#what ppl might think from seeing my profile page

[antea21]

What can you tell about me as a genshin player from this two screen shots

[jakowskis]

torchwood fanfic resources

so i'm a chronic livejournal archaeologist, and fixating on 2000s media is particularly fun for me because it means i get to go digging on lj / dw / old fanfic forums. below you'll find some of the excavations from my torchwood fixation (give it up for month 6!) it's pretty much got every comm i've ever stumbled upon and found useful, or thought others would find useful. it's largely fanfic-oriented, though there's some more generalized comms, too. i hope you guys enjoy!

i was originally going to include a link to my reclist on this post as well, but it's still a wip, so i'll just post that separately in the future.

general disclaimer: most of the content here is from 2006-2013 or so. period-typical attitudes may pop up in places. i'm not sure if most modern tw fans have witnessed the original fandom at all, but i felt a need to say this anyway, because i've seen some icky stuff. i've warned for anything notable. gwen bashing in particular may unfortunately pop up in some of these comms, especially in the comments, so tread carefully.

if you're new to probing through old lj comms, remember to always have the wayback machine on hand, because you're going to run into a lot of purged accounts and seemingly lost fics, but sometimes you get lucky and something's been archived :)

as of the date i'm posting this, all of these comms are still accessible, but if you're from the future and some have been deleted, again, go ahead and give the wayback machine a try. additionally, livejournal has a system that includes 'cross-posting' in which, if authors choose to (and the majority of them do, to get their fics more visibility), fics get posted to multiple comms at once. so chances are, even if one comm gets deleted, the contents will survive through other comms. kind of like how reblogs continue to exist even when the original blog is deleted.

finally, ctrl + f is your best friend if you have a specific ship/character/trope you're invested in, especially in comms with less than ideal tagging systems. if a comm does have a substantial tagging system, you can find all of its tags by adding '/tags' the end of the urls i've provided.

ok... let's begin :-)

assorted livejournal communities

✎ torch-wood: this is essentially a torchwood subreddit. it started before the show even aired, and one of the highlights of it is episode reaction posts (easily accessible on the right side of the lj) that document how everyone immediately reacted to the eps, which is pretty damn cool, fandom-history wise. only thing i should mention is there's quite a lot of gwen and owen bashing in the comments of some of those reaction posts, so just be wary of that if you love those two like i do, 'cuz it's a bit of a bummer.

✎ torchwood-three: this comm is an extremely cool then-daily newsletter (that still updates sometimes?!) that compiled as much fan-content as it could find into cleanly organized lists. the posts made immediately after new episodes aired contain reactions, discussions, meta, theories, new fic, fanmixes, just about everything. very very cool to go back and see the way the fandom was thinking as the show was airing and as they were getting to know the characters. here's a direct link to all posts made in late 2006, during the airing of s1.

✎ torchwood-fic: exactly what it says on the tin. desktop layout is easy to navigate, tags are all there!

✎ torchwood-fic's profile page also features a list of affiliated accounts that's pretty handy. it's worth taking a peek at, in case i've excluded anything in this post that you might be interested in.

✎ twgenrefinders: handy dandy comm where people would ask for fics of a certain variety & be treated with reclists, or hyper-specific fics... pretty cool stuff, ive got several threads bookmarked to sort through the links later. ofc, please note that some of the things people asked for might be stinky. particularly i've seen a lot of ppl requesting gwen bashing fics :/

✎ twstoryfinder: cousin to the above comm; here, people would ask for a very specific fic they'd lost. it's kind of fun to find fics through because you get someone describing memorable scenes + hyping it up, so it's different than just a standard summary. this one still gets posted on, too, which is crazyyy.

✎ tw-unpaired: for gen fics! no romance allowed! there's some good character studies + friendship fics in there. stuff's tagged by character + authors are even tagged, in case you find one whose writing you particularly enjoy. this is v useful for when someone's main journal has been deleted.

✎ torchwood-decaf: a comm where janto is BANNED. nah i'm kidding, it's not anti-janto, it was just made because janto is so huge that it overshadows everything else. pretty smart, tbh; wading through the sheer mass of janto content can be tiresome.

✎ jack-in-cuffs: for dark tw fic, or uber smutty tw fic. as a fan of dark!fic, there's some goodies in here, but of course it's not everyone's cup of tea. most of the writers included warnings, but if you go a little further back, some people weren't as courteous; navigate with caution.

✎ jack-owen: for fic featuring our captain and his (second favorite) doctor. i know this pairing's kinda divisive nowadays, but i enjoy it a lot. the comm's got a dismal tagging system and, ngl, i don't truly like any of the fics there (i'm very intrigued by jack and owen's relationship but i've never found fic that really does them justice, and i still haven't figured out how to write them myself) - but i'll include it anyway.

✎ odetojoi: for fic featuring owen in the middle of a janto sandwich, for those of us who are allergic to women (/sarcasm). there's an oddly impressive supply of fics of the three of them, and a good chunk of them can be found in this comm. (everytime i see this comm i think of a certain abbreviation found in p/rnogr/phy... but i digress)

✎ halfwee-and-tea: for ianto x owen fic. haven't gone through this one much, truthfully. i hate when comms have no tagging systems agh.

✎ owenharper-fans: a comm for the saddest undeadest bisexualest doctor around. also features a few burn appreciation posts, which is nice to see pre-pac rim era. mostly just features a shit ton of owen fic, particularly owen x ianto fic. mostly sufficiently tagged. if you need me once i post this, btw, i will be balls deep in this comm.

✎ the pro-owen alliance: another owen-focused comm - i think this one was made directly in response to owen bashing. haven't combed through this one much but it's got a fair amount of fics.

✎ house-of-cooper: a gwen comm! made in response to gwen bashing. haven't gone through it, but i'm glad it exists.

✎ torchwoodcoffee: ianto comm! this one's hugeee. the majority of it's janto, but the pairings aren't tagged, which is really frustrating. about 6k fics on there, though! just untagged. fff.

✎ tw-femficfest: a comm for fic about any and all of the torchwood ladies. tagging's cleanly done & there's some handy fic round ups, too.

✎ tw-femslash: yuri!!! wahoo!!! a comm for f/f tw ships. there's quite a lot of fic on here, but unfortunately there's no tagging whatsoever. sigh.

✎ tw-classic: a comm for 'all things series one and two of torchwood'. was made after s3 and was popular around s4 out of nostalgia for the golden age <3 good amount of fic, discussions, etc.

✎ torchwood-house: this comm is, like, letterboxd, but for torchwood fanfic. basically a group of individuals who thought of themselves as having Good Taste would read Good Fic and then go in this comm and write a post about why they recommend it. it's well-made, easy to scroll through, and sells the fics v well, and it kinda gets you more excited to read them when you get to see someone hype them up with Fancy Words. it's like a little torchwood yaoi bookclub. we're eating quiche

✎ tw100: a drabble challenge; this thing's full of 100 word drabbles. ngl i hate drabbles but i'm throwing it in here anyway

✎ touchyerwood: i love kink memes... i love kink memes less when my favorite character/pairing is unpopular. the pac rim kink meme's been a blessing bc i'm a basic ass newmann - the torchwood kink meme? not so much. it's got a fair amount of shit, though, so maybe someone else will appreciate it. this one isn't the original, that one's been wiped off the internet, to my chagrin. keep in mind before digging that people in kink memes are horny & gross. that's your warning.

✎ reel-torchwood: for any and all movie aus... ok i have a bone to pick with this comm. i'm a big movie nerd, i love film, i've seen dozens of films i've thought would make good aus - i combed through this and there is not a SINGLE fic in there that piqued my interest. NOTHING. needless to say my disappointment is immeasurable and my day is ruined. i'm sure my experiences aren't universal though.

✎ torchwoodslash: ah, remember when we called it slash? gee whiz. i'm not big on this comm, it's not very user friendly + there's like no tags whatsoever so it's extremely hard to navigate. enter at your own risk & good luck, lol.

✎ rounds-of-kink: this isn't a torchwood-exclusive comm, but it's got a sizeable torchwood tag, which can be found here. pretty organized tagging system; makes me happy.

✎ tw-declassified: this comm was mainly used for running a 'torchwood bingo', which, i've been in other fandoms that do episode bingos and it's usually cute... this one confused me a little so i didn't bother peeking around too much, but still a cool little bit of fandom history.

✎ writerinadrawer: this was an annual torchwood writer's challenge that ran for four years... it's kinda hard to navigate but it does have some fic in it so i'm putting it here.

✎ dmarley-recs: a recs journal someone ran for compiling torchwood fic; it's got a l o t of recs on there, largely jack/ianto.

ok and straying from lj briefly for two other places to find fic...

✎ kink_bingo: this is a dreamwidth comm, and it's not torchwood-exclusive, so i've linked straight to the torchwood tag. this comm has a livejournal equivalent, but for some reason the tw tag is pretty barren on that one? not sure why. but on dw it's got a fair amount. the tagging system is rough, it tags fandom and kink but not pairing, which is irritating, and every post is hidden under a cut AND makes you go through a discretion barrier every single time (but probably only if you don't have an account? i'm not logged in) which makes navigation a pain. but i dunno, more smut, if you want it.

✎ whofic.com: this site is for doctor who fic, but it's got a very substantial amount of torchwood fic. i do not, however, like the formatting at all. i'm being overly nice; i HATE the formatting. it's very reminiscent of fanfic dot net but, like, worse. it reminds me of adultfanfiction dot org which was a NIGHTMARE to use. but! there is torchwood fic there so it's going in here.

aaaand there we go! that's all i have. i hope these prove handy! enjoy :D

[captainaikus]

Hi hi!!

I started a writing blog (@r3nsukes)

What would your advice be for amateur me?

I really enjoy writing but it feels forced and ugly...

Hi doll ૮꒰ ˶• ༝ •˶꒱ა congrats on starting the new writing blog :p

Advice : Blog structure don't stress too much abt it cause everyone finds their theme n setup eventually, i think the nanase profile is very cute <3 Writing wise : 1. Don't stress it. Like seriously don't - cause if you force yourself to write, it won't turn out well. It's okay if a fic doesn't get out on time, it's okay if you lose followers because of it and its okay to take it at your own pace. I know that when I was writing my yandere rin fic, it took a lot of time. I lost followers since they couldn't get it when they wanted, but I honestly didn't care cause it is my fic and i will take how much ever time i want with it. 2. Tumblr tends to have a lot of escalating discourses - mostly people pointing out that you're writing about "minors." ik it got really bad with the boku no hero fandom Cause of this it's important to write the character's age in the start of the fic so that people can associate with it more. Especially the case where you write nsfw. Tags aren't enough so write what the fic contains at the start like i use tags such as : nsfw, dark content or contains sexual content - etc. so that people know what they are reading 3. Researching about a topic before you decide to write it. Research is extremely important as it can point out what you're working with and details to elaborate your story. 4. If you're new to writing and don't know what to do first, try taking requests or asking people what they want to see you write - its a good phase to push your writing n experiment with your writing style. Tumblr has a separate blog page for writing prompts and is pretty popular among authors who don't know what to write. but basic key is to not force it, cause writing from inspiration and writing from pressure really reflects when you're reading your work.

go heavy with the tags - you can fit upto 30 of them. since you're a new writer, it might take some time for it show up in the tagged work - since i write on ao3 n not tumblr except for asks or games, another thing you should take care of is the spam liking. cause that can get your blog shadow-banned ; i.e. not turn up in the tags (personally i got frustrated cause of hate n ppl reporting my works) but apart from that, I think i got most of it. I hope this helps n i wish you luck with your writings n your new blog :) feel free to ask if you need anything else okay? <3

[iatrophilosophos]

Never accept cashiers checks, they are ALWAYS chargeback scams (nobody uses cashiers checks for real but when you're very new and fronting to more experience clients it gets weird, that's where the scams come in)

Don't sext/chat explicitly with FS clients before seeing them; flirt a little but get the deets hammered out fast

Legit clients RARELY send unsolicited pics, esp not hunky shirtless pics--I've had hunky real clients, but people who are serious about paying for your time aren't gonna try to wow you with how hot they are. You don't need to get your rocks off pretending to be hot shit if you actually intend to pay for that hot shit. (you might trade selfies for verification purposes, the point of these is that they're normal, cute but not professional/edited shots that aren't from a website or social media profile). Reverse image search pics of clients.

SET YOUR AGE OLDER if you are 18-22. It's not actually a draw for real clients, ppl can and do feel like they're being creepy about it and not engage, it just draws way more scam attention (I was constantly getting hassled being honest abt my age at the beginning of my career; towards the end I just put 24 and suddenly got way less timewasters)

The biggest scam in independent porn is, unfortunately, other content creators.

ESPECIALLY since the expected quality and general availability of online porn has skyrocketed in the past several years, it's really hard to make a living making content online. Most people who are successful now either 1) started back in the days of independent sites and were less beholden to algorithms while building their brands, or 2) had existing fame as influencers/streamers or just popular #hotgirl Twitter personalities, and thus already had a reach of hundreds of thousands of viewers who were thirsty for more parasocial engagement. Unless you're already famous, got real lucky, or are offering something that truly isn't available for free elsewhere (e.g. specific kink content, which is gonna require equipment, space etc that you might not have if you're just broke and need a gig), you're not gonna make big money. So, people get into the game, quickly realize this, and go pyramid scheme with it: they lie about how much they make and how good they are at working the algorithm and start offering paid RT groups, page management services, and that kind of thing. These will boost your metrics! They just won't get you actual individual clients buying custom content or sexting sessions etc (where the actual money is if you arent popular) bc your entire platform will be *other* content creators in the promotion ring. It's not a terrible idea to join some FREE groups and network to get work friends who will gas your content but like, watch ur fuckin back.

Don't buy into the kayfabe. People lie about what they make in public for the image, and/or if you're fat, disabled, etc Skinny Hot Bitches will give well meaning but honestly dogshit advice that they never considered applies to ppl with less body privilege. This is honestly worse in shared demographics, like fat ppl with more conventionally attractive curves not realizing the gap between that and fat w/ different shapes or scars (maybe this is out of my lane but I've witnessed trans girls in particular doing this to eachother, I think a lot of esp skinny, pale, non-scarred etc girls w big dysphoria don't necessarily realize how big a gap in conventional attractiveness there can be).

Flopping isn't about you or your personal worth. Entertainment industries are brutal: make yourself a character to play and separate your brand as A CHARACTER from your identity, personality, actual values, friends/social circle etc. so when you do have to take a hard look at what you're doing and why it isn't working, which you WILL have to do, you can do that to a made up person and not internalize nasty lessons about your own self.

Somewhere in the discourse of reducing stigma for sex work we've landed on covering up some nasty shit about the industry. Sex work IS real work: it's a shitty customer service job without guaranteed hours, pay, or a manager to shove annoying custies off on. Most sex workers are not classy bombshells getting flown to Dubai, they're people doing a side gig that kinda sucks; in the same way most actors aren't celebrities on the red carpet, they're working class people struggling contract to contract on bit parts, background work, and commercials.

If you have good improv skills, phone sex is honestly a better bet than doing porn! It's a lot more talking to people but it's a guaranteed rate per minute instead of making a bunch of content and seeing if it flops or not. If you've never done anything like it, it could be worth it to find a worker in a similar niche than the one you're interested and pay for a call to see what their technique and vibe is like. Marketing as a submissive is a little harder/gets fewer clients but is a lot easier work IMO because you basically just have to do folly and make noises while the client tells you fantasies, domming can be more interesting but requires more people skills.

To younger broke adults getting into sex work here’s some common scams:

“I’ll pay you $ every week for feet/genital/fetish pics” they start a long conversation about this. Then they convince you to send some sample pics. They will try to get you to enact their fetishes with promise of later payment. Then they cut and run. They will be kind, promise large things, but become aggressive when you refuse. Lesson: never give things for free unless you’re specifically doing it for marketing. Personalized fetish content should require payment upfront.

“I want to be your sugar mommy/daddy” These are insanely common and will use a variety of tactics. They prey on vulnerable broke people who are desperate for stable cash. They may try to use a BDSM dynamic to make you feel sexy and submissive. They’ll start a long flirty conversation that makes you feel good and desired and confident. Then they might send a link…. Don’t click it! Or they might ask you to “prove your loyalty” as their sub/babygirl/whatever. Proving your loyalty will probably involve sending them money in some way. The most common way is to buy a gift card and tell them the code. If a stranger ever asks you to buy them a gift card that’s pretty much always an instant block.

The same thing goes for “pay pigs”. There are very few people out there actually into financial domination. Chances are people promising you access to their bank accounts are liars trying to get dommed by a stranger, or scammers trying to get money from you.

There’s essentially two main categories of scams in sex work: 1. Traditional scams (trying to get money, personal info, account access) and 2. Freebie scams (trying to get your SW content for free)

Freebie scams can involve someone trying to piss you off so you curse them out and they can go jerk it to being rejected by someone hot. You can just block people being weird.

As a new or established SWer you literally don’t owe anyone anything unless they’ve specifically paid for a service you offer.

[kiyeons]

° ☾  navi · bio · stats · moodboard · plots ☄

now joining the infinite k-tour is nam kiyeon! the 23 year old is onboard as the stylist of the group braveheart. don’t he/they kind of look like jung wooyoung?

hi everyone! i’m noir (they/them, 18+) but you can also call me any other name you might know me by hehe. i’ve been getting overwhelmed easily lately, so i’m v sorry if i’m slow to respond, but pls do like this post if you’d like me to reach out to you for plots/hellos and i will :D! below the cut u can find an intro to my little metal horror meow meow ☼

+ bio

younger of two kids, idolizes his sister kieun who’s three years older. when their parents separated, she basically gave up her own dreams of studying art to hold the family together, and kiyeon’s never stopped feeling indebted to her since. now he just wants to make sure that everything she sacrificed isn’t wasted on him

has an associate’s degree in cosmetology and would’ve liked to do more, but his parents were paying for school and they weren’t exactly big fans of his dreams -_- it sufficed tho

joined braveheart’s creative team in late 2018. he never thought he’d work for this industry but someone inspired him that year to go for it (which is an open connection if anyone’s interested!)

wanted to go into special effects makeup and wardrobe, but he’s gotten rly fond of braveheart and working for them over the last four years, so he’s happy to stay for now and maintain his hobbies on the side :I

+ profile

have u ever tried to scream into a bottle or a mason jar. that’s basically kiyeon’s vibe

saw his first horror movie at 13 and it consumed his entire personality, rip. he finds them therapeutic to watch and scream with

loves believing in all kinds of things like magic and the supernatural and monsters and crystals and love. honestly he’s kind of gullible for it, but he thinks it’s fun, so if you have definitive proof that mothra doesn’t exist then he doesn’t want 2 see it

both a hopeless romantic & horror enthusiast and loves blurring them together

it definitely bleeds into his styling choices too, though a lot of his ideas probs get shot down by management because they’re a little ?%?%?. by now, he’s gotten a good handle of what the mainstream “standard” is, but he’s always Yearning to push the boundaries a little. u can see more about the stuff he likes and is inspired by here!

pretty tame and relaxed to be around, but when it comes to work, he’s StressStressStressStress

he has a lil youtube channel on the side called THE_HORROR! he gives lil tips & tricks on special effects makeup and how he molds his own prosthetics. he also gives people horror-inspired makeovers, and that ranges from beauty makeup to turning your muse into the swamp monster. he has like 209 subscribers, it’s getting p serious.

likes maintaining his privacy, so he’s as vague about his real job as he can be. occasionally he gets a guest that raises a few eyebrows but he’s always just like Well I guess I’m just lucky! and he comes off ditzy enough that ppl believe it lmao

he’s pretty similar irl, kind of quiet with a dash of organized chaos. will say things that sound wise or mysterious but there is always a ninety percent chance he doesn’t know wtf he’s talking about either.

+ plots - more developed stuff here, but quick ideas: 

you can see his plots page for a lil more on this, but basically someone from a group who his older sister rly, rly likes and wants, like, signed merch from. kiyeon would do anything for her, but he feels %%%% about just asking your muse for it, so lately he’s been trying to learn more about your muse/their music so he doesn’t look like a poser 😭

fellow horror movie junkies pls. maybe someone who doesn’t really like going out that often either but they also don’t want to just stare at the hotel walls, so instead they scare each other shitless w/ various horror movies in their downtimes LMAO

his favorite muse to style !!

someone who dislikes/hates/vehemently opposes his stylistic choices !!

the (talks a lot) muse to his (listens) :(

an (excuse me!!! he asked for no pickles) dynamic, whether it’s someone helping him grow a spine about things he wants or someone who’s even meeker than him who he’s learning how to speak up for

guests for his youtube channel !! he’ll give your muse a #sick makeover

other content creators to collab with him </3 they could be one of those cute internet friends

someone to make little homemade horror films with

creative rivals >:(

[travis-and-jodi]

Texts & Passages

Travis & Maria ~~~~~~ My smile misses you!

Maria Avila was Travis’ friend from Southern California. She was also part of the PPL playgroup. Both Travis and Maria had profiles listed on MySpace. This is what Travis had to say about Maria on his page: “This little filly is the only valid argument to not put up a big freakin wall at the Mexico border.”

At Christmastime in 2007, Travis makes a trip home to Riverside, California to visit his family for the holidays. Prior to that trip, he gets in touch with Maria to let her know he’s thinking of her.

December 22, 2007

10:55:40 TRAVIS TO MARIA: Thinkin’ of you

11:14:22 TRAVIS: Hmmm I could think of a few things. Well do your clothes have to be on?

11:16:48 TRAVIS: Haha okay a hand job it is

December 24, 2007

06: 12: 32 MARIA: When do I get to see u

06: 24: 50 TRAVIS: Maybe tomorrow.

But the trip came and went, and Travis never got his hand job from Maria. He was pre-occupied at the time with winning back Lisa. Travis and Lisa had been broken up since November, but by December the two were sweet-talking again. And of course, Travis never missed an opportunity to ask for a picture.

December 24, 2007

08:09:24 LISA to TRAVIS: I love you honey, more and more each day. Thanks for being so good to me. I’ll talk to you in the morning.

08:12:40 TRAVIS: I love you too sweetheart. I know sometimes I talk to much, I hope you find value in it. Sleep well and ill talk to you on the morrow

22:54:18 TRAVIS: Send me a closer picture of you so I have something to look at

22:55:02 LISA: Haha. Ok. How should I pose?

22:55:40 TRAVIS: Just a normal smile, look cute.

By January, Lisa and Travis are a couple again and the communication between Maria and Travis seems to be light. They share a couple of messages calling each other hot stuff and gorgeous, and Travis tells Maria he might have some play time for her in February 2008.

And sure enough, February would prove to be a busy month for Travis. It seems to be the month that all five women converge in a perfect storm. Travis is working hard on getting Chaitanya to sleep with Jodi. He has just met Mimi at church and his head is all a tizzy. This meeting with his soul mate prompts a break-up with girlfriend, Lisa. Yet, one day before the break-up, even though he claims to be distraught over the decision, he’s online with Maria in yet another jaw-dropping conversation.

February 17, 2008

07:33:20 TRAVIS to MARIA: I miss you. No honest, I do. My smile misses you :-)

Was Travis actually enjoying this tornado of women? Was there any part of him regretting the burden? It seems to me he was getting more and more cocky. If he felt he’d been thrown under the bus by women in the past, perhaps this was his way of getting insurance, of making sure he’d always have a backup so he’d never feel on the outs again. This is the clearest indicator yet that Travis had succumbed to his own VANITY, and unfortunately the T-Dogg wouldn’t escape the implications of the axiom: “Pride goes before the fall…”

With each consecutive dalliance, Travis’ confidence is blooming. He’s almost convinced of his own machismo. But in order to convince himself he’s truly attractive, with every sexual advance, he’s also getting more perverse. If he wants his latest target to demean herself, her willingness will confirm his desirability. A woman who will do anything for him, who will debase herself, who will go through discomfort or even pain – well that must mean the T-Dogg is really worth his salt, right? It means he’s the man, right?

If it’s the ego calling the shots, that sort of fucked up psychology makes perfect sense. In the first half of 2008, the year that Travis confidently declares: “This year will be the best year of my life and I will succeed!”

Travis is topping himself in terms of landing multiple girls simultaneously. Is this his idea of success?

February 17, 2008

07:53:56 MARIA: I wana hug ya!

07:54:27 TRAVIS: Arm hug or mouth hug or both

07:56:35 MARIA: Full body! ;)

07:57:16 TRAVIS: So lower body too then

08:01:07 TRAVIS: I like how you seductively open your mouth in pictures. It turns me on. Send me a pic.

08:39:30 TRAVIS: Now take one with your bra and panties

08:40:17 MARIA: That ull have to see for ur self

08:53:38 TRAVIS: Come on I need to keep some self esteem. Give me something.

Did you catch that? Here you can see Travis actually verbalising that his self-esteem is tied to woman performing for him. He wants to feel like a king, but the truth is, under that bravado, he feels worthless. He’s plagued constantly by feelings of rejection and low self-esteem. These feelings alternate with moments of VANITY, profanity and obscenity. Travis is walking a tightrope, one moment suspended on high, the next, when a woman rebuffs him, plunging into the abyss. The sad thing is that the thin cord Travis walks is made of nothing more substantial than his own VANITY. There is no platform, so when the slightest wind blows he begins to tremble. The slightest lack of concentration, the smallest error – take his eye off the ball (and the ball are these multiple partners – and the effect is sudden and terrifying. He begins to fall…

08:57:52 TRAVIS: Come on you can show me just a little somethin.

09:10:12 TRAVIS: Show me your hip bones

09:11:00 MARIA: Come see

09:13:56 TRAVIS: There you go again teasing. Its mean. You like it too. You have those half open lips seducing in all your picks. It makes me want to split you in half. TEASE!

09:42:57 MARIA: Prove ur not jus talk

09:44:47 TRAVIS: Ur the one that always back down. You’ve got me all horney and I’ve started to wonder with my hands but you stopped me. I had some wild ideas but all you do is tease me. U need to reward me a little.

09:48:07 MARIA: Cum ova

Let’s fast forward to April, and focus for a second on Mimi, because Mimi is really the central part of the story. She’s the girl who’s supposed to be Travis’ salvation. Mimi’s the fulcrum. Now let’s remind ourselves what’s happening in April – Travis is getting ready to ask Mimi to Cancun. This is the moment he’s been waiting for! And what is he doing just two days before that? Is he primping and pining over the right words to say? Dreaming of the moment this perfect girl says yes? The moment his future begins and his loneliness ends? Is that what he’s focused on? No, not exactly, try again.

April 26, 2008

06:14:45 TRAVIS to MARIA: So how far could we go? Just curious.

06:17:33 MARIA: Your serious aren’t you

06:17:52 TRAVIS: Yes

06:20:59 MARIA: Truthfully I have struggled to meet a good guy that actually cares for me and not just to get some that I rather not out my self in that situation… I’m done with the games… I know its not good for me and the thought of having to go to the bishop is scary.

Wow, that’s telling him. Maria, if she’s not onto Travis [except she is] she’s certainly onto something.

06:23:06 TRAVIS: Listen nerd I’m not trying to get you prego or send you to the big boss, just asking a simple question with a simple answer. So in ur opinion what’s the line?

06:47:07 TRAVIS: What about a BJ?

06:47:56 MARIA: Oh no you didn’t!

06:50:31 TRAVIS: No but I was hoping you would. That delicious tongue you slightly show in your pics could be put to good to work.

07:03:12 TRAVIS: The provo push will not get yo put in the bishops office by the way.

07:22:31 MARIA: I know but I’d rather not.. hey..! Your pretty bad for an lds. Travis! Your freekin HOT.

07:23:38 TRAVIS: I’m not bad at all. I am horny true but I stay pretty clean. Hot and evil according to you. I read my scriptures and ensign and say my prayers everyday. The only place I walk the line is on the moral things. Don’t drink caffeine don’t watch rated r movies.

Did you catch that? Do you see the VANITY in this psychology? Because I go to church and say my prayers, because my life appears to be clean and moral, it is. This is Travis not only justifying himself, he’s rationalising. To be frank, he’s lying – both to himself and Maria. Maybe Travis doesn’t drink caffeine, maybe he does, maybe he doesn’t watch R rated movies, maybe he does.

07:30:49 TRAVIS: Is it hot that with all that I still want you naked in my bed?

07:33:07 MARIA: That’s what makes you a typical man ;)

07:34:33 TRAVIS: No, it just makes you ridiculously hot and a irresistible temptation.

07:42:47 TRAVIS: Boy shorts or G strings?

07:46:40 MARIA: Shouldn’t you be getting some beauty sleep Mr Ouch!

07:47:01 TRAVIS: Yeah I should.

07:47:42 MARIA: I’ll let you on one condition. That you think of me before you go to sleep so you’ll have hot dreams ;)

07:51:54 TRAVIS: Deal. Hopefully wet dreams come true too.

While Travis is sexting with his buddy Maria, and hoping that Mimi says yes to Cancun, there’s something more ominous going on with Jodi. Her snooping has graduated to a whole other level. The email, text and social media hacking was bad enough, but this time she’s gotten into Travis’ personal journals. Jodi’s dark tree, nourished on the ashes of failed relationship misery is coming into its full shadowy extent. But look closer. Are those branches? Are those leaves? Or is that jagged outline something far more monstrous? A cunning beast of many forms is rippling through her skin, trying to emerge. Something alien, and evil, and almost reptilian is stirring, expanding through her from the inside. It infiltrates every cell like a cancer. Some unutterable rage, like a black ink, like some invisible chimera claiming its host, moves through her, making her able change her colours with each passing sentiment. She’s morphing into her true self; a cunning chameleon and a killer.

(VANITY: Jodi Arias by Lisa Wilson & Nick van der Leek)

[bettsfic]

socknography: the importance of preserving fan creator biographical data

i wrote earlier on utilizing collections and bookmarks to boost the archival power of ao3, and in that post mentioned how i wish authors would fill out their bios so we can preserve fanauthor information as well as we preserve the fics themselves. so, here is my rant about WHY WE ARE SO IMPORTANT.

for my masters thesis i wrote about the layered pseudonymity of fanfiction authors, and after doing a ton of research, i find myself still thinking of the pseudonymous/anonymous divide as it pertains to fic. we have authors we consider “famous” and ones whose followings eclipse that of traditionally published authors, but unlike traditionally published authors, we don’t put a handy bio at the end of our fics. in fact, if you want to find out about the author, you have to hope they’ve linked somewhere to their tumblr or twitter or dreamwidth, or they have consistent pseuds across platforms. and from there, you have to hope they have an ‘about me.’ but most, myself included, don’t.

unlike traditional publication -- where amazon and goodreads and even the back of the book contains biographical info -- and even unlike the rest of fandom archival etiquette -- which, despite having virtually no committed rules still maintains its organizational structure -- there is no standard etiquette on fanauthor biographical data. 

i speculate the reasons fanauthors are hesitant to write their own biographies is very complicated: 

there is no “ask” for it or existing standard. when i publish stories under my real name, i’m required to provide my bio, which contains my accomplishments, where i got my degree, where else i’m published, and my website. all literary author bios follow this formula, so they’re pretty easy to write. other than this post, i have never seen a request for fanauthor bios. so without an editor demanding it, and without a standard formula or platform to draw from, a total lack of information becomes the norm, and almost any info other than the standard “name. age. pronouns. ao3 name. list of fandoms and/or pithy one-liner” of tumblr or occasional ask game is seen as a deviation from the norm. even ask games get a bad rep sometimes, and they’re transitory, a post you see as you’re scrolling through to somewhere else, not static, like a dedicated profile page.

pseudonymity veers too close to anonymity. an anonymous author cannot have a biography. a pseudonymous author can, but biographies may be seen as defeating the purpose of writing under a pseudonym, or multiple pseuds. a sock account is a sock for a reason -- you don’t want it associated with your main. moreover, i believe fandom creates an environment in which to acknowledge your accomplishments and promote your own content is seen as narcissistic. fanfiction can sometimes be seen as a genre of selflessness, donating time and energy into a community centered around a shared canon, not personal gain. to acknowledge the self publicly is to invite attention, and attention is contradictory to anonymity.

shame and humility. the more information you have on the internet, the easier you are to find. very few fanauthors use their real names, or feel comfortable connecting their fan identity to their real one. i hear pretty constantly how often fanauthors hide their fannishness from their coworkers and loved ones, how only the people closest to them know they write/read fanfic. moreover, you might think “my most popular fic only has 10 kudos and 1 comment, nobody wants to know about me” (which is so not true, but i’ll get to that in a minute).

fandom is constantly changing. with a central archive for fanfiction in place, it’s easier now to be in multiple fandoms at once than it ever has been. if you want to read all sugar daddy fics, there’s a tag for that, and if you’re not picky about canon, you have an entire buffet of fandoms to choose from. communities are growing and shifting and changing shape. i move fandoms, and i keep my friends and readers from previous fandoms. i get dragged to new fandoms frequently. my interests and inspirations change, but i don’t erase my history or identity every time i move, i only add to it. i am always betts whether i’m in star wars or the 100 or game of thrones. but if you only read my fic, you don’t know the stories behind it. many people don’t know i entered fandom in the brony convention community in 2012, or that i was sadrobots before i was betty days before i was betts, or how fandom changed my life and led me through a path of personal trauma recovery, or that i co-founded wayward daughters, or ran the fanauthor workshop, or all these other things about fanfic that is not fanfic itself. 

if you are a fan creator, your fannish personal narrative matters. telling your story helps preserve the metatextual history of our genre.

i think constantly about what our genre will look like in 30 or 50 years, if it will be like other genres that began as subversions of the mainstream: comic books, beat literature, science fiction. genres that, at the time involved groups of friends creating stories for each other, bouncing ideas off of one another, experimenting with or distorting other genres, and which became, over time, well-regarded forms with rich histories. 

maybe one day, like the MCU, we’ll have a dedicated production company that churns out adaptations of longform coffee shop aus written between 2009 and 2015. maybe “BNFs” will be read in high school literature curriculums. maybe our work will end up on the real or virtual shelves of our great grandchildren. and if that happens, if fanfic goes entirely mainstream, how will fanfic authorship be perceived? how will fanpeople in 2080, if humanity is still around by then, interact with the lexicon we’ve created and preserved? what would you do if you found out Jane Austen wrote under five different sock accounts across three platforms over the span of twenty years? how would you, a fan of Pride & Prejudice, even begin to find all of her work?

we have so many social constraints pushing against us. there’s purity culture, which encourages further division of identity -- fanauthors may write fluff on their main and have various sock accounts for underage/noncon fics. if you’re a scarecrow, you’re much harder for a mob to attack. there���s misogyny, which dictates women/queer ppl shouldn’t be writing about or indulging in or exploring their sexuality at all. there’s intellectual property and a history of DMCAs, which, although kept at bay by the OTW, may still have influence on the “illegal” mentality of our work. with social armies against us, it’s easier to exist in the shadows, on the fringe. we change URLs based on our moving interests, and split our identities a million different ways, and keep sarcastic “me” tags full of self-deprecating text posts. we are difficult beasts to catch, because we have not been allowed to exist.

i spent a lot of time today googling the word for “pseudonymous biography” and came up empty-handed (if someone knows of an existing word, pls let me know. “pseudography” is apparently a fancy word for a typo; “pseudobiography” is a fake biography), so for lack of anything better, i’ve come up with the term “socknography” because 1) it’s funny and doesn’t sound intimidating, and 2) it encapsulates the sensitive and complicated way fanauthor identifying conventions work. and also i think “fanauthor biography,” “bibliography,” and “profile” just doesn’t cut it for the actual work of these pieces. they don’t necessarily include IRL biographical data, they include more historical/community context than a bibliography, and the words “profile” and “about me” don’t really inspire interaction, or acknowledge the archival importance of this work.

astolat’s fanlore page is my go-to example. astolat writes under multiple pseuds and has major influence in the history of fandom. she’s also a traditionally published author, but you notice, her ofic novels are not mentioned, nor any other real-life identifying information. fanlore has a really good policy on this in place, for those concerned about doxxing. 

(moreover, i am not suggesting you centralize your socks. they’re socks for a reason. but most everyone has a main, and that main identity has a story.)

there are 2 existing spaces to preserve socknographies. 

fanlore, a wiki owned by the OTW, you can make an account and create a user page (which is different than a “person” page) using a user profile template

ao3′s “profile” page, which is a big blank box in which anything goes

(i’m not including tumblr on this list because i don’t think it’s a stable platform.) 

fanlore’s template is straight to the point and minimal, which doesn’t really invite narrative the same way a literary bio would. ao3′s big blank box leaves us with the question -- wtf do i say about myself? how do i say it? how much is too much? and because of that, most profiles are either blank or only include a policy on translations/podfic/fanart, and maybe links to tumblr and twitter. but let me tell you, if i have read your fic and taken the time to move over to your profile, you better believe i am a fan. and as a fan, i want to Know Things.

here are the things i want to know, or

a potential template:

introduction (name/alias, age, location, pronouns, occupation)

accomplishments (degrees, personal history)

fan history (fandoms you’ve been in, timeline as a fan, how you were introduced to fandom/fanfiction, what does fandom mean to you -- this is where your fan narrative goes)

fandom participation (popular fics/posts, involvement in fan events/communities, side blogs, interviews, etc. 3 & 4 might be one and the same for you)

spotlight (which of your fics are most important to you/would you like others to read and why? what are the stories behind your favorite fics you’ve written?)

find me elsewhere* (links to tumblr, twitter, insta, etc.)

policies on fanart, fanfic of fic, podfics, and translations

*you cannot link to ko-fi, paypal, patreon, or amazon on ao3/fanlore per the non-commercial terms of service

i’ll be working on filling this out for my own profile as an example, but you can also see how my @fanauthorworkshop participants filled out their fanauthor spotlights, and the information they provided. obviously, you should only share that which you feel comfortable sharing, and as your fandom life changes, your narrative will change too. it’s not much different than updating a CV or resume.

tl;dr the goal is to provide a self-narrative of your fan life/identity for posterity. who are you and why are you a fanperson? why do you create fan content? what are you proud of and what do you want to highlight to others? who are you in this space?

[smarti-at-smogwarts]

First Year Profile

Taking a page from the lovely @carewyncromwell​ who’s the blog that introduced me  to HPHM and encouraged me to play. 

While I’m still in year one [ im trying to catch up as fast as possible T-T] I wanted to jot some stuff down about my MC and  maybe have ppl meet her. 

There’s stuff missing but that will be added as I progress through the game. 

[ Image ID close up of a girl with shoulder lenght brown hair, a round nose, and blue eyes. She’s smiling at the camera. End ID]

NAME | Marta Beatrice Venturi

NICKNAMES | Marti -Goes by that everywhere, actually doesn’t like her full name, and only gets called it when she’s in trouble-. Smarti [ Jacob called her this. Off limits] Munchkin [ her dad] Venturi. [ Snape and Merulla] 

Pronouns | She/Her 

ORIENTATION | Bi

[PERSONALITY] Marti is a bit capricious due  to being the baby of her family and tends to want things to go her way. She’s a bit mischievous because of this and can be rather childish though also very playful and sweet for the same reason. She is also incredibly empathetic and always there for her friends, becoming very protective of them. She’s highly social and outgoing often known for befriending people at the drop of a hat. Despite this first impressions tend to stick to her and once she makes up her mind about you it can take a lot for her to change it. [ ie both Snape and Merula are already in a bad light for her after one meeting with each while both Flitwick and Hagrid are in a good light.] 

She’s very protective of and tries to do right by those she considers friends and can be highly protective of them. 

[Image ID; Marti standing between a girl with dark skin, ling black hair and glasses [ her friend Rowan] and a girl with  short brown hair. The text reads under her ‘’get away from her’ End ID]

Jacob is her berserk button as she loves him dearly and still hasn’t let him go. Anyone talking badly about him instantly goes on her sh-t list and will cause her to lose her temper.  

[Image ID- Marti looking angry as a text box below him reads ‘’expelling him was completely unfair; and it was just as wrong of him to run away without telling. End ID]

[BIOGRAPHY]

Marti is the third child of Abigail Rowle and George Venturi. Both purebloods. They had two boys before her, Jacob [ ten years older than Marti] and Edwin [ four years older than Marti]. Most of Marti’s early memories include her family either together or separately and are good ones.  She was specially close to her oldest brother as he often babied her and had a soft spot for her. 

There was a rough patch when Abigail and George after months of arguments and the relationship being rocky, separated. However, Marti was both too young and sheltered by both her brothers for it to affect her too much.  Their father, a wizard world attorney, kept full custody of the three of them which Abigail was okay with.

Raising three kids was a handful for George and while he tried his best and the family was very loving [ with all three Venturi kids being unequivocally Daddy’s Girl/Boys] there were a lot of times when Jacob and even Edwin eventually  picked up the slack. Being the baby, Marti was coddled and never wanted for much attention not in the very least because while Jacob tried to not have favorites between his siblings he undoubtedly had a soft spot for his baby sister.[ not that Edwin ever begrudged her this. ]  

While Jacob went to Hogwarts when Marti was still really young [ which led to more than a few tantrums specially in his first year] he remained an important figure in her life and the three Venturi remained close, reuniting every break the school allowed even after Edwin joined his brother [ starting his Hogwarts career when Marti was  six ]

Unfortunately this wasn’t to last. Jacob vanished during his sixth year which sent the small family into turmoil. Edwin, who was about to start his first year, became withdrawn and sulked on his own, closing himself off to everyone including his own family. George was distraught at losing his oldest son. His relationship with Abigail became strained since they separated amicably enough but the loss of a child led them to be unable to be in the same room without assigning blame. [ though Abby still keeps her visits with her children she just..doesn’t speak to their father.]

And Marti lost her big brother.

The family grieved and eventually seemed to move on though none of them have completely let Jacob go. George still blames himself and harbors a lot of feelings of failing his son. Edwin is hugely withdrawn and refuses to speak on the matter. Marti in particular refuses to let Jacob go or give up on him returning and refuses to believe the things said about him. Jacob was and still is her hero, she had him on a pedestal before he left and still wants him to come back. Something that puts her at odds with Edwin who wants to forget and move on. 

A few years down the line, George married a muggle named Nora who herself had a magical child and a muggle one. Both Edwin and Marti took this as a sign things would get better and that the family could heal, and both were happy to have additions to the family. 

However this also added to Marti’s feelings that she was the only one who still remembered and hadn’t given up on Jacob as Edwin befriended Nora’s magical daughter [ her being the same age as him and a Hufflefpuff and the two becoming best friends as well as siblings] and her father seemed to move on with the help of his new wife.  

Because of this she even more stubbornly clung to Jacob, to the happy memories she had of him- which she seemed to be alone in as his name was tarnished- and the more the family tried to get her to give up on him coming back, the more she dug her heels in. 

Now going to Hogwarts, Marti is excited to start at the school and learn new things. She’s also determined to use the things she learns to bring her brother home someday. 

WAND |  blackthorn wand with a unicorn hair core. It is eleven-and-a-quarter inches and described as "slightly springy and flexible.

Blackthorn, which is a very unusual wand wood, has the reputation, in my view well-merited, of being best suited to a warrior. This does not necessarily mean that its owner practices the Dark Arts (although it is undeniable that those who do so will enjoy the blackthorn wand’s prodigious power); one finds blackthorn wands among the Aurors as well as among the denizens of Azkaban. It is a curious feature of the blackthorn bush, which sports wicked thorns, that it produces its sweetest berries after the hardest frosts, and the wands made from this wood appear to need to pass through danger or hardship with their owners to become truly bonded. Given this condition, the blackthorn wand will become as loyal and faithful a servant as one could wish.

Unicorn hair generally produces the most consistent magic, and is least subject to fluctuations and blockages. Wands with unicorn cores are generally the most difficult to turn to the Dark Arts. They are the most faithful of all wands, and usually remain strongly attached to their first owner, irrespective of whether he or she was an accomplished witch or wizard.Minor disadvantages of unicorn hair are that they do not make the most powerful wands (although the wand wood may compensate) and that they are prone to melancholy if seriously mishandled, meaning that the hair may 'die' and need replacing.

HOUSE | Slytherin 

[MISC]

♦  Marti loves animals especially those often not considered cute [ bats, reptiles, bugs]  and has a pet snake she left at home as she didn’t see anything about snakes being acceptable pets in the letter. She plans to ask about it at some point in her first year. Her pet snake’s name is Mickey. 

♦  Marti has 2 siblings in Hogwarts. Lizzie Mcdonald in Hufflepuff and Edwin Venturi in Ravenclaw. They don’t interact that much however due to the age gap [ they’ll graduate by the end of year 2] and the fact  that they have different social groups [ well Marti and Lizzie do. Edwin’s more a withdrawn Loner] as well as being in different houses. 

♦   This is also in part because of Marti’s own feelings of perceived exclusion. While they love her very much and don’t mean to do it, the unmistakable  synergy between her elder siblings and the friendship that immediately sparked from it often leaves Marti feeling left out or looking from the outside. It makes her miss Jacob and cling to the idea of him coming back all the more since she remembers having a close relationship with him/being closer to him than to Edwin. 

♦  The Venturi’s are very protective of each other[ and of their step siblings] specifically because of what happened to Jacob. It affected them both very badly though differently.  

♦  The Venturi’s are considered blood traitors by most purebloods due to their lax views on Muggleborn wizards especially now that George married a muggle. [ their view of George was already low due to having separated from his pureblood wife]. 

♦  More to the point, all three Venturis [ George, Edwin and Marti ] are hugely defensive against anti-muggle and anti-muggle born sentiments due to Nora and her daughters being part of their family and are likely to react violently to it, especially if directed at them. 

♦  Marti has a love for old rock bands due to Jacob often listening to them when she was little/when he was still around. 

♦   She wore cat ear headbands as a kid and sometimes still wears them [ specially in first year second and third  as she’s still a child but I can definitely see her wearing them for fun as a teenager] 

♦  Marti has a list of spells she wants to learn specifically to prank Merula. And she might be trying to remember what pranks Edwin and Jacob used on each other before Jacob went missing. 

♦  Marti has -undiagnosed ADHD- and RSD [ Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria] which itself is a sympton of ADHD. This often leads to her not focusing in long classes sometimes and spacing out a lot or thinking of other things in class. 

♦  RSD in particular makes it hard for her to regulate emotions and makes her incredibly sensible to perceived [ or real] rejection. She sometimes ends up crying even when she doesn’t want to  [ ie when Snape blamed her for Merula’s prank.] It’s specially going to be harder in her younger years. 

♦  While this won’t happen for a long time, Marti’s first exposure to a boggart will reveal her biggest fear to be her family forgetting about all Jacob. 

♦   Her mirror of erised by contrast is her whole family including Jacob with Edwin smiling like he used to and her dad not looking so worn and sad as he does ever since Jacob went missing. 

FC  Emily Rudd

Older

Friends In Game:

Rowan Khana

Ben Cooper

Penny Haywood

Chiara Lobosca

MC Friends:

Vixen Mcmahen ( @rosievixen​ ) Ryan O’Donnell,  Cara O’Donnell,  Sara O’Donnell,  Conor O’Donnell ( @unfortunate-arrow​)  Finnick -Finn- Moran ( @ljbard121​ ) Cato Reese ( @catohphm​ ) Henry Mclarnon ( @that-ravenpuff-witch​ ) Lyra Wilson ( @cursebreakerfarrier​ )

If you wanna talk about your MC being friends with Marti let me know

[eumaxine]

⟨ ZENDAYA COLEMAN. CIS FEMALE. SHE/HER. ⟩ though the mist might prevent some from seeing it, MAXINE GARCIA is actually a descendent of H A D E S. it’s still a question of whether or not the TWENTY-ONE year old GEOKINESIS MAJOR from MARSEILLE, FRANCE has taken after their godly parent completely, but the demigod is still known to be quite PASSIONATE & INSENSITIVE.

hello, hi!!! it’s me, xun, back at it again with another (old) muse! maxine is basically here to do the exact opposite of sage (create chaos and disorder and lots of angry ppl), and i am SO excited to be back! i have a background written over here and a profile page over here. i do have a plots page but it’s outdated so i’ll work on updating that first @@

ANYHOW, some quick facts:

maxine maria garcia, born in october 1998, marseille. 

call her max tho

lived together with only her mother until she was about thirteen years old 

found out about her powers by accident when she was being her salty self @ her father again and suddenly the earth around her started to tremble (not really, just the pebbles lmao)

fled inside and had some weird ass dreams about those happenings and her father, until hades finally reached out to her with a note on her night stand (great communication skills, everyone.) 

actually thought hades was the villain from hercules at first (she was 9 when hades reached out i mean??), and did all her research by herself on the computer to figure out who he really was

after she really found out who he was, she also fully discovered her powers and kept trying to improve her skills (mostly geokinesis, though)

loves to throw with rocks of all sizes, at everything ever. might have accidentally hit some people while practicing. might have hit her mother’s new boyfriend on purpose a couple of times. might have tried to run away from him and fucked up worse. 

also why her mother decided to send her to a demigod camp (the one in athens) 

at the camp, she soon realises that, although everyone is friendly, hades has quite the bad reputation. instead of trying to prove them all wrong, however, maxine instead makes it worse and enjoys to feed into their little dark fantasies (yes my dad will send u straight into tartarus if you don’t listen to me) (cerberus loves to have demigod children for breakfast :-))

super loyal friend if you do manage to get close to her. terrible person to be in a relationship with. she is so worried about truly falling for someone that she always breaks off her relationships when things start to get serious. no reasons given. 

(kinda lowkey can’t stand children of aphrodite like what kind of bullshit goddess is that?) 

her temper is terrible. she loves to get under people’s skin, but if people get under her skin they better prepare to fight.

loves to leave notes everywhere. constantly writes them as reminders or just to piss of her father and try and get his attention. he replied to her once, why not again? 

honestly would love to meet hades even though she thinks he’s an asshole 

she’s in the capture the flag club as well as responsible for the gossip column of the school paper (GIVE ME PLOTS FOR THIS) and overall just always getting into trouble 

im still a sucker for drama ang angst so if you are willing to bear with my flaky ass, PLEASE do hit me up!!

i would LOVE:

some super close friends for her (bad and/or good influences) (soulmates and/or opposites???) 

some enemies (she literally will provoke fights and try to get under people’s skin whenever) 

some exes (she’ll have cut it off the moment things were getting serious so they’d likely be on bad terms. there might be lingering feelings on her side but she would NEVER admit to that) (but likewise, your muse could have cut it off??? chances are it all ended on a bad not so lets GO)

people who just do not vibe with her and her altogether chaotic energy. perhaps scared some of your muse’s younger siblings with her stories of hades a few years back? might still try to do that???

maybe your muse cheated on her friend and she has likely tried to set your room on fire after that

fellow troublemakers just looking to get into trouble w her (or not even trying, it just somehow ALWAYS ends up happening)

someone who will help her find the hottest gossip around campus!!! will not hesitate to do the most to ruin the reputation of someone she doesn’t like.

aphrodite kids to bother bc lmao your mother is what? the goddes of ~love~? cool story man but how is being the child of a petty, useless goddess working out for you? 

[yjbenny]

        ⁺ ☾ :         howdy :’) it’s your friendly neighborhood cowboy, bijou (she/they + 24 + cst), back again with my sweet and salty fortune telling baby, benny ! i’m really happy to bring her in and see what she can do in the grand scheme of things. i’ve got a bit of information below as well as some minor plots, but i’ve also got a profile ( here ) and a plots page ( here ) !

please let me know if you’d like to plot (i’ll be posting a starter call soon!), and if tumblr ims don’t do it for you, i’ve got a discord i’m willing to give out per request !

little info dump!!

benny was born on october 30, 2000 (and adopted in 2001, but she doesn’t like to talk about that) and she lies to almost everyone and tells them her birthday is october 31 to keep up her “spooky” factor

she’s got two older sisters who were both adopted as well and though she’s acclimated quickly, she occasionally feels like the outsider in her family for the last one introduced

her parents were often a topic of discussion amongst adults and kids alike as she was growing up. her mother is white, jewish, and from new york, which is a stark contrast from her seoul born and raised business man of a father which made their whole family stand out a bit

she was raised between new york (mostly summers/not quite a regular thing) and yongsa, so she’s a native to the area and has a few close friends/family connections which explains why no one’s asked her to tear down her tent yet

re: tent: benny sets up a tent to do her fortune telling on thursday mornings and from thursday at 8-11, then friday-sunday from 9-12, she does her fortune telling, mostly frequented by tourists (she offers tarot, palm readings, tea leaf readings, and crystal ball scrying)

she’s only ever like half serious about fortune telling when she’s not at work and a lot of the time she uses “bad energy” and “intuition” as an excuse not to do things she doesn’t want to do

she’s really actually sweet once you push past all the weird and the girl is desperate for friends, she doesn’t know how to make them or keep them but that’s because she’s never had to worry about them

she’s currently attending classes at yongsa community college but she’s got no goal in mind or direction, it’s really just to keep her parents happy and keep herself from getting a “real job”

possible connections!!

a regular at her shop. someone who really eats up everything she serves and even might go to her off the clock for advice, which she loves because the girl has a power complex

kids who also feel like outsiders, freaks need to stick together, so anyone that isn’t super popular, who hangs on the outskirts, will immediately be someone that benny gravitates toward

maybe past enemies? someone who misguidedly bullied her in school and moved on but damn... y’all live in the same place now and she hasn’t forgotten at all

flirtationships, obv... she’s a baby and doesn’t understand how to flirt in the SLIGHTEST so i’d love to see her try (and crash and burn)

ppl who will break benny out of her “weird goth kid” shell, she’s barely goth, she just knows it’s easier to be the weird one than let anyone get close to her!!

someone who constantly hangs around her even though they think her readings are full of shit. maybe someone who butts heads with her but they’re really close???

i’m really open to ANYTHING!!!!!!!

[pain-somnia]

(Karamelhere P1) Hello I read on your fanfic profile that U won't be continuing TPOAM cuz of the hate on a ship outside of SS. I know some anti shipper reviews can be discouraging,depressing, & annoying. Please remember there are fans out in the world who do ship & love that outside pairing. The anti are LOSERS who just want to send hate reviews. U can face these losers & continue to write that ship & story. Don't let their reviews break U.

(Karamelhere P2) They can either continue to read & deal with the pairing or just stop reading. TPOAM is a fantastic story & ALL the pairings are greatly written. It would be a shame if you gave up on it cuz of some anti shippers can’t deal with a pairing. Every writer gets some kind of hate. Even Kishimoto got a lot of hate & he still wrote the pairings he wanted and didn’t let antis get to him. So please hold your head up high & write that pairing and TPOAM with PRIDE. U can totally do this.

(Karamelhere P3) We pro outside shippers have your back. We’ll help you face these losers whom I’m sure can’t even write a decent character or story. I along with other pro outside shippers believe in you. This is all up to you. It’s your choice. For some reason I feel like I just gave a war speech.

Edit: oops i hit post way too soon lolI feel like I gotta remind everyone that the issue with ppl hating the queer ship I love was only the final straw to the problem with TPoaM.

The issue is the lack of interaction. If you like something maybe comment? The statistics honestly mean shit to me.

If I see a rise in statistics but no comments what it looks like to me is that ppl opened it, read it, didn’t like it, and then moved on from the chapter/fic. Because a lack of comments equals “didn’t like it but I’m not going to be rude and say something bad.”

Faves/Follows are great but if all I get is “pls update” I don’t want to update at all. Like recently I started thinking a patron of mine on Patreon was right about not posting publicly anymore. Ppl on Patreon support me by pledging monthly so it doesn’t matter to me if they don’t comment. But if you’re reading my stuff for free you might as well comment. It’s the least ppl can do. But I get no likes, reblogs, or comments. I see the stats that ppl have opened or have gone to the page for updates. But then nothing. That really doesn’t say anything to me. I don’t follow the reasoning of “oh it has lots of activity it must be liked!” I see it as a failure because no one could say one thing they enjoyed.

So yeah, TPoaM will be updated later but not for fanfiction.net

I’ll only update it on Patreon. You can pledge to read it when I post it.

[antigoneblue]

hi, i just abandoned my old blog and started a new one to post my poetry like. last night and ik it takes a while to get exposure but do u have any tips for getting ppl to read ur stuff if ur new and have like 4 followers? (btw love love love ur poetry it just feels rly raw and emotional and ahhhhhhhh ur amazing!!)

hi!! this is something that everyone probably has different strategies on, so this is just my two cents. this got really long so i’m putting it under a “read more”

make your blog presentable & unique/true to your style. this might sound like a snobbish thing to say, but there are tons of people blogging on tumblr. if you want people to notice you and to linger on your page, try and choose a good username, a profile pic that fits your vibe, a theme that is clear and easy to navigate, etc. there have legitimately been times when i’ve wanted to follow somebody but their desktop theme has been so messy that i couldn’t find their follow button. make your blog look nice!! have a nice tagging system!! make it obvious that you put some amount of thought and deliberation into making it. 

interact with poets you admire. this does not mean that you shoot people messages like “follow for a follow”  though, like. personally, i never follow people who send me stuff like that. be sincere.  everyone loves validation. reblog their stuff and talk in tags about why you loved it. message them if they’re having a bad day and tell them that you care.  make rec lists with other people’s poetry & tag them in these. something i used to do was leave poets whose work i liked little poems i’d written for them in their askboxes, usually off anon. do things like that, but don’t expect anything in return. if someone feels like you are genuinely being supportive, they are more likely to want to support you too, as compared to the whole “follow for a follow” thing.  you’ll also make cool friends in the process!!

this should’ve been point #1 maybe but i’d suggest that you keep your poetry on your main blog. your main blog is what shows in people’s notifs for likes, replies, asks and follows. it is much harder to get your sideblog to be as visible, usually. however, i have friends who have poetry sideblogs and on their main blog title or bio they mention “PLS FOLLOW ME @ ______ WHICH IS WHERE MY POETRY IS.” which is fine of course, but i’m not sure how effective it is? i used to have a poetry sideblog in 2016. i had maybe 30 followers. it’s HARD.

use relevant hashtags. i’m going to be super duper honest, i don’t really remember which hashtags work best. i usually use spilled ink, poets on tumblr, free verse, poetry, and other arbitrary tags as well as network tags. see what tags poets you like use and try using those. don’t use tags that you don’t have any claim to use (like don’t use poc tags if you’re white, etc. but you probably already knew that. also some networks like soft poets society have closed tags, so don’t use those without their permission.) some poets encourage their followers to use tags they’re tracking (i track #antigoneblue, for example) so like. if you want to be noticed just see which tags seem to work! 

join networks. you’ll meet like minded creators, and you will also find yourself in a space where everyone promotes everyone else. networks are usually good places to get exposure, to get noticed, and also to grow as a poet! 

interact with prompts. some networks post discussions, like nosebleedclub used to (idk if they still do?). some users post prompts, like adam ( julykings ) used to. keep your eyes open for these. when you write for them, the prompters will usually check your work out, and if they like it, they may promote it as well! 

don’t feel bad about reblogging your own work. we’re all yelling into a void trying to get noticed here.

similarly - don’t feel bad reblogging posts like “i’m looking for more poetry blogs to follow, reblog this and i’ll check yours out.” do it!!  there’s nothing shameful about wanting to be noticed.

i can’t think of anything else, but i feel like i’m forgetting stuff. anyone from @inkflowsnetwork have anything to add? uhhh….. @avi-burton-writing - you don’t run a poetry blog but you’re a pretty active and integral part of the writeblr community, do you have anything else to add????? 

idk. if anyone wants to add something, or expand/ contradict one of my points, feel free to! all the best, anon!

[yangyangrk]

     this is so late bc i suddenly had a life sry everyone but thx for all the welcomes ,  it’s a welcome back for me ,  i was here for a short while a few months ago. that being said , im back and ready to try again !  this is yangyang ,  he’s had a somewhat complicated life and his main interest used to be playing piano and competing but now he’s interested in idol life and seeing what can come of it because music is his one (1) passion. i have quite a few pages set up for him ,  but not a plots page so im afraid we’ll all have to go the old fashioned route and brainstorm but here’s his profile , details , backstory , and ill list some points below and u can feel free to like this post if you’d like to plot !  i’m a little slow when it comes to ims so please bear with me .  i also have discord which you can ask me for if you’re more comfortable there , or my twitter is @gyuncall if you find that easier . 

possible tw: mentions of death 

son of an ambassador & socialite ,  he grew up primarily in germany until his father’s death which eventually led him here to seoul where he lives with a family friend 

was a little spoiled growing up but his parents tried to keep him humble ,  which he esp had to adapt to after the move 

has slight abandonment issues re: his family so he can be clingy at times but also expects ppl 2 leave him so if he thinks ur gonna distance urself from him , he might do it first

is in his third year @ sopa , is definitely as involved as he can get into the school community in attempts to fit in and make as many friends as he can so possible plot maybe!!

is a romantic at heart ,  likes cheesy love stories and watching feel good movies ,  little gestures go a long way

starting playing piano ( classical ) and competing when he was a young kid and got a lot of recognition for it ,  named a prodigy but he stopped a while ago when his father died as he was his biggest supporter n role model ,  now rarely plays it or if he does its almost never around other ppl 

beethoven , moonlight sonata movement 1

can be quite passive , might let ppl walk over him if he thinks it’ll make them happy , just wants the ppl he loves 2 be happy and will go to great lengths to achieve it 

however can be a little blase when it comes to the general public bc he may hurt others in the process of doing smth for his loved one but he doesnt rly care ... the ends justify the means x

all in all tho he’s a wip ,  i will be learning alongside u guys and developing him as we go as i dont really have a sense of direction as to where i want to take him yet so !! fun .

[thesecretattic]

Grey Pages**

**not affiliated with yellow pages

I haven’t spoken to anyone like I said since the age of 22 (2017) no one at all… I wake up to 0 notifications even on my birthday & 0 likes, comments, etc. I am not “antisocial” in fact I’m very friendly and gregarious but people are only looking for benefits these days… and good looks/money. I had apps like Snapchat, Messenger, WhatsApp, BBM, etc. but I deleted them cuz they turned out to be my biggest mistake & maximum of them are connected to 501 (and a few other guys) I haven’t stalked anyone since 2016, I don’t follow anyone, only brand pages in fact I never followed people who didn’t follow me back, the same goes for celebs, whoever I followed were following me in return, if you’ve spoken to me and shown interest in me and if you expect me to follow you then you’ll have to follow me back, don’t tell me you’re another desperate wannabe who’s coming on dating apps to gather fans… only illiterate people worship other human beings. I’ve seen them leaving comments like “Dear” “Babygirl” My Angel Shraddha Kapoor” etc. lol (even middle aged aunties write all this so it’s a bit creepy) they keep interacting with Bollywood celebs in their broken English, sometimes I feel sorry for those celebs but when Bollywood actors are getting all this what makes you think you’ll will get fans like us? Liking a movie or someone’s acting is different but all this is very low… that too I love Angelina Jolie, Johnny Depp, SRK, Aishwarya Rai Bachchan, Akshay Kumar, Piggy Chops, etc. and I don’t follow all of them on Social media because I hardly use those apps. Coming back to the main topic, I mostly follow brands and stuff because I’m interested in home decor and I collect things for my journal and my teenage cousin (she keeps posting memes and all) that’s it… Like I had said I don’t stalk anyone cuz 501 and all those who’re associated with him give me panic attacks, I get anxious and all and my heart is in my mouth even when I see someone resembling him. I see no point in stalking anyway, you either stalk because you are interested or you do that out of hate, to deride & remove flaws in people, I have no reason to stalk. Earlier when I was journaling on Insta I was receiving a lot of suggestions and they included celebrity accs (not talking about T.V. actors) like Kardashians or Models, Sportspersons, etc. but honestly I’m not someone who would blindly follow all those who have a verified tick… I don’t stalk anyone else either, at times I’ve dropped a few likes for certain ppl when I’ve stumbled upon their IDs but other than that I mostly stick to my own posts, if I might have seen someone’s profile then it must’ve been for fashion, beauty and makeup that too I’m not interested in bloggers, I steer clear from them… they aren’t that talented, it’s all advertisement. I’m not on apps like Snapchat or messenger anymore, I’m sure you know why and anyway what’s the point? I never had any friends and people are very rude & hostile even with “suggested IDs” and mutual contacts, they are constantly seeking benefits and they objectify girls, other than that, they are very arrogant and rough… and so are females. Having 0 notifications feels insulting but I can’t do anything about it. Next, I don’t have WhatsApp either I’m like your grandma sorry I forgot even my grandma has WhatsApp 🤦🏻‍♀️ umm the other day someone from a store called me up for order confirmation and she asked me if my number was on WhatsApp cuz she thought it’s not working anymore and I had to tell her it’s functioning but I’m only on “SMS”, everytime some salesperson asks me if they can send images over WhatsApp I give them my mother’s number and then my mother sends me those things via É-mail, she has to use that “old fashioned” method and don’t worry I have more than 7 email accounts & 50,592 unread mails. Oh looks like I’ve got 3 more mails… There’s a lot more in the latter half of my post

Btw all those who believe Memes are pronounced as “Meems” are a bit wrong, I was pondering upon it and I realised that maybe we’ve been wrong our whole lives :/ idk it’s quite erroneous… Memes are always supposed to be relatable more than anything else, so whenever we see a meme the first thing we all exclaim is “Me-that’s so me…” hence it’s actually a “Me-Me” but it sounds funny nonetheless. As you all know I’m not a “stalker” I’m a *professional detective* luckily keeping my panic attacks in mind, I don’t have to stalk anyone I have all the relevant info of my enemies in the palm of my hand hahaha I had 501’s old telephone number, his mom’s number, his number, his Gujarat Address, his Mumbai address, his Gujarat’s neighbour’s number, Prashant Sir’s number, his brother’s office address and office number, his brother’s number, his brother’s best friend’s number, his brother’s best friend’s dad’s number, his brother’s best friend’s dad’s brother’s number… I’m not lying, his uncle is Shakoun Jain. When I saw that old Gentleman (not 501) his best friend’s dad I realised yeh sab genes ka maamla hai… Sr**n looks like his dad that’s why itna itaraata hai, we didn’t get to choose our looks or parents 🤷🏻‍♀️ why be such a narcissist? :/ Anywho, I would’ve used the term Yellow Pages but it would’ve been too innocuous, so my unique Enemy Directory should be called “Grey Pages” I got all that without stalking anyone, that was one major challenge for me cuz like I said I would get panic attacks (I still do) but luckily, I’m supremely talented so no worries, I didn’t have to stalk any of them or their rishteydaars. Btw I never contacted anyone informally on WhatsApp I don’t have that app and even if I would’ve kept it I wouldn’t have, even when I did, I wouldn’t bother anyone… WhatsApp is a bit informal, it’s for friends and all or businesses, so if it’s something extremely relevant or important like coincidences and stuff I send the link via SMS.

If you are looking for anyone’s contact details psst… or any other info, such as their whereabouts then I accept cheques from all major banks.

Signing off

𝒞𝒵. Zara Sauleh

[staysuki]

Ashville is a cute town name, it sounds like a legit place lmao. I’m getting animal crossing vibes-

I wish BS, I would write literally anything if I was motivated enough but I guess there’s that fear that no one will read it. I’m sure every writer has experience that. Maybe I’ll try one day under a Lovegame account? Idk I’ll have to think about it 🤧.

The inside jokes are top tier, you can never go wrong with implementing irl scenes into stories. 404 is a great chance for you to kick back and just write as it comes to you. Think if it as a ‘loosening up tense shoulders’ type of thing <3

I saw your written post under BS anons ask about the ‘who suits which Y/n’ question. I actually read hey hey golden boy and I can see why you chose that Y/n for me. It’s the detailed analysis right? Wanting to figure out as much as she can before diving head first into any leadership of sorts. I felt that. Felix was super sweet in that fic too, I enjoyed the haikyuu vibes of it all. I don’t know much about basketball so I would most likely do exactly as the story stated, study like a freak but yeah I think you might have got that on-point. Tbh I saw a little bit of you in that fic too haha.

But for some reason if I imagined you were in a fic, I think it would be cafe themed. Everyday you go to your local cafe with your computer and a coffee to sit at a table, you would draw people as they come and go onto the papers of your little art journal, it’s precious pages falling apart from it’s binding. Your creative so maybe you would be an art major of some sort. Better yet maybe you study within science because that’s what you had always wanted to be but it wasn’t your true passion. Your routine consisted of you going to the cafe to work on your assignments but was always distracted by the interesting ppl that visit the coffee house. I’d imagine someone like Hyunjin would have caught your eye. An art subject at most but maybe an interest as you train your intensive eyes on drawing him. He would be an art major at the same uni himself and eventually something would happen with your pages falling out your book around campus and he tracks it down to you in the cafe. I think that would cute. I dunno where it would go from there but yeah that’s what fic I would see you in 💕

You listed for everyone else but no one said one for you so I thought I’d complete the list by making one🥰.

~ Lovegame anon

IT DOES 😭 maybe because it's close to.. nashville?? iDK. but credits to our loves BS anon for coining it.

omg definitely do that 😭, if it's not a lot of effort ofc— and we'd be able to talk better uwu 🥺🤌✨ (y'know what would be funny though is that if you made the LG account but kept the anon pic as your profile picture so that the asks still look like anon but it says Lovegame at the top instead, that'd be fun)

exactly ☹️ 404 is so fun, it'll probably be sparce though, just because i don't want the humor to rely on references, i know there's a lot of people who don't really normally consume a lot of group content but enjoy the group (exposing myself here) but yes, it's definitely an unwinding fic for me. it also helps that i can take more time planning out each chapter. it's like how they make SNL—they draft and film for one week and then they air it for one day. i'll probably have to do a workaround with the 10-photo limit though, maybe each episode will be split into two posts, maybe. but yeah, def a weekly thing only.

aw i'm glad you read that :((. it's my first one-shot that ever reached more than 10k words, i'm proud of that one. the haikyuu vibes are def accurate (or maybe just full-on Kuroko no Basuke 🤣) i def have zero basketball knowledge either, i literally just research things for fics so maybe you're right. there is a little bit of me in golden boy y/n~

like, literally look at the things i google for my fics:

THOSE ARE FOR FICS 😭 don't judge. and that's not even the worst of them. but yeah, for the golden boy fic, i had to search "basketball positions—"

and wow, you literally wrote a full-on fic plot for me huh 😭✨ thank you 💋 i love that. you should rEALLY consider that lovegame account even more now 👁.

and just because i appreciate it, i'll write a blurb about it~ just a lil special smth smth between you and i (and whoever else reads the ask responses jdhwjshsjs)—is it egotistic of me to write a fic about myself? maybe, but oh well, i like how you envisioned it so—

overgrown vines crawled along the worn brick walls, the smell of coffee roast filling one's sense of smell alongside the aroma of freshly baked pastries—sounds of pencil scritching on paper mingled with the click-clacking of fingers typing on a keybord. two different activities that showcased the contrast of mediums, yet both revolving around the beauty of art.

one who used her words and one who used his vision.

they've always sat in opposing tables adjacent to each other, yet with their heads so preoccupied within their own work, they've never had the chance to see the beautiful art that sat in front of them the entire time—each other.

it wasn't until the universe got tired of playing the waiting game, perhaps a sudden pull of the string of fate was the missing piece needed to complete the puzzle, when she ran out of words to type and he ran out of muses to sketch—they both looked up at the same time in hopes of pulling some semblance of inspiration from thin air—yet they found each other instead.

breaths were caught in their throat as their eyes landed on each other, it was an unexplainable feeling, a new one, yet they both understand what it meant. they just didn't know how strong it was.

he made the move first, arranging all his belongings to slowly make his way over to her table, slowly, as if wary to break the moment, but she welcomed him with a warm smile, and offered him the seat in front of her—on the same table this time.

"hi.. i'm hyunjin. h-hwang hyunjin i—"

"i know you, we're in the same class right? i can't draw for shit but your paintings are always beautiful to look at."

pleasantries exchanged over warm cups of (i don't drink coffee), more so, they couldn't believe that they were finally talking to each other.

"i'm sorry, i don't think i've caught your name." hyunjin asked as he fiddled with the ends of his sleeves out of habit.

"oh, right. it's—"

mhm mhm, i rly loved your idea lg eonnie 😩. just changed some stuff for convenience's sake, and also cuz it's me. i rly actually can't draw for shit, i'm just good at doodling— which you know, is entirely different from the ones hyunjin makes so he's def the skilled artist one. anyways, def felt weird writing MYSELF into a fic but it's a nice change, just removed my name entirely for sanity's sake 🤧. it was really interesting though, why hyunjin out of all the members 👀 do i give hyunjin-match vibes or smth—

[sunnysidewrites]

Wolf!Woozi

Requested by anon: OKAY SO IVE READ YOUR WOLF AUS AND I DESPERATELY NEED A WOOZI WOLF AU PLEASE I LOVE YOUR WRITINGS SO MUCH ASDFGHJKL 💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘

Requested by @missspookyskeleton: I'M GONNA REQUEST IF YOU'RE TAKING REQUESTS BUT TAKE YOUR TIME HONEY *slams hands on a table that randomly appeared, grabs the mic that also magiclcally appeared and breath in really loudly (ew gross)* wolf!woozi PLEASE THANK YOU SO MUCH I LOVE YOUR BLOG THERE'S NOT ENOUGH WOOZI OKAY BYE

okay this turned out alMOST AS LONG AS WOLF!WONWOO AND IM SCREAMING BC THAT WAS SUPER LONG SO??? GET READY TO READ A LONG SCENARIO AGAIN Y IKE S but anyways this is what yall have been waiting for since last month whOOPS IM SORRY!! here it is happy reading my children!!! <33333

warnings: this is a piece of garbage like wolf!wonwoo, brief mentions of gore but its barely anything bc i dont like gore/horror, mentions of violence, lots of flashbacks whOOPS, lots of vanilla ice cream!!!

His eyes are trained on his opponent sitting directly across from him

“Your move,” his voice drops an octave, a slight edge detected in it

The other man’s hands remain clasped in his lap until he slowly stretches one out

His eyes follow the man’s hands with bated breath as he grasps the smooth marbles in his fist

“No, no…. nO!!”

“hA I WIN AGAIN”

“GODDAMMIT,” he frustratingly runs his fingers in his blonde locks

“You guys really need to chill,,,,, it’s just mancala,” Seungcheol calls over his shoulder in the back of the room as he reads the papers

“Okay grandpa,,,, you’re no fun,” Jeonghan retorts, a sly grin on his face, “and don’t be so pouty, Jihoon”

“Whatever,” Jihoon mumbles as he and Jeonghan put away the board in its box, “there’s not much we can do if we’re in this dump so might as well do something a little less boring, like reading the news”

“Hey! I’m scouting for updates on our pack, you ungrateful punk. Need I remind you guys why we’re here in the first place?”

“To protect us from the hunters and keep a low profile,” everyone chorused

“Huh. Nice to know you punks are listening,” Seungcheol clucks his tongue and resumes scanning the pages

“Anyways, Jihoon and Wonwoo are gonna be the ones to restock our food supply today. You know the drill”

“Ugh fine,,,,,” Jihoon grabbed his coat on the rack while Wonwoo set aside his latest novel on the table

After securely placing a beanie all the way to their ears with a hoodie on top of it, they set out

“We look ridiculous,” Jihoon sighs

“C’mon, we have to do it,,,, and plus we can use the cold weather as an excuse,” Wonwoo reminds him

Jihoon merely shrugs and darts his eyes around the store as they round the corner, “let’s just get the stuff and leave”

When jihoon and wonwoo are lined up in the checkout aisle, jihoon suddenly hears a small gasp

“Oh my god. You got the last vanilla tub,,,,”

He turns around and sees someone pouting, pointing at the ice cream on the conveyor belt

His initial thoughts were wow. How cute -- wait we really need to lEAVE

Jihoon: *sigh* do you want it?

And your eyes liGHT UP LIKE RECEIVING A GIFT ON CHRISTMAS DAY

“But… you’re literally just about to buy it….”

“It’s fine, you’re the one who wants it more out of the both of us” he says as he screams internally

“I feel bad though,,,, ahh just forget I said anything,,,,”

Too late, he’s already thrusted it in your hands

By this time Wonwoo is looking at him expectantly with an eyebrow raised, the groceries in his hands already

He sighs again and blurts out, “if you really feel bad just take it and don’t say another word.”

He grabs the other grocery bags and leaves you staring at the tub

Hm, hoodie boy sure is grumpy, you note as the cashier scans your items

Jihoon and Wonwoo arrive back at the rundown storage warehouse lmao i know how cliche???

“Here’s your feast,” jihoon says, dropping the bags on the table

Everyone scrambles to snatch a bag of chips or the assorted candy

Joshua and vernon are like,,,, where’s the vanilla ice cream

“Jihoon gave it to some other person,” Wonwoo nonchalantly mentioned as he put the other dairy and red meat products in the fridge

Everyone freezes and stares at Jihoon

“He gave up… vanilla ice cream?”

Jeonghan is like um what jihoon being generous??? And sharing vanilla ice cream out of all things???? What happened to him

“Stop making such a big deal,” Jihoon says, exasperated as he situates himself in front of the bookshelf, “seemed like they wanted it a lot more so I just let them”

Seungcheol clears his throat and tells everyone to go back to what they were doing

He quietly approaches Jihoon and stands next to him to also “browse” the shelf

“You know why the guys are like that, Jihoon…. You know better than anyone else,” his voice drops to a barely audible whisper

Jihoon drops his eyes briefly and slightly nods, “I know… I know.”

Seungcheol sadly smiles at him and claps his shoulder, “We’re just looking out for you. That’s all we do around here, so don’t get too riled up by their antics. They have good intentions. We’re just worried about you.” He lightly pats his shoulder and leaves

Jihoon grabs a random book and settles on an old leather couch fully knowing he’s not gonna read a word of the novel he’s opened up

All he can do is try not to think about Vanilla Tub Stranger

And brush off the uneasy stir of his stomach every time he does

You go to the supermarket weekly in hopes of meeting Jihoon along the way again

And little do you know he starts to volunteer getting the food more

The guys: we see u jihoon

Jihoon: what i just wanted to,,,, get some cheese

“We’re eating steak though???”

“Shut up mingyu i’m not making you that grilled cheese then”

“???? i make those for you while you stand there and complain”

But alas!!! You guys don’t meet anymore :(((

You end up going at different times than him but it's sO CLOSE YET SO FAR

Like an hour after he leaves you enter smh

But you notice that every time you go to the ice cream aisle, there’s always one vanilla tub,,,, coincidentally,,,,

Jesus christ how many vanilla tubs do ppl buy in this au

And you can’t help but to smile to yourself

One day as you’re walking down the street you spot a familiar blonde haired boy

!!!!! it’s hoodie boy!!!!

You’re nearing each other and you smile really widely and put up your hand to wave at him

But he simply ignores you and strides right past

You’re like,,,, what,,,,, did he not remember me?

You turn around and tug on his arm

“Hey you’re hoodie boy from the supermarket right?”

He still avoids eye contact and remains stiff as cardboard

“,,,,I don’t know what you’re talking about”

“You offered me your vanilla ice cream??”

“Must have been someone else; doesn’t ring a bell,” he coldly shakes you off and stalks off

You stare at him until his back disappears around the corner of the street and you’re a deflated lil puppy :(((

Jihoon is hiding behind the nearest building, his balled up fist on the wall

“This is for the best,,, this is for the best for the both of us,” he keeps repeating

The slight worry your voice hinted, the anxious look in your eyes,,,,

It was too familiar

Jihoon only shook his head and continued on his way

He was using that day to clear his mind since there wasn’t anything really major happening

Plus he kept thinking about you

It was well into nighttime and he decided to take a detour back home

You had to run to the supermarket really quickly for a last minute meal

You ran out of ramen packs and needed to hit up the closest store

You were skeptical of going out late at night without another buddy with you but you really needed food and had to continue studying asap

“It’ll just be for a little while,” you calm yourself as you’re grabbing your coat and keys

You successfully go to the convenience store a few blocks down and you’re on your way back when the hairs all over your body start tingling

You turn around but you don’t see anyone and you’re just like,,, yI KE S and start power walking

You’re walking a little inward where a good amount of trees surround you but you can still see the city on your left

You still have one or two more blocks left when someone drAGS YOU to the side and pins you against the closest tree trunk

“You won’t scream if you know what’s good for you”

You’re just frozen in shock and terror, your arms held on top of your head and your breath hitched in your throat

The man lets out a low chuckle at your fear

“Don’t be scared… it’s just protocol,” his deep voice sends shivers up your spine as he traces your face and neck with his hand

You just want to punch this jerk and use your pepper spray but he has too much of a strong grip on you

You lift your leg to knee him but he easily stops it with a hand

“Ah ah, don’t hurt the goods,” he laughs disturbingly similar to shattered glass

You turn your head and bite down the arm that’s pinning your arms and now he’s like ok looks like we’re gonna have to do this the hard way

“You just won’t stay still, will you? This should do the trick,” he menacingly cackles as he pulls out a blue fluid glowing in a syringe

He jams his arm up your neck so you don’t easily escape and to stop whatever screams that may escape

Your eyes widen and you’re about to blindly kick his legs when the syringe gets dangerously closer to your neck

“Just… hold… still!” He presses you more against the wall as you squirm more under his touch

You can feel the needle on your skin and he’s about to push the plunger but one second your oxygen circulation is cut off and the next you hear a grunt

You can only look down at your feet where the predator is now at, holding his side

A boy is bent over the body and spits out, “still taking orders from that crap boss you have?”

“Jihoon… We meet again.”

“Like the first time wasn’t enough. Looks like you never learn from your mistakes”

“That girl didn’t have a chance anyways. Now look at where she is now,” he sneers

You see the boy’s frame tense up and his hands balling up

“Guess we’ll just have to pick up where we left off,” the boy smirks

And right before your eyes he goes from a two legged human to a wOLF ON ALL FOURS

And the man does the same thing and you’RE LIKE W HA T THE

You can’t tell who launches at who first but you’re just like o KA Y I GO TT A JET AND STUDY BYE

You’re sprinting across the dirt when one of them stops in your way and you can’t tell which one it is

He’s growling at you, his eyes gleaming in bloodlust that would match his red coat if his eyes could change color

You back away and you turn in a different direction but the other one is there too and you’re like oH JESUS CHRIST COME ON

The first one tries lunging at you but the other one tackles him first

“At each other’s throats” has never been so literal,,,, and gory yikes

The fight just continues on like that for what seems like half an hour but is probably just ten more minutes

Every time you turn to escape someone is always stOPPING YOU AND YOU’RE LIKE P L S OH MY GOD

“sTOP BLOCKING  MY WAY AND CONTINUE FIGHTING EACH OTHER I HAVE TO STUDY”

You hear one of them snort and you’re like um excuse u. I have ramen and i’m not afraid to thROW IT AT YOU

The one with the light brown fur is lowkey rolling his eyes at you

“Ok well if y’all are done fighting i gotta get home lmao so can you like,,,,, move”

Both of them revert back to their human form heavily panting

Bruises and scratches scatter all over their bodies with some black eyes and swollen cut lips

“F...fine… you’re not even worth it,” the man mutters and struggles to get up

It takes him a while to leave and you tentatively crouch down next to the blonde boy

“Okay i have absolutely no clue what just happened but,,,, thank you”

He coughs on his side as he weakly responds, “just go home. You weren’t supposed to see any of that, and now you might even be more in danger”

“.....hoodie boy?” you’re taken aback as the guy who so generously gave you up his dessert is now beaten up on the ground

“.....Go. Home.”

“But your wounds,,,,”

“We heal fast.” And sure enough you can see the majority of his scrapes and scratches slowly disappearing

“You at least owe me a good explanation to what just happened back there”

“Don’t worry about it. Go home. Now. And that’s not a suggestion”

“Just tell me--”

“I can’t have you ending up like her!”

And his tone just leaves you speechless

The amount of emotion that surged in just those words,,,,,

“I can’t…. Let that happen to you….” he says much softer

After a moment of silence, he continues

“He turned her into a wolf,,,, and brainwashed her into entering his pack. Once she had done all the orders, they disposed of her. Drained out all of her blood for their own meal and discarded her body in front of my pack’s doorstep.”

“But she was your,” you pause and try to grasp for the proper term, “love and i’m just,,,, someone who you gave ice cream to. Why are you so concerned?”

“,,,,,You’re Y/N, right?”

You’re like ??? how did you know

“You helped us out a lot. Donating food, blankets, utensils,,,, you were also the person who made us that special soup when all of us fell ill to the virus, right?”

You’re racking your brain bc you don’t remember doing that at all

But then you’re like,,,, wait a minute

“Hey, y/n, can you make that soup of yours?” Your family friend asked you, “I know a bunch of people who got sick and the cure for it needs a lot of ginger, which you incorporate so nicely without making it overbearing”

“The same guys are in refugee right now,,,, they’re just all over the place trying to seek shelter.” “Oh, they can have a couple of spare blankets I have and some plates and bowls.” “But,,,, you’re living here by yourself,,,,” “No biggie, I don’t even use half of these!” You say as you’re already dumping 4 blankets in her arms and packing a good chunk of your utensils in a bag. “Plus, you needed someone to do something, so you came to me, right?”

She only smiles to herself. “It’s no wonder he’s so smitten by you…”

“You were a part of that group?”

By now he’s healed considerably and begins sitting up and leans against the trunk

“She would always tell me to look out for you when she was unable to because of her work”

“Did you scare off those kids who picked on me?”

“Correct”

“Did you drop off my USB in the office that one time I had a presentation and forgot it?”

“That’s right”

“Did you coincidentally buy those shoes I told her I’ve always wanted?”

“U-um…. No. Okay maybe”

You laugh in spite of yourself

“Guess I finally see you as a woman now”

You stiffen at the familiarity of those words

“Jihoon, when will you see me as more than just a little sister?” you pout

“I don’t know shortie, maybe when you can take care of me?” he ruffles your hair

“Just wait until I’m able to buy a house and have a lot of money!”

He laughs and shakes his head, “we’ll see, shortie ;)”

It only hits you now that this is the same jihoon who you lost in touch after all of these years, the one who was always in the back of your mind

Wow he glowed tf up

“That…. That was when we were little kids”

“Yeah,,,, i never would have admitted it but i liked you, lopsided pigtails and all”

You notice the past tense and you look down

“....Liked? But you just said….”

“That’s right, liked.” He gently reaches out to grab ahold of your face

“Because i realized that,,,,,, i might be in love”

As you stare in his resolute eyes, you’re suddenly getting a wave of nostalgia

The same eyes who would only look at you jokingly to tease your choice of clothes

Or how you couldn’t tie your shoelaces

They’re now looking back at you with newfound feelings

Or maybe they’ve always been there

“I pretended to not recognize you because well,,,, i didn’t want you to be caught in this but looks like it’s a little too late for that. And you’re wrong”

You cock your head to the side, “about what?”

“You called her my love. If she was really my love, I wouldn’t do this”

And you’re like do what--

And he seals his words wITH A K I SS

IM SCREAMING

You’re like O H W HAT IS HAP PENI NG

But you realize that this is literally what you have been waiting for all your life

You’re kissing him back fervently, your hands gripped tightly on his shoulders to reassure yourself he is not a dream and he’s actually real and this is actually happening wo w o h go d

You’re both panting when you break away

“Wait but who’s the shORTIE NOW”

“shUT UP,” he pouts and pulls you in agAIN