#what if they all hate me and try to kill me cause they think I’m an over achiever
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▮ make it to the morning. / pedri gonzalez x black!reader
ᝰ word count: ≈800
ᝰ summary: you and your boyfriend get into an argument, but he doesn’t take you seriously.
ᝰ yap!: umm dont hate me for this one! and yes this is based off of “make it to the morning” by pnd, im OBSESSEDDD. dedicated to pedri’s gf @planetpedri &&. my loves @ar4ujos , @halfwayhearted , @szalovebot !
Your boyfriend Pedri was driving while you sat in the front seat. You had already had a bad day at work, and all while you were telling him this, he got distracted by his phone.
“Are you fucking serious?” You frustratedly chuckled, looking over at him.
His eyes stopped on you briefly before looking back at the road, pulling into the neighborhood of his house. “What?” He glanced at his phone again, then looked back up.
“I’m trying to talk to you and you’re fucking texting and driving, trying to get us both killed.” It almost sounded like you were joking, the way your tone was playful, laced with the slightest bit of anger and annoyance.
“I’m just… asking Gavi about the plans for tomorrow. I’m sorry, babe, keep talking,” Pedri responded, this time looking over at you for longer and setting his phone down. He kept his gaze on the street though, driving through slowly.
You raised a brow, asking, “What plans?”
The dark haired man stayed silent, his eyes now locked on what was in front of him.
“Hello? I’m speaking,” you snapped a finger in front of his face, waiting for his answer.
“Me, Gavi, and some of the guys wanna go out tomorrow,” he shrugged, answering nonchalantly.
You had to stop yourself from snapping at him, instead saying, “So instead of listening to me tell you about my day you were texting your friends about plans I didn’t even know about. ‘Kay, Pedri.”
“I was gonna tell you,” Pedri immediately replied, a defensive sound in his voice.
“Bullshit,” you rolled your eyes, looking away from him and out of your window.
He didn’t say anything for a few seconds. As he pulled into the driveway, he said, “Y/n. Y/n, talk to me.”
You didn’t respond, getting out of the car immediately, grabbing your stuff and bringing it up to the door. You fiddled with the key trying to unlock the door, as a frustrated Pedri walked up to you.
“Hello? I’m speaking,” he retorted, a pit of anger piling up in his stomach. “I don’t get why you’re mad at me.”
Again, dodging him, you unlocked the door and walked into the house. You didn’t even bother to grab your keys afterwards, making him do it. You set your bags down on the kitchen counter and headed upstairs into his bedroom to sit down.
He knew where you were, following you up there after he locked the front door and set his stuff down. “Babe,” he tried again as he walked into the bedroom. He sat himself next to you, apologizing. “Baby, I’m sorry. Tell me what I did.”
You scoffed at first, but when you saw the upset look in his eyes, you decided to just answer him. “I was trying to fucking talk to you and you were ignoring me.”
“I was trying to get me and Gavi’s plans straight,” he defended himself. “I was still listening. Dios mío, llevas las cosas tan lejos.” He mumbled that last part under his breath, hoping you didn’t hear him.
You eyed him, knowing you didn’t fully understand what he was saying, but could grasp some parts of it. “Excuse you? Speak up.”
“Can you just save this for the morning? I’m tired, babe,” He groaned.
That set you off—who did he think he was trying to push off a problem he caused? “Fine. Bye, Pedro.” You got up from the bed, walking out of the room and downstairs.
“Wait, no, Y/n,” his voice sounded from behind you. “I don’t wanna fight, please.”
You ignored him, your face burning with anger. You began grabbing your stuff off of the counter, along with your keys Pedri had set next to the items.
“Y/n,” he gently grabbed your wrist, nearly forcing you to turn around.
“What?” You shouted at him, turning around to see… a ring?
He looked at you, really looked at you for the first time that night. He couldn’t help but smile, seeing your reaction. “This was the plan.”
“A promise ring?” Suddenly your anger died down, being replaced with a sense of adoration.
“We obviously can’t get married yet, but I want you to be the one when we get to that point. I wanted this to be a bigger surprise obviously, but I didn’t want you going home mad at me,” he spoke softly, no longer having a grasp of your wrist. “It’s only you, Y/n. It’ll only ever be you. I want you to promise that it’ll only be me.”
You hugged him before you could say anything, wrapping your arms around his neck. With your face nuzzled into him, you mumbled, “I love you forever. I promise.”
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shared moments (dabi)
a handful of shared moments between you and your maybe more than friend, touya todoroki, the flame villain.
this is a prequel to the first fic i posted, pheonix, but it could be read as a standalone !
wc: 2.8k
reader is not described but is implied to have a quirk that makes them colder. i also imply that they're a nurse who frequently works with burn patients, including dabi's victims.
cw: 18+ ONLY !!! no smut, just kissing, grinding, and shirts come off but it ends pretty quickly after that. dabi accidentally wounds reader (a small burn from trying to wake him from a nightmare), mentions of abuse, murder, dying, and nausea. soft yet emotionally stunted and avoidant dabi
playlist: maybe by flower face, zombie by everglow, voidstar and longlegs by grim salvo
He’s shaking, head in your lap. You think he might be crying, but his hands are covering his face as he curls up as tight as he can. Dabi didn’t usually spend the night, but on rare occasion you can wrangle him into sleeping a few hours before running off who knows where. Tonight had been fun, daresay cozy, watching bad movies under a blanket so you could use him as a space heater and he could use you as an icepack.
It’s near four in the morning, far past when he usually sneaks out of your tiny apartment, when you awoke to his distress. He’d been squirming on his side of your too-small bed, mumbling and whimpering unconsciously. Even now, you don’t think he’s realized the small burn on your arm from trying to wake him, but you don’t move to soothe it; you’re too busy trying to soothe him. You rub his side over his shirt and pet a hand through his spiky hair even though he’s long since stopped shaking. You pretend you don’t care you have work in a few hours.
Now, he’s completely motionless, arms fallen to the cushion of the mattress. His voice is raspier than normal when he finally speaks, “…Sorry about that.”
“’S okay. I’ve seen worse.”
You both know he’s caused your ‘worse’.
“Do you wanna tell me what’s going on up here?” You tap your fingers softly against his temple. It’s a miracle he hasn’t moved yet.
“Don’t think that’s something you’d wanna hear about.”
“You can tell me anyways,” you can practically hear him go over the notion in his head. You met almost a year and you hardly know anything about the man besides his preferred snacks and the types of movies he likes to make fun of.
He thinks for a bit before stating, “you’ve never asked about my scars.”
You hum in agreement. The healed tissue is naturally textured but worsened from insufficient aftercare. The skin grafts look like they were done by someone with medical experience, at least. “Were you dreaming about when you got them?” The scar tissue on his face always made it look like the flames had tried to take him in its hands; like it wanted to soothe him. Console him. You want to do the same.
“Kinda,” he says after another long pause, like he’s trying to find the words, “maybe more like ‘why’.”
He can’t see you frown at that. You don’t like the implication it carries.
He’s quiet for a long time while you brush through his hair. It’s gotten longer- you think you can see blonde roots peak through the inky black.
“My old man…real shit guy,” he takes in a shaky breath and subtly curls deeper into your lap, “I’m gonna kill him one day.”
(You didn’t think he was serious, then.)
“All he cares about is power. He bought my ma so he could create a child more powerful than him. I’m the oldest of four- and his biggest failure,” you wince at the way he chuckles, “It’s funny. He got what he wanted. My youngest brother is a prodigy. He’s one of the top students at U.A.,” Dabi stops again, like he has to prepare himself for what he’s about to say, “I hated that kid for so long. Tried to kill him when he was a toddler, wanted to prove I was better than him. When I was twelve or thirteen I told dear old dad I got stronger,” another pause “He didn’t care,” another pause, like he’s debating telling you the rest at all, “I burned down half a forest, woke up three years later. The fucker who fixed me up showed me pictures of my funeral and everything. Ma got institutionalized not long after…but I gave myself a new name, since I died that day.”
“What was his name?” You ask impulsively. You wish you could take those words back, stuff them in your mouth and swallow them down
“Who’s?” He looks up.
“The boy who died.”
Dabi looks away again, contemplates before relenting, “Touya. Touya Todoroki”
“Touya sounds like a sweet kid. I hope he’s resting easy.”
It’s like the words flipped a switch in him. He shoots to sit up straight. His eyes are angry. Scared.
“You don’t know shit about him.”
“That’s not the point.”
He gets up, paces the length of the bed a few times, stops, looks at the ground, “You don’t know what you’re talking about. You don’t know shit about me.”
“And whose fault is that?” You really need to learn when to shut your stupid mouth.
He looks up. Sees you fully for the first time since waking. He can see the welt he caused on your arm in his post-nightmare panic. His anger dies. His eyes widen. You reach to slap your hand over it to shield it from view, but he has his jeans on and his jacket and boots in hand before you can find words to say. He’s out the door before you can ask him not to leave.
(You call out of work that day. You won’t hear from him for three weeks.)
Later that day, the search results for Touya Todoroki hurt as bad as you expected them to. There aren’t many paparazzi pictures of him, only a handful of him with his dad at award ceremonies.
His dad. Pro hero Endeavor.
The news coverage of his son’s death is minimal, and it’s mostly about Endeavor taking a leave of absence from hero duties to grieve with his family, but the obituary is public. The white haired boy in the picture looks so young. It’s not very detailed aside from denoting that his funeral was a private ceremony.
You open a new tab and search for fire related quirk malfunctions or natural disasters from around the same time. Its not hard to narrow down that the forest fire that destroyed Sekoto Peak was Dabi’s doing. The flames had been massive and unnaturally hot, nearly impossible to contain. There was barely anything left besides charred bone fragments from wildlife and the partial jawbone of the only human casualty they could find. The victim is unnamed, but it says the police were able to identify them through dental records and bring closure to the family.
There’s a handful of pictures of Endeavor at the scene. They make your stomach churn.
A third tab. Endeavor. There are news articles about his most recent achievements and a few about his youngest son, Shoto, who recently passed the entrance exams into U.A., just like Dabi said.
You feel nauseous.
It’s so comfy laying here wrapped around him like a koala. He’s cold and hot at the same time. There’s one hand cradling the back of your head to his chest while the other rubs your back over the blanket he draped over you.
You don’t usually let him in when work gets you like this. He’s usually the cause, being the most prolific fire quirked villain in the country, but you felt like you needed him today. A little boy had come in with his parents after his first quirk manifestation. All you could see was a young Touya Todoroki when you looked at him. Now all you feel is the pain you feel for the real thing who has you cradled in his arms like you’re more than maybe a friend.
Dabi is prickly when it comes to touch- despite the nerve damage, his scars are sensitive- but for you, he makes exceptions, especially since this is his first time seeing you since his meltdown last month. When he woke up in his dingy-ass apartment today, he knew he had to see you, knew something was wrong. His gut was right. You practically collapsed crying in his arms when you opened the door.
You’ve barely said anything since he’s settled the two of you down on your bed. Every time he thinks about saying something, you burrow impossibly closer into his chest like if you try hard enough you can crawl in his ribs and clean out all the ash and soot that make him up.
He wants to apologize for how he left. He wants to tell you he was scared, that he’s still scared, because he’s never let anyone get close the way you have, and he doesn’t know why he yearns for you to be closer. It’s the only time he ever wishes things had gone differently. If he was closer to a normal guy, less of one of the most wanted villains in the country, maybe he’d let himself be happy to be known by you.
But the only thing Dabi can do is destroy. He burns too hot to be anyone’s light.
Dabi is ruthless. He’s a monster, a villain, a killer; there’s nothing that could clean the blood from his hands.
That doesn’t stop him from pretending things are different, even if just for a moment. You’re naturally cooler to the touch and he finds it hard to imagine ever choosing to be anywhere but in your arms. It’s such an unfamiliar feeling.
Dabi’s never had to comfort someone before. He’s never really wanted to, either.
He isn’t one to be soft or kind or comforting. It’s all so confusing. How do you drag this out of him? Why is he so content with this moment? Something about you makes him different. He doesn’t know what to do with that.
He’s scared. He’s angry. He’s unhappy.
You pull yourself away from him completely, scooting to lay on your back on the other side of your bed.
“Sorry,” you mumble, “you can go now. That was probably really uncomfortable for you. You can leave now, if you want.”
Your eyes are so empty. He’s never seen you like this. He doesn’t know what to do. He thinks he wants to stay, make his last visit up to you with more time tonight, but would you rather he go? Should he ask about what upset you? This is so new to him.
He leaves.
The next time he’s over, you pretend to not notice the tension in the air. You move around in your usual sync, gathering snacks and scrolling through the worst rated movies you can find. You feign obliviousness to the way his eyes linger on you for longer than usual and curl up on the opposite side of the choice from him, like the months of slowly shifting closer to each other didn’t happen.
The jokes are bored and the laughs are empty.
He doesn’t spend the night. You don’t ask him to. He doesn’t know why he feels so hollowed out when he leaves.
A few weeks later, after watching movies and ignoring elephants in rooms, you fall asleep. Dabi waits, lets whatever’s playing continue to run while he watches you breathe in and out at a steady rhythm.
The credits roll. He turns off the T.V. and welcomes the darkness lit only by the city as he gets up to lay you down on your little couch. He’s never done this for you before- he doesn’t know why he’s doing it now. Your eyes flutter open as he kisses your forehead and tucks you into your blanket you keep out here.
(He did it without thinking, like it was natural, a habit. He was a big brother, once. He hadn’t realized that part of him survived.)
You look up at him as he stares down at you, eyebrows furrowed at his surprised expression. His eyes flicker to your lips without his permission. He’s already leaning over you, it’d be so easy to crawl on top of you, kiss you, wherever and however you want.
He doesn’t know what possesses him to do it. Maybe it’s Himiko’s insistence he grow up and take the risk, maybe it’s a moment of weakness where he allows himself to forget who and what he is, but he’s pressing a soft kiss to your lips without realizing. The contact makes your head jerk back, eyes wide in shock, surprise, wonder. You look at him like there’s something worthy of being looked at. His mouth moves to apologize, but you’re shooting your hands to hold his scarred cheeks and pressing you lips to his before he can try. Your skin is so cold against his had surprised at the lack of steam. He thinks you’re the prettiest thing he’s ever seen.
He doesn’t reciprocate in his shock. His response is even further delayed by the fact that he’s never done this before. He feels like a teenager- or what he imagines what being a teenager under more normal circumstances would allow him. As you move to pull away, afraid you’ve somehow overstepped, Dabi is snapped out of his shock, and he’s pulling you back in. His kiss is messy, wet, spit slick as his tongue licks into your mouth with no hesitation. The taste of his urgency is unexpected but he feels so incredible you can hardly stand it. You revel in the way his dull nails bite into your skin when you whimper at the sensation.
His hands are heavy as they make their way down your body, nearly pushing like he needs a constant reminder that this is real. Before you know it, he’s on the couch, on top of you, pushing at your shirt and you’re pulling it over your head in compliance. Dabi takes the moment to yank off his own; his torso is a marble of normal and scarred skin with a shiny barbell through each nipple. You wonder briefly if the metal is hot like the rest of his skin as his lips crash back into yours. One hand in your hair, the other on your waist- he’s pushing you down, pulling you in, until he's all but crushing you in his desperation.
You moan when he lets up, “Dabi-“
“No, no- don’t call me that. I don’t want to feel like a villain with you,” he’s equally breathless, practically heaving above you.
“…Touya?”
Your uncertainty is immediately discarded when he fully moans at the sound of his given name on your lips, “yes, yes, thank you-“ and he’s kissing you again, cradling your face like you’re porcelain but grinding down like you’re the farthest thing from fragile.
His grip tightens when the pressure of his hips makes you moan.
The weight of his body makes you dizzy. His lips and hands move down your neck, licking, biting, and sucking at all the skin newly exposed to him and it feels so good you don’t now what to do with yourself. You decide on shoving your hands in his hair; you’re pulling it at the root when he bites down next, and he’s moaning into your throat like it might kill him to be quiet.
What does he want from me? The question crashes through your brain like a bullet. You don’t know if you want to actually ask. Would it be so bad to let this happen, just to have him close like this? Is the burden of wanting from afar easier to carry than having him halfway? Yes. Of course it is.
Your sudden unresponsiveness stills him. He pulls away to find your eyes distant and face neutral.
“Touya?” You ask after a silent minute filled with his thumbs rubbing circles in your waist, “what did that mean? To you, for us?”
He gulps, “I don’t know.”
He hadn’t thought this far ahead. He hadn’t thought at all.
“You don’t know,” you echo.
He’s off you before you can decide what to make of his answer.
“Sorry, don’t know why I did that- sorry,” you think you hear as he fumbles around for his coat and his boots. You don’t say anything. You don’t even look at him. Instead, you focus on the ceiling it’s almost too dark to see. You think you hear him pause at your door, but your head is so loud and intelligible you aren’t paying attention.
The static doesn’t block out the sound of your front door shutting, though.
(Neither of you realize he left his shirt behind until after he’s already out the door. You pretend you resist the urge to cuddle it to catch his scent on it, and he will pretend he doesn’t imagine you doing just that.)
Ever the coward, Touya runs. He throws up his shame once he’s in his own apartment. He knows he shouldn’t have left. He didn’t want to- but he didn’t know how to stay either.
He hates himself more than he has in a long time for tonight.
His burner buzzes in his pocket. It’s Shigaraki. plans in motion.
He doesn’t think you’ll forgive him for doing this, but it’s been building since before he met you. It’s not like he has any sort of life or future to look forward to anyways. It’s not like he gives you much to miss anyways.
Soon. Endeavor’s head. Soon.
dividers by @/issysh3ll and @/thecutestgrotto
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#dabi bnha#dabi mha#dabi x reader#dabi angst#mha angst#bnha angst#touya todoroki angst#touya todoroki x reader#ʚїɞ dabi#ʚїɞ lauren wrote what
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Maybe I need to write my own S5 fanfic in which JJ comes back and Kiara is by his side again, just to get over this… ‘cause I gotta be honest, one of the things that’s crushing my soul the most is how at the moment I can’t even read Jiara fics, I can’t see JJ’s face on my timeline and not even read his name without seeing him die in front of my eyes and remember that he doesn’t have happiness anymore.
It just makes me so fucking sad that I can’t even think about my comfort character not even in ff anymore and not even watch his scenes back in my comfort show because all I can think about is how he doesn’t exist anymore and he can never be there anymore, never be part of the story anymore and never have that beautiful future we all imagined for him. They took what brought the most happiness to us and turned it into what brings us the most pain. That’s why I don’t even find enjoyment in OBX anymore altogether, they took away what brought that joy.
What I hate the most is how what was my comfort and one of the things I was most passionate about just some days ago, now it’s completely ruined for me. I loved writing and reading for Jiara, it brought me so much comfort and joy and now I can’t bring myself to do it, one of my favorite things to actually do in my daily life and one of the pieces of fiction I was most attached to just ripped away in 5 minutes.
I’ll have to try and write an alternative version in which JJ is still here and has that life he deserves just to cope, even just for myself so I can go back to connect with my comfort character and go back to enjoy those stories in which HE LIVES LIFE and that I loved through the years and that spark my writing.
Maybe I’m wrong and I should just be speaking for myself but I think that for many of us they killed Outer Banks with JJ.
#I REFUSE TO LIVE IN A WORLD WHERE JJ IS DEAD#GIVE ME MY COMFORT CHARACTER BACK 😭😭😭#BRING BACK JJ#outer banks#obx#jj maybank#kiara carrera#jiara#jiara ff#jiara fic#jj x kiara#obx netflix#obx4#obx s4#outer banks netflix
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The problems with English classes is that I am a yapper and this is great for discussions but also terrible terrible for writing
#call me Quasimodo the way i’m typing hunched over#also I get so self conscious about writing too much compared to the other people in my group#what if they all hate me and try to kill me cause they think I’m an over achiever#this is something that could happen why is no one talking about this
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I alluded to this in tags awhile ago but like. IK continuity doesn’t work this way and when things shifted from kooky and silly 40s stuff with psas scattered to like dark brooding whatever we’re supposed to take it as like either time passing with some hand waving to personalities or ‘it was always like this for them trust’ but thinking about dick specifically going from holy galloping grasshoppers Batman to dealing with Bruce in spyral and shit is so so so sad I can’t articulate it well rn but like everyone kinda agrees the shift happened after two face and jason but like no dick saw it all he saw it while it happened he saw Bruce taking tim to baseball games and then gaslighting him at 16 he saw the man who’d take care of a random baby on the fly threaten to send his youngest son back to the league he saw the man who helped usher in a new era of young heroes treat Steph like shit he saw the man who inspired hope for a future in civilians heroes and enemies alike take advantage of cass’ suicidal thoughts and separation from her own humanity he saw everything and he just has to. Deal. To everyone else this is just Bruce and ppl like Tim and cass justify it to an extent bc they love him and get exasperated and when Dick is angry but how couldn’t Dick be angry? That’s his dad and he’s being so fucking mean and idk I’m rambling
#i promise this is better thought out on the daily Im so so tired rn autocorrect is saving me#and It’s like the lighthearted era of the 40s smacking someone across the face into shit like throwing him into Jason’s memorial#like It’s not even whiplash bc it’s always happened it’s just. aaruhdsjak#and this is why I hate the entire thing where Bruce does nothing and it’s ALL terrible writing like#they had Superman doing corporal punishment bro idk#and not saying that’s good or necessary today I’m just saying unfortunately for Bruce Stans literally everyone is shaped by his behavior#It’s why they’re so fucked to eachother too#like the reason perfect dad bruce who’s only issue is miscommunication is annoying bc u#sets up every following issue tk ve of the same vein#he and Jason DONT have genuine morality clashes that usually end up violent and beLetha#near lethal bc they’re both secure in their own righteousness#It’s ‘they need to talk and Jason needs to call alfie and gl#go to Sunday brunch and Bruce needs to be okay with killing the really really bad ppl :(‘#like no bro sorry they’re not as wishy washy as u 🙄#that’s a joke#Im not saying bruxe should hit his kids I’m just saying when he does it’s not automatically the writer doesn’t know him#they might know him all too well actually#also it’s just the way it’s framed for me sorry I think Conflict is interesting#so bruce growing up (at 60 lmao) and dick just having to deal with it is sooo#like idk IK dc is trying to happy family Damian and Bruce rn but to me Bruce DID get somewhat better but Damian can’t ades#address tough shit without feeling luke he’s dragging it and rlly he should be grateful they’re turning a blind eye tk his mistakes so he#goes along with it#pretend the soulless ‘i hate you bc I’m insecure and secretly think ur my favorite Drake!’ is actually#‘i know the role I need to play in order to keep things smooth and if u#i talk to any of you genuinely I’ll explode and also you’ll hate me and also I think I’ll hate you I think I already do so’#that’s my coping#and thats for me personally like this entire post Is how I personally like to see it#i like happy go lucky batfam in microdoses except WFA y will not be forgiven for what u did to Duke#also for the og post I have a whole thing about how Bruce’s attempt to separate the man and the mask causes him to do crazy shit to his kids#but diff time THATS just how I get my middle between incorrect quotes bruce and dudebro bruce tbh
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really evil that the universe decided I wouldn’t like eating fish of all things. there’s so few big categories of food i dislike and im like. why did it have to be that one. why couldn’t i just not like. idk. celery or something. it’s so unfair
#so many beautiful dishes in the world with fish in them and most of the time i just have to look at them sadly. yearning#hate when people are like uhh??? you don’t like fish??? what the hell!!!! like man i hate it too don’t rub it in#1/3 of the time it’s the texture 1/3 of the time it’s the taste 1/3 of the time it’s both#I’ll still eat sushi I guess cause you don’t really register the fish much amongst all the other components + the raw fish#they tend to use the most aren’t overwhelmingly fishy#and some raw fish in sushi just sorta registers like raw meat and i love me some rare ass meat#so that’s sort of an exception. if there’s a tempura option though I’m getting that one#not just cause it’s not fish also cause tempura fucks#but anyway#not sure why this came to mind#the restaraunt i work at always has a few fish dishes on the menu every season and it’s always so sad that I can’t try them and enjoy them#cause all the dishes chef comes up with are really fucking good#kibumblabs#literally tho the only other category of food I can think of that I don’t like (if you even wanna call it that) is tomatoes and that’s just#like. raw tomatoes that aren’t part of an integrated dish#like i won’t bite into a whole tomato it’d kill me#but yeah that’s not really the same since I’ll eat most tomato based stuff. except tomato soup I guess
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~ ~ ~
#another day where I’m stuck refreshing this app and waiting for you to talk to me#in some ways I wish I were so busy through my day that I didn’t have time to check this and/or talk to you#since that means your life is way more exciting than mine on a day to day basis and that sucks cause I’m always kinda bored#I just miss you and didn’t get to talk to you for so long and wish you had more space in your life for me#it’s a constant problem for me that I just can’t seem to get over and I don’t know why#why can’t I get you out of my head? why can’t I stop thinking about you all the time? why do I need to talk to you so badly?#why do we have this connection that I can’t seem to live without?#why did you build things up so much and make me feel so many things for you and then basically just throw me away?#why can’t I move on and just be happy to still have you as my friend?#why is there always going to be this tension in my head where all I want is to have you choose me again?#I can’t talk about this with anyone else so I’m stuck just posting the same things here over and over inanely#I hate to keep repeating myself but I’m so tired of these thoughts all piling up on me constantly and trying to kill me every day#I don’t know what the fuck else to do anymore and I don’t know how to get you out of my mind#personal
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Hey I liked your writing on reader having to get in between Wolverine and Deadpool all the time 😆 it made me think what it would be like if they were crushing on you and there is a rivalry between them. If you could write what they’d do to win your favor or what shenanigans that would come with it 😂 subtle or not
These two weren’t fond of sharing.
So when the other finds that they have similar feelings towards you, the outcome is never good.
They’re childish in a way where if either Logan or Wade was coincidentally standing too close to you, the other was bound to notice and make a scene out of it, all the while you wished you were anywhere else in that moment.
The pair couldn’t get along even if they bothered to try as sooner or later they’d end up stabbing each other just because the other one was breathing too loudly or just merely existing.
And yet their feelings towards you ends up causing Logan and Wade to butt heads more often, especially if you were constantly teaming up together, with you often being their meditator in all their conflicts.
Wade was more vocal and borderline flirty when it came to interacting with you, he would crack jokes, boop you on the nose or even playfully smack you on the ass just to hear your yelp in surprise and become all flustered.
‘Plush ass you’ve got there, babe! wouldn’t mind laying my head on it sometime and use it as a beautiful fluffy pillow.’ - Wade, skipping away.
Wade could be quite clingy at times so there would be moments where you can barely escape the guy as he hanging on your side like a koala bear.
You: Wade can you let go.
Wade: and let go of my emotional support person? *gasp* Do you want me to die?
You: well considering how fast you regenerate, you technically can’t die-
Wade: do you hate me? Do you think I’m clingy?
You: no- well yes but-
Wade: you hate me!
Wade can be dramatic and the only way to shut him up is to just let him be in close proximity of you and allow him to talk your ear off about how good a dog parents you’d be to Dogpool.
Dogpool is your weakness, you could never say no to Dogpool and Wade knows this like the back of his hand and will use this as leverage over wolverine.
After all It’s not like he has a version of himself that was an actual wolverine or maybe even a honey badger in yellow spandex. So Wade counts this as a win on his end.
Logan on the other hand would be more subtle with his approach, even though to Wade, Logan’s subtly was as an dopey cow standing in a field of grass with how the scruffier man tended to keep by your side protectively; so much so that he might as well start growling at every person who ever laid eyes on you in general.
He’s a guard dog of a man in every sense of the word but how that came to be was from a whole lot of trauma and loosing people he’s ever cared about, so needless to say he won’t act like he’s interested in you at first, his heart had been wounded about as much as his body has and even had the mental scars to prove it.
He’s lived a long life of pain, fighting, suffering and heartache. He’s not going to falter so easily until you did something that made him feel safe enough to fall for you.
Once he has however it was impossible to go about the mission without him always wanting to stand guard by your side when he sees someone he doesn’t fully trust, always using his body as a shield for your own as Logan knew he could handle much more punishment then you could. So he’d rather avoid you being grievously hurt by any means possible.
He’d probably scold you if you ever were hurt as he was afraid that he might loose you, yet his hands were gentle but firm as they worked to patch your wound so it’d heal properly.
Wolverine: you’re an idiot you know.
You: wow I really feel the love over here.
Wolverine: *huffs* you expect me to kiss your ass when what you did was reckless and could’ve killed you? *his hands linger on your own even long after he’s done patching you up as though committing your warmth to memory*
Logan is a secret softy who wouldn’t push you away if you were to ever fall asleep on him, he’d grumble but that’s about it.
He’d even toss you his jacket if you were to ever complain about being too cold or leave it somewhere for you to take yourself, again he’d act like he didn’t want you to but he actually did with how he almost smiled upon seeing you looking comfortable in his jacket.
Logan is evidently more subtle about his crush on you then Wade is, or so he’d likes to think but Wade can messily tell he’s smitten when he sees how Logan’s eyes were quick to follow you in a crowded room with protectiveness and adoration.
Wade: aww has our dear friend taken the stick out of your ass and you fell in love?
Logan: *growls* fuck off Wade.
Wade: *holds his hands to his lips and gasps* oh my gosh! You have! Me too!
Logan: *looks at him* you what?!
Wade: yeah cats out of the bag, I like them too wolvie. you’re not the only one to find them cute, how close minded of you seriously.
They can’t share to save their lives, I’ve mentioned this before but they genuinely can’t even if they tried because one is them was bound to get jealous and try to take you away from the other.
Wade: do you really want to be near me grumpy all the time? Yawn fest much.
You: stop riling him up, you’re making Logan mad. Why are you like this?
Wade: maybe because you deserve to be in the company of someone who isn’t still unhealthily hung up on his previous red headed lover.
Logan: you shut your fucking mouth.
Wade: see! He’s not denying it!
You: I’m going to go now. *leaves*
Logan: you should make full time fuck head your job.
Wade: and you should make full time teenage brooder in a full grown man’s body who still isn’t over his first breakup yours.
The shenanigans that would occur between these two would be headache inducing to say the least.
The constant fights that would break out between them that you’d have to break up.
The bickering over who gets to act like a couple with you on missions. They might even play rock, paper, scissors multiple times behind your back.
Wade probably tried to trip Logan up in front of you once but it backfired when Logan made Wade trip up instead as he puts a hand on your lower back and guided you away from the poor Merc with a mouthful of dirt.
#marvel x you#marvel x reader#marvel imagine#marvel imagines#marvel x y/n#mcu x you#mcu x reader#mcu imagines#mcu imagine#deadpool x you#deadpool imagines#deadpool imagine#deadpool x reader#wade wilson imagines#wade wilson x reader#wade wilson imagine#wolverine imagine#wolverine imagines#wolverine x reader#logan howlett x you#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett imagine
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been thinking about dating college!art and you get into a really big fight until he decides to show up at your dorm *cough* make up sex *cough*
i had wayy too much fun with this… SMUT 17+
“i’m still mad at you, you know.” there’s no real bite to your bark, not when your voice is breathless, your cheeks are flushed, and your hands keep running through his hair.
“yeah, i know,” art drawls, his voice softening. he says it because a part of him knows it’s true, but he can’t help the faint smile that grows on his face. he knows you won’t stay mad for long, but he still feels the weight of his guilt pressing down on him. he’d do anything to make it up to you. with every press of his lips, he mutters a quiet “i’m sorry,” against your skin, then grazes his teeth along your ankle before making his way up your leg.
he’d thought of a million different things to say to you, how he would stand his ground or cave to your defences. but all of it was thrown out the window the moment you opened that door. you were wearing his shirt—or maybe it was patrick’s, maybe even tashi’s—and a pair of panties. the sight of your messy desk, covered in textbooks, notebooks, and your open laptop, reminded him you were doing homework, or trying to. but the ache in his chest at the thought of you hating him was overwhelming.
it was killing him knowing you were upset, and he was the cause of it. that’s why art had taken a trip to the nearest farmer’s market the moment he was off the court, and he bought you flowers and your favourite snack and knocked on your door.
now the flowers are forgotten by your desk, the snacks on the floor, and you’re still trying to keep up the act that you’re mad at art. but the truth is, you can’t even remember what you were mad at him about in the first place.
the way he looks at you, with such earnest remorse and tenderness, makes it hard to hold onto your anger. you sigh, running your fingers through his hair again, feeling the tension between you start to melt away.
“i hate how you do this to me,” you whisper, your voice barely audible. art’s eyes meet yours, and he pauses, his lips hovering just above your knee.
“i know,” he says again, his voice filled with a mix of regret and hope. his hands roam up the sides of your thighs, fingers brushing your ass before they turn into the curve between your legs. “but i’m here now,” he presses a kiss against your hot skin again, making his way up, up, and up. “and i want to make it right.”
as he continues his gentle kisses, moving slowly and tenderly, you feel your defences crumbling. the anger that once felt so strong is now just a distant memory. art’s presence, his touch, his voice, his words, all of him- it’s all you can think about.
he looks up at you, sitting on the bed while he kneels before you. you’re watching him, waiting for his next move when he is still between your legs.
when you run your nails against his scalp, art doesn't bother hiding the quiet whimper that slips past his lips before he closes his eyes and leans his head towards your arm.
he lets you hold him while his hands trail up your sides, reaching and groping anything he can before his fingers tug at your panties, and he carefully slips them off you.
when he kisses your clit, you rest your leg over his shoulder, heel pressing against the muscles of his back. his arms wrap around your thighs, pulling you closer while he starts to eat you out.
art starts slow, calculated strokes of his tongue against you, running it in tight circles against your clit, dipping it lower when he gets a little more confident. when you arch your back and whine, pushing his head closer so you can ride his face, he starts to pick up the pace, hoping to hear that sound come out of you again.
when his tongue pokes at your cunt, it draws a loud moan out of you, blood rushing to your ears. “fuck, art,” you whimper, grinding against his face. “feels so good.”
art seems to like it more than you, eyes closed in bliss, humming and moaning against your cunt, each vibration from his mouth making you spiral. his hips buck up into nothing, but he doesn't seem to mind as his hands hold onto you tighter, as if he is afraid to lose you.
“you’re so pretty like this,” you barely manage to get out, your heart thumping against your chest.
art moans again at your praise and finally opens his eyes to meet your burning gaze. his low, nearly pathetic whine with his eyes on you was what it took to push you over the edge.
art lets you ride it out, he lets you grind against his face, he lets you use him again and again and again until you’ve had your fill and there is nothing left of him.
and when you cup his cheeks and bring his face to yours and kiss him like you have a one-track mind, he has an inkling feeling that you're not mad at him anymore. you press your forehead against his, hand cupping the back of his neck, and he lets out a sigh and you breathe it in.
“i’m sorry,” he whispers, one more time, to make sure you know he means it.
you smile, offering him half a shrug and another kiss. “just let me return the favour.”
#and just like that#i officially enter my challengers era#art’s lockerroom#art donaldson smut#art donaldson x reader#art donaldson#art challengers#art donaldson x you#art donaldson x female reader
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Lucifer Morningstar X Fallen Exorcist Reader
Ever since his split from Lilith Lucifer has been a reck feeling like no one can love him, need him, or understand him again
You have been an exorcist for a couple of thousand years now being one of the best exorcists Heaven could ever ask for
But deep down you always felt bad for those you had killed feeling like yes Hell is for those who have done wrong but what about those who did the wrong things for the right reasons
So on the next extermination day you tried to run away from it all but when Adam found out he took it upon himself to kill you
You were able to get away before Adam could finish you off but nothing could prepare you for meeting Lucifer himself
For some reason Lucifer took you in and helped you out and yes you did come out to him about you being a “fallen angel” and your ideals on heaven, earth, and hell
Lucifer just sat there and listened and for the first time since Lilith someone understood him
Now at first you two became roommates in a way, mostly helping him out with his work, giving him duck ideas, being his bodyguard and secretary, and you did try to push him into talking to Charlie more but you understood on why he couldn’t do it himself
You did face palm as when he called her all he did was tell her to have that meeting with Adam, at least it’s a start
Charlie dose know of you but saw you more as her fathers secretary or his best friend, like an aunt, she is happy how you think there is a way to get sinners in to heaven and how you told her if she ever needs help or to talk to someone you are just quick call
Lilith dose know of you and you may have never seen her face to face she is happy someone is keeping her ex happy
Now if you ever get together it would be the best for the both of you cause I’m sure you would want to confess first but with the thoughts of you killing his people and Lilith, it just made you hesitant but with a simple duck jester (making a duck quack an “I love you”) Lucifer confessed his feelings to you
Charlie I think would be happy for her dad to have found someone and yes at first she did see you as her aunt but she is happy to call you her step parent sand she isn’t afraid of telling everyone that either
That’s one of the major reason on why Lucifer likes you, his daughter loves you like a parental figure
This Lucifer is just a sad boy so if you just sit there and cuddle him he would love you forever and if add words of praise he is just melting
Definitely will vent to you cause he is that comfortable around you and he is happy that you feel the same way when you vent
You always support his duck creations and yes late nights would consist of you two role playing with the ducks, when you two started dating he made three duck versions of you, him, and Charlie all matching clothes sitting next to each other, this man had a whole collection of duck versions of you and he was embarrassed when you found out but you called it cute
When extermination day hits he could see how tense you get and when you told him on what happened before he found you he couldn’t help but hate Adam more and so every Extermination day Lucifer would hold your hand and comfort you may even play a little music and it just grew more loving when you two started dating
You do help out with Lu Lu World as it’s one of Lucifer’s passion projects and no one could believe how upset you were when Mammon created Loo Loo land, you almost put your exterminator skills to use but Lucifer stopped you and let Mammon have his way cause he didn’t want to argue with Mammon so you just had to let it go
You both do play music together as when you were both angels all you did was play music, duets and you can’t tell me you, Lucifer, and Charlie didn’t sing together once
You remember seeing Lucifer’s wings for the first time and how amazed you were as you kept complementing him and that just made his face all red and what made you stop was when he commented o how your wings could have been more pretty then his, you just smile at him
Now here you two have more of a bodyguard/ secretary and famous person kind of relationship even though he may not need it he likes keeping you around and that just help made his feelings grow for you
#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel x reader#hazbin hotel headcanon#hazbin hotel imagines#hazbin hotel imagine#hazbin hotel lucifer#hazbin hotel episode 5#lucifer morningstar#hazbin hotel Lucifer Morningstar#hazbin hotel x female reader#hazbin hotel x fem reader#hazbin hotel Lucifer x reader#lucifer magne#lucifer x reader#exterminator reader#helluva boss#helluva boss x reader#hazbin hotel Lucifer Morningstar x reader#fallen exorcist au#female reader
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𝐀 𝐃𝐎𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐇𝐔𝐒𝐁𝐀𝐍𝐃
Pairing: Trueform!Sukuna x f!Reader
Summary: Your husband usually calls for you to join him during his bath.
Warnings: MDNI, mentions of Sukuna killing people, rough pregnancy, Sukuna being fluffy (so slightly ooc), reader is mean to Sukuna
Discord +18 - Twitter - Ko-Fi
Ever since you shared the news of your pregnancy with your husband, Sukuna has become more loving. The man who’d talk to you however he wanted, now makes sure to soften his voice when talking to you. He wants to see you every hour of the day, even when you don’t want to see him. Sukuna is seeing how you’re struggling with your pregnancy, and he wants to check up on you constantly.
You’re not too far along that you both know of, yet you’re huge. He grows worried that his selfish want of a child will cause you harm. There’s one person that Sukuna would die for, and it’s you. If something were to happen to you because of himself then he’d– He doesn’t want to think of it.
Lately he’s been asking to take baths with you. At the end of the day, a servant walks into your chambers and informs you, “Lord Sukuna requests for you to join him in his bath, mistress.”
She bows her head to not look at you, scared that she’ll end up like the last servant that dared to look you in the eye. It was Sukuna’s doing because how dare someone look his wife in the eye? You sigh before telling her, “I’ll be there in a second.”
She stands in the entrance of your room, given orders to not leave without you. Sure, Sukuna requests to see you but it’s an order from him. You don’t have much of an option.
You follow behind her, and she excuses herself when you’re finally with him. Sukuna lays comfortably in the water, patiently waiting for you to get undressed and join him in the water. He watches as you take off all your garments and walk over to him when you’re completely bare.
“You need to start leaving me alone, you’re starting to annoy me.” You tell him as you get in the water. Sukuna chuckles, finding it amusing how you’ve completely stopped fearing him. One of his hands caresses you from your breasts to your bump, resting there.
“Now, why are you getting mad at me? I thought you wanted a loving husband?” Sukuna comments, kissing the top of your head. Your hand rests on top of his, lightly squeezing it.
“I wanted one before he got me pregnant. I swear I must be carrying twins– Or the baby also has four arms. I don’t know, I’m just miserable.” You confess, and Sukuna kisses the top of your head again. He really shouldn’t have expected it to be any different. Sukuna’s huge, why would his baby be any different?
“It’s just one and done then?” He asks, and you hum in response. Maybe your answer will be different in a few years, but for now it’s that. He feels a tug on his heartstrings, seeing how much you’re struggling. He’s worried. “Are you holding up okay, though?”
“Not like we could do anything if I wasn’t.” You answer. He’s definitely much softer than your usual husband, and you would’ve loved it if you weren’t carrying a monster child. His hand remains on your stomach, and he feels as his baby kicks while you moan in pain. Sukuna shushes you, feeling as his baby moves.
“I’m trying to feel him! Shut up, woman!” He raises his voice, and you slightly turn to glare at him. A look that would surely kill you if you were anyone else.
“How does me making noise correlate with you feeling the baby! Think, Sukuna! Use your fucking brain.” You’re definitely bolder than usual, which makes him laugh.
“You’re so beautiful when you’re yelling at me.” He says, grabbing your hand and bringing it up to his lips so he can kiss it. “I love seeing you demanding and mean. It shows the effect I have on you.”
“Really?” You answer, and he hums in response. There’s no better time to bring up what’s been bugging you than now. “I hate that new servant you took in. Kick her out.”
“And why is that?” He asks.
“She was looking at you funny.” You respond.
“In the sense?”
“She has the hots for you, and I don’t like it.”
“Hmm… What if I was looking for–” He begins and you glare at him. He doesn’t have much of a sense of humor, but he guesses that’s something that’s off limits when he tries to joke. “Don’t you want me to do more?”
“Like what?” You question, even though you should know your husband better than anyone.
“Kill her.” He answers.
“Hmm… Up to you.” You reply. You lay comfortably on his chest, feeling as his finger traces lazy circles on your belly. You change the topic, “Why do you think it’s a boy?”
“I can’t see myself with a daughter.”
#ryomen sukuna#sukuna x reader#sukuna#sukuna ryomen#jujutsu kaisen sukuna#jjk sukuna#jujutsu sukuna#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#ryomen sukuna x reader#sukuna x you#sukuna x y/n#sukuna fluff
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saving me- s.reid
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a/n: fem reader, but as always imagine what you like :)
summary: spencer has to save you before it's too late.
pairing: spencer reid x fem bau! reader
warnings: general cm topics, sexual assault, hostage situation, drugging, the team don't know about you and spencer, injuries, reader gets injured, reader is allergic to opioids, drugs, alergic reaction, knives, guns, reader begs to be killed, spencer shoots someone. (i think that's it, tell me if i missed anything :))
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Another migraine. Another fucking migraine.
Your life was truly a joke.
You sat beside Emily in the car, eyes heavy with pain as you profusely rubbed them, the sunlight from the sky beside you far too bright.
“Y/l/n? Any ideas?” Morgan asked, kicking you softly under the table.
“The unsub will probably be extremely interested in the investigation but they probably won’t bring themselves into it. We’ll end up seeking them out,” you rattled off.
“Are you alright?” Prentiss whispered.
“Fine,” you lied. “Just tired eyes.”
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Spencer’s eyes were on you from the second you’d spoken about your ‘tired eyes’. He was meant to be working up a geological profile, but his focus was completely on you. ‘Tired eyes’, you’d been wearing glasses or contacts all week, you’d been drinking enough liquids, you’d been eating, he assumed you’d slept, you'd been busy most of the week and sleeping at your own apartment instead of his.
What could cause ‘tired eyes’?
“Reid!” Seaver all but shouted in his ear.
“Y-yeah? Yes?” He answered, eyes focusing on the map again.
“Is Y/l/n here?” Rossi asked.
“W-what? No. I thought she went with Hotch and Prentiss,” he hesitated.
“She told them she was with us,” Rossi sighed. “So then where is she?”
“I-I don’t know,” Spencer admitted. “I’ll call her.”
Rossi held up your cell phone and Spencer’s stomach dropped.
“Shit,” he cursed.
“Shit is right,” Rossi nodded.
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It had been 24 hours, you were officially a missing person. You had no idea where you were, someone must’ve drugged you. That hadn’t been a regular migraine. Your head thumped with pain as you struggled against the duct tape around your hands and feet.
“You’re one beautiful girl, aren’t you?” You could hear the smirk in his voice, feel the way he was watching you.
You tried to scream but the duct tape around your mouth made it difficult.
“I’m going to enjoy this,” he came closer, into the light. You could see his face. He was a white male, between the ages of 35-40, dad-build, and a sick smirk.
You didn’t fight back, you couldn’t. You didn’t even notice the camera in the corner. You didn’t know that this was being recorded, or live-streamed directly to Penelope. Penelope, who showed it to the team. To your boyfriend.
They were watching the worst moment of your life unfold.
And you had no idea.
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“Guys,” Penelope squeaked. “This j-just came through,” she showed them her laptop and looked away, tears clouding her vision.
“Is that-” Derek started
“Y/n,” Aaron finished for him.
“What about her? Did you find her?” Spencer asked, staring at the group from behind Penelope. “Is she ok?”
The team’s eyes were glued to the screen as Spencer stood there, demanding an answer.
“Guys what?!” he shouted. “Someone answer me!”
“Come here,” Seaver sighed. Spencer stood beside her and watched in horror as the unsub hurt you.
“We have to find her,” he stated. “Now.”
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“Please, please just kill me,” you begged. He’d taken the tape off a while ago. “Please kill me.”
“I’m not a necrophiliac,” he laughed in your face. “I like my girls alive.”
“Fuck you,” you sobbed. Blood, dirt, tears, and sweat coating your skin. “Fuck you!”
“I’m actively trying to fuck you,” he laughed again. You hated him. You hated this. You hated everything.
“Just kill me,” you sobbed. “Please!”
He hit you on the head and you went out again.
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“FBI!” Morgan’s voice rang out through the warehouse. Spencer was hot on his heels, walking ahead of him and ignoring proper protocol. “Reid!” He ran after him.
“FBI! Put the knife down!” Spencer shouted at the unsub holding a knife to your throat. Something had gone wrong. He scanned the room quickly.
“I-I didn’t mean to- I was just-” The unsub stepped away, dropping the knife. “She wasn’t meant to die.”
Die. Dead. You were dead.
Spencer fired his gun without a second thought. He ran over to you and checked your pulse, there but barely.
“Hotch I need an ambulance!” He shouted. “Y/n, baby, I need you to wake up,” he begged. “Please, please, wake up, I need you Y/n. Please.”
“Spencer-” Prentiss started but Spencer silenced her with his own words.
“We’re dating. We have been for a year and a half, don’t you dare tell me to ‘step away’,” he sighed.
The paramedics rushed in, starting you on an IV.
“She’s allergic to opioids,” Spencer rattled off. “She can’t have any opioids.”
“Spencer,” Hotch sighed. “She’s had some already,” Hotch pointed to the vials in the corner of the room and the rusty needle beside them.
Fuck.
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“So when were you planning on telling us?” Derek sighed as they all sat in the waiting room.
“I don’t know, soon-maybe?”
“A year and a half is a long time,” Emily smiled. “Congratulations.”
Spencer nodded.
“Dr. Reid?” The nurse asked. Spencer shot up and out of his seat.
“Yes?”
“Ms. Y/l/n is stable but she is severely hurt. Physically and... mentally. She endured hours of sexual assault and her body and mind reflect that. I suggest someone non-threatening to see her first. Maybe a woman?”
Spencer gulped and nodded. “Emily?”
“Yeah of course,” she nodded, walking behind the nurse as he led her to your room.
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You wanted Spencer. You needed him.
Emily walked in and tears filled your eyes. “Where’s Spencer? Is he ok?”
“He’s fine, they just thought that you’d want someone non-threatening to come in and see you first-” Emily explained.
“Can you go grab Spencer please?” you sniffled. She smiled and nodded, then left the room.
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“Spencer?” Emily called into the hall. “She wants you.”
Spencer had never walked faster in his life.
There you were. Bruises and scratches littering your body and face. Your beautiful face. Your beautiful smile and teary eyes.
“Come here, please,” you whispered. Spencer sat at your side, your hand in his. “Thank you.”
He chuckled sadly. “For what?”
“Saving me. All the time,” you smiled softly.
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criminal minds masterlist :)
navigation for my blog :) (criminal minds, marvel, top gun, challengers, the bear, the hunger games, obx+)
#criminal minds#criminal minds imagine#bau team#criminal minds fandom#criminal minds x reader#spencer reid#criminal minds fic#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid x fem!reader#spencer reid x reader#dr spencer reid#criminal minds fanfic#spencer reid angst#doctor spencer reid#spencer reid criminal minds#matthew gray gubler#mgg
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Drown in the Deep
Synopsis: Drown your sorrows away into the deep dark ocean where it can’t be found. Feel its cold embrace and let the water in. Maybe then, you’ll see him again when you no longer feel anything.
CONTENT WARNING: The reader very much intends to die/get themself killed, detailing how they’d love to drown in the abyss.
Notes: Sebastian Solace x GN!Reader / Spoilers for Sebastian’s backstory / Possibly OOC / Established relationship, can be interpreted as either married or not but they are living together / Angst (Hurt w/ eventual comfort) / Death + blood (not the reader despite the synopsis and content warning) / Not really a happy ending honestly
(This is VERY self-indulgent I love hate Sebastian. Also a bit of experimentation and playing around with his character. I’m not so good on romance stuff, so I hope what’s here is to your liking. Also rewrote some parts A LOT due to idea change/read up on lore and realized things didn’t add up here. I think I’ve got most of it covered though. Anyway I love how a few runs of playing Pressure for the first time, I died to A-60 HAHAAAAA kill me.)
Credits: Dividers by @cafekitsune
A chance to be freed from your criminal record, and a reward worth to last for a very, very long time. As they always say, “High risk, high reward,” and the risks were certainly high. You could very much die. It was a chance anyone crazy enough would take.
But you didn’t sign up for this for the reward. You didn’t care about it in the slightest. To you, this would be an easy way out. An escape from this dreadful life fate had decided for you. So here you are, sitting in a submarine with three others in silence. There’s no telling on how deep you’re going, they never bothered to tell you how exactly far it was nor the possible dangers you’ll be facing. You’ll welcome anything if it means you won’t wake up again.
Still, you wondered why things went the way it did. Everything was fine until your partner was framed for a murder he didn’t commit. Nine murders, to be exact. You were there for the trial. You saw and heard everything. You kept your cool throughout all of it. You were hoping, praying to whatever god is out there to show them he was innocent. None of it mattered in the end.
After the trial, you went straight home, not even bothering to listen to your family who was also there. By the time you entered your shared home and locked the door behind you, you stood in silence for a while. You didn’t know what you were feeling at that very moment. You felt hot tears beginning to swell up, and your vision beginning to blur. Your legs eventually give out and you fell to your knees. You muffled your sobs with your hand as you curled up on the floor.
You couldn’t get yourself to calm down for a while. You don’t even know how long you were laying there once you feel your tears dry up and the sound of your heart beating rapidly leaves your ears. You don’t know what to do.
He was imprisoned and sentenced for execution for the nine murders you know he didn’t cause, but that didn’t matter. You weren’t there when it supposedly happened. You couldn’t prove anything. You were powerless to do anything.
Many early mornings were spent struggling to even leave the house, let alone the bed itself if you even managed to drag yourself to bed. You were too exhausted to even try for most. When you did manage to begin your day, you quickly became aware that everything is so much more irritating. People talking to you, certain noises you hear, how your food tastes… You just wanted to go back home and waste away.
As for majority of your nights, they have been spent just curled up in bed and crying until you eventually exhausted yourself. Gripping anything that resembled or had traces left of him and holding it close, hoping just the mere fleeting scent of him lulls you to sleep. Feeling the cold and empty space beside you and being reminded he’s gone, as if the reminders from your family weren’t already enough.
You know your family has been trying to contact you, sometimes even coming to the house, but you’ve ignored them every time. You don’t want to see them. You don’t want to talk, to hear, or to even think about them. You just wanted to be left alone.
A few years had gone by since then but you didn’t feel any better than before. You weren’t sure if you felt worse. Maybe it was because you felt numb nowadays.
Before you knew it, you soon find yourself behind bars. What you did, you don’t know. If you really did it, you didn’t care. You don’t know how long your sentence is, but you don’t care. You don’t know if whatever you did caused any deaths, but you don’t care. You don’t care anymore. You just wanted to drown in your despair, and this… “job offer” seemed promising. Retrieve a crystal deep inside a facility hidden in the deepest parts of the ocean.
To be so deep underwater to where the sun does not shine, to drift endlessly as water fills your lungs and it becomes so unbearably cold. To where you can’t feel anything anymore, not your body nor your emotions. To just feel the cold water and see nothing but darkness as the water pulls your body to wherever it so desires. Perhaps your remains could become the next meal for whatever lurks in the ocean’s abyss. Your body would never be found. You’d be gone without a trace.
So you signed up, knowing they don’t expect you to return. You don’t either. You don’t plan on getting that crystal, and you don’t plan on returning alive.
The shotgun shell directed at your neck on the diving gear given to you seemed promising as well.
If there is an afterlife, maybe you can see him again there. That sounded nice. You just wish you weren’t sent down with three other people. You never thought it’d be so hard to die in a place where risks of death were incredibly high. Perhaps it was because they wanted to use each other to get the reward for themselves, so they kept each other alive as long as possible. Covering each other’s eyes when the shark was outside the window, turning off another’s flashlight when an odd black figure appeared in the dark, saving each other from the creature inside the lockers… They weren’t going to let such easy bait be killed so easily, not this early.
Still, you strayed close behind as they often checked if you were still there. You kept your head low, until you heard another pair of footsteps from behind you.
Strange… The other three are already in front of you… And they’re just looking through drawers for anything useful.
The footsteps are getting louder and faster. You turned around just in time to see a strangely humanoid, armless figure running at you. It yelped the moment you locked eyes on it, immediately turning tail and running away.
“What the hell was that?!” One of the other expendables exclaimed.
Both of you walked back into the previous room to see where it possibly came from. There was a hole in the wall, shaped exactly like the creature they just saw.
“So they’re really in the walls, huh…” they then lightly punch your shoulder, “Hey, good job. I didn’t even hear it until it made that weird sound before it ran off,”
You say nothing.
“Come on, let’s keep going,”
You looked at them as they rejoined the others then back at the hole. You wished you didn’t turn around.
After a few more doors, the lights suddenly flickered. The one closest to you grabbed you and had you hide in a locker. Maybe they picked up on what you’ve been trying to do. You did willingly look into the eyes of the shark just outside the window, and they had to cover your eyes and drag you along with them. You also opened a locker that was already occupied by a strange creature coated in black and, what you assumed were, purple eyes. You hoped they’d leave you behind to be devoured by it, but you were pulled out and was patched up as best as they could do it. The damage wasn’t too severe, but still. There just had to be a spare medical kit in the room.
Maybe you weren’t being so discreet about it.
There were only three lockers in the room you were currently in and none in the room prior. They pressed on to the next door ahead. You were about to open your locker to step out into the path of the oncoming creature, but it zipped by you in an instant. It was much faster than what you’ve been dealing with.
You hear the others leave their locker followed with a quick flash of the flash beacon. You slowly step out of your locker and follow them into the next room to meet up with the other person. The one in front of you pulled out their flashlight, but ended up tripping over something. You stopped walking as they shine their light over what made them trip.
It was the one who ran ahead to find a spare locker. There was no blood or any signs of injury, but they weren’t moving and their eyes were still wide open. The other two tried to get them to respond, even shaking them, but they remained unresponsive. It was almost like they were just left an empty shell.
You restrain yourself from speaking as you would’ve called them an idiot for giving up a hiding spot in favor to make sure their bait stayed alive for a little longer, only to get killed in the process. Only 27 doors have been opened. Surely not all of you can survive much longer.
By the 35th door, one of them had used a code breacher to open a door without the keycard. Once the door slid open, a large creature with a smiling grey mask was seen on the other side of the door. Before they could react, it lunged towards them and instantly killed them on the spot before retracting their hand as it gets caught in the door while it was sliding shut. The blood splattered all over the floor and even reached you and the other expendable beside you.
By the 47th door, the lights flickered as you searched through a room off to the side. You can hear what you can describe as a distorted chorus faintly echoing down the hall, and soon a loud scream followed with multiple banging against a locker. The noise stopped as you walked to the door leading back to the path you’re supposed to take and you only see the aftermath. A fresh pool of blood and a destroyed locker. There was no body. The creature responsible is no where to be found.
You were alone now. Finally.
You kept your head low as you continued on, not bothering to search through the drawers for anything. Your body is starting to ache at this point. You opened the 50th door leading into a dimly lit corridor.
“Need to stock up?”
You looked up as you see the vent’s cover fall over. You turned around, then back towards the vent. You can see the next door ahead that requires a keycard, but you can’t find it from out here. You didn’t have a code breacher either as the others you were previously with had used them up.
“Come on, I won’t bite,” the strangely familiar voice beckons.
Had he not spoken twice, you would’ve thought you were hallucinating. Or maybe you are right now. A sort of “false hope,” so to speak. Not to mention how you can just barely recognize the voice. You’re having a hard time processing it after everything.
With no where else to turn, you walk to the vent and slowly crawl through. The room was dark, but lit up as you made it to the other side. You managed to get a good look at him, not exactly expecting some sort of fish-human hybrid.
“Ah, there you-” you see how his smile quickly disappears and his eyes widened once he sees you.
You only stare at him, tilting your head slightly to the side. He looked like he had just seen a ghost which wouldn’t be so far off considering what you had to witness for the past 49 doors, but why was he looking at you like that? He cautiously lowered himself down, close enough to your height but still far enough for some space.
You instinctively, though slightly, moved away as his hand moved closer to your face. That was until he finally spoke.
“[Name]..?”
You stepped back upon hearing your name leave his mouth. You narrow your eyes at him, “How do you…?”
Then it finally registered in your head. You’re not just hearing things, that voice was his.
Your eyes widened, now feeling his cold hand against your cheek, “S-Sebastian?“
“Yes…! Yes!” He nods, smiling widely, “It’s me!”
You couldn’t hold back your tears at all. The moment he confirmed it was really him was what finally broke down your walls. The last time you had cried this much was when he was to be executed. You had to hold onto his hand to keep yourself standing. He seemed to sense that as his third limb pulled you closer to him and held you in a tight embrace. You buried your face into his shoulder and sobbed until his grip on you got a bit too tight.
“W-Wait, Sebastian-!” You cried, “Let go!”
He gasps, immediately pulling away. You winced as you gently rubbed your arm. You looked up at Sebastian again and smiled.
“You have no idea how happy I am to see you’re still alive. I have so many questions. Can I-?”
Sebastian stops you there, “Hang on. Before I get to answering your questions, I have one tiny question for you,” he suddenly towers over you as he yells, “How the hell did you get here?! And why the hell did you sign up for this?! Didn’t they tell you the risks? That you could very much die?”
You jumped at his sudden change in tone and almost fell back. His tail had went to cover the opening of the vent in case you ultimately decided to make a run for it. What do you even tell him? That you signed up just to die? No other reason. How could you tell him that?
“I-I… Well, yes, they did. I just- It’s because…” you don’t know what to say.
“Tell me the truth,” he demands. You swear you heard a hiss in his voice, “Of all people, why did you have to end up here?”
“I signed up for this because…” you paused, “Specifically because I wanted to die. I knew what I was getting myself into, Sebastian. They didn’t tell me anything specific,”
“Of course those idiots didn’t…” He scoffed, “They don’t expect you or the others to return,”
“I never planned to. I couldn’t care less about this so called crystal they told me I was supposed to retrieve,” you looked away, “Honestly, I don’t even remember what I did to end up here… Maybe I did something that killed a few people, or maybe I was framed like you,”
Sebastian calmed down a little and had moved back as you spoke. He repositions himself so that his back was against the wall and his tail would nudge you towards him.
“You said you signed up with the intention to die here,” he then says, “Why?”
You sit beside him as his tail slightly curls around you, “You were sent for execution and confirmed to be dead. I just couldn’t live with the fact that I couldn’t see you,”
His looks at your bloodied clothes and noticed bandages through some of the holes in your uniform. He points to it, “Are those..?”
“It’s from this weird black tentacle creature in a locker. It’s nothing too serious, if that’s what you’re wondering,”
He muttered a name you didn’t quite catch and he quickly moves on, “And the blood?”
You shake your head, “It’s not mine,”
He lets out a sigh of relief at that. It was finally your turn to ask questions.
“Sebastian, how did you survive?”
“Was picked up by Urbanshade before I was supposed executed. Guess they decided it’d be better if I was officially declared dead,”
“And you became this during that time?”
“You could say that. It’s, uh… It’s a long story,”
He doesn’t want to discuss it and you knew that was the case. So, you didn’t question it further. You have a good feeling you may have an idea now that you noticed a document on the table. Whatever was in there might have the answers to most of your questions, but you’re not sure if you even want to read it if he lets you. The mere thought of what could be mentioned in there makes you sick.
There’s still one other that you desperately want an answer for.
“We’re… not leaving this place, are we?” You questioned, not looking at him, “At least, I’m probably not thanks to this diving gear… One shotgun shell pointed directly at my neck, and if I even try to take it off, tamper with it, or leave this place,”
You stopped there. Both of you knew. Sebastian didn’t say anything for a moment, “I can get both of us out of here. I just need more time,”
More time. How much more time before your body can no longer keep going? You want to believe him, you really do, but you really might actually die here.
How ironic. You came here because you wanted to die. You watched the others die before your very eyes without much of a reaction. All of a sudden, you feel your stomach drop.
You’re afraid to die.
#�� // the moon provides#sebastian solace x reader#roblox pressure sebastian#pressure sebastian#sebastian solace#sebastian x reader#roblox pressure#x reader#roblox sebastian solace
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Sunshine [7] - Heat Wave
AN: My loves, thank you so so much for your wonderful support and lovely comments and HCs! ❤️ You’re amazing! ❤️
I hope you like this as well, and please don’t forget to tell me what you think, thank you! 🥰
Pairing: Logan Howlett x Female!Reader
Summary: There are many ways how a first date can end.
Word Count: 4400
CW: Explicit language, mentions of sex, drinking, adult themes MDNI
Series Masterlist
A rational and emotionally mature person would know that drunk calls were normal, and the aftermath was inevitable. Drinking too much sometimes led to that, everyone knew, and a rational and emotionally mature person was supposed to just handle it with dignity.
Too bad you weren’t that person.
“So you’re avoiding the hot lumberjack?”
“Can we stop calling him that?”
You repressed a laugh and filled Nik’s cup with coffee.
“Well, I wouldn’t say I’m avoiding him,” you said. “It’s just…you know, I’m sure Logan is a very busy individual so if anything, I’m doing him a favor by not distracting him. For all we know, he could be on a mission right now. Do you really want him to die because he’s answering my call? I couldn’t live with that on my conscience.”
“Sunshine—”
“He could be saving the world,” you pointed out. “Do you want the world to end because he is answering my call? Do you want me to be the person who causes the extinction of the whole humankind? I mean honestly what am I, a tech CEO?”
“You’re so avoiding him.”
You heaved a sigh, then leaned against the counter.
“I texted him the next morning.”
“But you didn’t call him?”
“I can’t call him,” you whined. “I’ve made a fool of myself.”
“I’m sure that’s not true,” Nik said and you tilted your head at Jamie who was eating his breakfast.
“How are you being so quiet about this? I thought you’d be thrilled that I’m avoiding him.”
“I am but I can’t comment on this whole thing, I have a conflict of interest.”
“Conflict of interest?”
“Yeah I hate the guy’s guts,” he stated before nodding at you. “Keep avoiding him, you’re better off without him.”
Nik gasped. “Jamie!”
“Babe, that guy is a walking red flag.”
“Even if it were true, he also looks like he belongs on the cover page of those vintage romance books my grandma has in her library.”
“Fabio?!”
“I don’t know his name Jamie, but in Logan’s case I’ll allow a little red.” Nik stated. “It’s been years since she got laid.”
Your jaw dropped. “No it hasn’t!”
“I’m half scared she’ll join a convent,” Nik said, motioning in your direction and making you roll your eyes.
“Guys.”
“She’s not just going to get laid, she’s already talking about moving to the mountains with that asshole.”
“It’s not a mountain, it’s a cabin in the woods!” you argued and Jamie shrugged his shoulders.
“Whatever it is.”
“I’m pretty sure he doesn’t want to hear from me after that night,” you said. “I mean I totally made a move on him and…”
“And he turned you down because you were drunk!” Nik said with a smile and Jamie made a face.
“That’s like the bare minimum, don’t get impressed by that.”
“And when he maimed three guys for her?”
“The least he could do, considering what they threatened her with. Should’ve killed them if you ask me.”
A shiver ran down your spine but you made yourself busy with the tablecloth, wiping at the counter while Nik raised his brows.
“Driving her home so that she wouldn’t walk in the rain? Fixing her car? Going all the way from school to her neighborhood because he was worried about her being drunk and outside?”
“What are we, keeping a list now?”
“Darling I know you’re very adamant about hating this guy but you do have to admit the things he’s been doing for her are the opposite of a red flag,” Nik said, patting his hand as if trying to console him and Jamie heaved a sigh.
“I hate this.”
“So you think I should call him?” you asked Nik and he nodded.
“You should.”
“I disagree.”
“Well aware of that Jamie.”
“I hate him.”
“Figured that one as well, strange as it sounds,” Nik said before turning to you. “Call him.”
You nibbled on your lip, then motioned at Stacey and held up your phone, making her nod before you made your way out of the diner. Taking a deep breath, you found his name on the screen and touched it before taking the phone to your ear.
It rang only once.
“Hey princess.”
“Logan, hi!” you said, your heart pacing in your chest. “Um, are you busy?”
“Not at all,” he said. “Took you a while to sober up huh?”
You could feel your lips curling into a smile at his teasing remark.
“I may or may not have been avoiding you,” you admitted, biting at your nails. “I’m sorry.”
“Not a problem,” he said with a small chuckle. “Why were you avoiding me?”
You shrugged your shoulders as if he could see you.
“I don’t know,” you mumbled. “Reasons.”
He hummed and you shifted your weight before you leaned back to the wall of the diner.
“Thank you by the way,” you said. “For…that whole night. And I’m sorry for—for making a move on you, that’s very unlike me and I—”
“Are you free tonight?”
Your head shot up, your eyes widening at his question and you felt your breath catching in your throat before you swallowed.
“Me?” you felt the need to ask and he paused for a moment as if he didn’t know how to answer that.
“…Yes?”
“As in tonight tonight?”
“Yeah.”
“Uh—sure!” you said, your voice going high pitched for a moment. “I’d love that!”
“Great, I can pick you up from the diner—”
“No!” you cut him off as you looked down at your uniform, frowning slightly. “I need to drop by my place first.”
“That’s fine,” he said. “I can pick you up from there then. Does 8 work for you?”
“Yeah!” you said breathlessly as you nodded your head so fast that you got dizzy for a second, blinking fast. “It totally works for me.”
“Great,” he said. “See you tonight then.”
“See you,” you said and hung up, then let out a squeal and pressed the phone to your chest, jumping up and down in your spot. You took a deep breath, then fixed your hair and made your way back into the diner to rush to the counter again.
“He asked me out!” you whispered to Nik, grabbing his arm. “Just now, he asked me out!”
Jamie let out a whine and buried his face into his palms while Nik grinned at you, patting Jamie on the back in a reassuring manner.
“See? Told you.”
“We’re meeting tonight! At 8!” you said and paused for a moment. “Oh my God what do I wear?”
“A Regency gown.”
“Jamie I love you but not now,” Nik told him before he turned to you. “We’ll videocall okay? You, me and Julie.”
“Okay.”
“And after you and Logan become a couple, we can have a double date.”
That was enough to make Jamie lift his head from his hands. “Absolutely fucking not.”
“Don’t worry, I’ll convince him,” Nik told you and you let out a giggle, your insides all warm with excitement.
“Nik,” you said. “I really really like him.”
Nik let out an “aw!” and reached out to squeeze your hand.
“That’s good!” he said. “I mean granted we will grill him about his intentions with you but it’s a great start.”
Jamie opened his mouth to disagree but Nik elbowed him, shooting him a glare. You suppressed your laugh as Jamie heaved a sigh, then turned to you.
“Just…” he said. “Be careful. Please?”
“Always am,” you promised him with a grin. “The pie is on me by the way. For emotional support.”
*
It wasn’t that you hadn’t been on dates.
Nik was quite the matchmaker, so was Julie. In fact, for the last year, they had been acting like their sole purpose in life was to find you a boyfriend so if anything, you had been on too many dates.
Not that—
Not that you assumed this was a date.
Even if you were wearing matching lingerie underneath your dress.
You were basically buzzing with anticipation as you stared at your reflection in the mirror, fixing your hair before smoothing down your dress. Your wardrobe looked like it had exploded and for a moment the possibility of bringing Logan back to your apartment crossed your mind, making your heart skip a happy beat. You gathered up all your clothes into your arms to push them into the wardrobe, then put your hands on your hips, tilting your head to the side.
“Good enough,” you mumbled and walked to your vanity to check on your makeup, then went to the living room to approach the small fish tank. You grabbed the fish food next to it, then sprinkled it into the tank carefully before dragging your finger over the glass, following their movements.
Theo was going to be so happy when he saw them.
Your head whipped around when you heard the doorbell ring, your heart beating in your ears and to make it worse you knew very well that he could hear it but you refused to dwell on it, so you made your way to the door to open it.
Fuck, you were beginning to think you were never going to get used to just how hot he was.
“Hi!”
“Hi princess,” he said, his deep voice making your stomach do a happy flip as he looked you up and down. “You look beautiful.”
Oh dear God, you were not going to survive tonight.
“Thanks, so do you,” you said with a smile before you turned around to get your jacket and purse. “So um, where are we going?”
Where you were going turned out to be a cozy bar with soft music playing in the background. It was somehow so Logan, there was no chaos, no deafening noise or blinding lights.
Just pure comfort; the kind that made you almost lightheaded, warming your insides.
“So why exactly were you avoiding me?” Logan asked as the waiter put his whiskey and your cocktail on the table and you took a shaky breath, forcing yourself to focus on the question rather than how handsome he looked under the dim light of the bar as you crossed your arms on the table.
“I mean…” you trailed off, scrunching up your face for a moment. “I was embarrassed.”
“Why?”
“Uh I don’t know if you remember that night,” you tried to joke your way through discomfort. “But it wasn’t what one would call dignified.”
He shot you a lighthearted glare and you shrugged your shoulders.
“I turn into a very impulsive person when I’m drunk,” you admitted and his lips quirked into a smile.
“Yeah I don’t know that many people who buy fish when they’re drunk.”
“Oh you don’t know the half of it,” you said with a laugh. “I have a worse drunk story actually.”
“Yeah?”
“Oh yeah, on my senior year in high school, me and my friends got drunk and in our town there was this guy who was a dog breeder,” you said. “And we knew he was terrible to them, we wrote petitions and everything for the town council to do something but there was no use. So one night, we knew he was out of town so we broke into his house and stole all the dogs.”
He raised his brows, smiling slightly. “Seriously?”
“Yeah! And we kept all of them at my friend’s house and one by one we got them adopted. The guy knew we did it, but there was no chip or anything so he couldn’t do anything.”
“Wow,” he said, a chuckle vibrating in his chest. “So you turn into a vigilante when you’re drunk, got it.”
“I do,” you said, raising your cocktail in a mock of toast before taking a sip while he leaned back. “I love animals. I was actually studying to be a—” you paused for a moment. “Well, studying is a big word for it considering I dropped out without even completing my freshman year, but I was studying to be a vet before Theo.”
He tilted his head. “Really?”
“Mm hm.”
“Classmate?” he asked and you licked your lips, an icy spark replacing the happy warmth inside of you.
“Uh,” you said, trying to sound nonchalant. “T.A actually.”
Logan pulled his brows together and you took a sip of your cocktail.
“Trust me, I know how fucked up it sounds now,” you said with a small laugh. “But back then I didn’t and it worked out very well for him.”
“That guy really sounds like he needs to get his ass beat.”
“Oh Jamie actually beat him up once,” you pointed out. “In what became known as The Legendary Bar Fight. We celebrate it once a year with drinks.”
“You could give me his address.”
“Absolutely not, and I don’t even know where he is to be honest,” you said. “Anyway, why are we talking about him? Also why am I the one doing all the talking yet again?”
“I like listening to you talk.”
You could feel your cheeks growing warmer and a smile curled your lips.
“Until I give you a headache.”
“Never gonna happen.”
Your smile widened as you looked down at your cocktail, shifting your weight.
“Well, either way,” you mumbled. “It’s your turn now.”
“Oh, my turn?”
“I barely know anything about you,” you admitted. “Other than the fact that you have been saving me a lot since we met.”
He shrugged his shoulders. “What do you want to know?”
“Whatever you’re willing to tell me,” you said. “What did you want to be when you grew up?”
“Alive.”
Your brows pinched together as you took a deep breath.
“Limited options, got it,” you said. “Were your family also mutants?”
“My brother,” he said. “Victor. We don’t…talk anymore.”
Something in his tone was distant, so you decided not to push it.
“Do you like working for Professor X?” you asked, steering the conversation to safer waters and that seemed to pull him out of his thoughts as he nodded his head.
“Yeah,” he said. “Charles is the best man I’ve ever met. Don’t tell him I said that though.”
“Cross my heart,” you said with a giggle, proud of yourself for finding a better subject. “How did you meet him?”
“He found me back when I was a cage fighter.”
You blinked a couple of times. “Sorry, a cage fighter?”
“Yeah I was uh…” he paused for a moment. “Wandering.”
“How does one become a cage fighter?”
“Wrong crowd,” he joked, making you let out a laugh.
“I’d bet. And now you are part time teacher, part time…going on missions.”
“Mm hm.”
“And you have a costume,” you mused as he shook his head slightly. “Any chance I’ll get to see you in it?”
“If you ask nicely.”
A fire spread over your cheeks at the teasing tone in his voice and you scrunched up your nose at him.
“I’m always nice,” you pointed out nonchalantly. “Or has it escaped your attention?”
“Trust me, it hasn’t.”
His lips twitched when a smile warmed your face and that soft light started gleaming in his eyes.
“Okay,” you said, sitting up straight. “Another question.”
“Shoot.”
“You really didn’t get a handkerchief?”
He scoffed a laugh. “You remember that?”
“Unfortunately.”
“As I said, I had other priorities in mind.”
You narrowed your eyes a little. “I could see you in period clothing, now that I imagine it...”
“Please stop imagining me like that.”
“Like those long jackets, long boots—oh my God,” you gasped, making him raise his brows. “Logan!”
“I’m not gonna like what you’re about to say, am I?”
“A top hat!”
Logan nodded to himself. “Yep, called it.”
“No seriously,” you insisted. “On Halloween—”
“Absolutely not.”
You let out a small laugh.
“Nik throws these amazing Halloween parties and the theme was ‘write your own story’ a couple years back,” you said. “So I got this huge dress, like…17th century huge, with a corset and everything, and no one really thinks about it but it is quite hard to unlace a corset—" you tilted your head when you saw his smirk. ”Hey!”
Logan held up his hands, gesturing surrender.
“I didn’t say anything.”
“Let me guess, you’re painfully familiar with how to unlace a corset?”
“Still not saying anything.”
You hummed, trying to adapt a serious expression.
“Anyway, Casanova,” you said. “So my story was, there’s this girl, who was betrothed to the love of his life, and then he gets lost at the sea and everyone is convinced that his ship sank, but the plot twist, he wasn’t dead so he comes back but he’s a vampire, and he turns her into a vampire as well –obviously with consent— and they live happily ever after.”
“Quite the love story.”
“Thank you,” you said happily. “So no handkerchief?”
“No handkerchief.”
You hummed, then heaved a sigh.
“Very well then,” you said and grabbed your purse to take out a pen, then pulled the napkin on the table to yourself to write your initials on it. You pulled back to look at it better, then held it out for him.
“There you go, Mr. I had other priorities.” you said with a grin. “A make do handkerchief.”
The fond look on his face was enough to make your heart skip a happy beat as he stared at you, then took it from you and folded it before he pulled out his wallet, making your eyes widen.
“Oh I was just—you don’t have to actually keep it, it’s a silly joke,” you stammered and he shot you a glance of disbelief as if he was surprised that you thought he wouldn’t.
“I’ll keep it,” he said while placing it into his wallet in such a careful manner that one simple observer would think it was something incredibly precious for him rather than just a bar napkin. You blinked a couple of times, gawking at him.
“Really?”
“Really.”
You were painfully aware of the heart eyes you were giving him so you forced yourself to drag your gaze from him to your cocktail and took a huge sip, your heart still beating in your ears.
“Okay then,” you said, taking a deep breath. “I hope you’re ready for more questions, because I have like a million of them.”
*
You had insisted walking after leaving the bar. It wasn’t that far away from your apartment, the weather was so nice, and you had hoped it would make him see you were completely sober, just in case it had escaped his attention how you had only drunk one cocktail in like two hours.
You had plans for tonight and it included him and your bed, God damn it.
“So you actually were a lumberjack?”
“I was cutting down trees and turning them into logs.”
“That’s what a lumberjack does,” you insisted as you walked beside him. “Julie has superpowers, I swear…”
“Hm?”
“Nothing,” you said quickly. “And you had a real cabin in the woods?”
“Something like that.”
“Are they still hiring?” you asked him, making him let out a laugh. “Seriously, I want a cabin in the woods.”
“For your Hi-Horse?”
Your heart skipped a beat as you stared up at him. “You remember that?”
“Of course,” he said as if he wasn’t melting your heart with that simple fact and you licked your lips.
“Did you have a horse?”
“Nope.”
“You had a cabin in the woods and you didn’t have a horse and two dogs and a cat?” you asked, pretending to be scandalized. “That’s just being short sighted, Logan.”
“Not all of us want to have a zoo, sweetheart.”
“It’s not a zoo!” you said with a gasp, making him grin.
“A farm then.”
“It’s not a farm,” you argued. “Farms have sheep.”
“Oh you don’t want sheep?”
“Of course I do but that’s beside the point,” you said. “It’s not a farm—”
“What are the sheep’s names?”
“Shearlock and Wooly Wonka,” you muttered, coaxing a chuckle out of him.
“Very creative.”
“Thank you,” you said. “I think it’s against the law to not have animals if you have a cabin in the woods.”
“It’s not.”
“Well it should be,” you said without hesitation and he bit back a smile as you stopped in front of your house.
Anticipation was swirling in your stomach, filling you with excitement and making your heartbeat faster. You knew he could hear it but for the first time, you didn’t mind it.
Desire was too strong to let you feel anything else.
“Um, so before I say what I’m about to say,” you said after a beat, turning to look at him better as you leaned back on the wall of the building. “I would like to point out that I’m completely one hundred percent sober.”
He tilted his head to the left, a mischievous light playing in his hazel eyes.
“Like, in case it has escaped your notice I only had one drink and it was a cocktail and it was a pretty light cocktail so like, half juice really,” you said. “And I’m not even buzzed, and even if I were buzzed, we walked here so fresh air would’ve helped. Which, it has no reason to help because to repeat I’m not even buzzed. I will blow on anything—that sounded wrong,” you corrected yourself, pulling your brows together. “Um, a breathalyzer I mean, if I blew into a breathalyzer it would come out a zero because I’m so sober, and—and—I don’t know if you paid attention to it, but I walked all the way here in a straight line, which should be the proof and if you didn’t, I can walk in a straight line right now to—”
You didn’t get to finish your sentence when he pulled you into a kiss.
You could swear the rest of the world stopped existing the moment his lips touched yours. His arm sneaked around your waist while he cradled the back of your head with his other hand, making your breath catch in your throat. Desire turned into fire in your veins, reaching your chest before it sent the warmth all over your body, making you dizzy. You gripped his shirt tighter in your fists, standing on your tiptoes, a soft whine escaping from your lips as soon as he pulled back, resting his forehead against yours.
“Fuck…” he whispered and you blinked up at him, nearly drunk in the haze.
“No I—I wanted you to do it,” you tried to find the right words through the fog of desire and he licked his lips, looking down at you before he shook his head slightly.
“You shouldn’t,” he rasped out and you pulled your brows together.
“I shouldn’t want you to do it?” you asked him, still trying to catch your breath and he nodded.
“I’m not…” he trailed off against your lips. “I’m no good for you.”
Your frown deepened before you let out a breath, and slowly reached out to cup his cheek. His eyes closed for a moment as if your mere touch was anchoring him to the moment, pulling him out of his own mind before he opened his eyes again to look at you. A tentative smile curled your lips and you thought for a moment before clearing your throat.
“Here’s what’s gonna happen,” you said, your voice soft. “I’ll be the one to decide whether you’re good for me or not. Alright?”
His eyes searched yours before he let out a breath, then nodded his head.
“Alright,” he said, his voice a murmur before he dipped his head down to kiss you again. A squeal escaped from you as he picked you up, making you wrap your legs around his waist and walked into the building. You had no idea how he didn’t lose his balance or hit anywhere on his way but you couldn’t bring yourself to care when he was kissing you like this, and you only noticed you had in fact reached your door when he pressed you against it.
“Inside, inside!” you giggled as you fished your keys out of your purse, and he held you with one arm, making your eyes widen while he took the keys from you and opened the door, then walked in and kicked the door shut behind him.
Oh God.
Oh God this was happening.
Now you understood what all those romance novels were talking about. You couldn’t pull yourself away from his kiss even if you wanted to, the fire had taken over your whole body until every single thought disappeared; the only thing that existed was him, and how good his lips made you feel. You wrapped your arms around his neck as you both fell on your bed, his weight taking your breath away for a moment before you unbuttoned his flannel and pushed it down his arms. He tossed it somewhere in the room and got rid of his white shirt underneath, making you let out a breath at his muscular body.
Jesus Christ.
Your fingertips grazed over his broad shoulders before slipping down to his hard chest and he helped you up to unzip your dress, his lips finding yours as if he couldn’t stand not kissing you even for a moment. He pulled back only to pull the dress off of you, but he froze as soon as his eyes fell on you.
“Fuck, you’re perfect,” the whisper left his lips like a prayer and you felt your heart skip a beat despite the ever-consuming fire.
“Not really,” you teased him. “I just planned it.”
He raised a brow, a mischievous glint appearing in his eyes and he slid down to the foot of the bed, then grabbed your ankle to pull you down, making you let out a small scream before you giggled, propping yourself up on your elbows to see him better.
“What are you doing?”
He gave you a wolfish grin, sending a pleasant shiver down your spine as he knelt down at the foot of the bed, his fingers drawing lazy circles on your inner thighs.
“Well, princess,” he muttered, your heart leaping up to your throat when you realized what he was about to do. “You’re not the only one who planned things.”
8 - Scorching
#logan howlett#logan howlett x reader#deadpool#deadpool and wolverine#deadpool 3#wolverine#wolverine x reader#logan wolverine#logan x reader#logan howlett x you#wolverine x you#james howlett#logan howlett imagine#logan x you#james logan howlett#logan xmen#wolverine logan
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#…..what is the point#every time I think I’m taking a step forward into healing#i fuck up.#i seriously hate myself more than anything#i try and I try and I try and I try but I can never change#it’s taking all my strength to not kill myself right in the bathroom rn#i just wanna grab one of her nice CLEAN kitchen knives and end it all#i keep going to say angry mean stuff then deleting it#cus I honestly just truly hate myself everything is my fucking fault#God I wanna feel the satisfaction of finally stabbing myself over and over and over#until I’ve finally fixed everything.#they say they’d fall apart without me it’s not true#I’m the cause of everything wrong and no matter how hard I try nothing works#i wanna plummet the knife into my chest and feel my heart stop beating#‘nothing’s happening to you’ if any of my fucking family stepped into my brain for one day they wouldn’t make it#I’m tired of being the only one who cares
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Not Good Enough
Author’s Note: My second job started up again, I take care of my nephew in the mornings and after school, and I've been sick!! I have about 7 WIPs right now that I know need a lot more time before they will be finished. I hope you all enjoy this story!!
Summary: You know you're ready to go on your first mission but what does Az think?
Pairing: Azriel x Reader
Warnings: a few cuss words, let me know if I need to add any :)
---
“You can’t be serious.” You shouted at the male in front of you.
“I’m the most serious I’ve ever been. And this argument is over.” He calmly stated in response.
You scoffed and looked over to Cass for help but he refused to make eye contact. Looking back at Azriel, you decided you wouldn’t give up that easy.
“You don’t get to decide when the argument is over. I’m coming with on this mission, I can help you.” You argued.
“Yes, I do get to decide that. No, you’re not coming. And no, you can’t help us. End. Of. Discussion.” He was starting to get frustrated with you.
His words only made you more mad, your temper getting the best of you.
“You’re ridiculous! You have been training me for months.. MONTHS! And you haven’t let me go on a single mission or actually see any action. This trip will be too dangerous for just the two of you. You need me to help you so why can’t you just let me come with.” You exclaimed.
“Because you’re not good enough!” Az shouted right back.
Ouch. That one hurt. Before you could compose yourself he continued.
“If you’re not fast enough, strong enough, smart enough when you’re on missions like these, you die. I was put in charge of you to train you and it is up to me to decide when you are good enough. I am telling you that you aren’t. I don’t want to hear about any of this again!” He finished his rant, his chest was heaving.
You tried to hide it but the look of hurt was clear on your face. When you glanced over at Cassian he was looking at you this time, like you were a puppy who had just been kicked. You hated it, you didn’t want sympathy.
Az noticed how much he hurt you and reached out his hand to you.
“Y/N-” He started but you backed away from his reach.
You turned around and walked away before he could try and speak to you again. Eventually Cass and Az continued to prepare for their mission and you went to your room before you could be embarrassed any further.
You couldn’t believe him, he trained you for months and always told you how well you were doing. He would tell you how you impressed him with your intelligence but now you’re not good enough? You knew you were good enough. During the meeting with the IC, when Az first announced you wouldn’t be joining him and Cass, both Feyre and Rhys looked surprised as well.
Before you could talk yourself out of it, you started to pack. You gathered your weapons and your bag and slid on your gear. When Cass and Az left, you waited a bit and then quietly followed their trail. It didn't matter that Az thought so lowly of you, you were going to prove him wrong.
You knew you had to stay a little farther back so they wouldn’t notice you, so you tracked them instead. Using all of the training you’ve had, you successfully followed them and stayed hidden the whole time.
The mission was supposed to be simple. Find the creature that had been causing problems and kill it. It should be easy enough for Cass and Az so you really couldn’t understand why he refused to bring you with.
You watched as Az and Cass followed the monster into the woods, trying to catch it off guard so it would be an easy kill. You stayed hidden in the shadows behind them and to the right when you heard some shuffling. Peering to where the noise was, you saw a second creature sneaking behind the 2 Illyrians.
Before you could even blink, the first creature turned around and swung at the two. The monster behind them pounced and landed on Cassian. He managed to fight it off and was dealing with that one when you saw Az backed into a tree. The vile beast swung at him again, and sent Az flying to the ground.
You took off running straight to Az, knowing you had to save him. Right before the creature could land the killing blow, you jumped on it's back. With fairly large daggers in both hands you brought your arms down, impaling it in the head with the two blades. It died quickly and fell with you still on top of it.
Cass had already killed the other one and came over to help you roll the creature off of Az. You held your hand out to him to help him up. After just saving his life, surely he sees how well you can do your job.
“What are you doing here?!” He yelled at you, rage in his eyes.
You were stunned, you saved his life and this is how he treats you? No, maybe he was in shock still?
“I assessed the situation first, Cass was holding his own and I saw you about to be killed so I acted fast. And I effectively and efficiently eliminated the threat. I did everything right-” You explained but he cut you off.
“No, what you did was disobey my direct orders to stay home. You could have been killed! You aren’t ready to handle this yet and you just proved it by not listening to me!” He continued to yell at you.
“How about you try saying ‘thank you’, you know, for literally saving your life one minute ago.” You sneered.
It was silent while the two of you glared at each other, smoke practically shooting out of your ears before Cass stepped in.
“Listen she did just save our asses and she’s already here now. We were going to set up camp and head home tomorrow anyways so she can just stay with us.” He told Az and then looked at you, “Come on, the cabin is about 30 minutes from here. Let’s go.”
He held out his arms, insinuating you needed to let him carry you so he could fly you to the cabin. The flight went by fast and you were still pissed at the spymaster when you landed.
The three of you entered the space silently and it wasn’t until Cass said something that you realized what the problem was.
“There’s only two beds.” He stated.
“Yes, because there was only supposed to be two of us on this mission.” Az grumbled and sent a look your way.
You rolled your eyes at him and looked at Cass instead.
“It’s a long trip home tomorrow so none of us should sleep on the floor. We don’t want to have a bad back all day long, believe me I’ve been there before. So who wants to share a bed?” Cass asked with a grin.
“Let’s just get three sticks. We can pull them and whoever pulls the longest gets the bed to themselves?” You suggested.
“Pretty and smart.” Cassian replied with a wink at you.
Az let out a growl at his words and Cass held his hands up. Unbelievable, he couldn’t even let anyone else compliment me.
“Fine.” Az agreed to your plan.
You all pulled sticks and held them up. Cass quickly let out a cheer, seeing his was the longest and started getting cozy in bed. You and Az glanced at each other and painfully made your way over to the bed. You sat on the edge of the bed when the spymaster hesitated.
“No. I’m not sharing a bed with her.” Az told Cass.
“Oh grow up. You’re mad at me so you’re going to throw a tantrum? It’s just for one night, then I promise you won’t ever have to be disgusted by sharing a bed with me again.” you snapped.
“What? No.. I’m not…I just…” He trailed off, “Fine. We leave at sunrise.”
Cass nodded his head in agreement and closed his eyes to sleep. You laid down and Az slowly got into the bed next to you, making sure to stay as far away as he could. The first thing you noticed was how cold the room was. Wrapping your arms around yourself, you decided to just try to stay put, too mad to ask for something to warm you up. Eventually, you let sleep take over.
You woke up to a large hand gently shaking your shoulder.
“Come on, you’re freezing.” Az whispered to you.
“I’m fine.” You stubbornly stated.
“No, you’re not. You’re literally shivering.” He argued.
You tried to stay completely still, to stop the shaking but you were just so cold.
“You would rather freeze to death than get close to me?” He added when you didn’t respond.
You stayed silent again and his hand traveled to your waist. His other hand slid under you and he pulled you into his chest. His wings wrapped around the both of you, creating warmth and giving you instant relief. You slightly pushed back into him even more, craving his body heat and he responded by wrapping his arms around you tighter.
You were still mad at him but you would be lying if this position didn't make you blush. For a while now, you've had a bit of a crush on the Shadowsinger, which is probably why everything he said to you hurt even worse. Pushing those thoughts to the back of your head, you decided to just relax.
The two of you fell asleep that way and when you woke up, his wings were still around you but now your face was nuzzled into his chest.
“It’s been sunrise for 45 minutes now. C’mon wake her up, it’s time to go.” Cassian complained.
“Shh. She hasn’t gotten this much rest in a while. Let her sleep a little longer.” Az grumbled.
His hands were rubbing up and down your back and you desperately wanted to stay like this longer. But then you remembered how mad you were at him so you opened your eyes. You got up and started to gather your things to leave, ignoring the look on Azriel’s face.
“Morning sunshine.” Cassian smirked at you.
You flipped him off and walked past him.
“Alright, we have to walk for about two hours north, then we can fly the rest of the way.” Az told you the plan.
“I know. Don’t forget I made the whole trip here.” You spoke with a sharp edge to your tone.
“Yeah, I was going to ask you. How did you know where we were? I mean you can’t fly so how did you follow us?” Cass inquired.
“I didn’t follow you. I tracked you. I stayed hidden the entire time and using the limited knowledge I had of the mission, I figured out where you were headed. It was actually pretty easy.” You asserted.
Cassian’s eyebrows raised in awe and Azriel’s eyebrows shot down in confusion.
“No that doesn’t make sense.” Az grumbled.
“Az, she outsmarted us and saved our asses. It’s time to admit you were wrong.” Cass stuck up for you.
You gave Cass a slight nod in thanks and the three of you continued to walk home. No one spoke for the rest of the walk until it came time to fly the rest of the way. You went up to Cass but he didn’t reach for you.
“I’m sorry, I hurt myself last night fighting the creature. Az will have to fly you.” Cass explained.
You were confused because he flew you last night after the mission but you were too drained to argue. Slowly, you made your way over to Az. Before Cass took off you heard him say 'Tell her' and fly off. You gave Az a confused look and he shrugged his shoulders.
He picked you up and the two of you took off. You could see Cass ahead of you but you were far back enough that he couldn’t hear you.
“What did Cass mean?” You asked.
Az stared straight ahead and didn’t respond.
“Really? I mean you can’t even talk to me now? You’ve been so rude to-” You started.
“I was scared.” He muttered, “I was scared of you getting hurt, ok? I didn’t want you in the field because I can’t lose you. I know you’re smart and strong enough but I was.. I don’t know. It’s stupid and I’m sorry.”
“Oh.” You said dumbly.
“That’s it?! Yell at me or something, I know I was an ass. I’m so sorry.” He told you.
“I’m not going to yell at you… I understand the fear of losing someone. Why do you think I wanted to come with? When I saw that beast on top of you about to kill you…I didn’t even stop to think. I just knew I had to save you, I’ve never felt that type of fear before. If something happened to you.. I don’t even want to think about that.” You told the male holding you.
“Well, I think it’s time for me to thank you for saving my life. If you weren’t there, me and Cass would both be gone right now, so thank you.” He gently spoke.
You gave him a warm smile and held onto him just a little bit tighter. There was comfortable silence for a little bit before you heard Az clear his throat.
“Now, tell me how you really tracked us all the way there. There was a point in the journey where we went through a portal. It would’ve been impossible to track us unless you had put a spell on the portal.” Az wondered.
“Ok fine. Once you got to the portal, one of your shadows noticed me and instead of letting you know, it stayed behind. It waited for me to catch up. Then it led me to you and even silenced my steps in the woods.” You admitted.
“What?!” he spoke in shock.
He looked down and could see a little shadow curled in your hair, peeking out like a child about to get scolded.
“You little traitor!” He gasped.
“Hey don’t be mean to it! I used my resources like you taught me, it just so happened that one of your shadows was a resource to me.” You let out a small laugh.
You could see the house coming into view when all of the sudden, Az took a turn and started to head towards a mountain instead. You weren’t sure where he was going but you trusted him so you stayed quiet. He landed and set you down.
“So there is actually one more thing that I have to confess. My shadows have always liked you.” He blurted.
“Well I like them too.” You told him, confused at his confession.
“Ok that’s not all.. I also like you, a lot. Look I’m not good at this, I actually have a terrible track record but all I know is I love you. And I don’t want to mess this up.” He finally revealed the truth to you.
“That’s actually really convenient because I love you too. I’ve actually been madly in love with you for a while now.” You told him.
“I really want to kiss you right now but I’m covered in mud and gunk from the mission yesterday and I want our first kiss to be nicer than that. After we get home and get cleaned up would you like to go on a date with me? Maybe get some dinner?” He nervously asked you.
“I would love nothing more than to go out with you.” You blushed.
His smile lit up his whole face. The two of you made your way to the house and once you were cleaned up you met in the living area. Before you left for your date you wanted to mess with him a little.
“I bet you’re happy I didn’t follow your orders, huh?” You joked.
“Yeah yeah, I would have told you my true feelings eventually.” Az grumbled.
“NO YOU WOULDN’T HAVE. I HAD TO LISTEN TO YOU BITCH ABOUT YOUR FEELINGS FOR HER FOR MONTHS NOW.” Cassian screamed.
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