#when I get a little better at it I'll have to make an eli and do a comparison
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syntheticsystem · 15 days ago
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throwback to my first attempt at needle felting. he is heating up by the lamp like a lizard (an ysalamir?) and missing eli. he has also been skipping leg day but we don't talk about that. I stabbed him innumerable times to make him, but he said it was artistically done so I get a pass.
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wileys-russo · 11 days ago
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fresa + alexia, at home
“do you promise you’ll come back?”
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lil before the void blurb, part of the fresa universe
big promises II a.putellas
"but why!" alexia sighed as the question she'd heard easily a hundred times today was once again flung at her. "because, i have to go." she answered vaguely, no answer no matter how short or long or blunt or detailed it was seeming to be enough for you.
"fresa-" alexia turned with an armful of clothes to find those she'd just packed away neatly in her case were now out and in a crumpled heap on her bed, her four year old sister glaring up at her beside them.
"you can do that as many times as you want pequeña, i still have to go." alexia dropped the clothes in her arms alongside the others, once again restarting her folding and packing for the fourth or fifth time.
"but why!" and there it was again.
"fresa? hija, deja que tu hermana haga la maleta." eli popped her inside with a nod of her head for you to leave alexia be to her packing as you crossed your arms stubbornly and shook your own head.
though before the woman could come to collect and remove you herself alexia chimed in. "está bien, mamá." her eldest assured with a nod, the two seeming to have a silent conversation for a moment before eli retreated.
"ven aquí fresita." alexia sat down on the edge of her bed and patted the space beside her as you shuffled forward to join her, legs dangling in the air as you absentmindedly kicked them to and fro.
"i have to go to camp hermana, you want me to be better at football, no?" your sister questioned with a raised eyebrow as you looked up at her and firmly shook your head. "you are already the best ale." you frowned, the older girls face softening as she ran a hand through your hair with a smile.
"no hermana, i am not. but i would like to be! one day. to get there i have to play with some other players who are muy bueno, because that will make me get better." alexia explained gently as you sighed, a noise much more troubled than someone your age should need to be.
"do you remember when we played hide and seek nena, and you would get upset because alba always found you first?" alexia tried a different tactic as you nodded, as always hanging off her every word.
"what did you do?" alexia asked as you paused. "i cried. but she cheated ale! she peeked through her fingers and-" you began to protest as alexia let out a laugh and shook her head. "no no hermanita, not that." she smiled as you frowned.
"the more we played, you found better hiding spots, and it took longer to find you. sí?" your sister questioned as you nodded, albeit a little more enthusiastically now.
"well. the more football i play nena, i learn more, get better." alexia finished as you nodded a little slower, seeming to finally understand more now just why alexia had to leave for the next week.
"but i'll miss you ale. i don't want you to go!" you pressed yourself into her, clinging onto the fabric of her shirt as the brunette smiled sadly. "i know fresa, i will miss you too." she pulled you up to stand on her knees and into a proper hug, gently rubbing your back as you clung on tightly.
"espera!" you started to pull away as your sister lowered you to the ground and watched on curiously as you took off, footsteps thumping down the hall as alexia stood, resuming her packing.
she glanced up as you came skidding back into the room, red tucked under one arm and a book tucked under the other, climbing back up and onto her bed, shaking your head as she tried to help, determined to do it yourself.
you carefully placed down your bear and the book alexia recognised as your favourite, knowing alba could practically quote it word for word you'd made her read it to you so much it was barely held together, pages dog eared and turned hundreds of times each.
"allí." you nodded content as alexia frowned. "pequeña. we already went over this you cannot come with me-" alexia tried to take your prized possessions out of her case as you pushed her hands away.
"i know! you take them hermana." your sister gave you a look of bewilderment at the announcement. "but nena, red is yours, and your favourite book? what will you read?" alexia questioned with a frown.
"i want you to take them, so you can think of me and when you are sad you can read my book and talk to red. like i do! she is a good listener." you smiled up at her and alexia melted, the tiny little gap in your teeth where you'd lost your first tooth, her chest tightening as she selfishly hoped you'd not lose anymore while she was gone, or have any new firsts for that matter.
"gracias fresa." was all your sister could manage out, overwhelmed at the small but thoughtful gesture. "i still have alba while you are not here." you spoke, more so as if to assure yourself more than alexia who chuckled.
"i thought you hated alba?" your sister teased, your other sister and yourself having quite the complex love/hate relationship, though at the end of the day it would always be that while alba might pick on and tease you, the very moment anyone else tried she was your biggest and baddest defender.
"i like fighting with her. its fun!" you shrugged, eli calling out for everyone to wash up before dinner as you jumped down from alexias bed and she winced but as always, you were fine.
"but don't tell her that!" you warned poking her leg accusingly as alexia laughed, pushing your head to the side as you stumbled and swung a fist at her, your sister easily dodging as her foot kicked up to hit you from behind, again the older girl easily side stepping your attempts to kick her back.
"ale." you paused in her doorway, fidgeting with your fingers as your sister turned, raising an eyebrow as alba flew past you both in a blur, determined to get first pick of whatever was on offer for dinner but you paid it no mind.
"do you promise you will come back?" your voice was small as you stopped to look up at alexia and your sisters heart broke at the troubled look on your face, knowing exactly why you were so unsure that she would.
you both knew all too well the pain of losing someone you thought would always be there, alexia kneeling down so she was eye to eye with you, hands coming to grab either side of your face with a steely look on her face.
"i promise fresita. i promise i will always come back."
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mostlysignssomeportents · 5 months ago
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There’s no such thing as “shareholder supremacy”
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On SEPTEMBER 24th, I'll be speaking IN PERSON at the BOSTON PUBLIC LIBRARY!
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Here's a cheap trick: claim that your opponents' goals are so squishy and qualitative that no one will ever be able to say whether they've been succeeded or failed, and then declare that your goals can be evaluated using crisp, objective criteria.
This is the whole project of "economism," the idea that politics, with its emphasis on "fairness" and other intangibles, should be replaced with a mathematical form of economics, where every policy question can be reduced to an equation…and then "solved":
https://pluralistic.net/2023/03/28/imagine-a-horse/#perfectly-spherical-cows-of-uniform-density-on-a-frictionless-plane
Before the rise of economism, it was common to speak of its subjects as "political economy" or even "moral philosophy" (Adam Smith, the godfather of capitalism, considered himself a "moral philosopher"). "Political economy" implicitly recognizes that every policy has squishy, subjective, qualitative dimensions that don't readily boil down to math.
For example, if you're asking about whether people should have the "freedom" to enter into contracts, it might be useful to ask yourself how desperate your "free" subject might be, and whether the entity on the other side of that contract is very powerful. Otherwise you'll get "free contracts" like "I'll sell you my kidneys if you promise to evacuate my kid from the path of this wildfire."
The problem is that power is hard to represent faithfully in quantitative models. This may seem like a good reason to you to be skeptical of modeling, but for economism, it's a reason to pretend that the qualitative doesn't exist. The method is to incinerate those qualitative factors to produce a dubious quantitative residue and do math on that:
https://locusmag.com/2021/05/cory-doctorow-qualia/
Hence the famous Ely Devons quote: "If economists wished to study the horse, they wouldn’t go and look at horses. They’d sit in their studies and say to themselves, ‘What would I do if I were a horse?’"
https://pluralistic.net/2022/10/27/economism/#what-would-i-do-if-i-were-a-horse
The neoliberal revolution was a triumph for economism. Neoliberal theorists like Milton Friedman replaced "political economy" with "law and economics," the idea that we should turn every one of our complicated, nuanced, contingent qualitative goals into a crispy defined "objective" criteria. Friedman and his merry band of Chicago School economists replaced traditional antitrust (which sought to curtail the corrupting power of large corporations) with a theory called "consumer welfare" that used mathematics to decide which monopolies were "efficient" and therefore good (spoiler: monopolists who paid Friedman's pals to do this mathematical analysis always turned out to be running "efficient" monopolies):
https://pluralistic.net/2022/02/20/we-should-not-endure-a-king/
One of Friedman's signal achievements was the theory of "shareholder supremacy." In 1970, the New York Times published Friedman's editorial "The Social Responsibility of Business Is to Increase Its Profits":
https://www.nytimes.com/1970/09/13/archives/a-friedman-doctrine-the-social-responsibility-of-business-is-to.html
In it, Friedman argued that corporate managers had exactly one job: to increase profits for shareholders. All other considerations – improving the community, making workers' lives better, donating to worthy causes or sponsoring a little league team – were out of bounds. Managers who wanted to improve the world should fund their causes out of their paychecks, not the corporate treasury.
Friedman cloaked his hymn to sociopathic greed in the mantle of objectivism. For capitalism to work, corporations have to solve the "principal-agent" problem, the notoriously thorny dilemma created when one person (the principal) asks another person (the agent) to act on their behalf, given the fact that the agent might find a way to line their own pockets at the principal's expense (for example, a restaurant server might get a bigger tip by offering to discount diners' meals).
Any company that is owned by stockholders and managed by a CEO and other top brass has a huge principal-agent problem, and yet, the limited liability, joint-stock company had produced untold riches, and was considered the ideal organization for "capital formation" by Friedman et al. In true economismist form, Friedman treated all the qualitative questions about the duty of a company as noise and edited them out of the equation, leaving behind a single, elegant formulation: "a manager is doing their job if they are trying to make as much money as possible for their shareholders."
Friedman's formulation was a hit. The business community ran wild with it. Investors mistook an editorial in the New York Times for an SEC rulemaking and sued corporate managers on the theory that they had a "fiduciary duty" to "maximize shareholder value" – and what's more, the courts bought it. Slowly and piecemeal at first, but bit by bit, the idea that rapacious greed was a legal obligation turned into an edifice of legal precedent. Business schools taught it, movies were made about it, and even critics absorbed the message, insisting that we needed to "repeal the law" that said that corporations had to elevate profit over all other consideration (not realizing that no such law existed).
It's easy to see why shareholder supremacy was so attractive for investors and their C-suite Renfields: it created a kind of moral crumple-zone. Whenever people got angry at you for being a greedy asshole, you could shrug and say, "My hands are tied: the law requires me to run the business this way – if you don't believe me, just ask my critics, who insist that we must get rid of this law!"
In a long feature for The American Prospect, Adam M Lowenstein tells the story of how shareholder supremacy eventually came into such wide disrepute that the business lobby felt that it had to do something about it:
https://prospect.org/power/2024-09-17-ponzi-scheme-of-promises/
It starts in 2018, when Jamie Dimon and Warren Buffett decried the short-term, quarterly thinking in corporate management as bad for business's long-term health. When Washington Post columnist Steve Pearlstein wrote a column agreeing with them and arguing that even moreso, businesses should think about equities other than shareholder returns, Jamie Dimon lost his shit and called Pearlstein to call it "the stupidest fucking column I’ve ever read":
https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/wonk/wp/2018/06/07/will-ending-quarterly-earnings-guidance-free-ceos-to-think-long-term/
But the dam had broken. In the months and years that followed, the Business Roundtable would adopt a series of statements that repudiated shareholder supremacy, though of course they didn't admit it. Rather, they insisted that they were clarifying that they'd always thought that sometimes not being a greedy asshole could be good for business, too. Though these statements were nonbinding, and though the CEOs who signed them did so in their personal capacity and not on behalf of their companies, capitalism's most rabid stans treated this as an existential crisis.
Lowenstein identifies this as the forerunner to today's panic over "woke corporations" and "DEI," and – just as with "woke capitalism" – the whole thing amounted to a a PR exercise. Lowenstein links to several studies that found that the CEOs who signed onto statements endorsing "stakeholder capitalism" were "more likely to lay off employees during COVID-19, were less inclined to contribute to pandemic relief efforts, had 'higher rates of environmental and labor-related compliance violations,”' emitted more carbon into the atmosphere, and spent more money on dividends and buybacks."
One researcher concluded that "signing this statement had zero positive effect":
https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2020/08/companies-stand-solidarity-are-licensing-themselves-discriminate/614947
So shareholder supremacy isn't a legal obligation, and statements repudiating shareholder supremacy don't make companies act any better.
But there's an even more fundamental flaw in the argument for the shareholder supremacy rule: it's impossible to know if the rule has been broken.
The shareholder supremacy rule is an unfalsifiable proposition. A CEO can cut wages and lay off workers and claim that it's good for profits because the retained earnings can be paid as a dividend. A CEO can raise wages and hire more people and claim it's good for profits because it will stop important employees from defecting and attract the talent needed to win market share and spin up new products.
A CEO can spend less on marketing and claim it's a cost-savings. A CEO can spend more on marketing and claim it's an investment. A CEO can eliminate products and call it a savings. A CEO can add products and claim they're expansions into new segments. A CEO can settle a lawsuit and claim they're saving money on court fees. A CEO can fight a lawsuit through to the final appeal and claim that they're doing it to scare vexatious litigants away by demonstrating their mettle.
CEOs can use cheaper, inferior materials and claim it's a savings. They can use premium materials and claim it's a competitive advantage that will produce new profits. Everything a company does can be colorably claimed as an attempt to save or make money, from sponsoring the local little league softball team to treating effluent to handing ownership of corporate landholdings to perpetual trusts that designate them as wildlife sanctuaries.
Bribes, campaign contributions, onshoring, offshoring, criminal conspiracies and conference sponsorships – there's a business case for all of these being in line with shareholder supremacy.
Take Boeing: when the company smashed its unions and relocated key production to scab plants in red states, when it forced out whistleblowers and senior engineers who cared about quality, when it outsourced design and production to shops around the world, it realized a savings. Today, between strikes, fines, lawsuits, and a mountain of self-inflicted reputational harm, the company is on the brink of ruin. Was Boeing good to its shareholders? Well, sure – the shareholders who cashed out before all the shit hit the fan made out well. Shareholders with a buy-and-hold posture (like the index funds that can't sell their Boeing holdings so long as the company is in the S&P500) got screwed.
Right wing economists criticize the left for caring too much about "how big a slice of the pie they're getting" rather than focusing on "growing the pie." But that's exactly what Boeing management did – while claiming to be slaves to Friedman's shareholder supremacy. They focused on getting a bigger slice of the pie, screwing their workers, suppliers and customers in the process, and, in so doing, they made the pie so much smaller that it's in danger of disappearing altogether.
Here's the principal-agent problem in action: Boeing management earned bonuses by engaging in corporate autophagia, devouring the company from within. Now, long-term shareholders are paying the price. Far from solving the principal-agent problem with a clean, bright-line rule about how managers should behave, shareholder supremacy is a charter for doing whatever the fuck a CEO feels like doing. It's the squishiest rule imaginable: if someone calls you cruel, you can blame the rule and say you had no choice. If someone calls you feckless, you can blame the rule and say you had no choice. It's an excuse for every season.
The idea that you can reduce complex political questions – like whether workers should get a raise or whether shareholders should get a dividend – to a mathematical rule is a cheap sleight of hand. The trick is an obvious one: the stuff I want to do is empirically justified, while the things you want are based in impossible-to-pin-down appeals to emotion and its handmaiden, ethics. Facts don't care about your feelings, man.
But it's feelings all the way down. Milton Friedman's idol-worshiping cult of shareholder supremacy was never about empiricism and objectivity. It's merely a gimmick to make greed seem scientifically optimal.
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The paperback edition of The Lost Cause, my nationally bestselling, hopeful solarpunk novel is out this month!
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If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:
https://pluralistic.net/2024/09/18/falsifiability/#figleaves-not-rubrics/a>
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okaysonny · 29 days ago
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how would the crew heads confess to you? (lookism)
A/N: a follow up post to: how easy is it for the crew heads to crush on you? (lookism)
thanks for all the love on it :) takes place during the current story!
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✦ you're blissfully ignorant + their feelings are not reciprocated... (until you're aware of them anyway lol) because i like the #disbelief 👅
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1. ELI
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eli decides to take a leap of faith. he's not sure what to expect, but he's witnessed warren and sally's situation. he doesn't want his own love life to be a repeat 🫠
now that he's more sure of himself, more sure that he's allowed to feel someone's affections, he wants to know if his aimless pining for you really is aimless.
i think he'd confess to you in hostel's living room 🫡 (where warren + sally kissed) a simple but special place for him. it's where eli spends time with his family, and he wants you to be a part of that too.
he gets a pep talk from warren and sally first ofc! since they ended up together after all that tension, they remind him of their own experiences. warren would defo say something like: take it from me, gangdong's mighty...and romantic.
the gist of their speech is that: it'll be awkward, but better than waiting three years to properly confess. just be honest - if you don't try, you'll never know.
─ and if you get rejected? i'll be here with popcorn.
─ hush warren! don't listen to him eli. you've got this! (sally flashes a thumbs up 👍🏽)
he also gets motivation from amy and natalie <3 (you can do it uncle!)
eli can only smile bashfully. in the end, they're genuinely here supporting him, no matter what happens.
when the time actually comes, they all leave to give him privacy •ᴗ• (but they'd be listening through the door the whole time 😭)
his confession...is very cute and sweet 🥲 he doesn't have jake's guilt or johan's awkwardness, so he actually looks happy to be admitting his feelings, listing off all the things he admires about you.
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eli's daughter is the most important thing in the world - she's changed him for the better. so, seeing yenna so happy with you has made his heart flutter. (didn't mean for that to rhyme lmfaooo)
his feelings for you go beyond romantic attraction. it's also how well you've fit into his life, how it feels like you're meant to be there. bringing someone into his family's world is a big deal for him - but it would make him so happy to have you in it.
not that he doesn't love being a dad - he clearly does! but eli's life has been centered around taking care of yenna, handling hostel's issues, working hard to make ends meet...he's never really thought about who he is outside of that.
with you, eli feels like he can explore life more freely. he feels appreciated - maybe even a little carefree in a way that’s new for him. with you, even though the pressures and responsibilities are still there, he feels lighter. he remembers he has dreams and aspirations like anyone else. for the first time in ages, he feels like he can be just eli.
he hasn't properly liked anyone since heather - and even that's slightly different. this time, he actually knows what he's feeling. and if there's even a slight chance you'd want to be with him, he would do everything he can to make you happy - just as much as you make him.
eli acknowledges that it's a lot to ask, having a child in the picture. still, should that always prevent him from pursuing a relationship? if he gets that privilege, he would only want you. you would give him (and yenna) so much joy.
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eli's words are filled with quiet hope, his cheeks pink as his confessions spill out.
even if you don’t feel the same way, having you in his life, even as a friend, means the world to him. he doesn't want to lose that.
if eli can't be with you, he can live with it, but he doesn't want to wonder if he missed the chance to tell you.
2. JAKE
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this man is filled with such angst and anguish 😂🤦🏽‍♀️
BTW - i think by this point, you'll know his job + past actions. you were unnerved when he admitted it...but jake has faced the repercussions (partly). he still has interests and hobbies like everyone else, he's still good company. you can't bring yourself to fully judge him, because you've never been in that position.
jake wasn't going to say anything. it's less messy, less selfish, if he keeps his feelings to himself.
that doesn't stop you from occupying his head though. he can't help but wonder what you're doing. are you safe? are you happy? if not, could he make you happy? ...possibly?
still, he pushes these thoughts away.
it's only when members of big deal notice his spacing out and lapses in concentration that he thinks: okay...i should probably do something.
he'd rather hear your rejection than keep wondering if there's a chance...+ to not have you (unknowingly) interfere with his duties.
first things first though, he needs some advice.
he'd totallyyy go to sinu. i can picture it so clearly 😂 jake is a smooth talker, but he's never actually liked someone. he can't talk his way though this. (he can try, but he'd fail miserably)
sinu would be so chuffed that his (practically) little brother is coming to him for relationship advice. (i never thought i'd see the day...you're all grown up. and he wipes a tear 😭) given jake's lack of interest in dating, he's pleasantly surprised at his change of heart! you must have had a big impact on him.
jake asks if sinu felt guilty liking yeonhui, considering his role in big deal. he was perceived as a gang leader back then...did sinu ever feel like she deserves better than that?
sinu gets nostalgic and starts reminiscing about his relationship 😅 jake zones out halfway through, wondering why he even bothered to ask in the first place.
EVENTUALLY THOUGH, he reels it back in and gets #serious 🙂‍↕️ something like: how long will you let your role and past define you?
the gist of sinu's speech: sure, jake has done bad things. (...worst than most people) but he shouldn't let that hold him back. jake can still try be something better, he's not some heartless monster. there's no harm in being honest, he'll never know what could happen.
jake is gobsmacked... a man of passion indeed.
i think he'd confess to you at the sea side! (where samuel found out who jake's dad was) he'd rather watch the waves than your confused face.
he tells big deal to stay away from that area, because he has important business there. (jake knows they'd be spying from a distance if he didn't 😭)
i think he'd practice in the mirror beforehand...but it does nothing to settle his nerves (-.-)
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jake likes you. he knows it's unexpected and out of the blue, but he has to tell you.
you don't realise how amazing you are, how smart, how caring. it's the little things...helping jerry with his homework (god knows no one else can) or paying for your meals even though it's not necessary - he'll always let you eat for free. + plus the food is lowkey shit anyway <3
...or how well you get along with the girls. (they constantly tell him to ask you out 😪)
he knows he's not worthy. there's people who can easily give you their undivided attention. you deserve only the best...and he's the furthest thing from that. but he wishes he could be.
he doesn't want you to think he's the same person as before. you deserve someone way better than an ex-convict. jake wishes he could change the past - so badly. he regrets not trying harder for a better solution back then, just for the opportunity to take you on a date...to be with you.
jake wants to be the best version of himself. you make him think that being a better person could change some of his past...and eventually make him worthy of someone like you.
and if there's even a sliver of hope you feel the same way, that you'd give him the honour of being his first...everything, he'll do everything in his power to be a boyfriend you can be proud of.
he doesn't need you to say anything, jake would never pressure you for a yes or no. he just needed to say the truth, to be honest with you - and himself.
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jake kim, who's always so sarcastic and sure of himself, is suddenly so nervous and quiet before you. it's a side you've never seen of him.
there's a lot to consider. sometimes you'd never see jake, he'll be in danger a lot, and if he really had to - he'd be ruthless again to protect big deal. he knows that too.
even so, he's pouring his heart out, trying so hard for you...and you don't even think you're that great, to be honest.
you find your cheeks flushing at his words, and the earnest way in which he utters them.
3. JOHAN
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johan...i found him hard to write. i don't like this little mouse.
if you like someone, you should probably tell them. johan would rather die. but eventually, not saying anything has gotten more painful than the prospect of confessing.
he hasn't liked anyone since mira and that feels like...a lifetime ago. so, he (very reluctantly) goes to zack for help.
zack would be sooo annoying about it, he'll never let him live it down. johan seong coming to him for dating advice...another indicator that their worlds are healing ❤️ he shuts up though when johan threatens to beat his ass.
i think zack would give the same bs advice he gave to vasco in the blind date arc 😭😭
─ alright...you really wanna know? let me give you a piece of advice i told a certain knuckle head. Be gentle...but fast. Be manly...but kind.
─ wait...have you got together with mira yet?
─ all in good time johan...all in good time. (zack taps his noggin 🧏🏻)
so that was useless.
there is another person he can go to though...mother knows best, as they say 🫡 johan would invite you to have dinner at his place, just a causal meal...obviously 😁
─ so you're johan's friend! it's great to finally meet you. help yourself! (he got his cutie patootie genes from his mom)
johan's mom gives him playful nudges when your back is turned 💘 he silently pleads with her to cut it out.
now that he has his mother's seal of approval, he feels ready to...confess or whatever.
i think johan would confess to you while sitting at the river with eden + miro. (the one where lua pushed him in 💔)
unlike eli and jake, johan's confession isn't planned. he decides to tell you when it feels right. and this place feels right.
he'd be avoiding eye contact the WHOLEEE time 😭 his face would be so red too...a cutie patootie to the max.
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johan starts by talking about the little things, like how his dogs are always happy when they see you. eden and miro get so jumpy and excited when you come over, as if they can sense how much he cares about you. it's something he can speak about easily - they're a big part of his life.
and his mom - johan's mom is so important to him. her approval means a lot…and she definitely approves (of you). she really likes you, especially after that dinner at his house. his mom is his rock in so many ways, the fact that she sees what he sees, means the world to him.
johan hid behind a stoic facade for so long. he's grateful to zack and mira for showing him that having feelings for someone…it can be a beautiful thing. with you, he feels more okay stepping out of that shell. maybe it's the way you always listen when he talks…or how you're there for him without making a big deal out of it…or how you celebrate the small things with him. (aka…barely passing english)
the professions are still foreign to him. it’s not just about liking you, it’s about the vulnerability that comes with it. he’s afraid of how this might change things between you two. but, johan knows hiding it would only make things worse. he can’t keep pretending like nothing’s there. it’s been weighing on him for so long.
still, he’s ready to face that fear of vulnerability, to show you all the sides to him. he’s letting you in — not just with his feelings for you, but with his whole self, all the things he’s kept locked away. for johan, that’s a huge deal.
‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ♡ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ
the man who united all of gangbuk, who went toe to toe with gun park...is suddenly so shy and awkward right now. truly a rare sight.
he's mumbling almost every sentence and you have to scoot closer to hear him, which definitely doesn't help things.
johan is thankful for eden and miro's barking for once, it fills the silence that passes.
it's not the smoothest confession, but that’s exactly what makes it sweet - he's showing you a bit of his heart by saying nothing and everything at the same time.
4. SAMUEL
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he'd confess you're his fav BOOTY CALL maybe!
an actual confession of his: when samuel sees cheap instant noodle packs in the store, he can't help but think of big deal.
If it means I can eat better food later...I don't mind eating here now.
but he's annoyed the lavish food he can buy now doesn't quite fill him up the same way.
✿ who would have you blushing the most?
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A/N: first date headcanons next?? 🤷🏽‍♀️ if ppl like this one too
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eternalsams · 3 months ago
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Scare Me If You Can ⇴ J.Seresin
pairing: Jake Seresin x fem!reader
warning/content: 15+, swearing, sexual tension?, fake blood, fake weapon, scare actress!reader,Jake is a kinky bastard, boner alert
summary: Jake wanted to scare his younger brother by going to the Horror Village, but he ended up being the one scared.
word count: 2.2k
a/n: English isn't my first language so please take that into consideration. I'm so sorry, this isn't as good as last year's, to be honest I don't think I'll ever make as good as last year.
tgm masterlist main masterlist
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Jake has always loved Halloween. Since the early age of 5, when his dad told him he could dress up as a pilot, Jake was convinced Halloween was the best holiday ever. He then switched to dressing up as a sexy firefighter when he got into college. He actually slept with multiple girls thanks to that one shirtless firefighter costume. But when he got into the Naval Academy, he didn't have time or the energy to look for a new costume, so he forgot about Halloween for a few years. That until this year, when he managed to get some leave for the holiday, and now he was back in Texas with his family to celebrate the day before the return of the dead.
He only had the time to settle in his old room when his mom told him she was leaving to pick up his younger brother at the train station. Jake smiled and nodded, watching the woman who raised him leave the house. It had been a while since Jake didn't see his brother; with college and deployments, common free times were hard to find. But knowing Elijah would be there for Halloween made it so much better. So he waited patiently until his mom and brother came back, hid behind the door, and listened to them walk up the porch steps, talking about whatever. The door opened on him, and he waited for his mother to walk in before jumping on Elijah, shouting his name to scare him. The younger man cursed as Jake laughed before insulting his older brother. Jake wrapped his arm around his brother's shoulders, still chuckling. "Good to see you, Eli'."
"Come on, boys. Don't start." Their mom lectured them as she made her way to the living room. Elijah pushed his brother back and shoved him away, starting unintentionally a playfight with Jake, who locked his brother's head under his arm. "Boys, please. At least, do that outside." Mother Seresin sighed, her face peaking out from the living room. "Listen to your mother." Their dad's voice rang, and both boys stopped their heckling. "Well, I still need to welcome our young prodigy home!" Jake shoved his brother's shoulder. "If one of us is a prodigy, it's you, Jake." His mom chuckled lightly and Elijah's lips parted in shock. "Ouch, that hurts." He grumbled in fake hurt. "Well, Jake's the one with the nice house next to California beaches." Jake laughed and wrapped his arm around his younger brother's shoulders. "But we're very proud of you for getting into college, Elijah." Both Seresin parents laughed at the boys' banter, and the younger Seresin pouted. "Fuck off."
"Hey, watch your language in my house!" Their mom intervened before she walked up to them with a flyer. "Why don't you go see the attraction they set in town?" Jake grabbed the flyer from his mom's hands, and a smile stretched his lips when he read the words Horror Village. "Well, that seems fun!" Elijah snatched the piece of paper from his brother and nodded. "Alright, I'll go. Could be fun."
"Oh, you won't get rid of me that easily. I'm coming with ya!" Jake went to grab his jacket and Elijah's from the coat rack. "Only if I'm driving." The younger Seresin said as he caught his coat throw at him by his brother. "Not even in your dreams, buddy." Jake chuckled, grabbing his car keys and opening the door, letting his little brother walk out. He waved at his parents and joined Elijah in the car.
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Jake had his hands sunk into his pockets, looking around like a little kid. The dim lights created the perfect Halloween atmosphere. He and Elijah reached the Horror Village's gates and multiple security guards were standing there, checking IDs and bags. "You sure you're old enough to be allowed there?" Jake asked his brother with a smirk, earning him a jab in the ribs. Both Seresin brothers passed the gates and a man came up to them to mark their hands and enunciate the guidelines. "No alcohol allowed. There will be actors in there, they can touch you, you can touch them. All the weapons you'll see or come in contact with are fake. If one of the actors goes too far, say 'blackbird' and they'll leave you be. Enjoy your night, gentlemen." The man explained and Jake nodded to the oddly specific rules.
The two brothers started wandering into the village, laughing when a scare actor would jump on a visitor and earning them screams. They eventually reached a food truck and Jake ordered a candy apple, curious when he noticed they made them black. "Aren't you too old for this?" Elijah asked when Jake thanked the lady in the truck as she handed him his candy apple. "I'll never be too old for sugar." He winked at his little brother and moaned in delight as he took his first bite into the sugar-coated fruit. "You're a child." Elijah scoffed as he noticed a cute girl a little further. Jake followed his gaze and chuckled when he saw the girl leaving with her friends. He also noticed the short skirt she was wearing and the way his brother's eyes lowered to her bare legs. "Trust me, buddy. You don't have time for this." He clapped his hand on Elijah's shoulder.
"Don't have time for what? Fun?" Elijah raised a brow with a smile. "For girls like her, trust me when I say she'd only play with you." Jake tried to regain his brother's attention. "Maybe I wanna play with her too." He grinned, a well-known spark in his eyes. Jake grimaced and groaned, seeing too much of himself in his little brother. "Gross..." He grumbled as he finished his candy apple, throwing the wooden stick in the garbage near them. "Come on, Romeo. We've still gotta visit that village." He gently pushed his brother forward and kept walking, passing by new actors who were running or staring at visitors.
"Isn't that one of those ladies from your game?" Jake asked, pointing at a lady a bit further. He recognized the revealing outfit from one of the horror games his brother often plays. Elijah sighed, convinced his brother got it wrong but when his eyes landed on you, he raised his eyebrows. "Well shit, you're right. It's one of the nurses from Silent Hill!" And just like you heard them, you turned to them, tilted your head to the side as your character would do. Only a blind person couldn't tell the blond guy was attractive, but unfortunately for you, you were working so no flirting. But you could still have a bit of fun with visitors. You put your hand on a woman's shoulder to hold yourself, startling her and wobbled to the cute guy. The younger man next to him couldn't help himself and looked you up and down but your eyes were only on the taller one. Your entire face was covered with dirty bandages and fake blood, hiding your face and adding realism to the costume.
When you finally reach the man, you faked tripping and held yourself on him, sneaking out a fake scalpel. His arms immediately supported you and as he was about to ask if you were okay, you brought the prop to his neck and a sound escaped your mouth. It was between a low whimper and a complaint. "I think she got you, Jake!" The younger man laughed as the cute guy watched you with wide eyes. "Alright, alright. You're good, I have to admit it." He swallowed and the tip of your prop grazed his Adam's apple as he did so. You smiled under your makeup and slowly pulled back from him.
You raised your hand to his face and ran your dirty finger down his face, leaving a trail of fake blood on his skin. You straightened your legs, appearing taller in your high heeled shoes and brought your face to his, another whine leaving your lips.
Jake looked away from you, feeling your body heat emanating from you and warming up his own body. He hated the way you made him feel. He swore under his breath and tried to remember the safe word the guy at the gates gave them. Blackbird. But it wasn't necessary because you pulled back, taking your hand off his face and your body off his. Jake felt like he could breathe all over again. He refused to look down at you, scared he might ogle right down your revealing cleavage. You waved off the two men and staggered away, blowing Jake a kiss before disappearing into the night. Jake exhaled loudly and calmed himself down while Elijah laughed out loud. "You should see your face!" The young Seresin clapped his hand on his brother's shoulder. "Shut the fuck up."
Elijah looked at his brother up and down and chuckled some more. "Forget I said that. You should see your pants!" He laughed as he discreetly pointed at his brother's pants. Jake looked down and noticed the slight bulge of his jeans and the straining his own body had against the clothes. "God damn it..." The pilot swore and readjusted himself discreetly, looking around to check nobody saw that. "The nurse? Seriously?" Elijah questioned, still laughing at his brother. Jake glared at him and looked over his shoulders to see where you went, but he couldn't see you anymore. "She was hot, okay? Now leave me alone." Jake cleared his throat and tried to think of something else than your body pressed against his and kept walking through the village.
Not even twenty minutes later, his eyes caught sight of you again. His breath got stuck in his throat and he stopped in his track. Elijah slowed down to check on his brother until he noticed you. A smirk pulled at his lips and he turned to Jake. "Why don't you go ask for her number if you like her this much?" Jake rolled his eyes at the suggestion. "She's working and in character, she'd never give me her number. Aren't you supposed to know the nurses don't talk in Silent Hill?" The pilot turned to his brother. "Maybe you could give her a reason to talk." Elijah shrugged and looked at something over the blonde's shoulder. Jake felt a slight tap on his left shoulder and when he turned, his right shoulder was then tapped. He turned around and fell face to face with a bandaged face he recognized immediately.
"You again!" He chuckled and felt his face warm up. He could practically hear his brother's smirk behind him. You stood there, staring at him, your bare legs looking like they could break with how fragile they looked. But again, it was all an act to stay in character. He watched you leaned closer, his breath becoming heavier as you got closer to his body. "Your costume is really great. Very accurate." He said, trying to fill the silence. You tilted your head to the side, notifying you heard what he just said. But loyal to your act, you said nothing, your mouth shut behind the bandages around your head. You watched him as he extended his hand to you with a nervous smile. "I'm...I'm Jake." He nervously chuckled, a soft blush creeping up his face. A low whimper escaped your lips and Jake's smile fell, realizing he couldn't have a real conversation with you. "Right..." He sighed, his hand falling back down along his body. Elijah tapped his shoulder and encouraged him to keep walking. "Come on, we need to finish the tour."
Jake nodded in defeat and took a last look at you before following his brother. You watched him leave, disappointed you couldn't talk to him or anything without risking losing your job. Your character wasn't supposed to talk so you couldn't mutter a single word to anyone in the Village. You only hoped he'd understand and not take it personally.
The next morning, Jake was waiting in line for his coffee, looking down at his phone and the stupid jokes Rooster was sending on the group chat. His fellow pilot travelled back to Virginia to spend Halloween with his wife and kid and now the whole squad had to witness the atrocity he called a home-made costume of him and his kid. Dressed as a chicken and baby chick. Jake quickly typed an answer as he took a step forward, feeling the line move. But he didn't stop in time and bumped into someone. He quickly looked up and made eye contact with a young woman before apologizing. "Very sorry." He apologetically smiled and the woman looked at him up and down. Jake knew he was handsome, he knew too well, but his mind was still on the masked lady from the night before so he didn't pay no mind. "Do I have to say blackbird for you to not do that again?" She smiled and Jake frowned in confusion. He took a long look at you and looked down at your form. His eyes opened wide as he recognized you. A smile stretched his lips as he finally got a face to put on your body. "It's you." He said, trying to learn the color of your eyes by heart. "It's me." You smiled at him and noticed how even more handsome he looked during daylight.
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taglist: @hardballoonlove @blue-aconite @iliketopgun @callsign-hummingbird @roosterforme @senawashere @jessicab1991
@atarmychick007 @hangmansgbaby @callsigns-haze @callsign-magnolia @els-marvelvsp @djs8891 @phoenix-rising-starbird-one
@floydsglasses @hangmanbrainrot @selencgraphy @books4ever03 @shanimallina87 @averagewriter-inthedark @theglenaissance
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oval3000 · 1 year ago
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Chapter 2
Yandere Psych Patient König x Nurse Reader
Warning: Possesive, Obsession, Death, Gore, Blood, Smut, Toxic behavior, age gap.
Chapter 1
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
(This story might suck idk)
-------------------------------------------------------
Jacob slammed one of the medicine drawers close after getting the bottle of pills from a specific patient. "I don't know what miracle came down here, but we haven't had an accident in a month." He said to a fellow nurse standing next to him.
"Don't jinx it," she said grabbing the pill bottle from his hands.
"You know," he stared at your section, watching as you typed what you needed into the computer," ever since she started working here, König hasn't bashed anyone's heads."
"Well it's only been a month since she started working here, I wouldn't be relieved yet." She said, popping two pills into a Dixie cup.
"Yeah well I'm very optimistic about this." He got up and walked away. "Oh if the drawer gets stuck again, just bang on it a few times."
"It would be better if they just get new ones," she sighed, walking away towards her row of patients.
He rolled his eyes, "please they're too stingy to buy new bed sheets."
You have been working here for a month and so far everything was okay. You do what you need to do and things go smoothly.
As for König, he hasn't said or do anything towards you. You honestly felt like they were fooling you by telling you all those stories about his past nurses and guards.
You learned more about the staff names on all floors. König's two guards are named Eli and Gabriel. They both make sure that nothing happens to you aswell as any other staff.
You met Dr. Smith. You first impression of her was a little stiff. Mainly because she was direct and serious. She doesn't really make small talk to any of the nurses only the administrator. She also doesn't really fond of you. Well it's not like she hates you, is more of she critics anything you do. From the way you gather the medical supplies to the way you check patients vitals. During her visit with König, you stay outside the room so you don't know what goes on in there.
You saw when she exited the room alongside Eli and Gabriel, taking König back to his room. You didn't need to look up to know that Dr. Smith was walking towards, her heels made it obvious. "He will no longer take his usual calming medication, he'll take this one." She gave you the doctors order.
"benzodiazepines?" He was fine with his usual one.
She looked at you with her eyebrows forward "Yes. Is there a problem."
"Wouldn't the short term use cause him more problems compared to how he is now. I mean, he's been doing good lately and his oth-'
"Are you a doctor (Y/n)?" She tilted her head as she gives you a serious stern look.
"No."
"Right, I call shots for what is good for my patients. So if I tell you to order his new medicine then you order his new medicine! Is there a problem!?" Her high pitch tone caused the other nurses to look at you.
You look around mentally slapping yourself in the face. Of course she knows more than you, you are just a nurse. "No, Dr. Smith. I'll order them asap."
"Good. Make sure that his primary physician knows about it too and next time you question me, go back to school to get a lab coat. You are a nurse, you do what I say."
She left leaving the echo of her heels scraping the white tile floors. You cursed under your breath while picking up the phone. Calling in orders for prescription is a pain in the ass. Well the hospital it is, you're not familiar with a psychiatric hospital. The last thing you need is to be at hold for three hours trying to get it through.
"We need medical attention at room #526!" You heard Eli. You quickly ran to König's room and saw Gabriel on the floor, holding his mouth as blood was coming out. You turned your head to take a look at König. He was standing there with blood on his nuckles. He's tall, you never got a good look on how tall he was. This man is a mountain an actual mountain.
"What happened?" Jacob entered in seeing the mess.
"I need gauze pads and bandages.' You said holding onto Gabriel. König saw as you attended him. You're his nurse not Gabriel's. You should be attending König not him. The other guards came in to help Gabriel getting up while the others trying to hold König down. Jacob came in with the medical tray. He flicked a needle, trying to get any air bubbles out. You got up as they took Gabriel out, "what are you doing?"
"Everytime he does this, we have to put him down" He made his way towards König while two other guards were trying to hold him down. Compared to the guards themselves they looked like little children against König.
You went in front of Jacob, "You don't have to do that. It will make him think more irrationally. Please he is my patient."
He lowered the needle down giving you a sigh, "Fine. I'll go make a report. But you still can't be here unless two guards are present."
"Okay." The two guards let König's arms go.
Eli and Jacob left to talk to the administrator. You picked up the gauze pads and bandage from the trey.
You haven't made eye contact with König. You've always been too nervous about that, but you had to see him to examine him. You saw him, you saw his face. He had stuble. His features are strong and sharp, his jawline looks like it can cut anybody. He had scars on his face one through his mouth and the other one through his eye. His eyes are blue a nice clear blue, which stood out against his dark under circles. He was probably the most handsome patient you have ever seen. No, not patient, the most handsome men you have ever seen.
You walk towards him, slowly. You looked up to him, your face aligned to his torso . His white t-shirt was snuged and hugged all his curves on his abdomen. You can see the outline of his perfect abs and chest area. His biceps make it look the arm holes of his shirt are going to pop open. His hair was a perfect shade of brown, almost golden. Like before, it wasn't long or short, it was a good length, enough to make a little lazy ponytail.
You stuck out your hand as he placed his on top of yours. Your hand looks barley visible compared to his. You took a peace of gauze and dabbed it on his bloody nuckle. He didn't have any wounds from the punch he gave grabriel. If anything, the blood you are wiping away is Gabriel's.
König stared at you. He saw how concentrated you are with him, how gentle you are with him and how carring you are to him. The fact that you stood up for him from getting sedated, it was a like a call for him that you are his officially.
I mean he did it for you. No one knows the other half the story, they always accuse of the one that looks guilty. When Eli and Gabriel went to take him back to his room, König heard the comments they made about you. All the comments made by Gabriel.
Sure, Gabriel is nice to you, but he looks like a jerk and he is one. He's nice to you, but behind your back he thinks you are an object. Talking about how he wants to take you, not for a date, but for a nice dinner so that he can fuck you later in his car and most likely never talk to you again afterwards...unless he's desperate for sex again
König couldn't let that slide. Talking about you like a sex toy. Talking about you like you don't have emotions. Yes, König has killed men and women that don't really deserve it, but you. Someone that stood up for him. That attends when he needs or wants something. He wanted Jell-O during lunch, but no one was giving him one. Then you came inside the dining room and saw that he didn't have Jell-O like the rest so you gave him one. It's like you read his mind. You don't deserve to be treated this way. It reminds him of himself when he was a kid.
Being bullied for just being nice, for being who he is. He wants to protect you that's all he wanted to do. So he punch Gabriel after hearing his plan to seduce and fuck you then leaving you alone for yourself without a care in the world. He was easy, just one punch and he was down on floor holding his bloody mouth.
You cleaned him up and sat him down on his bed. He wanted to grab your waist and pull you closer to him. To kiss you as a thank you.
He was never lucky with the women, who would be with someone who's a looser. He remembers the time in high-school when girls will ask him out only to laugh at his face when he thought they were serious. Before he left to go to the military he met a girl. The girl just wanted some free drinks so she talked into him for some free stuff. He lost his virginity to her and felt as if he found the one. But to her he was her wallet, a way to get free things and rides for her and her friends. He bought her flowers, teddy bears, chocolates. Took her out to romantic dates that he tried so hard to assemble. Only to walk in on her having sex with another men, in his bedroom on his bed in his place that he pays for. He hoped that she was just drunk or scared..maybe, but no.
"Seriously König, you thought that I cared about you? I mean you are not even good at sex. I was just using you for the free stuff. I just wanted free drinks jeez! It's not my fault you couldn't take a hint."
He saw how they both laughed at his face. How they both just sat there naked, laughing at him as if he was the punchline to a joke.
"Believe me I never wanted this to happen! Especially after getting that dam abortion. But it doesn't matter cause you paid for it."
She wanted money to buy a new dress. She used it to have an abortion. He felt tears running down his face. They didn't feel bad, no, they laughed harder at him at how pathetic he was.
"Why would I even be with a looser."
He remembered how those kids would push him down the slide. How they would rip away his comic books. How they broke everyone one of his toys.
"Looser!"
"Looser!Looser!"
his fist turned white, he felt his fingernails, cutting deep into his palm. The girl he thought was the one was taunting him along his boy toy. He walked up to them. They expected him to bawl like a baby and beg for an apology. Instead, he choked her. His hands gripped tight around her neck. He felt some punches coming from her boy toy, telling König to stop, to let her go.
He saw as the life of her eyes went away. He heard as her neck cracked and dropped her back on the bed. He turned the guy, choking him to death aswell.
He hid the bodies, ran away, joined the military and found a new way to live.
You heard other male voices coming from the elevator and the administrator coming in. "What happened!?"
"He attacked Gabriel." You said to him, you saw what was behind him, other doctors.
"Put him in a straitjacket." He pointed to König
"What no!" You said getting in between him and König.
"Excuse me!?"
"Putting him in a straitjacket isn't going to solve anything."
He crossed his arms while looking down at you "Doing nothing will solve nothing, (Y/n)!"
You turned to König who had a stoic expression "I know, but I'm sure there are oth-"
"What are you again, (Y/n)?" he blurted out.
You knew where this is going. Twice in one day, you wanted to crawl into a hole and die. "A nurse."
He gave you a small smirk, the same one Dr. Smith gave you. "Exactly. A nurse. I'm your superior, you don't get to tell me what to do. Your job is to take his vitals, and give him medication not to throw orders around! Do I make myself clear!" He stepped closer to you. You wanted to back away, but you felt frozen. He was directly infront of your face. "Now, move aside so we can our jobs!"
You looked down on the floor. You never felt so light headed as you did now. The other voices coming from them were echoes. You felt nausea and sweating. Your heart felt like it was pounding from your chest, but it sounded like a blur. "S-sorry.. sir." You always feel week when people yell at you.
"Next time you do something like that, you're out of here, (Y/n). " He said as you all watched König being put in a straitjacket.
The administrator, Ben, saw König. He was taken back a bit. The look he gave him. As if he was killing him right on the spot. König no longer had the stoic expression, he gave him a death stare.
Who does he think he is to yell at you for being nice to him. To threatened her. They are all the same. Everyone here is all same. The same kids that shoved him around the boys bathroom when he was 10. The same as those girls that laughed at him that laughed at his face.
But instead of him being the victim, is you. You're so weak and innocent, how can someone treat you like that.
But it's okay because you'll have König by his side. He'll make sure to save you.
To care for you.
To love you.
To make you his.
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emojellyace08 · 1 year ago
Note
Hiii! I love the way you write and I was wondering if I could make a request (only if you want)
So how about the lookism boys reaction to an extremely beautiful and ethereal fem!reader who is like so feminine and ethereal she looks like a princess from a fairytale and even animals love her??
Anyways remember to stay safe and healthy!!
Lookism Men x Stunning Fem! Reader
Hiii Thanks for the request @jejegilipollas! This kind of reminds me of a Disney Princess reader! I'll be doing headcannons for almost every Lookism Men so I wouldn't leave out who you actually simp for xD. And remember all of us are really pretty in our on ways and we're all equal. And stay safe and healthy too! Warnings: insecurities, mentions of trauma, mature themes for the bottom/second part Genre: fluff ☁️ angst 🥀, slight lemon/smut 🍋 slight crack (comedy)🧨 ︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿
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Daniel Park/Jay Hong/Zack Lee/Vasco/Eli Jang/Warren Chae/Jerry Kwon/Johan Seong/Jake Kim/Sinu Han/Duke Pyeon/Jace Park/Line Man/Brad Lee/Jiho Park/Magami Kenta/Young Jinyoung Park/Young Gapryong Kim/Jichang Kwak/Taesoo Ma/Xiaoleoung/Jihan Kwak/Jibeom Kwak/Yuseong
He doesn't really prioritize having a "Goddess or too good to be true looking girlfriend" since he already has lots of trauma and he's been really stressful lately. So having a dependable, trust-worthy, and helpful partner is enough for him.
But when he saw you, a transferee student/staff on his school/working place he couldn't stop staring at you. He may look like a creep so when you turn in his direction, so he'll look away pretty fast. But you took notice of this and knowing your friendly personality and warm vibes, you thought befriending him isn't a bad idea.
So when you approached him, he couldn't help but to blush and be awkward around you. He thinks that you're too good for him and he's out of your league. Your smart, pretty, kind, you name it. Because of his insecurities getting in his way, he doesn't really know if he even deserves to stay beside you. But after getting to know you better, you're not really a judgmental person and you're always staying beside him even when things aren't really going well for him. So he really learned how to trust you more.
He's also the type to innocently admire your beauty. He'll definitely shower you with lots of pure compliments! "Hi Y/N!" "Oh hello." you greeted him back with a soft voice as he noticed your hair tied in a different hair style since you often let your hair be loose down. "Your hair looks pretty today." he complimented you while rubbing his nape feeling shy. "Oh really? Thank you!" you smiled back at him, you've been feeling down lately because of your pretty privilege making you insecure. But his compliments just makes your day better. "Yeah, no problem."
You may not know it but it's obvious that he's an animal lover. And he always adopts or feed stray pups and kittens who either lost their way or have gotten abandoned by their animal parent or owner. So you asked him about this and he seems pretty flustered when you brought about the topic and you couldn't help but to giggle at his reaction. Oh God, your voice sounds so pretty. He really can't help but to admire you even more. He just really can't help but to compliment you a lot though you can hear the shy and bashful tone beneath his voice.
So when you're walking home after school/work, you saw a little kitten crying near the road. You decided to gently approach the animal since it can get hurt by a vehicle if you just let it be. You called for it's attention with a sweet voice. And unexpectedly, the cute furball didn't hesitate to rub her body on your leg making you chuckle. "You found a stray kitten?" you heard a familiar voice as you turned around to see that it's just him making you sigh. "Jesus, you scared me" you replied back as he softly chuckled and squatted down beside you making sure that he wouldn't scare the kitten away. "Shh, don't worry little one he's a nice guy" you cooed as he was shocked at your statement. Him? A nice guy? He couldn't help but frown thinking about the things he have done and the names people called him. He feels like you're too good for him, yet you're like a fire in a cold snowy weather. It may seems like your warm feeling can hurt him, but it's in fact the opposite. You made him feel, what's the word. Relaxed? Comfortable? He doesn't really know as he couldn't stay away from you no matter how many times he tried.
"So umm..." "Yes?" you asked him in a sweet tone as he tried completing his sentence, he couldn't help but stutter since he's been hiding his true feelings for you for a long time now. "I have pet food on my house, would you mind if we take her home?" he requested as your eyes sparkled. "Really? Sure! I was also planning to buy her food since it looks like she hasn't been fed for days." "Okay, but do you think you can carry her? Stray cats may have rabies if you got bitten y'know" he reminded you as you chuckled once again. "Don't worry. She let me touch her and it seems like she's getting used with my presence" "Sure. Let's go now" he stood up as you picked the little kitty on your warm arms. "So what will you name her?" he asked on his way home as you followed next to him. "Meowy!" (Chainsaw Man reference lol) "Meowy?" "Yeah. I couldn't think of a cool name. And when I saw her she didn't even hesitate to greet me, so I think Meowy will be her name" you stated as he can still see the light behind your eyes (MCR reference lol) as you petted the animal already felling asleep. He smiled at you as he thought how not only how beautiful you are, you also have a good heart. "Meowy is a pretty name. You should keep it" he replied back as you smiled at him and continued to thank him for helping you out on taking care of the little kitten. Can he just enjoy this moment with you? He have forgotten the danger outside the world as he has the desire to protect you. You really are his sunshine.
Gun Park/Samuel Seo/James Lee or DG/Magami Kenta/Hudson Ahn/Vin Ho Bin(Vin Jin)/Cheong Taejin/Mandeok/Olly Wang/Jiho Park (villain arc)
For the most part, he's not the type to be looking for a date unlike the others. He's not a hopeless romantic.
Though if he founds someone attractive he can't help himself to do the fling with them, releasing his stress on someone while making himself feel good. Yep, he's only fucking someone just so he can pleasure himself. Nothing more and nothing less.
But he can't help but to curious the moment he laid his eyes on you. You're cute to be honest, he won't deny that. You look and act so fragile, innocent most likely. You're also very gentle, sweet and passionate. Contrasting his wild and bold side. He's like a wild animal. He's harsh, aggressive and cold. He never has the desire to be involved on a romantic relationship. He finds the idea of it cringy to be honest. He finds it making him vulnerable. And he finds the idea of having a soft spot on someone well what's the word, to be honest he can't put words on the idea of it.
He does wonder sometimes if he actually lived a decent life, but that doesn't mean that he has regrets of becoming who he is today. He's strong and he can handle things on his own which makes him proud of himself. But hearing it from you and showering him with pure and genuine compliments sounds and feel very different. "Wow! You're so cool and strong!" you stated as your eyes sparkled like little stars on the dark, starry night. He smirked at this, he must admit that you look so innocent and if you continued to act like this, he wouldn't hesitate to give you a kiss if he's more affectionate. "Well I know" he simply replied. Thinking about this moments make his head ache and his stomach grumble. It's not because he's sick, but is it because of what most called butterflies? He chuckled at the thought of it. It's useless. He doesn't need anybody let alone a girl, but he'll often look for your presence when you and him are away for each other even if it's not a very long time.
And it makes him wonder why do you always stay on his side. You and him are too different. You actually lived a decent and peaceful life with a healthy environment, unlike him who's always surrounded by thugs and who's often obsessed with money, power, drugs, alcohol and sex. As much as he doesn't want to admit it, he does like you. That's why he's always pushing you away. He doesn't want you to get hurt. And he'll definitely kicked someone's ass if they ever tried to lay their hands on you.
"Hey," he called for your attention as you looked at him with those doe-like eyes. His voice sounds a bit harsh and demanding, but after getting to know him better and getting close to him you know that he's just like that to everybody. And you know that he actually doesn't mean it to be like that. "Yes?" you asked him softly as he made eye-contact. "Why do you always stay next to me?" he asked curiously as it made you slightly upset to be honest. Does he think of you as a burden? Are you annoying? Well despite you always getting compliments from other people about how you look like a princess or Goddess that popped on a fairy tail and given life, you're actually insecure about yourself. Your gentle and feminine side can be annoying to some. You can't help but to feel like a little child that always needed to be protected and taken care of. And you often cared too much about others making you a people pleaser. "What do you mean?" you chuckled trying to hide your distress but he took notice of this. He doesn't mean to be rude, he sighed as he reconstructed his statement since you misunderstood it in the wrong way. "I mean, why do you stay beside me? You can get hurt you know?" he stated as your eyes sparkled once again. "Ahh, you mean in that way?" "Yeah." "Well, because you're really nice!" you honestly answered as he was shocked by your response. Really? Most people viewed him as an asshole for beating them up for his work. "You're joking right?" "Why do you think I'm joking? You're strong, kind well in some times, and you actually protected me when I need help." you smiled at him once again as he looked from a different direction trying to hide his blush. So far, that's the most genuine compliment he got from someone else.
And he also took notice of how gentle you are with animals. Not only you help out other people, but also those street kittens and pups that randomly pop up on streets. He just finds owning a pet a bit stressful since he already has lots of responsibility in his shoulders. "PLEASE CAN WE ADOPT HIM!" you pleaded as you cling on his arms making him groan. "No." "WHY!" "Well, I can't take care of it and I don't want to." he answered honestly but in a brutal way making you frown. If you have dog ears right now it will droop down and your eyes got bigger again like you're about to cry. "Please? I'll take care of it..." you put your hands together begging as he stares at you. He honestly find it cringy since he doesn't know if you're doing that on purpose or if you're just too soft. Not being able to stop you, he sighed. "Fine, but don't ask me to be his babysitter." he looked away as you smiled once again. "C'mon just tell me that you also find him cute!" "Shut up..." he may sound rude, but you can see that little smirk forming on his lips.
Goo Kim/Jake Kim/Kuroda Ryuhei/Yoojin/Sinu Han
This men will be a 100% simp for you (especially Goo and Ryuhei). He just founds you really hot, cute and pretty! Well you name it.
In some levels, they do care about their partner's appearance (remember having preferences are not bad ladies and gentle man). But they actually do not belittle others who are not their taste especially women since for the most part. He's a gentleman (or he tries to be).
To be honest, they're just secretly horny lmao. Remember they're still men so having a partner with a beautiful face and body just makes him worked up. Like, you don't have a right to be this pretty (he just praises you at this point).
But he does know deep inside that looks are not just a fundamental in having a partner. He does care about personality. He just honestly can't stand women who looks hot but just acts annoying and bitchy most of the time. It turns him off the most. But meeting you is one of the best blessing he have. Not only you look like a deity, but you also act like one. He just thought you're an angel who fell from the sky, in this hellish place called Earth. Did God sent you for him? Is life not finally being an ass to him? Who knows.
He'll also compliment you 24/7. Like his mouth just wouldn't stop talking about you. Like, in some levels you kind of find it annoying especially if you're the quiet one. You also probably thought at first that he's a perv but he's just being honest and appreciative! So you just brushed it off and you actually started appreciating his comments about you since it's not harming you in anyways. In fact it also boosts your confidence even more. "Y/N do you know how pretty you are?" he teased just to get a reaction out of you (and he also likes making you smile H:LKHDL:KHAL:KFH:LDKHA) "Of course I do" you smirked as you played along with him. "Well you actually look like a koala" "HEY THAT'S RUDE!" you stated as he laughed at your reaction "BUT KOALAS ARE CUTE!".
He also finds it adorable when you adopt stray animals. He just finds you "waifu material" girl. He also fantasizes about adopting 5 kittens or puppies with you and living on a peaceful and small town. You know, just the normal couple living their best life. Though he wouldn't be open about it since he finds it lowkey embarrassing lmao. "BABE! I FOUND A KITTEN ON A STREET!" "C'mon Y/N it's the fifth time you adopted a cat. Are you making an orphanage out of animals?" he teased as your kitten named Pebbles cling into him like a toddler begging for his dad's attention. "Please? I already have a name for her" you pleaded as he sighed knowing that he can't stop your motherly behavior with animals and besides he finds the cat cute too, it's a pure white kitten with blue sapphire like eyes. "What's her name though?" he asked curiously as you smiled and named the cat Snow. "Why won't you name her Elsa?" "C'mon love you make too much jokes." you sighed trying not to laugh as he chuckled at your reaction. "I'm just kidding, besides Snow's a really fitting name." he gently picked the cat on your arms and petting it. He just finds you daring. You're more than just your looks and he finds that fascinating :3.
A/N: I hope you really like it! It's kind of rushed yet late lmao. And I'm more of a cat person than a dog person but I still hoped you liked it!
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elimoskowitzs-wife · 4 months ago
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Eli moskowitz x fem Diaz reader
Warnings-making out, swearing, hickeys, pre hawk, idk if its a warning but mentions of anxiety
Note- this is a eli moskowitz pre hawk but with hawks relationship behaviour if that makes sence
It was the night of the halloween dance you shown up with your twin brother Miguel, Miguel in his skeleton costume and you was in a nurses outfit but with a extremely short skirt
'oooh skeleton costume classic' demetri said before looking at you 'nurse guessing your matching with eli'. 'thanks demitri and I like your sorcerer costume' Miguel looked at his friend who looked back in shock 'I'm a necromancer did you not see the amulet' demitri jokingly scoffs
You and eli was hugging 'so are you a regular doctor or' Miguel looked at his twin sisters boyfriend who is also is his best friend 'I uh I'm a plastic surgeon I uh fix lips' eli stuttered out
You all went to the punch table eli drinking under his mask so you whispered in his ear that he didn't need to and it made him go a light shade of pink when you was having a sip of punch he moved some hair out your eyes and u smile at him
You all go stand outside you was sorting your skirt out the wind blowing at you all while eli was stood his hands on the side of your skirt keeping it from blowing up
'want to come mine after' eli pulls his mask from his face so you could hear him better 'yeah I'll get Miguel to tell my mum' you shivered when a strong gust of wind blows at you all demitri and Miguel having there own conversations
Eli took his jacket off and placed it on you rubbing your arms to keep you warm
After the dance.
Eli's mum picked you both up once eli and you got in the car eli took his mask off 'this is yn' eli said to his mum as you nervously waved at the brown hair woman in the driver's seat
Your legs was bobbing up and down from anxiety you moved your hair over your neck to hide the little bite mark off eli on your neck
Once you got to his house he pulled you to his room and sat you on his bed 'eli keep the door slightly open I was a teenager once before belive it or not' his mum shouts
You and eli was taking photos and putting them on Instagram you both had private accounts so only a few people could see them
@ xYn.DiazXx my beautiful girl it was a photo of the pair of you and he had a red lipstick mark on his cheek
You was sat on eli's lap and he kept kissing you till he kept hold of the kiss your hand was on his jaw and his was on your hips eli's tounge entered your mouth and you smirked against his lips
Once you both pulled away from eachother to cat your breath you both smiled at eachother
Eli pulled you back in by your hips kissing you again your left hand was in his hair your right one still on his jaw
Eli's right hand moved from your hip to your butt causing you to let out a small whimper
You gripped onto his shirt and eli smirked moving his other hand to your butt making you squirm he kept smirking till your stone cold hands touched his stomach and he gasped
The next thing you know is that your pulling away to the sound of eli's mum and your mum at his bedroom door you both jumped
'me and eli's mum are gonna have a coffee so gather yourselfs together' Carmen your mum said in shock of her extremely shy daughter and shy best friend that was a secret boyfriend that Miguel knew before her was heavily making out
You went bright red embarresed you both look on eli's wardrobe mirror to see eli's neck a mess in dark purple marks and yours in purple marks
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moonsaver · 6 months ago
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Good day moon! Okay I normally don't do asks when it comes to yandere cause it's not my usual thing but seeing the last post you made of Yan!Sunday and his darling, that one where he just desperately wants to have that normalcy in their relationship but couldn't ever have it because of what he's done, made me think of something rather angsty; like how the darling's backlashes against his affections would probably go turn for the worst as time passes on, they don't hate him in a sense because he's really trying hard to not make them hate him and they can see that his love is real (just really fucked up) but that deep urge to hurt the person who took their freedom away is still there, it wouldn't just go away just because he loves them so much that he wouldn't dare to break them. Oh that satisfaction on seeing Sunday looking so hurt after yelling at him, they know it doesn't make them any better than him but at that point, what else is there for them to lose? Maybe in hurting him so subtly, they may find some pity in themselves for him to actually give him some semblance of love but until then, all Sunday ever receives from them are either silent treatment or backlash
Such relationship could only thrive in the worst way possible and maybe Sunday knows that but even then, he still holds out that little (delusional) hope that maybe his darling will still love him someday
Sorry for the rant, it's just that I feel for Sunday but his method will never work and it'll just deeply hurt him and his darling in the end asgfjgsfg also if it's alright, I'd request this but I'll leave it to you with how you write it, be it an imagine or anything else since I'm fine with it!
- Elys
Hello Elys! Im so sorry it took a long time for me to get to your request lol, tons of things got in the way but I remembered this request for a while.
In any case, I feel you've summed it up quite well!
Sunday isn't harsh or as brutal as I imagine him. Unlike my [i have to self advertise here, sorry HAHA] soft yan!blade, Sunday most likely wouldn't even need a bit of working around to be a softer yandere.
He's so loving, it's painful. His love is like despaired poetry for a lover who is still alive, just further than their reach. I imagine his love to be very tender, even as a yandere, if he doesn't become even softer.
And it's hard to convince him he's wrong – mainly because he already knows. But rather that's a bit distorted in his view; instead he thinks it's a wrongdoing against your nature as someone who wants to be free, but correct in the context of the situation rather than actually understanding it is absolutely wrong in general. And he doesn't budge. He's stubborn, almost infuriatingly. And instead of getting angry, I imagine he rather looks disappointed or disgruntled, which somehow does more damage/strikes more fear than anger.
And it's still heartbreaking; frustratingly for both of you, not just yourself.
You lash out, you scream, cry, wail, argue, relentlessly push and resist against him. it's your only way of getting back at him, you're sure as hell you're going to strike the hardest that way. And you relish the hurt you see in the eyes of your captor, but something more sympathetic tugs at you when you see his lovingly sad eyes. It's this cacophony of guilt, frustration, anger, and utter despair at the loss of your freedom. Sunday feels all of it, aswell, and you want to be relieved that he does – if it weren't for the fact he still wasn't letting you go.
He continually withholds your freedom from you. That single injustice to you is enough to weather your patience over time – your anger only burns hotter and hotter, pushing away any semblance of sympathy or reasoning, and it only hurts Sunday more, until you realise what you're doing, and quietly give in to sooth him for the time being. Just a little. Until that little injustice starts bothering you again. It's a toxic cycle.
And it hurts even more when Sunday tries to find normalcy in your relationship; he's trying so hard to be your lover, to hold you gently and bathe you with care, to dry you off and still love you after seeing you bare. He wants to come home and see you smile, be happy, elated that he's there, just as he feels when he sees you. But that's not what happens. His delusions and flimsy expectations are shattered the moment he steps into the dimly lit room, your form refusing to even look at him. The silence is strangely stronger than his hopes.
Anyways, that's all i can think of at the moment. I love angst yandere sunday time.
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starry-bi-sky · 9 months ago
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im having more fem Danyal thoughts. But specifically I've been thinking about Dani in this au. Now, Fem Danyal is just the alt. version of Danny to my other DAG au, which means she follows that lore. that being said. Danyal and Dani already had a pretty rocky introduction in the first place, ANd if we follow canon's setup, Dani in fem!Danyal's world would be a boy rather than a girl. I'm gonna call him Ali for easier difference (my train of thought was Daniel -> Eli -> Ali). While Danny may resemble Talia more than Bruce, Danny and Damian still look very similar to each other. Their blood relation is unquestionable.
You can imagine how fem Danyal might feel, walking into her room one day after school, and finding a little boy on her bed who looks, at first glance, like the little brother she loves to death. If meeting Ellie triggered Kill Bill Sirens in Danny's head, meeting Ali bass boosted them. For a terrifying, fleeting moment, Danny thinks Damian is right there. That somehow, her clever, intelligent little brother found out she was alive and tracked her down.
She slams the door shut, completely at a loss for words. Her heart has nearly stopped a second time. Then she realizes: this boy's eyes are blue. Not green. He looks too old to be her brother. His jawline too narrow, his hair too messy. As he talks, his voice is not the same as the sparse few videos on the internet showing Damian speaking. This is not the child she helped take his first steps with, nor the child she watched utter his first words. This is not the boy whom she taught to pick up a sword; this is not her brother.
Safe to say, Ali gets a knife pulled on him much, much faster than his female counterpart did. He lives, fortunately, but their relationship is unsteady and rocky even after Ali betrays Vlad and joins Danny.
Danny is unsettled by him, not for being her clone -- although that plays a minor part -- but because every time he drifts into her peripherals, she keeps thinking it's Damian. And it spooks her half out of her mind. She gets her hopes up at the same time her heart drops, then she turns her head, and it's not Damian; it's Dani.
It's also why she won't call him 'Dani', it's one letter too close to 'Dami' and she's afraid she'll call him that if she's not careful. So when he brings it up jokingly, she immediately shoots it down; "I'll call you Eli." instead. (Ali thinks she's boring -- he thought 'danny with a y' and 'dani with an i' was funny. Frankly, so did Danny, but she's too uncomfortable with the idea of calling him Dani.)
When he asks her why, she lies and says it's to prevent confusion. When their relationship is better, "Eli" eventually becomes "Ali".
("Why Ali?" he'll ask her, with an ear pressed against her ribs while Danny coils one of his curls around her finger. She's steadily become more and more affectionate; Danny has the impeccable ability of making it seem so forced and stiff and natural at the same time.)
("Do you not like it?" She'll ask him, voice stilted and unsure. She's got her heart in her throat, but she's starting to stop seeing Damian whenever she looks down. "We can keep it Eli if you'd like.")
("No, no. I like it. Just... why Ali? Does it mean anything?")
(Danny will smooth her palm over Ali's forehead, scratching his hairline with her nails, and feel embarrassed. She'll be silent until he looks up at her, and then she clears her throat. "It means eminent; exalted; noble.")
(Ali stares at her in dead silence, long enough that she starts to grow worried. Then tears bubble up in his eyes, and for a moment Danny thinks she said something wrong. "I lied;" he croaks, "I love it.")
(She will hesitate, and then wipe the tears off with her thumbs. "Ali al Ghul," she'll mutter, "but that name is for you and I only. To the world, you're Ali Fenton." Perhaps she shouldn't be giving him her mother's last name, but he is of her blood now too.)
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unholyhelbig · 5 months ago
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I’ve always been curious about Kate bishops background and would love to hear a paraphrased version if ur okay with it
[Absolutely I can! Just a little disclaimer, I'm doing this mostly from memory, so I may get a few things wrong. But I promise the gist is there, and this has gotten way too long, so uh... part one? I guess? I didn't even get to the vampires. If people are into this. I'll keep going.]
Okay, let’s start with Kate’s backstory.
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The Bishop family has issues. Eleanor, Kate’s mom, is distant but portrayed as a generally good person. She and her husband Derek have an estranged relationship. She travels a lot and is regarded as an activist throughout her life until her untimely death when Kate is still just a kid.
Kate develops admiration for her father. He’s a publishing magnate but it’s soon revealed that he has ties to the crime world. Kate, despite her young age, follows her father to a meeting with El Matador. While there, she gets captured by the crime lord to be held for ransom.
This is where she see’s Clint for the first time, who saves her with the rest of the avengers. She took an instant liking to him because he was the only human on the team without advantages. At this point, she does make Clint her role model and starts to distance herself from her family to focus on activism like Eleanor.
Kate didn’t’ truly start training in combat until she was attacked in Central Park. This kicked off her love of self-defense. She originally felt isolated and in some cannon media, this moment in the park still haunts her beyond belief. (Young Avengers Special #1 [2005]  is a great comic that’s stand alone & shows the mentorship between Jessica Jones and Kate. TW for SA.)
Que the Young Avengers.
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(My personal favorite Kate Bishop Design)
Kate has an older sister that’s been completely written out of the MCU adaptation. Her name is Susan, and she doesn’t have the greatest relationship with Kate, they’re not openly hostile, but they don’t enjoy each other either. Still, Kate is in Susan’s wedding party.
During the wedding, the church comes under fire and the Young Avengers swoop in to save the day. But they awkwardly become hostages themselves and Kate uses one of Patriots throwing stars to get them out of the situation before the police show up.
Kate very ungracefully demands to become a part of the Young Avengers (The original team is: Cassie Lang, Eli Bradley, Tommy Shepard, Billy Kaplan, Nate Richards, and Teddy Altman). Kate originally doesn’t have a hero identity, so she raids the Avengers Mansion and dawns Mockingbirds staves and mask, swordsman’s sword and belt and Hawkeyes abandoned bow.
Captain America and Iron man were not happy about the team and demanded that they disband. But eventually gave in after the Young Avengers refused to back down. Kate was the only one to stand up to Steve and demand that they get better training. He agreed and put Jessica Jones in charge of the team. This is when Kate becomes Hawkeye. Steve gives her the title and the bow. She’s the unofficial leader of the Young Avengers.
What about Clint?
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Dude is dead in the Young Avengers run. Clint makes his valiant return in the massive Civil War event that Marvel comics created. He was resurrected and is absolutely pissed when he finds out that Steve gave his name and his bow away.
Clint actually attacks Kate while she’s on a date with Eli Bradley in Central Park. He’s officially Ronin at this point and is impressed by Kate’s skills after she breaks into his place to steal her bow back. He unofficially (but also totally officially) allows her to take the mantle.
The Children’s Crusade
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I’m skipping a lot of small side quests that Kate takes (even though they’re a lot of fun) because Children’s Crusade is possibly the most important part of her journey, and by the looks of it, is the basis for where the MCU is planning to go in the next few years.
Kate has a really strong friendship with Billy Kaplan, aka Billy Maximoff. He’s the strongest magic being to ever inhabit earth and when his powers become dangerous the Avengers decide to lock him up. That didn’t slide with Kate, and they ended up breaking him out of the tower and entering alternate timelines in search of Billy’s mom- Wanda Maximoff.
This was pure, time-warp chaos. Wanda had forgotten who she was and was about to marry Doctor Doom when the Young Avengers showed up and pulled her out of it. She regained her powers and her memories, coming to terms with Billy and Tommy being her sons.
Once in their original timeline, a massive fight breaks out between the Avengers and the x-men. It’s a whole thing that ends up killing Cassie Lang. Her death ends up disbanding the original Young Avengers who go their separate ways to come to terms with how dangerous being a hero really is.
Matt Fraction? Matt Fraction.
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Listen, if you’re looking for the inspiration behind the general vibe of the show Hawkeye, this is the run for you. If you read anything from Kate’s comic journey, let it be this. You don’t need any prior knowledge to Kate or Clint to enjoy this one and the artwork heavily inspired the intro to the show.
In this series, Clint is the owner of an apartment building that’s since been taken over by the tracksuit mafia. Kate and Clint have an established friendship and the dynamic is very much like the show. But grittier. The series leans into Clint’s deafness and Kate’s trauma. It’s a basis for their relationship.
Los Angeles, baby
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Kate goes to LA a lot. It’s her home away from New York and her arcs there are some of my favorite (it’s a guilty pleasure, honestly). During her run with Matt Fraction’s Hawkeye, she has a particularly bad fight with Clint. She takes Lucky and jets off to the beach to find her niche.
Kate becomes a very cool, very chill private eye for her first solo run; Hawkeye Private Eye. While she does eventually go back to New York to help out Clint, she starts her own business in Los Angeles where she teams up with Jessica Jones and Laura x23. Very fun, very goofy series.
[This took...hours. Literal Hours. But I have access to all the digital archives for Kate so, I'm more than happy to keep going lol]
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killersfool · 1 year ago
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hii! not sure if you’re open to requests but i’m going to give u a few ideas! most of these are for elijah hewson😭
falling asleep on the couch, waking up to not only a blanket around them, but eli squeezed in behind them
being in the studio with the band and messing about?? making jokes and being silly!
kissing and dancing in the kitchen to an old singe they both like?
eli taking care of you when you’re sick and just being super soft and caring!
spending valentine’s day together!
something about the reader playing with eli’s fingers to calm them down?
softly smiling at each other from across the room and also reassuring touches!
telling each other how much they love them
them cuddling in bed and pulling eachother closer
hope these spark your writing :))))
Kiss It Better | ELIJAH HEWSON
here's a short little thing inspired by this request!
PAIRING: elijah hewson x f!reader
WORDS: 1.5k
SUMMARY: eli's girlfriend is ill, elijah comforts her.
GENRE: hurt/comfort, fluff
WARNINGS: references to throwing up
I've never been so ill in my life. My nose is so runny. I've almost used every single packet of tissues in the kitchen cabinet right under the sink — which used to be a lot and now is very little. I've thrown up my insides into the loo way too many times to count on my fingers. Bent over the toilet, eyes pricking with tears, I've never felt so useless. At least the thought of my boyfriend getting back after his gig gives me something to look forward to. But it's far too late.
I'm staring at the TV screen. I hug my knees to my chest, attempting to generate some warmth. The blanket is upstairs — probably hiding in the space between the bed and the wall. Surely, if I attempt to stumble upstairs now, I'll just get stuck and end up falling asleep in the corridor.
I can't stop glancing at the door. I'm hoping for a doorknob twist, knock, ring of the doorbell, stamp of boots, low and raspy post-concert voice. But I'm just met with nothing. No signs of his arrival. He hasn't called me. He usually doesn't. He likes to surprise me. After having the worst migraine of my life, it would give me some comfort if he just gave me a hug. A warm Elijah Hewson hug would cleanse my mind.
Starting to realise that the TV is doing more harm than good, I switch it off. I'm beginning to see blurry triangular shapes and my eyes burn like they're on fire. The living room is pitch black. I'm freezing. I'm tired. I take two paracetamol tablets and chug some water. Curling up on my side, legs on the armrest, I close my eyes.
-
I wake up. Sunlight gleams through the gaps in the white curtains. My body is wrapped in a duvet, soft and warm. Skin is against mine. Arms are around my body, squeezing me tightly. He's shirtless. I can tell by the tufts of chest hair flicking at my shoulder. His head is on my back, curls all over my skin, lips between my shoulderblades. I don't want to move. I don't want to speak. He's asleep. Gentle snores, deep breaths, in and out.
I must've fallen into a deep sleep because I have no recollection of his arrival or him ever taking me upstairs. I'm usually a light sleeper. This migraine fully knocked me out. That's the best nights sleep I've had in a while. I'm especially thankful I managed to escape from work for the rest of the week.
Elijah's normally the little spoon when we hug like this. It's funny how the tables have turned. I think I prefer this though. But lying awake and tracing the muscles in his back always seems to calm me down.
I want to ask him how the show went and the reason for his tardiness. He had been playing in Glasgow, thankfully only a few miles away from me and had bought me tissues, chocolate and gave me an endless supply of kisses before he had to run down to meet the band.
Opening my eyes fully, I take a peek over at the bedside table. He's brought me more tissues, face masks, more chocolate and a box of sleep teabags.
I realise Elijah's awake when his fingers start to walk along my bare stomach and his mouth is at the juncture between my back and shoulder. He pulls my hair to the side, presses his wet mouth to my neck. He smells clean. I'm sure he's showered. His hair feels a little damp.
He keeps pulling me closer. Arms tightening like he's a boa constrictor. Cool rings on my stomach, large hands tugging at the waistband of my shorts.
"You feeling better?" He asks, between kisses, tongue tracing my jugular vein. It's unsettlingly nice. His words are always gruff the morning after the show. All the singing takes a toll. Makes him sound more mellow. Sometimes I worry for his vocal cords.
"Not really." I groan. A mind-numbing headache is still prodding at my brain and the brightness of the sun makes my eyes burn. He's got a hand on my forehead, cool fingers against fiery skin — checking the temperature.
"God, you're pale. And you're burning up. I should get the thermometer." He gets out of bed. The loss of weight of his body makes the mattress shift. I glance over at him. His hair has stuck up at the top, his bare back glows under the sunlight. He stands up. Sweatpants cling loosely to his hips, revealing the muscles of his abdomen and a chain circles around his neck. He leaves the room — not even giving me time to utter a word of annoyance at the sudden lack of touch.
Then he's back. He crawls into bed. The thermometer is between his index finger and thumb. I look at the cross tattoo on his palm, see the concentration on his face as he plays around with the buttons.
"It's just a migraine," I say but he's already turning it on and pointing at my mouth. I roll my eyes and separate my lips. He gives me a sly smirk, just making me sit like that for a moment. Then he puts the device beneath my tongue and waits patiently. I'm trying not to laugh at how awkward this is. I close my eyes to evade his gaze but I can still feel the force of his stare.
"You've got a fever." Dr Hewson alerts me with his expert diagnosis although the furrow of his brows makes him seem unsure. He looks down at the numbers displayed, rubbing his face with worry. "A really bad one." He's now searching up on his phone what it means.
"Should I go to the doctors?" I shuffle away from him. I don't want him to catch what I have. He has gigs all week, I don't want to ruin anything for him.
He notices my movement. Shaking his head, he drags me back towards him, making me nestle into his chest. His eyes are still darting along a website.
"I think you just need to rest. I'll make you breakfast." Elijah kisses my nose before running downstairs with his mind set solely on making some decent food.
Through the corridor, into the kitchen. He's forgotten where half the things are in the room. Opening cabinets, searching through the fridge, putting water into the kettle. Most of the time he'll get his breakfast on the way to a show. Maybe a café, maybe he'll steal some food from Ryan. Today, however, he's lucky enough to not have a gig and actually have time to look after his girlfriend. Although he's definitely going to make a mess of the place.
His final decision is to make omelettes. Oil on the frying pan, ham—leaving it to heat up until it's a little crispy. Two eggs, cracked and swirled in a glass. Cheese on top, grated with masterful excellence—at least that's what he believes. Folds it over to make it fill half of the pan. Let's it continue to fry. Then he's running over to make a cup of tea. He uses one of the sleep teabags he bought. He's just about to plate up when footsteps echo behind him.
I have to stop for a second when I walk into the kitchen. It's a rarity to see Elijah here, cooking for me. We started dating at the beginning of the tour which unluckily means that he's hardly ever home. He has to leave early in the morning and gets back really late. Whenever he has days off, he takes me on dates and walks, or we just laze around at home, basking in eachother's presence. There's times when he brings me along to the recording studio so that I can reprimand all the band members or give an outside opinion of their new songs.
Elijah seems so focused on getting this omelette perfect. He's running around the place. He grabs two pieces of bread to turn his dish into an omelette-sandwich. I stand in the doorway for a while, just watching him. But, I can't stop myself from nearing him. As he cuts an apple into a slices, I slide my arms around his stomach, pressing my head to his shoulder. He sighs quietly. I breathe in his scent, his comfort.
"You should be in bed," he whispers, although he doesn't seem to want me to let go. I shake my head as he looks at me.
There's music playing on the radio. I turn it up. It's a song by The Smiths. I'm swaying to the beat, moving Elijah along with me. He's still carefully chopping fruit into perfect pieces. Watermelon, strawberries, mango. My mouth is watering just looking at the vast array of flavours.
Elijah drops his knife, turns around to face me. His hands find my waist, his lips find my neck, his head burrows into my chest like he's a mole hiding under soil. We dance along to the crackle of music, feeling the melodies trickle into our bones. Just his presence makes me feel better, every kiss turns my negative thoughts to mush.
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uceyliyahh · 5 months ago
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UNDER YOUR TOUCH
Summary: After her difficult breakup, Tiana wanted to start anew with her life. That's when she realized her life would be better when she met him.
This fanfic is 18+! NO MINORS ALLOWED
word count: 4177
smut warning; it’ll come in the story randomly so PLEASE PLEASE look out for it I’m not really good at writing ✍🏽 smuts but I’m improving at the moment.
Jey Uso x Tiana
AWFUL GRAMMAR IM GETTING BETTER I SWEAR LOL.
comments, likes, repost are appreciated I would love the constructive feedback in what area I need to approve in. 🤍
ALSO! I don’t not want nobody stealing my fanfics or take it as theirs that will be an issue fasho so keep it cute respectfully.
I only own my OC along with the make up scenarios
But I’ll be writing along the way since this story is in my drafts on Wattpad right now so yuh. 💁🏽‍♀️
TAGS ⬇️ lmk if you wanna be tag 🏷️
@pinkwithhearts @jstarr86 @empressdede @biancasreign
@paigereeder
4.
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uceyjucey, biancabelairwwe, shelovekai, and 200,000 people liked your post.
tianasworld: gym therapy. 🧘🏽‍♀️ uceyjucey: gyatttt damn girl look at allat back there.👀 tianasworld: @ uceyjucey all yours papi. 🤍 biancabelairwwe: tink we gotta go workout together girl. shelovekai: sheesh girl uceyjucey: @ shelovekai aye, bitch ass boy stay outta her comments or yo' ass is goin' to get handled. theyhatelani: I looked way better than her trust. tianasworld: @ theyhatelani try again. 💁🏽‍♀️
Read all 88,566 comments.
TIANA I noticed that Jey's ex-girlfriend Kehlani started following me on Instagram, stalking me, and watching my stories every single time I post something that has to do with me or with Jey and me together. She would slide up and say some negative shit.
Then she would try to be funny and say some dumbass shit to make me think Josh is doing some with her when the whole time he's with me, I wasn't a stupid girl like she was I knew what he wanted.
At this point, I was at the gym sweating bullets while doing my workout routine that I normally do when Josh called me.
OTP Jey: mamas what you got goin' on right now I miss you. Tiana: I miss you too bubba, but I'm finishing up my set right now why? Jey: my family is flying out to come visit and they wanted to meet you if that's okay ion wanna overwhelm you. Tiana: Josh you aren't making me feel overwhelmed sir calm down but I wouldn't mind meeting them. Jey: great I'll come swing by and get you ight. Tiana: okay bubba.
CALLED ENDED.
'I love calling him puppy names I wonder what he had planned for today?'
I continued my workout routine, not even paying attention to Malakai coming in. I know that he had seen me doing my workout, and he felt like now was his opportunity to strike.
I felt an unfamiliar presence approaching me, and when I turned around, I saw Malakai standing there, smirking at me.
"Um, what Kai?" I asked as I pulled my headphones to the side.
"Where's yo man at? Ion see him around." He said with a cocky tone.
I just rolled my eyes at him as I folded my arms at him. He was doing way too much for my liking, honestly.
"He's at work at the moment why? Why are you worried about him?" He scoffed while keeping his arms folded.
"Shouldn't he be here with you working out? If not, I can. I mean, he can't handle all you got back there like me." I was shocked that he had this much confidence in himself, thinking he could charm my heart like that.
"Nigga for your information he can handle me and all of this I can't believe you have this much confidence." I retorted at him as I stood up because I can't deal with his ass right now.
Before I could leave, he grabbed me by my waist, not knowing that I had butt-dialed Jey's number so he could listen to what was happening right now.
He placed his hand around my throat firmly not trying to hurt me as he looked into my eyes intensely I heard Jey's voice calling for me.
"Look here, little girl. You and ol' boy better be old news, or we're going to have some issues, " he threatened.
"Mamas what's going on?"
"Get the fuck off of me Kai!" I shouted as I tried to push him off of me, but he wasn't budging, holding my throat tightly.
Jey knew what it was as he hung up the phone. Lucky for me, we had our locations, so he knew where I was at.
"I guess he isn't coming to save you dear, so why don't we workout together like we did before." He said as I punched him in his face, as he held his nose.
I gathered all of my things and ran out of the gym fast as fuck, knowing that Malakai was faster than me, but that didn't matter. I needed to get away before things got worst with his ass. I knew that he was just like his father, a woman beater.
I was not going to be around all of that man. I heard footsteps behind me, knowing that he was behind me. I didn't want to turn back, so I kept running as fast as I could.
Seeing Joshua's car pull up fast as fuck as I ran out the door running towards him, hugging him as he held me tightly, seeing Kai coming out the place with a bloody nose.
"Imma fuck yo' ass up Tiana!" Malakai threatened as he ran up to us, but Josh pulled me to the side and sucker-punched him in the face.
I stood there watching Josh beat his ass remember how I said that he was strong and could knock Malakai's head off I was serious.
He was on top of Kai, beating his head in as Kai held his hand up, protecting himself.
"Yo' ass wanna put yo' hands on my girl? Imma show yo' ass sum." Jey threatened as he kicked Kai in his stomach while dragging him by his hair.
He picked him up and threw him in the trash can near him, then came back towards me to see if I was okay.
I was shaking like crazy as he took notice, hugged me, cupped both of my cheeks, kissed my lips, and looked into my eyes.
"It's okay, mama. I'm here. ight? Did he hurt you?" he asked, his face drenched with concern.
"He choked me a bit, but other than that, I'm okay, Josh." I said as I calmed down, looking over Jey's shoulder.
He noticed my attention wasn't on him but behind him, so he turned around and saw his ex, Kehlani, standing behind us. He sighed.
"Heyyyy Jeyyy baby." Kehlani said as she went up towards him to hug him.
He pushed her away as she stood there looking displeased at his actions while she looked my way, smirking.
"Oh, I see you with yo' new bitch." She said.
Before I could say anything, Jey spoke, "Aye, watch yo' damn mouth, Kehlani." She threw her hands up in defense while chuckling.
"C'mon, Jey. You know you missed all of this. What does she have that I don't?" He scoffed at her as he put his hands on his hips again, a typical mom stance.
"Everything, and no, I don't miss allat when I have this beautiful girl next to me so yo' ass can move around," Jey said sternly as me and him went inside his car.
I could see Malakai struggling to get out of the trash can, which almost had me laughing at him, but my attention was towards Jey's ex-girlfriend as she stood there looking all pissed like a little kid.
It's no wonder he broke up with her. We pulled off from the gym and returned to his tattoo shop.
✧.*
JEY we were pulling up to my tattoo shop since I had clients today but I had to step out to deal with that earlier I couldn't believe that man put his hands on her not knowing what was finna happen to his ass.
I looked at my knuckles; they were red I hadn't beat nobody's ass in a minute and that felt good to do so, I darted my attention towards Tiana who was quiet the whole car ride I wanted to know what was she thinking or feeling right now.
I held her hands into mine as she looked at me with a faint smile. Then, back at the window, I could tell she was still tensed from what had happened, so I kissed her hand gently while focusing on the road.
✧.* When we finally pulled up to the tattoo shop, as we stepped out of the car, Tiana hadn't said anything or addressed anything about what had happened.
She walked in with me, and as we held hands, I told her I'd be done in a couple of hours so she could hang out in my office for a bit.
"I'll be done a little bit, mama, okay?" I said as she nodded her.
I sighed while rubbing my beard with both hands, and then I heard my phone ring. I checked to see that Jon was calling me.
OTP Twin📌: Yo uce what you doing? Jey: I'm back at work uce what's up? Twin📌: what's up uce you sound tensed. Jey: man I just got into some shit with Kehlani and then with my girl ex boyfriend I had to beat his ass because he put hand on her. Twin📌: woah that's insane is she good? Jey: I don't know if she's okay, she seemed a bit tensed still ion know uce. Twin📌: ight then well I was letting you know that we are getting a hotel when we land so I'll text you. Jey: ight then.
CALL ENDED.
After finishing up my last client for today, I cleaned up my equipment thoroughly. Then, I heard someone's footsteps walking this way, causing me to turn around, only to see Tiana standing there watching me.
I could read her energy right now, and she was very quiet—she didn't even say a word at all. I walked up towards her, placing my hands on her hips as she wrapped her arms around my neck.
I looked deeply into her eyes, then onto her lips, then back onto her deer eyes; I gave her a peck on her lips while grabbing her by her thighs and carrying her towards the countertop.
I plopped her down on it, getting between her legs while holding her in place. As she looked up at me, her hands were playing in my mullet.
She moved her hands towards my face as she pulled me closer, kissing me on the lips. Our lips moved in sync with each other.
I slide my tongue inside of her mouth while snaking my hand onto her ass, gripping it, causing her to moan softly. How badly I wanted to fuck her on this countertop, but I just need to know where her head was before we get into it.
I pulled away so that we could catch each other's breath as we put our foreheads against each other.
"mama, speak to me what's up?" I asked.
"I'm just still tensed about earlier Josh." Tiana said.
"princess I'm goin' to protect you at all cost don't worry I got'chu." I reassured her while playing in her hair.
I could read her expression on her face. She seemed to calm down a bit. All she needed was to hear some reassurance from me because I stood by my promise to protect her from anyone or anything.
I cupped her cheeks with both of my hands and kissed her lips.
"C'mon let's go to my crib."
✧.* OMNISCIENT Jey and Tiana were driving to her house so that she could change and shower before she had to meet his people. It kind of made her nervous and scared. She was thinking, 'What if they don't like me?'
Jey was talking to Bianca downstairs about what had happened between him and ol' boy, including his ex Kehlani.
"Wait what! He put his hands on her?" Bianca said.
"Yeah, she said he choke her, but I beat his ass good honestly." He said while rubbing his knuckles.
"Damn Joshua, but question though Joshy."
He cringed when she called him that as she laughed at him, but her face went serious for a second, "When are you goin' to ask my bestie out, sir? Y'all are honestly a cute couple as it already is and you seem the type to protect her."
She was right about that. He even told Tiana that he'd protect her. I mean, he practically loved this girl down. Even though they're still getting to know each other, he knows in his heart that she's the one for him.
Her vibe, her energy, everything about Tiana just drew him in more something he didn't feel with Kehlani when they were together.
"I got something planned out for that." Jey said as Bianca furrowed her eyebrows a bit.
"What's the plan? Ion mind helping like honestly you're a good man better than Kai." She said.
Before I could tell her the plan, we saw Tiana coming downstairs. She looked stunning in her dress, with her hair done and her makeup done.
Jey licked his lips as he stood up, keeping his eyes on her as she walked in the living room.
"you ready to go mama?" He asked as he held his hand out.
"Yep, let's go before we are late Josh." Tiana said softly.
They interlocked their hands as they headed out towards the car. Jey told Bianca that he'd tell her the details later about his plan.
They finally made it to the restaurant, which looked really nice and fancy. She and Jey got out of the car, holding hands as they both walked inside.
As they were heading towards their tables, Tiana saw unfamiliar faces sitting at the table, and the two people looked at them with a smile.
"Yoooo Uce what's hannin dawg." Jimmy said as he dabbed up his twin brother.
Tiana stood there like a lost puppy as she watched Josh greeting his people. That's when they all turned to her, and she looked back at them.
"Jon, Trin, this is my girlfriend Tiana, and Tiana, this is my sister-in-law Trin, and my twin brother Jonathan; people close to us call him Jimmy." Jey spoke as Tiana hugged Trinity and Jon.
"Omg Jey, you didn't tell me that she was going to be pretty." Trinity said as Tiana blushed at her compliment.
"Yeah uce, where did y'all meet at?"
Tiana and Jey looked at each other while cheesing really hard.
After dinner, they all went to Jey's house to chill and smoke some weed while jamming to some music. As they were doing that, Tiana and Trinity were out back in the pool together, getting to know each other.
"so how did you meet Jey girl give me all the details." Trinity asked.
"Well, I wanted to get this tattoo covered up that I had when I was with my ex-boyfriend at the time, and my bestie Bianca hooked me up to Josh's tattoo shop, and we instantly connected there," Tiana said as she passed the blunt to Trin.
"Joshua is a good man; you ain't gotta worry." She said.
Tiana smiled at Trinity as they continued to speak to each other, "But fair warning: Joshua is a hornball girl, so you better run."
"Oh girl tell me about it, he be all over me." Tiana said.
"Girl, once you all are married, it's going to get worse. Hell, look how my husband is acting." Tiana chuckled at Trinity while darting her eyes towards Jey.
He was talking to his brother when he looked in her direction. He smiled at her before going back to talking to Jon.
"Jey had told me what happened with your ex-boyfriend and Kehlani hoe ass." Trinity said.
"Yeah, he told me about his ex as well; in person, she doesn't look pretty, " she replied, and Trinity nodded her head in agreement.
"Yeah, I was so surprised when I saw you because, oh my god, you're literally gorgeous."
Tiana pushed Trin while blushing like crazy, "Stop, Trinity."
✧.* TIANA Everyone was on cloud nine as they watched a movie together. Jey and I were cuddling on the couch while Jon and Trin were doing the same on a different couch.
We were watching the new bad boy movie that had come out; it was a lot of ass whooping and shooting in this moving.
I felt Jey move away from me as he got up. It looked like he had to go use the restroom, so it really didn't bother me as much.
Meanwhile, I felt my phone buzz as I saw that Bianca had texted me and Jey.
Breezy: heyyy bestie how's it going over there I heard you meet your boyfriend's brother and his wife. Tiana: he's not my boyfriend yet until he ask me to be his girlfriend B. Breezy: yeah, yeah, whatever girl.💁🏽‍♀️ Tiana: but his brother is honestly funny and Trin she's so sweet. Breezy: really? Omg I would love to meet her. Tiana: I can ask if they aren't busy ion know how long they'll be in town. Breezy: ight cool well I was just checking in girl. Tiana: kk girl . 🫶🏽
ZaddyJey🤍 sent a two attachment.
When I opened the message that Jey had sent me an attachment of something, I opened it only to see what it and my mouth went wide open as I saw him holding his pretty long brown eight-inch dick on my screen.
I saw the bubbles moving, so I knew he meant business with this, but his brother and sister-in-law are here. Wouldn't that be weird?
But when I looked up at them, they were too occupied with the movie, which was turned up to max volume, so I guess it really didn't matter.
That's when I felt my phone buzz again with a message from Jey.
ZaddyJey🤍: lemme' holla at you mamas ZaddyJey🤍: lemme' rearrange them guts lookin' all good like that today.
I darted my attention towards Jon and Trin, making sure that they were indeed watching the movie, and they were, as I got up from the couch and went upstairs to the bathroom.
The bathroom light was on, and I knew that Jey was waiting for me to come in, so I knocked on the door, waiting for him to open it.
As soon as he did, he snatched my ass right the fuck up and got to work.
SMUT WARNING Jey had me on the countertop of the sink with my legs over his shoulders and my arms wrapped around his neck as he was giving me deep strokes.
Both of our skins were slapping against each other as our moans and groans echoed the bathroom, he was pounding my pussy good making me throw my head back.
"Shit Josh..." I moaned.
"Mhmm...mama got some good ass pussy." He grunted as he moved his hips faster.
I could feel him giving me every single inch that he wanted me to feel as I tucked my bottom lip in under my teeth while maintaining eye contact with him I knew how much he loved that.
I never knew I could be so attached to this man. The way he protects me and loves on me, especially claiming me as his in front of his brother and sister-in-law, meant something to me.
He kept his pace up while going deeper inside of me, making me see stars as my mouth parted. That's when he lifted me up and started ramming my shit.
"Fucckkkk J-Josh!" I cried out while holding onto him tightly.
"take this shit princess, take it." My mind felt foggy after he said that I wasn't expecting him to do all that to me, now giving me a good spank on my left thigh.
I kept rolling my eyes in the back of my head, keeping them closed due to the pleasure that I was feeling at the moment. It was like he was digging them inside of me, breaking me up little by little.
I felt his balls hittin' my clit, driving me insane as he placed his lips on mine as we made out during this.
His tongue was all in my mouth as my hands were pulling on his mullet as his thrust were getting deeper and deeper into me, making me feel like I couldn't take it any more.
"I-I C-can't T-take I-it J-Josh..." I breathe out while trying to keep up.
He didn't even listen to me as he thrust harder than before, making me gasp while moaning very loudly as our skins were slapping against each other, making the bathroom echo.
I dig my nails into his skin as he hissed in pain, tucking his bottom lip under his teeth while gazing down at me.
I felt a familiar pit go down in my stomach as I knew that I was going to cream on this man. I think he knew, too, seeing my facial expression.
He was hitting my g-spot while I was pulling on his mullet as he was talking to me through it, "you finna cum? go ahead, make a mess on me, mama daddy got'chu." Jey knew he was a sweet talker.
As he kept hitting my spot I couldn't even let my mind process the way he was fucking me so deeply I didn't know I had this affect on him.
"This my pussy baby? tell me this is my pussy." I couldn't even get the words outta my mouth as I'm being folded like a damn pretzel.
"Tell me baby."
"Y-yess daddy this your pussy it's belongs to you! Fuck I'm finna cum dadddy!" I whined as I creamed on his dick feeling my legs shaking.
I wanted to get off of him so badly, but he held onto me tight while pinning my back onto the wall, thrusting into me deeply, making me feel everything.
"Don't run, take this fucking dick." Jey hissed as he held onto my thighs for support.
"F-fuccck!" I felt very overwhelmed with this as I began to feel tears coming down my face.
Jey kissed my cheeks and then my lips, trying to calm me down while his movements kept getting sloppier and sloppier.
As they were getting sloppier, I was on cloud nine right now, pulling on his mullet because I wanted him to be closer to me.
I hugged his sweaty body tightly as I felt him breathing down my neck, giving it a few wet kisses while I was moaning his name in his ear.
His dick was twitching inside of me knowing that he was finna bust, without even thinking I wrapped my legs around his torso as he thrusted into me vigorously.
"Fuck mama, I'm finna nut all in this pussy." Jey groaned as he was giving it his all.
Lucky for me I was on birth control so this wouldn't bother me at all.
"Shit Josh I'm finna cum again...fuck.." I whimpered as he kissed me on the cheek.
"Wait on me mama, let's nut together."
After a few more thrusts he had left in him, Jey placed his face underneath my neck while cursing under his breath as me and him cum together on the spot filling me up like a Twinkie.
SMUT OVER.
We stayed in that position for a minute to catch our breaths as our chests were going up and down deeply, looking at one another's features.
He kissed me on the lips while carrying us to his bedroom, 'how is this man not tired like me? nigga got me all workout.'
Praying that Jon and Trinity didn't hear us fucking upstairs in the bathroom. Knowing how Jon is, he'll say something, and it'll be so embarrassing.
Jey wrapped the covers around us, and I snuggled up in his chest, looking up at him as he gazed his eyes down at me. "I love you, mama."
I was taken aback when he said that it actually made my heart feel warm, as I looked down, not trying to be emotional around him.
He grabbed my chin with his hands, making me look up at him again.
"I mean it, Tiana. I love the fuck outta' you, girl. It's just sum' about you that makes my heart melt." Jey confessed as he noticed tears appearing in my eyes.
"I love you too, Josh. I fell in love with you the moment we met at your tattoo shop," I said as I wiped the tears from my eyes.
Hearing him say them three words meant something to me; he kissed me on the lips softly while I snuggled into him more.
We both drifted to sleep.
Under Your Touch.
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theyhatelani replied to your story: her pussy can't be better than mines Jey. Yk where home is at baby.
biancabelairwwe replied to your story: please take care of her Joshua she is just one precious soul.
Jonathanfatu replied to your story: ngl yall was very loud asf up there Uce. 😭😭
zillafatu replied to your story: when is yall goin' to come down here with the rest of the fam cuzzo.
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uceyjucey, zillafatu, theyhatelani, and 99,000 people liked your post.
tianasworld: my happy home. 🧘🏽‍♀️🤍 uceyjucey: 🥰🫶🏽 tianasworld: @ uceyjucey 🤍 zillafatu: can't wait to meet you fasho biancabelairwwe: omggg my bestie is finally happy again. 🥹🥹 tianasworld: @ biancabelairwwe 🥹 theyhatelani: whatever he'll come back home to me. tianasworld: @ theyhatelani girl please move around he's in a better position with me than he was with you honey. uceyjucey: @ theyhatelani get outta my girl's comments with allat negative bs. 🙄 shelovekai: this is some bs bro that can't be your happy home.
Read all 100,290 comments.
A/N: JEY DID IT YALL HE IS NOW A CHAMPION LIKE I AM SO HAPPY FOR HIM HONESTLY HE REALLY DOES DESERVE IT FR BRO.
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But I hope yall enjoy this chapter lmk in the comments.
STAY UCEY.
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omophagic-beast · 1 year ago
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What is your Hogwarts house?
Hi! Im gonna assume this is in good faith once, and answer this by saying that im a trans man and have fully disconnected from harry potter because theyre bad books and jk rowling sucks if youd like to read something better id love to recommend some stuff! The Legend of Eli Monpress by Rachel Aaron is a series I like enough to put a quote from it on my arm, though I still hesitate to call it my favorite. It's about the greatest thief in the world as he tries to get his bounty as high as possible, accompanied by a swordsman wielding a mountain and a woman hosting the seed of a demon. The Keys to the Kingdom series by Garth Nyx was recommended to me by the lovely Jay Dragon and a few others at Metatopia this year, and I ended up devouring four of the seven books on the plane ride home. A child unwillingly goes through The Horrors, fighting seven angels who have been overtaken (in a sense) by the seven deadly sins. There's so much cool and interesting symbology throughout the series that's really fun to pick out when you notice it. Delicious in Dungeon is a manga by Ryoko Kui and definitely my favorite manga of all time. It's mainly about the importance of good food, as a group of adventurers end up having to traverse a dungeon with no supplies, surviving by eating the monsters within.
The Seep by Chana Porter is fun, if you're willing to get weird with it. Trina Goldberg-Oneka, a trans woman, finds herself devastated and unmoored after her wife leaves her to become a baby again. And by "fun" I mean it's a book that left me feeling like I was more of a person than I was before.
There's also plenty of really good webcomics out there, like Sakana, Bicycle Boy, Pia and The Tiny Little Things, A Better Place, We Go Together, Barbarous, Cold Sweat, ect, that you can simply find and read for free online! And if you simply must have wizards may I suggest making your own, the blog There's a TTRPG for that has a great post listing a bunch of good ttrpgs with that theme: https://theresattrpgforthat.tumblr.com/post/718030523649376256/theme-magic-and-mystics And speaking of games I'll cap this all off, for no particular reason, by recommending the game Let's Rob RJ McElhenny and Steal Her Golden Quill by Glaive Guisarme Games. It's fun and campy and a really good time.
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the-fiction-witch · 1 year ago
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Bump P2
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Media The Artful Dodger
Character Jack Dawkins
Couple Jack X Reader
Rating Adorable + DARK
Requested:  Hello Fiction witch, the new jack Dawkins imagine "Bump" is really good I think some others agree with me that if you could make another one....pleasseeee You are a really good writer and it makes people feel better, warm, and fuzzy. Thank you ❤️ omg I love that It was beautiful, I beg for an equally sweet part 2. It makes me feel all lovely and warm inside your such a good writer, I love all your work. thank you so much for writing these. I love it can you make part two when the baby comes Please Part 2 please 🥺🥺🙏🙏
Warnings: Labour! very very intense descriptions of a very difficult Labour/ Blood / medical tools / improper use of medical equipment / surgery / 1800's doctoring (Which I feel is a category all it's own) / And many other Dark elements!
I pushed my body up hearing my back crack as I stretched, given my body had been shoved into the absolute minimum of the bed. But I didn't want to complain I know she hadn't done it on purpose but she was tired and sore, and just wanted the space in the bed to stretch herself out. 
I rubbed my face a little and grabbed my watch from the side, I needed to get going. I forced myself to get up but I couldn't move as a hand gripped my shirt. I chuckled and Turned seeing her not even awake enough to open her little eyes.
"Don't Go, Jack." She pleaded barely awake, 
"I have to, I have surgery today." I reminded her "I'll be back before you know it," I told her as I stroked her cheek and kissed her closed eyelids and then the tip of her nose. 
She let my shirt go, so I climbed out of bed and got dressed for the day all with her laid sleepily watching me, she stroked her bump almost invitingly like she was trying to make the bed with her and baby look as inviting as possible. 
Which I have to admit was working. 
"I'll be back as soon as Surgery's done," I told her as I headed back to bed as I did up my waistcoat, I knelt my knee on the sheets and kissed her sweet lips "I promise."
"Okay..." She smiled. 
"Take care of little one for me," I told her kissing her bump, 
"I will, Have a nice day Jack." She Yawned almost drifting off to sleep as she said it.
"You too, Love you" I smiled, but before I had even got to the door I heard her little wheezes as she nodded off to sleep again, I chuckled a little "Sleepy Mummy, Well Daddies off to work." I cooed I gave her bump one more kiss before heading downstairs, grabbing some toast from the kitchen, "Elis?"
"Yes, Doctor Dawkins!" She jumped as she came back in from pegging the laundry out,
"Keep an eye on her for me?"
"Course Sir," She nodded. 
I took my toast and my bag, left the house and headed off to the hospital in the dim morning light, but the moment I got there chaos ensued. Not sure why it surprised me as Chaos almost always did occur. 
There had been a bar fight with some group of sailors arguing with another group and before anyone knew where they were we had a hospital full of black eyes, broken noses, and god only knows what kinda damage. Sneed was pouting as usual barely actually helping at all, and Prof was drunk off his arse held up in his office to keep him from causing even more problems. I rushed around like a man possessed every time I glanced at the clock the day had disappeared some more. In the few free moments, my mind had as I wrapped bandages and went from place to place I thought of y/n. Of course, I did.
I hoped she was keeping herself well, even if every day I left her I was fearful given the state of her pregnancy, the baby would be along any day now and her stomach had even dropped so I knew it wouldn't be long. 
By the time I actually got to surgery, you know the ONE thing I was coming into work to do today! was finally set up and organized I was already tired, so I just wanted to get this over and done with so I could head home and crawl into bed. 
But... Things became difficult quickly, I hate when Surgery doesn't go to plan. And Just as it got worse the doors opened.
"Alright, The Surgeon is here!" Prof slurred as he came though still not sobered up,
"Sir I-"
"Dawkins, Leave this in the hands of the professional,"
"....Yes sir." I sighed moving away and handing him the knife, I didn't want to but I knew if I didn't he'd call me insulant and I'd be out of a job. I moved back but still did my best to direct him in the right way given he could barely even hold the blade straight "Sir? SIR!" I had to bolt across the table, pushed him out of the way and try to fix his drunken mistake, I rushed around as quickly as I could to try and fix this and keep him alive, I managed to stabilize him and get him half sewn up before he gave up from shock- "Fuck-" I sighed throwing my knife on the table running a hand through my hair tried to clean the tone of blood on my hands. 
I was angry, frustrated, exhausted, but... at least it's over.
"Dr Dawkins?" A voice spoke up,
Ohh god no what now! I turned on my heels and immediately panicked.
"Elis?"
"I-It's-" she began nervously blood across her hands and apron, 
"Y/n?!" I yelled and she nodded,
 I didn't even hesitate, Grabbed my bag and my tools matching out like I was on Military order, 
"Dawkins? Where do you think you going?" Sneed cornered me in the main entrance hall, and he forced me to stop and blocked my exit with his smug grin, his arms behind his back as he leant forward he does in that arrogant way so he could talk down to me like I was a child, "You still have patients to see to on the ward." 
I wanted to deck him for preventing my leaving, but I did my best to be elegant "Dr Sneed, With all due respect, I have been working since four O'clock this morning, I have seen every one of MY patients on that ward, So I'm asking you if you'd wind awfully sodding off out of my bloody way."
"Get back on that ward. Or I'll have you thrown there."
"My wife. is in labour. MOVE!" 
"You mean your whore?" He smirked 
I didn't hesitate I decked him as hard as I could and left, I didn't care what trouble I'd be in I wasn't going to allow him to keep me there. Elis Took my things and I bolted home as fast as I possibly could, my body tried, beyond exhausted but fueled by the pure need to see her. 
I pushed open the door as it had been left unlocked and bolted up to the bedroom.
I could hear her screams before I even opened the door. 
Everything was the same as I left it, but the fire was smothered by the pile of tissues, rags and such like. The metallic twang of blood in the air was so much you could almost taste it. And the most horrific sight that could be imagined. 
Y/n lay on her back in the bed, her body twisting, and squirming, her nightie around her hips, the white cotton flooded heavy with her blood, the bedsheets coated with it almost directly from her as if some hellish blood-soaked monster had crawled out of her, A damp rag beside her that Elis had clearly made up with lavender to soak on her head but it was a little late for that. Her head would throw back as she screamed. I found the sound... so utterly chilling that I froze up. 
It took me two years to grow accustomed to the sight of blood without growing wozy, even longer to feel comfortable, cutting limbs, and organs apart. But still, even now, the screaming is a sound that rattles my bones. It's a sound no doctor can unhear, the sound of unrelenting pain. I found Labor screaming was always the worst, as it is endless and unforgiving, and there is so little you can do as a doctor to help other than hold their hand and let them suffer. 
Even worse so... Given, That's Y/n. My Y/n. 
I had never heard her scream with such agony in her voice. Tears streaming down her face. Her body contorted as it had no other outfit for this level of pain. 
I forced myself out of my state and rushed to her side holding her hand "I'm here! I'm here! You're gonna be okay." I muttered half to myself if I'm honest, quickly checking her over to see what state she was in "Alright, Yep this is... definitely labour."
"Thank you, Jack, I hadn't figured that OUT!" She yelled 
"Contractuions when did they start?"
"About six this morning" She whined
"Six! this morning! and only NOW did someone TELL ME!" 
"You were busy," She said, 
"How bad were they at six?"
"Small, got worse. and worse and now where - AHHHHHYHHHHHH!" She screamed as another contraction ripped through her, 
"Okay... just let me know when the next one is?" I told her as I opened my watch and counted the seconds between her contractions "Oooohhhh okay! That is uhhh" I nodded, I quickly moved to the end of the bed holding her nightie "Is it uhh it okay if I?"
"Go for it, You put the damn thing in there,"
I couldn't help but chuckle at her sarcastic tone even though her contractions, and I checked how dilated she was, and... uhhh she wasn't. "Uhhhhh..."
"Uhh? I don't like Uhh Jack!" She snapped,
"You're not dilated... You've been having early labour contractions for a minimum of twelve hours why the bloody hell are you not dilated?" I asked as I tried very hard not to panic, 
"I don't know! ASK MY VARGINA!" She screamed 
Finally, Elis arrived with my tools so I could get to work making sure things went as smoothly as they could do but the blood was still troubling me, Until I realized 
"Then what's all the- Oh no,"
"You know you have a terrible bedside manner doctor. oddly enough, Oh no! is not something a pregnant lady wants to hear!"
"The blood is your mucus Plug."
"My what!"
"Muscas plug the... Plug, the stopper in the sink that is your womb, it's out, that's all the blood, which means... it's broken." I explained, "How long ago did you start bleeding?"
"Not long ago, I saw blood and told Elis to get you." 
"If you're not dilated then baby is going to try and force its way out of you... as it is. without your hips being wide enough for the head."
"English!"
"Meaning... either it's going to tear you apart... Or it's head is going to get stuck."
"OHhh fan FUCKING tastic!" 
"I can give you an injection, it might make it hurt more but it should force your body to realize there's a baby trying to get out of it and uhh open the doors as it were." I explained quickly giving her it but it only made her scream louder "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry." I muttered knowing what I was doing to her, and understanding the horrific pain I was putting her through but I held her hand every second I didn't need it, even if admittedly my hand was numb and her nails had drawn blood at some points. 
"Jack... I'm scared." Her voice was weak, tearful, as if on the brink of death,
"You're going to be okay. I promise you. I know it hurts. I know it's scary. but this.. this is everything you have ever been made to do, your body is made for this, and all of it will be worth it when you hold our baby in your arms," I told her giving her a sweet kiss,
"It's not made to do it comfortably..." She cried "Jack... Please I don't wanna die."
"You're not going to die," I told her almost ordering her as if I was willing her, to force her to stay alive. "I promise it's going to be okay" I told her trying to make sure things moved as they should "I know its hard, this is your first it's not going to be easy, Baby number three, four and five will just glide on out" I joked but the look on her face... that was a badly timed joke. 
"I am never. letting you sleep with me again!" She screamed, She's just kidding... I hope. 
 "Think about it, you have an advantage over most ladies,"
"And what's that?"
"You married a doctor" I winked "Okay, there we go your dilating now. it shouldn't be too long but as soon as that baby starts moving we are going to have to act fast,"
"It's already moving."
"What?"
She grabbed my shirt "I can feel it moving. like a snake under my skin. this baby is coming!" She yelled in my face 
"Your water hasn't broken yet it can't be- and it should have especially if your mucus plug is gone the water has no protection it would burst on your cervix at least," I told her trying to keep her calm, but she was right, this baby was coming, she wasn't dilated enough yet, and the water hadn't broke. I Knew every second risked our baby and Y/n... I knew the other option. And so did she. 
"Jack. Get. It. Out. of. Me."
"Y/n I can't-"
"You're a surgeon. if anyone can you can." 
"Y/n I can't."
"Jack... Please. I love you. I trust you more than anyone. Please... Make it stop." 
"No woman has ever survived a Ceaseron section. The shock alone would will you. if it doesn't me moving your organs around will. Or the blood loss. or me cutting through something important. Or infection!" I explained "...You can't ask me, you cut you open knowing I'll kill you."
"Even if it saves the baby?" She cried, 
"Do not make me choose between you," I begged her,
"Then I'll decide." She snapped "Save him Jack. Please."
"You cannot ask this of me-" I cried 
"Please... Or both of us will die." 
"...will you give me time? one hour. If I can't feel the baby's head by then... I'll do it. Will you Give me one hour!?" 
"One. But I don't know how much more I can take." 
I kissed her with as much love and passion as I could before I got what I needed from my bag, the tool wasn't meant for this, but... rumour had spiralled that it could be used for such things, I had never tested to know for sure... I didn't imagine I'd be testing on my own wife.  
"This... is gonna hurt," I told her and she nodded so I did my best to be careful holding her leg to comfort her as I needed them close by and her hand was too far, as I used the tool as gently as I could, to forceably break her water. 
The moment I did fluid began to replace blood, and her screams intensified but her body almost knew now what it had to do. Her body knew it had no choice. and was fueled by the natural female power to bring life into the world. 
"Perfect. Perfect. you're doing so good." I told her holding her hand in both of mine even if we were both coated in blood, I walked her through her breathing and soon enough she needed to really push, so I directed her as best I could through her tired screams and tears, I did TRY and help her breath... honestly I also forgot at times. 
Soon enough it became time, I called Eli in as a standby nurse, and I made sure to open Y/n's legs as much as possible, "Comfy? Or do you want another position?"
"He went in like that. He can come out like that" She joked between her gasps 
"Okay... be ready, this all happens a bit fast," I told Elis and she nodded so I turned to Y/n "Y/n... I am, so so sorry for what is about to happen to you. I am going to be honest with you, this is going to be .... the worst pain of your whole life But I will do what I can to make it as quick and painless as possible, I'm here and I love you." I told her giving her a sweet kiss and stroking her cheek "And Nothing bad is going to happen to you. I promise." I told her before I checked her again and it was time, "You're favourite memory, take yourself there now." I told her just as it began. 
Her screams blood-curdling, her body trying to fight itself, tears streaming down her cheeks, that sound, that image, would haunt my nightmares. 
And... I may be a surgeon, But still. 
Nothing quite prepares you for the sight of your wife... as your child's head leaves her body slowly stretching the skin as it forces its way out. 
I walked her through her slow breaths making sure she didn't push and rip everything apart, until finally he was out, and quickly I made Elis pick him up and wrap him warmly. and by some luck almost immediately she delivered her placenta almost as if it was literally pushed behind him, 
"It's done. It's done it's over. it's all over." I told her unable to control my tears as I gave her kisses "It's all over, you did so brilliantly my darling," I smiled making sure the cord was cut and she was set to begin to heal,
"It's over?" she asked understandably very weak,
"It's over. It's all over. you just rest" I cooed "Get your breath back and relax."
"What is it?" She gasped
"A boy Ma'am" Elis Said 
"A boy, we have a little boy" I smiled almost in disbelief unable to stop kissing her "I am... So immensely proud of you, I didn't think I could love you anymore but you have proven me wrong."
"Uhh Doctor..." Elis Spoke up and there was fear in her voice, 
I quickly moved and she handed him to me as he was wrapped up tight in his blanket.
Not moving. Not breathing. 
I did my best not to panic I didn't want to alarm y/n, but panic rushed through me, tears streaming down my face.
"No, No, please... Please, come on little guy, come on, please, Please, Wake up. Wake up. Come on little guy please." I muttered trying everything I could in utter desperation "Please.... Please....Please..." I begged 
and by the grace of god! 
He coughed spluttered and began to cry wiggling his little arms.
I felt, so unexplainable. 
I was proud, joyful, nervous, fearful, on the verge of both passing out, and of tears.
For a moment I held him in my arms by the fire, cradling him in his blanket as he cried freshly meeting the world, and it was as if He and I. Had a moment. Where we are all that exists. 
My son, My sweet beautiful son. 
"Is he okay?" Y/n woke me from this trance having managed to sit up now, she was clearly exhausted I'm sure I'll never be able to comprehend such exhaustion, but with her sly wicked smile almost... Jealous, but joyous all the same. 
I went over being as careful as I could sitting on the bed with her and handing him over to her. 
Her face was an utter picture, she glowed with a sweetness I had only seen briefly, her smile so wide, as she held our baby to her chest, he rested on her bare skin and almost went to sleep so content to be in the arms of his mother. 
"He's perfect."
"Ummm," she smiled pulling me closer so I could cuddle her as she cuddled him her head on my shoulder 
"So, how was labour?"
"Ummm what labour," she giggled 
I smiled and kissed her head "I don't think I've ever been so happy."
"Me either Jack" she smiled "You think of a name?"
"I can choose!?" 
"Mhm, Our first little boy, you can choose."
Honestly, I hadn't much thought about it, I ran through names in my mind trying to think of something that had meaning, but dignity, but found very little. But... I thought of one name. And I knew it had to be him.
"Sebastian." 
"Sebastian," She smiled "It's lovely, Why?"
"... Captain Sebastian Grimm, He's the one who got me out of prison. took me away on a ship. Liked my quick fingers, made me... what I am. I'd still be rotting in a cell if it wasn't for him. Without him... I'd have never even met you." 
She smiled and kissed my cheek "Then it's settled. Sebastian Dawkins." 
"Sebastian Dawkins," I smiled playing with his little fingers and kissing his sweet head. 
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muneca-lemon-steppa · 1 year ago
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Interviews for New Beginnings: Part 5
Alfie Solomons x Fem!Reader, Word Count: 5.6K
Warnings: Cursing
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A/N: Oh my word guys!!! I'm so sorry this took so long but I was truly so stuck for some reason!! Anyway as always, I'm having so much fun with you guys. Idk why it sometimes feels like we're at a sleepover, anyone else? Also thank you so much to everyone who is sending in requests, I promise I'll get to them!! Have an amazing day, sending all my love!! - Mo
You could have killed him. You really could have. Truly. Truly you could have.
The ‘small apartment’ Alfie described was in fact a gorgeous row house about a block away from his own home, and two blocks away from the office. It had a beautiful garden in the back, with a dark red oak door in the front. Three stories. With enough room for each couple to have their own room, and Eli could finally have his own room instead of sleeping on the floor in the parlor. The home came fully furnished, and Alfie made sure that previous customers knew where to find your father and uncle, so the business could continue while the shop was being repaired.
And if he couldn’t have been more incorrigible, “someone” had “donated” three new dolls for Esther, which were perfectly placed on her new bed in the room you and her would share.
As your family walked around in awe of the rich space, you hung back, tight lipped. It was far too much. It was an enormous expense. And he acted as if he had nothing to do with it and it was nothing. You really could kill him.
“Alfie… how much does this cost you?”, you murmur to him, refusing to look at him.
“That’s none of your concern sweet heart.”
“It absolutely is. I balance the book.”
“And I correct your math.”
“Alfie this is far too-“
“It is exactly what is needed. I’m not about to argue with you in front of your parents.”
“We’ll never be able to repay you Alfie. It isn’t fair to you.”
“Woman the agreement is already made and it was a good agreement. Now I have someone who will fix my shirts since you refuse to.”
“Because I’m your secretary not your wife.”
Alfie scoffed and rolled his eyes, “You’re the source for every new ulcer, that’s what you are. Secretary is supposed to make my life better and she makes my life a living hell.”
You couldn’t help but smile. You let your eyes wander to him, to see that he was already staring at you, “What?”
He taps his cane against your ankle, “You like it?”
You nod, pressing your lips together. The cane touching your ankle and his body coming closer making your neck hot.
Alfie knew that he shouldn’t get closer. But your family was upstairs, no one would be a witness. He needed to be closer. You were barely whispering. He needed to get closer to you, “My house isn’t far. I’ll always be able to come. If you need me.”
“You said you would have someone outside every night.”
“They ain’t as good as me though yeah?”
“No.”
Your eyes needed to break from his gaze. It was becoming so warm in the house. His knuckles press your chin to look up at him, “I’ll always come. Understand?”
You nod again, unable to look away from his deep blue eyes, “Yes Alfie.”
The silence envelops you, and you feel something is about to be confessed, when Esther comes charging through, “Sissy! Sissy! Look at my new dollys! Mr. Solomons got me new dollys!”
She jumped into your arms, so ecstatic about her new treasures. They were beautiful, with silky hair and darling cotton dresses. She couldn’t have yearned for anything finer, “They are lovely my sweet girl! Have you thanked Mr. Solomons for the presents?”
Esther, ever the little spitfire, threw herself from your arms and into Alfie’s, causing him to drop the cane in the process to catch her, “Thank you Mr. Solomons! I really love them!”
Alfie thankfully got his footing right, boosting Esther more on his good hip, “Hush now chicken it had nothing to do with me! But I’m happy you like them. They’ll have a riot with you yeah?”
She nodded ferociously, “Mr. Solomons will you stay for our tea party?”
Your face flushed with slight embarrassment, Alfie Solomons has probably never been asked to a tea party in his life. Much less an Esther tea party. Which involved lengthy backstories and horridly torrid affairs for each doll. A party could last a whole afternoon. But Alfie Solomons merely chuckled, patting down the soft curls on Esther’s head, “Well chicken while that sounds absolutely lovely yeah, I unfortunately cannot make it today. You will have to let your guests know, and give them my apologies.”
Esther pouted, “Why not?”
He began to explain when you heard your mother call out, “Mr. Solomons! I hope you are not leaving already!”
You shut your eyes, hoping that this was a bad dream that you were going to wake up from soon. Up until this morning, you had managed to keep your life with Alfie and your life with your family separate. Both lovely and warm but incompatible in your mind. Your mother could not be seriously about to ask him to stay.
Alfie slowly set Esther down, mussing her short hair, “I’m afraid I must Mrs. Abraham. There’s business I must attend to and I don’t want to overstay.”
Your mother merely grabbed a hold of your father’s arm, “Mr. Solomons you have not eaten yet! It’s late afternoon and you must be exhausted as we are. Please let us make something, nothing too fancy but you should sit and let us make lunch for everyone.”
“Now really Mrs. Abraham I-“
“Mr. Solomons I know you are a big man but I really cannot let you leave without a meal. Now please sit down at this beautiful table you have gifted us and let us make you lunch.”
It was in that moment that Alfie noticed that you and your mother got the same look in your eyes when determined. The corner of your lip crooked the same. You surely didn’t notice, and Alfie would never tell you, but it was as though Alfie saw an image of you 20 years from now. Alfie smiled, “Alright alright if you insist. Mr. Abraham I hope I’m not inconveniencing yeah?”
Your father shook his head, “Not at all Mr. Solomons. Please, let’s get acquainted with this table together.”
Your mother said a simple lunch. But it turned into a whole affair. Alfie also failed to mention that the kitchen was stocked enough for a whole week. Your mother went above and beyond with you and your aunt and grandmother to make one of the most healing meals you had ever had. Roasted chicken and vegetables. Hot bread. Strong tea. You had even made a fresh apple tart for dessert, which Alfie helped himself to three slices.
You had never imagined this happening. But yet it was. Alfie was at your family’s dinner table. Laughing. Telling stories. Listening to others. Serving your grandmother and grandfather. If there wasn’t the base lie of you being under his employ, this would have felt so natural. Your mother sat him next to you, and your mind went miles and miles ahead. What it would be like if there wasn’t the lie there. If Alfie was there not as an employer but as a regular man. As someone who was sweet on you and wanting to be a part of this family. You yearned to reach your hand to his under the table, weaving your fingers together and feeling the callouses and scars of his knuckles.
Little did you know, Alfie’s thoughts were parallel to yours. You never noticed, but his eyes never left you. Watching the way you teased your family, doted on Esther, argued with Eli, laughing in that way that shook the walls. It made his heart race just watching you, seeing you be so free.
As the lunch turned into dinner and turned into evening, your father then asked, “Dearest, how far is your office from here do you think? Do you and Eli need to see what the walk will look like?”
Before you could answer, Alfie saved you from stammering, “Mr. Abraham, her boss is actually located right next to my bakery. If you’d permit me, I’d be happy to walk her to work and back. Just to make sure she’s safe?”
Your mother perked up,”oh would you Mr. Solomons? I hate to see her walking alone down the street.”
You raised your eyes at your mother, “Mama! Please I can walk myself to work!”
Your mother raised her hands, “This is a new neighborhood and you don’t know the way! Why would you dispose of a blessing??”
“Mama Mr. Solomons is very busy he does not need to trouble himself with me.”
You and your mother proceeded to volley back and forth. A common occurrence between you two, which no one cared to come between. It wasn’t until Alfie put his hand between the two of you that you settled, “Now now please Miss Abraham, your mother is quite right. It’s a new part of Camden for you, and you just experienced a terrible accident. I will not push it eh, you can make your own decision. But it will not be a trouble at all for me. And I’m sure your boss will be very invested in making sure that his nice secretary makes it to and from the office safely yeah?”
Alfie tried to hide his smirk as your nostrils flared, a habit that he noticed during one of your first arguments with him. He loved it almost as much as he loved your laughter. You finally relented after 3 beats, “If you believe it is best Mama, yes Mr. Solomons… I would be grateful for an escort to work.”
Alfie clapped his hands together, “Lovely. I will be here promptly at 7:30 tomorrow morning. Mr and Mrs Abraham, this was an absolute treat. I don’t think I’ve ever eaten so well. Ishmael will be downstairs keeping watch over the gate tonight. Shalom everyone, sleep well!”
Everyone gave their goodbyes, until your mother spoke up, “Dear please walk Mr. Solomons to the gate.”
You gave your mother a look, which she quickly reciprocated with more fervor. Inhaling deep you acquiesce, walking Alfie out to the gate, as if he would ever get lost.
Alfie chuckled as you opened the gate, “Thank you very much sweetie, I would never have found my way out.”
“I am so sorry for their behavior Mr. Solomons. I promise you will never have to endure that again.”
“Oh yes because I would never want to endure that again. A hot meal. People surrounding me that don’t want to kill me.”
“An impromptu tea party?”
“It was lovely actually. Esther is a very gracious hostess, you could take some tips.”
You couldn’t help but laugh, “oh I’m sure I could.”
You find that your eyes meet more and more now. And nothing makes you want to look away. You feel the bite of the cold wind on your shoulder, and you become keenly aware of the cold metal of the gate your rest your hand on. Alfie presses his lips together, and puts his hand on top of yours, rubbing his thumb over your knuckles. You barely hear the gravely murmur, “Get inside little viper. You’ll catch cold”
“I’m not cold.”
“Well your mother will worry.”
“It’s fine.”
He chuckles, “God you’re difficult…Shalom sweet heart. I’ll be here tomorrow.”
You nod, “Shalom Alfie.”
Your hand drags away from his, as you walk backwards back into the home. His eyes never leave your form until you cross the threshold.
As you lay in bed that night, all you can think about are those dark blue eyes. Those full lips shrouded by a coarse and wild beard. Those rough hands against yours. Your mind replayed the feeling of his hands on yours, memorizing the tough callouses and tender touch of his fingers. You told yourself that you couldn’t let your mind go and explore those secret desires. Those secret desires where he wouldn’t just touch your fingers. He’d hold your hand, letting everyone know that you were his. Those imaginings where he wasn’t just your boss, but yours and yours alone. Any moment you weren’t with him, you missed him. You wish that he could stay. Stay for the night. Stay for the morning. That you wouldn’t just give tea at his desk but at his breakfast table. Where he wouldn’t just let his hand hover over your jaw, but caress it. Where you could finally feel that god awful beard on your cheek. Your heart ached terribly. Wishing and wishing that it could be that way. That you could have him. And that he could have you. You tossed and turned, watching the moon make its way across the sky from the window in your room. Your hands clasped by your heart, still feeling the tingle of where his hands were.
Alfie in fact made it to the house at 7:15 the next morning. He emphasized that it was because he just wanted to make sure you weren’t left waiting, but he looked all too smug and comfortable drinking tea with your grandmother, having some of the fresh jam she had made just that morning.
As soon as you were out of window view of your house, you felt like you could finally breathe and speak freely. You were worried to a certain extent that Alfie would treat the relationship you had differently. As if you were some sort of charity case, or if you were a helpless bird needing attending to. But those fears were unnecessary, as Alfie jumped right into the agenda for the day. Rambling and cursing the names he had to meet with today. Though you would typically scold him for inviting bad luck onto business dealings, you couldn’t help but smile and laugh along with him. This was the thing that brought back equilibrium. Alfie made things normal, and made you feel like a normal person. Not someone who had just lost a childhood home. Not someone who was being targeted.
As you walked in together, many of the men who had already begun work said their hellos, and gave their sympathies. Alfie grumbled beside you, wanting to keep walking into yours and his little corner. It shouldn’t have bothered him. He knew it shouldn’t. You really didn’t belong to him. But he found that it was all too easy for the flame of jealousy to rise when he saw you give that smile of yours to anyone else. He loved that smile. He yearned for it and saw it as a previous jewel that he coveted and aimed for. And for anyone else to gain it, it felt like a quick stab to his chest. But he kept himself relatively quiet, trying to behave in front of his men. Not letting himself appear as soft, or compromised.
Finally you are able to make it to your desk, and Alfie hands you your calendar. As you touch it, you notice that he’s definitely refiled through it.
“You went through my calendar?”
“Well it is my calendar actually.”
You put the notebook down and turn to him quickly, “well it’s my notes! And I have personal notes in there too, it’s not just about you.”
“Well don’t worry darling your handwriting is so tiny it’s not even legible. I did see your little cartoons though. Very cute that is. But seriously yeah. I bought the calendar. It’s mine. It’s my business in there. And if you hadn’t left right? If you hadn’t left I wouldn’t have had to pilfer through it.”
You just put your head down. There really wasn’t much more to say. But Alfie knows exactly how to fill the silence doesn’t he? “Darling. Come into my office real quick yeah?”
You take your seat in front of him. Alfie at his desk. Still early enough in the morning where his shirt buttons haven’t been ripped off yet in anger. And his hair is set without raking his thick fingers through yet. He considers you for a long moment. Just studying your face. Noticing how you don’t fidget under his eyes anymore. Your breathing even and your back relaxed into the back of the chair.
He sighs, leaning forward on the desk, muscular arms holding himself up. “Treacle… treacle darling I think we need to talk about your place in the business.”
Your heart stopped… did he really just bring you to the office to fire you? “Alfie you are not firing me.”
His head jerked back, “What the… what the fuck are you talking about? Just.. shh be quiet. Shit treacle just let me speak!”
You settle back as you both readjust. Shaking his head he continues, “No no treacle. Listen… I’ve been thinking about last night. How much my… way of communicating scared you. And I just want us to… communicate… expectations.”
You nod slowly. Truthfully, no man has ever talked to you like this. He nodded back, “Alright. Well… darling. Shit how do people do this.”
He rubbed his face as if scrubbing it would bring out the words to the surface, “Ugh treacle listen to me. I am… a bad man. Ok? I have killed people. I have. I have tortured men. I have knocked out half of the men in London. And I love to be on the top. My life, is violent. Ok? I don’t want us to pretend that violence is not a part of this job. Are you with me?”
After assenting, he only continued, “Now, I cannot guarantee you that you will never see violence ever. But, I can guarantee you that I will do my very best to make sure that you see as little as possible. Does that work with you?”
You nodded, “I can agree to that.”
He nodded back, brows furrowed, and letting go of a breath he didn’t know he was even holding. “Excellent. Good good.”
Leaning back, finally relaxing, Alfie continues with his racing thoughts, “I’ve also been thinking treacle… that you need to be shown the other parts of the business yeah? Give you a little more responsibility around here. Let you in more on my other dealings.”
“Other dealings?”
“Well sweetheart you didn’t think the bakery talk was just for show did you? There is in fact a bakery next door. And we got the jewelry shop upstairs. I want you in on it, familiar with everything.”
Alfie begins to rise up out of his seat again, motioning to you, “Come on. Let’s take a trip darling.”
You didn’t know what you were expecting when you went down to the bakery. When he mentioned bakery you pictured… a shack. Something run down with stale bread pilfered from other shops.
But it wasn’t. It was a legitimate bakery. The air warm and full with the smell of hot loaves and cinnamon and sugar. Older grandmotherly women worked behind the counter, smiling and glowing. Alfie tipped his hat towards them, “Morning ladies. Looking wonderful this morning as always.”
They jeered and laughed at their rugged boss, calling him over to test out the newest recipes created. He gave limited critique for the women, sandwiched between loving praise for their work. You were given a loaf as well, told to come in any time you wished.
You then walked into the jewelry shop above the office, and you couldn’t help but feel out of place.
Wall to wall, glass cases of absolutely finery surrounded you. Perhaps it was to keep the sin of coveting at bay, but you tried to not look at jewelry. You tried to not think of yourself as a girl who longed for jewelry. But looking at the glittering jewels and chains, you couldn’t help but feel a thrill run through you. They were beautiful.
You hear Alfie laugh before you realize that your mouth had been gaping open, “Well go on then. Take a look around.”
Your fingers danced along the glass casing, staring at the fine pieces. Like glittering flowers on delicate flower beds, you couldn’t believe it. Long thick golden chains. Silvers bracelets. A diamond tiara even. It wasn’t until the end of the line did you see something that made your heart pause in your chest.
A small golden locket. Heart shaped, with engraved ivy around the edges. Holding it along was a delicate gold chain. It looked so soft, beautiful, and something you had always wanted to wear. You were so entranced by its simple beauty, you jumped when Alfie came behind you.
“You want to try it on?”
You shook your head vigorously, “Oh no no it’s ok.”
“C’mon you want to I know you do.”
“I can’t try on the merchandise!”
“I think I decide who can try on the jewelry yeah? C’mon just try it on. It’s been waiting for someone.”
You smiled, suddenly very shy, “Well… ok. Just for a second.”
Alfie unlocked the case, pulling it out gently, carrying it as though it was the diamond tiara in the case over. He motioned for you to hold your hair away, to let him clasp it around your neck. It was so silent, you being the only two in the shop. All that could be heard was your pounding heart and the sound of Alfie’s breath brushing against your ear. You felt the cool weight against your chest, with Alfie’s warm and heavy hands on your shoulders. He gently positioned you in front a mirror, letting you see it on yourself.
You looked beautiful. It looked like it always belonged to you. As though it was made for you and you alone. The scent of your soap and perfume filled Alfie’s nose, and he wished that all the air in the world was replaced by your smell. He couldn’t hold himself back anymore. He leaned into you, bringing his face to the side of yours. Cheek to cheek, letting his hands run up and down your arms. Feeling the shiver that ran up your spine. “It’s beautiful.” You whisper, suddenly feeling as though you couldn’t catch your breath.
Alfie pressed his lips to your hair, mumbling into you, “It was made for you.”
You feel yourself melt into him, your back falling into his chest, with his strong arms wrapping around you. You heart was pounding, and you could’ve sworn you felt his heart knocking into your back. Your chest was so tight, you felt like your whole body was on fire. Alfie couldn’t stop now. He pressed kisses to your temple, “Tell me to stop.”
You gave no response as you leaned into his touch, him never stopping, trying to restrain himself as he pressed his passion to your temples and cheeks, “Tell me to stop. I’ll never ask anything of you. Tell me you feel nothing for me.”
You gasped, it was too much, but you just wanted to press him closer to you. Wrapping his arms tighter around you, “Alfie..” you whispered.
He turned you around, whispering your name as he pulled you to his chest.
“Alfie?”, Ollie knocked on the door frame of the jewelry shop, concern, shame, and confusion thick in his throat.
Alfie shut his eyes tightly, and you feel the grip on your waist strengthen, “WHAT OLLIE?” He barked out, causing you to snort.
Ollie begins to stammer, “I- I’m sorry Alfie! It’s just uh… Mr. Shelby… he’s here.”
Alfie put his head onto your forehead muttering, “I’m going to fucking shoot him.”
Alfie guides you out of the door, and you can barely make out Alfie telling Ollie to start searching for another job.
Mr. Shelby looks incredibly comfortable in Alfie’s office. Before you can say hello to the man, Alfie butts in, “What the fuck do you want Tommy. You interrupted a very important meeting.”
Tommy smiled at you softly, then turning to Alfie, “Sorry Alfie, but this is about our club. I think you can make a little exception for me eh?”
Alfie just grumbled as he threw himself into his seat, using his pointer finger to direct you and Tommy to your seats. Tommy continued once he settled into his seat, “We’ve got an issue Alfie. Apparently, someone is not too happy about our little arrangement. And evidently… according to some sources… you roughed someone up last night. Which allegedly resulted in someone’s home going up in smoke.”
At this admission Tommy turned to look at you, “My condolences darling. Hope everyone is ok yeah?”
“Don’t look at my secretary. What the fuck are you talking about?” Alfie barks out.
Before turning back to Alfie, Tommy rolls his eyes and breathes in slowly, “Alfie. My men have gotten information that you, in all your wisdom, beat the living daylights out of some idiot. And that idiot, is the nephew of our good friend Mr. Sabini. Now, Mr. Sabini, was not just hurt that you nearly killed his nephew, but he was also hurt that your lovely secretary denied his nephew, and that we are working together, in direct competition with a bar he owns on the same street.”
Alfie felt his stomach drop.
He knew. He knew that it was somehow his fault. Because this is what happens isn’t it? Anytime he allows himself a small comfort or a small glimmer of a dream of something different, it hurts all those around him. It destroys them. It kills them. This time, he hoped it would have been different. That God maybe would have had mercy on him. Allowed him this tenderness. Found him worthy of you.
"Alfie?", you prodded gently. You had risen from your seat on the plush velvet couch to touch his shoulder. His whole body had tensed up at Tommy's admission of evidence. The admission was scary enough, to know that you put your family in danger for simply denying a man. But it wasn't Alfie's to feel guilt for. And you knew he was holding himself responsible. Because that's what he does. He carries the weight of everyone on his own shoulders. Under your touch you feel his muscle tighten and relax immediately. Alfie raised his eyes to stare back at Tommy, whose typically impassible face had the shadow of regret and concern underneath those cold eyes.
"Tommy. I'm not going to let this pass."
"I know you're not Alfie. I think the time has come for Sabini to be removed."
Alfie leans back into his seat, hands folded across his stomach. You removed yourself back to your seat, the real business needed air.
You had never met Mr. Sabini. But you had certainly heard of him. All the girls in your classes spoke about their own encounters with him. How he would corner them and say vulgar things, hoping to get an evening with them. You'd seen him in town on your laundry deliveries with Eli, and you always felt as though you needed to bathe after you locked eyes with him. Eli always walked in front of you, as if to announce that you weren't alone to be approached. And to know that his nephew was much of the same, and went as far as to punish those the way he did for denying him was a shock. The Sabinis had made themselves clear that they weren't above killing for disrespect.
And yet you feared more for the Sabini family than you did your own in this moment. You had seen Alfie be ruthless and loud. You had seen him scream to the point of men wetting themselves, and you had seen Alfie beat a man near death. But this Alfie... this Alfie made your blood run cold. Made you sweat underneath the lamp in the corner. He looked larger than normal. The muscles in his neck and arm twitching every so often. He was near silent. And when he did speak, it was low but rumbling. As if the plates of the earth were moving to the sound of his voice. This wasn't a meeting you took notes for. This was a meeting where the words soaked into your skin, into your bones as you listened to the methodical destruction of the Sabini company.
"Miss Abraham. Come here dear." Alfie called to you finally.
When you got to him, he brought you down to your level, whispering, "I want you to go with Ollie, and he is going to take you home. Go be with your family for the day, draw up some ideas for the gaming club for me alright?"
The way he whispered it so lowly, it was accepting no arguments, despite the fact it had not even reached lunch time yet. You nodded in assent, and he simply responded, "Good girl. I will see you tomorrow."
When you walked into the house, your mother was the only one home, placing the finishing touches on a dress to be picked up in the evening, "Oh darling! You're home early! You feeling alright? You look pale."
You shook your head, suddenly feeling a bit weak, "No mama I'm fine. My boss just heard about what happened and wanted me to go home."
"Mmm, well why don't you sit with me anyway."
You took a seat on the floor across from your mom. You had been sitting like this since you were a child. From playing dolls, to reading to her, to helping sew loose buttons on your family's shirts with her. It was where you gave your mother all your thoughts. All your fears and secrets. It was the confessional and threshing floor of all your worries.
Without looking up from her needlework your mother smoothly spoke, "That's quite a beautiful necklace darling. Did Mr. Solomons send you home with that as well?"
Your stomach dropped, and your hand flew to your chest.
You hadn't taken it off.
"Mama I-"
"My love how long did you think you were going to be able to keep up this ruse? You and I both know that lying is not your strong suit."
Your hands covered your face in embarrassment. "How long have you known?"
Your mother smiled, still not looking up from her work, "Oh since about the fourth week. You looked a little too giddy coming home the night before, so I assumed your boss was incredibly handsome. So I peeked out the window and saw him. I mean really darling did you even try?"
"Ugh... does Papa know?"
"Mmhmm. He was very cross for about two days, but I spoke with him."
"Are you still cross with me?"
It was only now that she stopped her steady work, "I'm only upset that you didn't feel as though you could trust me and your father. I understand darling, you wanted your independence and to figure things out for yourself. But we love you darling, and we want to know these things so we can just know you are ok."
You got closer to your mother, laying your head on her knees, "I just didn't want you to worry. I didn't want you to feel as though I was a burden."
"Oh hush." She said, smoothing out the hairs on your head, "You have never been a burden. And your troubles are never a burden. You need to believe that darling, you are not a burden to us. You don't need to shoulder everything on your own. Not when you have us."
You nodded, feeling the tears pool and gather on your mother's dress. The stress of the past 48 hours finally overcoming you. And you told her everything. About the day to day job. About the gaming club. About the fire. About Alfie. About what he made you feel.... you laid it all bare for your mother, who nodded and received it all. And you finally felt the weight of 1000 stones finally lift off your chest.
Back at the office, the room is full of smoke and two bottles of whiskey slowly depleting. Tommy and Alfie have drawn up a master plan of an offensive, a war to end it all. For 2 years they have dealt separately with Sabini. But to Alfie, this was a step too far. He targeted an innocent girl. His secretary. For what? To protect the 'honor' of a boy? It would not stand.
After the construction, Alfie and Tommy slumped in their chairs, mulling over the day. Thinking of everything to come.
"You love her don't you."
Alfie's eyes flicked to him, Tommy's cold eyes never shifting away , piercing him through the smokey haze. "None of your fucking business mate. She's just a good secretary. And a good girl. Doesn't deserve this."
"No. No a good secretary gets a raise every so often. A good secretary doesn't come into meetings and give advice. A good secretary doesn't get this protection Alfie."
Alfie didn't respond. Because if he did respond it would become real. It wouldn't just be something he could bury anymore. Once he said it, it would change everything. Tommy put out his cigarette, "You love that girl Alfie. That adds a whole new element to this game we are playing with."
"She is not a fucking pawn Tommy."
"Well to Sabini she is. Try as you might Alfie, that's what happens to men like us. Those we love turn into game pieces. This whole city is a fucking chess board."
"You are talking as if you're a god Tommy."
"And you are talking as if there is one to protect you, As if there is something to protect that girl."
"There is something to protect her you shit. It's me. I'll kill all of London before a single hair on her head is touched. That includes you mate, so don't talk to me about game pieces, or protection, or people dying alright? Because no matter what Sabini throws at us, not matter if this sick plan of our fails, no matter if all of London burns, I will make sure that she is safe!"
Tommy just smiles in the wake of Alfie's fury, lighting up another smoke, "And that is why I know we will not fail."
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