression on his face. The sound of chairs moving disrupted my thoughts, the guys had sat down, Hyunjin on one side of me, Changbin on the other. "I thought I told you no." "You did, but I don't really care." Hyunjin chuckled, pulling out a bento box containing his lunch. I clenched my jaw, my nails digging into the palms of my hands. Please get me through this. I glanced up around the cafeteria and my eyes unwillingly landed on the biggest asshole and reputable fuckboy, in the school, Lio. Lio raised his eyebrows, and winked at me. Turning back to his friends with a sly smile. I could feel my cheeks getting red. This is exactly why I don't hang out with people, I hate attention. Especially from someone like Lio. "Who's he?" Someones voice made me jump. Chan was looking at me questioningly. "Uh, just some fuckboy. He has a big reputation and basically owns the school." "Seems like a fun guy." Jisung scoffed. I couldn't tell if he was being sarcastic or not. I sat with my arms close by my sides, nibbling on my sandwich. I don't like eating with people watching me, it makes my anxiety spike. After a while, I couldn't take it anymore, my skin felt like it was on fire and my hands were trembling. It wasn't like the boys were talking about weird stuff, they were talking about normal boy things, but I just couldn't take being around that many people anymore. I slid my chair back and walked out, not noticing I forgot my book.

By the end of the day I was drained, that lunch took a lot of energy out of me. It was the end of the day, and I was heading to the bus when Chan suddenly called out to me, "Alice! Want a ride?" I shook my head no, and gave a weak smile. I lived alone at the moment, my parents were working out of the city and my siblings were all older and moved out. Chan nodded and turned away. I watched him as he went and eventually I saw him and the 3 others driving away in a large, fancy, SUV. I walked down the steps and saw a familiar group of boys, Lio and his friends. I passed a cloud of vape smoke and shook my head slightly. We get it, you vape. "I'm gonna ask-" "Dude she's boring, she doesn't party-" "I'ma change that." I tried to ignore it but before I could even get down the last step, Lio's caramel raspy voice called out to me. "Hey, it's Alice, right?" I glanced back at him, nodding softly. "There's a party tomorrow after school. You should come." The way he said it made me realize, he wasn't asking, he was telling; if there was one thing I knew not to do, it was not to piss of Lio Drew. I hated that it was a short week and there was no school Wednesday, Thursday or Friday. I've never been to a party, and I knew Lio and his friends were all 18, but I was 17 so I didn't expect to do much. "I guess... yeah sure." I started walking away and overheard again. "Damn you did it bro." "I did, and I'm gonna have a good time tomorrow night." I shook my head, What have I gotten myself into.

MESSAGE RECEIVED 8:45PM

[Changbin] hey a, how was ur day?

[Me] iffy. 

[Changbin] iFFy IFFy yEaH YEaH iFFy IffY YeAh

[Me] I JUSt ChokED On An ICeCuBe LMAO

[Changbin] i gotta go, but have a good night! there's a party on tuesday, u coming?

[Me] ahh, nah probably not. gn though

[Changbin] :(

Even the guys are going? Wow. That's just perfect. 

I was just about to go to sleep when my phone buzzed off, it was an Instagram notification.

LIO_REAL Followed you

LIO_REAL Sent you a Direct Message

OPEN MESSAGE?

YES/NO

(LIO_REAL)

hey there ce, i hope you can make it, the parties at 10, here's the address 

xxx-xx AVE.

I closed my phone, oh god, now I have the biggest fuckboy in the school following me, and he gave me a nickname. This is wonderful. The clock beside my table read 9:24 PM and I finally was able to go to sleep.

The next day I was ready early, just wearing black jeans with slits in the knees, and a tighter than usually fitting maroon tee shirt. Because of this, I was able to catch an early bus. When I arrived, much to my surprise, Changbin and the others were there sitting out front. Changbin looked pretty good I begrudgingly have to admit. Hyunjin too. They looked like they walked right out of a music video. I attempted to sneak by, but Jisungs voice rang out across the quiet morning air. "Alice!" I turned to him and plastered a smile on my face. Damn how I loved his mullet. I walked over to them, sitting on one of the steps. "So," started Chan, "I heard Lio Drew invited you to his party tonight." Both Hyunjin and Changbin looked up at me in shock. I shrugged, looking down. "I guess you could say that... I might not go. I haven't decided yet." Chan raised his eyebrows questioningly, he may have just transferred here but even he knows that when Lio Drew invites you somewhere, you don't say no. I nodded slowly, standing up as it got closer to the bell for first period. "I'm going to go, I have to go to art." Hyunjin jumped up, "we're both going there. I'll come with you." I was about to refuse his company, but something about how genuine his smile was made me grin and nod, "Okay." The whole way to class he was rambling about how his friends and him are making music and how back in Korea his family was moving, and just random things. I was feeling anxious for some reason, and everything he said just went in one ear, out the other. "Alice, can I get your Snapchat and maybe give it to the guys?" I paused for a moment... "Um well I guess so."  After I gave him my Snap we continued walking, and as we turned the corner, Lio and his friends were laughing and walking down the hall towards us. Lio saw me, and stared me down, a smirk on his face. He glanced at Hyunjin on the other side of me, who was adorably oblivious. As he passed, his hand sneakily reached out and grabbed my ass. I gasped, turning to face him but he was already rounding the corner. I could feel my entire body burning and I started to tremble. What the fuck. No one has ever bothered me until I started hanging out with Hyunjin and them. Lio has never even spared me a glance. This is all their fault, It's Changbin's fault.

LIO_REAL Sent you a Direct Message

OPEN MESSAGE?

YES/NO

(LIO_REAL)

sorry bout that ;) my hand slipped. you better still be coming tonight, or i'll bother u more, luv.

I just stared at the message. I should have ignored them better... Hyunjin just looked at me. "Are you alright? Did he say something?" I felt terrible. Sick to my stomach. I just stared Hyunjin dead in the eyes, and walked away. I've never skipped before, but I couldn't handle being around him for two classes. I went to the lunchroom, sitting by the windows rather than my usual spot. My brain not fully comprehending that that was right beside where Lio and his friends usually sit.

[Changbin] im bored :( meet up with mee

[Me] im in class, not today

[Changbin] nO, nOt toDAYyy, nOnO noT toDaY

[Me] lol.

I continued to sit, staring outside, and before I knew it I had fallen asleep. I slept for two class periods, each class 80 minutes long, and I finally woke up right as the lunch bell rang. When people started arriving, I didn't even turn to watch. Until Lio's voice interrupted my train of thought. "Well. Isn't this a surprise!" I spun around and found him sitting at the table behind me, his teeth biting down seductively on his lip. I slipped off the stool in an attempt to leave, but his foot swung out, blocking my way. "Stay." He said simply. Kicking out one of his less important henchmen. "Sit." I could feel eyes on me and I had no choice but to obey. It was obey, or become the victim of abuse from everyone in school. Lio eyed me up and down and waited till I sat down. I glanced to the door and saw Hyunjin walk in, followed by Chan, Jisung and lastly, Changbin. They paused and looked at me sitting with Lio, surprised. Chan was looking at Lio with a frown. Lio noticed that look and proceeded to lean across the table. Before I knew it, his lips were next to my ear and he whispered, "I'm excited for tonight baby-girl." I felt repulsed. I slammed my chair back, grabbed my bag, and walked out. Fuck this school. Fuck Lio.

At 10:00 PM I was laying in my bed watching YouTube, when my phone buzzed. It was a snap from Hyunjin,

I let out an awkward squeak, holy shit he's so pretty. I was about to respond when I suddenly got an Instagram notification...

LIO_REAL Sent you a Direct Message

OPEN MESSAGE?

YES/NO

(LIO_REAL)

where are you. 

(OKAYALICE)

im not coming, lio. 

(LIO_REAL)

if u dont come, im gonna fucking ruin the rest of senior year for you. i swear on it. 

I stared down at my phone, my heart racing. Is this not blackmail? I glanced out the outfit I had previously put on my bed, and I groaned. "Well. Fuck it." I looked at myself in the mirror. I was wearing a decently tight, short, black, skirt and a silver crop top that just covered my belly button. My outfit wasn't complete until I put on my converse. My makeup was different than usual. I was wearing dark red lipstick and I had eyeliner on. I checked the clock. 10:45 PM. Well, fashionably late I guess.

When I arrived outside the house, I could feel the ground booming from the music and I was surprised it hadn't gotten shut down yet. I started walking up the driveway. Already seeing wasted teenagers. It wasn't much better inside. People were everywhere, making out, drinking, smoking, dancing. I thought to myself,

maybe this was a mistake.

[votalia-blog]

((this blog is legit still in preparation but here have some basic info / headcanons on my muses in particular.))

superbia

-if u dont get to see his nice side he is honestly just a big b word -has sharp wits... he’s said so himself and he was able to guess who was smack-talking him in the anime story pretty accurately despite being so far away nfdjkhndfhdf -takes!!! FOREVER!!! to do makeup!!! he was heckin late in the anime bc of this!!! -tbh i dont really remember what happened in his original story except he’s always in charge of everything and he’s super super big on fashion (ran his own runway show thing once, dragged MC to the jewelry store and all too iirc nfjdhnfd) and then he won a game of cliver (note: i have no idea how this is played but it has chess elements) -he’s the leader of the 7 demon losers, and rightfully so bc he’s v smart and analytical, nobody dared to object to anything he said (in the tactics event story everyone just listened to him, even the angels njkdslhdsh) -short-tempered -genderfluid - in his stories he’s always switching from presenting very femininely to presenting masculinely so hopefully i’ll b able to pull it off too, it’s a bit hard w/o his jp speech (watashi+desu wa vs ore) but i’ll find a way to do this i hope -in the anime + records story he’s very motherly!!! v good at taking care of babies/children!!! -he’s too prideful to care what anyone else thinks, obviously... (which is why he didnt care about being late to a lunch party he arranged himself w the rest of votalia) -honestly i’m the least fashionable/aesthetic-appreciating person so i hope i can write superbia and his v keen sense of fashion well (if u want proof i’ll dig up my 3ds and take a pic of my ACNL house) -has so much self-confidence and self-esteem ok SO MUCH it’s overflowing someone stop him -but also if you bring up his past (las and vashti have his childhood photos) he gets embarrassed v easily bc he used to b chubby (and super cute but dont tell him i said that or i die) -probably the one who made everyone in votalia’s clothes -remember he’s a FASHION DESIGNER + MODEL + JAILER + GOVT OFFICIAL he can do everything ok but this also means he’s always very busy -is often feeding grad. -HE IS ON A DIET but he loves smoothies -u better listen to him or else

las

-flirty pervert. he’s exactly what he is on the tin. he’s always asking to bang in-game im not even kidding u, his koisuru literally opened with him asking if MC wanted to screw. -teases a lot, loves teasing ira in particular to get a rise out of him -canonically has told ira he loves ira’s smile and said in a comment about ira that he has “sinful feelings” for him but -with this guy? open for shipping with everyone and anyone that is of age. no minors. let’s be ethical ok. he’s definitely p much canonically pan/bi so let’s be free -i? cannot? write? smut? the mun behind las is 18+ but can’t write smut so i’m not gonna write it!!!! sure he screws MC in canon in his original routes but it faded to black so i’ll fade to black too if we ever get that far and god i hope not im the least passionate romantic -he’s actually v kind and gentle if u get to know him past his pervy exterior -cannot refuse anyone’s advances out of the kindness of his heart -since he’s the 2nd oldest in votalia he has superbia’s childhood photos that he’s used to tease superbia with in the anime -has no idea what love is. his whole original story revolved around him wanting to find love and “have a heart” bc of that -he’s... always stripping for some reason... always dtf i guess and im v sorry for this in advance -i dont trust google translate but if we do trust it then he’s a bastard child and he isn’t really allowed to tell anyone about his past and stuff like that, something about a curse from his lusty mother running in him or something like that, and then his mother left??? or something??? i dont know but he’s p sensitive about his past and he just likes to have fun in the present instead -he’s not mature ok he’ll probably laugh at “lol 69″ he’ll take any opportunity to make a pervy remark anyway -in tactics moon route, he loses the cliver game and confesses he actually has no idea about it njskdhs, but he’s v upset by the loss bc he’s always thinking about others’ happiness rather than himself but he hides his real feelings by smiling all the time -he doesn’t like it if other people have lustful thoughts about the one(s) he loves -mega social and has a lot of friends (his original moon route implied this) -so u can probably find him partying a lot and stuff -............. sleeps around a lot, of course -apparently is close enough to ira that he can just barge into ira’s bedroom all the time -consent is very important to him!!! in his story he was stripping himself and mc was like “WHOA I DONT WANT TO BANG” and he was just v respectfully like “oh ok that’s alright good night” and left and slept in his own room -speaks p casually

ira

-big warning that if ur uncomfy w inhumane tortures??? avoid this guy at all costs, he’s always rambling about what he wants to do to torture others for punishment when he’s angry + actually goes ahead and does it sometimes too -ofc this comes with a bunch of regret immediately after he calms down -this is bc he’s actually trying v hard to be gentle and kind and patient but he’s always overcome by wrath -3 strikes!!! u tick him off 3 times and he’ll go full sadist+torture-loving mode on u. he sounds incredibly polite when irritated so thats when u can tell he’s ticked off (occasionally u can straight up tell when he’s angry though) -not ur typical yandere but an unwilling yandere regardless (cruelly tortured a prisoner for hitting on MC in his original route, regretted it after of course) -likes reading, he’s one of the only introverted ones -is a teacher at his prison bc he always tells them stories?? idk thats what happened in the original route, he was gonna tell the prisoners a story and then they ticked him off -his tortures often involve cutting something off or sewing something up so like i said be wary of that if it makes u iffy -apparently as shown in the anime he’s also relatively good w taking care of children but he doesn’t really like to do it, probably since it’s stressful and a source of anger -HATES!! IT!! when the other votalia princes are shoving responsibilities onto him but he still carries out his duties regardless -very hardworking to the point he is sometimes so focused on work he has no idea what’s going on outside of work (superbia sent him an invitation letter once and he had no idea until las barged into his room and told him so) -always flustered and caught off-guard by las (so much “l-las!!” and stuttering bc of las in the anime story dfnhlsfhs) -trying his best to motivate himself not to be so angry (’for the rest of today i wont get mad anymore!!!’) but ends up losing it all the time anyway -polite and kind if he’s calm -i’m not very dommy so i hope i write this extremely dommy sadist well ;; -blindfolding will calm him down btw -he gets emotional fairly easily, he broke down crying in his original sun route bc he was so upset w himself for doing such inhumane acts when he’s angry and having trouble controlling it, for whatever reason he’s crying in his wedding sun CG too maybe he’s very happy i guess, i didnt read the story bc i dont have that form of him -though i won’t be able to show this, he generally uses “boku” to refer to himself and “watashi” when he’s angry, so that’s normally how you can tell he’s starting to use polite speech, though in general he seems to use polite speech anyway (always ends sentences with “desu”)

vedy

-easily one of, if not THE, nicest of the votalia princes -he always means well!!! -his envy doesnt even show up outside of love actually hsjdlhlsd -he has the typical tsundere traits like denial and “b-baka!” but he’s not very rude at all when he’s not being in denial, in fact he’s extremely outgoing and friendly -SO MUCH ENERGY!!! -loves basketball!!! he has a group of friends he plays bball with!!! he’s even asked that one ugly tangerine to play basketball with him once ok -he can be a bit shy and awkward when he’s flustered (and being tsundere and in denial) -when he’s in love he’s gonna deny it but also at the same time be very very clingy to the person(s) he loves -youngest in votalia at 19... so yeah he’s still an adult but he’s not that mature tbh -his tail wags like a dog when he’s excited and he’ll usually end up rambling on happily!!! -very emotionally expressive -gets bored easily too (was bored of waiting for superbia taking FOREVER to put his makeup on so he went to play bball with vashti instead) -once talked smack about superbia and then felt a chill down his spine despite being super far away from superbia at the time -the mom friend to acedia and grad, to grad especially, scolds grad for eating everything -you can tease him and he’ll get flustered immediately and probably explode on the spot tbh, even acedia teased him once in the splash summer story -can’t take care of babies bc he’s too loud -he has very low self-esteem, has called himself “the worst” before and berates himself especially often when he’s regretting having done something -he’s really regretful when his envy takes over and is really mad at himself and tries to avoid his love interest(s) after he does something out of envy because, you combine a bad action with his low self-esteem, and he’ll want you to stay away from him thinking that it’s for the better for you -he’s almost always yelling or screaming bc he’s so excitable!!! -he speaks in a mega-informal way -if you look at him, he almost always has handcuffs somewhere on himself. actually he’s extremely submissive -he just wants to be your friend -he SOUNDS confident but he’s actually not ok. he’s always yelling and screaming and excited and he tries to be assertive but he’s actually real awkward and shy so feel free to pick on him

[leesungjongg]

BTIMFL Review

This is long and it goes from Negative to Positive, and then to Negative... and then to Positive. I guess you’ll see if you decide to read it. Also it’s very long. warning. Also it’s disorganized and i don’t have time to spam the drama for now but i will later just a warning ok also spoilers and this is just my opinion you don’t have to agree with it. here it is:

warning: rape mention. there was an attempted rape in the drama itself and i talk a little bit about it near the end of the review. just so u know

It was an okay drama. I probably wouldn’t watch it again though, because there were a lot of things that I still had questions about and although the ending was nice, it was not that great, in my opinion. When I was reading the captions/subtitles when Jiho was talking (whether it was the background voice or just her speaking), half the time I ended up not even understanding anything she was saying and I started zoning out .-. Of course, there were cute scenes and scenes that made me smile. There were also scenes where it hurt my heart and I teared up at (like when Sooji’s mom told her that her legs were holding Sooji back from being with her boyfriend LIKE THAT SCENE UGH. MY HEART.) Cute scenes where Jiho was smiling and everything made me really happy :’))))) honestly idek why she decided to terminate the contract bc she twisted and turned with her words so much that i got lost and i was like man, i need a new GPS system. Anyways. The characters were great! The plot? the storyline...???? idk. the scenes also cut off weirdly. everything about this drama is weird. even the whole contract that Sehee and Jiho made to live together/get married and have like nothing else... that was weird. I told my friend and she was like “marriages are more like contracts of loyalty rather than contracts of businesses” and although it wasn’t a business... it wasn’t... i guess it was for loyalty? man idek what im talking about. it was weird that’s all i have to say. what really tugged my heartstrings was when Jiho came back and Sehee was like “no ur just a dream, this is so cruel. but i love this dream, please never leave” aND LIKE JIHO SAW HIM CRY LIKE BRUHHHHHH SAME HERE MAN I WAS LIKE UGHFHFHHHHH JIHO!!!!! my love :( seriously... Jiho... idk who plays Jiho but i remembered her from D Day and in this drama she looks so beautiful. ok here comes the positives im so excited. the lighting... especially the lighting when it came onto Jiho’s eyes (or anyone’s really) WAS SO. PRETTY. WTFFFFFFF honestly she’s so beautiful. I loved her hairstyle, I want to draw her. I suck at drawing but literally @Jiho ur my muse now. i loved the hair and makeup and the lighting so soooo much in the drama. I loved Jiho’s pink coat at the end of the drama, and I surprisingly liked her wedding gown at the beginning of the drama when they first got married. I love Jiho’s shy smiles, she looked like an actually bunny!!! I love everything about her! ok maybe im talking about the actress more than the character BUT STILL. she’s so pretty ;(( Sehee’s pretty cool. Everytime he made a facial expression, I found it hilarious bc he was always keeping the same face in every episode. Idk how he did it. but he’s amazing. i loved when CEO Ma came up behind him and was about to surprise him but then he said Jungmin? AND SEHEE LITERALLY SCREAMED AND ALMOST KILLED CEO MA ok maybe not that far but he almost whacked him in the face lol. the way he got surprised made me laugh. throughout most of the drama though, he had red eyes and from my experience, everytime i’ve had red eyes is when i havent slept enough... i hope the actor who plays him gets a lot more sleep :( CEO Ma. I love him so much. One of my favorite characters. He was so pure honestly and he deserved everything. I’m glad he was there for Sooji, and everything he did for her. It was weird because Sooji didnt want him to intrude on her life but he did it anyway, and in such a romantic way too? I thought he’d be somewhat annoying about it but he was sincere and such a gentleman. Love u CEO Ma. Please continue on your being nice path. Sooji. Very harsh, difficult... she scared me at times. But I loved how badass she was. i would probably be afraid to approach her but i would love to have her as a friend. she’s tough, but sometimes i think she needs a break from life ;( glad she started her own business and quit her job (even though i would’ve loved to see her quit sooner and have a flourishing business) Wonseok.... and Horang :(((((((((((( SERIOUSLY RELATIONSHIP GOALS. Despite the arguing THEY WERE SO CUTE TOGETHER. I loved them so much. It was so weird when they broke up and it felt so wrong, but they got back together in the end... it was weird. like i said, this whole drama is weird. BUT MINSEOK PLAYED IN THIS AHHHH GOOD JOB MINSEOK!!!! Horang is literally gorgeous. so so beautiful, and her smile BLINDS you, god. she’s so pretty. Overall, this drama was okay. ALSO OMG I FORGOT TO MENTION Bok Nam. he’s kinda cute. i wished Lee Hyunwoo played him. he’s adorable in my eyes. Bok Nam was really fishy at the start with him knowing everything SO I WAS SO SURPRISED WHEN HE WASNT THE KIDNAPPER WTF? dude u played that part so well, good JOB. i fell for it. we all fell for it. anyways, at the beginning the drama, Jiho was in a group where she was the assistant writer and honestly i didnt understand anything that she went through with her writing and stuff, all i know is that 1) she wasnt enjoying her position because the other writer kept crossing everything out on her story and making it her own, 2) the guy who had flirted with her for three years and got a FRICKING GIRLFRIEND ended up almost raping her while he was drunk like you deserve to eat dirt. good bye. glad Se hee kicked his ass at the end of the drama (which also made me angry because WOW. it took THIS long for him to come and apologize AND THAT HE SAID HE DIDNT MEAN TO?? WHAT?!!?! son u had every intention of doing that to her that night dont u even dare cover it up with any bs excuse, ur poop now) and to bring back the third point, 3) the writing team tried to get Jiho back WITH HER FRICKING RAPIST AND SHE DECLINED I WAS LIKE YES DONT DO THIS TO YOURSELF YOU DESERVE BETTER IM SO PROUD OF YOU!!!!!! overall. it was an okay drama. didn’t like the almost rape part. didnt like how the scenes were cut weirdly. didnt like how the contract was made and how jiho explained her way of things (even towards the end, her mom was like “i dont understand you” or smth and i was like omfg same thank goodness im not the only one), and didnt like how jiho explained the divorce. but the scenes where you could see sehee and jiho get closer together (the kimchi and the ocean and the looking forward to seeing your husband on the bus, waiting for you, saving a seat for you like son....... that’s so cuTEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!! ALSO WOOSEOK AND HORANGS RELATIONSHIP. minus the bickering and the fact that Horang tried to change Wooseok.. being together 7 years and being happy for that long is amazing. i loved when wooseok called Horang Rang. it was so pretty. i love sooji’s and CEO MA OMG HE’S SO GREAT. I WOULD GIVE HIM EVERYTHING. So glad he was there for sooji. the characters and their relationships together were so great, i really liked it a lot. but the plot was just ahhh.... it could’ve been better. that’s all. i give it a 6.8/10. maybe a 7, but not quite a 7. thank u for reading. hope this mess makes sense :/

[meepface]

i’m kind of having a panic attack about school starting tomorrow so i am just trying to distract myself feel free to ignore me

(1) Do You Sleep With Your Closet Doors Open Or Closed? 

closed 

(2) Do You Have Freckles? 

i used to have a lot as a kid but they kinda went away but you can still sorta see them. when i’m out in the sun a lot though they come out and it makes me so happy i wish they would stay like that

(3) Can You Whistle? 

not very well

(4) Last Song You Listened To. 

Most Girls by Hailee Steinfeld, honestly this song is such a bop n it makes me !!!!!!!

(5) What Is Your Favourite Colour? 

cerulean blue and yellow

(6) Relationship Status. 

taken !!

(7) What Is The Temperature Right Now? 

78F !! it’s nice n cool, thanks Harvey

(8) Did You Wake Up Cranky? 

probably

(9) How Many Followers? 

3,933

(10) Zodiac Sign. 

aries

(11) What Is Your Eye Colour? 

green

(12) Take A Vitamin Daily? 

no

(13) Do You Sing In The Shower? 

no but i dance sometimes lol

(14) What Books Are You Reading? 

furiously happy by jenny lawson lmao i keep forgetting im reading it though so i haven’t gotten very far

(15) Grab The Book Nearest To You, Turn To Page 64, Give Me Line 14. 

“Sometimes she wondered if the shape of his eyes effected how he saw things” - this sounds bad out of context

(16) Favourite Anime?

rwby

(17) Last Person You Cried In Front Of? 

caitlin

(18) Do You Collect Anything? 

hats, i used to collect stuffed animals, bouncy balls and littlest petshops when i was a kid though lmao

(19) What Did You Have For Lunch? 

chicken bites from whataburger

(20) Do You Dance In The Car? 

definitely

(21) Favourite Animal?

i like grizzly bears and bunnies

(22) Do You Watch The Olympics? 

yes my family and i get into them usually

(23) What Time Do You Usually Go To Bed? 

lately like 1:30 AM but hopefully earlier tonight since i have school in the morning lmao kms

(24) Are You Wearing Makeup Right Now? 

yeah i need to take this shit off i am ready for beddd

(25) Do You Prefer To Swim In A Pool Or The Ocean? 

pool

(26) Favourite Tumblr Blog? 

slimetony

(27) Bottled Water Or Tap Water? 

bottled

(28) What Makes You Happy? 

i’ve been really into watching slam poetry videos lately

(29) Post A Gif Of What You’re Currently Feeling Right Now. 

(30) Do You Study Better With Or Without Music? 

depends on my mood but usually without or if it’s chill songs that i’ve heard one million times before so i can just tune em out

(31) Dogs Or Cats? 

dogs

(32) If You Were A Crayon What Colour Would You Be? 

a bright obnoxious yellow

(33) PlayStation Or Xbox. 

xbox

(34) Would You Swim In The Lake Or Ocean? 

yeah i’d swim in both, i enjoy lakes a lil more than the ocean though

(35) Do You Believe In Magic? 

no

(36) What Colour Shirt Are You Wearing? 

a light gray sweater

(37) Can You Curl Your Tongue? 

no but i can make it do that clover thing

(38) Do You Save Money Or Spend It? 

save unless i’m really sad and have free time bc in that case i buy myself $70 of new clothes to make myself temporarily feel better

(39) Is There Anything Pink Within 10 Feet Of You? 

a coloring book w a pink cover

(40) Do You Have Any Obsessions Right Now? 

wouldn’t say obsession but i’ve been really into blackbear’s music, the my favorite murder podcast, videos of people exploring abandoned places and hi-chew candies lately

(41) Have You Ever Caught A Butterfly? 

yes i caught a monarch one time when i was little and i accidentally touched its wing and my mom told me if i touch their wings they could die and i cried about it

(42) Are You Easily Influenced By Other People? 

yeah lol i try not to be but i definitely have no idea how to be my own person at all whatsoever. no clue who i am

(43) Do You Have Strange Dreams? 

i had one where i was shot in the back of my workplace and died kinda recently and it really freaked me out bc i’ve never had a dream that i died in so i’ve been doin a lot of research about the meaning of dreams lately lmao

(44) Do You Like Going On Airplanes? 

i enjoy airports and being on planes but not after the initial excitement is over and then you have to wait for like 5 hours 

(45) Name One Movie That Made You Cry. 

i cried like a baby when i watched hachiko

(46) Peanuts Or Sunflower Seeds? 

sunflower seeds for sure

(47) If I Handed You A Concert Ticket Right Now, Who Would You Want The Performer To Be? 

blackbear

(48) Are You A Picky Eater? 

nah i don’t think i’m that picky, i will try just about everything

(49) Are You A Heavy Sleeper? 

i want to say no but i have slept through a fire alarm before so idk. it takes me forever to fall asleep though it’s the worst

(50) Do You Fear Thunder / Lightning? 

not at all

(51) Do You Like To Read / Write? 

i love writing even though i don’t think i’m all that good and i used to love to read but now i just have depression

(52) Do You Like Your Music Loud? 

yes unless i’m feelin overwhelmed then i like a nice soft playlist of chill music. i’m listening to the lumineers’ cleopatra album real softly right now and it’s so nice

(53) Would You Rather Carve Pumpkins Or Wrap Presents? 

i’m bad at both but probably carve a pumpkin

(54) Put Your Music On Shuffle, What Is The First Song That Came Up? 

destroyer // saint motel

(55) What Season Are You In Right Now? (Weather)

summer

(56) What Are You Craving Right Now? 

takis lmao idk why i’ve been intensely craving those lately bc they always make me so sick but they’re sooooo good

(57) Post A Screenshot Of Your Tumblr Feed. 

nothing nsfw tonight

(58) What Is Your Gender? 

female

(59) Coffee Or Tea? 

coffee

(60) Do You Have Any Homework Right Now? If So, What Is It About? 

school hasn’t even started for me but i still had homework today lmao i finished it a few hours ago but it was a quick quiz over the syllabus for history. if you did it before the class met you got 1 point added to your overall grade at the end of the semester and i’m bad at history so you know i was all over that

(61) What Is Your Sexuality? 

bi but probably gay i really don’t know i never experimented quite enough

(62) Do You Make Your Bed In The Morning? 

no i don’t believe in that

(63) Favourite Pokemon? 

espeon

(64) Favourite Social Media? 

instagram

(65) What’s Your Opinion On Instagram Stories? 

they’re fine i just always forget to watch them or use them. i like the boomerangs though

(66) Do You Get Homesick? 

i mostly just miss having time by myself in my room to just chill

67) Are You A Virgin? 

no

(68) What Shampoo And Conditioner Are You Using Right Now?

idk pantene something and it smells so good

(69) If You Were Far From Home And Needed To Sleep For The Night, Would You Choose To Rent A Crappy Motel Room For $60 Or Sleep In Your Car For Free? 

probably the motel, i’d feel safer

(70) Are Both Of Your Blood Parents Still In Your Life? 

yes

(71) Whats The Next Movie You Want To See In Theaters? 

It!!! i wanna see it with my brother realllll bad

(72) Do You Miss Your Ex? 

not oooooone bit

(73) What Is Your Favourite Quote Right Now?

"look. life is bad. evryones sad. we're all gona die. but i alredy bought this inflatable boumcy castle so r u gona take ur shoes off or wat"

(74) What Eye Colour Do You Find Sexiest? 

i mean i wouldn’t say sexiest i think that depends on the person but i feel like brown eyes are jus like, deeper u know. i love em

(75) Did You Like Swinging As A Child? Do You Still Get Excited When You See A Swing Set? 

yes yes

(76) What Was The Last Thing You Ate? 

some lays limon chips bc i didn’t eat enough dinner

(77) What Games Do You Have On Your Phone? 

flow, gin rummy (my personal fave), 1010, gardenscapes, tiny tower, tripeaks, snake vs block, ballz, adcap and this morning i downloaded dumb ways to die and roll the ball bc i am bored w the games i have and wanted to play smth else

78) Would You Give A Homeless Person CPR If They Were Dying? Why Or Why Not? 

i would if i knew CPR but i do not so i would try to find someone that does so i don’t waste time trying and doing it wrong

(79) Been On The Computer For 5 Hours Straight? 

yeah probably but i don’t do that so much anymore

(80) Stalked Someone On A Social Network? 

not like stalk in the bad way but i’ve checked up on people and i’ve done some digging before

(81) Do You Like Meeting New People? 

it makes me anxious but i really like meeting new people 

(82) Do You Wear Rings? If You Do, Take A Picture Of Them. 

i just wear this one!! it’s my gf and i’s promise ring, she got em for us as our 1 year anniversary gift and i wear it every day

(83) Do You Sleep With Your Bedroom Door Open Or Closed? 

closed !!! 

(84) What Are Three Things You Did Today? 

1. i had lunch with my girlfriend 2. i picked my brother up from school and we talked shit 3. i had a full blown panic attack about school being tomorrow

(85) What Do You Wear To Bed? 

usually just underwear but if i’m cold i’ll wear a big t-shirt too

(86) List All Of Your Different Beauty Products You Have Right Now. 

(87) Are You A Day Or Night Person? 

night

(88) List All Of Your Video Games On Your Phone, Console Etc. 

answered the phone on already but i have sooo many games bc my brother plays a lot of videogames lmao but i have an xbox 360, an xbox one, a playstation 2, and a wii and i have a ton of games for each of those that we’ve collected overtime lmao, plus some for our old PC and i also have access to everything my brother buys on steam. out of all that i only really play call of duty, LA noire, GTA V, just dance, harvest moon for wii ?? that’s it lol, i’ve been meaning to play life is strange and gone home and the wolf among us though

(89) Tell Me About A Dream That You Had And When It Happened. 

had a really bad nightmare recently that someone was robbing my workplace and killed my best friend, Caitlin and my brother in front of me and then we went on business as usual like nothing happened and it was so scarring i honestly only think about that when i think about my dreams anymore

(90) Favourite Soda Drink? 

coke

(91) What Sounds Are Your Favourite? 

i like real ambient upbeat music that you’d listen to on like a road trip or smth

(92) Do You Wear Jeans Or Sweats More? 

jeans but only bc my favorite pair of sweats got bleach all over em and i keep forgetting to go buy some new ones

(93) How Do You Look Right Now? 

like an undercooked fish fillet

(94) Ever Had Any Suicidal Thoughts? 

oooooooo boy have i

(95) Name Something That Relaxes You. 

soft music, driving, my girlfriend when she talks real gently to me n rubs my back

(96) What Tattoo Do You Want? 

right now i am tryin to decide if i wanna get a big ol B&W half-sleeve of sunflowers on my right arm

(97) Favourite YouTuber? 

still love grace helbig a lot bc she’s funny n i have a crush on her but i’ve been binging elijah and christine so much lately

(98) Post A Picture Of Yourself. 

this was me yesterday when i let my hair do it’s natural thing and i looked like a lion. i was into it though

(99) Do You Have Any Illnesses? 

my brain is not a good one but thas ok it happens

(100) Favourite Place To Relax? 

my room or my car

[pomegranctes]

u could stop at 5 or 6 stores... or jus 1

vesper ophelia reeve !

this is vesper my mc’freakin BABY.......

hayley law fc whom is not a tragic ass shit full of teenage angst despite that bein my speciality bcos i lov torturing my chars xDD

was raised by two hippie, nirvana searching, lush loving moms who cherished and loved vesper after finding her abandoned in a stroller at stanley park </3

despite being adopted and left on a huge fricken island she really doesn’t feel any resentment towards her birth parents ? she jus p much feels indifferent like isn’t in any rush to meet them and is jus content with where she is rn so don’t count on any philo soul searching

so like i said her moms were hella hippie and vegan and socialist and true believers in becoming one with the world, saving it, etc like they were jus super passionate bout making everything a better place and after adopting vesper that need only intensified as they wanted the best for their lil girl<3

like her parents, she grew up super healthy and earth loving and all-in-all an advocate for peace on earth and all this

it was NAWT easy to make friends tho bcos she was always the weird girl who only ever had thrift shop clothes ( before it became a #trend and was jus a sign of how broke u were xDD ) and never wore makeup but being the toughie she is, she stuck through it without complaint

she still shops at the thrift store tho bcos capitalism

attempted to have a rebellious teen stage after watching thirteen and took up smoking, ate some meat, pierced her nose, and did all this stupid stuff to fit in with everybody else but knew it wasn’t her crowd so she gave that up pretty quick and chalked it up to a learning experience

after graduating, with a heavy heart she said good bye to her moms and took off her london to study environmental law and she says it’s to save the bees and all this and convinces herself that’s why but she’s got an ulterior motive which p much just to have a mc’blast in london but her whole “i am above insouciance, all for the greater good, etc” mindset makes her feel almost guilty about it

since being in london tho she’s seen some things, learned some things, is p much now realizing that wanting to have fun for herself without the whole vegan guilt catching up to her isn’t that bad??? she knows that u gotta put urself first huns Xx

has a bubbly and approachable exterior but lowkey inside she still gets self conches about being the weird girl and will have these bouts where she doubts every fricken friendship she’s ever had

loves trying new things all the time and even if that restaurant you ate at last week gave you the shits but the food was good she’ll take the risk of food poisoning just to have that experience

is hella quirky but not in a bella thorne licking gregg skulkin way more in a hippie who listens to the weirdest music and loves orange pulp

works as a radio host for imperial college where she talks philosophy, feminism, and plays indie rock trash

leeder matheus sousa !

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zU13Ql0HRJc

i was not memeing around when i said that i was gonna make a rudy cult leader muse after watching that vid

his name is leeder but prefers people calling him leeds bcos even he can see the disgustign pun

grew up in vegas to some major gambling parents who ran off to sin city for a good time but got caught up in the fancy lights and found that they jus couldn’t leave ? eventually got knocked up and had leeder and would you know it, he was named after a slot machine

his life fluctuated from dinners at upscale restaurants to panhandling outside a casino and p much grew up having to take care of himself all the time what with his parents gone all the fricken time wasting their money

he tried confronting them about it once but things got out of hand too quickly and he ran away from home for a week but his parents hardly noticed his absence the times that they were home and just figured he was in his room or at a friend’s

at 15 he knew he had no savings or anything, he figured as much with his parents, so ever since his first job he started saving up whatever money he could in some last ditch self preservation

at 17 now he runs away just to see what would happen and he isn’t that shocked when there’s no milk carton portraits and no breaking news stories about a missing kid in vegas but some small part of him still held out that hope and was resentful for it

that stunt hella shaped him and hardened him and ever since then, he grew up bitter and spiteful and is p much hella self preserved and will almost always do whatever is best for himself even if other peepz are collateral

so anyway at 22 he basically formed his own cult :P he would scout and pick up these lost runaways and tell them all about “finding themselves” and all this load of bs and got them to believe they were leaving behind their old messy lives in favour of a sort of paradise which was p much just them being high off their minds a good amount of the time and strumming some shit music around a bonfire while they slept in tents outside his own decked out bungalo

so yea he got this cult going and on the low was dealing w some hella drugs and trafficking p much anything and everything and then disater strikes, shit hits the fan, there’s people after him, the whole lot which drove him to leave the country and come to london, hence why he’s here now :P

he still got some connections so he used those and got back into the whole drug thing and is now jus trynna find some new recruits to join his cult ( plot idea mayhaps :P )

hudson kirk schrader !

nickname is schrader but feel free 2 call him hudson, he jus goes w the flow :P

honestly been watching too much fricken workaholics

he’s deadass 100% blake and so catch me copying and pasting his bio

a hella burnout who faked some bullshit illness he searched up on wikipedia and got a medical marijuana lisence for it. how he pulled it off exactly is still unknown, even to himself ( believe it or not, he was high when he did it )

grew up in rancho cucamonga his whole life and the only time he saw outside of it was the one roadtrip he took to los angeles but he surprisingly hated it and he says its bcos the city is too big but he knows it’s bcos some guy he met at the beach called his sandals ugly and people laughed

his parents divorced when he was like 9 so he’s got two younger half siblings but he only sees them like once a month. he doesn’t mind though, they’re all p close and there’s not some family vendetta or anything lolz his parents still get along and all that

despite being stuck there though, he made the most of his small city life and grew up with a positive outlook on everything like u really cannot catch him thinking the glass is half empty

lives for the weekends. only works as a telemarketer/salesperson and yea it’s a shit job with no time off and a poor salary but does he care ? as long as it’s enough to keep living, he’s content

diet p much consists of cheap beer and delivery pizza. ihop breakfasts when he’s feeling rich or p much jus craving pancakes at 3am

took a stripper class one time for the sicc experience but he tells everyone it was to look at half naked peepz

can and will shove an entire party platter of sliced salamis that fell on the floor into his mouth if it means he’ll make some money off of it, even if it’s only $5 bcos hey, that can at least cover his tab at the bowling alley

he's the guy at the party who makes a massive cheese and cracker sandwich called the eliminator

enjoys pitting people against each other but not in a shit ass annoying naslund way or a devil reincarnate lourdes way more in a “hey what’ll happen if i do this” knowing dam well what will happen but going for it anyways

strange personality makes him interesting and fun 2 hang with but also a lil bit misunderstood bcos he jus trynna b himself </3

is a good friend who’s willing to take risks and try new things and he’ll trick u into joining him for a night you’ll never forget mostly bcos of the tattoo and the scar and the croatian wife u now have

a weirdo w self confidence who can pick up on that rude thing u said about his mom but spends too long thinking of a slick comeback and by the time he figures it out the conversation has already taken four different turns

understands human psyche and knows that u lose a woman when u forget 2 cherish her but honestly he’s always there if u need a pal to lean on and he will do anything in his power 2 make sure ur okay

spends his off time people watching on top of his house. deadass has got lawn chairs, a cooler, and everything set up on there and even after breaking his collorbone when he fell off, he refuses to listen to the safety concerns of his neighbours and p much the general public

truly has no story for how he got to london, jus decided to pick up and leave one day and is p much living the same life he lived in america but different setting :P

[asap-679]

Your not obligated to love ur family just because they raised u.

No one is going to see this luckily and I don't ever use tumblr as like personal blog? But I really needed to get this out and none of u know me. My step mom hated me ever since I was ten she constantly insulted my weight told me i was a women of the street because she didn't like my friends and she was just nothing but rude. I was 10 when my dad married her and somehow I was already hated by her. 7 years later I remember the day I got into a fight with my step mom because I was defending my dad. She was crazy calling him things and when I stepped in she told me I sleep with men for money. (I was raped a couple months earlier and she kept telling people I slept with someone for money because she doesn't speak English and didn't understand the story) anyways Things escalated and I went to my room and all I saw was literally red I felt my chest tighten up and my body just flared with anger. I threw my chair and my makeup container and just everything my hands found went through the air crashing on the floor some hitting the wall before landing. Nothing graceful just pure destruction. My step mom had taken my dads phone (to see if he was cheating) and in my pure anger tantrum my dad ran upstairs checking to see if I was okay. I calmed down. I went to Facebook and posted how if u ever get married be sure you know the person because your stuck with them for the rest of your life. My aunts commented asking if I was okay. My step mom having my dads phone insulted them on Facebook. I took two deep breaths and like that I was filled with rage again. I went out and told my dad how I hated his wife and she came out and said something to me. It didn't matter what she said in the moment my ears were ringing. I told her she was trash for everything she had done to me. She was dirt on the floor beneath me. Okay back track again she is 3 months pregnant. She came at me and attacked me she hit me and scratched me I still have the scar. I kept my hands behind my back and my dad ran behind her and just hugged her from behind as to get her hands away from me he lifted her and walked her to their room. All that happened in like 30 seconds and when he was pulling her away I was scared that he was going to hurt her so I ran to them and told him to get off of her. But he was just calming her down. I didn't know so he pushed me away. I went and grabbed my bags and my phone. He stopped me because he thought I was calling the police. I yelled fuck you and that was the first time I cussed at him. I was at the top of the stairs when I was just slapped so hard on the face by him I had blood already from the scratch my step mom left me I was a mess. I tripped over one of my bags and fell down the whole flight of stairs. I was screaming tears I was hysterical. My step mom decided that was the time to leave with my two brothers. And I found myself crouched behind my living room couch. I see my dad and nothing can come out besides don't touch me don't come near me. I mentally went through what just happened and I thought I was trapped I felt my body weaken and I felt I couldn't escape. The look on his face I can't forget he look so apologetic and sad I've never seen my dad cry but I saw his eyes with tears. He tried to comfort me to make me calm down but whenever he got close I found myself still yelling don't come near me. Once I got a hold of myself it all came to me the pain in my heart just like an explosion went off in my chest. We both sat down and I told him I was going to leave and he tried to tell me it wasn't a good idea but at that point any opinion he had didn't matter to me. I got into my car that night and drove away. Crying on the freeway listening to dark times by the weeknd on repeat. I was 17 and that was a week before my 18th birthday. Since then I forgave my dad but never forgot. That happened two years ago almost 3 years actually and I still see it in my head like it happened 30 minutes ago. This is just one thing that happened to me out of what seems like endless misfortunes. For some reason I just can't let it go. Maybe typing it out and just leaving it here will do something I'm not sure. This post is a mess I know sorry about that.