#what’s your kidney stone
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Too late to poll but probably some unholy cosmic entity that feeds off my life force (that’s the pain)
screw birthstones, whats your kidney stone
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crazyhickofftheirrocker · 2 months ago
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Move over Ryan, Sally's coming for your best allyship award
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regular-lord-reckoner · 3 days ago
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so i took my car in today because i thought it might just need some more brake fluid and although i tried to just look at it myself i couldn't for the life of me figure out which part under the hood was the brake fluid reservoir without having to lean all over my car and get all dirty, so i figured i might just have to pay a service fee and whatever for the fluid itself...
turns out i need all new brake pads !!
ahaha
haha
ha
yay
#i swear to god it's like my car knows whenever it's tax time#like 'hey can i have some money pwease? pweaaaaase just a thousand dollars for new brakes pretty pwease?!'#i guess!!!!!!#i kinda need 'em#jokes on you though because i haven't even filed my taxes yet#i'm gonna have to wait until next week when i get paid but they said i should be able to drive on them for maybe another month as they are#i had other stuff i was gonna do today but given the circumstances i decided to just park my ass back at home#mostly i've been trying to do some ~research of the local libraries to prepare for school which is starting....soon#but i'll just have to postpone my research for the time being#it's funny too because i was watching a tiktok the other day of 'what to do if your breaks fail'#i even almost scrolled past it but something told me to go back and watch#and now i guess i know why#fortunately i haven't had to use that information just yet#but dear god today whenever i put on the breaks it sounds like thunder#just a terrible sound for a car to make#prior to that all that happened was my break light kept coming on whenever i accelerated#it would go off once i'd been rolling for a little bit or sometimes if i'd ease off the gas and then accelerate again#and when i tried to research it myself that's where i got the break fluid thing from#really hoped it was going to be that simple but it never is!!#that's just the rules!!#so anyway that's how my weekend's starting off#not great tbh but it could be a lot worse so i'm just gonna be grateful this is something i can fix#(even if i really don't want to)#and just move on with it and hope nothing else tears up on this goddamn car#because it wasn't that long ago i had to take it in for something else so....#if i could go like....mmm a year maybe before i need any more expensive ass repairs i'd really appreciate it#tires i'm looking you straight in the eye don't you even think about it#i did have my follow up with my urologist today also and they did another x-ray#she said she doesn't see the stone anymore so i believe it did in fact pass so that's some good news !!#we're just gonna keep an eye on the one that's on the other side and still in my kidney
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so-very-small · 2 years ago
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i genuinely could never be a borrower. i cannot climb a rope and am frequently riddled with pains and ailments. ur telling me i have to scale the equivalent of a three story building just to get some saltine crackers? i’d rather rot and die
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kasumingo · 1 year ago
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tumblr: soda is actually good for you!!
chubbyemu: there is not a single kind of soda that is actually not harmful to you
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13thpythagoras · 6 months ago
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yeah half of my blog is DIY healthcare because I can technically afford the monthly premiums but what am I getting? It's basically appendicitis / accident insurance, there's not much other value I see in western medicine. And if I do get appendicitis I'm headed to the Good Sam to plead a charity case, and if I get stuck with $80 k debt for appendicitis I'll just have to fight it. Paying the copays would probably be $20k anyway and premiums over the years, another $30k so what's a last $30k to bet I'll never need any of that bs?... I mean in Cuba they do this procedure for hundreds. I could fly NetJets to Mexico (and perhaps Mexico to Cuba) and get it done in either of those countries for a zero off the USA's cash price tag, but air ambulance Netjet with me inside dying of appendicitis doesn't sound too wise so medical tourism is still likely best left for preventative / elective procedures. (can I preventatively get my appendix removed lol)
But we have remedies to diseases capitalism can't crack because our remedies aren't constrained by the need to make a fascist-level-of-profit / monopolizer's-patent for big pharma.
Can we also unpack how Jonas Salk developed the polio vaccine for free and gave it away? Can we unpack the incentives for innovation at work there?
Why was Salk driven to innovate while going total George Washington mode on the victory lap, giving away his fascist prize to the public in exchange for immortality as a truly magnanimous man of the people.
Could it be?
More than just money incentivizes human beings to innovate in medicine?
Could it be, that perhaps more than money drives human action towards saving each other's very lives?
I definitely can't say this for a hospital, or a pharma corp, but I would cross the road to save your life. I would try, I would take a risk to do that, I wouldn't stick my hand out for a $100k of oncology bills like the hospital would, or they tell you to "i dunno i guess just go die of cancer ya brokeass" is what western medicine says. Even if you pay those bills, they won't cure you; you still hear from your provider who wears a pink ribbon "cancer is an incurable disease."
Then what are you researching? lmao
If western medicine is religiously committed to the idea that cancer is un-curable, why the pink ribbons?
Why flood the "awareness channels" with "awareness PSAs" for the most-well known disease on the planet? Could they possibly be doing that to hide something from the public / Google results?
Why do we spend a trillion a year on research for something for which we're religiously opposed to there being a cure?
Nothing adds up until you accept the truth seen by Rick Simpson et al, that western medicine can cure cancer easily they just can't patent that cure. That's the real problem, they can't MONOPOLIZE the many cures to cancer; they cannot control that capital as fascists so they deny that it could even exist as a possibility. Holy gaslights Batman!
[how the critics sound]No! Big⛽️💡 pharma billionaires would never ever ⛽️💡gaslight us! No! no ⛽️💡no no ⛽️💡no ⛽️💡no ⛽️💡no! I had a very charismatic chemistry professor in college and he said cancer has no cure and I believed him, he was so handsome! Science is never wrooooong raaaaaaaaaaa!!!!! I refuse to believe ⛽️💡Pfizer ⛽️💡would ever choose profit over saving lives! [/how the critics sound]
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wanderingknights · 3 months ago
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pucksandpower · 2 months ago
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Kiss It Better
Charles Leclerc x medical student!Reader
Summary: your boyfriend has a habit of faking injuries in order to receive some tender loving care
Warnings: 18+ content and non-life threatening health issues
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You let yourself into the Monaco apartment you share with your boyfriend, dumping your heavy backpack by the door with a sigh. Another long day of classes and clinical rotations. Being a medical student is exhausting.
“Charles? I’m home!” You call out, slipping off your shoes. No response. Frowning slightly, you pad down the hallway toward the living room. “Charles? Are you here?”
That’s when you hear it — a muffled groan coming from the bedroom. Your heart leaps into your throat as you rush over, pushing open the door. There’s Charles lying on the bed, face contorted in apparent agony.
“Charles! Oh my god, what’s wrong?” You hurry to his side, dropping to your knees by the bedside. His eyes are screwed shut, jaw clenched as he lets out another pained groan.
“It hurts,” he grits out between clenched teeth. “So much pain ...”
“What hurts? Where does it hurt?” Your mind is racing, trying to diagnose based on his symptoms. Does he have gastritis? Kidney stones? A twisted intestine? You reach for his wrist to check his pulse.
Charles doesn’t answer, just squeezes his eyes shut even tighter and groans loudly. You feel a surge of panic. This could be serious!
“Charles, you have to tell me what’s wrong so I can help you! Where’s the pain?” You grip his arm urgently. “Should I call an ambulance?”
“No … no ambulance,” he manages to choke out, shaking his head minutely. “Just need … you ...”
“Me?” You stare at him in bewilderment. “Charles, I’m just a med student, if you’re really sick we need to get you to a hospital right away!”
He cracks open one eye to look at you piteously. “Please … you’re the only one who can make it better.” His voice is strained as he reaches down to grasp your hand, guiding it lower … lower ...
You suck in a shocked breath as his hand moves yours to cup his crotch over his thin athletic shorts. “Charles! Is that what hurts? Your … special place?”
He lets out a shuddering breath and nods weakly. “Yes … I need you to take care of it. Only you can fix this pain.”
It hits you then — the dramatic groaning, the vague answers, guiding your hand … Charles isn’t sick or injured at all. He’s turned on beyond belief and putting on this whole pained act to get you to help relieve him.
You gape at him, caught between exasperation and reluctant amusement at his antics. “You complete dork! I was so worried something was seriously wrong!”
Charles finally breaks into a sheepish grin, though he’s still palming himself urgently through his shorts with your hand. “What can I say? I’ve been thinking about you all day. Imagining you in those tight little scrubs … bending over examining patients ...” He gives an unconvincing whimper. “The ache has been unbearable, ma chérie.”
You roll your eyes, but can’t fight the smile tugging at your lips or the warmth unfurling low in your belly. Even after all this time, Charles can still make your heart flutter with his flirtatious charm and that roguish smile. You lean in closer until your face is just inches from his.
“Is that so?” You murmur, voice dropping into a sultry register. You give him a lingering stroke through the thin fabric and he draws in a sharp breath. “Well, we can’t have you suffering, can we Mr. Leclerc?”
“Please, no more suffering,” he whimpers unconvincingly, eyes sparkling with mischief now. “You’re the only one who can cure me, Doctor.”
You chuck softly at his overacting and lean down to kiss him, long and deep. Charles moans into your mouth, hands coming up to tangle in your hair as the kiss turns hungry, passionate. When you finally break apart, you’re both panting harshly.
“Well then, I better take a look and get you … taken care of,” you murmur, slowly inching his shorts down over his straining erection. His hips rut up shamelessly as you wrap a hand around his hot, silky length.
“Oh god … yes ...” Charles groans, head tipping back against the pillows as you start to stroke him firmly. His eyes slip shut again and his breath comes in harsh pants as you steadily work him over. You drink in the sight of him like this — cheeks flushed, lips parted, utterly lost in the pleasure you’re giving him.
“Tell me if it still hurts,” you tease lightly, swiping your thumb over the slick head in a way that makes his body jerk. “We have to take care of all your aches and pains.”
“It hurts so good, mon ange,” he gasps out, hips rocking shamelessly up into your fist now. “Don’t stop … please don’t stop ...”
You lean down to trail hot, open-mouthed kisses along the taut cords of his neck, relishing the whimpers and moans you pull from him. Charles always loves a bit of teasing during sex. You torture him sweetly by licking and sucking at the sensitive spots that drive him wild even as your hand continues to steadily pump his length.
“You like that, don’t you baby?” You tease against his skin as he writhes beneath you, mewling and chanting your name. “Can’t get enough of your girlfriend playing doctor for you.”
“Yes, oh god yes,” he gasps, hands fisting tightly in the sheets as his hips stutter. You can see his abdomen tensing, muscles clenching as he nears the edge. “I’m so close … I’m going to-”
You silence him with a searing kiss, swallowing his cries as you jerk him firmly through his climax. Charles bucks and shudders, body pulled taut as a bowstring for long moments until he finally slumps back against the mattress with a ragged groan. There’s a sticky mess between your bodies but neither of you care in the least.
“Better now?” You tease lightly, gently stroking the sweaty curls from his forehead. He blinks up at you looking utterly blissed out and sated.
“I’ll say,” he rumbles throatily, pulling you down for another lingering kiss. “My own sexy doctor, taking such good care of me.”
You grin at his playful tone, happiness blooming in your chest. You’re so lucky to have this man in your life — this kind, generous, funny, impossibly charming man who somehow loves you just as much as you love him. What did you ever do to deserve someone like Charles Leclerc?
He seems to read your thoughts in your eyes and smiles softly. “I love you, do you know that? So much.”
Your breath catches and you lean down to rest your forehead against his. “I love you too, you big goof. Even when you pull crazy stunts like this to get my attention.”
Charles chuckles unrepentantly, cupping the back of your neck to hold you close. “What can I say, ma belle? I’m skilled at getting what I want.”
His eyes are shining with quiet devotion and you know, without a doubt, that underneath the teasing bravado Charles truly means those words. He loves you, wholly and completely. A swell of emotion rises in your throat.
“Yeah, well, lucky for you I don’t mind playing doctor,” you murmur, leaning in to kiss him again. Charles’ arms come around you, holding you flush against his body as the kiss turns heated once more. You’re breathless when you part again.
“If I get sick, will you put on that naughty little doctor’s outfit for me?” He waggles his eyebrows at you comically.
You laugh out loud, swatting his arm in mock chastisement. “You’ll be lucky if I don’t send you to a real hospital and leave you to the not-so-tender mercies of Nurse Helga.”
“No need for jealousy, mon amour,” he croons, rolling you onto your back and hovering over you. There’s a wicked glint in his eyes as he leans down to nuzzle your neck, making you shiver. “You’ll always be my favorite caregiver.”
And with that, he shows you just how much he appreciates your caregiving in a very thorough, very passionate way …
***
A few weeks later, you’re settled on the plush couch in Charles’ motorhome, legs tucked up under you as you watch replays of the post-race interviews on the large TV screen. Your heart swells with pride as your boyfriend appears, beaming and sweaty in his race suit as he answers questions about his thrilling come-from-behind victory today.
“It feels incredible to get this win,” Charles is saying, running a hand through his tousled hair. “The team worked so hard and we’ve had some tough races recently, so to finally get back on the top step is amazing.”
You can’t help but grin at his obvious elation. Few people know just how driven and dedicated Charles is — how much time and effort he pours into racing at the absolute highest level. Seeing that hard work and sacrifice pay off never fails to fill you with joy.
“I just want to thank the team again for all their-” Charles breaks off, wrinkling his nose and reaching up to dab at his lip with a finger. When his fingertips come away smeared with red, you frown in concern. Is he hurt?
“Ooh, looks like I bit my lip out there,” Charles says with a rueful chuckle, still prodding gingerly at his mouth as a thin trickle of blood runs over his chin. “Must have been clenching my teeth a little too hard battling for position.”
“I didn’t realize you were injured!” You start to rise from the couch with worry etched on your face, moving towards your now off-screen boyfriend. “Here, let me take a look ...”
“No, no, it’s just a little cut.” Charles tries to wave you off, smiling reassuringly even as he winces again, dabbing at the fresh flow of blood. “No need to fuss, mon cœur. Just a tiny thing.”
You hesitate, hands on your hips as you scrutinize him skeptically. Charles has a bit of a flair for the dramatic at times, always playing up little hurts or mishaps as if he were holding vigil at his deathbed. But you know from experience that he tends to downplay any actual significant injuries.
He senses your continued concern and lets out a theatrical moan, tipping his head back dramatically. “Oh, the AGONY! So much pain … so much … if only there was a way to make it stop ...”
Your eyebrows shoot up as realization hits. Oh, you know that tone. And the coquettish look he’s giving you from under his lashes, lower lip caught between his teeth … yes, you definitely recognize those signs. You shake your head slowly, fighting a grin.
“Seriously, Charles? Not this again.”
“Non, I fear it’s no use,” he groans pitifully, draping a hand over his eyes. “My poor, mangled mouth … so damaged and bloody … the pain is becoming … unbearable ...” Charles pauses to peek at you from between his splayed fingers, eyes twinkling mischievously.
You put your hands on your hips and arch one eyebrow at his antics. “Uh huh. Is this the part where I’m supposed to swoop in all concerned and give you a bunch of sympathy kisses to make your agony all better?”
“If you insist,” he quips, pursing his lips in an exaggerated pout. The effect is somewhat ruined by the fresh smear of crimson at the corner of his mouth.
You can’t help but laugh softly as you move closer, cupping his stubbly jaw in your palms. “For someone so good with their mouth, you’re just a giant wimp, you know that?”
“Maybe,” Charles allows with a roguish grin. “But you love me for it, no?”
“Unfortunately, yes.” You trace your thumb lightly over the plump curve of his lower lip, wiping a smear of blood. “Now hold still, I guess I better give you a little tender loving care for that gaping wound.”
“Oh please, doctor! I need your magical healing touch, I’m in so much — mmph!”
You cut off his theatrical plea with a firm press of your lips, kissing him hard and insistent. Charles moans into your mouth, the sound sending a shiver down your spine even as his hands come up to grip your hips and pull you flush against him.
The coppery tang of blood mingles on your tongues as the kiss turns heated, deep and wet and dizzying. You suck lightly on his split lip, gentling when he winces, and Charles rewards you by dragging blunt nails over the sensitive skin at the small of your back.
When you finally part, you’re both panting harshly, staring at each other with heavy-lidded eyes. Charles’ pupils are blown wide, lips red and slick.
“Better?” You murmur, voice low and throaty.
He gives a slight shake of his head, tendrils of curls falling over his forehead. “No … I need more treatment, I fear. The pain … it still lingers ...”
You chuckle at his dramatics, hands sliding up to tangle in his hair as you tug him back in for another searing kiss. Charles releases a noise that’s almost a growl against your lips, big hands cupping your backside and grinding you firmly against him.
You can feel him, hot and hard already as he ruts shamelessly against you. The desperate urgency of his movements thrills you, sends sparks of arousal zinging through your veins. Charles always gets so worked up so quickly when you two play these little games.
This time it’s you who pulls back first, sucking in a shaky breath. His eyes are blazing, swollen lips parted invitingly. You deliberately rake your gaze over his disheveled appearance — the tousled curls, the swipe of crimson over his mouth, the rapid rise and fall of his chest.
“Mr. Leclerc, are you quite sure your … condition requires such aggressive treatment?” You try for a clinical tone but it comes out more of a lustful purr. Charles’ nostrils flare and his fingers tighten convulsively against the curves of your ass.
“Yes, yes, it absolutely does,” he rasps out urgently, already trying to pull you back in. “Please, you must heal me ...”
He captures your lips again in a fierce, demanding kiss and you melt into him with a soft moan. His clever tongue is doing wicked things, slick and hot as it slides against yours in a sensual mimicry of what’s surely to come.
A teasing nip to his swollen lower lip makes Charles gasp and jerk against you. Taking shameless advantage, you swiftly divest him of his sweat-damp race suit until he’s bare from the waist up. Muscles rippling beneath tawny skin, his toned chest and abdomen shiny from his hours in the cockpit.
It’s a deliciously debauched look that makes arousal curl hotly in your belly. You drag your lips in open-mouthed kisses along the sharp line of his jaw, down the strong column of his throat as he tips his head back with a groan.
“There … is that helping with your … condition, Mr. Leclerc?” You tongue at the hollow of his collarbone, tasting salt and musk as your hands skim over his chest in teasing caresses.
“Ohh god, yes … but I need more ...” He’s panting harshly now, muscles jumping as you rake sharp nails over one reddened nipple. “Please … more ...”
“Good. Then you’d better hold still for me to examine the problem area more thoroughly.” Before Charles can blink, you’ve shoved him back to sprawl gracelessly against the soft leather couch. He stares up at you with heavy-lidded eyes, lips parted enticingly as his chest heaves.
You drink in the sight for a long moment, satisfaction curling in your belly. Sometimes it’s nice to be the one calling the shots, to see Charles squirming and flushed and desperate beneath you for a change.
Slowly — torturously — you strip out of your own clothes until you’re equally bare. Charles tracks your every movement with burning eyes. When you sink down to straddle his hips, both of you groan at the scorching friction as bare skin meets bare skin.
“God, you’re exquisite,” he husks out reverently, hands trailing up the dips and curves of your body with something like awe. “An absolute goddess ...”
You can’t resist leaning down to capture his mouth in another heated, messy kiss as you grind down shamelessly against his rigid length. Charles muffles a hoarse cry into your lips, hips jerking up to meet your movements.
You let the kiss turn sloppy and wet and deep, both of you luxuriating in the hot slide of tongues and the delicious glide of bare skin. Charles’ hands roam greedily over your body, squeezing and caressing as you rock together in a sensual push and pull.
“Please … I need you ...” he growls against your lips when you momentarily break apart. His voice is wrecked, eyes dark with lust. “Need to be inside you … now ...”
You shudder at his heated words, arousal a molten ache between your thighs. Reaching down, you grasp his rigid length and line him up with your slick entrance. Charles sucks in a sharp breath, muscles going taut beneath you as the swollen head catches on your folds.
“Like this?” You breathe, swiveling your hips in a teasing grind that has him throwing his head back with a guttural groan.
“Yes! Putain, just like that ...” He bucks up helplessly, trying to force you to sink down onto him, but you resist with a low chuckle.
“Patience, Mr. Leclerc. Don’t you want me to take care of your … condition properly?” You murmur, lips brushing the shell of his ear. You punctuate the words with another maddeningly slow roll of your hips and Charles legitimately whimpers.
“Yes, yes … anything! I’ll do anything, just please ...” His eyes are wild, fingers digging into the soft flesh of your thighs hard enough to leave marks. “I need you so badly, ma chérie ...”
Smiling, you finally take pity and sink down in one smooth glide until he’s sheathed to the hilt. The sensation of being utterly filled, stretched and burning in the most delicious way, makes you throw your head back with a long moan. Beneath you, Charles lets out a broken litany of French and English and Italian curses as his hips pump up in short, jerky thrusts.
You set a driving pace, lifting and dropping in a dizzying rhythm as Charles matches you stroke for stroke. The room is soon filled with the lewd sounds of slick flesh and harsh breathing, punctuated by grateful whines and moans. You lean down to capture his mouth again, the angle shifting to let him plunge even deeper until you’re both trembling on the razor’s edge.
“You feel so good, so incredible,” Charles pants harshly against your lips between sloppy kisses. He grips your hips hard enough to bruise, using the leverage to somehow take you even faster and harder. The pace is almost punishing but you can’t get enough. “Always so tight … so perfect for me ...”
His praise and the delicious drag of his thick length have you quickly spiraling higher. You brace your hands on his heaving chest as you throw your head back, overcome. Every nerve in your body feels electrified, set alight from the inside by the sheer intensity of your joining.
“Oh god … Charles, I’m gonna-” You cry out sharply as he aims for that one angle that has stars bursting behind your eyes. He latches onto your exposed throat, sucking a stinging mark as his thumb finds your pearl and begins rubbing merciless circles.
That’s all it takes to send you shattering apart with a keen, clenching down with bruising force as your climax rips through you. Charles pounds up twice more, teeth sinking into the juncture of your neck and shoulder, before following you over the edge with a guttural roar. His hips stutter erratically as he empties himself in hot pulses that you can actually feel hitting deep.
You both gradually come down, slumping gracelessly together as your harsh breathing slowly evens out. Charles carefully rolls until you’re cradled against his sweat-slicked chest, nuzzling languidly at your temple. His palms stroke up and down your spine in a gesture that’s somehow both possessive and worshipful.
After a few minutes, you let out a breathless giggle that has him pulling back slightly to look at you quizzically.
“What’s so funny?” His voice is gravelly and well-fucked.
You tap the wound on his lip lightly, tsking in playful reproach. “I’ll say this — you certainly know how to get my attention when you’re … ailing. I think you milked that little injury for all it was worth.”
Charles doesn’t even have the grace to look sheepish. He breaks into a slow, self-satisfied grin and shrugs unapologetically. “What can I say? Worked, didn’t it?”
You roll your eyes but can’t fight your own matching smile as you lean in to kiss him softly, carefully avoiding his split lip. When you pull back, you brush back the tendrils of hair from his forehead with a tenderness that makes his eyes go warm and molten.
“You’re ridiculous, Charles Leclerc. Completely ridiculous … but I love you.”
His smile somehow grows even more blinding. “I love you too, mon ange. And I always will.”
His sincerity washes over you in a wave. You know without a doubt that despite his antics, his words ring completely true. This funny, passionate, caring, magnificent man truly does love you with every fiber of his being. And you love him just the same.
Maybe you’ll both drive each other crazy for the rest of your lives … but at least you’ll never be bored. Settling back against his chest, you let your eyes drift shut contentedly. Yes, there’s nowhere else you’d rather be than right here in Charles’ arms.
***
A few months later, you’re woken abruptly in the dead of night by the sounds of muffled groaning coming from beside you. At first you think it must just be a dream, but then Charles lets out a pained whimper and your eyes fly open.
“Charles?” You blink groggily and prop yourself up on one elbow to peer at him in the dim light filtering through the curtains. “Hey, are you okay?”
He’s curled into a tight ball on his side, arms wrapped around his midsection as if cradling his stomach. A sheen of sweat glistens on his brow and his face is pinched in an unmistakable expression of agony.
Alarm spikes through you and you quickly reach over to grasp his shoulder, giving him a gentle shake. “Charles? Baby, what’s wrong?”
Charles just groans again, a low wounded sound that makes the hairs on the back of your neck stand up. He’s trembling finely against you, teeth clenched and eyes screwed shut against the obvious wave of pain rippling through him.
“Talk to me,” you urge, trying to keep the rising panic from your voice. “Where does it hurt? Should I call an ambulance?”
For a long moment he seems incapable of speech, muscles going rigid and a harsh gasp tearing from his lips. You watch helplessly as he rides out the spasm, cold dread coiling in the pit of your stomach. This is bad … this doesn’t seem like one of his pranks or games to get attention. Charles looks to be in genuine, serious distress.
“Charles?” You try again once he’s relaxed slightly, dragging in shallow panting breaths through his nose. His eyes slit open to mere glassy slits, unfocused and hazy with pain.
“M’stomach ...” he finally gets out through gritted teeth, voice thin and strained. “It hurts so bad … like I’m being stabbed ...”
Your own abdomen clenches reflexively at the words as your brain kicks into high gear. Severe, stabbing abdominal pain that seems to be localized in one area and radiating out … it could potentially be appendicitis. That would definitely explain the excruciating nature of Charles’ discomfort, as well as why he’s curled in the fetal position. Appendicitis is considered a medical emergency — a ruptured appendix can lead to a life-threatening infection if left untreated.
“Okay, we need to get you to a hospital now.” You scramble out of bed and quickly throw on some clothes, grabbing your keys and phone. “I’m calling for an ambulance to come get you. Just stay still and try to breathe evenly.”
Charles doesn’t argue or even crack one of his customary smirks or jokes, just nods weakly and tries to pull himself into an even tighter ball. It’s frightening, seeing the normally confident and charismatic man so thoroughly debilitated by the waves of torment rolling through him.
The emergency dispatcher responds promptly and assures you that an ambulance is being dispatched to your address straight away. You quickly relay the situation to them — the acute pain, localized in the lower right quadrant of the abdomen, along with the nausea, fever, and Charles’ otherwise good health. They seem to share your suspicion of appendicitis and promise to give you further instruction once the paramedics arrive.
In the meantime, you hurry back to Charles’ side and try to keep him as comfortable as possible. You gingerly help him out of bed inch by agonizing inch, grimacing at the stifled cries he can’t quite bite back. It’s slow going, but eventually you have him propped up against the pillows and headboard in a semi-upright position that seems to ease his suffering slightly. You grab a cool damp washcloth and gently sponge the beads of sweat from his ashen face, murmuring soothing nonsense as he pants through another visible spasm.
“You’re alright, just keep breathing,” you coach him. “In and out, nice and slowly … the ambulance will be here any minute now.”
“Hurts so much ...” he whimpers, looking utterly pitiful and nothing like the cocky, self-assured star athlete he normally is. It nearly breaks your heart to see.
“I know, I know ...” You stroke his sweat-dampened curls back off his forehead. “And I’m sorry, but please no joking right now, okay? I want to stay focused in case … in case this is really serious. Like, potentially life-threatening serious.”
A ghost of a smile tugs at the corner of his mouth, there and gone in a flash. “Trust me … m’not … feeling cheeky right now.”
You press a feather-light kiss to his clammy forehead, relieved that he seems to understand the gravity of the situation. “I didn’t think you were. Just hang in there for me, okay?”
Ten long, agonizing minutes later, you finally hear sirens blaring outside. The paramedics move swiftly once you let them in, whisking Charles onto a gurney and starting an IV line. They pepper both of you with rapid-fire questions as they assess him, all while carefully not jostling his abdomen too much to avoid exacerbating the pain.
All too soon, though, it’s time for them to whisk him away to the hospital. You trail after them anxiously, only pulling up short when Charles suddenly grasps your hand like a lifeline.
“Wait … wait!” His eyes are still hooded with pain but there’s fierce urgency there too. “Kiss me one more time? Before they take me in?”
Your heart clenches in your chest at the pleading in his tone. Brushing your thumb soothingly over his cheekbone, you lean down and press the sweetest, gentlest kiss to his parted lips. Charles sighs and seems to melt into you for a moment before the gurney is jostled and he grunts in agony again.
“Don’t worry, I’ll be right behind you,” you promise softly. “We’ll get you all taken care of.”
He nods weakly and blows out a harsh breath as the paramedics start wheeling him back towards the elevator. You let his hand slip from yours reluctantly as you watch him go, then hurry to grab the essentials and follow. The whole way to the hospital your mind whirls with fearful possibilities as you pray that whatever is causing Charles such terrible pain, it isn’t life-threatening.
Hours later, after CT scans and blood tests and evaluations from the E.R. doctors, you finally get confirmation — it is indeed acute appendicitis. Charles is swiftly admitted and prepped for emergency surgery to remove the severely inflamed organ before it ruptures.
You’re pacing anxiously in the pre-op area, wringing your hands, as nurses bustle around him getting the I.V.s ready. In the harsh fluorescent lighting, Charles looks small and pale against the crisp white sheets. But he greets you with a wan smile when you approach his bedside.
“Well … this is certainly not how I thought this day would go,” he quips tiredly, always looking for an opportunity to try and lighten the mood. You snort a quiet laugh despite yourself, allowing your fingers to brush against his arm in a gentle caress.
“Yeah, you and me both. Believe me, I didn’t think the first time I’d ever have to rush you to the emergency room would be for a burst appendix of all things!”
Charles frowns thoughtfully, looking exhausted and drained but mercifully no longer in dire, crippling agony. “Remind me … have I ever pretended to have appendicitis before?”
“No, somehow that particular organ didn’t come up in any of your medical fantasies,” you tease lightly. Then your smile falters as you recall just how horrifically bad it had looked earlier. The memory of Charles stifling those tortured groans, jaw clenched and body wound tighter than a bowstring, has a sobering effect. “But I’m really glad this wasn’t some dumb prank or act this time. You were … it seemed so awful, I was really terrified there for a while.”
His eyes soften and he captures your hand to give it a comforting squeeze. “I know. I’m just sorry I put you through that kind of scare with all my previous fake bouts of pain to rile you up.” Charles grimaces ruefully. “Not my finest habit, in retrospect.”
“Well, we can discuss suitable penance for all that later.” You try for a playful wink though it falls a bit flat against your lingering nerves.
Just then a nurse bustles over, all brisk efficiency as she prepares to wheel Charles back to surgery. “Alright Mr. Leclerc, we’re going to take you back now. The anesthesiologist is ready.”
You squeeze Charles’ hand one more time before leaning down to press a soft kiss to his forehead. “I’ll be right here when you wake up, okay?”
He nods bravely even as the nurse starts pushing the bed toward the operating room doors. “See you soon, mon amour. Try not to worry too much.”
“Me? Worry?” You force a small smile, desperately attempting to keep things light despite the knot of tension in your gut. “When do I ever do that?”
Charles chuckles weakly before disappearing through the swinging double doors. You stand there for a long moment staring at the entryway, running your hands through your hair agitatedly. This entire situation is your worst nightmare — your loved one being wheeled into surgery, their life quite literally in someone else’s hands.
Blowing out a shaky breath, you turn to find a place to wait during the procedure. It’s going to be a tense few hours, that’s for sure. You just have to trust that the doctors and nurses will do everything in their power to get Charles through this safely.
Several agonizing hours later, a surgeon in scrubs finally appears to fetch you from the waiting room with an update. Your heart leaps into your throat but the man is smiling, so it can’t be too terrible, right?
“Ms. Y/N? I’m Dr. Beaumont, I operated on Mr. Leclerc. I’m pleased to report that the surgery was a complete success. We were able to remove his inflamed appendix without any complications before it could rupture.”
You nearly collapse with relief, legs going watery. “Oh, thank god! He’s okay then?”
“He’s doing very well, all things considered,” Dr. Beaumont confirms with a nod. “Of course, we’ll need to keep him here for a few days to monitor for any signs of infection or complications from the anesthesia. But barring any unforeseen issues, I expect him to make a full recovery within a couple weeks.”
“That’s … oh, that’s wonderful news. Thank you, Doctor. Truly.” The words are woefully inadequate but you hope he can hear the depth of gratitude behind them.
A few minutes later, you’re settled into a chair at Charles’ bedside in the recovery ward. He’s still unconscious, face lax and peaceful in drugged sleep as the anesthesia slowly wears off. His chest rises and falls evenly with each reassuring breath. You reach out to gently brush some wayward curls from his forehead, relief crashing over you in waves.
It’s only been a few hours, but it already feels like a lifetime ago that Charles was writhing and groaning in unspeakable agony. To see him now, resting comfortably with the threat neutralized, it’s almost surreal.
You lean forward to press a feather-light kiss to his forehead, breathing in the familiar, grounding scent of him. “You really gave me a scare today, Leclerc,” you murmur against his skin. “But I’m so thankful you’re okay.”
His eyelids flutter slightly, lashes brushing high cheekbones as he starts to slowly swim back toward consciousness. You sit back and simply watch, letting the tension finally drain from your shoulders as he gradually blinks awake.
“Hey there, champ,” you say softly when his eyes find yours, still looking a bit dazed and glassy. “How are you feeling?”
Charles considers this for a moment, taking stock. “Floaty … but not too much pain anymore.” His tongue darts out to wet dry lips. “Did they ...”
“Yeah, they took out your appendix,” you say, unable to stop the relieved smile that curves your mouth. “Surgery went perfectly, and the doctor says you’re going to be just fine.”
He returns the smile, looking exhausted but still radiant with that dimpled grin you love so much. “Well … maybe there is an upside then.”
You tilt your head quizzically. “An upside to your burst appendix nearly killing you?”
“Of course.” Charles releases a tired chuckle, leaning back against the pillows. His gaze grows impish despite his pallor. “At least now I’ll save some weight in the car, no?”
You stare at him for one long beat of silence … before bursting into somewhat hysterical laughter, tears of sheer relief and exasperation pricking the corners of your eyes. Trust Charles to find the humor even in the most dire, frightening circumstances.
“You’re unbelievable, you know that?” You roll your eyes fondly as your giggles taper off, leaning forward to take his hand and squeeze tightly. “Honestly Charles, what am I going to do with you?”
His expression grows impossibly tender as he squeezes back just as firmly. “Just keep loving me, ma chérie. No matter how many stupid jokes I make or stunts I pull to get your attention.”
You hold his gaze for a long moment, letting the warmth and sincerity of his words wash over you. Despite his recent trauma, you can see the pure devotion shining in his eyes. How could you ever want anything else?
“Always,” you whisper, fiercely meaning it with every fiber of your being. “I’ll always love you, Charles Leclerc. No matter what.”
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truthcakes · 2 years ago
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I feel so shitty.
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eldritchmochi · 2 years ago
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actual literal things ive been told by an assortment of doctors: any (non-alcoholic) liquid is a net gain as far as hydration goes, including coffee and juice and soda
there are also sound reasons for drinking more than just water; i have a chronic condition that means my electrolytes are basically always out of whack, so i drink an electrolyte drink at least a few times a week, or else i will deadass faint. maintaining electrolytes is also important for hydration, because if your electrolytes are whack, you dont use and store water as effectively (and if you drink *too much* water, you can flush out nutrients you shouldnt)
i also have an absolute hell of a time eating enough AND i tend to be chronically on the low end of normal for blood sugar, if not fully hypoglycemic. drinking a glass of juice is an easy way to increase calories and nutrients for me, including sugar very much on purpose
as with anything nutrition, the ideal intake of Things varies wildly from person to person, so any hot take of ONLY do xyz is going to be absolute garbage you should never listen to. definitely aim to drink water as you can but DONT feel bad if you cant stand it, just be aware that you have to compensate and supplement your intake in other ways
PSA: i keep seeing posts about staying cool in extreme heat that include advice like "gatorade is bad actually!" and "don't drink fruit juice it'll just dehydrate you!" and neither of these are true!
regarding fruit juice: there's apparently a misconception that Any Sugar At All will dehydrate you, and that's simply not true. yes, sugar will make you pee more when consumed in large amounts, but 1) the natural sugar in fruits won't do this to you 2) great news! a lot of fruit juices exist without any added sugar in them! 3) honestly even having a glass of the fruit juice with added sugar won't completely dehydrate you as long as you're also drinking water throughout the day. if its hot you deserve a cold treat of a drink!!! can't go wrong with fruit juice!!!
regarding gatorade: maybe this isn't an every day drink, but guess what: if it's 110F/40C or hotter outside, and you don't have AC, or you're moving around a lot outside of the AC, and you're sweating buckets: that's when you drink a gatorade.
gatorade exists to replenish all the electrolytes (salt) and glucose (sugar) that you sweat out. YES it is meant for athletes to drink during intensive work outs and not necessarily for people who aren't doing that kind of exercise. BUT GUESS WHAT! when you're sweating buckets because you had to walk to the bus in extreme heat, that's intensive exercise. please feel free to drink a gatorade after that! that's its intended use case!!!!
no: neither of these drinks should be a total replacement for water. but drinking a lot of water and then treating yourself to a fruit juice with lunch is a good idea!!! drinking a gatorade becuase you just had to walk for 20 minutes in the heat is a good idea!!!
Please Stop Spreading Misinformation About Drinks!!! It's fine if you drink things that aren't water!!!! Yes you should probably always be drinking water but drinking something else As Well isn't going to hurt you!!!! okay!!!! its fine!!!!!!
honestly so long as you are consistently getting Any (non-alcoholic) fluids in you, you're doing great!!!!!! okay!!!! i love you stay safe <3
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neckromantics · 1 year ago
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Spoiling Astarion?
Bringing him back little things that remind you of him whenever he stays back at camp just so he knows you're still thinking of him while you're apart.
Astarion being so used to receiving little gifts from your travels that when you arrive back at camp, he's standing by your tent with his palm outstretched just waiting to see what you've brought him this time. The giddy little grin that's plastered on his face when you fork over the shiniest object you could get your paws on. All varying in degrees of monetary value, for sure, but all with a unique story of their own.
A couple of old coins from an ancient crypt. The entrance of which you'd all stumbled upon when Karlach punched a wall of a cave in victory after a particularly tough battle, only to come back with a handful of bones and cobwebs. The look of shock on her face when the entire wall came crumbling down on the group was enough to have you in stitches, entirely too weak from laughter to stand. You laid beneath the rubble for so long that Gale had assumed you developed a concussion and needed rescuing.
The PRETTIEST, crystal goblet that you'd stolen right from under a rich lady's nose under the guise that you were testing her drink for poison. You'd downed her ale in two gulps the second you exited the building. Was in the middle of patting yourself on the back for being oh-so cunning when you nearly fell on your ass. It was a sick, twisted coincidence that her ale did, in fact, turn out to be poisoned. But, at least you had a spare antidote on you that you gulped down before Shadowheart could find you in such a state. (And make fun of you, no doubt.)
A set of handmade jewelry– not stolen this time, if you can believe it. Wyll had pointed out the small shop to you while the two of you were out shopping for supplies. Said something about how it might be a good idea to pick out a new pair of socks since you'd been complaining about how holey yours had become after so much running around. Which was a good idea, truly– but the second you'd set eyes on the shop window, you knew what you wanted. A matching necklace and earring set, lovingly crafted with silver chain, so very delicate. So very understated that one could almost miss it among the rest of the more garish examples that sat alongside. Three, very small, opalescent stones shone so pretty at you beneath the sunlight that you could hardly look away. You would have given the shopkeep your left kidney just to see Astarion wearing them, but thankfully, it wasn't necessary. (You became so feral in your excitement to hear the very reasonable price that you nearly threw your entire gold pouch at the clerk's head and then kissed him on the mouth.)
You're an eager one. Astarion never has to wait– always receives his gifts before you can so much as slip your travel pack off of your shoulders. He goes real quiet for a moment. Has this far away look while gazing down at whatever it is, turning it over in his palm a couple of times to really study it.
The two of you sit together while you go through the rest of the day's spoils, and he listens while you tell him all about how you found today's special little trinket. Insists you spare no details in how you acquired it. (Unless any of those details are boring, dear. Do spare him of those.)
You know that there have to be some things he enjoys more than others. You know that there has to be some things you've given him that he outright dislikes. There have been a few occasions where he'd poked fun at you for bringing back something silly. Like "The roundest pebble you'd ever seen, Astarion, look at it roll!" or "This drawing of the two of you that you'd doodled on a stray sheet of parchment when you couldn't find anything else no matter how hard you tried!". BUT he has never refused anything you've chosen to bring back for him.
He thinks it's rather sweet that you've dedicated yourself to proving you still think of him when he stays behind. Wonders why you are the way that you are. Sort of loves you to death for it. Definitely does NOT invest in a bag of holding for everything once it all begins to stack up.
Definitely doesn't insist on you taking one half of the jewelry set so you always have a little piece of one another on you at all times. That would be ridiculous. (Earrings or necklace, darling?)
Sequel?
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onlyangel4 · 6 months ago
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Hi can i request an smau with just met to love at first sight (maybe summertime fling) with lando based on Wherever u r by umi and V 🥹 happy ending!!
wherever u r. ln4. smau.
lando norris x actress!reader
lando always thought that love at first sight was some cliche created by the movies, something not applicable with real life. but then he met you
faceclaim: madelyn cline
y/ninsta posted a story
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written: emergency leg shave in a hotel sink before going out in monaco that i definitely do not belong at, wish me luck.
y/bff replied to your story: i can't believe you are going to an event alone, your confidence baffles me
y/ninsta: if it makes you feel better i said yes when i was drunk and now that i'm stone cold sober i am shitting my pants
y/ninsta posted a story
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written: two hours later and i am ready
y/nsightings posted a story
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written: y/n spotted outside a club in monaco, there is a massive celebrity event there tonight she told a fan that her plus one dropped out last minute so she is attending alone and is shitting herself, sounds like our y/n
f1updates
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liked by user1, user2, user3 and 54,683 others
f1updates: lando, charles and alex, daniel and heidi have all been spotted outside the same club in monaco. there is an exclusive invite only event taking place. several celebrities have already been spotted entering the club including zendaya, yn l/n, tate mcrae and the kid laroi
view all 7,293 comments
user1: i would sell a kidney to get inside that club
user2: omg this is the event y/n was shaving her legs for
user3: she is so real for that if i knew that i was going to be in a room with f1 drivers i would shave EVERYTHING
user4: the summer break just started and they are already meeting up at a party they are all obsessed with each other
y/nupdates posted a story
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written: y/n spotted leaving the monaco party with an unknown man
y/nfan
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liked by user5, user6, user7 and 34,855 others
y/nfan: guys! so my boyfriend does a lot of work behind the scenes in film and tv so we got invited to this event in monaco. and i spotted y/n standing at the back of the party not really interracting with anyone because she didn't know anyone so i went up to her told her that i was a massive fan and she spent a lot of the night with us. we were dancing and watching lando norris' dj set when he saw her and goes "holy shit that is y/n y/ln shit you are hotter in person" and when his dj set was done he ran off the stage and over to us and we were about to take a selfie so i got this gem. honestly the best night ever.
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user7: could that be who y/n was spotted leaving with
user5: omg that is such a lando thing to do
user6: i would not be mad at this couple
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landonorris posted a private story
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charlesleclerc replied to your story: alex is so mad that she didn't get the chance to meet y/n last night and you guys are just hanging
landonorris: man we are not just hanging, she is like actually perfect
charlesleclerc: oh dear are you what the kids call down bad
landonorris: i will forever hate alex for teaching you that
mclaren: so if you fancied inviting your new "friend" to the dutch gp no one would be mad, especially if she wanted to take part in media day
landonorris: you never miss a trick admin, i'll talk to her
y/ninsta posted a story
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written: beach day
y/ninsta
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liked by landonorris, sabrinacarpenter, alexandrasaintmleux and 1,384,735 others
y/ninsta: monaco trip dump
view all 23,452 comments
sabrinacarpenter: can't wait for you to be back in la
y/ninsta: girl i have so much shit to tell you
alexandrasaintmleux: meeting you was a dream come true, can't wait until we get to hang out again
y/ninsta: love you so much, will have to visit again soon
landonorris: i made the cut !
y/ninsta: that night was too memorable to not include
user8: y/n what do you mean
user9: lando norris wtf is this crossover episode
user10: didn't she go on holiday alone, who took all these pictures
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y/ninsta posted a story
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written: first time on a private jet wtf never flying commercial ever again
landonorris posted a story
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written: and we arrived, so ready for the next part of the season
charlesleclerc replied to your story: if "we" is who i think it is alex is going to lose her mind
landonorris: tell alex her job is to make sure y/n doesn't get lost in the paddock
f1celebs posted a story
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written: actress y/n y/ln has arrived for media day here in the netherlands
y/ninsta posted a story
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written: exciting things coming
mclaren posted a story tagging landonorris and y/ninsta
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written: lando took actress y/n y/ln on a hot lap, click the link here to watch the whole thing
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landonorris
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liked by y/ninsta, alexandrasaintmleux, mclaren and 1,453,621 others
tagged: y/ninsta
landonorris: bring your girlfriend to work day
view all 78,934 comments
y/ninsta: i think you mean "almost kill your girlfriend at work day"
landonorris: babe i was actually going slow
alexandrasaintmleux: no you brought MY girlfriend to work
landonorris: well no...
mclaren: next time we will put y/n behind the wheel
y/ninsta: omg really !
landonorris: that is an awful ideal
user10: he has just beaten the norizz allegations by pulling one of the hottest women in hollywood omg way to prove us wrong
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miaoua3 · 3 months ago
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(pairing: dino x f!reader)
based on that one video of vernon trying the food that dino made and immediately thinking it’s bad when vernon said that it’s chewy oh my baby how i love you
“babe? could you come here for a second?”, chan lets out from the kitchen, his voice sounding unsure and hesitant.
sensing that this is more than just a favour you could do for him, you get up and walk to where he’s standing in front of a stove.
looking at him expectedly, you smile “yes? what is it, love?”.
fidgeting with the spoon for a moment, he then takes a bit of a food from the pot, before he blows on it to cool it down. slowly bringing it to your mouth, he questions “could you try this and tell me how it tastes? i’m not sure if it’s all that up to your tastes.”
you just take ahold of his wrist before bringing the spoon in your mouth, choosing not to respond to his question and instead just do it.
you chew on it for a few seconds, eyebrows furrowing in concentration, trying to identify everything that he put in it.
hm, maybe a bit more salt would be good you think to yourself.
before you even have the time to open your mouth to sound your thoughts out loud, he interrupts you.
“i knew it, it tastes bad right? i’ll just throw it out a-and we can just order something-“.
sensing that he’s spiralling quickly, you immediately bring your hands to his cheeks and turn his head to yourself.
“hey, hey, hey, baby no, that’s not what i was going to say. i just thought that it could use a bit more salt but otherwise everything is fine, it tastes super yummy.”
chan just looks down to his feet that are fidgeting lightly. you look him with eyes full of pain before you move closer, leaning your forehead against his own so his eyes are forced to look at your own again.
“channie, my love, what is this about really? you know you don’t need to stress this much over some food. plus, you know that i would eat anything you’d make for me, because everything you make tastes divine.”
chan’s hands come to fiddle with the hem of your shirt, insecurity very visible on his face. you rub your thumbs against his soft cheeks as you wait for him to answer you.
after a minute, he finally quietly says “i know i’m not the best cook, so i just wanted to make you something as a way to improve my cooking skills, so you wouldn’t have to do it all the time, like you are doing at the moment…and what kind of boyfriend am i when i can’t even make anything that you like?…”.
your eyebrows furrow on their own as he continues to speak, heart breaking at how broken and sad his voice sounds.
deciding that you have heard enough, you bring his big and buff body down to your height, hugging him tightly as a way to reassure him.
you sigh before you start speaking against his ear “oh my love, you have to stop being so hard on yourself, baby. you know you are the best boyfriend there is, especially for me. you do so much for me, that i actually feel like i’m not doing enough for you. you are always there for me, you take care of me both emotionally and physically. i haven’t paid for anything ever since our third date, and you know how that makes me feel. the cooking…it’s the only thing i know i can do to repay you for being my perfect other half and for everything that you do. so it’s really not a problem for me.”, you pause so you can being his face in front of your own again. “you need to start believing me when i say that nobody could take care of me the way that you do, nor that i want them to…you are my soulmate, sweetheart, okay?”, you finish.
chan has to blink his tears away as he nods his head quickly before he hugs you tightly, hiding his face in your hair.
rubbing his back in comfort, you add “plus you shouldn’t be cooking according to my tastes, you know i like my food so salty, it gives me kidney stones.”, as a way to lighten up the mood.
and as he chuckles, you know that you’ve succeeded in doing it.
then again, if that hadn’t work, you would’ve tried another 200 different jokes, just to make him smile again.
because channie should only be smiling and be happy. because it’s what he deserves.
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darkficsyouneveraskedfor · 4 months ago
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Death Wish 4
Warnings: non/dubcon, mentions of crime, violence/abuse and other dark elements. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.
My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.
Character: mob!Bucky Barnes
Part of the mob drabbles au
Summary: you’re desperate for a way out of your life and you ask a powerful man for help (plus!reader)
As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. I’m happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging ❤️
Photo Inspo
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You close the cupboard and nearly jump out of your skin as Adrienne stands on the other side of it. She stares at you soberly before she cracks a sheepish smile. You show your fright with a hand on your chest. 
“Ade,” you huff. 
She laughs, “I’m sorry. Didn’t mean to.” 
“No problem,” you assure her. “What’s up?” 
Her nostrils flare and her smile dulls, “it’s been a week.” 
One week. Your father’s been away for a whole week. He’s rarely been gone that long. His jobs are never more than a couple days. And you haven’t heard from him, but that’s not unusual or disappointing. 
“Hopefully it will be another,” Kitty says as she walks into the kitchen with a half-finished glass of water. “It’s calm around her. Isn’t it?” 
You nod. A silence rises around the three of you. You think back to the one memory you have of a peaceful house. When it was the three of you and your mother. 
“He got that kidney stone,” Kitty says. “Had him in the hospital for days. Ma said it was barely the size of a bead.” 
“Best days of my life,” you agree. 
“I don’t remember,” Adrienne says. 
As the youngest, she doesn’t remember everything and you sometimes think that’s better for her sanity. Even your memory is splotchy. There are fractures of noise and vision. Sometimes you only see, other times it replays like a record on a player and crawls through your ears. 
“So, Ade, why are you so concerned?” Kitty inquires. 
Adrienne hesitates. She shrugs and looks away guiltily. She’s a bad liar. You all are despite the typical consequences. 
“Mitzi wanted to see a movie. They’re screening Breakfast at Tiffany’s at the Golden Reel.” 
“Audrey?” Kitty preens. “My favourite.” 
“You can come. I was going to ask both of you but I thought if daddy came back--” 
“And we’re all gone...” you add. “You two go. I can deal with him.” 
“That’s not fair,” Kitty says. 
“Really, go. I can’t focus on a movie right now.” You insist. “Have some popcorn for me, alright?” 
“He probably won’t be back,” Kitty argues. 
You wave her off, “really, it’s fine. You know I hate crowds. That theatre is tiny and it’ll probably be packed on a Friday night.” 
“Okay, but I’m bringing you back raisinettes. I know you love them.” Kitty insists. 
“Have fun. Tell Mitzi I said hello,” you turn back to the cupboards and run your hands over the laminate.  
You’ve been restless. You clean just to keep yourself busy. To keep from thinking. And when you lay down at night, you’re not kept awake by your usual dread. It isn’t your father standing on your chest, it’s Barnes. In your dreams, he doesn’t strut into the bakery, but into your house. And he sits at the table where your father would usually be and sits silently, waiting. 
That’s why this calm unsettles you. There’s always a storm to come after the quiet. It will unfurl soon enough. 
“Hey, you okay?” Kitty’s gentle touch makes you wince. 
“I’m good,” you assure her and nearly gag on your tongue. For a moment, it wasn’t your voice, it was your mother’s. That same lie she told for so long. You both hesitate at the echo of your lifetimes. “Really,” you face her, “you know I’m dying to have this place to myself. When does that ever happen?” 
She stares at you then smiles. “Yeah, enjoy it while it lasts.” 
She falters again. It’s what you’re all thinking. You want to milk every bit of joy out of your father’s absence.
Kitty turns and grabs Adrienne’s hand, quickly redirecting from the threat of inevitability, “Ade, what are you gonna wear?” 
You take out the flour and all the other ingredients you need. For once, you can afford to spare a bit extra. When you were really young, your mother made her own bread. That stopped shortly after she had Adrienne. She changed after that. She was exhausted with all three of you. 
You measure out every part before you begin. Your precision has always tied you in knots. You find it hard to get anything done unless it’s entirely orderly. In a house full of chaos, that means often you don’t get much done at all. 
As you knead the dough, Kitty and Adrienne’s voices garble on the stairs. They stomp down to the first floor and call a goodbye to you through the doorway. You holler back but keep your hands working. 
You get the loaf in the oven and clean up the mess. The empty house is eerie. You can’t remember the last time you were all alone. Really alone. Ever, if at all. 
You wash the bowls and the whisk and the roller. You put it all away, step-by-step, running through every single detail. The timer counts down, the small windable egg-shaped device your mother always had going for one way or another. Tick, tick, tick. 
It goes off and you jump. For a moment, you’re back in your memories. You’re a little girl at the table, watching your mother rush around the kitchen. Kitty’s beside you with a colouring book and Adrienne’s in her high chair. 
Your mother limps from the fridge to stove. She doesn’t let it deter her. She bends to take out the pan of food as the timer buzzes. Adrienne wails at the noise as you cover your ears. The smell of cigarette smoke singes in your nostrils. 
You twist the timer so it goes silent as you return to the present. The scent of tobacco fades as the fresh baked bread wafts through the kitchen. You open the creaky oven door and use the stained oven mitts to take the pan out. Your mother always wanted a new stove. You assume she wanted a lot of things that she never got. 
You put the pan down and shut off the oven. The doorbell pierces the air and you spin, your back hitting the counter. It wouldn’t be your father; he wouldn’t ring the door. He always comes in screaming, even in the middle of the night. 
You put the oven mitts on the table as you pass and step out into the hall. You near the door, a shadow on the other side of the marbled glass. It’s a man. Your heartbeat spikes. Your father is a criminal and a strange man knocking at your door could be dangerous. 
Is death so bad when living is terrifying? 
You open the door. A wash of deja vu flows over you. It isn’t a strange man, it’s Steve Rogers. Again. That doesn’t ease your worries. 
“You. Come.” He orders you. 
You hold your breath. That is unusual. Your father’s associates come and go, most times they barely acknowledge you, they’re just there to talk shit with him or drag him off on some caper. This is different. Different is dangerous. 
“Yeah, you,” he snaps his fingers. “Look, I don’t got all day. Let’s go.” 
You look down. “My shoes...” 
“Get ‘em,” he sighs and crosses his arms. 
You step back and leave the door open. You step into a pair of scuffed flats and turn back to him. You don’t even grab your keys as you step outside. You’re shaking. 
“Is it my father?” You ask. 
“No questions.” He snarls as he turns and marches down the narrow walkway. 
You follow him at a bouncing pace, struggling to keep up with him. He leads you to the car and opens the back door. It’s then that you notice the woman in his front seat. Her eyes are skittish as she peers back out at you. 
“Get in,” he opens the door. “And be quiet.” 
You put your head down and obey. The look on that woman’s face is enough to keep you in line. Besides, your father prepared you well. There’s an order to things and you’re at the very bottom. So keep your mouth shut and do what you’re told. 
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opennwindows · 1 year ago
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If you can, could I request BEN Drowned fluff / smut headcanons like about himself, with his headcanon age, hobbies, facts, what he is into or would like & want in a relationship, and what he would be like with a gamer girlfriend/ s/o?
If ya taking requests rn still?✨😇😊💖
Ben Drowned general + NSFW hcs
A/N: yes!! absolutely. i love getting to talk about how the pastas do their pastaing in my mind. i have so many headcanons for everyone that im excited to share!! also sorry i forgot to include the gamer gf part but i don't think it would change a lot of what i wrote!!
btw sorry for fucking dying i have been busy 😭😭 but no one worry i will still continue to work on requests!! if anyone has any marble hornets stuff they wanna request i will zoom you to the front of the queue so fucking quick. anyways enough of me yapping.
cw: 18+ nsfw, toxic relationships, crying kink,
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GENERAL
ben is mentally and physically 22, but he can be quite emotionally immature at times. when he died he never stopped growing and maturing, his soul was just stuck in limbo. think like the worst waiting room ever.
he's surprisingly tall, standing at about 5'9. he's lanky but not bone thin. could easily get pretty far in a fight without his ghost powers.
the link costume only appears when he’s in his ghost form. so for example, when he’s messing with someone on their computer he’ll appear as the canon BEN we’re most familiar with. when he’s just chilling in his physical body, he mostly wears beat up hoodies and sweatpants.
contrary to popular belief, ben's not the hardcore gamer everyone thinks he is. sure, he'll play some overwatch or whatever when he's bored but he honestly just prefers to watch tv and browse the internet. understandably REFUSES to play any zelda games. if you were trapped in a video game for decades would you ever wanna touch it again? exactly.
ben loves to draw little comics and troll (see: horrifically traumatize) people online. god forbid you get into twitter beef with this man because he will crawl through your monitor at 3am and leave you with a crippling fear of technology. dude thinks it's absolutely hilarious. a true knee slapper.
lowkey has a sugar addiction. will slam down 4 cans of pepsi in one sitting. he's very lucky that he's basically a ghost because the kidney stones would be plentiful.
ROMANTIC
you know that guy with the blown out speakers in his car, lives off of energy drinks and burnt blue razz ice elfbars, swears aphex twin is the modern mozart and works on the grill at your local wendy’s? yeah thats ben. or at least would be him if he was still human.
“why would you need a chair, my lap is literally right here babe.”
would absolutely wear your skin if given the opportunity. not in a weird way. he’s just EXTREMELY touchy.
he needs someone who is significantly more organized and motivated than him. he can go almost a week without showering and it should honestly be considered biological warfare when he tries to smother you with affection during these episodes.
after awhile of you guys dating he LOVES the idea of y’all showering together. he has a fear of water and while showers aren’t too much of a trigger, your presence helps ease his anxiety.
favorite pet names: bro, dude, dawg, babe, bitch (non derogatory)
not really a romantic but he tries his best. a perfect date for him is just getting some takeout, watching youtube, talking about stupid shit and play fighting. if you want something more traditional or extravagant then he’ll oblige to make you happy but those types of dates make him feel quite suffocated and nervous. try to save those for special occasions.
now let’s talk about his problems because just like the other creeps he is ANGSTY.
he’s probably the most emotionally stable and healthiest of the group but he definitely still has his toxic traits, after all this man is a ghost that mentally tortures and kills his victims through manipulation.
ben would never ever get physical with his partner no matter how enraged he is but he absolutely is the type to do some mental damage when he gets carried away. ben drowned? more like ben gaslighted.
the type to say some shit that would keep you up for years and then kiss you the next morning like the argument never happened. he finds it easier to ignore problems than to actively talk and fix them. you’re gonna have to teach him some important communication skills or else you’ll grow to resent him after all the bottled up rage.
a bit too brutally honest and blunt for his own good so if you have thin skin the relationship would fall apart pretty quickly. he wants someone who can drag him twice as hard as he dragged you. bonus points if your insults are consistently funny as hell.
please watch anime with him and discuss it. he would propose on the spot, especially if you play with his hair.
pro player tip: if you want him to clean his disgusting room, help him and make it fun! he just needs a little push and motivation at times. and being around you makes him want to get his shit together.
big fan of late night make-out sessions. i’m talking like 45 minutes straight of just slobbering on each other’s faces with tongues down throats. if you don’t want his hands running over every inch of your body then you’ll probably have to chain him to the wall.
NSFW
okay. so he’s a little inexperienced with his hands. he’s just a slow learner. be vocal with him about what you like!!
ben's about 7inches and slightly skinnier than average but he will have you seeing stars in record time. the dick game is no joke. he tends to go fast and deep most times.
i can see him being a switch in the idgaf-as-long-as-i’m-fucking way. dude will go with the flow and will try mostly anything.
definitely one of the least aggressive pastas during sex. he has sadistic tendencies but he’s more of a edge/overstimulate you until you cry versus a beat the shit out of you and rip hair out of your scalp type. he’s pretty vanilla given his occupation.
despite his love of roasting the fuck out of you on a daily basis, the only words that come out of this man’s mouth is heavenly praise. he looks at you like you’re the most gorgeous being on the planet and he’ll let you know it.
he loves to whisper praises into your ear while you ride him.
he's more of a receiver than a giver when it comes to oral. he'll absolutely spend hours between your legs if given the chance but nothing beats the sight of you on your knees and teary eyed with his length in your mouth.
he can be a bit of a head pusher but just let him face-fuck you every now and then, hearing his loud moans will be worth it.
did i mention how much of a crying kink this man has? you guys could be on round three and if he stares at your teary eyed fucked-out face for longer than 10 seconds he'll immediately get hard again. you'll have to beg him to give your poor body a break.
he's also into choking but only if he's the one doing it. if you try to restrict his breathing he'll panic and the mood would get ruined.
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mister-001 · 5 months ago
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POISON
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Conteúdo —Yandere platônico Batfamily x Leitor adolescente
Sinopse — Days pass and there's no news about you, but nothing stays hidden for long and now they know your location, but the worst part is you don't remember them, and they'd rather it stay that way forever
Warning: mentions of violence, murder, mentions of torture, violence, mentions of drugs, Reader is a girl, manipulation, violence against minors, torture, Cigarette use, negligence, joker being the joker, Yandere behavior, defined gender, blood.
chapters: 01
A/N: welcome little lamb, be very careful with your choices, they can bring you bad luck depending on which one you choose, good luck, take care of yourself little lamb, your health comes first!!
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The dark path is not always the bad path...
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Words cause more pain than physical injuries...
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HE didn't sleep well, the dark circles under his eyes gave him away
His fingers touching the keys while his eyes never left the screen in front of him.
A little bird will never be free if its destiny is to be trapped in a cage...
Jason was frustrated, the whole way he couldn't find even a clue about his little sister
A sigh escaped his lips as he looked at the dead body on the floor.
Somentimes, a stone in the road is better than one in the kidney...
He finally found it, Tim finally found the right location, but there was just one problem...
It's the same location where Joker is...
Death cannot be avoided, you can run away, but you cannot hide forever...
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Jason didn't wait when Tim said he discovered his little sister's location, he didn't even want to hear the rest, he just ran straight to the location
He doesn't want history to repeat itself, he doesn't want his sister to suffer what he suffered
He should have listened when they said to wait...
Batman stood on the balcony of a building while observing the location of the place he was given, honestly, was it a decent place?
He doesn't know, he just knows that this is exactly where his daughter is
And he won't leave until his daughter is with him, even if he has to get his hands dirty...
a heart has to be sacrificed...
It was dark, but his eyes moved around, looking around
His eyes stopped on a common person
— "sister?, is it really you?..."
Jason says as he looks at the girl in front of him, the girl's eyes moved and looked straight into his as they made eye contact, that was enough for him to truly know it was her
He sighed and quickly approached her, but his feet stopped when the tip of a katana was pointed at his neck, he was surprised and looked at the tip of the katana, before looking into her eyes.
— "bunny you-... What are you doing?..."
He says confused as he tries to smile, but his smile disappears when he hears clapping noises.
— "oh~ extraordinary, it was a wonderful show I must admit"
Jason's expression became serious when he heard that voice, and he looked at the person
— "Joker..."
— "well, I see you've already met my little masterpiece, but let me introduce you, this is my daughter, my little pride"
Joker says as he laughs, standing next to him looking at Jason
Jason looks at Joker in shock before looking at you noticing his eyes without the sparkle they used to have.
— "what did you do with her?!"
Jason says making Joker laugh even harder, Joker smiles amusedly and strokes his hair
— "well, me?, I didn't do anything, I feel offended now"
Joker says and laughs when you move his hand away from your hair, Jason wouldn't admit it but envy blinds him and he doesn't ask for a second to attack Joker while trying not to hurt you
Revenge is a dish best served cold...
Joker laughs before a pop is heard as he falls to the ground unconscious.
Damien drops the bat on the ground and looks at Joker's body on the ground, he sighs as Jason looks at him in surprise, Damien looks at him and sighs
— "what?, I did what everyone wanted to do, be thankful I just left him unconscious, it's better than letting you kill him"
Damien says as he walks past Jason, leaving him standing still and Jason sighs.
'Little Demon'
Jason thinks as he crosses his arms and rolls his eyes before looking at Joker's body on the floor.
You looked at Jason and Joker fighting and you notice someone approaching Joker, just as you were about to protect Joker, your vision went black and you fell unconscious, before you could fall to the ground someone was already holding you.
Batman held her unconscious body as he removed the needle from her neck and handed it to Dick
— "ready little bat, daddy is here now, there's no need to be scared, daddy will give you whatever you want, except your freedom, Gotham is a dangerous place, you will be safe with your family..."
His voice rings out as he rocks his unconscious body like he's rocking a baby
Sometimes, the kindest people have a double face, there is always a dark side behind all the kindness...
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A sigh was heard when he heard everything, he finally let out the breath he didn't even know he was holding,
Tim was silent as he looked at the screens
He did it, he will finally be able to see his little sister again
With no one in the way, perfect
'Don't worry little sister, now no one can take you away from us again, no one can take you away from me again...'
A bat won't be able to come out of the darkness if the sun bothers it so much...
Alfred looked at the finished room, the room was next to Bruce's room, he didn't want that to happen, but he also didn't want you to be in danger in Gotham, after all, it's Gotham, every time you left, he felt worried, now he doesn't need to worry anymore, when he went to your room and saw it empty he felt devastated with worry, little did you know what awaited you in Gotham, the dark sides, without protection, you could be in danger,
But when he found out that Bruce made it he was relieved, his room was already prepared, now all that's left is for Bruce to bring you
A butler knows more than you think...
A big smile was on Duke's face as he shopped for accessories, books, and various other things.
He was on a mission when he found out about her disappearance and was more than frustrated as he took out all his frustration on the poor bandits.
But when he knew they found you he was relieved and happy
He didn't wait a second to buy you a bunch of stuff, you love that new movie that's coming out right?, Jurassic World, the new one, he knows it's horror and rated R, but he would do anything for you
So he will let you watch with him hidden from Bruce, he is eager to return to Gotham and shower you with affection and hugs
No treasure will overshadow you...
Cassandra sighed and picked up another bracelet, she already picked up several matching accessories, you and she will have everything matching like united sisters
She won't accept a no or a maybe
It will give you a life far from the life of a vigilante and a hero, a normal life is healthy
death is something that not everyone is afraid of, on the contrary, they are afraid of pain...
Barbara was simply decorating her room, she was more than eager to see you again, after days of slowly going crazy just for not hearing any news about you,
She was terrified when she found out you were with Joker,
He's not a nice guy
And you don't need it, you have it... Just it...
The quietest people don't always want to be noticed...
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Damien approached Batman with you unconscious in Batman's arm, he stopped in front of Batman and stroked his hair softly while muttering inaudible words
Dick watched everything with a smile before he heard a noise and he fell to the ground when something hit him in the head,
Everyone was alarmed as they quickly positioned themselves ready to fight while Batman placed you near a wall and prepared to fight the person.
Dick touched his head slowly and looked at his hand seeing blood, he stood up and looked back while looking at the person with serious looks
— "Well, well, how stupid of you to do all this nonsense and not invite me, I thought my little puddin was stupid, but then I realized that you are lower than that"
The person says while holding the bat in their hand and smiling while looking at them
— "and you were trying to take my daughter from me, what an evil thing Batman, trying to take a daughter from a mother..."
The person says while pronouncing Batman with venom and disgust, her eyes look at each of them before she laughs
She sighs and smiles
— "Harley"
Batman says as the woman smiles amusedly and swings the bat playfully
— "Bat, kidnapping my daughter is a low blow"
Harley says smiling, but she wasn't exactly amused
— "She is not your daughter"
Batman says seriously while looking at her
— "Much less yours"
Harley says while smiling and laughing in fun
Batman looks at her seriously and Harley smiles amusedly
— "I've had it much longer than you"
— "well, I don't think I need to talk about how terrible you are as a father, if you left her walking around alone it's definitely because it was stupid,
At least I did a better job of being a mother than you were of being her father."
Harley says as she smiles and looks at Batman amusedly as Batman looks into her eyes seriously, everything goes silent for a moment
— "I just want my daughter"
Harley says with a smile on her lips before Batman sighs
— "so we have something in common, but mend your words, you want my daughter"
Batman says while Harley smiles and laughs in amusement
Damien sighs in frustration as Jason looks between Batman and Harley, Dick remains silent, confused by the situation, but understanding the mood.
— "Well, let's see who will take her then..."
Harley says while smiling amusedly and Batman looks into her eyes seriously
Damien remains silent, frustrated with the situation while making a small face of disgust.
'She is not an object to be won, she is a human like everyone else, they should treat her as a person, not as a trophy to be won, disgusting'
Jason crosses his arms and rolls his eyes.
'I don't fight with women'
Jason thinks while staying silent
Dick stands next to Jason as he sighs and thinks the same thing as Jason
Harley swings the baton and prepares to fight as Batman does the same
The two make eye contact, watching each other's movements.
Watching who will move first
Who will make the first mistake
Life is made of mistakes and they all kill you if you're not smart enough...
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A/N: hi! Little lambs, I hope you liked it, that's it for now, I'm going to do part three, but I ask you to be patient, my imagination is big, but I also have to take care of my health too, sorry for the delay, I get distracted when I take it medicine, and I had things to take care of, but I was anxious and couldn't wait to post, now I'm going to get some rest, I really hope you enjoyed it, Take care of yourself little lamb, your health comes first!!.
Signed: 𝙇𝙖𝙮...
Marcador : @bellethesleepypotato @peptox @lilithskywalker @welpthisisboring @vanessa-boo @toasted-cat18 @cooki3dough @caged-birdies-blog @marsmabe @dhanyasri @trashpanda0000 @gabbiegabbie24
Betrayal comes from those we least expect...
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