#when do I get a break
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vincent……valentine………im gonna pass out
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Husband has orientation today for an overnight shift he accepted at target.
He did this same job from 18-23 years old. So he knows what he’s in for. Except this is a much smaller target than his old one. So should be easier??
He’s been “excited” for it up until 1 hour before he had to leave, picking a fight with me over the way I did the bun in his hair after he asked me to do his hair for him 😑🙃
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“I’m just gonna kill myself”
That won’t solve any problems.
“It’ll solve mine”
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Last night we had this big talk about me quitting my job and me doordashing/working on sewing things harder/getting more time with the kids/finding something work from home, since he’s got a full time job.
It’s clear that’ll probably never be the case.
I’m so tired. I saw a glimmer of hope last night.
Today it’s like someone extinguished the tiny flame with their spitty fingers.
#I’m so tired#tired#I have a literal stress rash currently#I feel like I’m allergic to my own body#when do I get a break#having a partner with mental illness is hard#never ending
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I think it’s criminal I’m having an amazing hair day while I’m sick?? I feel like dog shit 🥲
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I just wish I could just be very successful at 1 single thing, instead of just passable at lots of things.
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The manga industry, especially JUMP, needs to hurry up and do away with weekly scheduling for mangaka. There needs to better regulations put into place for their health and safety because this is pitiful. Two weeks - monthly updates should’ve already been the standard for the manga industry at this point. These money grabbers will only continue to put the lives of these artists at stake for the sake of capitalism unless some serious changes are implemented.
#it’s just???#at the end of the day all these people want to do is draw and write their stories and share them with the world#why is death from stress the end game for so many of them#this should not be part of the package when finally deciding that this is what you want to do with your life#rambling#I still never got over miura’s passing man#and Togashi is still here but he’s been suffering from the consequences of overwork#it’s just… all so bleak#fans just need to learn to be patient if these changes are ever made and to be respectful#your fav series is not gonna die just because you can’t get it right now#I’m glad that gege does this now like he takes a break every 2-3 chapters and that’s good#this should be normalized
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every little thing is aggravating me today and I'm trying so hard not to be a bitchhhhhhhhhhhhh
#beachy hold music making me want to commit crimes#filtering through the 70 things i have had in my bucket for a month#looking at the 55 notes i need to write#looking at emails from the person who just got promoted to a major position here#but still cant be bothered to check my attachments for a second page#even trying to nicely ignore the person getting hired for the job i was passed over for being in our office right now is getting me#i need to eat i need a whole blunt and a nap and to be left entirely alone in a dim room#woke up to my cat pissing on the mat today its just been since i woke up ig#when do i get a break#a mental break or a break from work either sounds great at this point#vic van dyke shit
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For the twins in time AU, I genuinely wonder what kind of people the young twins grow up into because of Stan’s/Ford’s influence. Especially if it takes years for the portal to get fixed.
(Sorry if it seems like I already sent this question, I don’t know if it got sent the first time I asked)
I haven’t fully fleshed out how Ford grows up in the past but I do have thoughts on Stan presently
#he’s still his goofy brash self as well#but I do think he gets an outlet for all that through monster hunting and trips and stuff#he does get comfortable here though…#I’m thinking we have something play out that’s similar to the science fair#where they get close to being able to send him home and he breaks something or maybe even purposely sabotages it…#and I think he sneaks out a lot too#maybe he uses the secret identities in that way like when he’s in town he’ll pretend to be Pinley pinington#and that’s how he develops his scammy/improv skills#FORD ON THE OTHER HAND#I think he might actually be MORE emotionally stunted because Stan tries so hard to protect him#that it goes the other way#they kind of become reliant on each other in a really unhealthy way or maybe Stan sort of steers ford away from his smart stuff#to prevent the future from happening#not maliciously but yk#like I said I haven’t fleshed his story out as fully yet so I will get back to you#but there are some interesting possibilities#my art#ask#gravity falls#twins in time au#Stan pines#Stanley pines
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Cute wholesome fics where Stan teaches Soos or Wendy how to drive were always so funny to me because...
And while he insists that everyone in town has ran over McGucket before, we also know he ran over Toby too and absolutely did not give a shit (understandable in that case)
But then again...
Also bless Mr Honeypants
And another detail I love is that his car is casually filled with parking tickets
How many tickets are in Ford's name...
#i like to think that ford also sucks at driving#and that dipper and mabel are technically the best drivers despite only using golf carts#the bear scene always gets to me#him spending decades avoiding the town's weirdness while also being as weird as the rest of them#the coloring book page probably doesn't count as canon but i still love it#stan pines#stanley pines#soos ramirez#wendy corduroy#gravity falls#dipper pines#disclaimer: i do believe he taught them. i just think the stories should be framed more as a 'wHAT HAS HE UNLEASHED UPON THIS REALM'#stan: if you respect road laws and don't seek to break them at all times then you're dead to me#how did his car survive for over 40 years#oh for mr honeypants to casually still be in show after his debut....#also never forget about the golf cart short#it's dear to my heart#'remember kids always wear your seatbelt when driving your car into a ravine!'
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Monster John is something that can be so very special.
#malevolent#arthur lester#john doe#my art#his cape always looks so cool that's like the best part#but the mask always gives me trouble like its suppose to be a normal mask but the break makes a face shape but depicting that is hard :/#like he is a very inhuman creature wearing a costume to appear more human basiclly#if youve seen my “creepy John” drawing that's whst he looks like basicly but he is wearing a cape and a mask#also ive been trying to keep in mind that Arthur is indeed blind when i draw him so i hope that does come across here#the suit was also fun i did look at 1930s suits a bit more than i usually do but he doesn't get a hat cause i hate drawing hats
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[Abandoned by the Lightners, his heart became cracked with hatred.]
Hitting a lil' too close to home?
#junie art post#ink sans#error sans#utmv#errorink#implied. but yea not the focus#this has been turning around in my mind for quite some time. im glad to finish it lmao idk if my ramblings make sense even.#so like listen. do you ever think about how similar the function of the utmv is to the dark worlds in deltarune.#in a meta narrative to fandom sense? idk the word#we are making exaggerated expanded worlds of the ordinary tools and entertainment of the real world and make it into something more#isnt that very very interesting?#and we explore every sort of possibility in that creation. both good and bad#and when all is said and done. every possibility found and the entertainment and secrets has all run out#we put it away. abandon and leave it behind#what is left? what happens to the world and characters we have created? can it sustain without us?#what of the ones left in the dark?#idk if yall saw me a few months ago but i reblogged comyet's old post of ink begging us not to leave him alone and to keep creating#yea that never left me#and seeing exactly THAT SCENARIO in deltarune made my brain iTCH#imagine an ink in King's position.... wait isnt that just underverse#mmmmmmm. darkner ink.....#also error is here too. not just for errorink or that i can't separate these two to save my life#but error is also one of the few people to be able to GET IT?? he can hear the creators too. ink cant#but hes pretty much programmed himself to avoid having a mental break down to this via reboot memory loss.#and ink has his own internal coping mechanism (hooray for short term memory loss)#these two idiots will do anything but confront truths lmfao#ahhh my favorite idiots. never change#mmmmm#deltarune
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Dragons Rising really is the best sequel series for diehard Lloyd enjoyers, cause, yes, we acknowledge that he has panic attacks, crappy mental health, and also he's the grandson of God, but you know what really gets me? Lloyd is tired.
He's plagued with migraines (the visions are also migraines don't @ me), he's bemoaning about never getting a good nights sleep, hes struggling so hard to be a good leader and clearly doesn't have all the answers, and he's just some 20yo who's been cursed with saving the world since he was younger than his own students.
That's the realest way Lloyd could've ever been written in a future-series. It's what he is. But he's not angry (usually), he's not telling everyone to deal with it themselves, and he's not giving up. I love when Lloyd has finally had enough, but the real, genuine Lloyd? He'd never stop caring. He cares so much it'd kill him. He's tired and by god does he refuse to quit. I love that kid. Please get him a warm blanket
#ninjago#ninjago dragons rising#lego ninjago#dragons rising#lego#lloyd garmadon#ninjago lloyd#text post#look at me i LOVE when lloyd decides to go FCK ALL OF YOU. IM HAVING A BREAK.#or like he gets so mad he starts beating the sht outta people (which is borderline canon honestly)#i love him w anger issues but rn? when its been a few years in the future?#hes chiller. he still sounds mad angry sometimes (love that) but hes like no. im a hero#he doesnt say 'im the hero again. unfortunately.' he says 'unfortunately for the world im its hero'#he just wants to do good but he hasnt had 8 hours uninterrupted sleep for like 5 years#hes doing his best and hes spreading himself thin till he breaks and THAT my friends#that is lloyd garmadon#he only bites when hes pushed to the limit. and god does he hate being pushed to the limit#ANYWAYS
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are. are you telling me that if the romanced mage warden dies and alistair is king, he deadass stares greagoir down over her dead body and grants the circle of ferelden its autonomy after ordering it rebuilt somewhere safer. first you have to deliberately leave him behind so he won't die for you and then he does that for you once you're gone, even when you're broken up??? absolute and literal king behaviour of the highest order????? the actions speak louder than words of it all??????? I think I hauve covid
#that's the hottest thing I've ever heard I feel nuts#what an absolute chad alistair continues to be tbh there may be a day when men fail but it will not be when he's here#like I'm very sorry to the blond chantry boy repeat crowd but cullen could & would NEVER!!! they are NOT the same!!!!#dragon age#dragon age origins#alistair theirin#alistair x warden#can u imagine what it must be like to be irving standing there watching this happen. you're free and your kid is dead. congrats#tried to free her from the circle and she's the sacrificial lamb that bought the circle's freedom instead. fuck dude#it does make for a very sad kind of symmetry that every time irving tries to get clever with it he triggers a monkey's paw situation fhdskj#I am replaying the game with my new canon (mistress amell + king alistair to save him from the da:i fade choice lol)#and in doing research I found out about this and had my world rocked. I've never had my warden die before so this is new to me#(my warden isn't dying in this canon to be clear she's going to be the reason no one would dare assassinate king alistair lol#nightmare bae eminance gris behind the throne/loving and supportive partner with a fade connection and a vengeful side#she's going to be like sam vimes tiredly fending off assassins as the watch books go on except she murders a lot more people back)#the way his voice breaks in the version where they were broken up tho... sick and twisted and mean to me specifically
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Hello Madam. Sorry Madam.
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#lan wangji#madam jin#jin zixuan#jiang yanli#'Hey what is WWX trying to do here?' some kind of grab-and-twist maneuver that would be very upsetting to watch.#I know LWJ technically assists WWX in this scene in terms of blocking someone's blow on his behalf -#- but let's be honest. Real friends stop you from doing the truly stupid things.#Or maybe it was envy. Penis envy. The non-freudian kind.#Regardless...man this whole scene was just full of “and then someone else walks in”.#I swear to god every cultivator who is supposed to be hunting ends up wandering into this part of the woods.#a bonus for me because it gives me several good joke opportunities.#Madam Jin gets top prize for best entrance and exit. I wish her all the best. And a divorce…madam please leave him…#And can we please address the horses? I love horses. But why...why do they ride in on horses when they HAVE FLYING SWORDS?#I can only imagine it is for the dramatic flair? It just feels so jarring hearing someone clip clop in#and then another person swoop in on a sword.#The rules of mdzs's world can get fuzzy and I have to nod in an impressed manner at how much MXTX gets away not explaining.#Maybe the sword gets tired after a while and they need to give it a break? Maybe there is a sword union that dictates working hour limits?#…Would that make Chenqing a scab? Oh god it would… unions *hate* this flute!
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#messyr#artists on tumblr#vent post#vent art#tw sui ideation#being busy keeps me distracted as f from these behaviors and thoughts;#keeping distracted bc idfk how to get rid of the urges from intrusive and harmful thoughts#every scenario is just like: hey we can try attempting again today maybe we'll succeed this time!!!#then i'll be rational (focusing on the present) and go : nah cant bro we busy#got clients. gotta graduate. got people to take care of. got people waiting blah blah blah#the endless list where i never catch a break and maybe I've grown used to it.#i yearn death but i don't take its offer. I can't really leave. Not yet. not when there's still too much to do.
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