#when alison says mary is gone he says

[natjennie]

I love that no matter how many fucking times alison gestures to exactly where the ghosts are mike will still look up in the air for them. the fact that he makes an attempt to interact directly with them instead of just always looking to alison is so charming. but also adhd king.

[noel-fielding-web-page]

‘The fact that I’m still here is amazing’: Noel Fielding on Bake Off, booze and the Boosh

He has gone from cult niche to smash hit and he still can’t believe it. As Bake Off returns, the comic talks about his ‘feral’ upbringing, his party years – and the day Hammond fell out of a hammock

Noel Fielding’s highlight of the new series of The Great British Bake Off wasn’t a show-stopping cake. In fact, it wasn’t any type of baked goods. It wasn’t even a shot of a squirrel with outsized testicles. It was his co-host Alison Hammond falling out of a hammock.

“I’ll never be able to unsee it,” he says. “What I love about Alison – and I mean this with the greatest of respect – is that she’s an absolute klutz. If anyone’s going to fall out of a hammock, it’ll be her. She also fell backwards off one of the workbenches while showing off. Don’t worry, she was OK. No Hammonds were harmed in the making of this series.”

As the autumnal fixture returns to our screens, Fielding promises a 15th series on peak form. “It’s a belter,” he says. “There are some very special bakers in the tent this year. Somehow the standard keeps getting higher. These unbelievable young bakers are way better than they should be for their age. It’s a vintage year. One of the best yet.”

By stealth, the surrealist goth has become a Bake Off veteran. This is Fielding’s eighth series at the helm, meaning he’s now served a longer stint than original hosts Mel Giedroyc and Sue Perkins. “Who knew that was going to happen?” he marvels. “Maybe Paul Hollywood’s hypnotised me. I can’t escape the tractor beam of those blue eyes. I loved that original lineup, with Mary [Berry], Mel and Sue, as much as anyone. When me and Sandi [Toksvig] took over, we were terrified. We knew it was a massive risk. We said: ‘Let’s see if we can last one series.’ The fact that I’m still here is amazing.”

A family affair? … (from left) Fielding, Alison Hammond, Paul Hollywood and Prue Leith. Photograph: Mark Bourdillon/Channel 4

Toksvig later admitted “I felt my brain atrophying” after three series of glazes and ganaches. How does Fielding keep it fresh? “Sandi, as we know, is a massive brain. She went to Cambridge, she’s super-smart, she writes, she does politics, she needs to be stimulated. She never stays anywhere too long, except QI which is the perfect show for her. The difference between us is that I’ve always really enjoyed hanging out with the bakers. I befriend them and get them to open up. Nobody expected that to be my strength. I assumed it’d be the sketches and banter. In fact, I’m fascinated by the people. I feel protective of them. If Paul and Prue [Leith] are hard on them, I’m absolutely livid. It’s devastating when they leave. This year I was particularly fond of one baker. When I had to send them home, I cried.”

Hammond is his third co-host. “It feels like I’ve done three different shows,” he says. “First with Sandi, under enormous pressure but we pulled it off. Then with Matt [Lucas], which was a privilege because he’s a comedy genius. Now I’m enjoying it more than ever. Alison’s not a comedian, so she’s not as neurotic about jokes as I am, but she’s a brilliant improviser and instinctively funny. She slotted right in. Paul and Prue are very fond of her. Even my kids adore her. We’re having a blast.”

Judges and presenters refer to “the Bake Off stone” – a tendency to gain weight during each 10-week run. In her sophomore series, Hammond valiantly attempted to resist. “She tried to eat less this year but Alison’s quite childlike. She said: ‘Noel, stop me eating cake, I want to be good.’ The next time I saw her, she was literally like [he mimes shovelling in cake]. Alison has a good time all the time. You don’t want her to not be eating the cakes.”

Fielding, now 51, had a “feral” upbringing in Croydon. Hammond was raised in a Birmingham council house. He relishes these “two working-class kids galloping around Welford Park”, the Grade I-listed Berkshire estate where the marquee is pitched each summer. “If you’ve grown up in a working-class environment and go to a stately home, you’re like: ‘Woah! This is like Willy Wonka’s factory.’ We’re like urchins in front of Dame Prue. I permanently feel like I’ve come to sweep Prue’s chimney.” He describes Bake Off’s star quartet as “a funny old family”. Who’s who? “Prue and Paul are Mum and Dad, obviously. Alison’s the wild daughter. I reckon I’m the cat. Or am I the dog? Paul would say I’m the teenage son who’s secretly a vampire.”

‘We knew it was a massive risk’ … Fielding with Sandi Toksvig on the 12th series of The Great British Bake Off. Photograph: Channel 4/Love Productions/Mark Bourdillon/PA

The last time we spoke, Fielding reflected on his 00s era as a hedonistic scenester. “I took partying to its logical conclusion,” he said. “When you’ve been partying with Kate Moss and Courtney Love, you’ve gone as far as you can go. A few friends ended up in rehab. I was sick of partying anyway and lucky enough to have my family at the right time [he has two daughters with wife Lliana Bird]. It was like: ‘This is what I was looking for!’”

He returns to the theme today, pondering how Bake Off arrived at the right time. “When I got this job, I’d just had my first child, I was painting a lot and had a different lifestyle. This show fitted that phase. You want to match your career to where you are in life. It’s mainstream, family-friendly and my kids love it, so it suits me. I love not partying – and I never thought I’d say that.”

A fellow comic turned artist provides career inspiration. “I’d love to concentrate on art more as I get older. I love what Vic Reeves [Jim Moir] is doing, making art documentaries and his Painting Birds series. Vic and Bob [Mortimer] were a big influence on me. Now he looks genuinely happy. I’d love to do something similar.”

Claudia Winkleman jokes that she gets mistaken for Fielding. Does it happen the other way round? “I did see a trailer for The Traitors out of the corner of my eye and go: ‘I swear I didn’t film that.’ But no, Claudia looks like a beautiful 60s model. I look like a melted candle. A wax model of Roy Orbison that’s been left too near the radiator. It’s flattering for me but harsh on her.”

Earlier this year, Fielding scored a streaming hit with The Completely Made-Up Adventures of Dick Turpin. After wrapping filming on Bake Off, he’s off to shoot the highwayman sitcom’s second series. Has he learned to ride a horse? “I can get on and off, that’s all I need. Luckily it’s a comedy, so I don’t need to look impressive. One thing I enjoyed was that it’s made by Apple, so there’s a bit of a budget. With The [Mighty] Boosh, it was always a financial struggle to bring your vision to life. If you do fantastical stuff, you’re forever going: ‘We want an underwater race with people riding porpoises but that’d be all the budget gone.’ We’d end up using bits of animation to work around it. With Apple, they go: ‘Yeah, we can do that. Fine, let’s blow up a carriage.’ I’m like: ‘What, really? It won’t be a model?’”

He has formed an unlikely double act with Hugh Bonneville, who plays Dick’s thief-catching nemesis. “You can never predict who you’ll have chemistry with. I’ve learned a lot from Hugh. He’s a really skilful comic actor. And Mark Heap, who plays my dad, has the best timing of anyone ever.” As well as starring, Fielding has a writing credit. In the pilot episode, Heap tells him: “You always were a bit weird. Drawing, coming up with funny ideas, wearing strange outfits.” Was that line autobiographical? “I did write that scene, yeah,” admits Fielding.

Slice of history … Fielding (left) with his Mighty Boosh co-star Julian Barratt Photograph: Martin Argles/The Guardian

He also drew the amusingly rubbish “Wanted” posters that appear in the show. “I’d send them to the director and he’d go: ‘No, not bad enough, do another, make it more ridiculous!’ I’d end up doing them left-handed in about 10 seconds.” There’s even a role for his brother Michael, who played Naboo in The Mighty Boosh: “I put my brother in everything I can. He’s not only very funny but it means I get to hang out with him all day.”

While we’re on the Boosh, was he aware that this year marks the 20th anniversary of the comedy troupe’s TV incarnation? “Does it? Oh wow. Me and Julian [Barratt, his comedy partner] were proud of everything the Boosh did – the live shows, radio series, TV show. We probably should have made a film. People wanted more and that would’ve been a nice way to finish. Julian’s the funniest person I’ve ever worked with, hands down.” Of today’s comedy crop, he rates James Acaster highly.

Would the duo ever reform? “What we had together was so special. Comedy double acts are such rare beasts, like unicorns. I’ll probably never meet anyone like that again but I loved it while it lasted. We stopped at the right time, before the quality dipped. The Boosh was all-consuming, like being in a band. It’s difficult to recreate that when you’re older. You don’t have the same drive and energy. As much as I’d love to get back together, I wouldn’t want to do something that wasn’t as good.”

Going from Boosh to Bake Off has been an unexpected journey. “When the Boosh ended, because it had been a cult hit, I wanted to make something more avant garde and experimental to satisfy my art school side. So I did [Channel 4 sketch series] Luxury Comedy. After that, I didn’t know what to do with myself, then Bake Off came along. It was a huge curveball for me. I love that it’s old-fashioned TV. Millions watch it weekly. People come up and talk to me about the latest episode. It feels like being part of British culture. There’s so much choice now, thousands of shows on streaming, but shows like Strictly, Gogglebox and Bake Off somehow still cut through.”

After dismal weather all series, the sun even came out for this year’s final. “It had been raining and storming but as soon as we went to announce the winner, sunshine started beaming down.” Fielding grins. “Bake Off’s like that. There’s something magical about it.”

Guardian, 14.09.2024

[shebeafancyflapjack]

Sometimes I see people say Robin has been around so long that he's become "desensitised" to losing his friends, or that he's gained a perspective that we can't fathom but allows him not to have to grieve, and I don't think that's quite the case. That's what he tries to be, sure, he's trying to be Yoda "rejoice for those who go, mourn them do not, miss them do not' etc, but his voice still breaks when someone confronts him with supposedly not caring about Mary, he still says that he's in pain, and he's silenced when he sees her picture. The way Alison looks at him is like she knows trying to focus on the positives is his way of coping the same as Julian's anger and Captain's keeping busy.

For as wise as Robin is I don't think he's quite gained the status of say a monk who has achieved enlightenment. Every loss still hurts, he just can't allow himself to break down every time because it happens SO MUCH that he's already gone mad several times and can't let it happen again. It adds so much beauty and humanity to his character for me that he can admit he does still feel pain whenever he loses someone, how visibly crushed he is when Sophie leaves, he still "has a little cry" when he needs to let it out, and he does still form attachments to those around him even when they can't see him, just not to the point of being possessive. Ten thousand years hasn't desensitised him to no longer feeling loss. As he says, he misses a lot of people.

But he has to focus on the "more that come along".

[little-cereal-draws]

Button House dog rescue au pt 2

Alison and Mike turn Button House into a dog rescue instead of an event hall and the ghosts are the dogs they have. Just some headcanons abt how their life would be. Read pt 1 first for this to make sense

pt 1 pt 3

"bath time" is an all day activity that is also a fully body work out. Some of the smaller dogs like Fanny and Kitty are able to get baths in the sink and are the easiest to do. Fanny looks like a demon when her fur is wet and glares at everybody the whole time. Kitty will cry at the beginning but if she can take one of her toys with her, she usually forgets and has a great time

the medium to large sized dogs get to go in the bathtub (but not the Cooper's personal one). Whenever Mike bathes Julian he wears his swimsuit bc Julian has so much fun splashing around that the entire room is going to be soaked by the end. They have to keep the towels in the hall so they don't get wet too. The Captain hates bathtime and will do anything to avoid it. He usually ends up trying to hide somewhere but is never any good at it. Multiple times, Alison's found him just standing in the corner, tucking his head against the wall. He tries to climb out of the bath every two seconds so you have to use one hand to keep him in and use the other to wash him. He cries the whole time. Humphrey just sits down in the warm water and goes to sleep. It's like a nice relaxing spa. A few times Alison has come in asking what's taking so long and he's gone to sleep in Mike's hand. Mike doesn't want to wake him up so he just has to hold his head until he wakes up by himself

Robin's too big for the tub and just gets hosed down outside. He doesn't particularly enjoy it and will try to walk away if he can. Whoever's holding him in place also gets hosed down by proximity. The other dogs love to run through the hose and try to bite the water which can make this process take even longer

unfortunately, a lot of the dogs they have now are herding dogs (Pat, Thomas, and the Captain) and they will try to herd the other dogs, Alison, and Mike. There have been a few particularly disastrous occasions where all three of them had conflicting ideas on where the group should go and pushed them back and forth until everyone on the inside was confused and terrified of what was going on. The easiest targets are Mary, Humphrey, and Kitty but occasionally Julian will find himself lumped in too. Despite his tiny size, only Pat's brave enough to go after Robin and will nip at his heels until he listens. (Corgis are used to herd things ten times their size like cows and horses so he's not scared of a big dog like Robin at all. When it comes to herding, corgis fear no man and no god)

Alison took them on a fieldtrip once to a farm that had a bunch of actual sheep for them to herd and it was the best day of their lives. As they pulled up and saw the sheep, there were so many happy tippytaps and butt wags. Getting them out of the car was probably the hardest because they kept wanting to run over there right this instant!! The Captain especially; Alison had to say, "No, Captain, we're going to wait and we're going to stay" like twenty times which was a very disappointing number for him. She even had to push his butt down to get him to sit when it wasn't his turn which was very embarrassing… but how could he be expected to listen and follow orders when there were real live actual sheep right there, Alison!? He kept creeping forward one inch at a time when he thought she wasn’t looking

when it was Thomas' turn to herd them he was pretty good except he kept stopping to check if Alison was watching every five seconds. She was but he just had to make sure again

Robin has a bad habit of chasing birds and rabbits. Usually it's just for fun and he has no intention of doing anything when he catches up but on several occasions, he has killed them and brought them back to the house. He gets in huge trouble every time he does tho so he doesn’t do it super often. Alison and Mike try to figure out a way to use the meat either for their own food or the dogs’ so it doesn’t go completely to waste

Unfortunately, as they adjust more to being normal dogs, Julian and occasionally the Captain join Robin in these hunts. Julian is always very proud of himself when he catches something and doesn’t mind being yelled at. The Captain hates it so he usually lets whatever animal he’s chasing get away

Mike buys a remote control car and all the dogs chase it around the lawn. It’s a madhouse every time he gets it out. Robin, Julian, and surprisingly Mary are always in front followed by Thomas, Pat, and Kitty. The Captain tries his best and can stay near the front of the pack if he really wants to but because of his bad hips, he can only do it for short bursts before he has to lay down. Fanny never runs after it but loses her mind barking from the side. Humphrey tried to chase it the first few times they got it out but wasn’t able to sprint across the lawn at nearly the same speed with his little doggy wheel mobility aid and got left behind every time. He lost interest after he decided he would never catch it and just lays around while the others run now

Once Mike didn’t see him laying in the grass and ran the car right into his ribs. The Coopers will never forget the horrible yelp he let out. Mike held him and apologized the whole ride to the vet. Luckily nothing had broken but they did have to ice his ribs for a week. Mike felt so bad and gave him extra treats for a month. Humphrey wasn’t complaining lol

Mary likes to snuggle now. She didn’t used to when she first came but now she’ll try to climb in Alison’s lap crushing Fanny, Kitty, and usually Thomas in the process. She doesn’t understand she’s too big to be a lap dog. Alison moves her off and as long as she keeps petting her head, Mary will accept that

Pat follows Mike around the kitchen and “cleans the floor” as he cooks. He’s always too fast and close to the floor for Mike to grab the food before he can eat it. Mike's given up and will sometimes “accidentally drop” food he knows Pat particularly likes like cheese, tiny pieces of bacon, or eggs. This has to stay their little secret tho bc Alison will not be happy if she finds out

Kitty loves trying to play with Robin but Robin only notices she’s there abt half of the time. Their height difference is ridiculous and if Alison didn’t know Robin so well, she would worry that he’s going to accidentally step on her

Julian has peed in the house multiple times (he’s a jerk) but bc of the sheer number of dogs in the house, they can’t pin it on him for sure. He’s really good at acting innocent unlike Mary who looks guilty as soon as anyone's voice raises even if they're not even talking to her. Alison is suspicious of him but doesn’t have enough evidence and she’s determined to catch him one day

Alison balanced Fanny on Robin's back once. She looked terrified and started shaking with fear immediately. That was the end of that adventure

[ineffablelunatic]

What the ghosts do for Valentine's Day

Thomas - he sighs a lot. He waits by windows and doorframes. He basically follows Alison everywhere swooning. He writes even more dodgy poetry than usual. He is generally very annoying.

Humphrey - he hopes that his body will come past and pick him up. He doesn't really talk to anyone much unless they're passing through, but when he was alive he didn't have much romance, anyway.

Kitty - she loves valentine's day. She also follows Alison around, although for her it's more to find out about modern romance. She spends the whole day happily chattering about how lovely and romantic it is, and she tries to set up a valentine's day dinner (which fails, because she can't touch anything).

Pat - when he was alive he had fairly simple valentine's day traditions. He would go out on a date with his wife, maybe have a nice dinner, and that was about it. This valentine's day he decides to try and set up a love club. Most people appreciate it, but Captain clams up entirely.

Captain - he feels very melancholy all day. He's quieter than usual, and spends a lot of time staring out of the window. He refuses to participate in love club, saying only that he didn't have much of a love life.

Fanny - she spends the whole day complaining about how she never got much love from her husband, and then cursing George's name repeatedly. Most of the other ghosts try and avoid her, because she's in a very bad mood.

Robin - mocks the entire concept of valentine's day because he doesn't believe in monogamy. He talks about how when he was alive, he just slept with his sister (and everyone else) and never bothered with all this "romance" stuff.

Julian - talks even more than usual about his past romantic conquests. He's even more outrageous than he normally is, and only Robin bothers to go near him, as they share similar views on the tradition. Julian always went out with women other than his wife on valentine's day, and he sees no sense in the whole "flowers and dinner" thing.

Mary (gone but not forgotten) - when she was around she was content to listen to everyone else. Her own husband died shortly after their marriage, and they never really had valentine's day when she was alive. It was a small town, after all, and romance wasn't the same back then.

[ailendolin]

I just realised that Henry Morgan from Forever would have been alive at the same time as Thomas from bbc ghosts since Henry 1st died in 1814. Henry also lived in England before he was shot. The ghosts books says Thomas lived from 1796-1824. Therefore Henry and Thomas could have met each other. How do you think a Henry and Thomas meeting would have gone down?

It's been a while since I've watched Forever, anon, but it's such a wonderful show and now that you've mentioned it, I have to say I really, really like the idea of Henry having been there at Higham House on that fateful October day when Thomas was killed. I don't know why or how but just the thought of him being there, dimly aware of that dreadfully boring poet he'd been forced to listen to earlier challenging an officer to a duel over Mary Shelley but not actually going outside to witness it because hey, most of the time duels like this will be called off anyway. Until he hears a shot and rushes outside, knocking into people on their way back to house, gossiping about how stupid and unexciting the whole thing was, and finds Thomas under the tree, alone and bleeding out.

There's nothing he can do for him except hold his hand, tell him he's there, that he's not alone, that everything will be all right, so he does just that. And Thomas doesn't know who Henry is but as the cold creeps in, the warmth from Henry's hand feels soothing and he clings to it with all the strength he has left.

And then it's over and Thomas stays and Henry - Henry sees him looking at the other ghosts in confusion, the ones Henry's been trying his best to ignore all day like he always does when he encounters ghosts. He's learned quickly that nothing good ever comes from people realising he can see dead people so pretending they're not there is just ... easier. Except this time he smiles at Thomas and tells him again, "Everything will be all right."

After the shock wears off, he offers to write two letters so Thomas can say goodbye to his mother and Isabelle. It's not much but to Thomas, it means the world, and when Alison comes into his life almost 200 years later and struggles to accept her gift, he tells her to look up a Dr Morgan an reach out to him. "Trust me. He's an old friend, and he's like you. Well, somewhat."

[caps-clever-girl]

28 for Mike and bassment ghosts

questions from the ghosts ask game HERE!!! please send more i am very much enjoying these •w•

28: top 5 headcanons for [insert this character here]?

YES!!!! UNDERRATED CHARACTER QUESTIONS!!!!!! i fucking love mike, he deserves SO MUCH on this show, and kiell is SO FUNNY. he had me howling on taskmaster and he really is just playing himself on ghosts with a different name. LOVE the plague ghosts!!!!! i wish we had so much more (esp nigel he's my favourite), i loved them in the newest christmas special <3

MIKE

- adhd KING.

- mike is actually pretty good mates with julian and robin specifically - as good as you can be with incorporeal enteties you cant see or hear. he and robin both learnt a sort of morse code to communicate with general lights, and a stranger things system in one of the non-public rooms of BH. julian uses fridge magnets (word ones and letter ones) to talk to him, as well as keyboards. yes they often use their skills to take the absolute piss, but sometimes they INVOLVE him in their mischief.

- similarly, he can sort of communicate with mary? she walks through him if she really needs his attention, or sets off a smoke alarm (not the house ones, but extra ones they put at person-level). she always says good morning when he and alison come for breakfast :)

- even after he figures out the ghosts arent floating above him, he still looks up and away from them if they've been pricks just to piss them off.

- him and obi have known each other since nursery or reception. when alison married mike she FULLY understood that she was getting obi as part of the package. mikes parents ring obi every christmas and send him presents. they are like his second set of parents.

PLAGUE GHOSTS

- mick absolutely has a crush on cap after s4. cap is far too oblivious to notice though.

- geoff and jean are absolutely an item now. divorce wasnt really a thing back in their day? so geoff and his wife (lollys ghost) just kept on trucking until news of divorce trickled down to the basement (DECADES late) and they immediately were like "oh fuck this marriage." they're better friends now, and jean and geoff are happy :)

- speaking of jean, when walter left nigel behind during "about last night", jean absolutely tore him a new aresehole when she found out. nobody can stand a sad nigel and his big baby blue doe eyes.

- jemima isnt part of the plague pit. shes from a later plague, but she visits reasonably often because the basement folks are like her. she doesnt scare or disgust them, they're like a big family of uncles and aunts to her. however... she doesnt stay down there. she knows she makes the basement folk a little sad, since she reminds them of their own kids - none of whom have stayed as ghosts until the current time. so she drifts in and out. the basement folk are actually delighted by her visits and encourage her to stay more - yes, she does remind them of their long gone kids, and that is sad, but they dont hold it against her and love her company enough it doesnt matter. she doesnt quite believe them though :(

- nigel is very much a caretaker of the group. which is funny because ALL the other ghosts take care of him <3. especially jean. shes very much a mum of the group.

[hillvalleywrites]

4 & 9 :)

4. What is your favourite thing about Mike and Alison's relationship?

I love that they're both as mad as each other. So often in a sitcom you find the nagging, neurotic wife and the laid-back husband, but their relationship is not like that at all. Whenever it gets into moments that could be like that - Mike trying to hide the inflatable balls from Alison in 'Poached Guests' comes to mind - they subvert it, like Alison and Mike playing in them together. They're both sensible and they're both harebrained. And they clearly love each other and love their life together.

9. What are the 3 most touching scenes for you?

This was so so hard!

1) least surprising answer ever - In the Bleak Midwinter. I'm crying every time. Alison wanted to sing carols with her family - and she did! Thomas being the first to join her is one of the only moments where his... affection for her is thoughtfully included into the narrative, rather than being a tired joke. They all sound lovely together too.

2) Hard to pick just one moment from Gone Gone - I almost picked them all going back in and dancing - but in the end I have to go with Robin picking out Mary's star. It's such a beautiful moment, and one where we really get to feel the weight of time and grief, all the people Robin's loved and lost and memorialised.

3) This is technically cheating but I'm bringing these two moments together because they say very similar things. The first is in Perfect Day, when Pat gets to see Keith Darren Dean tie a knot he learned from Pat, and the second is in Its Behind You when Carol tells Daley he looks just like his father. My dad died when I was very young, and I often wonder what he would have taught me, what about me he would have seen himself in. This is also why I almost cried during the morning routine scene in The Grey Lady the first time I watched it, because I was taken out by Thomas listening to The Cure (my dad's favourite band). Does that count as a third moment? Sorry. But these moments with Pat remind me of the ways you carry someone with you after they die, or after you lose them in another way. You tie a knot and you think of them. You say the words they aren't here to say. You play a song they loved. The uncrossable gap between you collapses for a moment, or for 3 minutes 35 seconds. I love that Mike digitised the files for Pat, that they all got to watch them. I wonder if Keith Darren Dean taught his son that knot, if he told him about his former scoutmaster. There is so much of us made of those we have loved and known.

[thecrimecrypt]

Crimes That Shook Britain (North East)

John Darwin In March 2002, John Darwin, 51, paddled out to sea in his canoe near his Hartlepool home. He never returned Coastguard rescue teams and police searched for him, but all they found was Darwin's paddle.

Several weeks later, the wreckage of his canoe washed up on a beach. With no body found by April 2003, John Darwin was declared dead. His widow Anne and their two sons grieved. Until December 2007 - when Darwin walked into a police station, claiming to have amnesia.

John Darwin was reunited with his sons and Anne, who'd moved to Panama, was delighted. Only, a pjoto emerged of Anne and John in Panama, together in 2006. The couple had actually faked John's death to claim his £250,000 life insurance.

Both Darwins were jailed for over six years - him for obtaining cash by deception, her for deception and money laundering.

Michael Atherton New Year's Day 2012 - taxi driver Michael Atherton, 42, shot dead his partner Susan McGoldrick, 47, her sister Alison Turnbull, 44, and niece Tanya Turnbull, 24, at his home in Peterlee. He then turned the gun on himself.

His stepdaughter survived after fleeing via a window. It emerged Atherton had a history of domestic violence. He blamed Alison for his arrest in 2008, after a row. When he discovered Susan had gone out with her sister that night, he said there'd be trouble if he saw Alison at his home. He said he'd stay in a hotel.

Yet the women arrived home before he'd left. A row erupted and Atherton got his gun from the car.

Mary Bell On 25 May 1968, the day before her 11th birthday, Mary Bell strangled Martin Brown, 4. His body was found in a derelict house in Newcastle.

Two months later, Mary enlisted a 13-year-old friend to help strangle Brian Howe, 3. His mutilated body was found on waste ground. When detectives questioned local children, Mary and her friend acted strangely, their stories changing. Officers soon realised Mary was a killer.

The friend was acquitted and gave evidence against Mary. The court heard Mary committed the crimes 'for the pleasure and excitement of killing'. Mary Bell was convicted of manslaughter on the grounds of diminished responsibility. She was sentenced to life in detention, released aged 23, and given a new identity.

Raoul Moat Two days after being released from prison on 3 July 2010, Raoul Moat, 37, from Newcastle, went on the rampage with a sawn-off shotgun.

First he shot his ex Samantha Stobbart and her new partner Chris Brown. While on the run in Rothbury, Moat shot police officer David Rathboand in the face. Brown was killed, Stobbart injured and PC Rathboand blinded.

Police deployed armed officers in one of Britain's biggest manhunts. In a letter left with a friend, Moat declared war on officers, saying that he wouldn't stop 'until I am dead'. On 9 July, police tracked Moat to the river Coquet, leading to a stand-off. Police negotiated, but Moat shot himself the next morning.

Sadly, David Rathboand later took his own life.

Billy Dunlop - Double Jeopardy Pizza delivery girl Julie Hogg, 22, disappeared in November 1989. Eighty days later, her mother Ann found her decomposing, partially mutilated body behind a bath panel in Ann's Billingham home.

Julie's ex Billy Dunlop was charged with murder, yet juries at two trials failed to reach a verdict. He was cleared. The double jeopardy law (which meant Dunlop could not be tried again) meant he thought he'd got away with murder for 17 years.

Ann fought for double jeopardy laws to be scrapped and, in 2003. MPs backed changes allowing serious cases with compelling new evidence to be reopened. Dunlop pleaded guilty to murder in 2006, was jailed for life.

Gary Vinter = Freed to Kill Again Gary Vinter killed colleague Carl Edon, 22, in a railway workers' cabin in 1995. Vinter stabbed him 37 times, puncturing every organ. He was jailed for life, but released in 2006, after serving 10 years.

In July 2006, he married Anne White. But Vinter was recalled to prison after a New Year pub brawl. Released again in early 2008, he separated from Anne after attacking her at their home in Eston, Middlesbrough. That February, Vinter bundled his estranged wife into a car.

After holding her hostage at his mother's house, he stabbed Anne to death. He was jailed for life. In 2011, Vinter attacked Roy Whiting - killer of schoolgirl Sarah Payne - in jail.

In 2016, he received a third life sentence for trying to murder fellow 'life' Lee Newell behind bars.

[snapheart1536]

btw Why are you so interested in my project?

Have you ever been in that situation where you liked or disliked a character for no reason, not because you had any concrete evidence either way, just on instinct?

Or when the picture presented by everyone demanded the exact opposite reaction, but nevertheless you went on feeling this taboo like / dislike anyway?

I've got that strange leaning towards the 3rd Duke and I have no idea why.

Every book I have depicts him in a poor light, but somehow the idea I 'must' hate him, on moral grounds, has never sunk in, and I still felt positive towards him in a quiet, low-key sense.

I originally put it down to some blanket approval of Anne's relatives, but then, outside of her core family, I don't care about or even really like the paternal side, such as the Sheltons or Sackvilles.

A voice always said to me:

There must be more to it than this.

Perhaps it's merely a knack of mine where I just 'know' when an attitude or argument presented is 'off' in some way, even if I have no reason to disbelieve it and can't say at this very moment why I distrust it, but regardless I sense a lack of sincerity.

As an example, the first Tudor book I ever read as a child was Alison Weir's Six Wives, after which my favourites were Anne Boleyn, Elizabeth I and Katherine Howard.

Looking back, it baffles me how I made that decision, when she hardly says a pleasant word about any of them.

Somehow, every time I found a nasty remark, or supposed crime of theirs, though this was the first and only source of information I had, I thought:

Nah, that doesn't sound right to me.

So I ignored it, and later on found my instinct was correct, and if I have a similar attitude to the 3rd Duke, there must be something missing from the popular view.

A lot of the things he's known for don't make sense.

• Threatening to smash Princess Mary's head against the wall, yet she released him from prison and trusted him to face down Wyatt, even when it's a rebellion in favour of his great niece.

• The implication from that of being violent to his own daughters, yet Mary Howard took his side during the breakdown of his marriage, and he left her money even after she testified against him, so he accepted she had no choice.

• Thinking well of him means doubting the word of his wife, and I don't want to, but much of what Elizabeth Stafford says sounds like lashing out from deep-rooted heartbreak over him taking a mistress.

You don't hear of any trouble between them until that point, and her refusing a divorce, as in not wanting to be free of a violent husband, is what I can't understand.

If, as I say, it all does originate in jealousy of Bess Holland, he had to be better than his reputation implies to inspire that feeling in her, particularly considering the age gap and when she was so set on marrying Ralph.

• This idea he and Anne became enemies, but he cried when sentencing her to death.

Another confession reminded me of how his animosity towards Cromwell only becomes visible then, once she's gone.

The sentiment in me thinks the crowing the Howards did about bringing him down has to be more personal than just anger over the monasteries, even if they were affected by it, particularly when coupled with the hatred between them and the Seymours.

• Him being famed as THE Catholic peer of the age, yet he ended up with 'heretic' children, so any 'wrath' he had was plainly ignored by them.

Although he had to be quite the force if he managed to undo all Mary Howard's work and turn the 4th Duke and his sister back to Catholicism, which did 'em no good at all!

Then the mysteries and emotions:

• He's always shown as permanently old, a bit doddery even, but like his father, having to wage war when he should be putting his feet up, and STILL coming out in one piece!

How did he do that?

• He had an entire other family before Elizabeth came along, but every one of them died and is never mentioned, so he just got up and started all over again.

What was that like? How did he feel when they were all gone?

And the worst part is to think, had they lived, Henry VIII would wipe them out as Yorkists.

• Very early on in my Tudor obsession, I found a quote, I can't recall where, which said the 2nd Duke was a cold, distant presence to his son, so when Surrey was born the 3rd Duke worshipped him.

It's difficult not to conclude that, when both were in the Tower, Thomas had to wish he'd died first and Henry had been spared by the King's death, as living without him was worse.

The Howards and all the various offshoots are my main interest. Too many of them meet violent deaths and it gives them a gothic, quite romantic appeal. Each time I find the name, I know I'm dealing with an interesting character.

And they all look so alike! The dark eyes, red hair, long face and nose, high cheekbones. You can tell one right away!

If my central interest is the Boleyn end, about the Earl, the Countess, Anne, George and Mary, my second would be the Duke, the Duchess, Henry, Mary and Thomas.

So much about them fascinates me:

• Why did Henry throw his life away? How could he ever have believed he'd get away with it?

• Mary came to court as Anne Boleyn's lady and served all her successors EXCEPT Jane Seymour, and wouldn't marry her brother.

Some versions I've read doubt the closeness between Anne and Mary, but I wonder if her reaction to Anne's death was similar to Surrey to FitzRoy's.

How much resentment did she, did all of them, hold towards the Seymours, and how influential was Anne on Mary and Henry's religious beliefs?

• Had FitzRoy lived, would Henry VIII have tried to legitimize him, set he and Mary up as 'Plan B', or at least make him regent?

Just imagine the A.U.: Edward leaves the throne to him, so instead of everyone flocking to Mary I, it's the choice between an unmarried woman and a grown man with a family.

And Mary Howard's queen!

• Also, that Mary is technically the 'sister' of Mary and Elizabeth, but this isn't brought up at all.

• Bindon was there all along but is completely forgotten, yet in my head he had to met Princess Elizabeth along the way for her to give him a title, but when, why and how?

Totally ignored, yet he lived the longest.

• What about Katherine and Muriel? The 3rd Duke's Wikipædia entry won't admit they existed.

I'd buy books about them, but I've got no money.

I remember you followed me after I wrote a post on the 3rd Duke, so I associate him with you, and no one else here ever has a good word to say about him, if he is mentioned.

It'd make a change to see a positive post, and find out if that inexplicable feeling I had was leading me in the right direction all along.

[agents-are-dicks]

PLL (Pretty Little Liars) Rewatch Thoughts

Warning: spoilers, lengthy comments, that’s about it.

S1 E1:

•

Can we talk about Spencer when the girls woke up and both she and Ali were missing?! I know it could’ve just been shock or she thought it wasn’t that serious, but the way she says, “she’s gone. I think I heard her scream” is just so cold. Like should you not be even slightly freaking out a little?? I definitely considered her a suspect at first bc it was a little sus

•

Holly Marie Combs my beloved!! I swear I love all the moms in this show (Pam took me awhile tho)

•

Forgot that Aria’s brother (Mike?) played lacrosse. It’s funny considering Cody Christian was in Teen Wolf and they played lacrosse too. Is it really that popular in schools? (Did you know pll also stands for Premium Lacrosse League)

•

Byron (derogatory) Completely forgot about him cheating tbh. I just don’t like him or his vibes

•

Not Ezra saying he tried writing but didn’t get to far while the poster of Ali is up on the wall and he knows all about Aria bc of Ali and his book 🤢 l was really about to defend him this one time but then I remembered. It’s so predatory and 🤮

•

I miss short yet interesting intros like this

•

Okay but the way Emily says “we all know she’s Dead, right?” Like girl no wonder Aria looked at you like that acting all suspicious just like Spencer.

•

Aw. Aria assuming the rest of the group were still friends just gets to me somehow. It’s almost touching in a way.

•

Yeah “Holy crap” is right Ezra, but you still ain’t gonna learn , are you?! Ya creep

•

Not being able to see Mona in the shot just before first A text is just so *chefs kiss*

•

Ah, Melissa (derogatory)

•

Wren my baby. Poor thing has no idea of what’s to come.

•

“You know what they say about hope, it breeds eternal misery” by far one of my favorite/memorable quotes.

•

Oh Ezra, you should’ve just ended it right then and there.

•

The fat shaming in this show when the characters not even remotely overweight (I don’t think anyone should be shamed for their size in general but I’m making a point) is just so toxic. It’ll be a miracle if I don’t relapse.

•

Honestly the original Ian actor was so much more attractive than the one who replaced him

•

I know what I just said about fat shaming Hannah but having her causally pick the croutons out of her salad while talking with her mom is genius. It shows she’s still struggling with an eating disorder but doesn’t focus in on it. It’s subtle. Her eating disorder isn’t supposed to be known to the audience and yet this provides a sense of consistency. It’s a nice touch.

•

Emily saying she knew Alison was back and then the coroner coming about with the body bag is just so sad. My poor baby 🥺

•

Ezra you and I both know you have no right reason to be at that funeral. Also you know damn well she was a friend of hers. Just stop, turn around, and leave town now.

•

I can’t believe Ezria used to be my OTP. It’s so hard to watch now. She is 16 sir. Not to mention your student.

•

Such a dramatic ending to the first ep. Absolutely ICONIC.

Honesty this was fun. I might do more. It just depends.

[shebeafancyflapjack]

As much as I love the show, I do think character arcs - outside of the Captain - are one of its weakest links, but then again maybe there was never meant to be any? The characters straight up say in their final speech to Alison that "they can't help being who they are", sort of implying they will always be that way and any change they have is very minimal - and if they did change too much then they'd probably have moved on, such as with Mary who definitely became more confident and content with herself before she was sucked off.

Perhaps the focus was always meant to be more on the growth of the group itself as a family rather than individuals- because on that level it's (almost) perfect, the best slow burn forced to found family I've seen since Red Dwarf and the Good Place.

Because otherwise, as you say, some are pretty nonexistent.

Several times it's teased that Thomas is going to move on from crushing on Alison but never does.

Julian is the same amoral bastard as ever and I love him for it; though there are tiny changes like his softer moments and regrets over being a deadbeat dad, but we don't see much really come out of that.

Fanny overcomes her homophobia and learns to love Alison like a daughter, though again could have been shown better (hot take, I think the American equivalent improved that one with Hetty and Sam).

Pat learns to assert himself over Cap twice and I guess they are on more equal and friendly terms in later seasons.

Humphrey apparently needed to learn to listen more than talk but...did he? He's been a disembodied head for centuries, most of all he can do is listen, and we saw that he tried with Sophie but...yeah that's a whole mess I can't be bothered to go int but I really don't think they had much of a plan for him.

Robin is such a strange one. He definitely becomes less feral over the seasons, he's less of a prankster and seems to reflect more on what he's gone through, but again is that more audience perspective than his own growth? Its funny because one of the guys said in an interview that the idea of Robin learning how to feel Christmassy by doing a selfless act was to show how he's "matured like a child" over the past five years....which is such a weird concept for a man who is ten thousand years old, was a dad himself, and from the beginning was shown to be wiser and more empathetic than he appeared. I love the idea of him coming to enjoy Christmas because of Alison, but I don't feel like he was the one who needed to learn that lesson.

Who should have? KITTY!

My poor Kitty, what did they do to you, petal. They gave her such a great arc in the third season of overcoming her jealousy about Lucy and expanding on what she'd already learned in the season one finale about caring more about letting Alison be happy than forcing her to stay. But then we get the finale and we have her acting like a three year old who is dealing with having a baby sibling for the first time. Even though she's there with the guys telling Alison to leave, she's still clinging to the idea that they'll stay and has to be told by her father figure that they won't. Again one of the idiots implied she probably voted against it "for her own selfish reasons" implying there was no growth there at all, if anything she regressed. We don't ever get to see her and Alison talk things out and we never get to see her bond with her niece. Thanks, I hate it.

As for Alison, I guess her arc was "learn to accept your limits and quit when it's not working out"? Which to be fair, in her case, isn't a terrible lesson but it is a depressing one when we don't know what else she has other than being a mum (again, nothing against being a stay at home mum, I just don't think they built that up as being Alison's dream when we know how much she loved the idea of building her own hotel and being with the ghosts).

I’ve been thinking about character arcs and ghosts, and how much that’s varied across the characters. I think I should say upfront that I don’t have the best memory and there’s a good chance I’ve mucked up something here, but this is from what I can recall.

Some of the ghosts have had very clear across the entire show, like the Captian learning to accept himself/his sexuality and be a more open, kinder person, Fanny learning to let go of her rigid ways and beliefs, Mary becoming more confident, and Julian becoming kinder (even if he’s still reluctant to admit it).

Then there’s characters who’ve had vague arcs like Pat who learnt to stand up for himself a bit more (and be a bit of a bitch sometimes, affectionate). There is a change with him, but it’s not as obvious as with the previously mentioned arcs. There’s Robin who has had small arcs in various episodes (ie leaning to like Christmas, twice, I think), but not necessarily an overarching one, or at least not a very obvious one. His language improves over the series, but I when I talk about character arcs, I think of emotional arcs/personality shifts, so I don’t really count that. I would argue any change with as more to do with us getting more insight into his history and his mind which deepened our understanding of him than an arc, but idk.

There’s characters like Thomas and Humphrey who had no arc at all (understandable in Humphrey's case as he’s rarely present, baffling in Thomas’ as he desperately needed one), and then there’s Kitty.

I feel like there has been a change with her across the seasons, but I can’t for the life of me pinpoint what exactly and where she falls on the character arc spectrum. Honestly, this whole post is me asking what people think about this, if she did have a clear arc, a vague arc, or no arc because I can’t really and it’s bugging me.

[shebeafancyflapjack]

Another interesting difference between the UK and US versions, how many of the ghosts reacted to one of them being sucked off with jealousy, mainly Hetty and Alberta. Even in the following episode, they're both focused on going to extremes just to move on. We didn't really get that in the UK version. The closest we'd get was Mary calling people "lucky cow/bugger" when Annie moved on or she thought Robin had gone but even that was said with more of a "aww good for them" tone rather than bitter jealousy. Until she actually left she seemed almost content to have accepted she might not get to move on.

Even Robin, having been there for so long, says he's ready to move on, he wants to see what's next and he's obviously tired of being left behind and losing people. But we don't really see him being desperate or getting worked up over it. There's still plenty in the world for him to watch over and learn from. When he gets his calculations wrong he's just kinda like "oh whoopsie, my bad, anyway let's do that dancey thing you all wanted to do." Meanwhile the others are all scared or anxious at the idea of leaving, except for Kitty who is also excited to see what's next. But again none of them are disappointed when it doesn't happen; in fact they all dance together almost in celebration that they're all still together, Alison and Mike included.

Again I'd say that plays into how the feel of UK Ghosts is more like a family, it's a lot more cosy. Sure you want to leave someday but until you have to you're comfortable there with the people you love and just take as much time to enjoy them. That's nothing against the US version, I think their desires to move on are understandable and they clearly care about each other but again it's more like a close friend group were they're not quite as tied to each other.

[thatgordongirl]

Thoughts on Ghosts Season 4 - Part 1

Mary, Thomas, and Julian 

Disclaimer: There will be spoilers! If you haven’t watched season 4 already, @patcaps has it on his google drive on his blog. Also, before I get into it all, I want to say it was an absolute blast waiting with all of you, making content and keeping the show alive. I hope we get to have just as much fun with the podcast and future seasons, this fandom has a lot of heart that a lot of others have lost overtime. I think it’s because it comes from people don’t just love Ghosts, but the actors, their previous shows, the history, and the positivity brought to every second of every episode. 

Now, where was I? Oh yes, Ghosts. I think it’ll be best if every character is addressed individually as to go fully in-depth with each development and storyline. But talking about the season itself, I have to say there is something different about it compared to other seasons. I think it’s to set the stage for Alison’s rising tension in her marriage and with the Ghosts, maybe  it was preparing for Mary, either way, it’s storyline was a lot tense and melancholic, which you would expect from a show about dead people. 

It instilled a fear that I had forgotten purely because I thought they wouldn’t cross that line. They let a ghost pass on. I had considered it likely at some point, but I thought they’d do it together. Suddenly there’s grief and now there’s a worry about who’s next. It immerses you in the show whilst also building up tension and anxiety. If anything, I thought Robin would have passed on before Mary, maybe even Julian if he found closure. The show won’t be the same without her. 

Anyways, I don’t want to make this too long. 

Mary

She will be missed dearly and I was actually sobbing when she left. I kept waiting for it to be a fake-out, for her to come back and say the basket was only four potatoes high and Alison did it wrong. But she didn’t. She didn’t come back and it affected everyone. Thomas was had a selfless moment for her, Captain nearly cried and comforted Julian. Robin showed his own way of coping for those he’d lost, those he’d probably lose, and how his belief in the stars made it a little better. 

They all showed different ways of grieving for Mary. Captain kept moving and working, trying to distract himself. Fanny denied it and forgot momentarily, maybe he’d mind trying to protect herself from it. Kitty cried, Pat tried to make a comfortable lie. Robin deflected, Julian got angry. They are all different and equally fair ways of grieving. The show captured how everyone deals with things differently. 

Mary finding her voice and talking about her trial was the closure she needed. She told her story, she loved and she lost and she lived. And she’s gone. And it’s going to be hard, as silly as it may sound, to watch the show the same way. Because I think we’ll grieve a little bit too. But Katy Wix did a terrific job showcasing someone silenced learning to speak up and be her true self in the face of scrutiny. 

Thomas

I have to say, I’m impressed by his development throughout this season. It’s not exactly what I expected/hoped, but it’s the build up to more. His moment with Kitty in episode 1 where he tells her she doesn’t have to pretend to like his poetry felt like such a genuine line without him trying to garner sympathy, he really doesn’t want her to pretend. He does it for himself so much already. That being said, I also think it outlines another important relationship of his, with Captain.

Realistically, they shouldn’t get along at all, and they don’t most of the time, but they have similarities I feel they bond over. They both exhibit logical thinking and question Robin’s story, they share similar views on Julian. The Thomas and Pat interactions are very interesting and for a second I swore Pat was treating him like his son. Keeping him in the room and saying he was putting his foot down, Pat acts like a very insistent babysitter who lets you stay up if you’ll kelp him work the microwave. 

The best revelation that we kinda already knew but wasn’t addressed was Thomas making everything about himself. He doesn’t know he’s doing it, he’s just spent so much time obsessing over his work he thinks it’s the only way to operate. And when he realises he’s doing it, he doesn’t deny or defend, he immediately rights his wrong. He makes sure it’s about Mary, even cutting off writing a eulogy, the thing he obsesses over, and puts her above himself. 

Julian

I just want to say before anything, Julian saying Maggie during a time of vulnerability and telling a rare story is very telling. It’s one of the only stories he’s told that hasn’t involved one of his sexual conquests, even if it’s still not really part of his personal life since it’s still in relation to work. Julian feels more guilty about people than he lets on, we know he feels bad about his daughter, but he loved his wife at some point. At least I hope he did. 

Though he doesn’t entirely grasp being virtuous because he wants people to see it and that’s the only reason he does it. Captain did have a point when he said that there is a heart somewhere in Julian. Playing chess with Robin with the big board was hilarious. His way of grieving being anger made so much because of the way he reacts to being insulted. He gets defensive, and yells. Finally, his relationship with Alison is either that drunk uncle who comes around every twenty five years, or more fatherly. When they were scheming together I swear it was a father and a daughter. 

[raineydays411]

Trauma really does bond

The umbrella academy x teen!reader

Summary: It’s time for you to meet your siblings. But what happen when your introductions don’t exactly go as planned?

You were trembling as you walked behind Pogo and Grace. Its ironic, you’ve waited your whole life for this moment. To finally meet your siblings and expand your family. A childish hope of your siblings one day returning to the mansion and accepting you with open arms. 

But now that you actually have a chance to meet them, you’re terrified. You realized that you have no idea how to talk to people. It’s different than when you talk to Pogo or your mother. These are complete strangers. No matter how many stories you’ve been told, how many times you read Vanyas book, you truly didn’t know these people. How were you meant to be a family? How are you supposed to-

“Y/n? Dear?” 

You’re snapped from your thoughts by your mother calling you.

“Yes, momma?”

“Momma? Pogo, who’s that?”

You turn, again surprised by an unfamiliar voice. There she was. Alison Hargreeves. She’s beautiful. 

Her hair is curly and blonde, with beautiful high cheekbones and glowing brown skin. Her as were kind even as she squinted at you skeptically in confusion.

“Alison, this is Y/n Hargreeves, or Number Eight. She’s your sister.”

Grace again gives you a light nudge, and you move in front of her. It was then that you realized that you are shorter than Alison, having to glance up to meet her eyes. 

“My sister?” She looks at you in disbelief, “How come we didn’t know? This wasn’t mentioned by the press or anything...” 

“Your father decided to keep our dear Y/n a secret.” Grace said wrapping her arm around you, “ She’s been our little secret for 17 years and 4 months.” 

“A secret? But why? I mean, what was the reason?”

“Your father, believed that the world wasn’t ready for a new superhero. Nor was Y/n ready to face the world.” Pogo said with a grim face, “ He had hoped though, that one day he would be able to take her out...but it seems that for now, Y/n shall remain inside.”

You frowned, holding back tears at the thought. You didn’t know that your father had wanted to let you out, nor that he wanted to be there when you were. But, what truly upset you, was that you had to stay in the mansion. Freedom was at the tip of your fingers and you didn’t even know it.

“Stay inside? You mean she’s never been outside?�� Alison said horrified.

“Well she has been out in the courtyard and such, but Mr. Hargreeves prohibited her to leave the premises. Nor was she allowed to be in contact with the citizens”

“She’s been here all alone?” Alison asks sadly, “ With no one to talk to? No one her age?” 

“I’m afraid not” Pogo says sadly, looking at you.

You didn’t understand the big deal. Of course you were lonely, and wanted to explore the world, but you knew why you had to stay. You can just hear your fathers words.

“You have a duty Number Eight. A duty to your people and to me. It may not be ideal but sacrifices are hardly ideal.”

And everytime you thought about leaving, you’d remember his words and stay put. Besides you wouldn’t dare disobey your father.

Not after the last time.

“Well,” Alison says gently, leaning down to your eye level, “ Hello Y/n, I’m Alison Hargreeves, your big sister.”

Your eyes widened at her words as your heart filled with joy. For so many years  you imagined those words. You wondered how this whole thing would play out, how meeting your siblings might be. And to hear Alison so readily accept you, it brought tears to your eyes.

“Hello, Alison” You say beaming as you carefully step forward, “ I’ve been waiting a long time to meet you, Momma says you live in California, what is it like?” 

Alison smiles at your question, your demeanor like a small child. It reminded her of Claire...

“It’s very nice, maybe when we have time I’ll be able to tell you all about it.” 

Your smile widens as you turn to your mother excitedly, she smiles back and says, “ That sounds wonderful dear, but you should go and change. You know the rules. You don’t want your father finding you in your night clothes, now would you?”

You furrow your brows,” Momma...”

“No buts now march” She says with a grin. You smile at Alison but see the worried look on her face. 

“So she did notice how weird momma acting” You think to yourself. You stay in a daze as you walk towards your room. Worrying about your mother, grieving your father, and thinking about how you’re finally meeting all your siblings. Then as you turn a corner into the hallway that leads to your room, you’re knocked to the ground as you bump into a wall of a body.

“Ow!” you squeal as you hit the ground, rubbing the back of your head and peering up at the person you bumped into.

“Uh..sorry Y/n” 

“Luther!” You shout, your pain overridden by the happiness you felt at seeing your brother, one that actually knows you exist.

He helps you up, which to him is like picking up a feather, and  before he knew it, your arms are wrapped around his midsection. Luther awkwardly pats your back, not really expecting to be hugged.

“It's great to see you Luther! I read all your mission reports, or rather the ones that Father let me read. I always wished you good night though! Pogo always caught me looking at the moon with that telescope, I hope you don’t mind that I used it. It's just that I missed you so-” Your happy ramblings cut off by a Luther clearing his throat.

“Ahem...right, um hey Y/n, I gotta go...check on something.” He says gently pushing you away, “It was nice seeing you though.”

And with that he walks away, leaving you in the hallway as you stare at his retreating form.

“oh...okay then! I’ll see...see you later.” You say, disheartened by his brief acknowledgement. You sigh, walking into your room. 

“I don’t know why I try...” You mumble to yourself. “ It’s not like he was ever happy to see me before.”

You go into your closet, trying to figure out what to wear. Usually, Grace picked out your outfits, ordered by your father, but she didn’t leave anything out for you today. So, you settled for a black turtleneck sweater, a black and white plaid skirt, black knee high socks with some mary janes. It wasn’t really your go to look, but you felt like it was appropriate given the circumstance. You let your hair loose, curls falling into your face as you let it out of the bun you quickly put it in. 

You go to walk out of the room when you’re stopped by a gleam. You see the necklace your father gave to you after the incident. You stare at it, debating on whether you should put it on or not. You sigh, deciding to wear it, it was his funeral after all. You put it on, the cold metal never truly seem to heat up, the pendant heavy on your chest. You never grew attached to it. It just served as a reminder that you’re stuck in the mansion. You can never leave. Not until he let you and now...

You shake your head. Trying not to get into your thoughts, that's when you heard it. Little scratching at your window. You turn to see Despereaux, the little mouse  you saved when you were younger. Ever since that day it was like you and him formed a bond.

You open the window excited to see your little friend.

“Hello Despereaux, it’s been a while since I’ve seen you.” You whisper as you let him climb on to your shoulder. “ you’ve missed quite a bit since I’ve last seen you. How about some cheese?”

You walk out of your room, Despereaux nestled on your shoulder. As you walk through the long hallways, you bump into another body.

“Ouch, again?” You whisper to yourself, rubbing your forehead.

“Hey watch it...teenage girl?” A male voice said in a perplexed tone. 

You look up to see a man in some rather tight clothes and kohl ringed eyes.

“Hello” You quietly mutter with a soft smile. “I’m Y/n”

“You are adorable.” The man says, “ Where has the old man been hiding you?” 

You blush looking down at your feet, you were never really complimented. Only by Grace.

“ Aww” The man squeals, squishing you to his body. He smelled like booze and sweat but the hug was nice, “ I have no idea who you are but I’m your uncle Klaus from now on.”

“You’re Klaus?” You say excitedly, “ I’m so glad to meet you!” 

You wrap your arms around him, feeling the outline of something hard and metal in the back of his pants. You ignored it though, happy to meet another one of your siblings.

“Ugh it’s so nice to be around someone who isn’t a total stick in the mud.” Klaus says letting go of you, “ Like Luther, all that rage in that big body” 

You giggle at his words and eccentric behavior. It was a stark contrast to the ridgid stoic behavior that you’re used to. Klaus’ grand gestures and silly nature was new to you.

“I’ve heard alot about you.” You say happily, “ Mama always tells me stories about how you used to steal  her shoes and skirts and Father said--”

“Father?” Klaus asked, “ You mean ol’ Reggie bought you too? Or are you like..his offspring? Eww! I don’t want to think about that, shut up Ben.”

Ben?

“Father adopted me, I was born with powers like you.” You clarify for him. 

“Huh, so he managed to create another trauma case before he croaked.” Klaus said in a light voice, “Well. I always wanted a little sister.”

You smile, glad that at least two of your siblings liked you. But what did he mean by trauma case.

“Anywho, I have some... inheritance I need to collect. I, will see you at the funeral, das Kind” 

And with a wiggle of his fingers he was off, gone as quick as when you met him. Leaving you yet again, alone. You shrug off his odd behavior when you heard two voices speaking. 

“ah no, not to my knowledge.”

“But..the spine is broken and there's notes in the margins.”

“ Yes, that would be the work of.. ah Y/n, there you are.”

You jump in surprise, although you should’ve know. You can never eavesdrop with Pogo around.

You walk down the stairs, slowly towards Pogo and.. Vanya!

Out of all the siblings, she’s the one you wanted to meet the most. She, like you was isolated in this mansion. You felt a connection to her as soon as you were able to pick up that book. Your heart raced as you made it to the final step, reaching the first flower and into the living room where Vanya and Pogo were talking. You can see that she is shocked, as all your other siblings were.

“Pogo, who is this?” 

“Go ahead dear, introduce yourself. Just like you practiced.”

You smile widely, “Hi I’m Y/n Hargreeves, I love your book. I’ve read it almost five times now.  You’re Vanya! I’ve been waiting to meet you! You look exactly like the picture on the back of the book! It really is a good book, I-”

“Y/n, take a breath. Let her get a word in.” Pogo chuckled, glad to see that you’re comfortable around Vanya. 

“Oh, right. I’m sorry, father did always say I..tend to talk to much” You say looking down at your shoes. You didn’t notice the frown on both Pogo and Vanyas face.

“You...you read my book?” Vanya asked, still trying to figure out who you are.

“Yes, multiple times. It...well, besides the stories Mama and Pogo told me, this was the only way I got to know all of you.”

“Why didn’t you just come find us?” 

“Oh well..I wasn’t really allowed outside”, you say glancing at Pogo, “ Father said the world and I weren’t ready for each other.”

“You mean, you’ve been alone...all these year?”

“No, not totally alone! I had Pogo, and Mama, and and father too. Plus there were the robots he built, although I did destroy them...and the books and and..”

“Y/n...that’s..that’s not..” Vanya stopped herself. She knew that this must be a sensitive subject for you. The way you listed everyone in your life was practiced. Like you’ve said it to yourself over and over again. And by the grim look on Pogos face, she can tell it wasn’t only you who was sensitive about this subject.

“Well, Y/n..perhaps you should go on in the kitchen and help your mother. Your siblings will be meeting here shortly, it would be nice if they had some snacks, don’t you agree?” Pogo says, forcing a smile at you.

“Oh! Okay” You beam, “ It was nice meeting you Vanya!” 

And with that you scurry off into the kitchen, leaving Vanya and Pogo behind in silence.

“She’s been alone for...” 

“For seventeen years. Yes”

“Pogo...”

“You know your father...once he made up his mind...there was little I can do.”

Vanya sighs and pats Pogo on the shoulder, “It’s good to see you Pogo.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You skip into the kitchen, seeing your mother humming at the sink. You walk up to her and notice that she’s cleaning the same plate over and over again.

“Hi momma!” you say suddenly

“Oh, hello dear. What are you doing in here?” Grace asks putting the plate in the drying rack.

Pogo said it would be nice to make snacks for my siblings” You ask, then feeling movement around your neck, “Oh and some cheese please.”

You forgot Despereaux was on your shoulder, its a wonder that no one has seen him yet.

“hmm snacks we can do.” Grace says with a smile. She goes to the fridge and pulls out some cheese.

“How about some cheese and crackers? Its simple.” she says, “ ans Despereaux here can have his fill as well”

You freeze, caught again by your mother, “ Thanks momma.” 

You both giggle, and side by side you work on cutting the cheese and presenting the crackers. You feel a sense of calm wash over you. You usually do when you’re around your mother. She makes you feel safe. 

“Ahem.” 

You both turn to see Diego in the kitchen doorway.

“Diego dear, you startled us.” Grace said with a smile, “ Come help, we’re making you kids some snacks.”

He barely spares a glance at you.

“Pogo wanted me to come tell you that the meetings starting.”

“Oh, well go on darling, run along and I’ll bring out the snacks later.”

And with that she kisses your forehead and waves you away. She turns back to the  sink and starts humming again. 

You glance back at Diego. He’s glaring at the wall and to be honest you’re surprised he even waited for you. You pick up Despereaux and put him on your shoulder again, and grab some grapes and cheese then stuff it in your skirt pocket. Then you walk up to Diego with a small smile. 

He glances at you and scoffs, then walks away. You have to jog to catch up to him.

“You uh, you walk pretty fast” You say huffing a bit. 

He doesn’t answer you, he just keeps walking in the same pace. You stay silent as well, the trip to the living room longer than you remember.

You finally make it, and you see all your siblings in the room, spread out. You take a seat next to Vanya. You smile at her and take a glance around the room. Luther is sat at the couch across from you and Vanya. Allison and Diego are sat on some chairs, and Klaus is at the bar. 

The six of you sit in an awkward silence until Luther clears his throat.

“ So I guess we should get this started.” He says standing up, “ So I figured we can have sort of a memorial service. At the courtyard at sundown, say a few words. At dad’s favorite spot.”

You nod along and hear Alison speak up, “ Dad had a favorite spot?”

“Yeh at the oak tree, we used to sit out there all the time. None of you did that?” Luther asks.

“Oh yeah, after training” you chime in, causing the adults to look at you. You heard Diego scoff again and saw Luther quickly furrow his brow then smooth out his face again.

“Will there be refreshments?” Klaus asks walking out from behind the bar, “ Tea? Scones? Cucumber sandwiches are always a winner.” 

He goes to take a seat next to you when Luther speaks up

“What? No, and put that out. You know dad didn’t allow smoking in here.”

You roll your eyes. If you had to choose one thing to hate about Luther, you’d choose his insistent need to always be on your Father's good side. He can be such a downer sometimes.

“Is that my skirt?”

You hadn’t even noticed Klaus in the skirt. If you had to be honest, it did really suit him. You let out a small laugh, hearing Klaus mention his “bits”.

“Listen up.”

Oh boy, you’ve heard this tone before. You really forgot how stern Luther could be.

“There’s still some important things that we need to discuss alright ?”

“Um Luther” you squeak out, “ what more is there to talk about? Its not like Father had many friends we can invite. And his only family is us...”

“Yeah. The kids right, what else is there to discuss?” Diego asks.

You turn to him in surprise, this is basically the first time he acknowledged you unprompted. You send him a smile that, as expected, he ignores.

Oh well, small steps.

“ The way he died.”

“ And here we go”

You scrunch your eyebrows, “the way he died?”

Klaus sits next to you, throwing an arm around your shoulder as Vanya speaks up,

“I don’t understand, I thought they said it was a heart attack...”

“A heart attack?” You ask, realizing that no one’s really did tell you how your father died..

You’re question gained a suspicious look from Luther and confusion from the rest.

“ Y/n...you didn’t know?” Alison asked gently.

“ no one told me...” You say quietly, feeling nervous from the sudden attention.

“Well, According or to the coroner it was.” Luther continues.

“Well wouldn’t they know?”

“Theoretically..”

“Theoretically??”

You don’t understand. You don’t understand why nobody told you how your father died. You don’t understand why everyone was acting weird. And you don’t understand why Luther was bringing this up.

You feel a hand on your forearm, breaking you from your thoughts. You turn your head to see Klaus.

“ you lost in space?” He whispers playfully, “ I would be too, having to listen to Detective Daddy issues over here.”

You let out a small chuckle and whisper back, “ well technically we all have daddy issues.”

This earned you a quiet laugh and a pat on the arm. Then Klaus went to drink whatever was in his cup. And you tuned in again.

“ i’m just saying at the very least something happened. ” Luther says looking around the room, “ The last time I talk to dad he sounded strange.”

“Oh quelle surprise!” Klaus gurgles through his drink.

The rest of the adult ignored him, only sparing him a quick glance.

“Strange how?” Alison asked, continuing the conversation.

“ he sounded on edge”, Luther said, “ told me to be careful who to trust.”

He then gave you pointed look. You looked back at him perplexed, not knowing why he looked at you that way.

“Luther,” Diego chimed in, “ he was a paranoid, bitter old man who was starting to lose what was left of his marbles. ”

You frown at that statement. Sure your father was old and sort of eccentric, but his mind was sharp.

But come to think of it he was acting really weird the week before he died. He started telling you more about your siblings, about your place in the world and how you were meant to help it. He spent more time with you more than he ever has your whole life. He was, in his own way, nicer to you. Nicer in training, nicer on your free time, nicer in general. He took you out to the old oak tree more often, and just sat there with you, no lectures, no tirades, he just sat in silence.

It was almost like... like he knew he was going to die. 



“I can’t just call dad in the afterlife and be like, “ hey dad can you stop playing tennis with Hitler really quick and take a quick call?’” Klaus says exasperatedly.

Oh right you forgot, he can talk to ghosts.

“ since when? that’s your thing.” Luther asks

“ i’m not in the right... Frame of mind!!” 

“ You’re high?” Alison asks

“Yeah!” Klaus laughs, “ Who wouldn’t be listening to this nonsense. Right kiddo?”

He nudged you gently look at you for confirmation.

Your eyes widen and before you can even answer Diego cut you off,

“ Don’t bring her in this, she probably isn’t even know what being high is.”

You most certainly do. You’re not a child.

“ Look, just sober up this is important!” Luther demands , then continues on, “ and then there’s the missing monocle.”

“Who gives a shit about the missing monocle?” Diego mutters.

“ Father is missing his monocle?” You ask, getting ignored again.

“Exactly, it’s worthless.” Luther states, “ so whoever took it it must’ve been personal.”

The group starts to actually pay attention to him

“ Someone close to him, someone with a grudge.” He determines.

Wait...he’s not implying..

“Where are you going with this?” Klaus asks

“Oh, isn’t obvious Klaus?” Diego taunts, “ He thinks one of us killed dad.”

Luther grunts, but doesn’t deny his accusation.

The room goes silent as everyone tries to come to terms with what was revealed.

“ Luther...” you start sadly, feeling hurt and betrayed.

“You do?” Klaus asks in disbelief

“How could you think that?” Vanya chimes in

“ is it really that far-fetched?” Luther defends himself, “ I mean, it’s not secret how much you all hate him.”

“Luther.” Alison says sternly

“ That’s not fair accusation, there’s no evidence or anything...” you say defending your siblings, “ Besides, no one came home until today. Trust me, I’d know.”

But that just turned him on you 

“ And where were you when he died?”

Your breath hitched, “ what?”

“ You’re the one who can heal people right? So where were you? Why didn’t you heal him?” He demands, “ Or did you let him die?”

“ Luther!” Alison shouts at him

You stay silent as you can’t think of anything to say. You already felt horrible about not being able to save your father. But yo hear it from Luther...

“I..” you start to say but get choked up. You feel the walls close up around you and the heavy gaze of these adults. You quickly stand up and run out of the room sniffing.

It was then that Luther realized what he just accused you of.

“Y/n wait..” he starts but you’re already gone by the time he spoke up. He turns to the rest of his siblings, facing their glares and betrayed looks.

“ Great job Luther.” Diego says sarcastically, “ Way to lead.”

And with that he walks out the room.

“That’s..that’s not what I’m saying”

“You’re crazy man. You’re crazy.” Klaus said getting up from his spot and grabbing his things. “Crazy”

“I..I wasn’t finished”

“ Okay, sorry I’m just gonna go get Y/n and have her help me murder mom.” Klaus sneers, “ You know, after I get her to stop crying, be right back.”

“That’s not what I was saying!” Luther says, “ I didn’t—“ he cuts himself off, seeing as everyone but Alison left.

Then she gets up to leave, but says this

“ That little girl has had it rough enough growing up here, she doesn’t need anymore from you.”

Then she walks out ignoring what Luther tries to say.

Leaving him all alone.

“That went well.”



[the-names-kam]

no wait i’m not done talking about this

THOMAS NEVER HAS A MOMENT OF TRUE EMOTIONAL VULNERABILITY AND SELF ACTUALIZATION.

the closest we get, i believe, is in Gone Gone. he is clearly mourning the loss of mary, but instead of focusing on her and his actual feelings about her, he instead turns the focus back on himself, and talks about how much he has left to give, and his circumstances when he first met mary, and, of course, how much he loves alison.

and obviously part of that is just who thomas is as a person. that’s just one of his flaws. but.

i can’t help but feel like he’s deflecting, talking about things that we already know are upsetting to him (being unable to create his art, the circumstances of his death) instead of how mary’s death is actually affecting him.

he does have his moments, obviously. telling alison he wants her to be happy when he’s in the bath (i do believe that that was genuine lmao), him realizing he’s making everything about himself once alison points it out, the memorial to mary he helps alison come up with.

but. they’re very brief, and, imo, they don’t give as much insight into his character as the others’ reactions do.

even in his backstory episode (and in a few others as well, like the camping episode), he has his moments of brief vulnerability, but it’s nothing groundbreaking for his character like the others.

and it FEELS like he’s being vulnerable all the time, constantly talking about how he feels at any given moment, but. he’s not… saying anything.

like it’s all just… surface level. “oh, the tv show they’re shooting is about byron, his nemesis, that makes him angry! oh, and alison has a crush on the actor, that makes him sad!” y’know what i mean?

but like. i don’t even know if this is intentional or not because i can’t help but feel like the show doesn’t really. try with thomas.

like they’re just kind of like, “oh, yeah, thomas is obnoxious and overbearing and not good with boundaries, that’s just how he is” rather than giving him the depth the other characters have. (absolutely no hate towards the actors/writers tho !!)

idk i’m just kind of. fascinated by this now.

something that i find interesting about thomas is that i feel like he never really complains about things that actually negatively affect(ed) him

like he laments about how his mother took a little too long to come feed him that one time, but never mentions being addicted to opium (and presumably going through withdrawal), which is obviously an incredibly awful thing to go through

and aside from his “OH GOD, IT BURNS” line when presented with the musket ball, he also never talks about getting shot, even though getting shot in the gut is an extremely painful way to die

idk maybe i’m reading too much into him but it’s just. interesting